#i fully acknowledge that this isn't a big deal and i can just deal with it

[something-about-sunflowers]

This is a really dumb and unimportant thing but I live to complain so I'm gonna:

The Revenge does not have a crows nest. It does not. It drives me CRAZY when I read in fic 'he/they was/were in the crows nest' because it does not have one. And because I know it's a dumb thing to be annoyed about.

What it DOES have are TOPS, which are little platforms on the masts that sit at different levels (with different names depending on which one). Stede and Ed were on the main-topmast the morning after the lighthouse fuckery.

[cutielando]

not fair | o.p.

synopsis: in which he gets unnecessary hate

my masterlist

Formula 1 was no joke. 

The amount of stress the drivers were being subjected to was sometimes almost ridiculous. Add that to also being a fresh rookie in the business and you're done for.

That's exactly how Oscar felt ever since joining McLaren for this year's season.

Getting the opportunity was everything he had been working towards ever since he was a little boy just starting up in karting. It was his dream to race in the big leagues, and now it was finally happening.

However, the first half of the season hadn't been going that well for your boyfriend.

He had been having a hard time getting a grip on the car, on the new tracks he hadn't driven before. F1 was much more demanding than F2 and it was taking a while for Oscar to get used to it.

You were there for him every single step of the way, cheering him on and supporting him fully. However, there was just so much you could do. 

The thoughts in his head couldn't be controlled and oftentimes he wouldn't let you in because he would think it was something he had to deal with on his own. No matter how many times you asked, he just wouldn't budge.

The summer break had been the one thing both of you had been looking forward to. You had been planning a trip back to Australia so Oscar could visit his parents and you were hoping some time away from the chaos of it all would be good for his mental health.

But of course, Oscar being Oscar, the first thing he did after arriving at his home in Australia was jump in the simulator he had set up at home, practicing different tracks for hours on end.

You would just about convince him to take breaks to eat and use the bathroom.

After 3 days of constantly sitting in the sim chair, you had decided that enough was enough.

It needs to stop.

♡♡♡♡♡

"Baby?" you called out, entering his game room where he had been in ever since he woke up several hours ago.

"Hm?" he barely acknowledged that someone else was in the room with him, his eyes trained on the track he was practicing.

"Can we talk for a minute, please?" you stopped behind his chair and put your hands on his shoulders, trying to get him to come back to Earth.

"In a moment, darling. Just let me finish this race and we'll talk, okay?" he quickly looked up and offered you a smile before his attention was back to the screen.

You sighed but mumbled an okay, leaning down to plant a soft kiss on the top of his head. 

Having some time on your hand, you just decided to sit down on the small couch in the corner of the room, scrolling through your phone while waiting.

After a couple of minutes, you heard the simulator turning off and Oscar joining you on the couch, wrapping his arm around your shoulders and pecking your temple.

"What did you want to talk about?" 

You sighed before twisting around to face him.

"You know I love you, right?" the words made Oscar's stomach turn.

Nothing good ever comes out after those words. Still, he decided to remain calm.

"I do. I love you too" 

You nodded, twisting your lips while deep in thought, trying to come up with a nice way to say what you wanted to say.

"I know how hard it's been for you this past few months, signing with McLaren and getting used to the stress and chaos that's F1. And I'm unbelievably proud of you baby, but what you're doing isn't healthy. You're a rookie, baby, you're learning the ropes and nobody expects you to get everything right on your first try. Everyone makes mistakes and the point is to learn from them. I know you've had a rough first half of the season, but it's not over yet. You need to take care of yourself and not let yourself lose sight of the big goal, baby. Obsessing over things and spending every waking moment in that sim while neglecting your health and training isn't helping anyone, my love" you took his face in your hands, cradling it.

He looked at you deeply, knowing that you were right.

He nodded, looking down at your lap so you wouldn't be able to see his lip quivering.

"I just wanted to prove to everyone that I deserve the seat and I deserve to be here" his voice was small, almost like a little child's.

Your heart broke at that.

Seeing your boyfriend fight so hard just so he could prove to his fans that he deserved to be a McLaren driver, putting that huge pressure on his health to prove himself made tears well up in the corner of your eyes.

"Baby, you don't have to prove anything to anyone. You are here for a reason and that is the fact that you are so immensely talented, my love. You've worked your ass off ever since you were a little boy and McLaren saw that, which is exactly why they fought so hard to sign you. You need to give yourself some credit and be proud of where you are, Os" you were caressing his cheek with your thumb, slowly gathering the tears that had started flowing down his cheeks.

"You're right, you're right. I'm sorry" he buried his face in your neck, sobs wrecking his body.

You kissed the side of his head as you held him tightly, grateful that he could finally let out everything he had been pushing down for months.

And you were right there for him.

♡♡♡♡♡

Oscar hated being told "I told you so", but he was grateful you got to say that to him in that moment.

Upon returning from the summer break, both McLaren drivers seemingly did a 180 and started absolutely dominating the grid every single race and every single sprint race.

You genuinely thought things couldn't get any better, but then Qatar rolled around.

And Oscar won his first ever Sprint in Formula 1.

To say that you were proud beyond words wouldn't do justice to what you were feeling.

Seeing him holding the P1 trophy made your heart swell and your stomach fill with butterflies like they did when you were just a young teenager falling for Oscar for the first time. Upon seeing him holding that trophy, you found yourself falling in love over and over again.

When the hype after the race finally calmed down and Oscar was finally able to return to his driver room where you had been waiting, there were only 4 words that needed to be said.

"I told you so"

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[euovennia]

short and sweet | ghost/soap/könig

sorry to the anon that it took me so long to get out, i've been dealing with some stuff but here it is! thank you for requesting, and as always, i hope you enjoy <3

pairings: ghost x reader, soap x reader, könig x reader

warnings: bigotry, misogyny, people just being jerks, canon typical violence

summary: in which three buff military men become all too aware of your struggles. (based on this request)

simon 'ghost' riley

when the idea of simon having a crush comes to mind, i feel like he's one of those people who prefers to observe them from afar rather than have direct interactions with them

so that paired with the fact you're not in the 141 and you're mute, it's gonna take a very long while until you two start interacting, at least a few months after he realizes he's taken a liking to you

they'll usually be pretty short and sweet, but not in the typical sense you may be thinking of

i'm thinking something more along the lines of giving each other a small nod of acknowledgement when you pass each other in the shooting range; him having already practiced and you just barely walking in to start practicing

and honestly? he's completely fine with this arrangement

in fact he prefers it

he still gets a chance to give you a once over without getting distracted from the things he wants/needs to do throughout the day, he considers it a win

but when your target practice slowly begins to overlap with his, he's a bit surprised to find that he doesn't really mind it all that much

there's something oddly comforting about knowing you're just a few stalls down from him

and of course there's the added benefit of him getting to see you and your signature sniper rifle in action

for those of you wondering, yes, he's become quite aware of your talents

how could he not when soap made himself comfortable at his table during meal time and went on about, "a real cute girl and her impeccable aim."

soap's words, not his

and it continues on like this for a while, you two continuing on with your unofficially official meeting times

it becomes comfortable and familiar, two things simon isn't quite used to, but two things that he's quite content with

so he can't help but feel a little empty when you stop attending your unofficial meetings at the shooting range

he's more frustrated with himself than anything cause, let's face it, he's not the type to let himself get comfortable/familiar with just anyone so he's honestly more annoyed that he let himself get attached when he hasn't even made a move to properly talk to you (what a silly goose)

anyway, in true simon fashion he decides to deal with it by not dealing with it

in other words, he just kinda continues on with his routine because he's become so numb to the idea of people leaving his life (no matter how big or small of a role they played) that he doesn't bother acting out on any emotion he has if it does happen

and i think after a while he'll just kinda end up pushing you out of his mind (despite the fact his eyes are fully glued onto you whenever he sees you around base)

so when you walk into the range and make yourself cozy at your usual stall, he's a bit frazzled

so much so he ends up packing up his equipment and making a beeline for the exit

but it's at this moment he bumps into a particularly bratty group of recruits they'd gotten not too long ago

he has to practically hold himself back from snapping the poor kid's neck when he asks simon if he'd seen you enter the range

call it extreme, but the mocking smile that stretched across the recruit's lips as he said your name just ticked him off

simon is a man of intuition and so he can already tell something's not quite right so, curious, he just gives off a gruff, "yes," before waving them off

he's surprised that he manages to bite his tongue when he can hear of the recruits whisper a small, "what a fuckin' arsehole," as they walk away from him

anyway

cue him silently stalking after the group and being met with the sight of them crowded around you as you lay flat on your stomach, hands still steady on the rifle

he watches as you line yourself up to take the shot before eventually resting your hand on the trigger and pulling it, only to miss when one of the recruits purposefully kicks at your shin

another recruit makes herself comfortable beside you with a grin spread across her lips as her voice rings out in a mocking tone, "aw, poor thing missed her shot again. it's a wonder she's made it this far."

while his eyes narrow in confusion at your lack of response, it only eggs the girl on as she nudges your shoulder

"still can't talk, i see," she lets out a wistful sigh, "that's a shame. i think you'd sound really pretty screaming out for help on the field."

another recruit takes this as their chance to jump in, "guess we'll just have to leave her stranded. better for us anyway, no dead weight."

the girl by your side rolls her eyes, "we probably won't even get the chance to abandon her, she's so tiny. she'd probably get squashed like an ant before we could even try anything."

her remark elicits a laugh from the small group of recruits, but ghost certainly isn't smiling when he approaches the group and stares down at them with his trademark glare

they can definitely feel their souls leave their bodies when they look up and see him standing over them menacingly

it gets even worse when he opens his mouth, "that any way to talk to a fellow soldier?"

they all just kinda stumble onto their feet at his words, not bothering to say anything as their eyes remain pretty much glued to the floor

he's not having it though so he'll repeat his question, tone louder and meaner than before which causes one of the recruits to just let out a meek, "no sir."

too bad it was the one who insulted him earlier cause he immediately steps in front of them and just kinda, "what? arsehole not good enough an insult for ya?"

you, still lying on the ground and watching everything unfold, can't help the small smile that tugs at the edge of your lips as you witness the way the man's face visibly pales

upon receiving no response from him, simon straightens out his posture before point over to you and speaking once more, "you better pray that girl is more forgiving than i am, because if it were me, you'd all be covering your own asses out on the field."

he watches with great joy as they each begin to shift on their feet uncomfortably before dismissing them in a gruff voice

after making sure they left, simon makes his way back over to you who is still lying on the ground with your rifle as you line up your shots once more

he feels a small wave of pride overcome him when you hit your target perfectly

so much to the point where he walks over to you and spills out a quick, "good aim," to which you'll look up at him with those gorgeous eyes of yours and give him a small nod of acknowledgement

his eyes narrow, "you don't talk much, do you?"

you simply shake your head

he'll give you a quick once over before looking down at his watch and realizing the dining hall will be closing soon

tempted as he is to just walk away, he can't help but wonder if you'd already ate

so he speaks again, "dining hall is closing in a bit. you're free to join me if you haven't eaten yet, was just on my way."

you pause for a bit and give it a bit of thought before nodding and packing up your stuff before eventually walking out of the range with simon by your side

you don't have the heart to tell him you already ate

but when you look up and see him quickly avert his eyes from you and onto the pavement beneath your feet, you don't see why you even would

john 'soap' mactavish

when i tell you this man was gone the moment he saw you, i mean he was GONE

he genuinely couldn't believe someone as sweet and lovely as you could exist in the same space as him

but the moment he sees you shoot that gorgeous little rifle of yours with a precision that could only be described as pure, raw perfection? it's over. he's all in.

i'm talking, 'fuck me up and send me straight to heaven. this is how i die.'

he's so down bad for you it's insane

and i imagine soap can be quite confident and charming when he wants to be so best believe he'll have no problem in walking straight up to you and trying to strike up a conversation

i'd like to put emphasis on the 'trying' part of that last bit because it becomes quite clear quite quick that you're don't talk

well

maybe the 'quite quick' part isn't so accurate because it probably takes him a minute or two before he finally catches onto the fact you don't talk

in other words, it takes you pulling out your phone and looking up a volume muted symbol and pointing at it before motioning to yourself for him to catch on

he just kinda makes an 'oh' face before letting out a small chuckle and saying something like, "i see now, why didn't ya just tell me that before?"

and you're just looking at him like ???

but he's looking at you like :)))

yeah he's being a little ridiculous right now, but he just got back from a long mission and he's quite sleep deprived so don't mind him he's just being a silly goose, ok?

but truth be told, that dumb little first interaction doesn't even really matter in the long run because it's the bold initiative on his part that makes it so easy for the two of you to become friends

you spend a lot of time hanging around one another and your once carefully planned, scheduled days turn into unpredictable blurs that are jam packed with soap getting the two of you into trouble

i imagine you've become quite familiar with the stoic face of captain john price

but really, how could you not?

especially when soap catches onto the fact that price is more inclined to let soap off with a warning for whatever trouble he's got himself mixed up in whenever you're around

he may be older than the rest of his team, but he knows that dopey grin soap's got plastered on his face whenever he's around you means he's extra sweet on you

and who is he to stand in the way of his boy's happiness with some extra chores?

he's a total dad <3

anyway

because you spend a lot of time around soap, i think it's fair to say that you sometimes end up pushing off work in favor of hanging around the scotsman

and really who could blame you?

he's got a dazzling smile, a charming accent, and a sparkling personality. you'd be a fool not to soak up all the time you can get with him

but that just means whenever he does end up leaving for missions, that's when you really buckle down and start getting all your piled up work done

it can be frustrating and a bit of a bother, but knowing your schedule will be completely free (at least for a little bit) as soon as he gets back is more than enough to get you through the tedious work load you've allowed yourself to accumulate

only this time it's a bit harder to remember that

and it's all because of your newly assigned CO

he's a bit of an older man, which isn't a bad thing

at least until you find out that his mindset lines up with the ideology of a 1950's working husband

you know, the kind of guy who believes it's a man's job to go out and work a job to provide for his family while his wife stays home and takes care of the children, house, and meal prepping

in other words

a complete and utter bigot

so between trying to complete all the work you'd so foolishly neglected in your time hanging out with soap and trying to stop yourself from snapping your superior's neck every time he grabbed your rifle from your hands with a condescending, "careful! wouldn't a small thing like you hurting yourself with this," it's no wonder you couldn't remember that today was the day soap was returning from another one of his top secret missions

in fact, the thought doesn't occur to you at all until soap pulls up a chair beside your desk and makes himself comfortable while you're looking over some paperwork your darling CO had left you because he, "works too hard and needs a break."

more like a break in his skull, but to each their own

anyway i can definitely imagine soap carrying around a small notebook that you use to communicate with him when you can't be bothered to watch him try and fail to decipher your hand movements

and yes, he totally brings it on missions with him just so he can open it up and trace over your handwriting with a gentle touch and a soft smile and oh my god imagine confessing to him like that (i'm kinda dying to write an imagine based on that now (mute or non-mute reader, i'm down for either tbh) so lmk if you're interested!)

anyway

when the two of you break apart from your usual 'welcome back' hug, he'll slide the notebook over to you as a simple question falls from his lips, "since when do you do paperwork?"

and this just prompts you to let out a huff and roll your eyes before snatching up the notebook/pen combo and writing out all your frustrations on the pages

it's safe to say this man is absolutely floored when he reads through it all

frustrated and angry as he is, he doesn't outwardly express it

he simply grabs the heap of paperwork sitting on your desk and promptly tosses it into the nearest recycling bin before grabbing your hand and leading you off to something completely unproductive and time wasting

it's exactly what you need

the night will eventually end off with him walking you to your room and offering you a sweet hug with a small lil kiss to your head

it's adorable, really <3

what's not so adorable is the way he barges into price's office with the notebook in hand before tossing the pages where you'd detailed your CO's behavior onto his desk

price reads through them and best believe all this man can see is red

as someone who takes pride in becoming a role model for those who work under him, he can barely believe of the things he's reading

he's so ready to throw hands

but he can't sadly

so he settles for the next best thing

COMPLAINTS, COMPLAINTS, COMPLAINTS

with how ruthless price is in his mission to humiliate this man, it's really no surprise when you eventually find out he's been fired

the moment you and the rest of your unit get the news, you practically run all over base to find soap

and the moment you do, you've pretty much tackled him to the ground in a hug

and he simply wraps his arms around you, that same dopey grin price teases him for stretched onto his lips because he knows and he couldn't be happier

he's just happy you're happy <3

könig

so because of his affiliation with KorTac, i like to imagine that you're part of another PMC group that tends to help each other out on missions whether it be due to mission overlap, or just needing some extra support

but despite this, i imagine it would take quite some time before you and könig even meet simply due to the fact that you're almost never assigned to be sent out on the field

and if i'm being honest, i can definitely see not a single member of KorTac having even the slightest clue that you exist until you're randomly brought onto the field one day during a particularly tricky mission

long story short, könig and a few other of his team members got ambushed and they needed all the help they could get which is where you come in

granted they don't actually see you until you all meet back at base, safe and sound as can be

while könig and his team are surprised by the new face, they're even more surprised to learn that you've been part of the team for nearly eight whole months

when asked about why they've never seen you on the field before, the answer is simple; "she's been doing other missions," which you've come to learn essentially means, "she's still in training because we don't trust her to be on her own yet."

and while the other members of KorTac seem to just take that simple explanation at face value, könig can't help but notice the way your face falls and shoulders slump upon hearing it

and it's at this moment he realizes he hadn't seen you anywhere on the field at the time, so where the hell were you?

he decides he needs to be more attentive

so the next time KorTac calls on your group for some extra assistance, he's keeping a sharp eye out there in hopes that he'd see you

but he doesn't

even so, he still holds out hope for next time

and the next

and the next

and the next

okay this is ridiculous

where the hell were you?

he knows you're going on the missions with the rest of the team because you're always there when everyone gets back to base, still dressed in your tactical gear and wiping off the dirt that seemed to cling onto your uniform

so why did he never actually see you?

he's a tall guy so surely, he, out of anyone, should be able to pinpoint your location on the field with a few simple turns of his head, right?

well apparently not

you're practically a ghost (hehe see what i did there)

his frustration with not knowing where you're at on the field has him going mad

he so desperately wants to just come out and ask you directly, but he's convinced himself that you'll somehow take offense to such a question so he decides against it

so he decides to settle on the next best thing

which is pretty much just endlessly staring you down on the field before you eventually disappear off to god knows where

it's not the smartest idea he's ever had if the way you seem to squirm under his piercing gaze is anything to go by, but he just can't seem to help it

especially not when he comes to notice just how pretty you really are

the soft slope of your nose, the curve of your jaw, the way your cheeks puff out so cutely when you're finally able to get your hands on a much needed snack after a particularly long mission

you're stunning, how could he not stare?

yeah he's definitely got a little crush

but he'll never admit it

especially not with the amount of teasing horangi throws his way whenever you enter the room

anyways i think i'm getting ahead of myself here, let's get back on track lol

i imagine it all comes to a head on the battlefield

one moment könig is going at it with no more than three enemy soliders, but it seems within the blink of an eye those numbers have nearly tripled as he sees a sizeable group of enemy soldiers heading this way

he knows he's more than capable of holding his own in close combat, but with this many people? he can't help but feel a little uneasy as he sees the group grow closer and closer

that is, of course, until the unmistakable sound of a rifle fires through the air and the group of soldiers who were previously approaching him steadily begin to fall to the ground, a pool of crimson blood flowing from their heads

könig's eyes catch onto a bright red laser making small patterns on the ground in front of him so, curious, he looks up to find the source of the light coming from under a pile of rubble located on the roof of a building

upon making eye contact with the small area, the red laser pointer goes dead and you quickly poke your head out from your self appointed hiding spot and offer him a small 'ok' motion with your hand before concealing yourself back into your spot once more

he swears his heart soars at the sight

satisfied with himself and your stellar aim, his mind becomes preoccupied with the mission once more, a newly placed sense of vigor in his attacks

but when everyone is cozying up in the common area after the mission's been completed (with the exception of you bc you're taking a shower), könig decides he can't hold himself back from asking a certain question that's been on his mind for a long time

so he simply decides to go for it and ask, "why hasn't she been assigned to our missions before?"

your teammates all look at each other for a few moments before one of them pipes up, "didn't think she was ready."

another one decides to offer their input, "there are times we still don't think she is, but our captain told us to bring her in anyway."

könig and the rest of those present from KorTac's confusion must be apparent because one of the other members of your team decides to speak out, "she was still a bit rocky when she first came to us. we just wanted her to polish up on her skills before we sent her out on an official mission. it's more out of worry than anything."

the explanation calms the small bout of worry that had infested his mind when they first offered their reasoning for not including you on missions, but he can't help but feel a little pit grow in his stomach

so he decides to speak up once more, "well i think they're capable. perhaps it's time you trust them more."

one of your teammates brows raise, "you think so?"

he nods, "took out a whole group of soldiers that were coming at me, i'd probably be done for if it weren't for them."

he finds the look of shock on their faces amusing as they ask, "how?"

könig leans back, "they were hiding in some rubble on one of the buildings. took them out with a sniper."

he watches a look of realization come over their faces as one of them exclaims, "i thought they were running around the field, not hiding!"

horangi decides to pipe in, "you didn't know? she's always running around the rooftops. i see her all the time."

your teammates practically implode on themselves at his revelation before they start hounding him for questions, ones he graciously answers

könig watches with a small smile hidden under his hood before he can see a small movement of the corner of his eye

he turns his head and sees you peering over at him with a small smile and he watches as you sign out a quick, "thank you," with your hands

he sucks in a sharp breath before bringing up his hands and signing back a shaky, "you're welcome"

his hidden smile widens as he watches your eyes glisten with delight, "you know sign?"

he's quick to respond, "since i was little."

horangi is the one to give his arm a harsh nudge when könig all but freezes upon seeing what you sign to him next

"would you like to join me for dinner?"

[wordy-little-witch]

Ya know what occurs to me?

Karai Bari is in the New World.

Crocodile and Mihawk only showed up after the establishment of the delivery service.

Buggy was in Paradise. Marineford would have been in Paradise, I think, or at least Buggy's crew still was.

He doesn't have conquerors to cross the calm belt.

So... to get to the New World and set up shop, he'd have to have gone through Fishman Island, wouldn't he? So he'd had to have gotten the ship coated.

He'd likely have had to face Rayleigh or at least he'd have anticipated it - maybe Shanks even mentions Rayleigh hanging around there, maybe even mentioning him having NEVER missed Shanks passing through....

So when Buggy goes when Buggy expects to be found and claims to be dreading it and is but is also so hopeful so scared so broken so hesitant he's got a few different courses figured for how this will go down.

Only.... Rayleigh isn't there. Shakky is. She just directs them to another coater. Buggy fights himself, wants to ask, doesn't want to beg, and-

Shakky answers the question he couldn'tdislodge from his throat. "Sorry, baby blue, Ray's just working on something real important. You know how it is."

He does. He does know how it is. Important, huh? That's fine. It's probably a job. It's probably not that big of a deal that dad master Rayleigh is preoccupied. Buggy shouldn't have expected the man to drop everything and come running why did he think that, Rayleigh never did it before, not even Shanks' assurance he'd leave a message for Rayleigh would change much, and fuck he can't afford to cry so-

So Buggy gets the ship coated. It's not as pricy as he'd worried. He navigates them down, can even bring himself to smile at the wide eyed wonder from the rest. It's nice. He's fine here - these are his people. He's okay, really, and he'll be able to let this go or shove it into that nameless box in his head and heart soon enough. He just has to ride the wave, you know-?

Only no. Not really. Because a newspaper lands in his hands. And his brain is racing.

Because Rayleigh wasn't at Sabaody at all. He was with Strawhat. He was training Strawhat. He showed up, after the war, so close to the conflict, to train the kid. Rayleigh is fast, but not that fast. He'd have to have left around a week before Buggy even arrived. Shanks had assured him Rayleigh was there when he dropped by ((two weeks ago)). He knew because his brother had wrapped him in his arm and tears were shed, voices were raised and hearts were broken, wounds torn open to drain the festering rot and the healing hurt, it hurt then, it hurts now, it will hurt and hurt and hurt, because Buggy had pushed the Big Top to her near limits just to reach the archipelago that his former guardian ex-father previous family that Rayleigh called home. Shanks had called him, said he'd dropped the message and Rayleigh had chuckled and nodded and Buggy wanted to see his dad because there were still so many scars that had to be seen and acknowledged and Buggy himself wasn't even fully recovered physically but emotionally he had to do it, had to take the step and try because vulnerability brought the best and worst of him out, because he lost a brother and gained him back and he wanted for his father, at least one of them.

But Strawhat was on that front page. And Rayleigh was behind him, smiling, warm, proud, happy, and - Buggy aches. He's angry. He's livid. A week or so, by his estimate, for Rayleigh to find him and get there to the war ground. A week or so because Rayleigh was old but he was still painfully fast. In a week or so, the older man hunted down a boy he'd possibly met once or twice in passing. A week or so and The Dark King showed up to bring another strawhat wearing monster of epic proportions under his wing, had made impressive time in finding the kid, making the plan, getting to the navy hq, getting out, and that's accounting for the article writing, printing, and distribution.

A week or so to find a bright little sunshine boy he barely knew when one he raised rotted in a cell for months on end.

Busy with something real important, he recalled Shakky saying.

His chest burned for a moment, hot and wild and unyielding - and just as suddenly, the fire was gone. He was tired. He was so fucking tired. His injuries throbbed, his head hurt, his scars itched. He sighed, set the paper aside and curled impossibly small into his chaise lounge with a teary chuckle as he gripped his hair and tried to silence the keen building in his chest. He cursed himself for it, bitter and angry.

After all, he should be used to being outshined, out classed and out loved by energetic boys with bright smiles in little wicker crowns.

Story of his life

He is unaware of the many eyes on him, of the people Plotting and Arranging things on their own time. Their captain is the best - uncommon, unexpected, temperamental though he is, he is everything everyone needs him to be because it's the only thing he knows how to do. They see the seams in his mask and performance, and they ache to pay back the pain left on their captain, their boss, their leader and friend. Buggy pirates stick together, freaks and weirdos united - and nobody is allowed to hurt their captain without some serious followup.

[michaelawinter]

My genuine head canons about Eddie Gluskin that I wrote in my notes app:

I'd like to add a little disclaimer: these head canons involve some heavy topics, so, if you're not comfortable, you aren't obligated to stay.

Also, I do not support any of Eddie's actions..just to make it clear..

ANYWAYS I'VE ALWAYS WANTED TO DO THIS SO HERE WE GO

Like the idea of him being a tailor (if you don't know what that means it basically means a person whose occupation is making or altering suits, jackets, and dresses typically to fit a particular person.) He's so creative and almost patient enough to work with materials. I also like to think that's something he shares in common with his mother who must've taught him a good few things about creating and measurements..

He'll hum a little tune to himself as he's working, makes him concentrate more..

It's not always, though, sometimes he loses his patience if the sewing machine isn't cooperating like it should be..

Although his whole character is based on "love" and wanting to find a special bride who loves him just as much as he loves his bride, it's sad to say that his needs will never be fulfilled..

What I mean by this is that not only are his delusions serving him zero purpose but not only that, hurting anyone that comes across him cause he's so desperate to be loved. However, these delusions could be a result of a coping mechanism from all the trauma he went through.

It's like trying to break the generational trauma but instead making it far worse than you could imagine..

So, being severely damaged as he already is, he takes it upon himself to somehow create this little world where he has a family of his own, a beautiful wife and children.

I also like to think of him being trapped in his little cell where he has nothing but a bed and his own little imagination.., staring off into either the ceiling or some random thing and just sits there..,maybe even talking to himself or laughing..

- His mother's lack of acknowledgement for what had happened to him when he was small made him develop some sense of protective nature as a fully grown adult especially when he mentions the topic about having his own children..

- "He appears so charming and friendly" is what he wants some to believe, he cares about how he presents himself time to time..

He wants you to believe he can be good, a perfect groom, a perfect father he never had. He will show you this people pleasing, gentle, kind and loving personality before he completely switches up and becomes the opposite..

- So, about the love part. Some describe him as overly obsessive, which don't get me wrong, he is. Though, it might seem like this isn't much of a big deal to him cause he will show you every ounce of love he has and shower you with it, if you plan on giving yourself to him that is. You'd be his number one priority, you'll never feel like a choice, you are his everything.. It's always like living the dream from the very start, it'll feel like a movie in Hollywood but slowly yet surely this doesn't last how it should...

Imagine being taken care of by someone as charming and loving as he is, imagine him calling you loving words in his English accent and no I'm not just talking about "darling" , I'm talking about :

"Are you alright, my love?"

"Your virtues have so strangely taken up my thoughts.."

"I think you're stunning.."

"You look as pretty as always.."

He is old fashioned, so he will eventually take it upon himself to act like a gentleman around you, he will make the first move, gets you flowers, he plans everything since he would love spend time with you.. It's all about getting to know eachother..

You'd never have to do such work, stay at home and he will do all the providing. 50/50 chance he comes back home with some nice flowers or small gifts..,like I said, old fashioned..

His thoughts would only be you. His number one priorit would always be you. But,... it's not you?..

You're you but also you're not?..

His mind creates this character of you, it's what he's expecting from you, how you act, how you talk, how you dress, how you walk..it's what he expects from you rather accepting you for who you are. This results to a lot of guilt tripping..

And I know, it sucks, but should've thought about it that before going for a psychopathic maniac that's in an asylum for a reason..

- It's quite easy to spot this one, but one of his most common triggers is when someone makes him think they're going to abandon him.

"I can't be alone!.."

By the way, his height and his strength is actually so scary that if you do eventually try to abandon him by walking away, he'll break the door down, he'll find you, he'll do unspeakable things to either you or the furniture that's in his way of trying to get close to you

(Speaking of which: I've noticed a lot of people using the term "Yandere" for an individual with mental illness. Please, stop that..)

Outside of the asylum I like to think his sense of fashion is probably top tier old money, just casual and nice..

Probably likes taking night walks with his nice coat on. That'll keep anyone from expecting him to be a psychopath..

Originally, the man ((((COULD)))) be from England, however, his parents decided to move countries from Europe to America cause they probably liked it more that way..

Eddie is definitely those kinds of people who have that one parent that's always been treating them like shit their entire childhood but still hold a special place in their heart for them cause they don't have anyone else.. That's Eddie towards his mother, I mean, he was her son...all he had was her and deep down he believes that, there was a point she wanted to help..(Even though her absence permanently damaged him)..

But somehow..that caring nature, that charming side of him, that right there, that came from her..

[elrielffs]

If Elriel isn't endgame, then what is the point?

Speaking from a purely narrative and writing perspective, what would all the Elriel scenes have achieved character wise or story wise?

To build tension for Elucien? There is already plenty to work with if SJM wanted to go that route, Elain dealing with losing Grayson and gaining Lucien with one blow, Lucien being part of Elain's trauma which she acknowledges to his face, coping with a mating bond that she doesn't understand and doesn't want but feels a pull to...prime material that SJM has not capitalized on. (I can't think of any reason Elriel would serve Azriel/Gwynriel in a build up to their relationship.)

Instead of building little scenes like she has for Elriel, she sent Lucien away (to another woman to boot!). I've stated before that if Elucien was endgame, 100% it would have been Lucien that figured out Elain was a seer. It would have been so easy to include that, it's not even a romantic scene but it speaks to the connection between characters especially after Madja stated a mate would know what's wrong. If there was any other scene, that needed to between Elain and Lucien to convince their endgame, it was this one because then you're left wondering why did Azriel know and Lucien didn't, especially since Lucien has the bond that gives him insight to Elain on another level than anyone else?

The same could be said for Gwynriel. It would have been so easy for her to set up scenes for them if that's the route she was going during ACOSF, even a crumb of what Elriel has gotten would suffice. Once again my main sticking point for Gwynriel like Elucien with the Seer revelation is Azriel not caring enough about Gwyn in the Blood Rite. Siphons flashing doesn't speak to any other feelings besides being upset equally at all 3 women he knows and trained being in danger. We can compare to how Azriel reacted to Elain being kidnapped, which around that time, Az had spent the same amount of time with each character and did not have the same reaction.

All of SJM's relationships have served a point or fully run their course. An interrupted kiss is not a culmination or a end to a relationship being set up. If Elucien/Gwynriel happened, there would always be the what if. What if Rhysand didn't stop Azriel hovering in the background narratively. What if they had kissed? What if they had been able to pursue the relationship? SJM's other relationships have been allowed to explore this possibility so you know when they end up with other people, you don't question whether it worked with someone else or what ifs because you know because the relationship was allowed to run it's course and ended because of internal factors.

What paused the relationship growing between Elriel was an external factor, not an internal one. Internally, Azriel and Elain have no reason to stop having their feelings because nothing has happened between them to stop it, if anything they are exacerbated more by being denied and haunts the characters narratively (And Azriel in story).

But again, what's the point? What would be the factor narratively that Elriel would have served for both Elain and Azriel, especially since it's left unfulfilled?

There isn't one unless they are endgame and why it would be bad writing if not. This is one of the big factors that convince me about Elriel 100%. You don't just throw in these scenes between two characters as filler or background noise and you definitely don't leave it open ended if you are planning to pursue other options. Narratively, that's unsatisfying and poor set up if an author plans to move forward somewhere else. It means something and there's only one road that it all leads to.

[doink-boink]

I fully think that Zach does what he does because he is a VERY LONELY MAN. He makes robots to do his bidding (keep him company), he acts like he hates dealing with people but leaps at the opportunity to work with the other villains. He's also a genius whose ideas have been scorned since he was little, probably incredibly isolating for a guy who could have taken his ideas and used them in a good way if he was encouraged to do so. Major gifted kid to burned out adult vibes. I just feel like he has a lot of potential......

-Martincrushcameback

Yes!! Regarding leaping at the opportunity to work with the other villains, you can really see that in The Mystery of the Weird Looking Walrus!!

(More under the cut because I ramble for a good while)

He desperately wants Donita's approval as well as her friendship - of course that blows up in his face, not only because he didn't get her the pearl, but also because yknow. He's a big ol liar lol. I haven't watched the episode with it, (as I'm not on season 6) but you can see this when he compliments the Amphi-Trek XT!!

Zach stops himself short as he's about to compliment an invention that Aviva made because he wants approval from Paisley!

I want to explore this more in my fic, especially regarding WHY he and Aviva aren't close. They went science camp together, yes, but the show drops little details between them that implies that they might have actually been friends. Or at least, that's how I interpreted it!

In my AU I think that they were good pals up until Highschool, but Zach's decision to work with animals is what ends that friendship. He had no regard for their feelings and health, using them for his own gain. (Additionally, he starts to use animals/pursue that as concept as AVIVA began working in that field!! He wanted to connect with her, but ended up driving them apart.)

In typical Zach fashion, he refuses to stop what he's doing because it's getting him attention from others, maybe even the school itself, giving him the praise that he needs. His own ego ruins everything!! As it does in the show! Furthering "because it's giving him the praise that he needs" thing, I feel as though he isn't close WHATSOEVER with his parents.

At least, not in the typical fashion. AU wise, I think that Zach has a strained relationship with his father, but was very close to his mother! Want to make it a Moral Orel type deal with Clay's backstory where something happens and his mom is out of the picture, leaving him with his dad. Maybe this happens before he begins to use animals for his bidding? It would make sense! He wants some sort of attention that he isn't getting at home, some sort of acknowledgement that he's doing something good!

Aaaa!! There's so many things to explore with Zach as a character!! He's so fun man. And so very tragic at the same time lol

Also would like to bring attention to his CLEAR want to express his self worth!! I feel like he "looks up to Aviva" in his own weird little way in canon. Of course he is actively 'tearing her down' here, but you can tell that he KNOWS what she's capable of and wants the other villains (that's the context here, I believe it's Paisley's introduction to them) to believe that he's capable.

Even after this it's really clear to see that regardless of how he feels about her, he LIKES Aviva's inventions enough to steal them time and time again!

Dude. Dude just go work with her man it's for your own good... Wink wink nudge nudge I toooootallly won't do this in Somethings Never Change nooooooo

But genuinely, he would have so much to gain from WORKING WITH AVIVA. He wants her companionship so bad man.

Sorry this post got so unbelievably LONG lol, I've got a lot on my mind about these guys. Also apologies that I went on my own little sub tangent about my fic, hope it was okay!!

[deathbxnny]

Helloooo ! How r u ? Can I request how would HSR mens will react with a s/o that is the Herrscher of Finality ? (Like Jing Yuan, Blade, Welt and Dan Heng) s/o has the same power as this Herrscher, and that has travelled through HSR world with their powers. Would they make theories about them being someone related to Terminus (Aeon of Finality) ? And how they would react to their powers as well (like earth being placed down a samsara, stopping time, and maybe if you want ascending Herrschers ?)

It's okay if you don't, take care of you :D

(By the way, sorry if I'm making grammatical errors, english is not my original language :( )

-----♡

A/N: Hello Anon! Sorry this took years to complete and I hope you can forgive me for that! Also, thank you for the request! This maybe quite short though, as I admittedly stopped playing the game way before HoF came out and I don't know how to write alot for this. But I hope you'll like it anyways.

Content: Fluff, established relationship, mentions of battle, Reader has HoF abilities, sfw

Reader has no set pronouns!

((Not fully proofread))

-----♡

》Blade

Blade doesn't ever admit it, but he finds your abilities secretly very intriguing. Even if he's absolutely convinced, that you somehow got them from an Aeon. Not that he really cares for their origins, as your strength and power is what he loves the most. Especially your ability to just stop time whenever you want, as he finds it to be the only moment he can find some peace from the busy world around him. He also will begrudgingly listen to you speak about your many journeys, acting like he doesn't care, as he leans in closer for more.

He always watches in anticipation, when you're in battle. The moment you use your abilities and defeat your unsuspecting enemies with ease, he always nods in quiet acknowledgement at your strength he respects so much. When you explain to him your origins and ability to even ascend herrschers, he finds himself even more impressed. Your power is unrivaled to him and anyone that dares disagree, will meet the end of his sword.

-----♡

》Jing Yuan

When he first learns of your abilities and strength, his mind immideatly theorises just how exactly you could have gained them. The first one that came to mind, was ofcourse you being somehow blessed by an Aeon and eventually, he concludes that that might just be true. You are certainly divine to him after all. And he has no qualms to use your great abilities for his plans and strategies as well. He has you therefore always working very closely to him and admires your powers that way to the fullest. He also always urges you to tell him about your travels and wants to know every single detail.

He secretly near worships your abilities on the battlefield, often standing back with a smug, proud smile, as you obliterate your common enemy. Your ability to ascend other herrschers also fills him with a deep need to know more and perhaps even see it himself. To say that he was absolutely smitten with you, would be an understatement.

-----♡

》Dan Heng

Dan Heng didn't really care much for your abilities. Not because he didn't find them impressive, he just simply saw no point in making a big deal out of them and simply just saw them as another part of you he loved dearly. He however doesn't mind you telling him all about your journeys and often wonders, if he can join you on the next one. He might even archive your stories for future use in his database.

On the battlefield, he'll nod impressively at your power and feats, but that's where his visible praise usually stops. Your time stopping abilities do intrigue him however, even if it isn't too noticeable. He just finds the way everything comes to a full stop, except for you and him, somewhat comforting. Especially when he can just hold onto the moment with you for just a bit longer.

-----♡

》Welt Yang

Welt was impressed by your abilities, but not surprised by them. He ofcourse knew all about Herrschers, having been one himself, which is why he doesn't make too much of a big deal out of it. He'll even help you with a cover story from everyone else too, if needed be. But with that said, he loves hearing of your travels and enjoys sharing his own stories too, whenever you catch up after missions. He chuckles softly, whenever you tell him about the theories people have about your existence, as he knows the full truth ofcourse.

He has your back during battles and often keeps you safe, even during your time stopping ability. He respects your power and strength and doesn't allow anyone to underestimate you. Even if he's the only person to know of your real origins, he takes alot of pride in having you as his s/o.

-----♡

A/N: Okay, I hope this was fine! And thank you again for the request!<33

[mod2amaryllis]

Forgive the incoming rant, I fully agree with what you're saying.

I've always been in the mindset of 'Yes, reasonable accommodations must be acknowledged and made, but if a person's limitations full stop prevent them from doing the job, then they shouldn't be in the role!'

I'm someone who has disabilities, and guess what? I am passionate about my work, so I make my struggles my business to handle so that I can still perform the job required of me. In the case of dealing with literal lives, it's even more important for a person to either find a way to handle their limitations or get out of that role

As an example, I used to work as a performer at Disney, and we have people as Attendants, who's literal job is to be the voice of the performer and keep us safe. I was once partnered with an Attendant in a wheelchair for several weeks. Fully bound, could not function without it. Very nice person, but because of that, several times I would be physically attacked or hit or need help because something inside the costume slipped, and I couldn't see and this person literally could not help me because of their limitations.

Is it important to be inclusive? Absolutely. Is it just as important to make sure that a job can be performed as it should be? Yes. Full stop.

accommodation should not have come at your expense, and it sounds like it very much was. that's not helping anyone in a professional situation.

and as someone with my own limitations, i agree. ESPECIALLY in my line of work. the safety of my patients comes first, and if an employee can't guarantee that safety then this isn't the place for them.

in my coworker's case, the thing that really frustrates me is that i do sympathize, and i want to accommodate to the best of my ability, but with her specifically, there's this aspect of like.. ego. she's always saying how she wants to do the big stuff and talks a really big game, then when we correct or criticize when she under performs, there's no humility. there's just excuses, mainly centered around adhd. she wants there to be another way of doing the "big stuff" that works within her confines but there's just not. either you focus on keeping a patient safe or you don't.

[yuri-is-online]

Ruggie 🤝 yuu 🤝 jamil

Being tired of everyone's shit.

They can be polyarmory or something. Of you're so tired you're ready to just fall over? Idk bitch have a cuddle and a quick nap. The two others can watch your respective spoiled little shit for you. They can all feed eat each other their cooking while screaming about their uncertain futures. Making plans to try and stay together while all silently acknowledging that it may all be for naught. But hey, if it does all go to shit, at least they had these moments of peace and freedom while they lasted. (They all breathe a huge sigh of relief when, years later, they're standing at an altar with matching rings and trying not to cry).

On another note. Adueceyuu is one of my favorite ships unironically. Classic friends to lovers trope with a big ol' slice of possible angst. Just going through the whole "What are we" anxiety stage and them not wanting to put a label of it because, "what if yuu leaves?" "What if we all drift during internships?" "What if we all hate each other next year?" "What if our entire dynamic changes as soon as we acknowledge this thing we're doing for what it is?" And they're trying to save themselves the heartache.

And then it all just boils over at a party when they start making out in the heat of the moment or something stupid like that. Have fun dealing with the consequences of those actions ace! Cause duece is ready to commit and do the honorable thing and yuu already rearranging their entire lifes future in their head to stay with their stupid stupid boys.

Grim looks on in utter disgust

>Grim looks on in utter disgust I live for this dynamic with him because it literally only applies to Ace and Deuce. He is ok with everyone else, just not those two. He knows what you are. (idiots)

I'm not the biggest fan of poly ships if I am being honest, I'm strictly monogamous so writing for poly stuff well/at all is hard for me. But for some reason literally none of that applies to Adueceyuu, I unironically love them all together. I think Deuce is the first to realize his feelings for Yuu, but he struggles with his feelings for Ace. He knows they're there of course, but he also has this image of Ace in his head as his rival he isn't fully willing to give up. Ace makes such a big deal of how lame romance is Deuce isn't willing to deal with the humiliation of being rejected and made fun of. Ace on the other hand... he knows what he's feeling but he is going to deny it for as long as he can for all of the exact reasons you listed. He loves so deeply and is so protective of both of them, but he cannot say it out loud because then that makes it real. So all three of them do this awkward dance that's just painful for the other members of their friend group to watch because they know that the card trick trio aren't together together, but try telling that to the rest of the school. You can't.

Que a fourth year graduation party where Ace opens his stupid bratty mouth and suddenly he's getting tagged teamed with open mouth kisses by both Deuce and Yuu, and wakes up the next morning with Yuu squished firmly between him and Deucey. Good luck getting out of this one Ace.

He totally pretends he was the one who asked them both out and made it official but all you have to do is glance at the look his partners faces to know that's not the truth.

I like the situation you wrote for Jamil and Ruggie, they clearly have mutual respect for each other in GloMas and both are deeply sympathetic to Yuu's situation. I could see them planning together for the future behind Yuu's back and discussing if they should encourage Yuu to stay, unfamiliar with the feelings of guilt the idea brings. It would be such a relief for them when things work out for them without any underhanded tactics.

[susiephone]

the internet's lack of nuance in general is always annoying but one thing i see come up over and over again is people refusing the acknowledge that book piracy is different than pirating tv or movies. and it is. it absolutely is.

unlike tv or movies, where, with some exceptions, everyone gets paid an agreed upon amount for their work, regardless of how much money the end product makes, authors make royalties- meaning how much they make is completely dependent on how many copies sell. some authors get an advance, which is a flat fee you get no matter what, but you don't start making royalties until you "earn out" your advance - so if i get an advance of, say, $10,000, i don't get any royalties for my book until it's sold enough copies to make $10,000 in royalties and paid the publisher back for the advance. most books never get that far. and $10,000 is not a number to sneeze at, but when you consider that books can take months to years to write, plus editing time, plus marketing (because 95% of that responsibility falls on the author unless you are extremely lucky) - when you break it down to how much money you're making for every hour of work you put into a book, it's really not a living wage, unless you're one of the lucky few who sells a lot of copies consistently, and/or gets large enough advances that you can live on it for a year or two while you write your next book.

i've seen some well-meaning people say that pirating from indie authors is wrong because they don't have the support or resources of a publishing house, and often don't sell a lot of copies at all - which is true. but i think a lot of people don't fully realize that most authors who are traditionally published, even ones who have had overall positive experiences with their publishers, don't usually make that much either. like i said, most people never earn out their advance, and most authors have to handle marketing mostly themselves - the books everyone's talking about, most of them probably got a big marketing push from the publisher with more money behind it. which isn't a dig at those books; publishers put money behind projects they think will make money, often because those books are good! but it is a self-fulfilling prophecy, and the books that get covered by every reviewer, get goodreads banner ads, get quotes from famous authors, end up in subscription boxes? very much the exception, and that's because the publisher can't afford to do that for every book. obviously sometimes there's an underdog, a book that didn't get a big marketing push but gets great word-of-mouth and grows that way, but if you're trying to make a living writing, you have to work for that to happen.

so with all that in mind, it really grinds my gears to see authors who say, "hey, book piracy significantly hurts my income" being called greedy, selfish, or "scabs".

i think some people think, "wow, you have a publishing deal from a big 5 publisher with a five-figure advance, and you still want more money? how greedy!" because they don't fully realize how the math actually works out for most authors.

like, pedro pascal is getting his fat paycheck no matter how many people pirate the mandalorian. no one working on dear evan hansen lost a dime because of the bootleg recordings floating around. and for the big new york times bestselling authors? yeah, most of them probably won't be hurt by people pirating their book instead of buying it. almost certainly stephen king is not going to notice if a few thousand people download an illegal pdf of the shining. but most authors, it does have an impact.

obviously, there is some nuance here - not everyone can afford books to read, and not everyone can access a library. and obviously if a book is out of print, that's a different discussion entirely. but "it's fine to pirate books because piracy is always ethical and victimless and authors who are against it are just scabs who hate poor people" doesn't really hold water for me. authors are not the bad guy for wanting to be compensated for their labor, and while it's not the reader's fault the royalties system doesn't let most authors make a good living at it, it's also not the author's fault.

if you want free books that don't screw the author over, advocate for more libraries with more funding! most libraries will also take requests for books to purchase for their collection, and, at least in the USA, "interlibrary loans" will let them temporarily borrow a book from another library system if someone wants it. see if your library is part of libby and hoopla, and if they're not, suggest they join. if you have a little extra money but can't afford new books, thriftbooks is a great place for cheap used books.

like i said, i am not saying everyone who ever pirated a book is a bad person, or that there's never a justifiable reason. i just wanted to introduce more nuance into the conversation.

[fancyfade]

i have a question, as i am also a big enjoyer of damian wayne and have been spinning around the concept of an arc/issue/solo for him and i like to hear people's thoughts an ideas: if you could right a solo, or an issue of detective comics starring damian wayne, what would right, because GOD, DC needs to give him to someone who'll actually do something with him.

hmmmm I think a good follow-up to Robin: Son of Batman, which focuses a lot on Damian trying to redeem/"redeem" himself for what he did in the League of Shadows, would be an arc where the idea that he was fully responsible is challenged.

(I don't necessarily think he has to agree with it, I think lots of batfam members have insane senses of responsibility and if they immediately all went like 'yeah you're right this isn't something I could stop' it would get boring. I just would like to see it challenged by the text, like babs tells cass that she wasn't at fault for killing someone as an eight year old in batgirl. Before cass goes to fight shiva to the death in a battle she does not intend on winning b/c she won't kill again XD)

anyway so with that in mind. i think talia should be involved. I know I'm so insanely mad whenever I see this panel (link) b/c Talia's being asked to apologize and redeem herself for something that wasn't even in character (and i followed up: Bruce can act OOC and get it swept under the rug or justified he doesn't have to apologize for it (link).) ANYWAY but thats besides the point the point is I'm imagining Talia hearing Damian say like "we all must pay, mother." and I think she'd be like "who tf even told you that????" and she'd be a good second point of view in this arc, challenging Damian's ideas that he needs to actively redeem himself or he was a bad person earlier, because while Damian just sees what he did vs what he's doing now, she sees him as her child.

I also went kind of on about this when reading Knight Terrors (link) but I think it would be deeply discomforting for Damian to contemplate the idea that he wasn't in responsible for what he did in the League, because the way he deals with it is ok wait i'll just quote that post:

I think if he followed these thoughts (that his training is something that was 'done' to him) further, it would scare him, because the way he currently copes with it and views the world in general is by everything being his fault and his responsibility - in his control. If he admits or acknowledges that he was just a kid being raised a certain way, it’s not in his control, it’s not something he can redeem himself from, and it falls outside his current way he views the world.

anyway that said that's what like. the general 'next step' of Damian's arc I'd have i think would be neat.

I'd also be down with like. literally just fun adventures, like I wouldn't even hate Damian in high school and solving low-stakes crimes like we have in batman and robin 2023 if it wasn't written so blandly

[gittetj]

I read through the Dorohedoro manga recently. It's great, there's a lot I could say about it, but one thing that kept sticking out to me was its weird... fascinating... kind of self-contradictory juxtaposition between copious amounts of fan service and the very non-sexual way the characters are written.

Nearly every one of Dorohedoro's female characters have at least one scene where they're fully or partially nude. Some of them have more than I can count on my fingers. It's a lot of boobs. A lot of butts. Occasionally there's a natural reason for it, but most of the time, it really is fan service. There'll be a random shower scene, or they need to undress for some reason, or they are so incredibly unfortunate as to lose their clothes in battle, whoops.

But then, the funny thing is that even with the most needless of boob flashes, there's very little to sexualize the characters in the actual story. The nudity is presented as neutral. In the context of the world, nobody cares if someone happens to be naked - at most, other people find it confusing or mildly inappropriate. Nobody is objectified or looked down upon. Most of the time there isn't even any embarrassment or self-consciousness on the part of the nude person. Sometimes the absurdity is played for laughs, but not in a demeaning way. It just kind of happens and it's no big deal.

So, since the tone of the manga is like that, the fan service aspect becomes this weirdly meta thing that only exists between the author/artist and the reader, and I don't think I've ever seen that anywhere else? It's also interesting how it often happens in big, important scenes, you know front and center where there's no downplaying it. Meanwhile I can't remember a single one of the bonus comics that feature any nudity.

I feel like Q Hayashida does this with other things too - makes herself very visible as an author. Like, there are some plot developments that are completely ridiculous or would've been a plot hole in a different story, but because they're presented with that meta acknowledgement that yes, this is silly, just go along with it, the story can get away with its absolutely insane plot.

Yeah, I don't know.. I just find it interesting

[whimsicallywiddershins]

The Provost's Dog series is amazing in how Tamora Pierce calmly and nonchalantly addresses sexuality, relationships, gender, and gender roles.

In the very first few chapters we have Rosto, Kora and Aniki together in some sort of a poly/open/threesome relationship. It's never actually stated directly what their relationship is, if it's romantic, open, sexual but not romantic, queer platonic, if Kora and Aniki are together, ect. But real life relationships are not black and white. And very few people advertise the exact details, and good friends don't really ask or make a big deal about it. Which is exactly what happens in Terrier. And it's a very healthy relationship. Kora decides to date Erksen instead, and Rosto and Aniki are completely fine with it. There is no resentment, fighting or jealousy. As Kora says, she is her own woman. I have never seen such a drama-free relationship in a young adults book before. It really shows a young reader that relationships can be simple and you can still be friends if it doesn't work out.

And then the sneaky descriptions of "spintry." Another term for a male prostitute. There is no judgement for a spintry, no one finds it strange and both female and male prostitutes are treated exactly the same, as just a job, as any other in the Rouge's Court. It was such a simple and refreshing take in a children's book, and it's done so well with no judgement or any acknowledgment that it's not normal.

That feeling of normality is an ongoing theme in the Provost's Dog books. There are a lot of shocking and liberal topics in the books, but they are treated as normal, everyday things, so it takes away any shock value and makes the reader simply accept it. Considering most readers are teens, that's a pretty great thing.

Take Okha/Amber. A transwomen/gender queer person who is in a long-term relationship with a man, a police captain. It's described as a normal thing. Beka is a bit confused at first, because she has never met a gender queer person before, but accepts the explanation and moves on. Amber's gender is never really fully explained, but thay makes sense. Gender isn't simple. In a fantasy world without modern labels, Amber is just Amber. They are who they are.

Beka has several flings throughout the series, and its treated normally. That is not usually seen in a teen book. The main female character having casual relationships, going into them knowing they won't last? That is super rare, and is how real life works. It's a great break from normal ya relationship drama.

There is some relationship drama in the series, with Beka's fiance, Holborn. He dies before Mastiff starts, and we never met him. But later, it is revealed that she was planning on breaking up with him because he was emotionally abusive towards her. She ends up meeting Farmer and getting over Holborn quickly. She feels guilty for not feeling more guilty over his death, instead feeling relieved that their toxic relationship is over. She loves some of the time they spent toghether though, and she does mourn him. It's a fascinating and nuanced relationship you never see in a ya book. But her and Farmer's relationship is wonderful.

As a young teenager growing up in a conservative, rural, small town, the Provost's Dog books were revolutionary, not that I realized it at the time. The book's description of gender, of relationships was so normal I didn't even realize it could be something debated. I just accepted it as normal. Okha/Amber was the first time I ever learned thay trans/gender questioning people could exist, and I just acted like Beka, accepted it and moved on. When people talked about poly relationships, how strange and unusual it was, l was confused, because Kora, Aniki and Rosto were normal to me. Learning prostitutes were discriminated against was shocking. Complicated relationships were normal.

I remember once in highschool, my teammates were talking about a scenario where your husband cheats on you with another woman, and that woman had a child with him, and they are now homeless. Your husband loves this woman and you. Would you accept the child and the other woman living with you? Or something inane like that.

I said, "Well, yeah, if she's a good person. If my husband loves her, then she's probably a good person, and I would try to fall in love with her too. And raise the child together."

My teammates did not expect that answer. I suppose I should have realized then I wasn't straight lol.

[umbreonkin197]

Journal of a Questioning Otherkin (Entry 7)

I've been growing more comfortable with seeing myself as an alterhuman more consistently, but that hasn't really done much to fix the doubts about my specific identity or the species dysphoria/dysmorphia I've been dealing with. I guess progress happens in little steps.

A big thing I've been struggling with is feeling this weird sense of awkwardness/embarrassment from expressing my nonhuman side around trusted individuals. It's like, they're fully supportive and it makes me genuinely euphoric being treated like an animal, but there's still some part of me that says I'm being childish and that makes me feel like it's something I shouldn't be wanting. I'm doing my best to work past that, but I just feel like I should acknowledge it in my journaling too.

After a previous post, some comments let me know about fictherians/fictotherians and I'm super grateful for that! I feel like that fits me so much better than just standard fictionkin. Another little step forward.

Though I'm wondering, if I AM an Umbreon, does that mean some small part of me is or was an Eevee as well? I mean it makes sense, and in a way I do feel like a small little guy who has the potential to become so much but is struggling at the crossroads of what path to choose. Perhaps I'm overthinking it too much. But regardless, Eevee sounds very plausible all things considered, even if it's simply just that as an Umbreon, I was once an Eevee. Maybe part of me still is that Eevee. I don't know how this works. Below is a relevant image-

In terms of my wolf identity, I'm still not quite sure if that is in addition to my Umbreon self or on top of it, or maybe just close enough to it that I feel connected? I know I CAN be both, but my brain is so irrationally afraid of taking on "too many" thereotypes at once and I stress out about it.

There's a different question I've had though. Am I specifically a wolf? I realized that I only gravitate towards wolf because it's what I'm most familiar with. In all likelihood, I'm fairly certain that my true self is some form of canid or canid-like creature, but I've been curious about doing some deeper research into different species of canids and seeing if any of them click. I don't know really anything about dholes and dingoes and jackals and the like, so it's hard for me to say at the moment. Maybe I'll find something there that resonates much more deeply than wolf, but wolf is just the best word I have for it at the moment. Who knows.

One last side thought, I really want to start looking into therian gear. I know it's not required to be valid, but I genuinely do feel like it might help me combat the feelings of dysphoria I have. I want a collar so bad. Do any of you guys know good places to look online for therian made therian gear? Not just a collar, but therian related gear in general? I don't mind paying more if I'm supporting smaller creators, especially if it's someone inside of the therian community. I would love to support that while also supporting my real self.

Anyways, small steps forward to feeling comfortable about myself. Maybe it isn't as big as I would like, but it's steps forward nonetheless.

Take care, until next time. -Bre

[acourtofthought]

HAVE YOU READ THE BONUS CHAPTER!? I NEED YOUR THOUGHTS!

Bonus Chapter Spoilers Ahead in regards to the ACOTAR characters:

I think the bonus really highlighted the friendship that seems to continue building between Az and Nesta. In it we see Az apologize for his snapping at her which is a big deal for his character as he's one to usually sulk and brood rather than owning up to his behavior. And I think that's all very important when you consider Gwyn and Nesta are best friends (along with Emerie) and Cassian and Az are best friends. So a relationship between Gwynriel with a beautiful friendship between Nesta and Az is a pretty perfect setup.

I also think it shows Az and Nesta still haven't fully learned their lesson about undermining Elain considering Nesta talks of how she and her sister were made fae by the King and Az immediately follows that up with how the king was defeated and Nesta beheaded him, with Nesta responding how he had it coming.

No shade to Nesta but she continues telling this story on repeat whenever it's brought up as if she did something brag worthy on her own when it's being conveniently left out that she owes Elain her own and Cassian's life. How seconds before Nesta beheaded him, Elain stopped him from killing them by putting a blade through his throat, making it possible for Nesta to behead him.

It's fine for them to claim Nesta stopped him from taking another breath but it's not fine for them to act like she did something dangerous or heroic or difficult. I used this metaphor before but it's like my husband taking a cake out of the oven once the timer goes off and him taking credit for baking it even though I spent 30 minutes mixing the ingredients and putting into the oven in the first place.

Nesta and Az don't even need to say "Elain" stabbed him if they're trying to avoid specifics but they could say, after someone stopped him from harming Nesta, she was able to finish him off but they both act as if it was really all Nesta's doing.

It's not that I hate Az or Nesta for this fact, I do acknowledge that SJM keeps pushing this narrative because she's trying to make the point that Elain isn't valued in the NC, that they either still try to protect her in a way that hinders her growth or they just can't admit to themselves that maybe she doesn't need them in the way they're desperate to be needed because being someones protector gives them a sense of self worth. But it's become almost comical how many times SJM has give their character chances to acknowledge the parts Elain played in the war yet neither does.

Also, I think it's clear Az is still salty about not having a mating bond, 7 months after the events of Solstice. To me, that doesn't mean he has feelings for Elain but wants his own mating bond, something that he in canon does not have with anyone that we know of. Which is fine, all the ACOTAR males had wanted a mating bond because they grew up realizing what a special thing it was. But I think anyone trying insist that he'd be happy with Elain knowing she has a bond with someone else is an argument they'll lose in the end. I think E/riel ended on Solstice but even if there was something still there, I believe he'd always wonder if his mate was out there somewhere and that's not the kind of setup that ends well for anyone.

My final thought is that the E/riel theory that Az's shadows work off "firstlight" is ridiculous considering the battery of Bryce's phone died and it was Az humming to himself that caused the shadows to dance. And the kind of music he preferred was what he called "pleasure hall" music to which Bryce replied "are you a club rat".

Music has never been a part of Elain's arc. She likes balls, for sure but I can almost bet that the dancing and music of a ball are much different than that of a pleasure hall. Does Gwyn like the pleasure hall scene? No clue but we do know that Nesta and Feyre mention Elain herself never frequented the bar scene. And it cannot be denied that SJM created a very obvious parallel between the end of his bonus in SF, what with Az's shadows singing in answer to Gwyn's singing and the end of the HOFAS bonus, with his shadows dancing along to his own humming.

I still don't think that means Az's books being next is a certainty. Music preferences and bitterness over a lack of a canon mating bond are still not relevant to where things left off in Silver Flames (the issues with Koschei, Beron, Spring, the treaty).

I think SJM is continuing to build up who Az is so that anyone who does read across her series will have a better idea of his character when it's time for his book, whether it's after Elucien or before, but that buildup continues putting him farther away from Elain and closer to Gwyn as his endgame.