#i think she was my favorite queen when i was a kid first reading the books

[watcherintheweyr]

i think your idea that viserys named naerys after rhaenyra it's so sweet, i'm crying it rare seeing such lovely post in this fandom especially about viserys since for some reason people say he hated his mother

do you have more ideas or headcanon like that? if you do i would love to know

People only think Voserys hated his mother bc they have poor critical thinking skills. He and Aegon mourned her their whole lives. She loved them and raised them to be phenomenal princes and kings. I don't particularly like Viserys II but I can't deny he's effective.

As for other similar headcanons... hmmm....

I think Rhaenyra and Daemon would've had more kids if they'd been able- and girls would've been names Visenya, Alyssa, and Aemma.

I think Rhaenyra specifically.picked Mornong's egg for Rhaena because the lovely pink and strong black made her think of her stepdaughter.

I think that while Baela and Rhaena obviously love and miss their mother and carry many of her traits, I think that while Baela is Daemon's mini-me, Rhaena is Rhaenyras. I've had that hc since the book- and in the show, Rhaena often matches her dresses to Rhaenyras, and from what we've seen of her in s2 she's started styling her hair similarly to how Rhaenyra did at her age, and appears to be wearing Rhaenyras gold necklace from her wedding (or a very similar one!)

Rhaena had six daughters with her second husband and I firmly believe that while Baela named her daughter Laena, Rhaena defied political niceties, and named one daughter Rhaenyra. And perhaps another daughter was named a feminine version of Lucerys- to honor her first betrothed, who she clearly had a good relationship with.

I think that Luke and Rhaena would have made a fantastic Lord and Lady of the Tides- and Baela and Jace would've been among the best rulers Westeros ever had.

I also will die on the hill that if she hadn't been so deeply sabotaged and destroyed by grief and betrayal, Rhaenyra would've been a solidly good queen.

I think that Cregan, Jace, and Baela would've been the OT3 to end all OT3s and I honestly think Cregan mightve considered staying south to be Jace's hand, if things had played out differently.

I definitely think Aegon3 wanted to name his sons for the brothers he lost, but was pressured out of it due to the political unrest. And honestly, sadly, I do think Viserys would've been the one to dissuade him, and that likely would've deeply damaged their relationship

I headcanon that every time Rhaenyra had a child, Syrax laid a clutch- their bond is shown to be so deep to the point that they share paim, and Rhaenyra shows a deep love and respect for Syrax. Honestly all of team Black show their dragons a lot of love and respect- unlike team Green who sort of just use their dragons as tools of war and naught else.

I think if things hadn't ended how they did, Aegon 3 would've claimed Grey Ghost. Their personalities suit one another so well! Rhaenyra would've been so proud, and Daemon would've helped him every step of the way. (Side note, @spreta-invidia wrote the Best aegon3 fic quite literally ever, and he and Grey Ghost... 👀 anyways you should read the fic)

Idk I have a lot of Targaryen headcanons, particularly for Rhaenyra and her family bc they're my favorites of House Targaryen. If you'd like any more feel free to shoot me another ask- but I tend to kinda error 404 when questions are vague so if there's anything specific you'd like to know my headcanons about that'd be super helpful lmao

[sinusoidaldisfunction]

Blister. Twisted Sister.

[pianokantzart]

YES! GOOD! I’m going to just going to analyze the whole dinner scene, because it’s one of my favorite parts of the movie. 

Mario and Luigi walk in, and immediately the whole room lights up to greet them. Despite everything that follows, one thing is clear: The Mario Brothers are happy to see their family, and the family is happy to see them. 

The whole family confirms that they watched their commercial. Everyone except their mom insists the commercial was a bad idea, but the fact that they all watched it speaks to the fact that there is no indifference regarding Mario and Luigi’s dream. They’re eager to see where this endeavor leads, even if they think it’s going to end in failure. 

The moment Mario and Luigi sit down at the table, their uncles begin laying into them like it’s open season on financially struggling plumbers. Just full blown, no-holds-barred roast mode on their nephews.

Mario is on the defensive, but he doesn’t get angry, he’s just trying to argue his side. Clearly this is typical behavior for Uncle Tony and Uncle Arthur. They’re loud, overly honest, and obnoxiously confident in their opinions. Uncle Arthur, thankfully, has his wife to keep him in check. Uncle Tony, however, who is seated next to poor Luigi, is an absolute menace.

Luigi ignores all the teasing. He is only interested in getting food, but this is not an easy task. Tony’s verbal arguments are all directed at Mario, but Luigi is the one who gets prodded and shoved around, and that makes getting dinner next to impossible.

Luigi attempts to serve himself salad, attempts to ask for a roll, attempts to eat the mushrooms being put on his plate, and at every turn he’s either pushed away or talked over. He is clearly very soft spoken compared to the other men in his family, and never quite had the strength to stand up for himself... after all, everyone means well, they just lack self awareness. It isn’t worth the fight. 

Thankfully, Luigi’s mom comes to the rescue, and puts a bowl of soup in front of her boy. She’s the queen of the caretaker role, making sure all the loose ends are tied up and that everybody eats.

But on the flip side, it’s interesting to note that once the uncles start tearing into Mario, Mario’s Dad serves him up a plate of food. He may have just been serving the person next to him because that was the polite thing to do, but I have a theory...

I think that this wasn’t the first night that Mario and his uncles went at each other. I think Mario’s Dad read the room, and figured that if Mario was going to spend dinner playing defense, he should at least remember to eat while doing so.

It also speaks volumes that Mario’s Dad doesn’t voice his disapproval until Mario asks for his opinion. Before then he avoids the subject and lets everyone else do the talking, but so long as he’s being questioned directly, he can’t help but be honest.

“I think... you’re nuts. You don’t quit a steady job for some crazy dream.” This sounds like a voice of experience. Mario’s Dad has the figure of someone who has worked physical labor for a good portion of his life (look the size of those arms). He may have had dreams of his own when he was younger, but he had a wife and kids to worry about, and family took priority. 

Speaking of family taking priority: “... and the worst part? You’re bringing your brother down with you.” That settles it. The conversation has gone from a casual roast session to dead serious. The entire room falls quiet as Mario puts down his fork and storms off. 

“What’d I say?” Everybody at the table (except the niece, she’s long since checked out) gives Mario’s Dad different versions of the look™. Uncle Tony and Uncle Arthur have the same “Jesus Christ bro, you didn’t have to go there” expression, and Luigi just looks hurt on Mario’s behalf. His Dad, however, is just confused.  

He didn’t get the gravity of what he said. His relationship with his own brothers– loudmouthed schmucks who call their own shots – is completely alien to what Luigi and Mario have. He probably knows Mario is protective of Luigi, but he doesn’t realize the depth of responsibility Mario feels for him. Anyone can see that Luigi is loyal to his brother, but Mario alone knows how loyal he is, and the implication that he’s betraying that loyalty is intensely painful. 

I doubt Uncle Arthur and Uncle Tony truly relate to Mario and Luigi’s relationship either, but they’ve probably teased Mario enough to understand one thing: bringing Luigi into it is a line you do not cross.

Conclusion:

There is a lot of love in the Mario family.

Uncle Tony and Uncle Arthur are definitely the most insufferable of the bunch, but there is no malice in their teasing. While they are brash and overbearing, it’s all in good fun, and they get visibly uncomfortable when things go too far and someone actually ends up hurt. 

Luigi seems to take after his mother; kind, nonconfrontational, and happily invested in a supporting role. While his Mom cares for and assists the family, Luigi cares for and assists his brother, both emotionally and in his business ventures.

Mario, in the meantime, takes after his Dad, who appears to be the oldest of the three brothers. He doesn’t always think before speaking, but he isn’t constantly running his mouth like Arthur or Tony, and acts with the gravity of someone who bears a lot of responsibility. He doesn’t quite “get” his sons, but he knows enough to see that Luigi follows his brother everywhere, and Mario does not always think before jumping into things. Despite what Mario may believe, his Dad doesn’t see him as a “joke” so much as he sees him as an impulsive young man who doesn’t grasp the consequences of his actions. But Mario does understand the consequences of his actions, he just dreams big, and... thanks to Luigi... actually has the support he needs to pursue those dreams. 

[andvys]

I knew you'd linger like a tattoo kiss | part 12

Warnings: angst, underage drinking, weed, mentions of other drugs, mentions of depression, slut shaming, attempted sexual assault, (reader being kissed, groped and being held forcefully), (she leaves before more can happen) if that makes you feel uncomfortable, you can stop reading this chapter after the moment with Eddie at his trailer!

Pairings: Steve Harrington x fem!cheerleader!reader, Steve Harrington x Nancy Wheeler, slight Eddie Munson x fem!reader (platonic)

Summary: You try to give dating a second chance and quickly come to regret it when you say yes to the wrong boy.

Word count: 9.5k

A/N: shoutout to my bestie @mysticmunson who always always helps me with the best ideas 🤍

series masterlist

-

You feel like time is moving faster than usual. One moment it was the new year and now it’s already the end of march and every day pushes you closer and closer to the last day of high school. You can’t believe that it’s almost over. 

You can’t believe how much has changed in the past six months. 

Had someone told you that you would be graduating without him, a year back, you wouldn’t have believed them. It’s always been you and Steve. No matter how awful he was to you, how badly he treated you, it’s always been you two together. 

You wanted to graduate with him, you wanted to go to college with him or even take a gap year and travel through the country with him – that was the plan. 

But you will graduate without him and you will go to college without him and you will travel without him – he won’t be by your side, he won’t ever be by your side again and you have come to terms with it. You are okay with it, now. 

“Hello?” Robin mumbles, waving her hand in front of your face. 

Blinking, you quirk your brow and look at your friend.

“Huh?”

Robin chuckles at the confused look on your face, she sips on her coffee and scoots closer to you on the bench, reaching for a brownie in the brown paper bag between you two. 

“What’s on your mind?” 

You take a sip of your coffee and avoid looking into her eyes. You’re not about to tell her that you are thinking about your ex boyfriend. 

She chews on her brownie and squints her eyes as she stares at you. 

“Just that I’m going to graduate soon,” you chuckle and look at the lake in front of you. You and Robin decided to spend the afternoon by the lake after getting your favorite treats from the cafe downtown. 

The sun is shining down on you, making your skin feel warm. The water is glistening and you cannot wait to jump into the lake when the weather gets even warmer. 

“Yeah, it’s unfair how you and I just became friends and now you’re already leaving!” 

You chuckle and nod at her words. 

“You should have become friends with Eddie a long time ago!” She mumbles, rolling her eyes, playfully. 

A smile tugs at your lips, “I agree.”

“We wouldn’t be here if it wasn’t for him.”

“You think?” You ask. 

She nods, her eyes widen, “yeah, I mean don’t get me wrong, you’re super nice and chill but cheerleaders make me nervous and there’s no way I would have ever approached you!”

And that is why she hasn't hung out with you and your friends yet. Despite you telling her how nice they are, she is still too nervous to get to know them properly. 

You can’t help but smirk at her, “why exactly do they make you feel nervous, Robin?” 

She narrows her eyes, glaring at you, which makes you laugh. 

You know that she is into girls, it’s something she has been worried about telling you, too afraid of your reaction. It also didn’t help that you had only known each other for a little while, she didn’t trust you at first but the more she got to know you, the more she realized that you aren’t like the other popular kids at school. You aren’t judgmental or rude or a bully – far from it. When she saw you standing up for Eddie in front of the whole cheer squad and the basketball team, she knew that you are a real friend, you risked your ‘queen’ status and your place in the popular crowd but you didn’t care. 

She didn’t plan on telling you, she blurted it out after having one too many drinks and when she was sober again, she was afraid of your reaction, all the what if’s ran through her mind – what if you will hate her? What if you will out her to the whole school? What if you will laugh and make her the laughing stock of the town? What if you will be disgusted by her? 

She was overthinking. You didn’t give her much of a reaction, in fact, you were chill as always and treated the subject of her sexuality like it was the most normal thing in the world when it definitely isn’t the most normal thing for other people. You went out for breakfast that day and you had asked her who the ‘lucky girl’ is when you found out about her crush, that’s all. 

And since then, you have only gotten closer and closer. 

She blushes at your question, there are two reasons why cheerleaders make her nervous – 1. They are popular and a little mean and 2. They are hot. 

“You know why,” she mumbles and takes a sip of coffee again. 

You giggle, “yeah, yeah. I get it, cheerleaders are hot.” 

“Eddie thinks so too,” she smirks. 

Now it’s your turn to glare at her, “shut up.”

“Oh come on! You tease me, I tease you back! That’s how friendships work, right?”

“Yes,” you say, “but there’s nothing to tease me about.”

She snorts and rolls her eyes, crossing her leg over the other, she leans back and looks up at the blue sky. 

“I saw you two together, lying beneath the starry sky and running around like two teenagers in love,” she says, dreamily. 

You know that she is talking about the bonfire last weekend. 

Shaking your head, you chuckle at her words and roll your eyes. 

“We’re just friends.”

“Friends who slap each other’s butts?” 

“Exactly.”

She looks down and faces you again, studying your face with a curious look in her eyes. She purses her lips and tilts her head. 

“Okay, seriously though, are you just friends or is there more between you two?” She asks, genuinely. Robin watches the way your brows furrow and the way confusion flashes in your eyes. For a split second, you look lost. 

You hesitate. 

“Yeah, just friends.”

She waits for you to continue, she can tell that you want to say more. 

“But, it’s like, he’s a special friend, you know?” 

Her eyes widen when she sees the flustered look on your face, she slaps your shoulder, “friends with benefits?” She gasps, loudly. 

Your jaw drops and your eyes widen as well, “no!” You almost scream, slapping her shoulder back, “you perv! Why is your mind going there?”

“You should’ve seen the look on your face!” Robin laughs, pushing your hand away. “You two are pretty touchy though so can you even blame me for asking that?”

No. No, you can’t blame her. 

Robin has walked in on you cuddling with Eddie way too many times. He casually takes your hand and intertwines your fingers together. He kisses your forehead, your temple, your cheeks, your hands. He picks you up and drives you home. You sleep in each other’s beds and go on ‘friends’ dates. But, you are friends. 

“I get what you mean,” you mumble. You know what your friendship with Eddie looks like to other people. Your mom thinks you’re dating and so does Steve’s mom and the rest of the town as it seems. “Eddie is very special to me and I love him but differently, not the way I loved him.” You shrug, looking down at your hands. You touch the rings that he gave you. “Things with Eddie just feel natural and good and I feel so safe with him, you know? I-I feel like he was a missing piece in my life because when he walked in, everything just felt better and it’s nice to know that he doesn’t expect anything from me, that what we have now, is enough.” 

Robin’s eyes soften. 

“We can just be together, you know?” 

She smiles at your words. 

“And us being so touchy is just,” you pause, looking for the right word. “Fun? I think we both craved the intimacy and the touch of another person. I never got it from Steve.” 

“Really?”

“Yeah, he always pushed me away. He hated cuddling, he never held me, he hated holding my hand. His kisses were rough and he always pushed me away after we had.. sex.”

She frowns. She isn’t surprised to hear about how awful he was to you but it upsets her, you deserve better. 

“What a jerk.”

“Yeah,” you laugh, shaking your head. “I was pretty messed up when he dumped me, I felt miserable and I was so fucking depressed. I shouldn’t have been, he treated me like shit but I still loved him and I still wanted him and if he came back right away, I would’ve definitely taken him back,” you snort, feeling embarrassed to admit that. “But Eddie came into my life and he was just there, he showed me that I didn’t need him. He showed me that friendships and finding other things that make you happy can be enough.”

Robin can tell that there is more behind your words. Nothing will ever replace the hole that someone you loved so much had left in your heart.

“Eddie makes me happy and I just love what we have. He is not like my other friends but he is not like a boyfriend either. I-I can’t explain it.”

Robin sighs but she smiles at you, “maybe you’re soulmates – platonic soulmates!” 

You raise your brows and laugh. 

“I’m sorry if you don’t believe in that stuff but I’m a total believer when it comes to soulmates and twin flames and whatnot.”

“Me too, Robin.”

“Cool,” she grins. 

“Yeah, cool.” You laugh, wiggling your brows, “now we gotta find your platonic soulmate.”

“Ugh,” she rolls her eyes, “they probably don’t exist.”

“Oh, I’m sure they exist,” you say, “I’m sure they’re around here. Maybe both of them are! Your platonic and romantic soulmate.” You smile. 

“I don’t believe that,” she says, blushing. 

“But I do. I got a sneaky feeling that you might find them both soon,” you say, not knowing that there is the actual truth behind your words. 

You look at the lake in front of you, your mind tries to take you back to all your moments here with him but you force yourself to think of something else, someone else, anything that will stop you from thinking about him. 

“Hey,” you nudge her shoulder, “can I ask you something?”

“Of course.”

You hesitate again, not knowing whether it’s worth bringing it up or not. 

“So uh, last weekend, at the bonfire, this guy asked me out on a date. He called me earlier today and asked if I wanna go out with him tomorrow night but I said that I’m not sure, he sounded disappointed and told me to think about it and that he will wait for my call and now I don’t know what to do.”

“Oh?” 

��Yeah,” you mumble, “he used to go to our school, his name is Ray.”

“Okay,” she says, slowly, “why are you not sure?”

You shrug, “I don’t know if I wanna go out with him.”

She wants to ask who you really want to go out with but she doesn’t. 

“You’re not into him?” Robin asks, her blue eyes are filled with curiosity. 

“I mean, he’s hot but I don’t really wanna date anyone right now and I don’t want to have sex.” 

Robin scrunches her face up, looking a little confused. 

“You don’t have to have sex with him and you don’t have to date him.”

“Yeah but they always want sex,” you mumble. 

Disgust flashes in her eyes and she shudders, “do they?”

“Yeah, same with Steve.”

“Seriously?”

“Yeah, I mean we have known each other our whole lives so maybe it’s not that serious when it comes to him but we had sex on our first date,” you pause, rolling your eyes, “and every girl I talk to tells me that every guy expects to get laid on a first date so..”

“Gross,” she says, sipping on her coffee. 

“Yeah.”

“But you don’t have to do anything if you don’t want to. A date can be fun, you can just get to know each other and see if you hit it off, you can laugh together and flirt, do something fun that doesn’t involve kissing or fucking! And a person who is looking for a partner or even just for a companion, won’t want to fuck on a first date,” she says without thinking about her words. 

You don’t know why her words hurt, you don’t hang onto him anymore but to think that he never wanted to date you, that he only wanted to fuck you cuts you deep. Was that all you were good for, sex? Is that why he kept you around, so he could fuck you and take his frustrations out on you? Is that why it was so easy for him to dump you? When he found out that he could have both love & sex, he realized that you were no longer useful to him? 

And it’s not just Steve who made you feel that way, there’s plenty of guys who have tried to get in your pants, before, during and after your relationship with him. Billy Hargrove has to be the worst of them all. 

Her words lingered for the rest of the day, you know that she didn’t mean any harm but it brought back questions that you have always avoided to think about when you were still with him. 

She didn’t notice the sad look in your eyes, too busy trying to convince you to go on a date and have some ‘innocent fun’. You agreed with her, maybe it’s what you really need, some innocent fun. 

You went home after dropping her off, you cleaned your room and you took a long shower, contemplating whether to call or not call him. You tried reading a book but you kept looking at the telephone. 

A part of you wanted to go on that date, the other part was just curious to see how it would all play out. 

In the end, you called him and said yes to the date, he seemed excited and that put a smile on your face but you couldn’t help but feel the hesitation of going out with a guy you are not even that interested in. You had a weird feeling in your chest and in your stomach. 

Something felt off, something felt wrong, very wrong. 

But you were never good at listening to your gut. 

You were good at overthinking though and your mind kept taking you back to him and you couldn’t stand it, you needed a distraction. That’s how you ended up here, on Eddie’s bed with a joint between your lips and a lazy smile on your face. 

The room smells like weed, the cinnamon candle that you have put on his desk and him. The faint sound of some rock song fills the silence, surprisingly he keeps his music on the low today. Eddie is sitting on his chair, writing something in his notebook, something he won’t let you see. His brows are furrowed, lips tucked beneath his teeth, he looks concentrated. 

“What are you writing, Eddie?” You ask, pushing yourself up on your knees, offering him the joint. Instead of taking it from your fingers, he leans closer to you and parts his lips. 

You chuckle and place it between his lips. 

He looks into your eyes, amusement flashes in them when he notices you biting your lip. He takes a drag and closes his eyes for a moment as he inhales. You watch him and remove the joint. You lick your lips, pulling away from him to place the joint in the ashtray on his nightstand. 

Your mind feels hazy, maybe a little too hazy but this is exactly what you wanted. 

Eddie blows the smoke into the air and leans back again, he studies your face. Right now, you look calm and relaxed but you looked tense and worried when you got here, he wonders why. 

“So?” You ask, still waiting for an answer. 

He scratches the back of his neck, his eyes shift away from you, he glances down at his noteback before his eyes meet yours again, “it’s a secret, sweetheart,” he winks.

“Eddie,” you whine, rolling your eyes, “I thought we don’t keep secrets from each other.”

You know it’s nothing serious so you don’t get upset, you could never be upset with him. 

“It’s not exactly a secret, just something I don’t want to show you yet,” he says, smiling. 

“Oh?” 

“Mhmm.”

“Well then, I can relax,” you giggle and lie back again. 

Eddie chuckles, shaking his head. He looks back down at his notebook, holding his pen tighter. He looks at the words on the white paper, tilting his head. His eyes flicker back and forth, looking at you and at the unfinished text.

You hum along to the song playing in the background, tapping your fingers against the mattress. You look around his room, eyeing every item as though it’s your first time in here. Your eyes get stuck on the handcuffs adorning the wall. A curious look takes over your face. You have asked him about them before and you felt slightly disappointed when you found out that those aren’t from him being arrested and running away, these are just handcuffs he stole from the equipment at the theater room in school. 

You reach for the joint and take a long drag, letting the smoke invade your lungs slowly. You sit up, still eying the handcuffs. 

Eddie wonders what you are thinking about. He puts the notebook down, propping his elbow against the table as he watches you, curiously. 

“You know what I always wondered?”

“What?” He asks. 

“What it’s like to be a criminal,” you say, giggling. 

He raises his brows in surprise, clearly not expecting this. 

“I kinda wanna know what it’s like to get arrested forcefully, being thrown to the ground and getting handcuffed like in those action movies,” you say as you tilt your head, “I wouldn’t mind getting arrested by Jim Hopper, he’s so hot,” you giggle. 

Eddie can’t help but laugh. You aren’t just joking about being cuffed, you are genuinely curious and he is amused by it. An idea crosses his mind and it doesn’t take him long to get into action, he gets up and walks over to the handcuffs, taking them off the wall, he looks at you with a smirk on his face. 

“You wanna know what it’s like to be cuffed?” He asks as he holds them in front of your face. 

You eye the mischievous look in his eyes, knowing that he has something on his mind, something that has got to do with him cuffing you and you can’t help but feel excitement rushing through you. 

You nod eagerly and it only makes him chuckle even more. 

“You wanna feel like a little criminal and have a cop running after you?” He asks as he bends down, leaning closer to you until his face is directly in front of yours. 

You nod.

“Good cop or bad cop?” 

“Bad cop,” you say, biting your lip. 

He chuckles darkly, he eyes you up and down before he leans closer, he brushes your hair back, his breath hits the exposed skin on your shoulder, his fingertips linger on your skin, “well then, you better run, sweetheart,” he whispers. 

He pulls back and your eyes lock with his again, he is serious about this, you can tell by the look on his face. 

For a moment, you are both silent, both waiting for the other to move. The music is still playing but the room is more silent than ever. Suddenly, Eddie lunges at you and a squeal falls from your lips, you manage to dodge his hands and jump back before he gets ahold of you. You put distance between you and him, crawling back and getting up on the other side of the bed. 

“Ma’am you are under arrest!” Eddie says with a deep voice and a mean look on his face. 

You laugh, loudly but Eddie doesn’t look amused at all. 

“Put your hands behind your back!” 

“What am I under arrest for, officer?” You ask, blinking innocently. 

Eddie frowns, he steps around the bed, trying to get closer to you. 

“That’s chief Munson to you, little lady,” he glares at you, still talking in a deep voice, “and you’re under arrest for being a bad girl.”

You raise your hand towards your lips and laugh. He tries to look mean but his eyes are filled with amusement. He steps even closer but before he can get too close, you get back on the bed and crawl over to the other side. Eddie instantly follows you. Your heartbeat picks up and you slam open the door before you run out into the hallway. 

“Hey!” 

You squeal when you hear him running after you. 

“Get back here, you little shit!” Eddie yells, snorting when he trips over Wayne’s slippers. 

You run into the living room, stopping behind the table by the couch. You are a giggling mess and Eddie thinks it’s cute, he can’t help but smile as he tries to keep the frown on his face. 

“Please chief, don’t arrest me!” You say with a fake whiney voice, “I’ll be a good girl.”

Eddie smirks, “that’s how you talk to the chief?” 

“Yeah,” you say, wiggling your brows. 

The handcuffs in his hands jingle as he flicks them back and forth, walking closer and closer to you which makes you step closer to the couch. 

“You’re only making it worse for yourself, just stay where you are,” he orders, giving you a pointed look. 

“Or what?”

He quirks a brow, grinning at you, “or I’ll have to punish you.”

“Aw, I’m so scared.”

Eddie runs forward and reaches his hand out to grab you but you are quicker than him, laughing loudly when you run away again, bolting back to his room but you don’t expect him to catch you so quickly. Suddenly, his arms are wrapped around your waist, he hooks his leg around yours, bringing you down but making sure that you hit the carpet softly, a surprised gasp escapes your lips, in just under ten seconds he has you pinned beneath his body, holding you against the ground.

You struggle against him but he is stronger than you, he presses your front against the floor and holds your hands behind your back, he straddles you from behind as he puts the cold metal around your wrists, cuffing you. 

“Got ya,” he whispers in your ear, chuckling. 

“Eddie!” You whine, still struggling against him as you try to fight him off. 

You can’t see him but you know that he has a smug look on his face. 

“Y/n!” He mocks you. 

He keeps holding you down, laughing at the way you are struggling and wiggling around. He smirks in satisfaction, “I wish I could take a picture of this,” he jokes as he stares at you and at the way you look beneath him with the handcuffs around your wrists. 

“You perv!” You laugh. 

Your movements cause your skirt to ride up a little and you don’t notice that you accidentally put your panties on display. 

Eddie smirks, ignoring the way his cheeks heat up and the way his stomach flutters.

“Cute polka dot undies, babe. I bet Harrington busted in his pants when he saw these,” he chuckles, staring at your ass. 

You are too high out of your mind to be embarrassed about anything, right now. You finally stop wiggling around, you crane your neck to the side, trying to look at him, “I usually didn’t wear any when we were together.” 

He laughs in surprise, “okay slut,” he jokes causing you to erupt into a fit of giggles. He tugs at the hem of your skirt, putting it back into place, he then looks away, clearing his throat, he gets up and adjusts his pants before he leans down, uncomfortably. Grabbing your waist, he picks you up, laughing at the way you squeal before he puts you back on your feet. He grabs the cuffs, “let’s get back in the cell, little criminal,” he whispers, pushing you through the hallway and back into his room.

You are still a giggling mess when he takes the cuffs off of you and puts them back on the wall. You plop down on the bed and lie down.

“Tell me, are you gonna wear these cute panties for Parker?” He teases you, narrowing his eyes to watch your reaction. Your eyes widen, you sit back up and straighten your back, looking like a deer caught in headlights. 

“W-What? How do you know?” You ask in confusion. 

He chuckles, turning back to face you, he walks towards you, crouching down in front of you. 

“Robin told me that you might want to go on a date with him, I kinda figured you would,” he shrugs. 

Eddie hates the idea of you going out with him. Ray is a jock and from his experience, 99% of the jocks are complete assholes, disrespectful to girls and generally, awful human beings. You dated one before, you don’t need another one to hurt you but he isn’t about to tell you what to do or not do – he should have. 

You blink, looking nervous all of the sudden, you look hesitant and that puts a frown on his face.

“What’s wrong?” He asks, taking your hands in his, trying to comfort you. 

“I think I made a mistake,” you admit as all the happiness and amusement on your face vanishes, “I-I shouldn’t have said yes to the date.”

You look anxious and that makes him anxious too.

“I don’t think that I’m ready.”

His brown eyes soften, he grips your hands tighter. Eddie thinks that you will never be ready to date anyone else – Steve Harrington is the one and only for you. You may think that you have moved on but he knows that you haven’t, he can still see the love in your eyes when you look at him. You aren’t aware of it and neither is he. 

Eddie clears his throat, trying to say something but you interrupt him. Pinching your nose, you shake your head. 

“I-I don’t even want a boyfriend, right now – let alone another jock! I don’t want to fuck him either, what was I thinking?”

A part of him wants to encourage you to cancel the date, a huge part of him wants to do that, the part that is very protective of you but he doesn’t do it. 

“Sweetheart,” Eddie sighs as he sits down beside you, still holding your hand, “you don’t have to date him or fuck him. And a part of you must’ve wanted to go on that date, otherwise you wouldn’t have said yes, right?” 

“I guess,” you shrug. 

The truth is, you want to know what it’s like to go out with someone who wants you. 

“I’m sure Robin told you that already but you can just go out and have fun, you don’t have to do anything you don’t want to do. If the date goes well then great but if he turns out to be an asshole then you can just give him the mean right hook you gave Billy and then you’ll call me, I’ll pick you up and kick his ass and then we’re gonna go to family video, rent some movies and binge on our favorite snacks.”

And just like that, the smile on your face returns and Eddie’s eyes light up. 

“The campaign is tomorrow,” you point out. 

He shrugs, “for you, I’ll cancel any campaign,” he winks and wraps his arm around you, pulling you into his chest. 

You smile and snuggle closer to him, “you’re the best, Eddie.”

“No, you are.” He kisses the top of your head and runs his fingers through your hair, “you know what?”

“Hmm?”

“I’m gonna miss this if you get a boyfriend,” he admits when you both lie down and he pulls you on top of him, “shit, I got used to cuddling you, I need my little spoon.”

You giggle into his chest, “I need my big spoon too.” You place your palm on his chest, propping your chin on the top of your hand, you look into his eyes. “I’m not gonna have a boyfriend anytime soon but you might get a girlfriend,” you whisper, tapping his nose, making him smile.

“Nah,” he mumbles, scrunching his nose up, his eyes shift away for a second, “I don’t think so, I just wanna focus on my music and my friends,” he says, squeezing your waist.

You nod. 

“I get that. I feel the same way, I just wanna focus on myself a-and be by myself.” 

He smiles, he continues to play with your hair, watching you as you reach for his necklace, eyeing the guitar pick. 

“We should just stay single together,” he jokes. 

“I actually love the idea.”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah,” you chuckle. 

“I’ll still kick Parker’s ass if you need me to,” Eddie says after a moment of silence, making you laugh again. “I hope that you will have a good time though, sweetheart.”

You hope so too. 

You hoped so but at that time you did not know yet that the next night would end up a nightmare. That you would have tears streaming down your face, regretting that you had ever said yes to him. 

-

It’s been a long time since you had been out on a date, you forgot what it’s like to feel the excitement but also the anxiety of going on a first date again. The not knowing of how the night will turn out made you a little nervous. You didn’t know what he had planned and where he would take you but you spent all day picking out an outfit, trying on all your dresses, all your skirts, combining your jeans with your favorite tops. You hated every option, every single outfit felt wrong, even your favorite clothes didn’t feel right on you – you should have taken that as a sign to cancel the date, you should have. 

In the end, you settled for a blue sundress, pairing it with your favorite shoes and a denim jacket. You braided the front pieces of your hair and did your make up and finished it up with some pink gloss on your lips. 

A part of you kept telling you to cancel the date, to call him and say that you had changed your mind but the other part kept telling you that the doubt and the awful feeling that had settled in the pit of your stomach was because you were overthinking things, because you weren’t ready to go out with someone else. 

You sat on your bed and stared at the wall, bouncing your knee up and down as you fought a war in your mind, you had no time to change your mind though, the doorbell rang too soon for your liking. 

You felt some of the tension leaving your body when he greeted you with his cute smile and your favorite flowers, you were surprised, you only briefly mentioned what flowers you love the most in your way too short conversation at the bonfire, last week. 

He looked excited and that put your mind at ease, a little.

He was a gentleman, he opened the car door for you and asked you how your day had been, he easily made you laugh. There was no awkwardness in the air, none at all. For the first thirty minutes, you were still a little tense though, your heart was pounding, you were nervous but he was great. 

The ice broke when The Cure started playing and you found something you have in common, you started talking about your favorite bands. You forgot how nervous you felt, you even forgot how wrong it had felt to go out with him, you forgot the weird feeling in your stomach, for a moment, you forgot everything. You shouldn’t have. 

He was respectful and nice all night, he didn’t touch you the way you thought he would. The most he did was offer you his hand or put it on the small of your back. He didn’t put his hand on your thigh when you were at the movies, not the way Steve did on your first date. He didn’t try to kiss you during the movie, he didn’t try anything. He kept making you laugh and it was nice, he made you feel comfortable and that led to you letting your guard down. 

For the first time, you had felt like a guy was genuinely interested in you. 

After the movies, you went to get some drinks and things were going great, too great. The part that kept screaming at you all day was back and screaming even louder but you drowned that voice out and you focused on him and how interested he seemed in you. 

Was luck on your side this time? 

But every good moment has to end and now the moment has come and it brings you here. 

You are walking down the sidewalk with your hand in his as you discuss the movie you saw earlier tonight. 

“There is no way you still think that Halloween is better than Friday the 13th!” 

“I do!” You shrug, giggling. “I think it’s the best movie.”

He shakes his head, chuckling, “I think you gotta see more movies.”

“Oh, I watch plenty of movies and I love horror but Halloween is still my favorite.”

“It’s hardly even a horror movie, honey.”

The pet name makes your smile falter a little.

“It’s good though.”

You stop in front of his car and you both turn to face each other, he places his hand on the roof of his car and you watch the way he eyes you up and down, the way his eyes linger on your chest, the way he licks his lips and smirks when his eyes meet yours again. 

You have to crane your neck to look up at him, he is tall, even taller than Steve. His hair is dark blonde and his eyes are blue, he has a look in his eyes that Steve doesn’t have, you don’t know whether it’s a good sign or not. His hair falls in front of his eyes. 

He is handsome but he isn’t him. 

You feel shy beneath his gaze, something his demeanor has changed in the past few minutes.

“Tell me,” he says as he leans closer to you, “which girl are you in a horror movie, the one that gets killed having sex or the innocent little girl turning into a killer?”

Maybe that should have made you turn on your heel and run but instead, you giggle at his question with a confused look on your face. 

You shrug, “I don’t know. Who are you? The jock that gets killed when the popular girl fucks him or the unassuming guy who turns out to be the slasher?” 

He chuckles darkly, “why don’t you find out?” He jokes as he unlocks the car and opens the door for you. 

You laugh, “sure, why not.”

The night is over and you can’t help but feel relieved, the date went great and you are happy about that, at least, you can go to bed knowing that there are guys who still just want to get to know you, without wanting something from you. 

Eddie is one of those guys too, he just wants to be around you but he is just a friend, nothing more. 

The small smile that lingered on your lips slowly disappears when he drives past the street that leads to your house. You glance at him, swallowing nervously. 

“That’s not the way to my house.”

He tilts his head, narrowing his eyes at you with a smile, “oh I know, the night isn’t over yet,” he winks and looks back, gripping the steering wheel with one hand and letting his other hand linger close to you. 

There is nothing bad about what he said but you feel your heart dropping and a shiver running down your spine, still, you try to stay calm. You take a deep breath and look out the window, watching the passing trees. 

This can still have a good ending, right?

He drums his fingers against the steering wheel.

“Everything okay?”

You force a smile on your face and nod, “mhm.”

He is making sure that you are okay, that must be a good sign, right? 

The wooded area he was driving through, already gave you all the signs where he is taking you, you are still surprised when he parks the car at Lovers Lake. 

“You’re not actually the unassuming slasher are you?” You joke when you stare at the dark lake in front of you. 

He chuckles at your question, he turns off the car and unbuckles his seatbelt. You do the same, thinking that he wants to leave the car. 

“Are we going skinny dipping?” You ask, laughing as you reach for the door handle but before you can open it, he reaches out, cupping your face with his large hands and pulling you into him, he smashes his lips against yours, catching you off guard a little. 

Your heart beats faster and you gasp against him, you did not expect this. He pulls you even closer against him, kissing you desperately.

It feels wrong, so so wrong.

But you decide to try it out, to see what it’s like to kiss someone else. You place your hand on his cheek, you close your eyes and you kiss him back. 

He hums in satisfaction, his thumb lingers on your cheekbone, his lips move softly against yours. It's nice, at first, but then it gets rougher and faster. 

You can taste the coke and the rum on his lips, you can smell his expensive cologne on him, you can feel how rough he is and you can still feel how he’s pulling back, he wants more and it makes the pit in your stomach grow bigger. 

Disappointment is all you feel now, of course it had to go this way. 

His hands move down to your shoulders and he deepens the kiss, slipping his tongue past your lips, you can feel him smirking against you when you whimper – not from pleasure but from the discomfort of the forceful kiss, you don't know why you keep going, you don’t know why you keep kissing him when you can already tell where is he is trying to take this. He pushes your jacket down along with the straps of your dress and then he breaks the kiss, smirking at you when you gasp at the roughness of his hands as he pulls you closer against him, you can’t keep up with his quick movements. Before you can react, he pushes your hair back and buries his face in your neck, not wasting a second to start kissing and sucking on your neck, it hurts.

You scrunch your face up, hissing when you feel his teeth gracing your skin.

“Ray.”

“I’m gonna fuck you so hard.” 

You shudder in disgust and tilt your head, trying to move back, scooting away, only for him to pull you back. When you feel his hands gripping your sides tightly, you feel your stomach dropping, you freeze when you realize what this night is turning into.

“Stop it,” you warn him with a shaky voice, your heart is pounding in your chest and everything inside of you screams at you to get out of here.

“Where do you think you’re going?” He asks as he suddenly grabs your thigh, trying to push his hand under your dress, “come on, don’t be such a prude, y/n. We both know you want this. I saw the way you looked at me.”

His words make you feel sick, the nausea rises up quickly and you feel like throwing up. 

“No! Stop it, Ray!” You say louder as a mix of anger and fear rushes through you, “I don’t want this!”

The fear inside of you doesn’t know how to handle the situation but the anger does. You grab his hair and pull him away from you, ripping his hand away with your other hand. 

“I said no, asshole!” You spit and slap him harshly across the face with the back of your hand, knowing that the rings that Eddie gave you will leave marks on his skin. 

His eyes darken at your action, he clenches his jaw and his cheeks grow red, you see the anger and rage behind his eyes and it scares you. With shaky hands, you rip the door open and get out of the car. You need to get out of here, you need to get away from him. 

Luck is never on your side. 

You feel like a fool for thinking that he was just interested in you. Of course, he wanted more, of course he wanted this from you. What else could he possibly want from you? 

You feel your heart in your throat and the regret and fear in you is so strong, you don’t know whether to scream or cry when you hear him getting out of his car. Your first instinct is to run but he grabs your waist and drags you back. You can’t even fight him off, he is much bigger and stronger than you are. He slams you against the car and pins your wrists against it, holding them tightly, too tightly. 

“Let me go!” You yell, struggling against the grip he has around your wrists.

He shakes his head, laughing. 

“I told you, I don’t want this! I don’t want to have sex with you so let me go or–”

“Or what?” He chuckles, “you’re not gonna do shit. You can’t tell me you didn’t wear this for me,” he says, tugging at your dress before he lets go of your wrist and grabs your face instead, “and the way you looked at me at the bonfire? You gave me those eyes, babe. I knew you wanted to be fucked.”

You shake your head, you press yourself against the car, desperately needing some distance between you and him. 

“I didn’t, I thought you were nice.”

“Aw,” he pouts but even in the darkness, you can see the amusement in his eyes, “you thought I was nice? You thought I wanted to take you out on a cute little date, kiss you on your porch and ask you to be my girlfriend?”

No but you certainly didn’t want this. The guy he was earlier, is gone, he dropped the act and is now showing you the side you are afraid of.

“If I wanted a girlfriend, I wouldn’t have asked you out,” he says, chuckling, “you think I was interested in you?” 

You don’t answer him, you just continue to stare at him. 

“Jesus,” he sighs, “you’re so fucking dumb.”

Your lips part and your brows furrow, you feel like punching him but you also feel like crying, this is a nightmare. 

“What would I want with a stupid little bitch like you?” He laughs and he finally lets go of you, taking a step back. 

You feel relieved to no longer feel his hands on you but your heart is still pounding and you feel cold.

“I took you out and listened to the shit you were telling me about, the least you could do was let me fuck you after teasing me all night.”

You blink, staring at him in disbelief. 

“Let me tell you something, y/n,” he says, tilting his head. 

You should have walked away, you shouldn’t have let him speak, you shouldn’t have listened to him, you should’ve left. 

But you stand frozen in place, you are blinking, your eyes are wet with tears.

“You are so fucking boring. You’re just a dumb little cheerleader with no fucking personality. The only good thing you have is your pretty face and your body – you should be thankful for that, by the way,” he says, pointing at you, “you’re a good fuck and that’s all you’ll ever be, that’s why Harrington dumped you, you’re not fucking interesting enough to keep around.”

Somehow, he knew which words he had to use to hurt you. 

You know that you were never good enough for him, you know that he didn’t love you, you know that he turned away from you because he found something better, something real. 

You feel like a fool for thinking that someone could want you for more than this. 

Ray had voiced everything that has been on your mind already. 

“Oh and that Munson guy you hang out with? He’ll drop you too the moment you spread your legs for him — that’s probably why he’s still around, he’s just waiting for you to whore yourself out to him.”

You want to scream at him, you want to hurt him back but you don’t feel the power to actually fight back. 

You stare at him through your blurry vision, breathing heavily as you clench your fists. You can feel yourself wanting to cry but you would never give him the satisfaction and show him how hurt you are. You turn on your heel and walk away, pulling the strap of your dress and your jacket back in place. 

“Where are you going?” He asks, making you scoff in disbelief.

You flip him off without looking back, “fuck you!”

You don’t know where to go, you don’t know how to get home from here, it’s too dark to even see anything but you would rather get lost in the woods than get back in his car. You choose to walk down the dark path, refusing to get back on the road where he will drive by.

You refuse to let the tears fall, you blink rapidly, tugging your jacket tighter around you as you strut through the woods. You feel disgusted and angry, you regret this, you regret everything. 

You hate yourself for going out with him, you hate yourself for kissing him back, you hate yourself for letting his words get to you. You wipe away the tear that threatened to roll down your cheek. 

You were doing so good. You were happy. You were content with the way things were going. Why did you have to say yes to the date? Why did you have to ruin everything? His words have triggered something inside of you, something you had tried to leave in the past. 

That’s why Harrington dumped you. That’s why Harrington dumped you. That’s why Harrington dumped you. 

I’m not in love with you anymore.

Did you really think that I meant that?

I didn’t, I-I’m not even sure if I ever loved you, y/n. I wouldn’t have fallen for her if I did love you, right?

I mean, it wasn’t love.

Well, he wasn’t in love with her– I mean, he dated her because that was expected of him, right? She’s the popular cheerleader, the pretty rich girl, those have nothing in their brains and they’re pretty boring too so.. It was all just for show, I-I mean, do you really think he wanted her for her?

The voices in your head get louder and louder, overpowering the other. You can’t do this anymore, you can’t. You halt in your tracks, you put your hands over your ears, shaking your head. 

A hand on your shoulder pulls you out of your thoughts, startling you. A gasp falls from your lips and you jump back with wide eyes, only now realizing that you are not on the dark path any longer. The street lights illuminate the street ahead of you, you recognize the boat houses. 

“Whoa, relax, girly. It’s just me.”

You press your palm against your chest and sigh, it takes you a moment to recognize the lanky guy in front of you. 

Reefer Rick. 

Eddie’s supplier. 

“You scared me,” you mumble, rolling your eyes. You relax as you continue to take deep breaths.

The smell of weed invades your space and you glance back at him, noticing the joint between his lips. 

“Sorry, kid. What’re you doing out here by yourself?” He asks, smoking his joint. 

“Walking.”

“Walking in a dress?”

You look down at yourself with a frown, “what’s wrong with walking in a dress?”

“Nothin’,” he laughs, clearly stoned out of his mind, “I wouldn’t want to walk in a dress.”

“Okay..”

He points to his house, “I’m throwing a party, wanna come inside? I got some new stuff to try out.”

New stuff – new drugs. You don’t take drugs, except for the occasional joints you smoke with Eddie but that’s all. 

You should go home right now but the thought of being alone with your thoughts seems too much after the night you had and you want to forget, forget everything that happened. 

You hesitate though, you promised Eddie that you would never go to one of Rick’s parties by yourself, he made you promise, claiming that he doesn’t trust the people that Rick surrounds himself with. 

Normally, you wouldn’t do this but tonight, you don’t care about the promises that you have made. You need a drink or maybe even something stronger. 

“Okay.”

-

After a long and exhausting campaign, Eddie wanted nothing more than to go home, call you to ask how the date had gone and then go straight into bed but he had promised Rick to drop by and pick up the new supplies. 

He parks the car on the side of the road, sighing when he sees all the cars in his driveway, the people on his porch. 

Eddie hates parties, especially Rick’s parties, too many crazy people in one house. He walks into the boathouse, wincing at the music – not at the volume but at the awful song choice. He looks around, looking for his supplier. 

“Aye Munson!” 

He perks up when he hears Rick’s voice, he cranes his neck, looking over a group of girls. He waves his hand in front of his face when someone blows smoke directly into his face as he makes his way over to him. 

He is too tired for this tonight and quite frankly, he isn’t in the mood to be here. He wants to check on you. A weird feeling in his stomach had kept him from enjoying the night with the boys from hellfire tonight, it triggered a headache too. 

“There you are!” Rick grins and throws his arm around Eddie, “how’s it going?” 

“Good,” Eddie mumbles. 

Over the loud music, he hears a girl’s giggle and he could swear it sounded like you. 

“Listen uh, you got the stuff?” Eddie asks. 

“You don’t wanna stick around?” Rick asks, frowning.

“Nah man, I’m tired. Maybe next time.”

Rick sighs, he runs his hand through his messy hair, sticking his joint back between his lips.

“Alright, I’ll get your stuff, wait here.” 

Eddie nods. He puts his hands into his pockets, he looks around. A cloud of smoke hangs over the living room, the smell of weed and alcohol is heavy in the air. Most people here are strangers to Eddie, he wonders where Rick finds these people. 

He looks over at the people dancing, snorting at the couple making out in the middle of the dance floor, the group of girls that are laughing and singing along to the music don’t seem to bother them as they continue to bump into them. He looks away but then his eyes catch sight of something that makes him freeze in his spot. He has to take a double look to make sure that his eyes aren’t playing tricks on him. 

Amongst the girls he had never seen, is you. 

“What the hell,” Eddie mumbles, confused. 

You have glitter on your face, your eyes are red, he can even tell from a distance. You are giggling loudly, letting one of the girls twirl you around as she holds your hand over your head. 

You are either drunk or on drugs. 

“You gotta be kidding me,” he mumbles through gritted teeth. 

What are you doing here and where is your date? 

He is not happy to see you here. This is not a good place. 

Angrily, he stomps over to you, pushing past the people who are on the dancefloor next to you. He calls your name loudly and watches the way your bloodshot eyes widen when you see him. You pull away from the girls, stumbling on your feet, a little. 

“Eddie!” You squeal and run towards him, throwing your arms around him. “What are you doing here!”

He smells the whiskey and the weed on you, right away and it pisses him off. 

“What am I doing here?” He asks as he pushes you away from him, carefully. “What are you doing here?” 

He watches the way your face drops, the way your lips set in a pout at the tone in his voice. 

“I told you not to come here by yourself! Where is your date?” He asks, too angry to notice anything, too angry to notice the look in your eyes, too angry and worried to see the marks on the side of your neck or the red and purplish bruises around your wrists. 

You fall into a ramble, giving him nothing but incoherent words. You blink rapidly, your voice is shaky, he doesn’t understand a single word and he can tell that you are starting to hyperventilate as the happiness and the bliss begins to fade away more and more.

He puts his arm around you and leads you out on the porch, where it’s more quiet, he sits you down on the steps and puts his hands on your shoulders.

“Sweetheart, you need to calm down,” he says when your rambling causes you to breathe faster.

“I-I, yeah.” Is all you say as you rub your eyes, not caring about your make up. 

“What did you take?” He asks, thinking that it’s the drugs that are messing with you. 

“Just weed and w-whiskey,” you slur.

He sighs, pinching the bridge of his nose, “you’re here alone?”

You nod. 

“Jesus Christ, y/n,” he murmurs, “I told you not to come here! Do you ever listen?” 

He doesn’t notice the way you flinch at his words, the way you look at him with glossy eyes as you search for the usual warmth in his eyes. 

“I’m gonna get you some water and then I’ll drive you home, okay?” 

“Okay,” you whisper.

He gets up, he looks down at you, your eyes lock and he notices the way you look at him, like a scolded child, big eyes that are filled with sadness and guilt, pouty, quivering lips. His eyes soften but he is still so angry, he sighs and turns away and walks back into the house.

He is angry that you didn’t listen, he is angry because he doesn’t know what would happen if he didn’t show up here tonight. 

But he doesn’t know what had already happened. 

When he walks back out with a water bottle in hand, he closes the door behind him and speaks up without looking at you. 

“Alright let’s go – oh, you gotta be fucking kidding me!” He yells, startling some of the people who are still out on the porch. But you are gone. 

“Jesus H. Christ!” 

-

Another sleepless night keeps Steve on his toes. He hates it. He finished his homework earlier tonight, he went out for a run, took a long shower, cleaned his room and reread Pride and Prejudices again. 

He wanted to go to the movies with Nancy but she had already made plans with Barb tonight – a ‘girls sleepover’. 

He envies her a little, he doesn’t have any friends anymore, no one to hang out with, no one to play basketball with, no one to go to the movies with. He misses it. 

He lies in his bed, throwing a baseball into the air and listening to Tears For Fears. He lets his mind wander, he wonders what you are doing right now, he wonders if you are with Eddie tonight, he wonders if – no. Stop it, just stop it. 

Sighing, he throws the ball across the room, letting it bounce of the wall and onto the floor, he turns on his side, facing his nightstand and the telephone he keeps staring at every night, hoping for a call from –

His heart leaps to his throat and he almost jumps up when it starts ringing. He stares at it for a moment, almost in disbelief. 

The shrill ringing continues to sound through the room and he leans over, grabbing the receiver and sitting up as he holds it to his ear. 

“Hello?” 

Steve doesn’t know what or who he expected it to be – maybe Nancy or his mom or even Dustin or one of the other kids who sometimes prank call him but when he hears the quiet sniffle, he instantly knows who it is without having to hear the voice first. 

His face falls and a frown takes over. 

“Steve?” 

next chapter

taglist: @corrodedcorpses @corrodedseraphine @wroteclassicaly @screammunson @hellfire--cult @taintedcigs @take-everything-you-can @nemesis729 @sherrylyn628 @somethingvicked @xxhellfiregirlxx @trashmouth-richie

[ladyloveandjustice]

My Favorite Books I Read in 2023

I read a ton of good novels last year- 36 in all (and uh, 78 manga/graphic novels, but we'll examine that in another post). Here's a link to my Goodreads year in books (the manga is at the beginning, the novels start with Siren Queen) and my storygraph wrap up.  

I reread a ton of Discworld this year, and it's as spectacular as ever. But what about new reads?

Well, here are my favorite books I read in 2023!

In the Dream House by Carmen Maria Machado

This is an autobiographical memoir about the abusive relationship the author went through with her ex-girlfriend. It's absolutely gut-wrenching, and at times, achingly beautiful. Machado uses the house she shared with her girlfriend, which she calls the "dream house", as a back drop. It's a place she always wanted and also a place she became trapped in, Machado's language is beautiful as she explores the relationship from different lenses-- The Dream House as Lesbian Cult Classic, the Dream House as Noir, the Dream House as Creature Feature, the Dream House as Stoner Comedy....All facets of the relationship are explored in a way that grips you by the throat and makes you remember everyone who ever tried to suffocate you-- but it also explores the hard work of moving on, of picking up the pieces, of living and embracing tenderness along with hardship.

I especially related to Machado's struggle to talk about abuse between queer lovers because of her fears of giving homophobes more ammunition...and when she says "we deserve to have our wrongdoing represented as much as our heroism, because when we refuse wrongdoing as a possibility for a group of people, we refuse their humanity", I felt that deeply.

This wasn't just one of my favorite books this year, it goes on the list of all-time favorite books. I wish I had this kind of writing style. I'll be returning to this again and again.

Zachary Ying and the Dragon Emperor by Xiran Jay Zhao

A middle-grade novel about a Chinese-American teen who feels a bit alienated from his heritage, which becomes a bit of an issue once he finds out the First Emperor of China has possessed his A.R. Gaming Headset. Now he needs to close a portal to the underworld with the help of other kids possessed by emporers.

This was a whole lot of fun, and often quite poignant. I was unsure if I could really enjoy middle-grade books as an adult, and this absolutely proves I can. There's a lot of really interesting Chinese history blended with action-packed fantasy, and exploration of the complicated feelings a kid can have about their own heritage . The dynamic between Zachary and Qin Shi Huang was so entertaining with the Emperor being villainous, heroic, charismatic, detestable-- and Zachary realizing how his complicated feelings about him mirror his relationship with his culture at large. There was also a lot of fun with other historical figures, and Xiran's take on Wu Zetian is a joy. (Also, if you like Yu-Gi-Oh!, you'll probably like this, since Xiran says it was one of their influences).

Camp Damascus by Chuck Tingle

Rose is young woman who's raised in a fundamentalist Christian household, and she's a devout, obedient daughter. But some weird things are happening. She's seeing a terrifying demon everywhere, insects are coming out of her mouth....and she's possibly having feelings about other girls. What's going on?

Yes, this is by the Chuck Tingle who makes all those Tinglers. But THIS one... will make you tingle with fear! It's a great horror novel! It's skin-crawlingly creepy at times, but also does a great job digging into how fundamentalist dogma harms queer people, and the hypocrisy of such beliefs. The conversion camp aspect is handled tastefully, and overall it was a great spooky read that's also ultimately very affirming, cathartic, and hopeful.

Qualia the Purple by Hisamitsu Ueo

You might go into this thinking it's just a quirky yuri light novel about a schoolgirl and her crush who sees everyone around her as robots (like literally, when she looks at someone she sees a robot instead of a human). But it quickly becomes surreal queer psychological horror steeped in absolutely wild applications of quantum mechanics and thought-provoking time travel.  Some of the quantum mechanics  exposition dumps were a bit much but I deeply enjoyed having my mind cracked open by this book. 

It's one of the most interesting takes of time loop stories I've seen. But it definitely covers a lot of rough subject matter, including a relationship with a serious age gap and extremely messed up relationships, so be cautious if you have triggers.

Our Wives Under the Sea by Julia Armfield

This book follows Miri, whose wife goes missing on a deep-sea submarine mission for six months. Miri thought her wife dead, but she miraculously returns one day...but her wife has changed. She's like a stranger. She may have bought the horrors of the sea home with her.

This is a gripping exploration of grief and loss combined with a delicious, slow horror that creeps under your skin. There's excellent Lovecraftian and body horror elements to the novel, but it works very effectively as a metaphor for a loved one going through trauma, and a relationship starting to crumble because everything seems different. A moment that really stuck out to me is when Miri copes with her wife's disappearance by frequenting an online community where women roleplay as wives with husbands missing in space. The way the online drama of the community interacted with her grief was  both funny and heartbreaking. 

This is another example of a book that makes me deeply jealous with its lyrical writing, and another one for the ever-lengthening all time favorites list.

Otherside Picnic Volume 8: Accomplices No More by Iori Miyazawa

The latest entry in a series about two girls exploring an alternate dimension full of creepypasta monsters, while also falling in love with each other. See my other reviews here and here.

This volume has the payoff to a lot of careful character work and relationship building, and it was completely satisfying. In fact, it was...show-stopping. Spectacular.  Incredible. I loved the exploration of how love, sex, and romance are so different for different people and it's impossible to put it in neat boxes. The frank and messy conversation our leads have about their relationship was perfect and so was that absolutely  bonkers, wonderful finale. This is another one for the all times favorite list, and I loved it so much I wrote a extremely long review/recap here. 

Queer Ducks (and Other Animals): The Natural World of Animal Sexuality by Eliot Schrefer

This was a well-researched, well-crafted, easy to read book that explores queerness (mainly homosexuality, bisexuality, trans and genderfluid expressions in animals, and even the question of if and how animals can related to gender) in the animal kingdom. Though it's definitely aimed at teens, I learned a lot from it (who knew female bonobos were such life goals) and it presented its information in a fun way. It included some interesting examinations of how proof of homosexuality and bisexuality in animals was historically suppressed and filtered through homophobic assumptions. If you want to learn a little animal science in an accessible format, definitely check this out.

Night’s Edge by Liz Kerin

The story follows Mia, a woman in her 20's living with her vampire mother. Her whole life revolves around not drawing suspicion towards her Mom. She also has to make sure to feed her Mom some of her blood every night--lest her mother fall back in with her abusive boyfriend and start hunting humans.  But when Mia meets a cute girl, she starts to dream of living her own life...

It was a really interesting use of vampirism as a metaphor for both living with a parent struggling with addiction and having an abusive parent. It's just a well-told, heartwrenching tale that got deep into the character's mindsets. I thought the ending was bit abrupt and rushed, but it did make more sense once I realized this was the first in a duology. It's a fascinating take on vampires, and I'm interested in seeing more.

The Adventures of Amina al-Sirafi by Shannon Chakraborty

This novel follows a middle-aged Muslim female pirate living around the Arabian Peninsula. She's supposed to be in retirement, but wouldn't you know it, she's lured in for one last job! I she rescues a kidnapped girl,  she'll have all the riches she needs to set her family up for life. So Amina begins her adventure of fighting demons and monsters and ex-husbands. But the job might not be all it seems.

This novel is full of all the entertaining swashbuckling action and shenanigans that any pirate story should have. It's a rollicking good time, and feeds my craving for middle aged women going on quests and kicking ass. Amina's journey is a fun, wild ride full of dynamic characters and interesting mythology!

Yellowface by R.F. Kuang

Juniper is friends with a successful Chinese-American author, Athena Liu, and has always been deeply jealous of her. When Athena dies in front of her, Juniper decides to steal her manuscript rooted in Chinese history and claim it as her own. But plagiarism might catch up with her...

This is a strong example of a book I thought was really well-done, but one I'm probably never going to read again. The way it depicted Twitter drama is just too accurate and I got anxiety. It did such a good job putting you in Juniper's awful shoes so you can feel the pressure close in along with her. The book's commentary on the insidious racism of the publishing industry was effective, and it made a horrible character's journey fascinating to follow. I was so intrigued yet anxious I had to force myself to finish the last few pages.

Bonus read:

Legends and Lattes by Travis Baldtree

A very cute novel about an orc named Viv who decides to retire from the violent life of a bounty hunter and run a coffee shop instead. She ends up getting a lot of assistance from a succubus named Tandri...and my, is that a slow-burn coffee shop romance brewing? This book reminds me a lot of various cozy slice-of-life anime, and it's nice to be getting more of that feeling in book form. I wish there was a little more specific to the fantasy world rather than making it a coffee shop that line up 1 to 1 to a modern day shop, but it was definitely a sweet read.

[captainjacklyn]

Can I make a request a headcanon of Riddle, Vil's, Jamil's and Azul's reaction to finding out that their romantic partner is a direct descendant of the Great Seven? (Like the ones who found and made their dorms?)

Male or Female Yuu/MC/Reader/Y/N please and thank you!

What a wonderful ask, my friend ! I apologize for making this so late, I hope that you will still enjoy reading these head canons if you are still out there. I'll be using gender neutral reader since I wanted everyone to enjoy it but if you wish for a male/female reader only, send in a request and I'll get right to it !

Pairing(s) : vil schoenheit x reader, jamil viper x reader, Azul ashengrotto x reader, riddle rosehearts x reader

Warning(s) : gn!reader, may have some cursing, they/them pronouns are used but gender isn't mentioned, reader is a merfolk in Azul's part (cause you know- Ursula is a mermaid..), also they act similar to their ancestors.

Jamil, Vil, Riddle and Azul finding out that their partner is a descendant of one of the great sevens :

Riddle Rosehearts

When Riddle first met you, he didn't think much of it. Sure you were quite commanding and respected the rules of his dorms very well (which he appreciated) but he just thought it was your personality and nothing more.

When he found you looking at the Queen of Heart's statue, he was surprised to see dissatisfaction on your face. You appeared a little bothered and as your partner he wished to make sure his s/o was alright.

"Is everything ok my Rose ? You seem a little out of your element."

"Ah Riddle, no I'm all good I'm simply thinking about certain things concerning my ancestor."

"Oh, and who are they ?"

"The one I'm looking at right now."

....

WhAt-

he wasn't expecting that, honestly, it feels like a bucket of ice got dropped on his head. Since she is seen in such a positive light in Night Raven College, he will start asking you about her.

"Oh she was a tyrannical queen, absolutely insane with no moral whatsoever. The only traditions we pass down in the family are the rules and leadership qualities, those are taught to the kids at a young age. I never admired her, not once. Sometimes rules didn't even need to be broken for her to cut someone's head off. If she was in front of me, breathing, at this exact moment I would give her a taste of her own medicine."

...

He didn't expect that, not once did he think of it that way. What was pictured to be a righteous royal turned out to be someone who beheaded people for a yes or a no.

It doesn't change what he thinks about you, you are your own person and what your ancestor did is unforgivable.

he's just stunned, and maybe a bit more proud of being your significant other.

Vil Schoenheit

You and Vil are the star couple of NRC, people literally turn blind when they look at the both of you. Dazzled with glam and beauty I swear to god-

He's glad he doesn't have to constantly shout at you for being reckless and ruining your eyeshadow. Not like some people

You were the perfect visual depiction of a queen/king/royal, I imagine you two walking down the school hallway and a red carpet spawns out of nowhere for the both of you to walk on.

Aphrodite has favorites.

You take good care of your appearance, no matter the special/ so called 'unusual' features you carry, you still manage to appear even more wonderful than the Fairest Queen herself.

Rook stalks you follows you around a lot. He would gush at you everyday as you sat in front of the mirror and prepared yourself for the day.

He does this to Vil as well and y'all consider this normal at this point. If you don't, then get prepared to be spooked all the time. Like...all the time.

"My my [Nickname], you look especially splendid today ! Not like you aren't usually, but you managed to make your beauty shine even more than it already was !"

"Well I am the Fairest Queen's great-great-great-great granddaughter/son/child after all."

"..."

"Pardon me."

"Where did that come from ? Orchidia was that in the script-"

Rook will tell Vil immediately, it isn't like it will affect your relationship in any way, he just thinks its a very interesting fact about you.

He may or may not flatter himself with it, but even if you weren't, your beauty does shine without an ancestor to prove it.

Jamil Viper

You are an amazing tactician, I mean, you were capable of coming up with a plan to stop kalim from burning down the dorm 10 days before it had the possibility of taking place.

And let's not ignore your persuasive abilities, you don't even need unique magic to have 200 students do what you want.

You and Jamil are one manipulative pair, but at least you have good morals. Kinda wishing you were there during the entirety of chapter 4 because it would have been over in one episode with no overblot happening at all.

Wether you scold him after finding out is your choice, but if it does happen don't be too harsh about it, his mind is little coo-coo at the moment.

So much that the only thing he catches you saying is :

"...And I don't want you turning into my great-great-great-great uncle simply because things didn't go your way. He was one manipulative and deceiving *sshole who I wish was never related to me at all. He was smart but for the wrong reasons, you are so much better than the sorcerer of sands Jamil ! I know it, and if anyone or anything is bothering you, I expect a full ranting session from your part-" "Wait you're related to the sorcerer of sands ?"

"...."

"Did you hear anything else about what I said ?"

"To be honest..."

"No."

Well that went well.

He is genuinely impressed and a little disappointed about the fact that the very man who represents his dorm is a huge traitor.

You're the one to talk- Lady Orchidia please calm down

He understands what you mean but his perception on Kalim won't change so if you're friends with the guy he stresses over everyday than you're gonna have to learn to live with it.

I repeat, it doesn't change your love for one another, except this time he'll be watching his back a little more. Knowing your advantage against him.

He's soft for you ngl

Azul Ashengrotto

Who are you and why are you so cute together-

Octopus lovers. Oh my god this is too much.

Orchidia you still need to finish the fanfic Shut your mouth and let me die, I finally found my reason to sleep forever.

You will probably have to be a mermaid/man/folk due to your origins but your appearance is your choice cause I'm too lazy to give you one also I have no idea what you look like.

You are once again amazing at convincing people into obeying your orders and both loves and fears your skill.

You are also is source of confidence and pride, if you can be happy in your original fish form than so can he (you just gotta tell him that often.)

He'll find out during a normal conversation where the two of you are in his office as he's arranging the contracts and listening to you talk about your day.

"Oh and did you know my family is related to the sea witch ? I know it's crazy to believe but-" "YOU'RE RELATED TO THE BENEVOLENT SEA WITCH ?!" "Yes...?" *runs up to you and shoves contract in your face* "Please marry me."

He is very happy and very excited, acting like a fan who gets to meet his idol for the first time in person.

He thought highly of you before, now it's through the stars. get it ? cause he thought highly of you ? damnit I suck at jokes.

He's willing to hear you talk about your ancestor for hours and hours, she is his role model after all.

Finds himself very lucky to be with you, even prior to your declaration. You two are just adorable- SQUISHY OCTOPUS !

[yourdeepestfathoms]

a Pathologic tier list based on how good of an adult the characters are to Clara, a child

this is based on P1, but the tier list site i was using only had the P2 models!

i was meant to have longer, more in-depth explanations, but then i got lazy 😅 so i just have some basic reasoning!

also i haven’t replayed the Changeling route in a few months, so i’m going off of memory!

Actually A Kind, Considerate Adult To A Stressed and Traumatized Child

Lara- Lara is hands down the best adult in this entire game. She’s kind, understanding, and patient with Clara. She never insults her, and even when Clara is being a bit snooty, she still treats her gently. She also literally has a line where she points out that Clara is a child struggling with an immense burden. She calls attention to the fact that she’s just a kid, which NOBODY ELSE DOES.

“Poor thing, I’m so sorry for you. I wouldn’t want to carry your burden.”

It can kinda be read as pity, but pity is better than the cruelty and ignorance to her situation most of the others give her.

Also she has the one voice like where she’s like, “Poor child, she’s so tired” in reference to Clara.

Lara stays winning fr fr

The Tragedians and Executors- Idk if these guys can count, but they’re here anyway. They’re always so nice to Clara, calling her little pet names and explaining stuff to her in a kind way. They talk to her like how adults talk to young children, which she is. And it’s wild how these bitches beat THE ENTIRETY OF THE WHOLE CAST, minus Lara.

A Good Adult

Oyun- I actually cannot believe this guy is this high.

Surprisingly, he’s actually pretty nice to Clara. If not nice, then very respectful. He treats her like a queen.

Rubin- He’s chill with her 👍 (if i remember correctly)

Yulia- Similar to Rubin, she’s chill toward Clara, minus, I think, one little offhand comment that’s kind of rude. But compared to what some of the bitches below say to her, it may as well be a compliment.

Decent But Has Their Moments

Artemy- So, I feel like Artemy is very neutral toward Clara. There is that part in the Changeling route where he sends her a letter where he threatens to kill her, BUT that only happens if you rat out his location to Daniil, so it’s not a set event that always happens.

He speaks to her very curtly, and you can get the sense that he’s probably annoyed by her presence, but he’s not outwardly verbally abusing her unlike others.

If this were a ranking based on P2 interactions, however, he would be WAY LOWER because jfc, he is SO MEAN to Clara.

Daniil- So, he was actually lower at first, but then I saw some really good posts talking about how he cares for Clara in his own way (giving her money, keeping her in the Stillwater, worrying over her)—even if they are a little unconventional.

However, that doesn’t erase the fact that he is still pretty awful to her at times. I mean, he literally threatens to kill her twice, one of which happened when he first met her.

I love the “Daniil is a reluctant father figure to Clara” so much, but I also don’t think he would be any higher than this.

Also, like Artemy, if this were for interactions in P2, he would absolutely be lower.

Neutral

Olgimsky- I think he and Clara talk exactly two (2) times, and both interactions are short and don’t really do anything for the story (if i remember correctly). Also I don’t think they give af about each other at all.

Bad Grief- Neutral. I could have put him higher, actually. He seemed actually kind of nice.

Eva- Same with Bad Grief. Her interaction with Clara wasn’t hostile at all.

Victor- I’ll be real with y’all- I don’t remember them talking 😭

Not A Good Adult

Maria- She’s my second favorite character in the whole game (just behind Clara ofc), but even I can’t deny how cruel she is to Clara. She is SO MEAN.

Aspity- I actually had no idea where to put her. At first, she was in the “decent” section, but that didn’t seem right. Then she was in “Neutral,” but that didn’t seem right, either. Finally, I just decided to put her here. Because, looking back on their interactions, they were pretty hostile.

I don’t think Aspity liked Clara. A lot of the things she said to Clara were either vaguely threatening or directly threatening.

Anna Angel- She was so rude to Clara in the Haruspex route when Clara came running to her house, crying, on Day 6. Also I remember her making shots at Clara often.

Georgiy- Literally threatened to kill Clara the moment he met her. Enough said.

Mark- I remember this bitch ass being snappy with her. Which is good enough for me.

Vlad Jr.- This dude isn’t necessarily mean, but I do remember him being weirdly fanatical toward Clara. He spoke to her like she wasn’t a child but rather someone to be idolized.

Peter- He also wasn’t rude, but I just felt very uncomfortable every time he talked to her. He didn’t speak to her like a child but rather an adult. And yeah, a lot of people did that, but he was just so creepy to me. He acted like she was a goddess or something. It really rubbed me the wrong way.

Block- This may be a bit of an unpopular opinion, but I just can’t put this guy anywhere but here.

Yes, he was kind to her, but he also idolized her, which is just…Not Very Good. Also he fully tries to bring her to war?? If you say no when he first makes the offer, he literally ignores her and keeps going on about it which is a huge red flag.

Horrible Fucking Person

Andrey- I can’t stand this guy. Y’all don’t understand how deep my hatred for him goes. But this spot isn’t even a biased decision he is, SO CRUEL. The way he screams in Clara’s face when she went to his bar?? And yeah, he’s kinda right in some sense, she isn’t old enough to fully understand what she’s doing, but that is not her fault in any way. The blame should fall upon Katerina for making her run around indoctrinating people, not her. And he shouldn’t have yelled at a little girl, spewing insults at her, because at that point, his argument is meaningless when it directly attacks her.

He’s terrible. I hate him.

What The Fuck Is Wrong With You

Aglaya- Basically every word she spoke to Clara felt like a shotgun blast to the chest and had my jaw on the FLOOR. I was not expecting the sheer disgust and hatred she had toward this child.

As such, I have compiled a short list of some of the things she said to Clara:

1. Calls her a “dim, pathetic creature”

2. Calls her insane and deranged

3. Accuses her of having a split personality disorder and being schizophrenic

4. “Prohibits her from existing”

5. Says she has to leave the town or else she’ll have her executed

Among other stuff.

Obligatory “Awful Parents” Spot

The Saburovs- I could go on about how horrible these guys are. Not even just as people, but as parents, too.

The neglect, the exploitation, the abuse, the total disregard for Clara’s feelings when she comes back traumatized while carrying a severed head, the way she’s used to inaugurate people into a religion…

They are truly awful people, and they do not deserve Clara.

[simonsapelsin]

It's the 1980s. Young Prince Wilhelm is reading a comic book and notices a page in the back titled Pen Friends. It's a listing of names, ages, addresses, and short descriptions of kids looking for pen pals. One in particular catches his eye: a boy his age in the town of Bjärstad (so close!) who is just as passionate about his favorite superhero as he is. Lonely Wille writes to the boy, Simon, using a P.O. Box that his older brother Erik had set up for his own secretive purposes. (Erik knows that Wille could use a friend, and is willing to send and receive the letters for him.) Wille uses a fake last name and doesn't tell Simon that he's a prince.

A great epistolary friendship soon blossoms. They first write about comics, tv shows, pop music, likes and dislikes; then about their families and school, worries and aspirations (Simon is very candid; Wille sometimes tells careful half-truths to shield his identity). One day Simon mentions thinking a male comic book character is good looking, and that opens up an ongoing conversation about liking boys. Simon is sure that he's gay, and has come out to a select few people in his life; Wille is not at all sure of his identity, but is bold enough to admit feelings to Simon that he's told no one else about, and is only just realizing himself.

Simon sends Wille a photo of himself, a school portrait. Wille keeps saying he'll send one soon. He keeps Simon's letters in a shoebox tucked far under his bed. He keeps his photo under his pillow at night, and always remembers to move it into his desk drawer during the day, so the maid doesn't find it.

They start to write about possibly meeting up, since they aren't too far away from one another. Maybe pizza, an arcade? Simon writes his home phone number in a P.S. in one of his letters, asks Wille to call if he wants to, so they can make a plan. Wille memorizes the number. He goes into Erik's room when he's away, sits in front of the phone (Erik has a private phone line), winds and unwinds the long spiral cord around his fingers, picks up the headset, dials most of the digits. Hangs up when his heart starts beating too fast.

One day Simon writes that he'll be going to a new school with his sister. Hillerska. A posh boarding school, but he'll be commuting from home. It's where Crown Prince Erik went! Simon doesn't want to go. He's worried about not making any friends, about not relating to the rich kids there. He wishes he could be Wille's friend. For real.

Wille writes that he's sorry he hasn't called yet. He wants to, but he's been busy, and his parents and older brother are always using the phone when he's free. He'll try again soon. And he's sure Simon will make a friend at Hillerska.

"Mamma?" Wille knocks on his mother's office door.

"Come in, Wilhelm," Queen Kristina replies.

Wilhelm enters, and sits in the seat across from his mother. She looks up from her papers. "Yes?"

"Mamma, I changed my mind. I do want to go to Hillerska."

[lethargicmouse]

tell us your favorites everlark fics

Thanks for the ask!! They make me very excited lol. I honestly don’t read a lot of everlark lol, I’m more of a hayeffie fan with a side of everlark. Just becuase I feel like mother Suzanne did a good job with them in the books. But truly, a lot of my fav hayeffie ships are from either Peeta or Katniss’ perspective.

The ones listed here are mostly post epilogue (:

( I lied they are all post epilogue.)

this is the first day of my life by sam_writes_fics @sam-loves-seb ----> "It’s not perfect. None of them are perfect. But that’s not the point. // katniss and peeta and haymitch and effie and their life after everything;" I LOVE THIS IT WAS GOOD

You Are in Love (Everlark's Version) by bored_author ---> "A collection of one-shots about Katniss and Peeta working through their traumas, together." This is probably the most everlark one on here. It was cute

The Team Trap by EllanaSan @ellainthetardis (my queen omg) ---> "'What’s the very good reason that’ll get her to come?/ Katniss asked. Peeta was silent for a moment, his hand stilled on her back. 'It involves a technical white lie.' In her experience, lies were hardly ever technical or white." I love EllanaSan with my entire heart.

End of the World by FernWithy ---> Ok this is a very Haymitch centered series but it literally rocked my world and I think everyone needs to read this. There is some awesome POV's of characters you rarely hear from. Delly gets the spotlight she deserves and Peets gets it, too. It's a wonderful, long read that I'd highly reccomend.

Sorry there isn't more! I have lots of other fics that I really enjoy that are from Peeta or Katniss' view that are just more Hayeffie centric (linked under the line (: ), I tried to pull the more Everlark ones for you !

they got no idea (about me and you) by fckingpoetry ---> "peeta looks for advice on how to keep katniss safe in the arena and walks in on haymitch and effie sleeping in the same bed." I cannot stress how much I love this author. And any fic where the kids find out about Effie and Haymitch makes me giggle.

The Clue in the Yoghurt by EllanaSan ---> "In retrospect, Haymitch should have known something was up the morning he walked into his kitchen, rubbing his face to chase the remnants of sleep, and found Katniss pilfering his fridge." So silly, Katniss accidental pregnancy and it makes me smile to see hayeffie acting like the parents they are.

Sprinkled on Your Life by KarlyBING ---> "With all her silliness, shallowness, and overbearing ways, Effie had still cried while holding her after coming back from the arena, she was the one to publicly unite them during the Quell, cared for her during a war, braided her hair when she was too depressed to do it herself, made her wedding dress out of worn cotton shirts and second-hand wool, held her hands after delivering her first child, changed diapers at 3 am so Peeta and her could sleep a couple more hours, taught her children how to say please and thank you, and still made her hot chocolate every rainy day without even having to ask." I cried. So much. For only 1,801 words. A nice look at mama!Effie and darling Katniss.

that which resembles a grave (but isn't) by ifonlyiwasawriter ---> "Haymitch finds Katniss covered in dirt in his backyard; there is an explanation for this, but not one that either of them likes." Haymitch and Katniss, lovely very traumatized father and very traumatized daughter bonding.

Any way I love Haymitch and Effie goodnight !

[anakin-vaders]

The role of Fashion in The Hunger Games saga a brief analysis.

Ok now with the hunger games renaissance we need to discuss the role Cinna plays in the whole series, and the role of fashion in the hunger games. I read this series when I was 11-12 years old, I grew to become a very, very queer fashion designer (I work for drag queens), I didn't think I truly understood how much THG series impacted me until very recently when I saw/read the whole series again. Like yes, Suzanne Collins makes the Capitol this shallow society, putting a real effort in making their citizens be superficial only caring about their looks, looking super extravangant and absolutely disconnected from the suffering of the districts. While their looks are vibrant, large, shimmery, and totally over the top (showcasing their opulence) the way they dress on the districts (specially 12 and 13) is minimalist, modest, the colors are washed, old. Their each other's antithesis. And of course Katniss expects only that from the people of the Capitol (classic Us vs. Them), and when Cinna, whom I think is very queer coded, comes in, and treats her like a human being, she starts to let her walls down, to let herself be guided trough this horrible thing she's got to endure. In the books when Cinna and his team are pampering her, she doesn't see herself as a symbol, she never really wanted to be one, she feels really dehumanized. Her only motivation upon this point is surviving and get back to Prim on her home, she still thinks everything on the Capitol in stupid and unnecessary. It's only when Cinna puts them in this very intricate and thought out looks inspired by their district industry (coal mining) that I think Katniss starts to understand the power of fashion, the power of symbols.

And later in her interview with Caesar we have the infamous red dress that catches fire and that lefts the audience gagged (if any of y'all have been to a drag show you know how amazing a good reveal is). This moment is so important because now fashion doesn't become something merely functional, or oppressive. Fashion is empowering, this moment is Katniss getting confidence in herself, asserting herself over her circumstances thanks to Cinna, thanks to fashion. It's also very brilliant because this is also catered to the Capitol, to the viewers and consumers of the games. One of the first things Haymitch tells Katniss is to make herself desirable, and this totally makes sense, the Capitol now roots for her, relate to her, so that later she can get sponsors and SURVIVE.

On Catching Fire we have another iconic fashion moment, fire is a very present theme for Katniss. She is of course the spark for the rebellion, and when she understood it, the message not only becomes clearer, it becomes a protest against the games, against the Capitol. The way she and Peeta are almost regal their second time on the games, shows how much she's understood the power of fashion, the power of the message it can send. They look like a piece of coal refusing to cool, refusing to stop burning. And this was all Cinna's mind.

And my absolute favorite. The wedding dress, such and iconic moment and dare I say, a pivotal moment for the rebellion. In the books Katniss and Peeta are doomed to keep their fake relationship for PR reasons, so they get engaged, and make their whole wedding (bear in mind they're both 17 ish here) a reality show-esque moment for the Capitol. Even after they've won, they still have to entertain them, a winner can never rest. The districts are never winners. So when Snow decides to make his personal quest that of making Katniss miserable, thus making his All Star version of the games, knowing district 12 only has 1 female winner...oh if that isn't some evil shit. On top of that, he is the one who request she wears her wedding dress to the interview, the dress that symbolizes all she never wanted (get married, have kids, loose her agency, being controlled by the Capitol). Snow does this hopping Katniss feels ALL THAT, and Cinna being the genius designer he fucking is, turns a 180 on it and gets the wedding dress as a façade, he uses the dress as a symbol of the tragic lovers that never got to wed, the wedding the Capitol never got to see because of the games. And it works. It fucking works.

And then, the dress burns up revealing a beautiful black dress with wings, a mockingjay, she literally becomes the rebellion, she embodies the rebellion and all that comes with it. The power of fashion in the middle of an uprising, and how much it strikes the Capitol because it's said in their language. All of these moments were essential in the history because the people on the districts already knew about the injustices, about the hardships of their conditions. But the consumers didn't. And Cinna, trough Katniss made them see that, he took everything that made the Capitol shallow and gave actual meaning to it. And without of all of it, who knows if the rebellion would've gestated as fast.

TL;DR: the hunger games saga made me a fashion designer, and fashion is really important in the story, dare I say it's a really clever use of fashion and Cinna is a FUCKING genius.

[fairytale-poll]

ROUND 2A, MATCH 6 OUT OF 8!

Propaganda Under the Cut:

Queen Cinderella Charming:

She's kind, she's funny, she learns to use a sword, and she's related to Snow White, Sleeping Beauty, and Red Riding Hood. She helps the protagonists any chance she gets and even hosts their mother and step-father's wedding. She never gives up and  never lets her fear stop her. Absolute queen (literally) <3

While she isn't hugely relevant in the story itself, she is always down to help out the protagonists where she can. When they need one of her slippers, she sneaks it into their bag without them noticing. She calls them family. She loves her daughter too, and is a badass mom.

When the main characters need her glass slipper for a spell, she snuggled it into their bag, and she has a daughter named Hope <3

I think she’s a minor character in the first book, but she’d really nice and stuff!

Because I LOVE HER!! also she has a daughter called Hope who got kidnapped by rumplestiltskin at one point but that is besides the point. She is a strong independent woman and we love those she was NOT about to sit around doing nothing and i love her for that

Vote Land of Stories Cinderella because she's the best!!!

Elegance "Ella" Coach:

Ella fights for labor reform! I just reread the book intentionally so I could make propaganda for her but now my head is empty only LOVE FOR ELLA. She has two (gay) fairy godfathers, she worked in a sweatshop where her mother died, she has a well-developed with her prince, Dash Charming. The glass slippers are a very important motif even though she doesn’t actually get a pair herself because she was a secret fairy godparent case because the fairy godparent organization had become corrupt and wasn’t helping needy children, only the rich. It’s a sequel to Grounded which is a Rapunzel story, but Disenchanted stands alone in the same world and it’s my most favorite of the two!! She’s so kind and helps institute kingdom wide labor reform and ahhhhhhhh

Former child laborer who wants to use her family's newfound privilege to fight for workers' rights. Brave, smart, and compassionate, although she can also be reckless, because she's just a kid and she deserves BETTER. Actually has a good relationship to her step-family, who are badass and Black like her, and there's this really touching moment at the end that recontextualizes things a lot and it's very sweet and cool worldbuilding. Her fairy godmother is two gay contractors who overthrow their boss for being complicit in a corporate espionage/coup scheme. She has a nice and believable relationship with her prince, who is a fucking dork that learns to be less of a privileged idiot and would absolutely put his ass on the line for her in return. She's just so GOOD and Disenchanted is UNDERRATED, everyone go read it.

Her goal is to improve workers rights, directly inspired by the 19th century textile industry, right down to child labor and workers getting locked in factories. Her mother died working in a sweatshop. She struggles with her working class upbringing and her new upper class status after her father's invention made them rich. Not afraid of breaking the law. She's so cool and her book is so good.

[xecutivecucumber]

Executive Cucumber's Thoughts on the Bad Batch 03x09!

Spoilers under the cut

Apologies for this being late, I worked overtime and then immediately went to rescue my sister and her kids from a car breakdown. I got overwhelmed pretty quick.

I really liked this episode, but as I was in a not great mood when I watched it, I didn't absorb as much as I normally do. (My mood really affects how much I enjoy something, regardless of quality. I was in a foul mood when I first watched Faster and was fairly critical of it. I was wrong.)

This is really the first time we've seen not beautiful weather on Pabu and that's terrifying.

CROSSHAIR IS PART OF A COMMUNITY!!! Have yall considered that he's never been a part of a community before? Like yes, he's has his family, but a community?

'Does it matter? We're not giving her up.' This man. I love this man. If Tech did not already reign Supreme in my heart, I think Crosshair would be my favorite character in Star Wars.

ASAJJ VENTRESS MY QUEEEEEEEEEN

Oh Omega, that story fell apart faster than Hunter's resistance to adopting you.

They leave a space for Tech 💔

Apparently those blood tester things that Qui Gon had were Jedi issue only.

YOU CAN DO IT OMEGA!!! Wrecker, honey, if Omega CAN do it, that means her life gets WAY harder.

They one hundred percent sent Crosshair to look at Tech's data because Hunter and Wrecker can barely do it.

'Go get a flower kid, I gotta beat up your dads'

Okay, I honestly think Hunter doesn't have the time for romance and could honestly see him as asexual, but-

HIS WAIST IS SO SLUTTY. HOW IS IT SO SLUTTY.

I don't think we've seen such well choreographed hand to hand fighting in animated Star Wars. Except maybe that time that Rex absolutely destroyed those Zygerrians. But I might be biased about that.

'SHE'S A WAR CRIMINAL OMEGA' Okay now I need to know what defines war crimes in this universe. Did they have space Geneva?

You know, good thing Echo's not here. He'd probably be WAY more pissed than these three.

'You're naive' says the man who was changed by the child saying people can change.

I love Crosshair's 'oh shoot she's right' face.

Wrecker's little gasp when Ventress looks at them is AMAZING.

I love it when Star Wars is using the Force to connect with animals.

I'm sorry, Hunter girlies, I guess we getting wet hair everyone except Hunter. (Though Ventress looks SO GOOD)

VENTRESS YOU QUEEN I LOVE YOU YOU'VE COME SO FAR (I haven't read dark disciple but my sister has, and she informed me that Vos' Dark Side training by Ventress culminated in him summoning a water monster and killing it. This is such a beautiful parallel that she calms it.)

Crosshair helping Omega on is my everything.

I really love that Crosshair has decided to give Ventress a chance, because he was given a chance. (And also I lowkey ship them in a one night stand kinda way. Crossajj is such a good ship name too)

DAD DUO.

I don't think Ventress is lying when she says Omega isn't Force sensitive. Omega doesn't show ANYTHING in this episode that implies that she's sensitive. Yes, she uses Batcher, but she'd trained Batcher with normal friend methods. I think that Ventress stops the testing prematurely before she can be more sure, because she sees the possibly unhealthy attachment the Batch have. It might also be to protect Omega to not know for sure. My personal theory is that Omega is slightly more sensitive than the average clone, but not to any natural talent degree.

Oh gosh, I'm so scared for the next few episodes. Ventress gives them such a clear warning. This episode did such a good job of getting the tension tight again.

I know some people call this episode redundant, but the characters NEED this in order to catch up. We as an audience knew that M Counts meant midichlorians. But the Batch had no idea. Sometimes, we need to let the main characters catch up with us.

(This is also why Tech as CX-2 works on a reveal level because the mystery isn't for us, it's for the characters)

But yeah, a great episode! I'm terrified for everything and everyone!

A quick note- I've seen people say that it's too late in the season for Tech to return. I'd like to remind you that it took exactly two episodes in season 2 to get us behind Crosshair's redemption. They can do a lot in a few episodes.

[ms0milk]

𝟕 | 𝐇𝐞𝐝𝐨𝐧𝐢𝐬𝐭

ー✧ prince!bakugou x royal guard!reader

"Caramel hathos fills your mouth when red eyes let you breathe again."

cw remember when i told you to trust me? angry bkg, angry y/n, shouting, some manhandling. repeated use of "sir" nonsexually though bkg does briefly take pleasure in your power imbalance. y/n's patience is unmatched bless her heart. civil teammates -> enemies. my favorite closing lines ive ever written 2.1k

this chapter officially concludes a hymn to black water part 1, thank you for reading this far with me! and have no fear, part 2 will begin next week :) can't take a break from this story who am i kidding it's just getting good

PREV | M.LIST | TAGLIST | NEXT

She’s been terrorizing you for the better part of the evening. Doctor Chiyo Shuzenji, Takoba’s infamous: Recovery Girl. An evening meant to be spent finding clothes and dinner and Prince Bakugou’s guest chambers so that you could take up your first shift outside of his room.

How could you begin to thank him? Declarations and taken knees occupy the gray space in your brain between constant kisses and ramblings about antivenom. You’re held hostage on hospital linens with thoughts of protective canonfire rage.

“And when I got back– poof! Injured Alderans keep me up all night, I leave for one blessed hour, and come back to six empty beds.”

There’s nothing you can say to appease the doctor as a plate of tea sandwiches is thrust into your lap and the kisses begin again. Your companions were moved to their permanent rooms sometime in the throne room-interim and you were just as surprised to come back to a hospital empty of their warmth as you were to hear such a commanding voice come out of such a tiny woman. Shuzenji's magic bubbles at the surface of your skin like it would be comforting if she wasn’t so agitated.

“How you even managed to stay conscious is– it’s– you’re lucky the adrenaline didn’t course the poison straight to your heart! And the prince! Summoning you from the hospital of all places–”

“My prince?” You interrupt with half a mouth full of bread.

She shakes her head, “The little Todoroki.”

“I thought I was summoned by the queen?”

“My queen is not stupid.”

You submit to treatment again quietly and nurse the plate of food Shuzenji had rushed from the kitchens for you. Was Prince Todoroki in the crowd today? Does he look like his mother? Spiderlace has webbed across your image of the queen and naught but her thin silver hair can be seen behind it.

The doorknob jumps as the doctor pours herself into your discharge instructions, and when she thinks the Champion is the one trying to sneak inside again she huffs at the opening door,

“Mr. Eijirou, if you interrupt this examination one more time–”

It felt cruel to make Kirishima watch so you told him to go find his room and something to eat after he escorted you back upstairs. You told him that you would be perfectly fine for the night. He poked his head inside every now and then when you made a particularly loud yelp at the doctor’s prodding, but left to go find dinner an hour ago. He even said goodnight and slipped your halberd inside by candlelight.

“Kirishima, really I’m–”

“Eh?”

The voice opening the door doesn’t match the person you thought had been knocking, and not only that. Instead of Kirishima, and his big soft worry, the prince emits a cloud of vex so thick that you taste metal.

He mouths confusion at the scene. 

“Perfect timing Katsuki, you’re next.” Shuzenji beckons him inside from her seat at your bed. He closes the door again wordlessly.

Chasing Prince Bakugou down a Takoba hallway is not going to make it into your daily report, partly because it’s indecent, and mostly because there’s no proper way to recall hunting a prince like game sport.

“Highness, please wait!”

Chasing though, is a generous description; you’re more just walking quickly and rather close behind.

As doctor Shuzenji tried to hobble after him, images of the prince hurling diplomats flashed in vivid memory and you sat the old woman back in her seat. You wouldn’t put it past him to launch tiny old women someplace very far away indeed.

“My Prince, please–”

“Please what,” Bakugou growls when you’ve finally pushed him past the shallow threshold of avoidance and squarely into confrontation. You couldn’t drown in the shoals of his patience for how very dry they are.

When he stops marching and turns to you his shoes catch sparks before his words do, “You are not my guard and certainly not my companion– leave me be or die.” And the honesty of his violence stalls your image of protection.

The chase has taken you from the hospital wing and into that wide foyer under skylights and for hours now the moon above has effortlessly outshone candles. Competing lights illuminate only white marble and a blue hallway runner, with no other decoration to fight over but the two of you standing in front of each other.

“The doctor,” you slow down fast enough to leave the prince a wide berth but still stumble over words in remembering names, “she– Shuzenji needs to finish her examination. I’m–”

“No one needs anything from me, least of all you.”

Why is he so upset? When the prince snaps at you, as he has done a hundred little times over the past few days, he makes a point to swell. He thinks he’s very clever. He’ll dip his chin into the modest curve of your body and tower over you, as if you aren’t already trying as hard as you can to make him feel big.

“It’s important that the doctor sees you, sir.”

One of his red eyes twitches a bit by the brow when you call him sir, and you add it to the list of things you’ve done to piss him off,

“Please come with me.”

The prince settles with his hands in his pockets, “And if I don’t?” He’s on the precipice of a smirk when he continues, “Are you gonna make me?”

Did Doctor Shuzenji let you chase after him because the headache might kill her?

“No,” you frown, “of course not.”

The moon is so bright through the windows above you that the candles can only throw limp shadows across the subtle bones of Bakugou’s cheeks. He never stands up straight. His broad shoulders round in on you in a generous size difference as you attempt to avoid the eye contact he hates so much. He cocks his head. There are no clocks or bells inside the castle and still the oppressing awareness of time makes you feel as if you are running out of it; fifteen years crush you under their weight in a second. Fifteen years living together in Aldera castle and only two conversations to show for it. Three, if this game he’s playing counts as conversation.

“Go to bed then.” The prince still manages to look menacing in white linen and woolen slippers and he throws words like spit, “Go anywhere away from me.”

When he turns around to skulk back into the dark you don’t mean to say anything at all and you’re sure you don’t. You’re sure you’re only staring after him- watching his earrings catch the last of the moonlight before turning down a dark corridor.

“Why did you come back?”

Bakugou is also sure you didn’t just speak up again, but still he stalls under an archway and creaks his neck back to you all the same. Your question hangs in the stretch of white hall.

You’re hungry, you are delusionally hungry and drunk on Shuzenji’s magic because nothing under heaven, not even the end of the world, could possess you to to pick a fight with this man, and you must have been drugged or, or you’re still exhausted or wounded, anything. The prince is advancing on you now because of course he is.

He’s charging. He growls so low it’s almost a whisper, “Stand at attention.”

Bakugou doesn’t leave any space between you when he approaches this time. His hair has been knocked into every direction gravity will let it fly, but mostly it falls over menacing red eyes and beads of blood between sharp tooth and bitten lip. Jeanist really deserves a medal or something; even three-hundred miles away, he is right as always. Staring is an incorrigible habit of yours.

“You get concussed in that crowd?” The prince’s voice is still bitingly quiet when he thrusts a palm against your collar to test how much pressure you’ll withstand before failing his orders to stay still. Your dragonbone broach digs into your chest.

“Please excuse me, Highness.”

There’s no way to tell how short a fuse you’ve cut for yourself now, so you continue standing exactly at attention, the same way you’ve spent more hours of your life than you’ve spent sleeping. Your fingers don’t so much as twitch with a pulse while you hold them at your sides under squared shoulders. His eyes graze your cheeks.

“Aldera sent me a beaten puppy as a babysitter on mission that has taken years off my fucking life.”

“I only–”

“Only what?!” Bakugou reaches forward and snatches a bit of your nightgown skirt in his fist. You’re jerked suddenly against his chest in his anger, “You’re fucking naked! “You represented Aldera in a nightgown and now you’re chasing me down the hall with your body sketched in satin for any plum, fae, or stray cat to ogle at their shiteating leisure!”

It hasn’t quite clicked, until now. The reason why the prince hates you.

He releases your skirts and clenches crackling fists at his sides, “What did I tell you about those creepy fucking eyes?”

You don’t mean to stare this time, and you’ve tried so hard, for days you’ve tried, not to look at him, but for the first time since your bloody meeting in the countryside he is finally, truly, looking at you and the eye contact conjures up nothing but static.

It didn’t even make any sense, how someone you’ve never so much as shared a meal with could feel anything strong towards you, negative or otherwise. But it was clear inside the throne room today and you were just too stupid to see anything past the blue silk cloak gathered like a gift for you in his arms.

The prince was never concerned for your safety. He is embarrassed by you.

“What did I say?” Caramel hathos fills your mouth when red eyes let you breathe again.

You glare unabashedly deer-like from the space between your bodies where ire is so thick you could grasp it. At his eyes, his lovely ash lashes and the downward quirk of a snarl. Bold of him, to call you naked in linens that barely hide his chest.

“Apologies.” And for the first time those words burn when they come out of you. Like a lie. You lower your gaze. Bow your head too.

It is the slightest consolation that Bakugou forgot, in his anger, that he’s pulled you close enough for gold to glint clearly in your periphery. His jewelry is artifact forever in the forest somewhere, so the earrings he’s wearing are yours. His mother’s– your little gold suns jerk and tremble with his temper.

If he remembered he was wearing your charity, he would shout again, but his fury has gone smug at your concession so he presses on,

“Did Jeanist not teach you to say anything else?”

Your fingers twitch at the mention of the name.

“Well? Go on, five days together and you still haven’t introduced yourself to your prince.”

Even with your eyes to the floor you can catch a sneer in the tips of his voice. Bakugou is so close that his breath pricks the skin of your bare neck.

“Put on a show for me.”

He doesn’t let you move away from him. When you step one foot back he comes one step forward. You take your skirts in subtle fists and bend your knees in a curtsey, and you anticipate his single huff of laughter before it even escapes him.

“Y/n. Apprentice to the Master Jeanist, Head of Royal Guard. Subject of the Alderan Queen, bound by blood and at your service, my prince.”

“Is that all?”

It goes against natural impulse not to watch the thing that is trying to kill you, closely, and it’s a struggle to keep your eyes down when the prince’s body is so close you can count each embroidered stitch of his bedclothes. Years ago, when Jeanist allowed you to work in the castle, on your own shifts without supervision, the queen would stop when her path crossed your post. She’d call your name and you would answer immediately, though eyes down like you’d been told to do. In these early days she crouched in front of you, cape, gown, armor and all, to try and take a peek at your face, or lift your head up with a finger under the chin.

“Pretty eyes, Y/n. Don’t cast them down for anyone.”

Bakugou has your chin now, in a tight hot hand. He jerks your head up hard enough to make you flinch, and gods he’s growling, rumbling like a machine, at both your lack of response and the fact that you haven’t left yet. The pair of you stare.

“Fuck off, Y/n.”

It is your every itching instinct to strike him.

“Yes, sir.”

PREV | M.LIST | TAGLIST | NEXT

tagged angels ✧.* @nnubee @jctaro @nonomesupposedto @zombiewarprincess @kotarousproperty @strawberry-mentos69 @sveetnn @eirlysian @lunrai @km7474 @arayoflia @annoyingleftpinky @noomaisdone @cr33pycrawler @iced-chai-tea-latte @cathwritestragediesnotsins @tragicallygray @idimmadontgiveashit @kooromin @k1tk4tkatsuki @litiri @kiwibao @kiwifujin @mmmaackerel @sarcasticlittlebook @condy-wants-a-cookie @mysticalfridge @dududubebo @falling4fandoms @katanaski @babitchsuki @romiinlove @cherripunch26 @acid-rain27 @madmayo @bakugouswh0r3 @heart-of-haunt @zukowantshishonourback @420mitskilover <- thank u for your sweet comment! @ultracrii

please let me know if you'd like to be removed from the taglist at any point

couldn't tag for some reason :,(

[artemisandhersilverbow]

Just thinking about the line from My Boy Only Breaks His Favorite Toys:

I'm queen of sandcastles he destroys

A lot of people have touched on Taylor using castles and palaces as a symbolic representation of her career, body of work, specifically those stolen works and versions of herself. They're locked away in a high tower and separated from Lover - TTPD Taylor.

The tension at the end of Bejeweled, when she walks smiling onto her balcony only to quickly show her castle on fire was, in my opinion, easily overlooked. Was she burning it down or had it already been burning down without her noticing? A stone castle on fire would require some orchestration.

Fast forward to TTPD, the line above from MBOBHFT stuck with me because the "boy" here is destroying her sandcastle. Sandcastles are a study in impermanence. We build them as an incredibly basic recreation of the real, impenetrable, almost indestructable thing. But we do so knowing they can't last, they won't. Eventually the tide will wash them clean away or the wind will erode at the structure until it turns back into sand.

That means "the boy" in question is preemptively destroying something that wasn't supposed to be forever anyway.

The first thing about this song that lit up my brain like a firework was the lyrical parallel to Cruel Summer. I mean, if Taylor uses the word "toy" in a song you know it's gonna be sassy af, ok? A girl takes notice.

Fever dream high in the quiet of the night You know that I caught it Bad, bad boy Shiny toy with a price You know that I bought it -------------------- The sickest army doll Purchased at the mall Rivulets descend my plastic smile But you should've seen him When he first got me My boy only breaks his favorite toys

Now, I have had my speculations (as have many others) about Cruel Summer not being a love song, but a PR-ing song. I almost immediately thought the same of MYBOBHFT.

Fortunately, the Barbie movie covers a lot of ground for the "why is using a kind of Barbie-Ken like dynamic excluding a romantic narrative?" Because she's Barbie, he's just Ken, Ken is basically an accessory. Anyway I think this song is absolutely talking about several people or experiences/problematic Hollywood structures etc. in a very smart twisting narrative.

"Fever dream" is playful here in the same way she uses "sickest. " The doll isn't sick and the narrator of Cruel Summer isn't running a temperature. "Shiny toy" and "sickest army doll" feel like even clearer parallels — one "with a price / You know that I bought it" and the other "purchased at the mall." I like the reversal of "You know that I caught it" and "When he first got me" because catching isn't as active as buying. Something happens to you if you catch a fever or something is thrown at you - and that feels like an entirely different he that "got" her. Another play on words because that sounds like ownership and tricking.

I was so confused by sickest army doll at first because she sings it in such a (Lana coded) morose way. I was trying to imagine a sickly Army Barbie? But I think the smart way she's written these lyrics (please read her lyric booklets they are incredibly sneaky, brilliant works of poetry) she's not referring to the "me" as an army doll. In fact what's an "army doll" little kids think are rad? Hm... a G.I. Joe?

The bait and switch of it all, the sandcastle-like metaphors, continue with the above. It sounds like "there were so many reasons why we should have been together forever." But word choice is where this poet shines.

"Litany" is one of those words that always registers to me a "a list" but it's actually got religious roots (of course - this album has so much of that): a form of prayer used in services and processions, and consisting of a number of petitions.

It can also mean "a prolonged or tedious account," which is why you hear an expression like "litany of complaints"... Got it so you had a tedious amount of prayers and petitions *checks notes* for why you could have "played for keeps" THIS. TIME. Have there been other times? Oh right, yes, she's "just repeating herself."

Play for keeps is another one of those terms we use, but don't always know it's full definition. One such definition is "to do something seriously and without showing any mercy."

This sounds less like holding onto a lover who wanted to leave or mistreated you, though I think that should also another lens to view this story... perhaps change lover to authority figure... and more like two people who struck an agreement (one that upheld some good christian values?? too far?) to battle something together... and one of them couldn't stick it out. Perhaps because "he saw forever so he smashed it up"? He was a Bolter too.

So she just wants to be put back on her shelf so she can go through the cycle all over again. In fact, pull a string and she'll repeat the lines she knows so well. Copy+paste.

"I used to switch out these Kens, I'd just ghost" to "I felt more when we played pretend / Than with all the Kens" with her GI Joe? I mean lumping a "lover" into a category with Kens and any kind of doll purchased isn't the most loving way to refer to them lol. And I can't help but notice she's only ever played pretend with all the Kens. But what do you do with your shiny toy when they don't want to play anymore?

The lyric video is simple, but each line comes up one at a time and "breaks," floating pieces falling out of frame. At the end we pan down to see the collected debris.

A pit of broken words.

Also worth noting you can see among the blurred graveyard of words a couple of them are crisp/hidden. They're "Boy breaks his only favorite" or "favorite only"... or his Favourite?

Anyway, we come back 'round to the sandcastle metaphor that got me started. I don't think Taylor's princess castle and her sandcastle are a perfect one to one match symbolically. A stone castle was built with the intention of lasting forever, if it catches on fire that would be surprising... more akin, to me, to her career or Taylor TM?

A sandcastle, however, can't last forever, it's not meant to, but you still build it knowing that. Like an arrangement, contract, role, etc. business or otherwise. For someone to snuff out a sandcastle before time or tides or the inevitable does that for you seems needlessly harsh. Even a short-lived imitation can mean something if you enjoyed building it. In fact, that's the only part that gets to live on once a sandcastle is washed away. And it seems like even that part was ruined.

[missesmckinnon]

a few days late, but can i talk about the red white and royal blue movie for a sec?

im so happy i decided to buy and speed read the book before the movies release, because the book was very good, but the movie was disappointing for a few reasons. it wasn’t bad, it was a good movie, but is was kind of a let down. does that make sense?

sorry if this is incoherent, i just need to get all my thoughts out.

!! SPOILERS AHEAD !!

first, let’s talk about my biggest issue: june. where the hell was she? she was such a big part of the story, and she is apart of the [??] six, and before that the white house trio. there is no white house trio with only two people. i thought that june showed an interesting contrast to alex, not wanting to pursue a career in politics like he does. she became my favorite character instantly, and it was really upsetting that they cut her out.

second: powder princess bea. i know it wasn’t a big part of the story, but it irked me when they cut that part out. bea didn’t have a lot of character in the films, and the parts of her they did show she was basically there to show that henry had a sister that he liked. in the books, bea had a strong personality and a complicated past.

third: rafael luna. oh my god, why cut him out. alex looked up to him as a young, and openly gay, politician. him leaving to work for richards upset alex deeply, and when raf returned, they had a conversation about richards’ advances toward raf and why raf needed to leave in order to bring richards down. alex and raf had such a sweet relationship, and who tf do they think they are, replacing the rafael luna with some dude named miguel.

fourth: philip. in the movie, philip was kind of shown as some guy who values the crown and the traditions it has, but in the books, he’s a dick. it got so bad that bea and henry didn’t talk to him and turned him away when philip offed to help them. if they’d kept his personality the same, i think it would’ve given more depth to henry’s family and the pressure he’s under.

fifth: liam. liam wasn’t a big character, but, if i remember right, alex called liam when he was having his lil gay crisis, and liam showed up at an event at the end of the story. that’s how alex and henry got the bikes to go to alex house in texas.

sixth: henry’s mum standing up to the queen. considering that henry’s mum being emotionally absent was a big part of henry’s story, when catherine (henry’s mum) stood up to the queen and threatened to have her dethroned for suggesting that henry had to hide was a big moment. it showed that she really cared for her kids but was too consumed with her loss to be there for them.

seventh: pez love interest. in the movies, pez and nora had a romance, but in the books it was pez and june. pez and nora don’t make sense to me at all. junes personality was brought out in the best way by pez, and they complimented each other beautifully. but, since june was cut out, they had to do something i guess.

eighth: dialing down richards. richards is a very bad man, and that’s a theme throughout the book. the book is extremely political, so i understand not going too far into that, but richards made advances on luna and his team leaked the footage and emails between henry and alex. it was really dialed down in the film, which upset me.

let me know what you guys thought of the movie, though. the actors who played alex, henry, nora, and ellen were perfect, and taylor/nicholas had amazing chemistry.

[mermaidsirennikita]

I read both contemporary and historical romances and I feel like ice queen heroines are extremely underrated. Do you have any recommendations? Thank you!

I loooove an ice queen! Like, I honestly prefer ice queen heroines to sweet heroines.

Historical:

When a Duke Loves a Woman by Lorraine Heath. This heroine isn't so icy to her family, but she is icy to men otherwise because she basically thinks they're trouble who just want to love 'em and leave 'em (often with consequences for the woman) and tbh? She ain't wrong. But then she rescued the hero after he's mugged and cares for him and he sees her tits and the rest is history

Any Duke in a Storm by Amalie Howard. This is a PIRATICAL ICE QUEEN (but she's also a spy). She has a hero who's like a dangerous rakish borderline himbo and he's like "yes? we do sex? we do sex and kiss and things?" and she's like "NO WE DO NOT" (they do)

Lord of Temptation by Lorraine Heath. This is of the "aloof because she's trying to be a lady and also her heart is hurt" variety. She meets the hero (another borderline pirate but also a lord) when she's on a trip to visit her fiancee and he's VERY rakish and VERY seductive and yes there is sex on a boat and later a lot of scenes where he climbs into her room to tear it up by via a tree.

Joss and The Countess by S.M. LaVioelette. One of my favorite ice queen heroines! Alicia is twice-widowed and is exploring London to try to find a lover who actually pleases her (because neither of her husbands did). She's basically been fucking the wrong dudes and so she thinks she's frigid, until the servant she's been using as a bodyguard, Joss (who is a former sex worker) basically sticks his hand up there one night and is like "YOU WANT A BIT O' ROUGH?" because Joss is very dominant and can sense that what Alicia really wants is to be tossed around a bit. (How true of her.) It's actually kinda tense at first because he thinks she just wants him to service her and he's catching feelings but gasp she's catching them too. Also an older heroine/younger hero book (she's 39 I believe and he's around 27). Melissa and The Vicar comes before this and also features a frosty heroine (who is older than her virgin hero) but Magnus is more sweet and Melissa isn't quite as icy as Alicia, just super jaded. Both books, I should add, have discussion of past sexual abuse.

For My Lady's Heart by Laura Kinsale. And WHAT an icy heroine. Melanthe is a widowed princess who's known for having a heart of stone (and being a manipulative backstabber). She ends up being escorted on a perilous journey by a knight who idolized her for 13 years and developed this romanticized idea of her from afar and is quite... disappointed in her true personality lol. At first. Until he gets to know THE REAL HER. TW for medieval-accurate discussions of sexual assault, etc. Kinsale makes her characters have very accurate attitudes, and that can be intense but it's SO worth it.

The Dueling Duchess by Minerva Spencer. This heroine, who is a sharpshooter in a circus of women, has a very traumatic French Revolution-related backstory that leads her to being super aloof and jaded, which is hard because the hero, with whom she used to have a casual situationship, is a lovable rogue who reeeeally wants her back and For Srs.

Private Arrangements by Sherry Thomas. This heroine is known as this sort of jaded icy vamp, and she and her husband have been separated for ten years (basically since the day after the wedding). She asks for a divorce so that she can marry her lover, and he's like "hmmm give me an heir first", so they agree to fuck it out until she's pregnant and the baby is born. Very emotional.

Once More, My Darling Rogue by Lorraine Heath. This book has an ice queen who's really also just a brat lol. She treats the hero like shit because he's a former street kid who was adopted by a duke and duchess. Then he fishes her out of a river and she has amnesia, and he has the bright idea to wreak revenge by telling her she's his housekeeper lmao and making her wash his back and shit. But it's only supposed to be for a week! Then he'll tell her the truth... (If you've seen Overboard, this is that but historical.) TW for past sexual abuse.

The Perfect Crimes of Marian Hayes by Cat Sebastian. This heroine is aloof and icy because she was married to an asshole. Little does she know that the guy sending her blackmail letters is that asshole's secret son. Also, she doesn't realize that the blackmailer is falling in love with her through their back and forth letters (because she's like nice try dumbass and it turns into a correspondence). Adventure ensues. She also has a baby, and I like that though she loves the baby, it doesn't diminish her ice queen-ness? Like, she is still rather aloof and caring but not cuddly.

Waking Up with the Duke by Lorraine Heath. Lorraine does love an ice queen and Jayne is one of her best. She's kind but has sort of been made frosty by trauma. Her husband had a carriage accident that rendered him impotent, and she miscarried shortly after and has been caring for him since. The issue is that he doesn't give her any romance or really affection. But then he asks his best friend, a NOTORIOUSLY GREAT IN BED MAN to sleep with Jayne and get her pregnant so that he can have an heir and Jayne can have the baby she's always wanted. She agrees reluctantly... BUT NO KISSING. Such an amazing melting ice queen book.

Between the Devil and Desire by Lorraine Heath. Another all time favorite, and another fabulous heroine. Really, one of my top heroines. Olivia is another one whose husband was nice but not emotionally or physically there for her, and now she's widowed with a young son. But then, notorious gambling hell owner Jack Dodger is named as her son's guardian in her husband's will, even though he barely knew this man! It's so great to see this haughty ice queen get turned into an emotional mess by like, the first man who's ever gotten her going. It's really a sexual awakening book in a lot of ways because Olivia goes from being "GET AWAY FROM ME POOR" to drunkenly telling him that HE MUST NOT KISS HER knowing that her always does the opposite of what she asks lmao

When a Rogue Meets His Match by Elizabeth Hoyt. This heroine, who I kid you not is named Messalina, hates the hero a lot because he's her evil uncle's fixer. The evil uncle knows he wants her, so he's like "do this last job and you can have her". But she's determined to have her revenge. I read this when I was first getting back into romance and I really need to reread because I remember it being bonkers lol

Duchess by Day, Mistress by Night by Stacy Reid. Icy renowned widowed duchess with a young son hires this lowborn fixer type to find her son's governess after she goes missing. And he's like "okay.... but I don't want money in return....." Cue BIG awakening.

Sweetest Scoundrel by Elizabeth Hoyt. TW big time because the heroine is known as an ice queen and this is part due to her trauma surrounding childhood abuse. It is another huge favorite of mine, however. The hero is trying to start a pleasure garden, and the heroine basically sweeps in like "oh no you fucking don't" because her brother is his patron (I think) and she's handling her brother's affairs. The hero, a major rake type, is like "you bitch" but gradually gets to know her and realizes what's going on and starts helping her get comfortable with sex and men. It's honestly both very hot and VERY sweet, and it's this very gradual escalation that begins with a lot of mutual masturbation lol. And also a scene in which they're in a moving carriage and he realizes she's looking at his dick and he's like "I mean I can jack off in front of you if you want" and she's like "I WANT". One of the hottest scenes I've ever read tbh.

Contemporary:

The Hot Shot by Kristen Callihan. The hero is a rookie phenom quarterback, and the heroine is the photographer in charge of shooting this nude calendar starring the team. She's very frosty to him, but they become friends and then ROOMMATES and then slowly they work towards acknowledging their own trauma and stuff. TW because this is one deals with things like infertility, and especially his own trauma about a later-term pregnancy loss he experienced with another woman. I was actually really impressed with it tbh, because you rarely see pregnancy loss discussed from a hero's POV.

Salt in the Wound/Salt Kiss by Sierra Simone. Salt in the Wound is the prequel novella (kind of a long novella lol) from the heroine's POV, whereas she's majorly present in the back third of Salt Kiss but it's from the hero's POV. Would recommend reading in order. Isolde is a total ice queen, but she has this secret dark side... and a kinky, masochistic side. This is MMF, I discuss it a lot lol, but I really like the contrasting sides of her with Mark, who's similarly icy and very dominant, and Tristan, who's submissive with Mark but kinda like... dominant in the bedroom with Isolde, and soft out of the bedroom with her. Tristan also calls her "honey" DURING. A lot. And boy did that unexpectedly work for me.

Jana Goes Wild by Farah Heron. Love this one, the heroine had a fling with the hero in the past before finding out he was married (!) and then she turns out to be pregnant. Flash forward five years and they're polite coparents who end up in the same destination wedding party. She's understandably QUITE cold to him, but.... feelings arise.........

Lush Money by Angelina M. Lopez. This is the one with the billionaire heroine who offers to bail out the prince hero's tiny country in exchange for him marrying and impregnating her. Roxanne is a fabulously difficult, icy heroine who slooowly begins to melt.