#i will keep u posted on the sound quality

[toytulini]

i do love my car it is the perfect car aside from the. imperfections and frequent problems,

[brighttears]

Finally

Joel Miller x f!reader

No physical description except female sex organs and having hair, no use of y/n

Summary: After losing contact with your lover Joel and his brother for five years, Tommy finds you and brings you into Jackson. You reunite with Joel but it doesn't take long for him to project his insecurity onto you. You talk to Tommy about it until Joel comes and finds you. You have make up sex/five years overdue sex, and end with a shower that eases some feelings out of you as you relax in your new home with Joel

Word count: 7.7k

Warnings: (18+, MINORS DNI) PIV unprotected sex, creampie, mating press, slight hair pulling, slight edging, dirty talk, Joel has a big ol weiner, pet names (baby, babygirl, good girl, sweet girl, darling, my love), you and Joel have an argument, ‘slut’ used derogatorily, accused cheating, brief drinking, kind of insecure!Joel, Tess doesn’t exist

A/n: this is the longest it’s ever taken me to post anything lol (and also the longest thing i’ve written i think?). the quality will not correlate I was messing around with like four other ideas this is the just the only one that got somewhere, also been having way less time to write and that will probably continue 3: also finally did smut (for the one person who has said they want me to lol love u)

—

Riding up to the gates of Jackson, you feel like a teenager on their first day of high school, distractingly nervous but drifted forward by hopeful butterflies. You grip the leather reins and look to Tommy riding beside you, he grants you a reassuring grin. In front of you, the gates, made of lines of thick logs with a large rusty lock, start to groan open. Tommy slips through before you and you follow him into a different world—a ghost and dream, lit up by string lights, appearing warm despite the winter, healthy and alive. Your focus, however, concentrates on the faces, many of which are looking back at your new one. Flicking from one to the next, your heart rises and falls with every one that isn’t Joel’s. Tommy’s promise has your senses perked up like an animal. 

Ahead of you on the road, you double take a man with his back to you. Despite this and his hair being too gray, his posture and step are unmistakable. 

“Joel,” you utter, soft, a reaction rather than a call out; it croaks out of your throat, dusty from all its time stuck there. Awakened, his name erupts from you then, “Joel,” 

The man stops dead, then whirls around, and you stop breathing because it is him. Unable to look away, you stumble off of your horse and begin to walk towards him. It’s silent, almost frighteningly so, even if it’s just in your head, because it makes it feel like a dream, like if you so much as blink he’ll be gone or you’ll be awake. 

Joel mirrors you, then jogs, you feel hot tears behind your eyes, and then you collide, grabbing at each other like you’re making up for every lost embrace from the past five years apart. He makes a sound, holding you with his cheek on the side of your head. You shake once with a cry, a mixture of shock that keeps your eyes wide open, though blind, actualization flowing through you and into your fingers digging into his thick coat and tangling in his hair, dregs of sorrow and resentment against time finally detaching like leeches, and love, powerfully swirling around everything inside of you. 

Then you hear his voice for the first time, “Oh, baby,” and your eyes squeeze shut and you start to cry, and he holds you tighter. You can’t stop it, fueled by relief in the intense familiarity of the pressure of his arms, his scent, his voice, the way he breathes. 

Once you’re breathing properly, Joel pulls away, holding your waist. He looks you over, making sure you’re real and here, and when you are, he slips a hand under your jaw and pulls your wet face into a kiss. For a moment your lips are simply pressed, frozen, overwhelmed, and then they move, and you kiss starved, revived. The feeling of sanctuary rekindling floods you, your face quivering with tears, and you have to pull apart for a breath. 

And Joel is still here, and you hold his face in your hands because he’s so beautiful and he’s finally here. You take in each other’s new features—wrinkles, grays, scars. You slide your thumb over his cheek, feeling his rough skin, and then you meet in the stars in each other’s blown out pupils. 

Simultaneously, you start to giggle, giddy, and then you guffaw, holding each other, and Joel pulls you back in. Tightly, he sways you like a doll, and you feel his laughter through his body like against a speaker playing heavy base. Being in his arms feels like life being unpaused. 

“Tommy!” He cries over your shoulder, still laughing, “Where the fuck did’you find ‘er?” Still held tightly against him, you can’t hear Tommy’s response, but then Joel repeats “Oh, baby.” and leans his head down to loudly kiss the side of your face.

You pull away and admire him. No image that you’d drawn up in your imagination compares to Joel in the flesh. Running your hand through his longer, silvered hair, you realize just how much you were missing out on. 

“I found you.” You whisper. 

He chuckles with a wide smile, “You found me.” And then takes you back to him, “I missed you so much, baby.” 

“I missed you to death.” You mumble into him. 

Tommy’s voice sounds nearby, chuckling “Don’t smother ‘er to death, we just got ‘er back!” You part and turn to look at him with a rawly genuine grin. A sincere smile curves back. You thank him through your eyes and he nods. Joel strides past you to hug his brother, long and meaningful. 

Then he turns to you, hand still on Tommy’s shoulder, and looks you up and down. “Come on, you must be freezin’, I’ll take you up to the house.”

“The house?” You question as he guides you back up the road.

“The house.” He confirms with an amiable smirk, hugging you to his side by an arm wrapped around you. 

—

“I know, I know!” Joel enthuses as he closes the door behind you, watching you turn in a circle, mouth agape, taking in the house, which is actually fully intact, walls and furniture alike, basically clean. It smells like Joel and his jacket hangs on the pegboard on the wall next to the door. An acoustic guitar leans against the couch, which has a blanket hung over the back, there’s a mug out on the table, probably still half full and cold—this is Joel’s house. 

“Look, look,” he calls and rushes to the kitchen sink. He turns the handle and water flows out in a powerful stream, and you stride over, mouth still open in astonishment. You put your hand under the faucet and feel the water heating up. 

“Hot water!?” You cry, and you both burst out laughing again in joyful gratitude. You stop suddenly and Joel turns off the faucet. “Does this mean… shower?” Joel gives you a dramatic frown, raising his brows and shrugging, then nods his head to the stairs. Tugging at his arm, you cry out his name, thrilled. He takes off and you race him up the steps. 

“I can get’chou some clean clothes easy—how long you been wearing those?” 

“Disturbingly long.” 

Joel laughs. “You meet Tommy’s wife yet?” He looks back at you shaking your head as he opens his bedroom door, “Well, she’ll take care a ya’.” He steps into the middle of the room and turns back to you and you magnetize, holding each other by your arms. “Man, when I first got here I just kept thinkin’ how much you’d love this place.” 

The image of that almost makes you blush and your heart swells, knowing that he was still yours while you were gone, playing house with an imaginary you. “Damn straight I do. Fuck, you’ve just been livin’ it up.” Looking over his face, you’re beginning to relearn it. 

“Well, I am now.” His expression shifts from excitement into contentment and he murmurs, “I missed you so much, baby,” 

Fitting together comfortably, you join for a kiss. 

The calm of the room allows you to experience your feelings wholly, inside and out; thus, a shared heat is overt and you strip your jackets, not parting lips and hurriedly reattaching your bodies. 

“Shit,” you breathe out, craving him and finally being satisfied at the same time as his warm, powerful hands move over you, sliding up and down your sides, your back, up your forearm as your hand brushes over his face and into his hair and with your other you squeeze his thick bicep. He walks you into the wall, clutching your middle to him with an arm wrapped around you. His other hand drags from your face down your neck, flush against your skin as he continues slowly lowering it further, past your collarbone. Your chest expanding in a deep breath lifts it into his hand and Joel swears, then repeats in a murmur, “I missed you so much baby.” You respond with a whimper and wetter kiss, pulling him ever closer, and he swears again, the hand on your back clenching the fabric of your shirt. Then he moves it to the underside of your leg, between your thigh and your ass, and lifts, holding your thigh next to his leg with your foot dangling, toes curling in your boot. Truth is, no one has touched you since Joel, save for yourself, so he’s driving you crazy right now.

Your mouths together compose a natural melody, one motion rolling into the next, constantly finding and looking for more and you’re obsessed again with his flavor. If this lasted forever you wouldn’t even notice. But, just as he moans into your lips, Joel suddenly pulls back and holds you away by your waist.

You rest your hands on his forearms. “Joel?” You inquire, catching your breath, and then slide a hand over his cheek and under his chin to lift his head, looking for some kind of communication from his expression. He meets your eyes for only a second before he lets go of you completely, turning away and walking to the other side of the room. 

You stay where you are, granting him space. “Joel? What’s wrong?” He turns to you but his head is bowed. “…Joel?” Anxiety scratches at your heart and you wipe your mouth. 

Sighing heavily, he slowly rubs his hand over his face before finally speaking up, “Look… before we… go any further, I gotta ask…” he leans his hand on the short dresser and when he looks up his expression is unexpectedly serious. “Is there someone else?”

It takes you a couple seconds to put it together, but you ask anyway, just to make sure, “…What do you mean?”

Instantly, he replies, “You know what I mean.” Firmer this time, he repeats, “Is there someone else?” Confounded, you’re tongue tied, and he takes it as confirmation of his suspicions. “There is, isn’t there?” He almost sneers.

The atmosphere has shifted dramatically; just a few minutes ago he was laughing brightly with you, and about thirty seconds ago he was caressing you, amorous and loving.

“Are you joking?” Joel’s face says ‘what do you think?’ and you screw your own face up. “Are you asking me if I have some secret partner?” You ask once again just to be sure. He says nothing, only looks on unrelentingly and puts his hands on his hips, bent knee sticking out. You laugh coldly. “Holy shit.”

Near monotone, he asks, “Why’s that funny?”

“I just—wasn’t expecting this, at all, I mean this is just… do you realize how much of a jackass you’re being right now?” You pause, he says nothing. “Well, I’m not having a fucking affair. Okay? Jesus.” 

Joel huffs, keeping stoney eye contact, and grinds his teeth. You let him brew in the silence. Still, after all this time, you can read him like a book—he has convinced himself that you found someone better while he was gone and have come back only to blow sand in his eyes, and then you’re going to run off to your new, superior lover, leaving him on his ass in the mud. And although he doesn’t want it to be true, he always puts so much faith into awful assumptions, and he hates being wrong. 

You sigh in understanding but speak to him sternly, “Joel, you are making this shit up in your head and just putting it on me. That’s not fair. Don’t do this. There’s no reason to do this.”

Defensively, he suddenly raises his voice, “I jus’ wanna make sure I’m not steppin’ on any toes.” With a bite, he finishes, “I’m jus’ sayin’, if there is someone else, now’s the time to leave.” 

Your expression turns unsympathetic, brow pinched and mouth parted in amazement, and then you counter venomously, “I don’t know who you think I am. I don’t know what kind of twisted version of me you’ve created in your head. Are you trying to call me a fucking slut? That’s the kind of narrative you've thought up? That’s what you’ve been thinking about while I’ve been gone—me betraying you?”

Joel’s eyes are closed and his head is shaking before you even finish, pinching his brow with two fingers, “No, no,”

You cut right back in, “Alright, well that’s what it fucking sounds like to me so I am going to leave now—not to run off to some paramour,” you spit, “but because you’re being a fucking asshole and need to run this one back through before you talk to me again.” 

“W–wait,” He tries, but you’ve already spun on your heel, snatching up your jacket, and rush out with heavy footsteps. You don’t bother closing his front door behind you and don’t look back, not hearing anything either. 

You don’t know this town yet, but you keep the same pace you left Joel’s with and just follow the road, packed white with hard snow. The sharp air makes your eyes water and you swipe your hands at them blurring your vision. Your breaths, fast with your fiery heartbeat, blow steamy clouds like puffs of white smoke. 

You stop the first passerby you see, “There’s a bar here, right?” Your tongue hasn’t fully cooled yet and you try not to sound harsh. You’re almost out of breath. 

“Yeah,” the tall woman’s voice is mousy and she tucks stray black hair into her hat, then turns and points, “just follow this road, you’ll come to Main Street, it’ll be on your right.” As she turns her head back to you she adds, “It’s called the Tispy Bison.”

“Thank you.” you nod, do your best to smile, and continue on.

—

A rush of warm air blows out through the door swinging open and your nose starts to run as you step into the Tipsy Bison. It appears very ‘American’ themed, with its warm, inoffensively red walls, everything country–style wood, and taxidermy wall mounts. Crowning bright soda fridges are neon red Coca–Cola logos. A few lively groups are scattered about, talking and laughing. Blinking into the reality of the massive dining hall, you wipe your nose with your sleeve; it’s so much like the world before and for some reason it intimidates you. As you scan the room, you spot Tommy at the bar and remember you’re thirsty.

He smiles when he notices you approaching but it fades and he furrows his brow as he regards your expression. You slip into the chair next to him and he turns his torso to face you, one arm resting over the back of his seat, the other on the bar with a beer in his hand.

A gravelly voice from behind the bar asks, “What can I get ya?” and you turn to a friendly looking woman with thick, coily hair and dark teeth.

“Surprise me.”

“Gotcha. Comin’ right up.” She smiles and moves away. 

Turning your attention back to Tommy, his brow is still furrowed, as it is most of the time, really, and he bites his lip. “Trouble in paradise?”

You turn forward to rest your elbows on the bar and slide your head through your hands, pulling your cheeks, then resting them on the sides of your head. “Your brother’s being a little shit.”

He chuckles. “Yeah, he’s pretty good at that. What’e’do?”

During the time you’d been with Joel, you became close with his brother, too. Tommy has always been easy to talk to and you pick right up where you left off. It’s nice to have someone to talk candidly to about Joel, and you’re sure he feels the same. 

“Same kind of shit he always does—assume the worst in everyone and stick them with it for no fucking reason.”

“Yeah, that’s pretty classic Joel.” He sips his beer and smacks his lips. “You know he does really love you, though.”

“No, I know, I mean, I can tell even with this,” you remove your hands from your head and turn to him, “he’s accusing me of having ‘someone else’,” you air quote as you confide, “like I’m having a fucking affair. Came outta nowhere.” Looking to the side to blow out a breath, your eyes automatically flick around your surroundings.

“He’s just insecure.”

“I know. It’s not like I’m cutting him off or anything, and I want to stay in Jackson, I just told him to… cool off, in so many words. You know I love him too, I just had to fucking leave.” 

Just then, the voice sounds again beside you, “Here’s that surprise for ya.” She places a short, ribbed glass in front of you, a blood orange drink on the rocks. 

“Thank you.” You immediately take a swig and it’s bittersweet and smooth. 

As you do, Tommy says, “Yeah, good call. He just needs to get checked sometimes, y’know? He’ll figure it out. He’s just… yeah, he’s insecure.”

Looking down into your drink, you add, “He hates himself.” and spin the glass over the smooth bar. “That’s his worst quality. That’s the only thing I would change about him.”

Tommy sighs. “I think what makes it worse for him is how much he loves you.” He shakes his head, “He just gets so damn scared. He has no idea how strong he is, how good he is… I think we see a real different version of him than he does.” You nod. There’s a beat of silence before he continues, “It’s just… loss, y’know? It’s like he just wants’t’ beat it to the punch. He always feels like he’s doin’ sum’n wrong. Always thinkin’ it’s his fault.” 

You nod again. “You said it: he sees a real different version of himself than we do. I just wish I could…” you suck your teeth and turn to him, “I keep trying to talk him out of it, you know? Do you think that works?”

He looks down to think for a while, then looks back at you and concludes, “I think… it’s gotta be him.” 

You nod, “Yeah, I know what you mean.” 

To lighten the mood, Tommy smiles, “Well, don’tchou worry, he’ll be crawlin’ back t’you with his tail between his legs any second now.” You ‘psh’, looking ahead and admiring the warm-toned colored bottles shelved on the wall. Then he adds, “You’ll never lose ‘im, you know.”

You sip your drink and roll his words around with it, full, mellow, but strongly bittersweet. You and Joel had been separated for a long time, wherein all you had was faith, and you gripped that rope tight and never let go, just like he would for you, just like he did for Tommy. Joel has yet to let you down—he’s fucked up many times, but he’s never let you down, because he puts his heart into everything he does; it’s maybe his most admirable and most troubling trait. He loves so hard it hurts, sometimes not just him. You’ll never run out of patience though, because he’s your Joel, and you love him to death. He hit you like a bullet, quick and good, and he’s lodged somewhere inside of you, unretrievable. 

“Speak a the devil.” Tommy’s voice breaks you out of reflection, looking past you, and you turn to see Joel, halfway in the doorway, devastating eyes and all. For a moment you just watch him, awkward in the doorway, admiring his presence, but you keep a straight, neutral face. You look back at Tommy as you take a last swig of your drink and he smiles with understanding eyes. 

Hopping down from your stool and strolling towards Joel, you have to bite hard back a smile, though you’re still pissed. Catching him doing the same, you briefly question why you have to do this dance instead of just leaping back into each other, mixing into your color and staying like that in his bed, which must be so soft and comfortable and warm with him in it. He is so god damn beautiful and it’s been so long that your hands twist nervously behind your back and you feel yourself blushing, so you turn your head down as you near him. You have good reason to show him you’re upset, though—the dance is important. 

“Can we talk?” He asks you, voice entirely soft. 

You look up at him, pause, and then nod. Joel turns back outside slowly and does more than he needs to to hold the door for you.

Winter is near its end but you’ve arrived just in time for a cold snap; the wind has picked up significantly in the short time you’ve been inside, icey and sharp, and you bend your head down against it and hug yourself. Joel starts to put his arm around you but pulls away, glancing at you with awkward steps towards his house. 

“Hold me.” You answer, so he does, arm around your shoulders, curving himself around you as the wind whips. The man is a living furnace, you can feel it even like this. 

—

It’s silent until you’re back in Joel’s house, too cold and windy for any kind of conversation. Adjusting to the indoors, you both blow out sighs, and Joel impulsively helps you out of your coat and hangs it on the peg next to his on the wall by the door. Then he just stands awkwardly; he’s never been good at this. What’s important, though, is that he’s trying. Waiting patiently for him to gather his thoughts, you lean against a wall with your hands behind your back. After a moment, he looks around, sucking his teeth, and then moves ungainly to sit in a chair at the table. You follow and sit across from him. More silence, he fiddles with his hands on the table in front of him and grinds his teeth. Under the table, you run a finger back and forth over the wood’s grooves on its apron. 

“Okay,” he starts, then pauses, keeping his gaze on his hands. “I’m sorry.” His voice sounds rehearsed, like he said ‘I’m sorry’ in his head twenty times before he spoke it. “I was wrong. I didn’t mean t’… I mean I’d be pissed too, if you said sum’n like that to me. I know that’s not you. I was jus’… scared,” he wills the word out, looking off to some spot on the floor, “You’re right, I,” he pauses, then motions his hand up in circles next to his head, “I jus’, made this whole story up in my head. I mean we haven’t even talked about, y’know, what’s happened in the past five years. I have no idea what you did or didn’t do, and it’s not my business unless you want it to be. I jus’, I don’t know,” he shifts back in his chair and fiddles with his hands again, “I was just afraid that y’d… forgott’n about me or found someone better or, uhh…y–y–”

Watching him start to fumble over his words, you decide that now is an ok time to cut in, starting quiet and gentle, “I didn’t.” Joel looks at you as you speak, his brow furrowed up. “I never forgot about you. I thought about you every day. I was scared, too, I didn’t know anything about how you were doing or where you were, I didn’t know if I was ever gonna see you again, but I just lived like I would. I couldn’t let you go. I couldn’t, I wasn’t able to. And there’s no one better, Joel,” you slide your hand over the table to take one of his. He unclasps them to fold it in and watches his thumb stroke over your hand. “You are the only one. What I feel for you can’t be touched. Even if I tried, I don’t think I could be with anyone else. But I didn’t try. All I did was miss you.”

At that, Joel takes your hand with both of his, taking a deep breath, and then leans in to place soft kisses over your knuckles, peering up at you as he does. A bolt in your core throbs heat into the rest of your body and you feel slightly dizzy. Again, you haven't had any kind of touch like this since the last time you were with Joel, so you’re starving for it, but above all, for Joel. His lips are gentle, his hands are warm and burly folded around yours. 

You slip your hand out of his and get up from the table. He watches you walk to his side to fix your level of separation and he stands and joins you back into an embrace. 

You sink into each other, bodies and minds fusing as if you were never apart. You match temperatures so all you feel is the pressure of his hands sliding up your back, under your shirt. In his hold, your back is arched and your hips are met; there’s barely any space between your bodies at all. You hold onto his face, running your hands over it, messing up his hair, focusing on his lips, letting him do the work on your body. Joel places a hand on the front of your thigh and starts slowly dragging it up. You twitch under it, desire like a lightning storm around under his touch. You nearly jerk into it and he finally slides his broad hand flush between your thighs. Your head falls back and he doesn’t miss a beat, moving his lips on your neck, and it forces a moan out of you. 

“You like that?” He says into your skin, barely out of a kiss, nose pressed against it. 

“Yes,” you whine, “please, oh my god.”

You feel Joel smile into your neck and he nips it. “Jump up.” You do, his hands out and ready to catch your thighs. This was a regular trick of yours and apparently your bodies haven’t forgotten it. As he starts for the stairs, you lean yourself over his shoulder. The placement of his hands are in both the best and worst spot, splayed just barely over every area you want him to touch. You hold onto his neck as he brings you upstairs and laugh when he kicks his bedroom door open, making it bang loudly against the wall. Once you drop back down to the ground, you connect your mouths again and immediately start to strip. While you struggle with the buttons on his shirt he undoes his belt and jeans and then yours. You rip his flannel off of him, annoyed at it, and then slide your hands under his shirt. You feel over his chest, around his back, and up his sides, relishing in it, and he chuckles into your lips before helping you pull it off. He wastes no time on your shirt, loving that you’re braless, caressing your chest, and then pulls you in, pressing your bare fronts together. You moan in the satisfaction of feeling him like this again. His calloused hands run smoothly up your back and on their way down pass briefly under your waistband. You raise him by slipping your hand all the way into his jeans, cupping his hardening cock. He swears into your mouth as you find hold of it. It electrifies you further, having forgotten about this part of him. Quickening breaths deepen the rise and fall of your chest against his.

He pulls his lips from yours and his voice is gruff when he says, “You’re killin’ me darlin’.”

The tone and the way he’s hardening in your hands is driving you wildly lustful and you tell him frankly, voice pitched high, “I want you so bad Joel I love your cock I need you to fuck me,” all of this wet into his lips. 

Immediately, Joel tugs down your pants, but when they’re at your knees, he pulls away to look at you and he says “Boots.” You both laugh breathily and sit down on the edge of his bed—your pants still halfway down—undoing your laces hastily. He finishes first and then helps you untie the laces of your other shoe, both of you chuckling with heavy breaths. You kick them off and then Joel moves in front of you, taking hold of the cuffs of your jeans to pull them off. Once they are, in one swift motion, he opens your legs up with his in between them, and, still standing but leaning over you on the bed, he slips his hand back between your legs. He places it flush against you through your underwear, which would be embarrassingly dirty, but who fucking cares? They’ll be gone soon anyway. Joel’s mouth opens amorously, watching your eyes as you let out a long, embarrassingly pornographic moan at the raw enough contact. He slides down deeper, the heel of his hand pressing lightly and thrillingly on your clit and you gasp into another moan. He grins and then leans his head down to your neck, dragging his tongue up its full length.

“Fuck,” you drawl involuntarily as a shiver runs through you and you hook your arms under his to claw his back. When Joel slides his hand back up between your legs, wetness seeps from your slit. Joel chuckles erotically, his breath over the line of his saliva on your neck making it worse and your legs open wider. The heat under his hand matches that in your chest and your breaths are more desperate in want of him.

Fed up of him taking it so slow, you slide your hands under him and push him up, holding onto his biceps to pull you up with him as he stands, and lick into his mouth. Your other hand goes straight into his pants and under his briefs, teasing him like he had you. When he moans into your mouth you squeeze only slightly and then slowly move your hand up until your thumb comes to the spot just before the underside of his tip. You begin working it like that, teasing him wet and sensitive in your hand. 

Joel pulls his face away from yours, eyes closed, and breathes out “Shit.” He squeezes the arm reached down and moves his hips into your hand. You keep at it, biting your lip watching him. “Ah, oh, fuck,” he mumbles, almost sluring his words, and warns, “If you don’t stop I’m gonna cum,” when you do stop, he groans. 

Bringing your hand away from him, you settle it on his belly and wrap your other arm around his neck to nuzzle your face into it and mumble, “I missed your cock so much, I miss feeling it, I wanna see you cum,”

“Fuck.” Joel states, then commands, “Lay back on the bed.” You do as you’re told, propping yourself up with your forearms behind you on the bed and watch him drop his pants. Finally naked, his cock bounces to flip onto his stomach, reaching just under his belly button; dark curls hide everything else. Your sigh is almost a moan just looking at him, like a meaty roman sculpture of the exemplary man. His brow shadows sultry eyes and, like an animal in heat, you open your legs, peering up at him needily.

He slowly crawls over you and whispers, “Move up for me darlin’,” nodding his head to the side for you to lay properly on the bed, head on his pillow. He reaches past you to click on the bedside lamp and then sits up on his knees, admiring you under the golden–yellow light. He places a large hand on your stomach, adding pressure as he slivers it up to fondle your chest.

You appreciate the sentiment, but you have plenty of time for slow, worship sex, and right now, “Joel please I need you to fuck me,”

Smirking, he growls, “Since you asked so nice,” and lowers himself onto you, kissing sluggishly. He doesn’t bother to remove his face from against yours to take your underwear off, just tugs at them until they find their way to slip off. Then, as he positions himself, your thigh slides over his—it’s small, but something about it makes you sigh sensually.

“You ready for me baby?” Joel asks, hovering his lips over yours.

You could come up with some clever remark but now is not the time, so you simply whine, “Yes, Joel, please, I need you,”

“Yeah?” He says, low and lazy, and then moans softly as he eases his thick length into you. Deep satisfaction flows through you as he fills you up, humming and moaning. Your foreheads press together as you adjust, both your mouths wide open, and Joel’s fist clutches the sheets next to your head. He brings himself back out slowly until only his tip is inside you, and then his free hand clutches your side as if to hold you in place as he reinserts himself and begins thrusting, now only barely pulling any length out before plunging back in. Your lungs jump and clumsy moans pour out of you as the force of it rocks your hips. 

Joel licks your cheek and then, grabbing hold of your hips to keep himself inside you, pulls himself to sit on his knees. Stretching your arms up, you bear yourself to him, and his mouth has yet to close. He bites his lip before starting to fuck you again, both harder and faster, holding your lower back completely off of the bed. 

“Only me, huh?” He says, breaths bumping as he drives himself into you, “I’m the only one that touches you?”

“Yes,” you moan out. 

“You touched yourself, though did’n you?” You answer in the same way, “You thought about me while you did, huh?” 

“Uh-huh,” you sound, high pitched as he starts to fuck you harder. 

“Did it feel this good?”

“No,” your drawn out answer catches with the force of his hips pounding against you. 

Joel’s head falls back as he speeds up and you already feel yourself start to constrict around him. 

“Shit,” he looks back down at you, hums aggressively, and slows his pace dramatically. “No baby, not yet, not yet.” As he pulls out fully, precum flicks onto your stomach and he drops your hips. Back down on top of you, your body weighs into the bed under his and your mouths bond again.

Joel can’t keep his cock out of you for long, though, keeping up messy kisses, each rolling into the next in a flux, he shoves his hand down to slip back into you and fucks a quick tempo that makes the bed creak. One of his hands stays planted on the bed next to your head and the other goes back to hold your hip, pulling you into him with each of his thrusts. Angled slightly up inside of you, he hits a spot that produces a guttural moan from you, and while your mouth is wide open with it, Joel doesn’t quit biting and licking at your lips. 

Your body reacts without you, your hand slithering over him—up his arms, his torso, his back, one landing to grip his hair and the other reaching at his hip. The way he bucks into you now hinders your ability to kiss but your faces rub and touch, sharing the same hot air, moaning over each other. 

After one loud, long moan, Joel pulls out of you again in a swift motion, moaning through pants. 

“Joel why the fuck do you keep stopping,” you slap your palms on his chest in frustration, legs still spread under him. 

“Well I js’ don’t wanna cum too fast,” he answers innocently.

“Joel I have been waiting five years…” he starts to chuckle and you smile, “for you to cum.” You slap his chest again and then decide to take this matter into your own hands, pushing him up to get yourself on top. You straddle him, his cock resting stiff and shining on his stomach. Back up at his face, you look into dark eyes, his lips parted with heavy breaths, and you slide your fingers through his hair, gripping a bunch, silver strands highlighted in the light. Keeping eye contact, Joel’s fingers trail lightly down either of your sides as you sit up, sliding his joystick into your hold, and he hums as you sit down on it. After adjusting to his throbbing size, you come up and back down slowly a few times, and then begin swinging your hips to fuck him. A loud, long moan cracks out of him and he closes his eyes and seizes your hips. You release his hair and instead hold into his thick, veiny forearms like handlebars as you accelerate. He moans, long and loud again, and, keeping up a beat with your hips, you lay down on him, pressing your body against his, and eat the moans from his mouth. He adjusts his hold by wrapping an arm around the middle of your back to hold you down and squeezing your ass with the other as if to help your hips along. To keep yourself stabilized enough to keep your mouths together—you could barely call it kissing anymore, just sliding tongues and lips however you can—you plant your hands on the bed with your arms like you would doing a pushup. 

Even though you’re on top, Joel is in control now, holding you to fuck up into you.

He angles his head down so that your foreheads stay pressed but he can speak, “Fuck babygirl you feel so good, so fuckin’ tight, I fill you up so good, huh? Pussy’s just for me to cum in, huh? All fr’ me? All mine? Can you tell me you’re all mine?” His words and breaths catch with the rhythm of the surging flux of your bodies rolling together. You feel his muscles jolting in his lower abdomen as he drives in and out and those in his arm twitching against your back with the force of it. The way he fills you is carnally satisfying and overdue and you never want it to stop.

“Yes, yes, all yours, all for you, my pussy’s all for you—fuuck—yours, my pussy belongs to you,”

“Thas’ right, babygirl, you belong to me.” He takes your bottom lip with his teeth and pulls your mouth back to roll his tongue into and unfurls his arm around you to grasp a bundle of hair. 

Suddenly, he maneuvers you to flump your back on the bed, bringing himself back on top, and immediately stuffs himself back into you. He grips your hips again to fuck you like he was before, controlling you like a doll, and you grab onto his wrists.

“Fuck, babygirl,” he continues, fucking with an immediately brutal pace, hitting you somewhere deep and perfect but he’s talking over you too much to be able to tell him you’re going to cum, “I was so spolied, I didn’ realize how spoiled I was with this lil’ pussy,” he bumps you hard and rough a couple times to emphasize, “perfect lil’ pussy on my perfect lil’ girl, my sweet girl, so good to me,” Joel tilts forward, keeping himself securely deep between your legs, and releases one of your hips—which you would not be surprised to be bruised exactly in the form of his fingers—to stroke his hand over your cheek, and then gently hooks his thumb in your mouth, pulling your lip out to the side. “Now I get t’ fuck you every fuckin’ night, cause you’re all mine n’ I’m all yours, gonna make you cum every fuckin’ night,” your hips inadvertently lurch against him and you bark a moan and his thumb trails out of your mouth as your head leans back onto the bed. You haven’t had your body move like this in awhile, an animal in and of itself, innately greedy for its mate. Joel sounds almost excited when he says, “Ooh, oh, you gonna cum babygirl?” He sits back on his calves rather than standing on his knees and readjusts his hold on your hips, hands digging into the flesh defining your waist to your hips, and pulls you into his rough, uncoordinated thrusts, driving the entirety of his shaft into you so deep that you feel pressure pushing up in your stomach with each rocking tug. He pants out moans, watching you attentively as your face screws up while you reach your personal crescendo. 

The only time you feel this desperate for something is when you’re about to die—such a blind need, a moment stretched out that you will to continue until you are satiated, and oh does Joel deliver. 

“Go on babygirl, go on n’ cum for me, cum around my cock, be a good girl an’ show me you’re mine, I wanna make you cum, baby cum for me, cum for me,” 

His pleading encouragement is more than enough to pierce the balloon swelling in your stomach, already being bumped rapturously by his manhood. One of your hands is thrown back, grasping at the sheets, the other remaining around his wrist. Your eyes roll back in your head, you suck in a breath and there is a moment of silence, save for the creaking bed, before you break it with a ridiculous, long moan, perceiving only the bursts of ecstasy from Joel’s messy pace, which he quickens with breathy moans. Your contractions around him are dramatic, essentially sucking his dick inside of you like instinct. He pulls you against him and is mostly still besides his hips, which rapidly lurch, drawing out your orgasm to overlap with his. He falls silent again, mouth open and his brow furrowed, eyes also nearly rolled back in his head, as he mechanically glides short in and outs, nearly all of him buried inside of you, pulling back an inch at a time at most as he uses your trembling, sheathlike pussy to stroke out his cum. Then, as his hips jerk forward, leaning into you, and then jerk in again, moans squeeze out of his throat, and he finishes pressed into you. 

Panting, you stay pressed and gaze at each other, more or less astonished. 

“God damn.” Joel is the first to comment.

You laugh, out of breath, feeling him ooze inside of you. “We really get to do that every night.”

“My god I’m in heaven.” He half jokes with a smile, then relaxes your position with a huff, letting his softening length fall out and rest over you. Joel runs his hands up and down your body in two broad strokes, looking you over, then smirks and chuckles breathily. Then he slaps your thighs and simply offers, “Shower?” and laughs as your face lights up.

“Fuck I almost forgot about that!” You grin with wide, excited eyes, and follow him off the bed, squeezing your legs together a little, still filled with his cum, as you walk to the bathroom attached to Joel’s room. You admire the back of him as he turns the squeaky knobs. You can count on one hand how many times you’ve gotten this kind of full view of him; as many times as you’ve been naked with each other, it’s almost always had to have been somewhat ducked and rushed. His back is casually muscular and he has ever so slight love handles. A knee bent outwards shows off a round ass. 

Hearing the water start to spray, you can’t help a giggle, eager, and he twists to you with a smirking grin and laughs. 

“Oh man,” he chuckles as he turns his back, meticulously adjusting the temperature, then twists his head again, looking at you expectantly, “Well come on, then,” and you patter over. He gently takes your hand to lead you into the square stall, and moves behind you to slide the glass door shut. 

There is no need for him to walk you through the process of taking a shower, but he slowly guides you under the spray anyway, and you gasp as it hits you, still heating up, not used to the sensation. You hadn't realized that it’s been so long that you’ve forgotten how a shower feels and it disturbs you slightly, feeling a little feral versus Joel’s domesticated cleanliness, but his light, absent minded smile eases the thoughts out as he walks in a few slow steps, backing you up to join you under the showerhead’s broad spray. He leans his head back, closes his eyes under the water, and lets go of you to smooth his hair back as the water soaks it. When he opens his eyes again, he smiles at you and smoothes his hands over your wet face. 

“Turn around,” he nods, and you do. He stops touching you, leaving you unnerved for only a moment until his hands come back over your upper back, cool soap gliding them over your skin. He squeezes your shoulders lightly and it makes you sigh, then slides his hands over your shoulders, up and down each arm individually, adding more slight, relaxing pressure, and then his hands follow the personal downward design of your body as he shifts his body against your back. Stubble tickles your neck and you giggle as he nudges in to place innocent kisses over your neck while he washes your chest, then slipping soapy hands down your sides to your waist, hips, and what he can reach of your thighs. Humming out a deep sigh, you feel dazed and limp under the hot, deeply relaxing water. Joel embraces you from behind, just resting his face in your neck, standing still with his arms around you. 

Suddenly, you’re hit with the urge to cry. This is the safest you’ve felt in a long, long time. Not only are you in Jackson, a secure compound where you can go see a friend for a drink and take a hot shower with the promise of fresh clothes, but your love is finally with you, solid and warm, holding you with strong arms and gentle lips. You can’t hold it back, and when Joel feels it he removes himself and turns you around. “What’s wrong babygirl?” concern contorts his face. 

Smiling as much as your crying allows, you answer, “Nothing.” 

Understanding, Joel pouts his lips in an emotional smile and pulls you back in, hooking his arms under yours to support your weight, and your arms follow up around his neck. “I know.” You let it go and weep quietly against him. “It’s alright baby. I got’chou. You’re alright, darlin’.” He reassures you. After a couple minutes, you calm, suddenly very tired, barely opening your eyes when Joel pulls away. “Oh, baby,” he chuckles, “don’t go to sleep in the shower. Lemme finish you up real quick, then you can go to bed n’ I’ll get you some new clothes from Maria.”

“No,” you murmur, “don’t leave me.”

“Alright, alright,” he pulls you back in, “I’ll stay with you. I’ll never leave you.” He sighs serenely into the crook of your neck. “You can just borrow some’m my clothes, n’ I’ll talk to Maria in the mornin’. Okay?” You nod. “Alright, baby,” he readjusts his embrace around you, “let’s just get into bed, we can give you a proper shower later. Plenty a time. You can take a shower every day if you want, a hot shower every day. An’ I’ll stay with you every night. Jus’ like like this.” Joel’s hands rub up and down your body, “Warm like this. Every day will be warm jus’ like this now, my love.”

[diorsluv]

feather , the drama queen

“ i say she’s too dramatic ”

series m. list

( socialmedia!au )

yourusername

liked by lhughes_06, missseraphina and 310,937 others

yourusername photo dump time 🗣️🗣️

guess who ran into connor bedard at the family function 😱 he was looking at me weird n shit cuz me and mark were cosplaying as rapunzel and flynn rider

also i love taking screenshots of my bf and his goofy brothers when they look stupid!

tagged: lhughes_06, markestapa, _quinnhughes, trevorzegras, jamie.drysdale, masonmctavish23, _connorbedard

view all comments

jamie.drysdale where did you find that pic of us.

→ yourusername use ur common sense

→ trevorzegras this feels like a violation

→ yourusername it is! ☺️

_connorbedard i was looking at you weird because you are weird.

→ yourusername awww cmon ur no fun 😔 we all know im ur favorite relative

→ _connorbedard we’re not related.

→ jamie.drysdale oh my god not even your cousin loves you yourusername

→ yourusername SHUT UP JAMIE

→ _connorbedard WE’RE. NOT. COUSINS?????

→ trevorzegras breaking news!!! bedsy and jamie are related 😱😱

→ _connorbedard my finger is hovering over the block button

username44 funny that she posts this RIGHT NOW..

→ username10 they all have her blocked they don’t know anything

trevorzegras WHEN THERES SOMETHING STRANGE

→ yourusername IN THE NEIGHBORHOOD

→ _quinnhughes aw that sounds just like the two of you

→ luca.fantilli WHO YOU GONNA CALL

→ rutgermcgroarty GHOSTBUSTERS!

→ adamfantilli 👻👻👻

→ yourusername quinn YOU’RE the strange looking thing in the neighborhood 🤬 _quinnhughes

→ jackhughes flashbacks to when that little kid got scared when he opened the door

→ _quinnhughes oh my god I WAS WEARING A COSTUME

username79 did anyone else notice who liked the post…

→ username3 good lord she’s back

luca.fantilli it seems war is NOT over 😔

→ yourusername ????

→ dylanduke25 luca i thought you had her blocked smh

→ luca.fantilli how’d you know who i was talking about unless you didn’t have her blocked either???

→ yourusername …

_quinnhughes everyone’s gonna start calling me depressed now 😐

→ yourusername sweetie they’ve been calling you depressed keep up

→ _quinnhughes 😨

→ jackhughes 😱

→ lhughes_06 🤯

dylanduke25 let’s give me the credit for that costume idea!

→ yourusername you told me to dress up as mother gothel.

→ dylanduke25 out of love 🤗

→ markestapa YOU TOLD ME TO DRESS LIKE THE FUCKING HORSE.

→ lhughes_06 HEY MAXIMUS IS A GREAT CHARACTER

edwards.73 why is mark at the family function 🤨

→ yourusername his mama wanted to come 😈

→ markestapa that’s a lie she forced me to come because i was the only one willing to dress up as flynn rider for her

→ edwards.73 …why are you dressing up in costumes at the family function?????

→ yourusername THE KIDS ALWAYS DO A LITTLE COSTUME PLAY CONTEST THING

→ jamie.drysdale she made me dress up as the lorax when we were in middle school

→ yourusername stop complaining i was literally mr o’hare

→ jamie.drysdale AND THEN YOU MADE ME LORD FARQUAD THE YEAR AFTER THAT

→ yourusername 🙄🙄

→ trevorzegras pics or it didn’t happen.

lhughes_06 you really snuck that cute ass pic of you thinking we wouldn’t notice

→ yourusername ew i hate you

→ lhughes_06 you love me

→ yourusername 🙄

→ lhughes_06 say it ☹️

→ yourusername 🥱

→ jackhughes PLEASE JUST SAY IT ALREADY I CANT STAND HIS WHINING

→ yourusername no can do jacky boy 😓

→ lhughes_06 you little shit

→ yourusername luv u too 😒😒

username10 connor looks so done

username98 quinn has never had a good pic of himself posted by any of his friends 💀

mackie.samo I COULDVE BEEN FLYNN RIDER WHY DIDNT U ASK ME

→ yourusername i asked mark first 😓

→ markestapa HAH take that

colecaufield i took that second photo 😒

→ yourusername our lovely backup photographer 🫶🫶

→ lhughes_06 your quality is kinda ass

→ colecaufield BRO i took it on your phone???

missseraphina

liked by yourusername and 202 others

missseraphina i know you miss me, bc why else would you have texted me last night? 🥰

view all comments

username24 oh babe.. that’s not…..

username8 girly this is a bit obsessive don’t you think? 😭

username61 he’s taken. TAKEN.

username82 yesss girl get your man back!!

→ username40 …as in the one that’s in a relationship rn??

username77 sweetie just find someone else already

username95 I THOUGHT THEY ALL BLOCKED HER but lil drizz just liked the post what

→ yourusername it gave me a good laugh what can i say

username43 they’re making an absolute mockery out of her

username20 LMFAOOO

username18 don’t tell me she’s still going on with ts 😭😭

username55 but let’s think about it.. she wouldn’t have posted this unless he actually texted her

username39 it’s bc he still wants u 😝😝

→ username14 i KNOW you’re not talking about luke hughes 💀

yourusername

liked by adamfantilli, jamie.drysdale, dylanduke25, and 347,252 others

yourusername oh girl you’re obsessed 🥱

view all comments

username90 HELL YEAH we’re back on the drama train

jamie.drysdale i thought i told you to block her 😑

→ yourusername I DID but then all my friends were telling me abt the shit she was posting and i couldn’t resist 😞😞

mackie.samo you’re so petty

→ yourusername aw cmon mack you know you love my pettiness 🤗🤗

→ mackie.samo uh huh i definitely do

→ markestapa bro ur literally pettier than she is

→ mackie.samo give me ONE good example

→ markestapa you blocked me for a week because i said your hair looks like a rat lives in it 😐

→ mackie.samo thanks for the reminder im blocking you again

username10 babe ur feeding into the drama 😭

→ yourusername i know 😈

username34 WHEN SHE PLAYS MULTIPLE INSTRUMENTSSSSS

username28 our multi-talented queen!!

adamfantilli will we ever be done with the couple-y shit 😒

→ yourusername when she’s done obsessing over my man 🫶

→ lhughes_06 what’s that heart for yourusername

→ edwards.73 you’re so possesive luke get over yourself 🙄🙄

→ adamfantilli FR

→ markestapa FR

→ luca.fantilli FR

→ jackhughes FR

→ rutgermcgroarty FR

→ _alexturcotte FR

→ _quinnhughes FR

→ trevorzegras FR

→ dylanduke25 FR

→ jamie.drysdale FR

→ colecaufield FR

→ mackie.samo FR

→ yourusername not again 😭

username88 is she ever gonna go away

luca.fantilli but when you think about it.. luke probably DID text her to provoke that post

→ yourusername LMFAO he would neverrrrr right? lhughes_06

→ lhughes_06 um

→ lhughes_06 i don’t wanna lie to you

→ yourusername oh

→ luca.fantilli oh shit 🤯

→ jamie.drysdale what.

→ markestapa DUDE I THOUGHT YOU BLOCKED HER lhughes_06

→ edwards.73 there’s no fucking way

→ _quinnhughes …

username20 goddamn what happened under luca’s comment 😭😭

username24 holy shit there’s no way luke actually texted her again

username80 oh my god???

notes ) cliffhanger 🙊🙊 yes we’re back but not really (?) this one’s been sitting in the drafts for a while so.. i hope it’s fairly adequate LMAOO

tags: @aliaology @hockeyboysarehot @absolutelyhugh3s @jackquinnswife @freds-slut @love4ldr @blueeyedbesson @43hughes @v1olentdelights @dancerbailey3 @random-human02 @ho3forfakeguys @loveforaugust @cstads-blog @h0e4fictionalme-n @bunting58

[demonpiratehuntress]

hiii! it’s the autistic anon,, i hope it’s okay if i try requesting smth a little easier to write? i was thinking maybe smth like Law and reader aren’t dating yet, maybe reader joined the crew not too long ago and so is still quiet and shy around everyone. but one day Law notices her reading a comic book he likes and strikes up a conversation about it and maybe that leads to him finding out they’re really similar in some ways? like both have a coin and comic book collection, both love tattoos, and reader even wanted to be a nurse but just didn’t have the resources for it. Law kind of develops a crush from there and u can decide how he handles it and whether or not he even realizes he has a crush at first. and i don’t mind what format either, it can be headcanons or a fic or anything! and i just want to say thank u for taking time out of your busy schedule to write for us, i love your writing and look forward to your posts everyday! i hope your day is great!! <3

hello again! of course, i'm open to a lot of other ideas :) this sounds so cute and sweet, i can definitely write this! thank you for requesting again :D i chose headcanons because they're more fun to write lol. I hope you like it!

taglist - @kabloswrld

two peas in a pod

Trafalgar Law x F!Reader

summary - the cute scenario described in the ask :)))

warnings - none

You'd always wanted to become a pirate, ever since you were little

So when Law and his crew showed up at your little island and stopped at your village to replenish their supplies - and apparently take down bandits that were terrorising you - you took the opportunity

At first Law was sceptical, wondering what you brought to his crew, but after your first venture with them he realised you could be useful, not only as a fighter but also another medic, one with more nurturing qualities and a softer touch

He would never admit it, but he was jealous of how the crew immediately went to you for help now

But after a while Law himself warmed up to you as well, and found himself seeking your company more and more often

He knew very well he could fix himself up, but chose to come to you instead just to have an excuse to talk to you and maybe learn more about you

Despite interacting with the crew for medicinal purposes, you were still shy and reserved, only speaking when you needed to

You were surprised when Law walked into your room one day, claiming that he needed your help determining what kind of sickness he was developing (he was not sick)

He caught you in your free time, so you were reading a favourite comic of yours, a secret you had managed to keep from everyone for so long - until now

"What's that?"

"Hmm? Oh, this? Nothing.."

You hid the comic behind your back, hoping Law would drop it and just focus on his non-existent sickness, but luck was not on your side today

His brows furrowed in concentration, before his eyes lit up in a way you'd never seen before

"I know that comic!"

"Wh-what? No you don't..."

"Surely you're not telling me I wouldn't recognise the cover of my favourite comic book, (Name)-ya..."

"O-of course not! I just didn't think..."

You trailed off as Law took a seat directly next to you, plucking the comic from your hands

He begins to flick through the pages with you sitting so stiff and awkwardly beside him

Eventually you relax and attempt to initiate a discussion about it with him

Which turns into a full debate over your favourite characters

You've never had this much fun talking about something before

And your captain seems so much more relaxed and at ease, and he's even SMILING as he talks

The conversation slowly goes from the comic to other shared interests between the two of you, such as his coin collection - he was visibly stunned to find out you had one too - and your desire to become a nurse, something medical-related

Law was surprised to hear that you wanted to be a nurse

Not because you didn't have the skills for it, you definitely did, but because you had chosen to become a pirate instead

When he asked what changed your mind, something weird happened in his chest when your answer was "i didn't have the opportunity or the resources in my small village...but also...you"

He didn't know what that feeling was, but he kind of liked it?

From then on, Law took every opportunity he could to talk to you about both your coin collections, your medical knowledge and your shared interest in that comic

He wanted to know why he was feeling this way, and hoped talking to you more would help him understand

But now he was just craving your presence, craving your voice and the way you passionately spoke about your interests

It wouldn't be a good day if Law hadn't gotten the chance to see or speak to you

And it was frustrating him that he couldn't figure out why he felt this way about you, and why he treated you differently to his other crewmates

Then Shachi and Penguin teased him about being in love with you

And suddenly it made sense

But for the first time ever, Law was terrified, because he didn't know what to do, this was not his forte

So obviously, he needed help, and since Shachi and Penguin were doing nothing but teasing him, he went to Bepo

You were completely oblivious to what he and Bepo were planning, thinking they were just planning the crew's next island stop

You were also oblivious to Law's feelings - mostly because he hid it well - but were completely aware of your own feelings for him

And you tried to hide it, you really did, but everyone could see the way your eyes softened when he walked into the room or spoke to you directly, the way your cheeks reddened when he complimented you or said something nice, the way you always seemed even more shy and flustered around him

Even Law noticed

But for a long time he debated whether or not to actually go through with his Bepo's plan to ask you out

He took so long that you almost gave up on him entirely

But when he did finally approach you, it was so worth it

He had planned a very romantic dinner in his room - candlelit and everything

He was so nervous the entire time, only slightly comforted by the fact that you looked nervous as well

"You look nice"

"Oh, um, thanks. So do you"

It is SO awkward for a few minutes, as you both just look at each other or the food

You decide to break the silence since it seems like Law never will

"If this is too uncomfortable, I can-"

"No!" He jumps to say, then clears his throat. "I mean, I'd like you to stay. I'm sorry, I'm not very good at this."

So you stay, and you're patient with him as he works up the nerve to tell you how he feels

In the end, you tell him you feel the same way, and like a movie, you close the date with a sweet, slow kiss - both yours and Law's pace

[cosmicstarlatte]

Beel A-Z Smut HCs (Obey Me!)

⬅Back to Smut HC A-Z Masterlist ◇

18+ only, minors do not interact.

My personal headcanons using this [prompt list]

The goal is to finish the whole list; you are welcome to request a letter so I get to it faster. I will work on it as quick as I can but keep in mind I do have a life & responsibilities lol. ^^

Last Updated: Oct.1.2023 (6 out of 26)

⚠️Notes: I'll tag any sections if needed. If you think a section needs a tag, kindly let me know.

A: Affair (Describe an extra-marital affair)

B: Birthday (Describe birthday sex)

C: Compliments (Mid- and post-sex compliments)

D: Dry Humping (Describe a dry-humping scene)

You only went into the kitchen for a snack & you somehow ended up pushed against the counter with Beel dry humping your ass. Still, the gentle(?) giant wouldn't let go of the devil croissant in his mouth & managed to swallow it with another bite. "Mmph. Sorry. C-couldn't resist." You moaned as you felt his cock twitch against you, desperately wanting more. His arms were wrapped easily around your waist. "C-can I?" He asks as he continues grinding & a hand slipped to reach for your waistband. "Beel what if someone walks in!" You whined yet still pushing up against him. He swiftly pulled your bottoms down, "...it'll be really quick."

E: Experimenting (Trying something new)

F: Firsts (First time having sex together)

G: Gentle (Describe gentle/loving mid-sex gestures)

H: Handsy (When they can’t keep their hands to themselves)

I: Initiator (Who initiates most of the time? How?)

J: Jealous (“Claiming” a partner)

K: Kitchen (Describe a sex scene in the kitchen)

L: Likes (What they like in the bedroom)

M: Morning (Describe morning sex)

N: Never (Things they would never try)

O: Orgasm (Describe coming--who comes first? What do they say? How does the other person know it’s approaching?)

You're always going to cum first about 90% of the time. The only exception really being if you decide to just give him a blowjob. Anyway Beel's a giver, he loves to eat, we know this already! He could stay eating you out for hoursss. He's the type to say thank you & ask for more when you cum on his tongue. He tells you how delicious you taste.❤️ Now if he's cumming, you know by the sudden gasp and low groan he always does, always pushing himself as deep as he can go & you always eagerly await the big load this giant gives you. :3

P: Playlist (A playlist for getting down and dirty; will probably include a lap dance song, a song for making love, and a song that represents their sex life)

Q: Quiet (Reaction to a quiet partner)

He doesn't really feel one way or another about it, he's just a big teddy bear that loves to make love with you.🙂 Of course the few sounds you do make when he stuffs his massive cock in you does turn him on, he prefers to see the pretty sexy faces you make as he fucks you senseless. ^^

R: Ruttish (Signs that they’re horny)

Beel has his moments & he can be blunt. If you're dating, he'll tell you & ask, respectfully, if you want to fuck lol. If you're not together quite yet... well, he's going to be a little clingy & you'll notice him smelling you a lot more often like some tasty snack he can't wait to have. He'll have a flushed face & somehow eat more than he already does until something is finally done about it.

S: Safe Word (How often is the safe word used? Why?)

T: Teasing (Who’s the tease in the relationship? What do they do? How often?)

U: Undressing (Strip teasing a partner)

V: Videos (Sending NSFW videos to each other)

W: Wedding Night (Consummating the marriage)

X: XXX (What kind of porn does the person watch? How often?)

He's not too picky & usually finds whatever is on the first page or two of a porn site. Sometimes he will look at food porn but tbh it's a lot more distracting & he always ends up feeling hungry after it. He doesn't really watch it that often & prefers to imagine his own little scenarios in his head.

Y: Yawn (How they sleep post-sex)

Z: Zoo (Their animalistic qualities in the bedroom)

tags: biting, breeding He's a biter, he loves to mark you in so many ways. Some are soft bites & others are harder love bites. He loves to leave his scent on you!!! Also sorry if he does get just a little rough, he can't help it when you look so small, all he wants to do is breed you. He loves doggy & the mating press, please let him go wild with you ♡

[onyourowndaisymae]

hi!!!!!! can i request the minecraft post u did for the dateables but for the brothers? i love ur writing sm it's so cute <3333

obey me brothers playing minecraft with you

thank you so much for the love <33 this was actually a lot of fun to write because all of these men are so very ridiculous. cheers to my first ever request!

[dateables version]

content warnings: language, bullying the villagers, killing the animals, you know how minecraft is

prompt: you've somehow convinced these guys to play minecraft, a human world game, one night, just the two of you. but how exactly does that experience go?

{established relationship, obey me x reader with the brothers}

Lucifer

oh. oh peepaw.

you really have to coax this man into playing with you. he's perfect at everything, all the time-- to engage in activity like this one, in front of you of all people, wounds his ego more than he'd like to admit. he doesn't want you to see him be bad at something. what if you no longer respect him? what if his inability to comprehend the little block people's actions are enough to ruin your love for him? he's genuinely distressed about this (not that he'd let it show), but you seem interested, so he reluctantly agrees.

two key things are necessary when playing minecraft with lucifer: patience and teamwork.

leaving him to do any task alone is daunting. the perfectionism paralyzes him a bit in these moments. take him with you! collect wood together, mine in the same mineshaft, hunt monsters together-- all of it starts to ease his mind when you work together. he starts to focus not on his pride but his love for you and spending quality time by your side.

as time progresses, he does eventually get a grip in the controls and mechanics-- well, as much as you can expect a dinosaur like him to understand. you still do a lot of tasks together in-game, but it's more of camaraderie thing by that point. he just likes being by your side, okay? don't make him say it, or you'll be hunting monsters by yourself bestie.

lucifer is also a really big fan of the soundtrack. it's so simple yet well-composed, a stark different to that garish video game music levi listens to. please play with the sound up and let him enjoy the sound of the rain intermingling with the music; his relaxed face is very cute.

Mammon

what's that? you wanna play minecraft with the great mammon? of course you do! he's gonna be the best player you've ever seen, just ya wait-- what's that? no, he's never touched the game before, but he knows he'll be fantastic. watch and learn, baybee, cuz the great mammon is here to show up and show out.

what he lacks in skill, he makes up several times over in enthusiasm. this is important, because he absolutely lacks skill.

mammon is a dangerous combination of unobservant and overenthusiastic, leading to every stupid situation you can think of. he thinks he sees an important resource, so he leaves for juuust a second... boom. he's lost. he somehow manages to attract lava in every. single. cave. at this point, you have to ban him from carrying anything important.

one thing he is good at is monster hunting. he's made it his mission from day 1 to protect you, whether it be real life or in a video game. he'll face a monster-- enderman, creeper, sneaky skeleton, you name it-- without an ounce of fear if it means you'll live another in-game day (some might call this excessive, but you just call it cute).

like everything with mammon, sometimes his instinct to protect you goes overboard. he tries to ban you from entering the mines and going outside at night because what if a monster gets you, human?? fortunately for you, he never figured out how to run in-game, so just sprint past him and carry on.

on a completely unrelated note-- this greedy motherfucker (said with SO much affection) hordes all the treasures in-game like a dragon. his goal is to build you two a mansion of diamond and gold. this is very cute if you once again ignore the fact that he keeps FALLLING IN LAVA with all his vauables. y'all are never getting anywhere in this game.

Leviathan

levi is, hands down, the best person to play minecraft with. you don't have to teach him a thing-- in fact, he's probably the one that brought it up to you!

he's very pleased that you'd indulge in one of his hobbies like this, regardless of whether you actually play video games or not. just the thought of you there, sitting next to him, hanging out with him because you want to be around a shut-in otaku like him... the thought gives him butterflies.

... y'all can't actually share a house by the way. he gets too flustered. make a joke about putting your minecraft beds together and he's blushing. it does not matter how long you've been together, his reaction will always be the same.

he's one of the only ones that you can progress through the game with. bashful levi is amazing in the mines. he's got a system down pat that'll help you guys find your way back to the entry point, where he's set up a base camp with chests and resources so you won't have to resurface until you're done. smart, right?

y'all actually go to the nether and the end. he's very quick to pick up the game's mechanics and use his luck to to help you guys progress. every victory is shared; what's the fun of winning if you're not winning together?

levi will play with you basically any time you ask. he loves when you refer to it as "our minecraft world". better yet, praise him for all his hard work in making your world and watch him melt. he's just a sucker for your love, and the fact that he's actually good at this activity makes him all the more happy to do it with you.

Satan

satan doesn't really know much about this game that you're describing, but he's willing to play it with you if you're really that interested. he's always ready to learn more about things from the human world; when you tell him this is one of the most popular games up on earth, he wants to try it at least once.

satan is not the best in general at video games, but he's quick-witted and resourceful, so the two of you get by just fine. the problem mostly lies in the fact that satan's audacity gets you into trouble sometimes. there is no little voice in his head telling him not to do something potentially dangerous and stupid, especially if there's some reward to gain on the other side. he is fully convinced he can take on an iron golem with a stone sword and no armor, just you watch--

be carefully with letting him run around freely. there's lots of ways to die in this game, and each failure pokes at the embers of wrath below his cool exterior.

this intelligent lil guy figures out redstone pretty damn quick. he'll use this knowledge to create lots of little creations meant to make your camp better. whether or not this actually helps is an entirely different story... but look! a gate! aren't you so proud of him? (please praise him, he needs it so bad)

and you wouldn't be playing with satan if all progress didn't come to a stop the moment he spots an ocelot. when you tell him you can befriend them, he's overjoyed. look at how cute they are! one ocelot turns into two, then three, then four... suddenly there's a small army of ocelots in your house that he's caring for. y'all better make room in your joint minecraft bed or satan will feel like a bad cat dad. he's so ridiculous and i love him

Asmodeus

this man plays minecraft with his priorities straight-- he spends way too long creating a cute character skin to play with, then builds a cute house and decorates it to the nines, then focuses on finding himself the cutest armor and weapons... all before doing literally anything productive, btw.

do not expect asmodeus to be much help. he's mostly there for moral support. he cannot do things "for survival" like gathering food and resources or building a starter home. everything must be perfect, or it doesn't get done. asmo did not craft himself a bed until he was able to dye the wool pink and have a cute pink bed. he cannot bring himself to live in an ugly house, so you either need to help him or listen to him whine about getting rained on or attacked by monsters until he's done.

this is not to imply that playing with asmo is not fun!!

asmo is not a monster hunter, a miner, or any good at gathering resources. however, his experience with makeup makes him insanely creative. while you might not have a house for several days, the end result even gives barbatos' house a run for its money. his decor is always very cute and clean, soft even in the blocky 2D world. he'll make your whole base camp aesthetically pleasing if you let him (please let him-- his smile is worth it).

asmo often finds himself a damsel in distress. he'll fall in holes and get very confused, scream when he gets attacked, and generally need you to protect him at every turn. succeed, though, and he'll hail you as one of the most amazing people he's ever met. the game will be discarded as he throws his arms around you, kissing you all over the face and showering you in praises, all for saving his house from a stray creeper.

oh, and he'll definitely put your beds next to each other and smirk at you. what did you expect from the avatar of lust? cornball

Beelzebub

sweet, beloved baby beel. he's ready and willing to play with you whenever. if you want to make some actual progress, prepare lots of snacks and set a cozy atmosphere to keep him full and content. playing with the avatar of gluttony does require a little prep in that regard.

this (metaphorical) angel really has a hard time killing any of the livestock. he apologizes aloud anytime he has to slay one and explains to the poor creature why he's killing them. sorry, little sheep guy, but you two need to make beds. the cows make him feel especially bad because they remind him of belphie.

he's really big on making sure you guys have a secure, safe home to hide away in. sometimes, things get really overwhelming in the game, so he wants you to have a space where you feel safe and protected enough to calm down. this bunker is definitely a bit ugly, but we can't win them all.

play with him long enough and all the food will start looking really tasty to him. that bread looks a little too real, doesn't it, mc? and that cake is so life-like... redirect him to his snack horde, stat.

he also wants to do all of your tasks together. when he's there with you, he can make sure you're safe or offer you help when your struggling to complete a task on your own. he want to make sure you're having fun! let him help you, please, it makes him feel loved. he likes spending time with you.

definitely doesn't get the "putting your minecraft beds together" joke. you can either explain the to him and watch him blush, or let him live with the assumption that it's for extra cuddle room.

Belphegor

you've got to coax belphie into playing with you for a few days, because honestly? that sounds like a lot of work. not only does he have to participate, but he's also got to learn, too? he's already yawning just talking about it all.

he'll eventually snuggle in with his back against your chest and your arms clumsily holding the controller in front of him. he doesn't particularly care that this position makes gaming difficult for you, not when you're cuddling him like this. it's really a win-win situation in his eyes: he'll play the little block game if you shower him in unconditional affection any time he wants. what a deal! his youngest child energy really shows in times like these.

belphie is heartless when it comes to raiding villages and collecting resources. what's that? you feel bad? they're not real, mc. they don't have feelings. they don't care that you're stealing from them. if it really makes you feel bad he'll stop, but he will complain about how much easier things could have been if you'd just robbed a village or two.

somehow, some way, he's also super lucky?? he'll stumble upon rare resources with little to no effort and snicker about how you're still scrambling for supplies. don't worry, he'll share. only if you beg, though. go on. he wants to hear it. maybe, maybe he'll be willing to give you the diamonds he found if you convince him. (what a fucking menace!)

he will, eventually, fall asleep while playing. the music is too soft and your arms around him are too warm for him to not drift off. that's okay. carefully take the controller away from him, save the game, shut down the system, and settle in for the night. he'll cuddle closer in his sleep, unconsciously touched by the gesture, and drag you into dreamland with him.

[werewolf-girlfriend]

ive been enabled so let me share some of my thoughts on how to get ur art noticed online

if u want Engagement on ur posts then i believe that its critical to make people care about ur art. the easiest way to do this is to appeal to something they already care about, like fandom, aesthetics/subculture, current events, having fun (people love humor!). a harder but perhaps more fulfilling route is to talk about ur own ocs and projects enough until people start caring about them too

theres an infinite amount of topics people care about out there so id suggest picking something u already care about urself and channel ur art energy there. trying to make art for the most popular things out there regardless own interests is an exercise in misery, id advise against it..! if im allowed to get superstitious for a moment, i do believe that even untrained eyes can tell whether a piece of art was fun to work on or a chore. and besides! if ur having fun then its easier to create more, and the more u create the more chances ull have at getting lucky and having a post seen :)

on a very related note, art is a way to communicate ideas so the quality of the idea being presented in a piece of art is paramount to how popular a post will be. what i mean by this is that technical skill isnt the primary determinant of a posts popularity. if all your posts are portraits of original characters then people will have a hard time connecting with your posts and theyll keep scrolling, even if those portraits are masterpieces! the major exception to this is probably other artists, who ive found usually have a greater appreciation for the technical side of art (we can only speculate as to why..!)

lemme finish by saying that making popular posts and being good at art are two entirely different skillsets, ive seen many incredibly skilled artists with jack shit for notes because they dont give people a reason to care about their stuff NOT TO MENTION its a huge game of luck whether a post will get seen. so dont go insane in pursuit of recognition!

(i dont want to make this post too long so ive included examples from my own art and their note counts with my analysis after the break)

hello and welcome to the extracurricular segment to this post :) i bring yall two pieces from my art blog @werewolf-artfriend:

here we have a portrait of my fursona that im still proud of and a sketch suggesting "what if sniffers (from minecraft) were the size of mountains?" (let it be noted that the sniffer sketch was posted right during the minecraft mob vote = peak interest in the subject of sniffers).

the portrait at the time of writing has a crisp 30 notes, whilst the sniffer sketch has over 2000 notes. from the same artist, on the same blog, posted only a few months apart. i believe this is a good example both of the power of a piece of art having an interesting idea at its core AND of a piece appealing to the interests of the masses

this is of course just two convenient example posts, but i have experienced fan art of popular topics getting thousands of notes a couple of times now, amidst my other furry shit that these days get around 200-300 notes in comparison

this may sound like a really long winded way of saying "fan art make the world go round" but i just want to point out the nuances that

1) it matters what u make fan art of: if a fandom is small or dormant (waiting on new canon content for example) then clearly less people will be excited about the fan art you make. dont expect 10k notes on ur post if the average recent post in the fandom gets around 200 etc etc

2) it doesnt have to be fan art! ive also had some of my bird art get thousands of notes because people simply like birds :) and this applies to ANY topic people care about! the world rly is your oyster on this one

anyway i think ive started rambling dhgdjhgd thanks if u read this far! i hope i got my point across! and if ur feeling down about ur art not being seen then just keep at it okay! keep creating and keep having fun! keep sharing ur ideas and perspectives with the world and ur audience will eventually find u! i love you!

[hexedwinchester]

How come u dont love Sam protecter and older brother Dean🥹

By Sam own words Dean raised him, a-lot of the good qualities that Sam has he got from Dean. Yeah Sam childhood wasn't the best, but he was deeply loved by Dean, i believe this love helped overcome many obstacles in his life.

In fact again by Sam own words, Deans love and protection is the only thing he could always count on.

I am not saying Dean is perfect, but who is ? To say that Sam needed protection from Dean sounds odd, where Dean is literally his home and the only place he feels safe.

hi @rosedark88

Interesting question and perspective you have offered.. this would be fun to analyse 😊

Before I start, let me be honest: I'm not Dean's biggest fan because I find a lot of his actions to be problematic. Please proceed with caution: you may not like the answer but I'll break it down as logically as I can. (Please remember, this is not a hate post)

Yes, I agree Dean has been Sam's protector (but only until early seasons. I'll explain what I mean) and he did raise him but time and again Dean has confessed if not to others, then his own subconscious that he hated having to carry that burden. He has let it slip that he is bitter about having to raise Sam (which I can understand, it wasn't fair) but I've seen him pretends otherwise which is two-faced IMO. (He confesses this in S03E10 Dream A Little Dream of Me when he is facing himself, in case you are looking for a reference.)

He is also a hypocrite with repressed emotions. He says he admires his dad but deep down he too resented him but he still gave Sam shit about him because Sam was just more blunt about his opinion of John unlike Dean. Again, in the same episode he says "my dad was an obsessed bastard. All that crap about keeping Sam safe was his crap." See what I mean?

Continuing on the hypocrisy, his whole agenda of "what's dead should stay dead" is gone for a toss when he makes that deal the first time to save Sam in S2. He gave Sam a lot of shit for trusting Ruby because she's a demon (unfortunate for Sam she had bad intentions) but Dean trusted Benny, Gadreel, Crowley and Cas when all of these guys have broken his trust later. But we don't see Sam bringing that shit up like Dean tends to.

Let's also not forget that Dean berated Sam for getting Charlie killed over the Book of the Damned but apparently no one cares that his manipulation got Kevin killed too? Do you see the double standards here?

Speaking of saving Sam, every single time he has done something apocalyptic to save Sam, it was for selfish reasons. The main reason is because Dean struggles to let go, to move on. He'd rather drag a zombie Sam around than let the man die. Even you have to agree there's some truth in that.

Dean hated that Sam left for college and it wasn't because he was afraid something might get to him. No, it was because he saw that as Sam's betrayal. That Sam picked college over him.

Now, coming to your question about why Sam needs protection from Dean his apparent 'savior'? Yes, Dean is willing to do anything to "save Sam" from every evil thing out there but that's the whole problem. Why even Billie doesn't like the Winchesters because these guys are willing to risk the destruction of the whole world to save each other which isn't right.

let's look at those grave "save Sam" moments and see what's wrong with those pictures:

Sam's first death in S2: Dean bought himself one way ticket to Hell to bring Sam back because he didn't want to keep doing this without Sam (he confesses this in his monologue to Sam's corpse and also in the Croaton episode when he finds out Sam is infected and doesn't leave). Dean is literally nobody without Sam and I'm not saying this. This is who Dean is. Sam is Dean's essence for survival. So Dean saved Sam for himself putting Sam through the same ordeal that John put Dean through. Dean passes on his trauma to Sam like a hand me down.

Sam's detox: Bobby tried to knock sense into him that it's probably the cold turkey thing that's killing Sam. I know Dean was trying to help him but I doubt he knew the right way to do so. Even when he realised his method would kill Sam, he was okay letting him suffer like that until he died (because then at least he dies human). I'm sorry that's not how you deal with someone with addiction problem. Despite everything, Sam is still willing to work with Dean but he can't get over Sam choosing Ruby and calls Sam a monster.

In season 6, the brothers realise something is off about Sam. At the end of the episode 'You Can't Handle the Truth' Sam comes clean that he felt different since he was brought back and he needs help to figure it out and how does Dean help him? By beating him unconscious, tying him to the chair like he is a monster? The way he talks to Sam in that scene: "you better hope he (Cas) can diagnose you. he asks, you answer and then you shut your cakehole". So Sam isn't allowed to talk about his own body? Oh wait I know, he's not, not when Dean said so.

In Season 8, he impersonates Amelia, sending Sam SOS just so he can he rendevous with Benny? Amelia was a shore in his Sam's storm. He loved her and deeply cared for her. To let him think something happened to her was cruel. Especially given how Sam's past relationships ended up his beloveds dying horrifically. Who plays such sick mind games? And to your own brother??!

Season 9, my favourite, the one that completely dissolved the rose tinted glasses that the show created for Dean: Manipulating Sam into saying yes to be possessed by an angel (an angel you know nothing of) knowing Sam's history of possession, that was just sick. Sam wanted to die. He was ready. If Dean wanted to save him, the least he could do was be honest about it. Not manipulate him into saying yes. But he didn't. He resorted to manipulation because he knew Sam would rather die than be possessed. Something that people fail to understand here is 'the idea of possession' is a hard limit for Sam. But Dean has no regard for it because in his head "he did what he had to and he won't even apologize for that". I'm sorry, that's the biggest red flag to me. I don't care if you have raised me, protected me and kept me safe only for you to stab me where I'm the most vulnerable. You are no different than all those evil things out to hurt me. That's why I love Sam for standing his ground and not forgiving Dean for this. He was right to say he didn't want to be brothers. If my siblings betrayed me like that, I'd leave too.

And whenn in Season 9 finale, Dean wanted to go off to kill metatron on his own, Sam wanted to tag along but what's dean's response? Punch him into unconsciousness and leave him on the street like that? All vulnerable for any monster to attack him? Really?! How is this protecting? Ya maybe metatron won't kill him but something else still might!

Oh and in Season 15, Dean pulled a gun on Sam and mind you he under no dark influence. This was all him. I'm not even going to elaborate further on this.

I can list at least 10 occasions where Dean has hit, punched, beat up Sam but Sam hasn't fought back. And that's not even what bothers me the most. It's the fact that Sam doesn't look surprised (meaning Dean beaten him before and I so believe he has and it's a frequent, almost business as usual like) or he looks scared (I'll try to find that gif where Sam is on the ground putting his hands before his face to protect himself against Dean). Dean is abusive when he is angry.

Something you said in the ask that struck me odd. What qualities did Sam learn from Dean? Let's see some of Sam's core good qualities:

Emotional intelligence

Forgiving

Compassionate

Empathetic

Selflessness

Determination

Self awareness

Open mindedness

Authencity

Dean is not known for any of the above qualities, so I disagree he learnt his good qualities from Dean. Dean has an emotional intelligence of a wooden plank. He holds grudges and isn't nearly as forgiving as Sam is. Compassion and empathy are not Dean's qualities either. Dean is selfish. His first thought is how to use someone to his advantage. He did that with Cas, Crowley, even Jack. I've seen Dean give up more often. His "I can't keep doing this", "why is it our job to save everyone", "who says I want to do this?" are all indicators of this. Self-awareness tends to dwell in his blindspot. I've said this before, Dean is black and white, Sam is grey area meaning Sam is more open minded than Dean. My favourite: nothing about Dean is original. His leather jacket? John's. His car? John's. His music? John's. His life motto? Also John's. Whereas Sam has been authentic, true to himself than Dean ever could. Did Sam learn hunting from Dean? Yes. Loyalty? Yes. But neither of these are Sam's core qualities. So I disagree that Sam's good qualities come from Dean. If anything, his good qualities are actually him trying not to be like Dean.

Sam can count on Dean's love and protection because he has been conditioned to since he was 6 months old. First by his father and then by Dean himself either through emotional abuse (he keeps reminding him about how his decisions always end up with someone dying or gaslighting him into guilt tripping on things outside his control) or downright physical beatings. The Winchesters have dysfunctional family and relationships. Again, remember Sam is the forgiving one in this relationship. In fact Sam is forgiving to a fault and that's what this is. It doesn't make Dean's actions right just because Sam has been forgiving them.

To summarise, here why I feel Sam needs protection from Dean:

Dean saves Sam only because he doesn't know how to live without him. That's not normal. He has done crazy shit to "save him" resulting in causing Sam more trauma

He quickly lashes out (often resulting in verbal or physical violence) because of his repressed emotions and poor anger management

He has verbally and physically hurt Sam either by calling him a monster or saying he doesn't trust him or by beating him unconscious on multiple occasions

he is controlling, bossy and threatening. "If didn't know you, I'd want to hunt you." Sorry, if I were Sam, I wouldn't feel very safe

Dean doesn't see the wrong in his action or worse, even when he knows he is wrong, he is too stubborn to apologise for that. Everything is shoved under "I did what I had to" or "I'm not apologizing for saving you".

Dean has manipulated Sam and gaslit him

His whole "this is a dictatorship" comes across as a red flag which takes me to my next point:

He never treated Sam as his equal. Don't see how that counts as love

Dean was mad at Sam in DSOTM because Sam's happy memories (that Sam wasn't in control of and the whole situation was probably rigged. I mean, Zachariah cosied up with Mary's image for god's sake) didn't involve Dean. The idea that Sam can have a life outside Dean has never sat well with him

He has locked Sam in the panic room on at least 3 occasions. Sam hasn't done that even once

Sorry, but Dean is not a poster boy for love and protection. When I look at a character, I not only analyse their actions but also try to understand why they acted the way they did. In Dean's case, the why has always been problematic.

Dean's intentions maybe good but his actions don't always align. His philosophy has always been "if the means justify the end" but I don't stand by it. This is what makes room for immoral, tyrant and corrupt actions and an excuse to hide you wrong doings behind those.

These are my views on why I feel Sam needed to be saved from Dean. You may or may not agree and it's fine either ways 😊

Damn! That was lengthy. But thanks for this interesting ask, it was fun! 😇

[spampai]

Posting this so I can ramble-

Sorry if I sound down at the moment; just a negative outlook, overthinking and brain inducing pain:

I shoudln’t think like this, because my content is for people to enjoy, love and be a community on, but it’s been in my head since day 1 from 4 years ago: How do people get so famous? (As in being loved by the community at a larger margin)

I feel like I’m not getting as much as before, probably because it’s either I’m still a small artist or I don’t put more quality into my arts, or idk maybe I’m not constantly posting or smth?? I have a habit of checking Tumblr after 30 mins to see the algorithm and expecting people to like it or enjoy my content but it seemed dead these days. I usually never really cared, but as for my manga I did, ‘cause I know I put lots of effort into it, but in comparison to my other posts, it’s not that enticing. Is there a reason why? Am I promoting it too much because of my own excitement, or did people skim through because they thought it was the previous post? Idk, I can’t figure it out, I just can’t.

I did thought to myself that a few numbers on the screen means a lot of people irl, and that I’m just overthinking. Yes, I KNOW I’m not as large as any artists these days, and I know they didn’t start off famous as well. So if I want to be my own celebrity in here, I gotta keep pushing. Pls tell me in the comments or reblogs on what u think. How do you feel in this situation; how do u push through it, ‘cause I need the advices at the moment.

Have the link to the manga to anyone who even cares before the next one drops, idk I’m not feelin’ it rn:

[beef-fajitas]

i just finished watching the ninjago pilot (which somehow, id never watched before??) and as i was watching it, i put down my fav parts and my reactions :3

its a pretty long post if youre on mobile so ill put everything under the cut

"its called four weapons, not for browsing. either buy something, or go peddle your insults somewhere else" KAI.

ONE OF THE SKELETON HEADS POPPING OFF ITS BODY AND THEN BITING KAIS ANKLES IM DYING

random small detail i noticed, the shop has a landline? i wonder if it still works and if so, who they would even call-

"ouaugh. so failed." master wu is kais biggest hater rn and im loving it

HELP KAI USING HIS TOOTHBRUSH TO FIGHT OF THE REST OF THE NINJA IS SO FUNNY

ummm the way cole interrupts jay trashing kai when they all finally talk? and kai sassing him back??

"wait a minute. im still black" cole 😭

wu: jay is blue, master of lightning jay: heh, thats not all im the master of. i do a little inventing, i dabble in model building, touch of cooking, a little poetry. cole: more like mouth of lightning

kai letting out like a little laugh when wu announces cole?? and then "nice to meet ya, kid. i got your back. and for the record, there aint nothing in this world im afraid of." jhisdiaugivdsahiojoi they make me soooo ibogyuvfwBIQORYBEGFHIUirgyhiiobpyfuhogiuybpty 😔👉🏳️‍🌈

jay: gasp we're saving a girl? 😳 is she hot? 😏 cole: jayy 😒 jay: i- i just wanna know w-what we're getting ourselves into… 😟 does she like blue? 🤨 kai: back. off. 😡 wu: 🧍‍♂️

cole being the front of the horse carriage theyre all pulling??? symbolic who 🤭

"do not use the weapon. for its power-" "yeah yeah yeah, its too much for us mortals. alright guys, lets chop sockey this lemonade stand"

the random skeleton. grunting? groaning? ambience 😭

"ohahahahaoh! i found something!" "ughh thats another rock, you bonehead!" "but its shaped like a donut! i wonder if it tastes like one…" random skeletons u will always b so funny to me ⭐️

OMG AT THE TIMESTAMP 17:28 JAY WHISPERS TO KAI BUT IDK IF THE SOUND QUALITY IS JUST SHIT OR WHATEVER, BUT IT DOES NOT SOUND LIKE JAYS REGULAR VA. IT LWKY SOUNDS DEMONIC

"hey before you race off again, you need to remember. we're a team." "yeah, whatever" kai honey, cole is trying his best. pls reciprocate just a little bit. :(

coles little whimper when he comes face to face samukai 😭😭

jay making sound effects as hes fighting all the skeletons <333

omg jay is the first to figure out spinjitzu aaaaa!! i always wondered abt that ngl

oh. oh thats interesting. we get a look inside jays tornado. whats interesting is that hes moving at his normal speed (maybe a tiny bit slower? not rlly noticeable tho) but all the skeletons around him are basically turtle slow/not really moving at all. but hes also holding a conversation at normal speed with the ninja outside of his tornado? and theyre not even doing spinjitzu? ugh sjhjqhyturw;qkjkhtvgiulqbor i NEED to know how that works right NEEEOOOWWWW

"i sense you do not stand a chance 😏🤨" zane that was so smooth??? and for what??? 😍

cole flexing and saying "ha, guess they dont want another serving of these babies" while the camera pans to jay and kai just. absolutely hating on him. plasma being hater bfs is SO canon 😘

"no, kai, sensei told us not to!" "then you better keep your mouth shut." kai that was so rude wtf 😟 for once its not actually jays fault my dude

kai and cole high fiving after getting out of there :3

"i told you not to use the scythe!" "he did it-" "i warned him not to, sensei-" jay and cole both stepping away from kai and pointing at him 😭

____________

IN CONCLUSION: kai is a dickhead, jay is a fuckboy, zane has weirdo rizz, and cole is perfect <3 (/hj cole is actually the mom friend)

[louroth]

Hello everyone :> 

It's been a month! it's incredible how much my life has changed- while I'm still adjusting I'm just...still walking on clouds. it feels unreal. the patreon took off and I can almost make a living wage on it which is frankly fucking insane, and the discord is so vibrant it scared me for a moment (not anymore- shooting the shit with the people there is the favorite part of my day, even if I sometimes just leave a trail of emotes lskjdhajksdhkjasd.) I couldn't have asked for a better community. YES I am crying about it. Thank you, so, so much. I am cradling your face in my hands. crying.

But as always, enough of my bleeding heart. Let's get to it!

The first two weeks after posting the update, I took a sort of quasi vacation and only wrote a handful of story-words each day, and spent some time fooling around in the discord + brushed off my smut archive to refine for Patreon. There are already 4 stories up, and a new one coming tomorrow- though I haven't decided yet whether it will be possessive/jealous L sfw short or one very nasty short where you come across a particularly insistent species of vines while trekking the forest. hehe. we'll see. >:3

But, even though I had to rest not to combust after work, I am very pleased to say that the next chapter is coming along great, with the skeleton finished for its entirety, and about 45% and some change already written (it's very hard to gauge because I jump around a lot when I write.) This is the final chapter before the forest, filled with action and the heart wrenching drama of offering tenderness to a certain someone, and deciding for your hunter when enough is truly enough. I have teared up writing certain scenes and I genuinely cannot wait for you to experience this next part yourselves. 

It is so funny reading things I wrote for this chapter six months ago, or longer, because I knew exactly what emotions I wanted to bake in and couldn't really nail it, but now it is coming together beautifully! Sure, it will still be wonky first draft writing, but the core is there and that is all that matters for now. I'm saying soon™ for the update for now, because I am allowing myself to adapt to writing full time- I didn't quit my job to become my own nightmare boss, and I truly want to enjoy this process. I think, in the long run, it will result in a better story. Patience is my mantra. All in due time- I cannot force quality creative work. But by everything wretched and sinful, I cannot wait to share this next part with you!!! I'm frothing at the mouth!!!

In other news, y'all. I need to get organized. I get heartburn thinking about all the different variations of files and notes and notebooks and scraps of paper and variables and branches of plot and just generally, the things to keep track of is getting to the point of a dragon hoard of scary 'oh no I forgot about that part'. I'm gritting my teeth through it until this chapter is out, but after it, I am going to spend some time to

 1) get my shit together in gorgeous, beautiful spreadsheets

2) get serious about finding beta- and proofreaders. (me @ u: 🥺)

But that's it, my friends! I scrapped an entire progress report because I started sounded corporate and listing points which was just... sad. I really hope I evolve into writing these in a more fun way, which would make them more fun for you to read too! But for now, I think this will do. I hope you have a beautiful day/night, and if you would like to see more in depth dev-logs of my writing life, or random sneak peeks, I post those weekly on patreon!

Or join our discord, which. It's just the nicest place, I can't even come up with words that do it justice. It's my favorite daily newspaper.

Until next time! x

[adastrael]

Cod: mw ii characters as type of kisses (pt. 1)

Pairing(s): gender neutral reader / kyle "gaz" garrick, phillip graves, john "soap" mactavish, john price

Word count: around 2.1k

Warnings: slightly suggestive themes, other than that just fluff

A/N: this work was inspired by some posts I have seen years ago, but unfortunately couldn't find the original sources anymore :(

Kyle "Gaz" Garrick - "in the moment kiss"

Maybe you were arguing about something, or talking about another niche topic for the fifth time that day; either way, you looked way too alluring not to kiss.

"I just don't get it you know? Why would they name the fruit pineapple?"

It was just another day he spent at home with you between missions, enjoying the quality time you two could share together. As usual, you've been going off about the mentioned topic for a few minutes now, trying to prove your point to him about how it made no sense to call the fruit pineapple — naturally, you were sure your opinion was correct on the matter.

So utterly absorbed in your own thoughts, gesturing with your hands and all, you didn't realize how your boyfriend was staring at you the whole time. Gaz always looked at you like you hung the stars above, enhancing the night sky with them — you did, if he was to answer. His gaze was burning in the best way possible, filling you with warmth whenever he set his sight on you. You weren't sure if he knew the effect he had on you, but judging by his smirk sometimes, it was likely.

Within a few seconds after your question, your rambling got swiftly interrupted by a palm on your cheek, gently turning your head towards his direction. Before you could say anything about it — protest, most likely — warm lips pushed onto yours, effectively cutting off the train of thought you were riding. You made a confused noise somewhere in the back of your throat, not having anticipated the motion, but it turned into a content sigh as you soon melted into the kiss — just like every time your mouths connected and you got lost in everything that was him.

Gaz kissed like you were a treasure to cherish, like he was afraid that if he stopped touching you, you'd never let him close again. He was passionate, eager, pressing into you like he wanted to stay in your embrace forever. Somehow, he never failed to stay considerate even during times like this; when his hands anchored you to his front, grabbing hold of your waist and neck to keep you in place, bodies so close to each other you could feel his heartbeat against your own chest.

All the same, when you only just seperated for air, he chased after your lips, craving more physical contact. Always more, more, more. It was like he was drawn to you, as if you were the siren luring him into the waters with your ethereal beauty. He never got enough of you.

When he leaned in for yet another kiss, you put a hand on his chest, only slightly applying pressure, knowing it would still get the message across about needing oxygen back in your lungs.

"What was that for?"

"You looked beautiful."

It was him initiating the kisses in the first place, yet he sounded so out of breath, like he hadn't taken a lungful in years. Even now, he looked at you like you were the most precious thing he has ever seen or held in his arms. It took your breath away too, no matter how long you've been together.

Safe to say, the topic of pineapples was long forgotten by the time he finally let go of you — although not for long.

Phillip Graves - "unbreakable kiss"

You shouldn't have been doing what you were, both of you knew. And yet, you couldn't find it in yourself to break things off, especially when he whispered so sweetly in your ear every time you gave him the chance to do so.

The corridors leading through the base were non-stop busy, Shadows and oftentimes Officials roaming them during the day. It was only expected, for a facility with such a high importance couldn't have gone unmonitored, no matter the hour. Thankfully, you had a little secret up your sleeve to avoid the passage of people, one that someone else also liked to get advantage of.

Tucked into one of the rarely visited corridors — only used for supply closets — your figure stood overshadowed by a taller, more defined body. If someone was to walk by, they would surely be shocked, seeing the easily recognizable blond locks tussled, free of the usual hair gel that kept them in place. They seemed longer now, almost like they were hidden all these time from the prying eyes of others. The knowledge that you were the only one seeing him like this made your chest ache, yearn with emotions you were too afraid to think about for too long.

No one visited these hidden, out of place corridors only during cleaning shifts, meaning you weren't afraid of anyone walking on you doing what was definitely forbidden, or the very least heavily downlooked.

You had no time to deeply think about such things like being discovered though, not when his teeth kept biting down, giving a welcomed stinging feeling to your already swollen lips.

"Can't get enough of you baby."

Graves liked to flatter, to see you fall apart under him slowly. He was a master of playing his cards right, knowing exactly how to push and where. The knowledge that you would have to get back to work after he was done with you made his blood run hot and a dangerous heat coil in his abdomen. Just thinking about the possibility of someone discovering you two, realizing what he was doing to you, making you feel was enough to drive him crazy.

"Don't tease Graves."

You really should have expected to be met with a cocky smirk, his lips curling into a mocking smile. It was only usual from him, after all.

"Why would I do that, when you give up so easily anyways."

You wanted to retort, you really did, but he cut your thoughts short with a knee between your legs and a warm palm against your throat. Not gripping or pushing, never outside of his room, just keeping it planted there. As if he was commanding "Still". Who were you to resist?

Sometimes you hated yourself for obeying so easily. You yielded too fast, you knew. Yet, there wasn't enough strength in you to stop him, not when his touch made you feel things no one else was able to.

John "Soap" MacTavish - "distracting kiss"

It didn't matter how many times he did the same thing, you never failed to subtly lose and let him have the win, even if you saw his plan from miles away. You liked to see him happy and if it cost losing a game, you were more than content to let him have the victory.

It wasn't unusual for Soap to try to sabotage you while racing or competing for something. He was prone to mischief and thanks to his competitive nature, games often felt much more high-skate than they were supposed to. You didn't mind that too much though, it was always fun playing something with or against him.

This particular afternoon you two decided to play Mario Kart, getting the idea from an advertisement you heard a few hours prior. After every task was completed for the day, both of your afternoons were free of any other chores, leaving you with a few spare hours to spend. Neither of you owned many games, but luckily Soap managed to get his hands on some stuff — sorry Gaz — so now you were able to play.

Some friendly banter and a few rounds later, the score on the monitor showed how you were a point ahead of him. He thought that just wouldn't do, the little voice in his head egging him on to win against you. So naturally, he came up with a plan that was guaranteed to reap him the victory. He knew it always worked, no matter how many times he had used it on you — not suspecting that maybe that was because you let him get away with it.

When the sound of the next game starting alerted you to focus on the screen, Soap waited for you to get immersed in the race. When your whole attention was on the TV, he put his controller down and leaned over to put a big kiss on your cheek. He didn't stop there, diving back to give you more and more, not letting up even for a second. His kisses were intentionally sloppy, leaving wet spots on your face. He even went as far to use his tongue and lick a stripe up your cheeks, making you screech at him to stop. It wasn't serious of course, you were uncontrollably giggling under his ministrations, trying really hard to focus on the game. It was near impossible though, with how quickly he moved to your nose and ears, tickling them with his breath and messy kisses.

"Soap stop!"

Of course, the moment you put the controller down, he wound his arms around your body and went crazy, kissing all over your neck, shoulders and just anywhere he could reach. You were laughing earnestly under him, your voice cracking and tears gathering in your eyes thanks to how hard your frame shook with your giggles and pleas for him to stop already.

In the end the game was long forgotten, screen going dark over the two cuddling figures on the couch. He truly loved when you were this happy, and if it only took a few kisses and him losing the game, then so be it. Your happiness was more important than his pride anyways.

John Price - "early morning kiss"

He's always been seemingly distant, hard and rugged around the edges. In the rare mornings you spent together, he was always soft and caring; the complete opposite of what people thought of him. It was only then, and only for you.

You've never been a picky person. It wasn't in your nature to demand things you didn't have, to yearn for something that wasn't in any way available for you. It was pointless dwelling on what if's and illusions, staying focused on the present worked way better — you suspected that was part of the reason he found himself drawn to you.

Still, in these scarce moments, you let yourself imagine if you were.

It was barely past 6 in the morning, way too early for someone like you to be awake, much less on a Sunday. There was no way you were going to go back to sleep despite that, not when you had a rare opportunity like this with him.

Price — your John — was quietly snoring next to you, a heavy arm slung over your stomach and head buried between your shoulder and collarbone. His beard slightly scratched your bare skin with every even breath he took — puff, puff, puff — gradually making you drowsy again. You didn't want to go back to the dreamland right now, but you appreciated how he could calm and lull you even in his sleep.

He looked calm like this; the hard lines on his face gone, the angry furrow of his brows absent, annoyed scowl invisible. Price always seemed much younger while resting, when he didn't hold the whole weight of the world on his shoulders. These times, he didn't. There, in your bed and deep asleep, he was just another man. Not a Captain, not a soldier, not a provider: he was ordinary.

You couldn't help basking in the moment, just contently existing next to him in a quiet fashion. Your eyes traced his face over and over again, gaze always ending up on his mouth, slowly moving as he was breathing in and out. Not quite snoring, just having deep relaxed breaths like one makes deep in sleep.

You didn't want to touch him in fear of disturbing his well-earned rest, didn't dare to, but the want to plant a kiss on his lips never truly left the jumbled mess of your thoughts.

It must have been minutes, you noted, when you finally had to stifle a yawn. You decided a few more hours wouldn't hurt in the end, and turned to get into a comfortable position to return to a land of dreams.

"Got tired of me, love?"

His morning voice never failed to send shivers all over your body, no matter how many times you heard it before. Barely moments after he just woke up, his accent heavy and clouded with sleep, voice scratchy like gravel, but in a good, rumbling way — you loved it more than anything. If God's angels had a voice, you were sure they sounded like this.

"Never."

And that was the truth.

As you turned back to look at him, he already had his eyes open and looking at you. His irises were still brimming with dreams, but a slight smile was already playing on his lips. Soft and loving.

"Good."

He leaned in close, just barely touching your lips with his. It wasn't anything special or long, he didn't put much effort in it; yet, it meant more to you than anything else he could ever give.

"Morning darlin'."

[honeytonedhottie]

quality of life‧₊˚✩彡🎐

this post is a collaboration with @prettieinpink my lovely mutual <3 so make sure to check out ur page for the continuation of this post and it has been a PLEASURE to work with her! go and follow her <3

HEALTH : ur health is easily the most important of these categories and ur own health must be prioritized in every thing that u do. health is wealth, and without health, ur quality of life will be very low.

eat foods that are good for u and that nourish you, pay close attention to ur body and how it reacts to certain foods cuz everyones body is different and u should have a vast knowledge on your own body and how it works. eat a variety of fruits and vegetables. a helpful ratio in eating that i like to use as a basic guideline is (80% of the time, eat healthier foods and 20% of the time eat what u crave)

stay hydrated and drink between 1-3 liters of water a day, about 15 minutes before u go to sleep drink a couple glasses of water, drinking water before bed literally CLEANSES you, it improves ur skin, helps ur heart pump blood more efficiently, and improves blood pressure and heart rate, which affects ur quality of sleep in a positive way

to continue on the note of ur sleep u should be sleeping 8-10 hours of sleep a night. sleep deprivation is NOT cute, so please opt to sleep at an earlier time and rise at an earlier time as well

aside from what u consume, take care of ur health by taking supplements, drinking lots of teas, sleeping enough, stretching ur body, dry brushing, lymphatic drainage massage etc

MENTAL WELL BEING : september is suicide prevention month so i feel like now is an AMAZING time to bring up mental health and ways that u can improve ur mental state of being.

i always talk about self concept and i always will because self concept truly is the foundation of everything. ur whole entire life is literally ur mindset. keeping a positive outlook, meditating and practicing gratitude sounds cliche but it does wonders for ur happiness.

understand that its okay to NOT feel happy 24/7 because happiness is simply a feeling, and feelings are fleeting. they dont stay forever. i talked about the science of dopamine and what it does to ur brain in a previous post but some things that u can do to improve ur happiness levels are :

cutting back on social media and screen time in order to experience the world around you

surrounding urself with people who build you up

consuming social media that impacts ur mental health in a positive way

if u can, invest in therapy and if u can't do some shadow work, and based on ur discoveries with shadow work use the resources that u have (like youtube) to learn how to heal from ur trauma properly. healing isn't an overnight process, its a journey but it will DRASTICALLY improve ur quality of life.

find ways to cope and deal with ur emotions in a healthy way if ur going through a hard time, if ur going thru a REALLY hard time please go and seek help bcuz u dont deserve to live in a constant state of sadness, and if u ever need encouragement my inbox is always open 💗

PHYSICAL APPEARANCE : ur physical appearance can greatly impact ur quality of life also so here's some way to maximize ur looks:

sleep, drink water, and walk everyday - the best way to be pretty is to be healthy so make sure ur taking care of ur nutrition and ur sleep schedule

skincare - build a solid skincare routine and be consistent with it, do ur skincare RELIGIOUSLY 2x a day and dont touch ur face with ur hands unless ur washing ur face. double cleanse and dont forget to apply spf &lt;33

haircare - learn what ur hair texture is and watch influencers or people who share the same hair texture as u and watch how they take care of their hair. once u know ur hair type then ur hair will thrive and be healthy

clean nails, long or short its all a matter of preference but keep ur nails clean and done nicely

wearing clothes that fit and complement ur body nicely, get ur clothes tailored to fit ur body comfortably

take good care of ur hair to keep it healthy, and learn how to do ur hair in cute hairstyles.

lastly POSTURE will tie all of this together, ofc these categories were rly broad but u can totally look into them more to maximize ur own looks and beauty

i know dear peachie on youtube has AMAZING makeup tips especially if ur a beginner she can teach u a lot

GENERAL : this is just a broad category of helpful things that u can do to improve the quality of ur life.

manifestation : when u learn about the way that the world works and operates and how ur mind creates ur own reality u will literally step into the power of knowing that you create. start committing to ur dream life and learning about law of assumption

finding little things to be happy about : i feel my happiest when im consciously living. and what i mean about this most of us just live our lives on autopilot out of necessity or habit, but paying closer attention to our lives and our experiences and romanticizing our lives will improve the quality of ur life

decision making : make decisions that will give the quality of life that u wanna live. for the future, make decisions that are good for ur future self instead of just focusing on making decisions that only look good in that one moment. ofc this differs depending on the situation but make an effort to make smart decisions that'll set the foundation for ur future

go check out @prettieinpink for the next part of this post <;3

[emryste]

i know it was between u and a friend but if ur want to i would love to hear wackass character analysis…i love woy and i love hearing peoples thoughts on it on a deeper level!!

ghhhhghfghfhg thank you for asking, it was mostly just me overanalyzing behaviours in some episodes as we did our rewatch. if you're interested, i can gather what little bits i talked about under the cut! as a warning though, theres a lot of words, not all coherent, and most of it is me reading too much into things as well as a lot of personal opinion and bias.

the fremergency fronfract and the boy wander

to start, jay (my friend) mentioned something about seeing a theory relating to the boy wander episode, and how there's something about screwball that makes wander completely shut off to the point of putting on a whole different personality (if anyone thinks they know the post they were talking about, please link it to me! i'd love to read it). all the info we have is screwball is a villain 'from wanders past', and that for whatever reason, he clearly feels like stopping him is more important than befriending him. it's a complete departure from usual wander, and it's part of the reason why i find it so interesting having it follow the fremergency fronfract. in that episode, he is the shining example of what he dislikes screwball for — forcing someone to be happy. he says 'i only present the positive path, i dont force you to follow it' meanwhile in the previous episode took advantage of hater's state and quite literally suggested the dentist should zap hater so hard he would stay good forever.

i dont think this is out of character. at this point in the show, wander is personally attached to hater, cares about him, and is very invested in his happiness. s1 wander, back when they had more of an antagonistic relationship, most likely wouldnt have been selfish in this way. not because he didnt care, because obviously he cares about everyone, but he didnt have that incentive of his own personal feelings. thats why he acted in a way that under normal circumstances, he would think is super dangerous. not to mention, another reason he could be so averse to screwball's ideology is because he sees sometimes sees the same qualities in himself, but they're parts he actively doesnt like and tries not to encourage.

to me, i like the idea that after the fremergency fronfract, wander was feeling guilty about how he acted and his frenzy to keep lord hater as he was. that contributed to why he was so desperate about stopping screwball in that episode, being confronted by someone who is a living specimen of something you feel guilty about would definitely rattle you. as my friend said, it's like karma came back to bite him.

the toddler

a fun little thing i think about during the toddler episode is how wander and sylvia's parenting styles could be indicative of their own childhoods. sylvia makes sense considering what we see of her mum in her family episode and what her environment was like growing up, however with wander it's a bit trickier. my first instinct was either wander had no parents/family of his own so he doesnt fully understand the dynamic, or they were terrible/negligent. perhaps both. this idea mostly comes from wander not really grasping what looking after a child is like apart from his surface level view of what he thinks would work. sylvia's approach isn't as effective but is more indicative of how a lot of parents raise their kids and says a lot about how she was raised, in comparison to wander's which is idealistic and purely thinking about what the toddler wants to a detrimental degree. that, to me, sounds like someone who either has no idea how kids are actually raised, or who is trying desperately to give a toddler what they didnt have. but in the end, potentially all of that could just be considered moot since wander is an normally idealistic guy, and maybe it doesnt say anything about his childhood at all. fun to think about though!

the wanders

for the episode 'the wanders', i talked about how i feel like the wander who always does what you tell him not to (pathological demand avoidance wander as my friend called him lol) could also be the one responsible for his need for freedom and not staying in one place for too long. my reasoning here was the link between not wanting to be told what to do (valuing your free will and autonomy) and how that relates to wander's inclination for being nomadic. i could definitely go deeper into this but you get the picture.

also during 'the wanders', me and jay obviously spoke a little about the 'most important part' wander. they mentioned how whilst he did look tiny he still had the hat, so it's still technically current wander. but rather, it's a part of him that sees himself as helpless, and is a physical manifestion of that by being small and vulnerable. what i always found interesting was how wanders physical form came back before that part was added, whilst the other parts of him all needed to be there for his form to be actualized.

i dont know if the reasoning for this has been answered by one of the crew before, but my reading into it was just that it could be because of a variety of reasons. like maybe that part of him isn't part of his personality but rather something else, like a memory. or maybe, since when sylvia was putting him together and one of the other wanders said something like "if you dont accept all of us, you accept none of us" (relating to make wander whole again), it was something that those aspects of wander didnt want to be part of him even though actual wander saw it as an important part. whatever the reason is, it's always been something that itched at my brain after that episode.

lord hater's and cpeeps' motives

also, i very lightly touched on the topic of lord hater's whole character motivation boiling down to him wanting admiration, to be taken seriously and for people to love/care about him. meanwhile, whilst peepers also wants to be taken seriously, it feels less from a need for love but instead a compulsion to prove himself. to prove he can do things and be powerful despite his shortcomings (literally), which also leans into why we can see peepers' being more evil/ruthless than hater at times. he wants to be admired, but in a different way, to seen as competent.

and thats all the theorizing i did during that rewatch. i could talk about little intricacies and headcanons on how i view the characters for a billion years, but that would definitely make this too long LOL for the rest of the rewatch we just enjoyed the show and had a silly little time. for your enjoyment and as a thanks for reading, heres some highlights of (mainly) my friend whilst we watched:

[according2thelore]

Hi I love your writing so much! Your late seasons/early seasons verse is one of the most interesting things to come out of this fandom, and I’m always impressed with you well you understand the characters. I was wondering, Do you think the earlier seasons boys would find any parts of later seasons Sam and Dean to be similar to John? You don’t have to answer, if you’re too busy with other asks. Have a great day!

oh shit?? holy shit??

anon?? kissing u with passion rn, anon. this compliment just made the rest of my week + an extra bonus week! i don't even know what to say! BUT THANK YOU!!!!!!!!!!

and YES! I DO! we talked about this in my post on tuesday, but what specific parts of each LS!Sam&Dean remind them of john?? oh worm? let's discuss!

For ES!Sam:

again, i think LS!Sam reminds him the most of john, for a couple of reasons. for sam, he experienced john's parenting as mostly arguing and being unwilling to discuss/hear sam out. it's his way or the highway, and that's something sam really resents about his father (we're not breaking new ground here, lol.) he also hates not being treated like an equal/adult, and resents john for hiding things from him, and keeping him at a distance. sounds familiar? sam getting mad at john for being stubborn is real kettle-pot behaviour, but i digress. LS!Sam absolutely makes the ban on telling-them-the-future conversations. he has a very set idea of how things are supposed to go, and how they are supposed to act. he gets easily frustrated with ES!Sam because ES!Sam presses and presses and presses and wants to Be A Part Of Every Conversation All The Time. ES!Sam resents LS!Sam for "babying" him/not treating him like an equal. ES!Sam felt very patronized by john, and feels very patronized by LS!Sam--the holier-than-thou, i-know-better-than-you-end-of-discussion rubs him WRONG.

as for LS!Dean, i think he would appreciate the softness of him. john had quiet moments. again, if we're going with S!2, sam has softened towards his father in retrospect, so he's primed with john's better moments while he's mourning. LS!Dean is protective. he says simple facts, and it feels like more than the words do (you're my brother. and of course i look out for you. and yes, i am happy. and come here for a second. and are you okay?) he can of course see some of john's anger, but i think it would bother him a little less, because LS!Dean makes such a concentrated effort to make him feel included, and a part of this future. he invites sam out to the garage and cooks him breakfast and they bond over common things, like movies pre-2006. the most negative thing he can say about LS!Dean and john is his control. while LS!Sam is more stubborn, LS!Dean is more controlling. he's a little smothering with his mothering.

For ES!Dean:

with all the fawning he does, he sees mostly john's good qualities in LS!Sam. specifically, i think he sees a lot of the "doting" aspects of john's personality. sam keeps knick-knacks and photographs and takes charge like nobody's business. he's in charge because things work well that way. he's decisive, and true to himself, and knows exactly what he wants when he wants it. he has a truly encyclopedic knowledge of monsters, and is intensely protective of those in his life. the most negative thing he can say about LS!Sam and john is that LS!Sam tends to give orders. which ES!Dean follows, because while he wasn't always sure about dad, sammy has his best intentions at heart. unlike dad, sammy will never ask the impossible of him. sammy knows best.

however, he sees a lot of negative traits in LS!Dean. dad was absent, and emotionally manipulative, and drunk. he had a lot of anger that he kept beneath the surface, and you could be joking with him the one minute and being scolded in the other. you felt like the most important person in his world (high burden of emotional needs) and then he'd disappear for two months and leave you to fend for yourself. very up/down. he never remembers your birthday, but while elbow-deep into a fifth of whisky, he tells you that you and sammy are the only reason he still cares to be alive. he sees LS!Dean's short fuse, and it makes him angry. and it makes him sad. he sees the bottles and bottles and bottles of liquor that they have in the sammy-mandated recycling bin. he sees the hard set of his jaw and the crease between his brows, and the short, sharp replies. then he sees LS!Dean's soft looks with ES!Sam, his quiet devotion to LS!Sam, the far-away stare at nothing. he sees his father, haunted by ghosts and on a mission that LS!Dean seems hyper-focused on, but unsure what it is. so he tries to hyper-control everyone around him, and is so up/down about it that it gives dean whiplash.

i think overall, they will be a lot more critical of themselves than they will be of each other (bc this show loves to capitalize on some self-hating man pain, which...y'know. slay. that's why we're here.) so i think a lot of their perception of "john" qualities will be skewed. especially since we see S!2 boys, but especially dean, be more critical of their relationship with john.

if you had an angry man in your house, you will always have an angry man in your house, etc. etc.

again, i have NO IDEA if these john takes are hot takes because charlotte and i just go "i agree!" "i agree!" back and forth in an endless loop whenever we discuss the man in question. but i hope this was fun!

anyway, i hope YOU have a great day, anon! i hope i answered this in a time when you'll see it! i always worry about anons not being able to see these when i reply bc y'all don't get notified.

but know that this meant so much to me! and i hope you're doing well this fine thursday! i always have time for you, blessed nonnie!

mwah!

-lizzy <3

[ca-suffit]

Almost 50 years old with a job, spouse, and kid and sending each other asks like this to feel superior over an online space of mainly 20 somethings lol. Everyone in "that (black) subset" already knows who these characters are and can confront the topics v easily. All this Nalyra group can do is post things like OHH NOBODY IS READY FOR THIS OHH WE'RE SO MUCH BETTER AND SMARTER THAN THESE (BLACK) PEOPLE. It also may surprise u to learn that slavery existed in America and this fantasy Daddy Marius thing u think ppl can't tolerate is nothing compared to real history. You'll never understand that though because you'd have to acknowledge race and real life outside of Anne Rice books to do that. You'd feel so embarrassed by how u sound if u did tho. like this is rly braindead shit lol. I bet you get off to this though, sounding like a ten year old edgelord to own the woke mob. But you're just v typical racists, lol, while layering on some bs "did u know there's a worse white man than Lestat, did u ever use ur brains." Ok lol. Groundbreaking, more than one white man is shitty. How could we ever imagine such a world?! Marius existing won't make Lestat suddenly be less. Aren't you the ones always crowing that he's the main character? Oh but I forgot, you think it'll all be retconned once "the truth (Lestat's story)" comes out, because you have Anne Rice brain rot and think that's quality storytelling instead of embarrassing and insulting to the audience. You also talk like this as if you won't be screaming and throwing up about it when the show doesn't coddle Marius either and make this all sexy roleplaying. Armand was just referred to as Marius' "sub" in another recent post by crazy white fandom book people. You're the ones who won't be able to handle what's coming. Then you'll just keep moving the goal post, saying shit like this forever so you can keep yourself feeling superior. It's sad u don't go to therapy and talk about why this is the thing that makes you feel in control of your life.

Virginia is a whole psych study 2 lol. Honey u have to separate urself from the fictional man and get real help. Having racist tantrums because black people can understand your man better than u is not it. He's not real, he's not you. It's funny how book ppl are always saying the books teach empathy when you're intolerant of anyone who disagrees with you (or is just black). tbf, that is one way u actually understand Lestat tho lol. These people have all the time in the world to excuse shitty behavior from white men due to trauma, mental illness, "their time period," but Louis, Claudia, and Armand are also victims and yet just victimized more in the fandom. We can't even discuss fr "memory is a monster" without you dipshits being racist about it. How many posts about Episode 5 have we gd had since the last trailer dropped, when that's something you had to go frame by frame to even catch, and also make a lot of assumptions some things are even from that scene. You can't appreciate any of the rest of the story, you're obsessively zeroed in on Lestat being freed from all guilt of DV. You're sick in the head with your love of whiteness.