#i’ve been hoping for this basically since it was revealed that jim was gonna be on the show

[xspuhurax]

Some of you haven’t been in the trenches for a decade, fueled only by two movies and a dead kid and constantly feeling alone in shipping Jim/Carol, and it shows

[darkficsyouneveraskedfor]

Portrait of a Dangerous Man🎨4

Warnings: (series) non-consent sex and rape; slow creep; cucking; (this chapter) only plot hehe

This is dark!mob!Clark Kent x reader and explicit. 18+ only.  Your media consumption is your own responsibility. Warnings have been given. DO NOT PROCEED if these matters upset you.

Synopsis: Your dream of having your work hung in an art show comes true but your first buyer is not all he seems to be.

Note: I’m at my tipping point, I swear. I’m dealing with everything in our household, new bed (delayed delivery yay!), cleaning, cooking, dog walking, and working. My only escape are my fics and this weekend I’m telling everyone to fuck off so I can do the writeathon... but sorry for the rant, enjoy more Clark.

Thanks to everyone for reading and thanks in advance for all your feedback. :)

I really hope you enjoy. 💋

<3 As usual, I’d appreciate if you let me know what you think with a like or reblog or reply or an ask! Love ya!

Wednesday trickled by like sand in a glass. You could hardly keep your eyes open as you typed away and a double espresso shot was the only thing that saw you through your hours at the gallery. Vanessa was excited for her next event and already asking after some new pieces from you. You promised her some from your storage unit to stave her off as you held in your yawns. 

You collapsed into bed that night beside Marcus. He complained about his day until he drifted off and you followed suit shortly after. You awoke with a decision, the echoes of your boyfriend’s gripes in your head and heart. You hated how miserable his job made him, how dull your own was. It felt like there was nothing else but the almighty dollar.

You called Clark after an email to Jim, your nerves alight in anticipation of the disgruntled reply. It didn’t matter. You were done. You didn’t need to worry about the all caps messages and curt zoom calls.

“Hey,” Clark picked up, he sounded out of breath.

“Oh, hey, sorry, it’s me,” you swiveled in your chair, “I hope I’m not disturbing you.”

“Nope, just getting in a work out,” he grunted, “you’re not bugging me if you have good news for me.”

“I think… I do,” you forced out, “I just sent in my resignation.”

“Mmm, you don’t sound… happy,” he hummed.

“I am, I think I’m just processing it,” you replied, “I said I’d let you know today so I’m letting you know.”

“Well, how soon can you be here?” he asked.

“Today?”

“Sure, why not?”

“I guess, I could leave as soon as you want me,” you said.

“I’ll send a car,” he intoned, “I’ll give the driver your number, if you don’t mind.”

“Yeah,” your voice almost squeaked, “I can do that.”

“Alright, sweetheart, see ya soon.”

The line cut out and you lowered your phone slowly. You stared at Outlook and the new email icon along the taskbar. You closed the laptop and stood. You could worry about the fallout later, right now, you had to get ready for another day of painting.

🎨

It was starting to feel like deja vu every time you arrived at Clark’s house. You got out and thanked the drive, Jeremy, before he drove off. The doors opened before you got to the top of the steps and your host was already dressed in the same outfit he wore for each session. His hair was neat but his beard was even thicker than before.

“I think you can tell I’m a little antsy to start,” he chuckled, “how are you, sweetheart?”

That pet name caught in your mind again. It might just be a habit of his. Nothing more than an absent-minded word.

“Me too, honestly,” you smiled, “but I have a weird question for you.”

“Ask away,” he said as he walked with you through the foyer.

“The beard… you want that in the portrait or--”

“Oh, ha, yeah,” he ran his fingers along his jawline, “I guess I wasn’t thinking. You’re the artist, what do you think?”

“Well, erm, either way is fine,” you said, “I was just… wondering. I’m not even close to starting on, uh, you yet. I mean, right now I’m just working on the background and basic shapes.”

“I’ll let you make the call when you get there,” he said, “say the word and it’s gone.”

“Alright,” you came to the top of the stairs and he pointed you ahead of him.

He followed you as you entered and you went about filling the jar with water and resituating the set up. He sat as you mixed and chose your brush. You climbed the ladder and peered around the canvas at him. He took on the same pose as usual and you dipped the bristles into the pigment. You could make a happy life of this.

🎨

Clark shifted and cleared his throat. You rolled your wrist and glanced back over at him as you drew your hand back from the canvas. He braced the chair and pushed himself up.

“How about a break?” he asked as he shook out his arms, “back’s a bit stiff.”

“Sure,” you said, “I think I could sit down for a moment.”

You took a step down the rung of the ladder but your toe slipped and suddenly your palette was against your chest. You slid down backwards as Clark rushed over and barely kept you from toppling the entire thing over. You laughed at yourself as he righted you and looked down at your paint-streaked shirt.

“Jesus,” you muttered.

“You okay?” he asked as he kept his hand on your upper arm, “be careful.”

“Yeah, I’m-- clumsy, is all,” you carefully pulled away and set down your brush and palette.

“Come on, sit,” he pulled up the stool and planted it before you, “take a minute.”

As you sat, he stretched his arms over his head and then out to the sides. He paced around the other side of the table, long strides as he worked the cramps from his long legs. He stopped and came up to play with a brush as you leaned an elbow on the table.

“Well, I did have another offer for you,” he said, “I was thinking of waiting but might as well ask now.”

“Oh?” you raised your brows curiously.

He swished a slender brush in the air then lowered it and picked at the tip.

“I’m having a get together on Saturday, some business friends and the like,” he said as he set the brush back with the rest, “it won’t be work. You’ve earned some time off. You can even bring the boyfriend.”

“Saturday?” you pondered, “I’m usually at the gallery on Saturdays.”

“It would be great networking,” he said, “and I already told all my friends about you. They’re excited to see your work. It will almost be like a viewing and it’s only right the artist is there.”

“I could make it work,” you mulled, “Marcus would love to come back.” You snickered, “he loves this place.”

“It’s a nice house,” he said casually, “a bit big for one person… hence, the party.”

“I’ll put it in my calendar,” you stood and slid your palette closer and cleaned it off to remix the mess of paints.

“Great,” he said as he rounded the table and brushed close to you, “it’ll be nice to look at a mug besides mine, huh?”

You laughed as you squeezed out the dark paint and nodded, “ha, sure.”

🎨

The rest of your week was spent much the same. Jeremy drove you to Clark’s and you went up to the studio to continue your work between small talk and silences that grew so thick you had to break them with mindless comments. It wasn’t enough to focus on the path of your brush as the man tugged at your attention.

Marcus was excited when you told him about the party. He raved about how he needed to let loose, about how much expensive alcohol he was going to drink, and the awesome backflip he was gonna do into the pool. You reminded him, he hadn’t done anything like that since college but he swore he could still do it.

You didn’t share the sentiment. You were anxious. You were flattered to be invited but despite what Clark said, it still felt like work. His friends were going to be there and he apparently was trying to sell them on your art. 

You didn’t realise until after you hit send on your email, but you put your livelihood in this man’s hands. A man, you reminded yourself, who was little more than a stranger.

On Friday, a day you were thankfully not called to the mansion to teeter on the ladder and paint, the buzzer rang and drew you off the couch from amid your YouTube binge. The man on the speaker called back that he had a delivery and you let him up. You took the box from him, the thick silver ribbon giving away the sender even before you could read the tag.

Inside you found a black dress with little gemstones set into the fabric like stars in the sky. It was nicer than anything you’d ever owned before and a pair of silver shoes were tucked in beneath the outfit. You took the shoes from the tissue paper and something else shifted in the bottom.

You reached in and revealed a velvet box from the depths of overzealous stuffing. You opened the lid and found a simple chain of diamonds. You gaped in disbelief. They were real. The fake ones didn’t look so nice.

You phone chimed before you could even think to call Clark. It was as if he could see you. You answered and your voice warbled pathetically.

“Hi, I was just gonna call,” you touched your throat as it constricted.

“Yeah? I got the notification that it was delivered,” he said, “you like it?”

“It’s too much,” you gulped out, “really, I can’t--”

“I want you to look nice. I want you to feel good and have a good time,” he said, “I feel like you’ve been working so hard. You need a chance to just let it all go.”

“Look, I…” you were uncertain how to handle it. It was more than generosity but you felt wrong denying it as much as you did accepting it, “I’ve never had a boss buy me diamonds. At least let me give those back.”

“Boss?” he mused on the word, “I suppose, but you gotta dress the part now, sweetheart. You’re gonna rub shoulders with a lot of rich dicks like me. Pardon my language.”

“I didn’t realise it was such an upscale thing,” you put the velvet box down and turned to sit on the couch beside the large box. You played with the silver ribbon and chewed your lip.

“Sweetheart, it’s nothing, you got this,” he said, “trust me, if you can win me over, my friends will be child’s play.”

“Mhmmm,” you stared at the tv mindlessly, “Clark?”

“Yeah?”

“Why are you doing all this?”

There was silence and you heard him sigh then a subtle metallic click.

“Because I can. And you’re a talented artist. Didn’t all the big painters used to have patrons back in the day? You know, Da Vinci and all that.”

“Sure, I guess--”

“Look, sweetheart, I’m glad you like the dress, I gotta go.”

He hung up abruptly and you turned your phone to stare at it in confusion. You were starting to get a bad feeling and that little voice in that back of your head, that little sabotaging bitch, whispered in your ear. No, you wouldn’t let your self-doubt get the best of you this time. You either grabbed this chance or you spent the rest of your life doing menial work and painting the world as it passed you by.

🎨

Friday night, Marcus couldn’t stop rambling about the party the next day. You just couldn’t get over the tickle in your chest, the same one you got before job interviews and doctor’s appointments. You were on edge, even as you spent your stress on him, your body writhing against his as you panted and pouted. It had been a while since you fucked. All the work and the stress had just let things slip past you. Maybe with your new gig, you could get back to those early days when it was all you wanted to do.

You slept soundly. You blamed the sex and the momentous week. You got up, had a lazy brunch time meal, and beat Marcus at MarioKart several times over before he convinced you it was time to get ready. 

You pulled on the gifted outfit after fighting with your make-up and hair. You gave a little tada spin to Marcus and he lifted his brow as he tried to figure out his tie.

“Wow, where’d you get that?” he purred, “fuck, let’s be late.”

He ran his hands over your hips as you neared him and fixed his tie for him. You giggled and planted a kiss on his lips.

“Jeremy’s on his way,” you warned, “I don't wanna bite the hand that feeds.”

“Oh, and it feeds you well,” Marcus chirped, “you think he’ll let me have a spin in the McClaren?”

“Maybe, but I wouldn’t. I don’t need to scrape you off the side of the road,” you took your phone as the screen lit up, “come on, he’s here.”

“Fuck, babe, really, you’re gonna make me follow you out of here with your ass looking like that?”

“Stop,” you tittered, “you know, there might be more sellers tonight?”

“Oh yeah? I guess you’ll be paying a mortgage soon enough.”

“Me?” you scoffed.

“Sure, I’ll be your sugar baby,” he kidded.

“Well, baby is accurate,” you teased as you stepped onto the elevator, “please, just behave.”

🎨

You were surprised to see Vanessa at the party but reassured to see a familiar face. Clark had been distracted by his other guests and you did your best to mingle, letting Marcus take the lead until he was distracted by another guest’s Rolex and started asking too many questions. If you did start selling art to these kinds, you suspected you’d be paying for a lot of overpriced brands. That was a worry for another time.

You stood with Vanessa and a man she introduced you to. Bruce Wayne was tall and his dark-hair was combed back neatly as he spoke over the glass of wine in his hand. You were bored of the Monet-Manet argument, one you’d heard a million times from the stubborn gallery owner, and you were at your limit of socialisation.

You excused yourself and put down your unfinished drink on a table. You looked around but couldn’t see Marcus anywhere. The last you saw him, he was with Clark but you couldn’t find him either. You frowned and wandered between the pairs and trios gabbing around the room.

Just past the bar, you looked back and still no sign of either man. You huffed and your heels clicked into the foyer and to the stairs. You’d go to the studio and sit for a moment and collect yourself. You just needed to take a breath.

You climbed the stairs slowly, the din of the party floating up behind you. You came to the top but stopped as your eyes were drawn to a pair of open doors opposite the studio. You neared and stayed against the wall as you peeked inside. Marcus admired an old-six shooter and spun the barrel.

“You got everything, man, I swear,” you hid behind the door frame and listened.

“Eh, it’s all just things,” Clark replied, “I bought that from an auctioneer down in Texas. A verified antique but it just hangs here. Not good for much but looking at it.”

“Dude, what I wouldn’t do to live here? Have cool guns and even cooler cars? Shit, you know how fucked it is that my lady is making bank and I’m over here with my dick in my hands? I mean, I’m proud of her but… I mean, if I could get paid thousands for drawing, I would’ve tried to learn.”

“She’s good. Dedicated,” Clark remarked, “she’s special. Worth more than money.”

Marcus hummed and you heard the barrel click back into the place. Neither of the men spoke as you heard something shift and Clark cleared his throat. Subtle footsteps moved around the room and you pressed yourself to the wall. You should leave and let them talk but you couldn’t help but be curious.

“Isn’t she?” Clark prodded.

“Y-yeah, but… I don’t know. I just wish I had more,” Marcus said, “I probably sound like a chump, huh?”

“You can’t have it all,” Clark replied.

“Says the guy who can buy anything and everything,” Marcus moped.

“Oh?” Clark intoned, “so… how about it then? Fifty thousand.”

“For what?” Marcus chuckled nervously.

“Her,” Clark answered.

“Her-- I… my girlfriend?” he sputtered.

“If money can buy me anything, that’s what I want,” Clark said firmly, “it’s a one time offer… whether or not you agree to it, I’m gonna fuck her.”

You skin crawled at his words and you covered your mouth in disgust and shock. You inched closer to the door to hear better as you waited for the response.

“One hundred,” Marcus said.

“Seventy-five,” Clark countered.

“That’s my girlfriend, dude,” Marcus hissed.

“And yet you’re haggling with me over her. Eighty.”

You tore yourself from the wall before you could hear anymore. You felt hollow and heavy all at once. Your eyes were glossy as you scurried over to the studio doors and pushed the left one open. You unhooked the diamond necklace and tossed it onto the paint-stained palette and rolled up your brushes.

You stormed over blindly to the easel and pushed it over. It clattered to the floor loudly but you were already out the door and halfway down the stairs. You gripped your clutch and the bundle of paintbrushes tightly as you continued on outside and the blurred outlines of luxury cars passed you by. 

You stomped up the long drive in your heels as you flicked away tears and pulled out your phone. You knew it was too good to be true. Any of it; your art, Clark, Marcus. You weren’t good for anyone unless they could get something out of you.

[peppersonironi]

DUKE THOMAS ISN’T THE SANE ONE! A guide by Pepper

So, I have seen so many people writing Duke incorrectly, and I wanted to do something about it. In fanon, he is described as the sane bat, who would rather stay home and safe, and absolutely never join in shenanigans. Now, I know there are a lot of things wrong with canon, but Duke is one of the better parts! He is an interesting character who is actually just as chaotic as the rest of the gotham vigilantes. And so it it is quite unfair to his character to say he is the 'Arnold from the Magic Schoolbus' of the group. He's really not.

So I decided to make a list of ten instances in the comics where he disobeys Bruce, acts reckless, or is just a bat! (also for a Batfam Group Chat I’m a part of, someone asked for these) I hope this helps people understand his character better, and maybe even inspire them to write more about him? Seriously, Tag me if you do. I'm starved for good Duke content!

Feel free to add more in the comments, these are just what I could think of off the top of my head! (Hence the kinda weird order, sry)

1. He's a vigilante

Okay, so this is a bit obvious, but I still think it needs saying. You think that a guy who dresses in bright yellow and patrols the most crime-ridden city in the world during the day is 100% sane?

2. We Are Robin

Also obvious, but still. This guy joins a group of untrained teenage robins who just want to make a difference. And they do! It's still pretty reckless, though. 

3. He tried to take on the Riddler

In case you didn't know, in the beginning of New 52 (Zero year, specifically) the Riddler essentially held Gotham Hostage. He had some spiel about someone giving him a riddle he couldn't solve, and letting the city go. You know who decided he would be that person? Duke Thomas! He trained in brain-teasers, and puzzles, tirelessly worked. He became quite the adept riddler (not the villain). The kick? He was a child! (Look at the above panels, isn't he cute?) Duke was young, yet determined. And if that's not a bat quality, I don't know what is.

4. He escaped the cops by jumping off a bridge.

Oh no! Duke is in a police car! Oh no! He's on a bridge! What's he going to do?! Why, jump out and off the bridge while proclaiming "I am Robin" of course! Seriously, look at that panel and try to argue that he is the responsible goody-two-shoes of the family.

5. He talked down an enraged Damian

Basically, Damian was manipulated into joining the court of owls. Duke, who refused to believe that Robin genuinely joined them, fought him and talked him down. Now, this is Damian we're talking about. Sure, the kid is absolutely adorable and can be incredibly caring (Fight me on this, I dare you. Also, frick you DC), but when he's on a rampage, there is little that can stop him. So of course Duke decides to take care of it!

6. He actively tries to have a relationship with Damian.

Okay, so this one is a little weak, but I wanted an excuse to share those panels. Aren't those two great?! But seriously, Duke ignores that this tiny child could kill him in more ways than he could count, and even invites him to a movie! He also isn't afraid to tease the kid, unlike other members of the family. Knowing Damian can honestly be hard sometimes.

7. Comes back to the city when Bruce told him to get out.

During the I Am Bane arc of Tom King's Batman (I'm shuddering. So sorry for invoking his name!) Bruce tells the batboys to get out of Gotham and STAY out. the others are like 'we're not gonna listen, right?' and Duke is all 'you can't ignore BATMAN!' and walks off saying he's gonna listen to Bruce. This seems like pretty damning evidence, right? He's actually sane? The others got attacked by Bane and hung, but Duke didn't. Well, then you look at the next panel! (it takes place later in the volume) There he is, disobeying Bruce, and hanging out in Gotham. Not just that, he's out in costume! No, Duke couldn't just hunker down in an apartment, he had to go out and take down crooks, and warn Jim Gordon. I think that's pretty self-explanatory

8. Goes out while Injured

Those two panels are back-to-back in The Cursed Wheel (originally printed in All-Star Batman, later put into Batman and the Signal). As you can see, Bruce tells Duke to get rest. Duke was just attacked by Zsasz, and suffered multiple injuries. He wakes up, and the thing that would make the most sense would be for him to go to sleep, right? Well, he instead gets suited up and goes out to work on a case. Pretty much every bat has done this at some point. Not quite the smartest move, right? A touch reckless, wouldn’t you say?

9. That whole thing with Green Lantern

(sry for the weird sizing, I don’t have the comic to take screenshots) 

So there are two parts to this. First of, you have Green Lantern flying into the batcave, looking around, and there’s no Batman present. So what does Duke Do? Well, he certainly doesn’t stay back and contact Bruce! Nope, instead he attacks a member of the Justice League, a member of the Green Lantern Corp. Later on, you know what he says? He thought he would be fine because his suit is bright yellow. That’s it. A bit crazy, right?

Secondly, he gets roped into exploring the cave with Hal (I thinks it’s Hal, been a bit since I read this though). The Lantern has some thing going on about stuff in the cave, but that’s not important. What’s important is that Duke went along with it. He was curious enough to ignore what Bruce would say (Call him, yet anything remotely green out of the cave), and joins in! He does’t say “this is a bad idea” or “we shouldn’t be doing this” nope!

9. When he ran off with Cass to test his powers

Oh no, Duke got shadow powers! What’s he gonna go? Why, go off and have fun experiment of course! Duke and Cass head out to test and work on Duke’s newly presented abilities, and specifically don’t tell Bruce! This is information he would like to know, of course. It’s important to know if your newest protege gets more powers. But no, they go out of their way to sneakily test the extent of his powers. They get caught, of course, and then get chewed out (They get caught in costume, but the next panel they’re in civvies. I find that outrageously funny!). And here’s the kicker: they don’t really apologize! Sure, Duke gives a half-heart apology, but he doesn’t really mean it. Not even under the full extent of the Batglare™.

10. Rescuing Bruce with practically no training

I’ll skip all the plotty stuff, so just know that Bruce was out alone and in some deep doo-doo. Duke was back at the cave, working stuff out with Alfred. He realizes that what Bruce is doing is a trap. Now, just so you know, this is back when Duke was JUST taken in by Bruce. He doesn’t even have a codename yet! Barely any training. So you know what he does? He heads out anyway, and rescues Bruce. Now, check out that music he’s playing. Later on, it’s revealed to be Duke’s fave band. You know the name of that band? “Batman’s @^$&@” I’m not even joking. (I’m not sure what bleeped out, though later on it’s referred to as “Batman’s #$%” So I assume it’s ass?). So on top of being reckless, he plays a heavy metal band with a name that’s … special to say the least. He has guts, you gotta admit (Oh, and he seemed so gleeful when he told Bruce the name of the band!).

And there you have it! This list is far from complete, but I think it’s a good start. Feel free to reblog with your own, or any questions/comments! I absolutely love to talk about Duke, so don’’t be afraid to message me! Also, correct me if I wrote anything incorrect here. It’s been a while since I’ve read some of these, so I may have gotten some stuff wrong.

[geekgemsspooksandtoons]

The Mask 1994

*I finally wrote the whole thing. I finally watched the movie that involved something I’ve been talking about A LOT. I think this took about an hour since I finished the movie. Forgot to mention Charlie.*

I wanna make this clear, even before I watched movie or ever writing this. I am legitimately a stupid and lazy person. Because my mom told me about this, and last week, my dad rented A Quiet Place Part 2. When I was trying to go to sleep but was looking up movies...I literally forgot my tv can do that too...and that I can rent or buy a movie...I rented the movie this morning, and deleted it afterwards...after all that talk...I could’ve done that...wow. I should do that more considering some movies I wanna see or like. Not too much though. My tv has DirecTV. Just a heads up.

But a few or couple of minutes ago, I finally watched The Mask film from 1994. This post is gonna be filled with spoilers and it’s gonna get long. Gonna be kind of a review. My overall thoughts on it. This was my first reaction to the whole movie.

I’d just wanna talk about this too. I like comic books, I like comic book movies. Mainly my favorites are ones like all of Zack Snyder’s DCEU movies, Spider-Man 1 & 2, The Suicide Squad 2021, Wonder Woman 2017, The Dark Knight(Despite whatever issues I have with it), and Joker 2019. Yeah, those are mainly DC films and two Marvel related ones. I don’t even mind Spider-Man 3 as well. I also forgot Dredd 2012 is another one of my favorites. Along with Batman 1989.

I was hoping The Mask could make that list of favorites. Because I read the comics first. I don’t think I ever watch the movie fully as a kid MAYBE. I’m a fan of the comics, I know this movie was gonna be a lighter take on the series. 

In a nutshell...I liked it. It’s possible it will be on that list of favorite CBM’s...but I want to talk about it. I’ll also admit I think what got me interested in seeing this film and this series was me liking Jim Carrey as Ace Ventura...now, let’s get to the point.

Yeah, I liked it. I thought the movie was genuinely entertaining. Despite seeing some clips before. But also Ryan Hollinger’s video about it. Revealing the ending, the twist, and other stuff. But I didn’t wanna watch more more that I haven’t seen yet.

I will be honest, it still made me laugh. Even some scenes I already have seen. I will admit, the Cuban Pete scene is actually one of my favorites. XD But what also surprised me is that at times, despite being a funny film. It can genuinely be touching in a way. And I am mainly talking about the developing relationship between Stanley and Tina.

I just wanna talk about the characters right now. I’ll just admit unless I haven’t already. I’m a Jim Carrey fan. Mainly because of his more goofier roles. Particularly his roles from the Ace Ventura movies, Liar Liar, and especially Sonic The Hedgehog. I also will admit this, Jim Carry nails playing Big Head or who they call...The Mask in this movie...I’ll nitpick about that later.

But yeah, Jim’s entertaining as Big Head in this film. He does make me laugh. But I think another role he does well despite there are some sillier moments, which is fine. I feel like in a way, Stanley Ipkiss in this version, is maybe one of his more normal roles. But I know I’m wrong considering whatever other roles he’s in. He portrays a likable good guy who’s sadly mainly pushed around. Which is quite the difference from the comics, except being pushed around. But that’s another topic. Yet for this story, even if maybe Stanley’s name could be changed. But him being a genuinely kind guy works for this story.

Even before I saw the movie, learning more about this version about the character. I can relate to Stanley in some ways honestly. Which is something that I like. He basically shines as a protagonist. 

He portrays both sides well. Despite at times...honestly, this Stanley is wacky. I shouldn’t be judging. Jim does a good stuff with what he played, and he’s the highlight of this movie. He also delivers possibly my favorite Jim Carrey line of all time now. Sorry if I get this wrong. I was looking for a clip of it to help me.

“Daddy’s gonna go kick some ass”. A literal line from Jim Carrey in this movie and I love it. He even brings a pistol with him.

I also wanna admit Peter Greene as Dorian is pretty good as a villain. The dude can be threatening and he works with what he is given. And he’s effective as an antagonist. I just wanna admit that I swear, one of these guys. One of them could’ve Walter in a way and I just think that could’ve been possible. But I’m not sure. Just one of Dorian’s henchmen looked like a huge guy. It just got me thinking about Walter from the comics.

Will admit, I think Kellaway is fine. And I just found out Christopher Reeve was one of the actors considered for the role...damn. But again, Kellaway was fine. He’s more like a supporting character and again, this is like an origin story. I do feel bothered Lionel Ray wasn’t added but replaced with this Doyle character. I will admit that Doyle is silly, which is the point of his character. I guess the writers and director didn’t want two sensible cops or something. I like Kellaway alright, but I’ll always dig Lionel too.

I really wanted to get this point. I thought Cameron Diaz was good as Tina Carlyle and Amy Yasbeck as Peggy Brandt. I will admit, I do strangely like the subversion with Peggy in a way with it’s twist. I get the idea if that it was going for that theme of, “We all wear mask” and Peggy turning Stanley into the mob said a lot about her character. While Tina was genuinely the one that truly supported Stanley.

I think was surprised me more was the fact despite Peggy turned in Stanley for selfish purposes such as paying for her condo. Yet what surprised me more was she was actually concerned for Stanley being killed, and didn’t want him hurt...which explains even more why she stuck around in the cartoon. And honestly, it makes me glad the director took out that deleted scene of her getting killed. So she wasn’t that heartless.

Also...it made me think that...my ideas and changes towards her character...maybe hold some weight.

I’ll just put this out there too. Milo is great, one of my favorite fictional dogs maybe. Good dog.

Trying to think what else, the score was fine. But the licensed music was good or something. Overall, I think my negatives could be just...nitpicks. Such as the Big Head part I wanted to talk about. Listen, I understand this is a different version. I just feel it’s weird to call him, “The Mask” instead of Big Head. I know other characters mask in their name or something. But...some reasons, the name Big Head is there. I guess it’s because of the title or something.

Honestly, I think my negatives are more that it feels short. And maybe Stanley becoming Big Head a bit too early. I sound kind of stupid, I know. But this was the 90′s and whatever else. This was a different take on the comics. But I did genuinely like it. Maybe I’m just a bit attached to those comics. Despite knowing the changes they did.

But I will admit, considering the development for this film. And learning that it was meant to be a horror film. But the director Charles Russell found the violence in the source material to be off putting. So he made it less grim, and more fun. I’ve also read somewhere that trying to make comedy with that violence was difficult.

Back to the point, to be honest. I feel like for that time and age. A more light Mask film was maybe the best choice to go. And we wouldn’t have Jim Carrey in it. I do also wanna say, I feel like The Mask series, you can do a lot of it. You can have something dark with it, or maybe more lighter.

There are still some of those darker elements. Mainly considering the moments with the gangsters and all that. But I will admit, learning that Charles mostly directed horror films. I think it’s impressive he made a more family friendly film and it worked. 

I liked it, despite my love for the comics. I thought when writing this, maybe some folks reading this may think I sound like fans who read the comics who first experienced this movie. But the film isn’t bad, it’s just a different take and a pretty nice one at that.

And to be honest, as much as I would of loved to see an actual sequel. And not that bad film known as Son Of The Mask. I understand why Jim Carrey dropped out, and I would’ve loved to see Peggy back because the director planned to bring her back reformed. But I feel like this film works as a one off in a way. And there’s also the cartoon, which works fine as a sequel despite some differences. Yet...I’ll admit, I would’ve loved The Mask 2 if we got Jim Carrey as Stanley again fighting against maybe someone like Walter.

The Mask 1994 is a good film. Despite changes from the source material, but the changes for this vision work. It’s cool this film has a cult following, and the fact I have used elements and story beats from it for The Mask Rebirth stuff I’ve been talking about. Even before watched this whole movie.

It’s a genuine fun flick. But I’m hoping down the line, if Warner Bros stops being fucking stupid with how they run things. Maybe we’ll get a reboot or how about an animated film that seems more true to the source material. 

I know The Mask/Big Head doesn’t have a big legacy such as the likes of Superman, Batman, and Spider-Man. But I do think this series could be reimagined and expanded upon. Using elements not only from the original comics, but even the movie and cartoon. 

And...despite it was because of Ace Ventura...I would like to thank @kaijuguy19 for being such a supportive dude, and talking about this franchise with me. Including wanting to talk about this movie long ago when I haven’t seen it. But I want to say...no...he’s one of the big reasons why I’m a fan. Because he’s one of the only guys I know who’s a fan. It started with Ace Ventura, but it was because of talking with Kaijuguy that I guess things started to escalate. So thanks man for talking about this stuff with me.

Also, Charlie was silly and he was fine as a character. I forgot about that dude despite wanting to talk about him. Gonna tag him too in case. Charlie schumaker

[bigskydreaming]

Interesting. Another week where I liked all the X-books that came out. Must’ve been cuz there was no Duggan in the mix.

New Mutants was one of the better issues since Ayala took over. I haven’t loved all of their issues, though enjoyed them for the most part, but this one I could really see everything start to come together that they’ve been seeding from their start. I wanna reread once next issue comes out and see whether it works better overall to read the full arc in one sitting. Also it might be that the Otherworld stuff was a forced detour they had to make and that threw off the pacing. We’ll see. 

But the kids with Gabby was such a sweet moment, and its so nice to see them all on the same side when it comes to Farouk......but Farouk’s motivations and the little interlude about the boy call back to Ayala’s first issue and it looks like the suspicions laid back then were true. Its almost certain that the Shadow King is actually an amalgamation or even just a full on puppet of an Amenthi demon who merged with or possessed Amahl Farouk as a child and using him as a host, has been all about trying to make this world match the one it came from, based on the same ideals Annihilation espoused. 

Basically, Amahl is not the same as the Shadow, the Shadow is trying to turn Krakoa into a new version of Arakko, and if I’m interpreting one panel of the art right, I think Xi’an (who seemed to have her suspicions back at the start of this arc too) just sensed another presence for the first time - and she’s the one who knows the Shadow King’s psyche best after all - and she’s figured out that there’s a separate Amahl Farouk consciousness hidden somewhere inside him. And given that second ‘demonstration’ interlude and the fact that the New Mutants are now nowhere to be found in the Shadow King’s mindscape, I’m guessing she managed to shunt them from the part the Shadow King controlled, into whatever part the original boy Amahl is hiding in.

Excalibur was one of its better issues. I’m far more interested in the politics of Otherworld than the political shit in X-Force, Mordred being a mutant is an actually interesting twist, and the idea that Arthur is making his son’s betrayal a self-fulfilling prophecy by attacking mutantkind because he believes Mordred will inevitably side with them as a mutant has some interesting possibilities. It was also unexpectedly....nice, to see like, the whole family Braddock fighting on the same side for probably the first time ever, lol, from Betsy to Brian to Meggan to Jamie.....Jim Jaspers remains a wildcard I’m wary of because like, lol I’ve read the original stories of him and it seems this writer has too, and I want someone to bring up that he’s keeping Redroot captive and make some kind of issue about that, especially now that Death has been brought back into the mix and Betsy’s offered to help him escape Sevalith. 

(Only to have him say no, he’s working - lol anyone else think Death’s trying to pull off a one-man coup and take over Sevalith for mutantkind and do his Daddy Dearest proud? Or given that he’s obviously still crushing on Ororo, even after - well I mean, probably BECAUSE she kicked his ass and left him for dead.....I could TOTALLY see them playing this as like, part of some weird courtship attempt of his. The only way he feels he can woo her as an equal is to come to her with a kingdom of his own or some shit like that. Idk, we’ll see. He’s definitely up to something though, but I do believe him when he says that ultimately he’s on the same side as the rest of them).

I liked that they haven’t forgotten about the other Rogue, Gambit and Rictor Captains, I liked Roma’s conversation with Jubilee about Shogo and the foreshadowing there, as well as Jubilee’s response and her clear conflict.....Merlyn can fucking die in a fire already, please and thank you, ugh, enough with this old shithead.....oh I LOVED that someone is FINALLY doing something with Bei, and it does make sense for it to be Excalibur though I figured it would’ve happened in New Mutants by now. But she and Shatterstar make a fun odd duo, and actually Star’s comment to Brian about being a new friend too like, lol, okay, I’m kinda here for a trio of Brian, Star and Bei to be like a Krakoan Warrior Three who are all united by their perspective as like, lifelong combatants and being outsiders among the rest of Krakoa even if Shatterstar and Bei are technically still mutants too. It makes sense.

Hmm, what else. Would love to see Bei’s thoughts on Death and Redroot, all things considered, and have something to do with those plotlines in the future. And really in general I’m here for this big all-kingdom smackdown with Sevalith, Hothive, Mercador, the Furies and Merlyn’s kingdom all arrayed against Krakoa and Avalon. Of course, these are still only the Foul Kingdoms. Roma and the rest of the Fair Kingdoms so far don’t seem to have any real problem with witchbreed....but this arc is still only getting started. Still waiting for Mordred’s inevitable entrance....curious to see what his power is, and especially if HE even knew he was a mutant before now.

Also: JULIO AND SHATTERSTAR CUDDLES. WE HAVE WAITED 84 YEARS FOR THIS.

And as for Hellions....

Okay, I didn’t actually love Hellions, its kinda on...layaway. I liked a lot of the fallout of last issue, I liked that the stakes are so apparent here, but I’m gonna be bothered by a lot of stuff unless there’s some kind of plot twist that reveals that Kwannon’s daughter is still alive somehow. Like maybe Sinister lied about not having another back-up JUST to ensure he still had one last card to bargain with up his sleeve since he lost the ‘in’ he had with the Hellions now, and with the Council now aware of his secret experiments with Arraki DNA (and bringing Tarn down on their heads in a way that COULD have started a full on war with them if Ororo hadn’t handled it for them)....like point is, all eyes are going to be on him for awhile now and he has very few cards left to play or people in his corner, so I’m HOPING that there’s another plot twist coming in the last couple issues there. 

Because if Kwannon’s daughter is ACTUALLY dead....it really doesn’t sit well with me that the first real mutant death in an age of literal immortality for the rest of them (since even Gorgon and Rockslide technically are still alive in SOME sense)....like for that to be Kwannon’s daughter, the only real innocent in all of this, and having been held hostage to this storyline the whole time, and only existing to force Kwannon’s hand in all of this....yeah. No. Thank you, do not like, that better not be all there is to this. I never trust anything Sinister says as a general rule, so I’m not gonna believe him about that having been the only back-up of her daughter until its wholly proven otherwise.

Other thoughts.....I like that Emma knows that she fucked up, I like that Emma DID have her own kinda failsafe in place because she didn’t trust Sinister for shit, I like that she was RIGHT not to trust Sinister for shit and that her fail-safe stopped even worse shit from happening....I DON’T like that her fail-safe literally just made Alex a weapon of mass destruction with no awareness he even was one and someone else’s hand (let alone fucking MANUEL’S on the trigger)....I DON’T like Emma looking all pained at how devastated Alex is when that was the inevitably outcome of this particular failsafe, like sorry Emma but if what it did to Alex was really that big a problem for you, you should have found a different failsafe.....and I REALLY REALLY don’t like Emma effectively just offering up Maddy’s resurrection as essentially a bribe to ‘fix’ what had happened to HIM, like....if you guys could have made the case for Maddy’s resurrection before now, it should have been for Maddy’s sake, not as like....a cheer-up tactic for fucking Alex, and DEFINITELY not to ‘fix’ a mess that still resulted in Kwannon’s daughter’s death (unless of course there’s a twist there).

Oh and I also meant to say there BETTER be fallout once Scott discovers Emma and Manuel’s role in all of this. I could definitely see Scott like, interceding on John’s behalf if he manages to pull of killing Empath, because like....he’d kinda want to do it himself. This is one of those times where I REALLY wish they’d spend more time developing where Gabe fits in with the Summers brothers now, relationship wise, because like, just show him giving any kind of shits for Alex as his older brother like, at all, and you can EASILY justify Gabe going full wrath-of-omega-mutant on Empath, and what’s the Council gonna do to one of their prized omega mutants, especially one who’s already been imprisoned on Krakoa for Xavier’s mistakes in decades past? 

Actually damn, now THERE’S a consequence-arc I’d love to see, because imagine Gabe helping John go after Empath, and then the Council really trying to throw HIM in the Hole for that, and then Scott being like uh no, remember the events of Deadly Genesis? The fuck I’m gonna stand by and allow that, Xavier you still owe him for that shit, especially since this resurrected version of him never did all the shit Emperor Vulcan did, at least as far as he knows. Or THEN ALSO I could see him getting Storm to back him up on this and she gets the Arraki to be like, well we owe this mutant a debt of gratitude for his role in making our new home, and actually his actions sound totally acceptable, we’re honestly not sure what the problem is, actually he sounds more like us than you so we’re happy to offer him sanctuary, and then the Council would shit their pants because they don’t want to lose an omega mutant to their war-like cousins since you KNOW more than a few of them are making contingencies in case they ever have to fight them again, and like, it’d split the loyalties of the entire Summers Clan in doubt and just...tons of story possibilities there. Lots to consider.

Eh, that’s not where they’re going with this at all though, so whatever. I’ll actually be really surprised if they do end up writing John as managing to successfully kill Empath.

Last thoughts.....this was weirdly the first time they EVER made me give a crap about Nanny? They managed to make me more interested in her in one issue than they have in her previous thirty-five years of existence, gave her more DEVELOPMENT in one issue than in all of that time, and when she was willing to sacrifice her just to save the orphanage from being destroyed I was like, holy shit. I....like...her?

And then they fucking ruined it all the very next page with how they had her react to Peter, and their ominous as fuck final epitaph. I’ll wait on deciding my full thoughts and feelings about that, and see just WHAT Peter ends up doing as a result....I have a feeling things are not going to end well for him and we might be close to seeing the last of him, especially with the inferences they’ve made about how destructive Peter’s true power is - whatever the hell it actually is. Like, Peter, at least, I can see the Council being more than willing to leave in the Hole, or just....put at the back of the resurrection queue for the rest of eternity. Which is shitty but would be perfectly in keeping with them and also I don’t actually know what he’s going to do yet.....like, is it going to be some bullshit like HE tries to destroy the Nursery or some shit because Nanny wanted to save it, or more likely is it gonna be something like he goes to the Right and betrays Krakoa or whatever and gives them valuable intel or something like that? Idk. 

Finally - YES MADDY’S COMING BACK. And she’s gonna be pisssssssed. Like, I don’t see how they’re planning to approach that, like....I’m expecting Xavier to try some serious editing on her back-up to maneuver WHICH point in time Maddy will come back remembering up to, because uh....that’s gonna matter a lot. But since this is all happening against his objections in the first place, and this seems more like Emma’s personal crusade to try and make up for her part in all this, I wouldn’t be surprised if Maddy comes back with full memories up to her most recent back-up.....which means she’s going to still be full on hating all of them, being like FUCK Krakoa AND your amnesty for all mutants I just want you all to burn, and oh yeah, on TOP of all that its inevitable she’s going to find out how much some of them FOUGHT to keep her from being resurrected, like....? Oh there is like only a 1 or 2% chance this ends any way other than TERRIBLY for everyone concerned.

(And yet I still hope they pull it off, because I don’t want her back just for one or two more issues, I want her back longterm. Ideally, I’d love her to take Jean’s place on the Council and pull it off with the support of like Mystique and Emma and Destiny and others as a giant fuck you to Xavier, but I’d also settle for her ditching Krakoa for Arakko and being like these are more my kinda people and also you can’t do shit to me here).

Oh and PS - lolololololol forever at Hank fucking McCoy trying to give Emma shit for her actions here. Like I mean, at least he’s AWARE he has literally no leg to stand on, whatsoever? I mean, I guess there’s that? But still. LMFAO OMG SHUT UP HANK YOU LITERALLY DON’T GET TO SAY SHIT ABOUT ANYONE ELSE BEING SHADY EVER.

Edit: Oh and also I forgot - I need to know how MUCH the Council found out about Sinister’s experiments, in particular if they found out he was ALREADY experimenting with making chimera mutants, like way ahead of schedule according to Moira’s LAST life in Powers of X, when like, the chimera mutants were a recent development as of a full hundred years in the future from now. Like, that changes a LOT and I would love to know what Xavier, Moira and Magneto think of that accelerated timetable and how it might change things.

[arch-venus25]

The Head and the Heart, Part 1

Hello everyone,

I am submitting this for @just-the-hiddles‘s The Damnit Jim, I’m A Vampire, Not A Landlord Fic Frenzy. I chose prompt “1....You can pay your rent in money or in blood.” I was inspired by all the prompts and will probably use them throughout the series. Basically I use the prompts as guide-lines.

This is the first time I have written and shared a fic online-- or ever really! It’s also the first time I’ve written anything modern so please let me know what you think! I hope I’m posting this correctly--I created the title art--LOL I’ve never done this before. I’m aiming to update the series each Tuesday. So here we go... 

Series Masterlist: The Head and The Heart

Summary: The twins are taking a night off from their graduate studies-- or at least Tessa is; her twin sister, Antha, is just trying to keep her out of trouble. What starts as a night of good old-fashioned fun and flirting quickly changes as they find themselves at the doorstep of the Hollow House Bed and Breakfast.

Characters: OFCs Antha and Tessa King, original characters/vampires

WARNINGS: 18+ for suggestive themes and violence, cursing, implied drug use, implied rape, stressful/scary situations, vampires, and characters with incredible hair-- you’ve been warned. Read at your own discretion.

Word Count: 2770

Part One: Faced with Foolishness

         “Well, you know Tessa, she’s being Tessa,” Antha murmured into her phone as she watched her twin sister cozy up to her flavor of the month; Tessa flipped her box braids off her shoulder, the beaded ends flirtatiously tinkling against every surface they met. As if watching a photo negative version of herself, Antha mourned her nonexistent reputation. Had she not spent years hiding in her books she may have been able to rival her uninhibited doppelganger in white hot-pants.

        “Why do you let her do this to you? It never goes as planned, and next thing you know I’ll be cleaning you two up and feeding you McDonald’s at two thirty in the morning!” She didn’t need facetime to picture Doug wincing through the phone, pushing his Buddy Holly styled Ray-Bans up the bridge of his nose.

        “So what you’re saying is how could I let Tessa do this to you?” She laughed, rolling her Havana twists through her fingers to fight off the June humidity. Talking to her best friend helped her forget just how long she had been holding it in line to the bathroom.

         “Ant, look I don’t like that bar—you want me to come get you?”

         “And leave her? I can’t do that—listen, if we don’t call you for a ride home by midnight just come get us. I’m exhausted and I don’t think she will party that long. Besides, you-know-who just showed up.” She watched as Franco the Flake appeared, wasting no time to linger over her sister—Tessa’s flavor of the month, forgotten within an instant. Antha’s eyes rolled like marbles as she turned away to better hear her friend on the phone; some fraternity boys nearby began fist-pumping into the air as the bartender served up a line of shots for them.

         “Ugh, the Flake… well I can hear things are getting started on your end—I’ll keep my phone on me, just don’t drive. Leave her car and I’ll get you two—there’s maniacs out there especially on Friday night.” He warned.

        “I owe you,” she groaned and hung up. Antha finally arrived in the ladies’ room, only two women away from her sweet release. She watched as the women cornered the mirror like crazed wanton things, bending and zhuzhing, adjusting their “girls” to their perkiest potential through scantily low apparel.

        “Heeeyy…” She quietly greeted the woman that exited the nearest stall. The stranger gave her a haughty elevator eye from head to toe making her feel severely underdressed for a Friday night out. When she threw on a sun dress today, she never anticipated her sister would abduct her after class and have them gallivanting across town. Tessa’s exact words were “Godamnit Ant, tonight we’re gonna have fun if it kills us!” A Cheshire Cat grin spread across her face as she floored the accelerator of her Neon, then cranked up the bass as the radio station started their basement remixes. Fun if it kills us.

        Antha stared at her white sandals, her nail polish was chipped and at least three weeks old. Then she looked to her messenger bag hanging on the back of the door. It was covered in Community College film badges and club stickers, per her friend’s preferences. Antha liked her graffitied messenger bag. Like a billboard, it made her appear she had a life outside of her graduate studies.

        She should have been at home, text books spread on her lap, feet up. She could hear Doug’s old Buick coughing its way up Momma’s drive, then fumbling outside the door, trying to knock with a third of Popov, case of Dogfish Head, and pizza in his arms. Then he would throw everything on the coffee table and announce “I brought Casablanca!” to which she would say “Oh, more white people movies?” and unphased, he would reply “Good god woman, it’s not Birth of a Nation!” Antha smiled, thinking of their weekly ritual of pretending to do research while gossiping long into the night until Zoey and Tessa would drunkenly Uber home. The distinct shamble, like the walking dead, would scrape up the gravel drive signaling their arrival.

        “Hey, you almost done in there?” An annoyed voice yelled over the door, cutting through her reminiscing. Antha could see the reds of the stranger’s eyes between the door crack.

         Instead of lounging on the couch surrounded by good beer and even better friends, Antha found herself being hustled by some Fireball-turned-up twat—all under the guise of having fun. “Yeah, sorry about that.” She replied and flushed. She tightened the belt holding in the billowy fabric of her flowy, mid-thigh, sunflower-printed sundress. It was passed down from her grandmother to her mother and so on. Looking like she walked off the set of a 90’s music video, she admitted that at least she was cooler than the other girls sweating in their skin-tight jeans and heels.

        Some pretty young thing burst through the door past the line and vomited into the trash bin next to Antha while she washed her hands. It was only nine o’clock. That was a bad omen. When she caught her reflection in the mirror, she realized she pouted just like Momma in those sorts of situations. She dampened a paper towel for the poor thing and could hear her mother’s words repeating in her head: “When you’re faced with foolishness—you take care of it.” Her mantra: Take care of it. Antha’s mantra: Do what Momma says. Tessa’s mantra: If it ain’t fun don’t do it.

        Antha applied her vanilla lip gloss as she thought on her mother. She made a promise as Momma was lowered in the ground that they would graduate. It was her dying wish that the twins became modern women with college degrees and to have options; to escape the laboring of farming and perhaps even the rinse and repeat of corporate Delaware. That’s all there was in their state: Farming or banking.

        She tucked her shoulder-length braids behind her ears; she truly missed her dreadlocks, but ever since the time Tessa’s boyfriend mistook her for his girlfriend, she cut them off. She was always the one to compromise. Not tonight she decided. Tonight was going to go her way. They would wrap up this foolishness by midnight.

        Antha sighed and knew it was time to face the havoc of the bar when a chatty patron pawed at her sundress asking if it was “vintage”. She replied, “Well it’s old as hell if that’s what you mean,” and hurried out the ladies’ room into the sweltering cacophony of nightlife.

        Fighting across sticky tile and sweaty rednecks she made a beeline for the bartender. “Mar, can I get two?” She bounced on her tip-toes to cut through the crowd huddled around the length of the tacky wooden bar. Maria motioned to the other side because she couldn’t reach through. Antha continued to fight her way through the herd. She could barely hear over the din of the 2016 campaign commercials and sportscasting when Maria slid two cocktails toward her. The southern comfort and coke cocktails reeked with vanilla syrup, Tessa’s favorite. Antha stared into the melting rail drinks and realized she didn’t know what to order herself because she was always the water-boy for her twin.

        “Hey, did you see what’s-his-face is in town?” Maria interrupted her thoughts.

        “Sure did.” She groused and tilted her head in the general direction of where she saw Tessa and Franco last. Through the bodies, for a moment, the crowd parted and the two stared.

        Stepping back from her esteemed role as the older sister, by barely two minutes, Antha admitted to herself that Tessa always looked good. Her off-the-shoulder top exposed a flawless ebony collarbone, shoulder blades, and arms. As if she was the Queen of Sheba incarnate, her tiny wrists were decorated with gold bangles. Her earrings matched the beads in her hair, reflecting light in her hazel eyes. A waterfall of thick box braids fell down her back and over her shoulders, past the tops of her thighs. Her years of dance complimented the country-chic white cut-offs that revealed just a hint of under cheek when she bent across the billiard table.

        “If I were a man, I’d pray for her to bite my head off quick and painless.” Maria laughed, her ponytail frizzing from the heat of her work; her hands rapidly dipping then shining high ball glasses.

        “But that’s not her style.” Antha replied wryly.

        “You’re both good girls. Now you keep her out of as much trouble as you can—I’ll send Kyle ‘round to your table with beers, just let me catch up here!”

        Maria was right: they were good girls. All of Tessa’s shenanigans aside, she never forgot cake for a birthday and with everyone’s break-ups she always had a bottle of Jack stashed with a shoulder to cry on. Tessa was the one that painted Antha’s nails and always lent her the best outfits when the event called for it. On occasion she was even known to deliver soup when her sister ran a fever.

        Tessa was the heart of the operation and Antha couldn’t begrudge her just because she was the head.

        For better or worse, they were sisters.

        Antha reluctantly clutched the chilled drinks and felt a pang of relief in the sweltering bar. She couldn’t see her sister at the billiard table with the onslaught of shuffling patrons, so she decided to move toward her booth. She narrowly missed being covered in appletini as the DJ scratched in one more summer top ten into his rotation. Before she could move forward a voice pinned her in place.

        “Your sister’s the worst, you know that?” A nice-looking guy glared at her. His teeth gleamed pink in the red bar lights. Antha bet he had a handsome smile on account of those white teeth, but he was not smiling now. She squinted through the hazy dance floor and recognized him as the guy Tessa arrived with before Franco appeared.

         “Hey John, don’t fret, Tessa’s just catching up with an old friend—he comes into town every so often, don’t get upset.” She yelled back at his face as kindly as she could manage over the blare of the oncoming band tuning their instruments. For some reason he didn’t seem to believe her and his chest instinctively puffed up.

        “John? I’m José!” He replied. Antha felt embarrassed for both her sister and herself. She grimaced unintentionally, realizing she had said it all with very few words.

        She tried to defend their position with a weak excuse. “José, I’m bad with names and faces—” but he stormed off before she could piecemeal a string of bullshit. There goes another Mr. Last Month.

        This was having fun. Antha doing damage control on last month’s flame, while Tessa stoked a new one. All of the nice memories of her sister evaporated in the heat of the interaction. She grumbled to herself, as she had grown tired of babysitting, not just Tessa but the men-children she dated. When she finally confirmed her party’s booth, she parted the shadowy sea of basic bitches.

        Tessa was giggling like a school girl when her sister dropped the sweaty glasses onto the ratty old table. Franco at her neck like a leech. I hate this guy, Antha thought to herself. He turned his hot gaze on her, “Hi Antha, didn’t see you there.” His drawl was thick like humidity. She thought about giving her drink to Tessa’s date, but now that she could see he was it, she plopped down and selfishly sipped one of the nasty cocktails without offering the second.

        “Oh hey Brian,” she said playfully, “where’s your camera?”

        “Ant, now you know this is Franco, stop playin’!” Tessa tore her eyes away from him for a split second, but after she threw her daggers she was back ogling him like a dog does a bone.

        “Sorry, it’s hard to keep all these blue-eyed, blond, gentlemen straight.” Antha marginally resisted saying yokel under her breath.

        Tessa had a type. Beyond all logic, light eyes were the buckle in her knee, the hitch in her breath; and Franco was at the top of her list. Antha assumed he was the Porsche in her garage amongst a long list of Ford’s, but she honestly didn’t know the whole story. All she knew was that Franco showed his face sparingly and only after dark. He would disappear for weeks at a time, which earned him the endearment The Flake.

        Now, Antha hadn’t dated enough men in her young life to sort them by color and size, but Tessa had. To her credit, her tastes were diverse, she did her research and knew what she liked. No one blamed her either. With that hair and those legs, Tessa could have anyone she wanted. The great appeal of Franco didn’t add up to Antha though. She found him suspicious. She thought his truck was too loud, his jeans too torn, and his eyes much too heavy.

        Franco made idle conversation, inquiring after the twins’ classes as if he cared. His blond, three-quarter parted hair was glossy under the dim lights. When he pulled his tooth pick from the back of his ear and chewed on it, it made him look like an old-fashioned mobster—well until that Delmar twang spilled out of his hillbilly mouth. There was an allure about him; all of his parts matched, but his smile unglued those pieces. A smile that never quite reached his eyes.

        Antha found herself sizing him up, drinking the disgusting cocktail faster than she wanted. I bet he has plastic zip ties and rope in his truck bed, she thought. She didn’t truly know why the image popped into her mind, it was just a feeling she got when his eyes were on her; made her feel like a snack, as if he would eat her alive right where she sat. No more Unsolved Mysteries for me this week, she insisted to herself.

        “Mmmm-hmmm.” Was the best response she could offer when he spoke to her directly. Tessa continued chatted about her business management courses as he deeply stared at her. Antha figured there was no real room for her in the conversation so she took out her world cultures text and flipped to her last page. She liked hanging out, however her final thesis was demanding all of her energy. The page fell open to vampires in the section of Egyptian mythology. She thought how ironic as her eyes shot up at the man sitting across from her.

        “So, there’s this bonfire by Slaughter Bay, I thought you ladies could come with.” Franco suggested lazily like it was too exclusive to be excited about. “You can shotgun babe and we can put Antha and her friends in back.” He eyed the textbooks growing damp on the table. Antha finished the first SoCo and started the second just to cope with him. “You could call up the girls.”

        “Zoey… Zoey... Zoey!” Tessa dramatically said into her drink and then laughed. Antha couldn’t help but smirk as Tessa explained to him her girlfriend was like Candyman and could be summoned via a pint of beer. The joke was partially lost on Franco.

        Before Tessa could agree to go Antha piped up, a little less shy now that her liquid courage had kicked in. “Sounds awfully romantic, but we can’t.” Before she could continue she was interrupted.

        “Hey girl haaayyyy!” Zoey appeared as if out of thin air and snatched one of the beers sent over by the bartender. “You goin’ nowhere without me—not after I Ubered across town!” Her two rando friends hollering and sloshing their drinks.

        “How the hell do you do that?” Antha insisted, amazed that their friend appeared.

        “Uhhhh, never you mind—we can make bonfire plans later—its ten o’clock, I’m here and Bieber is playing! GET UP!” Zoey declared, the glitter from her eyes dusting every surface.

        “Keep an eye on my friends.” Antha told Franco as she abandoned her books to be dragged to the floor. This was the moment she decided she was getting them all out of there; she didn’t like the sound of a bonfire with him and she certainly wasn’t allowing Tessa to go on her own either. She sent a pre-written text message to Doug: “Get here.” Which was their code for its really going down, I need back up.

Twinning Taglist: If you want to be added or removed just let me know; please share with anyone that might be interested. I would love any and all feedback so I can learn and become a better writer. Thank you!  I tagged some people that I thought would be interested in this. @myoxisbroken @just-the-hiddles @vodka-and-some-sass @nildespirandum @yespolkadotkitty @latent-thoughts @emeraldrosequartz @villainousshakespeare @hopelessromanticspoonie @caffiend-queen @poetic-fiasco @lokimostly @dianamolloy @marvelgirlonamarvelworld @brightsunanddarkmidnight2-0 @cateyes315 @mooncat163 @nuggsmum @plastic-heart @myraiswack @wolfpawn​

[danakin-skywalker]

ho ho ho health legend!!

i hope that you had a great day and that your feet werent too sore to get out of bed and enjoy this lovely monday, december 13th! bc 33 flights?! im out bestie good for you tho

of course! i had like 7 different pixie hollow accounts because i would forget my login info every time🤦🏼‍♀️ and my nana was the only one with a computer, so until she made designated notebooks for my cousins and i, we just had random mixed up printer papers of passwords😂😂 im ashamed to admit i was never able to figure out club penguin so i couldnt play🧍🏼‍♀️

THE BANANNY WAGNER MEMES GOT ME !!!!!! i cant lie, i sent those to like six people they were so good. also, sweater danny🥺 but all the pics you were so pretty. i saw someone say today that he was sculpted like a greek god and i cant help but agree, sheesh!

im afraid today im back again with some basic questions ive somehow skipped over...

1. what other artists/genres do you listen to?

2. what is you favorite color?

3. how would you describe your personal style?

4. what are your sun, moon, & rising placements?

5. can you play any instruments?

6. do/did you play any sports?

7. what is one hidden talent you have?

remember santa loves u - and that youve brightened my month as well! but soon ill be able to just ask you anything, anytime once my true identity is revealed👀

🎅🏼

#26

Good morning Santa!!!!! I did manage to get out of bed yesterday but I’m sure by tomorrow I’ll be bed-ridden again because today I have to go get my Covid booster, which I hear can be tough on the body.

I love the idea of your nana just keeping track of every grandkid’s login information for whatever site they happened to use. I’m also really glad you got as much of a kick out of bananny Wagner as I did bc I thought I was gonna piss myself laughing when I first found it.

So recently, I’ve been listening to a lot of artists suggested/recommended by the boys, and other artists I find from those artists. For example, I’ve been listening to a lot of Hozier, Stephen Stills (more often CSN&Y), and Jim Croce, and a lot of classic rock like Quiet Riot, Van Halen and Styx. I’ve been really having fun delving into music that has been well loved for years that I’m unfamiliar with. With the exception of Hozier and Greta I’m really not listening to a lot of modern music at the moment, which has been really cool since moving to a major city, kind of feels like a juxtaposition to listen to John Denver while staring at the manhattan skyline you know?

My two favorite colors are purple and green, but I really only like the very light shades or very dark shades of both colors. Like the pastels and the jewel tones. I’m not into the generic “this is green” green, do you know what I mean?

My personal style is tricky because I’m not spending a ton of time lately outside of my apartment, so right now my style is just comfortable and cozy loungewear. I suppose I haven’t really developed a personal style yet, I never know what to say for questions like this. I’m really more of a simple dresser, I like staple pieces I can wear a bunch of different ways. But the problem with that is I can never personally justify buying high quality staple pieces that can withstand wear. So long story short, I’m workin on it.

I am the most absolute textbook cancer sign you’ll ever meet. Like the logical part of my brain doesn’t want to believe in astrology, but I’m just such a fucking cancer that it’s hard to really discount it. Both my moon and rising signs are in Aquarius, and I actually have had a lot of Aquarius friends in the past.

Okay, let me walk you through my personal instrument timeline. So when I was really little (like under 10) my mom had my brother and I in piano and violin lessons. But then I’m pretty sure by the time we were 10 those stopped (to be fair, that was around when the recession hit). Then I learned recorder in elementary school like everybody else and when it came time to sign up for band and pick an instrument, I chose clarinet because it was similar to recorder. Then I played clarinet in band for four years, I even played bass clarinet for a year because the school had one and you really play it the same as a normal clarinet it’s just bigger and jankier.

Around this time I also decided I wanted to learn bass guitar. I distinctly remember not wanting to learn guitar because in my head basically everyone knew how to play guitar and I wanted to be ~different~ so I borrowed a bass and a beginners book from the school. My dad was ecstatic, it was then that I learned he used to play bass in college (when was he gonna tell me that if I never independently showed interest? The world may never know). BUT what happened was I came home one weekend from a Girl Scout camping trip and my mom had randomly bought me an acoustic guitar. She said she assumed that was what I really wanted to play but I think she did it because 1) she has a heart condition that gets really bothered by bass notes and 2) full disclosure my dad didn’t have the healthiest relationship in alcohol back in the day and I’m sure she thinks this relates to the kind of world a bass player would be in.

Regardless, I was pressured to switch to guitar. And I hated it. There was something about the strings on the guitar she got me that made them terrible for beginners, even the guy I was getting lessons from told me to get it re-stringed. I had to press down so hard for any noise to come out that it made it really difficult to switch chords. And then I gave up when I found out nearly every song I wanted to learn to play has a barre chord in it. My fingers were just NOT callousing and I didn’t like how everybody in the world it seemed could hear me when I was trying to practice. Sometimes I wonder if I had kept with the bass if I would’ve gotten good at it, I made a lot more progress a lot more quickly than I did with guitar. But alas.

I mentioned skiing before, but the only sport I kept with through high school was Track & Field. I was a thrower, my events were shotput and discus. I wasn’t particularly great at it, but I wasn’t doing it to be the best on the team. The track and field team was like a massive family, it consisted of roughly the same group that jumped together from Cross Country Running to Nordic Skiing to Track, with the same coach running all three. I absolutely hate running, especially the way they do it, so track was really the only one I could stick with. But the vibes were unmatched I miss that squad.

Okay this question stopped me for a second. A hidden talent? I’m just gonna list of random things I’m good at. Like I said, I have camp counselor experience, so if you know what boondoggle is I’m a master at that (including and especially starting them off). I’m also pretty good at joint rolling but only the ~cool people~ get to find that out when they see it in action. I’m not sure if this counts but I’m also really good at memorizing lyrics. Pretty much every song I like I know most of the words to, if not all. Even if I haven’t heard a song in like a decade, if I learned the words once at some point in my life they will come running back to me.

I love you Santa I can’t wait until after Christmas when I’m DMing you excitedly every time I get a new record. I hope your Jacob Thomas Tuesday goes smoothly friend.

[punkscowardschampions]

Libi & Bobby

Libi: Guess what I’ve just seen

Bobby: ?

Libi: Had art first lesson

Libi: Look what was on the noticeboard when I got out

Libi: [Audition sign-up list]

Libi: !!!

Bobby: You haven’t written our names down yet

Libi: 😃😃 yeah?

Libi: The premise sounds interesting

Libi: not the worst; remember that Cinderella knock-off they did when I first started? That was REAL cringey

Bobby: There’s loads of people I’d fake kill, none I’d stay out til midnight 💃🕺 with

Libi: Maybe the ‘glass’ slippers are still in the cupboard

Libi: you can make it your diva request

Libi: you really FEEL your character would wear shoes made out of sellotape in every scene

Bobby: sticking to the floor might make me a bit easy to catch ❌🏃🏻🚔🚨

Bobby: I’ll probably save them to wear backstage

Libi: Power move

Libi: In English now, but I’ll go have a loo break and sign us up

Libi: There were only a few names already on there

Bobby: Hang on, is there anyone signed up that’ll put me off? You left that off the pic

Libi: Signing up doesn’t necessarily mean they’ll get a part

Bobby: yeah but

Bobby: whose name are you deliberately not saying

Libi: China must’ve had music, she would’ve passed by it too

Bobby: She’ll only be after the lead

Bobby: be alright when you get it, we won’t see no sign of her

Libi: There’s the 😇/😈 leads though

Libi: Which one do you think Jake will like? OMG! 🙄

Bobby: 😈🤘🎸 DUH

Libi: She already thinks she’s a femme fatale in her day-to-day

Libi: I hope someone else gets it, she’ll be seething

Libi: Mean but can you imagine?

Libi: She’d be unbearable

Bobby: You heard me say you will, unless you’re seriously gonna just audition for 😇

Libi: You think I could pull that off?

Libi: I’ll take any role I suit

Bobby: I think you’d suit a one-woman show but sir bothered to 💭 up all those roles now so it’d be a bit rude

Libi: You overestimate my abilities 😚

Libi: but it is encouraging

Libi: I think it could be really cool if you were the 😈 guy if I WERE to be the 😈 girl, because we could basically secretly communicate and no one would clock it was us ‘til the end and it’d be such a good reveal that we were signing in plain sight, you know?

Bobby: You underestimate yourself, that’s such a top idea, for 1.

Bobby: I was still trying to work out how to audition nevermind how they’d sort it if I got given the role

Bobby: 🏆🥇🎬

Bobby: Gutted you’re not directing it and all for 2.

Libi: You didn’t think I was going to volunteer us without a solid idea, did you?

Libi: Work on your brooding cold stare, Bobs 😝

Libi: I think they film it, but I also think Mr Mullan sets up a static tripod at the back of the hall and if anyone’s ma or da gets up the ‘shot’ is ruined 😷

Bobby: I never thought you wouldn’t get there, Libs, just wasn’t expecting it that fast

Bobby: I’ll stick on Clockwork Orange and The Shining and Voila! 👍

Bobby: Yeah? Didn’t have Mr M down as such an amateur

Libi: 🏃‍♀️

Libi: Oh, we have to have movie night

Libi: let Jim and Jan know it’s basically homework 🤞

Libi: Makes sense to get ahead of the competition

Libi: You’re free, right?

Bobby: If I wasn’t I’d be cancelling plans

Libi: I’d question who I was talking to if not

Bobby: 💔 if I’d been hacked and it took you this long to work it out

Libi: Never

Libi: not even in a bad teacher-written Agatha knock-off

Libi: too far fetched

Bobby: Sir sounds like he’s not above a 🔪 in the back murder if he’s still team tripod

Libi: I can’t wait to get out the corn syrup 😋

Libi: We can watch Scream even though it isn’t strictly genre

Bobby: Taxi Driver, The Godfather and Kill Bill too then for the 🥇🩸🏆

Libi: Now you’re talking

Libi: we might need a weekend marathon

Libi: now they’re boring adults, can’t pull all-nighters, even for 🥇🩸🏆

Bobby: maybe we can bribe them with back instead of front row seats

Bobby: not having to sit next to China’s mum could swing loads for us

Libi: Oh God

Libi: She LOVES to talk

Libi: and treat them like she’s known them since/they’re still kids

Bobby: I don’t wanna 🤞 that neither get roles, America’d probably be decent at the over the top stuff sir’s gonna want to make people laugh

Bobby: distance’ll have to do

Bobby: I’ll 🤞 instead that she don’t notice them sneaking in or out

Libi: She’ll for sure get a role, if she’s auditioning

Libi: Which I bet she will, the get-out-of-lessons-free pull is real for us all

Libi: She’ll be too busy making her own 📹 I reckon

Bobby: 🤔 How many lessons do you reckon we’ll end up missing?

Libi: The nearer the performance the more rehearsals they usually end up pulling for

Libi: But it’s Wednesday and Friday after school, so sometimes we get to miss last lesson on those days

Bobby: Alright, I’ll get over my 😳

Libi: You’ll be great

Libi: I wonder what other boys will audition

Libi: There’s never quite enough boys

Libi: What about Sean?

Bobby: I can’t imagine him learning lines

Bobby: Jake’s mates though, easy to 💭 of them trying to take over

Libi: Totally, every school event is a popularity contest as far as their egos are concerned

Libi: Some of them will think they’re too cool to even do it for a laugh but really it’s just 😳

Libi: As long as we have each other, it doesn’t matter

Bobby: It’ll be great, me and you, even if it takes me a sec longer to find my feet without sellotape 👠

Libi: 😚

Libi: It’ll be good to have a school thing we can actually do together

Libi: this school needs better clubs

Bobby: I bet he’ll let you start a 🎥📽🎞 club after the play

Bobby: when he’s 🤞🤩🤞 you’ll sign up for the next one

Libi: Okay I don’t know about that but that would be fun

Libi: even if it was just you and me again because no one else has seen a film that isn’t in Netflix’s catalogue 😆

Bobby: Even if it’s just us he’ll have a hard job ❌😒👎 when you’ve done such a good one

Libi: We’ll see 🤞

Libi: Usual spot at break then? I better go do some actual work now 😓

Bobby: 👀

Bobby: Me too, dunno who said there wasn’t any in transition year

Libi: They want to make it seem like there’s a break between exams, but as if they’re gonna let you get away with doing nothing

Libi: not got enough ideas to keep you busy 😏

Libi: Guess it is nice to have all that time to decide what to pick for next year but if you’ve already got a good idea… 🤷‍♀️

Bobby: Reckon if they could force everyone in the year towards that sign up sheet they would

Bobby: about as far as their ideas go

Bobby: good thing I can sort myself out

Libi: With a little help 🤏

Libi: I know my Grandma will help us out loads though, she’ll be buzzing about this

Bobby: Yeah 🤏 of work with Jim at his for a start

Bobby: when I’m not fake murdering people with you anyway

Bobby: he’ll be buzzing at the chance to art and craft again too 😏

Libi: Awh

Libi: Bet he’s missed school so much, like

Bobby: 😂

Libi: [Skip to day where they put the roles up]

Libi: I think I’m going to be late

Libi: If you want to walk to school without me

Bobby: I don’t mind waiting, not got loads on first thing

Libi: I can’t get my hair to do anything

Libi: stupid, I know

Bobby: I get it, you wanna look worthy of your starring role

Bobby: you’ve already earned it though

Libi: More like, I don’t want to look a total mess if I already made an idiot out of myself in auditions

Libi: China’s gloating will be insufferable enough without giving that satisfaction too

Bobby: I was there Libs, you didn’t

Bobby: China’ll be the one dreading the list and you can 😁 all you like

Libi: Lowkey feel like I’m gonna barf, this is ridiculous

Libi: and no one seems to know if they’ll put the list up break or lunch-time

Bobby: if you wanna stay home, I’ll keep lookout for it

Libi: No, I can’t do that

Libi: but thanks, I’ll only be 5 more minutes, max, promise

Bobby: enough time for me to make you a congrats card

Libi: Only if you make yourself one too

Libi: If I get a part, it’s only because of you, so you will too

Bobby: if I get a part it’s only because of you, more like

Bobby: and Jake’s mates messing up most of their lines

Libi: Okay, it’s not me admitting I was amazing to say some of them were awkwardly bad 😬

Libi: Thought Sir might start crying/have his nervous breakdown before we’d even started

Libi: Oh God what if one of us gets a role where we have to be all 😍 with one of that lot instead, that’ll be so… 😰

Bobby: I’d have to drop out of it before being 😍 with her

Bobby: save me from my own breakdown or her from a real murder

Libi: We can’t let you go that method, let the 🤩 go to your head

Bobby: You keep my head the right size, I’ll keep you from 🤮

Libi: Keep your hands clean of any real 🩸 it’s not that play

Libi: 🤐 on the name

Bobby: You don’t reckon I could play Scotish royalty? It’s not like I have to bother with the accent

Libi: ‘course you could

Libi: and she’d make an excellent witch

Libi: totally a compliment 😇

Libi: alright, I’m ready

Bobby: So’s your card

Bobby: If I was as 😇 as you, I’d have made her one saying sorry she missed out

Libi: no substitute for 🌹 at her feet, I feel

Libi: let’s 👀

Libi: [can skip again to after we actually know, ‘cos clearly that would be in person at school]

Bobby: [fuck that teacher for having a marvelous time ruining everything]

Libi: [could’ve been brave and taken that risk but nah, so rude]

Libi: hey

Libi: you awake?

Bobby: [at least IRL he could focus on being happy for her cos he is instead of having to pretend it’s fine when it’s not fine which she obvs would’ve seen through]

Bobby: You don’t need to keep worrying, you got the part over her and she’s still got one to keep her too busy if she fancies sabotage

Libi: I’m not worried

Libi: just bummed out, I suppose

Bobby: prospect of spending that much time with Jake’ll do that

Bobby: maybe China’ll bully him into quitting

Libi: he isn’t even her boyfriend

Libi: not that it matters, because it’s acting

Libi: I really thought he’d go for our idea

Bobby: I probably should’ve known he wouldn’t

Bobby: sorry for getting your hopes up, Libs

Libi: It’s not your fault

Libi: it feels kind of… wrong?

Libi: but not in a provable way, arguably he was better for the role and you still have one so

Libi: I don’t know

Libi: I’m sorry, are you alright?

Bobby: It’s not yours either, and yeah, maybe he was better

Bobby: face, and more importantly voice, fits

Bobby: we still get to hang out, that’s what’s alright by me

Libi: I don’t think he’s better

Libi: but yeah, that’s what it’s all about

Libi: and there’s plenty other people who got cast who are actually nice

Libi: we could do our own rehearsals separate to the regular ones, once a week or something, with those people, do some bonding

Libi: friday nights maybe? get takeout, watch a relevant movie or show, it doesn’t have to be all serious and 🤓

Bobby: Then I don’t care what sir thinks

Bobby: I’m in and Sean will be too, I don’t see why crew should be left out

Libi: 😊

Libi: Totally, whoever wants to come can

Libi: just think it’s fair to assume that they won’t wanna come any more than we’d really like them there

Bobby: What’s the first film or show gonna be?

Libi: That’s the question 🤔

Libi: [The relevant Poriot episodes] One of these, for sure, but how do you decide between a deadly murder mystery party and a deadly halloween party?!

Bobby: You were ready, have you been watching them both instead of 😴?

Libi: Maybe

Bobby: Your dreams are gonna be so on brand, let me know about it if you kill Jake

Libi: Bobby 😂

Libi: Imagine the look on her face if I was overheard dreaming about Jake

Bobby: 😡🤬🤯

Libi: Not trying too convince him it’s real, just the audience

Bobby: Neither of them need much convincing, they’re sure everyone’s 😍💘🌹 for them and their mate group

Libi: It’s so weird

Libi: How are they so unaware?

Bobby: I dunno but it don’t help now that sir has fuelled the 🔥

Libi: Yeah 🙄

Libi: Main characters of the School

Libi: must be nice to be so in 💘 with yourself

Bobby: You got a bit of their usual 👏🌹 today, what did you think?

Libi: I wouldn’t go that far

Libi: we all got parts

Libi: I don’t feel any different or better, that’d be weird

Bobby: 🤏 I said,‘cause I knew you wouldn’t

Bobby: but alright, I’m glad you’re still you

Libi: You thought I’d turn into a total diva? 🥺

Libi: how very rude 😏

Bobby: I’m just sulking ‘cause Mullan literally cast me as a mime, white gloves and all

Libi: Oh no

Libi: Can’t unsee 😬

Libi: but you’re gonna make it so much more than that

Libi: even if just to spite him, prove how 🔥 you can be without a voice

Bobby: and for the next play, unless it’s a musical or something even more 😬 than Cinderella

Libi: There’s the whole Disney catalogue to go through…

Libi: OMG

Bobby: Just don’t start dreaming of Jake as your prince charming

Libi: NO

Libi: LET ME STOP SHOUTING

Libi: but how cool would you as a boy Ariel be

Libi: unless you really want flowing long red hair

Bobby: BUT it’s such a fun throwback 🔊❕📢❗️

Bobby: 🤔💭?

Bobby: put it in the school suggestion box tomorrow in all CAPS

Libi: Hey! 😳

Libi: I was much younger and even more foolish back then

Libi: I’m reticent to give any more of my good ideas to Mr Mullan now

Bobby: yeah, what’s his excuse for being a poohead?

Libi: If we’re bringing up past embarrassments

Libi: I remember PLENTY too, FYI 😜

Libi: Honestly, I don’t know why J&J didn’t try harder to tell me to 🔉

Bobby: You’d never 😳 me when I’m down

Bobby: and you shouldn’t be 😳 for then, it was 🤝 not 👊

Bobby: your heart has always been massive and right where it should be

Libi: Backatcha Bobs 😊

Libi: Best friends for a reason

Bobby: Exactly, so you don’t have to worry

Bobby: we’ll have as much fun doing the play as we planned

Libi: That’s all I care about

Libi: well, I’d quite like to not shame myself and do a good job with this play

Libi: definitely 🥈 though

Bobby: Well that’s a given and all, didn’t you read your congrats card?

Bobby: I’ll have to get some real 🌹🌹 to chuck, you won’t be able to ignore them

Libi: Of course I did

Libi: but you’re my best friend, you HAVE to say all those things

Bobby: I’m a non-speaking character, saying it in spite of that

Bobby: must be important

Bobby: 🤏

Libi: I’ll stop worrying at full 🔊

Libi: It’ll be good

Libi: Do you think I should like, try to get together with Jake and Louie, get to know them and work out how to make our respective 💘s work?

Libi: I can’t think how to word it without sounding like I’m being thirsty

Bobby: *at any volume

Bobby: It will be good, I promise

Bobby: you could ask if they wanna run lines, see how they react, if they take it as you’re 😍💘🌹 1.’cause it’s them you’re expecting that and 2. it’s such a 😇🤓 request they’d be the ones who look 🤤

Libi: Ugh, how is that easy for you? 😎

Libi: That’s perfect

Libi: they signed up for the play too, they must wanna put some effort in too

Bobby: I wouldn’t go that far *😳

Bobby: It should work alright though, they bothered to learn their lines for the audition on top of signing up

Libi: Louie is alright

Libi: I’ll start with him

Libi: Lucie who’s playing the maid is cute

Bobby: He is, you’ll be alright

Libi: Don’t you think so?

Libi: She could be your 💘 and she can really beef up her role and be devastated when you get whacked

Bobby: I don’t mind her being 💔 if she wants but I don’t think I need a 💘

Libi: Married to the job

Libi: I see it

Bobby: There you go, it makes loads of sense

Libi: Plus Lord whatshisface might be being a rogue with her

Libi: that makes more sense

Bobby: 😂

Libi: Do you wanna go to the shops after school tomorrow? 👀 inspo even if we just window shop

Bobby: There’s loads of props I wanna have a go at making so I do need to have a look about to get them right

Bobby: it’s a date

Libi: I’ll wait on the 🌹🌹

Libi: Really should do some work for them first

Bobby: I can always put to 🖍 paper or fold you a paper one

Libi: Only if you colour it in [her favourite crayon colour name]

Bobby: [We’re obviously doing that as we watch these Agatha eps so prove of both those things in progress is gonna get sent]

Libi: 😇🤓 points x1000

Bobby: That’ll be why sir didn’t give me the 😈 role, if we asked

Libi: Hmm

Libi: He’s just failing to see your full potential but not for long

Libi: no one can ignore the talent

Bobby: He’s seen my potential for carrying a tray, might be as far as it goes for him

Bobby: least until my 🔈🧜‍♂️ starring role changes his mind

Libi: You are old enough to get that part-time job

Bobby: Imagine serving China and her mates ☕️ every day though

Bobby: not to disrespect the family trade but

Libi: 😅 I’m sure Jim would NEVER wish that on you

Libi: At least Asia was kinda nice, she could be anyway

Libi: Comparing her group to China’s now, feel like you’d be worse off

Bobby: he might wish the tips on me, but I reckon you’re right about it not being worth it

Libi: That’s true, it’s probably the best 💰💰 part-time

Libi: I want to get one, to help out, but I don’t know what I’ll do

Bobby: I’m gonna see if a proper job’ll come of going to work with him this year, even if that’s just doing ☕️ for everyone

Libi: That’d be ideal

Libi: I can totally see it happening, you’re enjoying it and they’re all impressed with you

Libi: 🤞🤞

Bobby: And we’ve got time to find a job for you 🎥📽🎞 that isn’t just scooping 🍿 into a carton

Libi: If I got to watch all the films for free

Libi: but that kind of slacking would make the whole job bit of it pointless 😅

Libi: We’ve got time

Libi: maybe I’ll be a maid

Libi: or a socialite, without the social-standing

Bobby: I bet [the name of a cinema that still plays films in an old school way] would train you as a projectionist

Libi: 😱

Libi: I can’t believe I’ve never thought about that

Libi: Do you think they would? That’d be-

Libi: -well 😍

Bobby: I’d put 💰💰 from my first wage on it

Bobby: you know loads of complicated stuff about 🎥📽🎞 already, I reckon they’d be 😁 to have you

Libi: I’ll take an IOU on a commission instead 🖼

Libi: 😘

Libi: Definitely going to look into it, I’ll have to see what hours they’d allow… nan and grandad might not be cool with the late shift a cinema allows for

Bobby: they might if J or J agree to pick you up

Bobby: but either way we’ve got a deal 🌹 not included

Libi: I could ask

Libi: but I don’t wanna put them out either

Libi: anyway, what am I even worrying about, it’s not like it’s happening yet, if at all 🤨🙄

Libi: Play hysteria is real

Bobby: by the time it is maybe you’ll let me pick you up 🚗

Libi: Maybe… 😱😜

Libi: Seems crazy you aren’t still 6 sometimes

Bobby: 😲!!!

Bobby: You must mean that I’m SO 🤴🗡🐲

Libi: Of course

Libi: You know I didn’t mean anything bad by it

Bobby: I 💭 you meant if we were still 6 we could do our own play with no adults telling us how

Libi: That is an 💭

Bobby: one that’s keeping us up

[a pause for realisation when she hasn’t replied that she’s fallen asleep lol]

Bobby: * me anyway 😂

Bobby: night Libs

[transxfiles]

A Roll Of The Dice by two_drama_nerds_in_a_boat | @homeworkforpigeons

Summary: Star Trek is an incredibly popular tabletop roleplaying game. Mostly gen with some Spirk at the end.

Word Count: 1822

Find this fic on AO3

Gliding through the stars would never get boring, he decided. Even at Warp Speed 9, with all the bright lights zipping past him so quickly they were nothing more than blurry spots in the sky, it was a simultaneously haunting and stunning sight. The Captain sighed, leaning back in his chair-

“Oh, do get on with it Jim,” muttered Hikaru from across the table, rolling dice between his fingers. “We don’t have all day.”

“But the monologues are important. For… character development.”

Nyota rolled her eyes. “Not when you spend an hour on them every turn. Besides, we already let you have the Captain’s Log thing. Now come on. I want to fight some hostile aliens.”

“Aren’t you supposed to stay on ship with Scotty in case things go wrong, Communications Officer?”

“Goddamit you two,” Bones said, fist slamming the table, sending papers fluttering and figurines toppling onto the board.  “We’ll never get anything done with the two of you fighting.”

“Come on Jim,” said Rand, shoving some dice into his hand. “Your. Turn.”

He looked at Spock, who just did that thing where he would raise only the one eyebrow, and sighed in defeat.

“Fine.”

He dropped the dice, watching them roll until they made their way a surprising distance from him, finally stopping by Scotty.

No one really knew how they’d all gotten together. Jim had to admit, they were an odd group.

In the end, they were all just sort of bored, and lonely, and they needed something to do after school. Originally, it had just been Jim and Bones. They took turns DMing, setting up short campaigns for the others to play, but it got incredibly boring very quickly. They got tired of it. They needed a permanent DM - so they’d found Spock, who, despite his attempt to put on mask of no emotion, seemed to take both happiness and pride in being Dungeon Master. And after that, everyone else had sort of fallen into place. Because once they had Spock, they at least a consistent location to play - his basement. Which, though still not ideal, was better than bouncing between Jim’s too-cramped (shared with his brother) bedroom and Bones’s tiny garden shed. So while Spock’s basement was a bit musty, it was honestly ideal, really, because though it was dark and sometimes damp, they made it their own. They had a little cooler with snacks and drinks it, and they’d put down a rug, and they had a little table, and every time a new person joined them they all went down to the local flea market as a group and helped pick out a chair for them, and ever so slowly the basement became theirs.

After Spock joined, Nyota was close behind him. She was new to their school that year, and she wanted friends, so she sought them out. She knew Spock through T’Pring, of course, and though Spock’s relationship with T’Pring was more than a bit strained, still, Nyota didn’t seem to mind. She wanted “Something amusing to do outside of school,” she’d said, something to “fill the time” and “make an afternoon more enjoyable.” A statement to which Jim had (nearly) replied with a few lewd, though somewhat humorous comments - though he did instead opt to stay quiet.  Somewhat due to Bones kicking him not-so-discreetly in the shin, telling him that “She won’t stay if you don’t play nice.”

And with Uhura came Rand, a new friend of hers, and with Rand came Chapel, a blonde girl Jim recognized from one of his science classes (he was taking a lot of those; it was one of the few things in school he actually enjoyed taking part in, and since he was on one of those advanced tracks, he was taking as many as possible) and it also drew a young Scottish kid, who was quickly nicknamed Scotty (because if you’re that goddam Scottish, James Tiberius Kirk is sure as hell going to give you some sort of nickname) and Scotty drew a kid named Hikaru, and Hikaru drew in the Russian exchange student, Pavel, and in some way or another, they managed to get together enough people to create a long-term campaign.

They named their ship the Enterprise, and decided on their mission: To explore strange new worlds. To seek out new life, and new civilizations. To boldly go where no one has gone before.

(That last bit used to be no man, but Nyota, Rand, and Chapel had all insisted that was at least a little bit sexist, and so they decided to change it to no one.)

The first time they’d all played a campaign on their own had resulted in some of the most fun Jim had in months. Spock DMed (of course) and they got to go down to a planet for shore leave and Scotty got with some prostitute (or planned to, at least) and then she was murdered and they all needed to work together to solve the mystery, and it turned out that the entity that had murdered the woman was actually Jack The Ripper (a reveal that had prompted many of them to ask Spock what exactly he was on when he wrote this) who was an immortal alien who basically ate fear.

“The crew of the Starship Enterprise is once more face to face with the hostile Klingons,” Spock said, hiding behind his notepad.

Jim grinned. “I walk past the Science Officer, our hands brushing as-”

“Oh shut up,” said Nyota, obviously suppressing a giggle. “You’ve tried to seduce him, what? Thirty times now?” She looked to Chekov. “How close am I?”

“Well, it’s a bit higher than the thirties,” he said. The bastard was reaching into his backpack for a notebook, no doubt to add another tally to some list he’d made for keeping score.

“I’m getting closer every time!” Jim said.

Spock raised an eyebrow in his direction. “Roll for charisma,” he sighed.

He did, tossing the die across the table. And, as was the usual, he rolled a two.

“Oh come on,” Jim groaned. “Can I try again?”

“Jim, we have discussed this before. You cannot spend the entire game attempting to seduce your Science Officer.”

“Now that we have gotten that over with,” Spock said, “I feel as though I must inform you that, due to a yet unknown technical malfunction, you now find yourself stranded in uncharted space, and, as I previously stated, surrounded by Klingon warbirds.”

After that, the game resumed as usual.

There was, of course, a miraculous victory from the crew of the Enterprise (with only a few casualties, mostly in the NPC department) and somehow Jim’s player character had ended up shirtless again, but they defeated the Klingons and saved the day. And then, soon enough, it was seven in the evening.

Time to leave.

Jim made his way over to the sofa, picking up his backpack where he’d dropped it earlier that evening. He slipped it over his shoulders before turning to his friends.

“Psst,” Jim said, careful to be quiet as he beckoned Nyota and Bones over to him. “Guys.”

Bones looked confused at first, but after a glance at Jim’s face, he knew exactly what was going on. “Oh no. No, nope, no way, not gonna happen.”

“Jim,” Nyota said, trying a different approach, “come on. Just wait a little longer if you’re nervous. I told you I could coach you if you wanted, and that offer still stands.”

“I don’t know… I just. Ugh. I have this gut feeling that I have to do it now.”

“Then just do it!” Bones said, voice getting gruffer with each passing moment. “You don’t need us with you to ask him out.”

“Well, it would be helpful?”

“Helpful,” Nyota deadpanned.

“Like… cheerleaders?”

"Cheerleaders?" Bones made a face.

“You’ve never actually asked someone out before have you.”

“Sure I have!”

Nyota and Bones gave each other a look.

“Please,” he hissed, voice still held at a whisper. No one could really explain why, but Spock had excellent hearing. He was just kind of like that. And Jim wasn’t willing to let him overhear this conversation. “You don't have to be right next to me, just nearby? In case something goes wrong. Or I catch on fire. Or Spock catches on fire…”

“I’ve got a date with T’Pring,” said Nyota. “I can’t help you with your love life right now, Jim.”

“Bones looked up. “Sorry Jimmy Boy. I’m busy too.”

“What? No excuse Bones? At least Nyota had something prepared.”

“Oh shut up.”

“You shut up.”

“You-”

“-are both acting like toddlers,” Nyota finished. “Come on Jim, get it together. Ask him out.”

“On what? A date? Does Spock even do dating?”

“You’ll never know until you get your shit together.”

With that, she slung her backpack over her shoulder and left, saying goodbye to them all on her way up the stairs.

Jim groaned.

“Well, that’s one way to do it,” Bones muttered.

“Bones…”

“Come on Jim, it’s not that hard. You just go over to him, tell him you like him. Ask him if he wants to go out with you.”

“And what do I do if he says no?”

“Say that it’s okay, you understand. Smile. Hold it together until you get somewhere you can cry safely.”

“Bones.”

“What? It’s solid advice.”

“Okay.” Jim took a deep breath. “What if he says yes?”

“You tell him that you’re really happy, and you like him a lot. I’d say give him a hug or something, but this is Spock we’re talking about, so avoid physical contact for now. And whatever you do, don’t say ‘cool’.”

“Don’t say cool?”

“No.”

“Why not?”

“Just don’t do it.”  

“Mm-hm. That’s how you charmed Miriam?”

“Oh shut up.”

And then, as though following in Nyota’s footsteps (probably purposefully, the bastard), Bones grabbed his backpack and ran up the stairs. Leaving Jim alone with Spock in the basement.

“Fuck,” Jim muttered.

“I fail to see a reason for such language,” a cool voice said from behind him.

Jim almost jumped out of his skin.

He spun around, face-to-face with the boy himself.

"Hi Spock!" Said Jim, voice jumping an octave from nerves.

Cue signature eyebrow raise. "Jim."

Jim took a deep breath. "I was wondering..." he felt his hands drop to his pockets as he tried to get the words out. "Well, you see... I like you-"

"I should hope so. We spend a fair amount of time together, in school and outside of it."

"Spock-"

"I am messing with you, Jim."

Jim looked up.

Spock was smiling.

Jim looked up the stairs, eyes tracing the paths Nyota and Bones had taken, then looked back at the ground at his feet, then looked back at Spock. "Did you overhear-?"

"Your entire conversation?" Spock shrugged. "Perhaps."

"Do you want to-?"

"Yes."

"Oh... wow, I...."

"Jim?"

"Spock?"

"Do not say 'cool'."

[mirkwoodshewolf]

Aladdin Queen fic John Deacon x reader Chap. 8; Love is formed

*Author’s note*

Okay everyone here it is, my most FAVORITE SONG OF ALADDIN AND MY FAV. PART TO WRITE. And since I love both versions of this song SOOOO much I leave it up to you all on what you want to listen to. Whether its the OG or the LA version I’ll have both links up for you all to enjoy. So I’ll shut up now and let you all get to it and OHHH CHALLENGE ESP. TO US GIRLS!!! DON’T. SING. JASMINE’S PART!!!!! Since you the reader are basically Aladdin’s part you’re gonna have to sing the male part while Deacy takes over the female vocals hehehe. So hope you all enjoy that challenge :)

OG version

LA version

Taglist:

@plethora-of-things​

@psychosupernatural​

@waddles03​

@ixchel-9275​

@georgesgentlyweepingguitar​

@queendeakyy​

@simonedk​

@kairosfreddie​

@geek-and-proud​

_________________________________________________________

After the party Freddie and I were in my guest room with my pacing around and Freddie brushing out his hair with his disguise now dropped.

“He just—walked out.”

“Perhaps I might’ve gone too far with the splits, but darling let’s be honest here. That dance was probably the best thing you will ever do in your entire life.”

“I was pretty good wasn’t I?” I bragged still remembering the look on that bitch Priyanka’s face as she tucked and run. But then I thought back to John, I mean nothing seems to impress him and I thought all royals loved treasures or women fighting over them. “But nothing seems to impress him.”

“I know. Not gems or jams or jewels. I mean if I can’t impress him, I wonder who can?” I looked out of my balcony to see just across from my balcony was the Princes’ balcony.  I saw John with Roger and Jim and the three of them went back into the room.

“What are you saying Freddie?” I asked as I turned towards him.

“I’m just saying maybe just try being yourself.”

“I already told you, he has to marry a Princess.” I sighed as I turned back towards the Princes’ balcony. “If I only just had a few minutes alone with him.” Then an idea came into my mind. “You have to get me over there?”

“That an official wish?” he asked me as he shook out his hair and turned towards me.

“No it’s more of a—favor. For a friend.”

“Sorry dear, genies really don’t do favors.” He said as he turned back towards the mirror and observed himself. “Plus we don’t really do friends.”

“But I thought you said you never had a friend like me.”

“See that’s where you’re wrong (y/n). I said you never had a friend like me. See when you’re a genie, people always want things from you it’s just—awkward.” He placed a turban on top of his head and modeled it wondering if it looked good on him.  That’s when I got a clever idea.

“Yeah, you’re right. Besides it would’ve involved distracting a—certain animal keeper to the Princes.”

“Oh-ho I see where this is going you clever minx, I hook you up, you hook me up, right?” Freddie said as came up in front of me with a wide smile while I just grinned back at him.

*3rd Person POV*

Now back in his disguise Freddie appeared at the Princes’ door and extended his hand outwards to the door, then using his magic he made three knocks sound off before they opened to reveal Jim.  He was surprised to see the advisor to the Princess and Freddie greeted him with a smile.

“Good evening.”

“How did you get past the guards?” questioned Jim.

“Oh I uhh—I snuck past them.”

“All 48 of them? Even the ones that spit fire? Impressive.” Jim said in a blunt tone.

“Well—that’s what people say about me.” Freddie chuckled nervously. Jim however just gave him an unimpressed look. “Oh that—that came out arrogant didn’t it? I mean I’m not overly arrogant or a prick I just I don’t know why I said that. Uhh….” He then saved himself by bring out from his back, a small bouquet of roses.

“They’re lovely.” Jim awed. “He’ll hate them.” Jim then suddenly spoke with a blunt matter-of-fact tone. “Tell the Princess that the way to Prince John’s heart is through his mind.”

“Actually these are from me—to you.” Freddie said. Jim’s face softened and he said softly.

“Could you excuse me for one moment?” Jim said as he reached for the doors and slowly closed them.

“No, wait I just….” Freddie tried to save himself but the doors closed in on him before he could say another word.

Jim remained calm as he slowly turned towards the Princes before finally letting go and silently pumping his arms up and down in victory.  John, Brian and Roger also mouthed out a cheer for him.

Meanwhile from the hallway Freddie turned his head angrily muttering to himself.

“‘Not that I’m overly arrogant’ really Freddie? That made you sound like a right up arsehole basically.” The doors opened up and Freddie turned back and smiled at Jim.  Jim took the roses and said.

“My favorite, I plant these all the time back home for the Princes garden. You may continue.”

“I was noticing of how—pleasant the evening is. At the party I noticed you noticing…me how—pleasant I am. Right, how is this going?” Freddie stammered awkwardly before asking cautiously.

“It’s clumsy. But in a…..charming sort of way.” Jim answered him honestly.

“A stroll.” Freddie blurted out. “Would you like to take an evening stroll with me?”

“Just the two of us? On purpose?”

“Yes, as people.” Jim was silent once again before whispering softly.

“Just one more minute.”

“Okay.” As Jim closed the doors once more, Freddie muttered, “Why the fuck would I say that?” as the doors fully closed he turned aside and softly growled “That woman is contagious!”

Inside the room, Jim tossed the bouquet over to John who caught it and he gestured and mouthed out ‘go’ to Jim.  Jim opened the doors once again and he said to Freddie.

“I’ve never really been on a stroll, how does it work?”

“Follow me my dear and I’ll show you.” The two men then walked side by side of each other, their hands briefly rubbing off against one another.

*My POV*

“I’m happy Jim finally found someone while we were here.” I heard Prince Brian say from the balcony.

“Yeah, he seems to be happy with Ali’s advisor. He looks like he’s a lot of fun, maybe I’ll ask if he’d like to go for a ride in the gardens.” Prince Roger spoke.

“You know you just wanna interrogate the poor guy in case he hurts Jim.” John’s voice spoke up.

“I just care about Jim’s wellbeing. I mean remember that one arsehole that used him to get to us, mainly you Brian.”

“I’d—rather not talk about that thank you Rog.” I then decided to make my presence known so I knocked on the corner of the wall and I heard John say.

“Come in.”

“Actually I’m already in.” I said cautiously as I came around the column pillar.

“Don’t move!” John warned me.  That’s when I saw both the lion and lioness stand up and growl at me, but the lioness seemed more protective as she looked like she was ready to attack me.

“I just came back because you left so…..”

“How did you—get there?” he asked curiously. I closed me mouth and said the first two words that came to my mind.

“Magic carpet?” he just scoffed at me.

“I, for one, am glad you’re here though Princess Ali.” Spoke Prince Brian as he stood up holding some sort of creature in his hand.  It looked kinda like a mongoose of sorts but it wasn’t like anything I’ve ever seen before. It was big, probably the size of a domestic cat, it had grey fur for the back but black on its underbelly, around it’s face was white with black lines along the eyes.

“You are?”

“Yes. For hours I’ve been trying to find Ababwa but it doesn’t seem to be on any of my maps. Care to show me?”

“Well I…..”

“Yes. I would also like to know just why your kingdom isn’t on any map.” John spoke up as he crossed his arms.  As I took a step forward, the lioness took a step forward while the male lion softly roared. “Now Nala. You and your brother can’t eat the princess tonight she needs her legs for dancing.”

“Did I go too far with the split?” I asked as I finally began walking forward while the two big cats were distracted.

“A little. Ababwa?”

“Yes.” I spoke loudly before finally muttering to myself, “Freddie I need to find Ababwa, they have maps, lots of maps.” I cleared my throat as I finally stood by the two princes and picked up the map and held it over my face in between me and John’s face specifically. “Ababwa, of course.” I remained silent for a bit before finally saying again, “Ababwa.”

Finally I saw a cartoon drawing of Freddie on the map in his genie formed and he waved at me.  He then began flying about and I followed his frantic movements as his genie tail began drawing random kingdoms at the center.  Along a banner it read ‘WEMBLEY KINGDOM.’

‘Not funny Freddie!’ I mouthed at him.  He then waved another banner in big bold letters that read JUST BE YOURSELF, his drawing scowling at me with his arms crossed. ‘Fred enough of…..’ John’s hand came on top of the map and he bent it over as he told me.

“Have you lost your country?” oh Allah say something you idiot.

“What no? No! No not at all its……” I set the map down trying to stand between the map and John. “It’s right here.” I pointed in a random spot. His brow rose skeptically as he said.

“I don’t think so, see I was with Brian when he was—” he looked down and low and behold Freddie had drawn the fake kingdom of Ababwa and gotten rid of the other drawings he had done, even his drawing was gone.

“There it is!” I exclaimed cheerfully.  John and Brian hovered over the map and Brian said.

“How did I miss that?”

“Well I mean who needs maps anyways? They’re old, and useless and add no practical value.” I said as I took the map away from the desk.

“Maps are how we see the world.” Brian said as he set down his pet.

“But I thought a prince could go anywhere?” I asked. All three of them had solemn faces as Roger finally spoke up.

“Not these princes unfortunately.” John especially seemed to look the most solemn and heartbroken.

“Well, if you’d—Prince John I’d gladly oh!” I felt a brush up against my leg and a soft bite on my shoe.  I know it wasn’t intentionally at my foot per-say, but I did feel small teeth nibble into my skin.

“Ahh Lulu naughty girl!” Prince Brian scolded as he came up and picked the creature up.  “Sorry, she’s always been a curious little badger but I’ve never seen her act like this before.” Then just before Brian could catch her, she went between my legs, her medium sized body knocking into my heels sending me towards the ground.

“Oh dear Princess Ali are you…..” just before Brian could help me up, the male lion stood between him and I.

“Simba! Nala!” Roger proclaimed as I was now surrounded by two massive big cats.  The female lioness standing right over me growling right into my face for a bit till it suddenly softened.

The male’s face also softened and soon the female slowly licked my face from my forehead down to my chin.  The two of them softly bellowed a soft roar as I said.

“Thank you…..Nala.” I scratched the side of her face and she leaned into my hand and accepted my scratches while Simba came up and plopped right down beside me and raised his paw up and wrapped it around my neck which ended up bringing me down and forcing my face to be buried into his dark mane.

“Incredible.” I heard Brian mutter.  Once I had my fill of lion snuggles and managed to break free of their loving grips, I adjusted myself and said as I walked out towards the balcony.

“I was saying you should really see these places. I mean there’s a whole world beyond books and maps. Do you want to?”

“How? There are guards at every door.” John stated bluntly as he looked at me.

“Who said anything about using a door?” I said as I walked towards the railing.

“What are you doing?” John’s tone turned into an alarmed tone as he came down the steps.

“Sometimes my English Princes, you just—have to take a risk.” I said as I swung over to the other side of the railing before finally letting go.

*John’s POV*

We all let out a gasp as Princess Ali just fell to her death.  All was quiet as I looked from side to side.

“Please tell me we didn’t just witness a suicide.” Spoke Roger.  Suddenly slowly rising up sitting perfectly fine and alive was Princess Ali on top of a—no way they really do exist? I thought these things were just stories.

“Is this…..” I asked as I walked up to her.

“A magic carpet? Yeah.” She scooted closer to the edge of the carpet and said to me, “Do you trust me?” wait a second. Did—did she just say what I thought she said?

“What?”

“Do you trust me?” she said again as she extended her hand out to mine.  I turned towards Brian and Roger and they nodded and gestured for me to go on.  I turned back towards Ali and gave her my hand as I said.

“Yes.” She then helped me onto the magic carpet. The two of us sat down on top of the magic carpet and as Nala came up towards the balcony bellowing out a whine, the carpet took off flying over the entire city.

It was then I heard Ali beginning to sing, and my god she—had the voice of an angel.  The only other voice to sing so sweetly like that was my mother.  We flew through the tight alleyways of the Agrabah city and I couldn’t help but be in awe of the city at night.  When I turned back towards Ali, she had a small plum petunia in her hand and she held it out to me.

I took it and sniffed it as it’s delicate scent tickled my nose as we continued to fly through the rooftops of the city now before flying high into the sky.  Going up and over the clouds before slowly diving back down through them, like whales breaching in the ocean.  Even going as far to fly across the moon.

*Ali*

I can show you the world Shining, shimmering, splendid Tell me, my prince, now when did You last let your heart decide?

I can open your eyes Take you wonder by wonder Over, sideways and under On a magic carpet ride

A whole new world A new fantastic point of view No one to tell us no Or where to go Or say we're only dreaming

        I then began to feel the song in my heart as we continued to fly high over the clouds.  Soon the magic carpet even handed us some armful of clouds for Ali and I to hold.  

Never did I dream that I would actually get to hold a cloud it was more—fluffier than I imagined.  Kinda like feeling stuffing.

        As Ali’s cloud broke apart, I released my cloud go as we spun around a cloud making it into the shape of whipped cream topping before doing a loop-de-loop.  We now flew alongside a flock of cranes and I couldn’t help but extend my arms out, it was then we were briefly tossed off the carpet before being caught again, doing somersaults as we went higher and higher into the diamond lit sky.

*Me*

A whole new world A dazzling place I never knew But when I'm way up here It's crystal clear That now I'm in a whole new world with you *Ali*

Now I'm in a whole new world with you

*Me*

Unbelievable sights Indescribable feeling Soaring, tumbling, freewheeling Through an endless diamond sky

A whole new world

We flew straight down from the sky and through the clouds to see a river coming up.  I closed my eyes but she took my wrists and gently took them away from my eyes as we flew right over the water before going back up towards the sky to see the city of Agra.  The Taj Mahal standing so proudly just ahead as we flew over it.

We then flew far out of the city towards the open desert to see a herd of wild horses running freely.  As we got closer to them, I stroked the youngest stallion underneath his chin and he whinnied while we flew on ahead of the herd. *Ali*

Don't you dare close your eyes *Me*

A hundred thousand things to see *Ali*

Hold your breath - it gets better *Me*

I'm like a shooting star I've come so far I can't go back to where I used to be

*Ali*

A whole new world *Me*

Every turn a surprise *Ali*

With new horizons to pursue *Me*

Every moment red-letter

Now flying over the Indian ocean we both looked down to see the dolphins swimming up to the surface doing their breaching technique, the moon bouncing off the water gave it a beautiful glow and as I looked towards Ali, the moon also gave her an ethereal beauty, especially from her raven hair to her bright (e/c) eyes.

We turned to face each other as our song came to a close and I could feel my heart beat just a little bit faster at seeing her eyes shine like the stars under the moonlight. *Both*

I'll chase them anywhere There's time to spare Let me share this whole new world with you

*Ali (Me)*

A whole new world (A whole new world)

That's where we'll be (that’s where we’ll be) *Ali*

A thrilling chase *Me*

A wondrous place *Both*

For you and me

We leaned up against each other, my head on top of hers and her head resting against my shoulder as my hand gently took hers and they intertwined with each other’s.

After seeing the world we stopped right back into the city of Agrabah to see the people having a celebration of their own in the middle of their city.  A large bonfire was at the center, drummers banging on the drums in rhythm while the people danced in a circle and cheered.  I looked over to Ali and took off my white vest and draped it over her shoulders to keep her warm.  She turned to me and smiled in gratitude.

���Of all the places you’ve shown me tonight this is by far the most beautiful.”

“Sometimes you just have to look at it from a new perspective.” She answered.

“It’s them. The people. No matter what skin color they are, they make it beautiful. And they deserve to have an ally who knows that. I don’t see how that ever could be me.”

“Because it should be you.” She answered.

“Do you really think so?” I asked as I turned to face her.

“Does it really matter what I think?” she said as she tucked a strand of my hair behind my ear, much like how (y/n) did a couple nights ago.  

But it—it couldn’t be her. Could it? So I decided to test something out.

“You know,” I slowly moved my arm around her waist. “It’s a shame that Abu had to miss this.”

“Nah, he hates parties, besides he’s……” she stopped talking and I saw her face fall. So it was her. It was (y/n)!

“I knew it, you are (y/n)! Why did you lie to me!?” I said as I backed away from her.

“John I’m sorry.” She pleaded.  No she doesn’t get any mercy from me.

“Did you really think I was stupid? That I wouldn’t figure it out?!”

“No, no you’re not stupid I was just….”

“Tell me the truth. Is your name (Y/n) or Ali?!”

“I’m Princess Ali.”

“So (y/n) wasn’t real?”

“No she is! Because I’m also (y/n). I—just use the name (y/n) for when I need to disguise myself amongst the commoners. To—escape the pressures of palace life.” I just looked at her with a skeptical glare and I asked her.

“Why didn’t you just tell me the day we met?”

“Well I mean you know—royalty going out into the city in disguise it sounds kinda strange don’t it?” well she’s got me there. I mean after it was my idea that Roger and I dress as commoners to escape the palace just shortly after we had arrived.

“Not that strange.” I said as I gently nudged her shoulder with mine.  “I’m sorry I snapped at you. Is just I can’t believe I didn’t recognize you.”

“It’s okay. People just don’t see the real you when you’re royalty.” Don’t I know that much.  We looked at each other and that’s when I returned the favor and tucked a strand of hair behind her ear.

“We should—” she started off.  I looked down at her and she continued, “We should head back.”

“Already?” I sighed and that’s when Ali had the magic carpet take us back to the palace.

We arrived back at my balcony and I could see the lights were off, so I’m hoping Brian and Roger are asleep by now.  Ali helped me off the magic carpet and handed me back my vest and that’s when the magic carpet lowered itself down.

“Goodnight, Princess Ali.”

“Sweet dreams, Prince John.” She said softly with a soft smile.  Slowly the two of us began leaning forward when suddenly she was pushed right up into my face.  Well I guess I’ll have the thank that magic carpet tomorrow.  I then leaned the rest of the way and softly kissed her lips.

She kissed me back and it felt like an eternity before the desperate need for air became necessary.  I pulled away before giving her a warm smile and turning my back on her to walk into our room.

*3rd Person POV*

After the kiss and John turned back into his room, (y/n) extended her arms outward as she whispered.

“Yes.” Before falling back onto Carpet who flew away from the balcony and (y/n) let out a giggly, whooping cheer.  However she was unaware of Iago who had witnessed the entire thing.

“Fascinating.” He crooned darkly.

Back in her room, Carpet stopped right at her balcony where Freddie now in full genie mode was drinking a cup of vodka and he said as he saw (y/n)’s face.

“Ohh I love that face. Good date?”

“The best.” She answered with a reply.

Meanwhile in the Princes room Roger and Brian who were still awake while Jim was preparing John for bed, John said to them.

“But it was better than the best.”

“Wow Deacy, who would’ve thought you had it in you.” Roger praised.

“However the thing was Roger we’ve actually met her.”

“Wait what do you mean?”

“He even figured out that I was (y/n). You said that wouldn’t happen.” (y/n) told Freddie.

“Well genie magic is really just a façade. Eventually real characters are always gonna show up. But that’s a good thing, right? Now he knows.”

“Well…..” she dragged out.

“Wai—hold-hold up now. What?”

“She told me that she was only pretending to be a thief to escape the stress of palace life, but she’s really a Princess.” John explained to Roger just after Jim finished brushing his hair. “Thank you Jim, you can retire for the night.”

“Thank you Prince John. Good night boys.”

“Night Jim.” Said Brian.

“G’night Jimmy boy” Roger called out as Jim left their bedrooms to go to his sleeping quarters.

“And you believed that?” asked Roger.

“I think so.” John said as he got into his bed.

“(Y/n) darling, eventually you are going to have to tell him the truth.”

“Eventually I will tell him Freddie. But anyway, how was your stroll with Jim?”

“Oh no, no, no you are not turning the conversation around dear.”

“I’m not I’m genuinely curious. How did it go?” Freddie looked at me skeptically but when he saw that I wasn’t lying to him, he proceeded to tell me everything.  He seemed to really like Jim, and heck maybe by the end of it all, maybe they could end up together.  Sure it’s frowned upon but love is love and that’s how everyone should live their lives, right?

Brian turned to his side to face John and asked him.

“You don’t think that maybe you want believe her because you have to marry a Princess, but can’t marry a thief?”

“No Brian. I believe her. I do.” John said affirmatively.  He looked up at the ceiling before sighing softly and shutting his eyes to rest for a new day.

[buzzdixonwriter]

You Don’t Say

For me, one of the unforeseen benefits of Facebook and other social media is that it gives me a chance to do rough drafts of ideas, assembling my thoughts and getting feedback before committing to more permanent form.

And sometimes, like asteroids colliding in space, two separate ideas / posts slam into one another and either create something new and unexpected, or else shatter themselves and reveal interesting aspects of their nature heretofore hidden from view.

That happened recently with a pair of Facebook posts I made on Dennis Prager and Harlan Ellison.

Let’s get the turd out of our mouth first.

. . .

Dennis Prager is a purveyor of herpetology lubricants admired by many on the right-leaning-nazi side of the spectrum, primarily because he keeps his mouth closed when chewing.  Half of what he says is repackaged self-evident truths of the “Don’t eat the yellow snow” variety, a quarter is opinions that if not startling original are at least not genuinely harmful, and the remain quarter is egregious bullshit for which he deserves a public pants down spanking.

Hmm, what?  Oh, yes; purely metaphorically, of course.

I long since wrote off Prager as a. utterer of inanities, but recently his turdmongering was forced on my attention by someone who posted a link to Prager’s argument that the “left” (i.e., basically anybody who thinks Auschwitz was a Bad Idea) is inflicting harm on both the American body politic and the universe at large by denying people like Prager the right to drop the N-bomb whenever they feel like it.

As some of you no doubt already knew, Prager is a member of what polite bigots used to refer to as “those of the Hebrew persuasion”.

That a person from an ethnicity that historically suffered hatred so vicious and specifically targeted that a special word had to be created for it (“anti-Semitism” because the original word -- “Jew-hatred” -- was too damned ugly even for bigots to use) now has his knickers in a twist because he’s “not allowed” to use the only other word of equal or greater impact -- also coined specifically by oppressors for expressing unrestrained hate and contempt against those oppressed -- is so rich in irony that all I can do is swipe a phrase from Jim Wright over at Stonekettle Station and say Dennis Prager has “all the self-awareness of a dog licking its own asshole in the middle of the street”.

First off, he’s lying: Neither the “left” nor American law prevents him from dropping the N-bomb whenever he feels like it and I invite him to go down to the intersection of Normandie and Florence in South Central and drop it at the top of his lungs for as long as he is able and please make sure to take plenty of video recorders along because I really wanna see what happens next.

Second, why the fuck would you want to say that? Seriously, other than in an evidentiary context (a cop giving testimony in court, a journalist reporting what some bigoted politician says, etc.), who today gains anything from repeating the word other than inflicting unjustified distress on people who have done nothing to deserve it?

(This is the point where a bunch of alt-right trolls are gonna jump up and say “but whatabout all the times when black people say it?” and to those trolls I’m gonna say STFU & STFD; if you can’t grasp the difference in context then you’re too damned stupid to be allowed out in public except at the end of a leash and with a ball gag in your mouth.)

It’s a word specifically created and designed to be used to brutally oppress people who did nothing to deserve that brutal oppression.  Why would anybody outside that group use it except to participate in that brutal oppression?

. . .

Least there sit any in the cheap seats who presume the above rant was targeted at Dennis Prager simply because he was Jewish, guess again, ya yutzes.

Few writers enjoyed as brilliant and as incendiary a career as Harlan Ellison, and I count myself privileged to have been one of his friends.

Ellison, as many of you know, also was Jewish, a damned tough little bastard, singled out for hatred and abuse as the only Jewish child in his backwater Ohio school, growing up with nerves & balls of chromium, a bona fide Army Ranger, and a writer so honest and fearless that when he wrote about juvenile delinquency in the 1950s he did so by infiltrating and joining a street gang to get first hand experience and insight on the kids who ran in that crowd (and as icing on the cake, James Caan played him in the TV version!).

Top that, Dennis.

Harlan’s electric eclectic career features many highpoints, but the one I want to focus on is his brief 4-year run as TV critic for the legendary Los Angeles Free Press (a.k.a. The Freep) from 1968 to 1972.  

What’s interesting is that Harlan did this while at the same time at the height of his demand as a TV writer.

You got any idea how hard it is to make a living while you’re gnawing on the hand that feeds you?

Harlan may have been crazy, but damn it, he was honest.

Back to the issue at hand.

Recently I’ve been re-reading his TV criticism columns, collected in two volumes, The Glass Teat and The Other Glass Teat.

The depressing thing is that all the evil we see today was in place back in those days, and the same smug pious frauds and their dimbulb marks kept congratulating themselves how wonderful they were as things continued to spiral out of control.

Oh, we've had good moments when we made changes that improved the lot of people who'd previously been marginalized, but the core cancer is still there. Harlan was no cock-eyed sentimentalist -- he was often filled with anger and could vent it spectacularly at deserving targets -- but he did have hope that somehow we could keep nudging the ball further towards the goal lines.

The columns make fascinating reading; they are nowhere near as dated as one might suspect. Sometimes they offer diamond-like brilliant dissections of a particular instant in the cultural gestalt, other times they examine the unseen (well, to most audiences, that is) tides of Hollywood that shape our media, sometimes he turns his attention to bear on seemingly insignificant and forgotten local programming only to show with McLuhan-esque clarity how that tiny piece of seemingly insignificant fluff is symptomatic of a much wider, much vaster, and far more serious problem.

One entry caught my eye in particular, the March 7, 1969 column on a failed ABC pilot called Those Were The Days.

Harlan sat in the studio audience watching the taping of that pilot, and his column praised the courage and insight of producers Norman Lear and Bud Yorkin, the brilliant performances of Carroll O’Connor and Jean Stapleton, and the raw honesty of the pilot’s sharp comedy and writing.

Those of you not in the cheap seats have already realized this was the second failed pilot for what would eventually become All In The Family over at CBS (there was an even earlier original pilot called Justice For All back when Archie and Edith’s last name was Justice, not Bunker.)

I remember the hoopla when All In The Family finally aired in January of 1971 as a mid-season replacement.

You might count Archie Bunker as the white Dolemite insofar as the comedy sprang from the shock of all the crude and vulgar things he said.

Lear and Yorkin were mocking that mindset, belittling bigotry, exposing the Babbittry of millions of “good” Americans who lacked either the self-awareness or the courage to take a long introspective look at themselves and realize how badly they were failing as citizens of this country.

Audiences weren’t supposed to like Archie Bunker.

And that’s where Lear and Yorkin made their fatal mistake.

No, audiences didn’t like Archie.

They loved him.

. . .

Asteroids collide, and sometimes they form new planets, and sometimes they shatter and expose what lies beneath.

Prager’s modern day Babbittry crashed into Harlan’s half-century old anti-Babbittry, and from the explosion a stark truth revealed itself.

It’s almost impossible to make an outlaw a villain in popular media.

No matter how many banks they rob, stages they hold up, sheriffs they shoot, the mere fact that somebody wrote a song / dime novel / movie about ‘em makes them into heroes.

Demi-gods.

People to be admired.

Emulated.

Professional wrestling knows this.

You can never be so big a heel that you won’t have a legion of followers.

And you can turn a heel into a baby face in the blink of an eye and none of the fans will remember the despicable acts the wrassler did just last week.

You put an Archie Bunker on TV, you do not get millions of people to recognize themselves in his hateful / hurtful behavior and change their ways.

Oh, hell no; you get millions of people to applaud him for saying and doing what they say and do in private.

And now that it’s all big and bold and brassy on TV, why it becomes even easier to say it in the privacy of your own home, then over the fence with the neighbors, then in the bar down the street, then on the street itself, and then against people who have done you no harm, who have committed no sin other than the heinous crime of not being exactly like you.

I remember watching and liking All In The Family when it first came on because I, like millions of other Americans, got the joke:  Archie was no hero.

But it wasn’t long before the voices cheering Archie began to drown out the voices laughing at him.

Lear and Yorkin tried undoing their damage with Maude and The Jeffersons and Good Times and other spinoff shows, but the bigot was out of the bottle.

Archie Bunker, even though written in a way to ridicule his use of bigotry and stereotypes, became a champion and defender of those who clung to said bigotry and stereotypes.

So tell me again why you want to drop that N-bomb, Dennis.

Explain to me -- even while you talk out of both sides of your mouth and claim even if everybody can use they word maybe they shouldn’t use the word -- how that does anything to help anybody…

…other than bigots and hate mongers.

Your argument is as circular as the thumb and forefinger gesture white supremacists use to signal one another, a gesture deliberately chosen because it lets them transgress openly by lying about the truth meaning of their gesture.

And Harlan, you were right about Those Were The Days as it began evolving into All In The Family.  Absolutely brilliant -- but absolutely deadly.

Not airing All In The Family wouldn’t have eliminated racial / ethnic / sexual prejudice in the United States…

…but it would have denied those ideas a voice.

The narcissist always proclaims, “I don’t care what they say about me so long as they spell my name right.”

Well, that’s what we got with Archie Bunker.

None of the bigots cared if we made fun of their ideas…

…just so long as they got their ideas out there.

Because ideas are made legitimate by their presence.

Now clearly, this is a bade that cuts both ways.

Ideas once unthinkable -- liberty and justice for all in the form of racial and gender equality, f’r instance -- need to be championed in public.

But we need to shout down and stamp out the bad ideas.

The United States took their foot off the neck of the defeated white racists after the end of the Civil War, and as a result jim crow came roaring back, and things did not change for millions of Americans for another entire century.

We allowed bigots and hate mongers and slavers to be whitewashed and glorified and forgiven for their crimes against humanity…

…and in the process we allowed them to continue victimizing African-Americans more and more.

Every song about the Ol’ South, every novel glorifying plantation life, every movie showing happy field hands, every statue commemorating murderous traitors as men of honor and principle, every single iteration of that idea made millions of people’s suffering not just possible but inevitable.

. . .

Now this is the point where the alt-right trolls are gonna jump up and ask “did you ever drop the N-word?”

Not in casual conversation, no.

I was born and raised in the South (Appalachia, mostly); my father’s side of the family were almost all Southerners.

Almost all.

My paternal grandmother was born and raised in New Jersey and met my grandfather when both served in the U.S. Army medical corps in WWI.  When my grandfather died in his 40s, my grandmother originally moved back to New Jersey, but her three children (dad and two aunts) felt heartbroken at having to leave their Southern cousins and friends behind so even though she carried no particular love for the South, my grandmother moved her family back and stayed there for the most of her life (she and one of my aunts moved out to California to be near us, but that’s another story for another post).

One thing my grandmother absolutely refused to tolerate was use of the N-bomb anywhere near her, especially under her roof or in the homes of her children.

This included both the -er and -ra variants, because Southern racists who didn’t want to appear as uncultured and as boorish and as bigoted as their backwoods cousins preferred the second pronunciation because they could claim they were actually speaking respectfully about “colored people”.

So I grew up in the rare white Southern home where the N-bomb merely wasn’t used, it was actually denounced as wrong.

Now, don’t go thinking my grandmother was some great paragon of virtue; she wasn’t (she was hell on wheels, in fact, but that’s another story for another post).

But she did recognize there was something wrong with the use of the N-bomb, and whether she demanded her children never use it in any form to keep them from appearing to be boorish, bigoted louts, or whether she just thought it was simple good manners of the golden rule variety not to use it, I dunno.

But I do know we never used it, and when my parents heard our neighbors or schoolmates use it, we were reminded in no uncertain terms that we were never to use it.

But that doesn’t mean I haven’t used it.

A couple of decades ago I wrote a screenplay based on the life of Robert Smalls, in particular his incredible escape from Civil War Charleston by hijacking a Confederate gunboat and sailing it right past Ft. Sumter to join the Union fleet, bringing his wife and several other escaping African-Americans with him.

As a skilled harbor pilot, Smalls enjoyed certain privileges other enslaved African-Americans didn’t.

For example, he was allowed to go about the streets of Charleston unescorted…

…provided he wore a big diamond shaped brass tag around his neck.

Like a dog.

The tag indicated to slave catcher patrols that he was one of the “good” ones, that he could be trusted because he was helping his masters in their struggle against the Union by guiding blockade runners into the safety of Charleston harbor.

But knowing Southerners the way I do, and knowing the kind of low class good ol’ boy types they recruited for such jobs, I couldn’t imagine the slave catcher patrols being particularly courteous to him, even when they knew they had to let him pass because clearly he had the protection of some high positioned muckamuck.  

And I could easily imagine them flinging the N-bomb at him with great glee, taunting him, daring him to act “uppity” so they could beat the crap out of him and teach him some manners and remind him of his place.

So I used the word in their dialog in my script.

Would I use that word today?

Probably not.

It’s not that crucial to the story, and if the viewer doesn’t grasp the concept that these are bigoted bully scum from their actions and attitude, then I’ve failed my job as a writer.

Have I ever quoted people who dropped the N-bomb?

Yeah, I have, in the past.

I’ve quoted Richard Pryor and Blazing Saddles and Reservoir Dogs and Pulp Fiction.

I would excuse it then as the aforementioned evidentiary context but ya know what?  I don’t quote those lines anymore.

I still think Pryor is hilarious and will recommend his routines to anyone I think might be interested, but he as a member of the African-American community at large (because like any other ethnic group, African-Americans have numerous sub-cultures and sub-communities among them), he could say things in a way neither I nor any other white person could say them.

(And, yeah, there’s a big debate going on to this very day among African-Americans about the appropriateness of that word and you know what?  Whatever decision African-Americans reach for themselves is their business and should not involve any input whatsoever from we white folk; we not only can’t use the word, we can’t even comment on how they choose to use it.  Period.  Full stop.)

Blazing Saddles when it came out used the N-bomb to be deliberately transgressive, to make a sympathetic point re how unfairly African-Americans were treated.

All well and good.

But nine years earlier there had been a movie called A Patch Of Blue and while it wasn’t a raucous comedy like Blazing Saddles it tried making a point about race relations in America and it was a really. Really good movie and it made some important points but today is virtually unwatchable not because of any flaws in it but because the times have changed.

Ditto Blazing Saddles.

We don’t need to approach the problem that way any more.

Quentin Tarantino?  I really like what he does as a director and a screenwriter but his use of the N-bomb to show us how transgressive his characters are is really shallow.  I have a strong feeling his movies are going to be considered embarrassingly passé’ in a generation or two, much the same way as benign-yet-stereotypical characters in 1940s movies render many of them passé’ today.  

Reservoir Dogs and Pulp Fiction lose nothing by changing the N-word to something else.  

Maybe an argument could be made for its use in Django Unchained or The Hateful 8 but even there I think substituting another word wouldn’t significantly change the tenor or tone of either movie.

So I stop quoting those lines from Tarantino’s films, at least not fully.

I can admire his skill / talent / craft without signing off on his problematic elements.

Let me offer an analogy: If a creator can get the same dramatic effect by pretending to shoot somebody but not actually blasting them with a gun, then they can get the same dramatic effect by using something evocative of the N-bomb without actually dropping it.

(By the way, for those who may be curious, my mother was from Naples and a bona fide card carrying member of Mussolini’s Fascist Youth Brigade, but that’s another story for another post.)

. . .

We are plunging into a new cultural conflict -- and while I think there will be violence, I don’t see it being violence on the scale or level of political organization as the Civil War -- and we can only win by refusing to let the bigots and the hate mongers spew their bullshit in the marketplace of ideas.

There is no compromise with an oppressor.

Stand up to it every time you encounter it.

Make it unthinkable, never acceptable. 

  © Buzz Dixon

[guccimochiblog]

Park’s Polyjuice Portion |PJM

• Pairing: Jimin x reader

• Genre: Harry Potter!au, major fluff and basically a crack, Body switching.

• Word count: 2.8k

• a/n: Hii!!! Erm so this is my first one-shot on tumblr, so I don’t know how to really feel about this ;) This is also my first time writing something involving Harry Potter’s Hogwarts so if I make errors, please, pretty please correct me! Lastly, I hope you guys reading this like this, thank you! <3<3<3

• Summary: You’re a muggle with a wizard best friend, who’s dragged into the ball at Hogwarts, only to be stuck with annoyingly gorgeous men and happen to meet someone who’s not who you actually think he is.

“Oh come on Y/n, it’s really not as bad you think!”

You listen to him exclaimed while you continue to do the dishes after having breakfast. Your best friend Hoseok has been practically begging you ever since he appeared magically in your house.

No, really.  He did actually magically appear in your house.

“Hobi,” you call, “They’ll realize I’m a muggle just by looking at me, I’m not going!”

“So? If anything I’ll have your back,” Hoseok assures. “Plus, if you do see any magic happen, your memory will be erased anyway.”

You glare at him before he, “Okay, well not really since you’re the only family I have and were the one who was told about me getting into the school.”

You’re honestly so so proud of your best friend for making it into Hogwarts but that’s about it. You have no intention to meet other wizards, so let alone going to the ball overflowed with them. You’ll feel completely left out and there’s no way you’re going there.

“Y/n,”

“No means no. Plus, I still don’t understand why you want to take me when there are plenty of other girls that are literally ‘dying’ to dance with you!” You don’t forget to use your fingers for speech marks when emphasising the words.

The man sassily just rolls his eyes at you, “Y/n, if you come-”

“No.”

“I’ll grant you as many foods you want.”

“Oh?”

And that’s all it took for Jung Hoseok to get you to be his partner for the night.

Dressed up in a glittery, not too long dress, you show up at the ball that’s literally filled up like an ocean of the unknowns. Since you saw this coming, you’re not very disappointed as you stand while looking around the unfamiliar faces, when your eyes finally stop at a very astonishingly dashing guy.

He’s standing with his group of friends, with a smile tucking in his gorgeous lips. His eyes almost disappear when he laughs ever so cutely. His cheeks look full yet with a jawline sharper than perhaps your brain itself.

You’ve only stared at him for at least more than two minutes and he already, at least, brushed his hair back with his fingers, like six times.

You gulp. Holy crap you don’t think you’ve ever seen anyone This perfect before.

You really thought Hoseok was the only one but that thought is clearly about to change.

You can’t help but subconsciously keep your eyes glued to him when you abruptly hear a whistle, close enough to your ear to tickle and make you flinch.

Rolling your eyes thinking it’s your friend, you instantly grab his wrist and twist it painfully, simultaneously turning to face the taller man and to your surprise, the scoffing man isn’t Hoseok.

Eyes widening you quickly let go and step three inches back from the stranger. The guy simply chuckles in amusement at your reaction. His black doe eyes that look at the ground while laughing, now stare back at you. His revealed loveable smile reminding you of a bunny, faces you like you’re the entertainment he’s been looking for this boring night.

“Eh sorry I was just looking-”

“Admiring his looks right there?” He points out at the beautiful guy you were staring at.

You gulp before hesitantly looking up at the bunny boy. A huge, shocked, annoying sigh escapes your mouth at how seriously handsome this person before you is. Bloody hell are all the people at Hogwarts This good-looking?

Too bad no one would be interested in a muggle like you… Where’s Hobi though?

He literally just brought you here and then vanished again, saying he wanted to introduce you to his friend.

Busy talking to yourself in your mind, the guy smirks while observing your lost face as you look around for your best friend.

“I’m not surprised that you’ve been staring at him for so long,” he speaks. “He’s way too charming to resist, nearly the whole school wanted to be his partner but he chose to reject them all and leave his hunt for a partner for last minute.”

The guy talks so proudly as if he knows, the cute guy you were staring at, more than himself.

“You know you shouldn’t go too much into the looks though… Because his personality will make you surely fall in love with him.” He winks at you, followed by a smirk.

Okay, but you didn’t need to know this? Why’s he telling you all this?

“I haven’t seen you before,” Oh so now he realised.

“Huh oh, yeah,” you voice, “I don’t come here… A friend asked me to be his partner,” you tell him honestly and surprisingly a bit too casually for someone who easily stresses.

“No way you’re a muggle!” His eyes almost pop as he processes this info. “You do realize if anyone finds out-”

“Yeah yeah I know I might even get turned into a pumpkin,” you exaggerate, growing visibly nervous now.

The bunny boy chuckles before introducing himself, “I’m Jim-Jjjjungkook-!” You have no idea why he pulled the J so long as if he had forgotten his own name.

“I’m Y/n,”

“And that’s Jimin by the way, Park Jimin!” Jungkook snaps as he points again.

“I literally looked at him for once, why do you keep telling me about him? Can you tell me where Jung Hoseok is instead?” you ask while being anxious as he might announce to everyone that you’re a muggle and you’d probably get turned into an ant or whatever Hogwarts students do.

“You came with Hoseok?”

Before you could answer him and ask again where he might be, a hand is placed on Jungkook’s broad shoulder turning him to view two other boys.

Yep. It’s official. Everybody that goes to Hogwarts is unbelievably gorgeous and you are a clear witness of that.

One boy has grey hair while the other has green. The grey-haired boy is shorter than both green haired guy and Jungkook. Despite his height, the boy is no short when it comes to his beauty. A small, round shaped face with small eyes that naturally face downwards, resembling a cute cat. Lil meow meow.

The green haired guy, on the other hand, looked like a character straight from an anime. With one monolid and one partial double eyelid. You can only feel a unique aura coming from the tall boy.

“Where’s Namjoon hyung?” the green haired boy asks Jungkook, ignoring your existence.

“I don’t know dude, I just got here,” Jungkook replies. “Why?”

“Oh he has the potion-” the green haired boy is about to reveal when his eyes now travel down to you. “Nothing Jim- I mean, Jungkook.” He stutters.

“I see you’re having fun with…” he tries to scan your face and remember your name but how can he remember it when he’s never even seen you before.

“It’s Y/n,” you quietly let out with a slight smile.

“Hold on,” now the grey-haired boy says, “I’ve never seen you before.”

You’re ready to try to say something but before anything Jungkook’s body shifts a little close to your side and front, almost covering yours. “She’s with me. She’s from Beauxbatons Academy, she just happened to come later than others, so I’m just showing her around.”

The grey-haired boy nods silently as he buys whatever Jungkook just blabbered while the green haired boy, “well, hi! I’m Taehyung and this is Yoongi and welcome to Hogwarts!”

You smile in return to both of them as the charismatic boy named Taehyung passes you an endearing boxy smile whilst forwarding his hand. You accept his hand and both shake it until the boy brings your hand closer to his lips and gently kisses it. You feel like you’ve been hit with 440volts when this happens yet you only smile a little harder not realizing your cheeks getting a little pink.

Taehyung chuckles at your reaction when Jungkook suddenly moves more to the side, bumping your arm lightly in order for your and Taehyung’s contact to break.

“Hyung I thought you were looking for someone.”

“Oh right!” Taehyung’s eyes now widen like a busted child who forgot to do their assignment that is due next. “Let’s go hyung.”

“Don’t tell me what to do, I was gonna leave you here anyway,” Yoongi mutters before looking at the two of you, “See you both.”

“See ya! Bye gorgeous,” Taehyung softly murmurs but loud enough for you and Jungkook to hear, before leaving.

Jungkook turns to you now with his face not as bright as before when he was speaking to you but rather with an annoyed look.

You blink at him cluelessly. Then, you spot something strange. “Well you seemed to be more interested in speaking to Taehyung than with me and you just talked for two seconds,” Jungkook pouts.

“Well he sounded more gentle and someone who’s actually interested in wanting to know me unlike you who’s just looking for fun,” you easily state after you watch Taehyung vanish out of your sight and look back at Jungkook.

“I thought you were interested in that guy,” he points.

“I never said that.”

“Your eyes did,” he whispers in a flirty manner as if not you, but he’s the one in love with the other guy.

“Hey, I don’t even know him, let alone-”

“Jimin is a Slytherin and he’s one of the most popular guys in Hogwarts. He’s smart, funny and incredibly charming. I’d say he’s way more charming than Taehyung actually.”

“Jungkook,” you mutter, “your hair… Is it my eyes or are they changing colours?”

Jungkook doesn’t even check or stare in disbelief to your question but instead blinks twice in the realisation of something that you probably don’t know.

Then, his skin begins to act even weirder and you feel like you’re going crazy when you watch his skin look like little tennis balls wondering around under the skin of his face. It’s like his face was preparing to transform into a different one… And you realise that’s exactly what was happening when his eyes begin to change shape and without a warning, Jungkook grips onto your wrist tightly before dragging you with him to the unknown.

“Jungkook!” You exclaim, releasing your arm from his hold. “What the heck is going on!?”

You frown at his back facing you, “Jung-”

He turns around- no, someone else turns around. The same body yet different face- no, it’s not even the same body anymore, his body structure changed completely too. From tall to a shorter body yet still gifted with the stunningly fit body.

His hair no longer pitch black but a dark shade of brown. His eyes were more petite in contrast to his full lips.

“J- Jimin?”

“Ah, hey.”

“WHAT THE HECK?”

“Y/n I can explain,” he says as you stare at him frowning even more.

“You see, me and Jungkook just wanted to experiment this potion-”

“And it had to be tonight?” You exclaim not wanting to hear anymore.

“Yeah well,” Jimin tries to explain once again when suddenly the music changes and it was time for the dance. Jimin looks at you with worried eyes and you glare at him before turning around to leave him and find Hoseok as soon as possible.

“Y/n wait!” the boy holds onto your wrist once again.

“What?”

“Will you dance with me?”

You blink at the boy dumbfoundedly. Is he seriously asking a muggle to dance with him? He actually thinks you’re going to even get close to him without even knowing what kind of potion he’s hiding in his pocket to give you! You seriously shouldn’t have agreed to come here with Hoseok. That guy literally left you on your own ever since you got here.

“No.”

“But-”

“No! My answer is no! If I stay here any longer I swear to god I’m actually going to go crazy and how do I know you won’t do anything to me! Especially when you’re a Slytherin, how can I trust you?!”

Jimin sighs before recklessly digging his hands in his pocket.“You’re right. I’m a Slytherin, I shouldn’t be begging anyone to dance with me. In fact, I know your secret.”

Your jaw drops. “You won’t-”

“Shall we?” He passes a cheeky smile to you with his eyes threatening to disappear again. Sticking his arm out, only for yours to wrap around it, you nervously walk with him.

You then place your hand in his while he turns to snake his hand around your waist. Whisking you onto the ballroom floor, he makes you turn and twirl like some professional dancer until you somehow manage to bump into his chest as he pulled you close.

You try and resist as his ravishing feature does not help when it’s THIS close. Your other free hand is pressed against his chest as you separate your body from his when he swiftly pull you close again with the other hand.

“You know, you don’t have to pretend that you’re not interested in me,” he suggests in a seductive tone.

“Okay, I may have been captivated by your-"  Wait, Y/n what are you saying, you can’t boost his ego. You think to yourself.

"Look, I don’t even know you and we barely-”

“But I know you,”

“We just met- wait what?” you gaze puzzled at him while your body moves around and distancing from Jimin’s every once in a few seconds.

“You’re Hoseok hyung’s Y/n,” you notice a shift in his tone to a very gentle one. “Of course I know you, he talks so much about you, I already recognised you the moment I saw you, I just can’t believe I’m actually seeing you for real.”

“I don’t understand-”

The pair of you are interrupted when this time, the real Jungkook appears in your sight and whispers something to Jimin. And by the look on Jimin’s face, you doubt it’s good news when he, “Y/n, I’ll explain later but trust me and follow Jungkook!”

Before you could utter anything, Jimin leaves you and you’re left to follow the real Jungkook who takes you to Hoseok.

“HOSEOK YOU PIECE OF SHIT.” You don’t waste any time to slap the life out of him for leaving you all this time.

“This is Taehyung and Namjoon by the way,” Hoseok introduces Taehyung and another tall handsome man smiling at you, revealing his alluring dimples. You smile back at the two whilst doing the opposite with Hoseok. “I can’t believe you left me alone there, I’M NEVER GOING WITH YOU ANYWHERE EVER AGAIN!”

“Well I mean your greed for food dragged you here, not me,” he jokes while the other boys chuckle.

“Really? Really Hoseok?”

“Okay fine, I was just trying to help a friend out,” Hoseok expresses.

“What friend?”

So this friend of Hoseok that Hoseok tried to help that night to the point that he even left you, was no other than Park Jimin.

Apparently, this friend of his has had a crush on you ever since Hoseok started talking about you to his friends and the more Jimin heard, the more he wanted to personally get to know you better. When he saw you, you were indeed much prettier than he saw in the picture of you and Hoseok together.

It’s been months since that event occurred when you last saw Hoseok or any of his friends, even Jimin.

Nonetheless, Park Jimin has been sending letters to you through owls while you reply through muggle mails. Surprisingly enough, Jimin isn’t as cocky as he may have given the impression of when you first met. In fact, he’s very bright, friendly, playful and definitely charming like even he himself said to you once.

You cannot help it but fall deeper and deeper for a guy that you barely see and only met once while talking to each other through mails.

You sigh after finishing washing off the dishes and shake your hands one last time on the sink before a pair hands abruptly grasp around your waist and spin you around to face the person.

“Jim-”

He doesn’t even let you finish before slamming his plump lips onto yours as he simultaneously holds you, placing you on top of the counter.

Allowing himself to stand in between your thighs, he breaks off the kiss just to say, “I’m not leaving this unfinished like our dance.”

And he kisses you again.

[ourmanifestoisfun]

4x03 Episode Thoughts

All right! New episode review, kind of late, whoops!

As always, a ton of stuff happened, but first and foremost:

CALLED THAT THERE WOULD BE A WEDDING!

...did not expect it to be this soon, but that’s the show. Now onwards!

So it’s just gonna be the last line of the theme song that will change. Interesting!

I thought for sure they would change the Rebecca montage.

Tapeworms are serious business. Yech.

I had such a hard time watching the Whitefeather (sorry, MountainTop) scenes. augksflgjdkshfdjks

Darryl pls come back. That’s gonna help a lot

JIM! I’ve always loved him, and everything about his number is so freaking perfect, not just as a parody, but with the pink suit, the dancing and the beat. It’s so catchy. God, I loved all of that and I hope he keeps showing up. Also: he has a last name! Something Hector still doesn’t have.

Things Hector now has: health insurance and a marriage certificate.

Hector is married. 

Let me emphasize this: “Pull Out Hector” is married!

And still no last name.

Honestly, him and Heather getting married at the courthouse on their lunch break. That is very them. 

But I also love that Hector has been thinking about getting married for some time, and Heather deciding that they will have a true wedding is just super sweet and she looked so beautiful in her dress. That was just a lovely sequence, when the doors opened to reveal her standing there.

Him tearing up when Father Brah hands him the tux. Oh my heart.

Of course Valencia is determined to plan their wedding

“I just care about Hector and his happiness. Right, I can’t say that with a straight face.” Oh Valencia

Also that they needed a hot couple on their website.

“Some people should legally not be allowed to get married.” Oh Valencia

Bethhhhhh

Are they gonna be next? :D

Josh and Rebecca’s dynamic this whole episode actually made me very happy. Having Rebecca acknowledge everything she has ever done to him was wrong is super necessary.

Truthfully, one thing I’ve missed since season 1 is having Josh/Rebecca encouraging each other, and it’s so nice that it’s now in earnest, with everything out on the table.

“Ha. Once I loved you” oh Rebecca. I mean, it’s true, but still. You are a snob.

And Josh is doing so well! I’m so happy that therapy is already having benefits for him to be reflective and find out what he wants from life. 

I still found it kind of endearing that he tried to learn about art history for his date.

I was so annoyed at that girl for calling him crazy for being in therapy

...Though the bit about Hector’s mom playing a larger role in his life is interesting. Glad Dr Akopian is doing good work.

...Is he wearing Hector’s old sweatshirt at the end there?

Speaking of, I like that Dr Akopian seems to be having better sessions with Rebecca, that aren’t hair-tearingly bad.

I’m torn in regards to Rebecca opening a pretzel shop. They have used pretzels as a motif throughout the series, and it almost seems the same as chasing Josh Chan cross-country.

...except, on the other hand, she does work there for a little bit, and tries out different flavors, and finds out she likes doing it. So there is more thought being put into this venture already.

And she is still volunteering at the women’s prison. I’d be more eh about this switch if she didn’t still have that. Because she is good at law and does get a sense of accomplishment from it.

That being said, the montage of her complaining about work is pretty extensive...

And they made it explicit that Rebecca isn’t destiny-oriented anymore, so this is a known and considered choice that she is making, for good or ill.

Basically, while I think this will probably be fulfilling for her, it feels a little more like a stepping stone than an endpoint for her, careerwise. So we shall see.

“Our Twisted Fate” was pretty damn weird. But I enjoyed it!

I would not have known that it was a Simon and Garfunkel parody if I hadn’t heard the “Sound of Silence” cover by Disturbed a couple of months ago and went looking for the original.

Weird is normal for this show, anyways

Loved the callback with the blue dress and blazer, and how the cut and materials have changed.

I can’t wait to see the costume writeups after the show has wrapped.

Dude, Nathaniel. You are not okay. At all. 

They were not kidding when they said that he was going to be in a mental place like Season One Rebecca

Please crash and burn quickly so that you can be on your own path to happiness ASAP, because this hurts my heart.

One thing I really don’t want is for CEB!Nathaniel to last throughout all of season 4. I do want him to also understand what he’s looking for to be happy, and I do think the showrunners will have him in a better place overall by the end, I really do want to see more episodes of him getting therapy than just crashing and flailing.

I am at that stage with this show where I kind of want to smoosh everyone together and tell them to all be friends and just be happy.

[samingtonwilson]

Marriage Material - Part 10 - Jim Kirk

Part 1 / Part 2 / Part 3 / Part 4 / Part 5 / Part 6 / Part 7 / Part 8 / Part 9

Summary: in this chapter, the lollipop flavor debacle is settled.

Warnings: language

A/N: happy 1 day late star trek day, friends :))

You were staring at each other. Lying on your sides, face one another, your eyes just focusing on the irises of the other. He was smiling, just a little in that small, sweet way that always made you feel heard, made you feel cared for. You hoped the smile you wore wasn’t too much, wasn’t too revealing of the hammering in your chest and the utter disarray in your head.

He lifted his hand, his fingers centimeters from your jaw before he paused. When you glanced up, he closed the distance and let his fingertips trace your jaw, the curve of your ear, the rise of your cheekbone, the slope of your nose. He sighed as he stared at you, letting his fingers tangle through your hair. “I hate orange lollipops.”

You turned your face to laugh into the pillow. “What?”

“Yeah,” he continued, smiling wider when you turned your head only enough to let one eye meet his. “Partial to green apple, sometimes lime. Anything green.”

“Except vegetables.”

“Except vegetables,” he agreed with a single nod, sighing out when he saw both of your eyes.

“Why did you keep taking the orange ones?” you asked, pushing at his shoulder and ignoring the feeling in your stomach the moment his fingers wrapped around your wrist and pulled you closer. “It’s not like you had to. It was a bribe for your benefit.”

“I didn’t need a bribe.”

“Len said—”

“I’m a difficult patient, I know that,” he interjected, struggling against a frown when you took your hand from his. “I hate hypos, and physicals, and getting my blood drawn. Bedside manner doesn’t come naturally to Bones, he needs the aid of unnecessarily sugary things. He had run through every flavor by the time you transferred on board, except orange. Had a full set of jars of orange.”

“You couldn’t have said something?”

He shook his head. “Like I said, I didn’t need a bribe— you’ve got good bedside manner. And I’d take any flavor of lollipop if it was you giving it to me.”

You snorted, pushing at his bare chest before turning onto your back. “Stop flirting with me, I already had sex with you.”

“Four times,” he added, smirking.

“Four times,” you sighed out, your eyes shutting for a second as if you could relive the toe-curling, hair-raising, moan-inducing blissful feeling.

When you opened your eyes again, he was staring at you in amusement. You cleared your throat. “If you brag about this to anyone, I swear, —”

“Brag about what, starlight? That, four times tonight, I’ve made you co—”

“Yes, that,” you said, shaking your head. “Is that, like, a record for you, Jim?”

He followed the slope of your nose with his eyes this time, following it to the swell of your lips. His gaze lingered there for too long— on the swelling, the darkening. “Yeah, actually.”

You narrowed your eyes, turning your face to look at him while still laying on your back. “Keep your ego in check when I say this, but I find that very hard to believe.”

“Am I that good?” the smugness in his voice irritated you, the smile over his lips even worse.

You reluctantly nodded, wishing you could wipe the smile from his face just for a second. “You’re also just that sexually active.”

“And you thought this would inflate my ego?”

You laughed, shaking your head. You lifted your arm and set your palm against your forehead, holding your hair back. “I thought the first part would, I can’t vouch for the second. Although, there is nothing wrong with being sexually active— I mean, so long as it’s safe, and consensual, and so, so good.”

“Yeah, that,” he pointed at you, referring to the soft moan in your voice, “that’s inflating my ego.”

You rolled your eyes. “You know, you could say something nice about me, too. That wasn’t all you, there was another person involved.”

He nodded, looking at you as if he had tunnel vision and everything around him was dark and quiet and invisible. There was a lot he wanted to say to you— a lot of nice things, a lot of loving things. But he’d been keeping those things to himself since the moment he’d kissed you hours before.

It was better than he thought it would be— the feeling of being buried in you, the feeling of being wrapped in you, the feeling of finally pressing his lips to you. He thought it was funny that everything Leonard told him was true— that sex was better when you were in love, that it was more powerful, more intoxicating than he’d ever felt sex be, than he ever thought it could be.

He actually wanted to laugh at himself for it. He hated that he sounded like some cheesy romance novel or some poem written by a mediocre lovesick Renaissance sonnet aficionado that had just defied the village traditions to have sex with the only person that had survived the previous month’s common cold. He thought it was hilarious, and corny, and totally unexpected.

But he hated more that you weren’t with him on it, that you’d decided this was a just-sex thing and every gesture of yours was empty and not meant to be thought of as something deeper— words he never thought were ugly until you said them. But you had an act to keep up and you didn’t want him to think the act was a reflection of your actual feelings, feelings you said you had no interest in augmenting for reasons your throat had grown sore of repeating.

Despite the anger and self-loathing it all caused, it was easy for him to agree. As self-destructive as it was, he agreed without a second thought. If he could see you unravel under him— or on top of him, for that matter— every night, if he could be the reason you moaned out and sighed out his name, if he could make your eyes shut in bliss, he wanted to do that. It didn’t matter what it made him feel, all that mattered to him was you— the person he married while drunk off his mind, the person he’d stay married to for the rest of time if he had any say in it.

“You’re okay, I guess.”

A scoff and a slap of offense against his chest, you sat up and took the sheet with you, holding it under your upper arms so you were comfortably covered. Your back sat against the headboard and you set your foot flat against the mattress so your knee formed a small peak before your chest. “I’m better than okay. I have references that can corroborate my claim.”

“Have I ever met any of these references?” he asked, climbing out of the bed and not caring that his entire naked body was brightly on display— you knew if you were in his shoes you would’ve done the same, you would’ve never put clothes on if you were in his shoes. “Come to think of it, I’ve never heard anything about you and anyone on board.”

You shook your head, looking away when he caught you gawking with your bottom lip between your teeth— he smirked in reaction. “I keep it in my pants until leave— usually meet someone on the starbases. I’ve never dated anyone on board, never slept with anyone on board either. ”

“Until now.”

You hummed, catching the t-shirt he tossed you. “I’m breaking a lot of rules for you, zuji.”

“That was—”

“Arabic.”

He frowned in consideration, nodding a moment later. “And you know all of these languages, how?”

“Have you met me?” you asked once the shirt was on and you slipped out of the bed to stand on still unstable legs. “Encyclopedic knowledge is, like, my thing. Everything I am is basically a qualification to get transferred onto this damn ship— weirdly intelligent, emotionally messed up, oddly good-looking.”

He nodded. “The superficial qualifications are the ones we put the most weight on.”

“Honestly, I wouldn’t be surprised if that was true.” You caught the pair of leggings you motioned for him to toss to you, pulling them on and rolling your sleeves up to your elbows. “Are you hungry? We never ate dinner.”

He hummed. “I’ll do that. What do you want to—”

There was a knock at the door that cut him off. It was a double knock— two very quick, very forceful knocks with barely any pause in between.

You tilted your head and looked at Jim. “You expecting someone?”

He frowned and shook his head. “It’s, like, two AM—”

Two more knocks cut him off.

You inhaled deeply and brushed past him, purposely bumping your shoulder against his with an added exaggerated sigh of mock effort.

He smiled, catching your arm before you could walk away entirely. “Let’s go again. One more time.”

Another knock had you taking your arm back and clicking your tongue as you patted his cheek. “Patience, sunshine.”

He watched as you fussed with your hair and strolled to the door, hitting your hand against the control panel and standing back with your arms crossed over your chest.

Your eyes widened when the door opened entirely, suddenly wishing your eyeliner hadn’t smudged off and your lips didn’t look so freshly bitten. You cleared your throat and frowned at her. “Yes?”

Her eyes were wide as well, the brown, almond shaped eyes that were so flawlessly lined trailing over your body. Her hair was loose, long, dark strands falling before her face to soften her sharp bone structure. She wasn’t wearing her red uniform dress, now in a comfortable outfit you knew she would usually sleep in. “Can we— I want us to talk.”

“Are you going to yell at me more?” you asked, peering at Jim, who watched you with a single eyebrow raised. You were thankful he’d put a shirt on— mostly so you could stay focused.

She shook her head, her eyes glassy. “No, I just want to talk.”

You uncrossed your arms and stepped back, your frown softening and your eyebrows returning to a neutral position. “Yeah, Ny, come in.”

She nodded and walked inside, glancing at Jim and waving a little. “Captain.”

He nodded back, pointing at the door that you had yet to move from. “I’m gonna— I’ll go find Bones, give you guys your privacy.”

He decided to forgo shoes once again, nearing the door but pausing to press his lips to your forehead. “Good luck, starlight,” he whispered so only you could hear, stepping out into the corridor with the door shutting behind him.

You looked at the door for a few seconds, shaking your head and turning back to Uhura.

She was watching you, her head slightly tilted. “This is different.”

You nodded, motioning to the sofa. “Sit. I have a feeling this’ll take some time.”

She complied easily, taking a seat and pulling her legs onto the couch as well. She kept her knees at her chest, her fingers set on top.

It was strange seeing her like this. Usually exuding confidence, she sat before you in a nervous, unsure manner that confused you and made you want to hug her and never let go.

“So what’d you want to—”

“You got married,” she said, her eyes narrowing as she stared at her hands. When she met your gaze, her eyes narrowed further. “You got married to Kirk and you didn’t think to tell me.”

“It was a spur of the moment thing, Ny. I didn’t plan on marrying him.”

“I didn’t even know you were dating,” she continued, setting her feet on the ground and crossing her legs at the knee instead. “You didn’t think to tell me that either.”

“I just—” you shook your head and wished you’d taken those improv classes offered a mile from your childhood home that your father tried to force you into. “It wasn’t supposed to be serious. It was just hooking up, but he’s so— God, he’s so great and, I don’t know, I guess I— I guess I fell in love with him.”

You knew you weren’t lying. You just wished you were.

“He asked me to marry him and, ten minutes later, we got married,” you told her, sighing and slouching in your spot on the couch. “I couldn’t tell you then— I didn’t have my communicator on me and I didn’t think to make the walk back to Chekov’s.”

“What about after?” she asked, seemingly following every bit of your features with her eyes. “I found out from Spock, (Y/N). He’s not even in touch with gossip, he thinks it’s too futile and that Vulcans are above it.”

“He saw the forms,” you shrugged.

“I should’ve known before Starfleet officials did.” She sighed and shook her head, sniffling. “I love you and I love Kirk— I want the two of you to be blindingly happy. Did you think I would judge you? Or that I’d be jealous or unhappy?”

You shook your head. “Of course not. I just thought you’d— Actually, I don’t know. I didn’t think, I was so caught up in all of it. It was so much. I married Jim Kirk. I stood up,” you assumed, you could have been sitting for all you knew, “in front of random strangers and married Jim Kirk. The part of me that started lusting after him the minute I met him was having a field day but every other part was so scared,” you assumed again. “I mean, marriage isn’t— I’m not marriage material.”

“Jim thinks you are,” she argued softly, smiling at you a little when you met her gaze. “I wanted to be there for you. If I was there, maybe I could have made it all a little less overwhelming for you, maybe I could have helped. But you didn’t give me that chance, even the day after.”

You nodded. “I know. I’m sorry. I know I do stupid things like this— keep important things to myself, talk about random things when I should talk about the significant things. I’m sorry, Nyota. I’m really sorry.”

She nodded back. “Why didn’t you say that sooner? It’s been a month.”

“Life after marriage to Jim Kirk is,” you clicked your tongue and shook your head, “it’s something else. He’s— He’s something else.”

“He’s been acting like something else recently. Always happy, always smiling. It’s like serving under the sun,” she laughed with a single shake of her head.

“I missed you. I missed you a lot.”

Her smile was close-lipped but not small by any means. “I missed you.”

“We’re okay, right? You and I? I have you in my corner again?”

She shook her head again. “You’ve always had me in your corner.” She then wrinkled her nose. “Fuck, that was corny.”

“It was,” you laughed. “But it was sweet.”

She leant towards you, nodding her head pointedly toward the mess that was the bed— sheets tangled, a few pillows on the floor, comforter piled on top of it. “He really as good as they all say he is?”

You laughed through your nose, nodding. “Even better, actually.”

She nodded, sitting back once more. “I thought that would be the case. With the way he looks at you, I’m surprised you’re not stuck in here with him all day.” She tilted her head. “Come to think of it, he’s always looked at you like that. S’a wonder I didn’t catch onto your little charade sooner.”

You tried to laugh again, smiling at her. “Yeah, weird.”

PART 11

lil tag list: (tell me if you’d like to be tagged): @feelmyroarrrr @to-pick-ourselves-up-7@star-trekkin-across-theuniverse @webhoard @dirajunara @the-space-goddess-16@whiteandblackkeys @sugarshai @goodnightwife @anyakinamidala @iwillstaywiththemforever @majisean @bbparker @heyjess-marie @kirkaholic123@thepjofanqueen@buckybuckling @da1120 @dudahmautner @purelittleblueberry @insposcollective @our-chaoticwhispers @procrastinace

[cyrano2021dirjoewright]

boy i’m about to do it... @pikeisaman asked me for a gobblepot outline of how they progress through the show and i have nothing better to do so here we go

season 1

literally from the pilot their fates are sealed and it's clear that they and this city will always be a part of each other’s lives. gordon is a babyfaced war hero cop determined to make this city better. oswald is a lowly umbrella boy  to a mafiosa (fish....my love) who snitches to the cops about the wayne murder case to further his own status. jim is ordered by mob boss falcone to take oswald to the end of the pier and shoot him for snitching. instead he lets him live, telling him to never come back to gotham. well...he definitely does come back with a master plan and shows up on jim’s doorstep (scaring the living shit out of him!!) explaining that he wants to help jim because he’s the last good man in gotham. part of oswald’s plan is telling his new employer maroni about what happened, the dude forces jim to come to his aid and corroborate the story and i tell you. the look in oswald’s eyes as he silently thanks jim for saving his life yet again...is what started my descent into this madness.

so eventually it’s revealed that oswald is alive and there’s all this mob bullshit but what’s important to this post is that when oswald waiting for his fate from falcone, he begged that the job of killing him be given to jim because he knew he’s the only good man in this city with a conscious who would spare his life. and he was right and in return he now secretly works for falcone and pleads for him to spare jim’s life when he gets out of line (which to THIS DAY jim does know about and it pisses me off!!!!)

anyways down the line jim finally comes to oswald for his first of many favors down the line because the city and the gcpd are corrupt and oswald is literally SO HAPPY like he’s been waiting for this moment and so have i because before this point this was the basis of so many fics for them. “FAVOR IS DONE..FRIENDS DON’T OWE FRIENDS, SILLY” this is actual dialogue that haunts me to this day

but then of course oswald’s promise of “no one gets hurt” doesn’t bode so well and jim is like [gob voice] i’ve made a huge mistake so the next time he sees oswald he’s a raging douche to him and from there on out. said interaction is what i call the first gobblepot breakup scene. oswald is opening his new club and comes to the gcpd to hand deliver an opening party invitation to jim with an earnest look in his eyes that parallels asking your crush to prom. jim says no and says he doesn’t want oswald coming to his work and THROWS THE INVITATION IN THE GARBAGE. Oswald urges that jim shouldn’t treat him this way because one day he’ll come back to him because THEY NEED EACH OTHER AND JIM IS A DUMBASS FOR NOT YET REALIZING THIS.

So literally like four episodes later jim DOES need oswald’s help and they road trip it up to this cabin and jim saves his life yet again but cuts Oswald off before he can thank him for it. A few eps later he comes AGAIN for a favor and when Oswald fucks with him he literally GRABS HIM by the shirt with empty threats. This boy just loves grabbing other men and pulling their faces within inches of each other while looking all macho. I tell you. But yeah Oswald still does the favor and says jim owes him this time (we’re past “friends don’t owe friends” since jim rejected jim)

Then somehow in the s1 finale jim’s idea of a favor is threatening to leave Oswald to be killed by mobsters in a hospital and Oswald has to wit his way out of things and have jim take him with him but like….this is the first time you see in oswald’s face that he was wrong to trust jim and it’s so goddamn heartbreaking.  

SEASON 2

Jim has been demoted because he told the mayor to kiss his ass among other unruly things and he goes to Oswald (who is now “king of gotham”) to get his job back. Oswald agrees if jim shakes down this dude who owes him money. Jim ends up killing the guy in self defense and feels shitty but Oswald keeps his word and gets jim his job back. Meanwhile gcpd has a new captain because the writers hate women of color and killed off Essen so now Michael chikilis is here and is the most aggressive by-the-book dude you’ve ever seen. He’s like “yo if anyone here is corrupt and idk likes to fuck with skinny gay emo criminals for favors I’ll fire you” so jim is like :o when chiklis announces they’re going after Oswald jim goes to warn him and ask him about shit going down because it doesn’t sound like something Oswald would do (he’s actually being forced to do it because his mom is being held hostage). Instead of telling jim what’s wrong he snaps at him and this is breakup scene 2.0 basically. These boys love the angst. 

So oswald’s poor mom gets murdered by this dude named galavan who’s taking over the city and he’s trying to make it seem like Oswald is doing all this shit and jim is like “Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm” and galavan is elected mayor and Oswald wants to crash his party to fuckin murder him him. Jim for some reason is protecting this asshole because I guess it’s his job or something. This turns into jim standing between Oswald and galavan, both with guns drawn on each other. Neither can pull the trigger on each other. If this were literally any other person Oswald would just gun down whoever was in between him and justice for his murdered mom. But it’s jim. So instead he pleads and cries for him to step aside and jim implies that he can’t even though he knows galavan is guilty but it’s this dumb cop code or something. The writers decided at this point that instead of us getting to see who would back down first, Oswald is shot in the shoulder by someone else and goes into hiding and recovery. 

Them boys meet up again because galavan goes to trial and accuses Oswald of all the shit he did and jim’s like “WHY THE FUCK YOU LYIN” in the middle of court so he’s taken away by galavan’s men and they gonna kill him but then OSWALD APPEARS because theses dudes are like addicted to saving each other’s lives at this point. Jim wakes up with Oswald being there like “hello please help me kill this douche” and jim agrees. Some bullshit happens in between but what’s important is that they…literally….kill a man together. Like if nothing else that they’ve done for each other so far didn’t seal this connection, this did. 

And then even jim is technically the one who pulled the trigger on the bullet that killed galavan, Oswald takes the full blame and goes to arkham asylum for it. He goes through the worst mental torture imaginable for jim. When he sees jim on site and pleads for him to get him out jim is a Dick and claims this therapy is for his own good and it’s honestly so painful to watch like this is the last shred of hope Oswald had for jim.

A lot of this later half of s2 they’re doing their own thing and jim goes to jail and Oswald finds his rich dad who gets murdered in front of him but later on Galavan comes back to life and Oswald kills him again just as the dude was about to kill jim so oswald’s just like “you’re welcome bye”

SEASON 3

Jim and Oswald greet each other like bitter exes at the gcpp when Oswald asks jim (who is now a bounty hunter) why he hasn’t caught fish mooney and jim says “you haven’t made it worth my while”. He does eventually help catch her by calling Oswald (guess they just still have each other’s numbers) and telling Oswald where she’ll be.

They don’t interact for a while this season but at one point when jim is put on a hallucinogenic trip he has a vision that he’s fighting a war with Oswald and Oswald saves his life in the dream and tells him “never leave your unit behind.” They literally never explain this on the show but I assume it’s about jim’s guilt for leaving him at arkham.

So then waaaay later on Oswald shows up on jim’s doorstep asking for information on Edward nygma and gives jim a phone with only his number on it, which becomes useful to jim when he’s held hostage and calls Oswald for help. Oswald like Bernie sanders runs to the place and saves jim yet again. Instead of thanking him jim is once again an asshole and says “took you long enough”

So then the s3 finale. I have never been more stressed in my life. Jim has been infected with this virus that makes you basically a violent douche with no inhibitions so he’s battling those demons and accidentally kills fish mooney in the process (Oswald actually likes her this time so he mad) and then is ready to offer Oswald up to save the city. Oswald ain’t happy about this, but only finds out at the last minute that jim is infected with the virus so idk how that affects his opinion on jim’s actions here 

SEASON 4

Oswald has time for NO ONE his emotions have already gotten him nearly killed multiple times. He runs gotham and jim doesn’t like it. They keep publicly arguing with reporters and photographers documenting this gay shit. Even though they apparently hate each other they can’t get through an interaction without grabbing the other and bringing their faces within inches of each other to make empty threats. I’m told they will team up again later in the season which Gives Me Hope because both actors have said from day one that their destinies are forever intertwined. These boys are never escaping each other. 

So yeah that’s as far as an outline goes, I can go even further if you want more meta and headcanons 

[wrestlingisfake]

Takeover: WarGames preview

Eric Young & Alexander Wolfe & Killian Dain vs. Adam Cole & Bobby Fish & Kyle O’Reilly vs. Roderick Strong & Akam & Rezar - This is a three-way contest and the first official WarGames match since 2000.  Young and Wolfe are the NXT tag team champions, but the title is not at stake.

WarGames was introduced by Jim Crockett Promotions in 1987, the year before the company rebranded as WCW.  Since acquiring WCW in 2001, WWE has appeared reluctant to utilize the WarGames concept, which has added to the mystique surrounding it.  As originally conceived, WarGames occurs in two rings surrounded by a single steel cage (with a roof), and features two teams of five.  One wrestler from each team would start inside the cage, and the remaining wrestlers would enter the cage one-by-one, at regularly scheduled intervals.  The match could only end once everyone was locked inside the cage, and the only way to win was by submission.  WCW tinkered with the format in the late 1990s (including a three-way in 1998 similar to this one), and NXT will implement some changes of its own.

For this match, there will be two rings inside a single cage, without a top.  Three men will start the match--one from each team--while the others will be locked inside shark cages along the entryway between the stage and ringside.  After five minutes, the remaining members of a team will enter the match, so it’ll effectively be 3-on-1-on-1.  Then three minutes later it’ll be 3-on-3-on-1.  Three minutes after that the last of the wrestlers will enter the match to make it 3-on-3-on-3.  After that, whoever scores the pinfall or submission on any opponent will win the match for his team.  The manner in which order of entry will be determined has not been announced, and may be (in kayfabe) randomized.

Young’s Sanity faction has been picking fights with virtually everyone in NXT, but over the summer they were especially focused on separate feuds with Roderick Strong and the Authors of Pain (Akam and Rezar).  After Young and Wolfe won the tag title from the AoP in August, Fish and O’Reilly attacked both teams; later in the same show Fish and O’Reilly revealed an alliance with Adam Cole that came to be called The Undisputed Era.  The Era tried to recruit Strong but he turned them down, effectively putting him on the same side as the Authors of Pain in a three-way war.

The psychology of WarGames in general, and this match in particular, is the drama of keeping the babyface team at a crucial disadvantage.  One guy in this match is going to be completely isolated from both of his partners for at least 11 minutes.  It feels like that is specifically designed for Strong to play face-in-peril until the Authors of Pain simultaneously enter the match to run wild on everybody.  Beyond that, the match should just be a colossal trainwreck of styles--the Era’s indy-riffic wrestling, Sanity’s wild brawling, the AoP’s mean-guy power moves, and Strong suffering for your sins.

It’s absolutely bonkers that this is the first big match for Adam Cole since his long-long-long-awaited NXT debut, and I’ve barely gotten around to mentioning him.  That’s how nuts this match is.  I’ve watched some of Cole here and there in ROH and I’ve never been that taken with the guy, but I can’t deny he’s really won over the kinds of fans who have propelled other stars from the indies to NXT to world titles.  I’ll be looking to see what he’s got, and it’ll be especially impressive if he can manage to stand out amid all the chaos around him.  It’s tough to predict a finish, but in lieu of an educated guess you have to figure Cole will be put over build to an NXT title shot.

Drew McIntyre vs. Andrade Almas - McIntyre defends the NXT championship.  The logical direction for Drew is a title match with Adam Cole (who debuted right after he won the title, and beat him up), but that’ll have to wait so Almas gets the shot this time around.

Almas was a big deal as La Sombra in CMLL, and when he was considered a pretty big acquisition when WWE signed him in 2015.  But things didn’t click, and he started sliding down the card.  NXT has cleverly turned that into an angle where Zelina Vega debuted as a business advisor that got him back on track.  It would have been real easy to turn this into a joke, or a retread of Rusev/Lana or Mike Bennett/Maria Kanellis.  But I’m impressed with how they’ve presented Vega, and she really adds something that was missing from Almas’s act.

I could buy Almas winning here, but a title run for him would get in the way of whatever they’ve got in mind for Adam Cole, and I suspect Cole is the priority for NXT heading into 2018.  In fact, I could easily see WWE rushing Almas and Vega to the main roster soon, and that would only increase the odds of him losing here.  There is at least a possibility that Almas could win the title and trade it back and forth with McIntyre, but I wouldn’t count on it.  Drew retains.

Ember Moon vs. Kairi Sane vs. Nikki Cross vs. Peyton Royce - This is a four-way match for the NXT women’s title, which Asuka vacated to go to Raw.  There are no count-outs or disqualifications, and all four women can be in the ring at the same time.  Whoever scores the first pinfall or submission on any other opponent will be the new champion.

Sane earned the first spot in this match by winning the Mae Young Classic tournament.  Royce defeated Cross and Liv Morgan in a three-way to qualify, and Moon defeated Ruby Riot and Sonya Deville in a three-way of her own.  Cross won a battle royal to earn the last slot.

Of the four, Sane has to be considered the favorite. You hear that WWE just signed a cute strong-style lady from Japan and you figure it’ll be Asuka all over again, so there’s a lot of pressure for her to both live up to those expectations and to chart her own course.  The other three women suffer from the flipside of Asuka’s legendary win streak--if WWE was ever really going to get behind any of them, one of them would have snapped Asuka’s streak instead of losing over and over and then waving bye-bye as she left.  For Moon or Cross or Royce, a title win at Sane’s expense would be a step in the right direction, but it could be too little too late.

I kinda want to see Moon or Cross get the belt, but I haven’t seen much of Sane so I’m hoping to get a showcase of her performance.  Pretty sure Kairi’s gonna win.

Aleister Black vs. The Velveteen Dream - Velveteen’s gimmick is that he’s Prince, basically.  Black’s gimmick is that he’s a big mean wrestler who could most likely kick Prince’s ass.  I don’t think Velveteen thought this through.

I first saw the Velveteen Dream in Chicago in what I think was his debut with the character.  Everybody was booing him because...I don’t know why.  I think he’s great.  He’s gonna die pretty bad though.

Kassius Ohno vs. Lars Sullivan - I forgot these two existed.  I guess Sullivan has been clubbering people and Ohno thinks that’s mean, and also Ohno is trying to prove he’s still relevant.  That feels like a recipe for Sullivan clubbering Ohno and winning the match.