#i'd like to think that I've made an impact on at least one person during my time here

[hopefull-mindset]

I've started reading The Great Gatsby (I've fallen into the reading classical literature trap 😔. I really need to finish Crime and Punishment.)

Anyhow I think it's really interesting how Asagiri chose to characterize many of the people in BSD. Especially after learning that irl Fitzgerald was more of a cynical person (at least towards the end of his life) than his animated counterpart. And it made me think of all the other characters of the show and how their characterized.

What was Asagiri's purpose as he came together with these characters? Why'd he have some characters act as their irl counterparts while others act more like the characters they wrote or people in their lives?

These aren't really questions that I wanted the answers to they were moreso just thoughts that I had. I'd love to have a peek into this man's mind and how it works

I think a lot of us have fallen into that trap LMAO. This is my favorite topic though. I could talk about this forever because Kafka Asagiri is an interesting person who has integrated a lot of literature into this one series. I don't know what goes on in this man’s mind and I know these aren't literal questions, but I am interested in sharing what I know!

As you've pointed out, some characters do act more like the people in these works written by them than the actual people. BSD isn't purely just taking these authors, their relationships, and then implementing them just like that. it also takes these authors’ literary personas, their impact socially, and their works to make them into who they are. Asagiri is doing this because it makes it more interesting, but also imagine writing about this authors where most of them lived depressing lives with qualities that don’t make uh, the type of story you want to tell.

I’m impressed with how creative he is.

I’m trying to limit myself on how much I should talk about this, but I fear that I’ll leave out important bits about how Asagiri incorporates these people into the work. I’m also just jittering and excited. Like I almost forgot to bring up the fact the reason BSD has a war narrative is because it takes Japanese authors from Meiji to Shōwa era, so about the time Western influence kicked in, forcing them to modernize and keep up with the rest of the world during what is a fairly short time for huge development like this, to post-war Japan where, you know, the Occupation of Japan is happening and they have to intake the traumatic repercussions of everything before that.

This can make The Great War functionally WW2, but obviously not a one to one match. I’m not a historian or anything, but this should come to mind for anyone who’s in the know about some Japanese history. Now that I’m bringing it up though, Mori’s attitude during the flashback with Yosano is put into context because he pretty much says himself that he needs his country to realize that they keep up with the rest of the world and that the battlefield is changing, and real life Japan did not care about how they did that.

With N, Chuuya, and Stormbringer too. I’m almost hesitant to bring this up because it’s so serious, but yes, Japan did do lethal human experimentation for that same purpose to keep up with the rest of the world and prove themselves.

Ahh, I went off track. Sorry, we were talking about how Asagiri writes characters, right? There is a lot of crossover between the real authors and their writing, so it’s sorta hard to tell with people like Dazai where the work influence ends and the the real person begins.

For me currently in my classic lit research period, I’m almost upset at myself for barley reading anything by Ryuunosuke Akutagawa because he’s my favorite character. I’ve just been so caught up doing my Oda Sakunosuke essay that I don’t have too much time for other authors. I’ve also picked up “The Similitude of Blossoms: A Critical Biography of Izumi Kyōka” recently (and A New Hamlet by Osamu Dazai, but that’s not important).

Ah, how much should I talk about.… hmm… how about Chuuya as an example of Literary Voice vs Real Person…. Lucy Montgomery and Edgar Allen Poe for Social Impact (for Japan specifically)…. and then.. Oh whatever, I’ll figure it out. One day I’ll talk about Kyouka, but not now. I’d feel ill prepared.

If you’ve ever read a poem by Chuuya Nakahara, taken in the emotion and deep feeling, and then found any fun facts about his interactions with other authors, there’s a huge contrast between those two modes that can be jarring. Im sure you can tell how that carries over to BSD. I’m impressed by how Asagiri is able to balance both the brash attitude of Chuuya and the inner literary voice that voices the emotion and care he has in him.

Edgar Allen Poe is slightly more obvious than Lucy’s influence (or maybe it’s Lucy’s, ah it depends), but both pop out at you when it’s pointed out. He was one of the first American authors to be introduced to Japan and fairly popular, but mainly we would point to Edogawa Ranpo as the most blatantly influenced by him and who his name is quite literally attached to. While Lucy Montgomery isn’t attached to anyone in particular, Anne of The Green Gables was wildly distributed in Japan when there were few english children books and became a hit.

There’s a television series too if you search for it. Any redhead, pigtail-braided girl you see in some Japanese media is because of her! It’s probably why these two have the most presence in the story currently compared to other members of the Guild and work with the Agency at times.

There are times when Asagiri will use influences outside of the author’s own catalog to create them, some literary like Albert Camus’s The Stranger and The Myth of Sisyphus (in writing characters like Dazai or Fyodor, I could make a post about that), and some just of his own anime/manga interests in other series like Jojo, Cowboy Bebop, Black Lagoon, etc. if you’re familiar.

I’d feel bad if I don’t at least show one example of this so, how about an Odasaku example with The Long Goodbye by Reymond Chandler? I was going to avoid talking about him until the essay, but I can’t help myself. Many have pointed out these parallels before, but Asagiri did point it to be his favorite book last year in an interview.

If you’ve noticed that the presentation for Dark Era in the anime comes off like a Noir film just like how Untold Origins came off like a black and white samurai film, good job! The Long Goodbye is a Noir novel about a detective named Phillip Marlowe who is unable to let go of a case involving a friend that was accused of murdering his own wife, but supposedly commits suicide and confesses to it before Marlowe is able to leave custody. By the end of the book, he uncovers the real perpetuator (a past lover of Terry Lennox’s before he was ever called by that name) and finds out where Lennox really is by poking into the story of where the message he got was sent.

He comes in with a new look and identity, and he asks if it’s too early for a gimlet. They say their last few words to each other, Marlowe flipping back and forth from acknowledging him as Terry Lennox and as a person he never knew, and then Marlowe tells him that “he’s not here anymore”. Marlowe had already told him goodbye when it was sad and lonely, so Lennox does the same here. That ends that mutual, long goodbye and he never sees Lennox again.

The immediate response I’ve see about this is how it parallels the relationship between Dazai and Odasaku. In The Day I Picked Up Dazai, just like how Marlowe brings him to his home to clean him up and meet up at the same bar for the next few months of their friendship, Odasaku also does so with Dazai and drinks a Gimlet for reasons he doesn’t know. In reality, Gimlets are a representation of the friendship between Marlowe and Lennox as it’s Lennox’s favorite drink. It makes it a little painful when Marlowe ignores him when he ask to go get a gimlet at that same bar they always went.

BEAST is more hyper specific about it by having Dazai ask the same question that Lennox asks when he gets smoked out and Odasaku asking for a gimlet with no bitters, which is specifically how Lennox takes it. Odasaku does not drink the gimlet at all though, showing that there is not friendship to start or accept or say goodbye to, as Lennox does ask Marlowe to drink a Gimlet to say goodbye to him in the letter. Just like TDIPUD is like their beginning, BEAST is their ending without ending because BEAST Dazai is not the same person he was friends with.

Odasaku fulfills being a detective and Dazai is the tragic friend with a past he doesn’t say anything about. Great. Now what I think people are missing when they entirely focus on Odasaku and Dazai when they talk about Lennox and Marlowe is that Lennox is narratively also Andre Gide.

If we were to split Lennox into three people just like his three identities, this is what it would look like:

The Friend: You help him out and don’t judge for his faults, in turn you go out to a bar with each other. It’s uneasy, but it’s worth a lot to the both of you. Eventually you have to part ways in death. (Dazai & Terry Lennox)

The Unknown: Is he someone you know? He acts like it, but he looks nothing like what you’ve encounter before. Maybe in some world you were, but that’s not now and it’s too late for this goodbye to be playing out. You let it happened though and you never see him again when he walks out that door. (BEAST Dazai & “Señor Maioranos”)

The Soldier: The past is right around the corner and its come to bite you in the ass. White hair and war memories haunting him with a scar as a reminder, he’s a reflection of you but maybe not. Who knows? (Andre Gide & “Paul Marston.”)

The initials “P.M.” of both his past name and Phillip Marlowe’s is meant to clue in how Eileen (the past lover) is connected to Lennox by her thinking of Marlowe as her past lover as she attempts to seduce him in some trance. What I’m trying to note here though is that you can take this as Lennox being another reflection of himself. It’s easy to do that reading for both Dazai and Gide as they’re both his foils and are purposely similar, but Gide aligns more with this past identity than Dazai does and retains his white hair.

Uhhh, wasn't planning to make a mini-analysis in the middle of my talking but okay. I'm leaving it off there. I went blank a lot while writing because I didn’t know what I wanted to comment on. There's too much to say about this large cast. I have way more literary fun facts and ideas to say, but nah.

[cupids-chamber]

2023/08/23

I'll be on my way now, I'm closing down all my other blogs and ask bin. I'd prefer if no one reached out to me during this time.

I'll be active on my Wattpad account if I feel like writing from time to time, (I'd also like to finish what I started) I've also made an AO3 account, in case I post anything. I plan on posting my Concubine series & Circus au works there as well.

(More info below the undercut)

Hi! This may come of as a shock, and I try not to get too open on this blog, but a month, or so ago. I posted about how I might have DID. (I did extensive research on DID, and reached out to my cousin who had DID for help, and though I will not self diagnose, I match almost all if not all the symptoms for it.)

This Cupid persona has developed into someone of it's own, and I don't feel like I'm the same person as before, and in all honesty I genuinely don't even know who I'm anymore. It's hard for me to focus on my health and mental health, along side simple tasks and even hobbies like writing which I love.

I will say coming into tumblr, the past two years caused me more harm then good. I've realized that though I came into this app being extremely s*icidal and interacting with the users here have made me feel better about myself. It has caused many negative impacts, and I can confidently say that due to me obsessing over writing on time or everyday for tumblr, I've developed an eating disorder of sorts, and recently it seems my body is rejecting food as a whole.

I love writing, and I love that people enjoy my writing, sadly it's the cause of a lot of health issues, mentally and physically. And though I still write from time to time, recently typing or writing by hand makes me feel awful and it's not like those usual burn outs.

I feel like crying as I'm typing this up, and a lot of people may call me dramatic for this but I genuinely feel a pit in my stomach when I go on this app it's not even funny anymore. This blog itself has caused me so much trouble behind the scenes, and though I'm not quitting. I most certainly can't leave something I've worked so hard on, (and this is the place where I met the few people that honestly may not know it, but probably helped stop me from offing myself.)

Like I said, I'll be on different apps, maybe once every 2 weeks or a month, but I'm trying to avoid social media, trying to pick up new hobbies, trying to gain some sort of stability in my life because I'm not stable enough to handle anything right now but like I said, I love writing and I think you guys should at least see it through on the series and tasks I've started.

I'm crying now, and I'm very grateful that you've all supported my work, and allowed me to explore my writing on this platform, I've learned a lot about this fandom. I still find it ironic that people call me a workaholic, I'm genuinely the biggest procrastinator you'll ever meet.

Thank you for supporting me, because without your support and reassurance, I might not have been here until now. Especially to some of my moots, who took the time to chat with me.

So, this is goodbye I suppose. At least on this platform, maybe not forever, but it is goodbye for the next good while.

— Signing off, cupids-chamber

[poppyandzena]

I've noticed you mentioning that many creators have covered the P&Z stuff, and that many have gotten the details wrong. What would *you* recommend creators focus on? Is there a specific order of events you'd recommend? For context, I'm a trans man in the creator space. Relatively small, but I also have BPD (and many other things) and am polyamorous and I hate how Poppy is playing into all the negative stereotypes. I want to help. Especially because one of Poppy's victims was a very close friend of mine. I'm currently working on a video essay script about the situation. If you, or anyone else wants to reach out, I'd greatly appreciate it, but I'm well aware that everyone's spoons are lacking right now so no pressure.

The main problem is a lack of organization. Many creators think they can gloss over an introduction and then dive into the docs, and most of the misinformation is in that expositional intro. But when you do that, you make yourself and the situation as a whole look less credible.

And, frankly, covering everything Poppy and Zena have done in a single stream will contribute to this unless you are especially dedicated. Luxander spent a LOT of time asking for clarification and organizing its points so that their arguments made sense.

Here's some facts I've noticed streamers get wrong, at least when they first cover it. I'll list them so creators have a cheat sheet:

Poppy is an AMAB transgender woman who has recently undergone bottom surgery. The bottom surgery is important to note as Poppy regards intercourse with Noeh as "her first time." This is her having vaginal intercourse for the first time, which is something she places value in regards to her trans experience. Poppy has used this as emotional leverage to paint Noehflake as a malicious person who took her virginity and left.

-

The entirety of the relationship with Noehflake lasted approximately four months and ended in late December 2023. Poppy wanted Noehflake to move in with her either at or a little under the two month mark. I find this extremely important as it highlights how quickly Poppy tries to enmesh herself into people's lives. I personally think its a combination of typical BPD attatchment issues and lovebombing to speed up the process and "skip steps," something Poppy ironically has called out in other people.

-

Poppy is NOT Spawn (her kid's) biological parent. Poppy was present since Spawn was in utero and took up the role of their father before she transitioned. Spawn's mother died in a horse riding accident at around age 3/4, during which Poppy became their sole caretaker.

-

PLEASE stop headlining your videos with "child abuse." It's inaccurate. As much as I do not like PZ, we have to be correct with how we criticize them. Spawn was not a minor during the time the abuse ocurred. Spawn has also stated PZ have NEVER sexually abused them and that their childhood was relatively fine before Zena arrived. Please stick to what was alleged. Call it "parental abuse" to be accurate, please. Child abuse brings to mind a minor being harmed which is not accurate to this situation.

-

Spawn was NOT coined by Poppy. That's the name Spawn gave themselves so their privacy would be respected, something Poppy purposefully violates online to endager them.

-

Spawn is a 24 year old they/them nonbinary person with POTS, which severely impacts their cardiovascular system and makes labor and even basic tasks difficult. Around 2022 when the brunt of the abuse ocurred, Spawn was around 5ft and 80lbs. They claim a doctor cleared them of health issues in relation to being 80lbs and that it wasn't a weight Poppy and Zena starved them to. I personally find issue with a 5ft person being 80lbs in general and believe it was a contributing factor to their chronic pain, but I do not believe they were at a higher weight and PZ starved them TO that point. I believe they were naturally lithe, but that PZ did absolutely nothing to help manage Spawn's weight as the crux of their abuse was food restriction. According to Spawn, their weight has steadily increased as they've gotten older which I can relate to. Being at that weight puts stress on your body, but to add POTS on top of it significantly disables you.

-

Spawn has autism and a dissociative disorder, the latter of which Poppy has gaslit Spawn into underplaying in spite of a mental health professional agreeing with Spawn. (This is in the Spawn doc) This disorder is OSDD-1B which Spawn met the criteria for (fact checked with Spawn), which is a disorder that is often obtained through significant, persistent, or otherwise intense trauma. This is ESPECIALLY concerning to me as someone who has researched DID and the sister disorders since I was 15. I have a space in my heart reserved for those people as DID is one of the most misunderstood and culturally manipulated disorders since it's "debut" with the book Sybil. I digress, but the fact that Poppy refuses to see eye to eye with Spawns dissociative disorder despite allegedly having one herself is concerning.

-

Poppy alleges she was diagnosed with OSDD, Otherwise Specified Dissociative Disorder. I myself have actually made the mistake of saying she has DID. The two are different, but under the same umbrella. OSDD is sort of the "misc." option when you don't meet the full critera of DID and you don't qualify for psychotic disorders. I actually believe OSDD is more prevalent than classic DID due to the fact that disorders are spectrum-based and can be highly specific to the person if they are traumagenic. People with OSDD tend to have alters like DID, but there is a distinct lack of amnesia between alters and a lack of amnesia blackouts. These people will still dissociate to a degree that counts as a disorder. I have known people with OSDD and it is very real and oftentimes painful, coming to terms with the fact that you've been so traumatized that it necessitates dissociating from reality. It is not fun at its core and I do not wish that on anyone, but it doesn't mean these people aren't valid if they embrace or highlight the positive aspects of their condition to cope.

What makes me sussy-wussy is Poppy's insistence as a "professional" to conflate OSDD/DID with Tulpamancy, the former being traumagenic and the latter being pseudo-spiritual. The topic of endogenic vs. traumagenic alters is one I do NOT want to debate here. I will say I dont appreciate when she combines medically recognized disorders with spirituality, as doing so can contribute to misinformation that we ALREADY have to deal with. If you believe in tulpamancy, I won't argue with you, but you have to be precise in the language you use as to not spread misinfo. Sometimes people have traumagenic disorders that they frame with a spiritual lense, which I can respect, but please be mindful when comparing your experience with others. That's all I ask.

-

Noehflake, Hayleigh, is a transgender woman who also has a dissociative disorder with at least one alter. In the docs, this alter is referred to as "Max." That is not their current name and I do not feel comfortable airing it out. Hayleigh is not a separate alter to "Noehflake." Hayleigh is simply Noehflake's name. Their experience is not fun and Max has to intervene in especially stressful situations. Hayleigh dissociates, and you can tell in her dedicated doc just how much Poppy and Zena disregard her pain and push her into dissociating more.

-

Also if I have to hear someone pronounce Noehflake as "Noh-ee-flake" I'm going to eat my fucking hands. It's nitpicky but it's aggravating to listen to over and over. It's pronounced "Noh-flake." Like snowflake. I've made the mistake of pronouncing it as "No-ah-flake." Just saying "Noh" is fine.

-

Zena is an AFAB transmasc person with agender qualities that goes by they/them, though I have heard they have given the "she/her pass" to close people. Stick with they/them, out of basic respect and to prevent confusion. Zena is significantly younger than Poppy, to the point where an anon pointed out they have less than a decade difference in age from Poppy's child. I can't believe I have to specify this, but Zena is NOT the biological father/mother of Poppy's child. I heard that in one of the worst videos covering this topic and I had to leave out of pure frustration.

-

Dormiyu is the asexual victim that Poppy and Zena brought to their house. Dormiyu uses it/its pronouns. Poppy wants you to think there was only one instance where Poppy walked out in her underwear to get clothes and Dormiyu freaked out. There were two instances. One was when she was in her set of underwear and Dormiyu looked away, to which Poppy chided it for its "asexual bullshit." The second incident involved Dormiyu being in her office. Poppy entered the office with her bare breasts out and sat in front of Dormiyu to get it to notice her. This, obviously, made Dormiyu very uncomfortable, to which Poppy argued that they "were just tits." I don't have to go into fine detail as to why showing your bare breasts to a guest in your home is inappropriate, especially when the guest does not have the transportation to leave your house. Poppy has since blackmailed Dormiyu into deleting everything as it is an immigrant and her delving into its personal life on stream would not only put Dormiyu at risk of doxxing, but at risk of deportation. You will find the archive of Dormiyu's testimony in my masterlist.

-

This is especially important to highlight. Poppy admitted in a video to "reproducing" CSA onto a family member. To others, this may seem like a smoking gun. Unfortunately, this is a case I cannot in good conscience speculate on. I can't. One, we ONLY have Poppy's vague testimony on camera. Any surrounding info is secondhand. Second, we do not know if this victim wants their story told by us. I'm not sure they even know who we are. I cannot perpetuate what is essentially a ghost of an accusation when I do not know if the victim is even comfortable having that public. All I can say is that I do not trust Poppy. We have so much more tangible evidence to prove Poppy is all-around abusive, and I will stick to what has been substantiated.

Thank you for listening to me. I know this is a lot and some of it seems pedantic, but I care a lot about how we cover this.

[study-core-101]

Hii your blog is so inspiring and helpful ❤

I don't know if you already posted about this but I want advice :D

I'm studying the equivalent to High School in my country (two years only) and I'm trying to strive more. Lately I have realised that I never have free time. I spend the afternoons studying, then I have dinner with my parents, watch something on TV, go to sleep and at those hours I'm so tired that I don't have the energy to do anything else I enjoy. Meanwhile, I see my friends and others at my class going out, going to extracurriculars, getting things done faster...

I've always had the feeling that I only do the things I like during summer break.

I can't help but wonder how am I gonna do when I'm in collage (if I actually get there)!

I would like to ask you if you had any advice, or tips about managing time etc

Pd: sorry if this was too long, personal or if I made any gramatical mistakes lol

Hii, sorry it took me so long to answer! From what I heard, it sounds like so kind of burnout. I'm no expert on this topic, so I'm going to leave the links of the sources just in case! (x) (x)

One of main components it's exhaustation. Feeling tired all the time and having no energy. Not only it impacts the mental and physicial health, but the perfomance. This usually stems of being always "on", overwork culture/mentality, pressure (whether internal or external) and the dislike of the tasks. What I recommend is:

Actually rest. Do activities that make mentally rest or dont do any activity, just take some time for yourself. Listen to your favourite music, take a bath, do some breathing exercise. Relax. Here are some more mental rest activities.

Dont beat yourself for resting. A lot of times, we "rest" but it isnt actually rest, because instead of focusing on yourself you are worrying about not doing anything productive 24/7. That looks like rest, but it isnt, it is just more tiring. All the toxic productivity mentality has to go.

Schedule time to do nothing. Establish clear moments for resting.

Take breaks.

Prioritaze tasks. Yes, we all want to have everything done perfectly and complete, but sometimes that is just impossible. The best way to classify them in order is 1) urgent and important; 2) not urgent but important; 3) urgent but no important; and 4) not urgent not important.

Have a good sleep schedule.

Drink water and eat all your meals

Find a hobbie or something you are passionate or at least midly interested on. Something that fills you with joy and seek to. At the beggining it will feel like a waste of time, but once you find something, well, let's just say, try it.

Another thing is the mindset. Negative thinking is unmotivating and tiring. Switching to a more possitive mentality does wonders.There are a lot of ways to reframe negative thoughts, I'm not familiar with most of them so I cant really explain, but here is an article that explains on detail how to do it.

Even though exhaustation and mentality are key to feeling burn out, inefficiency also has an important role. There are millions of study methods, but not a single one works for every person. Maybe you use a "good" study technique, but it isnt the right one for you. I'd recommend trying new ways of studying you havent tried before, see if at least one works for you. I'm going to honest with you, I dont know a lot of methods, since i found the one that works with me I havent tried new ways, here is a list of study methods with explanations that I'm using to draft future posts. Here are the links for the posts are posted about blurting, feynman and pq4r, if any of those sound helpful.

SELF CARE!!!!! Self-care is so important. It's been a common theme in this post, but I will repeat it once more, take care of yourself.

If these are also helpful, I'll leave the links for previous posts about motivation to start, motivation in general, and a reward system for motivation. Not all the tips in those posts will work, actually, some of them may contradict with what I just said, but I posted them with a different situation in mind. Take the tips that will help you and ignore the ones you think will just make it worse.

Hope this helps and good luck!

[shsl-heck]

So because I've seen it compared to Worm, I started reading The Boys by Garth Ennis. It's bad! Like really bad! It feels like what would happen if you let an edgy anti-feminist atheist youtuber from 2015 write a comic book. I finished the first volume of the omnibus in large part because it was a train wreck I couldn't look away from, and am debating starting the second since I hate myself. The most interesting parts are actually the little forewords. Through them I learned both that it was supposed to be a comedy, and also a critique of the military industrial complex/police (or at least that people read it as one). This was surprising to me since it is neither funny nor incisive. Anyway, now I want to ramble incoherently about my problems with it because this goddamn comic broke my brain.

Okay, so one of the most common ways it shows you which characters you aren't supposed to like is by having them do comically "gross" sex stuff. Notable examples include cocaine fueled orgies, mentions of shitting during sex, bestiality, masturbating in public to the sight of disabled people, and a little person using sex toys. One that shows up repeatedly in this context is characters being bisexual or gay. Now, I don't wanna get controversial, but I think any claims that your work is a critique of capitalism, police, the military, or whatever are rendered moot when your villains are a group of secret hedonistic sex-freaks. Like we can't pretend that doesn't sound a lot like regressives and their obsession with "degeneracy". Sexual assaults, misogyny, and slurs also appear pretty often, mostly as the punch line for jokes. Victims are rendered down into objects and denied any sense of interiority so we can instead focus on what really matters (gore porn, and middle school 4chan posters' sense of humor). Never once does Ennis deign to explore the actual impact and trauma of these things, or ask why he views these things as material for jokes.

That incuriosity is I think the real problem with The Boys. There is no actual coherent thought about why things are bad. Superheroes hurt people and are wrong because of their personal moral failings as selfish perverts, not because their whole job is to violently enforce the will of the state. It's like if someone agreed that all cops are bastards, but only because all cops just so happened to be "bad apples". The main characters literally work for the fucking CIA, and yes, I know the titular Boys are at best meant to be anti-heroes a la the Punisher. My issue here isn't that they're hypocrites who are frequently also horrible. It's that this premise for is absolute nonsense if you think for half a second. Superheroes do not function without the legitimacy granted to them by the state and it's monopoly on violence, so why would the CIA need these 5 randos with zero oversight working to take out the supers? Is the force Homelander and the others can bring to bear so great that even the apparatus of that state can't deal with them? If so, why does this group of assholes change that? Normally I'd be willing to give the story a lot more of a pass when it comes to questions like this, except I'm being told that this story has things to say about systemic problems involving the government and corporations! So I have to ask, where? Where is the commentary? What does it actually have to say about the state of the world circa 2006-2012? The only answer I can come up with is "not a whole lot". It's a story which dares to ask the tough questions like "what if the world was made of pudding" and then ignore answering those questions so it can instead recite Ellis' favorite slurs in alphabetical order while showing you a woman's tits.

On a lighter note, it's also just not very good. The plot (as mentioned) falls apart under any amount of scrutiny, pacing is bizarre in a bad way, the characters aren't compelling, themes remains stubbornly unexplored, and Ellis is allergic to doing anything interesting or creative with the premise he's decided to base a whole comic around. I genuinely do not know what people enjoy(ed) about this comic.

[kays-dream]

𝟎𝟒/𝟎𝟗/𝟐𝟎𝟐𝟒

Sooo I'm currently on spring break and I feel like this is finally a good opportunity to break into a bunch of new good habits! Today I plan on setting some goals for myself and maybe telling you a bit about my day and stuff :)

I'll break this down into a couple sections...

𝙰𝚌𝚊𝚍𝚎𝚖𝚒𝚌 𝚐𝚘𝚊𝚕𝚜

During quarters 1-3 of the school year I was kind of out of it, I didn't really study or do much. I wasn't up to my own standards and I think that's because I didn't really set clear standards for myself. I feel if I start planning more and setting more goals I can have improved motivation and productivity that I've yet to experience. During this last quarter of the school year I want to actually be active in school and mentally, here's some goals I've set...

bring all my average grades up to at least A's (bio is killing me ;-;)

make quizlets for each class to prepare for finals !!

to start actively participating in class taking notes and finally raising my hand

to actually spend at least one day a week studying (a small start— but an impactful one :3)

𝙰𝚝𝚑𝚕𝚎𝚝𝚒𝚌 𝚐𝚘𝚊𝚕𝚜

I've never really been an athletic person until now. My whole life I was never forced into sports or anything, I always wanted my mom to do something like that, but she never did, and with that I just grew up kind of lazy. At the age of 11 I picked up gymnastics but then stopped due to the pandemic, I didn't really train or anything so I didn't improve till I started taking classes again, I've been taking classes for around 2 years straight now but only recently I actually started taking gymnastics seriously, I've realized that I could be just as good as the girls I long to be like if I'd only put in the work and effort.

I didn't really realize how much I liked sports up until a couple weeks ago when I impulsively joined my schools track team out of boredom, I'm lowkey one of the worst on the team, but from the bottom you can only move upwards! Now I really want to take my sports seriously, I'm on my gymnastics pre-competitive team and I'm thinking about committing to their bronze team this fall, but I need to actually put in effort now, and I really need to improve at track. Here's my current goals that I'm aiming for...

to start stretching everyday

to run a mile everyday till I can reach a 5 minute mile easily

to get a 15 second 100m dash (guys I'm slow ik...)

to vault 6ft on pole vault

to regain my lost skills on bars (after my last gymnastics comp I keep getting overly anxious before doing legit the easiest skills on bars)

to train my core more

𝙷𝚊𝚋𝚒𝚝𝚜

My mental states been pretty messy recently, but I've been contemplating what's factoring into it and I'm come to the conclusion that my habits need to improve, they've been negatively effecting me for too long, now it's time I implement good habits. I always procrastinate, I think but never do, my rooms a mess which ='s my brain being a mess. I need to get myself together by cleaning and starting new good habits, some of these habits include...

working out and stretching everyday (as mentioned before!)

making sure to do my skincare every morning and every night (recently I've finally invested in some new skincare products and this is really a helpful habit both physically and mentally for me)

cleaning my room and keeping it clean

having me time (whether it be reading a book or playing a lil video game by myself, I feel like as an extrovert I literally force myself to be around or on call with people 24/7 and I think I need to start having time to reflect and be just Kay for a minute)

𝚁𝚎𝚓𝚎𝚌𝚝𝚒𝚘𝚗 𝚝𝚑𝚎𝚛𝚊𝚙𝚢

(my version)

I feel like my whole life I've been terrified of rejection, I've let it get a hold of me. Sometimes I miss out on really good things, since I'm too anxious of the possibility of an unhappy outcome. I think what really made me wanna start rejection therapy is that a week or so ago I applied for this really cool looking job at a creative workshop and got rejected due to my word choice and not diving deep enough into my experiences within the application, it really upset me. I finally put myself out there and I got rejected. Rejection is really scary, I've confessed to like 3 people and gotten rejected 2/3 times... I feel as though I need to prove to myself that rejection isn't that bad, if it's meant to be it'll be, and if it doesn't that is perfectly fine. To combat this fear and disappointment rejection gives me I'm going to put myself out there more. Who knows, maybe good will come out of this too :) I'm gonna start... (these aren't really 100% rejection but I think they'll help me be less scared of the possibility of rejection yk?)

applying for more jobs

signing up for more possible opportunities

entering more contests

trying to talk to more new people (I'm always terrified that they'll tell me to go away or that I'm annoying or something)

Anyways sorry for the yap fest!! I'll be updating on my goals every once in a while sooo stay tuned ig :)

[oh-my-may]

Hey there

Hi, this is my reintroduction to tumblr (kinda).

I go by May on the internet, it's some weird nickname I made of my real name and goes back to my first gamer tag on minecraft...

I'm currently 22 years of age, which sometimes makes me feel incredibly old on the internet? At the same time I seem to come across many other people my age who go through very similar struggles as me lol

I curretnly work fulltime as a waitress. I'm European so I get paid a proper wage there, and the work with my coworkers is very fun and comforting. I'm not always the biggest fan of other people, but being a people pleaser and having the ability to hide my true personality behind a "nice" facade makes my job possible and bearable. (jk aside, I really like my job)

Hobbies include:

reading (I always say that, but I barely ever pick up a book. Just spent most of my early teen years absolutely ramming through a shit ton of books. I still really enjoy reading, but I barely find the time to do it. My tbr list is endless)

gaming (I'll dip my toes into anything that's not an ego-shooter, my PS5 is one of my most treasured possessions)

watching movies (last year I dragges either my sister or one of my friends to the theaters at least once a month. Doesn't mean I'm a movie critic or anything, but I really like watching movies and I might just share some takes on it on here)

anime (just a select few, the most famous ones. Life's busy when you have a fulltime job and still have other hobbies, but I'm currently on my first watchthrough of One Piece! Will definitely post about this from time to time)

listening to music (realizing I have very basic hobbies bc my parents never urged me to pursue anything specific when I was a child, but anyway: I will listen to almost a bit of anything, but Taylor Swift and Ghost were amongst my most streamed artists on Spotify last year. Do with that info what you will)

writing. I did start with writing fanfiction, first harry potter, then boybands, then kpop, then anime. Most important to me was always my original idea though. I know many people have things like this. A few years ago I thought I'd actually go with trying to publish something. Now I have revised and rethought the whole thing. I barely write, but it's still in the back of my head all the damn time. I always think about writing, but doing the actual thing rn seems impossible.

As I'm writing this I realize how pathetic I feel doing this, beacuse I have this awful feeling no one is gonna respond and I'll end up regretting this so much that I'll delete it. Thank God the internet gives me the opportunity to be anonymous.

Anyway, the previously mentioned hobbies lead to my (current) interests that I'll most likely post about, so if you're into one or more of these things as well, let's chat!

in terms of games: Currently playing through Final Fantasy 7 Rebirth and generally FF7 is probably a huge hyperfixation of mine and has been for years. I've just arrived in Gongaga on my playthrough and I'm loving all of it. The game caters to all the expectations and interests I have in games. It's just so insanely beautiful and makes me tear up every couple hours idk

on this note I'd like to mention that I dipped my toes into FF14 but since I only play on Playstaion now, all the commands are overwhelming to me. I'm definitely planning on playing FF15 and FF16

Kinda cringe but I swear I'm normal: Genshin Impact. Have been playing since early 2021, once had a pretty unhealthy relationship to this game, but I was mentally not doing well during that time. Having a fulltime job changed my perspective on the game. Now I'm a casual enjoyer bc I love the open world and characters, and I love to get into the lore, so I might post a few theories and stuff on here

On that note: Honkai Star Rail. Same company, but it took me way longer to get into the game. Really enjoying it now though, although I am struggling with a bunch of battles. Save to say, I am NOT playing the game for the meta lol

One Piece! As mentioned, I started my watch of it last year in summer just before the Netflix live action came out (work bestie talked me into it). I'm quite literally at episode 500 rn. Had to stop for a while at around Thriller Bark bc the first few episodes didn't quite do it for me. Now I try to watch a few episodes before sleep everyday :)

Other anime that I am different levels of unhinged about: Jujutsu Kaisen, Attack on Titan, Bungou Stray Dogs, Demon Slayer. The basics, I know. Just don't have the time to watch a lot while other life stuff happens, you know. OP is the main thing rn, and until I am kinda up-to-date with that, everything else will have to wait lol

In terms of book stuff I must admit I keep going back to communities and fandoms I was a part of when I was a teen lol. This largely refers to stuff like Six of Crows by Leigh Bardugho, The Raven Cycle by Maggie Stiefvater and All for the Game by Nora Sakavic

Right now though I am more interested in reading some classics and other stuff. Read Britney Spears' biography last year (within the span of one day, I wanna add), currently I'm reading a chapter of Crime and Punishment once in a blue moon. I'd like to read more stuff like that in the future, but everything at it's time ig

Other fictional universes I was once quite unhinged about: Game of Thrones and Lord of the Rings. Both communities are kinda dead atm though. I'm still in the process of reading the books (which means I last picked them up over a year ago. But believe me, I'll get there, eventually.... someday)

In terms of music as I said I listen to almost anything. Not a lot of rap and techno, though. I like stuff with lyrics I can sing along to and feel deep within my bones. I wouldn't call myself a "fan" of any particular artist, I was very unhinged about musicians as a teen and I have learned my lesson. Now I just listen to the music without caring too much about the artist themselves. I used to really like 5 Seconds of Summer as a teen, then I moved to Kpop. Now I barely keep up with either but just listen to the stuff I did back then

I think that's basically it for now? The most important parts about myself. Stuff I like to talk about, so if you like some of this too, maybe come talk to me? I wanna get to know people here after all, and I have learned this is probably the best way to start.

I don't have many conditions for friends tbh. I'm 22, so anything between like 19 and 26 or so is fine as long as the vibes are good :) I don't care about genders and all that, personally going by she/her. I'm a Taurus, in case someone wants to know. Last time i took the test I was an infp-t (still think it's pretty accurate but it's been a few years nd I heard that test isn't as accurate? idk)

Other things you should maybe know is that English is not my native language, so excuse any mistakes you might come across lol. I dropped out of university. My profile picture kinda captures my most basic features.

Anyway, feel free to hit me up, I love talking to people on the internet and I really look forward to this reinvention of my account here and actually talking about my interests and reposting stuff I like :)

If you have any questions, just ask!

Until then,

May

[ohlookapan]

BG3 and their fave classic novels (at least what i thought at 4am) Karlach: Frankenstein (she read it growing up and liked it but now it feels bittersweet when she rereads - but she feels like it makes the book better somehow now that she relates to it more) Laezel: Catch 22 Gale: The Great Gatsby or Hitchhikers guide to the galaxy Astarion: Catcher in the Rye (i dont know why it just feels right) Wyll: anything by Jane Austen (explains why he acts like a regency love interest) Shadowheart: Charlotte's Web (denies that she even knows it exists but she always cries when she reads it) Halsin: The Secret Garden Jahera: The Alchemist

These are all so perfect are you kidding me-

Your answer gave me a few ideas of ones I might change, but they're very few. I do want to share my thoughts on all your answers though because damn are they good and give me a buffet of food for thought.

Karlach: I'm actually furious I didn't think of Frankenstein, the symbolism is unfathomably perfect.

Lae'zel: She's always been a tough one for me to think of, so I'm so happy to hear Catch 22 as a suggestion. Honestly the phrase itself sums her (and Shadowheart) up pretty well; Either abandon your faith and start fresh (conveniently lost, if you will), or stay with a faith that you know or have an inkling might be morally wrong/deviant and have to live with it for the rest of your life. I love the idea.

Gale: Hitchhiker's Guide. No question. He's definitely the type to finish it in 2 weeks and secretly write fanfiction or self inserts for things and never tell anyone (maybe Tav or Astarion finds them and bullies him about it--but they can't judge since that's what daydreaming is for lol).

Astarion: Gatsby, which you suggested for Gale, is honestly a good one for Astarion. I definitely think he can relate to Jay--wanting to throw your life of pain and nothingness away to become something totally new and forget that old life of yours, no matter what the cost is--and think he definitely picked up on the queer-coding thing pretty fast (he believes it, I imagine). I think he could think of himself as Daisy does: "A beautiful little fool."

I also can see The Picture of Dorian Gray being a good one. I made a post about this in the past but I will never turn down an opportunity to talk about it; I feel like he'd be SUPER into Oscar Wilde and the way he views the world. To me, it fits his aesthetic and flowery dialect almost scarily well.

Catcher and the Rye though, definitely. He carries a worn out copy of that book EVERYWHERE. It's like a teddy bear to him. Maybe that's what he's reading all the time at camp?

Wyll: This is the best one, oh my Gods. I've never thought about it but now I can't unsee it during my playthrough. The almost flowery elegance he has is definitely Austen-coded. Beautiful.

Shadowheart: THIS. I definitely think Charlotte's Web boosted her love for animals, but I also think it helped her figure out her own personal thoughts about death, outside of Lady Shar's teachings. Given how much I think the book would impact and mean to her, I can totally see her naming a pet Wilbur or Charlotte.

Like Halsin, I think The Secret Garden also fits. Her love for Night Orchids, as well as the idea of there being something more out there than what meets the eye--something more beautiful than anything anyone could imagine, and something that completely takes your breath away and makes you forget about everything--is EXTREMELY appealing to her, I'd imagine. I like to think she notices Halsin reading it and walks a bit behind the group to talk about the book with him (lord knows the minute someone knows Shadowheart likes something so sweet like that, it's over for her (especially Astarion)--Gale though would totally keep it in mind and find a gold-foil copy for her).

Halsin: The idea of him sitting under a tree or something and reading The Secret Garden kills me in the best way. Maybe he's reading it out loud to ducks or squirrels (then the group hears him and gathers around for circle reading time because his voice is PERFECT for reading aloud (I think his VA even did an audiobook? Don't quote me on that though)).

Jaheira: Yes. Just... Unequivocally yes. Nothing more to say. The Alchemist is so accurate.

[moonmeg]

Hey so I really love your art and your body poses ars always so fluent! I have a very simple style what is your suggestion for artists who want to change from cartoony to a more realistic style like yours? And how do you get your anatomy so good!!!Also if you have time or effort could you give a small showcase of where you started and where you are now and how you developed the style!?!?

-Small side note in Watching and dreaming what sene made you cry the most?

-Personally balled my eyes out when the collector started crying.Sorry for the long thread but what do you think happened to the collecotr?

-KEEP UP THE JAW DROPPING ART!!!❤️

Thank you so, so much!

The time skip made me so happy yet so emotional but I think when the collector started crying after Luz "died", yeah that might be the moment :')

I started developing my own style the way it is now with my entry into the Hamilton fandom. I've had a style before, that I drew Miraculous Ladybug fanart with and it looked something like this

I was 14 when I drew this. I was still heavily influenced by an anime art style despite me never having seen an anime at that point in my life.

With entering the Hamilton fandom, however, I found animatics. Szin was an artist that had an art style I looked at with 15/16 and said "I want that.". So I started copying some things from szin's artstyle that I really liked (the way they drew hair and noses specifically). Over time I discovered other artists that I had art-style envy over. That being caw-chan and ziksua predominantly. I think I adapted more from caw-chan and szin than from ziksua but I would lie if I said her art didn't have an impact on me.

So my art style developed year by year.

There are big time skips between these deawings but if you're interested in my Hamilton era search #hamilton on my tumblr and scroll through it a bit. Or if you go down the rabbit hole on pinterest just enough, you'll find old art to. Search "megpeggs" on pinterest for that.

During Hamilton times of course not only other artists inspired me but I also started looking up tutorials or art commentaries on YouTube. Videos where an artist genuinely critiques their viewers art proved most useful, because they show you how to improve the anatomy, what basic rules you can follow to get anatomy right etc. And of course, references and realistic portraits. (That last drawing was created with a reference.)

If you want a more realistic art style you need to study the realistic anatomy and know how to draw something realistic. For that you need a reference that you look at again and again, basically analyzing it and taking it apart to see how what looks and how you can best copy it on canvas.

Depending on complexity it of course is rather time consuming but it's a huge help. If you know how to draw something pretty damn realistic, you can easily cartoonify or simplify certain features. (Not saying I'm so great at realism but I'd say I'm not that bad at it either)

Enter Avatar era.

A show where you can bend elements and a show that is filled with quite a lot of fight scenes makes you want to do fanart that is as dynamic. So you sit there staring at pose references again. Or you take pictures of yourself doing these things. I can't say how much the ATLA and LOK art style influenced me because there barely is any resemblance between the show and my art but I do ghink it had at least a little impact on my art style.

It involved a lot of referencing and copying (important note: not tracing!) in my case. And that's really the most important tip I can give here. Studying and analyzing the reference picture you chose. How long and thick are limbs? How big are the hands? The torso? The neck? How much smaller or bigger does this limb look due to the perspective? Learn the rules before you break them.

Some examples:

Foreheads are bigger than they seem! Remember that your character needs to fit a brain in there.

You should be able to fit one third eye between the two eyes - that's the usual distance.

Eyes are on one height with where the ears begin.

The nose's end is on one height with the earlobe.

The distance from the outer corner of the left eye to the outer corner of the right eye is the same length as the neck (in thickness)

Remember that the neck supports the head. When drawing a side profile it should start at the back of the head and leave some room for a jaw.

Hands are big enough to cover your entire face.

Your elbow is on one height with your waist.

Your whole arm should reach from shoulders to about the middle of your thigh.

There's space between breasts and the neck. You have a collarbone there!

Natural breasts hang. They have weight to them and get pulled down by gravity.

There's bones and organs everywhere in your body and they need space too

Skin wrinkles Angle your arms or hand. You're not a Barbie, you've got wrinkles there on elbow and wrist.. Furrow your eyebrows. The skin on your forehead wrinkles.

Everything I listed here is something you can go check out on your own body and it should be correct. Of course this is just the usual way anatomy is like - exceptions are found everywhere.

If my art style is something you look up to, as weird as it sounds, study it. Look at the way I draw things and try to copy them and incorporate them into your own style.

It's also important you go out of your comfort zone.

With TDAAC I couldn't name what exactly changed or developed in my art style more but I do know I started to hide hands less and challenge myself to actually draw that hand pose, staring at references from pinterest or my own hands doing that pose.

Art is a matter of learning and studying. It's time consuming, it's nerve-wreking, you may sit there and ask yourself why the hell you decided to do art but it's worth it all.

I'd recommend keeping your old art around somewhere. Over the years you can then always go back to it and compare it to your current art and see just how much you grew as artist. And that is something that definitely comes. The more you draw, the more you learn. It's not witchcraft, even if it might seem like it sometimes.

I'll add some more art of mine in a reblog, since tumblr only allows me to add 10 images.

[muzzleroars]

I love love love your angel OCs and like to imagine them vibing on their own or together post gabriel murdering the entire council, like either they were spared or had some reason why they weren't there and weren't killed or whatever however I also like to sometimes imagine that these are the people who were killed during all that because we don't really know much about the people in the council Gabriel killed besides their devotion to God and this makes Gabriel's actions kinda like hit harder, if that makes sense. Like he killed actual dudes, some of them were nice or cool or whatever, but he thought it had to be done regardless. Makes it like sad but also more impactful. idk i just have fun thinking about it sometimes I'd love to see more of these OCs! I love the little glimpses into the inner workings of the council and heaven that they offer!

aaaa thank you!! i absolutely have ideas about at least a couple pieces i want to make with them, as i sort of decided to finally solidify their designs and characters largely to explore some other sides of gabriel. as the other archangels, he knew them best throughout his time in heaven as the four of them were made as a "set", all to balance one another. i really did consider making them a part of the council, but ultimately i made them separate from it for two reasons: they rank the same as gabriel and i think the council members specifically may have blocked their entry due to the idea that any one of them, let alone all four, could easily overtake the other members and control the entirety of the council; also i...just want to play with their interactions post-gabriel's "betrayal" and loss of grace since i think they all have very different reactions to it.

like i mentioned in raphael's post, he was actually the only other archangel present at the death of the council - he and gabriel had increasingly sporadic interactions throughout that time, with both of them consciously chalking it up to how busy they were given raphael's emotional tending to the people of heaven and gabriel's constant work for the council...but in reality, i think gabriel's faith was weakening while raphael refused to acknowledge any issues, making it harder over time for gabriel to continue relating to him. i do definitely want to draw raphael finding him just before he leaves heaven afterward, knowing that gabriel is now going to be condemned to hell and struggling to understand what that means for the archangels, for heaven as whole, and for the plan he has always been so sure of.

uriel and michael, on the other hand, actually don't know anything about the council's formation - uriel's meditation began before it was conceived while michael left heaven around the time they began to discuss potential fixes to the leadership issue, claiming he would find god to plead his return but hasn't been seen since. they only all meet again when gabriel falls - in the interim, raphael has been left on his own to deal with the inevitable fallout while he mourns both gabriel and all that once was. uriel wakes first upon gabriel's death and rebirth as a fallen angel, the disturbance so terrible and unexpected that he can no longer stay dreaming. he finds a heaven collapsed, eternal blood stains that can't be scrubbed from the halls of paradise and distinctly feeling the horrible loss of gabriel - to lose one is to lose a part of themselves. he seeks out raphael to fully understand what's happened (who is deeply grateful to have another archangel back), but shortly thereafter michael finally returns to heaven.

angels, by their very natures, are creatures not meant to live alone - while they're certainly not a hivemind, i do like to think they have clusters they are interconnected with for their work like i've been talking about with the archangels. michael, being so far gone for so long and away from the tempering personalities of his fellow archangels, has grown into an extreme and twisted form of his intrinsic personality and position. importantly, i see gabriel as his biggest influence - they are warriors matched in strength both physically and characteristically, but gabriel had always been more compassionate while michael was stronger in faith. because of their even footing, they retained a mutual respect and understanding of one another that allowed both of them to be kept in check even though they tended to butt heads the most out of the four. now, however, michael has lost his counterpart and has been too long on his own besides, so upon his return, he is consumed with righteous fury and a dire need to see gabriel punished for his fall. michael, as the binder of demons and the damned, wishes to personally chain him to the lowest circle of hell, to never move freely again and to only feel pain for the rest of his existence as all those condemned must. as the prince of angels, his strength of personality and god-given leadership convinces uriel and raphael to join him in his work, though the two of them are not nearly as sure about the proper course of action.

heaven is changed, god and one of their archangels is gone, as well as many of the highest due to their loss as council members; additionally, hell itself is in shambles, self-directing and doing as it pleases as its own entity with machines making it down to its very bowels. but michael doesn't care, nor does he seem to realize his motivations now are far from a simple exercise in doing as god would have wanted, but instead are driven by his own personal pain and by a mind changed by his time in solitude (plus, in a sense, feeling responsible as michael's faith bolstered gabriel's and so...is something of his fall not on his shoulders now?) and so he commands uriel and raphael by his side to see gabriel bound or killed if he refuses to accept his due punishment. gabriel, physically, has always been the strongest of them in my interpretation (due to his title of "god is my strength"), but michael is matched quite well and with the other two, he fully believes them capable of subduing the fallen angel. unfortunately, he doesn't realize gabriel's going to give him a much harder time than even THAT, since he's got. he's got a creepy little robot now!!!!

[loudlyunladylike]

Hey there,

It's been a while hasn't it? 2 whole years is a long time to be gone, so to those of you who remember me, don't worry I'm alive and well! Or as well as I can be, and to those who don't remember or don't know me, hi there! My name is Ender, or at least that's what most people know me for.

I'm the first anon who tecnically originated the whole Unsung Falls thing, if any of you remember it, I'm also the one who kinda made the named anon things so prominent in this blog.

Now that most of you are familiar with me, you're probably wondering what happened, where I've been, the whole shee bag. Well, for starters, I'd like to apologize for just vanishing for 2 years straight, I hope I didn't freak anyone out during that time.

But explaining what happened, well, the entire thing started when I was at the peak of my hyperfixation with dsmp, I found Loudly's blog and started interacting from there, but I was starting to fall out of interest with the fandom, and when Technoblade passed away, well... I couldn't hold myself much longer in the fandom, and I started drifting away from a lot of things I used to enjoy.

Then life happened, and life is still happening, I started learning more abaut myself and dealing with a lot of personal things, specially abaut my gender identity, remember when we joked abaut Ranboo stealing our genders? Yeah, guess that wasn't much of a joke after all (this little egg finally got out of the shell 🏳️‍⚧️!). Another things is that I've been researching for my first big scale school project that I have to present untill the end of the year, so yeah, I've been busy.

But just because I've been busy dosen't mean I forgot abaut this blog, I've made incredibly good memories here, and I've met amazing people as well, specially the blog owner, you were a big inspiration and motivation to pursue my little writing streak Loudly.

And don't think I've forgotten abaut any of you Unsung Falls anons, I may not remember all of your names, but I do have many found memories with all of you, and belive me when I say that you all made an impact bigger on me than any of you will ever know.

I'm not sure if I'll be back fully or not, I might drop by every once in a while, but I'm not sure, but what I am sure is that I won't ever forget this blog or any of the people in it. I might move on from the fandom, but I'll always remember every single one of you with a smile on my face.

Besides, I'm always lurking around in this blog, even when I couldn't interact much, so don't worry, I'll still be here even if you can't see me.

I don't see this as a goodbye, I see this as a "see you around", because that's what I hope will happen son.

See you around Unsung Falls!

From a young Farlander and aspiring writer

– Ender Anon/⟒⋏⎅⟒⍀ ⏃⋏⍜⋔💜🤍

ENDER!!!! :")

OH MY GOD, OUR BELOVED HI!!! Oh I missed you, we missed you, god two years hi. This feels like the end of a season finale where a character last seen in like season one appears and the crowd goes wild.

More importantly though hi I'm glad you're doing well :") even with all those ups and downs and busyness but that's ok, we all have those. Congrats on the gender btw🏳️‍⚧️🏳️‍⚧️!!! holy shit so epic!!!! And your project, and your writing!! aaa, incredible soso cool, you're doing fantastically and I'm so proud of you.

Oh I feel so emotional overwhelmed and touched by all of this lovely-ness /pos. No matter how much you come and go you've always got a place here, we haven't forgot about you either and we never will, you're awesome, see you around friend! o7

[wytfut]

tiny gifts (not really)

As anyone knows that reads my goofy thoughts here. I write, as I like to write, and sometimes I get an ear worm, that just won't let go of me. This is not me trying to create art (at least I don't believe so), as much as its journal of ear worms.

The meds I did 6 weeks ago, were mind bending. I think so much that some thoughts may have just disappeared.

But one ear worm has stuck with me for weeks now. But I haven't been able to write about it, with the correct impact. Not that I write to improve myself, or make perfect prose. That is a laugh within its self....

......

I have what I feel very fortunate, many friends. Many of them I consider very loyal, as I'm very loyal to them. Im very comfortable with this.

One of them is some distance from me. We have a very odd and scary cosmic relationship which I won't go into any details. But sometimes it appears we are doublegangers of sorts.

He has had handed him by life, to raise his own grandchild. I've seen this done many times in my life time. And without putting a foot into the water, I don't know that I could do this my self. I would hope I could, but I don't know I could.

This grandchild has picked a life style, that is challenging enough for adults, let alone a teenager.

Because of this choice of life style, the pressure became too much. And the grandchild made an effort to end it all, around the middle of November if I remember right...

Let the above sink in for a bit before continuing on..... just put yourself there for a moment.

......

By nature, I try to help folks out when ever possible. Many times its a huge task, but generally, I won't turn anything down. Strangers and friends alike.

My buddy, in this situation, I couldn't help him other than by phone call, or email.

During this event, I don't recall for sure, but we ended up on the phone with each other (I think I called him, for a weekly chat). He tried to make like it was a regular day in his life, but he started to fall apart in the conversation. He finally broke down and told me the details. I insisted he hang up as family needed him (for goodness sake, he was in the E.R. when he answered his phone). And told him to call me when things freed up.

He did. I hope I helped in conversation with him, but probably will never know for sure. I did my best at the moment, we don't get rehearsal time.

In our weekly conversations, I'd ask about the grandchild after the initial event. And he'd reply "all appears to be going well..." ... As I trust my friend, I believed him, but still thought about the grandchild time to time.

......

No one wants to lose family. Especially family that is younger than yourself. Even more so, when this family member is blood. This event had an impact on my friend.... and yeah, myself (as selfish as it is).

Time as usual continued on...

......

A week before Xmas, we were having our weekly phone call. My buddy during the phone call, called out to his grandchild who had just walked in the door to home(with honest enthusiasm). The grand child responded, with even more enthusiasm, the same back at him. So much so, I lost thought train on our conversation. it took my breath away. This was via a phone call thousands of miles away, but I honestly heard "I'm fine, and I'm going to get better"

......

My tiny gift I received for Xmas, . And I got it via listening on the phone.

My buddy, also got this very same gift, in person. .... PLUS. His grandchild is healing. And he didn't loose his grandchild....

......

Xmas 2023.... one hell of a Xmas

[chromotps]

The thing about Ace/Sabo is that the ship is less about them being brothers but more like them sharing a childhood friendship? That had the potential of becoming something more in the future. Except it didn’t, for obvious reasons. And yeah not everyone’s a fan of that, but people also like the raised by wolves/son of a noble dynamic they had as children. While I agree Sabo does kind of feel like he was stuck to Ace&Luffy as an afterthought, with a piece of chewed-out gum — his existence doesn’t… I don’t know, feel out of place? I also enjoy how kinda tragic his character is, and how he carries that tragedy with him? In the form of Ace’s devil fruit (Sabo also canonically hallucinates and there was an instance where he admitted to hearing Ace’s voice, during his fight with Burgess? so yeah, not everyone’s cup of tea again but I’m a huge fan of hurt/comfort so having a character go through a psychotic depressive episode because of the insane guilt he feels? Just, yeah. Plus there’s something really poetic about him literally eating Ace’s DF and still considering it „Ace’s powers” etc) and the way I see Sabo/Lu is through Ace/Lu (and partially Ace/Sabo) anyway. Because Sabo is trying to fill out the role of an older brother/friend for Luffy that he’s well aware is impossible to fill — because nothing ever will be the same for Luffy. Nothing or no one could even come close to making it up for Ace’s loss to Luffy, and Sabo knows he’s kind of a cheap copy of that (figuratively and literally lmfao, as I know people have been calling him low-budget Ace), but still he tries to? And the fact that Luffy is technically his only remaining family (or at least someone he willingly considers family). And I kind of see it as a parallel to how Ace’s approach to Luffy changed after Sabo’s „death”? Because Sabo was the „kinder” brother, the nicer one, the smarter one, it was usually him who took Luffy’s side whenever Ace was annoyed with him? And the one who explicitly asked Ace to look after Luffy — which then was one of the direct reasons why Ace changed the way he treated Luffy, forced him to be more patient/learn to love and eventually led to Ace willingly becoming the „older brother” figure for Luffy. I’m in no way trying to convince you to like Sabo, don’t get me wrong!! I’m just trying to show an example how Ace/Sabo isn’t necessarily brotherly either (like, I don’t know, Sabo/Luffy seems to be?). And it’s just that while I’m first and foremost a huge Ace/Lu enjoyer I also think Sabo did have a significant impact on their relationship both before and after Ace’s death.

((!! sorry i took a while to reply! i made that post before work on Friday and then got slammed until just now fdghjgk)

the odd thing is, I mostly agree!! I think I had to vent bc i saw ppl (a few specific sabo fans haha) on twitter acting like luffy would feel nothing toward ace but be obsessed with sabo. and, lol, no. but what YOU said makes total sense. like, yes, Ace + Sabo definitely has a different, more involved feeling to me than Ace & Luffy. I've had some ships in the past that fit the raised by wolves/runaway noble trope... the charm of the noble feeling like "this is the only person I feel like I can really be myself around" and the wild one thinking "i like spending time with this noble—they're tougher/kinder/funnier than i gave them credit for" AND/OR "society has always rejected me, but this 'cultured' person accepting me heals that pain a little bit"—all of those things are really charming.

Maybe if we'd seen more about how ace and sabo became friends, or if there were more emphasis on sabo's acceptance being what helped ace's anger (instead of, just from how i saw things, it being mostly luffy's unconditional warmth toward ace that did it?) then I'd personally be more feral about that dynamic, haha. But it's like you said, I guess it all depends on what we each connect with. I dont find tragedy alone compelling... I'm depressed enough already as it is LMAO!! if I think too hard about how viscerally sad Sabo only remembering Ace after he'd died is, my brain just shuts down. But I've got really good friends who would EAT THAT UP. Like, yeah, it is beautifully poetic... hahaha now i'm laughing thinking about my friends who were really into Hamlet and Romeo & Juliet finding out about Sabo & Ace and being obsessed, ahaha (they're not so into One Piece tho, only jjk... at least, for now!! 😈)

it's hard to put into words, but there's something about Sabo being a revolutionary vs. ace and luffy being pirates, that kind of explains why my brain sees A+L as very very very different than A&S or L&S. But like, that's just my brain and how my heart likes to focus on characters with really codependent relationships/dreams/themes, hahaha...

[yakool-foolio]

this is just a loser finding ways to partially vent but my story it's cringe, undeniably funny, and related to Danganronpa in ways So, uh yeah, if you want to read that'd be nice but if not I understand. When I say Danganronpa is the most impactful media I've ever consumed in my entire life I'm not joking.

I got into Danganronpa after GameGrumps played the first game in 2020, when they finished it I loved it so much I went on to watch someone else play Danganronpa 2. At the time my life was pretty awful, I was sort of becoming numb emotionally everything felt the same day after day, and it's stupid, but when Nagito Komaeda made me feel something after feeling so numb during that time I kind of got obsessed. It was so bad not only did I make myself so much lonelier, but I had to research hyper fixations to know I wasn't insane. So you could say Nagito caused me learning and acknowledging i'm autistic! Which sounds like a big impact until you hear the biggest one.

It was 2021 now, I was still obsessing over Nagito Komaeda and the fixation was so bad that I joined the fandom early before playing v3, Danganronpa on the Nintendo Switch was announced and I was eager and excited so I looked up a ton of reactions on Youtube. A day later Youtube recommended me a live stream, two guys were just joking and playing Danganronpa. My humor was changing but I knew that I laughed at their streams and videos so I stayed, I watched every stream I could and every video uploaded. Eventually I joined their Discord Server, I edit videos so after a while I asked the main owner of the channel for advice on videos and such, and then we bonded over some videos and songs like the v3 hated by life itself animation. After that I always thought of something to text to him every day, as a matter of fact we talked so much that I became behind on School because I'd be talking to him instead. After a while we started calling every day, and then we started face timing, and after that he had confessed to me. At the time I wasn't sure about my sexuality and I had repressed any attraction I felt for anyone out of "respect" So when he confessed to me I was able to think about it finally. It took me 3 days to think about my life and myself and I said yes and we started dating. We met in person 2 times, and dated for 2 years before he broke up with me a few months ago just because life has been hectic I suppose. The channel doesn't have any of its videos public anymore, the server is somehow barely alive for now despite one of the owners already leaving and the other just not talking much, and basically anything that came from all of it no one will know about other than the small group of mutuals that keep in touch and me making these. Most of those mutuals still don't even know that we ever dated. The channel is Emigc btw I think the only thing ever left public is someone reacting to a video he made on Danganronpa S.

anyway boohoo story sad ending but yeah that's how Nagito Komaeda helped me experience my first romantic love and know that i'm autistic, that's it. he's still funnily enough one of my favorite characters of all time i'm normal about him now at the very least Lmao. I finally got into Rain Code after the breakup since I got it for Christmas and it's stupid but it really does feel like the next step? if that makes sense? Danganronpa was the impact to my life, Rain Code is what I'm loving in the aftermath of what Danganronpa has done to my life. I honestly have loved Rain Code somehow even more than I loved Danganronpa, maybe not to the insane extent of Nagito though Lmao. Oh yeah, I also completely skipped over how Danganronpa helped me bond even more with my best friend who feels like a brother to me now but this is already long enough! I've just been making messages about what happened because those were the happiest years of my life and I miss it.

thanks for reading if you did

Goes to show that media really does have a grand effect on our daily lives. From my personal experience, I wouldn't have met any of my friend group, aptly named Ding Dong Bing Bong, without Danganronpa. Long story short, I started playing the first game after watching Game Grumps' playthrough of the 2nd game (and proceeded to spoil myself about the entire trilogy), and I did so in a Discord server. Someone ended up joining me during the start of the prologue, and we shared in voicing the characters. After a few days, another person joined, then another, then another. And now we're a tight huddle of ten after more than a year of playing games together!

It's interesting to hear how the Dangan series, Rain Code, and other media has affected other people as well. Meeting new people, discovering new things about ourselves, and watering our creative roots! Looking back on the moments can boost our spirits, too! I hope the future bodes well for you as you continue to enjoy your interests!

[hiratelier]

Man it's going to be 10 years since I started using UTAU and joined the UTAU community...I got into the whole singing robot gig in 2014 all because of a Hetalia jinriki video, and then many things happened in my time in the community like it was a pipebomb exploding in my face LOL. It's that time when I sort of miss the old 2014 UTAU days, when the community was chill amidst the usual online discourse, when the DeviantArt UTAU community was active, and so on...

I suppose my experience with the community itself has been alright, and it's had its ups and downs. But when I was using Twitter a lot during 2017-2023, I was constantly being exposed to so much discourse that it ended up impacting my mental wellbeing and the way I enjoyed using UTAU. Just constantly seeing the people you looked up to turning out to be horrible and among other things just made my enjoyment with UTAU more and more miserable to the point when I didn't use Twitter for a couple of months.

I think the more positive experiences in this community were among the more memorable ones, among one of them being my participation in the Anison Sprint medley hosted by KIRA and cheesum. Participating in UtauVision 2017 and UHP-CB 2018 were also good memories for me. Over time, I worked on my voicebank production and cover making skills for fun while trying to have a good time, which progressively got harder as online discourse got more frequent. But I made a fair amount of friends along the way, even including those I looked up to a lot.

These days, I don't really interact with the UTAU community that much because of how toxic it can get at times, but I'm trying my best to see the good in it, and I know that there are some good people in there. It's pretty hard to see that since online discourse pops up a lot, especially when it happens on Twitter. And I barely use Twitter other than to retweet art and post my own works there, curating my feed vigorously. I don't really pay that much attention to the more negative stuff that's happening, so I think that has benefited my health significantly.

I guess I just feel like a half-jaded UTAU veteran who's still recovering from a massive cover burnout and is trying to appreciate the UTAU community in spite of everything, and I'm learning not to be obligated to post covers frequently unlike last year. I find myself engaging in other fun hobbies and interests, and at least I'm working on personal projects that don't have to do with singing robots constantly. The only UTAU-related things I'll do for this year is finish up updated standing image artwork and reference sheet for my UTAUs, upload something for their 9th anniversary, and then publish a cover if the inspiration comes to me. Admittedly, even after stepping away from the program, I don't feel THAT pressured to work on something, even when I feel inspired. Maybe it's because of the additional hobbies I've picked up, plus I've been treating my UTAUs as more like OCs these days.

My relationship with UTAU as a hobby is still healing, and maybe one day, I'll get back to posting more covers. But for now, I'd just like to work on other things. It's been a hectic 10 years, and I'd like to it easy. BUT I'm always down to talking about UTAU, because even after all this time, I'm still passionate about it (albeit even more compared to past years) - especially when it comes to voicebank development.

[reesestimpson]

Week 2

In today's world, we are all affected by social media whether we choose to be or not. Even people that don't have a single social media account are affected by media's impact on the business world and companies as a whole. For me personally, I'd say I use social media at least once every hour of the day. This makes me feel constantly attached to the happenings in my community and around the world. I never truly feel isolated.

As Max Stossel discusses in his presentation, companies have created ways to keep users constantly engaged with their apps. The use of symbols is one of the main methods they use. Users know what to expect from each icon, and get satisfaction when they receive the result they want. For instance, Instagram will send notifications featuring a heart symbol when someone likes your post. Users can rely on these platforms to provide this satisfaction daily.

Emma Rathbone's article, "Before the Internet" made me think back to the time when I wasn't on any social media, and it wasn't the large presence it is in today's world. The first half of my life was spent without using a single social media platform, and I was perfectly content with my social life. However, as I was introduced to these sites, expectations in my social life began to change. I realized this when I took a trip to my cottage that has no internet connection. I remember feeling very detached, verging on depressed without it. This is when I realized how much of an addiction I had developed.

After some reflection, I've tried to stop myself from scrolling mindlessly through my social media platforms. I must admit, I still find myself in that position quite frequently. Nonetheless, I've still noticed a decrease in my use of these apps. I was reaffirmed this when I started receiving notifications that my screen time was going down every week. I feel like this can be partly attributed to how busy I've become in college. Most of the time, I find myself on social media during downtime. I don't often go on any social media app with a specific purpose in mind. These type of statistics are very helpful when reflecting on social media use.