#i'm sorry anon that sounds really isolating :(

[problematic-fictive-culture-is]

Problematic fictive culture is having to deal with people telling you to get out of front when you get up there because of your source and the old host dislikes you.

-An Actor Mark fictive

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[danikamariewrites]

heyyy, could I please request a Rhys X reader where the reader is feeling quite isolated, all her friends seem to have moved on in life without her and she's just realised how alone she feels. in her head the inner circle still feel like Rhys's friends, and she doesn't have a circle of her own and is just feeling down? and Rhys comforts her? don't mind me I'm goin' thru it lol sorry, thank you and much love to you

Isolated

Rhys x reader

A/n: I feel you anon. I go through this sometimes bc all my friends live far from me and I don’t have any in my hometown so it’s very isolating.

Warnings: hurt/comfort, slight depression

The weather seemed to match your mood today. Glum and rainy. You were sat on a couch in the town house with your knees pulled to your chest as you watched the rain roll down the window.

One of your best friends had moved over two months ago with her husband to the Winter Court to be closer to his family when their baby is born. You were happy for her, but she was the last of your friend group left in Velaris.

You were feeling lonely without them. It felt like they were all taking the next step in life with their careers or starting their family. Not that you didn’t love your life with Rhys. You’re the center of his universe and you can’t even describe how much you love him.

You just felt like you had nothing left to offer your court. But you didn’t want to move, your whole life is here. And you were working here and there with Rhys with court problems. There wasn’t much you could do until you were married and an official Lady.

And you definitely didn’t want a child. You weren’t there yet with Rhys or in the right headspace to be a mother. It would be unfair for everyone involved.

So you just sat around and read all day. Or walked around the city. Just shopping and seeing what was new. The cycle was getting old. If you went shopping in the Rainbow one more time you were going to throw yourself off the House of Wind.

Mor had tried to invite you out with her and offered to just hang out at home, but you declined almost every time. It felt like she was just offering out of pity. You didn’t want a pity hangout.

You love Mor, sometimes it feels like she, Amren, Cassian, and Azriel weren’t really your friends. You liked them and all but they came as a package deal with Rhys. Lately you felt like you weren’t part of that.

You broke yourself from your reeling thoughts as thunder sounded in the distance, lightning following moments after. You unwrap yourself to take a sip of tea sitting on the side table. Sipping on the liquid you grimace at the cold taste.

Letting out a sigh you set the mug back down. Unmotivated to get a new serving. You wrap your arms tighter around your knees going back to watching the storm.

Rhys padded down the stairs stopping when he noticed you curled into the corner of the couch. He gently approached you, laying a hand on your head, smoothing down your hair. “Hi darling.” His voice soft, “Are you alright?” Rhys knew you weren’t. He didn’t want to push or invade your mind without your permission. Rhys was getting close to doing that though. You were worrying him and you wouldn’t tell him what was weighing you down.

You sat there leaning into his touch for a while. You felt tears prick your eyes as you tried holding them back. You kept swelling back the lump growing in your throat as you tried to get a simple ‘I’m ok’ out.

The tears slip out of the corners of your eyes as you keep watching the storm rage. Rhys smells the salt of your tears. He panics and sits next to you, moving his hand from your head to cradle your cheek.

“Hey,” he coos, “y/n, what’s wrong darling? Please tell me. I’ve been so worried about you.” Your eyes slide over his worried face. Letting out a shaky breath you blink the tears out of your eyes. “I’m just sad Rhys. I know I have you, but I feel so alone.”

Rhys’s face dropped into a deep frown. He knew you missed your friends. Though he was unaware how much it affected you until now. “I want life to keep going, and I want to keep doing things. I’m just not in a good place.”

Rhys wiped your tears away and held his arms open for you. Leaning forward you embrace the love of your life, letting your tears fall. “I’m so sorry. I’m here to support you through whatever you want to do y/n. I want what will make you happy.” “Thank you, Rhys.” You sniffled out.

The two of you sat like that for the rest of the day. Rhys helped you come up with new things you could. Encouraging you to step out of your comfort zone and even take Mor up on a night out. He even made you laugh.

You felt like a weight had been lifted of your shoulders after talking to Rhys. You had hope that things would change soon.

[saltminerising]

praying this doesn't sound bitchy or overdramatic since this is partially a joke but the way the fr team will be like "it's okay... we'll let you make one new account capiche? 😊" after closing a decade-old account for 1 forgotten instance of multi accounting in 2016 kills me. like thanks but i just lost dragons i'd had since i was out playing warrior cats at recess with my friends. i'd been playing with these dragons and collecting items and talking on the fourms on this account almost every single day through grade 8 to college. i appreciate the merciful offer to let me start on an entirely new account and i will always hold a part of this game close to my heart but you gotta be fucking crazy if you think i'm just gonna hop back on like that ever again (1/2)

and it is probably gonna sound biased but as a now former fr player who'd been playing since this game's public release, i genuinely cannot believe the team hasn't implemented a strike system of sorts. it'd literally solve so many issues and so much heartache caused by this type of situation. like damn. perma-closing peoples accounts after years of playing because one isolated instance of multiaccounting 8 years ago that hasn't been replicated since is just bonkers. i've seen so many other games both smaller, larger, older, and younger that have strike systems implemented so players who make a mistake don't lose years of work and progress from a singular, isolated violation that happened years ago and have an actual separation from repeat offenders also... why couldn't they have just closed kid me's account back in 2016 for the multiaccounting ...??? like, i would've still been pretty heartbroken back then, but at least i would've been losing an account only a few years old rather than one A DECADE OLD? should've just booted me when i was 3 years in instead of letting me go on for another 7 years cluelessly before then deciding to ban me for an alt account i hadn't touched since i was a kid LOLLLL (2/2) sorry god those previous anons sounded really salty i seriously hope i do not sound like a karen or something here i am just very sad to suddenly lose 10 years worth of love and work due to a mistake i didn't even remember making as a kid until they closed my account. i hope it doesn't come off as chronically online or anything considering this is a pixel game at the end of the day, but a whole decade of playing this game almost daily since childhood is a very long time so it does sort of feel like a big deal 😶 (+ extra/2)

[bloggingboutburgers]

cw: discussions of bullying and aphobia

Hearing aroace peoples' existential crises over their friends discussing crushes, as someone who was socially isolated and severly bullied for their whole childhood and most of their adolescence so had NO friendgroup until adulthood and NO community or inclusion in literally anything (and when it came to sex and romance the other kids explicitly considered my potential involvement in either to be impossible / laughible because of how "weird" they found me (my autistic traits before I even realised I'm autistic)), felt like starving while listening to someone else complain about the food they're actively eating.

Food intolerances and dislike of different foods (as metaphor for being aro/ace) ARE important and difficult to grapple with when you're expected to eat specific foods in specific proportions at different times - but man did it sting until I realised why I felt that way and gave myself a talking to since my trauma doesn't justify belittling the very real struggles of aroace people.

I guess since the choice between 'stay alone or conform' was never really a choice because I was rejected no matter how cis straight or allo I was it taught me to go "fuck it" and accept myself regardless of what other people do or say (which ironically has lead to me becoming dramatically popular all of a sudden at uni, which has been weird to get used to since I have literally no experience with any of this - platonic or otherwise - which did lead to some advantage being taken of me but f*ck it we ball ^^'). And I guess it's just been difficult understanding why anyone would care so much about whether they're "normal" or not? You really have nothing to gain from that, safety is not guaranteed in conformity so best to live aroace and damn all aphobes to hell if they have a problem with that.

It's a mindset I'll never understand and that's only ok now insofar as that lack of understanding no longer results in misplaced anger at people who, for a time, I had once considered spoilt, ungrateful and out of touch. Basically, I'm full of sh*t and to every aroace person reading this you deserve good friends that actually respect you for who you are and do not even TRY to get you to change your mind about sex or romance. Have a lovely day x

Sincerely,

An aggressive emotional support anon

I'm genuinely sorry for all the hardships you went through. I don't mean to equate at all, truthfully from reading you and considering I WAS asked some of those questions as a kid regardless (the "who's your crush" bullshit and whatnot), it definitely sounds like I had it less hard than you did, but... I was bullied in elementary school and middle school, also not necessarily because I was aroace (I don't know why it happened really, I don't know if anyone ever knows, I boil it down to... me being me and there being something fundamentally wrong with me ig), and I definitely also get some of those feelings of "oh boo hoo you call that struggle" boiling in me when people discuss their own past struggles sometimes, so... Yeah, every one person's experience is unique, but I can at the very least very much sympathize.

I think a way it manifests in me is that I now have that compulsive, debilitating fear of being "othered" in any way, shape, or form, so I guess being aroace doesn't help my case. But at the same time... Well, like you brilliantly put it, when you're in a situation like that, no matter what you do, you won't be accepted anyway, and having that knowledge back then is probably also what lead me to figure myself out as aroace so early in life. Because I was treated as this much of an outsider, I ironically had that much room in my own head to form my own identity, far apart from others and the need to conform. Yeah, that identity may include a "piece of shit that doesn't deserve to be supported of part of a group" side that's been forced in, buried deep down and can't be erased, but... It also includes asexual and aromantic, and it's been cemented so hard from so early with such self-affirmation that later down the line, it saved me from a lot of stuff. I never had to force myself into a romantic or sexual relationship because I was undoubtably aroace – and people saw me as an outsider and an eyesore anyway. I spent years of being scared to go to school or out in the street every day, but later down the line, somehow, I feel it saved me from doing so many things I wouldn't have wanted to do.

...Bleh, sorry, didn't mean to turn this into me-me-me crap when you had the courage and sincerity of not only showing your experience, but finding the strength to show more love, understanding and support than a lot of people probably cared to give you for so long, despite all the pain you felt for so long. I guess I just wanna say... This take is definitely inspiring, so thank you on behalf of myself and others I'm sure, but also... I hope that, for yourself, you're also managing to own what you lived through in a way that allowed you to affirm yourself more strongly (it sounds like you are, I hope it IS the case), and most importantly, I hope you're in a much better place in your life now and you'll never have to return to that level of loneliness again.

[kitmoas]

maimed underneath wreckage

TGU--Season 2 Installation 1

Warnings: **18+ ONLY** **MINORS DNI*** Mommy Kink, light talk of breeding, hostage talk, light degrading, talk of weapons and magic

as usual if I missed anything let me know!

Author's Notes: IT"S SEASON 2!!! Hi Hello, the beginning of season 2 is here! It's a day late and I'm sorry. Also no editing cause fuck that shit I'm sorry if there's mistakes. Hopefully its a good intro to the vibes of season 2 :) Lemme know your thoughts even if you wanna stay anon in my inbox

Training Grounds Master List | Navigation Post | Inbox

Flickering, a small flame breathing in air as it grows slowly. Despite the darkness and the isolation, it almost feels as though the world is solid. Firm and rooted in a good foundation, but it won’t take long for that to crumble. Falling, spiraling about as if gravity no longer exists. 

Nothing in this place had longevity, changing within a single breath, a flaw in its creation. The insatiable need for peace drove the inevitable hysteria, and that’s where the structure falters. Slowly everything will become normal once more, forcing a reality check in which will leisurely chip away at the sanity within. 

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The sounds of conversations mixing is a nice change to the beeping of the lab and the clicking of keys in the office, a light wind blowing through your hair as you allow your eyes to laze around your surroundings. The heat lamp next to you allowed for you to sit atop the roof despite the snow along the grass under the balcony. Having spent the past few months keeping your head down after your first semester into your masters, it was nice to finally be back to something a little more normal. A moment between everyone that feels cozy, and you even feel comfortable with the arm that lays along the back of your chair. 

Empty plates are scattered and you know that your brother is confused, and a bit off put, but you try to ignore it. This isn’t where you thought you would be, but it’s okay. Life is a rollercoaster and you need to start understanding that, you cannot control everything nor can you put someone else in control of the levers. You need to move on, learn to take the hits like an adult and live. 

The talk was light the entire lunch, almost cordial which felt weird,and maybe you should have taken that as a sign that this was destined for doom but you shrugged it off. You were here for fun and not everything had to be serious, which made your skin crawl because you knew that wasn’t the same mindset of the girl next to you but it was the one you were stuck in. 

“So have you thought anymore about Peter’s offer?” It never happened on purpose, the dreaded swing back. An end to almost every interaction that you have with anyone at this point, never really detangling yourself from those that left your world rocky. 

You know your brother doesn’t mean it maliciously, but you can’t help but glare at him every single time he brings up the offer. A step into the same world as those that used to be your pillars, the ones that created your world as it once had been. 

Sighing, your eyes divert as you notice the hopeful look of both your lunch companions. “You know I haven’t Cars, you know that it isn’t the only offer I have and there’s no reason to even entertain it. I have school.” Despite the want for your voice to be strong, almost commanding, it wavers on each syllable. “I don’t need another distraction. I want to do well.” 

Before you even finish you can sense the change in his body language, jaw stiffening and eyes rolling. “Personally I think it’s time you stop running from what you’re actually good at.” 

Your mouth opens, just slightly, as your tongue dips out to wet your lips. “You know damn well that I won’t ever truly become part of that world, not full time.” The low simmering anger, the one that exists in you at all times, starts to heat up. You know where this is going, where it has gone for the past couple months. 

“Running from dad and who he was isn’t going to make you happy, we both know that.” The words were out of his mouth, put out into the world, but it was almost like you lost your ability to hear. It wasn’t healthy, your coping mechanism with your father, and you know that but at the end of the day you still weren’t ready to change. It almost felt too familiar, too cozy, and the thought of more change scared you. 

An answer for his statement never came, just your footsteps in the light layer of already melting snow as you walked back into the building. The loud chatter within the food court of your student union masking your emotions, as Cassie stumbled to thank your brother for having a meal with the both of you. Only the brief reflection of them parting indicated what happened at the scene you left behind as you conceal yourself within the wave of people all heading for the coffee bar. 

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A small stack of papers go flying through the air, hand slamming down on the large oval table. “We can’t keep acting like expansion is impossible! The world needs different types of technology so let’s give it to them!” Kate leers over the table, glaring at the projection of their end of year statements. 

You could feel the tension in the room, everyone was just a bit too scared to fight their boss. “Ms. Bishop, what….what would you mother do in this moment?” Apparently not everyone was scared, a single older man raising his hand with a strict look on his face. 

The young girl blinks, straightening her back as she stares down the table. Her jaw sets and she uses the moment of quiet to smooth down her blazer lapels. Kate settles down in her chair, allowing the smooth soft leather to calm her down more before she speaks. “Maybe you should remember where my mother got this company, yes? At the brink of forced federal shutdown, and practically bankrupt when our combined assets were seized. She destroyed the reputation of this company, disruption within the entire field, because she wanted to be rich. When I took the seat, and responsibility, of this company I swore that I would bring it back to what it could be but you all want to stay what my mother created. If that is true then security can escort you out because I will not be working with criminals. Meeting is dismissed and you all are required to go home, do not return to this building until or unless your mindset changes. We are not villains in this company and I will not entertain the idea of such ideals either.” 

Slowly each person leaves, shock on their face after being practically punished by such a young girl. They had always thought that she would be a fun loving kid, the one that was barely a good secretary but they knew she was growing into a good firm CEO. 

Letting the door lock behind the last person to leave, Kate leans back with her feet on the wood table. Sighing she rubs her hand along her face, staring out at the skyline. Her mind drifts as she tries to settle her heart rate. Memories of her favorite times plague her mind.  

“You wouldn’t dare, Mutt!” Her words held no real venom, voice cracking with laughter as she tried her hardest to keep the nerf gun aimed properly. The ginger staring down Kate as she holds you in a chokehold, her own gun against your temple. 

The body behind you shifts, the arm loose around your neck. “Bring it on, old lady, I’ll pull the trigger. I ain’t no scared lil bitch!” Everyone in the room cracks up at your girlfriend’s random accent that she puts on. 

Neither of you noticed Wanda, hovering in the back, eyes gleaming ruby. Just a tilt of her head and the brunette’s nerf gun is hovering above her hand, the two of you separated slowly. Her hands land on you and Nat is tackling Kate next to you. “Well hello, my little one. No one keeps you hostage but me, understood?” Her voice is deep, smooth as her lips move directly against your ear. 

The sight of the ginger straddling the younger girl below you, hand wrapped around her throat as the two kiss messily. You can’t help the whimper that falls from your mouth, teeth tugging at your bottom lip as you try to focus on the feeling of Wanda’s hands on you, but you can’t help as your attention is pulled to the wetness growing between your thighs as you watch the beginning of dry humping. 

“Now, if Mommy’s little girl doesn’t start paying attention I’m not going to be able to take care of that issue growing between your pretty little thighs. Are you my brainless obedient hostage or not?” Her nails grips at your hips now, digging painfully into you as she tugs you backwards into her. Her bulge is prominent as she grinds purposefully into your ass. 

You can’t help but get lost in the sensation, arching your back as much as you can to feel more of the woman behind you. The sound of the witch’s annoyed sigh only turns you on more, as she lets one of her hands claw at your jaw–forcing you to nod your head. “Such a stupid little slut already?” Her other hand is pushing its way into your pants, fingers roughly swiping along your wet folds. “Do you want to play a game with Mommy?” 

Even though you are eagerly nodding your head, the claws that dig into you are forcing your head up and down as well. A sharp whistle makes you flinch, the piercing sound right in your ear as the woman behind you calls for the attention of the others. “It’s time for the puppy to learn how to breed our pretty little fucktoy.” 

Kate practically falls out of her chair at a gentle knock, the door disengaging as her secretary pops her head in. “Are you staying late? I can stay so you're not alone.” Her sympathetic smile makes the young brunette feel almost pathetic. 

Pulling herself up, politely she dismisses her and lets her know that she too is heading out. That she has a busy night ahead of her with some very important plans, but had just lost track of time. The brunette spends the next few minutes cleaning up, taking great care to make sure that her co-worker is fully out of the building before starting her descent down the stairs. A heavy sigh as she pulls up Doordash for some random pizza shop, trying once more to find a place that can take the place of her once favorite parlor.  -----------------------------------------------------------------------

Crickets softly chirp, a sound in the early night that still brings a soft smile to the blonde’s face, under the slowly raising moon. A chill is settling over the dead grass and bare branches, a sure indicator that another night time snow fall is approaching. It’s been a while since she felt like this, everyone around her had been so stressed out and tense but she just wanted the world back as she had fallen in love with it. That’s selfish but it’s what she wanted, even though she knows that the pain and despair she is going through is bare minimum compared to her closest people. 

“You know, when we were younger mom would also find you fallen asleep out here. She used to say that you were meant for the night. Viridescent in the moonlight.” Natasha’s smile is forced, and her younger sister can see it from a mile away. It had been for months now, if not even longer but it’s only gotten worse as each day passed.  

The hum is soft, barely loud enough to even be noted in the noise of nature. “I miss them.” Her voice breaks causing her to flinch at the obvious weakness she displayed, a quick flash too early in the conversation. 

Wrapping her arms around the blonde, the older woman takes a moment to press a kiss to her temple before rocking with her. “They loved you so much Y. You don’t even understand. When you came to us, god, that was it. We were complete and we all wanted to protect you so much. I wish we would have done a better job, we kind of failed there.” Even as the ginger looks out into the yard, a newly installed play gym shines in the dim light, she can’t help but let her mind wander to some of the best years she had in this neighborhood. 

“You…Sha, you say Mama and Daddy loved me and I knew that but why do step straight to them?” Yelena blinks up at her sister, relishing in the first sign of emotion from her. She watches her contemplate for a while, silence filled with the chirping of crickets, before she stutters out a few syllables. It ends in a stubborn snap of her jaw, the muscles there tensing as she clenches her mouth shut. “I just believe that they would enjoy it here. We will reunite with Mama soon and maybe by the grace of the gods Daddy will show, but we have people we love here. They once said that we find love grasp on tight, you remember?” 

Natasha nods, hot heavy tears filling her eyes. Forcing them down, she tries to chuckle. “The idea of that man being graced by the gods is hilarious, if anything that man would make it back to Yav in the form of one of Mom’s pigs.” At the dead end glare she receives the older woman gulps, trying to collect her thoughts. “Okay, I had to walk away. Okay? Okay. I think everyone can agree that I had to. I had no other choice but to remove myself from the situation. It wasn’t fun or nice but I had to. I had to. I had to Y. Okay?” It wasn’t on purpose but her voice was getting louder and her younger sister could see the anger and desperation rising in her. 

Pulling away to sit directly facing her sister, Yelena takes a deep breath as she goes through her thoughts. She knew that it wasn’t going to be easy and that she needed to take her time, but at the same time it had to be direct and quick to make sure that Natasha didn’t run. “The situation did not require leaving, you should never leave and even Daddy spoke to that. Do you not realize that staying would have allowed you to growth instead of leaving and the entire would becoming rubble?” Internally she flinched, the words spoken were harsh but she knew what she wanted out of this. At the end of the day, she herself was angry. Her sister walked away, without a fight, and the blonde knew that she was in the wrong. No matter how much she may idolize her older sibling she has to knock her off that pedestal once in a while. 

The two sit there, for almost an hour, in silence. It’s agonizing and tedious, a feat that almost feels athletic but it ends with Yelena retreating. A gentle kiss to the ginger’s forehead as she sighs, shaking her head and heading back into the house to allow her to have some time in a calm isolation. 

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Your brow was dripping slightly, the back of your hand doing barely anything to stop the droplet from stinging your eyes. A chorus of laughter echoes in your ears as you stare down at the facetime call, both Peter and America are frantically running towards your shared destination. “Okay, whoever gets there first needs to make sure that they try and get them to honor our reservation!” 

The boy yelps as he nods, the world rushing as he swings towards the science wing of campus. “I’m gonna beat you both!” He’s laughing loudly as he flips about, and for a moment everything almost seems normal. Just a couple college friends trying to finish some research, all of you aiming to practically overdose on caffeine. 

Trying to focus on not tripping as you exit the gym and keep up with conversation as America runs across campus, the rapid wind being Peter’s only real contribution to the call, you almost miss running straight into someone. Dropping your phone, the dreaded clatter never came and you realize that the beloved item is hovering within a glowing red orb. 

“You truly are just a clumsy little thing, you know?” Her voice is quiet, almost hesitant, as she looks up at you through her lashes. 

Frantically reaching up to your air pod you hang up your call before your friends can realize who you just ran into, literally, as you try to scramble your brain into thinking of any sort of retort. “Um.. I-” Your vision blurs slightly, but it’s then you realize she’s still crystal clear. The world around her is blurry and fogged, but as per usual she’s the brightest thing to exist. 

She smiles, a sullen thing pulling her lips, and shakes her head. “I just missed you, but you don’t have to reply.” A quick shush stops your arguing and her eyes dim for a moment. “It’s not fair of me but I just wanted to see you, just for a moment. I could never stay too far away from you for long could I?” There’s a slight cocky tone to her voice as she expresses her thoughts, her body straightening as she realizes you still react the same way towards her. 

“Why.. um.. Why didn’t you call me? I would have answered. I always would.” You try to reassure her or maybe that’s all for you, but you can’t help the words as they pour out of you. “You don’t need to miss me, I’m always at your access if you need me. We always promised that and I don’t ever want to break that promise.” 

The older woman chuckles, almost in spite of herself while she takes a few steps away. Her magic forces its way into your hand as it sets your phone there, waiting patiently for you to catch up to what was happening. It’s the last thing you feel, her scent pulling away as she moves farther backwards.

Gentle vibration that you cling to, but you never got to say goodbye as the entire world melts into nothing.  -----------------------------------------------------------------------

The door closes behind her, a barely warm pizza in hand. It doesn’t smell very appetizing, but anything with cheese should do the trick nowadays. The feeling is instant, the box hitting the counter without a sound. An arrowhead slips down her fingers almost at an instant, swinging around the young girl tries to play her paranoia off casually but her shock is something she can’t. There bent over the chair is Wanda, almost in a frantic state. Her face is flushed and wet with tear stains. Her demeanor is nothing like the CEO is used to but she knows their lives have changed a lot. “W-Wanda? Are you okay? What happened?” Her concern for not only the woman in front of her, but those that connect the two takes over. 

“Please I just want to see someone, anyone. Please. Where is Tommy? Billy? I’m begging you, I’ll do anything.” The woman is sobbing, the words slurring together as she struggles to stand up. There were dark circles under her eyes, and her frame was thin. It almost looked like she had spent weeks searching for these people, but Kate was completely confused. Who was she even speaking of? Did she find a whole new group in just a couple of months? 

Taking a step towards the crouched older woman was a mistake, causing her to practically fling herself backwards. For the first time the young girl stopped, head tilting in confusion and her hand falling to her side, Wanda was scared. It was something that she never saw before, and felt like even on the battlefield she had never even seen an ounce of hesitation from her. 

Slowly Kate slips to the floor, setting the arrowhead out in front of her so that she could seem less like a threat. “Hi, Wanda? Do you know who I am?” She was starting to think that maybe she suffered some kind of brain injury or maybe she was on some sort of drug. 

The frantic woman’s bloodshot eyes snap to match the calm dark waves, and it seems to help her breath a bit better. She shakes her head, pushing away until her back can hit the wall. “I don’t… I don’t know who you are. Am I supposed to?” 

It was a possibility, a small chance, and Kate knew that it was there but hearing it stung. A woman that not only did she look up to but also had grown a large liking to doesn’t know who she is. Though the hurt was sharp, and overwhelming, the young hero tried her hardest to ignore it. She had to save the woman in front of her, she had to make sure that she was taken somewhere that they could restore her memory. 

As gently as possible the archer reaches out, palm upwards. “Can I touch you?” Her voice was soft, almost as if she was talking to a sleeping baby. At the shy nod of Wanda’s head, she smiles. It’s not a beam or bright, but almost like the beginning rays of the sunrise–soft and warm. 

Her hand never makes it there, never touching what looks like a soft sweater, instead the world blacks out and it almost feels like Kate falls into a black hole. 

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Natasha had grown accustomed to darkness, the time of day when even the moon goes to bed. It happened to be one of her favorite times of the day, a peace that was laid over her like a blanket. When everyone else wanted to do everything during the day, she just wanted to wait for the shadow of night. She worked and thought best at the latest of times, and sometimes that backfired on her; as it was currently. 

She knew that her world was crumbling, but didn’t the destruction start two years ago? The daily life she had created was put on a pause and when she was able to hit play again, the script was rewritten. She was so far behind on rewrites and the new cast members that catching up was impossible, so she went along with what she knew. 

It’s not like she didn’t enjoy everything, nor did she not finally fall into a groove but the foundation she created was not the one everyone stood on. No, instead it had almost felt like a bridge–one laid upon the old foundation. It was strong but it was heavy upon the slowly cracking stone holding it up, time was the only thing in the way of the wreckage. 

For now this was her life, time in the neighborhood that could have been her identity. She could have been part of that family across the way, the one that is sleeping soundly currently and will wake up and get their children to school before heading to work. Maybe she would have been part of the couple that have three dogs and a cat, and work remote jobs so that they can travel the world together. 

Gulping down a thought, she hates to have the visions cross her mind. It could have been her and maybe someone else. Someone else right next to her, smiling and laughing; crying and healing. They could have survived the world together, but the fights would be corporate life and monthly bills. The two of them could have dogs and a cat or two, maybe even a kid if they really wanted. It’s a vision she sees every time she lets her eyes scan the backyard, fairy lights now twinkling dimly to allow enough lighting for safety. 

It’s then when she sees two small crimson orbs, floating. A sense of dread and urgency sinks in her stomach, her fight or flight kicking in and the need to grasp at her widow bites strong. As the circles approach, the figure being illuminated by the string of twinkling dots, Natasha realizes the familiar feeling. Taking her back to Sokovia twelve years ago, she realizes Wanda is the one once again hiding in the shadows; but this time Strucker is not a part of it. 

“Well hello Agent Romanoff.” Her voice was deeper, a bit of that old rage still there. “What are you doing out here, all alone?” 

Despite the girl being far enough out that Natasha could easily escape her, she still felt an overwhelming sense of danger. She knew what this Wanda was capable of, even if it was barely a fraction of what current age Wanda could do, and that was enough for her to let her widow bites activate. She doesn’t give the young girl the sense of pride to speak back to her, just stand at the ready. She couldn’t let her have a moment of the upper hand, she refused to feel her hex again. 

Wanda tilts her head, a mockingly curious look on her face. “Why do you seem so scared, aren’t you the great Black Widow?” She smiles widely, every single one of her teeth shining a faint red as her eyes pulse with her magic. “Or maybe it’s because your best friend Tony Stark isn’t here?” 

Blinking, slowly, Natasha tries to piece together what was happening. What does she mean? Did she lose her memory in the past couple months? Originally she had thought that maybe her magic had consumed her and that it reverted her back to a darker sense of dress, but the way she speaks isn’t something she understands. 

The one thing she is conscious of is the growing ruby orb rolling around in Wanda’s left hand, and the rapidly expanding magic glow around her. The presence of the magic was stronger than almost every moment Natasha had ever seen of the other woman. It scared her and that was the only thing that saved her as she jumped out of the way of the impending attack. 

Except it never happened, the world blurring almost as if her magic stole the ginger’s sight. 

------------------------------------------------------------------------

Chaos, that’s the only word that can really describe what is happening. It’s only a moment after the world blacked out, only a moment since three lives were blurred and melted back together. 

You didn’t really understand what happened, just a moment ago you  were staring at Wanda for the first time in months and now you were in some random room with people freaking out all around you. She was standing, somewhat away, trapped in a box. She looked confused, but almost at peace, and you wanted to help her. She had been caged before and you never wanted her to ever feel like that again. You didn’t even get to take one step towards her before you watched her start to glitch, almost like a computer screen, before she just disappeared. 

Swinging your head around you tried to find someone who would tell you what was happening, but that’s when you saw her. Kate, your archer, wait no. Kate. Just Kate. She was on her knees, talking to another Wanda who was curled up in a ball crying. It was only another second before that one turned to static. You watched as the brunette frantically stood up, begging for help from the first person she could find. 

Next to her, with shocked eyes, stood Natasha. Her arm is held up by the CEO as her voice gets caught in her throat, but her other hand is outstretched to where a crimson fog is dissipating. The two stare at each other for a moment before Kate apologizes, trying to leave the situation in a professional way. 

In the crowd you blend in, hiding yourself as agents and other Avengers run around. There’s screens and machines all around, things you don’t really understand as everyone is trying to piece together what could be happening. You almost couldn’t tell if you wanted to be seen by the other girl, or even by the widow. Your soul and heart craved her attention, and you knew that your body would relax just from the sight of the ginger’s eyes, but how could you look at them? You had destroyed their lives and now you must live in the ruins of it. 

“ENOUGH!” The loud voice of Dr. Strange freezes everyone, and for a time you think you’re safe. It’s until everyone turns to you, the summoning from the stupid wizard, that for the first time you drown in the salty blue of the eyes you missed most. It was pain, a stabbing through your soul that you knew you would never survive. The need for her attention, even the most miniscule amount of it, was like oxygen. You need it to live, and for the past few months you had none. 

You weren’t sure what any one spoke of, people pushing and shoving not only you but the other two to the center of the floor. A large table there that now seated the rest of the Avengers, three empty chairs left. Even though there is yelling and arguing around, you can’t help but stop. You want to just look at them, forcing your eyes away from Kate was a mistake as you struggle to stay still. You wanted to run to the widow, get on your knees and beg her to come back. 

It was a clearing of a throat that interrupts your thoughts, stern and firm. “We need to discuss Wanda.”

[littledollll]

Hi honey! It's your fave anon ever hehe

Can I request cg!larissa x little!borderline!reader?

Maybe R has had an awful day, like every insecurity rising to the surface and she's on the verge of splitting but she really doesn't want to so when Larissa comes home, she sees that R has locked herself in the bathroom accidentally scaring Larissa but actually she was just isolating herself because she was terrifked Larissa would see her as a monster, but actually Larissa knowa of it all and loves R more than anything so she weasles her way into the bathroom with a blanket and a paci and lots of little stuff and R just ends up regressing and safely avoiding splitting as Larissa takes care of her and falls asleep on her chest and gets carried to bed? I'm sorry if this is too much

-🧸 anon

Forever? Forever.

Larissa Weems x little!bpd!reader

Extra prompt- “R is anxious when Isa is busy and fully develops into an attack but they try to mask until they just leave the room knowing they can't do it much more. Isa, can't follow yet and feels so bad because she knows her little has abandonment issues so will interpret it the situation as being left. Then we get upset little drawing pictures to show feelings and comforting momma isa” -🕊️anon

A/n: Hi its 1:30 am when I’m writing this! back at it again my friends. It’s nice to be (sorta) up to date with requests again! Also 🧸anon i see u 👀 I swear ur like 3/5 requests I have, it’s truly an honor.

Warnings: mentions of splitting, anxiety, overthinking, abandonment issues, little r, momma Larissa, comfort.

Dear 🧸anon, can I bring you back to life with the gift of a fluffy Larissa fic?

♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡

A busy Larissa wasn’t something new, usually as much as you hated it, it didn’t cause much of a problem. You found ways to be with her even as she worked her life away and you’ve grown quite used to it. The problem was today. You couldn’t quite pinpoint what exactly triggered your anxiety, you just felt alone, abandoned even though in the back of your mind you were well aware of Larissa’s affections for you.

Anxiety was always quick to push you into splitting, you couldn’t have that. Not now that you’ve been doing better, not while Larissa is cluelessly busy working. She was supposed to be home soon as well. What was taking so long? Did she not want to come home to you? Overthinking was always your worst enemy, specially now.

Naturally, you hid. Having Larissa see you in this state wasn’t going to be of any help, specially if you acted out against her. At the same time you missed her so badly. You just wanted her to hold you and tell you how much she still loved you. But you hid. If she wanted you she’d come looking for you right? That was your logic anyways.

You locked yourself in the bathroom of your shared room, bringing your knees up to your chest and hiding your face between them. You didn’t really have much else to do, just wait it out, just wait for the anxiety and that feeling of a split coming on to fade away, it wouldn’t. You closed your eyes. You felt like crying, and what was the point in holding back now?

♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡

You hadn’t noticed you fell asleep until the sound of Larissa calling for you startled you awake, then your heard it again followed by the shaking of the doorknob. “Darling- are you in here? could you just answer me so I know you’re okay?” You could hear the concern in her voice and willed yourself to unlock the door, still giving her no reply.

She let herself in, seeing your tear stricken face she immediately kneeled down and cupped your face. “My sweet girl, why are you crying what’s wrong?” You couldn’t bring yourself to explain, not mentally or physically and Larissa immediately knew. She kissed your forehead and stood, walking out to the bedroom.

This left you confused. Was she leaving you? If she was why would she kiss you so gently before doing so? It just made you want to cry more, you curled into yourself and did just that.

Larissa was at your side in mere seconds. Pulling you into her lap and offering up your paci and one of your stuffies. “Momma just needed to get some things for her baby, you see?” you nodded, hiding into her neck. “no leavs” Larissa sighed, hugging you tightly. “No my darling. Mommas not going anywhere, I promise. I apologize for leaving so suddenly without explaining.”

You sat there as she rubbed your back for god knows how long. She didn’t pull away until all your cries were soothed, your stuffie hugged between your bodies and paci in your mouth. Her always calm voice felt so comforting as she shushed your cries and eased every single one of your worries with quiet reassurance. She held your face studying you and then squinted at you, managing to pull a quiet giggle from you.

“My pretty little one, you know there’s nothing in this world momma loves more than her baby right?” You gave her a little gasp and shyly snuggled into her chest “It’s true. You’re my little treasure and momma absolutely adores you!” you hugged her as tightly as you could and responded as if it was a secret, “I adores momma evn mores”

“There’s absolutely no way! You’re my precious girl, I have all the love in the world just for you.” It was exactly what you needed. Being held and reassured by her for however long you asked.

You comfortably curled up in her arms, wanting to sleep off your headache from all the crying and Larissa was quick to carefully carry you into bed. She laid with you on her chest, the sound of her heartbeat calming you further. Just as you closed your eyes Larissa spoke again in a soft tone.

“Rest well my sweet girl, momma loves you” you nuzzled further into her, “forevers?” “Forever.” It was the perfect goodnight.

[liesmyth]

Any fiction recommendations? I’ve repeatedly read Locked Tomb, natch. I’d love something similarly brainwork inducing but maybe a touch lighter. Also not fantasy or sci fi…I need something to listen to while I do a ton of chores, and those can be hard (for me) because the unfamiliar proper nouns get confusing. :/

anon!! I'm terrible at reccing anything based on “if you liked TLT” because TLT is like five different genres in a trench coat, but I TRIED (⭐) Here are some brainworm-y recs that aren't sff — where by brainworm-y I mean that they stayed with me for a while after I finished them, but aren't overly confusing. (most of them are books, but available on audio)

Podcasts: a tumblr pal recced me the deviser based on me liking the eldritch elements of tlt; it's short and horror-y, and I really enjoyed it.

I haven't checked out the new TMA yet but I see many TLT peeps who are enjoying it (or S1 of the original The Magnus Archives could be a good entry point if you haven't ever listened to it)

TV: Unfortunately I hardly ever watch live action stuff BUT if you haven't seen either IWTV (the series not the film) or Yellowjackets, I do rec those! There's a lot of overlap between these fans and TLT fandom on my dash. His Dark Materials also goes hard and you might enjoy it (dysfunctional characters! worldbuilding! religious weirdness!) but it has more sff elements than other stuff I've recced. Oddball out of nowhere but The Great is a fun show if you enjoy the meme moments of TLT + people being gleefully horrible + having feelings despite your best intentions

Animanga: Utena (!!!!!) also Fullmetal Alchemist Brotherhood, which occupies a very similar space to TLT in my brain

Books!

✧ I went through my “women unhinged” goodreads shelf and found some books that are avaliable in audio format, and might appeal. These are wildly varied in scope and ngl the criterion was just “at least one person (besides myself) who enjoyed tlt also this book” and the similarities stop there. It's all vibes baby! Still, I tried

my heart is a chainsaw by stephen graham jones (horror, slasher), bunny by mona awad (horror, wildly unhinged), the witching hour by anne rice (horror, gothic)

matrix by lauren groff (historical, lesbian nuns), anything by sarah waters (historical fiction + lesbians), rebecca by daphne du maurier (historical, gothic)

the plot by jean hanff korelitz (litfic, thriller), sadie by courtney summers (thriller, coming of age). anything by gillian flynn (thrillers with terrible women).

✧ I really enjoy Tana French thrillers for the strong sense of place, great prose, and the complete emotional turmoil of her character-centric narratives. If anything sounds up your alley, I enjoyed the witch's elm + dublin murder squad series. They're murder mystery procedural but the messy characters really elevate the novels. Available in audiobook also

✧ American Elsewhere, technically scifi but set in New Mexico. Somehow, cosmic horrors who have taken over a quaint little town and worse! They are enforcing HETERONORMATIVITY upon it! They also have tentacles. The main character rocks

✧ Sundial by Catriona Ward: insane, gripping psychological horror. A mother and her unsettling daughter take a trip to the isolate desert ranch where the main chracter grew up. Surrounded by unsettling science experiments

✧ A Touch of Jen by Beth Morgan: when the parasocial relationship is so strong, it accidentally summons a hellmonster from another dimension

✧ SFF adjacent, sorry, but set in the real world (historical, tho) — Cuckoo Song by Frances Hardinge, a middle grade novel with fairytale elements that gave me more brainworms than any kids book ought to, mostly because I LOVED the main character. She occupies a very similar place in my brain as Gideon does. This is actually the only book on the list that I'm not sure is available in audio format, but if you get a chance and it's up your alley, I'd check it out

I hope there's at least ONE thing you'll like in here! lmk (also. lmk if you don't have access to a way to borrow audiobooks but would like to)

[olderthannetfic]

https://olderthannetfic.tumblr.com/post/741535020460736512/httpswwwtumblrcomolderthannetfic740933819656

It's funny because as another academic (not anon), I feel like I've seen a lot of takes that use a media text to interrogate the bigotry of the larger culture in interesting ways. I don't think academia or anything is averse to that kind of take, and I think that up-and-coming scholars can get a lot of attention with that if they do it right.

I think honestly that some of the reason that pointing the fingers at fandom stuff specifically gets attention is something even more so than the "misogyny is always popular" or "fandom drama is popular." I think especially when you're presenting to academics who are not primarily focused on fandom, it's fascinating to them to get this glimpse into this subculture that they don't understand and that's why you get special attention for that; it's the sort of voyeuristic, touristic aspect of it.

And oh my god I'm sorry I totally sound like a person with a Ph.D. right now, but idk how else to phrase this. But I think it's interestingly kind of a similar impulse to the long troubling history of anthropology and related disciplines of finding some isolated tribe in Africa, New Guinea, etc. and just observing some ritual they did and going "isn't that interesting! isn't that different!" (in fancier language, of course) and academics slurping that up in this way that almost feels like the way you clap at a seal performing a trick in a zoo exhibit.

It makes it interesting that people who seem to bank so much on how progressive they and their research are don't realize that they're playing into this. But while it's obviously not the same degree of "problematic" when you're talking about largely Western, Anglophone women in fandom rather than like some isolated Amazon tribe - it's not as tied into like, justifications for colonialism for instance - I think there's still a really gross, condescending attitude toward it that you'd think people who are so Woque would realize is what is going on when they get people patting them on the head for saying that (if I'm following this right) women writing Star Trek DS9 fanfiction are racist for focusing on this character of color over this other character of color (writing that sentence just boggled my mind, I'm not into Star Trek but like is this person aware of how many fandoms have barely any POC in them at all, or there are POC but the fans continue to prefer the white characters? and you're complaining that your fandom is somehow racist for talking about - looking back at the previous post again - an Arab man over a black man????)

--

[stars-tonight]

hello! can I have a haikyuu matchup please ? since I’m doing this anon, i could be this 🎬emoji?

1. Long please!

2. I don’t really care probably platonic

3. pronouns : she/they pairing: guy

4. I don't really have any specific criteria but I think I would like someone who is responsible and independent but also patient as I often need my own space and may find it difficult to express my emotions and all that

5. I am rather calm and collected but can get pretty blunt and passive aggressive. I don’t what I could add, I'm reserved, but not shy, my defence mechanism is detachment and isolation and that’s all I can think of rn

6. I watch movies and read a lot (I like to read correspondence (but not really love letters, that kind of make me cringe tbh). I like sociology and photography. I also like filming, mostly landscapes (mostly urban), I prefer filming quiet places and I also love working with light, but I don't really like filming people (I do it on very rare occasions, if the person is important to me).

7. giving: acts of service receiving: I honestly don’t really care but I'm probably less comfortable with physical touch.

8. I don’t really know, I am fine with anything but going to the cinema or a café sounds cool to me.

thank you sm, have a great day!

headcanons

🥛 kita is the definition of responsible and independent

🥛 doesn't he literally scrub the urinals and dust the floors of the school bathroom

🥛 (i could never)

🥛 but yea kita is one of like five people who could probably survive if you randomly tossed them into the forest and said "good luck lol"

🥛 (the others being akaashi, kuroo, tsukishima, and kiyoko or something)

🥛 kita's also probably the most patient character, along with akaashi

🥛 he just works and works until he can reap what he sowed

🥛 prioritizes the process over the results lol

🥛 kita is also really blunt but not passive aggressive (at least not intentionally lol)

🥛 so he'd actually find snarky remarks pretty entertaining

🥛 although he'd prefer for you to just be straightforward if there's ever a problem

🥛 with him or just in general, he just doesn't like people who are fake

🥛 essentially doesn't see the point in lying about your thoughts or feelings

🥛 definitely the type to be brutally honest but he's always just trying to look out for you

🥛 if he isn't able to comfort you with words he'll find some other way

🥛 he'd probably get you your favorite food or something cute like a plushie

🥛 would do some of your chores for you to take the load off your back

🥛 kita would probably be naturally drawn to calm people

🥛 would encourage you to not isolate yourself and let others help you with any problems

🥛 he admires that you do photography and filming because those are hobbies that require a lot of patience and calmness

🥛 he doesn't get a lot of either in his life with the twins

🥛 you'd probably just spend hours next to each other while you find the perfect shot and he either patiently watches you or does homework

🥛 the friendship is silent with you two but never uncomfortable

🥛 i think i said before that kita's giving love language is quality time?

🥛 i'd like to add "acts of service" onto that list

🥛 because i rewatched the episode where atsumu is sick and kita gives him food and stuff

🥛 so yea he'd definitely take good care of his friends

🥛 he's also not a big physical touch guy so he wouldn't be overly clingy

runner up for you was akaashi keiji!

A/N: there you go 🎬anon, i hope you liked it! sorry about the long wait 🙈

[ayeforscotland]

Hello aye, this is going to sound kind of unhinged and tirade-y so I'm sorry but I need to vent and no one else I know thinks like you.

I miss the way my wife used to be before the pandemic, she was softer, kinder, and more accepting. But during the pandemic she got stuck inside for a year with nothing but her Google feed because I was still working in the local co-op at the time, and now she's kinda TERF-y and right wing because all she got was Jordan Peterson shit and right wing doomsayers, she has decried every action the Scottish government has taken with trans folk and feels that it should be dismantled. But she always spouts the same "it's not trans people who I dislike, it's the laws the Scottish government have put in place which endanger women." What's worse is I think the environment she grew up in is what caused it, her mum did at one point have a FRAMED PICTURE of Boris Johnson hanging in her kitchen.

I still very much love her, but it's breaking my heart.

I’m sorry to hear that anon, I’m not going to pretend I know what to do in this situation.

Social isolation during the pandemic let the right wing really run rampant, and a lot of their rhetoric was geared to prey on people who were lonely.

Have any old pre-pandemic habits returned? Is there something your wife used to do but has dropped? It might be worth trying to get back into those older habits whether that’s a club or a sport or whatever.

It might also be worth having a frank discussion about it. It’ll be a tough conversation to have but the longer you keep it bottled up, the greater the impact on your relationship.

[ikemenomegas]

oh, just meant your name 'Io'! sorry!

it's just very pretty, i like the mythology and sound of it lol

would any of your naruto! omegas be willing to share their alpha with one of the others, like a triad??

No need to apologize, I just had never heard that term before! Thank you for your kind words. It was a happy coincidence, and I'm lucky it works!

Achievement unlocked anon.... you've found one of my favorite things. Like raindrops on roses etc etc, poly au's make me smile. They usually require situations where things have gone particularly right or things are at least going right enough for a time. I'm also not a big fan of any kind of character vs character outright jealousness, and will preferentially pick a poly au instead.

Unusual pairings that require specific scenarios to come together are fun to do but I suck at coming up with them, so probably people have already done things with the pairings I think of, but that's fine.

(That said! I think you could come up with justifications for any triad you want to, but it always requires trust and communication to work.)

Possible poly ships:

cw: non graphic mentions of sex, polyamory, biology consistent with Kisame being a shark

Itachi x Reader x Shisui

For years I thought these two were cousins, which is a personal squick, but that seems to be more of a Uchiha fam au preference than reality so I could see Itachi being willing to share an Alpha with someone he trusted as much as Shisui. Even if they are willing to share with each other though, there is balance required in this pairing to allow Itachi and Shisui to remain friends. Romantic relationships are all well and good, but isolating yourself from the other people in your life because of them is not so good. Itachi in particular does not need more isolation. Shisui however I don't see as being particularly willing to share with anyone but Itachi and this scenario would happen only if Itachi and his Alpha wanted or needed to pull Shisui in for some reason.

Kakashi x Reader x Iruka

Kakashi seems less the sharing type and is contradictory in his interpersonal relationships. He's possessive and loyal yet detached. He might however get along in a romantic relationship with certain people. He teases Iruka with the aim to fluster but they get along well and Iruka has never been overawed by Kakashi's status or skill level, never afraid to challenge him. Unfortunately, my head is a bit empty about how these three would get together because it sort of needs to happen all at once. Either you and Kakashi start courting first and then add Iruka or somehow Kakashi claims you and Iruka simultaneously and then you and Iruka start courting each other. Kakashi is even more shy in this scenario than when it's just him and Alpha though, feels like he's asking too much of the universe.

Reader x Nagato x Yahiko x Konan

The order of these names is very key here. Through the limitations of not knowing any of the other people around him, and also knowing his friends are the only ones with his full implicit trust, I can only really see Nagato having a polycule in this kind of order. Konan doesn't like him at first the way an Alpha likes and Omega, but she does like to see Yahiko and Nagato happy and would be intrigued at the prospect of them finding pleasure in one another. I think Yahiko might be interested in knowing more about what Nagato sees in his Alpha, and Nagato would enjoy seeing Yahiko engage with his Alpha. Konan is really hot and she and Nagato's Alpha make out at least a few times while Nagato and Yahiko are doing the same. Konan eventually sleeps with Nagato, but it's the last thing that happens. It's nice because it opens opportunities to truly overwhelm him.

Reader x Itachi x Kisame (cw: mentions of eggs)

Another pairing where order matters. Itachi and his Alpha claim each other first, and then Kisame joins. I HC that Kisame's genetics don't align him with the usual a/b/o dynamics. (There's also a nonzero chance of eggs being involved.) Kisame also isn't affected by Itachi's heat the same way, and he doesn't bond the way an Alpha and Omega do. Kisame's instinct is to be a good protector and caretaker for Itachi based on respect alone, but realizing Itachi is capable of certain emotions awakens something in Kisame. He's not good with romantic feelings, doesn't really feel them at all. Itachi is still special though, and once his Alpha wins Kisame's respect from one predator to another, albeit of a different kind, he becomes curious about the different layers to their bond.

[Honorable mentions]

I could see Sai being open to having multiple Alphas, but not having another omega close enough in that way for that kind of triad, mostly because those omegas are already happily with another Alpha

Naruto and Sasuke could absolutely share an Alpha, they've shown their personalities to match in the right way to eventually pull it off.

Gaara and Sasuke might actually be able to share an Alpha, but it would be a more casual relationship where Sasuke is sort of in and out as need be, away for long periods of time

Gaara and Naruto could be able to share an Alpha but it would be a political nightmare

Finally, this is truly a rare pair I'm sure, but I could actually see Haku and Gaara getting along really well, well enough to share an Alpha. Also you get fun little ocean/desert motifs to play with

[spurgie-cousin]

Hi spurgie. I don't know if you remember me, but I was the anon from 2 years ago who had their first kiss at 25 and subsequently started dating him after. Well, last night he broke up with me, and I just don't know what to do. I feel like it came out of nowhere, but he feels he drifted too far apart from me. This was my first relationship, and it might sound naive but I truly thought it was forever. I know I shouldn't but I feel stupid to think someone could love me for the rest of my life. I still love him so much. What's worse is he was so kind and gentle about it. I wish he wasn't such a great person. I wish I could hate him but I don't. We still wanna be friends, and we share the same friend group, but it's gonna be really hard. I don't want him out of my life but I'm really hurting right now. I know I shouldn't hold onto hope that we might get back together in the future, but right now I can't see myself with anyone else (again, naive, I know). Sorry for the ramble, I just don't know who to turn to, and you've always been so kind.

Aw well first, I'm so sorry ❤️ breakups are always hard but the first one always hurts especially bad. I can't emphasize enough how normal those feelings you've described are though, they're not naive at all. Thinking about past breakups I've been through or sat with others through, it's big grief for a while, combined with that hopeless "I don't ever want to be with anyone else/no one else will ever be as good as them" feeling, combined with fighting the adjustment to someone's role in your life changing, and it can be a rough ride ngl. I know that sounds daunting, but it did help me a little in the moment to know many, many other people have felt exactly how I felt at the time bc when you're in the thick of it, it can feel very lonely and isolating, so I mention it just in case it's also helpful for you to know that.

My best advice for the first couple of days is just to ride it out and feel whatever it is your feeling at the moment, because it is kind of a grieving process and like grieving you need to get the big feelings out to be able to process it. Keeping your mind busy is also really helpful, it's ok to wallow for a while but if you get the chance to do something pleasant, or even just sit with someone instead of being alone, I found that super helpful. My last big breakup I spent a full 2 weeks at my parents house and in my free time I just sat with them (and cried on them lol a LOT) watched movies, played board games, etc. Even just having a conversation on the phone when the feelings start bubbling up again can be very cathartic.

Right now it might feel like you will never feel better, or never find anyone again (or want to), but that's just part of the grief and as impossible as it might sound, that starts to fade faster than you think it will. I know you mentioned you want to stay friends and I don't think that's impossible but it's probably a good idea to avoid seeing them just for the time being, because that can be like picking at a scab on a healing wound y'know? It can be confusing and stressful and hinder the healing process, at least in my experience. Same for communicating.

But yea I promise it gets better ❤️ this relationship not working out does not mean you are impossible to love forever at all, it just means that this wasn't the right person to do it, most of us just need to do some trial and error before we find that person. And tbh I think people who have been through trial and error can ultimately end up in healthier relationships, because experience makes you learn more about yourself/what you are looking for in a person. Be kind to yourself for now ❤️ this too shall pass, it will be ok.

[rosekasa]

I feel really sad that my art doesn't turn out good, nor does it get appreciated by fandoms. How did you deal with that in the beginning?

aww hi anon 💖im sending u big hugs. im sorry and ily

honestly i did not deal with this Well at the beginning. i started posting art for fandoms when i was 13 and it was not a great time to be both obsessing over reception from fandoms when i was also growing as an artist. it's very isolating to feel like no one really cares about what you create. or, what felt worse, being in groups of fandom friends where i would see other people whose works mattered but felt like mine didn't. and as a teenager that sucked even more! the first time i started really feeling good about my art and sharing it with fandoms was when i was 15, when i started drawing for miraculous.

i remember what shocked me about drawing for the ml fandom was that, for the first time in two years, i wasn't caring about being 'known' in a fandom. i realised how much it had stressed me out in previous fandoms so drawing for ml kind of felt like a rebellion against my own anxiety. i purposely separated my ao3 and my tumblr for months because i just didn't want people to see me as an actual Individual in the fandom (because i was scared i would start caring too much about the same stuff i cared about before). the fact that i felt like nobody cared about me other than my friends made me feel like i could create whatever i wanted. i would write fics with tropes specifically because they made me excited, would draw completely aimless stuff that had no purpose but making me happy, i would not care if something looked bad because "hey no one knows me in this fandom so what's the big deal??" but then like. it was THEN that i noticed i started getting more traction. when i started focusing on enjoying my work. when i wanted to become my own favourite artist.

basically, i guess what i'm trying to say is that it's really hard to deal with feelings of insecurity around your art. and although it seems very counterintuitive (and i still don't always manage to follow the principle) when you can say for sure that you yourself are your favourite creator, somehow other people can see that, and you'll become their favourite creator too. it sounds so silly but i've always had a tumultuous relationship with creating and social media but, in my seven years of having my art account, it has always helped me

[antiendovents]

Tw// death mention, mourning, grief

Today is the anniversary day of one of our friend's death. The last one was at the end of April. We hate May especially for being a very bad time.

Our trauma responses surrounding the events have lessened a lot, but it doesn't make the pain end. We are still very much set off and triggered by the event. We just noticed the date when on discord and it puts the new date above a message and it made us sick. We can't even handle seeing 5:19 on clocks cause of how much this day triggers us.

Things have gotten a lot better and we've made a lot of peace with it. But it was still very traumatic to us especially the circumstances around the death which we don't share because they are extremely triggering and traumatic. Not even many of our irl friends know how this day is for us since we shut down after it happened and never truly told them much.

Just needed to vent because today is really hard for us. She was a wonderful friend and very creative too. She absolutely adored dogs and stuffed animals. We made a memorial for her and her sister on our Animal Crossing New Horizons island. Wanted to share some things we loved about her. She was a lot of fun and truly deserved so much better.

Any kind words are appreciated, even if you're not very good with them. We're terrible when it comes to offering kind words ourselves especially being low empathy and shutting down when needing to be helpful in an emotional context so we completely understand in that case. We just mostly had to share it because we are...quite isolated in our grief since we aren't very open except with one close friend and it often worsens us a lot cause of that. Thanks for letting us vent really.

oh, I'm so sorry anon. Your friend sounds like an amazing person and it's really sad that she's gone. We hope you're handling things well,, please take care of yourself anon. Be easy on yourself, make sure to get plenty of rest, have some snacks if you think it could help. Even though we don't know you personally we want you to know that we care about you and that you're always welcome here. I'm sorry there isn't much I can really say to make this better, but I do hope that you'll be able be okay.

[intersex-support]

hi, um...

firstly, i'm really sorry if this post will makes any intersex person uncomfortable. you can just don't publish it, if you see this question is unacceptable.

and also, tw: dysphoria

i don't know if i am intersex, but let's pretend i am not, just because i don't feel i have a right to call myself this way. especially before any tests.

i called myself non-binary or androgynous, in the childhood, for some reason, i used a word he*****dite.

i have physical and social dysphoria from a both sides, too masc or too fem = day ruined. voice, body, hair, face... all of it. i know intersex ≠ androgyny, i know intersex it is a many variations. i don't think intersex people can't look masculine or feminine (or any other way they want to).

and... let's say... i had really hard times with dysphoria. and now i have it, too. i... i think it sounds ridiculous, but i feel my experience... i think i need to call myself intersex.

well. i said it.

honestly, i'm not sexualizing intersex people or think they look in one certain way. i just feel like i had to be intersex, born as one. i... i really can't explain what it means. i just know it.

i don't think being intersex if fun or *special*. i just want to live normal life with myself. i, honestly, i never will say i have experience as intersex people have. i know, i do not.

it's just really hurt to think i was born F/M, not I. i had to be intersex. maybe it sounds crazy or disrespectful. to me, born as F or M almost similar painful.

i know i will never be able to be myself. it's all was wrong from the very beginning. i don't use any labels such as "intersex" or "transintersex" or whatever. i don't think i have i right to be in intersex spaces as a member, not ally.

my questions are...

do you think my identity have a right to be or it's disrespectful for intersex people? do you believe it exists? will i hurt actually intersex people if i start to call myself intersex?

i'm really sorry. it was almost 10 years of my physical dysphoria and 20 years of social. i thought about this so many times, and i don't know how to stop feel this way.

anon, I will be honest that this question does make me uncomfortable, but I'm going to answer it anyway, because we get a lot of questions like this and yours is one of the less offensively phrased, so I want to take the time to answer this now.

If you are not intersex, you cannot identify as intersex. intersex people are not being mean or cruel when we say this, this is just a fact. And because we are so used to our bodies being fetishized, and people only paying attention to intersex experiences when it is convenient for them, we often are justifiably upset when we are continually asked questions by endosex/dyadic people who want to lay claim to intersex experiences without being intersex. so many people do not understand the extent of intersex oppression, the multifacted ways that stigma can shape our lives, and the amount of violence that many of us face whether it's medical violence, sexual violence, or otherwise. and so many of our experiences are shaped by our other identities--our transness, our race, our disabilities--so many ways that our lives as intersex people can become entangled with the oppression we face. that's not to say that being intersex is inherently a negative or traumatizing experience, but rather to express that the intersex community is so fragmented and isolated that oftentimes, we spend years without ever meeting any other intersex people and internalize our own experiences as our fault rather than understanding the underlying oppressive forces at work. I have so much intersex pride and love being intersex, but that is something that took years for me to be able to say.

being intersex is so much more than just our physical bodies, our diagnoses, or our experiences with dysphoria. i know you said that you understand that being intersex does not equal androgyny, but I'm not sure you actually have accepted what that means when you talk about it at the same time as you talk about your dysphoria around being perceived as masc or fem. I really think you have a lot of misconceptions about what it is like to live as intersex and your questions reflect those misunderstandings. I think statements like "just really hurt to think i was born F/M, not I" are statements that are really hard for intersex people, especially intersex people who experienced IGM at birth, to look at because it reflects such a distance from the ramifications of actually getting marked as "I" at birth.

I believe that your dysphoria is valid and that your distress is real-I'm not intending to invalidate that, and I think that you deserve support and compassion for those experiences. but i do not think intersex community is the space to seek that support, and i do not think calling yourself intersex is something that is an appropriate way to cope with that distress. I do think that it hurts intersex community when endosex people label themselves as intersex because it actively makes it harder for us to build community when we are already so isolated.

I do not have any intention of shaming you for having the dysphoria and experiences you do, but I think you do need to do some more self reflection about the way you engage with intersex community, and develop some clearer boundaries about how you act as an ally without centering yourself. If you want to seek support for these experiences, you need to figure out a way to do it that isn't harmful to the intersex people you interact with, or seek support elsewhere. I do genuinely hope that this dysphoria and distress becomes easier to deal with for you.

also, i think it really isn't appropriate to share that you used to identify as a hermaphrodite as a child. I understand you were a kid and didn't know better, but like, I really hope you understand that hermaphrodite is a slur that is very, very painful for many intersex people to see and we really don't have a lot of interest in hearing any justifications for endosex people using the slur in any context.

overall I can't really stop you from doing anything, I am not the authority on intersex community, and I am only one intersex person and am happy for other intersex people to add on/disagree in the comments. But I am not interested in giving you permission to identify as intersex when you know that you are not intersex.

[aspecpplarebeautiful]

tw sex mentions

this is probably gonna sound weird but being a sex and romance positive aroacespec person makes me feel really excluded from the community sometimes.

I understand that I seem to fall into a much smaller group of people- most aroace people I've met are repulsed or neutral on sex and romance. but it makes me feel almost... invalid, I guess? especially because it's a result of how my identities work (demiromantic and demisexual.) and some part of me often feels that people like me don't really have a place in the community, and id we do find one there's always gotta be someone who treats us poorly. I actually remember once having some people get mad at me for having the "audacity to call myself aroacespec when I can still feel romantic/sexual attraction in certain circumstances." got told I was invading a space, wasn't welcome.

and idk it's just... weird falling on the other side of things. I understand I could hypothetically just talk to non-aroace people about my attractions and experiences but they don't understand without lots of explanation, or they think I'm making things up (as they so often do with aroacespec identities...) but I receive the same treatment from my own community; accusations of enforcing allo and amatonormativity, faking being aroacespec for attention, etc. I'm kinda just in a weird limbo where I just... can't talk about my experiences.

it makes an already isolating experience feel far more isolating and I really wish I knew how to even go about finding other sex/romance positive aroacespec people so I didn't have to be so alone.

I'm sorry you've been having such a hard time, Anon. It sounds like not only are you dealing with lack of visibility but you've been running into gatekeeping too, which can be really difficult to deal with.

I do think part of the problem is the way social media is set up these days, certain narratives tend to the rise to the top and get the most visibility. Gray ace experiences are important too.

The other issue with modern social media is there's no moderation, which means there's no way to curb gatekeeping. Whereas in a properly run and moderated space, you can ban people for going around trying to tell people they're not what they identify as.

(Also just for the record, there are lots of ace and aro spectrum labels that include experiencing attraction in certain circumstances, and there's always been people who experience sexual and romantic attraction in this community. You belong here, Anon, and exactly as you say in your ask, allosexual and alloromantic experiences are not your experiences. There's a reason you came to these labels and your experiences and identity are valid. If you identify as aroacespec, that's what you are and no one else has the right to say otherwise. End of discussion.)

I'm really sorry you've been made to feel you can't talk about your experiences, gray experiences are so important to talk about and share. We have such a diverse community and ace and aro spectrum identities can be so complex, it's always helpful and beneficial to hear different people's experiences.

One thing you could do that may help is look into the gray-ace/gray-aro and demisexual/demiromantic tags specifically, which are somewhat active, and try and find people there to follow. Seek out similar experiences. I also recommend blocking any gatekeepers. They're always going to use the most emotionally charged language they can. It doesn't make them right. And hopefully one day we can just build better spaces for ourselves that give us more room to talk about our different experiences and find others like us.

All the best!