#i've been thinking all day how to reply ngl cause

[xofemeraldstars]

Confession: I think that Tommy and Buck have more chemistry than Eddie and Buck and I wish Kinley was endgame 😭 I want Tommy to become part of the main cast so badly

heyyy!! well bestie i'm on you on the bucktommy/kinley endgame train!! (if it wasn't obvious from my posts lol) it's the potential of it all ya know? and the way tommy is connected to the 118 and he's a first responder as well, i can truly see them developing a beautiful relationship 😊 also excited to maybe getting more air support involvement🚁👀

but yeah i've been rewatching eps here and these since s7 started and then started a chronological rewatch from s2 (don't look at me i didn't have s1 downloaded yet lol) after 7x4 and yeah without the shipper goggles... they're best friends <3<3

[mistydeyes]

a surprise house guest

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summary: The last thing Gaz expected to see in your shared flat was a baby in your arms and a mess in the kitchen, what have you gotten yourself into?

pairing: Kyle "Gaz" Garrick x fem!roommate!reader

warnings: swearing

a/n: hehe gaz roommate babysitting fluff! sidenote i've been babysitting and ngl kids are lil cuties like ahh

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Gaz's relaxed and warm morning in his mountain of blankets was soon interrupted by the loud clanging around in your shared kitchen. He groaned as he tousled his messy hair and tried to look for his phone. "Jesus, 7 am, really Y/N?" he muttered as the bright screen of his phone lit up the room. He wondered what trouble you had gotten into while he was away.

You had been his roommate for about a year now but it felt even shorter due to him consistently being called away on duty and your busy work schedule. You were friendly, sure, and on occasion a bit flirtatious but at the end of the day, you were just another facet of his life. You were just someone to collect the mail, take care of the dust, and occasionally make sure his room wasn't crawling with bugs. You had somehow managed to accomplish such while doing it so attractively. Wait what was he saying, you were his roommate after all. Just a young professional needing a place and not caring about his infrequent stays. But on the other hand, you were his age and he always had suspected you might fancy him when you joked about sharing a one-bedroom apartment for "the benefits." His thoughts were interrupted by a loud "FUCK" and crashing emanating from the hallway. He hurriedly ripped off the sheets and ran down the hall to assess what was going on.

The last thing he expected was to see you, baby bottle in hand, and a baby on your hip. "Jesus!" you jumped as he emerged into the kitchen, "when the hell did you get home?" He relaxed, seeing that the kitchen wasn't on fire and you weren't fighting some early morning burglar. "Last night," he replied before returning to looking at the baby. He looked at it as if it was an alien, "was I really gone that long?" he asked almost afraid to hear the response. It took you a minute to process his question but you quickly covered your mouth to stifle a laugh. "Oh my god, no, no, he isn't mine," you said through laughs that made your sides hurt. "my kid sister dropped him off this morning. I agreed to help out and look after him for the day." With that, the baby cooed and tried to reach to hold your hand as you relented and looked back at Gaz. "I would have definitely cleared this with you, but I didn't expect you back so early," you sighed as you tried to calm the small bundle trying to put your fingers in his mouth. You took a brief look around the kitchen and noticed how much of a mess you had caused trying to prepare some milk, "I promise I'll clean up once I've set him down."

"No worries," he replied as he made his way into the kitchen to make some coffee, "I was gonna say you look a little too good to have just given birth." You felt your face flush and before you could reply or even give him an introduction to your nephew, the bottle of formula was knocked out of your hands. "Oh for the love of God," you swore as you realized your tank top and pajama shorts were now stained with milk. Gaz couldn't help but laugh as he looked at you in such a state, it was clear you hadn't had time to get ready for the day as he took a good look at you. "Not funny, little man," you chided the baby before you looked at Gaz with a smirk. Before he could protest, you guided the baby into his arms and ran to your bedroom to get changed.

"Bloody hell, Y/N," he yelled after you, "what am I supposed to do?" "It's a baby, Kyle, I think you can handle it," you said through your partially opened door. He heard a few more clangs as you struggled to find something not soaked in milk. He looked back down to the bundle in his arms, "What's your name, little one?" He heard you laugh as you continued to rummage around. "Kyle for fucksake he's an infant, he can't talk," you shouted, "his name is Ben if you were wondering." Ben cooed at the sound of your voice and squirmed in Gaz's arms. "It's okay buddy, she'll be back in a moment," he tried to reassure him as he rocked his arms back and forth. The baby grew more impatient and began to let out a song of high-pitched cries. You emerged from the room, now in a different pair of shorts and a shirt. Without a second look, you rushed into the kitchen and began to clean up. "Take him to the living room," you said, exasperated, as Ben continued to wail. "You owe me one," Gaz called out and you could hear him trying to appease the now crying baby. You shook your head before going about tackling the mess in the kitchen. Once you finally finished and dried your hands on the hand towel, it was quiet except for some babbles from Ben.

"What do we have here?" you said as you walked up to the pair settled on the couch. Both turned to you, smiling like a pair of twins. You had to say Gaz looked rather handsome as the light streamed in from the window in your flat. An unshaven 5 o'clock shadow complimented his face nicely. "I got it handled," he said cockily as you sat on the couch next to him. "Sure you do," you replied and mocked his tone, your legs brushing against his as sat. You soon realized that the reason Ben had stopped crying was that he was now occupied by a small sealed bag of crisps. He was shaking it around proudly and slobbering all over the plastic. You turned your head to look at Gaz with a deadpan expression. "What?" he said defensively, "he likes it!" You let out a laugh as you crumbled back onto the couch and watched as Gaz held the baby on his lap. You couldn't deny, that once he got Ben to stop crying, he was a natural at this. You secretly envied the future, Mrs. Garrick. However, with Gaz's protective arm around the baby and you smiling right next to him, you looked like the perfect couple with a newborn. The moment quickly passed as you looked down at your hand. "Oh I have his bottle," you said and motioned for Gaz to pass you the baby. "Come here, love," you cooed and slowly rocked him in your arms. You set your feet on top of Gaz's lap and sang a soft little lullaby to calm the infant.

After watching the baby drink the formula at record speed, he was finally asleep in your arms. "Finally," you groaned as you watched his little eyelids flutter. You leaned back in the crook of the couch, making sure he was fast asleep before you looked back at Gaz. He had a sense of wonder and awe in his eyes as he looked up at you. You slowly moved Ben into the small lounger cushion your sister had brought and stretched out of exhaustion. "Thanks again," you whispered as you motioned for Gaz to follow you back to the kitchen, "I really appreciate it." He nodded in response and leaned against the counter, closing his eyes in a moment of peace. You stood next to him and placed your head against his arm. You could feel him slightly react to your action but soon relax as he looked down at you. To both of you, it felt oddly comfortable to be like this. "Welcome home, by the way," you said, finally acknowledging his return "Sorry about this whole mess." He smiled as you met eyes and then let out a low chuckle. "It's alright, I got caught up in watching you play Mummy today," he joked, slightly tussling your hair with his free hand. You blushed briefly at the compliment but you soon found yourself wrestling his arm to stop. You ended up placing it securely around your shoulders and held it in place to prevent any further assault.

"I'm serious," Gaz defended as he relaxed his confined arm, "you look like a natural with him. You looked up at him and decided to test the waters, just a tiny bit. "Oh really now?" you challenged, "something about this situation gives you baby fever?" Now Gaz was the one with a subtle blush on his cheeks as you smirked at his reaction. "Let's go on a date then, love, and find out," he blurted, seemingly without any hesitation. You tensed a bit as you processed what he was saying. "You asking me out now, Garrick?" you questioned, turning your body to look at him. "Maybe I am," he whispered, moving a piece of hair out of your face and moving his hand to cup your face. As time moved slowly, you stood on your tippy toes and moved closer to his lips. Just as the space was about to close, a shrieking cry filled the apartment. "I think he wants Daddy," you teased as you tried to hide your disappointment, "we'll talk about this after dinner?" As Kyle huffed away, you couldn't help but secretly thank your sister for the emergency nanny service.

[d3adp00ls]

Omg what if Vanessa x reader where they are married and they have a nice slow day where they are on ther periods or something and are super clingy and touchy and make cake or something

Heart To Heart

Vanessa (fnaf movie) x reader

Summary: See request

Contents: Pure fluff like seriously I’m single and writing this shit made me feel lonely, periods, so that means talk of blood, Vanessa is literally me in the beginning, food fights, attempt at baking, tickle fight, kisses, i want someone like this.

Word count: Go to McDonalds and ask for a double quarter pounder with fries and chicken nuggets with bbq sauce, the cashier should then tell you what the word count is.

side note: I got carried away ngl and now it’s less of a period fic than it is just a goofy fluff fic and I’m sorry about that anon 😅if you don’t like this one feel free to request another period fic and I can definitely try again. ALSO, I WAS LISTENING TO HEART TO HEART BY MAC DEMARCO ON REPEAT WHILE WRITING THIS, AND ISTG THAT SONG MAKES ME FEEL THINGS!!

Side note #2: I hate cake…I STILL WROTE ABOUT CAKE THO CUZ I KNOW HOW TO MAKE IT (kudos to my older sister for teaching me when I was younger)…but I hate it it tastes like dirt with frosting on it I never liked it. ALSO AS YOU CAN SEE HOW USED MY BIG BRAIN AND REALIZED I COULD NAME THE STORY AFTER THE SONG I PLAYED ON REPEAT LIKE A GENIUS.

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The warm sunlight poured in through the windows, casting a gentle glow over you and Vanessa as you snuggled in your shared bed. Your bodies were entwined beneath the soft covers, and as the light stirred you awake, you nuzzled your face into Vanessa's chest. She responded by pulling you closer and resting her head on top of yours. Just as you were about to drift back to sleep, a loud noise jolted you both awake. With puzzled expressions, you sat up and looked at the bedside table where the noise was coming from.

"Did you forget to turn off your alarm?" you asked, watching as Vanessa reached over to turn it off.

"I must have," she groaned, hitting the alarm button to silence it.

You got out of bed, ready to start your day. Vanessa watched as you gathered a towel, one of her oversized shirts, and some comfortable clothing before she spoke up.

"Where are you going?" she asked, still sounding sleepy.

"I'm going to freshen up, I feel like I've bled all over the sheets," you replied, your voice slightly hoarse from just waking up.

Vanessa hummed in response, rearranging the sheets you had been lying on. She looked up at you with a concerned expression.

"There's no blood, my love," she reassured you, causing you to smile at her thoughtfulness.

"Still, I think it would be best if I shower now," you said with a hint of amusement. Vanessa moved to sit on your side of the bed and reached out for you to come closer.

"Please, can you stay in bed a little longer? If you happen to bleed, I'll clean it up," she pleaded, her voice still muffled from burying her face in your stomach.

"I don't want to get up right now," she whined, and you couldn't help but giggle at her adorable pout.

"It's already 12 pm, love. We've already missed half the day," you reminded her, causing her to groan.

"So what? We've worked hard all week, we deserve these few days off," she argued, crossing her arms and looking at you with a defeated expression.

"That's true," you agreed with a soft smile. You took a step back, causing her to let go of you, and she pouted even more.

"But you know what else is fun to do when we're both on our monthly cycle?" you asked, a mischievous glint in your eye.

"What?" Vanessa grunted, her arms still crossed.

"Taking a shower and baking a cake with the person you love most," you said, watching as her eyes widened in surprise.

"But if you'd rather stay in bed all day, that's fine too," you added with a shrug, before turning and walking towards the bathroom. You could hear Vanessa rustling around in the bedroom before she ran after you with a cheeky smile.

"I thought you wanted to sleep in," you teased, looking at her playfully as you took off your shirt.

"I wanted to sleep in with you. Plus, I don't want to leave you alone while you shower," she said, giving you a kiss on the cheek before undressing alongside you.

"Oh totally," you replied with a laugh, turning on the water in the shower.

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"Okay, so now we need four room-temperature eggs that have been separated," Vanessa calls out to you as you grab the eggs from the counter and a bowl.

"Wait, separated? Do you mean in different bowls?" you ask, looking at the eggs and the one bowl you had taken out.

Vanessa laughs and you look up at her, confused. She shakes her head with a smile and puts down the baking book she was reading from before moving to stand behind you.

"No, my love, separatied means separating the yolk from the egg whites. Can you hand me an egg?" she playfully whispers in your ear.

You hand her an egg and she stands next to you, cracking it against the counter and separating the yolk from the egg white by passing it between the two shells until only the yolk remains.

"See? It's not that difficult," she says with a smile, breaking you from your trance. You return the smile and say, "Yeah, I've got this."

As you continue to separate the eggs and put them in the bowl, Vanessa moves around the kitchen, preparing the other ingredients.

"Done!" you exclaim, looking at Vanessa. She curses under her breath and you drop the empty egg shells in shock. Vanessa had accidentally dropped the flour on her head while reaching for it on the top shelf. You cover your mouth to stifle the laugh that wants to escape as you watch her.

"Baby, I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to scare you. I was just excited to do this right and-" Before you can finish apologizing, Vanessa throws the rest of the flour on you, causing you to gasp in surprise. You stand in shock as she laughs.

"Nessa! What the hell?" you exclaim, surprised. Vanessa continues to laugh as you grab one of the egg yolks from the counter and smear it on her face. She stops laughing as you rub the yolk on her face, then wipes it away to look at you with a playful glare.

"Now you're in trouble," she says, grabbing the rest of the yolks and smushing them on your face. You groan and wipe the yolk off, spitting out any that got into your mouth.

Vanessa continues to laugh as you complain about the yolk in your mouth. She runs to get towels and two glasses of water before returning and handing you a towel. You wipe your face and apologize for laughing, then pick up one of the glasses of water and pour it on Vanessa's head, causing her to gasp and close her eyes.

"Y/n!" she shouts, and you laugh as you run away. Vanessa wipes her face with her sleeve before chasing after you and tackling you onto the couch.

"Hey, stop! You're going to get the couch wet and dirty," you say, laughing as she tickles you. Vanessa finally stops and walks away for a moment, giving you time to catch your breath. But before you can, she comes back with the other glass of water. You try to protest, but she throws the water on you before you can finish. You groan as she giggles and says, "Now we're even."

"Let's go finish this cake," Vanessa says, laughing as she walks back to the kitchen. You call out that you'll get her back and fall back onto the now-wet couch, not caring if it gets any dirtier.

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You lay snuggled up against Vanessa on the couch as an old romance show played on the television. She had her arms wrapped around you as you picked at the remnants of cake on your plate, gazing absentmindedly at the TV. Vanessa's lips snapped you out of your daydream as she planted a soft kiss on your head, causing you to smile and look up at her.

"Hi," you say with a smile, and she smiles back before nodding towards the plate in your hand.

"Are you going to finish that?" she asks, and you look down at the plate before shaking your head and playing with the plastic fork.

"Nah, do you want the last bite?" you offer, looking back up at her. She nods eagerly, and you hand her the plate.

"Can you feed it to me, though?" she asks with a mischievous glint in her eye. You raise an eyebrow, wondering what she's up to, but ultimately nod and move to straddle her. As you hand her the fork, she grabs your leg and pulls it over her waist, holding onto your waist as you lean down to feed her the last bite of cake.

"This is extra, you could have just taken the plate from me," you comment, slightly annoyed but unable to hide your smile.

"I know, but you look cute when you're flustered," Vanessa teases, smirking up at you. You playfully roll your eyes before planting a quick kiss on her lips.

"Let's go shower now," you say, trying to get up, but Vanessa's grip on your waist tightens.

"One more kiss," she pleads, and you sigh, knowing she won't let you go until you comply. You give her a tight-lipped smile before leaning down to give her another quick kiss, but she surprises you by deepening the kiss, her tongue exploring your mouth. You moan against her lips as you taste the cake on her tongue.

As the kiss intensifies, you feel Vanessa's hand move from the back of your head to rest on your cheek, and she breaks the kiss, her thumb lightly tracing your bottom lip. You catch your breath, looking down at her with a dazed expression.

"Do you still want to shower?" she asks with a playful glint in her eye, and you shyly nod, hiding your face in the crook of her neck.

"But we should take one together to save water," you suggest, your voice muffled against her skin. Vanessa hums in agreement, her voice teasing as she replies, "Sure, just because you want to save water."

You can't help but smile against her neck as you lift your head to look at her with a mock serious expression.

"Vanessa, that's gross. We both have our periods," you say, feigning disgust at what she was suggesting. But Vanessa just shrugs, not fazed by your comment.

"So what?" she replies with a smirk, and you can't help but laugh at her nonchalant response.

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Tbh idk if this is short or long but I can tell you it sucks ass but I’m so fucking tired with school and shit I got lazy at the ending and I’m so sorry abt that 😭 I promise future fics won’t be this ass.

[bookworm551]

Take the Edge Off | Part 8 | Pillow Talk

You finally get a quiet moment of quality time with Miguel.

A/N: wooooooow It’s been a hot minute. I feel like I’m coming back to my neopets after abandoning them for years. Tbh I just needed to take a break, I’ve been working and going to school, so it’s been a lot. Anyways, I’ve come back to feed you before disappearing again for an unknown amount of time. Also, this is pretty self indulgent ngl, so this is for the praise kink girlies. Enjoy <3

Warnings: smut, overstimulation, the usual

Word count: 6.8k

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6 Part 7 Part 9 Part 10

You woke up slowly the next morning. The soft light that flooded into the room caused you to stir lazily from your dreamless sleep. You stretched with a deep yawn, feeling a dull a soreness in your arms and shoulders that reminded you of all the things you had done with Miguel the night before.

You shifted under the covers and blinked your bleary eyes open. As your vision adjusted, you registered the figure of Miguel asleep next to you. He was positioned on his stomach with his face half-way buried in his pillow, and his back moved up and down slowly with his deep, even breaths. He had his arms tucked under his pillow, and there were some loose strands of hair that had fallen over his face. It took every ounce of your strength to not brush it aside for fear that you would wake him and break this quiet moment together.

You watched him for a second with a soft smile. Laying on your side, you admired his resting face. This was the first time you had ever woken up with him still there next to you. Every other time he had either left immediately or after you had fallen asleep. It was a nice change, and as you lay there quietly, you couldn't help but wish you woke up like this every day.

"I can feel you staring," Miguel grumbled quietly, startling you out of your reverie. You smiled sheepishly as he blinked his eyes open to look at you. They were still bleary with sleepiness, and his soft gaze warmed your chest.

"I didn't realize you were up," you stated, your own voice hoarse from sleep. He let out a little huff before closing his eyes again, not saying anything in return. "How long have you been awake?" You asked quietly. He sighed, not opening his eyes. "I woke up with your tossing and turning about 20 minutes ago," he replied finally.

You hummed and offered softly, "Sorry." You had gained a reputation in your life as a restless sleeper, and apparently, it didn’t matter how much he had worn you out the night before. "It's fine," Miguel grunted as he shifted and rolled onto his back. "I should've been up earlier than that."

You smiled. You were glad he had chosen to stay here, to let you see him like this. Knowing he was a busy man, it meant a lot to you. "Full schedule today?" you asked.

Miguel sighed, running a hand down his face. "The briefing for our mission is at noon," he said. "After that, I've got a stack of reports I need to review." That sounded boring to you, but you couldn't help but grin at his words: our mission. You had almost forgotten that he added you to the team, and the notion of working with Miguel again excited you.

"Who else is on the team?" You asked casually, fighting a lazy yawn as you stretched out next to him.

"I don't think you know all of them," he stated. You hummed and replied, "Well, who would I know?" He paused a second to consider. "Me, a handful of Peters," he began. "Malala, Jess, and she's been asking to bring Gwen, too."

You rolled over onto your side, resting your head on your hand with a smirk. "Me," you added smugly. Miguel rolled his eyes. "You," he conceded. "And I think that's it."

You gave a short, thoughtful hum. There was one name you noticed was missing from the list, someone you thought deserved to be on the team as well. You knew trying to change the roster would upset Miguel, but you couldn't ignore the gut feeling you had telling you that there was one more person who should be added to the mission.

Miguel seemed to notice that you were thinking about something. "What?" He questioned, an eyebrow raised suspiciously. You looked up at him and smiled reluctantly. "You're not gonna like it," you told him. His dark eyes narrowed. "What?" He repeated, sounding even more suspicious than before.

"Promise you won't be mad?" You asked. "No," he responded evenly. "You probably piss me off more than anyone here."

You chuckled at that. "That's probably true," you admitted, moving closer to him as you did. He had a few faint scars that were littered across his shoulders and chest, and you began absently tracing your fingers over them.

After a quiet second, he prompted gently, "What is it?"

You didn't reply for a moment as your fingers danced over the faint lines on his skin. Finally, you looked back up at his face and found he was gazing down at you expectantly. With a sigh, you finally said, "You need to add Ben to the team."

Miguel's face hardened immediately. "No," he replied sharply. You sighed again. "I already know what you're gonna say," you stated. Miguel huffed an irritated breath. "He's the reason we're in this mess. He's the reason this anomaly has been able to cause all that damage."

"That wasn't his fault," you defended gently. "It could have happened to anyone, and I know how badly he wants to make it right." Miguel scoffed, and he sat up from the bed. "Nothing he can do will bring back Earth-2319," he stated sharply. "All those lives are gone forever."

He turned his body to step out of bed, and you sat up with him, allowing the covers to slip off your bare torso. You had known he would to be upset by your suggestion, but you didn't want this to turn into an argument.

Reaching a hand out, you gently grabbed his shoulder to keep him from leaving. "And don't you think he knows that?" You pointed out softly. "Can't you imagine how terrible he feels?"

Miguel felt tense under your palm, and he didn't reply. You were afraid that he was going to shrug you off, and you wouldn't have blamed him. You could still remember his haunted gaze when he came to you after the loss of Earth-2319. This mission was personal for him, and you knew Miguel wasn't going to do anything he thought would jeopardize it.

After a silent second, he sighed heavily, and his stiff shoulders sagged under your hand. "I don't have to imagine," he muttered quietly.

A taut silence followed his words. The air around you suddenly felt fragile, and you were afraid of breathing for fear of breaking it. You didn't know what he was referring to, and you wanted desperately to ask, but it seemed almost disrespectful to do so. So instead, you waited.

Miguel seemed to sense your curiosity and breathed out another sigh. "When I first traveled across the multiverse," he began slowly, "I found something I wanted—badly. I thought it was harmless, so...I decided to take it for myself."

You closed your eyes regretfully, understanding that what he was implying broke the canon of that universe. You shifted your body closer to the edge of the bed so you could see his face. His eyes were downcast with the memory replaying in his head, a faraway look on his face.

"I didn't know what would happen until it was too late," he finished softly.

You let his words hang in the air for a moment before taking the hand that was still resting on his shoulder, raising it up to cup his cheek, and turning his face toward yours. His eyes were still fixed downward, but he allowed himself to be guided by your hand.

"You didn't know any better," you said finally. "You can't blame yourself for what you didn't know." He let out a small huff and turned his face away from you again, pulling away from your hand. "It was reckless and stupid," he muttered. "I was stupid."

"You weren't stu—"

"I destroyed a universe," he snapped, his eyes finally flashing up to your face. Grief and anger were etched in his face, and in his eyes, you saw the same pain the night after Earth-2319 was lost. You realized now how much worse it must have been for him that day, and your chest ached for him.

"I understand," you whispered softly. "And I’m sorry, I didn't know." He scoffed. "It's not exactly something I brag about," he stated darkly. "And it's not something I ever plan on repeating. I can't afford to be wrong. Being wrong costs lives."

You didn't say anything for a moment, and Miguel’s shoulders slumped in defeat. There was that quiet openness again, the subtle vulnerability that seemed to be showing more and more. He obviously meant what he said, and you understood that his words came from painful experience.

Your hand raised up to rest on his bare chest, and your thumb brushed his skin gently. "You can't put it all on yourself," you whispered to him. "Nobody is that strong." Miguel didn't reply for a second before whispering back, "I have to be."

You sighed quietly and shook your head. "No, you don't," you insisted. "That's why you have all of us. Jess, Peter, me, everyone—we're all here for you."

Miguel had been staring at the ground as you spoke, but his eyes moved up to meet yours at your last sentence. His gaze was piercing, almost overwhelming. It made you almost nervous to say what you were going to say, but you held his stare as you emphasized your next words: "I'm here for you."

Your statement hovered in the air, leaving the silence that followed to rest heavy around you. Your chest tightened anxiously as Miguel stared at you wordlessly. His eyes were impossible to read. Had you gone too far? You knew he didn't want a relationship. Were your words too close to a confession?

Finally, your worries were allayed when Miguel leaned in and pressed his lips to yours in a tender kiss. It was different than the passionate way he usually made out with you when you were fucking. This was slow, like he was taking his time just to appreciate how your lips felt against his. It almost felt like a token of gratitude.

"You make it easier," he whispered when he finally broke away from your mouth. Your chest swelled as you smiled softly at him. “Good,” you replied quietly. “That’s what I’m here for.” A small smile cracked the grave expression he wore, and you kissed him again.

When you pulled back again, he studied your face for a second. “You still want me to add Ben, don’t you?” He guessed.

You sighed softly and nodded. “Wouldn't you do anything to make it right?” You asked him quietly. His eyes were still fixed on your lips, but you could tell he was thinking about your words. Without replying, he simply nodded his head.

“So would Ben,” you continued. “Please let him come.”

He still didn’t say anything for a moment. He sat quietly for a few heartbeats before letting out a deep sigh. “I'll think about it,” he said finally. You smiled at him, knowing that even him contemplating your plea was victory enough. “Thank you,” you told him, closing the space between you with a kiss. He hummed against your lip before murmuring, “You know, I thought I said I don't want you to talk about Ben around me.”

You smiled mischievously. “Well, we're breaking my rule about not discussing work in bed,” you pointed out. A faint smirk appeared on his lips. “Well, maybe I don't care about your rules,” he stated with a hint of humor in his voice.

“Then why should I care about yours?” You shot back. Miguel shifted from off the edge of the bed to lean forward over you, forcing you to lay down slowly under him. “Because there are consequences to breaking my rules, remember?” He said in a low voice, his eyes darkening with desire.

Your heart began to race as he trapped your body under his. “No,” you replied coyly, “I think I forgot.” Raising a hand to his head, you pulled his face down just above yours. “You'll have to remind me,” you whispered to him before pulling him down into a hard kiss.

You brought your hand around his head to run your fingers through his hair as he deepened the kiss. After a second, he moved his lips down to your neck while one of his hands traveled up your stomach to palm your breast, earning a quiet moan from you. Even after all the things he had done to you last night, you were ready for more.

You pushed yourself up off the mattress, forcing Miguel to roll back over onto his back as you straddled his waist. The seriousness from his face had disappeared when you settled on top of him. A smug grin pulled at his lips as the covers slipped off of your body, and his eyes drank in the sight of your bare body before him.

"Not too tired after last night?" He asked in an amused tone. You leaned forward and planted your hands on either side of his head as you brought your face close to his. "Baby, I could go all day," you purred before pressing your lips to his and slipping your tongue between them.

Miguel's hands gripped at your thighs, and his breathing deepened as he shifted under you. You brought one hand up to run your fingers through his hair, and when you broke away from his mouth, you moved your lips down to kiss under his jaw. He tilted his head back with a soft sigh to allow you better access to the soft skin of his neck.

Before you could go any further, Miguel's watch began beeping, disturbing the growing anticipation you both felt. You groaned, and he sighed regretfully as he raised his arm up to read the message he had received. You lifted your head up slightly to look at his face. He was clearly irritated by the interruption, and his eyes flicked back and forth as he quickly read the message.

"It's Jess," he explained. "She's asking about the meeting later." You rolled your eyes. There was always somebody or something that demanded his attention, and you were sick of it. You didn't want to let him go this time.

"You know," you began slowly, "there's this cool feature on these gizmos." You grabbed his arm and raised it up so you could see the screen. Miguel watched in amusement as you pressed the screen until you found what you were looking for.

"There," you said proudly, pressing the 'silent' button in his watch's configuration. "Much better." His eyes moved from your face to the watch and then back to your face with a raised eyebrow. "Is that why you never respond to my messages?" He asked suspiciously. You gave him a sly smile. "I just like it better when you tell me in person," you defended innocently.

"Mhmm," he hummed in response, a subtle smirk pulling on his lips as you kissed them again. You were eager to pick up the momentum you had lost to Jess's message, and you quickly returned your mouth to his neck again.

"We can't," he murmured, the bass of his voice vibrating against your lips. "I need to get up."

You hummed softly before whispering against his skin, "No."

You heard him breathe out a chuckle, and his hands came up to pull your arms gently off his body. "I know," he replied, sitting up as he did. "But people are going to notice I'm missing."

A spike of determination shot up in you, the frustration at his constant leaving finally showing. With both hands, you shoved him back down against the mattress by his chest, using most of your weight to keep him down. "Let them notice," you told him. "You're not going anywhere."

Under your hands, Miguel's breathing deepened, and his eyes flashed with lust at your assertion. His desire for you was clearly painted on his face, but with a clenched jaw, he sighed regretfully. "I can't stay," he insisted. "There's too much to do."

Despite his words, his fingers were gripping at your thighs, and he shifted under you restlessly. His resolve was hanging by a thread, and you knew exactly how to snap it.

Your mouth curled in a wicked grin as you lowered your face to hover over his own. "You're gonna stay right here with me until I'm through with you," you whispered to him. "You know why?"

Miguel was obviously fighting to keep his breathing steady, and his eyes were fixed on your lips when he managed to ask, "Why?" You lowered your face just above his, your eyes locking and noses brushing against each other. Then, softly, smugly, you said, "Because this pussy is yours, and I know how much you love it."

Miguel's jaw clenched at your words, and when you pressed your lips to his again, he was no longer holding back. His tongue pushed its way into your mouth aggressively as his fingers dug into your hips. From beneath you, his body shifted as he propped himself more upright and pushed your hips down to where his hardened cock was waiting.

You smiled deviously as he kissed you. The feeling of power rushed to your head at being able to distract him from his work with only a few words. Your heart was pounding in anticipation, and with the soft breathy moans you were both making, the ache between your legs was growing almost painful.

You allowed yourself to be guided back by his hard, gripping hands. A thrill ran up through your body when you felt his cock brush against your hot entrance. You could see the unfocused look in Miguel's eyes, like the only thing he could think about was being inside you.

To be mischievous, you teased your pussy around his length. Miguel groaned ever so softly, and his eyes burned with lust. "I don't have time for your fucking teasing," he growled. You smirked, always enjoying getting him riled up. He was even better when he was frustrated.

"You're so impatient," you observed with an amused voice. "I'm gonna have to teach you how to wait nicely one day." Miguel wasn't so amused. "I don't have time for this," he replied, shifting under you to try and align himself to you. You laughed. "That's the point," you said. "You need to learn how to—"

You cut yourself off with a sharp gasp. Miguel clearly had enough of your lecture and finally slammed himself into you, causing you to fall forward so that your head rested against his. The sudden feeling of him stretching you out so unexpectedly had made your mind freeze, and for a second, you couldn't speak.

"You were saying?" Miguel muttered smugly when you opened your eyes again. You couldn't even remember what you were saying. The only thing on your mind now was how badly you needed to fuck him.

With Miguel's hands still on your hips, you began moving eagerly along the length of his cock. You rocked your hips against his, grinding your pussy hard against him. Quiet whines began to rise up from your throat as you raised yourself up and down, slowly at first, but you soon increased your pace as he began grunting from the feeling of you riding him.

Miguel was gripping your waist tightly and gasping quietly as he helped you move up and down his length. You fell forward, planting your hands on his chest as you moved your hips against his. His eyes met yours with an electrifying gaze that only encouraged your movements.

"Fuck," he muttered under his breath, his eyes fixed on your face with a lustful sort of reverence as his hands slowly slid up the sides of your torso. "You're so fucking pretty."

Damn him and his words that sent your heart fluttering. Even there, in the midst of riding him, you felt your face grow warm from his praise. Of course, you had heard him say things like that before, but for some reason, it hit you in a different way that turned you into a blushing mess on top of him.

Miguel apparently noticed the effect his praise had over you because his lips twisted in a half-smirk, and he sat up off the bed to bring his face up to yours. "My pretty girl," he murmured, his voice deep as he spoke the words against your lips.

You seemed to forget how to breathe. Your heart was pounding furiously in your chest as you locked eyes with him. His dark, piercing gaze that once seemed like an impenetrable wall was now soft and warm. The way he was staring at you made you feel like he could see into your soul, like he knew what you felt for him, what you wanted from him. And in his eyes, you could almost swear that you could see it, too.

His strong arms wrapped themselves slowly around your torso to hold you against him, and his lips pressed against yours gently. You didn't even realize that he was rolling you over until you were on your back beneath him, and he began driving his hips into yours.

You let out a soft moan and broke away from his lips. Miguel's head fell to your shoulder as he moved steadily inside you, his cock pumping in and out of your soaking cunt. His hot breath fanned against your collarbones, and you could hear how he grunted softly with each thrust.

"God, I can't get enough of you," he panted, his voice hoarse and quiet. "Fucking you is—it's like Rapture."

You nearly came apart right there. His words and his cock had you completely at his mercy. One of your hands gripped at his muscular back while the other slid up the back of his neck to run through his dark hair. It took most of your effort to even form a coherent thought, and speaking felt next to impossible.

"Only you—," you started, cutting yourself off with a moan. "Only you can m-make me feel like this. You fuck me so good."

Miguel groaned quietly at your words. Lifting his face up from your shoulder, he rested his forehead against yours. "You know why?" He asked quietly. You opened your eyes to meet his, not even bothering to respond. "Because you're my pretty girl," he asserted. "And this pussy is mine." As he spoke, Miguel's hand slipped down between your bodies until he found your clit with his thumb.

You cried out in ecstasy as he circled his thumb around while still driving his cock deep inside you. Your hand moved from his back to grip the headboard above you as he fucked you relentlessly. The sounds of his hips slapping against yours were in-time with each whining moan you made. You barely had time to register that you were cumming until it took over your whole body.

You were practically screaming his name as your body shook uncontrollably. You pulled him close to you while his hips continued thrusting into you ceaselessly. Bliss completely overtook your every faculty, and the only thing your mind could process was Miguel.

His eyes never left your face as he watched you completely unravel under him. He gave a long, deep moan at the feeling of you clenching around him. His lips brushed against yours as he slowed down his pace for you, aware of how your body was beginning to grow overstimulated, and he murmured your name under his breath softly.

As you finished riding out your high, your body was still alight with pleasure, and your heart was still beating wildly in your chest, but you finally managed to breathe properly again. Blinking your eyes open, Miguel's dark gaze was hypnotizing. He was clearly proud of how he had caused you to come so undone, and he whispered, "You're so pretty when you cum."

All you could do to respond was moan softly. He never failed to get you off, and he never failed to praise you when you did.

With one hand still entangled in his hair, you pulled his face down to yours in a sloppy kiss. As Miguel's tongue danced against yours, he pulled himself out of you. You were still breathing hard when he sat up off your body. Taking advantage of the fact that you were still recovering from your high, he turned you over so that you were on your stomach and lifted your ass up to him.

Even if you had wanted to resist him, your mind was still hazy from all the pleasure buzzing through your body. Following his prompts, you obediently propped yourself up on your knees, your back arched as you held onto the sheets.

"What a good girl you are," he murmured, running his hand down your back. You hummed softly at his touch and turned your head to look at him from the corner of your eye. "Only for you," you whispered. You heard him give a heavy sigh, and you felt the head of his cock teasing the entrance of your soaking cunt.

"That's right," he purred. "You're my good girl."

That was the last thing he said before slamming his cock back into you. You gasped sharply, startled by his sudden movements as he picked up an eager pace. Still sensitive from your orgasm, you whimpered softly against the sheets.

"It's too much," you whined, gripping the comforter to try and pull yourself forward to escape the sensations overpowering you. "You can take it, babygirl," he assured you gently, his cock moving faster and harder inside you. "I know you can."

You couldn't say anything in response. You were high on his words and drunk off his cock. Your eyes were clenched shut as he pounded into you. The sound of his hips slapping against your ass filled the air, and with each thrust into you, he hit against your G-spot over and over again. Your body felt weak, and you were completely at his mercy.

"Miguel," you moaned, unable to say anything else. He cursed softly under his breath, and his hands gripped your hips tightly to keep you steady. "You're doing so good, cariño," he told you, his fingers digging into your skin. "Just a little more."

His gentle tone contrasted sharply against the almost savage way he was fucking you. Your breathing came in shallow gasps, and your legs started to give out from under you. Miguel dropped one of his hands to support himself on the mattress. His large body seemed to envelope yours, and you could feel the heat from his skin warming your back. His panting breath tickled your ear as he continued ramming into you relentlessly.

You turned your face toward his, your noses brushing against each other. His lips were grazing the corner of your mouth in feather-light touches. Your eyes, blurred and unfocused, met his, and in that moment, a three-word phrase entered your mind that you had sworn to yourself you would never say to him.

"Miguel, I-I—"

You couldn't finish your sentence before your body was racked by another orgasm. You hadn't expected it, and it hit you hard and fast. A strangled cry emerged from your throat as your body trembled under his.

Miguel became desperate when he saw you were cumming again. With each thrust, he grunted loudly, overpowering the sound of your quiet gasping. Your whole body was shaking, and just when it was getting to be too much for you to handle, Miguel grew still with a ragged moan as he came inside you.

For a moment, there was just the sounds of your rapid breathing as you were both lost in the intoxicating feeling of finishing together. His head rested against yours, his skin hot to the touch. The sounds of his panting still tickled your ear while his hand slowly roamed from your waist up your back. Finally, with a gentle kiss to your shoulder, he pulled out of you.

Your hands released the vise grip they had on the sheets as you slumped down against the bed. Your mind was still flooded with the pleasure you felt, and you didn't have the capacity to do anything besides lay there and try to recover your breath.

Turning onto your back, you looked up at Miguel. His hair had fallen into his face in a messy way that made him even more handsome. Raising your free hand up to his face, you brushed his hair back so that you could see him clearly. His eyes seemed unfocused as his mind was clouded with pleasure. After a quiet second of staring at each other, he lowered his face to place a lazy kiss on your mouth.

God, how you wanted this to last. You wanted him to fuck you senseless every day. You wanted him to kiss you every hour, to think of you every minute, to be with you every second. Being together like this, open and vulnerable and comfortable with each other, it was the first time you felt a sense of connection with another person since you became Spider-Woman.

When he broke away from your lips, he slumped down beside you with a deep sigh. You glanced over at his face, a faint glimmer of sweat shining on his forehead, and admired for the millionth time just how good he looked.

As your breathing was finally evening out, you closed your eyes and felt like you could fall right back to sleep next to him again.

"Don't even think about it," Miguel mumbled, breaking the silence between you. "Hmm?" You questioned, opening your eyes to look at him.

"You're not falling asleep again," he said with a pointed look.

You groaned, rolling onto your side to face him better. "Why not?" You asked innocently. Miguel stretched his arms before answering, his muscles flexing in a way that made you crave another round with him. "Because I need to go," he sighed. "And that means you do, too."

You raised an eyebrow at him. "You can't just fuck me like that and expect me to be able to get up and leave after," you told him wryly.

Miguel huffed out a laugh, a cocky smile on his face. "I'm serious," you insisted, unable to suppress your own grin. The rare sight of Miguel's smile paired with the high you were still feeling made you giddy. "I'm sure you are," he replied, "but I'm also serious about needing to go."

You rolled your eyes. "Then go," you told him theatrically. "I won't beg for your company." Despite your words, you did indeed want to beg for his company. Every time he left, it was harder and harder for you to let him go.

He huffed again. "I'm not going to leave you alone in my room," he replied dryly.

You smirked at him. "Afraid I'm gonna steal your stuff?" You joked. Miguel's eyes turned to you with an amused gleam. "It's a possibility," he said evenly. "You still haven't given me my shirt back." You closed your eyes for a moment with a sigh. "Oh, yeah," you mumbled as you stretched out like a cat. "I definitely meant to do that."

Miguel hummed his disbelief, but there was humor in his subtle smile. "If I didn't know any better," he began slowly, reaching over to wrap his arm around you and pull you closer to him, "I would say you're lying."

Your own smile widened as you looked up at him mischievously, and you rolled over so that you rested on his chest. "Oh, you think you know better?" You asked in a sly tone, hovering your face over his.

His mouth was pulled in a crooked grin as his fingers brushed lazily across your bare back. "I know I do," he replied with a deep voice, his eyes fixed on your lips.

You hummed thoughtfully. "Well, maybe you're wrong," you asserted.

"I'm never wrong."

"I don't believe that."

"Name one time."

You paused, trying to think of a time when he did or said something incorrect, but unfortunately, nothing came to mind. You rolled your eyes. "I don't know," you admitted finally, earning a smug look from Miguel. "But one day, you'll have to admit you were wrong about something," you insisted, "and I'll make sure I'm there to see when you do."

"You may be waiting for a while," he remarked. You hummed thoughtfully, tracing a finger over the outlines of his face. "I’m a patient person," you stated simply. "And you never know. That day could come sooner than you think."

He stared up at you in amusement. "If you say so," he replied. "Though, I wouldn't use 'patient' as a word to describe you." You raised an eyebrow in interest. "Oh? And what would you use?" You asked smoothly.

Miguel pretended to think as he slowly stroked his fingers up and down your back. "There are a lot of words I could use," he began. "Stubborn is probably at the top of the list." You rolled your eyes, trying and failing to suppress a smile. "And?" You prompted, feeling genuine interest in how he perceived you.

"And..." he thought for a second, "passionate."

You smirked at him and raised an eyebrow. "Oh, yeah?" You said smugly. Miguel's lips also turned upwards in a subtle smile. "Not just sex," he clarified. "You're passionate about being Spider-Woman, and you care about the people around you. You're...kind."

Your stomach fluttered a little bit. You could tell he wasn't just saying that. The sincerity in his voice as he spoke was perfectly clear.

You smiled softly at him. "Keep going," you urged, though you were still trying to seem aloof at his words. He hummed thoughtfully. "You're strong," he listed. "You're fast. You're smart."

"Don't forget funny," you added.

Miguel gave you a skeptical look. "I didn't," he said. "It's just not on the list."

You couldn't stop yourself from laughing at that. "Shut up," you chastised, lightly smacking his chest as you recovered from his joke. His eyes gleamed as he stared up at your laughing face. There was a brief moment of silence as he looked up at you with half a smile on his lips before he murmured, "You're beautiful."

Two words and your heart was beating furiously in your chest. You were struck dumb, unable to think of what you could say to appropriately respond to him. He had called you pretty a dozen times, and you logically knew that he found you attractive based on your many encounters, but it wasn't just the words he spoke, it was how he said it—softly, earnestly, like it was something too precious to be said aloud.

And there was that three-word phrase again whispering in your mind. You could never say it, you knew that. It would be awkward, uncomfortable, and even potentially ruin your standing in the Society, but none of those reasons could stop you from thinking it when he was gazing up at you with his soft, brown eyes with a subtle smile on his full lips.

Miguel must've realized you were having trouble coming up with a response. Breaking the half-awkward silence around you, he said, "But you know what word I would use to describe you right now?"

You were pulled out of your stupor by his question, your face growing warm in embarrassment. "Hmm?" You hummed curiously.

"Treacherous," he replied simply.

Your eyebrows scrunched in surprise. "Treacherous?" You repeated. "How so?"

He lifted his head up just enough so that your lips were barely touching before whispering, "Don't think I don't know what you're doing right now."

You blinked down at him innocently. "What am I doing?" You whispered back, your lips grazing his softly.

He let you place a ghost of a kiss to his lips before finally replying, "Stalling." With that, he began sitting up off the bed, forcing you to roll off his body. "We have to go.”

You draped your arm over your eyes with a groan. He knew you too well. You had hoped he wouldn't notice you trying to drag on the pillow talk to keep him there with you. Now, it seems you’ve run out of time.

Miguel sat up off the bed and stretched. You watched how the muscles in his back flexed tightly before he stood to get dressed. Sighing, you also sat up, grabbing your underwear from off the floor where Miguel had discarded it the previous night before walking to the bathroom.

When you came back out, Miguel was already dressed in his suit, his hair slicked back in his typical fashion. He noticed you emerging from the bathroom and tossed you your web shooters. Catching them, you placed them on your wrists and watched as your suit enveloped your body.

He must’ve seen the wonder on your face because he said, “I told you it’s cooler than nanotech.” You smiled at him. “It is,” you conceded, stepping over toward him. “I don’t think I ever said thank you.”

He smirked down at you, his gaze flickering back and forth between your eyes and your lips. “I don’t recall that you ever did,” he replied. You placed one hand on his chest and let it wander up to his neck. Even on your tiptoes, he was too tall for you to kiss, so he had to follow your prompting hands and lean over to kiss you.

When you broke away from Miguel, you whispered, “Thank you.” He wore a soft smile on his lips as he whispered back, “You’re welcome,” before pressing them back to your mouth. Kissing him was so addicting, and you regretted having to leave once again.

Pulling away from you, Miguel sighed. “Listen,” he started, “finding the anomaly needs to be our first priority now.” You nodded in agreement, but you could sense there was more he was going to say. “That means,” he continued slowly, “no distractions.”

You studied his face for a second before you understood his implication. “You mean this?” You asked, your stomach tightening anxiously as you thought about him cutting you off. “Yes,” he replied before quickly adding, “until the anomaly is caught.”

You frowned. You had no idea how long that could take. The anomaly, ‘Ghost’ as he had been nicknamed, had already been at large far longer than any of you could have guessed, and he could stay in hiding between universes for far longer.

Miguel apparently could tell what you were thinking, and he raised one of his hands up to hold your chin gently. “You are a distraction for me,” he told you. “Now, I put you on the team because you can be useful, but I can’t be here lounging around with you when I need to be preparing for this, understand?”

You sighed in resignation. It made sense. As much as you didn’t want to admit it, it made sense. He was trying to run this whole operation by himself, and even though you wanted him to stay with you, you knew that you were just being selfish.

“Yes,” you replied reluctantly. He nodded, his thumb running back and forth along your chin gently. “Good,” he said. “I’ll see you at the meeting at 12.”

You sighed again. “Alright, I’ll see you there.” You turned to walk toward the door, but when Miguel called out your name, you paused and turned back around. He stepped toward you purposefully, and your heart leapt as you thought he was going to let you stay a while longer.

With his body hovering close to yours, he reached a hand out to grab your arm gently. You let him lift it up, your eyes never leaving his face as you noted how close his lips were to yours, but he wasn’t looking at you. He was looking down at your gizmo and was tapping away at the screen.

Confused, you looked down to see what he was doing. You watched as he pressed the button marked ‘silent,’ effectively disabling the setting you had it on. “No more of that either,” he told you with pointed look.

You gave a guilty smile. “Fair enough,” you conceded, taking back your arm. “But just so you know, I think this new rule of yours is a good idea, because now I’m going to catch this anomaly so fast, it’ll make your head spin.”

He smiled in amusement at your statement. “If you do,” he said, “I’ll fuck you until you can’t speak.” You raised an eyebrow at him. “You already do that,” you pointed out. He shrugged. “Not anymore,” he countered evenly. You shrugged back at him and replied casually, “But soon enough.”

With that, you turned back to the door with a smirk on your face and the determined notion that you were going to be the one to catch the anomaly.

[earlysunshines]

⚠️ WARNING - long ask ahead, don't tell I didn't warn, sorry in advance guys 🤟

IM ERWITING THIS AS I GO ON THE FIC, which means omw to work, which means ill be all day thinking of this dani BC THE "the woman has a few moles on the right side of her face" GOT ME GOOOD yeees I love mo dani little moles sooo much.

(this all may be out of place? is just comments bc I'll probably explode if I dont write it down already so,,,

A CHET BAKER CD?? OUCH you have a good taste (played jazz for a while after it cause I was already wanting to hear since hanni recent live listening to the lp she brought, that was such a great live)

loved the way you played with the shelter 'care' word bc of the kang going first AND it was so funny haerin going like "your girl is just that way if you want to know" she is a little menace

ok so beach jazz scene, just got chills from them looking at each other and singing the same line cause I put to play the song too yk immersion, AND ARRURGH THE slip up and calling dani beautiful oh pls n dani still staring like i can imagine her goofy little teasing smile at yn bc of It oh oh they're so in love,, im just getting started aren't I?

yn just noticing dani has been talking about her when minji mentioned likejjhh giiirl I knew since haerin mentioned the same line dani had said about yn eyes. n ooooh you didn't continue the twinflame book c'mon (loved the bit of it)!!! it was getting interesting

also really important part; the way you always highlight the action of dani tilting her head squeezes my chest everytime i. swear . im weak for it

THEY KSSED 😭😭😭oh dani's tatto they're- WELL THEY KISSED !!! UARGH cuties

okaywait was so engaged reading that I forget this here, so the bathroom scene remind ME about the time thing, tbh I think you did this all fluffy scenes on purpose making us forget abt the plot, funny how wait this about to be big, like since when I read the summary I got surprised with this concept of death time tattoo, usually is 'time until you meet your soulmate' kinda of thing SO never read this plot before AND since the start I was like, afraid? of finishing this one like idk it it all comes to a end yk? idk shit you made me thoughtful, going back to read

OOP CLOSE THE DOOR??🫣? IM SEATED oh to hold danielle waist and and...😔 "maybe im your twin flame"YOURE😭MO DANI 😭 YOU ARE arhg youre giving me anxiety my dear writer

NOO YN don't isolate yourself oh if you're giving us another heartbroken dani im about to cry

LAST THEN 48 HOURS??? WAIITWAIT I want my fluffy where is fufflism

just thinking abt hyein ms lee and haerin starring at yn like 'is she dead??' gave me such a good laugh ngl

oh you... you made they death day on 722? ah....I swear I thought they were going to die without knowing abt they're soulmates like urgagrhggggsgghh lemme finish this up

before I cry with this little happy alternative universe I wanna say that I LOVED the way everything evolves around the beach, like since her parents till yn on th way of dyin,g it felt so right, the 'day off' where they spent all day gave me a thought like 'oh ms.lee surely planned it bc she knew dani walked on the morning' for me it was planned☝️🤓 (beabadoobee - beaches) <3

...to be honest I dont even know what to say to this one bc this all was just comments so yeah..im...this was good, good. literally spend all my shift thinking about finishing this one, the concept really got me good,, I.. maybe smth personal but i've been so...overloaded for a while so this one hitted soo close and made me want to,, live.. I think I just need a mo dani marsh in my life too

anyways😮‍💨 #really great, #changed my life, #made me cry, they're so many thoughts going on as a write this.. you're truly amazing. wish you a amazing day/week/weekend you deserve the best only!! 🫶

-with many admiration, 🤟

for this long wonderful lovely feedback i will provide. alonnnggg. reply and details plus insights HOORAAY im so glad to hear from u i absolutely love your responses u make me smile always

NO YWAAHAH HER MOLES I LOVE THEEMEMM they’re my fav feature other than her long eye lashes and smile and wait i love every feature muahahhaha

i loooove chet baker i have a like 8 hour playlist that has a lot of his music on there along with others ima. fiend for jazz i live for jazz festivals omfg and i need to find clips of hanni listening to music what!! i didn’t know this happened on her live…

no bc my fav thing ab these fics is that it’s lit up to me i thought i was the funniest person adding “kangs kare” im so #wordplay put me in coach

OMFG JAZZ Scene has some more behind it actually no it doesn’t i lied but basically i was like trying to just write and listen and the jazz playlist was lit on and CHET BAKER played and it was it’s always you and omfg i just ugh i started daydreaming and stopped writing for a moment LLOOL idk jazz makes me really lovey and dovey and emotional i think it’s beautiful it’s like a warm embrace or your lover tracing their fingers over your skin

aahahhshdh i think dani si the type of person to not shut up ab someone she likes and like she won’t even know she likes them yet but everyone around her knows LOL and mmmm detail the first thing dani said was “you have pretty eyes” and i tried to make that the first thing she said in the ending bc they’re twin flames and shit and aahhh repetition and similarity in universes … i’m rambling

ALSO this is so embarassing i had to literally search the difference between soulmates and twin flames and read a small article about twin flames and EVEN WORSE i had to make it sound professional and whatnot bc i had to quote on quote make a book in my fic ?-?:?: if yk what im saying but yeah that was a pain… cannot go on any longer i started making shit up FORREAAALLL all of that was pulled out of my ass i swear

NO BC PPL TILTINT THEIR HESDA IS SO IMPORTANT TO ME AND JUST PERKING YHRIR HEADS LIKE ANY MOVEMENT OF PPLS HEADA is so special to me it shows attention to details and emotion and desire to KNOW and be present in the moment and it’s just… so reassuring despite it being such a small gesture and i have realized over the years that i do it subconsciously with people i love and strangers that i click withINLVOE TJAT DETAIL i will use it in every fic ever idc if it’s repetitive i don’t care. i often tilt my head and whatnot bc im actually very nonverbal in real life usually (im just tired all the time) so i usually hum or give short responses and use my head to gesture the rest of what i need to convey liek this is so important to me guys…

I LOOOOVE writing kissing scenes but also no bc they get repetitive and yeah and also that tattoo hehehehsjwhhd i had to soft launch dani having the same tattoo LOL

i tried to make the whole death thing a little less repetitive and kind of brush over it until it got worse and worse and more serious and the whole concept was cheaply influenced by a movie where the two love interests know that they’re dying bc of their sickness but then i added a set, concrete date for dani and yn to die LOL idk lowk my creative juices were being juiced with this one… i was THINKING … and yeah i tried to fit in as many details and things that you’d have to remember form the beginning or middle idk i just rly like how i structured this one (the pacing is stilll iffy to me but wtv( bc i tried to have things tie together well and whatnot

makeout scene had me giggling and blushing while reading it was inspired by the anon who sent a makeout ask like smth ab “imagine making out w dani for the first time” and originally it wasn’t going to be there but i think it added to their bond and tension and lalalala yeah

no i couldn’t make them.die without knowing they’re meant to be but i had to try to figure out how to make the reveal angsty and i was like might as well have them figure out before they die and SOEAKJNG OF WHICH it took me a good amount of time while at work and making drinks to think of a way for them to die idk this story was so spontaneous and changed a lotLOL

and yes the whole beach thing was lowk inspired by summer strike bc i like the small town environment and how cute the beach is i haven’t even finished the drama im on ep like eight and haven’t watched since a few months ago LOL but i think the beach is just so calming and small towns r just sooo relaxing and nice compared tot he city (that being said i will always be a city girl…) idk beach city energy is just so wonderful and fits dani bc she grew up in newcastle and her whole vlog kinda gave me ideas for the world building and whatnot

i’m glad u love it!! and also just to mention ab the whole personal thing and living

i project a lot into my work and what i put down on the doc. idk if u can tell but i see a lot of beauty in things because i feel like its not worth dying if youre missing out on the intimacy of being loved and loving back plus just general interactions and platonic bonds built (ex: hyein and mrs lee) so like ywaaahh im glad you want to live!! there’s so much out there to experience and trust i understand exactly how u feel i looooowk have a lot of my own problems but writing helps me point out my dreams and things i find wonderful which makes me happy and then ppl enjoy the things that i romanticize and it makes me so so so so happy LOL

did u actually cry like many ppl r saying they cried or shed a tear and idk if i beleive it bc is it REALLT. that sad and emotional (maybe i just critics my writing tm) but yeah IM SO HAPPY THAT U ENJOYED!!!

u have a great week too you’re so sweet and i always love seeing your asks and feedback seriously, thank u!!!!

[moonlight-sonata99]

The dad batch + reader handling omegas growing pains

mentions of: family fights,mood swings periods. Moody older omega!

Raising its child is an experience in itself,however no one is prepared when said children start having mood swings…

A/n: Written on something i've been thinking for a bit, not proofread so please don't mind misspellings!enjoy~

Hunter

I think he would have sought out advice from cut on children,so he knew this was coming

But damN he didn't think it would have been to this extent 

It all started when the bad was on a mission and hunter told omega to stay behind for a bit

…which she did not take lightly.

It resulted in a big fight and omega stomped off to the marauder and hasn't been seen.

 Did he do something wrong?What else could have said?he just thinks he was in the wrong;;

Reader placed a hand on his shoulder and reassures hunter that omega will come around.explaining that omegas at that stage where her body is changing

And boy is she not used to it.

No one is 

Even after hunters, still a bit worried as the batch head off to the ship,his worries go away when reader holds his hand and they walk together.

While the batch enters the ship hunter stays behind

He takes a deep breath before stepping into the marauder 

“Hunter..it's okay. Im sure once were inside it'll be normal”

To which hunter gives the reader a small smirk

“I mean..how it always is' ' reader chuckles.``you can't beat yourself over this.``reader turns to the entryway and enters the marauder and turns back to look at the hunter.

“You ready, Sergeant?”

Echo

Confused asf but concerned uncle 

Mans tries to make omega feel better 

In his own way that is.

However the way he goes about this is, well it's very echo.

He doesn't understand why omega is like this but he'll at least try to

First he’ll figure out what's really bothering her

Which  means that echo will just observe to see what ticks her off

But this just makes things more confusing to him because omega just seems to react to different things at different times.

“Echo?” the readers voice interrupts his thoughts as he raises his head to look at you

“Ah,where have you been?” he asks as you sit down in the pilot seat next to him

“I was talking to omega,” reader replies as they look at view ahead of them,

Echo just stares at reader curious asf

“Just growing pain talks” The reader looks at echo smiling and as echo sits back on the seat as his shoulders relax 

“Ohh…”

“So..you don't have to keep worrying” 

“wha- i was-” he looks at reader frantically 

“Mhm…sure” the reader pats his hand as they lay against the seat and close their eyes.

“Maybe just a little bit…” echo mumbled 

Tech

Ngl i dont think mans would care, leaving the situation to hunter

Buttttt that being said…if it wasn't the reader telling omega what's going on with her.

It would be tech.

I don't even think he would be embarrassed telling her this cause…Is it natural?

Yup, especially period talks. But seeing as the reader is here.

I kinda imagine something like this

“Your body is changing omega. It's nothing to be embarrassed about, It's just the way women's bodies are” Tech says pushing up his glasses while working on a trinket with reader besides him

“I…couldn't have said it better myself” Reader mutters while handing tech a tool.

“But yes,what tech says your body changes as you get older. You may experience things that feel weird or once a day start bleeding out of nowhere .But it's all part of the process” Reader smiles at omega who sits on a crate looking at the pair. 

“I think i get it…It's still kind of..”

“Scary?”

“Yea..” omega mumbles

Walking over to omega reader wraps their arm around her shoulder

“Don't worry,we’ll be here to help you every step of the way”  reader assures her 

“ I do believe I had a helper here?” (moment ruiner XD)

Wrecker

Nah mans is confused to the MAX

But…wrecker being wrecker think he would spoil her (Using hunters credits) buying things to make her feel better

Or just doing things that generally make her feel better.

Such as..

“Wrecker i- i dont think omega needed this much pillows and stuffed toys..” Reader mumbles as and they walked back to the marauder with both of their hands filled with stuffed animals and boxes of treats 

“Nah,I'm sure once omega will feel better again!” wrecker exclaims with a smile

“If you really say so…not sure the gang will agree with this though” reader ponders looking at the stuffed animals and wrecker chuckles

“They’ll just have to deal with it!Let's hurry up! I wanna give this to her as soon as we can!” he starts picking up his pace  

“Alright but- wrecker be honest”

“Huh?”

“Are these all really for omega?”

Crosshair

None for crosshair we all know he would fight omega to the death if she fought with him 

enjoy the gif i pick out XD

[cooki3face]

Hii, first of all I'm obsessed with your readings and your whole blog ♥️

Secondly, I want to share what is happening to me that I can't figure out. This is gonna be so long because it never happened sth like that in my whole life, hope you don't get bored by it 🙈

So, there's this person I started following at half year ago and basically fell in love, at first I was just start-strucked by his looks, then I got to know him a little better not directly tho just by crumbs like he talking with his friends and me watching from afar or how he posted on SM and what he wrote talking about himself and I started feeling even more attached because of his personality, so my love for him went beyond looks and day by day was getting stronger to the point that this year in May I started getting videos about how to manifest in general and there's was a particular tarot reader (my first one) I was fascinated by and started following her yt and then TikTok. This tarot reader posted a collective reading (not about love but I think it was work related) few hours before which it resonated with me so I started looking for others tarot readings in the search section and I suddenly got one while scrolling down which said "this person with blue eyes and that likes rock music is obsessed with you" the gasp I left and literally stopped breathing I was shook because she literally described two important details about my person "blue eyes" and "he likes rock music" and she said other things I resonated with. That's how started my obsession with tarots. And here started coming synchronicities which that time I thought they were coincidences and since May of this year I keep getting synchronicities about this person I'm so in love with.

Another thing which is not less important is that since he came into my life I can't love anyone else like I used to have many crushes and fell easily howevere none of them were mutual and didn't receive any synchronicities about them, but this person.. wow I can't stop thinking about them since August of last year and since May of this year it got "worse" and I keep seeing signs about them since that Month but sometimes they confuse me and sometimes it's like they ant to prove me.

Can you figure out what's that, which I've never ever experienced in my whole life I've never felt so attached to someone even though I've never met them but I saw with my own eyes two signs from them in April which made me scream inside bec one was too explicit but I thought it was a coincidence ngl. Also I've never dated seriously so I still have my V-card even tho I'm almost 30 yo. Oh, and I also got my spiritual awakening in May, as if he triggered it but he has still to have it I think.

Sorry for the essay but you don't have to reply with another essay, don't worry and take your time. I appreciate it 💞💞

ps. sorry for my english

Baby, this sounds like limerance. You don’t know this personal in real life, you only what you’ve observed about him online, you’ve never met this person nor spoken to this person from what I can see and understand. But you’re infatuated and obsessed with this person, so much so that you believe that you’re receiving signs from him or the universe that he likes you back or that you’re meant to be together.

Things like this are difficult to deal with especially when you are a spiritual person, believe in the metaphysical or something of the sort. You have to ask yourself where at some point your spiritual beliefs are crossing a line for you. You have to ask yourself if what you’re experiencing is really the work of your spirit guides or divinely guided or a symptom of child hood ptsd or something like it.

Limerance usually it caused by early attachment trauma, I know what it is, I know what it feels like because I’ve been there before. Someone or something that really helped me open my eyes up to this concept and digest it so that I can heal and understand what I was going through and what was really going on with me is The Crappy Childhood Fairy on YouTube. She has a beautiful video on limerence and she shares a plethora of examples on it by using letters from people who’ve reached out to her to help understand their own relationships.

She has multiple videos on limerence and this topic, now this is not to say that magical thinking or spirituality or my practice or lifestyle isn’t real or isn’t worth confiding in terms of relationships and connections but I think you may easily stumble into this direction at times to help validate what it is you’re experiencing, thinking and feeling, I’m sorry if this isn’t what you were expecting and I hope this this is helpful for you to some extent or at least gives you a different perspective. ❤️

[ficsforeren]

Hey Kana! I've been a fan of your writings since the past year and I just wanted to say I love them and the way you reply to your asks ❤️ I just wanted to ask a question. How do you deal with the hate comments? Like doesn't it hurt when someone questions your writings? I'm kinda a baby when it comes to tumblr and I just received my first hate comment and it felt really bad. I'm really sorry if I'm bothering you. I just felt like you're someone I should consult about this.

Hello, darling! Thank you so much for sending me a message and you're not bothering me at all! I'm happy that you reached out to me! I don't think I'm the best person to seek advice from but I'll try my best to help! It gets a bit long under the cut, I'm sorry 😭

I have received a few hate comments in the past when I just started writing. Some of them were pretty traumatizing ngl and I had to take like a year break because of it 🥲 so I know how you feel and how upsetting it is. I'm so sorry that this happened to you, sweetheart 😭I'm sending you the biggest hug right now. Nobody in the world deserves a hate comment, especially when you're a writer/artist who creates stuff for free.

I just checked your blog to see the hate comment you were referring to (I hope you don't mind 😭) and I saw that some anon was mad because you wrote a smutty fic involving a character that's still a minor in canonverse.

Now, honey, I'm 10000000% on your side because a) it's your fic, your work, your blog, as long as you've put up some warnings, you can write whatever the hell you want. b) you've aged them up in your fics but even if you didn't age them up in your fics, that still doesn't make it okay for these people to be rude and attack you for it cause they're FICTIONAL. These characters are not real people with real life problems, they're literally just a bunch of drawings. That anon is spending their energy defending lines on paper and hurting a real person in the process.

Tbh I feel like this happens pretty often no matter what fandom you're in and I find it super weird that some people are actually upset about this. It's fiction! It's not real! And it's not like you support the stuff that's happening in the story! Like if you write about character A killing someone, it doesn't make you a murderer. It doesn't mean you support the act. If you write about incest, it doesn't mean you want to sleep with your dad or your brother. It's simply just for the plot, to make the story interesting. To share your ideas and be creative about it. And, the most important thing is, you're not forcing these people to read your fics, are you? They decided to read them on their own. And if you already wrote the warnings and they CHOSE to ignore them, that's their fault. It's like you see a bowl of hot peppers and you know they're spicy as hell but you choose to eat them anyway and when your tongue is on fire, you get angry "WHY IS THIS THING SO SPICY" like what????

A message for that anon: When you read stuff you don't like (stuff that someone wrote for FREE, stuff that someone spent hours or days creating it), the easiest thing you can do is just close the tab. Literally it takes zero energy to do it. Don't attack these writers with hate comments. Don't hurt their feelings. You don't know how hard they've worked on the story, their struggles in real life, or how insecure they are about their writing. One bad comment and they might stop writing forever, even when it's something that brought them comfort before. There are millions of other fics out there that you can read. Just scroll away and move on.

[bridgertonbabe]

Can I just say I absolutely love all of your mischievous William drabbles in all your AUs?! He’s so cheeky and troublesome. Poor Benedict seems to be at his wits end. Would you be able to write something where Will & Benedict have a really sweet / serious heart to heart (in any of your AUs)?

Ah yeah, ngl William has become a favourite of mine to write due to how much of a little shit he can be 😂 And Benedict probably ends up muttering on a daily basis "that boy will be the death of me" because of all the mischief is youngest son gets up to.

But of course, in spite of the clown persona William wears like a badge of honour, there is a sensitive side that he very rarely shows. I'm going to opt for this heart to heart between father and son to be set in the Harry Potter AU as Benedict offers William some words of wisdom.

"William?" Benedict knocked on his son's open bedroom door before entering to find him lounging in a beanbag chair with a faraway look in his eye. "I'm just about to help myself to a slice of your mum's blueberry pie, did you want me to cut a slice for you as well?"

William broke out of his pensive reverie, blinking in his dad's direction and Benedict was about to head off and cut two slices anyway, knowing how predictable his son was when it came to matters of the stomach - but then something unusual happened.

"No thanks."

Benedict felt as though he had been hit with a stunning spell. In fact, maybe he had. He honestly wouldn't have put it past his youngest son to have perfected a non-verbal stunning spell to cast on him in order to run off downstairs and have the remainder of the pie to himself.

"Really? You're telling me you're not hungry?"

"I'm really not." William said with a beleaguered shrug.

"Merlin's beard; are you okay?" Benedict frowned and approached his son, now thoroughly concerned with his son's welfare - he had never known his son to not be hungry or turn down food of any kind.

"Yeah, 'm fine." William replied and slumped down further in his beanbag.

Benedict wasn't buying it. For a second he briefly considered that this was all an act William was putting on and once he had fallen for it his son would pull the wool over his eyes - but no, it couldn't be; he knew William too well and he knew his son's glum demeanour was genuine.

He brought a hand to William's forehead to check his temperature but it was perfectly normal.

"Are you feeling under the weather? Do you feel lethargic? Fatigued?"

"I'm fine, dad." William insisted.

Benedict looked down at his son who was avoiding meeting his eye, and while he knew William would have preferred for him to just walk away, he couldn't in good conscience turn his back on him when he knew his son was going through something.

Instead he settled down in the neighbouring beanbag chair and quietly waited. They sat there in silence for several minutes and Benedict was sure it was the longest he had ever gone being in the same room as William without his son making a single sound. But then, just when he began to think William wouldn't speak at all -

"I don't know what to do." William uttered in an uncharacteristically small voice.

"About what?" Benedict pressed gently.

"I... I've upset someone. Someone I really care about." William revealed and scratched the back of his neck, which was a sure sign he was particularly uncomfortable about what was being spoken about.

"What did you do?" Benedict enquired (though he thought a better question would probably be "what didn't you do do?").

"That's the thing. I have no idea." William shook his head cluelessly. "I've gone over everything in my head again and again and again to try and figure it out but I've got nothing."

"Have you tried asking them what it is you did wrong?"

"They're avoiding me. Not responding to me. Not giving me the time of day. Nothing."

Benedict grimaced and sympathised for his son. He knew the greatest way for a person to cause his son any emotional upheaval was to give him the silent treatment; it positively killed him. William, who thrived off of attention at all costs had never been able to cope with being ignored. It was a concept lost on him and the practice served as a form of torture for William Bridgerton. Who was he if people weren't laughing at his jokes or enraptured by his conversation or amused by his antics?

"I see."

"I just don't get it. What could I have done wrong to make them stop wanting to have anything to do with me?"

"Well,"

"And before you say everything I do is intentionally wrong; no, it's not. I might tease and take the piss out of most people but she's one of the only few that I don't."

It was quite a fascinating insight. Benedict was aware that it was a rare feat for anyone to escape William's wind-up wrath, and the only person he knew who William left out of his campaign of annoyance was his dear mother. William might joke around with Sophie but he never mocked her and he certainly never pranked her like he did every other resident of My Cottage. He wondered who else William had chosen not to pick on - and it intrigued Benedict to hear that this person was a "she".

"And why's that?"

"Why's what?"

"Why is she exempt from being on the receiving end of your mischief?"

"Because." William replied and for a beat Benedict thought that was all he was going to get. "Because she doesn't deserve it. She's the sweetest person I know. I wouldn't dream of doing or saying anything to even remotely annoy her."

Blimey. Benedict thought to himself. He wondered if the "she" in question knew just how much power she had over William for him to not want to annoy her in any way.

"So why has she stopped talking to you?"

"That's what I would like to fucking know." William grumbled and folded his arms crossly. "I haven't said anything that she could take in the wrong way and I haven't done anything that would warrant her being upset with me."

Benedict glanced at his son and saw the way his green eyes shone with growing despair. His heart went out to him and it genuinely pained Benedict to see his youngest son suffering the way in which he was. It was so very rare that William was ever vulnerable and to bear witness to it it was almost jarring.

"She means a lot to you." Benedict observed.

"Yeah." William grunted. "She's... she's my best friend."

Benedict couldn't help but feel a little puzzled, seeing as he didn't actually know of any girl best friends that William had. Sure, his son was popular and there were definitely friends in his life that were girls; but none he had mentioned too prominently to make Benedict think that any of them were his son's best friend.

"I thought we'd always be friends. That nothing could get between us. But now all I get from her is radio silence. And I feel like it's something that I've done wrong because why else would she stop being my friend? I mean, have you ever had something like this happen?"

Benedict couldn't stop the snort that exhaled from his nose.

"What happened?" William clocked his head with interest towards his dad. "Did you upset someone?"

"Oh. Big time." Benedict nodded as memories flashed back from his disastrous times of yearning after Sophie before they had gotten together.

"Well did you make things right? What was the resolution?"

"Yeah I made things right. Then I married her and we went on to have four children together."

William sat up straight. "What?" he squawked. "You and mum fell out before you got together? How is that possible?"

Benedict found his son's genuine shock rather adorable. His children found his relationship with Sophie to be so lovey-dovey and filled with such unyielding love that he supposed it made sense for any of them to find the fact they had once gone several years without properly speaking mind-blowing.

"Because I managed to mess things up. Twice. And I didn't even realise what I had done until your Uncle Phillip spelled things out for me."

"Merlin's beard, dad. What did you do?"

And then Benedict launched into all the ins and outs of the beginnings of his relationship with Sophie. How he had suddenly recognised his feelings for her after a kiss at the Yule ball, the comments he had made that she had overheard, how they both acted as if nothing happened and yet Sophie distanced herself from him altogether, how much he pined over her in the interim, how bringing a stop to a drunken kiss (there was no need to mention to his son that it was far more than a kiss) on a Greek beach led to a miscommunication with Sophie running off crying. William was gobsmacked to learn that his parents relationship hadn't been the smooth sailing he had always believed it to be but nevertheless he listened with intrigue as Benedict recounted how things had finally been amended and how it led to them becoming a couple after years of mutual pining.

"So yeah. It could be worse; you could have screwed things up as badly as I did." Benedict grinned jovially.

"But you didn't technically do anything wrong."

Benedict was flabbergasted by William's remark, not having expected his son to have his back, especially as he had just been regaled with the story of how his dad had greatly upset his mum on two separate occasions.

"You said some comments you didn't mean because you were confused and trying to buy some time to figure out your own feelings. It was just unfortunate that mum happened to overhear you say that at that moment in time. And then you only put a stop to the kiss on the beach because you didn't want her to think you were only kissing her because you were inebriated, plus she stormed off before you got the chance to properly explain. You hardly screwed up, dad. It was just a case of miscommunication and misunderstanding."

Benedict stared with amazement at his son; he was pretty sure this was the first time his son had ever taken his side on anything and he couldn't quite fathom it.

"Regardless, Will, it was all still such a mess. I hurt your mother even though I never intended to and as a result we both spent years yearning for each other. If I hadn't screwed up the way that I did we might have gotten together sooner and then we'd have had even more time together. It's my biggest regret, wasting away nearly seven whole years when I could have changed all of that by simply telling her how I felt." he sighed and reflected on the "what if?" that still occasionally plagued his mind, imagining what might have been had he fully recognised his feelings for Sophie then and there at the Yule ball and acted on them accordingly instead of getting scared. "Will, if this girl means the world to you, then you need to tell her. Don't shy away from the heart of the matter like I did. Cut to the chase and express how you really feel. I don't want you to live with the regret that I do."

"You know what, I think you're right." William nodded slowly. "Maybe I neglected her without realising or maybe there's been some sort of misunderstanding... but you're right, I've got tell her how important she is to me."

"That's the spirit." Benedict smiled and clapped him on the back. "And I know it might seem risky telling a girl that you're in love her,"

"Wait, what?" William spluttered and darted his head towards his father. "I'm not in love with her, dad! She's my best friend and I love her a lot, I care about her; but I'm not in love with her."

Benedict opened his mouth to tell William his fortune, that actually it was plainly obvious that he was in fact in love with his best friend, before thinking better of it. Telling William he was in love wouldn't make the boy see sense. No, he'd just push back against the suggestion even if there was truth to it. Clearly his son was either in denial or just oblivious to his own heart; but that was something William would have to figure out for himself in his own time, as frustrating as it might be for Benedict to sit back and watch.

"Right. My apologies."

"Honestly, dad. Just because you fell in love with your sibling's best friend doesn't mean the same goes for me." William snorted before jumping to his feet and stating his change of heart about the pie and leaving his bedroom.

"Oh, William. You idiot." Benedict muttered under his breath, shaking his head affectionately before following after him.

[chuluoyi]

Hihiii I finally have the time to reply to this!!

AHAHHA you should accumulate all your leave days and go for a long break! If not a short trip to unwind. It'll definitely helppp

RIGHT like UGH this man is so.... UGHH I want to run my hands along his undercut and like HE'S SO PRETTY- I went nuts after watching JJK 0 [I started with the movie idk why] and after watching the series I'm like "I love this man he's so hot and funny at the same time." Then his collab arts... They're always so... He always looks so... Slutty I'm sorry but look at the Dolce and Gabbana art... The Tokyo tower collab too... Idk I can't find a better word to describe him...

Babe I understand that fear it ain't stupid! Not tryna scare you more but I remember when I was like 11? I was on a beach in Phuket when I picked up this super pretty shell buried in the sand. Then uk what? A worm wiggled out of it. I screamed so loud like wtf was that monstrosity 😭😭 I guess a way to prevent sand submerging your feet is to wear sandals or flip flops?

Oh man I never expected that you felt like that once too 😭 I understand the mum hanging you part... I think mine would skin me alive and feed me to my dogs... That's good to hear! I'm really glad you found a job to your liking. Thanks for the advice Chu!🥲🥲 You have no idea how much I appreciate that. It feels like my friends from Secondary school know what they're doing and are slowly leaving me behind ngl... One of my friends is in the same course as me, but in different schools. She got a GPA of 4.0 for the first semester... and cause I flunked my Econs and AI class I got like a 2.9... So yeah I really appreciate your encouraging words 😭

SUSHI ROLL HAHAHA HELPPPP HAHAHAHA Okay but I'm sure you're not like short short. I'm not that tall either ahhaha!

Queen SLAY AHAHHA they definitely deserved it! Even if you didn't speak up, I'm sure someone else would've done the same sooner or later. Fr they're so annoying bruh

Omg nice! Okay to me, "A good day to be a dog" is good. Maybe cause I'm still halfway through... But so far it's good! I find the plot pretty unique! Omg I added Gyeongseong creature to my list ahah! Yeah it actually looks good! Ngl I wasn't a fan of sweet home but I wanna watch Gyeongseong creature cause of Park Seojun hehehe I loved "What's wrong with secretary Kim?" so much!

RIGHT I'M SO SORRY BUT HE'S SO SEXY IN THAT UGHHH

Yes... It's always the food and snacks.... Omgod I get it. Like it's always about exam results and once I'm old enough they'll probs start talking about finding a boyfriend... Then it'll be a job... I'm not ready 🥲🥲 But Fr the only thing I look forward to is the 红包 like trust me I've been ready since last CNY. Take the money as our prize money for enduring the relatives' questions heh. I'm so surprised you celebrate CNY too tho like no offence but I really didn't expect that...

Dissolved is an understatement... Idk I'm probs the one dissolving... HELP confessing your sins?! 🫠🫠 All I did was to pray to my flower agate tower... Did it work? It probably didn't. But it was worth a try! Crystal manifesting is a stressful process you know?

Nono I'm really not smart I just grinded my ass off... I hate my education system..... AND FR Lit is annoying in that sense but I mean it's the closest thing to reading and writing that I have so...

YEAHH They're so cute! I think I have a soft spots for animals in general AHAHH

Exercise... 🫠🫠🫠🫠 What's that?

Thanks sm Chu!! I will! I'm waiting for 3rd March to come cause I'm going for Taytay's concert woohooo That's probably the only good thing that's gonna happen to me this year so I'm gonna cherish it!

Also I'm so happy to be your first emoji anon It's an honour 😫😫

AND your Marius card! He's so hot in that omg and Rosa... ROSA IS SO PRETTY DGSDVXDHJ AHH

I managed to get Luke from the free 10-time! And I'm tryna get Artem now! I haven't gotten an Artem card in ages... Also what do you think about the new event? I think it's pretty cool! Much better than the others!

-🪩

disco anonn!! i finally can sit down to reply you!!🥹

i'm so doing that!! i plan to take a week-long vacation too in mid year so that i can leave everything in the dust ehe

HAHAHAHAHAH omg that's precisely also my reaction!!😫 you know i first came to know gojo not from jjk but from @/saintobio's sincerely not series. and he is written a prick there so i didn't have a good impression🥲 but then my bf roped me into jjk and then i see it firsthand and AAAA i'm down so bad for this prick uHHHH and that's so true the power behind that undercut is so🥲 that's totally okay i think of him as the best slut there is AHAHAHAH

A WORM😭😭😭 i'd flip and fall😭 i do wear flipflops but still... what's flipflops gonna do against the sand?🫠 during my company retreat last year, i wear flipflops and but my feet would crash against... rocks?🫠 it hurts *sobsobsob* and it got inside my nails i was like 😭

AHAHAHHAAHAH THAT'S SO TRUE OUR MOM😭😭😭 aww you're very much welcome!! i wished someone would say that to me too and i'm glad that you're encouraged🥹 ahh don't worry! GPA isn't everything. in real world, what matters the most is our communication skills and how we present myself🥹 not to brag, but my last GPA is 3.56 and my friend's is like 3.9-ish (nearing perfect omg) but now i got the better exposure and ratings🥲 my team leader says that's because i make friends with everyone and do presentations better than her (simple things like presentations matters a lot apparently i just knew it🥲) but that's not to say that we should ditch our GPA... just study well and do your best! <3 God will do the rest i assure you! don't give up, disco anon!! <3

i relate to you, me and my friends used to be a group of 6, but now the one who sticks with me is just one🥹 it hurts but sometimes that's just the way it is... especially when we don't share the same interest...

I'M A WALKING SUSHI ROLL REALLY AJAISJDAOISJDAS

okay i think there are at least 3 people saying that a good day to be a dog is good so... i relent🥹 i'll watch it!! PARK SEOJUN is so dayum there omg he's so pristine and aisjdoasjda okay i'm totally normal about him... totally... normal... the plot is unique and i love it but yes, i do have to agree that the CGI looks a bit off🥲 but pay that no mind and just look at park seojoon🥹 everything will be well AHAHAHA

HAHAHAHAHA OMG WE'RE SO THE SAMEE i used to get the boyfriend asks a lot and they even tried to set me up!!😭 thank god i found a bf already or else they'll start putting me up for sale😭 that aside, don't take those questions to heart, that's just how nosy aunties are🥹 ah fyi, i'm of chinese descent so i totally celebrate the chinese new year and all of those praying anniversaries that i... don't remember a single thing about🥲

HAHAH THAT'S SO FUNNY pls disco anon don't dissolve😭 omg flower agate tower?? i lit looked it up... what is this?🥹 it looks cute and it says it's for healing... (pls correct me if i'm wrong because... most likely i am...)

oh my!! i'm so happy for you!!🥹 honestly some people in my office have gone to her concert too and i'm interested... but i'm not a fan of being squished in the spectator stands🥲 wishing you to have the most fun there!! <3

ADAKSJNDAKSJDA omg marius he's draining my schips and NOW I WANT LUKE TOO BUT AKDASDA I CAN ONLY DEPEND FROM THE DAILY(?) FREE PULLS AND I HAVEN'T GOTTEN HIM STILLL i forgot that it's the pilot card that i've been looking forward too omg i was so in for the suspense and all but i was too blinded by marius😭 YES it's so fun! tbh during bakerlon and the cafe event i was like ??? many times but here it's so engaging and everyone looks so pretty!!🥹 rosa in chinese qipao is sooo pretty godsssss i don't usually stan for girls but she's the only exception!!

have you caught up with the main story and all? honestly i haven't been able to catch up with it🥲

[bbnibini]

apothecary diaries anon again! sorry for replying late, the past few days were busy. 😭

I ENCOURAGE READING THE MANGA, THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT EXPRESSIONS!! it's also great with mood whiplash scenes; one moment i can be fawning over how pretty the art is, the next i'm staring in awed silence at the dark parts of the story. like, the scene where maomao is at lihua/rifa's palace is AMAZING. (i totally get what you mean with manga too! i don't buy manga as much any more because digital tends to have better quality and is easier for me to read. plus, there's something about having a novel in my hands that doesn't compare to holding manga, if that makes sense?)

no problem; i'm glad to share the good news about the LN! i usually buy just the paperback and read that in bed because 1. comfy cosy vibes, and 2. easier on my eyes. (i also don't think it's weird; i've bought multiple copies of games over the years because i enjoy having access to it on different consoles (and enjoy modding them, in case of games on pc.))

agreed! the love triangle / having two people compete over a third person dynamic in isekai is just… awkward. especially in some manga/manhwa where it's obvious who the main couple is? it makes all the interactions so forced and usually leaves me either annoyed with the plot or the characters themselves (and not in the way the author probably intended). ngl, i am a lover of morally ambiguous male characters, but it's so weird how people condemn female characters for being rude, but the dudes all get 'oh, but he has ✨reasons✨' or grasp at straws to justify it. even when the women also have reasons or backstories to explain why they do what they do?

i also get annoyed when i see the female lead get bashed in comments for not being 'strong enough' when usually the FL has either been abused, traumatised, or just?? cries because they've been through so much??? it's like the FL can only be praised if they're going through their struggles the 'right' way, and emotions aren't allowed. like, no! give me all the characters and their responses; give me the characters who repress their feelings AND the characters who wear their hearts on their sleeves!

let women support women! 👏👏👏

unrelated to the above, i started ascendance of a bookworm! i was at chapter 13 and crying from lutz and myne's friendship + wanting otto's love and citizenship in a side story. then i read further and started crying for an entirely different reason and OW MY SOUL. currently up to chapter 26, i'm both proud of my kids and just want to hug them. (also, i love how they deal with myne having a weak body; i have issues with my own body, and it's nice to see it taken seriously and also not instantly cured via plot magic.)

hope sleep and work has been better for you!

Aaaaa sorry if this got buried in my notifs! I only saw this now after logging in to tumblr desktop!! YOU GET ME FR- 🤝I think it also has to do with its formatting?? Collecting manhwa is okay for me for certain series, but reading manga backwards is just really awkward. I can't get used to its physical formatting. Using the panels as reference for practicing art had been my goal buying manga and manhwa but I really just don't enjoy the drawing process. ;;v;; I think it also has to do with that lol. I love art but I get giddier and enjoy reading pretty words better!! I love reading in bed too but my optometrist scolded me for doing that cause it made my eyes really bad xD. I do still read in bed but not as much anymore cause of that ssh don't tell her /s

Right?? It's just so sad misogyny is still blatant in fiction. It's already happening irl and you can't even use fiction as escapism cause it's there too. :'( I like it when series write good characters. Ultimately for me, that's what how you can tell a writing is good; if they can separate that. That's why I love Apothecary Diaries; you fall in love with Maomao as a person. She's a great character who just happens to be a girl. You love her for who she is, and not because she's a woman, or the narrative tells you a bajillion times she is a "badass female protagonist so you should love her!!!" (which she is ofc but that's not the entirety of Maomao's personality. She's more than that!! And I love her for more than just that.) JgdghgjI I just love female friendships so much. I wish we have more in shoujo and series in general. I want platonic female friendships; sapphic relationships, all of them. I love women. Funny you mentioned that cause I wish people would stop seeing femininity as a weakness cause it's not!! It's really ironic seeing people say a female character is "strong" because she's physically strong and have masculine traits, but have no substance or character development beyond that. To strengthen my point above, a female character is a great character because she was a great character to begin with and does not depend on harmful stereotypes just so they can be written lazily as "female" (I hope I'm making sense).

I'm so happy you liked it! Bookworm is so well-written and incredibly detailed in worldbuilding, lore and character development it's almost intimidating! I love its realistic portrayal of human relationships and disability; of found family and loneliness. Its focus on the world and the people around it makes the characters a lot more...believable(?) Like you can feel that they have lives outside of their interactions with Myne. Myne is just a heartbeat of a human life trying to survive in the unfair caste system she is born in. assidfsf. Fr I feel like I'm Myne's parent; seeing her grow, seeing her achieve her dreams and be happy and live like a normal girl makes me cry. I really recommend reading the LN of part 2 especially the last volume. I bawled like a baby in one of the scenes. Her family is just so wholesome. ;;v;; Sorry for rambling. I love this series so much and I've been trying to hold back reading my backlog cause I know I would finish it in just a few days.

[robo-cryptid]

I wasn’t expecting such a lengthy answer, but thank you for taking the time to reply at all (although I have the feeling this was a bit cathartic for you, so I don’t feel too bad about making you answer that).

I’m glad you still love them, and that you still make content for them. The friend who sent me your fics has said wonderful things about you, and she respects you for your ability to enjoy fandom spaces while also being critical of them.

On the other hand, what you said about what the fandom did to you scared me a little, ngl. The way you described it sounds… awful. And I’m sorry you and your friends had to go through that. I kind of feel bad that you wrote such an lengthy explanation just for me, and I was still left a bit confused about why exactly you’re still here, but perhaps what Yeehan means to you is far more important and has more weight than whatever pain they caused you.

I really hope you can keep enjoying the ship in the future. I really like their dynamic and their potential so I will keep enjoying these two as much as I can as well. Have a good night/day!

Hah, you're right. It was indeed cathartic to just let those things out. Besides, I sort of suspected some of the people who've been around a while might like the validation that yeah, all those things happened, and other new people might wonder what in the world made some of us so jaded, lol. So it was a little for me, a little for you, a little for them.

Honestly, as for it scaring you off, I think it's worth remembering this was five years of accumulated nonsense, with a lot of time in between each event for some relative peace, I guess. I'd also say most of those behaviors have Yeehan-specific versions, but you can find them in most internet fandoms, unfortunately. And I can't quantify the people I've met and friends I've made, but I can assure you that while there are definitely some drama-mongers and people with no manners, there are also tons of really nice, talented people around here. So it just depends on what kind of tolerance you have for fan behaviors and how good you are at maintaining your boundaries, lol.

I'm glad you've enjoyed it so far, anon, and I hope the, uh, fan history lesson didn't make you too scared to poke around and see what parts you like. <3

[clit-eastwood-spicy]

🌗💕📚💎📒🎤🎁 heh heh

AAAA SORRY IT TOOK SO LONG, I'VE BEEN TRYING TO WAKE UP ENOUGH TO HOP ONTO MY PC TO MAKE THE REPLY PROCESS EASIER SKDJUFSDF

Honestly I love a good mix of both fluff and angst. Depending on my mood it can be just one or the other but writing both together is just so <3

2. I am nothing if not a self-ship monster. It's legit all I write. Generally I use like... ocs for it but I kinda use bits of myself for all my ocs anyway lmao. Someday I might try branching out and do reader x canon type stuff but for now it's just my ultra self-indulgent shit lmao

3. I think the fandoms I've wrote for the most so far is the MHA / BNHA fandom and Pokemon? I had an ultra-long Pokemon/Naruto crossover fic I wrote when I was like 14 that was like 50-ish chapters long and yet somehow still unfinished lmao. I still have that shit but I reuploaded it to Google Docs to make sure I never lost it, even if some of it makes me cringe now lmao

4. Forbidden love is a vibe I really dig ngl. Esp like.. older x younger type vibes where the younger person just like... absolutely lights up the older persons gloomy heart and makes them feel young again in a good way. I've also been really into soulmates type stuff lately. Also stuff with like A/B/O vibes but like I kinda cherry pick that stuff and rework it a bit for my own personal writing vibes.

5. I have a legit wasteland of barely started / half finished fics. I have only finished one and I have no idea how I managed to get the self-control to only make it 4 pages long ngl lmao. I really wanna go back and rewrite a few older fics but that's a lot of time and energy for someone like me (ADHD/Autism brain that hates doing something that feels unfulfilling in the moment lmao). Someday I hope to finish something longer though.

6. Honestly it's more an entire section lmao. The entire plot point was that my oc Riley was trying to ask probing questions in regard to my friends oc I wrote into the story, named Iseiah, who was in love with this character named Zisu and because of how Riley asked Zisu mistook it for Riley asking her out and any time Riley would attempt to interject Zisu would cut her off so the next day at lunch they're all sitting at the table and Zisu slips that Riley 'asked her out' and Iseiah loses his shit because he had just told Riley how he had feelins for Zisu. In his anger he didn't give Riley much of a chance to explain but accidentally let it slip that he was in love with Zisu. In that particular scene he says a lot of shit but my absolute fave line was “OH I SEE HOW IT IS, I TELL YOU I’M IN LOVE WITH HER AND YOU FUCKING STEAL HER, RIGHT UNDER MY NOSE! YOU RUG PULLING BITCH! I’VE BEEN WAITING YEARS TO ASK THIS GIRL OUT, BUT LO AND BEHOLD, LIL MISS AMNESIA FALLEN FROM THE SKY DECIDES SHES GONNA STEAL MY FUCKING GIRL!" and honestly I frequently quote "You rug-pulling bitch!" lmaoo. Best part was that Zisu is built like a bodyguard and legit took him down and pinned him to keep him from causing a scene lol. Just genuinely one of my absolute fave scenes because of the rollercoaster of shit in it.

7. I don't even think I have the file anymore but the line was "If nothing is real and nothing matters... then why not enjoy it? Allow yourself to live the way you want to for once. With no regrets. Not everyone has that chance. Take it and make this life, however fake it may be, a life worth living." - The fic was from a fucking Justice League / Batman fic of all things lmao

[taintedlxve]

Wild that this was posted when I wasn't around to defend myself. Apologies to the person who sent me this I feel like they were trying to reassure me but all it did was make me mad lol.

Anyways, I'm mentally ill and reading this shit kind of fucked up my day and since I just can't let shit go without correcting the record I'm just gonna go over some things rq and go back to my hiatus. You don't gotta read, but I was called a liar repeatedly and I'm not gonna let that sit.

A lot of Awoo's post screams out to me as "i'm taking accountability but not really" and I just want to point out places where I feel she's being disengenuous and go back to my hiatus bc I had a good vibe going until now lmao.

I'm skipping the really long explanation about why she never followed me, frankly as I've said before my problems with her extend past that entirely and at this point I don't think it matters that much.

I'll just say this, we had a private conversation in which I made it expressly clear it was okay to come to me about something if she felt she had a problem the LAST time she blocked me for no reason (to be clear to this day I don't know what the hell I was supposed to be sorry for?) after I decided to just unfollow her from her breedingacademy sideblog bc she was replying to other folks' stuff and seemed to just ignore mine. She apologized for this and said she'd do better and I believed her. This, primarily, why I didn't reach out at first.

Further in the post she mentions the vent I wrote that was, in fact, 1000% about her. Ngl I forgot I even wrote it and was surprised by how recently it was. I dunno if I'm really sorry about what I said, it's how I felt at the time and just given the context of how I've allowed you to treat me I simply don't trust you like that anymore.

To be clear I had a LOT of dropped threads at the time or wasn't getting responses at all and that was actively fucking with me and making me wanna quit entirely, but Awoo's behavior stuck with me bc she was one of the few whose responses flooded my dash and I just wouldn't be included. Not saying she's lying but frankly frankly even if it was true Idk what to tell you cause that wasn't the reason she gave at the time.

You very much did say "it's nobody's fault" and "my brain works differently" since you're accusing me of malicously taking you out of context and/or misremembering, but unfortunately I can't access the reply in the image attached bc it's been removed. I'll link it here, maybe something's fucky with my tumblr, I thought it might have been from the blog she ended up deleting but nah it takes me back to her current so -shrug-.

To go into further explanation about what she said (bc obviously I wasn't going to commit a post to photgraphic memory in a vent post) it was something to the effect of "sorry, that's just not how my brain works. once you tell me you're tired of something my brain just labels it as 'avoid at all costs'. It's nobody's fault but…" etc. etc.

She mentions she's autistic, which, I know?? She's mentioned it several times over the last 10 years. Most of my friends are neurodivergent with needs unmet. I'm autistic and soon to be tested for ADHD with needs unmet. I understand that life and socialization is extremely difficult for neurodivergent people.

My partner literally has avpd but she understands that ignoring people bc they make her anxious hurts those people and she takes steps to do what she's able to to circumvent those obstacles bc she cares about those people. I'm really over this self-infantilization people leap to to avoid being criticized the negatives things done because of their neurodivergence. Reminds me of when Sara would beef with everyone on dash and say 'Oh it's my depression'.

And it's not like you were unable to communicate. When I said I was playing fem!Izuku is like the ONLY time I've ever had you reach out to me in my DMs unprompted

Sure, maybe I missed the point of your callout post, whatever, but the point of my message was literally all I've ever asked of you was like, to talk to me and you blocked me without communicating again. The diff is I'm just over being gaslit into being nice and feeling like it's my fault.

You trying to push the responsibility back onto me with a "Oh well she never asked if she had a problem with me" in spite of the fact that I went SO far out of my way to accommodate you to the point of giving you different Cyr icons bc you were squicked out by hair covering eyes just puts the nastiest fucking taste in my mouth and it makes me mad tbh.

I cannot stress how much I'm always the one people expect to make the first move and how sick of it I am, that's why I didn't come to you. I'm not a 'coward', I just was done bowing and scraping for people who didn't like me.

If you cared, you had my discord, and it wasn't like I blocked you first. You had ways of contacting me, and you didn't. So the rigamarole of you 'being worried for me' just doesn't pass my smell test, sorry.

Maybe it does make me hypocrite to smell bs when I see it but it definitely doesn't make me gullible.

The rest is just her demanding an apology from me (nah, you first bitch) but, and I wanna be explicitly clear, the feeling is very mutual, I want nothing to do with this chick.

I wanna be very clear that the end result of this was never to rebuild a friendship with Awoo bc again, once she blocked me I realized this wasn't even the bulk of my problem with her, it was the last straw.

I'm don't wanna be friends with someone who publically calls me me disengenuous and makes me feel so bad I end up apologizing.

Or, again, someone who blocks me when I just say "oh, this person doesn't seem to want to interact on this sideblog so I'll just unfollow"

Maybe you're not like that anymore, or your neurodivergence makes you that way, but I just don't want people like that in my life anymore, and I'm done letting people make me feel small for standing up for myself.

I'll cop to calling you a bad person and saying you hate me bc a lot of that was me being in my feelings and I'm not a mind reader, nor do I know you well enough outside of the internet to make these claims.

But as much as you've tried to victimize yourself I 1000% stand by what I said before, I hope you don't treat you muts as shitty as you treated me.

Thank you for confirming tho that you're not sorry I think helps to know

[thehomothings]

Analysis of Kite's conflicting moralities, relationship with death, and the toll reincarnation may take on one's psyche

So, today I decided to compile all the thoughts I have had about Kite's interesting worldview since the first time I saw him into one post, mostly for my own sake, really. If you're familiar with the few posts I've made, you know it's gonna be a mess, but hopefully a comprehensible mess.

A heads up, this is going to be spoiler-heavy, and very much deal with subjects of death and dying as a whole. Also, some of these conclusions are drawn from my own experiences and close brushes with death, I'm not going to go into much detail but it might get personal and definitely dark. I'm not even sure if I can call this a meta-analysis, and I'm obviously no expert, so mayhaps take all of this with a grain of salt.

Been getting into drawing lately, and during the more simple and mindless part of the painstaking process of dotting every single star in this, I let my thoughts wander through the latest part of the fic I'm writing, and I got a better grasp on what exactly made Kite such an elusive character to me.

I'm not quite sure why I got so attached to Kite. Perhaps it was the air of tragedy surrounding him, how despite his sordid past he remained still open and gentle even if outlined by a healthy dose of cynicism.

But sometimes, I think it's the fact that he is so paradoxical. He's brave, yet fears death to such a degree that creates a whole Nen ability around it, is a pacifist yet will not hesitate to spill blood for his own sake or someone else's. Despite the many ultimatums and warnings of 'I will not protect you', he gave his arm and then his life to save Gon and Killua. He approaches each hunt and battle with a clear plan of action in mind, but his Hatsu takes the form of a roulette that gives him random weapons which are never what he wants, but what he seems to need for that exact situation, which he cannot dispel without using. When he draws a weapon, the decision is locked in and his or his opponent's fate is sealed. That's why each time he dubbs his weapon a bad roll. Every time he has to gamble, he sees himself as having run out of luck. When it comes to having to choose between himself and somebody else...well, there had never been a choice. In fact his aversion to using it may feed into its sheer power that we, unfortunately, saw too little of.

Let's go over his very first appearance when he saves Gon from the mother Foxbear.

It's not hard to see the strain searching for Ging has put on him; he's rash, prone to anger and punching a child for daring to get into trouble. In his mind, he's failing at his most important task, has not yet earned the right to call himself a hunter despite being in possession of his very own hunter license.

After killing the mother Foxbear and raging about having done so, he says this interesting line:

So yes, he finds killing for any reason rather irksome as most would do, yet I think something deeper caused him to absolutely lose it in this scene:

He had not been aware of Gon's identity, and despite being an animal lover and a naturalist, he made a choice to save the human instead of allowing nature to run its course. In fact, he says: 'No beast that harms a human must be allowed to live.'

How does one weight one life against another? How is the worth of it determined? The value of life... an impossible choice he's faced with and a choice which he seems to regret to some degree.

The Foxbear cub.

Here, he's speaking from experience, a tangible loss he has felt himself, and a hard and bitter life he does not want to impose on the cub.

His backstory is exclusive to the 2011 anime adaptation but there are hints alluding to it in the manga, for example, the fact that he does not seem to know his birthplace, or:

The choice of words is chilling.

Reading between the lines, one could draw the conclusion that he is an orphan. Something supporting this hypothesis is how he visibly deflates after Gon tells him his parents have (presumably) died.

So we see he is willing to go against his own moral code of not killing as to not doom another living being to the life he led, a lonely, hopeless existence that could barely be called one. He saw it best to put down the cub rather than leave it to die a painful, slow death.

The reason Kite himself isn't as cynical and cold-hearted as one would be after witnessing cruelty in its rawest form is those small crumbs of human kindness which he may have found in Ging.

It was not only a chance at an honorable life being Ging's apprentice gave him, but it also 'saved' him from being broken and twisted into what he hated and worst of all, death.

If we take that one minute of backstory as canon to his character-which I find myself inclined to do- these quirks of his make much more sense. He lived on the run. He lived on the knife's edge between giving up or pushing forwards. He lived as so a wrong move could be the difference between survival and the end.

Between rock and a hard place creates a mentality of black and white, absolute good or extreme evil, this or that. Except in reality, it's much harder than that. Deciding who to save and who to strike down is a heavy burden to bear.

It's almost easy to see how struggling to keep surviving could lend itself to a crippling fear of death and subsequently developing a Nen ability which once more goes against his own moral code in order to give himself a second chance...yet something about it strikes me as unlikely when I look at it this way.

Living life knowing it could end at any moment has the opposite effect, at least for me it did. One comes to accept that it is fleeting and while not eager to let it go, when death eventually and inevitably does come, there is no fighting it.

Especially when there is no hope that tomorrow will be a better day than this one.

Frequent near-death experiences numb one's fear in a way, even if it drives them to take precautions that render it unlikely to happen again and results in c-PTSD, but still, it does. It sparks a certain nihilistic view of 'if it all can end so easily, then what's the point of it all?'

Unless there are things to live for, a sure promise of a better future, and Ging gave Kite that. When he faced the threat of losing his second chance at life:

Really, what else could lead someone to develop the ability of 'the hell I'm going to die like this'?

I think a separate event, an even more brutal near-death experience that almost cost him his life as the hunter he so strived to be set him off to develop the secret roll of Crazy Slots, what I call Roll No.0, Ars moriendi. Unlike other weapons, it cannot come up in random and is directly summoned by him, or better said, summon by his overwhelming will to keep going and hopelessness of fighting a losing battle. I don't believe roll No.3 was the weapon that allowed him to reincarnate. I've named that one Wand of Fortune, a sort of armor instead of an offensive weapon since I find it hard to believe Kite, a Conjurer, would not focus on defences as well, and I will go into both mechanisms of these weapons hopefully in his backstory.

Despite knowing this battle to be a pointless one and being acutely aware of his soon to be demise, he did not immediately draw Ars moriendi, no, he stayed back and fought for the sake of the boys, kept Neferpitou occupied until they could reach safety. We can see evidence of this in the aftermath of the battle that seemed to have gone on until dawn, a torn apart landscape only signaling a fraction of the devastation that was Kite's power unleashed. It still wasn't enough.

In the anime sub I watched, when Gon apologizes to Ging about Kite's death, Ging said a sentence that infuriated me, because it belittled the utter suffering of the NGL trio.

"He would not die in your place." (No screenshot, sorry)

And I remember practically shouting at the screen, screaming 'how could you possibly say that? Of course he did. He absolutely did die in their place. How could you not know your own apprentice? Why-'

It was only last night that it hit me why Ging would say that.

Once upon a time, maybe Kite would not have given his life for anybody under any circumstances, even if he had a way out of it all. He would still need to die to come back to life.

His Thanatophobia could be attributed to the (possibly untreated) PTSD of the near-death experience in his later life, being so certain of dying that finding himself alive afterwards drove him to never want to go through that again. He quieted his fear by creating a sort of a loophole, that even if he lost the battle he would remain. Ging remembered that, but as evidence shows, something changed. Maybe he healed a bit, perhaps growing up dulled his fear to a certain degree, but eventually when it came down to his life or another's, he didn't choose himself.

Now, I can hear you saying 'but he didn't die, so what are you going on about??' And so I reply: Yes, he is alive, but he did die. He experienced that painful, horrible moment of staring death in the eyes and thinking 'This is it, this is the end', went through the actual process of having his soul removed from his body. And that moment stretches into infinity, ten lifetimes condensed into the mere seconds before oblivion.

Dying isn't so hard if one stays dead.

It's not so easy to open one's eyes and find oneself alive again after that, no matter how much that is the heart's desire. It's difficult, nigh-impossible to reconcile with life and walk amongst the living when everything had been so final, when death had been accepted to its fullest.

So Kite awakens, the twin of Meruem and back from the dead, his mind and identity both intact and fractured. In that he is Kite is no mistaking, yet he is not the same gentle pacifist whose first reaction upon sensing a monster's aura was to shield two kids from it at the cost of his arm.

I don't think many of you are familiar with Zoroastrian ideology, but Togashi is known for loving his religious imagery, and it's not only Christianism he derives inspiration from (evidence of which can be seen all over Kite's character and resurrection).

In Zurvanism-a branch of Zoroastrianism- there is talk of the twin spirits: Ahura Mazda -epitome of all that is good- and Ahriman -epitome of all that is evil-, the parent god Zurvin decides that the firstborn may rule in order to bring "heaven, hell, and everything in between."

Upon becoming aware of this fact, Ahriman forcibly tears through the womb to emerge first. Sounding familiar yet?

Zurvan relents to this turn of events only on one condition: Ahriman is given kingship for 9000 years, and then Ahura Mazda may rule for eternity.

Meruem ruled for 40 days, his death leaving the throne vacant for ant Kite, wearing a dead girl's face and seeming to be brewing some nefarious plan. No more is there any sign of that unrelenting pacifism and the sanctity of life he held so high, losing his own may have only served to show him how meaningless the pain and suffering he went through had been, dying only to be reborn as a member of the species that killed him. It may be that he has no desire to rule over the remaining Chimera ants or create an army of his own-

Yet I dread to think what a broken mind possessing limitless power might do to the world.

And that's it. If you made it this far, thank you for reading! If you found it interesting, stay tuned, as I think a lot and I will make it your problem.

[tartagliad]

Seeing you for the first time pt.2 (ft. Albedo, Xingqiu, Venti, and Razor)

summary: how they react when seeing you for the first time

G/N reader

warning(s): misspellings, grammar mistakes (?), some scenes from windblume festival in Venti's and some from Razor's lore and a little angst ig

fluff!

(A/N: hey there, I'm back..this time I wrote for the other characters, i hope you enjoyed it)

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Albedo:

You met this boy at Dragonspine

That boy literally spent 24/7 of his life in that place ._.

He was at Starglow Cavern, painting cave structures and some hilichurls

You entered the cave and continued your adventure there (finding the history about the place)

Suddenly, a bunch of hilichurls started to attacked you..

There he saw how calm you are in that position, just swaying your sword back and forth elegantly

He just stands there and didn't realise that you've finished fighting the hilichurls and stared at him

"You know..it's not nice to just stand there and do nothing" you joke

"Oh..uhh sorry, I kinda zoned out.." he blurts

"ahaha, it's alright..i can see it on your face" you said

Albedo is literally stunned by your appearance, your figure, your eyes, everything

"I'm y/n, are you always go to this place?" you asked him

"Oh uhh, yes actually..i always do some research on this place..I'm Albedo btw" he respond

"Ahh I see.." you said, after that you accidentally saw his paintings

There was a painting of hilichurls and sketches of..you fighting?

"uhh are those your drawings?" you asked him

His face flushed because he got caught sketching a portrait of you

"Uh..yeah, you were an interesting...'view' let's just say..so I decided to draw you" he confess

You actually find his drawings beautiful yet pleasing to look at

"Wow..these are beautiful" you speak

The boy is literally out of words ngl, he's used to get some compliments from other people, but somehow..compliments from you made him flustered

"a-ah..w-why thank you.." he said

"Uhm..maybe you could come and join me next time..maybe pickup some materials or sightseeing areas of Dragonspine" he adds

"Of course, I'll go with you" you said

You two always spend time together at the mountains, well.. even though you don't go there everyday..lol

You always helped Albedo on his 'unusual' experiments or even tell him your stories of your adventures

The boy loves your eyes, he literally could get lost in those beautiful pairs..

Even though he painted it or sketches it..the feel is still different compared to looking at it directly

The feel just makes his heart race..<3

"𝘠𝘰𝘶 𝘬𝘯𝘰𝘸, 𝘺𝘰𝘶'𝘳𝘦 𝘱𝘳𝘰𝘣𝘢𝘣𝘭𝘺 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘮𝘰𝘴𝘵 𝘪𝘯𝘵𝘦𝘳𝘦𝘴𝘵𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘱𝘦𝘳𝘴𝘰𝘯 𝘐'𝘷𝘦 𝘴𝘦𝘦𝘯 𝘴𝘰 𝘧𝘢𝘳 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘐'𝘮 𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘭𝘭𝘺 𝘩𝘢𝘱𝘱𝘺 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘐 𝘤𝘰𝘶𝘭𝘥 𝘧𝘪𝘯𝘥 𝘴𝘰𝘮𝘦𝘰𝘯𝘦 𝘭𝘪𝘬𝘦 𝘺𝘰𝘶.."

Xingqiu:

Like Albedo, he always spent most of his time at a certain place, for him..the place is the library

So... you obviously met him there

He was looking for a book that he wants to read since the last couple of months

The book was actually rare that not many people knew or read it..so he's looking for it

You actually borrowed the book from the library and you wanted to returned it

He currently asking the librarian when you suddenly walk to the counter and returned it

"I heard that you want to borrow this book?" you asked

"Oh..yes, I've been wanting to read it for sometime now" he answered

"It's quite rare that people actually read this book though and yet it actually caught your attention" he added

You nodded and smile at him "Yes actually, I was reading a few pages and then I was so in to the book, i have to borrow it"

You both laughed as you leave the library

"My name is Xingqiu btw, may I ask yours?" he asked

"I'm y/n, nice to meet you Xingqiu"

There, you two talked for archons know for how long

You two sometimes switched books from your collections or maybe go out and find some interesting books

Other than reading, Xingqiu enjoys going on adventures with you

Seeing the nature around him makes him feel lighter

He really loves to read books though, but he tries to make you comfortable as much as possible around him

Maybe he'll try to take you out on a stroll around Liyue Harbor or maybe eat at Wanmin Restaurant, depending your mood

Sometimes you guys planning to pull another prank on Chongyun LMAO

He wants to make sure that you're comfortable around him and feel happy around him

All in all, he wants to see you enjoyed his company

"𝘏𝘦𝘺, 𝘸𝘢𝘯𝘯𝘢 𝘨𝘰 𝘦𝘢𝘵 𝘢𝘵 𝘟𝘪𝘢𝘯𝘨𝘭𝘪𝘯𝘨'𝘴 𝘱𝘭𝘢𝘤𝘦? 𝘐 𝘩𝘦𝘢𝘳𝘥 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘳𝘦'𝘴 𝘢 𝘴𝘱𝘦𝘤𝘪𝘢𝘭 𝘮𝘦𝘯𝘶 𝘵𝘰𝘥𝘢𝘺, 𝘐'𝘭𝘭 𝘵𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘵 𝘺𝘰𝘶.. 𝘮𝘢𝘺𝘣𝘦 𝘢𝘧𝘵𝘦𝘳 𝘦𝘢𝘵𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘸𝘦 𝘤𝘰𝘶𝘭𝘥 𝘨𝘰 𝘰𝘶𝘵 𝘯𝘦𝘢𝘳 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘩𝘢𝘳𝘣𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘰𝘳 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘣𝘰𝘰𝘬 𝘴𝘵𝘰𝘳𝘦..𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘤𝘩𝘰𝘪𝘤𝘦"

Venti:

You met him at The Windblume Festival

It was your first windblume, so you're still confused about the traditions that happening around

He was in front of the Cathedral finding students for his poetry class

When he saw you, he waved at you and you approached him

"Hey there! New to the festival?" he asked

"Oh yes, I've lived in the city for awhile but i never experienced this festival before.." you answered

"Ehe, allow me to explain it. The Windblume Festival is a Festival in Mondstadt celebrating the thousand winds. Usually, the people of Mondstadt offers windblume to the anemo archon and to their special loved ones" he explains

"The people actually have to take their matters into their own hands, so they don't really have anything to get helped with" he added

"Is that why when I asked if anyone needs help, they say they don't need one?" you asked again

"Hehe, that's right" he says, "Oh, I haven't introduced my self haven't I? ehe, my name is Venti, the most popular bard in town!" he adds

"Your that bard, I've heard great things about you, my name is y/n, I'm just a regular adventurer.." you replied

He shrugged and acts a little nervous when you said that

"So uh.. want me to take you around town and see what people are doing?" he offered

"Sure, that would be nice.." you said

With that you two took a stroll around the town

Seeing people prepare gifts for their loved ones, the atmosphere feels so wholesome

You guys even took a little trip to Windrise, and he even play you a tune or two

You really enjoyed his company and he’s enjoying it too

During the festival, you guys grew closer together, and maybe you guys would perform together in front of the Cathedral

You were really happy that you have someone to enjoy the festival with

Even Venti feels a lot of joy hanging out with you

He wonders that he could be with you for a long time..

Well, whatever he is feeling, he wants to grow more closer to you :3

"𝘠𝘰𝘶 𝘬𝘯𝘰𝘸.. 𝘪 𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘭𝘭𝘺 𝘦𝘯𝘫𝘰𝘺𝘦𝘥 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘺𝘦𝘢𝘳'𝘴 𝘧𝘦𝘴𝘵𝘪𝘷𝘢𝘭 𝘸𝘪𝘵𝘩 𝘺𝘰𝘶, 𝘪 𝘶𝘴𝘶𝘢𝘭𝘭𝘺 𝘴𝘱𝘦𝘯𝘵 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘧𝘦𝘴𝘵𝘪𝘷𝘢𝘭 𝘴𝘵𝘳𝘰𝘭𝘭𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘢𝘳𝘰𝘶𝘯𝘥 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘤𝘪𝘵𝘺 𝘢𝘭𝘰𝘯𝘦..𝘣𝘶𝘵 𝘯𝘰𝘸 𝘺𝘰𝘶'𝘳𝘦 𝘩𝘦𝘳𝘦 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘯𝘬 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘧𝘰𝘳 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵. 𝘞𝘢𝘯𝘯𝘢 𝘩𝘦𝘢𝘥 𝘵𝘰 𝘚𝘵𝘢𝘳𝘴𝘯𝘢𝘵𝘤𝘩 𝘊𝘭𝘪𝘧𝘧 𝘵𝘰 𝘸𝘢𝘵𝘤𝘩 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘴𝘶𝘯𝘳𝘪𝘴𝘦? 𝘦𝘩𝘦"

Razor:

Bless this wolf boy :")

You two met at his habitat, Wolvendom

You were currently adventuring at that place

When you're peacefully strolling around the place, you saw a bunch of wolves dead..

So you rushed to see where it was coming from

There, you saw a boy fighting against an abyss mage, boi... that thing really do like to cause trouble

The boy looked really angry despite the mage killed his wolf packs

You determined to help him and so you did..

After you two defeated the mage..he turned to look at you, "thank you... lupical, dead.." he said

This baby almost cried because he couldn't save all of them, only a few of them that are safe..

"I tried to protect them...but I failed...", he said in a sad tone

You looked at him sympathetically, "aww..it's alright..you tried your best, it's not your fault.." you said to him

He looked really sad and disappointed, but at the same time he felt kinda relieved that someone was there to help him

"Why did you come here..?" he asked, "Oh, I was just adventuring and then I suddenly found you..." you said

"My name is y/n.." you added, "I'm Razor"

"Do you come from here Razor?" you asked again, "yes..I was raised by wolves, Razor has no human family" he said

You were shocked that there's actually someone who is raised by wolves

"I see..." you said, "I think some of your wolf friends got hurt..may i help?" you offered him

Razor nodded and help you as much as he could

"There, that should do it.. they can't move that much for awhile, but they'll be alright.." you said to him

Razor was very grateful that he could find you, maybe he would be doomed if you hadn't come..

"You're strong...can Razor learn from you..?" he asked shyly :")

"Of course, I would be happy to teach you" you say

Razor smiled a little, he wanted to learn from you so that he could protect his lupical if something bad like this would happen

The next day, you came back to Wolvendom and train him

He picked up the lesson pretty quickly, and he now learnt how to use his Vision

You even teach the boy how to write and read loll v:

You came to Wolvendom couple of times, and besides train him, you helped him hunt some meats to eat

You never really force him to come and live at the city, but if he wants to visit it once or twice..you bring him there

Razor is really happy now that he learned new things from you and also has a friend that helped him..

Sometimes he wonders if he could protect you from danger too

He just didn't want to lose you like he loses his other wolf friends

Razor silently swore to him self that he will protect you from any danger that you encounter

Overall, you guys cared about each other and wanted to protect one and other, he just wishes that you'll be saver around him <3

"𝘛𝘩𝘢𝘯𝘬 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘧𝘰𝘳 𝘩𝘦𝘭𝘱𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘙𝘢𝘻𝘰𝘳... 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘸𝘰𝘭𝘷𝘦𝘴 𝘢𝘳𝘦 𝘴𝘢𝘷𝘦 𝘯𝘰𝘸 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘺'𝘳𝘦 𝘷𝘦𝘳𝘺 𝘩𝘢𝘱𝘱𝘺. 𝘈𝘯𝘥 𝘢𝘭𝘴𝘰..𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘯𝘬 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘧𝘰𝘳 𝘵𝘦𝘢𝘤𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘮𝘦 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘣𝘦 𝘮𝘺 𝘧𝘳𝘪𝘦𝘯𝘥, 𝘥𝘰𝘯'𝘵 𝘧𝘰𝘳𝘨𝘦𝘵 𝘵𝘰 𝘷𝘪𝘴𝘪𝘵 𝘩𝘦𝘳𝘦 𝘢𝘨𝘢𝘪𝘯..."

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(A/N: AHHH this is not like I wanted in my head...I hope you liked it, leave me some suggestions what I should write next, I still have some couple of ideas, but requests are open...so yeah ANYWAYS- thank you and good day :D)

Here are the rules if you wanted to request