#idk what the convo was that led to this but this might happen

[valsnotgothstuff]

david: so *throws his arm around your shoulder* y/n-

y/n: david, i'm gonna stop you right there. first of all, your breath smells like an old-lady fart passing through an onion.

y/n: secondly, i know you're trying to manipulate me-

y/n: and it's not going to work. get your hand off my shoulder because i've got a surf n*zi to burn 🔥🔥

[cephalofrog]

omg project sekai JP event

full spoilers below cut

- first off: wow I underestimated this event. I didn't expect it to be *this* good. it's incredibly well-written imo.

- there are so many flashbacks to previous events. it really hammers in the feeling of everything having led up to this. samsa, mirage, bug, 2nd anni, wish/i nandesu, even a callback to the group story with the song miku sings - then finally the escape for survival quote.

- it's kinda nice that it makes the point to show that mafumum's methods don't even work for getting high grades - like on the one hand it wouldn't matter either way but on the other it's good to hammer in that her worldview is entirely illogical.

- the phone is broken when it's dropped in the empty fish tank. I did not expect checkhov's fish tank but also: it's a hobby she doesn't care for, something she only has due to the expectations of her having a hobby from other people. a reflection of her own emptiness under the expectations of her mother. of course it's what destroys her final way to contact 25ji.

- mafumum saying she's made food mafuyu likes for dinner. mafuyu doesn't like any food. the way it shows mafumum's complete ignorance of the harm she's done to mafuyu.

- the flipping back and forth between empty eyes and normal eyes during the final confrontation

- "it was a mistake, buying and giving you a computer, letting you use an instrument too!" mafumum is saying that the thing that saved mafuyu was a mistake. horrific. (not to mischaracterise - obviously she doesn't know how much it helped her - but mafuyu knows, of course.)

- cutting the ending with kanade short is a good choice imo. I think it's nice to leave it there - we can get confirmation on what happened later, for now we just leave them on that moment of comfort.

- not to get too ship-y but god kanamafu fans are winning

- the ending animation is excellent and heartbreaking.

- I saw someone say that an area convo says that she's staying with kanade? but she might also be staying in sekai? idk. no idea how things are gonna go from here.

- I think this event helped me get a solid idea of mafumum's actual motivation - I think she thinks she's wasted her own life and is projecting that insecurity onto mafuyu, judging by a couple of her lines. this makes sense to me - it explains why she acted similarly towards kanade. if it was that she wanted to control mafuyu there wouldn't really have been a reason for her to give the dig about kanade's future towards her during samsa.

- shout-out to mafumum's va (and also tanabe rui of course). the voice acting in this event is incredible.

- bad end au in which the phone fully breaks in the fishtank, miku and kaito aren't able to talk to her, and during the confrontation with her mum she gives in and fully forgets her true self, adopting the "good girl" persona for good

- might add more once I see card story translations etc.

[aroaceconfessions]

This isn't really a confession but I need to talk about it in this community. I've been labelling as asexual since autumn 2020 when I realised that other people actually DO feel sexual attraction and around half a year later I started having a huge identity crisis because I realised that I might be aromantic too (because before that I just assumed that no attraction to boys = lesbian lmao) which led to me finally embracing that label another half year later and I was super comfy with that for some time. My friends are super accepting and everything (one of them is actually ace too :)) ) but a few weeks ago I came out to my therapist and it went horrible and I can't stop thinking about this :/. I didn't even want to come out to her because I was scared that such a thing might happen but she was asking bout my career plans and I told her of my goal to study chemistry and she went like "there will be a lot of boys" and I answered "well that ain't a problem" and I don't remember exactly how the convo went on but it resulted in me coming out as aroace and having to explain those terms and she said that "nobody is asexual" and "it wouldn't make sense evolutionwise" and that I might just be scared of romantic attachment because of my social anxiety and later in the session she was talking about a potential love life for me completely ignoring what I've just told her.

I obviosly felt very shitty after this appointment (I had a German exam afterwards and we had to analyse a romantic scene from the book we've read in class lmao, just wanted to add this fun fact because it was so ironic) and ever since this day I don't feel as comfortable in my identity anymore... I can't stop thinking about wether she might be right what is bullshit of course but still idk...

Now I obviously hate to go to her and I'll probably just stop going to therapy and hope my problems will dissolve themselves because I can't talk to my parents about this because I'm not out to them and I'm scared that they would react similarly :/

[melrosing]

Anon from yesterday 👋. Sorry irl stuff got in the way. I'm not super well versed in your content but so far I do think you talk about her in a way that isn't "Cersei is an evil bitch just because" and i deff said as much in my first ask. I also fully understand the internalized misogyny in a mother not liking her daughters as much as her sons and that's where you were going with for Joanna. What I noticed when i saw your AU was that BOTH Joanna (her thoughts/feelings) and the AU itself (themes etc) are more outwardly negative and less symphatetic towards her than the others.

And IT'S SO HARD FOR ME TO EXPLAIN THIS VIA ASK BOX but i am basically going to reemphasize what I said before and also say that i think there is a bias for imagining AUs that put cersei in a more negative (and less…idk kinder? gentler? considerate?) light than her brothers whether it's one dimensional or complex and I noticed that in your AU as well, as if she was always doomed to have a dark cloud over her head while her brothers got even a tiny bit of shine and light. I can provide examples if you wish to continue the convo. Anyways I don't mean to overstay my welcome so i'll just leave this as a case of us having very similar ideals but different ways of interpreting them. And btw that other anon was dead ass wrong about what they said about me. Like I promise I don't see her as a sweet angel victim and ignore how ugly and fucked up she is (esp the book version). I am genuinely SO sorry this ask got as long as it did.

no worries, I'm happy to discuss! but honestly, I'm kind of at a loss with what choices I made in this particular AU led you to ask whether I even liked Cersei as a character.

the whole thing (at least where concerns Jaime and Cersei) is based on the conjecture of what might happen to the relationships between the twins and their mother if she had gone ahead and shipped Cersei to Dorne - which, had Joanna survived, I think is highly likely to have happened, i.e. it was on the verge of becoming a canon event. and I think it only makes sense to conclude that Joanna and Cersei's relationship would take a semi-catastrophic hit if it did. like, that is a very heavy thing to do to a seven-year-old, and Cersei has always had a keen sense of injustice and sure can harbour a grudge, so I think she'd take it especially hard.

then of course the misogynistic motherhood is just something that I thought made Joanna's relationship with both Jaime and Cersei more interesting, because it means she can't truly see either of them clearly. in my mind it just makes sense for a Lannister, certainly for the wife of Tywin, and what we know of Joanna makes me feel she had some level of reverence of patriarchal structures. so, threw that in.

and also tbh, it's just more interesting to me than the notion that all the dead ladies of asoiaf would've been these girlboss mums teaching their girls to be lovely ladies or feisty villainesses, like it's just.... so boring to me lmao. like one thing with Catelyn (who I do adore) is that I kind of wish GRRM would go harder on her relationship with Arya. sounds like there's some tension there, old man. well, bust it open!!

so there's my reasoning: I picture Joanna as a deeply flawed mother who, in a moment of both protectiveness and prejudice against her daughter effectively exiles a seven-year-old who won't forgive her for it, and everything else spins from there.

and I guess I just feel like we're splitting hairs a bit here because I don't think I've produced anything that much happier in the AU for Jaime or Tyrion?? like I said of Jaime that he essentially has a distant relationship w his mother for the rest of her life, gets hitched to Lysa in an entirely loveless marriage, and lives probably a quite unfulfilling adulthood. Tyrion in the meantime.... I mean basically all I've given Tyrion is a different kind of abusive relationship with a parent lmao, and a life of isolation and toxic companionship. again, I think it'd be boring to have Joanna purely adore Tyrion or utterly despise him, so why not both.

and idk. I don't think either of the above is me gifting the Lannister boys something I'm refusing Cersei? like sure you could take it that way, but I suppose I'm just surprised that this disparity has struck you so much so that you think I must dislike Cersei to have even written it. you're welcome to provide examples if you like, bc honestly I figured it must be something substantially more than this AU that led you to send me the message - which is why I asked if you had some familiarity with the rest of my Cers posts, I assumed you must've read more than just this AU to make you ask that??

[shoobydoowapandscoobysnacks]

It’s been a while since I’ve shared some thoughts, so let’s do it. Last Saturday has been on my mind for a bit now so I’d like to write about it. It was cool, my boyfriend and I went to this dive bar we went to one time before. It was cool the first time, there was this bartender that was like the perfect balance of social and a little awkward. She made a lot of convo the first time we went there and then made a really pretty free shot for us that day too. And the drinks we ordered were STRRROOONG lol. But anyways yeah we went there again after maybe a month and she was there and welcomed us in again. Me and Zach saw the tequila selection and saw it was a little minuscule but said fuck it and went for patron. She said she’d give it to us for the price of the cheaper tequila and we were already just like “oh shit that was nice” and then he was hungry so he got food and I just got a marg and he got a corona too. We then noticed she didn’t even put it on our bill so we got shots for free. Literally hella nice! We all made convo for a good amount of time. Started talking about movies and stuff we’d recommend and it was cool.

I noticed that she made my drink and got his but had these shot glasses upside down next to both me and Zach. I didn’t want to sound dumb so I didn’t say anything about it at first but then I finished my very strong marg lol and asked Zach if he knew what it meant bc I’m not as much of a bar girlie lol. He said he didn’t know and that I should ask her. So I did I was like “hey this might be a dumb question but what do the upside down shot glasses mean?” And she said “it means you guys have another drink lined up” homegirl gave us a drink for free now too be we didn’t preorder those ones. So we literally only payed for one marg and one corona. It was just super nice. I know it sounds just like a quick little thing of “wow she’s really nice I’m gonna tip her well and enjoy and move on from that night” and of course we did tip her well💅🏼💅🏼💅🏼 haha. But yeah I think the thoughts just stuck in my head

Like someone just being nice. It made me feel like I existed. Idk how to phrase this right but I feel a little nonexistent outside of my close circle. Like I don’t say any of this in a “feel bad for me” “pity me” kind of way, just more so outside people are very straight forward w me. Take like, me going to Starbucks. It’s very straight to the point, I ask if I could get something, they say yes, and I pay and we both say “have a good one” it’s never like people ask me questions. That’s another example, like take my coworkers for example. It’s actually become this running joke at work that I ask everyone a bunch of questions and get coworkers to tell me their whole lives and they don’t know literally anything about me lol. Lol I don’t ask them to snoop or anything I just like knowing background/ knowing how I should talk to them in future work situations/ also bc it makes the time go by faster. And so it’s not like I consider myself closed off, I just don’t tell people information about me unless they ask. And they don’t. And so once again I’m not asking people to. I gave all my reasons to why I ask people questions but I do recognize people don’t ask much about me. And I don’t feel down about it or anything. More so just neutral. But I will say it did feel cool that that bar tender was nice and asking Zach and I about ourselves and then gave us some freebies. It’s just not something I’m used to and just felt nice.

Another subject that’s been on my mind I think the past two months is just this weird thing that’s happening w my boyfriend. The beginning of my boyfriend and I being together, he was underweight. Was for most of his life and then he went through a bad situation that stressed him out more and led to him being even more underweight. He had a nutritionist and then maybe two months after we got together he no longer needed one bc he was eating good and at a healthy weight. Both him and I definitely gained some relationship weight and ayo I’m not hating on it. It means we’re happy. Weight fluctuates and sometimes I personally can get self conscious about it but it’s life, it’s all just fucking bags of flesh carrying our beings, but I digress. Anyways I remember him saying maybe three months ago his coworkers have been bringing up that he’s gained weight. “Has a belly now” and he was pretty light hearted about it. He said to me, “yeah I’m eating and also I’m getting close to 30, metabolism changes lol, but I think I am going to start exercising again. “Which I think, great reaction to that. I’ve never been on the other spectrum of being underweight, but I assumed at first hearing “you’ve gained some weight, you look good” to him would be nice to hear? But then that weird belly comment made me feel a way. I kept it to myself bc I’m not projecting my own insecurities onto him. But I heard it a lot more often from his coworkers. It’ll be like him and I are on the phone together and you’ll hear one coworker he hasn’t seen in a while be like “dang *bfs last name* you gained a couple lbz “ or “your face is looking fuller” and all these comments are said in this “light hearted” condescending tone. It continued to bug me tbh, bc Zach would just be like “haha you’re right” and idk it’s just weird for people to say. One instance got me really upset though, I went to chilis w him and one of his coworkers. And you could tell their work relationship is that she picks on him. But that hangout where we were maybe there hour and a half to two hours. She was ripping him to shreds about his weight. It made me actually upset. He laughed it all off and I didn’t feel comfortable commenting bc I don’t know their relationship like they both do. But it made me physically uncomfortable how much she was talking about his weight. The hangout ended and the first thing he said to me was “jesus Christ, she went in on me today” and I was like “yeaaaah…. Those were all super weird comments to make. I wasn’t a fan, I just didn’t know if you guys always talked that way w each other.” And he was like “yeah that’s the norm.”

It just it made me so mad that people are talking like that w him. It got brought up again a few days ago when he was getting through his gate while we were on the phone and one of his coworkers said “looks like you gained some happy weight” and Zach was just like “haha don’t say that “ and he left the gate and I just said everything. Why the fuck are his coworkers SO weird. He’s in the military and I know that involves being physically fit and I’m sure there’s a fair share of eating disorders in that place bc of it, it’s just really disturbing how much people have said things to him about it. Like I thought the whole commenting on weight was something our aunts and uncles did and would die out in that generation. Not continue onto people our age. I thought people knew better. Idk if he’s getting more comments bc people think they could say it bc he’s been skinny his whole life compared to someone who’s always been bigger you assume you shouldn’t say that to them. I just hate how comfortable people feel to comment on is weight. It makes me mad for him. He’s definitely not a person who gives a shit about what people say (genuinely one of the reasons why I think he was meant to be in my life, so I could be better at that) but it makes me upset people say these things to him. Like why not just be a normal person and make small talk? Why talk about the way you’re perceiving someone physically.

He’s so fucking cute and I love him so much. I just want him to be treated respectfully and I don’t want him to eventually be self conscious bc people feel entitled to making these weird and rude ass comments

Those two things have been on my mind heavy though. Just needed to blurt it out. I know it’s going into the void of tumblr but it was nice to get these thoughts out

[sotvrna]

re the ship post i wanna know your bumbleby Thoughts™

Ship It

What made you ship it? if we're talking a Moment it was definitely burning the candle, that whole convo and mini arc with them had me in a grip when i first watched and led me into already shipping them when The Thing during volume 3 happened. but if we're being more general here about Vibes it's just. it's about the slow burn. it's about two deep and nuanced characters with their own traumas finding in each other something they've been looking for. it's about soulmates that are not found but forged. it's about love not just as devotion but as partnership. they make my brain go brrrrrr

What are your favorite things about the ship? i might have spoiled this in the previous one hmmm but other than those i'd say their banter and dynamic in general is just top tier, plus partners who fight together with compatible martial styles is just a sexy trope. and they are very aesthetically complimentary in a way that's great :D

Is there an unpopular opinion you have on your ship? idk if this would count as unpopular, but To Me they're 100% t4t and i'm unwavering in this position. i'm just right and everyone who agrees with this has a huge brain.

[cloveroctobers]

• JENIFER “JEN” MARLOWE •

IG Info/bio: @/justjenw1n | 220k followers | Fashion | just a LUVer who owns a lovely blog that you’re more than welcome to check out here... astoldbyjenmarlowe.co.uk 🪞🛍🪄

22 (24) (25 in 2021) years of age

From London, England

Her family has French origins

Tends to visit once a year mainly with her family

For her 18th bday, her parents also sent her to Paris with her bf that she’s been dating since she was 14

they broke up since he wanted to stay in Paris to pursue his dreams and she felt like she needed to be back home...which she felt Paris was not

Extremely close to her parents, some may say a little TOO close...

See, I feel like jen comes from a family that spoils her where her parents did everything and took care of everything for her. She had the privilege and didn’t have to work too hard to get things she wanted so that made her a little bit different than a few of her friends, hell—even her bf

Didn’t have to work until she reached her twenties

She also didn’t have too many friends because her parents felt like her cousins and/or her sibs were really only allowed to hold that title

However her parents had some sort of a soft spot for her when they allowed her to date her bf at 14 since he came from a nice background...

And to have at least 1-2 best friends...

I can’t decide if I see her having 3 other sibs with her being the second eldest, or her being the eldest with a younger sister? I can also see her being a only child too? Idk y’all can decide

Because her family is a tight knit one, she values everything they say and do...which is canon/evident

She got her thigh tattoo in Paris and even thought about asking her parents permission but her bf talked her out of it

she later showed them that night while he was in the shower. Her mother openly disapproved saying it was, “unladylike or unclean” while her father was more lenient towards it 

Her mother even scheduled her for laser appointments but this was one of the things jen was sure of, she loved her tattoo and she didn’t want to erase it from her body which led to her mother not speaking to her for about a month—even tho they live in the same household

I feel like she looks more like her dad with her mom’s hair and smile

Got into fashion due to her maternal grandmother who seemed to live a extravagant life as a old time actress, she always had and owned the finest of things

Jen loved having sleepovers there, it felt like she had her own personal Liz Taylor inside of her nan...but better!

Definitely found inspiration through Liz Taylor, Kate Moss, Victoria Beckham, and Naomi Campbell

she had no clue what she wanted to do in life (she never had to think too hard about it until now, it’s true what they say about your twenties) and she made the choice not to continue thru with uni & I’m not going to make her out to be the stereotypical “dumb blonde” I think she did well in school—so she kinda just chilled after it was all over

Her first job at 20 was probably working in retail where she learned all about the bs you put up with but she loved clothes! That never changed

So she decided 6 months into her job that she was going to make a fashion blog

she made one separate from her tumblr but kept it under construction since she needed to brain storm what exactly this blog would entail

It didn’t take too long to her to figure it out by how she wanted the blog to look then discussing pieces from celebs/models then slowly discussing her own wardrobe + advice

She didn’t immediately gain success for it —altho she did have a good 1k people follow her thru her tumblr where she also provided the link to her separate blog... but she worked/works hard at it, hoping one day it’ll get her somewhere and that maybe she can get paid for it too?

Retail fucking sucks and people are horrible twats so when she was approaching 21 she deff quit with her parents still hammering...more so her dad on what she needs to do with her life but she found happiness in her blog and no one was going to take that away from her —not even her parents

‘What’s the use of working if it doesn’t make you happy?’ She thinks but again! she has the privilege of living under her parents roof and not having to pay bills so she didn’t have to worry too much rn she knows they’d never kick her out right?

she has two bunnies named “bugsy” and “Lola”—u know the reference right?

I feel like she values the flinstones & jetsons because it was something her dad loved watching as a kid and still does , probably has the dvds showcased in her room that she watches when she feels sad

Seems like a smiley person but when she’s sad? It kinda sucks to see cause she turns into a whole different person and she always seems happy with a smile so wide that turns her eyes squinty

If she disagrees with something, she’s 100% giving her opinion whether you like it or not? Wrong is wrong. But when the shoe is on the other foot? She hates being wrong LOL or doesn’t view herself being wrong. Doesn’t take accountability well...at all!

She’s also showed her ass by being a gossiper and fake as hell with Allegra about mc with the whole, “let’s pretend like we’re there for her” if you’re not fucking with somebody just say that or SHOW it sis cause that snakey shit will come back to bite you in the ass (I forgot about this lol as I’m replaying)

she’s all “mega resting bitch face” until she breaks out into a large smile

Libra sun? + Virgo moon? + Gemini rising?

I feel like she only knows what she wants when it comes to relationships but not with the rest of life?

Lol she was very determined with levi in the beginning, explored shit with jake, (I can’t remember if that was after you/mc showed a interest in him or not in that route? I’m doing a talia/Rohan route rn But that’s kinda foul if she’s smiling in ur face and then boom goes and does what she wants but hey that’s the game right? Fck that tho) and then stood by Tim after only some time?

She wasn’t feeling him in the beginning either cause he thought she was too posh for him and snakey which he’s right to some degree but she’s also right if she finds him too immature for her liking

To you jim? Ten? Stans— Idk what their ship name is but it probably wouldn’t have worked out in the long run either because I don’t see both of them wanting to change themselves completely to satisfy the other. (Tim tried) Sure if you’re showing unhealthy behaviors and are open to diminishing that for yourself then trying to work on your relationship then that’s great! But they already started from the jump not liking each other’s personalities/characteristics....

And hey! Ofc I know people grow to like things they might have disliked about you in the beginning but you can also find yourself not fully accepting it in a relationship and that doesn’t mean you didn’t try

+ it’s been hinted at that they’re not endgame & if you love yourself some Tim not platonically then this works in ur favor. if not? Then you can keep them endgame by all means! For me? That endgame shit is a no! For those that don’t gaf about either of them that’s fine too lmao

YES I feel like they were both hurt over the breakup and it probably happened right around the holidays or either a couple of months after Christmas/New Years 2019

Jen is probably the type to keep checking up on her ex, not necessarily talking to them but finding out who they’re with now

and if it’s Tim with mc she’s definitely gossiping about the shit with erikah and Allegra or making shady tweets or posts on IG for sure

“5 outfits to wear when you run into your ex” type posts on her blog looool

She hopes if she runs into Tim, she’s looking her best and she would 80% go up to him & mc/his new girl if not mc and be all huggy with him and holding conversation before she even thinks to acknowledge mc/new girl and when she does it’s a shady convo with fake smiles

Absolutely loves watching housewives so she was prepared for that moment if it ever does come

Her parents openly didn’t like Tim which made him feel like shit since it seemed like jen never defended him in front of them but again, she values her parents opinion and always wants their stamp of approval that’s just the way the girl is/ was brought up

She owes them everything but deep down knows that in her relationship with Tim she could have been a little more understanding of his needs like he was with her love for her parents...but she’ll never admit that

Doesn’t get over breakups as easily as it may seem like her exes do in her opinion.

It sure didn’t take long with Tim to date mc/new girl months after they broke up! Which was like a slap in the face

The ex bf she spent time w in Paris who looks like Matthew Noszka is now engaged, lives in AMERICA—& of all places??? California to be exact, and just released his debut album!! She knows which songs are probably about her, it’s a nice album she screamed about it for hours into her pillow and cried for what felt like weeks

Lost her voice over that breakdown too

Her mother even went as far as sending a nasty letter to this ex bf’s new address...since ya know? jen’s dad is a private investigator & all!!! but dad had no knowledge of this being done

She’s still fond of Levi and jake but not like in love with them? Like she thought/felt she was with Tim but she still considers them her mates

Maybe in 2021 she’ll be open to dating again and hopes erikah and Allegra will be her wingwomen when the time comes BUT she’s focusing on her blog rn and it’s the best it’s ever been!

She had the show to thank for that now that she has a manager and is getting paid for running her blog now! That’s right this girl is officially employed!

“At least one good thing came from the show ;) 🧽🥐🥂” type of tweets

There’s never not a moment where she’s not connecting her posts whether thru ig or Twitter to her blog: astoldbyjenmarlowe.co.uk!!!

Both erikah and Allegra talk a little shit about that together...WHEN they DO talk, the pair only really socialize when jen initiates it but if one pisses the other off?? they’re going to gossip about it with the other forsure

She doesn’t look that tall to me? Taller than erikah? 5’2-5’5 the 5 is pushing it for me? Maybe? lol I’m still deciding between her and Allegra far as height and I’m too lazy to go back and see what I put for her

Hates straightening her hair, that pin straight look is not cute to her. She loves having waves and body to her hair

Get her eyebrows micro bladed since she doesn’t have much hair up there to begin with

Adores French cuisine, always has since she was a little girl. Bisque used to be her fav back then and all that she would eat

Loves spring season especially pastel colors when it comes to her wardrobe

The type to say one thing and do the complete opposite

I feel like she probably has a little bit of lisp and it’s not really noticeable until she says some words, she’s insecure about it and thought it had something to do with the structure of her teeth and begged her parents to get them fixed but it literally had nothing to do with them

Yet she still got colorful braces in middle school even tho her teeth were pretty straight. She didn’t have to wear them for a whole year, thank goodness

Went to speech therapy to help

Has stacks of fashion magazines even from the early 90s all over her room: her night stand, her vanity, her closet, underneath her bed etc...

Adores the Hadid sisters, Rosie Huntington-Whiteley, & Georgia May Jagger

Makes the best white chocolate chip (that’s right, white not just regular chocolate) banana bread but cooking/baking? Isn’t really her thing

Early riser

Loves yellow: yellow phone case, yellow laptop, yellow room, yellow tulips, yellow shades, etc...

Getting Prada shades was probably one of the best things that happened to her, s/o to her nan for granting her this wish

Words of affirmation is her love lanaguage, this girl is a talker and a bit of a thinker too I mean duh? She runs a blog

Likes bright colors on her toes but nude and clear polish on her hands?

Loves a good mascara but she also loves magnetic lashes but is trying her best to grow her lashes out rn! Thanks to erikah for sending her some good ol’ coconut oil!

Smokey eyes? Set her up

Gets a belly ring, and two more tatts one in between her boobs and the last on her ankle & that one she shed a tear over!

Maybe she’ll start changing her physical attributes more so than the way she carries her life at first? (Or ever) She’ll cut her hair below her collarbone to the top of her chest, and maybe she’ll try a light light LIGHT brunette (she loves being a natural blonde) with blonde highlights? Who knows

loves espadrilles and wedge sandals

Loves going wine tasting and visiting vineyards, if she’s vacationing? You can bet ur ass she’s looking for a vineyard to visit

Deff a lightweight

Here’s her unpopular opinions on s2: Thought Felix was a wannabe Tim and hates the fact that he follows her, thought graham was unattractive and said so to Allegra who snickered, thought marisol’s clothing choices were rather boring,

didn’t feel 100% bad for Hannah but disagrees with the way Gary and noah spoke about her + the way Gary tried to slide back over to Hannah on her comeback episode

but doesn’t feel like Lottie is wrong for choosing Gary after Hannah left

isn’t a fan of priya but is glad she’s doing fashion since jen strongly believes in if something isn’t making u happy then u need to let it go

Thinks Hope should have won and cannot tolerate Bobby. Feels he’s WORSE than Felix,

would be open to dating Ibrahim or Carl from that szn

has spoken to Harry from s3 due to his drunkenness and actually made a friend out of him? But low key wants to get to know seb? Take that info as u will 👀

Her anthem: Michelle — SUNRISE

[thestarssystem]

hello! same anon who asked the last question about being able to send an ask! i've been having questions about whether or not i could be an osdd system (1b to be specific) but i can't find answers to sone questions so i was hoping you could help me out? it's really long, sorry:(

1. the thing i have the most issues with is alters fronting. i don't exactly know how it feels to have another alter fronting and taking control of the body. there's only been a few times where i've genuinely felt like i wasn't in control of my body & felt trapped in it but other than that, whenever all my other alters(?) fronted i would still generally be able to control the body. i don't know how to explain it. for example, an alter who i think is a protector was fronting last night but besides the name and some traits, everything was pretty much still the same, like as if i was the protector? and i'm not the most knowledgeable on how osdd works, but should i be feeling atleast somewhat out of my control ?? it's happened pretty much every time an alter(?) has fronted(?) and i ended up in a really bad mood after trying to validate the possibility i might have osdd because i didn't know if this was real or if i was just being delusional. and this is kinda a silly question but when another alter fronts, thinking is still the same, right? like they can still talk in their head like a singlet would and such

2. 'voices' in your head - a lot of systems i've come across generally have the voices. i don't, atleast i don't think i do. again, i don't know how it would be if i experienced it. is it like how someone would talk to you irl? or is it more vague? or is it like, more of a feeling that you can't really 'hear' but yk it's saying that?

3. i can't exactly communicate with my alters, if i have any. i don't know how to and even then it feels really odd trying to talk to myself and again, i start to feel dumb/delusional again because osdd may not even be the case.

4. similar to the last thing, is it normal to 'talk' to your system? like last night for example, it's a blurry memory now but i remember 'we're going to bed now' 'we're gonna do this and then sleep' and such, despite the fact i know we can't really communicate. i think another alter was fronting then

4. i have trouble recognizing my alters as seperate identities and people, and rather tend to think they're pieces of me. so like, if another alter were to do something, and later i fronted, and if i would talk about what the other alter did i would still use "i did" rather than "(other alter) did". i'd just like some advice on this part

5. i have no idea whether or not systems i've met have 'different talents' but i've seen it going around a lot. to be more specific, my 'talents' or other stuff has never really changed. i usually still have social anxiety, my triggers are usually still the same, i've never suddenly gotten good at anything, and so on. is it a normal/common thing for systems for that not to happen?

6. memory. i have really bad memory, which actually led me to did/osdd (+ 8/9 year old me going "why do i feel like two people" and googling it years ago), and i always have trouble recalling what happened. after i do anything and i try to think back to it - it's just foggy. i can sometimes remember a bit of what happened, but generally i'll have to think for a bit and the visual memory of it will just be really really blurry. this happens pretty much every day but i have no idea if it does the same with important events because nothing important has really happened. and another thing - when you switch, do you still remember friends/online friends/family? i've had times where they've seemed odd(?) and somewhat unrecognizable but i've always known it's them, same with trauma and other stuff. i've always kinda known about it.

7. i've tested some things multiple times. for example, a few days or weeks ago, i was doing and typing stuff on discord in a server just for me, for fun. when i went away and checked back later, i know that it was me who did it, just not,, me, yk? like it happened with my own fingers and hands, i didn't have exact visual memories that i did it, but i had memory of doing it, so like, i knew, despite the fact another alter could've been the one doing it. same thing happened last night - now that i look back at the account i, or my alter, created, i can tell it wasn't exactly 'me', but i still had memory doing it. and it's never been like "what is this? i have zero memory of doing this" or something like that

8. i don't really have roles for my alters. well, some do. for example i think a protector (and maybe caretaker as well) was fronting last night. i just have trouble with the roles? if that makes sense. unless it comes naturally, like the protector for example, it's just kinda really hard for me to make stuff out. i also have dpdr & i dissociate and i believe that influences on how i view my identity and how i can't really make out stuff, even stuff like emotions, my opinion on something, who's fronting, etc.

9. as far as i know, systems have an 'inner world', right? i know some systems that don't, but i'm not sure if i have it and i dont know how to find out if i do

to add on, i'm kinda worried i might just be thinking i have osdd because i've been exposed(?) to it and that i might just be delusional and that i'm just making people up

lastly, would it be a good idea to try to reach out to alters? and if i should, how would i do so? thank you :D !! again, i'm really really sorry this was so long! don't stress yourself out on this please:]

- fox

DISCLAIMER: We are not trained mental health professionals! All of the information we give is coming from our own experience as a system, or from research we have done! We always recommend that, if at all possible, you speak to a therapist about OSDD/DID!

hello! thanks for you questions! i’ll do my best to answer everything haha. I’m going to section everything off in the same way you did, but there may be some overlap between questions!

1.)I’m gonna start my answer to this by saying that switching feels and looks different for every system. There is no one way to switch. What happens for us when we fully switch is the obvious dissociative feeling, and then it feels like we’re “falling” almost and then after that falling feeling, we’ve switched. With your experience you’re describing, though, it seems more like co-conscious or co-fronting. Co-conscious is typically a feeling like you’re still in full control of the body, but another alter is in the ‘passenger seat of the car’ and is giving their thoughts on what’s happening on the outside. Co-fronting is more of a feeling where you feeling like you’re half in control of your body, and another alter has half control of your body. This can be a moment (that i’ve vaguely described on my tumblr actually) of feeling like “this isn’t my hand. I’m not controlling that arm.” However, that feeling can also happen with depersonalization. To help you tell the difference, i think it could be helpful to journal when/if you get those feelings and if you “feel” different, like you could actually be another alter. —/ part b.) for my system at least, thinking is still the same, regardless of who’s fronting. I’m not sure if that’s the same for other systems, but i’ve never heard or seen anyone talking about thinking being any different, but i have heard systems discussing something i’ll address in #2

2.) so, in my experience, my system does not audibly hear each other’s voices. Some systems do, and some systems have a different form of communication. Since i can’t talk about audible voices, i’ll only talk about ‘intrusive thought’ communication, which is what we experience. For my system, we get an intrusive thought of sorts. It’s just a thought, but we can tell who it’s coming from (honestly not really sure how, it’s just a feeling. I can always tell who is telling me something) That thought is different from normal thinking though, because it doesn’t feel like it’s coming from us and it has a different... vibe?? idk i honestly can’t really think of how to explain it lmaoo. To continue my answer from part 1, alters can use something called “passive influence” which is where they ‘control’ your thoughts to get what they want. An easy example is if someone asks what you (the fronting alter) want to drink and you want to answer water, but another alter wants sprite, they can use passive influence to say that YOU want sprite, when really you don’t. That’s the only way I can really think of the act of thinking being different though haha.

3.) my system doesn’t really have the best internal communication, but that’s the case for a lot of systems, especially new ones. It takes time and determination. One of the ways i’ve seen suggested to help with internal communication is before you go to sleep, when you’re in the calm and peaceful state, just ask into your head if anyone is there and wants to talk to you. Let them knower they’re safe and that you want to talk. Keep the convo friendly and ask them about themselves (i.e their name, age, role {if they have one}, favorite color, etc)

4.) to be completely honest, it’ll just take practice to change your habit of using “i did.” I don’t know how old you are, but you went your entire life up until this point believing you were a singlet. Using “i did” is still natural for you to use as a default. Try to catch yourself as (or after) you say “i did” and try to correct yourself and overtime that habit will hopefully be broken. The same goes for not really recognizing your alters. You went your whole life thinking everything was just ‘you’ (the host) so now, when discussing OSDD, it might be hard to really pinpoint who is who. That’ll just take time though. But don’t force your alters to fit a specific mold you made for them. Everything with figure itself out eventually

5.) what you described (with different talents and different mental health issues) doesn’t happen to my system and i believe it doesn’t happen to a good portion of systems, especially OSDD systems. The only thing that really changes for my system from alter to alter is preferences, such as food, instruments (my system knows how to play 8 instruments and each alter prefers one over the other lmao), and hobbies (like reading, painting, and writing) HOWEVER, we all still can paint and play all 8 of our instruments with the same skill. Our skill level doesn’t change between alter, just our desire to do that activity (if that makes any sense lmao)

6.) problems with memory and forgetting things is not a sign of OSDD-1b. Dissociative amnesia is only a sign of OSDD-1a and DID. I think it might be helpful to keep track of your switches and see if your memory “fog” overlaps with it. If yes, then you should probably consider check out OSDD-1a or DID. If it doesn’t, my honest suggestion is to consider talking to a doctor/therapist about memory problems and short term memory loss. (also to answer your question asking if we remember online friends: yes, we always remember other people, regardless of who’s fronting)

7.) this relates back to the memory question. OSDD-1b is not characterized by forgetfulness or memory problems. With OSDD-1b, you will never have that moment of “I don’t remember doing this” unless there is a VERY specific reason (i.e. a traumatic event that needs to be hidden) It is normal, on the other hand, to know that another alter did something, rather than you, and still have memory of it.

8.) i think roles are difficult for a lot of systems. I know my system had (and still has) a little bit of trouble with roles. My biggest advice is actually something i’m following rn and that’s to not force roles. Let alters naturally choose their roles. It may take a really long time though, but that’s okay. It might help to do some research as well. Google all the different alter types and see if you can pinpoint some that fit your system (like i said though, don’t forget those roles! let them have the ultimate decision)

9.) My system doesn’t have an inner world. We have something called Aphantasia which makes it impossible to see images in our head. There are systems who don’t have an inner world, however i don’t know if there is a specific reason or not. Ive heard that meditating can help you access the inner world, as well as, once again, trying to access it before you fall asleep. However, because I can’t have an inner world, i haven’t done much research on the topic and I suggest that you try and find a method that works for you :)

closing points: When considering any type of mental health problem/ mental disorder, make sure you’re not bending the diagnostic criteria to fit you. With OSDD, there are slight differences between every system, but nothing major that would require serious bending of the criteria. At the very end, you asked if you should try and reach out to your alters. You DEFINITELY should. They’re scared and confused, just like you. I think my answer for 3.) gives a good, easy starting point for alter communication c:

I hope these answers helped, at least a little. Good luck and stay safe xx

-the stars system (written by multiple alters all at different times)

~sorry if there’s any typos~

[krokonoko]

Lol, I wanted to grab and shake him when he patted Enji's back and led him away from the civilian mob because that was too much E-simping for me and he didn't even say anything that time. Oh but I think he was actually replying to Enji saying there was "no real progress" since the only good thing that happened was Deku being back at U.A while everything they did was just "roundabout" drawing things out, beating around the bush until they ended right back at U.A again for that one moment.

"(Continued) Hawks disagrees because he does see progress. It's their connectivity. He's always watching people, and its no secret everyone in hero society is divided. (Villains were the only close-knit ones.) But that's changing. Class 1A connected to Deku, Ochaco connected the civilians to him, and now everyone is starting to come together and understand they're all just humans and to help each other. It might seem annoying but Hori decided long ago "connecting" was important for the final.

(Continued) That makes it less of an Enji simp moment and more of Hori waving flags for a checkpoint about us getting closer to the end. Lol and idk if this is just me, but their convo sounds like its reflecting fandom discourse on what good this arc was, lotta complaints. People said it was good for showing how the Class grew and mandatory protag angst, and that Deku wasn't alone. It's as if Hori's using Hawks as a mouthpiece to justify why he wrote this arc with its peculiar choices/pacing."

huh. yeah. I was kinda superficially riffing with that post, not trying to make a serious statement or anything. I usually tag posts where I'm engaging with a text in earnest as meta. maybe I should start tagging posts where I don't as shitpost lol

in any case, yeah, you're right about everything that Horikoshi was tryin to say through Hawks there. and people who claim that the arc was boring/annoying/pointless are of course wrong. it had a lot of fantastic and necessary development for p much all the characters involved, their relationships, as well as the worldbuilding. honestly, it was one of my favs so far, so I really wasn't trying to rag on it.

(the only thing I'd disagree with about what you said is that the villains are more close-knit as opposed to the rest of society? cause these guys keep offing each other every chance they get lmao)

[brightokyolights]

i read your reply about the clip with dani, im not muslim but didnt you feel they were going way to fast? i understand maybe she wanted to scare him, but i couldn't help but cringe with some lines like 'when WE get married', i dont know i understand they know each other since kids but we dont see that, its hard for me to root for them when i havent see anything but him being islamophobic and kissing her best friend days ago, also i dont think the actor has the range

Honestly i think this is where personal opinion comes into play.

(I apologise in advance because I feel myself going on a whole speil about this so this is your warning sbhshd)

Something I forgot that I wanted to talk about was that all this stuff that Amira says doesn't necessarily have to directly do with Islam. That is Amira's take (and it isn't incorrect) but I think people need to also understand that there's probably loads of people of different religions who feel that way and people who aren't religious who'll feel that way.

For me when I tried once to explain to a white person why 'dating' might not be the norm for a lot of Muslims I gave my point of view of it. Where I basically said that some Muslims don't date at all because they want to be married before they do anything (which is FINE!) and some people only go out with someone if its going to be serious and they are both in the mindset that the endgame is to eventually get married. I'm not the most religiously well read person in the world so I can't exactly explain all the nuances of all this but hopefully I can give a general idea. (my days what a fucking tangent, back into my point!) so basically! When I said this to this white non religious person she replied to me like "isn't that just everyone though? Why would you wanna go out with someone if you couldn't see yourself getting married to them?"

So I guess what I'm trying to say here is that I feel it might have felt a bit much but if you're going to get into a relationship with someone don't you want to lay everything on the table? They're both very different people and I feel like if they don't have clear and open communication it can be very easy for slip ups to happen. Maybe amira saying 'when we get married' might feel ott but like said earlier... Isn't that really the end goal of any relationship? Unless you genuinely are just wanting a mess about or something idk. But like realistically I feel if you're getting together with someone no matter who you are, you probably imagine yourself together with them in the future no? Otherwise why waste time?

I feel like I've structured this response very badly shhshdbdbhd I think thats all I have to say on it, hopefully I've made some sort of sense 😂 basically the convo /maybe/ could have been worded in a less abrupt way but everything that was said was necessary and important to Amira. Otherwise it just would've led to unnecessary conflict down the road.

Also! Totally agree with you about Dani, other than him being good looking and the best friends brother trope I don't really see any appeal to him at all. Also... Idk how I feel about the whole age thing because while we don't have confirmation we know amiras in school and he's left it for at least a year 😬 anyways! The racist comment and him kissing Eva are also humungous no nos for me too. Id like for them to maybe talk at LEAST about the racist comment but I'm not holding out for it tbh

At this point I'm just rolling with the punches or whatever the phrase is, we'll have to see if they can salvage this!

[sothischickshe]

1 (Rio/Robes), 2 (Rio/Dean), and 3 (Annie/Mick) for the X/Y ask 😂😂

Amazing!

how does Rio feel about robes?

I mean old seventeen-layers-buttoned-up-to-the-chin probably thinks they’re FAR too revealing, but I firmly believe seeing Beth in hers sparked an inextinguishable envy which has led to him (incorrectly) believing that Beth’s robes would look better on him.

Rio is going to a party. why would he bring Dean?

bc there’ll be chardonnay there

what do Annie and Mick do when they hang out?

tbh if they were hanging out at this point in canon i think it’d be pretty awks, I mean to annie this is the dude who shot lucy in front of them, and who’s associated with the person that she (SHE! who was uncomfortable with the idea of boomer dying!!) has developed a pro-murder agenda over. 

so if they were forced to hang out (LET US SAY FOR ARGUMENT’S SAKE THAT OH, IDK, BETH AND RIO HAVE GONE MISSING?? AND AFTER ACCUSING EACH OTHER, ANNIE AND MICK TEAM UP TO SOLVE THE CASE??) i think it’d just be a lot of silence. awkward for annie, don’t think mick would be too bothered though lol. and eventually annie would break and ask something weird and they’d have a bizarre convo for a few minutes, before lapsing back into silence. annie might eventually warm to him though? 

send me a thing and a stuff and then something happens maybe

[mechecolomar-archive]

i replayed tlou a bit ago so im gonna share my thoughts about this 7 year old game :) it’ll be mostly criticisms (bc i clearly like the game and havent really said what i dont like about it) and what i hope nd will improve for tlou2. i’ll kinda reference footage thats already been released for tlou2, but i wont mention any spoilers

so my biggest complaint is the gameplay, controls, and maybe the layout of the weapons. 

A big thing during fights that doesnt feel as good as it should be is the movement. I really dont like the forced jog throughout the entire game. I understand it when joel is hurt or the game wants to to focus on a certain thing in the environment, but other-wise it makes it really hard to explore the map naturally. Another thing when youre actively in a fight with numerous enemies surrounding u, theres almost no way to get out of it unless you shoot the enemy, theres no dodge and the L1 to sprint out of combat usually doesnt work well. This was especially frustrating with ellie who normally dies from one hit. In TLOU2 theyre adding the ability to dodge so thats something im looking forward to and hopefully crouching as a way to dodge works better bc in tlou it felt very slow and was normally used for slow stealth in tlou. 

The ai of npcs often broke the immersion by outright running in front of enemies all the time, no matter what character it was. Nd didnt punish the player by having other enemies detect them, which im thankful for, but hopefully joel, jessie, dina, and lev are a bit better in TLOU2. Before Ellie became able to help me fight she often got outright stuck in the middle of me and an enemy. Ellie was unable to be harmed, but it led to these almost comical scenes where me and some hunter were just swinging pipes at each other but entirely missing due to ellie running in place between us and taking no damage from either of us.

The collectibles were very frustrating (due to the mobility i mentioned earlier) and the map at some points were annoying to deal with. A lot of nd’s games seem to put the hidden items in areas behind where you start, or places that are hard to get to and its really annoying when you have to jog to backtrack or even walk at some times. The underwater parts were also irritating bc of joel’s movement too. The map was usually ok, but the part where you can ride a horse was the start of naughty dog trying open world levels (for some reason??) and the first time was really annoying, especially due to ellie not having the horse follow you while you walk and you having to jog back to her. I honestly can’t see this being too much better based on what we’ve been shown. Ellie will ride a horse for at least 2 times, be in a boat, and potentially be in a car. ND also boasted that tlou2 will feature their largest area yet filled with things and thats not very comforting to me. The only thing i could see them doing to make it better is like at least having your horse follow you or letting you full on sprint, but i feel like they gave you the horse so you can traverse the area without running :/. I think nadine does follow chloe eventually in the western ghats part of tll, so it could be better in tlou2 but we’ll see.

The bricks and bottles really felt useless unless it was for a distraction. I also didnt like how they were considered as two separate items so it constantly looked like you could hold more, when it was just the opposite. I dont think you could run and throw bottles/bricks either in tlou, but i know that changes in 2. Hopefully whatever items u can throw are considered one item and it could be more than bottles/bricks.

sometimes interactions were in an area that were around enemies, so they would get ruined and i personally didnt like that. i felt like areas where you choose to sit and have a convo should be a clear indication the player is safe, this usually was the case but i had a moment ruined because some enemy heard me. you could argue that could be more natural, but i think having a clear establishment or whats going to happen where makes more sense.

I also had an issue with the detection by enemies in the game. I played on easy so its definitely the most lenient it could have been, but the detection sound seemed too short imo. I really wish the game had like a little meter like in most games? Also the detection sound seemed to blend into certain soundtracks played and was sometimes hard to discern between the two. I personally dont understand why they dont have a detection meter considering theres other hud elements on the screen but idk. Tlou2 doesnt seem to have included that and its kinda disappointing imo

The subtitles sometimes didnt show or they were different from what was actually said but this happened rarely and it wasnt that frustrating, it was just something i noticed. This goes along with the ruined interactions. Also the few times the game had a recorder instead of notes for collectibles, it would have been nice if there was a transcript of it. I’m just lazy, not deaf, but i know some people prefer text over sound.

I personally didnt like the controls on ps4, having to constantly hold L1 to move faster than a walk was annoying to me. I also wish there were more control layouts than the one provided, or that you could change it yourself. I wish just toggling/holding L3 would let you move faster, reloading could be square, R3 should be crouching, and circle should be dodging or whatever. 

I also didnt like the photomode but apparently all new ps4 games had that type of photomode? Idk if its nd that likes that version, but it’d be neat if tlou2 had one similar to hzd/gow/hellblade. I think the lost legacy had the same type so it might just be the same :/

This is nitpicking, and isnt quit dealing with the base game, but i wish the unlockable skins were a bit more diverse instead of being 5 diff colored plaid shirts for joel and references to nd or their old games for ellie. The goggles seem to be the only unique item and its still a easter egg. Idk, i just think it’d be a bit cooler if they were more unique? I dont know if the outfits would work like in uncharted 4, with skins extending to other characters like dina or abby, but it’d be cool if they were more diverse.

Its late and this is all the criticism i can think of and hopefully they improve in tlou2, but yeah everything else is good. 

[alextriestowritestuff]

Elite S3 reactions (Episode by episode/overall thoughts +SPOILERSSSS)

So I know I post writing stuff but I have *EMOTIONS* about this show and no one to share them with so please ignore this post, if you don’t watch the show/don’t care. Includes spoilers so you’ve been warned.

Ok, I’m going to go episode by episode then do my overall feelings. I’d love to know anyone’s thoughts about the show so feel free to reblog! I just watched the show in 10 hours straight but alot goes on so I might not be able to remember every single conversation in a episode. Multiple characters have a lot going on at once. For reference, I don’t speak Spanish-I watch the show with English subtitles. 

-3x1: Carla

-Pretty solid start, we pick up a couple weeks after we left off. I felt so DUCKING bad for Carla the entire season and I understood why she lied in court about accusing Polo. Malick is introduced-am I the only who doesn’t like people who are persistent in asking other people out? Like my no is a no. Don’t annoy me, this is the kind shit people pull and pressure others into a relationship. It’s not endearing to me. So I automatically didn’t like him. 

-Lu gets kicked out but can someone tell me where she lives throughout the season? I figured she lived with her mom after her dad kicked her out but at the last episode, in the airport, she says both her parents have disowned her? Where has been living? Maybe she saved up money unlike Valerio idk. 

-3x2: Samuel and Guzman

-Samu is trying to get Carla back. I didn’t dislike them as a couple last season but I knew they were using each other, so I didn’t allow myself to get too close to them. But now I ship them. I wanted them together this season. Yeray is introduced-um, I still think he’s irrelevant. I did think for a moment that he was going to hold his money over Carla’s head so she’d stay with him but he didn’t even think for one second that was why Carla was trying to get with him (because her asshole dad pimped her out ugh) . He was only helpful when it came to the contract at the end.

-Deadass, I was going to exit out if Valerio had slept with Rebe’s mom. I thought that entire scene was pretty much sexual assault and it was creepy. He needs to go to rehab lmao.

-Polo trusting Guzman again was a dumb bitch move. So here’s how I feel about Polo. V unfortunately, I love him. He’s one of my fav characters. I know he’s a killer but Idk I think it’s the actor or something because he’s so pretty (the entire cast is beautiful) that I forgive everything he does?? Also I hated Marina by the end of S1 so he did me a favor. What I wanted from Polo was to embrace the fact that he was the villain. Like the times he threatened Lu by taking away the scholarship or (tried) to threaten Samu. Those scenes I was like hell fucking yes, no more wallowing. But noo this boy wanted forgiveness. Dude. You’re cute but you still killed someone, jesus. I would be so ashamed/guilty to be hanging out with the brother of the person I killed. He played himself there big time. The tweets were interesting way of revenge and ofc Caye used that to her advantage. She’s a leech but I thought she used the fact that she had the murder weapon (as leverage for Polo to stay with her) waaay more. 

3x3: Cayetana and Valerio

-Strange couple but eh, better than incest. So in this episode, Samu makes a deal with the worst detective ever (every season, she fails to solve a case lmao) and I don’t blame him. He’d do anything to get Nano back, it’s why he tried to get Polo arrested for an entire season. It’s shitty that he did that to Rebe but I understand why. Before this season, I thought Rebe was irrelevant because she wasn’t really fleshed out but after this season, I grew to like her a lot. It hurt watching her and Samu get close because everytime she said something like ‘you’re the only good thing in my life’ I was like girl, he’s the reason why you’ve lost everything ugh. It was uncomfy and sad to watch. 

-Ander and Omar. I liked them-didn’t like what Ander did last season but he did confess and was forgiven. So Omar’s whole cheating thing came out of left field and it wasn’t! Even! Properly! Confessed! to! Ander!!!! Oof. Ander SUFFERED this season. But I’m glad the writers chose cancer over HIV because there’s so much stigma attached to that disease and the LGBT community and I’m tired of that narrative. 

3x4: Lu

-I’ve always respected the hell out of Lu. Yes, she’s been a bitch for the past 2 seasons but she was always upfront about her actions. She didn’t like you, she let you know. This was her shining season and I loved her Valentine reversal. She looked hot, she really looked out for Nadia/Ander this episode (and the entire season). She could’ve revealed the cheating but she didn’t. I feel like S1 Lu would’ve so she’s come full circle. She said NO to Guzman which was everything. Oh speaking of which, I actually like Guzman. He’s really developed as a character in terms of temper. I like that he wanted to move on from hating Polo. But when he’s with Nadia, he irritates me. 

-I don’t have Muslim parents but I have Muslim cousins. My parents are immigrants. They’re not extreme like Nadia’s but like I feel Guzman goes out of his way to make Nadia’s home life worse. He’s knows her parents are conservative but he’s strides in the store and tells them about how their daughter can’t study. Should Nadia had said something? Yes but how could she? She has responsibilities to her parents. Her 2 other siblings have been kicked out. Nadia claims that her religion is important to her but Guzman repeatedly disrespects it. I couldn’t be with someone like that. It wasn’t cute that he offered to work so Nadia could study-which we saw him do ONCE. It’s overbearing. Also Nadia just forgives him so easily, it’s like dude, do you not care? So I like Guzman-he’s actually a good friend to Ander and formerly, Polo but my god, he’s so disrespectful when it comes to Nadia.

-Also I liked the threesome, not as good as Christian/Polo/Carla but not bad.

3x5: Ander

-Best episode this season, hands down. I loved the opening song and sequence. The scene where Polo’s parents catch him with Valerio and Caye really got my gears thinking-I was like if I were a parent (don’t want kids but ya know, if I did), how would I react to that? I’d like to think that I’d be very accepting of my kid (given they’re not hurting themselves or others) in terms of sexuality, religion, etc. But I was like hmmm, being polyamorous?? Not one I would be prepared for. But if the kid is happy, I guess. That was random but those were my thoughts. 

-Rebe finding out it was Samu who sold them out hurt like a bitch. BUT MY GOD THE BLACKLIGHT REVEAL!! Ugh the best. I had to pause, I was so shook. And Malick and Omar reveal to Nadia. Jesus. I loved her reaction but it was immediately undermined by the next episode when she forgives her brother. Like I get it, they’re siblings. But she should’ve held it against him longer. Omar got 0 consequences for cheating this season-not from Ander or Nadia. Tf.

3x6: Rebeca

-Carla is on drugs. Yikes. Again, her dad was pimping her all season so I get it girl. Also anyone else think the adults are stupid in the show?? All of their parents are business people but one bad financial move, they’re on their asses and almost bankrupt? Happened with Guzman’s dad and now Carla’s. Do they not invest in other things? Idk have a savings account?

-Also Samu and Guzman being friends. Top tier content. Chef’s kiss. Full circle and character development to the max. Ngl I felt a little bit of homoerotic tones there?? Just me?? I would ship them over any other couple if they got to together for just one night. 

-Nadia sharing the scholarship with Lu. Ugh. Everything. Loved that.

-Ander lying to Omar about having an affair. Ew. I know he was trying to push Omar away but like he was the one cheating? So either call him out on that or just break up with no reason. Don’t make yourself look bad dude. Ugh but the both of them sobbing at the end of their breakup...my heart shattered. That was GREAT acting. 

-Polo saving Carla. We all liked that. 

3x7: Nadia and Omar

-FUCK Ander’s mom for expelling them. I went to private school-there’s rules in place for parents who have money so they don’t manipulate the administration. Polo’s moms needed to let their son fight his own battles. Also Ander’s mom calling Guzman to come over to talk to Ander was really strange. She just expelled him. I know he’s Ander’s best friend but idk, she just expelled him. And they don’t even talk about it at Ander’s house. Again, this is the Guzman I like-the loyal/good friend. Loved the convo between him and Ander. 

-I liked Carla’s honesty to Yeryay and that they could possibly be friends. I always knew he idealized her for standing up for him on social media so I’m glad they acknowledged that. 

-Also Lu’s comment to Nadia that she looks like a pistachio was everything. And her ‘People are watching’ line in the previous episode is great too. 

-KEVIN FUCKING MCHALE made a cameo. Hell yes. And ofc, great speech by Nadia and Lu. Polito’s last conversations really did a lot for me to symphatize with his character (He didn’t have to do much because I still liked him despite his murdering). He got his moms to face the fact that they can’t throw money at every problem and that he is a killer. This scene and the beginning scenes of the next episode is what made me at peace with his character. I knew he was going to die but like this is what he needed for some sort of redemption. 

3x8: Polo

-Not the best ending for such a good season. But the first 15 minutes which are the convos and events that led up to Polo’s death was good. I never suspected Lu for a second, I really thought Valerio (Had some decent motive-more than Nadia, less obvious people like Samu and Guzman) had done it. But when I rewatched the trailer, you see that the writers told us it was her all along. Her line about the ELITE gang being family and that she’d protect them was a clue. She had the least interaction with Polo himself throughout the season so I never had time to even suspect her. Really brilliant. 

-Them touching the murder weapon is powerful. This was the only way to end things. I figured by episode 6ish that everyone was working together based on their answers in the flashforwards. And I half laughed because no sane police force would allow the witness/potential suspects to hang out together before interrogation. At least not without police watching them. 

-I do think it’s odd that Samu asked Rebe to ask her mom to get rid of Polo because he literally betrayed her and she talks to him (although mad) despite that. OKayyy. I really thought we were going to get the Samu and Carla get-together but guess not. I feel cheated by that because they clearly wanted each other all along. 

-The endings weren’t the best. I do appreciate that Omar made the right call in the end and I’m glad Ander is in remission. Oof my gripe though was with Nadia and Omar’s parents. So Lu goes to the airport and admits hey my parents disowned me and they’re like of course, we’ll be your family. AND I WAS LIKE ‘WHAT ABOUT OMAR??’ Y’all were so willing to kick him out and they never really made amends. So like I get that Omar’s dad is trying by acknowledge that Ander is Omar’s boyfriend but I mean during Omar’s mom’s dinner, he had no right asking him about his studies. He didn’t move out. Y’all kicked him out. How do you think he’s doing, trying to find a place to sleep? Jesus. Also the mom isn’t all good. Again, if I were a mom, I don’t understand how I could live without knowing if my kid is okay since they’re not living with me. My mom is a single mom-I know there’s no man in the world, not my dad, no one that she would chose me over. If my husband kicked my kids out, no questions, the husband is going to the curb or I’m going with my kids. Idgaf. The mom should’ve stood up. It just made me so angry that they were like poor Lu, no family but they mistreated their own child. 

OKAY so overall thoughts...I thought this was a really good season. I’d say 1st was the best, then this one, and then second (Ngl I don’t remember the 2nd one too much okay). I liked that it was more angsty and more character focused then the whodunnit? part that we’re used to. The entire cast has such strong acting and I’m going to miss whoever isn’t returning for S4. I’m going to miss Polo as well goddamn. 

Best moments of the season: Lu saying/doing ANYTHING-I have feelings, bitch. Her friendship with Nadia and other characters. Carla standing up to her pimp dad. Ander being in remission (his acting was great too). All of episode 5. Kevin McHale cameo. 

Worst moments: Polo asking Guzman if he would ever be forgiven?? And I know he did end up forgiving him but like bro, just because I don’t want to harbor hate for the rest of my life, doesn’t mean I forgive you for killing my sister whatttt. Omar never confessing to Ander about the cheating. Like no consequences and his character was just demolished this season. Still don’t know where Lu lived this entire season lmao. Anything Ander’s mom did to the students ugh.

Overall, I liked this season. It felt more mature for a high school TV show. I’m not super invested into any particular ship so I don’t feel cheated like most people. It takes me a while to get into ships but once I do, I get really invested. The only ship I was really disappointed in not seeing was Carmuel because Carla went through alot this season and Samu clearly wanted to be with her. And that’s all I had to say lmao.

[smores100]

once again we’re in full agreement lol. What’s your take on s3 remakes you’ve watched? Wondering how you feel about Skam FR as it’s kind of a similar situation to me where the chemistry & beauty is there but the writing and style is iffy (overwrought &overdramatic). My favorite s3 is druck. As a wlw I had high hopes for españa but it was p slow/v desexualized—a whole discussion, but my other gay friend & I were disappointed given how remakes with guys don’t hold back in that respect.. Thoughts?

Honestly re: wtfock tho I really do wonder if they had like one good writer in the room surrounded by fools. Bc it really does feel like some group projects I’ve been in where I feel like I’m the only one who’s not a fucking fool and carry the whole thing while having to fend off bad ideas (but when the majority rules, those bad ideas/execution get put in). I wonder if that’s what happened w wtfock.

re: wtfock, lol group projects are the worst….idk what wtfock’s writing process was like, but i’d love to know it. according to their wiki there were 3 writers this season? all seem to be male, naturally. did the two other writers have good ideas but there was a main writer who overruled them and did his own thing? or maybe they’re the rl one brain cell squad, that would explain a lot :p in any case, i’m unimpressed (friday’s clips did not help with that).

as for the other part of your ask….oh damn i have so many Thoughts on that, lol. this is probably gonna get long and messy, but you asked for it!

* druck - my absolute favorite. it’s the only one i’ve watched since s1, so that definitely played a part in my emotional investment and attachment. still, there was more to it than that. it was the closest to og imo in vibe and style (it felt small, real, lowkey, quiet, natural like og, as opposed to - as you said - overwrought and overdramatic + overproduced like the others); they cast an actual trans guy to play a trans character, if you wanna talk about a skam remake doing something REVOLUTIONARY? druck is the one; i loved matteo’s and david’s characterizations, how they both had a bit of isak and even in them, and the role reversal in some scenes, made things feel fresh *and* fit their characters/story; i LOVE that teens matteo and david were played by actual teens michi and lukas!! they’ve completely ruined me for all other remakes, bc thissssss is how it’s supposed to be! thisssss is how it should look like! THEY ARE KIDDOS. and they (druck and michi/lukas) truly captured what it’s like to be young and fall in love for the first time, the awkwardness and the nervousness and stuttering and fumbling around, the softness and pureness and innocence of it all!!! also they have THE BEST dynamic - other people might prefer all the hot kissing and steamy making out and the smouldering looks, but me? i just couldn’t get enough of their dumb chaotic energy, best friends who love each other deeply and are also constantly little shits to one another. gimme them pranking each other and playfighting every day! and then being soft and THE HANDS and matteo being a clingy koala basking in david’s affection :3 i also loved how for the most part they didn’t just copy/paste og’s storyline, they made some changes and knew how to make *other* changes accordingly for it to make sense and fit the story *they* were telling - for example, replacing the ‘call your gf’ scene with matteo’s panic attack/breakdown (one of my fave scenes), or their reunion at the end of ep 7 (replacing the desperate kissing + sex with a comforting and relieved yet also bittersweet and melancholic hug), or even matteo getting advice from his drug dealer instead of the school’s doctor, lol. also THE BEST BOY SQUAD, hands down. and matteo is my favorite isak bc to me he felt like his own character instead of just another isak, he was different and reletable and a constant Mood. that being said - it wasn’t perfect and it had its issues. there were a few times when i did feel they stuck too close to og scenes and it didn’t *entirely* work for me, just felt a bit off; i will forever be disappointed that they didn’t directly address and acknowledge matteo’s mental state/depression, bc there were enough signs imo to indicate that he did suffer from something. they mentioned ‘therapy’ in mia’s, alex’s and kiki’s cases, i truly thought they would with matteo as well, but alas, they dropped the ball on that one; i was extremely upset with david’s outing, but i’ve since calmed down and have managed to see it in a more positive light, tho i still have mixed feelings about it and am not fully on board with that decision, still wish it had been done differently (but at least! it wasn’t brushed off and was addressed immediately and eventually led to david having agency and yelling out his pain!!! which was good and important and cathartic); also eps 8 and 9 were pretty messy writing-wise, things either didn’t make sense or would’ve made more sense had the clips were organized differently (that random ping pong clip….?). overall tho, the good outweighed the bad, and it remains my fave

* skam france - now that’s a tricky one. the way i felt about it in the first half of the season, is different from the way i felt about it in the second half of the season, is different from the way i feel about ever since watching druck’s s3. it’s funny you should say how similar it is to wtfock for you, bc i’ve been thinking the same thing for quite some time. those neighboring countries sure have a shared flair for the dramatic! fr’s s3 was pretty much the first s3 i watched (i gif-watched half of skamit, couldn’t get into it). i wasn’t planning to (i was extremely unimpressed by the couple of s1 eps i tried watching, and same by axel’s acting in those first two seasons), but even is the loml and they got me gooood with their eliott pov trailer, which might have affected my excitement over it during the first half. back then i really enjoyed it for the most part, despite some clips being rushed or missing the point thus not fully having the required effect (their locker room scene, for example, or the ‘generalizations are bad’ convo), or how much i hated basile (a character so obviously written by a man it’s amazing), or the cheesy piano music. there were enough good things for me to focus on instead (more in a bit) that i could ignore the things i didn’t like or weren’t as good imo. however, all the positivity got sucked out of me when yann noped tf out after lucas came out to him bc WAY TO MISS THE POINT OF SKAM!!! and things went downhill after the director’s IT’S NOT DISNEYLAND IT’S FRANCE 2019 comment. i’m getting all upset just thinking about it, but to say *that*, to explain that horrendous decision bc lowkey homophobic reactions are realistic!!! only to THEN be all ‘haha jk yann isn’t homophobic! we just wanted you to *think* he was! he’s actually an awesome friend who took several days to reflect on all his past wrongdoings while his bff was at home having a nervous breakdown bc he believed his bff hated him!’ ughhhhhhhhh, miss me with that shit. great that they had yann apologizing for his past comments, but the way in which it was done was for pure shock value and angst, completely ooc for his character (all season he was all ‘tell me tell me tell me let me help let me help let me help’ only to do *that*?? nahh), and interesting how out of everyone the only black character was the only one with a negative reaction (remind you of anyone), highlighted even more during ep 7 aka the ott lucas coming out tour. then ep 8, that should have been 100% all lucas and eliott and building up to eliott’s manic episode suddenly had that weird random pov changing clip in the middle of it which truly wtf, basile was still basile, lucas thanked chloe for outing him, more scenes felt rushed, they had sex in school where people could come and go in front of huge windows in broad daylight and luckily didn’t get poisoned from licking all that paint! and i did not like the flatshare, i absolutely hated mika and lisa kicking lucas out of his room - which he pays rent for! - and manon not even trying to put up a fight, and them being like ‘roommate isn’t just a place, it’s a way of living. that’s a family, and you’re more like a cousin.’ ‘a second cousin.’ ughhhhhh and then when eliott was recovering from his depressive episode, they *still* didn’t give lucas his room back or at least let eliott stay there, he was sleeping on the couch, i’m aldjlajdafj. can’t believe i’m gonna say it, but TAKE NOTES FROM WTFOCK. tl;dr there were some good moments in the second half, but i was feeling bitter more often than not about certain things, so my enjoyment wasn’t as high as when it first started. and after watching druck, druck’s brand is definitely much more my style. plus, i was already struggling with making myself believe axel and maxence were in their teens, but after druck it’s completely impossible, so i just pretend they’re in college or something lol. all my issues with it aside, i’d still rate it higher than wtfock, bc overall the writing was better, more coherent, and made much more sense. i also liked lucas’ friendship with the girls; i loved that instead of copying the underwater kiss + 21:21 like some others have, they came up with their own thing i.e. polaris, which i thought was lovely; the lucas/manon crying in the middle of the night together in front of the tv was one of my fave scenes of the season; also love how we were introduced to eliott on the first week! and they spent time together! and specifically the piano playing scene, ohhhh; and in general elu are sweet and i reeeeally like axel and maxence and their friendship. so yeah, it had some major issues, but i’d rather have a coherent story with something done for shock value and drama ONCE than an incoherent story with several shock value moments.

* skam espana - sorry to hear you girls were disappointed! i only watched half of it, so i can only comment on what i saw. i decided to binge watch s1 and give s2 a shot when i heard they were giving cris isak’s story - it felt a bit weird to me, but it was also something different and new, and i did have an appreciation for their decision to have a wlw season (also much more revolutionary to me than showing a gay bashing), so i was intrigued and willing to try it. sadly i didn’t really vibe with s1? it’s totally a personal preference i think, maybe even a cultural thing idk, but it felt very fast and loud and hectic to me, idrk how to explain it. i was just more into the chill more lowkey vibe of druck and skamnl. but i still gave s2 a shot, and idk, it still wasn’t my cup of tea. i thought it was ok for the most part, but there were some things that bothered me - joana/cris felt underdeveloped to me? and things b/w them felt like they were moving so fast from the second they met, like jona was so intense and forward ALL THE TIME, they had like 6 almost kisses in a really short time, like shhh slow down. i remember disliking their ‘call your gf’ scene, it felt really petty and kinda mean to me? bc i felt like joana came on to cris *really* strongly and *very* frequently, so cris was more than entitled to feel hurt and betrayed when she found out joana had a bf, but then cris was kissing a dude and joana positioned herself and her bf in front of cris so she’d see them kissing too, and i just didn’t like bc seriously?? cris is valid, just apologize to her and explain?? idr much else tbh, they had some really cute and sweet scenes afterwards, i’m still against doing the underwater kiss + 21:21 so i was kinda meh about that (tho aesthetically speaking it was BEAUTIFUL, and i’m like, fiiiiine girls deserve an underwater kiss too, i’ll allow it just this once!), and that cuddling clip in ep 6 i think was sweet and the last one i watched. like i said, i was less vibing with this remake, and iirc it was going on during druck’s s3 and skamnl’s s2 - which were my faves, plus skamfr was on too i think and i was lowkey following it too, so….there was just too much all at once and something had to go, and it was skamesp. it was also around the time when panaphobia-gate happened, so *shrugs* i’m not wlw myself so your opinion on it being desexualized is probably more valid than mine? i just know when i did watch, there was a lot of kissing and making out and being cute and touchy with each other, so i thought it was ok? as i’ve mentioned before, i don’t need to see a naked butt or anything like that to *get* it lol, i thought they were lovely! but that’s just me. i will say that my faaaave part was most definitely the cris/amira friendship. they were so wonderful! one of the best skam friendships imo. i might one day go back and finish the season just for the heck of it, but they didn’t do anything major or highly offensive that made me have negative feelings towards it, it was just a personal preference + circumstances (too many remakes!) that made me be less into it and drop it before the end.

[randomnameless]

I've been straying too far from Naga's light and ended up on SF, it couldn't be as bad as redshit...

How wrong I was!

Anyways, amusing take I noticed was

"you should have been given a chance to hear Edel in the tomb and rhea refusing and turning into a dragon would have been more of an incentive to fight against her"

Which is uh... Not that wrong per se, but in what kind of an alternate reality would it have changed a thing?

Rhea willing to pause and listen to Edel would mean :

She's willing to listen to the person who (to her knowledge Flamey and the Monica gang are one and the same) :

Knows about their draconic identities (why capturing Flayn for her blood otherwise?)

Plans to use her dead sibling's hearts to turn humans into monsters

Knows their identities plus the power of their blood and hearts --> she might want to turn them into gauntlets or work with the people who turned her family into shiny weapons

Let a serial killer kill random students (until he found her niece)

Remire

Jeralt's death and the students turned into monsters just before his death

Tried to kill the professor in the forest

Right now ; ordered them all to be killed if they tried to oppose her and brought Metodey

Fought against her former classmates + Billy and tried to kill them

Is hell bent on recovering every crest stone

Not everything's right in those takes, and Rhea can only guess so much with the limited cards she has in her hands.

The simple fact that she's able to express regret when we met her in the tailtean plains shows that she has calmed down a bit - but here in chapter 11? The revelations + living right now someone barging again in her home to steal her dead brethren's powers, on top of being threatened and having some of her beloved students being threatened too?

There's no way Rhea’s going to accept anything else but Edel's immediate death.

Which is sad, because she wouldn't listen to anything, even if, per miracle, Edel suddenly decided to spill the beans - whatever those beans could be... (the Agarthians experimented on me I swore I'll destroy them but I need to kill you first because... Eww dragons? )

Which is why her overreaction is perfectly coherent - it might shock the player and might be the reason why you'd pick "no I will protect Edel" option. Not because you'd care about Edel, but because you want to know why and hoped Edel would give you answers about the crests, the beasts, why Jeralt died etc... But nope :) on a side note some SF posters felt tricked, they only wanted to know the truth but picking this choice led them to be embarked on the "Adrestia great again" train...

Otoh, thinking about the Tailtean convo, Rhea regrets having to fight Edel who's her first friend's descendant, but she doesn't go ballistic seeing her new relic - did she knew it was a fake one?

Tailtean happens after Flayn and Seteth's fight, we can't meet birdie in CF so it Rhea could have come to the worst conclusion (Indech/Macuil was turned into an axe?). Idk maybe some "who did you slaughter to make that weapon?!" thing.

Gfdi I'd die for some nabatean content any kind of content as long as gremlin's not here.

[tellmesomethinggg]

****

linking this here bc it was technically a journal? i just don’t want it on my notes anymore and if i ever (likely not to) want to re-read for whatever reason. please note that i knew people would read this so things are censored and are the basic version. also there was a switch at one point from **** to chris because i didn’t want things to be read

(for later when i got time lmao)

Matt is a piece of shit that just wants to fuck -Chloe

well fuck

here goes nothing

the plan: don’t get drunk bc i got shit to do early next morning and ill tell him tomorrow when i do get drunk. spoiler alert that didn’t work

Gaby (coles gf) came too btw

so i had a smirnoff ice and said no more than two shots after so id be buzzed but not fully drunk (i ended up having three and was very much drunk)

me jon and gaby we’re talking about guys and i mentioned something about liking a guy or some shit and gaby looks at matt and then me and confirms it with me. then she tells me that apparently when she met me and a few other friends at the beach last quarter, that she predicted the two of us would end up together and told cole this. im like wtf how and she claims she’s psychic lol

later, Matt and i are on the sack and he looks at me and goes do you like me and im thinking well fuck so i say yes and he’s like well shit sorry but (and then i forgot exactly what he said) something along the lines of it’s not mutual or it’s not the right timing (i forgot okay) and then he gets up after a bit to go to the bathroom (I’m pretty sure cole went out too) and then me gaby and Jon have a chisme session and they think that he does like me but whatever

so the guys come back and at this point i really need to pee again so matt offers to take me and we start talking and he’s all, oh im sorry if i led you on and shit and im like it’s alright ill get over it, it just might be a bit awkward for me for a bit. but then on our way back from the bathroom he asks me , do you wanna at least kiss your crush at least one time and im like uhh yeah so he kisses me and then we start talking but i forgot about what and im kinda dizzy so he says, oh let’s sit on the couches for a bit before we go back, so we do and somehow we kiss again and then start making out

and at this point im like bitch there’s no way you don’t like me like why would you do that if you didn’t

so we finally go back and it’s been some time so the rest of em are obviously curious

matt goes with cole to the bathroom again and the three of us have a chisme session otra vez and they’re like yeah he fucking likes you he’s prob just scared bc of his last relationship

cole comes back in and basically backs up their side based on his convo he just had with matt

and so it’s decided that we’ll both sleep on the sack, Jon sleeps on his bed and the other two together in coles bed

he comes back and we all “go to sleep” but I push for him to hold me like he usually does whenever we sleep together and around like 2,3 am we both start making out again and just like uhhhh

also we’re both very much drunk but of course i tend to remember things whenever ive gotten drunk, however, he did not and so now we gotta talk and figure shit out and go from there

also im not telling Emilou or Hanna yet until we figure things out so

yeah

fuck

alrighty, so after last night, ive decided to do absolutely nothing about it and decided to just let things play out the way things do. i don’t wanna say something and ruin our friendship that we have bc i trust him a lot and like hanging out with him, so, i guess the end of this note for now, unless the situation changes anytime soon

Can Tim see what I write on this?     -Chloe

Yes -Janet

Hi Tim!

-Chloe

Tim pls respond.

-Chloe

Hi Chloe! Sorry I have been busy at home LOL

He responded I’m so happy!

-Chloe

FYI im just going to add things at the top of the note so that its easiwr to see stuff when i add it bc then otherwise youd have to scroll a ton

and I’m dating shit so i know when I wrote stuff and my memory and yeahhh

FEB 15 1 pm

chillin in alp so lets get this chisme

alrighty so last night i stayed the night in pratts but it wasnt just me so calmate, it was me and jon bc long story short i was too lazy/dizzy to get up and jons roommate had her bf over. basically we both shared the bed, not a lot of physical contact but whateva

brb

anyways, there was also one point where he was watching a movie from his childhood and idk what tf it was but he was shocked that i havent seen those movies, so apparently now im gonna watch them so i told him for payback we gotta watch disney movies lmao

oh also! i fucking got back to my room and took a shower to get ready for class, and when hanna gets back from class shes all like oh you slept in HiS rOoM huh and i was like uhhh yeah and told her the truth like i was too lazy and dizzy to get up and then she didnt really say anything but uhhhh yikes

and then i mentioned this to emilou later when we were walking to class and shes like yeah idk why she did that that was weird and i was thinking like thank God she doesnt think the same as hanna bc shes also slept in his room on the bean bag a few times

FEB 14 2pm

heyyy its valentines day and guess whos still single and workinggg

so uhhh last night, around 1, both me and pratt finished our shit (hw and studying) and im wide awake so im like hey, brooklyn 99? (because i got him into the show and i love rewatching the show bc its sooo good) and hes down so we start watching in his room. were both on his bed but were sitting (for the tie being) and eventually i decide to lay down and use one of his pillows but its the flat pillow so i attempt to steal his other one, which he protests and we lowkey wrestle over it and eventually i fail ugh and i fall over in frustration and land my head on his knee and then just quit and stay there, but get this, he just deals with it and lays on top of me, like his head is on my side. granted we both also have pillows so like his pillow is in between me and him and same for me but like ughhh

and eventually i fall asleep for like an episode (?) and wake up right before 3 am, and then decide hey sleep sounds important bc i have an 8 am and so does he, so i sit up but im too lazy to get up right away so i sit and go through twitter and shit so chris just lays down with his head on my leg and i set my arm down on his chest and he falls asleep for a few minutes and then i finish going through my social media and every part of me doesnt wanna move, but im also in a position that would be uncomfortable to fall asleep in so i wake him up and then go back to my room

oh and the other thing i forgot was that for a good couple hours we were texting and joking around and yeahhh

i feel like im reading a lot into what happens but at the same time, like i doubt id be this comfortable doing shit with guys like this and idk about him, but like sometimes i wonder you know?

also, saturday night, as far as i know, its just me and him going to the basketball game bc idk who else is going (eye emoji insert here bc im on my computer lmao) so we'll see what happens

FEB 10 11am

okay soooo last night,

the plan was to get buzzed, just me and matt and watch Brooklyn 9-9 but then Anthony and emilou joined us so never mind. after a bit, Anthony leaves so he can answer a phone call and pratt offers me shot #1 and not emilou (she’s laying on the bean bag, I’m on his roommates bed chillin behind her so she can’t see what’s up)

we take two and im slightly buzzed but i think “hey lets see how much we can take before she notices” and he’s down so uhhh let’s get this

later we have to include Anthony and he’s down to see how much we can take and he just lets us continue, i get to 4 shots and he finishes the bottle so i can’t have a 5th

brb im gonna go eat with him

okay im back now...

anyways were both pretty out of it, emilou still hasnt noticed and anthony finds this all funny i assume and so do i , and eventually she finds out and then the two of them leave i guess around 2 am and the two of us are both on the bean bag and were both tired and drunk and drunk me like petting his hair and apparently holding his hand and well yeah i kinda hate drunk me bc if that wasnt obvious enough lmao :/

continuin, we basically end up cuddled together most of the night until we both kind of sober up hella early in the morning and kind of separate a bit

and so in the morning guess who brought it uppp and i at least have an excuse that i was drunk and not thinking and just kinda doing whatever drunk me wanted to do (but omggg his hair is so fucking nice to play with omg) anyways imma just die real quick bc idk what happens now

also since no one else was in the room literally no one else knows about this and i think were keeping it that way bc lets be honest if anyone found out about that i think id be screwed for secret keeping and then well yeah

FEB 8 1AM

i remembered:

sunday 2-3

i forgot this happened but before I ended up in chris’s room i was chillin upstairs watching tv and then he came out on the phone with some one and long story short he said something on the phone to his friend along the lines of “you’re gonna have me in your life for a long time” and when he was saying that i was looking at him bc soy chismosa and i was curious and he winked at me and I died

Monday 2-4

so the other thing that happened was I had lunch/dinner with him before my writing class and no recuerdo que decimos, but uhhhh yeah

i like hanging out with him

also, just got back from his room and am more convinced that he may not like me but actually just sees me as a friend but at the same time maybe he does but IDK

i hate feelings and it’d be so much easier if i didn’t have them sometimes lmaooo

FEB 7 5-7 PM

so im currently in the room rn so im gonna try to make this as chronological as possible

saturday 2-2

alrighty so mind you this is the day ive volunteered with ship and have spent the whole day there, (i dont remember why i thought this was relevant :/)

so saturday night, i go to work in his room around 8 (?) so i can work on my essay and finish my shit bc he has a bean bag thats hella comfy to work on

andd so later on, jocelyn comes in to watch anime with him and then after i finish we all decide to watch gabriel iglesias and ended up squishing together on the bean bag with me in the middle of the two of them

and so were all chillin there, laughing whatever and at one point chris fucking pratt puts his head on my shoulder for a little bit and i dIeDddd

and eventually i fall asleep when we start watching emperors new groove and mind you im fucking next to chris pratt like uhhhh my GOD

so i wake up once the movies over and then go to the bathroom and come back and by then he has taken over the whole bean bag and im sad that i cant just get back and go back to sleep so i go back to my room

(hanna doesnt know what time i get back i think and im pretty sure it was around4 am) (emilous also not here bc she went home for the weekend)

sunday 2-3

so i decide hey i was productive yesterday and decide to return to his room to work on shit and try to get as much done before work in theevening

i finish around 1/2? and then i tell him im bored and i wanna do something before work but idk what so he says lets go to the rec room and its just the two of us and its chillin and he puts me on his story playing pool lmao

and then i go to work :(

but then THEN later after work i go for a run and end up back in his room and theres a couple other people there and so were all chilling (mind you this is around midnight)

and somehow i end up falling asleep on the bean bag next to this girl jon from my hall and (this is a secret in a secret) but i hear her get up at one point and then chris pratt then joins me and during the night im tossing and turning and leaning on him a bit (ughhhh i died a shit ton)

monday 2-4

so in the morning around 720 or so i wake up pay dumb and am like oh whend you get here and he explains and then hes like yeah i dont really know the girl who slept in my bed (one of jons friends) and i figured since im more comfortable with you id just move here (!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! fuck me upppp) [please note that when i say fuck me up i dont mean that type of fuck]

alrighty thats what i remember that i havent told you, and then the other bit from the screen record was tuesday and now its thursday and here i am in guess whos room again

possibly staying the night lmao

but jons also here so its not like im staying the night staying the night