#ie the university i currently attend

[whisperprime]

Note: Archdemon from previous entries now has a name. If you get to the end of this and wonder, “Who’s Mammon?” that would be him. I’ll be editing previous entries to include the new change.

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5 | Part 6 | Part 7 | Part 8 | Part 9 | Part 10

Hob allows himself his pity party, unfair that it is to call it that. He has been through a traumatic series of experiences and he understands the necessity of allowing himself time to recover.

In so much as recovery is ever possible after nearly a century of being tortured by a literal demon.

It likely doesn't help that he can't quite decide if staying in his friend's home for any prolonged period of time is a good or bad thing for him.

Oh, he is more than aware that you don't turn away a safe haven when you need to rebuild your life from neatly the ground up.

He's also aware that being in this house when his friend who has very much never stated they are indeed friends in this timeline is going to tear his fool heart to pieces.

The first night after Dream left, Hob had made his way back to the master bedroom, listless and restless at the same time. He'd found himself staring at the bed until his eyes burned, first from not blinking, then by the first hint of tears.

He is many things over his beloved, but he has not been brought quite this low for him.

Hob had taken the clothes from the wardrobe and set up base in the guest room downstairs. The bed didn't hold a candle to the one upstairs, but his dreams were haunted enough without the reminder of whose bed he was sleeping in.

Hob begins the arduous task of rebuilding his life in stages. It has been a very long time since he had to build it up from quite this near to from scratch.

He always had his contingency plans. They all had the emergency plan built in if he needed to disappear for a hand full of decades. Most humans that might hunt him would either have long given up or died by then, not having the same gift of a long life span like him.

He could afford to be patient when all he had was time.

A hand full of decades, though, is a very different beast than a century, though. Not the worst, but hardly the best, though.

It will be more trouble than worth to come back as a relative of who he was back during World War I. Better to start off fresh. It will be good to clear up any loose threads he might have left laying around. He is only sorry for the effects that he will have lost in the process. Some of those objects he had originally managed to hold onto, even into the 22nd century.

The best thing he has going for him is that he has already lived through this time period once before. The outside world isn't going to blindside him with technical advances. If nothing, it's going to feel a bit primitive.

But that's him getting ahead of himself.

After dragging himself out of the three day old cocoon of blankets and pillows he's made for himself, Hob feels ready to tackle the next stage of his plan: figuring out where Dream's house actually is and how much travel it will take to get him to one of his caches. Most of them are in the UK, but there are a few scattered between the United States, France, and Germany, respectively. As long as he’s not too far from any of them, it shouldn’t be too hard to get to one.

He goes out to the kitchen, grabbing himself a banana to snack on as he stares at the leather pouch that had appeared on the counter the day Dream left. He had found it along with a pantry full of food to easily last a single man several weeks, even with a generous appetite. It contains a generous amount of money, more than enough for transportation and lodging, but Hob does not want to dig into it if he doesn’t have to. His cache will be more than enough to get him back on his feet while he reestablishes himself.

There is only so much he can stand to accept. The clothes on his back, the roof over his head, the food in his belly, they are more than he could have asked for. Any money that he accepts will be only what he needs to get to his cache and to carry it with him back to London.

With a grunt, he grabs a bottle of water and then the pouch, the latter of which he stuffs into the pocket of his sweater. He finds some shoes that fit him as perfectly as everything else by the door. A key ring with a key to what must be the front door is swiped from the hook it hangs off of. He is all set to go, and yet he still lingers, a hand hovering over the door knob.

He hasn’t been outside in over a century. The thought is sort of mind boggling. Oh, he’s gotten near the windows, but he hadn’t felt like opening them just yet.

And now he’s going outside. Completely of his own free will. There is nothing keeping him here beyond the general effort it takes to open a door and walk through it.

Needless to say, he stops hesitating and near throws him outside.

He pauses on the door step, breathing in the crisp air of what appears to be either a fall or spring day. Whichever it is, he has caught it on a sunny day, and he feels no shame as he tilts his head back and lets the light of it soak in.

Humans are creatures of the light. They need it to combat fatigue, boost their mood, and to strengthen the density of their bones. Although Hob does not have to worry about the last on the list, he has felt the lingering touch of what felt like an ever lasting seasonal depression.

If it didn’t feel like it was 7­°C out, he would absolutely go sunbathing about now.

He reigns in the urge, shuts the door behind him, locks it, and then makes his way down the drive way. Halfway down the driveway, he pivots to get a good look at the house. If he’s not mistaken, it appears to be a Victorian era style house. Old enough to be from that era, from the looks of it, although effort has been made to upkeep it. Hob half expected it to be predominantly black in color, but it’s blue-grey walls and dark grey roof tiles are more color than he thinks he’s ever seen from his friend.

Not by much, but still more colorful than black.

The house isn’t secluded, but it isn’t right up on top of any other properties, either. At the end of the drive way, he glances left and then right. Neither particularly look more promising than the other, so he simply shrugs and picks a direction. He makes note of the house’s location and starts walking.

It’s not a terribly long walk, but his ankle is still smarting by the time he reaches civilization. It doesn’t take long from there to figure out where his old friend dropped him and he has to laugh a little.

His friend has property in Scotland, as it turns out. Aberdeen, to be exact.

Oh, this is not nearly as terrible as he had feared. He kind of hoped he’d be closer to London - that’s still a eight hour trip one way by train - but at least he’s still in the United Kingdom.

It’s easy enough to get his hands on some luggage. Everyone is sympathetic to the story of the traveler who’s luggage has gone missing. He thinks it helps that he’s wearing what looks like high end clothing, because nothing Dream makes can be otherwise, apparently. The cashier who rings him up regales him with a time her husband had the same thing happen and how they never did see that suitcase ever again, thank goodness nothing of true value was in it.

He parts from the shop feeling better for the pleasant chat with a friendly soul. He lingers around the shops, buying some lunch and a simple pay-as-you-go phone to tide him over until he can get one with a plan. He chats with some more friendly locals and reacquaints himself with the early 21st century.

The sun is setting by the time he drags himself back to the house. While making dinner, he considers his next move. He is tempted to remain another day. To linger in the library or hide away in the guest bedroom until he is forced to leave. The offer was made that he could stay as long as he needed.

But if he stays, he will not want to leave. And what he wants most, he will not find here.

The next morning, Hob goes through it and clean the areas he's inhabited. He saves the upstairs bed - Dream’s and, for a single night, Hob’s bed - for last, pulling the sheets off, dragging them down to the washer and dyer on the first floor. He takes them back upstairs and erases the final traces of his visit as he sets the bed back to right. He laughs at himself in self-deprecation because here he is getting worked up about a bed his friend who is not his friend has likely never even laid in.

He takes a few changes of clothes for himself, packs his necessities along with the phone and pouch of money he will have to find some way to return at some point, and leaves the house, locking the door behind him. He forces himself to walk away, never once looking back no matter how much he wishes to.

By 9:52AM, he is sat on a train on a one way trip headed for London. By 11:00PM, he has found his closest cache and a room for the night.

Over the next several months, Hob pieces together who he wants to be for the next 20 years. On paper, he becomes Robert Gadsen, 31 years old. He’s just moved to London after getting his Master of Education in Teaching and Learning in the United States. He tacks on a Bachelor of Arts in History to have an excuse to get him in the door for history classes when he applies to teach at a local college for some teaching experience.

His biggest risk, he is aware, is when he purchases the building that, in another life, had been The New Inn. 

He had not been surprised when he went looking for what had become of the White Horse Tavern and had found it completely gone. In this timeline, Hob had not been there to slow down the closure of the tavern. No one had petitioned for it to be declared a historical site, which had tied the hands of the demolition team for the better part of a decade. Eventually, Hob and his team had lost, but not before delaying things long enough that The New Inn was up and running with a sign pointing from the old meeting spot to the potential new meeting spot for Dream to find.

Because he does not want to have to dig another cache too soon, he decides to move in to the building from the first day instead of living in his own flat near by. When the Inn is up and running, he might revisit the idea of moving out, but for now, he will save money where he can.

The first day after moving in, Hob sits on the floor he has just finished sweeping and simply allows the moment to sink in. 

He does not know why he is insistent on doing this. There was no indication that Dream will meet with him in 2089, as there was no indication he even came to the 1989 meeting. This could all be for nothing.

But Hob had built The New Inn the first time on nothing more than a hope and a prayer, the offering little more than an out stretched hand should Dream ever wish to take it. And perhaps it will become that again, in this new timeline.

Most of all, it had become his lode stone, after Dream’s death in the other timeline. It was the place he returned to when the loneliness of his immortality got the best of him and he needed to reflect on why he wanted this life. He hadn’t always lived there or even near it, but knowing it was there - this place where he had once been able to be honest with who he was and how he lived - was enough.

And so, the next day, he hires a contractor and got to work. Like the first time, he is just as involved with the construction and the creation of the blue prints. The contractors are a little skeptical at first, but it helps that this time, he knows what he’s doing. Remembers what worked and hadn’t worked. It saves time, even if it takes out some of the charm of the original build.

It is six months to the day of his rescue from Burgess’ henchmen that things take another turn. 

The construction of the New Inn coming along nicely, his teaching job secured and ready to begin with the fall semester. The flat above the Inn has not received quite as much love as the pub, but it is not that far behind it. He is bone tired and he is almost asleep before his head hits the pillow.

In the time since the seal broke and his ability to dream like every other person returned, Hob has revisited the basement at Fawney Rig quite frequently in his sleeping hours. He visits it nearly as often as he does not get rescued and finds his way to the bottom of the English Channel instead.

He has tried his best to keep up his ability to lucid dream, but with the Dreaming now fully able to draw him in, he finds himself able to move around his dreams as if they are mere sets rather than events he is reenacting. He hasn’t gotten the hang of changing things, but he takes what he can get.

On this night, however, he does not open his eyes to a familiar basement with Mammon standing over his naked self, unable to escape the archdemon’s wrath for the binding circle. Nor does he find moments from being from some horrific death he will not stay dead from. Nor does he find himself moments from a dip in the water.

No, on this night, he opens his eyes to what is still that familiar basement, but instead of an angry archdemon, this one has a glass and metal sphere hanging from the ceiling. A stone walkway provides a way to cross the moot that has been built to isolate and protect a circle painted in yellow under the orb. 

Hob presses his back to the metal gate behind him and stares, horrified, because this nightmare is not based on a memory that belonged to him.

It is based on a memory that belonged to the Dream of the other timeline.

Interlude

[winterchimez]

Make or Break | Ji Changmin

summary: both you and Changmin have been childhood besties for as long as you could've remembered. but when Changmin finally realised that you are more than just a friend at this point, he decided to take it a step further beyond that.

pairing: best friend Changmin x g.n!reader

genre: best friends to lovers au, fluff, some crack & humour

warnings: soft best friend ji changmin, both changmin & y/n are just clueless when it comes to romance (mostly y/n 😭)

word count: 4,713

a/n: hiya i'm finally back from summer vacation, which means it's back to writing as usual! i'm currently fulfilling the requests you guys have sent in for my 100 followers event, and this first entry is requested by my sweetest @zzoguri i'm so happy you requested this song bcs it's one of my all-time fav b-side tracks! i really hope i've managed to get the vibes you were going for ><

also a huge shoutout to my love @sungbeam for making these gradient dividers for me (which i absolutely LOVE thank you my meimei 🫶) so i'll be using them in future fics & decided to revamp the theme of my blog! 😉

without further ado, enjoy 😊

You were deep in your dreamland before you were jolted awake by a tap on your shoulder. 

As you slowly opened your eyes, you were surprised by the individual who had his face in such close proximity to yours.

“Woah Changmin-ie!!” You shrieked, surprised by the sudden visit of your co-worker right at your work desk.

Or rather, your childhood best friend. 

“Geez, Y/N. Working overtime again as usual?” He began shaking his head while starting to help you pack away your belongings into your bag. 

“Well, it’s not like I had a choice. I have to fulfill my client’s requests by the weekend.” You yawned as you began to give yourself a good stretch. 

“Y/N. You know, you can always ask me for my help. You know I’m only a few cubicles away.” 

You smiled. He was always like that, offering you help in any situation you may be in, and he always prioritises your needs before his.

“It’s fine, minnie. I’m sure you have your own responsibilities to worry about, and may I add, the few deadlines that you’ve somehow missed previously, which earned you a good scolding from your head of department, Mr Kim?”

“Now that’s just mean. I came to help you, not asking you to make fun of me.” He began to pout, which was one of your favourite sights to see and look forward to. You both have grown accustomed to each other’s small habits. Basically, you both knew each other well to the point that you could anticipate what are the small gestures or movements the other party would make in any situation possible. 

He has been there since the beginning, when he moved into your neighbourhood when you were about five years of age. In fact, it was your mother that insisted you went and made friends with him. Given your bubbly and friendly persona, of course, you were pumped and excited to have a fellow friend who was about the same age as you were since you were accustomed to the older kids in your neighbourhood. 

Changmin was too shy to even engage with you at the beginning, always hiding around the corner and refusing to mutter a word even. However, your bubbly persona did not allow him to stay put at the corners of his garden and always somehow managed to drag his ass out to all of your crazy adventures. You climbed trees, played football, and even went to pick some flowers from your neighbour's garden (for which you both got into big trouble). 

But ultimately, in the end, you both eventually became really good friends and ended up attending the same institutions throughout both middle and high school and eventually in university. And perhaps it was fate that you both ended up in the same company right after graduation as well, in the same department. 

As you both finished packing away all of your belongings and switching off the lights around the room, you both decided to head straight out to the door while beginning to decide which izakaya restaurant you both would be drinking while chatting away about the day. 

“The one down the street it is.” 

“For the love of God, did you know how rude it was for Jake to leave me just there as it was??” Your speech began to slur, which indicated you had a little bit too much to drink. But it was a weekend, and Changmin knew that there was no stopping you since you’ll be having a day off the following day anyways. 

And, of course, he would be walking you home because the last thing that he’ll do is trust your drunk ass to get yourself safely back home this late at night. 

The hour was getting late, and you were beginning to lose control ever so slightly of the amount of alcohol you were about to chug down into your system, which caused the man to step up and stop you in your tracks.

Sulking and giving your friend a frown, you began to whine like a child, but the man did not mind even in the slightest bit. In fact, he found it to be cute, in all honesty.

After paying for the meal, he decided to call for a cab to take you back to your apartment, since knowing how you’d usually be a tad bit more talkative than usual, he decided to avoid public transportation to save the embarrassment. 

When you both arrived at your front door, you could kind of vaguely make out that he was trying to tell you something important. But since you were tipsy and obviously not in the right mind, he took your phone from your bag and started typing away. It was normal for the both of you to check on each other’s phones because you were that close. Hence, you didn’t mind it at all. 

Once that was done, he brought you inside the comforts of your living space and helped you tidy yourself a bit until you were sober enough to finish off the rest on your own. 

“Okay, I’ll take my leave now, Y/N. And remember, don’t forget-”

“Yeah yeah, I know. Lock the doors before going to sleep so that the bad guys won’t come and get me. Pinky promise.” You cut the male off and made your usual pinky promise gesture as you shoved the man out to the door. 

“Nighty, Changmin-ie.” You smiled before closing the door shut. 

Changmin took a deep breath in and smiled as he looked right up into the sky. 

“It’ll be all okay, right?”

Changmin’s POV 

As Changmin unlocked the front door to his apartment, he was immediately headlock by the only one among his roommates who still does it all the time to this day. 

“Geez, Juyeon. Why would you touch the man when he’s all filthy from work.” Chanhee protested, as usual, he’ll always come up with something savage to spit at the male. 

“Cut him some slack, Chanhee. Man’s just gotten home from his little date night with we-all-know-who.” Kevin winks and smirks while he nudges Changmin to spill the tea like always. 

As he freed himself from Juyeon, he began to chuckle and rubbed the back of his neck, which everyone could tell how something was up. 

“Care to share the details with us, buddy?” Juyeon guides Changmin right to the couch in their shared living space and gathers the rest to join as well.

It took a while for Changmin to look at three of his friends while finally deciding to spill the tea. 

“I asked Y/N out.” 

The three of them were about to scream and celebrate joyfully before Changmin had to burst their bubble. 

“Without telling Y/N directly, that is.” 

Now that has gotten everyone’s full attention as they looked at Changmin as if he was drunk and didn’t know what he was actually talking about. 

“God, did you just get hit by a truck? You’re not making any sense.” 

“How on earth would you ask Y/N out in an indirect manner?” Kevin questioned, clearly not getting any of this. 

Changmin paused for a bit before bending his head down to his hands. “Well, you see... Y/N wasn’t fully sober. And I took their phone to set an alarm and reminder.”

Everyone went silent, that was until Juyeon spoke up. 

“Oh my god, I didn’t know that was the new trend these days to ask someone out.” Poor Juyeon has always been naive like that.

That caused Chanhee to slap some sense into the guy. “Of course not, man.” The male then turned his head back towards Changmin’s direction. “Why on earth would you do that?”

“Be-because!! I’m starting to think… that Y/N is beginning to mean a lot more to me. More than just friends, that is.”

The amount of ooohs that filled the room caused the male to blush and eventually hide his face in the palm of his hands. 

“Honestly though, I think that’s such a cute idea.” Kevin reassured the man.

“You really think so?” 

“I mean, imagine Y/N just waking up to a reminder saying ‘hey you have a date with the one and only ji changmin!’, cause I’d like that myself.”

“Stop feeding the man with delusions, Moon. What if Y/N wakes up in total shock? Have you ever thought about how Y/N would feel?” Chanhee questioned the male.

“Nah, I’d said you did the right thing, and you’re a man now. That fun little date is something to look forward to.” Juyeon places one of his hands on Changmin’s shoulder while giving it a slight squeeze, letting him know that it’s all okay now. 

With his friends' support that somehow calms his nerves and makes him think that maybe his idea wasn’t so crazy after all. 

“Ye-yeah! It’ll definitely turn out great tomorrow.”

Y/N’s POV

You were jolted awake by the sudden blaring alarm from your phone that was placed on the nightstand. 

You felt annoyed, yet you were questioning yourself at the same time. Knowing your personality, there was no way you would’ve set an alarm on your day off. Unless you were too drunk the night before and decided to do some questionable things that even your best friend Changmin wasn’t able to help contain.

As you turn your body to the side to reach out to your phone, you squint your eyes to try to make out the text on your phone.

A reminder? Now that was odd. You usually never use them ever, since you were more of a bullet journaling kind of person with all of your tasks and chores you had to do.

But when you finally made out the words, you immediately shot up straight from your bed as you tried your best to reread them repeatedly. 

🐿️: Let’s go out for a date this afternoon! I’ll be waiting at the cafe near 7th Avenue at 12:30pm. Don’t be late! :) 

Holy smokes. 

That was when you remembered that Changmin was trying his best to tell you something the night before, but you were too drunk, less sober enough to actually make out the words he was trying to converse to you, which was when he resorted to picking up your phone to type in some words.

You sighed and rubbed your eyebrows with your fingers. 

Of course, it was what happened then. 

Suddenly, you looked up at the clock that was situated on the right side of your room above your desk, and you realised that it was already 12pm at this point. 

Shooting out of bed, you quickly ran to your closet, digging through the entire stack of clothing you owned that you’ve yet to fold away neatly. Not to mention that your table was still a mess with all of your makeup products that you had somehow forgotten to put away the day before because you were running late to work.

As you were already short on time and desperately needed someone’s help, you quickly grabbed your phone and called the best fashionista you would know around the neighbourhood. 

“Choi Chanhee, for the love of God, please help me.”

Changmin stood patiently while having his hands inside his pockets as he waited for his so-called “date” to arrive at the set destination. 

He was wearing a casual white tee paired with a black cardigan along with some blue jeans and Converse shoes. To make himself more presentable, he even tried slicking his hair back for the first time today, which his model friend, Lee Juyeon, obviously advised him to do so. 

Constantly pacing back and forth, he tapped his fingers inside his pocket while having a tad bit of negativity right in his mind. 

What if Y/N overslept? What if Y/N never shows up? 

So many questions went on in his mind, even to the point where he thought that doing all of this in the first place was such an awful idea. 

Just as the clock was about to strike 10 minutes before 1 pm, Changmin was greeted by a loud panting sound that was coming from his left side. Sure enough, he found you running towards his direction and finally coming to a halt when you reached in front of him.  

As you tried your best to calm your fast-paced breathing down, you finally mustered up the courage by looking up to your best friend, which was where you were left stunned, and so did the male himself. 

You wore a bright lilac top that paired extremely well with a pair of navy linen trousers that you got for sale on Amazon Prime Day. You paired the outfit with a white cardigan and somehow wore matching Converse shoes with your best friend. 

What a coincidence. 

What really stood out the most for Changmin was the way you presented yourself. Sure, he has seen you in your usual makeup for the past 5 years working at the company, but this was the first for him to see you in a completely different style. Instead of going for the usual heavy work-like makeup, you went with a subtle yet sweet makeup look that you’ve recently been doing for the past couple of weeks on weekends. 

Changmin was stunned, to say the least. He was definitely in awe of your beauty.

“Umm... Changmin-ie? Is something on my face?” 

“N-no! Of course not! I mean.” Clearing his throat and turning his head off to the side to somehow hide his now-turning red-flushed face to the side, he managed to cough out the words that he’s been dying to tell you.

“You’re really beautiful.” 

The most beautiful person ever, to be exact. 

Now it was your turn to feel the heat rising up to your cheeks, and you quickly placed one of your palms to quickly hide them from your friend. 

“Th-thank you.” 

As you both stood there for a few seconds in awkwardness, Changmin finally decided to break off the tension and gestures for the both of you to start walking down the streets and head to your next destination. 

During the entire time, you noticed how Changmin seemingly tried to keep a distance from you, way more than he usually does. You thought it was odd since he usually walked pretty close to you without feeling any sort of awkward feelings in between. But, it was clear that something was going on between the both of you today, and neither of you could really pinpoint what it was, quite frankly. 

As you both reached the cafe that Changmin chose, he quickly found a table situated right by the windows near the end of the cafe and reassured you that he’d be back with some mouthwatering pastries and desserts while you sat and waited. 

You were about to protest since you both usually head to the cashier together to split the bills and choose what you guys wanted together, but since he insisted, you thought that you couldn’t refuse, no matter how many times you tried to talk to the man himself.

As you finally sat down and relaxed by looking out at the windows, Changmin quickly speed ran towards the display, took a picture of the pastries and desserts available, and sent them to the 98z group chat.

Chucky’s father: guys, which one do you think Y/N would like (inserts pic) Chucky’s father: i’m torn between getting the passionfruit meringue or the crispy caramel chocolate honey cake.   Kitty boy: well, why won’t you ask Y/N for their opinion? Melon pan: silly boy, obviously Changmin is trying to impress Y/N by picking something they’ll like on his own Chanel’s next top model: hold up while i key in those desserts into an online generator brb  Chucky’s father: asjdhdjdj okay  (seen for 2 minutes)  Chanel’s next top model: okay my phone says the passionfruit meringue.  Kitty boy: can you get the chocolate honey cake for me when you get back home please

You were beginning to worry as Changmin took longer than usual to get the food back to your table. Just as you were about to stand up to see what really was going on, the male returned with a tray filled with tons of mouthwatering desserts and your favourite drink, matcha latte.

“Changmin-ie, all of these-” 

“Don’t even think about splitting the bill, my treat today.” 

“Woah, look at you go. Did you just get a rise recently from Mr. Kim?” You nudged his shoulders. 

“I guess you can say something like that.” 

You both had a great time devouring all of these goodies while chatting and laughing away at so many random topics you both always seemed to enjoy talking about, ranging from how you both used to get into trouble and eventually ending up in the detention room during high school, to how you actually help saved Changmin’s ass from that one time where he almost exposed Mr. Kim’s secret stash of girl group albums hidden beneath his desk. 

Throughout eating halfway, you noticed how Changmin was staring quite intensely at your lips, which you knew very well how you had gotten some cream on them. It was something you didn’t mind at all, you can be a pretty messy eater at times when you get a little bit too excited with food. 

What was different this time was that Changmin actually leaned forward and wiped the cream away, not with the tissues that were given, but with his thumbs, and then proceeded to lick them like a puppy. 

Holy- 

You swear from the back of your mind something’s going on today.

Chucky’s dad: hey umm… Chucky’s dad: how do I yknow… hold Y/N hands in the best and most natural way possible  Kitty boy: umm… ask Y/N directly??  Melon pan: i’d say just go straight for it  Melon pan: be a man and take Y/N hands right away  Chanel’s next top model: ^^ what mr.kevin moon said  Chucky’s dad: okay sure it’s worth a shot i guess

As Changmin puts his phone away, his eyes are only met with your dangling hands on your side as you walk out of the cafe giddily. Having an internal battle with himself on how to grab hold of your hand is painful, so much so that he gets so frustrated with himself.

To the point that he immediately grabbed hold of your hand immediately, and a slight bit roughly too.

Puzzled, you asked the man for the sudden gesture. “Chan-changmin? What’s this all about?” 

“I.. umm… I thought your hands might be cold since it’s rather chilly today… and umm… I guess I could give you some warmth. If that’s what you’d like.” 

Funny. Changmin never speaks with sudden involuntary pauses in between. He’s always very straightforward and upfront with what he says, sometimes being a little too direct, as you would scold him. But this? It was truly something else. 

“Oh, umm yeah!! It is kinda chilly, thanks for the little warmer, I guess.” 

As you both slowly walked down the streets hand-in-hand, Changmin eventually loosened his grip and intertwined his fingers with yours, easing into this whole holding hands scenario. With that, a smile began to appear on his face as he quickened the walking speed, which meant you had to do the same since you both were literally holding hands with one another.

Okay, weirdo. 

It was about ten minutes after the somewhat relaxing and breezy walk when you both finally came across a florist shop. You thought Changmin was going to sign you up for the flower arranging lessons that they have been hosting since you literally told him how you’ve recently discovered the beauty of the activity itself and that you’re willing to give it a shot as a side hobby. 

Hence, you skipped happily right into the building, leaving Changmin behind to catch up with you.

Again, as you were out of sight, Changmin quickly whips up his phone and begins texting away for more help from his buddies.

Chucky’s dad: y’all, everything is going great so far Chucky’s dad: we’re finally at the florist  Melon pan: OMG IT’S FINALLY FLOWER TIME  Chucky’s dad: my question is  Chucky’s dad: which one should I get for Y/N 😭 Chucky’s dad: like something sweet yet meaningful Chanel’s next top model: okay but like go for something that symbolises love  Chanel’s next top model: but don’t get roses cs that’s so overrated  Chucky’s dad: 😭😭😭 Kitty boy: oh i found this website with a list full of potential ones to give Kitty boy: maybe it helps?  Chucky’s dad: thanks i’ll be needing them 😭

Once again, your best friend was gone for a period of time. You didn’t think much of it, thinking that he would probably ask some inquiries about signing up for the workshop.

What you didn’t expect was for the male to return with a bouquet of perfectly wrapped and decorated magenta lilacs, which you thought was very odd because you thought he would get you lavenders instead, your favourite kind of flowers. 

But the male didn’t say much and just shoved the bouquet right to you and demanded your thoughts about them immediately. So, of course, you decided to let out your most genuine train of thought. 

“Umm.. are you trying to get me into liking a new species of flowers?”

“Wh-what, no!! I mean… there weren’t many lavenders around for the day, so I decided to get you the closest shade of purple I could possibly find.” The male stammered while scratching the back of his neck, trying to fight against the awkwardness and the unexpected question that came from you.

In return, you smiled at your best friend while allowing the male to understand that he was somewhat still safe and the plan was a success. At the end of it all, you both still managed to secure a slot for the next workshop that will be happening the following weekend, and you both promised to attend before exiting the store.

If only you knew that those magenta lilacs were Changmin’s indirect attempt to tell you about the beginning of a new relationship with you.

Chucky’s dad: okay folks, change of plan Kitty boy: whatttt whyyyy Kitty boy: did you fail  Chucky’s dad: i mean Chucky’s dad: i did not expect Y/N would be so innocent 😭 Chanel’s next top model: or who knows Y/N might be doing it on purpose  Melon pan: OOOOOHHH Melon pan: like a playing hard-to-get situation  Chucky’s dad: do you really think so? Chanel’s next top model: nvm scratch that, i don’t speak Y/N language  Chucky’s dad: ajsksdjk  Chucky’s dad: Chanhee, for the love of god, please- Chanel’s next top model: okay fine Chanel’s next top model: i can guarantee that this next plan will surely work.

You were holding your bouquet while happily skipping down the road when your friend suddenly stopped you as he grabbed hold of your arm.

“Hey, Y/N. Can we, you know, just sit down and talk for a little bit?”

Now what in the world is going on with this dude today? 

Not wanting to question his actions further, you played along as he brought you to a nearby bench by the riverside. As you both found your comfortable positions, Changmin decided to pull out an item from his back pocket, and it was surely something that you hadn’t seen in a really long time.

“A paper fortune teller? Really, Changmin?” 

You both used to play with this simple yet intriguing fun game when you both were a lot younger. It was a thing of the past, where the youngsters would write down random topics ranging from their favourite colour to animal and began doing their magic with the paper fortune teller to see what you’ll eventually end up with at the end. 

But what does this have to do with any of these now? Unless Changmin was going through something in his own personal time where he is in dire need of using fortune telling method to help him decide the actions he should proceed with. 

Not explaining much to you, he gets you to choose each category from each layer from the paper, from your favourite television show at the moment to your favourite bubble tea chain store in town. 

As Changmin was working with the paper and eventually reached the final layer, he slowly and carefully unwrapped it fully to reveal the contents that were written within.

Y/N. Make or Break? 

You could’ve sworn that Changmin probably had a concussion, and whatever he was writing made absolutely no sense at all. Now, it was finally your turn to feel slightly frustrated and push the male to come clean and explain all of the weird behaviours and gestures that have happened throughout the entire day. 

It took a while for Changmin even to mutter up a word, but when he eventually did, it was definitely something that you weren’t expecting to hear from your best friend. 

“Listen, Y/N. All of these tiny little events I’ve done up to this point are all carried out from the multiple fantasies I’ve had about you.”

“Wh-what?” You immediately defended yourself by covering both of your arms across your body, starting to panic a little bit. “Are you trying to be a pervert, minnie!” 

“Of course not, Y/N! Okay, that came out wrong, what I meant was that it’s been a while since I’ve begun to see you differently.” 

“Ah-ha! Another dirty comment, Ji Changmin! Don’t test me-” 

“Stop! Hear me out!” Clearing his throat while grabbing hold of one of your shoulders to calm you down, he then decides to continue. “I am starting to believe that I care a lot about you. More than I have ever had when we were kids.”

Oh. 

“And…I don’t think I can see the Y/N that I’ve grown up with within you anymore, but rather, a much more mature and beautiful Y/N that makes my heart flutter whenever I see you face-to-face.” 

This time, he places the paper fortune teller down on his lap and takes both of your hands in his, and he now returns a rather serious look with you. 

“All of these dazzling fantasies I’ve had, from yearning for the day to be able to hold your hand to buying you a bouquet of flowers that indicates the start of our new relationship with one another, I definitely do not wish to leave them behind. In fact, I’d like to make them into a reality. And all of these ecstatic and vivid emotions I have towards you, I can no longer ignore them any further. Y/N, I don’t just like you anymore, I love you. And I ask this once more.”

“Make or Break?” 

Oh. Now, you were finally putting the puzzle pieces together. 

It took you over ten seconds to process the thought while staring at your best friend blankly. You have never dated, let alone been exposed to enough media or content in relation to romance. And because of that, you were slightly afraid. 

“Changmin-ie? Can I ask something first?”

“Of course, Y/N.”

You hesitated for a moment before finally posing the question. “Which of the two options will guarantee that our relationship now wouldn’t change for the worse?”

Oh, for the love of god, you were just so innocent. 

Changmin paused and had to take a few seconds to think of the right words to say in this situation. “Well, it is your decision, Y/N. At the end of the day, I’d like for us to remain as close as we can, like how we’ve always been. But if you’re willing to take a step further with me, I promise to hold you tight and never let you go. I’ll be with you eternally.” 

Just like that, you have finally made up your mind and know firmly now what the future holds. If it was this man who has decided to spend the rest of his life with you, then you can be rest assured knowing that you’ll be in safe hands.

You smiled and nodded your head vigorously before giving the male a reply. 

“Make it work then, Ji Changmin.” 

a/n: idk abt yall but growing up asian i used to love playing with those paper fortune tellers, and i thought it would be a cute idea to include it in this fic 🤭

masterlist

taglist: @deoboyznet @kflixnet @k-films @flwoie @hokupi @kyusqult @tinkerbell460 @cheonsafics @sulkygyu (join my permanent taglist here!)

[qoqurt]

° ᡣ𐭩 . ° . AHNTOPIA .ᐟ

daisy + her relationship with her siblings .ᐟ

read about daisy here | au masterlist

.𖥔 ݁ ˖ JIHOON AHN .ᐟ

born on may 4, 1998 — making him the oldest of the ahn siblings at 25

took on a father figure role after daisy and david were born, due to the fact that their parents were oftentimes busy with work

but because of this, all the ahn siblings are incredibly close

a taekwondo instructor — has been doing it since 2018, but has been taking classes himself since he was a kid

has taught daisy most of what she knows

she looks up to him a lot, and often goes to him for advice

theres a recurring gag / bit going on in which a vast majority of daisy’s friends find jihoon attractive or have had a crush on him — which peeves her to no end (affectionately)

was most likely the one to teach daisy how to drive

he reminds daisy of tadashi hamada from big hero 6

daisy inherits the Hopeless Romantic trait from him

currently residing in toronto for work

has bought flowers for their mom, daisy and yujin for valentines since daisy was 12 and will continue to do so for the foreseeable future

will just show up at daisy’s place to visit (with david)

tunes into ahn on the air every chance he gets. oftentimes texts daisy after broadcasting with his opinions on that day’s ‘sing you to sleep’ segment

.𖥔 ݁ ˖ YUJIN AHN .ᐟ

daisy’s oldest sister! born june 19, 2001 — making her oldest after jihoon at 22 years old

lives probably the farthest out of all of her siblings, currently living in seoul

daisy stays with her when she travels there

a popular twitch streamer in korea, often plays games like valorant and league

will have daisy on stream when she does val sometimes

definitely dotes on daisy a little more than jihoon does, but it’s because daisy’s a little more reliant on yujin

formula 1 junkie — she and daisy often talk about the races together

was the one who gifted daisy her first and only guitar — which daisy lovingly named ‘jin’ after her older sister

a lot of daisy’s clothes are yujin’s handmedowns

is the more introverted of the ahn siblings

both she and jihoon were forced to become camp counsellors at the same camp david and daisy attended — much to yujin’s chagrin

most of daisy and yujin’s hangouts consist of them staying home and watching movies or cooking together — or going shopping

they’re pen pals, often writing each other cute letters despite being able to text each other

.𖥔 ݁ ˖ DOYUN ‘DAVID’ AHN .ᐟ

daisy’s twin! both february babies (february 26th, 2003)

they’re definitely the closest out of all the siblings, but that’s a given considering the fact that they’re twins

they’re 100% each other’s person

because david got into hockey, daisy was quick to follow his footsteps by taking figure skating

have only really been apart for small increments of time (ie : when daisy visits stella and the hughes family, trips to korea, etc)

dealt with their first big separation when daisy moved to michigan for university, while david hung back and went to ubc

people often describe daisy and david as “one in the same,” having similar personalities but completely different interests

text and call very often

david has been playing hockey since he was a kid — even playing against luke and jack’s team once as children

he still plays hockey in university, but only recreationally now

.𖥔 ݁ ˖ GENERAL FACTS .ᐟ

their sibling group chat is called “ahn clan 🫶🏻” — and it’s used pretty frequently. they regularly keep in touch with one another

they regularly try to be there for each others functions when it’s possible

they try to at least have one family trip together every year

huge fights are incredibly rare, but they’ll have their petty squabbles more often than not (typically it’s david and yujin)

note from mei ꒰ᐢ. .ᐢ꒱ finally posted this bad boy!! i hope u like her siblings just as much as u like her 💔 they’re so dear and precious to me…

pookie tags ( ask to be added ! ) : @wintfleur @lovings4turn @iceflwers

[pikachu78109]

Am I writing down TCODC headcanons if they are living in the modern era? Yes, yes I am.

Cesare

Theater kid at heart, though pretty shy whenever eyes are on him. He doesn’t perform much because his legal guardian, Caligari, pretty much has him glued to his side. Bro desperately wants to dance his little goth heart out.

Isn’t allowed to have a phone, no social media, or access to the Internet whatsoever at the demand of Caligari.

Rarely has a social life. Cesare is mostly at home with his legal guardian, very rarely going out except when it has to deal with Caligari taking him to local fairs or academic conferences due to his profession. Very little interaction aside from occasional meetings with other people, mainly Caligari’s colleagues. However, he has met Jane a couple of times due to her father attending these conferences, thus beginning a secret friendship between the two.

Cesare being goth isn’t a choice; it’s what he prefers.

Cats flock to Cesare for some reason. They’ll appear in the neighborhood and come over to Cesare like a magnet. Even Caligari isn’t sure why and he’s currently writing up a study for the next conference to explain this.

Doesn’t talk too much. Selective mutism may be at play, but Cesare can communicate via sign language although he’s rusty at it.

Despite his intimidating stature and death-like appearance, Cesare is a pretty gentle guy.

Enjoys dark humor within forms of media ie. Cards Against Humanity.

Surprisingly likes cute things ie. flowers, plushies, stickers, and some pastel colors.

Jane

She isn’t valley girl, though a lot of people tend to make that assumption just because she comes from money. Jane hates that and tries very hard to debunk such nonsense by doing things that would make her “normal”.

I see Jane attending university, studying literature much like Alan, although her mother thinks that she’s better doing something much more important be it medical or law. However, Jane happens to be an avid reader and writer, so I can imagine Jane pursuing something creative as a way to challenge (and spite) her mother.

Speaking of writing, Jane has a guilty pleasure of writing fan fiction about her favorite characters, whether from anime (closet otaku) or from books.

She’s a dork at heart. She’s a-dorkable

As mentioned, Jane and Cesare have a hidden friendship. These two get together only during conferences to talk and hang in secret. Albeit briefly, Jane will gift Cesare a few small things like a plushie or accessories.

Jane is aware that she has secret admirers (looking at Francis and Alan). She can’t help but be annoyed by this, but is always polite when turning down advances. She’s not interested in dating.

Personally, I headcanon Jane to be aroace. She hasn’t said this to anyone aside from Cesare in secret.

Enjoys cozy things like tea, lofi, and cozy video games to play on her Switch.

Jane has known both Francis and Alan since childhood, so their bond as friends is very close. And Jane hopes that they’ll continue to be just friends.

Francis

I can imagine Francis being the jock-like type of guy who’s into sports like soccer. He’s quite athletic but not like all the time.

If he was in university, I think he would study finance or law enforcement. Part of me thinks he enjoys both for their content, but another aspect would be him wanting to impress Jane.

He deeply admires Jane, though may come off strongly. He doesn’t mean to; he tends to allow his emotions get the better of him. Very respectful, so he knows when to back off.

Part time worker at retail. Fucking hates it, but money is money. Has dealt with Caligari, the mother of all Karen’s, on a daily basis. Caligari only comes in when Francis is working just to spite him and abuses store policies just because he’s a customer and knows damn well that Francis can’t do anything about it. How he has not been banned remains a mystery.

Shares an apartment with Alan.

Cannot cook for shit. The best Francis can do is toasty PBJ and ramen noodles.

Shitty sleep schedule and a caffeine addiction to boot. Please keep Red Bull out of Francis’ vicinity. PLEASE.

Alan

The definition of a good boy.

Alan is a liberal arts student, hoping to either become a language arts teacher or author. He’s an eloquent speaker and compelling writer who’s able to produce prose and poems to capture his audience’s attention.

He and Jane share a lot of writing classes together, so they both share each other’s work sometimes and get ideas off one another.

Alan is bisexual (I am with the huge majority of people on this HC).

Works part-time at a café. Enjoys working there for the sweet tea, laid-back atmosphere, and comfortable decor.

Tends to stay awake late writing, so his sleep schedule is just as messy as Francis.

Can actually cook (thank god).

Alan is quite shy and skittish, but absolutely pleasant when around him. He’s always excited about a lot of things, so his energy radiates off of him and affects other people.

Comfort friend for when you need a cup of tea and a shoulder to lean on.

Hates confrontation, so Alan is a bit of a doormat.

Alan is the only one person with a driver’s license, so he’s always a designated driver for when he, Francis, and Jane hang out.

[maireadralph]

Spacebats IRL Meets @ Conventions (!?)

AKA “what do you call a gathering of Spacebats?”

So something I’d been thinking about for a while was ”what if the Spacebats / Entrapdaks actually meet IRL and would the universe implode if too many Entrapta fans were in the same room together?”

So the clogs in my head started turning…what would be a good way to get nerds in the same place? What kind of space would be 100% welcoming to everyone?

Of course the answer is simple…meet at the same Anime/Pop Culture Convention, even if the Convention is trash we can still have fun talking about Hordak’s butt ears and doing our own Post-Con things (like having a Cheeky Nandos)

For those of you unfamiliar with an anime/ pop culture Convention (henceforth going to be simply referred to as a ”Con”) it is a gathering of likeminded nerds to celebrate everything nerdy from anime to K-Pop to just quirky and silly things. Typically held over the course of three days. Some Cons have dedicated spaces for playing video games, taking photos, buying unique fan merch and of course cosplay (a short hand of Costume play). While not a requirement it can be fun to dress up as a favourite character or just admire other people’s cosplays. So there’s something for everyone.

With Cons being held all over the world if should be possible to find one that some Spacebats can attend at the same time So to start I’ve compiled a list of some of the most travel accessible (ie the ones that are easy to get to for as many people as possible) Cons for the European Spacebats.

American Spacebats are of course welcome to nominate and help others find their most travel accessible Con, as I’ve only been to GenCon SoCal and Pensacon I do not have enough experience with American Cons - please scroll down to the very bottom of this post for a blank form and fill it in to help your fellow Spacebats.

Okay so here’s the Cons I recommend starting with the Europe based listed under the cut:

Convention: AnimeCon NL

Location: Netherlands 

Dates (actual/ expected): Early June

Website: https://animecon.nl/regular/en

Notes: Location varies, currently De Broodfabriek, Volmerlaan 12, 2288 GD. Next event is smaller AnimeCon Classic 2022 held in Theater Hotel Almelo 23-25 Sept but since the venue hotel is already booked out on it’s website I have not included it here

Travel:

Nearest Airport: Schiphol 

Nearest Train Station: Rijswijk Direct

Public Transport available? Yes, Tram (purchase of an OV Chip Caard is recommend), Train  

Free Water Fountains at Venue? No

Hotels: 

https://animecon.nl/regular/en/location/hotels

Nearest Hotel average price: appox €100 a night

Location from Venue: varies

Transport to Venue: varies

Food:

Nearest Restaurant: varies

Nearest convenience store: Albert Heijin

Nearest Supermarket: Albert Heijin, Jumbo

Does venue have food available? Yes - Convention Food Stalls in the Food Court Average cost of venue food/drink: €9-13 for meal, €2.50-3 for a soft drink/coffee

Local Spacebat’s Recommendations:

(I’m not the Local for here BTW but been in Den Haag enough to know a few things). At the current location Den Haag (The Hague) is a good place to stay as it is is a single 30 minute tram ride away from Den Haag Centraal Station and Den Haag has a wild wide choice of supermarkets, restaurants and shops. 

AnimeCon assigns venue locations a Zone colour with Red Zones not allow any food/drink or large bags/backpacks/shopping bags.  Smaller bags are allowed (25cm x 14cm x 7cm) which MUST fit in their sizing box (an exemption pass can be obtained for large bags required for medical reasons).  These restricted items can be stored for free in the Bag Room or placed in rented lockers.  As queues for the bag room can be long, I recommend hiring a locker in advance but please check and double check the sizing as the current lockers can only hold one (1) backpack and jacket comfortably, maybe two (2) backpacks at a squeeze.

Travel accessible for European Spacebats

***

Convention: MCM Birmingham

Location: NEC Birmingham

Dates (actual/ expected): 12-13th Nov

Website: https://www.mcmcomiccon.com/birmingham/en-us/home.html

Travel:

Plane, Train, Car 

Nearest Airport: Birmingham International 

Nearest Train Station: Birmingham International Direct Public Transport available? Yes 

Free Water Fountains at Venue? Yes near Halls 5 and I think 7 (IIRC MCM is held in Halls 9-11)

Hotels:

Airport Hotels, Birmingham City Center 

Nearest Hotel average price: appox £180 per night source: https://hotelmap.com/events/MXE5P-LV 

Location from Venue: Airport Hotels: 15 or so minutes  City Center: 23 minute train + 10 minute walk 

Transport to Venue: Airport Hotel - Free Train Shuttle & walk.  City Center - Train & Walk

Food:

Nearest Restaurant: Wetherspoon’s (English Bar), Subway (takeaway sandwiches) in the NEC.  Nando’s, Zizzi’s (Pizza restaurant) located in Resort’s World 

Nearest convenience store: WH Smith’s located in Airport 

Nearest Supermarket: City Centre Tesco and Sainsbury’s

Does venue have food available? Yes 

Average cost of venue food/drink: around £8-15 depends on the item or meal

Local Spacebat’s Recommendations:

Be prepared for a long walk to the Halls as MCM is often held in the furthest out Halls. 

There maybe other events happening in other Halls at the same weekend. NEC has loads of space and one can wander freely around. 

There is also the Bear Grylss Adventure experience if the Con life isn’t for you and you feel like being Bow and shoot some arrows. 

Smaller two day event. 

SUPER easy to access via the Airport

Boots (a drug store) located in the Airport has packed lunch style picks and mix Meal Deals that come to around £4-5.

***

Convention: MCM London

Location: ExCel Center, Royal Victoria Dock, 1 Western Gateway, London E16 1XL 

Dates (twice yearly): 27th-30th October, End of June (check website)

Website: https://www.mcmcomiccon.com/london/en-us/home.html

Travel: 

By train, DLR (Docklands Light Railway kinda like a tram), car 

Nearest Airport: London City Airport. Heathrow (with the Elizabeth Line). Gatwick. 

Nearest Train Station: Custom House (DLR + Elizabeth Line), Prince Regent (DLR), West Silvertown (DLR + walk up a high metal bridge) 

Direct Public Transport available? Yes 

Free Water Fountains at Venue? Yes. Located at Hall S1 and IIRC Hall N5

Hotels:

Nearest Hotel average price:  around £200 a night, source: https://hotelmap.com/MJU9Y#hm;s=2022-10-27&e=2022-10-30&r=1&a=1&c=0&i=0&f=;hm 

Location from Venue: Walk 15 minutes 

Transport to Venue: Walk 15 minutes 

Notes: There is a Premier Inn or Travelodge in Woolwich Arsenal one stop away on the Elizabeth Line (3 minute ride)

Food:

Nearest Restaurant: The Fox Bar, Tapas Bar (all outside) 

Nearest convenience store: Tesco Express (unsure of location but heard it’s near) 

Nearest Supermarket: Tesco Express 

Does venue have food available? Yes, cafe and fast food 

Average cost of venue food/drink: Venue’s meal deals for one person (sandwich or equivalent with snack and bottle of drink) are around the £10.  Convention food is around the same price

Local Spacebat’s Recommendations:

Event tickets can be mailed out (for a small fee) if ordered in advance.  If these tickets are Weekend or Priority Entry then the holder can skip the main ticket queue and walk in the main Custom House Entrance. 

There are security bag checks on the entrances and bags will be checked by security upon re-entry.

 Restaurants within the venue are nearby are going to be very busy post event. I would recommend taking the Elizabeth Line one stop (3 minutes ride) to Woolwich Arsenal where it will be much quieter and there is a larger selection of restaurants like Beef Eater (a fancy English “pub grub”), [Cheeky] Nando’s (Portuguese Chicken restaurant) and McDonalds. 

Sometimes MCM will only allow Weekend Pass, Priority Pass or Disability Pass holders re-entry via the main entrance with ALL other pass holders being forced to re-entry via the ticket queue.  On the subject of re-entry MCM staff wouldn’t always mention the last re-entry time and will often stop ALL re-entry in the last hour or half hour of the event day.

***

Those are my main three, I could have gone on about other London Cons but they aren’t as easily accessible as those three  Yes there is the opportunity for Spacebats to stay at each other’s homes or rent an AirB&B I just listed options that would give us all some space - phew that was a lot of writing 😅 

And now the Blank for other Spacebats to contribute their Con wisdom - hopefully the Hivemind can find something that we can work with and finally get to meet each other IRL!!

BLANK:

Convention:

Location:

Dates (actual/ expected):

Website:

Travel:

Nearest Airport:

Nearest Train Station:

Direct Public Transport available? Y/N

Free Water Fountains at Venue? Y/N

Hotels:

Nearest Hotel average price:

Location from Venue:

Transport to Venue:

Food:

Nearest Restaurant:

Nearest convenience store:

Nearest Supermarket:

Does venue have food available? Y/N

Average cost of venue food/drink:

Local Spacebat’s Recommendations:

If applicable please add further notes on the venue, past events, restaurant recommendations and helpful tips (for example if event has a Will Call or equivalent service for ticket collection)

[lauriepinkney64]

spiritual injury, the original wound

Created: Sunday, January 29, 2023 7:18 AM

Updated: Sunday, January 29, 2023 8:24 AM

upon meditation and reflection of my current past i found a significnt spiritual wound incurred within the organized religon i was raised. 

i was born to a family that were devout members of the sda church.  we went to church every week, and attended their church schools, and abode the laws and rules of this church during the week, man head of household, no fun and observance of sabbath from friday sundown to saturday sundown. strict.  it relaxed, the fervor, as we aged, and we'd even skip church or sometimes only sabbath school, (sundayschool), sometimes opting to have 'church' outside like at a park, these were by far more spiritual gatherings than any id had in the church building.  i could feel source profoundly when outside in nature.

i was baptized at age 12, mostly because my cousin had been, but during the preparation class or classes i felt something significant begin to expand inside., my grandfather was re baptized with me and that moved me more than my own baptism.  this feeling has never left me, it is the reason i love to help others, i want to assist the lost  i want to comfort the hurt and i want to heal the wounded,  this is my purpose.

as i became more myself and grew into teenhood, i began to feel the discord between the church teachings and the words actions and feeling atmousphere in the church family.  i saw the judgement of those deemed not og or not falling within the rules of this church, ie wearing makeup and jewelry were discouraged frowned upon , judged and seen as vanity, or divorced, or didnt observe sabbath the right way, or chose to eat meat, sda is largely vegegarian. so many harsh misunderstandings and judgements  from a group designated to heal these wounds not inflict them, so much visible obvious hipocrasy, things didnt match up!  i was blessed with a youth group leader couple in my 14th year of life.  they used the living bible, plain real talk, and introduced me and others to the cs lewis chronicles of narnia, this inflamed my imagination and passion for learning the broader knowing of the universe, these two angels delved into daniel and revelation in a way that was powerfully inspiring and motivating for me to uncover the truth of all spirituality and about myself.  this was when i began to peel away from that which i was raised with and began learning things first hand, and i felt such distance between me and church, i felt repelled, i made a cursery attempt to appear connected to church mostly for mom so she'd not worry and i was fearful to admit my lifestyle choices, love women, dont love church.

i felt rejected and judged harshly by my church family, in that subtle way that happens in dynamics like that.  i had loved this church, been loyal and devout to the teachings, i had depended on its teachings to help me navigate my life and when i finally understood a  truth of myself i found that i was not included as i am, i was deemed unfit or sinful, just being myself, this is not unique to sda, in this era, '70's, almost all organized religon seemed to feel that way, change or we wont accept you,  it was invalidated and pronounced a sin, who i am is a sin?  the one place i had before found solice, found a home, a community and i wasnt wanted. i was deemed bad.  or misguided, judging my self discovery and seeking self understanding as invalid and wrong somehow. blasphemy even. 

leaving the church of my youth which had included school and the social contacts i had made, and birth family, i experienced grief, i had no support system anymore and i had to develop my own without their help.

as  i aged i found myself identifying with the lesbian community, and found comfort solice acceptance there, and peace within myself about myself.  this allowed me some grace to begin the healing journey.

this injury was big and i buried it deep, it makes sense it is foundational and near the last of my 'flies in the ointment'.

years later after trying to make a straight life for the approval of my family and church supports, and having become bulimic and terribly depressed i accepted who i was and came out to her.  she guessed before i said it..she also said i was on my own about telling my dad, another cut to the mother wound that i would bury until she was buried. he did not react well.  he asked me 'what do you want from me?!" i said i just want to know you still love me,  he seemed so angry, like he was taking this personally, as if i did this to him ,  he told me 'if you are with anyone just dont ever bring them around here', he was furious.

he avoided me and ignored me and basically cut me out for over a year which hurt me so much, mom told me later that she'd finally said something to him, if you don't get over this you are gonna lose her' she stoodup for me, finally!!! 

he did come around when i needed a car, he helped me and financed a vw bus combi he had, this helped us regain some communication.  it stayed somewhat stilted for awhile then i met patty and my family suddenly became protective, worried i was being used or taken advantage of.

i came to pattys home after a tumultous relationship with a woman with a daughter, i stayed for the kid but had to leave from the abusive behaviors toward me by her mother.   patty welcomed me with open arms, she loved me, fed me, held me, allowed me sanctuary to heal.  she has been my angel.

my brother even came to sheridan to see that all was copacetic., i was working with her son, she was my employer technically.

she has been integral in my further growth,  i was in need of a heavy mother energy and she provided this often without even realizing it.  she helped me see my history realistically and gently suggested that my 'close knit family' really wasn't so much, and urged me to have the courage to look at all things honestly, i learned how not to lie to myself, coping skill, and i began a new method of introspection without toxic positivity,  it has helped me to heal so much.

[aboutanancientenquiry]

A young Black American Classicist talks about the depiction of Africans in ancient Greek pottery (and explains why Herodotus is his favorite ancient Greek)

“ Constructing the African: A Panoply Interview with Najee Olya.

We’re delighted to have the chance to speak to Najee Olya, a PhD student at the University of Virginia, USA, working on the dissertation, Constructing the African in Ancient Greek Vase-Painting: Images, Meanings and Contexts. Before beginning doctoral study, Najee earned a B.A. in Anthropology and Classical Civilization at the University of Illinois at Chicago and an M.A. in Classics at the University of Arizona. In the field, he has participated in archaeological excavations in Italy at Etruscan Populonia at Poggio del Molino, and since 2018 at Mt. Lykaion in Arcadia, Greece. Najee is currently a William Sanders Scarborough Fellow at the American School of Classical Studies in Athens, researching vases in Greek collections and their archaeological contexts. The next academic year will see him take up a post as the Bothmer Fellow in the Department of Greek and Roman Art at the Metropolitan Museum in New York. In this interview, Najee offers insight into his research on Africans in ancient Greek pottery… 1) What contexts do you think ancient Greeks and ancient Africans are encountering each other in? I think that the primary context would be in Egypt. Given that there are Greeks in Egypt in the Archaic period as mercenaries and at Naukratis, it must be there that Greeks are encountering not only Egyptians but people from elsewhere in Africa, especially from south of Egypt itself—what the Greeks generally referred to as Aithiopia (not to be confused with the modern state). I also suspect that major hubs of maritime trade would have been the sorts of places where Greeks encountered people from Africa, at various ports and emporia – trading posts - around the Aegean and the wider Mediterranean. Conversely, I’m inclined to think that direct contacts on the Greek mainland were somewhat limited. That said, in a major city like Athens, for example, the interest in Africans among potters and vase-painters seems to indicate at least some kind of familiarity with what Africans looked like that doesn’t appear to come from just seeing artistic depictions. Moreover, there were almost certainly foreigners and people of foreign descent working in the Kerameikos in Athens, so it's impossible to rule out that at least one or two may have been from Africa. There’s also Athens’s port at Piraeus, which saw a lot of traffic from a variety of traders and merchants.

Above, a janiform cup (ie. two heads back-to-back like the god, Janus), showing an African and a European, Attic c.500-450BCE, The Art Museum, Princeton University: 33.45. 2) Who are the Africans depicted in Greek pottery – what trends are there? There are three categories, as far as I can tell, into which the Africans depicted in Greek pottery can be grouped. Two of these are fairly straightforward mythological episodes and scenes of daily life. The third is more difficult, and consists of imagery that doesn’t fit neatly into either of the two other categories. In terms of the mythological episodes, the main figures from Africa are Memnon and Andromeda. The pair are both said to be royalty from Aithiopia in the mythological tradition. Memnon was king of Aithiopia and an ally to Troy in the Trojan War, where he led a huge army from Aithiopia before eventually being killed by the hero Achilles. Andromeda was an Aithiopian princess who was offered up as a sacrifice to appease the ketos serpent, a sea monster sent by Poseidon to ravage the coasts of Aithiopia after Andromeda’s mother Cassieopeia had boasted that she (Cassieopeia) was more beautiful than the Nereids. Andromeda was rescued by Perseus, and the two married. In vase painting, Neither Memnon nor Andromeda are shown as African themselves, but there are instances in the iconography where Memnon is shown preparing to depart for Troy attended by African warriors. In the Andromeda scenes, she is shown being bound between stakes for the ketos monster, sometimes in Persian dress. There are Africans on a number of the Andromeda vases. There are some mythological traditions which associate Memnon and Andromeda with the Near East, so this might explain why they are not depicted as African themselves.

Above, Andromeda with African attendants, Attic pelike c.475-425BCE, Boston Museum of Art, 63.2663. Next, there are depictions of the hero Herakles in Egypt and Libya. In Egypt, he encounters the pharaoh Busiris, who wants to sacrifice the hero to end a drought. On pottery Herakles is shown routing Busiris and his priests, who are always depicted as African men. In Libya, Herakles is accosted by the earth giant Antaios, who waylays strangers, forces them to wrestle, and then adorns the temple of Poseidon with their bones after he has killed them. Herakles defeats Antaios by lifting him from the ground as they wrestle and cutting him off from the Earth, from which he derived his strength. On pottery, physical contrast is shown between the two as they wrestle—Antaios has a long unkempt beard and hair, similar to Egyptian depictions of Libyans.

Above, Heracles fights Busiris, Attic pelike c.500-450BCE, Athens, National Museum: CC1175. As for images from daily life, we have African stable-hands, warriors, and some attendants at the grave. These figures can generally be identified by their very curly hair and prominent noses. The last set of objects includes things like plastic vases, which show either full African figures or African faces alone or paired with women, satyrs, Herakles, and Dionysos. Finally, there are alabastra, a shape that rather circuitously made its way to Greece from Egypt, used for perfumed oil which depict African warriors.

Above, An African groom cares for a horse, Attic kylix c.490, Metropolitan Museum of Art, 1989.281.71. 3) Some Africans seem to be represented rather beautifully; other depictions feel a bit… off. What’s the balance between realism, idealism, and hostile caricature in ancient Greek depictions of Africans? On the whole, I would say that most of the depictions are not hostile caricature. I can think of one example, a lekythos in the National Archaeological Museum in Athens, which shows what seems to be an African woman being tortured by satyrs. There is also at least one image of a figure who may be African shown wearing shackles and is unambiguously an enslaved person. I do not think, however, that it is possible to definitively call either instance caricature. Plastic vessels made in the form of African youths being attacked by crocodiles have sometime been interpreted as cruel, mocking images, but one can just as easily say that these show interest in the river Nile and awareness of its dangerous fauna. Aside from these examples, however, I think that many of the images are either ambiguous or benign. It is difficult to know what the representations were meant to convey to ancient Greek users. When it comes to realism, the images are realistic to a degree, but as with all ancient Greek art, it is superficial and illusory. Especially when it comes to pottery, I think that one has to remember that the medium and its convention limit just how true-to-life the representations can be. The end result is something of a pastiche of reality and imagination—the vase-painter selects the subject matter and then executes it in his own way, but the final product will always be constrained by things like the limited colour palette and the curving surface of the vase.

Above, an African youth attacked by a crocodile, Attic rhyton, c.350BCE, Fitzwilliam Museum, Cambridge GR.58.1865. 4) Overall, what does pottery add to our understanding of ancient Greek ideas about Africans and Africa? First and foremost, I think it reminds us that ancient Greece was part of an interconnected ancient Mediterranean. Also, that “ancient Greece” spanned three continents, with settlements and poleis not just in Europe but also in North Africa and Western Asia. Pottery tells us that ancient Greeks were interested in depicting foreign people such as Africans, and while it is difficult to interpret all of the different representations, it is clear that potters and vase-painters found Africans an intriguing subject, and that the purchasers of Athenian vases did too. The representations, in a general way, seem to indicate that Athenians were thinking about North Africa in particular, especially Libya and Egypt, where there were permanent Greek settlements. What they specifically thought about Africans is harder to determine from the pottery itself, but it does not seem to be the case that Africans were viewed any differently than other foreigners. Certainly, there was a general chauvinism toward non-Greeks, but Africans do not appear to have been singled out more than other groups, such as Persians or Scythians.

Above, An African in trousers, Attic alabastron, c.500-450, The J. Paul Getty Museum: 71.AE.202. 5) What would you like to see improved in terms of using pottery to increase general understanding of Black people within ancient Greek culture? One thing that could use some improvement is the terminology used to describe the artifacts, which is often simultaneously both outdated and anachronistic. In scholarship this is due in part to the rather small corpus dealing with Africans on Greek pottery, much of which is several decades old now. Also, you will often see in museums or on museum websites descriptions that assume the depictions of Africans on vases are slaves, without any explanation, or descriptions that make use of discredited race-essentialist anthropology to discuss their physical characteristics. I think that it’s extremely important to rethink how Greek vases with depictions of Africans are presented in museums, as those are the spaces where the wider public is most likely to encounter the artifacts. Some museums are already making efforts to rethink their use of language for the objects, such as the J. Paul Getty Museum and the North Carolina Museum of Art. I was recently asked by a curator at the latter to write a new label for an Athenian black-figure vase in their collection which has a depiction of Memnon and one of his African warriors. Hopefully the number of museums revamping their descriptions will increase going forward.

Above, King Memon with African attendants, Attic amphora by Exekias, c.575-525, British Museum, B209, previously 1849,0518.10. 6) Perhaps you could tell us a bit about your Fellowships – what they are, how they work? I’ve been fortunate enough to have been awarded several fellowships that allowed me to study in Greece — from the American School of Classical Studies at Athens (ASCSA) and the American Philosophical Society (APS). I started out at the American School in 2017 with a scholarship for the Summer Session, which is a six-week course involving travel around Greece to archaeological sites and museums. I came back to the ASCSA two years later in 2019 with a fellowship to participate in the Regular Program, which is an academic year spent in Athens, travelling around Greece more than the Summer Session. Now, I’m wrapping up my third stay at the American School with a fellowship as an Associate Member. This time, I’m focused entirely on working on my dissertation and taking the opportunity to revisit artifacts in museums relevant to my research, in addition to obtaining special permission to photograph many of the vases outside of their displays. I received a Lewis and Clark Grant from the APS in 2019, which allowed me to do field research in Greece. I travelled to archaeological sites that are documented as having had material from Egypt excavated there, created an archive of photographs, and got a better sense of the sites and their topography from first-hand observation. Finally, in September 2022 I’ll be at the Metropolitan Museum of Art in New York for a year as the Bothmer Fellow in the Department of Greek and Roman Art. The fellowship will allow me to complete my dissertation and to access a number of the vases included in it, as well as the Met’s libraries. It’s worth keeping your eyes open to see what opportunities and funding are available. 7) Who’s your favourite ancient Greek? It might be an obvious answer, but I will say Herodotus. I first read the Histories almost fifteen years ago as a Classics undergraduate, first in translation in a course taught wonderfully by Nanno Marinatos, and then in ancient Greek language courses. I think that it must be Herodotus’s interest in different cultures and his efforts to understand and make them legible for his readers that resonated with me, especially as someone who had already studied a bit of anthropology and archaeology before I came to Classics. As much as I enjoyed Herodotus years ago, I had pretty much left him behind until I selected my dissertation topic at the end of the first year working on the PhD. Since then, I’ve been revisiting him, as he famously writes about both Egypt and Aithiopia. I still read the Histories with a sense of wonder, but now I appreciate the complexity and sophistication of the work even more. Herodotus is one of the people from antiquity that I’d love to have a chat with if time travel were possible! Many thanks to Najee for sharing his expertise!”

Source: http://panoplyclassicsandanimation.blogspot.com/2022/06/constructing-african-panoply-interview.html

Panoply is the blog of historian of ancient Greece Dr. Sonja Nevin and of animator Steve Simons.

[leaguedrita]

The laundry guy tlc

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Please, have complete confidence in Troy and his team with your precious rugs, I can assure you, you will not be disappointed. As each rug was unrolled, my joy increased, I was falling in love with my beautiful rugs all over again.So, my rugs are now clean, smell sweet and are so soft under the foot. Colours I had forgotten were there, I cannot tell you how happy I was. We were so pleased as we’d really missed them.So, they arrive.I’m so excited to see them and hope they are not only clean but still in one look brand new, as if we had just purchased them 30 years ago. 2 weeks later we had an email to say they were lovely and clean and ready to be delivered. Within a day I’d had a condition report and a telephone conversation to confirm what we wanted to have done as they offer a range. So off they went, I have to admit I was a little apprehensive as 4 of theses rugs were expensive Qashqais and impossible to replace. He was very polite and said, “don’t worry, I’ve seen it all, I’m used to it”. So when they were collected by the lovely Aled, I did warn him that they honked. ON SALE - UP TO 75 OFF Bathroom Vanities Chandeliers Bar Stools Pendant Lights Rugs Living Room Chairs Dining Room Furniture Wall Lighting Coffee Tables Side & End Tables Home Office Furniture Sofas Bedroom Furniture Lamps Mirrors. While laundry is often a common topic of conversation in the store, Richardson sells. A rose-wielding single woman looks for Mr Right among a passel of hunky men, just like on 'The Bachelor' but with the gender roles reversed.

The laundry guy tlc tv#

We had tried to clean them over the years but did more damage than good. While laundry and washing your clothes and other textiles is what Richardson is known for across the country, thanks to his TV show and 2021 book, 'Laundry: Finding Joy in a Common Chore,' in Minnesota he is known for a store at the famed Mall of America. They’ve had 4 dogs, 2 kids and 2 completely different environments to contend with ie sandy and muddy paws/feet and were extremely soiled in places. They have been an absolute delight to deal with since the first phone call.We had 6 carpets that we purchased in Saudi Arabia 30 years ago. We hope you support this endeavor.I can’t praise or recommend the rug laundry highly enough. They are ready for the challenge, but learned early that one should have to do it alone. There are so many great people in the world and so many more wonderful things to do to advance us as a society. They have witnessed the worst in people during traumatic times and despite these moments, they recognize the goodness in people. They have 40 years of combined experience in law enforcement and have seen many tragic moments on the job. Tosha also received her Master's Degree in Children's Law and Policy from Loyola University School of Law in Chicago. from Illinois State University where she majored in Communications and minored in Sociology. Jesse, who works there, was very nice and helpful as Im a guy And dont know what Im doing. Our 80 pound machines can wash and dry large comforters. Jacqui is a graduate of Northeastern Illinois University where she majored in Psychology and minored in Criminal Justice. Welcome to TLC Laundry We offer New Machines, large capacity machines, fully attended, convenient card system. Jacqui excelled at basketball and became a collegiate athlete while Tosha just admired her, but didn't quite become as great as her big cousin in that arena. They were two of three girls growing up on the block, while the other seven kids were boys, so having to be tough came early. Jacqui and Tosha are cousins and come from a very large family. The Laundry Cafe-Evanston will be where community meets necessity. They want to bring a unique spin to doing laundry in Evanston, while bringing a community element to such an essential chore. There is currently no set release date for Season 2 of 'The Blended Bunch.' In fact, Season 1 ended so abruptly that many fans wondered if it was canceled mid-season, according to. They were both born and raised in Evanston, IL and have a strong sense of belonging to the city. Magazine Investigates at 10p TLC: Seeking Sister Wife at 8p and Return To. Tosha Wilson and Jacqui White are the co-creaters of The Laundry Cafe project. Smoke at 1p discovery+: The Laundry Guy HGTV: The Laundry Guy at 10p.

[pettyprocrastination]

Hi! I don’t know if you want idea for your school dilemma but I’m going to include one, if you’re not looking for solutions then feel free to delete this and just know someone is thinkin of you!

Idea: I don’t know how your university works but at the college I attended we had the option to still graduate (ie. Walk in the ceremony with all our classmates) and then just take the last few credits over the summer and then they would send our diploma. I know that doesn’t help with the grad school dilemma, but I know how important all of the graduation excitement is and how upsetting it is to not be able to celebrate with classmates.

Ah thank yoU! Sadly the amount of credits I need (currently at 96 but need 120) means i may have to split it between two semesters because summer classes are notoriously limited in at our university and very hard.

I'm gonna see if i can maybe do four classes over the summer (itll be split two each five week session) but I know the summer classes are BRUTAL and that we don't have a lot offered during the summer to begin with :(

[evanescentreverie]

[ 10:03 P.M. ]

"Can you meet me halfway?" Seungcheol could hear the fear in your voice, alarms ringing in his head the more he listened to you. "I think someone is following me."

“What?” The drowsiness that he felt since earlier was all but gone as he sat straight, immediately standing up as he found himself leaving your shared bedroom. "Who's following you?"

"I-I don't know Cheol-ie." The panic in your voice was evident, your anxiousness resonating with his as he headed towards the front door. He mentally cursed as the worry he felt increased, berating himself for not fetching you from your university.

"Take deep breaths (Y/n) and try to calm down." When there was silence on your end, he knew that you were doing as you were told. He smiled, "That's my girl. Can you tell me where you are?" He tucked the phone between his head and shoulder as he wore his shoes, tightening the lace so that he could run easily.

"I'm almost at the convenience store near our apartment."

"That's good." He headed out, locking the door behind him before running as fast as he can towards where you were, "I need you to go inside the convenience store and wait for me there. Can you do that for me, babe?"

"I can." He heard you gulp, causing his heart to grow more anxious at the thought of anything happen to you, "Please hurry."

Seungcheol nodded despite you not seeing him, "I'll run as fast as I can. Don't hang up. Just continue talking to me, okay?"

"Okay, I love you." The usual affectionate feel that those words brought was absent, the current situation making your words feel like a goodbye. He didn't know what he'd do if something were to happen to you, the thought of you being in pain tugging his heart uncomfortably.

He wanted to punch the guy once he saw him, a variety of emotions filling up his heart. Nonetheless, Seungcheol stayed calm, speeding up his pace so he could reach you faster.

"I love you too. How were your exams?" He asked, making small talks in hopes that he could calm both you and him.

"It's fine, I could've done better but I think I passed."

"Good girl. I knew you could do it, I'm so proud of you. Did your professor finally attend your class?"

"I wish," He smiled when he heard you chuckle, his heart calming down a bit when he heard. "He has yet to... Oh God..."

"(Y/n)?" He called, the worry that he was hiding earlier now painfully evident. It was silent on your end, feeling the anxiousness from earlier growing as seconds passed by. "Are you still there? Answer me."

"He... He went inside the store, Cheol. I think he got impatient."

"Shit." Seungcheol cursed under his breath, "I'm almost there, just keep your distance from him, okay? Try to stay at a spot where a person can see you. You have your pepper spray in your bag, right?"

"Yeah, I do," You whimpered, his heart throbbing at the sound of it. "I'm scared, Cheol-ie..."

"I know, I know. I need you to be brave for me, okay? I'm sorry I'm not by your side but I promise nothing bad will happen to you." His eyes lit up when he saw the convenience store, immediately barging through the store. He scanned the area, eyes searching for you and you only . "Okay, I'm here (Y/n), where..."

"Cheol!" His head darted towards your voice, hanging up the phone as his feet immediately lead him towards you. He placed his hands on either sides of your shoulders, eyes scanning you from top to bottom to check if you were safe. Once he was sure that you were, he wrapped his arms around you, holding you tightly in relief. "Thank God."

He felt you wrap your hands around him as well, your head buried in his chest as he felt your hold tighten. Seungcheol buried his head on your shoulder, voice down to a whisper, "I'm here, I'll keep you safe."

He could feel your heart beating erratically with his, sweet words leaving his lips as he did his best to calm you down.

When he was sure that you did, he broke his hold on you. His hands cup your cheek, "You were so brave. I'm so proud of you, (Y/n)."

He saw how you weakly smiled, his lips mirroring yours before remembering what caused this situation. Seungcheol scanned the area once more, checking to see which idiot dared put you in harm's way.

Once he saw the person he assumes was the one following you, he glared, arms placed around your shoulder to show that he was with you. He wanted to make him quiver, tremble even, due to the anger he now felt and he wanted to make him remember it clearly. He was about to head towards him but a tug on the edge of his clothes was enough to make him stop.

Seungcheol turned his head towards you, eyes meeting his as you shook your head no. He gulped before standing down, choosing instead to glare at the person harshly.

He saw the person look away, the irritation on his face obvious as he left the store. He let out a scoff once he did, genuinely angry that he placed you in that situation. He didn't know what he'd do to the person if you didn't stop him, his mind already thinking of ways he could deal with him.

That person was lucky that you were there to calm him.

His thoughts were broken off when he heard you sigh in relief, his head turning towards you once more as he gave a comforting smile. His hands found its way towards yours, intertwining his fingers around yours as he squeezed it comfortingly. "Are you okay? Do you want to buy anything? (Favorite Snack)? (Favorite Drink)?"

You shook your head once more, your hands squeezing his as your eyes turned teary, the amount of emotions you felt overwhelming you. "I was so scared, Cheol-ie..."

Seungcheol frowned due to this, his heart pricked at the sight of your tears. "I know," He placed a hand on your head, lightly patting it as an act of comfort, "You're safe now, I'm here." Seungcheol placed a light kiss on your forehead, knowing that the gesture was something you loved, "I'm here."

[blackswaneuroparedux]

Anonymous asked: I enjoyed reading your posts about Napoleon’s death and it’s quite timely given its the 200th anniversary of his death this year in May. I was wondering, because you know a lot about military history (your served right? That’s cool to fly combat helicopters) and you live in France but aren’t French, what your take was on Napoleon and how do the French view him? Do they hail him as a hero or do they like others see him like a Hitler or a Stalin? Do you see him as a hero or a villain of history?

5 May 1821 was a memorable date because Napoleon, one of the most iconic figures in world history, died while in bitter exile on a remote island in the South Atlantic Ocean. Napoleon Bonaparte, as you know rose from obscure soldier to a kind of new Caesar, and yet he remains a uniquely controversial figure to this day especially in France. You raise interesting questions about Napoleon and his legacy. If I may reframe your questions in another way. Should we think of him as a flawed but essentially heroic visionary who changed Europe for the better? Or was he simply a military dictator, whose cult of personality and lust for power set a template for the likes of Hitler? 

However one chooses to answer this question can we just - to get this out of the way - simply and definitively say that Napoleon was not Hitler. Not even close. No offence intended to you but this is just dumb ahistorical thinking and it’s a lazy lie. This comparison was made by some in the horrid aftermath of the Second World War but only held little currency for only a short time thereafter. Obviously that view didn’t exist before Hitler in the 19th Century and these days I don’t know any serious historian who takes that comparison seriously.

I confess I don’t have a definitive answer if he was a hero or a villain one way or the other because Napoleon has really left a very complicated legacy. It really depends on where you’re coming from.

As a staunch Brit I do take pride in Britain’s victorious war against Napoleonic France - and in a good natured way rubbing it in the noses of French friends at every opportunity I get because it’s in our cultural DNA and it’s bloody good fun (why else would we make Waterloo train station the London terminus of the Eurostar international rail service from its opening in 1994? Or why hang a huge gilded portrait of the Duke of Wellington as the first thing that greets any visitor to the residence of the British ambassador at the British Embassy?). On a personal level I take special pride in knowing my family ancestors did their bit on the battlefield to fight against Napoleon during those tumultuous times. However, as an ex-combat veteran who studied Napoleonic warfare with fan girl enthusiasm, I have huge respect for Napoleon as a brilliant military commander. And to makes things more weird, as a Francophile resident of who loves living and working in France (and my partner is French) I have a grudging but growing regard for Napoleon’s political and cultural legacy, especially when I consider the current dross of political mediocrity on both the political left and the right. So for me it’s a complicated issue how I feel about Napoleon, the man, the soldier, and the political leader.

If it’s not so straightforward for me to answer the for/against Napoleon question then it It’s especially true for the French, who even after 200 years, still have fiercely divided opinions about Napoleon and his legacy - but intriguingly, not always in clear cut ways.

I only have to think about my French neighbours in my apartment building to see how divisive Napoleon the man and his legacy is. Over the past year or so of the Covid lockdown we’ve all gotten to know each other better and we help each other. Over the Covid year we’ve gathered in the inner courtyard for a buffet and just lifted each other spirits up.

One of my neighbours, a crusty old ex-general in the army who has an enviable collection of military history books that I steal, liberate, borrow, often discuss military figures in history like Napoleon over our regular games of chess and a glass of wine. He is from very old aristocracy of the ancien regime and whose family suffered at the hands of ‘madame guillotine’ during the French Revolution. They lost everything. He has mixed emotions about Napoleon himself as an old fashioned monarchist. As a military man he naturally admires the man and the military genius but he despises the secularisation that the French Revolution ushered in as well as the rise of the haute bourgeois as middle managers and bureaucrats by the displacement of the aristocracy.

Another retired widowed neighbour I am close to, and with whom I cook with often and discuss art, is an active arts patron and ex-art gallery owner from a very wealthy family that came from the new Napoleonic aristocracy - ie the aristocracy of the Napoleonic era that Napoleon put in place - but she is dismissive of such titles and baubles. She’s a staunch Republican but is happy to concede she is grateful for Napoleon in bringing order out of chaos. She recognises her own ambivalence when she says she dislikes him for reintroducing slavery in the French colonies but also praises him for firmly supporting Paris’s famed Comédie-Française of which she was a past patron.

Another French neighbour, a senior civil servant in the Elysée, is quite dismissive of Napoleon as a war monger but is grudgingly grateful for civil institutions and schools that Napoleon established and which remain in place today.

My other neighbours - whether they be French families or foreign expats like myself - have similarly divisive and complicated attitudes towards Napoleon.

In 2010 an opinion poll in France asked who was the most important man in French history. Napoleon came second, behind General Charles de Gaulle, who led France from exile during the German occupation in World War II and served as a postwar president.

The split in French opinion is closely mirrored in political circles. The divide is generally down political party lines. On the left, there's the 'black legend' of Bonaparte as an ogre. On the right, there is the 'golden legend' of a strong leader who created durable institutions.

Jacques-Olivier Boudon, a history professor at Paris-Sorbonne University and president of the Napoléon Institute, once explained at a talk I attended that French public opinion has always remained deeply divided over Napoleon, with, on the one hand, those who admire the great man, the conqueror, the military leader and, on the other, those who see him as a bloodthirsty tyrant, the gravedigger of the revolution. Politicians in France, Boudon observed, rarely refer to Napoleon for fear of being accused of authoritarian temptations, or not being good Republicans.

On the left-wing of French politics, former prime minister Lionel Jospin penned a controversial best selling book entitled “the Napoleonic Evil” in which he accused the emperor of “perverting the ideas of the Revolution” and imposing “a form of extreme domination”, “despotism” and “a police state” on the French people. He wrote Napoleon was "an obvious failure" - bad for France and the rest of Europe. When he was booted out into final exile, France was isolated, beaten, occupied, dominated, hated and smaller than before. What's more, Napoleon smothered the forces of emancipation awakened by the French and American revolutions and enabled the survival and restoration of monarchies. Some of the legacies with which Napoleon is credited, including the Civil Code, the comprehensive legal system replacing a hodgepodge of feudal laws, were proposed during the revolution, Jospin argued, though he acknowledges that Napoleon actually delivered them, but up to a point, "He guaranteed some principles of the revolution and, at the same time, changed its course, finished it and betrayed it," For instance, Napoleon reintroduced slavery in French colonies, revived a system that allowed the rich to dodge conscription in the military and did nothing to advance gender equality.

At the other end of the spectrum have been former right-wing prime minister Dominique de Villepin, an aristocrat who was once fancied as a future President, a passionate collector of Napoleonic memorabilia, and author of several works on the subject. As a Napoleonic enthusiast he tells a different story. Napoleon was a saviour of France. If there had been no Napoleon, the Republic would not have survived. Advocates like de Villepin point to Napoleon’s undoubted achievements: the Civil Code, the Council of State, the Bank of France, the National Audit office, a centralised and coherent administrative system, lycées, universities, centres of advanced learning known as école normale, chambers of commerce, the metric system, and an honours system based on merit (which France has to this day). He restored the Catholic faith as the state faith but allowed for the freedom of religion for other faiths including Protestantism and Judaism. These were ambitions unachieved during the chaos of the revolution. As it is, these Napoleonic institutions continue to function and underpin French society. Indeed, many were copied in countries conquered by Napoleon, such as Italy, Germany and Poland, and laid the foundations for the modern state.

Back in 2014, French politicians and institutions in particular were nervous in marking the 200th anniversary of Napoleon's exile. My neighbours and other French friends remember that the commemorations centred around the Chateau de Fontainebleau, the traditional home of the kings of France and was the scene where Napoleon said farewell to the Old Guard in the "White Horse Courtyard" (la cour du Cheval Blanc) at the Palace of Fontainebleau. (The courtyard has since been renamed the "Courtyard of Goodbyes".) By all accounts the occasion was very moving. The 1814 Treaty of Fontainebleau stripped Napoleon of his powers (but not his title as Emperor of the French) and sent him into exile on Elba. The cost of the Fontainebleau "farewell" and scores of related events over those three weekends was shouldered not by the central government in Paris but by the local château, a historic monument and UNESCO World Heritage site, and the town of Fontainebleau.

While the 200th anniversary of the French Revolution that toppled the monarchy and delivered thousands to death by guillotine was officially celebrated in 1989, Napoleonic anniversaries are neither officially marked nor celebrated. For example, over a decade ago, the president and prime minister - at the time, Jacques Chirac and Dominque de Villepin - boycotted a ceremony marking the 200th anniversary of the battle of Austerlitz, Napoleon's greatest military victory. Both men were known admirers of Napoleon and yet political calculation and optics (as media spin doctors say) stopped them from fully honouring Napoleon’s crowning military glory.

Optics is everything. The division of opinion in France is perhaps best reflected in the fact that, in a city not shy of naming squares and streets after historical figures, there is not a single “Boulevard Napoleon” or “Place Napoleon” in Paris. On the streets of Paris, there are just two statues of Napoleon. One stands beneath the clock tower at Les Invalides (a military hospital), the other atop a column in the Place Vendôme. Napoleon's red marble tomb, in a crypt under the Invalides dome, is magnificent, perhaps because his remains were interred there during France's Second Empire, when his nephew, Napoleon III, was on the throne.

There are no squares, nor places, nor boulevards named for Napoleon but as far as I know there is one narrow street, the rue Bonaparte, running from the Luxembourg Gardens to the River Seine in the old Latin Quarter. And, that, too, is thanks to Napoleon III. For many, and I include myself, it’s a poor return by the city to the man who commissioned some of its most famous monuments, including the Arc de Triomphe and the Pont des Arts over the River Seine.

It's almost as if Napoleon Bonaparte is not part of the national story.

How Napoleon fits into that national story is something historians, French and non-French, have been grappling with ever since Napoleon died. The plain fact is Napoleon divides historians, what precisely he represents is deeply ambiguous and his political character is the subject of heated controversy. It’s hard for historians to sift through archival documents to make informed judgements and still struggle to separate the man from the myth.

One proof of this myth is in his immortality. After Hitler’s death, there was mostly an embarrassed silence; after Stalin’s, little but denunciation. But when Napoleon died on St Helena in 1821, much of Europe and the Americas could not help thinking of itself as a post-Napoleonic generation. His presence haunts the pages of Stendhal and Alfred de Vigny. In a striking and prescient phrase, Chateaubriand prophesied the “despotism of his memory”, a despotism of the fantastical that in many ways made Romanticism possible and that continues to this day.

The raw material for the future Napoleon myth was provided by one of his St Helena confidants, the Comte de las Cases, whose account of conversations with the great man came out shortly after his death and ran in repeated editions throughout the century. De las Cases somehow metamorphosed the erstwhile dictator into a herald of liberty, the emperor into a slayer of dynasties rather than the founder of his own. To the “great man” school of history Napoleon was grist to their mill, and his meteoric rise redefined the meaning of heroism in the modern world.

The Marxists, for all their dislike of great men, grappled endlessly with the meaning of the 18th Brumaire; indeed one of France’s most eminent Marxist historians, George Lefebvre, wrote what arguably remains the finest of all biographies of him.

It was on this already vast Napoleon literature, a rich terrain for the scholar of ideas, that the great Dutch historian Pieter Geyl was lecturing in 1940 when he was arrested and sent to Buchenwald. There he composed what became one of the classics of historiography, a seminal book entitled Napoleon: For and Against, which charted how generations of intellectuals had happily served up one Napoleon after another. Like those poor souls who crowded the lunatic asylums of mid-19th century France convinced that they were Napoleon, generations of historians and novelists simply could not get him out of their head.

The debate runs on today no less intensely than in the past. Post-Second World War Marxists would argue that he was not, in fact, revolutionary at all. Eric Hobsbawm, a notable British Marxist historian, argued that ‘Most-perhaps all- of his ideas were anticipated by the Revolution’ and that Napoleon’s sole legacy was to twist the ideals of the French Revolution, and make them ‘more conservative, hierarchical and authoritarian’.

This contrasts deeply with the view William Doyle holds of Napoleon. Doyle described Bonaparte as ‘the Revolution incarnate’ and saw Bonaparte’s humbling of Europe’s other powers, the ‘Ancien Regimes’, as a necessary precondition for the birth of the modern world. Whatever one thinks of Napoleon’s character, his sharp intellect is difficult to deny. Even Paul Schroeder, one of Napoleon’s most scathing critics, who condemned his conduct of foreign policy as a ‘criminal enterprise’ never denied Napoleon’s intellect. Schroder concluded that Bonaparte ‘had an extraordinary capacity for planning, decision making, memory, work, mastery of detail and leadership’.  The question of whether Napoleon used his genius for the betterment or the detriment of the world, is the heart of the debate which surrounds him.

France's foremost Napoleonic scholar, Jean Tulard, put forward the thesis that Bonaparte was the architect of modern France. "And I would say also pâtissier [a cake and pastry maker] because of the administrative millefeuille that we inherited." Oddly enough, in North America the multilayered mille-feuille cake is called ‘a napoleon.’ Tulard’s works are essential reading of how French historians have come to tackle the question of Napoleon’s legacy. He takes the view that if Napoleon had not crushed a Royalist rebellion and seized power in 1799, the French monarchy and feudalism would have returned, Tulard has written. "Like Cincinnatus in ancient Rome, Napoleon wanted a dictatorship of public salvation. He gets all the power, and, when the project is finished, he returns to his plough." In the event, the old order was never restored in France. When Louis XVIII became emperor in 1814, he served as a constitutional monarch.

In England, until recently the views on Napoleon have traditionally less charitable and more cynical. Professor Christopher Clark, the notable Cambridge University European historian, has written. "Napoleon was not a French patriot - he was first a Corsican and later an imperial figure, a journey in which he bypassed any deep affiliation with the French nation," Clark believed Napoleon’s relationship with the French Revolution is deeply ambivalent.

Did he stabilise the revolutionary state or shut it down mercilessly? Clark believes Napoleon seems to have done both. Napoleon rejected democracy, he suffocated the representative dimension of politics, and he created a culture of courtly display. A month before crowning himself emperor, Napoleon sought approval for establishing an empire from the French in a plebiscite; 3,572,329 voted in favour, 2,567 against. If that landslide resembles an election in North Korea, well, this was no secret ballot. Each ‘yes’ or ‘no’ was recorded, along with the name and address of the voter. Evidently, an overwhelming majority knew which side their baguette was buttered on.

His extravagant coronation in Notre Dame in December 1804 cost 8.5 million francs (€6.5 million or $8.5 million in today's money). He made his brothers, sisters and stepchildren kings, queens, princes and princesses and created a Napoleonic aristocracy numbering 3,500. By any measure, it was a bizarre progression for someone often described as ‘a child of the Revolution.’ By crowning himself emperor, the genuine European kings who surrounded him were not convinced. Always a warrior first, he tried to represent himself as a Caesar, and he wears a Roman toga on the bas-reliefs in his tomb. His coronation crown, a laurel wreath made of gold, sent the same message. His icon, the eagle, was also borrowed from Rome. But Caesar's legitimacy depended on military victories. Ultimately, Napoleon suffered too many defeats.

These days Napoleon the man and his times remain very much in fashion and we are living through something of a new golden age of Napoleonic literature. Those historians who over the past decade or so have had fun denouncing him as the first totalitarian dictator seem to have it all wrong: no angel, to be sure, he ended up doing far more at far less cost than any modern despot. In his widely praised 2014 biography, Napoleon the Great, Andrew Roberts writes: “The ideas that underpin our modern world - meritocracy, equality before the law, property rights, religious toleration, modern secular education, sound finances, and so on - were championed, consolidated, codified and geographically extended by Napoleon. To them he added a rational and efficient local administration, an end to rural banditry, the encouragement of science and the arts, the abolition of feudalism and the greatest codification of laws since the fall of the Roman empire.”

Roberts partly bases his historical judgement on newly released historical documents about Napoleon that were only available in the past decade and has proved to be a boon for all Napoleonic scholars. Newly released 33,000 letters Napoleon wrote that still survive are now used extensively to illustrate the astonishing capacity that Napoleon had for compartmentalising his mind - he laid down the rules for a girls’ boarding school on the eve of the battle of Borodino, for example, and the regulations for Paris’s Comédie-Française while camped in the Kremlin. They also show Napoleon’s extraordinary capacity for micromanaging his empire: he would write to the prefect of Genoa telling him not to allow his mistress into his box at the theatre, and to a corporal of the 13th Line regiment warning him not to drink so much.

For me to have my own perspective on Napoleon is tough. The problem is that nothing with Napoleon is simple, and almost every aspect of his personality is a maddening paradox. He was a military genius who led disastrous campaigns. He was a liberal progressive who reinstated slavery in the French colonies. And take the French Revolution, which came just before Napoleon’s rise to power, his relationship with the French Revolution is deeply ambivalent. Did he stabilise it or shut it down? I agree with those British and French historians who now believe Napoleon seems to have done both.

On the one hand, Napoleon did bring order to a nation that had been drenched in blood in the years after the Revolution. The French people had endured the crackdown known as the 'Reign of Terror', which saw so many marched to the guillotine, as well as political instability, corruption, riots and general violence. Napoleon’s iron will managed to calm the chaos. But he also rubbished some of the core principles of the Revolution. A nation which had boldly brought down the monarchy had to watch as Napoleon crowned himself Emperor, with more power and pageantry than Louis XVI ever had. He also installed his relatives as royals across Europe, creating a new aristocracy. In the words of French politician and author Lionel Jospin, 'He guaranteed some principles of the Revolution and at the same time, changed its course, finished it and betrayed it.'

He also had a feared henchman in the form of Joseph Fouché, who ran a secret police network which instilled dread in the population. Napoleon’s spies were everywhere, stifling political opposition. Dozens of newspapers were suppressed or shut down. Books had to be submitted for approval to the Commission of Revision, which sounds like something straight out of George Orwell. Some would argue Hitler and Stalin followed this playbook perfectly. But here come the contradictions. Napoleon also championed education for all, founding a network of schools. He championed the rights of the Jews. In the territories conquered by Napoleon, laws which kept Jews cooped up in ghettos were abolished. 'I will never accept any proposals that will obligate the Jewish people to leave France,' he once said, 'because to me the Jews are the same as any other citizen in our country.'

He also, crucially, developed the Napoleonic Code, a set of laws which replaced the messy, outdated feudal laws that had been used before. The Napoleonic Code clearly laid out civil laws and due processes, establishing a society based on merit and hard work, rather than privilege. It was rolled out far beyond France, and indisputably helped to modernise Europe. While it certainly had its flaws – women were ignored by its reforms, and were essentially regarded as the property of men – the Napoleonic Code is often brandished as the key evidence for Napoleon’s progressive credentials. In the words of historian Andrew Roberts, author of Napoleon the Great, 'the ideas that underpin our modern world… were championed by Napoleon'.

What about Napoleon’s battlefield exploits? If anything earns comparisons with Hitler, it’s Bonaparte’s apparent appetite for conquest. His forces tore down republics across Europe, and plundered works of art, much like the Nazis would later do. A rampant imperialist, Napoleon gleefully grabbed some of the greatest masterpieces of the Renaissance, and allegedly boasted, 'the whole of Rome is in Paris.'

Napoleon has long enjoyed a stellar reputation as a field commander – his capacities as a military strategist, his ability to read a battle, the painstaking detail with which he made sure that he cold muster a larger force than his adversary or took maximum advantage of the lie of the land – these are stuff of the military legend that has built up around him. It is not without its critics, of course, especially among those who have worked intensively on the later imperial campaigns, in the Peninsula, in Russia, or in the final days of the Empire at Waterloo.

Doubts about his judgment, and allegations of rashness, have been raised in the context of some of his victories, too, most notably, perhaps, at Marengo. But overall his reputation remains largely intact, and his military campaigns have been taught in the curricula of military academies from Saint-Cyr to Sandhurst, alongside such great tacticians as Alexander the Great and Hannibal.

Historians may query his own immodest opinion that his presence on the battlefield was worth an extra forty thousand men to his cause, but it is clear that when he was not present (as he was not for most of the campaign in Spain) the French were wont to struggle. Napoleon understood the value of speed and surprise, but also of structures and loyalties. He reformed the army by introducing the corps system, and he understood military aspirations, rewarding his men with medals and honours; all of which helped ensure that he commanded exceptional levels of personal loyalty from his troops.

Yet, I do find it hard to side with the more staunch defenders of Napoleon who say his reputation as a war monger is to some extent due to British propaganda at the time. They will point out that the Napoleonic Wars, far from being Napoleon’s fault, were just a continuation of previous conflicts that arose thanks to the French Revolution. Napoleon, according to this analysis, inherited a messy situation, and his only real crime was to be very good at defeating enemies on the battlefield. I think that is really pushing things too far. I mean deciding to invade Spain and then Russia were his decisions to invade and conquer.

He was, by any measure, a genius of war. Even his nemesis the Duke of Wellington, when asked who the greatest general of his time was, replied: 'In this age, in past ages, in any age, Napoleon.'

I will qualify all this and agree that Napoleon’s Russian campaign has been rightly held up as a fatal folly which killed so many of his men, but this blunder – epic as it was – should not be compared to Hitler’s wars of evil aggression. Most historians will agree that comparing the two men is horribly flattering to Hitler - a man fuelled by visceral, genocidal hate - and demeaning to Napoleon, who was a product of Enlightenment thinking and left a legacy that in many ways improved Europe.

Napoleon was, of course, no libertarian, and no pluralist. He would tolerate no opposition to his rule, and though it was politicians and civilians who imposed his reforms, the army was never far behind. But comparisons with twentieth-century dictators are well wide of the mark. While he insisted on obedience from those he administered, his ideology was based not on division or hatred, but on administrative efficiency and submission to the law. And the state he believed in remained stubbornly secular.

In Catholic southern Europe, of course, that was not an approach with which it was easy to acquiesce; and disorder, insurgency and partisan attacks can all be counted among the results. But these were principles on which the Emperor would not and could not give ground. If he had beliefs they were not religious or spiritual beliefs, but the secular creed of a man who never forgot that he owed both his military career and his meteoric political rise to the French Revolution, and who never quite abandoned, amidst the monarchical symbolism and the court pomp of the Empire, the republican dreams of his youth. When he claimed, somewhat ambiguously, after the coup of 18 Brumaire that `the Revolution was over’, he almost certainly meant that the principles of 1789 had at last been consummated, and that the continuous cycle of violence of the 1790s could therefore come to an end.

When the Empire was declared in 1804, the wording, again, might seem curious, the French being informed that the `Republic would henceforth be ruled by an Emperor’. Napoleon might be a dictator, but a part at least of him remained a son of the Enlightenment.

The arguments over Napoleon’s status will continue - and that in itself is a testament to the power of one of the most complex figures ever to straddle the world’s stage.

Will the fascination with Napoleon continue for another 200 years?

In France, at least, enthusiasm looks set to diminish. Napoleon and his exploits are scarcely mentioned in French schools anymore. Stéphane Guégan, curator of the Musée d'Orsay in Paris, which, among other First Empire artworks, houses a plaster model of Napoleon dressed as a Roman emperor astride a horse, has described France's fascination with him as ‘a national illness.’ He believes that the people who met him were fascinated by his charm. And today, even the most hostile to Napoleon also face this charm. So there is a difficulty to apprehend the duality of this character. As he wrote, “He was born from the revolution, he extended and finished it, and after 1804 he turns into a despot, a dictator.”

In France, Guégan aptly observes, there is a kind of nostalgia, not for dictatorship but for strong leaders. "Our age is suffering a lack of imagination and political utopia,"

Here I think Guégan is onto something. Napoleon’s stock has always risen or fallen according to the vicissitudes of world events and fortunes of France itself.

In the past, history was the study of great men and women. Today the focus of teaching is on trends, issues and movements. France in 1800 is no longer about Louis XVI and Napoleon Bonaparte. It's about the industrial revolution. Man does not make history. History makes men. Or does it? The study of history makes a mug out of those with such simple ideological driven conceits.

For two hundred years on, the French still cannot agree on whether Napoleon was a hero or a villain as he has swung like a pendulum according to the gravitational pull of historical events and forces.

The question I keep asking of myself and also to French friends with whom I discuss such things is what kind of Napoleon does our generation need?

Thanks for your question.

[hpowellsmith]

From a distant (ie non-romanced) perspective, what did Florin and Rosario think of the Gallatin scandal in 'MC successfully exposes Lady Renaldt' route? Were they shocked, horrified, sympathetic, delighted with gossip material etc.? How did people treat Auguste? On that note, what did the general public think? Did they believe the scandal to be true? A work of disgruntled ex-students? Did Gallatin see a dip in the enrollment rates, or withdrawl of existing students in the following years?

Spoilers below:

Rosario would be really horrified, even if they're not close with the MC. The fact that people were being so mistreated, that someone died, right under their nose... they would feel upset and responsible in a way, because it's their job to look after people. Florin would be a bit annoyed that they didn't realise something was going on - Lady Renaldt comes across as such a law-abiding, prissy person. They'd want to ferret out all the gossip they could, but they'd find it a bit hollow - this is the most major horrible thing they've been around, and even if they're adjacent rather than close to it, they'd be pretty shaken by it, though they wouldn't admit it. Auguste has a really hard time under the most dramatic circumstances: they end up with their Aunt Sidonie as their guardian, and there's doubt cast over whether they'll be able to go to university. Many of their peers would shun them, I imagine. I don't think Rosario would - they're generally pretty kind - but if Rosario was close with the MC, there would absolutely be coolness there. For the general public, a lot of it depends on the MC's decisions in the epilogue, when interacting with the Inspection Board - in some cases you can decide whether Archambault takes over Gallatin, or whether one of the other teachers becomes Head. If Archambault took over, Pascal would have done his best to keep things under the radar, but it wouldn't have fully worked - it was just too much noise and drama. There would have quickly been a reduction of intake, and many students would have just left. That's why Ms Vogel takes over (she's also who reinstates the school if it closes) and changes the "branding" to New Gallatin - she wants to have as much of a break from the past misdeeds as possible, and also her personal politics are such that she wants a more progressive approach. If one of the other teachers took over, it would have been even more difficult to sweep under the rug, though Ms Vogel doesn't come in as Headteacher under those circumstances. I think if a teacher took over who had been in the mines, there would have been more of a sense of "ah good, they're getting justice" from onlookers, but it still would have been a big deal. Neither Hyacinthe nor Trevelyan weren't at the school when it happened, so they don't know a lot, but there are always whispers and gossip. It's perhaps noteable that Hyacinthe and Trevelyan are nowhere near as fancy as pretty much any of the main characters in Creme de la Creme (except perhaps Freddie, but although Freddie's working class and Hyacinthe's lower-middle-class, the upper crust would see them as analogously Lower Than Us). Before the scandal (and this is the case even for a non-scandal route, as Lady R and other Headteachers see the need for moving with the times) they might not have even been accepted to attend. (Note: there is a bit in the current build where Trevelyan talks about not being on scholarship, but that's not actually accurate!)

[artsy-hobbitses]

So aside from prowl, have you decided who get thrown into the functionist universe?

It’s different from the IDW version (this is an AU after all), but I think currently the list includes Skids, HotRod, Whirl, Brainstorm, Nautica, Drift and First Aid.

They were chosen specifically for their roles since this is an official beta experiment of sorts ie. First Aid is the attending medic, Nautica the engineer, Roddy and Drift and Whirl as frontliners/bodyguards for the Brainstorm and Skids collecting data.

[pers-books]

I’m getting sick and tired of having to repeat myself to my current ‘work coach’. Last week and the week before we discussed the letter I was sent following my “Capability to Work Assessment” telling me that I’m capable of “limited work” despite the fact that I cannot, in fact, work in retail when I have panic attacks when I’m face to face with people. (Essentially they assessed me on the basis of my physical health, despite the fact that’s NOT why I’ve been ‘signed off’ work and supplied with Fit Notes since last summer!) I’ve told this fact to this woman twice. And I STILL had to repeat myself this week for a third fucking time because she’s not paying attention. 

She told me that Universal Credit wouldn’t accept my mental health issues as a reason not to work when I hadn’t mentioned it before. I pointed out it’s been an issue since April 2020 and my “Journal” (ie online UC account) is literally littered with requests for work coaches to ring me rather than make me attend an in-person appointment because I have panic attacks when f2f with people so how could they possibly NOT know? It’s literally there in black and white on multiple journal entries!

So in two weeks time she’ll ring me back and I’ll have a joint phone call with her and a “disability work coach” and in the interim she’ll talk to her line manager. 

I mean, Jesus fucking Christ, I know the Tories will literally send people with terminal illness to work rather than pay them UC or the disability living allowance, but this is utter fucking bullshit AND IT MAKES MY MENTAL HEALTH WORSE! 

Fucking morons!

[imfemalewarrior]

Woah, you were a microbiologist? That's actually my college major! (I'm just a freshman but still lol) Would you mind giving me any tips you might have for bio/microbio, or anything you'd wanted to know at the time? If not that's okay!! I hope you have a good day :D

Ya! My undergrad thesis was in microbiology (specifically microbial fuel cells).

So I don't know how ur university works or if you have to write an undergrad thesis or do research to get ur undergrad degree (my institution/major required us to do a research project and write a thesis to graduate). So my advice is gonna be closer to this experience but hopefully that will still be helpful!

So in my freshman year I tried to join a microbiology lab but looking back I don't think I was ready to do that; i was ready during my junior year tho. And that's ok! So maybe give yourself freshman year to adjust to what college life and workload is like.

You can also use your freshman year to figure out what career path you want (do you want to go to grad school or industry or government work? Applied research or pure research? What areas of microbiology interest you, medicinal, energy, water treatment, greenhouse gas sequestering, fuel generation? Which ones do you want to avoid at all costs?) If you want to go to grad school or keep it as an option focus on research experiences in microbio labs and not internships.

Figure out who ur academic advisor is and develop a good professional relationship with them. They will help you stay on track with classes for graduation and now also you have someone who knows you that you can ask for rec letters.

Go to office hours!!! More professional relationships with professors and thus better rec letters.

Approach professors about their research and labs and talk to them about joining as an undergrad researcher but I don't recommend doing this is freshman year bc of what I already said. Freshman year search microbio stuff on google scholar and read research papers to learn what's out there in current research, especially recent publications!

See what clubs are available for professional development and attend those. I attended women in engineering stuff and it was helpful to me when I was starting out.

See what resume writing resources are available and ask for their help writing a resume (freshman year it's ok to have high school stuff on ur resume but ur first year at college try to do stuff that you can replace high school stuff with on ur resume, and at the end of each semester update ur resume with what classes you took during that semester to help reflect ur developed skills to ppl you send the resume to or anything you apply to that requires a resume). Also write a CV as those can include hobbies and what skills you have from those hobbies

I also do recommend studying abroad if at all possible as that was something people were extremely interested in when I was applying for internships before I figured out "i want to go to grad school" and switched tactics with the help and advice of my academic advisor (hence why you need to figure out who they are and see them at the beginning and end of every semester to make sure your schedule is correct and you're on track with everything)

Work with your classmates. Attend every class you are physically fit to attend (ie if ur sick stay home if ur physically well go to class and sit at the front ur teacher will notice you attend class) turn in all ur hw bc these are the things that show you pay attention and care about the class. Also attending office hours.

-FemaleWarrior

[mithrilwren]

If you don't mind doing more than one for me, "Hypothermia"? ✨

I went to bed before I could answer this, but I’ll do so now! 

“Hypothermia” is one of my (relatively) more recent WIPs, in that I started it last October (I haven’t had time to write in a while, wehhh). It’s a Shadowgast fic set in the same universe as The Ghost on the Shore, which I wrote for Fjorclay week last spring/summer: ie. the incredibly specific setting of “Canadian mid-2000′s modern-ish AU”. In The Ghost on the Shore, Caleb’s busy preparing a conference paper in advanced mathematics (hence being a very reluctant participant in the M9′s camping trip), and this fic takes place about six months after that conference, over the course of which Caleb accidentally wandered into the wrong room and ended up attending the dissertation of a mysterious physics post-grad... I think you can guess where this is going :) 

“Hypothermia” centres around another M9 outdoor excursion: ice fishing. Having befriended Caleb at the conference, Essek is up north visiting the crew, and a very unwilling participant in the whole ordeal. Things only get worse when the ice isn’t quite as thick as it first appeared...

(This premise is honestly way funnier because I had no idea that Essek would end up stationed in Aeor at the time of writing. A horrible prophecy, at least for Essek, haha.)

Caleb has never, in their six months of acquaintance, seen Essek as miserable as he is now. 

The styrofoam cup shudders between his hands, shoulders quaking beneath purple wool. Little beads of hot chocolate speckle his black gloves like splattered mud. It’s proof of exactly how cold it is that Essek doesn’t put the drink down for even a moment to wipe the spillage away. Instead, he clings to the cup as a dying man would his last mouthful of water, like it’s all that stands between him and the abyss. Knees bouncing up and down, he stares sourly at the fire, admonishing it with every glare for not serving its promised duty in keeping him warm.

Caleb hides a small smile behind his thick mitts as he takes a sip from his own cup. The packaged stuff is grainy, and too thin - nothing like the bubbling pot of chocolate, thick with nutmeg and creamy milk, that would have graced his mother’s stove - but all the same, it goes down hot, and that’s more important than flavour in their current situation.

“I should never have agreed to this,” Essek grumbles for the fourth time in an hour, but any bite is lost in the chattering of teeth. Though Caleb is sympathetic to the torture of being dragged out of a comfortable space (preferably, the university library) and into the unforgiving wild (resentfully, any number of camping trips), he can’t help but find his abject misery endearing. For someone usually so self-possessed, even a hint of discomfort goes a long way.