#if i missed anything from the first lost draft im going to cry a little

[definitelynotshouting]

Hi! This is the anon that binged your fic a few days ago! I just got the time to read the newest chapter and I am SO sticking around to find out where this story goes. As someone who’s struggled with mental health I’m able to connect with Grian so well and that only doubles the desire I have to see him flourish and overcome these struggles. The way you write description is so inspiring too; I’ve learned several words since reading! I didn’t know anything about the hunger au when I started so some of the world building was a little lost on me at first, but as I continued it made a lot more sense very quickly! Amazing work, I’m very excited to see where it ends up :)

- binge reader

ANONNNN THIS IS SO INSANELY SWEET THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR SENDING THIS ASK,,, i was thinking abt this earlier today but i rlly am writing this story primarily for all the recovery girlies out there. My little way of holding everyone's hand and saying its gonna be okay, actually, even if it gets so hard you want to lie down and cry forever. Mental health strugglers rise UP we are OUT HERE we are GOING TO MAKE IT!!!!!!!!!

Im really flattered you enjoy my descriptions, its something i think im most proud of in my writing :] smth about finding the perfect word to help paint an incredibly vivid picture really appeals to the autism in my brain, although i do frequently worry i might be going a bit,,,, overboard kdsbkdnekdk

and yeah, this is admittedly a rough draft of the story-- its missing quite a bit of connective tissue at the start, which is mostly bc i genuinely assumed only a handful of people already familiar with the world would pick it up and see it. In the hypothetical future polished version of this fic, i'd want to make the worldbuilding a bit more concrete right from the start-- i think its very easy to tell that im still sorta worldbuilding as i go, and there are definitely details i'd want to put front and center right away :] nonetheless, im pretty proud of how its shaping up, considering when i posted the first two chapters i had NO CLUE where it was going 😂😂😂😂

Im very, very happy so many people have gotten into the fic and its worldbuilding. Its a truly indescribable feeling when yall come into my inbox and tell me stuff like this ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️ i hope you continue to enjoy the fic, and im really happy you feel seen by it-- that means a lot for me to hear :]

[science-lings]

Elixirs and Enchantments: A Totally Comprehensive Fictional Medical Study

So, there are like 11 different kinds of potions in botw and I have a lot of thoughts about them and their medical properties to achieve their magical abilities. Also this is my second try at this because my computer died the first time and deleted the entire post when it was almost done. I’ve worked on this for my own benefit for fics and stuff and it greatly influenced my depiction of Wild as a potion maker/ witch type but it applies to the botw world as a whole. 

Types of Elixirs:

Hearty: Basic healing potion, rapidly speeds up cell regeneration on physical wounds and acts as a painkiller. Tends to leave scars. Doesn’t do much when it comes to illnesses but can help infections and most types of pain, you can take a quick sip and your headache will go away, but when it is used for more major injuries it tends to leave behind a dull ache and scarring. Tastes metallic, like blood, but also a little sour, not really gross but just weird. 

Stamina (and Enduring): Instantly revitalizes and oxygenizes blood and muscle cells which prevents exhaustion. This prevents hyperventilating and is a good first treatment after asphyxiation. Also good for stabilizing heart rate and breathing after extreme physical exertion. Tastes strongly herbal and earthy. 

Chilly: Fever reducer, treatment for heatstroke and things caused by overheating. Can be applied topically for burns and to prevent (and treat) sunburn. Can also be applied topically to numb certain areas. Tastes like menthol, or just extremely minty. Makes it feel cold to breathe and that part of it takes a while to wear off. It also messes with how other things taste, especially sweet things.  

Warm: Prevents and treats frostbite and hypothermia, though if it’s for treatment then it’s vital to use a weak elixir to make sure that the persons core temperature doesn’t rise too fast and should be combined with other gradual warming techniques, like blankets, skin contact, and proximity to a fire. Can be applied topically to relax muscles and is often used for massages and taking care of cramps and joint pain. Tastes incredibly spicy but the sensation only lasts a few seconds. Like eating a full spoonful of wasabi but it cools down quick and takes effect pretty fast too. 

Electric: Enhances the bodies natural tolerance for electricity and gives the body a natural charge so that when something tries to shock it, it subconsciously retaliates with an opposite charge. Can also be used to shock the nervous system as a natural defibrillator and to treat paralyzing poisons. Tastes like static and rain. Gives the mouth feeling of poprocks. 

Fireproof: Severe body temperature reducer, keeps skin from spontaneously catching fire like really intense sunscreen. Should not be used outside of places that are not literally on fire. It also toughens the skin and lowers the bodies ability to sense temperature which makes it good at treating severe burns. Tastes very burnt yet very cold. Also tastes like rocks and is pretty chalky. It instantly dries your mouth. 

Stealth: Slows down heart rate, good for panic attacks and can act like a sleep aid. It also increases focus and awareness of surroundings and would be a pretty good treatment for ADHD tbh. In the game you still have to try to be stealthy even with the elixir so it’s not like a magical ‘cure’, but it does help a person be more aware of themselves so they are able to be sneaky. Tastes very floral and cool, like an earthy taste mixed with a grandmothers perfume. It also glows in the dark. 

Speedy: Kind of the opposite of stealth elixirs, speeds up heart rate and gives a surprisingly long lasting artificial adrenaline rush, good for keeping someone awake and preventing them from flatlining. Tastes super sour, worse than a liquified warhead. It’s impossible not to make a face when drinking it. They are the closest thing there is to recreational drugs if the rushroom guy is anything to go by...

Attack: Enhances muscle strength and is good for when you need to move unnecessarily big things, like boulders. Good for a quick boost of buffness and to aid in gradual muscle growth. As it aids in gaining muscle, it’s good for people recovering from major illnesses and major injuries and is often used in physical therapy. Also causes a boost in testosterone and thus the urge to fight things. Tastes like a shitty protein shake, like it’s trying so hard to be chocolate but its just too bitter and not sweet enough.  

Defense: Enhances skin and muscle durability, but it also works like that weird slime that is normal when you touch it but solidifies when you punch it. Like you wouldn’t know if someone took the elixir if they just gave you a handshake but if you punched them it would be like punching a rock. The elixir can be used topically on leather and animal pelts and is often used to enhance armor. You can also bathe your cat in it safely to make them harder to injure so you don’t have to worry when they disappear for a day and come back looking like they’ve been in a hurricane. Tastes like machine oil and is better taken topically or put in a lotion bottle to add to your bathing routine. Can be a little stinky though. 

Fairy: In game fairy tonics are said to be powerful but don’t exactly live up to it. I like to think that they’re more powerful that hearty elixirs in that they’re faster, can deal with illness, can practically revive someone from deaths door and leave much less scarring. Also they taste sweet like candy and come in fun little bottles. They taste like artificial fruit flavors, like watermelon and blue raspberry and banana and all that, but it’s hard to tell exactly what fake fruit it is. 

other medical/ enchantment hcs below the cut

Okay so we need to talk about Chuchu jellies. In TP they act the same as potions and Link can and will eat them. I don’t like that. They’re purely topical and you should not eat them but Link is weird and I guess he’s allowed to...

The normal blue chuchu jelly is a natural anti-sceptic and gentle sanitizer that can be applied to open wounds. Hear me out, chuchu’s come right out of the ground and show no evidence of being dirty so like they have to be naturally resistant to dirt and germs. It can also be combined with the other chuchu jellies so that they’re diluted enough to not explode in elemental power and instead can be used like the topical version of the potion that is it’s elemental equivalent. You can also add some herbs to help out, but in a pinch just the jelly mixture is good enough. 

Let’s also talk about gemstones, the main non-edible houses of natural magic. The Gerudo are the most skilled at making things with them, everything from adding them to weapons and clothes, to something as complex as spa equipment like a sauna, to something as simple as enchanted jewelry. All the gems on their clothes aren’t just for show, they also help them live their best lives in the incredible heat in the middle of the desert. There are also gems in the walls of the entire city, keeping it comfortably cool in the day and moderately warm in the night. 

Talking about the Gerudo, they seem some of the most magically inclined of the Hyrulian races, at least in botw, I can see them utilizing the natural magic in plants to make everything from cosmetics to fabric. Most clothes are not magically enchanted and are instead their design is what makes them so useful but some still have enchantment as their main source of helpfulness. Mostly the Gerudo sets and the Dark Link set and the barbarian set. (Also the dlc clothes and the amiibo clothes, their boosts are way to specific to not be caused by magic) 

The elemental powered weapons are odd, they don’t really have an origin or a lore reason for existing, they seem to be powered by their respective gemstones on their hilts but its hard to tell and it’s hard to tell who made them. They’re different than any of the races we know, like drastically, so maybe before the calamity there were more magical Hylians who made them but have since gone extinct? Or they can only make elemental arrows now... I’m pretty sure that in some cases when a shop runs out of elemental arrows they tell you that they’ll go find some more rather than make them so perhaps there’s a secret maker of magic arrows that many shops source from? I think it’s the lady from Gerudo Town, I’m pretty sure she’s the only shopkeeper that both has all the types of arrows and is stated to make them? that would lead to my theory of the Gerudo being the most magically gifted post calamity but who knows.

In any case, a fire powered weapon could easily be used to cauterize wounds and I’m sure that if you poked someone with an electric spear then it would act like a defibrillator. 

[poppysmc]

I Don't Know How You Do It But I'm Forever Ruined

Notes: This has been sitting in my drafts for so so long, unfinished with a different song and Im just obsessed with this song right now so I thought I'd go ahead and post it.. sorry for the mistakes I don't have a beta so they're all mine. I'm just slowly getting back to writing again, please be patient with me. ❤️

Song: Off my face - Justin Bieber

(One shot)

Last and certainly not the least…. Ms. Morgan Hughes, she’ll be gracing us with her angelic voice, singing… uhh… Off my face? Thomas reads the cue cards, slightly puzzled, he thought Morgan would be doing stand-up, he and Morgan’s posse endured long nights of practicing her stand-up routine and now she’s just gonna sing, it’s not even vetted on.

He glances to the side, silently confirming if it was right. Morgan nods and smiles nervously. He in turn smiles back, giving an encouraging thumbs up and a whisper of ‘good luck’ as she takes to the stage.

Some of the audience chuckled at the name choice, adding to the ever growing lump lodged in her throat. This is definitely not her best idea and before she could go ranting about the title, some of her friends clapped and cheered, giving her a slight boost of confidence.

She wrote thet a few months ago, absently plucking at the guitar strings. She’s got the same few chords stuck in her head for week. Only god knows how she pulled the lyrics out of her muddled brain.

How does one go about sharing her feelings for someone who has no idea? Said someone sitting front and center with a scowl, sitting next to her parents. She has no idea she wrote it for her, she sighs in relief.

For a split second she could see Poppy’s attention snap up to her, smirking and raising her eyebrow in question. Morgan rolls her eyes at her and settled into her chair and just like Poppy’s face never moved, her scowl was back in place, listening to Chloe rant about her talent to her right.

She starts plucking out the intro, it’s now or never.

One touch and you got me stoned

Higher than I’ve ever known

You call the shots and I’ll follow

Sunrise but the night’s still young

No words but we’re speaking tongues

If you let me I might say too much

Sometimes people just enter your life and burrow themselves so deep into it that for the life of you, you couldn't remember when it all started. This case was different, Morgan could vividly remember a day it all changed, how it became harder for her to even look Poppy in the eye for more than a few seconds. How her warm touch roughly pulling her back to the argument now seemed to burn through her sleeves, pressure slightly softer. She used to meet her hot gaze, faces only inches apart spitting out vicious insults without thinking much, now she didn’t have the same fire in her veins she seemed to have arguing with Poppy.

The need to antagonize her fizzled into something else, a warmth that threatens to overtake her made itself a home in her chest.

---------------

Morgan wanted to stay home, as much as she enjoyed parties, it wasn’t something she wanted to do regularly. Sometimes it gets a little too much to handle, the music felt too loud, the people got too close, the eyes on her felt stifling. She wanted to be free just this one night out of expectant looks but Zoey is too convincing, her puppy dog eyes are too powerful for a mere mortal like herself. She made a condition to just be at the party no over the top expensive clothes, just herself.

“I’ll come but just to be your glorified chauffer.” She dresses herself in something simple, a pair of black pants and flannel. “I just want to be invisible this one night, Zo.”

“Fine by me, but if your fashion choices end up splashed all over The T tomorrow don’t come crying to me.” Zoey shakes her head, the slight dig on her wardrobe is softened by a thankful grin.

“You get dragged on The T once, and no one lets you live it down.”

“Because I’m pretty certain I said don’t go out in that, it’s suicide. So yeah I would never let it go, you wore socks with your flip-flops and had the audacity to show yourself in public.”

“It’s not even my fault, sunny ran out the door. I had no time to check what I was wearing."

“You’ll never learn. Whatever will you do without me?” Zoey smirks and shakes her head affectionately. "Stop stalling and let’s go. My carriage awaits dear chauffer.”

“Yeah, yeah. Please allow me to escort you down, boss.” Morgan bumps her shoulders with Zoey as she passes by to grab her jacket. She opens the door and offers her arm, Zoey laughs and loops her arms around hers.

The party was already in full swing once they arrived. The music was blaring; the bass makes Morgan’s chest thump along erratically with every beat. “Text me, okay? I’ll make myself scarce.”

“Sure. Thanks for driving.” Zoey winks and beelines for the bar. In a few seconds she loses sight of her.

Morgan trudges through the house, the crowd gradually thins as she makes her way farther to the back. She exhales in relief finally free of the maze of drunk students with no boundaries, nobody seemed to pay attention to her, thank god for the dim lighting. The backdoor swings open, she breathes in the crisp night air. The door shuts and party fades into muffled thumps. She sat on the porch steps, her side leaning against the banister, oblivious to the pair of eyes quietly observing her.

After a minute of silence, Morgan sucked air through her clenched teeth, surprised at hearing someone pointedly clearing their throat behind her. The rate in which her head whipped back almost made her dizzy. When she recognizes who the person was, she could already feel the headache coming through, she almost swallows her tongue in disbelief. Of all the people she didn’t want to see her tonight was Poppy, yet here she was, alone with her.

“What are you doing back here?” Poppy asked, voice devoid of any venom just genuinely curious.

“Do I need permission to be? Who made you queen?” Morgan scoffs, the slight bite in her voice comes through and makes Poppy smirk.

“Belvoire.” Poppy cheekily answers, earning an undignified snort from Morgan. The slight tension momentarily forgotten.

“Should have seen that coming.”

“The party’s raging inside and little miss newbie sits here. What are you doing, really?” Poppy asks not unkindly, voice tinged with concern and curiosity.

“I could ask the same to you.”

“I asked first.” Poppy frowns impatiently.

Morgan sighs, opting to just answer just to avoid trouble. She didn’t have the energy to make up excuses nor to argue. “I don’t feel like partying today. I’m just waiting for Zoey to get flat out drunk and drive her home. My turn.”

“It’s-  It’s overwhelming inside. I just want to be alone for a while.” The honesty in Poppy’s answer momentarily throws her off.

“Do you want me to go?” Morgan asks, feeling like she’s intruding. This must be the longest record they ever had being civil to one another, actually speaking without the sarcastic comments and the insults. It makes her feel out of place and awkward.

“You could do whatever you want. I’m not the queen of anything right now.” Right, cause technically it's Chloe. There’s something in her tone that makes Morgan’s heart clench, yet she shrugs it off as the bass from the party. To Morgan’s never ending surprise, the blonde pats the spot next to her on the bench. “The floor is filthy.” Poppy clarifies when she makes no move to stand. A disarming smile crosses her face, Morgan guessed her hesitation must have been showing.

Morgan stands and dusts herself off. “Who are you and what have you done to Poppy?” She asks with a grateful smile, sitting down the furthest she could from the other girl.

“I have half the mind to kick you off this bench.” Poppy grumbles.

“There she is.”

Poppy huffs out a half laugh and after that there’s just silence. After a while she could see the slight tremble in Poppy’s hand in her periphery. She wordlessly shrugs off the coat she’s wearing and offers it to the other girl.

“What?” Poppy blinks, eying her coat suspiciously, making Morgan chuckle in disbelief.

“You’re cold. Take it or go inside.”

“Fine.” Poppy slips on the offered garment, appreciating the warmth it gave to her cold limbs. She wasn’t thinking while she burrowed herself further, letting Morgan’s scent envelope her. She stared at Morgan, feeling guilty for a moment. She moves closer, Morgan shivers when their shoulders touched. "Thanks." Poppy whispers, if it wasn't for their proximity, Morgan might have missed it. She hoped the shadows hid the small smile spreading to her lips.

“I’m sorry for taking your coat. I just couldn’t go back inside. I-” Poppy trails off, breaking her gaze away and staring farther up the yard.

“It’s okay, I offered. You don’t have to explain anything.” Morgan understood, after today everything changed, she lost her spot to one of her friends. Morgan was somewhat surprised that instead of Poppy's explosive anger, she opted to just sit here and mope.

She jumps a little when her phone vibrates in her pocket, she could see Poppy smirk in the corner of her eye.

"Jumpy."

She reads the text and taps a reply, frowning. She turns to Poppy. She doesn't even know why she's explaining but it felt wrong to just go without saying anything. A part of her wanted to make this moment stretch a little longer, so she hesitates.

“Apparently Zoey doesn’t need me to drive her back. So... I guess I'll head back home." Morgan stands not having an excuse to stay longer and makes her way to the door, hands hovering over the door knob to open it but not before doing something stupid like asking her so called enemy if she wanted to drive around for a while.

“So… Do you still want company? We could drive around for a while?” Morgan mentally chastises herself for the suggestion. Of course Poppy would say no it’s not like she-

Morgan looks back at Poppy, she sees her worrying her bottom lip between her teeth in thought. Morgan’s gaze flickers down to her lips, wondering if they’re as soft as they looked. The moment passed and she breaks her gaze away just as Poppy decided.

“Sure but let me just get my stuff.” Poppy stands and makes her way to the door, Morgan standing motionless, hand over the handle. She reaches for it, her fingertips grazing Morgan’s, the slight static made her pull her hand away abruptly.

“Sorry.” Morgan breaks through her short circuited brain and moves to hold the door open for Poppy.  “I’ll wait for you out front.” Morgan makes her way back through the crowd, her mind reeling at what happened back there and what mess she got herself into.

---------------

She continued singing, her eyes accidentally meeting Poppy’s gaze again, her scowl was replaced by an unreadable expression, attention now focused solely on her and Morgan almost faltered. She breaks eye contact and stares at the back wall, ignoring the burning gaze upon her from those familiar eyes.

Your touch blurred my vision

It’s your world and I’m just in it

Even sober I’m not thinking straight

Cause I’m off my face in love with you

I’m out my head so into you

And I don’t know how you do it

But I’m forever ruined by you

-----------------------

The sound of the door opening breaks Morgan out of her deep thoughts. She could see Poppy walking towards her with a sour expression, she's still wearing Morgan's coat.

“What happened to you?” Morgan’s warm hands reaching out to her, settling comfortably on her shoulder. Poppy stares at her hands, she pulls it away like she’s been burned.

“Just drive.” Poppy mumbles, trying hard to be composed but failing.

“Where to?” Morgan pretends not to notice Poppy's agitation, barely glancing at her so she won't feel uncomfortable. She unlocks her car slipping inside while Poppy stares at the abomination in front of her.

“I don’t want to sound ungrateful but your truck is… I don’t know how to say it without offending you? But maybe it could use a good wash? Like you drove through mud to get here. I don’t know, maybe we could go to a carwash, my treat.”

"That’s about the rudest thing anyone’s ever said to me, and you said a lot of insulting things before." Morgan rolls her eyes. “She doesn’t mean that Betty, you just got a little mud on you.” She murmurs quietly.

“You named your car… Betty?”

“What? No I didn’t.” Morgan could see Poppy’s amused smirk even in her periphery.

“You’re such a dork.” Poppy can’t help but laugh at her mortified expression.

Morgan distracts herself from the rapidly rising heat on her neck by fiddling with the radio before driving off. The sweet sound of the guitar filtered through the car and she smiles triumphantly, previous embarrassment pushed to the back of her mind. She doesn't notice Poppy's expression soften.

Morgan drives her car through the carwash. They watched the water and the soap assault her car, the material of the brushes made a repetitive sound along with one of her favourite songs. Poppy had her seat leaned back, watching the machine rid the car of dust and mud. There was something mildly intimate about it, Morgan could move her right hand then they would be grazing Poppy’s, she could do it, she wanted to do it. But all she could manage was a slight twitch in her pinky, her hand doesn't move any closer.

“Do you ever feel like there’s a hundred people around you in a room, yet you feel alone?” Poppy breaks the silence, tilting her head slightly to the left to look at Morgan.

“Sometimes, yeah. Sometimes people may be looking at you yet feel as if their staring right through you, like your nothing. Oh! Like a ghost.” This makes Poppy chuckle.

“Yeah like that. It would have been easier if we were ghosts at least then you know why.”

“Did you feel like that back at the party?” Morgan wanted to say how that would have been impossible that no one could have seen her, she’s seeing her now. She wondered how could anyone ever take their eyes of her, she always seemed to be the brightest thing in any room she entered and now even in this dingy carwash she looked so radiant. How sometimes she thinks that she picks fights with her just for a chance to be bathed in her light. Thoughts she doesn't think would ever cross her mind trickled slowly and became a raging river. Now that she found herself here with her, without anything familiar to fall back on, anything just to distract herself out of her dangerous thoughts.

“Yeah, I don’t know. It was easier to be alone than surrounded but feeling alone. Do you get it? At least I know, I chose to be alone.”

“I get it.” If she had the ability to say more she would have but these few pathetic words are all she could manage. This time her hand reaches to squeeze Poppy’s. A quiet comfort to reinforce her words, she understood.

“Thank you.”

Whatever atmosphere they created in that moment fell apart when Morgan had to move her car forward and exited the wash.

“Where to now?”

“Your turn to choose.” Poppy mumbles, still staring blankly outside.

“Okay, I know a place. You're gonna love it."

“I’m not going to let you pick anymore.” Poppy complains, standing in front a fluorescent lit diner. It almost glowed but in a weird way, like a bat signal for the weary.

“Hey! They make the best food.” Morgan steps forward and drags her companion along when she hesitated.

Warmth and the ambient sound of cutlery grazing the plates makes Morgan smile. She always came here when she’s feeling lonely, missing her parents, their farm or when she’s stressed from school, for trying to fit in like a robot.

“Come. Don’t just stand there.” Morgan looks back at Poppy, her breath caught in her throat. Poppy looked ethereal against the most basic place there ever is. If you said diners were some kind of portal to somewhere else she’d accept it and move on, for she looked like she existed out of place, alien, untouchable as she was beautiful. For the second time this day her gaze flickers to Poppy’s lips, she realizes that she’s saying something and Morgan’s mortified of being caught staring like a fool.

“What? Is something on my face?” Poppy is thankfully oblivious.

“No, it’s perfect.” Morgan quietly whispers while Poppy checks herself in the diner’s window, her words falling into deaf ears.

Morgan balls up pieces of her straw paper places it over some torn up tissues, stacked together. She’s fidgeting under Poppy’s presence; she doesn’t know what to do with her hands.

She's startled when Poppy lightly grasps her hands stopping it from tearing up another piece of paper. It’s been minutes of watching Morgan tear up even rectangles of several tissues, a girl could only take so much.

“You’re making a mess.” Poppy chastises her like a child. She would have laughed but Poppy still hasn’t let go of her hand, it’s making her blush like an idiot.

“Sorry. It’s just that the food is taking a while huh?” Morgan stealthily tries to take her hand back but Poppy only holds it tighter. When they're not arguing, Morgan found that she doesn't know how else to act around her.

“Stop tearing paper like confetti.”

“Sorry.” Morgan sheepishly apologizes and Poppy lets go of her hand, hiding hers under the table, flexing it, she could still feel the warmth of her hand in hers.

The food arrives and Morgan smiles widely. Poppy stares, pretending she's interested in what food Morgan ordered. She admits to herself that for all the times she stared at her she never noticed how beautiful Morgan’s smile was. Arguing doesn't leave one space to insert a smile. It made her heart skip, imagining how it would be like if it was directed at her.

She almost misses Morgan stealing a fry off her plate. “Hey! If you wanted some you should have bought your own or at least politely asked.” Poppy mock glares at her companion, taking one of the crumpled balls and flicking it, hitting Morgan right between the eyes. They watched as the paper landed right into Morgan’s half empty milkshake glass.

"Your face!" Poppy laughs, wishing she could have captured it on camera.

Morgan found that she liked Poppy's laugh when it was genuine. “You better buy me another. You ruined mine.”

“What? It’s almost all gone anyway. All the needless calories you’re consuming will bite you in the ass someday.”

“I’ll take my chances.”

“Just have the rest of mine.” Poppy slides over her milkshake, Morgan grins and takes a sip right into Poppy’s straw. Poppy noticed first, eyes widening. Did She just… A revolting question crossed her mind, how would ‘Morgan’s lips feel like pressed to mine.’ Shes never felt jealous of a piece of plastic before in her life.

Morgan freezes when she realized what she’s done. She just had an indirect kiss with Poppy through the straw. “Sorry. I got excited.”

Poppy opens a new straw for her water, blowing the other end right into Morgans face, another bulls eye, she’s killing it. “Don’t overthink it.” She dismisses the act but her brain does summersaults inside her skull.

They finished eating, the last few of Poppy’s fries stolen right under her nose. She pretends she doesn’t see her sneaking a few of the fries away, she just lets her. Mind preoccupied with important things like Morgan’s lips.

------------------

Can’t sleep ‘cause I’m way too buzzed

Too late now you’re in my blood

I don’t hate the way you keep me up

Your touch blurred my vision

It’s your world and I’m just in it

Even sober I’m not thinking straight

Even if she doesn't look or at least tries her hardest not to, she could feel Poppy's gaze on her, burning, willing her eyes to look back. There's something wildly intimate about singing a song to someone and in the sea of strangers you know it's just for them. No matter how many people sang it, to another, to themselves or just for the heck of it, the song only belongs to the person you made it for. Just for her. They could never feel the way she felt when she wrote it, how her feelings were entwined with every word.

In her periphery she could see Poppy stand and make excuses to her parents. She left, she didn't see where she went, she doesn't dare look anywhere near where she was, she's a coward like that. All she could feel is disappointment. It takes everything in her not to show it on her face. Was it too late to change her talent to stand up?

----------------------------------

"Come on Poppy, pick a place already. I've been driving around for hours! People will think we're stalking someone around here." Morgan whines in the driver seat taking yet another turn around the block.

"It's been exactly 20 minutes. You're such a baby." Poppy looks at her phone for any places that might still be open around this time. "Turn right, that's not right. Right! Not left."

"Great, now were going in circles. Pull over."  Poppy grumbles.

"What?" Morgan looks confused for a moment but does what she’s told anyway, parking along the street.

"Get out."  Poppy moves to exit the car.

"What are you..?"

"I'm not gonna hijack your car, just let me drive. You suck at following directions."

"...."

They switch seats, Morgan slumps and mopes in hers. Poppy fights back a smile.

“Would you look at that it only took 2 minutes.” Poppy smiles smugly.

“I did all the navigating you only had to turn once.” Morgan complains, getting out of the car and looking around the parking lot. “What the hell Poppy, a 711? You could have told me, I could have turned anywhere and found one.”

“Like hell you could. You don’t even know your left from your right.” Poppy laughs at Morgan’s offended expression. They walked in, shoulders brushing together and Morgan shivers, insisting to herself that it’s because it’s cold.

Poppy smiles, victoriously pulling out what they came here for out of the fridge.

“A freaking capri sun? We drove all the way here for that?” Morgan complains, ready to throttle Poppy. Though there’s something endearing in her expression, that proud smile for finding something she was looking for.

“Just go find something you want.” Poppy shoos her away, grabbing a few more pouches of juice. She shakes her head and walks off in search of snacks.

Morgan comes back with an armful of sweets and chips.

“We just ate. What are you doing? Take these back, I won't buy you all these.”

“You said something I like. I like them all. Come on aren't you rich?” Morgan dumps her haul in the counter, the cashier looking back and forth from them, looking for a sign that it’s okay to scan the items.

“Are you just an overgrown kid or what?”

“Pop, you just bought a juice in a pouch, you have no right to judge me.”

“Fine.”

Morgan carries three bags worth of snacks back to the car, Poppy not attempting to lift a finger just because she paid.

“Your turn. Pick a place.”

Minutes later they're on a cliff overlooking the city. Fading notes from a song playing in Morgan’s car filtered to the back.

“I'm surprised you didn't get lost.”

“I don't suck at directions. You're the one that sucked at giving them.” Morgan says in self-defence. She unlatches the back so they could sit on it, holding Poppy’s waist, helping her up. If Poppy noticed her hands shake, she didn’t say anything. They sat closer together, leaning against the side. She could feel the cold seeping into her shirt, making her shiver. Poppy notices and moves to take Morgan's coat off.

“No. Keep it on.” Morgan stops her, cold hands over equally cold ones.

“But you're cold.”

“I'm not.” Morgan attempts to refute it but her hands are freezing.

“I can see your teeth chattering.”

“I like it on you.” She smiles softly.

“What?”

“I don't want you to be cold. Just take it, don’t be stubborn.”

“If you speak of this to anyone, I would personally kill you in your sleep.”

“Why would you do- oh.” Morgan stared in confusion, then realization.

Poppy moved to sit in the space between her legs, leaning her back into Morgan, taking her hands and wrapping them to her waist. Her hands rubbing over Morgan's freezing ones. To say that she was now warm was an understatement, she was burning from the blush that overtook her body.

“If you wanted to be near me so bad you could've just asked.” Morgan grins, chin propped on Poppy's shoulder.

Poppy huffs and attempts to get up. Morgan's arms stop her, wrapping tighter, keeping her in place. “Don't move, I might freeze to death.”

“That's what I thought.”

They had a toast with the Capri sun pouches, laughing at the ridiculousness of it all. They sat there talking for hours, the company was too enjoyable to give in to exhaustion or cold.

From the time they were talking Poppy shifted her position, now sitting on Morgan's lap, staring up at her while she told a story about their farm animals, making her scrunch her nose in disgust at one of her retellings.

They stared at the sky surprised to see the day chasing the night away. How long have they been talking? Morgan looks at her phone and even more surprised that it's nearly 6am. Time went by so fast.

“I always wanted to see the sunrise from here. Thanks for the company.” Morgan smiles softly, running her fingers through her hair to distract herself from Poppy.

No one mentioned how one of their hands are still interlaced together or how Morgan's thumb drew circles on the back. Especially not Poppy's lips softly grazing the underside of her jaw.

They watched in silence, both aware that as the night was done, so will this new moment they found together.

“I'll take you to back to your dorm.” Morgan reluctantly says, unwilling to move. It was Poppy who moved off her first.

Morgan slides off the back of her truck smirking at Poppy. “Want a piggy back ride?”

Poppy scoffs. But positions herself anyway, her arms wrapped on Morgan's shoulders, Morgan's hands holding her legs securely as she closes the small distance to the front of her car.

They drove back in silence, neither speaking of the moment, afraid it will be over soon.

Morgan stops her car in front of Poppy’s sorority house, tapping her fingers anxiously against the steering wheel.  No one talked nor moved for a minute or two, they just stared at each other feeling the change in whatever relationship they previously held. Poppy’s alarm goes off, effectively ruining their moment.

“I guess... I'll see you later. Good Morning, Poppy.” Morgan smiles softly, hands gripping the steering wheel too tightly, knuckles going white, stopping herself from reaching out.

“I’ll… see you later. Thank you for driving me around.” They both know they will see each other but not in the same capacity as tonight, they will be back to being rivals, enemies, whatever the school made them out to be. She could see Poppy fighting a losing battle against herself before she reached out and kissed the corner of Morgan's mouth. She turns away like nothing happened and exits the car without looking back.

-------------------

Cause I’m off my face in love with you

I’m out my head so into you

And I don’t know how you do it

But I’m forever ruined by you

Cause I’m off my face in love with you

I’m out my head so into you

And I don’t know how you do it

But I’m forever ruined by you

Morgan stands and bows to the applause, yet she felt empty. It all felt useless somehow, she wasn't even there to hear the rest of it. She makes her way backstage, turning the corner as the next talent comes up. She felt like running but before she could turn and walk away, Poppy pushes herself off the wall and approached her. She gulped, unsure of what to do.

“Your voice is very beautiful.” Poppy tells her, voice almost as soft as a whisper. She's searching Morgan’s terrified eyes for something. “The song, did you write it?” She asks all the while moving closer, hands fiddling with the lapel of Morgan’s suit.

All she could do is nod, not trusting her voice at the moment. She takes a step back and another and another until her back is against the wall but Poppy follows her every step. Thank god they seemed alone or she would have burst into flames in embarrassment. Poppy steps closer until their bodies are almost touching.

“Who did you write that song for?”

“I...”

“Tell me.” Poppy looks up almost pleading, wanting to hear what she hoped to.

“It’s for you.” Morgan presses herself even more to the wall, wishing it would just swallow her up. She closes her eyes but it flies open when she heard Poppy gasp. “Are you surprised or?” Morgan trails off, observing Poppy’s expression going from astonished, to happy and outright tearing up.

“I can’t believe you wrote that song for me, I thought that there was someone else.” Poppy breathes in relief, Morgan’s hands wrap around her waist, supporting her weight.

“Just you.” Morgan says breathlessly. Watching her break into a smile made all the nerves she had vanish. She pulls her into a tight hug, smiling when she feels Poppy sink into the embrace. Her head leans on her shoulder and she rests her cheek on her hair. Poppy pulls back and smiles before leanig up and kissing Morgan.

[kimnjss]

together, with me | (requested)

⇢ pairing: seokjin x reader ⇢ fic type: one shot ⇢ genre: smut, fluff ⇢ word count: 4.7K ⇢ theme: boyfriend!jin, slice of life. ⇢ warnings: cursing, slight dirty talk, dry humping, oral (m. receiving), unprotected sex (wrap up lovelies), fingering, loss of virginity. this is highkey really tame. ⇢ synopsis: it’s been eight months since you’ve started your relationship with jin. he’s the guy for you, you’re sure of it. which is why you’re more than ready to take things to the next step. ⇢ A/N: this has been in my requests since last october :( and in my drafts for just as long- but im confident in this now, so i hope you guys like it as much as i do!! x

Eight months. Eight amazing months with the man that you were so lucky to call your boyfriend. Every single second, of every single day spent with him, was filled with laughter, smiles; he was able to make you feel such warmth; warmth you haven't felt... in a while. Maybe in your entire life.

 Meeting Jin, you decided, was the best day of your life. He was different from the other guys that tried to impress you, get your attention. When he had come up to you that day, with that dazzling smile – you could easily tell that there was no agenda. He genuinely wanted to get to know you, so you gave him a chance.

 Thought hanging out with him would just be some fun, trying out dating like your friends always suggested you should. You were in your 20s for crying out loud, no harm in having a little fun, right?

 Except your relationship was far from a little fun. All too quickly, you found yourself falling for him. Walls crashing around your heart and you were letting him in, not a care in the world because you had him. And he had you.

 What else could you ask for?

 It was starting to get really hard to control yourself around him, too. You were starting to notice things about him that you hadn't in the past eight months. Like the sexy sharpness of his jawline, or the soft groans that left his lips when your hands were in his hair. Way too often, you found yourself imagining what it would feel like to have those plump lips that he always sweetly pressed against your forehead... pressed somewhere else.

 Only natural, right? To start to desire your boyfriend in the way that you were. He was your boyfriend after all, right? Imagine doing things with him that could only be described as pornographic, but were you really the one to blame? Just one look at him, it was obvious that this wasn't your fault. This was Kim Seokjin we were talking about. It was only natural.

 The small, minuscule, problem though was the fact that the two of you haven't really taken things to that level yet... you haven't gone that far with anyone yet. So guarded and cautious, there was no way you'd let someone in, in that way. But you wanted to with Jin, just couldn't shake the trickle of fear in your heart that it would go to waste.

 You trusted him, but after waiting this long... it was a looming worry in the back of your mind. Wanted it to be perfect, your first time. Every last detail down to the guy that you were with. Was that guy really Kim Seokjin? 

 Did he even want to be?

[14:36] Jinnie: Should we go out to eat tonight?

 The message lit up the glass screen of your phone, interrupting the YouTube video you had been so enthralled with. Instantly forgetting the concept of the tutorial, your fingers were quick to open up the new message. A smile spreading across your lips at the thought of spending quality time with your boyfriend.

 It had been a few days since you saw each other last. You had gotten busy with some assignments and knowing how stressed and unhinged you managed to become, he decided that a little space would benefit. He was not wrong.

[14:37] You: Yes! What are you hungry for?

 Only a second was spared to allow your mind to wander to the list of possible replies he could send to your question. The simple 'You' had your toes curling, mind reeling. What if he did say something like that? How would you even respond?

 Was Jin the type to sext? Map out all the dirty things that he wanted to do to you through text? Express how hard you managed to make him through the screen? Show you. HAS HE SENT NUDES? Most likely, right? Guys were usually way too keen on showing their dicks, was Jin the same? Would he send you nudes if you asked him to? Could he convince you to send some back? Most likely.

[14:39] Jinnie: You decide, whatever you want. I'll come to pick you up in a little while. 

 Typing back your approval, your attention slowly shifted back the video that you had paused moments before. Yet, no matter how hard you tried to concentrate on the pretty beauty guru, you couldn't keep your mind from wandering to how good Jin would look sweaty and panting over you. Did you have a problem? Like a serious one, you were beginning to wonder.

 Seconds turned to minutes, minutes to hours before you were pulling yourself from the comfort of your bed to get ready for dinner with Jin. Not in the mood to get all dolled up on a Tuesday night, you had decided that a simple burger joint would suffice for dinner tonight. Jin was more than happy with your decision, which you could've easily predicted. 

 Jin's familiar knock against your front door rang through your ears just as you were fastening the buttons on your jeans. Hastily, you ran your fingers through your hair, wide eyes staring at your reflection in the mirror. Did this top make your boobs look weird or was it just your eyes? Suddenly, you were regretting finishing that carton of ice cream last night.

 With a dissatisfied huff and a few spritzes of his favorite perfume, you were making your way to the front door. Pulling it open only to be met by his big dazzling smile. Dark hair falling in messy waves, a loose white t-shirt covering his torso and form-fitting ripped jeans hugging his strong legs.

 “Hey, baby.” His smile only grew as he stepped further into your apartment, an arm circling around your waist to pull your body close. Something that he's done countless times before, but this time was different. A liquid fire taking up between your thighs, your body becoming all too aware of the fact that your breasts were pressed against his chest. Even through the fabric.

 “Hi,” You smiled, hands lifting to land on his covered pecks.

 Soft lips captured yours, a happy sigh leaving his lips as he leaned more into you, easily spreading your lips with his. Your hands fisted at the fabric of his shirt, mouth moving over his slowly, lovingly while your body pressed against his, greedily, full of desire; need. “You smell nice,” He was mumbling, upon detaching lips.

 “It's the perfume you got for me a bit ago,” He's nodding, hands reaching up to cup your cheeks within his palm. Jin is pressing his lips against yours once more softly, three innocent pecks landing on your soft lips.

 “I missed your lips,” You find yourself saying on a pout, body leaning up on your toes to muffle the chuckle that slips past his lips with your own. The tips of his fingers run over the sliver of skin exposed from your top, the gesture lighting a fire in the pit of your stomach.

 As if Jin can sense you're two seconds from tearing that shirt from his body, he's pulling away. Taking a few backward steps to, reluctantly, create some space between the two of you. Instead, he reaches for your hand, lazily holding your fingers with his. “You ready to go?”

 You're nodding at his words, stepping forward to close the space between you two, and to be able to reach your shoes. He watches as you slip them on, leading you out of the apartment into his car with his hand in yours.

 How he managed to make you so nervous, so on edge, without doing anything was a loss on you. Every last thing he did was like a trigger to these uncapped sexual thoughts in your head and you didn't think you'd be able to maintain control throughout the entire evening.

 There had to be something wrong with you because this man was simply driving! There was no reason for you to be salivating at the sight of him switching lanes, or ready to risk it all and palm him each time he took a tight turn. Sexual frustration, clearly made you irrational, you were quickly deciding.

 If Jin had noticed the odd way you were acting, he was doing a really good job at ignoring it. One hand gripping the steering wheel and the other wrapped around yours, he filled you in on the things that he did in the few days you hadn't seen each other. Jumping from stories of finally beating Jungkook in some video game to the triumph of getting Yoongi to admit his signature dish tasted better the way Jin made it.

 You listened intently, laughed along with him. Found comfort in knowing that he had a busy last few days, it was no secret that you felt a little bad about canceling on him just as things started to overwhelm. Thank God, you had such an understanding boyfriend. Such a perfect boyfriend that understood you. That cared about you.

 The smile on your face never seemed to falter as his laughter grew, the slight crinkle in his eye, the familiar squeak mixing with the chuckles. At the end of the plot of the movie, he wanted to watch it together with you sometime this weekend. Lost in admiring him, you were lifting his hand, pressing your lips against his knuckles.

 “What was that for?” He was smiling, turning his attention down to you. With a shrug, you hid your smile with his large fist, planting more soft kisses against his skin. “I like the way you look when you're laughing,” You confess, loving the pink tint that takes over his cheeks at the compliment.

 Pink cheeks rise at your compliment, his soft thumb brushing over the curve of your lips. Jin chances a moment to look at you, his eyes screaming every ounce of happiness, adoration, love that he felt for you. With you. You felt the rise in your chest, the uptake of your heartbeat. It had to be him. You loved him so much, there was no one else but him.

 Dinner was nice to put it simply. Food was delicious and Jin kept you entertained throughout the entire meal. What you couldn't shake, though, was the anxiety prickling at the back of your neck knowing that tonight was going to be the night. You weren't even properly prepared, all you knew was there was no way you'd be able to go another moment without being with him in that way.

 It was all you could think about.

 Ever so gentlemen like, Jin was walking with you the entire way to your apartment. A large hand finding your waist once you were reaching the door. You caught sight of the cute smile on his lips, not being able to resist leaning up to press your lips against his.

 He smiled against your mouth, free hand lifting to hold the other side of your waist. Liquid fire shoots through your veins as his mouth moves against yours. Something as innocent as a goodnight kiss, but he was driving you wild. The last thing you wanted to say was goodnight.

 His lips melded so perfectly onto yours, and he's leaning into you. The gentle so great that you're back is being pressed against the door behind you. As if he had been in tune with your body all night, knew what was coming. What had been floating through your mind long before he came to pick you up.

 The kiss changes, becoming hotter, needier, more desperate and it's him that makes the shift. Jin's hands drop from your waist onto your hips, fingers dig into your skin as he subtly pushes his hips forward. Half hard cock brushing against your thigh and you gasp, breaking the kiss with wide eyes.

 You two stand there, staring at each other for a moment. Never had you seen this man look so starved, hands clutching the fabric of your shirt as if he was seconds from tearing it apart. Chest heaving as if you had been doing more than just kissing, then again you were. It was becoming very evident to you that he had been more than aware of the nagging desire you'd been feeling all night.

 He had been feeling it too.

 “Do you want to come in?” His face softens at the sound of your voice, eyes searching your features for any sign of uncertainty. Jin knew all too well about your want to wait to have sex. Didn't push it when you asked him if he would be okay with waiting, simply smiled wide, and told you he didn't care because being with you was more than enough.

 You might've fallen in love with him at that moment, you were just too in your own head to understand. 

 Both of you knew what would happen if he agreed to come inside, and he didn't want there to be any level of doubt when it came to this. When it came to giving him your virginity. “Are you sure?�� He was grinning at the sight of your quick nod, leaning down to press another kiss to your lips.

 You're pushing the door open the moment he's detaching his lips from yours. The air changes with the slam of your front door. He's moving toward you quickly, arms circling around your waist to pull your body into his chest. He moves as if all restraint was left out in the hallway and your body is bubbling with such need you don't even think of the possibility of slowing down.

 Jin's head is tilting, mouth connecting with the skin of your neck. Like he's done many times before, he places open-mouthed kisses against your skin, grazing his teeth against bits that he's sure would get a reaction from you. He's right, breath hitching at the feel of his teeth and fist tightening around the fabric of his t-shirt.

 His hands are lifting, inching underneath the hem of your shirt. Slowly, as if he was waiting for you to voice your protest at any moment. You had none. There wasn't a thing in the world that'd make you change your mind. Not when you were so close that you craved so much. With him.

 There's a visible shudder in your body when his cool hands meet your warm breasts, palms hovering over the pert peaks. His soft chuckle tickles the skin of his neck, the feeling of his grin warming your body. “You're so fucking clueless...” He groans, fingers flexing around your breasts. Warmth oozing out of you, puddling in your panties that were quickly beginning to stick. All that from the sound of his deep, gruff voice. The way he cursed.

 “You have no idea the effect you have on me, I swear. Always walking around without a bra, can always see these cute little nipples.” He pinches one between his fingers to prove his point and you moan. “You're so hot,” Praise comes out through a whine, which had your entire body buzzing.

 With one swift movement, Jin is pulling back to pull your shirt from your body. He groans eye burrows furrowing with pleasure at the sight of your naked chest. He's lowering himself onto your couch as he stares up at you, arms open to welcome you into his lap. You waste no time with straddling his waist, hands burying in his hair the moment his lips latch onto your nipple.

 His free hand grasps and needs your neglected breast, lips wrapped tight and tongue rolling over the hardened bud. You can't keep your body from twitching, can't hold back the breathy moans that slip past your lips. Your fist in his hair holds his head in place, but that means nothing when he's rolling his hips against yours.

 “Fuck,” The sound of his groan mixes with your surprised whimper. The feeling of his clothed cock brushing against your slit lights a fire in his belly. Your heart begins to sputter, a wild spread of lust you've never felt before warming your lips. Fueling your hips enough to push down against him again.

 A soft moan escapes from his lips from the friction, mouth hanging open around your nipple as he pants. “Do that again,” He mumbles and you comply, loving the twitch of his hips the moment your crotches meet.

 Quickly, his hands are dropping to your hips; holding your body in place as he draws back, thrusting forward with slight force. Your body jolts, the ridge of his cock nudging against your sensitive clit making you gasp. You see the grin on his face, the mischief in his eyes just moments before he's repeating the action.

 He continues until he's full-on fucking against you, groans and whines leaving his lips and you have never seen him this desperate before. Usually, he was so composed and put together, but he looked as if he was moments from falling apart. All from a little dry humping? Never did you think how waiting would affect him, but in retrospect it had been eight months since he's been with someone... maybe longer.

 But he waited, patiently for you to be ready. Waited until you gave him the green light and now it was like he couldn't control himself. You loved it. How unabashed you were able to make him. A sick trickle of dominance flowing through your veins and you wanted more of it.

 With a newfound confidence, your hand was sliding between your bodies. Lifting your body slightly in order to fit your hand between his legs, grasping his covered cock in your palm. His body stills, round eyes watching your hand on him.

 “I want to make you feel good...” You trail off, never knowing what to say when it came to dirty talk. Not like you've been in this situation before, but you were drawing a blank. All you could do was tell him what you wanted and hoped that was good enough. “Wanna suck you off,” He groans, whines at the thought.

 A grin splits your face as you lean up to press a kiss to his lips. “I need you to teach me, though.”

 Jin's nodding before the sentence can fully leave your lips, body sinking further into the couch as he looked up at you, eyes drooped and almost sleepy. “Okay,” He breathes, blinking as if he can't believe what he's hearing. “Okay.” He repeats with a laugh, body straightening slightly. “Okay, yeah. I can teach you.” He grins and you laugh, lifting your body from his body while he fumbles with the buttons of his jeans.

 You watch as he tugs his pants down, following the movement by the inch. The soft patch of hair adorning his pelvic bone is the first thing you see before he's bobbing free from the restraint of his apparel. You can't help the way your jaw drops, and your eyes bulge at the sight of his cock.

 Thick and veiny, resting lazily against his hipbone. There's a slight sheen to it that could only be from the precum that had leaked from the angry red tip. His large hand reaches down to circle the base, eyes lifting to trace your features. You watch as he gives himself an introductory pump, teeth scraping against his lower lip.

 Instantly, you're being swarmed with nervousness; it nags at your throat and chest. Never have you seen a dick up close before and this big for one. You were supposed to fit all of that into your mouth? And then later inside of you? There was no way that was possible.

 He's sensing your anxiety, “It's okay,” He whispers with a smile. Confusion dancing across your brow, no idea that your emotions were that loud on your face. Realizing you had just been sitting there, wide-eyed staring you force yourself to move. Hand covering his until he's moving it, allowing your palm to wrap around his length.

 A groan falls from his lips as you slowly begin to move your hand over him. Eyes finding him, you waited expectantly for his instruction. “L-lick... the tip.” He mumbles and you're quick to lean forward, dragging your tongue over the wet head. His salty precum hits your tongue and you're deciding you like the way he tastes against his tongue, lips wrapping around the tip as you roll your tongue over it.

 “Oh, fuck.” He curses, body flinching, and you grin. Daring confidence coursing through your veins as you stroke him while your hand works against his length. “Suck on it,” Jin speaks through a strangled groan and you're quick to comply, lips wrapping tighter around his shaft as you suck.

 His head draws back, hips twitch as he reaches his hands up to pull your hair into a makeshift ponytail. Eyes flash up to take in how good he looks from this angle, a heat pooling between your legs. Your thighs clench to each other as you're lowering your head, opening up your mouth to take more of him down your throat.

 Jin's body sits up slightly, just enough so he can watch the way his cock disappears past your lips. A hand wrapped around the bit your mouth can't reach, you hollow your cheeks. “Your mouth feels so good, baby.” You're grinning at the praise, urging yourself to swallow more of him down.

 You're careful to keep your teeth out of the way, head bobbing as you slowly settling into a pace that's comfortable for you. Your hand twists around his shaft, squeezing with each drawback of your head. It's not a long before Jin is falling apart underneath you, hips lifting and toes curling. Your tongue traces over a prominent vein along the underside of his cock and he's flinching a strangled curse falling from his lips. 

 “Wait, fuck.” His hand in your hair pulls your head back slightly. And you take in his fucked out expression. The flush on his cheeks, plump lips red from the way he had been biting into them. “I need to be inside of you,” His dick twitches in your palm and you're nearly moaning out at the thought of him finally stretching you out.

 “We don't have to do this, though. If you're not sure...” Your heart warmed. Even with his hard pulsing ready cock between you, he was still so concerned with if this was what you wanted. “I'm sure.” Hands finding his shoulders, you press a soft kiss to your lips. “I want to. With you.”

 A laugh slips from your lips from the quickness of his movements after that, his hands on your hips pushing your body down into the comfort of the couch. “With me.” He repeats, and it's obvious your words managed to tug on his heartstrings.

 Jin mouths at your neck as his hand slips beneath the elastic of your leggings. “You're so perfect, you know?” He speaks as he lifts his head to look at your face. There's no use to hide the flush in your cheeks, half from his words and the other half from his fingers inching closer and closer to your throbbing heat.

 You gasp the moment the tips of his long fingers find your clit. He draws slow circles over the sensitive button, watching as you moan and twitch beneath him. Mouth falling open as he reaches lower, slowly pushing a finger past your folds. Your legs spread, body rocks with the movement of the digit while whimpers fall from your lips.

 A spread of heat is taking over your body, hands reaching for the tops of your pants to remove them. Jin notices your movements, free hand lifting to help you remove the offensive garment. Quickly after, sliding a second finger inside of you. “Jin!” You gasp, back arching from the upward curl of his fingers deep inside of you.

 “I need you,” There's a slight plead and your voice that has a pang of arousal shooting through his veins. Slowly he's drawing his fingers back, grinning at the way your walls clench around them in protest.

 Slowly he's positioning his body between your legs, thighs lifted to press against his thighs. You admire him as he looks down, dick in hand as he strokes his tip along your wet folds. “You haven't changed your mind?” He wonders, peaking up at your face.

 “Nope,” His smile meets yours, slipping into a slow gentle kiss. He's pulling away, hips thrusting forward and you already feel the stretch from just his head.

 “Tell me if it hurts... or if you want to stop,” You nod, mentally preparing yourself for the intrusion.

 Inch by inch, the rest of his length is pushing it's way past your walls. The pain is blinding, starting from your core and spreading throughout your entire body; growing more intense the deeper he slides into you. A hiss escapes your lips, head falling back as you clamp your lips shut.

 “Are you alright?” Concern laces his tone and you nod, trying to muster enough composure to actually speak.

 “I'm okay. Keep going,” You speak on a labored breath, and though unconvinced he's drawing back and pushing forward again. Curses slip past both of your lips, reasons different. “I'll go slow,” He promises before slowly pulling his hips back again.

 The amount of restraint he was applying not to just fuck into you. Wanting to allow your body to relax, desperately trying to keep his pleasure to make him crazed. It was hard with the tight grip around him, but the last thing he wanted was to hurt you.

 His thrusts are slow and controlled, mouth planting softening kisses against your skin in hopes to lessen the pain. There's a stutter in his hips as his pace quickens, paying great attention to your reaction as he rolls his hips into you. It's a few more thrusts before the pain is starting to truly lessen being replaced with a tingle of pleasure. A moan slips past your lips and Jin is snapping his head up.

 “Faster,” You encourage.

 He's groaning while pulling back to the tip, hips snapping forward into yours and he hisses. The restraint that he tried so hard to hold onto slowly slipping as he begins to lose himself in you, thrusts becoming sloppy and untimed. Face twisted with pleasure, fingers bruising your hips and skin slapping against skin, you can feel your orgasm slowly approaching, walls becoming tighter around him.

 “Fuck,” He gasps. “You're squeezing me so... shit,” He's fucking into you with so much power, the pain of the stretch mixing with the pleasure and it's enough to make your toes curl. “I'm- gonna cum,” He manages to gripe out.

 A large hand slithers down your body, fingers finding your wet clit; creating quick circles. A drawn-out whine leaves your lips, hips lifting to meet his. “Me too, baby... uh- fuck, I'm c-close,”

 His mouth captures yours in a heated kiss, fingers rolling between your legs as his thrusts grew uncontrolled. “Cum... together, with me.” Pure want, desire flashes through his eyes, your heart welling up and exploding against your chest. All resolve snapping as your orgasm hits and he's not far behind you.

 You feel the thick spurts of his arousal coat your constricting walls, legs shaking as his slowly thrusts help you ride it out. With one last powerful thrust his hips are stilling completely, body falling limp above you.

 Jin's lips find yours, kissing you slowly. You can feel the heaving of his chest against yours, the fast beat of your hearts. A sheen layer of sweat coats both of your bodies. He's pulling back slowly, looking at you as if you were the one who had hung the stars. And there's no way you can hold it back anymore.

 “I love you,” “I'm in love with you.” His words mix with yours, a grin spreading across your lips in realization that the same thing had been on his mind. He laughs, leaning up to press a soft kiss to the tip of your nose. “I love you,” He repeats, rephrases and you giggle, arms wrapping around his neck.

 “I'm in love with you.” You smile, loving the way his face lights up at your words, just before he's leaning down to press his lips against yours again.

requests are open

[northcarolinanative]

𝙲𝚘𝚕𝚕𝚒𝚜𝚒𝚘𝚗 (𝟽)

Chapter 7: I’m Not Giving Up 

Description: John B’s Sister comes home from staying with their mom, only to find out that her brother is missing and her dad was murdered. JJ may have just lost his best friend. Her and JJ have to figure out what to do and how to pick up the pieces.

A/N: This is going to have like 100 chapters probably jk maybe, anyway… Tell me what you think, I love hearing feedback from you guys. Also, my requests are open and so are my messages:( pls message me!! Hope y’all enjoy :) 

Need to catch up? Ch.1 / Ch.2 / Ch.3 / Ch.4 / Ch. 5 / Ch.6

I woke up and fluttered my eyes open. I heard rustling and all I saw was darkness. I realized that JJ and I were still intertwined from the position we were in the night before. I was faced with his chest, his head resting on mine, and his arm wrapped to cover my face. He was warm and I could feel a sudden draft of wind, making me move closer to him. I started to doze back off in the warmth of the bed. Things we’re black, but I heard people walking, and then an “Shhhh,” followed by papers rustling. “What is all this?” I felt JJ move his head from mine. I wasn’t dreaming, was I? 

“I see you’re coping by throwing yourself at the tourist girls per usual.” l definitely wasn’t dreaming someone was in the house. I jumped at the sound of the voice, not sure why it had scared me so much. I felt JJ wrap his arms around me a little tighter. 

“It’s just Pope and Kie,” JJ said to me. I slowly sat up in the bed looking at both of them. I knew they were hurting, but throwing that insult at JJ, uncalled for. I moved my hair behind my ear, my face turning red from the position that they had found JJ and I in. I just smiled as both of them looked between JJ and me with a stunning glance on their face.  

“Y/N?” Kie was the first to speak, before running up to me and giving me a soft hug. “What the hell? When did you-” She stopped, taking in that I was here, in front of her. 

“I got back a few days ago” I said shortly, looking over to JJ who was looking at Pope giving each other glances. 

Pope finally looked my way. “Honestly didn’t think we’d ever see you again.” He chuckled at his own statement. 

“Y’all can’t get rid of me that easily now,” I said trying to lighten the mood. “What are y’all doing here?” I asked getting up from the bed, pushing JJ off in the meantime so I could fold it up. He let out an annoyed groan but ended up helping me as we listened to Kie and Pope. 

“We thought we would come by, see if everything was alright over here. You know, maybe clean the place up.” Nothing about seeing if JJ was staying here, maybe that’s why they were here, just didn't say it. 

“Yea, somehow Y/N got me to clean the house up her first night back.” JJ joked as he put the last cushion on the couch, flopping down on it. 

“How did you manage that Y/N?” Pope laughed with him. The air was thick, now it was Pope and Kie sharing glances, and I remembered what JJ told me about their maybe relationship. That wasn’t the only reason the air was thick. 

We all were at a loss for words without John B. No one knew if it was okay to joke and laugh, or if we should all be crying. The air in the room was so thick it was almost hard to breathe. We all sat around, JJ pulling out his Juul and taking a few puffs, relieving his own feeling of tension. 

I broke the silence, moving toward the maps. “What have you guys been up to?” It was a simple question but asked much more than just that. I wanted to know how they were doing after losing John B, but more importantly why that had not reached out to JJ. Maybe I was being too hard on them, it had only been a few days, but until now they did not know that JJ wasn’t alone. 

“Uh. Not too much. We went to the tent to see Shoope a few times, other than that, trying to figure out where to go from there, how to move forward.” Move forward. Ouch.

“Yea. I mean we’ve been at the Wreck almost all day with my dad, he doesn’t really want us to leave with all this still going on. He thinks they’ll pin it on us.” 

I quickly looked at JJ, giving him a questioning look. Why would they pin anything on the other pogues? JJ made it seem like everyone knew by now that Rafe was guilty. “He’s probably looking out for us. You know Mr. C, Y/N always looking out for us.” 

I mumbled a “right” making a mental note to ask him about it later. I moved to start cleaning up the maps. I had no plans to tell the other two what JJ and I were up to, as they were trying to “move forward.” John B had told me that they believed our dad was dead, even when we didn’t, but I thought maybe since it was their friend this time they would think differently. 

“So what is all this?” Pope asked, moving to look at the maps scattering the counter in front of us. 

“Nothing,” I said. 

At the same time JJ spoke up “Wild goose chase, part 2.” I shot JJ a look. If looks could kill he would have been dead. 

Kie looked between the two of us and then grabbed the last map on the table that I hadn’t folded up yet. She looked over it and then back at me. “Are you really trying to find them?” She looked at JJ. “You both still think they're out there?” 

I took the map out of her hand and quickly folded it up to move it into the bin with the others. “Of course I do Kiara.” I used her full name, something I tend to do when I am mad. I was shocked that she expected anything different. “I am not giving up on my brother, not now! It’s only been a few days, and you both are ready to salute him goodbye!” I motioned between her and Pope. 

“Y/N, if they were there don’t you think the police would have found them by now, huh?” She asked moving closer to me. I didn’t like this, the pogues were normally supportive, but something had changed. 

“Yea, because their top priority is finding some fugitive from the cut that's been lost at sea.” Sarcasm dripping from my words “If we don’t stick up for them, who will, huh?” I fired back, mimicking her tone. 

“You know, your brother said the same thing, look where that got him. You would think after what happened to your dad and your brother chasing things lost at sea, you would learn not to.” 

I stopped what I was doing. I froze. I could not believe that she said that. “Kie what the hell?” Pope said to her. He looked at me with pity in his eyes. 

“Yea what the fuck Kie?” JJ stood up and walked in my direction. 

She looked around and quickly walked out of the house, Pope nodded at JJ and quickly followed her. It wasn’t a few seconds after the door shut that JJ wrapped his arms around me in a hug. He didn’t say anything. He didn’t have to. 

I pulled away from JJ. “I’m gonna go sit by the water for a bit. I need to clear my head.” I said before starting towards the back door. 

“You sure you’ll be okay by yourself?” I smiled back and just nodded before turning back to the dock. 

I sat down letting my bare feet rest in the water. The water was cool, as it was still the morning. Kie really gave up on John B, so did Pope. It hurt me to think like that, but what if they were right? What if all this work was just JJ and I trying not to process our emotions, something neither of us handled well. I did not want to think about John B or even the way that my heart sped up around JJ. My mind shifted to JJ, the new relationship that had seemed to form the past few days. It wasn’t anything I should be thinking about, but it helped me from thinking about John B. JJ and I had always been friends, but recently, with the constant comforting touches and the nights that we had shared, made things feel different. 

As if on cue JJ came walking down the dock, and like that my alone time was over. JJ never was one for being alone anyway. When he reached me, he leaned down and handed me an open beer. “Thought you could use this.” He said as I grabbed it. “Do you need more time?” He asked. 

“Nah. I just need to cool off after that…” I paused as I watched him sit down, “heated discussion.” I laughed. 

“She shouldn’t have said any of that, it was uncalled for.” There it was, those constant, reassuring touches, as he put his arm lazily around my shoulders. “I’m sorry.” 

“We aren’t being crazy are we?” I asked looking up at him. “I mean she is right isn’t she? In some respect at least? I mean I’m literally doing what I was complaining about both of them doing, hunting a shipwreck.” 

“We aren't hunting a shipwreck Y/N” He paused and looked at me. “We’re hunting our friend, your brother, we’re looking for someone, not something. It’ll be worth it in the end, Promise.”

We sat like that on the dock in silence for a while the breeze came off the ocean. “Kie really thought I was just some tourist you were macking to help you cope?” I laughed nudging JJ slightly. 

“I know. She really has no faith in me.” He shook his head but I could hear the sarcastic tone in his voice. “Plus, you have changed since last summer. Your hair is longer and it’s all light and sunny. Plus you’ve grown up, I mean we all have. I don’t blame her for not recognizing you” I just looked back down at the water, a blush creeping up to my cheeks at his sudden affections. “Plus we could be macking, I’m not objecting” I turned quickly to look at him after his sudden statement. He had a huge smile on his face. 

“What?” I nervously laughed. 

“What?” He laughed back. 

-- 

MASTERLIST 

Tag List: @nikki082489 @lovelymaybankk @dolanfivsosxox​ @alexa-playafricabytoto @downbytheouterbanks @heyhargrove​ @kayln021 @readysteadygo23 @im-a-stranger-thing @thatsonobx @dumbxgurl @ameeraaa21 @zehnuhrfunf @imagines-and-preferences1216 @mileven-reddie If you wanna be added to a tag list just reply below or message me:) if your user is crossed out it wouldn’t let me tag you? 

[lokissweater]

Little Darling

Soldier!Harry Styles x Reader

Summary: Harry falls in love with the pretty nurse that takes care of him during the war.

Warnings: none my bbys :*

Authors Note: oh my god, the response i got from flower boy was insaaane y’all made me cry happy tears for dAYS LMFAO, but honestly thank you so muchhh, and im so sorry i’m been mf gONE i’ve had this and three more drafts in the works and i never got around to finishing them heheh, anyways enjoy!! and if you’ve sent me a request don’t worry i’m also working on that rn and thanks for sending it in! love u! <3

Word Count: 1,998

You had never met anyone like Harry.

“Patient 113! Patient 113!”

Nurses scurried around the small hospital, hundreds of men injured as you hurried your way to the front desk.

“I’ll take him,” You said quickly. “Bring the other ones in.”

You carefully sat him down and wheeled him across the hectic large room and to an open spot.

The side of his face was bloody, and he remained unconscious as doctors lifted his limp body onto the bed. You quickly grabbed gauzes and disinfectants, ridding of the dirt, sweat, and dried up blood off of his face.

“Patients name?” The doctor asked.

You pulled the dog tag from under his uniform and said, “Harry Styles.”

The doctor pressed a stethoscope to his heart and listened, “We have a pulse.”

He then wiped his forehead in exhaustion. “From the looks of it, he took a blow to the head and fell unconscious, but he’ll be fine.” He then hung the tool around his neck. “He’s all yours now y/n, just clean him up and call me when he wakes.”

“Yes sir.”

Then, you hadn’t thought anything of him. Just another patient you anxiously wanted to save because unfortunately the one before, couldn’t be.

But when Harry awoke, his dazed eyes drifted around the room, and once he regained his senses and actually looked at you, he didn’t hesitate to say that you were the most beautiful little thing he had ever seen.

This, of course, made you roll your eyes and blame it on the antibiotics, but he stood by his word and would even go as far as to request for you if a different nurse came to tend to him.

You had grown to love his unruly hair and sense of humor, but most of all, were his eyes. They reminded you of the trees your grandmother used to grow around her small cabin in the middle of no where, and from time to time would pick a sparkling emerald leaf to place gently in your small palm for good luck.

Now every leaf she had ever given you was stowed away in an old jewelry box inside your attic, brittle and brown. But each time you looked into Harry’s eyes, it was as if your childhood never left, as if the leaves never dried out, and as if your grandmother never died.

You spent a great deal of time taking care of him, and as soon as he recovered he took you out on a date by the river; picking small daisies to card gently behind your ear. It was sweet, his cute dimples evident as he smiled at you. The air was fresh and calm, and the sight of Harry on the grass, palms spread behind him with his head tilted back, sun adorning his features, was a sight hard to forget.

He’d always call you his little darling and made sure you were absolutely happy at all times. You were his sunshine, and it wasn’t hard for him to fall in love with you.

All of this was short lived though when you received devastating news. Harry was to be drafted again, and the area was no where near where you were at the moment, meaning if Harry got hurt you wouldn’t be able to treat him.

And if he died, you wouldn’t know until weeks after.

When he told you, you cried your eyes out while he got down on his knees, hands placed firmly on your arms.

“Little darling, hey, don’t you cry,” He wiped the tears off of your puffy cheeks with one hand and sighed. “I’ll come back to you, I promise you baby, don’t you cry.”

“Harry you could die!-”

“I won’t.” He said firmly. “You really think i’d leave you that easily sunshine? You’re gonna have to chase me to the ends of the earth to even give you a minute by yourself.”

That had made you laugh, and he wrapped his arms around you as he stood back up. “I’ll come back. I’ll write to you everyday a-and send you the very first flower I see. I’ll be back before you know it.”

You only nodded into his chest, a soft smile on your face, “I love you.”

Harry tightened his hold around you and rested his chin on top of your head.

“Tell me again,” He whispered. “I want to hear it one more time before I go.”

Harry kept his word and wrote to you as often as he could, but you still spent each and every day worrying for him and his safety. You had taken note of the increasing amount of men that came piling into the small hospital you worked at, and the injuries only seemed to worsen. You’d ask Harry what was going on in your letters, but he’d write back saying that everything was fine, and ultimately change the subject.

“Our men are dying,” One of the nurses had said to you as she patched up an unconscious soldier, “Many won’t come home.”

That made you sick to your stomach, and it didn’t help when after two years since Harry’s departure, his letters abruptly stopped coming soon after. The last one he had sent was dated a month ago, and it read:

Dear y/n,

How are you my little darling? Are you happy and well? I hope you are. I miss your pretty face.

Something tragic happened. My best mate died on field yesterday, and I have never felt such remorse in my entire life. It’s getting harder to stay alive my love, and when I saw his still body in the dirt, all I saw was red.

But I’m still alive. When I woke up this morning I saw a single daisy in the midst of gravel and mud, and it reminded me of you. You’re surrounded by horrible people and an awful environment but you remain brilliant. I’ve never met anyone like you.

If I don’t make it, just know how much I truly, deeply love you, and you’ve made me the happiest man alive. My days with you are memories I’ll never forget.

See you soon baby.

- HS

Below was a small daisy taped carefully onto the bottom of the page, and you cried looking at it once more before folding the letter back up and stuffing it in the pocket of your uniform.

“Any news?” One of the nurses said. Another sighed and shook her head.

“All radios are down. No one knows a thing.”

“Its been almost a full day,” You mumbled. “I think we’ve lost the war.”

A gloom of realization spread across the room, nurses and doctors with a defeated expression. It was silent, and everyone seemed to zone out until one of your close friends sat herself down on a chair next to you.

“Has he written?” She whispered.

“No. I’m starting to think-”

“Don’t say it,” She scooted closer to you. “He’s okay and you know it. You’re his sunshine, remember?”

You smiled sadly, “I do, but he hasn’t written in a month.”

“Maybe he can’t find paper,” She shrugged. “Or a pen.”

“Maybe he’s-”

“We won! We won the war!”

Everyone abruptly stood, chairs screeching against the tile floor. You quickly ran down the hall along with other nurses and into a different room. Others were already hunched over a small table that held a working radio.

“Our men are coming home!”

Cheers and cries filled the air, and you stood frozen as many wrapped their arms around you in joy.

Word was that the veterans were to return in a train arriving in about an hour, and you wasted no time in slipping on your jacket and running with many others to the station. You couldn’t even be bothered to remove your uniform, the love of your life was finally coming home.

Upon arrival, people were buzzing with anticipation and happiness. Personal space didn’t seem to be a thing as everyone waited for the train to pull in, and once it did, the shouting commenced.

Man after man came hopping out of the train, beaten up expressions but nonetheless with a smile on their faces, yet none of them were Harry. You stood on your tippy toes to get a better look, but you were still overrun by the people in front of you.

You couldn’t help but smile as you saw a woman with two kids clutching onto a soldier next to you, their children’s small arms wrapped around their father’s legs. You thanked your lucky stars that at least they got their happy ending, and pushed yourself through the crowd to get to the front.

It became apparent after a little while though, that you may not have gotten your happy ending. As the area dispersed and became empty, your vision blurred with tears. You couldn’t believe it, you didn’t want to believe it.

He said he’d come back, you thought.

A gust of wind blew through your hair, and you wrapped your arms tightly around yourself for comfort and for warmth. You screwed your eyes shut and tilted your head back, tear drops slipping into your hair. In the midst of feeling the warm sun caress your face, you imagined Harry calling out to you in the distance, calling you his little darling again just like he’d done many times before.

Except you hadn’t.

When you opened your eyes, a tall figure stood a couple feet away from you, and you rid your eyes from the remaining tears to see who it was.

“H-Harry?”

He smiled warmly at you, tears pricking the corner of his eyes.

When he got off the train, the sight of you standing there, wind whirling through your hair with your head tilted back; sun adorning your features and a pained expression, was a sight hard to forget.

But as he looked at you now, doe eyes wide that gleamed of hope and disbelief, the days out on field and the awful deserts meant nothing to him. The days of treterous fear, the cold nights where he felt nothing but alone, meant absolutely nothing to him.

But you, you meant everything to him.

“Hey little darling.” He said gently, fingers reaching out to touch yours. The warmth that radiated from your hand brought him back to reality and reassured him that he wasn’t dreaming.

At his words, you breathed out a laugh and threw your arms around his neck, and Harry in response scooped you up off the ground, taking note of the familiar strawberry scented shampoo you always used.

“I thought you died,” you whispered in his ear.

“Can’t get rid of me that easily baby cakes.” He said playfully, kissing your cold cheek.

You laughed and pulled your head back to look at him. He looked as handsome as you remembered, but he looked so worn out. The bags under his eyes and slow blinking clearly indicated that he was exhausted, and you smiled warmly, softly kissing his cheek.

“Let’s go home.”

Home.

What he’d been waiting for. The place he wanted to share with you, the place where he wanted to wake up and one day find the smell of pancakes and honey smothering your shared bedroom, and maybe, just maybe, with two little hands grabbing at his face to get him to wake up.

He nodded at you then, fingers laced with yours as you walked along the train station. The setting sunlight highlighted Harry’s green eyes; and they were soft, looking out into the streets ahead of you that held nothing but love yet still vigilant, and you were reminded of your grandmother once more.

“Harry?” you called suddenly.

“Yes, little darling?”

“How come you didn’t write to me these last few months?”

He smiled at you lazily and gently brushed your hair over your shoulder, running a soothing hand over your lower back.

“Couldn’t find paper, my love.” He hummed, “Or a damn pen.”

[was-wicked]

Laws

       RP is meant to be something fun for both parties. Here are some rules to ensure we both feel safe and comfortable while writing together!!! I may sound harsh and picky here, though I promise I am not. I am just slowly adapting and changing with the me personally, what I feel needs to be said, and just things I add that I see overtime. I am very protective of my muse (hence why I have so many rules) but I love writing and I would love to write with you, but first I would love if you could take some time to skim this over real quick. 

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1. At a time I will actively have running usually 100+ threads on this blog alone. Yes it is a lot and yes I am a part time worker and full time student, but I have a schedule to work it out

            -If you think that I am forgetting something of ours or have lost it, you can message me to remind me but please be courteous about this. I have a life and this is a deep hobby of mine and sometimes I have spouts of time when it’s easier to write with mates.

2. I love memes. I fully consider myself meme trash. If you reblog a meme, there is a 99% chance that I will send it (I have been holding back, and I keep saying that I will stop. But now I generally mean it). IF I SEND YOU A MEME YOU ARE NOT OBLIGATED TO RESPOND. YOU DON’T EVEN HAVE TO MESSAGE ME AND SAY I AM NOT FEELING IT, JUST DELETE IT. I will not be upset. I understand. And I do not care.

             - If you send a meme and want to continue a thread, you also don’t need to ask. Just go.

            - This being said, please don’t reblog memes without sending them in. I do believe in reblog karma, especially since I have been on mobile a lot more.

             - This is also where I want to emphasise the word: NO. You have a right to it. I do too. So don’t be afraid to use it.  

3. Replies might take me awhile. Leta is an emotionally complex character and as such it takes a lot of energy to write a single paragraph. Every word and motion she makes has a reason to it. I do not half ass any of my threads, every word of it is coming from Leta and has been thought out thoroughly, as such, somethings get replied before other and go in the opposite order of what I owe (my drafting process goes something like: Okay. This is what I owe, though if I cannot write this for whatever reason I will move on to something else I owe said partner). I take my muse very (too) seriously and Leta can get in certain moods and since I write from her and where her head space is at. Sometimes Leta will want to throw herself into bad and torturous situations, other times she just wants a hug, and other times she just wants a cry. She is emotional. She has trauma. If you won’t give me patience, which I don’t either sometimes, I get it, give HER some.

            -Going along with this, I don’t censor Leta. If she says or does something that makes your muse or you uncomfortable I ask you please message me.  (this applies to OOC as well)

           -And also. I play Leta a little differently than others, I know. Don’t tell me how to control my muse. And don’t GodMode.

          -I love criticism and thought on what I am missing, but that is different from hate. THIS IS A HATE FREE ZONE FOR ME AND MY MUTUALS. DO. NOT SEND. HATE.

4. Starter Calls, Meme Calls, ANY call unless otherwise stated is mutuals only. Memes are for everyone, though it may take me a little to get to them. This is for my own sanity 

         -You can ALWAYS send me memes and you can ALWAYS message me to plot. And if we are mutual you can always send me an in character ask unprompted. 

5. I am a selective shipper. The way I portray Leta she is very very VERY emotionally raw. She doesn’t get into platonic or romantic relationships too easily. When it comes to romance the only character who does not have to come approach me about plotting is Theseus Scamander (and a young Newt, but that is toxic). Otherwise just pop into my IM’s with a “yo. I ship our characters” and we can talk about it.

6. OC’s. I love them, though I ask your character has a bio and that you are okay if I ask you some questions about your character. Without a biography I have the full right and will probably say no to writing with you.

      -Though I will not have any pre-assumed relationships with an OC unless otherwise discussed and plotted.

7. I  am 18+. There will be adult content on this blog. I like writing adult content. I will RP with minors. I will not RP the following material with a minor as I deem it adult only material: NSFW, Manipulation, Torture, Kidnapping. If I find out that you are underage I will message you and drop the thread.

       -I am okay with most thing on this blog, but the following are triggers I personally do not allow: Rape and other forms of sexual assault (can comfort people about it BUT DO NOT TRY THAT ON MY MUSE), and Self Harm.

    -On the terms of triggers, this blog may contain the following triggers besides the ones about: depression, thoughts of suicide, downess/mass insecurity, abuse, parental abuse, parental abandonment, inappropriate alcohol use, neglect, and more. And I may not tag it as some triggers are just part of Leta’s narrative.

8. Have fun. Communicate with me. Send me a meme. Send me ten. IM me. Ask me questions. Say hi. I am honestly just so happy to be here and want to do anything and everything on this blog. IM me to plot. IM to ship. IM me to send a hello or to rant about your day. I value communication and rather enjoy talking to other mutuals. I promise, you are never being annoying with anything you do, and if you have a question, go ahead and ask me! I love just chatting but am the absolute scaredest bean who does not know what to do or say sometimes so if I ever annoy you, you have every right to come into my messages and smack me on the head.

        -I would like to say that I hope to be first and foremost a friend. Partner. We’re a team and I am always here for anything. So please don’t be afraid to ask or poke me about anything. 

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WOAH! That’s a lot! But look you made it! Thank you for checking this out. If you could possibly send the password:  “only blinkered people” just to show that you’ve read my rules that would be awesome. Character Bio in the description and I cannot wait to write with you!

[felixeslee]

92 q tag

hello this tag is highkey irrelevant now but it’s been in my drafts for ages so !! laskdgjasodigjsaldkgasodigjasdg which is why i wont b tagging anyone bc im so late but !! yeah !! ok !! !!!!!!!!!1111!!! lets !! go !!!!!!!!!!!!!! 

tagged by @hyuunjins @hyunjinh @straykiz and @dae-hwee from my w1 blog (lmaoo hi pindi this is sarah!! AIddgsdfk if youre aware of this blog but hope its ok if i do it here alskdg ) 

rules: once you’ve been tagged, you are supposed to write a note with 92 truths about you. At the end choose 25 people to be tagged. 

🌙 LAST

Drink: the water that I drank this morning!! Aka around 12 hrs ago asdgasdgoij pls stay hydrated kids 

Text Message: i texted my brother if he knew where my dad was lol,,,,,,, sldkjgaosidgj 

Phone Call: CALLED MY BROTHER BC HE WASNT RESPONDING MY TEXTS,,,,, he also didn’t pick up ldskgjsoidgjsldkgsjdg

Song you listened to: Goodbye My Love by Aileeeee <3 lovv 

Time you cried: TODAY ,,,, i was getting super anxious bc i didn’t know where my dad was ??? he was supposed to pick me up but he forgot abt me until like an hr later… sldkgjaosidgj 

🌙 HAVE YOU EVER

Dated someone twice: no :00 lmao i’ve never dated… ever alskdjgaoijsdf 

Kissed someone and regretted it: i havent had my first kiss yet HEH 

Lost someone special: unfortunately, yes :( 

Been depressed: sdgksjadoiglskdfosdijgalskdfaosdigjaksdgoaisdjf idk 

Been drunk and thrown up: lmao i’ve never drank ,,, at all,,,, the smell of alchohol scares me,,,,, evn my little brother has had a sip once and he’s 5 yrs younger LMAO ,,, but im a noob and don’t wanna try sldkgjosidjgs 

🌙 IN THE PAST YEAR HAVE YOU

Made a new friend: yay yes yeslgkdgsdf

Fallen out of love: i dont think i’ve ever evn been in love…. Sdlgksjdoigj 

Met someone who changed you: yes,,,,,,,,, 

Found out who your true friends are: uhhhh idk aslkdgjaosidjf i honestly can never tell when someone’s being a fake friend so!!!!!! Idk honestly lmao

Found out someone was talking about you: i did ! but it wasn’t for anything bad or anything……… they just criticized me behind my back?? But i agreed w their criticism so alsdkjgaosidgj  

🌙 GENERAL

How many people on tumblr do you know in real life?: ummm,,,, like 4?? We r mutuals evn though none of them r actually kpop blogs,,,, so i always feel guilty spamminig their aesthetic feed w my screaming tags and annoying shit LMAO but i lov them <3 

Do you have any pets?: NO :”( I WANT A DOGGO THO …. REALLY BAD…..

Do you want to change your name?: uhhh ik so many sarahs its not evn funny and my last name is hella basic too????? Theres 3 ppl that share my first+last name in my school alone….. So maybe i’d change it to my chinese name (yue) ?? also bc it sounds more sophisticated,, and i lov anything that makes me sound smarter than the reality of my dumb self LOL 

What time did you wake up this morning: LOL so my alarm rings at 6:40 but i get out of bed at 7:10 SLDGKJSODIF … and i need to get out of the house by 7:20 lsdkgsdoig 

What were you doing last night: physics and apush :SLDGJOSIDFJ the 2 most dreaded classes UGH

Something you cannot wait for: DINNER .. i love me some gud dinner

Have you ever talked to a person named tom?: thomas jefferson my mAN 

What’s getting on your nerves right now: when it’s so heckin cold i can’t concentrate + i hate taking notes when it’s cold??? Bc then my hands r like half numb and it HURTS WHEN I TAKE NOTES sldkgsoidjf ALSO WHEN I DRAW ,,,,, STIFF FINGERS R THE WORST WHEN DRAWING

Blood type: i think a????????????

Nickname: my most common ones r swisso + salad (i promise these make sense in context LOL ) 

Relationship status: return NullPointerException; //im a cs person,,, dont judge

Zodiac sign: capricorn!

Pronouns: she + her

Favorite show: i dont watch many shows but i love watching a gud studio ghibli movie when im feelin down

College: this QUESTION LSDKGJSODIGJ ,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, i wanna go to college but will any accept me ??!?!

Hair colour: its naturally black but it’s currently dyed ombre from black → brown !!!!!!

Do you have a crush on someone: i havent had a legit crush in 3 yrs lmao……. 

What do you like about yourself: the fact that im a deep sleeper. Idk how light sleepers function omg like wouldn’t u wake up to like,,,,, everything??! :((( that makes me sad bc u hav no idea how much i lov a nice long undisturbed slumber

   🌙 FIRSTS

First surgery: okAY so like i've had 2 procedures done on my eyes lmaooo like (1) when i was a smol beb of like 1 yr old i rolled off my bed aaaannnnddd the corner of my eye hit the edge of the sharp corner of the bedside table!!! and then y1ke$ things got ugly loll (((yes, i wuz dum + clumsy since the day i popped from the womb))) its all stitched up now and i hav a tinie tinie scar aslkdgs okay and (2) there was something weird abt my tearducts LOL so u know when u get sad nd stuff ur nose gets runny and u sniff a lot??? well like that wasn't the case for me bc the passage way from my eyes to my nose was completely blocked off,,,,, which resulted in me lookin like i was full blown cryin like every 2 seconds... like if i kept my eyes open for too long my eyes would get watery and tears would flow out LMAO ,,,, i looked like i just never stopped crying,,, but it was just my eyes were just ALWAYS WATERING sdlgjsdif damn u have no idea after the procedure i was like 'do ppl live like this??? not having to wipe tears every 0.2 sec??? oh my god,,, i am livin THE LIFE' 

First piercing: i hav no piercings!!! Bc stabbing holes thru myself scares me sdlkjgsoidg but i love the way earrings look tho so :///// 

First sport you joined: dance or gymnastics???? I dont rly remember

First vacation: CHINA prob???? 

First pair of sneakers: i think sketchers LMAO ,,, the big thing  

🌙 RIGHT NOW

Eating: nothing!!!!!

I’m about to: do som sketches for my AP art class 

Listening to: my dad sing som old chinese folk stuff behind me LOL 

Want kids: i already adopted all 9 members of stray kids tho ??? idk if im ready for more atm 

Get married: LOL This question just reminded me of smol story from my childhood: so like i used to b rly close w these 3 other kids,,,, one other girl and 2 guys,,, and our parents were all rly tight too,, and our four families would just go camping together and it was rly :’’D fun and so we all made a pact that I would marry one of the guys and the other girl would marry the other guy and we’d all go camping together forever but then KINDERGARTEN HIT,,,, we moved schools and yeah im still rly close w the girl but i miss the 4 of us dkgjsodigjsdlkgsdf LOL 

Career: waterbottle 🌙 

WHICH IS BETTER

Lips or eyes: eyes? Eh idk i just never rly considered lips ?? LOL 

Hugs or kisses: hugs? I dont hav experience w kisses so sldkgjsoidgjsd yike syikes yikes 

Shorter or taller: TALLER

Troublemaker or hesitant: uhhhhh neither??? Like i just want someone playful + extroverted bc im quite introverted,,,,,,,,,, so if he was hesitant we’d just b super awkward and quiet,,, and i don’t like getting involved w sketchy troublemaker shit either LOL ,,, 

Older or younger: as long as they r in the same school grade level,,,, and i guess 1-2 yrs older is okaY? But lowkey freaks me out if too old 

Romantic or spontaneous: sldkgjsoidfj both? Like i lov someone who is unpredictable and spontaneous,,,, but on the other hand im lowkey a helpless romantic lasdkgjaoisdjf 

Sensitive or loud: both i guess too??? Its good to have someone understanding and sensitive but also someone who knows how to have fun  :) 

Hookup or relationship: hookups,,,,,,,, just dont make sense to me,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, like i get attached to someone p easily so even if i dont plan on being attached,,,, i’d probably get attached :(  

🌙 HAVE YOU EVER

Kissed a stranger: YIKES no 

Drank hard liquor: nO 

 Lost contacts/glasses: UH I HATE THIS BUT YES….. 

Sex on first date: yikes * (6.02 *10^23) adkgaosidjgaslkdf no thaNK you 

Broken someone’s heart: i dont know,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, like i might’ve but maybe im just not aware ,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, but on a sidenote i think my old comupter science teacher gets a migrain everytime he sees me LOLLLLLL sdlgjsoidgjsldf 

Been arrested: no,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, :0 

Turned someone down: yeah lmao i kinda feel bad tho bc they were all good ppl,,,,  lskjgosidjf but thankfully im still good friends and pretty tight w all of them ~  

🌙 DO YOU BELIEVE

In yourself: ocassionally i try to :’’D

Miracles: lol yes 

Love at first sight: i used to ? but not anymore,,,, like i believe u can be attracted to someone at first sight ?? but i feel like love cannot be attained thru visual contact only asldgjoasidjalsdg

[spacenightwing]

What are you doing here anyway?

Summary: Writing prompt for dialogue "What are you doing here anyway?"

Jason finds Dick in a place he's not supposed to be. Why? Their father is the king of pricks.

Brotherly bonding, drunken Dick Grayson and protective Jason Todd ensues.

HUGE thanks to @marvelgirl411 and @conchacunt for beta help! You guys are amazing thank you for everything!! 

A03

Jason likes this bar. It's in the heart of the Narrows, so it's not exactly the best place to snag a date and the quality of alcohol is pitiful on a good day; but it's cheap as hell and it's the perfect place to go when he's trying to avoid a particular bat and his cult following. On the accusations the Bat does find himself in this part of the city, Gotham's protector prefers to watch from the rooftops above, rather than actually be a part of the city he claims to love. So imagine Jason’s surprise when he walks into the bar to celebrate a particular annoying drug bust and sees the Golden Boy himself.

Jason spends a good minute and a half deliberating what to do. He comes to this bar for the sole purpose of avoiding the Bats. But he can't think of a reason Dick would show up in this dump. It's not even Nightwing looking to get answers for a case. It's Dick Grayson drowning himself in a couple of empty shot glasses and whatever he's currently nursing.

It’s not like Jason wants to be Dick's shoulder to cry on. He doesn't want to be anyone's shoulder to cry on! Maybe Barbra's… or Cass's. Maybe, if he's in the mood and the need to cry was world crashing. But Dick is in a place he is clearly not supposed to be, doing something that is uncharacteristically crazy for him.

Worse, right behind Bruce, Dick has one of the most recognizable faces in Gotham (one if the consequences of growing up under the shadow of Wayne Manor and Wayne Tower) and there are a lot of people in this bar who would like to take a crack at such a face; either to hold him for ransom or to symbolically smack frustration into the face of Gotham elite for so-called charity work.  Jason could see both happening. Or at least, attempted; no one in this bar could take on a Bat, even if Dick looks ready to blackout. Some people are already giving him some side looks that make Jason uneasy.

All this considered, Jason decides to take pity on the drunken brother. He walks up to the nearest end of the bar and asks for a draft beer. It's not exactly the liquor he's looking for to celebrate the bust, but it's better than nothing. After getting the cheap drink, he slides a stool next to Dick and claps him on the shoulder. That was a mistake.

Dick whips around and pulls a gun. "Dude!" Jason yells. "What the fuck you doing?"

"Jay?" Dick slurs. The gun dips towards the ground. Before Dick can do any damage with something he’d hate himself for, Jason grabs the top of the gun and pulls it out of his hand. He goes to unload it but finds the gun empty.

“What the actual hell Dickface?" If Dick is carrying around a gun, empty or not, it's worse than Jason originally thought. Jason’s not sure if he's okay with the fact that he got involved in something clearly out of his depth, but Dick clearly needs help.

"I didn't feel like becoming ransom." Dick's words spill out of his mouth without much control.

"So you carry around an unloaded gun? That doesn’t scare anyone in this town, you know that." Dick's response is a half shrug as his head falls onto his chest. "Do I even want to ask how much you've had to drink?" It takes him a few seconds, but Dick finally holds up four fingers. Jason doesn't believe that for a second. He looks to the bartender: a 50 some year old man who doesn’t seem to be paying attention to anything. "How much has he had?" Jason asks.

"Four," the bar tender answers.

"Four what?"

"Four tequila shots."

"Damn it, Dick." His brother may have been raised in galas, but he's still one the worst light weights Jason knows. Two shots of tequila tend to put Dick in a bad spot. This won't be a pretty night. Jason takes Dick's half full drink right out of his hand and takes a sip of straight whiskey. After letting the burn die down, he looks back to the man behind the bar and yells "why the hell would you give him a glass of whisky?!"

The old bar tender’s tired response is "I ain't his babysitter," and goes back to what he was doing before.

When Dick reaches out to take the whisky back, Jason slides it down the opposite end of the bar. It nearly falls completely off. "Asshole," Dick mumbles. Before he can attempt to oder a new one Jason stops him.

“The fuck you doing Dick?"

"None of your bees-wax little wing."

"Okay, are we twelve?" Dick's incredibly mature response is to stick his tongue out. "Do not make me be the big brother here."

It's a deep cut and Jason knows it. Dick's not exactly the best big brother, but he's been trying, much to Jason's protest. It started when he came back from the dead. Dick had been in too much of a pissing contest with Bruce to be much of a brother to Jason when he was alive the first time. When the long lost Robin returned, Dick took it upon himself to be "the brother Jason deserved" (and never wanted or needed).

"Don’t go there," Dick spits with bitterness. His face is pinched tight. But whether that pained expression is from Jason's insult or whatever caused this mood in the first place, Jason doesn't know. Probably both.

"Then don't act like it." Dick gives him the infamous Bat glare, which has little effect on a fellow former Bat, but at least he’s focused on something other than getting a new glass. "What are you doing here anyway?"

"B's full of shit."

"I could have told you that. I have told you that. But none of his shittyness has ever caused you, of all people, to do this. You've taken my spot at my bar and pulled gun. That’s my job. So what gives?"

Dick swallows hard. He takes a moment to collect himself then asks, "You know what day it is?"

"Ummm… Sunday…? Does it matter?"

"No. What date, Jay?"

Jason takes a second to think about. Soon realization dawned on him, resulting in him wanting to shove his fist into Bruce's skull.

Dick can see when Jason realizes the significance of the date. His response is to huff out a breath of hot air and pick up an old shot glass. Ignoring the fact that the glass is empty, Dick puts it to his lips, attempting to drink away reality.

Not needing or wanting to address the date, Jason asks, "What did he do?"

"Doesn't matter. I'll get over it."

"No you won't.”

"Nope. Honestly, I'll bury it. But what matters is the day he chose to be an ass."

Jason can’t argue with that. After a moment of silence, Jason asks, “Have you visited them today?" It's not a topic he wants to touch with a ten foot pole, but he'll go there for his grieving brother's sake.

"Yep. Still six feet under. Not much has changed."

And that's the saddest truth to the situation. No matter how many time Jason visits his mom, or how many flowers Dick takes to his parents on birthdays and anniversaries, no matter how many times Bruce broods over the Wayne family cemetery, the dead will stay buried; in all cases except him, it seems.  People say that time heals, but it that's the case, time is taking its sweet ass fucking time for all of them. Bruce knows exactly what watching parents die does to one's mind, even years and years after the event. Why he would choose today of all days to be a prick? Simply letting the date slip his mind isn't an excuse for the World's Greatest Detective. The goddamn time of his own parents death is the code to get into the man's personal military base for crying out loud. Forgetting one of the most important dates to your first adopted son is inexcusable. Hell, as depressing as it is, it's this date that brought Dick to Bruce; that brought Robin to Batman. The man has some fucking nerve.

This isn't the time or place to take Jason’s anger out on Bruce. For one, Bruce isn't even here. Second, Dick needs help now.  This is not normal for him and a choice few low-lives are again glancing at Dick with malice in the eyes. He's wants to get Dick out of here.

"Come on Dickiebird-"

"I'm not going to the manor. Or my place. I don't wanna see 'im."

"I'm an asshole Dickface; I'm not a monster. You're coming to my place. He won't bother you there."

Dick hesitates, but after a moment, he nods slowly and allows Jason to help him stand up. After assuring the bartender that he'll pay the tab tomorrow, Jason grabs his brother into a side hug and all but drags his brother to his motorcycle outside.  

Getting him on the bike isn't easy, but it's a hell of a lot easier than getting the acrobat up five flights of steps. His flexibility has always freaked Jason out, and when he's this out of it, Dick has very little control over him limbs. It's like trying to get cooked spaghetti to stand up straight.  But after about an hour of cursing and sheer determination, Jason is able to lie Dick down in his bed. He puts a trash can right next to Dick's faces and adds, "You throw up on my bed, you die Big Bird” before taking to the couch for the night.

The next morning, Jason is thoroughly entertained by making fun of a very hungover Nightwing, migraine be damned. Red Hood did miss out on celebrating his drug bust after all.

[awkward-whiteboy]

ANON ASK question

Sorry, Tumblr Mobile fucked up and posted it when I meant to save as draft

1: Name David 2: Age 19 3: 3 Fears dark, heights, someone staying in my life 4: 3 things I love Pugs Pandas Memes 5: 4 turns on Dimples, manors Eyes Booty 6: 4 turns off rudeness Controlling overlyobsessed egotistic 7: My best friend @rinkatai @aesthetichalestorm @bookerdewiit @pokemoncardinal and many more 8: Sexual orientation Male 9: My best first date Meeting her at wendys during her shift 10: How tall am I 6″2 11: What do I miss Being happy 12: What time were I born 4pm or 2am 13: Favorite color black 14: Do I have a crush Yes.. On someone I cant have 15: Favorite quote “I’m David and I’m a fucking piece of trash” - @awkward-whiteboy 16: Favorite place my mind. It’s dark, but I feel at home 17: Favorite food Potatoes breadsticks and chicken noodle soup 18: Do I use sarcasm Nope 19: What am I listening to right now People complain about  their exam grade 20: First thing I notice in new person Eyes 21: Shoe size 11.5 22: Eye color Hazel 23: Hair color Blackish brown 24: Favorite style of clothing Whatever I wear 25: Ever done a prank call? Nope 27: Meaning behind my URL I’m awkard white and a trash boy 28: Favorite movie Cure for Wellness 29: Favorite song Too many 30: Favorite band Too Many 31: How I feel right now Depress 32: Someone I love I rather not say publically, message me 1 on 1 33: My current relationship status ^^^ 34: My relationship with my parents Okay 35: Favorite holiday Leif Erkison 36: Tattoos and piercing i have None... YET 37: Tattoos and piercing i want? I got a guitar quote thingy I am saving to get 38: The reason I joined Tumblr Because I like pissing people off, and when I joined, straight, white, males were the most hated people on tumblr. 39: Do I and my last ex hate each other? .... This is too dark to write about, plus someone is reading over my shoulder as I write this. (MESSAGE 1ON1 FOR MORE) 40: Do I ever get “good morning” or “good night ” texts? Nope, dont remember really ever getting any 41: Have I ever kissed the last person you texted? Nope, wish I could 42: When did I last hold hands? Don’t remember 43: How long does it take me to get ready in the morning? either 4 mins or 30 minutes 44: Have You shaved your legs in the past three days? guys shave their legs? 45: Where am I right now? Michigan State University 46: If I were drunk & can’t stand, who’s taking care of me? No one probably 47: Do I like my music loud or at a reasonable level? Loud 48: Do I live with my Mom and Dad? Both, when im not at college 49: Am I excited for anything? Nope 50: Do I have someone of the opposite sex I can tell everything to? Sort of. I don’t share everything 51: How often do I wear a fake smile? All the damn time 52: When was the last time I hugged someone? Don’t remember 53: What if the last person I kissed was kissing someone else right in front of me? Happened before... just cry... again 54: Is there anyone I trust even though I should not? ALOT OF PEOPLE 55: What is something I disliked about today? I have my hellhole class 56: If I could meet anyone on this earth, who would it be? Living: Nikki Sixx Dead: Carl Sagen 57: What do I think about most? why people hate me 58: What’s my strangest talent? eating an ungodly amount of sour candy, and chugging lemon  juice really fast 59: Do I have any strange phobias? not really 60: Do I prefer to be behind the camera or in front of it? behind. I’m ugly 61: What was the last lie I told? I’m okay 62: Do I prefer talking on the phone or video chatting online? video chat, which ends up being no camera 63: Do I believe in ghosts? How about aliens? I take a class about this stuff. So I know way too much about this stuff 64: Do I believe in magic? ^^^ 65: Do I believe in luck? ^^^ 66: What’s the weather like right now? cold, and warm #puremichigan 67: What was the last book I’ve read? College textbook. (I really love it) 68: Do I like the smell of gasoline? I think?  69: Do I have any nicknames? CHEF GODDAMNIT DAVID 70: What was the worst injury I’ve ever had? broken toe, 71: Do I spend money or save it? both 72: Can I touch my nose with a tongue? nope 73: Is there anything pink in 10 feet from me? a girls jacket 74: Favorite animal? panda pug 75: What was I doing last night at 12 AM? crying and studying 76: What do I think is Satan’s last name is? ALLEN.................. 77: What’s a song that always makes me happy when I hear it? High Hopes 78: How can you win my heart? Be nice and show me pictures of pugs and have sour candy 79: What would I want to be written on my tombstone? “Goddamnit David” 80: What is my favorite word? FUCK and other words 81: My top 5 blogs on tumblr I don’t really have favorites, I love all the people I reblog from and those that do the same to me :) 82: If the whole world were listening to me right now, what would I say? Don’t listen to me 83: Do I have any relatives in jail? Probably 84: I accidentally eat some radioactive vegetables. They were good, and what’s even cooler is that they endow me with the super-power of my choice! What is that power? Invisibility and mind reading 85: What would be a question I’d be afraid to tell the truth on? Who I love 86: What is my current desktop picture? a graveyard where a tombstone says “Here lies Davids hopes and dreams” 87: Had sex? Yee 88: Bought condoms? Yee 89: Gotten pregnant? NO 90: Failed a class? Currently I am xD 91: Kissed a boy? Nope 92: Kissed a girl? Yep, 6 93: Have I ever kissed somebody in the rain? Yes.. Bad memories of them 94: Had job? Legally.. No 95: Left the house without my wallet? Yep, just did yesterday 96: Bullied someone on the internet? Never bullied, furthest I went was being a bitch to a kid on an online game. kid said if his father hears one more swear word he is grounded, I said “Well you’re father sounds like a lil bitch” 97: Had sex in public? I plead the 5th 98: Played on a sports team? A long time ago 99: Smoked weed? Yes 100: Did drugs? 5th again 101: Smoked cigarettes?^^ 102: Drank alcohol? Yes, a long time ago 103: Am I a vegetarian/vegan? Nope 104: Been overweight? Nope 105: Been underweight? EVERY DAMN DAY 106: Been to a wedding? Yes, at least 5 107: Been on the computer for 5 hours straight? Yes 108: Watched TV for 5 hours straight? Nope 109: Been outside my home country? Nope 110: Gotten my heart broken? way too many times. Do i have a heart stil? 111: Been to a professional sports game? Yep, a few 112: Broken a bone? Yes, pinky toe 113: Cut myself? I don’t know..

114: Been to prom? TOO MANY BAD MEMORIES.....

115: Been in airplane? Yes 116: Fly by helicopter? FTTTFTTTTTTTTTTT yes! 117: What concerts have I been to? Motley Crue 2x, Alice cooper 3x, Deep Purple, Edgar Winter Band, Iron Maiden, FFDP, Valraven, Wayland, StoneSour, Alter Bridge, and Skillet. Might go see Judas Priest in winter 118: Had a crush on someone of the same sex? Nope 119: Learned another language? German, and a little Russian 120: Wore make up? Yes 121: Lost my virginity before I was 18? HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH yes 122: Had oral sex? Yes 123: Dyed my hair? Yep, I suck at it 124: Voted in a presidential election? Sadly 125: Rode in an ambulance? Nope 126: Had a surgery? Nope 127: Met someone famous? A few people 128: Stalked someone on a social network? Yes, for their protection. 129: Peed outside? Yea 130: Been fishing? Yep, I like it for the quiet 131: Helped with charity? Yes, Red cross and food banks 132: Been rejected by a crush? :’( Atleast 5 times 133: Broken a mirror? Nope 134: What do I want for birthday? someone who will understand me and not judge

Ask me stuff :3 (ask as anon though)

[wellsjahasghost]

Hi! Just wanted to let you know that I really enjoy your fics! I was even thinking about printing out Survivor's Guilt so I could put it on my bookshelf. Read it 2x so far and the beach scene made me cry every single time! And your Reincarnation AU: the accuracy of your research, amazing! How did you actually decide on which places and historical events you wanted to use? And were there some you really wanted to but stayed a draft? Do you want to give us a tease? Keep up the work! Thank you :)

………PRINTING IT OUT AND PUTTING IT ON YOUR BOOKSHELF?? Im speechless ??? NEVER IN A MILLION YEARS WOULD I HAVE EVER THOUGHT SOMEONE WOULD LIKE SOMETHING I WROTE /THAT MUCH/

before i truly start crying let me actually answer ur question perhaps… under the cut.

I knew HYSA was gonna start roughly 1000 AD and I initially wanted to try and get a lifetime from each century leading up to canon. I literally googled “world events 11th century” “world events 12th century” etc to find stuff I might be interested in LMAO… I made a list of events and chose from there. That’s how I came up with the Jerusalem plot, and the Khan Dynasty (honestly, as soon as I saw Genghis Khan had a half-brother named “Belgutei” I was sold). I also really wanted pirates!bellarke and witch trials!bellarke so I did some research into lesser known pirate locations and witch trials. And I also wanted a lifetime in the Philippines to honour Bellamy’s heritage so that’s where the orphanage one came in. Then there was SO MUCH STUFF from the 19th/20th century that I had trouble choosing. Did I want to do 1920s gangsters!Bellarke, Titanic!Bellarke, Victorian!Bellarke, WWII!Bellarke, or ? I eventually went with Cold War Bellarke because I had a brain wave to use the Berlin Wall as a device to keep them apart, lol.

BUT WAIT. Let me tell you about this ONE life that I actually spent time developing that I never got to put in. YUKON GOLD RUSH BELLARKE: Bellamy is a prospector looking for Gold, stops for supplies in the shop that Clarke works in. They decide to get married to take advantage of a loophole in the law which I found on Wikipedia aka the most reliable source to exist:

Under Canadian law, miners first had to get a license, either when they arrived at Dawson or en route from Victoria in Canada.[161] They could then prospect for gold and, when they had found a suitable location, lay claim to mining rights over it.[162] To stake a claim, a prospector would drive stakes into the ground a measured distance apart and then return to Dawson to register the claim for $15 ($410).[162] This normally had to be done within three days, and by 1897 only one claim per person at a time was allowed in a district, although married couples could exploit a loophole that allowed the wife to register a claim in her own name, doubling their amount of land.

ANYWAY, you can see how this lifetime was gonna go. Basically a fake marriage AU. I ended up not doing it because the emotional storyline felt too similar to other lifetimes that ended up in the fic, but I still really love the plot bunny. 

Also…. in my earliest idea of this fic, Bellarke never remember each other UNTIL the canon lifetime… and there is no end to their reincarnation; they simply find each other again in the post-canon life. Obviously, this isn’t what happened in the final fic, but I actually did write these scenes before I decided to change it, so since you asked for a tease….

Many years— decades— pass.

It turns out if earth doesn’t kill them, their bodies do. Cancer should be expected, really, after all they are living on a radiation soaked planet, and their bodies are only barely equipped to metabolize it all. It only makes sense that it would all slow down at some point, and Earth would catch up with them in the end.

(But they ran as fast as they could until then.)

Now Clarke is nearing her time, unable to move from her bed, and Bellamy is afraid. He’s got the cancer too, but she’s worse.

She’s going to die soon, and he’s terrified.

He voices this, and Clarke reaches up with one near-emaciated hand to tug at one of his curls. He can see just enough of it in his vision to see the silver in it. “At least we got to grow old,” she tells him, voice raspier than usual. “Not everyone can say that.”

They’re not that old, although they look it, he supposes. Clarke’s got more lines around her eyes, around her mouth in laugh lines. Some of them are from age. Some from illness. Either way, she’s his best friend, and so she’s beautiful.

He takes her hand, interlacing their fingers. “I’m gonna miss you.”

“Not for long,” she says lightly, and he huffs a laugh.

“You think?” He’s always argued that their remembrance of their past lives broke the curse, that this life is the last one for them.

But she’s always argued different. “I know,” she says, fervently.

She exclaims it so passionately, looking so earnestly into his eyes, that he feels he has no choice to believe it. It makes his heart hurt less, at least. He leans down to press a kiss to her forehead, but she makes a noise, tilting her head up. He hesitates, because he doesn’t want to kiss her lips, waste what little energy she has left, but she’s looking at him with a kind of fierce desperation— desperation for him— that he feels he has no choice but to concede.

When their lips touch, she surges up with surprising strength to kiss him properly.

He gets lost in it a moment too long and she falls back into the pillows with a tired huff. He instantly feels guilty, but there’s a brightness to her eyes from the kiss, and he would never wish that wasn’t there.

“Kiss me as soon as you see me in the next life,” he tells her, trying to keep his tears at bay with a joke. “So we don’t waste any time.”

Clarke smiles a little painfully and says, “It was  never a waste of time.”

“I know,” he replies softly. She’s not done, continuing earnestly.

“Just getting to know you before any of this— before remembering any of the lives we’ve lived before— was one of the happiest parts of my life.”

He knows that. “Is,” he corrects. “Is one of the happiest parts of our life.”

She doesn’t answer. The light is fading from her eyes now; the blue, roaring oceans of her irises fade into blue paint dry on a canvas, nothing compared to the real thing. This is it, he thinks, and an anxious feeling rises in his chest. He’s just— he’s not ready. He’s not ready to live his life without her, however brief it might be.

He squeezes her hand. “May we meet again,” he manages to say through his tears.

He doesn’t expect her to say anything more, but she does, a cracked whisper using up the last air in her lungs— and her mouth turning up in something of a smile at the end.

“We will.”

YEAR 2300

She sees him for the first time in the Skybus terminal.

He’s on the other side of it, and yet he catches her eye immediately. Dark haired, wearing a blue jacket and black jeans with boots the other side of the terminal he turns around suddenly, as if sensing her watching. She sits up straighter without meaning to. He stops in his tracks.

Their gazes lock, and then collide.

His eyes are dark brown, so dark in the low light of the cloudy day that she really shouldn’t know their colour. But inexplicably, she is hit with a strong sense of deja vu.

And with that thought, comes a landslide of others.

Snippets of things, really— lips on her lips, warm and comforting, hands touching her skin, a deliriously giddy feeling taking flight and then settling back low and warm in her chest over and over and over again, and fire. So much fire.

But even through the fire, she hears his voice. Gravelly, pitched low. But it’s there. It makes something stir restlessly in her soul in yearning. In familiarity. Some deep part of her just knows that voice is his— belonging to the dark-haired man in front of her.

All this happens in the space of a single breath, and when she exhales, so does he. They stare at each other for another second, and she’d almost think that he’s sorting through the same questions in his head.

Then, unexpectedly: He tips his head and smiles at her.

It’s a small and slow one and maybe even a little shy. And yet, it bedazzles her, strikes her speechless. She’s buoyed by it, even though maybe he’s not feeling the same thing— maybe they’ve just been staring at each other too long to be socially acceptable so he felt like he had to. But that doesn’t stop her from giving him a very overeager sort of wave from across the terminal.

His smile doesn’t fade, and she finds her own lips stretching into one as well. I know him, her heart sings. And he’s home.

He comes closer, and he’s heading for the same gate, she realizes with a start, that her flight is on. “Hi,” she says to him.

A pause. He blinks at the sound of her voice. Then:

“Hi, Clarke,” he says.

Her heart rattles. The way he says her name is extraordinary— his deep voice softens like butter around it, and she’s electrified. “How’d— how’d you know my name?” she asks.

He nods over to her boarding pass that she’s clutching onto. Looking down, she realizes that her name is boldly printed there in plain sight. “Oh,” she laughs a little, ducking her head at her own foolishness. But it’s funny, because— she could’ve sworn he just knew it.

His small smile widens almost imperceptibly. “I’m Bellamy,” he tells her, and she nods because that sounds about right.

“Bellamy,” she repeats, tasting the word on her tongue. It’s sweet.

He nods and hitches his bag higher onto his shoulder. “Nice to meet you.” It’s the polite thing to say, but it feels sincere somehow. There’s a beat of silence, and then, almost as if struggling with it, he slowly slides his gaze away from her and walks away, towards the departure gate.

She watches him stroll away, rooted to the bench yet simultaneously feeling like an invisible rope is tugging her towards him. She is seized with a strange desire to go after this stranger and only barely manages to fight it back. She doesn’t know him, she tells herself. At least, not yet. She can’t just run after him right now. She’ll probably see him on the plane; and if not, she’ll find him in Arrivals.

Decided, Clarke settles back into her chair, but keeps her eyes on the man until he disappears from sight into the throng of people. Instantly, she feels that urge swell up again but she squashes it. She’ll find him later. There’s no need to rush, after all. 

They’ve got all the time in the world.

You’ll recognize some of those lines because I recycled them into the actual fic haha. I do that a lot. The last bit, with them in the Sky terminal, was me filling a prompt that came into my inbox– that prompt is actually what inspired me to write this entire fic, and it didn’t even make it into the fic ! lmao. Anyway, I hope you enjoyed a little insight into my writing process, and thank you for your question! I’m super flattered that you were interested in knowing. :’)

[innerheadstories]

My First story post and a very very rough draft.

"Why in the hell did we have to take this route" One of the merchants asked as they pushed threw the thick forest path that had becomes so overgrown in recent time the path was nearly gone. So even with the strong hourses they had for travel it was still hard to get threw with there carts.       "Stop ya belly aching" The other merchant grumbled. "Your the one who wasnted to spend all your time drinking and whoring around in the last village and cost us all that extra time. So if we dont take this path we wont be able to reach Isenberg in time for the festivle" He said annoyed.         The other growned as he led the horse threew the trail having to give it a little extra tug as the wheels had a hard time getting over some of the larger tree roots. "YA but isnt this path notrious for badit attacks. " The other man rolled his eyes. "Oh they say that about every forest path its always badits or mosnters or somthing its nothing more than fear and cowrdice" he said as he contued on.       Of course even thought he said that it didnt mean going threw this path didnt put him more on edge. He kept his dagger close at hand and his ears open.  Although thinking about it now. It was qiet errily so. There was no sound of small animals scurring threw the bush and no birds chirping near by or making calls looking for a mate.  He looked around trying to hear anything that signaled any sighn of life.  

        As they got deeper into the woods and the day grew later it got harded to travel thats when finally they herd it. Snapping of twig. Turning quickly towrs the sound the merchant saw giant of a man coming into view. He had a sick grin as he held a large bloody mace in his hand "Well well what have we got here seemes some travlers got lost in our woods mates." He cuckled as more snapping could be heard and men began coming out of the of the foiliage and from the tree branches above one man had a bow drawn with a arrow aimes right at them. "what a pitty." He said       The large man looked at them ."Well we can show you the way out of course....you have to pay the charge for passing threw our territory" The merchants both huddled close to there items. "Please ...please just let us go" He said as he looked around ath the large number of men gathering. "We are only simple merchants we dont have much but we will give you our money to pass." The other merchant looked at him. "What are you saying." the other one turned quickly to glare at him. "Shut up we can make more money cant make any money if we are dead."          The larger leader laughed as he started forward. "Smart man" He grinned ."And if you dont have enogh we will also be taking your wares." He siad. But before he gotwith striking distance a arrow shot down from the tree tops and into the ground in fornt of him. All the badits looked aroound the one with his bow shooting a arrow back in the direction of that the other ahd shot from but all that could be herd was tthe arrow passing threw tree leaves and branches. .  "what the hell was that " The leader of the group growled.        Suddenly a new voice was herd laughing . "My my what greddy little men you are moeny and their wares how bothersome." The voice seemed to come from the woods themselvs. "And what was about your woods." The laugher was deep and harmoic even the voice was smooth and deep and seemed to resenate  "Please no mere mortal could hope to own these woods or any woods." The voice said. "This forest as all forest is home of the elven people and belogns to no one." Finally a man dropped down from the foilage and landed on a tree branch. He had a bow and arrow quiver on his back as he held a staff in his hands. Although it seemed to be a simple wooden staff it had a beautful red wood color to it with a small blue crystal knessled inside the top of it.  His black hair was long and held small braides near the top to keep it somwhat pulled back behind his ears. His ears were pointed and his skin was a deep copper tone and completly umblemised and looks smooth as silk. His green eyes seemed to dance with amuzment and mischef. "Well well what a truly distubing sight." He said with a grin.     The leader of the bandits glared at the elf. "Who the hell are you."        The elf smiled "How rude of me not to introduce myself Galland at your service .....Well not your service" HE smiled "Morley the service of ....well the whole world I would assume I dont imagin anyone will miss you but the world will be better with you gone from it." HE said. THe man laughed "You gonna do us in little man with what that little stick of yours." He chuckled as he grabbed his crouch. "Me cocks bigger than that little thing." He said "But Ill tell ya what come down here and Ill shove that stick right up your arse and let you wobble home." He smiled befor shaking his head. "Nah Think Ill just use me little stick here to rip your guts out  instead." The man glared as he looked at him then singlaed at his bowman "Kill that little fairy and be done with him." No sooner had he spoke than the man kniocked another arrow and fired at him. The elf grinned twisting and his body and snached the arrow from thre air. "Your quiet good with that." He smiled "But Im better" the man growled and quickly knoked another aroow firing at him and in one swift motion the elf had droped down and using his legs swung around hanging upside down from the treelimb he knoked the arrow he had snacked from the air and shot it back at the man The arrow planted in a tree behind him.    The bowman laughed "Cant be that good ya missed" AS he went to knock another arrow thogh he relesed the elf had actully shot the sting of his bow. His eyes wideneed as the elf grinned "Oh did I" He let got and twisted his body landing on the groud ad putting his bow back on his back. "ALright enogh of this get him boys." The leader gorlwed as they all began converging on the elf. He laughed "Oh dear. He quickly grabbed his staff and blocked the first man to get to him twisting it and knicking the mans blade away before using the end to jab him and knicked im to the ground as another man came at his back he shoved the staff back hitting him in the gut as well with ther head before twisiting around and knicking him from his feet. All this before the gang leader moved over raising his mace. "Try and stop this pretty boy" He snalred swinging his mace down with enogh force that it would snap any nomral weapon in half But just before it connected with the stafft it hit someinviable wall and a shokwave blasted out knocking everyone back. The elf spun his staff around with a laugh "What was that about little twig." HE grinned as he swung it in a wide arc and the jewl in the top glowed as the roots and vines began to come out of the ground and twist around the badnits. The men grolwed and all began wilding choping and slashing at the vines and roots that seemed to have taken a mind of their own as they tried to contrict and wrap around them.The badit leader rared ripping the roots away from him as he rushed the elf. "My my you are a strong one. The male said in a cocky tone as the leader swung wildly at him. The elf smiled as he twisted and ducked around the manes wild swings while the leader tried to keep his feet it seemed the more vines and roots he ripped from the ground focing himself onward the more wrapped around him and tried harder to pull him down. The elf smiled "Seems you having trouble there."  The badit leader swung at him one final time and the elf hoped back holding his hands out he flicked his fingers at the man and the vines wrapped around his writs and arms pulling him to the ground. All right eveyrone time to rest for now."  constricting them and  covering there mouths as the forest itself seemed to suck them into nothing ness as they were pulled into the ground.  The badits thrashs and swung there weapoins widley trying to stop themselves from being pulled into the ground screaming and crying out for mercy. Untill only the badit leader was left. HE strugled agest the vines as he grabbed and tryed ripping them away. "G...god damnit im....im not gonna die to some little fucking elf "  The elf lagughed. "Well I would love to see how your gonna stop me." HE told him as he watched him. BEfore the vines finally took him underground and sucked him into the earth like a living burial. He smiled before turing back ot the merchants who were brushing themselves off and getting to their feet. They looked fearfully at the male elf     "P...please sir we dont want no trouble we just be passing threw."            Galland laughed "Please Im not gonna hurt you." He smiled "Wouldnt have made much sense to save you if I ment you harm" He smiled as he moved his staff to his back and walked over to them with his hands behind his head. "If you keep on the path here you should find the village by tomarow morning ....midday if you stop to sleep for the night." He told them. The both smiled before the one in back came forward. "Please sir if there is anything we can do for you just say it." The elf waved his hand dimissivly before thinking ."Actully Im fresh out of wine so if you could spare a bottle of summer wine I would be most thankfull" The mechant laughed "your in luck I got a wonderfull selection of summer wine just for the festivle" He smiled as he went back to his cart and opened the carrage before pulling out a large bottle of red wine. "HEre a wonderfull wine from the east lands."  The elf smiled as he held the bottle up to the light "Ahhh this lookes eccelent" He smiled "My deepest gratidute." He said AS he began to walk away.     "Wait." One of the men called out "Why not travle with us to the festivle I am sure there would be plenty of other summer wines and we would gladly compensate you for guiding us and protecting us from danger"      The elf shook his head. "You shall be fine this lot was the only badit group currently in the area.' HE smiled "I may see you at the festive" He held up wanted posters "But for now I have bounty to collect' He told them with a chuckle. "Thank you for your help by the way saved me the trouble of having to find them. Oh one last thing could you tell the gaurd in town that they need to come collect these gentalmen." He laughed. agin AS he jumped into the trees and was soon gone from sight..        As instruced once the merchants reached town they went directly to the town gaurds to inform them of what had happened and the gaurds only smiled and nodded thanking them for their information.           As a unit of gaurd entered the forest the had hauled along a large empty cage that was used for prsnor traspoert.       "Captain how far into the woods is this elf."    The captain laughed ."I forgot your new to the regiment arent you." The gaurd nodded as the second one laughed. "Galland is one of the best ounty hunters in this part of the world" He told him as the captain nodded ."While normally elfs only creat problems or hold a sens of self importance Galland is a decent enogh ort he hunts for money and enjoys our festivles." He smiled "Never a bad drinking compainon either. The one gaurd rolled his eyes ."Please eveyone knows elefes look down their noses at us and every other race." He said almost annoyed That was untill they herd the soft melody of the violen that seemed to be carried by the wind into the tranquil forst.      The captain smiled "Ahhh we are getting close." The other gaurd rased a eyebrow, "Is he the one playing." the captain nodded as the contued to move.        Sure enogh they soon came to the area the merchants had left hours before. And sitting atop a tree branch was the male elft he had one leg on the branch with him while his other dnageld care free from the brach while he placyed the violen he held in his skilled hands. his eyes where closed and the soft melody of his instument seemed to only make the forest that much more tranquiel. It was only being so close one would notice the sliet movment of his lips. He was ...singing the elven voice travles threw the trees and with the music in such a way it wouldnt be until you saw him singing that you even relised there were words to accompany the melody.       The new gaurd began to move forward as if he were going ot adress the elev before the captain placed a hand on his shoulder. "Dont worry he knows we are here."    ...It was a moment or two before the male finished his song. As he did he opened his eyes though looking down at the men. "Ahhh captain wonderfull to see you as always." He said hopping down from the tree and landing skillfully on his feet in front of the men.            "Good to see you Galland I hear you have a prisnor delvery for us"     Galland smiled "I may do you have a bounty for me" He asked raiseing his eyebrows playfully" The captain chuckled as the other graurd cleared his throat. "Captain we dont have time for this besides I dont even see any bandits around here" The elef smiled looking over the captain at the one who had spoke. "But my lad they are in ground in the trees cant you sense them all around you"      THe gaurd looked at him "What kind of elf nonsens it that we came to collocet prsnors not hear some natrulist proverbs about eveyone being connected." He glared      Galland laughed "My my captain your new man dosnt seem to like me very much" The captain laughed "Well you are more of a aquired taste" The elf looked offdendn playfull "Oh you wound me sir and I thought we were frineds." HE smiled as he clapped his hands out ouf of the trees and from the ground the bandits were reveald all their hands and legs bound with vines "Mabey I should give thses to someone eles then." The captain laughed as the new recutte jumped as one came up almost form directly under him. Motioning to the two the other gaurd patted the new guy on the shoulder and helped him beging loading the badits into the cage while The captain pulled out a small bag of gold coins. "As always you never dissapoint." The elf smile "I live to please" He smile taking the bag and shaking it before putting it in his shirt. "Your a man of your word I dont think I should need to count it." The captain shook his head. "That attidufde will get you killed somday." Galladn grinned "Yes but today is not that day" He smiled as the captain shook his head while he and his men turned the cart around and began heading out  "Allow me to play you off" He smiled as he jumped back into the tree picking up his istument agin and before long the gaurds could hear the melody of the elves playing once agin accompining them on their way out of the deepe woods.