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asdfghjklmals · 11 months

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THE CURSED CHILD: YUTA OKKOTSU✩༶‧˚

GENRE + T/W: sfw, fluff, angst. mentions of unaliving from jjk0. WORD COUNT: 2.6k words. TAGS: satoru gojo x fem!oc, established couple. student!yuta x sensei!oc, strictly student and sensei, nothing innappropriate.

SYNOPSIS: oc gojo girlfriend and satoru save a student from a secret execution, and his name is yuta okkotsu. AUTHOR'S NOTE: my take on how oc gojo girlfriend would've met yuta and how yuta sees her. this is the start of a new mini series called the cursed child(ren), and it's basically how oc gojo girlfriend meets satoru's students. REMINDER: if you want to imagine yourself in oc gojo girlfriend's character descriptions instead, please do!

it was your lunch hour at jujutsu high, and satoru was hiding in your office. and when you say hiding, you meant that he was avoiding his sensei duties.

“you can’t stay in here, i have to leave soon.”

you sat in satoru’s lap as he brushed your black hair behind your ear, “where are you going?” he asked curiously.

“the school directors said that there’s an issue at one of the public high schools. i’m guessing a curse they need someone higher than a grade one sorcerer for.” you muttered. you wondered why the other sorcerers couldn’t handle the issue. you rarely went on missions nowadays.

“i can go with you if you want.” satoru suggested.

you looked at him and glared, “you promised maki that you’d help her with her close combat, so no.” satoru had three first year students this year: maki zen’nin, toge inumaki, and panda.

“we haven’t been on a mission together in awhile haven’t we?” satoru reminisced, “we used to have so much fun when we were students, don’t you think?”

you thought about yours and satoru’s routine when you were younger. you would drop off megumi and tsumiki at their elementary school, grab lunch at your favorite cafe in shinjuku, complete your mission, and then grab dessert. those were the times. (read 'seeing red' here)

“unfortunately we’re adults and have real responsibilities now. like looking after the students and raising teenagers.” you chuckled, “i have to go, sweetheart.”

you caressed satoru’s cheek with your left hand and kissed him goodbye. he pulled you closer before you started to giggle, “satoru! i have to go now!”

the sly sorcerer snuck two more kisses before letting you go. you blew him a kiss before shutting your office door behind you, leaving him with his signature shit-eating grin.

the school directors’ meeting room

“so you want me to go find a child? for a secret execution?” you couldn’t believe your ears. how could these rude, old school directors expect you to bring a child back for them to execute? your motherly instincts started to kick in. you could never imagine executing a child the age of megumi and tsumiki.

"there are reports that there is child by the name of yuta okkotsu that is harboring a special grade cursed apparition by the name of rika orimoto." the school director stated.

another school director added, "he's already injured four of the high school students, three grade two sorcerers, and a grade one sorcerer."

"and you're asking me to retrieve the child because the grade one sorcerer couldn't do it?" you asked, annoyance in your tone. you were rarely ever summoned for missions due to the fact that you could heal. healers were important to the jujutsu community, so they were usually the last ones summoned.

"precisely. bring him back to us."

you left the directors' meeting room and rolled your eyes. throughout the years of being a special grade sorcerer, you and satoru shared one thing in common: your hatred for the directors and their old school way of thinking. you were glad yours and satoru's grandparents weren't so old-fashioned.

the only reason why the directors didn't turn to satoru is because they wanted a secret execution. if satoru knew about this, he would've intervened as the gojo clan's influence would allow him to do so. you didn't agree with the secret execution either, but you knew that they turned to you instead of satoru because they hated to ask that man for anything. you would tell satoru as soon as you got back.

sugisawa third high school

akari drove you to the school that yuta okkotsu was held up at. as you pulled into the parking lot, you felt the cursed energy radiating from inside the school. it was a vast amount, something that you haven't felt in a very long time. it also felt familiar, similar to satoru's.

"that's not a good feeling", akari said from the front of the car, shuddering as she sensed the cursed energy as well, "you sure you'll be okay? does gojo know you're here?"

"it's fine, akari. i can handle it. satoru is busy with his firsts years right now."

"be safe, (y/n)." akari said as she saluted you.

you nodded to her and set the veil, raising your two fingers, "emerge from darkness, blacker still. purify that which is impure."

a veil started to surround the school. you summoned your shikigami spirit birds. they flew around for a moment as their feathers started to ruffle. that meant that they sensed danger. they flew a few feet ahead of you as you summoned 24 ice shards, circling you. (a/n: did anyone notice that oc gojo girlfriend can now summon 24 shards compared to 12 when she was younger in older fics? she's even stronger in the present.)

you walked into the school and could sense intense cursed energy coming from the classroom that yuta was supposedly in. you opened the door to see him. he was having a complete mental breakdown. his hands enclosed his face, body crouched in a corner, hyperventilating. you waved away your ice shards as they melted into thin air. he was not a threat to you.

"are you yuta okkotsu?" you asked him.

he looked up and shouted, "stay away!"

you stayed calm as force was not going to be helpful here, "yuta, my name is (y/n) (l/n). i'm here to help you." you reached out to him.

yuta's eyes filled with tears, begging. "stay away. i don't want to hurt anyone. everyone that was sent here was hurt because of me."

"don't worry. you can't hurt me, yuta." you said as you crept closer to him. he winced as if he was anticipating something to hurt you. you summoned your water veil, enclosing yourself in a ball of water that made you untouchable to most curses and cursed techniques.

you reached your hand out of your veil of water, "come with me, yuta. there's someone i want you to meet, his name is satoru gojo. we can help you control this curse and help people with it. you won't have to hurt anyone anymore."

yuta looked up at you reluctantly, he slowly reached out to grab your hand. you quickly pushed into his pressure points on his forehead and knocked him out. (a/n: yup, just like satoru did to yuji) you summoned a water veil around him. before you took yuta out of the classroom, you noticed a knife that was turned into a tangled and twisted dagger.

"spirit birds... take that knife. bring it back to satoru."

your spirit birds took the knife and stored it in their shadows. they loved satoru, so they were happy to bring him a gift. you started to think your spirit birds liked him more than they liked you.

you drew the veil down as you walked towards the car.

"akari, call satoru right now. have him meet me in the dungeon."

"got it."

at the jujutsu high dungeon

satoru examined the knife that your spirit birds had brought back to him, "so, the elders went behind my back and asked my own girlfriend to bring them a child to execute?"

you ignored his recap of your story, "we have to save him, satoru."

"of course i'll save him. he's only 16 and underage. who do those damn higher ups think they are?" he said angrily.

you suggested to him, "we can teach him how to control this curse. i'm sure of it. there's no reason to execute him. what do you think about him joining maki, panda, and toge?"

"i think it would be a good idea."

"he's been through a lot," you sighed as you looked at the student who was sitting in the chair, tied up, and out cold. ofudas and different jujutsu seals were painted all over this dungeon.

satoru patted your shoulder, comforting you while you both looked at yuta. you rested your head against satoru's arm as you held his hand.

"did you sense the cursed apparition while you were at the school?" he asked curiously.

"i just sensed what you're sensing right now. the cursed apparition didn't appear when i got to him."

"i see. i'll take care of things, babe. just leave it to me."

the next day

satoru had met with the school directors right after you told him about yuta. and of course, he was able to get yuta's execution suspended. in return, he would have to take him in as a student so that jujutsu high could learn more about the special grade curse that attached itself yuta.

you made sure that yuta had his dorm room accommodations, that his student id card was made, and that he had a uniform ready to go for his first day.

"you really want to give him a white uniform?" you frowned. you thought that white uniforms were ostracizing. white meant that your powers were unstable, and it was something that you had to wear briefly when you first joined jujutsu high over ten years ago.

"he'll get out of the white uniforms in no time." satoru said confidently, "i know you hate putting the kids in white uniforms because it reminds you of when we were students." he kissed your temple.

you handed him a packet of all of yuta's paperwork and his student id.

"he's a special grade." you said to satoru as you looked at yuta's student id card.

"just like you and me." satoru grinned.

"should we go escort him from the dorms?" you asked your boyfriend. he smiled at you and looped your arms around his, clasping his palms together to teleport you both to the courtyard.

*********************************

yuta's first day of school was eye opening for him. satoru mentioned that he assigned yuta on a mission with maki. he was able to save the two missing children at the elementary school and an injured maki, and exorcise the curse by summoning rika orimoto (satoru got an earful for that one).

it was the moment where maki asked yuta why he enrolled at jujutsu high where yuta realized what he wanted to do. he didn't want to hurt anyone anymore. originally, he had wanted to run away and disappear forever, but satoru had told him that he would be lonely if he did that.

yuta wanted to be surrounded by people, he wanted to be relied on by others, and he wanted to believe that it was okay for him to keep living.

three months later

yours and satoru's main goal in life now that you two were older? it was to create a supportive environment to raise intelligent allies. both of you promised to protect the up and coming generation of jujutsu sorcerers, making sure that they would never have their youth taken away like satoru's was taken from him. (read 'learn to love' here)

the past three months, yuta had made tremendous progress as a sorcerer. he trained hard every day. he was even able to defeat suguru geto during the night parade of a thousand demons...

today, you were having your quarterly meeting with the students at tokyo jujutsu high. this meeting was a review of the quarter, a chance to catch up with the students to see how they were doing, and to see what they needed to do to be on track for high school graduation and their promotions to the next grade of sorcerer.

yuta knocked on your office door. he was right on time for his 1pm appointment.

"come in." you called out. putting his folder at the top of the stack of folders you had on your desk.

"hi (y/n)-sensei." he said with a smile.

you smiled back at him, "hi yuta. how are you doing?"

"i'm doing fine. is gojo-sensei doing okay?" he asked with concern. satoru had taken some time for himself after the incident with suguru last week. you knew he was at home collecting his thoughts and deciding how to be present for his students after losing his bestfriend for a second time. (read 'to be present' here)

"he's having a hard time, but he will be okay." you reassured him, "yuta, satoru wanted me to ask you if you would like to do some private training in africa."

"africa? that's pretty far." yuta said, "and that would mean that i would have to leave maki, inumaki, and panda..." he sounded sad when he mentioned his friends.

you related with him, seeing that it was going to be a hard decision for him, "i understand if you don't want to go. all your friends are here. i would've felt the same if i had to leave satoru and shoko."

"would i get stronger if i went, (y/n)-sensei...?" yuta asked quietly.

you watched yuta as he shifted in his chair, he was looking down at his feet.

"you would gain valuable experience by going. yuta, you're going to be such a strong sorcerer when you get older. hell, you're already so strong compared to most sorcerers your age. i know even megumi looks up to you." you said to him.

"if i can get stronger and protect the people i love, i'll do it." he confidently said.

"well... that didn't take much convincing." you chuckled as yuta blushed. "you can always come home whenever you want too. don't worry about the finances and lodging, i'll take care of everything for you." you smiled at him.

"you really are the best, (y/n)-sensei..." yuta said softly with a smile, "so, who's going to be training me while i'm there?"

you grinned from ear to ear as you remembered interrogating a specific sorcerer with satoru, threatening him to train yuta or else.

"miguel."

EXTRA:

"yuta, if anything happens to me, i need you to take care of the current first and second year students," satoru said, "i've got a bad feeling. i'm especially concerned about the first year, yuji itadori. just like you, he was up for a secret execution. if you could watch over him, i'd appreciate it."

"if anything happens? like you getting a girlfriend?" yuta asked, no jokes aside.

“oh, you're a comedian now, huh?” satoru retorted.

"well, i can't imagine anything else that would happen to you." yuta chirped as he walked side by side with his sensei.

"and for your information, i do have a girlfriend."

yuta asked curiously, "the sensei with the black hair and green eyes?"

"how did you know?" satoru asked. he never told his students about you. he liked to keep them guessing and let them find out on their own.

"just had a feeling." yuta said with a smile.

you were the one that had gotten yuta's paperwork ready when satoru suggested for him to train with miguel in africa. you were also the one who made sure he had somewhere to stay and that his finances were taken care of while he was away. miguel always preferred to talk to you instead of satoru in regards to anything that concerned yuta.

your job at tokyo jujutsu high was more than just administrational, you took care of every student, just like a mother.

yuta had a hunch that you were the woman that kept his childish sensei in check. there was something about the way gojo-sensei would mention your name in such an endearing manner, the way he looked at you when you would come into his classroom to give him paperwork while you flashed your signature cheeky smile at him, and of course, the way he was always quick to end a lesson or spar so that he could sneak away to your office to "speak with administration."

"i know what you're thinking, sensei." yuta said out loud, "i'll take care of (y/n)-sensei too."

satoru scoffed in surprise. he knew you would be able to take care of yourself, but he was grateful. grateful that his students loved you just as much as he did.

"thanks, yuta. i appreciate it."

DIVIDERS PROVIDED BY @/ANLIAN-AISHANG

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skzhua · 1 year

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fool ('your eyes' series)

♡ "I might be a fool too, then."

pairing: han jisung x reader.

genre: fluff, a bit of angst.

word count: 11,377

warnings: swearing, drinking, failed dates, suggestive. (not proofread yet!)

summary: being your closest friend on campus, jisung has been through thick and thin with you, and so the opposite. thus, he has seen your multiple attempts at dating, your numerous failed dates and the guys who had never called you back. what can be any better than a night in with him to cheer you up?

a/n: another one of my favourites of this series. we only have two more to go!

SERIES MASTERLIST

Jisung was done with school for the day, finally. Not that he didn't like his major, in contrary. He was one of the few to know what he wanted to do with his life and to actually like it. However, the comfort of his room seemed much more appealing for him, especially after a whole day of socializing with his friend, Chan. Again, it's not that he didn't like the man, but he was definitely an extrovert. To add it to the lot, he was being especially friendly with the new girl who had just transferred to the school. He endured tagging along for a while, until he couldn't anymore. So he left.

It was in times like this that he was glad to have gotten a dorm near the music department. It only took him under ten minutes to walk home and drop dead on his bed. Turning on his phone, he saw a notification coming from his favourite person, you.

He met you during your freshman year. For being an introvert, you were shockingly talkative when the teacher had paired you up with him for an assignment. For once, he was thankful for being forced to work in teams since it led to having one of the greatest people he met as a friend. It was undeniable that he took a liking for you quickly. He simply could not avoid falling for you. You were smart, pretty, funny, lazy (just like him), bubbly and very touchy. He thought of himself as someone who liked skin ship, but you were on another level. After being friends for less than a month, you had already started to cling onto him like a child and to give him hugs each time you met up.

Clicking on the message app, he read your texts with a grin on his face. Once again, you were complaining about work as per usual. You were colleagues with a girl named Chunhwa with whom you had grew a nice friendship as you had ended up sharing a dorm with her. One thing about her was how unproductive she would be at work. Sure, you were a lazy potato too, but you actually wanted to keep your job unlike her.

Jisung: I don't get how she didn't get fired yet.

Y/N: Me neither, honestly...

Y/N: Are you done with school? Can I come over?

Jisung: You don't have to ask! Get your ass here!

Jisung was messy. The first time you saw his room, you had to restrain yourself from picking up all his trash to throw it away. With time, you got used to it and gave up on trying to make him clean his mess. Needless to say you were taken aback when you saw he had cleaned up the place when you barged into his room.

"Damn, I'm impressed." you yelled out.

"Jeongin forced me."

"Not surprised." you shrugged and sat next to him on his bed. "So, I have kimchi and friend chicken." you pulled out each item from the plastic bag.

"You stopped to get food before coming here?"

"Obviously." you laughed. "And I did not forget your jjajamyeon this time." you took it out for him to snatch it from you immediately.

"You're the best." he hummed, hugging his food.

"I know." you snickered. "Now, get your laptop. It's my turn to choose the movie."

Jisung stared at you fondly as you wrapped yourself in his blanket and cutely scrolled through his Netflix account. It was moments like these that compensated with his aching heart of seeing you go out with so many undeserving people. Yes, for him, none of them deserved you because you were that precious. He even thought himself wasn't good enough for you, which is one of the reasons why he had not told you about his feelings.

You ended up choosing a random anime as you had already been searching for a good 30 minutes. Eyes focused on the screen, you opened your box full of chicken and munched on it, not caring of how unclean it looked. It was Jisung, anyway, not like you were trying to impress him. Plus, he had seen you in worse states. Three episodes in, you heard the front door open, and you knew immediately that Jisung's roomie, Jeongin, had just come back home. It was a few seconds later when you heard an agressive knocking. You got up to answer and there was Jeongin, fuming in fury.

"You're here again?" he huffed rudely.

Uneasy, you managed a shy smile as you answered. "Yeah, I brought kimchi with some jjajamyeon and fried chicken."

"Smells like shit." he muttered and searched for Jisung behind you. "Dude, we talked about this. We cleaned this morning!"

Intimidated, Jisung hurried to talk. "I swear I'll clean up the trash after."

With that, he went to close the door in his face, and dragged you with him back into the soft blankets. You let out a laugh you didn't know you were holding back, and he copied your expressions.

"You are making him go through so much, poor thing." you said after the laughter toned down.

"We're fine, I know he loves me." he snickered.

You shook your head in disapproval. "Keep telling yourself that, Ji."

Jisung was at Chan and Changbin's place as he stared impatiently at his phone. The others had gathered for their usual chillings, them being Sora, Minho and Chunhwa. As for you, you were on a date. The guy was from your English class, and had asked you out after you did a schoolwork together. Although your best friend never met him, he already knew he was going to be bad news.

And, somehow, he was right. Junsoo was, indeed, a total jerk. He asked some inappropriate questions about your relationship with Jisung as if he wanted to make sure you were available. Then, he didn't pay for the bill since he had just paid for his next semester, which you knew was a lie because all students have their school bill coming at the same time. He ended the night by touching every inch on your body after you had specifically told him to back off after the first time.

"Do you want to come back to my place?" he asked you when you got into his car, licking his bottom lips.

You stared at him in disgust. "Actually, I have plans after this. Just bring me back on campus."

He did insist, but stopped when you told him you were heading to Chan's dorm. Chan was a bit of a legend. He had contacts with everyone, and he was also buff as hell. Him being friends with Changbin also came handy in situations like these.

"I'd like to take you out again." Junsoo told you once you reached Chan's building.

You forced a smile, and nodded. "Sure. I'll see when I'm free."

You tried extra hard to not cringe when he kissed the back of your hand. As soon as his lips detached from your skin, you ran out of his car, and directly inside.

Jisung, who was still staring at his phone, finally got the call he had been waiting for all night. He did not hesitate one bit to answer, and asked how your date went, worried.

"Y/N?" he asked again when he didn't get a response.

"Ji..." you trailed off when a sob took over.

He got up from his seat in panic, and started to gather his things. "Y/N, baby, where are you? What did he do?"

"I'm downstairs. I was about to join you all, if you don't mind."

With that, Jisung calmed down and let go of his belongings. "Of course, we don't mind. Come right up and I'll make you some tea. Does it sound okay for you?"

"Yeah. Thank you, Ji."

"Come up quickly."

Changbin raised an eyebrow at the younger man. That's when Jisung realized everyone had stopped what they were doing to observe the scene. Unfortunately, this was not the first time something like this happened. In fact, it occured about a week prior from that moment.

"You can go in my room, if you want." Chan offered. "I'll sleep at Minho's instead."

"When did I agree with this?" Minho huffed, but apologized when Chan sent a glare his way.

"Thank you. Can I use your boiler to make her some tea?"

The man gestured to the whole kitchen, as if to tell him to make himself at home. He prepared everything in a hurry, and jumped when he heard a knock at the door. He quickly let you in and engulfed you into a hug. Your quiet sobs were breaking his heart, and he really wondered what the man had done to you for putting you in such a state.

"Your tea's ready." he said softly. "Do you want to stay with us, or do you want to talk in Chan's room?"

You shrugged your shoulders before wiping your tears. Your puffy eyes were enough for Jisung to know you'd rather not be seen crying your life out by everyone. He got your cup of tea and carefully walked with you to Chan's room. He leaned on the desk as he put down your beverage and let you inside. When you sat down on the bed, he hesitated whether he should speak or not. Your small sniffles were still the only thing that could be heard, and they were becoming louder and louder.

After a while, you finally talked when your crying reduced. "Am I some kind of magnet to assholes?"

Jisung knew he shouldn't be laughing, but he couldn't help but let out a muffled chuckle. Thankfully, you didn't take it personally and smiled with him.

"You're far from being a jerk magnet. Your best example would that you have me and the boys around." he said more seriously.

"It's not the same..." you mumbled.

Jisung sighed, knowing well you meant he was only going to remain your friend. "Are you going to tell me what he did to you, now?"

"It doesn't matter."

"It does to me."

You knew he was going to insist until you spill it out. You loved how you could count on him anytime, but it also made you worry that you put too many of your problems onto him. Anyway, you were not going to get away easily from his interrogation.

"He..." you started, but a knot formed in your stomach. "Let's say he stepped over some boundaries."

You could see him fume already. He straightened his posture and walked closer to you, encouraging you to develop furthermore.

"What boundaries?" he asked when you were not answering, and you were still not. "Did he touch you?"

Slowly, you nodded your head. You couldn't prevent him from exploding in anger, and it was not an enjoyable sight. As much as he can be the softest cinnamon roll, Jisung was impulsive when something that wasn't right would happen.

"Ji, it's okay-"

"For fuck's sake, Y/N." he yelled out, interrupting you. "Do you really think it's okay for someone to touch you without your consent?"

"We touch each other all the time-"

He cut you off once again. "It's not the same. You initiate skinship, and I never touched you in an inappropriate way. Plus, we talked about it, and you told me you were fine with it."

"I said I was fine with it with him, too."

He scoffed. "Were you thinking it, or were you being nice because you felt bad if you said no?" You didn't answer to this one because he knew you too well, and he had hit at the right spot. "Fuck, you're so dense. When are you going to realize you can set your limits?"

"Are you saying this is my fault?"

You didn't really think when saying that. Part of it was your fault, and you knew that very well since it wasn't the first time you let a guy touch you when you didn't want to. But a bigger part of it was the guy's fault. You knew Jisung meant well by saying you shouldn't let them do something you don't want to, because that was the truth. Anyhow, your mouth spoke before your brain could process your thoughts. And now Jisung had stepped away from you, and dropped himself on Chan's desk chair.

"You know damn fucking well I will never say this is your fault. I'm just trying to tell you to not let yourself be so... accommodating."

You rolled your eyes. "I don't need you to act like my dad, or something."

"I'm saying this as a friend." he looked at you with a serious face. "I don't want you to end up in a bad situation where I can't do anything about it."

"Well, maybe don't do something? You don't decide for me, Jisung."

He chuckled in disbelief. "You came here so I could help you, right?"

"And you're doing a great job at it."

"Do you expect me to not get mad when I learn an asshole was trying to fuck my best friend without her consent?"

"I would expect you to be more gentle with the situation, yes."

This seemed to do the trick for Jisung to switch back to his usual state. He took a big sigh as he looked down, and joined you on the bed. You could already see he was much calmer, so you brought him into a hug.

"I just want you to comfort me, that's all."

He sighed even louder as he hugged you back. "I'm sorry. I just hate seeing you suffer like this."

"Just hold me, and I'll feel better."

He complied as he hugged you even tighter. "How about we do like last time when that jerk called you an annoying piece of shit?"

You grunted and pushed him away from you. "Don't remind me."

"Hey, I'm only suggesting to do something to get your mind off of him."

You shook your head. "I'm already tired as it is, let's just go to sleep?"

He nodded. "I'll be your pillow again."

"Thank you, Ji."

"You two fucked?" Chunhwa said in disgust. "I'm glad I left earlier."

You groaned in frustration, as you were attempting to explain what happened a few days ago. "No, we slept together. We always do."

"Putting the emphasis on the 'sleep together' part does not help." You deadpanned at her, but she only shrugged her shoulders. "Girl, you're not being clear."

"Is it that hard to get? I cried, he held me, and we fell asleep in the same bed."

"There you go, that's much better." she snickered at you, but your expression remained the same. "You'll have to thank Chan for letting you take over his room. Again. And, please, do not argue like this again? We literally heard everything."

"Yeah, yeah." you rolled your eyes at her. "Sorry about that, I guess. It's just that... Jisung can be so reactive sometimes."

"He cares about you." the girl put her hand on your shoulder. "And just so you know, he hates seeing you cry about a man every two weeks."

You slapped her hand away in a playful manner as you stood up from your bed. "He'll hate it if he wants to. I have join him now, anyways. Catch up with you later?"

"Sure."

You ran outside to go at the local café. Ordering an iced coffee, you sat at a table to wait patiently for Jisung to show up. Knowing him, he was most likely going to be late. You didn't mind, though. You had some personal schoolwork to do in the meantime, it wouldn't hurt to get some of it done.

"Hey." A voice startled you.

You looked up and saw a guy. You swore you had seen him before, but you weren't sure from where. Noticing your confusion, the man chuckled shyly before extending his hand out for you to shake.

"I'm Minyoung, a friend of Junsoo."

You shook his hand in a reluctant manner. "Y/N."

"I know." he laughed out. "I saw you and I just wanted to apologize for my friend's behaviour towards you. He has a bad habit of not being able to keep it in his pants."

Your mouth formed an 'o' shape as you started to get why he started talking to you. "It's all good, no worries."

"Okay, good." he chuckled.

He stood there, uneasy, and seemed to hesitate to speak. The moment he was about to say something, you spotted Jisung behind him. He was a mess. Hair disheveled, glasses on meaning he didn't have the time to put his contact lenses on, bag dragging behind him... You laughed at the sight of him, causing the man in front of you to turn around, laying eyes on your best friend of a mess.

"I'm so sorry, I know I'm late. I slept in and I should have texted you, but then forgot, and my bus was about to leave so I ran and-" he breathed out heavily, chest puffing.

"It's okay, Ji." you laughed. "It actually allowed me to get some stuff done in the meantime."

He nodded his head, reassured. But then, his eyes stopped on the man next to him. Eyeing up and down, he frowned.

"Am I interrupting something, or..?" he trailed off.

"Oh gosh, of course not-" you spoke.

"Actually, kind of-"

You and Minyoung exchanged gazes, laughing awkwardly in the process. "Can you give us a second, Ji?"

Your friend sighed and left to go to the counter to order himself something. He knew where this was going and he did not like one bit of it. While he didn't know Minyoung that much, he knew enough to be certain he was bad news. Captain of their basketball team, handsome as hell, and grades that only a genuis could get, he was a jackpot for any girl on campus. Jisung watched the two of you from afar, unsure if he should be coming back to avoid yet, another failed date.

"Hey, Jisung!" Seungmin said from the other side of the counter, breaking him off his thoughts.

"Seungmin." he gave him a nod before his gaze went back on you.

He tried to hear a bit of your conversation and magically caught on what you were saying.

"Did you want to tell me somehing?" you asked the guy.

"Actually, I'm not sure if this is appropriate, but I'd like to take you on a date? I know you don't know me much, but I can assure you I'm nothing like Junsoo."

Did you believe him? No, of course not. However, one thing about you is that you always gave someone a chance even if they came off as bad people. Another thing was that you always tried to see the positive aspects of anyone, because you truly believed everyone was good.

"Alright, sure." you smiled.

"Oh, wow, great." he grinned. "Are you free tonight? No, wait, next Tuesday evening?"

You did have plans with Jisung, but he would understand if you cancelled, right? Plus, you saw him pretty much everyday. What could one day without seeing him do?

"Yeah, I'm available."

"Great. How about we meet here at 5pm?" You nodded happily, which caused him to smile even more. "I'll see you next week, then."

"See you."

By then, Jisung had come back and watched the man leave the café, daggers in his eyes. "I got you a latte." he said in an unpleasant tone.

You took it from him as a frown formed on you face. "Thanks... Are you okay?"

"You agreed to go out with him?" he scoffed while sitting down in front of you.

"Ji-"

"Y/N, we talked about this recently. Was he being insistant? Do I need to file a restraining order for you?"

You rolled your eyes at him as you let out a snort. "It's fine, trust me. He seems more decent than Junsoo."

"We'll see about that." he huffed. "Now, where are we with the project?"

You opened the Word file on your laptop and turned the screen to show it to him. "I did most of the layout and I took some of the ideas from your document, if you don't mind."

"It's a team project, of course I don't mind." he deadpanned at you. "You marked me to write the conclusion? You know I suck at that!"

"You would have complained if I put you the introduction too, so it doesn't matter."

You truly loved Jisung with all of your heart, but as a school partner? He was the absolute worst.

Things with Minyoung were simple. At school, he started to walk you to your class and buy you a snack once in a while. He would ask if you ate breakfast and just come to entertain you when he would spot you reading alone. Most of the time, it was only him and you but it did happen that Jisung had to third-wheel.

"Hey, pretty." Minyoung said as he incrusted himself between you and your best friend.

Jisung huffed as he watched you bat your eyelashes at the man who has just interrupted your conversation. Not only that, but he had the guts of sitting as to separate him from you.

"Hey." you smiled admirably. "How was your class?"

"Good, but I had something else in mind." he nudged at you. "I've got everything covered for tonight."

"That's nice. I can't wait."

"I'm sure you'll love it. I'll see you tonight." he said while sending a wink your way.

He got up, still staring at you, while you waved at him. Jisung sat right back closer to you even if the bench had plenty of space.

"What is happening tonight?" he asked which broke you off from your trance.

"Oh." you blinked a couple of times. "I forgot to tell you, but my date with him is tonight."

He frowned. "I thought you already went out, hence the weird flirting since last week."

You shook your head. "It's tonight."

"But, Y/N." he whined. "The next episode is out tonight and then we go to the guys' dorm and play games, remember?"

"I know that and I'm so sorry. I'll make it up to you, I promise." you rubbed his shoulder.

"We had planned this already, did you just say yes because he came up to you all cute and shit?" he asked but your face was enough to answer his question. "You're unbelievable." he shook his head and got up.

"Ji." you called him out.

"You know where I am if he breaks your heart." he sighed and walked away.

You did feel bad, but like you had thought previously, you saw Jisung ever single day. It was with a weird feeling that you left the school grounds to go back to your dorm. As you stepped inside, you almost rushed into Chunhwa who was about to leave.

"Watch out." you yelled out and she stepped aside just in time.

"You're in a hurry." she laughed. "Is tonight your date?"

You nodded happily as you found balance on you feet again. "Minyoung told me to meet at the coffee shop but I don't know what he planned out for us tonight."

"Have a good night then, but don't be stupid and use protection!" she waved as she walked out.

"This applies to you with Changbin." you shouted to her as the door was closing leaving just enough time for her to send you the middle finger.

You laughed at yourself and then proceeded to go to your closet. You didn't have much that you could work with since most of your decent outfits were in the laundry. Your eyes scanned through your selection of pants and you opted to go for a cozy look. Picking a pair of large ripped jeans and a shirt with a low-cut, you changed quickly before changing your hairstyle into something more fancy. Adding some jewelry to the whole look, you looked at yourself through the mirror with a satisfied smile.

Your phone ringing interrupted your moment and you answered without looking at who was contacting you. "Hello?"

"You're sure you're not coming tonight?"

Of course he was going to try and convince you. "Ji, I'm not going to change my mind."

"The episode is out now! You expect me to wait an entire day for you to be available to watch it?"

You huffed. "Watch it by yourself then."

"It's our show." he insisted. "Plus, Chan cleared his schedule to hang out for us. The least you can do is actually show up, no?"

He did have a point. In fact, you missed hanging out with the gang. And since he brought up Chan who you had barely seen in the past months, you were on the verge of calling off your date and go with your friends. But your phone buzzed which indicated another call was coming in.

"Can I hold you for a second? I have someone calling me." You heard an annoyed "yes" from his end before accepting the other call. "Yes?"

"Hi, Y/N! I'm letting you know I'm here already so I'll be waiting."

You checked the time and cursed at yourself. You had taken too long to prepare yourself that you didn't notice the time passing by so fast.

"Right, I had a few things to do at home so I'll be late by a few minutes."

"It's all good." Minyoung reassured. "Do you want me to order something?"

"Not yet. I'm coming as soon as I can."

"See you, pretty."

You blushed and hung up. Hearing the familiar music of Mario Bros, you remembered Jisung was also waiting after you.

"Ji?"

"Yeah, I'm here."

"Listen..." you started, the guilt building up.

Of course, Jisung knew that tone. The number of times he listened to you apologizing for cancelling plans with him to go out on dates made him familiar with this sad voice of yours. He knew what you were about to say.

"It's alright. Like I said, you know where to find me if anything."

"I'm sorry."

Without adding another word, he hung up. While the weird knot in your stomach was still present, you shrugged it off quickly and left your place to head to the café.

Arriving to your destination, it didn't take you too long to spot your date sitting at a table as he scrolled through his phone. He looked very good as he had changed into a clean white shirt with a jean jacket to go over it. His hair was styled differently than usual. Instead of the messy state it was usually in, he parted it on the side and put some gel for it to stay in place.

"I hope I didn't make you wait for too long." you said as you came into his view.

"Y/N! Of course not, it was barely ten minutes." he chuckled before eyeing you up and down. "You look beautiful."

"Thank you. You look great too."

He rubbed the side of his neck in shyness. "I tried to dress up, yeah. So, I hope you like bowling because that's our plan for tonight."

"Sounds good. Lead the way, Mister."

He smiled widely before putting his hand on your lower back to guide you towards the exit. Felix, who had taken the evening shift at the coffee shop, watched in silence from afar.

Of course, it was not in Jisung's plans to keep track on what you were doing. Still, he couldn't help but wonder if you were okay. Not feeling in the mood of socializing if you weren't going to be there, he had texted Changbin in advance to tell him he won't make it to their game night. And that's how he found himself in front of his laptop with a soda on the side, watching your favourite show alone.

Until Felix texted him. He wasn't close friends with the guy. They had only met the year before at one of Chan's parties and bonded over the fact their birthdays were only a day apart from each other. They still kept contact afterwards, texting each other every once in a while.

Felix: She's out with another guy? I thought I saw her with Junsoo last week.

Jisung: You're talking about Y/N? Yeah, she blindly agreed to go out with him.

Felix: When are you going to stop doing this to yourself?

Jisung: Doing what?

Felix: Don't act like you don't know.

Jisung sighed. What was he going to do anyway? You made it very clear that you could not see him in a romantic way and he had buried the idea of asking you out the moment he got the message. Plus, he was nothing like the guys you went out with. Jisung was weak and barely did any kind of exercice. He wasn't that popular or anything and his life consisted mainly of staying at home to watch anime.

Jisung: I want her to be happy. If dating a popular basketball player is what it takes, then so be it.

Felix: But in the meantime you're hurting.

Jisung: Because you're dating the prettiest girl on campus doesn't mean you need to meddle in my love life.

Felix: I'm not dating Hyunjoo.

Jisung: Right, and I don't like Y/N.

Felix: Aha! Admitted.

Jisung: I like her, yes, but it won't change a thing.

Felix: Alright man. Just saying, the guy seems to be into her a lot. Don't miss your chance.

Jisung: It's fine. I'm happy for her.

Lying to himself was a better option than facing his own pain. Whether he wanted to or not, seeing you with someone else hurt like hell. But for your sake and his, he never said anything, and he was determined for it to stay this way.

As for you, the date was going smoothly. This might had been the only guy who was treating you with respect. He bought you snacks while you were playing and encouraged you with sweet words when you'd miss a shot.

By the end of the game, he invited you to go to a park to walk and get to know one another. On the side of the trail, he picked up a flower and placed it on your hair. Gestures like these were the absolute perfection in normal situations. But for you? It did nothing. You did get shy and fluttered a little bit, but it wasn't like genuine feelings blooming. You decided to not mind it for now. Since you were still feeling bad for ditching your best friend, you assumed it might be the cause of your mixed feelings.

"I always wondered what's the thing you have Han." Minyoung blurted out of the blue.

"What about him?"

"You know what people say around campus."

In confusion, you shook your head. "Other students talk about us?"

"Yeah, I thought you knew." Your face still having the same expression, he sighed before speaking. "You're always together and because you two are pretty good looking, people assume you are together. I have some girls from the cheerleading team that are actually quite jealous of you."

You scoffed. "Jealous of me?"

He nodded. "Jisung is quite a catch, you know?"

"He's the most antisocial person on Earth." you argued in disbelief.

"It doesn't change the fact girls think he's hot. I'm only telling you what my friends said about it."

You sat on a bench near by as this conversation was getting a little bit overwhelming for you. You did know Jisung was handsome. Heck, you saw that face every day, you weren't blind. The surprising point was how much he was a heartthrob unlike what you thought. With how he had always put it out, he was the biggest loser ever.

"And people say we're... a thing?"

"Almost everyone, yeah. But you've gone out with a couple of my friends, so I suppose those rumors are false." he affirmed and sat next to you.

You chuckled. "Very far from the truth, yes. Jisung and I are nothing more than friends."

"So I can do this without worrying of getting my ass kicked?"

"Do what?"

Before you knew it, his lips were on yours. They tasted a little bit like strawberry, probably due to the beverage he drank beforehand. Strangely, it reminded of of the time you had attempted to make a strawberry cake with Jisung, which ended in a failure obviously.

"I think we should go back, I'm starting to get tired." you said as soon as the kiss ended.

"Oh, okay. Do you want me to walk you home?"

"It'd be nice, yes."

He walked you to your dorm safely and kissed you once more as a farewell. Luckily for you, it looked like Chunhwa was still out at Changbin's place. You took the opportunity to use your shared television to put on your show. Jisung had probably watched it on his own, so you didn't feel bad doing it alone. It still felt wrong, though. You never missed an episode together.

Little did you know that at the same moment, your best friend was already at the end of the episode, having the worst time of his life as he felt guilty for not having waited for you.

You couldn't believe that finals were already coming up. Although you hated the amount of stress it added to your already high level, you were glad to see the end of the tunnel. It was even better because Minyoung had finally asked you to be his girlfriend after the multiple dates you went on.

"You said no?" Jisung almost screamed which caused you to shush him.

You gave an apologetic smile to the librarian before glaring at your friend. "I said I'll think about it."

He groaned. "I thought you liked him and if you want my opinion, he's the first decent contestant we've had so far."

"You act as if dating me is a competition or something."

He deadpanned at you. "With the amount of people who asked you out throughout the time we've known each other, yes it is."

This made you remember your conversation you had with Minyoung on your first date. You had been dying to ask Jisung if what you heard was true, if he really was as popular among the female students as Minyoung claimed him to be. You just never had the opportunity to bring up the topic, but this was your chance.

"I could say the same about you."

He raised an eyebrow at you. "Have you seen me go out with someone?"

"No, but apparently your good looks are attracting people."

He smirked. "Finally admitting that I'm the most handsome student at school?" he joked.

"I'm only repeating what Minyoung told me about you."

His smile fell. "What did he say about me? Y/N, you swore you'd only date someone who is okay with us being so close."

"He's fine with it, don't worry. No, he said girls from the cheerleading team are crushing on you."

You didn't expect for him to react much other than tell you it was all false but as he focused back to writing down in his notebook, you started to doubt. He might not have told you everything about him after all.

"Han Jisung." you said in a warning tone but the only response you got was a hum. "It's true?"

He finally dared to look up at you. "No? Maybe? Fine, yes. They're pretty insistent, you know? One of them told me that the fact I get shy when they ask me out only makes me more attractive. Have you seen me, Y/N? I'm a low-life dude who eats ramen 24/7 and whose best friend is one of the prettiest girls in college who is, by the way, very out of my league. But really, when you think of-"

"Woah, stop here." you said as you raised your hand up. "What do you mean I'm one of the prettiest girls here? So everything Minyoung told me was true?"

He rolled his eyes as he was, by then, annoyed by how clueless you were. "Why do you think you get dates only by snapping your fingers? Why do you think I always want to avoid the sport center?"

"Because you hate sports?"

"Fair point, but it's really only because I'm avoiding the cheerleaders."

You were in shock. All of this time, you thought he was just bad with asking girls out which would have explained his lack of activity in this department, but in fact, he was the one turning them down.

"None of them interest you?"

He scoffed. "I don't have time for that. Besides, I'm most likely going to embarrass myself if I actually go on a date. Now that we have covered this very useless part of my life, can we focus on the project? The due date is in two days might I remind you."

"Right, sorry."

Some time passed until the two of you got tired of it. You packed your books in your bags and headed out of the library. Jisung left first and told you he'd wait for you at his dorm with food to watch your show.

"I'll go find Minyoung if you don't mind."

He sent you a knowing look. "Should I get a bottle of champagne to celebrate?"

"Go." you pushed him towards the exit as he laughed loudly.

After having gathered everything from your locker, you went to make your way to the sport center. You remembered Minyoung told you he had a practice if you wanted to tell him your answer then. When you entered the gym, you found it empty. Logically, practice was done so you went to go next to the changing rooms to wait for him to get out.

"I thought she liked you enough to say yes."

You recognized Junsoo's voice speaking. You didn't feel anything but disgust by hearing his voice so you were about to leave. But another voice caught your attention.

"I didn't lose the bet yet, she might say yes." Your heart sank as you heard Minyoung talk. "But this Han guy is really getting in the way."

"I told you so!" Junsoo replied. "She's impossible to get because Han keeps us away. Have you had the talk?"

"What talk?"

"He came to me after our date and he might be small but he's scary and strong as hell."

"What did he say?"

"It was mostly insults and shit like I don't deserve her anyway or something. If anything, it's kind of sad how he's being such a simp for her."

When you thought you've heard enough, the door suddenly opened wide with Minyoung coming out first. The instant his eyes laid on you, you could see the regret in them.

"Y/N."

You were glad you didn't let tears flood out because you surely felt them coming. You could not face him in such a vulnerable state, not after what he had said about you.

"Are you in high school or something to be betting on someone as if they're objects to collect?"

He shook his head. "This is not what it looks like."

He tried to approach you but you backed away. "I'm glad I came here to tell you I don't want to be with you. I guess you just added more reason for me to tell you to fuck off."

You turned on your heels and started to walk away. Your eyes were starting to get filled with tears, but you wanted to say one more thing before letting them out.

"By the way," you said as you stopped on your tracks. "Jisung was right to go after you all because you are fucking desperate to be betting on a girl."

Jisung, on the other hand, was happily preparing the room for your night in. He had asked for Jeongin to go out but he already had a night shift at the convenience store which allowed him to have to dorm to himself. When he heard a knock on his door, he opened it with a wide smile. However, it was soon wiped off his face when he recognized the familiar tears coming down on your cheeks.

"Y/N, baby, what happened?" he asked and brought you into his embrace. "What did that son of a bitch do?"

It was only then that you let yourself sob out without holding back. "I hate men." you simply said.

Jisung seemed to have gotten the messages that you didn't want to talk about it and he led you to his room. You were in awe as you caught sight of the setup for watching movies with a tray set on the desk filled with your favourite treats.

"You're the best, oh gosh." you exclaimed, melting at how affectionate the gesture was.

"It was originally to congratulate you for your new relationship, but it can totally be to cheer you up."

"I love it." you smiled and hugged him.

"We can move to the living room if you want. Jeongin's working."

You nodded in approval of his suggestion and you helped him carry the blankets and pillows to his couch while he transported the tray of food. Quickly, you settled with playing Mario Kart as you would always do. He would never tell you but he did let you win a few times only to see a happy grin on your face. He was competitive but never with you.

"Stop looking at me and focus." he whined with his mouth full of popcorn. "You've been falling at the same spot three times already."

"Watch your screen, not mine." you nagged and only received mocking from him.

Your kart was approaching the end but Jisung sent a red shell your way which knocked your vehicle down for a second. Victoriously, he surpassed you and was now leading the course. As a way to distract him, you came closer to his face.

"Jisung~" you cooed. "You suck at this game."

He groaned as he tried to push you away. "Y/N, stop this."

Luckily, it did distract him enough as he went off road for an instant which allowed you to take the lead and reach the end. You jumped up in victory and danced a little as to show off your skills.

"I'm so good, shame on you for not being able to beat me."

He rolled his eyes. "Enough gaming for you tonight." he concluded and took the controller from your grip.

"But Jisung!" you whined.

"You won all of the five games we played, time for a movie now." He changed the cables to connect it to his Netflix account. "Stop pouting, I'm letting you choose."

You immediately glowed up at the mention of you choosing. "For real?"

"It's your get-better-night, so yeah." he shrugged. "But please consider that I hate your children movies."

"The Minions is peak cinematography and I will stand by it until I die."

Only to piss him off, you pick that exact movie. He grumbled some curses at you before he let you snuggle into him, not forgetting to bring the bowl of popcorn with him for the two of you. He hoped to heavens that you would be too immersed into the movie to not hear his heart beat so hard. It was during moments like these that Jisung wished he was yours so he could kiss you as if it was a normal occurrence between you two.

"Jisung." you huffed as you received a couple of popcorns on your face that dropped from the handful that he took.

"What?" he said and noticed what you were referring to. "Sorry." he laughed.

You didn't hesitate to take a handful yourself and throw it his way.

"Oh, it's on." he declared.

So for the next thirty minutes or so, the only things that could be heard in the living room were your laughs, insults you threw at each other, and the movie that was still playing in the background. It ended when realization hit Jisung upon seeing the floor in a messy state.

"Fuck, Jeongin is going to kill me."

You laughed at him. "He'll understand."

"Do you know Jeongin?"

You could only laugh more and then dropped on the couch, Jisung copying you soon after. "Thank you for tonight. It helped a lot."

"It's nothing. I told you I'm always here for you." he smiled. "Do you want to talk about what happened?"

"I was a bet." you kept it short. "I overheard him talking about me with his teammates."

He winced. "I'm so sorry. It's unfortunate, I had good vibes about him."

"Yeah, well, some people are not like what they seem... like you."

He frowned. "What do you mean?"

"Nothing, I'm still thinking about how popular you are." you said, not wanting to talk about him defending you yet.

"Let's not talk about that." he groaned. "We can do something else, the movie's over." he pointed to the credits rolling on the screen.

"How about games?"

You went over almost every silly games you knew such as charades, truth or dare, mimes and more. Approaching the end of the night, you went on with playing rock paper scissors as you ran out of ideas.

"Ouch." Jisung exclaimed after you flunked his forehead.

"It wasn't that bad!" you rolled your eyes. "Again."

You showed your fist, but Jisung had his palm opened. He beat your rock with his paper.

"No." you complained.

"Come here, baby." he snickered.

You leaned closer to him and got the hair on your forehead out of the way. He then flicked his finger, strongly enough for you to hear a toc. You gasped in pain and your eyes squinted while you put your hand over where his finger had just hit.

"Oh fuck, I'm so sorry." he hurried to apologize. "Are you okay?"

He held your face with the palm of his hands. Suddenly, it felt like time stopped. Staring back at his almond eyes, you could not move. He was the cutest as worry was sprawled all over his face.

"I'm sorry." he said and then did something you certainly did not expect.

Bringing your head lower, he placed a kiss on the red spot on your forehead and then pat on it. You could only stare at him still, not finding the words to react.

"There, all healed." he smiled.

When he met your gaze again, it dawned on him that he just kissed your head without asking. His mind went blank as he didn't know what to say to justify himself. But the smile on your own face was all it took for him to relax. His eyes flickered down on your lips before he came closer. He was still approaching dangerously until he kissed you. You didn't even question it and melted into it, almost as if it was natural. Well, it felt like it. Your mouths were moving perfectly in sync with each other and you couldn't get enough of him.

But he abruptly separated himself from you. "I-I shouldn't- I didn't mean-" he stammered, clearly unsure of what to say. "I'm sorry."

"Ji..." you said, reaching out your hand to him.

He pushed it away and got up. "I think we should call it a night."

"I think we should talk."

"Y/N, please."

His pleading face hurt you. With a small nod, you took your stuff that was scattered around the living room and went to his front door in silence. You didn't turn the knob just yet.

"Thank you for tonight, I'm being honest."

He looked away, unable to keep his eyes on you any longer. "It's nothing. Good night."

"Good night."

As his door closed shut, he let himself fall on the couch. Why did he have to be so careless and kiss you just like that?

You were patient and understanding, so of course it made sense that Jisung didn't reach out to you yet to talk about what had happened. Nonetheless, you had your limits and more than a week without talking to your best friend, your other half, it was too much. You were grateful for the finals to have distracted you a little but now that you were done, he was the only thing in your mind. Maybe the party Chan was organizing for the end of the semester was going to help.

After your last exam, Chunhwa invited you to hang out with her and Changbin. You wanted to refuse at first to avoid watching them eye-fucking each other. However, it had been a while since you spent time with them so you ended up coming to the coffee shop with them. You took the opportunity to give her a little update as to what happened with Minyoung and Jisung. She didn't seem much surprised but still listened nonetheless.

"And hear this: he didn't even text me afterwards. Can you believe it?" you finished explaining the situation.

You followed her gaze and noticed she was staring at Changbin. Without her seeing, you rolled your eyes at how smitten she was.

"He'll do it eventually, don't worry."

Her response did not help. You only huffed when Changbin came back from the counter with the muffin you asked him to order. In one go, you got it in your mouth and munched aggressively.

"I would have never guess that Jisung was the one who put you in this state." Chunhwa said, taken aback from the quantity of food you managed to put in your mouth.

Still munching your muffin, you shrugged. "Not my fault he ghosted me after he kissed me. You should talk with someone when something like this happens instead of ignoring the issue. For real, it's like you fucked a close friend and then never establish what happens next. And sex is a big deal as much as kissing is."

Not really thinking while talking, you then realized you might have referred to what was going on between your two friends unintentionally. Chunhwa ignored it though as she rubbed your back to reassure you.

"He's such a fool, I swear to God I'll smack him next time I see him." you mumbled under your breath.

"He might come to the party tonight. Take it as your chance to talk to him."

You shook your head. "Forget about him. I'll just have fun tonight."

And Jisung wasn't doing any better than you. In fact, he was enraged with himself for not talking to you. He thought it was too late by then and didn't dare to make the first move. Plus, the only time he got to get a glimpse of you, you had glared intensely at him from the other side of the cafeteria. Needless to say that he didn't feel so good. He tried to hide it since he had one final exam to take.

He came across Eunhee, Chan's potential lover, and he greeted her with a weak smile as they went to do the exam together. It went by quickly and before he knew it, he was done. The two of them walked out together and chatted about the questions to see if their answers were similar.

"I was certain it was d..." he said, confused on his answer.

"By the way," Eunhee spoke, grabbing his attention. "I wanted to make sure you were doing okay. You don't look so good to me, no offense."

He looked down on the ground and hesitated to talk for an instant. "Yeah, I'm alright. Just... Y/N and I fought and there is Chan's party tonight. I know she's going but I'm not sure if I want to face her." he admitted as he remembered the death glare you gave him.

"You should go."

"You think so?"

She smiled. "Yeah, I do. You two are practically inseparable from what I see. I think it'll be a shame to not try to fix things."

"You have a point..." he breathed out. "Alright, I'll go. Are you coming too?"

She thought for a moment before nodding. "I guess I can stop by."

For some reason, her words really motivated him. As soon as he got home, he took the time to choose something appropriate to wear. He took all of his clothes out of his drawer and started to discard certain pieces of clothing. From an outer perspective, it looked very disorganized but for Jisung, it was clear.

"What the hell?" Jeongin exclaimed in horror as he stopped in front of Jisung's room. "What is happening here? It looks like a crime scene."

He rolled his eyes. "I'm simply trying to find something to wear for tonight."

"Oh, you're coming in the end? That's good, we'll leave together then?"

"Sure." Jisung shrugged. "Do you know who else is going?"

"Pretty much everyone except for Eunhee. I tried to convince her but she didn't want to."

"Bizarre, she told me she'll come."

Jeongin frowned. "Bizarre, indeed. Anyway, I'll be waiting for you so hurry up."

As requested, Jisung got ready in no time. He had picked a normal t-shirt and put a plaid vest over it with a pair of black jeans. He finalized the look with chains and rings and made sure to arrange his hair in a decent way, unlike the mop he had for the past days.

Before joining Jeongin, Jisung thought it'd be a good idea to send you a quick message to at least let you know he was willing to talk. He didn't expect you to answer, but he was still hopeful.

The two roommates left their flat and arrived about ten minutes before the given time. Chan invited them in by offering them a drink and they went over to the couch where Sora and Youngmi were already sitting. They started to chat about the end of school and other plans they had for the summer. Looking down at his phone every once in a while to see if you answered, he was happy to see Eunhee finally arriving.

"Am I late?" she asked him after they exchanging a quick side hug.

"We pretty much all came in advance. Minho, Hyunjin, Byeol, Hyunjoo and Felix are missing." he informed before drinking what Chan gave him.

"And Chunhwa and Y/N." Changbin added discreetly, nudging his friend's arm. "She told us about what happened."

Jisung's face grew red. "I prefer to not talk about it for now."

"I'll just let you know that she is mad, but like, mad."

This was no good news. And he was right to think so. As more people kept coming, his anxiety only had risen. Mixing a huge party with you being mad at him, he was not doing well.

But on your side, you didn't see that. When you arrived with Chunhwa, the first thing you did was chugging shots after shots before joining other students on the dance floor. Swaying your body to the rhythm, you were more than happy to not be thinking about anything else but that. You eventually lost Chunhwa when you realized she left with Changbin. Instead of trying to look for someone you knew, a guy started to grind on you. Usually, you would be disgusted and would push him away. However, because of the level of alcohol in your body, you couldn't care less. Moving your body with him, you felt his pelvic area become harder. Maybe you were starting to feel uneasy. Nonetheless, you kept on going and he ended up kissing you ferociously.

And Jisung was watching all of it from the corner of the room, his jaw clenching at the simple sight of someone other than him kissing you. By then, he was at his fourth drink of the night. Having grabbed a random beer that tasted like piss, his only goal was to drink his feelings away although he knew it was a bad way to cope.

"Are you alright?"

The voice took him by surprise but once he realized it was Chunhwa, he calmed down a little bit.

"I literally came here to tell her about, well, I assume you know?" he started to rant and she nodded in understanding. "I don't get her."

Taking another sip of the nasty beer, he made a weird face because of the taste.

"Hwayoung truly loves you. Honestly, I think she's scared of things changing between you two. And tonight means nothing to her, I can tell you that." Chunhwa attempted to defend you, but Jisung was having none of it and scoffed.

"I guess I understand, but I can't always be that guy. The one who's around whenever she needs it."

"I get that."

He realized it was the first time he admitted out loud how much he hated being your emotional support every time you got ditched. Just then, Changbin arrived after he had calmed the party down a little due to Chan's argument with Sora. He joined Chunhwa to her side and kissed her on the lips quickly, making Jisung scoff even louder.

"Alright, lovebirds. Rub it in my face." he rolled his eyes.

Changbin chuckled. "We've only just confessed."

"Yeah, well, at least your girl isn't being a total idiot..."

He took it as his cue to leave the couple alone. Spotting Sora leaving Chan, he thought that maybe he should be a good friend and go to him to see if he was doing alright after the fight. However, he didn't make it as someone tripped on his foot and fell into his arms. He clumsily tried to get a good grip to prevent the girl from falling.

"Hi, Ji~"

He cursed under his breath. Of all the students present, it had to be you. By looking at your flushed face, it was a sign that you might have consumed too much. He helped you up on your feet and went to Chan. As the older man saw the state you were in, he immediately helped Jisung to bring you to his room.

"Do you want me to stay with you two?"

Jisung shook his head. "I've got her from here, thanks."

As Chan left the room, you tried to get to the bed alone, but it was no success. Jisung sighed and held your sides to guide you. As you slumped on the bed, you started to hit his chest. He wasn't necessarily taken aback from your behaviour as he did ignore your messages for a while so he simply accepted his fate and let himself get beaten up by you. Well, not beaten up. More like attacked poorly because your hits were so weak.

"You're so pretty." you smiled sheepishly after you were done with hitting him. "Why do you have to be so pretty? I can't stay pissed at you if you look this good."

He chuckled. "Then don't be mad at me?"

"I can't, I hate you."

"Hmm, is that so?"

You looked at him attentively. Grabbing his head, he let out a whimper from how strong your grip was. You brought him closer and pursed your lips. He panicked for a moment as he didn't want to kiss you while you were this drunk.

"Y/N."

"I don't hate you." you whined. "I love you."

Okay, now, he was definitely not doing okay. He pushed your hands away and took a step back.

"I'll go get you a glass of water."

"Jisungie~" you called him out. "Stay with me, please."

He couldn't resist you plea, so he stayed. He took the spot next to you and allowed you to cuddle with him. You happily put your head in the crook of his neck, taking in his scent fully.

"I'm sorry for being such a fool."

He shook his head. "You're not a fool, don't say that."

"I am." you sniffed and that's when he realized you had started crying. "I'm so stupid for going out with so many jackasses. I wanted to forget you."

"Forget me?"

"I love you so much that it hurts." you declared, but Jisung only froze, so you continued. "I'm scared of losing you if I tell you I love you. I guess it's too late now, but yeah. I'm sorry for being a fool by not telling you sooner."

He wasn't sure if you were aware of what was happening but he didn't care. If there was one thing he knew about you when drunk is that you were always honest.

"I might be a fool too, then."

"You're not. You're kind-hearted, attentive, pretty and you give good advices. You're always doing things according to me so you know I feel comfortable and I never thank you for it."

He kept on stroking your hair in silence as you continued on giving him compliments. Maybe you weren't going to remember it, but he wanted to make sure he did by listening to every single word you let out attentively.

"I love you, Ji." you said to finish your monologue, your voice getting weaker as you grew tired.

He smiled to himself for how adorable you were. "I love you too."

"Remind me tomorrow." you whispered but loud enough for him to hear.

You woke up with the worst headache. Opening your eyes slowly, you took in on your surroundings. You were in Chan's room which was a good sign as it meant you didn't leave with a random person. But there was a random person next to you. You then noticed the ball of hair that was too familiar to your liking. Had you slept with Jisung? Checking your outfit real quick, you concluded you did not as you still had your clothes on. So how did you end up in Chan's bed with your best friend? It wasn't the first time you slept in the same bed but with the circumstances, you felt awkward.

It was only a few minutes later that Jisung stretched out his arms as he woke up. He seemed to be doing better than you as he was smiling contently. However, when his eyes opened to meet yours, he jumped out of the bed.

"I wanted to wake up first to not freak you out, I'm sorry. I swear nothing happened." he was quick to explain.

"It's fine." you responded as you sat up, bringing the blanket close to your chest. "Did you sleep okay?"

"Yeah, what about you?" You shook your head and Jisung's eyes widened. "Right, you drank a lot yesterday. Do you want me to get you something? A Tylenol, some water, more blankets?"

As much as you were still angry with him, his caring personality made its way to your heart. So you let him take care of you. He left to go to the kitchen and you heard some arguing with Chan. It was something along the lines of stealing his bed again or whatever. He was quick to come back with a pill and a glass of water. You swallowed it in one-go and then invited Jisung to sit with you. Like a puppy, he did as told and waited patiently for you to talk.

"Why did we sleep together?"

"You were really drunk and I just wanted to tuck you in, I promise. But you kind of forced me to stay and then one thing led to another..."

"Don't tell me we kissed again." you cut him off.

"No! I would never let you do so while intoxicated."

It reassured you on so many levels. "Alright, then what happened?"

"You confessed."

It was as if the words triggered your brain into remembering the moment you were attempting to tell him you loved him, and a slight memory of him saying it back appeared in your mind. You weren't sure whether you were imagining things.

"And I asked you to remind me today about it, right?"

He smiled. "So you remember."

"Vaguely."

A silence settled in the room. You had clearly told him everything on your mind and he did the same. The only thing left to do was to decide what to do now. Neither of you wanted to speak first. For you, it was because you were scared of things becoming weird, but for him, it was because he was scared to death that you'd take back everything you said the night before.

"Kids, breakfast!" Chan yelled from the kitchen.

"In a minute." the both of you yelled back at the same time.

This caused for you to break into laughter, diffusing the tension. Jisung joined you and calmed down a little.

"Listen," he started once you stopped laughing. "I was being serious. I love you and I've been in love with you since... I don't even remember when but it's been a while."

Your cheeks turned pink at his words. "Me too."

"I'm sick of seeing you getting hurt by all of these guys because I know I'd treat you a thousand times better. I know I'm not a jock or anything, but I promise my feelings are genuine."

You rushed you wrapped your arms around his body making you fall on your sides into the mattress. Jisung hmphed at the sudden contact, though he was quick to return the hug.

"I know, you idiot. You already treat me like a damn goddess, I can't imagine how you'll treat me now."

"Does it mean that you love me too?"

You laughed at how clueless he was. "Yes, Ji. I love you too and I'd love it if we go out someday."

"As a date?"

"As a date."

He couldn't contain the joy he felt anymore and grabbed the back of your neck you pull you into a long and loving kiss. It felt even better than the last time and you held him tighter to pull him even closer. You pulled away to get some air.

"I'm sorry but I couldn't stop myself." he said, embarrassed.

"Kiss me again?"

He smirked at you and kissed you again at your demand. You started to pull his jacket away from his shoulders and he took the hint that you wanted it off. As he kept on kissing you, he grew more confident and moved his hand down to your thigh. He grabbed it tightly which caused you to let out a gasp. He smiled into your lips, satisfied with your reaction. You decided to play as well and you started to graze your fingers across his abdomen. You had seen him shirtless many times but feeling his abdominal muscles was much different than admiring them from afar. You moved your fingers to the hem of his pants, trying to find the button to undo it.

"You want to do this here?" he broke the kiss and grabbed your wrist to prevent you from moving any further.

"I've been wanting to fuck you ever since the first time you changed clothes in my room." you admitted and it only made him smirk again.

"You liked what you saw?"

"Yes. Now, can we get to business?"

"Yes, ma'am."

You never knew being called like this would do something to you, but you felt like you were melting. He continued to touch you all over your body, always making sure you were comfortable, and he finally got your shirt off. He flipped you to be on top and started to place a few pecks down your neck to your bellybutton.

"Guys, I said breakfast is-"

Jisung was quick to bring the blanket over you, covering your body that was half-dressed.

"For fuck's sake. Guys, this is the last time I'm letting you both stay in my bed. Get dressed now!"

You stayed in silence when Chan closed the door abruptly.

"Is he mad?" you asked and Jisung could only chuckle.

"He's fine." He leaned down to give you, yet, one more kiss. "You have no idea how happy I am right now."

"I think I know, because I couldn't be happier myself."

His smile grew and you were the one to kiss him this time.

"Guys!" Chan yelled from the kitchen again.

"Coming!"

#stray kids #stray kids x reader #stray kids fanfic #stray kids scenarios #stray kids college au #stray kids fluff #stray kids your eyes #stray kids han #han jisung #han jisung x reader #han jisung scenarios #han jisung fanfic #han jisung fluff

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fixfoxnox · 9 months

Text

Attention - SoapRoach

Description: Roach knows that his boyfriend is a busy man. He's a Captain in the military with so many responsibilities. Still, with another day of plans missed in favor of paperwork, he's craving attention and he intends to have it.

Note: Based on the wonderful art done by the wonderful @miilkybnn (sorry for how much I've been tagging you in stuff lately 😅). Here are the two pieces, please go give them some love, they're incredible. 🧼 🪳

Warnings: Smut, Angst, Hurt and Comfort, tiny bit of fluff, Ghost is there for a second BTW, he's hyping Roach up, Dom/Sub tones

Word Count: 4.4k

Roach tapped his foot impatiently on the ground, nerves tugging at his chest. The longer he stood and the more nervous that he got, he already felt like he was on the verge of tears. The sound of his foot tapping impatiently rang around him, echoing in the dark to mix in with the sounds of crickets and frogs serenading the night. It only drove home the silence that surrounded him.

He crossed his arms over his chest, feeling the need for some sort of comfort as he glanced once again at the front door of the building. He was trying his hardest to give Soap the benefit of the doubt. He was hoping beyond hope that the man had simply gotten caught up in his paperwork and was rushing out to meet him now. They had reservations. They had plans. Roach had cleared his entire schedule to make a cute night out with his boyfriend. He'd even gone so far as to stash some...things in their shared room for when Soap would inevitably turn grabby, and they'd return to their room together.

Roach should have known better. At this point, he should have expected it because, well, Soap was Roach's boyfriend, but Captain MacTavish always won out over Soap and, by extension, Roach. Usually, it wasn't a problem. Usually, he loved how hard working and dedicated Soap was to his work and to the team. Usually.

Now, though, with the last four of their dates either canceled or rescheduled or changed because Soap had gotten himself too caught up in work to remember, Roach was frustrated. He'd had his fill of Captain MacTavish. Now he wanted his Soap. Roach wanted to finally have the man's attention to himself. No phone on just in case someone needed to call. No late dates. None of that. He wanted Soap to focus on him, to put him in front of his work at least once.

The door beside him opened, and Roach turned quickly, hope filling him as he did. It was dashed to pieces as he met the eyes of Ghost. Not Soap. He deflated a bit, tucking into himself further as he turned away from his Liutenant.

"Well," Ghost chuckled while taking several steps forward, "don't look too happy to see me." He nudged Roach's side playfully before digging into his pocket to pull out a pack of cigarettes. Roach watched him pop one into his mouth before flicking open a lighter he'd pulled from who knows where to light the end of it.

"Sorry," he apologized quietly, his voice betraying how upset he was. "I was just expecting -"

"Captain?" Ghost guessed. He glanced at Roach from the corner of his eyes, and Roach avoided his gaze. He turned his attention to the ground, kicking at a rock with his foot as something heavy laid over his chest. "He's in his office. Buried in paperwork like usual."

"Of course he is," Roach grumbled under his breath. He didn't want to be mad. Roach wasn't someone who typically held things against others. In fact, oftentimes, he'd been told by members of the team that he was far too forgiving. He just couldn't shake it, though. He didn't like being angry. Now, though, there was a bubbling of white hot anger that seemed to move through his veins and simmer in his chest. He didn't like being angry, but God, he was so mad.

"I'm guessing," Ghost leaned against the wall next to him, crossing his arms over his chest before reaching up to pull the cigarette from his mouth, "You two had plans?"

"Yeah," Roach brought a hand up to rub over his face, trying not to let too much of his anger show. "Yeah, we did." He pulled his phone from his pocket, dialing the number of the restaurant and hovering his finger over the button to call. He needed to cancel their reservation and let the restaurant know that they could give the table to someone else. He didn't call. Instead, he just stared at it until his screen went dark. "I guess I should go back inside. If he forgot, then there's no point in waiting out here for him."

He tucked his phone back into his pocket and tilted his head up, looking at the dark sky above them for several moments. "You know," Ghost started carefully, "I hope you don't plan to let him off the hook easy for this one."

Roach turned toward him quickly, dread pooling in his chest. "What?"

Ghost took his time in responding, puffing out the smoke from his cigarette for several long moments. "This is, what?" He tilted his head at Roach, "Date number three that he's done this to you?"

"Four," Roach corrected quietly. "It's the fourth time."

"Four times is too many," Ghost shook his head and gave a small tut. A moment of silence hung in the air between them. Roach knew Ghost was right, of course, he knew Ghost was right. He'd been thinking the exact same thing. The only difference is that he knew he'd never have the guts to voice it.

"I know," he agreed. "I don't know what to do."

"Talk to him," Ghost suggested. Roach watched him toss his cigarette but to the ground and stomp his foot over it. "Get mad, Roach. I can see you're upset. Make him realize that you're upset." He pushed himself off of the wall and started back to the door of the building. Suddenly, he paused.

There was a moment that passed before he turned around and marched back over to Roach. "I'm serious, you know?" His voice was careful, and he reached up to pull the sunglasses from his face and lift his mask up enough that Roach could talk to Simon. Not Ghost. Simon.

"I know," Roach answered him quietly.

"You're worth more than what he's giving right now." Simon shook his head at him and made sure to meet his eyes, "You gotta make him realize that. Get mad. Yell. Punish him. Do something and -" he cut himself off with a click of his tongue and a shake of his head, "and don't stop until you've made him grovel. Until he's begging you to forgive him."

The two locked eyes and, for a long moment, they stayed like that. Understanding passed between them. "Thanks, Simon."

Simon hesitated for a long moment before giving Roach a nod. He tugged his mask back down and threw the glasses on top, leaving Roach staring at Ghost once again. Ghost leaned forward to give his shoulder a slight squeeze. "Give him hell, Bug."

With those words, he turned and quickly disappeared inside, once again leaving Roach alone in the dark of the night.

Roach stood outside of Soap's office, his eyes trailing over the neat name plate on the door. Captain John MacTavish. He could hardly stand the sight of the name at the moment. He was mad at Captain MacTavish. He was mad at Soap.

Still, he kept his composure. He didn't like being mad, so he tried not to be as he reached up to give several quick knocks to the door. He knew Ghost wanted him to be mean, wanted him to be mad, but Roach couldn't. He just wasn't like that.

He waited patiently, listening for any call from the other side of the door. Nothing. He knocked again. Another few minutes went by, and there was still no response. He didn't knock again. He knew that if Soap hadn't answered, that meant that the man was too far into his work to pay attention to him. Too far in to actually hear when someone knocked.

He pushed the door open without any further alert of his presence. The door opened silently, but Roach wasn't quiet as he stepped into the room and shut it a little louder than he normally would behind him. His eyes were locked on to Soap the entire time, but he only received a brief glance from Soap before the man focused himself back on the papers on his desk. A flash of anger burst through his chest at the move, but he ignored it.

He stood at the door for several moments. The only sounds in the room were the ticking of the clock on the wall and the scratch of Soap's pen on paper. Roach waited patiently, giving Soap the chance to acknowledge him. To maybe realize what he'd done and apologize before Roach had to spell it out to him. He could never be so lucky.

He took slow steps toward Soap's desk, the sound of his boots hitting the floor echoed around him. He crossed his arms over his chest as he stopped in front of Soap's desk. He waited another moment, but Soap still never looked up at him. Finally, in a voice that was much calmer than he felt, he asked, "Did you forget something?"

Soap glanced up at him from his papers again, but it was clear to see that he still wasn't paying attention. His mind was focused on work and work alone. Something about that made Roach angrier. "I don't think so." He answered back quickly.

"Soap." Roach called his name, his voice betraying how annoyed he felt. Soap didn't look up at him again. "Soap." Roach spoke a little louder. His voice was a little harsher. "Soap!"

Roach gave in to the anger he felt just briefly, just long enough that he didn't even think before rounding the desk and grabbing the paper that Soap was working on to yank it out from under his pen. The move left a streak of ink across the paper, and Soap was quick to stand up, his own face ticked with annoyance. Still, he didn't look at Roach. Instead, he just tried to fix the papers that Roach had displaced.

"Roach, I really don't have time for -"

"Soap," Roach reached out to grab Soap's face, tired of trying to get his attention. He used his grip to turn Soap so that he was forced to look at him. "Look at me!"

There was a pause. Soap blinked at Roach in shock, his entire face betraying his surprise. Roach could see the beginnings of a blush raising across the other man's face, and a part of him felt more then smug about that fact. "Roach," Soap breathed out. Slowly, Roach released his hand on Soap's face.

He took in a deep breath, trying to remember himself. He didn't want to be angry. He didn't like being angry. "Soap," he met his boyfriend's eyes, "did you forget something?"

Soap stared at him, searching his face for a long moment. Roach could see the moment that realization dawned on his boyfriend's face, the moment that he realized that he had indeed forgotten something. "Roach," he breathed out again, "I am so sorry." Roach turned away from him, leaning against his desk for support. "I am so so sorry, I just got caught up and-"

"It's alright," Roach assured him, shaking his head at himself as he did. "I already canceled the reservation."

"Let me make this up to you?" Soap turned back to his desk, "I swear I will make this up to you, okay? Just let me finish this paperwork, and I'll take you out."

Roach's head shot to the side, his eyes wide as he watched Soap sit back down in his desk chair, his attention returning to the papers in front of him. "Are you-"

"I promise I will fix this," Soap pulled some of the papers back in front of him, "I will make this up to you tenfold and we'll go get something to eat and we can reschedule our date night. I'll take the next one off-"

"That's what you said this time," Roach reminded him, still watching with wide eyes and growing anger as Soap returned his attention to the papers, his pen already scratching at the paper again.

"Yes, but I'm serious this time." Soap muttered the words, his attention already gone from Roach. With it went Roach's patience.

"You-" Roach's clenched his jaw, a burning heat of anger flooding through him. He could hear Ghost's words echoing around in his head.

"You gotta make him realize that. Get mad. Yell. Punish him. Do something, and don't stop until you've made him grovel. Until he's begging you to forgive him."

Before Roach could really think over what he was doing, he'd moved his hands to Soap's shoulders and shoved, pushing the man back until his chair was far enough from the desk that he could clamber onto his lap.

"Roach?" Soap's hands flew to Roach's waist, but Roach didn't let them stay there for long. He grabbed at Soap's wrists and with a surprising amount of strength and a lot of help from Soap being caught off guard, he was able to yank Soap's hands away and pin them to the arms of the chair he was in. "Roach?"

"Keep them there," Roach hissed, his face serious, "don't touch."

Soap's eyes widened, and Roach could see that blush from before return. This time, though, it stayed to linger over Soap's cheeks and trail down his neck. "Roach," he breathed out, "what's going on?"

"Do you know how many of our dates you've blown off in a row?" Roach asked him, his voice deceptively calm. His face was still stormy, though, and even as he moved closer to Soap, pressing their hips together temptingly, it didn't fade.

"I," Soap stopped for a moment, his mind fully registering what Roach was asking him. He felt his heart sink into his chest as he realized exactly what this was about. "I don't know."

Roach scoffed and ground his hips down, pulling a gasp from Soap's lips and a small sigh of satisfaction from his own. "Four dates," he glared at the man beneath him, "Four dates that you've blown me off on." He paused for a moment before adding, "I'm beginning to think you're trying to tell me something."

"No!" Soap rushed to speak, but he cut himself off as Roach rolled his hips against him again. "No, ah, uh, no Roach, that's not what's been happening."

"Why then?" Roach asked the words carefully. He carded a hand through Soap's hair, tugging until the other was forced to meet his eyes and hold his gaze as Roach asked, "Is your work more important than me?"

"No," Soap was quick to assure, "of course not Roach thats not- oh fuck!"

Roach cut him off with a hand pressed against his crotch, palming him through his pants. He could feel as the other was growing harder against him. "Really? Then why won't you pay attention to me, hmm?"

"I do pay attention to you," Soap moved his hands from the arms of his chair, once again wrapping the around Roach's waist to tug him closer, "I've just been -"

"Ignoring me," Roach finished, glaring him down, "and blowing me off for paperwork. Is paperwork more interesting than me?" He tilted his head before moving closer, not stopping until his lips were just hovering over Soap's.

"No," Soap shook his head rapidly, "of course not."

"Apparently, it is." Roach reached back to once again grab Soap's hands and press them against the arms of the chair. He gave the man a glare before releasing his grip on Soap's wrists, reminding the man with only a look that he shouldn't move. A hand returned to Soap's hair, giving a slight tug at the strands between his fingers. Soap groaned at the slight pain.

"Since you can't pay attention to me," Roach rolled his hips against Soap's again, a satisfied groan leaving his lips as he felt Soap's hard cock against his own arousal, "You're going to keep your hands off and watch. Understand?"

He tugged at Soap's hair again and, in return, he recieved several rapid nods from the man.

"Good boy," Roach leaned forward to press a short kiss to Soap's lips, only letting the touch linger for a moment before pulling back.

He leaned away from Soap, just enough that he could get a hand between them. He let his fingers brush down Soap's chest, a sick amusement filling him as Soap tried to subtly lean into the touch. He trailed his hand down further and further until he could press his hand against the prominent bulge in his boyfriend's pants.

He took his time, offering a teasing massage of his hand over the other man. Soap's head tilted back, little gasps of pleasure leaving his mouth as Roach touched him. "God," Roach watched as his eyes closed and his mouth fell open. "You're so perfect. It feels so good."

Roach removed his hand at those words, causing Soap to lean back up and look down between them. Roach didn't touch him again, and he hardly paid him any mind. Instead, he let his hands lower to his own pants.

He wasted no time, swiftly undoing his belt, followed by the button and zipper of his trousers. He tucked his hand into his pants, stroking himself over his underwear for a long moment, letting Soap watch the movement of his hand and hear his little pants and moans.

"If only it was you touching me," Roach whispered the words, letting them sit heavily between them as he finally pulled his underwear down, pulling his hard cock out to let it rest between their bodies. The tip of his cock was resting against Soap's stomach and Roach could hear his boyfriend's stuttered breath.

"It could be me touching you," Soap managed to choke out. He and Roach gave a simultaneous groan as Roach wrapped a hand around himself, starting a slow rhythm with his hand. Roach noted the harsh grip that Soap had on the chair, clearly wanting to move and take over control of the situation.

Roach let himself fuck his fist, moving with slow but tight strokes over his cock. He felt unbelievably hot and he had to admit that having Soap underneath him, listening to whatever he said, it was so hot. It was meant to be a punishment and make the other realize what hecwas missing, but Roach found himself enjoying the desperate attention and pleas of the man underneath him.

"No, no," Roach sped his hand up, the feel of his hand on his heated skin was almost too much, "you clearly don't want to touch me." He leaned back, using Soap's desk to keep himself up and push himself that much further from Soap's touch. He tilted his head back as he sped his movements up, fucking his fist quicker with little jerks of his hips. "Fuck," he whined out.

"Roach," Soap gave a groan, "I'm sorry, really I-"

"You're not sorry," Roach cut him off, his voice a mix of harsh desperation. "You just want to touch." He brought his free hand up, slipping it under his shirt to toy with his nipples beneath the fabric. He could hear Soap's breath hitch at the move. "Is this what I have to do to get your attention?"

He flicked a finger over one of his nipples, trying to mimic the way that Soap would always tease him when they were together. It wasn't the exact same, but it was good enough for Roach, who happily groaned at the feeling. Every touch sent a spark down his spine that went straight to his aching cock. Every groan and desperate plea for him that left Soap's mouth followed a similar path, though they burned Roach with both pleasure and anger.

Several moments of silence lingered between the two, filled only with the sounds of Roach's pleasured moans and Soap's answering groans. Roach could feel how hard the man was underneath him, the length of him pressing against his ass. Roach gave himself a moment longer of just stroking over his cock before he finally started to rock his hips, grinding purposefully against the man beneath him.

Soap's own hips jolted up a bit, trying hard to seek some sort of relief to his own arousal. Roach allowed him the movement, knowing that it was next to nothing for the man beneath him. He knew that it would take Soap much more than the rocking pressure that he was offering. The man would only drive himself crazier. The thought made him feel a bit satisfied. Let Soap be the one craving his attention.

Their moans joined together, both of them panting and groaning as the temperature around them grew hotter and hotter. Roach sped up his hand, his legs beginning to shake just a bit as pleasure zipped up his spine and coiled tighter and tighter in his gut.

His skin felt hotter and hotter, and soon, he was jerking forward, burying his face into Soap's neck as it grew to be almost too much for him. He whined into Soap's neck, pressing desperate kisses there as he continued to fuck into his fist, the tip of his cock rutting up against Soap's shirt adding just an extra bit of pleasure.

"I miss you," he managed to choke out between his moans, "I miss you so much. Fuck I want- oh," he gave several open mouthed pants against Soap's shoulder. He could feel as one of Soap's hands moved away from the seat to grab at his hips, helping him continue to rock forward into his fist. He couldn't find it in himself to chide Soap at the moment, not when he felt an odd mix of anger, sadness, and overwhelming pleasure swarming together to create a cocktail of desire.

"I wish you would choose me over work," he managed to choke out after a moment, "I wish you'd pay attention to me."

There was no moment for Soap to respond. Roach was already too far gone, his mind fizzing out around the pleasure of his hand as his words devolved into nothing but chants of Soap's name. It only took him a few move moments before his body went completely tense, his cock jerking in his hand as pleasure washed over him and he came across Soap's stomach.

He collapsed fully against Soap's shoulder, a small whimper escaping his throat as his oversensative cock brushed against the other's now dirtied shirt. Soap helped him settle down fully into his lap. Neither of them said a word, even as Soap remained hard against Roach's thigh. They just sat there for several moments, wrapped up in the other.

Eventually, Roach pulled back and started to climb off of Soap and fix himself up. He tucked himself back into his pants and started to redo his belt

"Um," his voice cracked a bit, and he reached up to wipe at his face, already feeling as though tears were slipping down his face, "I'm gonna go back to the room. I'll see you when you get done?"

"Roach," Soap tugged him closer, reaching out to wrap around his waist and pull him closer. Roach placed his hands on Soap's shoulder and looked down at him, trying hard not to let too much show on his face. Soap met his eyes and held his gaze for a moment. "I am sorry."

"Soap," Roach started trying to tug himself away, but he was quickly pulled back by Soap.

"No," Soap tugged him back, "I really am sorry, okay? I didn't realize what I was doing. I didn't realize I was hurting you." He tucked Roach tight against him, holding him as close as he could. "It's not an excuse. I shouldn't have done it."

"It's fine," Roach muttered quietly. He brought a hand up to Soap's hair, petting through it for several moments as Soap laid a head on his chest. "I know work is important."

"Not as important as you," Soap whispered back. Roach felt himself go warm at the words, a fluttery feeling blossoming in his chest. Hearing those words made him feel good. It made him feel wanted. "I'll make this up to you."

Roach shook his head, a small smile tugging at the side of his mouth, "Soap you don't have to-"

"I'm serious," Soap stood from his seat and pressed Roach back against the desk. "I'll take the entire day off, and I'll make the plans." He leaned forward to press a short kiss to the corner of Roach's mouth, "I won't even bring my phone. It'll be a day about just me and you. I'll give you all the attention that you deserve."

He pressed forward again, capturing Roach's mouth against his own in a slow kiss. Roach couldn't help but relax into the feeling, letting Soap work his magic with his mouth. It was calming to just let Soap press into him like this. "I would like that," Roach muttered against his lips. "I would really like that."

Soap pulls back and grabs Roach's hand in his own. "C'mon, let's go get something to eat. I can finish this stuff up tomorrow."

He starts tugging Roach toward the door, but Roach yanks back on his hand, stopping him. When he turns back to Roach with an eyebrow raised, he's met with a slight grin from the other. "Maybe we should both go change first? And take care of some other things."

Roach motioned down at Soap's body, toward the cum still staining his shirt and the very clear hard on that he still had. There was a moment of silence as Soap looked down at himself before he gave a quiet, "Ah," and looked back up to meet Roach's eyes. He watched for a moment as Roach tried to hide his laughter behind his hands. He could feel amusement pull at him as he took stock of the situation. "This is your fault you know."

Soap took a step toward Roach, a grin on his face. Roach gave another laugh into his hands and took another step back, "It absolutely is not."

"It is," Soap chimed. He started toward Roach with a grin, and Roach gave a nervous squeak before rushing back around the desk with a laugh, "You've got to help me with this, you know?"

"No, no," Roach tried to dodge around Soap, but he was quickly hauled back toward Soap and pressed closer to him again. He gave a laugh, completely uncaring as the cum on Soap's shirt transferred to his own. It already had once before, so he wasn't too worried. Instead, his attention was focused on the hard cock he could feel pressed against him.

"C'mon," Soap nipped at his neck, a grin clear to hear in his voice, "didn't you want my attention? You've got all of it now, Bug."

Roach did always enjoy Soap's attention.

#gary roach sanderson #john soap mactavish #call of duty #soaproach #captain mactavish #simon ghost riley #call of duty fanfic

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autistichalsin · 5 months

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Okay, I’ve been a bit scared because I’ve been observing from the sidelines, but I do want you to know this isn’t a hateful or troll ask, I’m genuinely asking for clarification.

In my experience, “pro-shipping” has always meant ‘problematic shipping’, and all of the people I’ve talked to about this have said the same thing.

Am I the one who’s misconstrued? I really don’t get it.

Being called “pro-harassment” or “pro-censorship” is hurtful and confusing as all hell.

I don’t harass people for what they create. I don’t care to do that. I block and move on, and warn people if I know they could be upset by the content.

But I also don’t understand how certain things are justified.

I am personally not bothered by much, but I have watched friends and acquaintances go through visceral traumatic reactions because people have decided to air out their coping by sharing it with the public. (I.E, people who write romantic incestual fics, etc)

I don’t give a shit what people write. I really don’t. But it feels harmful to use the excuse of coping when you, in turn, could be hurting dozens of others.

Like I said, I genuinely am not trying to be hateful here. I’m confused, and still distraught that all of this is happening. I don’t think anyone deserves to be harassed. I just also don’t get the logic here.

Pro-shipping never once meant problematic shipping. It meant opposite of "anti" because antis would come and invade the tags and asks, calling them all kinds of names if they found their ships distasteful.

Sorry that being indirectly accused of supporting harassment hurt your feelings. Imagine how I felt, being DIRECTLY accused of supporting rape in real life because of my taste in fiction. You are throwing in your lot with people who can't distinguish fantasy and reality.

I don't like incest fics either, anon. They are triggering for me. So you know what I do? I don't read fics tagged as incest. For that reason, I have never been triggered by an incest fic. I suppose I would be if I read an incest fic that wasn't tagged as much, but you will never find a single pro-shipper who defends posting such content without a tag. You are responsible for your own experience online; it is your job to curate the content.

If it was just seeing that the fic exists that triggered the response, then I'm sorry to say they're still in the wrong. As a survivor, learning that triggers exist and how to navigate those triggers is on you. We are responsible for how we deal with our trauma. Your friends didn't deserve their traumas, and they deserve kindness and support, but requesting that people never be allowed to write distasteful fiction so that they don't have to be upset by the idea that someone somewhere shipped incest is not reasonable. Their feelings are valid; it's totally reasonable to be triggered, to strictly curate your online experience. It's reasonable to block everyone who ships the upsetting incest ships, to put an "incest shippers DNI" on your page, all of it. It's not reasonable to call them supporters of IRL incest or to accuse them of causing your trauma. It isn't hard at all on AO3 or Tumblr; they even give you the option to blacklist/filter out certain tags so you can avoid it without blocking users. There's easily half a dozen safeguards that already exist that are a lot less radical, a lot less likely to be weaponized against queer users, and a lot easier to enforce than trying to remove them.

Me writing fics, such as a character using kink to cope, can only harm a user who doesn't curate their feed (and who reads fics they know will trigger them, which I can only assume would then be a purposeful form of self-harm). Denying other survivors their coping mechanism, though, IS a direct form of harm. Stigmatizing recovery by saying that survivors are in any way akin to abusers for creating fiction is a direct form of harm.

It sounds to me like you've absorbed some very harmful and very narrow ideas of what recovery should and should not look like, and what is and isn't a good/valid survivor. You might want to reflect on why you're turning your attention to policing what survivors do to cope so much.

#proship #proshipper #discourse

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snapscube · 1 year

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is it possible you could put TOTK stuff under the cut for a small while? Me and a few other people I know got spoiled on some things because we follow your account and we don't have a ton of time to play

I really hope to not sound rude or a bit hypocritical but I'm not really down to change the formatting of my posts? I have been tagging almost everything I post about TOTK with "zelda" and "totk" which are like, very mute-able. The only clip I ever posted without tags was just a shot of some horses in an area you could also just find in BOTW that was mostly grass, and believe me aside from the UI changes I combed it very closely to make sure I wasn't showing off something too crazy.

I've also been going out of my way to keep shared footage mostly to stuff that you can find relatively early on if you follow the pretty obvious directions the game points you toward at the start of it. Maybe I'm just desensitized with how much I've played already but I was under the impression that a lot of the stuff I've shown is realllyyy basic save for a couple things that I made sure to put later in my clip compilations so anyone who didn't want to see ANYTHING about the game from my playthrough would have time to scroll past.

I understand that just tagging isn't going to cover all scenarios where someone could see something they don't want to and I'm sympathetic, I've had certain armor type discoveries spoiled for me and I was a bit frustrated at that so it may sound hypocritical for me to defend my own posting, but the difference there is that the stuff I saw that frustrated me was completely untagged, not even with general tags for the game so I couldn't even have avoided it if I wanted to. I at the very least am giving people the same essential courtesies I expect when posting about a new game.

If that hasn't been enough for y'all specifically and you saw more than you wanted to, I am sorry and I assure you I really have no plans to go too crazy with clip posting or anything on here, a vast majority of my experience will be contained to YouTube content for a long while, but also if my current style is too much then of course no hard feelings if you need to unfollow until you've played sufficiently for yourself. Also, if it's any consolation, I can assure you that there are like thousands of discoveries in this game that are 20x cooler than anything I have shared outside of my VODs.

#also i am still open to being in the wrong here if enough people corroborate that my current posting style is too spoilery #i can take an L but i did want to briefly defend my funny video posts lol

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outcaststars · 2 months

Text

I've been streaming on twitch for over 4 years. I've made a great community and a wonderful group of friends but I've also had to deal with a lot of aweful people. Recently I've been feeling particularly upset about it all so I'm going to air all my grievances here. TW this mentions bullying, grooming, self harm and abuse. If anyone mentioned in this post trys to comment im just gonna delete it, i also dont care if your fav streamers is here, this is my authentic experience. Also dont go attacking anyone i mention here, the whole point of this is to be better then them.

Rat_emoji

The first streamer I ever had an issue with was Rat_emoji. It all started when I tuned into one of their DbD streams only to find him streaming another, younger, streamers live content.

He had just died to this kid playing Myers, he had TTV in his name and Rat was so mad about what had happened he streamed this kids twitch live to his viewers, all the while making fun of his appearance and stream quality.

A day later I would go back and screen record this whole interaction so I can share that if you want to see it. It felt so disgusting to watch this happen live, he has 100 viewers in chat and they were all being nasty. The only person who told him to stop was drag streamer Suttonfister (i think, 90% sure) who was in the same game and discord call at he time. the whole scene was aweful to witness, it felt like such an abuse of power. Rat didnt directly say anything mean but they made a lot of mean girl comments and didnt moderate anything cruel their chat said, it was obviously intentional.

After this I blocked Rat, it would have been easy to avoid him if he didn't found the stream team "Aussie pride", he got a lot of attention for that and a lot of praise and all of it made me sick. Funnily enough I heard that Aussie Pride was an aweful team to be in. The creators didn't care about the smaller members, planned no events and then disbanded the team with the release of Hogwarts legacy because they didn't want to take a stance on JK Rowling. Honestly it seems like the whole thing was a vanity project. That's why I don't like Rat_emoji.

Dcypherpup

DCpup was the first streamer I tried to network with. He hired me to make some art for him. He wanted me to work on merch for his channel, I declined, saying that I wasnt comfortable with the idea of someone else selling my art. I counter offered to just make him a profile icon, this way we could see how my style suited him and i could work out how to tackle the idea of eventually doing merch.

When the icon was done I sent him the high res file, he asked for my signature (my artist tag, a very small "outcaststars" in the corner) to be removed. When I asked why, he told me he needed it gone in order to upload it as merch.

Naturally I was upset. I explained that we had already made a deal not to do merch yet and I also explained that I was uncomfortable with the idea of removing my tag. I went on to explain why visibility was so important for artists. At the time I was a much smaller content creator and DCpup platform was much bigger.

He apologized and said he would give me a cut of the sales. I said don't bother and reluctantly let him do what he wanted. At the time I was too scared to make enemies so I fell into people pleasing.

I took more work from DCpup because I needed the money and I hoped it would be good for my channel growth. He would upload my work to his store and wouldn't credit me. I was frustrated.

The tipping point was after the final comm I took from him. An animated ending screen. During this process DCpup would message me everyday asking for updates which was annoying. When I delivered the final product he once again asked for my tiny, half transparent signature to be removed. I was so upset and defeated, I told myself I'd fight it but I didn't. I removed my sign from every layer, reanimated the whole thing and vowed not to take work from him.

After the piece was done he wanted to commission me again. I left him on read, then I found out what he was saying about me to other people. A good friend of mine showed me a message he had sent in his stream, telling him not to bother commission me, because I would be too busy doing work for him. I was furious.

Another week later I got raided by someone and told the new viewers to check out my work, it broke my heart when someone who looked at my insta, told me he had no idea I made all of DCpups stuff. Why would he? Dcypherpup went to ridiculous lengths to hide my credit. He was telling people not to contact me and not tagging any comm work with my name. One day he came into my live stream and I was so mad I banned him on the spot .

I wish I had done more to be assertive, live and learn. Funnily enough I found out he posted a big rant, telling people off for supporting JK Rowling when Hogwarts legacy released. Only to be called out for buying it and playing it on his steam, which he had forgotten to make private. He deleted the tweet. What a cunt.

Undertheredmoon and Greenypika

Redmoon is furry streamer that I use to really like. They were funny, had great energy and I would even go as far to say that they were a friend.

All this came to a grinding hault the day he invited furry artist and accused child groomer Daveoverlord to join us on Monster hunter rise live on stream.

Dave wasn't in voice chat and I wasn't reading Redmoons twitch chat at the time, so although I was aware of who Dave was, I didn't realize it was them. When someone messaged me about it a few days later I was mortified, I assumed Redmoon didn't know and I messaged them immediately.

I asked Red if he knew who Dave was and what he had done and the kind of artists he was friends with (cub artists). Redmoon ghosted me, left me on read for a week. I messaged again asking why he wasn't talking to me. He said he was too stressed to deal with this "drama" and didn't care to get involved. He mentioned that if Dave was guilty cops probably would have gotten involved and said he just wanted to focus on his own work.

When I asked Redmoon where he stood on cub porn, he stopped replying. We haven't spoken since.

The same person who told me about Dave joining stream also pointed out that Greenypika was inviting Dave onto his stream. They dm'd greeny and asked them if they knew and greeny said he had no idea and that he'd look into it. Greeny hadn't responded for a few months so I dm'd him with the same message and got the same copy paste reply. TLDR greeny knew and was just lying about it so I blocked him too.

Daveoverlord

Dudes a fucking groomer and now he streams. Blocked.

Cidermarten

Cider and I got into an argument once, the topic of which is no one's business.

His bf weyland got mad at me for it and vague tweeted about it so I decided to start a group chat with them to sort it out. And we did.

I apologised for what I did and cider took some time away from interacting with me. Everyone in this situation wanted what was best. And weyland is now one of my best friends.

Cider and I aren't as close as we could be but that's my fault. They're honestly a wonderful person and I appreciate their friendship. There inclusion in this list is to prove a point later but they're also the only person here who I think deserves success.

Stripeydragon and Break trail.

This one is complicated because it involves someone who ment a lot to me.

Back when the exclusive stream team Break Trail formed, my good friend Marsh joined the team. Being an artist he did a lot of the teams promo art of all it's members. Marsh had a lot of anxieties about the team because he was one of its smallest members and often told me he felt underappreciated or out of place. This feeling for worse when artist/streamer and fellow team member Stripeydragon decided he was going to do a redraw of all of marsh's promo work.

I didn't see Marsh much at the time but when this began he spent the better part of a week in my mod chat expressing how upset he was about it. It didn't help he was already anxious but he felt stripydragon was replacing him and even mentioned a time when he tried to give feedback on stripys work only for him to disregard it. Marsh was really fucking upset.

After stripeydragon posted the work my moderator, Ibn, who had been listening and consoling marsh for a week, decided to comment on the art publically. He said he didn't think stripyes version of the art was better and criticized him of slimming down the fater characters.

I wanna pause this to say I don't condone what Ibn did. He ment well but it wasn't his fight and he shouldn't have commented a critique on something no one asked him to judge. Don't do this. Anyway...

Stripeydragon fucking hated this. Not only did he respond to every tweet, he went into the break trail discord and rallied everyone to defend him and attack Ibn, a lot of break trail members also rushed to the comments to defend stripey and attack ibn. He also posted ibns comment in his own discord to encourage others to dog pile on. This shit got out of hand super fucking fast. Ibn was crying and marsh was pissed. It was betray of trust on Ibns part, but the way stripey responded was downright scary.

Shit was at its peak by the time I woke up (Australian timezone) and I immediately went into damage control. I gave Ibn a huge lecture, I was mad af and told him to apologize. I dm'd breaktrails stream team manager Mari, and tried my best to defuse the situation so that both parties could stop. Everyone deleted their tweets. Ibn apologised a dozen times and Marsh told everyone that ibn was just an asshole.

So the story everyone believes now is that marsh actually loves stripydragons work and Ibn is just a weird jerk. There where no consequences for stripydragons weaponizing a stream team and their fan base against someone on twitter. They're still a member of break trail but the team has been dead for a long time. I understand that Ibn was in the wrong and marsh should have just talked about his issues with his team. But this is another case of someone with a big platform and bigger ego not hesitating to use that to attack others.

Starkymorph

this one is fucked up.

Starky mods for a bunch of break trail members, so he had an inside look into the whole stripeydragon thing. Keep that in mind.

About a year after the stripey incident, I woke up to a message from starky. I had recently finished a commission for starky but apart from that we didn't know each other well.

He claimed that ibn had harassed him on stream by bringing up controversial topics and that because he was my mod he wasn't going to support me any more. I was pretty angry, Ibn was causing trouble again. I dm'd ibn and told him I didn't want to hear what he had to say and instead I just wanted the timestamp on Starkeys VOD so I could see what he did myself.

I watched the VOD and what I saw didn't line up with anything starky had said. He made the whole thing up.

What really happened was, starky decided to bring up "cancel culture" and went on a rant about how it was inherently bad and that anyone who participates in it only does it for "self-aggrandizing reasons". A lot of the shit he said was very thinly veiled right wing bullshit dog whistles.

Ibn asked him to elaborate and said something to the likes of "what about people who cancel pedos and rapists" and starky banned ibn and ended the convo.

Ibn didn't start the controversial topic and he didn't harass anyone. But starky was mad and wanted to attack him, he knew Ibn had a history of starting shit so he came to me with a bullshit story thinking I'd believe him and Ibn would lose his friends. And it almost worked.

I tried to talk some sense into starky, I pointed out that his original message was dishonest. Starky doubled down and made up more lies. He continued to claim that things happened during the stream that aren't in the VOD. He even bought up weylandshere and claimed he was harassing him too, out of nowhere! which if you watch the VOD is also completely made up. He said some ablist shit about "high functioning autism" aswell, its all really incoherent. Non of this is true and I downloaded the VOD so he couldn't hide the evidence.

Starky tried to use my argument with cider and Ibns argument with stripy as evidence that we were bad people. I found this really sinister, because my initial reaction to Starkys story, was that i believed him, pretty much everyone reacted this way. It upsets me that i was almost convinced to distance myself from my best friend because of a lie.

A ton of people didn't watch the VOD and took Starkeys word. Starky blocked me and started asking all his followers and mutuals to do the same. A whole bunch of people sub tweeted about ibn being an abuser and me being an enabler. It was fucking aweful. It went on for days.

This only stopped when Kyziethewolf stepped in and defended me. Even tho starky was one of his best friends, he had watched the VOD and told everyone he was lying. Starky doesn't talk to kyzie now and it really broke his heart.

A lot of people still believe starky and I lost a bunch of mutual streamers support because of this. It's one of the worst attacks I've suffered on twitter/twitch to date.

I found out a few months later he's added "outcast is racist" to the narrative he tells people and there's nothing I can do about that

This also basically ended my friendship with Marsh. I've known marsh for 7 years and hes a friend of Starkeys too. During this whole ordeal he never spoke up, it was only kyzie. I was really upset about this because i feel that Marsh could have made a significant change to how this played out if he had of just stepped in.

When he dm'd me a few weeks after asking if I'm make some free art for his project I told him no. I told him I was hurt. He said he just didn't want to get involved in drama. i think its really harmful to reduce harassment to just "drama". We've stopped talking.

Jayedskier

I met jayed though my friend weyland. I needed a 3D artists and he needed work.

Jayed had recently lost a lot of friends because during COVID he tweeted that people not social distancing at a furcon where putting disabled, high risk, people's lives in danger. Totally righteous imo.

He however also tweeted that anyone who doesn't where a mask should kill themselves and deservingly got a lot of hate and backlash. Lost a lot of friends. Since then he was pretty unwilling to comment on any political shit. Publically that is.

The first fight I got into with jayed was when Ibn reposted a Tumblr thread about the YouTuber keffals, and some of the problematic things she'd done. Jayed loves keffals so he dm'd Ibn about it and started a huge fight defending his favourite YouTuber. I stepped in to try and resolve the fight but no one was really happy.

This argument made jayed realise that he didn't have the same values as the friend group he was in. He liked keffals, he thought it was ok to say the R slur and he felt people should be allowed to support JK Rowling.

He left my discord and I contacted him trying to smooth things over. We talked for a long time and I settled on agree to dissagree the hopes to change his mind on some of these issues.

That didn't happen. Jayed kept starting fights about woke shit, even though he's a self proclaimed "leftist" and it slowly drove a wedge between us. He stopped talking to everyone in our friend group, unfollowed us all on socials.

Artists/streamer and friend Ixu had drawn a big group shot of all of us together. Weyland (who is in this friend group) was pretty angry about the whole ordeal so he asked Ixu for a version without jayed edited out. When he posted this jayed got super pissed about it.

Jayed tweeted about how unwelcoming my community was. Screen caped some DM's and changed the context. I was so angry, I had spent months continuing to offer my friend ship and trying to change his mind. One of the last fights we got into he said he was mad that "people" expected him to show support for Palestine and thats kind of the end of it.

This one hurt because it felt like a betrayal. Jayed you can get fucked dude.

Socksthewolf

This one is super recent and is basically why I decided to write this.

I can't remember how I met socks. They work in the games industry and they have a LOT of money/connections. He gives away a lot of stuff, Donates to people a lot. He very affectionate and Everyone loves him. I even accepted a bunch of charity/gifts from him and in return drew a bunch of gift art.

Socks success made a few mutuals of mine uncomfortable. He had a lot of money to put into stream so his channel grew insanely fast. I'm also told he made comments to some mutuals, comparing channel growth that made them feel bad. He ran multiple giveaways and got partner almost a year after starting stream.

There was some drama between socks and one of his mods. I tried my hardest not to get involved. Socks employs a lot of parasocial strategies in order to retain an audience so he flirts a lot and also has a persona of "I'm you dad" on stream. Idk if this counts as love bombing, but it feels similar.

I heard that one of his mods developed a crush on him and when rejected, he drank himself into the hospital. He almost died.

I spoke with this ex mod about it. He doesn't blame socks for what happened even tho he feels the rejection was harsh. I still feel that socks takes advantage of people with his gifts and parasocial friendship. This is a result of that going unchecked.

One of our mutuals found out about this and was really upset. They tweeted about it and tried to hold socks accountable. Nothing came of it.

I grew distant from socks when he started hanging out with Redmoon a lot. Because I felt close to them at the time I messaged him a about Redmoon and what happened between us. He never replied.

This story takes a dark turn when jayedskier, friend of socks, decided to make that tweet mentioned in his section. Socks also went in on someone jayed had mentioned.

This is about my good friend Weyland. Weyland had had someone very close to them pass away recently. Socks complied some tweets and chat screen caps, and made up a story of weyland threatening to kill themselves.

Some of the messages were about weylands dead friend. Socks knowingly changed the context and lied to make weyland look bad.

I honestly think this is the worst thing on this post. To use the death of someone and the personal anguish of someone and ammo for you bullshit story about them is fucking horrifying.

I replied to socks tweet about weyland, I told him what he was doing was wrong. He told me that he feels bad I'm surrounded by toxic people and that he hopes they get better.

After seeing the way socks treats his audience and the way he lied about another streamer, I genuinely believe hes some kind of abuser. Idk the vibe is REALLY off with this one. This feels worse then bullying, there's an ego about it. I've blocked socks on everything. Frankly they scare me.

Final notes

Anyway that's been my aweful experience with aweful twitch streamers. The whole thing has left me bitter and sad and I no longer want to interact with anyone. idk where to go from here.

Twitch TOS doesn't care what people say or do on other platforms. And with other streamers/mutuals so unwilling to get involved or show support I just feel alone.

I do feel compelled to speak up when I see or experience something I think isn't right. I think a lot of neurodivegant people, like myself, feel that way. But I think it's been terrible for my career. I hate the feeling that I'd be so much more successful if I'd shut my mouth and looked away. Maybe even be partner by now. I know a lot of this comes across as just "furry drama" but i think its reductive to label it as that. Content creators who engage in these kind of harmful behaviors need to be held accountable if we want to see any positive change. And im not saying that means "CANCEL" them. some (not all) of these content creators can still learn and grow and be better. Negative attitudes and dismissive statements of "its just drama" create a space for bullies to thrive

Finally, please PLEASE do NOT under any circumstances harass anyone involved in this post. This is not an attempt to rally the masses to lynch some people, im just telling my story so that next time you see someone come forward with claims about a content creator you like you'll see the situation differently.

If you made it this far, wow. Thank you. Dunno if I'll post the vids/screencap evidence. I don't know if I care enough.

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starflungwaddledee · 3 months

Text

alright. look, we're going to go into this because i genuinely want to think you didn't mean harm by this, but it's unacceptable to use this sort of manipulative phrasing. especially with strangers, some of whom are kids.

this is not a call-out. i've hidden all names except my own. i just need to address this post i was tagged in, and don't want to add it onto the end of the original post. i could also have done this privately, but i want this to be here for the other folks who were @'d. i won't @ anyone else who was mentioned in this post, but many of us are mutuals, so if you see this post and you're feeling at all stressed out or bad, i recommend just clicking through because i'm going to go into this.

firstly, and i'm going to make this transparent, person who @'d me: i don't think you're being malicious or did anything purposefully bad. i don't think you intended harm or that you are "a bad person". i don't have a single negative thought about you as a person. i don't make this post to be mean. i truly think you made an earnest mistake that could easily have hurt others, and i am stepping in with the hope this can be avoided in the future! per my usual boundaries on reassurance seeking, i will not reassure about this further.

secondly, the post that you tacked this onto IS important and a helpful resource, and it is great to bring attention to it. we should be doing everything we can to not only defend against, but actively fight back against generative AI. many people cannot access the most commonly recommended tools (myself included), so a resource like this is fantastic and i'm glad to learn about it and share it! i don't speak for anyone else, but i've said before that i personally don't mind being tagged in resources that could help me or others and i'm usually happy to share them, especially if i think the latter

but, assuming that you are genuinely well meaning and don't know better, you need to know that this is not the way to go about it. i don't mean mass-tagging, which is fine in times like this imo, i mean your written add-ons that actively guilt trip every single person you tagged.

"if you weren't convinced by the idea of being a good person" and "I do hope anyone I @'d isn't a bad person" in particular.

you may not have realised, but these are profoundly manipulative and cruel things to say. regardless of how you intended them, they are inciting guilt in the reader, and especially in the people who you actively called to come and look at it. here's what it sounds like:

"hey! you! yeah you! come look at this!! come closer! now, do what i ask you to do, or you're a bad person."

there are a million and one reasons someone might not reblog something. being tired, offline, anxious, even needing to run a specifically professional blog with exclusively your art on it for your own financial survival which makes it hard to reblog important posts like this; none of those are bad.

in this case, only one thing makes them a "bad person", and it's "they're pro-generative AI and did not reblog because they want to hide this information to ensure they can continue stealing from creatives".

i'm fairly confident you don't actually think anyone you tagged here has that point of view, or that you really have any doubts about their stances on generative AI. in fact, of the folks i recognise here, they're all independent creatives, sharing artwork with fandom for free on the internet. they are the victims of generative AI, and like most of us, are facing a terrifying future and are already desperate to find a way to defend/fight back.

you do not need to use manipulative language like this to get us to care about this sort of content! this affects us all, content creators and content consumers alike!

in future if you want to direct folks to something like this, which is super helpful and it was good of you to do!, you can just @ them so they see it. you can even say something like "this is important and some reblogs would sure help to boost it!". this is still a call to action, but without the manipulative phrasing, just in case they cannot act for any reason.

in the end, guilt tripping people like this, intentional or otherwise, is dangerous.

at best it will make them feel like shit and they'll feel forced to reblog + share from you out of guilt rather than just believing in the cause. and sometimes it feels like it's most effective, especially when things are urgent; but in my opinion the risk of harm is just too high. because at worst, you could accidentally send someone into a negative thinking spiral. you can never know what people are going through offline, or outside of your spaces, and how something like this will hit them.

#idk what to tag this.#it's not really anything. glorified response. reassurance to those who were @'d.#i'll reblog the actual post with the tool itself after this because it was certainly useful!#please do check it out if you're in need of a more accessible anti-AI overlay tool!#reblogs are off because that's not the point and because i don't want this to... idk. get bigger.#i trust this was an accident and this person meant no harm. i trust they had good intentions. don't be mean. don't be mean.#i just want others tagged to know that they aren't bad people so i needed to address this publicly. it's hard. augh.#i know how this would have hit me a decade ago. i know some of the people tagged here are Going Through It. i know some are kids.#i just felt something needed to be said and i was willing to say it. if this is wrong or something feel free to lmk.

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rochelle-echidna · 6 months

Text

@micheladee tagged me in the "post a couple paragraphs of your WIP" share-a-thon, so figured I'd go through my Word docs and see what I could find - thank you so much for the tag, Michela :)

Truth be told, if y'all will allow me to vent a bit first... it's been a bit of a shitter these last couple years, especially wrt getting any sort of writing done. Never mind with fics (of which I feel awful I've barely started anything new, even the WIP below is from last year) - but I've also been trying to finally write a novel of my own after realising I really, really want to... and the words just aren't coming. Whether it's because of fear of ridicule, fear of failure, fear of not being good enough, fear of financial stresses, fear of whatever... it's been really fucking rough since my spouse and I moved cross-country, and I've def been feeling ashamed at my lack of creative output :(

On the bright side, I'm getting some help with therapy and I'm doing a couple workshops to get me back into the swing of being creative so that I can tackle the work-life balance and not feel like the entirety of my (and my spouse's) survival rests squarely on my shoulders. Whether that means I'll be able to post any new work soon is up for debate, but honestly just taking these baby steps is better than nothing, so I'll take what I can get (and my body + mind can give).

And I know there's no "admission fee" to partake in fandom, but I still feel I'd be remiss if I didn't offer a huge apology for not positing fics recently, and especially for not commenting on fics y'all have made in these last several months - please believe me when I say I see y'all's work and it's great and makes me feel so many necessary things, even if I'm not able to type the words on AO3 atm.

Anyhow, just wanted to share an update with y'all and let you know I'm still here, still alive... just taking it one day at a time for now in order to keep my sanity strong!

Enjoy this little snippet of a WIP below, and I tag whoever so chooses to participate in this game - even if I'm quiet, I love seeing everything you lovely people write :D

When he was thrust back to reality in his own body, there was the usual disorientation that was to be expected of someone summoned through the dark arts. After all, if the infamous Thief King from 3,000 years ago had existed as a separate being before, there was no reason Malik’s other half couldn’t, too. Except… Ryou Bakura hadn’t exactly planned for this extra passenger to crawl his way back from the shadows alongside the former spirit. And what “Malik’s other half” – the phrase enough to make said individual gag – definitely hadn’t expected was for such confusion to be tainted by a profound sadness… one that had permeated his entire being for the last six months. Or however long it had been. Malik had gotten what he’d wanted, Ryou had gotten what he wanted, the Thief King had kind of gotten what he wanted – and all that “Malik’s other half” had gotten was a sense of displacement, dysmorphia and disdain. “You know… he’s welcome to stay here, Malik.” “You weren’t conscious during that damned duel fifteen years ago, host. Just be glad you weren’t privy to his cruelty firsthand.” “He’s right, Ryou. You’ve done enough already. There’s no need to put yourself in more danger.” “But there’s not much harm he can do now. I mean—" “I can hear you all.” Three pairs of eyes had greeted him when he’d first turned over on a – soft – bed. His hands had been bound, and he’d growled and snarled so much that he’d made Malik and the Thief King back up – but not the white-haired man in-between them. “You probably have lots of questions right now. And…” The blush that formed on the man’s cheeks had sent a – strange – shiver down his spine, warming his bound wrists. “I’m sorry I don’t have many answers.” He had merely hmphed at that, avoiding eye contact with his “main personality” and the thief who’d dared face him. Instead, he focused on the wide eyes of the man who must have been called— “Ryou… it’s no use. We need to send him back before he does some real damage again.” “Snap out of it, landlord. Just look at how he’s staring at you.” But the man – Ryou – had just tilted his head and let loose a very small smile. “What’s your name?”

#yami malik #yami marik #malik ishtar #marik ishtar #thief king bakura #thief king #ryo bakura #ryou bakura #deathshipping #ygo #yugioh #yu-gi-oh #my work #text

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sitp-recs · 1 year

Note

Hello live, it's me :3 the anon who asked about having troubles with a common drarry dynamic. I just wanted to thank you because i didn't expect to feel so seen 😭 or find someone who felt the same way. I didn't get to speak much about it, but YES i also do feel very strongly about emotional imbalance. It's so important to me. Thank you so much for that kind and understanding answer.

This has encouraged me to really look at some of your personal recs knowing they're from someone with similar sentiments. I'm not saying this to put pressure on your personal recs! Please, this is your blog and i can really simply fuck right off, it's so not on you. the same way it's not on authors to write what makes me feel comfortable 🥂. It's just that i think your answer has given me newfound courage to look at some of your tags and faves with gusto~ I know some recs are made specifically for the askers and some works won't be in line with my preferences so I'm still very careful.

ALSO, thank you for reccing me authors!!!! Gosh! DID YOU KNOW THAT I'VE YET TO READ A FIC FROM TACKYTIGER?? Liv u rock.

------

regarding my previous ask, i guess then, do you have lengthy wholesome fics or those that end wholesome-lly 💛🍂☕? Feel free to recommend absolutely anything on that regard hahahha. And please only answer when you feel up to it, I'm good over here 😌 ✌. It's the holiday season, you shouldn't have to do things u don't feel like doing.

In light of our kinship regarding a certain veritaserum scene, i shall call myself, veritaserum anon.

Hi again, anon! I’m so happy you felt seen and validated 🫂 I noticed some comments on that post sharing the sentiment so we’re not as few as you might have thought! I’m very excited to hear your thoughts on those lists but I’d maybe start with the ones below and see if they work for you. Most explore Draco’s redemption arc in ways I personally found satisfying and without belittling any character. I avoided fics that deal with hardcore emotional imbalance (I love the secret identity trope but I didn’t want to take any chances) and tried to include some recent, lesser known fics in case you’ve already read the popular ones. Also - I’m biased af when it comes to my pal @tackytigerfic but imo you should definitely start with Modern Love then make your way through their superb catalogue! Happy readings, and Happy New Year :)

8th Year/War Years:

Like Lightning at Your Fingertips by potterwatch (T, 43k)

The July Tree by @oknowkiss (E, 51k)

Seeker, Chaser, Keeper by VivacissimoVoce (M, 59k)

The Promise of Summer by Omi_Ohmy (M, 66k)

Right Hand Red by @lqtraintracks (E, 73k)

At Your Service by Faith Wood (E, 95k)

Changing Tides by carpemermaid (E, 109k)

Far From the Tree by aideomai (E, 112k)

Eclipse by Mijan (T, 287k)

Post-Hogwarts:

Take a Chance on Me by @mintawasalreadytaken (E, 41k)

Here’s The Pencil, Make it Work by ignatiustrout (M, 49k)

Take the Air by dysonrules (M, 51k)

Meet Me at Midnight by @the-starryknight (T, 57k)

Modern Love by @tackytigerfic (E, 61k)

The Compact by astolat (E, 64k)

A Young Radical's Guide to Love by blamebrampton (T, 66k)

Home Truths by @skeptiquewrites (E, 67k)

Tea and No Sympathy by who_la_hoop (E, 70k)

Timecode by Rasborealis (M, 73k)

Among Ancient Pines by @graymatters (M, 74k)

Balance, Imperfect by @bixgirl1 (E, 91k)

Little Deaths and How to Avoid Them by nerakrose (M, 96k)

Who we are in the shadows by @quicksilvermaid (E, 100k)

The Liars Department by @dorthyanndrarry (T, 104k)

The Paradox of Active Surrender by @korlaena (E, 108k)

Way Down We Go by xiaq (T, 109k)

All Life is Yours to Miss by Saras_Girl (E, 114k)

A Sword Laid Aside by @korlaena (E, 128k)

Any Instrument by @dictacontrion (E, 130k)

By the Grace by lettered (T, 140k)

All Our Secrets Laid Bare by @firethesound (E, 150k)

Foundations verse by Saras_Girl (E, 364k)

Angst with a happy ending:

Vale Sanare by RurouniHime (M, 23k)

Holly and Hawthorn, Thistle and Thyme by bryoneybrynn (T, 31k)

Kept in Cages by @sweet-s0rr0w (E, 77k)

Super Rich Kids by @thusspoketrish (E, 81k)

I Am Not Who I Became by mab_di (E, 93k)

Nor All That Glisters by @sweet-s0rr0w (E, 110k)

Medium Length:

Tidings of Comfort by blamebrampton (G, 10k)

Rebuilding Draco Malfoy by khasael (E, 11k)

How We Throw Our Shadows Down by thistle_verse (T, 14k)

Turn and Face the Strange (time may change me) by @punk-rock-yuppie (T, 16k)

Vortex by @xanthippe74 (T, 20k)

Nice Things by aideomai (M, 22k) - 8th year

Doing the Lambeth Walk by blamebrampton (T, 26k)

Speak (and may the world come undone) by @shealwaysreads (E, 26k)

Slithering by astolat (E, 27k)

The Nobility of Ascent by Lomonaaeren (E, 27k)

Waiting by an Open Door by Femme and noeon (E, 29k)

Faint Indirections by ignatiustrout (T, 29k)

The Consolations of a Summer's Day by blamebrampton (T, 33k)

Open for Repairs by @drarrytrash (M, 35k)

Follow the Water by @xanthippe74 (T, 38k)

In Dreams by @moonflower-rose (E, 38k)

#asks #Veritaserum anon #LOVE that name btw #drarry reclist #wholesome long fics #and some 💅

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ggukiepie · 2 years

Text

as it was

pairing: jungkook x reader

summary: you bump into jungkook days after you find out he has a girlfriend; things don't go so well

tags: bil!couple, college!au, bff!jk, two idiots in love, angst :(, oc is going thru it she's in her emo era, jk is kinda mean idk you be the judge of that, some flashbacks here and there

warnings: none

wc: 1.1k

a/n: well...i'm back LOL been in my feels lately and was listening to deja vu while writing this but the title is after a harry styles song so there's that. this wasn't supposed to be the next installment but i didn't like what i wrote before so here u go !! sorry for being gone for so long hope you like it guys <33 / series masterlist / main masterlist

You watch him hand her coffee. It’s the one from your favorite café. You’re already deep in your feelings, so you make yourself believe it’s the same order he’d always get for you.

“Again, Kook?” you laugh as he hands you your favorite coffee. “This is like, the third time in a week you bought coffee for me.”

He shrugs and smiles that smile you’ve fallen in love with—the one where his teeth are in full display and his dimples appear. “You’re having a busy week. Just wanna help in any way I can.”

You stand on your toes to give him a kiss on the cheek. “Thanks, Kook.”

Jiwoo’s just as tall as Jungkook, so she doesn’t have to tiptoe to kiss him. Not on the cheek. She’s Jungkook’s girlfriend, so she has every right to kiss him on the lips. And she does. And it makes Jungkook smile.

And it makes you want to cry.

But you’re done with crying over him (or so you think), so you turn around and take the long way to get to class. You don’t want to bump into Jungkook or Jiwoo. You don’t think you can face seeing them together, being all cuddled up and in love.

But you do feel bad since you’ve been avoiding Jungkook. He hasn’t done anything wrong and all of a sudden his best friend abandons him. He did try reaching out for a week, and then gave up all together. You just want to be selfish a little while longer, avoid them both and guard what’s left of your heart.

You make it to class and enter the room right as your professor is about to start his lecture. This is the class you share with Jiwoo, and you have a feeling Jungkook’s just dropped her off. At least you didn’t see him. You take your seat at the very back of the room and try to take down notes of the lecture. She’s sitting in the middle of the lecture room, coffee right there in your line of sight.

You try to listen intently, try to engage yourself in the lecture but it’s no use. The stupid cup of coffee is there and you can see there’s a little note in Jungkook’s handwriting.

In the middle of the lecture, you stand up with a sigh and make your way out to get a little bit of fresh air. Just to clear your head, to rearrange your feelings and your heart and make sure you’re all ok again. It shouldn’t even be that deep—your best friend’s dating someone else and that someone else isn’t you. It’s not like you ever confessed your feelings for Jungkook, nor did he do the same to you. So in reality, there was nothing ever going on between the both of you.

But your heart physically aches, so why does it feel like you’ve lost a part of you?

And because the world is cruel and loves to hurt people, you see Jungkook right outside the lecture room. He’s holding one of his favorite jackets, the one you’d always borrow.

He rolls his eyes as soon as you step out. “You really made me wait,” he deadpans. “I have class right now as well!”

You smile at him cheekily and grab the jacket from his hold. “Someone asked a question and it was interesting and I wanted to listen!”

He rolls his eyes at you but you know Jungkook isn’t mad. The moment you texted him to ask if he had a spare jacket he immediately replied that he was on the way to your classroom. You didn’t know it would be cold inside—usually the air conditioning is broken but you suppose today it just decided to work.

“You are such a nerd,” he sighs. “You secretly record every class of yours, __, you won’t miss anything.”

“Whatever!” You stick your tongue out at him and he reaches over to tickle your sides. “Kook!” you laugh and try to break away from him. It’s no use—he’s too strong and tall and you never stood a chance. He grabs your waist to carry you and place you on the other side of the hall, right by the lockers to trap you and tickle you even more.

“Gotta get back to class,” you say in between breaths, trying to tickle him as well.

“Okay, okay,” he finally says. He steps back and smiles at you. “See you after class?”

“Yup.” You kiss his cheek hastily and run back to the room. “See you!” you say over your shoulder.

You’re brought back to reality and try to say something, anything, to get rid of the silence.

Jungkook’s just as shocked as you, feet rooted on the floor and body unmoving.

“Hi,” you finally say, but it comes out hoarse and awkward. Like you aren’t talking to your best friend. Like you’re greeting a stranger.

“Hey, __,” Jungkook says back. He gulps nervously and smiles a little. “How are you?”

“Good,” you say. The standard reply. You hope he can’t tell you’re lying. “What’re you doing here?” you finally ask. But you think you know why.

“Oh…” He looks down at the jacket as if suddenly remembering he brought it with him. “Just, uhm…” He avoids your stare and it confirms your thoughts. You want to laugh at the situation you’re in. Of course. Of course something like this would happen to you.

“Wanted to give this to Jiwoo,” he finally says as he brings the jacket up. You nod and smile, trying to make yourself understand. Trying to make yourself let go. Maybe it wasn’t meant to be at all. Maybe he didn’t feel the same as you did. Maybe it was just friendship after all. Yeah, he’s loving her the same way he loved you before. But maybe it was a different kind of love. Not the kind you want, not the one you’ve been yearning for ever since you realized you’re in love with your best friend.

You read it all wrong, you finally realize. He doesn’t love you like that. It’s the same but it’s also different. The way he loves her—it’s out loud, simple, clear. No confusing thoughts, no what ifs or could be’s. He’s her boyfriend and she’s his girlfriend and that’s that.

You’re his best friend. Was.

And that’s that.

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countrymusiclover · 2 months

Text

2 - Swords and Winterfell

Part 3

The Last Velaryon

Tag list @rise-my-angel @cdragons

It had been almost a week since Chezney and I had traveled to King's Landing. Jaime and I had only simply said a few words and shared silent glances with one another. So nothing really worthwhile in my opinion. Staring at the ceiling above me the sun had already risen and brought light into my chambers. "How am I supposed to act about all this? I didn't have a mother growing up." I mumbled to myself in thought.

Sitting upright on the edge of the bed I run my hands down my face remembering that Chezney's mother had taught me about most things that my mother would have but I still wasn't as confident as she always seemed. "Haelesa!" Hearing three knocks I sighed in relief.

"Chez, finally I have been here bored counting the tiles on the ceiling waiting for you." I sighed in an over dramatic tone flinging the chamber door open revealing my friend.

She quickly pushed the door shut and locked it. "Sorry this place is much more massive than Driftmark. I got lost a few times trying to find your room."

"Then let's go exploring." I responded instantly.

She flopped back on my bed with a confused expression. "Are you serious? Did you forget the part where I said I almost got lost getting here?"

"I've been trapped in a castle surrounded by the ocean my whole life. I don't intend to stay locked up here in a city like this one. I want to go explore and see what else is supposedly out there." Putting one hand on my hip I sent her a half smile.

Chezney didn't waste another moment getting up to her feet. "That settles it then."

"And if my so-called betrothed has a problem with it then he can come find us." I looped my arm through hers and we quickly left the room rushing down the hallway.

I was still wearing the same outfit that I arrived in but I had let my hair loose since the climate was much warmer than I had ever felt. And I would never wear uncomfortable heels unless someone forced it upon me. Chezney and I took a few wrong turns yet we did manage to find a doorway out of the castle. Placing one hand on the brick wall the wind blew my hair in my eyes until I brushed it behind my ear. There was an open fenced yard out in front of us. "Maybe we took another bad turn."

"Nah I don't think so...look swords." Chezney moved past me and picked up one of the blades that was laying on the dirt a few steps away from us.

Shrugging my shoulders I ran over to her taking the handle of the other one she held out for me in my own hands. "Ah you're right. This should be fun since neither of us are probably good at this."

"You're telling me you've never watched Antler train?" She asked me.

"No, have you?" I asked her back and she avoided my gaze meaning she was lying. I gasped, teasing her back. "Oh you have!"

Chezney grips her handle slightly swinging at me. "Shut up!"

"Ah!" I squeaked, raising my blade and heard our metal clash together meaning I blocked her hit. "Hey don't get defensive, it was a genuine question that you brought up."

She shakes her head. "Just because I have watched him train sometimes doesn't mean that I have feelings for him."

"Actually it kind of does mean exactly that, Chez." I smirked, spinning the blade in my hands trying to balance the new weight in each hand to get used to the new feeling.

Gaining a firm grip on the blade I made my first advance on my friend but she was somewhat ready for me. We both ran at each other and swung at the same time hitting the other's blade. We separated them quickly and I swung upward and she went downward hitting my blade again until we heard someone speak up and catch us off guard. "Ladies aren't supposed to be playing with swords from the lessons I was forced to sit through."

"Ser Jaime." Chezney stumbles dropping the sword and doing the best curtsey she could for him.

Yet I kept my fingers wrapped around the blade but lowered the tip of the weapon down into the dirt. My eyes focused on his letting uncomfortable silence fill the air and I didn't bother to address him like a lady should. "Jaime. I'm shocked you came looking for me. From the day I arrived you didn't seem to have much interest in getting to know me."

"Hmm you are right that I am not really concerned with the whole idea of marriage. But here we are since my father was very demanding of the king to release me from my guard title." Jaime moved away from the doorway we had came from reaching me until there was little gap between us.

Lifting my gaze upward he was slightly taller than me but I wouldn't let him know that I was worried about what he would do. "At least we are in agreement on not wanting this arrangement. Come on Chezney, let's keep practicing."

"Oh I don't think that's a good idea." My friend's demeanor completely changed around the oldest lion son.

Whipping my head around to her I scoffed. "Come on, Chez. You don't really think he is going to judge us when we are just having some fun."

"He's the best swordsman in the seven kingdoms, Haelesa." She trailed off.

Snorting out a laugh. "I'll see about that."

"Is that a challenge I'm hearing, Haelesa?" I sucked in a breath hearing Jaime's voice closer than I was expecting when I had put my back to him talking to my friend.

Slowly turning around on my boots, Jaime and I were almost pressed chest to chest now. "I wasn't calling a challenge with you, Lannister."

"That's not what I heard from you, Haelesa." He smirked smugly. "If you're not calling a challenge, let's still just see what you can do."

Jaime moved around me picking up the sword that my friend had dropped. Chezney parts her lips in shock watching me before I gasped, not sure I heard him correctly. "You're joking."

"Actually I'm not in the slightest. If you want jokes you should meet my little brother Tyrion." He responded holding the blade in his right hand.

Blinking a couple times I still remain where I was originally. "I'm not going to fight you, Jaime."

"As you said it's just for fun and I'll take it easy on you if you truly want to learn how to wield a blade." The Lannister lion smiled at me.

Chezney moved off to the side and nudged her head in the direction of Jaime telling me to go. Sucking in a breath I finally caved in wrapping my fingers around the blade a little tighter than a minute ago. "Okay I suppose we can practice a little." Stepping forward I take the first swing towards him thinking that this might not be as bad.

Yet Jaime only let me have confidence for a brief period of time where he swung at me and I ducked, dropping to my knees. Our swords hit one another but he pushed me into the dust. "Relax your dominant arm. If you use the same move all the time your opponent can learn which arm is the weakest."

I raise my sword trying to strike him but he lightly elbows me in my side to strike me from below. "So why did you really come out here for -uh!" I grunted out, pressing my sword against his. He pressed his sword against mine, never losing gaze with mine. His green eyes holding love with his face remaining the serious one he uses in battle. We never break the hold on each other as he finally answers my earlier question.

"The king has informed me that we are to ride North. He claims to be wanting to make Eddard Stark his new Hand of the King." He lowers his blade and takes a few steps backwards away from me.

Lowering my blade I tilted my head to the side. "Why would we need to ride North?"

"It's a command by the King, Lady Velaryon. You don't go against the royal family unless you wish to lose your head." He told me to slide the sword in the holder on his hip.

Chezney came over to my side where I slid the blade in the belt that was attached to the tunic I was wearing. "I suppose you're right."

"I'd suggest you ladies dress warmly." He responded.

Chezney looped her arm through mine once more about to leave. "Thanks for the advice, Ser."

"I assume that you'll be riding a horse with the men, Haelesa and not in the carriage." Yet he spoke up one more time, having us halt in our tracks one more time. Sending him a head nod I glanced over my shoulder and then Chezney and I went to pack some things for the second trip.

It took many long days ahead that I did spend in the carriage with the queen and her children until the guards had informed us we were near Winterfell. The next time we stopped Chezney followed me and Jaime on horseback not caring what looks his sister had given us for not acting like proper ladies. The wind ran through my hair and my nose ran a little stuffed up from the new sense of cold that surrounded us. Glancing out in front of me I came into a view of a large castle in front of us that had some torches burning around its entrance clearly to keep some warmth there. The royal family enters through the gate and I turned my gaze hearing King Robert struggle to get off his horde from how fat his stomach appears to be as he stops in front of the man I assumed was Lord of Winterfell. "Your Grace."

Robert eyed the man in front of him. "You've got fat....Cat!" The two men laughed before he embraced both him and his wife with red hair.

She greeted him once they broke the hug. "Your Grace."

"Nine years. Why haven't I seen you, Ned? Where the hell have you been?" Robert asked the man Ned who was clearly his friend.

"Guarding the North for you, Your Grace. Winterfell is yours." The queen and her other children descend from the coach as the lord of Winterfell responds.

Chezney got assistance climbing down off her horse and I was about to do the same until I heard a young girl's voice. "Where's the Imp?"

"Will you shut up?" The girl that was older with hair that looked like her mother's snapped back.

Shaking my head I couldn't help but watch the whole scene before me. The king began going down the line first stopping at the oldest boy who appeared to have dark curly auburn hair and the same eyes of his mother. "Who have we here? You must be Robb." He shook hands with the king and then glanced my way making me look the opposite direction.

Next the king went to the two girls. The one all dressed properly like her mother smiled. "My, you're a pretty one...Your name is?"

"Arya.' Said the young girl who looked to be rather uncomfortable in the dress she wore and honestly I could relate with her.

The king went to one of the young Stark boys who showed his muscle to him. "Ooh. Show us your muscles. You'll be a soldier."

"That's Jaime Lannister. The queen's twin brother." Whipping my head back around at Jaime he removed his helmet tossing around the blonde hair and dismounted his horse.

The oldest Stark girl grumbled to her sister once more with the queen approaching the family. "Would you please shut up."

The king spoke to Eddard. "Take me to your crypt. I want to pay my respects."

The queen sighed clearly tired. "We've been riding for a month, my love. Surely the dead can wait." But the king led Ned off and ignored her sentence altogether.

Arya looks around before everyone starts breaking off in different directions. "Where's the Imp?"

Jaime had left after talking with Cersei leaving me and Chezney on our own. Running my hands over my horse he made a quiet nose where I attempted to get off the horse without any help. Yet my boot got caught in one of the foot straps where I screamed gripping the saddle thinking that I'm gonna hit the dirt. "Agh!...huh." I felt strong arms that couldn't belong to my best friend hold me up when my boot fell from the strap and my body was pressed against the front of whoever it was.

"It's a good thing my mother sent me over here to help you otherwise you would have had a nasty fall, my lady." I recognized the voice of the young Robb Stark who helps me to my feet and doesn't remove his hands until I'm stable on the ground.

Turning around to face the Northern boy I smiled getting a better look at him. His eyes were bright and I could see the curls better now. To my surprise I found him more attractive then Jaime which I could only assume was because Robb was near my age of seven and ten. "Thank you for catching me, my lord. I must sadly admit this is my first time on a horse."

"It's quite alright you'll get used to it in time. And please my father is Lord of Winterfell so I'd ask you'd just call me Robb, my lady." He suggested staring down at me but he wasn't nearly as tall as Jaime was.

Shaking my head, I corrected the wolf boy. "I'd prefer if you'd call me Haelesa, Robb. We're not in fancy lessons at the moment." Running a hand down my tunic I changed into some thicker pants and stole one of the Lannister red cloaks over my shoulders for warmth. Chezney was wearing a simple ocean blue dress, some brown winter boots, and a yellow fur cloak and her brown hair put up in a messy bun.

"It's nice to meet you, Haelesa." He greeted me with a cheeky smile.

Chezney came over to us and extended her hand to him in excitement. "Hi Robb, I'm Chezney. Her best friend and lady in waiting."

"It's nice to meet you both." Robb shook her hand firmly gesturing his head back in the direction of the castle offering me his arm. I looped my arm through his and Chezney followed him on his other side. "Come, I'll personally show you Winterfell." I sent him a smile, already feeling better about being around the young wolf than the oldest lion.

Comments really appreciated ❤️

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bokettochild · 11 months

Note

i completely understand the whole argument about wanting a community and a place to feel where you belong but a big problem that many people had with the discord server was that is was advertised in the main "linked universe" tag. because of that, every queer person who was looking at that tag would have seen a post calling them predatory. again, i understand wanting to have your own space, but if you really don't like a group of people and you come into their main space and tell them that you don't like them, they are allowed to have a bad reaction.

Well dang! Why didn't people lead with that?

Yeah, it's one thing to have your own space, it's another to make a shared space feel unsafe, no matter who's doing it.

I feel like suggesting they not use the fandom tags has already been done though, huh?

Maybe (hey, Christian folks, this one IS for you) it would be best to have our own space? Like... a place were we can be free, but not harm. A Discord server might work better than having a small community within a larger one here on tumblr.

While I respect the freedom all people have to speech, I do understand that no one wants to be in their fandom space and find content that paints them as a monster. As someone who sees Christians displayed as such in a lot of modern media, I do in fact speak from experience (yes I have a specific show in mind here).

While being targeted and pushed out of the fandom is not fair or right, making the fandom space feel toxic isn't either, no matter who is doing it.

Feel free to keep being you! Please, yes, be a Christian! But don't be out here treating others like scum, because that hurts everyone: the people you're talking about, the people like me who aren't involved but have to handle the lashback and hate for something we didn't do, and of course those who said/did it to begin with. It does nobody any good to stand in the center of town and say unkind things, which is basically what I'm hearing has been happening. Maybe, if you want to share your thoughts, share them with people who want to hear, not in public places where they will hurt and damage?

I know how it feels to be the one getting trash talked; I got targeted back in 2020 for saying I wouldn't write gay ships, and I had.... a really tough time handling the lashback. Like, I had to quit my job, the stress was so bad! Don't do that to people!

To EVERYONE: If you want a space, by all means, go make one and be happy! But don't turn a space for enjoying art and stories into a political war zone, because nobody wants that, and those of us here for the story may end up leaving it to avoid the chaos, thus harming the artist and not just the viewers.

Be respectful guys.

#asks and answers #lgbtq+#christianity #not lu

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gremlin-writes-angst · 6 months

Text

Scraps to a Tank

Ive been working on this AU for a while. I'm very excited to finally post the first chapter. I'd love feed back from anyone, about anything. This is one of my favorite things I've come up with/written, and want to know how I can improve.

I am tagging some of my favorite redacted asmr writers/Tumblr pages because I'd love to have some feedback (if comfortable and have the time) but also I just want to share what I have.

This chapter is a little cheesy, so small warning for that.

1.7 k words

Fandom: Redacted Asmr/Audio

TW/CW: Quinn in other words toxic, controlling, abusive relationship. nothing graphic. This is a Boxing/Fighting Au so there is fighting, i wouldn't consider it graphic, but everyone's different so read with your own discretion.

Let me know if I missed a trigger or spelling mistake.

Please comment and reblog, it lets me know people like my stuff and encourages me to write more!!!!!!

The building was intimidating.

It wasn't tall or fancy like the buildings a couple of blocks down.

It was an average building.

An average gym.

And yet it was still so daunting.

They checked the card for about the sixteenth time.

The sign matched the card.

The dirty, crusty, crumbled-up card.

The card's appearance didn't match its meaning.

This card was their lottery ticket.

“That name doest fit you.”

They turned around, a man, a beast.

He was tall, big, rugged.

The definition of strong.

Standing right in front of them.

“Excuse me?”

“Your fighter name, it doesn't fit you. And honestly neither does this.”

His hand slowly waved around, gesturing to the alley.

“You're better than an alley fighter.”

They couldn't hold back their laugh, short and dry.

Just like Quinn’s.

“You must have mistaken me for someone else. I'm the fighter that lost.”

“I know.”

He steps closer.

Yet distanced.

He was still giving them space.

He respected them.

“And everyone and their mothers knows that fight was rigged. Though I could see it.”

Intrigued, they took a step closer.

“See what?”

“The passion. The strength, the techniques, you are a fighter.”

“I’m not.”

“You have the will to be.”

He stretched his hand out, a business card.

“I can teach you.”

“So this guy approached me today.”

All Quinn did was grunt and roll away from them.

“He says he can teach me how to fight.”

Their excitement was palpable.

“I already did.”

The air tensed as he fought to dampen their excitement.

For once, he failed.

“No, like real fighting, I looked up the name on the card. His dad is Gabriel Shaw, like Gabe Shaw!”

They hadn't felt this hopeful for a long time, and they wished Quinn would share their interest, at least a little, at least for once.

“Gabe Shaw, like the 3 time champi-”

“Two time, I recognized the name, he died before the last fight.”

The air tensed more.

Quinn was good at pushing things to their limit.

Even the air.

They hated it.

It was sicking.

They were sick of it.

Sick of Quinn.

“I think I'm going to take him up on it, he doesn't fight anymore, but from what I saw he’s good, just as good as his dad, and his fighters get pretty far. I could be a real fighter, I could learn real techniqu-”

“I already taught you real shit, and we already win.”

He moved fast and with anger.

Out of the bed he charged at them.

“Quin-”

“We already win. You're getting too cocky. Winning isn't about the fight itself, winning comes from the fuckers that bet, the poor drunk suckers we trick with the fights. That's how we win. You are no fighter, you know that. I’ve shown you that.”

He looked into their eyes, he didn't have to threaten them.

Not with details at least.

They knew it all too well.

That look in his eyes.

The tone in his voice.

It was all he had to do.

And he knew it.

And he loved it.

He smiled, wicked and calm. Like this was normal, they supposed it was.

They didn't want it to be.

Not anymore.

His hand reached for their forearm.

“Let us get to bed now precio-”

They moved.

Just slightly.

Just enough to avoid his touch.

"You don't want to do that, precious."

He was right.

They weren't ready.

They had to be ready.

They will be ready.

"I couldn't take it."

"What?"

The other fighter spoke, they weren't looking at you, their eyes on Quinn.

"Being with him. Dealing with him once a month is too much."

"Yeah. You're the first one to say that."

"Probably because the other fighters want to get in his pants. They just can't resist ‘The Viper’ "

They don't reply.

"Sorry, I thought you knew."

"I do, there's not much I can do."

"I think there is.”

"You don't understand"

"I do."

They look at the chunky heart-shaped ring on their finger.

"You can get out."

Those words drew them in.

Cautiously they expressed their interest.

"He's quite insecure, use it. Take away his control.”

There was a pause.

They looked around again.

Their eyes caught on Quinn.

A decision was being made behind those eyes.

When they made their decision it was clear.

They made eye contact.

Strong eye contact.

And continued.

“You'll have your moment. I promise. Take it or don’t, it’s up to you.”

They turn their back.

" It's a little strange that you never win these staged fights. I think it's about damn time.”

"I hope everyone's bets are placed because the books are closed for Scraps vs Sweetheart!"

The announcer looks at Quinn, and with a quick nod, he starts again.

"Fighters ready?"

Sweetheart has an intense stare as they nod.

Scraps, on the other hand, doesn't hear the announcer the first time.

"Scraps? This fighter isn't even prepared, it's your fault if you took your chances on this underdog."

They snap back.

"I'm ready."

And they were.

"Then…..FIGHT!"

The match starts, as planned.

A couple hits, a swing of the legs and Scraps is knocked to the floor, as planned.

Sweetheart approached, to taunt, as rehearsed.

"Don't take this personally."

That's the only hit they give sweetheart.

Sweetheart's eyes glimmer as they smile.

"I won't. Take your moment."

Scraps grabs their neck, slamming their heads together before flipping them behind. Scraps moves fast as they get up. In the crowd, they see Quinn and his goons moving to the ring.

"Sorry, thank you."

"Don't be, go."

They climb the makeshift fence and run. A huge smile stains their face as they leave the building, rain washes the sweat off their face. They keep running. Not running away from Quinn but towards freedom, towards their future.

They took a deep breath before they opened the gym doors.

It’s bigger than they'd expected.

They'd never been in a professional gym like this.

There were multiple rings, real rings, not the homemade stuff they were used to.

There's no reception desk like a public gym, but luckily David Shaw was the first person they spotted.

He was in a ring with someone.

They walk towards the ring, they can feel the other fighters watching them.

They get to the ring David is in.

Neither he nor the other fight realizes it.

"David?"

The two whip their head to you.

"Get out."

He was calm but still seemed angry.

"I'm Scraps, from the-"

"I know who you are. Now get out!"

They climb out of the ring, and begin their walk to the door, feeling defeated and quite offended they, whisper to themselves.

"Well fuck you mister big shot ."

"I'm not a big shot."

David says from behind.

Scraps freezes up.

"When I said get out I meant the rink."

They stay still.

"Will you turn around?"

David didn't hold back his frustration.

Scraps feels it'd be best to turn around.

"Sorry."

"You shouldn't enter a ring without permission, not here."

"Sorry, I've never been somewhere this professional."

"You don't mean that."

"What?"

"Those sorries. That is not how you feel."

"I am sorry. And how exactly would you know how I feel? You just met me."

David's eyebrows raise as his eyes keep a dull annoyed look.

“To quote you ‘Well fuck you mister big shot’, that's how you feel, Don't act differently, it pisses me off. I hate suck-ups."

Scraps believes him.

"Well, I'm not sorry, only because you don't have to be an ass, you said you recognize me, then you should of figured I wouldn't know these rules."

"I was an ass so I could protect you, get used to it."

Scraps smiles.

David rolled his eyes.

"It’s been about a year."

"Does the offer still stand?"

"Yes."

"Then what's the problem?"

"Nothing."

Silence rests between them.

Scraps isn't patient enough to let it continue.

"So can I start today?"

"We can't just take you in at the last moment, the trainers have others to train.”

"I don't."

A curly-haired blonde yells across the room, near a punching bag, and starts rushing toward the two.

"I'll do it."

David takes a breath so deep it is visible from his chest. Before he let out a sigh.

"No."

"Oh come on David, I'm a great trainer."

"Asher, I know that, but I said no. You are not the right fit. "

"Ohhh you want to train them."

Asher starts walking towards Scraps.

"Lucky bastard."

He whispers, without maliciousness.

"So what do we call you?"

"Well, I've gone by Scraps for a while."

"Scraps? Really?"

He looks them up and down.

"That won't work"

"He's right, I'm not calling you that."

David seconded Asher.

"Well, I don't really have any other ideas."

"Tank!"

Another voice echoes throughout the gym.

Scraps wasn't expecting to recognize anyone other than David, but rushing towards the group was the boxer who gave them the nudge they needed.

Behind said fighter was a guy, seemingly trying to stop the other from coming over. He was failing.

"That would be Sweetheart, they're our newest addition."

Asher kindly tried to keep Scraps updated through all the chaos.

"They know who I am Ash, at least I hope they do, with the concussion they gave me. You've got one thick skull."

Slightly overwhelmed by all the attention, Scraps freezes and doesn't answer.

"But listen, Tank, it's perfect, there like a machine. They gave me a concussion for God's sake, and then, after slamming our heads together, which had to have hurt them too, they flipped me. That mother fucker acted like I weighed nothing. They're a fucking tank."

"How many times have I told you to watch your language."

David made a sound comparable to a growl.

Sweetheart rolled their eyes, then looked over to Scraps, to engage them.

"He's not a fan of my filthy mouth."

"I sure am."

"Milo"

David sounded like he wanted to strangle Milo.

Yet, to Scraps surprise no one was scared.

The group just laughed it off.

It was strange to Scraps.

"Ohhh my god!"

Asher shot his hands out to get everyone's attention.

"If you go by Scraps now, and we change it to Tank it's like, like you're being rebuilt, becoming stronger. Which is fucking sick."

David shakes his head at the profanity. Before turning to Scraps.

"It's up to you, it's your name. You don't have to choose now. "

"I like it. I mean, I love it."

That's all they said, they wanted to say more but didn't want to overshare about their life after five minutes of meeting these people.

"I am a tank. So I'll be Tank."

If you'd rather not be tagged let me know and I'll respect your wishes.

@dominimoonbeam @romirola @ejunkiet

#redacted asmr #redactedverse #fanfic #redacted darlin #redacted angst #redacted sam #redacted audio #redacted quinn #redacted fanfic #redacted david #redacted milo #redacted au #redacted sweetheart #redacted asher #redacted tank #redacted angel #boxing au

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xxsycamore · 2 years

Text

XX 𝐁𝐋𝐎𝐖 𝐌𝐘 𝐁𝐑𝐀𝐈𝐍𝐒 𝐎𝐔𝐓

► SYNOPSIS:

You go to see Napoleon at the police station, entering to the sight of him cleaning his gυn.

Naturally, it arouses your curiosity.

▍police officer!napoleon x afab!reader

▍rating: E (mdni)

▍tags: Gυn Kink; Bad Use of Police Equipment; Alternate Universe - Modern Setting; Deepthroating A GυN; and not just the gυn; deranged smut; Blow Jobs; Come Swallowing; Police Uniforms

▍cw: this fic contains usage of a (non-loaded) gυn for sexual purposes, so make sure to avoid reading if this makes you uncomfortable!

▍wordcount: 2,315

▍masterlist

▍a/n: Have you seen the new card? Well, this was my reaction to it. I decided to stick to what I said! Fuck the police am I right? I'll go hide somewhere now. Enjoy ❤

Entering the police station where your boyfriend works as of recently, you know the smile won't leave your face in the foreseen few minutes. For one, because seeing what his noisy bunch of colleagues are up to is always rising your spirits. The guys love you and you love them too - catching a glimpse of them bickering and pausing to greet you, you feel like you're walking through a rowdy share house rather than a police station.

"Congrats, Hondje. Your man sure is quite something to climb the ranks so fast."

To miss someone as large as Theo, you sure must be distracted - but your dreamy smile is quickly morphing into a pout as he tousles your hair. You raise a hand to smack his away but you give up and opt to just fix the ruffled mess he created. His teasing successfully heats up your cheeks at the mention of your boyfriend.

Napoleon was last to join the unit and is already its leader, in just a few months - today being his first day as one officially. Out of the whole palette of emotions surging in you varying from pride to astonishment, a huge portion of embarrassment is now added in the mix as well. You neglected to consider the unit's reaction - and the following teasing.

"Yeah, you know how he is… I don't even know if he was seriously trying for the position."

"Woah there, little bird." Another colleague of his, Arthur, gives your shoulder a pat - which you really prefer over the flirty arm-around-the-shoulder greeting he usually goes by, and winks at you. "Must be nice to have a girlfriend that strokes your ego even when you're not around, huh? That bastard."

"What- No, I didn't mean-"

Before you can defend yourself properly, Theo sighs and walks past the two of you and straight towards the exit, but not without glaring at Arthur.

"Stop talking shit and go clock in already. I'm out."

Arthur is successfully distracted, hands on his hips as he watches Theo's departure and yells an un-heartfelt goodbye at him while he's still in hearing range. Theo just waves behind his back, more at you than anything, and then he's gone. It's Arthur's turn to sigh now, maintaining the posture, and you can't help but think that they're just a liiitle bit alike in some aspects.

"He has the nights off this whole week, and for what? It should be saved for those of us who actually have a social life."

You find it humorous that Arthur laments the loss of another night spent surrounded by girls in a bar, critiquing Theo while actually, as you can recall, the two of them hit those bars together most of the time.

"Ah but not ALL of us have to be lonely." The mischievous glint in his deep blue eyes is unmistakable as he looks at you before you can try to verbalize some kind of sympathy, thus saving you from the white lie - but probably not for good. "Boss is waiting for you upstairs. In his new office."

Now, there are several important bullet points here to be structured, like what he called him, or the reminder that you'd have to change your usual route to the unfamiliar door instead, but the most exclamation marks stand after the statement that he's waiting for you. Well, yeah, it is the end of his shift and you didn't come here without shooting him a text beforehand, but you're a little too used to seeing him busying himself around the station instead, making himself useful to his best extent. You'll have to wait until after you bid Arthur goodbye to give your cheeks a well-needed little grounding pat each, so you hurry up with getting there.

"Uh-huh. Thanks for letting me know, Arthur. I better not keep him waiting."

***

"Knock knock." You announce your presence, seeing that the office door is wide open - but decide not to keep it that way, closing it from the inside once you step in. You don't want any nosy colleagues peeking in while you give your boyfriend a greeting kiss. Which you leap at him for, right away.

"Hey." He smirks, collecting you in his arms as he's half-seated at the edge of his desk. Inhaling the scent of his cologne that still sticks as strongly to his clothes as it does when he leaves in the morning, your eyelids close to take it better in. It's only when you open them again that you notice what exactly he put to the side earlier in order to give you a hug.

It's the base of his gυn, now set down next to its other parts as it's been taken apart. You faintly remember Napoleon performing a field strip in front of you in one of his early days at the station, and you know that it's done to facilitate cleaning. Which by all looks seems like what you interrupted right now.

Seeing where you attention escaped to, Napoleon lifts your chin with a single finger and nudges it his way, capturing your lips for a kiss. You nearly melt into it and are surprised that he's first to withdraw.

"I was just getting finished here." He maneuvers you to sit on his left thigh as he sits more steadily at the edge of the desk. You're left with no choice but to put your hands around his neck like a koala since he needs his two free to put the gυn together. You don't mind at all, it's a first class seat for the demonstration taking place in front of you.

You watch with avid interest as he picks up the small rag to clean a spot he missed on one of the dismantled parts, his eyes sharpening as he puts attention to the smallest of details with utter concentration.

"Now you go like this…" He begins the assembling, putting the barrel back into place, moving on to the next part and the next until they're all on their places, the process accompanied by occasional guiding words.

He chuckles, producing his trademark snrk noise as he usually does when you give him that sparkly enthusiasm-loaded gaze. He finds it amusing that something that’s an ordinary task for him can capture your interest like that.

"You that impressed, nunuche?"

You crinkle your nose at him in frown which just makes you more kissable in his eyes. He gives your lips a quick peck, gυn still in his hands just underneath your faces.

You lean in for a peck next, and just to play with him and take your revenge for being bullied, you duck and kiss the gυn instead of him.

He knits his brows in offence that is more a jest that anything, but he is interested in the game. He lifts the thoroughly cleaned gυn closer to your mouth and rubs your lips softly with the muzzle, with the intention to nudge your lower lip open so he can go for another kiss, just a small act of tease.

You only get bolder, your lips gaping indeed, but you lean in to wrap them around the tip of the gυn.

Napoleon's facial muscles freeze for a second, his eyes darkening. You can feel the leg you're seated on twitch, and you doubt that it's simply because of it going numb under your weight or something. It only prompts you to readjust your position, grinding your bottom on him under the pretext of getting steadier on top of him.

You forget that it's Napoleon who is in the control of the situation and it's his hand that is holding the object in your mouth.

"You're playing dirty." It's all he says, devoid of the usual smirk that would reach his eyes otherwise - now his demeanor is stoic and his movements calculated. He presses the metal object further inside your mouth, making you change the position of your tongue so you can take it in.

Your eyes widen in alert but you don't move an inch, doing everything to let him known non-verbally that you want this to happen. Thrill sends you heart leaping like crazy. You don't want to be the wiser one and put an end to the dangerous liaison first. And why should it be ended? The gυn is freshly cleaned, not loaded and most importantly in the hands of the one person you trust with your life.

Napoleon lets out a protruded breather, pushing himself away from the desk gradually and thus making you slide downwards with the movement. Your knees meet the floor.

He holds the gυn in front of his crouch, glistening with saliva and ready to be welcomed back in the warm cave of your mouth. You eagerly wrap your lips anew around it. From the position you’re in, to the hard object in your mouth, to your nose pressed up in his uniform trousers, it all reminds you well enough of sucking him off, but the twisted scenario adds to the inferno inside of you. A moan slips from the depth of your throat, and Napoleon presses the object forward.

Thankfully your gag reflex rests unbothered from the thrust, making your head spin with wanton unmarred by caution. You want nothing but for him to deepthroat you with the gυn, and you demonstrate your willingness by closing your eyes. Feeling the familiar itch of desire, your lithe fingers find it easy to rub some stimulation between your legs in your current position, but Napoleon is not so drunk on lust not to notice.

"Hands behind your back."

His tone is stern and you obey on the spot, holding with one hand the wrist of your other in a secure lock. It's then when Napoleon thrusts the gυn inwards again, nearly hitting the back of your throat.

The noises your mouth emits are now more reminiscent of the more heated sessions of oral you'd perform on him, and even in those, Napoleon rarely deepthroats you. The metal object in your mouth is surprisingly well suited for the task, being shorter and thinner than Napoleon's cock that you're so familiar with. He finds the right tempo, holding your hair in one hand and fucking your mouth with the gυn in the other, aquamarine eyes never leaving the sight of it. It's like he wants to burn this into his memory; a scene so filthy it's almost pornographic, borderline taboo - one that would undoubtedly play in his imagination next time he has his fist wrapped around his length.

You begin to drool from the corners of your mouth, the gυn thoroughly coated in your saliva. You begin to rock back and forth softly, your pussy weeping for the absence of something to lodge deep inside in a similar fashion to the attention your mouth receives.

Just as you begin to get lost in the steady rhythm of his thrusts, your toy is taken away from you. The sound of the uniform trousers' zipper pulled undone enters your ears and a new gush of arouse moves throughout your body, almost by instinct alone.

In a flash, Napoleon swaps the gυn with his cock. His breathing is already rigid, being fairly worked up from doing this to you. Now that he claims your mouth with what he knows for a fact is your favorite toy, he can't help but be selfish.

You take the initiative, moaning and groaning around his length at first, coating it in your saliva to lubricate it for what is coming. Of course, that piece of metal can't be more deserving of your best services more than his cock is, and you want to prove it to him.

Napoleon gets you so well, even without words. He waits for you to take it promptly deep in your mouth, and resumes his thrusts - this time not with his hand, but with his hips.

Your hands fail to maintain the previous order and fall from behind your back in the favor of giving you a better balance. You put them on his legs instead, clutching the fabric, crawling further up until you can claw at his rear.

Napoleon whispers to you words of praise; of lustful accusation of how much you turn him on in the worst of places, of how you make him lose control. He warns you of his upcoming peak, and you swallow around his length in expectation, urging him on.

His deft fingers bury themselves in your hair without pulling to the point of pain as a groan escapes his throat. His hips buckle forward and the first stream of cum hits the back of your throat, making you unable to stay still. He wants to withdraw and give you room to breathe but you stubbornly keep most of his length inside your mouth, letting it all splash on your tongue. You suck him until he can't give you any more of his hot cum, and then some.

"You absolute vixen." He racks his fingers through his bangs once he's made sure you're fine and helped back on your feet, even with difficulty. He can't resist to kiss you, and you in turn can't resist to chuckle against his mouth, cutting it too short.

"I was gonna say, congrats on the new office, boss."

His breath hits your cheek as he huffs, slammed by your wits.

"I'm merely putting things to good use as expected of me." He snaps back, this time clamming the kiss that you denied him before you can shy out of it from the way he worded that. He'll ask more about the way you addressed him later. Now all he has in his mind is you in the red dress he bought, seated opposite him as he dines and wines you, celebrating the promotion. That's it, unless his well-thought girlfriend has another plan in mind.

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