#imma be honest. it still looks like shit and i dont know what to do

[vladimpale]

I'll keep my eyes closed with you like this.

[snekdood]

people will be so terminally jealous of you that they’d rather you reexperience your trauma but somehow in a worse way than just let you live your regular happy life as it has been

[writing-blog-iguess]

Online Matchup

Summery: Y/n thought it would be fun signing up on dating sites, just for shits and giggles. Who knew that was one of the best decisions they made, especially when they're having too much fun talking to a certain Jason Todd.

warning: swearing, unedited I think, mentions of cancer, fluff, lots of back and forth teasing

word count: 3072

a/n: I promised myself I'd post a fic today, though it's not the one I wanted, I hope you enjoy regardless.

ao3

Series master list

Inspired by this:

September 19

You matched with Jason Todd, say hello!

Y/N So, when you say you're looking for a partner in crime Do you mean, like, rob a bank and fight batman? Or like, cozy up on the couch with the fireplace going while it's raining while we try to finish the books we bought? Cuz, I can do the second one I dont think i could fight batman or any of his kids Or even what to, you know? They’re kind of scary …. well maybe one of them i would fight I say fight but its wont be Oh man, I am so sorry about this. This is not how i wanted to tell you that i am a rambler I’m just gonna see myself out Goodday

Jason Ngl this made me laugh So who would you fight but not really?

Y/N You can’t honestly be interested in who I would fight? No way

Jason Way you seemed interesting and i want to get to know you

Y/N … okay but you need to answer my question first

Jason: Lol fair. And it would be the second one. I too wouldn’t fight batman but for different reasons

Y/N: So you're a fighter?

Jason Nope This isn’t how it works

y/n: Fine but remember, you asked for this

Jason: Okay but it’s not like you have a plan on fighting all the batmans kids so i think im safe

y/n: …….

Jason: Oh shit you do?!

y/n: I plead the fifth

Jason: You just got a little more interesting

y/n: I’m going home

Jason: Damn and here i thought i’d finally found the love of my life

y/n: No, nope Don’t say that The more you talk to me, you’ll find the real me and then want nothing to do with me

Jason: Let me be the judge of that We matched for a reason and i want to find out Don’t you?

Y/n: Aren’t you a charmer Okay fine. 20 questions?

Jason: Sure but after you tell what you would do in a fight with the batfam

y/n: I was hoping you would drop this, damn Alright, you get the honour of telling me who you want to know 

Jason: Nightwing

Y/N: Really? Okay. well first i was thinking of just flirting my way out, but he looks like he’d flirt back and i’m not the best at it to begin with, so I’d just get all flustered Bro’s an acrobat, i aint running from him. I aint running from all of them if i’m being honest. Nah for nightwing, he strikes me as a dork in some way. I’ll talk my way out of it. And if there’s something i’m good at, it’s talking.

Jason: So your plan is to talk circles around him?

Y/N: Yes Once i figure out what type of dork he is, imma talk until he gets confused and then i’ll run away Bro won’t see it coming

Jason: I should tell my brother He’s a huge nightwing fan

y/n: Nooooooooooo No one needs to know i don’t need other people to know how weird i am Especially your family I don't want my first meeting to be ‘hey, you’re that chick that’ll talk nightwing to confusion. Man that was a great laugh’

Jason: You think this will go that far?

Y/N: Honestly? No But i have hope You?

Jason: Ya Anyways, red robin?

Y/N: You skipped red hood

Jason: Saving him for last

Y/N: Fair Hes smart, can’t really talk myself out of that one nor would I flirt He is too young and not my type So i use his weakness

Jason: There’s no way you know that

Y/N: No but I know the dude doesn’t have a regular sleep schedule.

Jason: How do you know that?

Y/N: Back when I worked at a coffee shop, I took his order a few times and watched him down his coffee while it was still hot I asked him once, why? Dude said, and i kid you not ‘sleep is for the week and coffee is god’ Ngl, i laughed and gave him a free coffee just for making my day

Jason: Shit day?

Y/N: Ugh you had no idea. I had two tests that day and a term paper due but i couldn’t get it printed in time so that was late Didn’t help i woke up on the couch, and my body didn’t like that

Jason: You in school?

Y/n: Ya, only two years in but i want it to end

Jason: Not a fan?

Y/N: Eh When did we start playing 20 questions?

Jason: Right, we we suppose to play after you finished your hypotheticals

Y/N: Curses Me and my big mouth Who’s next?

Jason: We’re still on RR

Y/N: Blah right I’ll just bride him with coffee and make a run for it

Jason: The fact that that could actually work is scary Are you sure you’re not a villain?

Y/N: Nope just an engineering student who could fight god with enough coffee and no sleep Honestly, RR’s my spirit animal

Jason: Robin

Y/N: Are you nuts? I’d turn myself in and then some ain’t no way i’m coming up with a plan for him He scares me

Jason: Why?

Y/N: I watched him fight a few times The dude has enough skill and rage to fight the justice league if need be I bet he could kill too He looks like it

Jason: Okay you're not wrong But if you had to come up with a plan, what would it be?

Y/N: Cannot believe you’re making me do this Fine Little dude may have a hard exterior, but years of reading and knowing people like him, he has a soft spot and use that against him

Jason: Do you know what that is?

Y/N: … I am going to die If robin finds this, I am dying by either embarrassment or by his hands

Jason: Come on, you gotta tell me I’m at the edge of my seat here

Y/N: Fine, but if i’m going down I’m taking you with me

Jason: But we’ve only just met

Y/N: Maybe so, but I actually like you But i’m starting to doubt

Jason: Aw come on, little bird

Y/N: Damnit I happened to be walking home and watched him sit in an alley playing with cats Must have been a slow night, he was there for hours

Jason: It was the little bird wasn’t it?

Y/N: So who’s next? Spoiler? Batgirl? The signal? Red hood? Oracle? Well, I wouldn’t fight Oracle, I don’t know who they are but I know they would win so I’m going to stay clear of them No, you know what? I can tell you my answer for all three of them I’d bribe them with cookies or something. Idk if they would take it but that’s my plan. Just straight up bribery. Who could resist cookies?

Jason: That’s your answer to everything huh?

Y/n: Yup

Jason: Even with RH?

Y/n: … He’s different

Jason: How so?

Y/N: Mm, okay but your not allowed to judge Or laugh

Jason: Should I be scared?

Y/N: Depends Anyways, i have a crush on him So I would shoot my shot and if i get turned down then at least I tried

Jason: You have a crush on Red Hood? Out of everyone there is, why him?

Y/N: You’re judging! You said you wouldn’t

Jason: I didn’t say shit Now tell me why him?

Y/N: Hell if I know But have you seen him?

Jason: I have but you don’t even see his face

Y/N: That just adds to the mystic that is Red Hood I just know he’s got a good looking face underneath the mask

Jason: You really are something else

Y/N: Sorry I’m a big fan of RH And I guess I like the thought of a mystery So if you want to end this now, I understand

Jason: Who said anything about ending this?

Y/N: Don’t know, a lot of people who seem interested in me kind of leave after they find out Either they don’t want to compete with a crush that I know have zero chance at or they just don’t like red hood and being with a fan isn’t something they want

Jason: They’re stupid I ain’t leaving for that And who knows, maybe you can shoot your shot one day

Y/N: HA That’s not going to happen I freeze up when I’m near someone I like I’d probably stutter and say something embarrassing and run away No thank you

Jason: Thought it out huh

Y/N: You have no idea Anyways, 20 questions?

Jason: I did promise You can ask a couple?

Y/N: Favourite colour?

Jason: Really? After what I did to you, your going to ask something simple

Y/N: Answer the question Jason

Jason: Green

Y/N: Thank you Favourite food?

Jason: What’s with the easy questions? Give me some hard hitting personal ones

Y/N: I will in time Now, answers please

Jason: Chili dogs

Y/N: Those things are gross

Jason: Hey, they are the pinnacle of street food You just have to find the right places

Y/N: Mmkay, if you say so

Jason: Alright, gonna have to take you to one of my favourite places

Y/N: That right?

Jason: Only way to convince you Where do you go to school?

Y/N: Looking forward to it Gotham University, you?

Jason: Not yet, but trying to Kind of hard when you were declared dead for a while

Y/N: Fucking what?! Gonna need that story

Jason: Nope, gotta reach at least level 10 in friendship to unlock it

YN: Damnit

Jason: Sorry little bird

Y/N: You didn’t need to say it so casually tho Who just mentions, ‘yeah i’ve been declared dead but haven’t done anything’ into a conversation And not elaborate on it This is bullshit, sir

Jason: It has happened to people

Y/N: Yeah, but they tell people why You just Dropped a bomb like that and say, not yet Whatever, i’ll drop it

Jason: You sure? Sounds like it’ll bother you until you get the story

Y/N: Yes I’m sure Yes it will bother me But like I said, I like you and I don’t want to be pushy I’m not a pushy person

Jason: Awe does someone have a wittle crush

Y/N: No You got nothing on RH

Jason: Now that just hurts, little bird

Y/N: Don’t you have a question you need to ask?

Jason: Are you flustered? I feel like you’re flustered

Y/N: Amazing weather we’re having Despite the rain and all

Jason: Alright, I’ll stop with the teasing For now Born in Gotham?

Y/N: No I am from Metropolis, moved here for school

Jason: Any other reason?

Y/N: Yeah, Superman kept destroying my apartment building I’ve moved three times and somehow, he always finds the building I’m living in Minute I graduated high school, I moved

Jason: But why Gotham?

Y/N: Gotham intrigues me

Jason: You’re so weird

Y/N: Thank you Since you’re not in school, what do you do?

Jason: Mechanic Didn’t really want my dad’s help so I’m finding my way in life

Y/N: Not a great relationship?

Jason: You can say that So, engineering huh?

Y/N: Yup I love building and taking things apart Have since I was little

Jason: Gonna change the world?

Y/N: Imma try but can’t really do that while working at luthor corp

Jason: Please tell me your joking

Y/N: Ah, not a fan I see Can’t blame you but I am not It was one of the first places I’ve applied to and hear back right away I accepted before getting my other interviews

Jason: jumped the gun a bit 

Y/N: Yeah I did. I wished I didn’t but oh well I’ll find something better if this doesn’t work out

Jason: Why don’t you quit now?

Y/N: I am a broke college student who needs money If I quit now, I’m not sure if I find someone to take me Plus the hours working there are helping my schooling, so it’s kinda late to switch jobs

Jason: Can’t believe I’m saying this but try wanye enterprise I hear they’re good to work for

Y/n: I plan too eventually But at the moment, this is fine The hours I have now works with my school hours

Jason: How’s working there anyways?

Y/N: Not too bad I guess I’m allowed to work on my own projects as long as I work on the assigned ones The people are nice and all but it could be better

Jason: But you don’t like it there?

Y/N: I don’t like Lex Luthor and what he represents I guess

Jason: So you believe that he’s trying to take down superman?

Y/N: I’ve seen one of their fights Nothing to believe

Jason: Must of been some fight

Y/N: Mm So What did you mean, I can’t believe I’m saying this?

Jason: You can’t be weird about it

Y/N: Oh? I am intrigued

Jason: You’re making it weird

Y/N: I am not It’s not like I said you have a crush on Bruce Wayne or something That would have been weird

Jason: Is this how you felt when I teased you?

Y/N: Paybacks a bitch isn’t it?

Jason: I hate you

Y/N: Okay

Jason: I do

Y/N: You’re deflecting

Jason: Oh my god Fine He’s my dad, well adoptive dad

Y/N: Cool

Jason: That’s it? You’re not going to fawn over him being my dad? Ask me questions about what he’s like? Ask if the tabloids are true?

Y/N: Nope Tbh, I don’t care for Bruce Like, I applaud him for what he’s trying to do for Gotham and all But, seeing him on every magazine everywhere I go gets a bit tiring He’s just another dude that people are obsessed with Who cares if he’s rich Besides, I’m talking to you aren’t I? Who cares about Bruce Wayne I wanna know Jason Todd

Jason: You know? I think I may actually be in love 

Y/N: Stooooooop You can’t say things like that

Jason Why? Cuz you get flustered so easily?

Y/N And if I do?

Jason Gotta say it’s my favourite past time

Y/N So, the reason you don’t have a great relationship with Bruce Does it have anything to do with you being dead or something?

Jason Wow WOW I cannot believe you We go from what's your favourites to hard hitting questions huh? I see how it is

Y/N I told you they were coming

Jason I just didn’t think you’d use it as a deflection tactic

Y/N Yeah I want to say sorry But I’m not I’m sure you would use anything to get attention from yourself

Jason Can’t do positive attention

Y/N Eh

Jason I hear you And yes it is part of the reason why me and Bruce are not in good terms

Y/N Mm, I’m sure he’s trying

Jason In his own Bruce way yeah

Y/N Are you?

Jason I like to believe I am Why the interest?

Y/N I don’t know Maybe it’s the fact that my relationship with my dad isn’t the best

Jason You’re dad’s not Bruce Wayne’s too?

Y/N HA Then I would not be talking to you in this fashion

Jason That is true So then what?

Y/N My mom says we are too similar to each other Got the same attitude and all I believe it Growing up, it was all your useless and you’ll amount to nothing Or he’ll ignore me, and I’d prefer that over the degrading Only time he’d show his affection was if he was drunk

Jason Wow Sorry 

Y/N Yeah It’s gotten better since I moved out Now it’s there, and I’m still processing 

Jason Processing what?

Y/N Mm It’s a pretty heavy topic to get into with someone you just met

Jason Can’t be worse than me being dead for months

Y/N Months?! How many?

Jason Oh damn You are a lot easier to talk with then who I normally socialize with

Y/N I shall take that as a complement

Jason As you should And no, I will not be elaborating 

Y/N Alright fair But I will get the story

Jason Mm, I’m sure you will So? Gonna answer my question

Y/N Last year he was diagnosed with cancer Not sure what it is, but it already spread

Jason How long did the doctors give him?

Y/N He didn’t want to know Can’t blame him for 

Jason Sorry about that

Y/N Yeah

Jason You don’t sound to hurt about it

Y/N Like I said, still processing it so I don’t know how to feel With the childhood I had, I don’t know how too But I know when it comes down to it, my emotions will hit me like a truck when the day comes

Jason Well, soak up as much time as you can before you have any regrets

Y/N Trying to He is just making it impossible Whoo boy! That was a lot of emotion for one night I think I’m going to eat some ice cream and binge watch my favourite show

Jason Sounds fun, wish I could join but I promised my brothers with help

Y/N How many do you have?

Jason Do you read anything about the Wayne family?

Y/N Nope What I know about him is what is whispered between my classes and work and even then I don’t listen to them

Jason Really committed on not caring about him, huh Four brothers and three sisters

Y/N Big family

Jason Bruce likes to adopt

Y/N I can tell Anyways, have fun tonight

Jason I’ll try Would you be interested in talking some more?

Y/N I would love to

[blonde-tori-spring555]

as promised, here is one of my tori spring stories

(please tell me what u think, because idek if i like it)

“Charlie, I'm going to the shops soon. Do you need anything?” I yelled from the top of the stairs, “Tori, I know you're going on a date with Michael” Charlie replied from the living room, so calmly it confused me if it was actually a date. It isn't a date. I look at myself in the mirror in my room one last time, it feels strange, I feel…put together. What i mean is i spent at least 30 minutes trying to figure out what to wear, from what i've heard, what i've ‘been through’ to figure out what to wear, is ‘perfectly normal’, first i layed out around four options on what to wear, and when I couldn't decide I asked Charlie, which he responded with “where are you even going” and “i don’t know, why does it matter” so I kicked him out and took all my clothes out in panic, and threw them around the room, then I sat on my floor and cried, then told myself I was being an idiot, did my makeup, and put on some jeans, a white shirt, a black hoodie (which actually fitted me instead of being oversized and/or one of Michael) and some white converse, that I stole off Charlie a couple years ago, to be honest I look the same, but whatever.

I took the bus to the ice skating place Michael went to, he said we could skate together after he's done training, I'm not sure why I said yes, I don't even know how to skate, I haven't since I was a kid. This isn't a date.

I walk inside, he's still training, so I sit in the stands and wait. If this isn't a date, then why am I so nervous? Maybe this is a date, maybe Michael intends it to be a date. Shit this is a date isn't it, no surely not, Michael isn’t my boyfriend, he isn't, so this surely isn't a date.

“Tori!'' I look up and snap out of my thoughts, Michael smiling widely and waving at me from the rink, I smile back, “is that a smile I see Victoria '' he gasps dramatically, I roll my eyes and try not to laugh. I'm blushing. I walk down the stairs and meet with him, and he gleams at me and smiles largely making him look almost insane and cute at the same time, “what?” I ask, “nothing, nothing, you just-” he looks me up and down, not in a sexual way but in a way almost to fully look at me, if that makes sense, “oh my god u looks so cute!” he says in the loudly excitable way, like a child getting a new toy, he quickly takes off his skates and runs up to me and hugs me, almost lifting me off the ground, its probably because of our height difference, he’s alot taller, “i look the same” I reply bluntly, still being held, “yeah, but your… ughhhhh, your so fucking pretty” he nuzzles his face into my neck, gives it a quick kiss, then quickly walks away as if regretting, he opens his mouth to say something, probably to say sorry, but I quickly beat him to it by saying “so we gonna skate now or…?” he looks at me, closes his mouth, half forces a smile “yeah sure” he goes and grabs me some skates, hands them to me and sits down to put his own on, I sit next to him, “just so you know imma be shit at this” he looks and me and laughs softly “I thought so, that's why i’m here to help” I roll my eyes and laugh, he smirks back.

We’re now on the ice, well michael is, i’m standing at the entrance scared to death, “if I die this is all your fault” I glare at him “i’m sure you wont die” he laughs, “i’m fucking serious” I try not to laugh, he holds my hands as I walk onto the ice, to my surprise I dont immediately fall. I force him to hold onto me as we skate, or well he drags me. We laugh and smile and talk and fall, eventually we finish, and we're sore and tired and loki kinda wet, but it was fun. It's still not a date though.

“Are you just going home now or?” he looks at me, he seems understanding, “yeah probably, I told my parents I would be home soon so” i say not looking at him “ok” he nods understandingly “I don't ever really do though” I say still not looking at him, “what?” he asks confused, I realise im not making sense “sorry…ummm, if you don't want me to go now we can just hang around for a bit longer” he looks at me and smiles “if you want” I nod back, i’m blushing, i'm not sure why, he doesn't ask if my parents will be mad, he knows i don't care, anymore at least.

We just sorta sit and talk for a while, after a bit we fall into silence, it's a comfortable silence, it's never really awkward around him, after a minute or so I break it, “don’t you think it's strange that everyone thinks we're dating, just because they saw us kiss once” I look at him, he looks back “their just hopeless romantics'' he replies, “your starting to sound like me” I joke, he laughs back, “that kiss…” I say, we’ve talked about it before, we’ve decided it was a heat of the moment sorta thing, we’ve kissed a few times since. not in that way. He looks at me, for context when I bring it up its the only way my fucking autistic brain can ask for a kiss, he leans in and says “no ones here and no one cares” I put my hands on his face and kiss him, its a normal kiss, not a gross one were u taste eachothers mouths, its just normal, it doesnt last long, but it's long enough.

We part and he rests his forehead on mine, he's looking at me, I keep my eyes closed. I hate eye contact, it makes me wanna die. I finally open my eyes to look at his blue and green ones, he still hasn’t put his glasses back on, his blue eye isn't as bright as my blue eyes, he even jokes that when he doesn't have his glasses on, it's the main thing he can see on my face. For context he's like nearly blind in his blue eye and his eyesight is shit in general. He kisses my forehead. We stayed like that for a bit.

He walks me home, I chose not to take the bus, everytime i’m on one that isn't for school there is usually a random old man eyeing me. I hate men. We get to my house, I don't invite him in, I already know my mum is pissed at me, I'm an hour and 23 minutes late to what time I said I should be home, Michael doesn't need to see her yell, he’ll probably think she's crazy or some shit. I give him a kiss goodbye and walk into my house.

“Your late Victoria” I hear my mum say from the kitchen, she's not even looking at me, Charlie and Ollie both turn and look at me, their playing mario kart, Charlie nods at me then unpaused the game and they both continue to play, “so what were you and michael doing to make you an hour and a half late” my mum raises her eyebrow, my dads head shoots up, oh i'm in for a lovely talk, “victoria this is just unacceptable, the least you could do is call me and say that your going to be late, but here we are, worried sick” my mum guilt trips “yeah but even calling wouldn't of been enough would it” I say, it wasn’t aggressive just pointing out the obvious, “loose that tone” my mum snaps, “what tone” i scoff, “tori, me and your mum think it's inappropriate for you to be hanging out with a boy and coming home exceedingly late and in clothes that are very obviously his” my dad says trying to calm the situation, and for fucks sake that ain't happening, “first of all michael isn’t my boyfriend, second of all your talking about him like he’s in his 30s, and third of all why do you both even think im late” i sorta shout, but its still quiet so Charlie and Ollie can’t hear, “tori your too young to be having…hanky panky” my dad says, oh im in for a treat, in my head i plan to say something like ‘he’s not my boyfriend’ or ‘stop saying hanky panky’ but it comes out more like…”OH YOUR ONE TO FUCKING TALK!” don’t regret it though, if you don't know my parents had me barely a 2 years after they met and got together, my mum finished her english lit course only 2 months before I was born, she had to drop out of a lot but her parents were happy she at least finished the minimum, anyway she had me and my dad was still studying in uni so we went and lived in cambridge where my dad studied, when i was 4 months old my mum got pregnant again, with charlie, he was born like a month early, but so was i, we were both pretty much fine, my dad never wanted to rush into marriage, my mum didn't mind, but i think when you get your girlfriend pregnant twice it's kinda the deal. Ok sorry that just sounds weird. My parents got married when I was 3 and Charlie was 2. My dad looks at me, clearly unsure what to say, my mum is clearly trying not to say something she's gonna regret later, so i just walk away.

I’m not really sure how long it had been since that ‘argument’ but after a bit charlie knocked on my door, i let him in and we cuddled in my bed for a bit, “i heard what you said” he eventually says “did ollie?” i reply, “no, i don't think so” he responds, i nod, “the funny thing is your right” he chuckles, i laugh softly back, “its weird how people look at us and don't realise” i say, “i know right like i was casually talking about it to Sarah and she was in pure shock!” Charlie laughs, Sarah is Nick's mum, she's nice, i like her. We just laugh for a bit and at some point Charlie falls asleep in my arms and I start to drift off too. to be honest it's the best sleep I've had in a long time.

I don't really remember my childhood, it was normal i guess, the funny thing is that majority of the memories i have include charlie, which yeah like he’s my brother, but what i mean is their special, like my main happy memories, charlie and i have been through everything together, like when i got my first period when i was 9 my mum was at some baby appointment since she had just had ollie and i thought i was dying so for some reason instead of going to my dad i went to my little brother, obviously he didn't know what was happening to me so he just held me and cuddled me as i cried, my dad eventually found us and comforted me until my mum came home, and when he came out to us, he had blurted it out one dinner when he was 13 and run to his room before anyone could react, i ran after him and held him and talked to him and told him how proud i was and how much i loved him, and when i was like 6 i decided i wanted to run away, i don't remember why i just did, and my 5 year old little brother asked if he could come with me and so i said yes and we attempted to camp out on our trampoline we had growing up (our grandparents gave it to us or something) and eventually we got to cold and went inside and my parents said we could all stay up and watch a movie but im pretty sure we fell asleep in like 15 minutes. To be honest the list goes on and on, and now that I think about it I realise why people think we’re twins. I know it's total bullshit, but you know what I mean, like for a good 3 or 4 years growing up we were the same height. The thing is charlie will always be mine, he was mine first and biologically we will always be together, i would do anything for him, i would for either of my brothers, i would kill for them no questions asked, i would die for them, i would lie for them and i will always protect them. My parents used to always say that was my job as the older sibling, and it's funny because it’s true, but I could choose not to, but I want to, it's a habit, it's a need. For a long time i always thought i only felt that way about my brothers, that was until michael came into my life and nick really became part of our family, i mean it will always be a different kind of love, but i would still do anything for them. No questions asked.

I eventually actually fall asleep holding Charlie, as if it's a habit, I wake up at what has to be a decent hour for someone who has slept in, (it was around 10:30) I wake up still holding Charlie and ollie curled next to me like a kitten, they're both still asleep, but clearly about to wake up, I just lie there for a while longer, savoring it like it's the last time it will be this way, even if it probably isn't. The boys wake up around 5 minutes after I do. Nick and Michael come over, and we just sit and watch movies all day, and play Mario kart, and laugh until our stomachs hurt. I could get used to this, I love these boys, all in different ways, but yet the same, listen I am aware I probably sound like I'm reminiscing on my deathbed right now, but when you have lived a shit life like me and have seen things a person should never have to see, whether a child or a teenager, or even an adult, you treasure moments like this, my parents are still home, their just doing their own thing, them seem happy, they definitely talked about what I had said, I don't care, if they wanted to punish me they would’ve by now.

Right now high school musical is playing due to Nick and Michael learning ollie has never watched it and they apparently must educate him and their dancing and singing around the room together and me and charlie are sitting on the couch admiring it all. I kiss his cheek and he smiles at me. I love my boys.

But Nick should probably stop encouraging ollie to dance on the coffee table before someone gets told off or hurt.

(Please tell me what u think, I also might change it slightly since it does include things that barley make sense, but I hope u enjoyed x)

[oh-cramity-its-amity]

Oh shit there’s a new one okay. I thought the most recent was liek a week ago. Imma watch that rq

Okay I watched it I’m going feral I’m just gonna yell my opinions in yr inbox rq don’t mind me

Did they actually kill all of the fucking council memebers. They wouldn’t right. There’s no way <in denial. But no literally I will sob if they’re all dead. It looks like Mel is dead from mommy abassarda (🤤) seeking revenge and stuff. Would they kill golden boy and viktor tho? Unlikely. I’m also assuming Caitlyn’s mom is dead for that trauma

“you finally got the name right” I’m going to vomit

I know this is not an original opinion at all but I really hate the outfit 😭. Why does she look like that. What happened to my vi with her good outfits. Maybe it’s supposed to be symbolic that it doesn’t fit her but like

Istg if jinx dies I’m cutting off every riot persons heads

I’m a little mad they’re cutting it off at 2 seasons but it makes sense ig :/ I’m just like my lesbians. Why

YES! omg. i absolutely dont mind at all 😭. i was losing my mind!!! literally just WHAT.

i dont know if they did or not to be honest?? i remember seeing people discuss about them killing the members, and they debated about them killing champions. i dont think jayce is dead?? hes a champion. and if arcane is canon to LoL lore then like he wouldnt be?? not too sure about everyone else but i dont think the champions are dead or will die. cassandra however- i think fandom kinda considered her dead for a good majority of time. i dont know league lore so dont take me seriously 😭. BUT- i dont believe jayce is dead. idfk if viktor is, mel potentially. hmm... IM SURE like someone survived... they wouldnt do that to caitlyn... come on... kill her mom and then her childhood friend...? thats... ykw kinda on brand for the emotional turmoil.. BUT COME ON.

again- dont think they killed any champions but everyone else... yeah... probably rip. :(.

wondering how this is going to affect caitlyn tbh too. how is she going to handle herself. is vi going to comfort her?? uh... WILL WE FINALLY FUCKING GET A KISS?? istg anyway.

I KNOW!! oh mannnnn NO THATS NOT THE WORST PART

the "my sister is gone" had me like wanting to literally go insane because OUCH!!! someone please save vi from this turmoil 😭. shes gonna be put through it and IM not ready.

the red jacket was HER :(. i think its kinda a metaphor too like u mentioned about her not belonging on the team and feeling uncomfortable but then again the LoL players *were* clowning on the discourse of people being upset over vi being a cop. I DO LIKE THE GOGGLES THO. those r sick. but the outfit? girl what did they do to my favorite lesbian. who is she.

dont think jinx is gonna die thoughhhhh.... i mean... why would she... die... they wouldnt... right? ...right??

..right???????

please i just NEED them all to be okay i cant do this!!! /lh but also /srs. i do need them to be okay. IK I SIGNED UP FOR THIS BUT OW.

honestly im a little shocked about it being just 2 seasons too but i think its good just because of how long it took between 1-2. i have maaaad respect for the people working on it. swear as long as we get a physical release of the season season too ill be down. first we had news about s1 getting a physical TO A FUCKING TRAILER... we are eating SO good this week.

short and sweet though. tbh im sure theyll be able to tell what they need to cause 45 min per an ep. doesn't seem that surprising. but still 2 seasons is crazy. AS LONG AS THERES NO CLIFFHANGERS ILL BE FINE.

i justttt need caitvi in s2. i need them to kiss. i am not asking for a lot. need them to kiss and for literally jinx, and several people to NOT die.

anyway whoops. thanks for sending me your thoughts aaaaa

[borathae]

Chapter 25

fuck i dont have time for 10k but lets get this bread lol OH SHIT ITS EXTRA SAD FUCK HOW DO I SQUEEZE SADNESS INTO 20 MINUTES

so he is born between 1210-ish? damn that was one hell of a night ok 1310-ish he left korea for europe (age 100) fuck he was really a gifted healer, trying his best and then all this happens

1500 age 300 he was um not ok fuck thats so sad not remembering anything and just seeing yourself like that WILLIAM?? DAMN

1700 - 500 came back to korea oh he met jimin in this era in russia Taehyung had almost forgotten the language of his home but Jimin refreshed his memories again fuck thats so cute

Taehyung liked that Jimin also drank blood, he had never seen someone else like him before and it made him happy SHIT HE DIDNT KNOW ANOTHER VAMPIRE FOR 500 YEARS OF HIS LIFE??

what he liked most about Jimin was that he helped him not feel anymore. Taehyung still felt joy, annoyance, anger, rage, pleasure. He still felt those things, but he knew they couldn’t hurt him anymore. oh thats nice, to not be hurt by very fucking emotion u get and feel. but idk this feels slightly concerning like did he lose emotions all together or what WAIT IS THAT THE SWITCH IN ONE OF DATES???

he really loved 20th century huh, the art, changes, inventions. thats cute. he is really going to die in this chapter? huh? pls im about to cry

oh 300 years later he is bored. im scared 💀👀😃so tae changed but jimin stayed the same and thats why it looks like vmin is going separate ways hmm but they still care for each other

so tae wanted us as another feed/hunt and joon interrupted that night hmm damn YES ALL THE FAKE PRAISE HE WAS MAKING HER TELL

wow yall call ur man handsome with pure intent so that u can stay safe cuz tae wanted to kill us but then he changed all from a praise

ok im going for a while and imma come back

damn he really was honest in that chapter i didnt expect that lol

*detective aha, YES I KNEW IT WAS THE EMOTION SWITCH now we knoe the histroy, jimin turned it off, it turned on with oc YES BABY U MADE A MAN LIVE AGAIN

ah thats how he was cold again after the chat and thats what jimin meant when he said u turned it on again

damn even he was lying/pretending, he wasnt fuck THATS WHY HE WAS LIKE THAT DAY AND THE BATH

and this is why jimin is asking her to save him, cuz she is turning it on when jimin turns it off. BUT WHY WOULD JAMAL CARE he did all that for centuries and he suddenly cares now?? fuck off aint believing that shit. i aint born yesterday, neither are you

or was jimin under joon's control ever since he introduced him? nah actually, a little before jimin turned off tae's emotion?

anyways im happy i guessed most of tae's lies or at least half yipee

AHA JIMIN IS JOON'S EXPERIMENT AND TAE OF JIMINS

ok so jimin does care hm ok sorry jamal (no trust is better than stolen trust)

JAMAL DONT DIE ON ME WTF MAN I LOVE YOU DONT FUCK NOO BITCH ASS NAMJOON UR GETTING UR ASS WHOPPED BY MY DAD GRANDPA AND MOM

TAEHYUNG AAH I GET YOU JIN AND KOOK BUT PLEASE MY BABIES GOD MY STOMACH HURTS, MY NOSE IS RUNNY, I CAN REALLY PHYSICALLY FEEL MY HEART

sibi i hate you why just why

1500 age 300 he was um not ok fuck thats so sad not remembering anything and just seeing yourself like that WILLIAM?? DAMN

explains why he knows that william shakespear indeed had a male lover 🤪🤪

1700 - 500 came back to korea oh he met jimin in this era in russia Taehyung had almost forgotten the language of his home but Jimin refreshed his memories again fuck thats so cute

no but they were actually so perfect for each other back then 😭

Taehyung liked that Jimin also drank blood, he had never seen someone else like him before and it made him happy SHIT HE DIDNT KNOW ANOTHER VAMPIRE FOR 500 YEARS OF HIS LIFE??

BIG SAD HE IS SO :(

but idk this feels slightly concerning like did he lose emotions all together or what WAIT IS THAT THE SWITCH IN ONE OF DATES???

BINGO 😌😌😌😌

he really loved 20th century huh, the art, changes, inventions. thats cute. he is really going to die in this chapter? huh? pls im about to cry

hahhaha the fear is so valid :--------)

oh 300 years later he is bored. im scared 💀👀😃so tae changed but jimin stayed the same and thats why it looks like vmin is going separate ways hmm but they still care for each other

yes 100% definitely

wow yall call ur man handsome with pure intent so that u can stay safe cuz tae wanted to kill us but then he changed all from a praise

lmaoao he is such a slut for praise fasjdf

damn he really was honest in that chapter i didnt expect that lol

i love just knowing he was actually genuine 😩

*detective aha, YES I KNEW IT WAS THE EMOTION SWITCH now we knoe the histroy, jimin turned it off, it turned on with oc YES BABY U MADE A MAN LIVE AGAIN

YES EXACTLY 👀👀👀👀

ah thats how he was cold again after the chat and thats what jimin meant when he said u turned it on again

yesss exactlyyyy

damn even he was lying/pretending, he wasnt fuck THATS WHY HE WAS LIKE THAT DAY AND THE BATH

YES THISSS

and this is why jimin is asking her to save him, cuz she is turning it on when jimin turns it off. BUT WHY WOULD JAMAL CARE he did all that for centuries and he suddenly cares now?? fuck off aint believing that shit. i aint born yesterday, neither are you

okay but you really have to remember the magic ring fighting off mind control 👀

or was jimin under joon's control ever since he introduced him? nah actually, a little before jimin turned off tae's emotion?

ooooooooooooooh 👀

AHA JIMIN IS JOON'S EXPERIMENT AND TAE OF JIMINS

OOOOOHHHHHHH 👀👀

JAMAL DONT DIE ON ME WTF MAN I LOVE YOU DONT FUCK NOO BITCH ASS NAMJOON UR GETTING UR ASS WHOPPED BY MY DAD GRANDPA AND MOM

:-)

TAEHYUNG AAH I GET YOU JIN AND KOOK BUT PLEASE MY BABIES GOD MY STOMACH HURTS, MY NOSE IS RUNNY, I CAN REALLY PHYSICALLY FEEL MY HEART

:-)

sibi i hate you why just why

:-)

[diviinaee]

TALKING ABOUT THE QUINN TRILOGY OF VIDS WE GOT

obviously spoilers ahead for all 3 vids !!!

i had this post in my drafts to put my love reactions on so that's why the tenses are so fucked up LMFAOOO

tws are the same as all the videos!!

Your Cruel Vampire Ex Got Caught

FIRST OFF SAM N DARLIN TALKIN WILL ALWAYS GIVE ME SUCH HAPPINESS. THEN BEING HAPPY WITH EACH OTHER. THAT IS WHAT MAKES ME HAPPY.

oh davids calling slay

THEY WHAT.

i dont trust this shit for a SECOND BRAH

david speedin lol thas hawt

THE DEPARTMENT IS ON THE LINE ISTG THEY GETTING ON MY NERVES. if at some point we don't overthrow the government imma wore out M Y S E L F.

MR FOX? OMGGGGG (also got accused of being erik by @blutomindpretzel because earlier i mentioned foxes and wolves😝)

Henry sounds like someone who drinks expresso just enough to gain back his social cuts

YEA HENRY FUCK OFF (im so sorry Henry ik your just doing your job)

ok yall got quinn. let darlin kill him now please 😻🙏🏽

HE WHAT.

imma be so honest a part of me said, "LET HER DIE JUST FUCK HIM UP BRAH" intrusive thoughts did not slay as usual

IM SORRY? YOU WANNA BRING UP THE ETHICS OF THIS SHIT NOW? (everyone welcome philosophy student div)

SO THE VERY SYSTEM THAT WILL (W/O CONSENT REMEMBER) ERASE THE MEMORY OF UNEMPOWERED HUMANS TO MAINTAIN COVERT IS SAYING THAT USING THE VERY POWERS THEY ARE GIVEN TO FIND INFORMATION THAT COULD SAVE A LIFE IS UNETHICAL BECAUSE "HE STILL DESERVES RIGHTS"??? DAVID IS RIGHT, HE DOESN'T DESERVE THEM. HE IS A FUCKING HOMICIDAL PSYCHOPATHIC ABUSIVE SADISTIC AND MANIPULATIVE VAMPIRE.

are the rights of a murderer worth more than the life you can save. ISTG THE DEPARTMENT IS SO LUCKY THAT I DON'T EXIST IN THEIR WORLD BC I WOULD FUCKING DESTROY THEM

sigh.

oh shit the video still playing. who he wanna see?

you've gotta be fucking kidding me.

SAM? oh he's gonna mindfuck this shit all up

the CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT OF DARLIN OHMYGOOOD. Early Darlin would've shifted and ran to the department the moment David called. But look at them now. They are calm. Angry, but calm. They encourage Sam to talk because they realize that their want for vengeance is less important than the life they could save.

im FUCKING SCARED

Your Mate Confronts Your Cruel Vampire Ex

Sam's breath before he enters the room im alr sobbing.

HES FUCKING BRITISH

oh my fucking gawd. OH. MY. G O D .

also GBA love that. i love him.

YUHH SAM GETTIN STRAIGHT TO THE POINT

"your manners could use some work" YOUR ENTIRE PERSONALITY COULD USE SOME WORK QUINN

gba is doing such a good job like i genuinely wanna punch my phone

"i wanna get to know you" this ain't A FUCKING DATE HIJO DE SU PUTA MADRE

"i do look rather dashing in blood" lets test that theory. im gonna use a chainsaw, a bat with nails, etc. ALLÍ SI YA VEREMOS QUIEN SE RIA ENTONCES IGNORANTE HIJO DE MIERDA

FRED MENTION IN 2023 LETS FUCKING GOOOOOO

nvm i hate this mention.

FREDRICK COLLINS? IM FUCKING SOBBING.

HOW DOES QUINN KNOW ABOUT SAM'S TURNING-

ALEXIS ISTG.

this girl is either dead or doesn't exist bc quinn just fucking loves talking

i wanna know what coffin you'd like quinn 😻🫶🏽

"humansblah blah blah" mf YOU WERE A HUMAN ONCE YOU STUPID DENSE IDIOT

imma be honest quinn reminds me of my ex and my darlin kinnie is FUCKING SCREAMING AND CRYING

"is her life worth less than your comfort?" ......props that's a good line.......

CAN HE STOP TALKING ABOUT FRED ICAN'T DO THIS BRO

as someone who was refused closure. yea. the worst thing a monster like quinn could do is deny them closure. FUCK. ERIK YOU BRILLIANT BITCH

darlin is dissociating so hard i can feel it

"betryal" THEY RAT YOU OUT FOR BEIN HOMICIDAL AND YOU- i need to calm down before i break this phone cause i JUST got it 2 months ago.....

ouch. erik did you text my ex for this 😝🫶🏽

comfort from the world in pain and suffering GOD.

SLOPPY SECONDS? AHORA SI LO PIDE VOY A MATAR A ESTE PINCHE HIJO DE PUTA

shut up. shut up. shut up. shut up. shut up. shut up. shut up. shut up. shut up. shut up. shut up.

QUINN. OH MY GOD HE KEEPS FUCKING TALKING.

HE WAS STALKING THEM? EWEWEWEWEWEW

"surely they've asked for it by now, knowing them" not gonna lie this activated my ptsd and i had to take a lil quirky crying break 😻🫶🏽

HIM CALLING TOWARDS THE WINDOW BC HE KNOWS DARLIN IS THERE FUCCCCCCKKKKKK I WOULD'VE PUNCHED THAT WINDOW

goddammit erik you brilliant genius.

Quinn's Aftermath

I'm alr crying and i haven't even pressed play brah.

OH THANK GOD THE ADDRESS

F U U C K THE HUG I'M CRYING

DAVID HEARD EVERYTHING? FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK I'M GONNA SOB I CAN'T DO THIS

"i need to get you out of here" I'm sobbing. I'm fucking sobbing. did i mention i was sobbing. cause if not, im sobbing.

CAN I JUST SAY HOW MUCH SWEETHEART IS A FUCKING MVP LIKE THEY INFORMED DAVID FIRST AND IS KEEPING THEM IN THE LOOP I FUCKING LOVE THEM

DAVID AND DARLIN HUG IM SOBBING EVEN HARDER NOW

i can feel the dissociation radiating off of darlin im still crying

"what can i do darlin" pls remove my tear ducts and give me a goddamn lobotomy/j

did i mention I've been sobbing this whole time 😝

"i thought you'd be angrier" that's dissociation for ya.

cold hatred > fiery hatred : you cannot let the rage consume you because if you do, it becomes your whole life and you can bring yourself to a position where you have no chance of moving on in the future

this audio deserves an oscar IDC THIS HELPS SO MANY PARTS OF MYSELF THAT WERE LEFT UNHEALED IM STILL SOBBING

"what he told me doesn't change us" you guessed it. sobbing.

"you are my absolute priority" I'm gonna be so honest. I had to turn off the video. I never knew that was something I needed to hear but DAMN.

HOURS? HE DUMPED THEIR TRAUMA FOR HOURS? OMFG LET ME AT HIM

the way he says that he sees darlin after knowing about their past. As someone who's been through

"What I heard, in all his rambling, was the story of a good, kind person...with an open heart... trusting a man who promised to care about them and him using that trust to hurt them." + everything after that. jesus christ um. I'm gonna rant so if you don't wanna see that skip till i says BALLS 🤪

I've been in this position of close people finding out about my past and I'm gonna be so honest. If I had someone like Sam, I don't think I would've fallen to rock bottom as hard as I did. All a victim wants is for people to understand what they went through and not think less of them. I remember the way I was talked down to and still am due to the person's knowledge of my trauma. Sam saying that he sees a fighter who got up from the amount of trauma, is something that I begged for. It's what Darlin needs. They need to see that although this is a big portion of their life, it does not reflect their person. Erik truly, once again, hit a very sensitive topic right on the bullseye.

BALLS 🤪🫶🏽

THEM BREAKING DOWN STOP IM GONNA BREAK DOWN WITH THEM.

all the listeners think crying and being anything other than happy is stupid and i RELATE

my momma bear is coming out jesus christ. THEM THINKING IT'S HUMILIATING TO LIKE THAT ASPECT? FUCK I'M GONNA SOB

[imma skip to David calling because the rest of sam and darlings talk i was just ugly sobbing]

hold on. "You're my heart darlin." "You deserve so much better than the hands life's dealt you" sobbing even more.

N E W A Y .

I FUCKING KNEW IT THAT GIRL WAS DEAD ISTG THIS IS WHY THE DEPARTMENT IS FUCKING STUPID WHY WOULD QUINN GIVE THEM A CHANCE TO SAVE SOMEONE

HE HAD PICTURES AND VIDEOS??? I'm gonna gag istg THAT SADISTIC FUCK

"he's gone quiet" he'll go quiet when i KILL HIM

fuck. man fuck what anyone says, vega, regulus, blake have nothing on quinn. VEGA YOU COULD'VE FED ON THIS BASTARD AND GOT MORE POWER THAN WHAT YOU GOT FROM IVAN

YES. YES. NO WITNESSES FOR ME TORTURING HIM FUCK YEAAAAAA.

only condition is that they're still is something to kill? I GOTCHUUU

i need William comforting Darlin. And Asher. And Milo. HELL I'LL TAKE CHRISTIAN TOO PLS I NEED MORE COMFORT.

FUCK YEAAA VAMPIRIC LAWS ARE SLAYING

KILL THE BASTARD. LET IT DIE LET IT DIE LET IT SHRIVEL UP AND DIIIIIEEEEEEEE

can't wait to see quinns face when he realizes the fact that darlin is gonna torture him the same way he torture them.

NOW TIME TO WATCH GUY, OLLIE, AND CAELUM BECAUSE HOLY SHIT I NEED IT

[swaggypsyduck]

Yall I’m new to stanning football. I came here straight from the world cup and I’m not gonna lie this shit is beating my ass. Is it always in the mud like this? I chose psg because that seems like the best option because they got messi, neymar, and mbappe who are literally the three players that caught my attention during the tournament! Yall I really thought this was going to be fun. 😭 What’s going on? Why does everything feel so confused and chaotic (not in a good energetic way, more like headless chicken running kind of way) but also weirdly sluggish and slow? Yall I don’t understandddddddd. It’s like the team has four different personalities all at once? It’s so… unpleasing to watch yall it was not like this during the world cup. 😭

I hope they get better. But I’ve been reading the psg girlies on tumble and … it seems like nobody has hope it’s going to get better? I mean surely it will? Right? I feel like everybody has given up on the season and I’m scared. 😭 I hope Kylian feels better soon. I was thinking maybe we can do trades with other teams but apparently business hours is already closed and will next open in the summer? The fuck? But we dont got anyone? And almost everyone is dropping like flies? What happens if the big guy on the fishnet gets a flue or just gets sick in general? We just dont get anyone?

Also the coach looks like he should be in a martin scorsese film with robert de niro and joe pesci. The fuck is he doing on the pitch tho?

We need to bounce back QUICK! We need positive vibes! Energy! We need God to be honest but I feel like I’ve spent all my credit with him praying for Messi to win the world cup. My account with God is all maxed out. Yall. I cant sleep until I figure this shit out. Somebody do something!

Do we have a secret weapon? Like what is the plan here? What is plan b? Oh my goddddd. This parasocial relationship is with these players really do beating my ass. I’m out here worried for them!

hi anon! wow this is a doozy. ill try to break down my response but idk if it'll do ur rant justice LOL

1) Welcome newcomer! as u may have seen in the world cup, if there's one thing someone should tell u before u enter the football world is that ABSOLUTELY NOTHING is guaranteed. you could have the strongest defense, the best goalie, gamemaster midfielders, and strikers w amazing finishes and you'll still lose to an underdog team who has better teamwork and chemistry. or just one player decides "uk what? imma earn my paycheck today" and demolishes the other team.

2) psg is a joke. ill tell u right now. lose any and all expectations. we clown on them bc even if they played shit before but at least they were winning. now they're playing shit and LOSING! and thats the problem we have. the 4 personalities at once thing is absolutely correct. you have 3 well seasoned forwards who are used to being the "it" strikers of their team. on top of that we have NO MIDFIELD AND A SHIT MANAGER WHO CANT GET A TACTIC OUT OF HIS ASS EVEN IF I SHOVED IT IN THERE MYSELF!!!... sorry i lost it a bit there lol.

3) as yes transfer window closing. see that's also Galtier and that fuckin toad incharge of players who DIDN'T MAKE A TRANSFER UNTIL LAST MINUTE AND LET CHELSEA FUCK THEM OVER. and sorry to burst ur bubble but there's a chance key players might leave/retire by that summer so lets hope they promise them to bring in an actual proper midfield by then.

4) So another thing to consider if one of the reasons u chose psg was for messi... i wouldnt. This isn't his club. this is his retirement club. ramos too actually. they've finished their careers. they actually have absolutely nothing to lose LOL. messi's heart will always be in barcelona. as in he literally knows nothing else except barça

5) injuries suck. but they are a part of the game. if u play any contact sport u know the feeling. even non-contcact sports there r still big injuries. everyone is hoping kylian gets better soon. he needs all the rest he can get 🤲🏼.

6) Our secret weapon? BHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! prayers i guess. nah im kidding. but there really isn't any secret weapon unless u count galtier deciding to pick up a tactic book? or leaving and getting replaced by pep or zidane. to use ur weapon analogy we have a dented shield that still works (defense) and a bunch of bullets (forwards) but no gun (midfield) to load them.

7) ik u were joking about that last part but the parasocial relationship?? do ur absolute best to minimize it. like as someone who's been watching the beautiful game since i was a kid its okay and fun to joke about it and worry/send love to ur faves but u have to remember: those are grown ass men getting payed hundreds of millions to kick a ball around while those in their cities that pay to watch them are in heating/housing crisis. so when we eat the rich ill be cutting them up w tears uk?

hope this helped LOL.

[zalrb]

@ the anon who came into zal's asks to address the "lack" of queer media appreciation on her blog. i really hope you read what i'm about to say

i felt a lot of resentment from your ask. i felt the desperate need to be seen and validated. i dont know you or your personal life, idk your baggage. but since the ask was queer related, imma just go out on a limb and assume that so is your pain. i get it. im a lesbian. being queer can be extremely isolating, lonely and painful. there's a reason why the depression, substance abuse and suicide rate is so high in our community. i understand. and i need you to understand that your frustration is unrelated to zal. zal dedicated her blog to fiction, yes. she gives her honest opinion on all types of media. sometimes that's queer media. and sometimes her opinions aren't positive. but that's not because the media is gay. there are a lot of factors that contribute to her feelings towards certain ships and characters. she cares about good writing, execution and chemistry. this isn't news. and i think that's partly why your asks confuse her. it's like youre asking her to make an exception when it comes to queer media, it sounds like you want her to mindlessly praise queer characters and ships, when you already know she's not the type to casually stan anything. and on top of that you want her to focus more on queer media in general, while that's not even her demographic. even if it was, it still wouldn't be fair of you to have these expectations of her. like, im gay and yes, i watch queer media that intrigues me, IF it intrigues me. just because a character or ship is queer, doesn't mean i'm automatically invested. i need more than that. maybe you dont and that's okay. but that doesn't give you the right to imply that zal is homophobic. i get the strong sense that you're ecstatic about all the representation we're finally getting and it saddens you to see that not everyone seems to care as much as you do, and i get it, i get that it can be very frustrating to feel like no one gives a shit, like i said being queer is hard, BUT... anon... youre lashing out on someone who's just minding her own business. its not zal's responsibility to validate the queer community all the time. it's our job as a community to be at peace with ourselves, to feel valid even without constant external approval. we gotta find that within ourselves, not look for it online. zal has never disrespected the queer community, shes clearly an ally but youre using her as punching bag because you generally dont feel seen/validated and it's easier to lash out on a black woman online than it is to look within yourself and your environment and figure out what makes you feel so unseen. i'm sure there are a lot of things that contribute to your pain. again, im just here to remind you that zal has nothing do with it.

Thank you 😌

[i-make-mogai-terms-2]

an argument for xenogenders

imma be honest i took this argument half seriously then i got bored so i might come back to it but dont count on that. i think its a good jumping off point for Something though.

0. foreword

i'm kind of tired rn but i just wanna get this out there. i am not an end-all be-all, i am not a representative or a large member of this community, and i would love it if someone could proofread or add to this or bring up counterarguments because hoo boy my brain ain't running today

note that i will not tolerate people just saying "cringe" or whatever. if you're here, come here with a real argument.

I. an argument for xenogenders

gender is a construct. a construct based off our biology, sure, but still a construct. the idea of gender has changed over time and varies by society. the concepts of gender vary from person to person. what "woman" means to someone might be completely different from what it means to someone else.

gender is presentation. you outwardly convey what you want others to think about you. part of that is gender. gender can be conveyed through appearance, actions, words. the signals are then interpreted by someone else. 

now, then. there are a lot of different positions that anti-xenogender people take, but i don't give a shit because i'm a teenager on the internet with like 3 followers. my point being: why does gender only have to be male or female (or male, female, and both/neither)? why can't we try to convey a gender in abstracts, in "tree", in "blue", in "love"? (it doesn't matter if people interpret it wrong - most people with xenogenders, heck, most non-binary people are prepared for that.) but no one can ever perfectly portray their self, their personhood.

gender is self-expression.

FAQ: "why do you coin new genders that no one will use then" IDFK i'm doing it as a community building exercise and because i like flags

II. an argument against cringe

sometimes people are weird. that's really it. i'm fuckin weird, for more reasons than mogai bullshit.

i don't know why the fuck you'd want to hang out with people who don't like you because they don't like people who share the same label word as you. like, who fucking cares about a "cringe" vocal minority? 

and politics. why would people be prepared to take away transgender rights because of a few "bad apples"? it's 'cause they were fucking looking for a reason to take away transgender rights. the people who take away your human rights are never the people you should be sucking up to.

...i'm sorry if being seen as cringe is a new thing to you. i really am. i get the social alienation that comes with being seen as weird. but to truly be yourself, you have to accept that sometimes, people won't like you, because no one likes everyone.

III. an argument for transsexuality

my argument isn't really about dysphoria, lol. (can u tell my brains running out.) i dont rlly see dysphoria as a part of gender expression, which i'm trying to argue xenogenders are. dysphoria is a thing related to but not entirely made of gender expression... i dont rlly know what causes it, i dont know the brain mechanisms behind it, yadda yadda

feel free to copy-paste & alter this post and use it wherever... just don't paywall it, information is free <3

[dear-tumby]

just got out of a manic episode lol

yeah so im depressed now, no longer depresion haha funnys more like depresion no hahas and im pretty sure im scaring off my boyfriend so yeah, he stopped talking/hanging out with me when i was being honest about my feelings, like i was there when he relasped but i start talking my crazy shit and then suddenly mental illness is off the table??? whatever its not even like i like him or nothing like that. i dont understand why i do this to myself, this is just turning into a rant but ive been holding this down for so long it feels good to scream it out into the void that is tumblr yk? also like i drew on cut marks because it hurts less plus i can just wash that off, yk i do that a lot i put on makeup that made me look like i commeted suicide bc i was sad and suicidle(who would have gussed???) plus i just found this collage i really want to go to but no one belives i can do it and i act like that makes me wanna do it more but really it just shows how much people belive imma be a no body and im so scared im going to be suck here forever like my mom and dad. why does life have to be such a bitch like why do i always gotta screw up everything???? lke i have two boyfriends that care about me yet i want to date this girl thats never gonna love me back?? and when i say love i mean i actually love her so much and i cant talk about it because shell find out that im totally in love with her and shell flip out and distance herself from me and i need her shes my everything and if i don't have her in my life even just as a friend i think i need to switch schools again because that's what i always do, when shit gets rough go and hide because i cant handle all this shit and my parents are finally in a good place (mentally) and im gonna screw it up for them because ill stress them out by ignoring everyone and sleeping through meals and holidays and they'll yell at me because they don't understand and i don't blame them im a mess filled with self pity and gross tindencys so i cant have anyone love me truly because im so gross and i just want the felling of everything to stop, like i want to be so fucking happy that everyone thinks on on drugs, which i was on anti anxiety pills but then i felt nothing so i cut myself bu my dumbass was wearing white pants and my mom found out and yelled at me, and screamed and woke everyone up and my sibling still reminds me about it and every time he does i want to hold him down and beat the shit out of him, like does he even take my mental illness serously, does anyone??? are my parents just pretending to give a shit, at least my mom is, my dad cares for me but he just never says the right things, and i forgive him but i just want nothing to go wrong for once i just want everyone to stop. stop talking to me, stop trying to help but also ignoring my despreat cries for help doesn't make me feel any better and also i don't want to be lied toi want the truth even if it would hurt me yk? i don't know what i want, but i know it'd make me feel safe and happy and no long like everyone's trying to get me, i just want to have someone who'd look at all different sides of me and go "wow their awesome, and sure they do stuff i disagree with but there a good person who's gonna make it big and ill stand with them through thick and thin and its okay they have issues we all do and love every flaw" like im sure my boyfriend would say this but i don't want him to say it i want it shown i want to see and trust i can tell them anything and they'd stick around.

tldr: i was origanally posting this so everyone would know i didnt commet suicide but then it turned into a rant so, yah sorry, uh i read a really good south park fanfic so thats something good that happened, though it reminded me alot of me and me is my enemy rn so i was really angry but in a healthy good way, also thought my dad died but thats justsum good ol paranoia also sorry for all the typos, did ths on my computer at like 11:55 so im kinda half asleep

[trollocs-ooc]

5 6 29 & 40 forrrr the romancer gyuys the yaoi gyuys the the 11 & the 2nd

oof all of these r hard but ill try

5.Your oc has to make something for an art exhibition. What would they make? How terrible is it? Would they enjoy making it?

Second doesn't really do art but i feel like he'd have the "I dont know how to draw this, guess it'll have to look bad!" mindset. Based. He'd prolly draw some like political critique if it wouldn't get him murdered or some goofy shit

Eleven draws but he's not nearly confident enough about it to want his art in an exhibition. I feel like he'd be too much of a perfectionist or not know what's"good enough" to actually finish on time

6.What is your oc’s vocabulary like? Does it match the way they talk? How would you describe their speech?

Well this is hard because. My ocs have my own damn vocabulary 💀 but lets say

Second says anything on his mind and will talk in short sentences, unless hes ranting in which case be prepared for a novel of a rant. He doesn't care to carefully word himself so he won't be misinterpreted, in his mind anyone whos misinterpreting him is dumb and can fight him abt it. He's got favorite swears and a pretty simple vocabulary, but will drop random shit in there sometimes just cuz it's on his mind and HE gets it (like, on that post that i turned rbs off for, he said he was like Hrairoo foretelling the destruction of the warren, that's just a Watership down reference. I was gonna use the greek myth figure Hrairoo/Fiver was based on but i forgor what she was called). He talks like this irl

Elevens speech on the blog used to be carefully constructed, proper, calmly put, so he'd get misinterpreted as little as possible, and he usually didn't swear. As he loosened up more he started swearing more, and showing anxieties as well. The prim and proper speech is not how he talks irl. It is a completely different experience to have time to write something and to say it in a conversation. Just um or ahs everywhere. He doesn't have a big vocabulary

29.If your oc was in a video game, what would their idle animation be? (When the player stays still for too long, the animation that plays.)

Imma be honest idfk. Maybe eleven would sit down and pull out a sketchbook to draw and second would look generally annoyed and impatient

40.Are there any habits your oc has picked up from people around them? Do they know where they’re from? Does your oc try to stop themselves from doing it?

Eleven: swearing, pacing. He tries to stop himself from doing both of these

Second idk maybe caring more about his appearance? In a self care way not in an I'm So Ugly way

[paranoik0sempristis]

hi this is my first time writing here and i wanted to share a witchcraft experience. (note sorry if i have mistakes my english are kinda shit).

So a little backstory so u can get the point. Firstly i have never practiced physical witchcraft . I only studied because i wanted to know where i’m getting myself into. So i studied witchcraft for the past 4 years but i wasn’t constant on it cause i had other things to do. Theres so much shit to learn before practicing and its also confusing when and how to start . I cant find directions anywhere. With that in note

just now i just made my first spell . With whatever knowledge i have on witchcraft. And i guess im not going to be a bitch and gate keep what i did

imma tell u what i did step by step cause i don’t know what i did was right or wrong but it feels right to me …

So what i wanted to do was to cast a protection spell on me , healing and cleansing my mind from bad habits i constantly have, like remembering traumatic events.

Its night btw and the moon is like half a ring.

i opened the windows and cleansed my room with white sage. Then i lighted up 8 small candles and placed them on the floor like a little circle , cleansed my crystals and me and burned a bay leaf that said (PROTECT Y/N). Then i started to do 5 minutes meditation, guarding myself by imagining i have a bubble around me as a shield. I placed a crystal on my forehead (clear quartz) and teased my third eye.

when i was completely relaxed i lightened up a joint.

(im an adult dw) i used it as more relaxation, focusing, patience.

when i stopped smoking i started to write on a note book. I started to write to a person i wanted to get out of my head . I began saying that i want to clear my head from them . How i exactly felt my situation with that person ( be completely honest even if it hurts u) . Then i said that i understand and forgive myself and them . I said exactly how i got hurt and how my karma came back to me as well. Lastly i said that i wish them the best. An amazing life , how thankful i am for them and said goodbye with love.

i stop writing. I re-read the whole paper and then i fold it until became a small piece of paper . i placed the paper on a plate, i placed a bay leaf on top of the piece of paper , i dripped a melted candle on top , placed a small candle and light it up . Then i sprinkle the whole previous bay leaf (PROTECT Y/N) on top of the small candle . And lastly i placed some crystals.

i sat for a while and looked on the spell i just did. Later i placed my work on a desk in my room and i left it now to melt so it could work.

Now i can tell you how i feel after this spell.

I felt immediately amazing. I felt that everything worked cause i putted my heart and energy. I still feel relaxed and i dont have anxiety. Its like curse was broken.

What do you think ? Do you think that this was a good move as a beginner? Did i do something wrong? Idk what im doing i need help and tips please❤️

[vvh0adie]

can i just say that any writing done for free on the internet is not up for professional publishing critique

my thing is: unless i go on your blog and see the content you reblog/make pertains to some nasty heinous shit

(incest/race play/pedophilia/beastiality; meaning this is who you are as a legit person and you actively promote it in positivity)

then i go check your masterlist and its sewn into the fabric of your fics, imma side eye you, report, and block.

but lets be honest i would hope ppl just report/block during the first scroll cuz i don’t know why we’d want those type of people on tumblr anyway. tho we’re not here to discuss that further and definitely not another time. if you know you’re into the shit i listed above FOR REAL, get the fuck off my blog and play in traffic.

but if someone writes something you don’t like or if you think their writing isn’t up to gramatical/literary standard, don’t get in the fucking comments or asks to tell us that. we do this shit for fun. this isn’t fucking goodreads.

ALSO DONT REBLOG FICS YOU DIDNT ENJOY AND RATE THEM AND LEAVE BAD REVIEWS IN THE FUCKING POST. WE CAN SEE THAT SHIT!!! THIS GOES FOR TUMBLR, AO3, AND ANYWHERE ELSE THAT HOST NON-PROFIT FICTION WORKS.

(and no kofi and patreon don’t count as profit, if an author explicitly tells you that you will have access to their wips and early access to fanfiction that will eventually go onto tumblr or ao3. you already knew to expect some hobbyists writing. and you need to know from reading the already free content on their blog, that you like their writing well enough to invest in it. it doesn’t make sense to pay for something you KNEW you already hated. if it just so happens that you’re author sets a standard above what you consider fanfiction writing and it feels more professional, then lucky you…… it’s still not up for critique. that’s just means someone took their craft “serious enough”)

i also see you bitches who put ACTUAL FICS INTO GOODREADS! HAVE YOU LOST YO DAMN MIND CUZ LEMME HELP YOU FIND IT QUICKER THAN MOSES PARTED THE SEA!

when people come to your fic recs, they are most likely not looking for bad fics AT ALL, they’re hoping you’ve done your due diligence in curating a collection of fics you deem amazing so they DONT have to sift thru “bad” fics. you making more work for yourself and other readers.

but some of y’all love to be negative and get wet from twiddling your thumbs on this keyboard to spew unnecessary or productive “criticism”. unless we asks or have a link to a feedback box/google forms, SHUT THE FUCK UP.

social platforms besides goodreads are not here to help reader experience. goodreads is the place to leave reviews for BOOK YOU EITHER PAYED FOR OR THE AUTHOR HAS PROFESSIONALLY PUBLISHED FOR WIDER CONSUMPTION.

i love goodreads too and criticism of books I FIND AT BARNES AND NOBLES😁… because i’m able to avoid things like bad grammar, bad literary skills, poc and queer trauma porn, and other shit i don’t wanna be exposed to.

what i do think is valid, is asking a fic writer to tag properly. i’ve read shit and been blindsided cuz “dead dove” tags weren’t added. i’ve even asked and they’ve made it a point to belittle me. i thought it was a good fic in terms of plot but i wanted to be able to blacklist those words for if they wrote more content. but they completely turned me off due to how they responded so i just never wanted to read more of their work.

i didn’t harass them because frankly it had content i didn’t like (not anything that would make me question their overall morality, unless you count the not tagging, but that’s a bit much). instead i just blocked them and moved on.

there have been times where the grammar in a fic was really bad, the formatting of a fic had huge gaps that made reading difficult, or they didn’t put a cut on their fic. i didn’t contact them, i just blocked them.

so for the love of baby jesus, just block. only when you feel that something DETRIMENTAL is being posted like WHITE SUPREMACIST MANIFESTO or SOCIALLY TABOO type shit is being PROMOTED (they need to actually believe in this shit) in someone’s writing and has built a following of like-minded people, then really the troops so we can deal with it.

but bad grammar or that yandere fics with non-con in is not something to be harassing people over.

(some folks writing language is not their first so they’re learning thru writing or they’re a native speaker who still messes up/has a disability and just because some likes to write/read dark fics doesn’t mean they advocate such acts. plus while it may not be the healthiest, it’s some people’s coping mechanisms and i can’t blame them cuz a good therapist is hard to find and even harder to pay for —at least in the US)

so go read shit you actually like. and if you just so feeeeel it in yo spirit to rate some fics and leave bad reviews download Calibre Library and have at it. it is only seen by you and on your computer. so make that your lil hate diary or whateva🙄

anyway duces. i just had to say a lil sumn cuz i saw one of y’all attacking the homies. i love my moots and i miss the ones that left becuz of the bullshit💜💜💜

also if anyone thinks i left something out or wants to correct something feel free to tag me or reblog💖

[brainrot-yumm]

pr ep8 p-b-p

ayo I’m back and I was forced to get up early multiple times so I took a tonin at 1 am and I’m gonna watch this and hope my sleep schedule will be slightly more normal letsa go

why is there a cakeomatic in the juice bar

why does Trini always  knowwhat Billys saying is that likr her power

i can’t exactly describe why i feel this but if Billy doesn’t get covered in suds too then I think this is just body shaming agian

cool it was just body shaming. Why do overweight people have to get covered in glop all the time on this show? It’s pretty much only them. Occasionally it’s the skinny henchman too but otherwise no one. The rangers don’t get glop on them literally ever. Why them. idk it feels like you just wanna make fat people seem dirty and conventionally attractive people seem clean and that’s kinda gross to me. Not to be a stereotype it just grosses me out they keep doing that

“yall know about the rangers?” “what rangers” lmao

jason stop joshin man

jason just fortold all the alien seasons

actually imma be honest I have a headache and I’m fuckin wiped so I may only be 4 minutes into this (and the intro is at least 1 min) but i’m going to bed gnitht

cay im back let’s do this before I need to do normal things again

why ar eyou here the place is clOSED WE DONT NEED NAOTHER SHAMING STATION MAN

THE fuck kim?!

ew

wow the bully did a fake laught and I was just transported back to middle school the fuck

at least it was the skinny guy this time. Things may have evened out slightly. or they would have if there wasn’t JUST a cruel joke thrown out

guys you don’t have to be assholes when planning a surprise party. The point of a surprise is that it’s happy. You can give the bare minimum of bday wishes and still hide the fact that you’ve planned a massive party. ugh I hate that trope

you guys are assholes for trying to justify this

yes I also just wander into a vague canyonside when I’m upset too

“wow man the bad guys remembered my birthday. My friends gave less of a shit than the fucking evil alien enemies.”

shit that was a blow to the chest is he okay

you guys this is a SHARPENED IRON SWORD spandex isn’t gonna hold this teenager’s body together from hits like that, I watch forged in fire I would know

so they’re . . . blade blasters . . ?

oooh that line was really post-done

man is Kim okay? like she never does rolecall, she never gets to shout her megazord thing, her zord isn’t pink like her, why’s she being pseudo kicked from the group like that

zach has no object permanence confirmed

aw I don’t think Melissa was invited :(

cool now it’s both ernie and billy I feel better

they all look so uncomfortable lmao

no wait I think I see melissa!! :D

kay good afternoon it isn’t nightime

[xsarcasticwriterx]

Room

Summary: After Hydra captured you and tony they decided to use a weapon that was more terrifying than any gun.

Pairing: Tony stark x reader

Warnings: Smut(imma be honest i dont give a fuck if you aren't 18 pfft), sex pollen, fingering, riding, masturbation,honestly just desperate horny sex, floof floof, Swearing,

Notes: The end to the smut part is kinda shit sorry about that 

How you and tony ended up here was unknown to you. Well not unknown just...complicated. Turns out not all of hydra was taken down in the fall of S.H.I.E.L.D. The others sent you and tony in figuring that it would be easy peasy and all make it home before dinner. Well that wasn't the case at all. Turns out they had weapons more powerful then the two of you combined. They subdued your powers and broke tony's suit. 

So now you two are here. Trapped in an empty white room. you paced around looking for anything but to be honest it was so bright you could barely see anything from seeing too much? 

“there's no point there's nothing here” he said from his spot on the floor. you grumbled before sitting against the wall across from the door. “we need to find a way out” you said sighing. Tony opened his mouth before the air started to pour in. it burned as it entered your nostrils. you started coughing like crazy hunched over as you coughed. “hey are you-” tony started but then also started coughing. 

your lungs burned no your whole body burned. you felt like you were on fire. you stopped coughing but the heat in your whole body was still strong. “hey tony you ok?” you asked as you slowly moved towards the wall he laid against. “dont dont just stay” he said putting his hand out. you stopped moving and sat back huffing. That's when you felt it. your whole body tingled and burned but the pooling of wetness between your legs was prominent. you squeezed your thighs and looked at tony who was looking down at his legs. 

Your eyes followed seeing his very present boner. you cleared your throat. “whats going on” you asked in a rush because every word that exited your mouth felt like it took all your might and breath. Tony shook his head. “fuck!” he yelled. “thor he said that on certain planets fucking doesn’t come as a normal thing sO to stop the inevitable extinction of that they use this stuff to make them have to fuck. anyways apparently some parts of the world got their hands on it, used it as a weapon before it got banned.” he said leaning his head on the wall. Sweat fell from his face. “just fucking go over there” he pointed to the other side of the room.

you nodded and crawled to the other side. you sat in the corner but kept adjusting yourself. you squeezed your thighs for some sort of relief. “will this kill us?” you eventually asked. when tony stayed silent you got worried and looked over. he was looking at you hungrily his eyes devoured you. “possibly” he eventually said. “possibly?!” you yelled then groaned the amount that you were turned on was physically starting to hurt. “depends how much your body can take how much heat and pain before giving up” he said before closing his eyes and moving around. 

You sat there sweating your ass off and moving your legs around. anything that usually caused relief was useless. then the heat got worse and a stabbing pain in your uterus happened. You hunched over and screamed. The pain only seemed to increase. “hey hey speak to me whats going on” tony asked. “pain so much fucking pain” you groaned and screamed as another stab came. “and hot so hot” you said tears falling to the ground as you grit your teeth.

“ok ok y/n listen to me” he said clearing his throat. “you need to do this your going to say no because of me but your life is kind of dependent upon it. you need to get yourself off.” he said. you looked at him wide eyes and shook your head “fuck no” you said. “want the pain to stop?” he asked. you screamed feeling the pain and nodded. “then do it” you groaned lifting yourself back to sit against the wall. 

Tony turned around giving you more privacy. you took off your pants and underwear. your hand went to your clit giving you relief you moaned and groaned. you inserted two fingers moaning loud. “jesus oh god” you gasp as your fingers go in and out of you. you look over at tony and see his arm moving up and down. you gulp looking down before speaking. “tony” you whispered but with the echo of the room he heard. “yes?” he whispered back. “you can turn around if you want.” you said.

Tony slowly turned seeing your legs spread and your fingers inside of you. Tony's pants were open slightly lowered from his waist. his boxers were visible and you whimpered at the site of tony so disheveled. You started to move your fingers in and out of you again. you moaned and whimpered. Tony started to push his cock over his boxers. “you can ya know if you want to” you said nodding to his strained dick.

Tony shimmed his boxers down and his cock sprung free. It was long and thick. you groaned and moved faster. you watched as tony started to stroke his cock at the same pace your fingers went. You stared at him jacking off as he stared at you. You started to feel your walls tighten. you head hit the wall as your fingers spend up. your thumb rubbed your clit as your moans got more intense. Your walls squeezed your fingers and you moaned loud. you squeezed your eyes shut and your mouth hung open. The sight of you made tony go faster and groan. 

As your orgasm stopped you still felt like it wasnt enough like nothing would be enough. How do you feel” tony asked between breaths. “still feel like shit” you say. Tony releases his cock and looks down. “me too.” he said. 

You scream feeling the pain again. God why wont this all justs stop. you started to cry the pain was so bad. you curled up hoping it would be like a period cramp and certain positions could stop it but the pain kept going. “y/n...” tony started to say. you looked over at him. Your hair was a sweaty mess your face looked flushed and you just looked like a horny mess.

“We can...it'll stop it if that's what you want.” tony said. He felt bad like he was taking advantage of you. He didn't want you to think he didn't care for you because he did. Hell he loved you, god he wished he told you that before you ended up here. He hated seeing you in pain especially when he could stop it even if it did make things difficult. “is that what you want” you huffed out tears still falling down your face. “I want to stop the pain. I want to help you..in whatever way i can.” tony said. 

you gulped and nodded “help me” you said. Tony crawled over to you and sat you back against the wall. you instinctively opened your legs and tony say between them. “I'm going to make you feel so good princess” he said with a smirk. He kissed you hard but slow. you felt his hand on your thigh. He squeezed it before moving forward. “please” you pleaded against his lips. he smiled and pulled your bottom lip with his teeth. His fingers made contact with your clit and you whimpered, closing your eyes. he pinched it making you moan. He started to move in circles smiling at the noises that came out of your lips.

he kissing your bottom lip before kissing you. his fingers moved inside of you his thumb circling your clit. you moaned against his lips. “that's it let me make the pain go away.” he said his fingers moving in and out. you grabbed onto tony's shoulders. your hips moved meeting his movements. “there we go princess” he said. He bent his fingers meeting a spot that made your mouth open and no noise exit. “jesus fuck tony there please there” you pleaded. His finger massaged the spot he stoked and pushed it. Your walls tighten around his fingers. you pull him closer your head hitting his shoulder. his fingers stroke the spot why still playing with your clit. You moan as you cum on his fingers.

“it still hurts” you mumble into his shoulder. “i know princess i just needed to die down the pain before this” he said pulling away from you. You were sweating even more now and you felt so empty without tony. tony shoved his boxers down and taking off his shirt. He went back to his spot between your legs. “I really wish i could've said this before now but i love you”  he said before entering you. you moaned before you could respond or even process what he said. He bottomed out and kissed your neck.

His fingers found there way back to your clit messing with the very sensitive bundle of nerves. you rocked your hips trying to gain movement. tony took the sign and rocked back and forth. He was trying to be nice but nice isn't what you needed. “faster tony.” you said. tony sped up but it still wasn't enough. grabbing tony's shoulder you made him stop. he looked at you softly. “tony stark you are a playboy ok now rail me” you said desperate. something changed in tony because he pulled out pushing you to the floor and before you could do anything he shoved all the way back into you. 

He grabbed your hips jamming in and out of you at a force you didn't know existed. he played with your clit going from pinching to slapping to rubbing it. you moaned and screamed. grabbing onto tony's shoulder you puled him into a kiss. You felt your walls tighten again from the stimulation your grip in him tightens and tony goes to kissing and marking your neck. 

“cum for me princess” he says. that was all it took for you to unravel under him. you put your head onto his shoulder shutting your eyes. tony pulled out and flipped you over lifting your hips. he held on tightly ramming in and out of you. you felt his movements sputter and you moved your hips to meet his. his nails dug into your skin as his cum flushed into you. he pulled out and flipped you over. “better?” he asked. you nodded “much” you said. 

The pollen seemed to have died down after that. Tony laid next to you and you curled into him. “I love you too stark” you said tracing over his chest. he looked down at you and you looked up. “I have for a while” you said. tony smiled and kissed your forehead. “Let's get the hell out of here princess” he said.