#incorrect clintasha

[randomstuffjustrandom]

Presents

Tony: Present time!!!

Avengers giving each other gag gifts and stuff.

Natasha, handing Clint a present: Here, Clint.

Clint, shaking the box: Ooh. I hope it's HYDRA heads. Please be HYDRA heads, please be HYDRA heads.

Clint opens the box: It's HYDRA heads. (The head of some HYDRA ppl)Awww, how did you know?

Natasha, smiling: Merry Christmas

Avengers: *horrified silence*

[slavicshadownr]

Steve: I don't know, we all just kind of thought you were dating... Clint: Why would you think that? Bruce: You always finish each other's sentences. Natasha, sighing: That's not romance, that's wanting to have the last word.

[finequeenbean]

Tony: How did none of you hear what I just said?!

Steve: I've been zoned out for the past two and a half hours.

Clint: I got distracted halfway through.

Natasha: Ignoring you was a conscious decision.

[mamaspidershit]

Natasha, half-asleep: How is everyone doing today? Clint: Well, I’m still breathing. Natasha: Are your standards really that low? Clint: I mean, it’s better than Peter over there. Peter, having a panic attack: I can’t breathe.

[westannatasharomanoff]

*Clint and Natasha are driving somewhere*

Clint: Ugh. The gps says it’s gonna take an hour and two minutes to get there.

Natasha: Yikes.

*roughly three minutes later*

Clint: Oh, good! It’s saying it’s only gonna take 59 minutes now. The time is getting shorter.

Natasha: What?

Clint: It was gonna take an hour and two minutes, and now it’s only going to take 59 minutes.

Natasha: Yeah, because three minutes have passed.

Clint: What do you mean?

Natasha: We’ve been driving for the past three minutes, and now we’re closer to where we’re going, so it’s gonna take less time.

Clint: I think you just broke my brain.

[georgie3116]

Natasha: Bucky is great. I mean, he’s into all the same things I’m into.

Clint: Well, so am I. Now, I don’t want to sound as insecure as I really am, but you’re not trying to replace me with this Bucky dude are you?

Natasha: Clint… Your first uniform was literally an 80’s bright purple spandex suit and a ridiculous Halloween mask, no one could ever replace you - believe me.

Clint: Good because I may not be your Russian Assassin Best Friend…

Clint: BUT I AM DEFINITELY YO BEST FRIEND. YOU GOTTA PROBLEM WITH THAT!?

Natasha: No…

[kmartkiddieisle]

*The Squad when asked about their earlier confession of love*

Steve: Yeah, you're lucky. I like you.

Tony: I'd understand if you didn't feel the same way...

Thor: *has a panic attack* What confession?

Bruce: *winks* I know, babe. You like me too.

Clint: So what? Are you going to date me or not?

Nat: It was a dare.

[i-a-q]

Natasha: You’re a mess.

Clint: Yeah, but you still stick around.

[auroraromaximoff]

Clint: Everyone is always like; “How’d you get with Natasha?” “How’d you bag Natasha?” Bro I didn’t bag shit. Natasha picked me up, by my neck, threw me over her shoulder, and I’ve been on it ever since. And I don’t have any plans on getting off anytime soon.

Nat: *Winks*

[winter-angst]

Clint: what’s gaslighting?

Natasha: you know what it is

Clint: no I don’t?

Natasha: yes you do

[tashaclint]

Clint to Natasha: What gives? You are supposed to tell me everything. My whole life is predicated upon judging people unfairly on your behalf.

[randomstuffjustrandom]

New Years kiss

Tony: So, Red. Who are you going to kiss at midnight tonight?

Natasha: What makes you think I’m kissing anyone at midnight. I am strong and independent. I don’t need anybody.

Tony: Clint asked you, didn’t he? It’s Clint, isn’t it?

Natasha: …

Natasha: yes.

[slavicshadownr]

Phil: Agent Romanoff what are you doing? Natasha: Wrapping Barton’s desk in Saran Wrap. Phil: Uh why? Natasha: He stole my one of my knives. Phil: Couldn’t you have just taken it back? Natasha: I couldn’t find it so I removed all sharp objects from the office so he has to either unwrap it by hand or use my knife. He’s a dumbass so he’ll use my knife which is when I will steal it back and he is left to unwrap it by hand as punishment for stealing my knife in the first place. Phil: That is actually genius. Natasha: Yes. It is.

[finequeenbean]

Clint: We have a problem.

Natasha: No, YOU have a problem. I have an idiot who keeps making them.

[mamaspidershit]

Natasha: So today I learned that Peter has me in his cellphone as "Ms Spidermom". Clint, shrugging: Could be worse. Wanda and Pietro have each other down as "spare parts"

[ellastarkwinchester3000]

Someone: “That’s a weird f*cking tone, man.”

Clint, looks between the person and Natasha: “That’s just how she sounds, she has an asshole voice! Nat, tell them they’re ok!”

Natasha, glaring: “Everything’s great.”

Clint, looking at Natasha in disbelief: “Dude.”