#it’s 6 pm and I’m ready for bed

[littlexdeaths]

i met so many cute animals today but i’m so fucking exhausted 🫠

[gojonanami]

❝ 𝐉𝐔𝐒𝐓 𝐖𝐀𝐍𝐍𝐀 𝐅𝐔𝐂𝐊 𝐖𝐈𝐓𝐇 𝐘𝐎𝐔, 𝐉𝐔𝐒𝐓 𝐓𝐎 𝐌𝐀𝐊𝐄 𝐔𝐏 𝐖𝐈𝐓𝐇 𝐘𝐎𝐔 !! ❞

❝ WHEN YOUR EX HUSBAND FINDS OUT YOU'RE DATING AGAIN, HOW DO YOU END UP FUCKING HIM IN YOUR BED ?? ❞

✧ pairing: ex-husband!satoru gojo x f!reader

✧ summary: satoru gojo is the man everyone wants, except you -- well you married him and you wanted him, but when he pushed you away after you had your daughter, you had no choice but to divorce him. so what happens when he comes to pick up your daughter for his weekend, and he finds you ready for a date? and how is it you always end up under him?

✧ warnings: 18+, nsfw, so much smut, exes to lovers, modern au! (no curses), gojo is a CEO of a company, gojo has a daughter with you, divorced, some angst, switch! gojo, nipple play, oral (f + m), fingering (f! receiving), handjob (m! receiving), semi public sex (near entryway), semi exhibitionism, sex (p in v), creampie, swearing,

✧ wc: 8,271

“You were supposed to be here at 6:00 PM,” 

Satoru Gojo stood in your doorway, as opposed to splashed on the covers of magazines and countless front page articles — you would think it would be business magazines, but you would only be partially correct — he made the covers of business, fashion, health, entertainment, and even a few women’s magazines. 

And what every single one had made apparent in their colorful print was that Satoru Gojo was anyone’s ideal man — the CEO of the wildly successful Six Eyes Corp, a philanthropist in his free time spent mentoring children and teenagers through establishing proper programs, and he was flawlessly beautiful — ocean blue eyes you could drown in, porcelain skin seemingly without a blemish or scar, and pretty lips that were a weapon when curled in a smirk. 

Just as they were now. 

“Well,” he smirks, leaning against your door frame, “I’m sure it’s 6:00 PM somewhere,” 

“Well, I’m not concerned with somewhere else since you daughter exists here, not elsewhere,” your words lacked their usual bite, only tinged with annoyance rather than cutting anger, “but good thing I told you to be here an hour and half earlier than I needed you,” 

Needed him as just as you did before you had divorced — just as you asked him to be. But he only grew more distant by the day — and soon he was already out the door when you had served him with divorce papers. 

And now, you can almost forget how it used to be — your eyes catch sight of the picture on your mantle of the two of you with your daughter, Satoru’s lips pressed to your cheeks as yours were pressed to your little angel — almost. 

He gapes at you as you walk inside, as he follows behind you, the click of the door closing overshadowed by the sound of his voice. 

“How could you lie to me, sweetheart? Thought we had a bond of trust,” you don’t have to look back at him to know he has a pout on his lips that would quickly melt into a grin if you conceded. 

“Bond of trust ended when you showed up two hours late to pick up our daughter,” and he grumbles, cheeks tinged with pink. 

“That was one time! I’m never that late. And it’s only on a Fridays when I have—“ 

“Meetings all day,” you finish with a sigh, “I know, Gojo, I know it’s not on purpose — but I know you’re always late on Fridays so I found a solution,” your lips curl, “anyway, our girl is napping still, so give her a bit before you wake her, but you can stay here until she does,” you’re shrugging off your bathrobe, littered with flecks of makeup, only to have a gorgeous black dress underneath. 

One that he very much hadn’t seen before — and he would know, he’s explored every centimeter very intimately of each one of your dresses, but this is new. His eyes skim down the exposed skin of your thighs — very new, but very familiar. 

He’s running fingers through his hair, not bothering to hide how his gaze rakes over his body, “Special occasion? Don’t tell me your birthday suddenly moved months, or I forgot our anniversary,” 

You scoff, as you pick out earrings from your jewelry box,  “Does an anniversary count when you’re divorced?” you can’t hide the hint of bitterness in your voice, and he’s stepping closer as you look in your vanity to put your earrings on, only to meet his gaze in the mirror, deep blue sucking you in as it always does. 

“But you’ll always be mine,” and you roll your eyes, expecting a cheeky grin, but find genuine longing in his expression, before it's hidden away behind a frown, “but you still haven’t told me where you’re going, sweetheart,” 

A sigh stuck in your throat, ignoring the use of your usual pet name that he had lost the rights when the ink dried on your divorce, as your teeth graze your bottom lip, “I have a date tonight,” 

He tilts his head, “A date?” and you can already hear it in his voice — ice creeping over usually still waters, “who’s the lucky guy? And do I get to meet him?” 

“And have you scare him off?” And he only grins in reply, hands slipping into his pockets. 

“If he’s intimidated by me, isn’t that more on him than me, sweetheart?” His footsteps only grow closer, as you turn to look at him, his hand on the wood of your vanity, nearly caging you in on side, “after all, he may be your date, but I’ll always be your husband, and the father of our daughter,” 

You didn’t know whether you wanted to kiss him or slap him — slapping him was self explanatory, but the want to kiss him was a lingering feeling, one that you couldn’t shed — no matter how much time passed. But that was the thing about Satoru Gojo — it was easy to fall in love with him, but even harder to fall out. 

And a part of you could never admit to yourself that you never did. 

No matter how hard you try.

“You haven’t been my husband for a year and half now, Gojo — a year legally now,” 

And he’s changing tactics, “You still haven’t answered my question, who are you going on a date with?” And you already can feel the beginning of a headache throbbing in your forehead, and you know why no one could say no to Satoru Gojo — because you’re sure he’s never understood it. 

“Why do you need to know?” And he's tilting his head, a small scoff parting his lips. 

“I need to know who you're potentially bringing home, don’t I?” and he’s far too close, and you don’t know why you’re not pulling away — his breath warming your skin, as he drags a finger down your cheek, “The man who might step foot in our home, might meet our daughter,” and his thumb brushes over your lips, “might kiss my wife—“ 

“Gojo—“ 

“Satoru,” he corrects you. 

You rub at your temples — yup, you definitely have a headache now. You brush past him, heading to the living room to pick up some of the mess, hoping your ex would somehow fall and hit his head on the doorframe and forget this conversation.

“And this dress?” Ah, no such luck, “did you buy it for the date?” 

“Do you keep a catalog of my wardrobe?” you scowl as you pick up the strewn about toys and things to collect into your daughter’s toy bin, and he’s bending down too to pick up your daughter’s things in his hundred thousand yen suit. 

“So you didn’t deny it,” and you sigh again, but grit your teeth all the same, his sharp words finely grating on your nerves. 

“This isn’t a business negotiation, you don’t win just because you use my words against me,” you stand up after picking up the last of the things, “yes it’s a new dress, and yes I bought it for the date since this is my first date in years, happy?” 

“Thrilled,” he says flatly, and you know it’s not the end of the discussion, “remember our first date?” 

And how could you forget? But you decide to humor him, if only for a break from the interrogation. 

“Which one? Because one was a date, and the other—“ 

He raises an eyebrow, “It was a date too, I asked you out—“ 

“You asked me to hang out—“ 

“And we kissed—“ 

“Only because I told you how I felt first—“ and he smirks again and you know you’ve dug yourself into a hole, cheeks burning at his stupidly smug face, “shut up,” 

“And what did you say again?” He slips the things you have in your hands into the toy box, his fingers brushing yours, and his touch is the same as you remember, even the barest brush was enough for your traitorous soul to yearn for more. 

“You know what I said,” his lips curl, the same smile he had given you all those years ago that made you fall for him in the first place, but his raise of his brow tells you he’s not going to let it go until you say it, “I told you that I liked you for a long time, and I was tired of waiting for you to make the first move. Because maybe by then it would be too late,” and his fingers brush against your cheek, featherlight — just as the bunches of butterflies that bloom in your stomach. 

“And you say that wasn’t a date,” and you scoff, biting back the small smile on your lips, “will any other first date compare to that?” 

“Gojo—“ 

“Satoru,” he corrects, and you know his brow is furrowed without having to look at him, “do you have to call me by my last name—“ 

“I do, because Satoru was my husband, and Gojo is my ex—“ 

“I’m still your husband—“ and you give a bitter chuckle. 

“In what world? We’re divorced, it’s over,“ 

“It doesn’t have to be,” 

“But it does. This isn’t me confessing to you on a movie night curled up on my twin bed. This is my ex-husband asking me to give him another chance far too late,” you slip past him, but he follows behind anyway, as you stand near the entryway to your home,  “it’s time to move on,” and you’re stepping from your bedroom and only reach the doorway when he speaks. 

“How can I move on when I never wanted to?” You still yourself in your tracks, fingers curling into a fist. 

Not this right now. Not now. “Gojo—“ you sigh. 

You’re so tired. You were hoping you wouldn’t have to have this conversation. You never had expected to have this conversation, not when you wanted to only marry one man your entire life was the one to break your heart. 

“It's almost two years too late for this conversation,” you willed your voice not to break — not when your heart was long broken by him, and you wouldn’t allow him to do it again, “you should have had it with me before I filed. When I asked you to spend your time with us, when I asked you to take time off, when I asked you to be present in our lives—“ 

“Sweetheart-“ and you snap. 

“Don’t call me that,” your quiet words hang in the silence, the wedding bells he heard in his head were nothing more than the sounds of bells drowning out the mourners screams, “don’t call me that when you don’t get to anymore,” 

“I’ll always be yours, sweetheart, a few papers don’t change that,” and he’s stepping towards you, but you’re rooted to your spot, and you want to say it’s stubbornness, but you know what it really is —weakness, because Satoru Gojo was your one and only weakness. And even now, walls raised and erected against him came tumbling down with one touch. 

Because he knew exactly where to touch and what to say. 

“Do you think any other man could please you the way I can? I know every place, every sound, every inch of you — inside and out,” he’s nearly against your back now, “are you going to let a stranger do that? Let them learn how to please you, but knowing your husband knows how to do it better,” 

“Ex-husband,” and he’s leaning down to press a kiss to your bare shoulder, “we shouldn’t—“ 

“And yet you’re letting me,” his nose brushes against the soft skin of your neck, warm breath sending a shiver down to the tips of your toes, and his words sending a wave of need right to your core, “because you know it’s true,” his hands tentatively brush against your hips and when you don’t resist, he squeezes, drawing a gasp from you, lips curled in a smirk, “more sensitive than usual, Princess? Been too long?” 

“I swear to god—“ he’s cutting you off with a bruising kiss, a rubber band snapping back against your skin, and now it’s taut against you, ensnaring you in its grasp. And yet, his kiss is so sweet, affection dripping from the slide of lips to the caress of his fingers against your cheek, and it reminds you of just why you don’t want to let go. 

“You don’t have to swear yourself to me, but I’d appreciate it, Princess,” and his mouth reminds you of the reason you (and that you don’t). 

“Gojo—“ and he’s placing more kisses along your jaw now. 

“Shouldn’t you at least call me Satoru now that we’ve kissed?” 

“You’re impossible—“ 

“And yet I’m here,” his teeth nibbles at the juncture of your neck and shoulder, tongue flicking over the blooming love bite, “almost forgot how sweet you taste,” he’s humming, as he kisses along your shoulder before he toys with the strap of your dress, “almost,” his large palms slide down your body, skimming your bare thighs as he’s pressing you against the walls, “but your skin isn’t what I want to taste,” 

You gasp, “we can’t—“ but why were you letting him? Irritation overrode by lust, and he knew the spots to make you bend to him, his hands squeezing your hips, “fuck you,” you wonder if his touch are phantoms engraved against your skin and muscles, forced to repeat the same patterns again and again — and a hand slides back up to cup your cheek. 

“That’s what I’m trying to do, sweetheart,” his lips find yours again, his tongue dragging against the seam of your lips, before slipping inside. His hand is lifting your thigh around his waist, as his lips part from your own, eyes raking over your pretty, bitten red lips, “do you know how much I missed you?” 

“No, I don’t,” and his smile slips from his lips, as he cups your chin, “Satoru—“ 

“Even all the days I was gone, there wasn’t a second I didn’t think of you,” you waver a moment at the sadness rippling through his gaze, “I know I wasn’t there—“ his lips press a kiss to your forehead. 

“Why weren’t you?” 

And that’s when there’s a knock at the door that makes your heads snap over to stare at the door a good four or five feet from you, the shadow of feet visible through the crack at the bottom of the door, and you were sure it was your date. 

“Fuck,” you whsiper under your breath, “you have to go—“ your palms pressed flat against his chest, but Satoru doesn’t budge, “please, I have to get the—“ 

And his hand is slipping up and under your dress, hiking the material higher, “do you really want to go on your date like this, sweetheart?” His fingers graze your soaked panties, a gasp pulled from your lips, lithe fingers rubbing and pinching your clit through the thin fabric, “gonna go see him when you’re this wet?”

“Please—“ and his fingers snap the elastic of your underwear against your skin, drawing a squeal from your mouth, “fuck—“ 

“Any louder, Princess, and he might hear us,” he’s leaning down to press his forehead to yours, forcing your gaze to meet yours, “but maybe I should let him, let him know who’s the only one who can make you feel this good,” his words only make your cunt flutter, as if your body was in agreement, even if your mind was still in denial, “you’re much more honest down here, Princess, but you always were,”

Another knock as your attention is being tugged only for him to yank it back as his finger slips inside you. You’re burying your face in the crook of his neck to stifle your moans — his fingers were so much longer than yours, reaching places you could only have dreamed of — when you had dreamed of him. 

His finger squelches as he fucks you open, walls squeezing around him as your molten insides cling to his touch desperately. Small whines and pants are muffled against your hand as you clamp it over, your phone vibrating uselessly with your date’s messages inside your purse. 

“Please, Satoru let me—“ and he’s ripping your underwear, as he’s forcing your dress higher, “I have to tell him—“ 

“Tell him what?” His eyes are nearly glowing in the dim light of the fluorescents leaking in from the living room, “tell him you’d go on your date with him but you’re too busy being finger fucked by your husband?” And he’s sinking another finger into you, making your head loll back against the wall, “tell him that you’d let him fuck you in our bed, but you’re too busy letting me?” 

“Sa-toru—“ you’re biting back your whines, glancing at the door, but he’s forcing your gaze back to him, his thumb pressed against your chin, “just let me—“ 

And he’s turning you in front of the mirror near the entryway, forcing you to look at yourself — your lips kiss bitten and ruined, your dress hiked up and mussed, and underwear tugged down to your ankles. 

“Do you want him to see you like this?” His breath is hot in your ear, a soft murmur that makes your knees nearly buckle, “want him to see you how much of a mess I’ve made you?” His fingers sink into you again, a third finger with the other two. The lewd squelch of your cunt rings in your ears, your eyes catching sight of your own moans and pants in the mirror, your walls squeezing around them, “I’m the only one who gets to see you like this, sweetheart, and now you can watch too,” he’s guiding your gaze back to watch yourself, watching him knuckle deep in your sweet cunt, “gonna make you watch your tight pussy break my fingers,” he spreads his fingers inside you, letting you watch your slice drip down his fingers and wrist and splatter on the floor.

And your head falls back against his shoulder — he’s thrusting into you faster, your walls working deeper and deeper into you — fingers curling against your molten insides, until he’s finding that one spot that has your lips falling open, “I’m so—” your voice is a broken whisper, and he’s pressing a kiss to your jaw, “Please—“ 

“Cum f’me baby,” his thumb rubs at your clit, and you do, walls clamping down as you cum, his fingers relentless as they fuck you through your orgasm, a wordless moan of his name on your lips. He’s holding you up as he does, your body buckling under the pleasure, blood roaring in your ears that slowly ebbs away, as his fingers slow, and you’re shuddering under his touch, “good girl,” and your walls flutter as he pulls out as if they want him to stay, and he’s tilting your gaze, “watch,” your eyes open reluctantly, a small moan on your lips as you watch him carefully each one of his fingers clean, pink tongue darting out to lick at the trails of your juices that had dripped down his palm and wrist, “still the sweetest thing I’ve had, princess,” 

And there’s another knock, as he clicks his tongue, “Doesn’t give up does he?” and he’s pressing a kiss to your neck, “must have really done a number on him and he’s willing to wait this long for you, huh?” he hums, nuzzling the hollow of your throat, “but I can relate. So, should I let him down for you?” 

Your eyes fly open, meeting his cheeky gaze with a glare, “Don’t you fucking dare,” 

“What? You still want to go out with him? Be my guest, but,” and he’s pulling at your ruined underwear until they rip under his touch, “can’t wear these, can you?” you gape at him as he pockets the ruined panties with a shit eating grin, “for later,” and you’re scoffing, and you hear a call of your name through the door. 

And you take a better look at yourself — completely disheveled and marked up along your neck from his kisses and nips, your skin shiny with a sheen of sweat, and your lips obviously bruised and bitten from his treatment. 

“Fuck,” you can’t go out like this — it looks as if you’d spent the morning before getting ravished, panic sets in as you hear his voice through the door. 

“Want me to send him on his way?” Satoru’s hands curl around your waist, “our angel’s still fast asleep, and that means we can spend some time together—“ 

“Fuck off,” you hiss, walking over to the door, “Atsuya, I’m sorry I can’t go out today. I’m not feeling well,” 

“Eh? Are you okay? Do you need anything?” And Satoru steps forward to speak but you cover his mouth with his hand. 

“No, I’m fine, but I have the flu and I’m still contagious, so I don’t want to get you—“ Satoru drags his tongue between your fingers — this fucker, “sick,” 

“Are you sure you don’t want me to stay and take care of you?” Satoru’s hands are dragging over your sides, squeezing your far too sensitive hips. 

“Hear that?” Satoru’s whispering to you between the gaps of your fingers, “He wants to take care of you. Should you let him? Maybe he could fuck you better in the home we bought together and in the bed we shared,” 

“No, I’m fine, really, I-I—“ and Satoru’s sucking at your finger, tongue curling around the digit, and you grit your teeth, “I’m going to rest. I’ll text you later, I’m sorry—“ and you don’t get to hear the rest of what he says, as Satoru’s pulling your hand away, and finding your lips in another kiss. 

You hate how good this man is at kissing, his lips and touch must have the ability to leech sense from your brain, and leave lust in its place. 

“What’s wrong with you?” you mumble against his lips, as his lips burn a trail of kisses down your jaw, a smirk against your skin. 

“Nothing’s wrong with me, except that I love you,” he’s pouting again, “you think that guy could please you the way I could?” 

“No, but maybe he would actually be there,” you bite back and his kisses pause, smirk slipping into a frown. 

“I know I’ve made mistakes—“ 

You give a bitter chuckle, “Mistakes? You left us,” 

He opens and closes his mouth, “you’re right I did, and I’m sorry,” his words are slow, but so is the anger building inside you, “but I’m asking for a second chance, begging for one more chance—“ 

You finally turn to face him, and you can only hope the tears welling in your eyes weren’t noticeable, “You don’t get to beg, when I already did,” your voice finally breaks, as your clenched fist shakes, “where were you? After our daughter was born, you were gone. You kept saying you would make time for us, you would be there for us, but you just busier and busier, and the only time I’d see you were the nights you made it home to crawl into bed,” 

“I—“ 

“No, I’m tired, I’m tired of waiting and being upset, I’m so done—“ and he’s pulling you into his arms, and the familiarity of his grasp is nearly enough for your defenses to crumble, but you can’t, “Satoru” 

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I know I did wrong. I know I don’t deserve you or our baby, not after all I did,” he’s murmuring, “but it was never because of you or her,” 

Tears spill from your eyes, streaming down your cheeks, “I used to cry, thinking that not only that I wasn’t enough, but your daughter wasn’t enough either—“ 

“You weren’t the ones that wasn’t enough,” he cuts you off, “I am,” the last words come out a whisper, as he runs fingers through his hair, “I’m the one who wasn’t good enough,” 

You stare at him, “What do you mean?” 

He’s scrubbing a hand down his face, “I don’t know how to be a husband, much less a father. I didn’t think I even wanted to be either, until I met you,” his voice softens, “and then I wanted it all if it was with you,” 

“Satoru—“ and he’s shaking his head. 

“I thought I could handle it — but when I saw you two — the two most important people in my life — how much you were counting on me, how much you needed me to not fail — I threw myself into work,” he’s swallowing, “I thought if I could support you both, things would get better. But it only made things worse because I pushed myself away,” 

“Why?”

“Because I thought I’d mess it up — I don’t know how to be a father. I didn’t even know I wanted to be a husband until we got married,” and you swallow, “I thought I never would after watching my dad neglect and abuse me and my mom,” you knit your brow together, “and there were so many nights when you were sleeping, I got so frustrated with our angel. She wouldn’t sleep, she screamed for hours, and I just felt like I had failed her. And I would just fail you too,” he scrubbed a hand down his face, “so—“  

“So you ran away,” you finish, voice caught in your throat. 

He gives a curt nod, “And when you filed, I knew it was coming, but I thought you both would be better off. I thought even if I was miserable, it would be worth it to see you two happy—“ 

“Satoru, do you think I would be happy without my husband?” Your sigh stuck in your throat as your fingers find his cheek, featherlight, but he crumbles and melts against it, as if he was a statue made to wait for your touch, “you’re nothing like your father. I see you with Satomi, I see how much you love her — you dote on her, you know what she likes — she gets a cut and you’re panicking,” you chuckle as he huffs, a cute blush settling over his cheeks, “and you were a good husband, when you talked to me and didn’t run away,” 

“I know,” and the question unspoken hangs in the air, “can I be again? Your husband,” and your instinct is to pull him into your arms, where you wanted him to be, where you always wanted to be, but your instinct is tangled in fear, barbed wire dragging you down and digging into your skin. 

“I want you to be,” his eyes light up, hope flicking across his gaze like a comet tail, until it burns out with your next words, “but I’m scared,” you swallow, arms crossed, hoping if you physically hold yourself maybe you could hold yourself together, “I don’t want to get hurt again,” 

“I won’t, I promise,” he’s cupping your cheek again, and you find yourself leaning into his touch, “every night I only thought of you and Satomi — there’s no one else that matters,” he’s drawing closer again, it makes you want nothing more than his touch again — it had been too long — too long without him. 

And your lips find his again, it’s a chaste kiss at first, a breath shared a centimeter apart, as his eyes find yours, brow furrowed, “We have a lot to talk about,” you murmur, as your lips graze his again, and he’s chasing your lips, “but it’s going to take time,” God, you want to kiss his knowing pout away, as you drag a thumb down his lips, “a lot of making up to me and our angel,” He’s nodding obediently, a complete puppy under your touch, as he shivers as your fingers run through his hair before tugging, “are you ready for that?” 

“Yes, baby,” he’s biting his lip, fingers twitching wanting to touch you. 

Your lips curl, “Good boy.” 

“All that big talk and now look at you, Toru,” Satoru’s white knuckled fingers fisted at the sheets of your shared bed, as your own fingers teased the head of his leaking cock through his boxers, “such a mess for me,” 

You kneel at the foot of your bed, settled between his thighs, and though you were on your knees, you were the one who held the power. Fingers tracing the trigger right within your grasp, his cock twitching against your hand. 

“Please, sweetheart, fuck,” he’s hissing when your lips lean down to press a kiss to his clothes weeping slit, the wet heat of your mouth seeps through, making him twitch against your touch — a spark of need that burns against his skin and boils his blood underneath with need, “please, don’t tease me,” 

“Well that’s not fair,” you hum, as your fingers toy with the elastic of his boxers, snapping the elastic against your skin, sending a shiver up his body along with an ache that reaches his bones — and he wondered how he had let your grip on him grow this deep — and how he had ever let it go when it felt this good, “when you’re being teased I’m supposed to relent, even though you made me cum downstairs in my entryway?” 

And he’s swallowing thickly, Adam’s apple bobbing just as anticipatory as the rest of his body, a bow string drawn tight just waiting for you to release it. But you wished to toy with the arrow more. 

“I have half a mind to make you clean my cum off the floor with your tongue,” you click your own tongue as a taunt, but that only makes him squirm, “but maybe I’ll spare you since you’re being so good for me,” you’re dragging your fingers down his boxers, freeing his cock— already far too hard, flushed and dripping with precum as it slaps against his stomach, the flared head nearly begging you to touch it, “tell me what you want,” his cock is far too gorgeous, you thought that from the first time you saw it  — long and curved, and the veins that ran along it were so pretty— just like the man himself. 

And a whimper escapes his lips, “sweetheart, please, touch me—“ 

“With what?” you thumb his tip lightly, smearing the cum down his shaft, “my fingers? Or my mouth,” and your lips lick the pre that clings to your thumb clean, dragging your thumb down the flat of your tongue. 

“Y-Your mouth,” and you’re smiling, your lips curling as his pretty gaze pleads with you, “please,” 

“Imagine your subordinates saw you like this, begging your ex-wife to blow you, nearly ready to blow your load already just from fingering me,” your fingers toy with his balls, while you leans down to trace the tip of his tongue up the bottom of his cock, “what do you think they’d say?” And your lips part to let his engorged tip enter, as his head falls back with a groan, the wet and warm mouth, as you start to bob your head up and down his length. 

“Fuuuuck, pretty,” and you’re pausing as you wait for a reply to your question, his own tongue tying itself in knots, “think I’m down bad for my wife,” he’s grunting, the words ‘my wife’ and his groans sending white hot arousal to your needy cunt, “think I’d let her fuck me anyway she wants and they would be right, sweets. I’d let you use me,” your tongue is wrapped around his length, as his dick sinks deeper into your mouth, nose brushing against his pubes, his hips held taut as he forces himself not to face fuck you. 

And his eyes flutter down to meet yours, only to find your eyes drowning in lust, molten with need that nearly burned him with want, lips sloppy and dripping with a mix of precum and your spit out of the corners of your mouth, and your fingers —buried deep in your cunt as you sucked him off. 

Fuck. 

With the nasty way you slurped at his length, the noise ringing in his ear as your fingers begin to squeeze and stroke his balls, he wasn’t going to last much longer. His hips bucked against your mouth, and he’s muttering apologies but you let him, moaning as his tip hits the back of your throat. 

“I’m close—where—“ and you’re sucking hard, tongue flicking against his slit and when he fucks your mouth once, twice — he’s gone. He’s cumming down your throat, hot spurts of cum painting your lips and mouth, his head falls back, fingers gripping the sheets as his eyes flutter open. And he watches you pull away from his cock, sticky strings of cum and saliva connecting you to his length still, “fuck, sweetheart,” his softening dick already twitching at the sight of you — your pretty tongue darting out to lick his cum from your lips. 

“You taste as good as I remember, Toru — always so sweet,” and you’re pulling your own fingers from inside your tight pussy, and he snaps. 

You’re on your back on the bed now, flopped down against the mattress as his hand closes around your wrist of the hand that was just inside you. Your words are lodged in your throat but come out a shiver when he brings your soaked fingers to his lips, he kisses each one before sucking and licking them clean. 

“Toru—“ and he pulls away from the last finger with a pop, eyes clouded with need, “I—“ 

“And you say I taste good?” he’s humming, as he leans over you, “wait until you taste yourself, Princess,” and his mouth is insistent on giving you an entire course of your taste on his tongue, mapping out a detailed cartography of very crook and crevice of your mouth, “aren’t you so much sweeter?” He’s pulling away from your bitten red lips, spit connecting your lips still, “and that taste is all mine, just like you, wifey,” 

The pet name sends a fresh wave of desire coursing through your veins, stoking the burning need already threatening to consume you both, “Toru—“ and he’s already stripping your dress away, pulled away up and over your head, thrown away like every thought of why this was a bad idea. Your nipples perk in the cool air of your bedroom and under his hot gaze, standing at attention as if they’re begging for his attention. And he’s more than happy to oblige. 

His fingers toy with the buds, rolling between your forefinger and thumb, until he’s bending down to take one in his mouth, and you’re arching into his touch, your fingers finding purchase on his shoulders. 

“Bet Atsuya would love to see you like this, huh?” He’s switching to the other side, teeth dragging against your nipple to draw a gasp from your lips, “Would love to see you such a mess like this, spread out and needy,” and he’s spreading you with warm palms, his half hard cock brushing against your thigh, “Were you gonna let him fuck you on this bed? Our bed?” 

He doesn’t allow you an answer as his fingers spread your dripping walls, “Gonna let him taste you like this?” His lips warm your fluttering pussy, nearly begging for his touch and to swallow you whole, “when I already said this pretty cunt was mine,” he clicks his tongue far too close, making you whine, “g’nna have to answer my question first, Princess,” 

“No, I wouldn’t,” and he presses a chaste kiss to your dripping pussy, making you whimper, your walls spasming around nothing, “Toru,” 

“Remember when we moved into this home?” his lips are teasing your inner thigh, teeth dragging against your hot skin, “we broke the bed in all night long,” he’s looking up through half lidded eyes, “think he could please you like that? Make you moan his name?” 

And you’re growing desperate as his lips draw close to your clit, tongue dragging against it, only to pull away to your thighs again, “no, no, only you, Toru, please—“ 

“Only I what?” oh you know he’s goading you, but your want is drawn taut like a stringed instrument, tweaking your strings when you’re dying for him to play you — “c’mon sweetheart,” 

“Only you make me feel this good — fuck, Toru, I swear to god—“ your head falls back into the pillow as his face buries itself in your cunt, his laugh vibrates against your walls, pleasure rising faster than smoke from a burning building. His fingers dig into your hips as he holds you in place now, settled between your legs. 

“You swear to me what?” and you swear his god complex gets worse and worse, and the way you moaned with his head between your legs wasn’t helping, “sorry, Princess, I have my mouth full,” and his tongue as silver as his words were, parting your folds with ease, as his lips slurped at your folds messily. 

Fuck, he was too good at it, and he knew it, smirk on his lips as the wet, nasty noises of his mouth wrapped around your cunt and your bordering pornographic moans filled the silence. Pleasure ribboned up your body, mixing with the sharpness of his fingers pressed against your plush thighs to keep you in place. 

“Gonna make me cum before I even fuck you, Princess,” and you hear the telltale squelch of his hand around his weeping dick — the shudder of your groan making him moan all the same, “taste so fucking good, never gonna go a night without tasting you again,” he murmurs far too reverently with his tongue dipping back into your folds for more of your juices, “you know how many times I fucked my fist to the thought of eating you out again? Never gonna spend a second without burying myself in this cunt,” 

“Toru, I’m close—“ and you are, greedy tongue flitting over your clit, his nose bumping against his folds, and the practiced ease of his touch — he knew just what to do to make you cum. And he did, his mouth closing around your clit, before sucking harshly. 

You cum on his face, swallowing your slick with the thrust of a desert weary man, his eagerness apparent on his soaked face, as you finally came down your high. He doesn’t waste a drop, only pulling away with a pop when your orgasm ebbs away, licking his lips clean of your juices. 

“Still dripping even after I licked you clean?” He clicks his tongue as he watches your slick soak the sheet, “gonna have to find another way, maybe you need something bigger,” he hums in fake contemplation, “what can we use?” 

“I have some sex toys that might do the trick,” and he scoffs, as he kisses up your body, before pressing his hard erection against your thigh. 

“Don’t think any toy you have compares to me,” and you’re gasping as he drags the head of his cock against your puffy clit, “nothing can fill you up like I can,” and he groans as he watches your releases mix, “just for that, g’nna make you beg for it,” 

“Toru,” you’re whining, but he’s only teasing your entrance with the head of his dick, your walls fluttering, already begging for him to sink into you, but he’s waiting for your mouth to do the same, “please, fuck me, I need you inside—“ 

He grins, “Well how can I deny my pretty wife when she asks so nicely?” And he’s splitting you open with his thick cock, balls deep with only a thrust of his hips. Your hands are grasping at him for purchase, needing to hold onto him as his cock stretches your walls out. It’s as if you remember him, walls sliding to accommodate him as they always did, but clinging to him desperately, a grunt parting his lips, as if they never wanted him to leave again. And you didn’t. 

“So fucking tight, Princess,” he’s groaning in your ear, a swallow roll of his hips drawing a chorus of moans from both of you, “don’t have to break my dick off to keep it — I’ll take you anytime you want,” and he’s pressing your thighs forward, slinging one over his shoulder, as he presses himself even deeper. 

A whine leaves the back of your throat, “too deep, Toru,” and his cock twitches inside you at that, “fuck,” and it takes everything in him not to blow his load there and then, 

“You love it when I fuck you like this, Princess, or do I have to remind you?” And he does, beginning to piston in and out, the lewd slaps of skin and moans filling the air of your bedroom, “be careful or our daughter might wake from the sounds of her mommy getting fucked,” he clicks his tongue, “maybe we should give her another sibling?” He’s watching the way your cunt eagerly welcomes his cock, sinking in and out with ease, “fuck another baby into you, hm? Would you like that princess?” 

“Toru, ngh,” your walls flutter at the thought of a kid, of his seed filling you up, “please—more—“ 

He gives a chuckle, “I’ll give you everything, sweetheart — fuck you so full that you’ll be dripping with my seed for days,” he’s grunting, legs trembling as his thrusts grow more sloppy as his orgasm begins to build, “fuck, you feel so good for me, “gonna give you another baby, make sure everyone knows you’re mine, my wife—“ 

“G’nna cum, Toru,” you’re falling back against the mattress, as he bends down to press a messy kiss to your lips, all tongue and teeth, before his fingers reach down to rub at your clit. Your eyes finding his, face flushed a pretty pink, eyes shrouded in a deep lust that was reserved only for you, and as he bucks into you even deeper, he brushes against that spongy spot that has the taut string snapping as you fall apart. 

“Cum on my cock, sweetheart,” he’s grunting, as he grazes teeth along your neck before biting. And you cum hard, toes curling as your mouth falls open with only moans of his name on your lips. The way your walls squeeze around him has him only rutting into you harder, deeper, messier — as he watches the ring of cum pool around the base of his cock, fucking you through your orgasm, “g’nna cum—“ and you’re pulling him into another kiss, legs wrapped around him as he falls over the edge with you. Hot cum spills in ropes inside your walls, his hips rolling as he does, if only to fuck his cum deeper inside you. 

“Toru, s’good, I—“ you’re incoherent nearly under him, soft kisses pressed along your jaw as you both come down from your highs, cock softening inside you only him to pull out, another groan of your name on his lips when he watches his cum drip from inside you, staining your thighs along with the sheets. 

And you whimper when he’s gathering his spilled cum on two fingers only to push it back inside, “can’t let you waste a drop, can we, sweetheart?” 

He’s finally pulling away, his other hand cupping your cheek, as he finds your lips in a lazy but far too sweet kiss, “Toru,” you mumble, “I never stopped loving you, because I don’t think I ever could,” 

His eyes grow glassy, his fingers finding the back of your neck, “I know nothing I’ll do will make up for what I did — to you and Satomi, but,” he presses his forehead to yours, “if you both let me, I’ll spend the rest of my life trying to make it up to you,” 

And tears burn at the corners of your eyes, “Just stay with us, and promise to never leave — that’s enough,” and your lips brush his, “you’re more than enough for us, Satoru,” and he kisses you again and again and again, nearly climbing on top of you again, when you both hear a tiny gasp from the door. 

Your heads both snap over to your baby daughter leaning against the door, badly hidden behind it, as she pokes her head in, “did mommy and daddy make up?” 

Your cheeks burn as you cover your face — you both had checked on Satomi before but she was fast asleep still, and now — you checked the time — 9:30 PM, you were sure she’d be up all night. 

“Yes baby, mommy and daddy had some stuff to talk about,” Satoru grabs your robe for you, handing it over as he pulls his discarded boxers on under the sheets, “come here,” and she squeals as she runs into her daddy’s arms, Satoru scoops her up before pressing kisses all over her face, her giggles and his grin nearly too much for you. 

“Now she’s gonna be up all night,” you murmur to Satoru, and he’s smiling. 

“I can tire her out,” he grins, and then he adds with a whisper, “and then I’ll tire you out,” and you flush, shoving him playfully, “come on, my love, let’s go play for a while and let mama rest,” and he’s sliding out of bed, carrying her out of the bedroom, and you watch him, lying on your side, with a smile on your lips.  

Maybe it wasn’t so bad having a husband — especially when it was Satoru Gojo. 

Satoru lets you and Satomi sleep in the next morning, making a smoothie for himself, as he starts to prepare breakfast. He did tire you both out last night, especially you — and you did some exhausting of your own, his fingers running over the hickies you left all over his neck and collarbone with a slight hum. He tied your apron on himself, only boxers and a sleeveless tee on. 

He started to crack eggs into a bowl with one hand. He wouldn’t make the same mistakes again — he meant what he said. He would make it up to you, or at least he would try — and he would spend the rest of his life treasuring you and his kid — and maybe another if you let him have his way, he thought, biting back a grin. 

You had turned him down last night when he asked, 

“Don’t you think it’s time we try for another one?” His arms are winding around you, half hard erection already pressing into you, as the two of you stood right outside your daughter’s doorway, watching the angel sleep, “we did do well with the first one,” 

“Toru, we just got back together, we’re not having another kid,” and he’s already pouting, you know without looking at him, “but that would be nice — for our daughter to have a sibling,” and god, it made him to take right there (which he did), but he couldn’t wait until all three of you were ready. Because he wouldn’t dare to miss a second of it — never again. 

And then a knock at the door pulls him from his thoughts, and his brow furrows. Who could it be this early?

He walks over, checking through the peephole, a grin growing on his lips, oh, perfect timing. Satoru opens the door, leaning against the doorframe, “Yes?” 

Atsuya Kusakabe frowns, jaw nearly dropping as he attempts not to gape at Satoru Gojo standing in his date’s doorway, nearly dropping the bag of medicine and soup he had packed up for you, “Uh, sorry, I was looking for—“ 

“My wife?” He raises a brow, and Kusakabe’s face blanches, as Satoru only smiles with a shrug, “sorry I should say ex-wife, we did get a divorce,” and Kusakabe’s mouth opens and closes, “but you know, she never stopped being mine,” 

Kusakabe clears his throat, rubbing the back of his neck, “where is—“ 

“She’s sleeping still,” Satoru’s lips curl, as he sighs, “she wasn’t feeling well yesterday, but I think I made her feel better last night,” and he’s rubbing the back of his neck, movement drawing his attention to your marks littering his body. 

A flush crawls up his neck and ears and he clears his throat, “I-I see,” he thrusts the bag into Satoru’s hands, “could you please give this to her and let her know—“ and he’s shaking his head, rubbing at his temples, “tell her whatever you want.” 

And he’s gone, door slamming behind him, click of the lock. He holds the bag behind him, only to walk forward to see you peeking from the bedroom, his button up shirt thrown over your head, as you rub your eyes,  “who was it?” 

He only smiles at you, dropping the bag in the trash, “No one important,” and he’s finding his way to your side, arms winding around your waist, “I made us breakfast,” 

“Oh really?” You hum, as he buries his face in the crook of your neck, pressing sweet kisses that only makes you sigh contently, “what’s the occasion?” 

“Oh, just the first day of the rest of our lives, nothing too big,” he hums, and you laugh, his favorite noise that only makes him fall deeper in love with you, if that was even possible, “have to treat you right don’t I, wifey?” 

“Yes, you do,” and your lips find his again, “my husband,” and the word sticks in his chest, a missing piece that fits right back into place, and fixes a hole that had been aching for far too long, “should we go wake up our daughter?” 

He presses a kiss to your forehead, “Together.” 

✧ a/n: so i didn't think i'd finish this week with being at my sister's and having a con this weekend but i found the time! i hope you enjoyed this one. this is my reality for gojo i'm living in :) fun fact, satomi and satoru both mean enlightenment! :)

✧ taglist: @jasminelee324 , @forest-hashira , @spider-fan72 ,, @rougebrainsludge , @theshylittleelfgirl , @ririchurl , @johannakhalafalla , @hanlay , @fawnlikelore , @vickkysthings , @dead-kats , @hantaslittlearsonist t , @being-me-is-not-a-sin , @augustwinesworld , @forest-fruits-jam , @kirashuu , @catsgomurp , @daddytojji , @notgoodforlife , @hyori2 , @shrimpy109 , @goddess-ofthe-godless , @i-spilt-ink-on-my-phone , @sunamatic , @rougebrainsludge , @redmangotango , , @psychxbby , @nakariabnrb , @mua-for-now @dazailover1900 , @alwaysfreakingout , @yamaguccitadashi , @equikaz , @gojosatorubrainrot

[vi-steponmeplease]

YOU'RE LOSING ME

pairings - overwhelmed!billie x caring!reader

genre - angst, fluff near the end

synopsis: billie returns from a week-long trip to korea, leading to an intense argument that threatens your relationship.

tw: slight emotional abuse, relationship conflict, reader and billie are in an established relationship, billie calls reader clingy

word count: 2.7K

and the air is thick with loss and indecision i know my pain is such an imposition

⟡

i gave you all my best me's, my endless empathy and all i did was bleed as i tried to be the bravest soldier

✩₊˚.⋆🕸️⋆⁺₊✧

As the first rays of sunlight stream through the curtains, you slowly open your eyes, your vision blurry for a few seconds as you gaze out the window. Extending your arm, you touch the empty spot on the sheets beside you—cold and untouched.

Your girlfriend Billie has been in Korea for what feels like forever, though it’s only been a week. Her long-awaited album just dropped, and she’s been consumed with interviews and appearances. She hasn’t been responding to your texts much, leaving you feeling lonely. Still, you remind yourself how hard she’s working and try not to let it bother you too much.

Pulling yourself out of bed, you shuffle to the bathroom, turning on the tap to run a warm bath. Back in your room, you grab the hoodie Billie gave you before she left. Her signature scent still lingers, drawing a small, bittersweet smile to your face as your chest tightens with longing. You slip it on over matching sweatpants, preparing for a strawberry-scented bath to shake off the ache of missing her.

Today’s the day Billie finally comes home. The thought brings a flicker of excitement, breaking through the gloom of the past week. You've been counting down the hours, longing for the moment you'd see her walk through the door, ready to wrap her in your arms. You’d planned everything—dinner, her favorite movie, and the kind of quiet, comforting night you know she loves.

You’ve spent the whole morning searching Instagram for recipes, carefully selecting her favorites. After your bath, you tie your hair up into a ponytail and get to work, letting the rhythmic hum of a Clairo playlist fill the air.

Two hours pass, and you’ve prepared mashed potatoes, a fresh salad, and a pot of pasta with vegan meatballs. The table is set, the living room prepared, and her favorite movie is paused on the TV.

At about 6 PM, the sound of keys jangling at the door makes your heart leap as you set two plates on the coffee table. You rush to greet her, a bright smile on your face as the door swings open. There she is—Billie, standing with her luggage in hand, looking as stunning as ever.

“Hey,” she says, her voice soft but distant, her expression tired.

“Hi, baby,” you reply warmly. “I missed you.”

“Me too,” she says, forcing a small smile. But there’s no hug, no kiss, no affectionate greeting. Your stomach knots at the coldness in her demeanor.

“How was your trip?”

“Busy. Lots of interviews.” Her tone is flat, almost disinterested as she runs a hand through her black hair.

“I made you dinner,” you say, stepping aside to reveal the table you’d prepared. The sight of her favorite dishes and the movie queued up for the night should’ve brought a smile to her face, but instead, she sighs, rubbing her forehead.

“That’s great, baby, but I think I’ll pass.”

Your smile falters, but you quickly push aside the sting, which is instantly overpowered by your care. Checking on her is one of your priorities, and you know her well. You two have been together for a year and a half, so by now, you can immediately tell when something's wrong. “Are you okay? You seem... off.”

“I’m just tired,” Billie mutters, avoiding your gaze.

“Well, we can relax on the couch, eat something, watch the movie—”

“I wanna be alone, Y/N,” she interrupts sharply. Her tone cuts through you, the weight of her words hitting harder than you expect. “You’re going to want to cuddle and... I’m just not in the mood.”

“Oh.” The hurt threatens to spill over, but you swallow it down. “I’m sorry.”

“No, don’t do that,” she snaps, crossing her arms as her piercing gaze meets your confused expression. “Don’t guilt-trip me like this.”

“I’m not trying to guilt-trip you,” you reply softly. “I just—”

“Just drop it, okay?” she says firmly.

You hesitate, but something inside you refuses to let it go. “Okay, no. You don’t get to treat me like this after I’ve spent all day trying to make things nice for you. I know you’re tired, but that doesn’t mean you can push me away.”

“I didn’t ask you to do any of this,” Billie says, gesturing dismissively at the table. “You’re the one who went overboard.”

“Because I care about you,” you argue, stepping closer. “Because I wanted to make you feel better after a long week. All I wanted was to spend some time together, but apparently, that’s too much to ask.”

Billie’s eyes narrow. “You’re being ridiculous.”

“Am I?” You throw your hands up in frustration. “You’ve barely answered my texts, you’ve been distant all week, and now you’re acting like I’m the problem for wanting to spend time with my girlfriend.”

You almost can't recognize the person in front of you. Is this why she'd been so cold lately? Usually, after long trips like this, she'd get extremely clingy, refusing to leave your side while repeatedly claiming how much she'd missed you and peppering your face with a billion kisses.

"I've been busy, Y/N. You can't expect me to be on my phone 24/7," she argues, a frustrated groan slipping out. "What, are you gonna strangle me for doing my job?"

"Billie," you resolutely call out as you cross your arms defensively. "When have I ever not been understanding to your circumstances? I know how hard you work, and I know your job means you gotta travel around the world. And I've always been okay with that."

She lets out a dry laugh, her tone dripping with exasperation. "So, why are you acting so goddamn needy right now?"

The word hits like a slap. She knows how much that word cuts you, how deeply it taps into your insecurities.

"Why are you being so unbearable right now?" you retort, matching the volume of her tone. Not yelling, but not calm either.

"Just stop it. You're making a big deal out of nothing—"

"No, I'm not. Stop trying to make me sound crazy."

You make your way to the kitchen and grab a glass cup from the dish rack, filling it up with cold water before taking a sip. Your throat had begun to to run dry since you haven't eaten or had anything to drink all day. "You could've been nicer about it. Why are you acting surprised and attacking me for wanting to spend time with you after a week apart?"

billie follows you and leans against the counter, feigning indifference as you stare at her from the other side of the kitchen, your eyes scorching with fury. "A week's not that long."

You scoff after setting the cup on the counter in front of you. "Yeah, says you who literally couldn't wait for me to come home after I slept over at my sister's house for two days."

"That's different." She rolls her eyes and prods her tongue against the inside of her cheek. The audacity leaves you speechless for a second before you regain your composure.

"What changed?" You shake your head in disbelief as you replay the memories of the sweet nothings she would whisper in your ear after being gone for so long. Whether she'd be gone on tour for a month, or if she'd just go visit her parents and Finneas for the weekend, she'd always return to you. "Why are you acting so weird?"

Billie lets out a pained sigh as she shuts her eyes tightly, hoping this moment would just disappear. This is the first time you've seen her show a single emotion other than apathy the whole time she's been back. "I think..." she trails off, not knowing how to correctly word the sentence on the tip of her tongue.

"You think what?" you ask, growing a little impatient as you watch her part her lips again.

"I can’t do this anymore,” she says, the words spilling out like venom. “I think we need a break.”

Your eyes widen and your jaw goes slack. "What the fuck?"

Rounding the corner of the counter, you gently reach out to hold her hands, but she withdraws herself and steps further away. The room seems to tilt as her words sink in. "Where the hell is this coming from?"

“I just... I can’t be in a relationship right now. It’s too much.”

Your voice breaks as tears blur your vision. “Billie, please. We can figure this out—”

“It’s not up to you,” she says, her tone colder than you’ve ever heard it.

“Don’t do this,” you plead. Never in a million years did you picture tonight ending this way, with you practically begging her to take you back.

She steps back, shaking her head, her emotionless blue orbs meet yours, damp and red. “I need space.”

"If you just listened when I told you to leave me alone earlier, this wouldn't be happening right now." Billie's voice rises, although she's never yelled at you before. Every time you two would argue, she'd still try her best to steer clear of doing or saying anything she might regret afterwards.

"Don't you fucking blame me," you yell back, your knuckles turning white as you tighten your grip on the edge of the counter. "I just wanted to spend the night with my girlfriend after being away from each other for so long. You're the one who—"

She lets out another humorless chuckle as she steps forward, leaning closer until your faces are mere inches apart. "Say one more fucking word and I'm never coming home again." She watches your furious expression falter as your eyebrows scrunch together, a crease forming in your forehead. You remain silent and that's when she pulls back. "That's what I fucking thought."

You lower your gaze as she moves out of your view, striding towards your shared bedroom. All you hear is the sound of her footsteps padding across the ceramic floor tiles and trailing further from where you helplessly stand, before you hear the door slam. The sound reverberates through the house, leaving you frozen in place.

Your reticence lingers for a few minutes, almost as if you're too afraid to utter a single word or she'd walk out on you. A quiet sob escapes your lips when your legs give out and you slump onto a stool, burying your face in your hands as the tears finally fall.

The food's cold. It's all you can think about.

The food you spent all of last night planning out, and most of today to make. It's cold. Untouched.

Her words from earlier hit you like cinder blocks. The weight of each sentence uttered makes your heart sink further into your chest as if it's been attached to an anchor.

Questions flood your mind, each one heavier than the last. What went wrong? Was it something you did? How long has she felt this way?

You sit there for hours, drowning in your thoughts, wondering if she’s lying awake like you are, or if she’s already moved on—emotionally gone from what once felt unbreakable.

This isn't something she'd ever normally do. Billie's the most gentle person, especially with you. She'd never do anything to hurt you.

Hues of red and orange begin to spill through the living room window, painting the walls with soft, warm light. You take a shaky breath, turning your head to the window. The sunrise is breathtakingly beautiful—an ironic contrast to the emotional storm you've just endured through one of the worst nights of your life.

You sniffle quietly, wiping away the lingering tears with the back of your hand, your lips trembling from the strain of holding back sobs.

In the bedroom, Billie sits on the edge of the bed, knees drawn to her chest as she stares blankly at the wall. The faint light of the bedside lamp reflects the glimmer of dried tears streaked across her cheeks. She hadn’t bothered to turn it off, too lost in her own thoughts. Her lips are pressed into a remorseful line, her usual confidence replaced with raw guilt. She knows she messed up—knows she acted ungrateful when all you wanted was her.

A heavy sigh escapes her as she swings her legs over the side of the bed, forcing herself to get up. Thirst claws at her throat, but so does the anxiety of facing you. Deep down, she half-expects you to be gone by now—out of the house and her life for good after everything she said. But as she shuffles into the living room, Billie’s breath catches when she sees you still there, perched on the same stool by the counter where she’d left you hours ago.

Her stomach twists as she takes in your figure: slouched shoulders, tired eyes, and the faint, broken sniffles that fill the otherwise silent space. Each sound cuts deeper into her chest. She hesitates for a moment, her hand twitching as she reaches out, wanting to comfort you, but unsure if she even deserves to. Slowly, she steps closer, finally giving in to the ache in her heart.

Tentatively, Billie wraps her arms around you from behind. You flinch slightly, startled by the touch, a quiet gasp escaping your lips. It's the last thing you expected.

“I’m so fucking sorry, baby. You have no idea,” she whispers, her voice thick with emotion. Her grip tightens as though afraid you might slip away. “I don’t know what got into me last night. I never should’ve yelled at you or called you needy. You just wanted to be with me, and I—I was awful. I’m sorry. There’s no excuse for what I did.”

Your chest heaves, struggling to regulate your breathing. You can’t bring yourself to speak, the lump in your throat too heavy. After a long beat of silence, Billie pulls back slightly, moving to face you. Gently, she tilts your chin up, her heart sinking when she sees the toll her words took on you—your puffy, tear-streaked face, trembling lips, and bloodshot eyes.

Her hands cup your cheeks, her thumbs brushing away the dampness. “I did this to you,” she says, her voice barely audible, as if scolding herself. “I made you cry.”

“Was I… too much?” you croak, your voice cracking. The question hangs in the air, fragile and weighted with insecurity. “Too clingy?”

Billie’s brows knit tightly, and she shakes her head vehemently. “No. Never. You’re never too much, love. I’m so sorry.” She rests her forehead against yours, her voice soft but firm. “I’ll never lash out at you like that again. I promise.”

“It’s seven,” you whisper hoarsely, your voice still trembling.

Her eyes widen slightly. “You spent all night here crying?”

You nod wordlessly, and she exhales shakily, guilt washing over her anew. Without hesitation, Billie takes your hands, guiding you off the stool. “Come on,” she murmurs gently, leading you back toward the bedroom. As the door shuts softly behind you, she repeats, “I’m so sorry.”

You chuckle faintly, the sound raw and tired. “You’ve said that a billion times.”

“And I’ll say it a trillion more if that’s what it takes,” she replies, her lips curving into a soft smile as she wraps her arms securely around your waist. Her tone grows tender. “I love you. You’re never, ever too much for me.”

The warmth of her words soothes your aching heart, though the memory of the night still lingers. “You said you wanted a break,” you remind her, your voice a fragile whisper.

“I don’t,” she says quickly, her gaze earnest. “I was overwhelmed and stressed with everything. I shouldn’t have taken it out on you. That’s on me.” Her fingers gently tuck a stray strand of hair behind your ear, her touch featherlight. “But I don’t want a break. I want you. I'm sor—"

You shake your head, letting out a fragile laugh. “If you apologize again, I swear—”

Billie cuts you off with a soft, passionate kiss, pouring every ounce of regret and love into the moment. Your hands instinctively move to her shoulders, pulling her closer, grounding yourself in her warmth.

When she finally pulls away, she rests her forehead against yours, her blue eyes shining with affection and sincerity. “Let’s get some sleep, baby,” she whispers, her voice like a balm to your soul.

And for the first time that night, you feel the weight on your chest begin to lift.

[ninisdollie]

Sad girl - Sim Jake 𓈒ིུ ❤︎ ˖ ݁

"In which reader is stuck being the side chick of an older, rich man, but she convinces herself that she likes it that way"

content: +18MDNI fem!reader x jake, older man!jake x younger!reader (both over 20, not age specified) kind of angsty, cheating plot, protected sex, dirty talking, oral sex (m recieving) fingering, corruption kink, humiliation, jake is kind of an asshole in this i’m sorry, reader is kinda dumb

i do not intend to normalize cheating with this story! i was just inspired by one of my fav lana del rey songs, entertainment purposes only <3

You stared at your phone, eyes sticked to the screen, your body laying down on your bed. You watched the time, 5:50, just ten more minutes and you could call him.

If someone had told you years ago that you would be involved in an affair with a married man, you would’ve laughed straight to their faces. You always hated those type of girls, who didn’t care about destroying couples by sleeping with taken men, you thought it was the most shameless, heartless thing to do.

Until you met him.

Jake Sim was the man of your dreams. A successful, renowned business man, Ceo of his own company, born into a wealthy family, impeccable physique, always wearing entire suits that fitted his body like a second skin, all costume made by the best designers in the country. He walked with so much confidence, posture always perfect, silver rings from the most expensive jewerly houses decorating his long fingers, and obviously, his wedding ring.

You didn’t know he was married when you first saw him (that gave no one comfort but you, he would always say) but when you found out you were so deeply in love that you didn’t really care, you were okay with having him, just a few hours a week, for yourself, pretending that you were his wife, that he was choosing you, even if that was far from being true.

Your relationship was weird, complicated, stritc rules applied. You would meet once a week, when his wife went to visit her family away from town until the next day, never outside of this schedule. He would always pick you up, but never before 6:00 pm, he was a busy man after all. You had to be always looking pretty, dolled up for him, he hated girls that didn’t take care of themselves, so he would always buy you the best dresses and make up, but obviously, you could only wear them for him, nobody else. You could never, never text him first, you always had to wait for his message, and he demanded you to delete everything after your encounters were over. You could call him when you were ready, but again, never before 6:00 pm, and you must never make him wait for you outside for more than 5 minutes.

Maybe it was a little bit extreme, but you understood, he had a reputation to keep clean, his career would be over if this ever came to light, and you were perfectly fine with any rules if that meant you could keep seeing each other.

Every week you would wait for the day to come, daydreaming about him in class, not being able to focus. He was your everything.

You just wished you were his too.

6:00 pm. You tapped on his contact, the tone ringing in your ear.

One, two, three rings later, he answered.

“Always so on time, my pretty girl” And you smiled widely at the sound of his voice, his beautiful Australian accent sending shivers down your spine, feeling the flush in your cheeks, getting up from your bed.

“I’m ready, Jakey. Will you be here soon?” Your voice always sounded extra cloy and high pitched when you talked to him.

He hummed on the phone, and you bit your lip, your heart pounding on your chest with anticipation.

“On my way, baby, wait for me.”

He hung up, and you jumped accross your room to pack a few more things in your purse, your lip combo, your wallet, and condoms.

You looked at yourself in the mirror one last time, just making sure you were looking perfectly polished. Long hair resting on your waist, natural makeup decorating your delicate features, the white, lacy dress he bought the last time for you covering your body perfectly, you smiled at your reflexion, hoping he would like it, you couldn’t wait for him to shower you in compliments.

After exactly 5 minutes, a honk on your driveway. You walked through the door enthusiastically, running to the car and getting inside real quick, so your mother wouldn't ask many questions. He saw you approaching, his hair perfectly slicked back, his shirt rolled up to his elbows, no ring on his finger, he always took it off when you saw each other. He was the most handsome man you'd ever seen, such a beautiful, perfect face, his lips were thick, red, and he had the cutest smile ever. He always smelled so good, Sauvage Elixir by Dior, that was his signature perfume. You smiled at him, placing a little kiss on his lips.

"Hi Jakey, missed you so much" he smiled back at you as he started the car again, driving along the streets towards your usual hotel.

"How was class today, angel? You doing well? You know i appreciate you keeping up with your studies" and you nodded a few times, fixing the skirt of your dress and looking at the front.

"It was good, nothing much happened, i just couldn't wait to see you" He didn't respond, just humming quietly.

The car drive was short, you didn't talk much because to be honest, you never did. Jake said he preferred to keep feelings out of this affair, you two only meeting to do your thing, so he never asked you that much about your life, your conversations were usually shallow, and to be honest it was mostly you talking as he just nodded and hummed in response. Not because he was annoyed by you, but because he found your business immature, being much older than you and having real life problems. So you didn't talk to him about stupid things like gossip and issues with friends, because at the end, you knew he didn't really care that much.

As to the nature of your relationship, he never really gave you a reason to why he was cheating on his wife with you, you knew it was an arranged marriage, or something like it, but obviously he was lacking something, otherwise he wouldn’t be searching for it in you. He did told you though, that his wife was a complicated woman, terrible temper, and he made emphasis in that she would kill you both if she’d ever found out about your affair.

Other woman in your situation would feel used, humiliated. But for some reason you didn't care about that, it was good enough for you that he preferred you over his wife to satisfy his desires as a man. It made you feel good, powerful.

Silly you.

"Is that the dress i gave you last time? You look so gorgeous, princess". And you smiled widely, blushing, because his compliments meant everything to you.

Feeling your heart flutter again, you watched him pull over in the parking lot, and he got out of the car towards your door and opened it for you, immediately placing a hand around your waist, kissing softly behind your ear and you sighed at his closeness, not wanting him to ever let you go.

He walked you through the hallway, a silence full of complicity between you both, and you rested your head on his shoulder as the elevator went up to the last floor, the private suite waiting for you both. You reached for his hands, and smiled at yourself at the size difference, yours looking so small and delicate in comparision with his manly, veiny, thick hands.

Jake wasn’t very lovey-dovey to you, he just wasn’t like that, he didn’t act like a boyfriend, and you didn’t mind, because you knew loved touching you and noticing little details like those too.

"A drink?" he asked, heading towards the mini bar, once you were inside the room, and you nodded happily, sitting on the corner of the big, king sized bed.

He poured a glass of wine, whisky for him, and stretched his hand, you took the glass and sipped, feeling the hot alcohol burning your throat. Then he loosened his tie, closing his eyes as he cracked his neck, groaning quietly, this made your skin jump, the sound of his voice was enough to affect you.

"Had an awful day at the office today, fired a bunch of useless idiots." He sighed deeply, and you pouted, placing the glass over the nightstand, running your delicate hands through his torso, up to his broad shoulders, squeezing softly, massaging him.

"Sorry to hear that, hope you're not stressing too much" You talked with sweet voice, and he chuckled, grabbing your hand and placing a little kiss on your palm. Then he downed his drink at once.

"You will help me with that." You grinned as he leaned in, hand on your chin, crashing his lips with yours.

The thing with Jake is that he kissed you differently than boys your age. Hungrily, deeply, dirty, messy, as if he was an starved man. Warm, wet tongue exploring your mouth and teeth pulling your lower lip, it made you whimper below his, hot breaths colliding. He always tasted like cigarettes and whisky, his perfume's scent invading the air and going straight through your lungs, you loved it. It was addictive. As he tangled his tongue with yours, head tilted, his big, manly hands ran through your body, firstly caressing the soft, always shaved skin of your thighs, lifting the skirt of the dress you wore only for him, then going straight to your ass, squeezing, groping, and you moaned breathles as you fell onto the bed on your back.

He leaned over your body, between your legs, dress now pooled around your waist, your delicate, lacy lingerie in display, his hands now tracing around your inner thighs, and you whimpered again, lifting your hips, needing more of his touch, your skin starting to burn hot beneath his fingers.

"Always so fucking needy." he whispered with thick voice, his lips now lowering along your jaw, then your neck, sucking, licking, and you tilted your head so he could have more access. "Fucked you a thousand times now and you still beg for my touch so pathetically".

You bit your lip, moaning as his hands now rubbed your core above the fabric of your underwear, two fingers in your clit, rubbing, softly, tracing circles, and you couldn't help but arch your back desperately, already soaking wet as the jolt of pleasure went down straight to where his touch was, he always got you so worked up this fast, you couldn't resist it. His other hand went up to your chest, lifting your dress completely until your bare breasts bounced out of it, nipples hardening as the cold air hit your skin. He cupped them with his hands, squeezing softly, face now buried in them, kissing, sucking, licking, and you leaned to his touch as you gasped.

It was as if he knew your body perfectly, where to touch, where to kiss, where to suck, it made you twitch and tremble so easily, no other man had ever made you feel like that.

He stood up in front of you, unbuttoning his shirt with one hand, the other traveling back down to your clother pussy, and you opened your legs wider, sluttier. He grinned, biting his lip.

"Oh, my little angel is feeling slutty today?" He chuckled thickly, slapping you above the clothes, and you jumped in your place, whining with broken voice. "C'mon, show me how bad you want it".

He let his shirt fell onto the ground, chest now bare in front of you, you could never get tired of him, his well maintained body, how the lines of his abs glistened beneath the faint light of the room, and you squirmed on the bed, shaky, clumsy hands running through your body until your fingers touched the lace of your underwear, and you pulled, leaving yourself exposed, swollen, needy, dripping pussy right in front of his eyes. His lips curved into a smirk, his eyes shining filled with lust and hunger. Jake lifted his chin, a silent order.

Looking straight at him through your hazy view, you rubbed yourself, spreading your folds and wetness all around your core, showing him how much you needed him right now. You whimpered, bringing your own soaked digits to your watery mouth, licking yourself clean, tasting your own arousal, and he slapped your thigh, hissing between his teeth. You bit your lip, your thin fingers now covered in your own spit, and you shoved two of them inside of you, arching your back and moaning his name high pitched, touching yourself in front of him, legs spread all the way, pussy swallowing and pulsing and clenching around your fingers as you thrusted them in and out of you.

"Fuck, such a dirty little slut." He whispered, and you nodded tremblingly, pathetic.

You saw him unbuckle his belt as his pants fell onto the floor along with his boxers, his thick, hard-rock, veiny cock in front of you, tip swollen and red and dripping with precum, he stroked himself as you kept your movements in and out of you, whining, telling him you needed him now.

"J-Jakey please, need you so bad..." Your voice was weak, begging.

"Shut up, not yet, whore." He grabbed your wrist with force, making you stop touching yourself. He was being extra mean today, you didn’t mind, you loved it. His rough voice speaked to you precisely. "Knees."

You obeyed almost immediately, even if your legs were shaking and you could barely keep balance, you fell onto your knees on the floor in front of him, his grip now sticked to your hair, strong, hurtful. You glanced at him from below, cheeks red, eyes sparkly, and he lifted his chin again. You looked at his throbbing, thick length in front of your face, and you wrapped your hand around it, not wasting time in sticking your tongue out and tracing circles on the head of his dick, whining at the salty tasted making contact with your taste buds, and you took a deep breath before loosening your jaw, taking him deep in your mouth until he reached your throat, and you sniffed, suppressing a gag, eyes watering. You loved feeling him in your mouth, the taste of his flesh, big, hard as you bobbed your head enthusiastically, taking him out and in again with ease. You've gained enough experience at this point, thanks to him.

"Fuck, such a perfect little mouth." He said between his teeth, sighing deeply as he watched how his member disappeared inside of your warm, wet mouth.

Then his veiny hand reached for you throat, and you choked around him as he tightened his grip, the cold silver of his rings pinching your skin, throat closing around his length, and he thrusted his hips. Your heart pounded faster on your chest, your lungs desperately looking for air, your face turned red as you felt the wet, warm, salty tears falling down your cheeks, and you shut your eyes as he face-fucked you at a strong, selfish pace.

“So fucking beautiful, crying as you choke around me. My good girl”. He praised and you whined around him, rubbing yourself against your toe, desperate for some friction.

He saw this and pulled back, taking his cock out of your mouth as you gasped for air loudly, sniffing through your nose, chest going up and down, vision hazy. He gave you a few seconds, eyebrow raised, like mocking you, but he kept his hand under your chin, thumb caressing you as you caught your breath. Then he thrusted again, deep, to the back of your throat, and you gagged around him, spit falling from the corners of your lips down your neck and to the floor, it was a mess.

Jake wasn’t very loud, but you knew the expression on his face when he was close. His jaw clenched, his eyebrows frowned, low, thick hisses between his teeth, his movements erratic, the grip on your hair getting tighter minute by minute.

You felt it then, warm discharge down your throat, and you coughed pathetically, swallowing most of it. He cupped your face and kissed you deeply, wiping your tears with his thumbs, his touch sweet, making you tremble and whimper above his plushed lips.

Then he lifted you with ease, making you fall onto the bed again, face now buried in the sheets.

“Lift your ass, babygirl.”

And you did, shakily leaning on your elbows you arched your back and lifted your hips towards him, perfectly curving your body just how you knew he liked it, chest against the white sheets as he grabbed your waist and you felt his weight sinking into the mattress, heavy, strong. The anticipation, the need, the desire were killing you, your aching pussy needing to be filled, leaking until it was dripping in your inner thighs.

Then you heard him unwrapping the condom, and you moved your hips side to side, an invitation to take you now, glancing at him over your shoulder, you fluttered your eyelashes with fake innocence.

“Don’t give me those big slutty eyes or i will fuck you all night until you fucking pass out.” Punishment or reward, you thought. You knew how to get him too, after all, he had a thing for ruining your much younger, naive being.

He put on the condom, kneeling behind you and grabbing your hips, you sighed, shutting your eyes as he marked his fingers on your skin.

“Please Jakey… can’t take it anymore, just fuck me please.” Your voice was broken, you just needed him inside of you.

Jake chuckled, mocking you, rubbing the head of his cock between your soaked folds, one, two times, teasing you, and you felt your thighs twitching, trembling, needy. Finally, after a few seconds, he slid inside of you, stretching your walls and making you sob as you grabbed the sheets in your fists, and your entire body shivered, pleasure taking you over once he started thrusting, hard, fast, deep.

“Shit baby, always so fucking tight and perfect no matter how many times i’ve fucked you.” His hand reached for your hair again, and he pulled so you arched your back even more, you moaning once he started fucking you so raw, so selfishly.

The skin of his thighs crashed with your asscheeks as he rocked his hips, the obscene sound combined with your broken moans and his low groans, you loved when he fucked you like this, as if you were his personal doll for him to use as he pleased, so you could only scream and sob his name asking him to please go faster.

“Slutty pussy so perfect around me, fuck.” He leaned down to whisper in your ear, and you whined in response, your pussy clenching around him, giving you away, and he bit your ear lobe, hot breath as he chuckled, slightly breathless “You like that, yeah? You like being my personal slut, not giving a fuck about the fact that i’m married. You are so dirty.”

“F-Feels so good, don’t care, Jakey, wanna be your side chick forever…” He slapped your ass with his palm and the rings on his fingers stinged your sensitive skin, and you screamed high pitched as his thrusts became rougher.

“My pretty dumb slut.” He placed kisses down your back, not stopping his movements.

Then he pulled out and you were about to let out a cry at the empty feeling, but he flipped you over, back now resting on the mattress facing him. His eyes studied your face with a dark look in them, his hair was now messy and sweaty, and he grabbed your legs so you could place them around his neck, and thrusted inside of you again, the new position making him go deeper until you could feel him in every inch of your insides, and you screamed again. It felt so good when he fucked you like this and folded your body as if it was a feather, you turning into a broken mess. Teeth bit your thighs as he slammed his cock into your g-spot over and over, making you see stars, feeling as if your soul was leaving your wrecked, used body.

“Fuck, look how you swallow my cock baby, so fucking good.” His thumb went straight to you clit, rubbing, precise circles that made you whine and gasp, new tears falling down your red, flushed cheeks. “Will never get tired of how twisted your pretty face gets when i’m fucking you.”

“J-Jake, please…” Your voice wasn’t even the same anymore, just pure begging, weeping in it, and he grabbed your chin, attacking your lips agressively.

“You wanna cum, baby? You’re gonna cum all over my cock like the good slut you are?” You nodded desperately, the tension in your lower belly starting to build.

Skins crashed as his heavy weight fell over you in erratic, rough, messy thrusts, and you knew he was close too. His thumb kept rubbing your swollen clit, other hand gripped aroung your thigh until it was red and marked.

“Do it, cum for me, show me how good of a whore you are.” His hand now wrapped around your throat, depriving you from air and you opened your mouth as he spat, you choked on it, gasping loudly.

You came hard, crying, your whole body twitching, your back arched, and your pussy clenched around him so good, the orgasm taking you over in an unnatural way, your eyes rolled to the back of your head, as the most obscene, pornographic scream left your mouth.

“Yeah, that’s it, fucking whore.”

Then he came too, filling up the condom inside of you with his cum, guttural groan leaving his throat, the veins on his neck showing up, his head thrown back. Jake thrusted his hips a few more times, prolonging his orgasm, now moving a little weaker.

He pulled out with a pop, and you closed your eyes as you tried to catch your breath and see clear again, feeling his body falling by your side. A hand reached for your waist, and brought you closer, you smiled as you closed your eyes and layed on his chest, warm, sticky skins together. His heart was racing too, and he placed a little kiss on your head.

You stayed like that for a while, silent, your pussy sore and pulsing, sensitive because of the strong orgasm.

His phone buzzed on the nightstand, and he stretched his body over yours to take it on his hand, reading the message, no expression on his face. You didn’t ask, because it wasn’t your business, so you closed your eyes again, while his fingers traced circles on your lower back, fingers moving accross the screen as he replied back. You placed your chin on his chest, looking up at him, and he glanced at you from his phone, smiling softly.

After a few seconds, you broke the silence.

“I was thinking next week maybe we could order room service first?” You asked, kissing across his chest, filling your lungs with his smell.

His face changed subtly, and he locked his phone before putting it back on the nightstand, running a hand through his hair, he let out an exasperated sigh, and you frowned your eyebrows. He seemed to hesitate, his fingers going from your back to your shoulders.

He swallowed.

“I forgot to tell you, baby. There will not be next time”.

Your heart stopped beating on your chest.

“W-What do you mean…” You asked, your voice really low, you just hoped he meant that he would be busy next week or that he had a business trip.

He sighed again, his hand squeezing your arm softly, like trying to comfort you for something you didn’t know yet.

“This is the last time we can see each other.”

You sat on the bed, trying to find your heartbeat on your chest, feeling dizzy suddenly. This couldn’t be happening, he just couldn’t drop you just like that. You didn’t even noticed you were crying until the tears wet your cheeks, and he sat too, bringing you close for a hug, but you pushed his chest, looking at him through your watery eyes.

“W-Why? Did i… Did i do something? You don’t like me anymore? Please Jake just tell me i’ll do anything—"

“It’s not that.” He cut you off, and you freezed. “I’m moving back to Australia.”

And then you laughed, but not because it was funny, because of disbelief. He was leaving the country, in less than a week, and he didn’t even had the courage or decency to tell you. You just weren’t that important to him, you were just what he said, a dumb, slut, side chick.

You sniffed, getting up and running a hand through your messy hair.

“Baby…”

“Don’t call me that, Jake. Are you being for real?” Your arms fell on your sides, and you stood in front of him, naked, you saw how his eyes scanned your body for just a fraction of a second. Bastard. “You’re telling me, we’ve been in an affair for months now, and you just couldn’t even tell me that you were leaving soon? That you would leave me here—"

“Leave you?” He raised an eyebrow, and you shut your lips, staying very, very still, your blood starting to boil as he was the one laughing now. “I’m married, y/n, and you knew that from the start, you are not my wife, and i’m not your husband, and we both are very conscious of that fact, we knew from the start that these wasn’t because we love each other so much. It was pure, physical lust.”

You swallowed, more tears.

And then in hit you, of course, how could you’d been so dumb. Of course you knew he wasn’t yours, of course you knew he had a wife and that he didn’t have feelings for you apart from lust and desire, and the morbidity that the nature of your encounters caused in him. You knew all of this. You weren’t a teenager, god.

But still, a very, small part deep in your heart really wished that he cared enough for you, even just a little bit.

You were just so fucking dumb.

“This relationship had benefits for both of us, you gave me something i lacked, i gave you something you lacked.”

You widened your eyes, really wanting to punch him right now. But a wave of shame showered your body, your whole being.

“And what the fuck is that supposed to mean? Are you calling me a whore now? I wasn’t with you because of your fucking patrimony!”

He stayed silent now, groaning as he grabbed his hair. He stared at you for a few seconds, and then streched his hand, holding yours, thumb rubbing softly.

“C’mon, get back in bed, let’s make the most of the time we have left.” He spoke softly, and you crossed your arms, feeling so ashamed.

“No.”

“Y/N…”

You sobbed again, now full crying in front of him, and he immediately got up, wrapping his arms around you and you hid your face on his chest, sniffing against his bare skin. That smell again, this was the last time you would feel it. He kissed your head, but it didn’t feel sweet now, it was mostly like he felt sorry for you. It made you sick.

“Just, know that i had a good time with you, princess. I really did, you made me forget all of the shitty things about my marriage and…”

You stepped back, wiping your own tears.

“Just don’t.”

A good time. Months being in love with him, wishing for him to text you, to go pick you up, to feel his touch, his kisses, to hear his voice. Months of you isolating yourself from any opportunity to have a healthy relationship with any other guy, to find what your heart truly desired.

He just called it a good time.

And your eyes opened, reality hit you right in the face. So you started getting dressed real quick, a numb look in your face.

He stayed there, just anylising you.

“What are you doing?”

“I wanna go home, please.”

One, two, three seconds of silence. He started getting dressed too.

You cried all the way back home, and he didn’t say a word to you, not even sorry, not even trying to explain himself. But who were you fooling, you weren’t the victim in this situation, you accepted this from the very beggining, never thinking of the consecuenses it might bring.

That was the last time that you saw Jake Sim.

Because the next morning, with eyes swollen from crying, vision hazy as you just woke up, the news hit you like a slap on your face when you opened your social media. And the tears came again once you read the headline.

“Jake Sim, famous Ceo, soon to be a father.”

[specific-dreamer]

thinking about there being a tension in the curtis house that’s been building for a few days and over dinner one night grouchily pony says “jesus darrel it’s like you hate us or something” and darry, who is so completely not here here bc he’s trying not to holler or do something he’ll regret, accidentally says “god if only” in the most wistful tone that has both his brothers snapping their necks to look at him

and soda, in a low voice that sounds like it’s taking everything in him to not panic, asks “what does that mean?”

eyes widening darry forces a laugh out and a fake smile that hardly reaches his cheeks let alone his eyes. “i didn’t mean to say that”

ponyboy waits, “but you did, so.” his voice is steady in the way that only a fresh teenagers could be; ready to be angry, better yet, ready to force his actual feelings down because it’ll be easier to hit and holler than feel upset. “what the heck does that mean”

there’s no escaping. he knows this, which might be part of why darry huffs through his nose and leans back in his chair. they’re silent for a moment as darry looks around; soda’s looking down at his plate, obviously having lost his appetite. the clock says it’s 6:36 pm, a later dinner than usual but eating dinner as a family isn’t a tradition that’s supposed to go away anytime soon. ponyboy’s doing his best to stare darry down, but darry knows his baby brother well enough to know that the kid’s staring into space in an ill attempt to not feel anything.

unfortunately, he’s done the same thing too many times to be able to do it again tonight. “i’m not saying i do hate yall, i just think it’d be easier if i did.” and he probably shouldn’t add the next part, but it’s only fair to be honest. “at least that way i wouldn’t be working myself into a stupor for feeling guilty.”

“what are you guilty of?” soda asks in that same melancholy tone he’s been harboring all week.

darry doesn’t want to admit this, but he’s been having these dreams where he’s still in school and the boys aren’t anything more than an afterthought. if he’s truthful those are one of his favorite dreams because it’s the only time he ever wakes up with a smile.

but then, once he gets out the bed and starts getting ready for the day, reality sets in and he’s quickly disappointed. and then he gets those chest stabs that always come along with guilty feelings.

all because he felt disappointed. because shouldn’t he be waking up with a smile everyday since his brothers aren’t living in a foster home with random strangers? shouldn’t he be happy that he got to keep his brothers even if he had threw all his goals away? even if he did “throw it all away” he’s got them and that ought to count for something right?

“it’s not fair,” he ends. “it’d be a lot easier if i did hate yall because id be able to just walk away, guilt free. but that’s never gonna happen,” he adds. darry’s started collecting their plates before he catches sight of ponyboys quivering lip and the shininess of sodapops eyes. “because i don’t hate yall. i love you. both of you. and that ain’t never gonna change no matter how much i wish it on a bad day, hear?”

he feels that guilt creeping up again when pony gives him a look that he hasn’t seen since the kid was five years old and darry shoved him away to go play with the big kids. his eyes are all squinty and his mouth is frowned and he’s taking shallow breaths like it’s all he can do to keep from sobbing. “you promise?”

a quick glance tells him soda ain’t fairing no better. he’s got his head laid on the table, not even bothering to wipe the tears cascading down his face.

darry sighs and leaves the table to put the plates in the sink. turning the tap on he says, “you know, when you were born soda cried his eyes out.”

“really?”

“mhm. that christmas, he made me write santa asking to exchange you for a real pony.”

he can hear pony’s wet gasp and the distinct sound of someone’s chair getting kicked. “soda!”

“darrel!”

it takes everything in him not to laugh yet as he scrubs the plates. “yeah, he told mama he hated you and wasn’t gonna love you unless you became a real pony.”

“darry, you said you wouldn’t tell him-“

“it’s alright though,” he says when he turns around and sees the crestfallen look on ponyboy’s face. “cause i said the same thing when soda was born.”

“you did?” they ask at the same time.

“yeah, i followed daddy around everywhere right? and when they told me they were pregnant with soda, i said i didn’t want a brother because then i’d have to share daddy. fast forward, im holding a baby soda in my arms and i look at his tiny face and say ‘i didn’t want you’ then mama asked why and i said ‘cause i hate him!’ and you know what mama did?”

he’s never seen them both so silent and still, but they’re clearly enraptured by his story because neither make an attempt to answer. “she laughed right in my face. she laughed and she’d said ‘no you don’t. you can dislike him all you want, but sodapop is family and you don’t hate family.’ mama was right, of course. later that night daddy said he found me in the crib with soda, both of us knocked out but i had let you use my arm as a pillow.

and christmas day, pones, you spat up all over my new sweater and soda ‘bout laughed himself silly declaring he loved you and you were his new favorite.”

the plates are drying on the counter with darry takes his seat again. both the boys have shiny eyes but also have a small smile attempting to grow.

darry doesn’t mean half the shit he says when he’s feeling stuck. he’s changes his mind on things every second of every day, because this his first time being a real adult or a guardian, but the only thing he hasn’t changed his mind on is loving his brothers.

even though he wishes he were still in college, darry hasn’t for a second regretted loving them enough to give up his dreams to be their legal guardian and keep them all together.

sometimes he has to remind himself that he doesn’t regret it, and sometimes he has to remind them, but that’s alright. because at the end of the day, they’re all together. at the end of the day he’s got both his brothers and (if he takes the time to spray their perfume and cologne on their pillows) it’s almost like he’s still got his parents too

[hsunrry]

fairy lights // one shot

harry styles x fem!reader

summary: just some fluffy smut about y/n first time with Harry. based on this request.

|| masterlist ||

words: ~2,3k

warnings: smut18+, fluff, first time, fingering, oral (f receiving), protected sex, aftercare

a/n: i’m sorry if it’s kinda off, but i’m sick and i tried my best to post this today!

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he was probably the best what ever happened to you. you know each other since you were kids, but when you finally decided to try something more you just couldn’t be happier. for three months now you were officially together and a month ago you started the last year of high school with him. since you were a virgin and he was very aware of that, you two didn’t had sex just yet and he wanted to make sure you were completely ready for that. of course, you were doing such a stuff like oral etc, but when it was coming to something more you were just kind of scared. although, lately you were thinking about it and you were sure you wanted to take that step, so when you felt him wrapping his arms around you from behind when you were standing by your locker, you immediately smiled. “morning, sunshine.” he kissed the crook of your neck softly.

“morning, baby.” you turned around, looking up at him.

“you look very pretty, as always.” he whispered, leaning to kiss you. you smiled against his lips.

“thank you, all for you.” you whispered against his lips. he smiled back, pulling you into hug, holding you tightly against his chest. your cheek was pressed to it. “i was actually thinking about something…”

“oh yeah? what’s on your mind?” he pulled back slightly to look down at you, small smile playing on his lips as his eyes were full of curiosity.

“so…” you bite inside of your cheek while looking at him. “my dad surprised my mom with spa weekend and i thought you could keep me company when they’re out of town.” he grinned wide at your words.

“me and you alone in your house? for whole weekend?” he leaned to nuzzle his nose against yours. “sounds perfect to me.”

“and we could…” you started. “try, you know…”

“oh, you mean…” his eyes widened slightly as he caught your meaning. he swallowed hard. “are you sure, love? you know i don’t want to rush you or anything.” he said softly, even if excitement was sparkling in his eyes at the thought.

“i know, it’s the last thing you’d do.” you smiled. “but i think i’m ready.” he grinned, pulling you into another hug.

“i’m happy you feel that way.” he kissed the top of your head, whispering into your hair. “i love you so much.”

“i love you too.” he tilted your chin up to give your lips long kiss. when he pulled back he smiled. “so, when i should be at yours on friday?”

“6 pm?”

“6 pm it is. i’ll bring everything necessary, you don’t worry about anything, sunshine.” he caressed your cheek with his thumb. when friday comes you heard him knocking on your doors a little after 6 pm. you opened them with a smile. he was holding two shopping bags in one hand and his backpack with clothes in the other.

“hey, sunshine.” he leaned in to kiss you briefly before stepping inside. “i went for quick shopping.” you locked the doors behind him, looking at him curiously. he only smiled innocently, putting bags and backpack on the couch and pulling you into a hug. his hands went down to grab your ass. “you look absolutely gorgeous.” he murmured, leaning to kiss your neck. you tilted your head to the side to give him better access. after quick make out session you went to your room. everything was happening fast, but it wasn’t a problem with him. he grabbed small remote, turning on fairy lights that were attached to your walls. he turned off the main lights, approaching you and laid you down on your bed with him. you caressed his cheek when he hovered over you, making him nuzzle into your touch. “are you nervous, baby?”

“i guess not anymore, i trust you.” you smiled softly. “besides, we already did other stuff.” you shrugged. he chuckled softly.

“yes, but it’s different and i want to make sure you’re comfortable with everything.” he sat up slightly, looking at you with concern in his eyes. “i’ll go slow and we can stop at anytime, okay?” you nodded at his question. he smiled warmly at you and leaned down to kiss you slowly, his hands roaming over your body. he took his time exploring every inch of you, his touch gentle and tender. “you’re so beautiful, inside and out.”

“so are you baby, but i think you know that.” you smiled. he blushed slightly at your words. he started to kiss down your jaw, neck and collarbone, pausing to look up at you as his hands reached the hem of your t-shirt, seeking for silent permission. when you nodded, he slowly took it off you, revealing your naked breasts to him. his touch was reverent as he cupped them gently. he leaned down to kiss them.

“you’re perfect.” he murmured against your flesh. “i love you so much.” he said, looking up at you with love-filled eyes.

“i love you too.” you gripped the hem of his t-shirt. he sat up to allow you to take it off. he tossed it aside and leaned back down to kiss you, his hands roaming over your body, he slowly unbuttoned your jeans.

“is this okay?” he asked against your lips.

“it’s more than okay.” you smiled softly. he slowly slid your pants down your legs, tossing them aside. he paused to appreciate the view, his eyes filled with love and lust.

“you have no idea how much i want you right now.” he said softly, before leaning down to kiss your inner thighs gently. you were looking at him this whole time, feeling arousal spreading in your whole body. he kissed and licked your inner thighs, his breath hot against your skin. he looked up at you, his eyes burning with desire. “i need to taste you.” his voice trembling with need. you nodded with small smile. after he took off your panties he immediately dove between your legs, his tongue delving into your pussy, licking and sucking on your clit. he groaned against you. “fuck, you’re so sweet.” he mumbled into you, his fingers spreading your lips apart, so he could eat you out better. you moaned, your breath went heavier already. he continued, his tongue exploring every inch of you. he slid a finger inside of you, pumping in and out slowly. “how does it feel, my love?” his voice muffled as he added another finger, stretching you gently.

“so good, as always when you do it.” you gasped. your hand going into his hair to hold onto something. he smiled against you at your words, encouraged by your reaction. he started to thrust his fingers faster, curling them inside you to hit your g-spot. his tongue swirled around your clit, stimulating the sensitive bud. he added third finger, to prepare you better for his cock. your back arching at the sensation, making him growl. he continued to push his fingers for few more seconds, his mouth sucking on your wet folds. when he knew you were stretched nicely he withdrew his digits, kissing his way back your body to your lips. you kissed him back eagerly, your hands going to waistband of his pants. his hips pressing against you, begging you to touch him. he broke the kiss to quickly remove his pants and boxers, his hard cock sprang free. he stroked himself few times, reaching into the bag for box of condoms. he tore the wrapper with his teeth and rolled it onto his length. he settled between your legs, guiding his tip to your entrance. “are you completely sure, sunshine? remember that we can stop at any moment.” he caressed your cheek.

“i know, i’m ready.” you smiled, pecking his lips.

“it might be a little uncomfortable at first.” he smiled back at you and slowly started push forward, his face contorting with pleasure. he took his time, rocking his hips back and forth, making sure he wasn’t hurting you, until he was fully buried inside you. he paused, giving you time to adjust. you moaned at little sting at first, grabbing his forearm. he kissed you softly, his hips slowly pulling back and thrusting again. he set a slow rhythm, his hips rotating with each thrust to stimulate you more. “you feel so good, love.”

“fuck.” you gasped against his lips.” it feels good, so good.” he grinned at your words, increasing his pace, his hips snapping against yours. he buried his face into your neck, his breath hot against your skin.

“wrap your legs around my hips, sunshine.” he gasped against you, his voice muffled. you quickly did what he asked for, his one hand going to grab your butt. new angle allowed him to go even deeper. his lips found yours again, his tongue delving into your mouth as his body was pressing against your most sensitive places. your hands slid onto his back, making him shiver when your nails lightly grazed his back. he thrust into you slightly harder, his body tensing as his release neared. he reached between your bodies, his fingers finding your bundle of nerves and rubbing tight circles. “come with me, my love. squeeze me tight.”

“fuck, Harry.” you gasped, your head snapping back. his fingers quickened, pushing you closer to the edge as he groaned against you. “yes, oh god!” you cried out, clenching around his cock when you finished. your legs that were wrapped around him shook slightly. he let out low growl, his voice muffled against yours skin when he buried it into your neck. his movements stopped after few thrusts before stilling and emptying himself inside the condom. you were laying flush against each other, breathing heavy. he peppered soft kisses along your neck, his fingers tracing patterns on your back. he nuzzled his face into your chest, listening to your heartbeat.

“i love you, so much.”

“i love you too, so much.” you smiled, kissing the top of his hair. “i’m glad we did it, it really felt amazing.”

“it’s was perfect, just like you.” he looked up at you, his eyes filled with warmth and love. he slowly pulled out of you, making you squirm slightly. he disposed of the condom and came back to bed, pulling you into his arms. “how do you feel? sore?”

“no, not yet at least. we’ll see tomorrow.” you smiled and he chuckled softly at your words.

“how about taking a relaxing bath together, what do you think, sunshine?” he kissed your forehead few times. you looked up at him with a nod. he grinned, giving you quick peck on your lips. “i’ll run the bath then. you stay here and rest, i’ll come back for you in a moment.” you watched him go to ensuite bathroom. he returned few minutes later, the scent of lavender and vanilla filling the air. he scooped you up in his arms, cradling you against his bare chest. “the water is perfect. i put some scents and bubbles too. oh, and candles.”

“how am i so lucky?” you smiled. he smiled back, carrying you to the bathroom. he gently lowered you into the warm, bubbly water before slipping in behind you. he pulled your back against his chest, wrapping his arms around you.

“i’m the lucky one here. besides, you deserve all the love and romance in the world, my sunshine.” you leaned your head on his shoulder, smiling at his words. in response he nuzzled his face into your neck, his arms tightening around you. he reached for the washcloth and some body wash, lathering it up before he began to gently wash you. he started at your shoulders and worked his way down, his touch tender and loving.

“that’s nice.” you said quietly, relaxed in his arms. he hummed softly against your neck. he took extra care cleaning between your thighs.

“i just want to take care of you, my love.” he kissed your neck softly.

“you’re the sweetest, baby.” he smiled, his hands continuing their soothing motions on your skin. he turned your face towards his, capturing your lips in tender kiss.

“and you’re the most amazing woman in the world. i’m so happy i get to love you.”

“i’m so happy with you, Harry.” you smiled against his lips. “i feel like the luckiest woman in the world that i have you.” he deepened the kiss, his tongue caressing yours. he pulled you closer, his body reacting to yours even after you just made love. he broke the kiss, his forehead resting against yours.

“i feel the same way, my sunshine. we’re both lucky to have each other.” he traced your cheekbone with his thumb.

“i love you.” you whispered. he sighed contentedly.

“i love you so much, baby. so much.” he nuzzled into your neck. after you both walked out of the bathtub and put some clothes to comfortably sleep in, you went to laid by his side under the covers. he grabbed some snacks he bought from the bag and you turned on the tv that was attached in front of your bed to the wall, putting some netflix on.

“that’s perfect.” you whispered after few minutes of watching and eating. he grinned and leaned in to kiss you. his hand absently caressing your arm as the movie played.

“i love our movie nights. they’re one of my favourite things.” he pulled you closer.

“what’s the others then?” you chuckled softly.

“well, obviously making love to you is now here as well. and waking up next to you when we have a chance, hopefully every morning in the future. and hearing you laugh. and… yeah, pretty much everything that includes you.”

[enflixx]

Letters from Stanford - Jake Sim

summary: You and Jake always planned to go to college together at University of Melbourne. When acceptance letters arrive, joy fills the air… until a secret Stanford letter changes everything. As summer passes, love is tested, truths unravel, and promises are made with trembling hands. When the day finally comes to say goodbye, distance becomes your new reality, but love doesn’t leave so easily.

genre: angst, just a little fluff

warnings: kisses throughout the fic

word count: 3,323

You were sitting cross-legged at the bottom of Jake’s bedroom floor, controllers in hand, and eyes locked on the TV screen. The two of you had been building a massive lake house in Minecraft for the past hour, trying to distract yourselves from the anxiety gnawing at your insides.

Jake’s room was dimly lit, except for the glow of the screen and the fairy lights hanging lazily above his bed. His knee was bouncing. He hadn't stopped fidgeting for the past ten minutes.

“Okay,” he said suddenly, glancing at the clock. 6:59 PM. “It’s almost time.”

You dropped your controller, heart thudding. “Don’t say that.”

Jake scrambled off the floor and flopped onto the bed, patting the space beside him. “Come on. We said we’d do this together.”

You joined him, your shoulder brushing his as you both grabbed your phones. The moment the clock struck 7:00 PM, both your devices buzzed at once.

Jake sucked in a breath. “Ready?”

You nodded, your fingers trembling as you hovered over the “View Decision” button.

“Three,” he said.

“Two,” you whispered.

“One.”

You both tapped your screens.

University of Melbourne: Accepted.

Jake let out a choked sound next to you. “I got in—wait—you too?”

You turned your screen toward him with a breathless laugh. “I got in! OMG I got in!”

Jake grabbed your free hand and pulled you into the tightest hug, both of you nearly falling back against the pillows in a tangle of limbs and joy.

“We did it!” he shouted. “OMG, we actually did it!”

You were both laughing, spinning in your own little whirlwind of excitement. He kissed your cheek, your nose, your forehead, completely overflowing with joy.

“We’re going to Melbourne!” he grinned, forehead pressed to yours. “Together.”

“Together,” you echoed, barely believing it yourself.

Then Jake hopped off the bed, still grinning. “Hold that thought. I need to pee or I’m gonna explode.”

You laughed and nodded, watching him disappear into the hallway.

The door clicked shut.

You turned back to your phone, thumb hovering over the unopened Stanford email sitting quietly beneath the one from Melbourne.

You hesitated. Then tapped it.

Your heart thudded as you clicked “View Decision.”

Congratulations…

The word blurred for a second as your vision went watery. You blinked, staring at the screen in disbelief.

Stanford.

You hadn’t thought you’d get in. You’d applied on a whim, just to see.

And now here it was, real and glowing in front of you. A future you’d never seriously planned for now opened like a door you hadn’t realized was unlocked.

Your eyes welled with tears. Not sad ones, not exactly. Just... big ones. The kind that came when the world shifted a little under your feet.

Suddenly you heard footsteps coming down the hall.

You snapped out of it and quickly swiped the tab closed, locking your phone and tossing it aside just as Jake returned.

“Miss me?” he joked, flopping back down beside you.

You forced a smile, chest still tight. “Always.”

He leaned into you, grabbing your hand again. “So, what do we do first? Start looking at apartments? I already bookmarked this tiny studio near campus with the biggest kitchen ever .”

You laughed, letting him talk about your shared future, your heart splitting in two. One part still with him. The other already halfway across the world, in California.

The summer passed in a blur of travel plans, shopping lists, visa applications. Jake was so excited, always talking about your apartment, your future, the way you’d decorate with little succulents and string lights. You smiled, nodded, made Pinterest boards with him.

But at night, you stared at the Stanford portal, wondering what it meant to choose something he wasn’t part of.

One warm July afternoon, Jake surprised you with dinner reservations at a cozy Australian-themed diner “to get a real taste of Aussie life,” he’d said with a grin that made your heart flip.

The diner smelled like woodsmoke and grilled meat, a haze of barbecue spice hanging in the air as the late July sun filtered through the tall windows. You and Jake sat across from each other in a vinyl booth, the table between you cluttered with half-unwrapped sliders, charred corn, and paper baskets of fries dusted with pink sea salt. Somewhere nearby, a child was laughing over a spilled milkshake, and the sizzle of meat on the open grill played like background music to a summer evening that felt too big to hold in your chest.

Jake reached for a fry, eyes glowing with quiet excitement. “Okay, so… don’t kill me,” he said, trying and failing not to grin. “I did a thing.”

You narrowed your eyes playfully. “Please tell me you didn’t try to book our flights without me again.”

“No,” he laughed. “Um.. worse.”

He slid his phone across the table. The screen was lit up with a listing, the apartment. Your apartment. The one you’d found during a late-night spiral of Pinterest boards and real estate blogs. The one with exposed brick and tall windows and a kitchen that made your breath catch the first time you saw it. Big, sunlit, clean counters, even a little breakfast island with hanging lights overhead.

“You’re kidding,” you whispered, leaning in.

“I made an offer,” he said. “And… they accepted. If we want it, it’s ours.”

You blinked at the screen. The pictures hadn’t changed, but somehow they felt sharper now, more real. The wide kitchen, all open shelving and clean lines, looked like the kind of place people filmed romantic comedies in. You could see the two of you in it, Jake cooking in the mornings in his ridiculous pajama pants, you dancing barefoot to some awful playlist while coffee brewed.

You looked up at him. “Jake…”

“I know I should’ve asked,” he said quickly. “I just… I saw it again and I couldn’t stop thinking about it. That kitchen, the big window in the bedroom, the campus just down the street. It felt like us, you know?”

You sat back slowly, heart full and aching all at once.

“I just thought it could be home,” he added, voice softer now. “Our first perfect one.”

You didn’t speak right away.

You stared at the image. The bright white cabinets. The tall pantry. The way the light poured through the glass every morning.

You wanted it.

God, you wanted it so so much.

But not as much as you wanted to stop time. Not as much as you wanted to silence that quiet voice that had been growing louder since Stanford sent that email.

“Maybe…” you began, choosing your words carefully, gently. “Maybe we should look a bit more. Just to be sure. It’s a big decision.”

Jake blinked. “Oh. Yeah. Yeah, of course.”

He nodded quickly, lips pressing together in a tight smile that didn’t reach his eyes. “You’re right. No need to rush.”

You reached for your drink to avoid the way his gaze searched your face. “Exactly. We’ve got time.”

He leaned back, tried to laugh. “Honestly, we might even find something with a bigger balcony. Or even a bathtub. Who knows?”

You nodded, the fry in your hand going cold.

The moment passed, at least on the surface. He picked up his burger again, and you made a joke about fairy bread being the pinnacle of Australian cuisine. The two of you slipped back into the rhythm of laughing, dreaming, talking about color schemes and who would be in charge of dishes. But beneath it all, the dream had shifted. The apartment was perfect. But for the first time, you weren’t sure if perfect was enough.

It was late afternoon, the golden sun filtering through the window and casting long shadows across your bedroom. Boxes were everywhere, half-packed and labeled in your handwriting. A quiet playlist hummed in the background while the two of you worked side by side, sorting through his books, folding clothes, and deciding what made the cut for Melbourne.

You were kneeling beside the desk, packing paperbacks into a box labeled DO NOT BEND when Jake, searching for packing tape, reached over and grabbed a slim red folder tucked behind a lamp.

“Hey, what’s this?” he asked casually, flipping it open before you could stop him. His voice shifted mid-sentence, growing still. “Stanford?”

Your hands froze around a copy of The Secret of Us. The air thinned.

“Jake—”

“You applied to Stanford?” he asked again, slower this time, like he was trying to make sense of the words.

You sat back on your heels, throat dry. “I... yeah, i did.”

He looked at the folder again, then at you. “You got in?”

You nodded, barely.

A beat passed. Jake blinked, his jaw tightening, then loosening like he wasn’t sure what he was supposed to feel. He let out a short breath and took a small step back, the folder hanging limply in his hand. “When?”

You couldn’t look at him. “Same day as Melbourne.”

Silence. The kind that buzzes in your ears and makes your heart ache.

“And you didn’t tell me?” His voice was quieter now. Not angry, just... hurt. In total disbelief.

“I didn’t know how,” you whispered, fidgetting at the worn edges of the carpet. “I didn’t want to ruin everything.”

“Ruin what?” he said, then laughed short and humorless. “Us?”

You looked up. “I didn’t want to hurt you. I didn’t want you to think I’d just get up and leave.”

“But you didn’t even give me the chance to be proud of you,” he admitted. “You didn’t even let me in at all.”

You stood slowly, heart racing, words stuck in your throat. “I wasn’t going to go,” you said. “I swear, Jake. We planned this, and I meant it. I just... I needed time to figure it out.”

Jake shook his head, eyes scanning the floor around you like he was trying to ground himself. “You should’ve told me.”

“I know,” you whispered. “I was so scared.”

He looked at you then, really looked past the guilt, past the secrets. There was hurt in his eyes, yes, but something softer, too. A flicker of understanding.

“I wish you trusted me with this,” he said, voice low. “But... I get why you didn’t.”

You swallowed hard. “I’m sorry.”

He nodded, slowly. “You should go.”

Your heart cracked. “What?”

“I mean it,” he said, finally smiling, though it didn’t reach his eyes. “You got into Stanford. That’s huge. I’d never want to hold you back.”

“But…Jake—”

“I want you to go,” he repeated, gently this time. “Even if it’s the last thing I want.”

You didn’t realize you were crying until Jake filled the space between you in two steps and pulled you into his chest like he was afraid you might disappear if he didn’t hold on tight enough.

You clutched the front of his shirt, burying your face into the curve of his neck. “I didn’t want to lose you,” you choked out.

“You’re not,” he whispered, but his voice cracked. “God, you’re not.”

But it felt like you both were anyway.

His arms were wrapped around you, so tight it almost hurt, and still it didn’t feel close enough. You felt his chest hitch beneath your palms, his breath stuttering as silent tears spilled down his cheeks and into your hair.

“I hate this,” he said, his voice muffled in your shoulder. “I hate that I’m saying this.”

You pulled back just enough to see his face, his eyes red-rimmed and shining. “Then don’t. Tell me to stay. Tell me that we deserve that apartment together”

He stared at you, lips parted, like he wanted to. Like the words were right there on his tongue. But instead, he shook his head slowly, heartbreak carved into every line of his face. “I can’t. I love you too much to ask you to give up on something like this.”

A sob escaped before you could stop it. “I don’t want to go without you.”

Jake cupped your face in his hands, brushing away your tears with his thumbs. “You won’t be without me,” he whispered. “I’ll be there in every facetime call. Every late-night text. Every time you drink coffee and think it’s crap without me there to make it right.”

You laughed through the tears, and then he kissed you. Slow, aching, like a promise and a goodbye all at once. You kissed him back with everything you couldn’t say, everything you weren’t ready to lose.

When you finally broke apart, both of you breathless and trembling, he leaned his forehead against yours.

“We’ll figure it out,” he murmured. “Even if it’s hard. Even if it hurts. We’ll find our way back.”

You nodded, eyes closed. “You and me, right?”

His arms tightened around you, like he could still protect this fragile version of the future. “Always.”

He didn’t speak to you for two days.

No texts. No calls. No shared playlists or silly memes. Just a hollow silence that made your heart pound every time your phone lit up, just to close it every time it wasn’t him.

Then, just after sunset on the second day, your phone buzzed.

Ring Doorbell: Someone is at your front door.

You opened the app instinctively, and there he was, Jake, standing on your porch in a wrinkled hoodie and basketball shorts, his hands shoved deep in his pockets. His eyes were bloodshot red. Not just tired, but swollen, rimmed with tears, and haunted.

Your heart seized.

You rushed downstairs and opened the door.

He didn’t say anything at first. Just looked at you like he wasn’t sure if he should be here. Like maybe this was a mistake. Then his face crumpled.

“I don’t want you to go,” he said, and his voice cracked like glass.

You stepped forward without thinking, wrapping your arms around him before the rest of his words could fall apart.

“Jake…”

He held onto you like he was drowning. “I tried to be okay. I really did. I thought maybe I could just… move on, pretend we’re still going together. But I can’t. I’m so fucking proud of you, but I don’t know how to be happy when it feels like I’m losing you.”

You pulled back just enough to look at him. “Then don’t let me go,” you whispered. “Tell me to stay. I will.”

He blinked at you, tears spilling silently over his cheeks. “Don’t say that.”

“I mean it,” you said, chest aching. “I’ll stay. Melbourne was always the plan. We were the plan.”

Jake shook his head. “No,” he said, voice soft but firm. “You have to go. Please go.”

“Jake—”

“No,” he interrupted, brushing the hair gently from your face. “You got into Stanford. You earned that. You don’t give up a life-changing opportunity because some dumb boy can’t keep it together for a few months.”

“You’re not some dumb boy,” you whispered.

He smiled faintly, but his eyes were still sad. “And you’re not some girl who settles for a smaller school for someone else. You’ve always been more than that. You have to go.”

You stood there for a long moment, forehead pressed to his, your tears falling freely now too.

Eventually, you stepped back and took his hand. “Come inside?”

He nodded, and you led him through the door, into the quiet warmth of your house.

You sat together on the couch, knees pulled up, wrapped in an old shared blanket that smelled like his cologne and dryer sheets. He rested his head on your shoulder, and you stroked your fingers through his hair like you always did when he couldn’t sleep.

“I hate that we have to do this,” he mumbled. “The distance.”

“I know,” you said.

“But we’ll make it work, right?” he asked, more like a plea than a promise.

“We’ll try,” you whispered. “We’ll call every night. We’ll visit. We’ll find ways to stay close, even when we’re far.”

His arms tightened around you. “What if it’s not enough?”

“Then we try harder,” you replied, kissing the top of his head. “Or we wait. Or we fall apart and find our way back. But I’m not giving up on us, Jake. Not now.”

Neither of you had all the answers. Maybe you never would. But in that quiet moment on the couch, your hearts cracked but still beating in sync, you held each other like maybe, just maybe, love could stretch across the oceans and time zones.

Like maybe, it would be enough.

The airport was too quiet for what your heart was doing.

You stood with Jake in the check-in line, the weight of your suitcase nothing compared to the weight pressing on your chest. He held your hand like it was the last lifeline he had, like if he let go, he’d lose you completely.

Neither of you spoke much. There wasn’t anything left to say that hadn’t already been whispered between your tangled sheets, or mumbled on long drives with the windows down, or even scribbled into notes hidden in each other’s bags.

But that didn’t stop the tears.

Yours came in slow, steady streams down your cheeks. His were silent, but his lips trembled every time you squeezed his hand tighter. People passed around you, families saying goodbyes, kids running in circles, airport staff calling for final check-ins, but it all felt so far away. Like the world was moving on and you were frozen in this endless moment.

“We still have time,” he murmured, though the line inched forward, traitorous.

“Barely.”

You rested your head on his shoulder. His hoodie smelled like your house, like him, like safety.

“I hate this,” you whispered.

“I know.”

He kissed your temple. “But I’m proud of you. So proud. I need you to remember that.”

You nodded, biting your lip so hard it almost bled.

When you reached the counter, your hands shook as you handed over your passport. Jake stood beside you the whole time, his fingers trailing down your arm like he was memorizing every inch. The agent smiled politely, completely unaware of the heartbreak unfolding across the glossy countertop.

As you stepped away, the intercom crackled to life.

“Final boarding call for Flight 127 to San Francisco. All remaining passengers, please proceed to Gate 7.”

Your body turned toward the gate, but your heart stayed behind.

Jake pulled you into one last hug, full and trembling. You felt his tears finally fall, warm against your neck.

“This isn’t goodbye,” you whispered, but it cracked as you said it.

“It feels like one,” he choked out.

“I’ll come back in December. I pinky promise.”

“I’ll wait,” he said, holding you like he’d never get to again. “I’ll wait for however long it takes.”

You pulled back just enough to kiss him once, twice, and again like you could kiss the goodbye out of him. He smiled, for your sake, even though his lips were shaking.

“Go,” he said softly, eyes red. “Before I lose my mind.”

You took one step back. Then another. You didn’t want to look away, but you knew if you didn’t go now, you never would.

So you turned.

And you walked.

And you didn’t look back.

But Jake did.

He watched you until the very last second, until you were out of sight, until the boarding gate swallowed you whole.

And then he broke.

His body crumpled into a seat by the window, hands over his face as sobs tore out of him, raw and relentless. Strangers passed by, but none of them saw him. None of them knew the girl he loved just left for another continent, or how he’d told her to chase her dreams even if it meant tearing himself apart.

He’d been brave for you.

But now, all alone in that airport, he cried like he’d never stop.

Because he loved you that much.

[mistyshane30]

You Were Never Mine to Lose (Chapter 6)

Synopsis: The other night was a lot, and now here you are, at an amusement park. It’s supposed to be a distraction, but you can’t help but feel like something’s just… waiting to happen. Just not yet.

Word count: 6k

Warnings: Subtle angst, Lingering tension, Unresolved emotions

A/N: Just wanted to say a big thanks for all the awesome comments on my fic! Your support really means a lot to me. I love hearing what you think! I can’t wait for you to see what’s coming next♡

The sharp chime of the doorbell jolts you awake. Groaning, you reach for your phone, squinting at the screen as your eyes adjust to the bright light. 

12:07 PM 

Your heart nearly stops. Noon?! 

Your notifications are a mess—17 missed calls from Jen, 10 from Wanda, and an explosion of texts from the group chat. A sinking realization hits you: you must have accidentally muted your phone last night. Not surprising, considering you tossed and turned until at least 3 AM overanalyzing every moment with Agatha yesterday. 

Another impatient ring of the doorbell makes you groan. You drag yourself out of bed, feeling dizzy and a little off from the lack of sleep. You’re moving in slow motion as you head for the front door. When you open it, your friends are standing there, looking less than impressed. 

Jen’s arms are crossed over her chest, a mix of concern and irritation on her face. Alice, Wanda, and Lilia are behind her, all looking like they’ve been up for hours while you’ve just barely dragged yourself out of bed. Your eyes immediately flick to Agatha, naturally.  

She stands there effortlessly put together in a camel brown structured sleeveless top, black well-tailored wide-leg trousers, chunky dad sneakers, a Loewe crossbody bag, and black shades. It’s criminal how good she looks in something so simple. Your gaze lingers longer than it should before you snap back to reality. 

Jen crosses her arms. “Seriously? You’re just waking up?” 

Wanda huffs. “We thought you were dead.” 

“You guys are so dramatic,” you mumble, stepping aside to let them in. “I accidentally muted my phone last night.” 

“And?” Jen presses, still unimpressed. 

You scratch the back of your head. “Overslept. I had to check work emails before bed, so I ended up sleeping late.” 

Technically not a lie—you did check your emails. But the real reason? You couldn’t stop thinking about Agatha. Her lingering gazes. The way her breath hitched at the beach. The way she looked at you across the table at Nobu. 

Agatha hums, arms crossed over her chest. “That’s cute. Imagine taking a vacation just to work and look like shit in the morning.” 

You scoff. “Imagine going on vacation just to go from a hot tub to a sauna like you’re trying to get heatstroke.” 

She smirks. “Maybe I just like being warm. Unlike you, who apparently enjoys hibernating.” 

Jen pinches the bridge of her nose. “Can we not do this first thing in the afternoon? Y/N, go get ready. Now. We’re going to Pacific Park, and you have five minutes.” 

You hold up a hand in surrender. “Alright, alright. Ten minutes.” 

“Seven.” 

“Deal.” You turn to head upstairs. “Try not to miss me while I’m gone.” 

Agatha mutters under her breath. “Not possible.” 

You pretend not to hear it. 

Fifteen minutes later, you finally head downstairs, fully dressed and ready to go. Okay, maybe you took a little longer than planned. Sue you. 

You opted for a white fitted cashmere tank top, Hermès brown tailored high-waist shorts, Dior sneakers, a YSL Lou camera bag, and a deep olive green cap. A perfect balance of casual and effortless chic. 

Jen checks her watch. “Not bad. I expected worse.” 

You grin. “You have so little faith in me.” 

Wanda looks you up and down. “I mean, you still look like you just woke up, but at least you’re dressed.” 

You roll your eyes. “Can I at least eat something before we go?” 

Lilia waves a dismissive hand. “We’ll hit the McDonald’s drive-thru on the way.” 

You sigh. “Fine. But if my McMuffin gets cold, someone’s paying.” 

Alice smirks. “We’ll send the bill to Agatha. She’s the one who called you a hibernating bear.” 

Agatha scoffs, tilting her head at you. “Only because it’s true.” 

You roll your eyes and grab your bag. “Let’s go before I actually commit a crime today.” 

As you step out of the villa, the sun warming your skin as you make your way to the main entrance of the resort. The van is parked just a little ahead, waiting for you and the others. You’re the first one to get inside, claiming the back seat behind the driver. You sit down and pull out your phone, scrolling through social media to distract yourself from the anticipation of what’s ahead. 

Agatha slides in beside you a few moments later, as effortlessly composed as ever. She flashes you a smile, one that’s way too confident for your liking. You return the smile, but there’s something about it that feels a little too forced. You quickly avert your gaze, focusing on your phone like it’s the most interesting thing in the world. 

Wanda sits down beside Agatha, followed by the others, and the van slowly pulls off. The hum of the road is calming at first, but you can still feel Agatha’s presence beside you like an electric current you’re trying to ignore. You scroll through your feed, hoping to lose yourself in the digital noise. 

After about 45 minutes, you start to spot the signs of the amusement park from the van window—ferris wheels, roller coasters, the blur of bright colors that instantly reminds you of childhood summers. The excitement in the air is palpable, and soon, the van pulls up to the entrance. You step out into the warm air, your stomach doing a little flip at the thought of all the rides. 

Jen heads straight for the ticket booth and returns with wristbands. She hands them out to everyone—Unlimited Ride Wristbands. You stare at the plastic band in your hand, already dreading the rides ahead. 

Jen claps her hands together. “Alright, let’s get a photo first! You guys need to remember this moment.” 

You all gather together, everyone flashing smiles as Jen takes the photo. You try to smile, but something about the whole thing feels a little off. Maybe it’s the weight of the rides you know are coming. 

Alice, always the one to jump into the action, suggests the West Coaster as the first ride. 

Your heart drops at the mention of it. “How about we start easy? There’s the Sig EV Alert. It’s a little more chill, right?” You try to sound casual, but your stomach churns at the thought of a big roller coaster. You know yourself, dizziness is your worst enemy. 

Agatha shoots you a sideways glance, her lips curling into a smirk. “Oh, come on. What’s the matter? Are you scared?” 

You roll your eyes, trying to brush off the feeling of nerves creeping up on you. “I’m not scared, Agatha. Just think it’s better to ease into things.” 

She leans back with a challenge in her eyes. “Really? A vote’s been called, then.” 

The group eagerly agrees to start with the West Coaster, and you immediately regret your attempt to steer them away from it. You tell yourself you can handle it, though—you’re fine, you repeat like a mantra, even though you know it’s a lie. 

As you approach the roller coaster, Wanda nudges your elbow gently. “Hey,” she says softly, leaning in close. “Are you sure you want to do this? You know you get dizzy easily.” 

You force a smile. “I’m fine, Wanda. Really.” 

She doesn’t look convinced, her brow furrowing. “You can sit this one out. No shame in that.” 

But you shake your head, refusing to back down. “No way. I’m not letting Agatha think I’m backing out. I can handle it.” 

Wanda sighs, her concern still clear. “Alright, but if you pass out halfway, don’t say I didn’t warn you.” 

You give her a small smile and step forward with the group. But just as you’re about to sit down, something happens—you realize Agatha is sitting right next to you. Your stomach twists again. 

Her smirk is almost too much to handle. “I’m gonna enjoy this,” she murmurs, low enough for only you to hear. 

You roll your eyes but try to play it cool. “We’ll see about that.” 

The ride begins its slow ascent, the familiar clicking noise echoing through the air. You feel every inch of the climb, your heart thumping in your chest as the coaster makes its way higher. For a brief moment, everything is calm. Too calm. It’s the kind of calm that makes you realize just how much you don’t want to be here. You grip the safety bar tightly, knuckles turning white, your palms sweating against the cool metal. 

Your stomach flips, and you feel the weight of the height sinking in. You glance over at Agatha, sitting beside you with her usual cool, confident demeanor. She seems completely unfazed, her eyes glinting with something like amusement. You swallow hard, trying to keep your cool. This was your idea, right? You had to prove you weren’t scared. 

Then, the coaster pauses at the peak—that peak—the one where it feels like you’re teetering on the edge of the world. Everything below looks so far away, a blur of colors and tiny dots that might be people, but you can’t focus on that. The world seems to hold its breath, and so do you. 

Then—BAM! 

The coaster shoots forward with sudden, brutal speed, your stomach dropping out from under you. You don’t even have time to prepare before the wind rushes through your hair, and the shrill scream that escapes your throat is one you didn’t even know you had in you. Your hands instinctively shoot out to grab onto anything, everything. 

Your fingers latch onto something warm, soft, and surprisingly firm. You don’t realize what you’ve done at first. Your brain is too busy trying to process the chaos around you, the twisting and jerking of the ride, the air rushing by in a constant scream of its own. Your eyes squeeze shut for a moment as the coaster dips and turns, the ride's movements jarring, sending your stomach into an endless loop of flips. 

Oh God, what have I done? Why did I agree to this? 

The twists and turns keep coming, faster, harsher, as the ride whips you through the air. Your scream isn’t just fun now; it’s a primal, terrified sound. It feels like you’re falling forever, your body jerking this way and that. You feel the pressure in your chest, your breath coming out in shallow bursts, but through it all, your hand is still clenched around whatever is in front of you. 

That “whatever” is Agatha’s hand. 

It’s only when the coaster starts to slow down that you realize what’s happened. Your hand, still gripping Agatha’s, is now nearly crushed in your panic. Your face flushes red as you snap your eyes open, trying to catch your breath, the noise of the ride dying down around you. You feel disoriented—nauseous, even—and your heart is still racing. 

The ride finally halts, and your body slumps against the backrest, drenched in sweat. You feel like you’ve just run a marathon, your skin clammy and cold, your breath coming in gasps. You’re still dazed, but you suddenly become acutely aware of the hand you’re holding. You jerk your hand away from Agatha’s, mortified, hoping no one noticed the unintentional closeness you shared. 

You glance around quickly. Everyone else is laughing and talking excitedly, their voices a blur. They didn’t notice. Thank God. 

Except Agatha. She saw. Of course, she did. 

Her lips curl into that sly smirk, the one that makes you want to crawl under a rock. She looks over at you, that gleam of recognition in her eyes. “You look a little green there, Y/N,” she teases, her voice dripping with amusement. “Roller coasters not your thing?” 

You want to disappear. The heat creeping up your neck is nearly unbearable. You manage to cough out a nonchalant response, your voice a little higher than normal. “It was fine. Totally fine.” But even you can hear the lie in it. 

You don’t meet her gaze. You can’t. The thought of her knowing what just happened—of her knowing you—it’s too much. 

The group continues to tease you, laughing and poking fun at your reaction. You try to laugh along, but it comes out flat, forced. You wish you could just blend into the background, escape the spotlight that feels like it’s shining just a little too bright on you. 

Wanda, however, seems to sense that something’s wrong. She quietly steps up beside you, her voice low and concerned. “Y/N, are you sure you’re okay?” She looks at you with an almost protective gaze. “Like, really okay?” 

You manage a weak smile, brushing off her worry like it’s nothing. “I’m great. Totally great. Really.” You try to sound convincing, but Wanda doesn’t look entirely convinced. 

She doesn’t push further, though. Instead, she just pats your shoulder lightly and nods, though you can see she’s not buying your act. The others are still bickering amongst themselves about the next ride, oblivious to your inner turmoil. 

You don’t know how you make it through the rest of the day. You feel like you’re walking in a fog, each ride making your stomach churn more than the last. You’re so dizzy you could swear you’re going to pass out. But you keep pushing through it, knowing Agatha’s eyes are always on you, even when you try not to meet her gaze. 

Finally, you find a little relief on the Sig EV Alert ride. It’s simple. Fun, even. It’s a bumper car ride, something you can do without fear of your stomach trying to escape your body. It’s a tiny break in the chaos, but as you steer your bumper car, you can’t stop yourself from looking at her, and just like that, she catches you. Her eyes twinkle with amusement as she leans forward in her seat, an eyebrow arched in challenge. “What’s the matter, Y/N? I didn’t think bumper cars were so interesting.” 

Your heart thuds in your chest again, and you force yourself to look away, cheeks flushed. “It’s not,” you reply, but the corner of your mouth betrays you with a tiny, involuntary smile. 

After all the rides, your group decides to grab something to eat at Smashie’s Burger. You take the chance to slip away to the bathroom, needing a moment to catch your breath after all the chaos. You wash your face, trying to shake off the dizziness from the rides. You’re not sure if you’re more worn out from the rides or from trying to act like everything's fine in front of everyone. 

When you come back to the table, everyone’s chatting and laughing, already a little more energized from the food. You slide in, a little quieter than usual, and take your seat. Your eyes drift to Agatha—she’s got her phone in hand, typing something, looking all serious. You wonder for a second if she’s texting Ralph or maybe dealing with some work stuff. Either way, you can’t help but watch her. It’s like she’s in a world of her own, and it pulls you in even though you’re trying to look away. 

You start eating, trying to pretend like everything’s normal. It’s harder than it should be, but you make yourself focus on the food, even as you keep stealing glances at her. Her phone goes down, and she finally takes a bite of her burger. There’s something about the way she eats—so casually, so effortlessly—that makes you feel like you're standing just a bit too close to something you’re not sure how to handle. 

Before long, Jen’s done with her fries and is already looking around with that excited energy of hers. “Okay, who’s ready for the next round?” she asks, clearly buzzing. 

Wanda’s practically bouncing in her seat. “I’m heading to the Cat Rack. I need to win a stuffed animal.” 

Alice’s grinning, not to be outdone. “I’m hitting the Ring Toss. I’m definitely gonna win this time.” 

The group starts breaking up, everyone heading off in different directions. You’re left with Agatha, and for a split second, the silence feels a little too loud between you two. You can’t tell if it’s awkward or just... weird, but you feel it. 

You clear your throat, trying to make the best of it. “So... where do you want to go?” 

And, of course, you both speak at the same time. “Where do you want to go?” 

You both freeze for a moment, then laugh, but it’s not the easiest laugh. It’s more like you're both trying to fill the space that’s been left hanging. You smile, trying to ease the tension. 

“Sorry, didn’t mean to—” 

Agatha shakes her head, cutting you off. “It’s fine. I was thinking Water Race. Let’s do that.” 

You give her a look. “Water Race? Really?” 

“Really,” she says with that grin you know is always a little too knowing. “I wanna see if you’re as good at this as you say you are.” 

You roll your eyes but can’t help the smirk that pulls at your lips. “Oh, I’m great at it. Just wait and see.” 

You pay for both of you, the two of you standing side by side, staring down at the game ahead. You tell yourself it’s just a game, but the competition is starting to feel a little more intense than it should. Agatha’s in the lane next to you, her water gun aimed perfectly, and you know this is it. Time to prove you’re better. 

The game starts, and the water blasts out from the guns, splashing against the targets. You’re both giving it your all, but after a few rounds, you realize it’s not just the two of you in this race. There are other players too. And none of you are winning. 

You try to stay casual, hiding the irritation that’s slowly creeping up on you. You keep buying new entries, trying to beat the other players, but every time, someone else wins. The frustration builds, and despite how much you want to pretend it doesn’t bother you, it does. It really does. 

Agatha notices. “You okay there?” she teases, her voice light but that hint of amusement in her eyes. 

You force a smile. “Yeah, I’m fine. Just warming up.” 

But after another round, when you lose again, you can’t hold back the annoyance anymore. You feel it in your chest, tight and heavy, and you can’t shake it. The other player keeps winning, and you just want to win something. Anything. 

Finally, after what feels like a hundred tries, it happens. You hit the target, and the bell rings, signaling that you’ve won. You almost can’t believe it, the rush of victory flooding you as you hold the water gun in triumph. Your heart’s pounding, but there’s something about it that feels better than all the other wins you’ve seen. 

The prize is a stuffed bunny. It’s not the biggest or most impressive thing, but to you, it’s everything. You hold it up in the air, your face lighting up in the purest, most unfiltered joy. 

Agatha’s standing next to you, eyes wide with surprise at how over the top your reaction is. “Really? That’s how excited you are about a stuffed bunny?” 

You can’t stop grinning, bouncing on your feet. “I won! I really won! This is the best thing ever!” 

You hold the bunny to your chest like it’s the greatest prize you’ve ever gotten. It’s ridiculous, but it feels like you’ve just won the lottery, and for once, you don’t care how silly it looks. 

Agatha snorts, clearly amused. “You’re kind of ridiculous, you know that?” 

You just shrug, still holding your prize. “I don’t care.” 

She shakes her head, smiling despite herself. “Alright, alright. You win. I won’t argue with you and your little bunny.” 

You stand there for a second, still buzzing from the win, when you glance at Agatha again. She’s looking at you in that quiet, knowing way, like she’s seeing you in a way she hasn’t before. For a brief moment, everything feels lighter, like maybe, just maybe, there’s something else here between you two. 

After your victory at the Water Race, you’re still holding your prize, that stupidly adorable bunny stuffed toy, when the mystery player who had kept winning approaches you. She has a confident smile on her face, and there’s something about her that catches your attention. Maybe it’s the way she walks up to you without hesitation, or how she looks like she knows exactly what she’s doing. 

“Hey,” she says, her voice smooth and warm. “That was some impressive shooting. No one’s ever beaten me at this game before.” 

You glance at her in surprise, a little thrown off by the compliment. “Thanks,” you reply, trying to keep your cool, but there’s a flutter of nerves in your stomach. 

She grins, her gaze lingering on you just a bit too long. “I’m Rio Vidal, by the way,” she adds, extending her hand. “Nice to meet you.” 

You shake her hand, still feeling a bit off balance. “I’m Y/N, and this is Agatha.” 

Agatha, standing nearby, doesn’t seem to react much, but you can feel her attention shift, just slightly. Rio doesn’t seem to notice. She’s too busy smiling at you, her eyes sparkling with something that feels... too intentional. 

“So,” Rio continues, her tone teasing, “What brings you to the Water Race? You definitely look like a woman who’s up for a challenge.” She leans a little closer, voice lowering in a way that makes you blink in surprise. “I like that.” 

You catch yourself before you do something weird, like laugh too loud or look confused. Instead, you go with it. “Well, I’m actually on a bachelorette vacation with my friends,” you say with a playful shrug. “It’s all about letting loose and having some fun.” 

Rio raises an eyebrow. “A bachelorette? That’s interesting... you’re clearly not shy about winning.” She holds out a business card. “If your friend is still looking for flowers for her wedding, I’m your girl. I’m a florist, you know. I’d be happy to help out.” 

You take the card from her, half-smiling. “I’ll let her know. Thanks, Rio.” 

She lingers a little longer, her eyes not leaving you. “No problem. It was nice meeting you... maybe I’ll see you around, yeah?” 

You’re pretty sure she means something more than just “seeing you around,” but you just smile and nod. “For sure. Take care.” 

As she walks away, you glance at Agatha, who’s giving you a look that’s almost... incredulous. “What the hell was that?” she asks, her voice thick with something you can’t quite pinpoint. 

You give her a confused look. “What do you mean?” 

Agatha huffs, crossing her arms, still staring at you. “That lady was literally flirting with you.” 

You shrug, trying to act like it’s no big deal, even though a little part of you feels flustered. “Nah. She’s just being friendly. Nothing more to it.” 

Before Agatha can respond, you quickly hold out the stuffed bunny toy you just won. You catch Agatha off guard with it, her eyes widening for a second as she stares at the toy in your hands. 

She looks at you, confused. “What’s this for?” 

You try to keep it casual, but your heart’s thumping in your chest. “You can have it,” you say, your voice casual even though the butterflies are going wild in your stomach. “I’m not really into stuffed toys. I just liked the idea of winning. You can take it home with you, though. Maybe give it to your kids after the trip.” 

Agatha blinks, clearly taken aback by your sudden generosity. “You... want me to take it?” 

You nod, trying not to let the heat on your cheeks show. “Yeah. I mean, I’m not really gonna keep it. And I figure you could use it.” 

She looks at the bunny again, then back at you. For a moment, there’s this unreadable look in her eyes, and for a second, you think she might turn it down. But then, she sighs and takes the bunny from your hands. 

“Thanks,” she says softly, her tone warmer than you expected. “I’ll... keep it safe.” 

You smile at her, feeling the rush of your little exchange with Rio slowly fade away, replaced by this new, quieter moment with Agatha. As much as you try to convince yourself it’s no big deal, something about the way she accepts the bunny... it feels a little more personal than it should. And for once, you’re okay with that. 

You and Agatha were lost in the competitive spirit of the games, going from Whac-A-Mole to Balloon Bust to Roll-A-Ball, each one more ridiculous than the last. Neither of you were willing to back down, constantly teasing each other over every small win and every tiny defeat. The laughter and playful banter between you two felt natural, easy... but it wasn’t until you realized the sun was starting to set that you looked around and noticed how dark it had gotten. 

"Whoa," you muttered, glancing at your phone. "It’s already six?" 

Agatha glanced up, eyebrow raised. "Guess we’ve been here longer than we thought." 

You shrugged, your competitive streak still burning. "Well, I’m not done yet." 

"Maybe I’m done." Agatha smirked, a mischievous glint in her eyes, but you could tell she wasn’t serious. 

"Alright, break time," you said, stretching your arms out. "Pretzels. I’m starving." 

You headed to Wetzel’s Pretzels, the smell of warm dough and salt filling the air. As you placed your order and grabbed the food, you got a text from the group chat. 

Jen: Meet us at the Pacific Wheel when you’re done! 

Taking the pretzel and frozen lemonade, you turned to look around for Agatha, but she wasn’t there. Confused, you glanced over the park, but she was nowhere to be found. You started walking around, trying to find her amidst the crowd. Finally, you spotted her in the quieter part of the park, her back turned toward you. She was on the phone, and her voice was sharp, like she was holding something back. 

Your steps slowed, and you stopped a few feet away, not wanting to intrude. But you heard it. The tension in her voice, the way it wavered when she spoke. 

“I can’t keep doing this, Ralph.” Her words were clipped, cold, and there was something raw underneath them that made you pause, your heart sinking. 

She didn’t notice you at first, so you lingered quietly, unsure if you should stay or leave. It didn’t feel right, intruding on whatever this was. From the bits and pieces of her conversation, you pieced together that whatever she was dealing with—whatever was going on between her and Ralph—was more serious than you expected. 

The call ended abruptly, and Agatha’s shoulders tensed, her hand slipping to her side as she hung up, visibly angry. She didn’t turn around right away, but when she did, her eyes met yours—frozen, wide, like a deer caught in headlights. 

You opened your mouth to speak, but before you could find the words, you cleared your throat awkwardly, pretending you hadn’t overheard anything. “The group is at the Pacific Wheel,” you said lightly, your voice casual, even though your heart was pounding. “Jen texted in the group chat.” 

Agatha stared at you for a beat longer than necessary, her lips pressed into a thin line, but she didn’t comment on the phone call. Instead, she sighed, walking toward you. You handed her the pretzel and frozen lemonade. She took them wordlessly, her fingers brushing yours for just a second. 

The two of you walked in silence, the air between you thick with unsaid things. You could feel the tension radiating from Agatha, the way her usual confidence had shrunk a little, replaced by something... quieter. You wanted to ask her if she was okay, but every time you opened your mouth, the words felt wrong. 

When you finally reached the group by the Pacific Wheel, they immediately teased you both, noticing the awkward atmosphere. 

"Look at you two," Jen grinned, winking at you. "Looks like you’re back to your old bickering." 

But you didn’t hear her. Agatha hadn’t smiled in hours, not since that phone call. She was quieter than usual, her sharp edges dulled by something you couldn’t touch, something heavy weighing her down. You could tell it wasn’t just the usual gruffness, this was something different. The way she seemed distant, as if she were carrying an invisible burden. It was the same look you’d seen before, back when she thought she could keep everything together, even if her world was on fire. 

You opened your mouth to say something, to ask if she was okay... but Jen beat you to it. 

“Alright, we all need to ride the Pacific Wheel now,” she announced, grinning. “It’s the last ride for tonight.” 

Agatha barely even glanced up. “Pass,” she said flatly, a tiredness in her tone that wasn’t usual for her. 

“You’re on vacation, Governor,” Lilia teased, emphasizing the title just to see her roll her eyes. “One last ride won’t kill you.” 

Jennifer caught on and nudged Agatha toward the line. “Yeah, come on. This’ll be the last ride of the night. Just do it for the fun of it.” 

Agatha didn’t have a choice anymore. She was trapped. 

The group made their way to the gondola, Jen and Wanda taking the first one. Then Agatha climbed into the second gondola, and without thinking, you sat beside her. She didn’t even try to protest—just gave you a look, her eyes soft and a little tired, but she didn’t say anything. You could feel the weight of her silence next to you. 

The gondola slowly began to ascend, the lights of the amusement park flickering below, casting a soft glow on the quiet faces around you. But the stillness between you and Agatha felt louder than the sounds of the park. 

The ferris wheel spun gently, and for a moment, you thought about reaching out to her—asking if she was okay, if she wanted to talk. But she was already looking ahead, her eyes fixed on the horizon. It was clear she wasn’t ready to talk. 

The quiet stretched on, thick and heavy, as you watched the city lights twinkle below. You couldn’t shake the feeling that whatever Agatha was dealing with... it was more than just a phone call. More than just a bad moment. But for now, all you could do was sit there beside her, the awkward silence wrapping around you both like a heavy cloak. 

The gondola rocks gently as the Pacific Wheel lifts you both higher, the amusement park shrinking below. Neon lights flicker across Agatha’s face, reflecting in her stormy blue eyes. The silence is thick, heavier than the humid air, but you’re the one who finally breaks it. 

"Wanna talk about it?" Your voice is quiet, unintrusive. You’re not pushing, but the door is open if she wants to walk through it. 

Agatha doesn’t respond right away. She exhales slowly, eyes fixed on the horizon, and when she finally speaks, her voice is measured. "How much did you hear?" 

"Enough." You don’t elaborate. You don’t need to. 

Another beat of silence. Agatha’s fingers drum against the metal bar in front of her, and when she finally looks at you, her expression is guarded, like she’s waiting for a hit to land. 

"You’re gonna scold me, aren’t you? Tease me? Tell me how I should’ve seen this coming? Go ahead, get it over with." 

It’s defensive, a preemptive strike. The kind of thing she says when she’s bracing for a fight. When she wants to keep you at arm’s length. But you don’t take the bait. 

Instead, you just look at her—really look at her. And when you speak, it’s only one word, "No." 

Agatha stills. Maybe she expected you to gloat, to mock, to treat this like another battle in your endless war of words. But you don’t. And that makes her pause. 

You soften, let your voice dip into something almost gentle. "I just think... you deserve better than this." 

Then, without thinking too much about it, you reach out, fingers brushing against hers. It’s not a grand gesture, just a quiet reassurance. But Agatha, who has spent years pretending she doesn’t need anyone, doesn’t pull away. 

She looks away instead, scoffing like she can deflect the weight of this moment. "God, you’re such a sap." 

But the bite isn’t there. And for the first time, you see it—that flicker of doubt, the crack in the foundation she’s built so carefully around herself. 

The Ferris wheel slows at the top, leaving you both suspended in midair. Agatha exhales, tipping her head back against the cool metal. 

"It’s Ralph," she admits finally. "He’s... not doing well. And I’m the one keeping everything together." Her voice is bitter, laced with exhaustion. "I work my ass off, and he just—he doesn’t even try anymore. And I don’t have time to fix him." 

You don’t say anything right away. You don’t mock. You don’t lecture. You just watch her carefully before offering something she doesn’t expect, "That sounds exhausting." 

Agatha tenses at first, then exhales shakily. No one has ever acknowledged that before. 

The Ferris wheel lurches, the descent beginning. 

You lean in slightly, tilting your head. "So... are you gonna keep pretending everything’s fine?" 

Agatha lets out a dry laugh, one that doesn’t quite reach her eyes. "Of course. It’s what I do." 

You shake your head, smirking a little. "Classic Agatha Harkness." 

There’s a beat. And then, unexpectedly, she teases back. The words are soft, almost... fond. 

"Shut up." 

You only grin, but there’s something lingering between you both now—something unspoken, something fragile. 

The Ferris wheel reaches the bottom. The moment is over. 

As you step off together, you murmur, "You should tell them. The others. They’d understand." 

Agatha scoffs, rolling her eyes. "You give them too much credit." 

You shrug. "Or maybe you don’t give them enough." 

That makes her pause. She turns to you fully then, studying you in a way that makes your chest feel tight. 

"And you?" Her voice is quieter now, layered with something deeper. "Do you understand?" 

You swallow. There’s something vulnerable beneath her usual sarcasm, something you’re not sure what to do with. 

"I’m trying to," you admit. 

For a second, it looks like she might say something else. But before she can, the moment is gone. 

Agatha exhales sharply, straightening like she’s shaking something off. Then, without another word, running a hand through her hair, then moves toward where the group has gathered. You follow, watching as she exhales and schools her face back into something neutral. 

Then she smirks, sliding back into her usual armor. "Well, if this was your way of trying to comfort me, you’re terrible at it." 

You roll your eyes, falling into step beside her. "And yet, you didn’t push me away." 

She glances at you from the corner of her eye. "Maybe I’m slipping." 

Maybe she was. 

Or maybe—just maybe—she was finally letting you in. 

The group gathers for a final photo of the night, all smiling. Just as the camera clicks, fireworks explode behind you, painting the sky in golds and blues. 

Agatha is standing beside you. And for the first time in forever, she feels a little lighter. 

You feel her gaze linger longer than it should. But when you glance her way, she looks away fast, pretending she wasn’t staring at all. 

You pretend you don’t notice. 

And then, just like that, the night is over. 

You all head back to the resort, splitting off into your separate villas. But even as you close the door behind you, the weight of the night lingers, something unspoken settling deep in your chest. 

Agatha Harkness is slipping. 

And maybe... so are you. 

Taglist:@6stolenangel9 @charlottelinlin1 @milflovers4 @claramelooo @loveshineslikethesky @kaymariesworld @marcelinaceciliarose @misskassycollins @greyella @theothersideofthescreen @whitelotus00 @agathaallalongg @psychickryptonitebouquet @sweetmidnights @angel-kitten-babygirl-u-choose @filmedbyharkness @brekker157 @rizzlesregal13 @starbucks-06

[pazzispizookies]

~~~~Dangerous question~~~~

Chapter 2

Hey guys!I was truly expecting no one to read chapter one lol, so. im so greatfull for all the people that did!! I really really appreciate reblogging and tagging!! Help me get some reach y’all im very new. :) again thank you all so very much and my inbox is wide open. If you’ve ever thought of a prompt you want to read send it and I’ll write it. Truly there’s nothing I’ll say no to. (Well expect yknow insane shit)

Pairing: Paige x Azzi, friends to lovers slow burn

September 13th, 2023.

Azzi POV:

The sun is attacking my eyesight as soon as I wake up, it’s quickly accompanied by a banging and throbbing force in my head.

Forcing myself out of bed, I glance at the clock

6:23

What the fuck am I doing awake so early.

I’m startled out of my thoughts as my door swings open.

“Good afternoon sunshine!!”

I love Caroline I really do, but at this moment I want her to shut her mouth and never open it again.

“Get outtt please i’m dead, can’t you have any sympathy for the dead caro?”

“Nope, your gonna be late, we’ve gotta get going Az, -were you taking a nap?” Caroline says standing a little too confindently where her hands crossed over her chest.

“What do you mean nap? I just woke up Car?”

“Azzi it’s 6! PM! We have team dinner at 7”

Shit.

I suddenly have a burst of energy at this statement realizing fuck, I’m gonna be late and look hungover in front of my teammates, and Paige.

Paige,

Paige who showered me last night, Paige who carried me to bed and helped me get changed, Paige who stayed up with me till I feel asleep, worrying I was gonna be sick again.

Paige who I think saw blushing while I was showering?

Why is my heart racing at this, why do I care what she sees me like?

“Azzi? Azzi Fudd?” Caroline claps.

“Okay, okay yeah, just please make me a cup of coffee I’ll get ready.”

Caroline mumbles as she walks out of my dorm towards the kitchen leaving me standing in the middle of my dorm.

6:25 Pm.

Okay yeah, I’ve gotten ready in less time. I just need to leave at 6:50 to get to the restaurant, which gives me… 25 mintues to shower, change, do my hair and makeup.

Ugh.

Normally I wouldn’t even bother with makeup or hair, but for some reason I feel a pull to get ready today, wanting to look good for some reason I can’t place my finger on.

I stumble to the bathroom and turn on the shower, finding my discarded clothes from last night. I toss them to the side and hop in the shower.

The sent of Vanilla and lavender quickly fills the room while I wash my hair, giving me a slight calming feeling.

Last night suddenly hits me.

I remember leaving the party with Paige’s stupid excuse, and then falling sick shorty after, but there’s something else I remember too.

Paige being not her normal cocky self, but shy?

I could’ve sworn I saw her blush last night while I was in the shower, but it must’ve been just the lighting.

Paige is my best friend and a pretty big celebrity. She came out to me a while ago, even though it was never really a secret.

And I’ve known that girls are attracted to her, and with her aura of confidence, I don’t doubt it.

Why does that thought make my heart skip a beat?

But anyways, i’m sure Paige has had her share of incounters with girls, but all the ones I’ve seen her flirt with, even though I try not to look when it happens, are all stunning. Truly all models.

They’re normally shorter then her, and have long flowing hair and know how to do there makeup without it coming out like a 5 year old do it.

So why would she be blushing at me?

Yeah i’m not ugly, but I definitely don’t look like those girls. I’m talking 5’11 to be exact and even though my hairs gotten a lot longer it’s still curly and normally thrown in 2 braids or a bun.

I do get attention from people, but I don’t know how to flirt really, so it goes no where.

my train of thought is interrupted by knocking at the door.

“Az cmon, you got like 20 more minutes” Caroline shouts muffled behind the door.

“Okay!! Coming!!”

I stumble out of the shower quickly without rising all of my hair product out so i can style it a little bit,

I make my way to my closet and glance at the clock again

6:32. Ugh.

Looking at my closet I realize im gonna need some help.

“caro! Can you come in here!”

Caroline comes walking in with a cup of coffee in hand, thank god.

“What’s up Az? You gonna wear a towel to dinner?” Caroline teases

“No, but I need some help” I mumble out, suddenly feeling a little insecure.

with a nod from a Caroline to continue my sentence I take deep breath and gesture towards my closet

“I need help with what to wear, I wanna look hot.”

Caroline’s eye widen for a second before she leans back and crosses her arms again.

“ohhhh, you trying to impress a certain someone, maybe a certain someone on the boys basketball team who’s been in your DMs since last week?” Caroline drags out.

I totally forgot all about AJ,a guy, pretty cute,on the baksetball team who’s texted me a few times.

I just assumed he was being friendly since were both freshman but with the way shes saying it, maybe I’m wrong..

But because I don’t really know why I want to look good tonight, I decide that’s a pretty good excuse.

“Yeah sure, whatever just make me hot please.” I say flopping down on my bed.

Caroline gets to work in my closet throwing things out.

After a minute or so she holds up a dress, a black one I completely forgot I even owned,

The dress isn’t anything too crazy but definitely not something i’d normally grab, but seeing as the restaurants a little nicer maybe it’s not the worst idea.

She quickly pulls out another outfit option.

A black fitted button up, with a black mini pencil skirt, and she’s holding along with it a push-up bra that has to be from 7th grade.

“I said make me hot, not make me a hooters worker.” I say glancing up at her smirk.

“trust me Az this is the prefect mix between, ‘yeah I’m smart and sweet’ and ‘yeah I’m hot as fuck’ cmon just try it!”

Reluctantly, I get up and grab the shirt, skirt, and stupid bra. I give her a death look before moving into the closet and shutting the door.

It takes me a quick second to put on the outfit, the shirt is a little tighter than the last time I tried it on, but still fits. Just slim now.

And the skirt is a little more filled out since the last time I wore it too.

I step out and Caroline’s eyes immediately widen. Along with an ever growing smirk on her lips

“Shut up caro, seriously does this make me look like a slut?” I ask moving towards my full body mirror on my wall,

“No it doesn’t,” Caroline says moving towards my front

she takes another step foward towards me and reaches for my shirt, without giving me time to process, she’s unbuttoned 2 of the buttons on my shirt making the shirt open a little farther down, showing some cleavage, a lot more then I’m used too.

“are you kidding! I should just wave a sign saying ‘look at my boobs! There hanging out for all to see!” I shout at her,

“Shut up Azzi, it’s not that bad it’s stilll enough to make people stare, but not too much to make people judge” Caroline says taking a step back to look at me fully.

I turn back around to the mirror, and maybe she’s right,

I look diffferent, the skirt hugs my hips and brings out my curves along with the very slim fitting shirt that shows my defined body.

Maybe she knows what she’s doing.

6:37 PM

“Okay, okay now my hair, please help” I say taking my eyes off my reflection turning to look at Caroline.

“Just sit down, I know what to do, do your makeup while I do this. And none of that ‘just mascara shit’ your pretty without any makeup of course, but were going for a new Azzi tonight.” Caroline says while pulling out the chair to my vanity.

I have a lot of makeup yes, but I rarely use it, I mean, I’m an athlete, I just simply don’t have the time for it, or need.

But tonight. As I sit down and look in my vanity mirror, I wanna do something different,

While i’m applying a layer of concealer under my eyes, Caroline starts on my hair.

abut 10 mintues later, were both done. My makeup surprisingly looks petty good, it’s not anything crazy but it’s more then usual,

I have some concealer on, highlighter and some nose contour plus bronzer. Along with some winged eyeliner and mascara over my long lashes. I top it off with a darker lipgloss, and look in the mirror.

Caroline has done my hair perfectly,

Pulling it up with a claw clip, and slicking it back with two birds in the front framing my face, It looks beautiful but also effortless.

My hair being pulled up means you can see more of my chest and neck, which still are nice and tanned from the summer.

I can’t even think anything else before Caroline chimes in.

“If i was gay, i’d low key eat you out right now.”

“Caroline!!! What the hell” I say taken back by her out of pocket comment.

“No like totally Azzi, you look stunning. Your so pretty, I think your out doing me, which I hate for me but love for you.” Caroline says while placing her hands on my shoulders.

I stand from my vanity glancing at the time again, even if I didn’t like my appearance i’d have no time to change it, it’s 6:50 and we have to go now.

Me and Car both grab our wallets and phones, and put on our shoes and head out to the car.

Shortly we arrive to the restaurant, it’s pretty packed but our team has a reservation,

Me and Caroline walk in together and are taken back by the restaurant. I’m thanking the gods for putting some time into my apprernce because its a lot nicer then I expected.

The employees are all in suits and the whole building is dimly lit, only by some candles spread out and chandeliers over the bigger tables.

Outside, the sun has already set making it a little darker,

“hey Azzi, Car! Over here!!!” KK shouts

Clearly being KK she’s not phased by the looks she gets from people trying to enjoy there dinner in a peaceful manner, but that doesn’t matter.

I look over at the table, the rest of my team is already sat,

Me and Caroline share a look before beginning to walk over.

The team all look up and greet me and Caroline as we sit down.

I take a seat near the end of the table with one more open seat next to me and Caroline sits to my right.

I glance around the table and notice there’s a person missing, a certain blonde is left out of this group.

Just as I notice this ice grabs my attention.

“Damnnnnnn Azzi, didn’t know you could clean up this well, you looking like a snack!”

This statement by ice causes most of the attention from the table to fall on me, which quickly overwhelms me

The girls all say different versions of compliments, or at least I think compliments, some might be harssasing me?

Just as the harassment and fawning is in its peak a voice cuts through,

“What are we gushing over guys?” Paige says while walking toward the table.

My stomach does an unwelcomed flip.

Paige has her hair slicked back into a bun, with black and grey Jordan’s on, a simple silver chair peaking out over a gucci all black polo.

“Oh hey P, we’re just talking about how delicious Azzi looks, don’t you agree?” Ice replies,

Paige takes a seat without noticing me, sitting right next to me while I talk to Caroline, noticing her sitting next to me ,I subconsciously turn towards her.

“Hey P” I say coming out a little softer then I expected,

Paige doesn’t even reply, she just simply looks at me, her sight falling up and down taking in my whole body.

her eyesight falling right on my cleavage for a second too long, a shade a red starts to creep onto her cheeks and her neck.

“uh hi,—sorry, hey A-Azzi” Paige says reverting her eyesight to the widow quickly.

I take a mental note of this, and turn back to ice seeing that ice and KK are already staring towards me and Paige.

“Paige Bueckers, are you blushing right now!” KK shouts while laughing and pointing towards Paige,

This statment makes ice catch on too.

“She totally is! She just checked Azzi out!! Can you believe it, the rizzler Paige buckets starts stuttering over Azzi fudd.” Ice says in an exaggerated tone.

“Yo, shut up I’m not, I just, had something stuck in my throat” Paige says to them still not making complete eye contact.

“Ha sure, okay” Ice says throwing her hands up in mock surrender.

With this the table continues to have have side conversations, and start to forget about Paiges … situation.

“So, you’re not dead?” Paige says to me

“No i’m not, thanks to you.”

“No problem, I’ll always help, yknow, you were scarring me last night, you looked genuinely like a dead body.”

“Shut up P. I did not, i’m sure I looked stunning, per usual”

“Yeah, you kinda still did.” Paige says mumbling

“Aw paigeyy, did you just say that I’m the prettiest person you’ve ever seen even when I’m drunk?” I say batting my eye lashes obnoxiously,

Of course I’m teasing Paige because in reality, I have no clue why Paige said that, and I have no clue why on earth Paige was blushing while looking at me ,all I know is that I don’t want it to stop.

“Oh shut up Az, that’s not what I said at all and you know it” Paige says regaining gin her normal confident tone and smirk,

Soon after she says this, a waiter appears at our table. Right behind me.

“Hi y’all, i’ll be your sever tonight, my name is Marcos, and-

I turn around and meet his eyes when he stops his sentence.

“uh-uh yeah like I was s-saying,, um are you guys ready to order drinks?”

I hear ice snort and KK elbows her while looking down biting back her own laugh.

clearly the table is waiting for someone to speak up as the “designated speaker for the night” and reluctantly I start speaking.

I lock my eyes onto his and notice, he’s kinda cute, he’s pretty tall from what I can gauge in my seat, and he has wavy dark hair loose, but cut nicely, he so looks pretty in shape and his button up fits pretty snuggly around his arms.

ignoring this I start talking,

“Hi Marcos nice to meet you, excuse my friends, they don’t know how to behave, but I think we’ll all just have waters, maybe with some lemon in them, please.”

“Y-yeah, i’ll go grab those” Marcos says still making direct eye contact with me,

He lingers for a beat too long before disappearing into the restaurant.

I hear laughter being let out as soon as he’s out of ear shot.

“PSHHH Azzi, keep it in your pants” KK says raising her eyebrows up.

“yeah Az, that guy was eye fucking you,” Ice says before bracing her hands on the table,

“All right y’all, I got 20 saying Marcos asks Azzi out before the end of the night, whos in” Ice says to the table

“Ice!” I yell at her as a warning,

But I look around and see the majority of the table with the same expression all fumbling in their wallets and letting out quips about how he will or won’t.

I turn to complain to Caroline but am met by a horrid sight,

“Caro! Are you seriously betting on me right now.”

“Sorry Az, but it felt like I was interrupting something” She says shrugging.

My head falls into my hands but suddenly I feel tension to my left.

Paige is sitting there looking down at the table with an expression I’ve never seen on her face before.

“P, you good? You look like you wanna punch something.” I say putting my hand on her shoulder

“I’m good, Azzi.” Paige says coldly while pushing my hand off her,

A wave of hurt courses through me at this action, before I can say anything Marcos returns.

“Here you go,” He says while placing waters in front of each person, making his way down the table

“and here you go, gorgeous.” He says while putting the water directly infront of me before disappearing back into the restaurant.

Before I can react, Paige jolts up and starts walking fast towards where I can asssume the bathroom is.

“What’s her deal?” Ice says to Nika.

“I don’t know, but I have an idea.” Nika says while leaning back in her chair watching Paige go.

After a few mintues Paige returns and slips back into her seat.

“Hey”

“Hi.” Paige coldly returns

“You okay there?” I ask leaning into her space a little.

“Yeah Azzi, you don’t have to keep asking me.” Paige replies while reaches for her phone and looking down at it.

Feeling slightly rejected I turn to Caroline, tapping her on the shoulder.

I make a face at Caroline, gesturing towards Paige slyly.

Caroline answers by slugging her shoulders up, telling me she doesn’t know why she’s acting this way either.

I decide not to let it way on me too much, I know that something’s wrong with Paige, but I also know Paige won’t talk about it, especially in public.

Minutes pass that are filled with laughter and conversation as the group warms up more.

Another sever comes around to take or orders and Ice makes a quick comment asking where the “cute server” went.

The other waitress saying he went on break, but she’ll send him back if we want.

before anyone can say anything ice starts nodding her head and then places her order.

Conversation continues after our food order was placed, and it seems to be a good night, expect for Paige being uncharacteristically quiet, giving short answers or simply ignoring everyone whilst being on her phone tuned into a live NBA game.

After a while Marcos returns with the other waiter both holding food in their hands.

The waitress starts on the other end of the table while Marcos starts by putting food down to Caroline, skipping me and putting Paiges food down next, after this he returns back to me and sets my food down with a comment, “Best for last” he says with a wink.

I bush a little, caught off guard by the comment, so I send him a smile while turning around to my food.

“OOOOOhhhh” KK says while looking at me

“KK shut up” I say through my smile,

“Both of you shut up.” Paige cuts in

The table falls silent but it doesn’t seem to bother her, her eyes remaining on her NBA game,

The girls including me all look around at each other before quietly making conversation again,

Nika pulls out her phone and starts typing on it.

Shorty after I hear a notification chime on Paige’s phone which is met with her standing up, and Nika at the same time,both of them disappearing back towards the bathroom.

Once they are far enough I turn to KK,

“What is happening, it’s like Paige got a stick shoved up her ass.”

“I don’t know, ask Nika later, she seems to know more than us.” KK replies with picking up her food and taking a big bite.

Marcos come back, check in hand.

“Hey guys sorry to interrupt, but here’s the check for whenever you need,”

He places the check down in the middle of the table and ice nods at him, signaling she heard him,

With that I see him turn towards me.

I suddenly get a sinking feeling in my chest,

“Um, this is strange but you’re stunning, and I was wondering if I could get your number?”

My breath gets caught, I was not expecting that.

“Umm yea, Yeah sure.” I say fumbling for my phone.

I don’t know why i’m saying yes, but it’s like my brains on autopilot.

Give him my phone, open on contacts and look over at ice whos collecting 20 dollar bills.

I can’t do anything but roll my eyes before Macos gives me my phone back.

“Thank you, hope to see you soon, “ He say with a wink, while walking backwards and turning towards the back of the restaurant.

“I TOLD YALLL!” Ice shouts while waving her new 20 dollars bills at her self.

“Shush ice just eat your food.” I say rolling my eyes.

Caroline nudges me and nods her head up, making me tun around,

Paige and Nika are walking back towards the table.

Paige is walking, lacking her normal confidence, her mind seems somehwere else, and Nika looks, well, pissed to say the least.

They both sit down without saying anything and the table shares looks between each other.

With this new enegery the team eats quietly,

Before anyone can do anything. Paige throws 4- hundred dollar bills down on the table and gets up. Walking towards the door.

Nika huffs and gets up, following Paige.

The team watches them leave and get into their car, Nika starts driving off almost immediately.

Ice turns back from the window and claps her hands with an exhale.

“Well y’all, I guess dinners paid for, and I guess we’re done!” She says while nudging KK

No ones really wanting to stay after the disaster of a dinner we had, everyone starts making there way towards to exit while speaking low, presumably about Paiges dramatic exit.

It’s just me and Caroline remaining, and we start heading towards our car.

In the middle of our quiet drive back I get a text,

Marcos(server): Hey, would you be interested in dinner next weekend? :)

[wintfleur]

stella texting her brothers what she is doing daily and them being like ?? 😭😭 (tiktok trend)

𝓇oro's note. EEEK I’ve been wanting to do this, so thank you for reading my mind!!

6:10 am

stink 👧🏻

just woke up

quinny bear 🧸

good morning stella did you sleep well? It’s pretty early

don’t answer, proceed with caution ‼️

go back to bed.

evil twin 🫎

didn’t ask, but good morning

trevyyy 🙄

new rule, no texting in gc before 10

7:45 am

stink 👧🏻

just got back from my run with mark and now I have to rush to get ready, I forgot I had an early class today ☹️

don’t answer, proceed with caution ‼️

i bought you a calendar, use it?

evil twin 🫎

I thought you didn’t run on the days you do pilates?

stink 👧🏻

mark asked me to join him and I didn’t want to say no :p

quinny bear 🧸

don’t overexert yourself stella 👍🏻

8:27 am

stink 👧🏻

just got to class!! almost late 😅

trevyyy 🙄

stella please I just wanna sleep 😭

don’t answer, proceed with caution ‼️

I don’t care stell

quinny bear 🧸

don’t be rude jack

don’t answer, proceed with caution ‼️

don’t tell me what to do, quinn 🫵

trevyyy 🙄

ITS 5 AM FUCK OFF

evil twin 🫎

lol

3:35 pm

stink 👧🏻

finished my classes for the day, going to practice ⛸️

don’t answer, proceed with caution ‼️

make sure to stay hydrated 🫵

quinny bear 🧸

be careful

trevyyy 🙄

kick their asses!

evil twin 🫎

who’s asses?

trevyyy 🙄

man idk, I’m jst trying to be supportive 🤷‍♂️

7:45 pm

stink 👧🏻

finished practice, gonna shower now

don’t answer, proceed with caution ‼️

i literally don’t care?

evil twin 🫎

okay leave me alone ❤️

quinny bear 🧸

that was a long practice stella, get some rest!

trevyyy 🙄

asses kicked?

stink 👧🏻

YEP 😇

trevyyy 🙄

THATS MA GIRL!

8:40 pm

stink 👧🏻

at the art studio to work on my project

evil twin 🫎

how do I unsubscribe ‼️

quinny bear 🧸

good luck 👍🏻

trevyyy 🙄

bro do you rest?

don’t answer, proceed with caution ‼️

LEAVE ME ALONE

10:48 pm

stink 👧🏻

finished my project

don’t answer, proceed with caution ‼️

im going to block you (good job tho)

quinny bear 🧸

send me a pic I wanna see

did you eat dinner?

it’s late are you going back to your dorm?

stink 👧🏻

and yes I ate, daisy brought me some dinner

ethan is picking me up rn!

evil twin 🫎

quinn how does it feel to know that you bought stella a car she never drives 🎤

trevyyy 🙄

kinda freaky but that looks great stellur 👍🏻

stink 👧🏻

LUKE SHUT UP I DRIVE LIKE ALMOST EVERY DAY 🖕🏻

don’t answer, proceed with caution ‼️

okay so we all know that’s a lie

quinny bear 🧸

that looks amazing stink

stop antagonizing stella, luke 🙄

stella literally drives better then you jack.

don’t answer, proceed with caution ‼️

HEY?

why tf am I catching strays

stink 👧🏻

strays?

more like catching fucking tickets with your shit driving 🥳

trevyyy 🙄

were you silent or SILENCED 🤭

evil twin 🫎

DAMN 😮‍💨

don’t answer, proceed with caution ‼️

I’m blocking all of you 🖕🏻

11:13 pm

stink 👧🏻

facetiming with rut n doing homework ��️

trevyyy 🙄

hmm homework, that’s what they all say 👀

evil twin 🫎

I love you stella I really do, but I don’t care ❤️

quinny bear 🧸

it’s really late stink

get some rest please 🩷

don’t answer, proceed with caution ‼️

I WANNA REST 😠

but miss yapper won’t leave us alone!

12:46 am

stink 👧🏻

going to sleep

goodnight big bros I had a great day talking with you, love you all 🩷

don’t answer, proceed with caution ‼️

ur such a brat

you can’t annoy me all day then make me forgive you in a second by being cute 😑

I love you too bug 🩷

evil twin 🫎

sweet dreams sis ily2 🩷

trevyyy 🙄

GAHHH ‘BIG BROS’ 😩

goodnight stella 🥹

quinny bear 🧸

sleep well, you had a long busy day and you need your rest. I love you too stink 🩷

stink 👧🏻

𝓇oro's note. Stop because i had so much fun doing this, id like to do more of things like this!! 😻 a little look at a day in the life with stella! please tell me what you guys thought 🩷 that’s actually a pic of stella at the end btw

au m.list

˖ ་ taglist : @winterbarnesblog @toasttt11 @cixrosie @iceflwers @lesrflms @bunbunbl0gs @lovings4turn

©️WINTFLEUR ; you can't copy, translate, reproduce, repost my fic, use my plot or layout.

[sugarushwriting]

red flag jay

very angsty or somewhat

could’ve went into more detail but didn’t really want multiple parts

adult content!!! read at own discretion!!!!

wrote this months ago!! like early last year alongside heeseungs!! was supposed to write red flag enhypen for all 7 but only got to two of them.

don’t want this sitting in my drafts so here yall go for entertainment! not proof read or updated since i first wrote this months ago!!!

₍ᐢ. .ᐢ₎ ₊˚⊹♡

you sighed in exhaustion as you looked to the clock on the nightstand. 11:47 pm.

just once you wished your fiancé would come home to you before 9 pm.

before you agreed to marry him, the latest he’d had ever gotten home to you after work was 7 pm. after the engagement it became later and later.

he wasn’t cheating. you’d already went that route and followed him after 5 months of being sick and tired of him coming home late, wondering if he was already being unfaithful.

turns out, he was just a workaholic.

you were in a nice sleep when you finally heard the turn of the doorknob, and soft steps. jay was trying hard to get ready for bed without waking you.

too bad although you’ve given up on waiting for him every night, you still naturally woke up when jay came home. most nights you just didn’t let it show.

he kissed your forehead before he got into the bed behind you, wrapping his arms around you. he inhaled your scent, smiling against the back of your neck with a kiss.

“love you baby.” he whispered before he quickly got into a deep sleep himself.

you’ve known jay for about 2 years. dating him for 1, then getting engaged soon after. it’s just been a little under 6 months since saying yes to jay. 2 months since you both were intimate.

you lied awake, sighing in frustration. you knew jay had long work hours as he was partners in a travel company. that’s how you two met. you were on vacation, and his company happened to be the one you used. his team was conducting customer service surveys.

you didn’t mind you and jay weren’t intimate every night. because on the nights you both finally let out pent up frustration, you all would be intertwined with each other at all hours of the night.

the sun began to rise through the sheer curtains in your bedroom. jay would be up soon.

you got up and went into the kitchen to start the coffee pot and make sure jay had a lunch to take even though you knew he most likely would eat out.

you wondered why you even try anymore.

a kiss to your cheek startled you, followed by his morning voice, “morning my love.”

you mumbled, “morning.” a sassy undertone clearly present in your voice. for some reason you woke up extra pissed and petty. for good reasons.

jay chuckled, “what’s with the attitude?” he leaned against the opposite counter of you, crossing his arms.

you quickly whirled around, a frown etched on your face. “i don’t know jay.” you snapped with a shrug. “maybe i’m just missing my fiancé?”

“i’m right here.” he said confused, uncrossed his arms, gripping the counter.

“well you might as well not be! you seem more interested in your job than your own fiancé!”

jay sighed, “love, you know my job is very demanding, especially right now with holiday season coming up.”

“i know that jay, but it’s not fair!” you started to tear up. “i miss welcoming you home, and eating dinners together and watching tv before falling asleep in your arms.” a tear slipped down your cheek and jay immediately came to you to wipe away your tears and comfort you.

he kissed your forehead. “i’m so sorry love. i promise i’ll try to be home before 7 tonight.”

you smiled and nodded.

︶꒦꒷♡꒷꒦︶

6:55 pm you sat at the dinner table shaking your leg anxiously, checking the time every 3 seconds.

7:05 pm you thought he was probably stuck in late night city traffic.

7:35 pm you made the excuse that he was probably held up by a bad accident.

so you texted him.

you: jay is everything ok? is traffic bad?

8:15 pm you started cleaning up and getting worried he was maybe hurt

you: jay love are you ok? please let me know you are okay!

8:45 pm you were tempted to call around to different hospitals

9:25 pm you were furiously throwing items in a suitcase, wanting to commit murder yourself

future hubby!: love i am so so sorry…

you didn’t even finish the text before you threw your phone on the bed and grabbed a small suitcase.

tears streaming down your face, sobs coming out your mouth, you had to stop a few times to take deep breaths.

your mind and vision was so cloudy, full of hate, resentment, frustration, hurt, anger, and disappointment.

you were so focused, when you came out the bathroom carrying needed supplies, you hadn’t heard jay come in.

he looked at the suitcase with a confused expression and concern, then he looked at you. seeing your tears almost broke him.

“baby i am so sorry!” he began to say. you ignored him and kept packing some of your things. “baby, please listen!” he tried to grab at you but you pulled away and yelled at him to not touch you.

he said your name as sternly as he could. “this was a big meeting ok! i forgot it was with investors overseas, and this is very important for the company!”

you didn’t want to hear it. “you made a promise, jay.” you said softly not once looking at him.

“im sure i made a promise to try and make it home.” he pointed out and you stopped dead in your tracks. staring at him with cold and dead eyes.

“fuck. you.” you spat and went to zip the suitcase but jay stopped you by pulling you away.

you both nearly tussled over the suitcase until he grabbed your hands in his. “don’t be like that.” he said making sure to look you in your eyes.

“what am i supposed to be like then, huh?” you said angrily. “just be a good little house fiancé and soon to be housewife then soon to be stay at house mom? and be ok with my husband being at work at all hours of the day? while i stay home with our children who barely knows their dad?”

you were thinking of the future. your heart breaks thinking about raising the children and you jay were excited for all by yourself. if he stayed at work, his children would never know their dad.

“i’m doing this for you! for us! our future family!” jay shot back. “to make sure you get the best wedding, and have the best life! so that our kids have everything they want!”

“and if that means sacrificing time with you im sure our future kids don’t care about flashy things! i sure don’t! i don’t need or even want a big wedding jay!”

“and what? be ridiculed by my peers because my wife had a shotgun wedding?”

you gasped then scoffed. “are you doing this for me or for your peers to prove something, jay?”

jay stayed tight lipped. you shook your head in disbelief, the tension still high in the air.

you slipped by past jay grabbing the suitcase. he put his hand on it, stopping it from wheeling. “where are you going?”

“somewhere not here.”

“how you gonna do that, love?” jay narrowed his eyes, seeing red that you would dare leave him like this. “you have no family, no friends, no job, no money, no car. what you have is because of me. clothes, shoes, money, that car you drive, your phone. hell my friends are your friends.”

before you could react you slapped him. your engagement ring slightly cutting his cheek. he reached up to his cheek in shock not only because of the slap but because of what he said.

tears swelled up once again. this time anger tears. “fuck you jay! just fuck you! it’s all because of you!” you spat knowing you gave up your comfy life across the globe to take a chance with this man.

jays phone suddenly rang. he looked at the caller id with a sigh and his eyes looked at you apologetically. you knew it had to do with work.

“you answer that jay, and im gone.”

“if you leave, you leave with nothing.” he challenged.

he turned his back to you answering the call. what you wanted to do was throw the lamp at him. instead you grabbed your wallet with the only things that were truly yours, taking out his credit card and taking off your his engagement ring.

you saw your phone on the bed then remembered his words. so as quickly as possible with your wallet, you put your sneakers on in the living room hearing jays voice call your name.

“can you hold for just a second?” he said into the phone, coming into the living room watching as you put on your last shoe. “love, what are you doing!”

you ignored him as he alternated between yelling your name and talking to whoever on the phone.

without looking back you ran out the door of your shared apartment, opting to take the stairs as adrenaline ran its course.

jay was shocked, but his mind convinced him that you were standing outside the door waiting for him. how could you leave without a phone or keys?

he bid goodbye to the investors on the phone, his heart beating loud in his chest.

“haha, very funny baby.” he chuckled opening the front door hoping to see your smiling face.

instead he got an empty hallway.

that’s term panic finally settled in. running down the halls trying to find you, looking in the stairwell.

how could you just leave without your phone or keys? it was pouring outside! you could get sick! or hurt!

jay grabbed at his hair, muttering profanities to himself as he paced in the living room. again convincing himself that maybe you just went to the lobby to calm down, that you’d be back up in no time.

so he sat and waited the couch.

10:30 pm, 11:45 pm, 12:50 am, 1:30 am, time all went past, as jay alternated between the door, the clock, and his phone in hopes you’d find a phone to contact him.

at 6:30 am his phone startled him, a smile reaching his face thinking it was you. it was his alarm.

“baby,” he muttered to himself, a tear threatening its way down.

︶꒦꒷♡꒷꒦︶

park sunghoon, jays step brother, least expected to wake up to at 10 at night due to scattered knocks from you.

seeing you drenched in rain, sunghoon sighed, opened the door for you and let you cry on his couch.

little did jay know was that you had picked up shifts at the ice skating rink sunghoon owned by working front desk. you were bored and sunghoon needed the help in between when the college students couldn’t make it.

the next morning you looked a mess compared to sunghoon’s polished look.

“you look like trash.”

you rolled your eyes drinking your hot beverage. “jeez, thanks a ton sunghoon.”

sunghoon chuckled, hoping just the slightest teasing could cheer you up. he knew about his step-brother’s workaholic tendencies and even warned him once he made it official with you to not jinx it.

you stared into nothing, last night over playing in your head. you told sunghoon everything that happened, hence why you came empty handed and without a ring.

“he’ll come to his senses.” sunghoon offered.

“even if he apologizes, it’s going to take more than that.”

︶꒦꒷♡꒷꒦︶

days passed, and jay felt so lost not having you in his space. not having your body present. your kisses. smiles. laughs.

he realized he was neglecting you.

he met up with his friends heeseung and jake, and his step brother, sunghoon.

jay nearly started a bar fight when he smelt your scent on sunghoon. mind immediately thinking the worst he started throwing insults, sunghoon sitting quietly until jay spat an insult about you.

sunghoon punched jay.

heeseung and jake immediately interrupted.

“your drunk brother. watch yourself before you lose her for good.”

“how dare you steal my happiness from me!”

“i stole your fiancé not your business.” sunghoon smirked.

jay went to lunge at sunghoon but his friends stopped.

sunghoon didn’t want to reveal you were staying with him out of respect for you. “jay, she works for me. she came to me bored, wanting to busy herself so i offered her occasionally shifts when my handy college students couldn’t make it.”

“is she safe?” jay was on the verge of sobbing as he grabbed sunghoon by the collar.

sunghoon hates to lie. “from what i know, yes. i don’t know much other than she came to work not looking like herself.”

“can—can i see her?”

“you come on my business property and i’ll knock your teeth out.” sunghoon removed jays grip. “she’s upset, just let her work through this.”

︶꒦꒷♡꒷꒦︶

and that you did. occasionally receiving flowers from jay at sunghoon’s business. different letters and notes with each bouquet.

baby, sunghoon threatened to knock my teeth out and i believe him. he said not to come to the property but that doesn’t mean i can’t send you flowers

baby i miss you so much. i miss your cuddles and hugs

love, i hope you’re doing ok?

and many others. he even sent his credit card with one of the notes, which you gave to sunghoon to give back to his brother.

jay was hoping you’d use it so he would know which hotel you were staying at.

he sent you your phone, which you turned on only to contact family back home, then turning it back off.

he sent you your favorite shirt of his you like to wear at night. you kept it.

jay was still losing his mind and decided a week was enough and he went to sunghoon’s rink, consequences be damned.

he stood in the shadows by his car, smiling when he saw you come out the door to throw away garbage. his smiled faded when he saw a younger man approaching you to help you lift it into the dumpster, his hand on your lower back to close to comfort.

“i thought i told you i’d knock your teeth in.” sunghoon threatened.

jay turned around pointing to the young man. “who’s that?”

“sunoo. don’t worry, he’s one of the college students and already in a relationship he has no thoughts of jeopardizing, unlike you asshat.” sunghoon gripped the back of jays neck walking him towards the drivers side. “i’ll see you at the bar.”

by the time heeseung, jake and sunghoon got to their regular bar, jay was 4 drinks in, cheeks flushed and, crying?

“i miss her so much man!” jay sobbed.

“dude, you started without us?” jake asked disappointed.

“i couldn’t handle the thoughts of missing her man, but the alcohol made it worse!” jay cried. “i haven’t been able to focus at work! embarrassing myself in front of my partners and investors!”

“yeah, we know.” heeseung and jake said in unison taking a sip of their respective drinks.

they were jays partners for the company, and never have they saw him such a mess at work. suits, socks not matching. sometimes shoes not matching. hair barely brushed. ties always crooked. he was making more mistakes than usual.

“about that, we need to talk.” heeseung cleared his throat.

“jay, we are not asking but demanding that you take some time off.” jake began.

“we can’t ruin this opportunity with important holidays coming up and the opportunity to making nearly triple what we did in the past year.”

jay sighed, emptying his cup asking the bartender for another. “how do you guys always get home before 6?”

“we have boundaries, jay.” heeseung stated. “we understand this business is important to you because of your father, but is it more important than losing your future life with someone you love?”

“jay, you have heeseung and i as partners. we share the business responsibilities and burdens. we also agree it’s time we talk with our employees and other partners to let them know we are setting boundaries for everyone’s health.”

jay listened as he continued to cry. sunghoon had begged you through text to come and get his brother before he ends up on the curb.

sunghoon-in-law: please come get jay. heeseung jake and i are about to kick him to the curb if he continues to sob like a toddler about wanting and missing you

in no time you made your way to their favorite bar knowing they really would put him to the curb.

when you said jays name, he swore he was dreaming. “it’s me jay.”

“please make sure he doesn’t vomit himself to death.” heeseung said.

when jay turned to meet your eyes, he almost cried again until sunghoon groaned. “please get him out before we get kicked out!”

you laughed, helping jay to his car, taking his keys from his pocket. thankfully jay was sorta able to walk.

the drive home was quiet other than jay ranting to himself about random things and how much of an idiot he is.

when you pulled into the apartment garage you softly shook him, he looked your way with a smile. “my angel, you’re still here.”

you smiled and nodded. “let’s get you home.”

“don’t leave me, please.” jay pouted.

“i won’t jay.”

you helped him out of the car and to the apartment. “here jay, we’re at your apartment.”

jay shook his head correcting you, “our apartment.”

you ignored his comment, walking in the home the familiar scent of jay greeting your nose. although he was a mess lately, thankfully the apartment wasn’t.

you got to the bedroom with jay noting he hadn’t made the bed.

“i didn’t make the bed—hiccup—because i know you like it done a certain way.”

you helped him into the bed. as you went to walk away to grab some water he held on tight to your hand. “you said you wouldn’t leave me.”

“i’m not jay, i’m going to get you some water.” you replied and moved his hair from his forehead.

that night you helped him take medication and get ready for bed, helping him out of his outside clothes. him giggling like a schoolboy making jokes about you getting him naked.

“sleep with me, love.”

“jay—,”

“please.” he grabbed your hand, rubbing his finger where the engagement ring should be. the scar on his cheek still healing and a reminder how he treated you.

you had no energy to argue, so you nodded and reassured you were going to change into one of his shirts and come back.

jay stayed awake until you came back to him, the ring in his hand. he slipped it back on, begging you not to take it off. you both laid side by side facing one another.

“i know i have a lot of apologizing to do, and we need to talk. but just know i care about you and our future children more than the business.” jay sighed against your lips. “for the rest of my life i’ll be making up how i treated you. my mother did not raise me that way. she would disown me if she knew the way i treated you.” jay kissed your forehead.

“go to sleep now jay, we can talk about it in the morning.”

“can we also start making babies tomorrow?”

you laughed, hitting jays shoulder. “sure jay.”’

“i love you.”

“and i love you.”

₍ᐢ. .ᐢ₎ ₊˚⊹♡

[littlexdeaths]

𝕝𝕖𝕥’𝕤 𝕘𝕠, 𝕕𝕠𝕟’𝕥 𝕨𝕒𝕚𝕥 (𝕥𝕨𝕠)

eddie munson x shy fem reader

warnings: lots of cute first date jitters, reader is clumsy, also a lot more cheese 🧀 — take your lactaid besties.

part one | part three

let’s go, don’t wait masterlist

a/n: i’m honestly blown away by all the sweet comments on that first little blurb. shy reader is 1000% me, so this is very near and dear to my heart. i hope y’all like this one just as much! also big kisses to my lovely angel @undead-supernova for looking this over for me <3

“This looks stupid.”

You huff, glancing at your reflection before rushing back over to your closet for the 3rd time in a span of twenty minutes.

But Nancy grabs your wrist from before you can make it there, pulling you down onto the bed beside her.

“Everything you’ve tried on has been cute… I don’t see the problem here.”

You groan and flop back onto the mattress, covering your face with your hands.

“I wasn’t exactly trying to go for cute, Nance.”

Your words are muffled behind your palms, but she gets your message loud and clear.

“I know you want to impress him, but my best advice is to just be yourself… that’s why he asked you out in the first place, right?”

You sigh, uncovering your face to look up at her. She has a brow raised, and as much as you’d hate to admit it— you know she’s right.

“Do you always have to be right about everything?” you puff out a small laugh and she beams, nudging your knee with hers.

“Of course, I am the brains of this operation, remember?”

You roll your eyes fondly before returning to your feet, smoothing over the denim of your skirt when you meet your reflection once more.

“Oh god, what about make up?!”

You only managed to change your shirt one last time before Nancy had to practically barricade your closet door shut with her body. Reminding you that, once again, you looked great.

It doesn’t help much to soothe that little voice in the back of your head that disagrees— but the rumble of an engine and a blaring guitar riff distracts from those thoughts momentarily as the panic finally starts to set in.

“Shit, shit, shit! He’s here already?” you squeak, glancing over at your beside clock.

6:45 pm.

He was 15 minutes early.

“He’s early… color me impressed.” She grins before peeking out your curtains.

“I’m… I’m not ready, Nance.”

Your heart is about to pound out of your chest and your palms are beginning to sweat. She steps away from the window to put her hands on your shoulders, face full of determination.

“Just breathe, okay? I’ll go down and let him in, you just take a minute and come down when you’re ready.”

You nod dumbly, eyes widening further when the doorbell rings.

Eddie’s here… actually standing on your front porch. Bouquet of flowers grasped tightly in his own sweaty palms.

“Thanks, Nance.”

She just gives you a reassuring smile before starting down the stairs and opening the front door. To say Eddie is surprised when Nancy Wheeler appears at your front door instead of you is an understatement.

“Uh… please don’t tell me I’ve got the wrong address,” he steps back to take a look at the number on the house again.

“No, you’re at the right place. She’s just finishing getting ready, come on in.”

Nancy can see the way his shoulders sag in relief before he steps past the threshold. Dark eyes wandering around the interior of your entry way in utter curiosity. Pictures of you and your parents line the walls, but one in particular catches his attention.

You’re smiling up at the camera, eyes scrunched closed behind the round frame of your glasses— with your two front teeth missing.

The sight has him grinning despite himself, already catching more of a glimpse of the girl that’s been on his mind for the better part of that year.

“So… where are you taking her?” Nancy asks casually, leaning against the doorframe of your kitchen.

Eddie turns then, still clutching the flowers tightly in his fist.

“The Palace… and then Benny’s. But don’t worry, I’ll have her back before 11 pm. Scout’s honor.” He grins, raising his other hand in a mock salute.

You can hear their voices floating up the stairs, which only seems to worsen the butterflies fluttering around in your stomach. You take one last look in the mirror to straighten your top and make sure your eyeliner wasn’t smudged before you turn the knob and make your way down the hall.

The creak of the floorboards alerts them both to your presence when you slowly begin to descend the stairs. Your hand grips the railing tightly, eyes finally lifting once you reach the landing.

“Wow,” he whispers in dumbstruck awe.

You can feel your skin warm under the intensity of his gaze, tucking your lower lip between your teeth to hide a grin.

But the sweet moment is quickly squashed when your foot catches on the edge of the step, and you go tumbling forward. Eddie drops the flowers in his haste before closing that short distance between you to catch you in his arms. Your bodies collide, much like what happened earlier in the cafeteria.

Only this time he doesn’t let you go right away.

“Steady now,” he chuckles, and your eyes can’t help but drift lower to stare at his lips. “You okay?”

You nod, not fully trusting your voice when he’s so close like this, you swear he must be able to hear how fast your heart is fluttering beneath your ribs.

“Oh goddammit, the flowers.” Eddie groans, making sure you’ve got your footing before he bends down to pick up the crumpled bouquet.

“Uh, I promise they weren’t like this when I got here...”

He hands them out to you with a sheepish grin, the apples of his cheeks now flushed a soft shade of pink. And from this close proximity you can see the faint freckles dotted along the bridge of his nose.

Man, he sure is pretty…

“They’re beautiful,” you smile, finally finding your voice. “Thank you.”

“… well, you two should probably get going, right?”

You had almost forgotten Nancy was even there.

“Oh what about—” you gesture to the bouquet in your hands, but she quickly cuts you off.

“I’ll put those in some water and lock up for you, sound good?”

You don’t have much time for protest when she carefully takes the flowers from your grasp and nudges you right into Eddie’s chest. You apologize between small giggles when he steadies you again, and Nancy disappears into the kitchen.

His eyes are almost sparkling in childlike delight at the sound of your laughter, and it’s something he’d like to continue hearing for a long time. Eddie guides you both toward the front door. His rings clink against the knob when he swings it open, taking a slight bow before motioning you forward.

“Your chariot awaits, mi’ lady.”

The Palace is packed by the time you arrive, but for a Friday night in Hawkin’s— that’s no surprise.

Young teens dart between the different games with renewed excitement while Keith watches on with a bored expression. Eddie’s hand is held loosely in your own, fingers intertwined while you decide what to play first.

You both agree on air hockey, allowing him to tug you toward the table with a newfound pep in his step. He hands you the blue paddle, teasing telling you that red is always his color before he crouches down to slip two coins in the slot.

“Prepare to be demolished, sweetheart,” he grins cheekily.

Your stomach flips at those seemingly innocent words, and Eddie silently pats himself on the back for how flustered he’s already made you. That’s not something he’s used to, making a pretty girl fumble over her words. But it’s something he’s decided he wants to see a lot more of tonight.

Eddie ends up winning two rounds of air hockey, but his victories were entirely due to the fact that you were so distracted. Poised across from him, you spent more time admiring the way his tongue poked out from between his lips in concentration— or when he had to pull his wild hair back into a bun when it kept flying into his face.

Not that you would ever mention that little fact to him.

“What’s next?” you ask, unable to hide your glee when he takes your hand without hesitation this time.

“Have you tried Dragon’s Lair?”

He nods his head over to the game that was just recently abandoned in a fit of rage by short boy with dark hair. If you were being honest, skee ball and air hockey were more your speed when it came to arcade games. But the look of absolute delight on his face has you willing to try regardless.

And just as you suspected, you’re terrible at it.

You’re barely able to get past that first level without dying repeatedly but Eddie continues to give you an encouraging smile while he leans against the machine. He adores the way your lips are pouted in a slight frown when the dragon engulfs the knight in flames again.

“Here,” he mumbles, sliding in behind you. “Let me help.”

His arms cage you in against the machine, and you can feel the heat from his chest seeping through the thin cotton of your blouse. Ringed fingers gently hover over where yours are stationed on the controls, and in your nervous state you don’t notice the way his fingers tremble slightly.

Eddie guides your hands with ease, all but playing the game for you at this point. But your focus is no longer on the dragons and knights. They instead settle on his hands, and how they completely engulf yours in size. And the way his chain bracelet rattles against your skin with each flick of his wrist on the joystick.

They continue to travel a little higher, noticing how the muscles in his forearms contract each time he pushes that red button in rapid succession. It has your mind wandering to places that it definitely shouldn’t be…

Like how his hands would feel gripping your hips…

Stop that.

When you take a shuddering breath, you get another whiff of his spicy cologne when he leans his head forward. The faint hint of tobacco and mint still lingers on his lips when he blows a breath out in frustration when he finally looses that round.

The words GAME OVER flash across the screen in brightly colored letters, and you feel a little disappointed when he begins to remove himself from you. But you’re suddenly feeling a little bold, gently turning to grab his hand before looking up at him.

“Show me again?” you mumble, chewing nervously on your lower lip.

Eddie grins down at you, eyes flicking down to your mouth for a fleeting moment. But his next move has your brain about to melt out of your ears.

He takes your lower lip between his thumb and forefinger, carefully removing it from between your teeth. He allows the pad of his thumb to graze over your lip while the other slips around your waist. Eddie guides you back around by your hips, quickly resuming his position behind you.

“Sure thing, sweetheart.”

taglist: @sheneedsrocknroll92 @blckbrrybasket @your-nightmaredoll @missmarch-99 @fandom-princess-forevermore

[mummyemmatojames]

30. A New Morning Rule: Waiting for Mummy

Hello, dear community! Emma here, your Mummy-in-training, with a small but sweet update on our MDLB and FLR journey. After my niece’s visit and sticking firm with our rules, I’ve been thinking about ways to refine our dynamic even more. This week, I reintroduced a rule from James’s toddler grounding that I’d loved—he now has to wait for me to get him up in the morning. It’s been such a delightful addition, and I’m excited to share how it’s going!

Why This Rule?

During the toddler grounding a few weeks ago, one of the rules was that James had to ask my permission to get up in the morning, and I’d forgotten how much I enjoyed that little ritual until recently. Lately, with his early 8:30 PM bedtime (routine starting at 7:30), he’s been waking up bright and early—sometimes as early as 6:00 AM—because he’s getting so much sleep. That’s great for him, but it’s been waking me up too. I’d hear him shuffling around, starting his day, or even coming to nudge me awake, and while I love his energy, I’m not always ready to jump out of bed that soon.

So, I decided to bring back the rule: he has to stay in bed and wait for me to come get him up. It fits his 10-year-old headspace perfectly—he’s still my little boy, relying on Mummy to start his day—and it gives me a bit more control over our morning rhythm. Plus, I remembered how much I loved going in to greet him during the grounding, and I wanted that back in our routine.

How It’s Going

I introduced the rule a few days ago, sitting James down after breakfast and explaining it. “Since you’re going to bed so early, sweetheart, Mummy’s going to come get you up in the morning from now on,” I said. “You stay in bed until I come in—no getting up on your own, okay?” He nodded, a little unsure at first—I think he likes his morning freedom—but he didn’t argue, especially after the grounding taught him I mean business with new rules.

The first morning was adorable. I woke up around 7:30, made myself a cup of tea, and then padded into his room. There he was, curled up under his train-themed covers, awake but waiting patiently like a good little boy. I smiled and said, “Good morning, my sweet boy! Mummy’s here to get you up!” His face lit up—he was so happy to see me, kicking off the blankets and reaching out for a hug as soon as I said he could get up. It was like he’d been holding his excitement in, waiting for that moment, and it melted my heart.

Since then, it’s become a little ritual I look forward to every day. I go in between 7:30 and 8:00, depending on when I’m up, and greet him with a big smile and some baby talk—“Did my little boy sleep well? Time to start the day with Mummy!” He’s always so eager to see me, grinning and stretching as I pull back the covers and help him out of bed. The first going I try and do is nurse him so we are instantly connected.  It’s such a sweet way to kick things off, and it sets a gentle, loving tone for the rest of our morning.

How It Fits Our Dynamic

This rule feels like a natural extension of our dynamic—it reinforces my role as Mummy, guiding him through every part of his day, even the start. With his early bedtime keeping him well-rested, it makes sense to balance it with a little more structure in the morning. It also gives me a chance to ease into the day on my terms, rather than being jolted awake by his footsteps or knocks. And for James, I think it’s helping him settle deeper into his little space—he’s so happy to see me when I come in, like he’s been waiting for that permission to begin, and it’s a reminder that Mummy’s in charge.

He hasn’t complained about it yet, which surprises me a bit—I thought he might grumble about losing his morning autonomy. But so far, he seems to enjoy the routine. Yesterday, he even giggled when I tickled his feet to “wake him up” (though he was already awake), and this morning, he whispered, “I like when you come get me, Mummy,” as we headed to the kitchen. I think the consistency and attention are sinking in for him, just like they did during the grounding.

A Small But Meaningful Change

It’s only been a few days, but I’m already loving this new rule. Greeting my little boy each morning feels so special—like I’m setting the stage for a day full of care and connection. It’s a small tweak, but it’s making our dynamic feel even more complete. I’m also glad it’s solving the practical issue of him waking me too early—now I get my quiet moment with tea, and he gets a little extra time to rest or just lie there waiting for me, which seems to suit him.

What Do You Think?

I’d love to hear from the community—have you tried a rule like this, making your partner wait for you in the morning? How did it change your mornings, and did they settle into it like James seems to be? For those with early bedtimes, how do you handle the early wake-ups? And if you’ve got other little morning rituals that tie into your dynamic, I’d love some inspiration—I’m on a roll with these sweet additions!

Thank you for being here as we keep building this beautiful life together. I love going in to greet my little boy each day—it’s such a perfect start.

With all my love, Emma (aka Mummy) 💕

[mirkopilled]

‪‪❤︎‬ Eating out ?! ‪‪❤︎‬ pt 1. | Aizawa shouta x fem!reader

word count: 1.6k

Tags/warnings: Aizawa x fem!reader (she/her pronouns used), SLIGHT nsfw in this part (it’s not too much but there’s going to be a lot more in the next part 😉), use of pet names (I.e. sweetheart, princess, darling etc.), pre established relationship, Aizawa is kinda a simp (love that)

This my first time writing a fic so I apologise if it’s kinda bad 😭😭 Also I didn’t proofread this as I’m going to bed now and I’m simply too tired.

pt 1:

You hummed joyfully to yourself as you got ready in the mirror, meticulously curling your hair, paying extra attention to your makeup and dousing yourself in coconut scented body oil until you were almost as reflective as the mirror you stood in front of.

Earlier today, Aizawa had texted you ‘Be ready by 6 PM’, followed by a link to a lavish restaurant that made your jaw drop just from the images available on google maps. It was unusual for Aizawa to select such a place, but ever since you mentioned it in passing (and how notoriously overbooked it is), he didn’t waste time trying for weeks on end to secure a reservation. If you wanted it, he made sure you were going to get. A small smile creeps up on your face at the thought of your boyfriend going to such lengths to make you happy. So much so you couldn’t help but squeal to yourself.

‘I take it you’re excited,’ He had a soft smile on his face as he leaned against the doorway. Aizawa’s gravel voice sent a slight shiver down your spine, making you jump slightly.

‘Shouta! I didn’t even know you there,’ You yelped, your face becoming slightly hot. Your eyes sheepishly scan your partner, who had nothing on but a towel that loosely hung to his hips. You eyes gazed over the soft look in his eyes that he only had with you to the stubble that adorned his face (that you found so so hot) to his broad, muscular shoulders often obscured by his hero costume. Strong, solid abs that led to happy trail that enveloped his lower stomach. Your sight show was cut short by the towel that obscured the grand finale. Although, a rough print was visible against the white towel which made your core throb.

‘What’s the matter, sweetheart?’ He slyly smirked, catching onto your staring long before even you realised you were staring.

‘Nothing!’ You chirped, your face slightly flushed and head guilty written all over it. Shouta came closer, the scent from the bath soap flooding your senses as placed his arm on your shoulder and leaned to kiss you softly on the cheek.

‘You look gorgeous,’ He spoke softly, admiring you in the mirror ‘Always so so beautiful, my pretty girl.’ He pecked your cheek once more, his stubble grazing your face. You lifted your hand to caress his face, pulling him closer. ‘Fuck, you smell incredible too.’ He buried his nose in neck as he took all of you in. God knows if you too are going to be able to make it to the restaurant! You giggle at your man, running your hands through his dark hair.

‘Thank you, hun,’ you glance at the clock: 5:42 PM ,’But we’re going to be late if we keep this up.’ His gaze meets yours, despite his eyes needy and indicating that he just might loose all self control, he gets up and heads to go get changed.

‘Yeah, I’ll be ready soon.’

He would be lying if Aizawa said that he wasn’t shocked that he had enough self restraint to make it to the restaurant without having his way with you. Alas, the two of you sat opposite each other under the warm lights and luxurious interior of the restaurant. The marble floors glissened beneath your gold heels and perpetuated a ‘clack’ ‘clack’ from the bustling waiters, zipping between tables holding various mouth watering dishes and beverages. The two of you were sat right next to the window which boasted a view of the busy street below and the summer night sky if you looked up.

The golden light kissed your features, your skin more glowy than ever, your eyes sparkled more than ever and your lips, god your lips, more kissable than ever. This didn’t go unnoticed by Aizawa, no far from that. Much like you were doing to him earlier, he was taking in every feature of you, basking in not only the light you radiated now but the light you had brought into his life. Ever since becoming close with you, he had thought countless times where has she been all my life?

‘Shouta,’ you signalled to the waiter that stood by your table. He was so lost in the sauce that he didn’t realise that he forgot he needed to order.

Fried shrimp, chicken katsu, dumplings and a plethora of other dishes had you leaning back against your chair and letting out a satisfying sigh.

‘You really outdid yourself, babe,’ you praise your boyfriend, he hums in response ‘It was so good, really lives up to the hype,’. At this point, any dishes had been swiftly sweeper up by the waiters and since you two entered, the place had died down a bit, the boisterous laughter and choir of conversations now melted into quiet murmurs of late night conversations.

‘It was really good, you made a good suggestion,’ Aizawa admitted, his eyes meeting yours once again, face flushed from the whine you two had and , well, your face (aw!). He cleared his throat looking outside. The sun had set quite a while ago, the early night blanketing the city.

‘It’s getting late,’ You say, stretching your arms out and yawning. The food you ate began to lull you to sleep and your half lidded eyelids dared to shut. The only thing keeping you awake was the alcohol that flowed through your system, making you feel warm all over. Your eyes languidly gazed at Aizawa, who was now also looking at you.

‘What?’ You giggle when you see your boyfriend so utterly focused on you.

‘Nothing,’ he hummed, eyes still scanning you. In reality, he was not fine at all. Not with you sat in front of him looking so perfect and pretty. Your body glistening and having him think about how glowy you look under your burgundy dress that he so desperately wanted to rip off of you. But he remained composed (for now). He readjusted his pants, he already had a semi just from looking at you. ‘Let’s at least get back home first’ he thought to himself, avoiding eye contact with you to avoid the situation in his pants getting worst, ‘We should get going now, dear.’ He said, trying desperately not to look you in the eye. Just on cue, a waiter came over to give you the bill and Aizawa swiftly paid, not wanting to waste any more time having to wait to be deep inside of you.

The elevator stops at the underground car park. The echoing from your heels is loud, but it’s as if you and Aizawa can hear the heels of your foot wailing in pain.

‘Babe,’ you look up at him with big doe eyes. Oh, you were going to kill him with that look.

‘What’s wrong princess?’ His hand coming to rest on your waist, ‘want me to carry you to the car?’ You eargely nodded and before you knew it, his strong arms scooped you up princess style. He didn’t even struggle carrying you to the car, which was quite the distance away. He kissed you forhead before placing you down, and opening the passenger door. You got in, followed by your boyfriend that placed his hand on your thigh almost immediately, as if there was a magnetic force.

‘I enjoyed today,’ Aizawa said before starting the car. Aizawa was not a man of many words, slightly more when he was with you but still far from the type to regularly talk your ear off (unless he was a scolding you). This statement made your heart flutter and you leaned in to kiss his cheek, painting a pink hue over them.

‘I love you, [name],’ there was a slight shake in his voice and a sharp breath, ‘And I’m sure now, I want to spend the rest of my days like this, with you.’ He turned to look you in the eyes. He was shaking slightly and his mouth began to dry up. Thoughts began to flood his mind, ‘why would I say that now? In the car?’. He was ready for the rejection that would follow suit. That you didn’t like him in that way and you weren’t looking for anything serious. The same liquor that had given him the slight confidence boost to say something like that you was now drowning his mind in negative thoughts.

There was silence for a while. It felt like a million years to Aizawa, who was going through 100 million ways this could go south. Time for damage control. ‘Forget that I even said anything, I know you don’t-‘

‘I love you too, Shouta,’ smiled softly, your heart beat quickened and cheeks flustered, ‘And I feel the same way, I want to be with you.’ Shouta’s eyes widened at the statement. No rejection? You feel the same way? Does this means you want to marry him too? He breathed a sigh of relief and pulled you in for a deep kiss, rough hands from hero work caressing your soft face.

‘I’m so glad you’re in my life.’ He sighed as he held you. Your coconut scent filling his nose again, making his cock twitch. He quietly groaned and let go of you, but not before you noticed the problem that was rising in his pants. You sit back in the car seat, smile still lingering on your face. ‘Ready you go now?’ He asked, shifting in his seat trying to make his erection not so prominent.

‘Mhm,’ you hum, excited for allll the positions Aizawa’s going to have you in tonight.

end

[soleauclub]

The Body Reboot Checklist: 10 Things to Do After a Week of Being a Hot Mess

by Soleau Club / www.soleauclub.com

You’ve been off your game. Maybe you were traveling, PMS’ing, binge-watching, or just living a little too loosely. Either way, you’re done feeling foggy, bloated, behind, and out of sync. This checklist is for the girl who thrives with structure, craves results, and isn’t afraid to hit reset like a wellness CEO.

It’s not about punishment. It’s about returning to your power. Let’s recalibrate.

1. Hydrate Like It’s Your Job

Start with 32 ounces of water the second you wake up. Add chlorophyll, lemon, or electrolytes to level it up. You need hydration to flush toxins, restore digestion, and rehydrate your brain after too many dehydrating choices.

2. Schedule a Digital Declutter Hour

Overwhelm starts with the mind. Clear your inbox, delete screenshots, organize your camera roll, and update your calendar. Mental fog often comes from digital chaos.

3. Move to Sweat, Not to Shrink

Choose a workout that makes you feel alive, not punished. Pilates, power walk, hot yoga, or a dance class—anything that gets you sweating and feeling strong again.

4. Reset Your Gut

Focus on clean, anti-inflammatory meals for the next three days. Think steamed veggies, probiotic foods, clean protein, and lots of fiber. If you went too hard on the takeout, your digestion needs a gentle detox.

5. Do a 15-Minute Mirror Routine

This isn’t about skincare. This is about realignment. Light a candle, put on music, and take time to get ready slowly. Touch your skin with intention. Say three self-respect affirmations out loud while you get ready. The goal is to reconnect with your main character energy.

6. Clean Your Space, Especially the Corners

Dust the baseboards. Wipe down the bathroom. Do the laundry. Strip your bed. Cleanliness is clarity. A spotless space instantly improves your nervous system.

7. Write a “This Week I’m Choosing” List

Create a short list of intentional actions you’re committing to. Example: “This week I’m choosing lemon water every morning, no sugar after 8 PM, and 3 outdoor walks.” Make it achievable, not overwhelming.

8. Get Sunlight Before 10 AM

Sunlight resets your circadian rhythm, which resets your mood and metabolism. Even 10 minutes on your balcony with tea or a journal can shift your entire energy field.

9. Do a Lymphatic Ritual

Dry brushing, gua sha, or a cold shower are amazing tools to stimulate your lymphatic system. After a messy week, your body needs help with drainage and detox. This is an underrated secret for feeling less puffy, more energized, and deeply refreshed.

10. Forgive Yourself, Then Romanticize Your Comeback

The reboot isn’t about perfection. It’s about falling back in love with your habits, your body, and your self-discipline. Wear the cute workout set, make your iced matcha in a champagne glass, journal like you’re the heroine in a French film. The vibe is self-respect with a little bit of sparkle.

Ready to Make the Reboot Permanent? Join the Summer Rebrand

If you’re serious about your glow-up and you’re so over starting over every Monday, it’s time to join the 3-Month Rebranding Program. It’s your step-by-step summer transformation guide designed to help you evolve into that girl, permanently.

Here’s what you get:

💻 84 Daily Lessons — bite-sized and beautiful, covering mindset, body, money, style, habits, and self-worth

📓 Hot Girl Homework — daily lifestyle tasks and rituals to turn your glow-up into a lifestyle

📱 Free Notion-style xTiles Digital Workbook — an interactive planning + tracking system you can access via app or laptop (organize your goals, track your progress, plan your day, and stay in alignment 24/7)

🖋 40-Page Printable Workbook — perfect for journaling, reflecting, and mapping out your rebrand like the main character you are

This program is for the girl who wants to wake up feeling clear, confident, and on track every single day—without burning out or playing small.

✨ Let’s make this summer your before-and-after story. Click [here] to sign up and start your rebrand today.

Because the hot mess era is officially over… and your evolution era just started.

[laylasverse]

GAME DAY ✶ 𝓑𝗘𝗧𝗧𝗘𝗥 𝗖𝗥

౨ৎ a regular day in my better cr except is a wednesday so it's game day ( high school girls basketball ) and also happens to be a snow day . . .

7:07 AM

i get woken up by my six-month-old kitten screaming in my ear for no reason. milo won’t let me sleep past seven in morning for actual no reason because i feed her at 11 am so it doesn’t even make sense. i usually just kick ( picking her up & move her, not actually kicking her ) her off the bed and go back to sleep.

on normal days i go to school for like two & a half hours because i only need one credit to graduate and i do online college classes. but today was a snow so i didn’t have to go.

10:30 AM

i actually start my day by showering and doing my daily routine, including feeding milo.

today i went to breakfast with my friend kennedy at a small coffee shop. i don’t actually like coffee, or coffee shops, but kennedy loves them so i always go with her when she asks. we always end up talking for hours on end. something about her makes me spill everything to her, ranging from how i hate ap calc to how i think im just playing a good person & not actually one.

we’ve been friends still elementary school so it makes sense how i just tell her everything under the sun.

12:16 PM

after breakfast / lunch i go over to jason’s house. he’s the middle child of a doctor & a engineer so he lives in the richest part of town ( literally all the way across town from my house lol ).

we spend time together doing absolutely anything. he likes to read while i do my puzzles. we might be a fifty-year-old married couple . . . but he keeps puzzles at his house that i do when i go over there. i’m currently working on a peacock feather puzzle on his bedroom floor. i love to watch conan o’brien reruns while i do my puzzles.

3:30 PM

jason has to go to basketball practice. i go back to my house and take a nap before i have to get up and get ready for the game.

6:00 PM

the old government teacher is my school’s announcer for home games. so he does the whole “senior number forty-four, layla mullis!” and i get to do my secret handshake with my favorite junior, my sister kara ( yes, she’s a junior on jv. i took all the ‘good at basketball’ genes ).

jason sits with my mom & stepdad in the stands. my stepdad is like 5’5 so jay literally looks like a giant sitting with them lol. he has to watch as i make literally all my threes but none of my freethrows. i got fouled like two times. i finished with fifteen points and made my best friend, stevie, dunk to beat the clock.

8:30 PM

me, stevie, jason, vinnie ( stevie’s bf ), kara, and carmen ( kara’s gf ) all go out to eat after the game. we went to our favorite mexican restaurant in town. while we were there i knocked over full cup of water. im talking a full glass of ice water. it went everywhere. all over my lap and jason’s jeans. a few ice cubes made it across the table to stevie too.

i might be a little bit clumsy. just a little itsy bit though, trust . . .

9:37 PM

i take my sister’s girlfriend home before actually going home to our house. by the time we got there jason was already upstairs in my room waiting for me. my parents let him stay over pretty often. i mean we’re both eighteen and about to graduate so like. my stepdad had this joke that jay can’t come over if i don’t win my games . . . haha very funny dad. 😐

for the rest of the night after i shower i get to listen to jason yap on and on about the drama he’s heard from his guys. he always has something new to tell me. it’s honestly so entertaining. then he falls asleep on me. he’s just a big breathing teddy bear.

౨ৎ : this was actually so fun to do

IB : this post by @ bkershft