#it'll all make sense on day seven. i hope.

[awordwasthebeginning]

Moonacre Week 2023

Day 05: Cave

1823

“Damn –”

Maria bit her lip to suppress the rest of a very unladylike curse and moved her hand to wave the smoke away. Of course she had dropped her torch. Was this her divine punishment for coming here alone?

She had been fascinated by the cliffs in the morning and had wanted to go exploring, but her uncle and governess had been in firm agreement that such a pastime was not suitable for a young lady.

Nonsense. If Mary Anning did it all the time, why shouldn’t Maria Merryweather?

So she had come back in the evening. Miss Heliotrope was in her room indulging in her digestion problems, and her uncle was…getting drunk in the billiard room, most likely.

She had been well prepared, dressed in sturdy shoes and wrapped in a warm coat over a dark riding dress. She had even though to light the torch at the edge of the cave, with one of those matches that nearly burnt her fingers off. Luckily, the sea wasn’t far.

But now, of course, she had dropped the god-damn torch, because a bat and a noise had scared her.

She might be able to find her way back without a torch, but there were more tunnels in the walls of the cave than the one she had come through, and some of them had looked quite narrow and steep, and who knows where they led? She would have to hope to find the right one in absolute darkness. Perhaps it would be better if she stayed right here and waited for the first group of tourists in the morning. Maria shuddered as she imagined it – the humiliation would be far worse than her uncle’s furious disapproval. And Miss Heliotrope, what would she say if she didn’t find Maria in her room in the morn-

There!

There was that noise again! Maria turned her head to listen.

A quiet shuffling sound, not far above the ground. Not an animal, it did not sound like fur or paws or panting. On the contrary, it might have been fabric, or leather, quietly scraping over well-worn stones. Human steps, quiet and slow, but steady and sure. Someone who knew the way.

Only the stories she’d heard about smugglers along the coast stopped her from calling out, “Hello! Is anybody there?”

Instead, she turned towards the sound, reached out her hand until she felt the cold rock under her palm, and followed the stranger’s steps as quietly as she could. It was madness, of course it was, but this entire endeavour of hers had been madness from the beginning.

If all else failed, she thought at the sight of the far opening of the cave, suppressing a giggle that was in equal parts hysterical and relieved, she could blame the full moon.

She stood still in the darkness. The moon was particularly full that night. Had it ever shone so bright before? She could see the way ahead, and she could see the stranger, tall and lean, moving across the uneven ground with the grace of a tightrope walker.

At the very edge of the cave, he stood and turned. The moonlight gave his silhouette a thin silver contour, but his face was still in the dark, so Maria could not make out his features.

Nevertheless – and she would later blame this on her full-moon folly – she took a step forward into the light.

For a second or an eternity, they stood there watching each other, like two ghosts in the place where one had died by the other’s hand.

Then the stranger turned and left, and Maria waited until she could not hear anything but the sea and her own heartbeat anymore.

[thornsnvultures]

everything I want...

bucky barnes x plus size!avenger!reader

summary: being sent on a mission with bucky should be a piece of cake, but he's been acting strange around you for weeks now and you have no clue why.

cw: SMUT, fingering, oral sex (fem rec), shower sex, p in v sex (unprotected), creampie, breath play, breeding kink, pregnancy/lactation kink (very little), possessive pervy bucky (he gets a bit feral in this one), solo masturbation mention (m), steve rogers meddling being a great wingman, angst with a happy ending, 4.4k words

a/n: my entry for the lovely @nickfowlerrr 's seven deadly sins event 🖤 Lust is the sin I chose for this fic and really it was an excuse to write filth lol I really hope you enjoy it! (and a quick thanks to everyone who encouraged me to keep going, this fic wouldn't be here without you)

18+ MINORS DNI

-----

"You'll be with Barnes for this mission. Get in, get out, no big deal. We've done this before and it doesn't look like it'll be much of a problem."

Steve smiles politely at you as he hands you the briefing folder with all the info on where you'll be going and why.

"If it's so easy why doesn't Barnes go alone?"

You regret opening your mouth as soon as the words come out, choosing to bite your lip and open the folder instead of looking at Steve's patented Look of Disapproval.

"Be ready and on the jet in two hours," Steve sighs.

"Yes, Captain."

Steve marches out of the room, always moving like a man on a mission even when he's not on one. No, this one's just you and Bucky. The man who's been avoiding you like the plague the last few weeks. Someone who you thought was at least a friendly acquaintance, a close colleague maybe.

He went from joking with you on the jet and bringing you coffee when he got one for himself from the canteen, to not even looking at you. Like even daring to lift his head when you walked by would get him booted from the team and sent back to Hydra.

You wouldn't say the two of you were close, but being a part of this team, working with these people; it was hard making friends with people who didn't understand, who didn't live on the compound. Sure there were SHIELD agents you saw here and there at the gym or around medical or the offices. But you saw Bucky damn near every day since you joined the team. And now out of the blue he was pretending like you didn't exist.

It didn't help that you had a not so teeny tiny crush on the man either.

Maybe this mission was a peace offering, Steve's way of getting the two of you to rebuild, reconnect. For the betterment of the team...or whatever. The sooner you got it done, the sooner you could get home and get away; from Bucky and from your own hurt feelings.

-----

Steve was right, the mission didn't take long at all. You were able to get in and get out with the information you needed with little to no fuss. Barnes was the perfect partner to watch your six with the way he was avoiding you and it totally didn't bother you that he hadn't said a word to you outside of what was strictly necessary. Totally.

When you got back to the hotel, Bucky got on the phone with Steve right away, still avoiding. He did need to call Steve to debrief, but he wasn't even saying much, just standing there with the phone to his ear, grunting every now and then.

Frustrated, you sat on the edge of the bed and pulled of your boots. Bucky was facing the window, looking over the city. The hotel room was modest, but modest for Tony Stark's standards was still luxurious and you wanted to take advantage of the shower that was practically the size of your bedroom back home before you guys left. You weren't waiting for Bucky to shower first.

"I'm taking a shower," you called out. Bucky made a noise but didn't turn around. His back muscles shifted against the tight black tshirt he wore when he shrugged at something Steve must've said over the phone. You couldn't hear what they were discussing but you could sense Bucky's tension from across the room. From the way he looked you'd think the mission was a failure, that he was reporting back with terrible news even though you know everything went well. Your fingers itched to rub soothing circles over his back, ease some of that tension away...

Shower, think of the shower. He doesn't deserve it.

Once you figured out which knobs controlled which of the four differently angled shower heads, you hopped in. Your clothes lay discarded on the sink as steam filled the room. It was heavenly. You'd have to ask Tony about installing a system like this in your apartment.

As you soaped up with the hotel body wash, your mind started to wander to the same person it always seemed to these days.

Part of why Bucky's sudden rejection was so painful was how much you'd grown to care about him. It felt silly, having a crush like this at your grown ass age, but that's what it was. Your stomach fluttering, your heart racing. You hoped he didn't know just how much he affected you every time he brought you coffee or talked to you or sat near you in a meeting.

Maybe that's why he's been avoiding you, maybe he caught on and...he doesn't feel the same way. Maybe he's trying to put distance between the two of you so you'd get the hint.

God, how embarrassing. You stand there with your hands on your chest, over your breaking heart, and try to hold it together instead of blabbering like a baby.

Of course he doesn't want you. He's a super soldier, practically a God. And he's been through so much. He's not the type to want a...girlfriend right now, especially someone on the team.

Suds drip from your breasts as you try to finish your shower, bending over to scrub your feet while you try not to cry. It's silly, silly and stupid. But you were hoping that even if he didn't like you that way, that you wouldn't lose a friend too.

The thought of him never speaking to you again makes a tear finally fight its way free and you choke out a sob as it falls down your cheek. You hope the pounding water is enough to mask your choking sobs but who knows. Your emotions are all over the place. You can't seem to stop crying and you're angry. Angry at Steve for putting you on this mission, angry at your tears and angry that Bucky might be totally lost to you.

-----

Bucky can smell you.

He stands by the hotel window, holding the bridge of his nose like that'll make it stop. It never does. You're always there, invading his senses. Not just your body wash or the shampoo you use, or the heavy floral stuff the hotel has stocked up in the bathroom. He's trying not to imagine you using the individually wrapped bars of soap to lather yourself up not twenty feet away from him, but just like his hand on his nose, nothing helps.

No, even under all the artificial stuff, it's you that drives his senses wild. Something encoded in your goddamn DNA that fries his brain.

It took him a while to figure out what it was that made it hard to be around you. He could ignore it at first, when you first joined the team. He was still fresh himself, finally coming back to be a do-gooder with Steve and the team after talking time to heal and scrape away what was left of Hydra's programming. There wasn't time to acknowledge the way his dick twitched every time you entered the room. It wasn't appropriate. And Steve would kick his ass for chatting up the newcomer anyway.

But as the weeks and months drew on, as he found himself getting more comfortable, more used to a routine that always seemed to revolve around you, he couldn't ignore it.

He felt like a dog in heat. Most of the time he could manage it, but there were days out of every month where he'd scramble for the nearest bathroom, broom closet, empty meeting room, anything after being with you for even five minutes so he could relieve himself. Biting his lip until he bled to keep from cursing your name as he worked his fist over his cock until there was nothing left.

It was maddening, the shift in your scent. He craved you constantly, but those times when his needs couldn't be ignored he felt out of control. Like he was a snap of your fingers away from becoming him again.

It wasn't until you left your phone unattended in the compound gym that things started to make sense.

You had been chatting on the treadmill with a SHIELD agent. Bucky pretended to be focused on his workout while he listened in to your conversation. Your agent friend was talking about her and her partner trying for a baby so you recommended a period tracker app that you had been using for a while.

"It's great! After you've been using it for a few months it can predict when you'll be ovulating for max baby making potential."

Your friend laughed at the saucy tone in your voice, Bucky nearly dropped the massive dumbell he was curling on his foot. Images of you, breasts heavy and leaking, swollen and pregnant with his child was all he could see. And fuck him, he wanted it, needed it, craved it.

So when your friend was gone and you hopped off the treadmill momentarily in search of your water bottle, leaving your phone behind, Bucky took his chance to sneak a quick look.

It was all right there. He remembers the last day he could smell you so strongly he could barely stand it. He almost got caught in the gym showers, slamming a crack into the tile wall when he came so hard his vision went black with the scent of you burned in his brain. He didn't see you for two days after that but when he did there was a coppery edge to your scent. And the app on your phone proved it.

You were ovulating. Your body was practically screaming for him, demanding that he do what he was made to do and breed your sweet cunt. His need to rut into you, to bury himself deep and pump you full of his cum over and over, no matter how long it took until it sticks, finally made sense.

Bucky already knew he cared for you, but he didn't want to scare you, overwhelm you. He wanted to do right by you, take you on dates, show you how special you are to him. But this feral need to claim you wasn't stopping any time soon either. Maybe, he thought, he should give you some space. Give whatever this feeling was done distance and it would calm down. Then...then he could tell you how he felt. He needed to clear your scent from his mind before he was trapped in a constant state of relieving himself by his own hand month after month, wasting what belonged to you in tissues and shower drains.

-----

So he stayed away, for an entire month at that, before Steve got sick of his shit excuses and put the two of you on this mission together.

"Whatever's going on with you two, you need to work it out. We're not in forth grade any more, Buck, you can't pretend a girl has cooties just cause you feel weird about liking her."

Bucky tensed as he heard her boots fall to the floor behind him.

"I don't-"

"Don't bullshit me, Bucky."

"Language," Bucky's lip quirked, almost a smile.

"I'm taking a shower," you called from the other side of the room. Bucky grunted, not trusting himself to say anything more. He could feel your eyes on him.

"Just talk to her. I know what you're gonna say, she deserves better than a jerk like you. But she doesn't deserve the cold shoulder."

Bucky shrugged, forgetting that Steve couldn't see him. He heard the bathroom door click shut and his forehead dropped against the window.

"You don't get it, Steve. She's different. I can't control myself around her. I'm hanging on by a thread here."

Steve sighs and says something else but Bucky barely hears it over the sound of running water and your clothes hitting the floor. 

"Bucky, you there?"

Shit.

"Sorry, I should...I gotta go."

"She likes you too, idiot." A part of him knew but hearing it out loud felt surreal. "I got the same senses you do. Better even," Bucky shakes his head at Steve's teasing, "I can hear her pulse pick up when she looks at you, how her breathing changes. How she sits close to you, touches you whenever she can."

Bucky shivers thinking of your hands on him, pulling him into your shower with you, letting him get close enough to touch you the way he's dying to touch you.

"And you know I can smell how wet she gets when y-"

"Watch it, Rogers," Bucky snaps with a growl in his throat.

"Then get your shit together, Barnes! She wants you too, you're not gonna scare her off."

Bucky wants to tell Steve he doesn't have any idea what he's talking about when he hears what sounds like crying coming from the bathroom. 

"Alright, if you're done playing matchmaker I gotta go."

Bucky hangs up before Steve can say another word and tosses his phone on the bed. Before he can think better of it his boots are off and he's pulling his shirt up and over his head. His heart is being torn to shreds with every sob that shudders through thin walls and he has the sinking feeling that it's all his fault.

-----

You don't hear the bathroom door open, but you feel the rush of cool air hitting your back. Before you can wipe away your tears and yell at Bucky for coming in before you were finished, he's right there. His hands grip your waist and turn you around.

"Bucky.

"Shh, I've got you."

He pulls you in, crushing you to his bare chest in a fierce hug. You don't know what's happening or why but he's here. Finally he's here and you're not gonna do a thing to stop it.

Your face is still wet with tears when he kisses you, consumes you, more like. His lips, teeth, tongue invading your mouth and begging you to open up and let him take all of you. You're shaking when he lets you go long enough to breathe, but his hands don't let you go, only wrapping around tighter and lifting you up against his broad chest when he feels your legs go weak.

It's everything you've every dreamed of, there's no way it's real. He's naked for fuck's sake. You can see his discarded jeans on the floor by the door, feel the evidence of his nudity pressing long and thick against your thigh.

His lips work down the length of your neck, down your chest, to suck a puckered, soapy nipple into his mouth. He's looking up at you with those murky blue eyes and your mind goes blank. You don't care why he chose now of all times to see you, to touch you, as long as he doesn't stop, as long as he keeps sucking and licking and biting you just like that. And you really must've hit your head because, fuck, you're already this close to coming and that's never happened before.

Your thighs press together, searching for any kind of friction, as you tug on Bucky's hair. When you pull, his eyes roll back. He groans, the noise shooting straight to your pussy.

Still holding you up with one hand, Bucky bullies your thighs apart with the other, spreading you open and on your tip toes so he can slide his fingers over your cunt. Two thick digits slip between your folds and shove into your cunt. You gasp, writhing around his fingers. It's too much, you feel so fucking full you can barely stand it. But Bucky keeps working his fingers, scissoring them, spreading them deep as he pumps them in and out. Your nails scrape against his skin, scrambling across his broad shoulders to find purchase as he brings you careening fast over the edge until you're plummeting, screaming his name as you spasm around his fingers.

He pulls his fingers away and you watch, dazed and panting as he sucks them clean. The way he moans around his fingers nearly has you coming again.

"Bucky, please," you don't know what you're asking for but you don't care. You'll gladly take anything he gives you.

"Need more," he groans, his eyes glazed. "Can I have more, angel?"

You're nodding wildly as he sits you down on the shower bench. Hot water rains down on his back and he's lifting your feet up on the bench so he can keep you spread wide open. His big hands clamp down on your thighs and it would be almost painful if you weren't distracted by the way his mouth latched onto your clit.

"Fuck! Bucky, oh my god," there wasn't any stopping your rambling, begging, pleading. It was too much, too good. Bucky's moans vibrated to your core. He feasted on you like you were his last meal, licking every drop of your juices, sucking each fold before fucking into you with his tongue.

You could think, talk, breathe. All you knew was Bucky's touch as he made you come again. Your legs shook and your back arched and it went on for what felt like forever, this mind blowing pleasure that you almost didn't feel worthy of. That he looked up at you as he cleaned you up with his tongue like you were everything to him in this moment made your eyes well up again for being so emotional.

A look of worry wrinkles Bucky's brow. 

"Are you okay? Did I hurt you?"

With a shaky hand you brushed back an errant hair from his forehead and caressed his cheek. "No, I'm fine. Sorry, I just get emotional like this before, y'know..." You didn't want say it, especially not to a guy you liked right after he ate you out. It was hard to look at him still sitting there between your legs, your face feeling hotter by the second.

"You mean before your period?"

You sputtered and tried to close your legs. No way, there's no way you're talking about your period with your dream man with your legs spread open like he's your gyno.

"Don't hide from me," Bucky growled. You watched, your jaw dropping, as he nuzzled his nose into your mound at the apex of your sex and breathed in deep, filling his lungs with your scent.

"How did you know?"

"Your phone, you left it open at the gym." Bucky doesn't stop kissing your mound, your belly. It's like he's a cat and you're the catnip. "And I can smell it on you. Your scent changes, gets...deeper somehow. Like you're calling to me."

Suddenly he's lifting you up and you quickly wrap your legs around his waist with a shout of surprise. Bucky grabs one of the giant hotel towels on his way out of the bathroom, carrying you like it's nothing. It is for him, but it's jarring. You always forget that he's not just some guy. Like the fact that his enhanced senses don't just include hearing and sight. Of fucking course he can scent you like a bloodhound.

Bucky lays out the big, fluffy towel and drops you on it, watching with hunger in his eyes as you jiggle when your body bounces on the mattress. You want to cover yourself with your arms and squeeze your legs shut, but you hear his voice in your head. 

"Don't hide from me."

Bucky crawls on top of you, his thick arms and broad shoulders blocking out the rest of the room. It's just him and you and this bed. And between you his cock pushes thick and needy against your weeping cunt. His hips twitch as he kisses you, lightly rubbing the thick vein running down his cock through your folds.

"Please, Bucky," you whine against his lips.

His forehead rests against yours briefly before he sits back on his heels. Bucky's heavy-lidded gaze is hungry, staring at the way your cream coats his cock.

"Please don't tease me, Bucky," your plea comes out shaky and unsure. "I can't take it."

Bucky caresses your cheek, tugs at your bottom lip with his thumb.

"If you let me in, I don't think I'll ever leave."

Your brows pinch, your heart hammers away in your throat. You get the feeling he doesn't just mean in the physical sense.

"I don't want you to leave."

Bucky's eyes shut and his jaw clenches and you reach for him. To take his face in your hands so you can pull him close and look into those beautiful blue eyes when he finally thrusts inside. And he lets you.

You hold him in your hands as his whole body shakes. You've never felt so full, so complete, but you need more. If only he'd move, you need him to move.

"Bucky-"

The growl that explodes from deep in Bucky's chest is the only warning you get before he pulls back, nearly all the way out, and slams back in. The force of it shoves the air from your lungs and you can scarcely catch your breath before he does it again and again, picking up pace until he's hammering into you, pounding you into the mattress. His groin grinds against your pelvis with every deep thrust, the thatch of hair there teasing your clit.

Bucky takes you by the throat, tenderly at first, saying, "Look at me. Don't look away, beautiful, keep those eyes open."

It's a struggle but those blue eyes ground you as your mind tries to float away. You don't know what sounds you're making, what you're even saying but Bucky shushes you, tells you he's got you, you're his.

"My pussy. Mine to fill up, right, beautiful? All mine."

You nod your head as best you can with his fingers on your jaw, babbling nonsense. He doesn't slow or stop, that super-soldier stamina helping him keep a brutal pace.

Bucky grabs your right thigh, turning it over so it's on top of your left and holding it there with the hand not on your throat. Your eyes roll back at the way the new position has him grinding against your inner walls. You thought you felt full before, but this is something else entirely.

Your hands fly up to Bucky's forearm, desperate for a part of him to hold on to as he looms over you, taking what belongs to him. His hand on the meat of your thigh tightens as he grunts and groans and you grip at the hand on your throat, silently begging for his gentle hold to tighten too.

His eyes soften, as he shifts his hand and squeezes. This man could end you right here, right now, with a twitch of his finger but he's looking at you like you're delicate, so fucking delicate and it doesn't make any sense. Your brain is fried, everything feels like too much and just right at the same time. Like you're meant to be here under him, full of him, taking everything he gives you.

"God, you're so beautiful."

Your legs shake under his grip and you feel yourself implode. His words ricochet around your head as you come, coating his cock, and the sheets, with your release.

Bucky's grip on your throat loosens and he collapses on top of you, capturing your lips with his, cradling his arms around you. His full weight on top of your twisted, bent body is a welcome pressure. You never want him to leave.

"Mine," he growls again. "Gotta fill you up, breed this sweet little cunt so everyone knows you're mine. I can't hold back anymore. Say it. Say you're mine."

"I'm yours, Bucky," you cry, "all yours. Only yours."

Bucky lifts your right leg up over his shoulder, spreading you wide open. He brings his thick fingers down on your messy cunt with a wet slap and you cry out, shaking as you come again.

"That's it, beautiful. Milk me fucking dry."

Bucky's hips stutter and go still and he shouts, spilling inside you, filling you to the brim.

Bucky lets your leg fall from his shoulder and collapses on top of you. Before he can suffocate you, not that you'd mind, he rolls the two of you onto your side and holds you tight to his chest. You can feel his release slipping out, oozing down your thigh. There's so much, you don't even want to think about the clean up. Not now, not when it's so much easier to think about how good it feels to be here, in his arms.

"You're mine," Bucky whispers into your hair, taking a heavy breath, filling his lungs with your scent. 

"All yours," you smile, your cheek pressing against his solid chest.

"I mean it. Not just here, not just tonight. I want to make you mine, angel."

Bucky sounds so serious it almost worries you. You turn your head where it rests on his bicep, trying to not get distracted by how big it is. Those blue eyes of his are soft but searching your face, like he needs you to understand, to know that he means it.

"I want that, Bucky. I want it so bad."

Your voice is quiet but you know he can hear you loud and clear, can hear the desperation in his voice mirrored back in yours.

His big hands roam your body, caressing your breast, your hips, like he wants to touch you everywhere all at once. You help him settle on a place by lifting your leg and curling it over his hip. You can see it on Bucky's face, how much he needs you. The way your combined scents make his nostrils flare, the tightening of his jaw. His fingers leave your hip and delve between the juncture of your thighs, a groan rumbling through his chest.

"Bucky," you pant as his fingers play in the mess he made, slipping in and out of your cunt.

He kisses your forehead, continuing to work you open once again.

"Need to have you again, angel." Bucky doesn't wait for you to respond before he's guiding himself in til you're full to bursting. "Gotta keep you stuffed full, baby."

You shudder at his words, his hands roaming your body.

"I'm yours, Bucky. All yours."

---

--

-

🖤

[throneofsapphics]

taking a vacation with feysand and/or nessian

poly!feysand x reader & poly!nessian x reader

summary: for poly!acotar week day 4, adventure

warnings: none, very brief suggestiveness

a/n: look ... I messed up the dates and it might be barely but I still made it. here's some drabbles/ headcannons!

poly!Nessian x Reader

Perhaps surprisingly, Cassian insisted on planning it all as well as keeping it a surprise. Normally, he’d give in to either of you with enough pestering, but this time he was an iron wall, not a single clue or hint given to either of you. 

He pinched his thumb and forefinger together before drawing them across his lips, even miming tossing a key over his shoulder. You rolled your eyes, but a fond smile crept on to your lips.  “What if I promise not to tell Nes?” He snorted, and you lifted and dropped your shoulders. It was worth a try - but they both knew you were terrible at keeping secrets from either of them.  "It was worth a shot," you mumbled, redirecting your attention to the book on your lap. A shadow covered you, two fingers tilting your chin up. He pressed a kiss against your forehead, chapped lips lingering for a few seconds. "It'll be worth the wait," he reassured, confidence flowing through every word, not a hint of bullshit. Your eyes narrowed, but you gave a nod. Seemingly content, Cassian placed a too-brief kiss to your lips before making his way out of the room.

Nesta was a tad anxious over how his planning would turn out 

“It’s not if it’ll be a disaster, it’s how much of a disaster.”  “Have a little more faith in him,” you chastised, quickly looking away as she turned her glare on you.  “We don’t get much … time free together,” Nesta sighed, and you carefully covered her hand with your own. “I want everything to go well.”  “We’ll be together,” you insisted. “That’s good enough for me.”  Her mouth curved at one corner, a grateful look shot your way, her hand turning up so your palms met, her fingers wrapping around yours and squeezing. 

Cassian was impressed with himself, and firmly believed he had every right to be. He hoped both of you would as well. Mother above, he’d sworn an oath to Tarquin for this. 

“The blindfold is a little extreme,” you grumbled, fidgeting with the cloth knot at the back of your head. Cassian gently swatted your hand down.  “We’re almost there.”  Nesta was quiet next to you, her hand steady in yours, but you could nearly taste the anxious energy rolling from her. You gave her what you hoped was a comforting squeeze.  Salt, and sea, and sand hit you at once, along with a scent distinct to one place …  The knot loosened at the back of your head and you tore the cloth off, rapidly taking in your surroundings. You weren’t in Adriata, but it was unmistakably the summer court.  “Cassian,” you hissed, “you’re banned, for life.”  “I promise we’re fine,” he grinned, and produced a paper from his pocket, holding it out to you with a flourish. Nesta peered over your shoulder as you carefully unraveled it. A letter - attesting Cassian and company were allowed to access this beach and a rental vacation home for the next seven days, signed by Tarquin himself. 

poly!Feysand x Reader

Feyre and Rhys argued over where to take you - in their minds, of course. It seemed the only thing they could agree on was to keep it a surprise. You watched them, eyes glazed, but lips pursed - obviously in some kind of mental argument with each other. A crease formed between Feyre's brow, Rhys's lips pressing into a tight line. You didn't like that. Especially considering you were nearly certain it was related to you somehow, otherwise they would've spoken aloud. Clearing your throat, you tried your best to get their attention. Nothing. "Right, I'm heading out," you finally called. Still no response. The sting and small sense of hurt came naturally, and you let the door slam behind you a little louder than you usually would. Rhys's muffled voice came after the slam but you were already out the door. "I'll make it up to you later, darling," Rhys's voice slid into your mind, smooth and full of promise. "I'll look forward to it," you didn't know if it was possible for your voice to be breathy in your own head, but you certainly gave your best impression of it.

Feyre packed for you, of course.

You perched on the edge of the bed as Feyre started rummaging through the drawers. First, she picked up a sundress with thin straps and flowing fabric that would just brush the middle of your thighs - ideal for hot weather. Next came a thick woolen cloak. You tilted your head, catching her eye in the mirror. "How many places are we going?" "Oh," she carefully folded a long sleeved shirt, "just one." Your mouth parted, but she answered the next question for you. "We can't have you spoiling the surprise." A laugh bubbled from your chest. Their secrecy had only made you more determined in turn, and it turned into something of a game for you over the last week.

Rhys had scouted the location no less than six times in the week before, Feyre accompanying him for a few of the trips. He knew it was safe, but with you he had to be certain.

Your back pressed against his chest, his hand covering your eyes, you winnowed - holding your breath at the sensation that never quite felt comfortable. As soon as you hit solid ground, you attempted to peel his fingers away from your eyes, but his grip was firm. "Rhys," you hissed, and he laughed but released you. Jaw dropping, you spun in a circle. Feyre stood with her hands clasped in front of her, shifting back and forth. An island. "Where," you cleared your throat, "where are we?" "An island not far off the coast," Rhys wrapped an arm around your waist, slowly turning you. You felt Feyre smooth fingers grasp your other hand, thumb brushing over the back of your hand. Rhys was still speaking, you realized and focused back in. "You can see Velaris," his voice was laced with a touch of amusement that told you he was well aware your attention wandered. Sure enough, there was a cluster of lights, but appearing barely larger than your fingertip. Twisting your head over a shoulder, you spotted the ... cabin was an understatement. Mini-palace waiting for you. Shrugging away from Rhys's grip, switching to grasp his hand instead, you tugged them both forward, their laughter trailing behind you.

[lxvvie]

OKAY LEMME ELABORATE

‘Road, down these old dirt roads

How far does it go?.’ And

‘We've been at it all night long

At each other throats’

Reminds me of Simon when he comes back to fix his family… Tommy’s drug problems and obviously his shitty dad, it makes me visualise the fighting, the self righteousness of both Tommy and his father when they realise Simon isn’t there to play fiddle to their habits.

‘Lived a lot of life and my biggest mistake

Is leaving my town with a pretty lady

Shredded my heart like a day old paper

Ran me wild and drove me crazy’

Reminds me of when Simon realises he’s falling in love, the panic, the stress and frustration because when Simon falls it’s scary; it’s paralysing and when Ghost falls it’s carnal and borderline erratic, it’s a battle between two sides of him on who will be buried at the doorstep of your shared home and who’ll have the privilege of loving you.

‘Lived my life like it was one big Vegas’

The ‘big Vegas’ implies loneliness and isolation which Simon is used to, he’s used to the 5 minute highs and lifetimes of regret that come from hookups, drugs etc which is what Vegas is mostly associated with.

‘I pour my shame inside my cup and drink myself to sleep

If I make it through the night then it's a sweet dream

I got demons, devils calling me

Came out the gutter covered in dirt, got it all over me’

I feel like this speaks to Simon because of his past, the ptsd, the trauma from his father AND from being buried alive, from being in the 141 and from simply surviving takes a toll and sometimes it’s easier to sink into ghost than to be Simon, so much so that Ghost could be the ‘devil’ calling him in the sense that his persona tempts him to avoid and suppress things he so clearly needs to deal with and escape into somewhere where his past will never get him.

I'm sipping on whiskey, I'm feeling it now

Tell momma I'm sorry for letting her down

I feel like this is self explanatory 😭✋🏾 Simon misses his ma.

I hope this all made sense 😭

-drama nonnie

Fuck, this tugs at my heartstrings but let's talk about it, Drama Nonnie.

Simon who fuckin' loves you, shit that burns brighter than any resentment that he held for his family and the loneliness that came after their deaths.

Simon who is torn between wanting to be near you and wanting to stay the fuck away because what he feels is so consuming that he fears it'll consume you, too, even though that's what he wants. And he loses himself in the next best thing but what else does it do besides make him feel worse?

Simon who yearns for his mother and her guidance, a shining light so caught up in her husband’s and sons' misery, who made him swear once in a rare moment of defiance that he never do to his future spouse what his father did to them.

Simon who calls you once when the walls around his heart crack and crumble into tiny pieces, the loneliness prevails, and he sounds seven ways into hell and misery, and if you didn't know better, you'd think he was choked up the way he was talking. But fuck, maybe he is.

Simon who wants to hear you speak, wants to hear your voice, and he swears he could be a better man—a good man—for you.

Simon who thinks himself a coward, because no matter what he feels, he can't bring himself to tell you three simple yet painful words that sit on the tip of his tongue.

Simon who misses his mum, misses her wisdom and wonders what she thinks of her darling boy now.

[bonefall]

hi! i'm severely dyscaluliac, and i absolutely adore all of your work, but i'm struggling so hard to figure out the maths behind the prey calorie to feeding cats thing. i understand that if the calorie amount is over 350, it'll feed more than one cat, but i don't have a bloody clue how to figure out how many specifically. Do i have to divide the calorie amount by the 350? Input would be greatly appreciated, apologies for the dyscaluliac rambling, i've been at this for an hour and i have a headache.

OH HEY, I also have dyscalculia! I'm always coming up with ways to help myself visualize this sort of thing. I've got you bro.

Think of 350 like a container for a single cat. Every day you have to fill 350 calories for that individual. Since 350 is just 50 seven times, you can make a beaker with seven notches.

(It always helps me to break things down into multiples of 5 and estimate around them.)

So, when you "fill" this beaker with 350 calories, your warrior is fed! The spillover from a full beaker can feed another cat.

So, if your food item was 400 (350 + 50) calories, that feeds one cat and fills up a single notch on the next "beaker." Whenever you have a big food item, you can subtract 350 from it until you reach a number below 350. When you divide a number by 350, that's what it's doing.

So if you had 3,500 / 350, your answer is 10. You can feed ten cats. 350 goes into 3,500 ten times.

When it's not a "clean" division and you have all the jumbled numbers at the end, like 3,600 / 350 = 10.285714, just pay attention to the first number after the period. It feeds 10.2 cats. The .2 means the eleventh cat is 20% fed.

Whenever you need to figure out how much food a group will need, take the population of the group, and multiply by 350.

If you have 3 cats in the group, that equation is 3 x 350. I punched that right into a calculator, and got 1,050. You need 1,050 calories to feed three cats.

Though, also remember how this functionally plays out.

If your cats are eating whole prey, it's not like Dudeheart is going to eat everything except the tail to minmax caloric efficiency. He's going to eat the whole thing. These sorts of calculations apply best to a Clan that's making soup or has someone doling out rations.

But, anyway, try making drawings to help visualize it, if it doesn't make sense. I hope this helps-- these are the hints that I use when numbers aren't making sense in my head.

[dracocheesecake]

Don't Deal With The Chameleon

Summary: When Zhen still lived with the Den of Thieves, (when they were still above the streets) she asked a very simple question. Han gave her an answer, one he hoped she wouldn't forget- because he couldn't.

Warning: Potential spoilers for KFP4, though this is only canon to my rewrite, also mentions of child abuse, and implied violence.

“Why don't we try one on her?” 

Zhen was only seven years old. It had been a simple question, asked absent-mindedly, as she and some of the other thieves polished up glass pearls to make them look real; they had another con they were going to pull tomorrow, selling them for some quick change to the suckers in the market. Han had a rag in hand, polishing a large glass orb, and glanced up at her. 

“Hm? On who?” 

“The Chameleon.” 

Everyone gasped. They all stopped what they had been doing and stared at her, open-mouthed. Zhen clenched her rag tightly in her paw, muscles going tense. She never liked it when so many people stared at her. Nothing good ever happened afterwards. She glanced around, searching for an escape. 

Han provided it. He glanced around at the rest of the gang and then waved his claws dismissively. 

“Alright, everyone, clear out. I need to have a talk with Zhen, real quick. I think it's time to explain the Rules to her.” 

One of the older members- an antelope, a woman Zhen only vaguely knew- gave Han some sort of look she was too young to decipher, though she was street smart enough to guess she probably wasn't supposed to. Han chewed the inside of his cheek irritably and waved her off, too, more vigorously than the others. 

“Yeah, I can handle it. It's fine. I'm just going to explain a little something. It's educational. It'll be good for her.” 

Now Zhen wondered if this was going to hurt; none of the thieves had ever actually hurt her before, Han especially had never even made such a threat, save as a joke- but Zhen had been around angry adults before, who had defined “educational” as hitting a child after she stole an orange to feed herself. She clutched the rag she held tighter, bearing her teeth just a little as he approached. 

The pangolin just stood and looked down at her for a moment, searching. Then he sighed.

“Relax, kid. I’m not going to beat you. You asked a question, so I’m going to answer. It’s just a long story. I’ll make it shorter: once upon a time, there was a monkey named Bo, a snake named Biming, an antelope named Zimo, a leopard named Jun, and a little owl named Nuwa. Got that?” 

Zhen nodded. She did relax some, now the threat was averted. Han smiled and nodded. 

“Good. Now, here's the tricky part: they were some of the greatest thieves the Den had ever seen- the entire city had ever seen, probably, possibly the entire world- but that's boasting. Anyway: they made a great team, and they were very talented. Could steal the very pants off you before you even realized it- and in broad daylight. 

They were good. When the Den had them, things were running smoothly. Everyone had more than they could eat and plenty of money to spend- Yeah, this was waaay before you. And then, Bo- remember, that's the monkey- he got this funny idea one day, right? He says to me, ‘Hey, let's pull a heist on the witch up on that hill’.” 

Han sighed and flicked the rim of his hat so it bounced somewhat, then shook his head. 

“...I said: ‘Bo, that's stupid. Don't let that leave your mouth around anyone else or they'll laugh you out of here’. You know what happened next?” 

Zhen nodded. “He did it anyway?” 

“Yeah. And somehow, this numbskull talks the others into doing it with him. Zimo comes to me about it, and Jun was in for it just because Zimo was, and Biming- I thought she had some sense, I was wrong on that one- and then Nuwa! I couldn't believe it, but hey, if anyone could do it…”

There was some sort of shift in the atmosphere of the room, something Zhen caught onto immediately. Han's whole demeanor changed- but it wasn't immediately dangerous to her, so she had no real concern with it, yet. Still, it made her fur bristle. 

There were round windows here, in the old warehouse, and on one side they got a good breeze- and on the other, a great view of the city. Han climbed up onto the crate just under one of them and stood to look out of it. The rag dripped a little in his claws. 

“...They said it was just going to be a quick heist, simple: just to scope the place out, you know?- Nothing serious, not yet…just to make the attempt, just to see if a real job would be worth the effort. Surely, a place that big, her, with her reputation, the way she…She had to be loaded, she had to keep all that scratch somewhere, right?”

He swallowed. The rag made a wet squelching noise as he wrung it out.

“...They didn’t come back for awhile- I knew they wouldn't, heists could take any length of time, even just the run-downs, if you had to make a quick escape and lay low for a bit…But…this…I remember-” 

He chuckled. It wasn’t a funny chuckle, more of a swallowing sound, like the noise a cat would make before vomiting. 

“I thought, ‘Hey, they should be back by now- I hope they weren’t dumb enough to get caught. Wouldn’t that be some bad luck’?- And- And then…” 

The rag he was squeezing went tighter and tighter into a spiral, as he wrung it between his hands. His feet were getting wet, as was the crate. Suddenly, he went perfectly still. There was a soft inhalation of breath. When he spoke again, his voice was perfect and glassy. 

“...Bo came back. Just swaggering back in, bragging to everyone about how they did it, he was so, so, bouncy, swinging around everywhere, the way he always was after a heist- how he always had such energy afterwards, I could never wrap my- never- that's not the point. Look, he comes in…but what about everyone else? I ask him that, we're all askin’, he puts his hands up, all ‘I'll get to that in a minute’- ‘Well, did they get caught? Where are they?’- He says, ‘Relax, I'll get to it-’” 

Han made that noise again. The rag squelched again. “...I noticed something, then. I was close enough to him to see it- look, he had this scar, right? About here?” He gestured with a claw to a spot just under his jawline. Zhen nodded. 

“-Yeah. About there.” Han chortled, a genuine one this time. His eyes clouded over, somewhat nostalgic through the darker haze,, a patch of sun through the rain. 

“He used to like to play with knives when we were kids- cut himself bad. I remember, one time I flicked a coin at him, burst it back open, and it never really healed right- the point is: it was a bad scar. Real nasty.”

His eyes darkened again. He tightened his grip on the rag.

“...He didn't have it when he came back. I noticed that. No one else did. He was talking over everyone, going on about how they snuck by the guards, climbed the walls, picked a lock or two- the usual step-by-step, that's how he was, he liked to explain himself real well, make an epic saga of it…That was right.” He nodded to himself. “...That was right…but it wasn't. 

He swung around one of the columns, and then slithering around the other side of it was Biming, continuing the story right where Bo had left off…She had a nice voice. A clear voice, she was a good singer. That was right.” 

Zhen furrowed her brow, but she wasn't confused. Han saw it, and he nodded again. 

“...Then Biming went around a corner, and back around here's Zimo, continuing where Biming left off. He had a slight limp, but that didn't stop him from being a good pick-pocket. He noted, too, that they had almost got caught because of that lame hoof, but Jun managed to carry him, so they got pretty far in, alright…Jun continued where Zimo left off, and he confirmed it…Jun was a big guy, but a nice guy. He loved Zimo, you know…” 

He bit his lip. He blinked, hard, a couple times. 

“...And then when Jun went into the shadows, out came Nuwa, stepping forward…” 

His breath shuddered. Again he had to blink hard before he could continue. He imitated a hoarse, feminine voice: 

“...’We got in alright, that part was easy. We snuck past the few sleeping guards, and then we came to one of the corridors- probably around the north side. We crept along, searching for the treasure trove…’” 

Han paused. He was shaking. Then he took the longest breath he had taken thus far. When he spoke, the imitation of a feminine voice changed into something harder, colder. 

“...’And then they ran into me.’” 

His voice broke back into its own. “The Chameleon, standing right in our midst, grinning right in my face- I knew. I knew, then…I knew it, I knew it, I knew…She didn't have to string ‘em- she…she didn't have to do anything. I knew.” 

Han wrung the rag between his hands. It was bone-dry at this point. His eyes remained glued to the window, the last rays of sunlight striking the deep brown of his eyes golden- the glare must have been intense, but he seemed blind to it. There was a thick silence, and she saw his lower jaw trembling, heard the softest sound of his teeth chattering together- a nervous reflex. She didn’t know Han could be nervous, or afraid. 

“...Those were my friends, Zhen.” He said, softly. 

Zhen clambered up onto the crate with him, but even then she had to stand on her tip-toes and haul herself up with her paws to see over the edge of the windowsill, to see what he was looking at. 

The sun had set beyond it, now, and she could see the compound that loomed over the city clearly: more than that, in the blue shade the muted colors came out more distinct, and now she saw the slight discoloration on the wall facing their den. She had never seen it before, never noticed it, it had been so weatherworn, scrubbed so perfectly clean…or so it had seemed. 

Her eyes widened. A small gasp escaped her, and she turned to look up at Han. He was looking at her, and he saw she understood. He handed her the rag. 

“And that,” he said, “is why we don’t deal with the Chameleon. That’s the greatest rule of them all, and the one you can only break once. Don’t ever forget that.” 

Then he got down off the box and picked up one of the glass pearls. He held it for a moment, rolling it this way and that in his palm. 

“...Anyway, these still won't cut it. HEY! Everybody! Get your lazy tails back in here-” 

And after that, everything seemed to go back to normal. Han was joking around, making threats and promises and swearing along with everyone else as they polished their goods, though Zhen was certain she wasn’t imagining the slight dampness in the mood. Her eyes kept glancing at the window, at the sliver of wall she could see where she sat, and the story played over in her mind, along with that one rule, more precious than its weight in gold. 

She went to sleep that night still thinking of the stains on the wall, and Han’s chattering teeth. And she wondered to herself: if she messed up, if she did the wrong thing just once, didn’t manage to get away…would it be her face the Chameleon wore when she came back here, while the real Zhen was left hanging?

[dotster001]

Who is Asexual in each fandom?

Summary: In honor of ace visibility week, I'm dropping the characters I think are Ace in each fandom.

CW: you might not like who I hc as ace, but don't try to fight me on it cause I'll cry. These are just my opinions. Some will have big explanations, some small. Allusions to sex as a concept, but only to explain where characters lie on the spectrum. Asexuality, like every sexuality, is a spectrum, and there's various types of aces in my HC's. There is no wrong way to be ace!

Fandoms included: Ensemble stars, Ayakashi Romance Reborn, court of darkness, twisted wonderland, obey me, Ikemen Prince, Tears of Themis

Twisted Wonderland

Malleus Draconia

I've discussed this before….and I know this is one people try to tear to shreds, so I figured let's start with him.

It all started when I groovified Mals ceremonial robes card. At the time I thought that he had an ace ring. Below you will find the text I sent to my friend because I was so happy.

So from the start, I was pretty biased. And I know now that wasn't an ace ring, that was the thing pulling his sleeves down. But let's look at the following. 

Dragons have low libido, because they live so long, any mating cycle is incredibly slow. So even if he's not Ace, I feel like he has low desire for adult fun time.

Also! Aces like dragons. It's just kind of a thing, so it would make sense if dragons were like us.

Then there's a recent spoiler I saw. I don't have book seven because I'm on the English server,  and I know that it's just a translation, but I feel like it vindicated this hc. Meleanor laid an egg, and it can only hatch from love. Now, to me, that says the dragon lays an egg, and as long as they have a loving partner, it'll hatch as a product of the two of you. Feels pretty Ace to me….

Can you tell I was scared to say this one? 😂

Riddle

This is fully me projecting on him. But just the way he talks, and acts, it feels to me like he's just fine without extra stuff in his relationship. I feel like his is a matter of upbringing (which is still a valid form of ace!), where part of him is touch starved. But also, I feel like touch would be very overwhelming for him. His love language is more helping people, and sharing his sweets. He would like to be able to use physical expressions of love, even if it's just holding your hand, but it's overwhelming, and a little painful for him.

Obey me

Diavolo

Can't really explain this one. Someone once posted that they thought he was Ace, and I've kind of agreed with it ever since. It's just a gut feeling.

Belphie

He's the kind that might have drive sometimes, but usually he's just too tired. It's a frequent conversation he hates having with his partners; he might not be able to be there for some of your needs. He hopes people understand, but he doesn't mind thriving off his familial bonds if he "can't be enough".

Ayakashi Romance Reborn

Koga Kitamikado

To be honest, he kind of comes off as demi romantic to me. Like, he doesn't really seem interested in even romancing us until near the end. He's the kind who requires a strong emotional connection. He'd be willing to try different aspects of a relationship out with you, but he's not gonna think up anything on his own unless he feels so so strongly about you.

Ikemen Prince

Chevalier

To me, he feels like the kind of ace that would be up for stuff if his partner wanted something, but it just doesn't cross his mind. He kind of just lives his life not really thinking about adult fun time stuff, doesn't really need it.

Court of Darkness

Jasper

Look….I have been told….things….about him. But I haven't played his route, so we'll pretend those things don't exist!

I kinda see him as demi sexual. Like, he works for the man all day, and is tired and stressed. He doesn't really have the energy for emotional or sexual connection. He might be interested if you are, but he's fine no matter how you express love.

Ensemble Stars

Ibara, Shu, and Nagisa

They're together, because they are kind of in the same boat to me. None of them really understand how to human. They just don't have the drive for adult fun time stuff, nor do they get it.

Eichi

This is a second one I don't know how to explain. My guy just says so.

Hiiro

Idk, just the way he interacts with people gives me Ace vibes. Like, he's so touchy, not even thinking about it, like his touch is just a product of friendship and how he shows familial and friendly love. He doesn't seem to grasp the concept of people being more than friends (see Rinne calling Aira his girlfriend, and Hiiro not really even acknowledging it) He strikes me as almost aro ace, (which sucks cause I love him but I'm also aro ace so can't judge too much) maybe he's the kind that dating him means that sometimes you're just his really cool roommate. Sometimes he's loving boyfriend though! It just comes in phases.

Tears of Themis

I don't think any are Ace in this fandom, but that doesn't mean none of them are. It's up to interpretation.

[mylittlesecrethaven]

Yandere Malleus Headcannons

This just came into my head one day.

It might not make sense.

But I hope it does.

(Omg warning, I'm so fucking sorry. I made this so much darker than I meant to. Um... TWs I guess... Uh... general yandere stuff, nsfw stuff, mentions of scars, mentions of burning, mentions of bleeding, there's some stuff about being tied up, amputated legs, mentions of amputated arms, dick horror, and forced pregnancy. I think I covered them all. Lemme know if I missed anything)

Every day is the same, and yet always different.

You always do something with Malleus.

And you always have to keep your eyes on him.

Great Seven forbid you ever look at anyone else.

(The screams will never leave your dreams)

Yet, he always finds somewhere new.

A new garden, a new cafe, a new park.

But you're never really allowed to do anything.

You sit.

You watch.

You smile when Malleus looks at you.

(After all, this pain is better than the pain he gives)

You say you enjoyed your day.

(You regret the days you didn't. Those scars never fade)

And you go home.

You eat.

Maybe read a book as he works.

And you hope he's too tired to want anything else.

But don't worry! He always has time for his love!

He'll wait until you finish your book.

You might read slow, but that just means you're enjoying it.

And that makes him happy.

You never run out of books.

Malleus makes sure of that!

And once your done, he'll take you back to your shared room.

And he'll toss you to the bed.

He's always so careful with you.

(He's not a complete monster, after all.)

(Right?)

And he'll make love to you.

It'll be so sweet.

And then he'll keep going.

And going.

Oh, you're tired?

WELL YOU'RE LYING!

YOU JUST WANT TO LEAVE HIM!

Uh oh.

You made him mad.

Now you have new scars.

And you're still going into the morning.

Don't worry, though.

He'll give you time to clean up and get dressed.

After all, it's a new day.

That means it's time for something new.

(So, this wasn't how this was supposed to go at all..... Hmm.... I'll make some more below this then to fit what I was actually trying to make this about. Idk if this'll be in the same world as the ones above, but I don't think it really matters)

Humans are just so fragile.

He takes you on one date and you hurt yourself.

It's your fault, really.

You backed away when he tried to kiss you.

It was your fault you fell into that flame.

Really, how reckless can one be?

Of course, he made sure you knew how mad he was as well.

You had talked to that other fae.

He had to show who you belonged to.

And you backed away.

How dare you.

Not to worry though!

Now you're safe at home!

You can't hurt yourself if you're tied down, right?

Nowhere to move.

Nowhere to go.

Now Malleus can take care of you completely.

He'll feed you.

Bathe you.

Sleep with you.

Love you.

Care for you.

(Fuck you until you bleed and sob and beg for it to end)

And yet, you still try to leave.

Stupid human.

You're lucky he loves you.

(Below is split between a gn, male, and female reader. That way, you can have a personalized ending!)

GN

You don't need your legs, right?

He already broke them, but that didn't work.

So he'll just take them.

Now he gets to carry you everywhere!

Oh, you miss walking by yourself?

No worries!

He'll hang your feet above the fireplace for you to see!

That way, you can simply remember how it felt to walk!

But if you keep being defiant, he'll take your arms next.

MALE

WHY DO YOU KEEP LOOKING AT OTHER PEOPLE?!

IS HE NOT ENOUGH FOR YOU?!

You make him so mad sometimes.

But he loves you too much to do anything horrible to you.

Yet, when he sees you hard in the morning, he's mad.

You say it's a normal bodily function, but that can't be true.

You were thinking about someone else.

He knows it wasn't about him.

You're so unfaithful.

So, now you can't get hard.

You can't cum anymore.

You have to have help pissing.

Sure, he misses messing with your cute little dick.

But this way, you remain faithful to him.

FEMALE

Oh, you noticed the baby books Malleus keeps giving you?

He's glad.

You are aware he needs an heir, yes?

Won't you help him with that?

.......

no?

No?

NO?!

WHAT DO YOU MEAN NO?!

Well guess what, you don't get a choice anymore!

You're already tied down.

And even though your screams hurt him inside,

(They don't, they make him oh so hard for you),

He still wants an heir.

So he'll fuck you.

And fuck you.

And fuck you.

Until you're pregnant.

And even then, he'll keep going.

Cause now he wants as many babies as possible.

And you'll have to care for them all with him.

He's sure you'll be an excellent mother.

(These was fucking insane. I didn't mean to make them so dark. Also, I did have a reason for putting gn, then male, then female. If I ever do this again, that order will stay the same. Idk if I'll do this again, but if someone asks, then maybe I will. But I'll need an idea for it, cause coming up with ideas is hard.)

[smolsix]

-blows dust off this blog-

So

Little Nightmares III, huh???

I was trying to avoid being excited about it because no solid release date and 2024 could be a few months from now or a year from now and Idk how long I can handle being so fuckin hyped for this game YEEHAW

BUT I CAN'T, I KEEP THINKING ABT THE GAME AAHAHHGAGA

so here are my thoughts, if you wanted to know

FIRST OF ALL, i am so glad that after we saw LTNM II we thought it'd be co-op but it was just an AI, that we finally get co-op! AND ONLINE TOO, i spent the first day worried it'd be shared screen same room situation since i wasn't trying to get my hopes up but then I realised I can just.. google it.. AND IT IS!!! ONLINE!! IDK WHO I AM GONNA PLAY IT W FIRST AAAAAAAA

anyways, you can definitely tell it's a new studio working on this game, the world feels mostly the same but the character designs themselves are definitely stylistically similar, but not the same. With Six especially, the MC designs were very simplistic and realistic but used colour (or for Mono, a single design quirk being the bag) to stand out against their backgrounds and against the enemies which are largely neutral colours. But these new ones feel... "over designed"? On their own they definitely aren't, but in comparison to Mono, Six, Seven, and even NPCs like the flashlight girl, they have a lot more going on (especially the little wrench kid, Idk which one is Alone and which one is Low yet btw OOP)

Despite it being a new studio and you can tell, new puzzles and environments, they're still doing their best to have the OGs vibes and whatnot to feel familiar, namely in the trailer they bring back the fuses, and the additional gameplay video there's a short scene with an environment with all the shelves you can find in LTNM 1s gnome section (the one with the cart that is affected by the Maws swaying).

But regardless, it still feels different enough my brain is still nervous about it. I also feel In A Way about Tarsier having LTNM II explode and their franchise getting the attention it deserves, only to have it stuck with Bandai and now it's going to likely explode again and they aren't involved. Idk how anyone on that team feels about it, but if it were me omg.

Also the only boss we've seen so far (i hope they add more and i def want some to be a surprise so im not gonna assume this is the only one for now) feels... out of place? it has the design qualities of a LTNM boss, but the size of it makes it more of a spectacle than a warped/corruption of an adult. All the previous bosses fit in their environment, we are the small ones and they are scaled to the world around them. This is the first time, outside monster Six who imo is a bit of an outlier anyways due to her circumstances, we're getting a boss who is this huge and doesn't even fit their own environment. I hope we get a lore reason for this in some way, because currently the boss doesn't have the same vibe as the others and it's throwing me off a bit. Don't get me wrong, it'll be terrifying, but looking at the picture as a whole they are sort of out of place for me rn. I don't hate the bitch either, I'm not gonna be like omg get rid of it or change it, but it does strike me as odd seeing it for now.

And yes the tall man is too tall for a lot of things, but he's not THAT big. He's more like yer tall guy who hits his head off doorways, which happens irl anyways LMAO

Little Nightmares primarily tries to capture the feeling of being a small child and how everything is big and scary, but a doll that huge is out of the realm of reality set up for us already. It's gone from scary corrupted animal to godzilla, if that makes sense.

OH AND THE MIRRORS ARE VERY LTNM COMICS OF THEM TEE HEE < 3

[writerofadream]

Fortune favors the Bold ⛓

TDI!Duncan x Juvie Bestfriend! Reader ⛓

Chapter Seven: Dodgeball to the death

You all had been sleeping absolutely terribly the past couple days because Harold fucking snores. So at breakfast, Duncan was trying to eat but could barely move, and you had passed out in your porridge. "Duncan, you look like death dude." Chris's overly cheerful voice rang out.

"Sick it." Ducan hissed before putting his head down on the table. Courtney explained their predicament.

"Wow, four nights without sleep. How much is she hurting dude, how much are you hurting dude? I kinda want to test how far it takes to break, you both." Chris smiled like a maniac. "Want to find out?" Duncan hissed.

Instinctively your whole group hid under the table, getting used to Duncan's anger. But one small snore coming out of your mouth quieted him.

Then Harold walked in with a drawn on mustache on his face causing the place to erupt with quiet giggles.

"That was me!" You raise your hand lazily. Heather began to taunt your team, causing you to throw a knife at her pinning her hair to the wall. "Get your attack dog under control." Heather yelled terrifed trying to get her hair unstuck.

"She don't bite." Duncan waved her off. You smiled weakly flipping her off. "Yes she do!" Heather screamed.

Chris walked in then. "Listen up campers, your next challenge starts in ten minutes, and be prepared to bring it." He announced as you tipped over onto Duncan passing out.

-----

You were playing dodgeball. Everyone had already gotten to the little ring, but Duncan was trudging behind. Once he walked inside he pointed at you looking mildly pissed off. "If you wake me up, it'll be the last thing you do, L/N." You rolled your eyes. Whenever Duncan was tired he got angry.

"This is all your fault, you know?" Courtney hissed at Harold.

Chris explained the rules making it seem harder then it needed to be. You were okay at dodgeball, it was basically like a prison riot. Chris gave you one minute to discuss strategies. Apparently Courtney could read your mind because she said-

"There is no way we are having Little Miss Crazy play. She'll kill them and get us disqualified." The girl whined and you growled. "Don't call me crazy." You hissed dangerously pissed as you stalked over and sat down by Duncan.

The games went on and your team got decimated by the Screaming Gophers. You weren't surprised. Yet, Courtney persisted with her idea of not having you play. So you watched.

You watched as Harold got his ass beat by LeShawna, Heather beat Tyler's ass, Courtney beg for a disqualification, DJ hit poor Gwen, it was a very interesting expierence.

Cody pulled a wild ass move out of his fucking ass. It looked impossible but he used the ball as a boomerang. Everyone was getting pissed on your team, yet Courtney persisted.

You played with Duncan's hair as he slept, and he subconsiously leaned into your hand, mumbling in his sleep. Whenever the other was close, the nightmares seemed to stop. It was... helpful. So when everyone was out on your team... again. Courtney gave this speech. "We need someone, tough, someone who wants to beat the other team to death." Everyone looked at Duncan and you.

"He'll kill us if we wake him up." DJ whispered his fears. "He won't kill us... I hope. He wants to win just as much as us." Courtney sighed not looking so sure. "Now wake him up, Y/N." She ordered. "Why me?" You laughed. "Your the only one who'd stand a chance against him in a fight." She explained and you shrugged. Made sense.

You pushed Duncan off the bench and he stood up growling. "You better have a good reason for pushing me off the bench, pincess." He nearly yelled in your face making you take a step back. "We're down two to zero. If we lose I'm going to make sure it's your ass that gets voted off, sunshine." You yelled back, making him retreat now. He may be your bestfriend, but your fucking Y/N L/N, you don't back down for shit.

He finally realized what was happening around you. "This is dodgeball, why don't you just play, you destroyed the boys last year at the anual game?" He sounded more confused then mad now. "That what's I'm saying, but miss goody two shoes thinks I'll lose my shit." You pointed at Courtney. "That's what I'm here for?" He pointed at himself.

"That's what I said!" You laughed.

"My only condition is that Y/N's co-captain. We both play, or no one plays." He explained to Courtney who nodded. "Here's a stratagey I picked up on our first visit to juvie."

You laughed remembering the event.

"It's called: rush the new guy." Also known as the first time Duncan got his ass beat in juvie rendering him with a broken collarbone and a double concussion. In shorts terms, you all converge on one person while playing dodgeball.

Soon enough you were dominating the game.

It had gotten to the point where it was 2 wins to 2 wins. This was the final game, to decide who won. It went from five players on both sides, to four, three, then two. It was a neck and neck game.

Then it was Harold vs Owen. "Well I can't say it was nice knowing him." You muttered. "Good night, Harold." Duncan sighed squeezing your hand.

But somehow the ginger dodged every ball thrown at him. "Where'd you learn to do that?" Geoff asked the boy. "Figure skating." He replied proudly. "Figures." Duncan shaked his head. Courtney told Harold he was going to have to catch the next ball thrown at him.

Which miraculously, he did.

Your team erupted into cheers. People hugged, but Duncan twirled you before bringing you back into his arms. "Wake me up again and I'll fight you, L/N." He whispered smiled kissing the top of your head. "I'd like to see you try, tiger." You smiled kissing his cheek causing the boy to blush.

You guys were getting closer by the second.

---

|Trending on X right now|

#THEYAREINLOVEYOURHONOR

#thetension-ican't-

#christmas!twodaysaway!

#covid19

#itdontbitememeswithduncanandy/n

--------

"Nice dodge skater nerd." Duncan 'complimented' Harold as you and DJ carried him on your shoulders cheering his name.

----

If you had asked Courtney, or the twin bestfriends, or Bridgette where you had fallen asleep they would've lied straight to your face and said in a bathoom.

If you had asked Geoff, Harold, or DJ where Duncan had fallen asleep they would've lied and said by the lake. In reality there was two people fast asleep their bodies entangled on Duncan's bed.

Duncan layed flat on his back with an arm as an extra pillow, and your head layed out on his chest, your hair falling down your back. You both were fast asleep, he had his hand sleepily playing with your hair twirling it around in his fingers and you had your hands attached to his shirt twisting it in your sleep.

Duncan wouldn't mind.

He never minded when it came to you.

[its-actually-minicika]

The Harshest Winters: Before the Storm (18+)

Get caught up on THW here!

You've seen them on the brink of madness. But what about before the Dance?

SURPRISE!!

Upon popular request, I decided that it was about time we expandeded the HW universe and did something fun with it.

I plan to turn this into a 3 part mini-series, that dives into the lives of our beloved chatacters before the Dance of the Dragons ever happened.

I already have the 1st chapter ready, and I will post it on the same day as the 5th instalment of THW - trust me, it'll all make sense then.

In any case, this one is for my girlies who are still enamoured with our sweet prince Jace (who is alive and kicking in this one, thank the Gods)!

... Although one cannot have "The Harshest Winters" without Aemond Targaryen stirring the plot.

I promise you - great things happening. I'm still in my little cage, writing and planning away like a mad-woman sent from the darkest pits of the Seven Hells ♡

Nonetheless, I hope you all enjoy this one as much as I did when writing it. See you all really soon!

- Mina :^

[divinityiswasted]

A Tentative Timeline of DOS2

Ok Divinity peeps here is a tentative timeline for the events surrounding DOS2. Please read more for notes, annotations, and takeaways:

Annotations (bc it's too much text for ALT):

1218 AD:

Lucian Ascends. Saves and adopts an infant Damien. Alexandar is not yet born.

1233:

Great War Starts.

Sometime in 1233:

Great War Ends.

Elven Forest Destroyed by Deathfog.

Lucian Declared Dead.

First Godwoken Killed by Lone Wolves.

1234:

First Lucian's Day.

First Voidwoken appears.

1235:

Alexandar takes over the Divine Order.

1236:

First Sourcerers are detained to Fort Joy.

1242:

Seven prisoners survive a shipwreck and land at Fort Joy. (Start of DOS2)

1244:

Fallen Heroes is said to take place.

Notes from Chart:

It is unclear if the war against the Black Ring in 1233 is the Great War or the Chaos War. I refer to it as the Great War but the text of the game and the lorebook uses both interchangeably

Most points (save Lucian's ascension and Fallen Heroes date) are taken from DOS2 files, DLC, Wiki, and Mortismal Gaming (all linked below). You can take the Fallen Heroes date with a grain of salt (bc who knows when/if it'll come out.) but I wanted to include it's date to further the idea that the DOS2 journey has space to take as long as you the player wants. A 2 week sprint around the Rivellon is just as valid as the 2 years.

You can use the comic as a resource for events note. But it doesn't specify years you're free to add them wherever they make the most sense to you.

Lucian is confirmed "dead" sometime in 1233 before 1234. This is bc the first celebration of Lucian's day and hope for new Divine.

The Great War is separated bc there's nothing that states how long it was.

Notes:

I have a file that contains basically every text seen in dos2 if you need it I've linked it HERE. (You can open this file on notepad, wordpad, or any richtext editor (not Microsoft Word mine crashed ;w;). You could probably edit out the content id tags to make searching easier but those help me realize we're on a new line of text so i keep them.) I basically input every year from 1218 - 1242 AD to check and see if there's any info in regards to things happening that year. I combined my sources with two timelines I had seen from both the wiki (HERE) and Mortismal Gaming (HERE).

Sidenote, shoutout to the wiki which also has a written copy of a lot of the notes in game (HERE). While I recommend people do runs to better understand the origin characters (for example did you know in an origin run Ifan cannot say whatever pisses off Paladin Hardwin to say that he won't have his comrades sacrifice be shoved in his face) and what's going on in their heads, the wiki does a fantastic job of catching some things you might not see on your run. You can't screenshot everything (my computer is calling me a hypocrite i can hear them) and the wiki is a great resource.

Takeaways and what we can do with this info:

I set out with this timeline to figure out one thing. Originally, I wanted to know what reasonable age Ifan could be at the start of DOS2. I got a range of numbers that'd make sense for how I view his character and then was able to make headcanons for every other character based on that. For me tacking down Ifan's life gives me some ideas on when Sebille was taken, how old the Red Prince may be, and when did Beast get exiled. It doesn't help as much for Lohse (who I just think is the baby of the group) and Fane (listen if i just say he's over a millennia old would you all take it?). And in order to do that I needed to know some of the basic events happening in and around DOS2.

I the goal in making this timeline going over the general happening around DOS2's start is to help anyone with fleshing out character HCs and worldbuilding. It helps me when writing to know what things exist in a universe so I add on what I like or highlight parts of history. (I also bc I wanted to give the origin characters a zodiac shhhhh.)

One of the shortcomings of this is that this timeline has a lot of room to expand bc a lot of documents are very human focused/written. For example there's info in the comics that shows there's tension between dwarves and lizards that isn't dated but you could tack one down. I wish Larian had tacked down one event per race (for example: let's say in 1231 the dwarves begin to express concern due to expansions of the ancient Empire into dwarven land) but alas it didn't happen. I also wanted to avoid adding any of my own HCs because the divinity journey is your own and I would like to provide a general resources for those that might need it. If this helps others build their own timeline and world then I did my job. I'll make a separate post maybe one day on each of the characters and the timelines I make for them but that's a problem for future me.

Please lemme know if this helps at all if there's things I can expound upon.

[jamietarttownsmyheart]

please i need colinjamie headcanons or prompts i’ve been deprived of them for too long

i am. so so sorry for how late this is. and how uncoordinated the rest of this will probably end up being, but, just, ima unleash random colinjamie thoughts on u and hope it makes sense lol and that you enjoy them, but since idk how long it'll end up ima put everything under the cut

random hcs

colinjamie have definitely watched the owl house at some point. maybe this is fresh in my head since the final episode just came out a few days ago, but i definitely see colinjamie watching the owl house together. two options:

maybe colin was chilling with his niece (i want colin to have a niece or a nephew so bad, he gives uncle vibes and also i want jamie to interact with the kid at some point too) and she was watching it and he got invested. and then jamie got invested via colin. OR. henry was visiting the stadium on spring break and mentioned the owl house to jamie, who was curious, watched and episode, and then got invested. flash forward to colinjamie fwb era and colin dropping by one day and finding jamie losing his shit over the episode hollow mind. jamie needs to lose his shit with someone and colin is the poor soul who came over for a hook up but ended up having to watch two seasons of a disney cartoon.

that being said, i also think that jamie, if he ever watched avatar the last airbender as a kid, only ever watched until mid season 2. life got more complicated and he was more concerned with playing well than "lazy" things like cartoons. he never got to zuko standing up to his dad. he'll get there someday, it's gonna be great

colinjamie have a unique sense of style that they somehow make work, it drives so many people mad

colin had a crush on lightning mcqueen when he was a kid. (11 years old? idk how old colin is, so im putting him at 28 in s3, making him 11 when cars came out) he thinks about this childhood crush and figures its pretty telling that he's got a speedy car and a cocky but talented boyfriend

jamie is dyslexic, and when he realized audiobooks existed, he was thrilled. still, his favorite way to experience books is to have colin read them out to him.

that being said, his favorite way to enjoy drake is to have colin rapping along

colin takes jamie along to theater performances, musicals, and the ballet.

jamie found the "whose the worm now" moment so hot. he can't let colin find out

random prompt

prompt #1

so this might be because i just re read the seven husbands of evelyn hugo, daisy jones and the six, and carrie soto is back, as well as binging all of the daisy jones and the six show, and have been listening to taylor swift all month, but i am craving something specific?

like, i am so here for an au with actor or pop star jamie (have y'all heard phil dunster's voice?) and richmond player colin hughes. its giving posh spice and david beckham.

just the different flavors of it all. if we have it in modern times, as in, the time ted lasso is set in the show, we can do so much. (we can also have a colin who is not actually a fan of his bf's music. it's not that he hates it, it's just not his style. jamie knows this, and writes songs about colin anyways. colin loves listening to these songs regardless of them not being his style.)

then of course there is the other option--i am so bad at timelines and math, so dont come for me when this is all wrong, but i, on my 7 husband of eh kick, was like omg?? give me hollywood star jamie tartt and football player colin hughes who are "roommates."

prompt #2

im a sucker for vampires and vampire hunters. i think it can go either way for them in terms of whose the vampire and whose the vampire hunters.

prompt #3

a canon divergence au where colinjamie were dating s1. jamie and keeley were dating prior to his loan to richmond and stayed friends after their breakup. he really did love her, but still hadn't learned to be accountable yet. keeley still comes around to the club bc she's jamie's best friend and wants to test the playing field with roy.

[imabeautifulbutterfly]

Once Upon a Time on The Razor Crest

Summary: You and Din come to an agreement

A/N: Hello lovelies,

Another Friday, another part to the OUATOTRC. I do apologize if the chapters appear short, but with the crazy schedule for work, looking after my mom, I'd rather give short chapters than no chapters at all.

However, I am almost done the next section of Gym Membership, once it's completed I will be able to upload it, for you all. It'll be focusing on Crosshair.

I hope you all have a lovely weekend.

Love oo.

Due to the past history of the OC there will be discussions alluding to past domestic abuse, please note that as it could be a trigger for some.

Warning: mentions of past trauma, discussions of children, truth test, I think that's it. If I miss any please let me know.

AO3 Link |   Words: 1,016 |   Previous -> Next

Main Master List   |  Once Upon a Time on the Razor Crest

THE RAZOR CREST SEVEN

CHAPTER FIVE

There was no going back now that Din opened his mouth, “Why don’t we try it out for three months. Three months with no commitment or expectations. At the end, if either of us feel uncomfortable or we realize it’s not working, we move on. No harm done.”

“Really?” I couldn’t help the smile that broke out across my face.

“Yeah” he chuckled, matching my smile. “However there is still one hurdle you have to cross, and if you fail that, there’s nothing I can do. Fair?”

“Understood. What’s the final hurdle?”

“Oh well that’s for me to know and for you to find out. In the meantime, I’ll let you know our daily routine. We start every day at 5:30 a.m., no exceptions. My son has to be up that early for me to get him ready, fed, and off to school.”

“Even on the weekends?”

“Even on the weekends.”

“How old is your son?”

“Six”

“Grade One, right?”

“Yeah, you have kids?” Din tilted his head at the woman who surprised him.

“No”

“You good with kids?”

“Haven’t really been around them much” the experience I did have couldn’t even really amount to experience. My hand itched to rub my womb, the past making another appearance in my mind. Stop it. Focus.

Din simply nodded, it was a fair and honest answer, again she surprised him, “Lunch is usually around noon or one or sometimes not at all, depending on what I’m doing and where I am. Grogu usually gets home by four, we tend to eat dinner by six, and he’s promptly in bed by eight or nine, on the weekends I’ll let him stay up till about ten.”

“Understood”

“It’s a bit strict the timing, but I find it works best for him. He’s a bit of a hyper kid, always trying to get into trouble.”

Huh, that was different from what Cobb said, but then it wasn’t my place to say anything, “I get it, I was like that as a kid”

“Tell me something about yourself, if you’re going to be staying here, I would like to at least known something about the woman who will be looking after my son”

Made sense, as much as I didn’t want to reveal too much about my past and about myself in general, Din strangely made me feel safe. It was such an odd feeling, but a welcome one. 

“Umm… not much to tell, I’m 30. Single, obviously. Grew up on Saleucami, and just started moving around, basically that’s it.” To a degree what I said was true, certainly not gonna tell him what my name really was, that was more for his and his son’s safety.

“Where in Saleucami? My brother use to be stationed there”

“Oh nice, I lived closer to the mountainous regions of Saleucami”

“I think that’s where my brother was, he always mentioned a burger joint that was out there, that only the locals know”

“Eopie Burger” I responded, nodding my head.

“Yeah, pretty decent burgers he said”

“That is if you’ve never been to BurgerNuna. Awesome burgers, but then you also have Hamburger Nexu, those guys know how to layer. Anything else you want to test me on?” I smirked, I had a lot of fond memories of Saleucami; at least that was before I ended up on Coruscant and the nightmare my life turned into shortly after. 

“You catch on quick, gotta respect you for that” Din couldn’t help smirk at her, he didn’t think a city brat would’ve caught on to his test, but she saw right through his question. He had to hand it to her, she was starting to grow on him. 

I could understand why Din was being cautious, “Hey I get it, you have a six-year-old, I’m a stranger who walked in off the street with no credentials, no background, and you’re supposed to take my word for it. I would be cautious too.”

“Thanks.” Din took a moment to decide if he was going to go through with this, he didn’t get any sort of evil intentions coming from her, and Vanth would never allow anyone who could be a danger to eitherof them to come to his home, “Alright I guess I should show you to the room we prepared for whoever was going to take the job. It’s down here on the main floor. Family rooms are upstairs. I hope you don’t mind.”

“Not at all, totally get it.” 

Din stood motioning for her to follow him. He didn’t believe a single thing she told him, but she was genuine about being from Saleucami, or at the very least was genuine about living there. He’d have to talk to Vanth later about who this woman truly was; he had a feeling she was one of Cobb’s special people, he pushed it to the back of his mind. 

The entrance to her room was just off the main hallway that connected to the foyer, “It’s just back here, the room isn’t overly furnished or anything, just basics,” Din opened the door turning on the light, “My brother stays here from time to time, so if you do find something … unsavoury, I apologize. I did clean it from top to bottom, but you know sometimes things get missed.”

I looked around the room, it was cozy, like he said it wasn’t overly furnished, but cozy. The fireplace was covered in white brick on the south wall, the window on the west side of the room was wide enough that you could sit and read on it if you wanted to, but it was in need of a cushion or something. There was a desk in the corner with a landline communicator, the bed on the opposite side of the fireplace was a nice full sized bed. The walls were a soft comforting grey colour with an accented yellow wall. 

The room was so different from all the cramped and shared spaces I’d been living in the past few years. It brought a tear to my eye.

AO3 Link |   Words: 1,016 |   Previous -> Next

Main Master List   |  Once Upon a Time on the Razor Crest

@littlemisspascal@sprout-fics@liadamerondjarin @badbatch-simp24 @spicymcnuggies @lady-ren @firstofficerwiggles @darkangel4121 @discofern @kavecika @monako-jinn-stories @ladykatakuri @avathebestx @theroguesully @furyhellfire66 @carodealmeida @ciramaris @twinkofthedink @dindjarin-mandalorian @tortor-mcgee

[buttdawg]

Papa Haitch

"Paul Levesque" has been trending on Twitter for a while, and the general vibe I see are people grappling with the realization that Triple H might be part of the problem and not the solution they always hoped for.

I think the mythology for the past 18 years or so has been that WWE sucks ass, and it's all Vince McMahon's fault, and the only way it'll get better is when he dies/retires/steps aside and Triple H takes over. Then people can say "belt" again and the camera work will improve and the booking will make sense.

I haven't watched WWE in five years, but from what I hear that's mostly how things have played out. People have been much more positive about the product since Vince retired in 2022, and that positivity improved when the TKO merger happened and Vince was moved to a safe distance from creative. I think it's safe to conclude that Paul is more competent at running a wrestling promotion than Vince.

The catch is that it's a very low bar to clear. This week has demonstrated to everyone that the bar was even lower than we knew. A few months ago I listened to a Behind the Bastards podcast series on Vince McMahon, and after seven hours they barely made it to Owen Hart's death in 1999.

Meanwhile, I fear that fans have set their expectations of Paul Levesque very high. It reminds me a lot of the hype surrounding AEW when it formed. The promise of a major wrestling promotion free of Vince McMahon leads people to expect everything they ever wanted. Our favorite wrestlers will always win and always get main event pushes, every storyline will be flawless and brilliant, we'll finally get rid of the flippy shit, we'll finally get more of the flippy shit, women wrestlers will get their due, and finally, finally, there will be sound, ethical leadership backstage.

The reality is that fans are now arguing over which company's press conferences are a bigger joke. Well, HHH may have fumbled the question about reading the lawsuit filing, but at least he didn't wear a silly hat like TK did as he deflected the questions about Chris Jericho!

The bar is pretty low. Maybe Levesque can figure out a way to recover and learn from this whole experience, and become the benevolent ruler everyone wanted him to be. Maybe his hands are dirtier than anyone guessed, and he'll be turfed out of the company by next year. Maybe he's only slightly less corrupt than Vince, and he'll manage to survive the post-Vince purges anyway. It all remains to be seen.

But it feels like the fanbase is starting to notice that this guy isn't necessarily going to deliver on all their hopes and dreams of a better WWE. It'll be better than it was under Vince, if only because they'll quit booking so many DQ finishes and no-contests. But they keep letting Hulk Hogan in the building, so that tells me they're not aiming nearly as high as I would like.

I see three kinds of comments on Triple H lately.

"Fuck that guy, he's just as bad as Vince and his cronies, and he should be fired too."

"I used to like HHH, but now I've lost all respect for him after that presser."

"Don't be so mean to HHH, you jerks, he's doing the best he can and you shouldn't expect him to talk about a lawsuit after revolutionizing Sports Entertainment™ with another great Premium Live Event™."

It's that third one that intrigues me, because I never used to see fanboys white knighting for Triple H before. It used to be they would talk about what a genius he is for conquering wrestling, and if anything good or bad happened to WWE, that was Triple H winning his game of 5-D chess. If something bad happened, it was a sign of Vince's downfall, and HHH would look like a hero when he finally got the opportunity to right the ship. If something good happened, then it made WWE even richer and more powerful for the day when HHH took control.

Now the message is: "Hey, leave him alone you guys, he's just a wee li'l booker, he can't comment on an ongoing legal matter. He's just a kindly old man cobbling Royal Rumble matches in his little workshop. Don't ask him about corporate culture and sexual abuse in the workplace. His heart's bad, so he can't take it!"

It's not a good look. It was probably more fun when he was putting on shows and hyping them up with Shawn Michael and Road Dogg like "Fuck yeah! DX is running WWE now and everything is badass!" But now he's got everyone looking at him with anger or suspicion, or pity. Maybe that all blows over in a few months, or maybe it won't. I think I might need a new userpic in the meantime...

[readingrobin]

I'm still trying to get the hang of the whole "posting content" thing, but I think providing a reading wrap-up every month will allow me a little more to work with. January was a fairly standard reading month. I was able to get through ten books, though I added quite a few to my TBR. Kind of had a mini heart attack when I realized that, according to my Storygraph, I have about 1,731 titles on there. Well, at least I know I'll never run short of reading material.

Total Books Read: 10

Total Pages Read: 3,689

Books Read:

The Devil Aspect by Craig Russell - (Review) (3.5/5)

Sweep: The Story of a Girl and Her Monster by Jonathan Auxier - All I have to say is that the best kind of children's fiction tends to be the ones that expertly balance the harsh cruelties of life, especially during the Victorian era, with an unshakable sense of hope and a lot of heart. Sweep is one of those books that doesn't shy away from the reality and history of children in peril, but there is a warmness in its pages that comes from feeling and seeing the love and protection of dear ones long since passed. Definitely a bit of a tearjerker, but in a good way. (4/5)

The Kingdom of Back by Marie Lu - (Review) (4/5)

Property of the Rebel Librarian by Allison Varnes - Looking at the world around us, this book couldn't be more relevant, as book bans are sweeping across schools and kids are left without a choice in what they want to read. Though it presents a somewhat simplistic scenario of censorship gone wild, it's definitely meant as an accessible way for young readers to be introduced to the process of book banning and what can be done to make your voice heard. (4/5)

Season of the Bruja Vol. 1 by Aaron Duran and Sara Soler - A really beautiful graphic novel that highlights the conflict of surviving indigenous traditions vs. religious colonialism. Stories that point out the hypocrisy and brutality of the Catholic church scratch such a good itch for me. The world is a little shaky though, not much is exactly explained and you almost need some prior knowledge of Mexican mythology going in, but it's worth checking out. (3/5)

A Winter's Promise by Christelle Dabos - (Review) (4/5)

Such Sharp Teeth by Rachel Harrison - (Review) (4/5)

The Ivory Key by Akshaya Raman - Though it takes a while to get going, The Ivory Key does have a great readability to it as the action finally kicks in about maybe halfway through. Up until then, the book spends a great deal laying the foundation of this world: tensions between cities, the role and history of magic in this society, the dynamics of the main characters. I will say, being introduced to at least seven different important characters in the span of 30 pages is a tad overwhelming at first, but it levels out the more you keep reading. While I did enjoy it, there was nothing particularly exemplary about the story that wowed me. The Indian-inspired setting and mythology makes it stand out, but everything else used the same tropes, beats, and twists that I've seen time and time over with little to add to them. I liked it enough to want to read the second book coming out later this year, but probably not enough to keep it on my personal shelf. (3/5)

Black Panther: The Young Prince by Ronald L. Smith - Read this one in a day and was fairly satisfied with it. It'll definitely appeal to middle grade readers looking for Marvel tie-in stories, as it has a quick pace and a good amount of action and mystery. For me, I don't think I enjoyed it enough to continue with the sequel, but it was nice to see a younger T'Challa and M'Baku out of their element away from Wakanda and how dynamic changed over the course of the book. (3/5)

Scavenge the Stars by Tara Sim - For a book inspired by The Count of Monte Cristo, the story itself was incredibly simple and told fairly straight-forwardly, but I think that works in its favor. I'm at the point where I'm starting to tire of long-winded society dramas so I appreciated it for having a bit of focus. Everyone's motivation is clear, with a natural twist or two popping up along the way, plus a great amount of casual queerness. Though the world-building wasn't exactly intricate, there is a good sense of aesthetic and personality in the setting of Moray from its high status venues to the seedy gambling dens. I'm interested to see where the story goes in the sequel! (3.5/5)

Average Rating: (3.6/5)