#it's also a bit of a trick question because his dad has been one of those figures rotating in my brain since I was a child

[im-captain-basch]

One other thing I'll have to start getting used to/comfortable talking about here was something I touched on last night, being Cranky and DK's lineage. Sometimes my brain wanders off and is like "what if this person [long brainstorming post]?" and before I know it they too are rotating in my brain like a rotisserie chicken.

While of course it usually happens with Cranky and Wrinkly or even Junior and my pink DKJr character, sometimes it's an unseen but mentioned character (like Great Aunt Grouchy in the show) or a character who theoretically had to exist for the characters to be here. The latter is what usually happens in these cases, and it mostly just pertains to me wondering about Cranky's dad.

[m1ssunderstanding]

Understanding Lennon McCartney Rewatch Part 2.1

Cynthia and John are worse and crazier for admitting what they admitted in the bio. But Jane and Paul are not exempt.

Will forever love this pic of Paul and Julian. He does not look like the fun uncle. He looks tired and dependable. Just stepped out of the womb as a father, didn't he? The sperm that fertilized his egg probably passed some fatherly advice and hair tussles to the other sperm as it passed them. 

They should've bought the fucking island.

They never look more like a couple than when the women they're actually dating are right next to them. 

The India footage actually looks so beautiful. Obviously it's a beautiful place, but they all genuinely look so free and at peace there. It really could've been so good for them. Getting enlightened, getting soberish, growing closer as a band, taking a much-needed rest. It should've been good. 

The music choices in this documentary! The drastic shift from, “all you need is love” and “the dream I had was true” and “I don't need much to set me free.” to Paul leaving to “yes I'm lonely. Wanna die.” “I'm going insane.” “Look at me. Who am I supposed to be?” 8d8 psychic damage. And the thing is it's real. John really did flip a switch, just like that.

Smashing my head into a wall. It's the same as Yoko's quote about how ‘nobody hurt John more than Paul.’ Really Pete? Worse than after his mum died? Really Yoko? More than that drunk cop? Paul, what the fuck did you do to him in India, seriously, because at this point in the doc I can't accept the theory that it was just some lack of communication, I just can't. 

It's also telling to me that when John's losing it, everyone's solution is some time alone with Paul. Nobody panic. Paul can fix him. Little do they know Paul's the one that broke him. Or maybe they do know and that's only another reason they know Paul's the only man for the job?

Old-fashioned ad voice: You liked Protective Jesus Scandal Paul? You'll love Protective LSD Scandal John! Really. Before the question is even out, he's making fun of it. I think he cuts off the interviewer at least three times with jokes before he can get the sentence out, and by the time he is, Paul's giggling too hard to feel bad about his little PR fuck-up.

Then he lets Paul talk a bit before jumping back in, this time with his Hard Man suit on. It's just so good. A testament to their unconditional love, really. Because, clearly, Paul's just hurt John pretty bad. And yet, here John is. Using every trick he's got to defend his friend. 

But actually, though John is supposedly the one everyone's worried about, Paul's doing a pretty shit job of being the “stable” one. This entire press tour he's either fucking blazed and laughing at everything or disassociated and not contributing.

(((except during that political discussion – again! Paul secretly has actual thoughts on actual things?!)))

But for the most part, John's absolutely holding down the fort. I wonder if this is another case of everyone – all their friends and business associates, just like we as a fandom still do now – assuming John is the problem child, and Paul's the strong one, but actually they're both both. 

Back to the political interview. They're just so in sync. Finishing each other's sentences when you're talking about the weather or your shared work is one thing. Finishing each other's sentences on complex topics like why poor whites often vote bigots in or the cause of rampant misinformation is quite another. 

“Letting his dad cut his hair at sixteen, seventeen.” You all know that John hates Jim quote. 

John: so there's war, and vegetables. There's relativity and absolute.  Paul (absolutely smitten): that's great Johnny. Int: that's rather hard for people to interpret. John: well if they can't interpret it now, maybe they will later..... 1. John really was extremely intelligent. 2. That last statement sums up Beatles historiography.

Paul really just Won't be alone with John, will he? Well, two can play at that game, Paul, and John's going to win, let me tell you. 

But he's going to do one last panic grab for attention first.

I really do think if John had done something like that *before* Paul would've given him that attention. Told him he's being insane and taken him home to splash some cold water on him or something and then given him whatever softness Paul was capable of. But not anymore. 

I wonder if Paul could go back to 1966 if he just wouldn't have taken John to that Indica show where he met Yoko. If he would've just said “okay John, sure, let's just stay home and trip on the couch tonight.” I don't know.

Anyway, Yoko gets an A+ for persistence. Imagine being Paul, George, or Ringo, though, and John is suddenly madly in love with this woman whose been begging you all (and then him specifically) for a platform for over a year? It would be weird to say the least. 

John: don't you hate me? I'm crazy, you know. Paul: no I don't hate you. John: aren't you pissed at me now, Paul? Even a little bit? Paul: I'm very proud of you. It's the unstoppable force (“Don't ‘nore me, Mimi!”) vs the immovable object (“I learned to put a shell around me”.) Someone get them some professional help before they nuke the whole world. 

“There is, however, a desire to get power in order to use it for good.” One of those quotes that just really lets you see a person, you know? Benevolent dictator Paul. 

Yoko, why are you talking about how bad your boy doesn't want to fuck you right in front of all his closest friends and on record for posterity? If you have to be talking about your sex life, shouldn't you be lying about how insanely horny he is for you? Oh, right, she will think of that, just not yet. 

And then she waxes poetic about how turned on John is when he's working on music with Paul. Cool. Smart. Thanks for that, though, genuinely.

And Then (gosh, Yoko is such an asset to Beatles history when she's not actively spreading misinformation. Everyone give her a hand) she goes on about how Paul goes out of his way to make her feel respected and even valued. Compare that to John and Linda, anyone? And I want to be clear, I'm not saying this means John cares too much and Paul doesn't care at all, which might be the surface read. I just think John's reaction was to scream in everyone's face that he was in pain and Paul's was to insist ad nauseam that he was fine. You know?

[tooruswhre]

JUJUTSU SORCERERS BEING PARENTS.

– feat. g.satoru, k.nanami, t.fushiguro.

– footnote. new fandom alert! been having jjk in my masterlist since the beginning of time and finally decided to get a kickstart.

obviously this is arguable, just opinion based and can be interchanged with any characters to your fancy!

– content warning. suggestive (?). implied fem reader.

i can only imagine that SATORU is a girl dad. he knew from day one that he is more than ready to spend the rest of his life with you and create a family sometime down the line. and upon hearing it was a girl, the sorcerer was beyond prepared. he spoils that girl all night and day, and it can only be assumed that she is a daddy’s girl from this behaviour. given that he is a sorcerer, and that alone comes with it’s own difficulties; he made a promise to come back to you and his babygirl in one piece every night. he would give her the world and any star in the sky if she wanted.

++ he is such a good listener when it comes to his kids; which makes me believe that his daughter is always willing to share her gossip and boy problems [ to his disliking lmaoo. may i mention he’s overprotective? ] with him because he gives the best advice.

NANAMI would be such a sheltering-helicopter parent, I can just feel it. protecting his children from the dangers of the world and making sure they’ll be able to protect themselves if he isn't somewhere arms reach away. and when he is arm's reach [ 89.9% of the time he is], he’s really probably sitting a few tables or standing a few people away from the kids, unbeknownst to them that he’s watching over them like a stalker. nanami just wants the best for his kids, just doesn’t truly know the way of going about it, so, they wouldn’t understand in their youth.

++ given that he is quite strict, he’s the type of dad that his kids would be scared to ask him for things. though, he loves them unconditionally; just a bit rough around the edges. you’re always the middleman for things, the kids ask you to ask him for them in every situation [when they want something, wanna go somewhere etc] . nanami is pretty blind-sided to that charade; wouldn’t question it if he wasn’t anyway.

to be honest, TOJI wasnt really looking forward to having kids, simply because of his lifestyle. but the conversation of having kids was in your interest; and knowing him, he’ll do anything to make you happy. nevertheless, your child was welcomed into the world a while later. and now he loves that he has a mini-me running around, showing them all the cool tricks and abilities daddy can do. he can’t tell what he loves more, the process of making love to you; or what that outcome brings. nonetheless, he suggests that the two of you should have more kids.

++ i also want to add that this man is soo laidback, if you haven’t figured that out by now. toji is the type of dad to provide his kids with logical instruction and respect!

[tangledinink]

Chapter Twelve of I'm Sorry, Teenage Mutant What Now? is up!!! It's the moment you've all waited for-- the reveal. :000 They boys discover some things about themselves (things they once knew) and visit an unfamiliar place (a place that was once familiar.) Read it on ao3 or below the cut!

[ prev ]

The group’s shocked silence lasted for two, maybe three seconds before it quickly morphed into chaos.

“That’s him! That’s the goat!” Mikey shrieked, pointing wildly. “That’s the goat who has Dad!”

“Leo! Call 911!” Raph commanded. Leo scoffed loudly.

“No way! I wanna kick this guy’s ass. Make Donnie do it.”

“What?! No fair! I’ve called 911 the last six times! It’s someone else’s turn!”

“You have not! I called 911 last time!” April protested.

“That one doesn’t count!”

“Well someone’s gotta--”

“Enough!” Goatman snarled, absolutely bristling, waving his arm sharply. The air around them suddenly felt colder and stiller, and Leo shuddered, gritting his teeth as his posture stiffened. “I am not here to listen to your silly arguments. I am here to bring you home, so you can finally fulfill your purpose.”

Leo gave a short snort of laughter. “Hm, yeah, tempting, but our Daddy actually taught us not to go with creepy sheep strangers, even if they offer us free candy, soooo…”

“What?! Candy? No! I’m talking about your purpose! The reason you were created-- to eliminate the human threat! Come with me, and I can unlock your full potential!”

“How many divine purposes have we got again? ‘Cause I’m starting to lose track,” Mikey complained. Leo rolled his eyes.

“Eliminate the human threat? Yeah, uh, maybe you haven't been paying attention, but in case you haven’t noticed, we’re literally humans.”

The yokai paused for a moment. His face twisted, and he hunched his shoulders back before he gave a forced laugh. “Humans?” He echoed. “Humans?! Surely you aren’t fooled by those silly trinkets! You can’t possibly, actually believe…”

“Oh my god. This guy is, like, for real crazy,” April observed, raising her brows.

“No, you are fools!” He hissed in return. “Humans?! These ridiculous forms are completely fabricated! These are not your true selves! You are experiments! You are soldiers! You’re mutated turtles-- my greatest creations! The creations of Baron Draxum!”

“Baron Draxum? Okay, well, we’ll deal with him when he gets here… Oh… Oh-ho-ho wait! You’re doing that, like, sinister talking-about-yourself-in-third person thing, aren’t you! Oh my god, that’s rich!” Leo snorted.

“Hey! Only Raph can use the third-person!”

“I’m sorry, did he say turtles?” Mikey questioned.

“Oh my fucking god…” Leo laughed, clutching his stomach. “Turtles? I’m sorry, we’re mutant turtles?”

“This guy can’t be serious,” Raph muttered.

“Uh, yeah, I’m pretty sure we would have noticed by now if we were reptiles,” Donnie scoffed, one hand on his hip. “Let alone subjects of some kind of biochemical experiments. Which I am intimately familiar with, by the way. Do you have any idea how many community gardens I’ve been banned from?”

“This can’t…” The yokai shook his head, a hand on his brow. “How could you be tricked by such simple magic? I will show you if I have to.” 

“Oh, I’d love to see that,” Donnie muttered.

“Come with me--”

“You are out of your damn mind if you think we’re goin’ anywhere with you!” Raph cut in.

“Maybe if you prove that turtle hypothesis thing you have going on, we can discuss it from there,” Donnie laughed, one brow quirked, sounding caught somewhere between exasperated and amused. Honestly, this whole thing was a little bit fucking hilarious. It was also fucking horrible and scary because their dad was missing and a magic criminal had them cornered in an alley, but like. Seriously. Mutant turtles? You can’t make this stuff up, dude.

Draxum sighed very deeply, scowling at their group.

“Very well,” he said, and he snapped his fingers.

Things became unfunny very, very quickly. 

If the air had become cold earlier, now it became startlingly hot, just for a moment, the alley rising up at least five degrees, and Leo heard this choked, startled gasp that he immediately recognized as his twin brother. At the same time, a blinding, almost familiar flash of white light overtook the alley, and Leo hissed, flinching away. 

When he looked back, he was horrified to find that where his brother had been standing just a moment ago there was instead some sort of green, scaled creature, their eyes slitted and their skin leathery and bumped, and he thought, what the hell happened to my brother? And after a moment of silence, all of them staring in dazed shock, the reptile flailed, floundered, held its own hands up to its face as if to examine them, and promptly began screaming. 

And Leo recognized his own brother's screams, so instead he was thinking: what the hell happened to my brother?!

“What did you do?!” Leo shrieked. Behind him, Mikey screamed, too, and he could hear April spluttering out an impressive string of curse words. He just barely resisted the urge to race over to Donnie’s side, to check if he was okay, (he’s not okay, he knows he’s not okay,) to try to help him, to fix it, because he couldn’t just turn his back on the enemy in front of them-- couldn’t ignore the very obvious threat.

“I simply removed the cloaking enchantment as he requested,” Draxum responded calmly. He even looked amused, almost, the very corners of his lips turning up.

“You what!? What the hell are you-- fix it!!! Turn him back!!!” Leo demanded, his voice rising with the very edges of panic, his pulse climbing ever-steadily higher the longer he listened to his siblings scream.

The other sighed deeply, tilting their head to the side. “Do you still not understand? Fine, then. I’ll show you as well.” 

Snap.

Leo wouldn’t describe the experience as painful, but it really wasn’t pleasant, either. He swore he could feel his skin being stripped away and reforming; it was like his skeleton itself was being rearranged, his entire body becoming fluid for just a split second before solidifying again in new places, new patterns, new spaces. An unfamiliar weight pulled at his shoulders, forcing his spine to bend, and his hands and feet fell in a way that now felt unnatural to him. His skin seemed to lay over his muscles differently now.

He was vaguely aware of Mikey screaming somewhere behind him a second time, echoing Donatello’s continued wails. 

“Guys?” April bit out, her voice high and frightened.

What the hell happened to him?

“What-- what did you do?” Leo repeated himself, his eyes wide, straining, because his vision was ever-so-slightly different than it had been a few seconds ago and he didn’t know how to adjust. He swore to god he was frozen in place. He wasn’t sure when he had ended up on his knees, but he was shaking so hard, he supposed he wasn’t surprised.

What the fuck happened to his body?

“Now are you convinced?” The yokai pressed. “Now, we will be going to my lab whether you want to or not. We can either do this the easy way or the hard way. I would highly recommend the easy way,” he hummed, giving a sharp sweep of his arms. Wind tugged at his back and Leo had just barely the presence of mind to glance behind him, his eyes widening in horror to see this huge expanse of black opening up behind him. 

Mikey-- (Mikey? They were small, they were wearing Mikey’s clothes, it must be Mikey--) yelped loudly, the inky cloud yanking him from his feet. April jumped, attempting to grab her baby brother, though she only succeeded in falling into him-- both of them swallowed up into the portal. Raph gave a strangled howl of protest, diving right after them, and Donnie was sucked up as well, disappearing from Leo’s sight. His heart thudded wildly in his ears. He could feel the magick yanking at him, trying to pull him in as well. 

But Leo had always been the fastest. 

Every shred of him was screaming to follow, to chase after his family, to go with his sister and brothers, but he tensed his muscles, his stance widening and holding firm as he set his sights back on the yokai towering before him. A tiny voice in his head whispered in his ears that following wouldn’t help--

No, he had to move forward. This guy was the one hurting them.

Get him.

Leo wasn’t sure if he had leapt forward or if he simply was there. Everything was moving too quickly for even him to follow, the blinding white of panic and rage eating hungrily at the edges of his vision, threatening to overtake him. Either way, he lunged, a cry of protective fury wringing itself from his chest.

 "Stay away from my brothers," he snarled, his own throat staggering painfully with the force with which he screamed out his warning, his hands flying forward to grab the yokai by his throat, slamming into him at full speed. He felt the alien velvet fuzz of Draxum’s skin beneath the tear of his fingernails (claws) even as the pair of them were flung from their feet. Gravity was stolen from them both, the portal behind them reaching out to consume them. 

Everything went black. For just a second, tumbling through nothingness, floating through the sizzling rush of magick itself, Leo couldn’t see anything. He couldn’t hear anything, all he could feel was the body of the yokai against him, struggling against his grip, attempting to throw him away. 

And then this bright, searing lavender light came singing through the world. It didn’t reflect or bounce; nothing was lit up by it. Leo still could not see himself, could not even find the outline of his own hands or fingers. But this brilliant, complex pattern of the palest, gentlest pastel purple lit up bright before him, swirling and twisting in foreign shapes, and Leo just barely recognized that the ribbon of runes they formed echoed the shape of the yokai he had just grabbed.

The body he was clinging to went limp.

The next second, the wind was knocked out of him as they made impact with stone, light coming streaming back into his universe. Leo found himself landing in a heap in their new location, the portal disappearing behind them. Oddly, however, the crash landing didn’t hurt near as much as he would have expected it to.

“Leo!” He heard Raph cry. Leo groaned, still dazed, looking around blearily. Where the hell were they? He glanced over at the yokai who he had yanked through the portal with them, only to find them in an awkward slump just a few paces away, completely limp and seemingly unconscious. 

“Are you okay? What happened?” Raph demanded, moving quickly to his side. Mikey was already all bundled up in his arms, shaking like a leaf and absolutely clinging to him for dear life like he was going to fall apart if he let go. And Leo couldn’t even blame him if he did. Mikey had always been the smallest of them, and Raph always the biggest, but Leo thought dimly that the size difference between them now was fucking bananas.

Jesus christ. Raph was fucking huge. And… spiky. Was he a goddamn dinosaur? What the fuck.

“I-- yeah-- I-- I think the goatman got knocked out--” He stammered, still reeling slightly, trying to collect himself, to gather himself, adrenaline still rushing through his veins like it was a racetrack. 

Somewhere in the background, Donnie fucking screamed, and Leo immediately forgot about everything else, his head whipping around. 

“Donnie!” He cried, on his feet in a second, rushing over to his brother’s side. He had no idea where they were, not having yet taken stock of the location. He was only dimly aware that they were someplace cold and dark, with stone and concrete above, below, and around them. Donnie had pressed himself up against one of the walls, his entire body rigid and his head bent forward, his arms fluttering wildly beside his head in such a way that Leo recognized he was fighting not to hit himself. Good job, Dee. The screaming continued, but every wail that wrenched its way out of Donnie’s mouth was short and grinding, repeating itself over and over like an alarm. It was fucking terrifying. Not for him, but for Donnie, because he could tell that they were completely, totally not in control. Just panicking.

“Hey. Hey, hey, it’s okay, I’m right here, Don. It’s alright. It’s okay, you’re safe, I’m right here, hermano,” he tried to soothe, forcing his voice down, calm, steady. He knew better than to touch Donnie, but he would reach over just long enough to tap a button on the side of his headphones that he knew would flip the device into white noise mode. Donnie jerked slightly in response, and the screaming stopped, at least, but he didn’t relax. His arms still fluttered and flapped anxiously, and he shifted just enough to begin rocking back and forth, clenching his jaw and grinding his teeth so hard that Leo was afraid he was going to hurt himself. His chest absolutely shook with the panicked, shuddering breaths he was taking, hyperventilating so hard that his entire body trembled in response.

“Come on, Donnie, it’s alright. It’s okay. We’re safe, Mikey and Raph and April are safe, we’re gonna be okay, but you’ve gotta breathe, dude. Can you try it with me? Like this? We’ve gotta calm down a little bit--” Leo pressed on because this was not his first rodeo. He wasn’t quite as adept at handling these things as their dad was, and at this point, Donnie was pretty good at avoiding meltdowns and panic attacks, armed with tools and tricks and years of therapy, but sometimes they were unavoidable and Leo had always known how to calm them down, always been able to step up and help, the same way Donnie could for him--

But Donnie wasn’t calming down. Donnie wouldn’t even look up at him. Rather, Donnie scrunched up harder, curled his lips, and fucking hissed at him.

And, okay, look, it wasn’t the first time Donnie had hissed at them. Donnie used to love to hiss at people when they were little kids, though nowadays he was more likely to express annoyance with declarations such as “groan” or “scoff” or “eye-roll.” But he didn’t hiss like this.

He sounded fucking feral. Even more than that, he sounded fucking terrified. He looked like a goddamn cornered animal, his eyes blown out and huge, the scaly skin that now made up his form stretched tight over shivering muscles and his lips drawn back over sharp, pointed teeth. And Leo looked down at his own clawed, three-fingered hand and came to a horrible realization.

He couldn’t help because Donnie couldn’t recognize him. They were panicking because they were in this crazy, fucked up body that wasn’t theirs, and Leo was in a fucked up body that wasn’t his, and looking at him was just a reminder of everything wrong. He was just scaring them more. His being here was just making things worse, and Leo’s throat tied itself in a knot, swelling up as the backs of his eyes pinched with the thought.

“April,” he called, his voice cracking slightly as he desperately turned to look for his sister. She wasn’t far off, watching from a short distance with obvious worry, and she blinked in surprise at the sound of her name.

“Help me.”

---

If Leo was being completely honest, he hadn’t even realized that Donnie wasn’t still nearby. The two of them typically stuck together like glue whenever they were at school. Leo would usually lead the way, and Donnie would trail after, with Leo doing most of the talking and socializing for both of them. And once Donnie got sick of whatever they were doing, he would simply drag Leo off to sit and read or work on some project or puzzle for a while, and Leo would oblige and keep him company. Donnie was always close by, and Leo wasn’t even aware that this wasn’t currently the case, too absorbed in his latest arts and crafts project, until he heard a telltale, high-pitched whine from across the room.

He was on his feet in seconds, abandoning the activity and his classmates to scuttle off in search of his twin brother. Luckily, he wasn’t too hard to find. Both because he was pretty loud, and also because their substitute teacher was crouched down next to him. She was nice enough, Leo thought, but not quite as cool as Miss Mitchelle was, and he wasn’t sure if Donnie liked her at all. It definitely didn’t seem like he liked her too much right now with how he was all balled up, and Leo wasted no time at all in planting himself physically between the two.

Donnie immediately gravitated towards his brother and Leo moved a bit closer in turn, giving Miss Substitute (he didn’t remember her name,) a very displeased look.

“He doesn’t like whatever you’re doing,” he declared firmly.

Miss Substitute’s expression twitched and faltered for a moment before it settled back into something patient and pleasant, though Leo still didn’t quite trust it. “Leo,” she said, “I was just trying to talk with your brother--”

“I can talk to him,” Leo assured immediately, not bothering to listen to the remainder of her sentence because he couldn’t imagine it would be all that important or interesting. He turned to face Donnie instead. “It’s okay. I can always understand him, ‘cause we have a secret twin language. We made it up. Only we can speak it,” he declared proudly, crouching down to lean in towards his brother, his arms wrapped around his knees.

Donnie was still whining a bit, curled up into a ball and shoved halfway inside of a cubby, his arms crossed protectively over his head as he rocked. And yeah, he was obviously upset, though Leo wasn’t completely sure why yet. As such, he got to work, conversing with his twin in the previously mentioned secret twin language.

… And.

Okay.

So.

They didn’t actually have a secret twin language.

But it was close enough! It wasn’t a language, per se, ‘cause it didn’t have words, just noises and chirps and trills and squeaks and babbles. But he still always got the gist of what Donnie was saying, and Donnie would get the gist of what he was saying, too, so it worked. Sooner or later, he could pretty much always get an understanding of what Donnie was meaning based on the inflection or tone of his noises, as well as calm the other down enough so that Leo could coax a couple of signs out of him, so Leo figured it was close enough to language.

Plus, the ‘language’ itself always seemed to kind of settle Donnie down when he was upset like this. Once Leo started humming and squeaking at him, Donnie gradually started to answer with his own chirps and clicks, and, little by little, Leo watched their twin’s body untense and unwind. Leo grinned, moving to sit properly by him, and Donnie moved closer, edging just a bit out of his hiding spot so he could shove himself up against Leo’s side instead, resting his head against his shoulder and settling in there, an indignant scowl still on his face.

Leo grinned, puffing out his chest a bit as he shot Miss Substitute a look. See? He told her so. He and Donnie always understood each other, no matter what, and he could always fix it when Donnie wasn’t feeling good! He was basically the best brother in the entire world. Confident that he understood the problem, he turned back to face Miss Substitute.

“He said you’re not doing the schedule right, and we’re supposed to do math right now,” he announced, crossing his arms over his chest. And he hadn’t even noticed, but Donnie was right, they did usually do math lessons during this part of the day-- not arts and crafts. “And also, he doesn’t like the paper fish we’re doing ‘cause the glue feels bad. So we gotta find something else to do,” he insisted. “‘Cause otherwise Donnie and I aren’t playing.”

Donnie nodded a tiny bit from behind him, and Leo beamed with pride. Understanding Donnie and calming him down wasn’t even that hard. He didn’t get why adults besides Dad had such a hard time with it sometimes. You really just had to listen to him. 

---

It took a while for April to calm Donnie back down, (or at least get him as calm as they possibly could be in such circumstances,) but she managed after a bit, his panicked breaths eventually dying down into something a bit more even and steady. Thank god. Mikey thought dimly to himself that he had never seen Donnie freak out so bad, but... he supposed he couldn't really blame him. 

He frowned a bit, looking down at his own, unfamiliar hands, and he curled up a bit more, his tail tucking in (oh my god, he had a tail,) as he clung to Raph's plastron (oh my god, Raph had a plastron.) And though it still held comfort, the fold of his biggest brother's arms, bundled up close and held there, this place that he had known his whole life... it suddenly felt foreign, too. Everything was hard and jagged and cold. And even worse-- it was unfamiliar. 

He kept staring at his own hands because he couldn't stop himself, and it made his stomach wobble. He wondered bleakly what his own face looked like because he had no idea. He wouldn't even recognize himself in the mirror. 

 Now that Donnie had finally settled a bit, though he was still curled up and pressed just against April's side, just barely not touching but still squeezed up small against her, Leo finally got up to his feet-- only to immediately lose his balance, falling over onto his back with a loud clunk.

"Leo!" Raph's eyes widened, his muscles immediately bunching up, ready to jump up and go grab his brother. Mikey could tell that he was just barely resisting the urge to scoop up all three of them and bundle them up in his arms and just hang onto them for a while. He had been sitting here long enough for Mikey to notice how fast his heart was beating. Mikey’s was keeping pace. Leo kind of flailed for a second before he managed to redirect the momentum to roll over onto his side, getting himself back onto his hands and knees. A wry, strangled laugh forced its way out of him.

"Alright. Well. Pro tip: center of gravity is weird now," he remarked dryly, his voice strained. "But the good news is falling doesn't even hurt anymore! So that’s great!"

It didn't get a laugh out of anyone. After a moment of hesitation, Mikey slowly wriggled his way from Raph's grip, making his way over to Leo's side. He didn't dare try to walk after watching Leo's attempt, noting that it seemed to be more difficult now without the rush of adrenaline to aid them, so he instead stayed in a crouch, sort of half-hopping-half-crawling over. Raph followed shortly after in a similar manner.

"Can I see?" He questioned softly, and when Leo didn't deny him, he leaned over slightly, moving his hoodie (which was now a very awkward fit,) out of the way enough so that he could examine the edges of his brother's new shell.

(Oh my god. His brother's shell. What kind of a sentence was that? What kind of weird, fucked up make-believe world were they suddenly in? Leo was his brother. He didn't have a shell. He had cool brown skin. He had bouncy blonde curls that Mikey had helped him bleach and dye a red streak in. He had vitiligo 'stripes' over his eyes. He had a bad habit of cycling through boyfriends and insomnia and a shockingly large vocabulary... but he didn't have a shell. He didn't have scales or stripes or claws or a tail.)

He looked anyway, running the tips of his fingers over the top of it, following the curve. He couldn't quite tell if he was feeling the texture of the shell, or just the texture of his own fingers, which were different than they had been; covered in scales, the skin thicker and rougher than it had been before. Bending his joints felt odd, and he couldn't help himself from doing it over and over, as if that might help him get used to it faster. 

 Every part of his brother’s shell was this cool, ocean blue, just edging on teal in some places, and Mikey thought to himself that, in the very least, it matched his life color perfectly. 

He swallowed hard and resisted the tears that were building up in his eyes. He didn’t want to cry right now. He didn’t even know what he was crying about. Because he was scared? Because he was overwhelmed? He wasn’t very good at not crying, but he forced it down, his hands trembling a bit with the effort of it.

 "Does it look the same as mine?" He heard himself asking, his eyes flickering over to meet Leo's (which were now not something he recognized, looking more animal than person, though they still retained the same, familiar almond shape. The color, however, he realized, was slightly different. Leo's eyes were brown. All of their eyes were brown, so dark that they were almost black, but now, instead, Leo's eyes were mismatched; one of them dark blue, like water in a cove, like the sea at night, and the other dark red, like ink with blood, like black cherries.) 

"I dunno," Leo laughed, though his voice was still shaking. "I don't know what mine looks like."

"They're... kinda the same…" Raph observed from nearby, leaning over slightly to examine them both. His voice sounded kind of hollow, like he wasn’t really there. Sort of far-off. "I mean. The parts I can see. Mikey, yours is more... orangey. And bumpier," he said. "And yours is spotty. Leo's is kinda... stripey." 

"Yours is huge," Leo observed with a chuckle, glancing over at their biggest brother, who was always the tallest and largest by a wide margin, but now absolutely dwarfed the rest of them. "And... spiky. You're all spiky. And… and fucking huge, dude. You look like you have fucking paws. And your mouth is all..." He laughed again, scrubbing anxiously at his face with his hands. "You look like a fucking snapping turtle."

Mikey paused a bit at that, glancing over at the other.

Donnie must have said or signed something that the rest of them didn’t catch, because April spoke up next, clearly addressing him. "Uhm, no, yours is... uh. It's kind of flat? And..." There was a pause. "Oh, oh my god, it's, like, squishy!" She squealed, everyone else in the room jumping in response, before she tamped down the noise, biting her lip and getting a handle on her reaction. "Sorry! Sorry, I just. I just wasn't expecting that texture, that's all! It doesn't... feel like what I thought a shell would feel like, I guess."

"Are we different kinds of... turtles?" Mikey questioned, tilting his head to the side. He wanted to laugh at himself when he said turtles. I mean, seriously, turtles? Of all the creatures in the world, turtles? Why were they turtles?

"I guess we must be," Leo sighed, resting his chin on his knee. "We obviously look different." 

Mikey frowned, and he thought that his lips might be trembling if he had proper lips anymore, but he wasn't sure if he did or if they could tremble or what that would feel like if they did. Okay, fine. Now there were a few tears. 

"Does that mean we're not brothers?" 

A beat of silence followed.

"We're not," Donnie said, and quite frankly, Mikey was surprised to hear him speaking. Small miracles? Kinda…?

"Yeah, we are. Don't be crazy," Raph immediately refuted, his brows (er... brows? Place where brows once were?) furrowing together, and Mikey was desperately relieved to see that the space in between still wrinkled into a crease the same way they always did. "Of course we're brothers."

"Evidently, we're not even the same species," Donnie hissed out bitterly, drawing himself up even closer, even smaller, into a little ball. "It's literally impossible."

"Come on, Dee--"

"We're not even human!" Donnie snapped, hunching up his shoulders. "We're not even people!"

"Hey, look, come on you guys," April tried to soothe, holding up her hands as if to calm the group. "It doesn't matter if you're turtles! It doesn't matter to me. I love you guys no matter what--"

"Oh, wow, what a comfort!" Donnie scoffed, and April bristled.

"Okay, look, I am trying to be helpful! I know that this fucking sucks but you do not need to take out your nasty attitude on me!"

Leo suddenly laughed-- loudly, painfully-- tilting his head back and letting his shoulders slump so he could stare up at the ceiling. "Oh my god. Jesus christ. We're not people," he bit out in between his barely restrained hysterics, squeezing his eyes shut. "We're freaks, dude!"

"Leo, c'mon." 

"We're not even people!!!" He repeated. "Fuck. We never even had a chance, and we didn't even know it!... Oh my god, we’re such morons!!! Hahaha-- welp! This is it! Pack it in, boys, it’s all over!"

"Leo, chill. What are you even talkin’ about?"

"Did you know I was gonna go on T?" He questioned, turning around sharply, suddenly, to face Raph. "Me and Dad were talking about it. For, like, a while now. And I was gonna start T, finally. Do you know how much I wanted to do that? Do you know how long I've been waiting to get to do that?"

Raph frowned. "Leo... This doesn't mean--"

"How the fuck is that going to work now!?" He interrupted. "How is anything gonna work now? We're fucking! REPTILES! Raph!!!"

"I KNOW THAT!" Now Raph was yelling, too, and Mikey flinched a bit, hiccuping softly as he drew himself down, retreating slightly, halfway into his shell (oh my god, he can do that now?) "You think you're the only one who was lookin' forward to stuff? I was--" He cut himself off, breathing in deep and then letting it out slow, his jaw tensed.

"Look. I know this... sucks. But it's not gonna help to just throw in the towel right now and mourn shit that we don't even know is gone yet, alright? We'll... figure it out," he said. "We don’t even know what’s goin’ on, so let’s just… let's just try to figure it out first. Okay?" 

Leo frowned. He looked down and to the side, tightening his hands into fists, but he didn't have any rebuttal. After a moment, he took a deep breath, pulling himself up to his feet for a second time. He tottered for a moment, his arms windmilling until he found his balance and this time he stayed on his feet. He looked around the room for a moment before his eyes fell on the limp form of Baron Draxum, still crumpled in a heap some odd paces away.

"What do we do with that guy?"

All of their eyes snapped over, as though they had all just remembered that he was there in the first place.

"Did you knock him out, dude?!" Raph questioned, his eyes widening slightly. 

"No! I mean. I don't think so. Not exactly," Leo said. "It's, like-- he grabbed me and some sort of mystic-magic-whatever thing happened. He lit up with a bunch of symbols and he just... went down. I dunno what happened." 

"Well," Raph said, sighing deeply before he pulled himself to his feet as well, doing a similar rock and wobble to Leo before he figured out the new balance he had to strike, correcting his own footing. His long tail swung back and forth behind him, assumedly on instinct, to help. "We dunno how long he's gonna stay down, so we oughta find a way out of here and put some distance between us and him ASAP. We already know where Dad is, anyway."

"Maybe we can figure out where we are," Donnie mumbled bleakly, pulling himself to his feet as well. He seemed to struggle much less than his brothers did, and Mikey noted that his back rounded less than theirs. April got up as well, sticking close to his side, but perhaps hovering a bit less now. 

Mikey watched as his family rose up, one by one, finding their feet again. And something in his chest unwound and loosened again. A breath he hadn't realized he had been holding came tumbling out of him.

He didn't know his own face anymore. And he didn't recognize his brothers when he looked at them.

But they were still them. Already, Mikey was completely sure of it. And the change, while still terrifying, felt just a tiny bit less devastating. 

He hadn’t lost them yet.

Bracing himself for the coming challenge, he rose up to his feet as well. The unfamiliar weight on his back was more than he had expected and attempted to drag him down, and he stumbled slightly, nearly toppling over onto his back the same way Leo had the first time-- but Raph grabbed his wrist before he could, pulling him forward and correcting him, and Mikey was relieved to find his center of gravity once more. Usually, he would complain about his big brother stepping in, preferring to do things on his own rather than being 'babied' by his older family members, but...

 Right now, it was actually okay. 

"Okay. Let's do this." 

(They took about three steps before Raph yelped and tripped over his own tail.)

---

Though they had tied up the so-called "Baron Draxum" with whatever rope and other scrap they could find in this place, (the longer they were here, the more Donnie began to suspect it was a lab of some kind,) none of them were very confident that it would be able to hold him for very long, if at all, and so they all got to work trying to figure out an exit. But to call this place 'maze-like' was a bit of an understatement.

"This is the worst landmark ever," April hissed in frustration as they turned a corner, only to once again be met with a hog-tied yokai, face-down on the concrete. "We keep going in circles!"

"Okay, look," Donnie sighed. "I know we don't want to linger here any more than we have to, but let's look around a bit and see if there's anything useful lying around to get us out of here. Clearly just walking out isn't getting us anywhere." 

There was a chorus of grunts and mumbles of agreement from the rest of his family, and the group slowly fanned out, beginning their search. It was dark here, wherever they were. The ground beneath his feet was cold, with him and his brothers having already ditched and stowed their sneakers and boots after realizing how awkward and painful it was to walk in them with their new wide, two-toed feet. 

The space was wide and almost circular, with various tunnels branching off at different levels, all leading away to who-knew-where. Several desks and tables were scattered about the space, each surface covered in everything from charts to pipettes to oddly-shaped jars filled with oddly-colored substances. Donnie just barely resisted the urge to sit down and start working, or to begin snatching and pocketing things as he found them. Instead, he took a liberal amount of photographs of everything they found on his phone.

 His impulse control could only get him so far, however, and his eyes narrowed as they fell across a small, purpley-pink gem that lay on the desk, suspended within a small glass case. This certainly looked interesting... Geology wasn't really a passion of his, but something about this just seemed... intriguing. He couldn't quite place it...

 Surely no one would miss this, right? It was small! It would be silly not to take it, quite frankly, and he slipped it into his pocket as quietly as he could when he was sure no one else was looking. 

Now, if only he could find some blueprints of the tunnels... But that would be too easy, wouldn't it?

"So," Mikey said after a minute or so of them searching, and Donnie sighed internally. Of course, they couldn't expect him to stay quiet for that long. "If Raph is a snapping turtle, and me and Leo are turtle-turtles, then what kind of a turtle is Donnie?"

Donnie rolled his eyes, scowling. "Okay, well, first of all, do we really have to discuss this?" He hissed, immediately bristling. "I’d highly prefer we not address the proverbial elephant in the room, thank you! Second of all, 'turtle-turtle' is not a species."

"Yeah, but, like, we have turtle shells!" Mikey explained. "But April said yours is squishy. So what does that make you?"

Donnie sighed deeply. Talking about this made his skin itch.

"A softshell turtle, I suppose."

"A softshell?" Leo questioned, raising a brow. "That's a thing?"

"Yes."

"How do you know that off the top of your head?" Raph questioned.

"Some of us actually paid attention during biology classes," he responded dryly. And having a near-photographic memory did, admittedly, help as well…

"Whoa!" Mikey absolutely beamed. "That's so cool! Now we just gotta figure out what kind of turtles me and Leo are!"

"Well, I'd look it up if we had any service. And also if it was even close to being an appropriate time for us to waste our efforts on something like that," Donnie said with a roll of his eyes. He knew that Mikey was just distracting himself, finding a silver lining so he didn’t break down, but Donnie didn’t want to think about it, didn’t want to think about how much of their entire lives was completely fabricated, about how--

He snorted, suddenly doubling over with laughter.

"What?" April questioned, raising a brow.

"I just-- I just realized!" Donnie laughed. "Our... our moms must be turtles! Fucking turtles!"

There was a beat of silence as this sunk in before Raph gave a similar reaction. "Damn! I guess you're right, huh?"

"Do you have any idea how much time I wasted in therapy talking about this?" Donnie squeaked out through giggles. "I spent so much time with Mossy talking about our mom and how she didn't want us or whatever the fuck and about the stuff she did to Dad and how I couldn't remember her, and she-- she was never even real! None of that ever even happened! She was just a fucking turtle, wasn't she!? We don’t even have a real mom!"

"Whoa! Mind... blown. I didn't even think about that..." Mikey gaped, his eyes wide. "This whole time I just assumed that our mom was probably the hotel lady..."

"Yeah, me too," Leo agreed.

Donnie blinked.

"You what?"

"Well, you know, that woman that Dad was datin’ right before he disappeared," Raph said. "And she runs the Grand Nexus Hotel, right? All the articles I ever read always mentioned her."

Donnie's eyes twitched. "You thought she was our mother?" He questioned.

"Well, that's who Dad was datin’ last! And for a long time, too. It'd make sense, wouldn't it?" Raph defended.

"Yeah. You didn't think that?" Leo said.

"NO! Why would I think that?!" Donnie was laughing again.

Leo huffed in offense, crossing his arms over his chest. "I'm sorry, do you know something we don't?"

"Apparently!" Donnie exclaimed. "Guys, you've seen pictures of her, right?!"

"Well, yeah?" Mikey tilted his head to the side.

"She's pale as fuck!"

"So?"

"And our Dad is Japanese!"

"And? Donnie, what's your point?"

"We're black!"

"... Ooooohhhhh," all three of his brothers said, nearly in unison, after Donnie's argument finally sunk in.

"Oh my god," Donnie laughed, covering his face with his hands, scrubbing tears from his eyes. "You're all so fucking dumb..."

"I guess our mom would have had to be black. I mean. We got the Japanese half from Dad, but... I never really thought about where the other half came from..." Raph admitted, his mouth still slightly agape like he was still rolling the thought about in his head. 

"Wait a minute," April said, her hands on her hips. "I mean, yeah, all that makes sense, but if you guys have secretly been turtles this whole time, then why are you black?"

"Dude, are all turtles black?" Mikey questioned, his eyes widening.

"I cannot discuss this any further. I'll get a migraine and furthermore cease to function, as I am, and I cannot stress this enough, just barely suppressing the gravity of this whole situation right now," Donnie sighed, gesturing to himself as he turned back to the desk in front of him. "Did anyone find anything yet?"

"Not yet," April sighed, shuffling through some papers. "What even is all this junk?"

"I'm not sure. Some sort of research, it seems like..." Donnie mused, sort of thumbing through a book as he spoke, reading key phrases and chunks of text as quickly as he could and making mental notes so he could refer back to it later. He was more than happy to have something else to focus on, though this would admittedly be a lot easier with human hands. "But I'm still not sure where--"

Shhhh shhhh.

Donnie paused mid-sentence, his brows furrowed. He hadn't noticed that sound before now. He tilted his head a bit to the side, turning in its direction, trying to zero in.

"... Donnie?"

"What's that noise?" He questioned aloud, though his voice was barely above a whisper.

Shhhh shhhhh.

He knew that noise. He recognized it. Where had he heard it before?

Shhhh shhhhh.

... Water, he realized with a start. The noise was running water. Of course. How had he never realized this before?...

That's what he was hearing. That's what he had heard.

"Dee? You good?"

"Guys," he said, turning just enough to glance over in their direction. His face suddenly felt like glass. It was odd. "I think... I think we're in the sewer," he said. "... And I think we've been here before...?"

Before anyone could say anything further, a new noise filled up the space.

Skrrrtttccchhhhh.

---

"What was that?!" Mikey shrieked, immediately leaping behind his biggest brother to hide. Leo and Donnie were instantly gravitating to each other as well, falling into stance on instinct as they stood back to back, each covering the other. 

"It sounds like something scratching," April said thoughtfully, and true to her word, the same skritching noise clawed its way through the air a moment later, echoing slightly against the walls. "I think it's coming from over here!"

"April!" Raph hissed off a protest as she took off, heading in the direction of the sound. "We don't know what that is!"

"We will if we go look!" She chirped in reply. I mean, come on, what was the benefit of hiding over here instead of investigating? Weren't they curious either way? Besides, they were stuck here regardless-- maybe they'd find something helpful.

The noise continued as April searched, peering around corners and down tunnels, until, finally, she found her prize. Tucked inside one of the off-shoot tunnels, one of the many dead-ends that seemed to surround this space, was a proverbial treasure trove. A variety of odds and ends filled the space; various amulets and scrolls and chests and even weapons were leaned up against the wall or stacked up on the ground. In fact, a lot of weapons were in here. Was this some kind of a weird armory? Or a trophy room? What kind of sewer has a trophy room?

But most interestingly, she found the source of the noise. Inside a small, dimly lit orb, looking as though it were made of some sort of glass, or perhaps even light, was one of the oddest creatures April had ever seen, clawing sadly at the surface of its prison. It had ears like a chihuahua, pointed and too big for its head, with tufts of fur poofing out from inside, but huge eyes like some kind of a cat. Pointed tusks stuck from its mouth like a boar, but soft, downy yellow-and-blue fur covered its entire, squirrel-like body, complete with a fluffy, wriggly tail.

"AW, you guyyssss!" She called out. "Come look! It's cute!"

"April!" The guys were right behind her, with Raph leading the charge. "You can't just run off like-- jumpin' jack flash! What the heck is that thing?!"

"I dunno!" April said with a shrug, immediately making her way into the room, scooping up the orb so she could examine it, looking for a way to open it up. The little critter inside pattered about excitedly, its claws clicking against the smooth surface. "Help me figure out how to get him outta here."

"Are you sure about that?" Leo questioned. "No offense, but we have nooo idea what that thing is! Maybe it's, I dunno, locked up for a reason?"

"What? C'mon, guys, we've gotta help!" Mikey protested, turning on them with big, pleading eyes. Nice, April thought, with Mikey on her side she had basically already won. Suck it, middle children. "Plus, he was locked up by Draxum. So he can't be bad!"

"Yeah! Ever heard ‘the enemy of my enemy is my friend?’" April added in.

"I'm not convinced," Donnie said, crossing his arms over his chest. "I mean, has anyone else noticed that pretty much everything else in this room is a weapon of some kind? Isn't that maybe a bit telling?"

"Aw, come on, Dee. Look at this face!" April insisted, holding up the orb to the others. The creature, to their credit, played their part, pulling an absolutely pitiful face which Mikey immediately echoed, turning to his brothers with watery eyes. 

Checkmate.

"Okay, okay, fine. Look, there's gotta be something in here that can help us bust him out..." Leo muttered, beginning to pick his way through the contents of the room with Raph, Donnie, and Mikey following suit shortly after. 

"Here, what about these?" Leo said after a moment, turning to face them with a pair of twin katanas in hand. "Think I could slice that bad boy open with these guys?"

April scoffed, clutching the orb close to her chest. "Uhm, and this guy in half, maybe!" She protested. "Can we try something a little less deadly, please?"

"Aw, come on! These are cool," Leo protested, grinning as he twirled them in his hands with a metallic shwing.

"You just like them because you always win at any swordsmanship event at tournaments," Donnie remarked dryly, grabbing a long wooden staff to hold in his hands, testing the weight of it. "... That being said, should we maybe grab some of these just in case?"

"Whaddya mean?" Raph glanced over at the other.

"Well, we haven't even made it to the Hidden City yet, and we've already been attacked once," Donnie reasoned, placing a hand on his hip and frowning. "So it wouldn't exactly be a bad idea to have some weapons on hand in case of an emergency." He spun the bo staff in his hands appraisingly a few times. "I mean, obviously this is a bit underwhelming, but I'm sure I could make some improvements once we got back home..."

"Sounds like a good plan to me! Look at all the stuff they’ve got!” Mikey cheered, immediately diving in, beginning to sort through all the various options they had in the room. He chuckled darkly, swinging a pair of nun-chucks in his hands. “These’ll do…”

“Yo, guys!” Raph called, waving to get his brothers’ attention before pointing to the very far corner of the room. “If we’re gonna take stuff, why don’t we take the glowy ones?”

There was, in fact, a weapons rack filled with floating, vaguely glowing weapons, tucked away in the shadows, which only made the glow all that much more tempting. They were simply begging to be taken.

Mikey and Leo, almost in unison, gasped, their faces absolutely lighting up as they raced over to join Raph. “Ooh, dibs on the sword!” Leo cheered, immediately snatching up the odachi and repeatedly striking poses.

“Hot soup! Check me out!” Mikey snatched up a bright orange kusari-fundo, absolutely beaming ear-to-ear. Raph was nearly drooling as he laid his claim on a pair of tonfas, beaming as he gave a few experimental swings. 

“They’re perfect! No one’ll mess with us now!”

“What about you, Donnie?” April questioned, tilting her head back to glance at the remaining brother. “Don’t you want a glowy weapon?”

“And add yet another unknown, uncontrolled variable to our current situation? I’m good,” Donnie scoffed, rolling his eyes. “I’ve trained with a regular, wooden bo staff. I’ll fight with a wooden bo staff, thank you very much. You all have fun with your likely-radioactive weaponry,” he said, waving them off. 

“Here, April, I got something for you, too,” Mikey chirped excitedly, scampering over to present his find to her. “Ta-da!!! Baseball bat!”

It wasn’t a baseball bat-- it was a club. But close enough! April gasped in delight. “It’s perfect!” She enthused, immediately snatching it up, rolling it around in her hands and tapping it against the side of her shoe a few times. Ooh, and the weight was perfect, too. “And I think it can help us get little guy out of this ball thingie, too! Leo, come hold it still for me!”

 "Aw man, why do I gotta hold it?" Leo muttered in complaint but did as he was told regardless, kneeling down to hold the orb steady, taking care in the placement of his hands to minimize the chances of broken fingers.

 "Alright," April said, backing up a bit, her tongue sticking out from between her lips with focus. "This won't hurt a bit..." 

She swung the club back, taking care to temper her strength, and brought it down on the little ball prison with a satisfying crunch. 

"Did it work?" Mikey gasped, his eyes wide as he leaned over. The orb was not shattered nor laying in pieces; but the side of it had caved in considerably, a spiderweb of cracks blossoming from it, and a second later, it simply dissolved as if it had never been there in the first place. The creature that had previously been trapped inside cracked one eye open, having squeezed itself into the very back of its cage, flinching at the oncoming impact, gave an absolute trill of excitement, darting about in celebration.

"There we go!" April said, grinning wide, her hands planted on her hips. "See, told ya I'd get you outta there! That's better, right?"

The little yellow beast threw itself into her lap, wriggling with joy and nuzzling at her with an enthusiastic wag of its tail. "Okay, okay! You're welcome!" April laughed, giggling as she allowed the creature to clamber about in her arms, allowing it time to bounce about before it finally began to settle again.

"Any chance you know how to get out of here, little guy?"

---

Raph looked up from his phone and his tea at the sound of mail plopping down on the table, glancing over to examine the letters his father had just tossed over in his direction.

"For you," Dad remarked, sorting through the remaining mail from the day.

"For me?" Raph echoed, his brows rising up. "Who the heck is sending me mail?" Curiosity took hold immediately, and he abandoned the wrestling video he had been watching previously in favor of tearing open the letters on the table.

He was surprised to find college brochures inside. His father, however, did not seem all that surprised at all, even adding a couple more to the pile.

"It seems you are in high demand," Dad teased, smiling the tiniest bit. "I have received a few emails as well from recruiters recently."

Raph paused for a moment, rolling this idea about in his brain, trying to figure out what it meant and what it tasted like before he forced a small laugh, rubbing the back of his neck nervously.

"Guess they haven't seen my grades yet," he joked weakly. Dad hummed softly, pulling up a chair so he could sit down next to his eldest son.

"Nonsense," he scoffed. "Your grades are fine, Raphael. You've simply tricked yourself into thinking they're not by comparing yourself to others," he added, giving the other a knowing look. "And besides that, this is hardly the only thing that matters. I have told you many times that grades aren't everything. My grades in high school were terrible!" He remarked with a laugh. "And your career in sports is very impressive."

"I guess," Raph said, wrinkling his nose up a bit as he leaned over the table. Easy for him to say. He had a hard time wrapping his head around the idea of colleges being interested in him when his three younger brothers were right here in the same damn house! Had they really meant to send these to Hamato Raphael?

Dad's hand moved to rub little circles into his back, and he nudged his son's teacup a bit. Raph agreeably took a sip, allowing the warm liquid to trickle down through his chest.

"I know you have not always enjoyed schoolwork, Raphael," Dad finally spoke again. "But you are not stupid. You may very well have the most common sense of any of my children!" He chuckled. "And you have many talents besides that. You are a remarkable athlete, and I know I do not have to drag you over to the trophy wall to prove this to you, but I will if I have to. You are only sixteen and you are already the captain of multiple sports teams... not just anyone could handle that! It is difficult to lead a team. But you have always handled this with grace. And teaching children! That is a talent in and of itself. That is no easy task. Trust me, I know," he said, smiling slightly. "But you are doing so well with your new job. And I am very proud of you."

 Raphael glanced over at his father, for just a moment, hesitating like he wanted to say something, but then biting it back.

"You don't have to go to college if you don't want to," Dad added. "If you decide that is not the path for you, that is fine. I won't be upset or disappointed. I did not go to college, either! But I would hate for you to not even consider it just because you don't think you're good enough for it," he pressed. "I know you've always said you intend to pursue a career in sports of some kind, but this is very much an avenue to achieve that if you'd like. Many professional athletes get their start through college sports, you know. And I can already name half a dozen universities off the top of my head who would be thrilled to have you on their team in a couple of years!"

He sighed softly.

"But you do not have to decide right now, my son. There is still plenty of time for you to consider all of your options."

Raph glanced over at his father, shifting a bit in his seat, before looking to the side.

"Uh. I dunno, Pops. I mean. I'm not good at tests and all that junk. I mean. College football could be good 'n all, but, uh..."

He hesitated a second, sort of scratching the side of his jaw, hesitating a bit. "I dunno. Maybe I could... I mean. We could look at it, at least. I was kind of wonderin’ about, uh. I dunno… Just, lately, I was thinkin' about... studyin' early childhood education, maybe?..."

[ next ]

[a-dumb-sarcastic-bisexual]

Clone wars headcanons that took me forever to edit

I feel like my last couple of headcanons have been mushy so I’ve decided to write some shit Ahsoka and Anakin do that piss each other off 

Ahsoka bites the skin around her nails all the time and most of the time she won't stop till they’re bleeding 

Anakin’s tried literally everything in the book to get her to stop 

He tried putting spices on her hands forgetting that she likes spicy food, he’s tried painting her nails (like that’ll do anything) but she keeps picking the paint off, now he just uses the force to remove them from her mouth 

That’s gotten a few growls from her but at least it makes her aware she’s doing it but it doesn’t stop her from bitting them a couple of seconds later

Honestly he’s given up and just sits in silence while she complains about the pain

Anakin paces whenever he’s even slightly nervous and she can tell how nervous he is depending on how fast he moves 

If he’s just kinda anxious he moves pretty slow but if he’s like one shirt caught on a door handle away from a panic attack he’s teleporting 

When Padme told him he was gonna be a dad he was ecstatic for about 24 hours but after that some invisible timer went off in his head he booked it to Ahsoka’s house (she lives down the street cause of course she does)

Walked into her room and woke her poor sleepy butt up with all his pacing 

Girl swears to this day he broke the damn sound barrier with how fast he was moving 

She just wordlessly sat up and patted her bed cause she knew she wasn’t gonna get any sleep until he did 

She sat by him and listened as he rattled off all his worries and only really stepped in when the darker thoughts surfaced when it was all said and done she turned to him and said “Now let me kriffing sleep” 

Should he have probably left the room yeah but he got a total of 30 minutes of “sleep” that night so it’s not surprising that he knocked the fuck out of

Padme was a little bit alarmed to wake up without Anakin but was quickly soothed when she read Ahsoka’s message “Your nerf herders with me” 

She knew the pregnancy would dredge up some unhappy feelings and she also knew Anakin can’t think clearly if he doesn’t have Ahsoka to sort through the bullshit in his head 

She just got ready for brunch with her two favorite people and smiled cause she knew Obi-Wan and Rex would join them for dinner with or without an invitation 

When Anakin and Ahsoka were living together they would kick each other out of their own bathrooms 

Why? Well Ahsoka said Anakin’s had better lighting and water pressure and Anakin would do it to spite Ahsoka because he knew it would piss her off  

Slowly but surely their stuff gets moved into each other's bathrooms and it’s a weird amalgamation of crap 

Also when they were living together Anakin would ask Ahsoka if she was hungry before cooking and she’d often say no because she didn’t want to impose but his cooking always looked and smelled good 

So half the time girl would just end up eating some of his food when she thought he wasn’t looking 

At first he was like “Snips you said you weren’t hungry” to which she would respond “Yeah I wasn’t hungry then but I am now” after that he starts making more food on instinct cause damn that girl can eat 

Anakin gets back at her pretty easily tho by taking the first bite of her food whenever they go out to eat his excuse is that he’s “making sure it’s not poisoned” he never does this to Padme cause he respects her too damn much 

And he can’t use that trick on Obi-Wan and Rex cause the former taught him the trick and the latter has a bullshit detecter built-in 

Both Anakin and Ahsoka pull that trick on the twins tho (which gets them a quick scolding from Padme) 

Speaking of the twins it’s not surprising that as they grow up they realize that their auntie isn’t human so of course like any normal child they have questions and Anakin being the little shit that he is spots an opportunity for some laughs 

So he turns to the twins all serious-like and goes “Well my loves we actually found your auntie in a dumpster we have no idea where she came from” the twins are distraught and go to the nearest adult who just so happens to be their uncle Rex 

And Rex also being a little shit backs up Anakin’s story with so much sincerity that even Anakin believed it a little bit 

The twins being the angels they are apologize to their auntie for her terrible origin story with tears in their eyes and her reaction more than made up for the swift ass-kicking the boys got  

When Anakin was taller than Ahsoka he made her life hell by making fun of her every time something was even slightly out of her reach

He would make a big deal about grabbing it for her while commenting about how the temple’s architecture wasn’t made with the “young ones” in mind 

Obi-Wan has turned multiple blind eyes when Ahsoka socked the shit out of his arm when he tells one too many jokes some days

When she finally grows taller than him she makes the biggest deal about it and no one can blame her 

While Anakin is the pilot Ahsoka is easily the navigator she often jokes that Anakin wouldn’t find his way out of bed without help 

Which is funny cause he often acts like a herding dog with her putting his hand on her back or holding her arm to guide her 

But he’s wrong 9/10 times so it’s not uncommon to see Anakin guiding her in one direction and then see him get dragged in the opposite direction a couple of minutes later  

[bloodypeachblog]

Random idea: here are the LOV as parents to your child. (this is written as female reader btw [no she/her, but pregnancy], so feel free to use your imagination!) [Also, this may be a long one, so I hope you got a few minutes]

~~~♡♡♡~~~

Dabi: Now this guy has no clue on how to be a good father due to his past, but what he does know is to not do what his dad did. When he finds out you're pregnant with his kid, he feels pissed off at first, but after thinking it over, he decides that he's okay with it. When you try to do something, he'll go and do it for you, out of frustration/annoyance and calls you a 'dumbass' for not asking him. He goes with you wherever you go as a 'bodyguard'. He relishes in the fact that he can use this as ammo against Endeavor, being a better father than his ever was. When he holds the baby for the first time after its born, he'll never show it (maybe a little grin), but this man has melted and he is smitten over his child. He's not one for baby talk or peekaboo, so he talks to his child like an adult, nix the cursing of course. When he and his child are alone, he tells it stories about his childhood and how he doesn't want them to go through what he did.

Verdict: emotionally distant, but an okay father.

~~~♡♡♡~~~

Spinner: Totally clueless, he's still practically a child himself. When you tell him you're pregnant, he wonders how the hell that happened (he doesn't know how deep his quirk affects his genetics) and worries about how the kid will be treated if it ended up looking like him and if he'll be a good father or not. Poor lil ball of anxiety. You have to calm him down by telling him you'll be there to help and that no one is a perfect parent and that's okay. After calming down, he soon grows to the idea of having a little him or you around. He will constantly ask you how you're feeling and if you need anything, just a nervous sweetheart. Your pregnant belly is his favorite pillow to rest his head on while he's playing games. When he feels a kick, he feels a bit of satisfaction knowing that he put that in there. Once the baby is born, he is surprised that it's fully human. The minute he holds the baby and sees that it has his eyes, he starts crying, but tries to be manly about it. Little one grows up not being afraid of lizards or snakes because of their daddy. Spinner has his kid in his lap or sleeping on him while playing video games, gently putting them on a pillow nearby before raging over a loss in the game.

Verdict: worried but good gamer dad

~~~♡♡♡~~~

Twice: Oh man, this guy. You tell him you're pregnant, he is over the moon, hugging and kissing you. You're a seen how he acts around Toga, so you had no worries on his abilities. He'll be present at every doctor's appointment (or at least ask you many questions about them or have toga go with you if he can't make some of them) and you two have so much fun picking out names for it. This guy will be so protective of you that it's adorable and he will be your servant, doing whatever you ask. When he sees the baby for the first time, he is immediately in love. He will be a blubbering mess when he holds them. He does all the baby talk and peekaboos and is not ashamed of it. Later on, these two are inseparable. Partners in crime. (Seriously, this man deserves to have a loving partner and family after all the shit he's been through).

Verdict: all-time Dad of the Year award recipient

~~~♡♡♡~~~

Mr. Compress: Awkward dad. He never thought about having kids, didn't even want any. Until he met you. When you tell him you're pregnant, he is overjoyed. If this man treated you like a princess before, you have been upgraded to queen/goddess status. He is your servant; man will not let you lift a finger. Deep down, he is panicking over what to do or how to be a dad. But once he has his child in his arms, the yellow man is a mellow man. In love right away. Loves to show the baby little magic tricks, which earns him giggles and smiles, the best reaction. Lil one is his #2 fan, #1 being you, but it's a close call.

Verdict: may start out awkward, but soon becomes a good dad.

~~~♡♡♡~~~

Shigaraki: okay, we all know the trauma he went through. When he finds out you're pregnant, he gets angry. The kind of anger where he has to walk away before unleashing it, but not before having an argument with you. But you know that deep down, this man is terrified. He wants to be happy, but is too scared of hurting the little one or it hating him. You console him and tell him that things will work out alright and that you'll be there with him to help. All he does after that is lay his head on your belly and start crying. He'll later on brag about you being pregnant to his colleagues. He will have other people, if not him, do anything you ask. If anyone tries to hurt you or the baby, their ass becomes ash. Is a bit weirded out when he feels the baby kick for the first time. Once that baby is born, he falls to pieces, ready to die for this child. Baby can be seen playing with one of Shiggy's severed hands at some point and Kurogiri babysitting it once in a while. That kid will grow up to be Shigaraki's little apprentice, someone wanting to be just like their daddy.

Verdict: not the best dad in the world, but he's trying. Does a much better job after his awakening. Just keep the baby away from AFO.

~~~♡♡♡~~~

[osaka-lilac]

Asking you to kindly elaborate on the strollonso football au:

hello raapija my beloved, i would love to elaborate <3

for those out of the loop, refer to my tags on this post!

warning: i am an american with a incredibly basic understanding of footy ("soccer"). there is a reason the actual talk of any gameplay is basic and limited

fernando is this new guy to Lawrence Stroll's footy team right. (because in every universe, lawrence has to own a Team.) i can imagine he's some draft pick from spain for a new striker or something like that. possibly some trade, maybe a mid-season exchange (they do that in american football but idk if they do that in footy) those who know specifics of positions in footy please let me know your thoughts on what position fernando would play

lance: couldn't give two shits about footy. he's seen maybe once in a blue moon on the sidelines tagging along, and he's known for being visibly bored or on his phone during matches. (he has the Pout Blast 3000 for this.)

the reputation he receives from fans is much like the perceived impressions he gets irl: some spoiled kid who shouldn't be there. he's more into hockey than any match his dad's team could ever play.

now when fernando shows up its like a fucking slap to the face. like. "holy fuck i didn't think they could be this hot" type beat.

for the first time, lance shows up to a team practice with his father, not just a match. but he's really not there for the team: he is enamored by fernando. his speed. he's a sly yet devilishly handsome fucker with this wicked grin when he knows he's tricked his opponent yet again, and lance is obsessed.

not only does he start going to way more matches. he also starts showing visible interest and gets invested. and he gets loud. the mumbles online about his "spoiled reputation" turn to joy. he becomes a meme of the team for a few weeks after a clip of him getting frustrated after a poorly-called card is given to fernando ends up going viral.

and maybe this entire time, fernando has been watching this young boy from afar. he totally believes he can't be with his literal manager's young son and jeopardize his spot on the team and a shot at glory. and maybe he believes that lance initially isn't interested. but maybe when he sees lance become more invested in the team, he figures he might have a chance. he just can't figure out why lance has become so invested in what was, quite frankly, a very short amount of time.

so maybe fernando's on the side for a while in a practice. lance is there, but he seems distant. not in the game. not really watching the drills by the other players with much enthusiasm. and fernando's a smart man. and he puts some pieces together in his brain. and makes a move.

he comes up to lance and asks to talk with him once practice is done. when all the other players are gone. in the locker room. of course lance agrees

flash forward a bit. n lance is like. hanging out by the exit outside of the locker room. he counts all the players. and when there's only one left. he goes inside. finds fernando sitting on one of the benches, still in his kit.

they get to talking. what lance does outside of being at games, (i can imagine him being a student but i don't have the will to kin assign him a major right now), what his favorite hockey team is (habs. of course) and of course, the loaded question:

"lancito, what's gotten you so interested in the team now?"

of course, lance doesn't really respond to this, kinda dances around the question. he gets flustered. he doesn't want to be found out. what if he sees right through him, what if he already knows, what if he tells his dad??

fernando leans in slightly, and slides his hand over lance's hip. he cups his chin softly, and slowly turns lance's head to look at fernando straight on.

"be honest, niñito."

and when has lance ever been anything but honest.

[thefangirlfever]

Updated Fanfiction Masterlist

Started: 22/9/23

Updated: 4/8/2024

Total work: 44

Most of these fanfictions are Across the Spider-Verse related and revolve around the character of Miguel O'hara. I will update this masterlist as much as possible.

SFW fanfiction:

The Nightmare: Miguel has a nightmare and reader comforts him (angst)

The Monster : Miguel is hurt after a fight and he needs some help, something he usually refuses, because he is ashamed of his features. (angst)

In this lifetime: When Miguel had jumped into an other dimension to replace his variant, he had not expected life to be so different… (angst, romance, fluff)

NSFW fanfiction: (MDNI)

Trapped in a web : Miguel and reader are two spider-people in a relationship. They both know this relationship is impossible since they don’t belong in the same universe, but that doesn’t stop them from loving each other.

Workaholic : You and Miguel are both Spider people and you might be more attracted to one another than you acknowledge it. Things take an interesting turn during one night in his office...

Trick or Treat : One of your friends throw a Halloween Party and you meet a seducing masked guest. You both end up doing the monster (s)mash.

Four walls : You and Miguel are dating while working in the same company. What could go wrong when you are both needy, frustrated and find each other alone in an elevator?

A new beginning : Miguel and you are married for more than a year and life has been kinda hectic with all your work. One day he comes home and after seeing Peter B. Parker with Mayday all day, Miguel has only one thing in his mind… Getting you pregnant.

The unknown destination : Miguel found himself lost in the multiverse. He ends up in an alternative dimension filled with strange flowers.

Good morning : Since you and Miguel had been married, he’s been rocking a dad bod, not that it bothers you…

Control freak : Miguel is a control freak but there might be one place where he lets you take control…

Let me keep you warm : What would happen if the two of you spend the night in a cabin during a snow storm?

180 Degrees : A very self-indulgent piece of smut involving Miguel...and Peter.

The first time : Reader and Miguel have their first time together. (FTM Miguel)

Merry Christmas : You usually despise coming back home for the Holidays. You either get unwanted comments or questions about your job, you appearance, your love life… But this year, things are different. Your boyfriend is here with you and he is going to make you feel good.

Miguel O'hara! firefighter: the cute firefighter you're dating hid from you that he took part to a steamy photoshoot for a firefighter's calendar.

Headcanons:

Halloween headcanons: SFW, fluff

Boyfriend Miguel helps you relax after your finals: fluff and smut

Miguel O'Hara and bimbo's girlfriend: SFW, a bit suggestive, fluff

Miguel O'hara! firefighter: the cute firefighter you're dating hid from you that he took part to a steamy photoshoot for a firefighter's calendar.

Dad bod! Miguel imagine: smut, suggestive

Series:

The Nanny serie: part 1 (fluff, domestic fluff and angst), part 2 (smut, suggestive), part 3 (fluff, suggestive), part 4 (smut)

DBF! Miguel:

part 1

part 2

part 3

part 4

part 5

part 6

headcanon 1,

headcanon 2

headcanon 3

Smut headcanon

Stress Relief: (18+, NSFW)

Part 1: Sometimes the best way to relax is a good drink, a bath, your favorite toy...and your boyfriend...

Part 2: When your boyfriend has to travel for his job, you both have to find an other way to relieve all the tension…

Part 3: a date night with Miguel turns heated when you bring out a special board-game...

Other characters:

~~I also take requests.

Into deep waters, NSFW, Jacob Holland (18+)

The bet, Very suggestive, Logan/ Wolverine (18+)

[thiccpersonality]

Damian (Gremlin) Wayne and his even more gremlin-esque family pt.4

"Alright boys I'm-" Bruce freezes in the doorway, the pressure that was in his eyes before increasing tenfold-along with his headache-at the chunks of salmon and grains of rice that have been tossed across the room. His eyes surveying how they managed this before realizing Alfred isn't even in the room anymore...so that's why.

Bruce steps forward and narrows his eyes at Jason, the nineteen year olds right hand to be exact, glaring at the fork he picked up and was about to throw at Tim. "Jason Peter Todd, drop the fork! And you, Richard John Grayson, that plate is NOT a throwing disc-" icy blue eyes turn to give the youngest two children THE LOOK™. Tim immediately drops the knife he was about to throw while Damian lowers the salmon that he would absolutely be able to murder someone with down.

"What is all this? I thought this pointless arguing was behind everyone already?"

Bruce looks at each of his children one by one, his brows pinched together as he does so, the four boys looking away shamefully at causing their dad distress. Richard truly does feel sorry, he really does, but that small competitive spirit in him whispers something about taking this chance to gain extra points by being the bigger person.

"You're right, dad. I'm sorry for being childish and fighting with my little brothers this way." Richard holds back his victorious smirk at seeing Bruce smile at him thankfully, the man's shoulders lowering into something more relaxed at the quick apology.

"I forgive you-"

Jason narrows his eyes at the eldest...that little fucker thinks he's smooth with his tricks. Well, Jason-I Can Smell Your Bullshit-Todd is not falling for these childish tricks. Jason knows that him willingly offering to clean will set Bruce's alarms off, but if he gets up to silently initiate it, that will do just fine.

Alfred sips his tea in the kitchen, the man shoving cleaning supplies towards Jason when he comes in, choosing to ignore the confused look his grandchild gives him, of course he knew one of them was eventually going to enter the kitchen for supplies. Jason opens his mouth to question the older man on how he knew but closes it just as quickly and accepts the silent help before backing out of the kitchen.

Bruce looks towards Jason eyeing the cleaning supplies curiously. "Jason...are you preparing that for Alfred?"

Jason feels kind of embarrassed when Bruce actually looks at him, but he can play it off by scoffing and bending down to pick the food up. "No, I'm cleaning it. I was the one who threw most of the food anyway." Ha! Take that Dickhead! Is what Jason is thinking when he makes eye contact with the man, extra points for him at willingly cleaning and admitting his fault with the situation at hand. Bruce's eyes widen and he tries to hold back on praising his second eldest too much...sometimes the boy gives signs that he wants Bruce's attention and then when he gives it to him his child pulls away.

Which is why he keeps it simple with a proud smile at how open Jason is being and a fond look, "Oh? Well thank you so much, Jay. That is very kind of you and mature as well-" Bruce pauses in thought for a moment before saying what he wants to say, though with a bit of hesitancy-"You...have been working on your temperament a lot. I see it has been paying off...and I'm proud of you."

Call Jason Bonnie and Clyde cause he feels like he's been shot. Not in a bad way, but shot with love bullets...which honestly sounds childish and stupid to Jason, but it also means a lot! His heart feels like it's going to burst at the mushy, gooey feeling running through it at those gently and lovingly said words. Jason actually feels like shooting something because he feels so flustered, but this is beyond extra points for him-THIS. IS. EVERYTHING!

The nineteen year old just delights in Richard managing to stumble in place, he soaks up Tim's eye twitch and most definitely basks in the Demon Brat's ® murderous aura. This is a dream come true-what the hell does Timothy think he is doing?

Tim lowers himself to the floor near Jason and puts on cleaning gloves, letting them snap against his wrists while glaring at the older boy. "I-I'm so sorry for being a bother and mess...I'll help Jason clean up! And I'm sorry for trying to throw the knife at him, that wasn't right of me and I-I knew better." Oh...so Tim is playing his 'I'm so insecure, please love me' card...and shit does it tend to work! The little scheming weasel just smirks in victory when Bruce actually walks over and touches his head gently, "Look at me. You aren't ever a bother nor will you ever be one. You are still young and you are all brothers...I don't know what else I expected from leaving you all alone? But you said sorry and it's all good now."

Tim makes puppy eyes at Bruce and looks back at Jason, "I'm also sorry to you too. I shouldn't have been so violent."

Jason freezes at the look in Tim's eyes, the little brat knows exactly what he's doing by apologizing to him willingly on top of admitting his fault. If Jason doesn't answer...he will seem like a jerk and will no doubt disappoint Bruce if he doesn't forgive the other. Which is why Jason just stares at Tim before smirking and saying understandingly, "I forgive you. And I guess the knife throwing is payback for me trying to murder you in my Pit induced rage. We're even now."

The unexpected comment makes Tim smile and giggle, Jason also chuckling at being caught off guard by the younger boy's laugh, the two cough simultaneously at realizing that they are...getting along?

That is gross and Jason will definitely punch at his punching bag later while imagining it's Tim's face.

Damian watches this all unfold with a fiery look in his eyes, he knows his father will probably notice him and talk to him about apologizing or some crap like that...but he can't apologize to those bastard children, he's too proud for that. So, the boy decides to play his "I was literally raised by assassin's so there is most definitely a cultural difference here" card. Damian looks down at the salmon in his hands and smiles, impressed by his own genius while hopping down the chair and walking up to Bruce with a wide-eyed look, salmon held up to Bruce like a cat bringing an offering to its owner.

"Father! I thought this experience was most fun-" Damian tilts his head cutely and makes sure to smile big for his dad, making sure his chubby face is the center of attention-"Do you not usually have such riveting food fights?"

Bruce softens at the cute look but raises his brow at Damian, "No...we usually don't. Did you have food fights?" Bruce can't really imagine Talia or Ra's allowing that, but he also wouldn't be surprised if their food fights consisted of skin melting acid, hidden blades or poison somehow being in the food as a twisted form of training. Damian frowns and lowers his salmon somewhat while frowning sadly, making sure to turn his face down enough that all Bruce can see is his round cheeks puffed out into a pout, "Grandfather and mother would beat me or lock me away if I ever dared to. I want to apologize for making a mess , father, I promise I shall not disappoint you again!"

The boy looks back up at his father with a determined look, making sure his eyes show some sort of nervousness while doing so, delighting in Bruce looking at him lovingly. "Damian, you didn't disappoint me. You didn't even know better really, but now that you do I know you'll never do it again, yeah?" Bruce reaches his hand down to gently brush his thumb against Damian's cheek, finally realizing how dirty his son is, the man chuckles softly and borrows a few paper towels from Jason (who begrudgingly handed some to Bruce) and cleans up Damian's hand and face.

"How about we go get you cleaned up? I know you don't need my help to clean yourself, but I can run your bath for you if you'd like?"

Damian's eyes shine happily at the offer, his small hand slipping into Bruce's as they exit the dining room. "I would like that very much! You can even wash my hair...if you'd like?" Bruce smiles at Damian copying him and squeezes the small hand gently, "I would like that very much."

Jason, Tim and Richard watch flabbergasted at how the little demon managed to win again. Alfred's voice suddenly chimes in humorously from the kitchen, "How many points does he have now?"

The three boys groan loudly while planning the downfall of Damian Wayne.

(Bruce about Tim apologizing for attempting to throw a knife (that was most definitely at Jason): "But you said sorry and it's all good now."

Jason looking at Bruce confused: "He tried to throw a knife at me!!!"

This is a post made for my Birthday today! This was actually written on 2/29/24 at like...11 something in the morning I think and finished at 6:28 PM in the afternoon.

Will the eldest boys actually ever cause Damian's downfall? Will Bruce truly find out about what his gremlin family is doing? Will Alfred continue to egg the kids on? Stay tuned for the next episode of Dragon ball-

I'm just playing. If anyone likes this, I appreciate you loves. Please remember to stay safe, happy, healthy and of course lovely as always. 💛)

[theroyalsims]

GUS TAKES ANYA ON A DATE WEARING MUDDY BOOTS - INSIDERS WORRY HE MIGHT NOT FIT IN WITH ROYALS

Lovebirds Anya and Gus were once again photographed holding hands, this time while strolling around the Harbour District here in the city.

Gus, Anya's new-old-boyfriend (a.k.a her first love), seem to be unfazed by the massive media scrutiny and attention they've both been receiving, after going public with their relationship.

While many royal watchers seem to approve of down-to-earth Gus, what with his seeming love for flannel, unkempt hair, bushy beard and lowly work boots, Anya's new boyfriend has also ruffled some feathers, especially those within the "institution."

A well-placed palace source reveals that there have been some concerns about how Gus might not be the right guy for Anya:

"He seems very... simple, very 'everyman' type, if you will. Now, most people might think that's adorable, you know, future Queen slumming it with a man in flannel and denim and all that, but it's already causing trouble within the palace walls."

"As early as now, there are some growing concerns about Gus and whether he's the right man for Anya. They have history, yes, but they did also break-up at one point. What was the problem that they had to go their separate ways? That right here might be an indication that this relationship will again break down."

"And then of course, there's Gus himself - he's no longer just Anya's teenage love... he's evolved into this lumberjack-looking wall of tattooed muscle with his messy beard, wrinkled clothes, and long hair. People at court just cannot imagine him attending a state banquet or a formal reception. They're worried he might trudge around in his muddy work boots, and soil the carpets."

Speaking of muddy boots, the "concerns' about Gus and his fashion sense might have some weight to it. For yesterday's date, Gus chose a red flannel shirt, which he paired with his go-to jeans and very, very muddy work boots. His long hair was at least kept neat in a man-bun. His rough look was in stark contrast to Anya, who opted for a simple white shirt, skinny jeans and §1,700 slingbacks.

Just as the source shared, people online are already split about Gus. One commenter wrote:

"FFS, how hard is it to clean off the mud? I get that you're looking for the humble, blue collar vibe, but really? You're going out IN PUBLIC with a freaking FUTURE QUEEN. The least you can do is look presentable. Maybe iron that shirt, wear something else other than your work clothes. You're going on a DATE, not to one of your construction sites."

Another posted:

"Maaan. Anya traded down. Mario was kinda psycho stalkerish, but at least the man knew how to look good. Come to think of it, even the boxer vet was a better dresser than this bloke. I don't get the appeal. I like my guys looking like they've showered... or at least heard of soap... and maybe buy clothes from real shops, not just thrift stores or their dad's closet."

Meanwhile, some were also quick to defend Anya and Gus from the bashers:

"THIS is exactly why Anya fights super hard to keep her private life out of the public eye. She's finally comfortable enough to flaunt their love and people are nitpicking again, questioning her choices and tearing down her boyfriend. For what? Some mud on his boots. Ridiculous. He's insanely handsome, like a romance novel hero come to life! What are y'all talking about? And the only thing I think should be improved is his beard - it's a shame because the scruff is hiding his lovely dimples! A bit of a trim should do the trick! "

Another Anya fan wrote:

"If people could just back off and let the poor girl and her man breathe! Why are you all so triggered? You're not dating him, she is! If she likes him the way he is, who are you to say otherwise? Anya really can't do anything right... when she's single, she's being pressured to find a man and pop a baby. Now that she's dating, she's being told that she's dating the wrong guy. And for those claiming that he's a no-good gold-digger, please! I'm Tartosan. The man's company is huge and the guy is loaded. I think Anya looks happy - they both look very happy, and at the end of the day, that's what counts.""

Will Gus' lifestyle really be an issue? And considering their previous break-up, is history bound to repeat itself? For what it's worth, Anya does seem very happy and very secure in their newly-rekindled love. I guess only time will tell if these two have staying power the second time around.

[desmond69miles]

I am having such bad writers block but so many ideas it's physically affecting me?!? Even writing this made me ball my fists in frustration like that one arthur meme. AO3 is down and I have nothing better to do oh my god I'm going to KILL YMSELGFDKO

"Okay Lynn I understand you have writers block why don't you take a break?" SHUT HSIAFHSDOFJISDFNJKISDNJFS SHUP SHUT UP I have MANY ideas and have to put them out there so either another assassin's creed fanfic writer can borrow my ideas or I'll come back and write them later. So, please enjoy my wild rampage about assassin's creed characters.

(Also I HEAVILY doubt that someone will see these and be like "huh, I'm going to write something based on this." IF YOU DO DECIDE TO DO THAT, TAG ME!!! I want to see your work.)

Either Jacob or Evie falling in love with a templar reader, but the templar reader in question is none other than Starrick's only child and heir (A bit like Elise and Arno, to be honest). My mind has been stuck on this for so long it is actually driving me insane. I think Jacob would be more the type to have a forbidden love with a very important Templar, and bonus brownie points if the relationship is very angsty and full of conflict with Starrick and Jacob. Wait wait wait wait wait -- Jacob and Evie kill Starrick, we know this, but what if reader actually liked their father? What if after Starrick dies, reader hates Jacob????

Ratonhnhaké:ton (Connor) I feel would be a sweet lover. Like the type to bring you small trinkets from the places he visits and the type to teach you how to use a bow for hunting. I think it'd be fun to see a fic where Connor takes reader hunting for the first time (which is more just a tag-along visit) and either A) Reader doesn't have it in them to watch Connor skin/prepare the animal or B) Reader is fascinated with the skill of preparing an animal for consumption/skinning one and Connor is teaching them all the little tips and tricks to it.

I like the few fics I've seen where reader is Shay Cormac's child and either falls in love with Arno or doesn't agree with the templar ways, but what if somehow Shay's child is raised by the Templars and later reunites with their dad through Haytham, Gist, etc? A gold star if his child is absolutely chaotic and reeking havoc while Haytham and Shay try to fix the large messes made. (Shaytham agenda arise)

I NEED my girl Elise to be written for more. NEED. It'd be cute to see reader who's Elise's ladies maid and is absolutely crushing on the beautiful redhead, but readers a bit hesitant due to Arno and, of course, the air around same-sex couples back then. Come some holiday and Elise takes notice of readers crush on her, and just like casual comfort??

I had a dream a few nights ago where I looked like Rose from Titanic and was Jacob's wife (we were both older and had a son) and I came back from France and the nursemaid despised me because she was jealous of me and Jacob's marriage. I'm not sure how this could be written out but hey, if you want the nursemaid to destroy a marriage, go ahead.

Shit that's all I got in me I've been done for Bye bye It's time to go back into my cave

[queenjunothegreat]

What do you think about the powers of the demigods in canon? Especially those of the children of the Big Three?

I love Percy but I think Rick went a bit overboard with all the powers he gave him. Thalia and Jason are children of the king of the gods and have pretty pathetic powers, at least in my opinion.

In GENERAL, I'm pretty okay with Percy's powerset. I think healing him with water was maybe a BIT much, and it seems wildly unfair to have him be able to control ALL types of liquid. Like, sure I'll accept lakes and rivers and stuff because those would have nereids or some other kind of spirit who might have some sort of allegiance to Poseidon, but I feel like it should for sure be up to them what powers he gets and how much control he has. It's kind of hard to put a HARD limit on what his powers should be though because Poseidon has just a LAUNDRY list of titles. The talking to horses thing ABSOLUTELY has to stay, idc what other powers you take from him.

Nico and Hazel I feel are in a pretty good spot, in all honesty. I really like the fact that Nico's powers focus more on the dead whereas Hazel's focuses on the riches aspect of Hades/Pluto. I haven't read ToA or TSATS so I'm not SUPER familiar with all of Nico's powers beyond raising the dead, but his powers do seem to really overshadow Hazel's sometimes, which is a bit of a bummer. She does have her Mist skills, though, so maybe that balances it out.

Now. The REAL talking point. Thalia and Jason. While it does seem like their powers are absolutely wimpy compared to the other three Big Three kids we've seen, I don't NECESSARILY think that's a bad thing? Like, the powers demigods have are often described as gifts from their parents. Zeus... doesn't strike me as the type to be handing out gifts to his kids, and I think that would go DOUBLE for Jason. Like, not only is Jason not even really his kid anymore after he gave him to Juno, there is a bit of a... family tradition of the youngest son killing and overthrowing his dad. I highly doubt Jupiter is gonna pile his bouncing baby boy with the tools needed to kill and overthrow him. That being said, I think it would have been neat to see Jupiter give him powers that wouldn't necessarily be enough to overpower gods, such as making him extra strong or just SUPER sturdy. Jason survived getting struck by lightning? Oh, he's not immune to lightning, he's just built like that. Stuff that would give Jason the edge over most demigods so that Jupiter can brag about his son being better than everyone, but not enough to be a threat. Also, my BIGGEST gripe about Jason's powers is that he should be able to use them as easy as breathing. He doesn't even have to THINK about it. Like, number one he is JUPITER'S kid. The air is his father's domain it does what he says no questions asked. And number two he's been doing this since before he learned how to spell his name. He has as much training than the rest of the Seven PUT TOGETHER. Thalia is a slightly different case, because I honestly think she would actively avoid using any powers that relate her to her father, like, at all. She could be twice as tricked out as Percy and she'd still be like "Fuck you, dad, I'm not using any of this shit." I mean, her most iconic weapon is her shield which is a symbol of ATHENA. She wants as little to do with Zeus as possible, so there's no telling what her powers could be if she actual tried to use them. Probably not very much, if I'm being honest because Zeus is shit.

Anywho, sorry for the yap! Thanks for the question!

[comicaurora]

any tips on how to write a non protagonist-y protagonist? (as in, a protagonist that is not at all the leader of the team, generally isn't the most Morally Righteous, and has more lancer characteristics than protag characteristics)

I could probably give helpful thoughts if the question was more specific, but this is hella broad. The protagonist is just the character who's the central focus of the story, there's nothing inherently heroic about the role. Following an unheroic lead can be compelling for all sorts of reasons, but they're all very specific to the character and story.

Just for a quick look into the scope of this question, a few examples: Hamlet is compelling because he's a Hot Mess in a world of slightly more lukewarm messes; Chicago is compelling because every protagonist is so spectacularly awful you're rooting for their success just so you can watch them crash and burn; Death Note is compelling for similar reasons, with the added bonus of watching two terrible people pitted against each other - but while stories with protagonists that are terrible people can be fun in a "watching a trainwreck" sort of way, there are also stories with unheroic protagonists that the audience hopes become more heroic, which is the entire pull of Logan, Mandalorian season 1, the early stages of The Last Of Us, and basically everything in the "serious grumpy dad" genre where we spend some time waiting for the damaged loner to figure out he's adopted a baby.

Tons of stories have main characters that aren't the leaders of whatever team they're on, and that can be fun because it gives them a leader to follow or rebel against - Hellsing Ultimate is all about the chain of command on both the protagonist and antagonist side, and the nominal main character Alucard is a morally incomprehensible eldritch abomination who's the scariest thing in the entire show. He's fun to watch because he's a literal living nightmare and every time a bad guy looks like they've got him on the ropes he just goes "neat" and farts out a hellhound or a knife tornado or something and rips them to shreds. Then there are about a million cop shows with a protagonist who's a Loose Cannon who Don't Play By The Rules, almost always defined by their rebellion against the exasperated leader who has a duty to actually follow and enforce the law. Copaganda aside, there's a lot of ways to write a character operating under a protagonist-y but potentially unhelpful authority.

Hell, if you squint, a ton of heroic characters are ultimately motivated by entirely selfish drives - which, if unpacked, end up looking very questionable in the morals department, despite the protagonist being a broadly likable person. Last Airbender has this in spades, with Aang's entire arc taking him from the starting motivation of "my responsibility as Avatar will stop me from having a life and I don't want that so I'll run away" to "my responsibility as Avatar is at odds with my Air Nomad philosophy against taking life and I don't want that so I'll find a way to stop Firelord Ozai without killing him". His initial motivation was obviously a lot less heroic, but through the entire story Aang holds onto his personal wants and desires, which is on paper a selfish and unheroic thing for the Chosen One to do - but in the context of Avatar, a war story about a group of children saving the world, it is the ultimate victory of the story that Aang and his friends don't have to sacrifice their personal happiness to win. The fact that Aang can still be a little bit selfish means that the war didn't take everything from him, and if he'd done the "heroic" thing of selflessly sacrificing his own spiritual needs to end the war as fast as possible, from a narrative standpoint it would've been a pyrrhic victory at best, because the Fire Nation would've succeeded in destroying him.

These are all wildly distinct stories, and trying to draw a few easy tips and tricks from them would be borderline impossible, since they're all doing "unheroic protagonist" in totally different ways.

[winterfireice]

Chapter 2 has been posted of stinex/sokeefe fic hope you enjoy!

I don’t know if people want to be tagged for future chapters so let me know if it’s annoying: @frizzle-mcshizzle @doodle-do-wop

Full chapter under cut

“So Verdi is fully out of her pen at this point and running wild,” Edaline is telling Keefe and Sophie, “Grady and I have to chase her through the woods and the only way we got her back into her pen was to lure her through the trees with snacks,” Eda laughs with Grady who couldn't stop smiling at his wife,

Family dinners in the Ruewen house were pretty rare due to Sophie’s busy schedule and the fact that the animals at Havenfeild were constantly causing trouble, luckily the family had all adjusted to the craziness of their lives and tried to have at least two family dinners a week. A development from the last few years was Keefe being a regular member at least once a week.

Those days usually included a lot more epic stories of Verdi's escapes or other rehabilitation disasters. Sometimes one of Sophie’s parents even tried to slip in a Sophie story, which made her immediately blush and send Keefe a wave of embarrassment.

“How long did it take you guys to secure her?” Keefe asks with a bit of amazement in his voice. Sophie always loved her parents' stories but watching her boyfriend love them too was a different type of enjoyment,

“Hours, I still think the only reason she was able to be tricked back to her pen was that she was about to miss dinner,” Grady says still laughing,

“Makes sense, I am also easily persuaded by food. I mean these dinners are definitely what keep me going through the week,” Keefe half-jokes,

“Well you know you are always welcome here, even if Sophie is busy,” Edaline winks,

Dinners without Sophie rarely happened but were not unheard of. Once Sophie had been so busy with Mr. Forkle that she didn't have time to text Keefe or her parents that she was going to be late. When she did finally get home she found a very stressed out Keefe sitting at the table with her dad. Edaline was apparently also busy with one of the animals so the two of them spent the rest of the night laughing at their retrospective partners' inability to maintain conversions with each other.

“Thank you, it means a lot,” Keefe says barely above a whisper, “Ironic timing though because Elwin wants me home soon, so I should probably leave you Rue-Wins for the night,”

“Oo that was not one of your best babe,” Sophie responds standing up with him, “But I appreciate the effort,”

~~~

At this point, Sophie is starting to believe that her life revolves more around homework and documents than it does about anything else. She was sitting on top of her bed with books laid around her and was trying to finish a paper about the treaty between elves and ogres which Sophie found both hilarious and boring.

During her seventh imparter check (just to see if anything interesting enough was going on so that she did not have to keep working) it actually started to ring.

Stina’s face filled the screen and it seemed like she had just gone for a run or something because her hair was tied back and there was sweat all over her face,

“Were you serious before?” Stina’s voice fills the room before Sophie’s hand even leaves the accept button,

“I am going to need more context before I answer that question,” Sophie responds,

“When you said I could call you about the… thing,”

“Oh,” Sophie signs out of realization, “You mean the, having a huge crush on Dex thing?”

“I never said huge,” Stina snarks, ‘But yes that thing,”

“Then yes I was serious, super serious,” Sophie adjusts and practically throws her notebook to the other side of the bed, only somewhat overestimating her strength and sending the book toppling over the edge and to the floor,

“What was that sound?” Stina asks alarmed,

“My patience for distractions crashing, go back to Dex,”

“I don’t know! He just is always there, on my mind there, in the room there just always there,” Stina grumbles, “and you want to know what is also always there? His dimples and those should not be as cute as they are,”

“Why do you sound so angry about this? Isn't this a good thing?” Sophie smiles,

“No, It's awful I hate this feeling,”

“It gets better I promise,” Sophie reassures her while chuckling,

“Stop laughing! This is not funny,” Stina says starting to laugh, “Ah, I hate feelings and emotions,”

“You’re literally an empath,”

“And you are the only person who has hand-picked abilities,”

“I had no control over that. I also feel like we are losing control of this conversion, we should go back to Dex and his dimples,”

“You are the worst,” Stina grumbles,

“Stina, you are the one that called me,”

“Well I regret it,” She mutters half-heartedly,

“No, you don’t, admit it you’re happy you have someone to talk to about this,”

“I will not admit it, but I won’t deny it either,”

“I knew it!” Sophie exclaims, “You should tell Dex though, the two of you would make an adorable couple,”

“I don’t even know how I would go about talking to him about this,”

“Well I do not recommend doing what Keefe and I did which is dance around your feelings until you’re so confused you start to believe it’s platonic,” Sophie advises

“Trust me, you were the only one that thought it was platonic. The two of you were very obviously falling in love with each other,” Stina says, “Oh shoot, I have to go, one of the unicorns is trying to escape again,”

“Again?” Sophie asks, the question gets no response though as Stina’s image flickers away from the screen,

~~~

“KEEFE! KEEFE! KEEFE!” Silveny, screams in Sophie's mind, causing her eyes to crinkle together a little,

“She screaming already?” Keefe asks noticing the discomfort in Sophie’s face,

“Isn't she always? It's fine just takes a minute to adjust to it,” Sophie says to him before transmitting to Silveny, “Yes he is here, but I need you to be a little bit quieter so I can also be here,”

All she gets is more “Keefes” but they are at least quieter and make Sophie laugh,

“Hey I think she may be trying to beat me in the ‘who loves Keefe the most’ game,” She says as Keefe brushes his hand down Silveny’s mane,

“Well I’m sorry Silveny but I think I know who I want the winner to be and it's not you sweet girl,”

“You are the only saying that because we are on a date right now,” Sophie jokes,

“I will never tell, think of it as a fun way to add mystery into our relationship,” Keefe tells her playfully,

“I think we have enough mystery in our lives, I mean I was literally a mystery to the Lost Cities for a while,”

“Yeah but you're my favorite mystery,” he tells her blushing,

“You are adorable and a flirt,” Sophie says while she also blushes, “Anyway, how was your day? We haven't talked since dinner last night,”

“Pretty boring,” Keefe responds, “I’m not saying I miss school but life is not as interesting when I don’t have a girlfriend to bug or teachers to torment, but I am enjoying being able to torment Nobles at Slurps and Burps,” He says as they sit down in the flower field which was today’s date night destination,

After Keefe graduated Foxfire Kesler offered him a job for as long as he wanted. His job was usually just putting elixirs away and coming up with creative names for new ones but every once in a while, Keefe was allowed to make some which left very few people with injuries by the end of the day.

“I did have an interesting phone call with Dex yesterday though,” he smirks,

“Oh,” is all Sophie responds with, trying to keep her face calm,

“You know you just sent me a wave of excitement right?” Keefe says smiling, “What do you know?” he questions,

“I don’t know anything… unless you know something,” Sophie says smiling just as big,

“Well, how do I know if I know something if I don’t know what you know?”

“I don’t know,” Sophie says,

“Is it just me or does the word ‘know’ now have no meaning to you?”

“It’s not just you,” Sophie reassures him, “Okay I can’t tell you what I know but I can tell you that last night after you left I also had a very interesting conversation with someone but it was not Dex,”

“Was it Stina?” Keefe tries

“It was,” Sophie says as both of their smiles get bigger

“So you do know what I know,” he smiles,

“I think I do, or at least I know a part of something you know,”

“This is amazing, I mean they are not at all a pairing I expected but I am already imagining their wedding,”

“Keefe I love how excited you are but Stina and Dex are not even dating yet, you need to slow down just a little,” Sophie says after her eyes widen, “By the way I want to know how you found out,”

Dex called me after I got home after dinner, and he just told me. He said that out of everyone I would know how he was feeling when crushing on one of your friends. How did you find out?”

“Stina has been talking to herself in French about how she feels about Dex for weeks after Team Vailent meetings, she seems to be pretty bad at remembering I can understand every language that exists,” Sophie laughs, “I finally told her I knew what she was saying and she called me about it last night. I think she may still be in a little bit of denial about her feelings,”

“I remember what being on the other side of that feels like,” Keefe jokes which earns him a handful of grass being thrown at him by his girlfriend, “Hey cease fire, cease fire, I was just telling you the truth,”

“It still deserves grass throwing, but I will also apologize if needed,” Sophie grins,

“Well the grass was very sharp, I could have been seriously injured, I think I deserve compensation,” Keefe says

“What kind of compensation?” Sophie asks,

“I think I kiss would cover it,”

“Deal,” Sophie says leaning towards Keefe,

[free-for-all-fics]

Stupid, silly Namor or Attuma fic ideas. Don’t think too hard about these they’re just funny little ideas. Pls tag me if you write or get inspired by any of these. Like always, there are no rules:

1. The reader is labeled as the village idiot because she likes to sing with her head underwater to "sing to the mermaids". The village ridicules her for it. One day, she is swept out in a riptide, and no one is willing to come to her aid—no one from the village, that is.

2. Reader is full of bad puns and dad jokes, much to the chagrin of Namor/Attuma. "Why are seagulls called seagulls?"

“Stop now.”

“Because if they flew over bays, they'd be bagels! Oh hey, What did one wave say to the other?"

“I swear, if you make one more ocean related pun, I will murder you on this island and tell everyone you died in a shipwreck."

"...well, someone's salty."

3. You put a message in a bottle and set it out to sea in the hopes it’ll reach Namor/Attuma so you can be pen pals. “Oh my god I love you but you’re so stupid.” They say because you have no idea that’s not how mail works.

4. You’re in love with Namor/Attuma, but you’re also obsessed with monsters and cryptids so you keep asking them questions like “Is the Kraken real?? What about 6 headed hydras? Have you seen Nessie?? Are they friendly? Darling tell meeeeeee”

5. Reader does that stupid prank thing where she pretends to do a magic trick with an egg and a bottle of water. She’s like “Ok now look inside” and squeezes the bottle, spraying water in Attuma/Namor’s face and runs away cackling.

6. You introduce Namor/Attuma to a wonderful human invention - Water beds. They are less than amused. Reader, consider your sexy time privileges revoked😑

7. Attuma/Namor trying to teach reader combat and how to fight like a Talokanil but reader keeps making it sexy and Namor/Attuma is like “Ok maybe we should stop. You’re not even listening to me or learning anything properly!” And reader is like “Oh I’m learning all the right techniques perfectly. 😏😘”

8. Those videos from EVNautilus of the people in a submarine coming across a dumbo octopus and a googly eyed stubby squid but instead it’s scientist reader being shown Talokan by Attuma or Namor and fawning over the sea creatures because they’re just little guys. Sweet underwater babies. And reader being like “it’s just a baby can I adopt it pls” 🥺 and Namor or Attuma being like “pay attention. Remember why we’re here.”

9. “Your child brings home a raccoon, mistaking it for a cat and begs to keep it” trope but instead it’s Namor/Attuma and their child has brought home an anglerfish or some other hideous abomination of the sea. It’s surprisingly docile and follows the child around like a pet anyway so can we keep it??? Please father 🥺

10. Namor and Jeff the Land Shark crossover. That’s it. That’s the post. Reader wants to adopt Jeff as their child. He’s just a baby 🥺

11. Peter Pan “They were just having a bit of fun, weren’t you, girls?”

“We were only trying to drown her” Mermaid Lagoon AU

12. “General, I’ve brought the cartographer into the war meeting today. I believe you owe her an apology for ruining all her maps when you stab them to dramatically mark a location.” (What if the “cartographer” is actually Attuma’s small daughter or sister drawing doodles of maps and playing pretend/mirroring what her dad or brother does because she wants to help and it’s all in jest hehe)

13. 2 days ago you went to an animal shelter and adopted the most adorable cat. What you don’t know is, he’s the reincarnation of an Aztec god. Your food offerings are unacceptable and that ugly small box that feels like it’s made from scratchy carpet will not do. No. He’ll be sleeping in your bed with you. Don’t try to lock him out; he’ll just scream and sing the songs of his people until you let him back in. (Or maybe through a magic mishap Namor has been accidentally transformed into a cat. Yeah Namor as a cat AU. I told you these ideas were silly.)

14. “Would you still love me if I was a worm” meme With Namor or Attuma but instead it’s “Would you still love me if I was a sea cucumber” or something ocean related

15. Namor or Attuma are taking their daughter trick or treating this year and ask what she wants to be for Halloween. A superhero, a mermaid, a princess? No. She wants to be a horseshoe crab. Possible Modern AU.

16. Reader goes to the beach often and befriends the seagulls/pelicans. So they start to bring her gifts like shells, rocks, etc. Except one day they bring you a golden bracelet, beaded necklace, or jade earrings (your choice of which). It’s unlike anything you’ve ever seen before. A few days later, Namor shows up at the beach, looking very annoyed as he asks for his necklace/bracelet/or earrings back.

17. You and Namor or Attuma meet on the beach in your special spot. You don’t get to be with him often considering he’s kept away by his responsibilities and loyalty to Talokan, and you’re human. It’s usually your only chance to have time where you can just quietly love each other. Except a stupid fucking seagull or pelican has been following you to both the beach and your home; squawking incessantly, wreaking havoc and basically cockblocking you. Untitled Goose Game AU but it’s a seagull/pelican.

[gt-jar]

8 for the story ideas

8. John & Noah: Human AU

This is something I'll definitely write some day, maybe not in the near future, but eventually I will I SWEAR!

I think this one is pretty self-explanatory, but in case it isn't.

In this story John will be a human and Noah will be a borrower. And the story takes place in the modern world. Also Noah is going to be a bit younger.

As a reminder, in "Two Worlds among the Stars" Noah is 15 and in this AU he'll be 11 oder 12.

As for the plot:

Noah, who would've guessed, doesn't have parents anymore. A surprise, I know. But unlike in "2WATS", the loss is more recent.

Noah got separated from them (don't know if Noah's dad sticked around in this one yet) while they were moving. Now on his own, Noah does what his parents told him to do in this case.

Find a safe house and wait for them there. (He's been waiting for maybe a month, when he and John meet for the first time, and while he's still hopeful, deep down he knows that the won't come back.)

The house/apartment Noah finds shelter in is, again who would've guessed, John's.

It's perfect for borrowering:

- only one human

- no kids

- no pets

- leaves the house for several hours

- goes to bed early

But like in every borrower story, the borrower gets caught eventually :)

Noah's doom is...

The sink

Noah falls in during one night and can't get out on his own and as John gets ready for work (suggestions for what John's job would be in the modern world?) he finds him still stuck there in the morning.

John, just like in "2WATS", has NO IDEA what to do and is utterly overwhelmed with the situation, cause FUCK! THERE'S A TINY CHILD INSIDE HIS SINK!

And because John doesn't wanna be late for work (and his brain is having kind of a meltdown) he has a short circuit reaction.

He puts a tea towel in the sink so Noah can climb out on his own.

After that their lifes go on relatively normal, except Noah can't wrap his head around the fact that a human let im go, and John is doing internet research (I really like the idea that John's mom read "the borrowers" to him and his sister when they were children).

Soon...ish? The next sink incident happens (don't really care if that makes sense or not)

Noah goes out to borrow during the day and falls in the sink again, except this time it's filled with water.

And Noah being a borrower can't swim :)

He manages to keep himself afloat for some time, but his strenth is fading fast and he starts to panic.

The situation gets a little worse until John finally comes home.

Noah, who's seconds away from drowning, screams ("screams" is a little exaggerated, cause there's not enough air inside his lungs to really scream) for help when he hears John enter the apartment.

One near-death experience later, John is sitting on his sofa with one sleeping borrower (wrapped in a tea towel) in his arms (Noah passed out from exhaustion).

Now the unthinkable happens:

John lets Noah go AGAIN!

Why you might ask? Well... John thinks there's no way someone as small and young as Noah is on his own. There have to be parents or some kind of adults around to take care of him. There's no way the kid managed to survive on his own for that long. Right?

Right...

John puts him on the kitchen counter and doesn't leave his bedroom until he's certain Noah woke up and left.

Meanwhile, Noah is losing his mind.

This human let him go not only one but TWO TIMES! This goes against everything he has been taught! He wants to know what this human is up to, so against his better judgement...

He activly seeks John out. He's on top of the fridge or something where John can't reach him, but he's willing revealing himself to a human.

And then they have a conversation.

Aaaaaaand the rest is a mystery :)

You'll have to wait unil I write this story for real.

Or you can ask more questions about it, that works too. It's a neat little trick to make writers reveal more of their storys. It works most of the time ;)