#its absolutely crazy to look at next to the original

[ghostgirl101]

Can we get some headcanons of Jeff t.K. in a relationship? ^^

Dating Jeff The Killer Would Be Like This:

A/N: Well, this is a long overdue request, hope the wait was worth it 🙃 I’m going to be waiting for you all at least twice a week from now on, and there are a few spaces left for requests if you want to get yours in for Jeff and others now if you're interested 🔪 This is the original creepypasta Jeff, but I could try writing for David Near's version too if anyone's wondering... enjoy.

🔪• Well damn, there's a lot to include for this crazy son of a biatch, so get ready-

🔪• It's an uncomfortable night, the skies outside pitch black, stars clouded over and your curtains ruffling as you glare tiredly at the ceiling, wishing for sleep to overtake you. But there's just something that's keeping you half-aware, something that makes you toss and turn for a while, eyeing the window with a furrow of your brows. It's almost like someone's watching your every move. You just can't see them.

🔪• Until that whispering, hoarse voice pierces through the still silence from behind your curtains, making your eyes widen in horror at the sadistic chuckling that only gets nearer as you will your body to move from its frozen position.

🔪• The tip of his blade skims across the skin off your face before you can make out his own, pale and deathly and twisted with a nasty, deeply cut grin etched up his cheeks. His cold blue eyes linger over your features, and it’s a frustrating and vulnerable feeling knowing that can read you a lot better than you can him. It’s a tense few moments when all you feel is the end of the sharp dagger trace just light enough down a cheek and your lips, resting there for a second, as if he’s thinking.

🔪• Jeff doesn’t keep you alive just because you’re you - he doesn’t know who you are, or why you look, in his eyes, almost as beautiful as he does. But it makes him curious and confused, something he’s not used to and doesn’t particularly like at first. So with a scoff, the knife is suddenly snatched away, replaced with his face right down next to yours, with a “go to sleep~” and sudden darkness.

🔪• It’s a wonder to you when you wake up the next morning unharmed. It’s unheard of for the infamous killer to let his victims go, but after that night, it’s clear to you that what you experienced wasn’t some sort of weird nightmare. You feel eyes on you almost every minute of the day, footsteps that aren’t your own following you when you’re by yourself, shadows in the hall that turned out to be nothing…

🔪• The only times Jeff will make his appearances where you can actually see and talk to him is at night. At first, it's kind of to see how you'll react - scared and screaming panicking like the others, or oddly curious and mildly apprehensive - if you show the latter, he'll definitely be caught if guard, because he's used to the screaming and crying. But even if you do panic and start some weird chase scene around your house, Jeff seems to find it amusing, until he's had enough and corners you, hissing in your ear, "would you calm the hell down doll, you don't wanna wake the whole damn street, now do you?"

🔪• And you're like yes?!?? Because a scarred maniac is in my room and getting blood stains over my non-washable flooring??! Or maybe that's just me

🔪• This boy can be an absolute mystery to anyone who manages to survive him, because they never really figure out the solid reason why, or his whole backstory, his intentions, etc. All they know is that he's a killer who preys on young people at the night and disappears in the morning. Some survive him because they're interesting for a while, and die when they're not anymore. Some remind him of his past self, and on a bad day, he remembers how much he hates that and gets rid of them too. Some are just to play around with. And then there's you.

🔪• Jeff doesn't give you much of a reason either when you question his motives, because at first, he can't even be sure of why he's ket you around. Is it because you're pretty? Somehow different from his other victims? It's not because he's gone soft. The whole thought process ends up frustrating him, so he'll storm out the window to be alone and try taking his mind off it by going after some whiny targets. But still, he keeps thinking about the question, about you, watching him in some kind of awe and confusion. Why do you care? Why does he care?!

🔪• This whole thing is not some fast-paced cliche love story where everything's sappy and sweet and he'll kill everyone but you. He's still the infamous Jeff The Killer. But that doesn't mean he isn't a little soft for you. Just don't point it out, or he gets flustered and defensive.

🔪• At one point, he wanted to just kidnap you and have you with him all the time, but you had to put your foot down and promise to stick around every night for him to come and go as he pleases, which calmed him down. Because, yeah, that's not happening Jeff, calm yourselffff

🔪• It ends up being him popping in almost every night, with you learning to keep your windows open so you don’t have to keep on replacing the forced-in smashed glass. And even when he visits, it takes time for him to reveal himself, little by little, until you can make out all the rough burns and dried blood that blemish practically every inch of his skin. It's not that he's all insecure - he thinks he’s beautiful most days, and he’s not trying to make you feel less scared by his appearance, because him being the jackass that he is, finds jump scaring you funny.

🔪• But he can have bad days, days where he can't stop thinking about his brother and parents and all that made him who he is, and when that happens, he either bearly says anything and sulks with his knives in the corner of your room, and pretty much lets you do anything. Like, you could end up playing and studying his knives - he watches apprehensively at first, all ready for you to try to stab him in the back - but after time goes by and you've given up questioning yourself as to why you're letting a cold-blooded murderer hang out with you almost every night in your room, he sees that you're not trying to defend yourself in those extreme measures, so kind of lets you do your thing.

🔪• It's nice for him to have the company, too, and he enjoys the small conversations he has with you: the nosy, lucky, pretty little survivor who asks too many questions about him and has a smile that's almost as good as his. Him being him offers to carve one in, and still jokingly tries to while you fight him off with a string of curses. He can be really annoying when he wants to, because he finds your reactions cute. If, on the extremely rare occasions, you happen to see him before it goes dark, doing your homework or something, he'll try drawing on the paper or mucking around with your stuff to distract you. If you're watching something, he'll spoil the ending or give a stupid running commentary. If you annoy him back by any means you can, Jeff gets all pouty and frustrated, but it's also sort of endearing to him??

🔪• So he'll be all "are you freaking stupid, or just suicidal, antagonising a serial killer?!" but he can't help scoffing at you in some form of fondness that he hasn't even realised has been growing in him

🔪• When he ultimately realises that hey! you're stalking and killing the bullies of and are increasingly obsessing over this person, it takes him a bit of time to process. He might not show up on that night, wanting to get his thoughts straight, leaving you very confused, but Jeff does show up the next night wanting you to shut up and sit down and listen to him, because he doesn't want to make this any weirder than it feels for him. You'll hardly understand what he's getting at when he spurts out how you're different and he doesn't really believe in fate but something feels right and every Clyde needs his Bonnie and random crap like that 😂

🔪• You'll have to cut him off with a "so are you asking me out?" and he's like "well... yeah, duh. Don't even think about saying no, because you're not getting rid of me, even if you want to, alright?!?" You can tell he's uncharacteristically nervous. So when you've assessed the situation and see that there's no more harm than there already has been to saying yes, there's an unreadable look of shock and something more in his stony eyes. Then his grin is back, and he's annoying you again by whirling you around in the air and stuff, and boom! You're never getting rid of the maniac. He's yours. Congratulations.

🔪• I'm gonna be honest with you; dating Jeff The Killer is definitely not the easiest mountain you chose to climb, but at the end of the day, if all you want is his manic, obsessive love and devotion to you, then it's well worth it. Take the amount of obsessiveness and stalker behaviour he's shown to you as a weird-ass friend and multiply it by a thousand. I'm not kidding.

🔪• Jeff The Killer genuinely cares about those who have somehow made it to that point with him, and as you're at the top of that list, damn, you'll be spoiled. Don't ask him where he gets all the jewels and trinkets and things you've been wanting or that match your hobbies and talents, because they're yours, and they've always been yours. So your welcome, enjoy, he knew you'd like it. That's one way he shows his love. It's kind of like a way of saying that he's always thinking about you, which isn't an exaggeration at all. I can definitely imagine him killing for you with pride and bringing back a heart all casual-like, while you shake your head with an awkward smile.

🔪• "That's, uh, sweet of you, Jeff, but seriously, throw it away now, that's rank."

🔪• No one else catches his eye after you, too. He's never met someone truly beautiful, inside and out, before you, and he's convinced he won't after. So if someone tries to beg for their life or give him compliments he used to like, it's pretty much ineffective now. "You'll ever be as hot as my doll is, you sadass, but here, I'll carve a little something to get you halfway there~"

🔪• He can actually be surprisingly sweet when he wants to. On his bad days, now he'll just lean into you in silence and twirl his blade around, while you play with his hair or put something on TV or somehow end up staring at him. If you look closer and beyond the chalky white shade of his burnt skin and the deep, bloody scars that trace up from his lips, you can notice how he probably was a good-looking boy before the 'accident.' But don't let him catch you looking, because, bad mood or not, he's a cocky bastard, and will end up grinning and saying something like "it's rude to stare, dolly," which ruins the moment lmao

🔪• Jeff can also get clingy when he feels like it too, though he'll never admit it. He likes how your body's always warm when he is somehow always freezing, and being able to have time alone with you, where you're all his, and no one can take it away from him. He'll go freaking rabid if anyone tries, and no one wants that.

🔪• He gets a little awkward when it comes to comfort and opening up, but he'll get there. He learns from you to just give you a silent hug instead of patting you on the back and telling you to chin up or something stupid, or tries to make you laugh, or kills the thing that's getting you down, if you let him. That's your decision 🙃

🔪• He eventually opens up to you about his past, too, which takes him a lot of courage and a lot of patience for you. It's good that you know, though, because it's something to be even closer about, and the more you know about each other, the more you belong together. At least, that's Jeff's logic.

🔪• Jeff can be a bit possessive and sulky when those moments have to end in the mornings, and he's been known to just shove his white hoodie over your head and demand you wear it when he's not with you. Which is fine, Jeff, but seriously, clean that blood of it first.

🔪• But when all is said and done, no matter how heartless and cold and crazy he may seem, and undoubtedly is, he's sane enough to know that he loves you. His love can be ridiculously intense and overwhelming at times, but you can learn to work around or with it. He will do it. Whether anyone believes it or not, him and you knowing your love is enough for Jeff.

[dean-winchester-is-a-warrior]

Love and Lying Pt. 1

This will fill the "How bad is it?" space on my @jacklesversebingo card. The prompt will be bolded.

Summary: Will Y/N and Jensen love each other or live in lies?

Warnings/Explicit 18+: Angst - reader. Smut. Unprotected P in V sex. Fingering. Oral (f receiving). Jensen being kind of an asshole. Also being a hero, and a rockstar, and the sexiest mofo ever.

Pairings: Jensen Ackles x Y/N

Word Count: 6,230

A/N: So, this is kind of a joint request from the lovely @candy-coated-misery0731, and @envyaurora95. They saw this picture of Jensen...

(x)

...and after chatting about it, decided to very kindly ask if I could write something smutty for it. So, I have. 😊

This was supposed to be a one shot, but it will be a short two part series instead. Sorry! It got away from me, and ended up with much more plot than I was originally planning on. 😄 I'm hoping to have Part 2 up on the 23rd. The second part will also cover a square in the jacklesverse bingo - "Rumors". Hope this first part, at least, was what you were hoping for, my lovlies!

Also, the Radio Company song "Ain't No Telling" features in the story, and if you haven't listened to it, click here to do so. Definitely worth it!

A/N 2: As always, of course this is a Jensen from another part of the Multiverse, who is single. This is an absolute work of fiction.

The beautiful dividers, both below and at the bottom were created by @saradika

January

“Hey baby! I’m sorry, I know I said seven, but…” Y/N heard Jensen’s voice booming from the living room in the five star hotel suite they were staying in for the week. 

He walked into the bedroom with his phone in his hand. He was looking down at the screen and frowning; his voice was distracted.

“I was gonna text you, and then I was - “ He looked up from his phone to see Y/N sitting on the end of the bed. His smile started and then stopped as his eyes snagged on the two packed suitcases at her feet.

The room was suddenly silent, the noisy, ceaseless traffic sounds muted by their distance from the street thirty stories below them. Jensen closed his phone and slipped it into his pocket. He gave a brief nod to the suitcases.

“You’re packed and leaving.” He said, stating the obvious.

Y/N folded her hands in her lap, trying desperately to keep them from shaking. But her voice wavered as she responded. “Yes. Look, I think…I think it’s time we admit this isn’t working.”

Jensen’s face registered surprise. “Oh.” He said quietly. “Oh, you’re…you’re LEAVING - leaving. Like, for good, forever.”

Y/N felt his soft words pierce her heart. “I think…” she tried to get the words out past the lump in her throat. “I mean, you can’t tell me you think what we’re doing here is…you have to admit that this isn’t working.”

Jensen shook his head, the surprise fading from his face. In its place came the stubborn set of his chin, and the mask of nonchalance he wore when he was avoiding something. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“Don’t do that.” Y/N said, frustration seeping in. “Don’t act like I’m crazy, like I’m making things up.”

Jensen folded his arms across his chest. “Well, I can’t just pretend like I get it.”

Y/N gritted her teeth, frustrated at having to "explain" what they both knew. "I’ve hit a wall with you, Jensen, that I simply can’t get past. Can’t go over it, can’t go around it or through it. Ever since we’ve been together…this whole last year - ever since we decided to take our friendship to the next level, you’ve been keeping me at arms length. You don’t discuss things with me, not your worries or your wants. We don’t make decisions together, you won’t bring me into your life. We were so much closer when we were friends.”

She took a deep breath. “So, I think maybe we should go back to that.” She felt her stomach lurch as she made the suggestion. “Go back to being friends, I mean. I think you were happier that way.”

Jensen scoffed “Oh, was I?”

Y/N shrugged. “Weren’t you? You seemed to be. You talked to me about stuff then, seemed to value my opinion. Now, you just keep everything bottled up inside you. You don’t tell me anything, don’t share anything with me.”

Y/N stood up and walked to where Jensen was standing, anger radiating off of him. She laid her hand on his forearm. “Jensen.” She said softly, looking up into his face. He wouldn’t meet her eye. “Jensen, I love you.”

His jaw clenched and ticked, and she felt the muscles under her hand tense. She waited a moment and although she’d known she wouldn’t hear the words back - even though that had been her point in telling him one more time - the silence that greeted her still lit a burning ache in her chest. 

She stepped back, but Jensen shot his hand out to grab her wrist and keep her close. His voice was angry and exasperated. “Y/N look, do you want me to lie? Do you want me to just say the words and not have them mean anything?”

Y/N couldn’t help the tears that spilled down her cheeks. “No.” She whispered. “Of course I don’t. I want them to mean everything to you. I want you to feel the truth of them in your soul.” She shrugged and pulled her wrist out of his grasp, pretending her heart wasn’t splintering. “But that’s sort of the point - you don’t feel them, don’t mean them.”

She breathed deeply through her nose. “And that’s why I have to go. I love you but…”

“No, that’s the fucking point, Y/N.” Jensen raged as she bent to pick up her baggage. “You love me, ‘but’. That’s the whole problem. You’ll only love me on your terms, on your timetable. You love me, but you’re just gonna walk away because I won’t play along the way you want me to.”

Jensen was breathing hard, shouting now. “You can’t just force me into whoever you want me to be, can’t just mold me and -”

“Jensen.” Y/N cut him off with a soft, gentle voice. She stood with her bags in hand and shook her head at him, sadness overwhelming her. “Jensen, I’m not her. I’m not trying to mold you into something you’re not. I’m not trying to change you - don’t wanna change you. But…” 

Y/N took in another long, wavering breath and finished her earlier thought. “I love you, but I won’t be in love alone.” She shrugged. “It’s too lonely.”

She reached up on tiptoe to kiss his cheek, but he pulled away from her, and his eyes burned holes into her, the bright green was beautiful, but as hard as jade. “Just go then. Don’t bother with the platitudes. Dunno why you even bothered to stick around for good-bye.”

He spun on his heel and slammed out of the suite. Y/N couldn’t help dropping her bags to the ground and sinking back down onto the foot of the bed. Her stomach plummeted in disappointment once again, and as tears fell steadily down her cheeks, she was able to finally admit to herself that she’d been desperately hoping that he’d tell her to stay. It was probably stupid, but she’d hoped the threat of losing her for good would make him open up and let her in.

But it hadn’t. He wanted her gone. He’d much rather lose her than love her. For a wild moment she contemplated staying, trying to love enough for the both of them. But she knew that was impossible. She contemplated spending another year like the last, always doubting, feeling like she was so close to reaching him, just to have him pull away - just to watch him fall back into his charming ways, all smiles and quick jokes, and no real connection.

It was impossible, and it would only make it that much harder to leave later. So, she picked up her bags and said another silent goodbye to the man who’d hold her heart forever. 

“Be happy.” She whispered to the ghosts she left behind.

April

The bar was crowded and noisy; twenty years ago it would have been smoky too. The people inside were slightly rowdy, and ready for a good show. 

Y/N felt slightly overdressed in her little black dress. A few women wore something similar, but most women were just in short skirts and tube tops. The vast majority of guys were in t-shirts and jeans.

She sighed. Yep, overdressed.

She perked up slightly as she approached the table her friends were sitting at and saw Briana stand up to hug her, with Kim close behind. Kim wore a fancy top and sleek, shiny pants, and Briana’s dress was tight and black as well. They both looked gorgeous and Y/N was glad that at least she fit in a bit more with her own group. 

They were all here to watch Louden Swain perform their set, and Y/N was very excited. She loved the band so much; they were all such sweethearts, and she always had so much fun hanging out with the group. It had been too long.

As she gave both Kim and Briana a hug she was smiling wide, a smile that died quickly as she glanced towards the door and saw Jensen striding towards them.

“What the fuck?” Y/N whispered.

Briana looked over her shoulder and then turned back to stare worriedly at Y/N. “He’s…I mean, he’s probably just here to support the band, you know.”

As Briana finished talking, Jensen walked up to where Rob was standing beside the stage and pulled the smaller man into a tight hug. The two spoke close together, straining to hear each other over the music blaring from the loudspeakers. Finally Jensen pounded his friend on the back and turned towards the table Rob pointed at, where all his other friends were sitting.

He froze as he saw Y/N watching him over Briana’s shoulder. There was a very long pause where no one moved or said anything. It was finally Briana who broke it. She pushed Y/N towards Kim who scooted her over to the other end of the long table they sat at, while Briana walked briskly up to Jensen. 

She gave him a warm hug and said something into his ear. Y/N figured she was probably telling him the same thing she told her. They were here to support the band, and that was all. The table was big, and the bar was incredibly noisy.

There would be no need for them to interact.

But Y/N’s night was effectively ruined. She smiled at everyone and bopped along with the band as they performed. But her mind simply wasn’t there, it was ten feet down the table where Jensen sat between Rich and a blonde woman she didn’t recognize.

Y/N tried not to stare, but she couldn’t help but notice that the woman was beautiful…and that she kept touching Jensen. She laughed uproariously at everything he said, and she just kept putting her hands on him - touching his bicep to get his attention, or putting both her hands on his while she was laughing, her head bent towards his. 

Jensen seemed to be enjoying the company. He was talking with her and smiling, and he did nothing to discourage the touching.

As the band finished one song and were switching around some guitars for the next, Y/N leaned over to Briana. 

“Who’s the woman beside…Jason?” She asked, swapping out Jensen’s name with Jason’s at the last minute. But Briana saw through that anyway and gave her a sympathetic look. 

“I think her name is Tara. From what I know, she’s an old friend of Jason’s. But I’m not sure how they know each other. He’s brought her to a couple get togethers.” Briana shrugged. “She seems nice enough.”

Y/N nodded. “Oh. Cool.” She said quietly just as the band struck up the next song. She hadn’t thought her evening could get worse, and yet it had. And the worst was yet to come.

At the end of the song, Rob held a hand out towards their table. “I wanna give a big thanks to my cheering section over here.” The band clapped and the rest of the bar joined in. 

Rob’s smile was huge as he pointed a finger at Jensen. “Now, I need a little more help, onstage this time, and if we all cheer really loudly, we may just guilt my good friend, Mr. Jensen Ackles into joining us on stage!”

Rob finished with a yell as the bar exploded into cheers. Jensen was waving his hands and shaking his head, but the people around him were pushing him, quite literally to get up on the stage. Tara was pushing the hardest, shoving on his broad shoulder and then clapping excitedly when he got up.

Y/N felt her stomach twist in knots. This was too much.

Finally Jensen was cajoled, and physically forced onto the stage. He was smiling, but Y/N could tell he was nervous by the way he rubbed his hands together and then shoved them in his pockets. He bent slightly as Rob reached up to yell in his ear. Jensen seemed to think something over and then shrugged and nodded. 

Rob walked back to the microphone and lifted his hand and everyone quieted down to hear him. “Okay, so we always drag Jensen onstage to sing a song the band knows well, but we’ve all been practicing, and we really wanna do a Radio Company song with Jensen this time.”

Everyone clapped and cheered some more as Rob called out. “I’ll do my best to impersonate Steve.” He said with a laugh. “Okay, one of the songs we know well, and is primarily Jensen singing, is the song, ‘Ain’t No Telling’. And the man himself has agreed to sing it for us!”

There was more applauding as Jensen moved into position behind the lead microphone, and Rob moved into position a bit behind him, adjusting the mic stand there so that he could sing harmony. Mike started playing the soft piano that began the ballad, and the bar quieted down, ready to listen to Jensen’s angelic voice. 

Y/N, however, was panicking slightly, sure she'd never be able to take this. But I can't possibly get up and run out of here now. She thought desperately. It would be so obvious and make me look pathetic and weak. 

So she tried to brace herself, but still felt chills run down her spine as Jensen’s slightly raspy vocals filled the room.

Oh, the fact is Cold but true love Ain't no tellin' Who I am One day sweetness Next day laughter Followed by the anger Coming up from within Who are you holding onto now? Who are you holding onto now? When you need it And you know that I'm a little far away Ain't no tellin' no Where the hell I am Just believe in Every time When we feel it again Tell me, who are you holding onto now? Oh, who are you holding onto now?

Though Jensen didn’t look her direction during the entire song, she still felt like he was singing every line straight to her. 

He was so achingly beautiful, and so painfully, effortlessly sexy, it made Y/N's body thrum with want.

His hair had grown a bit longer in the four months since she'd seen him last, and it suited him very well. The honey and cinnamon colored waves fell forward over his forehead as he looked down at the stage, throwing shadows across his face. His eyes were closed, but even from ten feet away she could see the way his eyelashes brushed the tops of his cheeks. His soft, silky looking beard did a beautiful job of perfectly framing his luscious mouth. Y/N tried not to moan aloud as she remembered the perfect slide of those lips across her skin.

Everything about him - his voice, his eyes, his lips, his hands - even his rolled up sleeves that showed off his muscular, freckled forearms - it all made her ache terribly.

The song's lyrics made Y/N’s heart race fast, and crack into a million pieces at the same time. She looked towards Tara, who was staring raptly and adoringly at Jensen, and swallowed harshly, throwing the song's question back at him.

Who are you holding onto now?

As the song slowed to its conclusion and the bar went crazy, shouting and cheering, Y/N put a hand on Briana’s forearm and shot her a quick smile. “Be right back.” She said, nodding towards the restrooms in the back of the bar. She hated Briana’s look of pity and understanding. Y/N wanted to be nonchalant and cool about everything, but the wounds of Jensen’s absence were too fresh.

She stayed in the bathroom for nearly ten minutes just willing herself not to cry. She couldn’t go back out there with puffy eyes, on top of everything else. 

When she felt slightly less prone to bursting into tears, she washed her hands, took a deep breath, and faked a smile. 

The men and women’s washrooms were both down a long hallway, with the women’s at the very end. Just as she walked out, there was a guy walking out of the men’s room and wiping his hands on his jeans. He was medium height, with brown hair that was slicked back, and watery blue eyes that were slightly bloodshot. He wore jeans and a dark blue work shirt with a patch embroidered on the chest that said his name was “Bert.” 

He noticed Y/N and he smiled a greasy smile, the kind of smile guys wore when they hit on her, and were sure they were irresistible. Y/N gave a wan kind of smile in return, and tried to walk past him, but he moved to block the narrow hallway. 

“What’s your rush, cutie? Stay and chat awhile.” He said with another too-toothy smile.

Y/N’s smile faded and she shook her head at him. “Sorry. Not a big fan of chatting outside a bathroom.” She moved to the side again to show she wanted to walk around him, but he didn’t budge, and if she wanted to get past, she’d have to get physical - something she was desperately hoping to avoid.

But Bert didn’t seem to like her smart alec answer, and his eyes got colder by a degree. “Well, we don’t have to stay here, beautiful. Let me buy you a drink, and then,” he stepped closer to her and she gagged slightly at the cloud of body spray that surrounded him, “then let me take you back to my place, and show you the best night you ever had.”

Y/N wasn’t sure what direction to take - play along so maybe he’d move, and she could take off when they were out of the hallway, or just tell him to go fuck himself. If she played along she ran the risk of making him really pissed when she took off after, but she also ran the risk of pissing him off immediately if she just told him to get lost. 

Rather spontaneously, she simply decided she had no patience left in her for this asshole. 

“Absolutely not.” She told him firmly. “I have no interest in your offer. Now, please get out of my way and let me out of this hallway.”

As though she hadn’t even spoken, he moved closer, pushing her back a step. “You’re gonna love it baby, I promise.”

Y/N felt her stomach clench in fear and was just getting ready to stomp on his toes, or knee him in the nuts, or both, when she heard a familiar voice speak from behind Bert.

“Stop crowding the lady, asshole, and let her pass.”

Y/N felt relief flow through her as she looked down the hallway and saw Jensen standing just inside the entrance. 

Bert looked over his shoulder and lifted his chin in a dismissive gesture towards Jensen. “Nobody’s talkin’ to you, jackass. Just keep movin’.”

Jensen shook his head even though Bert was back to ogling Y/N, and wasn’t looking. “That’s not gonna happen. I’m only gonna warn you once.” He walked down the hall towards them. “Give it up, walk away, and your nose can stay unbroken.” Jensen issued the warning in a conversational tone. 

Finally Bert turned around to face him properly. Jensen’s size seemed to make him hesitate for a moment. Jensen had a good three or four inches on him, as well as about thirty pounds of muscle. But Bert's bravado and ego got the better of him.

“Bring it on, fucker, I’ve dealt with guys like you before. Think you’re Mr. Hotshot, but your nothin’ special. I could take you in my sleep.”

Jensen stared at him, two dimples showing up just above his top lip as he scowled, annoyance etched into his features as though Bert was a particularly bothersome fly he couldn’t swat. He shook his head and reached past him, holding his hand out for Y/N to take. “Come on, sweetheart.”

Y/N reached for him instantly, but Bert made the very huge mistake of slapping her hand away from Jensen’s. Y/N gasped, more from shock than pain, but she was looking at Jensen and saw his expression turn from annoyed to enraged. In the blink of an eye, his right fist came up to slam into Bert's face; a sickening crack sounded as his nose shattered and he fell to the floor.

Jensen reached over Bert’s prone figure and offered his hand to Y/N once again. She took it and he helped her step over the loudly moaning man. They walked away and were just barely out of the hallway, when they heard Bert rising up and bellowing in fury. They turned around in time to see Bert whipping down the hallway towards where they were now standing in the back part of the bar.

Jensen had just enough time to push Y/N out of the way before Bert was tackling him into an empty table and chairs. The two men crashed through it, splintering the wood and falling into the debris. Bert got in one good punch before Jensen rolled him over and began pummeling his face and body. Half a dozen punches later, the bouncers showed up to pull them apart.

There was a lot of confusion and yelling, and Y/N just stood with her hands over her mouth, stunned speechless. Soon, all their friends were in the back with them trying to make sense of what had happened. Thankfully, they sorted it out pretty quickly. One of the bartenders had seen Bert tackle Jensen, so the smaller man was just tossed out of the bar with a warning not to come back, or police would be involved. 

Eventually their friends began to filter back to the table, and the staff back to their jobs. But Tara stayed, cooing over Jensen’s purpling cheek and split bottom lip, coaxing him to come back to her hotel room so she could fix him up.

Y/N felt her stomach turn and her exhausted brain decided that she’d taken all she possibly could for one evening. She smiled at Jensen as he stood beside Tara while she ran her hands over his knuckles and tutted at their scrapes.

“Thank you.” She said simply. Her extreme gratitude for his rescue couldn’t really be summed up with two simple words, but that was all she could get out without bursting into tears. 

“Course.” Jensen said stiffly. He looked like he had more to say, but Y/N just smiled again and ducked past them quickly, admitting to herself that she was definitely running away.

***

Hours later, Y/N was sitting slumped on her couch, still dressed in her little black dress, heels kicked off under her coffee table, and an almost empty glass of wine in her hand. It was her second one, and she was just beginning to feel the pleasant fuzziness at the edges of her consciousness, when she heard a sharp knock at her door. 

Looking at her phone, she saw it was past one in the morning, and no one had texted her to say they were coming over. She sat up, but didn't move to the door until the knock came again.

She snuck up to the door quietly and peered out of the peephole. She let out a fairly loud squeal of surprise when she saw Jensen on the other side. She saw him look up at the door and knew he'd heard her. With no other choice if she wanted to try and maintain her “just fine” facade when it came to him, she turned the deadbolt and opened the door.

There was a full ten seconds of awkward silence as they stood just staring at each other. It may have only been seconds but it felt endless. Finally Y/N broke it.

“Hey.”

Jensen nodded and gave a fleeting smile. “Hey.”

Another awkward silence. 

Then Jensen shook his head. “Sorry, I just…uh…you left pretty fast, and…and I just wanted to make sure you were good. You know, from the…just with everything.”

Y/N smiled back, her smile equally brief and unnatural. “Yeah, oh yeah.” She waved dismissively. “Yeah, he was mostly just a douche, you know.”

Jensen nodded, and a beat passed before Y/N frowned and asked, “How about you?” She pointed at his split lip and bruised cheek. “How bad is it?”

He lightly brushed his forefinger against his lip, rubbing the cut there, and then shrugged. “Yeah, it’s nothing. Guy punched like a…well, like a douchebag, I guess.” He smiled again and it was slightly closer to his real smile.

Y/N nodded and was desperately trying to figure out her next move when Jensen pointed around her into her apartment. “Uh, do you mind…can I…?”

Y/N panicked slightly at the idea of letting Jensen in, but she moved back and ushered him inside “Yeah, sure.” He closed the door behind him, and now they stood awkwardly inside her apartment instead of outside. Desperate to break the torturous silence, Y/N pointed toward her kitchen. 

“Can I get you a drink, or something?”

But Jensen just shook his head. “N’ah, I’m good.”

So Y/N’s escape plan into the kitchen was thwarted. After a moment Jensen waved his hand around to indicate her apartment. “This is…new…nice.”

Y/N nodded, starting to feel like a bobblehead doll. “Yeah, I like it.” She frowned as a thought occurred to her. “How did you know where to find me?”

Jensen looked slightly guilty. “I bugged Briana til she told me.”

“Ah.” Y/N said. “That would do it.”

A spasm of a smile crossed Jensen’s face and then he opened his mouth and started to say something, but then quickly closed it. He looked a little wildly around the room as though he might find the words he sought, written on the walls.

Finally, he exhaled loudly and spun around towards the door. “K, well, I’m glad you’re good.” He said with another careless smile thrown back over his shoulder. “See ya.”

And just like that, he was gone again. 

Y/N stood in the middle of her living room, completely at sea. “What the hell was that?” She whispered out loud to herself.

She stood in the same spot for almost five minutes trying to puzzle it out, before another sharp, loud knock came to the door. Without looking through the peephole this time, she just pulled the door open and wasn’t the least surprised this time to see Jensen standing on the other side.

Bewildered, yes. Surprised, no.

“Jensen,” she said with a confused shake of her head, “what on earth ar-”

She gasped as he cut her off by grabbing the back of her head in his big hand and pulling her into his embrace. His mouth crashed down on hers, the kiss desperate and slightly brutal. Y/N moaned deeply as he thrust his tongue past her lips to ravage her mouth, moving his two hands so that they gripped her cheeks and held her in place as he pillaged her tongue, sucking it into his mouth, and licking deeply into hers.

He shifted his lips on hers, and Y/N took the moment to try and come to her senses. She pushed at his forearms and wrenched her head away from him. 

“What…” Her voice was completely breathless and high-pitched. She tried to lower it. “What the hell are you doing?”

She tried to step away from him, but he grabbed hold of her upper arms and held her there. “Please, Y/N, I just…fuck I miss you.”

Y/N shivered at the dark desire in his mossy green eyes and deep, rough voice, but she shook her head. “Jensen…we can’t just…” She floundered for words, trying desperately to remain sensible. This was madness!

“I know.” Jensen said, dropping his forehead to hers. “I know, and I know I’m an asshole for coming here, but…”

Y/N could see, close up, his jaw clenching and the muscle twitching there, and it made her lower belly clench. 

“But,” Jensen continued, “when I saw you there tonight, in this sexy little black dress…jesus fuck.” He moved his hands from her arms to grip her waist, bunching up the soft, clingy material of her dress in his big fists. “All I wanted to do was rip it off you.”

Y/N was breathing heavily, as though she’d run a mile. A whine entered her voice, as she tried to plead with herself more than him. “We can’t do this…it’s not…” His lips just grazed hers, and his soft, minty breath drifted across them. 

“Tell me to go.” He whispered roughly. “Say the word - I’ll go.” 

They stayed frozen together like that for quite a few rapid heartbeats before Y/N finally shook her head, conceding defeat, and acknowledging she never had any hope of victory.

“No. Don’t.” She bit her lip and then looked deeply into his eyes for the first time in a long time. “Don’t go.”

Jensen slammed the door shut with his foot, and only then did Y/N realize it was still open. Jensen had been her only focus since he’d charged through it. He grabbed her head in his hands again and kissed her deeply, still rough and desperate. He walked her backwards until they hit her bookshelves, knocking down a few paperbacks. 

Jensen pulled away from her mouth only to dip his head beneath her jaw. He nibbled at the extremely soft skin there, before running his tongue down her neck and across her shoulder, pulling the straps of her dress out of his way so he could bare her shoulder and suck bruises and leave teeth marks across her skin.

Y/N desperately shoved his black button up off of his shoulders and yanked his t-shirt over his head. Her hands were trembling, and it felt as though her entire body was shaking in anticipation. When she finally got her hands on his bare skin, she rubbed them down over his ribcage, and then up under his arms and around to his back. She dug her nails into the taut muscles there and Jensen growled out a moan. 

Suddenly he pulled back from her and spun her around. She grabbed hold of the shelves in front of her as she felt Jensen’s hands grip the top of her dress. Without even attempting the zipper, he ripped it apart with a grunt, tearing the dress in half. 

Y/N wanted to protest him ruining her dress, but she lost all coherent thought as he reached over her shoulder and shoved his hand down the front of her dress. His nimble fingers freed the front clasp of her bra quickly, and he wrapped his massive hand around her breast, squeezing her almost too hard. He rolled her nipple between his thumb and forefinger, and the puckered bud began to ache for more.

His mouth didn’t leave her body as he pressed her against the shelves. He trailed his lips down her neck and then down her back, pushing the two sides of her dress off of her completely. He pulled her bra off too, and tossed it aside. Left in only her black, silky thong, she heard Jensen moan deeply and then felt him step back from her slightly.

When she looked over her shoulder, she felt her slick begin to drip down her thighs at the look of ravenous need on Jensen’s face. She could see the way he bulged out his black jeans and she couldn’t restrain a whimper.

She turned towards him and then fell to her knees. She reached for his zipper, but Jensen grabbed her hands. 

“No baby, I can’t. You touch me right now and I’m gonna explode.” He pulled her back to standing and then grabbed the backs of her thighs, lifting her so she could wrap her legs around his hips. “And I need to fuck you, need to sink so deep into you.”

He spoke deliciously into her ear as he carried her down her only hallway towards what he must have correctly assumed was her bedroom. He kissed her as he carried her to the bed. Then he leaned down to place her gently on the mattress. She let go of him long enough for him to shuck his jeans and underwear, her mouth watering at the delicious sight of his leaking, red-tipped cock. 

Fuck he was beautiful. 

He crawled onto the bed and then between her legs. She tried to wrap her legs around him again, but he easily pushed them open. He stared down at her pussy and his tongue darted out to lick his lips. 

“Missed this pretty little pussy so much.” Jensen said as he laid his palm over her mound, fingers pointing towards her belly button, and then dipped his wide thumb into her folds to find her clit. The rough pad of his thumb circled it and soon had Y/N writhing, her hips bucking. Then he twisted his hand so that his thumb kept swirling around the hard little nub, but now his fingers could slide through her slick and then thrust deep and hard into her quivering body. 

Y/N screamed as he pressed against her g-spot making her come instantly. Her body shook as he continued to fuck her slowly with his fingers before sinking onto his stomach and letting his tongue take over. He flicked it back and forth against her and made her nearly convulse with pleasure. She came again, on his tongue, gripping his long hair, and using it to keep his mouth pressed against her. 

But he had no intention of moving any time soon, and kept her coming over and over. “Missed those sounds.” He said as Y/N shuddered and groaned and whimpered. “Say my name, darlin', I missed that too.”

Y/N grunted and then groaned as he slammed his three fingers into her particularly deep. “Fuck Jensen, oh fuck! Yes!” 

He smiled against her dripping pussy and pressed his fingers against her g-spot again, ripping another blistering orgasm out of her. “Perfect.” He praised.

Her throat was raw from crying out her pleasure before Jensen finally moved up her body to lay over top of her. He pushed her messy hair away from her forehead and kissed her, featherlight, across her cheeks. He smiled softly at her now, as she looked up at him, her expression thoroughly blissed out and her eyes hazy. 

“Missed your face like this. So beautiful, so completely open.” After a moment of watching Jensen watch her, Y/N’s mind cleared enough to register that his brow was crinkled in what looked like worry or fear. But before she could wonder about it for too long, he leaned down to press his lips ever so gently against hers. 

As he kissed her, he easily slid his thick cock into her body. She clenched around him and he buried his face in her neck as he spoke, muffled, against her skin. 

“And ungh, fuck! I missed this feeling. So tight and warm, so…so fucking perfect. Like…” He pulled out and slid back into her, moving incredibly slowly, savoring every inch. “Feels like - ungh!” 

He growled as her cunt squeezed around him again, and he lost all ability to speak, becoming wild and a little brutal as he rutted into her, ramming harshly into her tight, wet, heat over and over, until he was lifting her of the bed with every thrust and Y/N was screaming and clawing his back, shoving her heels into his ass, pushing him deeper still. Finally, he exploded with a shout through gritted teeth, and as she climaxed one more time, she felt the familiar, warm feeling of his cum shooting deep inside her and filling her up. 

They laid together, panting, for a long time. Everything felt surreal as Y/N began to float back to earth. It felt like she was in a very vivid dream. Eventually, Jensen rolled off of her and she moved onto her side so she could look at him. She opened her mouth to say something, to try and make sense of what had just happened between them, but Jensen put a finger to her lips and shook his head.

“Please, baby,” he said, exhaustion lacing his voice, “tomorrow, okay?”

He opened his arms, inviting Y/N to move into his embrace, and she did. She snuggled against him and pushed the questions out of her mind. Tomorrow would be soon enough to tackle some answers.

Yeah, tomorrow, she thought as she drifted off.

But when she woke in the morning, Jensen was gone. 

No note, no text, no explanation. If it wasn’t for the bruises and bites he’d left on her skin, she might have thought he was just a dream in the night, just a figment of her imagination. But he'd been there, and now he was just gone, taking all of her answers and another slice of her heart along with him.

Part 2

1 - Jensen RPF + Any/All characters Jensen plays. @lyarr24 @deans-spinster-witch @impalaslytherin @maggiegirl17 @akshi8278 @candy-coated-misery0731 @deanswaywardgirl @slytherinlyn314 @globetrotter28 @jensensgirl @perpetualabsurdity @tristanrosspada-ackles @djs8891 @muhahaha303 @kayyay1219 @emily-winchester @recoveringpastaaddict @maximumkillshot @mimaria420 @sacriceria @envyaurora95 @lacilou @jc-winchester @spnwoman @mimi-luvzyu @jackles010378

3 - Any/All Fics (regardless of fandom/character.) @kazsrm67 @sexyvixen7 @alexxavicry @nancymcl @spalady26

4 - Everything (includes fan vid/DOOL edits as well) @unabashed-lover-of-fictional-men @maliburenee @supernatural4life2022 @spn730015 @kickingitwithkirk @waywardbaby @foxyjwls007 @deanwanddamons @deandreamernp @deanwithscissors @myloversgone @snowlovespie @leigh70 @all-alone-he-turns-to-stone @charred-angelwings @hopefuldreamers-world @jensensgotyoudean @thoughts-and-funnies @magssteenkamp @princessmisery666 @eevvvaa @mishkatelwarriorgoddess @waynes-multiverse @mrsjenniferwinchester @bernasaurus @jensenslady79 @courtn92 @avanatural @ellie-andthemachine @this-is-me19 @roseblue373 @katbratsupernaturalwhore @fanfic-n-tabulous @k-slla

[edupiii]

*slams head into marble counter top, causing cups to fall onto the floor with the sheer amount of force*

I HAD A THOUGHT. POSSIBLY EVEN A THEORY.

or im just late as hell to the party

Spoiler Warning for Episode 7 of Murder Drones Below

ALRIGHT! Now I KNOW this shit is going to sound kinda crazy but STICK WITH ME HERE PLEASE-

I was just wondering around YouTube and I got this video made by @sutekh94 (sorry if you didn’t wanna be pinged Sutekh, if you’d like i can take the @ out) suggested to me. I watched it cause I like to see what other people say about the cringy media I consume rapidly.

At one point in the video, Sutekh is talking about the end shot of Uzi being in sppaaaaace saying that she was “shot into Copper-9s orbit”. I paused the video and looked at the clip on screen which was this BEAUTIFUL scene. Absolutely stunning.

Now at the end of the new episode I had a brain thought that this could be an outside shot of Copper-9, but then I found that too odd. However, seeing someone else say it has me looking into stuff. So I went through all the times we’ve seen Copper-9 within the series and found that yes, this very much is Copper-9 and Uzi stuck on its orbit:

highlighted circle is of the Little Rock’s orbiting Copper-9 that bump into Uzi

We can see the rock orbits, the space between Copper-9 and the (possible) moons it has. The Saturn moon being close up in the first angle we see from the first episode, but it being far away in the newest episode. This shows the distance and that despite being seen as farther away now, the Saturn moon is still the one we see so commonly in MD during the night.

But I was confused why it was like this? Why would it lead to the planets orbit? I understand the planet has a massive hole in it, but still it seemed like an odd occurrence.

Now- this is where I start sounding like I should never be let outside in public spaces-

Before we see this final scene of Uzi in spaaaacee, we watch The Solver/Fleshaa/Cyn go down that exact same hole saying: “honestly, I’m starving.”

It also references eating earlier on in the episode when talking to N: “Let’s eat.”

The Solver/Fleshaa/Cyn came to Copper-9 to initially get rid of other solver users that it knew of (Uzi and Doll), as well as find the cross with the patched code in it. First it destroyed all possible evidence involving the solver and the patch (scene where it explodes the computers and lockers in episode 7).

Secondly, it goes after Doll. Doll was against the Solver because she refused for it to use her to “eat the planet”, to which Flesha says, “not sure it needs you buddy”, then killing her.

Next it went for Uzi. It was originally going to kill Uzi acting as Tessa, however when N decapitated her that was no longer an option. Instead, it shifted into using Uzis body. At this point, she also has acquired the cross thanks to N. It goes ahead and destroys that too, checking another box off the list.

The Solver then went to kill N but was stopped by Nori, causing there to be a new target added to its hit list. In the fight with Nori and N, the Solver shows little respect for Uzis body. On multiple occasions it try’s to get Uzi killed. It knew N would try to stop this from happening, but even if he didn’t save Uzi, that would still be a win for the Solver.

It then try’s to eat Nori, wanting to get rid of her as quickly as possible since she poses the most threat to its plan. It’s interpreted by N and then loses control over Uzi. However, Uzi then proceeded to PUNT her mom down the flesh hole, resulting in Nori to be checked off the hit list as well since she would be assumed to be dead.

With Nori, Doll and the cross/patch gone and Uzi no longer under its control, the Solver retreats back into its Flesha form, surprise attacking N and Uzi. I would assume that the Solver doesn’t perceive either of these traumatized goobers to be a threat, seeing as it try’s to kill the pair but ultimately fails.

With all other players out of the field, The Solver no longer has anyone it deems as a threat. Dropping down the hole in victory and into Copper-9s orbit.

The Solver as we have seen eats oil, drone cores and human flesh and blood. With all human life (possibly) being wiped out entirely by being eaten, the Solver is starving. The next best option: drones.

Copper-9s current residents are only drones. Specifically worker drones who have no weaponry or Solver powers. The drones have governance over themselves (aka, sentient), so the Solver can’t just brainwash or order them into being eaten. So it plans to do it in one big final swoop.

It has been said on multiple occasions throughout the show: eating the planet, eating worlds, etc. but i (personally) never thought of that being an actual possibility. With the Solver/Flesha/Cyn in the orbit of Copper-9 and all possible obstacles taken care of, it is free to gorge itself on the drone inhabited planet, finally satisfying its endless hunger.

I would think it would do this by creating a NULL void, as the endless void/black hole can be acquainted with the idea of a always starving being. Something that can never be full. Never satisfied. We see this with earth and the core of Copper-9. We can also see this in the other times we have seen the NULL void appearing: a flash back in episode 4, killing the Sentinels in episode 6, it being in the sky in episode 7 during the murder drone apocalypse and probably a bunch of other times I didn’t write down.

The Solver didn’t get to fully eat Copper-9 all those decades ago, but now it’s come to finish its meal.

If this has already been a known thing and im joining in late, i profusely apologize for wasting both your time and my own.

As for a motive for The Solver doing this: to eat. It isn’t fighting for the freedom of drone kind or fighting against humanity because of the way they treated the AI they created, but rather uses drones as vessels and a food source. Often, Eldritch beings have little reason to care for anything. They do what they please and it’s horrifying because there is absolutely no way to deter this force or even try to talk it down. It’s above emotion and morality. It is all that matters and those beneath are seen as nothing but insignificant animals to yield to its power. It doesn’t want to dominate or rule a universe, it just wants to consume it.

[celaenaeiln]

It’s funny at one post you mention Robin!Dick being possibly the scariest one of them when you consider that

1) Jason literally once used a firearm to fend off some goons covering Batman

2) Tim literally has a mini Batmobile he can control with an RC radio called The Redbird

3) While Tim had a bo staff, all Dick really hand at most were two sticks plus he was the one wearing green pixie boots

Not saying Robin!Dick was in any way outclassed by the latter two but it’s funny he got that rep around Gotham’s underground as a small child

Original post in reference

Yes!!

Like Jason had used a gun and almost used the sharp end of a Batarang and Tim had a whole robotic machine at his disposal, but it's absolutely hilarious that Dick terrorized the town in little green gloves and short-shorts!

His original entrance didn't even have a weapon, his weapon was being a full on psycho!

Batman (1940) Issue #1

Guerrilla warfare at its peak. I can literally hear that "boing" through the comic panel.

This kid was a nightmare for villains - post

Later he used a sling shot of all things

Detective Comics Issue #38

LOOK AT THE WICKED GRIN ON HIS FACE!!

He's using a construction crane as a crime fighting device, no net below or anything!!

I firmly believe Dick terrorized the Gotham underworld for the sole fact that they couldn't come to terms with his insanity. When you look at some of the stuff Dick did as robin, even the Joker's madness starts making sense and then put that ball of craziness next to the gloomiest, most anti-criminal man in existence as his back up?

The criminals were right to be worried! They're fighting for their lives and he's fighting for fun!

That little blue glob there? under Dick's feet? that's a man screaming on his way down.

But Dick on the other hand?

[neverchecking]

Day 2: Tit Fucking- With Four

Okay, with everything going on, I know it's a little controversial for me to continue posting. HOWEVER, that being said I'm not letting them get to me.

It's been such a gift and an honor to watch how fast this community has banded together to come to not only mine, but Bailey's, defense too. So thank you. Thank you everyone. It means the world to me and I cannot describe how thankful I am.

That being said, I've delayed day 2 long enough.

Smut so Minors Do Not Interact. If I find out a minor has interacted with my blog, I will block you.. Thank you!

Smut CW: Tit jobs, AFAB! Reader, its pretty much whats written on the tin.

This is Day Two of My Kinktober so be sure to come back and check out the other days! Friendly Reminder that all of my smut is tagged 'Cindersins' including this, but this will also be tagged as 'Cinder's happy halloween' along with the run of the mill smut tags.

Kinktober Masterlist <<< Day 1 >>> Day 3

“That’s my good girl.”

With his head rolling back, four let out a tight groan, chest flexing against his ribcage as his knuckles flex and curl around the roots of your hair in his grasp. Something primal and unprecedented for him rolling in his gut like an angry fire, comparable to the ones in the forge, making his back arch and thighs quiver. You just looked so, so pretty down there, tits held together with your hands as you kitten licked right where the first of several barbells pierced his shaft. The soft flesh of your breasts was warm and smooth and when slicked over with your spit, made for the perfect little show just for him. Watching you draw back and forth over his cock over and over again made the head weep with precum, which just served to make your gorgeous tits sheen even further. 

Your nipples had perked so prettily for him and he was almost tempted to pull at them, but you were enjoying yourself. So dickdrunk, you could barely tell up from down as you found yourself so busied by his cock, switching between sucking the head to toying with each piercing as you passed it before raising up only to rub your tits up and down the very trail your lips had. 

Goddess above, you were so pretty like that. On your knees before him, mind totally blank with the only thought of pleasing him. Oh, how he adored you for it. He was so totally infatuated with your golden divinity, so to have you praise him like he was the only God you knew of? 

Made his cock twitch from where you had been mindlessly suckling at the head, tongue swirling over the opening to readily collect any new beads of precum. 

“My precious jewel, you look like the Goddess incarnate even with your pretty little head so empty.” He crooned, hand leaving your hair to cup your cheek. It stalled you for a second, your gorgeous eyes looking up at him through your lashes, as if awaiting his next demand. And, oh, how we just love to pin you to the nearest wall and tease your velvet walls, dragging his piercings along them in the way he knew drove you absolutely crazy. To turn you from mindless and obedient to just simply breaking you in the best way he knew how, watching your pearly tears coat your cheeks as you babble away at him. He would ache for nothing more, but you had been so polite when you originally asked to do this. You had been so calm through his gentle insults and so well behaved when he had denied you what you wanted at first, teasing you like a dog with a bone. 

It would’ve been cruel to deny you this, even if the idea was so deliciously taunting.  

All that to say, the day was young and he had no orders to fill in the forge. So, he had all the time in the world to give you whatever you wanted. Even if it would come at a price. 

“Now, finish what you started and maybe I’ll return the favor, my jewel.”

[bottlesofrouge]

on one condition.

harry styles x original character

part one.

word count: 6.9K

warning: their home lives kind of suck but that's it! (i think)

1 JUNE 2018

in the month of june, the sun rises around 5:25 am every morning in new york. sometimes it rises a few minutes earlier, and sometimes it rises a few minutes later, but lynn knew as soon as the first ray peaked its way through the blinds, her mother would be fully dressed, standing in the kitchen, and tapping her way through work emails that had mysteriously piled up overnight. growing up, lynn found this routine comforting because it never changed, weekends and holidays included. if she woke up and it was light outside, she knew her mom would be standing behind the breakfast bar with a stack of blueberry pancakes (made by her very wonderful au pair, elena) planted in front of her. she would sit on the stool across from her, and talk her mom's ear off. little lynn thought her mom's lack of responses was due to the fact that she was so tired from waking up so early every morning, but now-lynn realizes she just didn't really care that much.

her fingertips brush across the back of the stool sitting next to her, and it's almost like she can see a seven-year-old lynn sitting next to her. the slight glow of the numbers on the oven clock illuminating her features as she tells her mom about her chorus concert that was taking place in the evening. her grin widens as kathleen tells her she'll be there after she finishes work. although, elena will be the only familiar face she sees in the audience, and now-lynn knows it will always be like this. elena's familiar face amongst the crowd with her mother nowhere in sight.

the oven clock reads 5:13 am, and lynn decides to go over to the kitchen sink to splash some water on her face, trying to wash away any indication that might suggest she had not moved from the stool since she sat down nearly five hours prior. because that would be crazy, but also entirely true.

"you're up early," her mom's voice flows from the bottom of the staircase as soon as the first ray bounces off the granite kitchen counter, illuminating the room a bit more with its glow.

"i am," she reaches for the stool that she just got up from as her mom places a fresh cup of coffee in front of her.

kathleen says nothing else. instead, she reaches for her macbook that has been charging on the counter overnight, and lynn assumes she's immediately opening outlook. that's how it usually went the mornings after she'd spent the night. she'd stare at the wall for a few hours, trying not to let the sounds of her mother slamming the keys of the keyboard annoy her too much.

honestly, lynn didn't know what her mom did for work. she tried to explain it to her on a few occasions, but the only thing she understood was that it was extremely time-consuming. kathleen once said she was the only one in her office that had children, and she thought that maybe her mom should've followed in their footsteps.

"you'll be ready by 11, right? and you'll help me make sure the girls are ready?" kathleen says. she doesn't look at lynn until a few moments pass with no response. they make eye contact and her mom raises her brow. "the barbecue, lynn. remember?"

"right. i've got it. don't worry."

"your coffee's getting cold," her mom points out.

lynn tips the mug around before taking a sip. it's definitely cold, but she denies it and takes another sip before telling her mom she's wrong. there's really no reason to. it's only a cup of coffee, but she thinks she'll do just about anything to spite her.

her dad walks in and the entire atmosphere changes. he kisses kathleen's forehead and lynn can't help but cringe inside. it's absolutely sickening and she can't understand why her mom would ever take someone like him back. she had said lynn would understand when she was older, but it's been fifteen years and she still can't wrap her mind around it.

"good morning," he says as he pours himself a cup of coffee. "are the girls up?"

tuning out whatever her garbage father has to say is the only gift that lynn is thankful for. as soon as he opens his mouth, her ears magically turn off. it's something she'll be eternally grateful for because she thinks hearing peter's voice for more than four seconds would send her into a spiral.

growing up without a dad was a lot less horrific than some people may think. lynn didn't feel like she was missing out, and she didn't think her life was doomed to be a failure because of his absence. she honestly never thought much of her dad. that all changed when she was eleven though, and she walked in the door from school to see her parents moving all of her dad's belongings back into the same house he had moved out of eleven years prior (after having an affair with her first au pair before she had even turned one). needless to say, the sight of peter's face is enough to make now-lynn physically ill.

"are you going to be in such a sour mood all day, lynn?" she rolls her eyes at the words and makes no move to respond. it's silent once again, and the only sound that can be heard is kathleen's occasionally slurping.

it's nearing ten when her sisters finally wake up. jane is the first one down the steps. she's got the blanket she's had since she was born clenched in her fist as her other hand is holding the railing to make sure she doesn't tumble down the staircase. the little girl wordlessly makes her way to the kitchen, where she finds lynn making her blueberry pancakes covered in maple syrup.

"lynn," she yawns, fist rubbing her eyes. "you're back already?"

"m'only here for the barbecue mom insisted i go to."

"aw, man," the girl stabs a piece of her pancake and rests her head in her hand, a sigh pushing past her lips.

"i know. i miss you, too, jane." her fingers brush the other's hair away from her face as she eats. "i'll visit you a lot, and you know you and amelia are always invited over. all you have to do is ask."

jane only hums in response to her sister and puts all of her energy back to eating her pancakes. it's not long until amelia comes down the stairs. she looks almost as disheveled as their youngest sister. her hair is in a messy knot on top of her head, and she's still sporting last night's pajamas. lynn can't help but wonder where her mom went off to, and she feels a little queasy when amelia says she already knew lynn was visiting. simply because the kitchen smelled of food.

she makes sure jane's hair and teeth are brushed before finding her a little summer dress that screamed neighborhood barbecue, and then she braids amelia's hair away from her face before getting herself ready. there were only ten minutes before they had to leave, so lynn opts for a pink two-piece set she ordered from a random website online that probably specializes in drop shipping, and retouches her leftover makeup from yesterday before joining the two girls in the living room where they were watching some new disney movie that jane probably asked to be put on. it would be an understatement to say she was tired. her eyes felt heavy and she could barely hold her head up. she thinks that if she fell asleep now she could get out of this whole thing, but kathleen comes walking down the staircase, crushing her dreams of an afternoon nap.

"really lynn? that's what you're wearing?" and the girl should be upset at her mother's words. she really should, but after spending twenty-seven years hearing them, she's gotten used to them. "there's someone there i want you to meet."

lynn rolls her eyes as she walks to the foyer, "i'm not the next contestant on the bachelorette," she slips her shoe on. "and i'm definitely not dressing up for one of your friend's sons."

surprisingly, her mom drops it. lynn would be lying if she had said that she didn't find it the slightest bit alarming. her mom would've spent the entire two-minute-long drive trying to sell her on this mystery boy, but instead she reminds the girls that dance camp starts on monday... and then she asks lynn to take them.

when lynn gets out of the car, she can only focus on one thing, and that was how hot it was outside. it wasn't just a little uncomfortable. no, it was absolutely sweat-running-down-your-back roasting. she decides on pulling her hair up off of her neck which earns another comment from her mother. honestly, she tuned this one out, but she thinks she said something about lynn's masculine features becoming more prominent when her hair was tied back.

it's not long before kathleen starts introducing the girls to all of her friends. a woman asks if jane and amelia were her grandkids, and when her mom says no, she said that she couldn't believe how similar the girls looked to their nanny while nodding over at lynn.

there was honestly nothing she found more repulsing than this damn neighborhood barbecue. she hated it when she was seven, and she hates it now, twenty years later. it was hot and the air felt thick and humid. all she wanted was a nice long nap. she could picture it now. fresh, crisp, cool sheets and-

"lynn adams," kathleen's snapping her fingers in front of the girl's face, and it takes everything in her not to swat her mom's hand away. "don't be rude. this is my friend from yoga, marianne. she has a son-" and she doesn't know what else her mother says because as soon as the words leave her mouth, kathleen's voice sounds something similar to the bland tones of the parents in any charlie brown special, and before she knows it, marianne from yoga is hugging her and leading her towards a boy who looks like a young, unshowered, mick jagger cosplayer.

✮✮✮

harry's parents invited him over for lunch, and he really couldn't say no. he missed his mom's home-cooked meals, and honestly, he really never cooks actual meals for himself. he's found that cheap vodka and whatever mixer he could find in his cabinets worked as a great substitute. he'd never admit it, but he was excited to see his parents. sure, he lives only twenty minutes away, but he doesn't really ever have time to make a visit. failing all of his classes and frequenting the town's bar really took all of his energy.

when harry gets to his parents, he sees his sister's car in the driveway, and he thinks it's going to be a nice little family meal, something he hasn't had since he started going to college. but it's not. and really, he should've known better. no one wants to be around him.

when he stepped inside, his family and family friends were waiting for him in the living room. they sat in a circle and they all held folded pieces of paper in their hands. it took them a minute to realize that they were hosting their own intervention.

the entire event was so uncomfortable, and it made harry hate himself more than he already had. he knew he had a problem, and he also knew that he could stop whenever he wanted to. he did, in fact. he only started drinking again because he was craving validation. it doesn't really make sense to anyone but him, but he found it was easier to get someone to go home with him after he had been drinking. it gave him the confidence he needed, simple as that.

when his mom started reading her note, she was sobbing, and it made harry cry, too. it wasn't because what she was saying moved something deep inside of him. it was because he couldn't understand why they felt the need to embarrass him in front of so many people he wasn't really comfortable with. a phone call asking harry if he was okay would've worked just as well, but they never called unless it was to tell him just how disappointed they were in him.

so now he was at this stupid event for a neighborhood he hasn't lived in since he turned 18. his mom had asked him to come, and he felt like he couldn't say no. he was scared he'd push her into holding a second intervention, and honestly, he didn't think he'd be able to handle that.

it was hot and noisy, and there were kids everywhere. harry hated kids. they were gross and dirty, and they always found a way to piss him off. they were part of the reason that harry was so big on safe sex. he would literally have to change his name and move continents if he were to get anyone pregnant.

he's sitting at one of the picnic tables alone. his dad was lucky enough to skip the whole thing, and gemma claimed she was busy. his mom didn't mind though, and harry couldn't help but wonder why she was so adamant about him going. originally, he had thought that maybe she had wanted to spend some quality time with him, but nearly an hour had passed and marianne was still talking to her book club mom friends, not really showing interest in introducing them to her son. harry wasn't too surprised, though. his mom never really introduced him to her friends anymore.

marianne loves him. harry knows that. she only ever wants what's best for him, but she always goes about it the wrong way. maybe some kids needed an hour-long phone call lecture about how they'll never amount to anything if they don't finish their degrees. his sister was one of those kids. he remembers sitting at the kitchen table while his mom scolded her on the phone, and her dad did in person. john had driven the six hours to gemma's college town to bail her out of the county jail after a crazy night during her freshman year. needless to say, after that phone call, it never happened again. what his parents failed to realize was that harry wasn't gemma, and maybe he just needed someone to hold his hand and tell him everything would be okay.

he notices marianne moving away from her book club group and towards a family. there was an older couple, a girl that looked about his age, and two younger children. harry couldn't help but wonder what that family dynamic was. perhaps she was the girls' nanny, or maybe she was even a third in the parents' relationship. if it was the latter, it would definitely be a little harder to get her to sleep with him, but he always liked a good challenge.

"harry," his mom pulls him from his thoughts. he blinks and suddenly his mom and the nanny (slash possible unicorn) were standing in front of him at the other side of the table. "this is lynn, kathleen's daughter."

"who's kathleen?" he takes a drink from his cup (which held nothing but ice cubes and water) before wiping the wetness off of his mouth with the back of his hand.

marianne's face turns red, "kathleen from yoga." she says it slowly like it should ring a bell, but harry's not too familiar with the attendees of the 'Yoga Over 40' class. "kathleen and i thought you guys should talk. maybe get to know each other today," and before harry can open his mouth to say no thank you, marianne is pulling a chair out for the girl and then walks away.

"i'm lynn," she says like marianne didn't introduce her thirty seconds ago. she holds out her hand, but harry's already in a foul mood and he senses lynn (he thinks that is a terrible name) would be an easy target to humiliate.

so instead of shaking her hand like a decent human being, he looks at her over the top of his sunglasses and pops the spearmint gum he's been chewing since he got here. "not interested."

"don't flatter yourself," she rolls her eyes and leans forward, resting her forehead on the palms of her hands before crossing her arms in front of her.

"so you're telling me you weren't just begging my mom to introduce us?" his eyebrow quirks and he has a small smile forming on his lips. "'cause it looked an awful lot like that."

she smiles at him, white teeth and all, "trust me when i say i would rather act as a speed bump at the entrance of this neighborhood, waiting to be taken out of my misery by an unsuspecting hybrid toyota prius."

"weirdly specific," he takes another drink. "is that some sort of kink of yours?"

"maybe," her eyes bore into his. the look on her face is so bland, harry can't quite get a read on her. she looked the opposite of him. lynn had blonde hair and blue eyes. the only thing the two had in common was their curly hair, and so harry was obligated to think that it wasn't totally unattractive. "is yours watching mommy pick up girls at the neighborhood picnic for you?"

"ha. ha," harry's voice is emotionless. "tell me, lynn. have you ever considered going into comedy?"

"no, but i'm certain that everyone in the local comedy crowd would love my work. i'm thinking i could enter a piece titled 'desperate mom tries to pawn off loser son'. what do you think? i could credit you if you'd like." she smiles at him again, and he can tell by her eyes that her smile is fake. harry thinks if she were wearing sunglasses he might think she was trying to make a joke rather than a dig at him.

"kathleen thought we should talk," he reminds her. "i wouldn't be climbing on your high horse just yet."

the silence that followed hung around them like a cloud, and it was quite awkward. lynn didn't seem to mind though. she was off in her own world, daydreaming about god knows what. if harry were to take a guess, he'd bet that she was thinking of fairies and rainbows, or whatever else children under the age of eight think about during their free time.

"do you want to get out of here?" harry's popping the gum in his mouth again. "we could have sex. i will say you're not my usual type, but i can always appreciate a good body.

"gross," she leans back in her chair, her face showing disgust almost as if his words could contaminate her. "what's your usual type? wait let me guess," she taps her finger on her chin for a moment. "brown hair and pretty green eyes. i assume it's the closest thing you'll get to fulfilling the fantasy you have of fucking yourself."

"you think my eyes are pretty," he says, completely disregarding whatever else she said.

"i can appreciate nice eyes when i see them," she says. "don't fall in love with me yet."

lynn's wearing her hair pulled away from her face, and harry thinks it suits her. she has some sort of matching outfit on. it's shorts and a button-up top, made out of the same soft material. it's baby pink, like her lips, and she's dainty?? harry doesn't know if that's the right word, but she looks small and soft. like if she were in an arm wrestling competition with a fly, the fly would win. the tiniest smile, really it was barely a smile, makes its way to his face because... well, he thinks she's pretty.

"got something on my face?" she asks, and harry's waiting for a snide remark to follow, but she's serious. lynn has no idea that he just spent the last five minutes shamelessly checking her out. the fact that he was caught makes his cheeks burn a little, and harry shakes his head.

"you know, maybe we should get out of here after all," her fingertips brush over the back of his hand as she speaks.

"you want me to rock your world, huh blondie?"

she nods and sucks her bottom lip between her teeth. harry feels his whole body growing hot as she leans towards him again. "you wanna know what would really rock my world, harry?"

"hmm?" he hums, leaning forward to meet her in the middle of the table. honestly, this whole thing was wildly inappropriate for the high point hills annual family barbecue, but he didn't really care.

"you taking me back to yours," she leans even closer and harry can feel her words against his ear. "and letting me have the longest, most-mind blowing nap i've ever had."

"you're sick, lynn," he pulls away from her to see one of her fake smiles across her face. "but, i never leave a woman unsatisfied. let's go."

"really?"

"your prius wet dream sounds hotter with every second that passes here," he stretches his arms above his head when he stands up. "and not having to hear your voice is a huge plus."

"has anyone ever told you how charming you are, harry?" she accidentally bumps him with her hip as they walk towards his car together.

"your mom has multiple times actually. she tells me after every night we spend together," and he bumps her back, maybe a little too hard because she almost loses her balance when their hips collide.

12 JUNE 2018

throughout grade school, lynn could always count the number of friends she had on a singular hand at any given time. it wasn't that she was disliked or anything like that. she was just rather quiet and didn't feel the urge to talk to anyone unless she was being spoken to. her senior year friend group only took up four out of her five fingers, and it consisted of jacqueline, luke, silas, and violet. they met in their mathletes club at the beginning of her and silas's senior year. both luke and violet were juniors, and jackie was only a sophomore. the five of them parted ways, each going to a different college in various different states. luke ended up being the closest to her when she was in college, and even then he was four states away.

however, the distance didn't keep them apart. it was a tradition that they all met at least once a year, usually in their hometown. they would go out, maybe grab a drink, or go to the local bowling alley, but this year, jackie was in her final semester, taking the three condensed summer courses she needed to graduate when everyone was in town. having never skipped a year in nearly a decade, the five of them decided to have dinner on jackie's campus in between two of her night classes. that's how lynn found herself sitting around boxes and boxes of take out and drinking cheap wine out of hydroflask surrounded by her best friends.

"how's ren, silas?" jackie's voice pulls her back into the conversation. "i thought you'd bring them."

silas takes lynn's hydroflask from her hands, and swallows a huge gulp before clearing his throat. "i asked them to marry me," he hands the drink back to lynn. "and they said no. i guess they weren't really the marriage type."

"dude," luke shoves him. "why didn't you tell any of us?"

"it was something i needed to figure out on my own. i loved ren, you all know that, but i really want the whole thing. marriage, kids, all of it. in a way, i was the one who left them, but.. ren's engaged. i found out last night, and i don't really know how to feel about it."

"i'm sorry, si," lynn rests her head on her friend's shoulder. "you deserve better than that."

"when did you guys break up?" everyone turns to glare at violet, but silas offers her a smile.

"six months ago. i think it's a valid time frame, but we were together for four years so," he shrugs. "i don't want to think too far into it. as long as ren's happy.. that's what matters to me."

"why can't all men be like you?" jackie says. "when i broke up with chad, he stalked me for a week before sending me a $500 venmo request for wasting his time."

"his name's chad, jackie," luke laughs. "i'm not sure what you were expecting."

luke's eyes catch lynn's and he smiles at her so warmly she can't help but smile back. the two dated briefly when they were in college, keeping their romance strictly between them. but every time luke smiles at her like that, it reminds her of the many times she'd open her dorm door to find him sitting on her bed, grinning at her like... actually, there was really nothing to compare it to. she called it his sunshine smile because it was warm and bright, and it was all hers.

and then one day it wasn't. lynn remembers sitting at their yearly hangout, luke's new girlfriend glued to his side. clara yawned, he gave her that smile, and then took her home early. lynn wanted to rip that smile off his face and put it in her pocket to be hers to keep forever. and when luke showed up at her door the next morning asking if she was sure—if them not being together was really what she wanted. she said yes, and the dream of ever getting that sunshine smile back was crushed.

so now she settles for the close-lipped, warm smiles luke offers. she takes them in and tries so hard to lock them up in her memory. the way luke made her feel is something she never wants to forget, and she can't believe she threw it all away for some dick that lived across the hall.

sometimes when she can't sleep at night she thinks of luke's drunk phone call. he was a blubbering mess, but she managed to make out when he asked if lynn had cheated on him, and when lynn said 'no, but we should break up', he cried. she couldn't bring herself to hang up, so she sat there for nearly ten minutes listening to luke's heart break. she wonders if luke remembers that phone call, too.

his sunshine smiles are still reserved for clara (til death do them part), and the only other people he shares them with are their children, a toddler named thomas and a baby named ivy, and every time she sees them she can't help but wonder if they were supposed to be hers. it's not that she was still in love with luke or anything like that. she loved him in the most platonic way possible, but she deeply missed what they shared because it was good. he was good.

"earth to lynn," silas waving his hand in front of her face is what brings her back. "come back to us, darling."

"sorry, she sits up, no longer leaning on her friend. "i don't know where i went."

"are you still not sleeping?" violet's voice is so full of concern and it makes lynn's cold, grinch-like heart grow a few sizes.

"i sleep during the day," she stuffs a spoonful of the cake silas had brought. "it works. i'm okay."

"you know we love you," luke says. "you can always stay with clara and i."

"don't know if you'd want that. i'd probably steal ivy," she takes another bite. "god, she is one cute baby."

the group laughs, and lynn disappears in her own head for the next hour. she doesn't come back until jackie stands up, declaring she'll be late for her next lecture, and the rest of the group follows. luke leaves a few minutes later when clara sends a picture of ivy in her pajamas, and lynn thinks that she should never take him up on his offer because she would definitely make national news for kidnapping the girl. violet leaves with him because they parked next to each other, and she doesn't remember where that was exactly.

"thank you," silas says. "for not telling them about ren." lynn had known since the night of the doomed proposal. silas had called her from the comfort of his beaten-up honda civic and cried to her for hours.

she nodded, "of course. you asked me not to."

"yeah," he leans back on the blanket, and lynn follows him. the sun was just setting and she thought the sky was gorgeous. "i know." his voice breaks off, and she knows he's crying.

"silas?"

"hm?"

"did you know luke and i were together?"

"what?" he sits up, wide-eye staring at the girl.

"when?"

"a few years ago. when we were both in college."

"it was bad?"

"it was good," lynn says around a yawn. "so good, actually. sometimes i'm scared i won't have anything on that level again."

silas runs a hand through his hair, and furrows his brows. "what happened?"

"i left him for you know who," her hands grip his shoulders, forcing him to look at her. "and silas, please don't tell anyone this, but i regretted it for so long."

"you don't anymore?"

"no," she shakes her head and her hands fall to her lap. "seeing him with his family, silas. he's so happy, and that's worth every second of pain i caused. that's why i'm telling you this. if ren is really happy, it'll be worth it. i promise. it'll all feel okay."

silas pulls lynn into his chest, and she can feel his tears wetting her hair. "im so grateful for you, el. so incredibly grateful for you."

"you know i feel the same about you."

when he pulls away, he's looking at her with misty eyes and saying he needs to go catch his flight. they say their goodbyes and lynn even lets a tear of her own fall because he was the person she felt the closest to out of the entire group. they were the same age, and there was something a little trauma bonding about going to college alone, hundreds of miles away from home.

lynn lays back on the blanket, everything from their dinner still left behind. she's overly tired and feels like the world would explode if she had to move another inch. a quick nap under the stars is calling her name. her eyelids are growing heavy, and-

"i could steal your purse right now," the voice startles her awake. "it's sitting so far away from you and you seem to have quite the chunk of cash hanging out."

she turns her head to see harry sitting next to her and groans. "don't you have like, i don't know, a mick jagger cosplay convention to go to."

"i'll take that as a compliment, lynn." he looks down at her. "i was just making sure you weren't dead."

"how thoughtful," she sits up and leans back on her arms. "you should've just left me for the vultures, though. being picked apart by them sounds much more appealing than having a nice little chitchat with you."

"always flattering yourself, aren't you, blondie?" he gives her a lopsided smile. "couldn't have anyone finding your dead body on my campus after i took you home with me a week ago. it's too suspicious. plus, my mom doesn't really have the time to be making #freeharry posters and organizing rallies."

"i, in ghost form, would learn to speak to children just so i could tell my sisters you're guilty."

"that's who you were with at the barbecue?" he leans back on his arms to match lynn. "your sisters?"

"yeah," her finger pulls the collar of her shirt away from her neck. "i'd prefer not to talk about them right now."

"okay," he drops his head to the side, and he looks at her. it was so unfair that such pretty were wasted on someone like him.

"what? you don't have a list of questions ready to rapid fire at me? that seems unlike you."

"of course i do," he says. "but you said you didn't want to talk about it." eyes now narrowed, he licks his lips before finishing. "and you don't know me, lynn. not at all."

harry was right, and it made her feel a little guilty. when he took her home with her, the two didn't speak at all once they got to the car. the ride was quiet and she rested her head against the cool window and let her eyes fall shut. he showed her the guest room, and that was that. she immediately fell asleep, and when she did finally wake up, it was around midnight. harry was already sleeping, but he left her a note (which said he would take her home in the morning) and a plate of whatever he made for dinner (its important to note that harry made the entire meal free of the big 8 allergens) (because he didn't know if lynn had any food allergies). she ordered an uber instead, and miles drove her the whopping fifteen minutes to her parents' house in exchange for five stars and a three dollar tip.

"thank you," she offers him the slightest smile. really, it's so small harry would probably need a telescope to see the way the corners of her mouth were upturned. "for the other night."

"you're not the first girl to thank me for bringing them home," the words make lynn's eyes roll, and whatever guilt she felt in the very bottom of her stomach for judging harry is long gone. "im only pushing your buttons, blondie. lighten up," he nudges her with his shoulder and that is the tipping point for lynn.

"because women being sexualized by disgusting men is so funny, harry," she watches as his eyes grow wide. almost like he's shocked. like no one's ever told him differently.

"lynn, i didn't-"

she holds her hand up. "you should go."

and he does, not before giving her a pained look which only made her want to roll her eyes harder. lynn watches him leave and pretends not to notice the way his shoulders are slouched over more than they were the first time and the way he drags his feet like he's a thousand pounds heavier. her eyes focus back on the squirrel that's still running around the tree once he's out of sight. why were college campus squirrels always so large?

the next thing she knows, jackie is poking her side and pressing her palm against lynn's chest almost as if she was checking if her heart was still beating. a sigh falls from the girl's lips when she realizes that lynn is alive, and she can see a line in between the girls brows through her half closed eyelids. she notices jackie's chest heaving, almost like she was trying to steady her breathing. the heavy, hot ball of guilt finds it's way back into her stomach. she hates having her friends worry about her.

"sorry, jackie. i fell asleep," she yawns and reaches above her head to stretch out her back.

"are you okay, lynn?" jackie's staring at her with such intensity, she thinks this is probably what it feels like to be in an interrogation room after your life-long enemy mysteriously disappeared. "like genuinely, are you doing alright?"

"im tired," she offers her a big smile. "that's all. im fine."

jackie narrows her eyes and tilts her head skeptically, and lynn is doing her very best to not burst into tears because there's no reason for her to be crying. her friend's face softens, and she stands up, reaching her hand down to lynn.

"c'mon. let's clean up. you're staying the night at mine." lynn doesn't argue because she really does want to stay with her friend. it's been so long since she's slept at jackie's despite her only living an hour away from the girl's school. "and i usually take the bus, so you're driving."

lynn smiles at her as she helps pick up the dinner mess that the group had left, and she can't help but wonder how she was lucky eough to have such great friends. they've known each other for nearly a decade, and still care for each other the same way they did back in high school. she knows that if she were to tell jackie how she moved out months ago and still hasn't slept through the night at her own place, silas's flight would be missed and violet would drive the six hours back just to be with her.

deep down, lynn knows she can't sleep because of something a little bigger than an uncomfortable bed, but she chooses to ignore it because her therapist had said she was doing very well, or whatever that meant. it was like her doctor just marked her with a stamp, big red lettering reading 'HEALED' across her forehead, and that was supposed to make everything feel okay forever. her friends and family were so proud of this milestone, lynn didn't know if she would ever be able to tell them that maybe the big red stamp was wrong. and that was the thing, it didn't always feel wrong. only during those long sleepless nights and cloudy, rainy days.

she feels lied to, really. everyone said healing wasn't something that just happened overnight, and of course, she knew that. (who didn't know that?) they pushed this idea that lots of therapy and sometimes a few medications would help her get better. and that's the thing. she did feel better. with each hour spent on her therapist's couch came the slightest bit of feeling better.

what she didn't realize was that feeling better and feeling yourself again weren't mutually exclusive. she feels a thousand times better and yet she's never felt farther from who she used to be. honestly, that version of her might be dead, and that is something she never wants to face.

"i've lost you again, lynn," jackie's leaning over the center console to rest her head on her friend's shoulder. "that brain of yours must be pretty nice for you to be spending so much time in there."

"i just got the biggest feeling of deja vu," lynn brushes off her worries as she parks in the designated parking spot. "this is new, right? i haven't visited you here before?"

the two girls meet at the front of the car, lynn helping the other with her huge course textbooks that probably cost more than her rent.

"don't think so. luke and clara brought the babies to visit once, but i don't remember if you were there."

lynn shakes her head. it wasn't that she avoided luke and clara, but she tried to spend minimal time around them.

jackie lives on the fourth floor of her complex. each staircase has approximately thirty-two (she counted) stairs, and by the time they get to the top, lynn is completely out of breath. she leans on the wall outside of the girl's apartment door as she fumbles through her tote bag full of god knows what.

"i was in such a rush this morning," she gives her a sympathetic smile. "i just tossed my keys in here."

lynn holds back a groan as jackie piles whatever else she's holding on top of the stack of books in her hands and then kneels on the ground, dumping out the contents of her bag as she searches for her keys that look to be nowhere in sight. she hears an elevator ding and lynn wants to do nothing more than roughly shove her friend over with her foot because why did they walk all the way up ninety-six stairs when there was a perfectly functioning elevator mere feet away?

"why didn't we take the elevator, ja-"

the most obscene kissing sounds fall out of the elevator as soon as the door opens. it sounds like someone is slowly pulling one hundred suction cups painfully slow off of the walls in there and lynn wonders if it's some kind of swingers group because there's no way two people could be kissing that aggressively.

"found them," jackie stands up, brushes off her pants, and looks towards the elevator.

"m'neighbor... has someone over every night."

she's proven wrong when a girl walks out, her arms draped around a boy's neck. he's kissing her and walking her back so she's pressed against the wall, and lynn can't look away. not even when the two turn, and she realizes its harry. not even when harry's eyes catch her stare. and not even when the girl starts sucking on any exposed skin her mouth could reach (harry was still looking at lynn) (and she was still looking at him) (and his lips looked nearly bruised) (not that it matters).

jackie steps between them, and by the time she grabs all of her things, harry and the girl are in his apartment. she can't help the small laugh that escapes when she realizes the girl had brown hair and pretty green eyes.

✰✰✰✰

a/n: all of this is getting reposted because the format is driving me absolutely craaaazy :(

[hansumswife]

could you write a fluff about matt inspired by the song need your love so bad by fleetwood mac? thank you :3

ʟᴇᴀᴅ ᴍᴇ ᴛʜʀᴏᴜɢʜ ᴛʜᴇ ɴɪɢʜᴛ

matt sturniolo x reader

@st7rnioioss @its-jennarose @timmyscomputer @kriissy4gov @liz-stxrn @sunrisemill @mattssluttywaist @riasturns @mx0qin @junnniiieee07 @alorsxsturn @nonameisthegameandilovejake

Sitting at the bar of the jazz club you attended regularly, you opened your purse and picked your card out from the small slot. Swiping it on the card machine the bartender had held out to you, he smiled at you before wishing you a well night.

Placing your card back into its slot, along with the other belongings you had laid in front of you back into your purse, you stood up and began to exit the club. Slowly, the live music faded out behind you as you walked onto the dark, cobbled streets.

The streets were slightly wet due to the rain - which was originally the reason you entered the club. A sense of nostalgia running through your veins as you remembered your first night.

”Hey, doll! You think I could get your number?” the strong Boston accent asked. A small smirk graced his face as he looked down at you.

You were hooked, immediately. The way his eyes were that blue, so blue. The way his hair waved down and say perfectly. The way his face was covered in a light layer of stubble you wouldn’t notice unless you were this close to the man in front of you.

A silhouette stood under the street lamp, his facial outline causing a smile to take its familiar place on your face. “Are you my walk home?” you asked jokingly, the man lifting his head up to lock eyes with you.

A smile made its way to his face as well. “Of course doll.” Matt said, moving his hand to place his and in yours - titling it so your purse fell onto his wrist instead.

You shook your head teasingly at the mysterious man in front of you, to which he raised an eyebrow. “At least tell me your name first, handsome.”

He shook his head whilst chuckling under your breath, enticed by your games. “My names Matthew, what’s yours sweetheart?”

A swarm of butterflies flew through your stomach at the pet name, almost not answering due to being distracted by his features. His face illuminated by the lamp over you both.

Your hands swung side by side as you continued to walk. You and Matt had decided to make it a tradition. Every Friday you’d go to the club to either relax or hang out with your friends, and at the end of the night he’d be waiting. Ready to walk you home.

Turning the corner of your street you smiled, those frequent butterflies returning as you knew what was coming as soon as you both would stop in front of your door.

”If you want my number, be a gentleman and walk me home?” You fluttered your eyelashes at Matt. He nodded, lifting himself from his slouching postured and holding onto your hand.

He nodded forward, “Lead the way, doll.” You almost forgot what you were doing as you stared at your hands linked, his thumb subconsciously rubbing your knuckles. Driving you absolutely crazy.

“So this is where we part?” You joked, turning towards Matt as you had just climbed the steps up to your porch. Now you both stood in front of the door.

He sighed, shrugging. “I guess so doll, same time next week?” he suggested. Knowing for sure you’d see each other before that anyways.

You nodded with a blush and a smile. “Always.” the two of you stared at each other. The porch light flickering above you slightly, due to be changed. “I think you’re missing something. handsome.” you cleared your throat.

Matt smiled knowingly, leaning in to press his warm lips against yours. As they did so every single time he walked you home, and as they would for the future.

You and the mysterious man, Matt, climbed up your porch steps and stopped in front of your wooden door. The light flickering slightly. Strange, it must need changing.

“This is your stop sweetheart.” Matt sighed, looking at you knowingly. You knew what he wanted.

You sighed playfully, reaching into your purse which he had given back to you. Writing quickly on the post-it note you always carried around, you placed the paper on your palm and held it between you.

His hand moved up to take it, rolling his fingers in the process to hold your hand with the paper scrunched between the both of your fingers. “Thank you doll.” he whispered, leaning in and placing a warm kiss to your cold cheek.

[strawwritesfic]

Rajesh Koothrappali x Female!Reader: Swallow

Summary: There’s a chance you won’t end up with as many cats as Sarah expects after all.

Rating/Tags: T (drinking; drinking in excess; designated driver; texting; meet-cute; bars; set when Raj couldn’t talk to girls; set before Penny and Bernadette getting married to their canonical spouses; Penny & Bernadette; Penny & Bernadette & Raj; reader & original characters; mild language)

Challenge: “160 Collective Drabbles” challenge by BobaPop on Lunaescence Archives.

Tag List: @imaginesfire

Notes: Yeah, I used to watch this show with my parents. I stopped way before them, but I got requests for some of the characters, so...Anyway, please keep in mind any references to Raj being foreign and all were my attempts to reflect the show itself, not actually my own personal views. Same with the dismissive references to nerd culture.

Swallow

“Ready? On the count of three. One…two…three!”

With a chorus of clinking and several shudders, three shot glasses hit the hard tabletop. The sound had barely faded when one of the surrounding girls started giggling. Five stops into this barhopping experience and someone was sure to snap sooner or later. Sure enough, the next words spoken were, “Shut up!” 

The giggling stopped.

“Wow, guys,” you said, as you gathered up the empty cups. “Much more of this and I’ll be peeling you all off the floor.”

“Shut up,” Sarah snapped again, which only caused Cassie to break out in another fit of giggles.

You lifted a single eyebrow, and she quieted quickly enough. Then again, that might have had more to do with the death glare that Sarah shoot her. Angry Sarah, silly Cassie…you were starting to get a bad feeling about this entire venture.

“Seriously. I think you’ve had enough. All of you,” you added at Jess’s blank fidgeting right across from you. 

The entire adventure was for her benefit, but she looked the least enthusiastic of the bunch. Letting her drink herself into oblivion sounded kind on paper, sure. Forcing her to get up for work the following morning with a raging headache? Not so much. You took her silence for agreement; unfortunately, your attempt to take pity on poor Jess went absolutely nowhere.

Cassie shook her head frantically. “Whaaaaat? You mean we have to go home? But that’s not fair, [Name]! That’s just not fair!”

“Calm down, Cass.” Sarah patted the distraught woman clumsily on the back. “[Name] can’t make us go anywhere.”

“She can’t?”

“I can’t?” you asked.

Sarah downed another shot, then threw you a wide grin that you liked the look of not at all. “Just because you’re the designated driver–”

“Because I have to be.”

“Shut up. You’re the last person to have a breakup before Jess, so it’s your turn. That’s how it works.”

“And when’s it gonna be your turn?”

“When I break up with Dan. Which I won’t. So shut up.”

“This is a load of malarkey," you muttered

“Maybe we should ask Jess,” Cassie suggested, turning to the blonde still staring morosely at the table. “You ready to go home, Jess?”

“I thought Jake was my Dan,” was Jess's mumbled reply.

“Not enough booze!” Cassie cried with barely concealed delight. She reached for another tiny glass. “Sorreeee, [Name].”

“What do you mean, not enough booze? She's practically crying already,” you said, as Jess’s eyes filled with tears. ”

“She has to drink until she forgets Jake or until the bars close,” said Sarah.

“Are you kidding me? You three are already drunk off your asses!”

“Them’s the rules,” Sarah’s smirk swiftly transformed into her typical drunken scowl. “Until you get yourself paired off with some guy, you’re the driver on these things. Consider it an incentive to not wind up the crazy cat lady of the group.”

“I only have one cat,” you pointed out.

“Oh! Oh! Didn’t you say you were thinking about adopting another?” Cassie asked.

You shot her a death glare of your own this time, though its effect was not as great as Sarah’s.

“Oopsie.”

Sarah was too far gone to find any amusement in this revelation. She rolled her eyes and slid her empty cup toward your growing collection. “You don’t want to sit here watching us drink, fine. Why don’t you make yourself useful and go get us another round?”

“Oooor you could work the room,” Cassie said as she handed her glass over to you as well. “There’s loooots of boys here, and I’m sure you could find at least one smart enough to tempt even yoooou, [Name]!”

“Oh, you’re sure are you?” Sarah said.

“I’m sure!”

“Yeah, well you were sure at the last bar, too. And the one before that. And the one before that.”

“So?”

“So your optimism is grating. Shut up.”

“I think you should shut up!”

“I don’t think so. Why don’t you…”

Sarah’s voice faded into the background as you moved away from your friends. By the time you got back, Cassie and Sarah were likely to be at each other’s throats with Jess in tears over it. 

Barhopping always sounded a lot more fun when you were the one drinking away a breakup. Maybe Sarah was right. Maybe it was time for you to find someone else. You weren’t still hung up on your ex anymore–far from it, the jackass–but sometimes another cat seemed more appealing then another guy. You had yet to meet anyone that really made you want to work at a relationship. A few dates here and there. Nothing serious.

The bartender didn’t seem all that thrilled at you returning his dirty cups, though you were grateful that he didn’t send you away. The last thing you wanted was to be drawn into a fight that would be completely forgotten in the morning. 

Turning on your stool, you made to face the indie band playing at the back of the bar. They weren’t very good, but they beat the tar out of whatever was going down back at your friends’ table. You figured you could give the lot of them twenty more minutes, and then they’d all be so annoyed with each other that they would agree to go home. Until then, crummy music and snatched bits of nearby conversation would have to do for entertainment.

“Come on, Raj. Go out and buy some girl a drink,” a shrill voice punctured the otherwise dull buzzing surrounding the bar. 

You glanced in the direction it came from without thinking to see a tiny blonde woman–even tinier than Jess–gesturing at the wide selection before her and her two companions. The nearest to you was another blonde, taller than the other and with an air of practiced charm, who did not speak up until she had finished whatever was in her bottle:

“Yeah, you don’t gotta marry her or whatever. Just practice talking to a few. Otherwise you might as well have stayed back with the guys playing Call of War.”

The man they were speaking to simply looked pained. He clutched a beer so tightly in his hand that you were surprised it hadn’t shattered. Why he was even there, you didn’t know. He didn’t seem to be having a good time, and it was pretty obvious that he wasn’t the designated driver. He wasn’t even dressed to be at a bar–then again, neither were you.

“Come on, Raj,” said the tinier one again. “You can talk to us, can’t you?”

Raj shook his head.

“Not enough booze,” she said in a stage whisper.

The taller of the two women rolled her eyes heavenward, then mussed her hair up with her free hand before making to disappear into the crowd. “I’ve got an audition tomorrow. We wait much longer to do this, and there’ll be no one left here worth meeting. Let’s go.”

“Right. Our racks’ll probably do a better job than a pet scientist anyhow.” The other took a step to follow her friend. She didn’t get very far before she stopped and turned back to Raj. “If you drink enough that you can use that tongue of yours, feel free to join us.” 

A nervous nod on his part, then she was off at a trot. The two girls passed by you closely enough that you distinctly heard her mutter:

 “As if that’ll ever happen.”

Now it was you, this Raj fellow, and a few other mostly silent patrons at the bar. As bad as the band was, it was still live music, and most people seemed more interested in that than sitting around waiting for someone to buy them a drink. Not that you needed a drink, since you had three stops to make on your way home, and not that Raj needed another one before he finished the one he already had. You sighed and tried to concentrate on the music, though you were pretty sure it was giving you a headache. How much longer until Jess passed out?

A few minutes passed before you looked over at Raj again. He was still there, still looking downcast. Every so often he would sway to the music. You felt for him, poor guy. This didn’t look like his scene at all, and it must have sucked being ditched by his girlfriends like that. Perhaps you were two peas in a pod for the time being. 

It might have taken you another five minutes, but finally you worked up the nerve to go over to him. His eyes darted to you and away not once, not twice, but three times as you walked toward him in the semi-darkness. Raj was kind of cute, in a dorky sort of way. Not the kind of guy you normally met at these sorts of venues. Perhaps not the kind of guy who wanted to meet you at these sorts of venues, since he looked outright terrified by the time you stopped in front of him.

“Hi,” you said awkwardly.

He took a gulp of beer.

“I’m [Name].”

Raj smiled. Your heart banged uncomfortably in your chest. Obviously this guy didn’t want to talk to you. Why not bail? But somehow the way the small woman had dismissed him earlier made you want to try harder.

“And you are?” you prompted him.

He opened his mouth. 

You leaned forward eagerly to catch whatever came out, and…

He closed it again. Raj closed his mouth and swallowed and smiled and bobbed his head, and then went on to stare past you, as though you were nothing more than yet another license plate on the wall. 

You were so disappointed that you couldn’t find it in yourself to move away for nearly thirty more seconds. Well, you thought as you walked off, at least you tried. Maybe now everyone would be ready to leave so that you could escape the site of your most recent embarrassment as quickly as possible. Your first time talking to a guy in months, and it had to turn out like that. Maybe Sarah was right. Maybe you were doomed to be the crazy cat lady.

“Don’t forget we have to pick up our pet scientist before we leave.”

“I won’t, I won’t. Would you quit worrying? He’s not even drunk. He can find his way home just fine. He’s not our child, Bernadette.”

You looked up at the familiar voices. The two women from before stood just a little bit in front of you, looking bored and a bit more pink around the edges.

Before you could stop it, your mouth was saying, “Um. Hey.”

They looked over at you in perfect unison. 

“Hi,” said Bernadette hesitantly. “Can we help you?”

Probably not. Almost certainly not. Why you were bothering, you didn’t know, but you took a step closer and nodded your head in the direction of the bar. “About your friend back there.”

The taller one frowned. “Who? Raj? What about him?”

“Does he speak English?”

They stared at you so hard that you wished you had never spoken to either of them. Then they burst into laughter. Having no idea what you had said that was so funny, you could only watch on, bewildered. What? He looked foreign. No big deal. Him not speaking English would explain a lot–and perhaps bolster your. confidence a little. 

No such luck. Bernadette recovered first: “Of course Raj can speak English,” she said, as though this were obvious.

“Oh, I just thought–he wouldn’t talk to me...”

“Oh, sweetie,” the larger woman said, leaning forward and patting your shoulder so hard that you nearly toppled over. “He can speak English. He just can’t speak to women.”

“What?”

But they were already moving past you. “Pity he can’t find enough alcohol here to get him to talk. That one was actually cute,” Bernadette said, just before they walked out of earshot. 

Cute? You looked back over at the bar. Raj remained there, still intent on swaying to the music.

“Hey, [Name]! You gonna help or what?” Sarah shouted at you.

Startled, you twisted around to see her and Jess struggling to keep Cassie on her feet. 

“Move your ass! We gotta get her home before she starts vomiting. It’s your car, remember?”

You remembered. Raj forgotten, you hurried over to take the brunt of Cassie’s weight. What with Jess and Sarah being so inebriated, they could only hinder the group’s slow and unsteady progress toward the door. What followed was another chunk of time dedicated to getting Cassie in the car and buckled in while the other two made jokes at her expense. 

You had finally got everyone settled in and were about to open the car door to get inside yourself when you spotted the same trio from before leaving the building. Raj looked more upset than ever, but what did that matter to you? He didn’t speak to girls.

Wait. Speak?

“[Name]!” Sarah shouted after you as you raced away from the car and toward Raj and his two friends.

“H-Hey! Wait up!” you called. 

They did, though you suspected this was because you looked like a madwoman, running up with your arms flailing above your head.

“Oh. It’s you,” said Bernadette. “Did you need something, or…”

“Raj!” you said, slightly out of breath after all the physical labor. 

The look on his face made it obvious that you knowing his name was not something he’d expected. He didn’t talk this time either, but he didn’t have to. 

You dove into your purse, resurfaced with a pen and paper, and quickly scrawled your name and number across the scrap. “Here.”

Looking confused, he took your bit of paper.

“Text me?”

Before you could get a straight answer, you scuttled off. You had to get Cassie home, after all. 

Bernadette’s said one last thing in her high voice before your car door shut behind you: “You better text that one, Raj! Before all that beer leaves your system!”

“What was all that about?” Sarah wanted to know.

“I’ll tell you in the morning,” you said as your vehicle left the bar parking lot. “Let’s be quiet for now. Wouldn’t want to wake up Cass and Jess.”

She made a scoffing noise, but did as you directed. The drive home was relatively quiet and uneventful–save, just as you came back from laying Cassie out on her couch, your phone buzzing in the cup holder. You allowed yourself a peek and grinned.

“Rajesh Koothrappali. A pleasure to make your acquaintance.”

[the-tmnt-ficfinder]

Ficfinder finds: The Lemonade Leak

Chapter 19: The Sculptor

Chapter 19 Summary: No summary

The Sculptor: Appraisal and Ratings

(Don't know what fanfic "Appraisal and Ratings" means? Check out my explanation on my Main Masterpost! Looking for a different fanfic to read? Head on over to my Fanfic List Masterpost!)

Disclaimer: This fanfic is only available to those who have an Ao3 profile. This fanfic is written by @turtleinsoup, so go show them some love and support!!

The fanfic ratings are not based on quality, favoritism, or how good I think it is, but rather, how intense a subject may be. Like a movie review, or the tags on Ao3, letting the readers know what to expect.

Plot: 💛💛💛💛💛

"Plot is five out of five!! The jump from Donnie's POV to Mikey's is quick and jarring, but also incredibly effective!! Everything is going to be different now. Like, massively different!"

Suspense/Mystery: 💛💛💛💛🖤

"Suspense/Mystery is four out of five!! The suspense and mystery levels for this chapter originally start out low, as we the readers understand what happened between Donnie and Leo. Then as the story progresses, and more things are revealed, its suddenly apparent that the big picture had yet to be resolved."

Angst/Hurt: 💛💛💛💛💛

"Angst/Hurt is five out of five!! The amount of angsty emotions packed into this chapter is crazy!! The fear, the confusion, the dread, its all so potent!!"

Fluff/Comfort: 💛💛🖤🖤🖤

"Fluff/Comfort is two out of five! Some of the interactions between Mikey and Leo have some comforting elements to them, though it is somewhat marred by the severity of the situations."

Emotions Conveyed: 💛💛💛💛🖤

"Emotions Conveyed is four out of five!! Mikey's emotions are very powerful, and it really bleeds through into the writing!! The grief, the fear, its all so well written!!"

Drama/Tension Level: 💛💛💛💛💛

"Drama/Tension Level is five out of five!! The tension between Mikey and Leo very prominent, and the family drama is a big part of the story as the chapter progresses!!"

Triggers: 💛💛🖤🖤🖤

"Triggers for this chapter are two out of five. This chapter has less triggers, and more emotional angst in it. Most of the triggering things, are implied, or hinted at, rather than actually talked about or shown."

Legibility (Reading): 💛💛💛💛💛

"Legibility (Reading) is five out of five!! As this chapter is from Mikey's POV, I'd say its absolutely a wonderful read!! Its poetic, and flowing, different than the writing style of Leo's and Donnie's POVs."

Legibility (Audio): 💛💛💛💛💛

"Legibility (Audio) is five out of five! No weird formatting in this chapter!! So, its able to be listened to in audio book format!! Yay!!"

Length: 💛💛🖤🖤🖤

"Length is two out of five!! Chapter 19 of The Lemonade Leak takes about 14-15 minutes to listen to!!"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Next Chapter ->

<- Previous

The Lemonade Leak: Story Ratings and Chapter List

Personal thoughts on chapter below cut (Contains Spoilers)

Later, Mikey’d sketch over the memory, re-trace it for details, his mental brush hovering too long over the same spots, muddling Leo’s last expressions into loose suggestions. Mikey would re-tell them a thousand times. But here, oh no. His head was stuffed with crème au beurre, a savory-sweet non-knowing.

I absolutely adore how Mikey thinks in art terms, and baking terms. All creativity and creation. It’s fun to compare the thought style of the brothers, and how it affects how they interpret each others actions. 

Dr. Feelings didn’t answer. He was super silent lately, and a part of Mikey felt chewy about it, but maybe it was for the best! Mikey couldn’t trust him to do it. To help Leo. (Chocolate should be chocolate and nothing else, and all that!) Dr. Feelings would’ve tried to talk Donnie out of it.

It’s interesting how Dr. Feelings seems to be more of a presence in Mikey’s mind rather than a persona. I wonder, if that was built into his mind, like a fail safe mode to get his brothers to stay together. Because we often see that Mikey is very sensitive and caring. He’d never yell at people. However, Doctor Delicate Touch is very harsh, and Doctor Feelings takes no crap. They both deal with different things. Dr. Delicate Touch with physical issues, and Dr. Feelings with emotional problems. I wonder, does Mikey control this?

Where’s he at? Supply run? He tried to think back. Did he tell me? It was hard to remember. A lot of things were, lately. Memories kept smudging from frantic retracing, mental brush strokes unwilling to form.

Like a hand brushing over a graphite pencils drawing to many times over. Eventually it all smudges together, and bold light and dark contrasts all become gray. 

Mikey kept Dr. Positive at gunpoint while he closed the door to Donnie’s room.

Maybe because he doesn’t wanna be overly hopeful? Or because he doesn’t want Dr. Positive to leave… 

Mikey warped his arms around Leo’s neck and pressed his nose against the base of Leo’s throat. (By his nature. Like apricot confiture, clementine compote, or the skin of a peach – Orange was a sticky color. His brothers understood that the way they understood their own hues in the picture.) Leo didn’t try to wipe him off. This close, Leo’s scent filled him in a thick rush, petrichor and damp. At the base of Leo’s pulse, Mikey could make out every nuance, every past palette. The dried blood layering him, the sour lick of chemicals and far-away places. Those were the new normal.

The imagery that all these poetic sentences bring, is beautiful in almost a haunting way. I love how Mikey’s thoughts and emotions are objectified. How they’re expressed through colors, and sounds, and flavors. It’s simply stunning. 

Mikey tightened his hold and bumped his cheek to Leo’s. Dotting his purr with playful little pecks. “I love hanging out with you, you’re so cool! And fun. You’re so dang important to me.” He felt Leo exhale shakily, sinking into Mikey’s embrace, heavily. His muscles fought with themselves but lost against their own instincts. Leo buried his face in Mikey’s warm shoulder.

Out of all the brothers, Mikey is the one who is most in tune with his emotions. He’s also the one who is most in tune with his animalistic instincts, as they go hand in hand. You can clearly see how this give's Mikey a leg up on his brothers. They're all powerful in their own ways, and this is one of Mikey's ways.

Donnie, Leo. Missing. It was like half of Mikey’s body had been amputated, and he was left with phantom pain in every movement. His body itched and burned, so much; it was hard to feel much but the missing, missing, missing of my brothers.

Mikey’s role in the unit is to keep his family, so it makes sense for that to be instinct driven. It’s not even something he can control. Just how Donnie only feels welcome when he has a purpose, Mikey only feels happy when his brothers are around. Incomplete without them. 

Dad didn’t look up from the kitchen table. “What do you mean to say, Orange?” he asked.

Now that Donnie's gone, now that Splinter is no longer taking any of those specialized pills, he's up and about, and interacting with his sons.

Now, my last little thought is on the chapter name. The Sculptor is a very fitting name for Mikey. I find it interesting that the name the painter, or artist wasn't chosen. The sculptor seems much more fitting for this Mikey in particular. A sculptor, to create art, slowly chips away at a hard exterior, till its the shape they want it to be. Occasionally, they'll mold soft clay, shifting it to how they want it to look so that once it dries, it'll be in its correct shape. Other artists, such as painters add paint to a canvas, while a sculptor already has what they're given. Mikey chips away at his brothers, and molds them when they're soft, turning them into the art they need to be.

[ryansjane]

a ranking & summary of my thoughts on gmmtv 2024 part 1

pluto: this is my everything already. A GL??? with two of my fave actresses film & namtan??? AND a complex, interesting plot??? I'm obsessed already!!! this looks so good I'm so happy it's happening & it will become my whole personality once it airs!!!

the trainee: I genuinely believed, even with the rumors that off, gun, view, kapook & sea would be in a show together, that we wouldn't get an offgun show this year. AND I WAS WRONG!!! is this what it's like to always fucking win??? like genuinely, my ship is THAT ship, I'm so lucky & happy and I love them so much <3

peaceful property on sale: duuuude, this looks so fun??? I was already hooked when I saw new's over the top character, but a ghost haunting show with taynew, jan & mook??? absolutely incredible! this looks ridiculous & I know I'm gonna love every second of it!

my golden blood: bruh, thank goodness I was warned about jossgawin in advance or I might have had a heart attack, but honestly????? THEY ATE THAT! and mond playing the villain????? babe, that casting is incredible & perfect, I'm obsessed!!! I usually don't like supernatural stuff but I was also a teen wolf fan bruh so atp I'm gonna EAT that shit UP!!!

wandee goodday: you might not know it, but I have a super power. every time I start being a fan of someone who hasn't done bl, they do bl the following year. this year it was nonkul, and next year it's gonna be great sapol. AND I LOVE THAT FOR ME!!! this looks really good & fun, the characters are interesting and the story not too crazy or too basic. I can feel that it's gonna be good!

ploy's yearbook: a female-led show & the return of mond as a main??? BLESS!!! I love most of this cast, this looks fun as hell, I adore my gmmtv girlies... gotta watch this for sure! love seeing earth in more roles outside of his ship too!

enigma 2: I still haven't watched season one, am planning on watching it very soon, but I've heard great things so I'll be sure to catch season two as well! especially since I really liked toey jarinporn in the recent lakorn to the moon and back so I'm excited to see how she does!

my precious the series: as you know I've watched the movie in theaters, but I'm excited for it to be out as a series too, especially since there's extra scenes! seems like it might be even more lovable, and also if it's on gmmtv's youtube channel I'll finally be able to gif the iconic scenes :')

high school frenemy: this looks interesting & I like sky, but I feel like the plot doesn't make sense if it's not a love story... idk I feel like since this is adapted from a kdrama it's just gonna be a frustrating story that should be a romance but is reduced to bromance instead... I might still watch though :')

only boo: this looks kinda cute though basic. I don't know both main leads but might watch it.

we are: this has all ships I like, especially marcpawin & aouboom who deserve more spotlight, so I will be watching, but the plot seems really basic so I'm not expecting anything out of this world...

kidnap: this plot seems interesting but the cast isn't so... yeah.

summer night: I was so confused by who is supposed to be with who in the show lol, honestly I was down for dunkphuwin lmao, but this looks too messy for me :')

my love mix-up: I absolutely despise remakes even though I enjoyed kieta hatsukoi & like geminifourth, and although I'm certain this version will fix the chemistry issues of the original, I'm not gonna be watching it.

ossan's love thailand: same thing as for the previous show but even more so bc ossan's love is such a product of its time & shouldn't be remade in 2024 imo...

[acesofspadess]

And We're Live!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Worth The Risk Masterlist

You still couldn't believe that you had all made it to the live shows. You were excited to see Beverly and Bentley again as you hadn't spoken to them in a while.

"Making their debut performance, and the last of the groups, Simon." Dermot briefly introduced giving the floor to Simon. 

"Last act up tonight. Get ready. Its One Direction." The cheers were loud as your video played. 

“Being through to the live shows is absolutely incredible.” Harry started and you all agreed. 

“Im Louis. Im 18 and I'm from doncaster.”

“Im Harry, Im 16 and I'm from Cheshire.”

“Im Niall. Im 17 and I'm from Mullingar in Ireland”

“Im Liam. Im 17 and I'm from Wolverhapmton.”

“Im Zayn. Im 17 and I'm from Bradford.”

“Im Autumn. Im 15 and I'm from Hazel Grove.”

~~~~~

“You wouldn't connect this band with song normally… but it works.” 

~~~~~

As the screens opened you were standing next to Louis and Liam as the song started and Liam took his solo.

All of your solos, and choreo ran as best as they could. The chorus was the best as you all got to sing with each other. And you got the last line for your solo which you nailed if you say so yourself.

The cheers were loud as you all hugged shakily, the adrenaline still rushing through you. “When I heard you were gonna do Coldplay I thought it was a big big risk, but I love what you did with the song. You totally did it your own and I love that the band is working cause even though Simon is gonna say he put this band together, it was my idea originally Simon. It was. It was my idea and it worked.” Louis and Simon argued as you stood next to Louis who rubbed your shoulder happily. “I believe you could be the next big boy band… with a girl.” You laughed at that knowing you were in fact a boy band with one girl. “You have a lot of work to do with- Simon do you have a stylist? Or is it you?” the audience booed as you guys looked at each other slightly off put.

“I dont know who put you together because I wasn't there but you guys fit together so well.” You all jumped around at her words. “The song was great. You truly did make it your own. I wasn’t thinking of Cold Play then. Perfect pop band performance.”

The audience cheered and Danii’s words. “I have to agree with Danii, you look like you were meant to be together and in a group. You look fantastic. You've got all the ingredients for the perfect pop band. The girls and boys at home are going crazy for you, but you've got to take a little bit more time to develop as a group. That's all, just a little bit.” You grabbed Nialls hand after that and he squeezed it tightly. 

“As far you go in creating the group Louis lets rewind the tapes.” Simon fired back and everyone laughed. “Essentially you guys came together because your bootcamp auditions were not good enough, but you were too good to throw away. We took a risk. I’ve got to tell you what was so impressive about that- because its a big leap going on that stage- is when one of you started to screw up at the end Autumn and Liam stepped in and you brought it back together. Thats what bands do.” You and Liam- who was behind you- looked at each other and smiled as you rested your head against him briefly in gratitude. 

“And regarding the whole style issue, Louis… I don't want to style this band because I don't know how to style a band like this. We want the band to do whatever they wanted to do. I'm not gonna interfere, they're gonna do it their way. It was brilliant guys.” 

As Dermot came on stage you all got closer and saw Harry wink at someone in the crowd and you giggled at him making him look toward you and smile. You still held Niall's hand in yours and you let go of it only to wave as you walked off stage before everyone was wrapped in a giant hug by Louis. “Tommo!” you screamed laughing as it was your back he jumped on in the hug. Everyone laughed as you pulled apart and you saw Bev and Bentely. 

You ran to them giving them both hugs. “You did so well!” they cheered you on and you laughed anxiously. “We’re so proud of you, you know? We might not be able to make it to any more shows, but we want you to know that.” Bev told you and you shook your head knowingly. “Yeah I know. School and the drive must be really hard to balance. But I'm so glad you came when you could.” Bentely handed you a box without saying anything. “Man of many words.” you joked as open the box to see a new Blackberry. “No way you didnt.” you gasped as you jumped at him and he hugged you laughing. “First performance gift.” you laughed knowing how he would spoil you whenever he could. “Thank you Meadow.” he hugged you again. “Always Fall. Your Nan and Pap would kill me if I forgot but they said they'll try to get her soon. With the bakery being busy and the distance.” You understood and knew they wouldn't want you to think they didnt care. “I'll call them later and tell them its all alright.”

“Hey Autumn! We're going out to eat.” Harry called from a little ways back. “You gonna join?” you faced back to them. “Gotta get miss studious back to school. Sorry Fall.” you laughed it off because Beverly was the least studious person you knew, but school came easy to her. “Autumn!” Louis called.

“Okay I'll see you guys later.” You gave them another hug before running off and jumping on Zayn's back. “Ride like the wind.” you spoke mockingly until he actually started running and you couldn't help but laugh hysterically as all the boys chased you both through the stadium and to the car park. “Where are we eating?”

“KFC.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Worth The Risk Masterlist

tags:

@youcan-nolonger-run @ravenclawdirectioner

@luxiorchive @maeflowers653  @purple9950 @forkmeniall @nathalielovesonedirection @hopsydaisy @shortie-niya 

[allthingsfangirl101]

Seeing You For The First Time–Joe Keery

Joe's POV

I carried a box into the empty apartment. I couldn't help but overanalyze the safety of this place.

"That should go in the kitchen."

I turned around to see Y/N walking in with a box in her arms. I quickly put the box I was carrying down and ran over to her. I grabbed the box out of her hands and put it down.

"I can carry boxes," she teased me.

"Doesn't mean you should."

Y/N and I have been best friends since we were little. She moved in across the street and didn't have any friends. My mom was talking to her mom and they were worried about her. My mom asked me to befriend her. We instantly clicked and soon we were inseparable.

I moved to LA last year and it was the most depressing year of my life. Sure, I landed my role as Steve Harrington in Stranger Things. But it drove me crazy being away from Y/N. After weeks of begging and pleading and negotiating, I got Y/N to agree to move to LA.

Her new apartment is a ten-minute walk from mine. I plan on being over there all the time. Or having her at my place all the time. While I'm filming, Y/N is going to art school. She's an incredible artist. She won multiple awards and was the star of every art show in school. She also helped every theatre production with its backdrops. I have multiple Y/N Originals in my apartment.

My plan is to get Y/N a job working for Netflix. I may or may not have shown the Russo brothers some of her artwork. They loved it and were obsessed with the idea of Y/N working with us. They don't even care if she goes to art school or not. They want her to work with us starting next season. I just need to sneakily introduce her to the cast and get her invested before they officially offer her the job.

"Seriously, Joe," Y/N sighed as I carried in two boxes. "Please let me help you."

"Absolutely not," I said quickly. I put the boxes down, trying to hide how tired I was. But Y/N caught on. She grabbed her water and handed it to me.

"Thanks," I sighed.

"Please sit down," she begged. Before I could say anything, she grabbed my hand and dragged me over to the couch the movers put in a horrible place. She sat down, pulling me with her. She leaned her head on my shoulder as we relaxed.

"I'm really glad you decided to move here," I mumbled. "I've missed you like crazy."

"I've missed you too," she giggled.

"Want to come to set with me tomorrow? It could be fun," I offered.

"I'm in," Y/N shrugged.

"Great," I said, sounding a little happier than I should have. I cleared my throat, pretending like I was just coming up with this. "We could go to lunch. You could meet some of my costars. How about noon? We might be finishing the scene so you're probably gonna have to wait a little, if that's okay. I could take you on a quick tour of the set, head to my trailer, let me change real fast, and then I can take you to my favorite diner for lunch."

"Sounds great."

                                * * * * *

"Hawkins, Indiana is pretty cool," Y/N laughed after our tour. I grabbed her hand and pulled her toward my trailer.

"Who's this?"

We turned around to see Gaten walking toward us. He glanced down at our intertwined hands and smirked up at me.

"This is Y/N," I introduced, trying to ignore Gaten as he sent me his 'knowing' look. "She's my childhood best friend. She just moved here. Y/N, this is Gaten. He plays Dustin."

"It's nice to meet you," Y/N smiled.

"It's nice to meet you too," Gaten smirked. I really hoped she didn't catch on to the dumb look on his face.

"Well," I said, trying to get Y/N away from him, "we should get going."

Before either one of them said anything else, I pulled Y/N toward my trailer. Once we were safely inside, I let go of her hand and let out a sigh of relief.

"Everything okay?" Y/N laughed as she grabbed her purse off my couch.

"Yeah," I said, clearing my throat. "I was just. . . Gaten is a little uncontrollable. We always have to watch him."

"He's cute," she giggled as she walked over to me. I smiled when she looked up at me and stuck out her bottom lip.

"What's wrong, pouty?" I asked.

"I'm hungry."

I grabbed her hands and pulled her closer. "Then let's get you something to eat."

After lunch, we went back to set. We headed to my trailer and talked for a bit before I had to get back to work. I went the long way to the costume trailer so I could walk Y/N to her car.

"You're going to come over tonight, right?" She double-checked.

"Duh," I chuckled. "I'll pick up some food on my way over and I can help you finish unpacking."

"I'm already done," Y/N shrugged.

"What?!" I yelled making her giggle. "You did manual labor without your man?"

"My man has a full-time job," she laughed as she unlocked her car and opened her door. "He shouldn't be worried about me unpacking a couple of boxes when he's busy saving Hawkins."

"But his girl is so much more important to him than some kids in Hawkins," I said instantly. Y/N rolled her eyes as she laughed. She stood on her toes and kissed my cheek.

"I'll see you later," she said with a small chuckle. I stepped back as she got in the car. She started it and sent me a wave before pulling out of the parking lot. After making sure she was safely on her way home, I turned around and headed back to set.

                                * * * * *

"Where's Y/N?" Gaten asked as he walked over to me with his knowing smirk.

"She's probably at home, unpacking or getting things ready. Her semester starts soon," I said slowly, not sure why he was looking at me like this. "What's wrong with you?"

"The two of you are adorable," he smirked.

"Y/N and me?"

"I especially love how you become a different guy around her."

"I do not," I scoffed. "I'm the same guy. I don't change for Y/N. She's the only one who. . ."

I stopped talking when I saw Gaten smirking at me.

"You really don't see it?" Gaten laughed.

"See what?" I asked, losing my patience.

"How much Y/N affects you," he smirked. "You completely change when Y/N's around you."

"I do not," I scoffed.

"Yes, you do," he pushed. "I've worked with you for over a year, Joe. I know you. But the Joe Keery that I saw the other day when you showed Y/N around? I've never met him."

"I don't know what you're talking about," I stuttered.

"Come on," Gaten scoffed. "You were acting like a puppy following your owner who just got home from a long vacation, terrified she was going to leave again. You're whipped."

"I'm not whipped," I said quickly. "Y/N's my best friend. Of course I'm going to act a little differently around her. I don't want her thinking Hollywood has changed me."

"Bullshit," he laughed. "You're whipped. You're whipped. Joe is whipped. Joe is whipped for Y/N. Y/N and Joe, sitting in a tree. He's in love with her but won't admit it!"

I ran my fingers through my hair as he skipped away from me. My breath got caught in my throat when I saw Y/N walking toward me. She watched Gaten skip away with a confused look on her face.

"What's with him?" She asked when she got to me.

"He's a weird little guy," I stuttered. I cleared my throat before asking, "You ready for lunch?"

"Of course," she said, still studying me.

Y/N shrugged and grabbed my hand. I couldn't ignore the zoo in my stomach as we walked through set, hand-in-hand. My stomach turned sour when I saw Gaten watching us.

We walked down the street to one of the neighborhood ma-and-pop pizza places. On the way back, I took her the long way through the park. I pulled her out of the way as the sprinklers started. All of a sudden, I heard Y/N let out a devious giggle.

"What's wrong with. . ."

Before I could finish asking her what was wrong, Y/N pushed me into the sprinklers. I turned around to see her smiling at her with fake innocence.

"Are you okay, Joey?" She asked. "You must've tripped."

"How clumsy of me," I smirked. Y/N gasped, turning into a giggle when I grabbed her wrist and pulled her into my chest. I spun us around, the both of us getting completely soaked.

We started chasing each other through the sprinklers. We didn't care that people were watching us. Y/N always made me feel like this. I didn't care about anything anyone else had to say. As long as I made Y/N smile, that's all I cared about. She's all I cared about.

"Joe!" She shrieked. I wrapped my arms around her waist and picked her up. I walked over, out of the sprinklers, and set her down when we were out of the splash zone.

"We should go dry off," she giggled. "You still have three scenes to film."

My heart did a weird flip when she knew my schedule for the rest of the day. I grabbed her hand, unconsciously intertwining our fingers.

"We can go to my trailer," I said, pulling her with me. "I've got towels and you can steal one of my shirts."

"I love stealing your shirts!" Y/N said, jumping up and down excitedly.

"I love when you steal my shirts," I chuckled. "I should probably buy more if you're going to keep stealing them."

"One request?" She asked shyly.

"Anything, m'lady."

"Can you buy some that are a little bigger?" Y/N asked. "They're comfier to sleep in."

I'd do anything for you, I wanted to say.

"Sure thing," I said, instead.

We walked back to set without saying anything. I held her hand, checked before we crossed the street, and made sure she wasn't walking on the side closest to the street. When we got to set, we randomly started running and hiding around every corner.

"What are you two doing?!" Finn yelled at us.

"We're running," Y/N ran and giggled.

"Duh!" I agreed.

I grabbed her hand and quickly pulled her into my trailer. I slammed the door shut behind us and held her against my chest, wrapping my arms tightly around her.

"I think we're safe," I whispered.

"I think so," she whispered back.

I looked down, my breath getting caught in my throat when I saw her looking up at me. We stood in each other's arms, looking deeply into each other's eyes. A few minutes passed by without either one of us saying anything or moving.

"Joe," she whispered, finally breaking the silence. "I'm freezing."

"Oh yeah," I whispered. I let go of Y/N and quickly grabbed her a towel. I turned around to hand it to her and couldn't help but stare at her. We were both still pretty wet but Y/N somehow looked gorgeous.

"Thanks," Y/N smiled. She went to grab it but stopped. "Everything okay?"

"Yeah," I cleared my throat. She looked at me for a second before finally grabbing the towel. She started to dry her hair but she kept looking at me because I wouldn't stop looking at her.

"Joe," she pushed, "what's wrong with you?"

"I need to confess something," I rushed out.

"What?"

I closed the gap between us, stepping in front of her. I took the towel out of her hands and tossed it onto my trailer couch without looking away from her.

"Joe?"

"The year without you was the worst year of my life," I started. "I missed you every day. Nothing I did was worth it without you by my side. But when you agreed to move here with me, I was extremely relieved. I need you, Y/N. In every aspect of my life. Work. Friendship. Relationship."

"Relationship?" She repeated, her voice under her breath.

"I'm crazy about you, Y/N," I whispered. "I've been crazy about you since we were kids. When you're with me, all I can think about is making sure you're safe and happy and having fun. When you're not with me, all I can think about is wishing you were with me. I never want you anywhere but next to me. I know this sounds kind of obsessive but, I'll be honest. I am obsessed with you, Y/N. In fact, I'm in love with you."

"You're what?" She asked, barely audible.

"I am madly, obsessively, completely in love with you," I said a little louder. "And I need you to tell me how you feel about. . ."

Y/N grabbed my face with both hands and smashed her lips to mine. I instantly tightened my arms around her waist, pulling her closer as I kissed her back. Things sped up as we collapsed onto my couch. It took everything in me not to push her onto her back, crawl on top of her, and fulfill every dream I've had about her.

I forced myself to break the kiss, both of us out of breath. I leaned my forehead against hers, catching my breath.

"Joe," she said, still breathing heavily. "I can't believe that you're in love with me."

"Of course I am," I said quickly. "How can I not be? I've been in love with you since. . ."

"I'm in love with you too," she cut me off.

This time, I initiated the kiss. I leaned in and pressed my lips to hers. I felt her smile against my lips as she kissed me back. Our lips moved in sync as I gently pushed her back so we were laying down. I wrapped my arms around her, keeping her pressed between me and the back of the couch.

We jumped apart when my phone started ringing. I groaned, forcing my anger down as I reached into my back pocket and answered the phone.

"What?"

"Hello to you too," Gaten chuckled. "Are you and Y/N back from lunch yet? We need you on set."

"Shit," I mumbled. "We just got back. I'll be right there."

I hung up and sat up, pulling Y/N with me. "I'm so sorry," I sighed. "I'd really like to continue. . . this but I have work to do."

Y/N stood on her toes and pressed a gentle kiss to my lips. She broke the kiss and smiled at me.

"Come over tonight," she whispered. "We can pick up where we left off."

I pulled her into my chest and leaned down to kiss her. Our lips fit together perfectly, just like I dreamed they would. I broke the kiss with a small sigh.

"I'll pick up dinner on my way.

[snorlaxlovesme]

what is your favorite line/section of your sick CXS fic? It is so good and I love when authors can share some of their thoughts!

i feel so spoiled with these messages from you, thank you for being so kind my godd

(aforementioned sickfic)

it's hard to choose favorite lines bc genuinely i do love the whole fic so much. a lot of the time i'm writing off the cuff and it just flows out of me in one or two sittings (it's why i'm a one-shot writer) but this was a story that took me months to complete because of all the planning involved (and absolutely fruitless research into Chinese herbal soups, since literally NONE of that research made it into the fic lmao) and so the whole thing feels really special and different from my other stories just because of how much thought was put into it.

it took a long time, but i adored writing the second half, getting to write the same day over again and try to make it identical while FEELING totally different. having Lu Guang totally in pieces over every little change he accidentally makes to the timeline was mwaa *chef's kiss*

i think my favorite line was what i eventually pulling from to make the summary on AO3

"Lu Guang is so tired. He wishes he could freeze this conversation, this whole day, and go nap for a thousand hours. The stress of it all is sucking the marrow from his bones. He wishes he could do today over again. He doesn’t know if he’d have the strength to do today over again."

idk i just feel like it really encapsulates the struggle Lu Guang goes through in this fic and might literally go through on a day to day basis trying to re-live the timeline. like i'm sure every misstep feeling like something Lu Guang would want to do over, but how many times can he handle that, emotionally? like this day mentally broke him and it's literally the most nothing day. Lu Guang forgot to make one phone call and almost suffered cardiac arrest because of it.

plus its very sweet that Cheng Xiaoshi, sick as a dog and feeling down on himself for being left alone all day, comforts Lu Guang after this moment because he can see Lu Guang is going through like a panic-induced existential crisis and mistakes it for Lu Guang ALSO feeling ill, sweet boy ♥

i also really liked the simplicity of these lines (it includes spoilers so look away if you wanna read the fic first. )

But Lu Guang thinks of the tear-streaked smile after Cheng Xiaoshi took that first bite. Spending every waking moment agonizing over his next step won’t get him anywhere. Instead, Lu Guang folds up that smile and tucks it into a corner of his mind for safekeeping. Cheng Xiaoshi thanked him for today. Maybe that is enough.

that part wasn't in the original draft. these lines are in response to CXS thanking Lu Guang for caring for him and i think i had a bit of prose where LG internally laments that he spent half the day ignoring CXS and only took care of him when it was clear Qiao Ling wasn't going to be able to, so the thanks wasn't really deserved. or something self deprecating like that

i had sent my "final draft" to a friend after revising some bits in the flashback and said "i wanna post it but i feel like i need to mess with the ending still. it feels off" my friend insisted what i had was great but i didn't know if the last line of the fic ("Timeline be damned") felt earned. Lu Guang had been a slave to the timeline for the entirety of the story, allowing him to kind of/sort of say "fuck you" to the timeline for a brief moment felt like it was going against everything i had just established, of how IMPORTANT keeping to the timeline was to Lu Guang for the sake of being able to save Cheng Xiaoshi in the future.

it was my friend that gave me the idea to write a simple thesis line that shows what Lu Guang has learned from this. that disaster is definitely a potential outcome in Lu Guang's crazy plan, but seeing Cheng Xiaoshi at peace is enough to make him want to try. like you said in your comment on the fic, if you went back in time, you'd want to be kinder. those lines are Lu Guang reminding himself that seeing CXS at peace has an emotional effect on Lu Guang as well.

ALSO idk the "fold up his smile and tucks it in his mind" bit is cute okay? it's a very cute sentence and i'm proud i wrote it lol

this is very long so i'm gonna stop rambling but again THANK YOU so much for asking me this and for all your sweet messages. i truly can't get over how wonderful it's been talking about this story with you, it's only made me love it more and i already thought it was my magnum opus lmao

[anonymous-dentist]

DUDE WHAT THE FUCK THAT WAS ABSOLUTELY AMAZING!!

ohhh my god you have no idea how much this fic means to me. it's literally what made me fall into the qsmp fandom as a whole, so it holds a special place in my heart :')

there's a surprisingly low amount of f!cell/c!roier fics, and I'm so glad Bad Romance exists, because in my mind it's the most accurate portrayal of how their relationship would've been. fucked up, messy, but genuinely in love. they're different from the "original" guapoduo, but their feelings aren't! I love it! oh, and I adore how br!cell shows his affection and care towards roier - it's subtle, almost unnoticeable (because, as much br!roier likes to say "oh he's absolutely in love with me fr", when it actually comes to cell being worried or caring about roier's wellbeing, it slips past the narrative somehow - "he's angry at me, he's annoyed with me, I'm being a burden" - almost as if roier doesn't recognise the signs of someone loving and caring for him because he never actually got to experience this before, huh) so, yeah, I'm Very Normal about their personalities and these little details, it's genius, holy shit

this final chapter had me giggling and kicking my feet excitedly over every single interaction between roier and cell, their awkwardness was adorable! and the way you've implemented canon lore in their universe was incredible and terrifying at the same time, I kinda wish you were writing some of the actual qsmp lore at this point lmfao (looking at you, qsmp federation streams)

anyway, apologies for the long message, and thank you for creating this absolute banger of a fic! it's phenomenal and I won't be able to stop thinking about it for the next few months :) <3

Like I went into this fic and its prequel not having seen any of Chafaland outside of a few clips I saw on Twitter, but even then I could tell that cRoier doesn’t actually know what love feels like, not in the usual way. He’s got this weird concept around it kinda like how people worship celebrities: he treats love like a twitter stan would, and he wouldn’t recognize actual love if it was right in front of him because any actual love he felt for Natalan was never returned. He can’t see love for what it is because he sees love the way he does. If Cell isn’t acting like a total obsessed freak towards him the way Roier acts towards him, then Roier genuinely can’t see that as love. He sees it as a start towards love, maybe, but nothing real. Not yet. Hence why, even in the end when we the audience can see that Cell’s down BAD for this crazy little guy, Roier’s like “he’s still learning to love omg he’ll love me soon!” like my MAN! He already loves you!

[batmanshole]

ylfvaaa do you have any makeup and skincare recs 😭 im trying to get into skincare but i have no idea where to start, i see a lot of people hyping up korean skincare but idk what products live up to the hype. and i need new makeup badly but im scared of ordering a primer and then it sucks yknow. you seem really knowledgeable so if you can help me out it’d be much appreciated <3

hi anon. before i get into this i love you. i love when people ask me about this kinda stuff. makes me so happy. cosmetic chemistry autism.

ALSO to get your primer thing out of the way: i dont rlly use it but ive heard good things about the ELF one and my sister swears by the NYX one and her base is rlly good. so.

also i'd look on the following websites / stores:

sephora for western brands / mainstream kbeauty yesstyle for korean and japanese stuff chic decent or individual websites for chinese beauty (i usually get mine in person tho)

under the cut cause its long af. also i linked to some products but none of this is sponsored or affiliate or anything im just linking cause i like em 👍

OK FIRST OF ALLL. starting w skincare.

i would break down your routine into three main parts: -cleansing -moisturizing / hydrating -SPF

if you wanna get fancy, you can do exfoliation between cleansing and hydrating. but you really dont have to do that if u dont want to

first: cleansing

if you wanna wear makeup you should have a good way to take it off. no. no put the makeup wipes down. they aren't efficient and u will go through SO many of them. and they're a pain and can irritate ur skin w all the wiping (trust me on this one LOL)

i would recommend using an oil based product for this!! melts ur makeup OFFFF like crazy + even if you don't use makeup it will leave ur skin super clean ^__^ ALSO you should apply this to DRY SKIN and wash it off with lukewarm water (the oil emulsifies w water and also very cold water can make it harder to remove)

if you want an oil-based makeup remover for quick removal w a cotton pad: clinique take the day off (47cad ) this one is expensive tbh and isn't as effective as the others BUT. it takes a lot less energy to use + can be done quickly. if you want a cleanser that will take off your makeup incredibly well while washing ur face: kose softymo speedy cleanser (18cad) this is my absolute FAV. i use it allll the time it works so so well and ive reccomended it to tons of ppl before and theyve all liked it. if you want a cleansing balm for heavier makeup: clean-it zero cleansing balm original (30cad) i haven't tried this one myself, but i've heard VERY good things about it.

next i would follow that up with a water based cleanser (so foaming or gel). this will help to wash away all the stuff that the oil cleanser has loosened up and will wash away leftover oil cleanser.

my FAVOURITE is the senka perfect whip cleanser (14.50cad) i adore this stuff!! ive heard some people find it very drying but i havent had that issue? idk i've also heard good things about this beauty of joseon green plum gel cleanser (14.70 cad) but i haven't used it myself. huge fan of BOJ tho!!

(this is the part where you would exfoliate if you wanted to. for a chemical exfoliant i use the giant bottle of clinique stuff my aunt got me but its not worth the price tbh. u could also try the beauty of joseon apricot peeling gel (14.70cad) IF your skin can handle it. its a physical exfoliant tho so be careful. i also enjoy the pixi glow tonic. u can get this at like shoppers or cvs or somethign idk)

second: hydrating and moisturizing

okay so. this is super important if you do a lot of makeup and thus have to wash it away thoroughly.

i start with a hydrating toner. this helps to add water to your skin and smooth it (adding water before moisturizer is a good idea bc the moisturizers will both add moisture and lock in hydration from any prev products)

i use the the I'm from rice toner (38 cad but on sale rn) which is my absolute absolute FAAAV toner. super hydrating super perfect and beautiful. stunning. (you've probably seen people talk about the cosrx snail mucin, and it is nice i will admit. but do NOT use it if you are allergic to shellfish or dust, apparently. also apply it right after your hydrating toner, it needs to be on wet skin)

then i go in with a moisturizer!! i like to use ones with niacinimide or other humectants.

my go-to is the innisfree jeuju cherry blossom dewey glow jelly (35cad) she's so important to meee <3 love her. all time fav. it is SCENTED tho, so if you don't like that, try: beauty of joseon red bean water gel (17.80cad) super lightweight and has no noticeable scent. ive heard very good things and my friend is trying it soon ^__^

finally: SPF

this is THE most important step. sunscreen. wear sunscreen.

apply your sunscreen under your makeup in the morning, and throughout the day. if you wanna reapply using a sun stick, that's great!!! but don't use a sun stick as your ONLY protection.

also i'd avoid pure mineral sunscreens unless you have a legit allergy to chemical ones. mineral sunscreens are not as good and a lot of the marketing is iffy. also they leave a white cast which is esp noticeable on darker skin. mineral + chemical ones are usually fine tho :-)

my fav sunscreen is the biore UV aqua rich watery gel / watery essence (26cad) legit the best feeling sunscreen i have EVER used. my friends who hate sunscreen like this one. there's also the beauty of joseon rice probiotic releif sun cream (24cad) which is very nice too!! not my fav but a lot of people swear by it for reapplying throughout the day, i would use the beauty of joseon matte sun stick (24cad). ive heard super good things but ihavent tried it cause im finishing my other sun stick rn lol

this is all fairly basic stuff since u said you were new to it, but i can also go thru some less necessary, more fancy products if you ever need.

as for makeup, my favourite brands are:

-flower knows -rom&nd (romand) -daisique -etude -lilybyred

and i've heard really good things about / want to try:

-colorgram -judydoll -flortte -amuse -clio -peripera -into you

ok sorry this is so long but um. lmk if you have any further questions but my arms hurt so im gonna stop typing now. MWAH love you

[newvegascowboy]

could you drop the movie list (preferably in the order youre watching them in). asking because i really dont know anything about xmen but i want to 1) know more 2) look at logan. thankyou!

Omfg ive been watching them crazy out of order with literally no rhyme or reason💀 the actual order ive watched them in was

-xmen

- xmen origins: wolverine

- xmen - days of future past

- x2

Ive never actually seen apocalypse or dark Phoenix so those are next, maybe after i watch first class because i really like that one. Im not a huge comic fan so idk how any of the movies hold up against the comics. All i know is that comic!Logan is a short king.

For an actual movie order, chronologically:

- xmen first class (this movie actually rocks and ill die on that hill)

- og xmen trilogy

- xmen: days of future last (debatably good but i think its fun)

I dont think xmen origins wolverine is bad. Its ALSO a I Wanna Look At Logan movie, but its not exactly canon and is kind of goofy. Still. Logan in it Hot.

If you want a grittier movie, The Wolverine (not my fave tho). And if you want to Cry, but want Logan content, then Logan (2017) (also not a fave of mine but beggars, choosers. I did cry watching it the first time.)

Xmen had the misfortune of being produced during the era of superhero movies that had to be gritty and dark, so they take themselves a little bit seriously, but they can be kinda campy and fun. Logan/Wolverine is the collective Babygirl of the xmen universe and they spend so much time on him. Probably because it's genuinely devastating how hot he is. I want to bite him until my gums bleed. He's the typical broody hero you find in movies of the early aughts, but he's fun and cute so we forgive him. It's kind of annoying how forced all his romances feel, and the way his relationship with Jean is written is pretty borderline, so I like to just. Ignore alla that. The saving grace with the xmen movies is that doesn't deal with any multiverse stuff, and it was before Marvel turned to absolute shit, so i don't find the movies totally exhausting to watch.

The best movies for Looking At Logan are definitely the original trilogy. There's a scene in x2 where he's in a tanktop walking around the x mansion and his fucking arms. I'd chew on him like a country ham. Also his butt is out in days of future past and he gets some Nice 1970s styling. The Wolverine has a lot of fan service as well but again, the story aint my fave.

They are fun movies though, and i actually really like the prequel movies even though Logan only gets a cameo in one.

Also it's debatable or not whether dp3 counts as an xmen movie, but Logan is very nice to look at in it and the scene in the honda is fucking pornography