#its literally gonna be six hours like. all you have to do is let me talk about deïanira in women of trachis and you will

[kentucky-fried-thea]

autism test tomorrow!!!

[xiaosonlybeloved]

Longing~ Gojo Satoru

featuring:- Gojo Satoru, fem!reader, Megumi tags:- fluff fluff and fluff, reader is called petnames by Gojo (mostly darling) a/n:- sigh you all got lucky with the fluff again there won't be a next time and i love this man sm (and yes i did repost this bc i accidentally deleted the post ahaha...)

wc:-1.4k

masterlists

“Noo, [Y/N], no, don’t do this!” Gojo Satoru whined. “Why must you torture me like this? Are you really that cruel and heartless?” Previously, Gojo had been clinging to your arm while pushing his weight backwards towards the bed, but when that didn’t work, he gave up. Which meant that he had now attached himself to your back fully like a koala, still pulling his weight backwards to stop you from moving. With his lanky 190cm frame, your boyfriend had no trouble whatsoever in trapping you against him with his arms. Clearly, lady Luck wasn’t on his side though, because unfortunately you were still undeterred as you trudged towards the living room with the extra weight of a parasite on you, ignoring his whines of “No, darling!” and “Don’t do this to me!”. After all, you had absolutely no intention of failing this project assignment which was a pretty major part of your grades, whether Satoru did or not. And its just his misfortune that he begged the teacher  to be paired with you,

The living room was illuminated by the soft golden glow of the setting sun as you stopped in front of the couch with your back towards it, ignoring Satoru’s protests. “‘Toru, get off and get serious. You know this is darn important.” “Not more important than both of us getting our beauty sleep! Nothing is more important than that.” You tried to give him an unimpressed look behind your back. “You do know that if you fail this assignment, you’ll probably fail this year, right?” “I’m the one and only great Gojo Satoru, I’m literally not capable of failing.” He shot right back. “High talk for someone who cried like anything when he barely passed last year.” 

You turned your head to give him a nasty look, before pushing your body backwards. A surprised yelp escaped your boyfriend as he tumbled onto the sofa haphazardly, with you over him. Satoru was now trapped between you and the sofa, causing you to grin triumphantly as you started to get up to get the books out. 

However, that little moment of inattention was enough for Satoru, who once again wrapped his arms firmly around your waist before rolling over on the spacious couch. He propped himself up with both elbows on either side of your surprised face as he lay over you, a cocky smirk adorning his face. “Satoru.” “Nops, darling, not getting up.” He laughed. “Gojo Satoru, get. Up.” “You know that’s not gonna happen, sweets.” He chuckled, the sound making your heart beat faster. A moment later, his lips were on yours as he drowned out your next scoldings with a sweet kiss. And naturally, you couldn’t resist it as you gave in, pulling him closer. (Inner you was sighing at your weakness for this man.) “See?” Satoru said triumphantly as he separated himself from you after you both were out of breath. “Don’t you think this would have been much better than studying?” You dragged out a sigh and didn’t say anything. At that, Satoru leaned closer to your face again as he drawled out, “Cmon, I know you agree, darling. Why aren’t you saying anything?”

“Fine, Toru. Let’s make a deal.” He groaned at that as he said, “You’re not going to give up, are you?” “No, because I want good grades, but I can see you clearly aren’t going to give up either. So let’s both have our way. Since this is a maths project, we’ll divide it in half between us. So what should have normally taken six to eight hours will be done in three-ish hours. After that, we do whatever you want us to do as your reward for suffering with me.”

“Anything?” You sighed again. “Yes, Toru, anything, as long as it's reasonable.” Satoru grinned. “That works. Don’t go back on your promise, ‘kay darling?” “Yeah yeah yeah. Now get up.” He groaned again. “But this is so comfy!” You took a deep breath in and closed your eyes before saying, “I promised you your reward. That’s not gonna happen unless you get up.”, clearly enunciating the last words. 

He pouted as he slowly dragged himself up, dramatically throwing his arms behind him as he exclaims, “ My girlfriend hates me now. Oh, what am I to do?” You roll your eyes as you pull out the assignment papers and two roughbooks- you’d fair them out later. 

Almost as if on cue, Satoru’s cat came up to you, affectionately rubbing your ankles. At the betrayed gasp that came out of Satoru’s pretty mouth, the cat stopped nuzzling into you, instead staring at Gojo unblinkingly. “My cat turned on me too! Someone kill me!”

You laughed unsympathetically at Satoru’s woebegone expression, reaching down to pet his adorable cat. “Hey, don’t you think he’s acting like how you usually act?” You addressed his cat. She turned her stare to you instead, as if asking, “You’re putting me on the same level as this drama king? How low of you.” A moment later, a squeal escaped you as you started giggling uncontrollably. “Stop-Toru-stop=okay okay fine! Stop tickling me!” His savior of a cat instantly leapt up to your rescue as she started scratching his hands with her claws, causing him to immediately stop and pout at the cat, upset. You chuckled at Satoru’s theatrics as you squished his cheeks. “Now, get cracking, or you’re never gonna get that reward.”

*******

Nearly four or five hours had passed till then- you lost track- and Satoru’s patience was now nonexistent.

See, he’d planned to get over with it quickly,but in his hurry he kept making the stupidest mistakes in most of the questions.This wore out your patience very quickly, and you made him redo every single question that he got wrong till he got it right, telling him to not be in such a haste. Hence why it stretched out so long.

You shut the books loudly at long last, stomping off to the kitchen to get some much needed snacks., exhausted beyond belief. Satoru followed you like a lost puppy after a few moments, face appropriately contrite. You decided to ignore him as you munched on some chocolate wafers.

Satoru had the audacity to grab the rest of the packet from you, and collect even more snacks from the cupboards, causing you to glare at him angrily. He grinned in response, free from maths, as he dragged you back to the living room, quickly hiding the books and grabbing the TV remote.

“What are you doing now, Satoru?” You grumbled as he dragged you along. He flipped on the TV switch and settled onto the couch comfortable, pulling you onto the couch with him and snuggling into you.He put the stash of snacks on the table in front between you two and smirked. “Its movie night. You did promise, after all.” You shrugged, not averse to the idea. “Only if I get to choose what we watch.” “Sure thing, darling.”

*******

The TV light was still on at 4 am, the nth movie you two had watched was paused. You had fallen asleep on Satoru’s shoulder at some point of time, legs pulled up, cuddling against him. Snack crumbs were littered around the sofa, and Satoru wiped off a few from near your mouth gently, careful to not wake you up. He kept staring at your sleeping expression with a fondness in his eyes. 

The entire scene was so very domestic, it made Satoru’s heart long for more. He carefully adjusted your head against his shoulder more comfortably. Sometime in the night, Megumi had joined you two, although he’d promptly fallen asleep, shown by his light snores. His head was on your lap and his legs on Satoru’s.

Slowly, a small smile crept onto Satoru’s face as he gazed at the two people he loved with all his heart and more.

He wanted this to last forever.

But for now, he settled with whispering a soft “I love you.”, gently tucking in your hair and pressing a soft kiss on your forehead, and covering Megumi with the blanket he’d thrown off, resting his head upon yours afterwards.

requests are open, and tags, reblogs and comments are very much appreciated <3

[lizzyscribbles]

Today's MHA ramble is either gonna be great or ineligible and there will be no in-between. I'm on my computer instead of my phone today so I can type so much faster, but, I am slightly dehydrated and out of it because I just spent like eight hours outside in the sun for a renaissance fair so maybe I'll just pass out half way through, who knows.

Lizzy's MHA thought/ramble of the night: MHA and why I think it does the "power of friendship" trope the correct way (IE: Not cringy/weird).

Now, I honestly think trying to wrap up the intricacies of the end of MHA in just "the power of friendship!!" is doing the series a huge disservice, but in its simplest form, that kind of is what happens. To be honest, I'm such a sucker for this trope. I love it when we get to see all the people the MC (Izuku in this case) has made an impact on over the course of the series and they all come together to back the main character, that is thee shit and I will eat it up.

However, the thing I love about MHA's approach to this is something we see explored a lot through the series: the idea that you don't have to go at it alone. Like, I feel like the ending has so much more of an impact because instead of them all the other characters standing behind him and going "Yay!! You can do it!! Good job!!" No, instead they run beside him and say "rest, we'll clear you a path. We know we can't do this for you, but at least let us do this".

Because that's what a friend is. That's what friendship is. It's realizing that not only is a friend someone you want to protect, but it's someone who protects you.

It gives me chills Every. Damn. Time.

It's through that we get to see the impact Izuku has made on everyone in the series. I joke with people that even when Izuku has nothing to do with something that's happening, he has something to do with it, and that really comes to a head in the final chapters. In a sort of ironic way, it's what ends up defeating All for One, because it's literally the only thing he never managed to get. Deku says as much while they're fighting, that deep down All for One really is just a lonely man. He had power, people to do his bidding and hang on his every word, but the top of the world is a very isolating place to be because there's no one who can look you in the eye. Followers and friends are two different things, a friend is an equal, a follower is a pawn.

I think it's why All for One was so attached to his younger brother Yoichi, because deep down, he knew All for One in ways that no one ever could. It was the closest to a genuine loving relationship he ever got.

Honestly, it's part of why All Might failed the first time around too. He had a few friends, sure, but in the end he was surrounded by mostly fans. People who adored and appreciated him, but did so from behind a barricade. All Might pretty much worked alone - and Deku definitely couldn't have made the progress he made without the trail All Might blazed - but Deku had the one thing All Might never did: People who fought alongside him even when he didn't want them to.

And, honestly? I can't blame All Might for avoiding it. After all, Deku almost does this same thing. They both wanted to protect people so badly they don't want to accept help. They see themselves as the only person who's allowed to make sacrifices because they're so scared they'll loose someone. It's part of the reason I find such comfort in Izuku as a character, because he never wants to see anyone else hurt because of him.

However, because Deku reached out first in the beginning, because he made friends and took care of them whenever he could, because treated them as equals, they said "too bad so sad, you get our help whether you like it or not, because that's what you'd do for us". It's the beauty of those final episodes of season six and why I love them so much, because 1-A had no reason to go after Deku other than they were worried about him. They didn't take no for an answer, because sometimes it's a friend's job to take you by the hand and scream in your face to "TAKE A NAP!!! EAT SOME FOOD!! YOU'RE WEARING YOURSELF DOWN AND YOU NEED A BREAK!!! SIT DOWN AND LET US CARRY YOU FOR A WHILE!!!"

It's exactly like Ochaco says, they don't want to be protected. They're not fragile victims to be looked after. They didn't get blindly wrapped up in this mess, they dove in head first because they cared about Izuku and wanted to stand at his side.

And therein lies the difference.

All for One had followers.

All Might had fans.

Deku had friends.

Followers will only do as they're told. Fans will only cheer on. But friends? You can't tell them to do shit, they do what they want, and if they want to help you then they will. Friends go the extra mile. Friends run beside you when no one else can. Friends clear the path for you so you can deliver that final big ass punch.

That's the magic of this trope, and you can see it so clearly here because it's realistic. And by that I mean Izuku doesn't get a magical burst of energy because everyone was cheering his name from the sidelines. It came from them actually doing shit to give him a chance. It came from Aizawa bandaging his wounds, it came from Iida grabbing his hand and half-dragging him across the battle field, it came from Eri giving a little bit of her quirk, it came from Bakugo showing up at the last second to blast the crap out of someone, it came from the countless attacks launched by the rest of the heroes to give him a chance to get back on his feet.

You know what they say, actions speak louder than words, and that's the magic of this kind of storytelling. We don't need to be told they care through chants or claps, they just show us.

That's the true "power of friendship". People who don't just stand beside you, but sometimes run in front of you so you don't trip over that stump in the path.

That's friendship. That's love. And I think that's incredibly beautiful.

...these posts get longer every time. Maybe I need to stick to my phone so my thumbs get tired faster. 😂 This is what happens when I'm allowed to cook late at night. If you made it to the end, thank you and I salute you.

[idontplaytrack]

i need buff reader x janis, who carries janis and places her on her lap when janis doesn’t wanna eat 😫😫

Where else would I be, baby?

Janis ‘Imi’ike x fem! reader

Warnings: coarse language, fluff, bad eating habits

In which Janis sometimes gets so busy she doesn’t even think about eating and reader has eventually come up with ways to have her eat something

“Oh, my God.” The second you stepped into the house, you saw Janis out in the backyard, art supplies sprawled all over the floor. You rushed over to her, “Janis. You’re still here?”

“Where else would I be, baby?” She asks, barely glancing at you.

“Have you been sitting here all day?” You crouched down to talk to her, then just sat down.

“I did get up to use the bathroom.” She tells you, eyes completely focused on her art piece.

You raised your brows, perplexed. “Did you eat anything at all?”

“Didn’t you even think about it.” She mutters.

“I’ve been gone six hours, Janis.” You looked at her, horrified.

“I’m not hungry.”

“Because you’ve been here, engrossed in your art.” You sighed, “Come on, let’s go out for dinner.”

“No, I need to get this done.” She says dismissively, “And you just got back from work, so…”

“So, we need to eat.” You stated.

“You go.”

You scoffed, “Janis.”

“y/n.” She mocks.

You exhaled, a little frustrated, “Janis, come on. It’s dinner time and you barely ate anything at breakfast.”

“Yeah, being on a period will do that to ya.” She laughs dryly.

“You know what I’ll do.”

“Try it, I don’t care.” She replies, tongue sticking out slightly between her lips in concentration. “I need to finish this tonight. I’ve been putting this off doing nothing for like two weeks.”

“I’m literally about to pick you up off the floor so you will sit at the table while I make dinner. If I have to spoon feed you so you’ll eat something, I will do it too.”

“Sure.” Janis chuckles. “Please do that.”

“Wouldn’t be the first time.” You nearly snorted, standing up. Easily, you picked her up when she least expected it and walked into the dining area then placed her on the stool by the island.

She sulked, clearly defeated. Janis groans, resting her head on folded arms. “I know you like working on your art, but you gotta remember to take care of yourself, baby.”

“I know, I know.” She sighs softly, “I just forget. If I busy myself with something I don’t even feel hunger, it’s like the last thing on my mind.”

“Which is why I told you…you gotta take a break every now and then, get up and stretch, walk, drink some water, have a snack.” You turned around to face her completely for a moment. “You need to eat to survive.”

Janis sighs, “It’s a bad habit, I’m sorry.”

“And that’s exactly why I’m helping you out with that.” You shrug. There was leftover rice in the fridge from last night so you took that out and opened up a can of Spam, along with the half-used bag of frozen vegetables. All that in a pan, dinner was settled and ready soon enough.

“Are you gonna try to avoid me now that the food’s done?” You eyed her suspiciously. She struggled with it sometimes. She’s never said it, but her actions spoke louder than words.

She doesn’t say anything but sulked and raised her brows. A sigh then falls from her lips as you plated the food. You left your portion in the pan though, literally instructing her to sit in your lap so she couldn’t go anywhere until she’s had her food. You weren’t eating anything until you knew she’s eaten. You’ve had your lunch, she hadn’t. So, you know, she had to eat. You could wait a few minutes more.

But of course, Janis was a little shit sometimes. Refusing to even sit down beside you now. “Ipo.” You exhaled harshly, “It’s like you want me to put you in my lap just so you’ll stay put and eat.”

She grins, “Maybe I do. Be my guest.”

Without a second thought, you grabbed her off her feet, away from the fridge. Closing its door in the process, “That was too easy.”

“Yeah, you’re jacked.” A chuckle falls from her lips.

“Okay, now— eat up.” You handed her the spoon. Janis jokingly groans but still dug into the food. You rested your chin on her shoulder with an arm wrapped around her waist.

“How was work?”

“I smell like popcorn, and I got new blisters. And a customer yelled at me today, so…same old, same old.” You laughed, pressing a kiss to her shoulder.

“Ouch.” She turned her head slightly, seething at your revelation. Then, she spots the red bumps on your hand. “That looks…painful.”

“Eh.”

“Aren’t you gonna eat?”

“My head hurts, so I think I’m gonna go take a hot shower afterwards first before I eat.”

“You can go now.” Janis tells you, shoving a spoonful of the fried rice into her mouth.

“I kinda don’t want to.” You said quietly, arm tightening around her waist.

“Hm, why’s that?” She asked, a cheeky smile forming on her face.

You let out a sharp exhale through your nose, trying not to chuckle, “I just wanna spend some time with you, is that so bad?”

“Aww.” Janis teases, “Go drink some water. Maybe you’ll feel better.”

“No way. You’ll run away from here and we both know that’s a fact.” You gasped, “You’re my prisoner until you finish this plate.”

“Oh wow.” She replies, bored.

“Excuse me?” She played along, “Janis ‘Imi’ike. Just trying to make sure you stop this unhealthy habit eventually.”

She ends up giggling, “Sorry, baby. I know.” Janis turned to look at you, beaming. You sighed, “You’re so fucking cute, you know that?”

“Oh, I am?”

You pressed a kiss to her cheek, reaching your hand up to squeeze her chin, “Yes. Yes, you are.”

🏷️ Tag list

@ashecampos @auliisflower @cheesysoup-arlo @frogs00 @ludoesartnstuffs @pda128

💭A/N

I’m actually giggling at my screen reading back on this drabble lmao.

[memberment]

GOOD MORNING EVERYONE

So the Trinitarians brain worm is back and Morning Glory is now longer and biting the dust as far as my focus goes.

But like, I genuinely want to talk to anyone who's invested in what's to come as far as part two goes. SO PLEASE. I IMPLORE THE FOUR OF YOU WHO PERPETUALLY TAKE NOTICE OF MY SCREAMS INTO THE VOID.

We're all aware that Trin is a time loop fic. That is confirmed.

BUT THE PROBLEM IS HOW I'M GOING ABOUT DOING THAT. AND I NEED INPUT FROM PEOPLE THAT ARE NOT ME AS FAR AS PLEASES AND SPARKLES GO, YES?

Because like sure I'm writing it and like fuck everything else, let me tell my story. But it's the how of it all like if I'm gonna throw another 200 give or take hours into this I would at least like one person to be having a wonderful time drinking and driving (I have since remembered this is not a common phrase, I do not mean this in a literal sense, it's an expression) with me right?

Part two is going to be 50 chapters, give or take. (Part one is about 37 for reference.)

So the plan for part 2 rn is (ROGUHLY):

(1-10) is the second timeline. There are a lot of importants and I cannot just glaze over it all more than that. But we're also working in a bit of a shorter time period than the original events of the story and introductions do not need to happen again, right?

(11-40)ish would be me running through the next timelines in a set up structure -> what changes -> the results of said changes and then inevitably what sends our looper backwards. It wouldn't be running through all the timelines but the more notable ones in kind of a four chapter structure, I am not fully sold on four, but rough estimate yk.

And then 41-50 would be the finale of part two. It's literally the last timeline in its glory and then the epilogue which kicks off part three.

COULD AT LEAST ONE OF Y'ALL SIT THROUGH THAT OR DO YOU GUYS HAVE ANY NOTES AT ALL BECAUSE LIKE

I personally kinda like it but if not a soul is reading this I am throwing myself on the curb with the rest of the garbage LMFAOOO.

I NEED THOUGHTS. OPINIONS. COMMENTS. CONCERNS. ANYTHING.

Anyways, I'm going to work. I have off tomorrow and I broke the ff investment seal for today so insanity and updates will be here tonight and homework will be tomorrow.

HOPE EVERYONE HAS A GOOD DAY <3

(9:30) I am literally falling asleep as I lazily write this angel based on Danse Macabre. Expect all of maybe one more update tonight if the tacos I am abt to receive don't wake me up LMFAO.

Also, I am almost saddened by not having something to post tm. Anyone want an early chapter of something that isn't Genesis/Desolation bc they're both on Monday?????? (I am feeling like a menace rn)

(10:19) tacos and the absolute yap session I just had did wake me up a bit. MAAAYBE might write some more. Idk I slept like three hours last night and went to work I'm kinda dead. But we're at 98.2k!!!!!!🥳

(11:06) okay we made it to 99.6k everything besides the flashback for 31 is done. I'm about to relax and watch something and figure out mechanics of some of this because god this series is A BEAST. Like, I still have six planned chapters left.

Pure insanity. I love it here. I hate it here.

Holy shit wait I just came to the realization that I started this fic exactly one month ago. I have belted out 99.6k for THIS FIC ALONE. (Moreso if we're including future shit that hasn't happened yet)

IN ONE MONTH.

THAT IS FUCKING CRAZY WHAT HTE FUCK LMFAOOOO

I may or may not be cooking we’ll find out in 6-26 business hours

(5:28) So I just had a very interesting past few business hours. I read a fic I've been waiting ever so patiently to finish. That's cool, right. I go for a walk at 4 in the morning because I'm insane. Fantastic. I get home at five and I'm like ohhhh well what do I do now it's not sleep time yet. Oh write I'm supposed to be drawing.

Nope I reread the epilogue of morning glory and realized Tweek's first address is for my morning glory and Craig's last sign off is your morning glory and now I'm ready to throw myself on the curb with the garbage as I sob. Someone call a trusted adult for me thanks.

[that-one-anxious-mango]

You + Me = US (1)

Summary: After a shocking discovery is made that you decide to keep to yourself out of fear..you realize your secrecy may be doing more harm than good.

Content: BIG ANGST. Reader feeling sad and conflicted. Appearance of a friend. Argument and Tension between Austin and reader. Tense and sad Austin. Just all around Angst. 

A/N: Hello Beautiful humans! I hope you’re all well. I know this is something I hadn’t planned out putting out so soon. But seeing as ya’ll wanted the first part of the juicy angsty story I mentioned so bad..this is it. I hope you all enjoy because..yeah. Much love. *hugs*

P.S Please Always feel free to comment, reblog, and send me letters about the fic and anything else pertaining to the series!  And also let me know to be added to the taglist! 🏷️

Taglist: @purejasmine , @wacoshuffle

---

So here you were.

One Bathroom Counter

Six tests.

Twelve brightly positive lines.

One Shocked Alana

And one terrified you.

The room was so silent you could have heard a pin drop.

You almost couldn't believe it.

You were pregnant and scared shitless.

Immediately you’d burst into tears while Alana who usually wasn’t one for traditional methods of comfort..did her best.  

From there a hour crying session began until you got the strength to talk.

" Alana what am I gonna do. This isn’t suppose to be happening right now. Not n-now." You sniffled out hanging on to your friend tighter.

This was bad..no scratch that...it was terrible timing.

You had just finally broken some ground at work and was finally feeling like your contributions were being used. Austin was riding the high of Elvis and had also just finished filming Dune part 2. Not to mention you'd only gotten engaged not even three months ago and hadn't been in the new condo two good months...which you'd been literally going at it like rabbits in.

But still, everything was flowing just the way it needed to flow, and something like this was certain to disrupt it.

" You're gonna have to do what you need to do, babes. No matter what you need to take care of you first above all else." Alana offered.

Looking at her with red eyes you asked, " What would you do? "

Mirroring you back with a face of stone Alana was hesitate to answer because in her mind.. you may not have wanted to hear her true opinion. 

She replied, " Honestly."

Taking a breath you nodded.

" Well...."

—-

It'd been almost a month since you'd found that you were pregnant. And it had not been a easy ride. Between the fatigue, constant nauseous feeling, tiredness, and the task of doing your best to hide all signs of the minimal morning sickness from everyone.

You were exhausted.

But still the only two souls that knew were you and Alana.

And as much as you wanted to tell Austin and everyone else...you weren't ready.

Immediately when you stepped inside your home you smelt the delicious scent that carried through the air along with the soft jazz music you could hear from the kitchen. When you entered you were greeted by a enthused Magnus who did his everyday duty of administering your daily dosage of puppy kisses. After you went to the kitchen.

" Hey, mama. Been waiting to see you all day." Austin chirped from his post at the stovetop. He looked to have been making Fajitas and yellow rice, one of your favorite things he made, but  your stomach didn't jump at the sight of them like they normally would.

" Hi. That smells good, babe." You responded slowly inching toward the living room faking a smile. Really the closer you got, the more you wanted to gag. It smelled so funny.

" Thanks. I figured it had been a hot minute since I'd made it and I know its a favorite of yours. I thought we might eat this for dinner then maybe we could finish another chapter of the book we got Saturday upstairs."

You just nodded, " Yeah, Aus. That sounds nice. I'm gonna go lie on the couch for a little bit though. Feeling little tired." You informed.

Austin had to hold back the sullen expression that wanted to form and instead replace it with a small smile, usually whenever he cooked you were perched right on a seat at the kitchen island chattering and giggling. But as of recent that hadn't been the case and Austin would be lying if he said it didn't bother him.

" Okay."

From there the two of you had dinner as normal making little small talk here and there. Mostly work talk and little about plans for the summer the two of you had made which now made you said since they might not be feasible with the new information of your...condition.

Post dinner Austin let Magnus out to potty before you both ventured upstairs with the happy hound following where the two of you separately shower and change to then got in bed and Austin took his turn to read.

Feeling actually tired you let him sort of cuddle you with his unoccupied hand on your back while your head rested on his chest and your legs were intertwined.

Seeing that the book was a romance once you'd hit a certain part of the chapter it'd gotten..spicy . And with the two of you particularly in a enclosed space like your bed, it wasn't shocking to you when Austin decided to make a move.

He'd leaned in and grabbed your face pulling yours to his in a sweet kiss. A kiss that you couldn't help but naturally blend into. This was the most action the two of you had seen in a while. He was enjoying being this close to you. He drank in the scent of mango and vanilla that came from you and savored the soft of your skin on his fingertips. 

Gaining more traction without breaking the union Austin had managed to to set the book aside on the nightstand while maneuvering to hover over you. Everything was okay until you felt a hand move from caressing the top of your breast down to brush the top of your stomach.

Startled you abruptly pulled away alarming Austin.

" Whoa. Hey you alright? What's the matter? " He questioned searching your face.

Putting on a poker face you nodded, " Yeah I'm fine, babe. Just..do you mind..." You trailed silently gesturing for him to move off.

Obliging instead of just rolling over, Austin got up from the bed standing to look at you. You couldn't quite pin-point what he was thinking, but from his expression it was clear he was bothered.

" Y/N what's going on? Is it me? Have I done something? "  He asked.

Shaking your head you scooched off the bed moving to stand, " Of course not, Aus. Why would you think that? It's fine. I'm fine." You said feeling a whoosh of anxiety enter your chest.

" Well I honestly don't know what you want me to think, baby. I mean as of late every time I come near and try to hold you , you move away from like I got the plague. We haven't had a date night in three weeks because you always keep saying you're too tired or busy. Whenever I'm home and I cook dinner for us you don't wanna even sit down and eat with me." Austin poured looking at you with pleading eyes. " It feels..like you don't want me around most days."

Your eyes began to water hearing his outpour of concern and neglect. 

“ That’s not true, baby. You know I want you around all the time.” You tried assuring.

You hadn’t meant to get this way. You felt terrible. Like a monster. You'd never meant to make him feel this way.

A bitter laugh left him, “ I can’t tell.” 

Looking at you he could see that you felt bad and once your tears began rolling,  he felt his eyes begin to feel moist.

" Baby...." He dragged out trying to keep the strain against his voice small, " We're not even making love anymore. The last time you let me touch you was almost a month ago. A-and before that we could barely keep our hands off each other." He painfully pointed out thinking about all the passionate love making the two of had been doing. You used to joke around with him and tease that he had to be part energizer bunny because he never needed a recharge.

But nonetheless it was true.

You'd been avoiding him, and tucking yourself away while you tried to figure out what you were going to do.

Doing little things like wearing loose clothes even to bed when he knew you preferred to be near naked most times. When he'd offer shower with you, you'd always politely decline brushing it off as you were just going to be in and out. You put space between the two of you when you watched shows or ate dinner. Austin had taken note of it all, and while he had been trying to give you some space and be supportive. But he feared he was at the end of his rope.

But still you couldn't find the voice to say anything back to him, and this unfortunately heighten his emotions so bad that he said the unthinkable.

" You know what cut the shit, Y/N! " Austin sighed placing his hands into his face. " Who is he? " Austin accused feeling like you'd just been struck in the chest.

" E-excuse me." You gawked in disbelief at what your fiancée was shockingly insinuating. He had to know better than even letting a passing thought like that enter his mind.

" You heard me. Who is he? " He repeated with more attitude. " Because whatever you're not getting here you gotta be getting somewhere, right? It's Lucas isn't it?" He sourly threw out the name of the name of your friend who'd been helping with your photography classes you'd enrolled in. The same Lucas from the night at Alana's party that had tried to get extra friendly with you. “ You’re fucking him, aren’t you?” The words thrown out like venom.

You felt you heart race prompting you to rest a hand on your chest as you tried to calm yourself down. But no much how much steady breathing you practiced, it wouldn't help stop the tears that began cascading down your face, " Austin...H-how could you even think that. No! There isn't anyone else. Not Lucas..not anyone!" " You choked out in disbelief full on crying now.

Raising his head to look at you he sighed, " Ah hell, Y/N." He mumbled in discontent at seeing you cry the way you were. He hated when you cried. " I don't know what to think at this point! This isn't like us. This isn't like YOU."

You nodded feverishly trying to calm down, " I know...I-I just don't feel like myself, Austin." You half confessed being sure to leave out the major components of why.

" Okay, I understand. And I absolutely hate that your feeling that way. But I can't help you if I don't know what's going on. Can please you tell me what's wrong. I wanna be here and help you. But you're shutting me out. Please." Austin pleaded looking at you intently, all he was asking was for something..really anything that you could tell him to steer him in the right direction. Because right now he felt lost.

Biting your lip to the point of near bloodshed and twiddling your thumbs you contemplated just spilling your guts and telling him right then and there, but the little voice in your head agonizingly sniping at your thoughts wouldn’t allow it.

If you tell him now it becomes real. And there isn't anything guaranteeing that he'll be happy. I mean you told him about your childhood, why would he want someone damaged like you to raise a child with.

Who would want you as a mother?

Feeling like the walls were caving in you just barely spoke, " Austin. I want to....But I can't.... I just can't."

The words had come out.

And now you had to painfully watch as his face fall at your response. It was like you could see a little embers of hope die behind his eyes, and it broke your heart even more to watch as he sniffled up what would have been a stray tear.

When he responded his voice sounded taut, " You know when we first started dating and we played that game with all the questions. And I asked you to describe our relationship in three words. One of the words YOU specifically picked was honest." Austin reminisced reminding you both of the happier time. He took a second to breath until his glossy eyes met yours in a intense lock, " W-when did that change?"

Once he finished, he then proceed to back away from you softly wrenching the bedroom door open, he casted you one more look before closing it behind him.  Leaving you to shakily lay yourself down on the bed and wrap yourself in the covers to ensue in a good old fashion sob out.

That night for the first time since the two of you had gotten engaged and moved into the loft you'd sleep alone in your king size bed. You heard when the guest bedroom had opened and closed. This only made you cry more.

You felt cold. And not just because the usual warmth Austin gave off holding you in the night wasn't present, but really because it was as if you were standing in the middle of nowhere with no shelter and no place to turn.

You felt alone.

In the wee hours of the morning while your fought yourself in and out of sleep you'd heard the bedroom slowly creep open. With your back to the room you listened as he moved about the bathroom and the closet in what you knew was him getting ready for the interview line up he had today for some of the precursors for award season.

You so badly wanted to turn around and call out for him. Apologize and explain everything a thousand times over. But still it felt like your body physically wouldn't move.

When he came out the final time, you could hear him come to his side of the bed and put something on the duvet. He sighed before turning around and back out the door closing it softly behind him. The alarm chime could be heard soon after and that's when you knew he was gone.

Slowly pulling yourself up to turn around. You hit the toggle for the lights and looked at the folded note that sat on his pillow.

You'd be laying if you said that your heart didn't fall to your ass. Was he leaving you?

Numbly you grabbed the note bracing yourself to take in it's contents.

Then you read it,

Dear Y/N,

I know that I already told you that I'd be out for most of the day today but I also wanted to let you know that when I get home I'll be retiring to the guest room.

I don't exactly know what's going right now but I just feel like I'm putting in so much effort into this relationship as of recent only to receive half of it back. And as a couple who recently got engaged..this worries me. I understand that you have a tough time opening up about certain things bothering you and that is completely understandable. But just what I don't understand is why your pulling back from opening up to me after all we've been through in two years of progression.

With that being said, for right now I think it'll be good if we just take some space. Hence why I'll be staying in the guestroom for a couple of days. Unless you're ready to talk in some type of honest capacity or there is some type of emergency, I ask that you please respect this boundary for the time being.

I love you, Y/N. And I know we can work at this and overcome whatever is going on.

But I badly need you to try.

I'll still be home in time to make dinner as normal and I'll leave you a plate in the microwave.

All my love always, forever, and beyond,

Austin.

[hibiscussoupbowl]

Yk what ive already made all my statements abt the teen wolf movie on instagram but imma say it here

As much as i love and breath teen wolf, its not the perfect show which is fine bc recognizing that is what makes its good. The thing is the movie? Godawful. The one thing i can appreciate is that the movie had an opening and the graohic design was cool

My problems with it?

-the plotline being abt allison. I think alisson (is it allison or alisson?) Is a fine character especially in s3, however, you killed her off. That whole s3 ending was abt her dying and isaac leaves BECAUSE of allison dying. Now ur gonna reopen that plotline that was TIED OFF? Ur not even gonna get stiles or isaac back into play even tho theyre arguably the most important for that season. And ur not gonna tell us how s6 ended??? Even with a flashforward of 2 years??

-the fbombs. Im sorry, what? U make a show that doesnt use f bombs at all and u make it creepy and horror but when u make the movie thats r rated meaning u can go even harder... u use it on fbombs? Might i add in the worst way possible. "Darkness motherfucker" wow. It just sounds so cringey. Either use it once meaningfully or dont drop one at all. U managed to make s3 be creepy without it do it again

-why the absolute fuck was liam in japan. By the hour and a half mark that question wasnt explained and it never was. Him and this girl hikari (whos gr8 actually) are just in japan and i guess own a bar??? I dont even know what they are to eachother let alone how they ended up there. I only knew that they love eachother bc they say that in jpn but like still??? Is it a sibling ily or a were dating and ily?

-the actors. Im sorry but if ur gonna get all these actors like masons and parrish and malia and whoever but u give them like what one line? Mason had legit like 2 lines in that movie. And u dont even know how he beacme a police officer! He just is! And they dont even say anything abt corey??? U could easily get his actor i know he aint doin anything rn. Liam and hikari? Also have like 3 lines in the movie

-personal thing lol but not everyone looks good with a beard and a shaved head

-lydia and stiles. Just bc u coudnt get dylan obrien cuz hes like the most succesful does NOT mean u just break up the couple that u built for six. seasons. You couldve said literally anything you couldve said stiles was dealing with some fbi shit or another supernatural disaster. Lydia having the dream? Tragic but stiles wouldnt have cared bc he loves her and wouldve just wanted to be with her forever.

-how can u not tell us who elis mother is. We ALLLL wanna know who derek banged im sorry but he slept with the enemy like three times and with his history and family history everyone just wants to know who it was.

-dereks death. WHAT THE FUCK this man survived a *pipe* going thru his back for like 10 minutes and survived, got brutally slashed and survived and ur telling me he died by magical fire. Sure teen wolf sure.

-if ur gonna introduce a character like alec in the season finale, bring him into play somehow recast him idc but do smt. Even nolan! Someone !

-what was with the whole nogitsune temple thing?? It was so... not scary at all and it looked bad. Like idk it was just so kiddy. Like oh noooo we re trapped bc we re tied to a pole with rope -_-

-sorry but again why continue a plotline that has been tied off? And not continue with the one that was open ended when u cant even get the significant actors for the s3 plotline? Bring daniel sharman into play, medicis over he has the freetime.

-malia and scott breaking up is also stupid bc again they were "endgame" and they had no reason to break up other than the fact that allison was alive again and for plot reasons.

-harrison coming back was so stupid i was so glad they killed him off even tho i guess they never found his body. I was hoping

-are argent and melissa not dating anymore? Its been like 3 months since ive seen the movie so i dont rememeber that but if they arent, why are the writers/producers, whoever, so desperate to break up everything great they had goin at the end of the show.

The interesting parts of the movie were

-the intro

-elis backstory with his dad, except why would u hate derek its literally tyler hoechlin

-and scott having an animal clinic bc i think thats funny

[saltygilmores]

Thoughts While Watching Gilmore Girls, Season 2, Episode 18: Back In The Saddle. Part Six

Part 1 Part 2 Part 2½ Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Really thought this was just gonna be a cute filler episode I could whack off (lol) in like 2 or 3 parts but somehow we're on part 6? My longest review EVER both in number of parts and also in words? (A Tisket A Tasket may have gone on for 10 parts had Lorelai not made me rage quit).

How the hell did we get here? Oh.

Mark my words. I will hunt you both for sport. The only saving grace here is that our favorite pornographic film, Insatiable Cougar Does Her Daughter's Boyfriend, will mercifully cum to an end in about 1 minute and the remainder of the episode will return to pointless filler once more. I just realized there is no Jess in this episode, at all. Not even a counter-wiping scene stuck on at the end. BOO. Dean is confused by this concept of giving Rory "personal space" so Lorelai, of all people, is going to try to explain it to him like he's 5. No, literally, he does not know what "Space" means. Behold!

Absolutely breathtaking. The audacity of Lorelai Gilmore to gently tell Dean that Rory needs "just a little bit of space" after his behavior in this episode that fits the legal definitions of stalking and harrasment (I looked them up, lol). Where does she find it?

Did your parents spoon feed you lead paint chips as a child? How can one person be this fucking dumb? How have your remaining brain cells not yeeted themselves out of your head already?

"I... don't understand."

Rory Gilmore, you are in grave danger. Your mother is so blinded by her DeanLust she is throwing you to the lions (again).

Never ever, Dean. She's going to give you a sloppy beej when this talk is over. L (flirtily): If I was trying to get rid of you, I'd start telling you stories about my family! Har har har! You're soooo funny, Lorelai Gilmore!

L: I'm not telling you this to try to get rid of you, but to help things between you guys. Just try it! Ms. Gilmore, please explain to the court where Rory asked for your help. Just try not be doing a scary douchecanoe for one hour, Dean. I know that seems like a Herculean task, my man. But just try it.

"Wash my car"-stick your dick in my mouth"

What sexual favor is "a soda” code for, as she's asked him twice already (he keeps sounding reluctant to accept, so I am to assume it’s some freaky thing that only comes with the experience of a much older woman, and he’s nervous about his first time).

Whew. That had to be the most overwhelming sexual tension I've had the misfortune of witnessing thus far on my Gilmore Girls hell-journey. I'm scarred. It's going to be imposible to remove from my psyche, stuck there like chewed gum, or like Jess Mariano's sidewalk drawings. And I thought nothing could ever eclipse these levels of sexual tension:

Or one of the many instances of this

No, this one beats em all by a mile. The big difference being that the other scenes make me want to throw up my hands and rejoice, while this scene made me want to throw up my intestines.

ARE YOU DONE?!

The remainder of the episode contains the conclusion of the z plot involving MIchel's mother which I've barely paid attention to.

Michel is mad at Lorelai because she overstepped her boundaries once more, so that's good. Let the hatred flow my man! I need to recruit as many soldiers as possible for my Anti Lorelai Gilmore army. Take your anger a step further and report her to the labor board in Connecticut for her undoubtedly shaky bookkeeping, close down the whole operation, send her out to the streets and Rory into a nice foster home, and you can find a nice job at a real hotel. Am I thinking too far ahead again?

"The lunchbox of the new Millenium." or the RX 2002 First Aid Kit? Which lame-o creation which would only excite the most lifeless of Teens will emerge victorious?

Now here's some sexual tension I don't mind. Thank god. I needed relief.

And another sucky competitor throws its hat in the ring!

Spoiler alert: they are not it.

The part where he finishes these sentences with "including yours" must have gotten left on the editing room floor.

Just another reminder that Madelyn over there in the background invented the smart speaker, and Rory said her smart speaker couldn't be made because no one at Chilton knew how to build a robot, but there's a sign behind her for an invention called "The robotic dissector", whatever the hell that is. They should have had those dudes on their team, because every single person on the RX 2002 development team was completely dead weight except for Paris.

I totally forgot about this other male douchecanoe. WTF is a "hose hook"? And a locker refrigerator? WHAT? I thought these were supposed to be practical inventions? Why is every invention so god damn terrible? How can Douchecanoe Charleston possibly choose a winner? I can never un-know Charleston as Doug Heffernan's dad on one of my favorite shows, King Of Queens, where he had a completely different accent and not the quasi-British thing he's got going on.

The Locker Alarm wins. Grown Adult Man Richard Gilmore take this loss of a high school invention fair, one his granddaughter contributed nothing to, quite personal. In a tired sequence of events that we have already seen unfold many times before and one which will unfold to the extreme in the next episode, something unfortunate but hardly life altering happens to Rory that she takes in total stride while the adults in her life invalidate her feelings and lose their shit on her behalf anyway. If you guessed “Richard is having a coronary over Rory's loss at a silly school business fair and Rory could not care less”, come on down and collect your prize.

R: You've all put in an extrodinary amount of time, effort, and thought into this. Rory's entire contribution to the project was "This is amazing. I want one of these." Richard is not having it and he is taking it up with DCC. I get the sense this is not actually about Rory at all and is really some kind of Old Man Vs. Old Man Personal Beef about stocks and bonds or golf or something.

In what should come as a surprise to no one, I was right about something again 😁 turns out Richard was bored with retirement or something, so his solution was to take out his frustration on Douche Canoe Charleston because he knew him from Old Man Business Land, and he was jealous DCC had a job? And he didn’t care if he humiliated Rory in the process. I have no more room for screen shots and I refuse to make this a seven parter so you're going to have to use your imagination for the last 8 minutes, kay? Rory expresses to Richard that she's okay with the loss and she does not want Richard to bring this up to the principal but he doesn't listen to her. He says she was robbed and he is not going to sit back and let it go! ARGH!! My poor girl!!! Richard complains to the Manager while Rory has to sit back and watch and while wishing Lorelai would just dump her off with some strange relative like Liz did to Jess so she didn't have to be part of this awful family. Richard to DCC: Out there in the real world, there is no way a locker alarm would be a viable business investment! It's a school that should be training children for the real world! Oh, right, a locker alarm is useless, but a lunchbox full of band aids isn't. The only ground Richard has to stand on here is that if the best minds in this expensive school can't create anything better than a "hose hook" and a "locker refrigerator" then indeed, their educators are clearly failing them. If Richard and Emily had raised Rory instead of Lorelai, you know Richard would have been picking a fight with Rory's kindergarten teacher if she came in second place in the class spelling bee. Richard: I DEMAND A RECOUNT! DCC: Richard, this is not the real world, this is just school. This is so embarrassing. Rory should go on and pull the fire alarms and evacuate the school just to put an end to this humiliation. I feel like every time I have stated "I got no problems with Richard" at the beginning of an episode I've been so, so wrong. I'll stop doing that from now on. At Friday night dinner, Richard is sulking in his room like a baby over his granddaughter's loss at a high school inventors fair, and Lorelai GIlmore, of all people, suggests to Emily he should go to therapy, because "there's nothing wrong with getting help". Does Lorelai ever listen to herself? Where does she keep finding the nerve to advise other people to do things that she refuses to do herself? Clean up your own house first, woman. Emily of course responds that therapy is only for deviants, people with multiple personalties, and disturbed people who lick parking meters and think their dogs can talk. And so another week goes by where all four Gilmores push their numerous emotional traumas deep, deep down inside once more where they can continue to bubble and fester. Things aren't looking too good for little Chaz Gilmore, Rory's son, to break the cycle. (I've decided Rory has a boy just to throw the whole darn Gilmore Woman dynamic off its axis and give things a little pizzazz). (but what would Rory name a boy? Please do not say "Jess Jr." ) After hours of sulking, Richard emerges from his room chipper as a daisy asking for dinner, confusing us all. We come to find out that due to Rory's non-contribution to the invention of a Lunchbox full of Band Aids, Richard has been inspired to come out of retirement. That makes a whole lot of sense. Rory recieves a page from Dean on the way home from FND and Lorelai is pleased as fucking fruit punch to learn that her sloppy but satisfying sexual services earlier in the kitchen were enough to convince Dean to reduce his harassment down to one page per two days. Rory states he hasn't "Called or mysteriously appeared next to me" in two days! Lorelai is pleased that he's "calming down"! The bar is so low! Rory is relieved to get some breathing room from Dean, so to celebrate, Lorelai encourages Rory to call him anyway, then when Rory says no Lorelai asks if she’s super duper sure that she doesn’t want to call Dean.

You can keep your corny little froo froo sitcoms where people learn valuable life lessons at the end of every episode. No one ever learns anything or betters themselves on Gilmore Girls and that’s the way we like it.

Lorelai arrives home, late at night, after dropping Rory off at Lane's house (weird turn of events, but OK, I'm sure this is going to be some kind of set up for Teach Me Tonight) to find Dean sitting on her porch, sulking. Despite the fact that this is the second time in one day that he has shown up at her house to wait for Rory completely unannounced, Lorelai does not find his repeat behavior the least bit concerning. Little baby is pouting and trespassing on private property because he really struggled and put his four brain cells to work to come to a conclusion: his repeated harrassment towards Rory, for some strange reason, isn't endearing her to him, so she may just prefer the company of Jess instead of a DoucheCanoe Wtihout A Paddle. Lorelai merely sticks out her lower lip, gives him some puppy dog eyes, and pities this poor dumb creature who she has an unbearable, aching sexual attraction to. Then he walks off into the night, hopefully over a steep embankment into a pit of alligators. Goodnight.

[lord-pigeon]

The thing you're not getting about why genshin is worse is because events are not meant to be the primary source of quartz in fgo. It comes from your weekly log in, live streams, 50 day ten pull, ascending servants to their second last ascension, story quests, free quests and the ten quartz you get from doing ten of them, rank up and interludes and the quartz you also get for doing ten of those, and special occasions like anniversary and new year. If you do ten rank ups you get a ten pull and you can do this in maybe an hour or two, now try grinding a ten pull in genshin. It'll be a lot more time investing and taxing considering you're just pressing buttons in fate. Also genshin's odds are just lower and it bleeds whales way harder by making constellations do more than just damage and they make modern 4 stars suck without them. Yes genshin has a better pity but that isn't the be all end all, you need to get 5 copies to max a 5 star in fate where as genshin its 6 AND 5 copies of their weapons. I could keep going on about ways that it's worse all day long, especially when genshin has way more micro transactions and predatory practices like battlepasses and resin but take that fate is worse is utterly baffling tbh

Oh boy let's get into the math here because this is where the fun begins.

Don't get me wrong, I'll never defend Genshin's dogshit practices, but I have a personal grudge against FGO fans sucking on it when it's literally the bastard of the mainstream bunch. This argument is me pitting garbage against garbage to say which one is stinkier.

This gonna be long so I'm putting this under a cut:

Alright FGO dailies list (I'll use NA for FGO, since Genshin is a global server schedule):

Day 2=1 SQ, Day 4=1 SQ, Day 6=2 SQ and Day 7=Ticket (3 SQ equivalent)

Total: 7 SQ

Needed for a tenfold: 30 SQ

Weeks needed for a tenfold via Log-In alone: 4 weeks and 4 days. 32 days total.

It should be noted that if you miss a single day, it resets from the very start. You must log in no matter what. It might take but a few moments, but note, you have to.

Genshin dailies list:

10 Primos per Comm/action, total of 40, and a 20 Primo bonus for turning into Katherine

Total: 60 Primos

Needed for tenfold 1600 Primo

Weeks needed for a Log-In alone: 26 days total.

Genshin's big detriment is that while you never lose your place, you need to spend time on Commissions. It can be anywhere from 5-10 minutes, which is a bit of a serious timesink. It's a bit better with the Fontaine update but it's still a pain in the ass for those on the go.

Alright, but Lord, that's just raw Log-In, what about monthlies?

Monthlies are the same, since both give you 5 tickets/fates to use. Genshin is at the disadvantage here since you need to spend the stardust you get from summoning on it, but Fate also requires you to spend Mana Prisms. Fundamentally similar, it's just that Fate wins out by the small margin Mana Prisms are slightly easier to obtain.

What about pity?

Eat my ass, Fate's pity system just happened cause they were getting this ass beat monetarily and they gave up and did a base-tier QOL update. Six FUCKING years we waited for pity and its over 900 SQ??? ((330 pulls btw))

I saved a whole year and a half back for Musashi's inital release and I just barely had that shit. And that was events, dailies, so on and so forth. (I got her in three tickets so nobody come at me with the fact I'm just a bitter old bird who didn't get my cute girl.)

While there's the 50/50 mechanic with Genshin, that levels the idea of 180, and that's going to hard-hard pity. No matter what, you can, and will, at least get the character you want.

Now what if we include Weapon Banner, since people assume Weapons+Characters *must* go together rather than it just being BIS and disregarding the completely different game mechanics of turn-based FGO and action rpg Genshin (<bitter).

Weapon Hard Pity is 240 pulls. You get a Fate Point for 80 pulls if you don't get your directed weapon, and you get another one if you get screwed again. Two Fate Points guarantees the next 80 is what you want.

Now, that might equal 420 pulls, but there's a catch few people acknowledge: Soft Pity.

Genshin has a system that, the closer you get to that hard pity, the higher the rate goes up. Therefore, it's not often someone actually goes to the hard 80 or 90. I'm just using the hard numbers as a point.

FGO is a hard pity, nothing about the rates changes from Summon 1 to Summon 330. Plus no guarantee you actually even get something from those 330 pulls--at least in Genshin you get a Basic Banner character who has some measure of utility you can use to make progress.

Also FGO pity doesn't carry per banner, but Genshin's does, so if you get fucked over and wanna wait a few months, you have another shot instead of wasting all of it cause you got close but no cigar.

But what about upgrades? Constellations?

NP-bonuses are rather minor and not as key as say, Xiao C1 or Hu Tao C1, so FGO has the edge there. However, that leads me to the side point of:

Weapons.

Reasonably, everyone talks about how the 3-star weapons suck, yadda yadda. You get so many weapons from the game as welfare that are good and can be used by multiple characters. You don't need a 5-star weapon, just because you aren't hitting 300k a hit doesn't mean shit.

Genshin has a lot more versatility in team building than FGO tbh, since a lot of FGO's boils down to "Do you have Merlin/Skadi/Chen Gong/Waver/Tamamo/Castoria/Support Caster.png" that you can then use with any other character.

Not saying Genshin doesn't have that too with Qinqiu and Bennett, but due to the nature of Spiral Abyss, people have gotten smart about using others instead of just them cause it's a split up team system.

Citation: I didn't get a single 5-star Weapon until Year 2.5 of Genshin. Fun fact, I also didn't have a single DPS 5-star either (all I had since launch was Diluc and Venti), until fucking Cyno came out. I managed to play the game just fine.

Now in FGO NA, I was also there since Launch, and I didn't get my first SSR until the Solomon raids, in which I finally got Florence Nightingale. I was playing the game carried by Kiyohime, Salter, and throwing SQ at revives. And guides, christ, so many guides it made Arknights look elementary.

What about general SQ/Primo flow (the Anniversaries and whatnot mentioned)?

FGO, the year of 2023, had, according to a Reddit post which I can link if people want the source, is: 2571 SQ, tickets included.

This Reddit post involved Servant NP Ascension Quests, Events, Chunked Log-In Bonus, Live Streams, Bond Stuff, ect ect (also, stuff you can't do if you didn't roll them, the post was being generous with people getting what they rolled or had)

That is about 85.7 tenfolds. So, if you don't spend a penny and not miss a day of logging in, the average joe might get about 2, 3 hard pities on who they want. Presuming I'm doing the math right on that.

Genshin, in the year of 2022, had, according to another Reddit Post, roughly 100k Primogems.

That equals about 62.5 tenfolds, or over 620 Fates. Now, tossing that into the system with someone with the worst luck imaginable that wants a character, that's about the same amount of 3 to 4 guaranteed pities.

One might note that the numbers are about the same, and yeah, that checks. However, there's a lot of variables, such as Spiral Abyss for Genshin, and actually having the characters to do Interludes on.

Half-baked conclusion

FGO is a money sink, Genshin is a time sink. They both sink your serotonin. Nobody wins.

Look, I play both, I have grief with both, I have fond memories of both. I wouldn't have a stupid expensive Okada figurine sitting next to a custom Cyno plushie if I hated these games.

But they're gacha, they're both out for your money, it's just that one is just a raging cunt about the whole affair.

Reddit Post Citations:

[wakinguponsaturday]

Almost a year to the day after first asking @its-sixxers if I could print out and bind Half Light (after figuring out how one actually does that), I've finally finished it!!!

She's 825 pages long, has some of the early pages warped from glue, and blood (?) staining the text block, and I am so excited to fall in love with Nines and Mary all over again. Thanks for letting me do this, it's been a really rewarding project and I got a new hobby out of it!!!

Please go read Half Light and everything else Six has written, she is immensely talented. Mary is my favourite character in Bloodlines bar none and reading her story endeared me to VTMB when the game itself did not. Six's Fallout works are also masterpieces, and I haven't checked out her newer stuff with Elder Scrolls but I fully intend to because even if I've never touched a Skyrim game in my life, I know I'm going to adore it too!

More info about the process under the cut.

SeaLemon was an invaluable resource starting out here because I barely know how to sew and I had no idea how to approach the actual construction of a book. I'm gonna plug her right off the bat because she's very beginner-friendly if anyone else wants to learn.

But before all of that I had to format everything in Word! Chapter by chapter I copied the text over from the downloadable PDF from AO3 and would scan through the fic to ensure the formatting was correct (italicization, bolding, paragraph breaks, etc). I'd do this for about an hour at a time over the course of a couple months, until I decided to do the rest of it all at once after one March night at 10PM where I decided to learn how to bind it all, because fuck it, why not. (Answer: I was freaked out about my upcoming departmental talk and this seemed like a good distraction).

Printing all of it just on regular printer paper (don't know if I'd do that again in the future, but it's what I had on hand) it ended up being 52 signatures, or collections of 16 pages (4 pieces of paper) folded in half. Pierced holes in all of those using an awl and an old phonebook to hold the pages open, and then used my old embroidery thread to sew them together. This part took me maybe two days because I was just so damn pumped about it lmao. I also don't have any kind of bookpress to weight down the pages, so I had made due with old textbooks and MCAT prep material.

It stayed this way for LITERAL MONTHS as I gathered all the other supplies - chipboard and brushes from my local craft store, PVA glue online, and by far the hardest part was fabric. I've since learned that you can make your own fabric using book cloth and basically anything you want (if I had known this book would have been coated in red silk I swear) but for now I just wanted to be sure it was something designed for this purpose, as the woman at Fabric Land assured me it needed something specialized. So binder's buckram! Took a while to find something local and the color selection was pretty limited, I was hoping for a dark red or a dark blue but the green was the best they had in stock. Took even longer to get here. And by that point I had enough going on that it fell by the wayside until uh.... last week.

I glued the spine, again realizing that maybe I should've just made my own bookpress but powering through with textbooks to hold things in place, and let that sit for a couple days to fully dry. Ideally it would be flat, but beggars cannot be choosers. Gave her a lil ribbon too.

Not pictured because I forgot, the final text block with black construction paper glued to it to form the inside cover (would probably use something thicker/crisper in the future, something more like cardstock perhaps?). But then it came to putting the cover together! And that was just cutting chipboard to fit and gluing it correctly onto the fabric, leaving gaps around the spine.

Let that dry, and then I glued the text block in and let everything sit for just over 24h, again with makeshift weights to prevent the fabric warping (it's the second book from the bottom).

And then tada! Finished book! (This one's from before it was pressed but it looks the same now)

All in all extremely cool to hold in my hands and I look forward to the next fic that makes me this insane. If I get permission to do The Sun Is Now Fading I might take a crack at that and make a little set! Follow your dreams and one day you too will be able to take notes in the margins of your favourite Vampire the Masquerade fic.

[forestryfae]

man it is SO nice to find a solution to a really shit problem only for 50 other problems to happen

i am completely alone with zero support in a house i hate, doing as much housework as possible so it can be manageable both in day to day life and so its not hard to just leave when i move, and i still am not getting any help getting rid of the stuff.

i have almost no money and i have to pay to take the train to buy food or neccessities and i was dumb enough to not send a letter sooner so i dont know if ill get my money until after christmas or not, i havent bought more than one christmas gift either cus im fucking broke, and i dont feel anywhere in my body that i want to spend time making something for anyone. my brother still isnt done paying me my money back and literally hasnt talked to me since last time he asked for money, my dad hasnt fucking talked to me in ages and the one time he called in summer it was out of boredom to ask when i was gonna visit them, none of my extended relatives talk to me at all so what the fuck is the point there, and my mom is just. a fucking bitch.

i had her removed as a legal guardian, not even on purpose initially but because folkenemnda or whoever sent her a letter before i was able to have a meeting, so she ofc got fucking offended and now has decided sve cant be involved in anything. she cant call electricians, she cant help fix the house, its "too difficult" for her to have to talk to me or my new legal guardian instead of just buying stuff right away, and she told ME to get a new phone service provider. i had to fix that myself. on top of her being, once again, a useless bitch. dont touch my stuff i say, its fucking embarrassing that you have dirty laundry she implies while moving all my furniture around and doing shit to my kitchen while refusing to acknowledge its my house but still treating it like her own, and not fixing the internet again after they unplugged it.

so i have no access to internet besides my last 150 mb of phone data unless i call some guy to fix it, but they wont be here until next year most likely so its pretty much pointless, and if i buy phone data i have to pay. so if i cant get it fixed ill be literally alone for two weeks straight with no people at all around me and noone i can talk to on the internet. except for fucking. christmas. idk about new years eve. and i dont even fucking like my family, i dont even want to spend time with them, they treat me like shit.

the ac doesnt work since mom got the electricians to look at everything but never actually hired anyone to fix shit and now is completely uncooperative. and after they checked the fireplace in that control like two years ago im not allowed to use it, and mom never actually got that fixed either even though shes been in charge of absolutely everything since forever.

plus both heaters downstairs are set to 27c or max and it still is only like 17 or 19 or so, i have an entire room in the house i straight up cant use cus theres no power and no light and 17c in there and its full of stuff i asked mom to take to the thrift store for me 6 months ago. also i cant leave either heater on if im boiling water or washing dishes cus that overloads the entire fucking thing.

and its just like so much bullshit all at once and ive been spacing out for like 2 hours while writing this cus i get so frustrated and upset and angry and sad. its not fucking fair that my parents literally dont care about me, yet im expected to be fucking sociable and call and visit them and reach out. they didnt reach out to me or support me at all when i was a kid, or a teenager, or an adult, why the fuck would i want to deal with them. but if i dont go to visit them on christmas or i point out that hey. youre not really being fair or nice to me at all, hell breaks loose cus i should be more than happy with the crumbs they give me, as if theyre the best people in the world for fucking. calling once every six months or letting me celebrate a holiday with them.

like. im stuck here for 2 weeks, im broke as shit, no connection to the outside world once i use all my data, i very much am still mentally ill even if im better than before i went inpatient. but once i go back ill have to go back to work and i dont have a psychiatrist to talk to and im not on any meds i think i might need and i havent been tested for anything yet, i havent been had driving practice yet, i can barely talk to my support contact, i need a lot more help than i am being given, im not getting the help i ask for when i do ask for it, and thats on top of shit parents and a shit house and two cats i love but am not sure i can keep given the whole thing where im gone for months at a time. and i just. how the fuck am i supposed to be able to keep a job or ever move out or make friends properly or keep a new apartment or house or be mentally stable. its so much bullshit all at once wtf

[anantaru]

hello lovely its ur favourite (DUH) 🤠 i am extremely apologetic for current circumstances, however, the proposal will come underway in the foreseeable future (i am a woman of my word 😤) because i am DYING OVER MY EXAMS MAN HOW ARE U TELLING ME I HAVE 22 EXAMS IN THE NEXT MONTH nahhhhhhhhh at least i get a 2 month break after that best believe ill just be staring at kaeyas face in game for at least 24 hours of that time and ur kaeya smuts FUCK HOW AM I LEGIT GETTING HORNY OVER THEM? skills = unmatched fr fr what a blessing u are to my life they were SO. GOOOOOOOD. i feel like ur writings are the only thing thats gonna get me out of this exam period bc i cried six times yesterday and i just cried 5 minutes ago life is so great man but genuinely dont stress urself out either darling ur posts are so consistent and ill say it again YOU ARE SO HARDWORKING but dont burn urself out ur not obligated to be writing here but you do and we appreciate it A LOT also UR TASTE IS SO IMMACULATE LIKE WHAT?? no bc THE MINUTE I SAW JING YUAN I WAS LIKE smash. SMASH. he's so scrumptious i would let this man TAKE ME. after kaeya does first lmfao but SMASHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH why arent men like this reallllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllll ffs man anyways mi amor im going to leave to revise for tomorrows exam, one down 21 to go and im being so fr when i say 21 now btw like yus this is the situation im in bubye ly U ARE AN ICON A ROCKSTAR A LEGEND U ARE THE MOMENT anyways bae adios <3 also i saw ur reply to someone talking abt jing yuans breeding kink and thats AGREEEEEEED WITH LIKE HIGHKEY AGREEED and kaeya its the men with the breeding kinks man fucking hot also im sorry i write so much its cos im a waffler irl but i hope it entertains youuuuuuuuuuu ur a cutie btw i forgot to mention even if its just ur immaculate personality we see ur 1000000% a cutie i just know it inside and out ALSO OMFG I NEED TO SHOW U SCREENSHOTS OF WHAT ALHAITHAM WAS DOING ON CHARACTER AI I WAS IN TEARS i was just saying bby gyal bc he's a bby gyal and then he started calling me it and i was like ew no stop it i shall reveal the screenshots at some point in time maybe when i have a revision break or smth anyways bubye for REAL THIS TIME 🤣🤣

OOOMG LOVE ABQBQJQWJJWQH IM LAUGHING SO MUCH YOU‘RE SUCH A BLESSING I ADORE YOU 🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻💕💕💕💕😭😭😭 please this is so sweet the way this literally made my entire night you‘re so so cute and i agree so much!!!!! kaeya is a breeding kink champion don‘t even 👹👹👹👹👹👹💕 breeding is on his mind 24/7 he needs it just as much as he requires air AAAAAAA and please the character ai, i love hearing stories about ai conversations they‘re hilarious, if you have some good ones go share i‘m all ears 👼🏼💕

[1028s]

me and i do this again when im 20

nickname(s): hanna!!! jus hanna is fine lmao yeah im not a nickname girl fr T_T just hanna

gender: female yupppp im a girl

zodiac: virgo!!! yes still virgo

height: 5′1 5′3 yay

sexual orientation: who knos @ this point tbh i like girls . but i keep ending up with boy sorry guys this comphet shit really addictive

time rn: 7:39pm :o!!! 6:30pm

hogwarts house: hufflepuff!!! dont ask me this LMFAO

favourite colour: i say i like green a lot but ive been leaning towards blue these days yellow is so cute but . idk all is cool

favorite animal: dogs r nice yes i literally dont care sorry but i like ants

average hours of sleep: like seven maybe six

cat or dog person: “dogs r nice yes” cats r nice too tho but i like dogs god neither

last thing i googled: “attention thank you for your attention” bc i want 2 make a version of the poster abt yuto but i cant find the meme “modern irish names”

favourite fictional character(s): u kno levi from fangirl… hes bf (best friend/boyfriend) material… ummm . . .  chen xiaoxi from a love so beautiful i kin her . and hamlet omg i LOVE him

blankets i sleep with: i used 2 sleep w two but i kept kicking one of them off so i jus use one these days two actually

favourite bands/artists: (kpop) sf9 exo gfriend twice and svt // (non kpop) one direction michael buble frankie valli + the four seasons and the beach boys lmao awwwww . . . carly rae jepsen , twice , gfriend , and sum 41

dream trip: lets go 2 south korea hell yea or or or i want 2 go back to africa or the philippines i need to go back to china or visit ireland

dream job: baker, newspaper editor, early childhood educator, asl interpreter, or jus like general translator for another language idk so cute . i think im gonna be a neuropsychologist hopefully if i get into grad school LMFAO

wearing: radiology sweater and pj shorts! shirt and shortz

age of blog: almost two years bc i made this march 19th 2015 oh my fucking god

url because…: bruh i miss na jaemin so much u have no idea he makes me so happy jus seeing him smile and like i havent seen a recent pic of him in ages like im real sad abt it :( when he comes back idk if i will go back 2 coolboyrenjun or like change to coolboyjaemin lmao i love winwin

go-to ssbb character: idk ive been trying 2 branch out from kirby so i play as the naked ross lynch looking guy sometimes (shelk or smth… shulk i think idk) i still love him

fictional character i’d date: levi from fangirl ok good answer . but i would choose zuo ran from tears of themis LMFAO 

how many blogs do i follow: 568 lmao its like 238 or something and only like twenty are active i think KSDHJDHS

what do i post about: nct and memes idk nothing much just doing my monthly roundz

do i get asks on a regular basis: no lmao only for ask games but regular basis asks seem fun no SLJHSJDHJLS

aesthetic: late night type stuff??? homey thingy sometimes too. like suburban houses w fog and then a pop of smth colorful… idk man what . . . . im a girl who likes kandi and yeah

[a-geo-slime]

I cannot believe how much money I just spent in 3 hours. While at this moment I don't need to worry about spending my money... Wow.

I got a job recently and i finally got my first paycheck(its only 1 weeks worth rn cuz its my first. Its just due to how the system works)

We really needed the money but now we don't (the universe had mercy on us)

So i decided i would get some things

Because ive been wanting a few things for a while but never got them cuz i cant just have my mom spend money on me whenever i want, and thats fine im not mad about it

But its been a long time since ive gotten anything i really really want

Like years

So in my mind there are 3 most important things to spend on

THE SANXINGDUI GIFT BOX

$140~

(I HAVE BEEN WANTING THIS DAMN THING SINCE IT RELEASED. BACK IN FUCKING DECEMBER. HAD IT RELEASED EARLIER I WOULD HAVE ASKED FOR IT FOR CHRISTMAS INSTEAD OF LITERALLY EVERYTHING ELSE)

A meal at a special AUTHENTIC CHINESE RESTAURANT in my state (its a bit far away but i really wanna try it some time)

$60- $100+ depending on what we (2 people out of six who LOVE chinese food) decide to try.

And an art tablet with a screen

$250~

Well i got the gift box set and a liyue geo vision

$228.97

And decided the others would wait till my next paycheck

So i decided

In my infinite wisdom

To go shopping elsewhere

Ahem

Sayweee!

(1) Sweet&spicy cheetos (for mom they are her fav but we cant find them in asian markets near us)

$15.26

~~~~

(3) Pepsi White peach Oolong... (To split between 6 and try) + Free shopping bag?

$11.62

~~~~

(1) Osmanthus cake (im desperate to know what osmanthus tastes like and thought it would be good to try...)

(1 box) calleton taro bread (we love these but cant find in the asian markets near us)

(1 box) Calleton Avocado bread (same thing but avocado. Mom loves these)

$69.63

(they will be a nice surprise to share with family so there's no way I'll regret getting them)

ETSY

Zhongli bracelet

$21.17

~~~~

Zhongli Wrist Lanyard (thing)

15.88

~~~~

Metal planet befall pin

$20.40

~~~~

Zhongli emote charm

$17.38

~~~~

ANOTHER wrist lanyard (thing) that looks like a stone steele

$15.05

~~~~

Zhongli metal bookmark (better one than what on genshin global...)

$15.86

~~~~

Zhongli long sleeve shirt (actually do check this one out. its from "Turotake" im gonna wear it all the time once i get it)

$42.58

~~~~

Geo symbol pin

$15.45

(I'm just obsessed with zhongli and recently broke my phone charm during work (fucking box cutter man) so i wanted some things to try out as charms... Got distracted...)

....

So as you can see

Im as bad as zhongli right now

HOWEVER

i dont think this will become a huge habit

Like i said

Its just been so long since ive gotten anything for myself, and i just wanted to take advantage of the fact that i had a chance to use my new hard earned money for myself.

My next purchases might be a few snacks and those other two big things once i get my next paycheck(and toys but that can wait for a while cuz i have some and dont need them)

Im just astounded at the fact i let myself do this lol. That i even could. Ive never had this much money at once before

That i have like 12 packages to look forward to at varying dates...

Aaaah

I just wanted to talk about this

Cuz i just spent $530+

[terrania]

insomnia hour zero point five: wait why am i not sleeping. why dont i even feel tired what the fuck. cmon ive got social obligations in the morning insomnia hour one: oh my god i hate everything fuck this fuck all of this let me sleep fuck fuck insomnia hour one point five: reality is fundamentally hostile and i am what it leaves in its wake. i want to be awake and i want to be asleep. neither will be a healthy pursuit, you know that? still, I find myself without impetus to get up. insomnia hour two: im conscious im unconscious im conscious im unconscious. not unconscious as in passed out just like... moments where im perceiving the world and moments where i am. not. thats probably where i *should* b able to sleep and fucking yet insomnia hour two point five: fuck everything im staying awake out of willpower now. fuck the night and fuck the day im not even gonna try to sleep. im literally going to play computer games or write or whatever i dont care insomia hour three: wait hang on a second. im normal now. idk why but i can do things now. like not terribly, i dont feel tired again? im feeling less.... rational holding onto this feeling, but it's not unwelcome insomnia hour three point five: heh this staying up at night shit is easy. im getting so good at my computer activities and its only getting easier and easier. im flawless basically insomnia hour four: reality is a set of intricately placed barriers, keys, and locks. a lesser woman could never find the right combination of movements, but with the right give, you can bend the very fabric of being. i am a perfectly tuned machine. insomnia hour four point five: this is great but its not gonna last. my sanitys kinda returning to me, its like im riding a high out weirdly. i'm slaying pussy but somethings coming and im pretty sure that something's the consequences of my actions insomnia hour five: oh god. oh god. oh god. oh god. the dawn will come. i can feel it. i can feel my movements growing more erratic, less purposeful. my trance is ending. fuck, i'm stumbling, im falling, oh god, oh god insomina hour five point five: the dawn is coming in earnest now. birds awaken across the dew-soaked neighborhood, heralding the day as I, something trapped in the night, stand beside them. the world around me is all either dormant and awakening or the trash it discards. I am not meant to be here. I am primed to be discarded. what a beautiful symphony the birds weave with the crickets. neither will take me. insomnia hour six: oh god and as the sun shines upon me it shines deep into every mistake I made to make it here from the terrible decision that lead me to this (didnt take melatonin) to the horrible choice of meeting it. i am nothing and i am not ready for this world. the worst is yet to come though it turns out i also have to experience *this* day's events, as well as the last, and the night's, with no break, while still being nothing and nothing and nothing at all. this is truly the deepest horror, that life continues after the decent, that no line of locks and keys can stop the sun. i am about to pass out

[madewithonerib]

3.] Don't Give Up

Now v.9 “Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time, we will reap a harvest of righteousness. [7:55] 

If we do not give up!

How many of you have read that verse before at the end or had somebody pray that over you or encourage you with that?

It's beautiful, but what's easy to forget is usually —when I read that or when people pray that over me, or you say that to me..

     it's applied to a hard season in life like      hey don't grow weary doing good stay      at it. As a mom/dad, or in your job or in      your Church or whatever — and that's      wonderful

But actually, here it's applied by Paul not to a hard season in life—but to your ongoing fight with your flesh, don't grow weary! Don't give up in the fight

   •  Don't surrender    •  Don't throw in the towel & say it's too hard    •  Don't say it's too much work    •  Don't think the odds are against me

Like no never give up! Never surrender!! Its that kind of a call right? [8:51] 

I'm not gonna do Gary Oldman at all, by the way —if you missed that, it's incredible but we digress

The seven is always a mess up here, I'm so sorry the 10 was fine. He's saying don't give up in your fight against the flesh—for at the proper time it will give you a harvest of righteousness.

If we do not give up..

3.1] Return on Investment

Now this idea that a man or a woman reaps what s/he sows—outside of the Bible is called the law of returns & there are other non-Christian idea again.

This is just a human condition, idea there are other ways to state it:

   •  What goes around comes around    •  Like FATHER like son,    •  You get out what you put in    •  You get what you deserve    •  No pain, no gain    •  Garbage in, garbage out [Karma]

The way JESUS said it was quote:

     Give & it will be given to you, and then      HE said pressed down shaken together

In another spot HE said, "With the measure you use, it will be measured back to you." And more unquote, the idea of the law of returns is very simple & has two parts.

     Every action has a reaction.

This is literally a law of thermodynamics, it's just a reality of the human condition, & to that reaction is often disproportionate to the action.

Now Paul says it to an Agrarian Economy with the word picture of sowing & reaping. Any gardeners in the room? Southeast people? Anything yes!

You know who you are! You know what Paul is talking about.

Very simple two ideas:

[1] Plant a rose seed & you get what? A rose [2] Sow poison ivy & you get what? A noxious weed

And to sow a seed, & in time you get what a little black dot? No, you get a rosebush back, or a hedge of ivy, or a tree; or in Paul's metaphor a harvest!

[or an entire field back in return]

if Paul were writing to our knowledge economy, my guess is he would have said it with the word picture of compound interest.

The miracle of the market! I have this vivid memory from when I was in my early 20's & we had planted our Church & prior to that—I was a youth pastor.

I made minimum wage, I wasn't even a salary, it was like I would turn in a timecard at the end of the week & I think the minimum wage was like seven bucks an hour or something unjust at the time.

And we plant this Church & it was just like a few hundred bucks a month with no health insurance for at this first six months to twelve months.

I can't even remember & finally we're up & running; and you guys start to give & so the elders sit me down & give me my first ever salary. [11:42]

I'm 23 years old & it wasn't much, but it was like okay I'm salaried now—actually it's a big moment in my life & one of our elders was this financial guru.

He ran an investment company.

You would never have known it, he has lived a very simple lifestyle—was very generous, but was a bit of a wizard with money & had been very good with his finances & he sat me down to give me basically free financial planning.

And I remember when he sat me down & he worked out—all right here's how much you need to retire & he said our retirement age for you is 2045.

Here's how much money you need in order to have residual income of 70% of what you make now.

Which means here's how much you have to invest every single month in order to like not live off of your children when you are in your 70s or whatever.

I remember sitting with him & if you've ever sat with a financial planner—some of you that are out in your career now, you remember this moment.

They show you compound interest in a graph what it actually looks like for your life & this is crazy if you've ever seen that graph.

Some of you it's like what a concept!

There's this thing if you look at retirement investment for the first couple decades of your career it does this [plateau] it remains flat for three decades, it goes up a little bit, in the 40s it goes up a little bit & then all set in your 50s—you just become Bill Gates like 10 years!

It's just at the very end. [13:15] 

Compound interest, it's like the same as a population growth around the world or whatever—for a long time and then all of a sudden, the miracle of compounding interest! It just goes like this [exponential]

And I remember him sitting down with me & saying listen it's not about how much money you invest, it's about how early you start & he had some crazy stat.

But you had some crazy stat like you're 23 & if you put in $200/month starting now, you'll have twice as much in retirement, as if you were to put in $2,000 a month when your start when you're 43.

I have no idea if that math is right, something like that—Doug down here knows something, he was one of our elders at the time.

This dramatic number I remember thinking wow & to this day I don't think about it much—but maybe once a year, it comes to mind & I log into my little investment portfolio & I see what I have & it's been 15 years now & there's not much there..

But it's not a retirement, but maybe a really nice vacation. But I don't stress because I've been really good with my money & I put it all the way

I know that's coming right

Now honestly on a serious note—because this is the miracle of compound interest, which is not only a financial reality.

Listen carefully, here's where I tell you that story it is a life reality — theologian Cornelius Plantinga, in his masterpiece of a book on sin

which we have out there on a recommended reading writes this:

     No matter what we sell money or otherwise,      the law of returns applies good or evil; love,      or hate; justice or tyranny; grapes or thorns; a      gracious compliment or a peevish complaint      whatever we invest—we tend to get it back      with interest.

   •  Lovers are loved    •  Haters hated    •  Forgivers usually get forgiven    •  Those who live by the sword die by the sword

GOD is not mocked, for you reap whatever you sell —again followers of JESUS, or Buddhist, or agnostic, or whatever

It does not matter, this is just how things are in the universe—trying to get around this, is like trying to get around the law of gravity!

All that to say [and stay with me here] Paul applies this idea of the law of returns—not to your retirement nest egg—to make a case for why you're to invest in your 20s

He applies this law of return to your spiritual formation & to mine—if that language is new to you, all we mean by that is the process by which we are formed from our SPIRIT, from our inside out.

To become a very specific kind of person, for better or for worse—let's flesh this out, everytime we quote “sow to our flesh” in Paul's language.

Put another way, every time we give in to our flesh & its desire to sin, we plant something in the soil of our heart that then begins to take root, grow, & eventually to yield a character & vice versa.

   •  Every time we sow to the SPIRIT,    •  Every time we give into the SPIRIT's impulse in us       toward love & JESUS definition of life in the       Kingdom we plant something in the soil of       our hearts & then it begins to take root and       grow & in the end to yield a character [17:08] 

Again Plantinga goes on:

      Inside a given human life, the dynamics of       sowing, reaping, & resowing lie behind the       process of character formation..

      Dispositions & acts [by dispositions means       the way you think & feel & kind of move       through the universe & acts your habits,       decisions you make] form your character       which then forms dispositions & acts.

      You see there's a cycle.

      A mere state of mind can eventually swell       to become a person's destiny [Ex negativity       we'll use that as an example in a minute]

      A fuller statement of the great law returns       would therefore go something like this:       [1] sow a thought & reap a deed       [2] sow a deed & reap another deed       [3] sow some deeds, reap a habit.       [4] sow some habits, reap a character       [5] sow a character, reap some thoughts       [6] New thoughts then begin to pursue            careers of their own..

All of you in the mood to do that & reap a habit?

Meaning the cycle begins to feed off its own energy & either spiral out of control into disaster—what he calls destruction or culminates in CHRIST's likeness

The law of returns is the mechanism of our spiritual formation—it is how we are either formed from our SPIRIT out to become more like JESUS.

And in doing so, utterly ourself, or malformed by the world, the flesh, & the devil—to become less ourself & to fit the status quo of our society.

Slavery of Freedom E1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8,9 | John Mark Comer [Galatians 6:1-18]