#its not like you look good all the time or anything haha- COUGHS

[hopelesslygaysstuff]

Hii!

Could you please write about Mommy!Wanda and f!reader using a double ended dildo for the first time?

I love your work thank youuuu

I hope you enjoy this!!! It was definitely a first... I hope it's accurate haha ♡

Drabble beneath the cut!

“What the fuck am I supposed to do with this?” You hold up a dildo, its size causing you to raise your eyebrows. You look toward your girlfriend, unimpressed as it flops onto the mattress. 

“It definitely won’t fit, Wanda.” 

A long suffering sigh erupts from your girlfriend's lips, a fond smile creeping onto her face as she sets down the packaging that you’d ripped open. Making her way towards you, she picks up the dildo that had just arrived, holding it in between you two as she explains. 

“This is a double-sided dildo, sweetheart. We both use it at the same time, remember?” Her voice is soft, and you instantly feel yourself flush as you remember the impromptu purchase you’d made. 

“Oh, right.” Your voice cracks slightly, and you cough while turning away from Wanda’s piercing gaze. 

Your brain helpfully supplied multiple scenarios of using the toy, and you couldn’t get the image of Wanda’s face in pure ecstasy while the dildo was buried deep inside the both of you out of your head. You imagined what it would feel like, your clits grinding against each other as your arousal mixed together while you both fucked yourselves on the dildo, and the thought sent you straight into a vanilla haze. 

“Darling?” Wanda’s face came back into focus, and you blinked a few times. 

“Oh, sorry. Did you say something?” The smirk on her face told you that she knew exactly where your head had gone, and she held up a bottle of lube. You felt yourself grow wet at the sight, and evidently Wanda was just as excited, if her dilated pupils were anything to go by. 

“Let’s break this toy in.”

—

Wanda’s fingers are tight around your throat, her eyes half closed as she rolls her hips roughly. You’re on your back, the dildo thrusting deep inside you with each movement Wanda makes, hands tied to the headboard. 

The privilege of movement had been taken away when you tried to manually move Wanda’s hips faster, and she liked to be in control of her own body at all times. So, here you were, your third orgasm creeping up on you as Wanda slid the dildo in and out of your soaked pussy. 

“Fuck, baby,” Wanda moans, and you watch the other end of the dildo as it disappears inside her. “Can you feel that? Is mommy making you feel good?”

Her words cause you to leak harder around the dildo, and you frantically nod your head. Your brain feels all fuzzy, from both arousal and lack of blood flow as Wanda’s hand tightens slightly. 

“Use your words, darling.”

You try to speak, but all that comes out are a series of moans and half grunts, and Wanda smiles sadistically. Her hips somehow move faster, the dildo hitting that spot inside you that makes you gasp and see stars. A deep pressure rises within you, pleasure coursing through your veins as you try and formulate some words. 

“Please… I need, fuck. You, please. Mommy,” You sound pathetic and you know it, but Wanda absolutely loves it. 

“Good girl.”

Her hips thrust faster, her other hand reaching down and quickly rubbing your clit. Your legs tremble slightly, hips twisting as you futilely try to escape the mind-numbing pleasure. Wanda is nothing short of determined, pushing her own need to orgasm to the back of her mind as she focuses on bringing you to a climax. 

Four deep thrusts later, you feel your orgasm crash over you, your pussy gushing as liquid squirts onto Wanda’s abdomen. If she’s surprised, she doesn't show it, her hips moving tirelessly as she fucks you through your orgasm. 

Eventually, a tired ‘yellow’ slips from your lips, and Wanda slows down, feeling her own orgasm rising with each thrust. 

“Too much?” She asks, working herself closer to the edge even as she watches your face for any signs of discomfort. 

“Yes, but I want you to finish,” You gasp out, feeling your body start to relax even as Wanda slowly fucks herself on the dildo buried in your tired pussy. 

“Okay, darling. Just let mommy use this pretty body of yours.” Her accent rushes to the surface, and you moan at the words. Nodding your consent, you feebly tug at your restraints when Wanda’s eyes close, chasing her own orgasm. 

“That’s it,” You say, Wanda’s eyes shooting open in surprise. “Fuck youself, mommy. Make yourself feel good on the dildo that you used to make me cum.”

Green eyes darken, and before you know it, Wanda’s orgasm takes over her. Her muscles seize, and you lick your lips at her abs as they clench while her chest rises and falls rapidly. Her hand is still wrapped around your throat, the other roughly squeezing your breast as she grinds harshly down onto the clit. 

The last few drops of pleasure are forced from her pussy, the dildo making Wanda feel impossibly full as she pants. She looks down, taking in your shining eyes and parted lips, and feels her arousal build again. 

“Do you think you can give mommy one more orgasm?” She asks, and you don’t hesitate before nodding eagerly. Wanda laughs, her head flung back as she slowly starts fucking herself on the dildo again. 

You watch with wide eyes as Wanda starts working herself towards another orgasm. There is only one last thought you think before your mind completely submerges itself in that vanilla haze.  

‘What a good purchase.’

[not-magdi]

That damm skiing

Summary: Your skiing trip with Lando takes a slightly different turn 

Word Count: 1k 

Warnings: Nothing bad, some mentions of a ski accident 

A/N

Two in a day, woah I don't know what magical motivation fairy visited me but here we are haha. 

Hope you enjoy reading it, (P.S. I couldn’t find a good photo of him skiing but snow is snow so yeah)

Love you guys Magdi <3

Lando asked if you wanted to join him on a ski trip last minute. One of his friends couldn't go, so a spot opened for you.

You and Lando haven't been together for that long. So when he asked if you wanted to join, you politely declined, stating you didn't want to intrude on his friend group.

He agreed, even if he wasn't happy with your answer. But after he told you that you could go with them, you couldn't say no to his sweet face and the excitement in his eyes.

That brings you to where you are right now, cuddled up against Lando in a private chat he rented, chatting with Pietra about god knows what.

After you landed, the group made its way to the hotel so you could unpack everything and head to the ski resort as soon as possible.

The room was beautiful, with big windows overlooking the wintery mountain scenery you were in. Lando flopped down on the big fluffy bed as soon as you unlocked the door.

Chuckling, you let your bags fall to the floor and jump on top of him, sprawling out like a starfish.

"Hmpf, baby get off your getting heavy."

Gasping, you sit up, looking at him with an offended expression. "Are you implying that I'm to heavy for your 'overly athletic body' ?!"

Grabbing your waist, he makes you sit on his lap. "What's up with the air quotes? I have an overly athletic body. Look at me!"

He's gesturing all over his body, flexing his biceps in front of your face, and you could've sworn your mouth started to water. But before anything other than 'heavy cuddling' could happen, you heard Max banging his fist on the door that connects your rooms.

"OI, GET YOUR ASSES UP, OR WE'RE GOING WITHOUT YOU!"

Sighing at the same time, you and Lando get up and start to get dressed in your ski clothes.

You spent the whole afternoon skiing or trying to ski (cough, cough, Lando trying to stop cough, cough). Lando's friends were great. They tried to include you as much as possible, which made you feel welcome.

After a quick lunch and some hot drinks, Lando and Max wanted to ski down the more difficult slopes while the rest of you stayed back, not trusting your skills enough to come unharmed out of this.

"BABE COME ON, IT'S NOT AS HARD AS IT LOOKS!"

Lando screamed up to you. He had the crazy idea that it would be fun to ski the most difficult slope, stating it would be 'really fun'.

After some bribing, you finally caved and started to ski down. At first, it was not that bad, you even managed to pick up some speed. But suddenly, you lost control, and the only thing you saw was white.

Lando watched the horrifying scene unfold in front of him, got out of his skis and ran up to you as fast as he could.

"Baby, baby are you ok?!"

Groaning, you turn to look at him as you felt strong pain surge through your right leg. Crying out in pain, you looked at him with a scared look.

"Lando, my leg hurts so much, I think I broke it."

"Okok I'm calling help. I'm right here, baby. Don't worry!"

Your friends started to gather around you, worried about your well-being.

A ski ambulance brought you and Lando down and transferred you to the nearest hospital after your leg didn't stop swelling.

Now, you were lying in a hospital room waiting for the test results of your x-ray. Lando was beside you, feeling immensely guilty for convincing you to ski down there.

"Y/N I'm so incredibly sorry for that."

Tightening your hand around his, you looked at his face. Now, really noticing his guilty expression, and how he wasn't able to look into your eyes.

"Hey baby, look at me. It's true, that wasn't one of your brightest ideas, but I was still the one who skied down there, so it's not your fault."

Thinking for a second, you add," Ok maybe a bit."

Giggling slightly, the two of you cuddled closer together, still waiting to know what was wrong with you.

It turned out that you broke your leg, not bad enough to need surgery but bad enough to need a cast and crutches.

It was late at night when you and Lando arrived at the hotel. Your friends went back a few hours ago, not wanting to have all the fun without you. He wrote hourly updates into the group chat to let them know what was happening.

They all waited for you in the hotel lobby, not wanting to leave you alone. It touched you as Pietra immediately came up to you, asking how you were doing.

After explaining everything, you all decided to call it a night and discuss the rest of your trip tomorrow as sleep started to catch up on all of you.

Lando did everything in his power to make you as comfortable as possible. He built a literal pillow-fort in your bed, helping you into comfy clothes and prompting your leg up to make you as pain-free as possible.

Even after what you told him in the hospital, the guilt was still eating him alive. He felt terrible as your scared face flashed up in his memories again.

Looking to his left, he saw you typing something on your phone, the white cast looking out from under the blanket.

Sitting back, he wrapped his arms around you, nuzzling his head into your hair, breathing in your scent.

"You ok?"

His muffled voice rang to your ears. Looking up at him, you answered his question with a nod and a soft smile.

Cuddling back into his embrace, you felt sleep slowly taking over your body. The last thing you heard was Lando's voice saying, "That damm skiing", before sleep took over completely.

[mangostarjam]

fuji!! hope you've been doing ok lately :)) make sure to give yourself breaks when needed! treat urself with kindness and grace pls, remember you deserve it even when you think you don't <33

i came by to share my most recent 3am smutty brain rot hehe ;)))

key word: tenting. i'd imagine the kaiju suits have some sort of compressive technology to combat this issue, but yknow what probably doesn't?

(answer: vice captain's hoshina's sweatpants. its something you take unfortunate --or fortunate lmao-- notice of during one of ur training sessions when he decides to shed that half-jumper of his. WHICH BTW!! i fully believe he cut the bottom half off bc he likes taking it off when training, but cant be bothered to remove the whole thing LOL)

pre-relationship!hoshina is watching shortie!reader train and give guidance to the recruits and yknow, watching you fight gets him going and really, he didn't mean to pop one then and there but could anyone blame him when you look absolutely stunning beating the sht outa the recruits?? (i'm 5'1". this is self-indulgence hehe)

okieee love u stay hydrated, make sure to at least eat snackies if not meals, byee <33

- 🧸

hiiiiii friend thank you for thinking of me!! i am trying to take care of myself and thankfully august is almost over so i should be better soon!

i'm ngl this did make me wonder about their suits and uniforms HAHA but i am very pro self indulgence with writing!! gray sweatpants and tenting can absolutely be the death of me and while the uniform pants aren't the same thing, they're close enough imo!! or maybe i just think soshiro's hot in anything (also true let's be real)

this is like 900ish words and not smutty (sorry) but i did have fun thinking about a shortie!reader kicking ass!! love u teddy bear anon thank you for dropping by and i hope you still like this!

You're having the time of your life.

A strange thought to have, maybe, while you're busy dodging strikes and dipping and twirling around your opponents. Being much smaller than most members of the Defense Force means you're used to being underestimated, though your platoon has had enough time with you by now that they should be used to training against you.

They aren't.

You laugh as you swoop past the fists aimed in your direction, caught up in the giddy adrenaline of being good.

Everything moves in slow motion. The rise of your opponent's chest, strands of hair catching the light, muscles tensing for a blow. The sharp red gaze watching your every move from by the fence. You take it all in and blow past your teammates, emerging unscathed from the manned obstacle course and grinning, breathless.

Hoshina Soshiro grins back.

"Laps," he says, glancing past you. The rest of the platoon grumbles good naturedly, but they take off jogging around the track. You bounce on the balls of your feet as your Vice Captain stalks over towards you, hands shoved deep into the pockets of his pants.

"How did I do, sir?" you ask.

"Pretty sure Minase almost caught ya," Soshiro says. "And your form got sloppy at the end. But not bad, I guess."

"Minase did not," you splutter, but Soshiro just laughs. "I swear I'll get a real compliment from you someday, sir."

Soshiro shifts on his feet and you blink, distracted by the awkward way he's keeping his hands in his pockets. He's wearing his typical super-distracting skintight shirt — his jacket is hanging on the fence post — and your gaze pauses on the bunch of his shoulders and the strain of his biceps. Not wanting to be caught staring, you blink and move on. His pants are cinched tight at his hips, but as your confused stare drifts lower, he coughs.

"You get enough of that from the rest of the platoon leaders," he says lightly. "And 'sides, ya still ain't fast enough to get past me."

Sparks fill your veins. You glare up at him. "Oh yeah? Let's go, then!"

"Not now."

You nearly stumble in shock. In all your time under his command, the Vice Captain has never denied one of your training requests. It's led to many late nights in the practice rooms, joking and working together, bits of advice tossed out as he threw you around the room with a strength that made you dizzy. It's surprisingly easy to suppress your silly little crush when Soshiro is busy kicking your ass, but you enjoy the time spent with him all the same.

"Huh? Why not?"

Soshiro shrugs. The movement draws your attention to his shoulders, but that only sends your gaze down his arms to his hands stuffed into his pant pockets. Why is he standing like this, anyway? It's like he's trying to — oh.

Your mouth opens slightly in awe. Your eyes widen. The front of your Vice Captain's pants...

Well, it's safe to say Izumo Tech has some impressive compression technology for the anti kaiju suits. Those things are skintight, molded to your bodies for better kaiju cell synchronization and ease of movement. You've often wondered if it's uncomfortable for people with dicks, since the material sticks so closely. But none of you are wearing the suits right now — you're in uniform, and while the uniform is a bit looser, you've never noticed anything... like this.

Like the thick, unyielding bulge straining against the front of Soshiro's uniform pants.

You snap up to meet his enigmatic gaze as soon as you recognize what you're looking at, but Soshiro merely hums a little. "Ya looked pretty good during that obstacle run," he says.

"But you said my form got sloppy."

Soshiro grins. "Ya still looked good."

Does that mean...? You glance at his pants again and — yup, it's unmistakable. His hands may be in his pockets but there's nothing else that bulge could be, unless he's hiding some kind of secret weapon down there.

"Are you always like this?" you ask. Insubordination be damned — there's no way you can let this go now. Your heart pounds into focus, the lightning quick beat of your pulse drowning out your thoughts as Soshiro snorts.

"Do I get in trouble with HR a lot, y'mean?"

Oops. You're blushing. You're blushing and he's just laughing quietly to himself like your reaction pleases him. "I won't — I don't, um... I don't mind, I was just... wondering?"

Soshiro raises an eyebrow. You gulp as you meet his red eyes. "Am I always turned on while I'm watchin' ya take on guys two times your size?"

You nod. Your Vice Captain tilts his head up, watching birds flit across the sky for a moment as he processes this. "Guess it depends," he says, "this only happens with you, y'know. So d'you want me to be?"

"Do I want you to be...?"

"Interested?"

Your platoon is finishing up their laps, and soon you'll need to take your place among the obstacle course to attack as the next person has their turn. You're running out of time to respond. Your brain is buzzing. The both of you turn to watch as your platoon jogs closer.

"I do want you to be interested, Vice Captain, sir," you say firmly, staring straight ahead but glancing at him out of the corner of your eye. The tips of his ears are pink. "I would be honored."

"It's Hoshina," Soshiro says. He tilts his head slightly towards you and grins at your noise of confusion. "You can use my name while we're datin'."

[nctstar]

idk if u write for tbz but if u do can i request haechan and sunwoo smut pls! if not gamer! hyuck and renjun would b great ILYYY

hi! this is so late I'm sorry :( I don't write for tbz! but definitely for nct. I tried my best with the gamer aspects but I am not a gamer so...ANYWAY I tried my best, what can I sayyy :D hope you like ily too <3

do i seem familiar?

The softness of his lips erupted on your mouth, shutting your eyes, letting him taste you. He slipped his tongue inside, and you gasped. Pulling away, you wanted to whine, beg, anything to taste him again. He brought one hand to your face, stroking the side of your jaw. “What’s your name?”

“_.” Your brain was yelling at you to stop, but you couldn’t help yourself. You leant it, letting your lips passively feel his. “It’s _.”

“Good girl.” That alone would have made your knees fall apart, but you stiffened, sighing gently. “I want to know what name I need to be moaning tonight.”

pairing: hyuckren x fem!reader (no hyuckren ship)

other members: none

word count: 5k

genre: SMUT bro what can i say

warnings: sexual content so minors please dni!! reader is a streamer/cam girl, reader and hyuckren speak in korean and english throughout and sometimes don't understand each other but everything is consensual! mention of breasts multiple times, threesome, breastplay, use of whore and slut, profanity, degradation (not too crazy), dom!hyuckren, bit of thigh slapping, fingering, squirting, being held down + manhandled, begging. oral (male receiving), praise kink, intense orgasms, double penetration, rough sex, crying during and after sex, tiny bit of overstimulation (not really), finishing inside, kissing, alluding to aftercare at the end (very important!)

disclaimer: this is a fanfiction purely from my (filthy) imagination. I don't know the nct members and don't claim that they act like this in real life. I also do not condone any of the activity by any of the characters in this fic. 

a/n: lowkey i think all my smuts are a little bit similar to each other haha. ALSOO the italics in quotations are things said in korean, and non-italics is english, hope that's not confusing.

y_3to3: you look so pretty today baby <3

A flood of messages inundated your screen, aggressively drowning out the simplicity of the one that had caught your eye. Much like a passing quiet comment as you walked down the street, or even less – a whisper of a thought, someone who knew too much, or not at all, the thought begging to be heard.

Your face felt hot under the mask, your eyes threatening to water at the light radiating off your many monitors. The red dot blinked, one, two, matching your heartbeat. Camera on.

“Thank you!” You responded as you fixed your top, a skimpy strappy corset top, your chest bursting at the seams as the old push-up bra did its work. You were suddenly nervous, as if he could really see you. Past all the screens, the messages flooding into your inbox, the red, blinking light.

You wondered what the other men would think knowing you and y_3to3 had met. Would they cry? Wail? Beg on their hands and knees in front of you – in front of him? Would they get aggressive? You hadn’t really thought of that. His handsome demeanour, your soft skin, the way your body just melted under the heat of his body…it was not something you could resist by thinking logically.

“No game today, guys. It’s Halloween! I thought we could just chat for a while!” You fought the urge to itch the strap underneath your right armpit, becoming more and more aware of how uncomfortable the bra was. Smiling through it all, you continued. “Uh, can anyone guess who I am?”

The messages didn’t stop coming, but nobody was answering.

You coughed awkwardly, readjusting yourself in your chair, sneaking glances in the mirror behind your camera to check what you were showing off. Damn, you thought, seeing your boobs pushed together, the pouty pink lips and the doe eyes staring back at you, I look like a whore.

New member. The notification caught your eye. No one had really added themselves mid-stream in a while now, not anybody new, at least.

“Hey, welcome!” Your voice came out hesitant, the same paranoia that always overtook you filling your senses. What if it was your mom, or your boss?

You gulped, but there was a message waiting for you within seconds.

해찬: 마스크걸?

Shit. You didn’t know how to read Korean, only learning how to speak bits and pieces here and there.

“Uh…” You were nervous, not wanting to make a fool of yourself, but also having this sudden urge to accommodate the stranger that had dominated all of a sudden. “My Korean is not great. And I can’t read. But, thank you.” You cringed at the sound of your own voice, and almost wanted to end the stream right then and there. But then, they replied.

해찬: you speak very good.

A weird warmth spread your stomach, and you couldn’t help yourself. “Thank you, uh, I’m not sure…oh gosh, I guess I have to Google Translate your username! That’s embarrassing.”

해찬: my name is hae-chan.

“Oh, n-nice, nice to meet you.” His forwardness took you off guard, mainly being used to men who had never spoken to a woman in real life joining your chat, timidly hiding in the shadows until they got a glimpse of cleavage and couldn’t hold it in anymore. You gave a small smile, one that would please everyone, but also hide something extra for the people you liked and wanted.

y_3to3: he said you’re mask girl. it’s pretty obvious.

y_3to3: you don’t need google translate. i can do it for you. and more. if you want.

Your heart pounded, suddenly quietened by this virtual conversation. Your eyes read the letters over and over again, until the texts rose on the screen.

해찬: yeah, so can i. i just thought she could read korean. my bad.

Your head swam, not knowing how to process all this. One had itched to turn your camera off, suddenly feeling really vulnerable and exposed. That blinking red light kept relenting in the background.

You clapped your hands together. “Guys, it’s kinda getting late! You guys need your sleep, and so does your Mask Girl!” You ignored the men who moaned and groaned at it being only 11pm, and how you didn’t even dance for them tonight, or spill water down your shirt. “Until next time, okay? Stay safe, everyone!” Your voice felt too perky, like it was out of a Black Mirror episode, unsettling and uncanny.

The red, blinking light went off, and you sighed. A million thoughts entered your brain, but they were all immersed in the fog of tiredness that took over your body. Legs moving at their own accord, you stumbled over to your bed, ripping the mask off in the process. As your stomach pushed up on the already too-tight top, you felt breathless as you lay at the foot off your bed, but you closed your eyes, listening to your muscles screaming for rest. “Renjun, his name was Renjun, I think…” You whispered, feeling a little crazy, a little like a witch or a little girl trying to manifest the attention of their crush they looked at for 2 seconds. He hadn’t taken his mask off, but you had felt him anyways. Inches sheathed inside you, thrusting in time with your moans. “Fuck.” How could you want someone that bad? Is this what those lonely men in your dms felt like?

Nevertheless, the memory of the smell of expensive cologne, hands roaming limitlessly on your uncovered body, dragon-like eyes watching you as you fell apart – all of it let you dream restlessly, your body twisted uncomfortably on your bed, your computer droning in the background and the makeup remaining untouched on your face, skincare be damned.

∞

You hadn’t seen his face before today, and you kind of hated yourself for agreeing to meet him again. He was mask-less, and you quickly realised he had a face sculpted by divine forces themselves, sharp, meticulous, perfect. Enough to ruin your life in a heartbeat.

“Hi.”

“Hi. Renjun? I-I’m sorry if I’m not pronouncing that right.”

He nodded silently, and you fought the urge to hold your breath, his skin shone even under the crappy lighting of the PC bang. An awkward silence ensued as your brain scrambled for the right words, not only to say but the ones that would be grammatically correct in Korean. “Thanks for inviting me here. Should we find a place now?”

“Are you hungry?” His eyes searched yours, and you felt the pull you had that night at that hotel room, last night as you read the message, he had boldly hit send on for the world to see.

“No.” You shook your head, trying not to smile in an off-putting way. You prayed he hadn’t noticed the pimple on your face, and your anxiety made sure you were thinking about the fact that you had done your makeup differently every second since you had left the house. It looks good. On camera. Not in person. You kinda look like a slut. But in a good way? Too much blush. Should have worn lashes. Should have worn makeup like the day he felt compelled to take you to a hotel and f-

“I brought my friend. Do you mind?” He looked nervous now, or maybe he was nervous the whole time? You weren’t sure. As you thought of other things, you didn’t process the fact that he had asked you a question.

“Is this her?” You could have sworn you had heard a voice, but Renjun didn’t react to it, and you wondered if it was another voice in your head. “That’s okay, right? Or if you don’t want him here-“

“Him?” Another person was definitely a little unexpected. But you swallowed the little shock you had and tried to reply normally. It’s not that bad. It won’t be awkward. At least he didn’t say she – HAH!

“No, I mean, that’s okay!” Your voice was started to travel upwards to an obnoxiously high pitch, and you willed it down again. “Is he here?”

“Renjun-ah, I already found a place for the two of us. You didn’t tell me she was-oh.” The unidentified voice stopped as soon as the man stood in your line of sight. The first thing you did was use all of your willpower to prevent your jaw muscles slackening and letting your mouth drop wide open.

Holy fuck. He is so hot.

“Donghyuck.” He nodded so slightly it could have easily been missed. Your brain on overdrive at the sight of two of the hottest men you had ever encountered in front of you made you momentarily mute, and it was like Donghyuck picked up on that. Smirking, he looked down, muttering cute.

Oh my god, what is happening right now…

“This is my friend…maybe we better sit down somewhere else?” You nodded, forcing yourself to hum in response so it didn’t seem like you had gone brainless suddenly. You tried to contribute to the visual search, looking around, but your ears heated up at the realisation that Donghyuck was staring you up and down. His black rimmed eyes, whether from makeup or lack of sleep, danced across your body before resting on your facial features, making your stomach start doing backflips. You pointed at an empty row, desperate now to sit down. “There. That works, right?”

“Sure.” The English rolled off Donghyuck’s tongue in a way that indicated it wasn’t his first language, but he was oozing with confidence regardless. You finally met his gaze, fire erupting in your throat as he smirked directly at you.

Minutes later, for some reason, you were seated in the middle of them – Renjun on your right, Donghyuck on your left. The nerves were being pushed aside with a sort of familiar comfort as the game, one you had played multiple times on stream, one you were famously good at, started up. Colours flickered across your shiny eyes as you stared, unblinking.

When you started playing, you might as well have forgotten about the last twenty minutes of your life. Your fingers sprung across the keys, words erupting out of your mouth without permission. At one point, Donghyuck’s character and yours fought for an entire five minutes, both of you getting so close to finishing before swapping over, going at it repeatedly (that’s what she said). At the last minute, you prevailed. You heard him curse loudly as the character fell to the ground, red blinking letters taunting him, filling his screen. “Oh, she’s good.”

“Mmm, she is.” The emotions that had raced through your body moments ago was fighting this newfound adrenaline in your system, and you wondered what to say next. What to do next. Your hands were getting clammy, cold. Your right leg bounced on the seat.

“Again?” You turned to Donghyuck, unaware of the confidence that was taking over. He glanced at you before returning to his screen, rebooting the game. You were getting ready to turn back around, face your screen, when he said,

“Were you mask girl on camera last night?”

It’s like you could feel Renjun’s eyes widen. You were shocked, hairs rising on end. The anonymity that came with your job shattered with dangerous intent, and you tried to shake your head, to deny it. You were never a great liar.

“We hooked up once, Donghyuck. It’s not what you think.” The words pierced you, and you were frozen in place, like someone just superglued you to your seat.

“That’s not what I was saying- Look. Renjun told me what you do. And, you kinda remind me of the girl I saw last night.”

So any girl with tits is a cam girl to you? You wanted to say, but the language barrier and the decency that comes with being in a public place stopped you. And what if I am? Why are you asking me this?

“Why are you saying stuff like this?”

“No, I-“

“Donghyuck.” Renjun’s voice came as a warning, but that was when you noticed Donghyuck’s name on the screen, unapologetically butting into the conversation.

해찬

“Oh my god.” Both men appeared concerned, stopping their bickering. You felt one hand rest on your thigh gently, tentatively. “Sorry, are you-“

“You’re Haechan?” You turned to Donghyuck, and he nodded carefully, dark eyes locked into yours, blank, unassuming. Your stomach swirled with the remnants of the thin instant coffee you had swallowed minutes ago, Renjun’s hand on your thigh stilling your bouncing leg. “I just, well, I didn’t expect-“

“It was, um, accident. I’m not like other men.” You fought the urge to snicker at his endearing broken English, sounding completely like an incel but not intending too. “I didn’t mean to embarrass you. I was just curious. And Renjun told me he had met a cam girl, and, well, it kind of just made sense in the moment.”

You nodded, not sure how to react. You watched as Donghyuck’s hands flew as he spoke, his lips curled in, almost pouting, his features turning almost cartoonishly apologetic. It was so adorable, a stark contrast to the intensity of his eyes, the sharp edges of the hair that grazed his eyebrows.

Renjun sighed loudly, and you felt the warmth leave the middle of your thigh as he removed his hand from your body. He cursed silently, rubbing at his temples. “Sorry if this made you uncomfortable.”

“N-no, no,” You tried to be reassuring, but your voice shook, not for the reasons they had thought originally though. Here you were, your secrets out, quite literally in the middle of two men you had met in person that you weren’t sure if they were thinking the same thing as you – you needed them so bad – the hypersexual nature of your side hustle now glaringly obvious, threatening to break the taboos of a normal interaction. You shuffled in your seat, right leg itching to rest over your left. “It’s okay, um. You guys seem nice enough. Shall we get something to eat after this?”

One thing had led to another. One instance of Donghyuck swiping his card before you could even flick yours out. Let me. Renjun picking up a dessert you had said you liked in your streams maybe once. Them gesturing at your nose, realising the whipped cream had rubbed off. You licking your fingers with satisfaction underneath the white flickering lights of the convenience store. Tastes so good, wow. Donghyuck’s fingers grazing your hips as he pushed past you to open the door for you and Renjun. You pretending not to notice that Renjun was staring at your top, hoodie off to expose the crop you usually only wear at home, feeling embarrassed that there was a stain on the right arm. Wondering if he thought you were unkempt, unorganised. Wondering if that was a turn off…

“Wow, nice building.” Donghyuck’s hair shone as you looked back at him, your Hello Kitty bag slung over one of his forearms. You pressed your lips together, feeling a little vulnerable, maybe even a little scared. “Yeah, I get good money from, well. Maybe I should just quit my job!” Renjun laughed, but Donghyuck was silent, perhaps from not understanding, perhaps thinking about something else. You weren’t sure.

“Um, I don’t really have a dining room,” Your voice trailed off as you looked at the mess in your little kitchenette, the lack of a sofa or coffee table imminent in the blankness of the room. “Been kind of busy, didn’t really have time to…” You were more or less lying, more or less talking to yourself, forgetting that English was probably not the best language to explain things in right now. You nodded at no one in particular, before pointing at your bedroom door. “Should we…?”

Renjun had laughed audibly when stepping into your room, Donghyuck muttering cute once again but just a bit louder this time. You chuckled weakly, but your face started to burn, embarrassment leaking into your veins like a potent poison. The plushies and Sanrio merch made you feel more exposed than ever, and your eyes widened when you noticed your favourite orange dildo resting on the bed, as shameless as a naked lover waiting for you after a long day at work. “Uh, okay, um,” You began to babble, trying to quickly shove away the apparatus and praying it would grow legs and run away while they weren’t looking. “You can sit here.”

You bounced on the bed as the two men perched themselves next to you, you in the middle again. The plastic bags filled with random knick-knacks Donghyuck had swore you wanted crinkled as he bent over, tying a knot at the top. “You alright? You seem…nervous.” His nonchalant concern made you want to melt, want to lean over and start making out with him. What did you want, really? Why did you invite them here?

“Are you waiting for something?” Renjun’s breath tickled your ear, surprising you. You turned to face him. His scent the same as that night. Leaning over, his eyes darted back and forth from your lips to your eyes.

The softness of his lips erupted on your mouth, shutting your eyes, letting him taste you. He slipped his tongue inside, and you gasped. Pulling away, you wanted to whine, beg, anything to taste him again. He brought one hand to your face, stroking the side of your jaw. “What’s your name?”

“_.” Your brain was yelling at you to stop, but you couldn’t help yourself. You leant it, letting your lips passively feel his. “It’s _.”

“Good girl.” That alone would have made your knees fall apart, but you stiffened, sighing gently. “I want to know what name I need to be moaning tonight.”

As if on cue, you felt one arm wrap around your middle, knee nudging your legs apart. You tried to whip your head around, but Renjun stopped you, pressing down on your forehead so your head rested on the back on Donghyuck’s upper shoulders. You whimpered. “Donghyuck…”

“Shh, it’s okay. I got you.” You both adjusted so you were perched on his lap now, staring at Renjun, eyes wide in anticipation. You felt Donghyuck’s hard-on press into the ridge of your lower back. Stifling a moan, you tried to slip up and down his lap, but felt a hard slap on your thigh when you did, your actions failing to go unnoticed.

“Whore.” You whimpered, feeling Donghyuck nibble on your ear, relentlessly but also with a slight care, as if tending to an animal at flight risk. “Take your top off, if you want this.”

If you want this. His words swam in your ears, and both men paused, waiting for you to act. The tension in the air was thick, but also, you realised, fragile, like a bubble of lust that would pop with the right words, if you didn’t consent. They would definitely leave. They would never mention it again.

But you shrugged off Donghyuck’s arms around you, almost drooling at the veins, the muscles that bulged even as he let go. You pulled your top off, one hand behind your back to unclip your bra. You could feel the surprise, the shock, before Renjun latched onto one of your nipples, your back arching and Donghyuck pulling you flush against him again. “O-oh…”

“You think you can cum just like this? Filthy girl.” You weren’t really sure what exactly he was talking about, but you understood cum and whore, and you shook your head. “Want more, pl-, ah, Renjun-ah!” He started leaving love bites down the middle of your chest, another hand flicking your other nipple. You squirmed. “Please, please…”

“Showing off her rack to any man who wants it, Donghyuck-ah, did you know?” You did understand that, and your eyes watered at the humiliation, simultaneously feeling yourself get wetter as you did. “Fuck, I bet she gets off on it.”

You shook your head, but you were moaning too, which didn’t really help your case. “Please, wanna cum, please, no more-“ You tried pushing Renjun’s head off you, to which he obliged, silencing you with a kiss instead. “Tell us what you want. Come on. Otherwise I’ll leave. We’ll leave.” Donghyuck wiped your tears with his free hand, making you suddenly melt deeper into his body, into his strong arms. You breathed in deeply, your bare chest rising and falling. “Mmm, I want, um, I want your fingers, please.”

“Like this?” Renjun buried one hand inside your pants, and you took it as a sign to lose them, the both of you awkwardly shaking them off. He pulled your panties down just enough before pressing his index finger onto your clit, swirling around, making your thighs tremble. “More, please, i-inside!” Your voice rose as he inserted one inside you without warning, your fluids now gushing out, exposing you. You felt Donghyuck move his head over your shoulder, to watch you, you thought. The thought was enough to feed the humiliation even more, not even registering Donghyuck slapping at your thigh repeatedly as you watched your hole constrict around Renjun’s fingers. Moaning, you tried to move your leg away, panties now sliding off your calves and onto the floor. Donghyuck tutted, wrapping his arm underneath your thigh to push it closer to your chest. “Rest your leg on his shoulder for me. Quickly.” You complied, submission clouding your senses. The new angle allowed Renjun fingers to travel deeper, curling near that spongy part that always made you reach your climax when you pressed your dildo against it. The warmth and spontaneity of real fingers was making you shake uncontrollably, tears springing to your eyes. “Oh, haah, fuck! Oh fuck, I’m gonna cum!” You sobbed, whining and trying to scramble away as Donghyuck pressed your thigh to your chest tighter, groaning in your ear as he watched you squirt all over Renjun’s fingers, damp spots sprouting on his pants as you did.

Your eyes were ringing, spots clouding your vision. You babbled incoherently, trying to catch your breath. Renjun pressed a kiss to your forehead, then to your nose. “You okay?”

“Mmm.” you managed to make out, wiping your tears. “Wow, that was…really good.”

“Open.” Renjun pressed his fingers to your lips, allowing you to suck the ends, tasting yourself. Donghyuck’s chest vibrated as he hummed in satisfaction. “Fuck, you think you can suck me like that, baby?”

You nodded, pathetically, like a bimbo, holding your boobs as you scrambled towards the floor. You heard Renjun groan and unzip his pants as your knees scraped the carpet, and you flipped your hair over one shoulder, hands pulling at the waistband of Donghyuck’s pants. He leant back, spreading his knees further apart so you could inch closer to him, one hand sneaking up and feeling the ridges on his stomach. “Eager slut.”

The bulb sprung out, meeting your lips, and you teased his slit carefully, batting your eyes up at him in a way you thought he would like. He raised one eyebrow, but you could tell he was flustered from the way his ears burned red. “You can tease me, but don’t cry later when I do the same to you.” You giggled, wrapping both hands around his thick length. Wondering how it would feel nestled all the way inside you, whether you would be able to feel it in your stomach.

As soon as you opened your mouth, planning to suck the tip first, salty precum already pre-erupting in your mouth, you felt something hard press against your now exposed, soaking core. On instinct, you tried to straighten up through your back, but Donghyuck gripped the back of your head instantly, keeping your face close to his leaking cock. “No. You stay here.”

“Renjun-ah…” A sharp inhale as you felt him push inside, warm and so tight, the inside of your thighs now completely wet. You began to moan, mouth open, letting Donghyuck push you on his cock, shutting you up immediately.

Renjun groaned, throat constricting with every word he spoke. “Take me so well every time. Fuck. So good.” Your moans disappearing, morphing into lewd choking noises as Donghyuck held you in place. Your eyes pleaded with him, and he released you, sending you flying backwards, coughing up a mix of saliva and his precum. He gripped your chin, watching your glossy eyes stare back at him. “Don’t do anything. Don’t even think, baby. This is what you need.” You could only moan in response as Renjun gripped your hips, body flopping down as he began to thrust into you faster and faster. The way your walls constricted around him was orgasmic, nails scratching at the carpet as if it would help you anchor your body. “Fuck, yes, oh my god…” Your moans turned into cries, and you felt your impending climax overpower your body. “Please, nggh, so much…” Your eyes rolled to the back of your head, feeling yourself lose control over your body.

Renjun pulled your hair so you were forced to look up. You squealed, chanting his name like a mantra. “Should I fill you up, baby?” You could only cry in response, core twitching without permission. Donghyuck brought his cock to your mouth again, cock prying your mouth open as you let your jaw slacken. Fully hard now, you gagged noisily. Renjun whispered praises in your ear as Donghyuck thrusted into your mouth, tears streaming down your face at the impact. “Good girl. Go ahead, cum for me. Cum for us.” You felt yourself fall apart, muscles paralysing as you came. Not long after, Donghyuck shot ropes of cum down your throat, swearing as he did. “You gonna swallow, baby?” No energy to nod, you brought one hand to stroke the back of his thigh, knees now sore against the rough carpet. As Renjun pulled out, you squeezed your thighs together, not letting anything leak onto the carpet. Donghyuck helped you up once you released him, carrying you bridal style to the bed, lips meeting yours once your back hit the mattress. “H-Hyuckie…”

“Oh fuck, baby. That’s such a pretty nickname. You wanna keep calling me that?” His eyes were roaming down your now naked body, your lower stomach glistening with fluids. He separated your folds with his fingers as you snapped your legs against his hand. He laughed as you shook your head desperately. “Fuck, wait, I’m sensitive! Wait a second…” Chest heaving, you watched as Renjun walked over to the bed, the outlines of his body now blurry from the tears and post-orgasmic bliss. “How are you guys hard again?”

Donghyuck responded by noisily kissing down your body. Unlike Renjun, he was sloppier, softer, more desperate. You craned your neck to watch him, feeling like you were having an out of body experience. Post two intense orgasms, every nerve in your body felt like it was singed at the ends. Yet, you wanted more. Your hips bucked up involuntarily, making you blush. Renjun pressed his thumb on your bottom lip, signalling for you to open your mouth. “You wanna taste my cock too?”

“Yeah…yes, please, I think…” Renjun laughed this time, stroking his length to its full hardness before pressing the head against your lips. At the same time, Donghyuck tapped your inner thighs, and, like a secret reflex, you let your knees relax apart, hips opening. You felt something unmistakably heavy rest on your exposed pussy, and you looked down to see Donghyuck’s rubbing himself up and down your folds. “Hnghh, Hyuck, oh, will it f-fit?” He looked at you with confusion, suddenly realising you had changed languages. Before you could answer, Renjun grabbed your chin and pushed his hips, letting his cock slip past your lips and fill your mouth. “Shhh. It’ll fit. Don’t you worry.”

“Fuck, noisy girl.” Your moans were vibrating around Renjun’s cock, making him thrust sloppily and deeply, one hand holding your head in place. You closed your eyes, feeling yourself getting filled to the brim, a feeling your tiny dildo could never come close to giving you. “Renjun-ah, she’s gripping me so tight. Fuck. We found ourselves a perfect little whore.” Talking about you as if you weren’t even there, mouth occupied, unable to speak, added to the humiliation tenfold and embarrassingly made you hornier than ever. As Donghyuck sped up his thrusts, the sounds of messy sex filled the room, riling up Renjun even more. Drool ran as far down to your breasts as he thrusted, one of your hands now gripping your boob for support. “You want me to cum all over those pretty tits? Hmm?” You nodded as much as you could with the little space you had, the visual of that almost sending you over the edge.

Donghyuck pressed one finger to your clit, making you slap Renjun’s knee so hard he pulled off with a surprised groan. “Fuck! Oh fuck, please, please…” You didn’t know what you were begging for, but Donghyuck pulled out, manhandling you as he pleased. Bending your hips, he pressed your thighs to your chest, pushing his entire length in as both your legs resting over one of his shoulders. This new position took your breath away, your mouth falling apart into a pornographic ‘O’ shape. Donghyuck’s eyebrows furrowed, and you felt him release inside you. Thumbing your clit, your hips jerked off the bed and you cried. “Oh my god! P-please, ah, I’m gonna, oh fuck!”

“That’s it, my baby. Soak the sheets for me.” With one final cry, you squirted the hardest you had ever done before, clit throbbing as you came down from your high. You felt Renjun gently move one arm away from your chest before cumming himself all over your breasts as promised, pleasured moans and stutters of your real name escaping him as he did.

My baby. You pulled Donghyuck near you, crying in his shoulder as he rubbed your back gently, bare skin against skin. “Shhh, you’re okay. It’s okay.” You felt Renjun pull your hand to his lips, kissing the back of your hand gently as you breathed deeply. “Good girl. You did so well. So perfect for us.”

[bowandcurtsey]

Hi its camellia and idk if your request is open or close-

But if open then i would like to request

Yami,Fuegeleon (idk how to spell 😭😭) Nozel and William with an innocent reader and somebody said some dirty stuff to her and she ask them what it means! Im so sorry to request this if its close! In completely clueless during the night so please forgive me! Dont forget to take breaks,eat daily and drink! Ily have a great day or night! Love you 😘🫶🏻

Hello BBG! thank you for this request hehe! Yes I'm eating enough and drinking enough, ig.

I'm having my off day so I had some time to complete requests again! hehe! I hope you have a lovely lovely rest of the week!! ILYSM too!! <3

Characters: William | Nozel | Fuegoleon x f! reader tw: overall safe. I would say it's still PG, haha! Unchecked works!

d/w: the dirty word (imma leave it to your own imaginations)

William Vangeance

You were on a date, it was William's off day so you asked him casually.

"babe, what does d/w mean?"

William choked on his tea and he coughed for awhile. You seldom saw Will so flustered so you quickly helped him pat his back. his face was red like a tomato.

"Who said this to you?"

"Erm, nobody said it to me, I just over heard one of the trainees say it while I was training with them."

You didn't catch it but William's orbs flashed a tone darker for a moment.

"Oh love, it's... a sexual word. Just forget about it, okay?"

He said it in a gentle tone with a sweet smile, just for you.

The next day at training, William came to oversee the training and made things very very difficult for everyone, even Klaus, who was in charge of the trainees was puzzled.

"Captain William in a bad mood?"

"I'm not sure.." you answered with a shrug.

When Klaus asked his captain, he got a very dangerous smile from him. A smile that told him that he was on thin ice as well.

"well, i think their training is not tough enough, seeing that they can go around running their mouths, don't you think Klaus?"

Nozel Silva

You came into his office one day, telling him some guy at the cafe you were at with your friend and tried to ask for your number and said d/w to you.

Nozel looked up from his work, "Who and where and when?"

You were taken aback that he was this angry. You had to tell him to calm down. It made you even more curious of what it meant.

"It's something your ears should have never ever heard." He stormed out of his office.

He found the guy pretty quickly and carried him out of where ever he was by his collar.

"Never. Ever. Speak filthy things to women you don't know." Nozel stared a hole through him.

The guy was eventually sent to a hospital and was traumatised.

"Was it that bad? Whatever he said? Now you make me really want to know what it means," you asked him that night.

His face blushed a little, thinking about whether he should explain it to you or not, but he thought that you'll eventually know somehow, "it's just something filthy, sweetheart.Nobody should ever say this to you."

"Except you?"

Nozel was blushing so hard.

Fuegoleon Vermillion

"Fue?" you asked him at dinner one day, "What's d/w?"

"I... don't know?" he looked at you blankly, "where and who did you hear this from?"

"Mereo said it while we were on our mission together to some of the bad guys."

"..." Fue looked at you, "you better not learn anything she says, dearie. She has a foul mouth sometimes."

"Okay!" you nodded and beamed.

----

The next day Fue asked his sister about it. Mereo burst out laughing. Then she explained the literal meaning of it to Fue.

Fue almost choked on the water he was drinking.

"I knew it! It's not something good! Don't ever speak like that in front of y/n! she's so innocent!" Fue shouted at his sister

"How should I know she'd take it literally?!" She shouted back, "besides, don't act all innocent, dumb brother! You and her would eventually know it one day!"

Fue's face burned bright red and they eventually fought for a bit until the wall had a huge hole in it.

Fue came back to you that night and told you to erase d/w from your memory and that it was a very very bad and filthy thing.

[littlesparklight]

Are there any good books (preferably non-fiction but idm fiction recs) about Paris and/or Helen you would recommend for someone wanting to dive more into the mythology of each?

Haha you're only getting non-fiction because I'm so picky about fiction when it comes to Greek myth I've barely read any at all. So I'll give you some of my favourite academia! Anything that isn't a book is a paper you can read for free either on academia.edu or on Jstor (the latter with a free account). Or, you know, getting it in some other way just like with the books /cough

Helen of Troy: Beauty, Myth, Devastation by Ruby Blondell - SO good (some reviewers feel the Odyssey chapter is lacking,); it's obviously about Helen mostly haha but Paris gets solid mentions in the first couple chapters and scattered ones throughout. Depending on the edition you get, it might or might not have a chapter/paper titled Bitch That I Am: Self-Blame and Self-Assertion in the Iliad ; I recommend this one too, and it can be read on Jstor.

The Body as Argument: Helen in Four Greek Texts by Nancy Worman - really interesting, especially for the Iliad and Sappho 16 sections. On Jstor.

Image, Text, and Story in the Recovery of Helen by Guy Hedreen - he goes through this really systematically! Obviously, nothing about Paris here, but it's definitely a good look at the part of Helen's story that has to do with her being reclaimed by Menelaos. On JStor.

Helen's "Judgment of Paris" and Greek Marriage Ritual in Sappho 16 by Eric Dodson-Robinson - Sappho 16 my beloved. Anyway, it was a while since I read this one, but I remember liking it, and it goes into Helen as subject. Can be found on Jstor, Academia, or downloaded from the university itself!

Aspects of Effeminacy and Masculinity in the Iliad by Christopher Ransom - If you start reading about Homeric masculinity, you'll very soon notice there often comes a line similar to something like this: "but Paris is not that". And if you want to, like, read some actual exploration of how/why Paris is not that and what that means, they will not provide it! This is where Ransom comes in; he walks through the Iliad and all the ways Paris deviates from normative Iliadic (and general ancient Greek) masculinity. Very good paper. On Academia.

Artistic and Literary Representations of the Judgement of Paris in Antiquity by Cristian Mancilla - this is an unpublished thesis and you'll have to google search for it but it's downloadable from the university. If you're interested in the Judgment, this is where to go!

Euripides and the Judgement of Paris by T.C.W. Stinton - you'll probably have to borrow this book from a library? (I got it second hand from a second hand bookstore not even in my country lol) But it's one of those works that gets referenced very often and laid a lot of ground. Is not actually only about Euripides' versions/use of Paris.

Paris in the Epic Tradition by Roberto Nickel - another unpublished thesis, so google search title+author. If you're interested in a (speculative but grounded in the Iliad) discussion of what Paris' character might have been like in earlier times, this is where to go. Nickel explores (but is certainly not the one to have thought of) the possibility of Paris once having had basically both his and Hektor's characteristics in the Trojan War story.

Some general recs:

Listening for the Plot: The Role of Desire in the Iliad's Narrative by Rachel Hart Lesser - this one is now also a published book! (As Desire in the Iliad: the Force That Moves the Epic and Its Audience.) But having compared them, I like the unpublished thesis a little better, personally (certain sections/discussions I liked very much have been restated in a more restricted way in the published book, or otherwise gets less obvious).

Inventing the Barbarian: Greek Self-Definition Through Tragedy by Edith Hall - This one can fit for a Paris rec as well because Paris is a focus thanks to being the "patient zero" and the prime exemplar of the "eastern effeminate barbarian" which is part of what Hall discusses. Very good/interesting book! Go be a pirate about it or download it on Hall's own site, no piracy necessary.

The Iliad: A Commentary by G.S. Kirk (and other authors attached to the volumes past vol. 2) - if you want a commentary, I really like this one, and in terms of Paris and Helen, obviously checking out the volumes that contain the books they appear in is interesting and useful!

[seeminglydark]

hi! is there are reason that you decided that cassette tapes would be john’s chosen form of physical media? how would john organize his music (i.e., genre, band name, release date) and what would john keep his cassettes in? i can imagine him either having stuff in old shoe boxes or a cassette case that he hand-painted himself!

Yes! It's my personal favorite form of media, I'm really partial to cassettes, i think from growing up in the early 90's when it was the norm, so imprinted on my brain. I love mix tapes, jumping up to smash the record button when my fave tune came on the radio, so id always miss the first 10 seconds haha, my first several cars had tape decks. i love Walkmans, it was such a HUGE thing in my life to be able to put headphones on and take my music with me for the first time. I translate a lot of that nostalgia to john. I always imagine him with his Walkman and headphones, or small portable stereo, in bed with all the lights off except the white christmas lights that criss cross his ceiling, Creaky on his chest, listening to the episodes on repeat.

John organizes his music by How Much he Currently Likes A Band, grouped by band name and then oddly enough by album color. (so if he had several cassettes by say, Social D, they'd be next to each other in rainbow or light to dark.) He does most things by color, he's slower at reading and alphabetizing is a bit of a chore and makes him feel self-conscious and stressed. He doesn't mix music and books on tape, they each have their own shelf. He does rearrange a LOT.

Right again re: shoe box and painting the cases! I actually wrote a little snippet of this a long long time ago that didn't make it into the comic, but you can have it now, under the cut.

'Caro eyes a shoe box on the shelf curiously, its covered in stickers, anti fascism and punk rock bands. 'Can i look at this?' they ask, he nods, his back to them. They pull it down and settle it in their lap, lifting off the top to discover... cassette tapes! Oh wait, John did say Maddie recorded their show for him onto cassettes. There were at least 40, all lined up in the order of episodes. Caro pulled one out, the white paper inside the case was filled in with bright colors and shapes, elaborate images of ghosts and snakes and monsters. They pulled out another. A cartoon portrait of the little blond, violet eyes wide at the barrage of brightly colored spirits hovering behind them. 'Is this me?' they ask out loud. John turns to look and freezes. 'Oh….' embarrassed. 'Uh yeah…' 'Wow the art is so…?' they murmur, pulling out another, this one done in greens and blues with metallics. 'Ive never seen anything like these before?' They saw a lot of fanart, but this was different somehow. It felt more personal. Like the person who made them really put their soul into it, like it wasn't just fanart to the artist, but something really deeply important. 'I…um….' Johns face is bright red now..' um…I mean, you know I dont have social media..' he reminds them softly, rubbing the back of his neck. 'Wait.' Caro looks up, he's so flustered now, shuffling his feet, ears on fire. 'These are YOURS? You did these?' Somehow they've forgotten he used to fill up notebooks with colorful drawings, street art and tagging. Liquid letters and cartoon animals with thick black outlines. 'Sure.' He shrugs and turns away, back to them again, 'I would draw on them while listening, you know. It just felt kinda sad to leave them blank. Maddie showed me some of the fanart online, and the box set of the first season. I can't do the same kind of art, I'm not good like those other people, but…I didn't want to leave them blank, so I made my own I guess.' he pauses. 'I'm sorry…you must think I'm so fucking weird.' 'I don't think its weird…' they murmur looking at the tapes. 'I think its really cool. I didn't know you were such a talented artist.' He laughs, a short bark that sounds like a cough. They put the box gently back on the shelf, and sit on the bed, deciding to spare him. They can see he's smiling though, even if he's trying to hide it with his fist pressed against his lips.'

[bunnypeew]

the air in my lungs - Angel!Lucifer x Human!Modern!Doctor!Alastor part 1

CW: blood, hospital, unknown disease

okay so this prompt literally came to me via a dream,, I DREAMED THE WHOLE THING. I THOUGHT IT WAS REALLY GOOD,,, yeah this is gonna be a multiple parts thing. I'm gonna post it on ao3 as well so as a summary,, all I remember is the fact that Luci has this unknown disease that makes him unable to breathe on his own and also cough up blood no matter what, Yes he is an angel here, its because the world here is populated by angels all the time + sometimes they have diseases that Heaven can not control so they send them down,not as fallen but more as to not contaminate Heaven more idk how to explain it haha, so basically he didn't cause the garden of eden apple thing, but evil still found its way into Earth, only that God has no idea ooooh anyway enjoy reading!!!

Chapter 1 - Lucifer and Alastor

Waking up was painful, it wasn't unusual for him at all. He slowly got up in a sitting position on his hospital bed, he was wearing a sweater and some sweatpants, and his breathing tube was all tangled around his wrist so he made a motion to untie it he then tried to take a deep breath resulting in him coughing out blood on his hands. He was prepared of course he had a tissue box right next to his bed, cleaning his hands he then got up from his bed completely.

It was cold. After all, it was winter there on Earth, it was also 6am, making everything outside and inside the hospital dark. No one was around until 7am, so Lucifer took his oxygen tank and fluid with him and walked.

Everything was quiet, he loved that. in Heaven, there wasn't a single moment of chill since they didn't sleep usually so it was a constant ''you got work to do''. For him, it was awful because he never had time to do what he wanted and now that he got this disease he really had no time to do anything at all. It sucked, sure, but he liked the calm.

He arrived at the big window he usually looked out of, it was dark outside, save for the big lights hanging around, it was also snowing a whole bunch which made him smile. He had seen snow, of course, well the creation of it back in Eden, that's when he first got sick. The angels think that it is a disease contracted by staying in contact with humans since he went down to Eden a whole bunch of times to see both Lilith and Adam, something must have gone wrong by some animal or plant or something but for him, it definitely wasn't because of the Humans.

The funny thing is Humans had no diseases, so they couldn't really give them to someone else just like that! Especially not angels. Angels were pure entities with no possible way of getting sick, but yet they did, not very often but they did.

As he looked out the window as someone was walking up to the hospital he noticed that person had wings, which meant it was an angel. Gabriel.

He quickly took his tank and fluid and started running towards the main door of the hospital he saw him trying to get in but Lucifer gestured for him to stop, coughing really violently from the fact he ran. Gabriel stopped at the second door and looked at him in concern

"Are you okay Luci?,,

Gabriel says softly through the glass, putting his hands on the glass to support himself

Lucifer at that point had stopped coughing but he covered his sleeve with blood, he looked at it with a saddened expression, then looked up at Gabriel and smiled softly

"I'm okay Gabri, don't worry, just don't come in here you know the rules, you might get it,,

he said with a pained face then gestured for Gabriel to leave, turning around and going back to his room. As soon as he got there he bumped into someone, almost making him fall down, he looked to see who it was but had to look up since this person was very tall. It was a man with dark curls, big brown eyes and glasses hanging on his nose. It was a doctor, they did say he was getting a new doctor but he didn't imagine him to look this handsome

''hello??,,

Lucifer said softly, making the doctor look down at him, a big smile on his face which made Lucifer a little bit uneasy

''hello dear, you must be the angel Lucifer! I'm your new doctor, Alastor! It is a pleasure to be meeting you, quite a pleasure!,,

he said taking his hand and shaking it profusely noticing too late that it was stained with blood, Alastor looked at his own hand still smiling then licked it out of nowhere! Lucifer flinched at the action with a slightly disgusted look on his face. What was wrong with this guy??

"okayyyy,, can you maybe let me get in my room tho?''

Lucifer says softly then tries to squish himself past the lanky man only for Alastor to let him go through right after. Luci went towards his bed and sat on it with a little bit of struggle, putting his tank next to it and the fluid back in its place, the bed was tall and he couldn't touch the floor so he let his slipper slip away from his feet and hit the floor, he then tucked himself back into bed and watched Alastor approach him, he had a clipboard in his hands, probably with his last exams and the symptoms he was having.

''so, this is some sort of angelic disease is it?,,

Alastor said looking down at the clipboard, scribbling whatever he was scribbling on the margin of the page

''It's kind of an immune system thing, something wrong with my lungs and stomach I don't know,,

Lucifer said making the bed mattress come up so he could sit with his back on it, to get more comfortable.

''Angelic diseases are odd on their own don't you think my dear? such an oddity...,,

Alastor said mumbling the last part to himself, Lucifer heard him anyway but decided to ignore him. He knew it was odd, angels were creatures of pure light, and they were never supposed to die or get sick, that's how God designed them after all, but obviously, something went wrong. The angels were saying that evil made its way from Earth to Heaven because some angels were hanging out with humans and all that stuff

when Alastor noticed he did not reply he averted his attention from the clipboard to the tiny angel, smile still on his face, now walking towards said angel

"what's wrong my dear, well other than your disease that is,,

he said, even giggling a little at his last sentence, he seemed like such a weirdo, laughing at the most unconventional moments. Lucifer scoffed and crossed his arms, not really knowing what to say. There wasn’t anything wrong with him he just didn’t want to reply to him that is all, so that’s what he did he didn’t reply, again. This made Alastor eye twitch slightly, still keeping his composure tho.

“you’re not going to reply, I see. Well one day you will,,

that sounded like a threat, Lucifer looked at him with a raised eyebrow and sighed.

this was gonna be a long therapy program.

OK SO WOOOW,,, it took me so long to write this,,, literally a month cuz i kept losing interest but now here we have it,,,,,,, its not something amazing and i’m not even sure i’m going to continue it,,, but if it gets a nice feedback i might! thank you for reading :3

[crispplant]

TWST BUT ITS MY STONER HCS FOR THEM I GUESS

guys I don’t know how to make the text a diff color how do I do that. NVM I FIFURED IT OUT

Anyways um my hcs for twst gang on whether or not they smoke b. C I’m high rn & I want to

HEARTSLABYUL

Riddle: u look me in the eye & tell me he hasn’t tried taking a hit at least once. He broke the rules like once when he was younger he’s definitely done it again. Trey & Chenya offered him a hit once btw I was there. I think it was just a one time thing for him tho, he did it once & decided he didn’t like it so he hasn’t done it since

Ace: not a stoner and has not smoked before, but deffo wants to. If u asked him to join a sesh he’d be like hell yeah & then be internally shitting himself bc it’s his first time smoking. Gets the munchies when he’s high (bro would luv Taco Bell btw)

Deuce: somehow I think he hasn’t yet. wants to try it but also a lil nervous abt it idk. would only smoke with ppl hes totally comfy with (ace, yuu, u get it)

Cater: trying to fight off the demons telling me he’d be a stoner but like. I just feel like he Could be ynk. Actually. I think he’s the type to only have hit pens before. I think he has a pen. Bro probably suddenly panics and pats down all his pockets going “where’s my pen”. I mean this in the most endearing way I luv him okay

Trey: also fighting off the demons telling me he’d be a stoner. I thinkkkk……I think he would not be a stoner but he’d be so chill w someone being like do u wanna join a sesh. I think he’s used to chenya smoking so he’d be so good at babysitting anyone who needs to be watched if they get a lil too high ynk. the big brother instinct kicks in & he’s like “okay you need to Sit down” (and sat I will be🫡)

SAVANACLAW

Leona: oh man. Oh man. Leona’s a stoner & I know bc I smoke w him btw. it just feels right ynk idk I just think he needs Smthn to keep him sane at that school and I just think part of it is weed. He shares w ruggie sometimes bc they’re actually bestest friends in the whole wide world obvi.

Ruggie: I think he picks up for whenever leona buys another ounce. He’s like walking thru the halls of nrc w an ounce on him & if anyone asks him abt it he’s just like haha idk what u mean. really only smokes w leona but will always say yes to a sesh if he’s invited. Deffo gets munchies & cooks up some banger meals for him & whoever he’s with. Coughs like a mf tho. He’ll be like choking so bad & leona has to be like “r u good”.

Jack: no. He’d just side eye someone if he smells weed on them. The way dogs do ynk. That’s all

OCTAVINELLE

Azul: no 1 azul hater tries to make hc for azul that doesn’t include being mean to him challenge. Level impossible. um . He um . I think no, he definitely watches the tweels get high & goes what the hell.freaks. but I don’t think he’s ever rlly felt compelled to smoke anyways

Jade: o ya. Ya. Hes so a stoner. I do think he prefers shrooms & grows his own but he enjoys getting high from anything natural 🫶

Floyd: u look me in the eye & tell me this freak isn’t a stoner. He’s probably stoned more days than not esp during class idfk. He gets rlly quiet if he gets high enough tho. He just has many thoughts.

SCARABIA

Kalim: another one I’m split on idk. I rlly think it could go either way. Ummmmm ok he smokes occasionally & gets a lil paranoid whenever he’s high enough but knows how to just 🤫 sit quietly with his thoughts and talk himself thru it

Jamil: stoner. Same reasons as leona I think, he just needs smthn to decompress sometimes. will NOT smoke w kalim bc he feels the need to babysit him always. Probably smokes every night after kalims asleep just so he doesn’t have to worry abt anything 🙏

POMEFIORE

Vil: not a stoner but will occasionally smoke. weed has health benefits but the actual smoke will fuck up his vocal chords if he does it enough so he only does it sometimes 🤫

Rook: no. As much as I want to say yes I feel like he’s enough of a freak to enjoy being sober all the time ynk. He’s probably like *french accent* “augh non✨smouqing marajuanna will dull my senses✨I preghfer to stay aleghrt and awaghre at aull times” idk

Epel: oh this kid has been smoking since middle school for sure. He’s made an apple into a pipe once. Doesn’t smoke as much as like leona or jamil but he’s definitely up there. Vil isn’t super fond of the smell of weed so he has to sneak around outside to do anything (unless vil joins).

IGNIHYDE

Idia: this man has never touched weed in his life. He starts getting paranoid before his first hit. I don’t have much to say abt him I don’t know. Oh I do feel like he’s done acid tho?? Idk. He gets nervous abt weed but he just kinda popped a tab once & went on a journey & was fine abt it.

Ortho: um nuh uh. Can he um….would he even be able to….like..inhale…………..sry um anyways. He is not allowed to do drugs anyways

DIASOMNIA

Malleus: He’s gotten high before but he got so paranoid & then hungry & then he passed out for 12 hours so he’s not fond of it. I think if yuu asked him to join a sesh he’d agree tho. He’d be like “haha. Childof man. Of course I will smoke with you. And nothing bad will happen.”

Lilia: HELLLL YEAH HES A STONER. Oh he’s sooo a stoner he knows his shit too he has like five different strains & he’s like do u want this one or this one or this one. Is so so good at taking care of ppl too. Has been thru it all so🫶would be very good to smoke w if it’s ur first time. Also very big advocate for no peer pressuring. Always makes sure everyone’s comfy & not freaking out.

Silver: not a stoner definitely but he’s probably smoked like once or twice. Probably takes the best naps after. But took a bong rip once & did not have a good time. Too much too fast. The room was spinning & he had to lay down.

Sebek: so not a stoner but has smoked one(1) time when mal did. he got so quiet & in his head & ppl kept being like “😟are u okay” bc he wasn’t yelling. Lilia was good abt checking in on him. He was fine he just had so so many thoughts in his brain.

Ok that’s all ty 4 reading🤞🤞

Anyways remember if ur gonna be under the influence of anything 2 stay safe, stay smart, & if soemone tried to peer pressure u into anything then bite them rlly hard🫶

[landofzero-archive]

Absolute - The Pure Land 7

(Location: Michigan Townscape)

(10 minutes later. On the street near the scene of the fire.)

Jun: GODDAMN!

Damn it, I can’t see anything through the smoke and the crowd!You’re a bit taller than me, right, Ohiisan? Can you see anything~?

Hiyori: What do you mean by that? We’re not that different. What, do you have a complex over being shorter than me?

But it seems like no matter where you are in the world, people gather together when something happens. I guess that’s just human nature.

—Ah, Jun-kun, Jun-kun! Your Ohiisan just got a great idea!

You put on a flashy performance right here right now and catch all the onlookers’ attention while I rush onto the scene! How does that sound!?

Jun: There’s no “how does that sound!?”, you’re still being super reckless towards me!

Hiyori: So are you doing it? Or not?

Jun: Aah jeeze, fine I’ll do it okay!? I’ve trained for emergencies like this~!

Ibara: —Cough cough, please don’t cause a scene, alright?

I want to make it out of here before anyone notices, so it’ll be troublesome if you stand out.

Jun: Ibara!?

Hiyori: Are you okay? As expected, snakes really are stubborn animals!

Ibara: Um well…… Perhaps Uncle was making fun of me, but he grabbed me by the scruff of my neck and threw me out the window while saying, “I’ll handle things from here.”

We were on the third floor, so I would’ve been seriously injured if I hadn’t used a tree as a cushion.

NEGI: “What about Uncle? Is he safe?”

Ibara: …… Yes. Probably. If they’re someone who could take his life with an attack of that intensity, then they would have already died many times over.

More importantly, as much as I would like to help Uncle, I don’t wish to bring harm to any of you—

I don’t want to also be picking chestnuts out of a fire. (1)

For now, let’s evacuate! Yes yes, don’t just stand around and get moving!

Jun: Haha. As soon as he got out, he started directing us.

Hiyori: But that’s exactly what makes him Ibara, isn’t it? What fine weather♪

It’s good that you’re safe. I truly mean it.

NEGI: “……  I’ll stay behind. I’m worried about Uncle.”

Ibara: I understand how you feel, but it’s no use. If I leave you in a dangerous situation, he’ll not only get angry at me later, but he’ll also kill me.

That’s much more dangerous and terrifying. Do you understand?

NEGI: “………

…… Yes. It’s a shame, but a ‘helpless little girl’ won’t be of any use here.”

Ibara: I suppose it’s about having the right person in the right place.

…… Even though I told you all to stay at the hotel, it seems His Highness Hiyori and Jun were searching for His Excellency on their own.

It looks like NEGI-shi was taking care of those troublesome people.

Jun: Jeez, how did you find out!?

Ibara: I was also searching around town for our missing persons, so naturally that kind of information would make its way back to me, right? Is your brain even working properly, Jun?

The tent village at Absolute that you guys were in is considered an untouchable area, so I don’t know what exactly you were doing, but—

………

Hiyori: ? Is something wrong, Ibara? You suddenly covered your mouth and stopped talking—Ah, did you get sick from inhaling the smoke?

Jun: That’s super bad! Wh-What should we do in this kind of situation? Mouth to mouth……!?

Ibara: …… Be quiet for a moment. I think I’ve connected the dots.

NEGI: “Wawa? The building is burning down and collapsing, I don’t know what you thought up but how about we talk while we evacuate?”

Ibara: Right. I spent a lot of time staring at a map of this town yesterday, so I’ve memorized all the escape routes. So, allow me to guide you.

Everyone, please follow me.

Jun: Yes. We’ll always follow Ibara~♪

Ibara: Thank you for that. I appreciate your trust.

Truly……

Anyway, I assumed His Excellency and the other one were somewhere inside a building or underground.

However, in summary, the underground is a large place so I thought it would be difficult to comb through it thoroughly.

Unlike my Uncle, Shaka-shi isn’t a professional criminal. His real job is being an idol, after all, so I’m sure he’s feeling very anxious by now—

There should be a number of security measures in place. In other words, the tent village at Absolute that no one can enter.

He’s also likely hidden underground where no one can see him.

Jun: A criminal? In hiding? What are you talking about? That Shaka-san guy was kidnapped by someone just like Nagi-senpai was……?

Hiyori: Hahaa, does Ibara suspect that Shaka-san is the “true culprit”?

The idea of the person who was thought to be the victim actually turning out to be the culprit has been a staple of mystery plots for a long time.

Ibara: When you think about it that way, a lot of things click into place. I think Your Intelligent Highness understands.

Hiyori: “If you don’t understand, you’re an idiot,” huh? You’re pretending to sweet talk me so you can stir the pot, huh, Ibara♪  

Ibara: Anyway! I’ll be rushing to the Absolute tent village!

Whether the reasoning is correct or not, we can’t just do nothing!

Jun: We’re coming too, y’know~? You’re not going to stop us, are you, Ibara?

Hiyori: We did a lot of interrogating at the tent village yesterday.

Since we know the area and have made some acquaintances, I think you’ll be able to search for Nagisa-kun more efficiently than if you were to go in alone, right?

Ibara: ………

…… There’s no other way. Now then, please come with me.

I’ll feel more secure if I’m there to monitor you, rather than letting you do whatever you want without my knowledge. Fine.

TL Notes:

A phrase based on the fable “The Monkey and The Cat” that essentially means taking a risk for someone else’s sake. While in other countries it generally has a negative connotation that someone else is profiting off of you putting yourself at risk, in Japan it can be seen in a positive light.

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[penvisions]

return the favor {chapter 13}

Pairing: Joel Miller x Reader

Summary: The end of the tunnels brings a short-lived moment of relief, but all of that quickly changes as a sniper awaits on the edge of the city limits.

Word Count: 9k

Warnings: canon typical violence, canon typical gore, panic, fighting, gunfire, ambush, active shooter scenario, active fight scene, threats, casual talk of killing, graphic descriptions of injuries 

Notes: i've had the ending to this chapter written for the longest time and i am so excited to finally share it with you all. i like to think i find good ways to end chapters but this one, whew, it's a doozy and i am HERE for it haha

can't thank y'all enough for checking out my story, for all the attention on ao3 and on here as well! all if it makes me so happy and grateful to be a part of this fandom ♡

ao3 link || series masterlist || main masterlist 

A shuffling sound from above had you ducking without a thought, hand going to the colt in its holster at your hip. You aimed it and your flashlight up, everyone freezing around you as they dared to look up. It was hard to see in the small tunnel, the ceiling still lower than it had been when there were still hatches and pipes lining the walls of the entrance that you had taken down here. There was a rather large crack that stretched out ahead of you, some rubble falling from it as the shuffling sounded again. Joel urged everyone back, tone sharp. There was an even louder scrabbling sound as a result of his order. It sounded like something was moving around above the ceiling.

There was a sickening crack that had you shoving Ellie and Sam ahead of you, trying to quickly get them to further down the tunnel. The ground was quaking underneath your feet, the entire tunnel shaking as you tried to close the distance between the kids and the bits of concrete that were beginning to crumble from the ceiling.

“It’s gonna collapse!”

Henry shouted, trying to move right behind them as larger rocks and pieces of the tunnel started to rain down, using his body to try and shield them from getting hit. As you pushed him forward you felt something too close to you. You felt large hands shove you to the side as something fell among the debris, sending you crashing into the wall, the last thing you saw was Ellie’s panicked face as she shouted out for you and Joel through the cascade of debris before the tunnel went completely dark.

You gasped, trying desperately to pull air into your lungs but dust was heavy in the air. You started coughing, the sound harsh even to your ringing ears. It was pitch black all around you, your flashlight having flown from your hands along with your colt. The sounds of debris settling around you had you flying up from your spot, thankfully not having been crushed by anything large enough to do any lasting damage. You were half leaning against what remained of the side of the tunnel. You crawled away as another large chunk of concrete came tumbling down, hands and knees scraping along the ground.

“Joel!” You called into the darkness, breath shuddering as you were met silence. You were sure he had been behind you, or at least close to you before you had tumbled into the wall. You worried he had gotten caught underneath the concrete, your mind racing as coughs racked your body, gasping as you tried to clear your lungs of dust. It was too heavy in the air.

Heaving, you pulled your pack from your back once you felt safe enough, digging blindly into the ground around you in a desperate attempt to find the colt. It hadn’t been yours; it had been his and it was one of the last things you had after fifteen years. When you couldn’t find it in the space around you, you felt tears sting in your eyes. Completely overwhelmed by the prospect of having lost a part of him, not being able to get a response from Joel, the cave in separating you from Ellie and potentially trapping you within the city, having to backtrack alone and find another way out from under Kathleen’s militia. You didn’t have another second to think before there was a clicking sound followed by a sudden gasp from beneath the rubble.

“Joel!” You shouted again, reaching for the smaller flashlight in the pocket hugging your thigh. You clicked it on in time to see a twisted body crawling from underneath the rubble, twisting its head in an unnatural display. You tried not to breathe too loudly, but it wouldn’t have mattered as you did. You spied a smudge of brown that was moving about among the white dust that covered everything, it had to be Joel. When he started coughing harshly, you felt relief flood your veins but only for a moment. Your heart leapt into your throat as you saw the clicker amble out of where it had been buried and made its way toward him, leaving your precious pack behind on the ground without a thought.

“Hey!” You shouted, pushing yourself up, grit underneath your boots making you trip. Your shoulder hit a large chunk of concrete jutting up, but you just pushed off it and scrambled over to where Joel was stuck in the debris. He was groaning, coming to, making far too much noise as he did so. You felt your foot get caught as you rushed, heart thudding hard as you tried to keep your flashlight on the clicker moving around, it wasn’t as fast as it could’ve been, one of its arms was nearly torn from the shoulder socket, cordyceps slowly reaching out from it and making your stomach lurch.

You heard your name, Joel suddenly shooting up from his spot in a slight crevice as he regained his awareness. He groaned, his back hurt like hell where the large sheet that had been about to fall directly on you had grazed him when he threw himself at you to get you out of the way. You had been too focused on the kids getting to safety you hadn’t seen it. He tried to sit up but was quickly leaning back against the rubble around him, a strangled sound getting stuck in his throat. His noise spurred the clicker on, it picked up speed, the inhuman shrieking filling the collapsed tunnel, and you managed to get your foot out from where it was stuck in time to throw your body over Joel.

He shouted your name, the flashlight having landed to shine the beam up at the ceiling from somewhere in the rubble, lighting up the whole space enough to see. The site of a clicker hurdling right toward him had him scrambling but your figure flashed before him, blocking his view completely. His hands had come up to catch you, to help you, to shove you, whatever he could’ve managed to do in that spare second. You felt the clicker reach out for you as you hovered over Joel, its good hand reaching to claw at the front of your jacket, its teeth snapping harshly as it tried to crane its neck and get a hold on you. You grunted with the effort it took to fight off its hand, kicking out your legs at its body despite the bad footing you had. It managed to get some footing itself among the debris, and it lunged.

You screamed as its wide mouth appeared right in front of your face, hands coming up in a last-ditch effort to keep it away. There was a loud squelching sound followed by the thing screeching so loud you went to cover your ears, Joel doing the same below you. Yours and Joel’s harsh breathing sounded in the air, though everything was still for a second. You pried your eyes open, not realizing you had shut them as the clicker had lunged. It was scrabbling to reach for you still, though it’s good hand couldn’t quite reach you. You looked up to see it had been impaled on a piece of rebar sticking up over where Joel had been trapped. It was struggling to free itself, the ugly sound of its old flesh ripping as it thrashed about.

Joel shoved at you, urging you to move to the side and give him some space to stand. He pushed to sit up despite the stab of pain in his back and the tug of his ankle freed it from where it had been lodged, twinging as he did so. He stumbled as he tried to gain some footing and raised the knife he had freed from his belt. He grunted with each harsh stab he made to silence the clicker once and for all. His shoulders heaving underneath his jacket.

“You’re so goddamn stupid!” He shouted as he rounded on you, scrambling back over to you, your name falling from him in a biting tone. His hands were trembling as he brought them up to cradle your dusty face, fingers tangling in your hair. It hurt when his chest collided with yours and he knocked his head into yours in a searing kiss. “Don’t you ever think of jumping in front of me again! You hear me?”

“I wasn’t about to let that thing tear into you!” You shouted back, pulling him to you as his arms came around you in a crushing embrace. You dug your own shaking fingers into his shoulders, lips bruising against his. Nose throbbing as his own nudged as yours. The flashlight flickered, the space pitch black once again, and the sound of the rubble shifting had you both twisting to see a large chunk tumble down from where it had nearly been touching what was once the ceiling. Muffled shouts of yours and Joel’s names squeezed through the opening that had cropped up.

The flashlight flickered off completely, the thing too worn down to keep operating as more debris shifted toward the top of the collapse.

-

After what seemed like hours of working in the limited light from two flashlights, there was finally enough of the debris cleared to crawl through. Joel had insisted you move through as soon as it had been large enough for you to safely fit, but you argued you weren’t moving until he could follow after you. He was frustrated, still, that you had thrown yourself in front of him. But he knew he was nothing but a hypocrite because he would’ve done the same.

He was frustrated further when you were insistent that your pack was the first thing to make the move through the opening.

You had won the minor argument of there being enough supplies, minus food, for the three of them on the other side to survive off of for days should the rubble give way and you two were caught. You and Joel could handle yourselves, you had pointed out, could find and fight for survival and supplies. While Henry would need all the help he could get if he were left to watch over Sam and Ellie alone. Joel had shut up at your words, a mix of emotions swirling in his mind, but knowing that you were ultimately making the most sensible call.

The second you were through the questionable opening and on your feet, something slammed into you hard enough to make you stumble back. Dust flew to the air at the contact.

“All we heard was the clicker and you screaming, we thought it got you.” Ellie’s voice was muffled where her face was buried in your chest. Her hands were tight around your ribs, squeezing the air out of your lungs. She pushed from you as quickly as she had launched herself at you. Joel let out a loud ‘oof’ as she had moved to do the same to him, her arms not quite going around his form but still squeezing him tight around his middle. “We didn’t hear anything from you until you started hollerin’ at her. I thought you got crushed.”

He hesitantly brought his arms down to loosely return the embrace, his face a weird mix of emotions you couldn’t quite make out. He didn’t say anything, but he didn’t need to. They were blocked from view when Sam suddenly stepped up to you and curled his arms around your waist, looking up at you with tears in his eyes. You felt your heart melt, kneeling down to bring him into a proper embrace. He was shaking, his small form quaking as he tried to sign something to you but couldn’t quite make it out with the proximity. You pulled away a little to see better, he was gushing that he was glad you were okay. Over his shoulder, Henry nodded at you, reaching over to place a hand on your shoulder.

“This was on our side.” Ellie spoke up, having let go of Joel as quickly as she had done with you. The man was standing with a hand on his hip, turned away with a slightly pinched look about him. She was holding out her hand, but you couldn’t see what was in it over Sam’s shoulder. The young boy released himself from you with a shy smile and went back to Henry’s side.

The gleam of silver in her hands caught the ray of Joel’s flashlight and you felt a shuddering breath fall from your lips. The detailed inlay along the handle had you surging forward and bringing Ellie into a tight embrace. She yelped at the sudden move, not having expected you to crush her to your body. Shaking hands came up to cradle her head, the gun wedged between your bodies a comforting sensation.

“Thank you, thank you, thank you.” You let her go to take the missing colt from her hands when you realized your own were shaking. The gun rattled in your grip; it was scuffed from sliding along the concrete, but it was still in one piece.

“I see the way you clean it whenever we have a moment of peace. Figured it was important.” She offered you a lopsided smile, a blush on her cheeks as she realized she liked the feeling of hugging you, of hugging Joel. It felt like something she had only ever had with one other person, it was comfort. She wanted more of it with you both, but she knew that was a dangerous thought. Attachment always ended in being hurt, either due to unspoken expectations or when it was taken forcefully from you without a moment's notice. Joel’s eyes were on you both, a question in his mind that he didn’t dare ask. He glanced down at the broken watch on his wrist before urging everyone into motion once again.

-

The night air was cool on your heated skin as you emerged from the depths of the tunnel. The door that you had entered led into the lower levels of a building had indicated that you could go through one more into the building itself or the one that led out into a parking garage. The stagnant air of the building was marginally better than that of the tunnel, but the cool air of the outside as you walked into the open level of the structure was heavenly. The brisk fall air settling around you and you breathed deep despite the sting to your broken nose.

You had not been a fan of the tunnels, traveling so far underground in such a cramped space. You closed your eyes and took a moment, the rest of the group walking past you and into the open space. You could feel eyes on you, but they didn’t linger. You brought up your hands to wipe at the sweat on your forehead, being mindful not to graze the scab there.

“Do you know where we are?”

“Yep. On the other side.” Henry's words weren't clipped, but they were did have a weird tone. You chocked it up to the way things were progressing, surely he was experiencing an overwhelming amalgamation of emotions with leaving the city he had once called home. Being chased from his home for just trying to protect his brother the only way he knew how. You couldn't fathom what he was going through. While not being one yourself, you could understand how people ended up in positions that demanded they be collaborators. Thankfully, you hadn't been cornered or targeted in such a way, FEDRA needing proper medical knowledge but your QZ not being so far gone as to test the murky waters with demanding too much of you. They had paid you well in vouchers and supplies, certain soldiers looking the other way when you went beyond the walls to retrieve more. It hadn't been for you, none of it had been for you, it had always been about helping people as best you could with what you knew. But you were aware that no everyone was so lucky.

The mood was somber as the group walked through the parking garage, through the last bit of the main city. The streets you were now making your way through were lined with houses, abandoned vehicles parked in both normal spots as if someone had just come home from work and had walked into their home for dinner as well as haphazardly left in the middle of the street in a rush. It was another mark of a panicked time when the world had fallen so swiftly, so suddenly. You were grateful to be away from the denseness of the city, it had been suffocating the second it had turned into more than a simple drive through.

Joel led the way, Ellie following closely behind him. Henry and Sam were a few steps behind her, and you were still on alert behind them. There was enough moonlight to guide the way, flashlights would only draw attention in the open environment, should someone be waiting or watching. A sure-fire way to gather attention you really didn’t want. Feeling the same way about gunfire, you paused and holstered your gun. You kneeled into a crouch as you removed your pack from your shoulders. You felt a twinge in them as you did so, the harness helping to alleviate some of it but not all.

A few strides ahead of you, Joel stopped when he heard the hush of your pack zipper. He watched as you carefully pulled the machete he hadn’t known was in there until he had been looking for medicine earlier in the day. It gleamed dully in the moonlight cascading down, the silver of it clean and polished, well taken care of. He was curious as to how that had come to be your choice of backup weapon, but as you stood and slipped your pack back on his eyes took in the way you twirled it in your right hand. You had a good sense of the weapon, balancing it perfectly with your fluid movements as if stretching an old muscle seemed unnervingly natural. He wouldn't want to end up in a close quarter scuffle with you, you were no doubt faster than it would take to aim and fire a gun.  

The slight muscle tone to your arms made a lot more sense, he mused as he turned back around. The phantom feel of your hands on him, your arms around his shoulders sparking something in him that he quickly tried to shake off. His steps hadn’t faltered but Ellie had noticed his attention on you and looked back herself. She took in the way you were maneuvering the machete easily, as if it were nearly a broadsword one of her favorite comic book characters wielded and she couldn’t help the excited smile that broke out on her lips. She was so going to ask you to show her how to use that.

A patting noise pulled her attention from you and toward the two boys beside her. You, too, had come up to make a line behind Joel. It was Ellie, Henry, Sam, and you. The younger of the boys was signing, trying to quell his curiosity of what happened next.

‘Why can’t we use our lights?’

‘He says so we don’t draw attention.’

‘But no one’s out here?’

‘Someone could be on patrol out here,’ You signed, mouthing the words as well in case your hands weren’t precise enough in your lack of efficiency with the language. You smiled down at the boy, hoping he felt safe being outside the city, despite it being a new experience for him. ‘Just to be extra safe.’

“No. No one is here.” Henry spoke as he signed, a bit of his frustration at still being talked at and told what to do seeping through. You had trusted him enough to shove both Sam and Ellie at him when the tunnel collapsed but Joel was still holding them at a safe distance. He felt like you and him had come to an understanding, the children come first, they are the most important thing. But Joel was still hard to read, indecipherable in how he felt about everything and how to move forward from here. “No one’s gonna be here because my plan worked.”

“So much god damn talkin’.” Joel’s voice didn’t hold any contempt or malice, just mild annoyance. And while you and Henry had come to an agreement with each other, an understanding, that didn’t negate the fact that he needed to learn to be more careful. He still had that air about him that if something small worked out, everything would follow. You had too much experience in this world that contested that type of thinking, though you had always been overtly cautious of things even Before.

“I’m just saying,” Henry pointed ahead to his right. I delivered. Make this right, go down the street, embankment behind the last house and we’re out.”

Joel pivoted in the direction the younger man was pointing to, head on a swivel. You were doing the same, there was a gnawing feeling in your gut, telling you something was off about the stillness and the quiet air about the neighborhood. It almost felt like you were being watched, eyes following your movements through the streets causing your back muscles to twitch and goosebumps to raise up on your arms underneath your jacket.

“So we cross the river and then what?” Ellie spoke up, a cautious almost hopeful tone to her voice that had you looking toward her. You had promised Henry you would help him to keep Sam safe, but she couldn’t have overhead that while loudly playing tag earlier. Joel too, hadn’t quite heard everything, but had to have a hunch as to your thoughts on the matter. You wanted to keep that promise, Sam was too young to be out here in the expanse of wasteland. And while you were sure Henry would do what was needed to provide for and protect him, he was young as well. He had a lot to learn and learn quickly in order to not get taken advantage of or trapped, killed. “Where you gonna go?”

“Don’t know yet.” He cut his eyes toward you, taking in the way you were watching the back of Joel’s head as he led the way.

“Well, we’re goin’ to Wyoming.” Joel’s head turned so fast it was a wonder his neck hadn’t popped. He was training a warning look at Ellie, his eyes shifted to you. You raised an eyebrow, a silent argument that he felt was already futile. Ellie was hard enough to deter, and she had made a friend, a connection that seemed to excite her and make her feel a little more like the child that she was. And if you were to back her up in your sensible, matter-of-fact manner, he was sure he would crumble. Ellie dug her feet in and began the first stages that would eventually break him down into agreeing it was the best move for everyone. “What? It’s a huge state. It can fit two more people.”

“Yeah…” Henry looked to you, wanting to believe that you would hold true to your promise. But he was unsure now, in the open air outside the city. Joel, again, would be the one to make the final call and he couldn’t see you splitting off from him in order to uphold it. The looks you two shared, whether it be to communicate thoughts you didn't say aloud or when the one didn't think the other was looking, and the comfortability between you two was obvious to him and he had only just met you. The way that is was obvious you would both do whatever it took to keep the other safe, to keep Ellie safe. “Maybe we just call this one a success and say our fond farewells.”

“No, he’ll change his mind. Trust me.” Ellie nodded over to you, a cheeky smile pulling at her lips. She put on a deep voice in an imitation of Joel’s timbre, an over exaggerated twang in an effort to capture his accent. “This is how it goes. He like, ‘No, Ellie. Never, ever happening.’”

You stifled a bark of laughter at the absurd expression she made in order to do so, tucking her chin in and scrunching up her face. You could practically feel him roll his eyes as he glanced back at her, not amused in the slightest by her breakdown of how she thought decisions were made within your little trio.

“And then I’m like, ‘I’m gonna ask you a million more times.’ And then she’s gonna point out all the reasons why it would be better to travel-“

Sudden gunshots had you all ducking, Ellie shouting out in surprise.

“Move, move!” Joel’s hands were on Ellie in a second, guiding her by her shoulder to seek shelter behind the car just a few paces in front of her. It was one of the cars that was in the middle of the road, you watched as the rest of your group crouched down underneath the already shattered windows. You hadn’t had time to follow after them after making sure Henry had a good hold on Sam before a second shot buzzed past your head and you had skidded to your knees behind another vehicle. You could see them, but you were on the other side of the street, the cars perpendicular to the lanes that made it up.

“Ellie?” You called, not able to see her. She peeked out from where she was practically tucked into Joel’s right side. She was nestled with Sam between the two men, where the body of the car was largest, to provide them with more protection. She shakily called out that she was okay and let out the breath you had been holding. You had seen Joel reach for her but in the haste to get yourself safely out of sight you hadn’t seen them hunker down together.

A third shot rang out, shattering the taillight of the car that Joel had ushered everyone behind.

“Where the fuck is that comin’ from?”

“Shut up.” Joel immediately demanded. He looked across the street to you, seeing the way that you were reaching up to touch a tentative hand to your left ear. The bullet hadn’t grazed you, but it had been too close for comfort. He turned to raise his head over the trunk of the car, just barely getting his eyes over the top of it to survey the street. As he did so another shot fired straight from the higher story of a house facing down the street. Henry dared to look through the driver’s side window, prompting another loud shot to hit the broken window and shattering what was left of it.

“Fuck. Let’s move. Let’s go.”

Before you could even begin to argue, mouth pursed to open, Henry was gripping Sam by the hand and shoulder, ushering him away from the relative safety of the car.

“What’re you doin’?” Joel’s shout was edging on frustrated, truly not understanding the younger man’s train of thought. The lack of preservation even in the face of what’s he’s already done to ensure the safety of his brother.

“Henry, wait!” You moved to stand but at a harsh glare and click of Joel’s tongue you lowered yourself back down. Ellie watching everything with a pinched expression.

“Getting’ the fuck outta here!” They barely made it a few yards before a shot landed on the car they were running past. You could only watch as they stumbled and skidded, nearly falling on their backs as they tried to avoid another should it follow. Frantically turning back and rushing toward where they had just been crouched beside Joel and Ellie. Sam was tucked under him where he kneeled, the boy curling his face into his brother’s shoulder. Finally registering the severity of the situation, Henry looked over at you and then trained his gaze on Joel, who was leaning his back against the trunk. He peered over the top of it again only to duck back down as a shot landed unnervingly close to where he had just been.

He shifted to lean more of his weight back on the car, lifting his hips to holster his gun. He muttered something to himself that was lost in the tense air.

“Stay here.” It was quiet, like he wasn’t sure it was the right move, or he was worried about how you were going to react. He had just told you to not dive headfirst into danger to save him not even two hours ago, and here he was doing exactly that.

“What?” Ellie’s response was quiet, unbelieving. Joel shifted on his feet, facing away from you and toward Ellie, giving her his full attention. Urging her to listen to his words. He could feel your eyes heavy on his back, knowing you weren’t going to be fond of this plan in the slightest.

“If you don’t move, he’s not gonna hit you. I’m gonna go around, try to get in the house through the back, and then I’ll take him out.”

“But if you go out there, he’s gonna kill you.” Ellie maintained eye contact with him, her face open and earnest, pleading with him. Her tone as firm as his was.

“It’s dark and he has shit aim. Nobody’s gonna kill me.” Joel raised his voice above a whisper, urging her to hear him, to hear what he was really saying. That he’d be damned if someone was going to hurt either of you. Hurt any of you as long as you were with him.

“Then he’s gonna kill us.”

Joel furrowed his brow, knocking his head down to stare at her, eyes glinting with something behind the serious tone he was exhibiting.

“Do you trust me?”

She reeled back at the question, tears shining in her eyes as she came to a startling realization. That for the way that this had started, the gruffness, the snarky comments about his hearing and the way his knees popped, the way he insisted she wasn’t family, knowing that he had other things – other people in his life, she unequivocally did trust him. She nodded. She trusted him to do everything in his power to keep her safe. He looked away, not able to handle how vulnerable she looked, how raw he felt with the exchange. He was a swirl of emotions, some he hadn’t even known were stored deep in who he was, who he had become. But he knew he wouldn’t be able to handle seeing another child being taken out by a gun if there was something he could’ve done to prevent it.

"You good with that?"

He turned to you, wanting to close the gap or to usher you over to where they were. But he didn’t. He took in the way you were leaning your head back against the metal of the vehicle you were hiding behind. Your knees up to your chest as you crouched to make yourself as small as possible. Machete gripped tight in your hands and ready for whatever may come next. Your eyes were closed, mouth open as you pulled in air to even out the heaving of your chest. He knows you heard him, heard his plan to try and take out the person targeting them. When you opened your eyes and turned to look at him, you nodded, letting him know you were going to follow his lead.

"Copy that."

Joel moved to the front of the car and with a final pat on each of their arms, he made a mad dash across the street and toward the house. You watched him as he went, worry settling into your chest. As soon as he was up, you were standing with a shout, machete shielding your head as you hoped to distract the shooter. It seemed to work for a second, a shot buzzing past you before they caught sight of Joel beyond a fence line and adjusted their aim to him.

You bobbed on your feet for a second of thought before you made a dash to cross the distance between the cars, Ellie’s hands grasping at your sleeve the second you were couched beside her. You reached out to offer a hand to Henry and Sam, both of them gripping your other arm as you nestled in between them and Ellie.

“We’re gonna be okay, I promise.”

Shots bounced around you. Loud in the night air. Hitting the vehicle you had just been using as a shield, hitting the one you were all behind. But when one flew through the window and landed too close for comfort in the dirt at your feet, you were pushing yourself up, lips set into a firm line. You felt Ellie’s grip on your arm, her feet skidding on the ground as she tried to pull you back down. You did so, right hand tucking the machete close to you and the left coming up to cradle her face.

“I’m gonna draw his attention away, you’ll be safe, I swear it. Just stay, like Joel said, okay?” It was different than with Joel, the reassurance. You weren’t asking her to trust you, you were asking her to be brave, to hold her own ground while you lead the way. No less important as she grasped that you were willing to do whatever it would take to keep her safe just as he would. She was nodding her head, her fingers loosening their grip on your arm.

You made a run for the vehicle just ahead, a shot going over your head just as you ducked behind it. You hoped it had been enough time for Joel to get up to that higher level in the house. Enough time to sneak up on the shooter, to convince them to stop this madness. Another shot ringing out and then abrupt, heavy silence was your only answer. You glanced over the top of the car, still cautious. Just in case…

You spied a single figure in the dark window, but no shots came after you. You sighed in relief, hoping there hadn’t been a struggle. Joel raised his hand to you in the window, knowing you would only be able to see his outline or shadow but at the way your shoulders relaxed he felt a bit of relief as well. You brought up a hand as well and he let out a chuckle at the triviality of it. The others were looking to you across the distance of the street and you nodded as you spoke to them. You were about to stand at full height when the sound of a roaring engine had your heart beating hard in your chest and fear welling up in your stomach. You weren’t fond of loud sounds, especially when they announced that you were about to be ambushed.

“Run!” Joel’s loud shout was muffled due to the distance, but you still heard the urgency in his voice. He kept shouting twice, three, four more times. The desperation in his voice became more apparent as bright lights flashed from down the street where you had been traveling from. You were the closest, having backtracked in an attempt to get the gunfire to rain down further away from the kids. Engines growled loudly in the night air as a group of them could be seen moving right toward you.

The suddenness of a giant tank of a vehicle with a dozer on the front of it speeding down the street toward you had pushing off the vehicle you were still behind. Spurred into motion by the bight spotlights casting blinding rays across the street and surrounding area. Henry was quick to usher the kids in front of him, spurred into action just as quickly as you. The crash of metal as the dozer forced is way down the street was loud, every thud of a car being hit reverberating in your chest.

Ellie fired a shot behind her with her handgun as Joel did the same from his perch in the house. She was up ahead of you, Henry and Sam ahead of her by a few paces. Frantic, weaving desperately through the littered street.

“Veer off!” You shouted, sweeping your arm to indicate what you meant despite your body tensing as the vehicle was only a few cars behind you. Just as a shot landed to crack the windshield of the impending vehicle, you heard Ellie’s gun click to signal that she was out of ammo. You weren’t sure if it was one of her hits or Joel’s from the house at the head of the street, but she went tumbling down just a few paces further. Picking up speed despite the burn in your legs you jutted the handle of the machete into your belt, the blade facing down and away from you, the length of it lining up with your left leg. You reached down and pulled Ellie up by her bag, but the vehicle skidding around as it lost speed had her crawling away.

Without thinking you folded your body over her to shield her.

There was a loud splintering of wood and metal as the vehicle veered off the road completely and into one of the abandoned houses. Trucks and jeeps were quickly filled up the street in its absence to make a barricade, the blinding lights on top of them making it hard for you to see straight. The spots of light decorating your vision even as you diverted your gaze. You were pulling Ellie up, ushering her to move but she was nearly frozen in fear and panic. Your hands were rough on her as you dragged her a few steps before lifting her in your arms completely. She wasn’t much smaller than you so it was a struggle, her body held tight to you as you tried to move as quickly as possible from the people emerging from the vehicles.

The sounds of the doors slamming shut behind them and the crunch of their feet on the ground seemed to shake her out of her stupor. She stumbled as she regained feeling in her legs and tried to get a foot down on the ground, her hands gripping your arms and back tightly as you had to cradle her nearly bridal style in your arms. You tried to help her right herself but kept moving at the same time and she tripped, sending you both tumbling to the ground.

“Shit! I’m so sorry!” She cried out. You both gripped each other as you managed to get back up on your feet, you pulled her along, letting her know it was okay. She was okay, she was going to be okay. A few more paces was all the distance you managed before an explosion lit up the street. The sound of it deafening, the brightness of yellow and orange blinding as it reached high into the sky where the large vehicle with the dozer had settled halfway into a house. You threw yourself over Ellie again, both of you hitting the ground on pure instinct. Pieces of debris rained down all around you, some of it still on fire. Smoke billowed up and filled the air.

You coughed as you lifted off her a bit, getting onto your hands and knees to hover over her where she began to shift. She was sucking in air, having been winded from the fall. Everything was still as a fire raged far too close for comfort. The street was littered with smaller fires, mostly debris but some bushes were going up in flames as well, adding more smoke to the air.

Footsteps were approaching you, some from up ahead and some from where the vehicles had come to a screeching halt just a few yards behind you. Hands were suddenly on you, but they were accompanied by a friendly voice.

“You guys okay?” Henry was kneeling down, hands checking you both for any injuries.

“Yeah.” Was all Ellie managed before you were hauling her up again and shoving her at Henry, the two stumbled at your rough treatment and were about to ask what was wrong when they looked up to see your back to them and your machete raised. The gleam of it was threatening in the light of the fire all around.

“Get her the fuck out of here.” Your voice was low, tempered into a warning. But it wasn’t aimed at them. You didn’t glance back at them as they noticed the three figures ahead of you and retreated.

As soon as one of the figures moved to go after them, a shot ringing through the air from their handgun, you lunged. You didn’t think twice before bringing your blade down on their arm, severing it at the elbow and quickly silencing their screams with a second swipe to their chest. The other two figures fanned out and tried to surround you, but the part of the street you were on was too crowded with cars and flaming debris.

You shifted on your feet, turning the blades handle in your hand in anticipation. They were afraid to fire on you as if they were low on ammo and needed to be more cautious about its usage. Something you were going to use to your advantage. You took a measured step toward them, both of them stepping back to keep the same distance.

“You don’t even know me.”

“We know you killed our people.”

“Your people attacked mine. We were just trying to pass through.”

“This is our city.”

“Your city is shit, wouldn’t recommend it.” They closed in on you at once, one on your right side and one on your front. They both fired but you were more suited for close range and ducked. Surging forward you moved in a wide sweep, blade aimed down toward their legs, shouts falling from them as slices blossomed on their skin. It was a blurring of gunfire and metallic tashikaze that sounded in the air before the two figures dropped to the ground. Not wasting another second, you took off down the street and ducked behind a vehicle, skidding to a halt on your knees in your haste.

“He’s up there.” The shadow of a large man spoke, seeming to be the lead of the second wave of people that emerged from the line of vehicles and began to advance down the street. You looked up over the hood of the car you were behind, spying on Henry peeking over the trunk of one on the other side of the street. You didn’t like being so far from them, but it was good you weren’t all grouped together. It meant that at least some of you would be able to get out of this. It was not a good situation, they knew where Joel was, by himself up in that house. They knew where you had scurried too, surely the general vicinity, through the smoke. But they hadn’t seen where Henry had retrieved too with the kids.

“Two and two! Around the back, take him out!”

“Dead end, Henry.” A high-pitched voice announced, so confident in their observation. “Gonna step on out? Save us some time?”

You could hear as well as see the shadows of people advancing down the street, the group led by the large figure’s orders having dipped around off the street toward Joel. Now it was a woman who led a smattering of people, her frame getting closer and closer. Her voice was in a pitch that grated on your ears, too sweet for the words and venom she was spitting out. You could only assume it was Kathleen.

You lowered yourself to the ground in a crouch, peering underneath the car to get a look at the situation. Kathleen was standing in the middle of the street, gun in her hand but down by her hip, not up and ready to fire. She was an average looking woman, probably close to your age, stockier than her voice sweet voice alluded to. She was in a pair of loose jeans and a zipped-up jacket that you would bet was concealing a bullet proof vest. Her dark hair was pulled back in a braided updo that trailed between her shoulders. The large figure from earlier was beside her. He was a tall man, sturdy looking with his wide chest and thick legs covered in protective gear. His silver white hair was straight as it fell to his shoulders, his full beard much the same color. He was on guard with a rifle pulled up to rest on one shoulder, ready to shoot anyone who came close to Kathleen.

“That’s alright. Doesn’t matter.”

“I’ll come out.” Henry’s voice was loud, though you could hear a slight waver to it even across the street from where he was tucked. You straightened up at his words, no longer crouching low but ready to reveal yourself to give him the opportunity to take the kids and run. “Just let the kids go!”

“No. Sorry. The girl is with the couple who killed Bryan. And Sam…” Kathleen came to a stop in the middle of the street, just in front of your hiding spot. You tried to keep your breathing even so as to not give it away, but there was still a lot of smoke in the air that was making it hard to temper. You heard the crunch of steps followed by the hush of grass against fabric. “Well, Sam’s with you.”

“You don’t understand!”

“But I do.” She sounded as if she was merely having a discussion, not actively hunting down and cornering people to execute them in revenge. “I know why you did what you did. But did you ever stop to think that maybe he was supposed to die?”

“He’s just a fucking kid!” Henry was no doubt seething, you certainly were. How could this woman stand here after managing to successfully free her city and immediately put it all on the line for revenge? You were so caught up in your thoughts and trying to figure out the best way to give Henry a chance to get away when you heard a boot scuff behind you.

“Well, kids die, Henry. They die all the time. You think the world revolves around him? That he’s worth…everything? Well, this is what happens when you fuck with fate.”

You could barely make out what she was saying as the butt of a rifle came down hard between your shoulders. You spun around, standing quickly despite the pain fanning out along your back and prickling in your shoulders. Machete coming up and out to catch the man’s forearm where his shirt sleeve was rolled up. He hissed at the sting as blood dripped down to the ground before swinging the rifle out and knocking the blade from your hand.

As soon as it was flying through the air you reached for the colt safely tucked into its holster and aimed at the man’s leg, hoping to down him. When it jammed, you swore. He descended on you, the rifle was slung over his shoulder, and he was hauling you up by your hair. His large hands were rough as he gripped your loose hair tight in his fist, the other coming to wrangle the colt out of your own.

“Nice try, sweetheart, but we got you outnumbered.” His voice was smooth as he had you standing, your legs kicking out at him in an attempt to free yourself.

“Get your fuckin’ hands off me!” Your shout was loud even from behind the car, cutting off the conversation between Kathleen and Henry.

Joel dared to take his eyes off Ellie to search for your figure, the desperation in your voice enough to make his entire body go numb. He had lost you in the haze of smoke, in the frantic aftermath of you taking out that trio of people. He had seen you run closer to where he was but had lost track when you had ducked behind a car. His eyes found you again, gripped tight in the hold of a tall man. He was dragging you by your hair from around where you had been seeking safety, arms up to encompass his to try and loosen his grip, legs kicking up dust as you struggled to try and get footing on the ground. He was easily more than a foot taller than you and about a hundred pounds heavier. There was no way you could get free with just your bare hands, especially with the way he dragged you behind him as he walked briskly back to Kathleen’s side. He felt himself tense, a feeling of dread settling heavy in his middle, as he noticed there was no gun in your holster and the machete was nowhere to be seen.

“If we hurt her, it’ll draw the man out. Then we can end some of this.” Kathleen’s sickly-sweet voice sounded close to you, the gun she aimed at you not stopping you from continuing to try and fight out of the grip on you. You were confident that you could tackle her and take her out just before a bullet would find it's home in your skin. Joel felt his grip tighten on the rifle he held, daring to move in front of the window. He wouldn’t be able to land a hit without putting you at risk, the man was so close to you, and you were thrashing about too frantically. It was too risky, even if all he wanted to do was shoot the motherfucker dead. “Perry, restrain her.”

You tried to fight against the strong arms that came around you. Perry was crouching down, his grip still tight in your hair and forced you on your back. The force of you hitting the ground hurt, but you continued to struggle, not liking the how easily the man was throttling you about. He released the grip on your hair to pull both your hands in front of you, holding them steady while he patted you down for weapons. Some of the people gathered around her started to share looks with each other, unsure if they agreed once you had started shouting. You hadn’t personally done anything to them. It was one thing to go after the man who sold out her brother.

“No, no, no!” The man’s hands were rough on you. Your voice angry at being handled, Joel felt his knuckles crack around the rifle as he could do nothing but watch from above. Perry was hauling you up a bit to reach into the holster and make sure it was empty, his hands coming up to your chest and feeling around for where the harness was concealing your second gun. When his hand brushed underneath your chest, the callouses of his fingertips finding it, the fabric of his gloves rubbed the buttons open on your Henley. At the feeling of cold air on the exposed skin of your chest you sucked in a breath to scream but a hand clamped down over your mouth. Perry found your eyes and shook his head, but you couldn’t see the expression on his face through the blur your vision had taken on.

Once he had relieved you of all your weapons, he hauled you back up on your feet. His arms were tight around you, keeping your arms pinned to your sides as he pulled your hands behind your back with one of his own. He pulled your back to his front to try and keep his grip on your frame, but you continued to fight against him, your heart hammering in your chest and your head throbbing.

With all your thrashing, Perry’s hold tightened impossibly on you, the movement causing the back of one of his hands to brush against the waistband of your pants. The clinking sound of your belt buckle against his watch made you go stock still, tears filling your eyes and speeding down your face. The sound of it triggering something ugly and terrified in you. You quickly tried to shake the fear from clouding your mind, body humming but you couldn’t.

“Don’t! Don’t touch me, you motherfucker!” Your voice was trembling despite the volume, the fear all too real and you knocked your head back hard and made contact with his face. The crunch of his nose didn’t affect the hold he had on you, save for causing him to stumble a bit. His foot caught a piece of debris and you both crashed to the ground. The shriek you let out was so loud people flinched. Up in the attic of the house, Joel was sure his heart had stopped for a beat at the sound tearing through your throat.

Perry’s body was heavy on top of yours, but even if he hadn’t fallen on top of you, you wouldn’t have been able to move. There was a sharp pain shooting through your left arm, the sickening feeling of a broken bone churning your stomach. You dry heaved, nothing in your stomach to throw up after having given all your food to Sam earlier in the day. Perry was quick to scramble up on his knees, though he kept you pinned down to the ground, straddling your thighs between them and holding your shoulders down with his hands. His eyes were wide as he took in the damage the fall had caused. You were panting beneath him, chest heaving as pain seared in your body and sweat began to pill along your skin.

The scrape on your forehead had opened up, blood spotting along the deeper parts of it. Your nose, similarly, had begun to throb as the already broken cartilage had been jostled, blood trickling down over your lips. But your arm…your left arm lay still at your side. There was the bright white of bone where it ripped through the flesh on the outside of your forearm. You could feel the tight pull of it on your skin, causing more blood to gush from the wound. Your vision swam as tears stuck to your lashes and pain overwhelmed your nerves.

“Ah, fuck! Oh no. No, no, no, no, no!” Your desperate pleas turned into snarls, trying to move about but being unable to. You glanced down at where you couldn’t feel your arm, the sight making your anxiety spike. You thrashed your head about, seeking out Perry above you. Seeking out Kathleen’s figure still standing close but now over you both, her gun aimed should she need to stop you from getting up and away. “You did not just break my fucking arm!”

“Maybe if you had just come willingly with us, it wouldn’t have happen-“

“Shut the fuck up, you self-righteous bitch!” You growled out, anger taking over any fear that had been in your body. You brought a thigh up hard, using your heel to get momentum behind it and connected It with Perry’s groin, your other knee hitting him low on the back too. The man’s grip left you and you scrambled out from underneath him. You took the gun in the holster on his hip, cocked it, and brough it up to aim right at her, her own having been lowered at the sheer volume of your voice and the vehemence of your words. You put your foot down on the man’s neck, forcing him to the ground. You ground your boot into him until he raised his hands out and placed them atop his head in surrender, a choking sound coming from him.

Your hair was loose and wild about you, but the strands didn’t hide the rage in your eyes, the tear stains that broke up the grime and dirt on your face. Your broken arm was tucked close to your chest, shoulder tense with the effort it took to hold it there and not just let it dangle at your side. You were overtly aware that you were surrounded, that Henry had the kids hiding behind a car far too close, that Joel was up in that house with limited ammo, that you were all so thoroughly fucked.

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[7ban-sama]

nene chan.. wearing a collar?? (its me anon… the one who asks you 2n2n and heartlurch a million questions about au’s and headcanons..) i feel like she’d wear one just for the style of it because it would match good with what she’s wearing… or maybe amane-kun would just make her wear it lool

Greetings! Ooh. Asking me and my wife and... me, a million questions, I see... 🧐 Well luckily for you I will answer a million questions about my ship HCs, AU details, etc etc... I spend all my time thinking about them. So.

Nene in a collar! I'd love to see such a thing. We get to see Amane in collars repeatedly, which is fun, but I'd love to see Nene in something so girly-girl, lacy, ribbony. It'd look so nice in Aida's style haha, I wish I could see it-!! And what outfit would go with such a thing...

WRT the choice to wear it... Hm! I could see her admiring such a thing... Like looking at images on her phone, feeling forlorn, sigh, oh imagine... >< To be 'that sort' of girl who could pull it off... Self-consciousness I think would make her struggle to commit to a purchase though! Like... it'd feel silly to do it on her own... What, or who, is it for? Just alone in her room? And then, it's too bold to ear out in public, errr, can't have her parents seeing her walk out the house like that? (Even if it's not like she'd be shamed, kind of, embarrassing-!?)

I think the greatest fantasy would be if it were a gift from a boy... So she would be wearing it FOR him, as a FAVOR, a GIFT of being pretty girl in collar... Unfortunately that's almost asking too much out of such a normal guy like Amane, somehow I don't think he's so fashionable and able to visualize such a thing on his own kfkfhf... If thinkos collar, probably would be thinking simpler, black band.

It's the sort of thing I'd either imagine Nene-chan having to incept (make it... somehow seem like... his idea...) or be bold and propose like, Do you want me to wear this... <- dangerous, Amane sucks, even if he's really into it he might, say something, rude or, maybe not say anything at all...

But it's interesting whether or not it's canon ghost boy or, an alive boy, hm! Hanako-kun is more... overtly gnasty... If they were already 'established' in some sense (fooling, even if pre-confessions/dating) ; he could be shown such a thing and be like ugh dirty girl... whaaaaaaat~? You want me to put a collar on you... lol, is THAT what you're into?? Yashiro... (Shitty tone but domineering at least, like make her feel small BUT... turned on.) Like tears in her eyes, face red, but, I think he could smooth it over, hold her jaw and croon and be like, awww, if that's what you want... Condescension. You have Nene-chan boiling as she buys it later at home [face buried in pillow!!] but I think the reward is well worth it. He will [clumsily...] cinch it around her neck. Touch slowly, lingering... finger the material. Fixate on it during sex. It's like mrhh... does hurt when girlie want to look nice for you. Siiigh, a pretty and cute girl...

However I'm really amused by the alternate timeline, of. Nene running a longcon with alive boy, non-supernatural Amane. Take him to a, store, go shopping with him, look at thingsss... and then just PASS BY such accessories and, glance at them but, you know not, say anything. And maybe watch as he stares at it like "..." but says nothing. JUST LET IT INCUBATE... in this case it'd literally be helpful to have Tsukasa there to be like WHAT ABOUT THESE? Oh... LIKE A KITTY CAT, WOW.... ^^ WOULD NENE-CHAN LIKE THAT? [Amane scruffs Tsukasa] [angry... grr... WHY YOU THINKING ABOUT HER WEARING SUCH THINGS... TSUKASA-!!] [but like hrn,............]

The next phase of this is a very ambiguous amount of time (MONTHS...? A YEAR...?) before it's like cough. Buys you this. One wishes it were more romantic perhaps but I think it's kind of like, sweaty dark aura, guy who is dealing with a fetish, vibes, instead. THAT'S... OKAY-!! Though. It's fine,

Final thoughts is I think in Bakeneko Ryokan, the endgame would be getting Nene-chan a collar, though matchies with him and Tsukasa. The little tassel beneath it and all... stylish. Jingle jingle.

[bonesandthebees]

WE’RE ALL SYNCED NOOO…. everyone remember to rest and eat and hot water bottles help with cramps but don’t burn urselves .. and maybe take some paracetamol too (or ibuprofen if ur feeling silly) my mother swears by it . I think it’s just a desi thing and like willpower i forgot tje term but like . when u believe something will help u so much it does . But it works for me..

AND HONEY WATER!! i will stand by honey water till the day i die just boil some water and add some honey and wait for it to cool (don’t burn ur throats guys) Or just add a bit of cold water like i do and supposedly that helps with a sore throat and it makes u feel all warm and fuzzy . my Dad taught me the first one he says its cause of the texture i never fact checked that

i’m getting carried away with the random food things ONE MORE FOR GOOD LUCK if u want . to make Desi chai . boil half a cup of water and put tjat in a tiny saucepan with the teabag, one cardamom (make sure u crack it open so the tiny little seeds drop out), like a Teaspoon of fennel seeds or something idk i just add whatever amount looks good, and optionally a little bit of cinnamon (again i just wing it just add a small bit) and some sugar/sweetener and let that all simmer for like 30 seconds while u get half a cup of milk and pour that into ur saucepan . Thenn you wanna mix that around a bit and leave it all to . cook? that doesn’t sound like the right word… whatever. leave it for a few minutes and ur final step is when the chai starts rising u let it rise to the top and then turn down the heat and let it sink (i have a gas stove but if you have an electric ermm just set it aside for two secs to sink i think that’ll work). let it rise and sink three times!!! this really makes the flavour pop according to my dad!! then just strain it and enjoy :3 i lovee chai it was inevitable being pakistani HAHA it always makes me feel better after anything whether i feel sick or something bad happens or if i’m just silly chai is just nice for any occasion . my phopo calls me an auntie but Likeee isnt being a rich brown auntie the life…… im not rich yet but one day guys trust

anyway that got long HAHA i love cooking and baking and stuff … and home remedies MEDICATION IS GOOD DONT GET ME WRONG but sometimes im too lazy to run to the shops and get some cough syrup or something so i just make some honey water .. please take ur meds and get vaccinated though guys ❤️ stay safe hope u liked my chai :3

do you know how many asks I've gotten saying they're also on their period literally why are all of my followers synced up WHAT IS THIS

everyone listen to our friend here. honey water sounds lovely I'll have to try it. usually I just go for drinking honey straight out of the bottle if I have a sore throat but I suppose honey water might work a bit better lol

also OOOO CHAI!! tbh I've always wanted to make chai at home because so often chai I've gotten in coffee shops just... isn't it. but when it's good it's so good. I'm going to take note of this so I can get some cardamom and fennel seeds from the store :))) so excited to try it

[moog-enthusiast]

Any recommendations on good Polaroid cameras? i have an instax mini 9 and its pretty shit IMO, the colours bearly show, im not sure if thats because im doing something wrong though? but i saw you said you dislike instax cameras so im curious if you could suggest any better ones! (luckily i got it for free and it works, just feel like im doing something wrong with it)

I HATE INSTAX CAMERAS!!!!!! you’re totally right with the weird faded colors, it’s an issue i’ve noticed frequently with instax film! i don’t think you’re doing anything wrong, but rather that it’s just an issue with the brand.

In terms of other instant film camera recommendations, I have a couple!

1.) Polaroid Onestep SX-70

An instant classic!! I have one of these cameras, and it’s 100% my favorite of my collection. Polaroid still produces film for these, and so they’re not too much of a hassle to find film- which is an issue with most other old instant film cameras. (cough cough, kodak colorburst. don’t buy those)

if you find one with a flash bar, you’re golden! but even if you don’t have a flashbar (like me!) you can still take gorgeous photos outside ^^!! i wish i knew where my photo album was right now. my rooms a mess post graduating, so i can’t find it :’D!! but basically, 10/10. could only be better if the polaroid film quality was as good as it was in the 80s haha

2. Kodak instant-printer camera

this camera works similarly to a digital camera, allowing you to review your photo before you print , so you never have to waste any of your film! i’ve had this one for a few years, and it’s a lot of fun. my model actually prints like a printer, and moves in and out of the camera to print the ink colors one at a time before it pops out. it’s kind of entertaining i can’t lie…

one of their models even utilized the classic square film we all know and love! 9/10, simply because i have a hard time finding film even if it’s still being produced.

3. Polaroid Now i-type

god i want one of these so bad it’s not even funny. although on the pricier side, these cameras take old polaroid technology, using the same film cartridges as the Polaroid-600, and have a built in flash as well as a modern build that will (hopefully) work for years n years to come. I haven’t gotten to try one yet, but it looks promising from what i’ve seen!

[cryingforhyo]

i guess it's safe to say that I'm one of your old readers in this fandom. 😅 I've been a reader since you drop Push and Pull out on that holiday night.

I read most of your fics too. there's only one or two fic that I haven't read in the past year because life is a bit hectic now.

this is not a subtle request btw, but I'm curious if you have a 'verse focused about coming-out or realizing one's sexual orientation. I don't exactly remember every detail but, iirc, most of your fics' characters have implied sexuality which are lesbians.

It will be cool to know how you guys write about the experiences of coming out from your time period. ( I don't mean to make you feel so old 😭 but I know you two are in your 30s and are wiser and more experienced than we are (early 20s) ) I remember reading a post that it was really a different social scene compared to now.

maybe I'm also curious how you two became friends, then roommates *cough* *coughhhhh* and then wives because tbh I'm surrounded by hetero couples irl that reading about you two fascinates me.

I'm sorry for this ramble. feel free to ignore it too if it's borderline invasive. and sorry if you'll see this on a Monday morning

first off, thank you dear reader for being with us for so long! time surely flies when you're having fun, because wdym push & pull is approaching its 3rd anniversary??? creating for this fandom has been such a joint delight for the both of us, and we're just happy to share the journey with friends like you :) take your time re the new fics, esp if they're wips! we're working on them relatively slower, because life has also been hella hectic hereabouts.

onto your second query: i think this question is very interesting, actually! to address it head on, for this particular fandom i don't think i've written a 'verse where the specific challenge for any of the characters is coming to terms with their sexuality. i quite like living in this fantasy world where people are simply as-is-where-is lesbians haha. for example in our childhood best friends to lovers stories, when someone realizes their attraction, the realization is not so much about falling in love with another woman, but about falling in love with this specific person.

this way, it's the characters' shared context and history that makes their dynamic compelling, instead of the much more global milieu of lgbt relationships existing alongside all these issues and history, etc. which i also think are interesting stories to tell! but for purposes of this fandom in particular, which i think exists in a sociopolitical context that is beyond my expertise--i leave those stories to better-positioned storytellers :) in the true spirit of creating in this era, i do not want to get anything so egregiously wrong it will detract from the reader's experience.

but seriously, i have been obsessed about writing coming out/ coming of age stories for the longest time, mostly for my original work, which are set locally with local OCs. they were all i wrote about back in the day, so i guess for fanfic i figured i could instead try all the other tropes that weren't so close to real life, where coming out can be fraught and complicated. it's for the same reason that i don't write compulsory heterosexuality (comphet) or i avoid writing men as third parties in general... i've already spent a significant chunk of my writing life writing /that/ story, or at least that’s how it felt like.

but you make a good point! i'd love to try revisiting that coming out/coming of age trope and give it some aged-up flavor. let's see about that :)

on a personal note, many times when i look at today's digital landscape, I often go, thank god [this or that] did not exist just yet back in the day [or at least not in this manner] when i was figuring my shit out, because oh boy. the clout i could have chased and cancellations i could have booked haha.

suffice it to say i'm happy the digital footprints of past egregious mistakes are now buried with the deaths of old platforms. we were very lucky to have lived and loved and lost in an age where the internet could still afford some measure of forgetting.

(i know there's probably no going back to that kind of landscape, but i hope it's not too late for us to be a little kinder to each other, and definitely more forgiving of ~youth and elderly~, given how fast information cycles around these days and how wide the age range of users concurrently using the same digital spaces right now can be. it's NUTS.)

that said, c would like to clarify she is still in her twenties! hahaha. i confirm this. i also confirm that you're right to say i (k) am already out of my twenties haha.

we actually became friends through fandom! we met on tumblr lmao because that's where you met other wlw back in the day (idk if that's still where people are, istg i would not survive the current dating landscape either!) so i would not be exaggerating when i say fandom brought us together, and we're still cycling through fandoms together, having been to various ones in the past handful of years. that said we look forward to more fandoms to add to our list lol.

thanks for this ask - it's actually the PERFECT thing to see on a monday morning, in fact. hope your week goes well!

[itslilacokay]

what no sleep does to a mf (i got a paper trail analysis

funny story haha, so in a server i witnessed a few talking about what it would look like if the 7 traits were taken to an extreme, and after that i get reminded of paper trail every time i think of the extreme traits and i had to share this because this is one of the first actual "analysis" stuff i ever do

for those that have not seen nor read paper trail, see it as this has spoilers to the comic! read it right now now nown now n

lets start off with what the extreme traits are (based off two people)

determination -> obsession

bravery -> recklessness

justice -> judgementalism

kindness -> sacrifice

patience -> inaction

integrity -> blindness

perseverance -> stubbornness

(these will be explained further down the post dw)

i thought of these at least appearing once in each dark world with a trait corresponding to a prince world, hell i thought of an extreme trait being noticed in some princes, there are exceptions but the real point of this analysis is that its shown in paper trail so imma start off already before i forget

gotta start off though right off the bat that unfortunately i couldnt notice sacrifice with ralsei happening in paper trail, so thats one exception

kindness, or in this case sacrifice is not going to be mentioned moving forward until proven otherwise, sorry

so lets start with the first new prince we see in the comic instead, which would be eslira

eslira represents the patience trait but now in this case, inaction

inaction is in a way patience to an extreme since you have to wait/have tolerance a long time with patience, but you dont do anything even though you have to in certain situations with inaction

eslira throughout the whole comic, does none shit he does NOTHING at all!!!!!!!!

all the other princes did something somehow, like with aelsir's haste, the super pacify with irales and ralsei, lairse, even SARELI did something and he just lullaby'd with ralsei

but eslira? they dont do anything. they just follow along and stay in the sidelines always worried, basic inaction right there

he could in a way helped the fun gang in some small little way with the yisho fight, or in any fight really in trophy city but he does nothing at all, he just stands there worrying and and sitting and

anyway aelsir's next with bravery, or in extreme form, recklessness

its only shown once in aelsir's respective dark world, with the thunder hills and with the soul just still trekking along even though they get damaged every time a lightning hits which is every 4 seconds

recklessness IS moving along in a lack of regard for danger, while bravery is moving along even something is frightening, so i say this works!

sorry theres not much for bravery boy there isnt much to go off of extreme traitwise for his section haha

irales now

for how i see it, stubbornness is moving forward without really accepting any other paths that could be easier, good or bad while perseverance is moving forward despite difficulty

you could say that for someone to go through a hard path, and moving forward with said hard path even though theres much easier and better path, is a sign of stubbornness to me

for irales, its more of a personality thing

irales is stubborn in a way, since he doesnt seem to accept any other possible reasons and just sticks to what he sees and its only until the end he actually isnt a stubborn little fuc

okay. well you can also say lairse is stubborn as well in a way that he wont accept monsters, but its layered under an extreme justice and for a huge reason, irales' stubbornness is based off i dont know what he sees apparently (refer to previous link)

sareli's up with blindness i mean integrity i mean

as one member said, one can be blinded by their beliefs COUGH CXOUGH @mileymint COUUYGHHHHH so lets base it off that!

integrity is a truth/moral/belief related trait, and you can probably see why blindness is a possible integrity extent after i type this

for integrity to turn into blindness, one must believe that what they are doing is truly right though its really not, and even if others say otherwise, they wouldnt agree since it goes against their morals and/or beliefs, thus leading them to be "blinded" as they cant "see" what is wrong with what they believe or think is the truth

sareli, throughout his whole section, has been doubting his actions since his prophecy just tells him he will fail and even though he gets told otherwise that he CAN help, he immediately disagrees with them since it goes against with what he believed for a long time, and since it turns out he will fail anyway in the prophecy, why would he NOT fail now when he tries to do something?

and now lairse. ohh lairse where do i begin

i admit, i thought up justice's extreme trait. there was scrupulosity, but its more of obsessed with judging of oneself based off if they are against their own morals and/or religious morals/reasons, judgementalism is sortof the opposite, ie judging of others immediately possibly based of their own morals and/or to an extent, religious morals/reasons, instead of hearing their own reasonings and how they are really like

lairse immediately dislikes susie and noelle due to them being monsters, who in his eyes, are sinful for what they have done despite susie and noelle knowing none of that and having no part in that event

hell, he even told them that they weren't allowed to come with him, kris, ralsei and lancer only BECAUSE they were monsters, thats intense judgementalism right there, heading off to racist territory honestl

for determination turned to obsession, i think i can see a bit of obsession in asriel but not in the way you think

obsession can be bomped down to just having a certain idea, person, desire, or thing on your mind all the time

and assuming that while asriel was in college, he still had the thought of the trapped humans in mind almost all the time, id say that is just simple example of obsession shown in paper trail for asriel

but thats not all as i have something else.

the knight.

"but liiiiilaaaacc!!! hes not a prince and he doesnt have a dark world relating to the determination trait!!!!" like i said in the start, this was made due to me realizing how extreme traits are shown in paper trail as a comic, not just the princes. so i wouldnt say this is an exception!

the knight and asriel have, in a way, the same desire; freeing humans. its just that the knight takes it way too far

his obsession to freeing humans has turned him desperate, wanting to free his kind from the depths of the earth, trying all he can, even making a twitter account just for a chance to get us to play the game and possibly freeing all the humans by just simply playing through dark worlds

his desperateness turned to obsession for freedom of humans in a way, is what im trying to say

aaaand thats it i think! thats all i have in my mind

holy dang this took a while i hope you guys like this silly analysis this took me a long while and a lot of researching

who is reading this