#just imagine a regular white and red chicken

[pleb-the-original]

Well, there's something a little extra special about my Heart, Mind and Soul that I just finished up. Now as I listened to the album and got more into crafting my version of the story, I created something new: the Tridental Sovereign forms. To summarize, these forms basically signify Concord by the trident breaking apart and releasing everyone's missing aspects as well as giving back Heart and Mind's memories of the previous loops. They're also my way of introducing some more common fanon elements into their designs. These forms are basically the three coming one step closer to actually being happy, although as we all know the loop continues as eventually they have to lose these powers and reform the trident. One last clarification: they get the forms when they sing the "tridential sovereignty" line in Two Wuv, they start losing their powers by Greener and the end of Special, they fully lose the extra powers by TMR, and they lose their memories at the end of Mucka Blucka. I'll make a timeline soon probably, but now onto the actual forms themselves!

Fun Facts: Heart gets his wings! And yes they do work. Heart doesn't know they're specifically chicken wings which cracks up Mind and Soul. He is good at upkeep though. The blindfolds are more for comfort. The bangles are more a last minute addition since the the other 2 have magical artifacts and I didn't want to leave Heart out. There isn't really a concrete power set for them, they can just do whatever Heart needs them to do. They're practical. Also the heart symbol thing isn't exclusive to this form, this is just a demonstration of how it looks when Heart is feeling heightened emotions. The wings act as a signifier of Heart shedding some of his self-sabotage and self-loathing by letting himself fly free.

Fun Facts: Mind gets some more royal garb. I didn't think a crown would look good on him but luckily the scepter technically has a crown. The plug tail is meant to be a signifier of Mind being more open with his emotions as it does act as an indicator but he usually hides it under the cape out of lingering feelings against being too emotional. Also why has no one else given him an Aussie specific plug tail, you'd think that'd be a given. I've mentioned this in the tags of previous posts but this is where it comes in but Mind is actually posic and objectum. Specifically, he is married to his wife: the scepter. He loves the scepter and treats it better than his own others but they accept it because love. There is an aura of tragedy as Mind believes the scepter is the only one that truly understands him. (There is also the fact that he feels like the scepter is trapped inside the trident when its around. He does hear the trident too during Cacophony by the way, it can be very cruel.) The scepter is also able to float freely. And being a magical artifact it can do basically anything Mind wants it too. And that extends to literally anything as Mind can excuse any weird magical nonsense that would normally drive him crazy with the simple logic of "my wife is amazing and can do anything" The cape is attached on the back.

Fun Facts: Soul gets their half shadow and mask! And yes the shadow is a physical split in their body. The horns are grown from the head in front of the hair. They're actually a signifier of Soul being more accepting of their inhuman nature (but of course not quite fully accepting it). It isn't noted in the ref but when the mask comes off, it's linked to Soul's face with a small bit of red lightning. The mask giving Heart and Mind's major changes and the heart shaped duo tail are also meant to represent Soul accepting the fact that they do love their ids and also reconnecting with them since Soul is pretty distant during Cacophony.

[knight-a3]

Heavenbound AU

Hazbin Masterpost

Mimzy

Mimsy was an interesting one to work on. I wanted to make sure she looked inhuman like the other characters, but without making too big of a change. Canon Mimzy basically just has the black eyes and sharp teeth.

She's apparently loosely based off a chicken, which is why she has a hooked nose. But I knew pretty early on that I wanted to use peacock colors. It also helps increase the color variety of the cast by reducing the red.

More notes under the cut

Face: I gave her face markings that resemble running mascara, because I figured she wanted to be a showgirl or movie star or something. But she kept getting rejected, so she cried a lot. And apparently "mimsy" was a word coined by Lewis Carroll and is a blend of "miserable" and "flimsy".

She has vampire fangs for two reasons:

1. She leeches off others. Alastor was missing for 7 years, and the first thing she does is dump her problems on him.

2. In the 1920s, there was an equivalent to femme fetale called "Vamp". Vamps were more or less extra promiscuous versions of flappers.

Hair: An iconic 1920s hairstyle was finger waves. I made them a bit loose, because I didn't like how it looked plastered to her head.

I know she has a tattoo in the show, but I don't know how important it is for her to have it. So I just didn't bother with it. If it becomes significant, I'll add it back in.

Mimzy said that she and Alastor ran in the same circles while they were alive. He frequented the club that she sang at. But she also sounds like she's from New York, so I'm not sure how/why they ended up in the same place.

She died in the 1920s in her late 20s or early 30s. Not sure how she died.

1920s fashion--

I'll try to keep this brief. You know the stereotypical flapper dress? With the fringes? That wasn't really a thing. The style was slim, dropped waist, and no curves. The clothes weren't heavily tailored and just draped over the body like a potato sack. Fringes happened occasionally, but not often. More common was beading, pleats, tiers, and ruffles. The skirts were shorter than in previous generations, but they were still below the knee. Sometimes the stockings would be rolled down so the edge was visible--Scandalous!

While I appreciate the body diversity with Mimzy, she is honestly not an ideal choice to show off 1920s fashion. Plus sized women could utilize vertical lines to help create the illusion of thinness. So I changed canon Mimzy's film strip motif and made it vertical instead. Historically, the top would not be so form fitting, but I'm claiming that modern influences got to her a little bit. But in her human design, I'm claiming it's just stylized.

The stereotypical flapper dress better resembles showgirls and lingerie, imo. Not entirely sure what to think of that, but there it is.

Makeup--There are two makeup styles to go over. Regular and movies.

Regular is fairly straight forward. Pale skin. Black eyeshadow(or a color that matched the eyes). Thin, pencil-drawn eyebrows that look kinda sad. Lips with an emphasized cupid's bow. Rosy blush on the center of the cheeks.

Movie makeup: I went down a rabbit hole with this topic. It gets pretty interesting, but I am simplifying a lot. I also only know the basics.

The 20s was a transition period of the types of film used. There was the older orthochromatic/blue-sensitive film, which struggled to pick up warmer colors. Reds ended up darker than they really were, and tended to emphasize facial blemishes. This was counteracted by lighting and makeup. They used Arc lights, which gave off a blue-green light, were noisy, and hard on the actor's eyes.

The idea was basically to wash everything in blue light, to counter any reds present. Then they just had to worry about values. White or creme makeup was used to even out the skin tone (At least for white people, didn't find anything for other skin tones, but I imagine the basic idea would be similar). Then dark blues were used to contour the face, enhance definition/contrast, and mimic blush. Light blues would act as highlights. The lips would vary based on if you wanted a natural look or not. Greens and yellows could get a natural to dark lipstick appearance. If red was used, it could only get a dark lipstick look. Overall, the actors would have looked pretty weird.

If regular makeup colors were used, then everything would end up looking too dark.

Panchromatic film started becoming more widespread by the late 1920s. It had a wider range of sensitivity(but was still more blue sensitive than the human eye, which is more yellow sensitive. Reds were difficult for film even into the 21st century. That could lead me into a tangent about the Raimi Spiderman films, but I'll hold it in). They were able to switch to incandescent lighting, which were quieter(important for the rise of "talkies") and easier to maintain. The way makeup was previously used in movies was essentially invalidated.

(Below)I'm not sure what type of film the left side was designed for exactly, possibly panchromatic(because the green and purple is an interesting choice) or early color. But the right side is for blue-sensitive films.

I guess I bring this up because it's interesting, and helps me justify her blue-green color scheme.

I think that's everything relevant.

(Feb 17, 2025- moved the human Mimzy picture to be above the cut)

[rebootgrimm]

Okay so I saw Null’s trailer animated as if it were in BFDIA: TPOT (animation credits to Konneguy. Animation here). Might draw these later, idk. It’s under the cut due to it being LONG. If everyone had an appearance in tbe BFDI crossover and either I missed it or the wiki didn’t show it, I’m going to lose my mind /gen. This has taken me 3-ish hours to do. please reblog it took me so long

Poob: This one’s obvious since Poob already was one in the trailer, but Poob is a party horn.

Bive: Was also in the trailer, but she wasn’t an object. I want to say that she’d be a notebook due to it being implied to be where she writes everything down in a conversation with Pilby. She also would likely have glasses (drawn on or taped on) on herself as well, like she does in canon.

Unpleasant: I’m going to be honest, I don’t have a lot to go off of here. According to the wiki, Unpleasant is a “solid rectangle with exactly one nerve”. I’m just going to say that Unpleasant is a poster and move on because I have no clue what else I could possibly do.

Reddy: Reddy is a red animatronic for the Redball company whose full name is “Reddy Franz Redballs”. Safe to say it would be a red ball robot (like flower robot, but a red ball).

Mannequin Mark: It. It’s in the name. MANNEQUIN Mark. I think he’d kinda look like David regarding how human-like he looks. Except for the fact that they have no legs and instead have a stand.

Gnarpy: It would be easy (and incredibly funny) to make Gnarpy a UFO, but yknow how there’s Algebraliens??? Yeah, so Animaliens. Animal aliens. Jermbo is one of those too. Gnarpy is a bipedal Animalien cat.

Mozelle: Okay on one hand, Inanimate Insanity already has a character that is a bow and they’ve collabbed. On the other hand, both shows have a character named “Taco”. On that note, Mozelle would be a bow with demon horns to symbolize her being from hell. I’d make them be a crown with said horns but uh… she doesn’t wear one of those.

Scag: So apparently she was in an appearance for the BFDI crossover and appeared as a blue floppy so uh… yeah. That.

MR: yeah uh. that is a rock. Would it be funny if it just floated around everywhere? Yes. Am I imagining him acting more like One and having no arms but using magic for everything instead? Also yes.

NULL: Okay whatever Null is, it’s a robot. In the animation I mentioned earlier, Null is a chicken hat. It makes sense since that’s really the only notable thing accessory wise about him, but it would be REALLY funny if it was a robotic chicken. Albeit, a chicken is more of an animal than an object so uh… chicken hat it is.

Jermbo: As mentioned earlier, Jermbo is an Animalien (bipedal cat Animalien).

Prototype: Was also in the crossover, appeared as a gray wooden box with his regular horns (one on each of the box corners where their face is).

Folly: In the animation I mentioned before, Folly is her hat. While it’s a great idea, I don’t want to steal the idea. Instead, I’m going to say Folly is her mask, with the same side gone like in canon and her red eye is just floating there… somehow. The Diamond eye is a bit shorter so that way an arm and mouth can fit without looking weird. Folly only has one arm due to the broken mask.

Split: Look at her. That is a banana.

Melanie: It has dawned on me that this game has a lot of robots. Anyways. Bunny-themed television. Can you tell I’m getting tired? This has taken me roughly two hours at this point.

Dr. Retro: Canonically had an appearance form for the crossover, was a cat-themed Gumball machine.

Pilby: Another difficult one. Pilby would probably be a clown nose due to the fact that they’re a clown.

Infected: Had an appearance in the BFDI crossover. He was a tv showing static and his infection covering their right eye.

Pest: Had an appearance in the crossover. Was the letter “P” (white and blocky with red outline) with mandibles.

Spud!: Due to the capture and experimentation by Gnarpy (and other Gnarpians), I want to say that Spud! would be partly Animalien, but not fully. I want to say she’d be a bucket that has parts of a fox (reasoning: silly /pos)

Stat: Stat has a crossover appearance, appearing as a “Davidian” with her normal hairstyle.

Wallter: Wallter appeared in the crossover as a literal wall with grass underneath.

Flesh Cousin: This one is tricky due to not having much to work with, however I think it would be a mirror that can copy the appearance of others, much like they can do in-game.

Lampert: …that is a lamp.

[crimeboys]

curious about what wu!sbi would tend to wear in terms of clothing,. definitely not for art purposes

thank you and have a good day! :]

hii i love answering questions that are definitely not for art purposes!!

so im kind of the worst. bc i never describe peoples clothing due to my nature. and i lowkey forget that no one can see into my mind's eye so uhhh.

wilbur: basically just his canon apparel. im always imagining him in his usual yellow sweater layered with his shitty trenchcoat and black pants. have no true opinion on his shoes but i imagine him mostly in brown loafers.

tommy: also basically just his canon apparel. red and white t-shirt, cargo shorts.

technoblade: here's where i start gettin a little crazy. i imagine wu!techno in like black dress pants and solid light color button up shirts. i really dont think about his clothes at all he could be in a chicken suit for all of washed up for all i know. maybe a really comfy winter jacket once the cold starts. that's all i got.

phil: so for phil i imagine him in like regular blue jeans and a lightweight olive green flight/bomber jacket.

i hope this helped in any way!! im very open to interpretation especially with techno lmfao.

[takabinaryy]

Sick Baby

Request was made by GremlinComandr on AO3 Parent aka papa/dad- Takami Shinyo/ex villain Takami Thief Big Brother/Bubba- Takami Keigo Boyfriend/Dada- Monoma Little- Katsuki

Normally Kat doesn't get sick , he's always healthy and eating healthy to , even when COVID was bad he didn't. Get sick because he made sure he was extra careful not to get sick like a lot of people did. But unfortunately for Katsuki he had caught the compon flu ,you know the whole runny nose, flushed red face , sometimes fever. Yeah Kat had all of that and the poor baby had woken up Little that morning feeling just. Fine but as the day went on he swears life hates because he has the flu now and katsuki is definitely not happy about it.

Now the ash blonde is upstairs in his bedroom laying in his bed, with a semi-wet wash cloth folded on his forehead. There's a bottle of blue Gatorade next to a sippy cup full of water on the nightstand. Katsuki noticed his phone was flashing on a few times before he reached over and took , it seeing that he forgot to put it on silent and that his boyfriend was calling him. The sickly blonde of the two just sets it to speaker and , sets it on the bed as he curls up in a ball hugging his stuffed wolf.

" Hey Angel , I haven't heard anything from you all day so I'm just checking in"

" hm hi "

" oh Suki your voice doesn't sound to good, Lovey did you catch a cold?"

" mmhmms donts like it"

" does anything else feel icky or hurts?"

" head doesnts likes me , icky all over dada "

" i imagine so Angel I'm sorry your sick. Is your brother or dad home with you? Or are you home alone?

" Bubba had to works ands papa went outs for more yucky medicin"

" alright and how old is my baby right now?"

" .....two"

" okay honey I'll be coming over in a few okay? Think you can drink some water for me? I'll make you some tea when I get there"

"I can try "

"That's all I ask "

And just like that Kat left his phone on speaker for the last 30 minutes just listening to his dada talk to him , while he waited for him and his papa to get home. Shinyo actually got home first with more medication and his youngest son's favorite soup.( it's just chicken soup but instead regular noodles it was heart shaped celery ) A little bit later Monoma comes over being let in by the older bird , once inside he sets the stuff he had brought for Kat on the kitchen counter.  Then goes up to said boy's room , once in the room he took a look at his sick little boyfriend, Katsuki had a mask on probably put it on after they had hung up on the phone. He's wearing a shirt that is to big for him , that  probably belongs to Keigo , half of his body is covered by a thin dark green sheet with a few red feathers everywhere.

Kat noticed the other and smiles slightly as his boyfriend walks over to the bed with a bag of blue and white shark gummies? The other sits on the end of the bed facing kat with his own smile. He puts the bag on his lap and hands the little a different sippy cup full of half juice and liquid medicine.

“ can you please drink half of that for me Angel? Your papa said it was okay to give you candy just not a whole lot of it. I know shark gummies are your favorite”

“ can has two of em after I drink juice?”

“ of course you can baby “

Katsuki sits up against his pillows and drinks a little bit more then half , which was to be expected since being sick leads to being dehydrated a lot. After that he puts it next to his other sippy cup and makes grabby hands for the gummies. which after he said please, they were given to him with a kiss to his forehead. After maybe an hour or two the youngest Takami is being carried out of his room and down the stairs to the living room , and gently set on the nest on the floor by his Papa. While Monoma gets the soup that’s on the stove into a bowl for the baby bird in the living room. Said baby bird moved and gets placed into his papa’s lap sitting sideways , and gets spoon fed by his Cargiver/Boyfriend. Once the baby bird had eaten enough to , all three blondes settle down in the nest and watch a few movies. And that’s how Keigo found them hours later when he got home , his dad , his baby brother and baby brother’s boyfriend all passed out in the living room nest.

[apocryphal-archetypes]

thinking about heathers (1989). honestly gobsmacked and flabbergasted that it even exists.

-it's a movie about high school that is rated R, so the majority of high school-aged people aren't supposed to watch it without a parent.

-none of the actors are actual teenagers and you can REALLY tell because apparently the popular girls at this high school decided they needed to look like the top accountants at goldman sachs.

-also, they play croquet.

-a disaffected young white man plots an act of terror against a high school and this isn't even the main bad thing that happens because the movie came out ten years before that started to become a regular occurrence in american schools.

-it's a movie about gen x written by someone slightly too old to be gen x, so they're caricatured as these morally bankrupt gothic misanthropes. yes xoomers did eat it up.

-betty finn is the hottest nerd you've ever seen and she's preppy but the heathers still decided that veronica, who probably used to growl at people freshman year, should be the one to join their clique.

-this movie is the only time any person, real or fictional, has ever expressed a desire for corn nuts.

-or validated the existence of corn nuts.

-jd knows that his dad exploded his mom and just. lives with him. as if their family was the normal amount of fucked up? he tells veronica abt his mother's death like it's nothing. she decides that what he needs is some spaghetti.

-heather chandler (the most important heather) is dead for the majority of the movie. her ghost appears wearing an outfit she did not die in, never wore, and in fact, wouldn't have been caught dead wearing in life.

-jd's grandpa was a nazi and the canon reason he brings this up is to make veronica less afraid of the fact that he has a gun.

-the surreal elements don't even read as taking place only in veronica's imagination because the entire everything is so buck wild.

-the cheerleader outfits for westerburg high are black with red accents like they're extras in a my chemical romance music video or something.

-heather duke is an ornery repressed lesbian who binges rotisserie chicken in the locker room because if she looked at a woman's body in anything less than a power suit she would implode.

-the whole thing takes place in ohio?

however the most unrealistic part of all of this is that veronica successfully fakes her suicide to her boyfriend whose main characteristic is being obsessed with death and destruction.

and then they made it into a musical on the west end where kurt kelly's dad sings a song about how he loves his dead gay son and the vietnam war is played for a flippant analogy.

because of the language, alcohol use, sex, and triggering content there is a high school edit of the musical. you may have logically assumed that this high school edition is considered appropriate for high schoolers. however i have seen at least one production of heathers the musical high school edition marked as "for mature audiences only".

there is no way this movie exists in the real world. it feels like a fucking straw man. what the fuck. what the fuck. it can't possibly be normal to like this movie.

[shankss-magnificent-ass]

Imagine using Gen Z humor and insults with the red haired pirates part 2

You: *standing on deck, facing a strong wind* it is hecking wimdy, my dudes.

Shanks: no shit we're heading into a storm, get your tiny ass inside before you get blown away. Go now!

You: *goes to the doors and falls as you grab the door handle* oh worm

Shanks: you idiot!

You: *gets to your feet and slides inside with shanks of your heels*

On a temperate island

Benn: I don't know what this plant is, but I think we can eat it

You: that's Deadly nightshade

Shanks: how do you know?

You: the song, you know

Shanks: the song?

You: *starts to sing* "'I have deadly nightshade, so twisted does it grow, with berries black as midnight and a skull as white as snow. Beware all men who come here and have a glass of tea, if you touch us without asking you'll be buried neith our tree.'"

Shanks: *makes a note to see what other posions you know about* good to know

Back on the ship

Shanks and Benn: *bickering over something small which devolves into wrestling, which results in them breaking a coffee table*

You: you're both idiots, why am I on your crew again?

Shanks: *hugs you and squishes his cheek against the top of your head* because you care about us.

You: oh right, *starts yelling* I just had to catch feelings

That evening

Shanks: *decides to mess with you, and try to take advantage of the fact that you lived on land most of your life* hey (y/n), there's a new sea monster you haven't seen before!

You: what really! *Goes to look over the side of the ship* that's just a regular ass shark, you burnt chicken nugget.

Shanks: *sticks his tongue out at you*

Later

You, drunk: the ocean is a soup.

Shanks: what?

You: the ocean is a soup

Shanks: I don't follow

You: what do you need for soup?

Shanks: salt, water, some vegetables, and some meat, some spices, some broth... Oh my god the ocean is a soup... I hate you

The song is by the tiktok user @deloresstoker

[masonmountsbitch]

One with Jadon,pranking him that you’re pregnant but actually end up being pregnant 🥺

an: I didn’t really like the idea of ‘pranking’ as such but this was as good as I could think of. Let me know your thoughts :) hope you liked it x

Requests are still open x

Pregnancy - Jadon Sancho

“Are you feeling any better?” You hear Jadon say as he enters the living room. 

You had been slumping about for the past three days with sickness and cramps. Rarely moving due to Jadon's need to care for you. 

“I haven't been sick since you left.” You respond, turning round to see a sweaty, slightly red Jadon. 

He places a quick kiss onto your forehead, “That's better at least. I'm going to shower quick.” You give him a quick nod before turning back to watch your program. 

Your rudely interrupted by your phone vibrating, picking it up you realise that your friend, your/friends/name was calling. You swipe to accept the call, pausing your program as it connects. 

“Hello? You alright?” You ask, wondering what her reason was for calling you. 

“Are you alright? Are you still being sick?” She asked, concern present on her face as she spoke. 

“Yeah, only the once earlier this morning though. I haven't ate much, but I'm just not feeling anything.”  

“Are you late on?” she raised her eyebrow slightly as she asked. Regular periods weren't something you had often, so it didn't even come to your mind to check if you were late. 

“I don't come on regularly, I shouldn't  be pregnant I'm on the pill.” You attempt to convince yourself. Your/friends/name gives you an unconvinced face.

You let out a slight laugh, “He’s coming downstairs, ill let you know.”

As soon as he slumps onto the couch beside you, he instantly places his head in your lap, taking an interest to the paused tv screen. You un-pause the tv, continuing the program. 

With fingers running through his hair, you breath deeply attempting to make this moment as serious as ever. “I think I'm pregnant.”

Jadon instantly shoots up from his previous spot, looking at you dead in the eyes. His mouth open slightly with the smallest smile on his face, he looks at you through squinted eyes as he tried to figure out if you were at it or not. 

“Are you serious?” 

“Yeah.” You continue. You knew you couldn't be pregnant due to being on birth control for this reason, you knew it was down to some dodgy chicken you had ate days before at a restaurant that you were ill from. It had happened previously at the same place, why did you give that place a second chance? 

He continued to stare at you while he attempted to think of something to say. Your cover breaks at his expression and you cant hold your laugh in any longer. 

“Why are you laughing?” He asked, a confused expression on his face. 

You gave him a smile, “I cant be pregnant babe, I'm on the pill. Its just from that meal we had the other day,” You can see the relief flood over his body as he lay back down beside you. 

“Shouldn't you check?” He asks, while running his fingers over your bare thighs. 

“Babe, it was dodgy chicken” You protest. You lean into him, placing a soft kiss onto his lips, “What's so bad about a baby Jadon?” you whisper against his lips. 

“stop it, ill need to take you upstairs.” He smiled into you as you kiss once again.

-

A few days later you hadn't been sick quite as often but you were still feeling extremally tired. You both had joked over these days that you were pregnant. 

“We will call it Jadon if its a boy.” Jadon laughed in bed one night. 

You roll your eyes at the memory. Jadon was at training again today, so you had a few free hours to yourself. This is when you decided its probably best to go check if you were actually pregnant. Tiredness wasn't a sign of food poisoning. 

You finally convince yourself to get up and actually wash. You put on some comfy clothes on, which consisted of a Nike jogger set with a white crop top. You sprits some of your favourite perfume before leaving the house and getting into your car.

You drove to the nearest pharmacy, you chose there instead of a supermarket due to the possibility of being spotted. You quickly move in and out, getting the pregnancy test and getting right back into your car.

Instantly as you get home, your into the downstairs toilet, pee on the stick and then place it down so you can contemplate what your next steps could be. The three minutes drag by, your checking the clock every 20 seconds thinking that it’s been minutes.

Eventually it’s over, the alarm went off and you pick up the pregnancy test and turn it round.

Pregnant. 6-7 weeks.

Well fucking shit. You are actually pregnant. How the fuck do I tell Jadon now. You click your/friends/name and the phone begins to ring, awaiting for her to answer.

As soon as she answers you say, “I’m pregnant.”

Her face instantly falls, mouth in the shape of a ‘o’. “Shut up.”

You give her a slight smile, “Am I happy about this? I ain’t sure. But I’m not sad.”

“Have you told Jadon yet?” She asked, mouth now covered by her hand.

You shake your head, “No. I’ve literally just found out, he’s at training.”

“Fuck,” she breathed, “how are you gonna tell him.”

You shrug, as you hear the front door open, with your eyes wide, “He’s here, fuck. I’ll phone you later.”

You step outside into the hall way, where he’s taking off his shoes, placing his keys down on the table by the door.

“You okay?” He asked, beginning to unzip his jumper.

You began to get a bit nervous, you imagined planning a gift to give to him all the times you had imagined a family with him before. You imagined him freaking out for real this time.

“I’m pregnant.” You say bluntly, handing over the stick you had pee’d on minutes earlier. He took the test from your hands staring it for a few seconds. You were beginning to panic, maybe this wasn’t something he wanted?

You continued to stare at him until he looked up at you, a proud smile on his face. “I love you.” He spoke, pulling you in with your hands as he embraced your body.

“I love you too.” You whisper, as he placed a kiss onto your lips.

“Baby Sancho.” He added, and you both burst into laughter.

[capricorn-stark]

Othello Pt 2

pairing: jason todd x reader, reader is a psych major because i think the concept of psych majors in Gotham is funny lmao

warning: i wrote this at 1 am again, kinda long, swearing

a/n: i mention Dana Harlowe and Annie B’s diner, they’re both from RHATO’s final two issues lol. still dedicated to @tadpole-san even though she hate crimed me 

part 1

“I thought you said you wanted to get coffee,” you started when you noticed Jason veering away from where your regular coffee shop should’ve been, choosing to cut through the street and venture to a different path entirely. “Because you just-”

“Yeah, I know, I’m hungry,” he declared, slipping his hands into his pockets and tilting his head towards another row of stores illuminated with neon-lights and flickering street lamps. “This place has better stuff than overpriced coffee, promise.” You let out an exaggerated gasp of shock at that notion and he laughed, nudging your shoulder with his. 

It was always strange to be walking around Gotham during the night, but with Jason by your side, it was far less worrying than it usually was. On your own, you couldn’t even imagine traveling around the dark streets littered with muggers, petty thieves, and the occasional evil clown prince or two - one minute, you’d be speed-walking down the streets, the next minute you could end up as the lucky winner of Scarecrow’s fear-gas testing special.

You actually knew someone who had been in that very situation. They were in Arkham now.

With Jason, it was almost ridiculous how much safer you felt. It didn’t take a whole lot of observational skills to notice how the men who usually leered at you and your friends when you passed shrank and slipped into the shadows when a man over 6 feet in height and built like a tank walked past them. Jason himself was in a good mood tonight, his shoulders relaxed and a slight smile playing at his lips while he told you about the local theatrical-adaptation of Othello that was currently under production near Gotham University. 

You were getting used to seeing him like this - not so moody, smiling, present - but you had also noticed the expressions he had when no one was looking, when he wasn’t thinking about anything in particular, when his gaze had a certain intensity to them that you hadn’t ever quite seen before. He didn’t really like talking about himself or his life, preferring to keep conversations centered around school or you. The few times you had tried asking about his family and work had all led to him clamming up and quickly dropping the subject, his body language rigid and completely closed-off, the crease by his brows deepening as his expression transformed into a scowl. It was the first time you realized that Jason Todd could actually be genuinely scary - and the first time you realized there was a much, much darker side of him that you weren’t sure if you wanted to see.

You knew it wasn’t your place to pry, and you had never brought it up since - but you couldn’t help but wonder just what had happened to make someone like him so angry. 

“...and I figured we could - did you just zone out on me?”

You snapped back into attention at his rather dramatic tone, flinching out of your character analysis to pay actual mind to the man in question himself. 

“No, I just-” 

“Yeah? What did I just say?” Jason challenged, grasping your arm to pull you away from the traffic lane you had nearly walked right into. His disbelieving expression made your face burn red - but much to your relief (and embarrassment), he was laughing. 

“I’m sorry, I wasn’t completely zoned out-” 

“After you literally walked into traffic? Yeah, I can tell,” he deadpanned, tugging you towards him right as the cars slowed to a halt, the pedestrian signal blinking above you. The sudden action and the sudden closeness made your face heat up - something he apparently noticed when his bright green eyes flickered across your features and caused a smirk to tug at his lips. Instead of the teasing you had braced yourself for, you watched as he tilted his head towards the diner across the street, letting go of your arm. “It’s right over there, c’mon.” 

He was already moving towards the crosswalk when you shook yourself out of your stupor, quickly moving to catch up with him and glancing up at the diner. The big glowing red letters on the sign beside it read “Annie B’s”. 

“They got good food,” he explained at your questioning look, leaning forwards to swing the door open for you. “I used to hang around here a lot when I was a kid.” 

“I don’t think I’ve actually seen this place before,” you commented, entering and hearing Jason close the door behind him, taking a quick glance around before you took a seat in one of the cherry-red and white leather booths. “Kinda wish I had.”

The entire diner had a vintage touch to it, from the luminescent pink and blue lights lining the ceilings to the multicolored tile floors, the cherry-red barstools, and even the jukebox in the corner cranking out old-timey tunes. There were only a few other people sitting at the bar and chilling in a booth a few down from your own, all too absorbed in their own worlds to pay much mind to the two of you. You could hear the sizzling of the food being made back in the kitchen, emitting a heavenly aroma that made your stomach growl not-so subtly. Jason laughed as he slid down across from you, sliding one delicate paper menu over as he scanned over the other. 

“Pretty cool, huh? And like I said, they got great food.” He nodded at your stomach and you rolled your eyes, eliciting another laugh from him. “Knock yourself out, ‘cus dinner’s on me.” Before you could open your mouth to object, the kitchen doors flew open and a woman stepped out holding a heaping tray of food. 

“One chicken fried steak with a side of mashed potatoes and rings,” she announced as she set down the trays in front of a man sitting a few booths down, already moving to refill his glass with a pitcher of water. “Enjoy your dinner, Phil.” 

“Thanks, Dana,” the man told her as he picked up his fork and gave her a crooked-toothed grin, already digging into his food. “Always do.” 

“I sure hope so,” the lady agreed, moving to walk back towards the kitchen before catching sight of them. She broke into a grin at the sight of Jason sending her a playful salute, changing course to head towards their booth instead. “Well, look who it is!” she exclaimed, securing her curly black hair out of her face with an orange-and-green bandana as she stopped in front of them. “Jason Todd decided to drop by for a little visit, did he? And he brought a friend.” 

The sight of her beaming at you was too contagious for you to not smile back up at her in return.

“Hi, Dana,” Jason grinned, nodding at you as she looked between the two of you. “This is Y/N. Y/N, Dana Harlowe. Her dad runs this place.” 

“It’s so nice to meet you,” Dana told you with another grin, leaning forwards to shake your hand in greeting. “When I decided to help out at the diner tonight, I wasn’t expecting a miracle. I definitely didn’t think this boy would ever walk in here with a date of all things-”

“Oh as if,” Jason scoffed loudly as the two of you laughed, face reddening beneath the bright colored lights. “Have you seen me? I was born a lady-killer.” He shot you a wink and you sent him another playful eye roll.

“Yeah, you sure killed me alright.” Dana burst out laughing again as Jason immediately let out a protest of betrayal at your words.

“I like you,” she decided when she finally managed to straighten, taking out her notepad and pen with another brilliant smile. “Did y’all decide what you wanted yet, or do you need another minute?” Jason glanced over at you and you nodded back up at her.

“Sure, I’m ready.” 

Dana headed back into the kitchen for your food after you ordered, leaving the two of you to sit in a comfortable, familiar silence, the sound of forks scraping against porcelain plates and vintage beats being the only disruptors. 

“I used to hear these songs on Gotham City Radio all the time,” Jason finally began after taking a sip of his water, fixating his gaze back on you as he crossed his arms over his chest and leaned back against the leather seat. “Growing up, I mean. I still do, sometimes.” 

“Classic jazz?” You grinned, taking a small sip of your own water in turn. “You? I didn’t get that vibe from you.” He chuckled and rubbed the back of his neck with a slight shrug.

“At my old place, I had, uh, a butler. He wasn’t really a butler, honestly, he was more like a dad than anything. Or, like, a really cool grandpa. He had a whole rack of guns and shit he kept polished in this big cabinet thing-” You raised a brow, attempting to hide your amusement by taking another sip of water. You were a little surprised that he had actually started talking about his family at all - you weren’t about to ruin it, and boy, did you want to know more about the guy. “And he used to play that station all the time at home, GC Radio Classics. I guess I kinda missed hearing it.” 

“He does sound pretty cool,” you admitted with a smile, setting the glass back down. “Do you still visit him?” Jason hesitated a few moments before attempting a nonchalant shrug. You noticed the tightness in his body language again, the same sort of tightness you saw when he was closing up around you. 

“Not much anymore,” he finally said, letting his shoulders drop a little bit. “It’s been...a while. Just got some shit going on.” You watched him take another drink before you spoke again.

“If you ever want to talk about it with me - or talk about anything, really - you can, Jason.” It wasn’t just the products of your psych major showing through you - you meant your words, and the slight smile playing at his lips seemed to signal that he had understood that as well. 

“Don’t worry about it, seriously. But thanks.” You nodded, looking up again when the kitchen doors flew open once again, Dana heading out towards your table with another two trays heaped with mouth-watering food. 

“And here you go,” she smiled as she set your respective meals down before you, taking your glasses to refill them as well. “Enjoy your food, you two. Call me over if there’s anything else you need, yeah?” You both thanked Dana as she sashayed away again, letting the doors swing shut behind her once again after checking up on the rest of her customers. 

Neither of you wasted any time digging into the food as soon as it appeared, finishing most of it in mere minutes like the starving university students you were, breaking the silence with the occasional offer at trying something the other had gotten. The aroma had been no false-alarm - it tasted even better than you had anticipated, and that was certainly saying something. Savory fries, buttery biscuits, and smoky burgers were better than anything else you had in a while. 

“How did I not find this place sooner?” you sighed as you pressed a napkin to your lips, leaning back against your seat as you tried to process just how full you really felt. At this rate, you would have to roll your way out of the place. “I know you said it was gonna be good, but I didn’t expect it to be this good.”

“I told you,” Jason grinned as he finished up the last of his burger and fries, crumpling up his own napkins and setting them into the tray to throw away. “I know good food places! I grew up around these streets.”

“So did I!” you protested as he laughed and stood up to throw all the trash away, setting the trays back where they were supposed to go and pulling out his wallet just as Dana appeared by the kitchen’s window with two milkshakes. 

“You can count these on the house,” she told him as she slid them over, ignoring his protests and sending you a wink as you stood up from the booth as well. “Enjoy your night - and it was real nice meeting you, Y/N. Todd, I better be seeing you around more often.” 

“Yes ma’am,” he deadpanned, his smile warm as she waved them out anyways. “Thanks, Dana.” 

You called out a thanks to her as well, tightening your jacket around you as you left the warmth of the diner and felt the chill of Gotham’s dreary night hit you once more. Jason handed you your milkshake, bringing his own straw to his lips and taking a sip. 

“You guys seem close,” you noted with a smile as you took a sip yourself, relishing the cold, sweet taste of the shake in delight. Jason chuckled at that, shrugging as you walked along the illuminated sidewalks in no particular direction. 

“She’s like an annoying sister to me. I’ve known her since I was a puny kid.” You watched as the corners of his mouth curled into a slight smile as he took another sip. “Dana, her sister, and her dad were good to me growing up. They’re great people.”

That, you had been able to tell just from meeting the woman herself. 

“I liked meeting her. She was pretty cool.” He chuckled again and spared you another glance. “And thanks, by the way, for dinner tonight. It really was really good. And way better than just coffee.”

“I told you,” he grinned, flickering those brilliant green eyes across your face again. “I know where the good spots around Gotham are. We don’t have a lot of them, but when we do have them, they’re pretty damn good.” That elicited a laugh from you and Jason stopped beneath one of the streetlamps lining the sidewalk. 

“You did better than I expected, Todd.” He made a big show of popping his collar and scoffing at your comment.

“What, you expected me to not impress you? Do you think that low of me?” 

“That theatre minor of yours is really starting to make an entrance, you can put it away now-” 

“Hey!” You burst out laughing and he couldn’t help but join. You felt pretty sure that he looked the happiest right then and there than you had ever really seen him - whatever that might’ve meant. Pretty soon, your laughter was residing and he had taken a slight step forwards, a cheeky grin still plastered on his face. “I’m glad you enjoyed yourself.” 

You looked back up at him with a nonchalant shrug despite fighting back another smile yourself. 

“Yeah, it was a pretty good night.” His gaze flickered towards your lips before settling back on your face. 

“Yeah?” The sounds of honking cars and the murmurs of people walking past all around you felt like they were being drowned out somehow when you felt him get a little bit closer. The smile tugged at the corner of your mouth again.

“Yeah.” Another moment passed before Jason finally closed the distance between you, meeting your lips in a surprisingly gentle kiss for a man who looked like he could snap a baseball bat with his bare hands. You wrapped your arms around his neck after yet another moment, feeling him draw you even closer to him at the action. 

Literally and figuratively, it was a sweet kiss. The milkshake truly had done wonders. 

You were a little breathless when he finally pulled away, and you hoped the shitty streetlight would keep him from seeing just how red your face had gone. Jason was grinning at your reaction, rubbing the back of his neck.

“C’mon, that was better than pretty good.”

“Shut up,” you told him immediately, swatting his arm and moving to continue your walk again as he laughed and easily moved to catch up to you, slinging an arm around your shoulders.

“It was! You gotta admit it, that was pretty great-”

“Shut up, Jason.” 

Just like that, once again, you had Othello of all things to thank for your night. Maybe, just maybe, it hadn’t been such a terrible book after all. 

[puppyluver256]

[Image Description: A fan-made Pokemon resembling an oval-shaped cartoon chicken. It has tan feathers with red on the wing tips, red eyes, white and red feathers on its front resembling an apron, brown and white feathers on its legs resembling fried chicken drumsticks, yellow tail feathers resembling french fries, and a tall white comb resembling a chef’s hat. It has one wing extended in a “presenting” or “directing” sort of manner. Orange text outlined in light blue in the top left corner of the image reads “Buffabresse”. End ID.]

—–

Buffabresse - Poultry Pokemon - fire/flying Chefs across Cantessy always keep a Buffabresse on hand, as meat cooked in its flame has quite the rich flavor without requiring extra spices. / This Pokemon roasts its food with its internal flame before eating, partly to aid digestion, but mostly to improve the flavor. As such, they have become an essential kitchen helper.

More Cantessy Pokemon, and back to completely new regional Pokemon rather than just another variant of a pre-existing one! If there are only four things that people think of when they think of Kentucky, you’ll probably get answers like bluegrass music and the derby, maybe the Mammoth Cave system, but mostly you’re gonna get one big reason: Kentucky Fried Chicken. So of COURSE I had to make a Pokemon inspired by that. I know we already have fire-type chickens with Hoenn’s fire starter and evos, but Buffabresse is clearly different. Tried to pull in references to different types of fried food in the design, mostly chicken for obvious reasons but also the tail feathers are meant to look like french fries. And since the joke here is that they’re a chicken that fries rather than a chicken that gets fried, I wanted to make them look like a lil chef! :D I still think people would eat fried chicken, but like actual chicken and not their Buffabresse buddies, I think that regular animals exist in the extended Pokemon universe because how else in-universe would you be able to list things as the “chicken Pokemon” or the “mouse Pokemon” or any other Pokemon categorized as being similar to a real-world animal, hehe. …also I guess you can imagine what my upcoming fire-type Gym Leader is like… :3c

(and yes, I know about the Cozy Fried Kitchen thing that shows up as one of Leon’s sponsors in SwSh, now shuuuush ;3 )

Reminder that if anyone wants to suggest moves for any Cantessy Fakemon to learn and some physical stats where I haven’t yet figured them out, feel free to throw ‘em at me :3 Links to their info pages will be provided in the replies!

💖🐶 Check out my pinned post for ways to support my artwork, among other things! 🐶💖

~If you like, please reblog to show your friends! Likes are appreciated, but reblogs let more people see my content! If you have something to say, feel free to give feedback in tags/comments/replies as well!~

Pokemon and related concepts © Nintendo/GameFreak Buffabresse, the Cantessy region, and artwork © PuppyLuver Studios

[lovemesomesurveys]

Ever had a friend online for a long time without seeing a photo of them? Yeah. When you did see a photo, was it how you'd imagined them? Some were, some weren’t. Some I never did see a photo of. The last time you threw up, what caused it? I think it was a stomach bug. If you saw Rent Live on Fox, did you like Valentina as Angel? I didn’t watch it. Did you have any foreign exchange students at your high school? Yeah.

Did they have favorite foods from your country they'd never had before? I have no idea. I didn’t meet/know any of them. Any foods from other countries you would like to try but haven't yet? I’m blanking at the moment, but yeah I’m sure. I am quite picky, though. Has bad weather ever prevented you from getting to work? -- Do you think the world would be more peaceful without any religion? No. Have you ever internet stalked anybody? Not in a creepy way, but I’ve looked at people’s profiles. Do you think sage smells like marijuana? (Some people do.) I’ve never thought that. Are you ever guilty of hypocrisy? Everyone is. Have you kept the same icon here for a long time? On Tumblr, yeah. Why did you choose your icon, anyway? This one I have currently is the grumpy Carebear and I just feel like that’s me cause I’m always so moody and irritable. Have you ever made any friends through Bzoink? No. I’ve never interacted with anyone on there. Would you like to make any friends through Bzoink? I just wanna find some surveys to take, I’m not looking for anything else. Any fun facts (on any topic) you'd like to share? No. Did you ever watch Labyrinth? Nope. Could you ever see anybody other than Bowie as Jareth? -- Does it hurt your feelings when people talk shit about things you love? I mean, it’s kinda shitty if someone shits all over something that brings you joy. Is there anything you have a chip on your shoulder about? Probably nowadays since I’m always so irritable and my patience is quite thin. Do you like it when people give you nicknames? I only have like two, but yeah I’m open to nicknames. When you make friends, are you usually the one to 'make the first move'? No. What fandoms are you in? A few different ones. Are there any fandoms you used to be in, but left? Yes. Do you ship anybody in your fandoms? Yeah. If so, what is your OTP? Your NoTP? I have several from the different shows I watch. Do you more often feel superior or inferior to others? Inferior. I don’t feel superior at all. What kind of pasta is your favorite? Pesto. Do you like beef jerky? I used to really like peppered beef jerky back when I could have spicy stuff. Do you prefer ruffly or regular potato chips? Ruffly. What smells remind you of your childhood? Play-Doh always comes to mind. Do you write down your own recipes, or just commit them to memory? I save ‘em to my phone and/or Pinterest. I’m not a cook or baker, but if I come across something that looks appealing I’ll save it for inspo for someone else I know to make for me or something like it. Can you do any impressions? Nah. What color do you want to dye your hair? I miss my red. Do you have a 'meet cute' story with your partner or friend? I’ve never heard of a “meet cute” story. Did you know A Star is Born was technically a remake? (There have been many versions of it.) Yes. How do you like your chicken? In the form of a boneless wing, chicken tender, or shredded. White meat only. Do you enjoy cheese fries? Yeah. Do you eat refried beans? Yeah, whenever I have a burrito. What is a food you enjoy, but don't have very often? Nowadays I really only have the same few foods and I eat them often in rotation. Some I have everyday. Marilyn Monroe or Audrey Hepburn? Why? Nothing against either one I just never was into either of them. There was a time back in my day where it seemed like everyone loved Marilyn Monroe. Favorite fictional world? Ooh. One that came to mind first is Stars Hollow. Do you like fuzzy socks? I don’t really wear ‘em. Do you wear slippers all the time in the winter? I don’t wear slippers. Do you use lint rollers often? No. Do you carry pepper spray? I do. Have you ever had to use it? No. Have you ever been kicked out of a public place? Why? No. Best thing to do during a power outage? Read or play a game. Or sleep, ha. Has your power ever gone out for more than a day? No, fortunately. At most just a couple hours. Art posters and tees where they have put tattoos and piercings on Old Hollywood stars -- yay or nay? Some look cool. Actually, I like seeing the ones done on Disney characters. Do you have/have you ever had an unusual pet? No. My doggo is pretty goofy, though. haha. Do you donate to any associations that care for animals? I have. What keeps you coming back to Bzoink? Surveys?

[tomfooleryandclownishshenanigans]

A LITTLE INFO ABOUT EARTH 8 1/2'S JOKER (with a little bit of commentary from the man himself in "[]" and from the mod in "{}")

Name: Jack Anschel "The Joker" Napier [Yes, my middle name is 'Anschel'. It's a very common and desirable Jewish name, so shut your trap]

Nicknames and Aliases: Clown, Chuckles, Red Nose [It is NOT red, so stop calling me that, VICTOR], J, JJ, Mistah J [Ew], Lady Tomfool, The Clown Prince of Crime [My personal favorite], The Ace of Knaves, The Jester of Genocide, The Harlequin of Hate, The Man Who Laughs, Puddin' [Again, eeeeeeeeew]

Age: 29

Date of Birth: April 25, 1992 [Referencessssssss...]

Pronouns: Any [You can call me whatever you like; I still will likely never acknowledge your existence, but at least you gave it a try]

Gender: [Would you believe me if I said I was a cabbage?] {He's genderqueer [I got this from @harleyquinnade on Instagram]}

Orientation: [No comment] {While it's safe to say that he's probably bi/pan/omniromantic (with a preference for masculine traits) and graysexual and/or s*x shy, he's still experimenting a bit}

Height: 6'6"[Well, 6'5" and fifteen sixteenths, but why be technical?]

Weight: 180 lbs [...of pure muscle]

Eye Color: One green eye, one purple eye with a white pupil {It's unclear whether his eyes are actually like this or if he just wears contacts for the aesthetic}

Hair Color: Toxic green {...with five pounds of hair gel in it} [How dare you!? There are only 3, tops]

Other Aspects of Appearance: The Joker's features are so chiseled that they could likely chop someone in half. He always meticulously styles his frizzy mop of hair every morning to keep it up to par with the rest of him, but it still miraculously ends up sticking out everywhere anyhow. He can usually be found in one of his many gaudy, purple suits, his go-to choice of outfit ever since his... accident. Even though his lips are red enough on their own, he still wears lipstick and usually some eyeliner and eyeshadow.

Face Claim: A mix between Anthony Misiano in cosplay, a younger, clean-shaven Cesar Romero; and the drawings you've seen of him on this blog [Yes indeed; I'm a looker] {You're a twink, too} [And your point is...? That means that I'm extra attractive, doesn't it?]

Voice Claim: A mix between Harry Houdini and Cesar Romero {Imagine a voice that's mostly in the middle in terms of tone, but is a little on the deeper side. It has this sultry, Old Hollywood feel to it and would remind one of someone one might have a conversation with at one of Gatsby's lavish parties}

Likes: Blood, Gore, Stand-up comedy, A nice, expensive suit; Every Stooge but Shemp, Chaos, Frank Sinatra, Prince, Singing [No, I certainly do NOT like singing! Wherever did you get that idea...?], Butterscotch suckers, Club soda, Cream Soda, Orange Soda, Doritos [Nacho Cheese, not Cool Ranch], Sandwiches, [BATMAN], [Messing with Batman's little birdies], [My favorite armchair], etc.

Dislikes: A Clean and organized workspace {His living habits are as chaotic as his personality}, Bad gags, Germs, Stupidity, Copycats [Here's looking at you, EDWARD], Most human contact, The Scarecrow, Catwoman, [DAMIAN WAYNE], etc.

Favorite Weapons: Switchblade, Bare hands, Tommy gun, Six-shooter {regular and/or extra-long}, Rubber chicken {Don't ask}

Parents: [Which story would you prefer? I have at least six good ones]

Other Relations: Jessica Darron {former foster mother}, Daniel Darron {former foster father (six feet under)}, Lucy Quinzel {daughter}, Bruce Wayne [Nananananananana, Batmannnnn...], Edward "The Riddler" Nygma [former flame], Lex Luthor [also a former flame], John Constantine [don't ask], Oswald "The Penguin" Cobblepot [it was just one date], Robert "Geraldo" Ricci [My right-hand man and NOTHING MORE] {He thinks you're hot} [No, he doesn't!], Alexis "Punchline" Kaye {the Joker's main henchwoman and Lucy's "aunt"}, Harleen "Harley Quinn" Quinzel [{Ahhhhhhh...}]

{NOTE: I know that some of this information is a repeat of other posts. I just thought that compiling all of this information in one place would make things easier for anyone looking to roleplay with him}

[notcanoncompliant]

Make It Better

Starker College!AU; Student!Peter/Professor!Tony (another excuse for me to write the word ‘panties’ repeatedly) (sorry not sorry)

****

Something’s off about Peter. Tony notices as soon as the kid steps into the lecture hall, and it only becomes more obvious as Tony actually gets the presentation going.

His favorite student (sue him, every professor has one) is hardly participating, and though he’s still obviously paying attention throughout, typing notes up as he goes, all of his usual enthusiasm is just…gone. He looks tired, or maybe sad.

Tony doesn’t think about how frequently he’s glancing over to check until Peter looks up and their eyes lock. The younger’s flare just slightly, and Tony feels like he’s been caught doing something he shouldn’t. Especially when a bloom of pink spreads across Peter’s cheeks.

He doesn’t check on him again for the rest of the lecture.

But he worries.

*

After he’s dismissed everyone and the students are filing out of the hall, Tony makes a decision.

“Parker, stay behind for a minute.”

Something in him is too satisfied at the way Peter halts almost immediately at the sound of his voice, stopping hard enough that he rocks forward slightly.

All the times Tony’s pulled Peter aside before this have been exercises in both self-restraint and masochism. The twenty-something is made of sunlight, brightness leaking out of his pores, and watching that split second of supernova excitement burst across his features when Tony tells him to stay is the instructor’s most guilty pleasure.

This time, though, there’s a quick spark, a flash of the light Tony’s (hoping for) familiar with, and then anxiety, and then the kid just looks…flat. Forcibly so. Like he’s hiding something.

The door closes behind the last retreating body, and then it’s just them in the empty lecture hall.

Tony moves to lean against the front of his desk, braces his palms against the wooden edge.

“Alright, kid,” he says, raising one hand to gesture vaguely at Peter, who’s stopped a few feet in front of him, “what’s up? You seemed pretty off today. Distracted.“

Peter winces, his eyes skittering down and away for a second before he looks back at the instructor.

"I’m sorry, Mr. Stark, I–it’s nothing, I didn’t mean to get–I still took notes, I wasn’t just–”

“Okay, Peter, breathe,” Tony soothes, “I’m not trying to berate you. You’re usually a little more active participation-wise, I wanted to check up on you. That’s all.”

He has to fight the urge to physically comfort Peter when those doe eyes (those eyes, those regular, normal eyes that Tony only ever notices as such) go pained and disbelieving and hopeful before the feelings are again poorly shuttered away.

“You don’t have to worry about me, Mr. Stark,” Peter says, smiling unconvincingly while the knuckles on the hand holding his bag strap turn white, “it’s nothing, just–just life stuff. I’ll be–it’ll be fine in a couple days. Tomorrow! Tomorrow, I’ll be fine tomorrow, participating and everything!”

Tony needs to accept defeat and let him go, bad poker face and all, but a not-good-very-bad voice in the back of his mind is muttering to him about the returned blush on Peter’s face. It’s making him think a little too much about the uncharacteristic unwillingness to share.

They’ve talked about things that aren’t related to curriculum in their frequent after-class discussions. Life comes up; they know some basic things about each other–favorite takeout, least favorite movies, places they grew up, etc.–and some things that are maybe not so basic–names of best friends, stories of first pets, how often they visit their parents, and so on.

But this is the first time he’s seen Peter so…flustered.

Thankfully (yes, thankfully) Tony’s conscience prevails and he decides not to push.

“Okay. Alright. But if you ever do need to talk to someone, my door’s always open.”

He gives Peter a quick smile he hopes is as comforting as he means it to be, pushes off the desk and circles back around to his seat. 

He’s proud of himself, he really is, Tony thinks while he blindly shuffles through some papers. Resisted temptation. Kept things on neutral ground. Breached no bound–

“My boyfriend dumped me.”

Tony freezes, his fingers flexing involuntarily. The crinkle of paper is loud in the spacious, empty room.

Okay.

“That’s rough, I’m sorry,” Tony says, suddenly wishing he had something to drink. Water. Juice. Scotch.

He looks up at Peter with what he hopes is more empathy than the inappropriate excitement he’s feeling over the development, but he’s suddenly a lot less concerned with what his own face is doing when he sees Peter’s expression.

The kid’s not even looking at him, just staring off to the side with this heartbreaking shame written across his features.

“I…” Peter’s throat clicks when he swallows, “I told him about something I…like. And he, um…”

Oh, man. Oh, no.

“…he called me a pervert,” Peter says, quietly, “and I know it’s not a big–I mean, the word’s kind of a joke…but, he really meant it, you know? There’s a difference, when someone says it and they really think you’re–” he pauses, frowns tightly. “What I–it’s not even anything bad, not gross or illegal. And I know it’s not, but…for a second…”

Tony’s heart fucking shatters for him. There’s nothing quite like being genuinely kink-shamed for the first time, especially by someone you thought you could trust. For someone as genuinely sweet and kind as Peter, it would be completely implosive. He remembers similar devastation, hates seeing the confused, questioning pain on Peter’s face, the self-doubt.

He resists the compulsion to ask what, exactly, Peter likes.

“I’m sorry. That’s really shitty,” he says instead.

Tony doesn’t typically curse in front of his students (has to keep up appearances of professionalism somehow), and he preens internally when Peter huffs a surprised laugh. It’s a nice moment, both of them wrapped in shared experience (even if one party’s unaware), uplifted by just a hint of levity. Very Chicken Soup for the Secret Kinky Soul–

“Do you–,” Peter starts, blushing slightly, “–can I tell you what it is? It’d be nice to hear it’s, you know, not actually weird?” He’s squirming a little, his eyes dancing away again with nerves.

Tony might actually die. Rolling himself back a bit from the desk, he takes a breath and pastes on his last-ditch effort at an encouraging, platonic, smile. Slouches casually against the backrest of his chair.

“If you feel comfortable sharing, then shoot.”

He’s going for ‘mentorly’, he swears. This is definitely an appropriate conversation to have with his student. Definitely. Yes.

After a beat of silence, Peter shifts. Takes a breath. Swallows.

“I like…um. I like wearing pant–” the kid chokes a little, flushes darker, “I like wearing women’s underwear.”

“Ah,” Tony says. He tries to covertly lace his fingers together over the vicinity of ‘just below his belt’ and only succeeds in drawing Peter’s eye to where his hands have disappeared.

Before Peter’s eyes flip back up to meet his, Tony sees the kid’s tongue peek out to wet his lips in a subconscious motion.

Clearing his throat, Tony brings his hands up from his lap to fold them on the desk, leans forward. Watches the anticipation and uncertainty dance across Peter’s face. Hopes he’s coming off more supportive than interested.

“It’s not weird, Pete. It’s…not. Don’t worry about that.”

It feels hypocritical; essentially telling Peter not to think much of it, when Tony is going to have an impossible time thinking about anything else. He’s trying hard not to think about it right now, trying to avoid imagining clinging lace, or satin, or silk, stretched over Peter’s–

“Can I show you?”

Tony absently approves of the phrasing; that he’s being offered a gift, that this is something Peter wants to give him. The response he knows he should give is something along the lines of 'that’s not appropriate’, but the only one banging around in his head is a resounding YES PLEASE. 

When he gives up and nods in the affirmative, Peter slides his bag off his shoulder.

Tony’s expecting him to pull out his phone, maybe show him some pictures. Apparently, Tony’s going to have to re-examine his take on reality, because Peter does not pull out his phone.

The brunet lowers his bag to the floor and starts taking off his jacket.

Tony’s frozen, again, as the jacket hits the carpet beside the already discarded laptop bag. Frozen, twice in one day. Twice in less than an hour. Peter is a fucking trip. He’s a dream, he’s a hallucination–

–that will be immediately visible if anyone were to open the lecture hall door.

Peter seems to realize it at the same time. He’s across the room in a couple of seconds, reaching for the door handle, pausing for a beat…and locking them in together.

It feels a little like someone snaps their fingers in Tony’s face.

He’s about to let one of his students–his favorite student–basically give him a striptease. In his classroom. It’s beyond 'inappropriate’. This is something Peter should be exploring with other twenty-somethings, not a professor fifteen years his senior–

But…Peter had tried to explore it with someone else, hadn’t he?

“Mr. Stark,” Peter says, suddenly, “Is this okay?”

The younger man’s back in place, like he’d never moved at all, but now he’s shyly lifting the hem of his t-shirt with one hand and undoing the front closure of his jeans with the other, and Tony’s eyes lock onto the peekaboo of fire-engine red now visible beneath the worn denim.

“Yeah, Pete,” he says, voice rasping slightly, “It’s okay.”

Everyone has a breaking point, Tony reasons as he stares at the picture in front of him. There’s only so much he could possibly endure before letting go, and apparently his threshold’s pretty low when it comes to Peter; a few seconds of crepe paper resistance.

He stands slowly, comes around the desk. Peter doesn’t move, just watches him, brittle-sharp hope in his eyes. Tony’s aware he’s moving like Peter’s a frightened animal, and his brain both shies from and reaches towards how this could make him the hunter, more so than the awed observer. Though he is definitely both.

The way the kid’s chest heaves slightly on a sharp inhale, the way his lips part just barely when Tony lowers to his knees in front of him, are just more gifts, more memories Tony wants to etch into his brain and play on loop. He plans on showing just how grateful he is.

Peter’s flushing a lot brighter, but he’s not pulling away; he just pulls the zipper open a little further, revealing more of the delicate pattern that overlays Peter’s pale, smooth skin.

“Can I touch you? Kiss you?” Tony asks, voice rough

Peter gives him a shaky but enthusiastic 'yes, please’.

Tony groans and reaches for him, tugs the denim waistband down a couple inches and pulls Peter gently forward by the hips so he can drag his lips along the line where that softly-defined vee of muscle disappears under the thin lace. Peter’s hand slides into his hair, and Tony hums in approval as he presses drawn out kisses into the skin of Peter’s stomach.

When Tony grabs two generous handfuls of Peter’s ass and squeezes, those tentative, sweet fingers tighten reflexively.

“This is–you look edible, Pete. I’m so lucky you’re letting me see you like this.”

“Yeah?” Peter asks, breathless and wide-eyed when Tony looks up.

“Yes, sweetheart. Beautiful. Gorgeous…” He punctuates each word with another brush of lips to the border of lace and skin. 

He smells lightly musky and male through the delicate fabric, his cock hard and hot underneath.

Shutting his eyes, Tony gets lost in nuzzling at Peter, murmuring sweet nonsense, nipping and kissing and dipping lower, reveling in lightly musky male scent through the delicate fabric. Peter’s cock is hard and hot, and Tony can’t help but lave his tongue over the swollen head, humming when Peter shivers against him.

He pulls back to both attempt to calm down and check on how Peter’s doing; he hadn’t meant to get so worshippy–

When he looks up, he feels like his chest is caving in. Peter’s on the verge of tears, eyes red-rimmed and wet, and Tony pushes to stand.

“God, Pete, I’m sorry–”

He’s cut off with a muffled 'mmph’ when Peter grabs his shirt and yanks him down for a kiss. It’s short and hard and desperate, and when it’s over, Peter pulls away enough that Tony can see the almost-panic on his face.

“I–Mr. Stark, thank you, please don’t apologize, please don’t say it was a mistake, it felt so good, you felt so good, I don’t want to stop, I’ll stop crying, I promise–”

For a second, Tony’s furious with whoever made Peter believe he has to apologize for his tears (wonders if it’s the same dipshit who said no to Peter Parker in fucking panties), but Tony’s anger won’t help anything right now. He reels in his questions, and instead reaches up with one hand to swipe the fresh-fallen tears from Peter’s cheeks, a move that stops the flow of anxious word-vomit.

“If you want more, I want to give you more,” Tony says, using his free arm to wrap Peter’s waist and tug him gently forward. “I want you to have the world, kid.”

It’s too honest–Tony’s being way too honest right now; months of feelings and want trying to break free–but he’s not about to stop. Not when Peter’s staring up at him with heartbreaking, careful hope. 

Lowering his head, Tony presses a kiss to the corner of Peter’s jaw, murmurs his next words into his ear. 

“You’re amazing, Peter. So brilliant. So sweet.” He drops both hands to slide down Peter’s hips and around to the small of his back, slips his fingers just under the lace, drags them back and forth along the soft skin just above the curve of his ass as Peter arches against him with a shaky gasp.“That you look like a wet dream right now is really just a bonus.”

“Mr. Stark…” Peter breathes, surprised, his flush deepening.

Tony’s going to have to tell Peter to use his first name at some point, but he’s a little too selfish to do it right now, when the moniker sends a bolt of liquid heat swooping low in his stomach.

“And you’re going to make a mess in these for me,” he continues, tugging at the panties, “because I want you to feel good. Because you deserve to feel good.”

Peter’s staring up at him with a sweeter version of the supernova Tony loves, tentative hope and anticipation and want.

“Come on, sweetheart,” Tony says, tilting his head down to brush a kiss across Peter’s lips, “let me make you feel good. Let me make it better.”

***

@the-amazing-spidertwink, @starkercrossedlovers

[irondad-not-ironsad]

WandaVision Episode 1 Reaction

Spoilers below!!

I enjoy the music over the marvel logo

But also a 43 second logo feels kinda long for a 29 minute episode- is it just for the premier or is this gonna happen before each ep?

Also I’m pretty sure I’ve heard that there is a title sequence, which will probably be similar in length. Combine that with the lengthy credits people have been complaining about, it seems that the percentage of the thirty minutes that is actually the story is lower than it should be

not that I don’t love a good title sequence! But I’ll take a well fleshed out episode over fancy logos, title sequences and credits any day

now that I’ve got that of my chest, on to the actual show

I like how they have the frame shaped like that of an old timey tv, combined with the black and white it really adds to the old timey sit come vibe

I like these bells

Ok I know I complained about to much time being wasted with logos and such, but i LOVE how cheesy this theme song is and I love them showing vision and Wanda driving tp there house in wedding attire

“A regular husband and wife” 2 seconds late *vision disappears into a cloud of sparkles*.... 1 minute 8 seconds in and I love this 

Even there acting is reminiscent of an old timey sit com this is amazing

feel like I should note he title sequence ends at the 1.36 mark approximately, which may not seem like a lot but again the show is less than thirty minutes so it adds up

Wanda talks with a fifties accent: I already love this show

Also I wish I had magic I could use to clean, I’m moving back into my dorm right now and Wanda’s powers would be SO helpful

Also I LOVE the laugh track

Also Wanda’s short curly hair is so cute

I love how neither of them knows what the heart means so they play it off by being like “yeah of course I know what it means, how could I forget? Do YOU remember what it means

Also Vision is literally part computer shouldn’t he have a photographic memory? 

Also how old is Wanda? I could have sworn someone said she was 19 in civil war, which would make her like 21 here? I think?? Idk tho, as a 19 year old I don’t think she has ever looked 19 in the movies, even back in Ultron she looked at least in her mid twenties

The face Vision makes when he makes himself human is so funny

Also Vision blowing Wanda a kiss and her reaching back to grab it is the perfect amount of corny that makes it still cute

Also I wonder what vision’s job is

The backing music is so funny

I can already tell Agnes is going to be some great comic relief in a show that’s already hilarious

“I assure you, I’m married. To a man. A HUMAN one!” I know I’ve said before that I was never the biggest fan of Wanda or Vision but I love Wanda in this show

Obv there is something clearly off here, but I feel like I need to mention that it’s clear this is some warped reality. If I had never seen any of the MCU before, I may believe it was just  witch and her robot husband living in the fifties, but the little details really make it clear to the audience (the majority of whom I am sure are familiar with the mcu) that something is off. This scene is one of those, where Wanda cannot seem to recall how long her and Vision have been together and plays it off by saying “It feels like we always have been together”

Is Agnes giving Wanda advice for the bedroom? is this really what I’m watching? Or have I wildly misinterpreted this?

Love the old timey lingo

Vision working a desk job is so funny

Love that vision doesn’t even know what they do at his job, I know it’s part of the false reality thing but also lowkey relatable

“you’re like a walking computer” “I most certainly am not! I’m a regular carbon-based employee made entirely of organic matter”

I started this like twenty minutes ago and have only gotten 7 minutes in because I keep stopping to type my reactions. I am going to try to shut up and watch, and stop screaming about every little detail for a bit 😂

Real quick though does Vision just go by Vision at work?

Ope apparently he does. 

I wonder if Vision took Wanda’s last name

Or is he Vision Stark-Banner since it was Tony and Bruce who made him??

He probably isn’t called that but I think it would be funny if he was

Love that instead of writing “dinner with boss” or “Dinner w/ Harts” or even just “Harts” he drew a freaking heart like im dying

if my lack of emojis seems weird I’m typing this on a computer which I never normally do and I’m to lazy to pull up the emoji keyboard, so basically imagine there’s a cry laughing emoji after everything funny

“No skeletons in the closet?’ “I don’t have a skeleton sir.”

Yup I was right, Agnes is giving her sexy time advice

“you should stumble when you walk in a room so he can catch you. It’s romantic!” that is the only way I will be flirting from now on

Also I got to say, I'm guessing it’s a fifties thing but those pointy bras don’t look comfortable

So she answers the phone “Vision Residence” Is Vision also their last name now? Does he go by Vision Vision??

They make the best facial expressions

This phone conversation where Wanda think they’re having a date night whereas Vision is talking about his boss coming for dinner is comedy GOLD

also I love the fact that they’re giving us stereotypical sitcom drama while keeping it clear that there are bigger problems than dinner with the boss

Fake commercial break is at 9.56 (these time stamps are for myself I want to calculate how much of the episode is actually the story)

I do love the fake commercials tho! And I suppose in a way they ARE part of the show

They missed the chance to make it the toastmate three thousand and make every ironman fan cry

The beeping toaster sounds like a ticking bomb..... also the little red light is the only color we’ve seen this episode I think

Commercial ends at 10.46

Also love that it was an SI toaster, still wish they had made it 3000 instead of 2000

How did Wanda confuse Mr. Hart with her husband? Not that I’m complaining, her coming out in a robe and covering Vis’ Boss’ eyes is HILARIOUS

“This is the traditional Sokovian greeting? Didn’t I tell you my wife is from Europe?” “How exotic!” “We don’t break bread with Bolsheviks”

Visions pants are SO high waisted

“It’s our anniversary!” “Our anniversary of WHAT?” “WELL IF YOU DON”T KNOW I”M NOT GONNA TELL YOU”

Poor Vision is trying to figure out what kind of company he works for this is sooo funny

Agnes coming in clutch with a full meal

So Wanda needs the ingredients in order to magic a meal she can’t just make one appear

Vision breaking into song was amazing

How did one chicken turn into like 30 eggs

Vision is singing old McDonald with his bosses wife this is great

“Diane!” “That must be my wife summoning me!” “She calls you Diane?” “Yes... it’s her pet name for me” “I’m coming... Fred”

So many clichés in this show but it’s done in such a purposeful way that it’s still funny

Also we have only seen three rooms: the kitchen, the living room and Vision’s workplace

“Well I think tonight’s going SWIMMINGLY”

Mrs. Hart is SO NOSY

But I love that they don’t know the answers

Wanda looks SO disturbed when Mr. Hart is demanding her and visions story, you can tell her mind is fighting itself and it’s so sad

Mr. Hart is choking, is it bad that I think he deserves it?

Mrs. Hart keeps cheerily repeating stop it, and gone is the stereotypical sitcom camera angles and and the backing music is switched for something eery

This is lowkey scary, Mr. Hart Dying while his wife keeps cheerily saying Stop It and it just feels creepier the more she repeats

Wanda looks distressed and vision is just looking to her for what to do, her old timey accent is gone and she sounds nearly robotic as she tells Vision to help

Poor Wanda, she is so clearly going through it mentally right now

Laugh track is back, and just like that the Harts are leaving, despite only having one bite of food

And somehow Mr. Hart is impressed? Was Wanda rewriting reality to make them so?

I know that this is clearly some alternate reality and nothing is right, but wanda and vision deciding to choose that day as there anniversary and this little convo here is soooooo cute

Aw her making them rings and them both saying I do is soooo cute

And vision saying “and they lived happily ever after’ is so sweet but also so sad in context

What is that little remote vision is holding meant to be?

And love the hexagon closing in on them with the cute music playing to end the episode

Are the people in these credits real? Because it lists the start as Wanda Maximoff and Vision but are the rest actual people?

So there is some sketchy dude watching the maybe fake credits so there's something going on there

The actual credits start with 7.13 left and I’ve been told there's no mid or post credits scene. I’ll let them play while I finish this up anyways

8 minutes and 49 seconds of this show is the logo, title sequence and credits. Out of 29.36 total this means only 20 minutes and 47 seconds is the show, which I suppose is standard for a sitcom but I think I felt deceived by it showing as 29 minutes

Also 50 seconds of “commercial takes the show time down to 19.57 if anyone was wondering

I swear tho I’m not all that bothered by the length, just did the math in case anyone was curious like I am. 

I thought I was going to really enjoy this going it, but it still really surpassed my expectations and I can’t wait for episode 2!

This is my raw reactions, but I’m sure that as I mull it over more I’ll be posting more about the show

This is somehow a perfect combo of lighthearted comedy and mild horror

I wanna let this episode stew for a while, so I prob won’t watch episode 2 for at least a day

Also what are your guys’ thoughts on this format of reaction? Did I write to much?

Also what did y’all think of this episode? Feel free to let me know what you think of my reaction, and whether you agree or disagree. I’d love to hear your thoughts!

[outoftownagain]

The best restaurants in Santorini, Greece

This, of course, isn't a definite list. We didn't even try a fraction of what the culinary world of Santorini has to offer and I am sure there are plenty of equally fantastic or better places. But by these 5 restaurants stood out for us and came recommended by other travelers and locals.

Hope you're not hungry!

---

1. Μεταξύ Μας / Metaxi Mas 9FQ5+H2 Exo Gonia, Greece www.santorini-metaximas.gr

Metaxi Mas is a must whether you take a taxi, rent a four-wheeler, or simply walk from the charming village of Pyrgos. (We were advised very strongly against doing the latter by a very nice lady at a souvenir store: "It's not possible to walk, it's in the next village! But it is a wonderful restaurant, you must make it there regardless," she said. We did it anyway and it took about half an hour of walking downhill.) And just like pretty much everyone we spoke to about Metaxi Mas promised, it is absolutely amazing. You won't find your regular horiatiki and moussaka here, but by the time you make it here, you've most likely had enough of those and will be excited to take a quick break. You'll also have a change of view, because the cozy terrace is overlooking the airport and the less photographed side of the island, which may be slightly less iconic but gorgeous nonetheless. We started with Smoked Fish in a Chickpea Stew and the moment we tasted the dish, we knew that it would be the best meal on the island. We continued with Shrimp saganaki finished with ouzo, tomato sauce, fennel and feta cheese, which I will remember for a long time. And then, for a finale, a Spicy fried pork with Assyrtiko Santorini wine (which we were about to learn all about at a nearby winery, Santo Wines) with peppers, onion, garlic, Santorini cherry tomatoes, feta cheese and boukovo—red pepper flakes. Were we full? Of course. Did we want more? Absolutely! It was our last day on Santorini, so we knew we wouldn't have time to return to Metaxi Mas, so we asked our lovely waitress if she could suggest just one more, small dish, simply because everything was so delicious that we'd love another bite. She said that her favorite thing on the menu was Oven-baked asparagus with Cretan graviera cheese and estragon, and we thought that a little asparagus appetizer would be a perfect finishing touch to this feast. Little did we know that the "small dish" is in fact a huge plate filled with lots and lots of hot, melty, delicious cheese (with a little bit of asparagus buried deep under). It was way more than we wanted but way too delicious to leave behind and a taxi to take us to the wine tour at Santo Wines was already waiting. We might have burnt our mouths a little but we finished the asparagus and our wonderful waitress brought us a dessert packed to go because she knew we had to go. If you're in Santorini right now and looking for some delicious food, I couldn't be more jealous of you!

---

2. To Psaraki Vlichada Marina, Vlichada 847 00, Greece www.topsaraki.gr

Near the southernmost tip of Santorini, at the end of Perivolos beach you'll find the charming Vlychada port. Arguably the best place to view it from (and definitely the most delicious one) is To Psaraki taverna. You'll have to drive or take a taxi there but the place is worth the trip. The actual restaurant is very nice but you really want to sit at the bright blue terrace across the street, which overlooks the port and the sea. Eating at To Psaraki feels like finding a hidden gem andt also like being on a Greek postcard at the same time.   The food is delicious and it starts from the very beginning—each table receives a bread basket and a portion of Santorini tomato paste with olive oil and oregano. (There is a tomato paste museum down the road, but it was still closed due to Covid when we visited.) We continued the feast with Fresh Greek mussels steamed with wine and spring onions (it's hard to imagine a more perfect dish to go with the view of sea and a distant smell of a seaport) after which a gorgeous Grilled Octopus arrived. Can't say that we were hungry anymore, but our main dish — fresh and homely amberjack was only about to be served. Accompanied by vegetables, tomatoes and a lemon, it was wonderful.

The restaurant overlooks the port and a short walkaway is Vlychada Beach with black sand, a beach bar and some amazing view of the cliffs, which makes it easy to spend a whole day in this small area.

---

3.  Kokkalo 25is Martiou 25, Thira 847 00, Greece kokkalosantorini.com

We arrived in Santorini midday and after the initial shock caused by the overwhelming beauty of the view from the plane, then the taxi and finally from our suite, we were ready to eat. We picked Kokkalo purely because it was the closest recommended restaurant from our suite. It did take some climbing (everything in Santorini involves countless stairs and hills) and then a short walk along a busy, narrow street, but the place was 100% worth it.

We were greeted by a very friendly and quirky lady with a very particular sense of humor and a tray with 2 glasses of strong, local liquor. Day drinking it is! After hearing that we just arrived on the island, she was quick to recommend a local specialty—Santorini tomato fritters. "If you're going to have them, you need to have them here," she said, "we have cooking classes and we teach how to make them here." Tomato fritters are very tasty, but to be completely honest, it is one of those dishes that you try once and don't necessarily need to order again anytime soon.

We also got the Santorini Greek Salad and Chicken Souvlaki, which were both absolutely delicious and anyone could eat them every day for a long time. The presentation of the chicken deserves a special shoutout—it is definitely an attention-grabber when it arrives at the table.

Kokkalo is totally a great spot—it may not overlook the volcano, but staring into the flat side of Santorini with Anafi island in the distance is a pure pleasure! Mix that with great food, chilled wine and lovely service and you have a fantastic experience!

---

4. Roka Mpotsari 6, Oía 847 02, Greece www.roka.gr

I'm not gonna lie, Roka was a bit of an accident (a great one though!) We hiked from Fira to Oia and we completely underestimated the time it would take us to complete the hike considering all the stops for wine, snacks, photos and views. They say that the hike takes from 3 to 6 hours and it did take us 6 hours (we're fast hikers but we stopped A LOT along the way to enjoy the views and wine) so when we finally got to Oia, we needed to eat before the sunset and most places were either booked or still closed because of Covid. We basically ran to check out Roka and it is semi-hidden in a maze of small, charming alleyways so we got a little lost trying to find it. We were greeted by a man who looked like he could be in a movie about a mafia-ran restaurant: white shirt and a tie, a sceptical gaze, a cigarette hanging from the corner of his mouth, and a brutal silence. He turned out to be our waiter and luckily he turned out to be very friendly, much contrary to our first impression of him.

We were seated at the small back patio lit by the setting sun and overlooking the sea and some less touristy parts of town and the island. The food was absolutely delicious yet presented in a slightly pretentious but cheesy way. It is not taverna food and obviously the chef is aspiring to a higher level of a dining experience. To start we were served rusk with olives and delicious tomato paste, which we learned was typical of Santorini, famous for its cherry tomatoes. Then we continued with ‘Imam Bayaldi’ with eggplant, shrimps, ’Oyzo’ glaze and chilli garlic mayo and Mushrooms Ragout on a sourdough bruschetta with caramelized onions, cream and gruyere sauce. Those two appetizers were quite Huge And Totally Satisfied Our Post-Hike Hunger, But We Had Two More Dishes Coming - Main Courses This Time.

Skioufikta - Traditional Greek Handmade Pasta with Caramelized Onion, Eggplant, Zucchini, Tomato and ’Xinoturi’ From Ios, which was light, delicate and delicious. The shape of pasta is a bit like cavatelli and is a perfect vessel for the summer flavors of this dish. Fresh Dorado Fillet came with fantastic Parsnip Puree, Braised Leek that melts in your mouth with Hazelnuts and was topped with long, thin crisps that gave it an additional texture. Satisfied and excited, we ran to the nearby Castle of Agios Nikolaos for a spectacular and unforgettable sunset.

---

5. Naoussa Fira Santorini Next to the Central Orthodox Cathedral of Fira Town Mitropoleos Fira Town, Thira 847 00, Greece naoussasantorini.restaurant

When we arrived at this gigantic taverna, it was empty, with the only two guests eating at a table near the windows. We decided to sit at the other table with a view—right next to the couple finishing their dinner. It turned out to be a quite an unfortunate choice because those guests were an extreme example of a married couple who goes out to talk to other people in bars and restaurants. We spent the entire dinner listening about the wealth, success and amazing life of our co-diners, all the houses, apartments, businesses and countless trips all over the world were described in detail whether we wanted it or not. We also learned the history of their relationship including tidbits like: "Would you believe that after not seeing me for 2 weeks my husband chose to take me out to eat sushi instead of taking me to the bedroom straight from the airport?"

But back to the restaurant, the food was delicious and the sunset view (when we managed to look away from our interlocutors) quite terrific. We started with Dolmades, which are vine leaves stuffed with lemony rice and happen to be one of my favorite small dishes. The leaves are the best when they're delicate and not veiny, the rice needs to be moist and the entire thing is best served room temperature or slightly warm. So good! We also had a tuna salad with hard boiled eggs, which looked a bit like mess but was packed with unexpected flavor. We finished with a whole fish, which was absolutely perfect.

We did drink a lot of wine and we took our time eating, listening to the forced stories and admiring the sunset. At some point the initially empty dining room filled up completely and then it emptied again. It felt like we experienced the whole circle of sunset dining crowd.

[tsurangaconundrum]

honestly i think ive brought the mood down by talking about dead birds. but luckily i have a fun story about live birds! actually this is one that i find kinda strange myself.

im going to assume you know whatabouts the typical county fair looks like. actually you did say you dont have squirrels so mbby ur not american... it basically looks like theres this huge field and a huge barn and a rather decent sized inside bit and a few little wooden structures nearby to make shade. and pretty much all year its super empty, i think part of it becomes a dog park the rest of the time? i dunno. anyway, once a year a carnival will roll in and the ffa and 4-h roll in and the entire place is filled with trailers and tents and rides and, especially with animals. and it goes on for like a week, opens rlly early and closes rlly late. i know we had a rather large fair where i live. its a Big Deal.

now, if youre a regular person youll go to the fair maybe once or twice, look at some of the historical stuff or whatever thats in the building, maybe walk through the barn, go on a few rides visit a few vendors, and go home. if you’re participating in the fair its a whole nother story. ill spare you the details but it involves getting up early grooming a pissy animal that youve been raising all year specifically for this (or training for this, it depends on what you do. i wont be talking about my own experience because i’m pretty sure you’d be able to find out exactly where i live from it and im not too keen on that) getting dressed up (white buttondown shirt, wipe the mud off your boots, and new jeans) and driving down to the fairgrounds to set up in either a tent or a barn.

so i find the tent im supposed to be in and we start setting up. since we were a small group they stuck us in a tent with another small group, a handful of chickens, some fancy, some just regular hens, but all pretty. so anyway we get judged, my animal will only perform AFTER the judging when its not her turn so it didnt count (but she fucking nailed it). and apparently she wasnt a good example of her breed or whatever but idc how much experience this guy has she was damn cute and had straight legs and everything. (im not mad about not winning im mad that he went out of his way to be a dick). (also my sister won and she was also a dick.)

anyway, we start slowing down, its hot as the dickens, so im just trying to keep myself and my animal cool until we can leave. so i look over at the other side of the tent and youll never fucking believe this: these dudes are dressing up their chickens. IT WAS A CHICKEN COSTUME CONTEST. have you ever heard of such a thing???? so of course i stick around for the judging. and admiring these hand sown chicken garments. im talking dresses and little hats and even props, it was a damn beauty pageant. i kept expecting mama june to come through the door with her toddler. ok and this wasnt /just/ a chicken costume contest, oh no, i wasnt clear on if they have a theme every year or if this is just how they do it, but it was a historical chicken costume contest.

there were only a few chickens there. apparently runway training a hen isnt a popular hobby, cant imagine why, but oh boy were they fabulous. its been maybe... i wanna say six years so excuse me if my memory is fuzzy.

most of the chickens were dressed fairly sparsely, draping things, hats, etc. dont get me wrong these were still incredible (ex; chicken abraham lincon. chicken cowboy that i should probably reckognize. chicken union solider.) but compared to this one guy they were party city cuz this guy had sewn an honest to god suffragette costume for his lovely red hen. he blew the competition out of the water even though his hen wasn’t fancy and i think the moral of this story is that it doesnt matter who you are or how good at things you are if youve got great legs and know how to sew youll make it in life. pretty sure mark twain said that. i just- words cannot describe seeing this chicken in her blue dress and her sunhat with the sash and the “voting rights now!” sign. it was magnificent! i havent been able to find the chicken costume contest since and now the only proof that it ever existed is on my moms shitty old camera. i think.

why did the chicken cross the road? for women’s voting rights.

my ask box is now a bird confessional do not send asks unless youre talking about birds thank you very much.