#like basically safe spaces idk

[mrstellmeafuckingsecret]

gay men who think theyre women and try putting themselves into women's spaces pmo actually, ESPECIALLY online spaces

[decisions-at-3am]

Maybe I stopped smiling, When I looked around. Finally realising, No one cared if I did.

[vehemourn]

went to post this on twitter but i didnt wanna get banned . crazy that u can scrape my entire lifes work and i cant even tell u to die over it <3

[not-poignant]

Happy New Year! My question is for Arden in Falling Falling Starz. Does he compartmentalise when he practices Judo? I’ve never done Judo but I’ve done Jiujitsu and there is a lot of touching in that sport that I would think falls into his hard limit touching.

There is a ton of grappling in judo!

But it doesn't trigger Arden. First, he's very competent at it, so he's actually confident he can throw just about anyone that comes at him, and when he's putting himself in positions to be thrown it's specifically with newbies / people he's educating so he can control the situation.

Second, he started learning before he was molested/assaulted, so his associations with the dojo, and that kind of touch/pressure/movement, were already firmly in place as something safe and fun.

Third, it's non-sexual!

Fourth, triggers aren't logical. This one should probably have gone first, because it's the most important one. Triggers aren't logical. As an example, I have a C-PTSD and PTSD from a lot of different things, and as an example of a hit-and-miss trigger around surgical trauma, I can't watch any reality TV about medical stuff or surgeries but I can watch medical dramas if they're fictional and handle people talking about medical stuff they've gone through. I don't know why reality TV is the hard line, and I don't need to, and no one else needs to, that's where the trigger manifests (that and in real hospitals). You'd assume, using your logic, that because there's a lot of exposure to medical stuff and graphic surgical depiction in fictional TV on the subject, or in friends talking about it in detail, I'd find it equally as triggery but I don't not only find it less triggery, I don't find it triggery at all. That part of my brain simply doesn't wake up, and has zoned it into the safe zone.

Triggers don't have to be consistent - in fact it's more realistic if they're not.

Judo is a non-sexual sport that was brought into Arden's life before he was hurt by his brother, where Arden is very competent and knows what he's doing. Despite the proximity and physical closeness, judo helped Arden to feel safe and protected, especially in the chaotic aftermath of what happened to him. And also: triggers do not give the smallest shit about being consistent and/or logical. Like, sometimes, they do! And sometimes it's just...they do not care.

[neonnoir-ao3]

…would you guys think of me as cringey if I started talking about romancing, fucking, and/or general content regarding the Allied Mastercomputer from I Have No Mouth And I Must Scream? pls be honest

[datapilled]

I won't lie - ever since I became physically ill/disabled, I've become more worried about people trying to tell me that I'm lying about my own conditions and experiences. It doesn't help that people have told me that they think I'm exaggerating for attention to my face (and behind my back) even before the physical disability was diagnosed. People want disabilities to be simple and straightforward, and want to always view doctors and nurses as angels.

[wontbyers]

Mood: I feel like indulging in Mileven in a way that I think neither Bylers nor Milevens will understand/appreciate.

(I'm so past the point of having any doubt about Byler being endgame that I feel safe to enjoy some Mileven content in a non-canon ship way, since I've always been a multi-shipper at heart. Their past relationship had its moments and I wanna appreciate what they meant to each other even if they don't end up together.)

[confessiononadancefloor]

rant <3

[cinnamorollcrybaby]

Can’t live without your love inside me now

Tags: sextherapist!Nanami x fem!reader, nocurse!au, taboo romance, heavy topics such as sexual assault, dead dove due to the power imbalance and heavy conversation, is this considered angst? idk

Synopsis: In which Kento Nanami is a sex therapist, and his client is a young neglected wife with an emotionally absent husband. He teaches you what love is really all about.

An: Just another warning that this fic deals with heavy themes. It’s honestly been so therapeutic for me to write due to my own history. If it’s not for you, I have plenty of other Nanami fics that are more lighthearted. For the anons in my requests asking for more Nanami, this is for you.

Part one. | Part two.

“With those things in mind, I’m interested in what has brought you into my office today.”

“I’m not sure… Sex just doesn’t appeal to me much anymore.”

Being a sex therapist, Kento Nanami has heard it all. He’s seen this same presenting problem again and again. He’s counseled young and older men with erectile dysfunction. He’s counseled persons of the LGBTQ+ community come to terms with their sexuality and how that relates to sex. He’s counseled so many people who come from purity culture and struggle with sex. He’s counseled couples who can’t seem to get it right in the bedroom. He’s counseled sexual assault survivors.

Kento Nanami prides himself on upholding the ethics of counseling. He keeps the code of ethics proudly sat upon his shelf. His goal as a therapist was to give everyone a safe space to divulge their most vulnerable inner thoughts to him.

Sex was too often treated as a taboo, offensive subject, which is why Nanami got into sex therapy in the first place. He wanted to change the stigma around it. Sex was a basic need for the majority of individuals, and many times, people have poor experiences with sex since it’s not normalized and hardly talked about.

“Okay, so is it fair to say you don’t often feel like you’re in the mood for sex?” he asked as he looked towards his client. A pretty young lady sat across from him on his couch. His “office” was in his home, finding that people often didn’t want to talk about sex in what they considered to be a “public” space like a therapist’s office.

“Yeah, I mean… I just...” your voice trailed off. You already felt like this might be a mistake. Your arms crossed over your chest as it felt like you were naked in front of your incredibly handsome counselor.

His office was nice, serene almost. He had different seating options and all kinds of fidget items around his office. He also had a plethora of books on a shelf behind his desk.

It seems he enjoys spending his time reading up about the art of sex. You can’t help but feel your face warm from thinking about him reading those sorts of things in his free time.

The walls were painted a nice soft blue grey color, and the office smelled like fresh linen from the aroma diffuser in the corner of the room. Several different houseplants were also scattered about. They all looked healthy, assuring you that Nanami paid attention to detail. He was responsible and consistent.

“Take your time,” Nanami assured you as he sat back in his chair. “The first visit is always the hardest. Don’t feel pressured to get down to the bottom of why you’re lacking a sexual drive. These things take time and trial and error.”

That was… almost reassuring. You took a deep breath as your fingers absentmindedly twirled a strand of hair behind your ear. The familiar ministration worked to calm your mind.

“I’m young, and I’m recently married. I have no kids. I feel like I should be… I don’t know— at my sexual prime or something.”

“What gave you that idea?” Nanami probed as he continued observing your small nervous habits. He found his lips trying to curl into a smile, but he kept his face meticulously trained as a look of interest.

“Well, girls talk, you know? My girlfriends talk about their lack of a sex life stemming from other obligations or from a lack of a connection…” you explained as you briefly looked up at Nanami. Each time his hazel eyes met yours, you had to look away immediately.

When you found his information online, you didn’t think he’d be this handsome. You just saw all of his credentials, and you had heard good things about him on different websites centered around “rating” therapists.

Of course, you had done some digging on him. There was no way in hell you were going to go to some strange man’s house to talk about sex. That sounded ridiculous.

“Do you compare yourself to these so called ‘girlfriends’ often?” Nanami asked calmly. His voice was even and smooth, allowing you feel even more safe to open up.

“I mean, no. They’re just all I have in terms of what’s normal for sex.”

“Okay, so let me make sure I understand this right. You lack a sexual drive. You feel guilty that you lack sexual drive because you believe you don’t have a good enough reason to not want sex on a regular basis, and you think that you’re not normal. Does that cover it?”

You winced a bit as it was all laid out on the table for you. Your eyes squeezed shut, trying to hide from how pathetic you sounded. You sheepishly nod in response.

“Y/n, open your eyes for me,” his voice spoke gently, coaxing you to slowly flutter your eyes open to look into his. Once he had your gaze, he went on, “These are all normal feelings to have. I can blab on and on to you about how our society is blatantly misogynistic when it comes to sex, but I’ll spare you the details since I’m sure you’re painfully aware. We’re going to figure this out together, alright?”

You took a deep breath, letting his words wash over you as a security blanket. It was nice to have someone to just talk about these things freely to. You felt a glimmer of hope shine through.

“Okay,” you said with a small nod, feeling more confident now.

“So, you mentioned earlier that you're recently married. Tell me a little bit about that."

You try not to have a physical reaction when Nanami brings up your husband. It was a topic that felt too raw.. too close to home. You’re supposed to be a dutiful wife, right? So, why would you feel that way when talking about your husband?

“Oh, uh… well,” you stammer, looking away from Nanami as you suddenly came up blank on your own marriage. “We got married about a year ago. Some say we’re still in the honeymoon phase, but…”

Nanami perks up a little in his chair. Some therapists take notes or record their sessions. Nanami doesn’t believe in it. He thinks it takes away from the moment. He’d much rather be present with his client rather than jotting down notes.

“But..?” he urges you to go on.

“But… I guess it just doesn’t feel that way.”

“What is your idea of the honeymoon phase? What does that look like to you?” Nanami asks, clasping his hands together in his lap as he relaxes into his chair.

You take a moment to process his question. What does the honeymoon phase look like?

“For me, it looks like the movies where couples do things for each other without being asked. They’re attuned to each other’s emotions, and they make a conscious effort to be sensitive to their partner’s feelings.” Your eyes meet Nanami’s once again, and you let out a deep breath. No one told you that counseling would be this mentally strenuous.

“Okay, what about in your current life? Do you feel like that’s how it is now?”

You nearly laugh from the question. You mentioned that sort of love being in movies because you’ve never seen it in real life. You’re nearly convinced that it doesn’t happen in real life, and anyone who claims to have that type of love must be lying.

“No, I feel like we’re both focused on our own lives… We just happen to also be in a marriage together.”

“That doesn’t seem like an active partnership,” Nanami responds as he searches your face thoughtfully. He can feel his heart ache for you. This is by far his least favorite presenting problem to work with because he can’t just tell you that you need to leave your husband. All he can do is inspire you to seek the changes you need. “What are you focused on in your own life right now, y/n?”

You feel the tension set in your shoulders and neck as soon as you hear that question. Just thinking about what all you have to do is enough to stress you out. “For starters, I work full-time. It’s a standard corporate job from eight to five, but it can be a lot.”

“That’s not easy, y/n. Just because that is what’s considered to be standard, doesn’t mean it’s easy. I’m sure that’s a lot on your plate.” His voice was low and calm. His presence felt so warm in the room; you feel like you’re finally able to open up a little.

“Yeah, I guess you’re right. I also take care of the house and our pets.”

“The housework… is that all your responsibility?” Nanami asks as his eyebrows knit together slightly. He feels like he’s already scratching the surface of why you don’t have any sex drive.

“Yeah. If I want him to do anything, I have to delegate the work to him. My husband always says to just tell him whenever I want something done, and I should be grateful that he’s willing to help—“

Nanami couldn’t help himself. He doesn’t like to interrupt clients often, but the more you talk about tour husband, the more he’s having to hold himself back. “That’s the bare minimum.”

You’re slightly taken aback, and you look away from Nanami. A part of you knows that he’s right, but… you didn’t want to bad mouth your husband. A large boulder of guilt settled into your stomach.

“Tell me what you’re feeling right now,” Nanami’s voice returns to that gentle tone. “That probably wasn’t appropriate for me to say. I apologize.” He knows he shouldn’t have said that, and he knows he has to appropriately handle this if he wants you to feel comfortable enough to open up again.

“I guess I just… It feels wrong talking negative about my husband to another man. It just feels different when I’m ranting with my girl friends.” You straighten your posture and take a deep breath. It feels good getting that out in the open.

Nanami slowly nods his head. He can see why you view that act as troublesome. “So, you’re feeling tense because of our opposing sexes? Tell me. Does your husband know where you are right now?”

“Well, yeah… He was honestly the one who told me I needed help since I don’t feel any sort of sex drive.”

Nanami’s teeth subtly clench together, but he keeps a stoic expression as best as he can. The thought of your husband claiming that there’s something wrong with you absolutely repulses Nanami.

“How does that make you feel?”

Your fingers twitch a bit as you look down to the ground. You should be honest with Nanami if you really want the help that you came here for.

“I guess it makes me feel like I’m not good enough for him. Every time we have sex I try to cater to him, but it just feels like it’s never enough. If he had it his way, we’d probably have sex everyday, but I just don’t have that kind of time, energy, or desire.”

Nanami feels his chest tighten while he listens to you. This is why he hated working with this presenting problem. This man is ruining your confidence and self-esteem, and your low sex drive is either completely natural or it’s because of him.

If Nanami could show you what it was like to be truly loved, he would. Then, you’d probably open your eyes and see that your husband is the one who isn’t good enough for you.

He shakes those thoughts out of his head. He knows he’s bound to a code of ethics. He can’t pursue you romantically or sexually. It’d be morally wrong.

“That’s heavy.” He nods, allowing silence for reflection. He then speaks up again after a pregnant pause, “Let’s break down what you said sentence by sentence, okay? First, you have said that you feel guilty and not good enough in terms of sex.”

You slowly nod, still avoiding eye contact with Nanami. Why didn’t anyone tell you that this would be so emotionally exhausting.

“Do you put a lot of pressure on yourself to perform?”

That question alone opened up the floodgates. Tears bit into your eyes, and you covered your face with your hands. “All the time,” your voice cracked, betraying how deep this affected you.

“Oh dear,” Nanami says softly. He grabs a box of tissues, and he hands them to you. “Sex is meant to feel natural and progressive. It’s understandable that you don’t feel any drive if you’re constantly pressuring yourself.”

You nod as you take the tissues, dabbing your eyes gently.

“I just,” you let out a deep shaky breath, trying to calm your nervous system. “It’s easier to just do it and get it over with rather than to hear him ask multiple times.”

Nanami clenches his jaw. His hand gently finds your shoulder, and he makes you look up at him. “Listen to me. If you take nothing else away from this entire session, take this. Asking multiple times even though the answer was clearly a no is coercion. Whenever he asks multiple times, he’s hoping that you get tired of telling him no and just give in.”

Your eyes meet Nanami’s, and your eyebrows furrow a little. Coercion? No.. no, that can’t be right. He’s your husband. He’s just asking to make sure you hadn’t changed your mind. He wouldn’t coerce you into anything you didn’t want to do…

You slightly pull away from Nanami. “I don’t think that’s right… He wouldn’t do something like that. He’s not abusive.”

Nanami leans back. He chides himself internally for going in too deep too quickly. He’s grateful that you’re giving him grace right now. You definitely could’ve just left the session after he blatantly told you that your husband was a conniving piece of shit.

He takes a deep breath. “I apologize. I must have it wrong,” he says as he regains his posture. He knows he needs to make you understand. “Would you like a cup of tea?”

“Oh—? Uh, no.. no I’m okay, thanks.”

“Are you sure? It’s good tea.” Nanami leans in slightly, not breaking eye contact with you.

“Yeah, I’m sure… I don’t really think I can stomach it..” you respond, confused as to why he was suddenly wanting to make you tea.

“Tea is good for digestion. It might help your stomach. You really don’t want any? I can make it quickly with an electric kettle I bought the other day.”

You slouch back a little, a frown covering your lips. “I mean.. I guess tea would be okay.”

Nanami then gives you a knowing look, and the realization hits you. “Did you actually want the tea, or were you just going to accept the tea because I kept pestering you?”

Goddammit. This therapist is good.

Taglist: @theuniversesnepobaby @airandyeah

[gloomwitchwrites]

okay okay so boys coming home off a deployment that was long ASF and they just want a hot shower, hot meal (maybe a cuppa) and some cuddles from their wifey and their wee baby. they come through the door weary and tired and oh! it’s right after bath time and baby’s all wrapped up in a fluffy animal bath towel. maybe it’s a little oversized on them (even though we KNOW these men produce 99th percentile babes) idk i just know their hearts would warm at the sight

okay. okay okay okay. Anon, you're giving me brain worms. You're making my ovaries tingle and my desire to reproduce rage so bad I want to chew on something (so like, how dare you??)

It's entirely possible that you sent this in for the imagines series (and I'll totally add it to the masterlist just in case), but I just need to ramble about this. I need to TALK about this.

Also, do y'all know that my inbox isn't just for requests? Because I'm a yapper when it comes to the written word. I do not know how to shut up.

Dad!141 ahead

(mdni for brief suggestive themes)

John Price is coming home and going full in on those snuggles. He wants wifey in one arm and baby in the other. He'll take those snuggles on the sofa, the bed, or the floor. Doesn't matter. All he wants is to be close to his family. After snuggling, that man is putting baby to bed on his own. In fact, Price insists that he does. It's a treat for him, especially since he's been gone and hasn't had the opportunity. He's missed being a father. And the hot shower? Wifey is taking that shower with him. The man is so handsy, it's likely he's making baby number two right then and there.

Simon "Ghost" Riley is kissing wifey first the moment he walks through the door. That's the love of his life. That's the mother of his child(ren). That's his best friend. Then, it's baby. The balaclava comes off once Simon comes home. It's his safe space. While he's eager to be alone with his woman, spending some quality time with his spouse and baby is more important. He's making that cuppa and settling for a brief snuggle on the sofa with the both of them. He wants to hold his wife, talk with her, enjoy his cuppa, and play with his kiddo before it's their bedtime. Afterwards? Full intimacy with wifey. In the shower? Check. While getting ready for bed? Check. In bed and most of the night? Check and check.

Kyle "Gaz" Garrick is going to come home and admire his wife and baby for a bit. They aren't going to know he's standing there. Wifey is rocking baby in the nursery, and Kyle is just there in the doorway, happy to be home, to return to the daily humdrum of life. He's not going to realize just how much he missed them until that very moment. This man is the definition of healthy masculinity. He's not afraid to show emotion when he goes in for that first embrace. He completely softens with his family. Endless patience. Endless love. This man loves being a husband and father.

John "Soap" MacTavish is going in for a bear hug. He's wrapping them both up in his arms at the same time. Wifey gets kisses. Baby gets kisses. Soap is absolutely snuggling with baby for a bit, pretending to chew on toes and fingers, basically trying to get every adorable giggle he can out of his child before they go down for bed. Does this rile baby up a bit and make it a little difficult to calm them down for bedtime? Sure, but it's totally worth it for him. Afterwards, his one focus is on his wife.

CoD Headcanons / AUs / Quick Writes Masterlist

[t4t4t]

Hi, remaking bc long/no donations in 5 days

I'm still recovering from bottom surgery I got on July 25th, but I feel better and better every day. I've tried applying for jobs a bunch but still no luck so far. (The 500 deposit may be only required if I / we get better income. Idk. It's rental by owner. They may understand prioritizing surgery needs around the date of her surgery, as well.)

Collie is getting bottom surgery herself on November 13th, less than a month away. She needs to know she has a space she can recover safely.

I basically was only able to pay off the PO box so far, we only have 50 left rn after gas and such over the past 16 days.

We've been working towards these surgeries since 2019, and we've been on and off homeless like 75% of the time since 2020, trying not to be, failing somehow, and coping with waiting. Please help, anything helps. <3

0/829+500

https://venmo.com/u/Leah-Esther-Rose

https://www.paypal.me/androgynophore

https://venmo.com/u/nora-esther-rose

https://www.paypal.me/NoraEstherRose

[nativegirltapes]

boyfriend headcanons . . . . featuring drew starkey !

notes: hcs for boyfie >.< i'll probably do a part 2 bc there's so much you can cover doing boyfriend hcs lol. not proofread bc i am lazy. these are all kinda random idk.

sfw

sweetest boyfriend ever! he’s genuinely just too kind for his own good. he pays attention to the little things, listens to you, spoils you rotten, is constantly complimenting you, and never lets his love for you go unheard. you didn’t think it was possible for boyfriend like drew to exist until you met him.

whenever asked about you in interviews he gets all smiley and flustered. doesn’t matter if you’ve been together for a year or for 17 years, he’s still cheesing and talking about you like you’re the only woman to ever exist.

he loves staying in and reading books. i can see him helping you broaden your horizons when it comes to reading. he’ll buy you both a copy of a book he’s been itching to read and he’ll let you read it at your own pace but he’s constantly asking questions about how far you are in it and what you think.

drew is soooo secretly clingy. everyone knows he loves physical touch and being around his loved ones, but they don’t realize how ‘bad’ it really is. he’s literally a big baby in a 6’4 beefy mans body. when you’re getting up in the morning he’s the type to say “no, don’t leave yet. just a few more minutes.” and yank you back into bed and kiss every crevice of your body. or he’ll always want his arms around your waist, he just loves holding you and making you feel safe because you make him feel safe too.

drew has no problem taking on the more "womanly roles", he loves cooking, cleaning and doing really any household chores for you. he's such a good cook, sometimes you'll come home to the best pasta of your life. he loves making sure you're fed asf and healthy!

he's so supportive of literally everything you do! he'll always hear you out on everything, even things you think are "stupid" or "not good ideas". if you want to pursue something, he's always the first person backing you up.

nsfw

he can man handle you like it's nothing. whenever you're teasing him he'll just pick you up and take you to his room and throw you on the bed, and you're just giggling the whole way there.

size kink. more for you than him...... but you love how big he is compared to you. his big arms, big back, big hands, his height. just standing next to him having him basically hovering over you is enough to get you going.

drew is soooo sweet in bed, he really takes his time with you. foreplay is huge for the both of you; kissing, heavy petting, dry humping. he's so playful and just wants the experienced to be fun and feel good for the both of you. obviously drew loves sex, but I don't think he sees it as something he necessarily needs, but moreso is just happy he gets to experience, especially with you. if that makes sense, he's just happy he gets to be with someone who makes him feel good and thinks he's sexy. and obviously vice verse, he's happy he gets to make you feel good and thinks you're the sexiest woman alive.

he loves to experiment. if you're ever down to try something new, so is he! he makes your relationship such a comfortable space to share and talk about new things you want to try.

[hoshifighting]

hellooo I just want to say that I like your blog, I really like your writing style🫶🏻🫶🏻 AND

what do you think about Vernon finding the reader's twitter spam account? at first, without saying anything, he follows her from a fake account and learns her fetishes and things like that. then he can't hold back and teasing the reader because of this situation and does all the things she reposts, all she wants and imagines(I honestly can't decide whether they will be friends or lovers and I leave it to you)

thank you very much in advance🩷🩷🩷🩷

when vernon finds out about your freaky tweets

WARNINGS: smut, face slapping, BIG DICK!VERNON, cock riding, mentions of hair pulling, dirty talk, choking.

it starts innocently enough; you’ve got your little spam account, this place where you post anything that comes to mind without a second thought. it’s private, anonymous—you’re safe, or so you think. until one day, you start noticing a new follower, someone with zero posts and a random handle, lurking in the notifications. you brush it off, figuring it’s just some bot. but vernon… well, vernon's been piecing things together. and one night, after reading one of your latest posts—something so NASTY that practically burned his screen—he decides he can't just pretend he hasn’t seen it. so he waits until you’re in the living room next saturday, all comfortable, maybe a little too comfortable. you look up, seeing him standing there with that little frown he gets when he's too stressed to understand something, a raised eyebrow, and his phone in his hand.

“so… ‘i just want him to hold me down and—’” he reads aloud, and you feel everything in you freeze up as he raises an eyebrow at you. “‘then pull my hair back so i can see his face… maybe, idk, slap me around a little?’ really, y/n?”

you scramble, trying to play it cool “vernon—wait, why—where’d you see that?”

“oh, i dunno. i’ve been following this account for a while. figured i’d wait until you posted something really crazy before bringing it up.”

you stammer, face going hot. “i—you didn’t have to read it out loud like that, jesus.”

“oh, come on,” he says, leaning in, crowding your space just enough to make you feel cornered “you can post it, but i can’t say it?”

you swallow hard “i didn’t… i didn’t think you’d see it.”

“didn’t think i’d find out?” he echoes, voice dropping a little. “you know, all this time, i’ve been seeing these little things you like. i didn’t say anything because i thought you’d be embarrassed. but now…” he smirks, leaning back with a sigh, watching you. “now i think maybe i should give you some of what you’re so clearly craving.”

“vernon,” you say, trying to keep your voice steady, but it’s hard when he’s looking at you like he’s imagining every filthy thing you’ve ever posted.

he smirks, reaching out to tuck a strand of hair behind your ear. “oh, don’t go all shy on me now. i’ve read what you want. all of it. let’s start with the basics, huh?” his hand trails down, tipping your chin up, thumb brushing over your bottom lip. “you wanna ride me? why didn’t you just say so?”

you feel your heart pounding as he pulls you closer, he's practically purring as he goes, “or that other thing you posted—what was it? something about choking you?” he wraps his hand lightly around your throat, thumb brushing over the sensitive skin as he watches your reaction. “like this?”

you almost cant nod, you're melting, your breath coming short as he tightens his grip just enough to make you feel it “so pretty when you’re horny,” he murmurs, fingers pressing just a little more.

and when you shake your head, he grins, pulling you onto his lap, guiding you to straddle him as his hands settle on your hips “guess i’ve gotta make up for all those little fantasies you’ve been hiding, huh?”

“you sure you can handle it?” he whispers, leaning in, lips brushing against your neck. “’cause i don’t think you really knew what you were asking for when you posted all that.”

but you nod, he tilts your head up, lips brushing over yours, and you feel his hand come up, palm grazing over your cheek before he slaps you—just a little, just enough to make you gasp. he chuckles when you moan, liquefying on his lap, fingers tilting your face back to him.

[...]

he’s already watching you with a azy smirk, eyes rolling sliighty as you sink down onto him, your thighs trembling as you struggle to take all of him in. and god, he’s big. you knew he would be—you’d guessed it a dozen times in all those reckless tweets, wondering just how good it’d feel, but feeling it now, it’s like all that teasing turned on you, stretching you almost too much, and every inch you take feels like a challenge.

“aww, look at you,” he coos, his hands resting on your hips, fingers rubbing little circles into your skin as you try to ease down, taking him deeper, even though it’s making your breath catch, making you whimper and shake. “what happened, baby? i thought you said you could handle it.”

you bite your lip, cheeks burning, and he chuckles, leaning in closer, voice low and teasing. “or maybe you just wanted me to be big so you could talk all that shit on your little account,” he murmurs, running his thumb over your lip. “all those tweets you made, talking about wanting me to be, what—eight, nine inches?” he grins, watching the way you flush, the way your hands grip his shoulders to steady yourself. “think you got what you wished for, hm?”

“shut up,” you manage to whisper, but it’s so breathless, your body clenching around him, and he laughs, hands guiding you down just a bit further, his hips lifting just a little to meet you, that makes you gasp, makes you try to pull back, but he keeps you there, fingers firm on your hips.

“no, no, let’s see you take it,” he whispers, voice rough with that soft teasing. “come on, baby. don’t tell me this is too much. you wanted all of it, right?”

you nod, trying to adjust, but it’s almost too much fr, too thick, too deep, and he watches you with those hooded eyes, savoring every single whimper you make. “it’s okay,” he says softly, almost soothing as he leans up to kiss you, but you can hear that cocky lilt in his tone. “you’re doing so good. even if you can’t take all of it… god, you’re trying, huh?”

and he’s right there, brushing his lips over your cheek, murmuring sweet, filthy encouragements into your ear as you sink down a little more, taking just a bit more of him, even though your body’s practically begging for a break. “that’s it… there you go. so good, baby. i’m impressed,” he purrs, hands trailing up your back. “i didn’t think you’d take even this much.”

every time you pause, every time your breath catches, he’s right there, fingers digging into your hips, guiding you, helping you ride him “guess you really wanted to know..” he murmurs, grinning as he watches you struggle, your head falling back as you finally take just a little more, his hands pulling you down hard against him until you can feel every inch of him.

“there it is… that’s my girl,” he whispers, in asatisfied rasp, his eyes dark as he watches you ride him, just as you’d dreamed about, exactly as you’d hoped—only now it’s even better.

[totheblood]

cutty love.

pairing: ellie williams x reader

summary: ellie becomes your best friend and you stumble upon her journal

warnings: this is purely fluff, cursing, suggestive themes maybe once? idk very soft

a/n: this is because i want bff ellie and also domestic ellie and also wanted to put eleven labs to the test with their new features so please... enjoy! AI AUDIOS SPREAD THROUGHOUT THE FIC also reblogs, asks, and replies are so appreciated and encouraged! thank u kisses

wc: 2.2k

"all my dreams my dear they are of you."

spring came fast to jackson.

dew painted the grass on early mornings and little patches of snow began to melt into the soil. winter was finally over and you were finally back on farming duty. however, you weren’t as excited as you thought you would be.

patrol was something you would have dreaded a year ago, the idea of entering the outside world terrifying you completely. but as winter came around, and farming became obsolete, maria had warned you you needed to sign up for a new task. your dumbass, however, signed up too late and both stable and kitchen work were all filled up. patrol became your only option. 

on your first day of patrol, you were assigned with dina. she basically held your hand through it: walking into buildings first, showing you how to aim and shoot your gun, and teaching you all the best places to hide. it was an easy day with one encounter with an infected (who dina shot on sight).

your second day you were paired with jesse, who was, to your surprise, gentler. he made jokes when he could tell you were getting scared, always walked with his hand outstretched in front of you when walking into new territory, and taught you how to make a molotov cocktail.  you felt safe with them.

on your third day, you were paired with ellie who was less than kind at first. upon seeing you she rolled her eyes and scoffed, mumbling something like, “why do i always have to be paired with the newbies?” 

to avoid confrontation you simply kept your mouth shut. you were supposed to be partners and you were going to do your best to keep yourself alive. like the others, ellie walked into spaces first and after clearing the area for any infected, started a small fire in the lookout to keep the two of you warm.

you stood at a distance from her where she was placing her palms just above the fire and then rubbing them together for warmth. you watched on with a shiver, shaking as you looked out the window.

“you’re not going to get warm from all the way over there,” ellie spoke up, causing you to snap your head in her direction.

“what?”

“the fire is over here. you have to stand close to get at least a little warm,” she commented, beckoning you over with the wave of her hand, “here, come get warm.”

“oh,” you stepped closer to the fire, sitting down across from her, bathing in the warmth the fire offered.

“you’re not really talkative, huh?” ellie chuckled, taking picking at her nails as she spoke.

“uh, no, i usually am,” you laughed nervously, looking to the raised skin around her nailbeds.

“oh, so you just don’t like me?” her tone was joking, but there seemed to be an ounce of vulnerability to it. her eyes looked up to yours, scanning your face for a reaction.

“no, i just,” you took a deep breath and shrugged, “earlier you said you didn’t want to be stuck with the newbie so i didn’t want to be a bother or anything.”

“shit,” she breathed, pinching the bridge of her nose. all of the skin around her nails were raw and red, “i’m such an asshole. i didn’t mean it like that. i’ve just had a shitty week.”

“no, it’s fine,” you forced a smile, “i understand. i’m just nervous and this is all new to me.”

she paused for a moment, looking you over and taking another deep sigh. 

“i’m not usually an asshole.”

“sure.”

“no, seriously, i’m usually nice.”

“i believe you.”

“ok, i’m kind of nice, but i’m doing my best.”

“it’s fine, i’m also an asshole,” you spit out and she laughed. a full chested laugh that went on for what felt like a minute. it was the kind of laugh were all of her teeth showed and wrinkles formed by her eyes. it made your chest feel warm. 

from that moment on you and ellie became close friends. if you knew you were patrolling with her you would bring her a corn muffin wrapped in fabric. she’d say something about how good of a cook you were or mumble a ‘fuck yeah’ before stuffing half the muffin in her mouth. if she killed any infected later she would say something like, “that was only for the muffin. you’re gonna need to bring me another before i do any more of your dirty work.”

occasionally, she would bring her guitar and show you some of the music she was writing in any downtime you had. she was always so excited too, saying something along the lines of: “let’s try to clear this area as fast as we can so i can show you my new stuff.”

when you sat in front of her, legs crossed in front of you, you watched as a bright blush spread across her face before she sang. 

“this is new, so take it easy on me, okay?”

at some point towards the end of december she came to your house with something wrapped in fabric. her whole face was red, but you couldn’t tell if it was from the snow or her nervousness as she shoved the present into your hand.

“what’s this?” you asked, eyes wide ushering her in from the snow and shutting the door behind you.

“it’s a christmas gift,” she smiled, “i don’t know if you know what christmas is but people used to celebrate it back in the old days. joel told me about it and now we celebrate it every year. it’s basically just a holiday where you give your loved ones… or friends a present. they used to pretend this big fat guy with a beard came down people's chimneys and gave presents to kids who were good but i guess they gave up that idea. santa probably got infected or some shit. anyways, this is for you.”

when you peeled back the fabric, a picture of you sketched out on charcoal was on a piece of thick paper. you looked beautiful. it almost looked as if ellie had spent hours looking at your face and studying all the tiny details of it. not to your knowledge, but she had. 

a gasp fell from your lips as tears welled up in your eyes. you didn’t even have time to thank ellie before you were squeezing her tightly in your arms, causing her to cough. you were literally hugging her so tight she couldn’t breathe, but she didn’t mind it. she took a deep breath and hugged you back, smelling the pine on your hair and skin. 

“i love it, ellie,” you whispered, “thank you.”

when january came around, ellie decided you didn’t know how to hold a gun. most of your shots were misses and the drawback made you stumble back. you were becoming a liability, but mostly ellie feared for your safety. all it took was one fall and you would never be the same again.

so here ellie stood giving verbal directions on how to hold a gun. you, however, were a mess who didn’t know your left from your right.

“your left foot! i said your left foot!”

“this is my left foot!”

“babe, that’s your right.”

“oh,” you switched legs but it wasn’t good enough. ellie came up behind you, placing her hands on your shoulder and fixing your posture. the heat from where her hands were on you radatied throughout your body and went straight down your legs. she stepped closer, placing a hand on your stomach and pressing it lightly. your breath hitched. 

“okay, now move your hand like this,” her free hand moved from the base of your arm to your fingertips. she adjusted your stance slowly. slow enough for it to feel like foreplay, “just like that. yeah, good girl.”

you could feel her breath on your neck where your scarf didn’t cover. it was all too sensual and then SNAP. a sound in the distance made her jump back and step in front of you, her own gun drawn in a matter of seconds.

your gun stance was never revisited after that. 

but now it was spring, and you would no longer be on patrol. as much as you liked spending time with ellie, it was still too much of a risk for you to take when you enjoyed farming so much. when you told ellie a big pout broke out on her face as she dramatically reached for you. 

“what am i going to do without you on patrol?” she whined, squeezing you so hard it made you laugh.

“we can still hang out,” you reminded her, pushing her off you, ��plus maybe i’ll be back on patrol next winter.”

“yeah, but i liked having 8 hours of us time. now we will get like 4 hours a day max,” ellie leaned her head back on her couch, the dramatic pout still there. 

“how about we meet here every day after our shifts and have dinner together?” you offered, making her face light up, “i can cook and everything.”

“okay, but you have to sleep over at least once a week,” she demanded

“deal,” you smiled, teeth showing.

“if i’m not here though you can just let yourself in,” she casually commented, “i’ll give you a spare key.”

it went on like that for weeks, you coming over after your shift and making dinner and laughing with ellie about something joel or dina said until you eventually fell asleep on her couch. some nights you would watch a movie together, others you would bake something together (even though ellie usually tapped out when it came to cracking an egg). if ellie was running late or something you would make up time by cleaning up your mess from the kitchen or tidying up the living room, but by that time she would be stumbling through the door and apologizing for being late. 

this night, however, ellie was running extremely late. you had already cleaned both the kitchen and living room and there was still no sight of her. to avoid anxiously pacing around the room and waiting for her, you decided to clean her room. you swept the floors, wiped down her bedside table, and began making her bed before you noticed a notebook tucked in between her bed and it’s frame. 

you pulled it out of its place and examined it. it looked like it was frequently used, the edges of it torn and dirty. the yellow pages of the notebook were slightly hanging out and it looked like pages had been ripped out and stuffed back in. you shouldn’t read this, your mind rang clear. you wanted to respect ellie’s privacy, but curiosity got the best of you. 

you flipped to a middle page, skimming over some entry about how much joel was being an asshole before stopping at your name. your name in her notebook with hearts drawn around it. your name written in pink over and over again. below the different variations of your name was a paragraph, presumably about you. you read it in ellie’s voice.

“another successful patrol. and by successful i mean i tricked her into holding my hand. i probably sound like such a creep but all i want is to be close to her. i want to hold her hand as we walk down the streets of jackson and kiss her in a booth at the diner. when she got scared she would squeeze my hand a little. it made me dizzy. this crush feels like it’s going to ruin me. i think she may ruin me but i don’t even care. all i want is her.”

you smiled, flipping a page, heat rushing to your cheeks as you read another passage about you:

“i sang a song for her today that i wrote about her. she told me my voice was beautiful and asked who it was about. i panicked and told her it was about cat. fucking cat!!! i haven’t thought about cat in fucking forever. i just want to tell her already because this is so fucking embarrassing. she probably thinks i don’t like her but i do. what if she never knows? i’ll tell her eventually… i will.”

you sit down on her still unmade bed, reading the next page.

“i wanted to kiss her so bad today. ugh. her lips were all red and pouty from the cranberry juice and when she smiled her teeth were all red. she asked why i was smiling at her and i told her that her teeth were all red. she looked so embarrassed and got up to clean them. i felt like an asshole but that’s better than being rejected by her right?”

another one.

“we watched curtis and viper today after patrol. she cooked us chicken and then cried because it was her favorite chicken. this girl has the biggest heart in the world. when the movie was done we just talked about what life would be like if the apocalypse didn’t happen. she said she would have been a teacher or some kind of helping profession. she’s fucking sweet. i told her i’d probably be a dentist or a lawyer. something fun. i left out the part where i’d want to come home to her every night. i’m such a loser. i think i love her.”

the last part made you gasp, except the gasp wasn’t coming from your mouth, it came from the person standing in front of you. ellie.

“what are you doing with that?”

[heartsforfolklore]

scrolling through Pinterest and found the most pre-crash nat core pic of Sophie to exist so now I’m gonna do dating hcs except it’s just me projecting….

sorry

— This pic would be taken by you, her lovely gf, on your your Polaroid or some other camera idk, and that is YOUR CAT in her lap mhm yup yup

— mostly would hang out at your place bc… well yes! she doesn’t want to deal with Vera

— so basically, your room is her safe space. She’ll sneak into your room, maybe climb the tree by your window or throw pebbles at your window till you open up idk

— she has a drawer/closet space in your room

— you are her opposite (this is me projecting btw) like she’s punk, a riot grrrl, kinda snobby when it comes to alt music and culture and you’re like… soft(er) like, Mazzy Star, The Cocteau Twins, Jeff Buckley, The cranberries, The Sunday’s—dreamy/dreamlike music, you read Sylvia Plath, Virginia Woolf, and Dostoevsky, you’re snobby with literature—prob in AP Lit too, (projecting again, sorry) and… she hasn’t touched a book since freshman year LMAO

— you started talking bc you’re a fucking loser loner in PE (haha me) and she’s low-key like Cookie Monster pajama pants girl coded or like the random alt baddie who also doesn’t want to try in PE and like adopts the strays. But like… she’s really athletic so you don’t know why she doesn’t try in PE. Says she’s saving her energy for soccer (it’s like… November, Soccer doesn’t start till the Spring babes..)

— FEMINISTS YUP YUP YUP, ranting about the gender pay gap and the sexist pigs at WHS, (lowkey misandrists but that’s another topic..)

— and if I say bi4bi couple then what? You can both appreciate beauty when you see it.

— she gets you into Hole and Courtney Love

— IF you’re on the soccer team too, you drive her home from practice (and to school, and… like everywhere)

— passenger princess Nat you are real to me. That bitch does NOT have her license 😭

— you mistakenly take her kleptomaniac ass to the mall… she doesn’t get caught but you’re flabbergasted when she pulls out three eyeliner pencils from her bra cause she “ran out”

— makes fun of you the first time you get high together. See, she’s a seasoned professional… you’re not, the most you’ve done is smoked a cigarette because you thought it made you more “mysterious” or like you just came out of an old film noir

— you do the thing where you press the lit ends of the cigarette together to light the other (huzz idk I’ve never smoked but it’s what Stein and Spirit do in Soul Eater 💀)

— cannot hold a job to save her life, and you keep telling her to apply to Hot Topic or Spencer’s but she thinks it’s too cliche

— so basically you have to sugar mama her till she actually gets a job

— she comes over to your house to watch SNL with you and your family, who welcome her like a second (or third, or fourth, or however many siblings you have idk, I’m projecting again) daughter (they don’t know you’re together) and she riffs with your dad and it EMBARRASSES YOU SO BAD.

— you become her rock, it’ll take a while for her to completely open up to you but when you do, know that she intends to keep you around for a long time because she wouldn’t just spill her guts like that to anyone

— she kisses like it’s a sport, sometimes it’s soft and sweet, but not often. Most of the time she’ll just grab your face and kiss your lights out—it’s agressive at the same time as it’s playful. Like, she gets cuteness agression and she just wants to squeeze your cheeks and kiss your puckered lips. SOMEBODY SEDATE ME!!!

— “I’m boredddd” final boss, and maybe it’s unchecked ADHD

— you’re both sat, front row, when The Craft comes out (May 3rd, 1996, trust, you two will be there.)

— furthering the Van and Nat childhood bsfs agenda: they still hang out and Van is the only person she’s told about her sexuality and relationship.

— she was really nervous to kiss you for the first time, like yeah, she’s kissed and gotten cozy with people before but, this was you, and she actually gives a shit about you, because you aren’t just a distraction

— let’s you write your name on her converse

— making zines with each other and cutting up magazines and old newspapers to make the fonts/letters with ransom letters

— back to the mall, you have so many photo booth photos with her, are half of them you guys kissing or her biting your cheek? Well, yes. But who cares, nobody is seeing them but you two.

— on the same note, you use the photo booth as an excuse to make out

— you guys probably got your freak on to Fade into you

— during the fall, you guys go to the Football (American football btw) games to heckle and boo at the players and probably get kicked out of the stands so you guys end up at some shitty fast food place near by

— hitting up the grimiest thrift stores, flipping through racks while Natalie criticizes every basic band tee. She makes fun of you for buying a floral slip dress, then stares way too long when you try it on. (can’t stop staring at her t-t-t-face)

— doesn’t out-right say “I love you” often but has many ways she shows she does; memorizing the lyrics to your favorite songs, getting your favorite drink from the vending machine, eye contact while she kisses the back of your hand/your knuckles. Deffo an “actions speak louder than words” kinda girl.

— she thinks you’re too good for her & often needs reassurance. One of her love languages is words of affirmation.

— historians will say you two are just best friends! It’s the 90s in some no-name town in New Jersey, so things are kept under wraps…

— if you’re a poet, she’s your muse. If she’s a musician (nat band!au??) you’re her muse.

— calls you “pretty” like it’s your name; pretty girl, pretty thing, pretty baby, “hey, pretty” IM SCREAMING!!!! That, or Angel, or My Girl

— call her “my girl” and she’ll melt. She prefers just Nat from you, but doesn’t mind “babe” or “baby” from time to time

— “I don’t believe in god, but I believe that you’re my savior” yeah, shout out Gigi Perez

— will pull you into a bathroom stall during passing period just to kiss you, then will walk out like nothing happened, leaving you stunned

— kiss her scars

— doing her makeup, her painting your nails or her dressing you in her clothes and vice versa

— date nights at shitty fast food places (Taco Bell, White Castle, Checkers, etc.) or drive in movies(lowk greaser!nat vibes w this one..)

— you either help her do her homework or just do it for her, no in between. It’s not that she’s not smart, she just doesn’t try

———⋆✴︎˚｡⋆

sorry if these are bad, like, holy yap fest on my part

[revelboo]

I tried to send this ask before but Tumblr said "Something went wrong" so I am trying again and hopefully you don't get a duplicate:

I have a couple questions 🧐

For science of course 🤭

1. I am wondering, in the universes of your writings, what the difference is in certain details/sensations/anything else between the bots fragging a human vs a fembot. Just curious if you have any thoughts

2. I read your writeup for Megs' size kink 🫣 It made me wonder if your IDW Megs would purposefully mass shift a little less every time, or maybe even mass shift carefully while inside reader, to see how much his little mate/pet can safely take? Idk if mass shifting can be controlled that precisely, and since it isn't possible in real life, idk how safe that is, but this is fanfic so how practical do we need to be? 😅

Also every time you post a new installment you should think of your followers reacting kinda like Knockout in that "This is going to be JUICY" scene lol

I only got it the one time ☺️ I’m just fighting a losing battle

🔞 Mass displaced mech 🌶️

Just my thoughts, but I’d think humans in general are a lot more tactile/sensitive to touch than Cybertronians are. They can feel a touch on their plating or mesh, but certain areas are more sensitive than others. But nothing like our skin. Plating is integrated into their nervous system and sensory nets. They can probably deaden damaged bits after the injury occurs until they can be removed- those damaged bits would be what they salvage pieces from for conjunx gifts. After they’re removed. Or if they’re just a freak like space crack grandpa Megs, they’re sawing bits off themselves with it still attached and synced into their sensory nets.

Meanwhile we’re freakishly sensitive compared to them. We feel everything and we respond to it. I’d figure with a human partner, there’s a lot less prep work needed compared to getting a Cybertronian partner slick and ready to take a spike. And we’re of course, a lot softer than they are, whereas I see a valve being much firmer inside and it can be harder to move freely inside if the valve tightens. So the partner taking the spike can seize control of the encounter and set the pace if they don’t like what their partner is doing or just lock down with the spike inside if they’re being mean. I’d think a lot of the intrigue with humans is a mix of how soft and tight we are around a spike, how easily we respond to the sensations of the ridges or bumps of that spike rubbing inside us, or just the feeling of being stretched, and the size difference between a human and a Cybertronian partner. Even a cassette is going to be bigger than a human. Any mass displaced mech is going to be much bigger still.

I’d think Megatron, Blaster, and Soundwave, basically the bots that have a more pronounced difference between their alt mode’s size and their bot form, have some degree of control over their ability to mass shift compared to other Cybertronians. And yeah, Megs would subtly play with how far he can mass shift and his partner still be able to take his spike even though he’s already much bigger. And he wouldn’t tell them what he’s doing unless he got called out on it

Mass Shifting

Megatron x Reader

• Fingers fisting in your blankets as your breath catches, feeling the faint burn of him stretching you wobbling that knife’s edge between pleasure and pain, you groan. See his lips curl lazily as you force yourself to relax and he slowly slides deep to make your toes curl feeling every ridge of his spike. You’d think as many times as you’ve done this with him, you’d have adjusted to him by now. Big hands palming your hips as he rolls his own to make you arch, you moan.

• Optics half shuttered as he moves against you, attention focused on his spike slowly slipping free of your heat, slicked with you. And you’re wrapped so tight around him, one of your legs sliding against his hip where he’s dragged you to the edge of the berth. Pressing deep, he smiles as you move under him with a gasping moan of protest when he doesn’t move inside you. Splaying his palm against your soft belly, a shudder of arousal twists through him at how much skin his hand covers now. That he can wrap his hands around your waist and his servos overlap. Training you slowly, as he mass shifts a little less each time he claims you. And you’re already so tight, so much smaller under him. Loves watching his spike disappear inside you, listening to those needy sounds you make as you take him.

• Finally he vents and begins to move and even though you’d needed him to move inside you, you aren’t ready. Back arching on a breathy whimper at feel of his thick spike thrusting deep as his hips pump against you. How can he still feel as big as the first time every time? Big hands wrap around your waist as he lifts your hips slightly and you come apart with a startled cry. Groaning, he keeps moving against you, drawing it out until you’re begging mindlessly and he overloads with a snarl, hips rocking against you as he fills you and he’s making a mess, filling you in excess. And the wet sound of his spike inside you when he starts moving again is almost obscene, your body heating again in response.