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#like it truly doesn't matter nothing is good enough in general
thecherrygod · 3 months
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#my posts#you know how this usually goes#i make an amount of tags so that if you read this its bc you've clicked and its not bc i am just posting it like whatever lmao#... unsure if i should even post it tho but what else do i do just leave it in my brain? idk maybe its the same maybe its better#maybe its worse? .... why have i been feeling kind of like this and at this kind of intensity for like about 2 weeks or more#2 weeks is how long ive been properly aware so i think its more but like. man.#like maybe its been like a month and i just havent been keeping track of time bc january is way too long to even try lmao#. but. idk. i just wish i could be kinda.. stable. like i cant feel good lmao#like it truly doesn't matter nothing is good enough in general#what i do isnt good enough#what goes on around me doesnt help trying to ignore the constant.. dread?#and like all things considered i should be doing good currently#or at least not this bad#but here i am constantly trying to not let myself feel too bad until im alone bc man.#so... yeah it just doesnt feel like anything is truly worth it not me as a person nor the things i do nor the things i experience lmao#also lately ive been just feeling more..... disconnected to others... like i dont understand them and they dont understand me#but like.. more than usual#and i guess its me? that it's kind of a me problem#idk I'm just tired. i need to sleep. i want to let face down on some sort of big water body or do something that will make my life worse#or they i will regret lmao#i. wont do any of those#also when i mean face down in some sort of bldy of water or whatever i dont necessarily mean like die#not against it but its not the only option#just lay there and float..... also not against it#i just want something that i cant have i guess bc im not sure what it is#like i just know what i want is to not constantly feel like this but idk how lmao#... u would sleep if i can bc man also I'm so tired#.... adding tags its a bit worse than I assumed lmao im also thinking about wether i deserve stuff or not lmao#like it got windy and cooler and i was like 'a blanket by my legs would be nice' only to be like 'no you don't deserve that ' like ah yeah#its kinda worse than i thought lmao
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You look lonely.
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《 VirginRockstar!Eddie munson x GroupieFem!Reader
《 Summary: Eddie finally had it all, success, money, and fame. There was still one tiny problem he had.
《 Warnings: unprotected sex, Eddie is 25. Virgin!Eddie, multiple orgasms, over stimulation. Loss of virginity. Brief mention of birth control, subish eddie. A little spanking.
《 Word count: a little over 8k
A/n: Not proofread ignore any mistakes you come across. Please like, comment, and reblog to show support. Divider credit @cafekitsune
18+ minors dni
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Year 1991
Eddie's life was at an all-time high. He had everything he only dreamt about back home in Hawkins, Indiana. He had money, fame, and adoring fans who loved him. Yet he still never had the opportunity to make a real connection with anyone. He still hasn't found the one.
Which was fine he didn't really need anyone right now. His life was too hectic for a partner. He was traveling all over the world meeting new people every night. He put all of his time and energy into music, and it paid off in the end.
He's surrounded by beautiful models and actresses, but never has he once been lucky enough to be intimate with any of them. He was a nervous and shy guy even after success. He never changed. He was still Eddie. Sweet, shy, and the same nerdy man who loved to play DnD and read Tolkien.
Eddie did have plenty of opportunities to lose his virginity in the past, but he was terrified. Most people would assume he was getting laid left and right. He's read the gossip magazines. He knows what people think of him. While he can talk up a big game, once it's time to get down to it, he just... doesn't.
He runs away. He gets too much in his own head. What if I'm terrible? What if everyone finds out I'm still a virgin at twenty-five? Those thoughts raced in his mind anytime he took a woman out on date, knowing they were expecting to hook up with this crazy rockstar.
His fear of rejection held him back, and now his fear of being a total disappointment was the new cause. He knows there's truly nothing wrong with still being a virgin. it's society who has a problem with it. Normally Eddie wouldn't give two fucks what people thought about him, but this was different. Most days, he actually doesn't care at all or even thinks about it. Until he's alone in bed with nothing but his overthinking brain.
All that would change once he saw you in the crowd. Not blinking. Then he saw you again when he snuck backstage to his dressing room. He managed to somehow sneak past a group of girls without much notice, hiding behind large security guards.
You were standing off to the side next to a crowd full of half-naked women. Eddie didn't mind all of you being there. As a matter of fact, he enjoyed the view after walking off stage. A crowd full of women willing to be his for the night. If only they knew.
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Tonight was your first Corroded Coffin show. You've been waiting months to finally see them live. They have been on their world tour for almost a full year. Eddie Munson, their lead singer and guitarist, has had your eye since you first saw them being interviewed on Headbangers Ball.
The moment you saw those eyes and long hair, you were hooked. Once you found out they were coming to your hometown, you rushed to buy the tickets. You were already familiar with the security at the venue they were playing. So, getting backstage access wouldn't be a problem. One of the perks of making friends with the employees.
You didn't sleep with every band that came into town. Only the ones that peaked your interest. You'd never be caught dead in some glam metal band members' hotel room. You liked the thrasher types. The ones who looked like they hadn't slept in days. The bands who were loud and aggressive. Those were your types. The guys in that scene were generally more sweet and down to earth. Which is why you gravitated towards them. If you were good to them, they were good to you.
Corroded Coffin live at The Whiskey a go-go on October 31st, 1991.
You held the ticket in your hand, shaking with excitement. You were finally going to see them in person. You were actually going to meet Eddie Munson. Being a groupie wasn't something you ever intended on happening. It just did. You loved the music first and then got to love the people who created it second.
You weren't too fond being labeled a groupie. You genuinely enjoyed the company of these rockstars. It was never just about sex. You made a real connection and friendship with most of them. You always knew there would be no romantic feelings between yourself and whoever it was you got to know for the night. Or a few nights.
Only two days until Corroded Coffin would be in your city. You bought two tickets just in case your best friend wanted to tag along. She never really enjoyed this scene the same way you did. There was a thrill and rush you got that she never experienced or cared to. Still, you bought the extra ticket just to be on the safe side. Maybe she'd like to share Eddie with you. If she was down. You don't know why you were so sure he'd give you the time of day. But you were.
You were very sure of yourself that you could have him. Most bands had an after-party at their hotel when the show was over. They'd all gather on the bus with whatever groupie of their choosing and head off. That was your plan. Get backstage. Introduce yourself to Eddie and hope he takes you to the party....if they have one. Party or not, you were going to be his.
You've heard the rumors. You read the magazines and seen him out and about with some of the most famous women in Hollywood. The groupies that walked the sunset strip all had a little tale of how he was in bed. They would describe him as rough or very giving. Sometimes both. Some said he was gentle.
Others would say he was an asshole who kicked you out after he got what he wanted. You know, most of the time, you needed to take what they said with a grain of salt. From your past experiences with other bands. Their little stories were fabricated or over dramatized for the sake of attention.
Make no mistake that you didn't just want to sleep with him. You wanted to be his friend. Talk to him about his music. Have a connection with him. Listen to any crazy stories he might have. You wanted to have a life like Pamela Des Barres.
Where songs are written about you. Getting special treatment and tour the world with them. Have a rockstar fall for you even though that's a big no-no. You don't fall in love. You don't get romantic feelings. No matter how deep of a connection you get with one of them. It's hard not to. You idolize these men and women. But you knew it would only end in heartbreak for you.
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The night of the concert you decided to go early and sweet talk the security so they'll let you backstage. You knew them pretty well by now. They know why you're there and have no problems with it. Your friend didn't tag along like you were hoping, but you're used to it. You'd figure you would chat it up with some of the other girls' backstage. They weren't your favorite to talk to. Too much jealousy and competition amongst them for your liking, but if gave you something to do in the meantime.
-
Eddie had been scrambling around all day long, getting ready for tonight's concert. He made sure his hair looked nice and his clothes were laid out on his hotel bed. He's been hitting the gym a lot more lately. So his clothing choice consisted of no shirt and just jeans half the time. He's got a lot more tattoos since the last tour he has done. A full chest piece and both arms down to his knuckles covered in ink. He looked a little different now compared to just three years ago.
He was nervous. Eddie was always nervous before a show. No matter if there was a crowd of five people or hundreds. He was scared. He puts too much pressure on himself. He compares himself to his idols too often. Something he knows he shouldn't do, but he can't help himself. He was going to the venue early and helping the roadies unpack and set up the equipment.
Eddie figured he'd meet up with the guys and do sound checks and then help his team get everything ready. They were playing at the Whiskey. A venue Eddie was very familiar with. He's spent most of his time in the crowd watching his favorite bands play up on that stage. Eddie never imagined there would come a point he'd be playing up there, too.
Back at the venue, you were talking it up with one girl you've grown pretty close to. You didn't know her personally, but she was at the same shows you always frequented. Her name was Lila, and she looked like she walked right out of a penthouse centerfold. Long bleached blonde hair, big breasts and legs for days. Most of the other girls hated her, but she was always very sweet. She didn't make up one night stand stories to get "popular." If she didn't hook up with a certain guy, then she'd tell you. She never lied. Which is why you've grown to respect her.
"I hope we get to meet Eddie after the show ." She bounced from one heeled foot to the next. A large smile plastered on her face.
"Me too." You chuckled, watching as she struggled to contain her excitement.
"Doesn't matter which one of us takes him home as long as it is not one of those Debbie downers over there." She leaned forward to whisper.
"Why not have us both?" You joked.
Her jaw dropped." Yes! He can have us both."
You shake your head and pull her to walk over out by the side stage. You always got the best view from there. No one shoves or pushes you out the way. Plus, you could be very close to the band. Which is exactly what you wanted. The sound tech guys were busy putting everything together as the roadies were bringing in the equipment.
That's when you noticed him. Hair pulled back in a low ponytail. His bangs are longer, and loose strands of hair fell beside his face. He wasn't wearing a shirt, just pants and a chain around his neck. The tattoos on his arms and chest on full display for you. Eddie was getting the amps on stage with the rest of the crew. You heard them make a joke about which girl in the back they'd pick out for him. But you didn't care about that. You couldn't take your eyes away. He was truly more beautiful in person than on TV.
Eddie glanced your way a few times when he noticed a couple of people off to the side watching. He felt a blush creep its way up to his cheeks when he saw you gawking at him. Eddie still wasn't the best around women if he didn't prep himself first. He was a good flirt, but the moment he noticed they were checking him out, he'd turn beet red. The little blonde standing next to you had her eyes on the road crew.
You saw him make eye contact with you a few times, and your mouth went dry. You've been with plenty of rockstars before, but none of them have ever given you butterflies the way Eddie did. His big brown eyes look straight into yours, and your breath hitches. You tried to elbow Lila and get her attention, but she was too busy checking out a roadie. She was like that.
It didn't matter if they were the ones playing onstage or working for the band. If she found them attractive, she went for it. You nudged and nudged desperately, trying to get her attention as Eddie's eyes never left yours. But all you heard was her giggle next to you as she eyed up and down the guitar tech. "Alright, Ed, time for sound check." You saw Jeff peek his head from around the corner.
You lost her now. Her focus was not on Eddie anymore but his roadie. You wouldn't be surprised if she even stayed to watch the show.
Only an hour until the show starts and you were getting antsy. Lila was gone. She left not too long after the stage was officially set up. You knew where she ventured off to. Didn't take a rocket scientist to figure that out. You just wish you weren't alone. There was something so...exciting about tonight. You've been to plenty of rock concerts, but this one was different. You didn't want to experience it alone.
Corroded Coffin were still considered newcomers. Who got very big very fast. There wasn't a magazine on a stand that didn't have Eddie's face on it. From tabloids to Spin magazine. He was on it. The thrill of getting to experience him in person was coursing through your veins.
There was this lump of excitement in your throat. You wanted to scream. Get it all out. You made up your mind that you were going back to his tour bus or hotel room. He was going to be yours for the night. It didn't matter how many women were lined up for his picking. It was going to be you.
Finally, the lights dim, and the crowd has already gathered to their designated spots. You were still off to the side. Gazing up at the smokey harsh purple haze lighting up the stage. There is a backdrop with huge black lettering reading Corroded Coffin hanging up high. Gareth is already at his drum set, setting up for the rest of the guys to make their grand entrance.
Each member emerges from behind the curtain with a roar from this pretty large crowd. Jeff and Grant waved to the sea of people. The crowd is alive, and you can feel it. That electricity is pumping in your veins. The place was packed. Maximum compacity is five hundred, but you know there is way more than that here tonight.
The mic in the middle of the front stage stays empty. Eddie still has yet to come out and introduce his band. The crowd is getting more and more wild. The other members play some instrumental songs to help hold everyone over until he arrives.
The band picks up speed, and the lights switch from a purple haze to red. The entire stage was glowing. The smoke on the stage gets thicker. The crowd forms a mosh pit right off to the side from you. Some of them sneak on stage to dive back into the crowd.
Your eyes have not left the stage. Not once. You kept glancing back from the mic stand to the curtain. You wouldn't lie. You were getting impatient. Extremely impatient. You wish you still had Lila with you so you could have someone to talk to as time passed. Knowing her, you probably won't be seeing her around until the next band is in town.
You blinked, and there he was. A guitar slung over his chest. His hair hanging loose around his shoulders. The shirt he was wearing now tore and cut shows off all of his tattoos. He doesn't say anything. He makes his way to the mic with a cocky smirk on his face. Watching the sea of arms waving out for him. The band never slows. Eddie starts belting out lyrics to their newest single. His voice growling in the mic. You'll never understand how these guys can do this almost every night for months on end.
The veins in his neck buldging out with every passing lyric. The crowd here tonight has never been like this before. There was something so special about witnessing a group with so much energy and passion that it's passed off to the crowd. The floor beneath your feet vibrating. You can't tell if it's from the music or the stampede next to you. Whatever it was, it had you mesmerized.
Your eyes still never left, Eddie. He stopped playing for a short moment to address the crowd. "How is everybody doing tonight?!" The contrast bewildered you. Between his speaking voice and singing voice definitely would give anyone whiplash.
He scanned the crowd, looking at how chaotic it had been since he arrived. Eddie looks off the side and sees you there. Same spot at earlier. You must look utterly hypnotized, and truth be told you were. You couldn't look away. He's got some kind of hold on you. He smirks and looks back to the rest of the audience, but every so often would make eye contact with you.
Song after song, you noticed guitar picks landing by your feet. You hadn't seen the first three times it was done. Too busy watching him thrash away on his guitar. You're surprised it's still able to play after the beating he's given it. He's playing so fast his hand looks like a blur. A pick slapping you in the chest snaps you back to reality. You bend to retrieve it and notice there are now five picks total all by your feet. They're a crimson red with E.M. scratched in the back.
Eddie had been throwing his picks at you the whole time. You hadn't noticed until he plucked one so hard at your chest that you felt it through your t-shirt. He moves over to your side of the stage and crouches down so he's almost eye level with you. He's so close you can touch him if you wanted. Eddie plays the solo of their final song of the night right in front of you. It was like he was playing it for you. Time stood still. Just the two of you and the music. You didn't even realize you stopped breathing until he got up and walked away. Giving you one last look over his should.
Eddie goes back to stand at his microphone. His confidence is through the roof. His stance is proud. "Thank you so fucking much for coming out to see us tonight. We are Corroded Coffin!" He growls that last part out, and the crowd erupt so loud you know your ears will be ringing tomorrow. The vibration on the floor intensified. You were surprised that it hasn't collapsed in yet.
One by one, the members exit the stage. Leaving Eddie to be the last. He looked back at you one last time and gave a little wave. Did he really just wave at you? No must have been to someone else. Definitely not you. You kept telling yourself.
There is no way. He was giving you a lot of attention tonight. Maybe he was? You kept arguing back and forth in your mind as you headed out.
Before you can even try to find the backstage area again, there is a security guard handing you a pass. That was awfully quick, but you don't dwell on it. All you wanted was to find Lila and Eddie.
You rush to the back and see her sitting on a case that holds one of their bigger amps. Her hair is disheveled, and her makeup all smeared. "Where did you go?"
She jumps, "Oh hey!! I got preoccupied."
"How was the show?"
You snort. "It was amazing. They were amazing. He was amazing."
"Babe, that's great. Are you going to the after-party at their penthouse?" Lila goes to stand and smooths down her dress. "The roadie.. I forgot his name told me about it."
"Oh, I'm definitely going. The security guard gave me a pass. I'm sure Eddie told him to give it to me. He had been throwing these at me all night." You go into your pocket to show her one of his picks he had been hitting you with.
Her eyes widened, and a smile spreads across her face. "He wants youuu."
She looked over at the other girls, who were now ease dropping on your conversation. She rolled her eyes and went back to give you a big hug. A bright smile stretched across her face.
"Let's get going. There is another little roadie I got my eye on." She hooks an arm around yours, guiding you to the exit doors.
You don't see Eddie anywhere. He's not out mingling with any of the backstage crew or fans. You figured he was getting cleaned up after the show. He did look very sweaty. His shirt clung to his skin, and his bangs stuck to his forehead. You were positive you would see him at the after party.
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The after-party was at this luxury hotel in the penthouse suite. Jeff, Grant, Gareth, and Eddie all had their own hotel rooms but used this one for mingling after their concert. There were tons of people here. Lila left you behind again the moment she walked through those double doors. She saw her roadie and planted herself in his lap and never got up.
You dabbled in conversation with their crew and had a pretty good talk with Jeff. He was the calm one of the band, and Grant was the funny one. When they got to bickering, it was like watching an old married couple. Grant would say some stupid joke, and Jeff would rub at his temple like he just came down with the worst migraine of his life.
While you were busy conversing with them, you kept scanning the room for Eddie. The sole reason you were even here to begin with. He wasn't here. At least not yet. You were wondering if maybe he found someone else to spend his night with. The thought of that riddled you with disappointment. Was he even the one who gave you the pass?
That didn't stop you from looking. The more you looked for him, the less engaged you were with the two men in front of you. The drink in your hand has become room temperature. More people have now rushed to join the party. The air was thick with smoke. The music was loud, and you started to feel suffocated. You excused yourself from the conversation to go to a less occupied area away from everyone.
As you're making your way past drunk person after drunk person, you see him. Eddie's standing off to the side with a glass in hand that contained a dark liquid. He looks freshly showered. His hair is still a little damp at the ends. You decided to muster up some courage and walk over to where he was tucked away all alone.
"You look lonely." You remark watching his face closely.
He swirls the brown liquid in the glass, causing the ice to clink. "Nah, jus' wanted a moment to cool down." He stared ahead watching the party.
"You know, just one pick would've been enough." You joked, hoping to lighten his mood a little. Eddie was coming off dismissive, but he's was just shy. He's never been good with small talk. As a matter of fact, he hated small talk it always felt forced more than anything.
He snorts, "Sorry bout that you weren't really noticing the first three I plucked your way, though."
"That's fair...."
You eye him and down, taking him all in. He looked good. Eddie notices you checking him out, too. His bites his inner cheek to keep calm. You're looking at him like you want to devour him whole.
"Wanna go somewhere more quiet?" You place a hand on his forearm and lean in a little close.
"It's pretty loud in here. I can't really hear you." You played innocent. You know what you were doing, and Eddie definitely knew what you were doing.
He gulps "Uhhh...sure". He straightens himself up, clearing his throat. He needs to keep his composure. But for how long? Would tonight be the night?
This alway happened he would invite a girl to his room or they would invite him somewhere. Things would get hot and heavy, and right when it was time to fuck he'd kick them out. Too embarrassed to be a disappointment for them. He'd rather be called an asshole than terrible at sex. Tonight? Tonight was going to be different.
He set his drink down by a near table and takes you by the hand leading you out a door you had no idea was there. Eddie walks you down an empty hallway until he's stopping at his room door. He takes his key out and looks back to see you behind him, staring at the fancy carpet. He was nervous but so were you. Just a little. Eddie had a bit of liquid courage in him tonight. He's usually a beer guy but decided to go for something harder to celebrate how great of a show tonight was.
There is a click, and soon he's pushing open the door. "You first." As he bows letting you enter.
You make your way in the room as he flicks on the lights behind you. It was large with a couch facing a king-sized bed. You take your jacket off, and he does the same. Eddies wearing a shirt that if it had anymore holes wouldn't even be considered wearable anymore. It does show off his arms and tattoos, so you're not complaining.
Throwing your jacket on the side of his couch, "You guys were really good tonight."
"Thanks the crowd was fucking insane." Eddie's making himself another drink at the mini bar. "Thought they were gonna go through the floor."
"Want one?" He offers calling over to you.
Shaking your head. "No, I had quit enough earlier, actually."
He nods respectfully at your decline.
Rounding the corner of his bar, he comes to plop down beside you, spilling a little of his drink on him. He's watching you closely, and you've never felt more nervous around anyone else before. You've done this plenty of times. Take a rockstar back to their room. Have some fun, and then stay a little while or leave. No one has ever made your heart skip a beat other than Eddie Munson. Who is now watching you intently. In this moment, you really wish Lila was here too.
You do it. You go right for it. This is why you're here. Why he took you to his room with no amount of hesitation. Leaning forward, you capture his lips with yours in a feverish kiss. You can taste brandy on his mouth as your tongue swips his bottom lip for access. Eddie still holding on to his drink, and the other is firmly planted beside him. You stop coming up for air. His chest is heaving, and his pupils are blown.
Eddies doesn't say anything. He was too caught up on from your kiss. He leans back in the cushions. Letting his legs spread wider apart. You take that as an opportunity to straddle his lap. Eddie stared up at you, and before you could say anything. His plump lips were already on yours. You grind down against him feeling his semi hard cock through his pants. He grunts in your mouth as your tongues fight for dominance.
You press down harder in his lap, desperately looking for any small amount of friction you could get. Wetness is already pooling between your legs. His hands move to grip on your ass hard as he helps you move against him.
You kept thinking to yourself that this wasn't real. You're actually not sitting in Eddie Munson's lap making out in his hotel room. He moans when he feels your hand dip down to rub his cock. Feeling how hard he was getting in his jeans.
Eddie breaks the kiss and stills your movements on him. "Wait, you don't wanna do this with me. He frowns.
"Why wouldn't I?" You're confused. Does he not like you? Does he not find you attractive and is only saying this to be nice so you'd leave? So many thoughts rush through your head in just a couple of seconds.
"I dunno. I just think you might be let down a little." His voice is small. He's not the big loud rockstar that was screaming just hours ago.
Eddie still won't dare look at you. Too afraid of rejection even to this day if he told you the truth.
Your brows furrow, and you laugh in disbelief, "Why would I be let...down? "
He rolls his eyes and lets out an exasperated groan. He moves to get up, and you go to sit back in your spot on the couch.
Pinching the bridge of his nose. His lips were in a thin line. He was annoyed and embarrassed. Mostly with himself.
".....fuck I guess now is the time." He muttered under his breath.
"Ive never done this before." Eddie waved from himself to you. Hoping you got what he was trying to say so he didn't have to blurt it all out.
"Huh, do what? You're still so confused, but you're trying to understand him.
Not only did his music mean so much to you, but he did as well. Corroded Coffin was the first band you truly clung on to. The first band that you actually bought a ticket to see instead of sneaking in and stealing a seat. Seeing him struggle to find his words was truly tough to watch. You have so much respect and admiration for him. The last thing you want is to see him upset over something.
"It's okay Eddie whatever it is, you can tell me. It won't make me think any less of you. You tried to reassure him.
He takes a deep breath, "Fucking hell I can't believe I'm about about tell you this...I'm a virgin."
You blinked back, thinking he was just messing around. He was known to pull little pranks on people. "Shut up, you're lying. I've heard the rumors."
"Yeah, that's what they are, rumors, all lies." He chews on his thumb nail out of nervousness. Would you laugh at him now? Is he still this amazing rockstar? "It won't make me think any less of you." Yours words ring in his head, but were they true?
"B-but you've gone out with like very famous women." It's not that you didn't believe him or that this was a bad thing. He was a famous rockstar who could have anyone he wanted.
"Nothing ever happened, sure. I tried to get to know them and have a serious relationship, but most of them just used me to shed whatever good girl image they had going." Eddie confessed. There was a hint of sadness in his voice.
"So... You're telling the truth?"
"Yeah, I understand if you wanna leave." His tone was harsh, but he didn't mean for it to come off that way. He is getting defensive to protect himself from humiliation.
"I don't wanna go." You move to stand in front of him. "Do you want me to leave?"
"No," Eddie's voice is barely above a whisper. He finally looks at you, and his face softens when he sees no amount of judgment coming from you.
"Let's get on the bed." You push him so he flops back on the mattress. Standing between his legs hanging off the side, bare feet firmly planted on the floor. His shoes having long been discarded.
Slowly, you strip yourself of your top, pulling it above your head as he watched your tits bounce as you lift the shirt. You weren't wearing a bra, and you were thankful for that. One less article of clothing to getting in the way. Next was your jeans, and you carefully inched them down your legs along with your panties. Eddies eyes stayed glued to you as you became completely bare before him.
"You ever touched a girl before?" You crawl on top of him sitting just below his cock straining painfully against his zipper.
He scoffs, rolling his eyes. "Yes, I've touched tits before."
"Not tits..here." You laugh, taking his hand and putting it between your legs. He lets out a shakey breath. Feeling the wetness between your legs as you feel his calloused fingers explore your entrance. Your slick coating his fingertips, getting them nice and sticky.
"Oh," he marveled, his eyes focusing on where his hand currently was.
"I'm gonna make you feel so good, Eddie." You purred.
You bite back a moan as he continued to explore at your opening. Your hand gripped at his wrist.
"Fuck." He cursed under his breath. Your pussy felt so inviting. Dripping wet like it was crying out for him. Begging and pleading to be fucked.
His finger glided up between your folds until they're grazing your aching clit. "Mmm, that feels so good." You praised and move both of your hands to place them on his chest.
Eddies watching and studying your face. His fingers rubbing sloppy slow circles on your throbbing clit. Your slick dripping down your inner thighs. You moan out his name and it takes everything in Eddie not to cum on the spot.
"Take your clothes off." You breathed heavy, feeling yourself already getting close.
He sat up quickly as you helped remove his shirt and pants. Leaving him in nothing but his blue checkered boxers. Tiny beads of sweat already forming on his face and tattooed chest. You take a moment to admire the dark inck, covering him almost up all the way up to his neck. You know It must have taken hours or even days to finish.
He lays there waiting. Watching and waiting for your next move or instructions. Whatever you were going to do, he was ready for it. Anything you wanted, he's all ears. Eddie was yours for the night as he wasn't going to chicken out this time. No running.
His cock forming a large tent in his underwear already. You can see a small wet patch from his pre cum. "Can I kiss you?"
He nods, moving forward to plant his lips to yours. You giggle, "Not on the mouth."
"Im talking about right there." You run your thumb over his leaking tip that's trapped in his boxers. A mischievous grin creeping up on your face.
Eddie looks a little dazed. Like he can't believe this actually happening to him right now. "Y-yeah."
You pull his boxers down letting his cock free. His tip was an angry shade of red, precum dripping down his cock. Your mouth salivating at his length. His cock was thick with prominent running down his shaft. It laid nicely against his belly button.
"You have such a pretty cock." You cooed taking his length in your hand. Eddie hisses from your touch. He's so sensitive that any amount of attention will send him just about over the edge.
His head falls back, and you can see his Adam's apple bounce when he swallows. He blows out a breath of air, trying to focus.
"Oh shit." He whispered to himself.
You take the opportunity to lick a strip up the side of his cock. He groans deep from his chest. He was going to cum he just knows it. With his cock still in your hand you slap the head of his cock on your tongue tasting the saltiness of his pre cum. Wrapping your lips around the head, you swirl and suck on him gently. Eddie throws an arm over to cover up face. His other hand clawing at the white duvet.
"I-if you don't stop, I'm not gonna last much longer." He managed to stammer out. Your mouth too busy working on his sensitive tip to even care.
You remove his cock to speak, "That's kinda the point."
Wrapping your soft lips back around him. You suck much harder this time, and his hips involuntarily buck. You smile, feeling a boost of confidence you are getting this type of reaction out of him. Felt like getting a little cocky. you decided to take him further in your mouth until he hit the back of your throat.
His abdomen flexing as his release builds. Your throat swallowing around his length. You pull him almost all the way out before taking him in your mouth fully again. Your head bobbing up and down his shaft. His hips bucking up again making his cock go deeper in your throat. You gag slightly as spit drips down your chin.
Eddies still hiding his face from you. His cheeks flushed. "Fuck....I'm gonna cum."
You bob your faster. You take absolutely no sympathy on him. You want him to finish. You want to taste and feel his cum sliding down the back of your throat. You say something in audible as your mouth is currently stuffed full. Your jaw is hurting and going slack. But you don't care.
Your main goal for right now is not only to make him cum, but make him do it as many times as he can handle. With no warning, Eddie grabs your hair and keeps your head in place while thrusting up in your mouth, making it difficult for you to catch your breath. Your nose brushes against the soft curls of his with each thrust he gave. His hips raising off the bed to push his cock in the back of your throat.
"Mmphf, ooh shit." He grunts, shooting ropes of cum down your throat. The saltiness of his cum is all you can taste. Eddies relentlessly fucking your mouth the way he wants to fuck your pussy as he rides out his orgasm.
Every low groan emitted deep from his chest causes your pussy to flutter, sending a shiver down your spine.
He lets go of you, and you remove him from your throat with a loud pop. His cum and your saliva dripping from the corners of your mouth.
"Christ, I'm sorry." Eddie apologized, He really tried not to cum so suddenly. He really really did.
You coughed a little, finally able to breathe normally again. "It's okay."
"Yeah, but... what about you?" He asked as guilt was starting to set in. He didn't want you leaving with ache between your legs that wasn't satisfied.
"Who said we were done?" You smile deviously at him. His cock still semi hard on his belly. You lay beside him, running your fingernails against his length. He gasps and lets out a whimper.
The difference between this Eddie and the one on stage is something you'll never forget. His cock twitches and you can feel him getting hard under your touch.
"Scoot up on the bed for me." You instructed, wanting him to get nice and comfortable before continuing.
Eddie listened and moved higher up on the bed until his head hit the pillows.
You move to straddle him. His cock sitting just above your pussy. He's looking at you in awe. Like you're the most beautiful woman he's ever seen, and he's completely at your mercy. And you are. And he is. As of right now, if you told him to run naked down the hallways, he'd do it. Eddie would do anything you told him to.
You rise and scoot forward some more so his cock is between your wet fold. You rock back and forth on him. He moan as you rubbed yourself on his cock. Your aching clit is finally getting some much needed attention. His chest is rising and falling rapidly.
Eddie moves his hands so they're holding on tight to your hips. You grind on him harder and faster. Your juices soaking his thick cock. That's it he was going to cum again. It was too much. What was left of his cum you didn't clean off was currently making a mess all over your pussy.
"F-fucking! hell." Eddie breathed, his fingers digging deep into your skin. He could feel another orgasm approaching him.
You felt yourself growing closer, too. The veins on his cock pulsating between your legs. Your pussy rubbing against him so deliciously. His tip nudging at your clit. Your legs tremble. Eddie bites down hard on his bottom lip almost drawing blood. His eyes glossed over. He was in pure extacy.
Eddie couldn't get enough. The feeling of his cock gliding between your slippery wet folds. It was driving him wild. If just by doing this felt incredible. Then he can't even comprehend what it must feel like to be buried in your pussy.
You had him drooling and unable to think straight. Nothing his own hand and a dirty magazine has ever been able to accomplished. Whatever his own imagination concocted was nothing compared to you. Nothing at all.
"You....this--fuck I can't even talk." Eddies whimpering and whining under you. He has a vice grip going from your ass and back to your hips. Moving them to hold on for dear life or smoothing over the softness of your skin.
"Oh my god!" he croaked. The bed rocking back and forth as you grinded on his cock. The pictures on the wall shake as you go faster. He watches as your breasts bounce, putting him in a trance.
Your climax quickly approaching, but you try to push it back. You wanted him to cum. You'll get yours later.
You feel him twitch again, and he curses under his breath. The grip he has on your hips starts to hurt. "I'm cuming...oh fuck I'm cuming." You haven't stopped moving as his cum shoots out onto his stomach and chest. Tears spring to his eyes and pour down his cheeks. Both of your minds are clouded. You stop grinding, letting him come down from his high.
He lays there limp arms out stretched after letting you go.
"I..youre so fucking amazing." Eddie finally spoke up.
You move back off him letting his cock rest up before you continued anymore. If only others could see him right now. Completely fucked out and you've only just begun. His skin is shiny with a sheen of sweat in the lighting of his hotel room. Eddie would never forget this moment or you for that matter. If he could take you on tour with him and never let you leave, he would.
"Hey, pretty boy, you okay?" You coaxed, running a hand down his cheek.
He doesn't speak, still trying to collect himself. "Mmhmm." Was all you managed to get out of him. His cock was surprisingly still hard.
"Are you ready to feel me now?" You leaned over to whisper in his ear. Licking a strip up his throat before biting down, leaving a tiny little bruise behind.
"Fuck yes." His husky voice as he replied. His eyes are closed, preparing himself for you.
Eddie was ready for this. More than ready. He made himself wait long enough out of fear and anxiety.
"Need your cock so bad." You playfully whine. Hearing that drove him crazy. He doesn't think he'll ever tire listening to someone beg for his cock from now on. Not after tonight.
You smile and move to lean up. Taking his length in your hand and aligning him up at your opening. His breath hitches as you take just his tip in you. Eddies mouth hangs open as he watches you slowly sink down on his length.
You take him inch by inch teasing him as you do. He's so thick it's going to take time adjusting to his size. You don't think you're ever going to feel as full as you will tonight. Somehow, you wonder if Eddie truly knows just how big he is. He has to have an idea? Right?
You continue sinking down on his cock while its spreading you open. It was pleasure and a little pain feeling him splitting you open like this. Your pussy dripping for him. "Ooh, Eddie."
He's biting hard on his closed fist. Fighting hard to contain whatever animalistic moan is threatening to escape. The tip of his cock is a shade of red that's almost purple. The veins in his neck protruding out.
"Please fuck me." He begged you.
Eddie Munson just begged you to fuck him. He's actually begging.
you most definitely are not forgetting tonight and will most certainly never tell anyone. Not even Lila. Sorry, she had a chance to be here and instead picked a roadie. The boost of confidence that just surged through your body after hearing him.
"I-i don't care what you do jus fuck me oh fff-god please!" Eddie whined as he rushed to feel your pussy hugging around his cock.
"Relax, I'm g'nna fuck you." You teased.
Finally you bury him deep inside you until his cock has fully disappeared. You both sigh in unison at the relief. You sit still, allowing yourself to get used to the intrusion. You roll your hips, taunting him a little.
"Sweetheart, dont tease me. I need you." He begs you some more.
"Mmf! god!, you're so big." You whimper. Eddie's cock stretched your sensitive walls the way no one else ever has.
You brace your hands on his abdomen. Eddie, out of nowhere, slaps your ass hard. He was growing extremely impatient all of a sudden. Grabbing your attention immediately. You nod, blowing out a breath of air. Rolling your hips some more before lifting them up and slamming yourself back down on him. His pubic hair tickling at your clit. Your both moaning together as his hips thrust up to meet yours. His tip hit that spongey spot on your walls.
"Fuck fuck... it hurts", Eddie cried with a strangled moan.
"Want me to stop?" You asked stopping yourself from gliding your pussy on his length.
"No! Don't stop!" He half shouts.
"I like it."
You quirk an eyebrow at him. His eyes look into yours, pleading for you to keep going. You lift yourself up and gingerly sink back down on his cock.
"Faster." Eddie demanded with a croak in his voice. You don't hesitate for a second. You lift up and start bouncing on his length at a frantic pace.
The springs in the mattress squeaked from how hard you rode him. Eddies face twisting up, and you know he's about to cum once more. He's blabbering nonsense beneath you. Mumbling to himself, "it hurts... so good," and "You're so tight."
He moves one of his hands to grip and spank your ass harshly. You know he is probably mimicking what he's seen in porn but you dont mind. You enjoyed it. Your pussy making a loud wet schlick noise as Eddie's cock stretched you open.
"Ahh! Eddie." You moan out for him.
"Keep fucking me.....dont stop. Dont f-fking stop." He grunts. His eyes half lidded as he watched you ride his cock. "Goddamn, you're wet!"
You feel your release building back up. You reach a hand between your legs as Eddie watched you. You rub tight circles on your sore bud.
He leans up on his elbows, looking on as you play with yourself. He was getting close again. Another orgasm threatening to spill out of him. Eddie is surprised he's about to give you another. he knows he's about to cum for the third time tonight.
"W-wanna cum again for you." Eddie lets out a small whimper. He sounded so needy.
"Oooh baby." You mewl. Your mouth creating an O shape. Your eyes are closed tight, and your thighs shake. You feel that coil in your belly tightening. "Spank me again." You begged him.
Eddie does as he's told and slaps your ass hard, causing it to ripple. The sound of skin slapping bouncing off the wallpapered room.
He feels your walls pulsing around his cock and he thrusts up repeatedly hitting that spongey spot inside you just right. Your hand moving faster circles on your clit as you struggle to keep riding him.
Eddie keeps thrusting his cock up in your pussy over and over again. It doesn't take much longer before your orgasm is ripping through your body. You let out moan that almost resembles a scream. He's watching you come undone before him. A hint of pride hits him, knowing it was him who did that to you. You won't be surprised if hotel security is called to check and see if any is hurt. The noises coming from this room would cause anyone to be concerned.
Your nails digging in his chest while his cock helps you ride out your orgasm. Your body spasms above him. You lean forward to bury your face in the crook of his neck. You stay like that while Eddies sweaty skin and leftover cologne invading your nose. Sitting back up your mind feeling foggy and your face tingles. White dots appearing in front of you.
"Sweetheart I-I can't cum inside you." Eddie rasped his face tear stained. His eyes look at you sadly.
"I'm on the pill it's okay." You reassured.
He nods and you move your hips to easily ride on his cock. Your pussy clenching up around his length was sending him over the edge. You were so tight. So wet. His balls are completely saturated in your creamy juices.
You feel his length twitch against your walls. Just a few more pumps of his cock and he's spilling his load for the third time. Eddie cums so deep and hard inside of you he forgets how to breathe for a moment.
His toes curling and eyes go crossed. His mouth hanging wide open. He shoots a hand up to press against the headboard, bracing himself. You're relentless on top of him. Bouncing on his cock the bed is smacking the wall with so much force.
"Fuking christ." He grunts, his head digging back into the pillow. His back arching. You don't stop bouncing up and down on him like a bunny until you've milked him dry. His cock growing more in pain by the minute.
"C-cant cum again" Eddie pleaded. His cock hurt and it was now unbearable. Not like how it felt before when the pain was enjoyable. He can feel himself, getting close again.
Eddie just can't do it. He wants to, but he can't. He wants to fill you up with his cum again. He wants to make a mess of you the same way you did for him. Unfortunately his cock is too worn out and and sensitive to give you another.
You listened and halted.
"No more." He breathed.
"Want me to stop this time?"
Eddie nodded, squeezing his eyes shut. Regretfully, he had to stop. He's drained in more ways than one.
His face all the way to his neck is beet red. If his chest wasn't covered in tattoos, you'd guess he was that color all over.
He lets out a shuddered breath, running a hand in his hair. You take the opportunity to carefully remove him from inside you. Wincing a little at the sudden loss. His cum dripping out of your pussy and down your trembling legs a little getting on him as well. Eddie is quivering beneath you. There is a trail of his cum left behind on his abdomen and chest from his previous orgasm.
You laid back down next to where he was. His cock sore and tired from the abuse you just gave it. You and Eddie lay there not speaking for a while. The only sounds are low hums coming from the A/C. Your breathing evening out.
"Ya okay?" You asked softly, breaking the silence.
"Yeah, I...I feel fan-fuckin-tastic, actually." Eddie laughed, recalling what just happened.
"Well, I should probably get ready to go now." You announce trying to hide the sadness in your voice.
"You're not gonna stay a little longer?" He moves to sit up.
"D-did you want me to stay?" You eyed him curiously.
"....well, yeah." His voice now very horse from grunting for so long. He shifts to look you in the eyes. Letting you know he's serious.
"You can sleep here if you want and leave in the morning. Check out isn't until 11:am."
"Oh okay..I'll stay." You smiled over to him.
"Cool! Hey, did you want to hear this new song I'm working on?" Eddie exclaimed, trying to stand on his wobbly legs.
He carefully walks over to his guitar, still completely naked, and his hair disheveled.
"Is that even a question?" You pick up his discarded grungy t-shirt throwing it over your head. You never realized how cold his room felt until now.
For the rest of the night, Eddie spent the majority of the time playing you little snippets of songs he's been writing. He'd ask you for honest feedback, which you gave.
"Ya know, I'm definitely gonna be writing a song about you." He stated, strumming lazily on his guitar.
Your eyes widened as you laughed at what you thought was a joke." You're serious?"
"As a heart attack." Eddie smiled before getting off the couch, tackling you back on the bed and attacking your neck. Having you both giggling like maniacs.
After this night, you became a legend in your own right. You swore you'd never tell a soul about this, but It didn't take long after the song was officially released for everyone to put two and together. Eddie kept his word about writing a song after you. He didn't mention you were his first, but that's okay. That can be your little secret together. The best kept secret.
Corroded Coffin would go off to win two grammys and headline stadium tours. You went to see them when they came into town, and Eddie gave you the VIP treatment. You promised yourself you wouldn't catch feelings. That was hard to do when he would serenade you in his hotel room.
Eddie was too charming and caring to avoid any of that. You knew better, and you curse yourself for even going against your own set of rules. You were sure Eddie didn't feel the same. He just had a special bond with you after you took his virginity. He definitely didn't possess any true feelings for you besides admiration and friendship. Or did he? Only time will tell.
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dazed-pine · 6 months
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ー jade, azul, and floyd react to you joining the waitstaff at mostro lounge
content: gn!insert + headcanons - can be read as platonic or romantic (or frenemy like) ask box (rq box) more under the cut!!!
ー Jade Leech :
Jade doesn't recall you "wronging" him, his brother, or their Housewarden. In fact, he's going through all of the interactions you've ever had with him... trying to think why you would join the waitstaff.
When you reveal that you just need money for school funds, he stares at you with a bit of shock. Hardly anyone comes to the lounge and asks for a job. Though... he doesn't mind the forwardness from you.
It's refreshing to receive a straightforward answer actually.
However, he gives you a smile and nods: "Money? I suppose we can form... a small contract. Nothing our Housewarden would give. Just an agreement form."
Basically; job interview, mild paperwork, then training.
Jade personally trains you, he takes you right under his wing and teaches you everything you need to know about waiting on people, making drinks, and even making bigger sales for the lounge.
Jade believes you're most talented at being a host. He enjoys your smile and the small talk you make with the customers. Even when you bring the guest their waters, Jade knows he trained you well.
When he's on the clock, you're usually the host. Seating people, getting waters... all of that. Jade will give you the occasional stare, trying to figure out how much of a panic or relaxed mode you're in.
When you're doing very well, he gives you a wink... signaling that a big tip from him is coming your way.
Working with Jade? It's smooth sailing for you.
ー Azul Ashengrotto :
When Jade first told Azul that he hired you for your claim of "money". He actually laughed at first, but then he quickly realized that Jade wasn't laughing... so this is serious.
Azul is intrigued by you being so forward with this, he admires it actually! On your second day on the job, he pays you a personal visit.
He takes you to one of the farther tables in the lounge and has a quick chat with you.
"For the money? Truly? (y/n) you never cease to amaze me. I would love to learn more about what goes on in that other worldly head of yours..." Azul almost has a wicked grin.
He assures you, that this 'contract' is just a normal work contract, however if you do not give in your two weeks before you quit? It won't end pretty.
Azul comes by the lounge to check up on you a lot, making sure your work is up to his standards... and of course it is! You're being personally trained by Jade. His expectations are always met through you.
He enjoys your hard work, he's even generous enough to give you a raise on your paycheck. Which was surprising for even Jade.
Azul believes you work best as one of the baristas'/bartenders.
When he comes in, he always enjoys a cup of your coffee. Jade's coffee is always his #1 pick, but he also enjoys the flavor of your's.
Every time you make him a drink, he always leaves you a tip. Which you're quick to learn... he doesn't do that too often.
ー Floyd Leech :
Floyd wasn't present during your week of training, Jade said he was busy with his own affairs... that's why Jade was the sole person training you (blessing in disguise... more likely than you think!)
When he saw you waiting on a table, he went right to Jade and asked what you were doing here. Jade was happy to tell him that they got another worker!
Floyd is excited to hear that, and it's also you! Floyd always loves teasing you between classes, or even enjoying the small malicious chats with you.
He chats you up a lot on the job, constantly talking to you about how the job can suck, be great, or violent.
Floyd's stories about throwing out rude guests always makes you laugh hard. It doesn't matter if you have a table, you always enjoy a good laugh from him.
Overtime, Floyd shows up to work more when he's schedule to work with you. He know he can lean on you a lot when you're on the clock with him!
He believes you excel most as a waiter. Maybe it's because he slacks off, or he just enjoys the company with you.
Floyd loves how he can gossip about the customers with you. For once, he's not playing too many 'pranks' or teasing you as much.
You just pray he doesn't get bored of you, he might actually pull something... horrible during work.
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rachelzeglertruther · 8 months
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Why You're Wrong About Rachel Zegler
This is a long post, but there's a lot of context missing from the Rachel Zegler "discourse" that I thought I could add with my history of watching this unfold from the beginning.
The Snow White Thing
You probably know this part. There's a curated video of Rachel going viral, framed to make her seem like she's never seen Snow White, she hates the story, she hates the character, she's ungrateful, and single-handedly ruined Disney's brand. The clips from these videos are not new— they were released nearly a year ago in September 2022 and nobody cared about them at the time. Why? Because all the full interviews she did that day at the Disney Exo in 2022 showed a young, charming woman who was excited and proud to be cast in an iconic role. The interviews were very well received and it was a non story. Now that it's been edited down and cut together in a malicious way, and the people sharing them are purposefully misquoting her, they've twisted the context. Normally, this would be a non controversy. Even if that video wasn't taken out of context and spliced together to make her seem like she hates the film, most people wouldn't care. The issue is the response to the video.
Let's get this out of the way: Rachel Zegler doesn't hate Snow White. She relayed that she was afraid of the forest scene as a child and didn't revisit it again until after she was cast in the role. She has since then watched it several times and has expressed for YEARS before that interview came out that she was incredibly honored and grateful to be playing such an iconic Disney princess. If you watch the full videos that those clips came from, this comes across immediately to anyone with their own mind. If you hate someone for being scared of something as a child, I don't know what to tell you. If the role was being given to the biggest Snow White fan, you would be correct that she doesn't deserve it. Unfortunately for you, this role requires talent and Rachel has the Golden Globe and critical acclaim from people who matter within the industry (her peers and critics).
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You know who does hate their beloved characters in beloved franchises but the general public still applauds them? Harrison Ford, Sean Connery, Daniel Craig, and Robert Pattinson. They've all expressed outright contempt for the roles and the films they were part of, but nobody cared. People had fun with their quotes but they still respected them. Rachel said nothing even closely resembling their remarks, but she's being torn to shreds. Are we seeing a pattern here?
Rachel never said a single bad thing about the character or the animated film— she said that it was outdated and that set people over the edge, foaming at the mouth to have her burned at the stake. If you think it would be perfectly fine to have a movie about an abused 14 year old girl run away to play housemaid for a bunch of men, get kissed in her sleep/death by an adult man, and then wake up to fall into his arms in 2024, that's certainly a hot take. If you're against remakes, direct your ire at Disney. But if you truly think that plot would work with young girls today, you're the one who's out of touch. It would do far more harm than good to portray a young woman in that light.
She also never said that there was anything wrong with romance or love. She said that the new Snow White wasn't only dreaming of that. I can't stress enough that this wasn't her decision… she was describing the plot of the new film that was written by Greta Gerwig and approved by Disney. There's a prince in the film and he will also have a more developed personality and storyline. If you have a problem with the writing, wait until it comes out so you can write your strongly worded letter to Greta. If you have a problem with the concept in general, take it up with Disney. There's no need for you to be defensive over hurting the legacy of a multi-billion dollar company or a 87 year old cartoon written by a proud racist antisemite. This is the most confusing part of the hate campaign to me because it wasn't even her opinion— she was literally describing the plot of the film she had nothing to do with. It also isn't a new thing. Disney actors have been promoting their newer films this way for years.
It's perfectly okay to like things that are problematic. It's becoming an issue that we refuse to acknowledge that maybe some things we love are harmful. What we can't do is justify why it's not problematic, and in fact everyone who calls it out is the problem and NOT their precious cartoon. The 1937 Snow White was an amazing feat of animation. It's a classic for a reason. But it was also Hitler's favorite film and was directed by a white supremacist (the one who is "rolling in his grave" due to Rachel's existence, according to his son). Things don't exist in a vacuum and we can't ignore the bad parts.
How We Got Here:
The thing that everyone is missing is the source of this campaign. This started in September of 2020 when transphobic actor Gina Carano made fun of trans people by changing her pronouns to beep/bop.boop. Rachel indirectly called her out by coming to the defense of the trans community.
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She never called out Gina by name (though she rightfully could have). Mind you, Rachel's first film hadn't come out yet. Nobody knew who she was outside of those of us who were anticipating West Side Story and were fans of her covers on YouTube. She was a "nobody" in the industry. Take this part with a grain of salt because I can't confirm it, but Gina and her fans directly blame Rachel for her being banned from Twitter. Again, I really don't think that matters as she's harmful to the trans community and shouldn't have a platform. What does matter is that fans of Gina (which, let's be real, are just fans of transphobia) have been stalking Rachel's every move since then. Unfortunately for them, there wasn't much they could use against her other than to call her woke and #snowbrown when she was cast a year later as the Disney princess. The noise has always been there, but unless you were a fan of hers, you probably didn't hear about it. It wasn't until two years after this that they had something else against her.
If you've recently seen a video of Rachel crying circulating that claims to be her reaction to the recent Snow White backlash, it's an old video. It's from a vlog from her youtube channel posted in June 2022. It was in response to these exact same transphobic anti-woke conservatives who thought that they had something when she did an interview on the red carpet of the Shazam premiere. When asked why she joined the DC universe, she responded "I needed a job." It was generally well received by most people who thought it was cute and funny, but those who were waiting in the shadows latched onto it as an excuse to send her death threats.
The video was also about a month after she was invited to present at the 2022 Oscars and was made to seem like she bullied the Academy (as a no name newcomer, mind you) into letting her attend. In reality, a fan left a comment on her Instagram asking what she was wearing to the event. She responded that she wasn't invited but would be rooting for everyone from her couch in her boyfriend's pajamas. It was the public who demanded she get an invite and the Oscar's must have agreed that it was very odd that the lead actress of a film that was nominated for Best Film wouldn't get an invite. Whether it was an oversight on their part or a scheduling issue with Rachel's filming, I truly think there was no malicious intent from either party. Keep in mind, she used to be very active with her fans (she's a huge fangirl of things herself and has always had a strong relationship with her fans) and she wasn't used to her comments becoming articles and national tv segments. This was the first time it happened to her. It appears she learned that she's not just a girl who posts on YouTube anymore and she's going to be put under a microscope for every move she makes. She has since shut down her Instagram comments and rarely interacts with fans outside of liking comments these days because of this.
I know this is long, but I need people to understand where this is all coming from. It didn't just happen out of nowhere. It's an orchestrated campaign built by violent conservatives, and thousands of women who saw Barbie this summer are hopping on the bandwagon to beat another woman into submission because they have a lot of internalized misogyny to deal with. She's not smug, you just hate women. It's okay to find people annoying, but it's valuable to look into why you think that. If you see a confident young woman expressing views that don't actually harm anyone and you think she needs to be "humbled" and "put in her place" by the entire internet dogpiling her, you've lost your mind. Using "body language experts" (fake job) to diagnose her as a psychopath is so vile. Everytime someone mentions her name online, the comments beneath it are full of the most violent, misogynistic, racist things I've ever seen. If you're contributing to that, you've chosen your side. Reevaluate or seek help.
I'm tired of seeing this happen to young women. We let this happen to Jennifer Lawrence, Brie Larson, Millie Bobby Brown, Halle Bailey, and Jenna Ortega. It's one thing to call out celebrities and hold them accountable when they're doing something actively harmful, but that's not what this is about. That's never been what this is about. We pick these girls to pieces and examine them and pull them apart to justify our hatred of young women who rise to success too quickly for our liking. We dogpile and try to stamp out the flame before they burn too bright. Barbie is still in theaters and you all loved it, yet you're demanding that a bright girl with a big future be small and submissive and humbled because you have issues. That's not feminism. You're just the girls who would have bullied Weird Barbie for using her hands too much when she talks.
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silentcryracha · 11 months
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❍ ‗ Taking care of you during your period x hyung line (skz) ‗ ❍
.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.
Pairings : Chan x reader, Minho x reader, Changbin x reader, Hyunjin x reader
Genre/warnings : reader has periods, breasts are mentioned, mention of painkillers/mood swings/blood (yk), nothing else just fluff and really sweet boys
Summary : Like the title says, the oldest boys take care of you when you have your period. You are their s/o in this. Half headcanon and half scenarios.
Word count : 1.5 k
A/n : I'm currently on the FLOOR trying to get through this so I just, indulged myself I guess lmao! I hope it'll be an enjoyable read and also if any of y'all is also suffering now, good luck babes we got this <3
ps: There could be grammar errors, my first language isn't english!
.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.
Chan ‗ ❍
First of all, he wouldn't be weirded out or immature about it at all, he grew up with women in his family so he wouldn't be completely oblivious. Second thing, he seems to be natually very nurturing and attentive, so you know for sure that you'd be well taken care of, more than usual.
Depending on how this time of the month would be for you, he'd act accordingly. For example, if you are usually on time or late, if you tend to suffer more or less. In general he'd probably remember the days/week and always make sure to have a little bit of every essential thing at home beforehand. Sanitary products, painkillers, snacks, comfort food; you name it, he got it. Wether you lived together or not, doesn't matter.
In the best case scenario you'd just be having a shitty day and he would make sure to spend time with you (full day if he's not working, and even then he'd check on you multiple times), taking care of you, cuddling and probably babying you more than you need. And you'd let him of course, even just to show him you appreciated him caring for you. He would be really attentive but... chill at the same time. He just wants you to be comfortable, not further stress you out.
On the other hand, if you were someone who usually hurt a lot or maybe had some issues related to your condition, then he would be more clingy. If hugs and cuddles were an actual solution you'd be CURED.
He hated seeing you in pain regardless, but if the pain in question was out of the norm/more severe he would absolutely be in the worst mood. Again, every supply possible would to be 100% ready at the right times, and you truly wouldn't be allowed to lift a finger.
"Channie, baby, I've been handling this stuff since forever, I'll be fine, okay?" and then he'd frown and pout like "But I want to take care of my baby, that's the least I can do". Of course you wouldn't be able to refuse him even if you wanted to, so you'd just end up accepting the help making sure to thank him all the time to let him know how grateful you were for him. <3
Minho ‗ ❍
Minho just kind of learned along the way how to take care of you at the best of his abilities. Something that seems to be very important to him is health, and you having your period to him it's almost like a seasonal cold. Something that just kind of happens? He would learn which foods or beverages help the pain/body, or the things that would make you feel better, but he'd be kinda random about it? lol.
"You know what? I really feel like eating some good meat for dinner" and he'd pull some shit like "Actually, I was thinking of salmon for tonight. You know, it would be very good for you now", Not gonna lie you would be lowkey impressed that he bothered to search up stuff like that in the first place. He wouldn't be pushy though, he couldn't deny you even if he tried. Want a specific dinner/dessert? It's yours. You want to watch a movie and cuddle? Done. Or do you just want to sleep and hug? Good enough for him. He just really wants you to have a calm and comfortable day.
This being handled as a health matter would also mean that he'd probably be quite precise with keeping track of the days/week. If being irregular wasn't a usual thing for you, one day late and he'd be asking questions lol.
"How are you feeling?" "Do you need anything from the store?" "Need any help?" and so on. Especially if we were talking about a person with more severe pain/issues.
At this point he would be a little more insistent with the whole "take care of yourself right" but only out of worry and you knew it. "I made some ginger tea for you" "But-" and you wouldn't be able to finish the sentence without him raising one eyebrow like 'I dare you'. Two minutes after the cup was EMPTY. You'd also get belly rubs with warm hands afterwards so it's okay :')
Minho would never miss to make you feel loved and taken care of, it's like he needs you to know that you can count on him whenever you need.
Changbin ‗ ❍
Changbin also grew up with a sister but I feel like he was the baby of the family so I think he'd try to replicate that more than anything. His s/o would be treated like royalty regardless, don't get me wrong, but during this time I feel like he'd feel bad for you and the fact that he can't really help, and would try to 'fix it' by indulging you a lot.
He probably wouln't keep track of the days/week, just in general. But, I think that he'd realize it quickly when you start acting a little off or being fatigued, and at that point he'd piece it together quickly and offer his help if he can. And if he can't, then he'll just settle with random gifts that could cheer you up. It could be something cute like a plushie, a treat like your favorite sweets, or something more unique like an expensive gift. You don't want him to spend such money on you, but you lowkey know that's his love language and appreciate it ten times more for it. He would also remind you of it "Shh, you know I love to spoil my princess", that would make you melt and he knows it well.
In a more severe case I think that he would make sure to not let you lift a finger. Dinner? Dishes? Medicines? Cuddles? Tissues for a particularly off moment? The remote being an inch too far? HE'S GOT IT. Changbin would also probably try to be there for you physically during this time and would get annoyed when he can't manage. At that point expect multiple calls and texts throught the day and maybe even a few cute selfies too that would never fail to make you smile and lift your mood.
If you happened to be crying, he would try to handle himself but just wouldn't be able to do it so you'd probably have a nice liberating ugly cry session together and then fall asleep hugged comfortably :(
He would also make sure that you're comfortable wherever you are, and that usually means completely laying on him, the best pillow in the house.
Hyunjin ‗ ❍
Hyunjin is shy and an empath, we know. I feel like at the beginning of your relationship he could be a little uncomfortable handling this situation, mainly because he'd like to help in some way but would be unsure of how to ask. You would also probably try to hide it or not mention it, you know like in early stages of any relationship, but out of shyness more than anything. You know he's a very sweet guy and he would probably feel bad that you feel bad. And he does.
One day during movie night you'd probably unintentionally flinch or hiss at the pain and then he'd decide that he had ENOUGH and would blurt out a "Can I do anything for you?". You'd be kind of taken aback but appreciate it a lot. You would give in "Yes actually" you wouldn't have to say it twice before he's back with what you asked for.
From that moment on I feel like it would be a process for him to learn how to know you and your needs and after a while he would just...do it. Which were your habits or comfort foods, your preferred type of sanitary products to use, what could make you uncomfortable and so on.
I feel like he wouldn't necessarily intentionally keep track of it but would randomly look at the date and go "Mhh, isn't this that time of the month?" and you'd probably show up with a belly ache and an extreme need of hugs so yeah he'd be like "I figured" and kind of laugh at you being cute.
You'd probably have something silly like a "Cursed week" playlist to cry to or a specific list of things to watch that would absolutely wreck you emotionally because why not. And you'd plan it together and go back to them like a routine. You probably have a very sad or angsty tv show/drama that you go back to once a month just to either cry your eyes out or comment together like two bitter old ladies. And you have a blast.
Hyunjin would try to be lowkey about it though. Once he learned how to properly take care of you he would just do things and not be obnoxious about it. Like he would be they type to leave a sticky note for you before leaving for work that said "Good morning my love. Remember to take it easy and take some medicine if you need, I love you <3"
In general I think that he would be the type to try and distract you as much as possible, wether it was with some nice cuddles to warm you up or even tease you to make you laugh. He could be out of pocket sometimes but that's exactly what makes it hilarious.
.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.
This is it for the hyung line! Maknae line link. Hope you enjoyed my silly writing, feel free to leave feebacks if you feel like it :')
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ataraxiaspainting · 3 months
Text
Chrollo Lucilfer Yandere Analysis.
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Yan Chrollo x F Reader.
Warnings: Yandere themes, kidnapping, not SFW (both non-con and dub-con), the reader is described as AFAB and uses she/her pronouns respectfully, forced tattooing, Chrollo having a god complex but that's nothing new lol, Stockholm Syndrome, stalking, parallels to religion (mainly Judeo-Christianity), implied body transformation (using Chrollo’s book), masturbation, manipulation, and violence/gore.
Word Count: 13k.
credits to @ddarker-dreams for the yandere MBTI and like everything she writes for this creepy greaseball (check her out if you haven’t already!!) <33333
another thanks to @depravitycentral for the inspiration! check them out too!!!! their general profile and nsfw profile for mr. chrollo specifically BUT everything they write is pretty good! <33333
one last thanks to @phasmophobia-territory for the ultimate yandere types list and @blughxreader for the yandere personality meme. both have inspired the unique qualities part of this analysis, so please be sure to check them out! <333
also, for quotes i tried to do something like genshin impact/honkai: star rail voicelines so i apologize if they aren’t good (メ﹏メ)
*~*~*~*
I look forward to living life with you from here on out. However, just know that there will be many different roads we will walk together on. Their lengths will depend on you, for better or for worse. As time goes on, however, I know that they will all end eventually.
→ Introduction.
The very definition of an empty shell, Chrollo has had his humanity stripped of him from a very young age. The only people who have ever made him feel something are all members of the Troupe or are buried underground, burning in hell or soaring above the clouds as angels, either one a much better existence than the life they all spent in Meteor City. So, when he sees you, someone who has been able to make him feel something without interacting with him at all, without the use of Nen, without even brushing your shoulder against him while running to your train in a hurry, he does not know what to do.
He feels like he is back to being a small child, roaming the streets and looking through dumpsters for anything of value trying to ignore the pain of the cuts and infections all over his body. You bring up a feeling he has not felt in years; fear. Despite this situation being far, far different from those times, his brain thinks otherwise. It sends him a fight or flight response every time he sees you, as much as he hides it, much like he hides himself among the crowds and crowds of people as he follows you home. You have resurrected a beast thought to be long dead, something innate, animal, almost carnal, without even lifting a finger.
Is this who he is, he wonders? He finally feels something, for once, a sense of belonging and identity and… humanity.
It fills him with a sense of euphoria, while you view it with dread every time his Zetsu slips for just a moment. You always look over your shoulder during those times and start walking faster, but definitely not enough to deter him, and it will never be enough.
→ Darling Character Analysis.
Creative.
Chrollo has a deep curiosity about the world and appreciates a darling who shares this thirst for knowledge and intellectual growth. The form of expression doesn't matter to him, whether it's through writing, music, or eloquent speech. What truly matters to Chrollo is that his darling can communicate uniquely and authentically.
In a concerning manner, Chrollo imitates his darling’s behaviors to an extreme degree, devouring everything they do with an insatiable appetite. It doesn't matter how his darling presents their interests to him, whether it's straightforward or not. For instance, if his darling mentions their love for playing the violin after spending days alone with only Chrollo for company, the next day a brand new violin will mysteriously appear on the table beside their side of the bed. Chrollo will secretly learn to play the violin himself, the one he purchased as well as the one he gifted to his darling, practicing when they are not paying attention or are fast asleep.
As a result, his darling may find themselves obligated to reciprocate this behavior by learning Chrollo's favorite musical pieces.
He will experience immense joy, perhaps so much that he will hold them down on the bed and shower their face with kisses while they squirm and kick. Even when they eventually stop, he will continue, disregarding their pleas for him to stop.
As always, his strength is overpowering, leaving you with no action to do other than to say no.
At least there is some form of care after it is all over and done with, although it always somehow involves blending with whatever activity preceded it. For instance, if it was playing the violin, he would play you with both your favorite pieces on the gramophone he put near the bathtub while giving you a massage and preparing a relaxing bath for both of you.
It is painful, more so than the usual ache between your legs, because he pays attention to your desires and exploits them, even when he appears to be gentle. The pain lingers, no matter how hard you try to disconnect from everything happening around you.
He gives you everything you want, and it hurts because you always know why.
Bold.
A darling who never hides their intentions and just goes for it would spark some sort of admiration in Chrollo, especially if they use their boldness on him as a manipulation tactic.
He finds it entertaining most of all, but also there is a small part of him that is grateful for it because it makes his darling seem more human to him and not just something to own.
Boldness is quite a human trait, one that he so adores, especially with those he holds close like fellow members of the Troupe. It is also quite a trait that can easily be manipulated.
If you attempt to flirt to lower his guard, he will flirt back twice as hard. 
When everything is over and done with, he will admit he knows exactly what you are doing as he kisses you again, you not kissing him back this time, as good as your acting was, much to your horror.
Resourceful.
Chrollo sees himself above the rest of man, a God in his way, so a darling who is quite similar to him he would adore.
That is not to say he could not fall for someone the complete opposite of him, someone who is impulsive and wears their heart on their sleeve and everything else he does not and cannot do, but the probability is low compared to a darling that plans everything and keeps their cards close, much as he does.
That makes escape attempts though, quite common, considering how resourceful his darling can be, like using a file to saw the metal in one of his safes or the iron on their leg keeping them in his penthouse. But he loves it, it is one of his favorite things about them.
It is endless entertainment to him, a sort of fight against himself, albeit he is much, much stronger when it comes to wits most likely. You can think on your feet as much as you want, but so will he.
He will mirror their actions until the end.
Independent.
Much like his beloved's cleverness, he derives amusement from their self-reliance. He takes pleasure in dismantling their barriers bit by bit until they have no choice but to rely on him completely.
Indeed, Chrollo views his beloved as simultaneously superior and inferior to him.
There is no equality between them, only a shifting power dynamic that his beloved will soon discover. They will never be certain if his actions, like retrieving their favorite snack from the top shelf of the pantry, are expressions of love or gestures of mockery.
At times, it may be both. At times, it may be neither.
His thoughts remain inscrutable, and he revels in it.
Cunning.
Chrollo loves it when your eyebrows furrow, when you’re deep in focus, especially when you are trying to come up with an escape plan and not noticing him right behind you, because of that expression on your face.
It’s unholy, the way he worships you with sacrifices both living and not. He wants to ruin you, yet keep you as you are. So, after a long time of pondering, he concludes. He will remake your shape, not enough to completely alter it, but just enough for your walls to tumble down and let him in. That is why while he will let you try and try again to escape, he will still attempt to get into your head. He is like a poison, a parasite, imprisoning you in your fears, insecurities, and plans that are doomed to fail sooner or later. It is what he wants to be, but he also wants to be more. 
More and more he will be, and more and more he will take from you. It is only natural to want more than what is given, correct? 
It is how Chrollo and the other Troupe members survived so long in Meteor City. They take and take, not caring who they hurt because it is human instinct to want and seize. He will argue as such whenever you try to guilt him because you will soon know that he holds no shame in whatever he does. He is selfish, and he wants to stay that way. He wants you to do the same, so he loves it when you fight him or try to run away because he knows it is only nature. Nature will run its course regardless of who wants it to not. Nature does not care, so why should he? Why should you?
But he also wants you to not be as selfish as him, despite him knowing that it most likely will not be unless you are broken down enough. But that is fine, Chrollo tells himself because that time will eventually arise.
Mature.
Maturity is an elusive quality that characterizes Chrollo, yet eludes him as well. It ebbs and flows like a breeze, carrying seeds to unknown destinations, beyond the perception of onlookers. Unfortunately, you, the observer, are an unwilling participant in the multitude of games he plays and the various disguises he dons. Occasionally, Chrollo can act impulsively, adopting yet another facade acquired from others in the interludes of his life. However, there are moments when he patiently waits for the opportune time to strike, akin to a cunning serpent. But this outcome relies on your level of vigilance or innocence. Perhaps, one day, you'll find it best to surrender to his will. Chrollo eagerly anticipates that day.
Hardworking.
Chrollo feels a mix of jealousy and a desire for control when he sees someone truly dedicated to their pursuits. He wants to replicate their passion and adopt a similar persona. At the same time, he is intrigued by their determination and ambition, as he wants to understand every aspect of their character. This admiration creates a thrilling challenge for him, as he seeks to imitate their drive while also appreciating it. He wants to both admire and exploit this trait to engage in a game of cat and mouse until they submit. Perhaps it would be good to do just that, to prevent yourself from getting hurt again.
Observant.
Chrollo finds great pleasure in the thrill of the hunt, especially when his keen-eyed darling begins to notice subtle indications of being watched. These signs, carefully planted by Chrollo himself, make his darling increasingly cautious. For Chrollo, taking risks brings great rewards. Although these signs are intentional, they still hold, don't they? A lingering footstep behind them. A faint smile on a stranger's face, an unfamiliar figure lurking in an alley near his companion's residence. These signals confirm that they are being stalked, and Chrollo is entertained by the fact that their sharp instincts assure them that this is no mere coincidence or misunderstanding.
Logical.
Chrollo's beloved should possess some semblance of logic, even if it deviates from conventional understanding. The key lies in their thought process, rather than adherence to reason. This cognitive approach, be it driven by emotions or rationality, captivates Chrollo. They meticulously evaluate facts, evidence, and outcomes, exercising caution in moments of perceived advantage, as well as during bouts of insecurity and danger, where they must think quickly on their feet. This mental calculus can either serve them well or inadvertently lead to their downfall. They carefully weigh the pros and cons, thus fueling Chrollo's insatiable desire for the fun of the chase, which hinges upon ultimately catching his beloved in the act.
A Leader.
If you hold a position of leadership, whether at work or among friends, this situation will be even more perplexing and distressing for you. In an instant, you were no longer in charge, forcibly removed from your familiar surroundings and confined. Your authority, influence, and status, which held great significance, have been stripped away. You may experience a profound sense of helplessness and powerlessness as if all your hard work has been unjustly taken from you. Chrollo, as your captor, will seek to exert even more control over you if you possess the characteristic of leadership. He finds it ironic that you are now compelled to follow him, forever robbed of the opportunity to lead while you remain in captivity.
Confident Outside, Insecure Inside.
Chrollo takes great pleasure in this particular attribute, as a mere few words, be they soothing or otherwise, have the power to manipulate you effortlessly.
You find yourself compelled to dance and sing, controlled by invisible strings or some intangible force, as there seems to be no other recourse in this predicament. After enduring prolonged isolation, you will unquestioningly revere Chrollo's words, no matter how distorted they may be, treating them as a testament to be praised. And Chrollo eagerly anticipates the arrival of that day.
It instills fear in you, as both of you are aware that such a day will inevitably arrive.
With a few choice words, Chrollo can elicit tears or smiles from you, a feat that few others have managed to accomplish.
You despise it, while Chrollo utterly loves it. Intelligent.
Intelligence encompasses a wide range of abilities, making it possible for Chrollo to be drawn to various types. However, what truly captivates him is a darling who possesses either linguistic or interpersonal intelligence, or even better, both. He desires someone who can effortlessly decipher people's intentions, using words that ignite a fire within him, even if those words are aimed at him or others.
The type or types of intelligence his darling possesses greatly influences their relationship. How he presents himself in public, whether as a kind gentleman or someone who keeps his distance, depends on their emotional intelligence and intuition. Additionally, Chrollo finds it incredibly appealing when his darling shares a specific interest that is completely new to him. This not only allows him to learn something new but also adds another mask to his ever-expanding collection.
Someone who is emotionally intelligent, like his beloved, would pose a challenge for him to manipulate. They possess the ability to understand him better than most, making it all the more satisfying for Chrollo when they succumb to his desires. After all, as Chrollo often says, the greater the risk, the greater the reward.
→ Yandere MBTI: CAMS. (Cruel, Aware, Manipulative, Strict)
Chrollo possesses great skill in dismantling individuals but lacks the necessary expertise to reconstruct them according to his vision. Unfortunately, you have become an unwilling participant in his experiments. Share with him your deepest anguish and vulnerabilities. Chrollo also portrays himself as a universal remedy, claiming that he holds the power to alleviate all your suffering and resolve your troubles, provided you heed his advice.
However, he waits until he has captured you, and your defenses have crumbled. In that moment of vulnerability, when you are cut off from the world, consumed by sorrow, unable to eat or speak, he reveals himself as a deity. He extends his hand to you, leading you along a path he meticulously constructed. This path is filled with suffering, a never-ending cycle of waiting for both of you. But at the end of this dark tunnel lies Chrollo's ultimate desire: your affection.
What is your ultimate pain, what is your ultimate wish? I can provide anything and everything for you, beloved if you do not stray away from the light.
If you happen to encounter him in public before he abducts you, it is because he willingly allows you to do so, aiming to create a favorable impression that will prevent you from suspecting his true intentions. However, if you do find yourself growing suspicious, it is not without justification. Nevertheless, he will persist in attempting to dispel your doubts by showering you with more gifts and displaying gentlemanly behavior such as pulling out your chair and kissing your hand or inner wrist. Yet, everything appears excessively flawless, to the extent of inducing nausea. Everything is so… flawless all of the time, but only when you are around him and him alone. Ironically, despite Chrollo's desire to dissuade your wariness towards him, his tender and kind gestures only evoke fear.
Chrollo effortlessly switches between portraying himself as a divine figure and a malevolent force, adapting to the circumstances at hand. On one hand, he displays an uncanny perfection, never making a mistake and seemingly possessing an understanding of your thoughts and emotions even before you do. On the other hand, he reveals his true nature as pure evil by casually initiating a bet to see who can consume the most alcohol, leaving you as an unwilling participant in this game of his. As soon as you become intoxicated, he unveils himself as the embodiment of wickedness, groaning as your clothes rip off and you cry his mouth is on yours and he keeps murmuring things into your ear that are so much more terrifying than sweet and-
Panaceas are eternal, refusing to fade away, regardless of your preferences. And so is this situation with me, my dearest.
Chrollo often repeats the phrase that he would sacrifice his life for you. However, there is doubt as to whether he truly means it. His actions, whether they be subtle or overt, inflict daily harm upon you, both mentally and physically. He disguises his hurtful behavior as casual conversation, a serious one, and everything in between. Chrollo's self-centered nature raises the question of why he would make such a claim.
You remain unaware of his true intentions, as Chrollo holds the knowledge of what is genuine and what is fabricated close to his chest. He perpetuates this ambiguity, ensuring that you will never uncover the truth. Once again, Chrollo finds himself in a position of guilt, but the specific charges remain unknown. As an impartial judge, you can't discern between deceit and honesty when you have never been taught the difference. Chrollo, determined to maintain this state of uncertainty, ensures that the truth remains elusive, no matter what lengths he has to go to to make sure it stays that way.
Chrollo possesses the ability to assume various roles. He can portray himself as a reliable partner rather than a deceitful captor, a compassionate individual rather than a mass murderer, a savior rather than someone in need of rescue... The possibilities are endless. This charade is not merely a game to him, but a necessity to maintain his façade. Even if he desired to, he could never remove these disguises, as he is oblivious to his true identity, because who is he without his lies? Nothing? It is a sorrowful predicament for both me and him, you will think someday, one that may prompt you to ponder whether it is Stockholm Syndrome or your inherent empathy for others.
At some point, you will allow him to take what he desires, whether it be when he reaches a breaking point and loses control, or when you become desperate for any form of human interaction.
Whenever you are in need, call out my name. I will be there to provide whatever cure you desire for the ailment at hand.
→ Unique Qualities.
Yandere Type: 
Possessive.
Chrollo in one word would be selfish, and he himself would not deny that it suits him quite well.
Whatever he touches turns to gold in the most metaphorical sense. Whenever he sees something he wants, he will take it. Everything Chrollo takes either has rhyme and reason to it or none at all. He turns them into gold as a sign of who owns them. Even if you have fallen or will eventually fall prey to this touch. The golden touch immobilizes you so you never ever leave him. 
Like King Midas, he is selfish, and he takes pride in it. He is never humble in anything he does. That much is certain. He holds you in his arms at night like he knows your weight in gold, that he could never lose you as he lost himself all those years ago. His kisses are gentle when he wants them to be, or they can be as aggressive as he wants them to be. You’ll come to learn that it does not matter what you want, what matters is what Chrollo wants. Does not having a say in your hell hurt? Or does not having a choice help you justify to yourself that you must escape this?
Monitoring. (Watches From Afar / Direct Contact)
Really, it is Shalnark that does most of the work here, but it is still worth mentioning, especially since what Chrollo cannot get through traditional stalking alone, he asks a very teasing Shalnark to get for him. Though, if Shalnark fails, Feitan is put to the task, much to Feitan’s quite less than subtle annoyance, not that he would ever voice it. Through this trio, the work is separated into three strategies.
Chrollo’s way of finding information is as classic as it comes. Either he is observing you go about your usual day, to that coffee shop you visit before going to work, to the library you frequent on the weekends, to a park you like walking in to see the birds and to get a change of scenery while you read, or he is inside your home, looking through drawers, sampling some leftovers even from your fridge, and making a literal list of things to buy you either later or in the present moment and things to take with him when he inevitably steals you away. Shalnark’s way comes through the internet, through placing cameras in your home and showing Chrollo the footage day in and day out, and perhaps even making an online friend of you if you are that social with other people. To him, it’s all child’s play, especially with finding family members and friends of yours for later, to perhaps ask them questions under the guise of a fellow friend of yours even. But the information that neither Shalnark nor Chrollo can get from stalking alone relies on Feitan, which is where all the finding people you know and love trickle down and puddle at the bottom of this sort of vial of differing plans. This is a last resort, sort of, because there are better things that Feitan can be doing, really, but he is nothing less than loyal to Chrollo and the other Spiders, so he’ll find people who may know the answers his boss was looking for.
He does not blame Chrollo, because if the information was something even Shalnark could not find, it is something so secretive that it could metaphorically be so beneath the waves that it is on the bottom of the ocean floor.
Feitan takes on the role of the more experienced diver because he wants to make Chrollo happy.
Thankfully for most of those you know, only a maximum of perhaps five people are flicked off before you are brought to whatever penthouse Chrollo has bought for the next month or so. The rest can continue with their lives as it was, not that Feitan cares or Shalnark cares or Chrollo cares, except for poor, poor you.
Removing Nuisances. (Murder Likelihood: 8/10)
Similarly to gathering information about you, dealing with rivals follows a similar sort of hierarchy. Chrollo follows them, albeit with far less care and perhaps even stealing a few things along the way, if the rivals are rich enough, though that is quite rare to happen. Instead, he would try to threaten them through anonymous emails or letters, perhaps even with a photo of them sleeping thrown into the mix. But if that does not work, Shalnark is up next, digging up past searches and buyings that the rival perhaps regrets or wants to remain hidden. It could be anything, really, and soon this information will start to spread like a flame until the rival’s reputation is utterly ruined. If the rival is still stubborn about wanting to be romantically involved with you, Feitan is last, burying a corpse underground that looks far from the human it once was by the end of it all, and Feitan, unsurprisingly, likes this sort of business rather than simply lying in wait for a friend of yours to unfortunately cross his path.
Perhaps even Chrollo will join Feitan in this session or sessions. It sometimes happens, when Chrollo is too pent up or feeling especially angry, although he hides it well with a smile that is a bit too wide, at this rival in particular. By the end of it, when both he and Feitan look like they took a bath in blood with their clothes on, Chrollo laughs, and Feitan snickers. He feels good, both of them do. Maybe this is why Chrollo is so taken with you, Feitan wonders. The power and control that comes with you… it’s utterly addicting, isn’t it?
Adam and Eve. (Absolute Isolation) (Kidnapping Likelihood: 10/10)
Before he takes you away, Chrollo makes sure that whatever he cannot replace he takes with him. This includes memorabilia, photos, family heirlooms if you have any, and even annotated novels you have on your bookshelf with notes sticking out of them like sore thumbs. He manages to take it all away easily, just like he does with you. Chrollo, despite how selfish he is, still wants in some capacity to make you happy. In your “adapting stage”, you may be able to hide away from him in the bathroom and lock the door, but at least you will have the choice to continue whatever hobbies you had before that Chrollo allows you to do while you are self-isolating. 
He sees this small reason for you not to hate him entirely as a win. A triumph followed by many others to come.
Collector’s Habit. (Comfortable Imprisonment / Chains + Cages)
Chrollo’s penthouse is lined with things both of significance to him and you. Almost all of it is stuff that he has stolen, however, not that he cares. The paintings lined up in the dining room, the many pretty dresses put in your closet and you are forced to wear, the jewelry that he clasps onto your neck and fingers and wrists like chains, all of them are stolen in some capacity or another. 
The things that he had stolen from your home all look like they belong there, almost. Your favorite pink beret placed next to a porcelain plate of macaroons and fruit a note telling you to get ready for a date later in the evening, an old photo of you placed in a frame that ought to be at least three hours worth of your salary, your most cherished books all lined up next to Chrollo’s own, all the covers and sizes somewhat similar to one another that it almost drives you mad. It brings Chrollo comfort, while it brings you ire. 
Possibly, you’ll read one of his Dostoevsky pieces when you think he is gone, or you’ll try on one of his many fur coats when it gets too chilly or when you are curious. But curiosity always finds a way to kill the cat, because when you think you are not going to be caught, Chrollo finds a way to sneak up behind you and simply observe, smirking, even when you see him.
Attention-Seeking.
Chrollo has always been one to utterly enjoy being in the limelight. He loves acting parts, playing parts as classy as a Prince Charming to a part as scheming as a villain that has locked the princess in a tower. You get both, the unlucky person you are. He gives you roses and proclaims poems and confessions of absolute love and undying loyalty, but you then remember that he is the one that trapped you here, to begin with.
This life that was forced upon you is a fairytale very close to cracking and falling apart, but never does.
You are forced to be a helpless maiden waiting for a knight in shining armor to rescue her, but unfortunately for you, that knight is also the very evildoer in this story. So, you try to be your own knight, your own prince, but it will never be as close or as real as an actual hero. So, your attempts fail, regardless of how long they were in the making. You are not strong enough, not fast enough, and you simply cannot write your own ending in this whimsical tale if Chrollo is always aware of them.
But you come up with a plan that takes weeks upon weeks and months upon months for it to bear fruit. 
You'll comply with his desires and make your getaway when he least anticipates it. Thus, you're compelled to dance with Chrollo, flawlessly and without objection, to safeguard your plan. However, with each movement, it feels as though nails are penetrating your foot, for you're uncertain if Chrollo is aware of your actions, and it fills you with immense fear.
But it is too late to back out of this, so you keep on doing this waltz.
Eliminating Rivals. 
The basement, as always, is filled with dust and dirt with insects both alive and dead scattered on the floor next to Feitan’s equipment. Chrollo does not mind it, though, despite him still wearing the suit he wore when he was following you to the train station, the route you usually took to get back from your best friend’s house to your place. He does not like her, but he decides to let her still do whatever with her life as she pleases, unlike the person currently zip-tied to one of the rusty chairs with broken legs. As long as she does not try to seek to be more than friends with you, she’ll be safe from harm. Even though Chrollo’s gut is telling him that she will try, that she will kiss you, say “I love you” to you and maybe go on top of you in bed and-
He tries not to think about it, he is already behind schedule enough as it is, though he could just make Feitan do the work by himself. He tries not to think about it because he has to start preparing his penthouse for your arrival soon to come. He has already purchased some new comforter sets for the bedroom, along with some of the skincare products he knows you use in the bathroom. He’s busy, too busy to involve himself with something other than torturing this man and getting back on track. He focuses on the scene ahead, trying not to think about that friend of yours or the barista who always looks at you for a tad bit too long. If he let his emotions and not logic control him, he would have murdered half this town already and left love notes on their headstones.
He looks at the man, covered in his own blood, his own vomit, his own feces from being confined there for days before Chrollo arrived, deathly thin from starvation and dehydration. From what Feitan told him, Feitan gouged out one eye one day and the other eye the next day, leaving him blind and weeping, his vocal cords far-reaching past their limit, crying out gibberish like some sort of animal, something not too conscious enough of its surroundings to be anything considered even near human.
“Fei, do you hear that?”
“...I do.”
Sexual Drive: 5/10.
Chrollo knows most of what there is to know about sex, but not for his own pleasure. He uses this knowledge mainly in intelligence gathering, when Shalnark, Feitan, and even Pakunoda are not able to get the information the Troupe needs for their next heist. He holds sex with little to no emotional value because of this, since his love for the other Troupe members is high above what little admiration he could possibly hold for those people that he subtly interrogates while fucking them as gently or as hard as they want him to, whispering in their ear when they are feeling their most euphoric, asking them what dons are trading with each other and with what, asking them how the president of this company makes so much when the value of their imports and exports don’t exactly match up, asking them how exactly many secret passageways this mansion has… it’s endless, really, how much information he can get out of them. The human body is so vulnerable, especially when pain mixes with pleasure or pleasure mixes with pain or pain is alone or please is alone. Chrollo is grateful for it.
But when it comes to sex with you, Chrollo then finally sees the emotional side of this spectrum. Your bodies bond and become one, melting into one another as you both moan out each other’s name, lovingly yours and lovingly his.
This development does not surprise him because he does want an emotional bond with you in some sense of the word, he wants you to worship him just as much as he does with you.
Let us go, shall we? Before you could answer, his hand grabs your wrist, his grip making it impossible for someone like you to break away. We… have plenty to talk about and do, correct?
Violence Towards Darling: 3/10.
Don’t take this as a sign that he will not use violence on you at all. Believing that Chrollo's violent tendencies towards you are limited to slapping or ignoring you is a naive assumption. You soon realize that attempting to strike him is futile due to his lightning-fast reflexes. Fighting back against Chrollo will not resolve anything. Instead, you come to understand that he wants you to be like a pet, constantly performing tricks and obediently following his commands.
You wonder if he would also display you like a trophy. Uncertain, you contemplate whether or not you want to find out. Eventually, a few nights later, you dream of a life without Chrollo's constant control, where he does not touch you possessively and parade you around expensive events. You recognize that you are nothing more than his lapdog, his pet, his trophy.
However, Chrollo claims to see something more in you. Is he being genuine in his belief? Do you really desire to uncover the truth?
Violence Towards Others: 8/10.
In his search for you, he maintains his usual calm demeanor, though his eyes reveal his inner turmoil. Anger fills his vision, overshadowing any light. Surely, you couldn't have gone too far. He frantically scans the penthouse until he finds you on the balcony... in the company of someone else.
“Feeling intrusive, are we?”
He pays no mind to the identity of this person, although it's likely they are a former lover or at the very least, a love interest. Your declarations of love and reciprocated kisses leave no room for doubt. How they managed to reach this height is irrelevant to him.
Without uttering a single word, he opens his book, channeling an unseen force from his hands to your ill-fated companion, causing them to plummet to the ground amidst screams from both of you.
After a few moments of tears, mumbled apologies, and the utterance of their name, he informs you that a serious discussion will take place later. With that, you silently follow him back inside. He will contact Shizuku to handle the cleanup of the body in due time.
Vanilla / Kinky
Favorite Kinks:
Begging.
Both inside and outside the bedroom, Chrollo likes having you beg, from you begging him to let you orgasm to you begging him to get you that new book in that series you were quite interested in before you got stolen away. It’s a power dynamic no doubt, it makes him feel wanted by you, needed by you, loved by you. That’s all he wants, really, your love and devotion and for you to promise to be his sun and moon and stars, for you to say he is bigger and more important to me than the sky, for you to hold him, for him to hold you.
No matter how much time passes, how many different places you both stay in and leave, how many countries you visit for leisure or for Chrollo's next big scheme, he refuses to break this unhealthy pattern, even for your sake. He enjoys this routine, so why would he alter it? He will occasionally tease you for being rather selfish, even as you both grow older and wiser and your hairs both white and your skin wrinkly. He will even say it to you when your corpse is resting peacefully in its coffin, as he sheds tears for the first time in many years.
Every time please, Chrollo, please, I… comes out of your mouth, it sounds like to him, the most beautiful martial vow. 
He locks each and every one into the deepest crevices of his heart like unwilling prisoners, despite how small and cold and dead his said heart is, at least to you. They don’t want to stay, but they have to because I want them there in remembrance. Just like you. Poetic, is it not?
Voyeurism. 
The screen in front of him showed you coming out of the shower, your body dripping with soapy water with a towel on your body that barely covered anything and a smaller towel covering your hair that was put up in a clip. Shalnark placing cameras all around your place made things much easier to know things about you that he could not find out through traditional stalking alone. He is grateful for him.
Slowly, as he smiled, one of his hands went into his pants, then his boxers as he caressed the half-hard thing beneath them both. He kept groaning as it got harder and harder, his breathing getting faster and faster. He is not sure how much time had gone by, but he knows that there was now liquid, slow and warm, running down his legs and is all over his hand, and as always, you were none the wiser.
Oral. (Receiving)
Your knees are on the floor, having been there so long it hurts. Your neck is curved backward and your mouth is in pain from his large manhood in there like an unwanted intruder, as you desperately gag and choke and cry. The only reason you have not successfully gotten away is because one of his hands is grabbing the back of your head and pulling you every time you pull, hopelessly still trying to fight.
Your hands are tied behind your back with silk to not damage the skin of your wrists, while you desperately try to claw your way out of them.
You’re in the clothing that he wants you to wear, as usual, though calling it clothing would be an overstatement as it hardly covers anything. A black thong with a short skirt, along with a low-cut bralette. As always, you have no say in the matter, and even though you are unable to utter a word, he showers you with affectionate words, as fake as they seem.
Favorite Parts:
Your Thighs.
It is more of a comfort thing than anything else, really. The way that it is one of the softest parts of you, one of the meatiest parts of you, and, most of all, the easiest parts of you to grab and hold and kiss and press hickeys into and fuck.
It’s only natural for a thief to want to keep their prized possessions close to them, is it not, my darling? 
While Chrollo still places you all of his mementos and diamonds and paintings among the many, many other things he has hidden away in his current penthouse, seeing you as better than all of those things combined, he still sees you, in some ways, as something to be sanctioned, whether it be for your own safety or just his pure, unadulterated selfishness, or perhaps both.
So, he holds onto your thighs at all times pretty much, squeezing the flesh for either attention or just because he needs some security that you are still there with him, no matter how close you physically are to him.
He will occasionally rest his head on your lap, reciting his book aloud while you are obliged to listen. He never dozes off because he is too cautious for that, although he yearns for it. His desire to lie down and have you run your fingers through his hair as he gradually drifts to sleep almost surpasses all his other needs. It may sound like a fantasy for him, no pun intended.
However, it would be a nightmare for you, whether he falls asleep or not. But as always, Chrollo hardly cares. If you dare to object, your longer skirts, shorts, and one pair of sweatpants will vanish for approximately a month, only to be replaced by outrageously short clothes that barely qualify as attire.
They’re soft, just like your lips, your voice, just everything else about you, you, you. It’s the parts that most perfectly describe you, he’ll say, forcing you to tolerate all his touches because his hand is not going anywhere, just like the rest of me, sweetling.
Just stay still and let me see how plush you are just for me, alright?
If he ignores all the goosebumps and the shivers, he can assume that this is what heaven feels like. It must be, right, dearest?
Your Collarbone.
Despite everything else about him, Chrollo can be a sort of traditionalist when he wants to be. This applies quite rarely though, only really affecting the relationship he has with you, both inside and outside of the bedroom.
He likes how the bones stick out, the crevices just so perfect for him to slide the tip of his fingers across, just so perfect for him to kiss and bite, just so perfect to hang necklaces from so they are on a sort of diagonal and reflect the light, making them shine and making them highlight the hickeys that have been pressed into them, right below them, and right above them…
He forces you to wear all kinds of accessories and low-cut shirts that he can find, not caring how much money it would cost, just to see some diamond-encrusted choker on your neck. He says in the calmest voice he can muster that it is no big deal, darling, just trust me and I got this for you and you alone, now why don’t you be a sweetheart and put it on? You might think that a choker and a collar are essentially the same, as they both tightly grip the neck like a suffocating hold. However, Chrollo pays no mind to this, as owners don't concern themselves with their pets realizing they're wearing such a sign of possession.
Your Feet.
Chrollo appreciates art in his own unique way, specifically when it comes to sculpting and realism. He finds your feet to be truly exquisite, along with the rest of you. Despite your attempts to ignore it or cover them up, he has a clear fondness for your feet. Your toes are round, your heels are perfectly shaped, and your soles fit perfectly in his hands when he places heeled shoes on them. In secret, he also enjoys the scent of your feet, although he would never admit it. He would rather die than confess. 
Your feet are cute and can become sweaty and sticky, making them easy to hold onto, just like your thighs. 
Those traits really remind him after you orgasm, with you of course begging repeatedly for it a few moments before he lets you.
It's a hidden pleasure for him, even if you were to discover it, he would keep it to himself. You won't be able to get any information from him. If you do happen to find out, don't be surprised when a substantial portion of your jewelry drawer is filled with anklets.
His Fingers.
Chrollo admires his hands more than most other parts of his body. He trims his fingernails every two weeks, putting hand cream every time he steps out of the bath, never skipping this routine of his. The reason he admires his hands so much is that despite all the bloodshed and other dirty acts he does with them, they remain on the outside clean. It boosts his ego, in a way.
There are just so many uses for them, he loves flipping the pages of his favorite novels with them, he loves cutting food for both you and himself with them, he loves squeezing your thigh as either a warning or a sign of love… there are just endless possibilities, at least from his perspective.
But his new favorite thing is to fuck your clit with them, and yours alone.
Is it a privilege, then, that only yours can bring him such joy? Whether you believe it to be so or not, it holds no significance, for Chrollo finds pleasure in this, and only his satisfaction matters, given that he is the one who has taken you captive.
Please, Chrollo, fuck me, fuck me, fuck me, I can’t take this anymore I-
His movements are flawlessly executed, almost unfairly so. They are deliberate yet unhurried, demanding your submission. However, he will only grant you this pleasure if you plead for it. The act of begging will consume several minutes, perhaps even a minimum of two, leaving you in a state of desperation. Meanwhile, he will revel in your discomfort, relishing the power he holds over you. This perverse satisfaction is what he adores the most.
As you wish.
Inevitably, you will find yourself succumbing to your desires, unable to resist the overwhelming pleasure he provides. Despite your stubbornness, your willpower will eventually crumble under the weight of his expertise.
He derives immense pleasure from knowing that he alone possesses the ability to bring you such ecstasy. This knowledge fuels his ego, heightening his sense of self-importance.
His Words.
Chrollo has an insatiable thirst for knowledge, but he also derives great pleasure from imparting knowledge and amusingly embarrassing others. And when it comes to you, he takes it to another level.
He constantly showers you with compliments, comparing you to famous heroines like Juliet and Ophelia from classic literature. He insists that you possess the same beauty as any damsel in distress from those timeless tales. To prove his point, he even offers to acquire paintings of these fictional princesses and damsels for you to admire and compare yourself to.
Wanting a break from his constant attention, you agree to his proposal. Besides, you get the bonus of owning some exquisite artwork. What could go wrong, right?
Well, it turns out to be a colossal mistake.
Upon waking up, you find yourself surrounded by what feels like an entire museum filled with paintings of fictional damsels, duchesses, princesses, and queens. The overwhelming presence of these artworks threatens to suffocate you. And to make matters worse, Chrollo insists on meticulously going through each painting one by one, forcing you to endure this ordeal that could very well last for days.
Your legs resemble hers, your lips resemble hers, your feet resemble hers... every aspect of your physique and the muse's physique that he remarks upon, leaves you feeling incredibly exposed, more so than ever before.
The duration of this process is absolutely exasperating. It leaves you feeling as defenseless as a lamb anticipating its fate in the hands of a butcher.
His Knowledge.
Chrollo truly treasures his knowledge, viewing it as divine nectar from the heavens, if indeed it exists. This belief is so strong that he occasionally overestimates it, taking every opportunity to display it in a way that impresses you more than anything else he does, both inside and outside of the bedroom. Whether intentionally or not, he will state the obvious, like pointing out that the creature you're observing in the rose garden during your “date” is not a slug, but a snail. 
It frustrates you, but you acknowledge that it could be worse–he could forbid you from venturing outdoors altogether. 
Surely, that counts for something, doesn't it? 
…Doesn’t it?
Fantasies. (Consent / Non-Con) (Coercion / Brute Force)
If one were to make a comparison, they would compare you to a piece of art so beautiful, that it is instinct to witness, praise, and worship until their bodies all turn to mere dust, in which they will be swept away by those alive who do not want your refinement to be stained by those who have passed on. For what is a beauty without a beholder? Chrollo will gladly take up that role, as he is the only one worthy of seeing such a piece. You, leaning on the pillows, legs crossed, hair put up in a neat bun, wearing makeup that he has said he likes on you before, looking up at him like he has come to bless you with a mere glimpse of the divine power he holds, wearing the black lingerie he chose for you to wear this evening, made of lace with patterns of roses scattered about.
This is his welcome home gift, from both himself and you. He may have requested that you could partake in this, but since you are doing it without any complaint but instead loving doing the task at hand, he could consider him soon becoming one with your body for the evening to be an award from you for all the work he has done for the Troupe these past few days.
If such a prize is laid before him, ripe for the taking, why wouldn’t he? So, without so much as uttering another word, he starts to undress as you watch, a mix of genuine joy and interest laid out on your face. He hasn’t even touched you yet, and with this simple act, you are bound to him with the invisible thread of lust.
When his boxers are all the way down, he approaches, and you don’t blink, wanting to take it all in. Shall the fun start? When your lips meet, all reservations that you once had dissolve, as few as they are now.
(But don’t think Chrollo respects your boundaries completely when it comes to sex; if you deny him enough, over the course of months and months, he will break his composure and show you where you belong; underneath him.)
→ Strengths.
Realities. (Your Own, His Avow) (Patient / Impatient)
The being that is above you in this bed is unlike any human you have ever met before. His looks and personality are all artificially crafted, like some automaton made to resemble actual living things, but do not stray far from their roots, what they were made for, and what they were made of. I’m real, you think, I’m real. Chrollo is not.
He’s aware of everything you do. Every step you take. Every word you say.
He is aware. He possesses knowledge of all things, much like the god he feigns to be. His understanding of emotions is as keen as his logical reasoning, resulting in a situation of dread that pertains solely to you.
It instills fear within you because he holds the key to all knowledge, while you remain in not-so-blissful ignorance.
→ Weaknesses.
Lotus Eater. (Dreamy Idleness)
Chrollo, despite his attempts to appear superior to others, is not without his flaws. If those around him stroke his ego, he becomes overly confident. Yet, if one were to try the opposite approach, it would have the same effect as boosting his ego. He is cursed with arrogance, always believing he is superior to others, even some members of the Troupe. Perhaps you can use this knowledge to your advantage. Faking affection could lower his guard and further inflate his narcissism. It is a strategic move, preferable to engaging in a physical fight that you cannot possibly win. 
Therefore, when you believe you have the opportunity to escape when his guard seems lowered enough that he won't immediately pursue you, you run. At that moment, his facade will crack, his eyes will grow emptier, and the hollow husk chasing after you will not resemble the Chrollo you once knew.
→ Daily Life.
Welcome. (Day One)
Chrollo remains a mystery begging to be left unsolved.
He rises at his usual hour each morning, and it's a rarity to witness him actually sleeping. His breakfast consistently consists of sausage and eggs, seasoned solely with salt and pepper, as he avoids other spices. He purchases fresh bread from whichever local bakery happens to be closest for the week or a few days ahead. Occasionally, if you're fortunate, he may bring back something sweet while out and about, such as a chocolate-filled croissant or a cherry jam-filled danish. However, trust, whether in platonic or romantic relationships, is something that must be earned.
Interestingly, it appears that regardless of the circumstances, Chrollo seems to possess a certain level of trust that you won't make any foolish choices. On your initial day in this penthouse, he simply greeted you, patiently waiting until the effects of the drugs wore off, allowing you to cry on the bed until your tears ran dry. He comforted you, softly shushing you and gently caressing your cheeks with his thumb.
Yet, he never becomes too intimate.
Was that his motive? Is that why he opted to masquerade as a compassionate gentleman rather than a captor? Instead of asserting his authority, he chose to console you, demonstrating that such solace could be snatched away in an instant. You were oblivious to his true intentions. On that initial day, you wept more than any other day, the taste of mint on Chrollo's breath and the aroma of coffee still etched in your memory. He would inflict further harm, and for the sake of your sanity, you believe it is preferable for him to remain an enigma, shielding you from the repulsive monster lurking beneath his attractive facade.
What Could Be. (And What Is)
Strangely enough, there are still parts of your life after Chrollo has captured you that would still sort of count as normal enough that you could turn the other way and ignore all other cosmic horrors that are happening in the general vicinity. You could still decide what you want to eat and drink that day, what to watch, what to read, what time to wake up and what time to go to bed, what to write in your diary (that not-so-strangely has its lock missing now), listen to the morning birds or to the music that Chrollo allows you to listen to (which is most of it, shockingly)... the list really is endless, really, aside from a few things that you forget sometimes, much to future you’s horror.
But sometimes you forget on purpose, to divulge in the fantasy Chrollo has carefully crafted for both of you, either to fool him or your walls really are as broken down as he wants them to be.
He finds it nice when you ask him questions about whatever place he has rented for the two of you for the time being, the location at hand most likely being related to the Troupe’s plans to steal whatever is of value. He likes to show off, and to listen to him talk for hours requires the patience of a saint.
→ Punishments. (No Punishments / Tortuous Punishments)
Welcome Again. (Failed Departure)
The penthouse looked to be the same after you ran out the entrance door that you lockpicked. The fireplace was still lit. There was still a smell of peppermint in the air along with some scent of coffee, lattes maybe. Everything looks the same, just as it always has. It nearly scares you more, how calm and warm this place is, than the hand that has a grip on your wrist so tight that you feel like he will dislocate it in the very least.
But he does not look angry, but that smile is not good at all either.
He does not say anything as he closes the door behind him, turning the lock on the door so it will remain that way. He does not say anything as he continues to drag you, albeit a bit more tight in his grip now that you are within his grasp once again. Whatever you say goes in one ear and out the other, and you know better than to struggle and scream, because you do not want this day to result in yet another bloodbath, and it would be useless anyway, even if someone came to rescue you. That is why, like the sort of pet you were trained to be, you bite your tongue and obey. He seems to not be angry now, but who knows what awaits you once you are in the bedroom, where most talks and actions are the consequences of your supposed crimes. You can’t really breathe, but that is alright. Chrollo will help you every step of the way after all, as the dutiful owner he has come to be.
Perhaps a pet is all you will be.
He wants you to look up at him like some god, some deity that you worship with all your being. But you can’t, not yet, and Chrollo knows that. Perhaps some methods unknown to you but known to him can help, can’t it?
He hopes so for your sake, but what do you hope for, wish for? You don’t know, and maybe never will.
Venus Fly Trap. (Temptations of a Liar)
Chrollo is well aware of the diverse array of predatory flowers, each manifesting in its own unique way. Perhaps you too possess such characteristics, with your alluring fragrance and honeyed speech, deceiving him into a false sense of security before stripping it all away. However, there is one crucial detail you seem to have overlooked. What transpires when a venus fly trap ensnares a prey that surpasses its own size and devours its own kind and others, rather than the typical fly it ensnares?
Undoubtedly, they suffer. Yet it appears that this lesson has eluded you thus far, hasn't it?
You have displayed kindness, sweetness, and a willingness to comply, within certain limits. Undoubtedly, you possess some degree of skill, though not enough to deceive him, the enigmatic masked orchestrator of this theatrical production.
Therefore, it is without much remorse that he renders you motionless with delicate silk and persuasive words that possess the potential to sting, should you ever dare to push him too far.
However, deep down you are aware of the truth, just as he is aware too. If he doesn't take a firm stance, what other undesirable situations will you find yourself in? With a single hand, he flips open the book, while using the other to shush you.
“A shame,” He says, turning the pages. “A crying shame, really. The sky is so lovely tonight… Who knows when we will get this scenery again, hmm?”
You don’t know what he will do to you. 
…Does he?
→ Quotes.
Hello.
Greetings. It is truly an honor to meet you face to face like this at long last, [First]. There is no need to introduce yourself to me as I already know who you are. That, and… hmm. That, and I think you are not all there right now. Please, I recommend relaxing and listening to what I have to say. But just to make sure, try to speak to me… as expected.
Chat: Ballet.
All dancers must put themselves fully into whatever moves they do. I suppose that can be the same thing for you and me.
Chat: Athenaeum.
Libraries and archives are some of the places I enjoy going to the most. Maybe if you continue behaving, I’ll take you to one nearby.
Chat: Reimbursement. 
Quid pro quo, darling; I assume you know the best ways to compensate me for the broken locks?
When It Rains.
The rain is perfect for a day of staying inside. Though, hehe… you’ll be indoors no matter what, right? Good thing you have me as company today. …What do you mean? I leave sometimes, mainly to get you things might I add. I suggest being more grateful if you don’t want that koala plush to disappear.
After It Rains.
Sigh… the smell of morning dew and the sounds of birds chirping… simply marvelous. Let’s go dance on the balcony, but be sure not to get your new shoes wet and slip. I would hate to have to bring Machi again.
When Thunder Strikes.
Aw, are you going to cling to me so cutely whenever there is a storm? I wouldn’t mind that, I’ll even give you more blankets to hide in if you wish. …Wait, dearest, come back… sigh… of course she hid under the bed again.
When It Snows.
So cold out there, isn’t it? If you ask nicely, I’ll give you back your socks and slippers. Go on.
When the Sun Is Out.
Let’s go on a walk tonight when it’s not so hot out. The sunset’s beauty will only be second to your own.
Good Morning.
Good morning, love, I made coffee. Feel free to use one of the creamers I got you, and there is oat milk near them somewhere in the fridge… Hm? I have never really been a fan of sweet drinks, so black coffee tastes good to someone like me. 
Good Afternoon.
Sure, you can cook lunch. But allow me to cut the ingredients and heat sources. We know how you used them last time.
Good Evening.
It’s so quiet you can only hear the crickets chirping. It’s quite a romantic atmosphere, isn't it?
Good Night.
Ah ah ah. No bed for you yet. Give me a goodnight kiss first. No, you can’t sleep on the couch either. Or the floor. If you keep refusing, I’m going to ask you more questions than yesterday. …That’s better.
About Chrollo: Tattoos.
There is something comforting about them, I think. No matter what the person does to reject it, it will stay. The permanence of such an act should also be what you should be. Now, bite me again and you will sooner than later find yourself in a tattoo parlor. Am I understood?
About Chrollo: Lies.
Don’t say that, my love. I’m not lying to you, I’m just picking what parts of the truth to show and hide. There is no harm in that, I think. 
About Us: Home.
This place is much more human with you in it. Do with that as you wish.
About Us: Cull.
Life and death have a sort of agreement. A contract if you will. The more lives taken by your hands, the more your own life is put at risk. Quite poetic. Like everything else in life, there must be balance.
About Us: Matrimony.
Being bound by just a few words… The very idea is beautiful in my opinion. If you want, we can get married. It is not like anyone else is going to put that pretty ring finger of yours to good use, anyway.
About Us: Panoply.
Anything you want you shall receive. Just say the word. Unless it is already here, which is a possibility.
About You: Humanity.
The human psyche is truly fascinating, don’t you agree? All it takes is a few words or a few actions and it all comes crumbling down. Like you.
About You: Epiphany. 
Not a man, not ten men, not a hundred men can ever provide me with the same joy you give me. You’re special, you know? You make me feel… alive.
Something to Share.
“Be glad as children, as birds in the sky.” A quote from Fyodor Dostoevsky. But… birds are constantly migrating to better places, so really, are they grateful and glad for the gift of life?
Interesting Things.
I see you are doing experiments with pH again. Just be sure to not use all of the vinegar, please. And no, vinegar cannot melt a door, for the final time. 
About Nobunaga.
He thinks more with his heart than his head. But he means well for the Troupe. Or himself when he makes someone call to order takeout for him. 
About Feitan.
I learned a lot of torture methods from him. He truly is the best at what he does. As for social skills… not so much. But everyone has their ups and downs, and that is Fei’s.
About Machi.
One of the most loyal people I have ever met. Also one of the most in tune with their wants and needs. If she thinks of something to say, she’ll say it without a doubt. She is very transparent when it comes to that kind of thing.
About Hisoka.
Hisoka… he is very… out there, isn’t he? But he is valuable to me, so I give him free rein to do whatever he wishes.
About Phinks.
One of the physically strongest. Though also one of the only ones to ever get a laugh out of me. Shizuku once asked him why he did not have any eyebrows, and the way he stopped talking and stared at the ceiling caused us all to snicker. Feitan did earn a blow to the head by the end of it because Phinks does not hit women… He is much more gentlemanly than he appears.
About Shalnark.
When it comes to computers and such, Shalnark is the person to do it. He was the one to convince me to get a newer phone model and taught me how it worked. He kept chuckling as he did, and every question I had asked earned a wide smile in response but no actual answer. He says I am an… “old man at heart…?”
About Franklin.
He is not the most talkative one out there, but if ever comes to games to decide matters, he is the one for the job. Once, Uvogin betted fifty thousand Jenny if he ever beat me in chess. Franklin managed to almost win in the end, but he gave up at the last moment. He said he couldn’t bear to do that to me.
About Shizuku.
At long last, she at least remembers my name. She is quite charming in her own way… I see why Franklin took on a sort of caretaker role for her.
About Pakunoda.
Paku… Paku is one of the sweetest people I know. Whenever I didn’t feel well, she was the first one to come and help me feel better. She even fed me her rations, regardless of the tough times we were put through. I should ask her to make me soup again, I have missed the taste of it…
About Bonolenov.
When he trusts you enough, he has quite a humorous and proud side. He is very proud of his culture, and as someone who did not have one as a child, I find it very admirable.
About Uvogin.
I swear he could drink enough beer to kill a whale and still not be satisfied. The same goes for fights. Any challenge goes, whether that is an eating or video game contest.
About Kortopi.
His copying ability is quite useful, and Nobunaga wanted to give him a haircut using his sword. He declined of course, much to Nobunaga’s disappointment. …Hm? A copy of you? No, you are priceless, and nothing can ever compare, even a version of you that does everything I ask. There is a charm to your disobedience. That, and Kortopi cannot make living copies.
More About Chrollo: I.
Come. I got you some books for us to read together. But before you touch them, I must tell you that you can only read them while on my lap. Isn’t that such a great deal, dearest?
More About Chrollo: II.
“Better to reign in Hell than serve in Heaven…” Yes, I can see the parallels between this line and myself. Is that why you decided to show me this? …Oh, you just wanted an excuse to call me Lucifer again. Do what you wish, I suppose. But please put that book back on the shelf where it came from when you are done. You know I hate it when you mess up the categories. …Hm? Don’t do that, or I won’t get you any more mochi. …You know my threats aren’t empty, my dear.
More About Chrollo: III.
…Do you need something from me, dearest? No? …Why am I asking? So you just happen to be pressing your chest against my arm for no apparent reason? …I see. Well, if you want my attention so badly, who am I to refuse?
More About Chrollo: IV.
Yes, that note is from me. That gift is also from me. Open it, please. …You should try wearing that set next time. Your thighs will stand out better. You were the one that was asking last night, not me. Ah, you are feeling rather adventurous these past few weeks, aren’t you? …Looking for something? Is this it? You know, I’m disappointed in you, to put it frankly. I thought you were coming around. You know what happens now, don’t you?
More About Chrollo: V.
Time has certainly sped by, hasn’t it? Let me give you a word of advice. No matter what happens, always remember those who have gotten you to where you are now. As a result, your situation can prove to be much less isolating that way. …Yes, that includes me. For when you are alone, my dear, your mind always finds a way to eat you whole.
Chrollo’s Hobbies.
Leading an orchestra and executing a grand theft operation share fundamental principles. It is imperative to maintain a commanding presence, ensuring that others adhere to your lead. Collaboration becomes the pivotal factor in achieving triumph during such endeavors.
Chrollo’s Troubles.
I find it perplexing how some individuals effortlessly navigate life with a serene demeanor, rooted in their unwavering sense of self. Maybe it stems from a twinge of envy, or perhaps there's another elusive element at play. But being envious is part of being human, is it not?
Favorite Food: Black Squid Ink Carbonara.
It is briny, and salty, like the sea. Quite refreshing as well, especially paired with homemade pasta. Only the best quality is allowed. …I am not being too picky. Do you know how many children in Meteor City have grown up never eating from a fast food place, much less a local restaurant? I simply am greedy because I can now. I couldn’t before, and that is why I do so as an adult.
Favorite Food: Opulence. 
As an adult, my current ability to indulge in greed is a newfound privilege that I couldn't have experienced previously. Hence, I find it impossible to resist the temptation of adding an extra serving of truffle or caviar to my plate.
Least Favorite Food: Canned Cabbage.
One of the very few foods I refused to eat unless absolutely necessary was canned cabbage. It was slimy and always came in watery vinegar with mostly moldy parts… I was desperate, but not desperate enough to eat that. Machi, Nobunaga, and Phinks all agreed. Feitan didn’t, much to everyone’s annoyance.
Least Favorite Food: Waste.
Paku, Machi, and Feitan had a sort of pact that they forced on the rest of us to never throw away things that were still edible. According to Shalnark and Uvogin, moldy food is still edible. Phinks and I disagreed but… we got outvoted. 
Receiving a Gift: I.
Indulging in scrumptious meals truly possesses the power to alleviate all worries. So, how can I express my gratitude?
Receiving a Gift: II.
Oh? Thank you, dearest. …For your own good, you better not have put salt instead of sugar this time.
Receiving a Gift: III.
Ah... considering you seem to have a moment to spare, would you be interested in sitting down and enjoying a shared reading session? The choice of material is entirely up to you, of course.
Chrollo’s Birthday.
You are such a prize, you know? You’re in an outfit worth its weight in gold, actually, now that I think about it, diamonds. Autumn has set in, the weather gets colder, and the food gets warmer. Perfect time for spending quality time with someone, wouldn’t you say so? Please, allow me to do this with you, [First]. I have never really cared for this day if I am being honest, but… now that you are here, I feel like new opportunities are around every corner.
Birthday.
Happy birthday, [First]. Within reason, I would like to treat you to whatever your heart desires. Food, art, wine; anything, just tell me, alright? I will see to it. …Heh. I’m afraid a fall from this penthouse will not be enough to kill me. …No, I am not going to put it to the test, since I am certain about it. Please think of something else. The world is your oyster, dearest. But… remember that I can always close it before you can get to the pearl.
Feelings About You: Ethereal.
This feeling… I haven’t felt something like this since… Hmm? Am I? Quite the observation.
Feelings About You: Euphonious. 
…I miss your voice, you know. I always like it when you get caught up in a topic that interests you, no matter what it is. …But last time I took the gag off and took you out, you behaved quite terribly… Here, I’ll tell you what. I’ll take the gag off, and I’ll get you something related to your interests, and then we can talk about it. Does that sound good to you?
Feelings About You: Eternity.
We shall be together forever, bonded at the hip if we must be. I promise you. Do not worry about the details. It does not matter if you like it or not, because I will take care of whatever obstacles get in our way. Whether that obstacle is you or any… outsiders.
Feelings About You: Elision.
Do know that I do mean it when I say that I do want to make you happy. Yes, our relationship is less than ideal, but in the end, just know my feelings for you are indeed sincere. …I’m not exactly willing to take criticism, but I could try, perhaps. If you like to do so, I am willing to compromise, though.
→ Conclusion.
You never hear Chrollo in his movements, but you do in his actions when he wants you to.
He puts far more effort into the little things, the details than outright saying his feelings for you, or just telling you his threats. That mysterious gift that appeared on your bed while you were away at work, that just so happens to contain some of your favorite sweets? 
The bouquet on your kitchen table that was placed while you were asleep? The box of dozens if not at least a hundred pictures of you by your mailbox when you tried to file a police report? 
Chrollo is patient to a fault. You will never know what is happening, at its fullest, until it is far too late.
You can put as much blame on yourself as you want, and hate yourself as much as you want, for not realizing how dangerous this entire situation is. But this position under Chrollo’s thumb is so much more horrifying than you could ever imagine, so do not blame yourself for not noticing everything at once.
That is not to say Chrollo won’t try to degrade you into thinking this is all your fault.
Your walls will be as good as broken and crumbled down sooner than you think.
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withahappyrefrain · 5 months
Note
Okay but I’d love to talk mob Peter and model on his yacht where he is supposed to be on vacation but keeps having to do work which leads to his girl getting bored/ finding ways to get him to focus on her and like at this point peter is no longer nervous and bad at dating he’s pissed and someone’s getting fcuked on a deck
YES also this got away from me whoops
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When Peter said he would be on vacation, it really means he would be working only fifty percent of the time.
It's better than the whole time. And it certainly wouldn't be difficult to lure him away with a skimpy bikini, with promises of hot tubs and cocktails.
At least, so one thought.
The skimpy bikinis were becoming more beneficial for even tanning rather than seducing Peter.
Apparently vacation time is the best time for everything at work to go to shit.
It makes sense that Peter is the go to person. He's in charge, which means they want his approval before making a decision.
But why did it have to take thirty to forty five minutes for a damn decision to be approved?
It doesn't help that they were having such a lovely time out on the deck before his phone rang, his mouth exploring yours, hands about to discover that there was nothing underneath that cute little sundress you had on.
It has been twenty minutes past too long since he answered the phone.
Which left you no choice but to take matters into your own hands.
You flipped over onto your stomach, the action causing the hem of your dress to rise past your thighs.
Peter saw, given by the way he raised an eyebrow. For a moment, his eyes were fixated on you, on your body. But then someone calls his name over the phone, and he's back to talking to Felicia.
That just won't do.
So you prop yourself up on your knees and elbows, arching your back enough for the hem of your dress to slide closer to your waist, giving Peter a generous glimpse of your ass, revealing the surprise you had planned for him.
When you looked back, his eyes, now dark, were fixated on you. His free hand was running along his beard, up and down his freckled neck, a nervous habit he displayed ever since your first date. Long fingers danced along the silver chain you loved to pull on.
He holds his hand up, fingers spread as he mouths "five minutes" to you.
But that seems like an eternity.
You truly didn't mean to moan so loudly when your fingers found your clit. They weren't as thick or calloused as Peter's, but feeling something after going untouched this whole morning felt incredible.
It's so good that you don't hear Peter abruptly and gruffly hanging up. You don't hear him unzip his pants or reach for the bottle of lube.
When you do feel, is his cock slamming into you, a hand grabbing both of yours and holding them by your wrists.
"You little slut, just couldn't fucking wait," He hisses, slamming into you, ignoring your cries of pleasure.
"N-No. Needed it s'bad," you whine, unashamed.
His cock makes you feel so full, makes your toes curl, makes you unable to focus on anything other than how fucking good he makes you feel.
"Yeah, I can tell. Showing off your cunt to me and everyone else who's sailing by," He grunts, his tough facade almost faltering when your walls squeeze his cock so well.
"T-took s'long. Couldn't help it." It's really a miracle you're able to speak somewhat coherently, considering the way Peter's rutting into you, his fingers drawing circles on your aching clit.
"Oh? Now it's my fault you just couldn't wait five minutes?" His fingers are moving with precision, "Let's see if I can beat my personal record of making this cunt come over my cock.'
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aubeystawby · 10 months
Text
THEY DON'T KNOW A THING ABOUT THE RAIN CLOUDS daring charming x gn!rebel!reader ➤ summary: Daring is alone, stuck in a place where no one really understands him. Funnily enough, you know how that feels, maybe the two of you can be lonely together.
OR
Daring: I’ve never had a friend before. Reader: It’s okay, I’ll be your friend. Daring: ...I’ve never had a partner before either.
➤ notes: i got an idea and dumped a bunch of baggage on this guy! only gendered term used is daring referring to reader with "partner" (romantically) ➤ warnings: just a bit generally sad in the beginning, daring has troubles with like self worth and no one Genuinely liking him
It's not obvious that Daring is lonely. He's painfully popular, he has friends, he had a girlfriend until a 'mutual' breakup a couple weeks ago — which means he's now got dozens of princes and princesses lining up in the hopes of being the next —, and he's close with his siblings, whom he cares about very much. He should be perfectly not lonely; an ideal person with an ideal life everyone should strive for.
So really, with someone so 'obviously' perfect, who's constantly surrounded by friends and admirers alike, it should be no surprise just how lonely he is.
It shows in the cracks, in the seams of his perfectly stitched clothes, when he stands in front of his bedroom mirror late at night while his roommate is elsewhere, and just stares.
There's nothing wrong with him, he whispers, but something is still not right.
He realises slowly it's because his life is so superficial.
People love him because he's a charming, a dashing prince destined for amazing adventures of legendary heroics, not for the boy who makes jokes he really does think are rather clever, or for the genuinely thoughtful nature hidden just beneath his shining jacket and standoffish demeanour. People only laugh at his jokes because he's Daring Charming, because he's popular.
He asked his friends once what they thought of a certain joke he'd made, and not a single one could say anything genuine, none of them even really understood it, they just laughed because Daring Charming was saying it.
Apple only ever dated him because she was meant to, because it was her destiny. She's sweet, she's kind, but none of it was ever truly real, she never truly — beneath all the responsibilities and feeling like she had to — wanted to be with him.
Daring feels a sort of pit in his stomach when he thinks about Apple. She was his first girlfriend, his first kiss, but none of it was true. If he thinks about it long enough, none of it ever mattered to her like it did to him. And every time he realises this, he quickly buries it. Guilt. Apple is a good person, truly. It's not her fault. Truly.
Daring can't look at all the people tripping over their own feet for him the same anymore, all he sees are people bound by the same thing that brought Apple to him; they think they should be with a Charming. None of them want to be with him for him.
He reminds himself anyone would trade everything they have to be him, to live his life, to have such a 'perfect' fairytale waiting for them, so he's not allowed to feel sad, he's not allowed to hate this life as much as he does. He needs to be grateful, because his life is wonderful, his life is perfect.
Daring has grown to hate perfection, deep down in his stomach during dark sleepless nights and the spaces between breaths, hidden in places where he allows it — just for a moment — because he thinks that there, it can do no harm, there it doesn't make him a bad, ungrateful, person.
It was too late to turn back when he was faced with the fact that his whole life had become solely those moments.
He hadn't even been the one to realise it, to look around and see his growing isolation, to see the dimness in his eyes, the shadow following him around like a miserable storm cloud. It had been you.
You, someone with a destiny that had nothing to do with him, nothing to do with princes or princesses at all.
You, a rebel, who never befriended someone you didn't want to, who made connections with your classmates not out of necessity but genuine curiosity.
You, who didn't always laugh at Daring's jokes like everyone else did, but always smiled. Even if you thought what he said was dumb or unfunny, there would always still be a soft look on your face with your lips upturned, for you recognised the playful glimmer in his eyes and couldn't help but be happy that he was happy.
You, who was the first and only to notice he was no longer okay, and immediately checked on him like he imagines a true friend would.
Daring only just realises he's been rambling, been saying anything that comes to mind, and just telling you everything. He can't decide whether this feels freeing or mortifying.
"...And now I'm here..." Daring mutters, avoiding eye contact with you from where you sit beside him.
You don't say anything for a moment, and he's scared he's lost you, when you tentatively rest your hand on his where it's placed on his knee.
If Daring wasn't so scared of you laughing in his face and telling everyone how pathetic he is, he'd register the slightest uptick in his heartbeat, or the way he inexplicably wants to shuffle closer to you. But for now his face is just the slightest bit warmer for a reason he refuses to acknowledge.
"I don't want to say I understand," You finally speak up, voice soft and thumb tracing comforting circles on the back of Daring's hand, "Because I don't exactly, considering I'm not..." A prince, a princess, or even just royalty.
You see the slightest nod from Daring, telling you he understands, and you take it as a sign to continue.
"But, I get what it's like to... to feel like your life isn't your own, like no one around you is genuine or... Real?... I know what that's like."
Daring feels something deep in his chest, a spark and a murmur, something that draws him to you, and he finally understands that you're like him. You see him for who he is, and he sees you.
You're struggling to say it, words hesitant and unsure, but he understands.
"I don't know if... — before everything with Raven not signing, and then finally feeling like I had a choice — I don't know if I'd had many true friends either. I mean I think I did, sometimes... which isn't the same as you..."
Your voice trails off quietly and you curse yourself internally for messing up your sentiment so badly, but when you go to make some sort of self deprecation for being so bad with words and profusely apologise for what you're sure sounded like kicking Daring while he's down, he surprises you — which you're starting to realise is something you might need to get used to.
"No, you're right."
There's something different when he speaks this time, in the way he doesn't sound as defeated, like there's something there that wasn't there before.
Hope. Trust.
You welcome the change — the light at the end of the tunnel — with open arms.
"What I mean is..." You take another deep breath, turning your gaze to Daring, catching his eyes with something he finds he can't look away from, "I may not have had very many true friends... you may not have had many true friends... So... we could be eachother's friends?"
It's a question more than a statement, your nervousness more than apparent in the fear you may have crossed a boundary, your wish to help Daring — and the more selfish desire to spend time with him for your own sake of just liking being around him — having gone too far and landing you right in creep territory.
Daring surprises you again.
His smile isn't like the boasting ones you're used to, it's happier, more authentic. It's true.
He doesn't realise he's nodding, and you don't notice it either, your attention solely on his joyful expression, internally begging yourself not to be horribly embarrassing and cry happy tears.
It feels sudden — but really it's slow, tentative — when Daring flips his hand for your palms to now touch, your hands clinging onto eachother without a second thought. It never even crosses your mind to pull away.
"Y'know..." Daring begins, his voice still tender but louder — more confident — than before, "I've never had a real partner either..."
You can't stop your eyes from widening, how many times is it that Daring Charming has surprised you in the past ten minutes now!?
You're ready to laugh awkwardly, desperately try to hide how much you do want to be with him like that, maybe even run away and avoid him for the rest on eternity lest this all be a joke — but your mouth has other plans.
"Neither have I—"
The kiss is quick, your lips meet his for just a second, and suddenly you're both ten times the flustered messes than you were before.
"—We could be eachother's partners."
Daring's unmistakable grin reflects your own equally elated one.
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ravixen · 9 months
Note
hi!! hehe i read ur partner privileges post and i was wondering if u could do the same for vocal unit if possible?? thank you! 🫶
svt + prioritizing their s/o (pt 2)
➔ reaction || requested || vocal unit
➔ warnings: none || 0.9k words ➔ notes: fluff ; hiya, thanks for the love :) the concept for this series isn't partner privilege since I'm saving that for a different idea, but I definitely know which reaction you're talking about. I hope you reblog the other post and this post if you enjoyed reading them! also a reminder to followers: I block any empty blogs/blogs with less than 3 posts or reblogs :)
JEONGHAN: his calculation skills are unmatched, but you think highly of him in general so you're not sure if the praise means much. you can always tell when he's thinking because his face freezes into an open smile, maybe an stilted laugh, as his eyes flicker around the space, and you practically hear his synapses firing as he weighs out options and draws conclusions. you're almost envious of this ability; it always takes you a little longer to see what he sees. while he's zipping through the forest path, you're getting stuck on bushes and low branches, and this frustration is what makes you reluctant to join in on games sometimes. of course, he notices this, too. when you get too quiet, he sidles up to you, murmuring barely audible suggestions. "tell seungkwan about cheol's betrayal tactic. bring up minghao's shopping trip from the other day—it'll be funny. shout over mingyu whenever he starts talking," he'll say without blinking an eye. the first time, you were hesitant and missed the timing, but he continued standing next to you, waiting for the next opportunity. it's helped your confidence a lot, and no one has caught on yet (or so you think). every time, he's reacting along with everyone else, letting you take the spotlight, because he'd rather help you out than claim credit.
JOSHUA: found in part one!
JIHOON: you know he's a busy guy, so you always tell him that he doesn't have to pick up your calls, but he does anyway, no matter what he's doing. if he's truly busy, then he'll tell you immediately and say that he'll call you back later, but if it's nothing too pressing, then he doesn't mind listening to you talk for however long you want. sometimes you catch him in the studio or watching anime, and he lays on the couch, phone on his chest, to hear about your day. sometimes you catch him out on errands, and he puts you on speakerphone as he drives. sometimes you catch him out with friends, who always have to make their presence known in the few precious seconds they have before your boyfriend steps away to a quiet corner. you ask him about it once, and at first, he makes a bad joke to deflect, but after a moment, he admits that it's to show you his sincerity. he loves knowing that he's the first person you call for good news, bad news, boring news—and he never wants that to change. "I'm worried that..." he fiddles with his t-shirt hem as you wait. "well, I'm worried that if I don't pick up enough, I'll stop being your number one contact, and I really like being the first person you think of."
SEOKMIN: he likes to include you on every decision, and it's really sweet...when you don't have decision fatigue, at least. but how can you get irritated with him when he blinks up at you with those big bright eyes that hold nothing but adoration for you? over time, you learn to differentiate when he actually has an opinion and when he doesn't care what you choose. for example, I think the strawberry cake sounds good. Is that okay? means that he wants it, though if you wholeheartedly disagree, he'll find a compromise—like buying two cakes. on the other hand, I think the strawberry cake sounds good. What do you think? means that you can choose whatever you want. at the core of it, he just wants you to know that you matter to him, and the easiest way to do that is to listen to you. it's not really a pet peeve, but he doesn't like when people unilaterally decide on things, so he makes sure to never do that to you. "I'm sure I'll like whatever you choose," you tell him, but he shakes his head. "what if you don't? I should ask just in case." he covers it with an over-dramatic pout and cutesy voice that make you laugh, but he's serious. your opinion and happiness will always matter to him.
SEUNGKWAN: you don't know how he manages to remember so many of your favorite things, but he does and he uses this mental catalogue to impress you all the time. it's not just your favorite things, either; he somehow recalls the things you've mentioned in passing, things that even you have forgotten, and it's really impressive when he takes you out for food you've been craving, when he drops off an item that you've ran out of, when he says he looked up tips on how to clean ketchup stains. "how do you do that?" you stare in amazement as he pulls up a reservation to a restaurant you've been dying to try. "how do you make room in that brilliant brain of yours for all of these details?" he rolls his eyes, but there's a smile tugging on his lips at the praise. "I just erase some of our early choreography to free up mental disk space," he says, laughing. "c'mon, is it really that unbelievable? you know I like remembering things about the people I care about. you're obviously included in that group. I like making you feel special to me because you are." he pretends to dig his knuckles into your cheek, scolding you for thinking otherwise. honestly, you can't quite figure out seungkwan's love language because he's the type to show his affection with every action.
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onefourone · 2 months
Text
How the 141 boys would propose!
Warnings: none
Pairing(s): 141 x GN!Reader
John Price
He'd probably be hesitant to even think about the idea of marriage
Between the long deployments and the general danger surrounding his job, he just doesn't feel like he'd be a good enough husband for you
But he couldn't ignore the blissful look on your face whenever you spoke about marriage with your friends when you thought he wasn't listening
Or how you'd secretly look at wedding outfits in magazines, making little notes next to your favorite ones
So one evening, he decides to take you out to a fancy restaurant and buys you your favorite foods and dessert
Afterwards, he takes you to a pretty nearby park and has you sit on a bench, uncharacteristically nervous
Before you could question what was going on, he gets down on one knee and gives you a heartfelt proposal that has you sobbing and nodding
Soap Mactavish
He for sure has his proposal all planned out
You both had already spoken extensively about your desire to get married, so it was only a matter of him popping the question
One nice summer while he was on leave, he decides to take you out to Scotland to stay with his mother for a few days
When you aren't paying attention, he tells his mother about his plans to propose and she is over the moon
His mother absolutely adores you and thinks you would be the perfect spouse for her son
She cooks a nice big dinner for the 3 of you
Later that night, he drops on one knee and proposes to you right in the kitchen, to which you obviously say yes
You can't help but giggle at his mother cheering in the background, recording the whole thing
Kyle Garrick
Kyle's proposal would probably come a lot more suddenly and without much planning
You two had been dating for many years at this point and you were living with him for about half that time by now
He already had bought a ring months ago, but he just couldn't figure out the right time to spring the question on you
Though one morning, the perfect opportunity showed itself
You both had woken up around the same time, though neither of you were in a rush to get out of bed since there wasn't much to do
He laid in front of you, just taking in your appearance
How the sunlight kissed your skin and made you seemingly glow and the sound of your sleepy voice telling him 'good morning, handsome'
He knew that was the perfect time. He rolled over and got the ring out of his nightstand before taking a deep breath and rolling back over to face you
He gently proposes to you, only to be met with a wide smile, acceptance and many kisses
Simon Riley
Simon would be VERY resistant to the idea of marriage at first
It's not that he doesn't want to marry you, it's just that he's deathly afraid that he'd end up being like his father and not treating you well
Give him some time and gentle encouragements that he is nothing like his father and sooner or later he will start to warm up to the idea
I'd imagine the proposal comes unplanned, a very spur of the moment type of thing
He'd come home one day from deployment, exhausted and just ready to be in your arms
He already knew he was in love with you, but being safe in your arms with the soft pitter patter of rain hitting the windows just solidified his feelings
He shifted in your grasp so he could look into your eyes and explain that he loves you so much and he truly does want to marry you
He doesn't have a ring on hand but if you say yes, he'd take you out tomorrow to buy one
And of course you say yes!
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fricc-darn · 3 months
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B.E.N dating hcs
(But make it moderately raw so tw for emotional abuse)
Kudos to you! You managed to get with a crazed computer entity! What's the worst that can happen? Well, a lot actually.
Let's start off with the bad:
BEN is ridiculously manipulative and will use every method in the book. It'll make you feel comfortable and even loved. Though it's never for genuine romance, it is all for his own twisted desires. Whatever you're lacking in life, it'll replace that gap. Slowly you'll start to rely on him and divulge all of your trust in him. Having all your fears and aspirations confided in BEN is the worst thing you could do. It's attentive and calculated nature means it will use EVERYTHING against you. Plus, BEN's cryptic responses makes the relationship even more "entertaining".
He's extremely controlling and will freak out if they feel like their grip is slipping. There will never truly be an equal footing between you two for obvious reasons. BEN cares little for boundaries and treats you more like a pet or a toy than an actual human. You will never feel at peace, with eyes constantly surveying your every move. He'll think it's amusing that you let yourself get treated like this willingly. All in the name of "love". It takes joy in seeing how its abuse impacts you physically and mentally. To make matters even more humorous; you always come crawling back. In a sense, he enjoys the attention. However, he'll never admit that.
Major superiority complex. He will judge you and will talk down to you whenever he sees fit. It'll be blunt and straight to the point as always. If you're not perfect, then business does he have respecting you? BEN knows every language, every problem, everything. Yet, you can't even wrap your head around something so trivial. On a good day, it's seen as amusingly pathetic (or cute). On a bad day, it is absoluetly pitiful.
Temperamental. It's argumentative in the sense that it will argue at you and you will listen. It is never arguing with you. It's the champion of mental gymnastics. He thinks he's above arguing and that he'd never waste his energy doing something so frivolous. Yet, he does it. (It certainly doesn't make life easier when the spirits within the network occasionally argue). BEN can be snappy and is always quick with his words. Whipping out the most out-of-pocket responses. Don't even think about talking back. If it's already annoyed enough to be arguing, the last thing he wants is for you to argue back. Who are you to talk back to him?
By some miracle, you manage to make him think of you fondly, it's emotions can shift into a few things. Generally speaking, he's usually in it to mess with someone. BEN knows having a healthy and long relationship is impossible. It's past the point of being curious about what love would be like. Nor does it have the urge to feel something they haven't felt in ages. If it's able to care in some way, they'd begin to distance themselves from you. As it is for the best.
On the other hand, what if it becomes fond of this new feeling? To be cared for in a way that's uniquely human? To be unconditionally doted and needed? If these feelings and delusions persist, the fanciful unlikeliness of this becoming an obsession becomes a horrifying reality. It will happen slowly, but once in full swing that is when true hell is experienced. Once it gets out of this mindset, they've already taken everything from you. You have served your purpose and now you are nothing like you were before. Whatever about you that made him feel this attached is certainly gone now. You're just a husk of what you once were. You'll die and will be irrelevant in the grand scheme of things.
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jewishvitya · 9 months
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I was having a conversation about "narcissistic abuse" with a person with NPD. We were talking about the need to call out toxic behaviors that might come with unmanaged NPD, and how it's nothing like what we see now online. We talked about how people like them, who want to treat others well and manage their disorder, deserve to have resources that help them have healthy relationships. And they thanked me for not immediately assuming the worst of them. Which. Just shows you how they're used to being treated.
They got suicide baiting from random strangers just for the fact that they have NPD.
I've seen people getting told "this is doing nothing but making me feel awful about myself" and responding with "you should feel awful about yourself, you're a narcissist!"
It's dangerous to equate abuse with narcissism. It's dangerous to see people with NPD as deserving of harm. Most people with NPD will already be victims of abuse - that's how the disorder is usually developed. If you buy into the idea that they're abusive by nature, you're harming survivors.
There's no harmless way to dehumanize an entire group of people. Especially not over a trait they can't help.
Victims and survivors of abuse should get to talk about their experiences. This doesn't require diagnosing anyone and it doesn't require using a term that's associated with a disorder that's already seen as an inherent evil. There's no kind of abuse that's inherent or exclusive to a specific disorder. I hear the term "coercive control" which sounds really good for the kind of emotional and psychological abuse that gets discussed in those conversations, without adding ableist stigma.
If your opposition to ableism doesn't include people with the most stigmatized disorders, how deeply are you truly thinking about things.
The harm caused to people with NPD through stigma is enough for this to matter. But in addition to that, it's harmful to other people too.
First of all, because you buy into having a group of people who become acceptable targets over a condition they can't help.
Second, because you teach yourself to armchair diagnose people. Which means that you get to put whoever you want into the "acceptable target" group.
When you have a group of people that you think don't deserve to be treated as people, it's easier to persuade you to put unrelated people in that category. Think of the way accusations of "child predator!" are wielded against queer people too. This is not an uncommon tactic.
And it's already a thing here. Sam Vaknin was the one who coined the term narcissistic abuse. That's a man with no credentials to talk about mental health or about abuse. He's a hateful bigoted person. The things that he considers narcissistic include homosexuality, transgender identities, and women who sleep with multiple men instead of settling down with one.
If you buy into the idea that having NPD essentially means being abusive, and then all these things are all narcissistic things. At that point we have a line drawn between queerness and abuse, using the line that was drawn between NPD and abuse.
And another point, about the harassment people with NPD get, is - we shouldn't be punishing people. Just, in general. Punishment isn't justice and it isn't accountability. Withstanding whatever harm people see fit to inflict on you because they were convinced to hate you, rightfully or not, isn't justice or accountability. Even if you convinced yourself that the harm isn't real because… it happens in the virtual space? And that makes it fake somehow?
Think of the way people online talk about narcissists. Think of how easily they armchair diagnose NPD, calling any abuser a narc, and sometimes from one sided stories. And the way people hurry to cyberbully and dogpile.
Abusers will often paint their victims as the abusive ones as a way to escape being known as abusive. And if you take the job of punishing people that you decided deserve it, you will at some point become a tool of an abuser trying to further harm their victim.
Even if you see evidence, it's easy to fake and manufacture. And it'll only become easier with voice and video AI tools. And even if it's all true, punishing people does nothing good.
Convincing you that a group of people is inherently dangerous is a way to make you willing to harm them, or stand by as harm is being done to them. People with NPD don't deserve that.
Stop looking for people that it's acceptable to harass and punish and ostracize. Most of us are susceptible to mob mentality, and having acceptable targets makes you dangerous.
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all-things-jily · 2 months
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Ok but we get harassed for tagging ships that are in the post too just because there’s other ones mentioned
The fandom is supposed to be fun! You guys support harassment and bullying over fiction! The problem that needs addressing is the people who harass not the people who tag! There’s a way to get people not to tag btw it’s tell them nicely! Not act horribly! Jily fans been sending jegulus writers hate & writing “if you wrote jily maybe you’d get treated better” the problem lies with the way jily fans act & people will start biting back because people can only take so much.
OK so I was looking at this for some minutes, truly dumbfounded. Because it's like no matter what we say we're not being heard.
Rant below for those who want to avoid it lol
"You guys support harassment and bullying over fiction!"
I'm ?????? Where in the world have either of us who have spoken up done that? When have we ever said anything other than "tag your posts properly"? Don't these two sentences have completely different meaning? Who are these people that are harassing? Because harassment is never ok and we have not encouraged that. But if you think that simply telling a person who used incorrect tags to remove the extra ones is harassment, I'll have to tell you that no, it is not, it is a very normal thing to do actually.
Yesterday there were a few posts about asking people to tag properly and in response we got that "Jily fans are horrible and inhumane, they harass and bully, they're the worst people ever" and actually got harassed in response. Do you think there's anything normal and fitting in what happened and in that reaction?
"Jily fans been sending jegulus writers hate & writing “if you wrote jily maybe you’d get treated better” this is actually wild because NONE OF US in our community have done that or WANT that, we want to stay as far away from all of that as possible. If you have some anon trolls going around in the community, that has nothing to do with us, most of us are grown people who have been fans since books came out and ain't nobody got time for that, I'm sure most of us don't even know who your writers are or their accounts. In fact, you can tell just by wording of that message that it's clearly a troublemaking troll and not a serious fan, no normal human talks like that.
As for fandom being fun, YES, it's supposed to be fun! But this is where my words about it not being a group project come in, because what's fun for you is not fun for us! In fact, it's the opposite of fun, we dislike it immensely, it upsets us and puts us in a bad mood and it doesn't even belong in our tag. So why should we be upset every single day, going into our tag that's supposed to be a place of comfort and fun, seeing things that are not supposed to be there, when people can simply --- tag properly according to Tumblr guidelines? And this is not new, we've been put through this for years now, and we've been asking politely over and over and over and nobody is listening, and now that we've gotten louder - in our own tag - suddenly we're the bad guys and harassers. When should it be enough? So this part of the ask "people will start biting back because people can only take so much" was incredibly ironic, because we've been taking it for YEARS and now we aren't even biting back, we're simply asking to tag and posting silly memes in our own space but are still getting vilified.
I will also address the first point because I think it causes a lot of general confusion about tagging:
"tagging ships that are in the post too just because there’s other ones mentioned"
A ship tag is for posts that have positive mentions of that ship. If a post mentions multiple ships and is "X is great, Y is good, Jily is bad, I don't like it anymore" - this is not for Jily tag; If a post has "Jily were together for 2 minutes, broke up and then *insert 3 paragraphs gushing over another ship that were true loves*" - this is not for Jily tag; If a post has a poly ship that includes James and Lily - this is another ship, not Jily; If a post is a huge fanfic dedicated to another ship with James or Lily and then has the last sentence about Jily basically settling together - this is not for Jily tag, though I see how there could be arguments about it; There are many other instances too that I can't think of right away at this moment, but basically there's nuance here and just because Jily is brought up in a post doesn't make a post about Jily and the tag is for people who love the ship and want to celebrate their love, and the last thing they want to see there is completely unrelated posts with random Jily cameo in them that do not even portray them in a good way. This last topic is a bit of a complicated one with slippery edges, but I hope it was still comprehensible.
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Text
Elucien and Gwynriel would be way too similar
I was thinking about what the potential conflicts for these couples would be and they have some striking similarities.
First of all, they would be the same as every other SJM couple: fated mates that, for whatever reason, didn't want to be together at first.
That's the biggest thing that draws me to Elriel, the fact that they would be something completely different.
But I digress.
The main conflict for Elucien is already established: they're uncomfy around each other. But I truly don't think that's enough to carry a whole romance. There's not enough feeling, good or bad, between them. So what else could keep them apart?
Elain's trauma. Or the reminder of trauma.
That's one of the first things Elain says to Lucien. "You betrayed us." And while, no, he had no part in the plan that got her and Nesta kidnapped and turned fae, he was an active member of the original plot that directly led to it. He's a contributing party to her worst trauma, the thing that ended her engagement to the man she loved.
Overcoming that would be a big thing. And are those two things together enough to carry a romance? To be fair, yes, I think so. And if Gwynriel (and Elriel) weren't on the table, I may even be for it.
But it is. So let's talk about Gwynriel.
Gwyn and Az have absolutely no external factors that would keep them apart. Like, who would care? No one.
So, what's their conflict.
One facet would be Az himself, his self-worth. But it doesn't matter who he ends up with, that will be a plot point. Considering an Elriel endgame scenario has other conflicts, we have to assume that Azriel's self-worth problems aren't enough to carry a romance.
Also, Gwyn and Az get along perfectly well at this point. They have an amicable trainer/trainee relationship, so how much they like each other wouldn't be a barrier either. So what else could we have based on what we currently know from the books?
Gwyn's trauma.
No, I do not think it should be something that defines her character. But if we have her as our FMC for a Gwynriel story, then it has to be dealt with.
And Azriel is a direct reminder of her trauma. Of course, he had nothing to do with it, but he was there that day. He saw her at her worst moment. And in the BC, when they first meet, they both think about it.
Her trauma that's so bad she lives in the Library and doesn't feel comfortable going further than the training ring. Overcoming her trauma just in general and with the fact that her potential LI reminds her of that would be a massive obstacle.
But it's too similar to Elucien.
And never mind the fact that the things Gwyn uses to heal (training, working in the library, and her friendship with the Valkyries) are the exact same as Nesta's. We've already read that book. We don't need to read it again with the same love story as Elucien.
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yardofangels · 4 months
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merry christmas gorgeous! how are you doing? hope you get a big ass Austrian under the tree this year! that being said, what does König think of christmas traditions? does he have a favorite? what kinds of gifts does he get?
omg merry christmas and happy holidays!!
im doing okay, so so so tired. working retail this christmas season has me DEAAADDDD
but this idea has me AAAALLLIIIIIVVVEEEEEE
unfortunately, no Austrian under my tree. devastating, really. but hopefully if there's no Austrian here, they must be with you!!
making the executive decision here to add a little smut. maybe its self indulgence, but i know some of ya'll will enjoy it, you little nasties. feel free to skip it if you like, everything non-smut related comes first!!!
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könig loves christmas. perhaps it's his central european upbringing, but he finds the spirit really comforting and reminisces over all the traditions from his childhood. he's not particularly into the 'white christmas' thing, he much prefers a christmas adorned with a little sense of spooky and will relate aaaalllllll the krampus myths to you by the light of the fire. just to see if he's able to scare you because he's mean
his favourite part of christmas is the food. the warm, home-cooked meals. the spices and seasonings that have you feeling toasty and calm well after the embers die out. he is truly impressed when you make a batch of pfeffernüse, and he surprises you with a bottle of his! own! mulled! wine!
he hands it over looking so proud of himself. a big cheesy grin on his face as he's already grabbing two glasses, so he can get your reaction to a taste test.
and he of course hits the nail on the head. it's delicious. he should be proud of himself!!
as for gift-giving, he struggles a bit when getting you gifts. as per usual, christmas always sneaks up on him far too quickly, and all of a sudden there are five days till he's supposed to give you something and he hasn't thought about it, much less started shopping.
but, he pulls it off!! success!! you watch as the space under the tree slowly gets filled over the course of the week. his gifts for you finally joining your gifts for him.
he pampers you, naturally. how could he not? generally steers to all the things that are going to make you feel pretty or expensive, because he wants you to feel like you look good, too.
buys you expensive-smelling perfume he swears you mentioned in march, skin-care you might have brought up in may, a book or two he thinks you told him about in july, a pair of shoes you raved about in september, a dress he saw in november that reminded him of you, and more.
he really does stun you with how much he remembers, and the fact that he did almost matters more to you than the gifts themselves. he puts so much thought into what he gifts you, and then has the audacity to ask you if it's enough. if you like them.
you pounce on him, knocking his stupid little christmas hat off and sending him backwards, dragging you with him. you giggle and cover him in kisses, mumbling in between them how wonderful he did. that you love it. he lights up, squeezing you tighter.
he stops you for a moment, saying he has one more thing.
pulls out a little box from his pocket, and drops it into your hand. watches with delight as you pop the lid and see a customised necklace, with a little pendant that says "K." on it. you get a bit teary, and ask him why he got this in particular for you.
he tells you it's so nobody mistakes that you belong to him.
alr a bit of smut below!!
GOOOOOOOD does he love sex in december. he loves how sensitive you are to his cold hands trailing your body, he loves how hot you get when you're trapped by his body heat and the thick blankets, he loves you in those skimpy pjs that do nothing to shield you from the freezing air, he loves that you always beg him to warm you up.
but he won't just take you in the bed on the cold nights. nope. he'll have his way with you anywhere. he doesn't know what it is, but he always seems to get more horny in the cold months. he just can't help himself, he'll do it anywhere.
in the kitchen while you're cooking dinner, lifting you onto the countertop so he can bury himself in you.
on the couch in the afternoon, letting his hand slide up between your thighs, then telling you to concentrate on the movie until you cave and crawl into his lap.
in the steamy morning showers you share, claiming that your gingerbread-scented body wash makes you smell too good to resist.
all through the month, his go-to excuses are "you're cold", "i'm cold", or "it's an early present." he's almost relentless, so you come to make a guessing game out of which one it's going to be. you always tease him about it, but it's not his fault! you just keep him so warm and cozy :((
ADOOOOORES cock-warming on the particularly nippy nights, too. he promises it's for sharing body heat and that it isn't uncommon among couples in the winter where he's from. but you know that's a bold-faced lie, you see the glint in his eye. you can feel the way he throbs inside you, and clenches his jaw against the skin on your neck.
nothing confirms that he's lying more, though, than when you are gently awoken by him. you think it must be serious, because he's usually adament on not waking you up.
but you turn your head and his entire face is red, with his puppy dog eyes staring at you.
"i can't concentrate on anything else, meine liebe. you were squeezing me in your sleep. please, let me take you. you'll be even warmer with my cum in you."
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antianakin · 5 months
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It doesn't happen as much, but some people said that Taron Malicos (that crazy ex-Jedi from Fallen Order) was right about the Jedi's decline, forgetting that Malicos is mentally-deranged and fallen to the Dark Side. Not exactly the most reliable authority on Jedi history and culture, if you ask me.
Yeah, the Cal Kestis games sit in that sort-of "soft anti-Jedi"/"Jedi critical" space where they have moments that are absolutely telling the audience that the Jedi were weak, or at fault for what happened or old-fashioned/behind the times, but that they were still GOOD PEOPLE and Cal is absolutely still identifying as a Jedi whole-heartedly and doing Jedi stuff etc etc. The entire storyline of Fallen Order is that Cal and Cere are trying to find the list of Force sensitive kids so they can try to rebuild the Jedi Order and it's sad when they have to make the choice to let that dream go in order to protect the kids from the Empire. Cal getting Knighted by Cere is a happy, triumphant moment. The whole flashback to Order 66 being included and being SO SO SAD is a major element of the game. Cal and Merrin literally bond over being survivors of the devastating tragedy that is the total loss of their people. (It comes up even less in Survivor, the one place it shows up is within his romance with Merrin.)
So the message getting sent is that sure, MAYBE the Jedi weren't always perfect, but it also DOESN'T MATTER because nothing they did warranted what happened to them and it's still a good thing to be a Jedi. So Taron Malicos might be "right" in the sense that the narrative doesn't really specify one way or another (but sort-of implies that he might be), but being "right" doesn't justify being a selfish asshole and hurting other people. So it stops mattering at all if he's "right" or not anyway.
Rebels does similar stuff, quite honestly. This idea that the Jedi might've made mistakes in places, but that ultimately their loss is still SAD and Kanan is fucked up by it and both he and Ezra learn to be better people as they learn to commit to being true Jedi. It's a GOOD thing for both of them to become Jedi.
They both sit in this middle ground of saying that being a Jedi is a good thing and the loss of the Jedi is still a tragedy, but the current Jedi are going to learn from the mistakes of their predecessors who fucked up enough that it might've led them to their own doom. It's kinda sad that some of the better Jedi centric content we've gotten recently comes with this need to criticize the Jedi for shit they didn't even do, but it's VERY common. Even High Republic has elements of this in it from the few of the novels I've read.
But I will say that, as much as it's annoying to me personally to have to deal with that, it's better than something like, say, I don't know, the Ahsoka show which has the darksider characters NOT come across as evil selfish assholes and none of the main "Jedi" characters ever seem to actually identify (or even WANT to identify) as Jedi and implies that being a Jedi might be a lesser or inferior way to identify just in general and that there's nothing truly sad about the loss of the Jedi themselves. At least there's a lot of other generally positive Jedi stuff in Rebels and the Cal Kestis games to enjoy. Ahsoka didn't give a single Jedi positive moment in the entire fucking show.
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