#like. a blob. of my former self

[eff-exor]

post flopped, killing myself is scheduled for dawn

[despairat6oclock]

Merry Christmas, Please don't Call

GN! Reader x ChrisMD

Synopsis: Former lovers rekindle on a lonely Christmas Eve

Word Count: 1.0k~

Contains: angst + fluff at the end if you squint

Warnings: Usage of the term "Y/N", drunk Chris, kinda cringey bear with me

[m.list]

Chris and I had broken up after being together for close to an online documented decade. Why? It seemed neither of us actually knew.

After the breakup, I had decided to find a place close to your old one in central London. As I was just as much in the content creating space as my past lover.

The summer has been hectic, having to find my own footing, pace, and peace alone. Finding peace within oneself was proving more difficult than any self-help book led on.

Tonight was the eve before Christmas, marking it off my calendar with a sigh. The snow falling upon the pavement outside marking it too late to go back home now. I wanted to avoid the bombarding questions I was sure to be met with anyways.

Mixing the last bit of the cookie mixture that would only serve one, a bottle of red wine close by. Its contents dip hidden below its wrapped label.

A sigh slipped past between my lips as I pulled my phone out of my apron pocket. Snapping a picture of the messy scene laid out in front of me for my Instagram. Putting the background music to the first Christmas song that popped up without much care before uploading it to my story. The array of notifications laid out neatly on the top of my phone piqued my interest. With comments from multiple media apps as well as a plethora of text messages from hours ago. One specifically catching my eye.

Not putting any meaning to the message before typing a simple corresponding message in return, no need for animosity.

Going back to my batter mix, setting the few doughy blobs into a tray and into the oven before leaning back and admiring the sight of my goods baking before the reverb of a knock on the front caught my attention with a slight jump in surprise.

Upon opening the door, I'm met with a flushed face, glassy eyed Christopher. With his hair disheveled and arm resting against the door frame as he panted erratically.

“Chris?”

I asked in confusion, head tilted while stepping aside just enough that if he wanted he could come in, he could.

“Please don't push me away.”

He practically pleaded, his free hand in front of him moving with his words.

“Are you ok?”

“I don't know."

Gesturing him with a simple hand gesture, “Please come in, you reek of alcohol.”

Stepping into my flat for the first time, being aware enough to close the door behind himself. Feet planted at the entrance as he took in the sight of the place decorated in a way that he knew was distinctly me.

Meanwhile I was back in the kitchen, fetching a glass of water I knew the man needed.

Hand on his back as I lead his swaying feet to the couch, forcing the glass into his hand.

“What brought you here?”

I questioned softly as I took a seat beside him.

“I actually don't know, I was supposed to be heading home with George."

“Should I call you a car?”

“No no, I'm good,” he spat out behind his water.

I nod, getting up to check on my cookies. If he didn't know why he was here, then he should be on his way soon.

“Do you have any plans?”

He speaks up as I walk away.

“For tomorrow?”

Chris hummed in approval.

“Not much, probably just an evening in.”

“Me neither, we should get breakfast.”

Giving a quiet laugh at his rushed words as I pulled the cookies out of the oven.

“Would that be appropriate?”

With a shrug and a smug smirk, I offered him more water. Which he gladly accepted.

“I like your place.”

“Thank you.”

“This couch used to be ours,”

He commented as he rubbed the cushion, a quick flicking grimace marked my features as I put my oven mitt back onto its pin.

“A lot used to be ours.”

Assuming the alcohol was now speaking for him rather than his brain, I continued my work around the kitchen.

“I had a lot of plans,”

He continued, still mindlessly messing with the fabric of the couch.

“I had a ring. Have. I have a ring. It was supposed to be your Christmas present.”

Eyes glancing at him from afar in intrigue and a bit of forced disinterest as I sip at my wine.

“i still carry it around with me, as if there would still be an opportunity for me to propose”

The ruffle of him reaching into his pocket and the click of the ring box opening was enough for my eyes to widen as I continued hiding in the kitchen as he continued his drunken rant.

“I don't even remember why we broke up, but I know it was my fault. Something about growing as a people. I was so ready to marry you.”

The sight of him gazing down into the velvet ring box like a sad puppy was enough to make me sigh and the darkness crawl back into my chest.

“Chris, you're gonna regret this in the morning, I'll call you a car.”

Tugging my phone back out of my pocket, I was quickly met with slurred protests.

“No please wait, a few more minutes.”

“Chris-”

“Please Y/N.”

Hands on my shoulders as I surrender to his defense. Shoulder sagging down with my head as it lays on the edge of his shoulder.

“You aggravate me.”

A chuckle that just screams he's smiling escapes his lips

“I know.”

“You should really go.”

Picking my head up to look up at him, his blue eyes meeting mine.

“Just a few more minutes, please.”

But this time instead of a plea, it was a smile and arms sneaking around my own. It wasn't much of a hug, but it still left his pinky rubbing the side of my palm.

“Just a few more.”

I nodded, trying to fight back a smile that matched his dorky grin.

Those few minutes turned into hours, and those hours turned into a night.

A night spent reminiscing under fairy lights and the background sounds of cliché Hallmark movies.

The snow didn't keep either of us in, but that would be the excuse used the next day when either of us were questioned the next day.

That Christmas Eve wasn’t spent with a lover, but the underlying feelings were more than a friend.

A/N:

This is my first bit of writing on here, so I hope you enjoyed it if you made it all the way down here!

I always accept advice, and even requests.

Cheers!

[vulpixisananimal]

[A: 4 C: 74]

(Ramos) [Alex] {Nihil} |Jasmine| <Altiare>

“Alright.” [You click your pen and place it down.] “Let’s start.”

[Yourself, Odile, Mirabelle, Rosmarinus. Today you were going to attempt to sort out whatever was going on with their sadness. You had already checked up on Odiles sadness multiple times through the weeks; it acted as a sort of control group for your tests. Folie á Deux was both contained and untamed, so it could be safely poked at. However, Refoulement and Mal du Pays were tamed.]

[The former had been much more aggressive than the latter, but that made some sense to you. Siffrin had worked with Mal du Pays for much longer, and had more experience in managing a mindspace.]

“W-who should be first?” [Mirabelle asked, looking between Odile and Siffrin.]

“I’ll check with Foul first, I think.” [You write something down.] “Then I will check with Mal.”

“What about Odile.” [Asks Ros.]

“I’m here to take notes and observe.” [She huffs.] “You would not catch me dead missing this.”

“H-haha, fair.” 

“. . . Alright, if there are no other questions. . .” [Heads shake around the room.] “Good. Mirabelle, hold still.”

[You move over to where she was sitting, and took a breath. You held up a hand to her head, and placed your palm on her temple. Think, focus, and speak it. Focus, focus, and explore. . . Expand. . .]

[The world melts away into a soup of shades. It’s abstract, a white void with floating items, blobs, blurs, and other assorted shapes. You have a very faint memory of being here before, not yours, Ramos’. You float over to one of the many blobs and touch down. The texture feels like sand.]

“Floating shapes, many colors, abstract. The one I’m standing on, it feels like sand.” [You say aloud.]

[You feel a tingle, a sense of aggression. You dodge to the side in time to see the sharp, rapier-like arm of Refoulement stab where you once were. Relax, Foul, I’m a friend.]

{NOT. LIKELY.}

[Yeah yeah yeah. You put your hands up. Come on, I know you’re the puppyguard of Mirabelles mind right now but relax.]

{PROOF?}

[I’m Headmates with Ramos?]

{. . . COULD STILL BE DANGEROUS.}

[Hey! That’s a dangerous horror trope and you know it.]

{SAFFRON. MAL DU PAYS.}

[For the love of- they’re not EVIL! Saffron has a bunch of stuff going on and Mal is being affected by the same blinding thing that’s affecting you!]

{. . .}

[What are you here for, anyways? I wouldn’t think Mirabelle would have any kind of-]

{IDIOT. FOOL. STUPID. MIRABELLE HAS ANXIETIES. FEARS.}

[I know that!! But, well, crap nevermind she did save the country.]

{ALWAYS ASKED TO CHANGE. ALWAYS ASKED TO DO MORE. MORE. BE GOOD. DO GOOD. GIFTED CHILD. SO GIFTED, AND TOLD SHE WOULD BE GREATEST, NEVER STOOD UP FOR WHAT. SHE. WANTS.}

[. . . Alright, my bad, I’m sorry.]

{GOOD. SHE DOES NOT WANT CHANGE. BUT CHANGES BY NOT WANTING TO. AND CHANGES WHEN SHE DOES NOT. AND SUCH CHANGE CAUSES DOUBT OF THE SELF. I CUT THOUGH. I HELP TELL HER WHAT. SHE. WANTS.}

[. . . Sounds complicated. So what, she does whatever you say?]

{IT IS JUST A SUGGESTION.}

[Okay, fair. Are we good now?]

{. . . YOU FOUGHT PERCIVAL. YES?}

[Uh, yes?]

{SHOW ME.}

[. . . Hmm, you’ve never tried doing this before, but of course it was theoretically possible. You focus. . . It would be like, taking a small plant, a grape, a single grape, from your garden. You pluck one and throw it to the sadness. Try this?]

{PIERCE THE GRAPE. JUICE. MEMORY. FEEL IT. RUSH. . . . . . HA! HA!}

[HAH! You knew that feeling, the rush, grabbing that bastard's head and smashing it on the table. Satisfying?]

{VERY!}

[Good! Now that you’re not worried about being attacked again, you speak up.] “Refoulement is on high alert. Thought I was a danger. Convinced I’m not now.”

[You don’t catch the response, something along the lines of “good” but you’re too focused. So! Foul, can I call you Foul?]

{FOUL IS. FINE.}

[Foul it is! So, someone’s going around making peoples inner sadness’ go haywire, but I think you knew that. So, well. . . What, did it feel like?]

{. . . INSTINCT. LIKE A CROCODILE SNAPPING AT A LEG. A FLYTRAP CLOSING ON A FLY. A SADNESS, DRAWN, TO, KILL. NOT KNOWING WHO IS FRIEND, AND WHO, IS FOE. FELT. TERRIBLE.}

“Foul describes it, like, an instinct. An instinct flaring up. Not knowing who’s good and bad. And it didn’t like it.” [You wander around, checking the rest of the headspace for mind craft. Anything else? Any kind of, voice?]

{NO. SUDDEN BURST OF, VIOLENCE. UNSTOPPABLE INFLUENCE. IF NOT FOR MIRABELLE BEING. . . MIRABELLE, SHE, MAY BE DEAD.}

[Hah! Yeah she’s kinda amazing.] “You helped keep it grounded, Mira.” [Anything else?]

{. . . . . . MIRABELLE WISHES TO TALK ABOUT RELIGION WITH YOU. OR ALTIARE. OR BOTH.}

[HAH! Really? Oh let me guess, she’s been too anxious to bring it up?]

{CORRECT.}

[Yeah, I thought so. There’s no mind craft at work here, so I’ll leave you now. Behave, okay?]

{YOU. AS. WELL.}

[You take your hand back from Mirabelle and shake your head.] “Stars. . . You’ve got a hellova head on your shoulders Mirabelle.”

“U-uh, thanks?” [She replies uncertainty.] 

“It’s a compliment.” [You smile, and stand up.] “Also, Refoulement said you wanted to talk religion sometime?”

“W-what?!?” [She jolted to attention.] “I-I mean, I do I just, um, got, nervous.”

“Are those meds. . . Working?” [Rosmarinus looks over, concerned.]

“Y-yes!!” [Mirabelle holds her hands close.] “I-I was so much worse before!!! I know I was because I wouldn’t even think about doing something like this and let someone into my head again after meeting Perci so I KNOW it’s working.”

“Not well enough, maybe.” [Odile chuckled.] “An increased dose may be in order.”

“You did save the country after all.” [You smirk, walking over to Ros.] “Wouldn’t be surprised if that made you even more anxious. Now, Mari.”

“R-right.” [She pauses, takes a deep breath, releases, then nods.] “Ready.”

[You place your hand on their forehead, focus, and. . . A moment later, you’re there. It’s easier than Mirabelles, her headspace doesn’t really exist, that’s just not how her brain works. But Rosmarinus and the others have a very solid sense of the inner world. That makes for an easy entrance.]

[You step down onto a high up black sand dune that, from this height, is more like a cliff. Long beach grass swayed at your side, and the sea-breeze air filled your nose. It was like nothing you’d ever smelt before. Whatever their headspace was based on, the sense-memory of it was crystal clear. Stars, even the touch of the grass was, real. The sound of the beach, the stars in the sky. . . . It made you want to just sit down and take it all in.]

+Over here, Alex! You step over from the favor tree. Alex was standing in the grass a few meters away. Are you alright?+

[Oh! You turn around. So THAT’S what Rosmarinus looks like here! Cool! Sorry, I’m fine, it’s just so. . .]

+Familiar?+

[I was going to say pretty but, yeah. You look around the beach. A favor tree stood at the peak of the dune you were at. As you approached, you saw a wooden ladder bolted in that headed up. So this is where the magic happens?]

+Pretty much! You chuckle, and sit down at the tree. You sit here to be at front, and if you want to go to people's rooms you follow that path down and they’re embedded in the cliffside!+

[Wait, you all get your own rooms?]

+You don’t?+

[You shake your head. We each have our own segment of the garden that we stay in. I’m by potted plants and roses watering them, Jasmine works on the garden boxes, Altiare stays in their covered gazebo playing cards, Ramos trims bramble bushes, and Nihil stays in its well.]

+Heh, Altiare sounds like a lazy-bones. You’re all doing work! Same with Nihil, but it gets a pass.+

[Oh Altiares got the biggest job now, keeping unwanted visitors out! Even if we haven’t gotten any lately. You sit down. Oh, and Nihil helps a little, it gets water for Jasmine.]

+Aww! Cute!+

[Very. So! May I chat with Mal?]

+RIGHT! You turn and start down the path. Stay here, this takes focus.+ 

[Oh you felt that. You watch them go, then lay back. Stars. . . It was a very beautiful headspace, really, it seemed so. . . Nostalgic? Homey? Something like that. Maybe this was what it was like where Eri came from. If it was then. . .]

[. . .]

[Nine, ten years ago, you came home from your lessons one day to find Eri sobbing and crying, collapsed on the floor. They kept trying to explain something, trying to talk to you, trying to show you something, but you just didn’t get it. You didn’t understand.]

[You took them to the doctors that day. You had to stay at the neighbors house for two weeks.]

[When Eri came back they didn’t talk for a while, and they didn’t smile, either. You were told to keep an eye on them, and make sure they didn’t do anything stupid.]

[You know why, now.]

{Alex.}

[You bolt back to attention. A few feet in front of you was a figure clad in Siffrins cloak and hat, but lightless, not darkless, with a veil and flowers to match. Mal du Pays?]

{That is I.}

[How have you been feeling? You stand up and step forward.]

{I am Fine. You make no motion. What am I?}

[That’s what I’m here to find out, buddy. You stop and look it over again. So, headmate or sadness, right?]

{Correct. Which one am I?}

[You mean you don’t know?]

{No.}

[. . . What do you want to be?]

{. . . . . I don’t want to be a shadow. I want to be a person.}

{I want to feel the sun without getting burned. I want to taste food without it reminding us of home. I want to tell Isabeau I love him. I want to keep those who are kind to us safe. I want to hurt. I want to be hurt. I want so much but I don’t know what to do.}

{When I first was me, when I first existed, I wanted nothing but to hurt Siffrin. He accepted me. I fell asleep, and then I was awake, not a sadness, but, me. Or maybe I always was me, and a sadness. Maybe I ignored what I was. Maybe I couldn’t believe it. Maybe I was always a fool. Maybe I failed so much as a protector because it was never in my nature.}

{I think, I just want to be me.}

[. . . Well there’s your answer.]

{Do not get philosophical with me. What am I?}

[Alright, alright. You walk back to the Favor Tree, and sit. Mal does the same. So, you were tamed by Siffrin accepting you and coming to terms with homesickness. After that you disappeared, only to reform in his mind as a headmate.]

[Maybe because of the trauma related to sadness, or the whole time loop thing, jostled your memory and self identity. You repressed yourself, and lived life like any plural person. Although. . .]

{What is it?}

[Well. . . Null was the 4th, right? Then if Loop really is the original Loop and not a factive, that would make him the first alter that wasn’t the result of some craft. Well, the first you can remember that is. Stars, Siffrin may never have realized he was plural if you and Loop weren’t there to. . . Crack their egg, as it were.]

{Egg. . . Crack?}

[Vaugardian term. It’s for when someone realizes something about themself that might have been obvious to others. Usually it’s about Changing. Heh, you could call the fact that you’re realizing you are a sadness a cracked egg!]

{. . . I see.}

[Anything else?]

{. . . Would it be alright?}

[What would be alright?]

{To be, me. To make myself into who I want to be.}

[Yes???? Of course??? You shuffled closer to Mal, reaching out, waiting for approval to touch it.]

{. . . You nod.} 

[You reach out and put a hand on its shoulder. It flinches. Mal, you’re in Vaugarde. As long as it doesn’t hurt the rest in the system you can do whatever you want.]

{. . . Thank you. You wait a moment before standing up. Feeling urges, strong, but can control, with help. Old feelings. I will not let it win. No voices, no sense of who, just an urge.}

[I see. Refoulement is the same.]

{Understood. You turn. Enough talking, go up ladder, Loop wants to talk to you. Do not tell family.}

[You shuddered at that last sentence, there was a cold kind of malice mixed into it as a warning. You watch it go, and when it’s gone, you turn to the tree. Looking up the makeshift ladder, you couldn’t see far. You start up.]

[You only got a few rungs up before a lightless hand reached through the branches and pulls you up.]

[Suddenly you’re at the treetop! The island surroundings of the headspace changed to a countryside with a small down around you, and a looming House of Change. Looking around, you see someone with a lightless body covered in stars with a blinding head to match. Loop?]

[. . . Well hello little Academic! You put a hand in front of your mouth and giggle. Welcome to our lovely little tree fort~]

[Yeah, that was definitely Loop. You chuckled, why did you want to see me? Was it about the whole KILLING one of our HEADMATES!]

[. . . Y-yes, but. . .]

[But? You squint at them.]

[. . . I, I would like to apologize to Ramos about that personally.]

[Oh well then they’ll be waiting all day for you. Stars. . . You rub your head. Then what WAS it, Loop?]

[. . . . I. . .]

[(. . .])

[You felt a presence nearby. Turning to look, it was Saffron. But, oh stars above, they looked horrible! What happened?!?]

[(. . . Talk, Stage Director.)]

[I was ABOUT to- You huff, looking away for a second before breathing in. . . And out. . . . . . . Alex. I. . . We have something to talk to you about. But you must not mention this to anybody.]

[. . You blink a few times, looking between Saffron and Loop. Anybody, hmm? What kind of secret would you have not to tell any of your party?]

[You have no idea. Don’t try to look for it, don’t try and ask about it, don’t try and pry it from our head like some HISTORIAN. You glare at her, deadly serious. Don’t even mention we had this talk! Lady Odile is FAR too observant, and would jump at the slightest hint of a mystery.]

[. . . She would. Alright, fine then. My lips are sealed.]

[Good! You clap your hands together. I’m not actually going to TELL you what our little secret is, but more just, a, a side effect.]

[. . . Okay?]

[(Good! If you tell them, I will loop us back. But not before killing you in every way I can think of. You think back to when you killed the Scholar. I’m not above it you know~)]

[You shudder. Message received. Okay, what is it?]

[. . . We have our own sadness.]

[. . . What? You stand up, the gears of your information obsessed mind beginning to turn. You have a sadness, but subsystems shouldn’t be able to have their own inner sadness.]

[(Why not?)]

[An inner or bonded sadness is tied to the willpower of the whole, even if it’s shattered into multiple personalities. But, you are your own person, correct? Put directly into Siffrins mind via wish craft.]

[. . .Yes, yes. Yes we are.]

[That’s not a secret though, so why. . . Oh. Because whatever it is, the others knowing would spoil said secret. Yes?]

[. . . You nod.]

[I see. In that case, I should come back at a time where no-one else is in the house. In that case, your secret will be safe no matter what. Sound good?]

[(. . . Fine.)]

[That works for now~]

[Alright, good. Is, there anything else I- SAFFRON!!!]

[STARS-]

[(You turn on a dime and jump, just in time to avoid that. Things. Grasp. You scramble back, bumping into Loop. That, that, t-that’s the thing, that’s it that’s the one that-!)]

[{Asking for help? You? How unlike you, Loop. No, you’re no doubt stalking your next prey. What will it be this time, beheading? Evisceration? Dissection? You want to, don’t you, it’s the only way you can feel alive.}]

[You stand defensively, looking at the, the thing in front of you. A sadness, no doubt. You step in front of Loop and Saffron. You’re a nasty piece of work, y’know.]

[{And you. Are. Dead. You reach out to grab the intruder.}]

[!!! You raise your-]

[You grab Alex. No, it’s time for you to leave, there wont be blood in our headspace a second time! You throw them off the tree.]

[You snap back to reality, shaking your head and wavering a moment. You felt dizzy, way, way, too, s-stars-]

“Alex? Are you alright?” [Odiles voice got to your ears.]

[You take a breath, then nod. You look up.] “I’m fine, just dizzy.”

[Siffrin? Was rubbing their head and shaking a little. They were breathing fast, before taking a deep breath, then looking up, smiling.] “I’m fine!”

 “Alright, good.” [You didn’t need to be psychic to know who it was, or why. You stand up.] “Mal is able to resist whatever’s affecting sadness better than Refoulement can, and is doing alright right now.”

“A-anything else?” [Mira asks.]

“. . . No.” [Saffron catches your eye.] “No that is all.”

[selfaware-bungou-stray-dogs]

Yukichi Fukuzawa (self-aware)

Self-Aware! Yukichi Fukuzawa x GN! Reader

Warning: Yandere. OOC. Spoilers for "The Untold Origins of the Detective Agency". Fukuzawa doesn't like you at first. Overprotective Fukuzawa. English is my second language.

Becoming self-aware

👘🗡️ Fukuzawa Yukichi is a stoic man. Fukuzawa Yukichi is a swordsman. Fukuzawa Yukichi was an assassin. Fukuzawa Yukichi was a bodyguard. Fukuzawa Yukichi is a President of the Armed Detective Agency. And, apparently, he never has been real.

👘🗡️ It takes everything for Fukuzawa not to lose himself.

👘🗡️ Was his previous life a lie? Were the lives of his workers a lie too?

👘🗡️ What about other Yokohama citizens? Are ADA members the only ones who gained self-awareness? Are they the only ones who stayed in this cursed place?

👘🗡️ Fukuzawa wanted to scream. He wanted to do something, anything, to stop this real life nightmare.

👘🗡️ But there is no point in grieving. ADA need him to be strong.

👘🗡️ Fukuzawa ordered everyone to travel in pairs. After taking a quick look at other floors and finding them empty, Fukuzawa ordered to move living quarters into the ADA building.

👘🗡️ The first day was hard. The next ones wasn't easier.

👘🗡️ Atsushi was afraid of been alone. Kunikida was a husk of his former self. Yosano was ready to destroy anyone who crossed her path. Junchirou put all his efforts in looking after Naomi. Naomi was avoiding all of them. Kirako was behaving like a robot. Katai was working day and night. Kenji tried to stay positive, but he also was lost. Kyouka was ready to become a killer again, if it helps the agency. Ranpo was working as much as he can. And, while each time he couldn't find something useful, Ranpo pretended not to be bothered by it, Fukuzawa still could see, that Ranpo became sadder and sadder. Dazai was aloof and closed off.

👘🗡️ Fukuzawa saw his workers distress. He could see their pain. And he can't do anything to ease their pain.

👘🗡️ He talked to them. Offered a shoulder to cry on. But it wasn't enough.

👘🗡️ He tried to be strong for them. But, time to time, he almost broke.

👘🗡️ The news, that they weren't the only one, who is self-aware, were... good. At some extent. At least, there were other people.

👘🗡️ And then, one day, he feels an entity's gaze on him.

___________________

It was watching...

It was observing...

It was not something familiar...

Years of training have sharpened Fukuzawa's senses.

They were sharp enough to observe The Entity in return.

Fukuzawa is patient. He is observing The Entity. He is waiting for its first move.

Fukuzawa was an assassin. He still remembers, how to follow his target. But he can't follow this target.

He trusts his guts and years of training. He is sure, that he is not mistaken. Fukuzawa was sure, that this thing isn't there. The Entity is hiding in a different world.

When Atsushi asked if they have felt someone's gaze on them, Fukuzawa answered, that he has felt it.

Others have felt it too. Their conditions became worse. Most of his workers became angrier.

All because of This Entity.

Fukuzawa is trying harder to find a way to The Entity. To this strange emotionless thing.

When he will find it, he will make sure this creature will be destroyed.

He won't let this thing poison his workers lives anymore.

And then time resets.

And Fukuzawa, once again, was thirty-two-years-old bodyguard, whose last client were assassinated.

________________________

When they start feeling your presence

👘🗡️ At first, Fukuzawa was just standing there. At first glance, he looked calm. But in reality, he was enraged, he was scared, he was lost.

👘🗡️ He felt The Entity's gaze again. But in a second, the ominous presence disappeared.

👘🗡️ Instead, he felt, like something was floating above him.

👘🗡️ Fukuzawa looked up. A blob of light. A small, shapeless blob of light. He can tell, that it is The Entity. Of course, it wasn't its real form. And he heard a voice. Just a whisper, that came from the blob.

"young..." "cool..." "strong..."

👘🗡️ Then blob gently lowered itself and settled on Fukuzawa's head. The Blob seems happy.

👘🗡️ And Fukuzawa felt its happiness. Fukuzawa felt, like he just drank some good tea.

👘🗡️ Okay... He didn't expect this. Fukuzawa was puzzled. This Entity has emotions? And it decides to become a light blob.

👘🗡️ Fukuzawa tries to touch the blob. But his fingers passed through it. And Blob doesn't seem to notice Fukuzawa's actions.

👘🗡️ Fukuzawa decided to go to the company of his late client. He needs to meet Ranpo.

👘🗡️ And like this, with a light blob on his head, Fukuzawa was on his way.

👘🗡️ When Fukuzawa arrived, he, once again, had to preform an impossible movement, just to get to the room with the caught assassin.

👘🗡️ Fukuzawa heard, that Entity spoked again. This time, the voice was louder, but not really clear.

"Fukuzawa [||||||||||] awesome! [|||||||||||||] bodyguard ever!"

👘🗡️ The Blob on his head purred. It was... cute.

👘🗡️ During the next few minutes, Blob, once again, was floating above him, above young assassin, above secretary, above Ranpo.

👘🗡️ Fukuzawa noticed, that, he was the only one, who can see the Blob.

👘🗡️ During their talk in a café, Blob were floating above them.

👘🗡️ After secretary's crimes were exposed, and Fukuzawa agreed to treat Ranpo, he asked, if Ranpo heard The Entity. Ranpo confirmed that yes, he has heard them.

👘🗡️ For the first time, since Fukuzawa learned about The Entity's existence, he felt calm. They... don't seem bad. Simply curious. Not malicious.

👘🗡️ Fukuzawa and Ranpo finally went to the theater, where Fukuzawa's next job should be.

👘🗡️ When he met Ranpo for the first time, Fukuzawa was so irritated by the child's behavior, he thought about fifty-one ways of getting rid of him. Fukuzawa hoped, that this time, Ranpo would be less annoying. He was mistaken.

👘🗡️ Not only Ranpo was as annoying as before, The Blob was laughing. The Blob seems amused by Ranpo's behavior. Fukuzawa felt exhausted.

👘🗡️ At the end of their walk, Fukuzawa had thought about thirty ways of getting rid of the Blob. And he proclaimed it loudly, pointing at it. Ranpo looked confused, but didn't ask any questions.

👘🗡️ When Ranpo was kidnapped, and Fukuzawa was looking for him, he could feel The Entity's worry and fear.

👘🗡️ When Fukuzawa was lecturing Ranpo, The Entity was also lecturing him

👘🗡️ The Entity were never evil... Fukuzawa was grateful, that he learned it before he can seriously hurt The Blob... Little Light.

👘🗡️ The time 'resets again'. Fukuzawa 'woke up' in the ADA office. Atsushi's entrance exam just ended a moment ago.

👘🗡️ Days passed. Slowly, others became back to normal. As Fukuzawa learned from talks, The Entity was praising them. They were crying with them. They were treating them like humans.

👘🗡️ And one more thing were new there.

👘🗡️ The Light Blob, that were floating above them. And, again, others didn't notice it.

👘🗡️ Now it didn't stay with Fukuzawa for long. He wished, that Little Light will stay with him longer. He wished, he heard their voice again.

👘🗡️ Ranpo has discovered, that Little Light is normal human.

👘🗡️ The next day, Dazai started a meeting in Fukuzawa's office. Dazai confessed, that he also can see Little Light Blob. If one feels Guiding Light presence long enough, they start seeing the Little Light Blob. Dazai offered to start working on finding a way to Their Guiding Light. That's how Dazai called them.

👘🗡️ Fukuzawa and the rest of ADA agree.

👘🗡️ ADA has decided to find a way to their world. So they can be near them.

👘🗡️ And then, Atsushi and Kyouka were kidnapped by Port Mafia again.

___________________________

"A comrade is in danger. We need to rescue him. Is there some weightier logic in the world which trumps that?"

Fukuzawa Yukichi felt, how Light Blob flew closer to him. He heard the voice.

"kind" "true leader" "everyone is safe with him"

"Fukuzawa, you are a great leader. All ADA members are safe with you. You will never let them be hurt. I think, they are very lucky to have such a kind and loyal man as their leader."

Little Light flew closer to Fukuzawa and pet his shoulder.

[In reality, you carefully pet the manga panel with Fukuzawa on it.]

______________________

👘🗡️ When Dazai offers to arrange a meeting between Fukuzawa and Ougai Mori, Fukuzawa agrees. They need more people. More people to find a way to Their Guiding Light.

👘🗡️ The meeting was a success. After hearing about working together with finding a way to the real world, to Their Guiding Light, Mori immediately agrees.

👘🗡️ Some time passed. The Guild joined them. And Rats. And DOA. And Hunting Dogs. And The Government.

👘🗡️ All of them were together. Joined their forces in finding a way to you.

And then, one day, during one of their meetings, the purple moon shined above Yokohama.

_____________________

When you installed BSD Mayoi Inu Kaikitan

👘🗡️ Fukuzawa will be the first, who will try to raise the chance of getting his card from the scout.

👘🗡️ Soon, you will have all your Fukuzawa cards with max level skill.

"This SR Summer Festival Fukuzawa card looks good"

"Wow, Fukuzawa's skill deals so much damage"

"I like when I see Fukuzawa's sprite in The Office"

👘🗡️ When BSD gang will gain access to the rest of your phone, Fukuzawa will find information about dangers in your world. He can't allow anyone to hurt you. You are under his protection. He is your bodyguard. He will keep you safe.

👘🗡️ Likes to look at cat videos, cat pictures and cat memes with you.

👘🗡️ Last time, he touched the Little Light, hie couldn't do it. But he will get this chance, when they will go to your world. He wants to touch your face. To feel, that you are real.

👘🗡️ Fukuzawa Yukichi was a bodyguard. And for you, he will become him again. Fukuzawa Yukichi is a President of the Armed Detective Agency. And he will use his authority to help you. And Fukuzawa Yukichi soon will be real. Others soon will be real. Real, as you are. Their Guiding Light.

________________________

You finally get a new Fukuzawa card. When you finish level it up, you saw a notification from the "Gift Box".

It was a note from Fukuzawa. With Awakening materials attached to it.

"[Y/N], I hope that you are safe. Please, be careful. The world is a dangerous place. I wish I could protect you. Fukuzawa Yukichi"

You smile and open Fukuzawa'd card again. You carefully pet sprite's shoulder.

"Thank you, Fukuzawa. I am grateful, that you want to protect me. Perhaps, one day, you could do it."

You didn't notice, that Fukuzawa's eyes shine with dangerous light.

[nightowl33art]

How To Make A Toxicsona- A Master Post!

!This page may update over time! So I was looking at my inbox and noticed I got sent an ask. Likely due to site bugs, I was not able to answer directly, but I'm sure the asker will be able to see this post.

Hello Anon! Firstly, thanks for the fun ask! Keep in mind this post will apply to most toxicsonas. I'll be using my own designs and process as examples. What I recommend does NOT have to be followed. In the end it's your design and it should be for fun most of all. I'm just presenting what the "ideal and average Phisnom toxicsona/toxic blob oc" should have.

For those tuning into this lengthy post with no idea what I'm on about, I'll be excerpting the toxicsona submission form Phisnom/Phil made for his toxicsona review streams. (Phil being the leader of the Toxic Cesspit community, though you don't have to be in it to make one if you just feel like it.)

(Despite "sona" being in the name, a toxicsona does NOT have to be representative of you! Toxicsonas can also be regular ocs!) Now to the advice!

1. READ UP!

Read the Toxicsonas For Dummies character guide! This image contains all the basic lore and traits for toxicsonas! What I say going forward may reference it. (Reading may also give you some fun ideas!)

You should also peep this from the toxicsona submission form:

In order to have a toxicsona you need* a:

Dark body for a base with accents (ie lines) that must be neon/brightly colored.

Mouth(s) with sharp teeth. Ideally will have at least one extra mouth somewhere on the form.

Unique pattern image for the body.

*You may not need it but it's more or less what makes a toxicsona a toxicsona. I'll be going over each point in detail later!

2. Purpose

What purpose will your blob fill? Are you creating an oc, a sona for yourself, or something else? This will affect what you create and how. If you have a preexisting design/sona you want to toss into the slime, reference off that design! Use what you know about that character/person to create this new form!

Starting from scratch? What I do is come up with a basic idea to concept off of! Think of something you want to design! If you need help, try using one of the countless idea generators out there or put your head together with others and see what you come up with! Moodboards, playlists, and Pinterest albums also serve well! Whatever type of brainstorming gets your inspiration bug flying, go for it!

Regardless, one thing to make note of is who was this design in life? Most blobs were once living beings. They all come from a liquid superorganism called The Substance. When a living being with a consciousness foreign to the slime (like a person) is absorbed into The Substance, it'll be spit out and reanimated anew if it has a strong will. Your blob must've been alive or had a connection to living things. Then it must have undergone some sort of transformation after making contact with The Substance. Asking who your blob was before the slime will be very helpful!

3. Body

You likely either have an idea of what your design will be, or you're jumping headfirst into the doing part. Either is okay! Everyone's process is different. If your design is based off a preexisting one, you're likely to make the new form into a similar shape. Some things to think about when coming up with a body:

A slime body is meant to reflect the ideal self. What are your toxicsona's ideal traits? If you're making a sona, what are YOUR ideal traits?

What were they when alive? Were they a feral stray cat? A human? You may want to stick to a shape that resembles their former appearance, especially if they are in denial of being a slime.

Who were they when alive? Did they like a certain animal a lot? Give them physical traits of said animal! Maybe your toxicsona wanted freedom, so they develop the wings they always envisioned. Maybe they believe they were a terrible person and so deserve the devil horns on their head. Were they two-faced? Give them two faces!

Is this the only form they have? Do I want to add a simplified blob form? Do I want to make a bigger/smaller form? If my character has an alter ego disguise, should I make a form for it?

(Most toxicsonas have a simplified little blob form, reflecting what they looked like at default after The Substance. They're super cute and puntable!)

How much mass do they have? The more mass a blob has, the more they have to work with physically, the more developed they are. What appendages have they formed with this mass? Many toxicsonas lack legs, including Phi himself, who is simply too lazy to use legs. Why your blob does/doesn't have legs can have a reason too!

What colors are they? Common dark colors for the majority of the body include black, gray, and dark shades of any given color (ex dark blue.) The neon can be just about any color! If the design is a sona, pick your favorite color(s)! Keep the color vibrant- it's supposed to stand out from the dark color! Your slime will always be surrounded by a dark/black outline around the very edge.

Where's the extra mouth(s)? The best designs have a mouth placed with thought, but not all are. Thoughtfully placed mouths have significance to the toxicsona. Scars/important wounds on their living body can become mouths. Perhaps if they were a gluttonous or starved person, you'll put a mouth on their belly to represent their hunger. If they're anxious about their mouth or general appearance, maybe it's hidden. (Ideally let the mouth be visible. It's visually appealing.)

(Dutch's extra mouth is on his back. Wings were always a big part of him, both appearance and story-wise, so the mouth emphasizes that. His wings come out of the mouth like tongues!)

Being a cartoonist, we're personally big on shape language and like to have designs with strong, recognizable silhouettes, but you do not have to do this.

Some advice on basics for drawing your slime!

Here's how I create the lineart, clothing coloring, and the outline that surrounds the blobs. (Some steps may be done at the same time or skipped entirely. This is the Nightowl 33 method so your mileage may vary.)

Draw lineart.

Alpha lock lineart layer. Recolor it to neon color.

Clip new layer on lineart. Color clothes black.

New layer for body color.

Move body color layer under lineart.

Color body colors. (I clip different clothing coloring layers on the main color layer. This main base color layer gets colored black when ready.)

Make a folder. Place all lineart, lineart coloring, and all body coloring layers in the folder.

Add a dark color outline in a layer beneath the folder. (I use the "stroke (outer)" tool in my art program, ibisPaint X.)

How I draw eyes!

Draw eye lineart.

New layer, clip on lineart layer, draw dark circle.

Layer sclera coloring under lineart layer.

Add pupil layer below lineart layer and above sclera layer.

(Coloration used to show different steps/parts of the eye!)

(Without the weird example coloring, your end result should look like this!)

4. Pattern

Much like how everyone has their own unique fingerprint, every toxicsona with a well defined identity develops their own unique pattern. Coming up with the right pattern is tricky! Patterns are made up of symbols, lines, or a combination of. They have a rhyme and reason to them. A pattern to the pattern, so to speak.

(Here's a bunch of example patterns, created by me (sometimes with the help of CrystalKleure), or Phil and StupidButterfly. Stare at them for a while and take some notes on what rhythms you recognize.)

For maximum appeal, your pattern cannot be too complex or simple! Try to select 2-4 symbols/lines to create your pattern. These symbols/lines should be thematically relevant to your blob. Ex: A spiderweb pattern for spider-themed toxicsonas, checker pattern for a blob that likes checkers/chess, a UFO for an alien slime, eyes for an angel slime or a slime that loves/fears being watched! (You may also want to reference off the emotion patterns if your blob is heavily associated with an emotion. Ex: sparkles for a very happy/excited slime!)

Feel free to pick basic shapes, like triangles and circles, for one or more symbols.

Create a few variants of your chosen symbols. Draw them big, medium, and small. Fill some of them, leave others empty/"hollow."

Patterns are seamless! This means when you apply a pattern to your toxicsona's clothing or body, it must be able to consistently loop! While you may wing it, below is a handy lifehack to easily make a seamless tiling pattern by @crystalkleure !

1. Draw a base design 2. Split that design in half, and arrange the two halves like this. [You might want to use guide lines/a guide grid to make sure the pixels line up in such a way that these two halves will stitch back together correctly, so they'd make clones of the base image again if you were to tile sets of these halves horizontally.] 3. Stitch the two halves together by adding more to the design 4. Split the image again like you did in step 2, except this time split the top and bottom apart instead of the sides. 5. Add more stuff to the design again, in any way that crosses the "seam" made by step 4 [where the top of the bottom half meets the bottom of the top half]. And if you lined up the pixels correctly while you were splitting and rearranging the chunks, you now have an image that tiles seamlessly both horizontally and vertically. The trick is just splitting an image into halves, swapping those halves' places, and then adding more to the image to hide the seam made by splitting and rearranging parts of it like that. Do it with the sides and you get a horizontally-tiling image, do it with the top and the bottom and you get a vertically-tiling image, do it with both the sides and the top + bottom and you get an image that tiles in all four directions.

Here's a speedpaint where I make a pattern using this method! While creating, double checking that your pattern looks good when looped is important! Don't forget to experiment with placements!

(Wow! What a cool pattern!)

Your pattern doesn't have to be insanely unique, hell you don't even HAVE to have one, but it's honestly better if you come up with one. There's no reason NOT to have a pattern unless it's for lore reasons, such as a confused identity or a mimic character. (Do NOT copy others' patterns and make them your own, especially without permission!)

(Phee, Pho, and Phum have the same default pattern as Phi because they're copycat scammers! They try to convince others they're related to Phi to get what they want.)

Gradient and pattern application!

Now you may want to give your slime a gradient! Gradients tend to appear on the lower halves of blobs but can be placed anywhere! Below is a guide to show how I apply the pattern and gradients to the body! While defaults apply to many toxicsonas, like Phi, they do not have to be followed.

Clip pattern layer over body color layer. (Pattern transparency default is 47%.)

New layer (add mode), place under pattern, clip over body color layer. Draw gradient. (Gradient transparency default is 40%.)

Alpha lock the pattern layer.

Airbrush the upper half pattern layer with the dark body color.

The pattern is often the same color as the neon lineart, while the gradient is often a darker version of the color.

(Weird bright green coloration used to emphasize the layers clipped onto it.)

(The finished gradient, sans weird example coloring, looks just like Phi's!)

Here's how to apply a pattern to clothing! Create a new layer with the pattern. Clip it to your base. (Pattern layers on clothes are usually somewhat transparent. The default is 65% but you can deviate.)

5. Outfit

Clothing is a HUGE self expression that extends to the world of toxicsonas! Blobs can harden mass they acquire, turning it into wearable cartilage clothing! Below are some tips but the bottom line is DESIGN WHAT YOU WANT.

Who they were before the slime often heavily influences their outfit(s). Ex, if your blob was a clown when alive, they may dress the same as a slime.

You'll often find the body pattern on the clothes, but you don't have to do this.

A popular addition to blob fashion is caution/hazard tape! While often black and yellow, feel free to deviate the colors.

(A bunch of fashionable slime outfits with caution tape themes that I made or had a hand in making!)

Phil does not like hoodies on toxicsonas but you can totally join the #hoodiesweep nation. (It would be super funny.) That aside, many do put their blobs in hoodies, so avoiding a standard hoodie is preferable if you want to make a super unique design.

You don't have to give your blob any clothes, especially if they're non-humanoid. Accessories are still recommended to personalize your design and make it stand out from an average ...whatever it is.

Unlike the rest of the slime body that has colored lineart, clothing almost ALWAYS has black/dark color lineart.

Any slime overlapping atop non-slime materials requires a black outline, including over clothing.

(While the consistency of this rule varies with established toxicsona art (ie Phi), I personally try to apply it as much as possible, even when slime overlaps slime. It makes things look nicer and allows the neon lines to stand out more. It's also easier to make out what's going on when looked at.)

Misc. tips!

Bananas are the main unit of measurement in the cesspit! Giving your blob a height can help people draw them to scale, especially when drawn next to other blobs! To get the accurate height: 1. Conjure a length of your choice. 2. Convert your length to inches (in). 3. Divide the inches by 7. (Because 7 inches is the average length of a grocery store banana.) 4. Congrats! You have banana height! Now you can also reverse the order and get standard heights!

Too gay or lazy to do math? Click here for faster conversion! http://bananaforscale.info/#!/ (Note the results will be slightly shorter than my method above but the measurements are about the same so who really cares about that.)

Come up with a backstory for your toxicsona! If you haven't already made one during the design process, you may want to now! -Consider what life was like before they came in contact with The Substance. How did they feel about their old life? -How did they come in contact with The Substance? (Preferably avoid the basic backstory of accidentally falling into a vat. It's overdone, mainly due to how vague lore was before the toxicsona review streams. I'd suggest letting Phi lure them into the slime or tossing them in, if you want something traditional. Phi's goal is to make a blob army, after all.) -What is their life like now, post-Substance? How do they feel about their new life?

(Canon backstory comic on how Phee, Pho, and Phum became blobs!)

Feeling social? Working with other cesspit members (or your own ocs), you can develop links between your toxicsonas! Make your friend's blob their friend! Or maybe enemy! Why not ship them? GO NUTS????

(Phee is a massive flirt in the cesspit. Mr. Sex/Noctus belongs to @corovusin !)

-Consider how your blob may feel about others. Are they a social butterfly or a shut in? Who do they like? Who would they rather avoid? -What are their thoughts on Phi, the leader? (Generally avoid giving them a super strong, personal bond with Phi, such as relatives, best friends, or close partners of any kind. Phi does not have a family and she's a total bitch to just about everyone!) -Phil says there's no love in the cesspit but he's literally just a hater. Make your ocs gay kiss!!

Feel like cooking a little more? Why not design a pre-slime form if it doesn't already exist?

(Phee and Phum before their fatal scam attempt on Phi.)

Many cesspit users also create a "living disguise" form for their toxicsonas, so the slimes can wander among others without rousing suspicion! Blobs have the ability to learn to shapeshift. It's a skill that must be mastered with experience and time, so disguise forms often have "flaws" that give away an inhuman quality, like extra mouths, eyes, patterns, or gradients on their skin.

(Dutch is very good at shapeshifting, so his disguise lacks most flaws. The flaws that are there are mostly intentional, since he's proud of his slime qualities. A blob who perfects the skill of shifting can look like an ordinary human, but where's the fun in that?)

Most toxicsonas can change color based on emotion. (They may also change based on other factors so feel free to get creative with it.) -As a slime has a base pattern and color of choice, these will change based on their mood and that mood's assigned color! Many toxicsonas share patterns and colors with Phi (like red and triangle pattern for mad, blue and flowered squiggles for sad, etc.) but this is not a rule. You can assign any color to any mood. You are not limited to Phi's emotion set either! You can even make your own patterns for your blob's moods if you feel like it! -Some color changes are very subtle in some slimes! Is this true for yours? -Modifying the design of your blob to match their mood is a fun way to create expressive and interesting variants!

(Dutch's hair, horn shape, halo, face, and hands can change with his mood! He has an array of emotional patterns, both preset and custom-made, to match the different colors/moods.)

(When Goober was alive, they had DID. Mimicking the behavior of their former life, the three alters, Ziggy, Skrunk, and Wumbus, became separate blobs. They still need to work together to function properly. They combine to bodily become "Goober." Goober's left eye functions as a collective eye, while their right eyes that can emote separately reflect their respective alter.)

(Goober's default color is green, indicating all alters are co-fronting. When there is a primary fronter or two, the upper body color changes to match!)

Design a shell for your toxicsona! Shells are foreign objects blobs use, often to live, sleep, or hide in. Shells are protective. ANYTHING can be a shell. Not all toxicsonas need one, but those that do often have a thematic shell that relates to who they are. (Ex: Phi-barrel, Bucket-bucket, Collette-chocolate box.)

(Thanks to his angelic theming, Dutch's shell is a reliquary- a display container for holy relics, often being remnants of holy figures. Goober's shell of choice is a mini UFO!)

Stuck? Want to grow your design with less work? Collaborate with others or take their advice if you like what they give you. Ask people what they'd change about your design!

You should NOT be designing just for the approval of Phisnom, You should design for YOURSELF (or whoever is paying you- I see you, adopt/custom ppl.) He's just another person out there. Yes, a creator of the species, but he does not have to dictate your choices or give your design an S tier ranking just to validate it. The satisfaction should come from inside, not outside.

Hope these tips help, best of luck creating your own toxicsona, and feel free to ask any additional questions regarding this! ✌️ Open to suggestions/new info on this post too, just send it my way

[z-nightshade]

Born to is kind of a stretch because I've omitted a lot of if not all the weird stuff. For example, the pumpkins that were shaped like amorphous blobs with hooves narrating the whole thing in old greek with a posh accent

Also, as to why Cass was lowest on my top 3 list of likely cults is because they're so painfully human. They've got huge, glaring flaws (hypocrisy, self-esteem that's down in the dumps ECT.) They are relatable, with their only "deifying" characteristic is their boundless kindness.

You can't even say it's their foresight because metas exist.

In conclusion, Cass is Gotham's adopted stupidly kind child in my head.

As for the other two (usopp and buggy)...

They'd probably be able to accidentally manipulate entire armies, i don't think a cult would be an issue

Anyway, Harley, Buggy, Mihawk and Ivy would drag Bruce to their "talk shit about our exes and old coworkers" club

And Bruce can't even protest since crime rate is at an all time low, thanks to the Joker being out of the picture, the cropping up of more crime lords who aren't actually evil and are allying with the Red Hood, RichPeopleNotBeingAssholes™ (vivi, the Waynes..), and the Strawhats.

Cass is very glaringly human, but Cass is also, like, extremely private with their thoughts and feelings. The readers don't get to see it as much because we're 1. Primarily in Cass's head and 2. See Cass with Luffy most of the time, who they are extremely open with. But Luffy (and the rest of the crew) are outliers.

I'd say Gotham wouldn't see a lot of Cass's more human flaws out in the open. The Rogues and Bats do, but the average citizen? They'd likely just see this extremely competent, kind and supernaturally knowledgeable person going around helping people.

Honestly, Cass could probably pull of being Gotham's little meow meow adopted child and one of their deities at the same time. Like, yes, that is Gotham's resident future teller god thing, that is also Gotham' specialist little boy right along side Brucie Wayne and his army of children. Yes, Cass constantly kicks ass and protects people, Gotham would also go to war if anyone made them cry.

It probably wouldn't be the weirdest thing in Gotham and I feel like the mass of so many different seemingly ccombating things fits Cass well

I think Jimbei should also be allowed to join the "talk shit about our exes and old coworkers" club by virtue of being a former warlord. You can't tell me he doesn't have shit to say about Doffy and Moria

SPEAKING OF WARLORDS

Bonney and Kuma retire in Gotham and live happily ever after. I'd say I don't make the rules but I actually do so

[dex-starr]

I had a deep convo with my best friend last night and like it’s helped me think on some things.

Alright so the big challenge I’ve been facing involve the concept of identity in so many ways. Like I never wrestled with my sexuality bc that shits just concretely clear where I go in the spectrum. My expression though? That’s always been the part where I personally feel like an amorphous blob that can present as “male” due to others convenience and do “male” things sexually but that’s just because that’s ascribed to that. Since like… my behavior is tied to whatever the fuck that definition is. But there’s so much more to me than just that, if I had the chance to present in a way I’d like I’d totally do the flamboyant villain garbs.

This leads me to who I am with people I care and love for. I become all about them, I knew this because my sense of self for this is just really bad. I’m working on it, but it takes time after lord knows how many years. I know this aspect is an issue my ex had bc she thought I wasn’t putting her above anyone else but like…. I was. It’s just bad to show bc of what my normal is and when that standard changes due to anything? I’m sure the assumption was that I didn’t care or my feelings decreased — which is understandable but wrong if you just had talked to me more about it.

But I’m not saying that I’m free of guilt for not talking about these issues I had, these problems I hid. Oh no I should have talked about it, but I didn’t want to have the people I care about think bad things about me because these were things I was trying to get past. This was especially true with my ex but I was just fighting so much shit unmedicated that I was always going to lose that battle. If I could have done things differently I totally would, but I don’t think they would have much of a difference because I know the problem was communication on both ends. Me not communicating or choosing to not address something and then doing similar but different things.

I feel like I went nowhere with this but I just wanted to say thinking all this I’m comfortable with me, I’m comfortable with my traits but all of these comforts are contingent on the outside bc like I told my friend — it was super easy for me to accept how my ex thought I was attractive and what she liked about me. And if that was bullshit now like I was told by this former mutual friend then fuck it because I was at least honest with myself. Honest in the sense that absolutely everything out of my mouth about them to them is my honest feelings to this day, but also I would go like straight back into it.

A lot of my life has been based on being forced to grow up or act a certain way because of expectations of me. If not all my life has been that…. But now? Now I’m just throwing my full authentic self out there, you were the first person I did that for. My friend being the second. I know I’ve made mistakes and believe me the road is bumpy. But I am more than that and I’m trying to be my best me

[lucielanciel]

Chains

(Yandere Mayor x Macaque)

TW: Mentions of Night Terrors, Toxic Mindset, Toxic Relationship, Kidnapping, Stalking and Unhealthy Love

°°°°°°°°°°°°

Withering from his hand, the dark-furred monkey wanted to cry out in pure agony, yet not a single sound could escape his throat, not even a single squeak nor groan.

His lamp, shattered and on the ground.

The black wooden interiors of it, became nothing more than broken pieces,

Reflecting how his just a shattered soul, the lamp fragment scattered around the ground, now he was a,  shell of his former self.

"I'm all alone" His lips moved—but still nobody could hear his silent scream

The bright glow of blue, looming from the corner sting his nocturnal eyes.

°

°

°

°

Even late at night, or at day, Macaque woke up clutching the sheets of his bed. The demon was trembling badly due to the recent nightmares.

He looked like a hot mess, absolutely ugly with red sore eyes and how snot dripped down nostrils.

Macaque, felt alone. Tears pricked at the corner of his eyes— a single eye, the left one was useless, basically blind from that side and served no purpose other than to remind him, of what he lost in the past.

Even with his heightened sense. He could feel there was secretly a presence lingering near, but was too tired to even care anymore.

It was pitiful, how lonely he was, to the point where he didn't mind the stalker's attention, as that was the closet thing to a decent and intimate interaction, he'd ever had.

It was even more pitiful, that he fought to keep his life for centuries and had to be a henchman for some bone demon, to try and continue to live.

Everyone has the right to live, Yet for him.

It was more of a privilege.

It was difficult to keep his life intact, nor to live blissfully

Here he was now, sleeping in the 'comfort' of his own home, and so close to throw away all his hard work, by running away.

He, wrapped his arms around himself, trying to imagine, that someone was holding him and couldn't admit it but desperately clinged, on the thought of wanting to be embrace by someone comforting touch.

He wanted to be given whole hearted attention.

He wished, for someone to love him.

Macaque, stood up from his bed, his coarse hands grasped tightly on the edge of the desk, feeling impelled to stand properly despite knees shaking from the displeasing sensation that washed over him like a gust of strong wind.

Alas, Macaque dropped down on the marble floor like a raggedy ann doll, no longer having any strength to support himself nor call anyone to help, his insecurities knew no one would come for him.

Training, with the constant mindset  that asking for help, was a weakness, became  troubling at times, or always since it etched deep in is

His breath hitched, now taking sharp breaths before trying to stand up from the ground, but abruptly, a sudden glow of neon blue chains, attacked him.

The chains, restraining him, causing him to him paralysed upon impact.

Similarly in his dreams, bight neon blue eyes loomed over him in the sheer darkness.

"Even when my lady, has no use for you" The chains neared closer to the monkey's neck, as the voice cooed at him, with a sickening intent.

"You, are useful to me" The dark figure  whispered, his knuckles caressing the monkey's jawline, the glow of the chains, illuminated his more prominent features, showcasing his sharp smile.

The grin growing wider and wider as he tugged on the chains, pulling Macaque closer

"I hope my lady, will accept this" Just by words alone, It was finally clear to him who this trespasser was.

"I've been such a obedient servant towards her, surely she'll accept, us being bound together!"

Macaque, choked at his words.

When he asked for some company

He didn't mean this.

The chains, moved around his body, like snakes, slithering around his skin.

Almost suffocating him.

It took a toll on him and lost himself to the state on unconscious. The last thing he witness was dark blobs clouded his vision before letting slumber take over him

"She might even call it, destiny?" The masculine figure, giggled like a child that was given their precious treats— their precious hard cold treats.

"Could you image that?" Muttering, the bone demon's voice was tinted with joy and swiftly took the overly long coat from his own body, then dropped it loosely around his beloved's shoulder

His bright eyes peered at Macaque's sleeping figure for a single moment, expressing regret due to the dried tears, on their cheeks, but he had a hint of impenitence swirled onto it. One would find it possibly difficult to explain the contradicting emotions in his eyes.

Despite how pitiful Macaque's expression was, the Mayor still found a bit of enjoyment to it, instead.

To find someone, so melancholy like the colours of their fur, was difficult.

To find someone, that experienced the same thing as the fiend's past, was close to none.

The bone demon's taste, when it comes to— partners, was unusual and certainly unique, to try and find someone so broken, that would desperately cling at the small ounce of attention.

So easy to wrap his chains around.

Chronically Ill people, online was a common way to find someone close to his distinctive taste, but they all end up, disapointing him, due to their 'vulgar' ways.

But someone like Macaque, that was close to perfect, he was so deprived of affection and he! This town's mayor would give him the affection he needs, little by little.

Lifting him up the ground, the methallic restrains clinking against each other, accompanied by a faint screeching sound.

He carried, him away from the doju, the wide doors open wide, by the gust of harsh wind.

The demonic figure could only hum, a joyous tune— to signify what he'd accomplished.

He shown no sense of morality, nor guilt for his actions, just pure joy! Knowing, that Macaque was finally in his arms, after months, long grueling months of stalking them around the corner.

It was a hush hush secret, but the Mayor, Oh! He was the one that caused the monkey to constantly be in a nightmare lucid state.

Just to make him vulnerable.

"Imagine, You and Me! Intertwined by destiny."

[words-are-my-medium]

I totally get all those who are wanting Robin or Steve and Nancy together (because Robin is suddenly her gal pal SUPER fast and the show seems set on having EVERYONE try to force Steve back to her, which wth?! but yeah it's there, even if I hate it) but I just can't, like, I NEED Joncy. I waited until the S4 binge to watch S3 and coming off of my first time of S3 which really deepened their relationship so soon like... nah, y'all can't take them away from me.

Shared trauma. Matching scars on their palms and matching scars in their hearts because they both had to kill their former bosses to survive, yes they were possessed by a monster and it was self defense but they still murdered people. They didn't know if it was possible to save them. And then after, when the blob went towards Nancy, Jonathan screaming desperately to get its attention to him instead. That S3 episode gave me chills, more trauma that only they can understand with each other.

Jonathan always wanting the best for her even if it kills him. Telling her that Steve asked him to take her home after the party in S2, trying to cheer her up even if it meant making Steve look better when others might have seized that opportunity to gain her favor. Him making an honest attempt to connect with Samantha at the party like Nancy suggested and maybe there could have been something there but then Nancy needed him. Not wanting to tell her he was going to a different school because he didn't want to pressure her to give up on her dreams for him. Jonathan has had to grow up long before he should have and has spent years putting his loved ones first over himself working and taking care of Will. He doesn't want even a fraction of that disappointment and deep-seated resentment for her. But his and Nancy's interests still align even if their paths are not the same so that they could still have a life together.

Nancy says in S2 she waited for him after S1, and he scoffs it was only "like a month". A month he was trying to put his family back together after they had a FUNERAL for Will. He wasn't ready for the relationship even though he had feelings for her. She learns that over time. They fight about Jonathan's needing a job and her not understanding her privilege, and they come together again stronger, the end of S3 with that hug and that talk before he left. They are two people who have been through so much together and continue to learn to understand each other and come together again better after every hurdle.

So let's do it again this time too. I need Joncy, please I like Steve no hate to him but let's leave that where it is please, I want Byler and Steddie and Robin with a girlfriend too but not Nancy, I need Joncy to survive 🥺

[selfaware-bungou-stray-dogs]

Oda Sakunosuke (self-aware)

Self-Aware! Oda Sakunosuke x GN! Reader

Warning: OOC. Yandere. Slight stalking. Spoilers for Untold Origins, Day I picked up Dazai, Dazai Osamu and Dark Era. English is my second language.

Becoming self-aware

🍛 Oda Sakunosuke become self-aware the moment after he died.

🍛 At first, he felt empty. Katsumi, Shinji, Sakura, Yuu and Kousuke... Were their death just a plot point? A 'food' for 'tragedy lovers'?

🍛 Oda quickly managed to collect himself. Right now, he can't do anything. He needs to investigate. He needs to think everything through.

🍛 Stuck between Living World and Afterlife, Oda continue to stroll down Yokohama streets, as a ghost, unseen by everyone.

🍛 Oda was observing. He was looking after ADA, he saw their pain, he saw Dazai's fury.

🍛 Oda was also looking after Port Mafia. Oda saw, that Mori tried his best to keep Port Mafia members calm. To create a strategy that will resolve this bizarre situation. Oda felt the rage of other Port Mafia members.

🍛 Oda was looking after Ango. He saw panic of his former friend.

🍛 Oda saw everyone. Oda saw, how confused and lost everyone were. The world they knew didn't exist anymore.

🍛 If the world 'exist' can be said about fictional world and characters.

🍛 Oda saw other ghosts. Andre Gide, a person, dressed in a winter coat, Shibusawa Tatsuhiko and others. Oda was sure, that there was more ghost. They were almost invisible. But, he was sure, that they were here.

🍛 Other ghosts wasn't very talkative. Oda didn't try that hard in making a small talk.

🍛 And Oda was thinking. He remembered every book he has read. He thought about every time characters has died or suffer. It didn't make the author a bad person for writing these books. It didn't make readers bad people for liking these books.

🍛 Oda still feel sadness. Sadness for kids' death. Sadness for other characters.

🍛 But, despite everything, Oda can't bring himself to be angry.

🍛 It wasn't anyone's fault. Not theirs. Not readers'. Not author's.

🍛 And then, one day, he felt an entity's gaze on him.

_____________

It was staring.

It wasn't blinking.

Its presence felt suffocating.

Oda was on his guard. He wasn't sure, if this thing was human.

Maybe, it was a demon. Or a god, that made them self-aware.

One thing was clear.

Something real was looking at them.

Oda's ability never showed him any danger. But, he wished that the imposing entity will disappear.

Right now, it didn't do anything. But, for how long it will be that way? How long it will be passive?

And can they fight against it?

Oda wonders if he can do anything against it. Anything to protect others.

And then, time resets.

And he, once again, was a fourteen-year-old assassin, captured at S&K Corporation.

__________

When they start feeling your presence

🍛 The Entity is gone. No more heavy gaze on them.

🍛 At least, for now, Oda can rest. As much as his situation allows him.

🍛 He heard the noise from the other room. The Bodyguard has arrived.

🍛 This time, there were someone else with the bodyguard. Oda can feel two people entering the room he was held in. The second one wasn't dangerous. The second one was simply watching. And they were... Interested? In him?

🍛 The second one was like an open book. Oda could feel their emotions as clear as day.

🍛 Bodyguard and Second One left together. And Oda, once again, heard, how Detective proved Secretary's fault. And Oda, once again, killed the secretary.

🍛 Oda felt, that he needed to do it. But, this time, he didn't want to do it.

🍛 When Bodyguard ripped off the sack, that was covering Oda's face, Oda saw Bodyguard, dead Secretary, and a person, who, for some reason, became in a light blob and were floating above them.

🍛 Apparently, they had the strangest ability ever. At least, among abilities Oda knew about.

🍛 Oda didn't even stop his gaze on them. Just another person.

🍛 Oda, once again, was taken in by police.

🍛 Oda saw Bodyguard and Strange Ability User again, when Bodyguard tried to find information about 'V'.

🍛 Strange Ability User were, once again, were curious about him. And worried about Young Detective.

🍛 And they were floating above him and Bodyguard.

🍛 Okay, why they still were a Light Blob? For what reason? What exactly this ability was for? To be cute? To be able to float? To allow others feel their emotions?

🍛 Oda decide not to ask. It's none of his business.

🍛 The strange day was over. And then time 'resets again'. Oda 'woke up' standing on his front porch. And Dazai, bloodied and wounded, was laying on his front porch. And, for some reason, Strange Ability User were there too. Still as a Light Blob.

🍛 Light Blob lowered themselves and settled on Oda's head.

🍛 Oda had an urge to throw them off. But, right now, he needs to take care of Dazai's wounds.

🍛 And then Oda heard a whisper that came from Light Blob.

"so sorry..." "why..." "him..."

🍛 And sadness. Sadness. As pure as a mountain spring. Like they were... grieving.

🍛 Light Blob... Were they really a human? Or, were they The Entity in disguise?

🍛 Maybe, Dazai knew something about them? Well, there are some time, before he will wake up.

🍛 With Light Blob on his head, Oda carries Dazai into his house.

🍛 Light Blob talked from time to time.

"Oda" "funny" "dangerous, but" "still try to help"

🍛 Okay, when few years? yesterday? Oda called them cute, he was joking. But... They are sounding adorable.

🍛 When Dazai woke up, Oda saw, that his friend looked shocked, angry, sad and happy at the same time. Oda pointed at the Light Blob and asked.

"Dazai, do you know, who are this? This Light Blob sounds adorable."

______________

Their talk was long. Dazai told Oda about everything he knew about The Entity.

And about thinking, that The Entity was evil.

Oda, after getting some answers about The Entity/Light Blob, was silent. Once again, it all was connected to them been fictional characters. Oda looked at Light Blob. At The Reader.

Oda has been thinking about it before. When he was a ghost on empty streets of Yokohama. Oda knew what he should tell Dazai.

"I don't think so, Dazai. We may be fictional characters. But, reading a book about a fictional character with a sad past doesn't mean, that The Reader enjoys suffering. Or, you don't think, that there's nothing interesting in us, except our suffering."

___________

🍛 Oda learned to enjoy Light Blob's company. Oda talked with them from time to time.

"Hey, Blobby, want to go for a walk?"

"Maybe, I should add more spice? What do you think, Blobby?"

"Don't be afraid of Dazai. I knew, that soon he will stop distrust you. He will see, that you aren't evil."

🍛 Oda encouraged Dazai to spoke to the Entity, but Dazai refused to do it. At least until their poker game.

🍛 Then came a run in with "48".

🍛 When Dazai and Oda were trying to escape, the Light Blob were floating ahead. Lighting their way. Dazai compared them to a guiding light.

🍛 Little Light were worried, when Dazai was poisoned.

🍛 Little Light was amazed by his fighting skills. And not even once they were disappointed, that Oda didn't kill anyone.

🍛 And when Dazai and Oda came to bar "Lupin" for the first time, the Light Blob was floating above them.

🍛 Oda thought, that it would be nice, if three of them, Dazai, Light Blob and him, spend time together.

🍛 And time reset once again.

🍛 Dazai, Oda and Ango, once again, met in bar "Lupin".

__________

There was sorrow in Dazai's and Ango's eyes.

They felt, that there is nothing they can do to change the outcome.

Little Light were trembling. They were sad.

"Why [||||||||||||] no one deserves it!"

There was sorrow in Mori's eyes.

"I am sorry, Oda-kun. If this time it could be different, I would choose another path. They like you. And I don't want Voice to be upset. They are... precious to all of us."

Little Light were still sad.

"Oda [||||||||] don't deserve it"

Oda felt Light Blob sadness, when he was visiting Katsumi, Shinji, Sakura, Yuu and Kousuke.

"[||||||||||||] don't deserve it"

Oda felt Little Light's sympathy towards Gide.

"No one deserved it..."

Little Light were crying with Oda, when the van with orphans inside was blowed up.

Little Light were trying to stop Oda together with Dazai.

"Please [|||||||||||||] stay..."

Little Light were crying, when his battle ended. They were crying for everyone, who were hurt by this conflict.

"People live to save themselves. It's something they realize right before they die, huh...? He was... right..."

Once again, Oda died in Dazai's arms.

Oda again was a ghost. Just like before the time reset.

And he heard the voice.

"sorry" "poor kids, poor Oda, poor everyone" "if only I can"

"Oda. If only I could do it, I would make sure that everyone would stay alive. I am so sorry. I wish... You were alive... That they were alive... That your dream came true..."

Oda feels like he was embraced by someone warm and nice. Oda feels something wet on his shoulder.

[In reality, your tears drop on LN's pages.]

Oda's words were warm. He heard, how Dazai called you 'Guiding Light'. Fitting name.

"Guiding Light, don't be sorry. It's not your fault. You are a good person. I wish, we could talk more..."

__________

🍛 Oda, as a ghost, was, once again, observing others. He saw, how Armed Detective Agency slowly come to see you in a good light. How last members of the Mafia accept you as a normal person.

🍛 Oda and other ghosts saw, how new people joined forces to find a way out of the fictional world. A way to you.

But then, one day, the purple moon shined above Yokohama.

And one day, the purple moonlight embraced Sakunosuke Oda.

_______________

When you installed BSD Mayoi Inu Kaikitan

___________

They saw Purple Moon above them. You got an SSR card. BSD Cast were waiting. They were curious about whose card you got.

R,R,R,SR,R,SR,SR,SR,R...

And, finally, SSR...

New one...

But, no one of the characters, whose SSR cards you don't have, felt, that it was their cards.

Purple moonlight fille the room.

They heard your voice.

"Wow! Oda's card! Neat!"

Purple moonlight faded.

Oda Sakunosuke, man, who died four years ago, was standing there. Alive.

__________

🍛 Yosano ran a check-up on Oda. He was fine and well, just a little bit dizzy.

🍛 Dazai and Ango didn't leave Oda's side. They wanted to make sure that their friend is really here.

🍛 Oda was glad to be alive. This way, he can help others to find a way to your world.

🍛 But, for now, he will enjoy your company.

🍛 Oda didn't do much with his cards. He is more interested in where you 'throw' the marble.

🍛 If you have his card in a team, he will use his ability and 'throw' the marble for you. Because of that, you will always have 100% clear stage.

"Why Oda's cards are so pretty?"

"Okay, Oda, let's win this Boss Battle."

"It seems, that I can win Oda SR card in this event. Well, tome to clear some stages.

🍛 Oda (and then Shibusawa with Gide) was helping with adding new cards (new characters) in game. With his ability, he managed to help to add other 'ghost' characters in the game.

🍛 One time, Oda was approached by Natsume Soseki. He asked Oda if he wants to help him and Poe to write new Seasons to add in game. Natsume explained, that Seasons were written like Diary Entries. Oda promised to think about it. He feels, that observing you make him feel better. He wants to know as much as he can about you. About a real person. Maybe, his dream can become a reality.

🍛 He wants to try to write about your world. About real people. About real you.

🍛 Oda is waiting for the moment he will meet with you. He wants to discuss so many things with you. Finally, his conversations will stop to be one-sided.

___________

You got another note in the Gift Box.

Some Gold. And a note.

"Hello, [Y/N]. I hope, that you are alright. Hey, do you have any book recommendations? Will like to discuss literature with you while eating curry. Oda Sakunosuke"

You smile and open Oda's card in Character menu. You pat Chibi Oda's head.

"I might recommend something to you, Oda. Hope, you will like my recommendations. And, I like the idea of eating curry with you."

You didn't notice, that Oda's sprite nodded and smiled.

[faggottonystark]

FELLAS ITS C!TOMMY BUTTERFLY PROPOGANDA TIME

after the most recent prison lore butterfly tommy is now solidified in my head. if i stop using it after this then i never said this. ANYWAY

time for limbo hcs:

- injuries in limbo basically just bleed always. any color except red and theyre always bleedin and flowing and the longer you’re in limbo, the bigger they get because they cant heal in limbo its like a stuck in time kinda thing

- i am stealing the frankenstein zombie skin shit whatever for my cwilbur and ctommy. upon revival, the victims injuries (all of them, so even ones that were just scars are open again in limbo but if it was completely healed over like a paper cut, you dont have that), are covered in patches of of this itchy type skin its usually green but it can also be this pastel purple or yellow and depending on how long you were in limbo, thats how big the patch will be because, like i said, the open wounds are just sitting in limbo and they cant heal so only get bigger. my c!wilbur has a huge blob of the stitched skin stuff on his chest and more under his hair and c!tommys heart has a patch (but its kinda small but it was already a healed scar) and he has remnants of getting beat to death in the prison (big ass patch that covers the underside of his hair and also a little bit of his face/forehead). he has a pretty medium sized one on his neck and some on his chest, and then other scars from exile and doomsday, etc etc also have tiny patches

- 1 white streak of hair represents 1 revival

- stitched/zombie skin whatever its called is very itchy to the victim, constantly scratching and revival victims usually face a great deal of sensory issues in general especially depending on how long they were in limbo 

- too long in limbo (dont know how long this would be just depends on the person i guess) just makes the victim a literal zombie but not the brain eating guy just like. a shell of their former self. 

- for c!jack the most i know about him reviving himself is that he crawled out of hell but my thought for him was different revival methods = different long lasting effects so he wouldnt have the same scars and issues that c!tommy and c!wilbur have 

[popculturebuffet]

Disney Plus just dropped a Pride Month Collection. Your thoughts?

I saw it and was HOPING someone would bring it up or I could slip it into a review because man oh man is this shit hilariously pathetic. Like last year's attempt at showing queer solidarity to earn some quick points:

Still hilarous btw, it TRIES to show them as progressive.. while instead showing just how bad they are at doing representation.

So starting off we have the movie section

It's not as hilarious as the other two, we'll get to that, as there are four full length movies in here making a gennuine effort as well as shorts.

That said two things about it stick out: the first is that there are ONLY four movies here. While I do thank Disney for not having the balls to put any of thier "first gay person" bs films in there, it does show that it took until LAST YEAR to put a gay character of note in a marvel film and that none of the others are huge relases.

As for west side story, which is indeed a film... that one's simply because Ariana Debose, who is wonderous, is nonbinary. Which is awesome, she is, but it does feel a touch pathetic to put a film in there JUST because the actor is nonbinary, especially when they didn't for any films that had other queer actors. I didn't see Cheetah Girls 1 or 2, College Road Trip, The Descendants Trilogy, Encanto, Kim Possible: So the Drama, Onward and that's just the handful I saw that I know have a queer actor in them. The list likely goes on past that. I mean if they wanted to i'd fully support it, but this feels less like putting a spotlight on ariana, like it should, and more like Disney going "oh shit we only have 8 things in this section quick pull another out of our goofy's ass!". So it's not TERRIBLE but it is pretty shocking just how little queer content disney has, as well as how a possible out, spotlighting it's queer actors, was never thought of beyond one single movie.

Now onto our main event

It's beautiful. Stupid and self serving but beautiful. So yeah for starters like movie's it' slaughably sparse. It's not as bad as there's still a decent spread of shows and outside of glee I honestly can't speak for big shot, hsm the series, future president, doogie kamahola MD, or grown ish as I haven't seen them and only know jessica jones and runaways gayness by having read stuff. And on stuff I have seen I watched all of glee as it aired...

Look I was a nerdy kid who loved music. It wasn't a hard sell and only became one as it slowly degraded into a blob monster of hit's former self. I regret nothing. But they had NOTHING to do with Glee's production so while not a bad grab, it had quite a few queer characters and decent one at that including Blaine played by my boy darren criss and Santana played by the late great Naya Rievera as my faviorites out of it's queer cast, it does come off as reaching. Owl House, while something they CANCELED, is also a stellar choice. Granted I also hope this means more yelling at them for it but still. We also get louder and prouder which not only had a standout episode I planned to cover this month but got bumped up thanks to don't say gay, REMEMBER THAT GUYS?, b

But then we get reachy. We have amphibia which DOES have gay characters: oliva and yunan, the IT gals, the "I don't clownface you" guys, and our main trio despite never gettin ga proper upgrade, it just feels lik e"hey this has a few gay characters" feels a bit of a reach.

But then we get to ENTIRE reaches. We have Star Vs which while heavily impling tom, star and marco are all bi or pan, never really goes through with it and in the episode section promotes just friends.. for showing same sex couples. It congradulates the show fo rdoing the bARE MINIMUM. We also get louder and prouder which at the very least has a gay character in the main cast

Then we have the biggest joke of all: Gravity Falls. They put the series they let have the BAREST BIT of gay content at the end in, that they constantly rejected ANY AND ALL gay content from i nthere.. from a guy who DIRECTLY AND RIGHTFULYL MOCKED THEM FOR THE EVERYONE'S WELCOME UNDER THE RAINBOW TWEET. It's a level of embarassment i'd be shocked a company had reached if it was anyone but disney.

Overall it's not that the rep is bad persay, ther'es some decent one, but only ONE of these shows has a queer lead and only a few of them are on mainline networks and one of them, and Glee was added again transparently for representatoin. It probably woudl've eventually but doing it THIS MONTH just makes it obvious.

But most hilarious, most damming is that they LEFT SHOWS OUT. Yes. REALLY. With a list this small they STILL forgot some shows had queer content. So in order

Andi Mack: THe most galling omission as one of the main cast members is gay, both in character and in real life, and was Disney Channel's first gay character I believe. Hell some of his coming out arc is outright MISSING from the service because disney wants you to forget they hired a pedophile to play the dad. Yes that happened. But it's not the show's fault. They coudln't of known he was a sex monster. Just my god

Big City Greens: Admitely it's just two side characters we see together and who are confirmed a couple in the valentine's special but it's weird that's fine for Amphibia but not this show to get put on there.

DuckTales; Now like the gravity falls one this would bite them in the ass a bit as they outright blocked saying Penny was gay.. but she still is and says she is best they could. Not only that you also have weblena and Storkules. There is no straight explination for eithe rof those.

The Muppet Show: Not only was Richard Hunt gay as hell, but you also had queer guests like Elton John on there. It' sbaffling.

The Simpsons: This is a BIG one to me, especially since next week i'm doing FOUR episodes of the show for pride as part of a bigger project. Not just plugging myself there either: homer's phobia was groundbreaking for the time, there's something about marrying handles how gay marriage was and the more recent smithers episodes with him coming out and finding love help recontexualitze what was once a "GET IT HE'S Gay" joke. The show isn't the gayest, i'll grant you but the fact two major supporting cast members are gay and the shows had a decent amount of queer characters, it's weird to not feature it or at least the gay episodes. And it's not the homophobia either: Louder and Prouder's father figures is all abou homophobia as are the black-ish episodes featured. there is NO excuse.

So yeah episodes are also a mess. My point here is that while Disney is trying.. they really haven't learned anything about representation and hopefully CAN.

[gunpowdville]

The Great Flesh-Eating Cake Incident of Year [REDACTED], Chapter 2

chapter: 2/2

relationships: Drumbot Brian-Raphaella la Cognizi (queerplatonic), Gunpowder Tim/Lyfrassir Edda/Marius Von Raum, Nastya Rasputina/the Aurora

Other things: genderfluid Tim, she/her Tim, he/fae Marius, temporary character death, possession, canon-typical violence. but mostly literally just silly self-indulgent fluff.

chapter 1

ao3

Read here below the cut >:}

The Rec Room: Tim, Lyf, Marius. All 10 still alive. (a few minutes before It is released)

Lazy days on Aurora are hard to come by, and when they do happen, they are spent most often by complaining about how boring lazy days are. Some, however, can find content in the slower days spent in relative peace and quiet. Case in point: the three currently buried in a pillow nest in the middle of the rec room floor.

The situation is this: the pillows and cushions from the furniture all stripped away and stolen to build a comfortable arrangement on the floor. Gunpowder Tim, in simply a loose blouse and leggings, hair braided elegantly over one shoulder. Lyfrassir Edda, in what is undeniably one of Tim’s waistcoats, perched in between the gunner’s legs, having their hair braided by her deft hands. Marius von Raum, sprawled across Lyf’s lap, waving his hands about animatedly as he talks.

“You left out the best part,” Tim says as Marius finishes relaying the story of how fae and Raph had joined the crew. “You forgot to mention the bit where Bri gave the two of you an actual job interview. And how, upon being asked your greatest strengths, you said, and I quote, ‘I’m hot.’”

“You did not,” Lyf looks utterly scandalized. “At a job interview?”

“You forget, love, that the job fae was applying for was being a Mechanism,” Tim points out, running her fingers through the former inspector’s hair. “The criteria is pretty much being able to play an instrument and willing to do crime.”

“Speaking of,” Marius says, batting aimlessly at Tim’s face where it peeks at him over Lyf’s shoulder. “It’s a shame that we only really have two or so songs together, Tim. We should get to sing together more.”

Tim nods in agreement. “We’re simply too powerful together.”

“I’ve been thinking of trying to get Jonny to let the three of us sing Blood & Whiskey,” Marius admits, then frowns. “Oh, wait, sorry Lyffers, I forgot you sound like a drowning cat when you sing.”

“I do not!” Lyf flushes scarlet, turning their face away from Tim’s raised eyebrow.

“You’re right, sorry, it’s more like a drowning cat playing a kazoo.”

Lyf makes an attempt to hit Marius lightly, but the violinist just catches their hand and kisses the back of it, grinning wickedly.

“Y’know, I don’t think I’ve ever actually heard you sing,” Tim says slyly, tying off the braid and leaning forward so she can rest her chin on Lyf’s shoulder. “Would you sing for me?”

“Do you enjoy the sound of a drowning cat playing a kazoo?” Lyf asks her.

“Well, not exactly…”

“Then according to Mare, you do not want to hear me sing.”

Tim pouts, showing off her mastery of sad puppy dog eyes. The overhead lights glinting off the metal make them sparkle, creating a masterfully alluring wide gaze. “Please? Just a bit? For me?”

It is next to impossible to argue with those eyes, especially once you’ve already fallen hard for the person making them at you. With a sigh, Lyf squeezes their eyes tight shut and awkwardly sings a few lines of Blood & Whiskey. It sounds, as promised, like a drowning cat playing a kazoo.

Tim manages to hold a straight face for roughly three seconds before guffawing with laughter, burying her face in the spot between Lyf’s shoulder and neck to smother her cackles.

Lyf breaks off, turning their head slightly with a gently irritated eyebrow raised at their partner. “Are you finished?”

“Sorry,” Tim gasps between giggles, nuzzling further into their neck, failing miserably at trying to stifle her mirth. “I- I just- I didn’t expect it to actually sound- like that- I’m- I’m sorry-”

“I told you,” Marius crows, grinning up at Lyf and Tim with triumphant teasing fire in faer eyes. “Wasn’t I right?”

“You two are very rude to me,” Lyf huffs, sticking their nose in the air haughtily. Tim lifts her face from their shoulder and noses their jaw, murmuring something about drowning cats and how they have never sounded more attractive. Lyf pointedly ignores her.

“Aw, hey, don’t be like that, fairytale,” Marius heaves himself into a sitting position and catches the former inspector’s face in his hands. “Y’know we’re just teasing you ‘cuz we love you, yeah?”

“Yeah, yeah, I love you too,”Lyf sighs, giving in and letting faer kiss them.

“Sappy,” Tim comments, earning a petulant finger from Marius. “Also, fairytale?”

“They’re my fairytale,” Marius declares proudly, and Tim pouts. “What am I, then?”

“You,” Lyf contemplates, turning their head to meet Tim’s metallic gaze with their own iridescent one. “You’re my battle cry. You’re the song I sing for strength when I can’t find it. You’re my declaration to the world that I will not stand still and break. You’re the inspiration that keeps me fighting. My battle cry.”

“Well,” Tim blinks, making a valiant attempt to keep her voice steady. “Hey now. You didn’t have to go and do that to me.”

Lyf’s brow furrows, concern instantly evident in their features. “Did I say something wrong?”

“No, goddamnit, you said everything right, you- fuck.” without another word, Tim fists a hand in the front of their shirt and pulls them into a kiss. “I fucking love you.”

Lyf’s (no doubt sappy as all hell) response is cut off by Marius, who groans and rolls out of their lap with a huff. “If you two are going to be like that, I’m leaving.”

“You started it,” Tim points out, “but whatever, more Lyf time for me.”

Marius sticks faer tongue out at her as fae leaves. “Go see if Bri’s made me any munchies!” Tim calls after him, before turning back to her partner with a decidedly malicious smirk. “Now, where were we?”

They are interrupted not long after by Brian, who comes barging into the room without preamble, zeroes distractedly in on the pair of them, says “Oh. Hello, dears. Have either of you seen an unidentifiable mass of sentient ooze? Slightly larger than an octokitten? It ate Marius,” and then hurries out the opposite door.

Tim and Lyf glance at each other, attempting to register his words. “Wha- Brian, what?”

But the Drumbot has already disappeared down the corridor, leaving the two of them to scramble to their feet and race after him, their questions landing on ignorant ears.

Nastya, the corridors: 9 left alive, 1 eaten.

Nastya spends her lazy days with her girlfriend, most of the time. She enjoys the quieter hours when she can work on repairs, listening to Aurora tell her stories or complain about whatever is on her mind. This particular lazy day, the engineer is sitting cross-legged on the floor of one of the corridors, right outside Jonny’s room, her hands deftly working at the wires beneath one of the wall panels. Aurora is telling her about a new program she and Ivy are working on, a sort of virtual reality experience for the shooting range that will ‘revitalize the excitement of warfare’, in her words. Nastya listens intently, interjecting with questions when she has them and praise when it is deserved.

As she finishes up, carefully replacing the wall panel and smiling softly at Aurora’s petulant complaints, something drops from the air vent above her. She takes a smooth step back as the thing falls to the floor with a wet thwack. At first glance it resembles an octokitten, but as it unfurls it reveals itself as more of a dark glistening lump, tendrils of gooey flesh extending across the floor toward Nastya.

“Well, hello,” The engineer says, tilting her head to study it. “What are you?”

That is the cake our Drumbot and his science officer made, Aurora answers for her. Don’t touch it.

“This is a cake?”

I believe it was supposed to be.

“And what is it now?”

Decidedly not a cake.

It’s at that moment that Ivy comes racing into the corridor, breathless and looking faintly annoyed. “Ah. Nastya. Good. Have you seen-” her eyes drift to the thing at Nastya’s feet. “That.”

“I am certainly looking at it right now,” Nastya says in response, nudging a toe forward to poke at it. Ivy throws out an arm to stop her. “Do not. Unless you want to get eaten.”

Nastya raises an eyebrow and quickly steps back, just as an octokitten meanders into the area, approaching the blob with a curious ‘mrrp’. Ivy dives for it, but the creature is much faster, latching onto the octokitten in a second. But instead of eating it, the thing seems to melt into it, turning it a darker color.

“Hm,” Ivy hums curiously. “That’s new.”

The possessed octokitten zeroes in on Ivy and Nastya, yawning wide to show a lot more teeth than should be able to fit in its mouth.

“Run?” Nastya suggests, watching the kitten start forward on uneasy tentacles.

“Run,” Ivy agrees.

Jonny & Ashes, the shooting range: 9 left alive, 1 eaten.

The shooting range is one of the few rooms on Aurora that isn’t quiet on lazy days. This day is no different from any other in that regard, with the sounds of gunfire and cackling echoing from behind the wide open door. The quartermaster and the first mate are both in there, trapped in a pointless competition to outshoot each other. They have done this many times before, and who wins changes nearly every time. But it’s an excellent way to distract and relieve stress, and Jonny had noticed Ashes appearing down earlier, so he had suggested a shooting competition. He never said that he was doing it to cheer them up, but he’s pretty sure they’ve caught on to his intentions.

“I kicked your ass harder than Brian got his ass kicked in that sun,” Ashes remarks, standing over Jonny, who lies prone on the floor. Jonny groans and sits up, shoving his singed hair off of his forehead. “You cheated.”

“Says what rules?” Ashes snorts, reaching down to help him up.

“It was a shooting match, O’Reilly, not a goddamn grenade match.”

“Your screaming was hilarious, though.”

Jonny scowls and flips them off. Ashes laughs and slips another grenade into their pocket, a little something to save for later.

The trapdoor in the ceiling of the shooting range drops open, and Raphaella tumbles through, falling head over heels and landing neatly on her feet with a dancer’s grace. “We have something of a problem.”

“Yeah, Ashes just fucking blew me up,” Jonny complains, and Ashes rolls their eyes. “You’re fine.”

“You’re fine,” Raphaella says at exactly the same time, and Ashes shoots a grin at her. “Anyway, Bri and I may have done… something.”

“You may have done something,” Brian argues, breezing into the room with Tim and Lyf close on his heels. “I take no responsibility.”

“Can we please go back to the part where it ate my boyfriend?” Lyf demands, causing Jonny’s eyebrows to shoot up practically to his hairline. “Someone’s eating boyfriends?”

“The octokittens are possessed,” this is Nastya, squeezing past Brian through the door, tailed by Ivy.

“Possessed?”

“Possessed,” Ivy confirms, to Brian’s incredulous outburst.

“D’you mean those octokittens?” Jonny asks, pointing to the door. Sure enough, a gaggle of octokittens meanders through, moving a bit unsteadily, oily dark colors writhing beneath their skin.

“That looks like- that’s-” Lyf’s eyes go wide as they stare at the kittens. “What the fuck is that?”

“It was supposed to be a cake,” Brian says mournfully.

“It ate Marius!”

“It’s technically your child, Lyf,” Raphaella pipes up. “The compound I used to make it is based on your blood samples.”

Lyf just stares at her.

“It doesn’t look that bad,” Ashes remarks. They crouch down and flip open their lighter, holding it in front of one of the kittens’ face. It flinches, then snarls and shoots toward them, latching onto their foot, its jaws opening far wider than they should be able to. They try to kick it off, but its tentacles appear to have melted onto their skin and are slowly eating through. With a squelch, the odd entity detaches fully from its octokitten host, who blinks and scuttles into the corner.

With a pained grunt, Ashes drops their lighter onto the thing on their foot, successfully setting the thing alight. It recoils and retreats to the center of the floor, squelching in a frantic circle. It leaves behind nothing left of the quartermaster’s foot, and Ashes stumbles and is caught by Jonny, who steadies them and shoots a murderous look at the flaming blob.

“Fuck fuck fuck,” Ashes hisses through their teeth, pain evident on their features. “Goddamn. What the fuck, you two.”

“Again, I take no responsibility,” Brian insists. Raphaella sticks her tongue out at him. “You are a bastard and a traitor and I never loved you anyway.”

Brian blows her a kiss and a wink.

“Interesting,” Ivy interrupts, pulling out a notepad and writing something down. “It appears fire is ineffective.”

This gets everyone’s attention directed back to the creature, which is indeed decidedly not dead or incapacitated in any way. It isn’t even on fire anymore. And it looks angry.

“You’re kidding me,” Ashes growls, staring at the thing with disgusted fury.

“Run,” Tim suggests, pushing Lyf gently out of the way as the thing focuses on them and begins to move forward. “Split up and run. It can’t get all of us at once.”

Jonny nods and dutifully starts off out of the room, taking Ashes with him, holding them up as they limp and curse. Ivy and Nastya shoot off in another direction, Nastya scooping up the disgruntled left-behind octokitten as she goes. Raphaella grabs Lyf’s wrist and pulls them up through the ceiling trapdoor, ignoring their startled protests. That leaves Tim with Brian. She turns to him, poised to ask what the plan is, but hesitates when she sees Brian standing there, head cocked to one side, staring blankly at the empty floor. The bifrost cake-creature is nowhere to be seen.

“Brian?” Tim steps forward, reaching out and resting a concerned hand on his shoulder. “Bri? You good?”

Brian’s head lifts, slowly, in an uncharacteristically stilted motion. His eyes are… wrong. Something is moving in them, and if Tim looks closely she can see it oozing from the corners. Oh. Oh no.

“Fuck,” she breathes, stumbling backward and reaching for a pistol. “Not Brian not Brian not Brian.”

The thing in Brian’s body smiles, forcing the expression onto the Drumbot’s face. It takes a step forward. Of course, it’s at that moment that the Toy Soldier decides to make its first appearance.

“Sorry I’m late!” It announces as it steps into the shooting range. “I was in the middle of a delightful painting using the blood from that corpse Jonny dragged onto the ship the other day! I didn’t want to leave it for too long in case it was ruined! Anyway, I heard there was a crew meeting?”

“Oh, I’d love to see that painting,” Tim says, momentarily distracted. The Toy Soldier claps its hands together excitedly. “Of course! I’ll set up a viewing!”

Tim grins. “Lovely. Now, what do you know of possession?”

“Well, it depends on what kind!”

“Um,” Tim glances back at Brian and whatever is piloting him, who has stopped in its tracks and is watching the exchange curiously. “Well. Would you.. Happen to know anything about possession by.. Cake?”

In the brief pause that follows, the thing inside Brian appears to give up on its curiosity and steps forward, opening his mouth. Tim frowns at it for a moment, confused, and then she sees the soft glow building in the back of the Drumbot’s throat. “Oh shit.”

Tim & The Toy Soldier, just outside the shooting range, 9 left alive, 1 footless, 1 eaten

Tim grabs the Toy Soldier and pulls it with her as she bolts to the door, just as a jet of flame shoots out of Brian’s mouth.

“Since when can he do that?” she yelps, flattening herself against a wall to avoid being scorched.

“Oh, that is interesting!” TS declares, peeking around the doorframe. Tim nods. “So. To catch you up. There’s some sort of Bifrost related demon-creature loose on the ship, it is currently inside Brian’s body and appears to be controlling him. Fire can’t kill it. Oh, and it ate Mare.”

The Toy Soldier nods, bouncing on the balls of its feet. “So?”

Tim blinks, then shrugs. “We kill it, I suppose. At least get it out of Brian.”

“How do we do that?”

“That’s what I’m asking you!”

Another jet of flame shoots past them, followed by what sounded oddly like a frustrated grunt. The thing still hasn’t actually followed them into the hall, which is a good sign, if somewhat nonsensical. Tim flinches further back instinctively, feeling the heat in her eyes.

“I don’t know what to do,” she confesses. “I don’t know how to get it out without opening Brian up, and he won’t like that. And I can’t even get close to it when it’s breathing fire at us like that.”

“Hmm,” the Toy Soldier hums a thoughtful note. Tim bites her lip, thinking, then lets out a soft laugh. “I’m glad I’m here with you and not Nastya,” she tells TS. “She’d probably suggest kissing it.”

There’s an awkward clank from the shooting range, followed by the sounds of a struggle. Tim glances at TS, who shrugs. “I could kiss it!”

“Could you?” Tim frowns again. “I mean.. I suppose it would just be kissing Brian, wouldn’t it, unless.. D’you think that would work? The kissing?”

“Possibly!” the Toy Soldier sounds positively thrilled about the prospect. “I’m very good at it, you know!”

“I feel like making out with the eldritch blob possessing our crewmate is a bit extreme,” Tim says, peeking around to corner to see what’s happening in the shooting range. What she sees gives her pause.

Brian seems to be fighting back against the thing holding his body hostage. He’s standing in the room where they left him, and every so often he takes a jerky, strained step forward, like he’s having to force himself to step. Although in this case its more likely that he’s trying to stop himself from taking a step. He looks pained, and Tim feels that familiar protective rage rising in her, that feeling of no he’s mine you can’t hurt him. All thoughts of kissing fade away, and she steps out, pistol in hand, and marches back into the shooting range.

“Brian,” she says, and the Drumbot’s head lifts slightly, his eyes still leaking sludgy iridescence. “Bri. Hey. I know you can hear me. Uh. I’m going to do something, and it might be.. A bit uncomfortable for you, but it will hopefully work out in the long run. So do me a favor and… stop fighting it for a moment? Just a moment.”

Brian gives her a wary look, but nods stiffly, clearly using every bit of control he has left. Then he lets go. His face goes blank, and his mouth opens, that glowing heat making another appearance. With a grimace, Tim lifts her pistol and fires.

The bullet flies true, carving straight through the flamethrower mechanism in the back of Brian’s throat and exiting out the back of his head. There’s an inhuman screeching sound, and Brian jerks once as the creature, with its main source of power destroyed, crawls out of the hole left behind.

Brian shudders once, then raises a hand to touch the new hole in his head.

“You alright?” Tim asks, stepping forward. “You.. you?”

“I’m fine,” Brian reassures her. “That could have obliterated my vocal cords, but I’m alright.”

“You’re welcome,” Tim says, tossing her braid back over her shoulder smugly.

“I don’t want to ruin the good mood,” TS says, peeking into the room curiously. “But, where did it go?”

Tim and Brian both freeze, locking terrified eyes. And then the lights go out.

Raphaella, Lyfrassir, Nastya, Ivy: In the dark. 9 left alive, 1 eaten, 1 footless

When the lights go out, someone screams. It’s Lyf. Raphaella shoots them a glare over her shoulder, aware of their ability to see in the dark.

“Sorry,” they whisper. Raphaella frowns. “Why are you whispering?”

“I don’t know,” they admit. “It feels like the right thing to do.”

“Aurora?” That’s Nastya’s voice, coming from just ahead of them. She sounds worried. “Aurora, please say something. Please tell me if you’re hurt. Aurora?”

“Nas?” Raphaella moves forward, stretching a hand out until she bumps into the engineer’s shoulder. Nastya grabs her hand and gives it a quick squeeze, an indication that she’s here and she’s alright. “Raph, good. Is Lyfrassir still with you?”

“Right here,” Lyf says, still whispering. “Where’s Ivy?”

“Here as well,” the archivist pipes up from the other side of Nastya. “Everyone’s okay, as far as we can tell, Aurora simply.. Stopped.”

“Do you think it got to her?” Lyf asks, shifting nervously behind Raphaella.

“It better not have,” Nastya snaps, her concern for her girlfriend evident in her voice.

Raphaella squeezes Nastya’s shoulder and looks around, cursing the fact that she hasn’t given herself night vision yet. “Ives, can you get ahold of Bri?”

Ivy nods and closes her eyes, typing out a message to Brian in her brain. After a moment, she nods again and announces, “He’s alright. Tim and the Toy Soldier are with him. It took control of his body, but they got it out of him and he’s barely hurt.”

“That’s good!” Raphaella exclaims, giving Nastya’s shoulder another squeeze. “That means Aurora should be fine, once we get it out of her!”

Nastya nods, expression growing determined. “How do we get it out of her?”

“Um, I don’t mean to alarm anyone,” Lyf says, sounding a bit shaky. “But there is something wrapped around my leg.”

They sound afraid, but not panicked or in pain, which causes Raphaella to frown. They don’t even sound urgent. “Are you alright?”

“Yeah I’m- I’m fine, it isn’t hurting me. It’s more… it’s like it’s hugging me.”

“Didn’t you say you made it out of their blood?” Ivy inquires, and Raphaella nods. “Perhaps it recognizes them as one of its own.”

“I don’t like the implications of that,” Lyf says quietly, then gives a determined shake of their head. “Right. Now is not the time for a Bifrost-related panic attack.”

“We can use this,” Raphaella perks up suddenly. “We can use your connection to it, Lyffy, to… something.”

Silence falls as the four of them think on it. And then Ivy speaks up. “I have something from Brian. He met up with Jonny and Ashes, and Jonny has an idea. He just needs us to lure it into something smaller and able to be picked up.”

“Can we do that?” Raphaella glances to Lyf, who nods. “Great. Let’s go.”

Lyfrassir, the kitchen. Same situation.

The kitchen is dark and eerie when Lyf enters, stepping carefully over the seething tendrils rising from the floor, grabbing at their legs. It’s almost possessive, the way it reaches for them, curling around them with its oozing tentacles. They can almost hear it talking to them, in their head, whispering mine mine mine. It terrifies that, but they shove it aside to think about later, once they’ve got this dealt with. Instead they focus on locating something small and liftable to lure the thing into. They find something almost instantly.

As they approach the object they’ve chosen, their Bifrost-enhanced eyes land on something in the middle of the floor, a moving shape.

“Hey, babe,” they say, stepping lightly over the half-formed Marius Von Raum to the counter.

“Hi,” fae groans, conscious enough for at least that. “Whatcha up to?”

“Oh, nothing,” Lyf replies, placing their hands gently on the object they want to bring the creature into, watching it curl up around their arms and moving down the walls toward them, chasing the contact. “And… there we are.”

In a flash, Jonny comes pelting into the room. He grabs Small Brian the electric mixer from Lyf’s hands, and as the lights come on he races down the corridor, and the sound of a door sliding open can be heard.

“What did you do?” Brian demands as the first mate reappears, smugly dusting off his hands.

“Tossed it out the airlock,” Jonny grins.

“Right, ‘cause throwing all our problems out an airlock always works,” Ashes snorts. Jonny frowns. “It does.”

Tim shakes her head. “Oh, you are so lucky I can’t roll my eyes too hard without fucking up my face, D’Ville.”

Brian looks gutted. “You- you threw- Small Brian?”

Jonny freezes. “Oh- oh shit, Bri- I didn’t- Shit shit shit.”

“We’re getting it back,” Brian says, folding his arms and glaring. “As soon as Aurora’s recovering, we’re getting it back.”

“How do we know that that thing will die out there and not just… devour a star system?” Lyf asks. Jonny shrugs. “That’s not our problem.”

“I… fair enough,” Lyf sighs, and casts a last look toward the airlock before going to help Marius up.

Brian & Raphaella: Everyone alive and well

They get everything on the ship back in order quickly. Marius is back, and is being regaled with the tales of what he missed by Lyf and Tim. As soon as Aurora is ready to move again, Brian takes her to pick up Small Brian, and he carries the mixer reverently back to its place in the kitchen. “You’re a hero,” he whispers to it, before kissing the top of it lightly. He then gathers all the ingredients to make another cake, a real one this time.

Just as he’s setting up to get everything made, Nastya comes marching out of the corridor from where she’s been checking up on Aurora, a flamethrower in hand.

“Right,” she says, firing up the weapon. “Where are the fuckers who got my girlfriend possessed?”

Raphaella and Brian glance at each other, knowing this was coming. With a grin, Raphaella runs over and grabs Brian’s hand, pulling him after her down the hall and away from the vengeful engineer.

Nastya curses and follows, and Raphaella lifts off the ground, sweeping Brian into her arms bridal-style to easier carry him. He yelps, and then laughs, twisting to look down and watch Nastya chase after them, looking furious.

Raphaella rounds into a tight corner and sets down, letting Brian back on his feet. They’re both giggling, and Brian buries his face in her shoulder, grinning widely. She kisses his hair and strokes it lightly, running her fingers around the edges of the hole in the back of his neck.

Nastya finds them like that, rounding the corner and hefting her flamethrower with a malicious glimmer in her eyes. “There you are,” she hisses, and this time there’s nowhere to run.

“It was fun while it lasted,” Raphaella murmurs to Brian as she pulls back, and he takes her hand.

“Love you always,” he replies, and she leans over to kiss his cheek. “See you soon.”

And together, they face their fate.

[kaesaaurelia]

I keep seeing people saying that AO3 is somehow discriminating against longfic writers by not letting us use more than 75 tags, and I have to say as a longfic writer with no attention span I am never going to read your fic that's tagged with every single character in the canon, because my eyes glaze over before I get to the summary. It's hard for me to parse long, un-broken-up blobs of text! And the summaries are often not helpful anyway because there's a lot of one-sentence summaries that tell me nothing. I get the impression a lot of people want to keep their summaries short and punchy, so they put eeeeverything in the tags.

"But you don't understand, I write really long longfic. Like, novel-length! I need more tags!"

Sure. I definitely use a higher number of tags for my longer fics. Currently I'm wrapping up the writing a fic that will probably be around 350,000 words. (It's only at 338k right now but I have to resolve this final conflict and write the denouement.) I'm a really wordy writer.

Minus the rating and archive warnings (which are not restricted) I think this thing is going to have 31 tags. That's higher than average but it's nowhere near 75. Some of these tags aren't strictly necessary, like my reassurance that nothing bad will happen to the cat, and some of them are probably not anything people will be searching for fic with, like Plucky Angel Detectives, which is sadly not canonical and I made it up, but I did want to capture the dynamic of enthusiastic faux competence these two characters have when they are looking for Crowley and/or pretending unconvincingly to look for him.

Things I'm not tagging for:

- content notes which I'll put in the authors' notes of applicable chapters, but that is not broadly applicable to the whole fic, like the few scenes with female-presenting Crowley, the occasional wing kink, Weiss' eye torture, etc. (TBH I might add "period typical bigotry" and also "switching," the former because I do get why that would be an absolute dealbreaker to some people, and the latter because this fandom is so fucking exhausting about top/bottom nonsense.)

- tropes that doesn't notably differ from how the characters are in canon (so I'm not going to tag Crowley Was Not Raphael, even though Crowley is not Raphael in my fic) or are already pretty much baked into canon (like Heaven Is A Bureaucracy).

- stuff that is already clearly evident in the tags I have chosen -- Aziraphale Loves Crowley and Crowley Loves Aziraphale are self-evident from the ship tag and I'm not tagging Whump separately because one of the tags will be Crowley Whump and so it will be searchable/excludable for people looking for/excluding Whump, while also indicating who is getting whumped.

- anything that would make someone feel cheated if they clicked on my fic for a substantial amount of that thing and then didn't find it -- so no War in Heaven, no Clarence Darrow, no post-hangover cozy pancake brunches, no Original Cat Character, no Original Angel Character/Original Demon Character ship tag. These are all important to the fic! But there are fics about Aziraphale and Crowley owning a cat, or the War in Heaven, or that are substantially about coziness, and if that's all you want, you won't want to wade through this fic. (Apparently there's no fic about Clarence Darrow but there's enough original fiction based on his life that I am not sure we need it.)

- specific OCs. Vehuel, Leonard, and Danny are all fairly prominent in the fic, but they are pretty much all encompassed by Original Angel Character(s), Original Demon Character(s), and Original Human Character(s). No one who hasn't read my fic knows who the fuck Danny is, or what differentiates him from Leonard, but they do probably have an idea whether they want to read a Good Omens fic that substantially involves demon OCs and also human OCs. The catch-all OC tags also handily take care of whether I would tag for Nisroc (who definitely comes up a lot, but is never onscreen) or Nicky the bartender (who recurs as a character, but not as much as Danny).

[sergeant-bonky]

Size Doesn't Matter

Chubby!Bucky X Reader

Summary: Bucky is feeling self conscious after seeing you in a new pair of skinny jeans and he's left anxious wondering if he still meets your standards naked. (Based off the prompt submitted to the @the-ss-horniest-book-club)

Warnings: A little bit of angst, self doubt, fluff, reader is a former porn actress, sexy times implied ❤️

A/N: Chubby!Bucky is just the sweetest and couldn't resist taking this one from @the-ss-horniest-book-club 😭❤️

Round belly, check. Thick thighs, check. Round face, check. Bucky sighed as he checked off the most obvious features about his body.

His eyes downcast, lingering on the way his shirt is almost bursting at the seams from being a size too small. He's gained weight, he knows he has but recently he's become more self aware of it when he saw you walk in the room wearing skinny jeans. A look he knows he'd never pull off.

You were perfect, perfect enough to once have a career in the porn industry. It doesn't bother him, the thought of another man being inside you.

The porn industry was years ago. You've changed a lot since then, a new hairstyle, new image, new life. You met Bucky in the local bakery. He was going through a hard time and ordered a lot of donuts and pastries. You were in line behind him when you heard the owner tell him the cost and he was short changed. You stepped in, paid the remaining bill and never looked back.

Bucky was your sweetheart. Looks never mattered to you, it was what was on the inside that mattered the most. A kind heart, bubbly personality was what you looked for in a man.

Size really didn't matter to you.

Bags of groceries hung off your arms as you walked back to Bucky's apartment a few blocks from yours. The dark clouds partially covered the moon and hid the stars.

Moon and stars. You smile thinking back of the times you laid in bed with Bucky, your arms wrapped around his waist as he talked for hours about the moon and stars. You loved hearing him talk, you loved him and wished you could show him how much.

Bucky was looking for a bigger shirt to wear to hide his round belly. None of the shirts he owned would fit, he didn't think he had gained that much weight.

You heard drawers and curses coming from the bedroom when you entered his apartment.

"Bucky?" You called out, setting the grocery bags down on the ground and shrugging off your jacket and toeing off your boots.

You rubbed your hands together to warm them up as you moved towards his bedroom, gasping when he looked defeated.

"Bucky what's wrong?" You rush over to him, tucking a strand of hair behind his ear and kneeling on the floor between his thighs.

"None of my shirts fit." He mumbled, averting his gaze from your worried face.

"That's fine, we'll get you some more." You said, grasping his hand in yours. Bucky looked like he wanted to say more and was having an argument in his head on whether he should say it or not, "What is it? What's wrong?" You pressed gently, not wanting to push him too much.

"I just— I don't feel like I'm the kind of guy who would meet your standards..." He trailed off, cringing by how silly it sounded out loud.

"What do you mean?" You frowned, but not in annoyance, in worry that he was implying he wanted to break up with you.

"I'm talking about sex." He scoffs, standing up from the bed and moving away from you.

"What about it? We haven't had it yet."

"Exactly and look at you Y/N. You're fucking gorgeous and I'm this– blob." Bucky sighs before continuing, "If you ever did see me naked I'm sure you'd vomit."

His words made your heart break, just to hear him speak about himself so negatively.

"Bucky." You sigh, stepping towards him slowly, "I love you. And you might not see it but I see you, for you. You're my adorably cuddly bear and really, size doesn't matter. I'll love you no matter what. To me, you're perfect and I don't ever want you to change that for me or for anyone else. Can I show you how much I love you?" At this point you're standing against his chest, little hairs peeking out from the top of his shirt. His erratic breathing isn't hard to miss, either from your implication that you want to have sex with him, or from your heartfelt words. Words he knows are genuine because there wasn't a hint of a lie in your tone.

"If you're sure, doll." Bucky speaks quietly, unsure if you're really wanting to do this. He's been dreaming of this moment since the two of you started dating months ago, the excuses he gave you each time you thought you might get him into bed with you, only to have him throw you off and leave your apartment without looking back. But tonight it's different, there's no excuses, it's just you, it's just him.

[lucielanciel]

Distant Memory (Dark Shadowpeach) (Part 1)

Part 2

Prompt: Macaque, finds a simple yet efficient way to keep Monkie King, in place.

TW: Lying, Imprisonment, Implied Abuse and Mentions of Torture, Struggling, Possessive Behavior, Kidnapping, and Toxic Unhealthy Mindset.

A/N: Admittedly speaking, I've rewritten this numerous times but I'm not satisfied with it—I just hope that it's understandable tho.

The scene for this story is a very old draft from my archived notes and thought I'd use it for this request & revise it, or try to. I just enjoy, recycling old and abandoned ideas. Like, taking them and using them for certain aspects of my stories.

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The tall and unkempt grass tickled the King's legs which caused him to giggle cheerfully, The breeze, wafting with the scent of peaches, brushed against his skin, and patches of light brown fur.

A soft smile appeared on his face, when he heard small monkeys, following his trail, then proceeded to roll around the tall grass and attempted to catch the sage's attention, by making high-pitched noises or, offered his favorite pink coloured fruit.

He chuckled in amusement and took one bite, the sweet taste overfilling his tastebuds, making him more energized and got encouraged to dash across the meadows, jumping through rocks and Landing on boulders, to avoid the mud getting to his feet. The others, soon, followed him closely.

Wukong, was having the time of their life and enjoyed the sense of peacefulness that this mountain gave off. They never felt lonely, with his companions, and people, from afar worshipped him. The city even made numerous adaptations about him, that he'd binge-watch all those cheesy movies and series with his successor, every night, or when MK, had time too.

Near the waterfalls, The chestnut-hued monkey stopped in his tracks for a moment and glanced on top, to stare at the blue sky, the clouds rolling by forming shapes, into abstract blobs. It was a beautiful scenery that most people took granted, and he was no exception, but times like this, He tried to remind himself that 'little things should be valued' or, tried to follow it, the best he can.

When thinking about his previous self morals, The Self-Proclaimed Sage chuckled, but not like his usual vibrant and arrogant one, This one was more vain and just, plain bitter. The Immortal being, cursed himself greatly for hours on end for falling for the, most gullible tricks and opened his dried-up, eyes.

Almost losing that spark in his golden pupils.

Wukong slumped down, and uncomfortably leaned against the cold and grey concrete walls, as what he saw, was just a distant memory but honestly speaking., The once great king contemplated, whether it was a memory or just a dream, either way, It was the only thing that kept him going....To see the outside once more and run around the meadow before the unfortunate happens.

It didn't matter how much time passed, The determination and hope, in his eye, refused to leave him. Monkie King, trusted his prodigy enough that he'll come and rescue him from this dark realm.

There, was a lingering fear that he'd become a forgotten memory or someone that never existed in the first place, but couldn't voice out his thoughts about that internal to avoid getting heard by someone with six ears.

"Just a little longer" The, Former Great Sage's stylish blonde fur, was now disheveled and unkempt, multiple strands of it were sticking out due to the lack of grooming. "Kiddo, will come and save me"

No sound was heard, not even a droplet of water leaking, only his mumble about hope  The cellar was dark and secluded. The only light source his captor was kind enough to give was a wax candle that would lit up, whenever a certain someone might appear.

Speak of the devil, A six eared Monkey phased through the dark apparition, as if he was part of them and was just a ghastky figure with no solid body, The wax candle, lighting up and illuminated his more prominent feature.

"Did ya miss me, bud?" At every visit, Wukong wished it was his successor, MK, that actually came to rescue him instead of this sick bastard.

"Like, Hell I would" His captor, had a cocky smirk as usual, and  brought him a tray of food, specifically peaches but overtime, as the fruit was associated with the dark-furred monkey, The once great sage, began to loath it deeply.  "Just hearing you talk, gives me a headache"

The immortal being, wouldn't starve to death if he went on years, without having a crumb to eat but honestly, death was much better than having to see that coy smirk that bastard always had but knew he couldn't just give up on life even if he wanted to, He had to live, to see, to relive his old memories.

"Fiesty as usual. I, honestly prefer your more defenseless and unresponsive state."

There, were chains to keep the Monkey Demon captive and made sure to immobilize him, but to mostly make sure that he wouldn't beat Macaque to a pulp.

Of course, Simple chains, wouldn't lock this heaven wrecker down, for too long.

The problem, was the crown, painfully screwed on his head, It was a similar replica, to the artifact he wore when on a trip, with a monk. This one wasn't so painful as the original one but unfortunately, was enough to immobilize him for a short period of time.

The replica, was clamped tightly on his head, and would try to shrink by force, making it tighter by every passing minute, the bolts trying to pierce into his skull until a migraine formed.

What added pain to the bruise, was the mechanical crown, itself, was attached to a small device that sent lighting all over his body.

The shock, overpowered him, the excruciating pain, flowing all over his body, making it worse. It, was that single feature, which made it feel eerily similar to the original one, causing a surge of repressed memories to plague his mind. The represed memories, being his old companions.

It, was during those shock punishment, that made him remember them again, and this time. He, actually refused to repress the memories any longer and would, always remember them, not wanting his old crew to become a distant memory.

It was, some sort of coping mechanism, to help him deal with this .

But, that single second of invulnerability was enough for this bastard to seal him, and drag him away to the shawdows.

"Just screw off, Macaque. You're lucky that Red Boy even helped your sorry ass. If he haven't than you'd still be watching me like a creepy stalker"

Macaque paused for a moment, not saying a single word yet at that petty remark. Their steps were slow and it gave off a sophisticated vibe, per usual but they both knew it was all for show.

Just for the public eye, and to decieve others, wanting to represent himself as a misunderstood monkey, that was hurt.

But behind the closed doors, Macaque revealed his true colours behind, He was a cruel & heartless being. They, crouched down at Wukong's level and

kneeled down on one knee, tracing the long chain that wrapped around his 'beloveds' neck, with his tan-skinned fingers.

He, abruptly tugged on the neck chain which forced Monkie King to jerk forward, making him closer to Macaque's lips while he whispered in a low voice that was dripping with venom but was coated with sugar that can make anyone's teeth fall out. "Y'know, Maybe, You should stop those useless mumbling. MK, won't and will never save you" 

"And, You should know..This isn't love" Wukong croaked, feeling his throat dry since he hasn't drank water, knowing the liquid was drugged with chemicals or whatever potions.

"Love is just a selfish desire to have someone"

Oh how naive they were to trust this monster and Wukong sighed defeatedly, feeling frustrated, since he was one of the many people that fell to Macaque's charm, that single ounce of pity led to his demise as in this secluded room, The six-eared demon, was just a boy who cried wolf.

The dark-furred monkey kept on taunting him, knowing what type of strings to pull on his hostage.  "If his, Oh so great mentor can't even rescue himself, then what can a kid do? "

" That kid—is better than me."

The closeness, made Wukong feel his warmth, but it made him feel disgusted but the feeling wasn't mutual for the other male.

"Well, I'm better than both of you combined" Macaque, spoke with such ease as if capturing a male and taking their free will was normal.

"I doubt that. Just wait till MK comes here, and kicks your ass, and we'll never have to see each other again" The anthropomorphic monkey, sent another petty remark, but what triggered his captor was the sentence

"Never, see each other again"

This time, There was a long pause.

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