#love when brains hijack my fingers

[quiveringdeer]

alright now that's out the way, tending to my unfortunately scale afflicted monstera deliciosa had me thinking back to that first camera roll challenge I posted with Reiner.

The idea of him getting a little plant after a suggestion from his therapist. Something to livin up his apartment a bit and also that will require him to take care of but isn't as demanding in care as an animal. Which he just couldn't fathom being a caretaker for in his current mental state.

And so he gets that first little plant. Probably a pothos cause they're pretty forgiving no matter if you overwater, underwater, and have minimal sunlight.

And the plant is doin pretty good after he follows googled instructions on the proper size pot to start it off in considering how big the nursery pot was.

A couple weeks have gone by and he comes home to see two of the lower leaves turned yellow! Did this happen while he was gone? Has he not been paying enough attention? What does yellow leaves mean? Has he killed it already? He's spiraling and immediately texting Bert and Pieck in their group chat. The one without Porco and Annie cause sometimes you just need to surround yourself with nice, generally positive folks ok.

Pieck is reassuring him that she's sure his plant will be ok. As soon as Bert gets the texts he's googling the meaning of yellowing leaves. Something Reiner would've done if he wasn't currently spiraling in worry and fret after not even being able to keep one little plant alive more than a month. Is he really so awful? Why do these bad things keep happening to him? Obviously he probably deserves it but now he's feeling guilty that this innocent plant got caught in the crossfire of his shitty life!

Bert:

Bert: Looks like too much water, maybe. Is the soil soggy?

Reiner goes to check and well, soggy would be a strong word to use...but yeah it's soggy.

Rei: I killed my plant with water. I thought that was impossible? Aren't they supposed to be immune? 😣

Bert: I think that's just in Pokémon. And not necessarily immune, more like, resistant.

Rei: 😞😞😞😞

Rei: can't even keep track of what's real or fake anymore

Pieck: what is really "real" anyway?

Rei: 🙁😟😓

Bert: If the soil is extremely saturated, it says best course of action is to repot it.

Pieck: i can bring you a new pot and some soil reiner!

Rei: I'd appreciate that Pieck. But what if I just keep fucking up? Maybe you should just take the plant back to your place.

Pieck: you've got this reiner! lots of new plant parents tend to overlove their new plants with watering its all about balance

Pieck: pock's gonna bring me over soon!

Pieck: he won't be staying but he says hi!

To which Reiner is grateful cause that's the last thing he needed right now. And he doubted Porco actually told Pieck to tell him hi. But before he could figure out how to respond to that Bert responds.

Bert: I can come over after work too.

Rei: Thanks. Both of you. 💙

--------

Alright that turned into not what I had planned but anywho,

Eventually Rei ends up finding that balance of nurturing and letting it be, focusing on other things instead, like his own personal health. And once he gets the hang of that, he adds a few more plants to his home and becomes an active member on one of those fb plant groups (Pieck invites him to some) and finds a really supportive group of friends in that community!

[visionsofcarnality]

Make-A-Wish

Summary: You ask your boyfriend to fuck you as his vigilante persona. Oh… and the helmet stays on. 🫵❤️

Warnings: Rough sex, Jaybird is a meanie in this one, degradation, name calling, use of slùt and whöre. Crude language, crying, ass slapping, piv sex, unprotected sex (wrap it b4 you tap it this is tumblr where people don’t get pregnant or STDs), cræmpie, slight overstim, Jason’s baby bird helmet hair.

a/n: i saw this pop up in my feed and i have to say this idea hijacked all common sense in my brain. I hope i did you justice- @smutinlove

(mdni below the cut, I am dead serious)

“Is this what you fucking wanted?” Was growled in your ear through the voice modulator installed in the helmet that you could currently feel pressing against the side of your head while the man wearing it pounded into you from behind. “You wanted the Red Hood? You fucking got it, bitch…” His sentence trailed off into a groan when you clenched around him from the harsh words.

“Fuck… You like this shit?” His thrusts were punishing, driving your legs even farther apart than you’d already stretched them, back forced into an arch by one of his big, thick hands on your spine.

You had no response for him, mewling and babbling into the dark sheets that you tried to grip between your scrambling fingers, simultaneously trying to push back onto him and pull yourself off.

“Jay-“ You cried, and the word was cut off when he used his other gloved hand to grip your hair, pulling you up by the nape of your neck so your chest was flush against his back.

“I don’t know who you’re calling for, princess.” He teased cruelly into your ear while the hand that had previously taken residence on your back circled around your shaking thighs to the little spot between your legs that made you see stars. “Is that good? That feel good? Such a dirty fucking whore for me, yeah?” He panted through the helmet, hot metal replacing what would have been hot breath on your neck.

“You like fucking the Red Hood?” He jeered, a dark chuckle escaping the covered mouth behind you. “Yeah, you fucking love this shit. Get off on being treated like a slut?” You couldn’t even respond with the way he was fucking you, forcing the flesh between your thighs to part and your body to take more and more of his fat fucking cock. He wasn’t the longest you’d had, but he definitely was the thickest. No matter how he tried to prepare you you always felt him for days after he fucked you… Especially like this. Your poor cunt would no doubt be dripping, leaking, and bruised tomorrow morning.

The thought alone triggered your orgasm and you came with a high, keening cry. Pussy damn-near crushing his cock as he continued thrusting, working your exhausted body through the waves of ecstasy. The sound of skin on wet skin filled the room as your cunt gushed and creamed for him, creating a white ring around the base of his cock as evidence of his prowess. Through the helmet he looked down quickly to watch your spasming pussy continue to spread around his cock. Your pretty little lips sucking him in while your muscles tried to push him out.

“That’s it, baby, fucking soak it.” He encouraged, finally getting tired of the helmet and yanking it from his head with one gloved hand. Underneath he was damp with sweat and condensation from his ragged breathing as he fucked you. Still, he fucked you, wringing the last dregs of pleasure from your body and starting another race to the peak. “Thought i’d let you off that easy?” He spoke into your ear, finally feeling his lips instead of metal on your skin. He took your earlobe into his teeth, biting the flesh with a nip like a kitten.

“Not gonna stop until you’re fucking screaming.” And scream you did, especially when his teeth sank into the flesh of the top of your shoulder as he came. The hot, wet feeling of his orgasm inside you triggered the second orgasm and you stopped making sounds that could be described as human.

He rutted against you still, torturing you both with the pleasure until you were sure it was more pain than sensation. Still he ground his pelvis against yours, so you could feel his heavy balls against your pussy as he emptied himself for all he was worth, painting your insides with the evidence of your mutual depravity.

Finally, after what felt like years he let go of your hair, letting you collapse to the bed gently, his other arm lowering you gently so as to not hurt your nose.

When he was assured you were able to let your weight onto the mattress he finally pulled out, moaning under his breath at the cold air on his previously cozy cock that was now creamy and shiny with your mixed juices. With both hands he harshly gripped the globes of your ass and lifted gently, exposing your ruined and still-twitching hole to his hungry eyes. Especially when the first drop of milky white cum appeared at your entrance and slid down to your clit where it hung like a pearly stalactite before plummeting to the sheets. Jason loved to watch his cum pour out of your cunt after you’d been thoroughly fucked out on his cock, something about the sight made him almost ready to go again at that exact second.

Only your soft sounds of requested affection broke him from the trance and he abandoned his show to laze down beside you, grabbing a soft tissue from beside the bed and cleaning between your legs before more of him dripped onto the sheets.

“How you doing baby?” He crooned gently, so at odds with how he’d spoken to you during the act. He gently ran a hand over your head and waited for your words.

The laugh that came out of him was enough to shake the building when you held up a singular hand for a high five.

[bcyhoods]

hi! can I please request the prompt “caressing the other's cheek softly, hoping to wake them up that way” with steve and shy!reader? maybe it’s their first time waking up together and he’s just so in love?

thank you for the req nonnieeee <333 need him in my bed immediately, thanks! | 0.5k gn!reader

Steve can’t seem to put his finger on it.

Maybe you were born with some sort of super power. Like you’re able to induce serenity with just a touch of your fingertips, a timid press of your lips to his cheek. Or it could be something spiritual. Something about your souls being intertwined due to something living in the stars or the color of your aura or something.

He doesn’t really know. Waking up to you in his bed for the first time makes his brain all fuzzy.

The sun spills in through his blinds and covers every inch of your exposed skin in golden warmth. Your hair is wild, splayed out over his pillowcase — which he’s sure now smells like your shampoo. You’d slowly inched apart from each other during the night, but your hand still rests over his torso, accidentally bunching up the material of his shirt around your fingertips. The longer he lets himself look at you, the harder his heart thrashes around in his chest.

He doesn’t really want to wake you, but he so desperately wants to talk to you. With a tentative hand, he trails up your arm to cup your jaw. His thumb gently passes back and forth over the swell of your cheekbone, reveling in the softness of your skin. A blithe grin hijacks his mouth once he sees you beginning to stir.

“Hmm.” Your hand is gone from his torso to grasp onto his own hand, still just barely caressing your face. You blink a few times, adjusting to the brightness filtering in when you see his face. Warmth settles on his freckled cheeks and paints his skin pink, and it only gets deeper when you give him your own sleepy smile. “Morning.”

“Good morning,” he answers, voice raspy and deep.

He’s looking at you like he can find an answer in your eyes. You might have the entire universe hiding in your pupils. Definitely something akin to stardust shines in them, he swears.

His attention makes you feel lightheaded and your skin burns beneath his touch. You squeeze at his fingers and pucker your lips to fruitlessly keep your nerves at bay, but it produces a kind of upside-down grin that makes him beam and chuckle. You giggle and ask, “What are you doing?”

“Nothin’. Just wanna look at you.”

“Ugh,” you groan and roll your eyes, but the wide smile on your face reveals your secret. Steve Harrington makes your stomach flutter and makes your heart beat so erratically that you can feel it thump and shake against every inch of your body. That’s why you’re quick to shield your face with your hands, muffling your nervous giggles in your palms.

“Oh, stop.” Peeling your hands away from your face, he brings them up to his lips and kisses your knuckles, unceremoniously. The smacking sounds make you laugh, and when he notices, he makes sure to kiss them louder. He stops the assault on your hands to cup them together and press them against his chest.

His heart beats as quickly as yours does.

“I liked sleeping with you,” you tell him with a gummy smile like it was confidential.

“Yeah?”

You’re immediately recognizing the double entendre, but he’s too lovesick to notice. You consume his every thought, it’s impossible to get his mind working accurately. So instead of teasing you, he whispers

“I liked sleeping with you, too, honey.”

[raguonmynieceandnephew]

"It's so unfair to the Rat Grinders that they are killed instantly and the Bad Kids get to roll death saves." SHUT UUUUUUUUUUUUP

THIS IS LONG, AND HONESTLY FOR MYSELF, SO YEAH READ IF YOU WANT

I swear to god, this discourse is going to fucking be the end of me. Idk what kind of mind boggling spell Brennan Lee Mulligan wove into the fabric of the universe that spread through the data center of Dropout in order to absolutely hijack y'all's brains when it comes to Cocklord Assgape and her ragtag of character foils but whatever it was has made you Rat Grinder stans INSUFFERABLE in this site.

The levels of treating fictional characters as if they were real people have reached a level I honestly have never anticipated, to the point of y'all actually being mad AT THE CAST for "mistreating" them and ACTUALLY QUESTION BRENNAN'S CAPACITY TO DM. Do you not get how fucking insane that is?

We can't make fun of Copperkettle, one of the most pathetic, petty and incompetent villains in D20 history anymore (even though she is masterfully written and developed to generate this reaction from us) anymore because it's bullying apparently. I saw an account flip the fuck out because someone compared her rivalry with Kristen to Drake and Kendrick's beef. KIPPERLILY IS NOT A REAL GIRL. SHE IS A MAKE BELIEVE CHARACTER IN AN IMPROV SHOW SPAWNED FROM THE BRAIN OF A 36 YEAR OLD MAN

And then what truly pissed me off the MOST about this whole hell is the fact that, being chronically online avid consumers of this goddamn show, I would think you would have but a grasp of the main cast of characters' characterization.

Why the uproar about Riz saying they should chop Oisin's head off? The same Riz who tortured that pixie from Freshman year by shooting off their finger one by one? The same Riz who murked a disarmed and unconscious Coach Daybreak without battin an eye? The same Riz who ATE THE CORPSE OF KALVAXUS?

And the whole Fabian vs Ivy debacle MY GOD, THE GIRL WAS RACIST TO HIS GIRLFRIEND AND USED HER LAST BREATH TO CALL MAZEY "OBJECTIVELY UGLY". And the funniest thing is that is not even the most unhinged shit he has ever said.

And finally, Death Save Gate: THE RAT GRINDERS ARE NOT PLAYER CHARACTERS. THEY ARE NPCS! THE RULES FOR EACH WORK DIFFERENTLY, ESPECIALLY THEM BEING BOSS ENCOUNTERS. Imagine having to still hit Ivy or Oisin 2 more times to kill them when there is 14 foot tall Porter throwing legendary actions left and right, with Jace, and other 3 spell casters + Mary Ann and KLCK up and running. It's called balancing the fucking game. Also, game masters are entitled to break, mold and make up any rules they want if they find necessary in order to service themselves and their players. IF YOU PLAY WITH ALL THESE RULES AS THEY COME, GOOD FOR YOU AND YOUR TABLE. THIS IS NOT YOUR TABLE.

Not only is Brennan DMing for his CLOSEST FRIENDS EVER, he is also shooting and producing an ENTIRE TV SHOW. So yeah, i think he knows wtf he is doing.

"But the Ratgrinders had no real development": True. But it wasn't for lack of trying from the players. Everytime they tried to know more, the dice didn't let them, so they decided to focus on the mystery. It simply do be like that sometimes.

"But they are just kids!": And so were Penelope, Dayne, Ragh, Zayn, the Bloodrush Players, Aelwyn and Biz. Why wasn't it a problem then? Because most of them were evil to some extent and were about to bring the fucking apocalypse to the world? Yeah, sounds familiar right? And the ones who were manipulated or had any sort of redemption worked their way into earning it, right? Yeah.

In conclusion, I fucking love the Rat Grinders, I truly do, and not unlike 90% of this website, i'm still holding on to hope that they have any sort of development and redemption in the last episode, because I agree, they ARE children and they WERE manipulated by Porter and Jace, but like, can we also agree that they are fucking assholes and had it fucking coming? Also, the BKs are children too y'know. SO STOP BEING FUCKING ANNOYING.

[muntitled]

Req - Something about Shotaro? Oh my god anything, your writing is just so????;!!;?$3

Maybe some smut on the toxic-ish side about how he appeals to be a loving boyfriend to your friends but behind closed doors he’s a lot more intimidating/manipulative, but you’re still just so weak for him (maybe even more so because of it???) and just can’t control yourself around him. Idk, I’m literally clueless but I just know I need that immaculate brain of yours combined with Taro!!!

Much love, and Happy New Year!!!

A/n: I'm not gonna lie... This took a good chunk of my sanity trying to write, I can only hope that you like it. Also happy new yearrr

𝗣𝗶𝗰𝘁𝘂𝗿𝗲 𝗣𝗲𝗿𝗳𝗲𝗰𝘁

Osaki Shotaro x Fem!Reader

Summary: Shotaro is your golden retriever boyfriend... until he isn't

Warnings: Language, Established Relationship, Jealousy, Best friend!Sohee, Possessiveness, Slight Dark fic, Toxic!Relationship, Manipulation, Smut (+18) Dom!Shotaro, Fingering, Grinding, Choking, Teasing

Your shoulders are as rigid as two metal cinder blocks, keeping your head from rolling off onto the floor. Barbed wires twist with anxiety in the pit of your stomach because you know, despite the sunshine disposition, despite the smile, despite the glassy doe eyes, Shotaro is pissed, and he definitely wants you to know about it.

“I swear on my unborn child,” Sohee, your best friend (your best guy friend) exclaims over a mouthful of ramen, “Yours is the only man I'd ever let cook for me. The rest of the male population can choke.”

While Shotaro basks in Sohee's praises with a modest sunshine smile, you sigh under the pressure of your boyfriend's grip on your thigh as you swiftly say, “You're quite literally a member of said male population-”

Sohee lowers his chopsticks before assuming a vaguely threatening stance with his cheeks round and stuffed. “Begrudgingly,” he says, “Not by choice.” You do not laugh but you try to.

Sohee bounces up and down in his seat, seemingly oblivious to your nervousness and Shotaro's skillfully hidden vexation.

“This is why I needed you two to end up together.” Says Sohee, swinging his head towards you. “My Golden Retriever best friend,” he swings his head towards Shotaro, “And my Golden Retriever coworker-”

“It's getting late, Sohee-” Shotaro's voice is calm and his head is still tilted as he says, “Should I call your uber?” You gulp silently as Shotaro's hand rubs up and down your thigh in a dizzying motion.

“Not very Golden Retriever of you,” Sohee grumbles before slurping down the last of his soup, “But that's okay because you're perfect in everything else-”

“Are you trying to steal my boyfriend, Sohee?” You hope cracking a joke might alleviate some of the one sided tension only you seem to be aware of.

Despite the smile, Shotaro is having a very difficult time remaining patient, especially because he had plans. Before Sohee had hijacked your attention, Shotaro would venture to say that he was actually somewhat happy at the start of the evening… before he found himself sharing your time with your over exuberant best friend.

There was a lively, almost vibrant pep in his step when he got off work, despite the tiredness in his muscles. As Shotaro made his way down the corridor towards your apartment door, his head was bowed with his eyes glued on his phone.

Your whimpers resounded in the clarity of his headphones. He watched you cum around his fingers, absolutely transfixed- so transfixed he almost doesn't recognize movement in his periphery right when he reaches your front door.

Far too swiftly, Shotaro plastered a smile on his face as he paused the video, dropped his phone into his pocket and lowered his headphones before bowing to your elderly next door neighbour.

He muttered a polite “안녕하세요,” in greeting, and the tiny old woman responded just as amicably.

She, as well as every other person in your life is absolutely floored by his politeness.

“What a nice young man,” she said, as she continued her way down the corridor, leaving Shotaro chuckling to himself because the thoughts he was having were certainly kilometres off on what a nice young man should be thinking.

He could not help that he had been thinking about you the whole day. Not even just sexually. (Although he did miss your body terribly. Shotaro was absolutely obsessed with the way it worked: You were always so unmistakably pliant for him. Like clay). Even simply being this close to your space made his heart overblown with satisfaction. Your house had always been somewhat of a safety enclosure for him. His own little piece of peace away from the outside world.

As he inserted the password and turned the knob, Shotaro imagined how you'd be waiting for him after work by the door like you usually did. Swimming in his oversized shirt as you stood with your arms opened wide.

None of those things happened.

Shotaro trudged into your house, sweaty and physically defeated from another day of exerting himself with rigorous routine. The thought of melting into your arms had been the only thing keeping him vaguely upright, when all he wanted to do was collapse on a pile on the floor.

As he proceeded to kick his sneakers off at the door, Shotaro’s brain nearly short circuitrd at the sight of you standing before him… fully dressed.

Not for any reason beside the fact that he had hoped to find you dressed comfortably enough to touch each other while you both cuddled lazily on the couch.

He was not being unreasonable in his expectations.

“Are we supposed to be going somewhere?” Shotaro asked quizzically with his doe eyes widened in cute curiosity. He eyed your halter neck and maxi skirt with much discontent.

“Oh good! You're home! I actually have something to-” Before the words could escape your mouth, he immediately enclosed you in a hug that you drowned in.

“Missed you so much,” he murmured before splaying various sloppy kisses on the side of your face, “Couldn't stop thinking about you the whole day… your face-” A kiss, “Your mouth-” another kiss, “your boobs-”

“Taro, I have to tell you som-”

“God, I hate people!” he exclaimed above you with his arms falling to your hips.

“I shouldn't have to remind you that I count as people.” You jest in vague nervousness.

“When I say I hate people, never ever, do I mean you,” he whispered above you before patting your head down as if you were, less his human girlfriend and more something that went about its life on four legs.

“Do I count as people?”

Your shoulders stiffened and Shotaro's arms grew rigid as his head snapped up to look at your best friend- his co-worker.

Sohee makes his introduction behind you in the same outfit Shotaro saw him in at dance practice and he waved lightly.

Shotaro's shoulders sag infinitesimally but that smile on his face is all too permanent.

Sohee spinned around before mumbling, “Also I'd appreciate it if you two didn't hump each other out in the open for my viewing pleasure.”

Instead of actually feeling compelled to eat you now sit idly at the dinner table, picking and prodding at the ramen Shotaro has prepared for you all.

Your boyfriend's irritation is subtle and you could definitely miss it in the brightness of his overall countenance.

“I mean, it's not that I don't wanna be in a relationship- it's just that, seeing you two has inspired me… I guess you could say?” If it weren't for Shotaro's hand on your thigh you might have actually listened to the countless praises he dotes on Shotaro.

Praises about how good of a man he is. How perfect he is. How absolutely wonderful he must be for being able to put up with you.

All through the dinner, Sohee talks and talks, and you sit with your fingers curled around the end of the table, trying to stop yourself from not reacting to your boyfriend’s minstritations.

It is only when the dinner ends, and Shotaro escorts Sohee to the door, that you finally feel the first real signs of anxiety begin to solidify in your gut.

You're trying your best to load the plates into the dishwasher with a steady hand when you feel a daunting presence behind you. Evading eye contact, you swiftly and succinctly say, “I'm sorry. He had no where else to go-”

“He has a house. Try again.”

You sigh, letting your eyes flutter shut at the coldness in his voice.

“He's my best friend, Shotaro,” you say with finality before straightening your spine and turning to face him. You’re both pressed on opposite ends of the kitchen. Both with your arms folded.

“I don't really like your friends.” He says.

“I don't think my friends should be your problem, is what I'm saying.” You clarify. “And anyway, I thought you’d like the fact that Sohee’s my friend.”

Shotaro Scoffs as he says, “I'd like it more if he didn't try to inject himself into our relationship, babe.” Shotaro's voice is incredibly calm, but his words are aimed like an arrow doused in poison, as he closes the distance between you two. Your attention is fixed on him as he lifts his hand to trace small lines on your exposed collar, and you nearly fight the urge to make your eyes flutter shut.

“Not to sound like a tired fucking cliche but, I'm just thinking about what's best for you-” That snaps you out of it.

“What's best for me or what's best for you?!" You exclaim before slapping his hand away.

If only you knew how badly that particular passive-aggressive action affected him. Shotaro crowds you against the counter as he pushes his front up against yours until he's quite literally peering down at you. You refuse to crane your neck back and look up at him.

He was being ridiculous.

“I'm not choosing between you or my friends, Taro-”

“You're so pretty, you know that?” His completey-out-of-left-field comment, especially layered with that sweet-as-honey voice of his, shoots straight to your core, and you grab the counter behind you for support. “And smart too,” he says, before trailing his hand down your arm, eliciting a trail of goosebumps in his wake. Shotaro’s touch is not only sensual, but its molten fucking lava and it nearly has you melting into a puddle on the floor.

“So I trust you to make your own decisions.” He says, nodding with cute finality before lifting your face up by your chin.

“Taro…” Your heart resorts to frenzy, and your head flies backward when Shotaro drifts his fingers past the seams of your maxi skirt. His are fingers- quite literally making their descent down your underwear while you remain too dumb to do anything but say: “I-I knew Sohee before I knew you.”

He only pushes up against you further, letting his hand grip the side of your neck. “You really think now is a good time to throw that in my face?” He asked with a tilt of his head and his hand now sliding over your cunt.

“You're not wet,” he whispers, “Why aren't you wet?” Before you're ever able able to answer, Shotaro drops to his knees before picking up the ends of your billowing skirt and disappearing underneath the fabric. A torrid gasp escapes your throat when his warm breath skates over your cunt and you're once again throwing your head back in absolute ecstasy.

He pokes his head up from underneath your skirt, cute smile on display while his fingers massage your aching clit. “You're always so wet for me, baby," he says with a childish frown, "What's the matter, huh?” He tilts his head again. “Is it your friend?”

He asks casually, as if his middle finger was not easing its way past your entrance … as if he his fingers were not already drenched in your arousal in less than a minute. “Fuck, Shotaro-”

“Is it because of him?” He continues to ask, now fully moving his fingers in and out of yoy while he remained on his knees- gaze never once wavering. “I'm sorry, bunny,” He says with faux concern, “I didn't know Sohee meant so much to you!”

“F-Fuck Taro-”

At the sound of his name, Shotaro's other hand grips your thigh, only opening your legs wider to split you all the way open against his fingers rough minstriations. He alternates between his middle and index. Sometimes splitting you open with both, until you were thoroughly bucking forward, to the pace that he had set and you were chasing your own orgasm furiously.

“You look like you're gonna cum for me, baby!” He exclaims with big bright eyes and a wide open smile. Equal parts adorable and completely fucking manic.

“Ask me to cum,” he whispers, still looking up at you like you were the best toy he could've ever hope to get. “I control your body. I control every part of you.” He says, “So ask me-”

“Please, Taro!- P-Please can I come?” Your hands have long ago found purchase in his blonde locks and you squeeze your eyes shut, bucking into him at a frenzied pace.

“Look at how pretty you are when you're following orders!” He exclaims as if you truly were a child. “So pretty,” he’s absolutely mesmerising, “My pretty girl gets to cum all over my fingers-”

You've already jumped off the cliff, letting your hips stutter as your eyes roll to the back of your head.

Shotaro's eyes appear almost pained by the sight in front of him. How easily you break for him. Whenever he wanted. You truly were in control of his entire being.

“G-God-” Your failed attempt at talking brings a wave of warmth over Shotaro's countenance, and he finds himself pleasantly satisfied once again. He lifts himself up to his full height.

“what a gorgeous girl,” he whispers before pushing his forehead against yours, “My gorgeous girl,” he murmurs before sliding his fingers - the fingers that were once inside you- past your trembling lips.

[penvisions]

wish i never met you {a garnish one shot}

Pairing: Chef! Joel Miller x Professor! Reader (formally known as Bartender! Reader)

Summary: Fear of rejection and messing up so beyond comprehension makes you regret crossing the professional line and getting to know Joel as you do now.

Word Count: 1.6k

Warnings: canon typical language, joel thinks he's the one in charge but we all know it's really reader, religious contemplation, mentions of past trauma, mentions of bad family dynamics, smoking, consumption of alcohol, menstruation, talk of menstruation, blood, cramps, muscle soreness, unorthodox pregnancy announcement, reader is a hot mess, allusions to adult content, allusions to smut, mentions of past p in v, might need to add more if i missed anything!

A/N: wrote this as part of a fun, silly fic title prompt game submission from a sweet anon. it totally inspired an angsty din piece at first that i have in my drafts but then these two slammed into my brain and hijacked the idea. i just love them, your honor. i have so much love for them. NOW I KNOW THIS SUBJECT MATTER ISN'T FOR EVERYONE, I REALLY DEBATED POSTING THIS OVER THE LAST FEW DAYS BC I KNOW IT'S NOT EVERYONE'S CUP OF TEA but i feel like this is a good trajectory for these two, truly. i'm so sorry if anyone disagrees with the direction i took this in and i hopei t doesn't take away from the original series for y'all

ao3 link || series masterlist || main masterlist || ko-fi

“No, fuck off.” Was the quick response to a wide palm caressing over your back. You were hunched over your crossed legs on the couch, aware of how bad the position was for your posture. But it was the only way to find any relief on your aching back. You had thought it was cramps at first, really, but then you realized all the symptoms of your monthly cycle fell in line with something else when the bleeding never started.

“Excuse me, darlin’? You sure you wanna use that language with me?” Joel’s deep voice was tinged with an edge, giving you the chance to retract your expletives. You were never so outright with your denial, never wanting to deny the man a few feet away. But the way in which you had expressed it to an obviously exhausted Joel was maybe too bold for the late hour. But you didn’t take it, instead repeating yourself.

“Kindly, fuck off. Don’t touch me.” You pulled away from him, hunching lower under his hand to break the contact.

“That’s not much better, ya know.” Joel’s hands shifted to his waist, a thick brow raised as he took in the sight of you nearly balled up, the faint light of the screen lighting up your face as you ignored him.

A harsh contraction of your muscles had you groaning out, “I wish I never met you.”

“C’mon now, you don’t mean that.” Joel huffed, trying to keep his calm, but you knew it was hard for him even if you really didn’t feel all that good. You never took your pain or frustration out on him like this, it was always soft murmurs of ‘hold me’ or ‘can I borrow your warmth’. Never the way you were reacting now.

“I don’t know what’s gotten into y-“ His mouth snapped shut, eyes focusing on the screen. On the words you had typed into the search engine. Normally he would tease you over the typos, your fingers not working as quick as you mind for all the grace and focus you normally had to expertly wield a sharp knife.

 Your heart thumped at the sudden silence. The fizzling tension that had filled the room.

“Don’t!” You gasped out, slamming the laptop closed and shielding the device with your body completely.

“Darlin’…” You swore you could hear the cogs turning in his head. Thinking back on the depraved as desperate way you had been seeking him out when he returned home from a late shift at the restaurant even despite the haze of sleep, in the mornings before you had to peel yourself away to go to campus, the photos you had brazenly sent him without warning that had him shielding or turning his phone over throughout the day. Thinking back on the way you had been inhaling food at any occasion, none of your normal contemplation or silence after what you considered a binge. Thinking back on the way you had begun to complain of your work clothing feeling wrong and too tight on your aching body as you dressed in the morning.

When he moved to sit on the other side of the couch, far too close for comfort, you shied away and pressed your back into the arm on your end.

“Not gonna touch ya, you have my word.” He raised his hands placatingly, his expression so soft that the tears burst from you without warning.

“You do-don’t wanna touch me. Not anymo-more.” Hiccups jolted your body, making the skin you were already uncomfortable in tingle. “I ruined ev-everything.”

He regarded you with a small frown, his plush lips pulled down as he clasped his hands together in his lap. Just as he opened his mouth to speak the words flew from you.

“I remember what you said, on the line.” You narrowed your eyes at him as they echoed in your head.

‘It had been a slow day, prep and cleaning taking over most of the evening shift. It had been back before you had taken on a role in the kitchen. Sneaking fries from the bowl of them on the expo line. They hadn’t been hot or even salted, but they were better than snacking on the fruity garnishes at the bar.

He had been passing the time with who you hadn’t known at the time was his brother, Tommy. Who had driven into the city to help take a look at the empty lot beside the restaurant, both of them contemplating the construction of a patio. But they had ended up in the kitchen, hunger too strong a call.

While Joel was on the line, Tommy was beside you, sneaking fries with a wink in your direction. But you ignored him, focused on looking through the catalogue of one of your vendors. Trying to make a seasonal menu. But your ears caught the harsh grunt of the man your eyes trailed over in the midst of busy nights.

“Wouldn’t do it, no.”

“C’mon, you seriously tellin’ me you wouldn’t baby sit for me if I were to gift you with a niece or nephew.”

“No, ‘m too old. Hire a babysitter.”

“You’re full of it ‘n you know it.”

“Brother, a baby is a lot of work. Now, your baby? Even more so.” Joel leveled his brother with a look that silenced any other argument on the matter.’

The moment he realized what you were talking about, his brows flew up into his hairline and he breathed out a hearty chuckle.

“Darlin’, I was just givin’ him a hard time. You gotta know that.”

“I didn’t know you.” You stood up from the couch, body protesting the movement. Cupping a hand over your mouth, you breathed harshly as you tried to tamp down a bout of nausea. “And now that I do, I’m gonna have to consider literally everything on my own and I’m gonna hate how much it hurts to not know you any longer. I wish I-“

“No,” He sighed, brow furrowing before he pinned you with a serious expression. “You do know me now and I wouldn’t turn my back on you, on this. I’m in it, pretty girl, no matter what you decide to do.”

When you whipped away from him, shuddering breaths wracking your sore body, the crack of your voice on a sob spurred him into motion. His arms came around you slowly, giving you the chance to retreat if it wasn’t something you wanted. But you let him, the feel of his chest warm and soothing on your aching back. The push of his soft stomach comforting. His chin hooked over a shoulder, and he spoke in such a somber tone.

“Darlin’, I always thought I was too old to do this again. But I haven’t crossed fifty quite yet and the thought of you carrying my child, of loving me and my child. God, I would give anything for it to be our future. To see you blossom into yourself more, to show our baby the same devotion you give to everything in your life, you deserve somewhere to put all your love.”

One of his hands moved over the one you had on your middle. Holding you so secure, holding you both so secure.

“Joel…it’s a lot. It’s….we’re not even-“ You turned in his arms, facing him. His beautiful, open expression so full of love and adoration, all of it for you. Your heart melted in your chest, dripping low to flutter in your stomach. You weren’t even overtly religious, left over from the trauma of your childhood. Of being forced to attend mass and important holidays alongside your grandparents. The denial of your father never urging you to seek out a higher power in replacement. But the thought of technically being single and going through something like this. It made you afraid.

“There’s a ring in my sock drawer. Got it the day of our first do over date. ‘s why I was so close to the campus. It’s yours. I’m yours. This could be yours. But only if you want it.” Joel’s forehead lightly thumped against yours as he pressed in close. His breath a warm wash over your face, smelling faintly of cigarette smoke.

Looking between each of his eyes, searching for any hint of hesitancy from him it was quiet. When you didn’t find any, you felt a smile pull at your lips as you nodded your head in affirmation. Wet laughter bubbling up as his lips pressed to yours, a smile of his own for you to feel on them.

“But I still expect you to propose, can’t skip any steps with me. I know you think you’re hot shit with being crowned the city’s most prolific chef of the year but I swear to-“

He cut you off with another kiss, his moustache ticking your upper lip as he nipped at your bottom one.

“I don’t wanna miss any steps with ya, darlin’. I’m here for ‘em all.”

It was hard to ignore the stirring of other feelings in your body, drowning out the aches and pains. But when realization hit you, you pulled back with wide eyes.

“We’re gonna have to stop drinking and smoking!”

“We?”

taglist: @tuquoquebrute @jessthebaker @littlemisspascal @76bookworm76 @hiddenbabynyc @clevergirl74 @anavatazes @samiamproductions @sarap-77 @honeyedmiller @undercoverpena

[that-foul-legacy-lover]

AUGHHHH look I live laugh love Legacy but Childe got me thinking...

So you know how Legacy often hijacks Childe to do stuff when he wants out???

Childe hijacking Legacy because he wants to say "i love you too" back :')

And Legacy not even minding one bit because he desperately wants you to know that yesss that's what he means ToT

Wifi I am inconsolably in love with both of them :')

oh. my. goodness. comrade, i cannot tell you how this thought has wormed and nestled into my brain oh my god this is amazing

just imagine, you snuggling with Foul Legacy, your back pressed against his chest and his arms around your waist. it's a quiet, peaceful sort of cuddling, the type that needs no words except your drowsy mumbles that you love them; Childe and Foul Legacy. you feel Legacy's claws tighten slightly around you, nuzzling his face against your neck, and carefully you tilt your head back so you can cup his plated cheeks, looking at him upside down. with a sleepy smile and a content gleam in your eyes, you say that you love him, enunciating each word as clearly as you can, and you feel Legacy's wings begin to rapidly flutter around you as he chirps; once, twice, thrice

suddenly there's a poof and a shift in the atmosphere, the arms around your waist now considerably smaller and less sharp as Childe hums, his nose buried in your hair. he turns you around so you're face-to-face, leaving light kisses as random as his freckles on your cheeks and forehead. the soft pecks make you laugh in surprise, Childe wrapping his scarf around both of you so he can hug you even closer, a subtle sparkle in his usually dim eyes as he leans closer and presses his forehead to yours

"I love you, too."

a smile spreads across your face, cheeks warm, and you give Childe's hands a light squeeze, his fingers lacing with yours as he smiles back, bright as the sun. Foul Legacy purrs steadily in his mind, not at all angry, and the Eleventh Harbinger feels finally at peace

[lady-october]

Pairing : Oli Sykes x Female Assistant Genre : Romance, Smut (18+ Only) Previous Chapters : Available on Ao3

Story Content : Smut, Drama, Choking, Power dynamics, Romance, Rough sex, Sadism/Masochism, Dom/Sub, Mentions of addiction & self harm, Degradation, Praise kink, Exhibitionism, Orgasm denial, Breath play, Dirty talk.

Summary :

“Don’t you see what a dangerous game you’re playing? Why did you have to look so fucking delicious tonight, I couldn’t stop undressing you in my mind, thinking of all the twisted things I want to do to you.” She had only worked on the touring team for three weeks, but her mind had been hijacked by dirty thoughts of a man she barely even talked to. Sure, he was very attractive, but were there other reasons she was so uncontrollably drawn to him? This is a filthy story of pain, self discovery, and love.

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

Chapter 23: Sabotaged myself again

Chapter title is lyrics from "1x1"

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

“My girlfriend at the time killed herself, slashed her wrists one night.”

Oli’s words were flooding my head, filtering into my every thought and nearly drowning me, as I watched him perform from deep within the shadows.

Mat had requested that I’d stand further out so he could see me. I considered it when he asked, wanted to attempt it even, but the idea went flying straight out the window when Oli decided that mere seconds before going on stage was somehow the perfect time to dump a boatload of extremely heavy and bewildering information on me. 

So, instead I’d fallen back further into the corner than usual, to a spot where I could barely see the stage anymore, finding it hard to look at the man who was making my head spin out of control. Now he was only visible when he was in the very front – which was a lot more often than I remembered.

“I’ve dreamt about you for a month now, most nights you torture me, try to kill me.”

Why on earth did he choose now of all times to tell me things he had every opportunity to tell me last night? 

Or this morning if he hadn’t decided to mysteriously skip out on the rare opportunity to spend more alone time together – something that isn’t the easiest to come by when on tour.

And why is this his reaction when I tell him I’m spending time with Mat tonight, after how hard he’s been trying to convince me to do exactly that? I just couldn’t make sense of it all, and I was going insane trying.

“I don’t open up to people a lot, and I know you don’t either.”

As I watched him writhe on the stage floor, I noticed myself biting my nails – an anxious habit I’ve worked very hard to rid myself of. But the way he moved with such desperation and passion, the way his features would periodically melt in similar ways to when he was buried deep inside me would always drive me wild with filthy thoughts, long before I knew him intimately.

Not to mention his aggressive commands for the crowd, doing nothing but eliciting images from the sexual aggression he so exquisitely aimed at me during our time together. 

My knees felt weak, wanting him more than ever, made even worse by the ocean of anxiety I was swimming in – the anxiety that had me feel tenser than an overtightened guitar string, ready to snap.

I ripped my fingers out of my mouth for a second time, catching myself once again with my nails between my teeth.

He was just too good at shutting my brain up; too good of a distraction from all the turmoil inside me at any given moment. 

“You’re very special to me too.”

Which is very ironic, cause he appeared to be equally good at forcing me to face all those things I wanted to run from.

My mouth fell open in desire as I watched sweat run down his temple.

I felt powerless, needing him to just throw me over his shoulder again as soon as he stepped off the stage – to fuck me senseless in some random cleaning closet.

But at the same time I wanted so badly to just talk to him, find out what the hell was going on; find out if he was okay, feeling incredibly worried about him.

Wanting to show him that he was more than just my painkiller; more than just sex.

After the last song finished up I watched the lights die down, expecting him to come running down the stage steps any moment now.

Shaking myself, I took several deep breaths in order to brace myself to confront him, feeling determined to get to the bottom of this – despite my soaked underwear.

As soon as I saw him I started moving. He appeared to be looking around as well while I all-too confidently made a beeline for him.

Was he looking for me too?

He must have been, as the moment he spotted me he started taking long strides in my direction, appearing as determined as I felt.

Finally I could ask him the million questions I so desperately needed answered, voice all my concerns, and break free from this horrible, anxiety-induced, pressure chamber I was locked up in.

But when we came face to face we both just stared at each other.

Like a gasping fish, my mouth opened and shut repeatedly as I struggled to find the right words. And he seemed to be in the same predicament as he silently mirrored me. 

My frustration kept building, and building, until he suddenly mumbled, “I’m gonna go shower.”

Dumbfounded, I simply breathed, “Okay,” before he pushed past me and disappeared, leaving me to stew further in my angst.

Leaving me to wish he’d taken me with him, as the shower sounds like an excellent place to throw me up against the wall.

I wanted to collapse to the floor, to cry out of frustration, to rip my hair out from disappointment over not having voiced any of my thoughts when I finally got the chance.

Instead I just walked back to lean against the wall I’d been hugging all night, before Liam appeared.

“The lads won’t be too long, maybe half hour, then we can set off. You ready to go?” He was smiling from ear to ear with excitement, clearly ecstatic to get a night’s worth of fun.

The last thing I wanted to do was drag him down with my dreadful mood, so I did my best to swallow it and pretend everything was alright.

“Yeah, I got ready before the show.” I sounded cheerful as I pushed myself off the wall. 

Which, thankfully, had been convincing enough to keep the joyous spark in his eye, “Perfect, let's bring the van to the back exit.”

Time moved painfully slow as we waited in the van, while I fought myself to not freak out about the evening. Specifically about not knowing how to approach Oli, or knowing how he will handle watching me sit with Mat. Dread filled me at every thought. I tried so hard to ignore them but they were relentlessly, mercilessly torturing me.

But once I saw them exit the venue my attention was thankfully ripped away from my spiralling mental state and scattered thoughts.

They were both laughing, dressed in all black and looking handsome as ever as they walked towards the van. For a moment Oli threw his arm around Mat – such a cheerful and happy gesture. The perfect image of two friends who were about to hit the town and have a good time, with the same energy between them that I’d observed continuously the past month, seemingly completely untouched by last night, when Mat watched Oli carry me to his room.

Or this morning, when Oli saw how much Mat had turned me on in the elevator.

How could they seem so perfectly normal – so perfectly okay – considering everything that was going on? 

Meanwhile I was tearing myself apart inside, fighting tooth and nail to not have a breakdown.

When they stepped into the van my eyes met Oli’s in the rearview mirror as he shuffled into one of the seats. 

He looked relaxed, happy even.

Which was confusing.

The door slammed shut and the scent of alcohol filling the air quickly followed; they had already started drinking, which could possibly explain the sudden light mood.

None of which made me feel any better about the night to come.

The drive was short, and we were immediately ushered to the VIP section with the rest of the opening bands once we got there. 

The club was made up of two floors; the first of which was quite open, absolutely packed with people dancing, and mingling in the bar area.

The second floor looked out over the large gathering of people downstairs, and seemed to be exclusively VIP seating. While also quite crowded, it was much smaller, with more intimate seating arrangements consisting of clusters of sofas in different designs, split up by random intricate sculptures and artwork. 

With such a random assortment of interior designs gathered in one place, it threatened to make it feel messy. Yet the coloured lightning which painted everything in hues of blues and purples, made the choices seem oddly cohesive, almost charming, in an over the top, borderline tacky way.

As everyone filtered into the VIP section, passing the railing looking out over the first floor, I decided to fall back a bit to see what the others would do. 

Mat immediately fell back with me, offering his arm for me to take as we walked.

I felt a blush creep in as I took it against my better judgement, watching Oli ahead of us.

“You want a drink, love?” He said close to my ear so I’d hear him over the loud music and chatter all around us.

“I’m driving tonight, so no drinks for me I’m afraid.”

“Ah, I’ll try to not make a complete fool of myself then.”

The smile he gave me was seductive, confident, all of which made me feel like I was walking into a lion's den as I watched Oli take a seat on a plush sofa against the wall, next to some of the opening band members. His gaze was transfixed on me as Mat led us to a crushed velvet loveseat a couple of tables over, but still in Oli’s line of sight.

I wondered if Mat did this intentionally, to ‘get back’ at Oli for last night. And considering how competitive they’d been with each other on the bus yesterday, I wouldn’t be surprised.

An arm appeared behind me on the backrest as Mat got comfortable. He leaned in close again to talk, and I watched as Oli squirmed in his seat as Mat’s lips hovered next to my ear.

“I wanted to apologise for being so.. rushed in the elevator earlier. We just didn’t have a lot of time and, well, I really wanted to kiss you.”

A shiver ran up my spine, and I couldn’t tell if it was from his proximity, his breath tickling my ear, or because of what he said – or more importantly, how he’d said it.

Especially since we both knew he wanted to do a lot more than just kiss me this morning.

His soft smile was laced with a hunger that did nothing but confirm my thoughts.

My eyes darted to Oli again before I responded, and to my surprise he wasn’t paying us any mind. Instead he’d leaned forward, staring intensely at his phone.

Trying my best to not let Oli distract me, I returned my focus to the man next to me, “While I appreciate it, there really is nothing to apologise for.”

Dipping his head, his smile turned more bashful.

Part of me wanted to tell him that I’d hoped he’d kiss me, that I also had wanted it to happen, but instead I settled for my own apology, “Sorry for not standing further out during the show.”

He shook his head, “No I shouldn’t have asked, I know you prefer to keep to the corners. I just wanted to see you some more – you’re stunning, and not just tonight. You drive me half mad most days.”

My cheeks immediately heated up further. 

While the energy bouncing between us ever since I walked in on him mid-orgasm had continuously been quite charged, something clearly shifted after last night. It was like he’d turned the dial on the sexual tension to max.

Again I wondered if it was for competitive reasons, and even more unease filled me.

I couldn’t help it, my vision wandered back to Oli for a moment, who was still completely enthralled by the phone in his hands.

“Did you need to go talk to him?” Mat asked out of nowhere.

He must have noticed my treacherous eyes continuously looking at his friend.

“No, not yet.”

He took a long look at me, at my hands playing nervously with the hem of my skirt in my lap.

“Do you want us to move, love?” It didn’t take more than two seconds of him observing my facial expressions shift from his question, before he stood up and offered me his hand, “C’mon, let’s find somewhere else to sit, yeah?”

I hadn’t noticed how tense I’d been until Oli was no longer visible, causing me to just about melt into the booth he’d lead us to, with a view of a floor to ceiling water feature, seemingly made entirely of out glass, distorting everything behind it.

Once we got comfortable I noticed how he had left a bit of space between us, and how his arm was no longer draped behind me.

“The very last thing I want is to make you uncomfortable, Alice.”

I don’t know if it was the frustration from everything that was going on with Oli, or from not understanding Mat’s intentions with me, but I found myself annoyed at his statement.

“Can I ask you something?” I asked, trying to keep the frustration out of my voice. 

But I had clearly failed, as there was a small but noticeable shift in his body, revealing tension in him as well, “Of course, ask away.”

“Yesterday on our date, you were very adamant about just enjoying our time together, letting things develop naturally. But after last night it feels like you’re just trying to out-do Oli, to compete for me like some prize. Am I wrong?”

Mat’s face shifted, a seriousness taking hold of it that spread into his posture as he leaned in closer, his arm suddenly appearing behind me again, “You’re wrong.”

I felt myself growing increasingly confused as he took a short pause to consider his words. When he finally spoke the seductiveness was back, mingling with the seriousness, “There’s something I’ve been a bit worried about when it comes to our compatibility,” his gaze turned hungrier while he took another short pause, the tension inside me building as I still didn’t know where this was going, “let’s put it like this; I’ve never once before wished I was Oli. But last night when he spanked you, I really wished I was him.”

Lust exploded in me, the implications of his statement taking me by complete surprise.

Does he want to hurt me too?

I shut my mouth, noticing how my lips had parted, how my breathing had sped up.

His large, rough hand appeared on my bare thigh, the simple touch sending sparks flying throughout my whole body, highlighting how desperate I felt, reminding me that I’d been edged and denied my climax last night.

“Do you like it a bit rough, love?” His words came smooth like butter.

I felt torn between throwing myself at him and running away in sheer panic.

Could Mat offer me the same relief only Oli had been able to?

Feeling stunned, overwhelmed and flustered, I simply nodded my response to him, not sure how to articulate that I very much enjoy the rougher side of sex.

“I’d hoped as much, because I’m not sure I can do without it.”

The brain scrambling touch disappeared from my thigh, leaving it cold, jarring me back to reality.

“It’s not that I’m trying to win you, or compete with him. I’m just… eager, after having learned something about you that made me want you infinitely more.” He shifted in his seat, “I can tone it down though. Would you like that?”

I didn’t want that, I wanted his hand back on my thigh immediately. Preferably to travel higher.

Like a car colliding with a concrete wall at 100mph, my lust riddled thoughts came to a crashing halt as a sobering realisation hit.

The knowledge that Mat might be able to scratch the same itch as Oli, had acted like the missing link in the chain of my torturous scattered thoughts, and suddenly something quite disturbing became crystal clear.

You see, Mat was incredibly tempting to me. Not because of how charming, comforting or understanding he was; not because of all the sexual delights he was offering me on a silver platter – no, Oli could offer me all those same things. That's not what made Mat so very intriguing, not what set him apart.

In fact, the reason I wanted to throw myself at the man in front of me so badly didn’t have anything to do with his wonderful qualities. It had to do with the one thing Oli couldn’t offer me; 

I don’t have feelings for Mat.

I look at Mat and I don’t see commitment. I don't see the fear of attachment, or the hardship of having to face my inner demons.

Instead I see a way to sabotage a potential relationship with Oli.

Bile pushed up my throat as all the awful puzzle pieces fell into place.

Mat, who had been waiting for me to respond suddenly grew worried, “Alice, are you alright? You’re looking rather pale.”

I wasn’t surprised I looked pale, I felt as if I was about to pass out.

“I need to go.” I heard myself say distantly as I attempted to stand up, but Mat’s hand on my arm stopped me.

“Wait, Alice, what’s wrong? Did I do something to upset you?”

I couldn’t tell if he was worried or sad anymore, maybe both.

“N-no, I’m sorry. You haven’t done anything w-wrong at all.” My words sounded so far away, and I wondered if I actually was about to faint.

He kept his hand on my arm as he watched me, contemplating, “I want to let you go but we’re in a strange city, and you don’t seem alright. Please, just sit with me till you feel better.”

He removed his hand from me in order to stop a passing waiter, “Can we get some water, please?”

The drink came almost immediately, and I assumed that’s one of the perks of being in the VIP section. 

We sat in silence for a while as I sipped my water, slowly returning to myself.

Slowly realising exactly what I need to do next.

“You feeling any better?” The look he gave me was so thoughtful, so sweet, making me feel like a truly horrible person.

“Yes, a fair bit actually, thank you.”

He gave me a warm smile, “Do you still want to go? Cause it’s completely fine if you do.”

I looked at him, finding it incredibly hard to say what I needed to say, “Mat…”

But apparently it was all over my face already, “You’re turning me down, aren’t you?”

I was. It was the only right thing to do, for everyone involved.

“I’m so sorry.”

The sadness in his eyes said everything the smile that appeared on his lips couldn’t, “Hey, don’t worry about it. I’ll be fine, I promise.”

My head dipped out of shame.

“Was I too forward? Sorry for asking, I guess I’m just a bit confused.” He scratched his head, a nervous gesture that gave him a nearly boyish quality for a moment.

“N-no, you’ve been amazing actually…” I felt even worse as I was about to reveal the reason for my rejection, especially right on the heels of having accused him of being competitive, “It’s Oli.”

“Ah,” understanding caused his features to relax, softening into a more sincere looking smile, “Did you catch some feelings by any chance?”

“Maybe.” I admitted.

My apologetic eyes held his sombre ones for a moment before he spoke.

“Go talk to him.”

I opened my mouth, attempting to find the words to both thank him for being so incredibly kind to me around every turn, and at the same time just wanting to repeatedly apologise for everything – for leading him on, for getting his hopes up.

But he didn’t let me get a word out.

“I’ll be fine, really. You don’t have to worry.”

It sank in that there was nothing I could say that wouldn’t just make the situation worse, so I simply took a deep breath and pushed myself out of my seat.

“Hey Alice,”

Pausing, I looked down to see intense eyes staring up at me.

“I still don’t want things to be awkward between us.”

“Me neither.” I told him with a smile, before disappearing to find Oli.

... Subscribe to the story on Ao3 for future updates

[dameronscopilot]

Hello, lovely x

I know that you know I'm typing this right now, and I do apologize for hijacking your brain for the evening.

But I absolutely need you to give us your thoughts on Santi with a sensory deprivation kink and ice.

Be it headcanons, a drabble...anything you desire.

Please and thank you x

(You love taking advantage of my incredibly susceptible horny little brain cell—and I love you dearly for it.)

Shiver

Santiago "Pope" Garcia x f!reader

Word Count: 800+

Rating: EXPLICIT 18+

Content: NSFW, smut, sensory deprivation (blindfold), temperature play (ice), fingering, oral sex, squirting, anal teasing

"Trust me." Santiago's voice is warm and soothing as his breath ghosts the shell of your ear while he ties the blindfold snugly at the back of your head.

Splayed out naked atop the silk sheets of your bed, you blink against the inky black darkness of the cloth obscuring your vision, and you strain your ears in an attempt to follow the sound of his fading footsteps. When he returns, the right side of the bed dips slightly under his weight, and you turn your head in his direction expectantly.

"So, are you going to tell me what your secret plan is yet?" you ask.

He's been incredibly vague about the whole thing since this morning—the only thing he said was that he wanted to make you feel good tonight.

Santi doesn't answer you, and the room is oddly silent for a few moments. Overcome with impatience, you reach up with intentions of taking a quick look out from under the blindfold, but you gasp instead as you feel a cold sensation pressed against your inner thigh.

"Santi!" you shudder as the feeling drags upward, leaving a freezing cold trail in its wake.

At the feeling of teeth nipping at your skin, you realize that's his mouth.

Oh.

Santiago clocks the exact second that you surmise what exactly he's doing, and you can feel him smirk against your leg as you relax your head heavily back down against the pillow.

His lips make their way over your hip bone, across your bellybutton, and then he pulls away. You hear a sucking noise, followed by a clink—he must have ice in a glass.

Though you've caught on to what he's doing, you still aren't expecting the sensation of his freezing cold mouth latching onto your breasts. Clasping the sheets beneath you like your life depends on it, your toes begin to curl as he sucks at your peaked nipples.

He kisses his way across your collarbone to your neck, igniting goosebumps across your flesh as his cold lips suck at the tender spot just below your earlobe. His lips are wet and slick when he slots them against yours, licking away all of the warmth inside of your mouth and replacing it with a frosted edge.

Suddenly, there's a cold, biting feeling sliding across your breasts. Santi twirls the ice cube in his fingers, circling your achingly hard nipples with it. It's a delicious sting, and you whine into Santiago's mouth as you arch your back up off of the bed in response.

"Do you want more?" he asks against your lips, trailing the ice cube down your stomach.

"Please," you pant out.

Leaving you with a chaste kiss, Santi slides down the bed, and a jolt of excitement shoots through you when he spreads your legs and settles down between your thighs.

"Tell me if it's too much."

You nod.

But nothing could have prepared you for the feeling of his frigid mouth pressing a kiss to your mound. A shiver shoots down your spine, and Santi's hands curl around your hips as he begins to gently mouth at your folds.

"More," you whine.

You can hear the amused rumble in Santi's chest as he reaches down to press a chilled finger to your slit, running it through the slick pool of juices steadily dripping out of you.

"Are you sure you can take it?" he asks, and you can hear as he begins to suck on another piece of ice.

Dizzy with arousal, you buck your hips up toward him slightly as you plead, "Please, Santi."

Idly sliding an ice cube up the inside of your thigh, he murmurs, "Good girl."

Your mind turns to static once Santiago's freezing cold tongue begins lapping at your cunt, and a strangled noise punches out of you when he slips it into your entrance. As he licks his way inside of your tight channel, it's all you can do not to start outright crying in pleasure at the borderline painful feeling of his frigid mouth exploring the depths of your hot core.

"Feels so fucking good, Santi," you whimper, rolling your hips into his touch.

He pauses, seemingly to get another ice cube. And as badly as you wish you could see him right now, the sensations are only heightened with your vision shrouded in darkness.

When his mouth returns to your mound, his lips begin to suck at your swollen clit, and you tightly grasp his hair as you cry out. Meanwhile, he slips two ice cold fingers into your pussy, pumping them in and out of you.

"Can you come for me, baby?" Santi asks as his tongue swirls around your clit.

And when he slides his other hand beneath you to probe at the entrance to your other tight, puckered hole with an ice cube, you do. Your whole body trembles in pleasure as your climax rocks through you, and a gush of fluid floods out of your cunt, squirting all over Santiago's hand and face.

"Fuck, that was hot," he groans, and you can hear the sound of his palm scraping against the denim of his jeans as he roughly palms his throbbing erection.

"Cold, you mean," you say with a giggle, lifting up the corner of the blindfold.

—

Comments, reblogs, and/or asks are always appreciated!

» OSCAR ISAAC MASTERLIST » SANTIAGO GARCIA MASTERLIST

[hazzybat]

omg I loved the new chapter!! There is so much going on emotionally and sorry to hijack a lovely Jance/Kris & Jan friendship chapter with my silly little bokris agenda but my brain has chosen to latch on to a new mental image you might enjoy!! Of Kris as a bat just proudly riding around on Bojans shoulder nestled into his neck, or tucked into his shirt pocket right over his heartbeat, or hanging off his belt by his hips cuz ofc they're comfortable with him being so close to the intimate areas that basically belong to Kris anyway (although I'll admit I'm also excited to read about Jan taking some ownership over those places too) I lovedddd the possessive way Bojan wrapped his tail around krises leg in chapter 2 and I love the thought of them just always touching/being with eachother with that sense of ownership and togetherness even when Kris is a cute little bat . And omg they could go on moonlit flights together too 😭

Thank you!! I'm glad you liked it and yes I utterly love KrisBat.

I love these ideas! They're all very touchy feely thankfully so I can totally see these happening!

Kris hanging like a set of keys off Bojan's belt loop. "Okay I got my wallet, my keys, my smokes and my Kris!" As he gives Kris a little head pat with his finger

They're all really sweet ideas so thank you so much for sharing them with me!

[late-to-the-magnus-archives]

All my fic brain has been hijacked

The Magnus Archives AU. - Jon/Martin friends since teeny-tiny days - Professional Photographer Jon, jetting around the world and getting The Best Rarest Pics - Professional baker Martin, who survives off his YouTube channel - Featuring Vast!Jon and Lonely!Martin - Shenanigans - Two idiots who needs their heads thocked together - Angst - More Shenanigans - Angst and eventual happy ending but we are gonna have to EARN it, folks

Anyway, here's a snippet. Enjoy!

Er. "Enjoy" being relative. This would be where Jon is marked by the Vast.

I am so mean to my babies...

-----------------------

Jon never knew it could be so cold.

It’s so cold that he can’t feel the metal impaling his side, keeping him trapped.

So cold he can’t feel his fingers, his toes, his back against the snow, though he hears it crunching beneath him.

So cold his eyes feel like thin sheets of ice form over them between every blink.

It seems unfair that anything this cold could still hurt.

And it does. A deep ache through his whole body, probably caused by his circulatory system’s desperate attempt to constrict everything and keep him alive.

Pointless. What a stupid biological response.

I told you, Martin, he’d said one day, when Martin’s latest muffins had burned his hand and Jon had tenderly wrapped it. Our bodies are stupid. They didn’t evolve right. What’s the point of hands being so vulnerable to fire, anyway? They should be more heat resistant than anything else we grow!

Weird, the things that come to you when you’re dying.

Jon tries to move again, but at last, his body has stopped obeying him. He cannot even seem to breathe deeply anymore.

The jagged metal that pierced him - penetrated, bursting out the other side like some weird, red birth  - is still there, a weird and uncomfortable pressure, but at least it no longer hurts the way it first did.

Jon is trapped, staring at endless sky, like a bug pinned on its back.

A groan from somewhere behind him is no comfort. He doesn’t know how the rest of the team is - besides dying or dead - but he was the only one, after the crash, that called hello.

And help.

And Please, I don’t want to die.

The sky did not care.

Though now, it seems to listen.

Blood loss, he thinks, because it has to be, because the sky is atmospheric gasses and radiation and gravity, not a thing that can curve down toward you like a hand in a big blue mitten.

It’s terrifying, this hallucination.

He keeps staring, still.

He’d stared at the sky when the plane’s first engine went out, when they were still over Xi’an, and there was time to turn back.

He’d stared at the sky when the second engine went, somewhere over Chengdu, and the pilot’s rapid, angry Mandarin failed to get a response on the radio.

He’d stared when the third engine went, and everyone panicked, and - trying not to drown in sound of the people he��d lived with and loved for three years crying shouting and praying and pleading - pushed his mind and his gaze and his self out toward that perfect, thin horizon, instead of anticipating his horrible, flaming, crushing death.

He does not remember when the fourth failed. He’d stopped listening.

And when he saw the white, jagged mountain coming at the plane so fast, too fast, like a fist, all he could do was curl in a ball and close his eyes.

This’ll cost National Rage at least 6k, he thinks in a daze, tallying up the cameras, the hard drives, the lights, the mics, the various equipment his team had carried safely through four continents and twenty-eight countries.

What a weird thing to think.

Jon does not want to die.

“Martin,” he whispers, and tastes blood as his lips crack.

He wishes…

They should have kissed. He’s a moron.

My fault, he thinks, but has no strength to laugh.

His eyes will no longer close. All he can see is blue.

Gravity feels reversed. Like he’s falling up, somehow, away from the world, spinning without moving at all.

Maybe the sky will swallow him.

Maybe he’d like it to.

It seems… a peaceful way to be eaten.

Jon stares at the sky, and stops fighting to breathe.

[gingerale2017]

Morning Haze

Fluff without a plot Words: 2k Pairing: Cinder Linh x Kai Fandom: The Lunar Chronicles Setting: A couple years after Stars Above Warnings: None Ao3 Link <3

Cinder was having trouble keeping her eyes open. The more she read about the new regulations on Public Hover Transportation, the more her eyelids felt inclined to close and never open up again. But she read on and barely managed to understand the basic changes the company made. Each blink became tortuous enough that she threw her port across the bed and chose to read the article in her mind, eyes closed.

It wasn’t much better. She realized that it wasn’t her eyes protesting the absence of sleep, but it was her brain refusing to think.

‘This is important’ Torin had said when he sent a the article to her and Kai earlier, ‘PHT hasn’t changed their rules since it was made back when Kai’s grandfather ruled. They have made many changes unofficially since then but now they needed to make an official document on how they would behave toward those who don’t follow their protocal. Recent technology, I believe, is their stated cause. Along with security purposes.”

‘So it contains their responce to people who don’t use the Bio-Lock?” Kai asked, though he knew the answer.

“Yes, but it’s mostly focused on Lunars. They are worried about one of the unlocked Lunars manipulating and hijacking a public hover.”

Of course it’s about Lunars, Cinder remembered thinking. Ever since Garan’s invention came out into the world, every major company changed something about themselves. As Queen, she had to read each article since it regarded her subjects (and each one always gave her a headache).

She thought she’d seen the last of those papers when her reign ended but they keep popping up again. Most of them had already changed their rules when the Bio-Lock was first introduced, except for a few like PHT, but they were minor companies and she didn’t need to read them.

The articles she read before were all the same and easier to understand. But this article had her reading and re-reading each sentence so it made sense. It might be the lack of sleep and how this day would never end, but she just couldn’t read this paper.

“Are you awake, love?” Cinder's eyes flew open immediately.

Kai had been inspecting her face for who knows how long. His fingers lingered on her elbow and she wondered if she was tracing her arms. He had a habit of tracing her figure while she slept and sometimes she’d wake up to it (she usually enjoyed it).

He smiled, a question on his lips, and brought her port up to her face, “Might I ask why your port is on the ground?”

His hair was wet from his recent shower, smelling like soap. It was something about this state that she liked very much and--stars, how she loved it. He was so close to her face she could barely focus.

Cinder smiled back, “I didn’t mean to throw it that far.”

He leaned in closer very slowly. Everything is always slow with him. It both excited and irritated her. “Then why was it thrown?”

“I got tired of reading on a screen so I read in my mind.” Her voice got lower the closer he came, “But the writers of that paper are so repetitive and boring.”

Kai lowered the port on her lap and gradually dragged his fingers across her stomach to rest on her waist. His other hand moved up from her elbow, up her arm, shoulder, collarbone, cheek, then dropped parallel to his other hand. All the while he kept coming closer and closer until he was teasing her with his lips.

Cinder’s heart did circus acts in her chest. Her tiredness miraculously vanished and her eyes could only focus on his perfect, beautiful lips. Lips that have tasted hers more times than her cyborg brain could count. Lips that could sway crowds and speak sweet nothings in her ears. Lips that she has met with her own almost every day. Lips that she would rather drink sewage water than live without.

Kai crept on top of her, taking his time while pretending to not notice the way he was driving her crazy. Cinder wanted to grab and kiss him but she (miraculously) forced herself to be patient.

“What were you reading?” he murmured softly, heading towards her neck.

“You know. The PHT article.” She said, careful to not let her words tremble.

“What part?”

“Uh,” she summoned the article back, “Note 37.”

“Mmm,” Kai’s nose grazed her cheek, then jaw, “The part about Lunars?”

“All of them are about Lunars. But yes.”

She could feel his smile on her skin, “Would you mind reading it to me?”

She sighed, “Note 37: Lunar citizens who do not observe the laws on-,” he finally kissed her neck, “using new technology, specifically the” another kiss, “Bioelectricity Lock-” kiss, “will be asked” kiss, “to leave the public hover-” kiss, “and to not” kiss, “access public transportation-” kiss going upwards, “until they install-” kiss on her jaw, “the lock and show-” kiss on her cheek, “proven records” kiss on the corner of her lips, “of the necessary procedure.”

“Force will be used if someone refuses to leave the public hover, then the hover will trigger an alarm that will notify the nearest Police Station,” he added just as he reached her lips. Still smiling, he tried to pull away but Cinder grabbed his shirt and kissed him.

She kissed him hurriedly, unlike his careful, cautious touches. She was impatient and hasty, digging her fingers in his hair.

They kissed until Kai pulled away with a large grin on his face. Then, he rolled off of her but still held her waist, and dug his face in her neck. He didn’t do anything, just rested there while they caught their breath.

He pulled Cinder closer until she was facing him and pecked her cheek and went up to her lips then her temple. Just like magic, her drowsiness returned and she huddled closer, feeling safe and relaxed in his arms. Not too long after, she fell into a much needed sleep.

~

Kai watched his wife’s body rise and fall. Cinder slept peacefully and deeply. She usually woke up before him (probably due to her internal alarm) and never slept enough.

Recently, Kai had been making sure she had. He would drag himself to bed earlier than usual and drag Cinder along with him.

Proven just last night, this method works.

In the mornings, he would do anything possible to keep her from waking up. If she woke up, he would convince her to not get out of bed yet via whispers in her ear. That either relaxed her or tensed her. It was a 50/50 shot.

This morning, there was no need for whispers or hugs. She slept for such a long time that it was bordering on ‘oversleeping’.

Now, Kai had to wake her up before someone would come looking for them.

He started to stroke her hair, smoothing the fly-aways and curling strands on his finger. Cinder slept facing Kai, her lips upturned just a tiny bit as if she were having a good dream. He wished she was.

He loved her hair, he loved touching it, he loved combing it, he loved pulling it, he loved styling it, he loved everything about it. More he loved her skin, face, lips, eyes, hands, legs, feet, nose, etc. He loved everything about her.

Cinder began to wake, her face twitching slightly. She opened her beautiful brown eyes, covered in a morning haze. She smiled when she saw Kai staring at her. Her lips were touched by magic. She looked ethereal in this sun, absolutely wonderful. He couldn’t believe that she was his, forever tied together, even now after their marriage. Though, it didn’t feel like it would go away in an instant anymore. Now, they could their time loving each other,

“Good morning, my love.” He murmured, kissing her forehead.

Still smiling, she stretched her arms out and looped them around his neck, “Good morning.” She yawned and shut her eyes again.

Kai pulled her closer so her head could rest on his chest. She sighed deeply and stilled for so long that he began to wonder if she fell asleep again.

Instead, she spoke, “I slept a full six hours. My system is telling me to keep it up to be healthy,” he could feel her face scrunch up, “I can’t remember the last time I did that.”

“How was it?”

“Very nice.” Her fingers slowly traced the length of the back of his neck, occasionally curling around strands of his hair, “I dreamt.”

“Oh really?” he asked.

“Yes. About us,” she smiled then with her eyes still closed.

“A good dream I hope,” it was more of a question. Sometimes, more often at the start of their relationship, she would whimper and twitch in her sleep. Sometimes she woke up in sweat and sobs. It hurt Kai to see her get hurt even by her own mind. He would hold her and kiss and remind her that he was here. That he would take care of her and love her until he can no longer breathe. His deepest confessions of love for her were admitted while she was unconscious and hurting. He’s revealed many of them since their wedding though.

“Yes. A very good dream.” She whispered.

“About...?”

Cinder opened her eyes, “Spending our day together. But we weren’t rulers of a country. We were normal and maybe the only people in the world,” she paused, frowning, “I don’t remember anyone else.”

“What did we do?”

“Mmh, kiss, talk, eat, talk, kiss, kiss, and more kissing,” she leaned in as if she was going to kiss his neck. Stars, he hoped so, “I liked that part.”

“I’m sure you did. I’m a good kisser, even in your dreams,” he smirked.

“How would you know? You’re not in them.”

“Intuition, my love.”

She humphed, “You’re just cocky.”

“If I’m ‘just cocky’, then why do you like it so much?” If only she could blush.

Her fingers froze in his hair. She pulled slightly back so she could see him and made a failed attempt at an annoyed face. It was very endearing.

“Because you’re my husband. I don’t think we would be married if I didn’t like it.”

“So you married me for my kissing skills?”

She rolled her eyes, “Yes, Kai.”

“Wowwww Cinder, I didn’t know I married someone so superficial,” he teased.

“Pay more attention.”

“I didn't know you only liked my kisses!” he exaggerated as she slowly pulled him closer, hands still in his hair.

“Among other things,” Cinder muttered while slightly biting her lip. He couldn’t help but stare at the nibble wanting to do that himself. This habit of hers was something he loved since the very day he met her. More often than not she didn’t realize she was doing it but when she did notice she would use it to tease him. And it drove him crazy every single time.

He wondered if she was doing it on purpose right now, in fact.

He pondered just grabbing her and kissing her or playing the waiting game. Meanwhile, her fingers, her beautiful miracle-working fingers, provoked something inside him. The need to kiss her (anywhere, everywhere) grew with the twist or pull of his hair, and when they swirled around his bare neck.

He stared at her as she reached his chest and then up his shirt. She leaned towards him, her hand in his hair tightening and digging itself deeper. Her mouth touched his neck.

Cinder kissed him gently, while he held her waist and brought her as close as he possibly could. He sighed pleasantly.

This was one of Kai’s favorite parts of married life. Waking up holding her every morning, kissing her temple, watching her sleep (if he was lucky enough to wake up before her). He loved it. It was peaceful and relaxing. Full of admiration and coziness. He felt like they were regular people here, waking up in the same bed as regular couples do. Like her dream. He never thought of meetings or the upcoming events of that day in these moments. Only Cinder. But she was the one who always brought it up.

As if on cue, she pulled away from him, her brow furrowed.

“What’s up?” he asked in a lazy tone.

She sighed, “Ugh. We have a meeting on the PHT article today and I can’t remember anything.” Sadly, she pulled her hand away from his chest. What a drag. He liked the feeling.

“Neither can I. But it seems you have the advantage, my love.” He twirled a lock of her hair, “Unlike our unremarkable brains that have to memorize, you get to pull it up on will.”

Cinder rolled her eyes, “Stop complaining."

"What? I was simply noting how awesome my wife's brain is."

"You're so corny." She pushed him off of her and rolled off the bed.

"Yes, but you secretly love it." He sat up, "Admit it."

She walked over to the foot of the bed, "It wouldn't be much of a secret if I did." Then she disappeared inside their giant bathroom to get ready for the day.

Kai plumped back down with a large smile on his face. Good stars, how did he end up here, with her? How did he land someone so perfect? Yes, they had their arguments. Yes, they annoyed each other sometimes. But their relationship felt like a gift from the universe itself. In a different reality, he would have been married to Levana, or some other girl from a good family without even ever meeting Cinder. He could have died without ever knowing her. But he did meet her at the stall that day and he did fall in love with her. She fell in love back. The situation was and is perfect.

As the morning haze painted his features, he contemplated his life and future with Cinder. He was excited about more mornings and late afternoons with her. To convince her to go to sleep and to wake her up. To kiss her every day to their heart's content. They had time, plenty of time, and he planned to not waste any of it.

If only this morning haze lasted forever.

A/N: I'm backkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk (no promises)

Tagging: @just2bubbly @cinderswrench @cindersassasin @greenalmond @the-wee-woo-royal @deprivedmusicaljunkie @crescentchat @notjacinclay @wheresmymom-imlost @salt-warrior @rapunzelfromthemoon @briggycat @impossiblesuitcase @kaider-is-my-otp (these are for my kaider ONLY fics so please ask if you want to be tagged or removed <;3)

[selene-and-the-cold]

OF/MD Drabble - Darkness

So, I was writing a fic for OF/MD, when all of a sudden, intrusive thoughts of angsty!Ed hijacked my brain.

There is sick!Ed (no snz, but coughing and fever) and a worried Stede. It is really just a tiny snipped of angst, but it wanted out so here it is :D

Somewhere past re-union, but please be gentle if anything here is not in accordance with S2 because I haven't seen it, yet, and only live on spoilers ^^

It's very vague, so could be at any point after their reunion.

***

The darkness was everywhere.

So heavy that Edward's eyes hurt from its pressure. An all-encompassing, deep, thick black leaden fog. Engulfing him. Choking him. Its pressure spread from his eyes to his head, and chest, invisible hands closing around his neck. He tried to get up, but the darkness sat so heavy on his chest that he could not move. His limbs were weighed down by the leaden darkness and he could not breathe. Could not move. His heart was racing, thumping hard against his rib-cage, urging him to fight, and rid himself of the darkness' crushing weight. He tried to scream – perhaps some of the guys would hear him, someone, anyone!

But as soon as he opened his mouth, the darkness streamed into it like thick black smoke, coiling into his mouth and throat like an angry black snake. He writhed restlessly, trying to push the weight off him with all his might, mouth agape in a silent, choked scream no one would hear.

I'm gonna die here, Ed suddenly thought. I'm gonna fucking die and no one will know. No one was here. No one cared. He was alone. And Stede was gone.

Ed tried to call out for help again. Tried to call out for Stede, but the weight on his chest became so heavy that Ed had to cough, his body shaking violently, beads of sweat dripping down his face, as he writhed, twisted, tossed and turned, fighting the darkness with all his might.

He coughed again, his lungs burning like someone had stabbed his lungs with a thousand tiny knives, each wound bleeding and hurting with every cough. By now, he had no idea if he was standing up, or lying down, floating or falling, Everything hurt, and it was so fucking hot in here... Too hot. Too dark. Too much.

And yet, he was painfully aware that something was missing... Something was not there. Someone... Stede! Stede was not here.

Stede...

Some time ago, he'd dreamed about Stede coming back. Of soft, blond waves of hair next to him on the pillow, close enough for him to touch and rake his fingers through. Of Stede's warm body next to his. Of tender kisses and of falling asleep in his arms, head resting against Stede's chest.

“Stede...”

Dry, cracked lips, barely moving, breathing Stede's name out into the stillness of the night between rattling coughs.

Stede had just gone out to the bathroom for a few moments, but Ed's harsh, labored coughs had called him back with urgency.

“Ed! I'm here. I'm here, love!”

Stede hurried over, his dressing gown fluttering behind him. Hand outstretched, he reached the bed and clasped Edward's hand, while he tried to pull him up with the other.

“Ed, please, try to sit up for me so you can breathe.”

Suddenly, Ed's eyes were wide open, staring at Stede with anxious fury, so painfully intense that his fear burnt through the darkness of their quarters.

“Stede..?,” Edward asked, a quiet sob that rang through Stede's very core. “You... You're here? I though you were a dream... I thought you wouldn't come back...,” Ed choked out between coughs, damp hair plastered to his feverish brow, brown eyes swimming with tears.

“Yes, Edward, I'm here..” Stede clasped Ed's hand a little tighter, greedily gathering Edward's in his grasp. “I'm sorry, I just went to the bathroom for a moment.”

Stede's chest ached with the all too familiar feeling of losing the one person he wanted to spend his life with. The one person who made life worthwhile. That very ache was staring back at him out of Edward's eyes. Seeing it there, knowing that he had put it there, was agony.

Stede helped Edward sit up, who was still wrecked with harsh coughs, his entire body trembling from the effort of choking out those coughs because he was so weak from fever.

Unable to do very much else, Stede just held him and rubbed his back in soothing circles, steadying his beloved, while the savage coughing fit ran its course. It was one of the worst yet, and Stede prayed to all the deities who cared to listen that they would soon arrive at Barataria Bay, where – at least according to Jim – a former nun with special healing powers had found shelter and a new home after being expelled from her convent.

As the heavy darkness slowly let off and gave Edward's lungs free, the coughing began to subside. Stede gently tightened his arms around Ed, as if he could absorb him into his body if he'd only tried hard enough.

“There we go... you'll soon be able to breathe better, Ed. Just let it out... take it slow.. one breath after the other.”

He rocked their bodies in a gentle, soothing motion, kissing Ed's hair, and damp forehead, doing anything he could, really, to show Ed that he was here.

“Stede... I thought you were gone?,” Edward sobbed, “I... I was drowning, choking, and you weren't there...”

“I know...” the knowledge of it would forever haunt Stede. He had been too afraid to stay. Too afraid to disappoint, blind enough not to notice that leaving was the biggest disappointment he could ever have put Ed through. The worst possible mistake.

“But now I'm here and I will never leave you again, Edward. I'm sorry... This time, me leaving was just a bad dream. And it will always be never more than a bad dream because I will never leave again – unless you tell me to.”

Edward violently shook his head and buried his face so deep into Stede's chest, that Stede could feel hot tears soaking through the fabric of his nightshirt.

The two men held each other for a long moment, soaking in each other's presence, until Stede could feel Edward become heavy in his arms, as Ed's meager well of strength ran dry.

“You should lie back down and rest, my love. Here.. we'll prop you up against these pillows so you can breathe a bit more easily.”

Edward still clawed at Stede's dressing gown, unwilling to let go.

“What about you?,” Ed rasped, but the intensity, which was lacking in his voice lingered in his gaze. Glassy eyes searching Stede's, their deep, dark color gleaming with the fear of being alone.

“I'll be here. Right beside you.”

[thyandrawrites]

For the shipping bingo board, Rin/Isagi, Kunigami/Chigiri & Nagi/Reo :3

Woo, a fun one!

Rinsagi:

Listen. They are The ship because they are divorced and soulmates at the same time. I love that energy they have going on. Their dynamic got sidetracked with the neo egoist arc and kaiser's introduction as isagi's new foil/rival, but imho bllk peaked when these two were still navigating how to coexist with each other and simultaneously come on top of each other. What I like about their dynamic is that is balanced. While isagi makes an effort to understand rin and work with him instead of for him like everyone else, isagi also doesn't coddle him or tries to fix him.

They are equally deranged for football and their skill levels are different, but on the field they push and challenge each other in ways that other dynamics simply don't, imho. I never get the feeling from them that either one has fully caught up to the other, and that's part of why I like them so much. They barely tolerate each other, yet they're the closest thing to actual teamwork this manga will ever have. What I love about them is that despite being polar opposite in basically every respect (personalities, family curcumstances, attitude towards others), they're also very in-synch because on the field they see the same view and think the same way. Everyone always says that kaisagi is the dbhwks equivalent of bllk, but to me that's rinsagi. Enemies that have way too much in common and don't want to admit it.

Plus I find it funny that they're both lowkey-highkey touch averse so that makes imagining them as a couple fairly fun :')

Kunigiri:

This is where I'm conflicted because this is a very very small fandom, and the bloggers who actively talk here (here being tumblr or discord) as opposed to just... Sharing things are almost all kncg shippers. For the sake of finding fandom friends, I tried liking this ship. Believe me, I did! But it just isn't hitting for me. And the thing is, I can see the appeal. They have the same tragic angle of friends separed that nagireo and bachisagi do, except it's even more tragic because one of them is almost eliminated! Plus the whole "came back wrong" potential angle! I should be shipping them! I live for angst and for hurt/comfort! But I just... I don't know. I find them a bit bland, and it doesn't help that I hate with a passion the nickname "princess" and you just cannot avoid it in this corner of the fandom

I guess I will try harder, maybe eventually I will find out the fic that will convert me

Nagireo:

This is where I reveal myself as unhinged because they have completely hijacked my brain. I STARTED SHIPPING THEM AS A JOKE. because it was funny. And then I read episode nagi. And then somehow they became my biggest comfort ship ever??? They can barely communicate. They actively make each other worse (at least as far as blue lock themes go. They'd be fine in a different manga). How did this happen.

Ahem. Without writing (another) essay on them (check my meta tag for those), I will say that I am absolutely feral about these two. They're fun because they are so Weird. They're the best friends to lovers trope but they can't talk to each other at all. Miscommunication is their daily bread. They're rivals who can't help being wrapped around each other's fingers. One moment they're trying to progress as their own individuals, the next they're back to being codependent. They exemplify so many of the themes of blue lock and one day I'm gonna write a whole essay on it. Like I'm not even kidding, reonagi, bachisagi and rinsae are all faces of the same coin. I'm convinced Kaneshiro introduced them all to drive home the idea that the best striker in the world cannot live for someone else's success, and those three dynamics are different stages of self awareness in that respect. In that respect I think all three are integral to the series and that's why they're the most nuanced dynamics of the show

But as for nagireo itself? I know they will make me miserable eventually because I want them to be a team and that will never happen (well, if you don't take into account how they're both likely to make it to the u20 proper at least). But still. If I didn't like pain I wouldn't be shipping them in the first place I guess

[hazbin-college]

Rosie and Alastor lunch date!

Alastor usually ate lunch by himself, often taking the free time to decompress from all the time he had to spend around classmates. Full time classes plus the extra volunteer hours he needed meant way too much time around moving bodies.

But today Rosie had asked him to eat with her. And how could he say no to his favorite classmate. So they were sat together in the cafeteria, chatting quietly in the mostly empty space. The lunch rush had ended a bit ago and most people were either studying or off somewhere more interesting. It was a good time to be in the usually too loud space.

He set his fork down and excused himself from the conversation for a moment to go to the bathroom, Rosie giggling at his formality, he was always a bit too formal in public. The actions part of his ever kept up school persona. It wouldn’t do him any good if he let it slip in such a public setting.

He checked his appearance in the bathroom mirror, fixing his hair a bit back into place before leaving to go back to his table.

However when he got back into view he paused, eyebrows furrowing a bit at the picture in front of him. Some guy was leaning over the table he had just been at, talking at Rosie with a smug look.

The vibe this dude was giving off made his nose wrinkle, he could spot an ass from a mile away. Rosie of course was humoring him just enough to not be rude, ever the picture perfect host she was. He could easily catch her tells though, she was beyond uncomfortable with this guy presumably hitting on her.

Her eyes glanced over and caught sight of Alastor, her smile straining a bit to show her discomfort to him. Her fingers tucked neatly onto her lap twitched a little, a small movement indicating she wanted him to come over to her.

So of course he did, plastering on his best relaxed smile and sauntering back over to the table that had been hijacked

“Alastor! What a surprise to see you here!” Rosie suddenly spoke, standing up from her spot, nudging past the dude heckling her. She slipped easily into the spot next to him, and looped her elbow in place around his, giving his arm a little squeeze. Asking for him to play along “I was just talking to this lovely gentleman, he was inviting me out to dinner tonight. I do believe we already have plans though, dear. Don’t we?” She prompted, leaning over to press a kiss to his cheek.

Alastor’s brain short circuited for all of two seconds. His composure only momentarily lost, before easily putting his front back up and smiling fondly at his friend. Easily keeping the cringe inside his body he had at the kiss “of course! I believe we’re going to see a movie. And then dinner after that? Sorry, but she’ll have to decline your offer” he spoke, directing the last sentence to the intruder in front of them

He didn’t look that intimidating next to Rosie, as they were nearly the same height. However the guy in front of him was a good few inches shorter, and he easily used that to his advantage. Tilting his chin up just slightly so he had to look down at the pest a little more. His schooled expression giving a slightly wider smile, enough to be unsettling. And it did its job, the guy looking visibly uncomfortable

“This your boyfriend or somthin’?” He asked rather rudely, gesturing a sloppily pointed finger towards Alastor.

“He is indeed! It just slipped my mind not to mention him in our previous conversations. You know how it is when you’ve been with someone a long time, occasionally you just forget other’s don’t know!” Her voice remained polite and patient throughout her words, as it usually did. But she was tense against him. He could assume this man has been a consistent problem if its got her out of sorts. So who was he to not play along.

“I think we should probably be off now anyway. We don’t want to forget to grab a snack and a drink for our movie” Alastor had spoken before the guy in front of him had the chance “pleasure to meet you! Maybe I’ll see you again and we can chat longer” he hummed, turning to place his own small kiss onto Rosie’s cheek. Before gently tugging her along to head towards the exit. He didn’t want to keep up this charade any longer than he had to. However the annoyed grumbling behind him did amuse him a little.

Once they were far enough from the building to not chance the same guy seeing them again Rosie pulled her arm from Alastor’s grip, and let out a long sigh “I apologize. He has been a thorn in my side too many times now, and doesn’t seem to know how to take a no unless I’m already claimed by someone” she said, emphasizing her annoyance with an eye roll “really, how hard is it to understand I don’t want to go on a date simply because you aren’t my type” she huffed, before shifting her attention back to her friend, and smiling, clasping her hands together “you did lovely though! And I appreciate you playing along”

Alastor simply gave a shrug “if it gets him off your back I don’t mind. I don’t plan on making a habit out of it though” he said, scrunching his nose a bit. He didn’t like public affection at all, he didn’t want to be touching anyone ever with a public audience “how about next time he bothers you I knock a few of his teeth out” he grinned. Anyone else would have taken that as a fake offer. But Rosie knew better, he absolutely would.

She shook her head with a little exasperated laugh “no, you know I don’t like you fighting. I’m sure I can handle it the next time he comes around again. Hopefully that little show will keep his sights off me for a bit” she smiled, nudging Alastor with her elbow “could I persuade you into turning that movie date idea into something real? I’ve been dying to go to the theater again” her tone was a tad teasing, but in the loving way he knew.

He gave a contemplative hum, tapping his chin with a finger “I suppose I’d be okay with seeing something, but you have to pay” he shot back. And Rosie gave a little laugh, nodding. That was him bluffing, she knew he was far too much of a gentleman to ever make her pay. She would of course if given the option. But he liked to buy her things. One of the few ways he could expression his appreciation for her.

So they were off together to buy snacks and catch a movie. The previous altercation all but forgotten now.

[ablogcalledrevenge]

A Stranger Things Hanukkah Special!

A/N: Happy Hanukkah to all my fellow Jews out there! I’ve been reading so many sweet and lovely Steddie Christmas fics that I felt like contributing myself. I personally headcanon the Byers and Eddie as Jewish, so I wanted to write something festive of my own. I’ll be completely transparent and admit I didn’t actually watch season 4, just got the synopsis from multiple people, but just like OFMD, the Steddie brainrot is real. I hope you like it and may your holidays be full of warmth and love!

Eddie arrived around noon at Steve’s house just before he was about to jump in the shower. He came in holding a bag of onions in one hand and a small sack of potatoes in the other. He also had a backpack that looks full to bursting.

“Good afternoon Mr Harrington. I’ve come to hijack your Christmas party.” Eddie announced, bowing low on Steve’s doorstep. Rolling his eyes fondly, Steve let him in from the cold.

“You’re hijacking my Christmas party?” He deadpanned, watching Eddie unload his things and wash his hands at the sink in the kitchen. There were plain sugar cookies cooling on the counter; Steve was going to let all the kids decorate them during the party.

“Well, I was talking to Jonathan, you know Jonnyboy right Stevie? Anyway, we were talking and he mentioned how much El loves Christmas because it’s still really brand new to her and how Joyce actually started teaching her about Hanukkah back in Cali because the Byers are actually Jewish so El by extension is too. So then I was like, no way I’m Jewish too! I can help you guys celebrate Hanukkah! And then Jonathan was like, oh we should have a Hanukkah party. And then I said, fuck that, let’s just merge with Steve’s.” Eddie rambled, scrubbing at the potatoes while Steve watched, his brain trying to follow the conversation.

“So here you are?” Steve realized, a smile breaking out onto his face.

“So here I am!” Eddie replied, brandishing a potato with a cheeky grin. 

“Well my house is your oyster, so go crazy. I think it’s a great idea. I mean, shit Eddie I didn’t even know you were Jewish! We could have done this from the beginning.” Steve said, feeling a small spike of guilt as he gestured to his kitchen and beyond. 

“No worries Stevie, it’s not a big deal. I’m Jewish on my mom’s side so it’s not like it’s super obvious. Like why give people another reason to target me, y’know? I just think having a Christmas and Hanukkah party would be nice for El, and everyone else. So, I’m making latkes!” He explained, making himself at home in Steve’s kitchen. It made the guilt fade away into something warmer.

“I was actually about to take a shower and then run out to grab a few last minute things. You can use whatever you can find. There are bowls and plates in that cabinet and the cutting boards are in that one under the knife block.” Steve pointed out while Eddie gave him a jaunty salute. 

“No worries, big boy, I got this all under control. “He smiled, whipping out some cassettes from his backpack. Steve chuckled all the way up the stairs, the sound of Dio accompanying his shower.

~~~~~~~~

When Steve came back down the stairs, showered and dressed, the smell of oil and onions greeted him. Eddie had switched the music to something softer, still metal, but softer.

“Almost done?” He asked, startling Eddie in the middle of grating potatoes. The other boy flinched, and gave Steve an unimpressed glare. Then the pain caught up to him.

“Ah shit, cut my finger.” Eddie mumbled, a small dot of blood welling up on his knuckle. Steve sprung into action. He grabbed Eddie’s wrist, bringing his injured finger over to the sink to rinse in cold water. Then he grabbed his kitchen first aid kit, wisely kept under the sink, and dressed the minor wound with neosporin, a dinosaur bandage, and a soft kiss.

“Dinos huh?” Eddie asked, eyebrow raised.

“Oh shut up, it’s for the kids. Are you okay?” Steve shot back, blushing madly once he realized what he did. He was still holding Eddie’s hand as well. For some reason he didn’t want to let go. Not until Eddie assured him he was okay.

“Yeah I’m fine. It’s all part of the process anyway. You’re not making real latkes unless you cry or cut yourself. The blood adds flavor.”

“You got blood in the potatoes?!” Steve yelled, dropping Eddie’s hand and grabbing the bowl. He didn’t see any specks of red…

“Nah, probably not. That’s just an old wives’ saying, you know, to make the kids laugh when they hurt themselves while helping their moms.” Eddie replied, gently bumping his shoulder into Steve’s.

“Right, well, I’m going to head out before you give me a heart attack. Robin and the others should be here soon to finish decorating. I’ll be back in, like, an hour. Maybe a little more.” Steve said, grabbing his coat, scarf, and keys. Winter had officially come to Hawkins and he wasn’t taking any chances.

“Sounds good. Ooh, pick up some sour cream and applesauce while you’re out. We’ll need them for the latkes and you’re fresh out.” Eddie called over his shoulder. 

Steve nodded absently, tugging on his sneakers. Maybe a hat? Nah, he’d already done his hair and he didn’t want to have to do it again. 

He opened the door to a gust of wind that nearly knocked him on his ass, and felt all his hard work go to waste. 

“Hey, hold on. It’s cold out there. I know your hair is, like your thing, but I think protecting your whole head is a little more important.” Eddie teased, carefully placing a black knit hat over Steve’s head. It was the one he’d worn coming in and it smelled a little like tobacco smoke. They were very close and Steve could see the different shades of brown in Eddie’s eyes as he pulled the hat over his ears.

“There we go, nice and warm. See you in a bit.” Eddie said with finality, resting his hands on Steve’s shoulders. Struck with an almost uncontrollable urge to close the distance and kiss Eddie, Steve gave a shaky smile and pulled away. He didn’t look back as he closed the door behind him. The biting cold helped him remember what he needed to do and hopefully, eased the red he knew was on his cheeks.

~~~~~~~~

When Steve returned, bags in his arms, the house was full of light and noise. It seemed like almost everyone had come over during his absence and Eddie’s music had been replaced by the usual Christmas songs. 

Robin bounded over to him, Santa hat resting on her blonde head, and grabbed some of the bags. Then she took off the beanie Eddie had loaned him and replaced it with a Santa hat to match hers. Kissing her cheek in thanks, the two brought everything into the kitchen. One bag, Steve made sure to keep to himself.

Nancy and Jonathan greeted him as they started to empty the bags, putting things away. Eddie was at the stove, hair up in a messy ponytail. He gave a thumbs up when Steve showed him the sour cream and applesauce, lifting a golden brown latke out of the oil and onto a paper towel. 

“It smells great in here. I can’t wait to try them.” Steve said, stepping up close behind Eddie and peering over his shoulder.

“Thanks, it was my mom’s recipe. I’m actually so relieved they’re turning out so great. Last year I didn’t squeeze enough of the water out and they completely fell apart in the oil.”

“Ah rookie mistake but it happens to us all.” Jonathan piped up from his place leaning against the counter.

“Anyone want a beer?” Steve asked, opening his fridge to put away the sour cream. He got yeses from everyone, and pulled out a six pack. Someone screamed in the living room and every adult froze.

Then the sound of laughter reached them and Lucas yelled that El had to warn him before lifting him in the air. The adults in the kitchen relaxed, the fight going out of them like air in a balloon.

“I swear, these kids are gonna make me go grey.” Steve muttered, opening his beer. Once Eddie was done with the stove, he was going to pull out the mulled wine. He figured it would be nice for the older members of the party after dinner.

Dustin entered the kitchen, baseball hat firmly on his head. He was still dressed for the season though, sporting a handmade Christmas sweater that his mom had made him. It was bright red with green christmas trees and candy canes. Claudia had even weaved tinsel into the strands of the trees, making them sparkle. It was very charming and ridiculously ugly and Steve had a matching one upstairs.

“Is it almost time to eat? We finished decorating and I’m hungry.” He pouted, collapsing on the little table in the kitchen like he was too weak to stand. The others laughed.

“You see Eddie? This is your son.” Steve sighed, grabbing the plates and silverware. Eddie in turn, just cackled.

“Here, go make yourself useful and set the table for everyone.” Robin said, pointing to the plates and then to the dining room. Dustin gave a long suffering groan but did as he was told.

“And don’t forget a place for Argyle, he’s on his way.” Nancy called out, perfectly content to stay exactly where she was under Jonathan’s arm. Steve was just about to open his mouth and ask where the dude was, when the doorbell rang.

“I GOT IT!” Mike yelled skidding from the living room to the door in his fluffy socks. 

With the smell of pizza and sugar wafting, Argyle entered. His clothes were colorful and mismatching but still festive and Steve couldn’t help but laugh, his heart filled with that stupid Christmas joy everyone was always talking about.

“I brought the pizza and the jelly doughnuts dudes! So let’s eat, yeah?” He said, Mike leading him into the dining room to put down his boxes. Everyone, having heard his arrival, quickly ran to the table, eagerly awaiting the latkes. 

The adults in the kitchen joined them, leaving Steve and Eddie to each grab a platter. Eddie had the beautiful tower of latkes, while Steve spooned applesauce, sour cream, and jelly into bowls. 

The crowd cheered when the food was finally presented, everyone happily digging in. The quiet lasted for a few moments, everyone focused on putting their plate together and taking first bites. Then it exploded into the noise you’d expect from 7 kids and 6 adults. Heaps of praise were given to Eddie, everyone loving the latkes.

“These are way better than Mom’s.” Will whispered to his brother, causing them both to giggle. 

El asked for maple syrup at one point, which Steve got her, though he was confused.

“They’re pancakes? You eat pancakes with syrup right?” She asked sweetly, drowning said pancakes in it. Eddie laughed and took the syrup from her, adding it to his plate too.

“Right you are Supergirl! You can eat your latkes with whatever you want. I’ve even heard of some people using…” Here he paused for dramatic effect, “ketchup!” 

The whole table groaned as Eddie shuddered.

“Wait, that makes more sense than syrup. You eat French fries with ketchup, so why not latkes. It’s basically the same thing.”

“Try before you deny Steve-o.” Argyle piped up, a smear of sour cream on his chin. 

“Yeah, try before you deny!” El, Mike, and Will parroted back. 

“But it’s not just potato, there’s onion in it and- oh forget it. You guys are weird.” Steve sputtered, shaking his head. Eddie patted his knee under the table in a way that felt both condescending and settling. 

The group resumed eating their latkes and pizza, talking about holiday plans and hopes for the new year. Eddie told the story of Hanukkah as they ate, Jonathan and Will adding bits and pieces randomly. Someone, maybe Nancy, had lit candles in the middle of the table, giving the whole room a soft glow.

Steve glanced over at Robin sitting next to him, laughing at a barb Erica made towards Lucas, pizza grease on her fingers. Then he looked at Dustin, smiling wide, pearls on full display, while Max whispered something in El’s ear, the girl nodding in agreement. Finally he turned to Eddie on his other side, cutting up a latke and dipping it in syrup with a big smile on his face. He had taken his hair out of the ponytail from earlier and now it hung around his head in soft waves.

Steve wanted to do this every year. He wanted to do it every day. He wanted to do this with Eddie.

~~~~~~~~

Latkes and pizza eaten, the Party had migrated into the living room for presents and dessert. Steve was warming up the mulled wine when Eddie bounded in, looking for his backpack. 

“I figure we can light the menorah and then open presents. It’s dark enough that it’ll look really nice next to the tree.” He explained, pulling out a box of candles.

“Oh wait, don’t move, I’ll be right back!” Steve said, running up the stairs to his bedroom where he’d stashed the last bag from today. He ran back down, almost out of breath from how fast he moved and presented the bag to Eddie.

Looking confused and a little worried, Eddie opened the bag and pulled out a pretty gold candle holder. 

“It’s a menorah! I got it for you, for Hanukkah. I mean, I got you another present for Christmas but I felt bad that you weren’t getting anything for your holiday so I found it at the store and thought you’d like it. Do you like it?” Steve said, feeling his nerves creeping up on him. 

Eddie hadn’t moved, or changed his expression. He just stared down at his present in shock. 

“Oh fuck, I messed up, didn’t I? You hate it? I wasn’t supposed to get that for you, I was overstepping. You probably have a super nice one and I’m being rude. You can return it, I think the receipt’s in the bag…” He rambled, feeling more and more like Robin with every passing moment. What the hell, he used to be smooth! But instead he could feel his heart jackrabbiting in his chest as Eddie put down the candle holder and stepped closer to Steve. Shit, he was gonna get punched now.

But instead, Eddie gently grabbed his face, stopping the rant mid word and kissed him.

All of Steve’s thoughts froze dead in their tracks. Luckily his body seemed to pick up the pace faster than Steve, because after a moment of surprise, his arms came to wrap around Eddie’s shoulders. He didn’t know why Eddie was kissing him, but he’d be damned if he didn’t make the most of it.

Eventually, oxygen became important and they had to break apart. Eddie was flushed, smiling brightly. Steve knew he had a similar dopey look on his face.

“That’s not a menorah.” Eddie whispered, kissing Steve again all soft and sweet.

“It’s not? But it has the spots for your candles.” He pointed out, pulling away from Eddie to grab it. Laughing quietly, Eddie wrapped his arms around Steve’s waist, resting a chin on his shoulder from behind.

“A menorah for Hanukkah needs 9 spots. One for each night and one for the helper candle, called a shamash. This one only has 6 but it’s beautiful and I appreciate the gesture. It means a lot that you wanted to get me something for Hanukkah.” Eddie said, kissing Steve’s cheek as he slumped against him.

“Well shit. I’m sorry.” He mumbled, giving said candle holder a glare. Eddie shook his head and turned Steve around.

“Nah, it’s perfect. It came from you and I love it.”

Steve leaned forward to kiss him again, feeling drunk with joy, when Robin’s voice echoed into the kitchen. 

“Hey what’s the hold up? The kids wanna open presents!”

Steve and Eddie laughed and unhappily pulled themselves apart. Eddie grabbed an actual menorah from his backpack and went into the living room while Steve poured out wine for everyone. They had candles to light and presents to open!

~~~~~~~~

Once everyone was in the living room and huddled around the fireplace mantle, they began. Jonathan pulled out a bag of yarmulkes, saved by Joyce over the years, for the boys to wear if they wanted. Steve got a gold satin one with the inscription Sammy and Ellen, A Golden Anniversary 1980. He hoped it brought him luck. Dustin put his on top of his baseball hat. (”It’s a gift from Suzie, I can’t take it off!”)

Eddie, Jonathan,  and Will said the prayers while lighting the candles, El and Nancy shakily following along. The sound was beautiful with all the different voices coming together. The prayer didn’t seem too complicated and it had a pretty rhythm. Eddie’s pinky brushed against Steve’s and linked for a moment which was probably Steve’s favorite part.

Candles lit and tree turned on, the kids flopped onto the floor to exchange presents. Steve may have gone a bit overboard this year, but the various squeals of delight made the hole in his wallet worth it. 

They drank the wine and ate the doughnuts, sufganiyot was what Eddie called it, as Will explained dreidel to them. 

“I’m not so sure this is a good idea. You guys can get pretty competitive...” Nancy said, looking wary.

“It’s not a competition if you know you’re gonna win.” Max scoffed, flicking her red hair over her shoulder. This started a lively debate about if dreidel was anything more than a game of chance. Eddie passed out gelt, one of which Argyle immediately unwrapped and ate. Considering there were so many of them, teams were picked.

Jonathan and Nancy. Will and Lucas. El and Max. Robin and Steve. Dustin and Mike. Eddie, Erica, and Argyle as the true wildcard team.

“You guys are going down!” Robin shouted, pointing at every other team.

“Oh please, like I’m going to lose to you. You still owe me ice cream.” Erica shot back, crossing her little arms across her chest.

They played for a good amount of time, Steve paying little attention to the clock on the wall. The candles in Eddie’s menorah slowly burned down as the Christmas lights twinkled. 

Finally, after much hemming and hawing and claims of cheating, one team stood victorious. 

El and Max sat behind the largest pile of gelt, smiling widely and looking very smug. Eddie proclaimed them the winners and scooped Max up, Jonathan following with El, and paraded them around the living room to cheers from their adoring fans.

Someone turned the radio back on, Christmas music playing quietly under the conversations. Steve, pressed up tight against Eddie on the couch, couldn’t remember a more enjoyable Christmas. Normally he’d spend the season alone, his parents coming home on the 25th to exchange gifts and then flit off to some fancy party. He’d gotten offers to spend the day with others, Robin and Dustin and his old friends, but he turned them down. He hated feeling like the odd man out. 

But now, with everyone in his home, warm and safe and happy, that feeling was gone. He was with his family, one that he had found and loved all by himself.

Plus Eddie, smelling like powdered sugar, oil, cinnamon, smoke, and all of Steve’s dreams rolled into one. Plus Eddie, who shared his heritage with all of them. Plus Eddie, who kissed him in the kitchen with the promise of more.

Finishing his cup of wine, Eddie leaned forward to place it on the coffee table, before laying back against the couch. His arm came up to wrap around Steve’s shoulders with a contented sigh. Steve mimicked the sound and snuggled deeper into the couch and Eddie.

Robin caught his eye and raised her eyebrow. Steve flushed and used their best friend/platonic soulmate mind reading powers to tell her they’d talk about it tomorrow. She gave the two of them a long, searching look, but apparently happy with what she saw, turned back to her conversation with Nancy.

~~~~~~~~

Much later, when everyone had left and the house was empty, Steve and Eddie cleaned up. They threw away wrapping paper and pizza boxes, picking up balls of metal gelt wrappers to toss as well. Eddie cleaned up the oil and the leftover potatoes. Steve boxed up food for Wayne and Keith, hoping to get in good with both. It was especially important now that he had a boyfriend.

Wait, did he?

“Does Hanukkah have any other traditions that we didn’t do?” He asked abruptly. Eddie wiped down the stovetop and made a noncommittal noise, focused on a stubborn grease mark.

“Like Christmas has tons of random traditions, does Hanukkah have those too?” He continued, resting his hands on his hips.

“Um well, I guess maybe if you’re Sephardic or from a completely different country. But as far as I know, we basically did everything for Hanukkah. We’re done for the night. Why? Was there something else you wanted to do?” Eddie asked, throwing out the paper towel.

“Well I wanted to know if Hanukkah had anything like mistletoe. I like mistletoe.” Steve whispered, suddenly embarrassed.

“I literally kissed you a few hours ago, you don’t need mistletoe if you want to do that again.” Eddie laughed, taking a step closer to Steve. 

“Yeah but it’s more romantic that way. Like I could kiss you”, which Steve did, “and then ask if you wanted to be my boyfriend. That would be so festive and romantic.”

Eddie sputtered and rested his head on Steve’s shoulder, pressing a kiss to his bare neck. 

“I don’t know. What you just did there was pretty romantic. Consider me wooed. Also yes, of course. I’ve been crushing on you since the moment you found me in the boathouse.” He admitted in the quiet of the kitchen. Steve’s heat soared and he lifted Eddie’s head to kiss him again.

“Happy Hanukkah Eddie. I had a really nice time tonight.”

“Happy Hanukkah Steve. Nes gadol haya poh.”

~~~~~~~~