#mark twain headcanons

[localanimequeerio-17]

headcanons about mark twain because no one talks about him enough

- Mark is a trans man and bisexual

- Loves to do anything to pump his adrenaline (skydiving, zip lining, jet skiing, etc.)

- Is definitely a dog person

- He hates to hunt; he is an animal lover

- Out of the two he's more inclined to talk to Huck Finn

- His only emotional outlet is his own ability: Huck Finn and Tom Sawyer

- Praise kink

[blvcklizard]

Ridiculous BSD headcanons I refuse to let go of

Lucy and Poe bonded over their crushes on an ADA member and are best friends now

Tecchou is ambidextrous

Both Higuchi and Tachihara had their bi awakening when they found out that Gin was a girl

Twain has a YouTube channel and only stopped uploading random casual moments of the other members or him playing pranks on them after Fitzgerald threatened to fire him

[ecoamerica]

Watch the American Climate Leadership Awards 2024 now: https://youtu.be/bWiW4Rp8vF0?feature=shared

The American Climate Leadership Awards 2024 broadcast recording is now available on ecoAmerica's YouTube channel for viewers to be inspired by active climate leaders. Watch to find out which finalist received the $50,000 grand prize! Hosted by Vanessa Hauc and featuring Bill McKibben and Katharine Hayhoe!

[angosbbg]

☆ mark twain headcanons

— — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — —

— — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — —

| —»» SFW

(this is x reader btw)

— — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — —

– he definitely would have the fluffiest and softest hair in existence. pls play with it he loves it so much. he absolutely adores the feeling of your fingers twirling his hair while he polishes his gun.

– he absolutely loves resting his head on your lap or just you in general. he's often tired after work and the feeling of you and the smell of you is enough to cheer him up!

– definitely talks about you to tom and huck. pls save them they're done with hearing him talk about you all the damn time.

– if you get embarrassed at all he WILL embarrass himself 10x more than you so you won't feel so bad.

– would give the world to you. the sound of your voice is enough to make him happy and the look of your smile makes his heart so warm.

– if you feel insecure about anything he'll immediately notice and start reassuring you that you're perfect.

– if his words aren't enough, he'll take action. he won't let you leave the house until you feel better about yourself. this man worships the ground you walk on.

– arguments with him don't last long because he always apologizes first. he comes up to you, teary eyed and sniffling while apologizing. he cannot hold a grudge against people.

– it's canon that most people find him annoying so the fact that you don't is so amazing to him.

– he absolutely adores you, anytime you wear anything new this man absolutely DROOLS over you. like damn get off the ground bro 😭😭

— — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — —

| —»» NSFW

— — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — —

– he's up for anything as long as it doesn't involve anyone getting seriously injured <33

– wanna peg him?? he'd let you. gladly. if you're happy, he's happy.

– perfect boy in bed, you wanna top? call him your little slut and he'll comply happily. wanna be the bottom? he'd be happy to top you!

– honestly he's a switch but he prefers to be the bottom.

– will eat you out. it's actually one of his favorite things to do tbh. he likes eating you out.

– you want him to tie you up? gladly!! you want to tie him up? put those ropes on darling <33

– definitely likes being called your little dog or little boy..... probably has a mommy/daddy kink if you're into that.

– will do anything you want him to. he's just that good.

– definitely a fan of being pegged. but he also loves giving you pleasure, he loves the noises and your little reactions!!

– absolute darling in bed. he's so gentle with you at first and if you want him to be rough he will!!

– best aftercare ever... this man is so soft and gentle with you.

– probably likes shower sex. (i lied he loves it.)

– loves it when you sit on his lap.

– he whines and whimpers. breathy gasps and moans.

– his thrusts get sloppier the closer he gets to cumming.

– mumbles and whimpers out your name in your ear when he thrusts into you, he does it very involuntarily.

– tried cockwarming with you once. bro COULD NOT hold back.

– all in all, he loves you very much.

— — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — —

— — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — —

A/N: i love mark so much. im so normal about him

[emomarktwain]

Guild members most used emojis

Nathaniel: 🖤 ❌ 📖 ✝️👎

Mark: 💥🎉😼😹🔫

Margaret: 🩷🤦‍♀️🍵💚💐

Louisa: 💞☕📚❓💟

Francis: 💵🫰🇱🇷🦅‼️

Steinbeck: 🍇🤍👍☺️

Lovecraft: 👍🐙🍫 (doesn't understand emojis D:)

Lucy: 🪡🔪😤🤦‍♀️👎

Poe: 📜🦝😓☕⚰️

Herman: ☺️👍♥️🙏🐋

James: 👓😐🖐️(idk bro died)

[viiimancia]

THE GUILD x DEMON DAYS!

wait- bsd s4 trailer 2 has released?!

[zickyvici]

Rating whether or not BSD men are ass or boob guys

-----------------------------------------

Ass guys

☆ Dazai

☆ Chuuya

☆ Tachihara

☆ Nikolai

☆ Fukuchi

☆ Jono

☆ Mark Twain

Boob guys

☆ Kunikida

☆ Atsushi

☆ Ranpo

☆ Akutagawa

☆ Poe

☆ Fyodor

☆ Tetcho

☆ Sigma

[ecoamerica]

Watch the 2024 American Climate Leadership Awards for High School Students now: https://youtu.be/5C-bb9PoRLc

The recording is now available on ecoAmerica's YouTube channel for viewers to be inspired by student climate leaders! Join Aishah-Nyeta Brown & Jerome Foster II and be inspired by student climate leaders as we recognize the High School Student finalists. Watch now to find out which student received the $25,000 grand prize and top recognition!

[lesbiankordian]

BSD BIRTHDAYS

I believe they have joint birthday parties in the PM. Kajii being like "let me take care of the cake, boss" and it turning out to be a lemon bomb cake.

Ango and Oda celebrating their birthdays together :)).

Or, a more angsty hc: Ango not being able to spend this day normally because the memories from when he was in the PM hit even harder.

Also sth sth about Ranpo and Oda having birthdays so close to each other. And about Ango and Rimbaud, who both have complicated histories with the people they were close to.

The fact that these three have birthdays on almost the same day is literally so perfect. I wanna see Fitzgerald throwing a big party for them. And Mark and Lucy just having fun and being silly on their birthday.

Imagine Kunikida making sure everything goes according to plan on Kenji's birthday. And when the party starts, he finds out its also one for him :) (because it's nice but also because the agency's tight on budget and making 2 parties in 1 saves money. Ranpo was against the idea, but he agreed when the rest promised to eat cake on Kunikida's birthday as well). And later they also celebrate Aya's birthday.

Other interesting ones:

Also Kouyou and Fukuzawa (Jan 10) and the jokes of Mori buying them the same presents 😭.

[wtowingedtragicobsidian]

BDS Gender & Orientation HCs pt3 The Guild

~if a character/commentary is not included I’m just assuming they’re cis/straight~

Lucy:

Gender:|Transwoman| Uses feminine pronouns.

John:

Orientation: |Straight| But has definitely kissed men.

Lovecraft:

Gender: |unspecified| ??? Doesn’t seem to understand the concept of gender but will respond to masculine, neutral or impersonal pronouns. Doesn’t refer to himself often and when he does it’s not in a gendered way.

Orientation: |unspecified| ??? Unclear if he experiences attraction at all. He seems confused/indifferent to interpersonal connections in general.

*yes we are on the eldritch horror agenda

Mark:

Gender: |Transmasc| Uses masculine pronouns but is fine with neutral ones as well.

Orientation: |Bi| Loves chatting(flirting) with people and is very good at it. He has that playful charm that always hits the mark; making the other person feel special without being pushy or coming across as a creep.  He’s seen kissing a lot of people but despite his seemingly casual demeanor he rarely goes past that unless they are in a committed relationship.

*has been in a poly relationship before, and while it’s not a requirement it’s definitely something on the table for his relationships going forward

*yes he is the one John kissed. It was a party. Lovecraft accidentally said something that John’s tipsy pride took as a dare and he got Mark to kiss him. Mark still teases him about it. Lucy has a video of the whole ordeal.

Poe:

Gender: |Demiboy| Uses masculine and neutral pronouns. They shop in the womens’ section to get a lot of their comfy clothes and shoes— when they are feeling particularly outgoing that is, most of their shopping is done online cus they don’t want to be around people.  

Orientation: |Ace, Demiromantic-Gay| Didn’t care much about attraction as he found men attractive but didn’t feel attracted to them. Eventually he found somebody who incited feelings deeper than just fleeting acknowledgment and aesthetic appreciation.

Herman:

Orientation: |Bi| unassuming Bi grandpa. He seems like the type to have a wife and kids somewhere but enough supportive comments about young love being so sweet when refencing queer couples, volunteering confirmation if a man is highly attractive, and stories reminiscing on the good old days with his ‘friends’ had most of the Guild independently coming to the realization that he is in fact queer. It’s still up in the air if Herman himself knows though.  

[bungou-stray-butterfly]

MarkAtsu Headcanon 1

You know that midwestern thing where you can go outside and smell whether it's going to rain or not? Mark is almost supernaturally good at it. He can go outside, sniff the air and tell you when it'll rain and for how long.

Atsushi doubted him at first, but after witnessing him in action a few times, he trusts Mark more than any other weather channel.

[diagonal-queen]

𝐁𝐒𝐃 𝐌𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭

🌼 = Fluff 🔞 = Smut ⛓ = Dark content 💔 = Angst 🥀 = Hurt/Comfort 🤕 = Whump 🔷 = Other

Armed Detective Agency:

↪ Atsushi Nakajima

↪ Osamu Dazai

That Place (Dazai x gn!Reader) 💔

↪ Doppo Kunikida

Two of Two Kinds (Kunikida x fem!Reader) 🌼

↪ Kyouka Izumi

↪ Ranpo Edogawa

↪ Akiko Yosano

↪ Kenji Miyazawa

↪ Yukichi Fukuzawa

Port Mafia:

↪ Ryuunosuke Akutagawa

↪ Chuuya Nakahara

His New Trainee (Chuuya x fem!Reader) 🔷

Welcome Gift (Chuuya x gn!Reader) 🌼

The Man and the Puppies (Chuuya x gn!Reader) 🌼

Mutually Beneficial Transaction (Chuuya x gn!Reader) 🌼

On the Verge (Chuuya x fem!Reader) 🤕

Calmer Waters (Chuuya x gn!Reader) 🥀

Star-Crossed (Chuuya x gn!Reader) 🌼

Rockstar Chuuya (Chuuya x gn!Reader) 🌼🔞

↪ Michizou Tachihara

Random Tachihara Headcanons 🔷

michizou tachihara as your highschool boyfriend (Tachihara x gn!Reader) 🔷

Unspoken (Tachihara x gn!Reader) 🥀

↪ Gin Akutagawa

↪ Ichiyo Higuchi

↪ Kouyou Ozaki

Sakura Kisses (Kouyou x gn!Reader) 🌼

↪ Sakunosuke Oda

Decay of Angels:

↪ Fyodor Dostoyevsky

Discipline (Fyodor x gn!Reader) ⛓

Tired Turtle Doves (Fyodor x gn!Reader x Mykola) 🌼

Dark Roses and Souls (Fyodor x Mykola) 🌼

↪ Mykola Hohol

nikolai x reader in the winter (Mykola x gn!Reader) 🌼

Tired Turtle Doves (Fyodor x gn!Reader x Mykola) 🌼

Dark Roses and Souls (Fyodor x Mykola) 🌼

↪ Sigma

Vanilla and Lavender (Sigma x gn!Reader) 🌼

The Other Perspective (Sigma x fem!Reader) 🌼

Home Is Where the Heart Is (Sigma x gn!Reader) 🥀

The Guild:

↪ Lucy Maud Montgomery

fluffy lucy headcanons (Lucy x gn!Reader) 🌼

↪ Edgar Allan Poe

↪ Mark Twain

Watermelon Cruiser (Mark x gn!Reader) 🔷

Hunting Dogs:

↪ Ouchi Fukuchi

↪ Saigiku Jouno

Jouno with a quiet and touchy S/O (Jouno x gn!Reader) 🌼

↪ Tecchou Suehiro

Lovesick Tecchou Headcanons (Tecchou x gn!Reader) 🌼⛓

↪ Teruko Okura

Other:

↪ Mushitarou Oguri

Secret Secret (Mushitarou x gn!Reader) 💔

↪ Paul Verlaine

The Moon and the Sea (Verlaine x Rimbaud) 🌼

↪ Arthur Rimbaud

The Moon and the Sea (Verlaine x Rimbaud) 🌼

Misc. Headcanons:

how i think bsd characters would hug: ada edition (ADA)

how i think bsd characters would hug: pm edition (PM)

Reader who sleeps with a tank top (Dazai, Ranpo, Chuuya)

Reader who sleeps in a nightgown (Dazai, Ranpo, Fyodor, Mykola, Poe)

Being their Older Sibling (Kyouka, Kenji)

Reader who is flexible (Dazai, Chuuya, Fyodor)

Helping to take care of a reader who struggles to eat (Atsushi, Dazai, Chuuya, Oda, Fyodor)

Reader who is flexible pt. 2 (Kunikida, Mykola, Sigma)

how i think bsd characters would hug: misc edition (Jouno, Tecchou, Sigma, Mushitarou)

They find out you're Dazai's sibling (Chuuya, Fyodor)

When they have a nightmare about you (Atsushi, Dazai, Chuuya, Tecchou)

When Reader flinches after they yell (Kunikida, Ranpo, Fukuzawa, Chuuya, Poe)

An S/O who has their opposite personality (Fyodor, Mykola)

Reader being the "perfect" assistant (Kunikida, Chuuya)

When their S/O is a compulsive liar (Dazai, Ranpo, Yosano, Chuuya, Fyodor, Mykola)

Reader with trauma and trust issues (Dazai, Chuuya, Fyodor)

When their daughter tells them she has a boyfriend (Dazai, Chuuya, Fyodor, Sigma)

An S/O who outsmarts them (Dazai, Fyodor)

Their first kiss with you (Atsushi, Oda, Lucy, Tecchou)

If the BSD boys were my coworkers (Atsushi, Dazai, Kunikida, Ranpo, Akutagawa, Chuuya, Poe, Steinbeck)

Them with a manipulative S/O (Dazai, Chuuya, Fyodor)

Them with an S/O who meows (Ranpo, Chuuya, Jouno)

When you blow them a kiss (Tachihara, Tecchou)

S/O who hides under the bed (Dazai, Kunikida, Chuuya)

Rubber duckie, you're the one~ (Atsushi, Dazai, Ranpo, Chuuya, Mykola, Poe, Tecchou)

If the BSD girls were my coworkers (Kyouka, Yosano, Kouyou, Gin, Higuchi, Naomi, Lucy)

The Flags in Highschool (The Flags)

"Can't Sleep?" (Dazai, Kunikida, Fyodor)

"Men with Slutty Waists!" (Dazai, Chuuya)

Cuddling Headcanons (Tecchou, Jouno)

BSD boys with a self-sacrificing girlfriend (Fyodor, Poe, Ranpo, Jouno)

Hunting Dogs Headcanons:

Hunting Dogs with an energetic S/O

Hunting Dogs with an S/O who eats ice

When their S/O feels inadequate

Hunting Dogs with a clumsy S/O

Hunting Dogs with a silent S/O

Hunting Dogs with your child

Hunting Dogs with a mean S/O

Obviously I will continue to update this list as I release new fics but it might take some time between each new fic and me updating this, sorry! Also if there's a character you like that I haven't put here, you can still send reqs for them!

[edutainer2022]

@lenfantdeverone , @idontknowreallywhy, @janetm74 I don't think Spotify is available in my country, so I did it longhand - just went through my mp3 playlist, trawling for everything that is "Scott" in my head (themes, lyrics, vibes, something he would like, something that goes along with some headcanons or Scott fics I read) - there's no system, but there IS a rather recognizable pattern, I guess:

Nothing_Breaks_Like_a_Heart_(Mark Ronson)

Imagine Dragons - Believer

paul_mccartney_-_hope_of_deliverance

P!nk - Try

kate-bush-Running-up-that-hill

one republic-I-aint-worried

Nickelback - Million Miles An Hour

Nickelback  -  If Today Was Your Last Day

Daniel Powter - Bad Day

Sky Full of Song (Florence & The Machine)

disturbed-The-sound-of-silence

How You Remind Me (Nickleback)

Nickelback_-_Far_Away

The Darkness - I believe in a thing called love

Metallica - Unforgiven

lp-Lost-on-you

Taylor Swift - Red (Taylor's Version) (2021)

taylor-swift-Anti-hero

shania-twain-I'm-gonna-getcha-good

Sinead_OConnor_-_Nothing_Compares_2_U

AC-DC - Thunderstruck

Kenny_Loggins_-_Danger_Zone

lady-gaga-Hold-my-hand

Hold_back_the_river_-_james_bay

bonnie-tyler-total-eclipse-of-the-heart + I need a hero

Carole King - Where You Lead

Nickelback — Trying Not To Love You

Nickelback — When We Stand Together

Nickelback_-_If_Everyone_Cared

Imagine Dragons - Thunder

The Weeknd — Blinding Lights

Harold Faltermeyer — Top Gun Anthem (Film Version)

the-smiths-How-soon-is-now

Joan_Osborne_-_One_Of_Us

Scorpions - Rock You Like a Hurricane

Bryan Adams – You Can't Take Me I'm Free

Bryan Adams – Brothers Under The Sun

Bryan Adams – Here I Am

Bryan Adams feat. Sting, Rod Stewart – All For Love (From The Three Musketeers)

maria_burmaka_- Той, той, хто зі мною/ The one with me

Fleur — Сегодня / Today

Bon Jovi – Have A Nice Day

Bon Jovi – You Give Love A Bad Name

Kansas - Carry on My Wayward Son

Green Day - Boulevard of Broken Dreams

Electric Light Orchestra - Mr. Blue Sky

Marvin Gaye & Tammi Terrell - Ain't No Mountain High Enough

Lyra-Falling

a-great-big-world-Say Something, I'm Giving Up on You

tom-odell-Another-love

the_pierces_-_three_wishes

Timbaland – Its too late to apologize

Simon & Garfunkel – Sound of Silence (Hello darkness, my old friend)

skillet_-_awake_and_alive

skillet-monster

Tailor Swift – I knew you were trouble

nightwish_-I_wish_i_had_an_angel

Rachel Platten – Stand By You

Shakira – Underheath your clothes

Mans Zelmerlow - Heroes

melnica_- Господин горных дорог/Lord of Mountain Roads

nickelback_-_Hero

nickelback_-_Savin'_me

Nightwish – End Of All Hope

green_day_-_Wake_me_up_when_september_ends

sekret_ Безпечный ездок/Reckless Rider

Bravo - Это за окном рассвет/ It's the dawn in the window

ChaiF - Поплачь о нём, пока он живой / Mourn him till he's alive

Keha – Die Young

kancler_gi - Брат мой, брат/ Brother mine, brother

eric_clapton_-_Blue_eyes_blue

fleur_- Расскажи мне о своей катастрофе/Tell me of your catastrophe

gary_jules_-Mad_world

Demi Livato - Give-your-heart-a-break

Lullaby (Hunger Games)

David_Guetta_feat._Sia_-_Titanium

bon_jovi_-_It's_my_life

30seconds to Mars – The Kill

The Feeling - Love It When You Call

a-ha_-_Crying_in_the_rain

Age of Information - Shattered (And-I've-lost-who-I-am)

avicii_Hey_brother

kantsler_gi- Вы ненавидите меня так страстно/ You hate me so passionately

phillip_phillips_Gone_gone_gone

Suzanne_vega_Solitude_standing

Queen- Show must go on

florence_the_machine_Seven_devils

imagine_dragons_Demons

[thewertsearch]

Asks Comp - 16/4

I literally did not know The Baby Is You was a thing. To be welcomed back into the comic like this after four months is very on brand for Homestuck.

... and wow, its outro really does match the end of this song, doesn't it? That's even funnier than if he'd snuck some of Megalovania in there.

Ooh, that's another liveblog I'll want to check out when I'm done! I've never actually seen a Worm liveblog before. Adding it to the list myself!

Nothing's really changed since I've been gone! I make a conscious effort not to do much Homestuck analysis off-blog, since I want my journey to be fully documented here.

It's good to be back! I'm looking forward to a full reread when I'm done.

Would you believe I didn't even know there was a book?

I also didn't know the movie had two (allegedly) terrible sequels, which is very funny. Neverending story indeed.

Thank you! I can't take too much credit, though - most of my tagging system has been crowdsourced from askers!

At some point, before we reach the end of the comic, I'm going to have to formalize my approach to liveblogging Homestuck's side content.

What I'll probably do is give each of them the 'lite' treatment initially, but if they turn out to be more canonical than I thought, or particularly interesting to liveblog, I'll 'zoom in', and analyze them properly. We'll see how we go!

Could you imagine the relationship dynamics in your average troll soap opera? The shipping web for a single season would make our heads explode.

It's a fun question. What sort of object symbolizes everything?

The first thing I'd try would be a star chart, Dave's magnifier and a literal planetful of Grist.

Added to the list! Not until later later on, though - I'd worry that the opinions and theories of another liveblogger could interfere with my own, especially if they're talking about it with someone who's already read it!

I would find it hard to disagree.

Do people think Act 1 is pointless?

I mean, it is the slowest Act in terms of pacing, but slow pacing isn't always a bad thing. You sort of have to take it slow when your readers have this much to get to grips with.

...okay, maybe we didn't need quite as many Sylladex mishaps as we got. But we still needed some. Homestuck has a lot to introduce you to.

I always pictured an English accent for Hass - although, interestingly, I didn't picture one for Jade. As a headcanon, I like the NZ one better.

Where did Grandpa grow up again, actually? He was raised by Fake Mark Twain, who was from Missouri - but I don't have a clue what a Missouri accent sounds like, let alone one from a century ago. I have a funny feeling that it's not the accent I'm imagining coming from Jade.

Now that's a ship I'd never have seen coming. Props to Hussie for coming up with something more controversial than my Feferi<>Equius.

All four kids, with four endgame weapons, might be able to challenge Jack's current incarnation - but they're not going to get the chance. You've hit the nail on the head - he's semi-perfect Jack for a reason.

I have several theories for Jade's prototyping, and every single one of them would make Jack even more dangerous than before. It's just barely possible to challenge him now, but things will only get worse.

Read the room, Serket!

Would Vriska have tried to negotiate? She feels like the type of person who'd rather take a beating than admit they're outclassed. Plus, I'm not sure how much she'd have to offer Aradia, who seemed entirely motivated by revenge (and, possibly, secretly motivated by timeline stuff).

All that said, I would have loved to hear Vriska trying to worm her way out of this.

I love it! Please send in the completed house, if you get the chance. That's going to look so cool with a moving meteor.

And they're both easily distractible! This feels like two people who might actually get on surprisingly well, if they were in, say, the same high school class.

It's hard to say what's a rarepair, since I don't know what ships are rare in the fandom - although I'd have a few guesses about the most common ones.

If we're going for a ship with very tenuous connections, I will submit Rose x Feferi for your appraisal. They're both fans of the Noble Circle, and their signature colors are pretty close.

You know what, I'll just review all of your ships. Tavros/Gamzee - PB&J - is pretty cute. [] I'd recommend Miracle Child for a number of reasons, but it does include a well-written Gamtav. Jack/Droog is more <> to me than it is <3. Like One Sundered Star might be influencing that? I'm not really sure. Somewhere I think I saw a Jack<>Droog. Your pre-shipping chart post isn't in the chrono; also, I'm pretty sure the A6A6I5 ask is one of mine. Gamzee/Eridan is a rarepair; I've seen it, but not often, and it's a <> in the fic I'm referencing. Kanaya<>Terezi and Feferi<>Vriska are strange enough that I've never seen them anywhere, really. [] And finally, Vriska and Tavros. These two are the textbook example of why the ashen quadrant needs to exist, and they're a perfect pair for it. [] ~LOSS (8/1/23)

I don't even know if Carapacians have moirallegiance - but those two would definitely work if they did.

Out of all my ships you flagged as rare, I think my favorite is Feferi<>Vriska. I just think they'd gel weirdly well together!

[emomarktwain]

Mark Twain headcanons!

Deaf in one ear, gunshots are really loud so it makes sense

Super fluffy hair, he can never brush it down (i wanna play with his hair tbh)

Has two siblings!!! One half-sister and one half-brother, same mom but not dad!!!

Had a emo phase 😞 still listens to MSI, but also likes millionaires, waterParks, electric callboy and Hollywood undead

Grew up in Mississippi... Real close to a Forest

Also used to pick up random turtles and keep them as pets, he named one Mikey (yes like the TMNT turtle)

Also talking about TMNT, he loves it and Pokemon. Fav TMNT turtle is Mikey (duh) favorite Pokemon is Zeraora. tom and huck's favorite Pokemon is Magneton hehe

Got ADHD and is dyslexic

Transmasc and pansexual!!!! He proudly shows off his top surgery scars

Has a sibling relationship with Lucy:) (ykyk this is just something silly. I'm the real Mark and my little brother is the real Lucy!! Soooo why not:3)

Has (and will again) said to Nathaniel, Margaret, Poe AND John "what if we kissed?"

[columboscreens]

What's your headcanons for Columbo?

Does he have a wife? Does he have over 10 murderer boyfriends? Etc

part of what makes columbo so fun to watch is that the showrunners essentially wanted you to make headcanons about columbo. much of the intended fun and mystique of the character is thinking about his personal life and what makes him tick.

now as for me, i'm completely nuts, so asking me about my columbo headcanons is like opening pandora's box. it's overwhelming. i have headcanons about what the man wears when he begrudgingly remembers to take out the trash at 11 pm. so i'll try to keep it short with my more sane and general ones:

his name is francesco

his wife is real. it's fun to imagine him single, but the wifeless theory doesn't hold much water. as time went on, the writers made a conscious and overt decision to make columbo's wife a real entity. between private phone calls and cruise trips, it becomes an active effort for one to ignore her presence, despite the fact that you never see her. in fact, they came close to showing her:

my headcanon for them is that they're like most interesting couples: similar in important ways, but complementary. e.g. columbo clawed his way out of high school, she finished postgrad summa cum laude. he's messy, she's clean. he loves gourmet cooking, she burns water. she's a techie, he couldn't hack his way out of a paper bag. she has her series 7 license, he kind of knows what a stock is. etc.

he reads. constantly. even if it's just the newspaper

he's more refined than he lets on. columbo may be a self-proclaimed chili-eating mark twain louis armstrong cream soda kind of guy who confuses HVAC ductwork for art installations, but i think he's someone who cares about the integrity of the things around him. he has taste. he's realistic, he values simplicity, but he's not a rube. he appreciates quality items, good food, good music, and fine traits in people.

he's more introverted than he lets on. he can be garrulous and friendly with strangers, but lots of times we find him silent and/or lost in thought. he largely works alone and we often see him alone off the clock.

his job affects him more than he lets on. i mean kind of a given, right? he's seen it all, but he's still human. aside from being perpetually tired and hungry because he's hyperfixating on his work, i imagine he has some degree of post-traumatic stress. in my head columbo wakes up sometimes in a cold sweat thinking about the girl who jumped off a balcony or the guy strangled to death at the gym

he was a troublemaker as a kid. i love imagining him as an agent of the law born out of his chaotic, delinquent upbringing. i sometimes entertain the theory that he's killed or had someone close to him killed as an impetus for the sheer drive he has for his work. i also think he was definitely the most annoying motherfucker on the block as a kid and his brothers bullied him for it so hard he turned it into a strength

his fashion sense is actually good. more of a gripe i have than a headcanon. it irks me when people diss columbo's fit. young columbo clearly knows how to dress, and stock standard columbo changes subtly throughout the show. but the basics--the tan raincoat, grey/reddish/brown suit, white/creme button-down, dark green tie, brown chukka boots--are very well-coordinated in color and material. they're baggy out of necessity, not sloppiness. he moves around constantly and thus prioritizes comfort in a job and milieu that require a suit and tie in sunny southern california. it makes perfect sense that he'd eschew a sharply tailored worsted wool getup and opt for roomy linen! he dislikes overly tight clothes. which leads me to...

...he's a certified Freak and he gets "weirder" with age as he grows less and less concerned with how he comes off to others--"masking", so to speak. related to this is that the raincoat is his safety blanket, as he's sensitive to textures and levels of pressure/constriction. just look at him trying to think in the Wrong Coat:

he's got a thing for belly dancers:

sometimes he'll swing by the grocery store at 10 pm to pick up something for the wife and when nobody is looking he rides his shopping cart through the store like this

he has a strategy when he goes to buffets. the little old lady in front of him may be piling noodles and rice onto her plate but columbo's got so much steak and shrimp on his that they're about to ask him to leave

[skyepixels]

I've been contemplating for the longest time putting more of my little headcanons out there before Clown updates their website, but its so close now so I'm just gonna throw them all out there for fun! Wally; As enigmatic as he is, the best description that I can give to what I believe he's like is this quote:

"I can do no wrong, for I do not know what it is."

He's this charming blank slate of a puppet, more so than the other characters, and I think that's what's most engaging about him. He knows so little! Like, the way that the characters would act around him, helping him be picked up when he's left laying on the ground, or the way that Barnaby tries to teach him about making jokes or the way Julie teaches him how to respond to getting hurt. Like, basic functions of what's considered normal are completely brand new concepts again, because those are things we learn as children growing up. It's a very autistic experience.

He appears to me as someone who's still developing their conscience and understanding of the world around him. All the puppets are really, all of them taking place in a strange and unsettling world where they are suppose to teach children (who they do not know or see) these valuable life lessons, yet maybe don't know why they're teaching them in the first place? Like, what's the inherent value of learning these lessons anyway? Why are we learning or saying these things? What makes words like "please" or "thank you" matter? Why do we value the things we value at all? It's confusing and absurd.

And I think that's the scary part of all this. Puppets are uncanny creatures, acting as conduits to express our experiences and emotions as people. But what about their experiences? They sit in a morally grey area of existence in the consciousness of our lives, controlled by people to communicate human experiences, but lack agency over their own existence. It's a heavily codependent relationship filled with terrifying implications and allegories, and if this story explores that, it'll be fascinating to experience.

(PS - The quote is from the film The Adventures of Mark Twain (1985) by the iconic Satan himself. It felt too good not to use it!)

[rslashrats]

a dancing banana headcanon i have is that he purposefully makes himself seem older than he actually is to make himself seem more trustworthy and to see less likely to be the one behind the crimes he committed.

think about it. a random banana suddenly popping up as a founder and ceo of a company that has a gameshow and whole entire theme park is a bit suspicious, no? so, what if he just pretends it’s older than it actually is?

giving off the impression his success was something he worked tirelessly for, not sometime that suspiciously sprouted up overnight. editing photos of himself to be black and white to make it look like they were taken before photography in color was as common as it is now. adding details in his backstory of him knowing mark twain and somehow having a bootlegging business, since those happened way in the past, even if the timelines of those two don’t line up?

he obviously made a bunch of mistakes in it, though, leaving in a roblox innovation award from 2023 in one of the photos, and including weird al as also being an equal part of his childhood as mark twain and bootlegging. but still, it seems to have been enough to convince the majority of people in-universe to work. nobody suspects a thing!

… and that’s the way he would like to keep it!