mikeladel

[beloveds-embrace]

part 2 of baker!reader + do not ever ask me to write accents lmao i suck at those 💀😭 and a huge thank you to all the sweet and dessert suggestions! i couldn't add all of them, but oh my god did i love all of them and choosing between them was sooo hard (that's what she said). if your dessert didn't make it here im soo sorry 😭

It was a quiet morning when you finally decided to reopen the bakery. The town had been whispering, speculating about the sudden disappearance of your husband—tragic, they said, to be found mauled by a bear in the woods. You hadn’t shed a tear, hadn’t flinched at the news. Maybe that was cruel of you, but after what you had endured, you couldn’t bring yourself to feel anything for him anymore. Not fear, not sadness—just relief.

And now, with the bakery open once again, you felt lighter. Freer.

The 141 boys were there first thing, as you had hoped. Each one walking into the cozy space like they belonged there. Their heavy, winter boots made the wooden floors creak, their towering frames somehow making the space feel intimate rather than intimidating. You smiled as the familiar smell of fresh bread and sugar lingered in the air, the warmth of the ovens cocooning you and the rest of the bakery in comfort. Free from that terrible man you’d called a husband, it was as if the world itself was taking on a more vibrant color.

“Morning, sweetheart,” John greeted you, his eyes crinkling beneath his hat, though there was something watchful in his gaze.

“Bonnie,” Johnny chirped, leaning on the counter, his eyes sparkling as they usually did when he spoke to you. “Place smells heavenly as always.”

“You’re open today, huh?” Kyle said, grinning as he eyed the display of pastries lined up neatly behind the glass. “Missed our favorite baker, honestly.”

Simon didn’t say anything at first, just gave you a long, steady look from behind his mask. You knew he had seen the signs. He was the only one who had seen the bruises, had taken your hands so gently that day and whispered that promise. You hadn’t asked for it, hadn’t said anything in return, but you had trusted him all the same. You are glad you did. You are so glad it’d been him to see.

Now, as you wiped your hands on your apron and stepped out from behind the counter, your heart was lighter than it had been in months. “Everything’s on the house today,” you said, your smile wider than it had been in ages. “For you guys, at least. After all… I’ve got a few new things for you to try.”

Soap raised an eyebrow, a smirk tugging at his lips. “Is that so? Then we’re in for a treat, eh boys?”

You went back to the counter, pulling out a few trays and plates, your hands moving quickly as you started setting them down in front of the men, watching their eyes light up at the spread. “I’ve been experimenting,” you said, your voice light, almost teasing. “For John, I’ve got pecan pie. Thought you might like it—something a bit rich, a bit warm.” Like you, goes unsaid but you hoped he still heard it.

John’s eyes gleamed as he accepted the slice you placed in front of him. “Always knew you were a mind reader,” he murmured with a chuckle, cutting into the pie and taking a bite. The smile that spread across his face was slow, but appreciative.

“For you, Kyle, lemon meringue tarts. Something sharp, refreshing. A little tangy,” you said, setting the plate in front of him. “And a bit sweet, too. Had a feeling you’d like it!”

Kyle laughed, picking up the tart and admiring it at first. “You know me too well.” He took a bite, his eyes widening at the burst of lemon on his tongue and then groaning in delight. “Perfect, as always.”

Simon watched you closely, and when you placed a plate of apple fritters in front of him, his gaze softened just slightly. “Made these with you in mind,” you said, your voice gentle. “Thought you’d appreciate something classic, Si. Simple, but comforting.”

He didn’t say anything at first, just nodded in that way of his, taking the fritter in his gloved hand. When he took a bite, his eyes closed briefly, and you could see the silent approval in the way his shoulders seemed to relax ever so slightly.

“And for you, Johnny,” you giggled, setting down a small bowl of Cranachan in front of him. “Thought you might like something traditional- whisky, raspberries, oats, and cream. Feels like a bit of home, doesn’t it? At least I hope so. It was my first time making it.”

Johnny beamed all the same, eagerly reaching for a spoon. “Ah, bonnie, you’re spoiling us.”

But it wasn’t just them you were thinking of. You had made a fresh batch of focaccia bread for yourself, but this wasn’t just any bread- it was bold, spiced with rosemary and topped with chilli flakes and garlic. It was a reflection of your own newfound boldness. You’d been quiet, subdued for so long. Now, you wanted to feel alive again.Perhaps it might seem corny, but this focaccia bread meant to signify that for you.

You set a slice of the focaccia on a plate for yourself, taking a bite as you sat with them, your smile not faltering for a second. It was savoury- settling warmth in your stomach. “I think this might be my new favorite, actually.” you said with a soft laugh. In your mind, you were already thinking of making and selling more of it.

They didn’t say much in response, still tasting their own desserts, but you could feel their appreciation, their understanding, in the quiet way they accepted it.

The rest of the bakery was alive with the smell of freshly baked treats: rich brownies, soft sugar cookies, fluffy cronuts, and delicate eclairs. Tres leches cakes sat next to pumpkin pies, while apple and custard empanadas filled the air with their sweet, warm scent. Cheesecakes, cardamom rolls, strawberry lamingtons—the selection was almost overwhelming, but everything sold well. Especially the bear claw pastries. You smiled softly to yourself at the irony. The bearclaw pastries might also be your new favorite, right alongside the focaccia.

Johnny noticed it immediately, the little twitch of your lips, and raised an eyebrow. “What’s so funny, bonnie?”

You waved him off, shaking your head. “Oh, nothing. Just… the bear claws. They’ve been selling really well lately. Thought it was… fitting.”

Simon’s eyes flicked to you, then to the bear claw pastries sitting neatly in a display case. A slow understanding crossed his gaze, but he didn’t say anything. Just a slight nod, the corner of his mouth twitching, the silent acknowledgment of the truth that you all shared. You had no doubt the others knew about it as well- maybe even had a hand in it. Such incredible men.

And for the first time, standing in your bakery, surrounded by warmth and the quiet camaraderie of the men you had come to trust, you felt a sense of peace wash over you. The past was behind you. Now, you had a future to look forward to—one filled with new beginnings, layers to unfold like a mille-feuille crepe cake, and the quiet reassurance that you were no longer alone.

“Here’s to new beginnings,” you said, raising your cup of coffee, your smile bright and genuine.

The boys raised their cups in return, their expressions soft but full of unspoken promises. “To new beginnings,” they echoed, and for the first time in a long time, you believed it. Especially because you could see the way they were looking at you.

masterpost

[kurokawaia]

❛ REPUTATION ❜

YANDERE!Chrollo Lucilfer X Fem!Reader

WC; 900+ | !MDNI! | TW/CW :: chrollo is a yandere here, well he def ats like one, fem!reader, virgin!reader, AGE GAP, gonna say reader is around 18-20 bc she a virgin and a good girl, chrollo is still 26, possessiveness, claiming + more

⋆·˚ ༘ * REQUEST :: (filled request) Hi! Could you please write with yandere Chrollo and virgin female reader(she likes him, but didn’t want to be with him because of his reputation) - ANON

HONEY'S A/NOTE :: I WAS FEELING DIFFERENT DONT MIND THE PINK/PEACH THEME LMAO, lmk if you like it tho 👀

m.list | hxh m.list

You knew this was a mistake the moment you caught his eye.

Chrollo Lucilfer was the type of man who commanded attention. He's dark, unreadable, and dangerous. You'd been warned by friends, by acquaintances, by common sense to steer clear of him. None of them knew that he was the leader of the Phantom troupe, but they could tell that something was up with him.

You, on the other hand, knew very well who he was. He had made it loud and clear that should you ever leave or do anything rash, Chrollo was in a position to threaten you with all he could do. Every time being on duty with him, fear always boiled up inside your stomach.

But the fear that was evident within you, there was just something so irresistible about him, something that couldn't make you stay away no matter how much you did. Chrollo's presence causes your heart to beat in ways that it really shouldn't. You, however, because of his reputation, are to be kept from him.

But standing now in this darkened room, boxed in by his stare, one knew there was no more escaping Chrollo.

Not anymore.

"I know what you're thinking," his voice is like silk. "You're afraid of me, you think you can keep your distance because of what you've heard. But you forget one thing."

He leans in closer, each movement intentional. His dark eyes never left yours, staring with an intensity that would make you want to shrink under his gaze, at the same time you wouldn't be able to look away.

"You want me, too."

Your breath had caught in your throat. How could he know? You'd tried so hard to conceal it, to deny the pull you felt whenever you were near him. It was wrong, all wrong. But his tone made it sound as though you had no say in the matter.

"Chrollo, I... I can't." Your voice less than a whisper. "You're dangerous. I don't want to get involved in. whatever this is. whatever you do."

He reached out, gently brushing a strand of hair from your face, and the touch sent your heart racing even faster. You suck in the air shakily while your lip trembled softly.

"I know that's hard to accept," he whispered, almost softly. "But I've made my decision already. You are mine. "

There was a finality in his words that dropped the bottom of your stomach into a sick feeling. This wasn't a silly love confession, this... this was more like he was claiming you. And much as you tried to deny it, the thought stirred something within you.

"Chrollo, I... I am not." You had managed to stammer out the words while a hot fire had burned in your cheeks.

How would you even explain that you have never been with anybody in your life? That part of you does want him, but the fear of his world and your inexperience holds you back? You have never done a relationship in your life, never kissed anyone, never touched anyone, never had sex.

His fingers tilted your chin up, forcing you to meet his gaze once more. Something... changed in his gaze.

"You're scared of what you don't know," he whispered. "That's okay. I can be patient. But don't you ever think otherwise. I will have you. Every piece of you."

His hand slid down, stroking your jawline, and a chill ran down your body. There was no hesitation in his touch, no doubt in his claim over you. It was terrifying and yet you enjoyed it.

"You can run from me if you want," he said, continuing now in a voice so much lower it terrified you. "But I'll find you. Always get what I want."

Your chest constricted as Chrollo left you no choice. He made it clear no matter what you did, he would find you and when he did. he would take you in every sense of the word.

"I. I don't want to be a part of your world," you finally stammered out, beyond your shaking lips. "I can't."

He chuckled low and it was a shiver you felt run over your skin under his touch. "It doesn't matter. You're already a part of it. The moment I laid eyes on you, it was over. For both of us."

You opened your mouth to protest, but the words died in your throat as he leaned in, his lips caressing the shell of your ear.

"Accept it, love," he whispered. "You can't get away from me. Not now, not ever." "N-" Chrollo cut you off, his lips trailing up your neck, his voice low, humming against your skin. "You don't struggle against me. I'm going to take care of you. No one else can have you now. Can't you see? You're already mine, and nothing you say will change that."

His breathing was hot against your skin, the weakness rising inside you as the fear coiled in your body. But despite that, despite all you knew of him, the fact that he wanted you with such intent sent your heart racing within your chest.

Honestly, could you resist?

He drew back just enough to look into your eyes, a smile playing at the corners of his lips. He knew. Your gaze betrayed your thoughts, and he noticed, of course he fucking noticed.

"You're mine," he leans down, his warm breath dancing across your ear as your hands clench into fists against his black suit, trembling. "And I will make sure you never forget it."

Do not copy, steal, modify, etc. Relogs and like are appreciated.

m.list | hxh m.list

[mysterycitrus]

hi! i' m really loving persephone but i was a little confused about how you're writing jason (and roy). i read through the author's note but i havent read a tonne of earlier comics yet so i just wanted to ask about your characterisation of him? its really different from other fic ibe read

hello! firstly, thank u for the question. i included that chunky list of comics at the beginning of persephone cause i knew how i was writing some of the characters (SPECIFICALLY jason and roy lmao) would be pretty different from popular mainstream interpretations of them. even if most people can acknowledge rhato 2011 was a bad comic these days, it's still (unfortunately) a foundational comic for a lot of jason fans.

the long answer is jason is a very popular character, but because he hasn't had an actual good comic since 2005 a lot has to be filled in to make him a "consistant" character. if u actually analyse any of his modern comics with knowledge of other characters, u would probably notice that: a) 99% of his relationships are stolen from dick grayson wholesale, with no development, b) 99% of what makes him popular was stolen wholesale from characters like selina kyle, helena bertinelli, and stephanie brown, and c) that everything politically interesting about his concept has been watered down to like... a sometimes angry dude who doesn't even use guns anymore.

roy is a separate issue - i truly dont believe most people who identify as royandjason fans have read anything preboot about roy, cause otherwise they'd understand that he would not do any of the things he does in rhato, and he definately wouldn't be besties with his best friends thirteen year old brother.

jason as he exists in fan spaces is a guy who is devoid of nuance, and is basically a reskinned 90s dick grayson stand in. that's not interesting to me. his original conception - the fact that he's from park row, he struggles with violence, he was a fundamentally kind person who isn't anymore because of things outside his control..... that's someone who could engage with batman's legacy in a cool way! a guy with his own moral values who does terrible things but still believes in the inherent value of his personal crusade! when i was writing him, it was important that yes, he can be quippy and fun, but he's also a person who's done a lot of fucked up things, and people aren't going to just roll over and think he's the coolest guy ever cause the writer treats him like a self insert.

the short answer is that im a roy harper fan and i haven't known peace since 2011.

[staybabblingbaby]

Soulmate Garden AU Ch.2 (Anemone) a3d2

[Caution: These are not full fics, or even full parts of fics for some, these are part of my writing progress archive!]

Concept: Growing up, you knew Soulmates weren't all that they cracked up to be. So when, on your 18th birthday, your skin is painted with a garden of flower buds, you resolve to hide it from everyone. Who had ever heard of someone with 8 soulmates, anyway?

Or; Reader has 8 soulmates and no issue avoiding all of them. It's up to SKZ to show her that while every soulbond might not be made of fairy tales, theirs certainly could be.

Word Count: 4,218

Notes: I don't feel like the summary completely matches this story anymore. I'm also not really satisfied with this chapter, but I'm too tired to really get into a whole bunch of drafts and edits, I've just really been feeling poorly lately. The archive is for writing progress anyways, it's fine. I'll probably rewrite this whole chapter if I ever get to where I'd be comfortable posting finished versions to Ao3. I'm also just not fond of my writing style somehow. It feels too formal, doesn't flow enough. Problem is that I really talk like that lmao. Idk, I'll figure it out.

Dividers by @saradika

Warnings: She/Her Reader

Leave me comments or questions or anything! Love hearing from folks <3

Masterlist <3 | Prev Part | Next Part

Bangchan clambered into the van behind Felix, Minho and Jisung loading into the row in front of them. It always felt a bit weird to not spend some time swapping seatmates around based on who was clinging to who at the moment, but on days like today it was easier to just board the vehicles as quick as possible.

He's ended up with a relatively quite combination of their cluster today, and Chan was grateful for it as he settled into his seat with a pained grimace.

He wasn’t sure when it had started, but a persistent on-and-off pain had been roaming around his back for the last twenty minutes as they’d said goodbye to Stays and prepared to leave the venue. He’d be more worried about it, except the sharp, needle-like, pains would settle into a gentler ache before kicking back up again.

As it was, Chan was pretty sure he’d pinched a nerve or strained something and would simply rest when he got back to the hotel. Maybe call up the PT. For now, as three of his soulmates settled in around him, Chan was content to leave it be.

Well, almost. Another twinge of pain makes him wince as he twists to buckle in, and Chan decides that maybe it’d be a good idea to know what he was working with. For comfort’s sake, if nothing else.

“Felix,” He prods the blond next to him, “Can you look at my back for me? I think I pinched something.” He motions toward his lower back, where the majority of the pain had been accumulating.

Felix immediately nods his acceptance, their group’s resident massage expert always willing to lend a hand. Especially if it let him lay hands on his very well built soulmates.

Chan scooches forward and rotates around, balancing with his hand on the headrest of the seat in front of him. He helps Felix shimmy his shirt upwards, struggling with it where it gets caught in the seat-belt.

Chan ends up stuck struggling on his own as Felix chooses that moment to direct his eyes and hands to the afflicted area.

“There’s your first issue,” Felix tuts, “You’ve left your concealment tape on. You’ll give yourself a rash one of these days, hyung.”

Chan gives a sheepish smile from where he’s managed to trap himself in a cloth prison. His head is free, and the shirt his appropriately bunched up over his shoulders and around his neck. Unfortunately, he hadn’t managed to free his hands, so he’s got a bit of a t-Rex thing going on right now. It’s fine.

“I forget it’s there,” he confesses with a whine, “I can’t see my own back, y’know?”

Felix rolls his eyes at their oh-so-glorious leader, carefully peeling the thin material away from Chan’s skin as he scolds, “You still need to take it off. We sweat way too much to not at least change it after a performance.”

He’s bunching up the extra-strength tape to maybe toss at Jisung in the front seat (maybe Minho, if he’s feeling very brave), when he spots something off.

More than half a decade into having found each other, the members of Stray Kids were intimately familiar with each other’s soulmarks. Every drop of color, every line, every curve.

So when Felix looks at the freshly uncovered canvas on Chan’s back, familiar trees, bushes, and rocks painting a forested landscape that describes their impact on their eldest, something new immediately catches his eye.

There, on the fallen log that bridged two banks of a crystal-clear creek, was a moss blanket and a cluster little shelf mushrooms. They added life to the previously defunct object, a little bit of color that couldn’t have been said to be missing until it wasn’t.

The closer Felix looked, the more he saw. A mushroom here, a mossy patch there. Little signs of life and decay that he could have sworn weren’t there the last time he looked.

He looks to Jisung, who’s blissfully unaware.

As the first of their cluster to paint Chan’s skin with color, he was the most familiar with their leader’s mark. Jisung had been too young for his own mark to have appeared when he’d met Chan, but that didn’t stop him from influencing their eldest’s. They all knew he’d spent a lot of time studying Chan’s mark (and Changbin’s when it had appeared, already partially colored in) while waiting for his own.

If there was anyone who’d be more than certain of a change in their soulmarks, it’d be Jisung.

Felix swiftly removes his hands from Chan’s back, earning him a little noise of confusion from the prone man, and reaches over to poke Jisung harshly in the side.

Jisung immediately flinches away from the offending fingers with a loud yelp, attracting the attention of Minho, who’d been peacefully scrolling on his phone. Jisung swiftly fixes Felix with an offended glare, ready to retaliate, but is cut off before he can even try.

“Look at Chan’s mark for me.” Felix demands.

“My mark?” Chan echoes, baffled and alarmed. “What’s wrong with my mark?”

“Nothing, hyung,” Felix assures, “I just need to check I’m not seeing things.”

A series of furtive, silent, and, on Felix’s part, urgent, gestures are exchanged before Jisung finally relents and leans around the back of his seat, grabbing Minho’s for balance as the van departs.

Jisung lazily traces his eyes over Chan’s soulmark. All of Stray Kids had huge marks, but Jisung privately thought that Chan had them all beat. His mark spanned his entire back, not an inch untouched by the image. From shoulder to hip was an oil painting of a mark, filled in from what used to be a desolate landscape to what was now a thriving forest.

Jisung used to think it was so overwhelming to be part of such a mark. To be loved so much, and so deeply. It was evident in every brushstroke of the image on Chan’s skin, and in every action of the man himself.

These days, he found great comfort in it.

He’d gotten so lost in thought as he studied his soulmate’s mark that Jisung had almost missed what had caught Felix’s attention in the first place. But sure enough, his eyes catch on the same log that Felix’s had.

“Oh.” He whispers to himself. “Oh.” He says again, as Minho shoves his head under Jisung’s arm to look himself.

“No, yeah, that’s different.” He confirms, Minho nodding against him, having already spotted it for himself. The two of them find their eyes glued to tiny mushrooms, only sparing a moment to glance at each other before returning their gaze to Chan’s skin, each with their own racing thoughts.

“I thought so.” Felix nods to himself.

“What?” Chan questions, becoming more alarmed by the second, “What’s going on? What’s happened? What’s wrong with my mark?”

Felix lays his palms flat on Chan’s back and begins to rub gentle, soothing, circles. Any changes to a soulmark were stressful at the best of times, and they all knew how much Chan treasured his.

“There’s nothing wrong,” Felix soothes, letting the warmth of Chan’s mark resonating with his touch calm them both as he searches for gentle words.

“It’s just,” He begins hesitantly, “Well, the good news is that you haven’t pinched or strained anything.”

“Good news?” Chan echoes, “Is there bad news?” He lets a nervous giggle fall from his lips even as he relaxes into Felix’s hands.

“Not necessarily?” Felix says uncertainly, “It’s just. Well. Your mark has changed.” He pauses a second and pulls out his phone, quickly snapping a picture and then passing it around so Chan can see. “Something’s been added.”

Felix lets the implication of his words sit untouched in the air as the three of them wait for Chan to process what this means.

Ironically, Chan was the least familiar with his own mark out of all of them. His and Minho’s both resided on their backs so it stood to reason that the two of them didn’t see their marks very often. So it was no surprise that it took Chan several, very long, moments to spot the tiny changes.

When he does, Chan pulls in a deep, stuttering breath. The pain is already fading out to an ache now that it’s been acknowledged and Chan isn’t sure how he feels about the extra confirmation.

He carefully pulls his shirt back down, breaking his soulmate’s line of sight like they hadn’t already burned the image onto their retinas. He doesn’t remove his eyes from Felix’s phone.

“I...” He trails off, “I have another soulmate?” His voice is filled with wonder as he marvels at the picture of his mark. He looks up at the rest of his soulmates currently in the van with awe. “We have another soulmate?”

“Yeah,” Minho whispers, voice choked with emotion, “Yeah it looks like it.”

Felix doesn’t wait for Chan to fully turn around before he’s pulling their leader into a bone-crushing hug, giddy, disbelieving, laughter spilling out of him even as tears prick at his eyes.

“Oh my god!” Felix celebrates quietly as Chan wiggles to return his hug just as tightly. “Oh my god.” The other man agrees.

Even as his soulmates celebrate around him, each feeling their own storm of emotions, Chan can’t quite grasp the reality of the situation.

Stray Kids was a uniquely large soul cluster. From the beginning, when it had become evident that Hannie wasn’t his only soulmate, it had caused issues. Then came Bin, and the rest had followed like dominos. Each time their circle expanded he’d thought “this has to be it, right?” and each time there was a little voice in the back of his mind saying, “No, not yet.”

The issue was that that feeling, that little voice saying ”not yet”, the knowledge that they weren’t complete, had never gone away.

By the time they had all met, none of them could spot anything obviously missing from their marks. All of them were completely colored, lines drawn, images complete. And yet, every one of them felt that hollowness of an incomplete bond.

They’d talked about it a lot. Individually, as a group, in pairs and in quartets and seemingly endless combinations. It was hard, as the years went by, to ignore that nagging feeling.

Chan would always remember Jeongin crawling into his bed in the middle of the night, crying and apologizing for not being enough. Could never forget taking Jisung to a rage room so they could both break down their feelings or drinking with Changbin and wondering if it was wrong for them to be so greedy as to want more when they already had so much.

After so many years, they’d begun to wonder if they were just broken. If they didn’t have another soulmate out there after all, and it was all in their heads.

It had been hard. It was hard.

And now that little blank space in his soul was painted with someone else’s colors and Chan felt whole in a way he wasn’t sure he’d ever experience.

It kind of made him want to cry.

He wanted to cry even more when Felix innocently asks, “So what were they like?” An unmatched eagerness in his eyes as Chan pulled away.

That one guileless question triggers a realization in Chan that has his groaning in despair and slumping forward back onto Felix’s shoulder.

“I don’t know.” Chan mumbles into the shoulder of the slighter man.

“What was that?” Jisung questions from where he and Minho were still turned toward him, obviously as curious as Felix.

“I said I don’t know!” Chan wails, wilting further into Felix’s frame.

“How do you not know?” Minho questions incredulously. Felix gasps as he connects dots he’d been too excited to before.

“I didn’t even know my mark had changed before now,” Chan explains miserably, “I don’t even know exactly when the pain started.”

Jisung sucks in a hiss of air, sympathy splashed across his face. “Oh geeze,” he breathes out, “How many people have we met today alone?”

“Ok, well,” Felix interjects, “Not ideal, but we’ll figure it out!”

Minho turns his incredulous stare onto the optimistic man.

"How are we going to figure it out?" He demands, "Because there were tens of thousands of people in that stadium and I know every single one of us shook dozens of hands tonight."

Felix wilts a little bit even as Jisung comes to his defense, "We kind of have to figure it out, hyung," he points out, "And soon. We're back to Seoul soon."

"Okay but how?" Minho challenges, "And don't give me any 'with the power of love and fate' crap."

"We might have to rely on fate." Chan shrugs, dejected. "It's not like I have a description or anything to give out."

"It'll be okay Channie hyung," Felix pats Chan's back lightly from where they're still entangled together, "It'll have to be."

The van descends into silence as the four of them contemplate their new situation. After a few minutes Chan leverages himself up and out of Felix's embrace to frown aimlessly at his knees.

"Well," Felix breaks the silence, "We don’t have any more shows after this, and we have some days of break time, right?”

“Right,” Chan confirms, “We have tomorrow off and then we’re returning to Seoul to start working on the next album.”

“But officially,” Felix hedges, “We have, like, an entire week off, don’t we?”

“Not quite, but sure,” Chan hesitantly agrees.

“Well, we know they were in town for the concert at least,” Felix continues, “So as long as they didn’t leave the city immediately after, I mean, there's seven more first contacts to go, right?”

“Are you saying we should spend our break wandering around trying for first contacts?” Jisung asks, “Because I’m all for searching for them, but I don’t know that aimless wandering is gonna help.”

Chan holds up his hands to halt that conversation before it could devolve into a bigger debate.

“Let’s shelve that for now, and meet up with the others at the hotel,” He suggests, “We should discuss this as a group anyways.”

He receives a variety of agreements and the four of them settle in for the short remaining drive back to their hotel. He absently hands Felix’s phone back to him and retrieves his own from his pocket to ask the others to meet them in his room.

Chan looks out the window, post-concert fatigue all but a memory. As the buildings pass by, he can’t help but hope that their mystery soulmate was looking for them too.

You reaffirm your decision to never ever meet your soulmates as Taylor loads you into the car, arm wrapped protectively around your shoulder the whole way.

It was one thing when your stupidly large soul cluster was just an idea. Knowledge you held, but unactionable in any way.

It was another when you had evidence, in the form of little white flowers burning with warmth on your skin, that they were real, physical, people.

Even worse when you knew that they were a group of very famous musicians.

You hadn’t actually been sick when you’d texted Taylor, who’d thankfully managed to get all of the autographs he’d wanted before he’d checked his phone to try to find you, but you were getting there. Anxiety had nausea creeping up your throat like molasses.

You’re beyond grateful when your roommate doesn’t question your sudden illness, the both of you well aware that you were hale and hearty when you’d left the house.

Taylor just buckles you in like you’re something precious and fragile and takes the wheel.

The two of you drive in silence the entire way home. It’s not awkward, but you can’t deny the weight of something heavy in the air. The buzz of the concert still lingered between the two of you, and it only made the silence stifling and itchy.

When you pull into your apartment complex neither of you speak for a long moment.

“Sorry for ruining the day.” You murmur to the air in front of you. Taylor just reaches over to pat your thigh and unclip your seatbelt.

“You didn’t ruin anything,” He assures, “Don’t sweat it.” He hesitates a moment before continuing.

“I’m not gonna push,” Taylor begins gently, “But you know you can talk to me, right? Whatever happened, I’m not gonna judge. I just wanna be here for you.”

“What makes you think something happened?” You mutter mulishly. Taylor just gives you a look that has you sinking into your seat.

“It’s nothing. I’m just being dramatic.” You admit. He bumps your shoulder with his and climbs out of the car.

“It’s not nothing if it makes you feel something.” He tells you as he goes. The two of you walk up to the apartment in silence, contemplative this time.

You think about telling him as the two of you separate to wash the concert off of yourselves. You think about it as you take turns using the bathroom and as you make dinner side by side. You think about it as you settle in front of the couch at his feet as his hands automatically pull your head to his knees, his fingers digging into your hair just how you like.

You want to tell him, you decide. You do. It's just that. Well...

Your sister was right, in a way. You’d known Taylor for over a year now, but the two of you didn’t really know much about each other. You really were just roommates.

You didn’t know what his favorite color was. You didn’t know the names of his parents, or if he had any siblings. You barely knew what he did for a living. He’d only ended up your roommate by virtue of you responding to his “roommate wanted” ad with full willingness to be murdered on the spot.

At the same time, the two of you knew everything about each other. You knew how he took his coffee in the morning, that he preferred his eggs dry and over-seasoned. You knew the bands he liked and the games he played. You knew his hobbies better than you knew your own sometimes, and more about his friend’s drama that you ever wanted to.

You know the important things, you think.

You know that every word you tell him in confidence will be clutched tightly all the way to the grave.

“I met my soulmate today.” You confess, your cheek pressed to his knee, half-asleep.

The words somehow feel like they were snatched from the darkest depths of your soul as they spill from your lips. You make no move to take them back.

Taylor’s hand, to his credit, only pauses for a moment. Then he treats your hushed admission like any other comment made while you nod off to dramas the both of you know you only watch for him, resuming the soothing movement of his hand and humming lightly to acknowledge you.

You think it’s that casual treatment that lets you find the courage to continue.

“Well, one of them anyway.” You mumble. Taylor hums his interest, but doesn't take his eyes off of the screen and doesn’t stop petting your hair.

“I don’t want to meet them. There’s so many of them and only one of me, y'know? I don’t even know how to love myself, how am I supposed to love eight other people?” Taylor says nothing still, his eyes glued to an episode of a drama you know the two of you have already finished three times over.

“I’m scared I’ll fuck it up. I’m scared they’ll fuck me up.” Your voice cracks as you breathe life into one of your deepest fears. You realize as you say it that you’ve never voiced these thoughts aloud before, even to yourself.

Tears prick at the back of your eyes when you admit, “I’m not ready for them. I don’t think I can be.”

Taylor finally gives in to the seriousness of the conversation and hauls you bodily up onto the couch. You go willingly, but with rag-doll limpness. He rearranges you to his liking and you find yourself in Gossip Position, sitting criss-cross facing him.

“First of all,” He starts in, his usual levity giving way to a seriousness you rarely see from him, “Don’t be mean to my best friend. I’ll hit you.” You ignore his threat in favor of the warm feeling in chest at hearing him call you his best friend.

Take THAT Ma! No friends your glorious behind.

“Secondly, you are literally the most loving person I have ever met in my life. You would fit the entire world in there if you could,” He pokes your chest, right above your heart, for emphasis, “So I’m not that surprised you have more than one soulmate.”

“I have eight though,” You argue, “Isn’t that weird?”

Taylor just shrugs. “I mean, yeah. But weird is basically your brand, so...” He trails off with a teasing smirk.

You shove him a bit in retaliation, but he just grabs your wrists to still you and continues speaking before you can argue.

“I don’t think eight soulmates is enough for you, honestly,” He muses, “I mean it when I say you’re the most loving person I know. I think you’d even try to take care of Danny if he needed you to.” The mention of Taylor’s very creepy second cousin sends a shiver down both of your spines.

The worst part is that you can’t even argue with him.

“But you know, even with eight soulmates, you don’t have to be with them.” Taylor suddenly switches tracks to reassure you, “They’re your soulmates sure, but you’re your own person. They’re for you, it’s not like they are you. You can live without, if you really want to.”

The two of you let that statement settle for a moment. He’s right, you know all too well. Still, the thought leaves a wad of uncomfortable and complicated feelings lodged in your throat.

After a moment’s pause, you break the silence.

“I have too many years of trauma and not enough therapy money to unpack everything I’m feeling right now.”

Taylor cracks first, and giggles come pouring out of the two of you. The joke wasn’t even funny, but you guessed the two of you had been serious for far too long.

Some minutes later, when the giggles finally die down and you return to watching Taylor’s show, you find yourself with your head on his shoulder.

“Whatever you decide, you know I’m here for you, right?” Taylor quietly picks up where the conversation had left off.

“Sure,” you agree, “Like I was there for you when you cried over a boy I told you wasn’t shit.” You completely deserve the elbow to the side you receive for that comment.

“Shut up, I’m being cheesy!” Taylor scolds with a laugh.

“I’m lactose intolerant!” You complain, but obligingly fall silent.

“Seriously,” Taylor insists, “I’ll be here every step of the way. Whatever you need.”

You wrap your arms around the one of his that you’re leaning on and give a gentle squeeze to show your appreciation. “Thanks Tay.” you murmur.

“Of course. You got me front row tickets to a SKZ concert, we’re ride or die whether you like it for not!” You poke his side to scold him for not being serious after just insisting that you be, but end up having to fight for your life when he immediately retaliates by trying to tickle you.

It takes the two of you quite a while to calm down again, Taylor smug in his victory. He holds your ankles in his lap like trophies of war as you stare at the ceiling. The quiet creeps back in quickly, so you speak.

“I’m just not sure what I want, I think.” You tell him, “I don’t want to meet them. But at the same time, I really do, y’know?”

Taylor nods, “Just let the universe do its thing.” he suggests, “If you’re meant to meet them now, you’ll meet them regardless of what you want. But after you meet them, it’s all up to you.”

You nod along, humming your acceptance of his advice. He’s right, again. You can’t really fight fate, even if you desperately want to. But even within that large restraint, you’re a human being with free will. The world is your oyster and all that.

You let your thoughts fade out and just listen to Taylor yap about the drama on the TV as he finally tunes back into it.

It’s nearly dawn when the two of you decide to turn in, post-concert jitters having deserted you and heavy conversations having taken their toll.

“Did you manage to get their name before you bolted?” Taylor asks out of nowhere as you’re walking to your respective rooms. “Your soulmate’s” He clarifies at your confused look.

“Oh, I didn’t need to.” You answer absentmindedly, already opening your door and dreaming of your cozy sheets. “It was Bangchan.”

You close your door on his gawping face, blissfully unaware of the crisis you’d just sent him into.

Perma Tag List: @Mbioooo0000

[bumblebeesfromvenus]

Lost and Found ♧| 2.

Leon S. Kennedy x reader (ft. my girl Ash)

A/N: This... this took me so long lmao I rewrote it like five times. I'm pretty happy with how it turned out, though! I don't really write slow burn, so this might suck. I wanna apologize for how fucking wonky the events of Part one are???? They're all out of order lmao anyway, Enjoy!

~Fi 🪻

Warnings: swearing, reader is an idiot (lovingly, of course), mention of a small injury, sucky slow burn

Word count: 2.7k

Part 1 ♧ Part 2 ♧ Part 3 ♧

Please don't copy my work! I put a lot of effort and heart into the things I write.

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It had been a couple of months since Spain happened. Your life has definitely... changed. Both good and bad. You were plagued by nightmares frequently, instinctively grasping your arm every time you shot awake. A faint, pink scar had formed where the gash once sat. Tracing it absent mindedly was a common occurrence ever since the first dream. You'd stare at the blank wall in your living room, gently caressing it.

That mission took a toll on you, so you were granted a few months off to work through your night terrors and process everything. Ashley had been a great help with that. She made sure you hung out at least once a week and always stayed in contact, calling you and you calling her. The events of Spain didn't leave Ashley without any struggles either. But, she had assured you that she was save, protected at all times and getting support from professionals. Talking to her, about Spain or anything really, helped you get out of the hole you were in.

She was your best friend. Whether or not she knew it, she really was. You didn't really have friends. Not since Raccoon City. You stayed inside your dull little home the last few years, working a boring office job for the government. Your only friend had been Dave, a middle-aged man who worked in the security department. So you rotted away for years, mourning your past life. Your past you.

Honestly, you have no idea how you ended up as a special agent in the first place. Your police background increased your chances at scoring the position, but you didn't really have much experience. When you were offered the 'promotion', you didn't think too much of it. Couldn't be that hard, could it? You'd survived Raccoon City after all.

You were so wrong. You basically traded the mediocre lunch breaks you had with Dave, with running for your life from Zombies. Bad fucking trade. And the worst part, your officials didn't give a shit. They just wanted this to be dealt with as discretely as possible. End of the story, they underestimated how big this whole thing actually was, and now you were the one left with the shitty consequences. But you had Ashley! And Leon, of course, but that was a little more complicated.

You still hadn't gotten around to the promise of getting drinks together. He was going away on missions all the time, so although you kept in touch no matter what, he wasn't there. You thought, after some excruciating years, you had found your best friend again. Your person. And you did, but he was so close yet so out of reach. You couldn't take it anymore. You lost 7 whole years with him, and you finally had him back, but he was still gone.

"I don't know what to do, Ash." You sighed, playing with your shirt while you held the phone to your ear.

"Well, have you told him that? I'm sure he wants to spend more time with you too, but you need to tell him that!" She urged. Biting your lip, you hestitated.

"I just... he was my best friend. We did everything together, and now.. I know that it's him but I don't recognize him. He's.. different now. I thought he didn't change, but.. he did. That scares me. What scares me even more is the fact that he's always on my mind, I can't seem to function without him here. I only think about him. 24/7." You mumbled into the phone.

"Sounds a whole lot like you're in love with him."

"I- what? No! I mean, of course I love him, he's my best friend, but that's it. He's just my friend and you can love your friends, right? Like, everyone does, it's not something odd or anything." you rambled.

Sure, your heart lit a flame every time he smiled, and the sound of his laugh was heaven. His dumb jokes never failed to put a smile on your face but that's just how friends are. Yes. Totally. Friends feel like that. Just some regular friendly feelings.

"You're so oblivious! That's NOT how friends feel about eachother. Like ever. I've seen the way you look at him!" She argued. "What look? I don't look at him differently... do I?"

"Yes, you do. Everytime he's near you, that lovesick smile on your face kinda gives it away. Or the blush when he asks if you're okay. Not to mention how you panic when he gets hurt. Just admit it!" Ashley whined.

"I'm not in love with him, Ashley! He's my best friend, that's it!" You argued. She groaned into the phone. "I can't believe you're so smart yet so stupid." She said, clearly annoyed. "Rude." you mumbled.

"I have to go now, Miss Denial. Seriously though, you're not doing yourself a favor by denying your feelings." She said softly. You rolled your eyes and huffed.

"Would it make you feel better if I told you I'll think about it?"

"Definitely. Love you!" She beamed.

"Love you too." You chuckled as she hung up. Maybe you would think about it. If not for yourself, then for her. She was right about suppressing your feelings but about you being in love with Leon... you weren't sure.

Eh, that was a problem for the future you. For now, all you wanted to do was enjoy some drinks with him.

Your teeth gnawed at your lip, trying to decided how to go about this situation. Do you call Leon now? Tomorrow, maybe? Should you call him at all? You hadn't talked to eachother in a while... would it be awkward? Before you can lend any more attention to those thoughts, your phone rang and it was none other than Leon. Speak of the devil. You picked up, your heart racing.

"Hey... look, I'm sorry for not calling more, work s'just been busy. I.. Do you want to go for those drinks I promised tonight?" He sounded nervous. Unsure. He sounded so much like the Leon you knew. Your Leon. Maybe he hadn't changed that much after all. "Y-yeah, I'd love that. Um-  how does eight sound?" You responded, a little more nervous than you wanted to. "Sounds good. See you." And with that, he hung up.

Something's up with him. Your brows furrowed. Maybe he worked more to get his mind off Spain? He was a workaholic, trying to do more and more and not realizing how much it actually affected him. He was hurting himself by trying to protect others from harm. Maybe it's just the stress. You had plenty of time to question him at the bar, supported by a few Piña Coladas.

A couple of hours before, the anxiety hit you like a truck. It was safe to say that you were scared out of your mind right now. How the fuck were you supposed to talk to Leon like nothing was going on? Like nothing happened? You couldn't. And after that conversation with Ashley? Nope. No chance. Panic was bubbling up your throat. You felt like you could never face him again. Everytime you looked at him, or even thought of him, it was just pain. The pain of the building collapsing on top of you. Your pained cries when you realized he hadn't come back for you. The pain when you thought he was dead. The pain that if Ashley was right and you really were in love with him, you could lose him again.

He made your world bright and vibrant and when he was ripped from your grasp, you were lost in a sea of grey. Drowning. Desperately gasping for air, refusing to let the water in. Now, he had brought the color back to your life but all the vibrant hues made your head spin and your eyes hurt. You grew comfortable in your sea of grey. Embracing the cold kiss of the water filling your lungs, making you float peacefully.

Could you let the color back into your world? Could you pull yourself from the tide and cough up the water? Did you even want to? You didn't know. It was all too much. You were pulled out of your head when you dropped your glass of water. You were so consumed in your thoughts and anxieties that it had just slipped out of your hand. Carefully cleaning it up, you felt a sharp sting in your finger.

You had accidentally cut yourself on the broken glass shards. A small stream of blood was running down your finger and along your palm. A drop of blood hit the puddle of water, and it bloomed in red. You haven't felt like this in years. You could actually feel something. It's not like you didn't you feel the last seven years, but your soul was too numb to care. You actually felt something. Not like those times when you hit your head or nicked yourself while cooking. You would react relatively neutral to those incidents, but now... you could feel the burn of the cut, a searing sting in your skin. A small smile tugged at your lips.

It's because of him. Because you had him back, and he made you feel alive again. He had just stumbled into your life and turned it upside down. Like he always does. But you wouldn't want to have it any other way. God, how you had missed feeling like this. So vulnerable. So sensitive. So human.

You cleaned up the glass but hung on to the feeling of the cut. You didn't like it per se, but it made you feel like something inside you had been fixed. A missing puzzle piece that slotted right into place. It just felt so right.

Just like he did. You shook your thoughts, having the habit of spiraling, wether it may be good or bad, and continued on with your afternoon. Your nerves about spending time with Leon calmed, it was just Leon! Your best friend. You had nothing to worry about. Well, with Leon, usually there was at least a little something to be worried about.

You were out the door, into the night, on your way to Leon. You had decided to just walk there since parking was an absolute nightmare in this city. Besides, the fresh air in your lungs and cooling breeze on your face was something you hadn't felt in a while. Fumbling with a small box in your pocket, you continued to the bar you two had agreed to meet up at. It wasn't really a present, more something you wanted to return. You never thought you could.

You took a deep breath before stepping into the warmth of the bar. Your eyes were searching for Leon, looking for that familiar blonde head of hair. Spotting him in the back, an inevitable smile crept onto your face. When Leon noticed you, his face lit up, a hand reaching up to signal you over to him. He stood up when you approached and immediately pulled you into a tight hug.

"Hey." He mumbled, muffled by your hair. "Hi." You said, the joy in your voice evident. The first real hug in seven years. You could've melted on the spot. It felt so good. So right.

You reluctantly pulled away, smiling at him. "Wow... It's been a while, huh?" He said with a small laugh. "Yeah.." you responded with a chuckle. You sat down and ordered your drinks. "So.. what have you been up to? How have you been?" You asked. He pondered for a moment. "Not a lot to be honest. Worked a lot, you know, saved the world once or twice." He joked at which you just playfully rolled your eyes.

"What about you?"

"I uh... I adopted a dog. Her name is Lady, she's a Bernese mountain dog. I couldn't stand being alone anymore so I got Lady and yeah... that's about it when it comes to major life events." You laughed, a little nervous but the tension was fading by the minute.

"You gave in, huh? You used to talk my ear off about wanting a dog back then, remember?" He smiled. You did talk about wanting a dog all throughout your time at the police academy and it seemed like you had finally fulfilled that dream.

"Yeah, I did. She's so sweet, you'll love her." you said with a smile. Leon let out a laugh. "I'm more worried about her liking me." He joked.

You two continued to talk and drink, just laughing and having a good time. The night got closer and closer to ending when you remembered the box in your pocket.

"I have something for you." You mumbled, nervous to how he would react. He piped up at that and raised his eyebrows. "Aw, for me?" He teased. You just gave him a shy smile. Now or never. You pulled out the small box and slid it over to him. "I wanted to return this." you said quietly. His brows furrowed and a confused look fell on his face. "Return? Alright."

Leon carefully undid the bow and opened the lid. Not in a million years had he expected this. His jaw hit the fucking floor. It was his goddamn RPD badge. What the fuck? How did you even get this? It was tattered and faded. He gently ran his fingers across his barely legible name.

You chewed on the inside of your cheek. You had no idea how he would react. Leon looked at you completely bewildered. "I.. How?" He asked, still shocked. You shifted in your chair and fiddled with your fingers. "When... when I got out, I found it on the ground. It was the only thing I had left of you." You mumbled, avoiding eye contact. By 'got out' you meant fighting and clawing your way through infected residents and escaping the ruins of the collapsed building.

You could see the pain in his eyes. Whether it was his own for the pain he felt for you, you weren't sure. You spoke before he could. "I made a promise to myself that I would get it back to you one day, but.. at some point, I gave up and just kept it for myself. I thought you were dead and that this," you gestured to the badge," was the only thing I had left of you. My best friend. But it's yours, I want you to have it back." You said, your voice cracking, trying not to cry.

You could see the tears glistening in his eyes, his knuckles turning white as he tightly gripped his badge. "Thank you..." was all he managed to get out. You quickly wiped the tears that were threatening to fall and let out a sad laugh.

"God... I'm sorry for ruining the mood like that. It probably would've burned a hole in my pocket if I kept it any longer, though..."

Leon placed his badge on the table and took your hands in his. "You didn't. Well, a little maybe, but I'm really grateful for this. Thank you." He assured you, sqeezing your hands.  Your skin lit on fire. His touch was so addicting. And so comforting. A blush made its way onto your face. Oh, fuck. Was Ashley right? No. No way, it's just a little hot in here. That's all. But you couldn't deny the way your heart twisted and turned when he touched you, the butterflies in your stomach were having a fucking rave right now. Jesus, it's just Leon. Get it together You thought to yourself.

Shaking off all those annoying feelings, you returned a smile. "How about I make it up to you with a Movie Night, hm? Ice cream and cuddles from Lady included." You proposed. He grinned and leaned in a little closer. "What about cuddles from you?" He asked, a teasing smirk on his face. It didn't come off nearly was confident as he wanted it to. His voice shook a little, making him sound nervous.

Leon Kennedy? Nervous? Something was definitely up. His nervousness didn't stop the bubbling feeling in your stomach, though. There go the butterflies again. Stupid bugs. This is normal, though. Right? You always cuddled. Friends cuddle. No big deal. He's always been like that. No sweat. Just a little friendly cuddle session. That. Is. It. Is it bad that you wanted it to be more than that? The idea of being in love with him suddenly didn't feel as scary anymore.

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Part three is coming soon~

[queercatessays]

For nearly 20 years I didn't realise I had a personality disorder

As a teenager, I knew it wasn't normal to think the entire world was your enemy. I knew it wasn't normal to feel utterly empty inside, to feel like the whole world was behind glass, out of reach. I never knew who I was, or what I wanted. I wanted whatever my favourite person wanted. I existed through others, like a shadow.

I had empathy, but no morals. If it didn't affect me, it didn't matter. I was never violent, but inside I was always angry, so I got good at lying. I'd say for a long time nearly every word out of my mouth was a lie in some way. If I told the truth, it was only to shock people, or to hide something that REALLY made me vulnerable. But normally I was quiet, and because I was quiet, no one really noticed me, till my emptiness became so absolute I finally saw a psychiatrist. You'd think a psychiatrist would immediately recognise the problem. They didn't. I saw 10 experts at the youth mental health center, none of whom could diagnose me with anything. In the end they settled on autism, which is true but not the whole picture. I went on with my life, hating everyone around me, feeling like I must be the only person on earth who feels this way. I felt like an alien, barely human, but at the same time I felt like I was a god, better than everyone around me. I was everything and nothing. I saw counsellor after counsellor for my mental health issues, but they were all terrible listeners, and I was belligerent patient. I never did get any help for my problems, which included all manner of self-destructive behaviour, including eating disorders. But, somehow, over time, through finding people who could accept the mess of a person I am, I was able to heal. I'm not normal, nor will I ever be - or want to be. I still have black and white thinking - friend or enemy, no in-between. I still get suspicious of people and even as I write this I'm full of paranoia (another thing I've had for 20 years), and honestly, I might always feel like an alien. But I'm not alone anymore, and I'm not full of pain 24/7. And it's been a lot easier to deal with all this since I met a friend who happens to have BPD and ASPD. They were talking to me about their experiences, and I tell you now I related to every word. It shocked me, cos I imagined people with personality disorders were violent abusers, which of course I wasn't (despite wishing murder on the entire planet back in the day lmao). The propaganda had got into my head. But when they talked me through things, I realised yeah, I definitely have something. Probably BPD with ASPD traits, or the other way round, but I've not got a diagnosis and honestly, with the way I've been treated, I have no interest in getting one. It's enough for me to be on here reading people's posts and knowing that hey, there are people like me out there. That's why I'm writing this, too. In case someone out there needs to hear it. If you're relating to all these personality disorder posts, then trust yourself. And if you're having an awful time, wondering if there can ever be a way forward, then trust me: there is. I believe in you. My brain is completely and utterly fucked, but I'm still here, and I don't intend on leaving any time soon. All my love to everyone struggling with these stigmatised conditions. We've got this <3

[yanderu-deredere]

bite and chew. (extras)

★ their mate is in the same house and the two of them know they should be talking to him but, instead, they let off a little steam

anon asked: LOL SO LIKE WAS THE REASON MEL SAID THEY WERENT IN THE STATE TO HAVE GUESTS WAS BECOS THEY WERE FUCKING? AND THAT'S WHY LEO HAD THAT BUTT PLUG?

a/n: a little behind the scenes for that lil scene loool hope ur fine with me answering it this way just becos im super ocd about the formatting! this is very all over the place lmao but i just wanted to write it out becos yeah.... im really sorry (:

also before anyone asks THEYRE MARRIED THATS WHY THEY HAVE THE SAME LAST NAME DONT BE WEIRD!

part one (bite.) ★ part two ★ (chew.) ★ extras (taste) ★ part three ★ (swallow.) ★ part four (digest.)

pairing: implied poly werewolves x male reader, isamu lowell x leonard lowell word count: 2690

warning: not much reader in here, leonard is bratty and mean, isamu is just here for the ride, having sex in a semi-public place, kind of exhibitionism? almost exhibitionism? hard to explain but they jerk of right outside of the room reader is in

"Who's the twunk?"

The words leave Leonard's lips before he could stop himself. They always always did and he always beat himself up for it but he had never hated himself for it more than that moment because you were more than a twunk.

You were the most beautiful man he'd ever seen.

You were so stunning.

Mel had always told Leonard that he'd understand once you came, that it would be different with you. Leonard had been the last to join the pack so he didn't know what it felt like but that he'd apparently just know.

He always feared that he wouldn't know, that he'd never feel it, that the feeling would actually just be some sort of irrational jealousy as Mel and Isamu doted over the new addition.

But no, he felt it with you.

Just looking at you, just staring at you, he knew it was you.

The timing was right too. The full moon just started and he was already feeling his blood rushing to his cock at the sight of you standing there, looking at him oddly.

Oddly because he called you a twunk. Fuck.

Mel was saying something. He said your name. Leonard needed to pay attention. He needed to say something, anything. He forced a smile on, trying his best not to look like he wanted to devour you "Nice to meet you too!"

Gods, he wanted to absolutely tear you apart and devour you. In all the best ways, of course.

Leonard couldn't take this anymore. Without thinking (because he never thought on anything first before doing it), he rushed away, desperate for any sort of relief.

"Saaam!"

Their entire cabin was only one floor so, sometimes, getting from point A to point B was frustrating as all Hell but, thankfully, Isamu was where Leonard had last left him.

Leonard burst into the master bedroom, broad grin on his face.

Isamu was completely naked, cock clutched in his fist, sweat trickling down the side of his face and cum dribbling down his shaft. Even though it had been a few minutes since he'd cum, Isamu was still panting like he'd run a marathon.

And, honestly, anyone Leonard rode pretty much always felt that way.

"They're here." Leonard tried to tell Isamu, bright blue eyes wide and that famous wolfish grin on his face "He's here."

Of course, they only ever spoke about one person that way so Isamu immediately knew who Leonard was talking about.

As if he was never tired in the first place, Isamu sat up, eyes wide and a panicked expression on his face "Oh no, what should I do? Fuck!"

Then, he let go of his own cock like the thing was made of molten lava "I-I-I can't meet them looking l-like this!"

"Hmmm," Leonard tapped the bottom of his lip, trying his best to look like he was thinking on it "How about we help each other out?"

Then, he was moving forward and riffling through the nightstand right next to his side of the bed. It was a little hard to find what he was looking for since he wasn't exactly the most organised in the pack but, eventually, his fingers found it and he fished it out.

It was a butt plug that fit perfectly in his hand, all shiny and crystalline, a suitably perfect rosy pink color. At the very head of it was a beautiful blooming flower.

Isamu took one look at it and shook his head "No way."

"What do you mean no way?" Leonard huffed as he tossed it in Isamu's direction. The poor guy barely had any time to catch the thing.

"No way, I'm n-not going to put this in you!" Isamu watched as Leonard started stripping his sweatpants and then his boxers "We're going to end up losing control and then fucking!"

"I need to prep myself, okay? I'm going to get our mate to fuck me tonight." Leonard let Isamu know a-matter-of-factly, smug expression on his face before he was bending himself over in front of his mate.

Isamu sighed, ragged and tired "You don't even know if he's into guys."

"He may not be into guys but he's our mate. He'll be into us." Leonard said it with such confidence that, honestly? Isamu found himself believing him.

It didn't mean that Isamu was any more on board with Leonard's stupid bullshit, though. But, he knew all the time spent arguing with Leonard was wasted time.

So, he grabbed the lube next to the bed on the floor and warmed it up on his fingers. Leonard always complained when it was too cold and he didn't want him to complain when he was already stepping on Isamu's nerves.

"Fuuuck, Sam, your fingers are always the best." Leonard groaned a little when Isamu finally started pushing his fingers in, the lube making the insertion smooth and easy.

Mel's fingers were always the hardest to take because they were always so rough and thick. Perks of being a lumberjack, Leonard supposed. But Isamu's fingers were long and lithe; they always seemed to get to the places in Leonard that nobody else could.

"Shit. RIght there, baby, fuck." Leonard buried his face into his arms as the tips of Isamu's fingers brushed against something inside him that made his cock twitch.

Isamu hated that Leonard was enjoying this so much. So, as a little bit of retaliation, he couldn't help but give his ass cheek a little bit of a spank with his free hand.

Leonard was the best to spank out of the three of them. Unlike Mel and Isamu, Leonard had pale skin so, when they hit and bruised him, his skin always turned such pretty vibrant colours.

And he cried so pretty too.

"Fuck, shit, sorry." Leonard's hips did a little aborted thrust like they didn't know whether to grind his cock against the mattress for relief or to push hard against Isamu for more "Shit, Isamuu."

Both of them knew the apology was bullshit but Isamu took it anyway and rubbed a comforting palm against the stinging ass cheek.

It didn't stop him from tapping it again once, twice, thrice, each time harder than the last, trying to remind Leonard that this entire thing really was inconveniencing him just a little bit.

Leonard sobbed each time, the apologies disappearing, replaced with that bratty attitude of his that always demanded things.

"Fucking stop! Shit! Fuck!" He'd curse but he wouldn't pull away, wouldn't actually stop Isamu, would just keep letting his mate fuck his fingers into his ass.

"Okay, shit, I've had enough!" Finally, Leonard pushed his hand back and clawed at Isamu's leg, teeth bared "Push the fucking plug in me or I might push you down and fuck you."

Isamu gulped and nodded a little haltingly. Yeah, this was exactly what he was worried about.

He took his hand off of Leonard's ass cheek to grab the butt plug only to realise that it was cold. So, he put the whole thing in his mouth, saliva coating it and dribbling down the corner of his mouth.

Of course, Leonard watched and he couldn't help but think how erotic Isamu looked taking the thing and licking at it.

It made him want to fuck him even more. Which, of course, made him groan and grind his cock into the rough sheets under him.

"Calm down." Isamu grumbled and took his fingers out of Leonard's ass before finally coating the butt plug with lube and slipping the whole thing into Leonard's ass.

It was mesmerising to watch it slip so easily in and to see the excess lube dribble out.

It was even more unbelievable to watch Leonard get up like nothing ever happened. He didn't even hobble as he angrily cleaned himself up and got dressed.

"Wait! Fuck," Isamu grabbed his pant leg "You said you'd help me out!"

Leonard laughed, all mean-spirited before kneeling beside the bed.

Without even hesitating, he took Isamu's cock into his hand and licked a long stripe, from the base to the tip, before taking the tip into his mouth and suckling on it.

Isamu's head fell back, a strangled moan leaving his throat. "Y-You're not helping!"

Leonard laughed again, lips vibrating around Isamu's tip and causing his hips to jerk up into Leonard's mouth.

In response, Leonard gave a couple of taps on Isamu's hip. Calm down.

"S-Sorry, just-- Fuck, don't-- don't laugh with my p-p-penis in your mouth." Isamu stuttered out, his hand darting out to cup the back of Leonard's neck.

Leonard already knew that but that didn't mean he wouldn't do it. It was always fun to see Isamu freaking out about it, after all.

Still, as an apology, Leonard smoothly took the rest of Isamu's cock down his throat, monster length and all. The slurp of cum, lube and saliva was absolutely obscene.

At least, Isamu thought so as he let the rest of his body fall back, his hand tightening around the back of Leonard's neck, his hips struggling to hold back on fucking the poor guy's throat.

"Fuck, fuck, Leo, fuck."

As suddenly as he did it, though, he was pulling back, slowly sucking and licking as he took out inch after inch. Isamu watched with bated breath as the bulge in Leonard's throat seemed to shift before disappearing completely.

Leonard would kill him one of these days.

"There, all clean." The monster croaked out before clearing his throat and licking his lips like he'd finished a popsicle and not absolutely deepthroated Isamu's cock.

Then, to make matters even worse, Leonard took Isamu by the wrist and cleaned the cum off his hand, his tongue working in between his fingers and lapping at his palm.

"Leo!" Isamu let out another strangled moan, his hips helplessly thrusting into nothing and his cock feebly bobbing around.

"Come on, our mate is literally on the other side of this damn house!" Leonard stood up, dusting himself off before throwing clothes at Isamu, uncaring when they hit him in the face instead of landing on his lap.

Isamu just sighed and obediently put them on, knowing full well that, when Leonard got like this, it was better to let him boss you around than to argue.

That and Isamu was excited too, after all.

Isamu knew the happiness that came with finding another mate. Just finding Mel was a miracle in itself.

He hadn't known that his... condition had been so... trainable and Mel helped him out. To think that they became mates too? It was like fate brought them together.

And then Mother Moon brought them Leonard? It was more than Isamu could ever ask for.

Now, she gave him another gift with you.

So, yes, Isamu nervously followed Leonard, scared out of his mind to see you but also happy and excited and all of these emotions brewing inside of his chest.

And when he saw you? When he looked at you, sitting there at the table, looking at him with those eyes, that handsome sweet smile on your face? He knew, just like how he knew when he saw Mel and when he saw Leonard, that you were his.

"Hello." He wheezed out, unable to really think of anything more intelligent to say.

Especially when you smiled at him like that so brilliantly, like the Sun itself "Hello! You must be Sam, right? Nice to meet you!"

"Isamu." He corrected before realising how stupid that sounded "Y-You can call me Sam."

Then, to make it even worse, like his body wanted to embarrass him, he bowed. He really didn't mean to do it but his body was moving before he could stop himself.

Thoroughly embarrassed (and his cock still hard from both what Leonard had done before and from just seeing you), he scurried away.

"Sam!" He heard Leonard follow after him but he was near tears, knowing that you probably thought he was some stupid idiot or something.

When he showed no signs of stopping, Leonard wrapped his arms around Isamu's waist and tried to pull him to a stop.

Of course, Leonard was no match for someone so buff and tough like Isamu. But, out of respect for Leonard or because he liked doting on him, Isamu almost immediately stopped.

Just as the two of them paused almost right outside the kitchen, they heard your voice, melodic and sweet.

"What's up with all of you and your partners looking supernaturally good-looking?"

Isamu felt his cheeks and his ears grow hot. You didn't think he was some weirdo for being so flustered and embarrassed in front of you?

Leonard sighed and Isamu felt his breath against his ear.

"See, you're fine. You're panicking without thinking again." Leonard whispered against Isamu's ear, his lips tickling the shell of it "Just calm down."

Then, Isamu felt Leonard smirk "Let me help you calm down."

Without warning, Leonard's hand snuck into Isamu's sweatpants and into his boxers, his fingers wrapping around his still hard cock and pulling it out.

There was no lube, of course, and no cum to help so Leonard huffed "Spit."

"W-We-We're right outside--" Isamu tried to protest.

"I said spit." Leonard huffed out again and, knowing Leonard, Isamu just did as he was told, letting a line of his spit drop onto his own cock.

Leonard laughed rather meanly before spreading the spit all over the shaft of Isamu's cock. It still wasn't enough, of course, but it definitely helped.

"Gods, I bet if our mate saw you now..." Leonard let himself trail off and Isamu's hips helplessly jerked forward at the thought.

What, you'd think Isamu was pathetic? That he was disgusting for being turned on just looking at you? That he shouldn't be leaking so much pre-cum while he was being jerked off right outside the room you were in?

Isamu immediately pulled his hand up to his face and bit down on the back of his wrist, trying his hardest not to let out all the pitiful moans and whines he wanted to.

Leonard let out a couple of breathy chuckles as he continued to work Isamu's cock "You're getting off on it, aren't you? I bet you'd really cum hard if he came out and saw you."

Isamu shook his head but the two of them knew he was just denying the truth.

"Listen to his voice while you get off, you pervert." Leonard's free hand suddenly came up to pinch Isamu's face, his thumb and fingers digging into his cheeks.

"Yeah, my girlfriend invited me but then ditched me to go hang out with some buff guy."

"Girlfriend? Ha, you're getting off to a guy with a girlfriend, 'Samu." Leonard jeered, fist clenching a bit harder around Isamu's cock as he did a particularly rough jerk. "What are you going to do about that, Isamu? Our mate has a girlfriend."

Oh no, oh no. The worst part about Leonard was that he knew exactly what buttons to press and he knew exactly how easily Isamu got jealous over his mates.

He didn't even know who your girlfriend was but, Gods, did he want to rip out her throat with his bare teeth.

Isamu's teeth tightened around his own wrist and he futilely fucked into Leonard's fist, trying to chase the high that he felt coiling into his stomach.

Isamu wanted to claim you, wanted to take you away from your girlfriend. She didn't deserve you anyway. Only they did. Only they deserved you, you could only belong to them.

When Isamu came, his entire body bent forwards and he could barely muffle the huffed out moan that left his throat. Leonard himself laughed up a storm and had to cover his mouth.

The cum, of course, splattered all over the floor and Leonard knew he'd have to clean that up.

Isamu was absolutely out of it, his entire body sagging and tired as he panted and groaned.

"Sam, Leo, come here and hang out with our new guest!"

Or they could probably clean it up later.

[minthara]

really long personal answer to an anon i got. trigger warnings in the tags.

First of all i wanna apologise to everyone who follows me for the last few days lmao, but i feel like if i dont post about it im literally gonna kill myself. I need somewhere to write down my thoughts because i feel bad always going to the same 2 friends i still have and complain about the same situation again and again about a dude they dont even know that well.

Thank you so much for ur message really, and sorry if im gonna take it as another excuse to write down all my thoughts, but i think it will really help me.

So the pathetic thing. I didnt ever post about this and in real life i think only like. 3 people knew. But after we broke up i begged him for months to take me back. It really was pathetic. And when he called me pathetic i think he was just very very hurt, because that was the second time i broke up with him (just a few weeks ago). It was in the sense of me begging him for so long just to break up again a few months later. I feel fucking stupid even writing this. I spent about 10k euros trying to get away from him, it fucked up my life so massively that i lost a job i really loved over it.

And now my new job is about 5 minutes away from our old apartment and i think thats a huge reason why i cant get over it. Every day i walk past restaurants, the supermarkets, anything we went to together. I had to buy snacks for work today and just burst into tears in the fucking supermarket because we used to go there together. The people at work are always so appreciative bc i know the area so well but they dont know how much it fucking hurts me and its so stupid like. Should i just avoid that part of town forever??? No fucking get over it bitch like wtf its a fucking supermarket.

And it also hurts because i know i wasnt always perfect and there were many times i was super mean to him. But at a point i couldnt deal with his ADHD anymore and that sounds so shitty but im a super organised person to the point where sometimes i wonder if thers anything ocd related but i dont think so. In my head i swap between i have ocd, i have adhd, i have borderline, i have autism  - i have no idea whats wrong with me, but the way i feel cant be normal. I know this because the way i behave isnt normal, i know i can come across as really strange, i cant judge social situations well and often dont know how to behave. But i constantly criticised him for symptoms of his mental illnesss.

But i never physically hurt him, and that was the last straw for me, why i left. I dont know how u can do that to a person you love.

And im just mourning the life i thought i was going to have so, so, so much. I know on tumblr ppl somehow think youre brainwashed when you want a traditional marriage and kids and stuff, but i really thought that was going to happen in the next 2 / 3 years, thats how i planned my life since i was fucking 21 and i met him. And now im almost 27, and i cant even go on dates because i cannot bear talking to new people because all i want is a clone of him but better.

I know i will look back at this and think “u cried about THAT guy???” in a few years, because thats how its always been in my life lol (except for one relationship, but were still really really best friends). I always think afterwards i will never love someone that much again. But it hits so much harder because it was such a serious relationship lol i really wanted to marry him. Sobs lol.

[evilvvithin]

hey, i wanted to ask if you could maybe write like a könig fluff whith a genderneutral reader that is stressed out because of their teammates making fun of them and then könig like comforts them and yea thats it basically :>

okay you said teammates and the first thing that came to my mind was playing games and your game teammates are making fun of you cause you’re stuck in a bad loop of dying LMAO anyway here it is <;3 contains task force 141 members and fluff (1,221 drabble)

  Today. 

  It’s the day. 

  Your day. 

  Important day in your life where you can finally prove you are worthy enough to join the rest of the team on the missions outside. 

  “Need some help? Can you even carry that?” Soap laughed while walking by you. “It’s almost bigger than you come on!”

  You started to laugh together with him, but deep inside you didn’t find it funny. Not anymore. Him and others were constantly making fun of you to the point it was starting to sit deep in your mind, giving you doubtful thoughts that they might be right. The sniper wasn’t bigger, not heavy, yet they always found anything to poke into you. ‘I probably caused it all myself’, you thought to yourself. Joking together with them and joining them in all their jokes at beginning gave them the confidence that it’s all fine with you to tilt you like that. 

  You were laughing, but clenching your jaw at the same time. ‘How do I tell them to fucking stop?’ You were going to show them to not make fun of you anymore. This mission. Finishing packing up your sniper rifle, you grabbed the hood and gear to dress up. 

  Ghost and Price already entered the room some time ago, now all of them staring at you as you unbuttoned your uniform without any deeper thoughts about it. You didn’t notice their stares at all. 

  “Ehm,” König cleared his throat loudly and leaned at the door frame, staring all 3 of them down from behind his sniper hood. 

  They were friends, well, they knew each other well throughout the years of their groups cooperating but you still felt the tension in the air when König entered the room. Everyone was always staring at him, he was a behemoth of a man and naturally had respect because of that. Always wearing his hood at work, no one ever knew what he thought about or what his face looked like or what his emotions were at all. 

  You had to smile at the scene in your head, you knew König well. He wouldn’t hurt a fly, unless you stood on the opposite side of his friend list. Unless you were his enemy. He was very careful about who he opened to, choosing his inner circle very carefully. Ghost , Price and Soap were one of the few who grew onto him. He’d die for them and they knew it, they’d do the same and yet they couldn’t help but hold their breath when they saw König piercing their eyes through theirs.

  “We were…” Soap started and coughed. 

  “We were just leaving,” Ghost replied instead of him with a completely uninterested monotone  tone of voice. “We have our own gear to prepare.” Giving a hand gesture, both Price and Soap followed him out of the room. 

  You didn’t notice, but you were standing there the whole time with a half unbuttoned uniform just staring at them all blankly. “Give me a sec,” you quickly whispered and removed it, placing heavy outdoor gear instead of the uniform.

  “Don’t worry about them,” he said and walked towards you. 

  “Worry? Why would I?” 

  He handed you a belt with handguns attached to it. “I notice you aren’t comfortable around them. Especially Soap.” 

  Placing the belt around your waist, you sighed. You worked with König for years. You felt like you knew him completely and he opened up to you even, at the same time you felt like you knew nothing about him at all. 

  ‘Should I share my stupid thoughts with him?’ König’s eyes were locked on you, waiting for a reply. You knew this was one of the moments he would not just leave without some.

  “They are funny guys,” you said after a while. König chuckled at your words and nodded. “They’re great friends and you can always count on them. They always make you laugh, you know? I was joining them in the jokes, supporting the fun and such…” you exhaled deeply.

  König tilted his head slowly. “But?”

  “It’s too much now. It’s just…”

  To your surprise, he stepped towards you and pulled you into a tight hug. Your nose buried deep inside his vest you almost couldn’t breathe. 

  “They're overdoing it,” he said. 

  ‘Mmhmmm.’

  Your mind was empty, you didn’t expect a random hug from him at all. You felt yourself melting into the warmth of his body escaping through the fabric. 

  “I kinda got myself into it, just…” 

  König brushed his hand down your hair slightly, almost like he hesitated to do so. “You are the last person to blame.” 

  “I kept going on and kept joining the fun, I can’t just suddenly go and say it’s not fun from now on?” You said.

 “Who says you can’t?” 

  His voice was so calming, feeling the vest softly rise and fall as he breathed slowly was even more calming. You felt all the annoyance and anxiety leave your body. He was right, you weren’t obligated to continue the jokes if you didn’t find them funny. ‘But how do I tell them?’

  “Ich bin immer für dich da,” he said almost silently. “I’ll take care of it, okay? You finish your preparations.” With those words, he let go of you and headed towards the door. “Not like you need any, you’ll kick ass!”

  You waved at him to go and smiled widely. You were sure he had just as wide smile under his hood as yours. ‘How could I’ve been so lucky to get in his “inner circle”?’ The stupid smile wasn’t leaving your face for a long time yet. Inner circle… You knew whatever König said he’d do. Saying he’d take care of them making fun of you, you almost felt sorry for them but at the same time you felt a nice warm feeling deep inside. 

  König always cared for you, more than the others, but you didn’t really think about it much till now. Squeezing your thighs together from all the thoughts fighting over each other in your head, you checked if your belt fits perfectly. Noticing something stuck underneath it, you reached for it and found a bullet. Hollow one. Before you could inspect it more, the bottom of the bullet fell off and a tiny piece of paper landed in your lap. 

  “Ich bin immer für dich da,” you read the words on it out loud and smiled. 

[sniigura-archive]

I’m pointing at that anon and laugh lmao

Seriously, I knew that the hazbin fandom has some weirdo chronically on twitter dickheads with no media literacy but that shit is on another level.

People should have fun and the least you can do is respect them and leave them alone if they don’t hurt anybody.

Everyone on that shit ass dc server deserves a punch in the face by me 💕 Nobody disrespects my bby 💕

people are so serious these days like i write self insert porn and i can tell you who’s enjoying their life more between me and the anti anon 😭😭

idc about the server anymore, i lurked a bit and it’s mostly like teens and only one person who said that in there and it’s not like i take stuff like that laying down 😭 don’t join the server to cause drama or anything go in there to enjoy ur time genuinely. the good thing is i got confirmation for the age of someone who interacted with me a lot and it’s a minor </3 (and my number one hater/j) so i blocked since this is porn i post and i rather have not children interact with that for my own comfort sake

anyways thank you to everyone coming to my defence those were very stressful 20 minutes of my life i can’t deny that. if this blog ever disappears you will still find me on ao3

[0wl3tt3]

Reflection on my practice (for future me)

Hello, so I wanted to do write what has been my practice so far for future me to read and reflect, I discover a lot for myself, so this might be long so please sit and relax.

Catholicism

I grew up Roman Catholic for most of my life, living and breathing on those values, going to Catholic school and going to church but it doesn't really have an affect for me, I didn't feel connected to Catholicism, so I was semi atheist (I didn't know that Agnostic exist) for most of my early teenage years until I was in grade 10, where I was kinda chilling in class, I wasn't interested with the subject so I just pulled out my phone and thought it would be fun to search on tumblr about witchcraft and it really interested me. Everything about it looked fun and maybe I wanted to dipped my toes in the water. Later on I created an account specifically for that! I enjoyed it as a newbie liking the vibes and looked to find Paganism

Kemeticism

Anyone who followed 15-16 year old me will remember I was a Kemetic pagan, I worshipped Anubis and Ra (Along with Heru-Sa-Aset) but I was close to Anubis, I prayed to him after my dog died which did started my path to paganism where I now just denounce myself silently as a Catholic. I prayed and gave him offerings that I have access to and just let him guide me to cope. I started being open to my practice to my friends as well which they all really support! I never said anything to my family knowing what they believe was that I'm just catholic.

I really do thank Anubis and the gods I did pray for those hardships of my own mistakes and leading me to comfort even when I'm arrogant. It inspired me to admire history more that I ever did, I wanted to read more about old religions, I wanted to just eat every single information I can find tiring to be the best version of what I should do and value.

Hellenism and Athena

I've already told this but I wasn't Kemetic pagan anymore now, I adored Anubis but it felt like my time of mourning had passed and it felt like I might have to part my ways with Kemeticism. Its a beautiful religion and the people there are lovely! but I just don't follow it as a follower anymore and I was called to Hellenism.

I wasn't gonna lie and say Hellenism didn't intimidate me, it did, I knew to never take the myths literally for me to not act dumb but there were a lot of things I had to learn now that I wasn't following Kemeticism. I wasn't sure who to look, well, for a bit until I settled with Athena which makes sense.

Listen, I am a girl that loved the greek monsters, dragons, drawing, and war history, of course I'm gonna pray to Athena!

I felt like she was the goddess for me and later became the kinda the only goddess I prayed for when it comes to tests and being strong. Sometimes I don't do prayers because of school and my own laziness, I'm happy that she's patient with me and a tarot reading by a friend, where I asked "What's Athena thinking about me? I haven't done much for her..." "Talk to me more! and stop procrastinating!"

Is just... I STILL THINK ABOUT IT LIKE OH SWEET GODDESS THANK YOU BUT ALSO DON'T CALL ME OUT😭😭😭😭/j

But I really do thank her for that, it's just so sweet for me to know she is around even when I'm not always acknowledging her.

Now and future

I think one, buy a fucking tarot deck for myself and just talk more, sometimes when no one is around I just talk out of no where to her which I see as my baby steps to coming back since last and the early months I was pretty dry on my worship and practice. This summer I hope I can read history books and just talk about it to her, start doing divination and do something about that rain water from one year ago lmao.

I think this year will be witchy and pagan for me! I'm excited for shenanigans to ensue with my irl witch friends!

And I will say it again, thank you to the deities I worshipped before and now for guiding me to where I am now, no matter how chaotic it is, you're there for me.

So for future me, let's do this!!!!!

[phoenixfangs]

tagged by @rizaposting HOLDING UR HAND AND PRESSING MY FOREHEAD AGAINST UR SHOULDER i never get tagged in these so this is fun huehue

are you named after anyone? not technically, ive asked my parents multiple times about How they came up with me and my siblings names, but they just. didnt think very hard about it. fjkdlsjfdlas. but in a way im named after my mom, because me and saturns given names start with the same letter as our moms; my younger siblings names start with the same letter as our dads. i guess me and saturn could also be named for one of my dads uncles?? our names mixed make that uncles name. but idk im not willing to believe my dad cares that much about Anyone in his family to honor their memory through our names lawl

when was the last time you cried? i think the other day watching atla, when zuko and iroh reunite before the final battle. zuko trying to stumble through an apology and thinking iroh must hate him, but iroh just without even saying anything grabbing zuko and pulling him into a tight and tearful hug... man ;_;

do you have kids? HELL NO!!!!! im barely halfway through my 20s i should be at the club. dont want kids, never wanted kids, will never want kids. i will tolerate being my nieces and nephews cool auncle when my siblings start having kids of their own, and No More, thanks

do you use sarcasm a lot? i guess so?? its hard to gauge. i feel like most of the time i speak sincerely, but i will also throw in the occasional sarcastic quip. shrugs

what sports do you play? i dont play any sports anymore, but up until high school i played softball. i was pretty good i think! pitcher and second base. also in middle/high school i was a baton twirler for band and i guess dance competitions (i have Never thought of it as 'dance' but i guess technically i was dancing... blegh), and im gonna count that as a sport. any activity with the possibility and probability of being hit on the head by a metal rod counts as a sport to me

what’s the first thing you notice about people? probably their height. most people are taller than me but i will make an immediate note of people who are Shorter than me

what’s your eye color? grrrreen gray? i spent a few minutes staring at my eyes trying to figure out the color but all i did was strain my eyes jfldks

scary movies or happy endings? hmmmmmm i love both. i like blood and gore and guts and evil, but i also like heartwarming fluff where everything works out. i cant decide!! it just depends on my mood hehe

any special talents? i hesitate to claim i have perfect pitch because it sounds self congratulatory, but im pretty sure i have perfect pitch lmao. i cant Identify notes by name but i can recreate pretty much any note i hear, as long as its in my range. im not a good singer though lawl i dont have the technique. in the same vein, i can recreate other noises i hear pretty well, like i taught myself how to do the perry the platypus clicking sound Thing he does just by listening to it

where were you born? texas born and raised! everyone i knew growing up was a redneck or a 'cowboy church' christian

what are your hobbies? drawing, writing fanfic oneshots or rps with friends, bideo games, rewatching the same handful of tv shows and letsplays and video essays over and over again

do you have any pets? my son, my sweet bubby, apollo :> my stupid little man, hes gonna be 3 this year i think! flame point siamese kitty, dumb as rocks, currently i think hes burrowed in the sheets on my bed taking a nappy

how tall are you? 5'2", but add a couple inches because i almost exclusively wear shoes that add height, like my Big Dyke Boots i wear every day hehe

favorite subject in school? any of my electives probably, like art and music/band. in college my favorite classes i ever took were film appreciation, screenwriting, and theatre directing (which i signed up for thinking it was film directing, but it was still so fun and interesting)

dream job? honestly?? i think anything on the set of a movie or tv show would be awesome. maybe creative consultant, so that i can interject my own ideas into other peoples projects. i tend to feel my most creative when im working Around other peoples ideas tbh. all that, or lead writer/director on my own tv show/movie/video game, if i ever feel like i can handle that pressure

GET TAGGED @applescabs @lizardyeast @cottagegay and anyone else that sees and wants to participate :>

[autumn-foxfire]

I'm up to episode 61 so I think it's time to watch the first movie for the series. I know they're technically not canon but I still want to watch them in a way that sort of matches the series.

I could have probably watched it sooner but I kind of got a bit too hooked on watching the series when I could XD

Isn't Conan known as Shinichi's cousin in later chapters? In fact it's Yukiko who calls him that, right? Makes sense why this movie has it so Shinichi "doesn't know" Conan and Shinichi has to pretend he's just remembered his name.

There is something to be said that Shinichi picks Ran's favourite colour because he knew it was her favourite instead of actually picking a colour that would make him happy like she intended. It's such a small lie but it's one that really does give us more insight into their relationship (yes, yes I know this is non-canon but still the non-canon movies still make there relationship dubious because that's how it's depicted in canon).

Also, she also picked a movie that is clearly something for her, for Shinichi's birthday. That would be like me picking a horror movie to watch for my boyfriend's birthday even though he doesn't like them but I love them. It's inconsiderate. These are such basic romantic gestures and even the writing team can't get them right.

Maybe you wouldn't have to worry about turning Ran down if you had just told her the truth and then you two could have gone together without all the goddamn hiding but nooooooo.

Shinichi, that probably wasn't the best way to tell kids they were playing with a bomb but I get it, you were panicked.

One of the many times being Conan has actually helped him with criminals, everyone underestimates him as a child.

Awww, Shinichi caring about the property he stole even though he did it for good, what a good boy. Shinichi you also haven't done anything good for your rep by letting "Conan" handle the bombs XD

I do love how protective the movies make Kogoro of Conan. Even if he's also still pretty arrogant about it.

LMAO I forgot the Detective Boys just keep getting near the bombs by complete accident.

Sonoko, please go, you'd be a better date for Ran than Shinichi will ever be.

The train bombs is such a good moment in the movie. Just the tenseness of them not knowing if Shinichi is right as they divert the trains. How all the employees conducts themselves to help and the relief and celebration when they succeed. It just's really good. It's something the movies do really well.

The fact that Kogoro is actually on the right track but came to the wrong conclusion T-T

That poster art looked really, really bad. Ran are you sure you want to see this movie. Maybe it's a good thing the building gets blown up.

Symmetry is overrated-

As an artist, I totally understand the urge to get rid of old work you don't want anyone to see anymore, so mood. I too, would blow up a building to get rid of them.

Don't you just hate it when your detonator has no batteries because a gremlin stole them?

Megure treating Shiratori as his pokemon: "Shiratori attack!"

Ran's dead. I'm sorry, she got crushed. There goes Shinichi's love interest.

They really just let Shinichi run off with the bomb schematics, didn't they T-T

Yes, Ran, Shinichi is incredibly unreliable to you and doesn't trust you so WHY DO YOU LIKE HIM?!

Ran, it has a clock on it, what do you fucking think it is?! Shinichi did not have to tell you that. Come on girl, you're both "in love" with and live with a detective, you can't be this dumb.

Sorry that was mean, she is in a tense situation. I apologise Ran, that was unnecessary.

Shinichi don't call her an idiot! SHE'S DISARMING A BOMB. Yes I do realise I am a hypocrite.

It's a good thing Ran is a hopeless romantic that Shinichi does not deserve at all.

There's no red thread because you two are terrible for each other <3

[savedpeople]

thoughts on the dead city finale:

sucks that ginny finally tried to talk and didn’t get to

everything i didn’t want to happen, happened lol. it’s revealed that ginny’s dad was one of the five men negan killed, and negan told her this to push her away and get her to go with armstrong, and now their relationship is likely strained if not ruined. she didn’t even want to wear his shirt anymore :( but you can also tell it hurt him to tell her and that he actually cares about her more than he says (confirmed bts later.) it also bugs me bc in ginny’s eyes this most likely confirmed maggie’s “he’s a monster” from last episode

and then i was unfortunately right, in that the dama wanted negan to... lead? help her lead? honestly it’s bizarre that she decided she needed him THAT badly and making him THAT important solely based on the croat’s fanboying, without ever meeting him. and now negan’s being forced into a position where he’ll likely have to be “old negan” again. 

“like mommy and daddy coming together”

i’m glad the croat’s still around i kinda like him lmao

BUT. it’s complete bs that the answer to “how did the croat know about negan and maggie’s history” is “he randomly ran into Jerome The Random Savior (i checked and this is not someone who was seen previously in the saviors, not even as a background character) over ten years later, and jerome told him about the story of The Widow, because for some reason, out of everything negan did, maggie’s story is the only story anyone from the savior era ever talks about.” still doesn’t explain how the croat knew what maggie looked like or managed to find her new community, or how he knows negan worked with her in season 11, since jerome was long gone by then. I really hate “characters absent during important events know intimate details about those events because random character the audience never met told them about it off-screen bc the plot needs it” stuff

negan indirectly/accidentally killing luther ended up having no consequences and was never found out since everyone in luther’s group died. all it did was distract maggie from telling negan about ginny’s dino... which she ended up never telling him about. he realized she wasn’t being truthful about things but the fact that she hid the dino never comes up.

negan got stabbed in the chest/shoulder?? and he just pulled the knife out and there was no blood or tear in his jacket? dude was just entirely unaffected lol

negan also confirmed that he would’ve helped maggie anyway if she’d been honest with him from the get-go

look okay i’ll say it the negan/maggie fight scene was hot idc

armstrong lied and told the marshals he killed negan, which is nice, but will probably backfire on him later

hershel not seeming excited, relieved, grateful, or anything about maggie rescuing him. how long was he with the dama? seeing that he drew a picture of her and mentioned almost feeling safer there than at home, it almost seems like he liked being there or formed some kind of bond with her, despite her chopping one of his toes off.

their relationship makes me sad. i honestly also, sincerely find it a bit weird that they’re writing maggie as being “obsessed” with negan still? like i understand the idea of her having a hard time with looking at hershel and just being reminded of glenn, and that affecting her relationship with hershel and him being bothered by that. but hershel specifically says it feels like she only sees negan when she looks at him, not his dad. and that his whole life she’s just been looking over his shoulder waiting for negan. this feels weird to me, and is different from her being reminded of glenn and thus also what negan did, if that makes sense. she’s spent years and years away from negan, and that on top of how their relationship was at the end of season 11, this obsession being described doesn’t really make sense? you’re saying that throughout those years of finding and building communities, in private she’s still obsessing over him that noticeably? that it’s so bad that hershel thinks 5+ years later that she still cares more about “revenge” and says he felt safer in nyc with the dama? it doesn’t totally seem to line up with what we’re seeing. idk maggie deserves a better storyline than constantly revolving around negan and glenn. and vice versa for that matter. i don’t want hershel to turn out like he did in the comics.

i like that hershel seems to have creative hobbies. he’s great at drawing and i believe we saw him playing the guitar?

i don’t know how i feel about the River People, and the confirmation that there were more groups Negan once ruled over. with the whole “people are a resource” thing and negan being vehemently against simon wiping out entire communities, and all out war presumably being the first time negan got desperate enough to resort to killing everyone, what happened to the River group since they’re clearly not in the picture anymore by the time Rick’s group shows up? if they were truly unable to provide, thus negan killing someone when they fail to deliver, i don’t see negan just continuing to kill someone every week until there was no one left. so like what happened there. this is also another issue with them adding new things to negan’s pre-rick days. they do realize negan was only a leader for likely not even a year and a half? there was not that much time after lucille’s death for negan to find the sanctuary, take over, and go through a whole bunch of communities. I also don’t know whether or not i like negan offering to let the croat use lucille and be the person to “kill one” in order to get the group to submit. especially since it was said that croat was brand new to the group and didn’t even know how things worked yet?? though it’s hilarious he missed the first time. you’re embarrassing dad, dude.

quietly adding “negan is a gin man, not a brandy man” to my box of random info canon has given me, as someone who has never had a sip of alcohol in my life and therefore can do nothing with this information

“i have a funky cramp in my leg, buggin’ the shit out of me” old man (lovingly.) cramp in his leg bothering him but his shoulder that was stabbed is a-ok lol

for dama handing negan the key my notes literally just say “fckn toe in a box” lmao

they need to give us the croat’s and the dama’s real names in season 2 bc i cannot go the rest of my twd days calling them The Croat and The Dama every time they’re mentioned and i refuse to believe negan actually called him “the croat” the entire time he was at the sanctuary

if this doesn’t end in negan offing the dama and getting a second chance to lead and doing it The Right Way this time then i don’t want it

if there was more, i forgot it, and it’s nearly 4:30am so i am o u t bc I have work tomorrow

[moonjxsung]

hi it’s 🪲 again!!

RIGHT?! like i went from exclusively dating women (literally god’s gift to earth) to dating HIS CRUSTY ASS and THATS WHAT YOU DO?! i was so mad lmfao but i was also so fucking devastated because that was my best friend. i seriously spiraled to insanity after that because he was just such a big piece of me and i would always ran to him for support whenever my ptsd was triggered or anything like that, he just understood me in a way i never experienced before. so i was more hurt by the loss of my best friend more than anything. but i knew i couldn’t stand for the disrespect so i cut him off.

he did try to apologize, and i kinda gave him a chance as a friend because again, i missed the fuck out of my best friend. but i found out later on that he was telling the girl he cheated on me with every personal thing i’d told him. like i’m talking sexual abuse and parental abuse growing up (i probs won’t get into it because it’s heavy stuff and i don’t wanna trigger anybody) but yeah. like who does that?? i got dehydrated from crying so hard after that.

then summer came and i went back home and i shit you not, not a single minute of it was spent sober. i fucked around with boys and girls alike and i got myself pregnant, got an abortion, continued fucking around after that to ignore my grief of having to lose my child because i was in no way capable of taking care of it. and i was just a hot mess honestly.

i’m with someone new now, and she’s honestly so amazing. she’s so gentle and it’s like she’s developed this sixth sense where she just knows when i’m having a hard time. we’ve been together for a year now.

and now that i’m in a better place, i just look back and am shocked at the amount of red flags i ignored. like one time i was complaining about how my thighs really hurt after we had sex the night before and he deadass said: “that’s because you’re always so tense, i can feel you pushing me but i’m stronger” LIKE SIR???

but yeah men suck. point blank period.

also the guy who hurt you like that what the hell?? how dare this guy play you like that??? it’s on SIGHT ISTG i’m sorry he traumatized you like that, but you’re doing amazing and please please don’t let this asshole keep you from falling in love again, i promise they’re not all like that. ugh i hate men so so much and you deserve the world, star, i really mean it and i just know you’ll get someone that’ll make you happy and that won’t make you sick like that again 🥹❤️‍🩹💞

!!! I’m so happy to hear you’ve found someone who treats you better!!!! You deserve it so so so much bestie 🥹🫶 I’m just still baffled at somebody pining so hard after you and then doing all that shit to hurt you like HUH 😭 and divulging in all your private information to the other girl?? HELLO????? What a fucking dunce 🤢 it’s crazy when you look back and realize the red flags you ignored! I was letting every single thing slide and in hindsight it’s like yeah whyyyy would this have ended any other way? I hope you’re healing from everything you went through and I hope your new partner treats you the way you deserve (or else it’s on sight😤) I love you and my inbox is always open if you ever want to vent or just talk about how great things are going from here 🫶

I hope my ex dies simply put LMAO I don’t even try to date anymore or entertain anybody I just don’t think the stress of it is for me honestly 😭 I think writing and just existing by myself is fulfilling enough 🫶🩷 sending you all the love!!!!

[ferperss]

Loved reading your lore so thank you for the tag!! @sportsthoughts

I spent waaaay too much time writing this but once I started I felt like I couldn’t stop lmao, so I’m applauding anyone that gets through it!

The story of how I ended up where I am today is a long and winding road lmao. But I think I should start by prefacing with the fact that hockey has been a part of my life since I was born essentially. There are pictures of me on a pair of skates at around age 2 when my dad first tried to teach me! Then I played consistently from age 6 to 14 but quit when they wanted me to leave the “girls” team and play with the women because I was intimidated haha. Besides playing myself I’ve also spent many hours with my dad on the couch watching Sweden play in any and all kinds of tournaments, worlds, Olympics you name it, and since he never really rooted for any other team in Sweden or outside of it I just kind of slowly fell into that same thing. I knew there was a hockey league overseas that a lot of our own players were shipped off to but I never really had any interest in rooting for a team that wasn’t team Sweden at the time.

In the winter of 2014, I was at the ripe age of 15 and I did not play hockey anymore nor did I care about any teams really, but two of my best friends at the time became OBSESSED with this one junior player and kept talking about him. This man was none other than Thee Mr Willy Nylander himself. This led to the three of us obsessing over him and we watched him play in the world juniors over our winter break. It got to the point of us picking fights with people on twitter that said he was a bad player and really anyone that said anything negative about our Swedish players hahaha. We had a group chat named after him and everything. We eventually lost interest and forgot about him but this story is important because it comes back later.

Flash forward to May 2023! Before I entered my hockey era again I had an eight month long absolutely crushing obsession with the TV show 9-1-1 that was airing on Fox at the time (ABC now thank god, I still keep track) that came to a screeching halt when the season 6 finale aired and I hated it. I swore up and down that I was never ever going to watch that show again and now that the one thing I had been so fixated on for so long was gone I did not know what to do with myself. Which sounds so dramatic but honestly sometimes I don’t know who I am if I have nothing to obsess over. So naturally I needed entertainment and as I looked up through the haze of firefighters and network drama I found that the 2023 IIHF World Championship in Tampere and Riga was on! And I had no choice! There was hockey to be watched and I sure did watch it. Now, it did not go too well for the Swedish team last year, which is okay. But one thing that happened was the constant debate on wether Willy Nylander was going to join in. His brother was there and his teammate Timothy Liljegren also joined in. But there was no word on Willy himself. And it was all they talked about. He obviously did not end up joining but all the talk had made me nostalgic. And naturally I had to revisit the old object of obsession and see how he was doing over the Atlantic and turns out he was doing quite well indeed. And because I am a sucker for team dynamics and narratives (who could ever believe I studied film for five years) I desperately clung onto the Toronto Maple Leafs like my life depended on it. What I didn’t know was that these were also transformative times, and once I’d gotten into the team and the organization, I was bewildered when Kyle Dubas all of a sudden was going to another team??? How could that be?? The Penguins?? And that’s when I found my way to the Pittsburgh Penguins, the power of Dubas’ cardigans and Sidney Crosby’s fat ass gripped me and now I split my time between my equally cursed teams like they’re my divorced parents. And here we are.

Naturally there are a lot of nuances left out of here, I’ve covered the key points but I think that there are probably so many reasons that it was the perfect time for me to get into hockey again and here we are almost a year later and there’s no going back now!! I’m stuck here forever. And I would not have it any other way <3

This is the end of ramblings and I’ll say if there’s anything I love more than hockey, it’s being dramatic, and also I didn’t spell check this at all so if it’s not perfect I’m sorry (I’d love to blame it on English not being my first language but it’s the only subject I’ve always had straight A’s in so it’s not really applicable it’s just me being lazy)