#more crap doodles. just for you guys <3

[iwritenarrativesandstuff]

Asagiri, I am willing to forgive you for many things, but not for introducing a kickass time-stopping catgirl thief who apparently stole highly classified government documents

and then killing her off without even giving us her name

[fainthedcherry]

SOOO I went "SCREW IT POSTING THIS DOODLE BC I FELT LIKE IT"... AFTER LIKE...YEARS OF NOT DOING A SPONTANEOUS DOODLE UPLOAD WOW,,

Alex + Mushu (OCs) ft. the 4 official 2012 torts!!!

I've been in turtle-fever as you can tell,,, I finished this last week actually!!! I was doodling Marco and Niraj this week instead. BUT ALAS...HAVE A POST!!! HOLY CRAP GUYS I'M NOT DEAD AND I'M POSTING FREQUENTLY THIS MONTH!! AND ACTUALLY EXPRESSING MY INTEREST IN FANDOMS FOR ONCE AGAIN!! I might post something TMNT related Tuesday again!! ;D

No srsly why tf is it so hard for me to draw official characters instead of only drawing OCs, it's a curse for me sefklsdlkg

JUST AN IDEA I HAD TO DRAW THIS...NOTHING REALLY SUPER COMPLEX CAME TO MIND. Instead, I accidentally made the doodle w/ Raph 3-VP perspective, had to fix a bunch of lines, gave up on others. THIS WAS DRAWN WO/ A RULER AND YOU CAN TELL. SO DON'T MIND CRAPPY PERSPECTIVE INCONSISTENCY. I swear I can actually draw perspectives like a professional, I just choose to spend as little time as possible on paper. I hate drawing traditionally on paper, but I still force myself to stay in-practice, bc I get more organic ideas through that way. References are more of a digital-art thing for me...AAaaa dsrgrgkloj

I'm REALLY proud of Mikey here!!! My fav boi looks rlly good here,,, 😭

This is only like the 3rd time I've ever drawn these boys in my life!! I think this is a not bad start toward my cringe-embracing era. xD

Hope you don't mind me adding tags of the boys!! I just,,, am so happy I'll be able to!!!!!!!!!! JUST. JUST FINALLY I'VE DRAWN THEM IT MAKES ME SO HAPPY I FINALLY DARED TAKE THE STEP

Also adding TMNT OC tags,, hope you don't mind, I'm not trying to shill I swear, I just really like tagging my art honestly. 😭

[k1rameki]

i think i need to expand on my losergirl ayana agenda bc lord have i become hyperfixated (buckle up bc i have gone absolutely insane over this) (this might also end up becoming a hc dump uh oh) (also bear in mind thanks to all the recent art ive been seeing of her ive been on a real ayana kick when it comes to ships n shit so yeah some hcs with the other characters imma mention can be interpreted romantically too teehee) (and also!!! more general ayana hcs too :333 i have a cavity in mein cranium that can only be filled with soft ayana content)

also quick emoji keys for dialogue i may add for this ^_^

🎸 - aldryx

🩻 - tabi

🔻- ayana

🎧 - dalia

📼 - agoti

some of the many reasons i believe ayana is an absolute girlfailure is her complete and utter failure in her previous relationship/s (I SAY THIS BC SHE PROBABLY HAS BEEN IN A FEW THAT HAVENT WORKED OUT LONG BEFORE SHE MET BOYFRIEND,, also shes just awkward as hell but thats a story for anotha time)

NOT ONLY THAT BUT HELLO??? she appears so calm and collected whenever shes engaging in simple conversation but internally shes freaking out and she has no idea where anything is gonna end up going and often times she can and she WILL let stupid things slip out of her mouth and immediately she regrets it

and let me tell you this she gets more and more pathetic and losery around dalia,, this woman is in LOVE (hence that stupid doodle i made where aya's just freaking out over the slightest bit of affection given to her) (looks like she might have abandonment issues sorry what)

IN FACT. GIVING PHYSICAL AFFECTION TO EVERYONE. SHES ALL FOR THAT SHIT,, hugs, kisses, stroking hair, you name it, this girl is a massive cuddlebug you cant convince me otherwise

i mentioned my pastry chef ayana hc in passing but i'm gonna fully expand on that now: SO. also aya family hcs bc people should talk ab that but ayana's dad is a chef (no specific speciality, but he does make a lot of baked goods) and growing up she would often mirror what he does and that eventually led to her practicing and honing her skills! :D (she also studies culinary arts at college teehee) ALSO!!! she brings all sorts of baked goods she makes over for all her favourite people to enjoy constantly whether that be cookies, pastries, cakes, all of that yummy stuff

despite being an absolute loser girlfail idiot she can jam on the bass like its no tomorrow. IM TALKING ABOUT SLAP, FINGERPICKING, YOU NAME IT, SHE CAN DO IT ‼️‼️ here's an example of the bass playing style i had in mind for her, very energetic and fluid heuehehehehehe

SPEAKING OF (and this ties in a little with my band au) and whenever she drops an epic bassline everyone just stops and stares at her totally being in the zone

🔻: –casually having the time of her life playing a bassline like theres no tomorrow–

🎸: "yo holy crap aya where has this energy been this entire time"

🔻: "huh what do you mean"

HAIR EXTENSIONS!!! ive talked about this on discord before but ayana with naturally shorter hair so she wears hair extensions! (also bc gender euphoria but shhhh)

i also believe that aldryx and tabi had zero idea that she wore them and just believed her hair was naturally long. this is how their conversation went trust;

🔻: " hey guys ^_^"

🩻: ".....did you cut your hair?"

🔻: "no? my hair has always been short"

🎸: "IT HAS??!!??!!??! 😨 I THOUGHT YOUR HAIR WAS JUST REALLY LONG"

🩻: "ME TOO— jesus christ my life is a lie"

🔻: "theyre hair extensions not the holy grail calm down 😭😭😭"

AND NOW THAT WE'RE TALKING ABOUT AYANA INTERACTING WITH THE OTHERS, LET ME INTRODUCE YOU TO MY AGOTI/AYA DUO HC BC HELLO romantic or platonic these two are fucking adorable, the loserboy + losergirl pairing ever frfr (also bc i hc that theyre really close in age bc iirc ayana's birthday is january 28th so that would make her around 3-4 months younger than agoti to me at least teehee)

those two gossip about anything and everything and every single night they do each other's hair n spend time doing full fledged spa routines while talking shit about anyone and everyone bc theyre high maintenance as hell and take pride in their combined collection of bazillions of good smelling bodywashes and shampoos

🔻: "oh my god, goti i cant believe i forgot to tell you about some crazy interaction i had with someone earlier today i swear its driving me crazy"

📼: "BITCH AND YOU DIDNT TELL ME SOONER? YOU'D BETTER START FROM THE BEGINNING I NEED DETAILS IN FULL"

🔻: "OKOK SO WHAT HAPPENED WAS—"

also she works as a seamstress in her spare time when she's not doing music or baking ^_^ she often uses her expertise to create some outfits (with the help of sketches done by either tabi or agoti) and often has trouble finding someone to be her muse so she often gets dalia to help

she takes this VERY seriously by the way if she hears a singular complaint she will go insane

🎧: "how long is this gonna take 😔😔 my arms are getting sore babe i cant stand like this for much longer"

🔻: "dee i love you but i swear to god if you say that one more time i'm going to stab you with this needle until your arm is red and swollen BE PATIENT PLEASE IM BEGGING YOU 😭😭😭"

🎧: "😀😀😀😀😀 youre gonna WHAT"

also. shes got a BIG sweet tooth — she and tabi bond over sweets and trying all sorts of new things together, especially chocolatey things bc theyre both obsessed with chocolate anything

🩻: "aya i went to the store and i found this wafer cake thing and i thought you and i should try it"

🔻: "TABI THAT LOOKS DELICIOUS OMG go grab two spoons right now you and i are eating all of this right now"

🩻: "OKAY SURE :] i can already tell this is gonna taste good"

also sometimes she forgets to eat proper meals and will consistently only have sweets and snacks all day until someone calls her out on it, shes very forgetful, oopsies!

[choccyhearts]

Eddie Munson Headcanons

Note: A stream of unconscious thoughts and ideas lol

CW: Swearing (cause i feel VERY pASSIONATELY), pretty much all fluffy and nice because I enjoy happy/nerdy/goofy Eddie, mentions of being high (ofc)

Most definitely has a special stuffed animal he's hidden away, most likely a tiger or polar bear that's been crushed and flattened to all hell. It's so hidden in fact, that Eddie actually forgets where it is. (But Wayne always knows)

Mans loves playing characters at the silliest of times

Like, if his partner wears curlers to bed, he's going to suddenly start acting like a 50's suburban husband (but not in a toxic way!!)

"Work today was brutal, darling! Thompson was kissing up to the boss and trying to butter him up for the new promotion! I'll show him where he can kiss it! And on my way home, I passed these-these teenagers! They were listenin' to some of that rock n' roll racket! Hollywood and it's James Whoevers and Pelvis Elvis, it's all noise!"

He'll rub his eyes and give a big yawn, turning off the lights and doing the dad stumble to bed

Not a lover of Christmas, but if his partner celebrates it and enjoys it, he'll try to find some Christmas spirit

Like, despite the younger ones being in literal high school and having fought horrifying hellish monsters together, he'll force them all to gather near him with their hot cocoas and candy canes as he reads The Night Before Christmas

Yes, of fucking course he's going to do the different voices. His Santa gets better each and every year

You can also guarantee that despite nearing 30 when it comes out, he will go and see The Nightmare Before Christmas when it comes out in the 90s and will enjoy it very much so

He gives me the vibe that even if it's not verbally, if he's feeling down and goes out for a walk, he is greeting every squirrel he sees. I do not give a fuck if you disagree, he's most certainly not a hater of animals. He's a "Hello, squirrel" motherfucker

Honestly, I could see him doing that more if his partner 1. Finds it adorable or 2. Does it themselves

When he's older, especially a dad, he's a silly hat enjoyer. Like, c'mon. Santa hats? Duh. Hats that say crap like "Foxy grandpa"? Yes. It's Thanksgiving dinner and he comes out sporting a turkey hat, type of silly

He says it's ironic, and it might start out that way, but he would definitely love it if he receives silly hats as gifts

Like when he gets to be Wayne's age, he's kicking back with a beer wearing a "Fish fear me, Women want me" hat

He has a special notebook that's filled with little special scraps of paper. It's brown and leather and has straps that wrap around it. He hides it inside of his mattress (cause he unhinged like that)

It has concert tickets, tickets for movies he really liked, notes he's been passed that he thinks are funny or are meaningful, doodles his friends have done, either for him or around him, candy or gum wrappers that he thinks look cool or might never eat again if they're from out of the state or country. There's also folded up posters for Corroded Coffin and zines him and the band made to promote their shows

It looks like a little trash booklet, but it's his trash booklet

When the first gets too full he gets a new one

This one has torn out scraps of catalogs, magazines or newspapers because they're what he used to teach his children different words. Baby formula labels, clothing tags, crayon scribbled napkins

It's just filled with mementos from his true grown adult life

The day he decides to let go of his glorious long hair his friends will all be in mourning. They love him with his new hairstyle, but God, does it sting -- it also signifies, yes, the 80's are dead

But don't worry, he did dress as Frankenfurter for a Halloween gig Corroded Coffin did much to chagrin of the other members before he did the big chop

He did not, however, wear heels or a corset (in public that is </3)

Rockstar!Eddie likes trying to take pictures with the guys in front of either iconic monuments or state/city signs while on tour

It's cute the first couple times, especially when they travel across the world, but it soon turns to:

"Eddie, we have stopped in front of this Idaho sign 5 times already, nobody gives a shiiit", Gareth whines, sleepily rubbing his eyes

"Aw, come on guys, it's tradition!!"

"Get the fuck back on the bus, it's 4 AM", Jeff yawns

Eddie gets them to come around by agreeing to skip seeing the world's biggest yarn ball

Went to the younger ones' graduation and held up the largest, most obnoxious video camera ever (Steve only begrudgingly let him film because Eddie made a point saying Steve should just sit and enjoy this one event)

He screamed at the top of his lungs for each of them resulting in Steve only half-enjoying the event

He has to spin in spiny chairs at least once or he will combust

Keeps ready-to-bake cookie dough in his fridge for smoke seshes

Once made and ate an inside-out peanut butter and jelly sandwhich when he got toooo high and didn't realize what was wrong until he was done and his hands were sticky

Lovingly calls Wayne, "Old man" -- "Whatchu talkin' bout old man?"

Used to carve creepy messages into trees to fuck with people but stopped when someone told him it hurts the tree's feelings

Would love to learn how to cook or bake but doesn't know who to ask/is afraid to ask

Picks up shiny things he sees without even thinking about it

Says, "It's not even that cold" when it's single digit degrees

However would gladly accept a pair homemade of mittens made for him and would wear them every winter

I'll cap it here for now, I might make some more though ^_^ Also, lmk if anyone wants specific headcanons because I have a bunch of ideas like:

◇ Dad!Eddie (Rockstar or mechanic)

◇ 90s!Eddie

◇ Holiday stuff

[unabashedrebel]

I posted 145 times in 2022

16 posts created (11%)

129 posts reblogged (89%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@fair-fae

@rumze

@baenling

@minilev

@alannah-corvaine

I tagged 28 of my posts in 2022

#pretty art - 6 posts

#rebloop - 3 posts

#boosty - 3 posts

#sori art - 3 posts

#soriya - 3 posts

#basically my main - 1 post

#character sheet - 1 post

#updated 11/28 - 1 post

#based on my likes lmao - 1 post

#is this another neil gaiman situation??? - 1 post

Longest Tag: 54 characters

#yo ngl wrathion and sabellion annoy the crap out of me

My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

✿ :  Fondest role-play memory, between muns?

You mean there’s more then just shared trauma of occupying the same fandoms?

I mean when you do this for almost two decades it’s kind of hard to pick a favorite situation or instance.

Okay okay okay not a specific RP one but one time I was replaying OoT and my friend (whom I sometimes RP with) literally drew fan art of me with a switch and a bong. Very wholesome, wholly recommend having friends. They surprise you with some cool shit sometimes. We were roleplaying being people at the time >.> <.<

Shout out to @lukelxiv who’s doodles are honestly pretty dope. They’re okay too (<3)

Thanks for the ask @sundered-souls !

5 notes - Posted November 28, 2022

#4

Kirollis: In all the years you’ve known me what makes you think I’m a narc?

Soriya: You literally spy on people for the state. That’s like the entire definition of what a narc is.

Kirollis:

5 notes - Posted September 19, 2022

#3

Hey you. Hope you’re doing okay. This is your reminder that you are awesome. ❤️

>.> shhh, come on Ris I told you to let everyone keep thinking I’m dead 😜

8 notes - Posted March 17, 2022

#2

Idk what you guys are doing with the 5 year time jump but I’m giving Kiro a dad bod.

9 notes - Posted August 27, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

What that mouth do?

Complain

11 notes - Posted November 23, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

[jamieedlund]

How do you think aaravos would react if there was a person he could not manipulate. I mean if he's trying to be his sweet charming and very convincing self and there like yeah ok hi nice to meet you to and just acts like his voice doesn't put them into a trance. They just smile and help him with stuff and act like he's just another elf.

I imagine he'd be so frustrated and interested in this strange person. He'd fallow them around just trying to figure out why his charm doesn't work lol

There are two(or maybe 3???) things that I think are being asked here--- Um so... let's go I guess???

⚠Warning somewhat a short read⚠

Still gonna leave a doodle here because I'll never answer fun questions about my agenda without providing you all with something nice( •̀ ω •́ )✧

1. I don't think there is a single person that Aaravos cannot manipulate...Cause...he's Aaravos. He'll always find a way.

2. If they just think of him as regular guy and can't seem to be manipulated, I doubt he'll even be interested in that because he has a somewhat grandiose sense of self. I think he likes himself enough that it doesn't particularly bother him when people are just normal around him and don't think he's THAT attractive. In fact that would probably bored him.

Why waste time caring about someone who doesn't find him extraordinary when he can be doing literally anything else that excites him lol.

I think he's also encountered a fair share of people who all thought of him differently so I feel like he's probably seen it all: it's a hassle to be worshipped, it's boring to be treated normally and it's kinda funny to a laughable degree to be looked down upon.

In short, it takes a super specific type of person, one that doesn't bore him nor infuriate him to get him invested.

3. Since I'm only ever writing about Callum in regards to him, I'll say this, out of literally everyone in the show, I can only see Callum being able to snatch up Aaravos(idk in what way go figures?) because:

He's someone truly good-hearted, and was proven to be incorruptible by dark magic, which that by itself probably has never came into existent within the canon so... it's pretty fricking special to begin with.

He's also innocent enough that Aaravos could easily manipulate but can't help but like at the same time because it's "terrifying", especially when he gets mad.

He's capable of keeps him grounded

Being funny, kind and understanding but firm and perhaps also a bit cruel at times when he thinks his master's decision is hurting others or himself (this is the scary part) I don't think Aaravos would ever be interested in anyone unless they can toggle between being his biggest simp while simultaneously scaring the crap outta him 🤣🤣🤣

My final verdict? There are more things to be done than trying to impress someone who doesn't think he's special when he probably understands this is just the fact of life lol.

I think the follow up is a minor stuff but like - the only person I can see that's capable of making him feel "frustrated" is one who is innocent, kind and believes in him with all of their heart. One that's always be willing to throw hands for him because they know he's a good person. I wouldn't call this frustration either though haha...Maybe he would pull some rare faces with some indecipherable expression 🤣

What can be more frustrating than thinking you are no longer capable of being good and was locked away for 300 year only to be shaken to the core by someone who believes in you whole-heartedly.

It'll definitely piss him off :))) In a fun and exciting way.

[absolutepokemontrash]

MC’s Half Demon and They Look Awfully Familiar Part 4

(The side characters strike again!)

Part 1 Part 2 Lessons 1-5 Part 2.5 Group Retreat Lessons 10-12 Part 3

L!MC= Lucifer’s kid | M!MC= Mammon’s kid | A!MC=Asmo’s kid

Let’s get right to it!

The Uncle That Hardcore Simps For His Spouse In the Most Wholesome Way (Diavolo)

Gasp! More half-demon kids? Oh my! Maybe if he tried again next year a kid of his own would pop down! Hang on- he hadn’t slept with a human in almost a century... dang. No kids for him...

...maybe...

Remember when I said Diavolo would try to do those stereotypical dad (tm) things and be hip with the kids? Yeah he keeps doing that.

The number of broken windows related to wayward baseballs goes up 150%. At least that’s how they all figured out that M!MC is nearsighted like their dad!

M!MC had developed a bit of a habit of telling Diavolo about cool human stuff and making the Crown Prince even more interested in the human world than normal.

You may be thinking “what’s so bad about that?” well, the number of yo-yos at RAD went up so high that Lucifer had to ban them.

Belphie and Satan, being the rebels they are, became yo-yo masters specifically to spite Lucifer.

It was sort of like the fidget spinners craze if you were in school for that.

Oh, hi Lord Diavolo. What’s a fidget spinner? It’s this- I should stop talking...

Since no one learned their lesson from the previous incident, Diavolo threw another BBQ.

“Why are we doing this again?” L!MC asked to no one in particular.

“Don’t worry, L!MC. I’ve taken every precaution possible to make sure that what happened last time doesn’t happen again.” Diavolo said and continued in his crusade to cover the entire pathway with sidewalk chalk doodles.

L!MC, Luke, Diavolo, M!MC, Belphie, and A!MC were all busily drawing a wide variety of doodles and drawings with chalk while the other guests milled around nearby. A!MC was in the middle of drawing quite the nice looking Cerberus chibi, while M!MC and Belphie were drawing a lot of stick figures. L!MC and Luke had just finished a wonderful drawing of... an alpaca? Giraffe? Thing...? Hell, even they didn’t know what it was.

Diavolo looked over at M!MC’s stick figure army with a big smile on his face. “So what are all of them doing? It looks like that one’s flying!”

You could practically hear the Addam’s Family theme play as M!MC and Belphie looked at each other and grinned.

“Oh Belphie was just talking about L!MC’s flying lesson fails and I felt that an artist’s rendition was needed.” M!MC explained, he began to point out certain doodles. “Here’s L!MC getting up off the ground, then there’s them actually flying, and this is them falling in the fountain.”

L!MC looked over at the chalk and glared at M!MC. “It’s generous to call that an artist’s rendition. It looks like crap.”

“And what did you draw?” Belphie smirked at the alpaca-giraffe-thing, Luke protectively covered up the drawing (side note, Luke was wearing white and playing with sidewalk chalk, by the end of the day he looked like a walking pride flag).

“None of your business!” Luke huffed.

“And what about that one?” Diavolo seemed completely oblivious to the hostility brewing between the two groups, A!MC was completely used to this and walked away to grab a drink.

“Ah, good eye, Lord Diavolo!” M!MC chirped. “This is a drawing of the time L!MC almost burned down your kitchen.”

Diavolo laughed and gave M!MC a few pats on the head. “Very accurate!”

“You’re so lucky I followed the rules and didn’t bring a water gun...” L!MC growled as they slowly reached for their backpack.

“Yeah... lucky. Real lucky...” M!MC nodded as they tried to casually reach for their bag, Belphie followed suit.

“I’m so glad we all followed the rules.” Luke smiled, his own hand inching towards his bag.

There was a brief moment of stillness before the four of them whipped out their water guns and pointed them at each other.

“This BBQ ain’t big enough for the both of us!” M!MC’s terrible cowboy impression aside, their gun was poised to shoot directly at Luke and L!MC’s alpaca-giraffe-thing.

“Everyone, I know this is a human world tradition but-”

Belphie silenced Diavolo by pointing his water gun at him. “Sh, don’t talk unless you have a water gun as well.”

Deciding not to smite Belphie for treason, Diavolo pulled his own water gun out of his shirt. “Okay, what now?”

“Now, we’re in a standoff...” L!MC glowered at M!MC, the air was practically crackling with hostility...

Until a burst of flames got everyone to whirl around to see A!MC with hairspray and a lighter.

“No water guns! I refuse to go home shivering and covered in grass again!”

Crisis averted. Everyone went to go fail at throwing beanbags into a hole instead of shooting each other.

That was probably for the best... Belphie filled everyone’s water guns with paint.

The Uncle That Does All the Cooking for Family Dinners (Barbatos)

Remember how I said that Barbs liked smol Lucifer? Yea, he likes smol Asmo too. Smol Asmo is willing to admit that they don’t know how to use an oven and is willing to learn.

M!MC is formally banned from being within 50 feet of the kitchen. It’s for the best.

A!MC often tries to get Barbatos to look into the possible futures so they can see if they can avoid messing anything up and A!MC is just so adorable that Barbatos actually thinks about it.

He still says no every single time.

“Could you at least tell me if I have the possibility of doing something embarrassing in the near future?”

“My apologies, A!MC, but no.”

“P-please?”

“The answer remains the same.”

A!MC sighed and went back to helping chop vegetables. Under Barbatos’ tutelage, A!MC’s cooking ability had increased tenfold, they could now make as many burgers as they wanted without worrying about burning down the kitchen.

Pitying the anxious half-demon, Barbatos sighed. “I cannot confirm nor deny a future where your outfit gets ruined.”

A!MC perked up. “H-huh?”

“I cannot confirm nor deny a future where your outfit gets ruined.”

Quickly understanding what Barbatos was trying to do, A!MC quickly nodded and spent the rest of the cooking time carefully taking note of their surroundings.

“Hey! What’re you guys doin’?” M!MC had managed to get in... damn! Everyone must have been putting their best efforts in keeping Solomon away from the kitchen and forgot about M!MC...

“We’re just finishing up, M!MC,” Barbatos had on his ‘oh no...’ smile. “We don’t need any help.”

“Really? You guys sure?”

“Why are you so interested?” A!MC asked.

“Lucifer said that idle hands are the devil’s playthings and that I should go look for something productive to do.” M!MC huffed. “Very ironic phrase.”

“F-fine, I guess you can...” A!MC searched for the least destructive task they could give. “Take the utensils and set the table.”

M!MC gave them a mock salute and grabbed the utensils, as they turned to leave, they knocked a large bowl of chopped fruit over, sending the fruit pieces flying.

Remembering Barbatos’ prediction, A!MC didn’t bother to try and stop the fruit from falling, they only grabbed the nearest big plate they could find and shielded their outfit from harm. The fruit splattered harmlessly against the shield.

“Whoops... my bad. You alright, A!MC?” M!MC asked as A!MC inspected their outfit.

“Y-yes actually...” A!MC turned to Barbatos, who was already getting the cleaning supplies.

“Thank you!” A!MC whispered.

Barbatos smiled and nodded. “You’re very welcome, A!MC.”

Barbatos now has two sorta-children. A!MC and Luke!

M!MC means well, I swear! He just shouldn’t be allowed in a cooking environment!

The Cousin That Your Mom Points at and Goes “Look at Him, He Helps With the Dishes, Be More Like Him.” (Simeon)

Oh man... time for some more embarrassing stories.

“Asmo was the most adorable child, it’s a shame he was such a troublemaker...”

“Really? My dad?”

“What about mine?”

“I think you can guess.”

I cannot comment on Simeon’s help with flying lessons because I refuse to Headcanon what Simeon’s wings look like until canon gives us a GLIMMER. LIKE SERIOUSLY SOLMARE IM CURIOUS-

I have a feeling the children were quite curious as well.

“What do you think his wings look like?” M!MC asked A!MC as the two peered around the corner of one of the hallways in Purgatory Hall.

“I bet they’re super nice. But besides that...” A!MC leaned over and squinted. “Why is Simeon writing with a pen and pencil? He’s writing a book... shouldn’t he use a computer?”

“Bold of you to assume he knows how to use a computer.” M!MC snickered.

A!MC frowned. “Don’t be mean... I’m sure he knows how...”

Simeon picked up his DDD and took a picture of his face, seemingly by accident, with the flash on, causing him to drop the phone in surprise.

“Probably...”

The two surveyed their angel friend like two wildlife documenters, here we see, the Simeon, not in his natural habitat, surrounded by confusing technology...

“Do you think if we scare him his wings might pop out in surprise?” M!MC wondered aloud, A!MC shrugged.

“Maybe... but I don’t think we should bother him...” A!MC whispered. “He looks busy.”

“What are you two doing?”

It took literally every bit of willpower for the two half demons to not scream in absolute terror at the sudden interruption.

Ah... it was just Solomon... in an apron... Solomon... in cooking clothes...

Oh no.

“Spying on Simeon?” Solomon asked.

“N-no...” A!MC giggled nervously. “Just crouching casually in this hallway...”

“...smooth, A!MC.” M!MC rolled their eyes.

“Well, it’s great that you two are here, I made lunch!”

A!MC and M!MC looked at each other in pure horror, they needed to get out of there!

“Uh- um... we’d love to but...” M!MC looked around frantically before just pointing at a random spot behind Solomon. “LOOK! A DISTRACTION!”

A!MC and M!MC ran out of there as fast as their legs could carry them. Finding out if Simeon had wings was not worth being poisoned. Not at all...

Good ol’ Simeon... Mr. Cristopher Peugeot on the other hand- M!MC had some questions for him.

“TSL is literally the most popular book series ever, does that mean you’re completely loaded?”

“Oh, no I’m not, I don’t have any use for human world money in the Celestial Realm. All the profits go to charity.”

“...Dude really?”

“That’s nice of you, Simeon!”

“You didn’t keep any of it..?”

Wait... Who the Hell Are You..? (Solomon)

So A!MC basically has three dads; Fabulous-dad, butler-dad, and wizard-dad!

“So you just... have capes lying around?”

“Yes, would you like a cape?”

“Okay if they don’t take the cape I want it.”

Solomon shows up to RAD with his nails painted different wacky styles every week, courtesy of A!MC.

Though- the unholy combination that is M!MC and Solomon is feared by all.

“Road work ahead?”

“Uh, yeah I sure hope it does.”

Solomon and M!MC’s rampant quoting of vines elicited another glare from Lucifer.

Despite Solomon having literally been alive since the seven rulers of hell were angels, he had kept up with pop culture fairly decently. Decently enough that M!MC had someone that wasn’t Levi to bounce memes off.

“Pff...” M!MC suppressed a laugh at a seemingly normal water bottle advertisement. “Enslaved moisture.”

“I’m not going crazy, right Simeon? You’re hearing this too?” Lucifer tiredly turned to the angel, who shook his head.

“This is just the tip of the iceberg. Solomon quacked at M!MC earlier and they lost their minds laughing about it.” Simeon shrugged, unbothered by the sorcerer and the half demon’s rampant meme-ing behind them.

Lucifer on the other hand, was quite bothered. Incredibly bothered, if you will. “If you two don’t shut up right now I’m going to-”

“Quick! We must abscond!” Solomon turned and heelied away, followed by M!MC. The shoes that Mammon bought to replace the ones lost during the casino incident were apparently heelies as well...

The day was saved when a rock jammed one of Solomon’s wheels and he slammed face first into the concrete. Yikes... that had to hurt.

A!MC had fun glow in the dark bandaids for Solomon to patch up his face. Even though he he could heal himself with magic, he let A!MC do what they wanted because they were just too adorable to say no to.

Asmo has pictures

The Cousin Squad (tm)

(Luke, L!MC, A!MC, and M!MC)

Ah yes, the bab squad. The most adorable group in the Devildom. Surrender your candy immediately or face destruction.

M!MC teases the crap out of Luke, and A!MC tries to stop it, but L!MC is the one who manages to actually make M!MC stop.

Only L!MC gets to pick on the smol angel. GOT IT?!

A!MC and Luke are already baking buddies because of butler-dad so they get along swimmingly.

Poor Luke’s the victim of many of M!MC’s shenanigans.

Luke: Are you sure this is safe, M!MC?

M!MC (about to put mentos into the bottle of coke Luke is holding): No.

L!MC and A!MC get along really well, being honest, everyone loves A!MC.

A!MC makes sure L!MC gets some sleep because they don’t want their cousin picking up on Lucifer’s habit of living off of coffee and coffee alone. L!MC doesn’t get it but they’re very grateful anyway.

M!MC and A!MC were friends from the start. Well... M!MC decided they were friends right from the start and A!MC did not have the ability to fight the power of friendship.

M!MC: You are being befriended. Please do not resist.

Since M!MC is great and amazing like their pop, they took it upon themselves to be the friend that speaks up when A!MC is too nervous to do so.

M!MC and L!MC? Lucifer and Mammon 2 electric boogaloo. Sorta.

L!MC and M!MC bicker all the time but the babs bounce back from their fights way easier.

One minute they’re at each other’s throats and the next they’re showing each other memes.

“There’s no escaping this.”

Lucifer stood between M!MC and the door... their one way ticket to freedom...

“You need to go to the dentist.”

The entire HOL plus the Purgatory Hall crew were getting ready to go visit the dentist to get their teeth cleaned. It was the time of the year that Mammon dreaded most... and his child felt the same way.

“My teeth are fine! Lemme stay home! I’ll hold down the fort with dad!” M!MC smiled and nodded as enthusiastically as they could, but even the most unobservant person couldn’t miss the sweat beading on their forehead.

“Beel.” Lucifer snapped his fingers and before M!MC could do anything Beel had thrown them over his shoulder like a sack of potatoes.

“Don’t worry M!MC, the dentist isn’t that scary.” Beel tried to assure them. By the way M!MC was still kicking and screaming, they were not convinced.

“Y-yeah kiddo, suck it up! Don’t be a baby! I’m just gonna take my car there-”

“MAAAAAAMOOOON?!”

“YIKES!”

Lucifer had the important task of keeping a hold of Mammon as the very large group made their way to the dentist’s office.

A devious little idea popped into L!MC’s head as they all sat down in the waiting room. They began to hum a familiar little tune.

“She said be a deeeentiiiist~ a dentist!” L!MC sang to M!MC, who’s attempts to escape increased tenfold after hearing the song.

A!MC began to hum along, not seeming to notice the commotion going on next to them.

“Son be a deeentiiiiiist~ people will pay you for causing them PAIN! She said be a deeentiiiiiist~”

Belphie perked up and smiled deviously as he realized what L!MC was doing, he began to sing along as well. The three were a veritable choir of terror to poor M!MC. Mammon did not understand his child’s terror and was more unnerved by what a great team Belphie and L!MC made.

Satan rolled his eyes and tried to focus on his book, Asmo was absorbed in his magazine, Levi was having a very in depth conversation with the fish in the aquarium, Simeon and Solomon chatted about school, and Luke was stuck watching the train wreck go down.

Thankfully, it was halted by Lucifer. “L!MC, A!MC, Belphegor, stop tormenting M!MC with show tunes.”

“You would have made a good dentist in another life, Lucifer,” Belphie cooed. “You know what they say, the only difference between a dentist and a sadist is that one has newer magazines.”

Asmo grimaced at his magazine. “Is it the sadist? Because I’m reading a magazine from 1843...”

The conversation was interrupted by one of the dental hygienists coming into the waiting room and saying that Mammon was up first. The Avatar of Greed’s final escape attempt was foiled by Satan (not even looking up from his book) clotheslining him.

Thirty minutes later, Mammon emerged from the forbidden dentist room, with the look of trauma in his eyes and eating a lollipop.

One by one, the group went in, A!MC took it upon themselves to try and make the rapidly panicking Luke feel better.

“It won’t be too scary, in the human world dentists are usually very nice.” A!MC smiled encouragingly.

“I-I’m sure that’s true but...” Luke looked around. “We aren’t in the human world...”

Asmo skipped back in and flashed a blinding grin to the group. “Absolutely perfect, no flaws! It’s your turn, A!MC!”

“If you die I get to say I told ya so!” M!MC shouted as A!MC walked into the dentist’s room.

They did not in fact, die because of the dentist. A!MC walked out and gave a thumbs up. “The dentist said they had never seen a kid with such perfect teeth.”

“That’s my baby!” Asmo chirped.

“M!MC, you’re up.” A!MC and Beel had to practically drag the poor kid out of the room and into the dentist area of doom.

“GO BE A DEEEEEENTIIIIIIST!” Belphie and L!MC shouted one last time as the doors shut. Wow, what dickheads...

Mammon probably would have tried to save his poor little bugger, but he was in the middle an impromptu therapy session with Simeon over the scary scraping dentist knife thingie.

Beel was the last to go, and he walked out of the dentist’s room with his face covered in blood, the dentist walked out after him, missing a hand.

“You tasted like toothpaste.” Beel sighed. “Not good.”

“Don’t worry,” The dentist said to Luke, who looked like he was about to pass out. “My hand will grow back in about four to five minutes.”

Luke, still terrified, nodded. L!MC patted him on the shoulder.

“Anyway, almost all of you are fine, but I have to recommend M!MC to the orthodontist.” The dentist flipped through their notepad one-handed. “Their secondary set of fangs are coming out crooked and need to be corrected with braces immediately.”

M!MC sat calmly for a moment, then attempted to sprint out the door. “NO NO NO NO NO!” One of the dental hygienists grabbed them by the back of their shirt and halted their escape.

“Sucks to be you.” L!MC smirked.

“And L!MC needs to fix their cross bite, braces are a strong possibility.”

The colour drained from L!MC’s face as the news dawned upon them. “Pardon, but what exactly are you talking about..?”

“Your top jaw and bottom jaw aren’t properly lined up.” The dentist explained. “It will lead to problems later if it’s not fixed now.”

Lucifer rubbed his temples and sighed. “L!MC, if you try and run away I swear...”

L!MC stiffened and shook their head. “I’m not some coward, I’m not running away. Just... what exactly are you going to do to my mouth?”

The dentist pulled up a few pictures of the braces and explained what would be done. L!MC nodded, and turned to their father with a big smile on their face.

“It won’t be so bad, mind if I go to the bathroom before I get the mold for my teeth made?”

Lucifer nodded and almost audibly sighed in relief. He basked in the glory of having a child that wasn’t afraid of the dentist and faced their fears like an adult-

L!MC sprinted past the dentist’s office, they had busted out of the bathroom window.

“...Beel.”

“Yep.”

A few minutes later, Beel returned with a completely irate L!MC who was screaming their demands to be put down and be allowed to run for the hills. Taking advantage of the distraction, M!MC ran for the door again, only for Belphie to tap them on the forehead.

M!MC collapsed into a snoring heap on the floor.

“FATHER! DON’T MAKE ME DO THIS!” L!MC practically screamed as they tried to wrestle themselves out of Beel’s bear hug.

Lucifer rolled his eyes. “L!MC, calm yourself down. It’s just braces.”

“AS EVERYONE HERE AS MY WITNESSES I’LL NEVER FORGIVE YOU FOR THIS! NEVER!”

The half-demons in need of braces were dragged right back into the dentist’s area... poor fools.

“They’ll be okay... right?” Luke asked.

“Of course they will be. It’s just braces.” Simeon patted Luke on the head. “They’ll both be fine.”

The scream that came from down the hall right after Simeon said that did not reassure anyone.

“Hey,” Mammon piped up. “How much do braces cost?”

“From what I know about dental procedures,” Satan rubbed his chin. “A few thousand Grimm.”

“Mammon if you try and run for that door I will cut your credit card into a thousand pieces.” Lucifer growled.

Overall, it was a fairly average trip to the dentist. 0/10 would not recommend. A few weeks later L!MC and M!MC were fitted with their mouth prisons- I mean braces, and the two cousins bonded over their horrific mouth pain...

Seriously- braces suck.

——————————————

So! Those are the headcanons! Four and a half whole parts... phew... To all the people who enjoyed this series, thank you so so much for reading! You guys have been so super nice!

Fret not, I plan on writing more for this universe! From what I know about season 2 of Obey Me things will get... interesting. Stay tuned for more! Or don’t, I can’t force you.

...or can I?

[the-tiger-with-a-computer]

Twisted Wonderland NoSleep Au

Heartslabyul Part 3

Recap: After getting the chestnuts needed to make the apology tart the group now meets up with Trey in the kitchen.

Grim: We got the chestnuts. Now we can make a delicious tart.

Trey: We still have to peel them you know. It will be a challenge, but I know we can do it.

After peeling all the chestnuts Trey tricked basically everyone but Yuu and Cater into thinking that oyster sauce was needed for the tart. Then Trey released that he made to much marrow paste. So it was up to Yuu, Grim, and Deuce to go to the school store to buy the ingredients to make more whipped cream. The following happens:

Deuce: Wow, this place is amazing. Do you think this place actually sells the items we need?

Yuu: I believe so. I mean, back home it was pretty common for all types of stores to carry items like protection charms, bleach, scrubbers, and especially religious items.

Deuce: I can kinda understand the charms and religious items part. But why carry bleach and scrubbers?

Yuu: In case someone gets killed.

Deuce was about to ask Yuu to elaborate when Sam, the owner of the school store, came in to welcome Deuce and Yuu.

Sam: Hey, my lost little demons, how goes it? Welcome to Mr.S ‘s Mystery Shop. What can I do for you today? A charm for uncharted lands? Mummy of an ancient king? Or how about some cursed tarot cards?

Deuce: We’d like the things written here.

Grim: And some cans of tuna.

Yuu: We have enough tuna back at the dorm, we don’t need anymore anytime soon. Anyway, got any protection charms?

Deuce: No. No tuna or protection charms. Let’s just get the things we came here to get.

Sam: What what? Whipped cream, eggs… Oh! A nice sweet line-up. Ok! Coming right up.

Deuce: Wow, he really does have them.

Yuu: Well, the school store does need to have everything a student would need. And then some.

Sam: Sorry ‘bout the wait. It’s a bit heavy, you got it? If you order now you can get a 1/100 size floating platter to carry your purchases for 30% off.

Grim: What’s that? Sounds cool!

Deuce: We’re good. Thank you. It’s time to go.

Grim: But I wanna hang around more.

Yuu: If we hurry, Trey might let us eat something sweet.

Grim: Then what are we waiting for! Let’s get a move on!

Sam: Make sure to come by again!

*However as Yuu left with Deuce and Grim Sam couldn’t help but wonder about the new student. After what he has heard about their homeworld from Crowley sparked curiosity in both him and his friends. If what he thinks is true. Then Yuu might have come from a much darker world then his friends.*

On the way back to the kitchen Deuce offered to carry Yuu’s bag for them. When Yuu said that it was all right Deuce insisted saying that he was used to carrying heavy things as he would help his mom carry groceries. And since he was the only boy, he would be stuck doing anything requiring strength.

Deuce: Ah, I’ve just been talking about myself.

Yuu: Well I think that helping your family is a wonderful thing. Where I’m from, family is very important and to betray their trust would be to go against everything that both monsters and humans believe in. Helping your family, and anyone you see as family, is considered a very honorable thing to do. To do them harm is considered one of the worst things a human can do.

Deuce: Wow. You must miss them very much then. But, the thing is…. I always made my mom…

Before Deuce could finish his sentence he bumped into someone, breaking some eggs in the process.

Grim: Ahh! The eggs!

Deuce: $h*t, half of the eggs are destroyed! There’s egg all over the bag!

Delinquent A: Hey you! Watch where you’re… wait… You’re the fools who wreaked the egg in my carbonara earlier.

Delinquent B: It’s you guys again. You can’t catch a break!

Deuce: You were the ones who jumped out from behind the corner. At lunch, it wasn’t like you couldn’t eat the egg anymore but you still came to pick a fight… Just now, you destroyed half our eggs.

Grim: Yeah, that’s right.

Delinquent A: And? You sayin’ it’s our fault?

*Yuu, knowing that this will not end well, and with no way to defuse the situation stepped away from them. But at the same time they were ready to step in and help Deuce if it came to that.*

Deuce: Yes. Please pay for the eggs. And please apologize to the chickens too.

Delinquent B: Hmmm? You’re getting all worked up over eggs.

Delinquent A: They didn’t hit the ground right? Don’t sweat the small stuff.

Delinquent B: We saved you the trouble of breaking them.

Yuu could stand by no longer and decided to step in. After all, they had enough of these two boys nonsense.

Yuu: Well, you did damage what we payed for. I expect to at least be paid back in the amount the broken eggs cost. Think you can do that?

Delinquent A: Don’t think you can boss us around, just because we broke a few eggs!

Yuu: This is more than just about a few eggs. As I recall you two have been causing quite a bit of trouble as of late. Would be a shame if the principal knew of your antics.

*This was very much true as Yuu had used the ghost camera to take pictures of both the good and the bad. Let’s just say that Yuu had quite a bit of dirt on these two in particular*

Delinquent B: Is that a threat I hear?

Yuu: A warning actually.

Delinquent A: Looks like we need to teach these two a lesson.

Deuce: HEY! You don’t get to make decisions for us! These eggs… instead of becoming a chick they were gonna make us a delicious tart!! And you sure as he!! wouldn’t EVER hurt my friends! You get it! Huh!?

Delinquent B: What’s this guy’s problem all the sudden!?

Deuce: If you don’t wanna pay for the six eggs you broke… I’ll just punch you six times instead.

Delinquent A: Whaaaaa!?

Yuu: Time to fight!

Deuce: Grit your teeth a$$ho!e$!!

Let’s just say that the two never stood a chance. With Deuce’s experience in fights and Yuu’s self-defense training, they wiped the floor with the two delinquents.

Delinquent A: T-these two are straight-up mad! That wasn’t just six hits! Lair!

Yuu: OH! So you want some more huh!?

Delinquent B: Let’s get the he!! out of here! I’m sorry to all chickens!

Deuce: Apologize 100 times next you eat eggs! Dumb@$$e$!!

Grim: Wow!

Deuce: Huff, huff… Ugh!!

Grim: What just happened?

Deuce: …I screwed up… I vowed that I would definitely be a honor student this time…! In middle school, all I ever did was screw around… I constantly skipped school and spent my day getting into fights. I disrespected my teachers, hung around sketchy upperclassman, and bleached my hair to death. Even ran around all over the place riding a magical wheel. I was a terrible person that went as far as to use magic to lord over those that couldn’t.

Grim: Just now you went full on bad boy on those guys!

Deuce: Then one night... I saw my mom hiding away in tears as she called my grandma. "Was the I raised him wrong? Would it have been better if he had both parents?" She was wrong. Mom never did anything wrong. It was all me! So when the carriage from Night Raven College came to get me... My mom was so happy and I don't want to make her cry again. This time. I'm going to be an honor student my mom can be proud of. Then I do this... $hit!

Grim: But, y'know... Does being an honor student mean you have to grin and bare everything?

Deuce: Huh?

Grim: Those delinquents deserved another 10 punches if you ask me! You and Yuu fought them off before I could, though.

Yuu: I think that your mom would be proud that you are trying to be a better student. In my eyes, you are doing a lot better than back then.

Deuce: You guys...

Yuu: Even honor students get mad too.

Deuce: Really? ...Heh heh. May those baby chicks rest in peace.

Yuu: There is something that I need to tell you.

Deuce: What do you mean?

Yuu: The eggs that we bought will never turn into chicks as they were never fertilized.

Deuce: WHAT?!? You've gotta be kidding!?

Back at the kitchen, they gave the ingredients to Trey who then proceeded to finish making the tart. Which turned out to be amazing and looked really good.

Ace: Did something happen while you were out shopping?

Yuu: Chick shock...

Deuce: For 16 years... I believed that...

Ace: Making sweets takes so much time. I'm exhausted...

Cater: Good work! Is the tart finished? The decorations look super cute! It's totally magicam-gramble! Let me take a pic.

Ace: Ah! What'd you come here for?

Cater: I came by to check on my cute underclassmen, working so hard. Ahaha, you look beat!

Trey: Things you aren't used to tire you out quick. So when you're tired you need to eat something sweet. Go ahead and try the mont blanc we made.

Everyone: Yay!

Yuu: Are you sure?

Trey: It's fine.

Ace: Cater, you did come here just in time to eat the tart!

Yuu: Almost like you planned it.

Cater: Just a coincidence I promise.

Grim: Waaahaaa... It smells so deliciously sweet. The chestnuts on top are glossy while the cream underneath is so fluffy! Let's eat!

Yuu: Please don't eat it all. We still need a tart for the Unbirthday Party.

Grim: I know

Ace: Ah! Holy crap!

Cater: So good!

Deuce: Amazing... It's like what you get in stores.

Grim: It's not overly sweet but still has a richness to it! It's like a garden of chestnuts in my mouth!

Yuu: It's amazing! I definitely think that Riddle will love this.

Trey: Thank you.

Cater: Oh yeah. Hey Trey, do the thing.

Trey: The thing? ...Oh, that. So what are your favorite foods?

Ace: Mine's cherry pie and hamburgers.

Grim: My number one is canned tuna. And cheese omurice, and grilled meat, and pudding!

Deuce: If I have to pick, omurice, I guess.

Yuu: Mine would have to be breaded shrimp.

Cater: And mine is grilled lamb with diablo sauce.

Trey: Alright here we go, ... Doodle Suit!

There was a sound, a flash, and then nothing.

Deuce: ...? This is?

Trey: Now take another bite of the mont blanc.

Ace: Hm? Hmmmmm? This is... mont blanc but it tastes like cherry pie!

Grim: It tastes like canned tuna! *Chomp chomp* Ohh, now it's cheese omurice! And grilled chicken, *munch munch*, and pudding!

Yuu: Wow! It really does taste like breaded shrimp!

Cater: Isn't it fun? If you did this while having tea with a girl, they'd be super impressed!

Deuce: It's amazing. Is changing the flavor of food your unique magic, Trey?

Trey: Actually, it's magic that "overwrites a component". So not just taste, but I can also overwrite the color or scent or really anything. The overwrite only lasts a short time so that's why it's like a doodle or scribble. That's why I've named this magic "doodle" since it's not permanent.

Grim: With your "Doodle Suit" my dream of all you can eat canned tuna isn't just a dream. It's so much better than the magic Riddle uses to bully people.

Trey: No... My magic is nothing more than child's play when compared to Riddle's He's on a different level. ...It's getting late. Let's go home and give Riddle the tart tomorrow. Tomorrow is the Unbirthday Party. Don't be late.

Yuu: Hang on. Do you have a book of the rules?

Trey: Yeah, why?

Yuu: I want to make sure that there is nothing against a mont blanc at an Unbirthday Party.

Cater: Good thinking Yuu.

Ace: So, did you find anything Yuu?

Yuu: Here we are. Rule Number 562: Refrain from bringing marron tarts for the Unbirthday Party."

Trey: Wow, I almost missed that one. Good thing Yuu double-checked the rules.

Yuu: It's kinda a talent of mine. Knowing the rules and when a rule applies to a situation or not. It's weird, I know.

Cater: Far from it. If you hadn't checked then Riddle would have most likely been furious.

Ace: Yuu, I owe you one.

Yuu: Then I think that we should keep the tart in the kitchen, explain ourselves to Riddle and hope that he takes the collar off of Ace.

Ace: One more thing. Yuu, can you let me sleep over again? My cruel upperclassmen aren't going to let me in the dorm!

Cater: Wow. So prickly!

Deuce: Ace, don't force Yuu to spoil you too much.

Grim: Yeah! You gotta pay to stay! 10 cans of tuna!

Ace: What! Are you telling me to sleep outside?

Yuu: No, no. Ace, you can stay but now you owe me two favors.

Ace: Fine by me! Thank Yuu!

Trey: Deuce, why don't you stay in their dorm to keep an eye on Ace? As the vice dorm leader, I give you permission.

Cater: Trey, aren't you spoiling the newbies. I'm jelly. Yuu, can I go too?

Yuu: I don't think so. The dorm needs some intense TLC and I'm pretty sure that you're needed in the dorm.

Cater: Tch. Bringin' me down.

Trey: Yuu, I'm sorry about forcing those two on you. We're counting on you tomorrow.

Yuu: It's fine and I will be sure that they are on their best behavior tomorrow.

Ace: Tomorrow is the Unbirthday Party. This damn collar is definitely coming off! Just you watch, Riddle.

As Yuu, Ace, Grim, and Deuce made their way to the dorm Yuu coudn't help but feel as if something was very wrong in the dorm. And that Riddle was in great danger, but from what?

That is where I will end this chapter and the next will continue to the morning of the Unbirthday Party. Until then, hope everyone is doing ok.

[unrelatedpostsetc]

Crap spamton drawings in my assignment book. I don’t know how to draw but who give a shit. more disorganized thoughts below the cut. Image ID in alt text and below cut. The ID also sucks - I’m trying to get better, so feel free to send an ask if you have any advice on that front.

I don’t care that Mettaton never got famous in this universe - I’m just making shit up. Anyway, I think Spamton would have been a big fan of Mettaton’s shows, not least evidenced by the fact that he plagiarized the guy’s cool robot body design. I also think he would snore loud as hell. The colored image (the one that’s not in pencil) is based on an actual spam email I received, although they were trying to get me to buy ethereum instead. Also, I’m aware this sucks. I drew most of these in like 12 seconds at 3 am, I haven’t drawn in years, and I never really learned how. I do take good-faith criticism.

edit: I’m adding the alt text here, just in case it doesn’t work. It’s super long because I can’t summarize to save my life. Sorry about that. [ID 1: assorted pencil doodles of Spamton (see next ID for description of him) in an assignment book. From left to right and top to bottom: unshaded (all white) drawing of him saying “bro”. Him grinning. Him face down on the floor, captioned “(splanched)”. Him sitting next to and leaning his head on a drawing of mettaton (from undertale), saying “oh mettaton we’re really in it now”. This and the two subsequent drawings are dated 08/10/21. Him with blacked-out glasses, then with huge cartoony pupils. Him hanging from strings, saying “whadda [hell]”. Him, with spirals going two different ways on his glasses and a more disproportionately large head than usual, saying (in caps) “[hot $ingles in [[your]] area now]”. Him with just the top of his head and arms peeking over a wall. Him lying on the floor again. Him, looking sweaty and nervous, with motion lines added to indicate that he’s moving forward and hitting himself in the chest, captioned “pacing and thumping chest” and “this guy sucks”. Final doodle has its own image (refer to ID 3). End ID. ] [ID 2: a drawing of Spamton, a white puppet-looking character with a long, pointy nose, large teeth, and a small body. He has slicked-back black hair that resembles a mullet. He is wearing a black v-neck sweater and glasses with one pink and one yellow lens, and has red spots on his cheeks. The image text reads (in caps) “9938 free [[kromer]] click [h3re]”. End ID.] [ID 3: pencil doodles of Spamton in an assignment book, dated 16/10/21. A wiggly vertical line separates the two drawings. In the first drawing, Spamton is sitting on a pile of nondescript lumps labeled “trash”. He is watching a video on a smartphone, which is emitting the text “Welcome back to ‘Cooking With a Killer Robot’”. He looks sad, or maybe thoughtful, and is thinking “wish I’d learned to cook”. In the second drawing, Spamton is lying on his side on more nondescript lumps, also labeled “trash”. His glasses are blacked out and his mouth is wide open. One arm is stretched out in front of him and the other is folded over his chest; his knees are slightly bent. The drawing is captioned “*extremely loud radio static*”. End ID.]

[awoken-artist]

🌸🍡Please don't resubmit/repost my works without my permission! thanks!🍡🌸

Continuing on with my sketch dumps of my FMA artworks with my FMA OC and other canon characters! :3 I had fun doing these doodles, I plan to do more and get on with my FMA comic so yes-

I shall talk about each of these sketches! ^u^

^^

timeline in the FMA Manga and brotherhood where Rose takes Winry in when they arrived in Lior. So in my story Emmy had tagged along with Winry and the others. Rose takes both Winry and Emmy in, Winry and Emmy take turns using the bath to get refreshed, which i would draw a scene where when Emmy was taking a bath she's been pretty zoned out somewhat. Winry does notice and would talk to her as they start having a connection with each other as they rarely do at times. of course after the bath Rose talks to the two and have a suspicion both Winry and Emmy have a thing for Edward and when Winry notices Emmy does indeed have a crush on Edward, she cant help tease her and admits she has been around Edward so much so this only gives both Winry and rose the opportunity to have her spill the tea. even spill out and admit she has a crush- which she did...they broke her to admit it as she broke even more being extremely flustered. aaah girl talks XD

^^

scene from the manga and brotherhood where you know- Ed was hiding in Winry room to have some privacy...yeah that scene. so after Winry screamed and that whole fiasco with the guys wondering wtf is going on- Emmy does rush over and see the guys blocking the door and sees Winry handling them and jumped out of the way to not get smacked by the guys getting their asses beaten. Emmy does get back up and wonders what's going on and sees Ed. which Ed is relieved both Winry and Emmy are safe. of course Emmy tries her best not to cry which- can easily see she's about to but instead of bawling or crying at all- she gets mad because she was worried sick. she storms over and grabs him by the shirt and shaking him "WHERE WERE YOU DO YOU EVEN FUCKING REALIZE HOW WORRIED WE ALL ARE?!" and Ed was just surprised how mad he made Emmy and tried to calm her down which she does calm down and tries not to cry which- Ed told her she can let it out. which she does. Winry helps with comforting her as well and told Ed that he made her really worry about him after hearing about the incident with the mines from envy which.. Ed wasn't sure if he even should mention what happened. [didn't drew the scene but it'll happen in my FMA comic...yeah uh Ed actually does tell Emmy what happened in the mines and of course gets an emotional earful from her. which- he doesn't fault her for getting upset..]

^^ Last one is aha...yeah Emmy with her cousin Autumn...who she hates the ever loving crap of. Emmy has a nasty history with her cousin, because her cousin is nothing but a very spoiled brat who her parents spoil on even autumns siblings, and lets autumn do whatever she wants. [worse is the Aunt absolutely cannot stand Emmy due to having a unpleasant view of her and her mother. Basically the Aunt is like a "Karen" kind of person, with holly thou attitude, not to mention - the aunt doesn't like Emmy and Emmet's mom because she and her parents are from another country....yeah she's- she's that kind of person, and of course- spreads that to their own kids. :/ she's that bitch] so yeah Emmy has a nasty history with Autumn when she was younger, even one where it crossed the line to the point the family doesn't want anything to do with the aunt and uncle anymore, not even the kids because it went way too far. Basically Autumn was left alone with her siblings and with Emmy, Emmy was very young about age 3-4 and autumn decided to get the scissors and cut her hair making Emmy very upset telling her to stop and anytime Emmy would yell at her begging for her to stop autumn would cut her with the scissors trying to silence her but she wont stop crying. the cuts only making her want to cry MORE. of course this made autumn get very frustrated and would slap her, even make threats to cut her neck if she doesn't shut up which- at that point Emmet saw what happened and rushed to pull the scissors away and throw it across the room and take Emmy in his arms very angry and tells her "I'm telling my parents!". of course autumn tries manipulating by saying he's being a tattle tail and whatever, which Emmet doesn't care and tells her that his parents told him that if ANYTHING happens, he should tell them. even when in danger, and he runs to get his parents attention and luck happens that the family was pissed. autumn tried to play the innocent angel card but the other family members don't fall for it. make it worse that autumn had marks from using the scissors and has some blood on her. not a lot but droplets. proof enough.  Yeah id go into more on how the "reunion" of these two happen but- that'll be either a future doodle or when the comic gets worked on and we get to that point. let me say it gets worse...and....creepy might i add... eck..

🌸🍡---------------------------------------------------------🍡🌸

🍡Artwork and my FMA OCs is owned by: @awoken-artist

🌸Fullmetal Alchemist and Edward Elric is owned by: Hiromu Arakawa

🍡Programs Used: Clip Studio Paint EX

[caitlyn-winchester]

Pilot (Part 2)

Cordell Walker x daughter!Reader

word count: 1,554

warnings: dead parent, abandonment?, mentions of deportation

A.N. sorry I haven't been that active about updating this story. I had some school assignments to complete(and still do). this past week I just been very unmotivated to do anything. I'll try to post more! Thank u for your patience.

masterlist

“What are we doing out here again?” Bel asked me as we hopped over a fence that led to an open field.

“Just looking at the stars, I guess. My mom used to take me out here all the time, especially on a full moon.” I told her, sitting down on the grass

“Full moon, like tonight.” she realized.

“Yeah.” I pulled out my leather-bound sketchbook and markers. “She let me draw the starscape while she took some pictures on her camera. I've drawn every single full moon since I was ten, I've missed a couple since she passed. The first couple of months were difficult to get myself to come out here. She even made this sketchbook” I explained. Bel put a comforting hand on my shoulder. I was so lucky to have her, she is an amazing friend.

“She sounds amazing Y/N. I wish I could meet her.” She said and I just nodded. “Can I see your drawings?”

“Sure.” I handed her the book and she started to flip through the pages

“You're really good” she complimented

“Thanks.” I gave a small smile. I layed down on the grass and looked at the stars. It's been a little while and we’ve been talking, looking at the stars or I've been doodling the sky. We heard hard footsteps in the distance and looked over to see someone running in our direction. “What the hell? I breathed out and sat up. As the person got closer I recognized the person. It’s Ryan Marshall from school.

“Ryan?” Bel said when he was just about to pass us but he stopped when he heard his name.

“Hey guys!” he slurred. I rolled my eyes, great he’s drunk.

“Hey! You! Stop!” We heard from the same direction Ryan came from. Two police officers came running over and Ryan took off again. One police officer continued to chase ryan but the other stopped and looked at us.

“What are you ladies doing out here? Were y’all also at that party down the block.” he asked us pointing a flashlight at us. I put my hand out to block my eyes. Does he really gotta shine that thing directly in my face?

“No sir, we were just stargazing. We never stepped foot in that party. You can test us if you'd like.” I explained and Bel agreed with my statement.

“No, you guys don't seem drunk or anything. But you are trespassing.” he told us.

“Trespassing? I thought this was a public field.” I blurted.

“Last month this field was issued for game only during this season. You can only be on this field if you have a hunting license.” he explained “I’ll have to take you into the station for trespassing.”

“Can’t you let us off with a warning? We had no idea and you have no signs up!” I jabbed

“Sorry missy its protocol.” He read us our rights and asked us if we had any weapons and all the other police crap that's part of their ‘protocol’.

»»————-　★　————-««

Currently we are at the police station waiting for our parents to pick us up. Bel told me about her parents and how they might get deported since she was brought in. I feel terrible, I has no idea they changed the field over for a stupid game season. Just another thing I messed up. Luckily Stan Morrison was able to drop our charges since I explained exactly what happened and he understood. Unfortunately, we were taking in so our parents must pick us up since we are minors. We were waiting for probably a good thirty minutes when I saw my dad round the corner. I’m shocked he actually showed up, that’s a new one. I do really want to jump up and hug him but something in me is just mad at him for leaving us so I can’t bring myself to. Also being picked up at a police station was not my ideal first meeting of my dad after his absence.

“And here he is to save the day” I say under my breath.

“Good to see you too.” He said and approached us.

“Dad, this is Bel. Can we take her home?” I asked him.

“No. minors have to be picked up by their parents.”

“Well i’m not just leaving her here.”

“Then you can stay in a cell here tonight.”

Bel’s parents enter the police station. Dad takes his hat off and approaches them.

“It’s good to meet ya’ll. I've been out of town for a while so I don't really know Y/N’s social life. We should spend some time together.” he says.

“Stop it.” I whisper. He can't be serious right now.

“...Seems like the girls got into some trouble tonight so maybe we could help each other out.” he explains. Bella’s parents don't say anything as another police officer calls them back.

“Epic first meeting.” Bel sighs.

“I’m sorry, this is so embarrassing.” I apologize for my dad’s actions.

“For who? Lets go.” Dad shot at me and I just rolled my eyes. I grabbed my sketchbook off the seat and gave Bel a quick hug before leaving the station with my dad.

»»————-　★　————-««

The car ride home was an awkward one. Like what do I even say to him? ‘Nice to finally see you again after you abandoned us for almost a year’ I don't think that's the nicest thing to say. I felt sweet relief when I saw us pull up to my grandparents house. I took off my seat belt and opened the car door.

“Y/N,” dad warned. I stopped opening the door and started fidgeting with the edge of my sketchbook. “Want to tell me what the hell you were thinking?”

“I didn't know we were trespassing. There was no sign or anything to tell us pedestrians were not allowed on the field. Apparently they recently changed it or something, I don't know. Mom used to take me out to that field all the time. I didn't think anything of it.” I explained. He nodded in understanding.

“It's still dangerous. What if a hunter thought you were a deer and shot you? I don't like you out alone. I know you had Bel with you, but there's some bad people out there that can overpower you guys. I’d rather you be home for dinner with your family at night.” He told me.

“Oh like how you were home for dinner last night?” I challenged and he sighed. “Mom said you'd never be on a case too long.” I remarked.

“And I never meant to be.” dad said and I shook my head in disbelief. “This last case...it got complicated.” he explained.

“Complicated?” I scoffed. “A five minute phone call this summer, then nothing for three months! It’s bad enough we didn't have mom” I pointed out.

“We both gotta stop acting like she's going to come back.” he stated. I jumped out of the car and burst into tears. Uncle Liam was outside now and he tried to reach out to me but I ignored him. August was right in the living room when I entered the house.

“Y/N? What's wrong? What happened? Where’s dad” he asked me.

“Its nothing August. Just leave it alone.” I sniffed, trying my best to contain myself for my brother’s sake.

“Why were you at the police station? I thought you were just going to yours and mom’s spot?” he nagged on.

“I did. It's some kind of hunting ground now, you can’t go on it without a hunting license. You done with the twenty questions?” I snapped.

“Y/N, want to come have some leftovers?” my grandma asked me. Well she technically asked but she was actually telling me to get my ass over there.

“Sure Grams” I sighed and sat down by the kitchen island. She put down a plate of her famous pot roast and I dug in. While I ate she was cleaning up the kitchen.

“You’re not going to ask me what I did?” I inquired.

“No, because I know you’re a good, smart kid and you wouldn't do anything too damaging on purpose.” She offered me a kind smile. “Plus I know what tonight is with the full moon. I can put two and two together.” she laughed. Uncle Liam and dad walked in the house but I didn't hear them enter so I continued talking.

“Last month, they changed the field for ‘game hunting only’. I had no idea, so Bel and I got charged for trespassing. I can’t go out to that field anymore. Now I feel like another piece of mom is gone.” I confessed tears welling up in my eyes again.

“You can still go draw the stars, I know your mom would love for you to keep doing y'all's traditions. I'll even go out with you.” she offered.

“Thanks Grandma. I appreciate it, I really do, but it just wouldn't be the same.” I sighed.

“Not many things are going to be the same, Y/N.” she stated.

“I miss her so much.” I started sobbing. Grandma rounded the island and pulled me into a hug.

“I know you do sweetie.” she consoled, rubbing her hand in circles on my back, trying her best to comfort me.

A.N. sorry if you don't like to draw. Emily seemed like the type of parent that liked her kids to be creative, like August and photography. So I figured drawing could be what the reader and Emily did together. 

PART 3 OUT NOW

[fainthedcherry]

MY ARTFIGHT ATTACKS OF THIS YEAR SO FAR!!!! I planned to attack more but...This is the first year I actually like- actively am getting attacked OUTSIDE of my mutuals! Which IS exciting but- at the same time as you can tell...I don't have time to attack people in result omg xD

The first drawing, the character Natsuki, belongs to YoyoyoRiooo on Insta and AF!

The second drawing, the Zora Legzonie, belongs to @meatdog on AF and Tumblr here! (I believe this is their tumblr as the link was scuffed on AF and had to retype it properly and hope this IS their blog LOL) (BTW, this drawing was referenced off weird stock images.)

The graph-paper'd doodles, Calypso, Hazel, Sunflower ALL belong to Luna-Lazuli on DA, TH and AF!!!

I've been revenge-chaining like 4 diff users with no joke, so I got 0 time to think of what to type here otherwise LMFAO

I don't wanna yap too much in this desc, as I'm mega-busy and trying to avenge 4 diff drawings in under 3 days isn't easy for me xD. The 2nd attack here of the zora, was an attack I've drawn tuesday I think, and then wednesday-friday I got 4 ATTACKS AGAIN- SO YEAH I'M AS WE SPEAK SKETCHING THE 4TH REVENGE DRAWING (final one actually for said Yoyoyo person, as it'll be the only characters left, that I haven't drawn of theirs!)

BUT- I can mention, that I loved doing something new again via combining pencils and markers!! I didn't really- like do it “symbiotically” if that makes sense? But yeah, in these drawings the pencils played a much more active role in me pulling off some things with shading or reflections! I got more polychromos, which means, I can combine more and more of the 2 in the future! I can't wait to have more time to draw traditionally though...I might crank back on revenges next year bc I just this year simply had so little time for it

I STILL wish for a 300-Ohuhu set to magically appear in front of my doorstep though some day. A delulu guy can dream! 🥴

BUT YEAH!!! HERE'S PROOF THAT I STILL EXIST!!!! I SHALL SCHEDULE A POST FOR TOMORROW,, WHERE YOU CAN SEE MY 4 REVENGES,,, AND IF I FINISH IN TIME I'LL ADD THE OTHER 4.

YES THIS IS THE 2ND TIME I'M DRAWING 4 REVENGES. THAT MAKES 8 REVENGES. 5 ATTACKS THIS YEAR. I'M TBH PROUD OF MY RATIO THO. I for YEARS wanted to make 10 drawings in the time of AF. BC I'm such a slow artist, this is actually a MASSIVE achievement for me. 😭✨

I HOPE TO PROPERLY CATCH UP ON MY SOCIAL MEDIA SOON THOUGH. I have SO much crap to reply to and SO much to respond to and do in GENERAL with my social medias. I made a Cara acc to get off Insta as an artist officially, so YEAH....Praying things work out and I stay off any social medias planning to use AI algos that feed off posts. We as artists are not safe anymore everywhere unfortunately.. :")

But I'm hopeful, this'll die out in a few years...

[diyunho]

The Joker x Reader - “Trapped” Part 5

Almost one year ago, someone tried to kill The Joker in a speeding car and Y/N pushed him out of the way, getting hit instead. With a fractured skull and broken bones, she was out of business for 6 months; when she finally recovered, The Queen of Gotham wasn’t the same anymore. Trapped inside her own mind and exhibiting severe cognitive impairment, Y/N’s life switched upside down without any hope of ever returning to normal.

Part 1    Part 2    Part 3    Part 4

4 Months Pregnant

“I need customized stickers that say Baby On Board for my purple Lamborghini and the other cars I drive,” The Joker growls at his own idea whilst sharing it with the person fulfilling his wacko trades: Franco Rossi, the leader of best underground supply chain in Gotham.

“When would you like them ready Mister J? After Y/N gives birth?”

“Nope! Tomorrow.”

“Tomorrow?...” Franco hesitantly inquiries about the sudden emergency since he can’t understand why The King of Gotham demands them so fast.

The Joker hates explaining yet certain people are obtuse thus they necessitate enlightenment.

“Y/N’s pregnant: when she gets in a car, the baby is also. Baby on board! Hello??” the father-to-be loses his temper.

Who can argue with The Joker’s logic? Nobody. It sort of makes sense anyway.

“Of course, Mister J. I’ll have them ready. If you drop by after 6pm, I’ll have your guns ready too.”

“Perfect!” the Joker hangs up among the ruckus coming from the office near the kitchen: sounds of shattered objects and yelling alert Richard aka Panda you’re at it again. He nonchalantly passes by in order to deliver the items to The Clown.  

“Your drinks Mister J,” he gives one cup with Starbucks caramel latte to his boss and the other is placed on the table. Why does your boyfriend require 2 identical containers? It won’t take long to solve the mystery.

“Are the lids glued?”

Strange question but there’s a purpose in it.

“Yes sir. How is she doing?”

“She’s hormonal: breaking things makes her feel better which reminds me we have to hoard porcelain objects for her to wreck. NO glass!”

“Sure, I’ll tell the crew,” Richard leaves the kitchen while texting Frost. “Hulk needs more to smash,” he types the code name they gave you in the last weeks although The King knows about it: J’s the one that came up with it.

“Hey Pumpkin,” you are greeted as soon as you pop up from the office. “How’d it go?” he scrolls down on his phone and takes a sip of hot liquid.

“Ugghh!” a frustrated Y/N swings the yellow teddy bear The Joker stole for her on their first date, hitting his hand in the process. The drink flies near the fridge and splatters on the floor with minimal damage: only a tiny puddle instead of a disaster, that’s why the lids are glued.

Safety measure for The Queen’s unpredictability.

J grabs his reserve cup of coffee, paying attention now hence he dodges your renewed attack and keeps his coffee intact.

That’s why his drinks have the lids glued, in case you catch him off guard the second time it will result in negligible destruction.

It happened before.

“I don’t think so Princess,” The Joker strong grip on the container calms you a bit because you won’t be able to win this round. “Are you hungry?”

“No,” you pout and sit in his lap.

“I bet the baby is,” the secret weapon is unleashed: J discovered such a gem by accident and it works like a charm. How can Y/N say “no” if the baby is involved? She can’t.

A plate filled with a bunch of your favorite breakfast food is placed in front of you and strangely enough you’re instantly hungry.

“Extra bacon,” he purrs. “Plus chocolate dip and honey mustard for your pickled cherries. I added peanut butter olives as a bonus.”

In your defense, you’ve been having weird cravings lately.

You place the toy on the chair nearby and start eating, ogling a Joker texting back and forth with his business partners. He chews the morsel you just offered and shivers: waffle dipped in clam juice is disgusting. Maybe he should look at the food you shove in his mouth.

“Gross,” J washes the terrible taste with coffee and gets a kiss for encouragement, yet he’s aware of the connotations. Another kiss confirms it.

Let’s put it this way: besides the hormonal episodes and food demands, The Queen has had a fresh type of craving recently - The Joker kind.

More than usually.

That’s why he has to clear it up.

“I’m flattered for being the center of attention; we gotta keep in mind that contrary to the popular belief, I don’t have unlimited stamina, Pumpkin.”

You nod in agreement and unbutton his pants, then unzip them also.

“Y/N, pay attention!” J insists since you don’t give a damn about his woes. “Think about it as a two way street: The Joker Street and I Want To Break Things Street. Are you with me so far?” he double checks.

Why is he yapping so much??! I guess you should make an effort to comprehend: he’s even doodling patterns on his phone to emphasize the speech.

“When you get hormonal, Princess, let’s try and walk on the I Want To Break Things Street instead of The Joker Street, hm? The Joker Street is sometimes closed for repairs until further announcement.”

OK, OK, this is a lecture. Something about a Joker Street, he seems upset he doesn’t have one…?... Right?...

If you were him, you would be pissed Gotham didn’t name a street in your honor when you’re so important for the town.

Another peck on his neck, then your lips go down his collar bone.

“You’re not paying attention, are you?” J mutters when it’s clear his shirt won’t remain on his body for too long.

“I am,” you defend yourself.

“Oh yeah? What did I say then?”

“Ummm…” you try to piece together words among estrogen taking over. “No Joker Street?...”

“Bingo, that’s it Princess! No Joker Street, correct! Choose the other street, yes?”

This time he kisses you, excited his idea was well received when in fact, both parties are referring to unrelated concepts.

“Wait,” J dodges your touch, “Richard is calling.”

Because he’s on the phone ignoring Y/N, she is ensuring a nice surprise for later; concentrating to the maximum to avoid misspelling, the following message is sent to Franco Rossi from her cell:

“Make a landmark sign that says Joker Street.”

The King’s conversation is prolonged more than anticipated until he discerns you’re not wiggling: you feel asleep, softly snoring on his shoulder and he definitely can’t afford to wake you up.

The doctors said your body is trying to cope with the pregnancy the best way it can: if you doze off at random hours it means you ran out of fuel and you should rest. After cheating death and surviving the accident, the future mother is at high risk of serious complications which is why each day could lead to unforeseen problems.

The Joker rises from the chair holding you in his arms and after a few steps he realizes it’s difficult to walk: thanks to his unbuttoned and unzipped pants, they keep sliding lower and lower. There’s no way he will make it upstairs so maybe the sofa in the living room is the best option. He almost trips thus he begins to drag his feet on the carpet, the pants at knee level now.

“I’m reduced to a piece of meat,” J grumbles, finally making it to the couch and placing Y/N on it so she can have her power nap.

*************

6:02pm

You accompanied The King to a meeting with Seraphim, the best hacker/strategist J uses: they’ve been plotting for a while concerning D.A. Kevin Winchester. The politician is becoming a huge pain in the butt for Gotham’s underworld and something must be done; either annihilation or blackmail, it truly doesn’t matter since he’s bad for business. Due to a total lack of interest in the subject, you are exploring the surroundings quite angry The Joker dragged you here.

Luckily there’s stuff to do.

Bam! you punch the fragile glass sculpture and it splinters into a million pieces on the lavish marble floor.

Seraphim jumps at the noise, immediately recognizing his beloved possession:

“That’s…,” he gulps, appalled. “That’s a Vitriol!”

Yup, the one and only Degas Vitriol, the latest sensation taking the art universe by storm.

“She’s hormonal,” J sneers. “She breaks shit!”

“That’s valued at 150,000 dollars!” the hacker breaths in much needed oxygen regarding the atrocity unfolding at his hideout.

“So??!!” your boyfriend sucks on his teeth, irritated. “Serves you right for buying that asshole’s artsy fartsy crap!”

The Joker actually has 4 Vitriol masterpieces at the mansion yet you were strictly forbidden to destroy them, alas he gave you the office for your rampages.

You continue your exploration as they talk about God knows what until you perceive an alarming detail: Seraphim is literally screaming having a gun pointed at J.

You sneak behind him then in a split second you strike the pistol out of his hand and your fist lands on his temple with such brutality it knocks him out unconscious.

“What the hell are you doing, Y/N???” The Clown hisses at your erratic behavior.

“Hm?”

“What are you doing??!!!” he repeats, annoyed.

“S-saving  you…,” you stutter, confused on why J is mad. “He was yelling and…mmm, had a gun,” you wince in pain because your knuckles hurt from the impact.

“The guy’s half deaf and sometimes he raises his voice without noticing, or did you forget??!! Now I have to wait until he comes to his senses and that’s a waste of my time, Y/N!!! Seraphim wasn’t threatening me, he was showing me his newest collectible!!! I suppose someone with half a brain can’t acknowledge the mess they’ve created!!!”

A lot of accusations thrown your way still… the last sentence brings tears in your eyes.

“I…” you bite your lower lip. “…I don’t have half of brain…”

“Wanna bet??” The Joker bites more instead of leveling with your logic: you though he was in danger and took action. If it was a real emergency, yes, you would have been the hero; it’s not and apparently he can’t appreciate your fast intervention in these circumstances.

“Y-you’re stupid…” you whisper, frustrated. “You don’t understand anything…”

Here it is -- the cataclysmic event of the century: someone called The Joker stupid. He’s beyond outraged with nothing better to utter besides a very childish:

“You’re stupid!”

Y/N turns around and stomps out of the house leaving a trail of destruction outside: she slaps the bottled water out of The Shark’s hand, kicks Panda’s shin and snatches Frost’s donut basically inhaling the sweet treat.

“I want to go h-home!!” you shout and enter the first vehicle you see, slamming the door so hard the window on the passenger side cracks.

“Jesus…” Jonny mumbles and being the sensible man that he is you are offered the whole box of pastries he purchased for his family. He can acquire more, but there’s no way in hell he wants to endure Y/N in the state she’s in.

Gotta keep Hulk calm somehow…

**************

3 Hours Afterwards

You sulk when The Joker strolls in the master bathroom frantically searching the cabinets.

“Did you see my shaver?” he asks.

“Hm?”

“Did you see my shaver?”

“I…I wouldn’t know. I only have half a brain,” the surprisingly eloquent phrase queues J his woman is holding a grudge for his earlier statement. Why wouldn’t she? He was a complete jerk.

At least you didn’t catch on to the obvious: The King of Gotham doesn’t own a shaver; hair just grows on his head.  

He glimpses at Y/N soaking in the bathtub with a kid’s book in her left hand and the right hand fingers sunk into a bowl filled with ice placed at the edge of the Jacuzzi. The Joker leans over and switches your book since it’s upside down.

You huff at the unwanted help and stare at the pictures expecting he’ll look for his shaver and disappear.

You’re not that fortunate today.

“Imagine my surprise when I drove the main alley and detected a sign that says The Joker Street,” he brings up the topic.

Franco Rossi was super-efficient …sadly you ordered the item before J ran his mouth at the hacker’s place, otherwise you wouldn’t care he wants a street with his name.

“You said no… no Joker Street,” you stammer. “Now you have one,” the bitter tone makes him roll his eyes: Y/N’s brain got what it could from his monologue, he should have known better than to make it complicated.

“Excellent…” The King starts rubbing your tummy, “… precisely what I was aiming for. I’m washing the baby, not you!” he underlines when you move farther from him.

You scrunch your face displeased but let him do it because it’s for the baby.

“I know what you’re doing,” Y/N gives him a cold gaze. “U-using the baby… I’m not stupid!”

Busted, The Joker thinks. The schemer in him won’t accept defeat though.

“I didn’t say you were.”

“Yes you did!”

“You said it first!!!” he reckons, antagonized. “Therefore two stupid people put together gotta make up for a smart one!!’

“I… I don’t wanna make out…” you frown at his suggestion.

The Joker sighs, deciding not to correct the trajectory of your judgement; it sure sounds like an opportunity.

“Why not?”

“I’m tired and…and I h-hate you,” your heavy eyelids close.

“Both viable reasons, even if I have to admit you striking Seraphim like that got me quite worked up. He’s no small fry! I had to wait for one hour for him to recover; you got a mean punch, woman! The more I reflect on it, the hornier I get. Which reminds me, Pumpkin: guess what?... … … I’m hormonal too.”

No answer, Pumpkin’s out.

“Of course nobody gives a damn if I’m hormonal!” he complaints while grabbing you from the bathtub. You cling to him for a few moments prior to drifting back into your dreams.

“Thanks for getting me all wet,” J snarls at the cruel reality of having his favorite Prada suit ruined.

“You…you’re welcome…” his Queen replies in her sleep, somehow her mind clutching to reality amidst pure relaxation.

This is what two hormonal individuals are reduced to: one’s dozing off, the other is suffering in silence, although being the proud owner of the tiniest road in Gotham compensates for the mishap.

It’s a two way street.

 Also read: Masterlist

You can also follow me on Ao3 and Wattpad under the same blog name: DiYunho. 

[notafraidofredyellowandblue]

Rammstein radio interview Paul Landers 1997 - English translation

Gave the english translation a shot, as good and bad as I could make it out (if someone has corrections, please let me know). Paul is really on a roll in this interview and basically keeps on talking, sometimes rambling so far he has to backtrack to finish his story. I decided to keep the rambling part in, because it's actually part of the fun of hearing him talking 😊 (at the end are some footnotes with the translation).

Edited to add a couple of additions (outfit at first concert, what music he listens to incl footnote 4) thanks to @dinchenrockt 😘

--------------------

Voiceover: Rammstein, at the latest since this year not an insidertip anymore. Stefan Rieger has portrayed the group and interviewed one of the two guitarists, Paul.

Paul: Calling ourselves Rammstein was nonsense really, it was a bit like a nickname, like when  someone is nicknamed 'Dummy' *1) and no one knows why he is called 'Dummy' but everybody calls him 'Dummy', you know *2) someone will ask "Why are you called 'Dummy'?" It just got stuck like that, 'Rammstein'. And then we considered what to call ourselves: 'Milk' or 'Weir', 'Forest' but it all didn't sound quite right. 'Rammstein' just stuck. It had to do with a. that, b. with the force of the disaster itself, then with the force of the double 'm', then it had to do with the sound and also we think it describes the music really well.

VO: The Rammstein bandmembers are no novices in the musicbusiness. Most of them have been involved in various projects for years. Paul and Flake played for 12 years with east-berlin cult-group 'Feeling B'

P: We all had a band, every man for himself, a couple of guys played with 'Feeling B' and the bassplayer played with 'The Inchtabokatables' etcetera etcetera and parallel to these bands we fooled around in the basement and called that 'Rammstein'. That was like a sideproject. And after a while..eh..the individual bands broke up and we just did this sideproject which then wasn't a sideproject anymore and that was Rammstein. That's how it started and the first concert we ever played was at the NaTo to 15 people *3), and Till wore two sunglasses, no fireworks was set off, so it was quite peaceful, we wore black turtleneck sweaters.

VO: To 'The Inchtabokatables' singer B.Breuler Rammstein's succes is no coincidence.

B. Breuler: Good music, which uses german language and an interesting way of using their stuff with elements that weren't covered in the previous bands. Who else did those sampled guitars in german music, that is relatively new..

VO: Musical influences on Rammstein

P: I like no *4) music at all, Till likes dark, Flake listens to, he only has one cassettetape which has Johnny Cash on it, Schneider listens to Techno, Oliver listens to Industrial, the bassplayer, and Sven listens to whatever is new, that's all of us. Well all of us don't really have rolemodels, we just have rolemodels like 'Pantera', well not really rolemodels, we like them. I like music, no matter from which direction, it has to be individual. Last ones that were individual were 'Metallica', 'Pantera' and 'Prodigy' and such, the individual bands I know personally, apart from that there is some more stuff that's hot but not as groundbreaking. We are not really groundbreaking either, but there is some... I like it when music is individual, no matter where it's from. All of it influences us technically, or none of it.

VO: The Rammstein boom has reached unexpected dimensions. The in september 1995 published CD 'Herzeleid' is19th in the german salescharts. The single 'Engel' is 4th in the singlecharts and concerts are usually sold out.

P: Well no one believes us, and you don't believe it yourself, that it wasn't planned, that is, we did have a concept, but we didn't expect..we didn't want fame and we didn't want to be rich and we also didn't want in 'Bravo' *5), that is, we just wanted, or I wanted just to annoy, that was our main concern, fun at annoying people and nothing more. With 'Feeling B' everything always had to be fun, we just wanted to be wellbehaved and stuff, now we didn't want to behave, wanted to cause a little trouble, basically we did the opposite of what you should do to be succesful. We have really disgusting evil guitars, distorted, and played really slow, and did really disgusting lyrics which get to you, and then suddenly everyone think it is good. It's like you spit in a corner or Joseph Beuys *6) shits in a corner and everyone thinks it is good, that is, he probably also thought "Are these people crap?" that is, not that the people are shit, well maybe they are, but not because of this...ehm... I like that something that is really totally extreme...in the beginning we wanted to be just extreme, and now we have a nice succes with it, not that we mind that now or something...what I think is funny, was something I read today in a newspaper "The most hyped german band", well basically we are the exact opposite, that is, we are the most blocked german band, unfortunately nobody hyped us, MTV cancelled us immediately after we made a little stink there, Viva one time said "You shit band won't come to us", the magazine called 'Musik Expresse' didn't want to publish us, so unfortunately nobody hyped us. Just by simply blunt, dull being there we have achieved succes, but with succes comes pressure, when I think in hindsight where that comes from..from other directions, from directions you can't plan, that you can't... eh.. decide on yourself, that is, when you say "I want a pretty woman, who is clever, has a car and a spotted dog and so on".. you can't decide on that, you just have to wait who comes along.. A tip I can give to someone who wants to be famous, just choose music that is totally 'Out' and then persevere for 7 years...so totally..like 'Easy listening' or such, when you play 'Schlager' for 15 years, it will be modern again..

VO: Impossible to imagine Rammstein without the german lyrics, with extreme-sounding content that has led to excitement in some media that have only now discovered the group. That however has hardly damaged Rammstein. Another effect of the german lyrics is that fans can sing along with the songs in concerts. The seaman-song *7), for instance, the singer leaves to the audience almost completely, to that the keyboarder sways in a dinghy over the heads of the crowd, carried by many hands.

P: 'Seeman', for instance, was a joke, we were fooling around in the rehearsalroom and the bassplayer used this grip 'die-die-die die-die' and so on, and then Till in a pitiful way 'Come in my boat..' *8) and we all kneeled in the rehearsalroom, it was a gag, and then we played it three times and all thought it was good and then we thought "my god, the effect is so shit, let's just do it", so we are funny enough to just do it. With 'Feeling B', for instance, we weren't allowed to do funny stuff like that, that is, stuff that is actually embarassing, we weren't allowed to. The embarassing thing to go through the crowd with the dinghy is actually something people like, a bit like a circusact, 'Rock circus Rammstein invites', we did it one time, all yelled, we didn't know that.

VO: In the american movie 'Lost Highway' by David Lynch two Rammstein songs are used at key points. In connection to the movie, the mystical atmosphere of the songs particularly come to fruition.

P: At the time we wanted to shoot our first songs we sent a CD to all directors we liked for the musicvideo, and not video-directors but movie-directors, at which no one replied, and then, 3/4 year later a call came "Hello, this is.." in english that is "this is the productioncompany of David Lynch, for our next movie 'Lost highway' *9) we want to use 2 of your songs". Well, we thought "Nah, we don't want that, no, nope" then we said well why not and now it's like, how can I explain, it's like when you have a painting that no one knows, you think someone just made a little doodle on it and then people say "Ah no, that's a Picasso..", "Oh, so that's a *Picasso*, that's really great", you know? The same thing happens with us, which we think is funny, that Rammstein now means something because David Lynch likes it. And the importance that is created because of that, I think..well I don't understand it...to me it's like this...whoever makes somewhat interesting music that is individual, yes...eh..then something happens because of it, you know, that is, if I were an american I would like Rammstein too, because..at last something non-american, you know? They are happy because usually when someone comes over from Europe, it's always a band of which they have a better original at home, you know? In Europe you see few bands, well few individual bands, that is, when I go to Poland I would like to have a polish refrain in my metal song, and when I go to Russia, I want a distorted Balalaika or something, you know, I want to hear individual music and almost no one does that, and when someone does it.. *10)

VO: Current Rammstein single 'Engel' is the first extract from the CD 'Sehnsucht' which is due to be published in August. The part of the angel is performed by Bobo who came to fame with her band 'Bobo in White Wooden Houses'. Bobo's voice comes to fruition in the spherical and slightly melancholical content of the song.

P: Bobo is quite simply a friend of ours and ehm.. she was actually only intended to sing along to a few refrains, softly in the background and when she was warbling around in the studio we got the idea, let's, and before Till sang that part, do "Only when the clouds go to sleep, one can see them in the sky, they are afraid and are alone, God knows I don't want to be an angel" *11) we said "Bobo, why don't you sing 'Only when the clouds go to sleep, one can see *us* in the sky'" and so on, and she did, and she thought it was shit, said "No, I can't sing as sweet as that", because normally she sings..she sings more artistic and not that 'schlager'-like, you know, "Come on, sing really 'schlager' like a little angel" and she didn't want that either, that is, she didn't and most of the band didn't want it either, nobody wanted it, you know, nobody really liked it, we thought, because it sounded really silly *12) and then we thought "crap, let's leave it out" and then we put the part on mute, and then we thought "hmm", it was a bit like a cloud in front of the sun, it isn't as nice anymore, so we put the cloud away again and then it was nice again and then we simply kept it that way.

Translation notes:

*1) Paul uses the word 'Borstel' which can have more meanings, but in this case he is making a comparison with someone having a silly fictional nickname, so I went with 'Dummy'

*2) one of his often used Berliner expressions is 'Weeste', in official german this would be 'Weist du'; I translated it with 'you know'.

*3) more info on this first gig https://rammwiki.net/wiki/24.03.1994_(concert)

*4) I couldn't figure it out, but what he says is in Berlinisch 'jar keene', in german 'gar keine', meaning he doesn't like any music (somehow I think this is a very 'Paul' reply 😊)

*5) 'Bravo' is the largest teen magazine in Germany

*6) Paul mispronounces the name at first and corrects himself

*7) 'Seeman'

*8) 'Komm in mein Boot'

*9) Paul actually uses the german name 'Verlorene Landstrasse', took me a while to realise what he meant

*10) Here his sentence is cut off in the broadcast, I feel he said something after it..

*11) "Erst wenn die Wolken schlafen gehen, kann man sie am Himmel sehen, sie haben Angst und sind allein, Gott weiß ich will kein engel sein"

*12) Paul giggles at that 😊

[oh-theatre]

Livin’ It Up: Chapter 3

Chapter title: Its All Coming Back To Me Now

A/N: New, bad, sorry. Comment? Sorry for short, important.

words: 1340

summary: return 

pairings: Eventual logicality, eventual prinxiety, eventual demus, eventual Moceit (Which then goes back to Logicality and Demus)

warnings: Swearing, alcohol, underage drinking, drinking, parties, kissing, throw up, slight self harm, emotional abuse

Ao3 Link  

“Ugh of course he did” Virgil sighs, throwing his journal across the room. Patton giggles still scribbling away at his homework. Virgil sits up, rubbing the nape of his neck with sympathy in his eyes. “Im sorry Pat, i know you wanted...not that”

“Hey its ok! I gave it a shot, plus the night I had was fun” Patton admits, he shrugs away his thoughts but finds himself doodling in the corner of his calculus work. “This is pointless” He shut his book away, returning it neatly to its spot on his desk. “My brain cant focus” He threw his eraser towards Virgil “Tell me about Roman” He smirks.

“Ok look nothings happened since the party” Virgil tells, and Patton listens, well until Virgil begins to ramble about their theatre project. His mind was in too many places at once, and he loved Virgil but once his gushing ended and his worries set in, Patton couldn't focus. His mind wandered to that fateful night, under the amber lights of a bustling evening.

“But they're so sticky” Logan scrunched his face, watching Patton thank the shop tender for his caramel apple. Patton rolls his eyes with a playful smile.

“Delicious is the word you're looking for” He corrects, Logan still doubtful. “Come on, take a bite” he offers, holding it up. Hesitant at first, Logan eyes it, was he examining the apple? Oh god, the way his glasses sat on his nose practically falling, Patton swears he could hear his heartbeat.

“Alright” He says, he holds his glasses, Patton strengthens his hold as Logan takes a bite out of the delectable treat. Logan's eyes quickly fly open, a surprise as he chews.

“Congrats Moreno! You're one of us common folk now” Patton teases, the wind ruffling both of their hair. Logan nods, taking yet another bite, Patotn didn't mind, he found the small chipmunk like chewing adorable. “Come on Simon, there's more to show you” He jokes, Logan takes his hand allowing the cheerleader to guide him. The apple was gone quickly but neither minded, it made their commute easier.

Patton had to wonder if Logan had ever been outside however, every little new thing sparked him, the bored robotic look in his eyes disappeared with a new flicker of excitement. Patton adored it. He grew fond of how Logan would fiddle with his fingers, it was soft.

“Just ignore them” Logan whispered as the pair walked towards a more quiet spot.

“Hm?” Patton hummed in response, a small skip as the gravel crackled below their feet.

“The girls and guys staring, just ignore them” And Patton had been. It was hard not to notice, each with daggers in their eyes but even if tonight was just a one time thing, or whatnot Patton was here to enjoy himself, enjoy the carnival he had spent weeks preparing and try something new. And it was nice, even if he did notice the winks Logan would throw out, the boredom as Patton chatted with people and the constant phone checking.

Its nice

It was nice

“So now im like i don't know! Should I dye my hair!” Virgil finishes, Patton coughs away his thoughts.

“I might have adhd but you can really go down a rabbit hole” Patton laughs, Virgil chuckles a flash of red on his cheeks. “Not a bad thing, and i think you should dye your hair if you want. No matter what you're gonna look great” Patton compliments. “Crap! We’re gonna be late” He checks his watch, morning homework sessions on monday were a usual. Except when they forget to actually get to school.

“Id say race you there but i dont wanna get there any faster than I have to” Virgil says, and with that they rush out the house.

~~~

“Does he have to looking so fucking cute” Logan spits, Roman stops his words instaly and looks to where an angry Logan glares.

“Uh Im sorry, imma need my friend back” Roman pokes, Logan turns to him, his eyebrows tightened. “Dude, what is going on with you” Roman questions, Logan slams the locker shut trying to distract himself from Patton and Virgil standing just a few steps down the hall at their own lockers. “Just a reminder that you-”

“Roman I am fully aware of what happened, I am also fully aware that the only reason Patton has not spoken to me is my own fault” Logan leans against the locker paralleling Romans pose. “However I am still infuriated that he looks that cute” Logan sighs. He wasn't wrong, even if Roman and Patton had their...issues he still knew his former friend. And Patton had an incredible eye for fashion.

And today was no exception. He wore a dropped shoulder cropped pullover, striped with white, pastel blue and pink, finished with a white collar. His light blue jeans sat comfortably on his legs cuffed at the bottom to show off his white sneakers. His belt was prominent and no mistake and his backpack slung over just one shoulder as he unpacked his belongings into his locker.

Objectively he was cute, but Roman was distracted by Virgil. He stood next to Patton talking away, his outfits always suited him and his defensive look only made Romans face flush more.

“Welp, you win some you lose some” Roman shrugs, patting his friend.

“I so appreciate the sentiment dear friend” Logan's sarcasm was not lost on Roman.

“Come on, you need some sushi in you” Roman takes his friend's shoulders, preparing to guide his friend towards the exit. Each has a free period that bleeds into lunch so why not take advantage?

~~~

“Is it bad that I want to wear Romans varsity jacket?” Virgil whispered as he darted his eyes away from the said jock who only stood a few feet away.

“No, it's adorable” Patton says, he organizes his things in his locker, ignoring as Logan and Roman begin to walk towards them. He knew rationally they were headed towards the exit but the small inkling of fear if they were to come up to him was still present. But quickly his mind was taken elsewhere with an abrupt cheer.

“One! Two! Three!” He hears, why was that voice so familiar? “Who missed me!”

“Janus!” Patton recognizes, he spins with unfiltered excitement rushing through the hall. Janus laughs as he sees his friend racing towards him wasting no time to wrap him in his arms and spin him quickly. Their embrace was pure elation, Virgil caught up to the pair with his own grin. They finally parted ignoring the crowd around them, specifically two boys who had decided sushi could wait.

“Buttercup!” He grins, Patton giggles delighted. He had missed Janus so much, and the sweet way the nickname fell only increased the buzz in his heart.

Someone else in the hall was not feeling the ecstatic energy. Logan glared his shoulders tightening under Romans hold. What was this envious sweat dripping from him as he watched Janus snake a respectful arm around Patton's waist, cupped to keep his gentlemans distance.

But Logan wasn't allowed to be mad

He saw Carly down the hall, she winked at him receiving a disgruntled scowl in return. He watched Brittany and Martin walk by him, each a flustered look.

And why should he care, he had the whole school, why did he need-

His thoughts were interrupted by the most intoxicating, sweetest sound to ever bless his ears. Pattons little giggle as he clutched to Janus for stability. He may have been seventeen but he towered over the boys, including Logan. Virgil seemed happy enough but Logan couldn't get over Patton. Patton stood blushing, his hand never left Janus’s side and he was...flashing the brightest smile.

Why did Logan want to be the one to cause that reaction

“Oh shut up moreno” He whispers to himself, swiping away from Romans grasps he shoots Martin a wink before making his way to lunch, a hesitant Roman followed.

[thiswasinevitableid]

24 for danbrey, nsfw please!

24: i’m absentmindedly making snowflakes in class and you’re the nerd who can’t quit glaring at me every time you hear my scissors. It is NSFW

If they were in one of the big lecture halls, Dani would not be having this problem. But the twenty-odd person room means the snipping of scissors is irritatingly audible. The noise is coming from behind and to the left of her. Turning her head, she spots the culprit; a girl wearing a denim vest under her coat, whose curly black hair is streaked with fiery red. 

She’s cute, but Dani is still going to steal her scissors the first chance she gets. 

There’s another tell-tale “snipsnip” and she glares over her shoulder, willing the scissors to melt. When that doesn’t happen, she looks up and finds the other girl smirking at her, then sending a wink her way. 

Shoot, she’s holding the scissors at a level where it 100% looked like Dani was staring at her chest.

She flips her attention back to the front of the room. A flurry of snips makes her look back again. 

The girl has made a heart instead of a snowflake. When Dani notices it, the other girl smiles. She looks even better when she smiles. 

Damn it. 

---------------------------

“Hi!”

The unexpected greeting makes Dani jump. It’s the Thursday lecture, and snowflake girl has sat down right next to her. 

“Uh. Hi?”

“You’re Dani, right?”

“Yeeah? How did you know?”

“Um, because Professor Chicane takes role, and you always sit in front of me so I can see you when you respond. I’m Aubrey.”

“Dani.”

“Um, so, I’m sorry if the snowflakes were, like, distracting you on Tuesday. I do better in class when I have something to do with my hands but I can, like, doodle instead if it bugs you.”

“I just get a little on-edge from noise sometimes, it’s no big--wait. If you thought you were bugging me why’d you make a heart?”

“Because I thought there was also a chance you were flirting and I wanted to hedge my bets just in case.”

Dani blushes; she had no idea anyone could see her annoyed face and still hope she was flirting with them.

“Oh, crap, class is gonna start, I’m gonna move to my normal spot. The one with the nice view.” Aubrey winks over her shoulder and Dani impulsively blows her a kiss. 

Aubrey sits down next to a short guy in “Monongahela National Forest” sweatshirt and whispers something in his ear. He high fives her. 

Dani spends much of the lecture looking over her shoulder, even though Aubrey keeps the snowflakes to a minimum. In fact, she only makes one, which she leaves on Dani’s desk as she’s packing up her laptop. Written in the center of it, in red ink, is a phone number.

----------------------------------

Ideally, Aubrey would not have asked her out two weeks before the end of the semester, when Dani has to go back home for winter break. But they make the most of it. There are lots of “study” dates that involve more handsy make-outs than flash-cards, nights and afternoons snuggled up against each other in the little coffee shop by Aubrey’s apartment, and a memorable evening during which they discovered Aubrey’s immense, black rabbit, Dr. Harris Bonkers, PhD, ate through the cord on the rechargeable vibrator (luckily before they plugged it in rather than after).

When break came, Aubrey walked her to the train station and kissed her goodbye, using Dr. Harris Bonkers paw to wave farewell as the train pulled away and down the tracks. 

They text every day, Facetime or Skype at least once a day, usually when Dani has settled in for bed. She’s more than a little glad her brother is staying with his partner over the holidays; the walls of their rooms are thin and the two of theirs are next to each other. Jake stopped eavesdropping on her around the time he hit twelve years old, but the habit of not being able to quite relax while on the phone in her room remains. 

She’s extra glad for it tonight, because she wants to show off a Christmas gift she bought herself (or, more accurately, she bought for the express purpose of riling up her girlfriend).  The lace is a little fussier than she tends to buy, but it makes such cool leaf patterns, the pastel green and gold of the bra making her look stunning and the matching underwear hugging the curve of her ass in a way, if she does say so herself, is really flattering. But she’s more interested in what Aubrey thinks. 

Fireblossom: Holy shit

Dani: You like it?

Fireblossom: Uh, yeah? Why are you so far away instead of here when I can show you how hot you look?

She laughs at the string of emojis that comes through next; flames, peaches, kissy lips, and…

Fireblossom: Sorry, moth emoji is from texting Duck to tease him about his crush. Did you for real buy that just for me?

Dani: Yep. You deserve some eye candy, cutie.

Fireblossom: I’m gonna fucking combust over here. Dr. HB is gonna be an orphan because of your cute butt. 

Dani: I think we can do something about that.

Fireblossom: I’m stuck at family dinner time until nine and it’ll be hella sus if I sneak away to the bathroom for that long.

Shit, she should pull back on the teasing. Aubrey is typing something else, and she manages to get the strappy bra off in the time it takes for it to come through. 

Fireblossom: They won’t notice me texting, though.

Dani: You sure? We can totally pick this up later.

Fireblossom: But I wanna make you cum in your fancy underwear ;)

She’s not about to turn that down, texts Aubrey the green light as she rifles through her duffel bag. It’s only a small bullet vibe, but it’s never failed her. Something she’s learned in her twenty years of life is to always have a vibrator on hand when traveling away from your hot girlfriend. 

Dani: Ready. 

Fireblossom: K. Turn on the vibe, but keep it outside the underwear for now. 

The fabric is thin, and she gasps as she rubs the vibe in slow circles over her clit. She flips to voice to text, because now is not the time for an awkward autocorrecting or her one-handed typing. 

Dani: what next?

Fireblossom: Feel yourself up for me, honey. Can’t my hands on those cute tits so you’re gonna have to do it for me. 

She does as she’s told, massaging her chest and teasing her nipples the way Aubrey always does when they’re tangled up on the couch. 

Dani: Fuck that feels good. Still wish they were yours though.

Fireblossom: Soon, beautiful, I promise

She shifts her hold on the vibe, which gets it to just the right angle to curl her toes. 

Dani: Can I go under the fabric?

Fireblossom: Aww, you’re remembered to be good and ask first. Yes, you can.

“Thank god.” She slips the vibe under the silk, closes her eyes and imagines it’s Aubrey using it on her, grinning in that unfairly captivating way of hers as she tells Dani how good she’s being, how good she looks, how she’s so lucky they’re together. 

She picks up the pace, groans when she sees the next text.

Fireblossom: Cum for me, honey, use both hands

Dani shoves her free hand down and pushes two fingers inside, moaning as she envisions Aubrey kissing her as a reward for doing it. It doesn’t take long, she’s been low-key horny all day and turned on ever since she got that first message back from Aubrey. The orgasm is short and satisfying, bursting out from her and making her feel like every one of her limbs is tingling with exhausted delight. 

Dani: Came. Holy fuck. How are you this hot just through a screen?

Fireblossom: A magician never reveals her tricks ;)

Dani: A magician should make an exception for her girlfriend who’s still seeing stars. 

Fireblossom: Flatterer. 

Dani sighs, rolls onto her stomach so she can text more easily, not sure what’s she’s supposed to say now.

Fireblossom: That was really hot though. And now I miss you even more.

Dani: I miss you too, fireblossom. I can’t wait to come back to you. 

Fireblossom: Me neither. Can I Facetime you tonight? 

Dani: Totally.

Fireblossom: If I get lucky, will you help let off all the steam I just built up?

Dani: Of course, babe.

Fireblossom: GTG, nephew is bugging Dr HB. Talk to you soon, you make me feel like the luckiest girl in the world <3

Dani: Don’t be silly. That’s obviously me, because I’ve got you <3