#mostly because I wanted to see more of his sister and her two boyfriends bc they seemed neat | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

fixfoxnox · 2 years

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Anyrhing for a roach birthday drabble bc 1. I love the angst and 2. I wanna eat your writing

OKAY ITS FINISHED NOW YOU GUYS CAN READ IT

Idk if this is very angsty but I'm sure you can eat it if you try hard enough :)

"I'm giving you a heads up, they're throwing you a surprise party."

If Roach could have, he would have shot up in his bed. Unfortunately the still stinging injuries around his chest and abdomen prevented that. He settled for giving back a quick word of, "What! I told them I didn't want a party!"

He could hear Jackson give a faint chuckle over the line, "To be fair to them, I think its only supposed to by family plus me, but your mom did call it a party."

Roach gave a groan, "That means they're going to make a big deal out of it."

"Yep," Jackson playfully popped the p in the word. Roach could practically hear his grin through the phone. "Hey, it could be fun. Big number thirty one, thats a big deal isn't it?"

Roach shifted a bit in his bed, his chest constricting as he thought about Jackson's words. The man was right, it technically was a big birthday for him, though only the two of them knew it. Number thirty one, it meant that he'd officially outlived his first life. Despite the fact that it should have made him happy, all that it actually made him want to do was curl up in a ball and cry.

He remembered Jackson's twenty seventh birthday, when he'd officially outlived his first life. His friend had appeared mostly fine at the beginning of the night, but at the mini celebration that Roach had held for him, he'd gotten himself drunk.

He remembered that day clearly in his mind. Jackson had stormed around his house in a drunken stupor, tearing up any of his military things that he could. Roach had done what he could to control the damage, but in the end he hadn't been able to do much.

The night had ended with his friend sobbing into his arms until he'd passed out. Roach was hoping to avoid a similar fate, which was why he'd asked for only a small celebration. Not a party. A party made things more real.

"Hey," Jackson's voice was soft through the phone, "You know I'll be there. I'll help divert attention away and give you an excuse for a break if you need it. You won't be alone on this."

"I know," Roach commented quietly, "I know. It just," he gave a deep sigh, "its just a lot to deal with."

Jackson was quiet for a moment, "Would it help if I invited the 141?" There was a pause, "Your mom hasn't invited them, I'm sure she'll be pissed at me but hey, its your party, not hers."

"Its her house though," Roach commented quietly.

"We can keep them in the yard," Jackson's voice took on a teasing tone, "Should be a nice day, I'm sure they won't mind."

Roach gave a small snort, feeling his chest lighten up slightly with his friends teasing, "You just want to invite them so you can see Gaz again."

Jackson gave a gasp, "I am deeply offended by that Roach. How could you think that?"

"Because it's the truth," Roach called over the phone. "My brother will be heart broken, devastated. He's still claiming that Soap and Ghost are acting and not actually my boyfriends." Calling Soap and Ghost his boyfriends made his heart flutter a bit and he felt a grin tug at his lips.

"I've broken his heart by not actually dating you."

"And taken a lot of stress off of Eddie," Roach teased the man, "He's been trying to convince me to break up with you for years now."

"He'll be happy to see the 141 then, I'll bring them along. I'm sure Ghost and Soap will be more than happy to get to cuddle up to you for a bit." And that was that. If Roach was going to have to sit through a surprise party, he could at least do it with his friends.

Just as Jackson had warned him, when his birthday came around it was clear to see that his family were planning something. His sister-in-laws had obviously been tasked with keeping him out of the house until things were ready.

They'd woken him up early in the morning to drag him to one of the local restaurants in town for breakfast. He'd eaten his food rather fast, but they'd taken an almost ridiculous amount of time to finish theirs off. After that, they'd taken him to one of the small strip malls that their town had, forcing him to walk around with them for hours.

If he hadn't known about the party from Jackson, and hadn't picked it up from their odd behavior, the ride back home certainly would have told him that something was going on. Alice and Melissa spent almost the entire ride sharing secretive excited glances with one another and asking him if he was ready for his birthday "dinner."

Luckily nothing that he'd done with the women was too overwhelming, but he did find an oddly sickening feeling that had formed in his stomach. He'd tried to keep his mind off of the fact that he had now officially outlived his first life, but it was rather hard to do.

He nearly rolled his eyes when they got to the house again. Jackson and the 141 hadn't even tried to hide their vehicles and the thought nearly made him laugh. He managed to keep it down to nothing more than an amused smile as Melissa and Alice helped him back into the house.

As soon as he stepped inside he was met with shouts of "happy birthday!" from all around him. He was certainly a little upset at his mother for throwing him a party, despite his desire not to have one, but he couldn't control the bit of delighted laughter that erupted from his mouth when he spotted his team.

His mother had clearly made everyone put on the hats, but it didn't stop him from enjoying the sight of each of the usually gruff and tough military men wearing bright green cone party hats on their heads.

He could see his mothers bright grin in response to his laughter and he couldn't help but meet her with a smile. Surely he could handle a party if the 141 and Jackson were there to help distract him.

"Happy birthday, baby!" His mother pressed a kiss to his cheek, "I know you said no parties, but I figured a small get together couldn't hurt anything."

"Thank you, mom," he gave her a small smile. A moment after and there was a hand ruffling at his hair. "Hey!" He made a swipe at the limb, turning to pout at Jonathan.

"Happy birthday, little man. What are you now, 20?" Roach rolled his eyes at his brothers words. He sounded far too much like their grandpa used to around their birthdays.

"Alright, grandpa," he playfully shoved him away.

"Hey now," Jonathan warned, "you may be military but I'll still put you in a headlock!"

"You better not," That was Eddie's concerned voice from across the room, "If you rip his stitches Jonathan, I swear to god!"

"It was only a joke Eds," Jonathan gave his younger brother a grin.

"It better be," Eddie grumbled out. He turned his attention to Roach with a small smile, "Happy birthday, bubs."

Roach gave him a quick flash of a grin, "Thanks Eds."

"Alright," his mother clapped her hands together, catching everyone's attention, "Let's move out to the backyard with the kids. I have all the food and gifts and everything set up out there!" Roach wanted to complain about the gifts, but a quick look from his father had him shutting his mouth with a start. There really had been no need for anyone to get him a gift.

He gave a small huff, but quickly his mind moved away from the topic, instead focusing on his team. He used the momentary chaos of everyone shuffling to the backyard as a chance to make his way over to the men. "Thank you guys for coming, I hope my mom didn't give too much trouble."

"She, uh," Gaz glanced at Jackson nervously, "actually didn't seem too surprised to see us. It was like she was expecting Jackson to invite us, though she did chew him out good for not telling her."

Jackson waved him off before pointing at the group and meeting Roach's eyes with a smirk, "They've experienced a southern mothers anger now, needless to say they're scared shitless." Roach couldn't help but snicker at his words.

"Well, I appreciate you guys enduring it for me. I am really glad that you guys are here," he gave the group a smile. His words were the truth. Just their presence seemed to help calm down the sickness that had been pooling in his stomach.

"Course, son," Price slapped his arm slightly, giving him a smile, "c'mon, we'd better move outside before anyone notices we're missing."

The group moved together, Roach found himself settled between Ghost and Soap as they provided him a careful hand to help him outside. "Glad you guys are here," Roach muttered to them quietly as they walked. He gave their hands that were clasped in his own a short squeeze.

"Course, Bug," Simon spoke softly, his voice only slightly muffled by the face mask that he wore.

"Happy birthday," Soap added a moment later, giving him a small peck on the cheek after saying the words. Roach felt his heart fluttering in his chest. Perhaps the day wouldn't be so bad.

"Uncle Gary look! I'm so tall!" Roach couldn't help the laugh that escaped his lips, absolute delight filling his chest as he watched the scene in front of him.

Soap and Ghost had been rather quickly commandeered by his nephews and nieces as soon as they'd made their appearance outside. The two men had barely been allowed to eat before one of his nieces was tugging at Soap's shirt and demanding that he put her on his shoulders. Soap, despite the calls from Jonathan and Melissa that he didn't have to, had agreed. Ghost had fallen into a similar fate moments later and Roach had been watching the two be used as climbing posts for the past half an hour.

His nieces and nephews had been constructing an elaborate story around the two men as well. Apparently they were giants from a kingdom in the midst of a civil war and now we're being ridden into battle by their fierce leaders. Which essentially meant that the two men were allowing two of his nieces to play sword fight while on their shoulders. They each had a child around their legs as well, the children giggling as they were lifted into the air with each step. The sight of it all had nearly bowled Roach over with how adorable it was.

His family members had seemed content to just watch the show, occasionally calling out teasing remarks before going back to simple conversation. Roach had noticed that Gaz and Jackson seemed quite occupied with one another. Jackson had managed to pull several fits of laughter from Gaz and, based on the grins on their faces, Roach could assume that things were going well for his two friends.

After several more moments of watching the pretend war between his nieces and nephews and his boyfriends, Roach had turned away briefly, just long enough to request that someone fill up his cup for him and observe the breakout of conversation at the table. Gaz and Jackson were speaking with one another quietly and it seemed like Price had found himself in a conversation with his parents, from the smile on his parents faces he could assume it was going well. As per usual, his brothers and their wives were chatting in a group together.

He gave a small smile over the rim of his cup when it was handed back to him, it was so nice to finally get to spend some time with his family. And it was nice to see that his team seemed to be getting along with them well.

There was a tug on his shirt that interrupted his train of thought. He turned to look down, his eyes meeting the mischievous grin of Marie, Jonathan's youngest, and Kinsley, Eddie's six year old. "Hey girls," he gave them a small smile, "What are you up to? I trust nothing bad?"

The two girls glance at each other, some form of silent communication passing between them. After a moment, Marie looked back to him with a smile, "Uncle Gary, will you play with us?"

Roach gave a sad sigh, "I'm sorry girls, I would love to but I'm not supposed to be moving around." He glanced up at Eddie before back down to the girls, "I think your daddy would be very mad at me if I tried to Kinsley."

"You don't have to move!" Kinsley told him excitedly, "We want you to be the princess!"

"Princess?" Roach had to hide his laughter behind his hand, "thats all?" He didn't quite believe the girls and their little giggles when he asked told him that they had something else in mind for him.

"Thats all!" Marie confirmed with a toothy grin. It was quite adorable as she was missing one of her front teeth, having lost it only a week ago. She'd shown it off to everyone proudly as well as the dollar that the tooth fairy had left her.

"Alright," Roach agreed with a smile. He would take whatever else they had planned for him, surely it couldn't be too bad. "I'll be the princess then."

"Yes!" The two girls said nothing else to him before taking off running over to where several of their siblings and cousins were waiting so that they could whisper to them excitedly. It only made Roach more suspicious of their plans.

He turned, watching them quietly. After a moment, the group scattered, running back over to Soap and Ghost. His nieces and nephews who had been around the men's ankles had moved off to join the chatting group, so all his nieces had to to was gain Soap and Ghosts attention. "Hey! Hey! Put them down we have an announcement." Roach watched Marie stamp her foot at the two men, her face serious.

As they were told, Soap and Ghost released the two children that were on their shoulders. Marie pushed them apart, stepped between them with a bright grin before beginning to yell, "People of Dinosauratopia!" Roach covered his mouth again, trying not to laugh. His nieces yelling had caught the attention of everyone at the table and he could hear the conversation behind him fall silent with a chuckle, "We have an announcement to make! The terms of the war have changed! This fight is now between the giants alone!" She motioned to Soap, "Sir Sudsy!" Then to Ghost, "and Sir Simon!"

Even from his distance away, Roach could hear Soap grumbling about having been called "Sir Sudsy" while Ghost got to use his actual name. It pulled yet another laugh from his lips. He felt like his face might split apart with how much he'd been grinning.

"Now thats a fight I can get behind!" Jonathan called out playfully from the table, "For the betterment of Dinosauratopia of course." His words pulled laughter from the entire group.

"The prize!" His niece called out with a bright grin, catching everyone's attention again, "The winner will be gifted with a kiss from the princess!" Roach felt his face go bright red. So this was what his nieces had been plotting. Marie paused to run over to him, pointing up at him with glee for Soap and Ghost, "If you win! The princess will give you a kiss!"

Soap shot him a bright grin, amusement in his eyes, "Oh my, what a prize that is. I'll have to win, apologies Sir Simon." He gave a teasing wink to Ghost who merely rolled his eyes at him.

"Sir Sudsy," Ghost spoke flatly, "I'm afraid I can't let you win."

"A challenge!" Marie cackled from next to him, excitedly jumping up onto the bench, "Everyone gather around and witness the fight of a life time!" Roach wanted to comment that Jonathan had clearly been letting her watch too much wrestling, but he didn't get a chance as she continued, "Begin your fight men! Me and my army," she motioned to her siblings and cousins, "will guard the princess until a victor has been declared. Fight, fight, fight!"

Roach was more than a little curious on how the two men intended to fight each other. After all, he could assume that they wouldn't just start sparring in his families backyard. Or at least he hoped they wouldn't.

He was pleasantly surprised when the men simply locked arms and began to wrestle at one another, clearly overexaggerating their movements in a show for the now cheering children. Behind him, Roach could hear Jonathan give a cheer as well.

"Should we take bets," Jonathan called, "I think we should take bets."

"Five on Simon," Price called playfully, "If you want to lose your money."

"You're on," Jonathan called. "Let's go Sir Sudsy! Get him! Choke him out!"

A moment later and Marie copied her fathers words, "Get him! Choke him out!!" Roach couldn't help but laugh at the adorable display.

The two men wrestled playfully for several minutes before finally Ghost was able to pull Soap into a headlock, ruffling his hair playfully until Soap was calling out an over exaggerated, "Mercy! Mercy!"

Ghost released Soap just as Marie called out, "We have a winner! Sir Simon has won the war of Dinosauratopia and the love of the Princess!" She ran over to Ghost, grabbing his hand and tugging him over to where Roach was sitting. She motioned between the two with a bright grin, "Claim your prize Sir Simon!"

Roach could feel his face heat up again. Ghost gave a rumbling, low chuckle at his nieces words before leaning down, tugging his facemask down just enough that he could press their lips together in a short, but sweet kiss. Roach gave him a grin when he pulled away, unable to contain the adoration on his face.

A moment later and he heard a dramatic cry from Soap. He turned to see the man with the back of his hand pressed to his forehead, "I am heart broken! My chest, ah! What is this pain! I must be dying!" There was a gasp and suddenly three of Roach's nieces, including Marie, were surrounding Soap.

"No, Sir Sudsy!"

"I think," Soap gave a fake cough, " the only thing that could cure me is a kiss from the princess!" Roach could hear his family snickering behind him, he didn't care.

"Quickly then!" Marie started pulling Soap toward him, "Princess you must kiss Sir Sudsy! Its the only thing that could save his life."

Roach was sure he had a goofy grin on his face as he responded, "Quickly then, my good sir. We must save your life!"

"Indeed!" Soap leaned down to press a kiss to his mouth, this one a slight bit longer than the one he and Simon had shared. The man pulled back after a moment, a bright grin on his face, "I am cured! Thank you, Princess!"

Soap and Ghost were allowed to finally sit down not long after that, his brothers wrangling their children into their own seats to force them to eat. Roach was pressed between the two men on the bench, his head leaned against Soap's shoulder while his hand was clasped tightly together with Simon's under the table. He was listening to his family chat around him. He'd never felt quite so content before. Any anxiety he'd felt about the day had all but disappeared.

It was an important birthday for him. A terrifying one. One that had threatened to send him down a road of panic and hurt. He was more than happy to have Ghost and Soap there, providing him a barrier from that. He knew they didn't know. It didn't mean that they hadn't helped him.

He was snapped out of his thoughts by his mothers excited clapping, "Alright, I've waited long enough! Its gift time!"

Roach gave a small groan from his place against Soap's shoulder. He'd felt close to passing out from how warm and happy he'd felt in the position. "You guys shouldn't have gotten me anything." He pushed himself to sit up.

"Nonsense!" His mother called as she loaded the, frankly, giant pile of presents onto the table in front of him.

"Oh my god," Roach looked at everything with furrowed brows, "What the fuck, why are there so many?"

He felt Soap wince next to him and he looked over to meet the man's sheepish gaze, "Ghost and I may have went a bit overboard."

His head whipped back and forth between the two men for several moments, "You guys-?" He let out an undignified squeak. It was a bit overwhelming for him to know that the two men had apparently gotten him so many gifts.

"Alright," his mother grinned at him brightly, "Lets start with these. Here is the one from your dad and I!" She handed him one of the larger boxes in the pile, he took it from her hesitantly.

He stared at it for a moment, mentally psycing himself up as he looked at it. He hated opening presents in front of people. He always felt worried that he would give the wrong reaction and hurt someone's feelings.

After several moments of quiet staring, he reached up and started to slowly peel the paper away from the gift inside. Pleasant surprise filled his chest as he looked at the gift in front of him. They'd bought him a Polaroid camera. He could feel his mouth quirk up into a grin as he looked at it closer. "We know your old one broke a while back, so we thought we'd buy you a new one. That way you can start sending us pictures again and you can take some for yourself."

Roach had kept a small Polaroid camera with him during his first few years in the military. He almost always had it with him, ready to snap a quick picture of himself or something he saw so that he could send it home to his parents. His first camera was why he had almost an entire photo album worth of embarrassing pictures of Jackson. His camera had broken during his first year with the demon dogs and he hadn't gotten a chance to buy himself another one.

The thought of getting to take pictures again, of himself, of Jackson, and of the 141, made his chest feel warm. "Thank you," he gave his parents a bright grin.

"Damn," Jackson muttered out, "After all the trouble I went through to get rid of the first one," he joked.

"Watch your back Jackson," Roach responded, "Those embarrassing pictures of you are going to start rolling through again. Who knows, I might even share them with the team." He made a point to look at Gaz specifically as he spoke. Jackson answered him with a groan.

Roach continued through the presents, opening everything gratefully. He'd received gift cards from his brothers, their usual gifts to him. Jackson had wrapped up his, now repaired, scarf as well as gifted him a rather large crocheted blanket that he'd made with his grandmother. Price had given him a rather nice bottle of wine and Gaz had put together a large box with a variety of snacks and candy inside. All that was left were the several small to medium sized gifts in front of him, all apparently from Soap and Ghost.

He looked at the pile of gifts, trying to decide where to start. "Any that I need to open first?" He tilted his head at the gifts, eyeing one in particular.

"No," Soap still sounded a bit guilty, "any order, Bug."

Roach reached for one of the gifts, grabbing the one that looked and felt like a book in his hands. He could handle a book. It would be a good start. He carefully pulled the wrapping of the paper from around it, a pleased hum leaving his lips as he took in the leather-bound journal that rested in his hands. It was clearly a nice thing, likely expensive based on the feel of the leather. Emblazoned on the front of it was a beetle, golden paint outlining it clearly from where it was indented into the material.

"Thought you might like one," Soap spoke lowly, "I hope you don't mind, but I started it for you." Roach tilted his head at him, unbinding the journal so that he could flip to the first page. He felt a grin cross his face. Soap had drawn a little sketch of the three of them together. He carefully closed the journal, wrapping the leather cord that held it closed around it tightly before turning to place a kiss to Soap's cheek. He turned to do the same to Ghost a moment later, "Thank you two, I love it."

He turned back to the table, feeling his face heat up a bit as he realized just how many more things he was going to have to open. It was going to be a process.

By the time Roach had opened his last gift from Soap and Ghost, he was exhausted. He was thankful to the two men, but very exhausted. Everything that they'd gotten him had pulled a grin to his face, each of the gifts making his heart flutter in his chest. There was the customized knife, one that fit well enough within the regulations that he'd be able to take it into the field with him. A small journal filled with drawings that Soap had done for him. A little tea set, with a tea infuser that he could use to make his own blends and dip into his mug. An adorable mug to go with it (it had little frogs and bugs glazed onto the sides). Then there was a new jacket, warm and tactical enough that it could go into the field with him as well. A cute little skull necklace. A gift card to his favorite ice cream place near base. A new bat plush for his collection. A nice pair of obviously expensive sunglasses. A little leather corded bracelet with a metal piece attached that had a little engraved message from the two men on it. It was needless to say, that they'd gone all out with his gifts. It was both adorable and overwhelming for him.

Still, it didn't stop him from sending them a beaming grin with every gift that he opened. It also didn't stop him from, hours later, being wrapped up on the couch inside with his new bat plush tucked against his chest as he snuggled up to the two men.

His family were milling about the house, things winding down as they put left over food up and chatted idly with one another. Roach knew it was late. He knew that the 141 would be leaving soon. He didn't want Soap and Ghost to go.

"Stay the night," he muttered into Ghost's chest. He could feel the rumbles of laughter from both Soap and Ghost at his request.

"You know we'd love too, Bug," Soap's hand stroked along his arm before landing temptingly on his thigh, "we would really love to."

"But your mother would likely kill us," Ghost finished for him, placing a kiss to the top of his head.

"I'm an adult," Roach whined low in his throat, "It's my birthday. She has to let you stay."

"I don't think thats how it works, Bug."

Roach pulled himself away from Ghosts chest, his face grumpy as he looked around the room blearily. He knew who would help him. "Jackson!" He called with a groan, "Come here for a second."

He didn't get a response, but a moment later and Jackson was standing in front of the group, a grin on his face. "What's up, buttercup!"

He seemed very cheery. Almost too cheery. Roach squinted at him, looking him up and down for a moment before asking, "Gaz invited you back to the hotel with him didn't he?" He could see the blush that rose to cover his friends cheeks and he could hear Soap snicker in the seat next to him. "I don't care," Roach raised a hand as Jackson opened his mouth to speak, "Good for you guys, I need you to do me a favor."

"Whats up?"

"I need you to get my mom to let Soap and Ghost stay the night with me." Roach tilted his head at the man, "I know its a hard ask, but-"

"Hard ask?" Jackson clicked his tongue, "Always doubting me Sanderson. I'm your mothers favorite child you know. I'll be right back." Just like that, Jackson disappeared into the kitchen.

"You think he'll actually get her to say yes?" Soap pressed a kiss to the top of his head, then his cheek, before finally bringing his hand to his mouth to begin pressing kisses there.

Roach shivered, feeling Ghost bury his face into his neck to begin placing kisses on the skin of his throat. "If anyone is going to get her to say yes, it'll be Jackson."

The three sat together, just sharing lazy kisses back and forth for nearly ten minutes before Jackson popped back into the room, a big grin on his face. "Am I the best friend in the world or what?"

"She said yes?" Ghost asked, surprise leaking into his voice.

"Just for the night," Jackson responded with a grin, "you'll have to leave in the morning and she said that you guys have to keep things quiet or she'll send you home early," he winked at them after the last part and Roach felt his face go warm. He couldn't find it in himself to care about his embarrassment though, not when he would get to have Soap and Ghost to himself for the entire night.

"You're amazing," he shot Jackson a grin, "thank you."

"Happy birthday," Jackson replied simply. He shot him another wink. "Have fun," he teased before leaving the room once again.

"Quick," Roach grinned at the men next to him, "upstairs before my mom changes her mind or one of my brothers notice."

"So eagar," Soap teased with a grin as he stood. The two men helped him from the seat, guiding him toward the stairs quietly. It was a miracle they made it up the stairs so quietly, especially with Soap's hands becoming more and more grabby the closer they got to Roach's room. Ghost was able to mostly control himself, though Roach did feel one of his hands sneak down for a quick grab of his ass as they walked.

Roach had been worried about his birthday. He'd been more stressed than he wanted to admit. But now, as he quietly closed the door to his room, feeling warm lips latch onto his neck and another pair of hands lovingly feel around his body, he couldn't even remember why he'd been worried.

#you asked luke #something in the orange #gary roach sanderson #simon ghost riley #ghost x roach #ghostroach #ghost x soap #john soap mactavish #soap x roach #soapghost #soaproach #soapghostroach #ghostroachsoap

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sirenemale · 4 months

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WARRIOR CATSSSSSSSSS LETS GOOOOOOOOO ❓️💢

I was hoping someone would ask for theseee YAY

❓️ : fav total background character (im not talking minor characters like say. whitewing or moonlight, i mean cats with like...3 lines tops)

This is sooo hard actually. I think most of mine still fall into minor adjacent cause they get some focus and lines. But I've always really liked Ashfoot, literally one of the only wc map parts I've made was about her. I always thought the windclan family dynamic of her being related to onestar was really fun. She just seems very together and competent and idk, I like that she and her husband were both deputies with a foot suffix.

I also always really liked breezepelt's kids, idk what they ever really got up to in canon but Smokehaze, brindlewing, appleshine and woodsong are such cute names. There's probably a lot to explore with how he'd approach parenting with how he grew up. I also think it's really cute that the older sisters ended up mentoring their younger siblings.

Also not super minor, but I guess semi-minor in terms of how often I see fan stuff for them. Pretty much every side or minor character in Graystripe's vow i really liked. Gremlin, Fury, all of warriorclan. Petunia especially, I think all of them you can draw some really fun parallels with first arc characters, I almost wish we'd gotten some kinda soft reset where we start following them instead of the kinda giant extended never ending conflict we have in the main clans. Fury is the antagonist obviously but I don't think she made any kinda impact on the fandom really, I just think she's fun. At the end when she's mostly defeated and bleeding out she crawls to the top of the high rocks in thunderclan camp and I was hoping soooo fucking bad she'd be deranged enough to just stand up there boasting until she died. Not what happened but it's what happened in my heart, not deep at all as a character I just liked that she got to be kinda crazy.

OTHER than thattt. I can only think of Red from Skyclan's destiny. There was a rogue camp and she had drama with her dad bc she had a boyfriend, then her dad Stick tries to kill that guy and she jumps in front first and dies and everyone regrets it lmao.

💢 : what scene made you the most irrationally angry upon first reading

The entirety of Squirrelflight's hope for 1. It was such a viscerally deeply upsetting book to me.

The scenes of Bramblestar demoting squirrelflight to children's tasks, not letting her leave the camp without telling him because she Challenged him, taking her autonomy away, guilt tripping her, telling her she's selfish for not wanting to kill pregnant woman who is going to leave in Less than a MONTH anyway. The whole book just made me feel crazy. It's crazy how uncharacteristically sadistic every character becomes JUST so squirrelflight can be made to look inconsiderate for Embarrassing her husband in public by telling him they can just Wait for them to leave. And it's worse because it does completely break her down, Bramblestar completely shatters her sense of confidence, her sense of safety and personality ALL for the book to treat it like it was two-sided, all for her to apologize to him for speaking up and then the book ends. I don't think warrior cats has ever written anything more vile than this genuinely.

I remember that scene where she brought one of the sisters, who was dying, into camp for Leafpool to treat. and bramblestar threatened leafpool, his sister-in law and their DOCTOR not to heal an outsider. when squirrelflight argues and protects leafpool, fights for sunrise, bramblestar asks Why are you doing this to me. Guilting her and forcing her to choose between saving a woman's life, protecting her sister, AND listening to him beyond all reason. Choosing anything else except him is Hurting him. That's the framing. And it's crazy bc this isn't normal for warrior cats either, again it's uncharacteristically sadistic, it goes against the code, and it's all so they could write this scene, so bramble could say that, So it would Hurt squirrelflight, and punish her narratively.

You'd think it's intentional writing but then you remember this is the last book he's meant to be Good, because the next arc he's possessed by ashfur and is meant to actually be abusive and possessive and terrifying, which he is. But it's just fucking mortifying that the writer's idea of Bramblestar at his best, at the point where everyone missed him, is this. That they consistently do believe their relationship is healthiest and most equal when she is completely submitting to him.

ANYWAY that;s not even the actual last scene that broke me irt actually reading warrior cats myself LMAO.

it was similar though it was the way they handled shadowsight in the broken code. Similar thing of a character who is being so outrageously abused, other characters around him are suddenly far more sadistic and cruel than they've been before just to further beat him down While also having it be narratively justified.

Anyway it's the scene where Shadowsight, mothwing (i think), lionblaze and willowshine are trying to access the dark forest or starclan to get bramble's spirit back. No one trusts shadowsight, they all literally hate him, especially Lionblaze. Shadowsight offers to go to the dark forest, knowing there's a good chance he'll die there. He does this because he's basically suicidal at this point, so wracked with guilt over unknowingly creating this situation and having everyone Blame him for it that he's like Let me make it right. Lionblaze refuses because he doesn't trust him, so Willowshine offers instead. Willow lies down and closes her eyes so she can dream herself into the dark forest and in one of the fucking rawest scenes they've had in a MINUTE she dies on the spot. Ashfur killed her spirit in the darkforest so fast that barely a minute after she closes her eyes her physical body DIES. Lionblaze immediatelyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy blames shadowsight for this and is like it should have been you why did you let this happen. And at that point i was really like. if i keep reading this series I am Actually going to smash my head into a walllllllllll. I think I did finish the book a while later and idk.

It's hard knowing so much of this could be really hard hitting writing about abuse and complex situations. I think the meta of warriors is really interesting, the way the authors misogyny and absurd hate for abuse victims literally warps the world and character morals book by book. The way it literally gets worse as the books continue. I can't stomach reading it myself anymore LMAO. But I also have permanent brain worms for warriors so I still keep up with the character drama in the new books, there's stuff that's really interesting to me. Looking at curlfeather, frostpaw and splashtail's stuff. But yeah

#warrior cats

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87435678753256732 · 1 year

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manifestations + new stuff

what will be happening this year:

will start grad school (3 years)

possibly moving out?

I had talked to my mother about moving out about a year ago. It was just contemplation. What she said to me was nicer than what I imagined it would be. basically, she stated that she would support me, as she knows that I would eventually move on with my own life. this was way better than what I thought it would be. I had internalized the guilt of a first gen daughter, and assumed that I would get hit with a guilt trip. Now that grad School will start in august, I have been starting to actually look into it. the guilt mostly came from how my mother would pay rent. who would cover my portion? I did remember that she told me one of her friends was interested, so maybe she still is? I brainstormed and rehearsed what I would say for the entire day basically. if I said ONE wrong thing, she would easily twist that and use it against me.

The conversation I had with her was tough, but I wasn't attacked which was nice. basically said that if I wanted to do that, I have 30 days to do it and I would have to figure out my own bills that I go half with her. I was taken a back, especially because i didn't state a definite day that I would leave. im hoping it is just a test, lmao? I would have to figure out 1. rent 2. cell phone bill 3. car insurance 4. internet 5. light (utilities) + other expenses like food. I am going half on our car insurance, so that'll be interesting to figure out. it feels like she wants to completely cut me off, which I understand if that is what independence looks like, but it is a very hard transition. my sister will start college soon, so hopefully she can get a job and help my mom with rent + the additional person that will rent my room which I assume will be her friend that was interested.

as for myself, im kind of winging it. I would like it to either be by work, or by school. I should be able to find a decent deal in oc, but lb def has cheaper prices. if I go to lb, I will be leaving oc which I don't think im ready for? my boyfriend has been having issues with his roommate, mostly bc of their differences in lifestyles. based off what he told me, I think his friend may be autistic, which makes it difficult for him to communicate and adapt to change. I feel a bit bad bc it was me coming over that caused this. my bf feels bad bc they've been friends for so long, and he's not sure if he has ruined their friendship. I tried to comfort him and went over how to present his feelings to his roommate, without making it sound like a guilt trip. his roommate said he needs to leave asap, but is open to paying his part until the lease ends (oct) which is interesting. the rate that they are paying is what a 1b1b is going for, which is wild? if his roommate does leave, the possibility of us living together increases. I would feel more comfortable living with him than with new people. it seems very fast, I am aware of that, but I really do love him and don't have a bad gut feeling about this. I still haven't told my mom that I am contemplating living with him, mostly bc I do not want her to see him as a bad person, bc she easily splits. when we had the conversation, she did not bring him up which was a little surprising. there could also be the possibility that she likes him compared to my past partners. I will talk to him about this later today, and what my plan is. im not exactly sure how serious my mom was when she told me she wanted me to have it figured out by may (two weeks?), but she could also be testing to see if im as capable of being an adult as id like to think I am. welp!

income wise, im doing pretty well. I make 25/hr FT, around 4000. my partner makes around the same as well. he's currently doing a certificate program that could bump up his income once he has the certificate and takes advantage of the career center program available for folks in tech classes. based off the stuff he's doing, income will most likely go up (tech related), especially in OC where there's so many companies looking. remote work is also a possibility. I would def not be contemplating moving if we both worked service jobs. but I should be good as rates go up. what im not too sure about is my moms income. she works two jobs, and brings in around 2500/mo. my sister could pitch in around 500 if she gets a job. the roommate (prob her friend, Bee) will prob be looking at 1-1.5k. making it 1k mom, 500 sister, 1.5k roommate. so looks like it should work out? I was also thinking abut my dog as well. initially, we got her for me as an ESA, but she has become super close with my mom and probably likes her the most. so she'll most likely stay here.

im very excited to see what my next steps will be. it will be hard, esp adjusting after being with my mom for so long. but its okay, life goes on and I guess my start will be in 2023.

easter went good! I spent Sunday with I and his family. there was a good chunk of them, around 10-15??? they were all very nice and welcoming! this was his hispanic side, which he basically grew up with. his aunt liked that I spoke Spanish, and they probably liked that I was latino and visibly brown as well LOL. my bf was trying to enjoy the event, but it was hard when he was just thinking about his friendship in the back of his head. I got home early that night bc he was feeling tired, which I understood. it was cool to finally be around a lot of cool people/family. my family is small, and with my moms personality disorder, she always has beef with them so we have NEVER had a gathering that I can remember (23 years? lol) mostly because of her pride and individualistic selfishness. I understand why she would think that way. to her. she's closer with her sisters in Mexico, but due to her status, she cannot see then unless she gets documentation or if she just decides to go back. we have had the convo before, and she has said that her hopes are to go back to Mexico and live in the home that she was been putting money in for the past two decades. ive been aware of this, especially when many of my own clients born in Mexico that have shared that their end goal is to be in Mexico bc they don't want to pass away here. I don't think that will be any time soon. maybe once my sister goes her own way. anyway, thats it for now. I will practice some manifestation bc tiktok astrologers are saying its important

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libraryleopard · 2 years

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Icebreaker by A.L. Graziadei

YA contemporary novel

Follows the youngest son in a family of hockey champions as he navigates his first semester of college, the pressure of the upcoming NHL draft, and falling for the guy who should be his his biggest rival for the draft

Bisexual protagonist with anxiety and depression, Black gay love interest

Explores mental healthy, familial expectations, and picking your own path in life

#sure did just read a novel all about hockey without knowing like anything about hockey lol #the cover/tagline makes this sound very romance-focused but there's also a lot about mental health and familial pressure #ngl wouldn't have minded if it was a bit longer in the second half #mostly because I wanted to see more of his sister and her two boyfriends bc they seemed neat #and some of the family stuff seemed a tiny bit rushed at the end #but we do love a disaster bi short king #icebreaker #lulu speaks #lulu reads icebreaker #al graziadei #pride reading 2022

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heyitsyn · 4 years

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MANAGER!SEIJOH AU

a/n: this is kind of an au like what if you were

for more seijoh content, check this masterlist out!

anon:

- 🥺👉🏻👈🏻 i would like to request a seijoh!manager reader who’s a first year and is siblings with ushi and the team’s reaction to finding out that she was supposed to go to shiratorizawa with ushi and their reaction with her getting along with the shiratorizawa volleyball team and maybe the manager is a small cute soft little energetic ball of sunshine 🥺🥺 also hewwo, hope youre doing well! ☺️ -🎷🐛

- Ir seijoh manager series is so gooood. Can we get something where by some weird reason yn-chan is close to ushijima and tendou and the seijoh boys dont know about it and how they'd react to her being so affectionate w them ahahwindkdn

EVERYONE SHUT UP AND LOOK AT HOW FREAKING PRETTY TENDOU IS LIKE AKLFDJLASKFJDLSKFJDSFLKD

okayokayokay

so this is a what if thing

like what if ushijima was your older brother

SLKFDJADFLIJSDKLDF I CAN ALREADY IMAGINE OIKAWA SCREAMING

you didnt exactly have the best relationship with your mom

you remember when you were younger that she used to yell at your brother for using his left hand and you got angry a lot because you were fiercely protective of your brother

this caused her to yell at you too for being nosy and being involved in something you shouldnt be in

duh we know that ushi’s dad takashi actually supported him for this and protected him too and you were also a papa’s girl so you always ran to him

he understood you both better and while your mother worked, he was at home taking care of you two

then when they mentioned wanting to separate, you were very sad but somewhat relieved

mostly because you hated hearing your parents arguing and you felt bad for your brother as he constantly did whatever to get you out of the house

thats what brought on your love for volleyball

you werent exactly the best player but you were interested in it and often watched matches with him

but you also liked volleyball because your brother liked it

you liked whatever your brother liked

he adored you too and he was a boy who didnt talk much due to your mother but he was always a talker with you

especially when you couldnt sleep, he would sneak you out of your room and you both would run to the kitchen and eat ice cream

even with just a 2 year age difference, he looked as if he was older than you due to his massive height

‘just wait nii-chan! i will drink enough milk to reach your height!’

*insert lenny face*

AKLDJFSLDKFJDF I HATE MYSELF

CAN I PLEASE DIE

however

when they divorced, you thought your father would take both you and ushi

like the lady at the court even asked you where you wanted to go and not a breath of hesitation you chose your father

you weren’t very concerned because you knew your brother was going to choose your dad as you both were closer to him

so imagine your surprise when he said he didnt care and naturally, the mother would get the child

lowkey you felt hella betrayed and when your dad whisked you away overseas, there was this grudge you held against toshi

yall youre like 5

i would be hella mad too if my brother chose the person who yells at him all the time

in california, your father made sure you still remembered your brother and you tried to detach from the japanese lifestyle to your new one but you just couldnt

maybe around 6 years you were already fed up with the hot california heat and you wanted to go back to japan to see toshi again

you got over that grudge years ago but your mother refused to have any contact or anything to do with your father and so that included you too

she refused to let you both video chat and any type of connection

your dad obviously noticed your sad expressions and your obvious longing to go back to your brother again and so he arranged something

you shut the door gently before taking off your shoes by the doorway

the large house was often quiet except for the constant typing of a keyboard in your father’s study

‘tadaima’

you meekly mumbled but his sense of hearing never wavered so he heard your voice

‘oh? y/n?’

his voice echoed through the hallways and you heard his chair squeak as it was moved back so he could stand

your sock-cladded feet padded against the hard wood floor and you walked towards his study where indeed he was standing there

your father has definitely aged yet his job as a coach made him as fit as he was decades ago

as much as it disgusted you, you could tell what your friends meant when they said your dad was good-looking

they actually said your dad was hot but you refuse to acknowledge that

you and your friends are like 12 tf

you closed the door and sat down on the loveseat at the corner of the room as it was your designated spot

‘hey, papa’

you greeted with a smile and he gave you the same grin

‘i ordered f/f (favorite food) for dinner tonight so try and listen for the bell to ring, okay?’

you nodded

there was bit of small talk and you asked about his team while he asked about school and you both arranged to hang out over the weekend at some ice cream shop

the conversation dragged on until you heard the doorbell and you ran to the door to answer the delivery man

your dad put out the plates on the table and you excitedly dug in

‘also, you remember your grandmother? and her terrible back?’

oh god of course you did

they lived about 30 minutes away from your house in japan and she constantly worried your father bc the woman was approaching 90 and was still picking peppers!

with old coach ukai

‘what did she do now?’

your father chuckled at the exasperation in your voice

‘she misses you. says something about the family’s princess needing to go back to her country or something’

there was a smile in your face

your grandmother was your favorite and she always said you were the princess

she hated your mother because of how insensitive she was so she only acknowledged you as the only other female in the family

obviously your brother was also liked but there was just a special bond between you and your grandmother

‘so when are we going back?’

you asked and it was clear that you were excited at the thought of going back to japan as you havent been back since you moved due to your father’s busy job and your school

takashi swallowed his food before revealing the news

‘actually, if you want, you could finish your schooling there. but only until college first though because your old man needs you over here too’

nah bro you didnt even care about the last part

literally your fork fell to the table and you shrieked

‘WHAT?! SERIOUSLY?!’

and thus brought you back to japan

you stayed with your grandmother on your dad’s side and you quickly got accustomed back to japan life

your BROTHER!

okay

so waka-chan def heard you coming back

your mother was grumbling about it the other day and he was sure he heard your name in there

‘sdkfjkdslfjdkslfj y/n dkfjlsdkfjldkf’

LMAO THATS ME TRYING TO SAY THAT WAKA COULDNT UNDERSTAND WHAT SHE SAID SINCE SHE WAS MUMBLING SHE WASNT KEYBOARD SMASHING LMAO

there was a mutual giddiness in there too and he was excited to see you again after many years without contact

however

there was a bit of fear in there that thought back to when you were younger and his choice of not really having a specific parent despite your pleads to stay together with him

but he was going to make sure your bond was still intact!

he would do anything in his power to do so!

when you arrived

your dad accompanied you back to japan and you both were walking out to the exit of the airport when you saw your grandmother excitedly waving a sign around

in bold sparkly letters, it said ‘USHIJIMA’

okay wait i love grandma usui

you quickly ran over to her and she grasped you into her arms

‘nana’

you sobbed and she hugged you tightly

‘im so happy youre back home’

your father shook hands with the friend she brought to help drive you guys back home

old man ukai was basically the chauffeur but hes really good friends with your nana so it was okay

the entire ride you guys basically caught up with each other and you couldnt help but laugh whenever your dad would go on a rant about your grandma being too reckless and your nana defending herself

‘oh stop it, takashi. i was only given one life and if it’s over, it’s over. for now, ill live it how i see fit!’

your old family home was exactly as you remember it but you didnt expect the 6′2 boy in the living room

‘nii-chan’

you meekly whispered and he let out a soft smile before opening his big arms

you ran into them and he held you tightly

‘i missed you. so much’

he whispered and you nodded

it was def such a nice thing to have your brother again

oooo your dad been knew that you would be sticking to waka like you did when you were itty bitty young

so when you practically begged waka to stay at your nana’s house the entire summer, he couldnt refuse you

duh your mom went to see you but you just quietly sat there and smiled at her

polite but distant

due to being around waka so much, you naturally went to his volleyball practices and their training camp

there

you met his friends and you guys quickly got acquainted especially with tendo bc he was just so fun

and he was your brother’s boyfriend best friend

the others were still kinda distant with you ahem ahem im looking at you shirabu

but they were mostly amazed at how powerful the genetics played in your appearances because wowza you were beautiful

lmao dont let waka hear them say that bc they would be benched all season in a single snap

during training camp, you usually sat at the sides or you would be their stand-in manager

goshiki absolutely LOVES you!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

GOSHIKI MY SON MY BABY

him and you were the same age so there was an easier way of being friends and your energies just matched so well

he would run up to you whenever he got a play right and you would ruffle his hair affectionately

LADKSJFLDSKFS FLASHBACK TO TENDO!SISTER X GOSHIKI

‘y/n-chan!’

hell even ushi was getting annoyed at goshiki’s constant need for you

tendo would steal you away and he would be giggling to you about how adorable you were and you just giggled along bc wow this beautiful man is really talking to me right now

ALKSDJFLKSF CAN YOU TELL IM ALSO A TENDOODOO SIMP?

‘cmere, y/n-chan. i taught toshi this the other day and he was very impressed and wanted me to do it again. okay so it goes in a rhyme, ya ready?’

you nodded along and he shot you a close-eyed smile before starting to draw on the dirt with a stick

‘there once was a man with-’

lets just say

you were definitely your brother’s sister

sometimes though

you would try and go towards the calmer players to get away from the rowdiness from baby daddy tendo and baby goshiki

you would find them at the gym just doing drills and at the sight of you, they would turn red but continue playing

they didnt really mind seeing you there bc youve always been such a positive energy and cheered them on which gave them strength

‘NICE ONE OHIRA-SAN!’

‘WAHHH SO COOL YAMAYAMA-SAN!’

you were like a cute ball of serotonin >o<

‘wah, of course its expected for you guys to be the top in the prefecture. youre like,,,,, silent but deadly~!’

duh a compliment from a girl?

dead

shirabu’s bangs would get in the way of his vision sometimes yall i will never stop making fun of that ridiculously adorable haircut so you would use a clip and tuck it away for him

this big babie is so awkward that he turns red when you whisper in his ear that you were done

semisemi baby and you got along bc you guys had a similar taste in music and because you lived in california, he was fascinated that you were in the music capital of america

‘did you see celebrities down the street?’

he asked you excitedly one day during lunch

you stopped then smiled softly

‘semisemi-kun, i didnt live at that part of california’

nah to him, america is just filled with celebrities

OH DEAR BABY BOY KAWANISHI

taichi is a generally quiet guy

like you thought he was actually selectively mute when you first met him

but you gradually got him to talk and you would help him whenever he would want to practice

usually it was during the ungodly hours of the morning

you woke up and went to grab a drink from the common room but you noticed his large build exiting the door so you followed him into the gym

‘kawanishi-san?’

you called out and felt guilty when he jumped

‘oh, hey’

he aknowledged

‘wha-’

you stopped to yawn causing your eyes to close making you miss the brief second of softness that flashed in his eyes

‘what are you doing?’

you tiredly asked

taichi dusted off his trackpants after kneeling down to rummage through his bag and you couldnt help but gawk at his height

‘im training early’

he answered

‘why? is it because you want to keep up with the others?’

you mumbled and he was surprised for a second but reverted back to his stoic expression

‘i have to make sure i am able to reach my seniors level for next year’

taichi turned away to grab a stray ball and you moved to go to the storage room for the ball cart

‘oi, what are you doing? go back to bed’

he said from the other side of the gym but you just looked back at him with a tired grin

‘meh, i want to spend time with you, senpai’

you reasoned

he shook his head before walking over to you then ruffled your hair

‘no wonder youre so tiny. you dont sleep enough and let your body grow’

yep that was the closest youve gotten to taichi joking with you

usually, hes training and when hes in the zone, nothing else has his attention but the ball

maybe thats why the others ahem goshiki has said that he was very scary

his game face was practically a mean face

basically you spent the entire training camp with them and then soon, you were going back to school

duh everyone hmm maybe not shirabu bc he most definitely read the school book of rules thought you would be going to shiratorizawa with them

but you broke the news to them one afternoon and imagine the tears from both tendo and goshiki

‘WHHYYYY!!!!’

‘NOOO!!!!!’

‘why can’t you?’

semi asked and you were about to answer when shirabu beat you to it

‘the school doesnt allow late transfers’

oh right

the american school system was set in a different schedule than a japanese school system

it was considered the summer for them yet school already started a few months ago

since shiratorizawa was a very academically and physically prestigious school, they refused anyone who would potentially be late or behind their curriculum

‘so where ya headed to then, chibi?’

tendou pouted and you leaned against his arm

‘hmm some school named aoba johsai? i dont know its near my grannie’s so that’s all that mattered’

oh dear

USHIJIMA NO Y/N WILL NOT ASK TOORU TO GO TO SHIRATORIZAWA

they consider seijoh a rival bc theyve played against them practically in every prefecture tournament and they were worried for that infamous setter

‘ne, y/n-chan, promise us that you won’t be swept away by them! especially a guy named oikawa tooru!’

uhhh

well

tendou’s warning was kinda ignored bc you ended up being seijoh’s manager

hehe

surprise?

but they weren’t really really shocked tho bc they knew you liked volleyball so you would naturally be in the volleyball team

even as a manager

meanwhile in seijohhh

OooOOOoOoOooooo sEiJOOhHHHH~~~~~~

okay so you were actually registered under your father’s last name usui rather than the ushijima last name

therefore you werent exactly immediately known as HEY! USHIJIMA’S SISTER!

you still became the manager the way you did as mentioned in part 1

and you still are their adorable baby manager

you were aware of their oikawa’s hatred for wakawaka so you try not to talk about him even though youre literally the closest person to him

was it traitorous?

maybe

but you actually even help them when they practice

duh the boys are like eyebrow raise emoji

‘wow youre really into volleyball, huh, manager-chan?’

matsukawa commented and you just smiled

‘hmm, my family likes it so ive picked up a thing or two’

LMAO

little do they know your brother is literally the best volleyball player around and is a member of the under 19 team and your father is a volleyball coach in america and would someday be someone iwaizumi hajime (19) would apprentice under

there was a lot of times you thought you would slip up like your home screen was of you and waka but youve been careful to cover it up

BUT

you cant always be sneaky

it was during the first day of the tournament and you were filling up their water bottles I SWEAR WHY IS MANAGER-CHAN ALWAYS FILLING UP WATER BOTTLES when you found a familiar bunch of boys at the end of the hallway just chatting

you havent seen tendou and the boys in so long so you placed the bottles down and rushed over there so quickly

‘TOMUTOMU!’

you shouted and the oddly-haired boy turned and he gasped before grabbing you into a large hug

this grabbed tendou’s attention and he cheered then hugged you too

your giggles and happy cheers were so infectous and they just absolutely missed you so much

these tall boys were at a advantage so someone scooped you up and you were just affectionately being talked to and hugged and LKDSJFSLDFJ SO LUCKY SO LOVED

meanwhile

the plant babies were wondering where the heck you went to

‘y/n-chan?! where is she?!’

oikawa panicked quickly while iwaizumi hit him to shut up

‘be quiet! you won’t find her if you’re too busy freaking out!’

‘ill find her’

matsukawa volunteered and they nodded, feeling at ease of him being capable to find you if you were in trouble

but when he returned empty-handed and with large eyes, they knew something was up

they ran behind mattsun to stop and copy his shocked expression at the sight in front of them

is that

you?

with

shi

oh my god

‘y/n-chan!’

oikawa shouted, being the first to speak

you jumped and your own eyes widened

‘oh. oh no’

you mumbled

the others were so stunned and seijoh itself was so hard to make speechless but they were just shocked

period

‘what is happening’

iwaizumi mumbled

yea the others were just shocked period

‘hey guys’

you waved and you motioned them closer

‘uhh,,, well,,, um they are my friends’

you smiled uneasily and they could see that

‘aaand?’

oikawa signalled you to say everything bc he knew it wasnt the whole story

you sighed

‘ushi,,, jima is my brother’

you mumbled the last part

but they heard you

‘HAH?!’

you cringed and the shira boys were about to move to protect you but they saw you glare at them

‘what? what about it? hes my brother? and?’

you babbled

‘but,, why are you,, in seijoh? dont get me wrong! its just,, youd naturally go to shiratorizawa right?’

mattsun waved his hands around and asked the question thats bugging the team

‘i came to the country late’

‘THE COUNTRY?!’

well,,

turns out you havent exactly told them everything about you yet :/

even when youve cleared the air and introduced waka as your brother, seijoh still didnt say anything

they were stuck in this shocked and surprised moment even at the end of the day and when you went straight to the shiratorizawa team,

they watched with wide eyes as you laughed with goshiki and was jumping around with tendou

‘AH! TOMU! MY HAIR!’

‘TORI-SAN! SATORI-SAN! TAKE THAT!’

wow you were actually really beautiful when youre happy

‘i dont think ive seen her this happy with this much energy’

makki said and they nodded

it was true

you were usually calm and collected and was the perfect balance to this chaotic team

so seeing you so free and loose with them was so refreshing, even if it was with damn ushiwaka

you finally went back to the seijoh boys and they all sent glares to the violet team before sending you a smile

‘you ready to go, manager-chan?’

watari ruffled your hair before handing you your bag to start walking to the bus

‘yea. lets go home’

as you all walked, oikawa was already starting his tantrum

‘y/n-chan~! why aren’t you that happy around us? are we not enough for you?’

oikawa whined and pouted

but you just turned to smiled at him and stopped walking to pat his head

‘im not their manager, therefore im not pressured to act like anyone except as a friend and a spectator. but i try to be as professional as i can with you guys to make sure you dont appear bad to others. and you guys are perfectly chaotic enough, adding me into the mix will just about kill coach’

oikawa didnt seem satisfied though

‘but! thats not fair! they get to see you smile and i dont!’

iwaizumi growled at him to be quiet but you beat him to it

well

you smiled at tooru but your eyes shone maliciously

‘i knew you would act like this, oikawa-san. as punishment, i gave nii-chan your phone number. good luck avoiding him now’

oikawa screamed

a/n: AAWWWWW LETS NOT KILL COACH IRIHATA OKAY? HES LIKE OUR GRANPAPA AND PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE LEAVE OIKAWA ALONE WAKAWAKA-KUN!

598 notes · View notes

ncssian · 3 years

Text

A Favor: Part Seventeen

Nessian Modern AU

Masterlist

a/n: 70% of this fic is written on my phone lying on my side in bed while using swipe typing bc im too lazy to type out words and it shows

TW: discussion of SA

***

Nesta has an easier time adjusting to a third person in the cabin than she thought she would. Maybe it’s because Azriel indeed minds his business, and half the time Nesta isn’t aware he’s there at all.

Cassian seems to be more irritated by it than anyone else—not his brother, of course, but the fact that he and Nesta no longer exist in their own little bubble. Which is how he ends up at Nesta’s apartment with an overnight bag, sprawled out stomach-down on her mattress while she gets ready for bed.

“TV show or movie?” he asks, clicking through her laptop. Shows are Nesta’s thing and movies are Cassian’s; she feels generous enough tonight to say, “Movie.”

“Thank god,” he mutters, typing something on the laptop. “There’s a Turkish horror flick that I was saving for you.”

“Where do you even find these films?” Grabbing her hairbrush, she flops onto the bed beside him and starts brushing out her brassy locks. Before he can answer, Nesta’s phone buzzes from the stool she uses as a bedside table. Feyre’s name flashes on the screen.

Nesta frowns, but picks up without a second thought. “What is it?”

“Nothing serious,” her sister replies. “Just checking in.”

Before Cassian, Nesta didn’t very much understand the purpose of “checking in” without reason. Now she empathizes with Feyre a little. “I’m fine,” she says.

Deciding she can do better than that, she adds, “Cassian and I are about to start a movie.”

“Is it his choice? I’m so sorry for you.”

Nesta peeks over to where Cassian is still intently searching for his obscure movie and smiles a little. “I like Turkish horror,” she replies.

Cassian overhears and grins approvingly.

“Well, I’m looking at wedding dresses with Rhys so he can prepare for when he inevitably proposes,” Feyre says. “In case you wanted to know.”

Nesta did not particularly want to know, but she doesn’t say this. “Sounds fun. Is that it?”

“For what?”

“This conversation.”

Feyre sighs over the line. “Yes, I’ll let you go now. Thanks for picking up.”

The bar is in hell, Nesta thinks. Mostly because she put it there, but she still feels embarrassed to be congratulated over such small things. “Thanks for keeping it short.”

She’s about to hang up when she hears a male voice speak up in the background, and Feyre interrupts, “Wait—before you go, can you tell Cassian to call Rhys back? He wants Cass’s help picking a new team leader for the Italy project.”

Nesta has no idea what that is, but she says, “Sure, fine.” They say their goodbyes and hang up.

“What’d she want?” Cassian says without looking over at her.

“She said Rhys wants you to call him about the Italy project.”

Cassian turns toward her, half sitting up. “Really? What for?”

“Something about picking a team leader.” She returns to brushing her hair. “Why? What’s the Italy project?”

“Something I thought we put aside for good,” he grumbles. “It’s a year-long overseas project in Milan. Rhys thinks it’s gonna bring in a shit ton of money.”

“Sounds big. What do you have to do with it, though?” She’s never heard of Cassian being involved in Night Court’s international operations, even though he takes on more work than the usual employee.

Cassian shrugs, going back to movie searching. “He wanted me to be the one leading the team, and I guess he still feels petty about me turning him down. Honestly, choosing team leaders outside of my department isn’t even part of my jurisdiction.”

Nesta hesitates. “He offered you the job? When?” She didn’t know this.

“On New Year’s.”

“And you turned it down?”

“Yeah.” Cassian clicks on a link that looks like it’ll plant fifteen different viruses in Nesta’s laptop. “Found the movie,” he says.

“Why would you do that?” Nesta demands.

“The movie?”

“The job offer! Why would you turn down such a big opportunity without even telling me?”

Cassian laughs in confusion. “Are you angry right now?”

She’s astonished at his nonchalance. “Cassian,” she says. “It’s Italy.”

Italy with the art and history and seaside beauty—it’s on their top five places to see before they die.

“It’s Milan,” he says like there’s a difference, “and it’s an entire year away from you.” He shakes his head, sitting up to face her. “Are you out of your mind?”

She goes still. “Don’t tell me you said no because of me.”

“Of course I said no because of you.”

“It’s your dream job!” she bursts. “Traveling, exploring, being on your own—”

“Those are our dreams. I made those plans with you. The hell am I supposed to do all the way in Italy without you?”

“You sound codependent,” she retorts.

He narrows his brows. “Like you wouldn’t do the same thing in my position?”

He’s right, of course. Nesta would do the exact same thing for him. But Nesta and Cassian are not the same, and they both know it. “You can’t make that comparison,” she sighs.

“Why not?” he demands.

“Because—” She struggles to put it into words. “I would give up a long distance job for you because it would be worth it. You’re worth it. It doesn’t work the other way around.”

“Again: why the fuck not?”

So he’s really going to make her spell it out. “Because you’re a good boyfriend. You’re affectionate and caring, you always go the extra mile for those you love, and you come with all these free perks. It’s a great deal. And I’m not anything terrible, but I’m the bare minimum compared to you. Why would you give up Italy for the bare minimum?”

Cassian looks at her in disbelief. “I don’t even know how you can say so many wrong things in a row.”

“He’s blinded by love,” Nesta mutters to herself.

“First of all,” he holds up a finger, “I don’t know where you learned to compare yourself to me, but I don’t like it. You make it sound like I need to be paid back for every half-decent thing I do, and that is not the case at all.”

“Of course you think that,” she says. “You wouldn’t be a good person if you didn’t.”

“Then let me be a blunt person.” He puts a hand on her knee and looks her in the eye. “You will never be like me. Very few people are; you can’t take it personally.”

“Oh my god.” Her eyes might roll out of her head.

“But you’re not the bare minimum. Not even close.” He states it like an undeniable fact.

“How so?” she challenges.

“Like how Elain told me about this boy who broke her heart in her high school, and how the next day he walked into class in a leg cast. And how she just knew you had something to do with it, and you two had a huge fight about it that lasted a week.”

Nesta does not enjoy that memory being brought up. Elain called her a psychopath for the incident, and to save her feelings, Nesta (rather unconvincingly) said it had been an accident.

“I didn’t push anybody into a creek,” she maintains the lie. “Sometimes people just fall down there.”

“To be fair, you’re a lot more stable now than you were then. Now when people hurt those you care about, you find sneakier ways to hurt them back. Don’t you?”

“I do not,” Nesta defends.

“Really? Because Eris texted me earlier saying you’ve been ignoring him since New Year’s, and he’s starting to get worried that you have something heinous planned for him. I asked him why he would ever think such a thing of you.” Cassian leans forward and rests his chin on her shoulder. “Why would he think such a thing of you, Nesta?”

Cassian looks pretty well off from here, doesn’t he? She remembers Eris’s smug face. Did you know Rhysand’s parents found him sleeping in the streets?

“Because he said a bad thing,” Nesta says, looking down at her fingernails. “And I have an unfortunate reputation at school for getting back at people who say bad things.” Like the time Brian O’Connell made jokes about a rape trial the class was studying, and then couldn’t find an internship at a single firm the following summer.

“And what did he say? Because I can’t imagine he would directly insult you. He actually likes you, ass that he is.” His face is warm so close to her neck.

She looks away. “I won’t repeat it.”

That seems to be all Cassian needs to get an idea of what Eris said. “And how long are you planning on holding it against him?”

“Forever.”

“That’s what I thought.”

Nesta meets the eyes that haven’t left her face this entire time and snorts. “What’s your point?” Seriously, she’s starting to redden at how close he is.

He buries his face in her neck, his stubble rasping against the sensitive skin there. “The point is that you also do a lot for the people you love. Just in a different way.” He pulls away to look her in the eye. “Don’t do anything to Eris, though,” he says. “Not that I care for him or his shit opinions, but whatever you have planned isn’t worth it.”

Nesta wants to scoff in disbelief at the sincerity on Cassian’s face. He’s always choosing kindness, even at the worst moments. “So that’s your argument?” she says. “You won’t go to Italy because your girlfriend has a bad temper and a taste for revenge?”

“That’s my final argument, Your Honor.” He takes her hand. “Forget Milan, will you? One day I’ll take you to Portofino.”

The longer Nesta knows Cassian, the more she finds it useless to hide from him. Which is why she lets him watch the thoughts flit across her face as she considers his words, deciding whether she believes him. Deciding whether he’s right to give her so much devotion.

“Fine,” she finally says. “You’re right.”

A slow smile spreads across his face as he realizes he won. Wrapping his arms around Nesta’s waist and legs, he hauls her into his lap and shifts around until they’re both comfortable. The movie is forgotten for now.

“Out of curiosity…” He noses at the nape of her neck. “What did Eris say about me to make you so angry?”

When Nesta doesn’t answer, he says, “I’ve already heard everything that could possibly be said. The shit that used to get me when I was eighteen doesn’t have the same hold on me a decade later.”

She lets herself relax into his hold. “It was about the time you spent as an orphan.” Technically, he’s still an orphan, but it was different back then. “I didn’t like the tone of his voice.”

Cassian’s answering hum is a low rumble against her shirt. “Did you know my biological father was from Italy?”

Nesta perks up at that. “No.” She assumed he was entirely Algerian, even though he and Azriel probably look ethnically ambiguous to most. “Isn’t that all the more reason to see Italy someday?”

“Not at all,” he says. “If I could pretend that half of me didn’t exist, I would.”

She can’t think of a response that doesn’t involve a question, so she doesn’t reply. She waits for Cassian to speak on his own terms.

“I went to Italy once,” he admits. “For less than a day while my brothers were partying in Monte Carlo. I was young and stupid, and thought I would never be complete if I didn’t know who my father was.”

“Who was he?” She doesn’t know why she’s whispering.

“No one worth remembering,” Cassian says, his arms unconsciously tightening around her. “I put some dots together and realized how he and my mother must have met, how he must’ve—forced himself on her, and I decided that I didn’t care about bloodlines at all. I never returned to Italy after that.”

Nesta’s hands want to reach out and touch him, soothe him. But her muscles are suddenly very cold, and she can only stiffen. “And what about now? Do you… not want to go back?”

“It’s just a place to me,” he says. “Nothing special, nothing terrible. But I like the way it sounds when you talk about it.” His eyes sparkle. “I’d like to pretend it’s my first time going with you.”

“Alright, then.” She nods. “One day, we’ll go together. It’ll be our first time.”

***

Cassian refuses to let Nesta leave bed the next morning, dragging his heavy mouth across her body whenever she tries to get up. She’s about to surrender to him altogether when her phone starts vibrating loudly, insistently.

Breaking away from Cassian’s attempt at cuddling, she answers without checking the caller ID. “Yes?” she croaks sleepily.

“Where the hell have you been?” Emerie demands.

Nesta shoves Cassian away despite his protests, untangling her legs from the sheets. “At home,” she says, getting out of bed and heading for the bathroom. “Am I supposed to be somewhere else?”

“We haven’t seen you in two weeks,” Emerie says. “Gwyn thought your boyfriend’s weird family killed you.”

“That’s not what happened,” Nesta assures, pulling her shorts down and sitting on the toilet. “I just needed some alone time.” People are all around her these days, it seems. Her body still can’t quite adjust to it.

“Well, have you had enough—are you peeing?”

“Yeah.” She wipes and flushes the toilet.

“Well, clear your day and kick your sorry boyfriend out of your place. I can’t remember the last time I went out.”

“Why does everybody always want to go out?” Nesta says as she washes her hands. “What’s wrong with staying in, being safe, never leaving the house?” She dries her hands on a towel and returns to the bedroom, where Cassian is now sitting up and checking his emails.

“You’re preaching to the choir, but this actually wasn’t my idea,” Emerie says.

Nesta and Cassian alert at the sound of a knock from the front door. Nesta never has uninvited guests.

“Hold on a second, Em,” she says, jogging up the short set of steps to the door. She opens it to the sight of an exasperated-looking Gwyn.

“Jeez, next time send a text that you’re alive, will you?” Gwyn says, shoving past Nesta to enter the apartment. “Do you know how worried I’ve been—” She halts midsentence, one foot hovering above a step as she realizes that Nesta isn’t alone. As she sees Cassian in her bed, bare-chested and highly amused.

“Hey.” He raises a hand in greeting.

Gwyn pales.

“Hello?” Emerie calls over the line.

“You girls both share the same brain,” Nesta sighs. “Let me call you back, Emerie.”

Gwyn whirls around just as Nesta hangs up. “That won’t be necessary,” she says quickly, looking embarrassed. “I’ll be outside. I’m sorry.”

She hurries out of the apartment even faster than she came in, ducking her head to hide her face.

Nesta tosses her arms up in the air. “Great,” she says to Cassian. “Your abs scared her away.”

“But I didn’t do anything—”

She shuts the door behind her as she follows Gwyn outside, barefoot and all. She barely notices the freezing cold air or the awful press of damp grass beneath her feet as she catches up to Gwyn and grabs her elbow. “Hey, what’s wrong?”

Gwyn jerks suddenly, yanking out of Nesta’s hold. Her breathing seems a little shallow, and she looks even more embarrassed for it. “It’s nothing. I just didn’t know you had someone over.”

“Cassian? He’s cool, you don’t need to be weird about him,” she tries to reassure Gwyn. “Though I did use to tell him that not everybody wants to see him shirtless all the time.”

“It’s not that,” Gwyn says, waving her off.

Nesta gestures to the apartment. “Do you want to come back inside, then? I’m sure he has clothes on by now.”

Gwyn clears her throat uncomfortably and looks down. “I’d rather not. I’m—I don’t like being around men.”

Nesta pauses, not sure if she heard right. “Like, in a ‘check the backseat of your car before getting in’ way, or…?”

“No, like I can’t be alone in a room with a man without feeling sick. It activates my fight or flight, it’s weird.” She’s carefully stiff, like she’s ready to be met with humiliation.

Nesta remembers that Gwyn has never told her about her therapy sessions before, but she knows they’re more intensive than her own weekly conversations with Lana.

“Not that I think your boyfriend is a bad person,” Gwyn adds when Nesta doesn’t respond. “He looks really nice. He sounds nice, too.”

But Nesta doesn’t care about any of that. Unsure of what to do next, she reaches out and awkwardly pats Gwyn on the arm. “Good thing you’ve never been to the cabin, then. Cassian’s brother is staying…” She trails off when she realizes none of this is relevant. “Why are you here so early?” she asks instead.

Gwyn eases up a little at the change in subject. “I missed you. We’ve barely talked since Christmas.”

Nesta didn’t realize people would take such notice to her absence. “Yeah.” She flushes. “I do that sometimes. I’ll send a message next time I go into hibernation, though.”

“You’re freezing,” Gwyn suddenly scolds, noticing how Nesta’s goosebumped arms are wrapped tightly around herself. She unzips her red hoodie and shrugs it off. “Go back inside and get dressed.” She flings the hoodie around Nesta’s shoulders before Nesta can protest. “Meet me at my car. We’re hanging out.”

Nesta knows that a last minute change of events is not the end of the world, even if it sometimes feels like it. For Gwyn and Emerie, she can bear the discomfort of unexpected plans, same as she does for Cassian. But she at least has to know: “How long will we be out?”

“You can come home after lunch.” At Nesta’s face, Gwyn adds, “Lunch will be at two and shouldn’t take more than an hour.”

Looking her friend up and down, someone who has such an easy time understanding her, Nesta nods in satisfaction. She turns around to go back inside.

***

They end up at the library where Gwyn works, in the stacks of the long-abandoned encyclopedia section.

Emerie takes a loud sip from the huge McDonald’s soda she snuck in. “So all this show was because Gwyn didn’t want to work her shift alone?”

“I just have some last minute cleanup to do,” she hisses for the third time, shoving an old book back where it belongs. “Go to the porn section if you’re so bored here.”

“Oh, I definitely will,” Emerie says. “But I’m glad that we’re congregating now, even if it’s in the most depressing part of the library. I have a present for you girls.” She hands Nesta her drink so she can dig around in her purse.

Nesta personally has no complaints. The library is quiet, it smells of paper and old ink, and it holds all her favorite books. It’s almost better than staying in.

Emerie successfully pulls out a handful of folded and wrinkled papers from her bag, smoothing them out as best she can. “One for each of us,” she says, passing the papers around.

Nesta takes her paper and stares at the header. Gwyn is the first to speak. “Pole dancing classes?”

“Why?” Nesta says.

“Well, I originally offered them to Justinian and Isaac but they said no—”

“It’s really not for me,” Gwyn interrupts, trying to pass the registration form back to Emerie. “Sorry.”

Nesta doesn’t give her form back.

“Look,” Emerie says. “I get the hesitation. We’re a handful of boring bitches who hate having fun. But don’t you think that has to change at some point?”

“I’ve known you guys a month,” Gwyn retorts. “We’ve only been boring bitches for a month. This is too much.” She turns to Nesta for help.

Nesta is still staring at the paper. Dancing—on a pole, yes, but it’s still dancing. “I’ll do it,” she says.

Gwyn looks betrayed and Emerie looks elated. “Really?” She hops up and down. “That’s two against one, Gwyn. You have to do it, too.”

Gwyn’s cheeks are turning red in frustration. “You can’t just force this on me—”

“Gwyneth,” a sharp voice interrupts their conversation. Nesta spins around to find a young woman with dark skin and bleached white curls heading in their direction, a stack of books in her arms.

She halts before Nesta and glares. “No food or drink in the library.” She looks pointedly at the 32-ounce in her hand.

“It’s not mine.” Nesta shoves the drink back to Emerie.

But the librarian has turned to Gwyn, who hides the dance class form behind her back. “And what are you doing here?” she demands.

“Just putting up a few books, Merrill,” Gwyn answers quickly.

“While socializing?” the woman named Merrill sneers.

“We were just asking for help finding the romance section. Is that a problem?” Emerie crosses her arms and steps forward, letting a little of her beautiful deadliness slip into her stance. It’s the deadliness of someone at the top of her law class, someone who will graduate in a few months with all the power she could want in the palm of her hand. Nesta gets a rush from playing the lawyer game, too, but she’s never had the kind of ambition that Emerie has. Emerie is a shark sitting around in a small pond.

Merrill is not impressed. She snatches the styrofoam cup dangling from Emerie’s hand and tosses it in the nearby trash can. She turns back to Gwyn. “Hand your badge over and clock out.”

“But I’m not done yet—”

“Now.”

“Okay,” she squeaks. She pulls her ID badge off her neck and hands it to Merrill.

Nesta gapes in disbelief. Before she can speak up, Merrill says, “No loitering in the library. If you don’t have anything you need to check out, leave.” With one final judgmental look, she turns down an aisle of dusty books and disappears.

Gwyn makes a face at her back.

“That woman is not old enough to be acting that misanthropic,” Emerie says after Merrill is gone.

“Whatever,” Gwyn mutters. The registration form is still in her hand. She crumples it into a ball and throws it into the trash. “Let’s get out of here.”

Nesta stares at the trash as Gwyn turns to leave. “Coward,” she says.

Gwyn’s head snaps toward Nesta, her auburn hair swinging. “Excuse me?”

She shrugs. “You heard me.” Emerie’s eyes bounce back and forth between the girls.

“I did,” Gwyn says. “I was just making sure this wasn’t coming from the woman who would sooner bite someone’s head off than do something she doesn’t want to.”

“Girls,” Emerie snaps before Nesta can bite back. “It’s just a stupid dance class. I thought it would be fun to do together, but it doesn’t matter anymore.” Taking Gwyn by one arm and Nesta by the other, she starts steering them out of the stacks like a stern mother. “Now let’s go eat. I’m fucking hungry.”

Gwyn’s mood from the library doesn’t recover, even as they sit down for lunch at the local diner. Nesta thinks Gwyn might actually be sick when the male waiter winks at her while taking her order, and it’s not until long after he’s gone that color returns to her face. When their food arrives, Gwyn only picks at her plate.

“What’s wrong?” Nesta finally has to ask bluntly. “You look pukey.” Did the coward comment affect Gwyn more than she let on, or was it Merrill’s attitude that threw her off?

At Nesta’s words, Gwyn becomes even more pallid. “I just don’t feel great today,” she murmurs, looking around like she’s seeking a way out of the diner. “Sorry guys, I didn’t mean to be such a buzzkill. Maybe I should go home early.”

“Absolutely not,” Emerie says. “If you’re going home, we’re going home with you.”

Gwyn bites her lip, trying to decide if she wants that or not. But something about her antsy demeanor is too familiar to Nesta, because she says, “If you really want to be alone, do you mind driving me home first? Emerie’s car is a mess.”

“You just need to move around a few papers,” Emerie protests.

But Gwyn nods distractedly, already gathering her things. “Sure, no problem.” They pay the bill and go their separate ways.

During the ride home, the sky that’s been gray all day finally breaks open, unleashing a spattering of rain over the town. Nesta watches it sprinkle while Gwyn drives in silence.

“Why are you scared of Merrill?” she eventually asks. “She doesn’t look much older than you.”

Gwyn snorts, but there isn’t much heart to it. “Merrill is my superior, but I can handle her on most days.”

“Just not today?”

Gwyn eyes Nesta warily from the corner of her eye. “No, not today. Or this week.”

Nesta chooses not to push. The dull metal of the cars surrounding them glints under the rain, and they arrive at a red light.

After a minute, she takes a breath and blurts, “I’m not always like that around guys, you know.”

Nesta watches her closely, remembering how ghostly she seemed around Cassian, then the waiter. “Keep going.”

Gwyn stares straight at the traffic ahead, her fingers turning bone white on the steering wheel. “I’m just going through a hard period. Everything upsets me and I don’t know how to think straight. It’s like my brain accidentally traveled to the past and now it’s stuck there.” She sounds shaky, breathless, and it makes Nesta wonder what exactly her mind is experiencing.

Nesta knows what it’s like to be unable to move on. Her own brain has only recently started looking toward the future. “Where are you stuck, specifically?” she asks hesitantly. Maybe she can help Gwyn navigate her way out.

Gwyn’s chin quivers. “In a dark room.” Her lips form a tight line. “Being held down. I’m outnumbered.”

Nesta’s stomach turns. “How far back is it?”

“Two years,” Gwyn whispers. “Lately I can’t even look at anything without—remembering it. Thinking about it. Every time I feel like I’m moving past it, I end up being wrong.”

The light turns green, and Nesta puts a hand on Gwyn’s knee in an attempt to ground her. “Drive,” she commands softly.

Gwyn presses down on the accelerator, but Nesta can feel her leg trembling beneath her hand. She squeezes her knee hard. Even with the dark parts of her own past, Nesta has never felt what Gwyn is feeling right now. So she tries to stick to what she knows.

“It’s like you said,” she says carefully. “You’re going through a period where your brain isn’t being friendly to you. It’s horrible, but you can live with the knowledge that it’ll be over eventually.”

Gwyn shakes her head, holding back tears. “It doesn’t work like that. Once it goes away, it’ll just come back again. And it’ll be like that for the rest of my life.”

“You’re right.” Nesta doesn’t have a solution for that, and she hates it. “You’ll never forget. You can be at the peak of your life and still remember all of it. But,” she says slowly, “whether you reach a point where it barely fazes you, or if you keep crippling under the weight of it decades later, you’ll still be normal. You’ll be a perfectly normal human.”

Gwyn lets out a tearful laugh at that. “What does that even mean?”

Shit. “It means…” Nesta tries to explain herself better. “In case you’re worried that there’s something very wrong with you, I’m here telling you that there’s not. There will never be anything wrong with you.”

Gwyn eyes her skeptically as they turn onto a residential road. “Even if I never get past one nightmare I lived years ago? Even if that nightmare defines me until the day I die?”

“That won’t happen.” Nesta’s tone is simple, factual. “But yes, even then.”

“Really? You’re not gonna tell me to live for the better days or whatever?”

“Does that sound like something that would help you? Because I can say it if it does.”

Gwyn snorts. “No.” But her limbs are steady and her eyes are clear on the road. She clears her throat. “Thank you for listening. I think I might feel a little better now.”

“Was it because of what I said?” Nesta tries not to be too hopeful.

“I wouldn’t give you that much credit,” Gwyn says, crushing her hope. “But I’m glad I told you. It makes things…a lot easier for me.” She exhales deeply.

“You know my plate is mostly empty these days.” Nesta pats her knee. “That means I’ll always have room to help carry your shit.”

They pull up to Nesta’s apartment, and Gwyn parks at the curb. “Give me your dance class thing,” she says suddenly.

Frowning, Nesta pulls the wrinkled paper out of her purse and hands it to Gwyn.

Gwyn smooths it out on the steering wheel and grabs a pen from a cupholder, clicking it. “If you’re going to help carry my shit, I guess I have time for pole dancing now.”

“But that’s mine,” Nesta protests as Gwyn starts filling out the form.

“It can be both of ours,” she says, writing Nesta’s name under hers.

“Really?” Nesta grins with an excitement that she doesn’t easily feel. “You’re going to do it with us?”

“Why would I let you do it without me? So I can become the third wheel in our girl group?” She gives Nesta a look that says No way in hell.

Nesta rolls her eyes. “That would never happen to you.”

“Sure,” Gwyn drawls. She finishes the form and folds it in half before pocketing it. “I’ll give this to Emerie as a gift.” She leans over to peck Nesta on the cheek. “Now get home. Love you.”

Nesta turns red at the words and coughs. “Thanks for the ride,” she responds, getting out of the car.

“Say it back!” Gwyn calls after her. But Nesta shuts the door in her face and waves, pretending she can’t hear her. Gwyn mock-scowls at her through the window, but lets her off easy and drives away.

That’s enough feelings for today, Nesta decides. Even if her chest is swelling with emotion for her friend. It’s a sweet hurt that lingers long after she returns to her empty apartment.

***

a/n: i’m back in my no plot, just vibes era

taglist: @hellasblessed @sjm-things @thewayshedreamed @drielecarla @valkyriewarriors @superspiritfestival @aliveahaahahafuck @cupcakey00 @sayosdreams @rainbowcheetah512 @claralady @thebluemartini @nessiantho @missing-merlin @duskandstarlight @lucy617 @sleeping-and-books @everything-that-i-love @cassianscool @swankii-art-teacher @awesomelena555 @julemmaes @wickedqueenoffantasy @poisonous-bloom @observationanxioustheorist @gisellefigue08 @courtofjurdan @theoverlyenthusiasticwriter @wolfiixxx @cass-nes @seashade @royaltykxx @illyrianundercover @queenestarcheron @monstrousloves-explodinggalaxies @humanexile @that-golden-lyre @agentsofsheilds @mercy-is-alive @cassiansbigwingspan @laylaameer01 @verypaleninja @maastrash @bow-dawn @perseusannabeth @dead-on-the-inside666 @jlinez @hungryreadingaddict @anidealiveson @planet-faerie @shallowhighwaters @ghostlyrose2 @chosenfamily-valkyriequeens @rarephloxes

#nessian #nesta archeron #cassian #ncssianwrites #a favor #nessian fic #nessian au

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mandareeboo · 3 years

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ok now im curious what your most petty thing is (regarding the dp post)

Oooh boy, here we go! Buckle up fuckers this is gonna be a longer one.

My senior year of high school, I took a creative writing class. Partially because I needed to fill the slot, mostly because I wanted to improve my writing (spoiler: I did not). Now, my high school was a three floor building- first was mostly gym, second was general, and the third was senior lockers and art classes. I spent a good chunk of my schedule senior year on the second and third floor, going between an art class to my earth science (I took that one entirely as filler, but also bc I like science) to my locker and so on.

Creative writing? Creative writing was in the fucking basement. Go to the first floor, go to a corner generally used for health and development classes, to another corner, follow a ramp and some stairs, and boom there it is kind of basement. (Side note but this teacher was REALLY into attendance and would get you in trouble if you were late which was really annoying since basically no other class was in that part of the building).

My creative writing teacher wasn't bad, per se. I've had worse teachers. I had an algebra teacher who delighted in making freshman girls cry and mocking them for it. I had a journalism teacher who would use her class time reporting how Hilary was secretly ill during the election. I had a history teacher say trans people weren't real to an openly gender nonconforming student (I didn't know them well enough to ask for specifics on their alignment, but they were using they/them at that point) and set up assignments just to mock students on the take they were told to make. It was more that she was uncreative and took it out on the kids doing creative writing.

She gave us two books to read. Basically “how I write” by published authors. I don’t remember the first one well enough and I donated it ages ago, but the second was Stephen King’s “On Writing”. It was 3/4′s personal stories about his life and 1/4′s “also write a bit every day”. I mostly remember the first author bc she had those fake dreadlocks white people do when they destroy their hair and she gleefully told a story about making her son have a meltdown at a party or wedding or something bc he got overwhelmed and she wanted him to learn that “sometimes you don’t get what you want”. So. You know. Not much there.

She also instructed us to write in a journal every day, which she would check every few months or so. It had to be at least half a page. She would leave little comments in every one else’s journals when she checked them, but not mine- I realized pretty quickly she was a bit uncomfortable with LGBT+ content, so I made it my mission to make every journal drabble as gay as possible bc I was bored and she couldn’t mark them WRONG when she just stated we needed to write.

But it doesn’t end there! Through the entire class, we got exactly five writing projects. Stories that follow very specific guidelines that we would then read in front of the class, group proofread, and then have the teacher give final grades for. These things were approximately like a thousand words a piece, and I was writing out my 10,000 word “It Starts off Small” story in class when I got bored, so it wasn’t difficult.

Our first project was a character going through a difficult decision. Or... something? I honestly forget the criteria. Anyway, I was HYPE. I’d had this idea for a long time now a human choosing between peaceful death or reincarnation, and this gave me the push to write it! I had a whole thing planned with death being a deer and reincarnation being a wolpertinger (bc reincarnation leads to many possibilities, ed boy, so a Frankenstein bunny made sense to me). Anyway I poured my heart and soul into this bastard and, bright eyed and bushy tailed, handed it in. My classmates all thought it was pretty good. Not to toot m’own horn, but there was some pretty bad ones going in, so I thought I’d get a solid B or something.

I got a D. I guess the struggle was too metaphorical, or it didn’t perfectly fit her criteria. I was devastated. Then I was mad. Bc I was a bored senior who thought they’d made something pretty decent for this completely optional class and her refusal to see that really hurt me at sixteen (I was always a year younger than my other classmates, so despite being a senior I didn’t turn eighteen until almost a year after graduation)

Well, fuck it, I decided. I’m going to parody the shit out of this class.

Our next project was a fantasy story. I was bitter and grumpy. The other fantasy stories read aloud were stuff like “yeah this dude fought a wizard and got a girl, then they went home and banged” (this was not hyperbole, he would’ve written and read the smut if allowed, I knew him personally) and “this girl that NO ONE UNDERSTOOD was called CRAZY but this S@!$ cheerleader who Stole Her Boyfriend so she killed them all” (fun fact: the girl who wrote that was my age and a sort of half-friend from middle school. She was a yaoi fangirl who didn’t mind lesbians as long as they, you know, didn’t FLIRT with her or something.)

So I get up there. It’s the last day of presentations. And I present with a polite cheer. My story is about two magical shepherd type figures who are called Sister Brighten and Brother Dick as they chase down a werewolf who was drunk off his ass and accidentally bit someone else. They then revealed they were basically supernatural designated drivers for the whole town. I made Brighten mention that Dick’s name wasn’t even Richard. I titled it “His Favorite Brand is Grayhound”. It fit every single criteria. I got an A. I could tell she didn’t want to, because there was no comments or anything like everyone else’s, but she had to follow her own criteria.

Our third was a conjoined effort thing so I didn’t pull any fuckery there, but the fourth one was about common myths and spinning them into real or fake. One girl did the hook-handed door handle thing and the boyfriend ended up above his truck hanging (somehow???). I think someone did the age-old adage of a haunted wedding dress? I kind of read through those presentations.

Now, I’m salty-salty at this point. I wasn’t expecting His Favorite Brand is Grayhound to get me a good grade. I half-assed a lot of it. I am in full Not Happy Teenager at this point. I grab a daddy long leg and settle in.

My fourth story of the year is “Paperskin.”

Paperskin is about a boy named Billy with the thinnest skin membrane ever. Just full on body horror. You could see his teeth behind his lips. Billy gets bored one day and wanders out of his house, tries to kick a soccer ball, and breaks a leg. As he’s laying in the grass a daddy long leg bites him- and his skin is so flimsy the fangs sink in and he dies. I’m actually still pretty proud of Paperskin. It’s a horrifying, Edgar Allen Poe of a monstrosity, but it made people squirm, which was the point. The teacher is clearly a bit unnerved at this point, but she gives me another A.

I wrote a more “normal” story after that of a contentious objector forced to house kids going to see if any confirmed soldier deaths were any of their parents as my final one and I could feel her spite as she gave me a B.

So, yeah. That’s the story of when I tormented my creative writing teacher with The Gays and my weird ass sense of humor after she called one of my best works at that age a piece of shit.

Here’s a google drive of these bad boys, because yes I do still have these things. I turned these fuckers in for grades, people.

#Ask #Anon #Question Mandar #Life #Humor #Writing #I was a good kid I swear #I didn't make much noise and I didn't argue much #It was just this one lady

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cheeriecherry · 4 years

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hi!! how are you? can you write for baku, deku, & todo where they meet their s/o family for the first time & they’re super scary? they’re all super tall, buff, full of tattoos, loud, aggressive, mean & the fam is super overprotective over s/o & the 3 are just freaking out bc s/o is the opposite? s/o is super sweet, calm, bubbly & short so the last thing they were expecting was this & they’re just freaking out & trying to get on their s/o’s family good side? sorry if that sounds complicated 😭

The more specific the ask, the better! I’ll see what my brain can come up with, I’ve just had couch medicine so

Requests are temporarily closed so I can catch up on them!

BAKUGOU KATSUKI

-Loud boi isn’t gonna let anyone know that he’s intimidated.

-He’s already a little nervous to meet your family for the first time, though he’d never admit it. You were so hesitant to ask him to come over, and at first he thought it was because he was the loud and aggressive one.

-But that Saturday afternoon when he walks up to your house and your dad answers the door, he’s like ‘oh’ and it all clicks into place.

-He loves you a lot, so he wants to make a good impression, but he also never backs down from a challenge. So he and your dad have a stare down in the doorway, until you stroll around the corner and see them.

-You scold your dad and tell him to stop being rude to your boyfriend. Your dad doesn’t say anything, but he sighs and lets Bakugou in.

-The fun doesn’t stop there, though. You tug Bakugou around the house from room to room introducing him to your family, and every single one of them gives him the same cold, mildly threatening stare.

-Ngl your uncle who lives in the basement apartment kinda scares him, but he doesn’t say anything and tries to play it cool. The guy is built like a brick house and covered head to toe in intricate tattoos.

-He doesn’t mention it, but you can tell that your boyfriend is wondering about potential ties you have to the mafia, with a guy like that living in your house. But you assure him it’s just your uncle’s quirk that gives him the art on his skin, and that he’s actually pretty shy about it and doesn’t like going out.

-The last person he meets is your mom. With everyone being so much taller and physically stronger than you, he assumes that your mom is gonna be the person you got your tiny genes from.

-Lol no

-She’s at least six feet tall, and without a doubt the most intimidating person in the house. She’s got the face of an angel and the grace of a butterfly, but behind her smile Bakugou can see the willingness to kill anyone who hurts her baby (you).

-Lunch with the fam is a little awkward at first, until your younger cousin goads Bakugou into a spice eating contest. Then the shouting at the table begins, everyone placing their bets on who they think will win. You’re the only one who bets on your boyfriend, and you get like a hundred collective bucks out of your family members when he wins.

-He’s earned the respect of your cousin, who’s like eight maybe and now deems Bakugou a respectable opponent. Bakugou is torn between yelling and patting the kid on the head, so he probably does both and shouts at the kid to keep practicing so they can try and beat him one day.

-At the end of the visit, your boyfriend is surprisingly calm. You’re walking him home, arm in arm, not really saying much. Though you do tell him that he’s taking your living situation pretty well.

-He’s like wdym? And you explain to him that most of your friends and potential partners are scared of your family and refuse to come over because of them.

-Bakugou just scoffs and is like ‘of course they are, because they’re chicken shits. As if I’d be scared of a bunch of-’ and he pauses because you start laughing, not at him, just about the situation.

-Your family actually really likes him and find him a suitable boyfriend for you. They know you’re strong, but they want someone who can protect you and who’s loyal to you, and they see that in Bakugou. They probably invite him to the next family gathering.

MIDORIYA IZUKU

-A nervous boi

-He wants so badly to make a good impression on your family, to get their approval of your relationship. He knows you’re close with them, so he doesn’t want their potential opinions of him to sway your desire to be with him.

-He dresses casually but tidy, and while he waits at the door he fiddles with his shirt a bit.

-Almost has a heart attack when your sister opens the door and glares down at him with the rage of 1000 suns.

-He does his best to introduce himself formally and be polite, but your sister is making it awfully hard for him to stay focused. She doesn’t say anything to him, so he just continues chattering until he’s off on a tangent and saying way too much.

-And you’re like ‘I feel my boyfriend danger senses tingling’ so you go downstairs and lo and behold.

-Ofc he’s not in any actual danger, just the danger of making a fool of himself. You set a hand on your sister’s arm, and the moment you do it’s like all the anger in her body dissipates and she turns into a sweet, smiling bean. Then she skips away to go do her homework.

-You pull Midoriya inside and give him a once-over anyways, just to make sure your sister didn’t burn holes in him with her glares. But he assures you he’s alright, and he’s a lot more relaxed now that you’re around.

-Probably says something like ‘I can see why you were so nervous about bringing me to your house, your older sister seems really protective of you’

-and you’re like ‘um,,,,actually she’s my younger sister’ and he’s like ‘wot’ and you’re like ‘also she’s the least scary of everyone’ and he’s like ‘wOT’

-You waste no time parading him from room to room to show him off, all while his soul slowly escapes his body.

-Your parents actually scare him the least, like, of course they’re protective of you, but they have the common courtesy not to exaggerate their scary qualities. They still tower over both you and Midoriya, but they’re mostly civil in terms of interactions.

-Your older brothers scare him a little bit more. They share the basement suite, so you drag your boyfriend downstairs to introduce them all to each other...and interrupt their poker game with their friends.

-All of them have some kind of tattoo visible, nothing Midoriya recognizes as any gang symbol, but he’s still wary. However, he manages to say hello and all the pleasantries, and actually gets a smile out of one of your brothers, who tries to rope him into a game of cards.

-Thankfully you save him with the excuse that you still have more family to show him off to, but he’s left with the promise of ‘later, then’.

-Lastly is your sister, who he’s technically already met. She’s arguably the scariest of everyone. She’s easily almost six feet tall and looks like she could bench press the two of you with ease. You promise him that she’s a literal sweet pea, but when the two of you walk up to her room, Midoriya isn’t so sure.

-She glares at him hard, like she’s judging him about everything and if he doesn’t pass she’ll snap him in half. He has to swallow the lump in his throat, and quickly looks around the room for some kind of thing to ask about that might get her to open up.

-And he sees it. One of the rarer All Might figures from an old merch line, one that he also has, so he’s like ‘do you like All Might’ and it’s like a switch is flipped.

-You breathe a sigh of relief as the two of them start nerding out about their favourite hero, sprouting facts and recalling films and old news videos. When he mentions that All Might teaches at his school, your sister honest to god squeals, and starts asking all kinds of questions about what kind of teacher he is, what he’s learned, what it’s like to be a protogee of such a great hero. He answers everything with glee, all his former fears forgotten.

-When it comes time for dinner, your sister insists that your boyfriend sit next to her, which is apparently a very high honor because one of your brothers sulks off to the other end of the table. (You assure your brother later that it’s just temporary and that your sister just really likes your boyfriend).

-But seeing the two of them interact warms your heart, it’s usually hard for your sister to make friends because she’s so intimidating, so you’re glad they’re getting along. And so does the rest of your family! They see Midoriya’s kindness and hardworking attitude, and they warm up to him pretty quickly.

-It ends up being a really enjoyable night, despite the rocky start. Though sadly yes your boyfriend does eventually get roped into a game of poker, and yes your brother’s cheat, but you cheat too, and you’re all betting in chocolate coins. You share your hoard with him.

TODOROKI SHOUTO

-He goes into it being not nervous, and ends up being Quite nervous once he meets your family.

-When he arrives, you’re thankfully the one to answer the door, so he doesn’t get hassled, so everything seems pretty normal right off the bat. Until your cousin walks through the room and is like ‘???? who’s this pipsqueak???’ and Todoroki is torn between being his usual snarky self and being polite.

-He wats to throw shade right back, but for your sake he wants to make a good impression. You’re used to his manners (or lack thereof) but he doesn’t want your family to think he’s not worthy of you. He really loves you a lot and wants to stay with you.

-So he goes for a formal introduction, even going in for a handshake. It’s kind of funny, because your cousin is like ‘lol what are manners’ but your glare forces him to return the gesture. His hand completely dwarfs your boyfriend’s, and you have to hide a snicker.

-And then the guy awkwardly wanders out of the room.

-You and Todoroki kind of just stand there for a second, and then he’s like ‘is this what you meant when you said your family was intimidating’ and you’re like ‘:3′

-You give him a tour of the house, a nice modest place with traditional aspects. It’s nowhere near as big as his, but he like it that way, it makes the place more homey and warm.

-You introduce him to family members as you come across them; your younger twin nuisances cousins, who are more mischievous than dangerous, your aunt and her wife, who look like they could get away with murder, your brother and his friends, who mostly only glare at Todoroki to try and make him uncomfortable.

-Thankfully he’s used to the stoic and slightly scary expressions, thanks to his dad. He wonders momentarily if you’re safe here, but then he realizes that everyone in the house is especially kind to you, and very affectionate when they think he’s not looking. He doesn’t even bother asking the question.

-Lastly are your parents, who are in the kitchen preparing dinner. They’re a little perturbed that you’re both in the kitchen when they’re working, but they seem to be less purposefully intimidating than everyone else. They’re still a little scary though.

-Then he notices that your parents are making soba. From scratch. Which is particularly difficult to master, so he figures they must be pretty well practiced if they’re so good at it.

-Without thinking, he asks if they’ve made soba before, and soon your parents are sprouting off about their culinary careers and the restaurant they run. You were supposed to take over one day, but you ultimately chose a different path in life, even after they taught you so much.

-Todoroki didn’t even realize you could cook, but now he wants more than anything to try your meals someday, or learn a few things from you and make dinners together.

-It startles him a little that he’s thinking so far ahead in your lives, but honestly if you’ve managed to get him as a boyfriend then you’re likely to have him for your whole life, if you want him.

-He talks a little more with your parents about the food, expressing in his way that he’s looking forward to a dinner that’s had so much hard work go into it. And you can see the little light go on in your parents’ heads, the light that signals they approve of your choice in boyfriend and have started making room in their hearts for him.

-Dinner is nice, pretty peaceful aside from your twin cousins causing their usual trouble, but he’s nonplussed by it. he still wonders how you managed to come out so small in comparison to everyone else, but it doesn’t bother him too much. He can see that you’re loved and well cared for, and a little piece of him hopes that one day he’ll be able to get to know your family even better.

#bakugou x reader #bakugou katsuki x reader #midoriya x reader #midoriya izuku x reader #deku x reader #todoroki x reader #todoroki shouto x reader #bnha x reader #mha x reader #bnha headcanons #mha headcanons #Anonymous

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1025cherrystreet · 4 years

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New Home for the Holidays!

happy holidays! and merry christmas to whoever celebrates it!! <3

disclaimer: kinda scared ngl, this is my first piece of writing i’m putting on tumblr. i usually use wattpad (my username is the same it is here if you wanna follow me!), so i’m still learning how to do this lmao. hope you like it! any feedback is appreciated!!!

also... i didn’t really proofread this bc i got impatient and wanted to post it before christmas lol :)

warnings: none, just fluff ;)

gf!y/n spends christmas with harry and his family.

You hear the faint chime of the doorbell ringing from inside the house as you nervously pick at your fingers down at your side. Harry notices the small action, quickly taking your hand to intertwine with his, shooting you a small smile in hopes to calm your nerves.

And it does. For a moment. Until the door swings open and Anne appears on the other side. What finally does put your anxiety to rest is the big, warm hug she pulls you into, a splitting grin adorning her face. You chuckle in surprise (mostly at the fact she hugged you first and not her own son), but return the kind action, nonetheless.

"Oh my gosh! Y/N, my dear, you look gorgeous as always!" She says pulling back just enough to look at your face.

"Thank you! You're looking quite good yourself, Mrs. Twist." You return either a kind smile.

"Oh, none of that. I've told you before, call me Anne," She looks at you with a knowing and playful scowl, waving you off.

"Wow, hello to you too mum," Harry mutters from next to you, plastering a fake pout on his lips.

She softly scoffs, releasing her hold on you and moving to embrace her son.

"You look gorgeous too, Harry. Is that what you wanted to hear?" She jokes, the familiar smirk she holds reminds you of the one your boyfriend pulls so frequently.

When they release from their tight squeeze, Anne steps inside and holds the door open before speaking.

"Well... Don't want you two to freeze out there, come in! I was just fixing a cuppa,"

The warmth of her home heats your frozen fingertips as you enter and your glad to be out of the snow. You love the snow, but since growing up not experiencing it often where you lived makes it a little hard to bear in times like these. You couldn't remember many times you've had a white Christmas before (probably could count on one hand, if your honest), but you've always remembered them being the best ones.

You've always loved the holidays. You loved the cold weather and the time with family. You loved you're yearly family tradition of opening one present on Christmas Eve night and taking a picture on the staircase in your childhood home the next morning. You loved making hot chocolate and watching you're family open the presents you got them.

You loved the holidays. But, what you love more than anything, is that this year you get to spend them with Harry.

You've been dating for two years now, but last Christmas, you spent it with your own family, as did he, because it was a bit too soon in y'all's relationship to make that step. However, this year Harry extended the invitation for you to join them and after talking with your parents (and your brother, albeit he didn't care one bit) you accepted the invite. Of course, not without making sure you wouldn't be imposing at all. And with Harry's reassuring words of, wouldn't have asked if we all didn't want you there, and besides, baby, it wouldn't be Christmas without all my loved ones, would it?, you started packing for London.

Harry shrugs off his coat as you both stand in the foyer and you follow suit as a voice shouts from the kitchen.

"Are they here?" A familiar sister calls out excitedly.

You and Harry enter the kitchen and he's immediately pulling Gemma into a bear hug. You look at the sight and smile fondly, noticing her boyfriend, Michal, behind them, but not before worrying for Gemma's breath support as Harry noticeably squeezes tighter.

They let go of each other and she playfully scowls at him, swatting his arm. To which Harry dramatically holds his arm, draining an, ow, that hurt!, receiving an eye roll from Gemma before Harry moves to greet Michal, and his stepdad, Robin.

"Hi, Y/N! It's so great to see you, feels like it's been ages," She greets you in turn, having enough of Harry's antics already. You return the greeting, along with the one to Michal and Robin, and before you know it, you're all deep into conversation.

Harry takes up spot right on your side like a leech. If you were being honest, it took you awhile to become accustomed and comfortable to how openly affectionate Harry is with you in front of his family and friends. At first, it was just small touches and light squeezes when the two of you would go out with Mitch and Sarah. The actions not bold enough for you to scold him, but just enough to make your cheeks turn pink. Not long after, the touches turned into sweet kisses to your cheek and draping a protective arm around you almost every time y'all went out. Which wasn't a problem until you realized how many stares your friends shot you when you started to get too comfortable in his warm embrace, most of the time opting to daze out in Harry's comfort than pay attention to conversation. So then, when the little affections turned into koala-esque cuddling into your side and planting heart-stopping kisses to your lips in front of Gemma and Anne this past summer, you decided to tell him to reign it back just a tad. It wasn't that you didn't like it! Quite the contrary, the sweet scent of his cologne that would flood your senses as he settled so close to you made your head fuzzy, and the pecks along your neck or on your hands or on your cheeks left you incapable of being present.

Of course, your loving boyfriend pouted a bit at the fact he claims, you don't want my kisses, but quickly got over it when you dropped to your knees before the boy to press kisses somewhere he couldn't complain about.

However, despite all of your protests to PDA, you can't help but relinquish your resolve as you melt into the couch with Harry between your legs, head resting on your tummy. The whole family (which includes you now!) is settled into their comfy spots in Anne's living room as Miracle on 34th Street plays on the TV, everyone having changed into their fuzziest Christmas pajamas. The realization when you saw Harry, Gem, and Anne had matching pajama bottoms made your heart grow tenfold and your eyes glaze over in complete fondness.

The smell of kettle corn popcorn (as Harry made it since he knows it's your favorite) and cinnamon candles fill the room. Anne and Robin are together on the couch perpendicular to yours against the wall opposite of you and Harry as the two of you are laid out taking up the whole space on y'all's blue sofa, while Gemma and Michal have cuddled up on the floor, sharing the big bean bag off to your left since they were the last ones to join the holiday movie marathon.

You love the dynamic of Harry's family. Much different than the chaotic mess of yours, and although you still love your family very much (despite their constant need to be obnoxiously loud for no reason whatsoever, fight over little things, and ignore each other on a daily basis), you admire how calm their presence is. You're family is just so... loud. And that's not necessarily a bad thing! The running joke of your family is that no one in it is capable of whispering...well, except you but you all blame it on the anxiety. But even so, your parents and brother have always argued. Over everything. Very rarely is it about something important, and seldom does it get out of control, but your family's way of showing affection is very...unique? Y'all aren't openly nice and polite all the time. As confusing as it might sound, y'all show your love in bickering. The love is more underlying than it is direct in show.

But that's why you can't get over how quiet this house is right now. Not one fight over someone breathing wrong has broke out and Harry and Gemma actually get along and enjoy each other's company. They're like... friends! The concept is crazy to you and you can't help but get just a tad bummed how your family doesn't just sit around all cuddled up, and how they'll get something for you while their up so you don't have to move from your comfy spot, or how Anne will just hug Harry out of nowhere. But the more you think about it, you realize that it's probably because Harry wasn't around much, always touring and traveling the world. He never got the time to playfully bicker with his family. So, as everyone is quiet in their comfort, you take it all in, happy that you're given the chance to experience their household dynamic.

Your fingers play with Harry's hair, running them through the long brown curls, still as wonderstruck at how soft his hair is as ever. Hearing him softly hum when you gently tug through a thicker curl.

"You're so effortlessly beautiful, ya know that?" You whisper to him, the sound of the movie, thankfully, covering you're affection from everyone else.

You can just spot the smitten little grin that grows on his face, and despite not having the angle to see, you just know his precious dimple is making a showcase right now...and that's enough to put a smile on your own face.

Instead of replying in words, he only turns his head to place a soft, melting kiss upon your thigh. Making heat surge through your entire body, in turn, making your heart warm at his love.

As y'all sit and watch the movie, you start to subconsciously braid your boyfriends hair. Starting by sectioning (albeit, a bit lazily) his hair into two big chunks, then separating three strands from the top of his head, you start braiding the pieces, adding a bit more hair as you go. He eventually caught on to what you were doing and you thought he was going to stop you, truthfully. But to your surprise, he only started rubbing gentle circles into your legs with his hands in a calming manner, causing you to release a content sigh.

When you get to the end, you tie off the finished braid with a hair tie from your wrist before moving to the other side of his sectioned head. It surprised you how long his braids are! They come down about a few inches below his chin, much longer than the only other time you had saw him in braids, which was when Lou did them right before he went on stage to perform. Now, your braiding skills aren't as refined as Lou's are, her skills making yours look rather sad, but you're having a blast doing it and that's all that matters. Not like he's going to go perform after this, right?

After securing the second braid in a hair tie, you lean forward and place a kiss to the top of Harry's head, causing him to tilt his head to look at you with a big smile on his pretty face.

Since you're sat up already and hovering over his face with him still in your lap, you press a quick, searing kiss to his lips, watching them curve into a splitting grin. You smile back at him, just admiring his features.

Despite being able to feel the loving stares from Gemma and Anne in the room, your focus is still on Harry.

“I love you,” He whispers, bringing a hand up to gently stroke your cheek.

“I love you too, bubs.” You return, because you do. You love him so much it hurts sometimes.

Looking at him now, surrounded by his family, you think you have never been so happy in your entire life. You’re so lucky to have him in your life, and you know he knows he’s lucky too.

But most of all, you’re so glad you decided to spend this Christmas with him.

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kittinoir · 3 years

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Season 4 Spoilers under the cut

I finished the season! Thoughts below

I finally watched the whole season!

What the fuck!

I write a lot of angst, but I didn’t love seeing it this season :’) I feel like there wasn’t enough good things to balance out the bad things and make them less devastating.

PROS: - Adrien is probably not a senti-monster. Probably. I don’t think so. - With all the Miraculous but two in HM’s possession, we’ll be back to the OG two next season!!! I missed them :’) As amazing as it was to see all the Miraculous get used, I know most of us felt for Chat Noir getting sidelined. I’m really hoping she’ll let him take on more of an equal role next season, since we saw how well not doing that worked this season - ALL THE TROPES! Marinette practicing her Adrien confession on Chat Noir! ‘New’ Ladybug/Chat Noir holders! Stuck together in an elevator! Masked ball! - CAT WALKER - Kagami! Loved her character development! - SO MUCH PLOT DEVELOPMENT.

CONS: - A LITTLE TOO MUCH PLOT DEVELOPMENT! Don’t get me wrong, I feel like we’re exactly where we needed to be by now, but so much happened in even just the first five episodes (two breakups, Alya finds out Mari’s secret, Ladybug makes the protective charms, Felix discovers Gabriel is HM) that I would have preferred to see it spread out a little more over the end of season two and all of season three. As a person who hates change and finds comfort in the familiar, there was a LOT that happened really fast. - I feel like I needed one more Chat Blanc callback to really understand that Ladybug was pushing Chat Noir away because she was afraid of him getting akumatized. Maybe I’m just a dumb ho, but I feel like it was implied and talked around (Ladybug explaining to Luka why they can’t know each others identities), but bc Marinette is an expressive character who usually monologues about her specific problems in great detail, I totally missed it until the end of the season when she states it. Maybe we were meant to watch this season more from his perspective and be just as confused as Adrien, but I personally would have liked a bit more insight. Just like one more hint. -Zoe being shoe-horned in as Chloe’s estranged sister from another mister. Is she older? Younger? Did Audrey pop out Zoe and then immediately get pregnant with Chloe? I have so many questions, but mostly a comment that Zag really needs to start thinking these things out in advance. Also she’s boring. - WHY DID THEY ONLY BRING LILA BACK FOR ONLY THE LAST TWO EPISODES? - Marinette still can’t talk to Adrien. All this development, and she can still barely string a coherent sentence together. I want to die. - so many embarrassing moments they made Puppeteer two look like Oblivio

NEUTRAL: - They were almost never in class this season, what’s up with that lol - Why do I want Marinette to confess to Adrien so badly? She’s made it clear she feels she can’t have a boyfriend and we all know he’s in love ‘with someone else’ (or did she think that was Kagami? I guess). But we know he’d just reject her, so WHY. Although starting with ‘I love you’ makes me want to die.

Anyway that’s all for now!

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the-black-birb · 4 years

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HAPPY 200 FOLLOWERS!!! you deserve it ! the prompt list is super cute so could i get ‘meeting their family’ for tobio, tanaka and yaku? thanks sm 💜

A/N: thank you babes!! Just a little warning, there are manga spoilers for kageyama!! I put a warning before it so you can skip if you want to avoid it hehe

Kageyama Tobio

Kageyama and you had kept yourselves pretty low key. You were dating casually, because you were around each other a lot during school.

You'd walk home with him from practice and to school, but it very often felt like a relationship for convenience. So the questions surprised him...

"Can I meet your family?"

He agrees, bc he wouldn't deny his partner, but he doesn't understand why?

The day comes and he brings you to his house. His sister is away at the time so it's just you, him, and his parents

Kageyama feels an undeniable amount of pressure. This is the first time his parents have met a s/o of his and they didn't even know about you before yesterday

"So why do you like Tobio?" His mother asks and he's wondering what is there for you to possibly like about him?

But you don't hesitate to answer

"He's really dedicated to volleyball..." there's a finger on your lips and he realizes how kissable they look. "And I really admire that. The first time I saw him play in a game, I was smitten." You laugh at yourself, and your mother laughs you but Kageyama's heart is pounding in his chest

You'd never said that to him

Dinner continues and you and his parents get along swimmingly. Frankly, you talk more comfortable with him than he does

Kageyama comes to the revelation that you haven't told him everything, and he shouldn't be surprised because he's never told you how he think it's cute when you space out or he likes when you put your hair up, but he's still surprised

You'd picked up on all his nuances and he had no idea

MANGA SPOILERS UNDER HERE

With all this information, he decided there wad one more person you needed to meet

"Come with me," he told you while he was walking you home

Never one to argue, you found yourself in a cemetery with Kageyama

He walks up to a grave, feet trained to know where it was even in the dark. "This is my grandfather," he tells you. "He's the reason I started playing volleyball."

You squeeze Kageyama's hand as you bend down to speak to the grave.

"Hello gramps! Thank you for teaching Kageyama volleyball. It makes me so happy to see him hold something so dear."

In that moment, he is sure there is something else he holds dear

He still never figured out why you wanted to meet his parents, but from that day forward your relationship became far more than casual.

Tanaka Ryuunosuke

Tanaka is super nervous when you suggest to go get dinner at the restaurant his sister works at.

He hadn't told her yet that he was dating someone, and he wasn't sure what she'd say.

But he was fairly certain she wasn't working today, so he agreed and brought you along

You walk into the restaurant hand in hand and are greeted by a loud gasping noise.

"Ryu-chan!! Is that a girl?"

You look at him dumbfounded. The tips of his ears are bright red and he won't look you in the eyes.

"Who are you?" She asks excitedly and you're slow to introduce yourself. Immediately, she fills in that she's Tanaka's older sister (and of course you should call her nee-san)

She gets a friend to cover her shift and insists the two of you come to have dinner at their house

Cue quite possible the most awkward car ride ever. Tanaka is quiet for most of it, gripping your hand tightly in embarassment. Saeko is asking you question after question, all of which you answer with haste.

By the time you get to his house, Saeko knows everything about your relationship from how he asked you out to your first kiss, and more.

When you finally do enter the house, she quickly introduces you to their parents as well.

Dinner is strange, Tanaka's parents are much more tepid than him and his sister. You chat politely with them, looking to your boyfriend occasionally

His head hangs low, thinking about how much his sister's going to tease him later that night.

"What's up Ryu-chan? Embarassed?"

His head bursts up immediately and his hand is grabbing your again.

"Of [Y/N]? Never."

The determination in his voice has your heart soaring.

On your way out, Saeko stops you.

"Take care of my brother, alright? Don't you dare go breaking his heart."

The smile you give her, showing how fully in love with him you are, is all she needs to approve of you. "I wouldn't dream of it."

Yaku Morisuke

You were caught off guard when Yaku asked you to meet his family.

"Your parents? How come?" It isn't a problem, really, you're just surprised. He asks you so shyly, as well, you wondering if he really wants to go.

"They've been asking about you since I talk about you a lot and..." he mumbles more excuses, trailing off.

He does his best to prepare for this night. He tells you all about his parents and what topics not to mention around them. He tells you what you should say to gain their favor.

He cooks your favorite food for dinner, hoping it will quell some of your nerves (who are you kidding, he's the nervous one)

Finally, he walks over to your house so he can walk you to his. You greet him with a smile, and he feels like his heart is going to burst.

You're just way too cute for him. The outfit you're wearing, the way you wring your hands together nervously. He can't handle it.

But when he realizes, maybe, you're feeling the same giddiness he is, he makes it his responsibility to calm you.

"They're going to love you," he promises. "Just as much as I do." He kisses your cheek after saying that.

So you walk together to his house, calming each other's nerves.

Finally, the grand meeting.

It's all far more mundane than either of you imagined. You greet his parents and head to their dining room, where dinner has already been cooked by your wonderful boyfriend

Dinner mostly consistens of his parents asking you questions about your interests and hobbies

"Well I've started to really like watching volleyball since going to Mori's games."

His parents are smiling huge.

He knows your perfect, and seeing you talk to them so naturally and calmly just assures him of that.

He walks you home, hand on your waist.

"Do you think they liked me?" You asked, eyes clouded with worry.

He stops you in front of your house and leaves a light peck on your lips. "They couldn't get enough of you."

He smiles. "And neither can I." Another chaste kiss and he bids you goodnight.

Quietly, he hopes you're the only person to ever meet his parents because tonight only proved that no one could ever be quite as perfect as you.

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thejakeformerlyknownasprince · 5 years

Note

Hi! As someone who’s literary opinion I really trust, I was surprised that you’re a twilight fan? I know almost nothing except commen knowledge things about that series, and I always assumed it was actually bad/un-feminist. What is it that you like so much that others seem to miss? I’m just genuinely curious about your take on the hate it always seems to get vs. it’s actual quality. I’m not gonna judge bc animorphs is also one of those books where you see it and assume it’s bad.

In over 14 years of loving this series, I’m not sure anyone has ever asked me why I enjoy it instead of simply trying to convince me that I’m wrong to do so. So thank you for that.

First and foremost, I love the Twilight saga because of the vivid detail in Stephenie Meyer’s writing style. The descriptions are so lush and dense with sensory information that you can practically bite down on them as you read. Bella and Jacob aren’t just sitting on the beach; they’re sitting on a gnarled log of driftwood, worn smooth at the top from where so many Quileute teens have sat upon it during bonfires but still uneven enough to rock on its branches when Bella suddenly stands to rage at her own mortality. Meyer describes that log in Twilight, so tangibly and with such economy of detail, that we recognize it immediately when Bella and Jacob return to that spot in Eclipse. I’ve always disliked the movies, because I’ve always felt that the best part of Meyer’s writing simply did not translate well to the screen.

Secondly, I love the feminism.

Okay, let’s take a quick pause to let everyone gasp and clutch their pearls over me calling Twilight a feminist work. I will address the criticisms later. For now, please just hear me out.

Twilight strikes me as a premier example of what Hélène Cixous means when she calls for “women’s writing,” or writing for women, about women, by women, with a strong focus on the concerns and strengths and desires of womanhood. This is a series about building and maintaining close relationships, both romantic and platonic. It celebrates beauty, and love, and care. Bella moves to Forks because she recognizes that her dad is lonely while her mom is quite the opposite, torn between family priorities. She doesn’t simply subsume her interests to those of other people, but instead actively chooses how and when and where to express her love for her birth family and her found families. Most of the other major decisions throughout the story — Alice “adopting” Bella, Carlisle moving the family to Alaska, Jacob becoming werewolf beta, the Cullens going up against the Volturi, etc. — are motivated by care and devotion for one’s family and friends. Even the selfish or morally ambiguous character choices are shown to be motivated by love. Rosalie tells Edward that Bella died because she genuinely thinks it’ll help him move on. Victoria creates an army that nearly destroys Forks because she’s avenging James. Alice abandons Bella and the others before the final battle because if she can’t save her entire family, then she’ll settle for saving her lover before letting him die in vain.

Not only is there a striking concern with love and care, but there’s also a strong commitment to avoiding violence. Bella’s eventual vamp-superpower proves to be preventing violence and protecting others, an awesome character decision that I’d argue gets set up as early as the first book. She lives in a violent world — this is a YA SF story, after all — but she has the power to suppress violence and create peace, both in herself and others. I was already sick of “power = ability to inflict damage” in YA stories well before I knew the word “patriarchy.” Twilight was one of the first books to convey to me that power could be refusing to do harm in spite of hunger or anger, that power could be shielding ones’ family, that power could be about building enough friendships and alliances to have an army at one’s back when facing an enemy too strong to take on alone.

Closely connected to all of that love and care, I love how much Twilight is about navigating teenage girlhood. Is it empowering, intersectional, or all-inclusive? Hell no. Does it still dare to suggest that a completely ordinary teenage girl could have valid concerns about the world? Yep. The main conflict of the story, as Stephen King so derisively explained, is about the romantic entanglements of a teenage girl, and the book therefore has no literary merit. (To quote my dad’s response: “Bold words from the guy who inflicted Firestarter on the world.”)

There is, indeed, a lot of romance in Twilight. There are a lot of clothes. Alice and Rosalie especially spend a lot of time on makeup, and hair, and choosing the prettiest cars and houses. Twilight embraces all the stereotypically “girly” concerns of adolescence, and makes no effort to apologize for or condemn them. Bella isn’t particularly good at performing them — she likes but doesn’t excel at shopping, fiercely defends her ugly car as ugly, hobbles through prom on crutches — but she can still enjoy the feeling of being pretty in a sparkly dress while dancing with her sparkly boyfriend. And Twilight, like Animorphs with Cassie, takes the daring step of treating that feeling as valid.

Speaking of sparkles, I love the commitment to the fantasy concept in Twilight, including the myriad mundanities that Meyer brings with that commitment. If you have super-speed, why not use it to play extreme baseball? If you’re a mindreader with a clairvoyant sister, why wouldn’t you two play mental chess games? I couldn’t tell you, after seven seasons of Buffy or eight of Vampire Diaries, what Spike or Damien or Angel or Stefan does all day when not brooding or lurking in the bushes to creep on human women. I can tell you what the Cullens get up to. Emmett and Rosalie work on their cars, usually by holding them overhead one-handed. Carlisle and Alice read plays, and sometimes talk the whole family into home Shakespeare productions. Edward and Carlisle debate theology, Emmett and Jasper have dumb athletic competitions, Edward and Esme play music, Alice manipulates stock markets, the twins go shopping online, etcetera. The Cullens feel real, feel like the vampires next door, in a way that Louis and Lestat simply do not.

To get to the elephant in the room — I just described Twilight as a feminist text! — let’s talk about the other thing the Cullens do for fun: they have sex. Weird sex. Kinky furniture-breaking sex. Sex that Emmett (who would know) compares to bear-wrestling. These books suck with regards to queer representation, but they are sex-positive. They feature an old-school Anglican protagonist offering his daughter-in-law a medical abortion. They treat Edward’s desire for sex only within marriage and Alice’s desire for sex outside of marriage as both being valid. Like I said, not groundbreaking, even by the standards of 2005, but still more than most teen novels do even today.

There’s a passage from Breaking Dawn that people love to pull out of context as “everything wrong with Twilight in two paragraphs” because it describes Bella waking up the morning after sex with bruises on her arms. That moment is shocking out of context, to be sure — but in context, it’s the end result of an in-depth consent negotiation that lasts four books. Bella says that she’d like to become a vampire. Edward says okay, but only if she spends a few more years living as a human and considering that choice. Bella says okay, but only if Edward, not Carlisle, becomes the one to turn her. Edward says they can use his venom, but that Carlisle, who’s an MD, really needs to supervise the process. Bella doesn’t love the idea of Edward’s stepdad cockblocking what’s supposed to be an intimate moment, and so agrees only on the grounds that she gets to have sex with Edward as a human first. Edward’s hella Catholic, so he requests that they get married first. Bella’s super horny, so she demands that the wedding happen within six months. Edward says that he might hurt her during sex, and Bella says that she wants a little hurt during sex. They marry. They bang. During the banging, Edward makes every effort to be controlled and courteous and gentile, while Bella goes wild and crazy. The next morning, she has bruises and he does not. Edward apologizes, but Bella’s actually really into it. She spends a while admiring her sexy vamp-marked self in the mirror, touches the bruises many times, and reminds us yet again that Bella Swan’s whole M.O. is being a monsterfucker. Her kink is not my kink, and that’s okay.

To be clear, I think there are other aspects of the romance that get criticized for good reason. Edward does not negotiate with Bella before sneaking into her room to watch her sleep, and he does make unacceptable use of their power differences when he thinks she’s in danger of being mauled by werewolves. The text condemns Jacob’s “don’t wanna die a virgin” ploy to manipulate a kiss out of Bella, but not the wider conceit of all the male characters as possessing uncontrollable urges. Bella’s struggles to adjust to a new town feel very feminine and realistic; her amused tolerance of Jacob’s and Mike’s sexual harassment as the price for their friendship does not. Werewolf imprinting might be mostly platonic, but that doesn’t make it okay for Meyer to depict it as a form of soulmate bonding that happens with child characters. Those are good points, all around. I just wish that most of them didn’t come up in the context of post-hoc rationalizations for loathing the femininity of a feminine text.

I’m not calling Twilight an unproblematic series. I’m saying that it gets (rightly!) criticized for appropriating Quileute culture, while Buffy’s total absence of main characters of color and blatant anti-Romani racism are (wrongly!) not remarked upon. I'm saying that I’ve been told I’m a misogynist for liking Twilight but not for liking James Bond. I’m saying that there’s a reason people tend to go “oh, that makes so much sense!” when I let them in on the fact that reactive hatred for “Twitards” started and spread on 4Chan, later home of Gamergate and incel culture. I’m saying that Twilight depicts problematic relationship dynamics as sexy — but then so do Vampire Academy, Blue Bloods, Supernatural, Vladimir Tod, and Vampire Diaries. All of which take the time to stop and thumb their noses at Twilight, smug in the superiority of having vampires that fly rather than vampires that sparkle, and for thoroughly condemning teenage girls for being girly while continuing to show men inflicting violence on them.

After all, as Erin May Kelly puts it: “we live in a world taught to hate everything to do with little girls. We hate the books they read and the bands they like. Is there anything the world makes fun of more than One Direction and Twilight?” No one has ever called me a misogynist for liking the MCU, in spite of less than a third of its movies even managing to clear the low-low bar of the Bechdel test. Because people are still allowed to like Harry Potter in spite of its racism, or Lord of the Rings despite its imperialism. Because hatred for Twilight was never about its very real sexism, or the genuinely silly sparkle-vampires, until it had to justify itself as something other than hate for everything that teenage girls have ever dared openly love.

I enjoy the novels, and I enjoy the fan fiction that tries to fix some of the problems with the novels. I appreciate the extent to which Meyer has elevated fan culture, and made an effort to acknowledge her own past mistakes. I would love to be able to talk about my love for the series as a flawed but beautiful work of literature, but for now I’ll settle for asking that the world just let me enjoy it in peace.

#twilight #the twilight saga #breaking dawn #eclipse #new moon #stephenie meyer #fandom #nothing to do with animorphs #misogyny #ableist language #sexist language #long post #sexism #romance #anonymous #asks

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chrisevansgoodgirl · 4 years

Text

it isn’t that hard to like you or love you. i’d follow you down, down, down

summary: ransom’s an insecure bitch TM and there’s no character development happening here. (mostly before that other ransom thing I wrote, but a small peak after bc i couldn’t resist)

warnings: sex toys. a lot. and a lot of sex. and you know, ransom always entails some weird, rough shit, so.

word count: a little over 10,300

pairing: ransom drysdale x reader

It had been years since you’d felt something inside you other than Ransom*. (x)

*Seriously. Years.

Your relationship with Ransom didn’t have the purest start. The ski-lodge was something both of your families looked at as a restart for the year, almost a form of damage control. He needed to stop partying so much and you needed to settle down. His group included his parents, Joni, Meg, Walt, Donna, and Jacob. He told you later that they never invited Harlan because this was usually their time to get wasted and say terrible things about him.

Your group was your mother, father, his two sisters, their husbands, a few of their children, and your boyfriend, Jeremy Vanderbilt. You hadn’t invited him, however, that was your father’s doing. Why? Because he was smart. He was a businessman. And Jeremy was nowhere near as attractive as you—at least, that was what you heard Dad tell Mom one night—so, there was no chance of him leaving you for someone else.

You’d confided to your father that the relationship wasn’t going well. You’d met Jeremy in high school and yes, you’d recognized that he wasn’t the most attractive man, but he was sweet, and you just got along with him. As time went on and you discovered he had absolutely no ambition, you worried that you were just going to be stuck with a sad replica of your parents’ life.

Eventually, your father would give him a job at the family company—a position that should be yours but never would be, never mind that, though. You would be a model up until he got you pregnant, the absolute last thing you wanted right now, and then you’d spend the rest of your life bitter and unsatisfied, tolerance would soon turn to resentment and you’d probably kill him one Christmas Eve with an axe. You wanted more, you wanted exciting.

Ransom was…in a way, exciting. Though the first week you’d been made aware of his unfortunate existence, you tried to avoid him like the plague. It started when your families were checking in, which happened to occur at the same time--something you often thought about because if it had just happened at a completely different time, you might have never met the Thrombeys. You might have never met Ransom. Now, you weren't sure you believed in soul mates or anything like that, but it always just kind of seemed like fate to you.

You were trying to get out of the lobby as fast as possible, just retire to your room because the trip up there was nothing short of sickening. Mindlessly, you’d walked into Ransom and because you were an actual person, began apologizing. Since he was just a beast, not a person, he was a total dick about it.

Whatever, you had encountered that a lot. People with money were often the worst. It didn’t bother you all that much. By the time you were in your room, soaking in a bath, you had completely erased it from your mind.

You didn’t see him again until three nights later when you pretended you needed to take a call outside to duck out of a dreadful dinner. Meg was there and she was in desperate need of something to smoke, which you happened to have on you. She was nice, telling you about how she intended to start college in January after spending two years on a break to try to figure out what she wanted to do.

When Ransom appeared, he was radiating arrogance. And heavy intoxication. He instantly started in on Meg, making every comment he could think of to get under her skin. Maybe it was that you guys had been out there smoking for nearly half an hour that diffused her anger, but she refused to engage and returned inside.

At that point, he had nothing to focus on but you. He’d asked for your name and you told him to fuck off. From that moment, Ransom showed an interest in you that you simply did not understand.

You refused to play his games for a while. You liked Meg, she was nice, unlike the rest of the family. And Ransom constantly tried to antagonize her. But see, your family and his family were the only obscenely rich families there at the moment. Most people were likely in Colorado, unfortunately, your moronic father insisted on Utah. Linda was an elitist, and well, you guys were all officially best friends.

It started with joint dinners, then breakfasts, then it was every god damn meal of the day. Your mother, Linda, and Joni needed to get away from their husbands constantly. Richard, your father, one of your mother's sisters, and Walt liked cigars and card games and would disappear anywhere they could to play out some pathetic knock-off casino scene. Meg loved the children and didn't mind babysitting, something you helped with when you could. Oh, and Ransom had taken quite an interest in Jeremy.

He hadn't really been around much at the start. You'd heard he was making his way through the female staff anyway, just trying to cause as much drama as he possibly could. No one in the Thrombey family seemed surprised and they didn't comment on it at all. Your family had the decency to wait until you were all in your rooms and could gossip about it behind their backs.

But then he did start showing up. Whenever Jeremy would hug you, kiss you, or just try to touch you in any unnecessary way, Ransom would give you this knowing look. That was around the time you started trying to pull away but that was only annoying Jeremy and sometimes Ransom would find you alone and you had no excuse to leave. You would have to admit that you were scared to be alone with him. You would have to admit why.

He was gorgeous, that was why. And dangerous and had clearly never heard the word 'no' before. You wanted to be the one to introduce him to the concept but you doubted your ability to tell him no.

One night, when Jeremy came to bed drunk and very handsy, you ended up screaming at each other. He was a drunk idiot with impaired judgment so you were the one that left the scene. It was stupid, but you decided to look for Ransom. Maybe you had wanted to tell him to stop getting your boyfriend drunk or maybe you just knew you had an alibi for not returning to your room that night. Not like Jeremy would be awake any time soon anyway.

Nothing happened, not really, you made it very clear that you were still with your boyfriend. But Ransom knew how to get all the information about your life that he wanted. Surprisingly, at some point, he started telling you some things back. He hated his family and you hated yours.

Perfect match.

Now, you guys would sit next to each other at those family breakfasts and dinners and whisper condescending things about everyone, Jeremy included. One thing you noticed, Ransom was a lot nicer to Meg and you figured it was because he knew it made you uncomfortable. In fact, Joni and Meg were the only people at the whole table who you could tolerate for more than two hours. Jeremy was starting to notice your new friendship, but what was he going to do about it?

One night, which would turn out being your last night at the lodge, Ransom showed up at nearly three in the morning. You'd figured he was with your boyfriend as you were alone, but he showed up solo.

You were hardly in anything, it was late, late enough that you wanted to hit him for being there—however, manners, you assumed, were foreign to him.

Amid a snarky comment you could no longer remember, he just moved forward and kissed you. You shoved at him, walking backward until you were forced to stop at the entertainment center in the main living room. He grabbed your face, holding you there, making it impossible to pull away from him. It was then that you sort of just crumbled, you wrapped your arms around his neck, a cue for him to pick you up.

He did, grabbing one thigh at a time and hauling your body up so your exposed cunt brushed against the stupid sweater he was wearing. He set you atop the entertainment center and you dropped your hands to his pants, yanking them out of your way. His hand found your center and he groaned when he felt how wet you were.

"Damn, is that all for me?"

You snorted. "I was fucking my fingers when you rudely interrupted."

He grabbed your jaw, locking his eyes with yours. "You’re going to show me that before I leave."

Without patience, he used one of his hands to shove yours away and pulled himself out of his pants.

You were going to turn down but he used his hold on your jaw. "Just keep looking at me, baby."

You felt his tip against your skin, he began to run it through your slit, just barely brushing your clit every now and then. "Ransom, please—"

He slipped in just barely and you gasped. The head of his cock alone was a stretch you’d never quite felt.

You eagerly spread your legs further. "Keep going."

He slid in just a little more, groaning. "Fuck, you are tight."

And he was huge, but you could not tell a guy like Ransom that. He made you keep looking at him as he continued giving you more of his cock. His eyes showed pleasure, amusement, and definitely mischief. He wanted you surprised, it was why he didn’t let you look. You thought several times that you truly couldn't take any more of him but you knew that letting him know that would just get you that smug smirk, so you kept your mouth shut.

He gave you all the time you needed to adjust to him. He kissed you until you were the one bucking your hips and squirming. Then he fucked you hard and rough, and it was disgusting. He used you like you were a doll, whispering filthy things in your ear and sometimes making you say some back. He pulled your hair and choked you.

When you could hardly keep holding on to him, he decided it was time to go. He scooped you up and carried you to your bed, and didn’t cover your body or clean his cum off of you because he wanted Jeremy to find you.

Which he did, and by the time you woke up the next morning, everyone was packing. Jeremy had told your family about it and everyone knew immediately that it was Ransom. Your parents were furious, your aunts were entertained, and Jeremy was heartbroken. You’d never been a cheater so you had no idea what the hell to say to him. It didn’t seem like he’d wanted you to try anyway so you just shut up while everyone around you moved to get out of here quickly.

When your mother and her sisters went to lunch, you decided to head down to one of the many coffee shops. You took your youngest niece with you because she couldn’t help pack and you hardly wanted to be alone. With some coloring books and a wide collection of colored pencils, you guys settled in.

She was telling you all about her favorite tv show as you sipped on a latte. You’d order her a hot chocolate that she’d already downed like the demon she was.

As you looked up to ask a server for another hot chocolate, you spotted Meg. She waved at you and you were just hit with this terrible idea. You told your niece to stay at the table and you would return with more hot chocolate. After a little small talk with Meg, and a dismissive hello from Linda, you’d asked if you could borrow Meg's phone. Per your lie, your boyfriend was supposed to meet you and your niece but had yet to show and you’re phone had died.

You slipped outside and searched for Ransom’s number. Thankfully, even though she clearly hated him, she had it. You pretended to make the call and then headed back inside. You returned to your table with some hot chocolate and sat back down to color again. Everything was normal, you had not made any irreversible mistakes as of yet.

Emphasis on yet, however. When you guys returned up to the room, Jeremy was on the phone trying to get a separate flight from the rest of you. As soon as he’d seen you, he headed out onto the balcony and slammed the door shut behind him. Good.

You disappeared into your bedroom, he wouldn’t dare step in there. You slipped into a cream-colored lacy bodysuit that actually covered nothing and hopped onto your mattress. You took several videos and faked even more orgasms, your only concern was that the videos looked good. Ransom had said he was going to watch you touch yourself before he’d left. Maybe he’d forgotten, but you didn’t exactly want him to.

You weren’t sure you had a winner but you had to stop when your father banged on your door and gruffly told you it was time to leave. Later, when you located your favorite video, you sent it. No name or explanation. You just included: you’re welcome. Blocking your number, by the way. Xoxo

Three days later, once you were home and back in your apartment, just trying to work and avoid the embarrassment of all your friends knowing you’d cheated on your boyfriend, there was a knock on your door. No one knew where you lived, it was a small, cozy place not meant for anyone but you.

Opening the door, you were not expecting to see Ransom there. "You didn't say goodbye."

You snorted. "I would have assumed you would be used to getting fucked and then forgotten about."

He smirked before glancing around. His expression soon showed his distaste. "Are you poor or something?"

"It’s meant to keep away the rich."

"You know, I woulda called..."

But you’d blocked him. "Some would take that to mean that I just didn’t want you to come at all."

"Well, I don’t much care about what other people want."

You’d been living together a month when he had located one of your toys. You thought he’d be excited to bring something in for just a little extra when you two were fucking. Nope, you were very wrong.

He was irritated beyond comprehension. He took your favorite shower toy—the one with a suction cup—stuck it on a kitchen chair and made you sit on it. For hours. Not allowed to move or touch yourself. All while he told you what he would do to you. You know, if you were a good girl. Which, according to him, you were very much not.

He’d then proceeded not to fuck you for a week. Seven motherfucking days. Despite your best attempts. Joining him in the shower. Blowing him in the Beamer. Sending pictures. Leaving voicemails begging him to let you feel him inside of you. Not a thing could crack his resolve.

Well, except you pouting about it on that 7th day. It was Christmas. You were watching Cartoon Network, waiting for the bests. Thinking back, you were sure it was in addition to the stress he felt over having to deal with his family. But whatever, he’d still fucked you and you’d still been three hours late to the annual Christmas party.

He’d proudly told everyone it was because your cunt was the only present he’d wanted and didn’t care when you nearly choked on your wine because of it. Donna tried to throw a chair at him afterward, imploring him to consider the children present. Not that Jacob had even heard, as he was too busy on Twitter. He did live stream the fight, though, claimed it got turned into a meme.

Even though Ransom didn’t tell you why you weren’t a “good girl”, you’d figured it was his insane pride. Ransom would be the kind of guy to freak out over their girlfriend fucking anything else, even inanimate objects. You didn’t get rid of the rest of your toys, you just tried to hide them better.

So, the ones you thought you couldn’t part with were placed in your suitcases because you knew he wouldn’t find them. He had quickly come to terms with your extensive collection. You loved airports and loved being photographed at them, that meant suitcases were of the utmost importance to you. They lined the walls of your closet, the one he had added to his house for you when you moved in—because the idea of you two being able to share a closet was hilarious. He had twice as many sweaters as you and you had more dresses than he had scarves. In short, you guys weren’t interested in sharing closets. A house, a bed, sure. But trying to fit into a single closet probably would have ended your relationship.

Speaking of ending the relationship. You’d walked in, dozens of shopping bags in hand, finding him sitting at the table with your favorite vibrator just inches away from his coffee mug. You’d wanted to know why exactly he was in your closet in the first place! It was your closet, your suitcase! He had no right!

It took a total of three seconds before you were screaming at him. And about ten seconds for him to start screaming back. You were both fans of angry fucking, which was the only reason he’d fucked you then. Bags and new clothing was strewn all around, a chair on its side because he stood up to intimidate you, and you decided to try to kick the chair at him. He pushed it over and then shoved you against the wall.

A blink of an eye later, he had your skirt pushed up and your underwear pulled out of his way. He indelicately thrust into you until you were so, so, so fucking close. But he’d just kept saying wait for me, baby. Just wait a little longer. I want to feel it together. And you being stupid, believed him. You were just about to slip, despite your sheer desperation to experience the pretty picture he was painting, when he pulled out. He stroked himself several times, leaned over to bite down on your shoulder, and then he spilled out onto your skirt, your thighs, and the fucking floor.

He kissed your shoulder, then turned, tucked his cock back in his pants, and left. Oh, but not before he grabbed the vibrator. You didn’t speak to him for eleven days and he didn’t seem to care too much.

This was at the same time your parents were doubling down on their efforts to make you leave him. They constantly introduced you to their friends’ children, men your age who were kind, smart, and a lot less spoiled and entitled than Ransom.

Honestly, that tenth night that you’d fallen asleep alone, you actually considered listening to them. He must have known something was up that morning, because he did actually know you and care about your feelings even if he didn’t act like it. You hadn’t said or done anything differently, you just took your coffee and left for another brunch with your parents.

When you returned to the house, he wasn’t in the living room. That was where he’d been most days, just reading the newspaper and pointedly being okay with your silent treatment. You briefly thought that if he wasn’t there, then it wouldn’t be so hard to pack a few bags. Maybe if he was going to be gone for a few hours, you could get a few great professionals to pack up your closet before he even knew what you were planning.

But then he called your name from the kitchen. You went if only because you were curious. He handed you a diamond necklace, said he was sorry for ruining your skirt. You were utterly speechless. Your skirt? He was apologizing about your skirt?!

You took the necklace but didn’t say a word to him. That night, he’d come home later than you would have wanted, but at least it wasn’t 3 am. He didn’t try to speak first, didn’t look for your permission. He just climbed into bed and pulled you into his chest.

The following time was more than just wounded pride. Okay, it was all wounded pride, but it was on a severe, personal level. Your parents were still trying and you had to tell Ransom. Why? Because one of his female friends that he used to fuck told him that you were out with Maximus Brandt, a “mutual friend” of just about everyone, even though, in reality, no one could stand him. You included. And well, he and Ransom... you didn’t have the time to explain their level of hate for one another.

Ransom was furious at first, then you explained the situation. He didn’t stop being furious, oh no. He instead just changed his reason for being furious. But he claimed he didn’t care. He claimed that he knew he had nothing to worry about and you told him that he was right, you wanted to be with him. You thought that was the end of the issue.

Nope, the following day, while you were at work, Ransom texted you four times.

How many god damn vibrators can a person have?

You hadn’t read it when he first sent it, you didn’t have your phone on you. You were just there for a photoshoot, hopefully, a smooth one. Work hadn’t been great as of late, not so much because of Ransom... it was just that you knew he was insecure. He was never going to admit it, but he was terrified of losing you to someone else. Lately, he’d seen you with other people, people who—per his insane, deranged mind—stared at you affectionately and touched you too comfortably. You weren’t complaining, not exactly. See, because, in his attempt to hide his emotions, he fucked you. A lot. Hard. Always with a hand around your throat, edging you until you finally said that you were his.

You liked those moments. Hell, you even liked afterward when he would either silently hold you on top of him, head on his chest to listen to his heartbeat or when he would set you on his side and play with your hair as he answered the questions you asked about his day. Commonly, it was family drama and he would get so angry and worked up a second time that he would fuck you again. Maybe even again after that. But you didn’t actually like the idea of making him feel like you weren’t completely committed to him.

So, you wanted to get in and get out. Maybe make dinner with Ransom, you planned to wear a tiny dress and tease him the whole time. You occupied your mind wondering where he would break. Inside the fancy restaurant? It wouldn’t be the first time. He loved fingering you at dinner with his family because of course, he was just that kind of asshole. Though...you were the one who hardly ever wore underwear... or maybe outside? He’d fucked you against many buildings, in several alleyways throughout your relationship.

His second text read: now I’ve found your plugs, that’s great.

And the third: tell me where all of these things are. I’m getting rid of them.

You didn’t even glance at your phone until your Uber was taking you home. It was like watching a murder, and by the time the fourth text came in, you were livid.

Fine, don’t tell me. I guess I’ll just have to find them.

You called him 27 times. He didn’t pick up once. You stormed into the house, straight up to your room. There was clothing everywhere, bras, panties, and corsets because he went through the dressers first. And okay, there were a few in there. The travel toys you’d gathered over the years, the vibrating bar necklace your best friend got you last year. They laid on the bed with the easier to find toys, the bigger toys, but also with that discrete lipstick vibrator that you’d hidden away in your makeup box.

He really had gone through most of your shit. "Ransom!"

"Closet," he growled.

You stormed in, shrieking incoherently when you saw your suitcases thrown everywhere. They were all opened, laying on either the floor or one another. Expensive bags were being treated like they were nothing, expensive bags that you had worked to afford.

"I’ve found 19," he informed, not bothering to turn back to you. He was moving to your jewelry box now and would be finding more. "Why don’t you just be helpful and tell me where they all are?"

"What the hell is wrong with you?!"

He didn’t respond.

"This is my closet, Ransom! This is my stuff, you have no right to be in my stuff!"

He finally faced you, eyes narrowed. "This is my house!"

You slapped him. So hard your hand was stinging sharply long after. And ran away like a child throwing a temper tantrum. It took him a moment, but he was soon chasing after you. You practically dove into the guest room before he could reach you. He wouldn’t hit you, never, but he would force you to apologize to him and you weren’t ready to do that yet.

It was definitely not your finest moment, but you just needed to cool down, think about things, plot how you wanted to proceed. You realized, alone in that room with too much time on your hands that this called for true revenge.

He couldn’t just go through your things. This wasn’t his house anymore. It had been, but then he asked you to move in. This was your shared house, just as much yours as it was his. He was not allowed to just go through your possessions. He had no respect for you or your belongings, and this wasn’t going to go unpunished.

You used two days to lure him into a calm, trusting place. He probably thought this was the worst of it: the silent treatment. You would only leave the room if he was gone and made sure to leave obvious signs about it. You wanted him to know that he wasn't preventing you from living in your house. You did, however, refuse to step foot in your shared bedroom.

On the third morning, you found an outfit in the laundry room and went shopping. The terrified look on his face when he saw how many bags you were holding was exactly what you wanted to see. He knew now that you were serious about this. But no apologies were made. Actually, he said you were acting like a brat, then left to hang out with his friends.

Brat? Not yet.

You moved freely for a couple of hours. He’d cleaned the bedroom, made sure your closet was spotless like it had been before he destroyed it—but it was simply too late. You happily stayed in the living room until you heard his car pulling into the driveway, then you dashed to the room to begin. He may have taken all your toys, but he couldn’t stop you from buying more.

You stripped naked and hopped on the bed. Little prep was needed, you’d been wet since you made the almost $500 purchase at the sex shop earlier, thinking about how angry you were going to make Ransom.

You started with a small vibrating plug and let yourself get used to that first. You could hear him moving about the house, slowly, cautiously, trying to see if your revenge was going to be easily spotted. Next, a simple, but larger vibrator that took you a moment to adjust around. You made the mental note to let him know the size—he would be livid. And finally, a vibrator for your clit.

When he knocked on the door, you were well on your way to your first orgasm. You remained as silent as you possibly could for a moment, eager for him to hear the vibrating. Then you tossed your head back and let out a moan. "Oh, fuck!"

"What...what do you think you are doing?" he demanded.

"Well," you sighed, "right now, I have a vibrator on my clit. 10 speed settings...I’m only on the third and I’m already so close."

"Y/N," he warned, "I swear—"

"And one in my pussy," you informed. “It’s so big... I wasn’t sure it was going to fit at first."

"Well, considering my cock fits, I think most things would. You know a fucking toy doesn’t compare to me."

"And a plug." You weren’t going to argue with him. "This one vibrates too. It feels so fucking good."

"Enough, open the damn door."

You turned off the vibrator inside you and pulled it out. "Can you hear how wet I am?" Slowly, you pressed it back in. You watched the toy sink into your pussy and immediately realized something. Maybe Ransom would like to watch as well... You set aside the vibrator that was pressed to your clit and grabbed your phone.

You began fucking yourself with the toy, biting your lip to keep your noises down. You knew Ransom wanted to leave but the loud, wet sounds from your pussy kept him at the door. Even when you couldn’t hear him, you just knew. He wouldn’t leave until he heard you finish.

You turned on the vibration once more and left it, picking up the other once more. You gasped when you settled it back to your clit. You were close, you knew it would just take a moment. You kept the camera aimed where you were working, no longer trying to stifle your moans and whimpers. You knew he was going to hate the sounds you were making because you weren’t saying his name with them.

"Baby?" you called out.

"You are in so much trouble," he asserted. "If you stop now, I might let you finish."

"If I don’t?"

"I swear I won’t make you come for a month."

"Clearly, I don’t need you." Okay, you were bluffing. An entire month not finishing on his cock? That did concern you, but you knew he was also bluffing.

"Open this door. Now."

"Just a second," you breathed. Your finish followed your words almost immediately. "Fuck! Oh, god, Ransom... I think these toys might be as good as you."

The door whipped open, a deafening crack filling the room. Turning your head, you found Ransom standing there, eyes wide and jaw set. He had never looked this angry.

Your mouth dropped when you saw the damage to the doorframe, you would have to call someone out there to fix it. Soon. Because you weren’t sleeping with him. Not unless he apologized and made it up to you. In diamonds and maybe a new car. "What the fuck is wrong with you?! You just kicked in the door, like, you're fucking ridiculous."

He stormed over to you, yanking the toy from your hand and tossing it on the bed. He pulled the second one from your clenching center, free hand gripping your thigh hard when he noticed how difficult it was to pull free from your tight pussy—god, he was going to miss that because no way in hell was he going to fuck you after this behavior. Finally, he pulled your plug out and you whimpered.

He glared at you.

Smirking, you held your phone out. "Watch the video I made for you, baby."

He tore it from your hand and did just that. He was already hard, you could see the bulge in his pants.

Sitting up, you reached out for him.

He slapped at your hand. "Don’t touch me."

"Fine." You laid back down, dipping your fingers into your folds.

He quickly noticed what you were doing, taking your wrist in his hand and holding it. "Stop."

You snorted, rolling your eyes.

He watched the entire thing and you knew his control was slipping, his fingers were digging into your skin—you couldn’t wait to see the bruises.

He threw your phone on the bed and turned back to you. "What the hell am I going to do with you?"

"You’ve never fucked my ass, you know that?"

His eyebrows pulled together. "You never asked."

"Wanna do it now?" You pulled your wrist away from him and rolled over, pushing your hips back to offer your ass up to him. "You can..."

"If?"

"If you apologize."

You were startled by his hand whipping across your ass. You rolled back over to face him, eyes wide. "What the fuck?!"

He grabbed your left calf and caught your right foot when you tried to kick him.

"Did you just spank me?!"

"You were acting like a brat." He yanked you down close to the edge of the bed and before you could say a word, his lips were against yours.

You had started to push him away by the shoulders but when he shoved his tongue into your mouth, you started pulling him back in. Your fingers tugged at his shirt, tangled in his hair and pulled, touched his jaw and cheekbones.

You guys didn’t make out often, the kisses were brief because Ransom was impatient and sometimes just needed to fuck you.

He began to lay his body onto yours. You instantly wrapped your legs around him, grinding your bare pussy against his pants. He grabbed a handful of hair and tore your head back. His lips and teeth were all over your neck, moving down to your breasts.

"Ransom." Your hands found the button of his pants and you tore them open. "Fuck me."

He pulled away completely, leaving you on the bed as he re-buttoned his pants. "No."

You scoffed. "No?"

"No," he repeated. He hurriedly grabbed the toys on the bed before you could and left.

"So, you’ll take care of yourself?" you called out. "I could just use my mouth."

You heard his steps stutter, then he continued stomping away. Well, you hadn’t anticipated this turn of events, but you weren’t overly concerned. If you needed, you had fingers. If you were really desperate, you had a shower with a detachable showerhead.

For almost three weeks, Ransom would not let anyone enter the house to fix the door.

Meaning for those three weeks, he would also sneak into bed with you. His mouth and fingers touched your pussy until you woke up. Then he would stop and just lay down next to you, refusing to let you sleep any place other than locked in his arms and against his chest.

You were furious but all of that was going to have to be placed on hold. Oddly, as much as you two fought, it never really coincided with your period. Though, you had a theory about why that was.

Ransom, control freak, had to know what was going on with your body at all times. Initially, you didn’t know what to make of it. It was always a toss-up with these rich, white men—were they going to be insanely immature about something as small as a period? Much to your surprise, not Ransom.

When you weren’t living together, he would always text you to make sure you were doing okay. If you weren’t, he would bring you food and something very expensive. When you were living together, it was impossible for him not to notice the more worrisome symptoms—the cramps, the headaches. The first two days were really the worst, you generally avoided leaving the house at the start.

That morning, Ransom found you in bed, curled up in a ball with your hand pressed to your forehead. As if that was going to ease the insane amount of pressure you felt behind your eyes. Thing was, you were supposed to be at work. That was one of the better things about only working for friends and trusted associates—they never thought you were calling in simply because you were hungover or something else even more unprofessional that was often associated with models.

"Thought you had a shoot today," he said.

"I had to cancel."

"Why?"

You didn’t answer. Shouldn’t he know by now? You really wouldn’t be surprised if he had a calendar marked with the expected dates.

"Oh."

But then, you guys had been fighting for how long? He probably missed it.

Those first few times he witnessed the cramps, he was actually immensely nurturing. It wasn’t like he had any responsibilities, so he sat with you in bed and let you lay on him, your back to his chest. He would place his hands on you and they were always so warm, you would just melt into him.

That soon changed. You had been in bed together one morning, it seemed just like any other time. But noon came and he told you to get out of bed and into the shower. You thought you were dying, you sure as hell couldn’t shower. But he would not accept that answer.

You weren’t sure why until he had the front of your body pressed to the tile wall, his hands on your hips as he fucked you so. So. So. Fucking. Slow. And after, he grabbed a few towels, set them over the bed, and laid you down to continue. You were confused and let him know, and all he said was that he’d read it would help with the cramps and the headache.

It had helped, but you figured it was a distraction more than anything. After that, it was just routine. Not that you didn’t have sex with him most nights, but he insisted on, every night of your period, fucking you until you were nearly unconscious. Those were the only nights he was gentle.

He sat down next to you, fingers brushing over your shoulder.

You recoiled from his touch. "Go away."

"Come on, baby, you know I can’t just leave you in pain like this." You heard him start to undress but made no moves to do the same. When he laid down next to you, he tried to urge you onto your back with a hand pulling on your shoulder.

"Ransom, stop. I’m not kidding."

He sighed, leaning over to kiss your face. "Let me help."

"You can help by leaving."

His warmth and the blanket you were curled up in lessened your resolve by a lot. He found it much easier to pull your shoulder away from your face, which he took full advantage of and began kissing over all of the skin he could reach.

"Ransom," you whined, trying to roll further away from him. He held you back by a hand on your hip.

"Shut up." Over the blanket, his hand slid up your stomach to your breast.

You hated that you moaned. Your brain knew you would regret this, but your body wanted nothing more than to give in to him. It was Ransom, after all, he was a complete tool sometimes but he always knew how to touch you.

He pulled the blanket down your body until he got to the hem of your sleep bottoms.

"Ransom, stop," you scolded. "I don’t want to ruin the sheets."

"Doesn’t matter, you won’t be sleeping in here anymore."

You turned your head back, catching his hand in yours. "Excuse me?"

"I said you’re done sleeping in here," he repeated. "You’ll be sleeping in our bed again."

"No, actually, I won’t."

He pulled his hand away from you and yanked the blanket away.

"Ransom!" You attempted to start sitting up but he pulled you back down by the shoulder.

Next, he worked on getting your underwear out of his way. There was nothing hot about this—you were wearing a pad because you didn’t want to have to get out of bed for a while and you were probably bleeding heavily. How could he be turned on at all?

He crawled down the mattress until he had your lower half completely free of clothing. He was only wearing his boxers now, the proof of his arousal the only thing you could focus on. You hated this, really, you did...but you knew how good he was about to make you feel...this wasn’t the worst way to deal with your period.

He didn’t want to give you the chance to argue so he quickly returned back to his spot at your back. His large hand pulled at the inside of your thigh, guiding your leg over his hips.

You tried not to want this, not to want him, but you were weak. He wasn’t all bad, you supposed. There was that time he took you to Paris for your birthday, the first one you shared with him. There was that time your parents were sick and had guilted you into taking care of them and the house while they couldn’t, and Ransom had shown up to help—forget all the snark and attitude he received from both you and your parents. And even though you were a completely functioning adult who could do anything for yourself and your career, Ransom was practically your bodyguard. Modeling was hard sometimes. People touched you, they looked at you. And you could always tell when it wasn’t appropriate. Ransom never blamed you, never told you that you’d done something to encourage it. He was unlike past partners in that way.

As he shoved his boxers down, you turned your head back to him.

"What? You okay, you need something?"

You leaned toward him further, paying no mind to the discomfort in your side at the odd angle you were turning yourself. "Just you."

He arched an eyebrow.

You set your hand to his face, fingers gliding along his cheek, under his eye, over his forehead. Why was he so beautiful? Who decided that this man should be given a face like this?

"You sure you’re okay?" he wondered, arm sliding over your waist to pull you in closer.

"My parents think that being with you is a bad decision. That's why they're doing all this shit."

"Yeah, they’re probably right about that."

You shook your head. "You take care of me."

He shrugged a shoulder. "We take care of each other. Now, are you done being sappy? I’d like to fuck you."

You huffed. "Well, that was a rare sweet moment. Thanks for ruining it."

He smiled. "Any time, baby."

Your breath caught when you felt him at your entrance. There was something different about fucking on your period. Maybe it was that you didn’t need the hour of foreplay to be able to take Ransom’s cock semi-comfortably. Or maybe it was just the misplaced intimacy of the whole ordeal. You didn’t hate it, hell, part of you was completely addicted to it.

But why would you ever tell him that? His eyes sparkled like they knew it anyway. Still, he would never have the satisfaction of hearing it.

He took your jaw in his hand, eyes locked on yours as he buried himself inside you.

"Ransom," you gasped. You grabbed his forearm, turning forward to lay your face on the pillow.

He thrust into you at a slow and steady pace. Certainly, he’d fucked you better before, but while you were so sensitive, it was just enough. His hand wound in your hair and he shoved your face down.

You moaned into the pillow as your orgasm built. You ran out of breath quickly and since he had you pinned down, you couldn’t breathe. You began thrashing against him, arms grabbing whatever part of him you could, you locked your leg around him tight so you wouldn’t be able to pull away, and you started to roll your hips back.

“Shit, baby,” he grunted. “Like it when I hold you down?”

You blurted out a response even though you knew he wouldn’t understand. You blamed the thoughtless action on the lack of air you were getting. It was almost thrilling to see where you’d get first, would you finish or would you faint? Would he even care? Would he just keep fucking you? The idea of being used like that did not turn you off as much as you wanted it to.

He did not let you up until you had come and he had gently fucked you through it. You lifted your face from the pillow, greedily taking in oxygen. He moved harder and faster for himself, but just slightly. His hand found your neck and he pulled you closer to him.

You had yet to completely catch your breath but you happily sunk unto his hold, placing one of your hands over his and digging your nails into his skin. He was wrapped around you, warm, maybe somewhat suffocating. This kind of sex was always like this, just toeing that fine line of overwhelming.

His hips stuttered as he turned his face into the bend of your neck. Several more times and he was spilling inside you, body still and cock as deep as you could take it.

He remained inside you as he slowly released your neck and began kissing over the skin there, anything to keep you as full of him as possible. He brushed his hands through your hair and whispered in your ear until he came down from his high.

You both just laid there for a moment, tired and thinking. It was clear he wanted to speak and you were now willing to listen, which were rare states for both of you, even rarer when it occurred simultaneously.

"You’ve been spending a lot of time with your parents lately."

He wanted to talk about your parents? Right now? After that? "They just got back from Scotland."

"Mhm." He leaned over to kiss you for a moment, just a soft press of his lips that was so unlike how he usually kissed you. "But usually, you invite me."

"You never want to go."

"But you always ask."

"I mean, we’ve been fighting, Ransom."

"Or maybe you’re considering other options."

You scoffed. "I’m not doing that, Ransom."

"Well, it’d be stupid if you were. You know no one can fuck you like I can."

You rolled your eyes. "Can you fuck me again? Can you shut up and just fuck me?"

"I understand where they’re coming from, why they don’t like me."

"Ransom," you groaned, shoving his hand away and turning back to the wall.

His fingers began tracing random patterns over your skin. "They think I can’t take care of their little girl, they’re just concerned."

"You know what? Your parents don’t like me either."

"My parents aren’t throwing other women at me—"

"That I know of—"

"No, don’t even try to turn this around. You were on a date with Max—"

"I was not! It was not a date." Only you two. Honestly, only you two would decide to start an argument while he was inside you.

"Megan told me what she saw—"

"And was that after or before you fucked her?"

"Don’t," he warned. "I have been committed to you since the day I met you."

You snorted. "The day you met me? Please. I’m done with this." You began sliding your leg back over but he grabbed your thigh and pulled it back.

He reached forward then, locking his arm around you and sliding his hand under your hip. Finally, he dragged himself back, so slowly.

You shut your eyes and bit your lip to keep quiet.

His hips snapped forward and your surprised yelp followed. "I’ve never dated anyone else—"

"How do I know that?" you demanded. "You’re a liar."

"I’ve never fucked anyone else, I’ve never even looked at anyone else. Since the day I met you, I knew that you were mine."

You weren’t sure if you believed that. Ransom was always complicated, you knew that from day one. You also knew that he knew a lot of women, that he liked to party, that he’d fucked most of his “friends” and that the usual routine was to do so during or after one of those parties.

He had started dragging you along with his friends about four months into your relationship. So, those first four months were always unclear to you. But prior, he would come to your apartment sometimes, smelling of alcohol and perfume and fuck you. You never asked questions and he never offered up the details. He was always gone in the mornings, so you figured that meant no strings.

The relationship change happened somewhat by force. Your parent’s lived about an hour away from your apartment, so it wasn’t often that you visited, but it wasn’t unheard of. One of your oldest friends had had a baby and she decided to return home to stay with her parents, your parent’s neighbors. You thought it would be fun to do the same, so you headed home and easily fell back into that whole scene.

Ransom texted you every day, almost every hour. You weren’t there for more than three weeks when he showed up at three in the morning on a Tuesday, wasted, pounding on the back door. To this day, it is unknown to you how his drunk ass even managed to get into the backyard.

Regardless, he only came because your friend had been posting non-stop pictures on Facebook and tagged you in one that she got of you talking to one of her brothers. Something he'd confessed after he also told you he couldn't stop thinking about you and that he missed you. Your first mistake was believing those lines.

He didn't leave until you agreed to return with him. The drive home was around the time he told you he found your apartment to be a "waste of time". It took him a total of three months to finally convince you to move in with him.

It didn't really matter at the end of the day. You didn't have evidence, but he did. This round was going to go to Ransom if you really kept pushing it. But it wasn't like he was anything near innocent.

"If you ever tell me that this is your house again, I'm leaving. Understood?"

"Yes. And you're not allowed to go on dates with other people. Understood?"

"Understood," you sighed. “Even though it was not a date. I would never date Max.”

He finally smiled. "Great, done fighting?"

You scoffed. "You went through my stuff."

"You hit me."

"I should have hit you more than once," you countered. But you didn't mean that, and you definitely shouldn't have hit him. "That won't happen again."

"I deserved it."

"No, let's just...talk about things, okay? Instead of reacting first and talking later."

He hummed. "Doesn't sound at all like us. But why not give it a shot?"

You’d wanted the house. The shit inside? Gaudy, outdated, mostly picked by Linda. You weren’t in the business of being cruel, however, you told her she could take legal possession of several things. If she wanted to buy it at the yard sale you decided to have.

It was the easiest way to get rid of Harlan’s stuff and to do so respectfully. Fans of his books who were nowhere near as rich as the 1% could still feel a connection to the late author without losing an arm and a leg. Throwing it all away like Ransom had suggested just made you feel like trash. He didn’t understand but he went along with it.

Probably because of how mad it made his mother. You’d decided to let Walt and Joni do a run through and take what they wanted, but since Linda had tried to physically assault Ransom when he told her he’d somehow gotten Marta to sign the house over to him, you were still waiting on her to extend a heartfelt and extensive apology to him. He said it was never going to come, but you figured she just needed a little convincing.

She’d shown up to the yard sale, screaming as Richard tried to reign her in. How could you seriously be selling a nightstand for $5? It was criminal. You were an idiot who had no idea how much this stuff cost. You were a scheming whore who had been planning this from day one. It was a pretty entertaining show, even Jacob agreed. He’d told you that night that her meltdown already had a million views.

Ransom was absent most of the yard sale. He did not want to talk to people and he did not want them talking to him. He showed up when he heard his mother shrieking and called the cops because he was a little bored. When they showed up, she started throwing things. It was nothing short of what you had expected, but when she started throwing things at Ransom, that was different.

She needed more convincing, you decided.

After the yard sale that only lasted three days—impressive considering Harlan was basically a hoarder—you were finally moving in. You pleaded with Ransom to hire no one. You wanted to do this with him. You wanted to pack and unpack just the two of you.

He acted like you were trying to murder him when you’d first asked, but he came around. You guys started with the closets, knowing that would be the most complex process. It took an entire day to move it all in and organize since the house was empty, you guys ended up sleeping on about twenty blankets on the bedroom floor.

Nothing was staying the same, mostly Ransom wanted to upset his family, but you just wanted to create a new home. You didn’t want to feel like you were living in Harlan’s house, you wanted to make it your own.

You weren’t taking Harlan’s room, that would be weird, and it was also an abnormally small room. The biggest room in the house was Joni’s former room, it had been empty since Neal died. Harlan refused to let anyone move anything that belonged to his son, but that was no longer an issue. It was also the only room with two closets, it was perfect.

Meg took Harlan’s room and Joni would keep hers. Walt, Donna, and Jacob were moved into one room, a decision made by Ransom. You didn’t necessarily agree but you weren’t going to start a fight with him for that subsection of the family. Especially since they were hardly ever going to be over, maybe just for the major holidays. Linda and Richard’s room under the stairs would remain but Linda was banned from the house until you felt satisfied with her attempts to gain Ransom’s forgiveness.

Not that he was actually upset with her, but he should have been! Something you did not hesitate to tell him any time you guys spoke about the issue. Regardless, any time Linda stepped foot on the property, the cops would be called.

Anything that belonged personally to Harlan, like his study, his office, the library, Ransom took special joy in taking everything out of it. He got rid of the books, the furniture, those stupid knives. He realized the books and the knives were very valuable and placed those online for bid. He didn’t want the money but he didn’t think it smart to sell them the same way you were selling everything else.

He didn’t tell you what he did with the money, but you saw a few emails a few days after the last knife was gone. He’d donated it. Ransom fucking Drysdale donated money! A few no-kill animal shelters, a couple of cancer foundations, a few domestic violence organizations, and then Planned Parenthood. Was it weird that you went to find him directly after just because you wanted to have sex with him? Like, you still knew he was a fucking asshole, but this was very nice.

The house was empty finally, save for the closets, of course. It was time to move all the boxes in and after, you guys could go shopping. That was the part you were both truly looking forward to. Ransom was going crazy without a bed, but he’d taken to fucking you against the wall, so not a major loss.

It only took about three hours, but Ransom acted like this was the hardest thing he’d ever done in his life. Well, it probably was. You were getting ready to go out furniture shopping. You were thinking of ways to talk Ransom into painting with you, not just getting someone to take care of it. Harlan seemed to be a fan of ugly wallpaper and flat colors. Also, ugly lamps, shades, and curtains. That was the first round of replacements, the furniture would be arriving within the next few days. You had to sign for so much and it was getting difficult keeping the times and scheduling, the last thing you wanted was to double-schedule anything and waste someone’s time.

You were rummaging through the unopened boxes when Ransom came downstairs. “Looking for something?”

“Yeah, have you seen my planner?”

“I think I packed it.”

“Do you happen to remember which box?”

“Keep getting ready, I’ll look for it.”

You smiled, turning up to find him texting. “Your mother?”

“Yeah,” he scoffed. “Just some more threatening. Maybe we should lift the ban—”

“No way.”

“Y/N—”

“Ransom, she tried to hit you. And then she was throwing things at you. Look, as shitty as my parents are, something can be said for the fact that they never hit me. That’s not actually normal.”

“She didn’t hit me when I was younger, don’t try to make this some battered child thing.”

“Ransom, this is our house and I don’t feel comfortable having your mother here until she understands that any sort of abuse directed at you is not okay…okay?”

He sighed. “Why is this the hill you want to die on?”

“I’m sorry that I dislike bad parents.”

“We all have bad parents,” he pointed out. “Everyone rich has bad parents because bad parents raise bad parents. It’s been the cycle since the creation of people who feel comfortable stepping on the poor to further their wealth.”

“Okay, don’t try to distract me by saying things that only an aware person would say.”

“I am aware. I just choose to ignore it. Wish you would do the same.”

“Really? Then why did you donate all that money, Ransom?”

“To get you to fuck me.”

You snorted. “Please, you know I’ve fucked you for a lot less money than that. And you’re wrong, okay? Not everyone rich has bad parents. My friend who had the baby a few years ago? Great parents.”

“I mean, I saw their house, they’re not that rich.”

“They don’t show off!” you corrected. “And don’t imply that you and I will ever be like our parents. My mother was controlling, and my father was dismissive, and Linda is insane and god, I can’t even explain how fucked up your father is. We are nothing like that and we never would be if…”

He lifted his eyebrows. “If we had kids?”

“That wasn’t what I was trying to say.”

He scoffed. “Yes, it was.”

“No, but…sure, that’s true. If we ever had kids…we would not be like that. I wouldn’t force our daughters to model or sing—did you know she tried to make me sing? Like, be an actual fucking singer. And I’m never going to try to make them be in a relationship with someone that they don’t like. You will not hit them, and you won’t…fuck our babysitter or our housekeeper or…whatever else, if we ever hire any of them.”

“Yeah?”

“But since you’re giving me that fucking smug look, you should know, there isn’t enough money in the world that could ever get me to carry your fucking children. Fucking sociopaths is what they’ll be, I’m sure. Terrible, little monsters just like you.”

“Okay.”

“Fuck you, Ransom, I’m going to do my makeup.”

He smiled. “I’ll look for your planner.”

You turned for the staircase with a heavy sigh. This was annoying because he still hadn’t said he loved you. It had been years and you had said it, and he did not, but he felt totally okay making fun of you for hinting that maybe one day, you guys would be a normal couple. Whatever, you would not let it bring you down, you would just retaliate by making him spend a lot of money.

You were just about finished when you heard him storming up the stairs. His mother? Maybe Joni. “Ransom?”

He walked into the room, holding a vibrator that he’d torn out of the box. “Are you serious?”

“Okay, that was unopened! You would know that if you weren’t some entitled child that just goes around ripping open boxes, Ransom!”

“I can’t actually believe you have this!”

“I haven’t used it!”

“Then why do you have it?!”

“Because…” you began.

He lifted his eyebrows.

“You might make me mad and I might need to repeat what I did the last time.”

“I cannot believe you would actually bring this into our house.”

“My god, Ransom, it’s not cocaine. Can we dial down the dramatics today?”

“You know what? You should keep this because I’m not fucking you any time soon.” He tossed it onto the counter and stomped out of the bedroom.

“Oh, my god!” you yelled. “You’re so fucking unbelievable!”

#ransom drysdale x reader #i hate that i'm still so in love with this loser #but heyyy andy barber taking me away (tbh i'll be back. i can multitask)#my writing

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mama-germany · 4 years

Text

~i have been working on this for MONTHS~

this is a thus-far comprehensive bio of my edgy emo child Keira. I’m using her in a Cyberpunk Red campaign so this is her bio as relates to the campaign, so some modifications have been made. This is not her canon form, but it’s close. if you’re part of the Swordfish campaign, go away, bc backstory spoilers. And trigger warnings for, uhh, a lot.

Keira’s the oldest daughter of Joey Youngwood and his wife Olivia. Her sister Carly comes along two years later, and two years after that, her parents go through a nasty divorce. Because of Joey’s demanding career as a contract Samurai for Biotechnica, Olivia gets primary custody. Keira’s childhood, while not particularly eventful, is marked by a distant relationship with her mom. Keira is a daddy’s girl through and through, she takes after her father, she resembles her father, she cherishes her time with him. Meanwhile she and her mom have little in common, and her resemblance to her father doesn’t really help. Keira’s dad teaches her about guns and how to defend herself and plants the seed of a love for rock music. He buys her her first guitar.

Andrew comes into the picture when Keira’s about 14. Olivia’s new boyfriend, he started out mediocre enough, but didn’t take well to standing off against the rebellious, petulant, and disobedient teenager, especially compared to her agreeable mother and mild-mannered sister. Their arguments turned physical more than a few times and Keira’s mother rarely intervened, on the basis of ‘Keira needing discipline’. For the record, to the best of Keira’s knowledge, Andrew never raised a hand to Carly.

Memories of Keira’s teenage years include studying music, similarly emo (and short lasting) boyfriends, piercing her ears and face by herself or with the help of acquaintances, occasionally stealing cigarettes, hooking up with her boyfriends in shady places, and going to prom in a short quinceanera dress at the behest of her father.

The second Keira turned 18, she moves out of her mother’s home and starts getting tattoos. She moves into her father’s Biotechnica funded apartment. While her father is thrilled, he’s also a busy man and Keira can’t really be trusted to keep herself out of trouble. He asks Skyler to keep an eye on her and keep her from getting herself hurt. That’s how they meet. Keira resents this straight-edge man trying to ruin her fun, but at least he’s cute. Through him she meets the rest of his friends, all elite corporate Samurai and soldiers who’ve been raised most of their lives for this kind of work. Maddelyn takes a shine to her, fascinated by how different her relatively normal life is by comparison to hers. Her boyfriend Dean despises her - seeing Keira as a stupid, obnoxious brat just getting in the way - and the feeling is more than mutual. Alina is ambivalent to her presence. Luce dislikes her attitude and distrusts her, but eventually they come to friendly terms over some common interests. Maddelyn and Keira eventually become close, bonding over Keira exposing her to things normal young women tend to do. They paint their nails, go out to bars, and Maddelyn is always a willing audience whenever Keira wants to practice her guitar.

For a short period of time, Keira’s got a boyfriend, Hunter, whom she meets at a music club. They manage to last a few months, longer than any fling she had in high school, but they too eventually split. Keira was spending more and more time with Maddelyn and the rest of the squad and, of course, Skyler. She’s very good at getting a rise out of this generally very even-tempered man, but at least she’s entertaining. Turns out that when she’s sort of behaving herself, he doesn’t really mind her company. He eventually shows an interest in her guitar, he asks her to attempt to teach him, and while he doesn’t take to it easily, it’s not too long before what do you know, Keira’s got a crush. She secretly considers Bad Company ‘their song’.

So her life’s pretty good, for a year and a half or so. Out of an unsafe living situation and spending time with the people that matter to her, and a couple new friends. That doesn’t last. Her dad’s essentially a soldier, after all. One day he leaves for work, and he never comes back. None of his squad do. Night City’s dangerous. Something took them all out. But Biotechnica’s excuses are pretty thin. Not that it matters to Keira - at first. Her father’s dead. She sees his body sent to the ovens before her eyes. She doesn’t know what to do, where to go. She won’t go back to her mom. Skyler lets her know that she’s still welcome around them. He and Mad look after her at their headquarters for the next few days.

The next few months after are her worst. She’s erratic. She’s impulsive. She’s drinking and smoking more. When she’s not doing that, she’s attempting to navigate Biotechnica’s departments to find out exactly what happened, what could have taken out an experienced Samurai squad with so little a trace, but Biotechnica is opaque. Maddelyn shares some of Keira’s suspicions, Skyler doesn’t. The others mostly dismiss her as well.

Several months after her father’s death, in that stage where you begin to claim you’re doing better but you’re really not, Keira finds herself with an older boyfriend. A little too much older. More of a sugar daddy, really, someone who can buy her all the liquor and cigarettes she wants. She just wants alcohol and a distraction. He wants a little more from her. One night he plies her with alcohol - she doesn’t exactly make it difficult - and starts touching her and doesn’t really take ‘no’ for an answer. Keira manages to bloody his nose and fight him off, she steals the keys to his motorcycle and leaves on it. But she’s drunk, she’s shaken, her nerves are fried, she barely knows how to drive as it is, and she crashes head-on into a curb. She wakes up in a hospital bed with Maddelyn and Skyler relieved she’s alive but not exactly happy with her. She’s got lots of breaks and dislocations, but at least nothing needs to be removed. Skyler angrily resolves to never let her out of his sight again, and Keira resolves never to let this happen again. She gets wolvers, Wolverine-like retractable claws, implanted into her hand a few days later.

She stabilizes after that, sort of. Sobered up, she spends more time with Maddy and Skyler and the others, taking them up on their offer to have a place to go. She’s grown a lot more attached to Skyler. A lot. He’s barely let her out of his sight for months and she does not mind. Maddy notices. Oh she notices. The sisterly pestering begins. They go out drinking, Mad teases her about her crush on Skyler, maybe it’s a bit more than a crush, and she says Skyler likes her too. A lot. And Maddy’s right about everything, all the time, right? So the day comes when Mad decides she’s had enough of seeing them dance around each other and takes it upon herself to lock them in a room together. Keira takes the hint and makes her confession. She loves him. Skyler........... doesn’t really know what to make of that. He’s shocked. Kinda confused. On the spot. Doesn’t know how he feels or what to do. He tells her people say and think crazy things when they’re mourning. Don’t make big decisions about how you feel like this.

~so that hurts~

Keira takes a deep breath and takes it like a big girl and tells him to forget this conversation ever happened. Forget she told him anything. She will too. And she keeps it to herself, but he’s her best friend. She can’t lose him. She doesn’t have much left. So she won’t press things and make him uncomfortable and alienate him. She’ll back off. Because she loves him. She hates Maddy at the moment tho. So does Skyler. Neither of them talk to her for a little while.

At least things return to normalcy, more or less, after a few weeks of avoidance and non-eye contact. Keira actually spends more time than ever with Alina, because she cares the least about her company. They have so little to bond over, but it’s the most comfortable silence Keira can find around others. But life goes on. Mad and Skyler and Luce are still her friends. As life goes on, Keira’s mind begins to wander to her future. She can’t stay there forever. She isn’t a Samurai. She isn’t one of Night City’s best and brightest, wasn’t born into the elite. She can’t be one of them. Over the next few months, Keira starts pulling away from the group bit by bit. She uses the money her father willed her to move out of his Corpo apartment into a place of her own (it’s small and shit, don’t get excited). She starts heading back into the chromer nightclubs, starts meeting new people. She plays a couple of small gigs, the last of which she actually got paid a meager sum for. Talks of starting a band are swirling around her head. Her childhood dreams of becoming a Rockerboy begin to resurface.

till they don’t.

She’s out on the streets with the squad one night. She met up with them during a routine patrol. Hanging out with Maddy, trading insults with Dean, the usual. They get an impromptu call to deal with a disturbance in the direction of Biotechnica’s offices. No one’s very worried about it. But they’re in one of the city’s combat zones and Keira’s a civilian. She’s gotta go. The rest of the squad’s written her off as Skyler’s problem, so he gets to escort her out. The details are hazy, but when the groups part ways, they never come back.

In Cyberpunk RED In their absence, there’s an explosion and an as-of-yet unknown team picks off the rest of the squad. Maddy barely survives and Trauma Team manages to put back together what’s left of her, and she goes into hiding while she recovers. She eventually hears rumors that the story is, she and her friends were eliminated for selling off company secrets. Framed, of course. It’s unknown what exactly happens to Keira and Skyler.

In my story canon, that takes place 200 years in the future instead of 20, everyone’s on a spaceship, doing routine things, shooting the shit, and they get that disturbance call. Keira begins arguing with Dean about his treating her like a pet. Maddy knocks her out to make everyone’s lives easier, and Skyler leaves with her. She’s given an oxygen mask while she’s out cold to make the transition to the smaller ship easier. While Skyler’s bringing her back to base, he begins feeling faint and passes out. When Keira comes to, and sees Skyler unconscious, she knows something is deeply wrong, and manages to pilot them to a civilian hospital, not the base. Not on her life.

Skyler is sequestered and once he comes to, is told that the rest of his teammates are dead. There was an accident on the ship after he left. The reality is, time-release gas canisters were planted in the air ducts to dull their senses and knock them out, leaving them unable to defend themselves against another ship blowing them out of the sky.

It’s been a few days. Keira’s access to Skyler is restricted. And he’s not recovering. Maybe there’s something to the whole thing about dying of a broken heart, but Keira suspects he’s being poisoned instead. During visiting hours, she asks a hapless nurse to take him for a walk, like an invalid, and she’s allowed to. Once hidden in a back stairwell, she jams an adrenaline shot into his chest, sets the stairwell on fire with a can of hairspray and a lighter, and they escape as the fire alarms go off. She brings him back to her apartment and nurses him back to health as best she can, just weaning him off the poison.

In both stories, at least he’s still alive and he believes her now.

Back to Cyberpunk RED, after a few days Keira helps Skyler find a place to stay, close to her, and they start trying to pull it together and make a plan of action. All Skyler can think to do is Solo work, and despite his protests, Keira refuses to let him go it alone. That’s how they begin their lives alone together in Night City, just trying to stay alive and find out what their loved ones died for.

#keira #my ocs

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glitterblazercalum · 4 years

Text

got a river for a soul, and baby, you’re a boat

or: Oh, fuck. We showed up wearing matching couples’ costumes to this party by accident and now everyone thinks we’re together.” + cashton

hello and happy halloween everyone!! giant thank u to ainslee @ashesonthefloor for putting this event together!! and for forcing me to actually get this fic done, looking it over, and generally being a major source of serotonin in my life. another huge thank u to bella @clumsyclifford for being one of my favorite people and loving frat boys enough that it made me want to write a fic about them to annoy her <3 love you both <3

here is the link to the event masterpost bc I highly recommend checking out all of the other amazing fics:

https://ashesonthefloor.tumblr.com/post/633534107120549888/hello-welcome-to-my-halloween-fic-event

warnings: mentions of alcohol

word count: 2,872

without further ado, please enjoy the fic I wrote mostly all last night while looping drag me down for thirteen hours straight :))

Calum doesn’t know what fuckhead came up with the idea of having a joint Halloween party for Sigma Nu and Sigma Pi this year, but he really wants to fight them. He thinks he’d probably have a lot of people on his side, considering how much Sig Nu and and Sig Pi hate each other, so he tucks the idea of interfraternity war away in his head as a contingency plan in case the party goes to shit, as joint parties with any other frat always seem to. And it’s not like it’s a one night thing, because all three days of the “Halloweekend,” as Michael refuses to stop calling it, are supposedly going to be spent with Sig Nu, one party at their own house, and two at the shithole that he assumes is the Sig Nu house, in some deranged attempt at bonding. He’ll be lucky to make it out alive, probably.

Before college, he really never did anything of his own for Halloween, mainly used to being used as a prop or side character for his sister Mali-Koa’s elaborate costumes, or, after she’d moved out, sticking a pair of fake fangs in his mouth to hand out candy to the few kids who rang the doorbell despite his efforts to keep all the lights in the house off. Last year, as a freshman, he’d gotten roped into a group costume with some of the other Sig Pi pledges, and while his memories are...hazy at best, he vaguely remembers falling asleep in a Teletubbies onesie at the end of the night.

This year, though, no one has tried to tell him what to dress up as, so it’s now a few hours before the first of the three parties, and Calum still has no ideas for what he should dress up as. A quick Google search for “cheap easy costumes” hadn’t really been all that helpful, so he decides to ignore the problem and take a nap until he actually has to leave.

A few hours later, Michael barges into the room to drag him out of bed, and looks around for a few seconds before asking, “You don’t have a costume, do you?”

Calum groans, pulling himself out of bed and wracking his brain for an idea that he can plausibly bullshit in the next few seconds, because he can’t let Michael be right and have something to tease him about, so he blurts, “I’m going to be a salt shaker.”

Michael gapes at him a bit for a few seconds before asking, “What the fuck? What kind of costume is that? What are you even going to wear for that?”

Calum mentally kicks himself in the shin, as hard as possible, because he really hasn’t thought this through. Why couldn’t he have just said cat or cowboy or something even slightly in the realm of normal Halloween costumes?

“Uhhh.. y’know that baseball tee I have? The one with the black sleeves and white middle?”

“I’m pretty sure that’s in my closet, but continue.”

“What the fuck, dude? Give it back!”

“You haven’t noticed that it’s missing for like three weeks, I just assumed it was mine now. Tell me what the rest of the costume is,” Michael demands.

“I’ll just tape a piece of paper with a big ‘S’ on it to the front of my shirt, and then put one of those pots with the holes on my head. Bam! Salt shaker!” Calum says, moderately impressed with his ability to pull stuff out of his ass this quickly.

“What makes you think we even have a colander?” Michael asks, crossing his arms.

Calum gives him a blank stare. “A what?”

“That’s what the pots with the holes are called, you idiot.”

“You think Harry would live anywhere that didn’t have a fully-stocked kitchen? There’s bound to be one in one of the cabinets or something.”

“Fine. I’ll go get the shirt while you look for the colander.” Before Calum can object, suggest that he look through Michael’s closet himself and steal back any of his other clothes that have somehow wound up there, Michael’s already halfway down the hallway.

Sighing, he trudges down the stairs towards the kitchen, where one of the seniors, Niall, is sitting with his head in his hands, dressed as a pirate.

“Hey, dude, nice costume,” Calum offers as a greeting. “You wouldn’t happen to know where I can find a colander, would you? I know Harry—”

“Do not talk to me about Harry right now,” Niall says, and Calum stops his search for a moment to send him a concerned look.

“What happ—”

“That needy-ass motherfucker thinks that just because I didn’t want to do a couples’ costume with him, it means I don’t love him anymore! Never mind the fact that he literally mentioned this idea to me yesterday, well past the point where everyone finalizes their costumes.”

Calum offers him a sympathetic look and offers, “Couples’ costumes are boring and cheesy anyways. Neither of you are missing out on anything, at least in my opinion.”

Niall lifts his head up from where he’d been repeatedly hitting it on the table to smirk at Calum and ask, “Have a lot of experience with couples’ costumes, do you?”

Luckily, Calum has finally found the colander, so he opts to ignore the question and just leave the kitchen entirely.

When he gets back upstairs, Michael’s in his room, unabashedly checking himself out in the mirror that’s on the back of the closet door. “Yeah, yeah, your anime character of the year looks great, now get out and let me get ready.”

Michael scoffs, “Get ready, as if you’re even doing anything,” but moves towards the door anyway.

Michael’s right, the costume is ridiculously easy to throw together, and two minutes later, they’re both out the door, walking across Fraternity Row to get to the Sig Nu house, where the music is already blaring and strobe lights throw red, then green, then blue shadows across everyone’s faces. On his way to the kitchen to grab a drink, he sees Niall and Harry walk into the house, holding hands and laughing together, so he assumes that their fight has blown over as quickly as all of their other fights always seem to.

He sees a few different trays of shots and decides he might as well take one to get the night started off right. After, he realizes that he probably shouldn’t grab a beer now, Mali’s rule about sticking to one color of booze for the night ringing in his head, so he settles for filling up a Solo cup with whatever glow in the dark gin concoction is in all the punch bowls. He wouldn’t put it past the Sig Nus to poison the drink on purpose, but it tastes relatively normal, so he grabs another cup for Michael and attempts to leave the kitchen, steering around the couple sloppily making out in the doorway.

It’s harder to spot Michael than it usually is, considering that at least half the people at the party are wearing some type of wig, but Calum eventually makes his way back over to him. He’s talking to Niall and Harry, and they both offer him a smile before continuing on with the conversation. Once that reaches a lull, Niall leans closer to Calum and says, “Mate, you didn’t need to lie to me about couples’ costumes.”

Calum has no idea what Niall is talking about, so he shakes his head and asks, “What are you talking about?”

Niall cackles, and Harry turns to look at him adoringly before going back to talking to Michael, and Calum is more confused than ever. Niall grabs his shoulder and spins him around and points in the direction of a clump of people. “You’re salt and he’s pepper, right? That’s such an obvious couples’ costume, although you two do seem to have a bit of a disconnect on how much effort you put in. That guy really went all out. And dude, why haven’t you told us that you have a boyfriend? You know we’d want to know about that, give him the Sig Pi seal of approval and all that. Wait. Unless he’s a Sig Nu, in which case, I don’t want to know because I’d probably have to kick you out. That’s a joke, by the way.”

Calum barely has the presence of mind to mumble, “He’s not my boyfriend,” before crossing the room to get to the guy in the hyper-realistic pepper grinder costume.

The guy smiles as Calum approaches, and despite the costume covering most of his body, Calum can tell that he’s cute. “Why so salty?” Pepper Guy greets, the sunshiney smile still on his face.

Calum smirks and replies, “Maybe I just need some more spice in my life.” Pepper Guy laughs, and just like everything else about him, it’s cute, and Calum wants to hear it again. “I’m Calum, by the way.”

“Ashton. Nice to meet you, man.”

Calum leans a little closer so that it’s easier to hold a conversation over the loud music and asks, “What’s the deal with the super realistic pepper grinder costume?”

Ashton makes a strange noise, somewhere between a laugh and a groan, and says, “I got it off some random sketchy website, but it was supposed to be a chess piece. Something clearly went wrong somewhere in production, and my friend Luke said that I might as well sharpie a “P” onto it and just go with it.”

Calum makes a noise of agreement, mind stuck on a dumb idea. Before he can reconsider, he sends Michael a quick text that says if u’ve already taken over as dj, can u play that come grind w me song? and a few seconds later, he hears the opening notes and grins.

“Hey, Ashton?”

“Yeah?” Ashton replies, as realization slips across his face.

Right in time with the singer’s voice, Calum says, “Come grind with me,” and he laughingly pulls Ashton towards the makeshift dance floor. Neither of them can really dance, so it’s a mess of laughter and limbs flopping around, but Calum feels an unmistakable electricity between them too, and once the song is over, they stay for the next few, enraptured by each other. When they finally exhaust themselves with all the laughing and mock-twerking, Ashton asks Calum if he wants a refill, and when Calum nods, he grabs his hand and starts pulling him towards the kitchen.

Once they’re there, Calum goes for another serving of the glow in the dark punch, which is steadily dimming as the glow sticks run out of light. Since that’s really the only light source in the kitchen, Calum doesn’t see Ashton until he’s turning around and Ashton is right in front of him, reaching around him for a cup. Calum’s kind of trapped with his back against the counter, Ashton’s pepper grinder costume tall enough to really block out the view of the rest of the party, and the world narrows, all of it contained in where their eyes connect, and then, after Calum has safely set his drink back on the counter, that narrow point expands just a bit to where their mouths land on each other’s. The colander gets knocked off Calum’s head as he lifts himself up to sit on the counter, wrapping his legs around Ashton’s waist to pull him closer, as close as he can possibly get him.

Ashton’s sucking a mark into Calum’s neck when Calum has his first coherent thought of the past few minutes and pulls back, breathlessly asking “Wait, wait, you’re not a Sig Nu, are you?” fully expecting the answer to be no.

Ashton steps back a little too, and it takes him a second to register the question before he groans, “Of course you’re a fucking Sig Pi, that’s the only explanation that makes sense for me never seeing you anywhere before. You’re too hot for me to not notice otherwise.”

Calum flushes and mentally curses out whatever idiots had started the rivalry between Sig Nu and Sig Pi before he grabs his stupid colander off the ground and gives Ashton an awkward wave goodbye.

Once he’s out of the kitchen, he quickly glances around in search of Michael, and when he can’t immediately find him, he just gives up and leaves entirely. Fuck Sig Nu.

He spends most of the next day bitching about his hangover, and then, a few hours later, bitching about his hangover while helping to set up the house for that night’s party.

He doesn’t really have much more of a costume for tonight, throwing on a gray shirt and sharpie-ing some whiskers on his face. Michael takes pity on him and makes him a headband with an approximation of what they both think mouse ears are, and Calum is mildly entertained by going up to everyone and saying, “I’m a mouse, duh.”

His heart’s really not in the right place to party tonight, which is probably breaking the cardinal rule of being in a frat, so he sticks close to Michael, who has taken over the role of DJ, once again. Zayn from Alpha Sig strolls over after about half an hour, devil horns askew, and quietly says to Calum, “Cat and mouse, huh? Didn’t think you had it in you, Hood, that’s proper cute. Not as cute as me and Lou, mind you, but still, I respect the effort.”

Calum is reluctant to look up and see who he’s accidentally matching with today, because, with his luck, it’s probably another guy from Sig Nu. When he does eventually look up, he immediately makes eye contact with Ashton, who happens to be walking by, dressed in all black and with whiskers sharpie’d onto his face too. Calum wants to bang his head into a wall because the universe clearly hates him if it’s having him match with Ashton again. Even beyond that, Ashton looks so good out of the stupid pepper grinder and in all black that Calum wants to make out with him again.

Ashton is clearly having similar thoughts when he gestures Calum over and leads them towards a little pocket of quiet space in one of the lesser used hallways.

Calum really wants to hook his thumb into one of Ashton’s belt loops, so he does, as Ashton looks him up and down a few times. “Is the mouse costume your way of telling me you want me to chase you?”

Calum murmurs, “Shut up,” before leaning in to kiss him, frat rivalry be damned. It’s just as good as it was the night before, maybe even more so, now that the pepper costume isn’t in their way. At this point, there’s no denying the chemistry. It can’t be blamed on being drunk since Calum’s been nursing the same beer all night, and the part of his brain that’s protesting against being this close to a Sig Nu is getting smaller and smaller as he and Ashton continue to kiss.

They stay in that hallway for the rest of the night, eventually sliding down to sit on the ground, legs pressed together, sharing stupid stories about their respective frats. Calum’s surprised when the music shuts off because it feels like it’s only been an hour at most, that’s how easy it is to talk to Ashton. Ashton heaves himself up and reaches both hands down to help Calum up, too.

“I don’t think there’s any way you can match your costume to mine tomorrow, but I’ll come find you anyways,” Ashton says, as he leaves Calum with a kiss on the cheek.

Calum’s too wired to sleep much, so he opts to help clean up the house instead, and that takes up enough of his day that when nighttime rolls around, he’s stood staring at his closet without a costume idea for the third time in as many days. After ten minutes of consideration, he digs through one of his drawers to pull out the fake vampire fangs that he had somehow remembered to bring with him, and he goes down the hall to ask Jack to put some fake blood on his mouth and neck. Jack always goes all out for Halloween.

Once he’s at the party, he doesn’t have to wait long to find Ashton, who looks incredibly good in his werewolf costume. There’s fake blood on him too, which is really the only way their costumes could be understood to be matching, or so Calum thinks. Tonight, Jack and Alex are the ones to tease him, “You know what, I agree. Jacob and Edward should have ended up together, Bella was boring as shit.”

Calum’s really not bothered by the comments at all, so much so that he’s already thinking of couples’ costumes ideas for next year when he finds his way over to Ashton and whispers, “Let’s get out of here.”

“Are you trying to make a move on me? I’m a respectable Sigma Nu, I don’t know if I can allow that.”

Calum laughs and tugs him out the door, “Told you I wanted some more spice in my life.”

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