#neurotypicals communicate clearly challenge

[ohara-n-brown]

Am I the only one that feels like NTs HATE saying 'I don't know.'

You will not believe the amount of times I'll ask a basic objective question about a situation and they'll give me an answer, only for later the answer to be completely wrong. And then when I ask them why they would give me wrong information - they say 'I just guessed.'

I didn't ask you for your guess. I asked for the information. If you didn't have the information don't just GUESS. Say 'I don't know.'

I feel like NT don't realize that WRONG information is worse than no information.

If I want to know when an event will end and you say '5pm' - I'm going to be mentally prepared for 5pm. And if it DOESN'T end then, not only will I be out of energy, but I'll be irritated and confused because I'm in an unfamiliar situation with NO INFORMATION

Had you just told me 'I don't know what time it ends' instead of GUESSING 5, then I would've prepared for the worse. But now I have to literally rearrange everything in my head and talk myself down from meltdown cause I was given inaccurate information and also I thought I was going home.

But they act instead like saying I don't know is a moral failure.

My father used to yell at me all the time to not say 'I don't know.'

He'd always demand I figure it out and come up with SOMETHING no matter how uninformed or vague and that's how you have NTs walking around feeling like it's a crime to admit they simply don't know something

and instead they'll just shamble something together and hope that's good enough regardless of whether in the information is actually helpful or correct.

IT'S SO ANNOYING. JUST SAY YOU DON'T KNOW.

Stop guessing and giving me WRONG information because it only makes the situation worse and more confusing. Say you don't KNOW. It's FINE.

[hyperfixatedbean]

Why I think Eddie Diaz is autistic !

(As an autistic individual)

- Struggle with emotional expression:

He often struggles to express emotions, particularly in his relationship with women, (look at the way he acted with Sharon, Ana and Marisol, never communicating clearly, or doing it VERY straightforwardly (-> “you should go”)

He struggle with articulating his feelings, to name his emotions and process them (seemingly alexithymia) and he close off a lot, even with his therapist !

- Literal Thinking:

He tend to interpret language literally, (interactions with his colleagues and fast problem-solving, keeping a cool head under very stressful situations, the way he react to jokes, the way he doesn’t believe and ‘judge’ the way they fear superstitions, only believing what he can prove)

It seems to me like he experiences challenges with understanding figurative language or sarcasm and only believe what is proven, he’s very closed off about the idea of superstition which can be seen in some autistic people who struggle with theses concept

And he can be really straightforward (see the “you should go home Ana” or the “last time he wore that was at his mom’s funeral”) -> stating facts straightforwardly without processing it first and without realizing how stating it like that can be ‘awkward’ to others

- Meltdowns and Coping Mechanisms:

He experiences moments of intense frustration and resorts to unhealthy coping mechanisms (-> fights and destroying his room, hurting himself and other in the process (as in a lot of autistic meltdown and the way a lot of us turn to violent coping mechanisms to fight against sensory overload and the complexity of understanding our own emotions -> resorting to violence)

He parallels experiences of sensory overload and regulation, also his panic attacks and the way he avoid addressing his trauma and feelings by brushing it off and ignoring his own mental health, struggling to understand his own feelings about what he’s experiencing

- Difficulty with Trauma and Normalcy:

His reluctance to address trauma and persistent efforts to appear "normal."

It reflects challenges faced by autistic ppl in processing traumatic experiences and blending in with neurotypical society (force conformism and such)

There’s something about the way he and his father approach emotions, keeping it hidden and close off, that resonates a lot with my own experiences as someone autistic raised by someone who’s (probably) autistic too ‼️

+ the way he quickly connect with Buck exemplifies the ‘neurodivergent link’ : ADHD and autism solidarity is a reality ! Neurodivergent people tend to feel more secure, comfortable and friendly with other neurodivergent individuals!!

He basically just give such a autistic energy, like- I really connect with his struggle and the way he interact with the world around him, but please tell me what YOU think 🫶‼️

To have a better view of this part of him we would need more of his pov, sadly we rarely get it so I’m basing this of what I remember, what I personally see in him, what I connected with :’D

(Keep in mind that I probably projecting and it’s just an headcanon, not hate please <3 constructive criticism is welcome tho !!)

Credits it to @thisonemaniac that helped me make this post :D !! We talked about it a bit, I highlighted in orange what he remind me off ‼️

(Since you asked me about it you might want to read this :D !! I explained it better I think xD @lesbianphoebespengler )

[percheduphere]

LET'S TALK ABOUT NEURODIVERSE AND DIFFERENTLY-ABLED/PEOPLE WITH DISABILITIES REPRESENTATION IN THE LOKI SERIES

Thank you so much for your patience and your amazing ask, @indulligence! Special thank you, as well, to all the gif artists who made this meta possible.

I've been champing at the bit to get to this one, and I finally made it!

As a disclaimer, I am not a doctor, and I recognize we should take care in pseudo-diagnosing fictional characters as we don't want to perpetuate stereotypes of our neurodiverse and differently abled/people with disabilities communities. Having said that, if interpreting a character as being neurodiverse and/or differently abled/having a disability brings you comfort and joy, you should certainly do so! Canon is a sandbox. Fictional worlds and characters are meant to be engaged with for your pleasure.

I do cite a few medical graphic and their sources below. If any of those sources are problematic in any way, please let me know and I can switch out the graphic for one from a better source.

LOKI - ADHD [?]

At first glance, Loki's characterization in Thor 1, Thor 2, and Ragnarok don't seem to present him as having challenges with executive function. He appears to be able to focus and sustain focus, able to organize, and able to sustain effort and process. Loki also has exceptional memory.

[source]

As for mood, many mood symptoms of ADHD overlap with depression, the latter of which Loki clearly has. Nevertheless, it should be noted that ADHD and depression are often comorbid. He could have both.

[source]

While memory and effort are not concerns, Loki has consistently shown challenges with impulse control, managing frustration, and modulating emotion. A number of his most consequential choices (i.e. inadvertently directing Malekith to his mother, chasing after Sylvie, etc.) are influenced by his emotional state rather than premeditation. This may suggest that if Loki has ADHD, he leans toward Type 2: Impulsive/Hyperactive:

[source]

His characterization in the Loki series changes somewhat to include more hyperactivity and swings between hyperfocus and difficulty regulating attention and focus. Loki gesticulates, fidgets, and moves a lot more in the series than the movies. He also talks much more quickly when excited.

Do I think these changes were intentional? I honestly have no idea. Whatever the case, I think it's lovely that the Loki who becomes the most powerful hero in the MCU is also the version that demonstrates a higher likelihood of being diagnosed with ADHD.

MOBIUS - NEUROTYPICAL / HIGHLY SENSITIVE PERSON (HSP) [?]

I think Mobius, for the most part, is neurotypical. Even with Loki being his special interest/hyperfixation, he doesn't exhibit the other symptom criteria to meet a Level 1 Autism diagnosis, an Obsessive Compulsive Disorder diagnosis, or an Obsessive Compulsive Personality Disorder diagnosis.

He may, however, be a Highly Sensitive Person (HSP).

[source]

Mobius's empathy for others, perception of behavior, observation of circumstances, and deep appreciation for beauty (particularly when it comes to the beauty of people) are exceptionally strong.

NOTE: Even when the stakes are dire, he's still willing to give Ravonna and Miss Minutes the benefit of the doubt. He really is a sweetie pie. A sweetie pie who can and will slap you if you deserve it.

I think Mobius may mask his strong emotional responses regularly in order to be able function in the TVA. There were only two incidents, when he was unable to suppress his feelings, and those outbursts were remarkable:

That said, Mobius doesn't quite meet the other symptoms of HSP, which include sensitivity to stimuli, being easily startled, and aversion to violence. As we see in the series, Loki's antics don't overwhelm or startle him, and he has no issue with torture when he deems it necessary.

It is possible that Mobius may have Acquired Neurodivergence post-series as a consequence of trauma in the series finale. At present, we have nothing in canon to support this, but many fanfics show Mobius struggling to cope with the loss of Loki, his home, his family, and his identity. This severe level of loss can cause a variety of mental health conditions and disorders that may impact Mobius's future ability to function in a neurotypical way.

SYLVIE - ACQUIRED NEURODIVERGENCE [?]

I've written about Sylvie's sexuality here, and I think some (if not most) of her quirks when it comes social interaction, emotional intimacy, and physical contact may be explained by trauma. As such, I think some of her behavioral symptoms, which can be mistaken as autism, is actually the result of PTSD causing structural changes to her brain. Loki likely has this as well.

Like O.B., she is verbally blunt and appears to demonstrate lower empathy, especially with those she disagrees with.

To be clear, this doesn't mean Sylvie doesn't have empathy. She does, as can be seen in the gif above. What I mean is, her empathy and ability to demonstrate it are generally low throughout the series. This is likely a psychological defense mechanism. Having lowered empathy is advantageous if growing up in apocalypses is the only means of survival. Every friend and lover she's ever had is either dead or will die because of those apocalypses or because of who she is to the TVA.

Unlike O.B., Sylvie initiates social interactions and develops friendships more easily. Sylvie has acquaintances, if not friends, in John (McDonalds,) Eric (bartender), and Lyle (record shop). NOTE: You can tell the writer is a man when the bias in creating side characters skews male instead of female. Sylvie should at least have ONE girlfriend in her 1982 timeline, but she doesn't.

OUROBOROS (O.B.) - LEVEL 1 AUTISM [?]

Here he is! Here is our favorite neurodiverse ray of sunshine! Our autistic cinnamon roll! The MVP of season 2!

Now, I have mixed feelings regarding how people on the autism spectrum are portrayed in media. While they are often shown as socially awkward, they are also shown to be exceptionally brilliant in their area(s) of interest. This is quite flattering and often true in real life, yet I worry that this creates a stereotype that not only are all autistic people "geniuses", they are also geniuses in a way that is useful to a capitalistic society. That expectation isn't healthy and perpetuates the belief that a person is only valuable if they are useful. Further, it is a narrow portrayal of the autism spectrum. It is important to have representation across that spectrum instead of stopping at Level 1.

But I don't like being a Debbie Downer, so let's focus on the good representation that can be found in O.B.!

O.B., in a lot of ways, reminds me of Entrapta from She-Ra and the Princesses of Power. He doesn't always read social cues correctly, which often plays out as fantastic comedy relief on screen when the stakes are outrageous.

Like Entrapta, his science and engineering aptitude are nearly unmatched if not for Victor Timely. However, the hyperfocus O.B. exhibits does have negative consequences, as exemplified when he explains he lost his job and wife due to dedication in creating a TemPad prototype. Despite these losses, O.B. is resilient and looks forward to what comes next (another possible symptom of his neurodiversity).

I love that O.B.'s neurodiversity allows him to believe Loki when Loki finds him on his branched timeline with his "crazy story". It is also what allows him to see the patterns in Loki's timeslipping and propose, with confidence, that timeslipping can be controlled.

He is also a very good friend. Though he might not be the "huggy" type, he always makes an effort to find concrete solutions to big problems. I would say that O.B. is Loki's second closest friend in the series after Mobius.

I can't tell if it's O.B.'s autism or O.B.'s inner asshole that's fucking around with Loki in this scene. Not once but twice! Either way, I love it (and the fact that Loki resists the temptation to zap him back).

CASEY - LEVEL 1 AUTISIM [?]

What I appreciate about Casey is that if he is interpreted as autistic, he is not a super genius. He is still quite gifted, but I think he represents where a good number of level 1 autistics actually land in life. I feel this is a much healthier portrayal and balances out O.B.'s genius representation nicely.

NOTE: Look how cute they are! They must be protected at all costs.

I am also so happy that Casey and O.B. found friendship in each other. We have to give B-15 (Verity) credit for this. The only reason they met at all is because B-15 had the presence of mind to think of Casey to help O.B. with the Loom debacle.

Together, they become unstoppable, but there's one more friend who completes the Science Club Trio ...

VICTOR TIMELY - SPEECH IMPEDIMENT/LEVEL 1 AUTISM [?]

Since I've discussed autism interpretation and representation at length with O.B. and Casey, I'm going to concentrate on the portrayal of Victor Timely's speech impediment.

I also have mixed feelings regarding the media portrayal of people with speech impediments. This medical condition is often used as a means of showing a character is "meek" or "harmless". I don't doubt that this character feature was chosen for that exact purpose, to immediately contrast Timely against HWR in the quickest, most efficient way possible. Unfortunately, this kind of narrative "shortcut" leads to stereotyping people with speech impediments accordingly.

It's a good thing, then, that Loki series takes the time to add some depth to Timely's character. Yes, he has a speech impediment, but he is also very willful, crafty, and brave.

[lutawolf]

Hi Luta!

Went through your reviews for LITA again bc, the show might’ve just ended but I’m already missing it, lol. But more importantly I saw that little tidbit you said on a correlation btw ADHD when u we’re explaining how subs work… and I gotta know more 👀…I honestly have like so many questions, but I wanna wait till I hear what you say first so, please tell??

🐈‍⬛ (Also, love the emoji choice, though I feel very seen… also how??)

Hey Hey 🐈!!!

There’s been an ongoing conversation about the overlap between BDSM and neurodivergent. There are a lot of studies that are still up in the air, but it's not a surprise to those in the lifestyle. For many of us, it's a healthy outlet for those of us who think differently.

To better grasp the concept of what I'm trying to explain. What is a neurodivergent? A neurotypical person has a brain that social majority says works in the ways that society expects them to. They go about their day with no real challenges, no overload, and no mental breaks because society was set up specifically with them in mind. A neurodivergent person, however, has a brain that works differently and, as the neurotypical folks make up a majority of the world, may struggle with certain aspects of life based on their ability to adapt to expectations.

Neurodiversity is at the core of the BDSM culture, and kink communities draw in many neurodivergent people for varying reasons. One of them being social skills. Social skills are essential to the BDSM community because without it, there is no trust. You'd think this would be a struggle for the neurodivergent but you'd be wrong. The rules for engagement are clearly and explicitly laid out in  BDSM guidelines, which means that folk with supposed social deficits have clear guidelines as to how to interact.

Most neurodivergents don't like to be touched or do like to touch but don't know when to. The BDSM culture has rules for this, too. The respect for bodily autonomy is built into the guidelines. Therefore, everyone knows when to proceed, when not to, and how to even ask. You’re not supposed to touch anybody without their enthusiastic and explicit consent. When you do engage with someone, it is first talked about with an exploration of what is and isn’t okay to do and how it is going to be done.

Alongside all that is the fact that there are many pathways. For those that need black and white, it's there. For those of us who need stimulation of more than one brain wave, you'll find that there are allowances for this as well. Not to mention all the sensory play and stimulation.

In essence, we've carved out our own safe space in a world that doesn't fit us. 💜💜💜

[simpforsix]

watching community for the first time and every time abed is on screen i am filled with so much joy. 

as an autistic person i so rarely see myself represented on screen. i knew about the background of abed’s character before, how he was written by dan harmon who found out he was autistic because of writing his character. but i didn’t expect to feel so seen. 

usually i have to seek out autistic rep, like when i watched heartbreak high after seeing clips and analysis of their autistic character quinni (who was also amazing rep and made me feel seen). i have to seek it out so i know what to avoid, like the good doctor or pretty much any autistic character popular amongst allistics who think autism speaks is a good organization. so many characters i’ve seen lauded as good autistic rep have been hurtful, stereotypical, or just don’t represent my experiences, even if they are good representation. in a sitcom, especially from the era of community, i don’t expect to see good representation. i expect to see characters like sheldon cooper, who are autistic-coded in a way meant to mock autistic people and reinforce stereotypes, and who feel foreign to me.

but abed? holy shit, i was not expecting to almost cry about him when i first saw him. he is so clearly and unapologetically autistic in a way i wish i could be. he’s blunt, he doesn’t always get jokes, he’s awkward, and he’s so much like me. the way he observes others and picks up their mannerisms in ways allistics can’t comprehend is so relatable. the way he runs through different scenarios to learn how to act and react is exactly what i do before pretty much any social interaction. and the way he relates everything back to his special interests? i’ve never seen that side of autism represented on screen. i do that so much, and for so long i thought i was just rude or weird, when in fact i was just autistic and that’s how i relate to and understand the world. abed sees the world through his autism. it impacts every aspect of his character.

(also his special interest in inspector spacetime is literally me with my special interest in doctor who)

he’s also not the typical savant we see in media! i’m so tired of those depictions, since they make me feel like a failure. i failed most of my classes because of i’m autistic. i can’t handle all the homework or exams, and i can’t analyse things in a neurotypical way which often means allistics give me lower marks. but even though i’m not academically gifted, i’m still smart, and some of that is because i’m autistic. i’m really good at logical analysis, at music, and i know so much about my special interests. and it’s the same thing with abed! he’s not some academic genius who was a child prodigy and aces every class. but, like me and the other autistic people i know, he’s smart in other ways. he’s good at analysing people, at filmmaking, and is also super knowledgeable about his special interests. his value goes beyond his intelligence, unlike so many savant caricatures who are only used as human supercomputers. 

i also love the way he interacts with the other characters. they’re all weird in their own way, and abed doesn’t stick out. sure, he’s awkward and sometimes says the wrong thing, but he’s not devalued for that. i don’t like how he’s sometimes mocked for autistic traits, but luckily it’s few and far between and not triggering like other media has been for me. the other characters also stand up for him, like jeff getting into a fight during the christmas ep in season one, instead of laughing along. he’s also not treated like some poor child in need of saving by the allistics. autistic people are so frequently infantilized, and most media only encourages that. they also directly challenge that notion in the show, with the other characters worrying about abed’s sex life only for it to be revealed that abed fucks. 

his friendship (or romance) with troy is especially great. as an autistic person, i’m so tired of being expected to change so that people like me. because people do like me, autistic traits and all. a real friend, like troy, will listen to your infodumps. they’ll engage with your interests, and they’ll support you even when you have less socially acceptable traits, like a fear of change. they get to be super nerdy and weird and they don’t judge each other, because they’re being nerdy and weird together. like abed, i found it really hard to make friends, and i still only have a small group of friends, but i prefer it that way. the group wouldn’t be the same in his absence, because he brings value as a character. 

i appreciate abed’s awkwardness, the way he doesn’t dampen his autistic traits for the comfort of others. he doesn’t have some “character growth” arc where he learns to be more allistic. his autism isn’t a character flaw, it’s just another aspect of who he is. 

i also think it’s important to note that abed being arabic and muslim breaks stereotypes about autistic people. it is only recently that our wider society has begun discussing the lack of diversity in autism representation and it’s impacts. most autistic characters are cishet white men. this is based in the notion that the majority of autistic people are cishet white men, which comes from the history of only testing on cishet white boys and creating the diagnostic tools based on them. autism can present differently outside of that group, and it also creates bias in diagnosis. even though abed is still a cis man, being a poc breaks down the stereotype of white men being the only ones with autism. he also offers representation to a wider group of people, even now. while i’ve seen a bit more rep for autistic white women, the rep for autistic poc (especially woc) remains fairly nonexistent. 

on the topic of canon, i personally think abed is canonically autistic. it’s referenced a couple of times in the show, though it isn’t directly confirmed or denied. but considering dan harmon’s story, i think it’s clear that the autistic-coding is intentional. a character doesn’t have to outright say the words “i am autistic” for it to be canon. he has so many autistic traits that it is undeniable, and with dan harmon writing him i think it’s safe to say that he’s canonically autistic. keep in mind that this is my personal opinion and that other autistic people may have other opinions, all of which are valid. the debate of canon is complicated and everyone has different definitions. 

i wish there were more characters like abed. characters who are impacted by being autistic yet exist beyond that. characters who speak to an autistic audience, who are written by autistic people. autistic characters who are diverse, who are likeable, who are smart, who are capable.

seeing abed made me so emotional. i want more autistic characters who make me feel seen. i want more autistic characters who make me feel human.

[lovehealgrow]

How to Support Your Partner After an Autism Diagnosis

The autism spectrum is a frequently-misunderstood neurodevelopmental condition. The stigma surrounding autism and autistic individuals stems from misconceptions and a lack of awareness. While autism is often diagnosed in childhood since it does affect development, adult autism diagnoses are not uncommon.

This diagnosis can be confusing and upsetting, but it doesn’t mean that there’s anything wrong with your partner or their ability to love. People with autism can be loving partners and friends, just like neurotypical people, and if you’re in a relationship with someone who has autism, there are many things you can do to support them.

What Is Autism?

Autism is a neurodevelopmental disorder that affects how individuals perceive and interact with the world. It is characterized by difficulties in social communication and interaction, as well as restricted and repetitive patterns of behavior, interests, or activities.

Because autism is a lifelong condition, your partner will have been living with it and dealing with it their entire lives. A diagnosis changes nothing about who they are, their emotions, or their capabilities. The diagnosis simply explains some things about how their brain works.

As an adult, an autism diagnosis may be a relief, explaining challenges and certain behavioral patterns that your partner has been dealing with their entire life. Your partner will likely have learned dozens of compensatory or masking behaviors and will likely have had a sense for years that something is “off” about them. An autism diagnosis can help them understand themselves and feel more comfortable advocating for their sensory and emotional needs.

How To Be A Supportive Partner For Your Partner With Autism

Supporting your partner with autism requires clear communication, empathy, and understanding. There are a lot of myths about autism and how it affects relationships. In many ways, supporting a partner with autism is just like supporting any partner. You need to communicate well, and you need to be emotionally available for each other.

Another key element of supporting a partner with autism is creating a supportive and accepting environment at home. Encourage a routine that provides predictability and stability. Offer understanding when your partner may require time alone or engage in repetitive behaviors (often called “stimming”) that help them cope with stress.

Listen To and Believe Your Partner

An adult autism diagnosis can require a considerable amount of time for your partner to process. Your partner may want to talk about things out loud to reach a point of closure for them and understanding for you. Simply listening to your partner as they process their diagnosis can be a vital source of support.

It’s also important to believe your partner. When they talk about how they experience the world or how they’re feeling, believe them. Don’t second-guess their emotions or experiences, and don’t catastrophize or ignore their diagnosis. If you have difficulty accepting their diagnosis, speak to a therapist to help process your feelings.

Build Communication Skills

While autism is a spectrum and every autistic person’s suite of traits is unique, one common thread is a desire for clear communication. Clear communication is helpful for any relationship, but one very common autistic trait is challenges with vague communication. No partner, whether neurotypical or autistic, can read your mind – so don’t expect them to. Communicate clearly about how you’re feeling, and be understanding if your partner wants more information or clarification.

Educate Yourself

It’s likely that your partner has long been researching autism. There is a huge autism community online, and very rarely do adult autism diagnoses come out of the blue. It’s likely that your partner sought a diagnosis after speaking with other autistic people and researching the condition.

Ask your partner what resources they’ve found and like, and read them yourself. Look for resources created by people with autism– groups like the Autistic Self-Advocacy Network, or ASAN, are great places to start.

Support Their Unmasking

This is one of the most important ways you can support your partner with autism. “Masking” is the term for how autistic people learn to hide their autistic traits to appear “normal” or blend in. This is frequently emotionally exhausting.

By creating a safe space for your partner with autism to drop the facade and be themselves, you are showing them how much you can be trusted and how much you truly love them. You don’t have to do anything special– if your partner starts rocking or stimming in front of you, it’s a sign that they feel safe and supported within the relationship.

Seek Professional Support

An autism diagnosis provides your partner and you with a lot of new information. Therapy or counseling can help you through any challenges or emotional difficulties related to their autism diagnosis. A mental health professional can provide strategies for managing anxiety, improving communication skills, and enhancing overall well-being.

If you are working through the challenges and changes of an autism diagnosis with your partner, please do not hesitate to reach out to us today at Love Heal Grow.

[jaegerbroshoe]

1) First off, can I just say how much I freaking LOVE the communication between Youngwoo and Junho??? Youngwoo not being afraid to take the first step once she sorts out her thoughts or asking for guidance regarding things she doesn’t know (like during the kissing scene) is incredibly refreshing. And the way Junho goes along with it even if it’s awkward or embarrassing… Their maturity is what makes their relationship so healthy compared to pretty much every other pairing I can recall seeing in media. I need to see more of this type of representation.

2) Youngwoo researching date ideas and the hand-holding scene were so cute!!! I like how they’re showing the unconventional side to their relationship, as it’s challenging society’s idea of what a relationship “should” be like. Also, I really love how respectful Junho is. He doesn’t pressure Youngwoo into anything. Once he offers up an idea and she indicates no, he backs off, like with the hand-holding and the kiss.

Remember everyone, consent is sexy.

3) I’m sad about Suyeon and the owner of the restaurant not working out. I don’t know if that’s his real personality cause he never came off that way, but it felt more like he was just nervous?? Oh well, I guess.

I was so worried the guy at the club would turn out to be Minwoo, but thankfully he wasn’t. Nevertheless, I’m still worried they’re gonna push for them to get together since she’s still single.

4) This case was really complex and emotional. I cried at the end when the girl broke down at the verdict. It’s so heartbreaking seeing someone trying to communicate, but not being able to. Her mom especially was a total bitch, manipulating her thoughts, and then abusing Youngwoo.

Like I get it, being a family member of someone who has a mental development delay myself, it’s terrifying to think of them getting taking advantage of. But she still had no right to yell at Youngwoo that way (that scene broke my heart), or force her own thoughts onto her daughter, who was clearly terrified of her. Speaking of which, I got the feeling her scratching her hand once she got home after she had sex was her being worried about her mother’s reaction and/or her experiencing a sensory overload.

Also, regarding the bullshit the mom was saying, Youngwoo is way more qualified to talk about autism in general than she is. Yes, it’s a spectrum, but she still has more in common with someone else on the spectrum than a neurotypical person does.

Lastly, I know it’s realistic, but I just hate how so many of the clients take out their anger on Youngwoo only simply because they don’t respect her and because they know she can’t retaliate due to her diagnosis. They don’t even care when they trigger her. They wouldn’t treat other attorneys like that.

5) Junho really needs better friends (when I saw that bitch from the other episode, I screamed).

I’m glad he did end up telling them off in a way. That “sympathy” asshole was so disgusting in particular (he basically admitted to taking advantage of that person).

Again, while realistic, I feel bad for Junho and Youngwoo because they’ll have to deal with ableists making assumptions about their relationship forever...

Junho not being afraid to introduce Youngwoo as his girlfriend though👌🏼👌🏼👌🏼.

6) Why, oh why, is fucking Minwoo digging his nose into other people’s business??? He really never learns, does he. Like, he’s really trying to drag Youngwoo down by any means. He’s so fucking pathetic, he will never be redeemed in my eyes. Because even after being called out multiple times, he still chooses to be an ableist dickbag.

7) Taesumi has some fucking gall, she’s such a fucking bitch. Youngwoo’s dad had every right to be livid.

I just hope he won’t actually do as she said without Youngwoo’s consent (based on his reaction, I don’t think so but you never know what the writers decided). In the first place, I don’t think Youngwoo would want to go since moving would be a big change for her and she already has everyone she cares about around her.

Also, what “treatments” was this bitch talking about? Autism isn’t something you “cure”.

8) To end off, the kissing scene!!! I loved how the kiss wasn’t perfect from the get-go and going back to their communication, how Youngwoo wasn’t afraid to ask for guidance and how Junho wasn’t afraid to explain. They are so fucking adorable, I can’t stop smiling whenever I see them on screen together.

P.S. When Junho answered that yes, he’ll keep loving Youngwoo despite knowing about all the hardships in their way, I COLLAPSED.

[antonblastdeluxe]

neurotypical people be normal about mental disorders challenge (this is about the asylum au)

Gonna be frank even if the OP of the au or anyone defending it is indeed neurodivergent, their experiences are far from universal. As somebody who has had friends be put into mental institutions for a plethora of reasons, trying to depict what is clearly nothing more than an angst-bait AU as a 'comedic' one is so. Tonedeaf??? Where's the humor in somebody clearly having an episode being restrained and depicted as 'wROW isN'T he being SOOOOO irrational'???

I'm noticing some big artists in the community defend it but it's so clear they're only doing it because they're friends with OP of the AU... It's just disappointing! It's 2023. There are so many genuinely non-offensive ways to joke about mental health or even make it comedic.

This post goes more into depth on why such AUs are not only offensive but even outdated & not accurate in its depictions. But my two cents is that, from a writer's perspective, what is there to do with these AU's. Like, okay, your main character is in a mental institution, now what? How many jokes can you make about delusions or interactions with the staff you can have before it gets boring and/or needs to conclude given that the AU revolves around this one place and concept? Huh???

Boring, ableist ass genre of AU's. I know the PT fandom is technically stagnating in popularity but I wasn't expecting stupid 'grasping for popularity' AUs until 2024, boy does fandom work fast.

[hopebridge]

Creating a Supportive Environment for Children with Autism to Thrive

Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD) affects millions of children worldwide, impacting their communication, behavior, and social interaction. Helping children with autism thrive daily requires creating a supportive environment that meets their unique needs. This article will explore practical ways to create a supportive environment for children with autism.

Understand their perspective

Children with autism may perceive the world differently than neurotypical children. They may be hypersensitive to certain stimuli, have difficulty understanding social cues, or struggle with abstract concepts like time. Understanding their perspective is key to creating a supportive environment. Take the time to observe their behavior and identify triggers or stressors. Try to see the world through their eyes and adjust the environment accordingly.

Create a sensory-friendly space.

Sensory processing issues are common among children with autism. Creating a sensory-friendly space can help them regulate their nervous system and reduce anxiety. Consider using dimmer lights, soft music, and calming scents to create a relaxing environment. Providing sensory items like weighted blankets, fidget toys, or noise-canceling headphones can also be helpful.

Establish a predictable routine.

Children with autism thrive on structure and routine. Establishing a predictable routine can help them feel more secure and reduce anxiety. Try to set a consistent schedule for waking up, going to bed, mealtimes, and other daily activities. Keeping a visual schedule of the day's events can also be helpful for children with autism.

Communicate clearly and visually.

Many children with autism have difficulty communicating and expressing their needs and desires. Communicating clearly and visually can help them understand what is expected of them and express themselves. Use simple language, repetition, and visual aids such as pictures or diagrams to help them understand expectations.

Encourage play and social interaction.

Play is essential to childhood and helps children develop social skills, creativity, and problem-solving abilities. Children with autism often struggle with imaginative play and may prefer repetitive or solitary activities. Encouraging play by providing opportunities for social interaction and introducing new toys and games can help them develop these important skills.

Use positive reinforcement

Positive reinforcement is a powerful tool for encouraging desirable behavior in children with autism. This involves rewarding good behavior with praise, attention, or other rewards. Be specific about what behavior you reinforce and use immediate feedback to help them understand what they did well.

Seek professional support

Raising a child with autism can be challenging, and it is essential to seek professional support. A team of professionals, including doctors, therapists, and educators, can provide valuable guidance and support for your child's development and behavior. They can also provide resources and strategies for managing specific challenges associated with autism.

In conclusion, creating a supportive environment for children with autism to thrive requires understanding their perspective, creating a sensory-friendly space, establishing a predictable routine, communicating clearly and visually, encouraging play and social interaction, using positive reinforcement, and seeking professional support. Remember that every child with autism is unique, and finding the right strategies and support may take time and experimentation. With patience, understanding, and a commitment to meeting their unique needs, you can help your child with autism reach their full potential.

[soundsaboutrighttumblr]

WBL meta

On the two cups and their metaphor in the Pei Shou Yi and Yu Zhen Xuan couple.

You know, I might be reaching. But here’s what the metaphor and symbolism of those two cups extend to, for me:

They might just be a metaphor for their ways of processing and handling their emotions.

A cup as an artisan-created vessel to hold shapeless liquid that might be their inner lives, their emotions and raw feelings. A cup as a tool - like a sytematic (cognitive) approach - to hold this inherently shapeless matter and contain it in safe and certain confines, a cup that has a handle, for you to grip it and direct it to your mouth, to drink from it, and digest it.

The surface that comes into contact with Pei Shou Yi’s mouth has a crack, there’s something broken, or at least more difficult to use with that damaged intermediate piece that connects cup and mouth, feelings and the self, and their bringing the two together.

Pei Shou Yi gives Zhen Xuan the grey cup. Back when Zhen Xuan has alll the raw feelings, but no way to handle them, digest them, communicate them other than violence.

In tutoring and giving his life tracks to run in, Pei Shou Yi hands him the cup, tools to put a handle on his emotions, contain and digest them.

There’s also the distinctive sameness of those cups.

They are of the same design, made up of the same stuff so to say, as I think Pei Shou Yi recognizes the similarities in their challenges with processing and handling emotions, even if they are not exactly alike.

Pei Shou Yi’s affective disoder and alleged alexithymia, the difficulty in identifying and naming emotions, and Zhen Xuan’s Autism Spectrum disorder, both make them in need of a systematic approach to proccessing their inner workings inside the challenges of this society, maybe more than for neurotypical persons.

There may be possible traumata that have not been mentioned in the show contributing to their personalities as well, but this alone is a unifying trait, their challenge in living their emotions.

They both need that tool to learn to handle themselves in a way that allows them to heal from the wounds this rigid world has inflicted on them, to arrive at living life in a way they can benefit from and enoy and still be themselves.

Another thing that this metaphor shows us:

Pei Shou Yi’s cup has been in constant use.

He may say he has no feelings, may tell Zhen Xuan there’s nothing there, and we don’t know exactly how much he believes that himself - there’s hints in the show that he actually does feel for Zhen Xuan all this time- but the show runners decided to show us him, unable to let go of that cup that links him to their shared history. They even show us Pei Shou Yi haunted, thinking of Zhen Xuan with that absent minded look on his face, holding that cup.

Him having something in that cup, trying and drinking from it, using it.

And then in that proposal scene at the bar, Pei Shou Yi hands Zhen Xuan his own brown cup to drink from.

And if that isn’t ever the most powerful and omptimistic and healing thing for his own arc, to allow Zhen Xuan acces to his emotions, held in a cracked vessel that you have to drink from with care as they may be.

The outro scenes have those two cups together on a table next to each other, one blueish grey, one brown with a crack, clearly in use. Together.

I am in love with this.

[shaaaaaaar]

also, since i’m rambling on tumblr a little bit i’m gonna continue to talk about thoughts and shit.

it’s kinda surprising to me how little i care about my comm class suddenly. it’s a requirement so that doesn’t help, but i also didn’t know that when signing up and it doesn’t really influence my lack of care.

i’m also surprised because my professor is genuinely really nice. i have some grief with her (which i will get into) but she’s like, genuinely very nice. she’s caring, and she clearly likes what she’s teaching. she dedicates a lot of energy to her teaching and her students.

but despite that, there’s a lot that feels… meh to me about this class.

firstly, my peers give even less of a shit than i do. like, our class is not active at all. it’s partly due to the class being required so many people just don’t care and partly due to the class being at 9 am, but the vibe of the class is kinda unnerving for me in a way that’s hard to describe. even the professor often comments about how quiet we are.

i also feel really bad for my professor due to how distant my class is. she genuinely cares about us and the topic and isn’t getting that reception. i remember i had to ask if i could do my first speech at the last day availible because i wasn’t able to work on it earlier, i had an essay to finish that was more pressing. and she replied that she gets it, a lot of kids put her class at the end of their priorities (and added its probably bc comm is required). and i felt so bad in that moment, firstly because her class isn’t at the back of my priorities at all (i just hadn’t gotten started because my mental health crashed for two weeks and that put me behind on work; the essay i worked on instead was a week late when i got it in because of that crash) and secondly because like holy shit that’s so sad to hear, especially with how much care she gives to us and to her job.

and i know i’m part of the problem, since i have fallen more into the “doesn’t give a shit anymore” crowd. wouldn’t be fair to hide that. but also, i really do feel like she deserves better. it’s not fun for anyone involved when our class is completely dead. it also worsens my lack of active present-ness in class because i end up feeling awkward as the one guy speaking up a bunch, so i shy away a little bit.

secondly, i don’t like the material of our class in a… very strange way. see, my textbook is actually insanely inclusive. it’s mindful of and highlights how different cultures communicate, puts effort into not being extremely eurocentric, addresses race and being respectful of that, and addresses a lot of topics relating to inclusivity. hell, there was an entire section about trans people and on several occasions queer people have also come up to challenge heteronormative beliefs. aroace people are never addressed (which i was looking for in the romance chapter out of curiosity and because i am aroace myself) but i kind of expected that anyway because aro/ace invisibility what’s new.

but it’s baffling to me that, despite how otherwise inclusive the book is, neurodivergent people are never brought up. neurodivergency can often impact the ways people communicate (it does for me at the very least) and i think it should be important to at the very least note that neurodivergent people exist.

i’ve often felt very isolated in class because of my neurodivergency making a lot of what we talk about more difficult for me. nonverbal communication was a strange unit for me because everyone had a much better read on stuff like body language than i did. and it’s so odd to me that the book can be so inclusive while also being focused exclusively on neurotypical people.

lastly, i think my professor is doing… not the best job at teaching us. not because she’s a bad professor, because she’s not. the issue is she’s extremely light on us. in some cases it’s extremely helpful, for example we all need to pass two speeches to get credit for the course and she’s letting people redo speeches if we get below a certain grade (either if you fail it or get a c or below). but sometimes she is way too coddling.

we have to do an interpersonal theatre paper. it was first a film paper, but she made it a theatre paper bc students often don’t turn it in. making it a theatre paper would base the essay off of our school play, which we got free tickets to watch, and the professor said we could work together on it. which is fair, and i appreciate the consideration!

but by working on it, i mean doing a lot of it in class. fine, but sometimes its a little much. i’m talking about figuring out the headers within the paper, structuring the paper together, gathering topic ideas all together, like a lot of the work is being taken out. which is still fine i suppose, maybe i’m just an overachiever by being bothered.

except one of the things the professor did is literally write an introduction for us, give permission to literally copy and paste it, and said it can count as one of our two sources. the theatre show counts as a source too. that’s WAY too much coddling for me, hell no. at that point, might as well write the whole damn essay for us.

i talked about it with my dad on the way home from therapy this week and he brought up that the help being offered is still way too much but it’s good for kids that really are just there for the requirement; it’s a case of “you get what you give”. it’s an easy a, after all. and he’s right, but this is both a literal college class and also retracting from a lot of the skills being practiced in this essay. i’m biased in being frustrated, after all i’m a writer (i hope), but i still think it’s a little excessive how much easier the essay is being made to be.

essay tangent aside, the professor is often very light when it comes to stuff in class in general. i cherrypicked an extreme case, but there’s still a lot of smaller instances of this same coddling. and i get it. she genuinely wants the best for her students. she wants everyone to succeed, she wants to accomodate for everyone and she genuinely cares about us. that is invaluable in a professor. but you can still be flexible and work with students in a way that’ll help them succeed, but also not make class into a walk in the park. while i appreciate what she’s doing, i think she’s leaning too far into being lenient, to the point where it’s detrimental.

though in fairness, an easy professor like her is something many students want. i’m just not one of those people.

i’ve been noticing that, across the course of the semester, i’ve become less and less inclined to speak and be active in class. honestly, i’ve been getting shyer too, i don’t like participating. and every time i wonder to myself “huh, guess i’m just having a day.” only to go to my english class directly after and be extremely active and talkative and present.

and as someone whos default in classes is to be someone very present and active in class, it’s… not a good sign that i’m acting so differently in my comm class.

[hybrid-machine]

Autistic shut downs are super weird.

My life has never been so busy. Thesis level busy. Functionally scattered. Today was fkd. Running from meetings at placement to counselling clients to supervision to a group presentation with real industry clients for a university group project. We had to pitch our ideas (designing a therapeutic program for a real school). Our group has been under pressure, had member conflicts, dramas, we've been rushed. And I've had to take a leadership role through a lack of group structure, which is challenging for me but good growth. Also frustrating when juggling challenging group dynamics and some members not pulling their weight. Initiating tasks, prompting, structuring, communicating, it's exhausting. Most of the group have their shit together at least now. But holy shit I'm so ready to be done with academia, with volunteer placement, and disability work which isn't secure work. My goal is just do the one thing and earn enough to just never have to survive again. Be financially secure that we're not stressed, trapped, worried and unable to afford necessities.

So I crashed hard when I got home. My brain was so confused, I couldn't think clearly, I was teary, I couldn't speak clearly. I had to watch comfort shows and fall asleep to them to regulate the tension in my body.

This choice I've made, is challenging work.

All the while my cars breaking down, our finances are breaking down, my partners MH also breaking down, I'm barely keeping up cleaning/cooking at home now.

Can't keep up with the neurotypical world.

I've learned so much though, about my resilience, my problem-solving, my capacity to keep learning and connecting to others in deeper ways. Trust and letting go. Grief and trauma aren't as triggering anymore through the forced self-development of this course. It's forced me to be a better human. And set better boundaries and be accountable and connected to community.

But as to free time, free thought, leisure, what is that. That's such a luxury. This last academic push is brief. It's ok. It's gonna be ok.

[vroenis]

The Last Sunday

You certainly look like you have your life together and that's not facetious, I know tone is rough on the internet - sincerity is scary after all (note from the next day: oh-ho-hoooo what a foreshadowing!).

If there's one thing I've become by whatever means, internal or otherwise, it's become more sincere. I have a lot of confidence which is odd. Confidence in some specific things, things I'm fairly sure I know the shape of. The rest - what I'm supposed to do, what I'm able to do, I've no idea. I don't have a template for that and I suspect I know the immediate response to that but I have good excuses, in that they're actually debilitating, not figuratively.

Somewhere back along the road my thoughts have taken tonight was a further meditation on intimacy and ownership, or perhaps the vernacular around it, taxonomy even.

I thought about the love songs I've struck from my collection, the ones I hear that immediately set me on edge;

"... make you mine..."

"... I belong to you..."

"... give myself / yourself..." etc. which is a particularly strange one. The act of giving is meaningful and I'll say in a cursory sense for now, not harmful, but that's not really the application in romantic works.

This sense of possession - and that it's key, important, normal, empowered, central. Etcetera.

I'm not interested in owning anyone. I'm not interested in bring owned. The initial association would be to blunt dimensions of slavery and there's a decent element of truth in that. There's nothing good about enslaving and being enslaved.

Nor is this a "we're all free lol I can fuck who I want" and everything that comes loaded with the concept of monogamy at least how it's most commonly understood and applied. I've not really spent a lot of time in a polyamorous relation but I've high contact with a decent handful of folks who do it full time and they're great, close friends, seem to get on fine with their own challenges no doubt. For purely practical (more or less medical) reasons I don't think I have the energy and bandwidth for it myself so I'm pretty exclusive - also for many other reasons.

But ownership is weird. Utilising it in language as a banner of pride is weird. I don't know, maybe for folks it's normal and maybe that's a significant part of why I don't like it. I've not had a normal life. I've not had access to the same things, the same assumptions as normal folks. Let's be blunt - white cis-het neurotypical folks. Hey it's no slight against any of you and again I'm being sincere - it absolutely isn't your fault that you fit in nicely with the societal norms we've constructed over tone as humans, and today isn't the day for hashing that particular facet of culture our, and what you can do about it etc. You're good. I don't hate the straights.

I believe I continue to struggle with relating to people. This is an odd thing for me to say at this specific time of writing (October 2022) given I'm currently experiencing a rapid but I think firm expansion of my social circle. Nevertheless I do think it's tied to the way I position myself when considering romantic intimacy. I pretty much begin from the same position;

- - assume I'm not welcome, will not be treated with generosity and difference, make no assumption of mutual intention, diminish my presence as much as possible...

... unless the other person makes an effort to clearly communicate and display affirmative behaviour and intent - -

Is that an Autistic thing? Is it a queer thing? Bipolar? The combination thereof? Is it a defensive position taken up by being an outsider regardless of why?

I don't know what signals I'm supposed to be sending romantically. Something about that doesn't sit right with me. Decletations or even suggestions, uninvited and not mutually initiated feel entitled and intrusive. I'm demonstrating my intentions on the assumptions not only that they're welcome, but that they're reciprocated. What a fucken dick move, honestly. I don't understand how that's kind, respecting, mutual and empowered in any way.

So I operate platonic friendships much the same way scaled back from there. If you don't demonstrate to me that you want my time, I assume you don't... which is fine and very normal. I figure most friends I make happen more or less mutually by us displaying and demonstrating an interest in one another, on casual levels first, then with increasing intimacy. Slowly sharing more interpersonal and intersocial elements of our lives, remembering, taking particular note of, and displaying knowledge of one another - treating with difference.

Scaling back up, for most of my life that's been my developing understanding of romantic intimacy, how I understand it. There's no withholding, there's no provocation of risk, there's no game, there simple is or is not engaged and either state is fine.

Ownership/possession seems to disempower that.

Assuming that I have rights regardless of mutual consent, is to me a horrifying concept. Giving someone rights and privileges to the extent of diminishing autonomy is equally as horrifying.

My understanding of how I love, and how I'm interested in being loved, what I want - what I expect - is that it's a choice. A set of actions, behaviours, access and privileges granted with mutual empowerment, that any one person can freely withdraw from at any time.

Sure, there are some really good social structures like respect we can load onto that, as in, when you want to leave, you hopefully respect the other person enough to declare what's happening... by the same token, if the other person is abusive, you hopefully respect yourself enough to know you don't owe them anything and you take care of yourself in the safest way possible (I know, heaps to unpack about that but there's a lot of great writing around if you look for it and much better than I could discuss here).

A while back I wrote that happy endings were for straight, neurotypical people and I stand by that. I know the shape of things that make me happy when I'm on my own but shared happiness is something I've decided has value and it's incredibly rare. When I'm in the midst of a depressive cycle, I deploy a frame that states "I don't know what happiness is // I don't remember what happiness is" and in the place where I am, it's very true.

I have more to say but it's late and I'm tired.

[spongebob-autisticquestions]

Do you ever feel like sometimes the autistic community forgets or outright excludes severely/mentally impaired autistic people? Obviously I don't mean every autistic person does this but I see some absolutely awful things said by other autistic people. On Facebook I've seen two different posts in the past few days about someone they're not like the "nonverbal potato" autistic people and someone else saying not all autistic people are stupid. It sucks bc a mentally impaired autistic person can't necessarily comprehend and explain their needs as a mentally impaired autistic person and to see other autistic people deny their worth based on being "smarter" than mentally impaired people is awful. I also hate it when someone says autistic people deserve to be proud and open bc they have higher IQs and can be better at math/science/art than neurotypical because when someone says that they're not just saying they're better than neurotypicals they're also saying they're better than autistic people with low IQs who may have severe struggles with math and science and never make complex art. Idk like autism advocacy and pride should be rooted in the fact were people, and not how much smarter or better we can be than neurotypicals.

Part 2. It also bugs me for these same reasons when people say autistic people are the next evolutionary step and will run the world bc not all of us will and that's okay. We're not any less deserving of love, care, and advocacy if we can't be considered superior or able to run the world. Also don't like when people deny or cover up the more challenging symptoms of autism. Like when someone will avoid or lie about how autistic people can struggle with aggression and self injury. If you can't advocate for autistic people without presenting a scrubbed clean version of what autism is, then you're ableist. I saw an autistic woman claim autistic children never struggle with aggression or self injury and if they did then they clearly had PTSD. This is absolutely false and it breaks my heart that people feel like autistic people can't be accepted or proud unless they are palatable. In addition, aggression and self injury can be dangerous and it's important to acknowledge and make sure children who struggle with it can be safe and cared for and learn methods for coping. You can't do this for autistic children if you deny their struggles are related to their autism and insist the symptoms doesn't exist and if it does, must be something else.

I've seen this too. Like claiming it isn't a disability (sorry, but doing that makes it look like the person sees disability as a bad thing). And although autism isn't a mental illness, I've seen posts say it in a way that kinds feels like it throws people with mental illnesses under the bus

Though it's an extreme minority, I think the ones that bother me most are the ones that claim we don't need help. When they claim we need more understanding, but then argue against any way people may try and help us, or get immediately aggressive when a neurotypical person tries to understand which things are ableist and which arent

I'd say most of the autistic community is great, but there's a minority which are quite vocal that bother me

[katatonicimpression]

Neurodivergence in Generation X Part 4:

The Twist

Heads up I hate this.

As I said before, the Monet we see across Generation X is actually four different people. There’s the twins (Claudette and Nicole) who control the “Monet” we see up until #31, the real Monet and Penance, the red demon-like creature that Monet is trapped inside. In revealing this twist to the audience, the series makes some weird decisions so I guess I’ll have to talk about it.

This is also where I talk about the more serious ableism in this series. Hopefully it won’t get too heavy.

In a staggeringly unnecessary move, it is revealed that one of the twins, Claudette, is autistic and not Monet - "Monet"’s catatonic spells were apparently a manifestation of Claudette’s autism and had nothing to do with Monet at all. To this day, Monet is assumed to be neurotypical in canon.

So why do they do this? Well, honestly it’s because they think autism is a bad thing. The initial reveal that Monet might have autism is handled like it’s a goddamn horror movie.

We’re supposed to think this is horrifying. And the idea of autism ultimately being a bad thing that can befall a person persists throughout the series.

Now, it might seem obvious why this is ableist but I’m going to spell it out just in case. While ASD is (by most people’s reckoning) a disability, that is not the same as it being a “thing that is wrong with you”. It’s not wrong or right, good or bad, it’s just one of many things that might be true of a person. This attitude - the attitude that autism is some horrible tragedy - has horrific effects in real life. It leads parents to not get their kids tested because they think the label will ruin their lives, thus denying them the support they need. It leads parents to put their children through horrible, even abusive, treatments to “cure” them. It’s the driving force behind the anti-vaxx movement which has cost children their lives. It’s not a new attitude, and Generation X is hardly the most egregious example of it but it is something that should never go unchallenged.

There’s also an unfortunate implication in how this manifests in the story because of the context. Monet is perfect. Her powers are perfect. She’s her dad’s favourite. Her brother envies her for this reason. Whether intentional or not, the implication here is that one of Monet’s “perfections” is that she’s neurotypical - that her sister has some flaw that she lacks. Now, if this story was being told from Claudette’s perspective maybe that’s something that could be interesting to explore, maybe use Claudette and Monet's relationship to challenge the idea that there’s something wrong with her. But that’s not the story they’ve told. They’re not even doing the “Look, Monet’s not perfect, she’s actually autistic.” route (I’m not saying that’s a good idea, but it’s at least an idea).

Instead, what they do is just leave that implication hanging there; That Monet is perfect in part because she’s neurotypical and Claudette is flawed because she’s autistic. Yay.

So I really don’t like this and part of me just doesn’t accept it. I have two reasons why.

1. The twins-controlled version of Monet still had her Personality and Intellect.

When operating “Monet”, the twins tap into her real powers - her strength, flight, telepathy and (crucially) her intellect. They clearly have some access to something that would normally be considered part of Monet's mind.

Most of the time we spend with Monet she doesn’t act like two children, but instead like herself. “Monet” does start acting childish right before her true nature is revealed. Between #25 and #31, “Monet” is immature, overly emotional and kind of dumb in a way that is a massive contrast to how she was before. Now, obviously the writers are spreading seeds of intrigue before the twist with her behaviour in these issues. But the thing that stands out to me is how much it implies that the twins were, at least initially, authentically recreating Monet’s personality.

It is made very clear that "Monet" is definitely more than simply the combination of the twins.

This is subjective (ok all of this has been super subjective) but “Monet” starts to act more like the twins after dealing with Black Tom Cassidy which is, by no coincidence, exactly when Penance starts to come into her own (by just slashing the everloving shit out of that man). By my reading, when Monet starts to emerge within Penance, “Monet” starts to lose her Monet-ness and become more like the twins.

This is also supported by the fact that when we do finally meet Monet as herself, she acts very much like “Monet” did when we first met her.

So - bear with me - if “Monet” is autistic and “Monet” has Monet’s personality and intellect, then why the hell isn’t Monet also autistic? Seriously, why wouldn’t she be? The writers have adopted a “autism is stored in the consciousness” approach and, like, I just don’t think that’s how brains work.

2. Monet still reads as Neurodivergent even if they didn’t intend it.

As I said, Monet’s personality remains pretty consistent once she’s restored to her own body, albeit without the catatonic episodes. So she’s still abrupt, bad at reading a room, self-conscious but somehow not self-aware - all of the things I’ve talked about that made me relate to her and see her as neurodivergent are still there.

Also there’s Penance. Penance represents a lot of things, but the most obvious thing - the thing they keep hitting you over the head with in this series - is that Monet’s experience of being trapped inside the voiceless Penance is a direct parallel to “Monet’s” catatonic state. I don’t think I can express quite how obvious this is when you’re reading this: Penance is an extended metaphor for the way autism can rob you of your ability to communicate and how that leads you to be seen as (and even feel) other, less than normal, inhuman maybe.

This is all deliberate, but the writers (due to the aforementioned ableism - the fact that they see autism as a flaw) don’t follow through with the conclusion the metaphor implies. The most natural reading of Penance is to conclude that Monet is autistic like Claudette.

Conclusion

In a way, if you feel represented by something, then you have been. I see a lot of myself and my own experiences in Monet and that really is enough. She is still subtextually autistic, even if she’s denied the label. From what I've seen, many people in fandom agree with me (tldr: the fan wiki says she's not autistic, tumblr says she is).

However, I do wish they would retcon the “don’t worry she isn’t actually autistic” vibe. Just a little moment in X-corp or something to confirm she is neurodivergent. No need to make a big deal over it - I certainly don’t want another horror-style reveal - but it would be nice to have textual confirmation.

I hope I’ve made it clear why I think Monet is a genuinely interesting example of autistic representation. She contains multitudes (sometimes literally) and goes beyond tired cliches. To see an autistic character like her - a layered and nuanced woman of colour - is really rare.

Generation X is not good at talking about neurodivergence - in fact, it’s often kind of yikes - but I still found it interesting. Hopefully, if you’ve somehow read to the end of this, you did too.

-------------------

Part 1

Part 2

Part 3

[brightlotusmoon]

A friend in my cerebral palsy said something that fascinated me.

See, some people in the disabled community apparently feel that self care is narcissistic and too centering. That we must instead be challenged to move out, create movements, advocate harder, that we can't be heard if we're philosophically self involved or centered.

So my friend asked this: "...but is this challenging people or actively harming people? I think any self-centering we do is because we have to do the work ourselves even though we are one fifth the population. We carry a lot of weight. I’ve been “challenged” on Twitter, and it never felt right. I think at the end of the day this is Facebook. It’s easy to think that it’s “just online” or that intent is very clear, but in fact neither come to pass."

The disability community is so often forgotten or propped up as scapegoats without help that any type of kindness towards ourselves is far more powerful than trying to push abled neurotypicals who clearly don't care enough to help advocate for us. Maybe we center instead of expand to protect our interests.