#problematic they/them rep

[bymyblackhand]

Kris Deltarune is just like me fr

[so-you-melted-22]

Honestly, I forget how little representation there is for ace and aro people every year, until pride month rolls around.

There are all these posts going around recommending queer movies and books and tv shows and comics and what not and it covers most identities and has a wide variety of different stories, but if there is anything with aces or aros included it’s always the same three shows. It’s kinda sad and annoying.

Most (of the few) depictions of asexual and/or aromantic characters are in tv shows aimed at highschoolers, which isn’t wrong, but once you’ve graduated it stops being particularly relatable. I wish I had some extensive history of aro-ace film and literature where I could pick and choose based on my mood and personal preferences. Instead I have to scavenge the internet high and low for something that might possibly have characters that are like me. Wether or not the rest of the plot seems enticing to me be damned.

[killrabbit]

the whole pitting mj and jv against each other is sooo fucking tired

[triaelf9]

sees a post that's like "LOOK, LOOK AT ME I HAVE TERRIBLE MEDIA LITERACY LOOOOK AHAHA ISN'T THAT FUNNY"

Checks bio

"I'm 21"

Ah, yes. You're in the age group to have been hit by the resurgence of purity culture. I'm so sorry.

[moistvonlipwig]

well. no. not really. the bury your gays trope has roots in the hayes code which mandated that gay/queer/'deviant' characters be shown as villainous and/or die by the end of the story. (i do think we're past the point where any instance of a dead lgbt+ character counts as byg for the record; i would say now it more has to do with whether the character's death is or appears to be associated with their queerness in the language of film, whether or not they're the only lgbt+ character/half of the only lgbt+ couple, whether the purpose is to create tragedy for their partner if they have one and little else, how violent/shocking the death is, etc. -- metrics like that.) but it's not really about whether or not it serves the journey of the 'straight protagonist'. that's much more akin to how the fridging of female characters works. by this definition cl*xa wouldn't count as byg and i thought that was pretty universally considered a prime example lol

[bluedalahorse]

Man, I wish people would not use “YA” as a shorthand for “bad unnuanced teenager fiction” and also not assume that all YA authors think the same way about literature.

There’s a post I would reblog because it’s making some really good points, most of which I agree with, but a lot of these good points are also framed by a hook that is unnecessarily aggressive toward YA authors in general.

Like I get that there are some YA authors with really annoying thoughts out there—any writing-geared-toward-an-age-group is going to have writers with annoying thoughts—but uh. Way to overlook seriously great writers like Rita Williams-Garcia and Jacqueline Woodson and Malinda Lo and Dean Atta and Joy McCullough and Kiyash Moncef and Nic Stone and Nick Brooks and Jason Reynolds and Elizabeth Acevedo and Traci Chee and Nina LaCour and Randy Ribay and countless others really.

[the-indigo-symphony]

Everyone wants queer rep and queer ships but no one wants queer characters

[roomba-mangga]

is it more aro coded to declare your lack of attraction to anyone or anything on-page and have a desire demon take the form of the mother you never knew or is it more aro coded for your heart to belong solely to the monstrous and grotesque while you grapple with a deep seated resentment for humanity due to the ways it's repeatedly failed you in spite of how much compassion you still hold for it or is it more aro coded to be so devastatingly loyal to your family that you drag an entire continent into the blackest pits of the earth in a desperate bid to secure eternal life for them only to be stripped of your sanity and will to live

[outeremissary]

Think everyone needs to know about my friend's new discourse proposal, which is "last letter of LGBTQIA+ wins" when having discourse about a character who holds multiple identities. You can only have discourse about that aspect of their gender or sexuality.

[fappellmoan]

if i have to see normies on the internet going ‘the characters in bottoms r AWFUL and TOXIC but i love them’ i will explode and die and i’m not joking like shut uppp lolll no fr like stop.

[grimalkhiindi]

Whenever I do get around to watching Hazbin Hotel, I'm going to be so annoying about it.

[bottom-lexa]

Me between 13-18: I literally cannot imagine dating a guy. Nope. Sounds wrong. Not for me. 0/10. Terrible thought.

Me between 19-22: Hmmm no I see the appeal but I don’t think I’d ever date a guy or want to be that intimate with one. I’m wayyy more into women and just femininity in general. That’ll never change.

Me now at 24: *has all dating app preferences set to men only* *cant picture myself long term with a woman anymore* *fantasies consist of men and generally masculine folks* Well fuck how did this happen?

[butchvampireheimerdinger]

can we get butchfemme sevika/reader hcs please :3

GAWD yes. Lord, I've been waiting for this day lessgo

ButchFemme Sevika/Reader Headcanons

⚢ In typical butch fashion, her love language is acts of service

⚢ Loves to be fawned over ! Like “Omfg babe you’re sooo strong helping me put together furniture” and trust she is melting even though her face is expressionless and immoveable

⚢ She likes when you graze your long nails over her skin for back scratches and its all nice and light and tingly

⚢ She’s not much of a prettyboy (prettybutch…?) so she doesn’t really have a skincare routine but you have an extensive regimen so she memorizes all ur million little bougie products and gets you an extra to keep at ur place so you don’t have to eff up your skincare routine in favor of spontaneous sleepovers

⚢ Yeah she’s not too particular about her grooming in general. She lets you cut her hair even if you’re not super experienced with clippers. She still hypes you up even if you nick her ear when doing up her side shave/undercut.

“Oops! Sorry babe I think I got your ear…”

“Didn’t even feel it. You’re doing great baby keep going.”

⚢ On that note, pet names: For Sevika, its baby alll dayyyyyy ! She calls you baby, my girl, my pretty girl, my woman, etc. And as for what you call her, she always loves a “omg babe” moment. And “settle down there, cowboy” but in like a jesting sorta way. Also: “my butch.”

⚢ Stone top/pillow princess anybody?

⚢ Also: she’s ur cash cow. She loves buying you expensive shit and showing you off and showing off the expensive shit. You breathed in the direction of a particularly nice perfume? Surprise! It’s in your bathroom the following day. Like. It’s a theme. Especially in ur pre-relationship courting era. “Baby anything you want I get for you. Say the word I’ll buy for you the moon, the stars, et cetera, no one can provide for you like I can” blah blah blah

⚢ But you can’t be interrupting her card games tho. She’s like a teenage boy on the xbox with those things. Probs something to be worried about tbh.

⚢ And I’ve written this into a fanfic already, but that bitch wears boyshorts. I was thinking boxers for a while but I think that would be too much bulk over them skinny little plants she wears. I am a Sevika boyshorts TRUTHER

⚢ And she works out. Matter of fact, forget the prettybutch comment because Sevika WORKS OUTTT and I think she has resistance bands. Like she goes to an actual gym but around the house you’ll find her repping with those damn resistance bands to relieve stress or just cause she sees them and remembers.

⚢ And she works out to like. Classical music. Cause she’s a classy mothafuckaaa just absolutely getting ripped and her face is in a scary ass sneer but there's like ode to joy in the background

⚢ You pack her lunch. She gets flamed at work cause her paper bag is covered in lil hearts and stickers and kissy lipstick marks and its filled with sugary baked goods like pink sparkly cupcakes and fruity pastries cause u can’t cook. But by gawd u can bake.

⚢ That being said, she’s the cook in the relationship. Especially when it comes to meat. It’s problematic. Sevika’s version of “girl dinner” is straight up protein. Her typical meal is like. A rotisserie chicken + hard boiled eggs. It made you gasp the first time you saw her pull out one of her meal prep tins and it was just that.

⚢ Oh yeah and she meal preps

⚢ Claims she “doesn’t get sick” because her “immune system is just built different.”

⚢ When she does get sick, she refuses to chill out and let herself be sick and she tries to speedrun her way to health by taking too much vitamin C and then working out and cranking the heat to “sweat it out quicker.”

⚢ She knits to relieve stress

⚢ Sleeps topless and in undies. And a wife pleaser tank if its chilly.

[alphacentaurinebula]

wot relationship status: it's complicated

I have been agonising over Siuan's death pretty much nonstop, but I have come to a sort of detente with it and I want to share my thoughts in response to some of the common fan responses I've seen.

Was Siuan's death simply for Moiraine's character advancement? No, I really don't think so. Her speech was a beautiful, powerful scene. I have seen fans who feel she was dehumanised and denied dignity and that it was a degrading death. I really don't feel thats what we saw on our screens.

Yes, Siuan was subjected to dehumanising treatment; yes, her killers tried to degrade her and remove her dignity. But she was not bowed; she was not broken. She did not beg for her life, or try to appease her captors, or do anything to suggest that they had succeeded in their attempts to remove her dignity. Instead, she fought back. She stood proud, despite their treatment (treatment that reflected much more on them than it did on her). Her strength and bravery made them into the villains even in their own eyes, and her into a hero and a martyr.

The thing I haven't seen talked about is that she almost won. Deposed, stilled, sentenced to death, she still managed to almost talk the Hall down. She managed to instil fear and doubt in Elaida, a woman who never doubted herself a day in her life. We didn't get to see the Sitters present and their stirrings of doubt (I imagine mainly for production reasons so that they can be cast next season) but we absolutely see it on Elaida's face. The only person unaffected is Alviarin, who can see power slipping through her fingers, who can see that any moment the Hall is going to change its mind, which is why she acts when she does.

I liked that Siuan talked about Moiraine - that was part of her being able to finally tell the truth after all these years, to claim Moiraine publicly as she'd never been allowed to do. Anyone who's spent time being forced to hide a queer relationship will recognise the joy and relief she felt in that moment, which I could certainly see on her face. And I don't think the fact that she spoke of Moiraine, the fact that Moiraine gained a desperate determination from her death, means that her death was simply to serve Moiraine's story. I think to only see Moiraine in her death robs Siuan of the dignity and heroism she displayed, and of the triumph of her character.

But that's my in story world response. Do I think they should have done it? Fuck, no. The writers live in the real world; this show is being watched in the real world. I don't think all queer stories should have to be happy - they shouldn't be limited by previous failures in representation. I don't really feel this is a bury your gays moment, not with so much other queer rep on the show. But we all need happy queer stories. Especially right now, in this moment of dire attack on queer and trans rights. Goodness knows I watched the episode at a terrible time in the UK - literally the day before, a horrific court ruling attacking trans rights was announced, the latest in a series of attacks on trans lives in this country. I needed my happy queer WoT world, and my happy queer WoT fandom.

And whilst there was nothing racial about her death within the world of the show, once again we are living in THIS world, and in this world, it feels problematic at best. (though I stand by my point above that Siuan's role was NOT just to further her white girlfriend's story)

I've seen multiple responses, including from the showrunner, saying that Siuan's plot in the books after the coup was a step down for the character. And whilst sure, I can agree that many elements of her plot are shit - they could simply have changed them. NO ONE needed Gareth Byrne, fuck that entire situation, but the writers could simply have changed that. She could have been in Salidar briefly and then gone off to rescue a doorwayed Moiraine. The writers are the ones making the decisions. They could have made different decisions.

I do think that her death will make Egwene's time in the Tower even more meaningful and triumphant; I do think it will make the Salidar storyline feel more poignant; I do think it will haunt Elaida for the rest of her reign; I do think Siuan as a martyr will add to the narrative tapestry of the rest of the show; I do think they're going to kill Moiraine permanently not doorway her and that this makes more sense with Siuan already dead. I just don't feel any of that is enough reason to lose her from the show.

I also understand the production considerations. I am professionally familiar with tv production - I know how crucial cast availability is, especially with a production this size and with the budgets involved. If it was me, I would simply have had Elaida send her off somewhere to be imprisoned. They could have kept her off screen until she was available/could become relevant to the plot.

Does this mean I don't want to see the "end game" that the writers have planned for Siuan and Moiraine? I ABSOLUTELY want to see it. I want them to make this better. I want my fishwives to have as close to a happy ending as they can get. Life is a dream from which we all must wake, and I want them to have time together in that waking, and for us to see them get it right, to see them happy as they have absolutely earned. Whether the show will manage to get that ending right? I have no idea. But I really want them to. I really want to see it.

So basically - I'm still angry, sad, and very very hurt. But I also don't want this to ruin my love of this show. Sometimes I feel we are the harshest to those who actually try. The show is flawed, but it does have a large and diverse cast, people of colour in many key roles, queer people of all varieties, a mix of talent in front of and behind the camera. It might fail sometimes but at least it tries.

I want the show to continue. I want to see my other favourite characters live their stories. I want to see Egwene come into her own, I want to see Nynaeve be the badass she is, I want to watch Elayne figure out how to do things no one had done in 3000 years, I want to see where they are going with Show Min, I want more of perrin, I want Mat to sleep with a dude, pretty please.

I think I'm most angry that this has stripped a lot of the joy of fandom from me, and caused so much pain to so many people. I wanted to be shouting about WoT from the rooftops at the moment - I wanted to be campaigning for renewal. But whilst it has robbed me of that fervour, I still want to see the show survive and thrive. I do want it to be renewed. And I do want my Siuriane end game.

[cripplecharacters]

Thank you so much for this blog. Can I take a moment to ask the rest of your followers to please stop using it to ask for *permission* to write whatever they're trying to write? On every ask that starts with "can I write XYZ?", I just wanna grab the asker by the shoulders and ask back "what do you think is going to happen if you do?"

Since there's no ableism police going around inspecting amateur creative projects, this is really a poorly worded version of "is this bad/ableist/problematic/gonna get me cancelled/punished?", with an undercurrent of "am I bad? Am I a bad person? Please reassure me that I'm not a bad person", which is a hell of a lot to drop on a handful of strangers online who can only ever give you a bit of information and their own biased personal opinions.

I swear I'm not trying to be a jerk about this. It's good that so many people want to depict disability in fiction beyond flat stereotypes. But it's incredibly hard to create *anything* with this level of anxiety and craving for approval. It's sooo much better to be driven by playful curiosity. Learn to love research! Don't underestimate your capacity for critical thinking! Dare to form your own opinions! The worst that can (and will) happen is that you'll be wrong and make mistakes. Big deal.

I also invite everyone to get further along in the writing process before running to consult here. Writing is rewriting, and it's easier to rewrite what's already on the page than toy with hypothetical ideas forever. Tumblr jokes a lot about the mere existence of bad pieces of writing being "a hate crime", but let's get real. Your accidentally ableist first draft is not an act of violence, and treating it that way is not disability advocacy or activism or helpful to anyone.

Sorry if this ended up too long or verbose. What do you mods think? Agree/disagree?

I can't speak for the other mods but I mostly agree TBH.

There's much more to writing disabled characters than just getting a "stamp of approval" that what you're doing "is OK". And it's not that it's bad to consult others to make sure you're not being ableist (it isn't), but a good disabled character can't just be a character that's Not Offensive.

They should be well researched, they should be interesting, and they shouldn't just be there to be "good disabled rep". They should be a character, not a diversity quota to fill.

I've addressed the whole "no one is actually going to Cancel You if you write something ableist" in one of my older posts about writing characters with facial differences because it's true. One billion movies and series and comics come out every year and a ton of them are ableist, and I promise you no one is getting "cancelled" over having a villain with a scar.

I stopped answering those "is it ok if my villain is deformed and scarred?!??" asks because they don't really add anything, they're usually not looking to change anything or learn anything, they just want a Cripple's Stamp of Approval. And that's not going to result in a good character, ever, it's just like showing a thumbs up to a writer that it's OK for them to write this offensive thing. What's the point? If you want to write it so bad, just do it... There is no Council of Disfigured People that will cancel you and take your house. You don't need my permission to write a generic evil disfigured guy and I'm not going to grant it. If you don't want to actually learn or change anything, there's no point in asking.

As I said, that's my opinion and not necessarily representative of the other mods on the blog.

mod Sasza

As to my opinion I largely agree. You (the general you, not you specifically asker, which is what I will mean in this whole ask when I say 'you') can write whatever you want and no one will send you a certified letter by mail that says you are Cancelled or a Bad Person or whatever.

We just want people to do research and put thought behind what they're writing. To think about why things are considered ableist, by us or by anyone else. And we want people to make disabled characters be characters and not just a Trope.

We as a mod team, but also as just regular people, can't or control what anyone does or doesn't write/draw/do. No one can. If you want to write something we hate, then do it. We won't stop you. We can't. We just won't like it, but if you're that committed to writing what you're writing, you can live with that, or at least you should. Someone's specific piece of art/writing/etc won't change our minds on what we've previously stated. No, not even yours. But you can do it if you really want to because that's how being an individual person works.

mod sparrow

[five-thousand-loaves-of-bread]

never watched the good doctor n never plan to. so maybe not good person talk about this. but never plan to watch it because in fact kinda hate it (mainly because once someone be ableist about high support needs autism n excuse it using shaun & say how they know what HSN is because they call shaun is, n quoting, “very high support needs” n he very. much. not. but anyway) — so this also give weight to what am going say

do see how people make fun of shaun (main character). like “i am a surgeon/sturgeon” memes n so much more. my favorite show house md & keep especially see meme compare house with sean autism to make fun of shaun—make fun of irony of “shaun be explicit autistic but bad autism representation & house not supposed to be / not explicit (depend on interpretation) autistic but somehow way better autism rep than shaun” situation. like:

[id: two meme compare sean with house about autism.

1: left side is shaun screaming/meltdown in “i am surgeon” scene with “bad autism rep” write on top. right side house in prison suit with “good autism rep” write on top.

2: twitter screenshot from rooster @/ househiscane. left is picture of shaun n have “autistic doctor” non capitalized on top. right is picture of house with stereo n “AUTISTIC doctor” on top, with “AUTISTIC” in all caps. at time of screenshot, have 648k views.

end id]

n again, never watched the good doctor. so maybe in show there truly part where not great n ableist n problematic autism rep. BUT.

from all these memes. n all these people justify how they hate sean how them make fun of shaun is okay. don’t see evidence for how shaun & show represent autism in some truly problematic way.

instead. see visibly autistic person. see people describe trait of visibly autistic person. see people make fun of visibly autistic traits. see a visibly autistic and low support needs person.

see same rhetoric used by non autistic AND AUTISTIC people to make fun of n be ableist to me, visible autistic (high support needs) person. that am embarrassing. that am stereotype. that “no autistic person act like this.” that “you make me embarrassed be autistic.” that am make autistic people look bad. the r word.

every single one of those thing, have heard it also be use call shaun.

versus. house, he’s asshole, he’s visibly asshole, n because of that he’s dynamic he’s well rounded. but he’s not visibly autistic.

n so suspect in big part, or even, entire unspoken point of these comparison, or meme against shaun, is because. house is not visibly autistic so relatable n thus good to audience of mainly high masking autustics. he the real autism rep. he the good autism rep. he the ACTUALLY autistic rep. shaun is visibly autistic n thus not.

from crowd that champion unmasking! be free! be yourself! but say nothing, or in this case nothing good, about people who cannot mask or be put in genuine life danger if choose unmask. from crowd that say autistic meltdowns not tantrum! normalize autistic meltdown! it’s okay! don’t record or make fun of or comment on someone’s worst moments! but make fun of visibly autistic person meltdown in public.

although should not be surprised. should not be! this same crowd that not know what visibly autistic actually is. or even not believe it even exist. same crowd that think unmasking will make them visibly autistic same way it make me visibly autistic. same crowd that think it mean just some occasional happy hand flapping. same crowd that call themselves visibly autistic because they do those occasional hand flapping n in next sentence complain about be told “but you don’t look autistic.” same crowd that say autism not have look. same crowd that permanently group autism into invisibly disability.

same crowd that cannot fathom autistic person different from them.

same crowd that bully n exclude n speak over n be ableist towards me.

like it the autism show to acceptable make fun of, it the autistic character to acceptable make fun of. it the show n character where u can let out all your offensive edgy ableist anti-autistic feelings, go mask off about it. it acceptable. everyone do it. even autistic people do it. especially autistic people do it. especially high masking autistic do it. autistic people who do it n justify it okay because they autistic n that grant them free pass.

criticize how any show represent autism badly problematically. that okay! that acceptable! that great! not telling you you can’t. — don’t doubt in the good doctor there not parts that make you wince in bad way because it speak terribly for autism.

but if all your “reasoning” for why that autism rep is. traits of visibly autistic person. or, (not applicable in this case), traits of high support needs & traits of level 2/3 autism. it’s not criticism you just ableist.

you all say visibly autistic people get enough rep already that it’s time for low support needs invisibly autistic high masking autistic women (& white—but shhh that part shouldn’t be say out loud) be in center of representation.

you all can’t even handle a visibly autistic character that’s low support needs and CISGENDER WHITE MAN.

once again. am hate this fucking show. n am here defending it.

is it genuinely bad rep or is character just visibly autistic.