#rendezvous is such a good episode I love it so much

[wynandcore]

I Love how this episode allows Beck to be a teenager and the episode right after makes him experience trauma beyond repair

[whateverisbeautiful]

♥️Reveling in Richonne - TOWL

#16: The Secret Rendezvous (1.02)

gif cred: @riickgrimes

Ok, this scene has got to be a Top 5 TOWL scene for me. I love everything about Richonne's secret rendezvous from the 🔥 walk-up at the beginning to the passionate embrace at the end 😍...

So first we see Michonne talking to some CRM leaders during a vetting process. And again TOWL stayed aware of Danai’s flawless face card with the close-up shot. Contrasting the start of the episode when she says her name is Michonne, here she’s following what Rick told her and changing her name to introduce the CRM and us to a B named Dana Bethune.

Michonne is in her acting bag as she shares, “My name is Dana. And I’ve been out there a long time by myself. So long that it’s strange to hear my own voice.” Michonne smartly mixes truths into her lies as she tells them “I was in Georgia for a long time with my boyfriend and about 40 people” She really was in Georgia with her boyfriend both from before the apocalypse and the boyfriend-turned-husband she found in season 3 😋. 

Michonne says their group was led by leaders who she thought were good and says she was with her sister Elle, who was the HR lady from the caravan group at the top of the ep. Michonne says, “And then things changed. They changed. I saw it. I knew we should go. You always really know when to go.” Look at her passing Nat’s mentality down to the CRM. 😊 I was like CRM, y’all should be scared because a loyal person like Michonne is going to make sure Nat’s death is avenged. 💯

She’s asked about her weapon of choice and she says a Bo staff that she lost and is now making do with a knife. Playing up a certain aloofness Michonne looks at herself in the reflection of a window or two-way mirror idk. And you know while they’re observing her, sis is also observing everything about this place while trying to just appear more meek and even ditzy.

They ask if it bothers her that she’s being watched and it already shows how privy she is to things that she can tell she’s being surveilled. She softly says, “No I just haven’t seen myself in a while.”

gif cred: @riickgrimes

The CRM folk start telling Michonne about the place and how she can never leave and you can just see Michonne have a subtle reaction like 'Yeah alright we’ll see about that.' She knows that never-leave rule is about to get broken. Best believe.

They ask how she feels about the fact that she can’t leave and Michonne smiles and says, “I feel that what’s here, it’s what I’ve been looking for. It’s what I’ve been trying to believe in just a little while longer.” And not a lie was told right here. 💁🏽‍♀️

They have her baby up in this place so they absolutely do have what she’s been looking for. And I love her referencing the 'believe a little longer' motto from the iPhone and also how it again affirms that she believes in Rick so much just like in Rick's dreams. He’s what she’s been believing in.

This was a greatly acted scene from Danai playing Michonne playing Dana playing the CRM. 🤭 Like I love that Michonne was sorta playing in the CRM's face a bit and it was just so clear the CRM does not stand a chance against this woman. She’s a mother on a mission. Nothing is stopping her. 👌🏽

So then we see Michonne walking around the CRM in a consignee jacket and I love that hers has a cinched waist. Michonne isn't letting that boxy jacket completely hide the Coca-Cola body. I’m here for it. 💅🏽

As Michonne walks around you can tell that, similar to Woodbury, she’s making note of quite a bit in this place - except this time she’s trying to blend in more like her husband told her. And the main thing Michonne clearly wants to know as she's walking around right now is - where is Rick Grimes.

She walks up some steps clearly trying to see where he could be, and even with all these CRM soldiers in helmets I know she’d be able to spot Rick if she saw him among them. And why? Because of that walk. 😏

But baby, she doesn’t have to spot him because of course the magnets in them have Rick spotting her first and making a beeline to her. I adore this walking moment. 🤩 I rewound it so much cuz I too love that man's walk lol.

gif cred: @riickgrimes

So Michonne is walking and then we see a soldier very intently making his way to her and I love the way it’s shot. Rick’s walk is iconic and so I love that that’s how you can immediately tell it’s him. And as we know, we’re not the only one who loves Rick’s walk because as he approaches Michonne and quietly takes her arm Michonne has this instant smitten smile upon recognizing his touch and walking alongside him. 😊

This scene made it clear that TOWL was gonna have a lot of fun with Richonne’s love and desire being at the foundation of the show. And you just know Rick was eagerly waiting for the moment he could get to her. He was a man on a mission. A mack-on-Michonne mission. 😌

And the moment as he takes her arm and silently guides her into a room is just hot, what can I say? 🔥

gif cred: @riickgrimes

I love seeing Rick take control and seeing Michonne try to be subtle but clearly look so excited to be back with him. 😊

Also, now y’all when would a soldier…especially this soldier, grab a consignee by her arm and guide her into a room alone lol? That alone likely would've raised suspicions around the CRM. But I'm glad they did it anyway cuz it was a joy to see Rick and Michonne walk side by side again. CRM, y’all don’t even know you now have the most lethal married couple in your midst walking arm and arm rn. 🤭

gif cred: @riickgrimes

Rick leads her into the room and gives one last look outside to make sure no one is headed their way. The way he looks around before going inside, you know he knows exactly what they're about to do.

So then we get a top-tier scene as Rick and Michonne walk into the garage?? Idk what that place was exactly so I’ll just call it a garage lol. 

Rick and Michonne walk into the garage and give each other a quick look before checking to make sure the coast is clear. Rick checks one side and Michonne checks the other and then y’all, Rick has a very clear mission and it’s not swapping information it’s swapping saliva lol. I promise you, dishing out information and making a plan was secondary on the agenda for Rick during this secret rendezvous. 😋

gif cred: @riickgrimes

Rick proceeds to put his helmet down and before Michonne can even confirm that she doesn’t see anybody on her side, Rick grabs her and they basically pounce on each other with kisses and it’s the best. 😊They both are starving for each other and this kiss made it clear.

gif cred: @riickgrimes

You can tell the moment Rick put that helmet down he was laser-focused on loving on Michonne. He basically said I’ll brief you on this mysterious advanced society that’s kept me from you for years if we have time in between the main priority of making out.

I adore the way he grabs her neck and then the way Michonne is always ready to match the energy as she wraps her arms around him. And y’all, how nice of them to have a kiss that is as pleasing to the ear as it is to the eye because they, and Rick especially, stayed moaning in these TOWL kisses. Love to see it/hear it. 😋

I always say Richonne’s kisses are a form of communication and their first wordless conversation in the CRM - or 'moanversation' if you will - had them both making it very clear to each other that they’re ecstatic to be back together.  

gif cred: @riickgrimes

And after almost 8 years apart, the intensity of this kiss makes perfect sense, and I love that they knew exactly how to communicate how hungry Richonne are for each other in every way. This kiss is A1. 👏🏽

Like the way they lean against the vehicle and Rick puts his arm up against the vehicle to be mindful of Michonne adds such a cute caring layer to this whole top-tier moment. And the way they’re swaying and wrapped up in each other, her knees buckling, his hands in her hair, the way he chased her lips at the end. Just yes to all of it. 👏🏽

gif cred: @ricksmarlene

I love how the kiss is so immensely passionate and then afterward they just have this moment of holding each other and breathing together. Seeing the way Michonne smiles after and touches his face, you can seriously see how safe she feels with Rick. Like she still knows so little about this place but she’s back in his arms so she knows somehow it’ll be okay. 🥲

And then y’all, we get the first signature Richonne forehead touch in TOWL as they break from the kiss and still stay wrapped in each other's arms. It's one of the classic Richonne things they do and I love the intimacy of it. 🥹

gif cred: @lousolversons

That kiss clearly left them breathless as Rick whispers, “They believed you.” And Michonne earnestly asks, “How do you know?” Rick says, “You’re here.” And the way he says that you can tell his elation comes not just from the fact that she passed the CRM vetting process but most of all that she’s really here with him after all this time.

And then because Rick is like this rendezvous is about making out first, information second - he goes right back to kissing Michonne and moaning as they pull each other in as close as possible. 😊

gif cred: @nat111love

Michonne reciprocates but then she notices something. And this is where the loss of Rick’s hand is mourned yet again by me because we all know the reason Michonne notices Rick’s missing hand is because she’s like normally this would be the part where I feel your hand on my backside but it hasn’t happened yet so, something must have happened.

After not feeling that signature palm on her behind, she stops to touch Rick’s prosthetic and I adore how Rick is still so in the moment of kissing her that he kisses her one more time as she turns to look at his arm. The man is voracious about his wife and I love it. 😊

gif cred: @nat111love

Michonne gently holds his prosthetic in her hand and looks at Rick with so much care and concern as she wonders what happened. I feel like this is the first time in years that anybody showed this level of care for what Rick went through and I love that she immediately wants to know what happened to her baby. You know if the CRM had cut his hand off themselves the beef she has with them would only intensify. In a way, the CRM did have a hand in Rick losing his hand so they gotta pay.

gif cred: @riickgrimes

Rick looks down at his prosthetic too and shares sadly but also with a certain resolve, “It happened a long time ago. One of the last times I tried to get home.”  I love that he says 'tried to get home' rather than just 'tried to get away.' It shows that in every way the CRM is not home - Michonne and their family still are home to him.

Also, it’s interesting how for Michonne this is devastating news but for Rick, this is old news and he’s just like what’s more important is making out rn. But Rick’s words catch Michonne’s attention as she repeats his words back and says, “One of the last times?”

This is Michonne’s first indicator that Rick might have stopped trying to get home. I think in her mind she thought surely Rick would have been still working on an escape but after fighting like hell to get home for years he had to stop trying - and not even because he wanted to give up but because he was made to feel that going home could get his wife and loved ones killed.

(Side note: I love that the bullet shell from Rick's gun is visible in Michonne’s hair in this scene. She really found every way possible to still be close to him 🥲) 

gif cred: @nat111love

Rick’s reaction to her asking this makes me emotional. 😢 He looks into her eyes as he too hears how his words sound and then he takes a deep breath. Breathing tells a very informative story throughout TOWL. And with this inhale from Rick you can just feel the weight of what he’s been through and now, finally having a moment to share some of it with Michonne, it’s probably difficult for him to even know where to begin.

gif cred: @nat111love

It’s hard because we as the audience got to see how hard he fought to get home but at this moment you know it's overwhelming to even know how to tell Michonne how hard this years-long separation and imprisonment has been on him. But he so badly wants Michonne to know that it wasn’t for a lack of trying or a lack of love that he stopped trying to get home.

He tells her, “They had me trapped.” And then the way my heart literally overflows with emotion when Rick so sincerely says, “They don’t have me anymore.” It’s so moving and beautiful to see Rick become the heart-eye emoji as he tells Michonne they don’t have him anymore. 🥲

There’s a clear second part of that sentence that’s not said aloud but rather in Rick's eyes - 'they don’t have me anymore...because I’m yours.'

gif cred: @riickgrimes

The way he looks at her with that teary-eyed smile, knowing he’s hers. 😭 It's touching and layered because he so sincerely wants to reassure Michonne of this, all while knowing that the damage they've done to him is pretty severe.

It’s also so powerful for him to say this because while their situation is still dire and in many ways, Michonne and us will learn the CRM does still have him more than he’d like, in this moment Rick genuinely wants to believe that he’s no longer chained to the CRM.

They don’t get to have him anymore, even if that’s what it still looks like on the outside, because the woman who makes him come alive, the brightest light in his world, is back with him. That alone makes him feel like he is no longer stuck with the CRM.

Rick knows his heart will always belong to her and that was communicated in this sweet line and his loving eyes and smile at her after he says it. 

Rick then says with certainty, “We will get away. Together” because right now he does believe that Richonne can do anything. He’s tried to get away for years but having Michonne here now makes all the difference.

gif cred: @nat111love

And I love the eye contact as he looks at her with so much love and smiles, feeling so right being back with her. Like just looking at her gives him strength. At the same time, it moves me how much you can see in his eyes that he's eager to be the determined and strong man Michonne once knew, despite feeling dead and broken after what he endured the last seven or so years.

gif cred: @nat111love

Michonne of course believes and is comforted by Rick’s words that they’ll get away together as she smiles and nods. Again she trusts him more than anybody in the world. 

gif cred: @nat111love

Also, I love how Rick’s reunion with Michonne as his wife is one where without even having to address it they both just know they’ve waited for each other. They know they’re still the one to each other. As we know, after just a few months Rick reunited with Lori and she was already pregnant with his best friend's baby. So it’s beautiful to see Rick now reunite with his wife Michonne after years and know that she really has only wanted him all these years. And if anything her big reveal will be that she was pregnant with his baby. 🥲

But while that's understandably not revealed in this scene, there's still some more great mom and dad content when Rick again wants to confirm his baby girl is okay.

He asks, “They're okay? She's okay?” I love him asking that and the way he asks, nodding and looking right into Michonne's eyes. Again it’s so vulnerable and caring. A true father. You know making sure his loved ones are good is so important to him.

gif cred: @bizarre-hostile

And “they’re okay” means team family which is sweet that he wants to know they're okay. I liked hearing "they're okay?" too because while Rick doesn't know it, he does in fact have more than one kid out there and it almost felt like without even knowing it he’s asking if both his kids are okay.

Michonne answers with a smile and says, “Yes. She’s okay.” She has this smile that’s so specific to when she’s thinking about her kids and it’s precious. 🥲

gif cred: @riickgrimes

Michonne continues, wanting to finally tell Rick all about how amazing their daughter has turned out as she goes, “She’s…” but then she stops herself and you just know the image of a certain Little Brave Man has popped into her head. 😭

And it’s a moment that hits my heart as you see Michonne feel both joy and sadness. Because she misses RJ too and because she knows Rick is going to be filled with layered emotions the second he learns of him.

Since the moment she found out she was pregnant you know Michonne longed to be able to share with Rick that they had a baby. Rick can tell she has something big to say too as he asks, “What is it?”

gif cred: @riickgrimes

I noted in this scene you can really tell that Rick can sense that Michonne has something major to tell him and he knows it’s about their immediate family but he doesn’t know what it is which is why he keeps thinking it might have to do with Judith being okay. Like you can see sometimes he searches her eyes trying to figure it out because whatever the news is he can feel it’s about their kid. And he’s right. It's just about the kid he doesn't know of yet.

And you can also see the thoughts running through Michonne’s head as she and Rick stay in each other's arms between these vehicles. She longs to tell him about RJ but knows this isn’t the right time yet. And as always, she’s right. I heard there were some viewers upset and thinking she made the wrong choice by not telling Rick right here and now and that was wild to me.

This is Richonne’s first time getting to even have an extended conversation and even then it can’t be that long because they can’t risk being caught. And major life-changing news that you have a son that you had no clue about and have missed all of his life thus far is not the kind of thing to drop on someone when there won’t even be time to elaborate and ask questions and just process the news together.

I fully support Michonne choosing to wait and it’s actually such an act of kindness to Rick because she knows that news is going to shock him and be very bittersweet and just a lot to take in and she ideally wants to tell him when they can more freely talk.

Like after holding their child in her womb alone she basically chooses to now hold the news of their son alone just a bit more for Rick’s well-being.

Rather than just drop it on him and have him carry that news on top of carrying the task of getting them home, she shows discipline and restraint and lovingly smiles as she tells him, “When we get away.” (Also I always just love thinking that when Michonne looks at Rick here she’s seeing all of RJ’s little traits he got from his dad. 🥰)

gif cred: @riickgrimes

I adore the way Rick says, “No. She’s okay?” He’s such a concerned dad and again he knows, because of his and Michonne’s interconnectedness, that there’s something more she has to say about their immediate family. I just love that he’s like I can’t wait until we get away to know for certain our baby girl is okay. But Rick, little do you know the news is actually about your beautiful baby boy.

Also, the fact that Rick is so not okay after everything he’s been through all these years but his main care is that Judith is okay 🥲. Warms my heart.

And then the way Michonne responds, it’s my favorite thing ever. 🥹She says the absolute perfect thing as she assuredly tells him, “She’s us, Rick.”

gif cred: @riickgrimes

Y’all. 😭 It’s the perfect response and so true. Judith really is a little Richonne baby. 🥹

It’s so beautiful for Michonne to tell Rick that their daughter is just like her mom and her dad. Rick gets to know not only is their baby alive and okay but she has qualities like him even despite his absence and she’s also like the love of his life which you know would make him happy to see Judith turn out like Michonne.

I love that Michonne looks at Judith and sees her and Rick. 🥹 And that they’re an 'us' like that. And also I love the way Michonne has her hand in Rick’s hair as she comforts him with this confirmation that their baby girl is bound to be okay because she’s just like her resilient parents.

Michonne calmly says, “The rest when we get away” and hearing Judith is them is enough for Rick to feel a bit less anxious and agree to wait for the rest of the family updates. 

gif cred: @riickgrimes

He nods and then remembers this is probably also a good time to get their next steps in order.

Rick tells Michonne if he passes her a note somehow she has to read it and destroy it. Michonne looks into Rick’s eyes because she has to address some things about this shady CRM as she tells him, “They killed people, Rick. Dozens of people.” I know Michonne is like my friends died and I almost died from these people so wth is this place? (Also I love how often she says Rick’s name since they've reunited.)

gif cred: @coolpartytimefan

As Rick mesmerizingly stares into her soul (and i'm not even exaggerating about that lol) Michonne says, “They’re killing people out there. Have you had to…?” And before she can finish the question, Rick is quick to want to make it clear that he means it when he says he’s not with them as he says, “No. No. The ones in red. They go out sometimes. They come back covered in blood.”

He looks at her toward the tail end of that statement but it’s interesting how for the most part he looks down when talking about the CRM, again almost like there’s this sense of shame and fear surrounding them.

He says, “Most of us don’t know what they do. I didn’t know.” Rick looks into Michonne's eyes as he admits to not knowing about the CRM's mass killings and then he vulnerably says, “But I knew. I was stuck here.” That’s the one thing the CRM made very clear to him. 

Seeing the toll the CRM has taken on her friends and now her husband, Michonne knows the CRM needs to be taught a lesson and brought down so she, as determined as ever, asks Rick, “Could we stop them?”

And y’all I absolutely adore Rick’s response to her. 😍 The way a big smile spreads across his face as he gets to see Michonne is still the woman he knows and loves who won’t take anything lying down. She's still her. Again, you just see him have so much love for the part of her that’s a fighter. Like the way Rick just has to swoon for a second over his wife's determination is the sweetest thing. 😊

But then Rick collects himself, knowing taking on the CRM is too risky as he definitively answers, “No.” Michonne takes a moment to look at Rick, surprised and searching for the man who was always willing to fight the fight with her before. Then she asks, “Could we try?” 

Rick is quiet for a moment, not wanting to have to just turn her down about this, but he knows a thing or two about how hard you can try against the CRM and they still come out on top. So he softly says, “We’d never get back.” Getting home with Michonne is the ultimate priority for him.

And then in the first of many times Rick will gift Michonne in TOWL, he reaches into his pocket and gives Michonne Nat’s signature lighter that his stepparent Danger gave him. 🥹

Once again Rick wins Husband of the Year because how sweet is his good kind heart that he saw the lighter in the woods and pocketed it knowing it would mean something to Michonne to have something of her late friend. He’s the best. 🥰 And I love the way he gently lifts up her hand with his prosthetic to give her the lighter and the way their hands linger in each other as she takes it. Every time they touch it's clear they're magnets. 🧲

Rick so sweet and sincere says, “I’m sorry about your friend.” Like truly, anything and anyone that means something to Michonne means something to Rick because he loves her so much - even the guy who nearly killed Rick by shooting down his helicopter.

Michonne, never one to forget her loved ones' memory, says, “He should’ve lived. They all should’ve lived.” But then she takes a quiet moment and confidently looks right into Rick’s eyes as she says, “I’m here now. We’re in here together now. And we’re gonna get home.”

gif cred: @ddesole

I love how Rick and Michonne both want to fervently reassure each other of this - that they’re in this together and they’re going to achieve their goal of getting home because they’re here as a unit now. Having each other back makes them know they can do anything…at least for now. 

And then Rick is ready to go back to the activity that was always at the top of his agenda for this secret rendezvous because he’s like 'Michonne, you can’t be a hotly determined A like that and think these magnets aren’t going to kick in to overdrive and have me eating your face again lol.' #DirectQuote 😋

So Rick of course leans in to kiss her again and Michonne looks like she might’ve thought they were going to continue the conversation but then of course it takes less than a second for her to reciprocate the energy and start passionately kissing him back.

gif cred: @hikarielizabethbloom

I really adore that closing kiss. These kisses stay feeling like they’re trying to inhale each other and physically morph into one being. and then I especially adore the way they embrace after it, just overcome with the amount of love they pour out to each other. It’s so sweet seeing them nestled into each other. 🥰 Every physical Richonne action, from the kisses, the forehead touches, the embraces, and more is so 'spine-tinglingly' intimate.

As Rick leans against her, you can see that he does feel a bit overwhelmed and unsure of how he’s gonna get them out of here. But being wrapped in her arms now he’s at least given the strength and the calm to know somehow they’ll find a way.

And as Michonne holds him close, she looks like so long as she has him, she’ll face whatever else may come her way in this giant mysterious place. It really does feel like she's transferring this much-needed uplifting energy and reassurance to him as they stay in this embrace.

The way Richonne gives each other life gives me life. And this scene makes me so happy like it’s oozing serotonin.

Richonne is in for quite a roller coaster after they leave this moment in the garage so I appreciate this scene - their first extended conversation in years - for giving them a time when they're on the same page.

With this scene, they got to show that their chemistry is still as fiery as ever and they’re still such a well-oiled machine as parents and partners. Whenever Rick and Michonne are in each other's arms they’re in the safest place they could be.

But while they’re the ultimate safety to each other, to the CRM...Richonne is most definitely the danger. 😌👌🏽

[damn-stark]

Chapter 4 Snow on the beach

Chapter 4 of Moonlight

A/N- last full Cregan chapter, now onto Aemond, let’s see if he can beat Lord Stark

Warning- Swearing, ANGST, FLUFF!, Talks of blood and death, suggestive nfsw, LONG CHAPTER.

Pairing- Cregan Stark x Velaryon!fem-reader, Aemond Targaryen x Velaryon!fem-reader

Episode- Before 1x08

(If you want to be tagged let me know)

————

*127 AC*

“…we’re hoping for a girl, so if the gods are generous you will have that sister you always wanted, wouldn’t that be great?

Daemon also hopes for the babe to be a girl. He said maybe you could choose a name, would you like that? I think it’s a marvelous idea, please write your ideas.”

A girl? Your mother is hoping for a girl again?

Maybe it’s because you’re far away from her and you haven't seen her in four years, but the idea of her having another daughter besides you makes you feel bitter with jealousy.

Is that cruel to feel?

“Anyway, I’m glad you have made friends with Lady Arra, I hate the thought of you being alone so far away. Tell me is she kind? It’s okay to admit if she’s rude and a bitch—”

You snicker softly at your mother's words regardless of your previous feelings.

“—it’ll stay between us. But if you don’t feel comfortable telling your mother then tell your cousins or your brothers. They won’t tell, trust me, Jacaerys never wants to show me what you write to each other now, but, it makes me glad that you share a bond regardless of distance. I know he misses you as I do, my Sweet.

I love you so much.

Love always, your mother, Rhaenyra.”

You put the letter down on the desk and simply smile softly. You don’t cry anymore when you read her letters.

The first two years that's all you could do, cry as you read what your mother, grandmother, brothers, and even what your cousins wrote. You just longed to be by their side again, you missed them terribly. But when your rendezvous with Cregan changed to secret forbidden romantic nights, you stopped crying at night and when you read the letters from home.

Now albeit you feel like starting crying again. Is it stupid to feel jealous about her having another daughter? Is it foolish to feel like you’ll be replaced?

You’re so far away, and you’ll always be far away because of your marriage to Aemond, so having another daughter will cure that longing to have you with her. Having another daughter also means she’ll replace you because it’s a daughter shared with the man she’s in love with, not someone she married out of political gain, not someone who had different preferences. She’ll be the apple of your mother's eye, of their eye—

No! No, it’s stupid, you’re being stupid. Your mother loves you, she’ll never do such a terrible thing.

Albeit…before, when she was with Ser Harwin hoping for another girl you didn't fill you with jealousy then because at least you had your father; he wasn’t always available, but he was there, he loved you too. He’s gone now though, so if she does replace you you’ll have no one.

——

*4 FEW YEARS BACK*

“All right, now…” he trails off and glances around the ship, you follow his line of gaze to see what he’d point to, but he then turns around and points at something else completely. “…that. What do we call that and what’s its use?”

You squint your eyes on the large spar that extends forward from the ship's vessel prow and think back to what he and Ser Qarl have taught you whilst on your way to Dragonstone.

Out of all the things you’ve learned, it takes time to come up with the answer right away, but it then comes to mind. “It’s the bowsprit!” You clap with excitement. “And it prevents the ship from…uh, being submerged in water when the waters are rough!”

“Yes!” Your father exclaims. “Yes! Good job.”

You skip forward and then speak to Ser Qarl. “I’ve thought of a scenario, all right, Ser Qarl.”

Said man leans his arm against a barrel and scoffs in amusement before he softly throws his chin up to gesture you to share what he asked of you a while ago. Something you thought of with a lot of precaution.

“I’m on deck, and then whoa, I get attacked,” you tell him as you clasp your hands back and walk towards the quarter-deck. “Pirates are coming on the ship, my crew is getting hurt, so then I run forward, use my blade to cut the main yard, and swing across the deck to save them, and myself.” You finish proudly and spin around to face both men with a smile. “Huh? Is that good?”

Ser Qarl and your father share a glance and break into a chuckle, making your smile falter. They think it’s stupid, don’t they?

You knew it! It’s too dramatic and childish.

“That’s…” your father clears his throat and walks over to you to wrap his arm around your shoulders. “That’s a great plan, darling, well thought out.”

You look up at him with uncertainty and probe. “Really?”

He shoots you a grin and nods. “Yes, really.”

“You’ll make a fine sailor,” Ser Qarl compliments. “Probably one better than your father.”

You're quick to please so once again you can’t help but bring back your smile to your features.

“Yes,” your father agrees. “You will. You’ll make a legendary sailor.”

——

*NOW*

“See! That’s how you do it!” Cregan exclaims and flashes a smile as he admires how the arrow impales exactly at the center of the makeshift target. “Let’s see you best that.”

What if he wants to replace you, Prince Daemon?

He has daughters, but those are his own, what if for some reason he just wants to replace you?

Cregan calls your name, but you don't answer or look his way. Instead, you stay lost in your mind and think that it’s unbelievable that your mother would want to replace you. She loves you, all of you, in fact, she was often advised that she not be so affectionate towards any of you, especially towards your brothers, so she wouldn’t just replace you.

No?

Cregan calls for you again and this time touches your shoulder, snapping you from your messy thoughts raveld in your brain.

“Yes?” You query and meet his curious grey eyes.

Cregan blinks and then points at the target with his eyes. “It’s your turn darling,” he says and quickly looks back at you to study you.

Albeit before he catches anything, you pick up your bow and an arrow to then go stand where Cregan was. You exhale softly to try and forget what you were thinking of while you shift your feet and lift your arms. You get the arrow in position and get ready to shoot it, but hands then fall on your arms, making your breath catch and your gaze drift to the corner of your eyes to look at Cregan behind you.

“Relax your bow arm,” he advises softly as he holds your gaze the entire time.

You can’t help but smile and stare at his lips.

“You did hear me?” He asks.

You relax your bow arm like he said and nod.

“Just making sure. You’re not looking at me in the eyes,” he teases.

You laugh softly and slowly meet his gaze with a playful smirk. He snickers and then steals a quick peck from your lips before he stands back.

You flash him a giddy grin before you look back at the makeshift target and draw out a soft exhale again before letting the arrow fly.

Albeit the arrow whizzes past the target clung onto a thin tree.

“I see,” Cregan stifles his laugh and crosses his arms over his chest. “That was terrible.”

You sigh and lower your arm to stand back without meeting his gaze—your mind is just too lost.

“Your teacher must not be so good, you missed the target. You’re usually good,” he continues to tease.

You drop your arms and huff. “The tree is too thin,” you throw out the first complaint that comes to mind.

“The target isn’t the problem,” Cregan points out honestly. “When we go hunting the prey is moving. At battle, the target is moving as well. This. this is easy.”

“I won’t use a bow and arrow,” you remark and briefly meet his gaze. “I’ll have a sword in battle, and Astraea.”

Since you glance up as if you could see Astraea overhead you miss the way Cregan watches you and sees right through your troubled mind right away.

“The target isn’t the problem,” he repeats and leans his equipment against the tree behind him to approach you. “What’s wrong? What troubles you?” He asks softly and takes the stuff from your hands to put it by his.

You know you’ll sound like a total whiner, a spoiled brat most likely. He’s more humble than most of the people at Kings Landing, so he probably won’t agree, but all these thoughts are overflowing your mind and they’re beginning to drown you, you can’t hold back anymore. Besides he is your best friend, and your…paramour? Partner?

No that sounds too official, you aren’t. Paramour sounds right—he’s your secret paramour. He should know what troubles you.

“It’s,” you begin to share and sigh deeply. “It’s my mother. She’s with child again.”

He hums and just like you predicted he responds nicely which contradicts your frown and gleaming eyes. “That’s great news, I’m happy for you….” He trails off as he notices your reaction and backtracks. “Is it not great news?”

You mindlessly grab the pendant your grandmother had given you and mutter. “They’re hoping for a girl, again. Aegon came out as a boy so they’re hoping for a girl this time…to replace me.”

Cregan sighs and shakes his head as he looks at you as if you’re mad. “What? Darling, why would you think that?”

Tears fall out of your eyes as you’re overwhelmed with sorrow you can’t surpass. “Because,” your voice quivers. You can’t even look at Cregan in the eyes or else you’ll just feel a worse anguish in your heart. “Unlike Aegon and this new baby, they’ll have soon, I wasn’t made out of love. My parents had a duty to commit, not Prince Daemon and my mother. They love each other, their kids are made out of love. She wants to replace me with a daughter she wasn’t forced to have. A different daughter that…” you trail off and shake your head whilst you wipe the tears that manage to break out. “…that’s not like me.”

Cregan sighs softly and closes the gap between the two of you with an embrace. “Oh my darling girl,” he says as he begins to caress your back. “That’s the most maddest thing I’ve heard.”

Now that you’re in his embrace, as his comforting smell filters into your nose you can no longer hold back your tears, you cry softly as you hug him.

“I may not know your mother, but from what you’ve told me, it seems she loves you,” he assures you. “She’d never replace you. Never. Who would replace a woman like you?” He asks and pulls back to cup your cheeks. “It’s like if you had a daughter already, wouldn't you want another if the gods were generous enough?”

Well, when he puts it that way.

“I suppose I would,” you whisper.

Cregan offers you a faint smile and nods. “See? You just miss your mother, that’s all. Besides you’re her eldest, you’re special to her, you always will be no matter who comes along.” He assures you while he wipes your tears away before he leans in and presses a gentle kiss on your lips and on your forehead.

“You’ll always be my favorite girl regardless.” he finishes saying to lift your spirits.

And you can't help it, you slowly begin to smile before you steal a lingering kiss that he takes over and deepens. When you pull back you lean your forehead against his and wipe his lips with your thumb.

“Thank you, Cregan,” you whisper with your heart beginning to race as words just run up your throat. “I don’t know how I’d survive being so far away without you.”

The corner of his lips tug to a soft smile. “I’m the one that should be thankful,” he whispers against your lips. “The gods put you in my life and saved me from this loneliness I was bestowed with.”

Your entire face burns and you can’t help but flash him a blissful beaming grin before slamming your lips against his. Right away Cregan slides his hands to the sides of your head and begins to push you back against the tree, whilst your hands travel to the back of his neck, and your nails dig into his skin.

Driven by passion Cregan then begins to slide his hands down, letting them linger on your breasts before he tears open the top part of your dress, making you gasp. Yet your disbelief is short-lived because you then give in and unbuckle his shirt.

Albeit, soon thereafter he forces himself away and lets his head hang low as if suddenly troubled. You try to ease his stress by grabbing his face and reaching for more but he stops you. “Who would I be if I made you mine?” He mumbles between pants. “I can’t.”

Your smile softens as you're quick to reassure him. “You won’t dishonor yourself or me because I love you.”

Cregan holds your gaze in disbelief but can’t help his smile from spreading on his face. “We said we wouldn't fall in love.” He reminds you of your ultimatum.

You sigh. “I couldn’t resist myself, not when you’re the very breath in my lungs. Without you, I can’t breathe.”

It might be foolish to say, no it is stupid since you won’t marry, but it’s a truth you can’t hide. Not from him, not when he’s driven you too madly in love. And especially not when he grins so tenderly for you.

“If that’s so then I can finally relieve myself of this weight I’ve been carrying for too long and say that I love you too,” he confesses with a sense of relief as if he had been forced to hold it all back.

And you knew it’s a bad idea, you told yourself you wouldn’t give in to such passionate temptations, but you’re a woman pushed away from the mother who could teach her the reality, you remember her loving passionately and freely and you can’t help but live by those terms and smile at the man before you before you feed your forbidden passion by stealing a kiss.

“Give me the privilege of giving me your maidenhead then,” he whispers against your lips and steals the very breath from your lungs—“give me the privilege of being mine. Only mine.”

You meet his gaze and never think about Aemond, he doesn’t cross your mind when you’re with Cregan. He should be the very thing that stops you, but he's left you alone, so neither you nor Cregan think of the consequences of what could happen, you’re too driven by lust, passion, and by love.

“As long as you are mine,” you whisper impatiently as you pull his shirt off.

Cregan smirks and nods. “From this day until the end of my days,” he whispers happily against your lips as he holds your gaze and nothing else.

——

*A FEW MONTHS LATER*

“You know when I was a little girl I used to be scared of the North,” you tell Cregan while you admire a flame dancing on a candle on your end table.

“Why’s that?” He asks with some amusement playing in his tone.

You snicker and peer back at him with a smirk. “The servants' children said that giant spiders roamed the snowy lands and that northern men were big, brutish, and stole women from the homes of their husbands.”

Cregan pulls his hand away from your bare hip and you can practically hear those dark eyebrows furrow while those pink pouted lips only crease to a frown.

When you churn your head you’re proven right when you see him looking at you with a pointed look. “They say that?” He presses as if those people had personally offended him.

Your smirks turns to a teasing smile and you nod. “A lot of people like to make up reality when they don’t know it.”

Cregan grumbles and turns to lie on his back and look at the canopy overhead. You ache for more of his gentle but rough fingers so you turn and tangle your legs with his while you place your hand on his chest.

“Did you ever imagine you’d love a brutish man?” Cregan asks and almost sounds deeply serious.

You snicker and tease him. “Do I? Or did this man take me from my quarters and make me his?”

Cregan blinks and turns his head down with a smile he can’t help but flash at you. “Maybe it’s you who has cast a spell on me. I heard that the Valyrians were blood sorcerers.”

You giggle and sigh longingly. “I wish I could do such a thing, but the practice is forbidden and lost in your family, unfortunately. My natural beauty is the only thing that took you under a spell.”

Cregan blesses your ears with a hearty chuckle before he flips swiftly and captures you under him. You bite your cheeks to not yelp out of excitement and alert a servant or a guard.

“That is indeed true,” he flatters you and leans down to capture your lips in his. “You have a bewitching beauty.”

You grin and hook your arms around his neck to keep him close. “Oh, I like that.” You coo. “It makes me sound frightening.”

He hums and averts his gaze before interjecting. “No not bewitching then. Enchanting.”

Your smile softens and you can’t help but look at him softly as if he had just made you fall in love with his words alone.

“Tell me,” he continues to fill the comforting silence. “What else did you think of when you were young? More fake stories about northern men?”

You chuckle softly and shake your head. “Well,” you part your lips and sigh deeply as you think back to several years worth of thoughts, casting a long silence.

Cregan doesn’t mind the silence though, he liked to watch you in the silence like an admirer watches art they find fascinating; he never could get enough of the beauty before him. He even liked to admire you while you parted your lips.

“Without getting too depressing—”

Yet you don’t get to finish because the door handle suddenly clicks before the door bursts open, leaving you no time to attempt to hide, only leaving a second for Cregan to flip himself off you.

Nevertheless, the intruder happens to be Arra, Cregan’s wife, and your closest friend.

It turns out that Arra didn’t turn out to be the concern you worried she’d be, unexpectedly she turned out to be a good friend even if you do love her husband. Sure it took time to become friends mostly because you pushed away the possibility out of your fear that she hated you, but she doesn’t.

It also turns out that her preferences are different, she enjoys the company of women, mainly that of her handmaiden. She just put on an act that day Cregan became Lord to fool the masses. Which is a relief, you probably wouldn't be able to handle the guilt if she actually loved him.

“Arra,” Cregan hisses and pulls the furs over you to cover up your bare chest.

“Forgive me,” she mutters as she quickly closes the door behind her before she waltzs in and throws herself next to you on the bed. “I grew bored listening to all the maester had to tell me so I pretended I needed to talk to my husband.”

One would think you would be appalled that she’s lying next to Cregan and you with nothing on but the furs keeping you warm, but, well in your time together, as you’ve grown closer it’s just something you do and don’t question. For one, Arra says she finds no romantic interest in Cregan, and he’s her husband under the old gods, secondly, she jokes that she’s basically married to you too because of how much Cregan loves you, so it’s just like partners being in bed with one another; arra says.

As for Cregan and you, well, you’ve grown accustomed to it, and to keep up appearances you’ve chosen to find a taste for it.

“It’s one of the dreading days isn’t it?” You query Arra knowingly. “That’s why I pretend Astraea needs tending to. They don’t bother me when I say I’m with her.”

Arra rolls her eyes and Cregan frowns at the canopy—“I really detest that I have to suffer through the Maesters dreadful lectures without you. You’re my ward, you're meant to suffer with me.”

You snicker. “I suffered through enough of them with the previous Lady, and I will have to suffer through worse lectures in Kings Landing, I’m taking advantage of your kindness.”

Arra snaps her head to you, and you meet her gaze and you both break into laughter.

“You know we were in a conversation,” Cregan cuts in quite annoyed that your precious moments were so rudely interrupted.

You don’t mind Arra barging and find it as an excuse to see Cregan later so you drag her in your conversation. “He asked me what I would think about when I was young.”

Arra hums curiously and fixes herself to get comfortable, much to Cregan’s protest.

“Well,” you finally share your long-awaited response. “When my head wasn't literally in the clouds or fantasizing about my desires, I would often think about my future. Who I would marry, where I would go, what would happen to me, and who I wanted to be.”

A silence lingers where both Arra and Cregan think about what you said and why someone young would have to think about something so serious so early on. They both grew curious about who it is you wanted to be before a future was chosen for you, but Cregan beats Arra to the question.

“Who is that you wanted to be?”

You sigh dreamily and rest your head on his shoulder first before you tell the tale you were forced to leave behind along with your childhood. “Besides wanting to be a sailor, or an explorer, or a singer, I wanted to be Queen, a kind one like great, great grandmother Queen Alyssane, and my ancestor Queen Rhaenys.”

“Queen?” Arra probes between a joke and a serious demeanor.

You nod softly. “I was the eldest, I thought it was my right, but well…” you trail off and leave it untouched because they know why your dreams weren’t granted. Albeit you do defend yourself. “Not that I resent my brother, I never have, I kept dreaming after that dream was crushed.” You smile softly and that assures Cregan that he can poke at you now.

“What is it you wanted after that? To be a pirate? Isn’t that something you asked to be?”

You laugh and nod against his chest, letting him wrap his arm around your head to press you against him. “Yes well, besides that I dreamt of things I could never be, things I no longer crave because…my feet around on the ground now, and because when I think about tomorrow I see the people I love beside me.”

Another silence follows and this time it’s not so tense, it’s comforting and full of sweet bliss. Arra breaks it and what she shares doesn’t bring tension. “I was in crisis when I was young because I learned I fancied women, and then I hated the fact that I would have to marry a man.”

“I wanted to meet a giant that I thought lived far north,” Cregan shares and right away Arra and you share a knowing look because compared to Arra and you, that was such a sweet and weightless response. He doesn’t seem to understand what his response meant though, so when Arra and you start laughing he’s just left puzzled.

“What is it? I’m being serious, aren’t you?”

——

*128 AC*

Screams fill the room while the sour metallic smell of blood begins to filter the room.

“Come on my Lady push! The babe is almost out!” The midwife instructs Arra.

Albeit Arra throws her head back and shakes her head. “I can’t,” she cries out shakily. “I can’t! It hurts! Please don’t make me go on, please,” she begs with streams of tears mixing with the thick beads of sweat that bathe her face.

“Arra,” you mumble and lean over to grab her jaw and tilt her head to the side so she can meet your gaze. “Arra, I know it hurts, I know, but you have to keep going for your babe. If you don’t then they’ll die,” you share the harsh truth so she can get inspired. “The pain is almost over. I promise.”

Seeing and hearing her in pain is something you don’t want to witness, you know the possibility of her outcome and it frightens you; not for selfish reasons, but rather because she’s your friend, your best friend and you know how cruel childbirth can be and she doesn’t deserve to suffer.

You want to be back to when it was just Cregan, you, and her, simple and serene times. Days when you’d sit under the old weirwood tree with her, and her lady paramour, Genevieve, and sing a sweet song to the babe still growing in her belly.

“Something,” she stammers as she holds your gaze. “Something feels wrong.”

You look up to meet the gaze of her handmaiden and lover and mirror a concerned look before you look at the abnormal amount of blood that is pooling around her.

“We won’t let anything bad happen to you,” Genevieve assures her even if you’re both starting to know the cruel truth.

“Promise,” she continues to say in a way that doesn’t involve the others but doesn’t give away that her words are coming solely from her own aching heart.

“Push, my Lady, push!” They instruct again, and she listens, she puts as much effort as she can into delivering the babe that Cregan and her managed to make. However, she loses too much blood as the babe struggles to come out of her.

Arra doesn't even get to meet her son, she took her last breath as he cried for the first time, and your own heart wept at the realization.

But how does that compare to when you tell Cregan?

He didn’t love her, it’s true, but he did care for her. She was his best friend since childhood, a close confidant, and his wife. He’ll be so heartbroken and you dread seeing more of his sorrow, he was already so distressed when she began to bleed more than normal. He had to leave the room at that moment—Which in turn becomes an issue though because now no one can find him.

Albeit, you know where he is. It’s obvious too. It’s the only place he can think of going to at such a desperate moment. The Godswood.

“Cregan,” you call out as you see him sitting on a tree trunk by the red-leafed Heart tree.

Said man looks up with gleaming eyes. You don't hesitate to approach him and crouch down in front of him. “It’s a boy,” you share with a faint smile but with melancholy, he doesn't miss but ignores, Cregan actually smiles at the ground and murmurs.

“Rickon.”

You take his hands in yours and lose your smile as the dread of sharing the news begins to choke you, threatening you not to speak. Albeit he looks up at you and sees right through you again; he sees the tears stains on your cheeks, and the new tears that begin to form, and he knows he can no longer ignore the truth.

“No,” he mutters and shakes his head. “No, it cannot be true.”

You sniffle. “I’m sorry,” you whisper.

Cregan drops his head to hide his sorrow from you. After all these years he still hides his anguish, but now he doesn’t put on a brave face and then hides away in his chambers, now he lets you see his vulnerability. He lets you comfort him.

“I’m sorry,” you repeat and begin to caress his back. “I’m sorry.”

Cregan drops his head on your shoulder, letting you slide your hands around his neck so you can gently caress him and accompany him in his grief. You wish you could stay like that for a while longer, but you can't be caught being so affectionate so when the others found him you could go on pretending.

You learned to get better at pretending. In the first year of your secret relationship, you were almost caught doing things friends shouldn't do too many times, luckily it didn’t happen and a scandal didn’t spread…all because of Arra, she offered her aide then, she taught you how to be very discreet. Well, you were sneaky before, but you would get caught before, and because of her you didn’t and won’t. She helped you a lot and now she's gone with nothing left to her but her bones, and baby Rickon.

However, how can a child stop your departure? You had made the excuse when the five years were up that you wanted to wait for Arra to give birth, and the Queen granted it, but now?

Now Arra’s gone and the babe is here, meaning you will leave soon. You’ll leave Cregan...

That's what hurts too, knowing that with Arra’s death, your time here has also come to an end. You’ll have to leave and face…Aemond.

Seven hells.

You exhale deeply and fall on your bed now that you are in your semi-sheer white nightgown. All the walls that surround you that you once thought dull and bland, and the ceiling above you that you hated looking at when you first got here will soon change for you. This freedom you have here will soon change to a never-ending pester. And the people are somewhat nice, they're certainly a lot nicer now than they were the first year, they’re not racist anymore, but soon you’ll be surrounded by creeps like…Aegon.

Albeit creeps like him exist even here at Winterfell so that won’t change that much—The silence at night though, that will change and you’ll miss it too…

“Damn,” you grumble. “Maybe they should catch us together. It’ll be a bit of a scandal, but what of it?” You groan and sit up to push yourself off the end of your bed and walk to your balcony.

Perhaps the coldness is the one thing you won’t miss, but the silence? The tranquility? Cregan? You will miss him the most…

You sigh deeply again and fold your arms over the railing to rest your chin on your hands as you admire the empty street below. You let the silence linger for a moment before you begin to laugh quietly to yourself.

Once upon a time when you lived in Kings Landing, you’d look down at the streets below just past your window, and you'd see the calamity of everyday life and wish to be amongst it, now you’ve found peace here and wish to stay here in this castle amongst the tranquility. Have you grown, or have you forced yourself to make peace with your life?

You don’t know, so you sigh again and turn your head to the side, in that moment catching the rare blue winter rose in the corner of your railing.

A smile spreads on your lips and you rush over to pick it up, finding a small scroll around the stem. When you open it you see a small sentence; “meet me in my quarters.”

That’s bold of him, but you don’t argue, you’ve found ways to sneak to him. You use the same methods now with no hesitation and find yourself in his quarters, but find him looking out his own balcony. When you make sure no one is approaching you break your silence.

“Cregan?” You call out carefully, finding his still behavior odd.

Said man turns and you quickly add on. “Are you all right?”

The corner of his lips twitch to a slight smile. “Rickon is the most precious thing ever.” He begins to walk to you, and you don’t fail to head towards him as well—“You have to meet him.”

You smile. “I have. Albeit our meeting was cut short. He looks like you though.”

“You think?” He asks softly.

You nod as you meet right in the middle of his room. He takes no time to be sweet and grab your hands to wrap them with his warm ones.

“Baby Rickon makes me think of…our own children.” He makes your heart skip a beat before it begins to race. His words are absurd, you can’t be man and wife, but hearing him say those words makes it seem like a possibility.

“Hair white as snow, kind eyes like yours,” he says and cups your cheek. “Mighty children born of ice and fire.”

You can’t help but let your smile widen, and lose your mind in the impossible for a moment. You come down from that dream and face a truth he doesn’t want to see. However, instead of breaking his delusions, you let him dream because of his grief.

“How are you doing Cregan?” You ask and avoid the topic. “Be honest.”

Said man averts his gaze and lets your hands fall before he then wanders to the side of his bed to take a seat. “I,” he interjects but pauses and drops his head.

Now that racing heart you felt slows down and sinks as you see the anguish he was trying not to show. You approach him and sink down beside him on his bed.

“I feel as if I could have done more,” he reveals and looks up to meet your gaze, letting you see the tears that gleam over his eyes. “I know I didn’t love her as I possibly should have, but she was still my friend, and she died and I couldn’t stop it.”

You shake your head and press your hand on the side of his neck to caress him gently. “It wasn’t your fault,” you comfort him. “You did not do this. What happened to Arra unfortunately is normal. There was no preventing it. It was simply the Gods will. I’m sorry.”

Cregan swallows thickly and drifts his gaze away again, letting you press his head against your chest to be able to embrace him and keep him close to your heart.

“Now what you can do to honor her memory is be Rickon’s father,” you add quietly. “He’ll need you, Cregan.”

Cregan pulls away and faces you with tears rolling down his cheeks. “I don’t know how to be a father.”

“Who is?” You counter softly. “We don’t spend our lives training to be parents. You’ll struggle, everyone does, but you’ll know one step at a time as life moves on. Be the father yours was to you,” you try to assure him as you cup his jaw.

Cregan holds your gaze for a lingering minute, his lips part and his gaze softens. He doesn’t say anything for a moment that seems to go on for eternity, but then, just as you were growing insecure about what you said, he smiles before he steals a kiss from you.

“See,” he breaks his silence and grabs your cheeks. “This is why I love you. This is why you’d make a great Lady of Winterfell. Your kindness can melt the coldness that surrounds this land.”

You scoff softly and drop your eyes whilst you push his hands away and stand up off the bed. He lays down and watches you pace away.

“I’d also make a good Lady because I am stubborn, a good ruler needs that,” you play along, making him chuckle. However, you end your amusement fast and grow serious.

“But you truly can’t say that,” you mutter and grab the pillar of his bed to spin around and begin to walk to the other side. “You can’t say those things to me.” You remind him sharply.

“If I put a babe in your belly they’ll send you back to me,” he suddenly blurts, causing you to stop just as you reach the other side of the bed to stare at him in disbelief.

“You’ll have no choice but to be my wife and Lady,” he adds the fire, but regardless of the heat that basks your face you pretend to be bothered and grab a pillow off his bed to throw at him. Albeit Cregan catches it and snickers.

“My darling love,” he adds and then flips on his bed to crawl towards you. “Is that not your wish? Your greatest desire? I can put one in you now. Have you back with me in 60 days. ”

“Cregan,” you mumble and sigh with sadness knowing it’s not something that can happen. “You’d know what would happen if you did. Aemond would come after you, my family would too.”

Cregan sits up on his knees before he grabs your hand and suddenly yanks you towards him on the bed, making you yelp as you grab onto his shoulders.

“What?” He counters. “You don't think I can fight him?” He snickers and cups your face. “I’d do it. I’d fight every fucking man in this world if it meant making you my wife.”

It’s these words that only add to your ache about leaving, that only makes you swoon that much more for a man you can’t have.

“I have to—”

“Quiet,” he interrupts you and covers your mouth, making you let out a muffled scoff and twist your face to demonstrate your discontent. “Don’t say it,” he says, knowing that you were going to tell him you had to leave. “Just lay with me tonight.” He pulls his hand away from your mouth and pulls you down with him so you can lie right next to him on his bed.

You debate on dwelling on the matter, but if these are your last moments, then you want to appreciate them, so you don’t bring up your fate and just let him gently stroke your exposed back with his fingers. You snuggle against his warm chest and embrace him, you don’t think about anything but him in the comforting silence that blankets the two of you.

It’s stupid of you, but you love him.

——

*A COUPLE DAYS LATER*

Tonight is the last night you’ll ever spend together. Tonight is the last night you’ll see his beautiful face basked by the moon's soft light, tonight is the last night you’ll touch his lips, laugh, and hear his sweet voice pour in your ear like honey. Tonight is the last night you’ll be embraced by his warmth, it’s the last time you’ll have his smell filter in your nose, it’s the last time you'll hear him laugh, and see his smile painted on his features.

Tonight is the last night you can be lovers before you have to act as mere strangers passing through the night. And he’s making the most of it, acting as if nothing is going to happen. You try to act as clueless as him, but the thoughts keep coming back.

“Cregan,” you call out as he keeps walking deeper in the woods. “It’s far enough, and It’s cold, perhaps we should go to your quarters.”

Cregan peers back briefly and flashes you an assuring smile. “Not much further, just catch up.” He waves you over, forcing you to pick up your pace in the fresh snow that blankets the ground tonight. However, you come to a quick stop at the same time Cregan does when a wolf's howl breaks out from very close by; or at least that’s what it seems, maybe it’s your sudden fear that makes you hear it.

“Cregan,” you whisper sharply and approach quickly to clutch onto his arm. “Let’s go back to our usual spot, come on. These aren’t our grounds.” You look out to the depths of the woods to see if you’d find a pair of glowing eyes.

“These are my grounds,” Cregan corrects you and reaches for your hand. “Come let’s get closer.” He tugs you further, but you instantly yank him back.

“Are you mad?” You argue in panic and slight judgment. “There can be a pack of wolves out there.”

Cregan scoffs and grabs both of your hands to pull you towards him and counter. “And you have a dragon, don’t be frightened.”

“Astraea wouldn’t bite our faces off and shred us apart with her teeth,” you counter back louder. “The wolves will, and Astraea can only get here so fast.”

Cregan shoots you a smirk, just a simple smirk before he lets your hands fall to run ahead without you.

“Cregan?!” You shout as you stay put and watch as he reaches the top of the small hill before you lose his figure past some trees. “Cregan, don’t leave me alone!”

Seven hells!

Fucking man…

You squint your gaze and take a step forward, but don’t catch a glimpse of him. You just hear the sound of a wolf howling again, causing your heart to skip a beat before it starts to race as your fear heightens. “Cregan!” You call out for him again. “Don’t jest with me!”

You take another cautious step forward and stick your neck out, but still nothing.

Alas then, from the deafening silence, there’s a scream that comes from Cregan up ahead.

The wolf got him!

Rather than being hesitant, you pick up your dress's skirt and run where you saw him disappear to even if there’s a wolf close by.

“Cregan?!” You cry out desperately and proceed to come to a stop when you don’t see him or a wolf. “Cregan?!” You grab onto the tree and turn your head from side to side, however, it’s at that exact moment that hands slap against your shoulders and a quiet “boo,” is whispered in your ear, causing you to yelp and spin around hastily.

And there in the shadows is Cregan, his gray eyes reflecting his joy, while his smile shines just as bright as the stars and the moon before his evil laugh fills the silence.

“Why would you do that?!” You remark with anger before you try to shove him back. However, he catches your wrists in time.

Yet Cregan’s feet aren’t planted against the ground well, and the force you put behind your hit is strong, so he loses balance and falls backward, taking you along with him since he refuses to let go. When he hits the ground you scramble to get up, but the hill you fall on is steep, so you accidentally tumble and take him with you down the snow-covered hill.

He of course laughs the entire way down, but you find no amusement in what happened considering he had you worried sick.

“You are cruel,” you grumble the moment you stop rolling and fall on him. “You are a cruel man.”

You try to move to the side, but he grabs your hands and tugs you back down against him.

“It was only a jest, my love,” he coos and grabs your face. “I just wanted to see something.”

You shoot him a glare and shake your head. “What? How bad I can get a heart attack? I thought you got hurt.”

“And you came running, I’m honored,” he counters with a smirk before he pulls you in for a kiss. Albeit you pull away and smack his chest.

“It wasn’t funny, I was worried,” you mumble with a pout and turn your head away.

Cregan finds this more amusing so he lifts his head and tries to steal kisses from you, but you keep pushing him away and turning your head. When he finally has enough of you turning away he presses his hand against your back to flip you over with ease so he can be on top of you.

“Don’t be angry with me,” he whispers. “It’s funny, laugh.”

You hold his gaze and feign a laugh, causing him to roll his eyes.

“What is it you wanted to show me?” You ask and lift your arms to grab his biceps. “Maybe that will change my mood?”

Cregan smiles softly and caresses your cheek. “I’m more than content staying right here, I love the view.” He tries to prolong this moment with sweet words that work to make you swoon.

“Well,” you whisper reluctantly. “My view isn’t terrible either…but my ass is getting wet.”

Cregan feigns concern. “Really? Let me see.”

“Pft,” you blow out and slide your hands down his arms to grab his hands.

“Come then,” he stops messing around and keeps your hand warm under his grasp as he pulls you with him. “Let me show you the world.”

No matter the impending doom, your grin widens and that fear vanishes completely, leaving only curiosity and glee where sorrow should be. Once you arrive at where he wanted to go you immediately know you should’ve known better because this place isn’t new, you’ve been on the hill that overlooks Winterfell before. Many times actually it’s his favorite spot after all.

Regardless, the castle from higher ground is truly a beautiful sight with all the glimmering torch lights, and the moonlight dancing on the snow around the ancient grounds.

“Sit,” he demands as he extends his cloak over the ground. “This way you won’t have to get your pretty ass wet.”

You meet his gaze and snicker as you sit, letting him lie down in front of you so he can rest his head on your lap.

“I’ll miss Winterfell,” you mention as you look at the castle below while you stroke his arm. “In a month's time, it’s back to, “yes your Grace, no your Grace”. Locked towers. The insufferable Ser Criston Cole who thinks he’s high and mighty, and my fucking uncle Aegon.” You groan in frustration.

“I can go beat him bloody,” Cregan offers.

You shake your head. “No, it’s fine. I can handle him. Maybe show him a thing or two as well,” you say smugly, making Cregan smirk.

“That’s my girl,” he says.

You smile down at him and lean down to steal a kiss from his pink lips, but he doesn't fail to ruin the moment.

“If that place is such torture, then stay,” he doesn’t suggest, or persuade you, he’s demanding now.

“All your things are already here. I only need to ask your mother for your hand.”

Your smile drops, and you avert your gaze, not wanting to entertain this further. You want this to be a good last night.

“I may not be ecstatic to return to King's Landing, but I have to go see my grandfather the King, he’s clinging onto life,” you find an excuse that doesn’t involve Aemond just yet. “I miss my family. I want to see my mother soon after I arrive. As well as my brothers, my cousins, all my family who I miss terribly.” You don’t excuse yourself this time, it’s all coming from your heart's desire. You've been apart for so long and can’t really fathom another year without seeing them.

You only wish you could see your father Laenor too.

“You’ll see them at your wedding to your prince,” Cregan grumbles. “Speak the truth, you want to return to him.”

You swallow back the lump forming in your throat and then look down at him with your face contorted in slight annoyance and shock. “No,” you argue back right away to assure him. “No, Aemond…he’s a stranger to me now. We’re betrothed, he was my best friend, but he stopped sending ravens, he stopped caring. He means nothing more than a stranger does.”

Cregan sits up and turns to face you. “Then stay,” he insists. “If he truly is a stranger then stay with me. Marry me. Don’t leave me in agony.”

You sigh deeply and shake your head with a pitiful look on your face. “You know I can’t do that, it’s not that simple,” you argue for his sake and yours.

Cregan however, clenches his jaw and huffs out before adding to his argument. “I told you I’d fight him. I’ll fight everyone that comes in my way.”

You can’t let his words affect you now, no matter how fast it makes your heart race, or how hot your face burns as you grow flustered.

“We’ve kissed, we’ve laid together, you are mine,” he presses passionately. “I’ll kill him to prove it.”

“No,” you quickly rebuttal, causing him to stiffen and furrow his eyebrows as he starts to believe the opposite of what you try to tell him.

“He has the oldest dragon,” you press so he can listen to reason, while you grab Cregan's arms to keep him close. “He’d kill you first. And if he does then…” you trail off and scoff. “Then what will become of me without you?”

Cregan pushes your hands away and stands up with a scowl twisted on his face. “I don’t care because I hate the idea of him touching you, of him kissing you the way I kiss you. I fill with rage knowing he’ll be inside you.”

Your body begins to burn with desire at his words, at the sound of his jealousy, but you don’t let him tempt you, you just stand up and let him grab your cheeks.

“I don’t want him to see you smile, or-or feel your comfort,” Cregan continues to recite beautiful words. “He hurt you already,” he whispers and traces the scar on your face that Aemond accidentally left you with. “I just want you to be mine.”

You shiver at his gentle touch, you crave for more, but you still push him away. “If that’s so then…” you pause and let out a shaky sigh as your eyes fill with tears and that lump of emotions returns to crawl up your throat. “…I wish we had never become friends. I wish we had never met, or loved each other the way we do—”

“Don’t say that,” he cuts you off and approaches you, but you step back.

“I don’t want to be the bane of your existence Cregan,” you finish saying with tears rolling down your cheeks. “I told you before, that night we revealed ourselves to one another for the first time. And you,” you point. “You were okay with it. You knew what was going to happen. You know I’m stubborn, you knew nothing was going to change my fate.” You stifle your whimper and drop your head.

“Look at me,” he says sternly, making you lift your gaze to meet his gray eyes that brew like the angriest storm.

“I’d rather die tomorrow than spend a century without knowing you,” he says, making your breath catch. “You will never be the bane of my existence. Never. Forgive me.”

He approaches you and you let him this time. “But I just don’t understand why you want to marry the prince. Do you not love me?”

You nod and cup his jaw to assure him. “I love you. I just…” you hesitate. “I'm just afraid of losing you. If you win a fight for my hand, Aemond won't stop there, and I can’t even breathe with the thought of living my life without you. Sure we’ll be far from one another, but I’ll be content knowing your heart is beating, and that we are living under the same sky,” you whisper and lower one hand to press it against his chest to feel his heartbeat. “That we share the same sun, that we look at the same moon and stars.”

You offer him a sad smile and he admires it while he swallows thickly, and lingers there stiffly for a moment before he suddenly pulls you in for a deep and passionate kiss that is cut too short.

“So be it then,” he gives in as he pulls away. “I’ll let you go without a fight. I’ll ache for you every day, I’ll love you from afar and want nothing but happiness for you, my sweet love,” he tries to assure you in the way you want to be assured even if the words he says are like bile in his mouth. He presses his forehead against yours and begins to caress your face while he smiles softly at you. “If I hear that he hurt you I’ll march down there and kill him.”

You chuckle and feel tears stream down your cheeks. “Okay,” you whisper. “I’ll write to you every week. Don’t forget me.”

Cregan shakes his head and scoffs. “Don’t speak madness woman, I’d never forget you. I’ll write back every week. And if you don’t get married 6 months from now I will go to your mother personally and ask for your hand.”

You beam at him and nod, knowing that you’ll be married by then. “All right. Okay. I like the sound of that.”

Cregan pulls his head back to take in the sight of your face he thinks is so enchantingly beautiful for a lingering moment before he slams his lips on yours to kiss you again with more passion before he can’t ever again.

——

*THE NEXT MORNING*

No matter how much you keep telling yourself it was going to happen, nothing could actually prepare you for leaving Cregan and Winterfell. You couldn't even sleep a wink or eat knowing that your life was going to change again.

All your friends, Cregan, and every aspect of this life as you know it is going to become nothing but good memories. Which is very hilarious considering you dreaded coming five years ago; now you don’t want to part from it. Or him.

“Farewell, my friend,” you tell Rolf who is now a Knight, and now stands a foot over you; he was small when you first met.

“Farewell, Princess, may our paths cross again,” he redirects sweetly with a friendly smile.

You draw in a small shaky breath and nod before you step forward and surprise him with an embrace. “If you ever find yourself at King’s Landing come find me, just say you want to talk to me.” You tell him softly.

Rolf tightens his arms around you and assures you. “Of course, Princess.”

You linger in the embrace for a moment longer hoping to drag on this interaction because once you part away the last person to say goodbye to is Cregan.

But no matter how much you fight it, the inevitable is already upon you. There was no avoiding it.

“Farewell, Lord Stark,” you say softly as if you were no more than friends, you don’t even hide your tears even if they’re really for the lover you’re leaving behind and can’t kiss one last time, or tell him how much you love him.

“Thank you for letting me stay, for making Winterfell my home.”

Cregan clenches his fist to resist himself from comforting you, from kissing you, and forcing you to stay. He holds himself back even if it pains him.

“Farewell,” he puts in a simple word with that stern voice he uses when he’s amongst his people. “…Sweet Princess.”

He steps forward as he holds your gaze and reaches his hand out to ask for yours. You know what he wants and don’t hesitate to give him your gloveless hand.

When your warm flesh touches his, he carefully embraces your hand with his and then pulls it towards his lips to press a friendly kiss on your knuckles.

You shiver at the feeling of his wet lips but continue to hold his gaze as if nothing. You let your hand linger in his and push yourself to add more to your final farewell. “Write, I’ll be far but it doesn’t mean we still can’t maintain our friendship.” You smile and slowly pull your hand away to clasp it in front of you again.

“I will,” he assures you and then looks away for the first time since he’s walked you to your carriage to look back at one of the servants and give him a nod.

“I have something for you,” Cregan adds and meets your gaze again, piquing your curiosity. “A farewell present from me and Rickon.”

You slowly begin to grin and look at the servant who falls beside him and hands him a small wooden crate.

“I know how much you love these feline creatures so I want you to take one home,” he continues while motioning you closer with his eyes. When you’re a few inches away you look into the crate and see a small but chunky balled-up dark gray kitten.

“Oh,” you muse and open the crate to carefully take it out. “Hello, my beautiful friend.”

“It’s a piece of Winterfell to take with you,” Cregan interjects as he admires you comforting the kitten.

“Don’t worry, Astraea won’t eat you,” you assure the kitten. “You’ll be friends, won’t you, Wolf?” You give the gray kitten a name that reminds you of Cregan’s gray eyes. You then blink and look over at Cregan with a beaming grin. “Thank you, Lord Stark. I love the gift. I shall love it, cherish it, and always keep it safe.” You exhale deeply and let your handmaidens take the crate as you step back towards your carriage that will take you to the harbor.

“Farwell once again,” you keep longing the interaction as much as you can.

“Farewell, Princess,” Cregan says one more time using your birth name and your old family name while he also clenches his hands into fists again.

You hope he’ll keep interjecting with more but this time he doesn’t ask for your hand, he doesn’t hand you another present, this time it’s time to leave, thus, after one last lingering look you turn and walk to the carriage with tears forming in your eyes. Once you reach the steps, however, Cregan is there beside you, you meet his dark gray eyes for one last time and give him your hand again to let him cup it and help you up the two steps.

Before you can walk inside and close the door in front of him though, you linger there, you hold his comforting gaze even as Astraea lets out a soft cry in the distance. Neither of you want to pull away, but you have to, you have to leave, so you pull away first and walk in. You let the coach close the door before Cregan and minimize your view of his beautiful face.

The coach doesn’t take long to depart from that spot it was stationed at after that, he doesn’t know about your aching hearts, he doesn’t know to slow down so you could look at Cregan’s gray eyes and his pale face through the little gaps designed on the window for longer than a glimpse. The coach races out, making Cregan’s figure disappear before your very eyes, and letting you see snow, endless blankets of snow.

You want to cry badly, but you can’t, you don’t want to give anything away, so you hold onto your kitten, Wolf, and let Astraea express your hidden sadness with her melancholy song as she follows the carriage.

Now onto the stranger who was once your best friend, but who is still your betrothed, Aemond.

.

.

.

.

.

Tagged- @namelesslosers @stargaryenx @chainsawsangel @lauftivy @winxschester @cloudroomblog @llarue @padsdarlg @sofietargaryen @gracielikegrapes @dreaming-of-the-reality @itzelpeyton @patdsinner33 @mrsdominickstark @elaena-aerrin @todoroki-slut @snh96 @urmomsgirlfriend1 @nifujiswhore @sweethoneyblossom1 @kaetastic @lightdragonrayne @squidscottjeans

[payattentiontothescreen]

Some of My Favorite Queer Relationship Arcs

This is not a comprehensive list by any means. These are just a few stand-outs for me.

Fig Faeth and Ayda Aguefort

There are two major things I love about Fig and Ayda. The first one is that Fig wasn’t into the idea of a real relationship before Ayda came along. Beyond her rendezvous with adult men (which were disturbing at best), Fig never sought a relationship. As someone with a lot of experience as a teenage disaster, I see a lot of myself in Fig. Her meeting Ayda completely changed her view of relationships and herself. The second thing is that Ayda was originally supposed to be a fetch quest side character. Emily became attached to her, so she became a major NPC. Not only does that represent one of my favorite parts of playing D&D (ask me about the time I bumped an NPC’s status by flirting with him), but Ayda’s story on its own is just so powerful. A Black, autistic lesbian being loved and accepted, not just by Fig, but all the Bad Kids. I just love them so much.

Dana and Rachel

They never break up. Dana and Rachel have so many hurdles, so many obstacles they have to overcome. It looks like they’re about to break up a couple of times, but they never do. It is amazing to see a queer couple go through so much bullshit that never breaks their relationship. It is an amazing, mature relationship between two admittedly immature women. Also, Ashly Burch, my beloved.

Beverly Toegold V and Erlin Kindleaf (I couldn't find a gif of them)

Another teen actual-play couple, I couldn’t help myself. Honestly, they’re just so sweet. I think part of the reason I love them so much is because I wasn’t expecting queer relationships when I started listening to NADDPod. Shortsighted, I know. Their relationship is so adorable. The thing that really drives it home for me is Bev’s whole thing with Terran. Hear me out. They mention this in the episode, but Bev and Erlin aren’t actually in a relationship when Terran shows up. They’re dating, but dating without having a label when you’re a teenager is basically just being friends and knowing you like each other. I don’t blame Bev for kissing Terran. Like I said with Fig, I have a lot of experience as a teenage disaster. The fact that Bev was so shaken up by his momentary lapse in judgment that he insisted on sleeping in separate beds from Moonshine and Hardwon says a lot to me.

TK Strand and Carlos Reyes

These boys cannot catch a break. They are so messy and insane and I love them for it. One of my absolute favorite relationship dynamics is “they will always find their way back to each other.” TK and Carlos embody this perfectly. Whether it’s emotionally, mentally, or physically, they will always find their way home. To each other. The drama did get a bit tedious, especially with their break-up between seasons 2 and 3. But they love each other so much and that love is beautiful to watch.

There are obviously more queer relationships that I love. This list is in no way complete. These are the ones that I have been thinking about a lot recently. Hope y'all are having a good pride month. I'll see you soon!

[mss-pit]

Bravern episode preview translations

These are translations of the episode previews posted on the Cygames youtube channel that weren't included in any streaming services. They are just episode previews but they have some funny/interesting dialogue so I thought I'd post them because I haven't seen them translated anywhere else.

Episode 1:

Smith: "Now! Our story finally begins!" Isami: "' Story '"? Oh, like a report, like in a documentary, right?" Smith: "New program: Bang Brave Bang Bravern. Episode one: "Wait's Over, Isami!" " Isami: "What's going on with that title?" Smith: "It's the coolest thing ever, right? Wait's over, Isami!"

Episode 2:

Bravern: "Isami! That was a rendezvous of our souls! Incredible, wasn't it?" Isami: "It was awful." Bravern: "For everything that has happened so far, and everything after this… I put my trust in you, Isami." Isami: "Wait, didn't we just meet?" Bravern: "Next episode: Bang Brave Bang Bravern episode two: "Isami! You'll be here soon, won't you, Isami!?" Isami: "Are all the titles going to be like this?" Bravern: "Isami… I will always be waiting for you."

Episode 3:

Bob: "Well… that was just another part of my job." Isami: sigh Bob: "You're pretty tough, being able to handle that much with that ridiculous machine thrashing around." Isami: "Well… my clothes got torn up, though." Bob: "Next episode: Bang Brave Bang Bravern episode three: "Lulu… That's Her Name". Bob: "Wait, did you say Lulu?" Isami: "Do you know anything?" Bob: "No, I don't know anything." Isami: "Then what was that all about?"

Episode 4: Lulu: "Smith, Smith!" Smith: "Don't cling to me! Um, Lulu?" Lulu: "Lulu, Lulu! Smith: "I told you to let go! …Isami looks like he's in a really bad mood." Bob: "Um, next episode: Bang Brave Bang Bravern episode four: "Isami, it seems you st!ll have much to learn about people". " Lulu: " [ Inaudible ] Gaga-pi!" Smith: "Why are they making her read out the episode title?" Lulu: "Gaga-pi!" Smith: "I wonder people can understand what she said?"

Episode 5:

Hibiki: "Oh! Looks like I'm doing the episode preview with Lulu-chan!" Lulu: "Episode preview! Gaga-pi!" Hibiki: "Um, it looks like Isami and Smith are going to have a face-off? Like a meeting of fists? I guess guys just love that kind of thing." Lulu: [slurred] Next episode: episode five! Hibiki: "That's one thing that's beyond my powers" Lulu: "Does Hibiki not want to do gaga-pi with Lulu?" Hibiki: "Hmm… that depends on the contents of the gaga-pi."

Episode 6: Smith: "Isami… I'm relieved you weren't hurt after falling off the aircraft carrier…" Isami: "Yeah… I thought I was going to die…" Smith: "I'm glad! And Lulu seems to like you now too!" Isami: "That's not a good thing at all!" Smith: "Next episode: Bang Brave Bang Bravern episode six: "Everything will be okay. For I… I am Bravern!"

Smith: We're finally going to Japan, Isami!" Isami: "What's 'okay' about that? Why are the titles so long every time? Every time, every time, every time…" Smith: "Um, calm down, Isami?"

Episode 7: Bravern: "Ha ha ha, hello to all good children out there! It's finally Bravern's turn again! I'm putting all my spirit into doing this episode preview!" Superbia: "Why am I being brought along?" Bravern: "Oh, Superbia. That's because you can speak Earth's language now." Superbia: "All I want to do is face against you. And to do that, I need Lulu." Bravern: "Next episode: Bang Brave Bang Bravern episode seven: "Well, Isami? What would you do in a situation like this?"

Bravern: Well, Isami? What are you going to do? Hm? Hm?" Superbia: "He's like a mayfly."

Episode 8: Superbia: "So, it seems like I am being made to do this again." Smith: "Now this is a pretty wild pair-up… And anyway, it looks like the next episode is a pretty serious one." Superbia: "It seems like my Lulu is quite attached to you." Smith: " sigh I really don't want to bring her along to the battlefield." Superbia: "Next episode: Bang Brave Bang Bravern episode eight: "Until We Meet Again, Smith" " Smith: "Huh? That's unusally short." Superbia: "Lewis Smith… I will not forget you." Smith: "We've barely even talked…"

Episode 9: Isami: "Smith… Smith…! What the hell did you do? Why did you die? Isami: "Next episode: Bang Brave Bang Bravern episode nine: "Isami! We must save the world together!" Isami: There's no point to any of this if you're not here… Smith!"

Episode 10: Smith: "Um… so… can we really do this?" Bravern: "Hmpf. We can do this because it's just the episode preview, Lewis Smith." Smith: "So, I am Bravern, and Bravern is me… correct?" Bravern: "I am you and you are me." Both: "Next episode: Bang Brave Bang Bravern episode ten: "In Japan, They Call This OMIAI" " Smith: "And that means…" Bravern: "Let's leave it to the two young ones."

Episode 11: Bravern: "They say their farewells to everyone and take their leave: Isami, Lulu, Superbia, and Bravern." Isami: "Huh? Are you doing it like a normal episode preview now?" Bravern: "They embark in Hawaii, and what awaits them is… Bravern: Next episode: Bang Brave Bang Bravern episode nine: "Commence Operation Bonfire!"

Bravern: "Let's go, Isami! This is our final battle!" Isami: "…just what kind of operation is this?"

Episode 12: Smith: "Bravery." Lulu: "Friendship." Bravern: "Hard work, willpower!" Isami: "And… love." Everyone: "Bang Brave Bang Bravern final episode: "Beyond Brave Bang"." Isami: "Bravern, Smith, Lulu, Superbia… everyone. Lend me your power!"

[theflyindutchwoman]

Wait, is she touching you? She's touching you, isn't she? Hey, you know what? If she offers you money for sex, I'm gonna win this bet. Look, I am down to do whatever you want. Yeah, you are.

| ANATOMY OF A SCENE - CHENFORD EDITION 4.07 - Fire Fight

What I love about this scene is how unassuming it appears to be : for all intents and purposes, this moment is meant to offset the more serious and dramatic part of the episode. Nothing else. And yet, it hides so many layers… One of them is how it actually gives us an aperçu of Tim and Lucy going undercover together at the end of the season. With the way they flirt here, it makes their practice kiss and all their display even more inevitable. And this is the perfect continuation of Lucy's last UC op, where she flirted with him to pass him the informations she had (and save his life). That their default mode while undercover is to flirt says everything… Those mission really gives them the cover and freedom they need to explore their feelings without revealing their hand. Having Tim go undercover, with Lucy as his handler, is also a perfect role reversal, where the student has become the master. He doesn't once question her expertise : he might protest but it's more out of habit than anything else. It's certainly never out of malice. Now add Tim's baggage when it comes to that line of work… And it brings out another layer. Interestingly though, this side is not explored. The aim here is to ease him into this, without triggering any bad memories the way Lucy's very first op did. This is a short stint, with no high stakes. And this explains why he doesn't protest much when Lucy suggests he goes undercover as Jake in the first place : the fun they have here might have played a part.

Lucy is definitely enjoying this way too much, instantly ragging on Tim's choice of clothes when he shows up at the rendezvous. They haven't even started yet and he looks done already. This is such a good reminder of their first dynamic : grumpy/sunshine. He just can't hide his smile, even in front of her, anymore - like when she recites the UC rules. The walls are down. Also, the fact that she had a jacket ready for him, clearly having expected this to happen, just shows how well she knows him.

But aside from all this fun, there's this undercurrent of tension that rises to the surface when Tim puts the jacket on… or when he lifts his shirt off, showing off his abs… The atmosphere here is so different than when she caught him wearing only a towel at Rachel's place. There is an awareness now that wasn't there yet. And it's even more intense with their close proximity. Or with Lucy having to touch him. It's just so intimate. The looks they exchange… It's electric. It's close to how it felt for a moment at Tim's place… Until he realises that she's placing the mic too high on his chest… Is it distraction? Is it on purpose? Either way, the way she rips off the tape, looking so smug, and his high-pitched scream are hilarious. Her sorry doesn't even sound sorry at all. #sorrynotsorry

And from there, it goes completely unhinged. Only these two would openly flirt and riling the other up while one of them is undercover. Now, to be fair, it started normally, with Lucy coaching Tim. But the second Aston began flirting with him, professionalism went out of the window. Then again, these are the same idiots who were making out 'for work', so maybe it is their definition of professionalism. Tim is trying to remain in-character but Lucy is having the time of her life, listening to their conversation. His smirk when Aston caresses his hand and Lucy comments on it, reminding him of their bet and how he might unwittingly help her win it if their mark keeps this up… They are so flirty here, openly, taking advantage of the situation… And that really lays the groundwork for Vegas. The fact that Lucy is basically whispering in his ear, that he can't see her, brings a certain level of intimacy… And while he is talking to Aston, his reactions are for Lucy. Like his big smile : sure, he is amused by their suspect's behavior, but I have a hard time believing that this isn't Lucy's comments that provoked it. There's such a double meaning to their dialogue… Like when he tells their suspect he is 'down to do whatever [she wants]', with Lucy instantly answering him with her iconic 'yeah you are'… She couldn't have said it in a more lusty tone.

This is all ambiguous, giving them plausible deniability. It allows them to act in a less than professional way, but without any repercussion. Almost as if they're testing the water. And it makes sense that Tim tries to take a step back after this mission, to reclaim some boundaries… Well, for a short while. All of this just comes back in full force when they have to go undercover as a couple… with no going back.

[miimo96]

Thoughts on My Adventures with Superman S2 episode 4

Alright 2 things, 1 I love how General lane Not only set up an entire bunker like fortress in Clark and Jimmy's apartment, but also made them Use a Code word in order for them to Even get in, 2 I Reallly love Clark's reaction to Jimmy's achievement, it really shows how much he cares about his friend and is really happy for him 😊 Also is it me or has the Animation gotten So much Better this Season, they really stepped their Game up since the Spiderman fiasco, especially when it comes to the lighting and faces, I mean just look at Clark's smile here >_<

Bruh I'm calling it right now, by the end of this Season Jimmy is going to lose ALL of his Money, that Money meter keeps going down each episode, if that isn't foreshadowing Idk what is ^^;

Once again I'm really loving the relationship between these 2, the fact that Jimmy wants Clark to come not because he's an Alien but because he's his best friend is really sweet, and it really shows just how much the writers Really know about Superman and his world and want to make it to the best version, also the fact that Clark is LITERALLY deciding which outfit seems more "Hype man" is Really funny to me, especially Jimmy's comeback line after this

Judging how Waller is clearly making another Task force X I wanna say this Blockbuster, but I'm not entirely sure, so far this guy's only appeared in like a few episodes this season, So if they kill him off I Wont entirely be mad, because he serves No purpose other than filling out the Villain slots, and the reason why I'm saying this might be Blockbuster is because I can't recall another Villain with super strength and Built like this in the suicide Squad other than blockbuster, who coincidently died IMMEDIATELY in a Suicide Squad comic run

Even though the episode is clearly about lois and father, it's Super obvious that it was actually focused on the relationship between Clark and Jimmy, and how they feel about 1 another, this scene with Clark telling Jimmy about how he's made him feel was really beautiful and Ngl, I kinda teared up at this point, the relationship between the 2 is some of the best I've seen in a Long time since the animated series back on WB Kids, they really put a lot of effort into fleshing out each character and making us Fall in love with them even more ^w^

The whole Superman Debate Scene was great, I really loved how Lex and Jimmy are basically two polar opposites, 1 supporting superman and his pureness and the other being Superman's biggest Hater, with both literally being incredibly rich rn, and it's kinda funny, while Jimmy is losing money, Lex is Gaining money, gaining everyhing that we know him for; Lex brought up a lot of good points regarding Superman and how "Dangerous" he is, Stuff that I think will Return in Season 3 with people Gunning for Superman or trying to Eliminate him, maybe we might actually see Batman Show up Next season 😏

I find it So CONVENIENT that general lane's Rendezvous point Just so happens to be near the STAR Labs EXPO, almost like if this was planned for this to happen here, So that when Superman shows up he could be made out as the Bad guy *looks intently at Lex*

As Sad as this scene is you're really telling me He DIDN'T HEAR THAT!? I mean the dude has SUPER HEARING for a reason, you're REALLY telling me he Didn't hear that? Ok whatever Sure, I guess super hearing Only works when the Writers Need it huh, even though they made a WHOLE episode about that Last season 😒

🥺🥺🥺 I don't have any words for this scene other than Seeing Clark like this really hurts my soul, seeing him come to the Realization that he's Never gonna truly fit in and that He NEEDS Someone like him to Really understand him just shows how much Clark has repressed these feelings by trying to be Something he's not, which is human, Now he's Finally starting to accept his Alien/Kryptonian half, with the 1st step being to find someone Truly like him

ZOD IS HERE OMG ZOD IS HERE!!

Also I Officially dub these Days "Superman Saturday's" ^^ 🦸‍♂️

[copiouscouples]

Bridgerton - A Dissertation

Chemistry is subjective and that's why I love Bridgerton. If one couple isn't your bag, then there are others to choose from.

Personally, I've enjoyed all the seasons. I just love to see love unfold.

Season 1 was such a new animal. It was the novelty of it all. Nothing had been done like this before. You either had the adulterous, explicit, and/or violent sex scenes of Outlander or Game of Thrones or you had chaste Austen (which j'adore but still). There is no other show (even though there have been attempts) that combines the sweet romantic side of love with sexy times. And on top of that you have the costumes and the humor and the diversity.

Simon and Daphne's love story for me was so beautiful watching it simply because it was like they'd turned the historical romances I love reading so much into a tv show.

Season 2 I was so pumped for. The first 4 episodes were delicious. The looks, the stares, the verbal sparring, the passionate declarations, and almost kisses. Be still my heart. The wedding episode was a giant buzzkill. It ground all that momentum to a halt. Edwina deciding not to marry Anthony should've been a 5 minute scene max. That episode took up time when we could've seen them make progress on their relationship. After that, the plot did bounce back. Then, we got their love scene in the garden. I think the most apt description I've seen of that is that it was like a hot music video. It was fine and all, but I was wanting more. It wasn't rewatchable like the Simon and Daphne scenes.

Then Queen Charlotte came along and wowzers did I love that show on so many levels. It was gorgeously done, funny, sweet, heartbreaking, and sexy. George and Charlotte were a good couple but knowing their ending wasn't so happy definitely put an asterisk next to it.

Season 3 came along and at first I was a little indifferent about it for multiple reasons.

1) I hadn't been fully sold on Luke and Nicola's chemistry. It seemed too friend-like (which I know is the point but still). On top of that, there's their real life age gap. Luke N. is super attractive but I was envisioning someone older and more mature (because I know the books have Pen and Colin as older).

2) Friends to lovers isn't a favorite trope of mine.

3) I really wanted Eloise or Benedict's season to be next.

But oh my word, guys, I am really digging this season. Probably more so than even Queen Charlotte.

Things I Love:

Colin being the pursuer and driver of the relationship instead of Daphne in season 1 or Daphne/Edwina/circumstances in season 2. It's delicious to see Colin chasing Penelope. And yeah, she did ask him to kiss her but home skillet didn't ask him to show up at her house for a late night rendezvous. That was all him.

A less angry/bitter male lead. Colin likely has daddy issues too, but he is just more emotionally in-tune (when he allows himself to be) and doesn't take it out on others. He's sweet and lovable and a perfect cinnamon roll when he's not posing.

The Sexy times are back! That carriage scene was 10/10 - no notes. And it was sexy because of the feelings component. And we're getting more! I'm gonna pass out!

Even though I wish they'd hurry a bit and get them back to being friends, I do enjoy seeing the Eloise and Penelope friendship aftermath. I love seeing how much they care about each other despite being angry/hurt by one another.

That height difference, tho!

I feel like we can all take enjoyment from different couples and different seasons. We're all different and different tropes resonate with us. There is something to be enjoyed by all with Bridgerton.

[whyisstarkidfollowingmeshoo]

I'm reading a lot of things about Hidge's sexuality canon wise. So taking account on what Nick and Matt Lang said (as much as I remember it without rewatching the video proof lol) my argument on why the canon sexuality of Prof. Henry Hidgens is that he is bisexual and Objectumsexual.

Well I think canon wise he is not polyamorous. I can accept that (i have no problem with him being poly canon wise. I am not anti-poly, just faithful with canon) but I remember Nick Lang or even Matt did not specify it. They said, within along the lines/paraphrasing: Henry loves his six boy friends, they are special to him, but Chad IS the apple of his eye. The last sentence they meant romantically.

So why bisexual and not gay? To make it clear, I have no problem with him being gay. I'm willing to be corrected. But since I'm arguing that he's bisexual, well let me start. Of course we haven't seen Hidge talk about or falling in love with specific women characters in the saga so far, however he did say in TGWDLM " Alexa, I love you like every woman flesh and bone", so there ya go. If he can find a woman that is subordinate to him like Alexa and Siri, then he can have a relationship with a woman. Come to think of it, i think he loves Chad the most because I hypothesize Chad always goes along with his plans/ideas. Yes I believe if I were to analyze his relationship personality, he wants to be the dominant in the relationship. He's very controlling and spirals when he doesn't get his way. Which why this is a good segway to...

And with the mention of two famous AI virtual assistants, I think it's enough to say that Hidge has objectophilia. More so in NMT episode Time Bastard where he shared his sexual rendezvous with either one of them to Ted and implied how he did it (some imagination and a little elbow grease or any lube lol). Not to mention that he talks to Alexa and Siri like they're humans. Fun fact, I read somewhere that people who have this sexual orientation cant handle keeping a relationship with another human because they're too controlling hence having a relationship with an object is easier because it has no thoughts, no opinions to consider. Also, this can also be a result of a trauma. Him losing his friends, especially Chad, during a lightning strike attack did not just lead him to isolation and practicing survival instincts, but also drove him to loving objects instead cause at least they won't experience terrible human deaths. Here is the source: https://www.hindustantimes.com/sex-and-relationships/decoding-objectophilia-5-reasons-why-people-fall-in-love-with-objects/story-LMvWWzhs257dD47yxNGC9H.html UPDATE: these facts are more connected to the character that is Prof Henry Hidgens whose personality reflects the generalizing views of the orientation better. Real life Objectums are a lot more complicated than that and can act against stereotypes/generalization. Thanks @fork-bork for reminding me.

Also further explanation:  ur friends can be ur life partners (hence there are old people living with friends in their twilight years) and some people like calling their friends as boyfriends or girlfriends. Hidge is just comfortable with his sexuality and closeness with his friends that he can call his male friends as his boyfriends. I think that's just Jeff's word play and humor going on as he wrote the song. And according to the song "it takes balls": Steve was a priest, Leighton was in a relationship with a person named Gary, and Greg was seeing/dating Steve's mom. Plus all of the boys, sans Chad and Henry, were attracted to females while at college based on their locker room talk acted by the Workin Girls cast.

I'm not like Unhidge Hidge, so tell me about ur thoughts/opinions/rebuttals as long as ur taking account of what I wrote here. Especially proof from the Langs with ur rebuttal. Of course in head canon or fan fic world, anything is free reins and you can experiment with Hidge's sexuality there. Just make sure to specify if it's canon or head canon so to avoid confusion and arguments.

Update:

I have the urge to check my HHP Working Boys screen recordings where Nick and Matt discussed Henry's relationship with the boys if it's poly or not. Update 2: Okay I watched it and Nick just says that Chad is his favorite so get out of that as you wish. But since the boys did their locker room talk about girls without Henry and Chad, I don't think the boys were making out with each other unless maybe just Henry and Chad if it's not unreciprocated from Henry's side.

I can understand if most fans think Henry is gay and not bi since Nick and Matt have not given more concrete proof of his attraction to human females. My only arguments with him being bi is that he loves and has done sexual acts with Alexa and Siri, AI virtual assistants with female names and voices. (NMT episode: Time Bastard).

[sugartitstownley]

Hay I love your blog!!!

Could you do some relationship preferences for michael and trevor being together cute/hot or just cute?

ABC’s of Trikey

Thanks for the ask! I’m glad you like my blog!! I took some creative liberties with this and ran with it since I’ve been wanting to do the ABC prompt. So I hope you don’t mind. :) I did the fluff version [source], but I’d be open to doing the NSFW version too if someone would want that.

Warnings: Not a lot this time. Typical GTA-esque themes. There is a brief mention in the last letter (Z) about child abuse, but that’s about it. Mostly fluffy stuff.

A is for animals  [Do they have pets? What type?]

No, they don’t have any pets. Neither of them feel too strongly about having them, but the topic has came up once or twice — Michael being the most reluctant.

“It’d be like having another kid,” Michael gripes. “We’d have to clean its shit and make sure it doesn’t tear the house up.”

“But maybe it could teach you a thing or two about loyalty, you snake,” Trevor shoots back. “Plus, it’d give Chop a friend.”

“Can you honesty promise I wouldn’t come home one day to a mutilated dog after it chewed the fuck out of your clothes or bit you?”

“Well, I can’t promise I won’t mutilate you one day, but I still keep you around.”

That didn’t convince Michael. So no, they don’t have pets. They’ll stick to chaperoned visits with Franklin, Lamar, and Chop.

B is for bathroom  [What are their bathroom habits? Do they brush teeth at the same time? Fight about the toilet? Shower together? Have weird toiletries?]

Their bathroom habits are definitely a little bit opposing. Michael, unless he’s in one of his truly depressive episodes, is fairly clean. He often opts for the same routine every day: wake up, shower, shave (unless he’s growing it out, which sometimes he does), brush teeth, put on deodorant, spray on fancy cologne he spent way too much on, and leave.

Trevor, however, has less of a set schedule. He frequently chooses to forgo the traditional approach to “getting ready” unless Michael gets on him about it.

Once they start living together, though, Trevor does start to actively seek out a good shower quite often — if only so he can join his partner in a little morning rendezvous, which, of course, Michael is happy to indulge him in.

They don’t fight too much over bathroom etiquette, but, well, Trevor is still Trevor, so it’s inevitable sometimes.

“Oh, the fuck is this?” Michael mumbles, peering into the toilet below him. “Trevor!”

Mere seconds later, Trevor’s head is popping through the bathroom door. “Mm, morning to you too, sugar.”

“Tell me what I’m looking at here.”

“That,” Trevor follows his partner’s gaze to look inside the toilet bowl, “looks like a finger.”

“Yep, it does,” Michael nods along. “Why the fuck is it in our toilet?”

Trevor raises his hands in surrender. “Excuse me, I tried to get his arm down in one go, but people don’t flush like they used to. Ya know, I think it’s all the healthy shit people eat in LS. Makes their body more immune.”

“Jesus Christ.”

C is for children  [Do they have kids? Adopted or biological? What are their names? Any random head canons you have?]

Michael obviously has Tracey and Jimmy, so that’s really enough for them. Michael knows he’s already a shit father, so there’s no need to bring any more children into his world. Plus, Trevor loves both of those kids like they’re his own anyway.

And, all things considered, they both have Franklin too. Their surrogate child. Sure, Franklin pretends to be slightly disturbed at that mental image, but both men are sure he’s still happy to have them around.

Sometimes, when he’s really trying to embarrass Franklin, Trevor will talk about him to strangers like he’s their child. Michael tries to get him to stop — for the youngest boy’s sake — but he secretly finds it both endearing and funny. So, against his better judgement, Michael joins in sometimes.

“Kids are a handful, huh?”

The woman looks up from the screaming baby in her arms to Trevor, who’s talking over her shoulder. She looks slightly uncomfortable at his proximity, like she wants to push away the cart full of baby items in front of her and make a run for it, but she nods instead.

“They sure are. Got any?”

Trevor mirrors her nod before pointing over at Franklin. “Our baby boy is right there.”

Trevor can see Franklin shrink behind Michael, trying to get out of sight, while Michael stands there smirking.

“He’s just precious,” Trevor continues, his voice cracking with a faux sob. “They grow up so fast. Right in front of your eyes.”

The woman glances at Michael, almost like she’s hoping he’ll save her, but he only puts a hand to his heart and smiles. “They never stop melting your heart, though.”

As soon as the cashier yells “next,” the woman is rushing to the counter, and the two older men are left laughing as Franklin finally moves into sight.

“Fuck you both,” he grumbles.

D is for dates  [First date? Do they go out together regularly? Who usually plans?]

Their first date was definitely weird. Not in the “we shouldn’t be doing this” way. But in the “this feels like our first date and 50th simultaneously” way.

Back in North Yankton, neither of them really went on “first dates” — with each other or other people. A date feels more like a planned time to be romantic, but their relationship was anything but planned. In fact, everything often felt rushed and spontaneous, like neither knew when their life would suddenly end by imprisonment or death.

Now, as older men who feel way too past their prime and have way too much history among them to be going out on said “first dates,” the idea feels a little juvenile and silly.

Nonetheless, they do it. They do it if only for the sake of not being able to do it before. They go out on a first date — paired with nervous sweating, awkward conversations, and careful skirting over any past issues that could put a damper on the evening. It’s a simple dinner at an upscale restaurant in Vinewood, much to Trevor’s initial dismay.

“Out of all of San Andreas, this is where you pick, Mikey?”

“It’s a nice place, T.”

“Shocker that you think that, Mr. Plastic Pants,” Trevor says mockingly. “This place is full of fake celebrities and plastic surgeons. I feel like I’m about to slip and fall and accidentally get a boob job.”

“Can you just humor me for once? Please?”

And Trevor did because, truth be told, he’d go anywhere with Michael. Their first date was good all things considered, but they don’t make it a habit to go out often. It’s just not in their style — unless you count Trevor beating Michael at golf or them chasing down bikers a date, then sure.

When they do officially go out on dates, especially for important dates like anniversaries, it’s usually Michael who plans them. He’s much more of a classic date — dinner and a movie — kind of guy. He likely gets that from the movies he watches.

E is for embarrassment  [Does one get embarrassed by PDA? Do they say things to rile each other up?]

Michael does, at times, get embarrassed by Trevor’s public displays. It’s not that he’s ashamed of Trevor; it’s just harder to kick that religious guilt he’s used to. It has caused a rift a few times when Michael would flinch at Trevor calling him “baby” around strangers or throwing his arms around him and kissing his neck — especially since Michael can see their unapproving reactions in his peripheral vision.

Trevor, usually, reacts angrily — no doubt believing that his partner is embarrassed by him and their relationship. But Michael continues to reassure him until the issue is dropped.

After a few years, and a bit more therapy, the judging glances no longer irk him like they used to. And, as a result, he’ll let Trevor’s fingers snake through his or let his touch linger, even with the prying eyes of Los Santos City.

When they’re in an argument, however, Trevor does take a few liberties now and then to rile him up.

“Fine, Burger Shot it is. But when we get home, I want a blowjob.”

“Oh, Christ,” Michael groans, looking around to see how many people heard Trevor’s loud mouth.

Trevor grins. “Hopefully, I’ll be saying that soon too.”

F is for fights  [Do they bicker a lot? About trivial things? How do they make up after a large fight?]

They bicker a lot. About trivial things. About important things. About everything. But that’s them. It’s how it’s always been, and just because they’re in love, doesn’t mean it’s going to stop.

But, at least for Michael, he almost enjoys fighting with Trevor. Fighting with him only reminds him how much he’s devoted to the guy — how much he devastatingly loves the man.

With Amanda, they loved each other, but they weren’t in love with each other. So when they fought, it left him feeling bitter and lonely. But with Trevor, every fight is born out of caring about his relationship, about Trevor’s health, about their past, about their future. He just cares so violently — both of them do — that every fight starts and ends with him being in love. At least, for the most part.

G is for gifts [Do they give gifts often? Big things or small things?]

Yes, quite often. Michael is a lavish giver, even if he knows Trevor doesn’t really care one way or another about material possessions. If Michael can gift him an “Impotent Rage” comic because he used to have it as a child, even if it’s rare now and worth thousands, he’ll do it. He wants Trevor to have nice things, and he has no problem spending money in order to make that happen.

Trevor, on the opposite side, doesn’t give material gifts very often. Not really seeing the value for himself, he doesn’t much care to buy them for others either. Even so, that doesn’t mean he’s not a gift giver in his own way. Trevor will often show his giving side by actions: making sure the new movie Michael wanted to watch is rented when he comes home, cooking something for dinner (with no eyelids, he promises!), cleaning himself up, going to events he hates just because Michael loves them, and so on.

They have their own ways, and it works for them.

H is for home  [Where do they live? When did they move in together?]

They have several different residencies. Several.

After the divorce was finalized, Amanda moved out to leave for the beachfront property that she desperately craved — and asked for — all throughout their time in LS.

Michael kept the house in Rockford Hills and decided to stay there. Despite some gentle coaxing, Trevor refused to give up his trailer in Sandy Shores, but Michael was secretly happy since it gave them an excuse to drive up there and sit by the Alamo Sea.

Trevor also ended up keeping the Vanilla Unicorn, at least for the time being. Neither man makes too many appearances there anymore, but Trevor’s back office does make for a good bed if he’s mad at Michael.

Officially, though, they live in Michael’s place in Rockford Hills. It’s close to where they need to go, Michael can commute fairly easily to Solomon’s studio, and Trevor is at a perfect distance to wreck havoc in whatever part of the state he chooses day to day. Michael, in the future, would be happy to consider moving somewhere else with his partner. But right now, he’s just happy Trevor agreed to stay with him.

“T, you listening?”

“Huh? Yeah, Mikey. What is it?”

Michael grabs the remote out of the other man’s hand and forces his eyes to leave the TV. “Trevor, ‘m serious.”

“Okay, okay,” Trevor relents. “I’m all ears, pork chop.”

“How would you feel about staying here?”

“Well, considering I’ve already drove halfway across the city, drank a shit ton, and planned to strip you naked later, I’d say I feel pretty good about staying tonight.”

Michael smirks a little. “As sweet as that is, I meant more than just tonight. Like, ya know, stay. Live here.”

“Live here,” Trevor repeats slowly, his attention clearly on Michael completely now. “With you. In Rockford Hills. Here.”

“Yes,” Michael nods, but it comes out more like a question — not sure if Trevor really wants to live here with him.

“Okay,” Trevor agrees.

“Okay?”

“Yes. Okay.

The sides of Michael’s mouth tick up into a small smile. “Okay.”

I is for illness  [Do they care for each other when they’re sick?]

They’ll definitely care for each other no matter the illness, but their reactions certainly differ depending on the illness at hand.

If it’s the common cold, they’ll both gripe at each other about how “babyish” the other is being. That won’t stop them from picking up medicine, tissues, water, or anything else the other may need to feel better. Some playful banter is just to be expected.

If it’s a more “serious” sickness, a little bit lot more worry and anger is involved.

Trevor growls. “Fucking lay down. I told you smoking all those Redwoods would kill you one day.”

Michael follows his partner’s orders and leans back onto the bed, his mouth open, trying to breathe any air he can get without coughing. “I’m fine, asshole. ‘s just a bug.”

“It’s not just a bug,” Trevor huffs, laying down next to him. “Doctor said it’s bronchitis. That can be bad, Mikey.”

“I’ll be okay,” Michael mumbles, giving Trevor’s hand a squeeze to reassure him. “A lot of people get it.”

“A lot of people die from it, too. Especially if it’s chronic. More than 300 people.”

“That’s not a lot, T,” Michael reasons, shutting his eyes. “Mm, plus, doc said she doesn’t think it’s chronic.”

“Doesn’t think,” Trevor growls. “Fucking doctors. They don’t know shit until you’re dead.”

At that, Michael opens his eyes. “Calm down, T. It’s not that serious.”

“It is, Michael,” he says, spitting out his name. “I don’t want to lose your fat ass just because you can’t let go of your stupid habits, and the doctors in this city are too lazy to give a shit!”

Finally realizing the issue, Michael turns over in the bed to cuddle into Trevor’s side. “You won’t lose me, baby.”

“You don’t know that. I have before.”

“I know, and I’m sorry. But I’m here for the long haul now. You’re stuck with me.”

“Promise?”

“I promise.”

And when Michael stops smoking — for the most part — and convinces Trevor to try and get clean from the drugs — again, for the most part — he’s there with him every step of the way through the withdrawal symptoms.

The nightmares, lack of sleep, paranoia, irritability — all of it. Those months are probably the most Michael has ever cried, or seen Trevor cry, but it’s worth it in the end when they’re both a lot happier.

J is for jokes [Do they tease each other a lot? Do they have inside jokes nobody else gets?]

They definitely tease each other a lot. Sometimes, it’s hard to tell whether they’re teasing or bickering unless you really know them since most of their teasing is harsher words paired with playful undertones.

“I had an idea for our next anniversary.”

Trevor smirks. “Not sure if you’ll make it to our next anniversary, you fat fuck.”

Or

“Nice outfit, T. I can see you’re finally embracing the ‘I liked it before it was cool’ lifestyle.”

“Fuck off, Townley.”

K is for kisses [First kiss? Do they kiss a lot?]

Their first kiss was long ago, back in North Yankton. It was after one particularly good job in ‘86. They came away with more money than they’d ever gotten together, and it took them half the time it usually does to ward off police presence and make it back to their motel.

“Fuckin’ A,” Michael shouts as soon as the motel door is closed. “We did it!”

“Fuck yeah!”

Both boys laugh, their hearts still pumping with adrenaline. Suddenly, Michael is overcome by the excitement of the success of the job or the smile on Trevor’s face, and so he pushes him against the motel door and kisses him roughly.

The kiss only realistically lasts around five seconds, but it’s enough.

“What the fuck was that?” Trevor asks once they part.

“What?”

“You kissed me.”

Michael nods and shrugs a bit, trying not to blush. “Yeah, so what?”

Trevor doesn’t say anything. In fact, the room is deadly silent for several seconds before Trevor lunges forward and captures Michael’s mouth again.

Between then and the time he meets Amanda, Michael kisses Trevor a lot. If he’s being honest, he kisses Trevor a lot after he meets Amanda too.

When they officially reconcile their relationship and decide to give being together a real shot after the Union Depository job, they — of course — kiss a lot. They have to make up for lost time after all.

L is for love [Who said ‘I love you’ first? How do they show their love?]

Although Michael kissed him first, Trevor said “I love you” first. This, too, was back in North Yankton after a night full of celebratory drinking and sex after a big job.

However, after their reconciliation in 2013, Trevor, once again, was the one to take the lead. When it comes to emotions, Trevor’s always said exactly what he was thinking. Where Michael struggles with expressing himself, Trevor does nothing but express himself.

“What?”

Trevor shakes his head lightly at Michael’s questioning. “Nothing.”

“No, come on,” Michael pushes. “You’re lookin’ at me funny.”

“I’m not.”

“You are.”

Trevor sighs, glancing around the restaurant they’re currently sat in. “Can’t we eat?”

“You don’t want to tell me? When have you ever held your tongue? About literally anything?”

“Maybe I’m holding my tongue because I’m reluctant to say anything since last time I said it, it must have not meant shit because you married a stripper.”

“T, things with Amanda were complicated, you know that,” Michael says, grabbing his partner’s hand that’s resting on their table. “But it’s different now.”

Trevor gives a slight nod of agreement. “Yeah. It is.”

“So? What do you want to tell me?”

“I- I love you.”

Michael looks momentarily shocked, but he quickly recovers and breathes out a chuckle. “Oh.”

“You better say it back, Townley. You’re too old to have second thoughts.”

Despite Trevor’s quip, Michael grins. “I was just hoping I’d get to say it first this time. I love you too.”

M is for meals [Who cooks?]

Surprisingly, Trevor usually cooks. Or, rather, they do it together. Trevor likes the company, and Michael likes the assurance that no part of the food is human.

Trevor is a pretty good cook since he took care of his mom a lot when he was young between her copious amounts of “male friends.”

Although Michael usually is reluctant to relinquish control on a lot of things, he’s happy to sit back and watch Trevor cook, only helping when needed.

And if he gets to kiss the chef while he cooks, well, that’s just a bonus.

N is for nicknames [Do they shorten their names? Pet names?]

God, they never end — at least for Trevor. Michael does use the usual nicknames for his partner: T or Trev. After they started dating, “baby” will become a frequent contender.

For Trevor, he never stops coming up with nicknames — most of them being for his own amusement. Mikey, Mike, M, sugar, sugar tits, pork chop.

Some of them are more on-the-whim ideas: Mr. Plastic City and moneybags being quite popular.

Michael has asked Trevor to cool it down, but he doesn’t have much luck on that part.

“Get in, sugar tits.”

Michael climbs into the Bodhi, shooting Trevor a glare. “Can you stop calling me that?”

“I’m getting déjà vu. Thought we’ve had this conversation before, and I said no.”

“We have,” Michael rolls his eyes. “But I thought that once we, you know, started being together — you’d stop.”

“Aw,” Trevor smiles, linking their fingers together as he pulls out of the driveway. “No such luck, sugar tits.”

O is for outsiders [What do other people think about their relationship?]

Their relationship is a paradox to most — both surprising and not surprising in the slightest.

Amanda, who’s known them the longest outside of Lester, was initially shocked. With the way Michael talked about Trevor if she ever brought him up, it usually seemed like a one-sided friendship that was destined to end.

Though, when she looks back on it after the divorce, she’s not all that surprised after all.

“I should’ve known.”

Michael pauses before giving a half shrug to his soon-to-be ex wife. “I barely knew. It’s just always been … complicated.”

Amanda snorts. “Yeah, that’s one way to put it, Michael. Still, you just … never wanted to talk about him. Even after everything — especially not after everything.”

“I know, Mand.”

“I always thought that maybe it was just because you felt guilty, but, well,” she trails off. “You loved — love — him.”

“Yeah,” he breathes out. “Yeah, I do.”

Lester was even easier. He knew from beginning that the boys had a long history, and even after all the years apart, he knew the barely functioning friendship between Michael and Trevor was just years of pent up sexual tension, betrayals, and love waiting to topple over.

Franklin and Lamar were equally supportive, but Lamar did ask a lot of questions that made Franklin gently kick him under the table.

“Yo, so you and crazy dude are in love?” Lamar asks. “For real? This whole time?”

Michael glances at Franklin, who’s smirking at the exchange, before he meets Lamar’s eyes again and nods. “Yeah, we are.”

Lamar chuckles. “Good luck, homie. Bet that dude is into some freaky shit in bed.”

“What he means to say is that we’re happy for you, dog,” Franklin says while nudging Lamar. “Maybe now I won’t have to hear T bitch about you every time we grab a drink.”

“Yeah, doubtful,” Michael smirks. “I’m sure he’ll find somethin’ new to complain about.”

“Yeah, like how your ass is too fat to get in the sex swing I ordered.”

All three boys whip their heads around to see Trevor stalking up and plopping into the seat next to Michael.

“That’s not- he’s kidding,” Michael fumbles.

Franklin, looking caught between amusement and horror, just nods. “Sure, whatever you say, homie.”

P is for proposal [Who proposed first? How did they do it? A lot of planning?]

Michael proposed first. He values the traditional act of marriage a little more. Not to mention, Trevor didn’t want to ruin their relationship or scare Mike off since he only just got him back. If it was up to Trevor, though, they would have just got hitched immediately.

Although Michael considers himself a bit of a romantic with his partner — a cliché, in Trevor’s words — he didn’t plan a fancy proposal paired with dinner, a moonlit walk down Vespucci Beach, and skywriting asking the big question. No, instead, he just looked at Trevor one night and asked. He asked right then and there because, for once in his life, he just let his emotions take over.

“I understand how economics work and what the working class needs! They want a six pack of beer! An eager girl in their pickup truck! And a depressing folk tune playing on the radio!”

Michael faintly hears the voice of Impotent Rage coming from the TV in front of him, but he’s barely listening as his eyes keep glancing over at Trevor, who’s sitting next to him under their blanket, munching on a bowl of popcorn and watching the superhero chant with full attention.

A soft smile tugs at his lips as he listens to Trevor belt out a laugh at whatever’s happening in the show, and suddenly, he’s speaking without even realizing.

“T.”

“Hm?”

The man’s eyes don’t move from the television, so Michael tries again. “Trevor.”

Finally, his partner’s eyes peel away from the screen and look his way. “What, Mikey? I’m missing good TV here.”

Michael watches him for several seconds, the small smile from before still present. “Marry me.”

At that, the show fades into the background completely, and Trevor’s attention is focused. “You’re gonna have to repeat that, sugar. Think I misheard you.”

“I said, ‘Marry me.’”

“Jesus,” Trevor shuts the TV off and turns to face Michael, the blanket falling off them to their feet. “You serious? You better not be fucking with me.”

“I’m not,” Michael shakes his head, taking Trevor’s hands in his. “We should do it. Get married.”

There’s a long gap of silence where Michael’s not sure if Trevor’s going to laugh at him, punch him, or have another overt reaction. But in the end, he feels his partner’s body slam into his as they topple over onto the couch. And it takes a few seconds for it to register that Trevor is hugging him.

Michael laughs. “Is this a yes?”

“Fuck yes.”

And if Trevor cried a little too that night, well, that’s their business.

Q is for quest [Have they ever been on a quest together? Has one done something completely crazy for the other?]

Honestly, their whole lives together have been nothing but a series of quests. But, outside of the normal robbery, revenge, avoid-dying quests, they’ll absolutely go on day-to-day missions for the other — especially Trevor.

Is Michael out of that one specific product he uses for his hair and no store in Los Santos seems to carry it? Trevor will find it.

Have one of the actors on set gone missing? Trevor’s already got their location.

It doesn’t matter how utterly dumb he thinks Michael is for caring about certain things, he’ll get it done. Somehow, some way.

“You’re welcome,” Trevor says, sitting down the black, sleek bottle on the kitchen counter. “Only one I could find, Mr. Suede Bucks.”

“You got the cologne? The fuck did you find this? It ain’t been at Ponsonbys forever.”

Trevor leans down and kisses Michael, smiling proudly. “I know. It wasn’t easy.”

“Yeah, I bet, it wa-” Michael stops. “Uh, Trev?”

Trevor walks over to the fridge and pulls out a beer. “Yeah?”

Michael wipes at the bottle before holding up a red-coated finger to Trevor. “Is this blood?”

Trevor pretends to inspect it before shrugging. “Not sure.”

“Oh, really? This just happened to be here?”

“Don’t ask too many questions, Mikey. Just accept the gift.”

“I didn’t want it that bad,” Michael protests. “Not at some poor bastard’s expense.”

“I got you the cologne,” Trevor says pointedly. “Just be happy, you miserable fuck.”

Rolling his eyes, Michael smiles and leans up to connect their lips again. “Well, thank you.”

R is for rainy day [What do they do when it’s raining outside?]

What better way to spend a rainy day than a movie session that your boyfriend forces you into? Right?

Michael loves to watch movies — that much is obvious. And, since Trevor loves him, he’ll indulge him on days where it’s too wet to do anything else.

Plus, a bonus of staying indoors all day is more time for … extracurricular activities.

S is for secrets [Do they keep secrets from each other?]

Trevor’s not the type to keep secrets, so anything he does, says, or thinks pretty much goes straight to Michael.

For Mike, though, he has trouble not keeping secrets. It’s not that he actively wants to lie to people, especially those he loves, but he’s done it for so long that it’s become second nature. So much so that he even expressed the worry to his new therapist.

“I don’t want to lie to anyone, ‘specially not Trevor,” Michael admits. “But it’s like I don’t know how to stop!”

“What exactly do you lie about?”

He glances around the office, shrugging. “I don’t know. The way I feel sometimes. What I want. What I don’t want. Christ, I don’t know if I’m lying or if I just don’t know the answers.”

“I think you know the answers, Michael.”

“Maybe. I just … don’t ever want to hurt Trevor again.”

Months in therapy with an actual qualified doctor — unlike Dr. Friedlander — helped Michael find new ways to cope with his knee jerk reaction to lie.

So, no, they both try not to keep anymore secrets between the two of them.

T is for travelling [Do they go on holiday together? On journeys?]

They don’t get away very often. It’s not that they don’t have the money because obviously they do. But they’re busy with their respective jobs. Michael is often working on a movie set these days, and that can take up a lot of time. And Trevor can be found running TPI, the Vanilla Unicorn, and — of course — getting up to various shenanigans.

In a last ditch effort to connect to his kids, he did invite them on a small trip, where they ended up going to the zoo alongside Trevor.

“Ew, daddy, what is that?”

Before Michael can answer Tracey’s question, he sees her reach out toward the animal. “Trace! Don’t fuckin’ touch it!”

“Hey, you better watch out, kid, or it’ll eat you,” Trevor says, putting his arm around Tracey.

“You’d save her, uncle T,” Jimmy pipes up.

Trevor smirks. “We’d just sacrifice your dad. He’d take one for the team.”

Tracey giggles, nodding. “Totes.”

Michael pulls Trevor’s arm off of Tracey before giving him a playful shove. “Yeah, fuck you. If anything, we’d sacrifice your ass. With the way you smell, it’d probably think you’re a dead animal anyway.”

“As if you’d give me up that easily,” Trevor says, brushing their hands together as they walk along the zoo path. “You love me, Michael Townley.”

“Yeah, yeah.”

Besides that, they mostly stick with San Andreas. But Michael’s been thinking about planning a trip back to North Yankton. He knows Trevor misses the Midwest, and he thinks they’re grown enough now in their relationship to relive nostalgic, good memories while there instead of being thrown back into painful ones.

U is for urges [Do they pine after each other? How often to they think about each other?]

They do pine — in their own ways. For Trevor, it’s more blatant, obvious longing.

Before getting together officially, Trevor made it a point to drudge up the past or make snippy comments about how much Michael’s changed. Under all the semi-faux anger, all he wanted was for Michael to realize how much he’s missed him.

As for Michael himself, his pining came in the form of silence. He didn’t want to ever talk about Trevor, or hear about him, or think about him. He missed him too, but every thought surrounding the man was laced with guilt.

“We did it, T!” Michael cheers. “Fuckin’ A. Pulled off the Big One.”

“Sure did, Mikey,” Trevor smiles slightly as he whips the car down the LS Freeway. “Never thought I’d see the day.”

“I know. I figured we’d be settling into prison by now if we ever attempted it. I mean, we-”

“No,” Trevor stops him. “Never thought I’d see the day since you were dead.”

The air in the car grows thicker than it usually does with Trevor’s quips as Michael struggles with how to respond.

Eventually, Michael sighs. “Thought you said we were good.”

“We are.”

“Then why do you have to bring it up? Can’t we have one decent conversation without you always having to mention it? Jesus Christ, T.”

Trevor grinds his teeth, facing Michael with an accusatory finger as the car comes to a stop on the side of the road. “Fuck you! I’m going to bring it up until you’re so sick and tired of hearing about it that you rip your own ears off!”

“Oh, well, if I’d known that was all it’d take to shut your ass up, I would’ve ripped ‘em off months ago!”

“Good! I wish you fucking would!”

Both of them lean back into the silence as Trevor slams on the gas and buzzes past the cars around them.

After pulling into his driveway, Michael gets out and slams the door behind him, leaving Trevor in the car without another word. He slowly starts the trek up to his door, suddenly realizing that — once the door shuts — he’s going to be alone once again.

Chancing a look back, he checks to see if Trevor’s still sitting in the car, and he is — unmoving.

Michael turns around and makes his way to the window, not even having to knock before Trevor’s rolling it down.

Michael gestures vaguely. “Want to come in?”

Trevor gives a curt nod and moves to get out of the car. “You better have beer.”

After popping open a few drinks and settling onto the couch, Trevor’s voice fills the otherwise quiet room. “Look, ‘m sorry. Okay? I know we’re trying to move on. But fuck, Michael. It’s hard. You … you left me, and you didn’t even think twice.”

“Didn’t think twice? You kidding me? I thought twice. I thought three times, four times, a hundred times. But I had a family, and I didn’t know what else to do. I messed up. I know that. And I’ve had to live with that every day. Every day, I thought about you — hoped that you weren’t dead, or when I was really fuckin’ depressed, hoped that you were so I didn’t have to feel so damn guilty. So don’t tell me that I didn’t think twice, asshole.”

Seconds later, the air is knocked out of Michael as Trevor pushes his lips roughly against his. He lets out a small hiss when he feels Trevor bite down on his bottom lip before his tongue brushes against his.

“I’ve missed you,” Michael breathes out against Trevor’s lips.

“I’ve missed you too, sugar.”

V is for virtues [What’s their favourite thing about each other?]

Trevor loves that Michael is, well, Michael. Despite the long list of qualities he could ramble off that he doesn’t like about him: constant sarcasm, hypocritical, arrogant …

He’s also fond of those qualities because that’s who Michael is. He’s an asshole, and Trevor likes him that way. Secretly.

Michael, on the other hand, has a distinct quality of Trevor that he’s most fond of — loyalty. Michael himself has never been loyal. He’s cheated, lied, hurt, coerced, and backstabbed almost everyone he’s ever known. Although Trevor’s physically hurt his fair share of people, his loyalty to his friends is unshakable.

Michael almost hates that about him too. He’ll often wish Trevor gave less of a shit about him because, maybe then, their past wouldn’t cut as deep.

Still, Michael will hold tightly on to every last bit of loyalty Trevor’s willing to give him now.

W is for wedding [Who plans it? Big or small? Does it go smooth?]

It’s a pretty small event considering Michael’s already done the whole marriage thing before. Neither of them really care about a monumental party paired with dancing, catering, and people galore. They really only want to get hitched for the sake of being together forever and, as Trevor jokes, so it’s practically legally required for them to love one another.

Does it go smooth? Ha! If you asked anyone — anyone — that they know if anything ever has gone smooth when it comes to Michael and Trevor, they’d laugh.

It wasn’t a total disaster or anything, but there were certainly hiccups along the way.

“The fuck do you mean he’s missing?” Michael pulls the phone away from his ear as the lady on the other end tries to explain the whereabouts of his suit tailor. “Trevor!”

“But I assure you that we’re trying to find him, Mr. De Santa.”

Michael barely catches the end of what she’s saying as he pushes the phone back against his ear. “Look, lady. I don’t give a shit where your boss is. Do you have my suit?”

“We don’t have it here with us,” she explains. “He likely took it home, but I assure you-”

Michael hangs up the phone as Trevor finally comes strutting into the kitchen.

“What’s up, pork chop? Trouble at the studio?”

“No, trouble with the suit guy. Apparently, he’s gone missing.”

“Huh.”

Michael narrows his eyes. “That was a short answer. And ya don’t seem that shocked.”

“It’s Los Santos,” Trevor shrugs. “People go missing all the time. He probably found the one hot broad in this city that likes 50-year-old men with braces and hit the road with her.”

“How did you know he had braces? I’ve never hold you that.”

“What the fuck is this, Mikey? An interrogation?”

Michael steps around the kitchen table until he’s face to face with his partner, giving him a sharp, piercing look. “Trevor.”

“Fine! I met the guy for a bit,” Trevor relents. “Went to talk to him about fixing up my outfit as well, but we didn’t see eye to eye.”

“Oh, God. What does that mean?”

Trevor’s eyes shine in light amusement. “I think we’re going to have to look for someone else.”

X is for xenia [What’s it like to be their guest?]

Well, they don’t really have a lot of people over. The only people who ever visit them are Franklin and Lamar, sometimes Tracey and Jimmy, and on the rarest occasions, Lester. But that’s usually only if he needs something.

When they’re in Sandy Shores, they’ll have Ron over, and occasionally, they’ll bring Wade when Trevor wants to get him out of the strip club.

Being their guest is like going to a haunted house. It can be fun, but you have a chance of getting traumatized in some way.

“Hey, do y’all two have any-” Franklin stops, throwing his hands over his eyes as he jumps back into the hallway. “What the fuck?”

Trevor’s laughter fills in the room as Michael blushes, fumbling for the zipper on his pants before pulling Trevor up from his knees.

“Fuck,” Michael starts. “Sorry. We ain’t doing anything. I promise.”

“Yeah, whatever you say, dog,” Franklin shudders, finally peaking through his fingers. “Look, I just came to ask if y’all had any beer. But I can see you’re busy.”

“We weren’t …” Michael trails off, knowing there’s no point in denying it. “I’ll show you where it is.”

The three boys walk downstairs, Trevor still snickering to himself as Michael nudges him every so often to try and get him to quit.

“Maybe next time, wait for your guests to leave before you start messing around up there,” Franklin chuckles.

The boys’ heads glance over when Lamar pipes up beside them, apparently catching the end of the conversation. “Yo, you and crazy dude was fuckin’ up there?”

“Kill me,” Michael mumbles while Trevor cackles beside him.

Yeah, they don’t have guests over very often anymore.

Y is for yearly [Any traditions? Anniversaries?]

They’ve picked up some new traditions and brought back some old. Back in North Yankton, before Michael ever met Amanda, there were several years that he and Trevor would bake holiday cookies for Christmas. Were they good at it? No. But that never stopped them. Neither of them grew up in particularly warm households, so it was up to them to create some kind of holiday cheer.

Plus, when Tracey was born, she loved to help out. Oftentimes, you could find her in Trevor’s arms as they used cookie cutters to make the dough into little trees and reindeer.

Deciding to carry that tradition into their relationship and marriage, every Christmas they bake cookies, and every year, they taste a little like shit. But they both love it.

“Merry Christmas, daddy,” Tracey says, hugging Michael and Trevor. “Merry Christmas, uncle T.”

“Merry Christmas, kid,” Trevor pats her back before going to grab a few of the supplies needed for the recipe they’re making.

Michael hands her a bowl for the dough. “Merry Christmas, Trace. Glad you could come over. How’s college going?”

“Good! Classes, like, totally rock!”

He smiles, nodding approvingly. “Good.”

“What about your brother? He too good to hang out with us tonight?” Trevor jokes, setting the butter, milk, and eggs down on to the table.

Tracey giggles. “I think he’s working.”

“I’m still not used to hearing that,” Michael laughs. “What about your mom?”

“She’s good too. She’s, and I quote, ‘finally relaxed now that you’re someone else’s problem.’”

Trevor snorts. “Ain’t that the truth.”

“You wouldn’t want it any other way,” Michael shoves him lightly.

“Maybe not.”

Michael, Trevor, and Tracey work in unison for the next 20 minutes until they finally have some semi-decent cookies that are ready to be baked. Sticking them in the oven and setting a timer, they all get cleaned up and move to the living room.

Michael flops down onto the couch, and Trevor falls next to him, putting his arm around his shoulders. Tracey makes her way to the other side of the couch so she can stretch her legs as they all wait for the cookies to be done.

“We should make this a tradition again! Now that you and daddy are together, we could do this, like, every year. Remember when we used to do this when I was young, uncle T?”

“Sure do, kiddo,” Trevor grins. “With Jimmy too.”

She shrugs. “Yeah, I guess he could even come next year. What do you think?”

Michael sees that Tracey and Trevor are looking at him for an answer, so he nods. “Yeah, we could probably make that happen.”

The three of them talk about the future, Tracey mostly supplying the conversation with her babbling while Michael and Trevor happily sit back, leaning into each other as they listen.

When it comes to anniversaries, they also celebrate those every year. They’re not as uptight as some couples about them, but they tend to mean a lot to Trevor, and it’s a concrete way for Michael to show that he’s putting work into their relationship and cares about it enough to do so. So, they celebrate them every year.

Z is for Zzz [Sleep habits? Who’s the big spoon? What do they wear in bed? Are they coddlers?]

Michael’s never really gotten a perfect night’s rest — not since he was a baby presumably. He’s had okay nights and even, what he’d consider, good nights. But never perfect. Never the full eight hours of uninterrupted sleep.

Nightmares often plague his nighttime life. When he was a teen, it used to be flashes of his father hitting him — beating him black and blue until he was coughing blood days after. As a young adult, he dreamt of robberies gone wrong, getting shot, going to prison, and so on. As an older man, his dreams are a toss-up between his past worries and his future ones. Hurting Trevor, dying, or, most often, both.

Trevor, in the past, didn’t sleep a lot either. Some nightmares, sure, but mostly from the drugs coursing through his veins at any given time. Since Michael and him got together and he started working on being clean, he’s gotten a bit more sleep than the usual.

The same can be said for Michael, though. Sleeping next to Trevor has helped tremendously, especially for his Trevor-themed nightmares. Knowing he’ll wake up next to the man is comforting.

Because of their shaky sleep schedule, they both take turns being the big spoon/little spoon depending on who needs what.

Trevor gently nudges Michael, who’s restlessly tossing around. “Mikey … Mikey.”

Michael’s eyes fly open, and Trevor grabs his arms to stop them from reaching for the gun by the bed.

The dark room stays silent for a minute as Michael’s breathing levels out before he sighs. “Sorry. Did I wake you up?”

Trevor gives a noncommittal hum. “You haven’t had a dream like that in awhile.”

“Yeah, we’ve been sleepin’ good recently, huh?”

Trevor puts his arms around Michael, feeling his bare chest rise and fall steadily. “Yeah, sure have. What were you dreamin’ about?”

“Just … North Yankton,” Michael admits, pulling Trevor close. “Being back there — what could have happened, I guess.”

“There’s no use thinking about the past since we can’t change it. Ain’t that what your new shrink said?”

“She said I should let it go,” he corrects. “But I can’t.”

Trevor frowns, tracing circles on Michael’s chest. “Why not? Still sad you missed your opportunity to put me down?

“Knock it off,” Michael grabs his hand, scratching where Trevor was lightly brushing before. “And that ain’t funny, T.”

Trevor rolls his eyes but decides not to push it. “Look, sugar, we all have things we regret. But we’re here now, and that’s what matters, right? We’ve got your spoiled kids, Franklin, Lamar, hell, even Lester. We’re good.”

“I know,” Michael says quietly, agreeing. “I really am sorry, though. For a lot shit.”

“Yeah, me too. For a lot of shit.”

Michael leans down and kisses Trevor’s head before pulling the blankets up over them again and going back to sleep.

When they can’t sleep, it’s usually filled with just that — banter, soft comforts, and an insult or two so the other can feel right at home. It’s not always picture perfect, but they wouldn’t trade it for anything else.

[simslegacy5083]

Not So Berry (Straud Descendants) Gen 9

Today's (9/6/2024) Episode: Mr. and Mrs.

Following their reception Luigi brought the Missus to a lounge on Mua Pel’am Island for a nightcap to start their intimate afterparty.

“Yeah, Dad’s feast was tasty, but did you see their faces when we started the dance? Worth all the practice to be sure, I mean I loved practicing too…”

Fortunately for the rapidly backtracking groom, a fan approached “Cyber Lu”, interrupting their conversation by begging for an autograph. While the self-centered star happily provided a personalized headshot for the excited young lady, Noemi sipped her drink with a self-satisfied smile.

He got so adorably thrilled by the attention, and his fans never bothered her. Well worth sending out a quick anonymous Luigi sighting via text. 

When the hubbub died down and their drinks were gone, Luigi grabbed Noemi’s hand, pulling her up to face him “So, Mrs. Lawbourne, are you ready for me to show you the real reason I brought you all the way out here?”

Judging by the look on his face Noemi decided she had a really good feeling about whatever he had up his sleeve “Oh, this sounds interesting” she replied, matching his excited grin with one of her own “lead on, Mr. Lawbourne”

So late at night, they met no other sims on the winding sandy path leading up to a large misty waterfall.

“Papa used to love bringing me here when I was a kid,” Luigi said over the soft roar of the falls. “He’d pack a lunch and we’d spend hours eating and splashing around. However, apparently, there’s a little crystal cave tucked away back there that’s famous as a venue for more “adult” rendezvous…”

At the suggestive waggle of his eyebrows she teased: “Are you sure we’re not being observed? We were just accosted by one of your fangirls.”

Luigi made a big show of looking over his shoulder and then carefully checking behind nearby rocks and bushes before tiptoeing back over to her and whispering: “It’s all good, I think we’re alone now” before pulling his squealing bride into the intimate gloom behind the curtain of falling water.

“Well worth it’s reputation!” Noemi said when they emerged sometime later “Reminded me of the best parts of that grotto where you proposed.”

“I’m glad you liked it” he replied “Now, as much as I’d love to stay and explore, I think we’d better get home and finish getting ready for our trip. We have a big day ahead of us tomorrow.”

“If we must… but first, get over here” she teased “I think I forgot a little something I wanted to do in there when you distracted me.”

Back home, the couple temporarily split up. While Noemi did some last-minute honeymoon packing, Luigi uploaded the video footage from the wedding onto his fancy new video editing station and started some quick revisions.

He quickly found the large, specialized workstation much easier to use than his laptop. As he put the finishing touches on a quick promotional clip, he made a mental note to see what upgrades he could make to their everyday computer setups when they got back from their trip.

He’d maxed his programming skill ages ago and could overclock any PC easily. In addition, a full size, ergonomically correct, desktop system would help keep his carpel tunnel at bay. They were developing his videogame on a laptop and a tablet for crying out loud! “It’s settled… when I get back, we’re getting new computers - no excuses!” he declared to the empty studio before finishing up and heading off in search of his wife.

Luigi found Noemi in the bedroom, waiting for him once again, in an outfit he hadn’t seen her wear since before she got pregnant.

“I hope you haven’t hurt yourself again” she said, “because that would be very inconvenient.” Her crop leapt up to press his lips together before he could respond, leaving him to shake his head silently.

“Good boy. Now, to have a nice night, you’ll want to go put on the little present I left on your bedside table, and keep that pretty mouth closed until I tell you what to do with it. Understood?” Luigi nodded again, eager to see what his mistress had in mind to cap off their wedding night in style.

After “round two” the pair finally drifted off to catch a couple hours shut eye before catching the teleport to their honeymoon destination.

As he snuggled his wife close Luigi dreamed of their upcoming adventure. They’d talked about how much fun it would be to visit the park when they’d been “just friends” back in college and now they’d finally be doing it as husband and wife. He couldn’t wait to get started.

View The Full Story of My Not So Berry Challenge Here

[analogskullerosis]

Thoughts on the Doom Patrol Finale

"It's okay. I made it home."

I thought the finale was wonderful. It was a perfect send off for the show and I think all the main characters got a good conclusion to their stories, even if I think some had bigger flaws than others. I think the show came full circle and did exactly what it wanted to do. While I would've liked to have seen a fifth season, I'm satisfied with what's here. I would say the theme for the final episode of Doom Patrol revolved around "breaking the cycle" and realizing that the only way things get better is by embracing change and to stop running around in circles. Let go of your worries and just be what you're meant to be.

Vic's ending was simple but sweet. The entire show he's been struggling to find his purpose and how he can help people in a way that isn't joining the Justice League or being a comic book superhero like Batman or Superman. Becoming a teacher with Derrick for the next generation of students pave the way and teach them valuable skills via robotics and prosthetics work (which Vic's Cyborg parts basically are) felt like the best ending for him. He wanted to be a hero and he is, it's just in the more subtle, usually unspoken/unthanked way that teachers can be viewed as "heroes".

Rita's death was sad, but necessary in order to help the rest of the team move on to their final destinies. It's often said that mothers (or grandmothers, in Old!Rita's case) are what keep families together. With her death, the Doom Patrol also died with her. She died beloved and with her family by her side... although she was embarrassed that her family only seemed to think of her by bringing her favorite alcohol... and her body blobbed up and popped like a slime balloon afterwards... But being reunited with Malcolm in the afterlife was a lovely conclusion for her. Being reunited with her lost love in a garden felt like something out of an old movie. Perfect for Miss. Rita Farr. The rest of the team paying tribute to her and watching her movie Secret Rendezvous was a lovely way to remember her. Their Lovely Rita died a star.

Speaking of dying as a star, Larry! Larry went nuclear!! Him flying into the sun during the Bad!Future at the beginning of the season was wild, his future with Rama here at the end was beautiful and it was the ending Larry deserved. He broke the cycle by not having Rama be the same "What If?" that John Bowers had been. He freed himself and was able to truly love without fear or hesitation again. Turning into a bright star in space was perfect for Larry because the entire show he had been introverted and shy and reserved. He made it a point to hide for as long as he could and never let anybody see him. His journey was all about a man embracing the things that make him who he is and to let the world see him in his glory, no matter what they think. Joining with Rama in space and becoming a star (which is how I interpreted their joining to signify) means that for the next couple thousand years, Larry can be seen shining bright in the night sky, whether people like it or not.

Jane becoming Kay again (or simplty, K., as Vic suggested) was the ultimate win. The underground was destroyed and K. found her peace. Her going to space with someone who she could find comfort in and explore with was a lovely ending for her. She wanted to leave Doom Manor and explore the world, now she can. Admittedly, I wish her relationship with Casey Brinke would've had more time devoted to it, but it's not a pairing I mind. As much as I wish she could've found her way back to Shelley Byron, I suppose I treat Shelley as an unreachable fantasy (she is fog, after all) whose role was not so much to be an endgame romantic partner to her, but to be a guiding hand and help Jane/K. begin to become comfortable in her body and sexuality again and ultimately help her reach her ending. Her conclusion had flaws, but her journey was still very very satisfying and I can be happy with her having Casey Brinke, her painting, a ship with a view, and a nice cat (so long as Casey doesn't... you know.) Her ending felt like it answered the ending Grant Morrison gave her after their run of the comics. "There is another world. There is a better world. Well... there must be." The show's answer is, "Yes, there is. She found it."

Laura's ending was my second least favorite (next to Dorothy, who just flat out fucking disappeared!!!) and I wish she had gotten a little more, but I got to see Michelle Gomez wield a flamethrower and smile bigger than a child on Christmas Day, so I can't be too mad about it. If you believe in fire as a thing that cleanses things and allows people to start over, Laura's ending worked for her character. The place that really and truly broke her is about to be violently burned down. A woman like her needed violence to heal her and I think burning down the Ant Farm was just that.

Cliff's ending was the one that got me the most. "I thought I came home to live, but I think I came home just to die." The gift that Isabel/Immortus gave him was a sweet gift. He gets to see the cycle be broken right before his very eyes. He gets to see Rory's whole life play out and while you fear he's repeating his grandfather's actions, those fears are quickly put to bed when you see that he's perfectly fine and everything works out. He doesn't become RJ Steele, he doesn't fall into the same traps and vices that hurt Cliff Steele, he becomes a different man. Rory Steele is there for Clara Steele and he gets to meet his own grandson as a flawed, but supportive and good man. When Cliff powers down and it hangs on that shot of Cliff's robot face, I broke. The journey is completed. Cliff was in an accident and spent the whole series trying to get home. He did just that. It was the most beautiful way Cliff Steele's story could've ended. I loved every minute of it.

I was happy that the Immortus plot and the Butts plot was wrapped up in about five minutes with no explanation. It didn't need one. This show was never about them. It was a show about a bunch of misfit-assholes-turned-superpowered-weirdos who had to learn to care for one another, helping each other guide through trauma and pain and become better people at the end of it. They did just that. Larry was right: every single threat the team dealt with was created by them in some way. If there's no Doom Patrol, then the world is safe for another day. The only way this all ends is by the Doom Patrol disbanding for good. If you view Doom Manor as one giant therapy/rehabilitation retreat, then all of the members of the manor were stamped and cleared to leave. They left and they all found their own happiness, happiness that would be strange and weird and nonsensical if it was any show other than Doom Patrol. In the end, the cycle was broken and the characters became free to explore the world beyond the manor. No more chaos, no more fear, only peace.

The only cycle that never seems to break is the one where the Doom Patrol dies at the end of almost every iteration of the comics... until some weirdo (Grant Morrison, Rachel Pollack, Gerard Way, etc.) comes along and resurrects them, brings them back to life. I suspect the Doom Patrol will go through that cycle again. They will die, the team will be disbanded and gone for a while, then some weirdo will lovingly make up some way to get them all together again. It doesn't have to make perfect sense, just so long as they're all together again somehow.

There's so much more to say, but I'll leave it with this for now: Doom Patrol has become one of my favorite shows of all time. It's hilariously ridiculous, wonderfully weird, delightfully strange, and the most beautifully human show about superpowered misfits coming together and helping each other find brighter days after experiencing nothing but the darkest ones. They're my new go-to example of what a found family should be and I think the finale was satisfying. I think the show wrapped up the best way that it could've and I think every person that had the pleasure of working on it should be proud of what they've unleashed onto the world.

Long live the Doom Patrol.

[photogirl894]

Hiii, it is the first time that I write on request, by the way, I love your work. 🥺💗

Could you please do a Wrecker × F!Reader with these prompts from your list?

"Playing with someone's hair" and "Cuddle up together" BUT, in Pabu ♡

(and if this fact is necessary, I have short curly hair and dyed blonde)

I just watched the episode and I can't get you out of my head; the idea of ​​living in that beautiful place and being the romantic interest of the Wrecker.

My big boy deserves a lot of love ♡✨️

And sorry if i have mistakes, english is not my first language.

Thank u 💕✨️

Hey there, my friend! I'm so happy you're here! And thank you, you're so sweet 😊

I would be happy to do this request for you! Sorry it's taken me a while! And you're right, the big guy deserves all the love! I hope you enjoy this!

"At Sunset"

15. Playing with someone’s hair

29. Cuddled up together 

Pairing: Wrecker x fem reader

***

Ever since Phee had brought the Clones with her to Pabu, they'd become a great help to the island, especially with rebuilding after the tsunami that had taken place.

Though, the biggest of the bunch, Wrecker, had caught your attention. He'd helped you put your home back together and he was extremely kind and supportive. You loved it when he smiled at you; his smile was like the purest ray of Pabu sunshine that brought you comforting, all-encompassing warmth. He was a complete sweetheart...and admittedly, you were sad when your home was completed. You wanted to keep seeing him, but no longer had an excuse to. He got roped into helping with other things around the island pretty quickly and you went from seeing him almost every day to barely seeing him in passing maybe every other day. You missed him a lot, which made you realize you'd fallen harder for him than you thought. You weren't sure if he felt remotely the same. He was helping everyone and was just as kind to each person on Pabu; he was probably friendly to everyone he met. Every once in a while, it seemed like there were some lingering glances between you two, but it was most likely nothing. You felt it was best not to get your hopes up for anything, especially if he and his brothers weren't staying permanently.

As you were finishing up some shopping one day, you heard a small voice call out your name. When you looked in the direction it had come from, you saw Lyanna, the mayor's daughter, and Omega, Wrecker's sister, running towards you, both with big, bright smiles on their face.

"Hello, girls," you greeted them as they stopped in front of you.

"We have a message for you!" exclaimed Lyanna.

"From Wrecker!" added Omega excitedly.

Your heart jumped into your throat. "From...Wrecker?" you repeated. "What is it?"

Both girls exchanged giddy grins before Lyanna informed you, "He wants you to meet him tonight at the docks at sunset."

"He was very specific about it being at sunset," Omega said.

Sunset...that was your favorite time of day because you loved watching the sun go down on the horizon and the beautiful colors that painted the sky. You had once mentioned that to Wrecker in passing. Had he remembered? No, more than likely it was probably just the easiest time to meet. Even still, though, it was nice that he wanted to meet with you.

"Thank you for passing along the message. Tell him I'll be there," you told the girls.

The two of them just giggled in reply and then ran off. Something was going on with those two...and you were now even more curious about your upcoming rendezvous with Wrecker.

***

Before you left your house, you filled up a basket full of Pabu's various fruits, knowing how much Wrecker loved them. You had put on your favorite dress and even put a little extra curl in your hair just so you at least looked nice, even though you didn't know what was going to happen. You were just going to see Wrecker and that was good enough for you. You made your way down the island to the dock and found he was already there waiting for you. He spotted you out of the corner of his eye and looked your way.

"There you are!" he cried out gladly.

There it was again, that bright smile on his face that put even the glowing sunset to shame and it was all for you. Shyly, you waved and went over to him.

"What's in the basket?" he asked.

You lifted the cloth you had over it and showed him. "A little surprise for you," you said.

His face lit up even more. "You're the best!" he cried.

"I try," you said, tucking some hair behind your ear.

That action made him notice your hair and he reached up, tenderly running his fingers through it. "You curled your hair. It looks so nice," he complimented you. Then his eyes wandered down to your dress and he stepped back, taking your hands in his as he exclaimed, "And your dress...you look so pretty, (Y/N)! I mean, you always look pretty, but right now, you look breathtaking!"

Your jaw dropped in happy disbelief. Where was all this coming from? Not that you were complaining, of course.

"I'm glad you came," he said, still holding your hands. His expression softened to perhaps he most gentle, caring look you'd ever seen from him. "You'd said before that you loved the sunset, so I thought this would be a great time to see you."

"You...you remembered," you said, even more shocked.

"Yeah, I did," he replied. "I wanted to see you tonight because I've missed you and not seeing you every day made me realize that I like you a lot. I want to spend more time with you and get to know you more, if that's okay with you."

You couldn't believe what you were hearing and a joyful cry escaped you. "Wrecker...I would love that more than anything!" you cried. "I really like you, too, and I've missed you."

Wrecker's happy smile returned at hearing that you felt the same about him and he led you over to the edge of the dock, still holding your hand. "I thought we could watch the sunset together," he said.

"That sounds perfect," you said back as you both sat down.

You sat down beside him and wasted no time in cuddling up next to him. He reacted the way you'd hoped and wrapped one of his arms around your shoulders, pulling you closer. You pulled out one of the fruits from your basket and gave it to him, which he took with his free hand and ate as the two of you watched the sun go down, illuminating the sky with a variety of colors.

Then you glanced up at him as he kept watching the sun and you couldn't hold back a smile. Wrecker had the same feelings towards you as you did him and he was there with you, having remembered that you loved sunsets. He was very attentive and that was quite an attractive quality to you. This was the happiest you'd felt in a long time.

You turned back to watch the sun and a few seconds later, you felt his lips on your cheek. When you looked up at him, he had a shy look on his face.

"You missed," you told him.

His head tilted curiously. "What...what do you mean?" he asked, confused.

Then you reached up, took the back of his head and guided him down until your lips met in a gentle kiss.

When you pulled back, his smile widened even more. "Ohhh, now I get it," he stated.

You giggled at him and he came forward and kissed you yet again, making you feel warmer and more content than any Pabu sunset ever had before.

Photogirl894's Physical Affection prompts

Photogirl894's 1,000 Followers fics

[thatgirl4815]

I found it hilarious that Jojo has been loosely touting a Taylor Swift parallel when it comes to Mew and his relationship with Top (and it's obviously a surface level joke) but if you actually listen to the songs in Reputation and Lover...the storytelling is 100% Ray. It's finding love at your lowest. The self-loathing, seeking love as salvation, blowing up good things in fear and realizing too late, secret rendezvous where neither knows what game is really being played, finding their purported last love in a world that hated them--who is all of these things but Ray?

The Taylor Swift thing is mostly just an entertaining observation for me but the thing that the thematic elements and imagery in her music prompted me to re-think was that famous final scene in episode 10. While you watch Ray's eyes morph the therapist into Sand, there's a stoic golden glow to imaginary-Sand as he sits in the therapist's chair like a throne, as though you've walked into a temple dedicated to him--a temple Ray has dedicated to him. It's almost like Ray has always seen Sand as a god.

Throughout the confession that follows, Imaginary-Sand is mostly emotionless, minimally responding to Ray as Ray maintains an incredibly reverent face despite breaking down in tears. The apology contains so many reused phrases as though Ray were reciting some sort of prayer, and even while sitting in the sofa, the camera kind of points up at Sand rather than at the even level he is really at when you see things through Ray's vision. Finally, when Ray gets on his knees and imaginary-Sand appears to console him, it's not clearly romantic or friendly. There's a godliness to it. The point is, the whole thing just felt akin to a religious awakening to me. And then I realized I felt those same feelings emanating from Ray in the caravan, in the music room, at the party, drunk in the parking lot, on the rooftop, in the kitchen(s), when they wake up together for the first time...

I don't know what this means for the relationship Ray and Sand have and whether it will ever really be healthy, but it certainly made for poetic cinema. Has Sand eclipsed the unattainable Mew? Has he become the unconditional heavenly father (I say, mostly in jest)? Another point of consideration is that Ray always seems to be wearing a cross. Just saying.

Anyway this theory is pretty out there, and in any case, it's less about proving the idea and more about seeing what others thought about it as a vantage point of discussion, and whether it colors how Ray, and Sand and Ray as a couple, are interpreted.

Those are such great observations! Taylor Swift's lyricism is so fascinating and complex to me, and I agree that there are so many lyrics that could easily apply to Ray.

In my opinion, Ray is easily the most complicated character in this show. It's no wonder they chose Khaotung to play him because there are so many feelings he has to work through, especially in these emotionally-charged scenes. When the camera pans behind Ray's head and Sand appears, Ray slowly looks up at him with tears in his eyes. That first moment when he meets eyes with him and says his name just speaks to how agonizing this confrontation is for Ray, because he's confronting himself through the image of Sand. This entire scene is the acceptance of just how much Sand means to Ray, just how badly Ray has screwed up yet again, and just how much gratitude Ray has for Sand in his heart.

Your analysis of the religious aspects of the scene is so compelling. The golden coloring behind Sand echoes a lot of what @thewayuarent has analyzed about the contrast between cold blue lighting and warm gold lighting for both Sand and Ray. Also interesting your point about how the camera is slightly angled up at Sand rather than at eye-level. Originally I wouldn't think too much of this but contrasted with the shots of Ray at eye-level, it seems super intentional.

"Religious awakening" is a great way of describing it. There's been a lot of discussion about Ray putting Mew on a pedestal and idolizing him, but I think we see a similar kind of reverence being displayed here, but with some notable differences. With Mew, it felt like he was always something distant, something Ray wanted but could never quite touch. But in this scene, we have Ray facing Sand, on his knees for him, embracing him. Despite the whole thing being imaginary, it feels very real in a way I struggle to articulate. There's a worshipping aspect, I agree, but there's also a realism in the way Ray is very honestly considering his emotions. With Mew, I'd argue those feelings of idolization were allowed to grow out of Ray's fantasy, but with Sand, it isn't something Ray has blown up in his head. My main point being--I don't think it's necessarily suggesting an unhealthy power imbalance with Ray as the worshipper and Sand as the godly figure (in the way we saw with Ray and Mew), though I think this scene does an excellent job of emphasizing how Ray views Sand as someone honestly and purely good.

Another reason I think Khao delivers this so well is that he speaks through his eyes in every one of those scenes you mention. He sees all of Sand's goodness, but I don't think he's directly confronted his own behavior until this moment. Yes, he's apologized and yes he's realized that he was in the wrong. But here he is laying it all out on the table. Following the topic of religion, it almost feels like a confession. In Ray's imagination, this is a space where he can expel all of his feelings to the image of Sand. It's almost better that Sand can't react here (seeing as he's imaginary) because it brings the focus back to Ray. Even though Ray is crying to Sand and about Sand, it's all a reflection of his own flaws in their relationship and otherwise.

[animehouse-moe]

Jujutsu Kaisen Season 2 Episode 3: Hidden Inventory 3

I'll be the first to say it, this episode is markedly better than the prior two. It's better in quite a few different ways, though is still peppered with quite a few complaints. Would I say that things are looking up? Probably not, no. Would I say there's a chance at this adaptation getting better as we go on? Quite possibly, yes. It's a very weird spot, but this episode does well almost because it doesn't try to be Jujutsu Kaisen, rather it tries to move as far away from it as it can, and it's in the pieces that are central to JJK that you understand something is wrong. Confusing yes, but hopefully I can break down my thoughts into more detail with this post.

I like to call what I've just described the "Tanya The Evil Effect". It's an aspect where the depiction of a story and its events ends up so far deviated in tone and experience, that when under good direction and work you can still value and appreciate it as something disparate from the source material.

The episode director isn't in over their head this episode, Gosso isn't hamfisting excessive and incoherent direction into the content at large, there's just a lot of stuff that greatly divorces this episode from Gosso's vision at large, and is part of why it remains successful.

I still think there's things that are silly and pointless changes for the sake of cutting corners, like this sequence of Kuroi and Geto talking where they're static in the anime vs in motion in the manga. It's just one of those simple things that provides context and agency to the situation. Why would Geto and Kuroi be standing still if Amanai is in danger?

If you take a closer look at the episode, it's actually quite odd. There's a lot of direction that's bog standard, just characters in frame standing still. But then you get random bursts of direction that are surprisingly solid, like this piece of Amanai behind the fence/bars, symbolizing her isolation and feeling of being prisoner to her role as the Star Plasma Vessel. Arguably one of the only scenes that makes proper use of the change of scenery from the rooftop rendezvous of the manga.

Anyways, onto Okinawa. I'm disappointed, but also surprised. Incredibly sad to not see Gojo's summer hairstyle on display, but I also feel like with a lot of these scenes, this is the closest we'll manage to S1/manga humor parity.

Alright, back into disappointment mode. Very sad that they didn't include this pose/panel for Haibara and Nanami. Why don't we just continue to strip the characterization and style of this cast more, MAPPA? Also, poor Haibara man. Nanami's already a lost cause sadly, but I at least had a bit of hope for Haibara in spite of the early showings of their character design. Even worse than I was expecting to be honest. The energy and slightly goofy nature just does not exist within him in the anime.

Have to shout out my boy Asta/Tadano though. Love seeing Gakuto Kajiawara getting more and more VA roles.

Where was I? Oh yeah, Okinawa. This is now a drama anime, plain and simple. The framing/layouts/etc are all very much drama leaning, and it's well done. It's just that compared to what the manga offers.... it's, well, decidedly not it. Also, unsure why, but random scenes in the episode are very low-res? I know Tumblr compression does not help at all, but this scene in particular is incredibly grainy and odd. There's also something wrong here in how dull Gojo and Geto's colors are in the shade compared to how vibrant the scene is in the light. I wouldn't call it bad compositing, but the color design doesn't feel quite right. I mean, the second image is of them in the exact same spot under the shade, but it looks so much better? The environment art is sharper in their vicinity, the character designs are more detailed, there's proper shading, and the colors seem way more accurate/realistic.

Maybe I've just gotten used to the poor compositing/coloring of the series to be honest, because at first glance I didn't actually think it was as inconsistent as I'm finding it to be.

Also, shoutout MAPPA hating on Geto again man. This dude is just stepped all over through these episodes and it hurts me so much. His expressiveness is totally stripped away from him and replaced with some hollow smile that I'm sure anime onlies can even tell carries no weight. Like please tell me, who are these two people in the anime??? It just hurts, and it's the tip of the iceberg for the issues with faces and expressions.

Personally speaking, I think this one is the biggest failure from MAPPA. They literally did this exact defeated smile Geto loves to wear in JJK 0, and they can't repeat it for S2? It's just so painful to see them totally mismanage the characters despite having simpler designs so they can "be more expressive".

That's enough bemoaning what's happened to poor Geto, allow me to return to why this episode is actually better (though it only really borders on good) than the prior ones: that drama feel. They extend what's displayed in the manga of Amanai and co's Okinawa trip, and it's pretty well done. I'd say as a manga reader though? I don't really care, and I don't think it adds a great deal to the experience in the first place with how they chose to add things. The scenes are pretty and some of the best displayed in the episode though, of course. The good old MAPPA special of placing insane effort into original pieces while giving the source material the cold shoulder.

Okay, one little piece of criticism (though it's actually sorta big). MAPPA just can't keep their little paws off of messing up characters for some reason. It's a simple thing, I know, but it's also why I'm complaining about it. There was no need. No need to have Amanai place her hands behind her back, to do something that her character never did even once in the manga. But they do, and it changes the tone of Amanai simply walking through an aquarium, to Amanai placing more thought in the experience. A very frustrating and needless change that weighs down the actual potential displayed in the sequence at large.

Anyways, what makes this piece of the original adaptation good? Well, the use of the symbolism of fish was already strong in the manga thanks to Gege, as its used to further show Amanai's isolation and the lack of a group that she can exist alongside/be with. That part remains clear in the anime thankfully. The piece that adds to it though is the parallel between the aquarium and its customers. They place the idea of Amanai's isolation compared to the fish on top of the people visiting the aquarium. Sounds a little odd maybe but I'm bad at explaining, but the point is to show the isolation Amanai feels from seeing the fish (and whales) in the aquarium as a palpable and noticeable thing that she actively experiences.

Of course, I'm not without complaints, but I feel like it's easier to let it slide if you don't look deeply at this sequence. If you see it as something untethered to Amanai's character, the weird extra cuts of the fish swimming freely in the aquarium is fine, but putting it alongside the context of Amanai's character it's pretty confusing and excessive. Why spend all that time fixating on the movements of the fish trapped in an aquarium, relegated to their current fate? Feels like a tone deaf movement for some odd pursuit of artistry that neglects the function of the sequence.

Alright, on to the next butchered character/sequence! Toji and Gojo. Man, I knew what to expect considering they showed viewers as much of the "good" stuff as they could, but I didn't think it was going to get this weak.

I knew Toji was going to suffer, but I mean, how different can you really get and still call it the same character? What a weird shit-eating grin in the anime versus the far more creepy and naturally twisted smirk that rests on Toji's face. It's just incredibly bothersome to see them fail so miserably with reactions that are so important to characters.

And I mean, they do it again, and again, and again. The whole flashback sequence is meant to be played off like horror, and up until the reveal is well done. It's got tension, a cheesy horror soundtrack. It's got the potential to actually do something with the appeal it's aiming for, but it ultimately fails because what is Toji's reaction here? It's supposed to be the thing that he fears/despises/disgusts, but all that shows on his face is plain surprise? Compare that to the manga, and you see how flat and lifeless this reaction is.

Okay okay last one before I move on. What kind of pose is this? He's so relaxed and standing like he's already superior to Gojo, like he knows he could win effortlessly. It is absolutely not the pose and expression of a man set to go up against arguably the most feared sorcerer of his time.

Anyways, action and stuff. I don't think it's terrible. As I'd already established though it's not JJK action. It takes well done choreography and layouts, and reduces it to flashy cuts that viewers can barely piece together in time. What's more worth talking about is how dim and over processed the sequences are. They just end up looking so out of place no matter what MAPPA tries to do. Also man, the S2 OST really does stink. Even in a tense action sequence there's just zero heart in it. Such a massive flop compared to the electric work on S1 and 0.

Okay, yes, Keiichirou Watanabe's animation for Gojo's Blue is well done. But, if the camera wasn't having a seizure I'm sure it would be better received. Of course, same issues in regards to the prior statement about action with the dimming and over processing too. Wastes a lot of potential that the cut had to be a genuinely great piece of animation in the context of JJK. It still undeniably is, beneath all of the additional oddities that bury it, but it's pretty far removed from JJK.

If you want to understand what I'm saying, take a look at Hanami vs Yuji and Todo (Watanabe did the cut of Hanami's massive branch attack). Yes, the compositing is better for Gojo's blue, but take a look at the camera work. How much effort it places into keeping the duo in frame, how hard it tries to keep things cohesive and easy to follow. It's a night and day difference that shows the importance of a director in delivering the best version of someone's animation.

Anyways, here's Gojo's Blue sequence, as a video. Too long to make into a reasonable quality gif, and also insanely flashy and all over the place so nicer than having seizure material auto-play in two places at once.

Alright, so uh, Gojo dies, Toji pulls up with the gat and domes Amanai right in front of Geto, following it up by announcing that he killed Gojo. And then the episode ends. Honestly? I loved the ending just cause I know it'll cause so much chaos for viewers.

The episode overall though? It's weird that I think it noticeably better than the prior two when I've complained about so much, but maybe it's one of those things where the closer you get to being correct, the more faults you find in the thing being examined. Regardless, it feels like Toji's been incredibly nerfed from a viewer's perspective compared to the manga (alongside Geto and plenty of others), and honestly I had next to no hype for their actual sequence because it all felt so disjointed. The pacing of it felt off, and the action just didn't grab me with it's super flashy, highly processed, up close and personal so you can't quite tell what's going on combat. I'd say it's still a flop compared to what S1 would offer in comparison for big moments, but it's also done better on average when compared to the prior two episodes.

Pacing is of massive concern now though. We're three episodes in, with a total of five. It took us three episodes to make 8 chapters total, and we've got 6 though more likely 7 chapters of content left to cover for this arc, with only 2 episodes remaining. "Oh that's not too bad", except for the fact that there's the massive upcoming fight alongside us still having to get through Toji vs Geto. Even with the 6 instead of 7 chapters, even if they don't add any original content, they're speed-running at a minimum of 3 chapters for the last two episodes, which is pretty damn bold.

Is Hidden Inventory/Gojo's Past going to hold on and make it to the end in its current state, or will it rush itself to an early grave? Next episode will certainly be the deciding factor, but whatever it is, I'm not exactly hopeful of where we're going to be left.

[becauseimanicequeen]

RANDOM THOUGHTS: Two Worlds ep. 6

I’m hoping for more Khram and Thai moments in this episode, but I also want some more of Jao and Wayu. I want to see them bond… and fight… but mostly bond. And, let’s see how the whole Thai and the gang situation will play out. Or if they’re going to get closer to the truth about who’s after Phupha…

Thai and Khram are still starving. I don’t blame them.

Oh, it was a flashback. But, still…

Khram needs to up his lying game.

Khram: “We match.” Exactly what I thought when I saw them dressed up like that in those colors.

This venue looks popping in those contrasting colors (blue and orange).

Wayu is right. Jao just needs to find someone new. And the new guy is sitting right there! He’s literally staring you in the face! Come on, Jao, put down the alcohol and focus. (Or continue drinking and get into a drunken rendezvous, that’s cool too.)

Why do I get the feeling Wayu is already interested in Jao?

Every time someone says “It’s about my friend,” they’re talking about themselves.

Let’s see how long Thai is actually going to let Khram take care of himself. I mean, if this Khram is the one that gets caught in that cage/trap, the one in the preview for this episode, then it won’t be that long, I guess. But that scene might also be Thai’s backstory (meaning it’s his Khram). And if that’s so, it might take a bit longer before they get together again.

I’m pretty sure Khram will (or already did) refuse to go with Phupha. I honestly think their conversation at the party made Khram realize that pursuing Phupha wouldn’t be a good idea.

Damn, that painting is exactly the same as the one this Khram did in his own world.

So, it is backstory… Are we getting a condensed telling of their love story?

Damn, that tiger is beautiful.

Okay, so this is interesting. We’ve seen this Phupha have flashes of memories from the other Phupha’s life before. And now I think the same might happen to this Khram having flashes from Thai’s Khram’s life. However, I think they might be different since the Khram in the flashback from 3 years ago seemed to “link up” with the Khram from the present. So, what if (I’m just going to spin a delulu theory here)... What if this Khram somehow “links up” with the Khram from three years ago and this Khram turns out to be the reason Thai falls in love with him?

Yes, let’s find a dimly lit place to hide from the rain and thunder so we can get cozy.

Shirtless Thai!

Yes, Thai, give Khram some body heat.

Shitless Thai again!

OMG! He’s proposing!

Well, you can’t deny that these two are great kissers. No dead fish kisses in sight, and I’m so happy.

The fact that Max can kneel and still reach Nat’s chest with his lips made me cackle. Sorry, I had to mention that. Got to rewind now and focus on the actual scene…

Shirtless Thai again, again!

Thank you for the pan over Max’s exposed chest and pecks. I didn’t know I would be visiting heaven today. But, here I am…

I have to admit, I’m rather jealous of Nat for having the privilege of kissing Max’s bottom lip…

Well, that was… I’m not quite sure how I feel about this episode. I mean, it was good (I love Max and Nat’s chemistry). However, at the same time, it felt like a “filler” episode. Unless there actually is a link between both Khrams and that the link might turn out to be vital for the story. Maybe I went into this episode expecting too much…

Also, I’m still stuck on the whole Phupha storyline. When are we getting some progress in the mystery of who’s trying to kill him? Is Khram actually going to go with Phupha to Bangkok and figure out things from there? Did Khram look for Thai to ask him to also go to Bangkok? Questions, questions…