#seeking comfort in these bittersweet memories

[behindthecodes]

Concept art of The Forgotten Valley

[oofthwoods]

CHAPTER ONE! ── ˙ ̟ bring home the glory !!

𝐬𝐮𝐦𝐦𝐚𝐫𝐲 :: "what is a legacy? it's planting seeds in a garden you never get to see. i wrote some notes at the beginning of a song someone will sing for me". | a victorious journey always begins with a death and an offer.

𝐚𝐮𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐫'𝐬 𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐞 :: funerals, grief and death. if you don't feel comfortable with these themes, go straight to the part after 2023. you won't lose much, i promise! the second part is somehow based on right hand man from hamilton, don't ask about it. this is pretty much a prologue number two tbh, but i still hope you enjoy it.

𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐝 𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐭 :: 3.2k

⭠ previous masterlist next ‭→

2021

In the solemn setting of the cemetery, the sun hung in the sky, seemingly unaware of the grief below. Its golden rays contrasted sharply with the darkness consuming your soul, each beam of light piercing through the heavy clouds of sorrow. As tears streaked your face, the warmth of the sun felt out of place, a painful reminder of the world's indifference to your shattered heart.

Standing beside the graveside, you looked up to the sky, seeking solace in its vastness. But the heavens offered no comfort, no relief from the ache within. You wondered why the sky remained clear, why it didn't reflect the storm of emotions raging inside you. Its serene blue expanse seemed to mock your devastation, its unwavering indifference amplifying your pain.

Your mother and her siblings stood ahead, their shoulders bowed under the weight of grief, their sobs a haunting melody that echoed through the air. But you stood alone, isolated in your sorrow, drowning in memories that threatened to consume you whole.

Memories of your grandfather flooded your mind like a deluge, each one a bittersweet reminder of the love you had lost. His laughter, once a source of joy and comfort, now felt distant and painful, a cruel reminder of all that had been taken from you. His stories, his wisdom, his gentle touch — they all seemed like distant echoes of a life that was slipping further and further away with each passing moment.

You recalled his final moments, the frailty of his form, the sadness in his eyes as he whispered his last words to you. "Be proud of who you are," he had said, his voice barely a whisper, his breath brushing against your cheek. "And never forget where you come from. Your roots are your strength, my dear." His words had been a lifeline in the storm of your grief, a reminder of the legacy he had left behind, of the love that would endure long after he was gone.

As you stood beside his grave, the words offered little solace. They felt empty, a faint reminder of the warmth once found in his embrace. You longed to reach out to him, to feel the warmth of his touch one last time, to beg for just a moment more in his comforting presence. But he was gone, lost to you forever in a world that seemed infinitely colder and darker without him.

You closed your eyes, allowing the tears to fall freely as you whispered your silent goodbyes to him, each word a prayer for his eternal peace. But even as you spoke, you knew that no amount of tears could ever hope to fill the void he had left behind, that no words could ever hope to capture the depth of your loss.

As you stood there, lost in your grief, the soft sound of footsteps approached from behind. You turned to see your mother returning, her eyes red and swollen from tears, her expression etched with the same pain that weighed heavily on your own heart. For a moment, you simply stood there, sharing a silent understanding born from the depths of your shared sadness.

Without a word, she wrapped you in a gentle hug, her arms providing solace amidst the whirlwind of emotions swirling around you. "I'm not sure I can go on without him, Mom," you murmured, your voice barely audible as you buried your face against her shoulder.

Her embrace tightened, her fingers gently combing through your hair. "I feel the same way, sweetheart. But we have to find strength, for his sake," she whispered softly, her words tinged with a mixture of sadness and determination.

As you leaned into her embrace, the weight of your grief seemed to press down upon you, threatening to crush you beneath its relentless force. Your mother's presence briefly brought comfort, like a delicate lifeline amidst the stormy sea of emotions swirling inside you.

"I miss him so much already," you confessed with your voice trembling. "It feels like a part of me is missing, like I'll never be whole again."

Her arms tightened around you, a silent reassurance that you were not alone. "I know, my love. I do too," she whispered, her voice thick with unshed tears. "He was the heart of our family, the glue that held us together."

A bittersweet silence fell between you, punctuated only by the soft rustle of leaves in the gentle breeze. Memories of your grandfather danced through your mind like flickering candle flames, casting shadows of laughter and love against the walls of your grief-stricken heart.

"Do you think he's watching over us?" you asked quietly, your voice barely a whisper in the stillness of the evening.

Her hand stilled against your hair. "I'd like to think so," she replied, her voice wavering with uncertainty. "I'd like to believe that he's found peace, that he's somewhere out there, looking down on us with love in his heart."

Tears welled in your eyes as you imagined him, a silent guardian in the heavens above, watching over you with a warmth that transcended the boundaries of life and death. "I hope he knows how much we love him," you whispered, your words a fervent prayer whispered into the vast expanse of the sky.

"I'm sure he does, my dear," she murmured, her voice soft with tenderness. "And I know that wherever he is, he'll always be with us, guiding us through the darkness, lighting our way with the love that he left behind."

As your mother's words gently washed over you, a sudden movement caught your eye. In the corner of your vision, a flash of royal blue fluttered amidst the solemn surroundings. You blinked, momentarily startled, before fixing your gaze on the delicate creature that alighted on a nearby branch.

A small gasp escaped your lips as you beheld the bird, its feathers shimmering like fragments of the sky woven into living form. With a heart full of wonder, you watched as it stretched its wings, basking in the fading light of the evening sun.

"We can leave now, if you're ready, sweetheart." her mother murmured, delicately turning her daughter's face to meet her own. 

As your mother looked into your eyes, you could see the sadness reflecting in them, speaking volumes on its own. Although she softly hinted that you could go if you wished, it was evident that she longed for some respite from the weight of your mutual grief. Beneath her calm demeanor, you sensed her vulnerability, a silent plea to escape the overpowering sorrow surrounding you both. With a simple nod, you silently agreed.

With a mix of sadness and resolve, you followed your mother's lead, letting her guide you away from the graveside and back into the world. While you walked together, a quick look back caught your attention, drawing your eyes to the scene you were departing. And there, on top of the gravestone, sat the blue bird, its colorful feathers standing out against the solemn surroundings.

For a moment, time seemed to stand still as you watched the bird, a silent sentinel overlooking the final resting place of your beloved grandfather. He seemed to look at you, and, if birds could smile, you would swear he did.

2023

You find yourself standing outside a closed door, your hand hesitantly reaching out to lightly tap against the wood. The muffled voices from within only add to your uncertainty, but the urgency of speaking with the team principal before the Abu Dhabi sprint pushes you to take action. Whatever discussion awaits behind that door must be significant enough to pull you away from your pre-race meeting with the mechanics.

In the stillness of the hallway, time seems to stretch endlessly as you wait for a response that never comes. With a mixture of nerves and anticipation coursing through your veins, you finally muster the courage to grasp the doorknob. Its cool metal provides a fleeting sense of reassurance as you turn it slowly, the hinges creaking softly in protest as the door swings open to reveal the dimly lit room beyond.

Inside, seated at a table, is Mr. Vowles, engrossed in conversation. Your presence at the threshold goes unnoticed for a moment until you gather your resolve and speak up, your voice barely above a whisper as you address him.

"Mr. Vowles, did you need to see me?" you venture, your words hanging in the air with a hint of uncertainty.

At the sound of your voice, James looks up, his expression softening into a welcoming smile.

"Williams, come in," he says, his warm tone instantly easing your nerves as he gestures for you to enter. "Have you met Sargeant?" he continues, motioning towards a figure standing nearby, their presence previously hidden in the shadows of the room.

As James mentions Logan, it's like a floodgate of memories bursting open, whisking you back to the time when you and Logan shared an unbreakable bond. You were inseparable, navigating the twists and turns of life at the academy with laughter, support, and a shared vision of the future.

But as the competition for a spot in Formula One heated up, your friendship began to strain. What started as friendly competition slowly morphed into something more complicated. The pressure mounted, and with it came a subtle shift in your relationship. Each race seemed to drive a wedge between you, rather than bringing you closer.

It was at the peak of your rivalry that things started to unravel. Every little disagreement or perceived slight seemed to fester, poisoning the once vibrant atmosphere between you. Despite your efforts to keep up appearances, there was an underlying tension that threatened to fracture your bond.

When Logan secured a seat at Williams while you remained in F2, a whirlwind of emotions swept over you. Of course, you were genuinely happy for him, but there was also a pang of envy and disappointment gnawing at your heart. It felt like a piece of your own dream slipping away, leaving you grappling with a sense of loss you couldn't quite shake.

And then, just when you thought things couldn't get any more complicated, James hinted at the possibility of you stepping into Logan's shoes. The idea of replacing your friend-turned-competitor added another layer of complexity to an already tangled web of emotions. It was a constant battle between your ambition and the fear of losing the one person who had been by your side through it all.

"Yes, sir," you respond, choosing a simple response. Logan's gaze meets yours, seeming to ignite with intensity. "We keep on meeting"

In a deliberate choice of silence, Logan sidestepped any engagement with you, his eyes fixed on the team leader instead. "As I was just saying," he began, his voice brimming with confidence, "I truly believe that with these adjustments, I can improve my control over the car."

James reciprocated Logan's smile, though his gaze hinted at a wandering mind. "Sargeant?" he interrupted, signaling a shift in focus to another pressing matter.

"Yes, sir?" Sergeant replied promptly, ready for further instructions.

"We'll talk about this later. Close the door on your way out," James commanded, his tone decisive, drawing their exchange to a close.

As Logan's footsteps faltered on his way out, a pang of unease settled in your chest. You couldn't shake the guilt that crept in, knowing your success might come at the cost of his dreams.

In the relentless world of Formula One, sentimentality was a luxury few could afford. You grappled with the harsh reality that success often meant sacrificing the dreams of others. It was a something you had grappled with since the beginning of your journey, one that forced you to confront the truth that in this fiercely competitive arena, there would always be someone waiting in the wings to take your place if you faltered.

As you redirected your focus towards James, the man who now held the reins of your family's team, you couldn't help but reflect on the rarity of such a moment. Conversations with him had been few and far between, a testament to the typical hierarchy within Formula One teams where direct interaction between a team leader and a junior driver, especially mere hours before a pivotal race, was uncommon.

“Have I done something wrong, sir?” You ventured, a tinge of uncertainty coloring your tone.

"Not at all, quite the opposite actually," James responded, rising from his seat and leaning casually against the table, his arms folded. "Your stats this season are impressive—seven wins, numerous podium finishes. You've got a bright future ahead of you. But here's the thing, every day I see offers come across my desk to buy out your contract, and frankly, I find it amusing."

"Uh, sorry, I'm not following," you admitted, furrowing your brow in confusion.

"Williams, why is it that no team seems to be able to snag you?" James clarified, a hint of curiosity lacing his words. "You're undeniably talented, but turning down offers from big names like Alpine and Alpha Tauri might not be the smartest move."

"To drive their tractor, or worse, become a reserve driver? I don't think so." you remarked with a disbelieving smirk.

"Think about it, a spot at Alpha Tauri could open doors at Red Bull down the line," James suggested, attempting to sway your perspective.

"Everyone knows they have their sights set on Daniel Ricciardo, or Liam Lawson at best" you countered, a note of frustration creeping into your voice. "I'm a bit lost here. Why are you laying all this out for me?" you questioned, a perplexed furrow creasing your brow. You knew full well the offers on the table and why you were declining them. James likely wasn't in the dark about your reasons either.

"I'm just being honest with you," He replied, his tone carrying a hint of earnestness. His hand reached up to rub his forehead, fingers tracing over the lines etched there as if seeking solace in the familiar. "We're on a tight budget," he explained, a touch of resignation in his voice. "We're short on engineers and mechanics compared to almost everyone else, except maybe Haas and Sauber. While we've made progress since last year, I can't promise our car will match up to the competition next season."

James lifted his gaze, fixing it upon you with a mixture of earnestness and concern. "I'm not one to squander talent. I know you've got your reasons for sticking with us, and I'm grateful for the opportunity to have you on board. But I can't move forward without ensuring you understand exactly what you're signing up for."

"I'm just asking for a shot, James. Just one chance to prove that we've still got what it takes," you implored, your words tinged with determination. Images of past triumphs flickered through your mind, a reminder of the team's glory days.

With a weary smile, James let out a soft sigh. "Seems like sheer tenacity runs in the family, huh?"

"They used to say I took after my grandmother," you remarked casually, a wistful grin playing on your lips.

Turning to the desk, the man retrieved a piece of paper from a drawer, his movements deliberate and measured. "What are the odds?"

You knew precisely what he was referring to. "Iwasa's already out of the running. If I take the sprint, I'll have enough points to clinch the championship."

Extending the contract towards you, James presented it as if unveiling a glimpse of what lay ahead. "Win this championship, and the seat is yours."

The weight of his words hung heavy in the air, mingling with the anticipation that crackled between you. With the contract poised like a tantalizing promise, the room seemed to hold its breath.

You reached out tentatively, fingers hovering over the document that held the potential to shape your future. The paper felt crisp beneath your touch.

"I know it's a risk, trading one rookie for another" James conceded, his voice tinged with a hint of apprehension. "But I believe in you, and I need someone who believes in this team."

A surge of determination coursed through your veins, bolstered by James's unwavering faith. "I won't let you down," you vowed, your voice steady despite the flutter of nerves in her chest.

"TO TOP OFF AN INCREDIBLE SEASON, Y/N WILLIAMS WINS THE ABU DHABI SPRINT AND HAS ENOUGH POINTS TO CROWN HERSELF A CHAMPION." The narrator's voice reverberated through the sprawling circuit, amplifying the momentous declaration that crowned your achievement.

The roar of victory surged through the airwaves as your race engineer's voice erupted over the radio, a symphony of celebration. "You did it, Williams! Formula 2 champion, with one race to spare!"

Amidst the cacophony of cheers echoing from Rodin Carlin's garage, you felt a surge of adrenaline coursing through your veins, the weight of your accomplishment settling upon your shoulders like a mantle of triumph. Your mind raced with a whirlwind of emotions, a torrent of exclamations, gratitude, and tears that threatened to overwhelm your senses.

As you gradually eased the car to a decelerating pace, you couldn't help but feel the swell of pride and disbelief wash over you. With trembling hands, you lifted them skyward in a gesture of reverence, a silent tribute to the one who had inspired you journey.

"This one's for you, grandpa," you murmured, your voice a whisper against the backdrop of roaring engines and jubilant cheers. "I hope you're proud up there."

Amidst the jubilant chaos enveloping the pit lane, your thoughts swirled like a tempestuous storm, each emotion vying for dominance in the tumult of your mind. As you joined in the exultant cheers of your team, a sense of disbelief mingled with elation, the reality of your victory sinking in with each heartbeat.

In the midst of the celebration, you couldn't help but steal a moment to glance towards the podium, where your destiny awaited. The anticipation pulsed within you, a heady mixture of excitement and nervous energy propelling youforward.

As you ascended to the highest step, each stride felt like a triumph, a testament to the countless hours of dedication and sacrifice that have led you to this pinnacle moment. Your mind hummed with a whirlwind of thoughts and emotions, a kaleidoscope of memories and aspirations swirling in the depths of your consciousness.

The thunderous roar of the crowd enveloped you like a tidal wave, the sound of applause echoing in your ears as you stand upon the podium, bathed in the radiant glow of the spotlight. Your chest swells with pride, your heart beating in time with the pulsating energy of the spectators.

Locking eyes with James amidst the sea of faces, you feel a surge of excitement washing over you. There's a silent understanding that passes between you, a shared recognition of the journey you will embark upon together. In that fleeting moment, as your gazes meet, you know with a certainty that transcends words— you'll be signing that contract.

With a triumphant smile, you raise the championship trophy high above your head, the weight of your accomplishment buoyed by the unwavering support of your team and your unyielding belief in yourself.

And in the middle of the bustling paddock, a blue bird chirped happily, swooping towards the girl as she lifted the trophy high. It appeared as though he'd be sticking around a while longer.

taglist (tell me if you want to be added or removed <3 | italic means i couldn't tag you) :: @formulanni @clownrrari @leilanixx @notyouraveragemochii @alliwantisadonut @oooom4rie @watermelon-sugars-things @glitterquadricorn @minkyungseokie @formulaal @itsjustkhaos @thebearchives @hiireadstuff @laura-naruto-fan1998 @cptg00s3 @welovediaaxx @eugene-emt-roe @cha-hot

[jaquemuses]

i’m an angst comfort GIRL so if you would be interested in writing anything maybe about childhood friends enzo and reader where it’s right people wrong time for years ( definitely mutual feelings, maybe reader always thought enzo was too good for them so they never really thought they had a chance but is oblivious to the fact that enzo was head over HEELS for them but was worried about dragging them into the spotlight as he grew more famous) until they finally end up together i’d be thrilled!! ofc no matter what thank you so much!! have a great day/night!!❤️❤️

GIRL ME TOO !!! so glad you requested it, i wrote this, hope u enjoy it ♡♡

Starry night | Enzo Vogrincic

Synopsis: Sharing feelings has always been challenging, but under the starry sky, sitting right beside his childhood friend on the eve of his movie premiere party, Enzo confesses a love that has lingered his heart since he was seven.

Word count: 1.5k

Content: Enzo Vogrincic/Reader, mutual pining, childhood friends to lovers, hurt/comfort, fluffy overall, no explicit content, focus on emotions, and strong affection for Enzo, references to ghibli's movies.

a/n: hi there !! i hope you guy enjoy this i pulled an all nighter just to write it lmaooo so bear with me if there's any typos or such; english isn't my first language, but I hope it's a good read!

- xoxo Kara ♡

Time slips away so quickly.

Beneath the starry sky, the weight of its passing moments engulfs you like a fuzzy tidal wave, heavy and suffocating. Sinking beneath its weight has become your routine.

A soft, resigned sigh escapes your lips, the midnight air crisp on your tongue, turning into vapor in the summer night. Beyond your sight, stars burn in tandem, the cosmos vast and immersive. The moon, tonight, is a big blob of reflected sunlight, smiling tenderly, casting a soothing glow like a mother's voice.

In the familiarity of the sight, there's comfort. The moon, always there, in crescents or hidden by clouds, a constant in a changing world. What a peculiar and lovely thing it is to be under the celestial dance, where even the moon, with its timeless presence, seems to join the ever-moving cosmic ballet.

As you lay on the rooftop, the distant melody of music from the house below reaches your ears. It's a reminder of shared laughter, playful banter, and the bond you once had with Enzo. The thought of losing him, not just as a childhood friend but as this life partner makes you wanna cry right there.

Another second lost, as you gaze into the nothingness of space. Time keeps passing you by, never stopping —seconds turning into minutes, minutes turning into months. that incessant moving of the hands of the clock; tick, tock, tick, tock. over and over again.

and, really, it's a little bit scary. you think you might be terrified of time. you're so afraid, afraid of being left behind, afraid that the world will turn its back on you and then walk away. afraid that everyone and everything will change shape before you know it

The music serves as a soundtrack to your memories, a bittersweet symphony echoing through the night. Enzo, your companion through the years, feels like he's slipping away, and the weight of that potential loss is heavy against the backdrop of the starlit sky.

But even in this always-changing, turbulent mess of a life

one thing remains the same;

"Ah, there you are," Enzo's voice, honeyed and familiar, breaks the silence. A small smile graces your lips at the sight of him.

That voice...

honeyed and smooth, but still rough around the edges, just a little husky. Deep and familiar, etched into your brain; even if you were to forget everything else, you're sure you'd still remember it. That familiar voice. It sounds like moonlit nights, and sunkissed kitchens.

it sounds like coming home.

A turn of your head. it's a subconscious reaction, as natural as the beating of your own heart, memorized down to the very marrow of your bones — muscle memory, to seek him out after hearing the low timbre of his voice. You do it as if it's the only thing worth hearing.

And Enzo is smiling, when your eyes meet his. That gentle upward tug of his lips, small yet sincere. The one that always puts your mind at ease.

"How'd you know I'd be up here?" you tease, a playful glint in your eyes.

"Lucky guess," Enzo replies, his grin revealing the comfort of shared moments.

Of course, he knew. Tracking you down was his thing, always has been. Like that time when he found you concealed under a table at your twelfth birthday party or the time he discovered you teary-eyed in the woods during your school field trip.

Finding you always comes easy to Enzo. Almost like he's always seeking you out, subconsciously or otherwise, always paying attention to your movements. You go south, and he follows, you go north, and he's already waiting up ahead.

"Damn, how'd you know?" you playfully pout, looking into him.

"I always know, silly" Enzo confesses softly, his eyes holding a warmth that speaks volumes. "I've known you since we were seven"

A gentle inhale passes between you as the silence settles, the moon casting its glow on your shared history.

"I thought you might be too busy with, you know, the whole famous actor thing," you admit trying to make it a joke but insecurity creeps into your words. "Congratulations on that, i always knew you'd make it"

The whole party underneath you both was for Enzo, you felt kind of stupid for leaving so suddenly, after all tonight's was Enzo's night. But before he realized it, you had slipped away, seizing the chance as soon as others grew too drowsy to take notice.

But he always notices you.

And he's worried. just a bit, is what he tells himself but truthfully it's more than that.

You look small, enzo thinks, curled up with your knees to your chest. Sitting all alone up on the roof of his home, a place you'd always go to on nights when you couldn't sleep. Together, sharing whispered secrets and hushed laughter until the sun began to rise again. Back then, it felt like the two of you were the only ones awake in the whole world.

(the safest world he's ever known.)

The distance between you grows narrower, as enzo makes his way over to you - and it always does, at the end of the day. No matter how much time you spend apart, that uncomfortable distance always, always ends up broached. One of you always moves closer. As if it's unavoidable, two planets spinning around each other's orbit.

Enzo sits down right next to you, crossing his legs and leaning back. his knee bumps against the side of your shoe, and his shoulder grazes yours. It's natural, as natural as the glow of the moon, this closeness between you. It reminds you of the gentle lapping of the ocean waves of Punta del este at your bare ankles; on mellow summer days when you were 10 and went to a trip with your parents and Enzo's, comforting and familiar. A warmth that never goes away.

The moon bathes the rooftop in a gentle glow as Enzo chuckles in response to your teasing remark. "Busy? Yeah, it gets a bit crazy, but it's moments like these that remind me of what truly matters. And you know im never too busy for you." He shifts, a thoughtful expression on his face, as he gazes at the city below.

A brief inhale, and your heartbeat settles into a tender rhythm again. The scent that always lingers on Enzo's skin drifts throughout the air, mingling with your own — it can be hard to distinguish between the two, with how often you end up wearing each other's clothes, but you could never mistake it for anything else. Cedarwood and earl gray, with a hint of coconut-scented shampoo enveloping every single one of your senses, grounding you in a way nothing else can.

Leaning just a little closer to him, subconsciously, youet a fond exhale slip from your lips. Barely audible. And Enzo mimics it.

The silence between you is a comfortable one. Always has been. A little fickle, always shattered by one of you before long —usually you, though enzo isn't much better. But this time, he stays silent.

He's waiting. You know he is, because he always does.

He's waiting, waiting for you to break the silence first. Waiting for you to say something, tell him what's wrong, explain why you're up here instead of celebrating with the others. Waiting for you to explain why your eyes have looked so tired, this past week.

Enzo is nothing if not patient. So he waits, unbothered by the silence. Admiring the stars, and the flicker of their light. A vague worry simmers in his chest, however, and he can't stop himself from glancing down at you every now and then.

An insatiable yearning to soothe you gnaws at his heart

—but he can't, not unless you let him.

A sigh drops from your lips, suddenly. Deep and heavy, ike a rock thrown into the depths of a lake. The silence breaks.

"En...?"

The guy stays quiet, just humming inquisitively. He avoids eye contact, showing respect. He figures you'll spill what's on your mind more comfortably without him staring.

Your fingers lightly tap the rooftop tiles out of habit. You take in a bit of the midnight air—it's got that summer taste. "Remember how we first met?"

Enzo glances at you, surprise flickering in his eyes. He can't resist the urge to peek at your face, savoring your expression. Then, a chuckle escapes him. "Are you feeling sentimental?" he teases, a playful note in his voice, light and airy like seafoam. "Did you come out here just to reflect?"

The corners of his lips lift when he hears you huff, pulling your legs closer with a furrowed brow. Cheek pressed against your kneecap, you meet his gaze.

"Come on," you whine, pouting childishly, a trick you know will make him give in. "Just indulge me a little."

Enzo smiles, soft around the edges, radiating unmistakable fondness. He always indulges you. "Of course I do," he assures you.

The quiet settling between your words holds a tender understanding, a silent agreement.

"Of course, I remember. How could I forget? You broke into my backyard."

A sigh, weighty and pointed, escapes your lips. Enzo fights back a grin; his eyes dance with teasing mischief in the darkness as you shoot a glare his way.

"Okay, first of all," you begin, "I didn't break into anything. I climbed over the fence. Peacefully."

Enzo raises a brow. "That literally doesn't matter; it's still trespassing."

"I was seven years old!"

"Damn! Some of you criminals start young."

Another playful huff escapes you as you halfheartedly attempt to sound annoyed. Unsuccessful, you hide your growing smile by tucking your face into your knees. "Whatever."

Then your gaze shifts, drawn to the expanding starry sky, the vibrant flicker of the moon like a moth to a flame, helpless to its charms. It resembles a giant sponge cake, reminiscent of the ones you and Enzo used to make when that was the only recipe you knew – you'd eat from the batter, and he'd scold you. Then he'd do the same when your back was turned.

A smile graces your lips. In each star, a new memory unfolds, and the warm nostalgia surrounding you makes your heart feel exposed. "I just wanted to pet Ada" you reminisce, softly rememberig how little the cat was back then.

Enzo nods, his gaze directed at you, reveling in the expression on your face – tranquil and at ease, a bit more of yourself. Effortlessly lovely, bathed in moonlight. "Yeah, I remember."

He lets the memory carry him away for a moment or two, recalling the sight of you all those years ago, an unfamiliar child in his backyard. It was as if you had fallen from the sky – quiet and shy, yet with an excited glimmer in your eyes as you looked at his cat.

"You just pointed to her and expected me to understand," he continues, a grin blooming on his face, hopelessly endeared. "You were so shy back then."

A raise of your eyebrow. "Um? I'm still shy?"

Enzo gives you a look. He doesn't have to say anything – it's written all over his face. The classic Vogrincic look, the kind where you can tell he's itching to say, "Oh, really now?" The kind where he tries to appear judgmental but never quite manages to hide the amusement in his eyes.

A soft chuckle escapes your lips, and Enzo smiles once more, utterly captivated by your joy.

"Then we watched movies at my place,"

You hum. "It was fun."

"Yeah," he agrees.

Another spell of silence descends, tender and incredibly precious. The air is cool but not enough to make you shiver – a mild summer night, gentle on your skin and light on your heart. A soft breeze tousles your hair, and in the distance, cicadas buzz – a familiar, unchanging sound.

(If only everything else could remain the same, too.)

"Do you remember what movie it was?"

A lazy smile graces Enzo's lips as he turns to look at you, one eyebrow raised.

"Is there a point to this, or are you just trying to make m–"

"I just wanna reminisce."

Enzo pauses, observing your gaze as it wanders across the landscape, from the moon to the distant city lights. Absentmindedly fidgeting with the strings of your hoodie, you seem a bit lost, your eyes forgotten within the depths of the endless night sky.

No more teasing, he decides, choosing a more delicate approach. He answers your question softly, as if each octave of his voice could potentially cause you harm. "Whisper of the Heart," he reveals.

A little nod follows your hum of agreement. "Thats a top-tier one."

Enzo shifts his gaze away, muttering something under his breath. Still audible, though. "Spirited Away takes the cake..."

Catching a glimpse of your unimpressed look, he suppresses a soft laugh. His teeth graze his lip gently, just enough to avoid any sting.

"You're so basic," you playfully grin.

"You just want to feel special," Enzo retorts, quick on the uptake. "And you only like it because of Seji."

"You're only a Spirited Away fan because of Haku!"

Enzo closes his eyes, leans back a bit, crossing his arms in a somewhat childlike manner – a move aimed at drawing out laughter. "I don't know what you're talking about," he pretends.

"Oh, come on," you scoff. "Do you really think I've forgotten your sudden "enlightenment"?"

"Hm? What's that?" Feigning confusion, Enzo puts a hand to his ear, amusement twinkling in his eyes. "You'll have to come closer; I can't hear you from here."

Another unimpressed look accompanies your exhale, a mix of a scoff and a chuckle. "If I get any closer, I'll be in your lap, goofball."

Enzo bites his cheek gently, holding back the words that almost slip off his tongue.

(He wouldn't mind)

"Sorry, can you repeat that?" A playful nudge meets his shoulder as you roll your eyes.

"Yeah, yeah. Whatever."

The banter fades away as quickly as it came. Then, smiles break out across both your faces simultaneously, the atmosphere shifting into something more sincere. Doesn't it always when you're gazing at the starry sky with the one you love most?

As Enzo continues, his voice takes on that softer tone once again—the one thats only reserved for you. "I always liked imagining us as them," he confesses. "Me as Haku, and you as Chihiro."

A soft blink, and your smile sweetens like syrup. "...That's amusing," you cross your legs, palms flat against the roof, knee comfortably leaning against Enzo's. "I always thought of us as Seiji and Shizuku."

There's a distant look in your eyes, something Enzo can't look away from. Tentatively, his fingers press into the skin of his palms, and he speaks, absentminded and a bit uncertain. ".. they get married at the end, don't they?"

A pause, then your gaze locks onto Enzo's, suddenly mischievous – and he regrets opening his mouth.

"Oh?" you purr, almost beaming, closing the distance like a

predator sizing up its prey. "Oh, really? Is this a proposal, Mr. Vogrincic?"

"I'm just stating facts" he quips, hands raised in defense, hoping you won't notice the red tint creeping up his neck, hidden by the night.

"Incorrect facts," you grin. Whether you catch the blush or not, you don't mention it. "They get engaged, not married. Big difference."

Enzo huffs, small, trying to suppress a smile. The beat of his heart is faint, a gentle rhythm stirred by every move you make. He pushes back the words he longs to say. "I wouldn't mind that, either."

Once again, silence envelops you, weaving around the space between you. It's comforting, just being like this; you and your best friend under the moon's soft glow. As if you're the sole inhabitants of an otherwise vacant universe, free from space and time.

Like the night could pause and stretch on forever.

Yet, there's an unspoken question lingering. One Enzo is still waiting for you to answer. One you won't address until he does the same.

Both of you have noticed, even if no one else has – the turmoil in your eyes, the fatigue under his. Those subtle signs of stress as everything around you keeps twirling on, as the future approaches with every passing day.

"Remember how school felt like it would last forever, and now... it's all just a blur."

Enzo's eyes light up with nostalgia. "Yeah, the days when we believed we could conquer the world. Time goes by so quickly." He pauses, a wistful smile playing on his lips. "But hey, we had some pretty great adventures."

A soft laugh escapes you. "Adventures, mischief, and a fair share of detentions. I miss those days."

Enzo grins, "Our secret base, the pranks we pulled, and the dreams we shared. Life was simpler back then."

You sigh, "Simpler, but full of possibilities. Now everything feels like it's rushing by, and I can't keep up."

Enzo reaches for your hand, offering a comforting squeeze. "You're not alone in feeling that way. I miss the simplicity too, but some things haven't changed." He looks into your eyes, his gaze holding a depth of emotions.

"Yeah, your talent and that dream that's not a dream anymore En. Its now your reality, and I'm so proud of you, I'd always knew you'd make it" You said with a nostalgic smile on your face.

Deep down, you knew you'd end up losing him; he had everything to succeed in the industry.

Enzo meets your gaze, a hint of gratitude in his eyes. "Thank you, sweetheart... It means a lot to hear that from you."

As Enzo utters the endearment "sweetheart," a fluttering sensation courses through your stomach, a delicate dance of butterflies that seems to synchronize with the newfound warmth in your chest. With a surge of emotions enveloping you, you can't help but wrap your arms around Enzo's body, hugging him tightly and feeling the size difference between the both of you. A murmured "of course" escapes your lips.

The moonlight paints a soft glow around you both, and the distant sounds of the party create a gentle background melody. Enzo takes a moment after the hug, collecting his thoughts, his thumb gently caressing the back of your hand.

"There's something I've been wanting to tell you for a long time, You know?" He starts, catching your eye. "Oh look who's reflecting now" You say as you laugh softly. "What is it?"

"These moments, right here, remind me of the times when life was simpler, and we were just two kids dreaming under the same sky." He pauses, searching for the right words.

"You know, when we were younger, I used to take you to the cinema, to the lake, even on your 15th birthday... Each time, I wanted to tell you something important, but I never found the right moment. It's been on my mind, and I'm tired of postponing it."

Your heart quickens at his words, confusion mingling with anticipation. Enzo's expression shifts, becoming more serious yet tender.

"Do you remember those times? I was trying to say that..." He hesitates a little, his eyes looking straight into yours, noticing how every single star can fit on your gaze "I'm in love with you. From the days of our childhood adventures to now, you've always been the girl of my dreams. I wanted to share my success with you because you've been my constant, my anchor."

The weight of his confession hangs in the air, and your mind races to process the revelation. Enzo continues, "I know that recently the world sees me as this actor, but to you, I just want to be Enzo. The boy you've known since we were seven. I'm tired of hiding my feelings, and I didn't want to lose another moment without letting you know."

Silence stretches between you, the memories of your shared past intertwining with the present. You're caught between the familiarity of nostalgia and the unexpected confession, yet, suddenly, some things start to make sense.

Enzo's eyes search yours, vulnerable and earnest.

"En, wait... what do you mean? In love with me? Like, as a friend or...?" Your words trail off, searching for clarity.

Enzo takes a deep breath, his thumb caressing the back of your hand. You can feel him shaking. "No I mean, romantically in love with you. Since we were kids, I've tried to tell you, but I never found the right moment."

Your eyes widen, replaying moments in your mind. "Wait, are you saying all those times – the cinema, the lake, my 15th birthday – you wanted to confess your feelings?"

Enzo nods, a mix of vulnerability and sincerity in his eyes. "Exactly. I kept hoping for the perfect moment, but life just kept moving too fast"

Your mind races, grappling with the revelation. Enzo continues, "What im trying to say is you've been the girl of my dreams since i can remember. I wanted to share my success with you, not just as an actor but as the person who's been my constant through it all."

Silence envelops the rooftop, the city of Montevideo below seemingly hushed in anticipation. Enzo looks at you, his expression a mosaic of hope and uncertainty.

After a moment of processing, you break into a soft laugh. "Enzo, this is... I... i just never saw this coming... oh my god"

With a warm smile, Enzo pulls you into a hug, and you reciprocate, embracing the familiarity of his presence. "Its okay if you dont feel the same... but I... I've just been carrying this for so long; it feels good to finally share it with you." He says with a sad tone.

As you're held in Enzo's embrace, the vulnerability of the moment encourages you to share your own feelings. "Enzo, no... Its not that, its just that I... I never thought you'd see me that way. I always felt like you were way too good for me, like I'd never be enough, so i always thought it'll be pointless to confess because you'll end up leaving me... And its just the thought of losing you as a friend and now knowing you've felt this way for so long, it's just overwhelming."

Enzo loosens the hug, gently holding your shoulders as he looks into your eyes. "You were always more than enough. I never wanted to risk our friendship, but holding back these feelings became harder as time went on. Our friendship means the world to me, and the fear of losing you kept me silent."

Tears glisten in your eyes as you continue, "I spent so many nights up here on this rooftop, wondering if I was just another friend among many for you. I never thought I could be the one you'd be in love with."

Enzo wipes away a tear with his thumb, a tender smile on his face. "You were never just another friend. You were the one who understood me, laughed with me, and stood by me through it all. And I've been in love with you since we were kids."

The weight of unspoken emotions finally laid bare, you share a bittersweet laugh. "Guess we were both too scared to ruin what we had."

Enzo nods, his hand now resting on your cheek. "Maybe, but holding back feels like a bigger risk now. I don't want to waste any more time, not when i don't know how much of it we have left"

As the moonlight bathes both of you, you take a deep breath and finally say, "Enzo, I've always been in love with you too."

A shared understanding and a newfound honesty linger in the air as Enzo leans in and his lips meets yours in a tender kiss, a culmination of years of unspoken emotions and shared moments. In that intimate exchange, the rooftop becomes a sanctuary for a new beginning, and just for that moment: time seems to stand still.

[theemporium]

blue-"I'm sorry, I'm so sorry." nico being devastated he’s hurt and just needs to be held by his girlfriend

i made it a bit more emotional hurt than physical! thank you for requesting!🫶🏽

29. "I'm sorry, I'm so sorry."

.

It was bittersweet. 

He knew it was coming. The team knew it was coming. The fans knew it was coming. It had been a rough year with messy strategies, tough injuries and bad luck slapping them in the face after the season they had the previous year. It was rough and it weighed down on everyone and it was shattering. 

But, deep down, there was this little spark of hope in his chest. 

Hope that they could pull through and do the impossible. Hope that they could defy the odds and make it through to the playoffs. Hope that they would click and be the amazing team he knew they could be. 

He had so much fucking hope and it was completely washed away the second that final buzzer went, the reality that they had been eliminated finally settling amongst them as they looked at each other on the ice.

But Nico stepped up. He was the captain. He had these boys looking up to him and seeking him out as a pillar of comfort and reassurance. He couldn’t be moping around the locker room, not when he had to take care of his boys first. Not when he had to face the media and drag the interview out as long as he could so the other boys didn’t have to spend too long with them. Not when he had to deal with whatever debrief meetings and logistics the coaches and team wanted to have.

They may have been eliminated but he still had his duties to perform. 

He felt like he was running on pure muscle memory by the time he left the Rock, settling behind the wheel of his car with a heavy sigh. His brain was racing with a million different thoughts as he drove home, plaguing him with what if’s and could have been’s. Despite the exhaustion settling in his body, his mind felt far too wired and overwhelming and, fuck, he just wanted it to stop. 

And then he walked through the door and saw you cuddled up on the couch, drowning in one of his hoodies and a blanket his mother had gifted you both when you moved in, and the last of his resolve crumbled.

“Hey, baby,” you murmured, your voice soft and sweet and soothing as he dropped his bags at the door and quickly made his way towards you. He didn’t even hesitate as he practically draped himself on top of you, burying his face into the fabric of your—his—hoodie.

“I’m sorry, I’m so sorry,” he blurted out because the words had been on the tip of his tongue. They had been lingering in the back of his head since the season had started, had been lingering after every loss and hardship the team and fans had to face. 

“Shhh, it’s not your fault, Nico,” you cooed, your arms winding around his body to hold him tight. Because somehow you knew what was going through his head, you knew the way he was spiralling, you just knew him. “None of this is your fault.”

“Just their faces—” he cut himself off with an unpleasant sound, something stuck between a sob and a scoff. Instead, he nuzzled himself closer like he could bury himself between your ribs and stay there forever. 

“I know, baby, I know.” Your fingers ran through his hair, your nails lightly scraping along his scalp in an attempt to soothe him. “Last year wasn’t a fluke, okay? This year was the fluke. Next season will be your season, I just know it.”

“You don’t know that,” he murmured, his words twisting the self-deprecating knife lodged in his heart since the season had started going downhill. 

“I know everything,” you corrected before lightly tugging on his hair until he lifted his head. You flashed him a soft smile, your hands gently holding his face as your thumb smoothed over the small scar on his cheek. “You’re gonna lead that team to the win you all deserve, Nico. I know that. The boys know that. The fans know that.”

He could only muster a small smile.

“And I will happily remind you until you believe in yourself again,” you added before leaning over to peck his lips, feeling the tension in his body finally start to leave for the first time since he entered the apartment.

“I love you,” he murmured when he couldn’t find any other words to capture how he was feeling.

“I love you too, baby.”

.

[shebunie]

Can you do Mizu x British fem reader? So what happens is that mizu and reader got together (romantically) when they were back at London but whens mizu done with her quest she's goes back to Japan but with the reader. Reader and mizu goes to see everyone/friends that they know and their shocked (or you can choose depending on the person/character) that Mizu brought the reader also Mizu is very protective of reader and you continue off that if you want! Also can you do some lime to? 🤭

𝐒𝐜𝐞𝐧𝐭 𝐨𝐟 𝐒𝐩𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠

��𝗶𝘇𝘂 𝘅 𝗕𝗿𝗶𝘁𝗶𝘀𝗵!𝗿𝗲𝗮𝗱𝗲𝗿

𝐖𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠: 𝗧𝗮𝗶𝗴𝗲𝗻. 𝘁𝗵𝗮𝘁'𝘀 𝗶𝘁, 𝗮𝗻𝗱 𝘀𝗼𝗺𝗲 𝘀𝘂𝗴𝗴𝗲𝘀𝘁𝗶𝘃𝗲 𝘁𝗵𝗲𝗺𝗲𝘀 𝐖𝐨𝐫𝐝 𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐭: 𝟮.𝟳𝗸 𝐀/𝐍: 𝗧𝗵𝗶𝘀 𝗶𝘀 𝗾𝘂𝗶𝘁𝗲 𝗹𝗲𝗻𝗴𝘁𝗵𝘆, 𝗜 𝗵𝗼𝗽𝗲 𝗜 𝘄𝗮𝘀 𝗮𝗯𝗹𝗲 𝘁𝗼 𝗲𝗻𝘃𝗶𝘀𝗶𝗼𝗻 𝗶𝘁. 𝗥𝗶𝗻𝗴𝗼 𝗺𝘆 𝗯𝗼𝘆 𝘀𝗼 𝗰𝘂𝘁𝗲

"Spring is nearly at its bloom," Mizu remarked, her voice carrying a hint of nostalgia as both of you strolled through the bustling streets of Kyoto. The cherry blossoms were in full bloom, casting a delicate pink hue over the city. 

"The beauty of Kyoto in spring is truly something special," The sword wielder continued, her fingers lightly tracing the petals of cherry blossom as you passed by. "Each year, it feels like a renewal, a fresh start."

“You’ve always told me stories about its beauty but witnessing it in person, truly you did not give this sight justice with your words.” you teased the swordswoman, The air was filled with the sweet fragrance of the blossoms, and the distant sound of a shakuhachi flute added a melodic touch to the atmosphere.

Mizu giggled, her eyes sparkling with a mix of amusement and affection. "Perhaps, some things are better experienced than described." She glanced at you, her hand finding yours as she led you through the vibrant streets.

As you continued your leisurely walk through the streets, the blue-eyed warrior’s thoughts seemed to drift momentarily, a subtle melancholy shadow passing across her face. The journey she had embarked on, seeking vengeance for the discrimination she had to endure, had been long and arduous. But now, with the vendetta behind her, a new chapter awaited.

"There's a place I want to take you," she said mysteriously, her eyes regaining their usual determination. As you continued your stroll, the two of you reached the outskirts of Kyoto, heading towards Kohama. Mizu's steps became more deliberate, a mixture of anticipation and a tinge of hesitation in her demeanour. 

Sandals shifted on the dirt path, eyes as vibrant as the morning sky after early morning passed and looked down to that small little house. A sense of warmth, comfort, and familiarity washed through her as both of you slowly walked down the steep hill, Mizu gently lending a hand for your safety. Eventually, you arrived at the cabin, Mizu exhaled deeply as she approached the home with her hand tightly wrapped around the strings of her hat.

“I’m sure they’d be delighted to see you back alive, Mizu” you assured her, fingers tracing along the lines of her calloused hand. She nodded, a mixture of gratitude and apprehension in her gaze. The memories of this place were both tender and bittersweet.

She need not have to practice her words. Swordfather consistently extended a warm welcome, contrary to the doubts that lingered in the recesses of her mind. Nevertheless, she couldn't shake off a peculiar sense of obligation to Ringo. 

The door to the cabin opened hastily, revealing a tall yet chubby man, head wrapped with white fabric their eyes widened in surprise and then quickly filled with joy as they saw Mizu standing there. 

“Mizu!” The large man, who unexpectedly embraced her and hoisted her off the ground, exclaimed with joy, "You're back! A-And alive!" Ringo squeezed Mizu so tightly that the pain from her healing bones and wounds shot through her, though she was relieved not to feel indebted to him anymore. She grunted in response. 

“If… you don't put me down, n- neither of us will be," she warned, gritting her teeth. Ringo chuckled heartily, finally setting Mizu down but kept his stubs on her shoulders, as if making sure she was real and not just a figment of his imagination. Mizu couldn't help but grin at his exuberance, appreciating the genuine warmth that emanated from him.

Ringo’s eyes wandered to the figure beside his master, there you stood, with a soft smile on your painted lips, eyes emitting a gentle glimmer. “You brought a girl! - A pretty girl.”

You chuckled at Ringo's enthusiastic remark, recognizing the jovial tone in his voice. Mizu shot him a playful glare, but he seemed oblivious, still beaming with joy at Mizu's return, as her hand found its way to the side of your hip, giving it a gentle squeeze.

“It seems Mizu didn’t lie about your cheerful attitude, you’re too harsh for calling him annoying.” you voiced.

Ringo's expression shifted from joy to curiosity as he shook your hand vigorously. "Well, Mizu has never been one to bring just anyone around. You must be special," he declared, his eyes gleaming with mischief. Mizu rolled her eyes, used to Ringo's playful banter.

"Special or not, just don't let him talk your ear off with his stories. You'll be begging for silence within minutes," Mizu teased, earning a mock offended gasp from Ringo.

"Hey now, my stories are legendary! People travel far and wide just to hear them," Ringo defended himself, placing a hand dramatically over his heart. Mizu and you exchanged amused glances.

"Legendary for their length, maybe," Mizu retorted, earning a laugh from Ringo. As the three of you walked together, Ringo couldn't help but throw in another comment. "So, Mizu, spill the details! Where have you two been? Any epic battles? Dramatic rescues?" he asked with a mischievous twinkle in his eye.

Mizu sighed, but there was a fondness in her eyes. "We've had our fair share of adventures, but not every tale is meant to be shared, Ringo. Some things are better left unsaid."

Ringo nodded solemnly, then grinned. "Of course, a samurai never reveals its secrets.” You chuckled, realizing that Ringo's friendly personality added a lively touch to the atmosphere. Sounds of something thudding against the ground interrupted the reunion, as your gaze settled on an old man.

“Swordfather.” Mizu greeted with a sudden stiffness. 

Swordfather looked at her his brows furrowed and his lips thinned. He hummed as he simply stared for a few tense moments. Mizu blinked softly, she nodded and he exhaled deeply. “This house is getting too crowded…” He muttered in slight annoyance and Mizu couldn’t help the relief she felt as she smiled at him.

You observed the interaction, noting the subtle dynamics between Mizu and Swordfather. Despite his initial gruff demeanour, there was an undeniable connection between them, an unspoken understanding. 

Bowing respectfully, acknowledging Swordfather's presence despite his blindness. His acute hearing allowed him to perceive your gesture, and he responded with a nod in your direction. "A new face, what brings you here?" he inquired, his voice calm but carrying a certain weight that hinted at his years of experience.

Despite being blind, his movements were sure and deliberate. He relied on the sounds around him, the rustling of leaves, the distant hum of the village, and the footsteps of those around him.

You introduced yourself, explaining the circumstances that led you to Mizu during her travels in London. Swordfather listened intently, his head tilting slightly as if to better focus on the sound of your voice. "Hmmm," he mused, a thoughtful expression crossing his face. "In these troubled times, it is not uncommon for destinies to intertwine. Mizu has a habit of attracting interesting companions."

Ringo laughed, "You have no idea, Swordfather. Our friend here is not only interesting but quite skilled, too."

Swordfather's blind eyes seemed to fixate on you, or perhaps it was a mere coincidence. "Skills are valuable, but character is what truly matters. Mizu has a keen sense for both." His words carried a weight that hinted at years of wisdom and experience.

As you approached the entrance of the house, the aroma of incense and the soft murmur of the wind chimes welcomed you. Swordfather navigated the familiar surroundings with ease, relying on the sounds and textures to guide him. Mizu led him to his usual spot, a serene corner where he could listen to the world around him.

Once seated, Swordfather leaned back, exhaling slowly. "Mizu, my ears tell me you've brought more than just stories back with you. There is something else in the air, a shift in the wind." 

Mizu hesitated for a moment, exchanging a knowing glance with you, as if silently communicating something that went beyond words. She smiled, a subtle yet genuine expression that betrayed the unspoken connection between you two.

"Yes, Swordfather," she replied, her voice carrying a warmth that echoed her feelings. "I've encountered more than just tales during my travels. Fate has intertwined our paths in unexpected ways." She gestured toward you, introducing you in a manner that went beyond a mere recounting of events.

Swordfather's sightless gaze seemed to linger in your direction, as if trying to perceive something beyond the physical. "The dance of destinies," he murmured, "A connection that goes beyond the surface. Tell me, what is it that draws you to Mizu? In the realm of the heart, there are melodies that even the blind can hear."

There was a moment of vulnerability, a shared recognition of the emotions that had blossomed during your journey together. You took a breath, choosing your words carefully.

"Swordfather, in Mizu, I've found a kindred spirit," you began, your voice steady. "Our journey has been more than just an adventure. It's been a discovery of shared dreams, a dance of two souls finding harmony. There's a connection that transcends the ordinary, a bond that defies explanation."

Swordfather listened intently, his expression unchanged but a subtle nod indicating his understanding.

"In this life, sometimes the heart knows paths the mind cannot fathom," Swordfather spoke, his words resonating with a deep understanding. "Cherish this connection. For in the echoes of your hearts, you may find the strength to face the challenges ahead."

As the conversation shifted, the atmosphere in the room carried a new depth, a sense of shared understanding that went beyond the spoken word. 

Just as the poignant moment settled, the shoji doors slid open with a sudden force. The ambient peace shattered as Taigen, stood in the doorway. His eyes scanned the room until they locked onto Mizu, who had been standing quietly beside you.

"Mizu!" Taigen exclaimed, his voice cutting through the hushed atmosphere. "We have unfinished business, you and I. A duel was promised, and I've come to collect."

"You again?" 

Taigen's eyes narrowed, his focus unwavering on Mizu. "Forgive me, Swordfather. But a promise demands satisfaction. Mizu, do not deny me what is rightfully mine."

Mizu stepped forward, her hand resting on the hilt of her sword. "I have not forgotten, Taigen. But do you have to be such a pain in the ass?” Taigen scoffed, unsheathing his blade with a sharp metallic ring. 

Taigen smirked, his eyes glinting with a mixture of determination and amusement. "A promise is a promise, and I intend to keep it. Are you ready to face the consequences of your words?"

You could feel the tension in the room rising, the air thick with anticipation. Mizu's lips curled into a sly grin. "Consequences? You make it sound like I'm about to face the wrath of the gods. It's just a friendly duel, isn't it?" Taigen chuckled, a low, throaty sound that echoed in the room. 

"Perhaps you've forgotten the sting of defeat. I'm here to remind you."

As the two wielders squared off, you couldn't help but sense the undercurrent of rivalry that went beyond the boundaries of a simple duel. Mizu and Taigen circled each other like predators in a dance, their blades gleaming in the soft light filtering through the shoji doors.

Unbeknownst to you, Mizu's usually composed demeanour was cracking under the pressure of Taigen's persistent comments, about you. Her eyes darted between him and you, an unreadable emotion flickering in their depths. It was then that Taigen, with a mischievous glint in his eye, decided to turn the tables.

"Ah," he said with a smirk, "I can't help but wonder if your heart is in this duel or if it's distracted by other matters." He shot a quick glance in your direction, his eyes locking onto yours for a moment too long. Mizu's face betrayed a hint of annoyance, her jaw clenched. 

"Focus on the duel, Taigen. I have no time for your theatrics."

But Taigen was relentless. As the clash of steel filled the room, he continued his banter. "I gotta admit, I didn't expect to find such captivating company here. Maybe there's more to this journey than meets the eye."

You could see Mizu's grip on her sword tighten, a flash of irritation crossing her features. It seemed Taigen's words were getting under her skin. The duel became not only a test of skill but also a battleground for unspoken emotions. 

Finally, with a swift move, Mizu disarmed Taigen and held her sword at his throat. The room fell into an uneasy silence, broken only by the heavy breaths of the combatants.

"Poor technique, easily learned," Mizu declared, her gaze cold. "Easily defeated."

As Mizu withdrew, she shot you a glance that carried a mix of frustration and something else— that lingered in the air. As Taigen retreated, she turned her attention back to you. The tension in the room lingered, thick like the scent of cherry blossoms on a cool breeze. The air crackled with unspoken words, and you could almost taste the lingering traces of the duel's emotional undertones.

As the shoji doors slid open, revealing the tranquil garden outside, Mizu stepped into the moonlit night. You followed suit, the night embraced them like a cloak, shadows dancing on their faces as they exchanged a few terse words.

"You're always so serious, Mizu," You teased, tone light as your hand reached to grasp her shoulder, tracing light patterns.

She turned to face you, her gaze softening under the moonlight. "I have to be serious. The world is not always forgiving." A hint of vulnerability peeked through the facade she usually wore. The tension from the duel seemed to linger, but now it was a different kind of tension—an electric charge that pulsed between you.

"Maybe," you said, stepping into the small distance between you, fingers gently tracing the line of her jaw, "but there's more to life than just battles and strife. Sometimes, it's about the moments we allow ourselves to savour."

The garden around you seemed to hold its breath, the only sound being the gentle rustle of leaves and the distant chirping of crickets. Mizu's gaze dropped for a moment before rising again, a hint of something more profound in her eyes.

"Sometimes, though, I wonder if there's room for a different kind of seriousness in my life," she admitted, her voice barely above a whisper.

The air became charged with an unexpected intimacy, and you found yourself drawn closer to Mizu. The scent of cherry blossoms intensified, wrapping around both of you like a delicate perfume. The moon illuminated her features, casting a soft glow that accentuated the vulnerability she rarely revealed.

"Perhaps there is," you murmured, your fingers gently tracing a strand of her hair. The tension in the air shifted from the remnants of the duel to an unspoken connection, an energy that pulsed between you.

Mizu's gaze locked onto yours, and in that moment, the world outside the garden seemed to fade away. The boundaries between, and the night became a canvas for something more profound. Without another word, she leaned in, and the touch of her lips against yours carried the weight of a thousand unspoken feelings.

Your lips, soft and familiar, sent a surge of warmth through her entire being. With every passing second, her breath grew more strained, muscles tensing in anticipation of your touch. Yielding to the magnetic pull between you, you allowed yourself to sink deeper into her embrace, the world outside fading away.

As her hands flattened against your spine, an electric current seemed to dance along her skin. Your hand, like a gentle breeze, found the curve of Mizu's neck, fingers starting a sensuous dance, caressing the delicate contours beneath. With each tender touch, a sigh of pleasure escaped her lips, intermingling with the shared breath of the moment.

Kissing her back, your lips traced a path of desire, leaving an indelible mark on the canvas of passion. The sensation of your fingers on her neck sent shivers down her spine, and a subtle smile played upon her lips, a silent acknowledgement of the intimate connection forged in that tender embrace.

A momentary pause lingered as the kiss continued, a shared symphony of desire. As you pulled away slightly, her gaze, infused with a delicate lightness, met yours. The air between you crackled with the unspoken, silent language of longing. Her breath, a soft melody, hung in the air, a testament to the lingering sensuality that bound you together.

[parkerslatte]

Deals With Our Devils || Chapter Three

Azriel x Fem!Reader

Word Count: 4.2k

Warnings: slight injury. blood.

Part Summary: Y/N has dinner with Cassian and Nesta while Azriel tells her how he felt when she disappeared.

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Y/N sat on her bed, the feeling of it familiar. It had been two centuries since she had sat on this bed and yet, it only felt like months. Her bags remained unpacked beside her bed as she looked around her old room. Her old clothes were still hung up in the wardrobe, all still immaculately cleaned as if someone had made sure they were kept pristine in the years she had been away. The belongings she had left behind were still in her drawers, as were the various weapons she had hidden in her room. Everything felt so familiar yet so distant at the same time.

It was a matter of hours before Y/N heard more movement in the house– specifically from the bedroom above hers, the one belonging to the shadowsinger himself. A wash of nostalgia flooded Y/N as she laid down on her bed. As she heard Azriel walk around upstairs, she remembered the nights when she would march up to his bedroom to scold him for walking too loud when she was trying to sleep. Of course it only ended in her sleeping in his room after a long night of talking and laughing with one another. 

She remembered the nights Azriel would come to her after a particularly hard mission or something had gone wrong. Y/N would sit with her arms around him for hours. Sometimes in complete silence, other times filled with Y/N’s voice simply talking to him to distract him. Y/N smiled at the bittersweet memory. 

As she laid on her bed, he mind shifted back to Vassuryn. She already missed Floris more than she thought she would. In the past two hundred years, there hadn’t been a time longer than a couple of months where they had been apart. Despite her being his guard, Floris was her best friend. 

There was a knock at Y/N’s door only moments later. She wasn’t expecting any knocks, in fact, Y/N wasn’t expecting any interaction at all. She stood from her bed and shuffled to the door, only realising until this moment how tired and drained she was from the journey. Once her hand touched the door handle, Y/N froze and her heart rate increased. What if it’s Azriel? She thought to herself. This thought was immediately disproved when she heard his footsteps from the room above. 

“Y/N.” Cassian’s voice was muffled through the door. “It’s me. Um, Nesta and I are having dinner if you want to join us.” 

Y/N’s hand remained on the door handle, though she made no move to open it. The hesitance in Cassian’s voice made the guilt rise in her body. 

In the past two-hundred years, Y/N had become quite content with her life. She had a good job, good friends and lived in a beautiful kingdom. But she always felt that particular feeling weighing her down whenever she found herself smiling with her friends or enjoying her day. She had now come to the realisation that that feeling was guilt. 

“You don’t need to join us if you don’t want to,” Cassian said. “But you are welcome.”

Y/N still didn’t open the door and listened as Cassian’s footsteps faded away. She let out a sigh once she was sure he was gone. While she had still been living in the Night Court, long before she left, Y/N had always thought of Cassian as a brother. Whenever she was having a bad day, she would sometimes seek him out for comfort. When she would train, he was always her sparring partner. And when she just wanted to get away from anything, he was there for her and would fly her anywhere in Velaris. It wasn’t until she had heard his voice, she realised how much she missed him.

With a final deep sigh, Y/N opened her bedroom door and stepped into the hall. 

***

Azriel was angry. He was sure he had never been so angry in his life. Y/N had shown up after two centuries and she didn’t even seem to care how much it had affected them all. Through her whole explanation he could feel that anger beginning to bubble over the surface, yet some still slipped through the cracks. 

Though he was angry for two reasons. 

The anger for the second reason wasn’t directed toward her– it was directed toward himself. Despite the way he felt about her return, Azriel fought the urge to pull her into his arms and bury his head into her neck and hold her for as long as she would allow. He hated that he felt that way. She had abandoned everyone, she had abandoned him. 

When Azriel left Y/N in the dining room, he left for the streets of Velaris. He couldn’t stand the thought of staying in his own room whilst Y/N was just in the room below. For years that room had stood empty, seeming locked in time. No one ever moved her things or changed the decoration. That room was off limits for everyone but Azriel, Cassian, Rhys, Mor and Amren. Azriel remembered how he once snapped at Elain for opening the door to her room years before. He apologised for it for days following. 

Azriel swore he didn’t miss her. He swore he didn’t think about her. And in complete honesty he hadn’t for the past century, he had mostly moved on and accepted that she wasn’t going to come back. Yet in the past century he still found himself sitting in her room sometimes, just to think. It was the one place he knew he could be truly alone. 

Azriel groaned as he let his mind slip to Y/N once again. I don’t care about her. He told himself that over and over again, he wanted to believe it but there was something stopping him. He could hear her movements in the room below. The room he was so accustomed to being silent. It was a strange adjustment. 

After Azriel heard her open yet another drawer, he finally stood to his feet and swiftly left his bedroom to go down to dinner, hoping that he could avoid Y/N for the duration of her trip. 

***

As Y/N stepped into the dining room, conversation ceased. Cassian and the female from before– Nesta, Cassian called her– sat at the dining table, eyes now on her. 

“You came,” Cassian said, a look of genuine surprise on his face. 

“I was feeling peckish,” Y/N admitted. “My journey here was long and there weren't many catering options available.”

Y/N took a seat at the table opposite both Cassian and Nesta. She tried to slow her heart beat but failed every single time. Cassian watched her movements carefully. Y/N tried to not let it affect her but she could see a sense of distrust in his eyes but another emotion was mixed with it. Nesta– who Y/N presumed was Cassian’s mate just by the way Y/N had interpreted their interactions– just watched her curiously. 

Food appeared in front of Y/N and she picked at it before lifting the fork to her mouth. It was just as delicious as she remembered. Even after all these years, the house still remembered her favourite meal. 

“Your name is Y/N?” Nesta spoke up, her fingers locked as she rested her head upon them, not eating the food in front of her. 

“Yes,” Y/N answered, lifting her gaze to meet Nesta’s. “Don’t wear it out.”

Nesta’s eyes narrowed and Y/N could see the power and authority she held within them. “The Y/N. The one who left in the middle of the night with no note or word.”

Y/N swallowed the carrot she had been eating and flicked her gaze between Nesta and Cassian. “Is this an interrogation or something? If it is, you would need many more sharp objects to get me to talk.”

Leaning back in her chair, Y/N rested her hand on her stomach. She still wore her travelling clothes and she itched to get into clean and fresh clothing. 

“If the only reason you invited me to dinner was to interrogate me, then I will happily leave,” Y/N said, lifting her glass of wine to her lips.

“We don’t want to interrogate you, Y/N,” Cassian said, looking at Nesta. 

“Well your little mate clearly wants to,” Y/N said, her gaze coming to rest on Nesta, who gripped her dinner knife in her hand tightly. 

Before Y/N could place her glass back on the table, Nesta threw the knife and it sore through the air, its target– Y/N. Cassian watched wide-eyed, unable to process the situation. 

However the knife never hit its target. Y/N simply held up her hand and the knife stopped mid-air, inches from her temple. “Are you trying to kill me, Nesta?”

“No,” Nesta replied, amusement shining in her eyes.

Y/N twisted her hand and the knife slowly rotated in the air and pointed to Nesta. Cassian growled as Y/N allowed the knife to inch toward Nesta until the tip rested centimetres from her temple. “You have guts to throw a knife at me. Back in Vassuryn, this knife would already be embedded in your skull.”

Y/N studied Nesta’s expression. She didn’t look scared at all, if anything she looked intrigued. Y/N smiled. “I like that.”

The knife clattered to the table and Nesta smiled. “I think I like you, Y/N.”

“It goes both ways, Nesta,” Y/N said. 

Cassian let out a sigh. “What was that?”

“From the stories you have told me about Y/N, I wanted to see what she would do,” Nesta said. “I was curious.”

“She could have killed you!” Cassian explained. 

“I trusted her not to,” Nesta said, smirking at Y/N. 

Cassian rubbed his brow and leaned back in his chair. “What a way to break the ice, Nes.”

Y/N let out a breathy laugh and placed the glass of wine back on the table. Cassian looked at Y/N and their eyes met. Even though Cassian did not physically look older, Y/N could see the age in his eyes. Two hundred years since she had seen him and in those two centuries there were thousands of stories that Y/N was unaware of. Guilt swirled within the depths of Y/N’s stomach. 

Cassian cleared his throat. “It’s really good to see you, Y/N. I’m sorry for the way I spoke to you earlier.”

“No, it was justified,” Y/N said. “I left all of you and you all thought I was dead. I was expecting much worse.”

“I’m glad you’re back,” Cassian said. “Even if it is just for a short time.”

“I’m glad to be back,” Y/N admitted. “Even though it is only for a short while.”

The door to the dining room was opened and the shadowsinger walked in, his face like thunder. Y/N fell silent. Azriel’s eyes scanned the room and landed on Y/N, he narrowed his eyes. From across her, Y/N could see Cassian and Nesta look between her and Azriel. She didn’t know what to say as Azriel walked further into the room, taking the seat a few down from Y/N.

“What is she doing here?” Azriel asked, his voice flat.

“I invited her to dinner,” Cassian stated. Azriel didn’t respond as he silently began to eat. 

Y/N broke her gaze away from Azriel. If he was just going to sit there silently, she could easily ignore him– even though she was fully aware that he was sitting only two chairs down from her. Once Y/N made eye contact with Cassian and Nesta again, she relaxed the smallest amount. 

“So, Nesta,” Y/N began, “you mentioned that Cassian had told you stories about me?”

Nesta seemed to light up while Cassian simply looked embarrassed. “He did,” Nesta answered. “He insisted that you were the best fighter he had ever known. Even better than him.”

“I didn’t say that–”

“You did,” Nesta dismissed. “He mentioned you during a training session years ago.”

Y/N hummed in amusement. “The best fighter you have ever known?”

“Nesta is twisting my words,” Cassian said, playfully glaring at her.

As Y/N opened her mouth to speak, Azriel cut her off, speaking to Cassian and Nesta as if she was not even there. “Are you training with the Valkyries tomorrow?”

Nesta shook her head. “Not tomorrow. Gwyn, Emerie and I are planning to read a new book that just came out. We’ve been excited about it for a while. Training can wait one day.”

Y/N lit up. “You read?”

“Yes!” Nesta said, perking up. “Gwyn, Emerie and I have our own little boom club of sorts.”

“What type of books do you read?” Y/N asked.

Cassian laughed. “Nothing that you would be interested in. They don’t read about battle strategies.”

Y/N frowned. “I think you are mistaking me for yourself, Cassian. I absolutely hated those books when you made me read them.”

Cassian gaped. “You said you enjoyed them!”

“I didn’t want to offend you!” Y/N defended. 

Nesta watched the exchange with amusement. “You are welcome to join us.”

Y/N’s smile faltered. “I would love to, but I don’t think I will have the time. I’m supposed to be here on business.”

“So you’ve said,” Azriel muttered under his breath. 

Y/N ignored him as she focused on Nesta. “But if I have the time, I’ll join you.”

“If you have the time, you are training with me,” Cassian butt in. “I want to see if that palace has been training you right. And none of that magic nonsense. This will be strictly hand to hand combat.”

Y/N smirked. “I hope you like being knocked on your arse, Cassian.”

“Really?” Azriel piped up, his voice full of barely controlled anger. 

The smile on Y/N’s face vanished instantly as she turned to Azriel. “What?”

“You are just slotting yourself back in when you have been gone for two centuries,” Azriel said. 

Across the table, Cassian and Nesta fell silent, watching the exchange between the two former friends. 

“What am I supposed to say, Azriel?” Y/N asked. 

Azriel shook his head and looked back down at his food that he had barely touched. Y/N scoffed. “Is that all then? You just provoke me and then ignore me?”

“I told you yesterday not to speak to me,” Azriel muttered.

“Yet you initiated the conversation!” Y/N exclaimed. “I genuinely don’t know what you want me to do Azriel.”

Y/N didn’t even process Azriel standing to his feet before he was walking out of the room. She knew that she should leave him but something within her made her race out of the room after him. 

“Don’t you dare walk away from me, Azriel,” Y/N snapped. 

“Leave, Y/N,” Azriel responded and continued to walk down the corridor. 

I won’t,” Y/N said, racing to catch up to his long strides. 

As she caught up to him, she reached out and gripped his wrist tightly. The feeling of his skin on hers was familiar yet so foreign. Azriel’s ripped his arm out of her grip and spun around. Y/N was sure she had never seen such anger in his eyes. Before she knew it, Azriel had pushed her against the wall, knocking the breath out of her. His shadows pinner her arms down by her sides, preventing her from moving. 

Y/N looked up to meet Azriel’s eyes. They were blazing with anger and frustration. The tip of a blade touched her neck and Y/N stilled. “You would really kill me, Azriel?” Y/N asked. 

The situation was nothing like the one with Nesta. With Nesta there had been a certain playfulness to it. This situation was far from it. It was fuelled by rage and frustration, not curiosity. Truthteller dug into Y/N’s skin the smallest amount and Y/N could feel a small drop of blood trickle down her neck and under her clothes. Y/N could feel her powers bubbling within her but she refused to let them show. 

Still, Y/N didn’t break eye contact with Azriel. The anger in his eyes was clear but Y/N could spot the emotion behind that fire. It was full of sadness and pain. 

“If you are going to kill me, Azriel, then do it,” Y/N said, her voice shaking. 

When Y/N had left two hundred years ago, she never would have imagined that two centuries later, Azriel would be holding her at knife point. 

“Why would you leave me, Y/N?” Azriel asked, his hand holding truthteller shook, causing another drop of blood to trickle down her neck. 

Y/N looked into his eyes. That raging fire within them dimmed and the pain and sadness was all that remained. 

“Those weeks after you left,” Azriel began, lowering the blade from her neck, “I expected you to show up at my door while I was recovering. Every single time Rhys, Cassian or Mor walked in, I was disappointed. I never let any of them help and change my bandages because you were always the one to do that. You wounded me, Y/N.”

Y/N stiffened under his firm hold. For a brief moment she broke eye contact. She had never thought her disappearance would have affected Azriel this much. 

“You left a wound on my heart when you left without a word. I mourned you. I believed you to be dead,” Azriel said. Even his voice now held that pain and sadness he had carefully hidden behind that barrier of rage and fury. 

Azriel pushed back from the wall and looked at Y/N, his eyes glancing down at the blood on her neck, he showed no emotion at it. “The sooner you arrange matters with Rhys, the sooner you can go back to your kingdom. I will remain civil with you until then for the sake of everyone around us. But just so you know, if Vassuryn ever needs help in the future, believe me when I tell you that I will not go to help. Once you leave here, Y/N, I never want to see you again. I have already mourned you, I will not do it again.”

With that, Azriel turned his back and walked down the corridor and out of sight. Y/N remained against the wall, she had made no effort to move. His words had cut her deeper than any blade ever would. Y/N’s breath came out in ragged pants and she tried to process everything that had just happened. With a shaky hand, she pressed it against where truthteller had been held against her skin. Her fingers came away bloody. 

“Y/N,” Cassian said softly.

Y/N looked up from her hand and her gaze rested on Cassian and Nesta, both with sympathetic expressions on their faces. 

“Are you okay?” Nesta asked. 

Y/N only glanced down the corridor where Azriel had disappeared and back to her hand.

“Did you see what happened?” Y/N asked, her voice quiet. 

Cassian shook his head. “Did Az do that?”

Y/N wiped the blood on her fingers onto her jacket. “Yes, but it's fine. I probably deserved it.”

As Cassian went to open his mouth, Y/N rushed past him. “I’m going to get an early night before my meeting with Rhys tomorrow. I will see you both later.”

Y/N continued on her way down the corridor and up the stairs until she made it to her bedroom. When she stepped inside, she didn’t feel the nostalgia she did when she stepped in it earlier. Instead she only felt dread. The quicker she sorted things out with Rhys, the quicker she could leave– and hopefully that was soon. 

***

The moment Azriel was out of sight, he let out a breath and slouched against the wall. The rage within him was not directed at Y/N anymore– it was directed at himself. Azriel could see the small amount of fear that presented itself in Y/N’s eyes when he held truthteller up to her neck. Azriel was not even sure what came over him, he was just so angry and frustrated at that moment. 

What made him hate himself even more was the wound he had inflicted upon her. In his whole life, Azriel had never inflicted a purposeful wound upon his friends. Yet he had on Y/N. 

Azriel shook his head and continued down the hallway. Y/N is not my friend. He thought. 

Yet he still felt the weight of the guilt upon his shoulders. That blood that trickled down her neck was caused by him. Before he would have burnt villages down if he even saw so much of a scratch upon her skin. This time, he was the cause. 

Azriel was not even sure where he was going. As soon as he left Y/N in the corridor, he had walked away, any second longer and he would be falling at her feet, begging for forgiveness. Azriel scoffed. He had nothing to be sorry for. Y/N is the one who should be sorry. She had abandoned him and her family only to find a new one in Vassuryn. They were apparently replaceable. 

The route Azriel walked was familiar to him, he had walked it hundreds of times before, even without meaning to. His feet led him down the corridor with now one occupant. Azriel slowed as he walked down it. Light shone from under Y/N’s door. Azriel came to a stop. 

For two centuries he was used to the room being vacant but now he knew that she resided inside once again, it made his heart skip a beat. Azriel silently listened. Y/N’s heartbeat was slow and steady, a clear indication that she was asleep. That was one thing that hadn’t changed about her. Before when Azriel fell asleep beside her, he would be eased into a sleep void of nightmares just from listening to her heartbeat. 

Despite himself, a ghost of a smile appeared on Azriel’s face. 

He was not sure what had overcome him when Azriel reached out and touched the door handle. Before he could stop himself he quietly pushed the door open and stepped into the room. The candles were burning on the dresser and Azriel stepped forward to blow them out. He tried not to look in Y/N’s direction but failed as he spared a quick glance.

In her sleep Y/N looked relaxed and it made Azriel’s chest tighten. Now he saw how much stress and worry she carried on her face. He assumes that some of that was caused by him. She was wearing a simple nightshirt and the blankets were bunched up at her waist, though Azriel could see the goosebumps littering her skin. 

His feet carried him closer to the bed and he reached out to touch the soft blanket bunched at her waist. Azriel recognised it as the gift Mor had given her for Solstice one year. It had been so long ago that Azriel had forgotten. He pulled it up until it rested below her chin. Y/N seemed to hum quietly at the added warmth to her body as she snuggled into the blanket. As she shifted, Azriel now had a clear view of the wound he had inflicted on her. It was healing but it was still an angry red. The blood had been washed away but Azriel could still see it in his mind. Like the blood, he wished he could wash it himself. 

Azriel stepped back and back away to where the candles were, the only reason why he had entered her room. He blew them out one by one until the room was plunged into darkness, the only light coming from the small gap in the curtains, shining directly onto Y/N’s face. 

Azriel lingered by the door for a moment longer. A singular shadow sneaking away to join Y/N at her bedside. Azriel hastily summoned it back and stepped out into the hallway and closed the door quietly behind him. He took off down the hallways and up to his bedroom. 

Once he was inside, Azriel sighed. He didn’t know why he did that. He didn’t care. 

I don’t care about Y/N. It was the mantra that Azriel said to himself. It was true. He wanted it to be true. He shouldn’t care about someone who abandoned him– her family. 

Azriel huffed and lowered himself to his bed. He didn’t care about Y/N. The sooner she left the better. But as he tried to fall asleep, the only thing on his mind was Y/N and that scared look in her eyes as he pointed his blade to her neck.

Azriel’s night was restless.

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[yaksha-lover]

I'm not sure if you're still taking requests but if you are, do you think you could write a short drabble about Malleus missing Yuu after they've gone home to the point of feeling haunted? Like the feeling is so immense and overwhelming to him that he feels unwell and everything reminds him of them. Just a lot of angst and stuff lol. I hope this ask was clear enough and thank you for taking the time to read it, I really love your writing!

Malleus dreams of you, most nights.

Sometimes of old memories, sometimes of futures that will never come to pass. It’s bittersweet, if not lovely, to distract himself with an illusion.

Sometimes he dreams the two of you aren’t who you are in this world; that maybe in another life you’re born into the same universe and he isn’t destined to be a king. That the two of you live a normal life together, just like anyone else.

He can’t fool himself for long. Something is always off; the specks of colour in your eyes not quite right or your smile vague. It only adds another layer of agony, forcing him to curse his own fallible memory when he realizes he is beginning to forget what you look like.

When he passes by the bench on campus where he’d told you a joke he’d stolen from Lilia and he realizes he can no longer recall the charming sound of your laughter, making his heart flutter almost painfully.

Even the gargoyles around Ramshackle dorm cannot entice him to walk that path again. It’s too much to see your former home, to let himself forget for a moment and knock on your door before remembering you will never be there to open it again.

Time, Lilia tells him. You will be okay. In time.

Even his guardian seems unconvinced by his own words, doing his best to comfort Malleus. He appreciates the sentiment, but the words are empty to him.

It seems inevitable that there’s something that will never quite be the same again in his world. No one else is you, after all. How can one recreate the exuberant feeling of swimming in the ocean with a mere puddle? The warmth and light of the sun with a campfire? Anything, no, anyone else simply pales in comparison, a cheap imitation which only serves to irritate him.

The others are worried about him, he can tell. Lilia comments when Malleus only picks at his plate during dinner time, trying to joke that he will loose his strength without sustenance. Silver gives his own words of concern, asking Malleus how he is doing. Sebek offers to make him any dish to return his appetite, vowing to do whatever it takes to keep him happy and healthy. For a moment, Malleus thinks of asking if Sebek will bring you home to him.

Sometimes he wonders if he made you up in his head. You were like an angel to him, a being so perfect that he could look at you and spend hours wondering how you were even real. Could it be his lonely imagination conjured some illusion to satiate him? To stop him from falling further and further into the depths of his own mind?

The only ones who seem to share in his grief are Grim and your two Heartslabyul friends. He’d never been the friendliest with them before, beyond basic curtesy, but he sometimes finds himself seeking them out now. It’s a bit comforting for Malleus to see that he is not the only one in the world who remembers you, nor the only one shaken by your absence.

Grim, perhaps, shares in his experience the most. The beast is uncharacteristically solemn, these days. He is the one who answers the door at Ramshackle when Malleus knocks. He supposes they give each other false hope, in that way. Malleus knocks, hoping that you’ll open the door. Grim opens it, hoping it’s you knocking.

He wants to be angry with you. For befriending him, for making him love you, for leaving him behind. But how can he? Falling in love was neither his choice nor your own. As for leaving him…it seems you did not feel the same, and that is not something he can fault you for.

You were his everything, but it seems he was just not worth leaving your own everything behind.

[randomfoggytiger]

Do you have a list of comfort fics? Not them comforting each other but for when you're feeling wrecked and you just need something lovely to make it better?

randomfoggytiger's Comfort Fics

I'm not joking: I've reread more fics than I'll ever read new ones. My usual routine is to pop open Google docs, select an author, and mow down their list.

These three pieces were the ones that started it all; but I forgot to include @seek-its-opposite's photosensitivity. A+s, all of 'em.

Authors that I can't single out comfort fics from and can't tag because Tumblr is restricting my tag options: @baronessblixen, @settle-down-frohike, @onpaperfirst, @markwatneyandenesemble, Lapsed_Scholar, Apostrophic, @ghostbustermelanieking, @o6666666, touchstoneaf, @welsharcher, @scenes-in-between, @mldrgrl, @spooky-nerd, @melforbes, etc.

**Note**: Will ghost edit later~

PART I

Bittersweet Comfort Fics

misslucyjane's Scully seeks insomnia advice from Mulder, and Mulder dies, then lovingly watches Scully live the rest of her life

Kipler's cancer arc set casefile involving WWII vets and letters

melforbes's cancer arc Mulder takes his new bride to the sea for her last spring, and Pre-IWTB Mulder and Scully finally have a home

MldrItsMe's AU Redux II Scully is REALLY suffering, and Sein und Zeit Mulder's suicidal confessions

@discordantwords's Mulder and Scully are almost killed by the Fiji mermaid

mixiz877's Mulder and Scully fight off a gryphon

@fbismostunwanted1158's Scully is beaten down ala Stella Gibson in The Fall

Joyce's S5 AU Mulder is killed, comes back to life to save Scully, and Mulder dies but stays as Scully's partner solving cases with her (Part 1, Part 2, and-- my favorite of the three-- its Halloween sequel)

@teethnbone's post Travelers fic with Mulder and Scully

@sarie-fairy's AU Tithonus love confession, Post Milagro Scully realizing what it feels like to be Mulder, and Post The Unnatural Scully is bleeding out on a failed Sasquatch hunt

@sigritandtheelves's Post Monday Scully remembers Mulder's death

whatliesabove's Post Milagro Scully stays dead (or does she?)

ChaneenW's Pre-IVF arc Mulder is shot into a parallel timeline, reliving the Small Potatoes adventure with Scully

dee_ayy's post Amor Fati recovery fic (with baseball)

@bohoartist's Sein und Zeit through Scully's eyes, and Post Closure Scully rescues a photo of baby Mulder

Lolabeegood's AU where S8 Mulder is returned with false memories (would also recommend Lolabee's IWTB era fics, btw.)

@dreamingofscully's AU S9 Skinner entices Mulder back into profiling... and it doesn't end well

@television-overload's Pre-IWTB Mulder surprises Scully with a baseball field (and his old self again)

@queeenpersephone's AU where IWTB Scully stuck it out with Mulder

@danascullysjournal's Post IWTB bonding fic between a discouraged Mulder and uplifting Scully

@kateyes224's Mulder and Scully content in their UH, and Mulder sells the UH, and Scully buys it

@realmofextremepossibility's Breakup Mulder waiting for Scully's return Part I and Part II.

vulcanscully's Post Breakup Scully stops hearing from Mulder and assumes the worst

enigmaticdr's AU post IWTB Scully thinks she has cancer again (she's pregnant), Breakup Mulder is defeated at their anniversary dinner, AU where Revival Scully gets cancer, and The Revival baby laughs for the first time

prufrockslove's AU Mulder is a Welsh prince, Scully is his betrothed bride, and lots of Prince John high court drama ensues (part I of a sweeping, interconnecting AU series)

Thanks for reading~

Enjoy!

[rafesapologist]

the setback ─ rafe cameron; part eight

summary: it's been two years since your departure from the outer banks and rafe cameron has seemingly convinced himself that he can go on with his life as if you never happened, except now more than ever his addiction is at an all time high. whether he was snorting lines of cocaine at wild parties or drowning himself in alcohol to numb the pain, rafe couldn't escape the memories of you. despite his efforts to bury his feelings, your absence lingered like a shadow, haunting him at every turn. meanwhile, you've been navigating life outside the outer banks, trying to carve out a new path for yourself. but no matter how far you've traveled, the memories of rafe cameron still linger in your heart, leaving you with a sense of unfinished business. as you find yourself facing new challenges and opportunities, you can't help but wonder if fate will eventually bring you back to the place where it all began.

warnings: swearing, angst, mentions of infedelity

As you woke up, an unbearable throbbing ache in your head greeted you, causing you to groan in discomfort. You instinctively shoved your face into the pillow, seeking refuge from the harsh sunlight that only seemed to intensify the pain. Your body felt miserably sore, as though you had been hit by a truck during the night.

Slowly, you forced yourself to sit up, grimacing at the sharp pain that shot through your temples. Blinking away the haze of sleep, you glanced around the room, trying to take in your surroundings. As you noticed a glass of water on the bedside table, a wave of gratitude washed over you. With a sigh of relief, you reached out and grabbed the glass, feeling an overwhelming sense of thirst as if you hadn't had water in months.

Without hesitation, you chugged the water greedily, each sip feeling like a lifeline after a painfully long drought. The cool liquid soothed the dryness in your throat and helped to alleviate the pounding in your head, if only slightly.

With each gulp, you felt a renewed sense of energy coursing through your body, pushing back against the fatigue and discomfort that had plagued you moments before. And as you emptied the glass, you couldn't help but feel a sense of gratitude for the simple yet profound relief that water had provided.

As you placed the cup back down quietly, you glanced around the room, your eyes widening as you spotted Rafe on the side of the room, nestled on the futon. His arms were crossed, and his head rested on a single decorative pillow.

A pang of sympathy washed over you as you observed him. You couldn't help but imagine how uncomfortable he must have been, sleeping on that futon with its sparse cushions, especially given his tall stature. It was clear that he had sacrificed his own comfort to ensure that you had a proper place to sleep.

As you nestled back against the headboard, your eyes wandered around the sunlit room, illuminated by the soft morning light filtering in through the window. Memories of your past flashed before you, each one accompanied by a bittersweet ache in your heart.

You couldn't help but think back to the times you had spent in this room with Rafe, the nights that stretched into the early hours of the morning as you sought refuge in each other's company. The countless movie marathons, the whispered conversations, the shared laughter – it all came flooding back to you, filling the room with a sense of nostalgia and longing.

As you gazed out the balcony window, lost in the silence of your thoughts, guilt and nostalgia gnawed at your subconscious. The memories of the past weighed heavily on your mind, leaving you feeling conflicted and uncertain about the path ahead.

Lost in your contemplation, you were taken by surprise when you noticed Rafe beginning to stir on the futon. His movements were slow and deliberate, as though he was gradually awakening from a deep slumber. You watched quietly as he groaned softly, his eyes fluttering open with a sense of drowsy reluctance.

For a moment, you remained still, observing him with a mixture of curiosity and apprehension. It had been a while since you had seen him like this, vulnerable and unguarded in the early hours of the morning.

As he blinked away the remnants of sleep, his gaze met yours, and a flicker of recognition crossed his features. You offered him a small, tentative smile, unsure of how he would react to seeing you awake.

"Morning," you greeted softly, breaking the silence that hung between you.

"Morning," Rafe greeted with a groan as he rubbed his eyes awake, his morning voice fully prominent. The sound made butterflies erupt in your stomach, a familiar sensation that brought a sense of warmth to your cheeks.

"How do you feel?" he asked, peering over at you with a hint of concern in his eyes, which squinted as they struggled to fully open.

You offered him a small smile, trying to push aside the lingering discomfort from the throbbing ache in your head. "Not the best, but I'll survive," you replied, trying to sound nonchalant despite the lingering effects of last night's revelry.

Rafe nodded in understanding, his expression softening with sympathy. "Yeah, I know the feeling," he admitted with a small chuckle, the sound melodic and soothing to your ears. As you watched him, a sense of familiarity washed over you, reminding you of the countless mornings you had spent together in the past. Despite the time that had passed, there was still a comfort in his presence that you couldn't deny.

"Thank you for the water, by the way. My head is killing me," you said, offering Rafe a small smile of gratitude.

Rafe nodded sympathetically, understanding the discomfort all too well. "Of course, I figured you might need it," he replied, his voice gentle and reassuring.

As you sat in silence, you found yourself gazing at Rafe in his vulnerable state of half-awakeness. His tousled bedhead somehow looked effortlessly stylish, adding to his rugged charm. You admired the contour of his chiseled face, the subtle lines that spoke of a life lived with intensity and purpose. And despite the disheveled appearance, there was a certain allure to him, a magnetism that drew you in and made it hard to look away.

You couldn't help but notice the contrast between his appearance now and the memories of him from years past. Time had changed him, sculpting him into a man with a quiet strength and undeniable charisma. And as you studied him, a sense of nostalgia washed over you, reminding you of the bond that had once existed between you.

With a soft sigh, you tore your gaze away, feeling a flutter of emotions stir within you. Despite the uncertainties of the future, one thing was certain – the history between you and Rafe was still as potent as ever, a reminder of the deep bond that had once bound you together.

"I can take you back to your place if you want, or I can have Sarah come get you. Whichever you feel more comfortable with," Rafe offered, his voice gentle and considerate.

"Shit, Sarah," you panicked, remembering that you left without notice last night, wondering if she knew the circumstances. "Did you talk to her?"

Rafe shook his head, his expression apologetic. "No, I haven't had a chance yet. But I can text her and let her know you're okay," he offered.

Your heart raced as you anticipated Sarah's response, wondering if she would be more upset about you leaving abruptly or the fact that you were with Rafe. You watched as Rafe typed out his message to his younger sister, your mind racing as you dreaded the worst to come.

After what felt like an eternity, Rafe finally hit send, and you held your breath as you waited for Sarah's reply. The seconds ticked by slowly, each one filled with a mounting sense of anxiety as you braced yourself for her reaction.

Finally, a notification pinged on Rafe's phone, and you both looked at the screen anxiously. As Rafe read the message, you held your breath, waiting for him to share the news.

"She said she's coming to get you," Rafe read out the text, the response simple and short.

The brevity of Sarah's message sent a pang of worry through you, and you couldn't help but feel a knot form in your stomach. Was she upset? Did she suspect something?

Rafe noticed your unease and placed a comforting hand on your shoulder. "Hey, don't worry. She just wants to make sure you're okay," he reassured you, his voice gentle and reassuring.

You nodded, trying to push aside your fears and trust that Sarah's intentions were genuine. "Yeah, you're right," you replied, forcing a smile.

"Hey, it's gonna be okay," Rafe restated, his voice calm and reassuring as he held out his arm towards you. He placed his hand on your thigh, offering a comforting squeeze.

You felt a sense of warmth flood through you at his touch, and you couldn't help but lean into it, finding solace in his presence. "Thanks, Rafe," you murmured, grateful for his reassurance.

Rafe gave you a reassuring smile, his eyes meeting yours with unwavering support. "Sarah isn't gonna do anything. Trust me," he added, his voice filled with conviction.

With a nod, you took a deep breath, allowing yourself to trust in Rafe's words. Despite the lingering unease in your stomach, you knew that Sarah was truly the more understanding one of the Pogues, aside from Kiara. She never really held grudges and you found that you could confide in her about practically anything, even your darkest secrets. So you figured, this shouldn't be any different, right?

Your stomach churned in a nauseating way, the discomfort making you feel hot and clammy. Each passing minute felt like an eternity as you waited in Rafe's room for Sarah to arrive. Despite Rafe's reassurances, you couldn't shake the feeling of unease that gnawed at you from the inside out.

You had to admit, you were definitely assuming the worst-case scenario, bracing yourself for a potential confrontation with Sarah. It was a symptom of your own anxiety, the fear of what might happen feeding into your racing thoughts and escalating worries.

With each passing moment, the tension in the room seemed to grow thicker, suffocating you in its grip. You tried to distract yourself, focusing on anything other than the impending conversation with Sarah. But no matter how hard you tried, the anxiety lingered, a constant weight pressing down on your chest.

As you sat in silence, lost in your own thoughts, you couldn't help but wish for the minutes to pass by faster, dreading the inevitable confrontation that lay ahead. All you could do was brace yourself for whatever might come, hoping that you would find the strength to face it head-on when the time came.

As the minutes dragged on, each one feeling heavier than the last, you found yourself grappling with a mix of emotions – fear, anticipation, and a lingering sense of regret. The air in the room felt charged with tension, making it hard to focus on anything other than the impending conversation with Sarah.

Rafe's presence beside you offered a small measure of comfort, his reassuring touch a reminder that you weren't facing this alone. You drew strength from his silent support, grateful for his unwavering presence in this moment of uncertainty.

Finally, the sound of footsteps echoing down the hallway broke the suffocating silence, signaling Sarah's arrival. Your heart leaped into your throat, a rush of adrenaline coursing through your veins as you braced yourself for what was to come.

The door creaked open, and Sarah stepped into the room, her expression a mix of concern and relief as she laid eyes on you. "Hey, there you are," she greeted softly, her voice carrying a hint of worry.

You offered her a weak smile, trying to mask the nerves that churned in your stomach. "Hey, Sarah," you replied, your voice barely above a whisper.

Rafe shifted beside you, his presence a silent reassurance as Sarah's gaze flickered between the two of you, her brow furrowing in confusion. "What's going on? Are you okay?" she asked, her concern deepening as she took in the scene before her.

You hesitated, unsure of how to begin explaining the events of last night and the complicated emotions that accompanied them. But before you could find the words, Rafe spoke up, his voice steady and calm.

"We had a rough night. But everything's okay now," he reassured Sarah, his tone firm yet gentle.

Sarah's eyes widened in understanding, her expression softening with relief.

"How did you end up leaving with him, y/n?" Sarah's voice was gentle but insistent, her concern palpable.

You swallowed hard, grappling with how to explain the tangled mess of emotions that had led you to make such a decision. "I... It's complicated," you began, struggling to find the right words.

Sarah's expression softened, a mix of understanding and curiosity in her eyes. "Complicated how?" she pressed, her tone encouraging you to open up.

You hesitated, unsure of how much to reveal, but knowing you couldn't avoid the question entirely. "I just needed some time to clear my head," you admitted, hoping it would suffice as an explanation.

Sarah studied you for a moment, her gaze searching your face for any hint of the truth. "And you thought leaving with Rafe was the best way to do that?" she asked, her skepticism evident.

Guilt gnawed at you as you struggled to find the right response. "I know it probably wasn't the best choice," you confessed, regret weighing heavily in your voice. "But in the moment, it felt like the right thing to do."

Sarah's voice faltered, her brows knitting together in confusion. "Y/n... I don't know what to say. I mean, JJ could've come and got you. I don't understand-"

Before Sarah could finish her sentence, Rafe interjected, his voice calm but firm. "Well, I was already at the party, and she wasn't feeling well, so I brought her back here."

Sarah's sudden shift in demeanor caught you off guard, her irritation palpable as she directed her gaze towards Rafe. "Yeah, well, thanks Rafe, but I've got it from here," she said curtly, her tone laced with annoyance.

Rafe's expression remained unreadable, but you could sense a hint of tension in the air as he nodded in acknowledgment. "Sure thing, Sarah," he replied, his voice neutral.

You felt a pang of guilt at the abruptness of your departure, wishing there was a way to convey your gratitude to Rafe for his hospitality. With a quick glance in his direction, you offered him a silent apology, hoping he would understand.

As Sarah motioned for you to leave with her, you stood up quickly, eager to follow her lead. With one last look at Rafe, a silent farewell hanging in the air, you turned and followed Sarah out of the room, leaving behind the lingering tension and uncertainty.

You hurried down the steps of Rafe's house, your footsteps echoing in sync with Sarah's brisk pace. The urgency in her movements matched the intensity of her frustration, and you could feel the tension radiating off her in waves.

The front door slammed shut behind you with a resounding thud, the sound punctuating the gravity of the situation. You both reached John B's van simultaneously, and Sarah wasted no time in sliding into the driver's seat, her jaw set with determination.

You followed suit, settling into the passenger seat as Sarah's hands tightened around the steering wheel. Her knuckles turned white with the force of her grip, her gaze fixed firmly on the road ahead as she navigated the streets with practiced ease.

"What the hell were you thinking?" Sarah's voice was sharp, her tone cutting through the silence with unyielding force.

You winced at the intensity of her words, knowing you deserved every bit of her anger. "I don't know, Sarah. It was stupid," you admitted, your voice tinged with regret.

Sarah's grip on the steering wheel tightened even further, her frustration palpable as she glanced over at you. "Stupid doesn't even begin to cover it, y/n. You could've gotten hurt. I mean, what business do you even have with Rafe?" She scolded, her concern underlying her anger.

You nodded, unable to refute her words. "I know, Sarah. I'm sorry," you apologized, feeling the weight of your actions pressing down on you like a heavy burden.

Sarah sighed heavily, her anger beginning to soften as she turned her gaze back to the road. "I just... I worry about you, y/n. You mean a lot to me, and I don't want to see you get hurt," she confessed, her voice softening with genuine concern.

Guilt gnawed at you, knowing you had caused Sarah unnecessary worry and stress. "I know, Sarah. And I'm sorry for making you worry," you said, your voice filled with sincerity.

Sarah glanced over at you, a hint of a smile playing at the corners of her lips. "Just promise me you won't do something like that again, okay? I don't think my heart can take it," she said, her tone softening with affection.

You nodded, feeling a sense of gratitude wash over you for Sarah's unwavering support. "I promise, Sarah. I won't do anything reckless like that again," you vowed, knowing you couldn't bear to see her worried or upset because of your actions.

"So, on a serious note, did something happen with you and Rafe? Because... there's no way you just miraculously ended up back at his house. I mean, the other day you practically loathed him," Sarah's voice was filled with a mixture of concern and curiosity, her words cutting through the tension in the air.

Your heart skipped a beat at Sarah's direct question, your mind racing to find a plausible explanation for your sudden appearance at Rafe's house. The truth was far more complicated than you could ever convey, and you found yourself grappling with the guilt of keeping her in the dark about your tangled history with Rafe.

"I just... ran into him, I guess," you began, your voice hesitant as you struggled to find the right words. "We talked for a minute, and he gave me a ride back because I wasn't feeling well."

Your explanation felt flimsy even to your own ears, and you couldn't help but feel the weight of Sarah's scrutiny bearing down on you. The truth was far more complicated than you could ever convey, and you found yourself grappling with the guilt of keeping her in the dark about your tangled history with Rafe.

Sarah's brow furrowed in disbelief, her expression a mix of skepticism and concern. "So, what, you just happened to bump into him and suddenly everything's fine?" she pressed, her tone incredulous.

You shifted uncomfortably in your seat, feeling the weight of Sarah's questioning gaze bearing down on you. "It's not like that, Sarah. We just... talked," you insisted, your voice tinged with defensiveness.

Sarah's laughter caught you off guard, her tone unexpectedly light despite the weight of her previous questions. "Look, as much as I love JJ, you were my friend first. So if you think I'm gonna tell him anything, you're wrong," Sarah chuckled softly, shaking her head in amusement. "And I know when you're lying. So tell me," she urged, her tone gentle yet insistent.

You hesitated for a moment, a knot forming in your stomach as you kept your gaze down, your hands fidgeting nervously in your lap. You could feel Sarah's eyes on you, waiting patiently for your response as you mustered up the courage to tell her the truth.

"We... kissed," you finally confessed, the words tumbling out in a rush as you braced yourself for Sarah's reaction.

There was a beat of silence, and you could feel Sarah's surprise palpable in the air. When she spoke, her voice was barely a whisper, filled with disbelief. "You and Rafe... kissed?" she echoed, her tone a mixture of shock and uncertainty.

You nodded slowly, finally meeting Sarah's gaze as you searched her expression for any sign of judgment or reproach. Instead, you found only a flicker of understanding in her eyes, tempered by a hint of concern.

"Yeah," you confirmed softly, the weight of your confession hanging heavy in the air between you.

Sarah took a moment to process your words, her brow furrowing in thought as she searched for the right response. "I... I see," she murmured finally, her voice tinged with uncertainty.

"I know that sounds terrible, but it was just a heat-of-the-moment thing, and when I ran into him, all these emotions came back, and I just..." you trailed off, struggling to find the right words to explain the whirlwind of emotions that had led to the kiss.

"Y/n, it's okay," Sarah interrupted gently, cutting through your self-reproach. "I mean, I don't love the idea of you and Rafe considering he's insane, but I also know you can't control what your heart wants."

Her words offered a balm to your guilt-stricken conscience, and you felt a wave of gratitude wash over you for her understanding. "Thank you, Sarah," you murmured, feeling the weight of your confession beginning to lift.

Sarah gave your shoulder another reassuring squeeze, her expression soft with empathy. "Hey, we all make mistakes. What matters is how we handle them," she said, her voice filled with wisdom beyond her years.

You returned Sarah's small smile, a flicker of gratitude passing between you before you averted your gaze to the passenger window. The scenery outside blurred as the van navigated the winding roads of the Outer Banks, the rhythmic hum of the engine lulling you into a sense of calm.

Lost in your thoughts, you found yourself watching the world pass by in a blur of greenery and coastal vistas. The wind whipped through your hair, carrying with it the salty scent of the ocean and the promise of adventure.

Despite the weight of the conversation with Sarah, you couldn't help but feel a sense of peace settle over you as you rode back to the chateau. There was something comforting about the familiarity of the landscape, the way the sunlight danced across the waves and the seagulls soared overhead.

｡ﾟ•┈୨♡୧┈• ｡ﾟ

"Just be chill when you go in," Sarah advised sincerely as she shut the van engine off, "you know JJ can read you like a book."

"Yeah," you let out a half-hearted laugh through your nose, nodding in agreement at Sarah's point, "he's good at that. It's a blessing and a curse I guess." You sighed, bracing yourself for your entrance into the chateau while you unbuckled your seatbelt wearily, trying to stall as much as possible.

You knew that you could easily conceal yourself from JJ's inquisitions, but you couldn't escape your own guilt from what happened the night before. Despite your attempts to rationalize it, part of you couldn't shake the whirlwind of emotions that had flooded back when you ran into Rafe at the party.

As you approached the chateau, you couldn't shake the feeling of apprehension that gnawed at your insides. Each step felt heavier than the last, the weight of your guilt pressing down on you like a burden you couldn't shake.

Sarah walked beside you, her presence a source of comfort in the face of uncertainty. She offered you a reassuring smile, a silent reminder that you weren't alone in this.

"Just remember to breathe," she whispered, her voice barely above a murmur as you reached the front door of the chateau. "You've got this."

You nodded, drawing in a deep breath to steady your nerves before pushing open the door and stepping inside. The familiar sights and sounds of the chateau greeted you, but there was an underlying tension in the air that you couldn't ignore.

JJ was lounging on the couch, his gaze flicking up as you entered the room. There was a knowing look in his eyes, a silent acknowledgment of the unspoken turmoil that lingered between you.

"Hey," he greeted casually, his tone betraying none of the curiosity that you knew lay beneath the surface.

"Hey," you replied, trying to keep your voice steady despite the butterflies that churned in your stomach.

Sarah gave you a supportive pat on the back before slipping away, leaving you to face JJ alone. You watched her go with a sense of gratitude, knowing that you would need her support now more than ever.

Turning back to JJ, you braced yourself for the inevitable questions that would follow. But as you met his gaze, you couldn't help but feel a glimmer of hope that maybe, just maybe, you could navigate this minefield of emotions without causing too much damage.

JJ's casual demeanor belied the intensity of his curiosity as he lounged on the couch, his gaze fixed on you expectantly. "So, where did you end up crashing after the party?" he asked, his tone casual yet tinged with a hint of curiosity.

You felt a twinge of panic shoot through you at JJ's question, scrambling to come up with a believable lie to cover your tracks. "Oh, uh, I just crashed at a friend's place nearby," you replied, hoping your voice sounded convincing enough.

JJ raised an eyebrow, clearly not entirely convinced by your answer. "Which friend?" he pressed, his gaze searching yours for any sign of deception.

You racked your brain for a name, any name, that might sound plausible in this situation. "Um, Sarah's friend," you improvised, hoping JJ wouldn't see through your hastily concocted lie.

JJ nodded slowly, seemingly satisfied with your response. "Alright, cool," he said, his tone casual as he leaned back against the couch. "Just making sure you didn't end up sleeping on the beach or something."

You let out a nervous laugh, relieved that JJ seemed to buy your explanation. "Nope, nothing like that," you replied, trying to sound nonchalant despite the guilt that still gnawed at you from the events of the previous night.

After a moment of silence, JJ turned to you, his expression serious yet tinged with a hint of vulnerability. "Hey, y/n, can we talk for a moment?" he asked, his voice soft yet filled with a sense of urgency.

You nodded, a knot forming in your stomach as you braced yourself for whatever JJ had to say. "Of course, JJ. What's on your mind?" you replied, trying to keep your voice steady despite the unease that churned within you.

JJ hesitated for a moment, as if struggling to find the right words. "I know this might sound silly, but... I couldn't help but notice that you've seemed a bit off lately," he admitted, his gaze searching yours for any sign of understanding.

Your heart skipped a beat at JJ's words, a surge of panic rising within you as you wondered what he had noticed. "What do you mean?" you asked, trying to keep your tone casual despite the fear that coiled in the pit of your stomach.

JJ sighed, running a hand through his hair in frustration. "I don't know, it's just... you've been distant, and I worry about you," he confessed, his voice trailing off as he struggled to articulate his thoughts.

You swallowed hard, trying to push down the rising tide of guilt that threatened to consume you. "I'm sorry, JJ. I didn't mean to worry you," you replied, your voice tinged with regret.

After a moment of silence, JJ's voice cut through the air, his tone gentle yet filled with concern. "Y/n, I need to ask you something, and I want you to be honest with me. Is this about Rafe?"

You tensed up at JJ's question, your heart pounding in your chest as you stared at him in shock. How could he have possibly known? Your mind raced as you struggled to come up with a response, your thoughts spiraling out of control.

"Uh... I..." you stammered, your voice faltering as you searched for the right words to say.

JJ's expression softened, his gaze steady as he waited patiently for your answer. "Y/n, you can tell me," he said gently, his voice filled with empathy. "I just want to help."

You felt a surge of emotions welling up inside you – guilt, fear, uncertainty. How could you possibly explain the tangled mess of feelings that had been swirling around inside you ever since that day Rafe had shown up at the chateau looking for Sarah?

You shrugged off JJ's concern, trying to downplay the significance of his question. "Nah, JJ, you're overthinking it," you replied, forcing a casual tone despite the turmoil brewing inside you. "It's nothing, really."

JJ studied you for a moment, his gaze searching yours for any sign of deception. "Are you sure?" he asked, his tone cautious yet persistent.

You nodded quickly, plastering on a reassuring smile. "Yeah, JJ, I'm sure," you insisted, hoping he would drop the subject.

"I just... worry you have feelings for him still. I can't just forget the history you two had." He stared over at you, although you avoided his gaze intently.

You felt a knot tighten in your stomach at JJ's words, his concern striking a nerve deep within you. "JJ, come on," you replied, your voice tinged with frustration. "That's ancient history. I'm over him, I promise."

But even as the words left your mouth, you couldn't shake the lingering doubts that gnawed at you from the inside out. No matter how hard you tried to convince yourself otherwise, there was still a part of you that couldn't let go of the past – of the memories, the feelings, the connection that had once bound you to Rafe.

You could sense the persistence in JJ's tone, his concern unwavering despite your attempts to brush it off. "Y/n, I just want you to know that you can tell me anything," he said earnestly, his eyes searching yours with genuine care. "I'm here for you, no matter what."

But the weight of JJ's words only served to intensify the turmoil brewing inside you, a tempest of guilt, fear, and uncertainty that threatened to consume you whole. "Damn it, JJ!" you snapped, unable to contain the frustration that boiled over within you. "I said I'm fine, okay? I don't need you interrogating me like this."

JJ recoiled slightly at your outburst, his expression a mixture of surprise and hurt. "Y/n, I'm not trying to interrogate you," he protested, his voice tinged with hurt. "I'm just worried about you."

You felt a pang of guilt shoot through you at the sight of JJ's wounded expression, knowing that you had lashed out at him unfairly. Taking a deep breath, you tried to reign in your emotions, but the turmoil still churned inside you like a stormy sea.

"JJ, you don't need to worry," you said firmly, trying to regain control of the conversation. "I appreciate your concern, I really do, but I can't function with you harping on about a relationship that doesn't exist anymore," you affirmed although you knew you were lying through your teeth.

Your words hung heavy in the air, the weight of them pressing down on both of you like a lead blanket. You could see the hurt in JJ's eyes, a flicker of pain that mirrored your own inner turmoil.

"I didn't mean to upset you, y/n," JJ replied, his voice soft with remorse. "I just... I care about you, and I don't want to lose you."

You sighed, the tension in your shoulders easing slightly as you softened towards JJ's genuine concern. "I know, JJ, and I appreciate that," you said, your voice tinged with sincerity. "But you have to trust me when I say that I'm okay. I've moved on from whatever was between me and Rafe."

JJ nodded slowly, seeming to accept your words even as doubt lingered in his eyes. "Okay, y/n," he said quietly, his voice tinged with uncertainty. "I trust you."

As you glanced over at JJ once more, a pang of guilt washed over you like a tidal wave. You knew deep down that you weren't being completely honest with him. The truth gnawed at you, clawing at the corners of your mind, begging to be set free. But you couldn't bring yourself to do it – couldn't bring yourself to admit the tangled mess of emotions that still lingered between you and Rafe.

The guilt weighed heavily on your shoulders, a heavy burden that threatened to suffocate you with every passing moment. You knew that JJ shouldn't trust you around Rafe – not after everything that had happened, not after the way your heart still ached at the mere thought of him. But you couldn't bear to hurt JJ – couldn't bear to see the hurt and betrayal reflected in his eyes.

He was more than just a friend to you – he was your confidant, your partner in crime, the one person you could always count on to be there for you, no matter what. And the thought of losing that – of losing him – was too much to bear.

So you pushed aside your guilt, burying it deep beneath the surface where no one could see. You plastered on a smile, hoping to mask the turmoil that churned inside you like a stormy sea. And as you sat beside JJ, surrounded by the warmth of his friendship and the comfort of the chateau, you couldn't help but feel a sense of sadness wash over you – a sadness born of the secrets you were forced to keep and the lies you had to tell to protect the ones you loved.

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[superblysubpar]

I Was Next To You, And You Were Right There Next To Me:

a best friends to lovers story - steve harrington x fem!reader

steve & reader's playlist | summertime magic masterlist

9.7k words

warnings: see masterlist for general warnings about reader plus she's established as not a fan of camping in this chapter - PS if you don’t know what a koosh is you are too young to read this - 18+ only babes! | nothing too crazy this chapter - mentions of alcohol and drugs being used / illusions and talk of masturbation / slight graphic warning about injuries (descriptions of blood and scary things and what not - this part is kind of angsty and ends not so fun, it might get your heart beating so sorry...)

📻 Now Playing: Brandy (You're A Fine Girl) by Looking Glass

"...already almost 80 degrees out and only growing hotter, folks! I don't know about you but I cannot wait for Newby Waterpark to open on Monday! Hawkins' newly renovated downtown is sure to bring in..."

Radio nudged lower as you sigh, flopping onto your pile of clothes that lay atop your baby blue comforter. The familiar tick and spray of a sprinkler outside mingles with children's laughter, the wheels of skateboards and bikes kicking up gravel. The grind of a lawn mower wafts the fresh scent of the cut grass through your window. Yellow curtains flutter in the warm breeze and the lilacs from the Harrington's backyard linger in the air. 

The sun is just rising, those cotton candy pink and sherbert oranges breaking through the white puffs of clouds above the homes that line the already bustling neighborhood that sits along Cornwallis.  

Summer - the first official day of it.

Your last summer in Hawkins for the foreseeable future most likely, and you're spending it working. It is important, you know this, a summer job is needed to show future employers that you didn’t spend your summer sitting on your ass - that you had ambition and drive and all the buzzwords. But how are you having to make adult choices like this? What happened to carefree summers filled with melting popsicles and no schedule other than the movie theater’s? How does it all look the same but feel completely different?

The embroidered daisies on your comforter are frayed, older, and have lost a bit of their shimmer like the girl who resides beneath them every night. Your walls are littered with the past, with memories and reminders of what could have been and what happened instead. The light bulbs in your lamps are milky, dim with minimal use the last few years, posters of bands you no longer listen to illuminated by them. 

It's not all old and coated in a bittersweet taste only the past can leave in your mouth - some things are new. Like the clothes you are currently laying on, carried to and from your new home back to the childhood one you somehow seek to get away from and stay in until you die. Your bulletin board now littered with reminders for the summer, to do lists, a few Polaroids of the only reason you came back one more year. 

Like the boy can hear you thinking about him, you hear the familiar plink of something hitting your window. Sure enough, as the radio trills out the beginning notes of 'Brandy (You're A Fine Girl'), you loll your head to the side to find him with his arms folded on your windowsill, a perfect smile above the chin resting on them. 

"Well, well, well, would you look at what summer dragged in." Steve's grin only grows wider at the roll of your eyes. He clambers inside the open window, still all too broad of shoulders and clumsy limbs, never quite figuring out the best way to enter despite years of practice. He dusts his hands off on his jeans before they rest on his hips satisfied. 

Some things about Steve Harrington have never changed in the almost 20 years you've known each other. He's still got jeans, a shirt, and shoes that match perfectly - clothes that are in with the latest trends. Everything in the Harrington household wrinkle free of course, and smelling like the same laundry detergent that costs a dollar seventy five more per bottle, but Vivian Harrington insists is the best. He's got the same old watch on his left arm that his grandfather gave him, but the leather band is a little more worn, it fits snuggly on his tanned wrist now. Of course, there's the hair. The only difference with that being the way he learned how to style it, and you suppose it's darkened a bit over the years - caramel and honey to match his eyes. 

Steve squints at the walls of your bedroom in the low lamplight, remembering how he helped you tack up posters and frames years ago. His nose scrunches before his tongue sticks out on the right side as he reads something on your bulletin board. He turns his head to glance over his shoulder at you, large hands dragging over a few of the textbooks you brought home.

"Missed you, city girl." His lips twist up into the familiar smirk under the unfamiliar scruff of what appears to be a mustache he's trying to grow. 

Your favorite pillow squished under your arms as you roll to face him, kicking your legs up. You watch the way his eyebrows furrow but his lips twitch at your quiet, "Missed you too, small town boy." His chest aches a little from the way you say it, like you really did but somehow didn’t at the same time. 

Steve's always been a nickname guy, these one’s his newest favorite all because of an obsession you both have with Journey. He had insisted on changing the lyrics, that it was your song, it made total sense. Although, Buttercup might be his lasting favorite and most used - because of your favorite song and his favorite movie of course. 

He spins, resting himself against your desk, and raises his eyebrows at you as you both sit in not quite an uncomfortable silence. It’s never awkward exactly, this reunion between you and Steve, but there’s always something different when you come home now. 

When you were little, a mere few hours apart had you running towards each other shrieking about who missed who more, Steve lifting your toes off the ground in a hug without a second thought. Now, months apart, and it felt like the air stilled, like there were words hanging there for both of you to say or hear in the silence but neither of you did or could. Despite phone calls to each other as much as possible, the truth was, you both had lives apart from one another now. It always took a second for your gears to line back up, a little oil in the form of jokes and awkward small talk until it was the well running machine your friendship had always been again. 

Steve’s fingers tap at the wood underneath them as he clears his throat, a stray piece of hair falling across his forehead as he ducks his head, feeling silly for the question he asks, “Um, can we…hug?”

“Oh, yeah, sorry.” You scramble off of your bed, tripping a little on the pile of shoes you dumped out last night. 

He catches your fingers and rolls his eyes, “Why are you apologizing?”

Humming as you shrug your shoulders and his arms wrap around you. A hug from Steve was something you wish you could have kept bottled up, pulled out while away at school on the really bad days and held until everything felt right again. They were warm, safe, and reminded you of Steve sharing the last brownie in the tray with you no matter what, of holding hands on a roof while you wished on shooting stars, and they always seemed to turn the world back on its axis when you felt like it was all a little off kilter. Maybe you didn’t have a plan or any idea what the future held, but his arms around you always had a way of reassuring you it’d all be alright and work out in the end. 

Your palms wrap up and underneath, pressed just under his shoulder blades and his go over, enveloping you so your face lies against his chest. It’s easy, like riding a bike, and it’s always the first piece of the machine that starts working again - or maybe the only piece that never breaks. You inhale deeply, relaxing into the other part of Steve you wish you could bottle for rainy days. There’s something about the way he smells, like his toothpaste and expensive things like leather, but it’s more. Maybe it’s rain right before a sunset, or the woods you explored as kids, you’ve never been able to put your finger on it. It’s just Steve, and no other boy has ever come close to smelling as good. 

He clears his throat and you realize you’ve had your nose pressed between his pecs and your body heats up, letting your arms drop. Stepping backwards, you look anywhere but him as your fingers become restless, “Sorry, just missed you, smell good.”

Why the fuck did you just say that? Best friends don’t tell each other they smell good, Y/N.

Steve’s smile is cocky, but you don’t miss the way his cheeks turn a little pink as he quips, “I smell good?”

Rolling your eyes, you turn away from him to your closet, searching, thinking quickly on your feet. “I meant, your, uh, detergent,” looking over your shoulder and smiling, “You’ve got the good stuff over there, was thinking of stealing a bottle in August, Viv won’t mind right?”

Steve laughs a little as he flops onto your bed and your shoulders relax - crisis averted. The invisible line Steve and you had never crossed aside from that one kiss in middle school still drawn in the metaphorical sand. “No, no, I’m sure she’ll blame me or the housekeeper. Actually,” he tosses the pink and green ‘Koosh’ from your nightstand into the air as he continues, “She’ll probably think whoever’s sleeping with my dad took it.”

You spin, wincing and biting your bottom lip, “Shit, I didn’t want you to find out this way…”

“Oh, fuck off!” He tosses the neon toy at your head and you laugh, motioning for him to turn away as you hold up your swimsuit.

He sighs, hands over his eyes as he grumbles something about his dad, faltering when he hears clothes hitting the floor but recovering quickly. You roll your eyes - boys are too easy. 

Your summer uniform of a baggy shirt and jean shorts back over your swimsuit and you stand in front of him. Painted bright red toes tapping his shoe as you smile widely while you tease, “I mean, your dad’s not unattractive-”

Steve’s eyes shoot open as he sits up, voice hoarse, “Stop.”

Shrugging your shoulders and having too much fun at the way Steve’s ears turn red as you continue, “One time, he had on these pair of jeans, which is weird for your dad, you know? And I remember thinking: huh, Mr. Harrington’s butt looks-”

Steve’s hand is over your mouth, body on top of yours as he pulls you onto the bed and rolls. His lips fight a smile, twitching as his eyebrows furrow over his eyes that sparkle. Greens and golds shimmering in the morning sunlight as he leans in closer and whispers, “If you care about me at all you will never, ever finish that sentence.”

Raising your arms under him in surrender, Steve slowly removes his hand from your mouth, eyes watching you carefully. Steve’s warm, his weight against yours comforting and your mouth feels a little dry at the thoughts running through your head. Maybe this was a good time to tell him you weren’t coming back. That it was time to move - on, away - it was time to grow up and you wish he would with you. 

“Ohh, Dingus!” A voice sings from below your window. 

Steve winces as you frown and he gets up, rubbing the back of his neck, mouth opening to answer the question before it even leaves your mouth. 

“Steve, why is Robin here?”

He drops his head in defeat, fingers squeezing his neck as he sighs, “Okay, so I know, it’s your first day back, and we have our deal, but she had too much of this coconut cherry I don’t know what it was last night and well her parents are out of town and…” he keeps going and you sigh. 

You don’t dislike Robin, in fact, you really love her. Sure, you were a little jealous at first that it took Steve all of a month to find a new best friend when you left for early admission that summer. You hate that she was there for him and you weren’t. You hate that they all share a bond you’ll never know because they’ve been here in the hell hole of Hawkins, together, and you haven’t been. But, you’ve learned how to put yourself in a different category - you’re a different kind of friend, and that’s okay. You can share Steve. 

Except on your first day home. 

A rule you both made up in ‘86. The first day back for the summer was yours and Steve’s only. It’s catching up and eating too much junk food, laying by his pool and cooling off with movies before heading back outside to start it all over again. It’s stealing his mom’s good wine and ordering pizza. It was yours and no one else’s. 

At least, that’s how it used to be.

Steve’s finally finished whatever excuse he’s come up with and he stops, shoulders slumping, “You’re mad.”

Forcing a smile, you tuck your hands in your lap and shrug, “No.”

He groans, waggling his finger, and you have to cover your smile and he has to shake his head at the thought of how much he looks like his dad when he does it. “Don’t lie, I know you, Buttercup.”

Standing, you open your door and head down the hallway and shrug your shoulders. “I’ll get over it, of course Robin can hang out with us Steve.”

He starts to follow you out after clicking off your lamp, glancing at your bulletin board again and the picture of him, saying something about making it up to you. Waving him off, halfway down the stairs and looking back up at him as you grin. “Well, why don’t we call it even? You invited Robin to our hangout and I,” you blow out your breath and smile, “Well, Steven, I think your dad has a cute butt.”

Steve gasps but you’re already down the stairs as he chases after you and out the front door shouting something about please for the love of god take it back. Your gleeful, ‘never’ through a peal of laughter and a shouted ‘Hi Robin! Missed you!’ as you race towards his backyard is an image he wishes he could snap a picture of and keep forever. 

The radio still plays, the oldies station drifts out of your window and he glances up at it as he runs by, missing hearing it every day. 

📻 Now playing: Working For The Weekend by Loverboy

Murray stared at you unimpressed, a click of his tongue before the clack of his fingers returning to his keyboard, eyes moving to the screen as he mused, “You’re hungover.”

“I’m not.” A lie, a blatant lie. You didn’t think you’d ever been more hungover in your life to be honest. 

The alarm next to your bed had been slammed off by a large palm this morning, Steve grumbled from his diagonal position across your bed, something about how he couldn’t work, not today. Your bare foot kicked his shirtless and freckled shoulder, somehow your head ending up at the foot of the bed and his on your pillow all night. 

“Steve,” your tongue sat heavy in your mouth, thick and desperate for water. You smacked your lips together and whined, stars still blinking behind your eyes as you kept going, “You have to drive me, I don’t have a car.”

“I hate you,” he moaned, morose, like he was in physical pain - maybe he was. 

“I’m not the one who shoved whiskey down your throat all night!” You kicked at him again and he caught your ankle and hoisted it in the air without opening his eyes. Your yelp interrupted when something below your eyeline squeaked.

Tilting your head back in a grave mistake, you cursed, pushing yourself into an upright position, palms and fingers clinging to your comforter in search of stability since the room was spinning and Steve tugged on your foot with a whine that must have meant to stop moving and shaking the bed. The whiskey pusher in question curled up on your floor under a pile of your clothes instead of a blanket. 

Cups upon cups to your lips that tasted like peaches and cherries, Robin’s amazed and shocked voice still clear as day in your head as she shouted about how you couldn’t even taste the alcohol.

Steve and you had barely made it into the parking lot, clutching your clipboard and tugging on the strap of red spandex that dug into your shoulder. Ignoring the snickers and comments as the two of you practically fell out of the car together, hair unwashed and smelling of alcohol, exactly one minute early. 

Murray doesn’t believe you. You know it, he knows it, and the staff waiting just outside the door knows it. So he simply peers over his wire frames at you, handing over a clipboard and a scoff, “Okay, and I’m the mayor.”

You turn on your heel and his voice calls after your retreating form, just loud enough for everyone to hear, “Puke in the pool and Harrington and you get double shifts for the whole month!”

The too large for you raybans slide over your eyes as your face heats up at the whispers from the staff. Sandals clacking too loudly, swimsuit and athletic shorts too tight, your forehead dotted with sweat and expelling the alcoholic demons from your system before the sun has barely started its climb. This was all wrong and you clear your throat, determined to still turn the day around. 

“Good morning!” your voice squeaks and no one really stops talking. 

Steve’s eyebrows furrow at the crowd, mouth opening but you beat him to it, making sure everyone knows you’re in charge and not him - much to his dismay you’re sure. Repeating yourself a little louder, “I said, good morning!”

Everyone stops then and you go through logistics of lunch breaks and rules that all waterpark attendants need to follow, ending on, “Oh, and absolutely no making out in the supply closet.”

A girl you don’t recognize starts to raise her hand and you tack on, “Or the concession booth,” and it quickly drops. 

Steve starts to laugh, covering it with a cough into his fist as every employee glares at you. Tommy Hagan smirks like it’s a personal challenge, Andy rolls his eyes, Heidi blows a bright pink bubble of her gum and snaps it loudly as Carol scoffs. Rolling your shoulders back and letting the whispers of ‘pathetic’ and ‘jealous’ from the girls who peek at Steve bounce off of you. All another reason you didn’t want to come home again, the looming sign of ‘jealous best friend’ or ‘hey look at me I’m the third wheel!’ always above your head. 

“Alright! Assignments!”

Sheet flipping on the clipboard, you rattle off names and positions, staff talking amongst themselves until you tell them where to go, leaving in pairs. Andy argues with you about how he wanted the concession booth and your reply of that’s too damn bad earns a whistle from Carol and a wink from Tommy, mumbling something about ‘feisty’ as the two boys slink off to the obstacle course part of the park.

“Sinclair!” you shout and both teens step forward, smiling at you, “Both of you on slides.”

Their smiles drop immediately and Steve twists his lips up and you know he’s preparing to argue with you, to let you know that this pairing probably wasn’t a good idea from the way the two teen siblings glared at each other with disgust. 

“I wouldn’t-” Steve began and you interrupted.

“Harrington, I got it.”

“Right.”

Everyone left in the small circle lets out quiet oo’s, like he had just been told to go to the principal’s office. Rolling your eyes, you suppress your groan because of course he’s next on the list. 

“Harrington!”

His eyes sparkle and he stands up straighter, “Yeah, boss?”

Everyone’s lips twist and you recall your note he stared a little too long at on your bulletin board vowing to make him call you just that. 

Keeping your voice cool, you reply, “Lessons. Byers and-”

“I’m sorry, what?” Steve’s voice interrupts you again and you push his glasses into your hair, raising your eyebrows at him. 

“What now, Harrington?”

Steve steps forward, voice dropping as his eyebrows pinch together, “You’re not seriously putting me with kids all day long? Lessons? As in swimming lessons?”

Your clipboard drops to your side, hip cocking as your chin rises in a challenge, “As a matter of fact I am, do you have a problem with it?”

Steve narrows his eyes, raising his brows and hands, surrendering as he backs away, “No problem here ma’am.”

Steve heads off towards the pool, turning and miming how you were going to pay, finger pointing and then drawing a line over his throat as he shakes his head with a smile so you know he’d get over it eventually. You slide his sunglasses back over your eyes, newfound energy buzzing through you as you smile and keep going, “Right, where was I…Byers…”

Your body collapses onto the bench of one of the picnic tables. The sun is just breaking past its highest point, a layer of sweat glistens on your skin, your sandals new and unbroken and you kick them off, your arches relaxing into the hot cement. So far you’ve only had to put out small fires - a first aid kit delivered to the lazy river where a kid tried to belly flop into a tube and missed; an unfortunate cleaning incident in the kiddie pool that Steve was gonna make you pay for no doubt; an actual fire in the concession booth where Argyle tried a new snack invention out against Jonathan’s warning, and separating Lucas and Erica after she shoved him down one of the water slides headfirst. You hate that Steve was right. 

His voice pulls your attention, and you glance over at the deep end of the pool where he stands. He swipes water from his eyes and his teeth are almost as bright as the turquoise water reflecting the sun that ripples around his tanned and toned waist. He stares up at the six year old with yellow floaties wrapped around her arms where she fidgets near the edge of the pool. 

“Alright Bailey, so when I say three, you’re gonna jump.”

“Kay,” she shivers, unconvinced, pink ruffles on her swimsuit blowing in the breeze as she frowns at him. 

A line of a few more kids behind her wait their turn and Steve yells ‘three’ excitedly, holding his arms out. 

Bailey doesn’t move a muscle. 

A boy behind her groans, “Mr. Steve, she's not going to do it, she's too scared!”

Steve points at him, “Hey, I seem to remember someone being afraid of me taking my hand off of them to float by themselves Jack.” Steve wades over to the edge and smiles, “Bailey, you can wait to jump, but I bet you’re gonna have a blast once you do. I promise I won’t let anything bad happen to you.”

She pouts, eyes filling with tears and he reaches up and squeezes her hand, “Hey don’t worry, we have all summer. Watch some of the other kids try it, okay?”

Bailey nods and moves out of line as a flash of red fills your vision.

Murray towers above you, arm extended and dangling a can of coke that drips with condensation in front of your face. “I’m impressed, kid. You run a smooth ship,” he gestures with the can towards you, “For your hangover.”

Your fingers curl around the Coke, mouth parting to argue and he holds up his hand, “Spare me. If not for that then to soothe the heated lust you have for the Harrington boy.”

He starts to walk away, your nose wrinkling at his choice of words before you realize what they actually imply, shouting, “I don’t-”

“You do!” Murray’s arm waves, interrupting you as he disappears back towards the front offices.

“You don’t what?” a familiar voice says as it plops into the seat next to you. Your frown replaced by a wide smile. 

Eddie Munson sits with his head back, lips pulled over his teeth in a way that shows off his dimples, big brown eyes crinkling in the corners. He’s somehow still in jeans despite the heat, legs spread wide as he leans against the wood tabletop behind him. Pale arms revealing his tattoos in all their glory thanks to the roughly cut band tee draped across his form. He places a cigarette between his lips, lighter raised and you pluck it free, ignoring his scoff of protest. 

“You can’t smoke here!” Snagging the pack he had thrown onto the table and holding it away from him, “Besides, I thought you said you were quitting?”

He groans, “That was two years ago and before I started working with that prissy-”

“You’re in fucking love with her, admit it,” you roll your eyes, pushing Steve’s sunglasses onto your head as you give him a knowing look.

“I hate her,” he waves a hand, dismissive as his cheeks turn pink and he looks around the park.  

Your thumb swipes over the top of your Coke, wiping the condensation with a loud laugh, ���Okay, I don’t believe that for one second, Eddie. I don’t understand why you can’t just-”

“Tell her how I feel? Well, sweetheart, I could ask you the same thing about a certain next door loverboy, couldn’t I?”

Your mouth clamps shut and he leans forward, face close to yours, “Not so easy being on the other side is it?”

A brown sack falls in front of the two of you, both of you looking up to see Robin disappearing towards Steve with a wave of her hand. Steve smiles at the two of you, water clinging to his body, chest hair curling and sticking to his skin, red swim trunks that contrast his bronzed skin - pulling on and highlighting certain things that make you have to look away.

Steve pushes a hand through his hair as he watches Eddie lean closer to you, a smile on both of your lips before yours falls. 

“For your drool,” Robin quips as a white and blue striped towel is shoved in his face. 

“M’not drooling,” Steve mumbles under his breath, pushing his face into the towel and trying to even his breathing. 

“I don’t understand you two.” She shakes her head, stealing a chip out of his lunch bag that he yanks from her with a pinched expression taking over his features. 

“There’s nothing to understand because-”

“She’s not staying in Hawkins and I am, I’ll only hold her back, Robs.” Robin finishes with him. 

He glares at her, unamused and she steals the bag of chips again, walking back out of the park, mumbling under her breath, “This is going to a long fucking summer.” She calls back over her shoulder, “Eddie! Break’s over!”

Eddie flips the sunglasses down on your eyes and nose as he stands, knocking Steve’s temple lightly with his knuckles as he passes. Steve and you watch your friends leave the park, and he sits in front of you, water dripping onto your feet as he steals your Pringles and you smile at each other. 

Blowing your breath out of your nose, you take a big bite of your sandwich. Steve shoves a handful in his mouth and speaks around the chips, “What’dhedotostopsmiling?”

PB and J thick in your mouth, you shove it into your cheek as you ask, “Wha?”

Steve shrugs, chewing and rolling his eyes as he gestures to his mouth too full to speak and you both start laughing around your bites of food, leaning into one another.  

Both of you relax, swallowing and breathing normally again. He clears his throat, taking a sip of your coke before he taps the table, “I said, what’d he do to make you stop smiling?”

“Oh,” your fingers pick at the crust on your sandwich as your brows furrow, “Uh, we were just talking about that girl he works with is all.”

Steve hums, “So…you’re jealous?”

“What?” you laugh around a sip of Coke, wiping at your lips, “Of her? No.”

Steve snaps a carrot between his teeth before frowning at it and grabbing another Pringle from your bag. He fiddles with the carrot as he replies, “She’s pretty,” he speaks around the singular chip easily this time, “We went on a date a few weeks ago.”

Your eyes roll as you mumble around the sweet bread that smells like honey, “Of course you did.”

Steve straightens, tone annoyed, “What’s that supposed to mean?”

Shoulders rolling as you mirror his posture, “Just…you go on a lot of dates it seems s’all.”

It’s quiet for a bit before he nods once, fiddling with the paper bag, “It’s not like it was serious you know, just like, fun, you do remember how to do that right?”

Your eyes roll as he spins a cherry tomato and asks, “Have you even gone on any dates lately? Feel like you never really talk to me about it anymore.”

“Oh,” you swallow a grape and shrug, splashes in the pool louder, the sun above you hotter as you try to focus on anything other than him, “Um, not really, nobody really asks me?”

Steve scoffs, leveling you with a disbelieving look, “Honey, now I know that’s not true.”

“Yes it is!” you protest.

“Luke Bishop asked you out for New Year’s and you said-”

“Well, that’s different. That’s guys in Hawkins, I don’t want some small town…” your voice trails off as he purses his lips, realizing what you’re saying.  

Steve’s hot, he’s hungover, and he’s hurt and that’s the only reason he says, “Well, maybe you’ve got a stick up your ass because people in the city don’t know how to have a good time. Maybe you should try out the small town thing for the summer, have some fun - you used to like it.”

Your mouth drops open, “Um, first of all, you’re kind of being an ass. Second, are you seriously telling me I should hook up with guys all summer?”

“Yeah, guys. Multiple. All summer long. Go nuts.” He waves his hand nonchalantly. 

“Fine, maybe I will.” 

“Great, I hope you do.” He smiles, tight lipped and pulls the sunglasses off of your face and pushes them onto his, throwing a grape in his mouth. 

Steve doesn’t say anything more and neither do you. Does he really not see how you feel? Is that really what he wants? To see you with other people, to let you move away while he stays in the same town dating the same people, never growing, never changing, never leaving? 

Maybe it’s just those gears sticking, they need more oil, they need more time. 

He starts to stand and you grab his wrist, hating how your stomach feels and the look on his face, “Hey, can you take me to Rick’s Motors tonight? I’ll buy you a milkshake?” You bat your eyes and try to smile, making your tone light again. 

He stands, “Can’t, sorry, I have a date. I gotta go. The twelve year olds will start drowning each other by the diving boards if I don’t get over there.”

You watch the girls of the park, high schoolers, staff, and even the moms follow his retreating form like lions stalking their prey. His words ringing in your ears as a green monster battles with the whiskey in your stomach for the thing that’s making you more nauseous. 

Maybe Steve is right, and if he insists on dating the entire population of Hawkins instead of you, perhaps you could have some fun with someone else for the summer. 

📻 Now Playing: Don’t Stop Believin’ by Journey 

Hoisting yourself up onto the windowsill, you hold your breath when you hear voices coming from his bedroom. 

Wait, not voices, singing, and a…sigh? Oh fuck, is that moan? Oh god, you are seriously not about to see your best friend having sex! You are seriously not hearing your best friend have sex! If this is karmic irony for telling him his dad’s butt is cute you take it back. 

Since Monday, Steve had been gone every night on different dates, like he had something to prove. Like he needed to fill his time with any person that wasn’t you.  

You knew it was silly, a summer Friday night, of course he had a date. He saw how you shrugged and said it’s fine at work though, squeezing your fingers before walking away. The machine was not a well-oiled one again yet, and you were determined to get it back on the right track. 

You had told Rick to fuck right off when he claimed he had no recollection of your deal made over winter break. Before he was hastily calling you sweet thing when you shoved the open envelope that was bursting with cash back into your bag and sighed, claiming to find someone else who’d want the money instead of him. 

A blanket on your front lawn as your parents cooked and relaxed inside, your brand new baby sitting in the driveway. As the sun turned from gold to orange and it dipped behind the houses though, you gave up waiting to show it off for Steve. 

The sky turned blush, then lilac, then the same color of your new car. As the moon started to outshine the fading sun, his maroon BMW finally pulled into his driveway and you grabbed your chucks by the laces and climbed out your window as quietly as you could. 

You had been sure you watched Steve walk into his house alone, but the sound of the groan mixed with Tears For Fears playing quietly made you doubt yourself completely. Your foot slides on a shingle, a quiet ‘fuck’ falls from your lips and a louder ‘Hello?’ comes from inside. 

Your shoulders hunch, your eyes squeeze tight as you cry out from your precarious position, “Pay no attention to the man behind the curtain! I’m leaving, I-”

“What the hell are you doing?” His voice hisses, closer, and you peek one eye open. 

Steve’s eyebrows are furrowed together as he sees you balancing like you’re on a surfboard and not on the roof of his garage with one eye open. He’s half leaning out his window - shirtless, black boxers slung low on his hips, cheeks rosy and hair ruffled, oh god you totally interrupted sex. 

You look down at the roof, body hot as you try to scoot further away, “I- I wanted to hang out, but you’re busy, and-”

“I’m not busy.”

Your head whips up, taking in his appearance again and you tilt your head to the side, “You’re not?”

His expression turns confused, “What, no,” extending his hand out towards you, “Will you please come over to the window, I don’t trust your balance right now.”

You start to crawl towards him, thoughts running a mile a minute as your fingers lace with his and he pulls you through the window, grumbling, “You could have used the front door.”

“You never use the front door,” you stick out your tongue as your hands drop, fingers untangling themselves and he spins, heading to his closet. 

Steve’s sheets are rumpled, the radio playing quietly and his clothes leave a trail from the door to his bed. When you see the bottle of lube hastily shoved under the shirt by the nightstand you spin on him, “You weren’t busy?”

“Do I look like I was busy?” His head pops out of a yellow sweatshirt. 

He yanks on jeans, bouncing a little as he pulls them up his hips, eyebrows raised in your direction. You pretend to be interested in his dresser as you shrug. “Maybe just your hand.”

You whip your head over to look at him dramatically, his fingers stop on his zipper as his head shoots up, cheeks flushing darker and you gasp. “Oh my god, you were masturbating with your window open. Steve Harrington you dirty, dirty-”

His hand is over your mouth, his eyes are closed and his shoulders slump, “Please, please can we never speak of this again?”

You tap on his fingers and he peeks his eyes open to find you raising two fingers in a Scout’s honor, eyes sparkling above his hand as he lets you go. Your other fingers twisted behind your back to cover your tracks for lying because you absolutely plan on bringing it up again. 

It’s quiet, his stereo plays and he buttons his jeans, your bodies too close together. That stilled air is back again and you need to do something to break it so you whisper, “Do you want me to let you finish or are you good to go?”

He groans, hands sliding down his cheeks as he spins and leaves his room. Your feet are loud as you chase after him, skipping down the stairs, both of you jumping over the last two.  

“So it was a bad date, I take it? No, uh, happy ending?”

“I’m not hearing this, I’m not listening, this isn’t happening…” he sings to himself under his breath, heading out his front door. He stops in front of his car when you start to head back towards your house, “Where are you going?”

Spinning, you hold up your new set of keys and smile, “Oh, I thought I’d drive.”

Steve’s smile is brighter than the moon, but it does not last long when you barely make it to the woods that lead to Lover’s Lake and you quietly mumble something about the AC not working. 

“I hate to break it to you, Buttercup, but Rick sold you a fucking lemon,” Steve’s tone is clipped, annoyed you had gone car shopping without him and bought something because it was cute and your dream car - safety and properly functioning be damned. 

You hoist the Quick Mart bag into the air and crawl onto the hood, patting the spot next to you. Waiting until he sighs, scooting up the pale blue paint of the VW Bug, pretending to not be curious about what you have in the bag. 

“Well, if you keep talking about my baby like that I’m not gonna show you what Rick gave me for the AC not working…” 

“Better have been the keys to the lot cause the piece of shit he so-”

You pull a joint from your bra and he stops, glancing down into the open bag on your lap to see chocolate milk and gummy worms and he smiles, “Oh, fuck yeah!”

He reaches for the joint and you hold it above your head, eyes sparkling, palm on his chest. “Take it back.”

He drops his head back, looking up at the stars that slowly dot the sky, becoming brighter. He mumbles up to the heavens, “Your baby is not a lemon.”

“Thank you.” Ripping the bag of gummy worms open as he lights the joint. 

The gears are oiled, the smoke in your lungs and the looser inhibitions kick start the machine and soon you’re shooting chocolate milk out of your nose from laughing too hard and ripping gummy worms in half for wishes. 

Your head rolls, the cool blue metal beneath your cheek as you take in your best friend’s profile. His cheeks are hollowed as he inhales, dark scruff lining his jaw that’s more angular than it used to be, the slope of his nose fitting his face better. The curve of his fingers on hands that are a size that fits his body now, if not still big. Steve turned into a man somehow in the last few years, but as he passes the joint to you while ripping a gummy worm between his teeth, you see why it’s hard for him to move on, the boy you know from your childhood still there at his core. 

“Hey, Steve?” you whisper into the evening air, cicadas buzzing around you loudly, your summer mixtape playing out of your car’s open windows. Passing the burning paper back to him again.

“Yeah?” 

“So you masturbate fully naked, huh?”

He coughs around his inhale, head smacking the hood and you cackle, both of your sounds echoing across the lake. 

Steve groans, snuffing out the end of your fun as he sits up, “Well, that settles it. You’re definitely too high.”

You sit up as well, arms wrapping around his, “Oh, come on, Steve, Steven, Stevie,” he looks down his nose at you unamused as you tug on his bicep, “I’m your best friend, am I not?”

He sighs through his nose, thick fingers fiddling with the chocolate milk cap, “Yeah, of course.”

“So, as your best friend, I think I have a right to know.”

“No, you don’t. That’s not how this works.”

“Who says?”

“I say.” Steve flicks your temple and you blow out a raspberry. 

You lay back against the hood and stare up at the stars, finding The Big Dipper first before you search for answers in a greater world than you’ll ever know. 

Steve stares out at the lake, his knees drawn up and arms hanging over them. You wonder if he’s thinking the same things as you. That it’s all too big and there are too many unanswered questions. Maybe he needs a distraction, the weight to be lifted just like you do, just for one more summer. So you smile and push it further, the weed making you a little more bold. 

“I’m usually a shirt and panties gal myself.”

Steve’s breathing stops and you smirk, head tilted back as he lets out a breath that sounds shaky before looking back at you. 

You grin, hands resting on your stomach, as the heel of your converse drags on the hood, pulling your knees up. “Naked is a bold choice, why-”

He falls back against the hood again, hand grabbing yours and squeezing, “No more masturbation talk, I beg of you. I’d rather talk about my dad’s ass at this point.”

You lace your fingers through his and he rolls his eyes at your smile, both of you turning your attention back to the inky sky. 

It could be seconds, minutes, or hours that you sit there in silence, but it’s not the awkward, stilled kind anymore, it’s the kind you yearn for with other people. The kind of silence that’s simple and more powerful with the things unsaid than spoken. Your chests move in time together, slow breaths in and out, Steve’s thumb brushes against your skin in a way that has the high making every nerve in your body hone in on it. Steve starts singing along quietly to ‘Don’t Stop Believin’’. 

“What should I name her?” You pat the car with your other hand. 

“Stevie?” He smirks. 

“Ella? Doris?” 

It’s quiet for a second and then Steve turns his whole body, resting on his side, “How about just ‘Baby’?”

You mirror his position, smiling at the Dirty Dancing reference and agreeing, “It’s perfect.”

“For a smile they can share the night, it goes on and on and on and onnn…”

Steve clears his throat and traces his fingers along the metal beneath him absentmindedly, “I know why you like that movie so much.”

You roll to your back again, avoiding his gaze, “Because Patrick Swazye is a total hottie, of course.”

He hums, “Mmm, well, sure, but it’s cause of the actual dirty dancing in the one scene.”

Your body heats up, hands and legs fidgeting and he leans over you, finger in your face, smug and gloating, “Aha!”

Swatting his finger away with a groan, “Shut up!”

“Oh, so you can bug me about masturbating, but I can’t tease you for liking a little sexy dancing in a movie? What’s that about honey, huh?” His fingers are on your waist, jabbing playfully and you wheeze for air, laughing. 

“I give, I give, I surrender!” Swatting at his shoulders until his fingers stop. 

You’re both breathless, Steve’s eyes in front of yours, blocking out all of the stars - there’s only him. His lips part, tongue licking over his top one as he glances down at yours, bodies warm against one another. 

He whispers your name and you think that maybe something bigger is going to happen. Maybe all of those stars that shot across the sky with a promise of wishes fulfilled are finally rewarding you. 

“Well what do we have here?”

Andy’s voice rings through the night and Steve and you scoot apart from each other, glancing up to see half of Newbys staff and more holding cases of various booze and boom boxes as they walk past you and down to the shore. 

“Hi, Steve,” a tall blonde wiggles her fingers at him as she passes and you hop off the hood. 

Robin and Eddie change the pitch of their voices as they steal both the candy and milk when they run by. Waggling their fingers at him mocking, “Hiii, Steeevvee.” 

Steve throws a pinecone at Eddie’s head with impressive aim in the dark and smirks when he yelps. 

Tommy passes by with Carol and he looks you up and down in a way that makes you feel slimy, “Is Princeton Princess gonna come remind everyone why even the wannabe King of Hawkins couldn’t get her?” He pouts, “Or is she still pretending she’s too good for all of us?”

“Fuck off, Hagan!” Steve and you moan while flipping him off in sync. 

The bodies of your peers all disappear, the sounds of guitars and bass are louder than the ones coming out of your car, and the ember’s of a bonfire match the woosh you hear as flames catch and logs are lit. 

The first summer bonfire.

“Who calls pong first?” a voice shouts. 

Steve sticks his tongue in his cheek as he looks at you, raising his eyebrows. A silent conversation of how you could go back home, or you could have some fun and forget that you have to work tomorrow. 

You race each other to the sandy beach and at some point his hand slips into yours and pulls you along faster as he screams, “We’re first! Move, Munson!”

📻 Now Playing: Bohemian Rhapsody by Queen

“Robin, please I’m begging you, literally anything else.”

She pauses from where she restocks the cassette shipment, eyes narrowing at the wall as she tilts her head, seeming to think over your request before looking at you seriously and tapping your nose. “No.”

You groan in frustration and grab the Red Vines off the counter and stalk towards the front door, her shout calling behind you, “Hey!”

“Sorry! Red Vines are for birthday girls who are willing to negotiate!”

Her co-worker’s laugh leaves the store with you while the bell chimes overhead as the door slams shut. The tough licorice candy is no match for your teeth as you growl into your bite and Steve hands over the cherry slurpee left over from the movie with raised eyebrows. 

“She didn’t go for it, huh?”

You kick a rock down the sidewalk before sitting on the curb with a huff. 

“You know, I think it’s gonna be a lot of fun…” he starts again.  

Your glare is white heat down his spine as you rip into another Red Vine. 

“Camping, Steve. Camping! It’s going to be like 80 out and there’s bugs and rocks and, and trees, and-”

He laughs, hands covering his face, “Oh my god, it’s barely outside of Hawkins and what happened to the girl who used to go worm hunting with me? The city has changed you, Buttercup.”

The slurpee sucks through the straw loudly, gaps in the red sugary drink making you hollow your cheeks more and Steve feels his own cheeks and ears turning the same color as his tongue. He pulls it away from you, “Alright, easy tiger, I think he’s had enough.”

Your forehead falls against his bicep with a moan. Steve wraps his arm around your waist and squeezes. “I promise, you’re gonna have a great time, you’re going to be begging to go on more trips just like it.”

That’s how you found yourself in the middle of an Indiana State Park on the last weekend in June - glaring at your best friend. 

Steve’s lip is between his teeth, baseball hat turned around as his fingers rub his temple and he looks down at the rough sketch of the map he had sworn was an exact copy of the one at the trailhead. 

And maybe it had been, four hours ago. Before you both sweat through your clothes, before his canteen leaked and made the sharpie and lined paper look like a monster.  

“We’re lost?” You venture, palm swatting at things that fly at your sweat soaked neck for the fifth time in less minutes. 

“No, no, not lost, we’re-” Steve squints as he looks at the two wood arrows pointing in opposite directions and back down to the soggy paper. 

Sitting on a boulder, another five minutes pass before Steve finally drops the useless map with a curse and looks at you apologetically, “Yeah, we’re lost.”

Your head falls into your hands, fingers ripping at your hair before he snaps his fingers. “Oh! The walkies, I’ll try to explain where we are and…” 

You hop up, scrambling pebbles and pinecones under your feet as adrenaline fills your veins for the first time in hours at the hope of getting back to the campsite. It wasn’t your bed, but it’s something. 

Steve turns the dial of the walkie and you wait for static, but nothing leaves the tiny speaker. He clicks it again and then shakes it violently in his hand, “You. Stupid. Piece. Of. Shit!”

“Steven,” your head looks up at the sky, a deep breath through your nose, “Are there batteries in that thing?”

It’s far too quiet and Steve fears for his life tonight. Not because you’re lost in the middle of the woods, but from the look you’re giving him. 

Your hands shove at his chest once, “Steve! I listened to you swear to Henderson that thing had fucking batteries in it-”

“I thought there were! He’s always getting on me about them, because I did it to him one time, the little twerp is such a-”

Shoving at his chest harder, you scream at him, “We’re gonna die in the fucking woods because you have a tough guy complex and have to make sure everyone knows you’re cooler than a seventeen year old and-” you break off into a sob and shove him harder than the first two times and he stumbles backwards a little. 

“Hey!” His fingers wrap around your wrists and your forehead falls into his chest and you start crying. Steve’s voice softens, “Hey, come on, stop, we’re gonna be fine. We’re like ten? Yeah ten miles away from camp. If we start back the way we came…we’ll…we’re gonna be fine.”

“Sorry,” you sniffle and wipe your nose into his shirt. 

His palms soothe up your spine and when you tilt your chin on his chest to peer up at him, he cradles your face. The pads of Steve’s thumbs are rough, but gentle in their movement as he swipes at your cheeks with a smile, “Nothing to be sorry for.” He leans down and kisses your forehead. 

Chapped lips that are still warm and soft against your skin. Steve inhales the smell of your shampoo, the salt on your skin as he presses a second and longer kiss to your hairline. Your eyes flutter closed and your fingers tangle in the hem of his shirt, getting closer to him.  

Both of you realizing what you just did at about the same time, you pull away and clear your throats, arms dropping to your sides. 

It’s been quiet for over an hour according to his watch, and the sun is causing the pine’s shadows to slant longer across the dirt trail. Broken up by golden light that sparkles and highlights moss and leaves that hold the morning’s dew still. You have to admit it’s pretty. It had been all day. And really, you had been having a pretty good time like Steve said you would, as much as you hated to admit he was right. 

Steve had made a birthday weekend mix, the few hours driving out of Hawkins town limit filled with wind whipping your hair and singing along loudly as the sky turned from navy to lavender to rose and gold. A lull of speaking and the dawn sun making you all lazy and sleepy until Bohemian Rhapsody had come on. You had leaned forward in between the seats, squealing and asking for it to be turned up. Steve, Robin, Eddie and you taking turns belting out specific parts down to the guitar solo. All of you screaming at the top of your lungs, “So you think you can stone me and spit in my eye?” Bouncing with energy as you arrived at the State Park, everyone hopping out and setting up their tents. 

And the campsite was pretty, you missed it. Close to the lake that Steve promised would have a killer sunset over it tonight, you squinted up at the trees ahead of you, pretty sure you’d never make it back in time for it. Despite thinking you had all day for this specific hike, the sun rose and started to set faster than your legs could carry either of you. And that was before you were lost. 

📻 Now Playing: I’m On Fire by Bruce Springsteen

You need a distraction, and sure enough, your best friend always seems to know what you need before you do. 

“Do you remember,” Steve starts, eyes on the trail ahead of you, thumbs looped into the backpack straps over his shoulders, “When we met?”

Your smile cracks the dirt and sweat that clings to your face, before you laugh, “Yeah, I shoved Tommy’s face in the sand on the playground when he told me that girl’s couldn’t like dinosaurs and you tattled on me.” Your hip bumps his.

Steve looks over at you, “I stand by that, you were a menace on the blacktop, specifically tetherball when we got to middle school, but, no,” he shakes his head, “That’s not the first time we met.”

“It’s not?” You’re lost in recalling memories, sifting through smiles and laughs and even tears, too caught up in it all to see how Steve watches you out of the corner of his eye. How his gaze moves over your face and wishes he had an ounce of the drive and focus you do. 

“Give up?” He whispers and you look over at him and he smiles, “It was when you moved in. You were outside with chalk and asked me if I wanted to draw with you?”

“Oh yeah,” you smile down at your shoes but then look up at him, “Why are you bringing this up now?”

Steve looks at you seriously, “I think the shit we scribbled on your driveway twenty years ago was museum quality compared to the map I barely wrote down before leaving on this hike - before the water ruined it. We were doomed from the start.”

You laugh, shoving his shoulder, “I’m never going camping or hiking with you again!” 

Your laughter trails off as you keep walking, Steve rubs at his jaw and you wonder if he’s up for actual reminiscing as you hedge, “Remember the first party we went to?”

Steve swallows, humming a little, “Mhm.”

Your voice is quiet, but you laugh, “I remember I came over to your house because Jackie told Shelby that Tommy told Carol that a boy liked me and wanted to kiss me at the party.”

Steve rubs at his neck nodding, “Right, yeah, I remember…”

Your eyes are glued to your sneakers now, watching the pine needles scatter with each drag of your heel, “And I asked you if you would kiss me, so I knew how to do it.”

“Yeah, listen, Y/N,” Steve starts. Your head whips over to him at the use of your actual name, no longer looking at the path. He sees it all happening before it does, eyes widening as your foot hits the edge of the path and holds out his hand and grabs yours, “Wait, watch ou-!”

You’re all limbs as you slide and roll down the side of the hill, Steve cursing and your fingers squeeze his palm tightly. Something burns, something stings, something hurts and it feels like days that you’re moving and falling until you’re not. Your breath is heavy, eyelids fluttering as his hand slips from yours. 

“Oh, fuck,” Steve’s breath is knocked from his lungs. His palm presses into black earth and he looks up, laughing when he sees the yellow tent and Robin holding the walkie in her hand in the distance. Of course they were barely away from camp. They’d probably been walking in circles for all he knew. 

Robin’s hand over her eyes as she squints, “Steve?”

Steve laughs, holding his side, “Oh, Buttercup, you beautiful, wonderful, clumsy person. I don’t know how you just managed to…”

He falters when he looks around and doesn’t see you. Standing, as he calls out “Y/N?”

Steve hears your whimper and his heart stops when he sees your crumpled body, crimson staining your temple and soaking your pant leg. He scrambles, tripping over his sneakers, “Y/N! Robin, get the first aid kit!”

His fingers shake, unsure of where he should touch or grab or hold, “Hey, hey, Y/N, can you open your eyes, are you okay, can you talk, Y/N, babe, please say something.” 

A cough gets stuck in your throat and you moan at the pounding in your head, eyelids fluttering, “Babe’s a new one.”

Steve laughs through a sob and then taps at your cheeks when your eyes start to close again, “Hey, no, no, no, you gotta stay awake, I’m so sorry, no, honey, stay awake…”

Thank you for reading and I appreciate any love left - I hope you can share my writing and get it circulated. As a reminder, there is no tag list for this fic / series. 💛

[ikolaiigh]

My Love Will Never Die

𝑻𝑾/𝑾𝑨𝑹𝑵𝑰𝑵𝑮𝑺..Accidental S3lf-harm, near drowning, Sexual Content, stalking, Possessive behavior, Murder, Obsessive behavior, unhealthy behavior, angst with a happy ending, violence, hallucinations, heavy disassociation, self-loathing thoughts, Emotional/Psychological Abuse (not by Ariel btw), s*icidal thoughts, Mental Breakdown, Every chapter when release will have its warning.

𝑷𝑨𝑰𝑹𝑰𝑵𝑮𝑺: Yandere!Ariel x Queen!Reader

𝑺𝑼𝑴𝑴𝑨𝑹𝒀..She saved you, cradled you in her arms, and her soothing voice resonates within you like a haunting melody. When you both reunited again on the shoreline, her presence now consumes your every thought and feeling. Her presence feels essential to your survival, and you're determined to live on, no matter the circumstances...what she had done with you?

𝘈/𝘕: HI HI YET AGAIN!! :))) So uh this is extremely self-indulgent ngl, the lack of Yandere!Ariel is like...illegal and yes this is another series since Under the Sea is almost finished (I will post it dw) so I decided to do this! And in this AU instead of Eric being the prince of the kingdom, it will be the Reader! Btw Ariel here is not specified, so you can interpret her from the 1989 version or the live action! So..I hope you guys enjoy!

-Also! Ariel in this AU is heavily based by this post here! Again her race isn't specified! Neither is the Reader's :) Ariel is the acting "Queen" of Atlantica! both reader and Ariel are in their mid 20's!

𝑷𝑳𝑨𝒀𝑳𝑰𝑺𝑻... Ariel Carinae

"𝐒𝐡𝐞 𝐥𝐚𝐮𝐠𝐡𝐞𝐝 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐝𝐚𝐧𝐜𝐞𝐝 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐮𝐠𝐡𝐭 𝐨𝐟 𝐝𝐞𝐚𝐭𝐡 𝐢𝐧 𝐡𝐞𝐫 𝐡𝐞𝐚𝐫𝐭." -𝐇𝐚𝐧𝐬 𝐂𝐡𝐫𝐢𝐬𝐭𝐢𝐚𝐧 𝐀𝐧𝐝𝐞𝐫𝐬𝐞𝐧

When a ruler dies, the ones in line for the throne make one last attempt to get to it first. A rather chaotic few days filled with desperation, especially for those involved.

As the sun began to set, casting a warm glow over the kingdom, you found yourself seeking solace in the confines of your bedroom facing the dressing table's mirror. The weight of the impending crown bore heavily on your mind, its significance not lost on you. In just a few hours, you would officially become queen, but with the throne came the burden of making crucial decisions for the kingdom. The once comforting opulence of the room now felt suffocating and distant, a reminder of the isolation that accompanied the crown.

Sinking into a plush chair at the dressing table, your thoughts drifted back to the vivid memories of Ariel – the love that had blossomed between you, and the enchanting melody that had captured your heart. You couldn't help but recall the day she had saved you, the tender touch of her hand as she sang to you, the way she had held you close in her arms. Those memories now intertwined with the weight of your responsibilities, a bittersweet reminder of the love you had to set aside for the sake of the kingdom.

The question lingered in your mind, gnawing at your heart – was this the price of wearing the crown? Were you now destined to sacrifice your own happiness for the sake of a kingdom that demanded everything, even your own heart? The magnitude of the decision weighed heavily on your shoulders, casting shadows over the once-gleaming path you were meant to tread.

Lost in your inner turmoil, you caught a glimpse of your reflection in the grand mirror across the room. The image of the new queen stared back at you, her eyes revealing vulnerability masked by a composed facade. You wondered if anyone could see the turmoil brewing within, the fear of making the wrong choices, and the longing for a simpler life.

With a heavy sigh, you closed your eyes, leaning against the dressing table seeking a moment of peace. When you opened your eyes again and glanced at the mirror, an unexpected sight greeted you – the reflection of Ariel, her image appearing as if she were gently caressing your shoulders and whispering in your ear. Startled, you quickly whipped your head around to see if anyone was with you in the room, but the space remained empty. Rubbing your eyes in disbelief, you couldn't help but chuckle slightly at the surreal experience. Your mind wanders back to Ariel once again.

You would never forget the fervent kisses, scattered like a trail of fire across your body, etched indelibly into your mind. Ariel's tender embrace, as she passionately expressed her love in ways no one else ever had, remained vivid. Her hands enveloped you with tenderness and curiosity, each movement a promise, while the dance of her tongue, an intoxicating symphony of desire, enveloped you in a sensation that felt as if her longing had consumed your very being, propelling you to uncharted heights, a realm of ecstasy before she gently guided you into the cool embrace of the waters. There, her muscular form, usually untouched by warmth, melded with yours, creating a cocoon of closeness that spoke that she doesn't want to ever let you go.

Every morning, as you reluctantly left Ariel's warmth with the rising sun, her tender touches lingered on your body like an ethereal caress. The memory of her feverish kisses, especially the ones trailing across your neck, sent shivers down your spine even in her absence. But it was her melodious chanting in the sea that beckoned you, a siren's call gently urging you to come back to her embrace. As much as you longed to answer that call, you knew you couldn't succumb to its temptation.

The weight of the crown on your head was heavy, Your mother, the queen, had prepared you for the royal role you were destined to fulfill. Yet, the training seemed lacking when it came to matters of the heart. Complications arose as the people of the kingdom impatiently clamored for your marriage, whispering among themselves, eagerly awaiting the day when their future queen would wed, the people's expectations clawing at your back.

You will learn to love him. You remembered Lashana's soft voice as she held you in her warm embrace as you wailed into her chest, soothing your pain with her reassuring voice. The pressure from courtiers and advisors was suffocating, as they pushed you towards a union with the prince of Glowerhaven, but deep down, you knew your heart belonged to Ariel, and no amount of forced affection could change that truth.

Under the shroud of nightfall, you found yourself standing at the water's edge, the waves gently lapping at your feet. The kingdom had settled down for the night, its citizens and tourists all asleep. With a wistful gaze, you stared out at the vast expanse of water that separated you from Ariel's world. The rhythmic sound of the waves seemed to echo her enchanting songs, a constant reminder of the love you could only embrace in secrecy.

Summoning all your courage, you stepped into the sea, feeling the biting cold on your exposed skin. You clenched your teeth, the chill nipping at your lower lip as you endured it for her. For five years, you had been having these clandestine encounters with Ariel, braving the icy waters just to be with her. Waist-deep in the water, you perched on a rock, waiting with bated breath for her arrival.

As the cold seemed to intensify, you pressed your head against the stone, contemplating how to share the news of the arranged wedding with Ariel. Lost in thought, you suddenly noticed movement in the water – a beautiful teal tail adorned with red scales and golden bracelets. A head emerged as searching for someone, wearing a golden crown that shimmered in the moonlight—it was her.

Your tired eyes lit up with affection as you caught sight of Ariel. A smile tugged at your lips when her gaze met yours, Ariel playfully dove back into the water, her lithe form slicing through the moonlit reflection. The sight of her perfect, asymmetrical face and fiery red hair stirred the unquenchable flame of your love. As she approached, it became evident that she intended to playfully tackle you.

"Wait, Ariel, don't—" you called out, but it was too late. With joyous laughter, she leaped into your arms, and together you both sank into the water. Ariel's arms wrapped around your neck, and you opened your eyes underwater, her image slightly distorted but no less beautiful. Her playful spirit prevailed as she pulled you into an underwater kiss, and you tenderly placed your hand on her cheek, reciprocating the love.

As you both resurfaced, gasping for breath but laughing with delight, your foreheads pressed together in an intimate embrace. The reunion after two weeks apart felt like a moment of pure magic, and the joy of being back in each other's arms overwhelmed you. The gentle lapping of the waves served as a soothing backdrop to the emotions swirling between you.

"I missed you so much, Ariel," you said, your voice filled with genuine longing, as you pulled her close, relishing the feeling of her in your arms again. With your head resting on top of hers, you found solace in the intimacy of the embrace, as if no one else existed at that moment except the two of you.

"I missed you too, my love. Two weeks felt like an eternity without you," Ariel whispered her voice tender and filled with warmth. Nuzzling against your neck, she showered you with soft, wet kisses, expressing the depth of her longing and affection. Each touch of her lips on your skin sent delightful shivers down your spine, and you couldn't help but emit a soft whine, overcome by the overwhelming rush of lust you felt for her.

"I have a surprise for you," she murmured, Ariel's lips moved closer to your ear, and her warm breath tickled your skin, making your heart race even faster. "But I'll show it to you later."

Amidst the euphoria of being reunited, you couldn't help but feel a tinge of urgency, knowing that there was something important you needed to share with Ariel. A shadow lingered in the corner of your mind, a haunting thought that had been plaguing your consciousness for too long. As much as you wanted to savor this romantic moment, you knew that sooner or later, you would have to tell her the truth.

"Ariel," you said softly, your voice tinged with vulnerability, she hummed in response still nestled between your neck, "There's something I need to tell you."

"The court put me in an arranged marriage, and I'm getting married in 3 days," you muttered, your voice trembling, and your grip tightened around Ariel's body. Her face was nestled between your neck, planting wet hot kisses, but at the sound of your words, she froze, and her closed eyes shot open, registering the weight of what you said. After a couple of minutes that felt like an eternity, she relaxed again, brushing it off with a laugh.

"Married? Oh, come on, that's ridiculous," Ariel teased with a forced grin, trying not to believe the gravity of the situation. However, when she noticed the seriousness in your expression and the absence of laughter on your lips, her smile faded, and a flicker of something else appeared in her eyes. She continued, her tone gentle as she gently caressed your cheek, "Well... refuse, it's a simple thing to do."

"I can't refuse," you said softly, looking back at her. Her captivating gaze held you captive, and despite the tears that welled up in your eyes, you couldn't look away. Ariel briskly swam away from your embrace, positioning herself in front of you, maintaining that intense eye contact that made it hard to breathe.

"Of course you can…I will make them-" Ariel mumbled out, her irritation evident, but you could also see her fin tail twitching anxiously. Her blue eyes welled up with tears, a mix of frustration and hurt, you could feel the hurt in her voice.

"Ariel, please," you interrupted, mustering all the strength you could find to face the reality of the situation. Your throat tightened, making it difficult to speak, and tears streamed down your face. "You don't even exist for them…"

"So this is it for us?" Ariel asked incredulously, her eyes searching yours for any glimmer of hope. The weight of her question hung heavy in the air, and a mix of emotions flickered across her face – disbelief, sadness, and a tinge of desperation.

"I don't want it to be…uh…I love you Ariel, but I can't simply pass over this," you said, your voice filled with bitterness and desperation. As you looked at her with teary eyes, your breaths came in huffs, and it became increasingly difficult to breathe. You didn't want any of this; you hated seeing the hurt swimming in her eyes. Knowing she might hate you for this only added to your agony, after all, it was your fault-

"Loving someone means going through everything you can imagine, even death... If you can't do this, you can't love," Ariel said angrily through gritted teeth, her teary eyes locking onto yours. Hurt filled your gaze, and you could feel her words striking your heart like a dagger. Your emotions were overwhelming, and tears streamed down your cheeks as you tried to find the strength to respond.

A heavy silence engulfed the air, interrupted only by your sobs and Ariel's heavy breathing. Without a word, Ariel turned away, diving back into the water, swimming away from you. You could only watch helplessly, tears blurring your vision as she distanced herself. In the place where she stood, a shiny object caught your eye, your trembling hands reached for it, revealing a delicate ring. A pink pearl adorned the center, encircled by elegant purple pearls. Your heart sank as you realized what it was –

It was an engagement ring- She was going to propose to you.

"W-WAIT, COME BACK!" you desperately cried out, clutching the ring to your chest as if it held the key to bringing her back. Your breaths came in ragged gasps, and tears blurred your vision, but you continued to call out her name. When it became evident that she wasn't going to return, you sobbed even harder, feeling your vision blur and your breath hitch. You would do anything to make her stay, to mend the wounds that had torn you apart.

"Don't leave me....."

Don'tleavedon'tleavedon'tleavedon'tleavedon'tleavedon'tleavedon'tleavedon'tleavedon'tleavedon'tleavedon'tleavedon'tleavedon'tleavedon'tleavedon'tleavedon'tleavedon'tleavedon'tleavedon'tleavedon'tleavedon'tleavedon'tleavedon'tleavedon'tleavedon'tleavedon'tleavedon'tleavedon'tleavedon'tleavedon'tleavedon'tleavedon'tleavemeDON'T LEAVE ME-

"Your majesty?" Eric whispered, awkwardness evident in his voice as you whipped your head startled to look at him, you noticed that he was concerned.

As you slowly regained consciousness, you found yourself in an unfamiliar place, disoriented and bewildered. The world around you seemed hazy, and a faint static sound echoed in your ears, further adding to the confusion. Turning your head, you noticed Eric standing by your side, his expression a mix of concern and bewilderment.

"Where am I? What's...?" you mumbled, your voice weak and filled with uncertainty. Your memory seemed to be clouded, and you struggled to make sense of your surroundings.

"You're in the church, about to become queen," Eric whispered gently, trying to offer some clarity amidst the fog of confusion. He furrowed his brow, trying to comprehend why you were asking such a question, unsure if you were joking or genuinely unaware of the significance of the moment.

The hushed murmurs and lingering gazes only amplified the pressure you felt. The air seemed thick with anticipation and tension, and you could almost taste the apprehension that hung in the atmosphere. Each whispered word seemed to swirl together, your head began to throb, the pulsating pain mirroring the internal struggle within you. The dizzying array of thoughts and conflicting emotions left you feeling disoriented and on the verge of being consumed by the noise.

"Are you alright? Should i get the doctors?" Eric asked softly, his face etched with worry as he noticed you had been staring at the scepter for quite some time. You glanced around and noticed the people in the room looking at you with pity, causing a tinge of embarrassment to flush your cheeks.

"N-No there's no need I'm alright," you mumbled, forcing a tired smile as you met Eric's gaze. Yet, deep within, a gnawing sense of unease had taken root. Your eyes then returned to the bishop, who held the scepter before you.

You took a deep breath, closing your eyes for a moment, trying to steady yourself. You reminded yourself of the reason you were here – to make the right choice for yourself and for the kingdom, to follow your heart even in the face of opposition.

As your outstretched hand tremulously reached for the scepter, an eerie chill swept through your bones, sending shivers down your spine. The air seemed to thicken with an intangible unease, and a voice inside your mind whispered doubtfully, questioning the morality of your actions. The gravity of the moment weighed heavily on your conscience, leaving you in a state of peculiar detachment from the reality that once felt so familiar. The allure of power clashed with the pangs of uncertainty, entangling you in a web of conflicting emotions, making you question if this path was truly meant for you.

Amid this disconcerting moment, a thousand unblinking eyes fixated upon you. However, their gazes appeared surreal, mere specters dancing at the fringes of your vision. The momentous occasion should have been filled with grandeur and significance, yet an inexplicable sense of isolation pervaded your being. As the ornate crown was reverently placed upon your head, a resounding applause erupted around you, signifying that you're their new queen. But the jubilation felt distant, drowned in a disconcerting symphony of static that seemed to echo within your mind, your throat tightened, and panic clawed at you, but you forced yourself to maintain the regal smile.

You now stood alone, with no one genuinely on your side.

𝑻𝑨𝑮𝑳𝑰𝑺𝑻...

@yuugen-benni

𝗔𝗹𝗹 𝗿𝗶𝗴𝗵𝘁𝘀 𝗿𝗲𝘀𝗲𝗿𝘃𝗲𝗱 © 2023 𝗩𝘀𝗸𝗸𝗼𝗹𝘆𝗮𝗮. 𝗣𝗹𝗲𝗮𝘀𝗲 𝗱𝗼 𝗻𝗼𝘁 𝗰𝗼𝗽𝘆, 𝗿𝗲𝗽𝗼𝘀𝘁, 𝘁𝗿𝗮𝗻𝘀𝗹𝗮𝘁𝗲, 𝗼𝗿 𝗺𝗼𝗱𝗶𝗳𝘆 𝗺𝘆 𝘄𝗼𝗿𝗸𝘀 𝗼𝗻 𝗮𝗻𝘆 𝗽𝗹𝗮𝘁𝗳𝗼𝗿𝗺.

[lychniis]

❝ i know who i am when i'm alone, i'm something else when i see you. you don't understand, you should never know, how easy you are to need. ❞

HOZIER , IT WILL COME BACK

WELCOME TO ATTAR

the perfumery shall open shortly. please register here [ taglist ], to book an appointment. CLICK HERE TO VIEW UPDATES.

fandoms : genshin impact, honkai star rail

i. WITH THE COMING OF OCTOBER, it's time to set forth kinktober '23! i really appreciate the amount of support i have received from you guys over the past year spent in this blog and i've decided to dip my toes into posting some mature content alongside my usual sfw works!

ii. LET MONSTERS AND HORROR serve our theme, where i hope to entice you with smut ( that has too much plot *shivers in qinxing in the mountain* ), all presented with an array of perfumes to chose from. many thanks to @crystalflygeo for prompt ideas kjhgvbhnj.

iii. PLEASE NOTE THAT THE SCHEDULE IS NOT A FIXED DATE. due to my own projects and college hounding me, the fics will be posted at my own time, though i will endeavor to try and keep them within the constraints of october. they might end up far longer than i would have originally intended.

COMING SOON ON OCTOBER

( note ) : the content linked below is unsuitable for minors. by clicking 'view more', you are verifying yourself as a consenting adult. if you are not of consenting age, then please dni with this post.

SCENT ONE : ( GARDENIA ) ❝ ARARE LITUS ❞ feat. neuvillette.

people round the port have gone missing in the recent weeks, their bodies found by the beaches, clearly having drowned to their miserable ends. neuvillette questions the motives of the person behind it, till he notices the presence of an inquisitive oceanfolk beneath the waters.

⚠︎ CW : mermaid ! reader, dragon ! neuvillete, mentioned murder, reader being very naïve in terms of how humans work, angst / hurt / comfort, fluff domesticity, give these guys a hug, canon compliant, first time, lingerie, temperature play, gentle sex, mutual masturbation, body worship, overstimulation.

SCENT TWO : ( PEONY ) ❝ RARA AVIS IN TERRUS ❞ feat. zhongli.

the world was a dangerous place, for one like you. as the hunters draw close, you seek refuge in a dragon's lair, hoping to find a way to live. the dragon in question lingers close and tolerates your presence. you wonder when he'd demand for more. birds, after all, were so easily torn apart by claws and fangs.

⚠︎ CW : bird hybrid ! reader, dragon ! zhongli, monsterfucking, trafficking and hunting, reader had a pretty rough past prior to this, angst / hurt / comfort, fluff, some attempts at world building, canon divergent / au, mating cycles / heat, breeding kink, orgasm denial, size kink, biting / scratching, bondage, sensory deprivation.

SCENT THREE : ( ORCHID ) ❝ TANQUAM EX UNGUE LEONEM ❞ feat. jing yuan

you try to live your life the best you can. you try to be a good person despite the world wearing you down. however, upon stumbling into abcast away angel with liquid madness running through his veins, the loneliness your four walls bring is replaced with something else. meanwhile jing yuan learns of human fragility and how simple it is, for memories to fade away.

⚠︎ CW : canon divergent, angel ! jing yuan, mara plays a part here, talks about mortality and existentialism, reader is terrified and touchstarved, angst and tragedy, bittersweet ending i suppose, sacrifices, face sitting, electrostimulation, strip tease, mirror sex, praise kink, blindfolds, dom / sub.

SCENT FOUR : ( HYDRANGEA ) ❝ ABYSSUS ABYSSUM INVOCAT ❞ feat. childe

you needed to run, run far away lest the monster beneath your bed devours you whole. childe, however, keeps the chase, for he hungers. he was a charming man, that you could agree with; but the demon he hides away scares you and his undying loyalty to the tsaritsa shall be your undoing.

⚠︎ CW : canon compliant, slight foul legacy ! childe, angst and betrayal, bittersweet ending, reader and childe are childhood friends, making a choice, self sacrifice, breath play, masochism, bruises, predator / prey, against a wall, rough sex, dry humping.

taglist — @silentmoths @crystalflygeo @moraxsthrone @hiraethsdesires @dustofthedailylife @celestewritestoomuch @genshinboys @kaelily @ofoceansandtombsanew

AINE | 2023. do no plagiarize, repost or rework this piece.

[vikwrites]

Copacabana - Tony Stark

Summary ➣ A letter to Tony Stark, 16 years after his death. Pairing ➣ Tony Stark x Widowed! Reader Word Count ➣ 681

October 17, 2039.

Dear Tony, 

It’s been 16 years since you left this world, October 17, 2023, 16 long years. 

It's surreal to think that it's been this long. At times, it feels as if we're still the teenagers who first fell head-over-heels for each other, dreaming of a future without any obstacles in our way. 

The memory of our first kiss still lingers, like a cool breeze on a warm autumn day, in the midst of an October rain, our clothes soaked and sticking to our skin. Young and reckless, having just graduated from MIT with bright futures ahead of us. But in that moment, all that mattered was the taste of your lips, the warmth of your body pressed against mine. The world faded away as we stood there in the rain, lost in each other's embrace.

I watched as you slowly rebuilt Stark Industries after the passing of your father. We had just eloped to California, swept away by our passionate love, keen for a fresh start. But money had changed you. I tried to understand the pressure of carrying millions on your shoulders, but it became harder to reconcile with who you were becoming. Yet, despite it all, my love for you never wavered. 

I remember when you were captured in Afghanistan. Those 3 bitter months, I didn’t know if you would return or not. Then you came back, and in your chest was embedded an arc reactor, a false, mechanical pump; keeping you alive, but deep down, I knew you still had a heart. You changed so much after that, like you lost a part of yourself in that cave.

Then the world crashed upon us—aliens, Avengers, and everything in between.

The moments in between felt like a hazy blur, my mind struggling to hold onto the images as they slipped through my fingers like sand. I remembered catching glimpses of you on the news, especially in your impenetrable armour, well. We thought it was, but that fateful day on Titan proved otherwise. 

And it hasn’t been the same since.

Morgan, our little girl. She’s just been accepted into MIT, just like you’ve always dreamed of. In a few years, she’ll be getting her PhD in electrical engineering, just like her father did; hopefully, she’ll inherit Stark Industries and continue on our legacy. As proud as I am, it's bittersweet, to see her follow in your footsteps. I know you would have been so proud of her. But at the same time, it brings up all the painful emotions of losing you and wondering how different things would be if you were still here. 

Morgan misses you a lot, she really does.

On rainy days, we’d sit outside the cabin. As rain splattered against the wooden porch, Morgan would curl next to me, tucking her small hand into mine. She would turn to me with big, curious eyes; "Tell me about Dad," she said, wanting to know more about the man she never got to meet, and I would weave fantastical tales of his bravery, how he fearlessly battled against evil to protect us, but deep down, I knew that he had been just as scared and uncertain as the rest of us, scared that he would lose us.

The humidity feels nice, we seek solace these days, finding comfort in the melancholy beauty that accompanies them. But my heart aches as I think about how much you loved these moments, we used to sit by the lake, talking about how we’d get older in each other's arms, yet you're no longer here to join us. 

Occasionally, we’d still leave a cheeseburger out for you, hoping that somehow you can still taste it in another world. It's a silly habit, but it's all we have left to cling to your memory. We know you're no longer here with us, but our hearts refuse to accept it. It's our way of holding onto you, even though we know you're gone.

We miss you, Tony, and I hope I’ll get to see you again. 

I love you 3000.

⎊ back to masterlist

[crow-raven-crow]

Holaa, podrias hacer un fic de Larissa inspirado en la canción "Young and beautiful-Lana del rey" algo demasiado romántico, por favoooor 🙏💗

𝐈 𝐊𝐧𝐨𝐰 𝐘𝐨𝐮 𝐖𝐢𝐥𝐥..

𝐨𝐧𝐞 𝐬𝐡𝐨𝐭

✧･.☽˚｡･ﾟ✧ :══════⊹⊹══════: ✧･ﾟ｡˚☾.･✧

𝐋𝐚𝐫𝐢𝐬𝐬𝐚 𝐖𝐞𝐞𝐦𝐬 𝐱 𝐟!𝐑𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫 𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐝𝐬: ~2.5k 𝐬𝐩𝐞𝐜𝐢𝐟𝐢𝐜 𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬/𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐧𝐭: LYRIC FIC, angst, insecurity, flashbacks, issues with looks and self image, mentions of time and aging, insecurity within aging and looks, bittersweet feeling, crying, anxiety, FLUFF, lyrics are jumbled but in order of the song

𝐬𝐮𝐦𝐦𝐚𝐫𝐲: see ask above

𝐦𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭

AO3 link in title ✧･.☽˚｡･ﾟ✧ :══════⊹⊹══════: ✧･ﾟ｡˚☾.･✧

✧･.☽˚｡･ﾟ✧ :══════⊹⊹══════: ✧･ﾟ｡˚☾.･✧

The purple and blue hues of the night sky were slowly making themselves known with the moonlight, taking over the welcomed warmth that was casted over the blonde. Her eyes fluttered across the screen, her fingers moving rapidly against the laptop keys as the tapping was the only sound that filled the room. With a heavy sigh, she hit the final button, sending off the email and finishing her work for the day.

I've seen the world..

She leaned back into her chair, seeking comfort in the leather backing as the disappearance of the sun made itself known to her, making the room dark and cold in the presence of the moon. She had gone hours with no break, working off the determination to get everything done for a relaxing weekend that always seemed to run from her grasp. Of course, reality had different plans, as a light ping came from her laptop and signaled the delivery of a new email.

Done it all..

She closed her laptop in defeat, capturing her face in the palms of her hands as she gave herself a moment to just be, but the tiredness that sat underneath her skin became all consuming as it enveloped her entire being. Her hands moved down her face, dragging and pulling the skin lightly before landing against her thighs. She turned her chair to face out the window, choosing to distract herself in the endless tree line, only to be met with her own reflection staring back at her against the cool glass.

Had my cake now..

She took in the state of her features - her tired eyes, her growing bags, her tense shoulders.. and the deep frown that sat on her lips. Her bones felt heavier than normal, weighing her soul down and allowing an emptiness to settle within her chest. Everything about her screamed exhausted, casting one thought to the forefront of her mind: When had she gotten so.. old?

The insecurity clawed its way into her throat, closing it up and making her eyes burn with the realization. She brought a hand up to her face, fingers tracing along the features that now showed themselves so unpleasantly. Aged, awful, vile, revolting, worn down.. her..

She thought back to a time where she felt younger, a time where she felt better, one of the many times she spent with you..

~~

Hot summer nights, mid-July..

You danced with the heat of the setting sun, sand softening every step as you both moved along with the waves of the deep blue ocean. A city line met you on your other side, so far into the distance that only the lights were seen from this far. There was no music playing, no work to be done and no meetings to be had.. The sounds of your laughter moving along with the breeze as your hands were in hers, making your honeymoon a core memory within you both.

Where you and I were forever wild..

She pulled you along with her, spinning you and pulling your body flush to hers and repeating the action time and time again. The sound of your laugh filled her heart, making it beat faster and soar along with the clouds that sat above you both in the sky. There was a moment where you had lost your footing, one foot planting itself so deep into the sand that the next move had you toppling over.

The crazy days..

Her back met the yellow and brown grains as she attempted to catch you, your legs tangling together as you fell on top of her. Her hold around you was tight, only loosening as your gaze met hers. After realizing that you were both okay, smiles overtook your lips and your chests rumbled as laughs escaped them.

City lights..

A calm washed over you both after the laughing fit. Choosing to relish in the moment, you moved beside her and rested your head against her chest, enjoying the sound of her heartbeat and soft breaths. One of her hands smoothed along your side, drawing soothing circles, while the other rested on top of yours.

The way you'd play with me like a child..

She'd never felt so at peace, so at home than when she was with you. Your existence had opened something dormant within her, bringing all of her best features forward, bringing no fear to let all of her insecurities and doubts come to light , bringing a safeness into her life and having her find the comfort within her own skin that she had lost so long ago..

~~

Will you still love me when I'm no longer young and beautiful..?

Her mind caught back up with her body, a deep insecurity flooding through her veins and making her heart feel heavy. The tears that had formed just before now fell freely down her face, dipping into every curve and crease her face had to offer. She let in a harsh breath at the realization, the air burning her ever closing lungs and making her quickly move to rub the tears away.

Channeling angels in the new age now..

There was a bittersweet feeling now locked with that memory. It was years ago, still filled with the same feelings she had during that trip, but that was when she was much younger.. and oh how time and age loved to display itself against her face..

All the ways..

The sound of her heavy office doors opening made her actions still, the familiar creek of the hinges and a stream of golden light filling the room behind her. You were quite at first, letting your eyes adjust to the barely lit room. Then, when your eyes focused on your lover, you nearly ran to her as worry consumed you.

I got to know..

Everything that was on your mind before this was long forgotten. Your movements slowed when you had gotten in front of her, your heels softly clicking against the floor as you took in her defeated state. You hadn't seen her like this in months, but it pulled on your heart strings all the same. Your lover was hurting..

Your pretty face and electric soul..

Her eyes were glossy, a shine coming off them as the sliver of moonlight twinkled against the unfallen tears. Her fingers moved between each other, wringing and smoothing against her own skin as her nerves made their way in. Her shoulders were slumped, but there was still a tenseness found in her form. Even in a moment like this she was the most beautiful being you had ever seen, but your heart ached seeing her in such pain.

Will you still love me..

You lifted your hand up slowly, as if a normal movement would scare her, and wiped a tear away from her face, brushing a fallen strand of hair behind her ear after you did so. You turned her chin, making her look at you for the first time since you'd arrived, and met her gaze with all your concern shining in your eyes.

When I got nothing..

You moved your hand away and allowed her a moment to ground herself. Her head tilted to the side a bit in confusion as she looked at you, for she couldn't understand why, in the state she was in, that you still looked at her as though she had hung all the stars. It caused more tears to fall from the sapphire goddess, each drop and each heavy breath breaking her walls down more and more.

But my aching soul..

Your body moved without your knowledge, bringing yourself closer to the blonde as she openly wept before you. Moments in which she cried were rare, so the scene before you ate you up with worry, digging into your bones and gnawing at your flesh as your mind raced with the sight of her.

Dear Lord..

You knelt down in front of her, your hands meeting her knees and rubbing against the cold skin exposed there. You moved them up with each circle, bringing her back to you with every second that passed. You leaned in slowly, placing a soft kiss against each of her knees to let her know that you were there when she was ready.

When I get to Heaven..

She looked down at you, her tears coming to a halt as your expression took her breath away. Your brows were furrowed, eyes moving between her own in distress, your body rocking softly as your touch gave her the warmth and comfort she so badly craved.

Please let me bring my man..

She leaned forward, her hands coming to rest on top of yours, as she readied herself to speak, to voice out the demons that plagued her mind. Her gaze faltered as she spoke, not finding the confidence in herself to fully face the reality of her mind. "Age can be terrible thing to face in all its physicality.."

When she comes, tell me that you'll let her in..

You took a breath in at her words, truly understanding the exact place that her mind was in. You turned your hands over, thumbs smoothing over each of her knuckles as you thought of what you could say. You were going through the same thing, time showing it's common signs against your features, and you found comfort within it. But it never got rid of the heaviness of looking back on who you once were, what you once looked like before the weight of age took you in its hold.

"But it's a sign that you lived.. And isn't that something beautiful within itself? Oh, what a privilege it is to live.." You shook you head while saying the last bit, removing you gaze to glimpse out the window before landing sparkling eyes back onto your wife, knowing that you would get to spend the rest of your days living with her.

Father, tell me if you can..

Your words shocked her, the softness and sincerity within your voice making her feel as though she could breathe, taking away the heaviness of the ocean found within her lungs. She had lived.. Through every up, passed every down, she had the privilege to have moments where she felt so undeniably human like this one.. More importantly, she had lived with you..

All that grace, all that body..

She broke her gaze away, shaking her head as she turned to face the window. "I'm not perfect-"

"I don't want perfect.. I want you.." She snapped her head back in your direction, taking in the tears forming in your eyes, acknowledging the small tremble of your bottom lip, understanding the pain that both of your hearts felt under the moonlight..

She's my sun, she makes me shine like diamonds..

"We are so brave that sometimes we forget that we can suffer.." You brought her hands up to your lips after you spoke, placing soft kisses against the backs of each of her hands before settling closer to the blonde. The love you held for each other ran so deep in the simplest forms but never failed to evolve and make you both fall for each other all over again. "We're lucky enough to have each other to fall back on, to have the other help pick up the pieces when we are inevitably broken down.."

Will you still love me when I'm no longer young and beautiful..?

"You make me feel like I am strong enough to rebuild the parts of me that have been broken…" Her voice was weak, somewhere lost in the plane of pitiful yet worthwhile existence. It cracked and broke as the words came out, translating the beginning of the slow rebuild that we all faced as time slipped from us.

Will you still love me when I got nothing but my aching soul..?

"You are strong.. in every aspect of the word. And this," you gestured your hand towards her in this state, "doesn't lessen that, love.. I think it's even more powerful and admirable that you are allowing yourself to feel and work through these things.. To be so vulnerable and face that is to be strong.."

I know you will..

You brought yourself back to your feet, settling between her legs to keep your close proximity as you hands smoothed up her body. You cupped her face in your hands, bringing your lips to every wrinkle, each side of crows feet, each smile line, every sign of life that had made its existence known against her face. You ended it off with a gentle kiss to her forehead, appreciating the smile that lifted to her lips as her hands rested against your hips.

Will you still love me when I'm no longer beautiful..?

Your thumbs wiped over her cheeks, drying her tears away, and you loved how she rested against your fingertips, her own love and trust forever being shown to you. Her eyes fluttered shut for just a moment, true peace meeting her once again and reminding her of the highs that always followed the lows. Your eyes met hers, moving between them both as you held the heaviest weight of all your emotions within your words. "I love you.."

Will you still love me..

The words ran so deep through her veins that she was grounded within the moment, her soul seeping into each word as though she had heard them escape your lips for the first time. Her hands wrapped around your wrists, fingers flattening against the backs of your hands.

When I'm not young and beautiful..

There was nothing but undying love and admiration swirling within your eyes, something that shook her to her core and made her soul once again dance with yours along the sand of a memory. There was no more doubt, no more worry found within her after the display of the love you held for her. She was your brightest star in the sky, and that truth was made known to her time and time again.

"I love you too.." She finally said, her mind catching up to reality as she brought herself up to her feet. Your hands slid down her shoulders, smoothing out the fabric of her dress before they met her back, pressing her into you.

“You’re beautiful, my love.. I love living with you..” She melted into you as you did her, her head coming to rest against your shoulder as her breath kissed the crook of her neck when you spoke. The silence that followed was a comfortable one, any and all tension from the previous emotions disappearing with the no longer evident sun.

The safety the she felt in your arms consumed her, your hearts coming face to face as your chests pressed against each other, the feeling of home taking over you both as you stood there. The love that was felt was one to be had for an eternity, making the existence of all else kneel before it.

There is a beauty in living - traces of it found within everything human, everything broken, and everything built back up and loved again..

~~

✧･.☽˚｡･ﾟ✧ :══════⊹⊹══════: ✧･ﾟ｡˚☾.･✧

𝐚/𝐧: UMMM?? THIS MADE MY HEART HURT MANNNNN COME ON

baby girl larissa deserves the world i swear she needs all the love she can get

found some time! worked on this request just in time for Gwen's birthday!! Happy Birthday Gwendoline Christie <33 I hope she knows just how much she means to all of us and just how much of an impact she's made on all of our lives. she's truly amazing and i'll forever be thankful for having such brilliant and beautiful inspiration in my life AND for the community she unknowingly created.

I made her some art ! You can find it here

I was definately inspired by the way she speaks in this.. Her words are so beautiful and so well put together that they're so powerful and always strike something within me.

I hope you enjoyed this one, anon :) It was really really nice to write

x,

~ 𝐜𝐫𝐨𝐰𝐯𝐲𝐧

✧･.☽˚｡･ﾟ✧ :══════⊹⊹══════: ✧･ﾟ｡˚☾.･✧

𝐭𝐚𝐠𝐬: (tagged anyone who asked/wanted to be on the "all works" taglist) ask to be added, if you'd like xx

@weemssapphic @readingtheentrails @finnja555 @barbarasstar @vendocrap8008 @gwendolinechristieiscute @lilfartbox1 @agathaandgwenslesbian @lvinhs @elvira-dear @kimiinou

✧･.☽˚｡･ﾟ✧ :══════⊹⊹══════: ✧･ﾟ｡˚☾.･✧

[dustofthedailylife]

"There Are A Million Reasons To Be Happy - But You Are Mine."

Alhaitham x (gn!)Reader tags// angst, very bittersweet, no comfort, mentions of death

A/N: Short drabble that I needed to get out of my system sjdklsjkf. I do not take any responsibility for any possible emotional damage this may cause btw... *cough*

You never thought the day you'd lose Alhaitham forever would come so soon. Not when you had still planned to do so much together. Not when you still had your entire life ahead of you.

But then that fatal accident happened no one could have possibly foreseen.

Never in a million years did you think that Alhaitham would be taken from you in such a cruel way. Never did you expect you'd wish him a nice day in the morning and would never be able to hear his voice again after.

Now you were sitting on the cold stone floor of his office in your shared home seeking comfort in flipping through the pages of his favorite books.

Your throat too coarse to scream anymore, your body too weak to spill more tears. Numbness was the only thing left inside your hollow heart.

The spines and pages of the books before you were worn down by the excessive use they had found on a daily basis. And yet they felt familiar - comforting.

Little notes on some pages, bookmarks stuck in between others that made you feel like he was still with you. Made you feel like he was about to come home and would continue reading where he left off the day prior.

They felt like a little piece of him that was proof that he existed. That he was once part of your life.

And then you found the book in the drawer of his desk. It was a small olive-green leather book titled "Reasons To Be Happy". You had never seen it before yet it felt like it contained a key part of him.

You picked it up with shaky hands and began flipping through the pages. But soon your vision became blurred. Tears, you no longer knew you were able to spill, pooled in your eyes and left wet streaks in their wake as they cascaded down your face once more. Because as soon as you realized what the contents of the little book in your hands were, your heart shattered into a million pieces.

It contained a compendium of handwritten entries dating all the way back to the day you and Alhaitham met.

Everything you had done since that had filled him with joy, every trip and memory that had made him smile, no matter how minuscule they might've seemed to you - they were in here, recorded forever.

"You kissed my forehead and draped a blanket over me when you thought I fell asleep on the sofa." "You gifted me the book I briefly mentioned I wanted." "We went on a trip to a desert oasis together today. You're the reason I find enjoyment in even the most desolate places." "You were surprised you got the job you applied for, but I always knew you would. Your beaming smile that day made me fall in love all over again."

And the title page read: "There are a million reasons to be happy and a million things to find happiness in - but you are mine."

Do not repost, copy, translate or edit - © dustofthedailylife || reblogs, comments, and asks about Genshin, HSR or my fics are always greatly appreciated and motivate me!

[kth1fics]

KTH1 MASTERLIST

© All rights reserved under @kth1fics​​ / @kth1​ - do not copy, repost, modify, edit, or translate any of my work without my direct consent. This TUMBLR and AO3 are the ONLY places my fics are posted.

Unless stated otherwise, all my writings are generally nsfw (18+). All works are marked with a rating for a reason, if you are underage please click away! All works are pure fiction. Stories do not reflect the real life persons. Characterization is my own. 🍓

✶ Apples in February | werewolf au | fluff, smut

↠ Jin was the type to make you feel good, to show you all your worth. Always understanding of another, you accept the fate of being his mate.

✶ Cherry Topper | idiots/friends to lovers au | fluff, smut

↠ Seokjin is a busy man with a full schedule on his plate at all times. He’s getting through it so he can finally have you though.

✶ The Imminent | demon au | royalty au | smut, horror

↠ A princess from a royal family buys assistance from a witch in the woods to seek out a yellow-eyed demon who can save your ill-fated father, the King.

✶ Winter Whiskey | established relationship au | fluff, smut

↠ Taking your annual friendcation with your loving boyfriend, Jin, the two of you share heartwarming memories together while resting and relaxing.

✶ Again | vampire au | smut

↠ History with a vampire, you think I’d be over it by now. Yoongi comes and goes as he pleases. But why does he keep coming back?

✶ Cut Shot | boyfriend au | fluff, smut

↠ Summer vacation has many moments of fun loving gestures, even when Yoongi goes out of his way to pick up the sport you love playing.

✶ Get Jinxed | cyberpunk au | angst, smut

↠ You battle with the decision between the justice of the law and the rogue ex cop who has you wrapped around his finger.

✶ The Little Things | boyfriend au | fluff, smut

↠ When the present isn’t exactly enough for you right now, Yoongi is here for you through it all.

✶ Tiger Layer | royalty au | smut

↠ You are here to serve your king. In any way he pleases.

✶ Welcome Home | marriage au | fluff, smut

↠ After picking up your husband at the airport, you greet him with what any lonely wife would in the comfort of your shared bedroom.

✶ Crosscurrents | mermaid au, royal au | soft, fluff, fantasy

↠ A bittersweet scaly tale about a lovely mer-prince who falls for a beautiful land princess.

✶ Protecting the Bloodline | vampire au | smut

↠ Understanding the role you were given by the Church you took on your duty of serving the one Prince you choose with ultimate pride.

✶ South Side | gang au, bad boy au | strangers to lovers | smut

↠ You’re too curious about the alluring, dangerous bad boy down in the south side of the city.

✶ Atmosphere | celebrity/boyfriend au | smut, fluff

↠ Namjoon and you have been dating for a few years now, fully aware of the worries a relationship with a celebrity would be like.

✶ Mishap | relationship au | smut, slight angst

↠ You wonder what path you’re heading down when you keep finding yourself in his bed.

✶ Caught Elvesdropping | christmas au | smut, fluff, pining

↠ This Christmas season you find yourself caught in a consistent magnetic attraction to the most handsome North Pole Elf ever.

✶ My Princess | vampire au | smut

↠ An event to celebrate the possible new world of coexisting among the supernatural. you were reluctant at first, not wanting to indulge yourself back into this type of life. But a silver-haired man from a royal family ended up changing your mind.

✶ Safe Haven | werewolf au | fluff, smut

↠ When a wolf protects the royal family for many years, he’s faced with one special princess who he’ll do anything for.

✶ Shake Shack | strangers to lovers au | fluff, smut

↠ Crushing on a man ever since high school, you failed time and time again to actively talk to him. Until one sweaty summer day, you finally developed the courage to ask him out on a date.  

✶Strictly Confidential | slice of life au | smut

↠ How did you find yourself messing around with him when he’s publicly with someone else? I guess what’s what makes a secret relationship... well, a secret.

✶ 00:00 (Zero O’clock) | slice of life au | super fluff, smut

↠ A night full of movies and intimate conversations with the love of your life and his fluffy dog whom you love more than anything leads into something more.

✶ Aberrant | hybrid au | fluff, smut

↠ Meeting a handsome and rare fox hybrid was the last thing you had expected in a world of coexisting hybrids.

✶ Baddie | situationship au | smut

↠ The bad boy in your life, Kim Taehyung, comes visiting once again for his basic needs to be met.

✶ Down Bad | boyfriend au | ft. yoongi | poly, smut

↠ To spice up your sex life even more, your boyfriend, Taehyung, suggests a brand-new offer to you. One that includes another piece of Daegu that is extremely hard to resist.

✶ Dream | boyfriend au | fluff, smut

↠ Your subconscious was messing with you a little too much, leaving you restless, nervous, and weary. Taehyung is here to reassure you though.

✶ Game Point | volleyball au | smut

↠ TBA!

✶ Let’s Try Again | slice of life au | smut

↠ Taehyung, your husband and father of your child(ren), continues to lead a teasing game which consists of persistence, dedication, dirty talk, and more.

✶ Northdows Forest | faerie au | smut

↠ A lovely interaction with a newfound magical creature who has round peculiar eyes, wispy red hair, and beautiful silk wings.

✶ Playful Dominance | werewolf au | smut

↠ As a werewolf, being separated from your mate is hard, it takes a toll on your emotional, mental, and physical being. You’re sad, you’re lonely, and you’re horny.

✶ Tanzanite Treasures | mermaid au | fluff, smut

↠ You’re met with a handsome man who hands you back your missing necklace given to you by your late grandmother. What you didn’t know is that the necklace holds such a powerful secret about life under the sea.

✶ The Sheets | idol au | smut

↠ On your night out with the gals you get hit up by the one and only, Kim Taehyung, who’s been eyeing all of your Instagram stories. It’s no shocker that he attempts to get you back to his place once you finally decide to leave the club because this isn’t your first rodeo with the determined and insanely hot, fuckboy.

✶ Welcome to Woodsboro | scream au | smut, crack

↠ One generation’s tragedy is the next one’s joke as two horror enthusiasts set out to visit California’s most infamous murder site, Woodsboro.

Series:

✤ Black Ravens m.list : | vampire au | s2l, smut, angst, romance ↠   ❝What the world has to offer is much greater than you could ever imagine. Your life turns upside down when the captivating establishment, Black Ravens, grants you the unthinkable.❞  

✤ 2 Player Games m.list : | established relationship | fluff, smut ↠   ❝Your extremely, effortlessly attractive gamer boyfriend ends up being a bit too playful in a series of videogame ways!❞  

✶ BlueKooBerry | streamer au | fluff, smut

↠ He’s your lovely, most amazing, streamer boyfriend one could ask for.

✶ Long Time No See | werewolf au | angst, smut

↠ Jungkook shows up at the apartment door filled with animosity and unanswered questions. Where did he go? Why did he leave?

✶ Lucky, Lucky Girl | roommates au | pwp, smut

↠ The joy of Jungkook having a grand ol’ time with his own personal karaoke night causes you, his roommate, to grow more and more annoyed.

✶ Office Santa | office christmas party au | smut

↠ On the verge of leaving the office Christmas party, you find a reason to stay just a little bit longer.    

✶ Piquant | vampire au | angst, smut

↠ Jungkook is your awesome roommate who also happens to be a vampire. What could go wrong?

✶ To Find the Sheep | werewolf au | fairytale, angst, smut

↠ TBA!

✶ Christmas with Bangtan: Secret Santa | chrismas au  ⏤    ❝This holiday season we have a surprise in our own ways; seven gifts for seven days! A tasteful present from us to you, these seven lovely senders have tales and stories of seven men you wish you knew.❞  

✶ Be My Bangtanvine | valentine’s au  ⏤     ❝Featuring seven beautiful rose petal authors, we gift to you seven delectable stories in honor of this romantic holiday full of love and affection. From sour war-heads to the overly sweet chocolate hearts, we hope you enjoy our twists of fics!❞  

✶ The Last Splash | mermaid au  ⏤     ❝Surfs up dudes! Or, swim with some of those little fishies! To draw in the last bits of summer, seven authors have gathered together to give you that one last hoorah to end it off!❞    

✶ Briarwood Manor | vampire au  ⏤     ❝For the prince you come in favor for, you are endlessly indebted to them and only them for the rest of your days. You will be their property, for them to take and to use you to their liking as they give back security, safety, and shelter. You are born to provide the prince of your selection, raised on the purities of the world around you, a clean human offered under the blood moon.❞    

✶ Bangtan Cinema: Horror Night | movie au  ⏤     ❝Come watch read some haunted themes being featured at the Bangtan Cinemas! All stories based in a universe of a special horror-related movie! Isn’t that spook-tacular? So come on down, grab a couple of your friendly goons, some buttery popcorn, and enjoy 7 movies fics directed written by amazing and horrific authors!❞

✶ Paw Prints Academy | dog trainer au ⏤     ❝Welcome to the Paw Prints Academy for Dog Training and Behavior Program! Thank you for taking part in our community of puppy adoration and love. Seven authors have come to participate in telling a brand new story for you all; confidently trained by the best dog trainers PPA has to offer! We will continue to support and resource you with the softest, fluffiest, and wholesome interactions as you venture deeper into your program! We strive to give you the best dog training (fics) experience possible!❞