#so i don't have to worry about constantly changing schedules which is nice

[stairset]

I'm quitting my job soon and getting an actual full time job that actually pays well which is good cause my habit of impulse buying expensive things is returning

[vikkirosko]

The last story was amazing, hope you can get this one in before the holdidays, and have a nice vacation. And just a great next few months on top of that! But I was wondering ( sorry this may be long ) if you could do a headcanon of alastor, lucifer, Angel Dust, lucifer, fizz + Ozzie, and Rosie? ( sorry if that's to many characters there all just great characters ) x a reader who has CIP ( the inablility ) to feel pain? Thank you! Also how have you been?

I'm all good. I haven't had much free time lately, so I'm a little behind schedule on writing requests, but I still don't lose hope that I'll be able to finish everything before the end of the year. And how are you doing?

Headcanons CIP

🕷 Angel Dust x Reader 💖

You and Angel have known each other for a long time. You knew that he often got into various scuffles and always reminded him to be careful. One of the times you knew for sure that he was going to get into trouble, you went with him. You were right and helped him cope and not get hurt, but there was something that caused him concern. You were hit by several bullets, but you didn't seem to pay any attention to it at all

Only when you noticed the blood on your clothes did you say with irritation that you had ruined your favorite sweater. Angel jumped up to you, worried about your wounds, but you didn't seem to feel the pain, which you soon informed him about. That's why Angel took you back to the hotel, where he treated your wounds. You told him that you had a CIP. You haven't felt pain since you were born, even when you were human, and even in Hell, the absence of pain has remained with you

Angel was surprised that for so long he didn't know that you don't feel pain at all. You had to pay attention to little things so as not to harm yourself, for example, be careful about hot dishes, because you might not notice how hot the soup could be or how hot the cup of coffee was. Angel listened attentively to you, surprised that he didn't notice it

Angel has become more attentive towards you. He didn't constantly take care of you, but sometimes he reminded you that the food or drink was hot, that you held the knife too close to your fingers, or that you were injured. Angel understood that even if you didn't feel pain, it didn't mean that the wounds didn't hurt you, which is why he tried to take care of you at least a little

📻 Alastor x Reader🎙

Alastor found out that you don't feel pain when he noticed that you returned to the hotel with an injured leg. You weren't even limping. You just went to your room like everything was completely normal. He didn't know any other reason for this. He went to your room with a first-aid kit and you did not hide from him either your own wound or the fact that you really did not feel pain

Alastor stayed in your room while you treated the wound on your leg. You told him that even when you were human, you didn't feel pain. You assumed that at least in Hell this would change, but it turned out not to be so. Because of this, you didn't notice the wounds you could get until you noticed the blood on your clothes

The origin of the scars on your skin was now clear. He understood that you probably got these scars in Hell. On your palms, hands, and obviously not only there. You really weren't very worried about your own health, and the lack of pain only made it harder for you to take care of yourself

Alastor understood that in Hell there was much less harm from this for you. Dying in Hell was much more difficult for a sinner than when you were alive, so Alastor didn't worry too much about you. He knew you'd be fine, but he still left a first-aid kit in your room in case you needed it

💀Rosie x Reader 🌹

You were a frequent guest at Rosie's and helped her with some problems at her store. You often stayed at her house for weeks at a time, but Rosie was only too happy to spend time with you. Sometimes you came in with wounds after fights, but Rosie was sure they weren't that serious, so you didn't pay attention to it. However, when you came in seriously injured but behaved as if everything was fine, she became worried

Rosie insistently asked you to sit down and brought a first aid kit. She was in no hurry to ask questions or jump to conclusions, primarily focusing on your wounds. You didn't make a sound when she was treating your wounds, which gave Rosie certain thoughts

You honestly told her that you didn't feel pain at all. Even before your death, you had CIP and you learned to live with it, but in Hell you became more relaxed and took much less care of your own health, which led to your injury. Rosie listened to you carefully, then gently stroked your hair and asked you to be careful

Rosie didn't want you to try. She knew that you tried to be more attentive to yourself and tried to avoid new wounds. You didn't want to upset Rosie and make her worry, which is why you tried not to put yourself in danger, not even realizing that Rosie was ready to show those who would harm you why she was overlord

🍎 Lucifer Morningstar x Reader 🐍

Lucifer knew perfectly well that you didn't feel pain. You've known each other for a long time and he often saw you after fights. You didn't pay attention to the wounds, just talked irritably about stained or torn clothes. You both knew that the lack of feeling pain had its own characteristics, so you made sure that the wounds were treated, and Lucifer made sure that no one dared to hurt you

Lucifer was much stronger than you, and when you were together, no one dared even try to look at you askance, but sometimes you got involved in fights, especially when it was the end of the year. You didn't want to hide, even though you knew you could have died. Every time Lucifer found out that you were fighting again, he watched, taking his time to intervene. It was only when he saw that you were seriously injured that he intervened

Lucifer sometimes offered to pick up personal guards for you, but you kept telling him that it wasn't necessary. Just because you didn't feel pain didn't mean you were reckless. You tried not to put yourself in excessive danger, realizing that even in Hell you could die

You didn't know how long you would be in Hell and whether it was possible to leave Hell at all, but while you were there you weren't going to let yourself die again, especially because you didn't notice any wound and Lucifer didn't mind helping you with it

🎪 Fizzarolli x Reader x Asmodeus 💕

In your relationship, Asmodeus has always tried to take care of Fizzarolli and you. He had sincere feelings for both of you, and you responded in kind, but if Fizzarolli really tried to be careful, then you got into trouble more often. They both saw the wounds healing on you, but you always said it was just a small accident and they had nothing to worry about. This went on until you returned with bloodstains on your clothes and serious wounds that you didn't pay attention to

They immediately rushed to you, both very worried. You convinced them that you were fine, but this time it was obviously not the case. Asmodeus treated your wounds, after which he seriously asked who did it. To his question, you smiled gently and said that they were much worse off than you, so you shouldn't have worried about it. However, there was something that did not escape their eyes. It's like you didn't feel the touch of your wounds

When Fizzarolli asked you if you were in pain, you were confused and said that you didn't feel any pain at all. You've had CIP and you've never felt pain in your entire life. There used to be problems because of this, but now you have learned to avoid serious problems, at least you tried

Asmodeus and Fizzarolli weren't going to leave you alone until your wounds were completely healed. They both surrounded you with care, worrying about you, to which you laughed softly and hugged them. Even in Hell, you were able to find those who gave you the warmth that warmed your heart and soul

[sparklecareforrealjustice]

what are some problematic elements of v4 again?

here's a list of not great things in no particular order. not adding pictures because this post is already long enough as is, but go and reread the volume and you'll see what i mean.

v4 ended on march 30 2024, and the new v5 sparklecare ref sheets started to drop march 12 2024. kittycorn is suddenly able to draw barry fat again out of nowhere after not doing so since around the start of v3. it would've been nice if squeak drew him fat in the actual volume that was releasing at the time. here's a link to an ask i got that clarifies the dates/posting schedule of the comic.

uni being annoyed by barry and making fun of him, but only three pages later she gets frustrated at cyn for making fun of barry. sure, there's a timeskip, but... consistency, much?

the scene after cuddles berating uni could have been impactful if we weren't told constantly by kittycorn that this volume doesn't have any gore or violence in it (and if you didn't hear about it from squeak, the volume's cover says it as well). i understand needing warnings for things, but it's a warning for something that... doesn't happen? all of the tension from that scene - the question of whether uni did something or not, considering the large amount blood on the floor - is made completely pointless. the comic wants to act like there's an important moment happening, but at the same time, the comic itself made the moment boring because it told you there was nothing to worry about beforehand.

on the same note of cuddles berating uni - it's not executed well. his point about it not being the same type of puppet is... correct. sure, he's being a dick to uni and uni only, but his design mirrors uni. there's clearly something going on there. it's so obviously being written as a mouthpiece for kittycorn to state squeaks feelings. which is fine, it's squeaks comic, but it isn't written well. "people don't like my art, why are they attacking me :(" because people are allowed to have opinions about the main writer and artist of the comic they like, maybe? having the comic people are reading change all of a sudden to only comfort versus the commentary on the medical system and trauma that it was originally stated to be is going to make some people upset!

carrie is a dick to mood for basically no reason. uni locks herself in her room, carrie and barry can't get it open, so mood uses her keys to open it. cool! and then mood offers to clean kneevil instead of just throwing him away (as we're shown they have to do to comfort objects in v2). so then why does carrie make a slight at mood about her job to her? mood is a nurse, isn't she? so she's not even harming the patients! even if it's carrie taking out her anger about doom to his sister instead, it's still a weird moment to do it -- right after mood did nothing but help them.

"Why don't you go back and do something with your magic, dude? That's a talent you have, you're good at it."

"...I don't wanna freak out Barry any more though, bro... my magic stresses him out..."

"...you can do something with your magic, even if it confuses me, I'll be fine. If it would make you happy, do anything you want."

barry shouldn't have to sacrifice his own comfort and put aside his own feelings in order to make uni happy. also, when being yelled at by carrie, barry just says and accepts he's a jerk instead of defending himself? because the only reason he's being a dick to uni in the first place is because uni was a dick to him first (making fun of barry after he tried apologizing for something, which has been stated in the past to be hard for him). he was made fun of after being vulnerable, of course he's going to be a jerk to uni! but no, now he's completely in the wrong and uni is perfect and good in every way and did nothing wrong just because she's sad? that's not how that works! if uni (and carrie to a lesser extent) keep riling barry up, of course he's going to snap and act like a dick! why are they surprised that annoying somebody makes them act shitty to you due to them finding you annoying? you can't be intentionally annoying someone and expect there to be no consequences, or be mad/weirded out when there are consequences!

mood is scared by kneevil with the giant butterfly despite kittycorn stating that bugs are the only thing that mood and doom eat, and that them only eating bugs is supposed to be an attempt at writing an eating disorder. it's brushed off later with mood saying "nah. it didn't scare me that bad.", despite her being visibly uncomfortable a few pages earlier.

uni using her stupid perfect vision goggles to sew the puppets in this volume instead of kittycorn having to write squeaks blind character as actually blind. uni isn't supposed to have scissors or needles in the first place due to her being a self harm risk, so sure, the staff probably wouldn't help her with making puppets. but she could ask barry or carrie! maybe even jay! or any other friends she might have, considering she's spent nine years at the hospital!

barry should not be cool with barrific existing. it's been made a point throughout the comic that he hates and is distressed by magic due to it triggering his schizophrenia -- why would he be cool with seeing a puppet based on himself that's made alive due to magic? yes, i get that it's the famous barry puppet comic joke, but barry should be upset about this, not just shocked for a single panel and then completely fine with seeing magical sentient/sapient puppets the rest of the volume. barry should be panicking and hiding from all these shenanigans, or be mad, or something other than completely fine with it.

kneevil is able to trap barrific and barry in a cage... so why hasn't uni used her magic to stop cuddles in literally any way? i talk about this in more detail here.

the entire ending. or, more specifically, right before the ending, with kneevil crying and barrific apologizing. uni/kneevil is able to treat her/his friends like shit and don't get any sort of consequences for it. i go into more depth here about it (because trust me, it is written bad).

why are the sex jokes so constant? everyone has already said there's too many sex jokes already but sometimes less really is more. there should've been less.

-mod polly 🧊

[mysadcorner]

Hello! Just wanted to start by saying thanks for your amazing writing and sharing with all of us! If it’s not too much trouble, could I request headcanons for Jason Todd with a significant other who has chronic pain? Personally I’ve got endometriosis (it’s a rude little thing) and that causes quite bad pain, so I’m being a bit self indulgent here. Thank you very much if you manage to get around to it! ♥️

Jason Todd x ChronicPain!Reader Headcanons

-Credit to the gifs owner - Please be specific about characters wanted in headcanons -

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I personally suffer from CFS/ME which also comes with frequent pain all across my body (as well as many other symptoms) so it was nice to get a request like this. Thank you! :)

Jason's first reaction to you having chronic pain would be instant sympathy, but he wouldn't want you to think that he feels any less of you. Jason just wants you to know that he wants to help as best as he can while also feeling bad about the situation you're in but can't change.

He would do his best to try to figure out what you need, whether that be lifestyle changes that you may need help with or just simple things that you go through everyday. He doesn't mind helping you out and will be more than happy to provide the things you need once he's figured out what would help you best.

He would also accommodate to you through things in his own life just because he cares about you so much, and he'd never want you to feel bad about these changes as he's doing them willingly. He would even change his schedule around completely for you if you needed it, just so that he can be with you during specific times that your chronic pain may take place, or need help getting places due to the pain causing you issues.

Jason and his family know a lot of people, especially those who are well qualified. Because of this he'll go out of his way to ask around as to what may help you even more, or asking about certain methods that could make things easier for you, and he'd prefer to do this than just listen to your doctor without looking any further for information as even he knows that a single doctor can be dismissive over problems or simply wrong about things a lot of the time.

If your chronic pain was impacting you a lot more than usual he'll take some time or even a few weeks off from his everyday activities so that he can look after you full-time until you're able to do some things on your own again, although he may need to leave during the night so that he can continue protecting Gotham. He doesn't mind doing this and would prefer if you're honest about when you're struggling so that he can make sure you're as well as you can be in the long-term.

If you're ever feeling anxious, or just simply want company, to appointments, then Jason will go with you and will be more than happy to do so. Not only does this make you both feel better about whatever nerves you're having, but seeing how your appointments go gives him a better idea of how your condition works and affects you in depth which then enables him to aid you better or give you reassurance about certain things.

Jason is distraught on the inside when he sees you suffering from your chronic pain, but he'll try his best to not let you see. He'll spend his time trying to look strong for you so that neither of you get emotional about it and you continue to feel supported by him. He will open up to you about how he was feeling in that moment a while later once the pain has decreased (if it does) so that he's still being honest with you but strong in the moments you really need him.

Constantly being stocked up so he can look after you - Jason is constantly checking how stocked up he is on pain medication for you, mainly since he regularly buys some for himself just in case he's ever injured while out as Red Hood. This makes things a lot easier for you since they're always ready to be used and you don't need to worry about not being able to go out and get it for yourself when you're pain is severe. Plus, this makes him calmer knowing that if he's ever not there you have something to minimise the pain by yourself rather than suffering until he's able to help if you feel comfortable letting him.

[nsfwdxddy]

A Night of Love

He remembered every moment of his marriage in vivid detail. The moment he saw her walk down the aisle, the moment they exchanged rings, the moment the priest uttered the phrase, "The groom may now kiss the bride."

He could recall how supple and soft her lips were. He felt a strong wave of passion wash over him ever since that moment as his hands firmly rested on her hips, as he deepened the kiss of authority. But what seemed to have been a perfect wedding, didn't end with the couple consummating their love in the bedroom.

It was largely due to her insecurity regarding her body. He had noticed her, even before the marriage, checking herself out in the mirror with a sad look on her face. She would often ask him, "Would you marry me with me looking like this?" and every time his answer would be the same. The marriage itself didn't help in reducing her insecurity.

Months passed without any activity in the bedroom, owing to busy schedules in the lives of both parties involved. He couldn't stop thinking about ways of fucking her hard into the mattress, and she was constantly worried about her insecurity to please him.

It was another normal day at his office, when the topic of discussion with his colleagues turned into his marriage.

"You guys haven't .. um you know ..," said one of them, tiptoeing his way to ask a personal question.

"No," he said looking down, his expression going immediately sour. "Every time I bring it up, she changes the topic. And I don't blame her. But her looks do not bother me, and I'm not able to convince her of that."

"I have an idea," interjected a female colleague. "Be a bit forceful. With consent of course. Buy her a set of lingerie and command that you want to see her in it. Keep talking her into it with a strong conviction until she gives in. And she is all yours. But remember, consent and boundaries are important."

Feeling motivated, he went to the local undergarment store and brought a black push-up bra, a garter belt, a pair of stockings with in-built suspenders to go along with the garter belt. He was thoughtful at the moment to buy something to her body shape that would compliment her nicely.

"Baby, I'm home," he called out to her as he entered the home. "I have a surprise for you."

"What is it?" she asked out of curiosity.

He slowly went around her back and put his hands around her eyes and led her into the bedroom. "You will see soon enough," he said.

He made her stand eyes closed until he placed the gift he got for her on the bed. "You can open them now," he said in excitement.

Once she opened her eyes, the curiosity she once had turned into one of pure horror. "I can't wear that. Are you trying to mock me?" she said, sounding angrily.

"I - I insist that you put it on," he suggested, trying to put on the 'dominant' face his colleague had mentioned. "And no baby, of course not. I genuinely believe you are so beautiful just the way you are. Just believe in yourself. I married you didn't I?"

Hearing him say that, she felt confident as well. Hiding a small blush in her smile, he ushered him out of the room, so that she can truly start to please him, which she has longed for since the marriage.

She tried it and immediately fell in love with it. She was astonished as to how well it fit her, her assets felt gorgeous and she felt confident in her own body. Tears gently rolled down her eyes, as she now felt differently about her insecurity. She understood that insecurities are subjective and that to be happy, insecurities shouldn't come in the way.

She made her way back to the door, upholding a new found sexiness in herself. She opened the door, leaning to one side of it and flaunting her body to her dear husband, who was seeing her with pure passion and lust in his eyes. She pointed a finger at him and motioned for him to come closer, which he did in an instant.

He closed the door after himself, immediately closing the gap between him and his wife, and melted into a deep kiss. It made him remember the same kiss he had at their wedding, which was lost on him these past few months. He released his inner beast, showing her his dominant side, which had been dormant.

As he painfully broke away from the kiss, his eyes reflected that of a lion who had its eyes locked on the prey and ready to pounce. He just looked at her and whispered "Spread" into her ear, which led to her sprawling herself across the bed and spread her thick thighs for him.

He leaned forward to give her a gentle kiss and traced her body with kisses that left her needing for more, and moans escaped her soul with each kiss across her burning body. He would finally set his eyes on the prize, which had already soaked the new panties he brought for her. He slowly slid it to one side, and proceeded to slurp the wetness of her pussy with his tongue. He would also spit on his fingers and gently apply it to the sides and inside of the pussy, penetrating it gently, to prime her pussy for the inevitable.

The passion was getting to him, as he got on top of her and this time he decided to give her some marks that would make her remember this night and never think low of herself. He then unhooked her bra, which exposed her big, juicy breasts which he immediately pounced on, sucking on her nipples and pulling it back just a bit to illicit a moan from her.

She was already starting to feel overstimulated as it was the first time anyone had made her body this hot and someone was being rough with her. Even the slightest touch sent her into a frenzy which she couldn't quite comprehend. In another bout of passion, she said "Let me take care of you now," and the roles were reversed.

She was on top of him now, unbuckling the belt and pulling down the pant and underwear which separated his big cock from her eyes. Upon perching her eyes, she immediately gripped it firmly in her eyes, gazing into it with such admiration and teased it with a gentle lick and looked into his eyes. "I saw some videos where I learnt how to do this," she said and sunk her face down the length of his cock, warming it up inside her mouth and stimulating it with her tongue. He was clutching the sheets in pure ecstasy as he didn't know that she could do something like this to him. It would heighten his senses the moment she started bobbing her head up and down to take as much of his cock down her small little throat. She would gag and gasp for breath in short spans before trying again, just more faster this time.

He felt the control slipping away from him if she continued to suck his cock like she was, so he switched up the roles and took control once again. "On all fours," he instructed her and got behind her and this was the moment, he decided to rock her entire world.

"Are you ready for this, baby? I'm gonna fuck you so hard. I need you to be pretty little doll and take me good."

She shut her mouth and nodded slowly to give him the approval he needed. He positioned his cock next to her entrance, and with a gentle heave, thrust it inside her cervix, causing her to jump and curl a bit forward, her stomach forming ripples from her loose skin.

He felt the thickness of her pussy, slowly moving it inside of her, picking up the pace little by little, making sure she was ok with how fast he was going. She obeyed him to the last word, taking his cock really well so deep into her womb. He was edging closer and closer to his orgasm every time he pulled out and thrust again.

With one final thrust, all the pent up cum that had accumulated in the tip had emptied into her womb, causing her to scream in ecstasy. He then repeated the same as she was now used to how it felt inside.

He came a total of 5 times inside her, with so much cum that leaked out of her pussy. He tried to push some of the cum back inside but when it was not possible, he switched to another hole, and came some more into her mouth, leaving her covered, head to toe in his cum.

After that followed the most intimate part of the relationship, the aftercare. He pampered her with so many kisses and helped clean up all the cum he had rewarded her with. He set up the hot tub for her to relax, even helping massage her hair and tell her about how well she was. He gave her some chocolates and reassured her that he was always going to be by her side at all times. He gave her a fresh set of clothes and went to sleep cuddled up in each other's arms as they reminisced about their first fuck, sharing stories of each thing felt, eventually falling asleep.

[horce-divorce]

Going to Pride today which is always exciting, but I can't even do that without being constantly reminded that I am Othered by being homeless... have lost all of my cute Pride outfits, even my holo fanny pack that I was so sure I brought with me, and the shoes that matched. my friend is performing, but they're an old friend from a job- if I talk to them and we play catch-up, will they judge me? And of course, it's a corporate-sponsored, city Pride event, so it's all vendors all day, but we have $7.66 in the paypal and Bel's birthday is Tuesday and all I want is to be able to take him out to dinner so I was already planning on not buying anything.

Now that we're in a city (and a progressive one) I keep spotting places that make me go "🥺 maybe I could go back to work just a little bit...." indie bookstores and coffee shops and the dispensary in an old church where the queer budtender helped us out... But I can't do that, though, and I know I can't. But I'm also terrified now because I have a disabled friend who knows better than my family members how things work for the disabled, and she pointed out that disability lawyers only take cases they can win. That's why they can wait to get paid when you do.

And tbqfh I'm not entirely sure that describes my case. I havent worked in over 10 years and I'm pretty sure I did rack up the necessary work credits for when I became disabled- but I wouldn't apply for Disability for 10 more years because I didn't have a diagnosis yet. So now I'm worried they're going to see the onset of my disability as being at age 31, when I applied, a full 10 years after it truly started, in which case I'd need to have more work credits to even qualify and I'd HAVE to go back to work before I reapply anyway.

But like. I actually can't do that, though. I am my own full time carer, and Bellamy's. I need to be able to change my schedule at the drop of a hat. I need to be able to take a break and lie on the floor if I'm about to pass out. I need to be with Bellamy, because his symptoms can also change at the drop of a hat, and he needs me to be around if anything happens because I am his only trusted person around who knows anything about his condition.

Hence why i have been freelancing up until lately.... I suppose there's probably a better chance of me finding a regular freelance transcript gig around here. And I am still thinking about tattoo stuff... idk that's. A Lot more competitive, and it's not like I have the money to just be hanging around tattoo shops as a customer rn lmao... 10 or so years ago that was how you got a foot in the door, if you were lucky. Idk how it is now. I know some people run tattoo schools but lmao fuck that. I'm already in debt I don't need more of that shit.

Ugghbh idk. It sucks being poor but being homeless and unemployed even makes other poor people look at me sideways and I hate this shit.

Anyway. We are going to Pride, and we will have a nice time in each other's company regardless, and we always find a way to have fun without buying stuff. Theres not having Enough money for everything, and then there's not having money for 1 of those things, and when you finally do, you have to choose which necessity you need the most and spend the money on that, and everything else has to wait. Even food. Even medicine. Even birthdays.

[dracothedeatheatingcupcake-ao3]

Hey sorry if this is weird but are you doing okay? I hope ur day is nice and ur super cool and write great fanfics!

Hi! No, it's not weird at all, ha. Thanks for checking in! And I'm glad you like my fics!! :-D

(Warning, mini rant up ahead. It's about things that happened months ago, but still. Warning. It also gets a bit long and heavy in places, since this is a bit of a loaded question for me these days, ha.

Also, I'm putting a read more, since this OF COURSE got way too long 😅)

Before the read more, though, I just wanted to say that tomorrow is my birthday and I'm turning 26, which is both terrifying and exciting! :-D Also I like colors. :-)

Now, to answer the question... ehhh. It's complicated. If you'd asked me this back in October/November, my answer would have been a very firm "NO." I was... not doing good back then. It was a mix of things, like an upcoming internship I was terrified of, and my half done thesis that I was constantly putting off, but mainly it was an absolutely TERRIBLE sub supervisor at work who kept changing our schedule then getting mad at me when I didn't know what was going on and got stressed out at the change (since I'm the kind of person who needs a schedule or I flounder). For example, she always wanted us to prep snack for the kids before the program started (I'm an after school teacher), but she wouldn't buy the snack until the day of, and then she'd be late, getting there maybe 5 minutes before program started, which is when I needed to be in my classroom, since I was by myself with like... 20 1st-5th graders. She straight up hurled abuse at me and my coworker because of it. She also got mad at me when I refused to do things that would put myself or the kids in danger, such as leaving me alone with 30+ UTK (preschool)-5th grade students running around a field that was 5 minutes from our usual classroom and at least 2 minutes away from the next adult, all while I was recording the laps they were all running, something that was already a challenge with two people and that I struggled with doing in a good day since I'm an awful multi-tasker.

Now, one thing to note about me is that I take great pride in my work. I've worked with kids for over 5 years now, and have been in a graduate program to become a school counselor for almost 3 years. I KNOW how to be around kids. I am very competent at my job and the kids all respect me (I hope) and I care very, very deeply for all the kids, especially the "older" kids I work with. But I legit wanted to quit multiple times during the 3 months she was my supervisor. If I didn't know she was only a sub, I would have. My coworker did, and while the supervisor wasn't the only reason, it was part of it. I had 2 panic attacks at work alone, struggling not to cry in front of the children, which I never want to do because I don't want to worry them. And of course the supervisor got mad that I had my coworker get the kindergarteners (which, by the by, IS NOT SUPPOSED TO BE MY JOB SINCE I WORK WITH THE OLDER STUDENTS, but she forced me to do it anyway, making me late starting in my classroom, which stressed me out more) during one of my panic attacks. Oh, and she also made me walk to the front of the school to pick up kindergarteners (which is a long walk from our classrooms) despite me saying that I had SEVERELY hurt my foot and that walking on it hurt. And she claimed I didn't do my work, despite the fact that I was the only one who was doing my job, it was her who wasn't, which made me unable to do mine.

So... yeah. The beginning of the school year last year was awful, but it got really bad in October, when my coworker quit and I was left alone with this supervisor for a month and a half. And if anyone is curious, I did actually complain to her supervisor after she made me walk on my injured foot and said I "wasn't doing my job" JUST BECAUSE I COULDN'T WALK, EVEN THOUGH I OFFERED TO PICK UP THE UTK STUDENTS INSTEAD. But while her supervisor was very apologetic while I was talking to her, literally nothing happened. Not even an apology. And I'm still working with this woman, though she's not my supervisor anymore. She's the assistant supervisor, but she's been subbing at other schools recently, so I've not had to see her much. Ironically, when she is around, I get along fine with her. That's one of the reasons those several months hurt so much; we were kind of friends beforehand. And we're kind of friends again. I've never been one to hold grudges, luckily. But that doesn't make it hurt less. Obviously, since it's still bothering me several months later. (Oh, and side note, but this supervisor was in her mid to late 30's. So, it's not like she's young and didn't know better.)

But that was months ago. And once my usual supervisor came back (who I'm also friendly with, and who is FAR more competent than the sub) things got a lot easier. I still have my internship to worry about, which is it's own brand of stress, but things have calmed down a lot since then. Not as good as it was before, but... I'm getting there. Oh! Another thing that helped was that I finally finished my final project/thesis, which had been a source of stress for months, since I was almost 6 months late to starting and even more to finishing the project, the whole thing with my sub supervisor making it all worse. But I finished it and turned it in last month, and my professor said I did really well and that I should be proud. I was terrified it was awful since I struggled so hard, and it was so relieving to know that it was good and that I'm done.

Also! Like I said earlier, it's my birthday tomorrow! I'm turning 26, which is... a weird number. Far more than I ever expected. Not because I thought I'd die, no. But just... I never really thought this far ahead as a teen, you know? I was so focused on getting through college, and then grad school, that the passage of time kind of got all wonky. I'm also a little nervous, since my last two birthdays have... sucked. A lot. Last year my dad's appendix burst right after my birthday dinner and he spent several hours in the hospital waiting area, none of us knowing what was wrong with him. And then, after we learned what was wrong, we were worried he would die from sepsis or a complication with the surgery, since my dad is a larger man and is not the healthiest. And the year before we learned we had mold in the wall between my and my brother's bedroom, so we'd have to move out a week later for at least 3 weeks while they fixed it. Which was terrifying, since the reason we had to leave our old apartment was because of mold. They sprayed some mold killer that my mom was horribly allergic to, so we had to move abruptly, and we were all terrified we'd have to abruptly move in the middle of the year, when rent everywhere in my area is stupidly high. We have a good rate where we currently are, since we've lived here 15 years, but anywhere else...? Yeah.

This ended up longer than intended... but I think anyone who follows me here knows to expect that when asking me a simple question by now, ha. Ultimately I'm doing... alright. Not great, not terrible, but... okay. Basically, I was treading water before, but now I'm holding onto a life preserver, if that makes sense. Out of immediate danger, but at risk of falling if things get worse again.

If all goes well, though, I will be done with my grad program by April, and then I will be going on a sort of graduation cruise with my parents during Spring Break, then in May I'm going to Japan with my brother, as a dual graduation, 30th birthday celebration for him (his birthday is March 10th, but he didn't want to go to Japan in March since the weather isn't great. And he didn't want to go in April because it's busy with Golden Week and cherry blossom season). I've been actually planning and budgeting this trip, which is exciting, since I have a lot of cool things planned and I really hope the trip goes as well as I'm hoping it will. I also hope I might be able to find some Danganronpa things while there, since it is more popular in Japan, I think? Not sure if there will be merch for it, since it is older, and I honestly don't know if it was that big in Japan, but I can hope, ha. I'm also excited for all the Nintendo and Pokémon things, since I love Nintendo and Pokémon.

Now, I should end this here or I'll be talking all day, ha. Sorry for the wall of text, but I've not really spoken about any of this on here, since it was just... not easy. But it's getting better. And the fact I'm writing again showcases that. I'm more than halfway done with my next chapter of my Bowuigi fic, Luigi and the Beast, which I feared I was done with for good. I don't know if I'll keep writing after this chapter, but writing anything after months of anxiety and writer's block is amazing.

Finally... thanks for checking in. And I'm glad you like my fics! If it isn't obvious by now, I have a lot of anxiety surrounding my writing, so I'm really glad that people do enjoy it. ^-^

[sapphos-darlings]

I recently found out that I have severe commitment issues, which I personally believe comes from trauma and I would love to date women in the future, yet I don't know how to combat my commitment issues : /

Hello, Anon!

Well, recognizing and admitting you have an issue is the first step, so there's that. If you have serious trauma and it's making your life difficult, consider contacting a mental health professional.

Commitment issues are very common, and I don't think it's unreasonable to feel intimidated by big changes and responsibilities in life. I admit I share some of that too, and I've discussed this with a bi friend of mine who has anxiety. In short both of us have a tendency to freak out when we click with a woman, because either we will end up broken-hearted, or be together forever, and both are terrifying things.

I don't really have all the answers here, but I think just generally starting to work on your trauma and your issues will eventually ripple all over your life. Finding out where the root of the issue is leads to insight and demystification of the problem, and there you can start the change and learning new, better habits and attitudes.

An immediate thing you can learn here is that your commitment issues aren't the end of the world or some big, horrible flaw that makes you unfit to date. Everyone has their own issues and baggage as well, so it's not like you're worse off there. Sometimes working on your fears and insecurities means facing them and doing things despite them.

It's important to be open about them to the women you date. Don't rush yourself into commitments you are not ready yet, don't fake trust, and don't lie about your feelings. Forcing yourself is a sure way to self-sabotage and ruin your own growth and chances.

Practice both comitting to routines and people while tolerating your own fear. You commit to schedules, pets, and promises with friends. Try making new friends or try a new hobby. Start learning something difficult. Evaluate honestly where you succeed and where you have challenges.

Start listening to yourself more and learning about your issues. Listen to yourself, be gentle and understanding, and let the change start from within. Set realistic goals, such as "I will understand what my feelings are and what they want", "I will learn my triggers", and "I will learn to sit with my discomfort". Remember to be patient with yourself!

This will lead to you starting to see what is realistic and what is your fears speaking. Like, maybe take a chance on a date with a nice woman without worrying what divorce lawyers will cost 20 years from now. Or imagening your wedding (I do this. It's not good, tbh). Learn to be in the moment and open to the new person as she is, not how your mind is presenting her.

Just wait and see, give reality a chance. Running away might protect you in some cases, but it will also stop good things from coming into your life. You're constantly going towards the future anyway, might as well give good changes a chance on the way.

I hope you find something helpful in this! If not anything else, I hear you. You have already indentified the issue, so just keep up whatever you're doing, you'll keep growing!

-Lavender

[taigaoftundrablog]

I'm afraid this isn't a weekly blog anymore, but here's something to make up for it

Experiment on phone usage starring myself

The main goal here is to:

1. Reduce my phone usage

2. See how your phone affects your life

Day 1

it's a tuesday. i have decided to go a decent portion of my day without my phone. i did not touch my phone during school, but after it, usage was pretty much average. i have not touched discord for the entire day, and i don't seem to be getting any notifications from there. hopefully i can lessen usage tomorrow, as i did use my phone quite a lot, still.

i did notice how not using my phone affected me though. for example, i was out of things to do for most of the breaks, since everyone else is stuck looking at their phones constantly. i'm marking this as a decent start.

Day 1 usage: 3h 30min

Most used app: Google (i look through the news feed a lot, it's a bad habit, but I will hopefully be looking at it a lot less by the end of this study/experiment.)

Time I went to bed: 21.30

Day 2: Plans

it's not wednesday yet, but my plans are:

- try get phone usage down to 3 hours

- start working on something, which i might find productive

- don't check discord, as not doing so will show myself that i'm actually determined about this

hopefully i fill my expectations of myself tomorrow.

Day 2

now it's wednesday, just got out of school. it's 14.26 right now and i have around 45 minutes of phone usage right now after allowing myself to use my phone normally school. 45min is about average for me and most of that time is used on school related stuff (checking schedule, etc.). i got out of school a few hours later yesterday so we'll see how today goes at home. have not touched discord, don't know how people there are doing, as the app quite literally is not giving me any notifications right now.

22.08. i am about to go to bed. i've spent most of my day playing on switch, which i feel like is more productive than being on my phone all day. first discord notifications popped up, apparently people are hoping i'm alright. it's nice to know that people care about how i'm doing but i have still yet to open discord. honestly opening it up seems worse than not doing so, so i may delay that to tomorrow evening, where i'll have something to talk about (nintendo direct).

Phone usage: 2h 18m (I really overdid myself there.)

Most used app: Chrome (I looked at random stuff online, Nintendo and school related)

Time I went to bed: 22.16

Day 3: Plans

plans for day 3 are: keep phone usage around the same, try not to go above 3 hours if plausible (opening discord for the first time in 4 days may change that to be over 3h though), and to stay focused on schoolwork. i'm honestly seeing some improvement, although not too much.

Day 3

literally just woke up. it's 6.09. i'm pretty intrigued to see how this day goes as i'll most likely be opening discord for the first time in a while.

welp, can say that people were worried about me. i do feel like i should've notified them about that before as uh they thought i pretty much died. whoops.

it's pretty late, and from what i've noticed, discord is the main reason i go to bed late and use my phone so much. not much else to note for today.

Phone usage: 3h 38min

Most used app: Geometry Dash (The game's just fun, alright?)

Time I went to sleep: 21.59

Stuff about day 4 & 5

have to preface these days a bit, as i did not initially write anything for these days, so i'm writing them on monday. main reason: i was too busy spending time doing other things + i did not feel like it. i'm currently thinking why i just stopped for two days, but i believe it's due to a lack of motivation/willingness, which i've seen a lot in myself. could honestly be due to improper phone usage, which was the main thing i need to work on here.

i've got to fix this somehow.

Day 4

pretty much spent all day at home playing on switch and whatever.

Phone usage: 3h 6min

Most used app: Discord (i KNEW this was gonna happen)

Time I went to sleep: presumably around 23.00

Day 5

same thing as yesterday, but we went to the store etc.

got new shoes, it'll take some time to get used to these but they're nice so far.

Phone usage: 2h 46min

Most used app: Discord (I'm genuinely addicted to human interaction, could be worse though of course (ahem TikTok, thank god I don't use that app))

Time I went to sleep: around 22.00

Day 6

start of a brand new week, it's monday now, i am currently at school, maybe i'll try reading this dang book in the evening as i got an assignment to read it, have to be done on thursday and this has like 250 pages. i will promise to you that i'll have less than an hour tomorrow, if i fail, i will draw something daily for a month AND it won't be myself constantly.

it's 22.02. sitting in bed, have done absolutely nothing productive today. have not touched that book which i have to read in like 3 days. guys i am so mentally stable and motivated

anyway yeah tomorrow is the sub-hour phone usage day which only means that i should probably be sleeping soon. i'ma actually get started on that book

Phone usage: 5h 31min (Mostly due to me also drawing for a decent while, 1h 21min to be exact.)

Most used app: Discord (Who would've thought?)

Time I went to sleep: around 23.00

Day 7

last day, i have like 15 minutes to write this

i have officially passed the test of less than an hour of phone usage and i am pretty proud of that. i've read the book i was meant to read a decent lot, at page 75 or something now. very cool.

not using my phone much does feel very odd honestly, but it feels kinda freeing in a way too, since i'm not stuck to this screen for 4 hours a day. i will do the final thoughts section tomorrow.

Phone usage: 48min

Most used app: Notes (Diary thing about this book which I have to write)

Time I went to sleep: 21.55, goodnight everyone

Closing thoughts (very cool)

i am finally free

phone usage has dipped a decent bit i would say, as it previously was up to 5 hours some days, now it seems to be at around 3 hours a day. there are of course exceptions, though, but i accept them

well, i shouldn't say free but still

pretty interesting how that week went. i believe my main lesson here is that you pretty much can't get rid of your phone in your life no matter how much you want to, since actually important things are sort of mixed up with less important ones.

i believe i have succeeded at this odd test somewhat

feels like i've been focusing more properly on the things i actually need to focus on, which is good for a change.

will see you all at some point, i'll try next week maybe!

[keefwho]

August 29 - 2023 Tuesday

7:23 AM

The past few days have been good. On Friday my bestie held her birthday party which went super well on my end. Some of her friends didn't show up which was a bummer but we got a good amount of people to come party and I personally did the best I could to contribute.

The weekend was fine. I was fairly productive finishing up my latest VRchat world and Sunday was chill.

Yesterday went okay too. I got everything done aside from my workout because my tummy was in a phase of sorts.

11:45 AM Thoughts

I feel bad and weird, I didn't stick to my schedule today. I was just so sleepy and felt lazy. I don't know why. Right now I have no direction. I'm trying to stick to something to do so I can feel like I did anything today. I'm so caught up in my thoughts, focusing is hard. I'm going to shave today so that should be nice. I have to do today's request too. Maybe I can focus enough to work on one of the gifts I wanna get done for a few friends. I might not though. I've been forgetting to write down my thoughts but thats what I'm doing now. In a new way. It gets tiresome to frame everything like "I'm having the thought that." It's important to recognize thoughts that way though. I think changing the font on these rants is enough for me. Its something else. These thoughts are like radio broadcasts in my brain that are unfiltered and happening constantly.

3:15 PM Thoughts

I feel so disconnected from everything. Its days like this where I don't want to do anything, I don't feel anything, and I start to worry about it. Even the things that are important to me seem so distant. I worry that I am the problem, that there is something deeply wrong with me that will win in the end. I worry that anything I do now is irrelevant or misguided because I feel like I'm on autopilot. It's like I'm not real or I don't matter. Like I'm an NPC in someone else's game.

[animeomegas]

Hi!!!, first, congratulations on 1000 followers!I wanted to ask you something, could you make a list of omegas that would have worse self esteem during pregnancy.if you can't don't worry, have a nice day and again congratulations.

(Hey, thank you so much for your congratulations!! Hmm, I’m sure I can make a little list~)

Warnings: Insecurities of all sorts, mentions of sex.

Insecure over appearance:

· Itachi – Itachi is worried about how skinny and sickly he is. He’s always been on the small side but pregnancy has stopped him being able to keep much food down, and so he just kept getting smaller and smaller. It’s a small insecurity at first, but he does find himself staring at his reflection and wondering if his mate finds him attractive. Itachi goes a long while without sex because of how sick he gets during pregnancy and after birth, and that feeds the insecurity that his alpha doesn’t find him attractive.

· Tamaki – He’s completely fine until he gets lost in a rabbit hole on some parenting and omega focused forums. He finds all these posts from other omegas about how their alphas don’t find them attractive anymore, and about how they’ve stopped having sex. Now, Tamaki is extremely sexually needy during his pregnancy, so he’s suddenly paralysed with fear. Has his alpha been forcing themselves this whole time? Have they just been doing it to please him without enjoying it themselves? He cries about it quite a bit until his alpha finds out and knocks a little bit of sense into him.

· Asmo – Asmo puts so much effort into his physical appearance. He’s very proud of it and he’s very reliant on his appearance to carry his self-esteem. So, a drastic change of any sort would be extremely distressing. He buys every cream and treatment imaginable to stop stretch marks, and acne etc. but things still change with his body. And because Asmo views his worth through looks, he assumes that his alpha does also. He tries to hide, to turn down sex, but of course, this alerts his alpha immediately to the fact that something is wrong. He never really gets over the insecurities while he’s still pregnant, but his alpha can minimise the effects with copious love and praise.

· Julian – He’s extremely insecure as it is, constantly questioning why his alpha finds him attractive at all but being pregnant adds enough layer on to the pre-existing insecurities. He always tries to reassure his alpha that they don’t have to touch him if they don’t want, that they should leave the room before he gets changed or when he’s bathing because they probably don’t want to see him like that. His insecurities run very deeply, just like Asmo’s, so they can’t be fixed, but they can be helped with lots of comfort and reassurance.

Insecure over abilities (e.g., being weak physically etc.):

· Sasuke – The fact that he can’t go on missions or train pisses him off. And as the months go by, he’s gaining weight and losing muscle definition and it freaks him out because he feels like he’s losing who he is which drops his self-esteem. Training has been a part of his life for as long as he can remember. Just design some softer workout routines for him with a mednin and remind him that he can still practice throwing kunai before he loses his goddamn mind.

· Bakugou – The physical condition of his body changing isn’t that big of a deal for him. He has a very small tummy, especially considering he’s pregnant with twins, and he knows he can bounce back after the birth because he’s super dedicated to his physical routine. What he’s not so confident about is the slipping control he has over his quirk. He has (had) an iron clad control, and the random explosions while pregnant are so embarrassing. Not to mention the disruption that his quirk causes in his nest. He has to replace so many cushions which makes his instincts go wild because significant changes to an omega’s nest while pregnant is distressing. If his friends tease him about the loss of control, he gets genuinely mad about because it’s something of a sore spot.

· Jumin – Jumin tries to keep his life while pregnant as close to his life before being pregnant as possible and in many ways, he nails it. He buys copies of his favourite suits and has them tailored every other week to fit his growing stomach. He buys non-alcoholic wine and drinks it with a grimace. He schedules lots of massages to keep the aches and pains away, so he feels normal. But there is one thing that isn’t so easy to keep normal: his emotions. Now, this fits into this category rather than the one below because Jumin gets insecure about how his emotional control impacts his ability to work. His emotions had never impacted his career before, but now he can’t help but tear up when he gets overstressed, he can’t work long hours without getting lonely and wanting to go home, he can’t take business trips because he doesn’t want to leave his nest for too long. It makes him feel a little like he’s lost himself because these things are things he’s been doing with ease for his entire life. He’s quite irritated by it and it damages his self esteem somewhat.

Insecure emotionally (e.g., unsure about being a good parent etc.):

· Tamaki –Tamaki also makes it onto this category. His insecurities are very specific, but he worries about being a bad role model socially for his pup. If his alpha is very socially adept, I’m not sure he would worry as much, because he knows that his pup can learn from their other parent, but if Tamaki’s alpha is also a little shy or prefers not being around people, then he gets really worried about it. Him being so shy and anxious has really impacted his life and he really doesn’t want it to impact his pup in the same way. He really worries that he’ll be a bad influence in that regard. (but the prospect of an extremely extroverted child is an equally terrifying concept in a different way haha.)

· Lucifer – He is very worried about being a good parent because all he can focus on is the past times when he wasn’t a good older brother. I mean, Satan hates him, and that’s as close to a father/child bond that Lucifer has, so surely that must mean he’s not cut out to be a father? He’s not good at emotions or reasonable punishments or showing affection or… well, point is he doesn’t think he has what it takes to be a good parent, when all he’s ever had is a shitty father himself, and all he’s ever been, is a shitty older brother that drove his family apart.

· Levi – Levi is insecure about most things that have to do with himself, so it’s not surprising that he gets very insecure about being a good parent which drops his self-esteem to an all time low. He can’t even watch any anime that focuses too much on parent/child relationships because he can’t help but compare himself every time, and he works himself up into a mini panic. It’s difficult to calm Levi’s insecurities but his partner can help him somewhat.

· Hawks – Keigo is very insecure about his abilities to protect his pup. His has this conspiracy theory that the hero commission will try to kidnap his child. They were furious when they found out he was pregnant during the peak of his career and they pushed him heavily towards abortion. Keigo leaked the pregnancy news to the public to force the commission’s hands, but he’s still so paranoid that they’ll stage a 'tragic accident' for his pup to force him back into hero work, or try and kidnap and raise his pup as they raised him. He doesn’t have any proof, per se, but he’s terrified that he can’t protect his pup so he really doesn’t like to leave his alpha’s presence. When he’s close to his due date, he’s too insecure with all his conspiracy theories clouding his mind to even let his alpha shower by themselves.

· V – Jihyun sort of convinces himself that he’s cursed when it comes to looking after people (Rika, Saeyoung, Saeran), so he’s very upset by the prospect that he’ll probably fail at raising his child too. He originally says that he wants to give the pup up for adoption to save them, but eventually you talk him around and start working through his problems. He just doesn’t thing he’ll be a good role model. The longer he waits to have children after the more traumatic events of his life, the less these issues crop up.

Miscellaneous:

· Aizawa – Shouta gets insecure when people pay too much attention to him being pregnant. He doesn’t like people giving up their seats for him on public transport, he doesn’t like his students and colleagues asking invasive questions, he doesn’t like those awful shop attendants that try to shoehorn him into buying baby supplies he doesn’t need. He wishes people would just treat him normally. (and he absolutely starts to activate his quirk every time someone tries to touch his tummy without asking first.) But yeah, all the eyes and attention makes him super uncomfortable and it makes him overanalyse everything he does which does impact his self esteem.

· Light – Light has a very specific insecurities while pregnant which revolve around the fear that he’s lowering himself by carrying a pup. All his life he’s had people tell him that because he’s an omega, he should give up on all his dreams and have pups and stay home instead. It really doesn’t sit well with him that he’s doing what all those awful people told him to do (at least it feels that way to him). He feels ashamed and he hates it. He avoids everything stereotypical while pregnant. He’ll kick you in the face if you try to rub his feet, he does everything in his power to avoid giving in to cravings, and he doesn’t make a nest. It all takes a serious toll on his health but it would take one hell of a stubborn alpha to get him to bend on any of that. It puts a strain on the relationship.

[krakenartificer]

When I got my ADHD diagnosis, I looked at the questions on the screening form and thought, "If this result comes back positive, then I'm definitely not the only person in my family who has it." Questions like

"Have difficulty finishing one activity before starting another one" and

"I finish others' sentences before they can finish it themselves" and

"have trouble staying on one topic when talking"

...I thought were just weird quirks of my family, but no. When I got my results, I contacted my cousin, and she contacted her sisters and mother, and .. .. yeah. Basically everyone in my dad's side of the family is ADHD.

Now there are some problems with that, obviously, (getting family reunions to stick to a schedule is lol no) but there are some really fantastic perks. For one thing, no one in that family minds if I interrupt them while they're talking ... everyone's happy to keep 3 conversations going at the same time .... and no one minds if you fidget constantly.

But the best perk -- at least that I've found so far -- is that all of our parents have coping mechanisms, and passed them on to us. When I found myself unable to handle tasks with more than one step, my father didn't say "WTF are you talking about? It's easy! Just do the thing! Stop being lazy!" No, he could relate completely, and he sat down and taught me how to handle that.

So today, I'm going to pass on to you the coping mechanism my dad taught me for handling the "cannot put tasks in order / cannot get started / forget what I'm doing" problem. You'll need to adjust it for your own needs and your own struggles, but hopefully it'll be helpful in setting up your own process.

I'm going to walk through it with a big project I'm doing at work, just to have a concrete example. That will make some of the discussion specific to computer programming and technical writing, but I do the same thing for all my projects, so hopefully it'll be generalizable.

So to set the stage:

I was supposed to modify this piece of code -- we'll call it "Rosetta" -- to make it handle call data as well as what it was already doing. I did that.... but we now need the code to be able to handle calls (if that's wanted) but also to be able to handle NOT having calls (if THAT'S wanted).

Which is just .... ugh. So much. SOOOOOOOO much.

So. Break it down.

Step one is to get some recording mechanism - pen and paper, whiteboard, blank computer document, whatever

(Technically, this is a different coping strategy, so we'll just take a quick detour: WRITE THINGS DOWN. Your brain is shit at remembering things, and anyway you've already got limits on your working memory; why would you choose to tie up some of that limited resource in something that could be accomplished with literal stone-age technology? Don't even try to remember things. WRITE THEM DOWN.)

I like sticky notes: they're readily available in all offices, they're pretty cheap, and (most importantly) they can be rearranged if it turns out that I forgot a step or put the steps in the wrong order (which, like, let's be honest, I am definitely going to do). But they kill trees and create unnecessary methane emissions, so I've recently switched over to using virtual sticky notes. That's the format I'm going to use for this example, but you can use anything that meets your purposes.

So, you've got something to write with, you're ready to start.

The first question is: what are you trying to accomplish here? What would "done" look like? What is our goal?

I need to end up with a version of Rosetta that will make the correct results if you don't want calls, and will also make the correct results if you do.

The goal here is that you end up with a statement that you can definitively say (a) Yes this is what I wanted or (b)No this is not right because _______

In this case, in order to do that, I'll need to define "correct results" for both call- and non-call versions. But if I have that nailed down, then this statement meets that criterion: I'll be able to say "Yes, this is what I wanted: see, it makes the correct result for calls, and it makes the correct result for not-calls". Or else I'll be able to say, "No, this is wrong: see, it makes the correct result for calls, but on not-calls it does X and we wanted Y."

I have a clear, definitive standard about what I need to do and whether or not I've done it.

But there was a prerequisite there: I need to define "correct results".

So that goes on a sticky note: Create test that will compare my results to existing call!Rosetta-results and to existing not-call!Rosetta-results.

[ID: Two blue boxes, one on top of the other. The top one says in white text "Create test to compare my results to call!results" The bottom one says "Create test to compare my results to not-call!results"] OK. So now we know what we want. The second question is: what do we need to do in order to get that? Here's where the sticky-note recording system really shines, because you don't have to answer this question sequentially. You just start writing down every single thing that is not the way you want it to end up.

I need it to remove commas in the python script, not the bash script

I need to delete the first part of the get_runs() function, which doesn't do anything

I need to delete the rest of the parameters passed to build_query_script() function, because runs encompasses all the others

while we're on that subject, runs doesn't even need the group_variable, so let's pull that out of the parameter document

we also have a dmf defined, which the bash script demands but doesn't use; let's change that demand

since we're changing the structure of the parameter document, we don't need to pull new metrics for each run, so let's move that outside of the runs() loop and only run once

right now the parameter document is ALMOST but not quite "one row per template". Make it so it's actually one row per template.

among other things, that's going to require making it possible for a template to be followed by nothing at all, since it's the assumption that a template will have a metrics block after it that makes it not quite one row per template. So make it possible to publish a template with a null block

the other thing that's weirdly hard-coded is the definition of what a block looks like. Would it make more sense to separate that out into an input file, like the parameters document? On the one hand, that would make it much more flexible; on the other hand, that's another piece that can break. Don't know. Put a question mark on it.

etc

Here's what it looks like at the end of this step:

[ID: A black and white background showing many boxes in two different shades of blue, all with white text. Some of the boxes are overlapping each other.]

As you can see, at this phase you don't need to worry about any of the following:

ordering the tasks. Just stick 'em right on top of each other for now

how you're going to do any of this. Right now we just need to know what, not how

sticking to only one project. As I was working on this, it occurred to me that this whole process would have been a heck of a lot easier if someone had just made a user manual for this, and since I have to go through all the code line-by-line anyway, I might as well write up the documentation while I'm at it. (To help out future-me, if nothing else.) So I put those tasks on another color of sticky note.

making notes that make any ***ing sense to anyone else. This process is for you, and only you need to understand what you're talking about it. Phrase it in ways that make sense to your brain, and to hell with anyone else.

on that topic, also don't worry about making steps that are "too small" or "too dumb" to write down. This is for you. If "save document" feels like a step to you, then write it down.

You also don't need to get every single step involved in the project right now. Get as many as you can, to be sure, but the process is designed on the assumption that you ARE going to forget important steps, and is designed to handle that.

When you can't think of any more steps, then the third question is: what order does it make sense to do these in? Are there any steps that would be easier if you did another step first? Are there any that literally cannot be done unless another step is complete?

This is also a good place to group steps if they fit together nicely. When I used physical sticky notes, I used two different sizes; digitally I can of course make them whatever size I want.

So I have several documentation steps that (a) do need to be written to make sense to other people and (b) I really need to know what's going on before I can do that. I could write them now, but if I did, I'd just end up re-writing them based on things that change as I'm coding. So we'll move those to the end:

[ID: Three dark blue boxes with white text. They read "Create step-by-step instructions for creating your own metric agg", "Create step-by-step instructions for modifying a metric", "Create step-by-step instructions for modifying a query."]

These parts, though -- if I had all the variable structures written down, I could look at them while I'm coding. Then I won't have to keep scrolling back and forth in the code, trying to remember if it's an array or a dictionary while also trying to remember what part of the code I was working on. Brilliant. Move that to the front.

[ID: Seven dark blue boxes with white text, three large, four small. The first one is large and says "Write up explanation of how Rosetta works." The second one is large and says "Document structure of all variables." Attached to that one are four smaller boxes that say "All_blocks", "Runs", "metric", "New_block". The third large one says "Document what qb_parameters.csv contains"]

Also, while I'm at it, I should get the list of variables I need to document -- then I won't have to keep scrolling to find them. Make those sub-steps.

I definitely keep needing to look up what's in the parameters document, so I should write that down, too. For the user manual I also should write down what's in the metric document, but I don't need that for myself, so I can send that to the end.

[ID: The same three dark blue boxes from two screenshots ago (create step-by-step instructions for metric agg, modifying a metric, and modifying a query), now with another dark blue box in front of them with white text that says "Document what granular_metrics.tsv contains."]

These five are all small steps, and are all related in that they don't actually (hopefully) change the functionality of the code; they're just stuff left over from prior versions of this code. So we can lump them all together.

[ID: Five light blue boxes with white text that say "Delete first part of get_runs()", "Have build_query_script only receive the "run" parameter" "Delete dmf" "Move metrics=get_metrics() outside build_all_blocks (all the way up to the top level?" "Delete group_variable from qp_parameters"]

My brain likes this better, so that I can keep track of fewer "main steps", but that's just a peculiarity of me -- you should lump and split however you prefer to make this process easier for you.

[ID: The same five boxes from the prior screenshot, now all made smaller and attached to a larger box that says "Remove Legacy Code"]

Keep going, step by step, sticky by sticky, until you've got them in order. If -- while you're doing this -- you remember another thing you need to do, write it on a sticky and slap it on the pile; you don't have to stop what you're doing to deal with it, because it's written down and it's on the pile and it will get processed; you can just keep working on the thing you're on right now.

[ID: All the same boxes from the first screenshot, now in a neat row. Some of the original boxes have been grouped together. The ones that were said to be at the beginning of the process are on the left and the ones that were said to be at the end are on the right.]

Step four: for the love of all that's holy, SAVE THIS LIST.

Write it on your cubicle whiteboard where it won't be erased

write it on a piece of paper and tape it to the office wall

send an email to yourself

take a picture with your phone

I don't care but save it.

When I used physical sticky notes, I kept them all on the hood of my cubicle's shelf. Now, as you can see, I use Powerpoint, which is irritating af but does allow me to keep everything in a single document, which I can write down the path of.

[ID: White text on a black background says "open ~/Documents/Rosetta\ Modifications\ and \Documentation.pptx" The next line says "Notes in Rocketbook pg 10-12, 16" The next line says "Turn that into documentation that can be used for making modifications."]

And now (finally) you can answer the question "How would I even get started on that?" You look at the first thing on the list, and you treat it as its own project. You can hyperfocus on this step and completely forget about everything else this project requires, because everything you need to remember for the rest of it is written down.

If, as you're working a step, you think of something else you need to do for the big project, write it on a sticky and slap it on the pile. Don't even worry about trying to order it or identify sub-steps; as long as it's not blocking the thing you need to work on right now, you don't have to care. Just stick that bugger anywhere at all on the list, and go back to what you were doing. When you un-hyperfocus and come back to look at your list, there'll be a big sticky note stuck sideways across all the rest of the steps, and you'll remember to file and order it then.

Other benefits of this system

1) The first question really helps with unclear directions from your boss. You can take whatever they told you to do, and translate it into a requirement that is clearly either met or not-met, and then run it back by the boss.

If they say, "No, no, we want ______" then phew! You just saved a huge miscommunication and weeks of wasted work! What a good employee you are! What an excellent team player with strong communication skills!

If they say "Yes, that's what I want," then you know -- for sure -- what it is you're trying to accomplish. Your anxiety is reduced, and your boss thinks you're super-conscientious.

(And if your boss is a jerk who likes to move the goalposts and blame it on their subordinates, then have this conversation over email, so you can show it to their boss or to HR should it become necessary.)

2) Having this project map means that when you spend an hour staring at the requirements and trying to figure out how to get started (which, let's be honest, you were definitely going to do anyway) ... When your boss/coworker comes by and says, "How's it going?" Instead of having to say "I haven't even started 😞" You can say, "Pretty well! I've got all the steps mapped out and am getting ready to start on implementation!" and show them your list, and they think you're very organized and meticulous. 3) Sometimes, especially in corporate jobs, you and your coworkers will run into a problem that's too big for even Neurotypicals to hold all in their heads. At that point, the NTs will be completely lost -- they've never had to develop a way to handle projects they can't just look at and know how to get started. So then you pipe up in the meeting and say, "OK, well, what exactly are we trying to accomplish?" and everybody at the conference table looks at you like you're a goddamned genius and you don't have to tell them that you use this exact same process to remember how to make a sandwich 😅

4) Having this project map makes it so much easier to stop work and then start it up again later, but this post is already really really really long, so I'm going to address that in a separate (really really long) post.

[paimon-rambles]

Alphabet Fluff

Characters: Aether

A gift to my sister cause she never stops thirsting 😒 @katsukiibug

Doing all of them ;-;

Icon credit: Leheia

-

A ctivities - What do they like to do with their s/o? How do they spend their free time with them?

Aether is opened to any activities his partner throws at him. He's not very picky.

But he does enjoy some dinner dates and strolls around the city, wheater it is Liyue or Mondstadt. He pays for all meals and snacks with the Mora he got from his travels.

Be warned, however, cause Paimon ain't gonna shut up about the food. Regardless it's comforting, followed by a nice walk through the city basked in moonlight.

Aether also in general likes to travel with you, other than Paimon you're his companion. He likes to take you to the forest to pick berries or other essential resources, beneficial for future endeavors.

Stories from his travels? Aether could ramble about for hours. Describing the little mishaps and mischief he and his sister found themselves in. Though he gets really sad whenever his sister is brought up.....oofles

He's traveled from world to world was introduced to many hobbies and games of variety, he's happy to introduce you to some of them if your willing to try something new out.

B eauty - What do they admire about their s/o? What do they think is beautiful about them?

Your patience

Aether has a bit of a packed schedule; assisting with commissions and dealing with hilichrul attacks. Not to mention his mind is set on finding the 7 archons in the hope to find his sister. He's incredibly busy most of the times

He doesn't ignore you on purpose, but he's dragged everywhere. Poor guy:(

But he admires that you don't fuss about it and always hold patience. Of course, Aether will find a way to make it up to you eventually. He tends to send small souvenirs from his travels as a form of apology.

Your comfort

He recently lost his sister and is overhwaled by all these tasks placed on his heavy and tired shoulders. He leans on you when he needs that moment of peace or comfort.

He loves that you try to soothe him whenever he's in his worst moments. With your words or simple touches of comfort, he adores it all.

Your eyes

Aether loves to stare into your eyes. He finds them really beautiful and finds himself smiling whenever looking in your eyes.

He's memorized by how they lightly sparkle or glimmer depending on your emotions. Or how they light up whenever you laugh or smile.

He finds it soothing to just lean your foreheads against each other and stare endlessly at your eyes, his worries and concerns being carried away.

C omfort - How would they help their s/o when they feel down/have a panic attack etc.?

He's a brother and understands when his partner is under stress or feeling down. Similar to how he notices the small gestures Lumine has that show her emotions are swirling in her head.

He picks up on the small hints and notices right away the shift in your behavior. You can say you're fine but he ain't falling for it, he's seen the signs.

But Aether does give the space you want. He recognizes its benefits and understands it himself; He's lost his kin, there are times Aether wants to push everyone away.

So patient, he's not pushing you into anything instead he's letting you describe what's bothering you at your pace. You can break down sobbing and he would wait while comfortably drawing stars on your back. He even has his shoulder to cry on if you want, softly running his hand through her hair in comforting motions.

He tries his best to give advice from his own experience. He makes a promise to cheer you later. He's just trying to make you happy again cause he hurting inside if you're not :(

D reams - How do they picture their future with their s/o?

Aether pictures the future from time to time. Mainly thinking about finding his sibling. He pictures two outcomes the good now and the one he dreads dearly.

Of course, since you are his s/o, you do play role in some of the scenarios he plays on his head.

He wonders what will be of the relationship after he finds his sibling, would they continue to travel worlds as they had done previously?

It was his sister and himself life's work of jumping planet to planet and learning of the different kingdoms and such.

Teyvat is your home, you have all your plans for the future in this world, he couldn't force you to leave.

So he rather hears of your views on the future instead, listening closely as you explain everything you have planned while his heart slowly aches as he debates for his future.

E qual - Are they the dominant one in the relationship, or rather passive?

He sees you as his equal. Nothing less or more- though he looks to up you a lot

He doesn't let any status you may hold hinder the relationship, and he wishes the same. He may be a traveler from another world, praised for his achievements, and his reputation in the nation's placed his name high. But Aether doesn't want that to affect his relationship with his lover.

So yee equals =

F ight - Would they be easy to forgive their s/o? How are they fighting?

He hates fighting :(

Soft boy can't handle arguing with his s/o. It breaks his heart every time. Instantly feels guilty, even if he wasn't in the wrong.

Because of this arguments are incredibly rare. He's not an angry person in general and tends to stay positive most of the time. It will only occur if he's incredibly pent up about a situation. He'd bottle up those emotions before the string being pulled and he snaps.

Easy to forgive, the moment he notices he's angry he's apologizing for lashing out. Poor boy can't handle you being scared, upset, and disappointed with him.

After a fight, he gives you the space needed before checking on you and asking if you're alright. Aether would pull you into a hug, and probably sob depending on how bad the fight was. Cuddles until your both happy again or unless you really don't want to be in his presence at the moment.

If the fight was really bad he gives you some space to think for a bit and try to get it off his head. Afterward, he goes to apologize to you, to where you either sob together or things go back to normal right after

Apologizes repeatedly to you, you could say you've forgiven him but he's gonna continue apologizing for another hour or so.

G ratitude - How grateful are they in general? Are they aware of what their s/o is doing for them?

Incredibly grateful for every little act his s/o does for him. Ever since losing his sister, he's been in a void and his s/o has been the light helping him back to his feet. Cheesy I know-

But he truly appreciates everything you do for him, it always brings a smile to his face whenever his s/o does the most simple little acts that go a long way for him. He acknowledges even the smallest of things

Simple acts such as setting up his stuff before he goes to complete commissions or cooking him some food. It always makes his day better.

H onesty - Do they have secrets they hide from their s/o? Or do they share everything?

Aether tells his partner pretty much everything, he dislikes keeping you in the dark. He would be really upset and heartbroken if he found out his s/o was hiding anything from him

He relies on you a lot, he tells you everything because you always put him at ease.

However, there are a few things that he would hide for a short time. He would tell his partner eventually but needs some time to plan out how to tell them. But those moments are rare and in between.

If he did find out that his s/o was hiding something from him, he'd be so torn :< feels betrayed a in way that you hid something from him.

Of course, he would listen to your reasoning as to why you kept secrets, but he starts to distance himself for a bit.

I nspiration - Did their s/o change them somehow, or the other way around? Like trying out new things or helped them overcome personal problems?

Aether works harder for you. In other words, he's constantly trying to impress you. He tries to act heroically around you to make you smile and all.

He learned to not always feel so down because of his sister and take time to be happy as well

He for sure helps you overcome any problems or barriers that have been holding you back, taking one step at a time. You work it out together and he's patient with the process

He's always inspired by you, he works harder for you and tries to complete his commissions at a faster rate so he can spend the rest of the day work you.

J ealousy - Do they get jealous easily? How do they deal with it?

Can go both ways. On one hand, Aether isn't really one to get jealous, as he has complete trust in his partner but on the other hand, there are times when he gets insecure or jealous over somethings

But for the most part he isn't jealous, there are moments where he's scared to lose you like he lost his sister, to be left alone again :<<

In the moments where he is jealous, he would tell his s/o that he's feeling envious. Getting it off his chest and hoping his S/o would help calm down his worries

If he's feeling really envious, which are incredibly rare, he would avoid you for a bit trying to let his jealousy die away before confronting you

He'd feel really bad if he accidentally made you feel jealous instead. He would remind you that all his love is reserved for you and only you.

K iss - Are they a good kisser? What was the first kiss like?

Something like that done here

An average kisser, a bit inexperienced when it comes to kissing, you're his first boyfriend/girlfriend but he caught on really fast.

But because of this, your first kiss ended up being really awkward and Aether got incredibly flustered cause he believed he did something wrong

He's still really shy whenever he kisses you, he grows flustered whenever you intimate the kiss.

His kisses are really gentle, pressing his lips against yours softly. Each kiss is filled with emotions, all his love into each one. Very gentle boi

L ove Confession - How would they confess to their s/o?

A mess

Poor boi is stuttering and fumbling over his words. He a nervous wreck but he's trying his best.

He planned everything out but when the moment came he tripped over his words.

He invites you over for a nice dinner, nothing too fancy and nothing too cheap, just right. He pays for food, slowly bringing the conversation to an idea of a relationship. Of course, he's hella flustered and trying not to show(which he does) it.

Then he kinda blurts out that he has a crush on you and wants to try out a relationship

If you say yes he's gonna have a huge smile on his face for the rest day, it's really adorable TwT

If you say no, however, he freezes in place for a while, the whole thing repeating in his head up to the point where you rejected him. He apologizes and excuses himself. You don't see him for a couple of days, since aether is avoiding you, he's really embarrassed to talk to you. Oh and congratulations you get a nasty nickname from Paimon :D

M arriage - Do they want to get married? How do they propose? What would the marriage be like?

He thought about it at least once when your relationship was growing. Similar to dreams, he had different scenarios in this head for the future and how they could play out.

He would like to get married one day, yes, but it isn't something he sees doing anytime soon as his primary goal is to find his sister, afterward however he will look into it more and suggest the idea to his s/o.

In terms of how he proposes, he takes you on a little adventure that highlights some your adventures you had together near the beginning of your friendship, before getting on one knee and popping the question.

Kind of that nostalgic feeling you get as you reminisce on some of the old memories you created together

The both of you plan the ceremony and incorporate your ideas into one. It's gonna be a big wedding though since pretty much all of Mondstadt, Liyue, and other nations that are yet to be explored will be attending.

Of course, if you wish for a smaller wedding, he doesn't mind at all and will plan out something smaller. He personally likes a small wedding too :)

N icknames - What do they call their s/o?

Aether isn't too keen on nicknames for his s/o but he does have a few. But for the most part, he calls you y/n, especially in public

He calls you sometimes a shorter version of your name. Or a flower that reminds him of you.

Really depends on your personality as well and which flower it associates with, or he might have a silly nickname for you that he called you once and it stuck with him. However, those types of nicknames are used rarely depending on the circumstance.

O n Cloud Nine - What are they like when they are in love? Is it obvious for others? How do they express their feelings?

Blush blush blush blush

He might be a little oblivious to it since your his first, he doesn't realize it until someone cough venti cough points out to him.

He's in denial at first, swirling over his words while his face reveals the truth. He's crushing hard

Aether tries to mask his little crush from you and he does pretty well minus a few moments where he's got off guard, que flustering soft boi

But when he's in love, he has a smile on his whenever speaking to the person that makes his heart skip a beat. It's pretty prominent to others once you notice the behavior shift from someone random to you.

He expresses his love in a little of everything; kisses and little hugs along with serenading you in words or perhaps gifting you something. A little mix of all of them

His favorite way to express his love is to have his hand intertwine with yours. It's simple but it comforts him knowing you're close. He loves it whenever you give him a slight squeeze of reassurance; it never fails to put a smile on his face

P DA - Are they upfront about their relationship? Do they brag with their s/o in front of others? Or are they rather shy to kiss etc. when others are watching?

Shy boy gets flustered in private, he gets really flustered showing PDA in public.

Don't get me wrong he loves showering you in affection but he gets easily flushed at the idea of people watching him kiss his s/o or giving them a comforting hug.

His PDA is average, he's open to hand-holding in public because it comforts him without having to do anything too affectionate in the public eye

He doesn't brag either, most people already know the existence of your relationship.

Although for the most part, he's trying to keep it a secret because of the Fatui and the threat it could place on you. You don't want La Signora chasing after you.

Q uirk - Some random ability they have that's beneficial in a relationship.

Paimon is usual around Aether meaning that whenever your feeling hungry, Paimon can point out the best places to sit down and have a delicious meal

An expert treasure hunter is in your area, and you're dating him! He knows where to find hints and little clues for treasures and can open any lock or seal. Many fortunes

He has so many stories to tell from his previous travels. It helps you connect more as you listen to him tell you every memory he can remember from the worlds he visited. You never get bored by his stories either.

R omance - How romantic are they? What would they do to make their s/o happy? Cliché or rather creative?

He's can be really creative in his antic when it comes to making his s/o happy, but he also sticks to some more cliche methods as well

As mentioned previously he's visited many worlds and has seen the various ways people would do to cheer up their partners.

He uses that to his advantage when trying something to get that smile he loves dearly on your face

But the also likes to take some classic routes, little gifts, or acts of affection to make you happy

Perhaps a rose banquet one day and something new and really imaginative the next. He can be a wild card when deciding

One time he jokingly asked Paimon for advice, of course, she suggested having sticky honey roast as a nice evening lunch date. Which he ended up taking you to that afternoon

He's willing to do anything-within reasonable terms- to make his s/o happy. If just point something out or specify on what would make you really happy; chances are he's going to do it for you

S upport - Are they helping their s/o achieve their goals? Do they believe in them?

100% support in you

He wants to see your goals accomplished as well. Just like your helping him find his sister, he helps you achieve your goal

If you allow him, he's willing to put aside some of his commissions to help you plan and get a better roadmap to obtain your goal

Aether helps keep you motivated whenever you're feeling down, reminding you of what you have accomplished so far. Cooking you food or bringing you some water to get your brain flowing again. As well as some encouragement from Paimon, although she tends to over exaggerate most of the time

He is also sure to help you take breaks whenever you're pushing yourself too much. He takes you outside to pick plants or berries, but it's really soothing and distracting

T hrill - Do they need to try out new things to spice out your relationship? Or do they prefer a certain routine?

It's an adventure every day with Aether

At the beginning of the relationship, he tried to follow a more classical relationship routine. Since he was so new to affection, e mimicked what he saw other couples do thinking it was the correct way to go. But after spending more time with you he strayed away from that, adding his own ideas along with yours

He's constantly traveling the world, meeting archons and other powerful beings. There always a battle to be fought or a harbinger to run from. A lot can happen in one day

And you're his trusty and equal companion, he likes to bring you along through the chaos that is Teyvat

In other words, there is always a thrill in your relationship, plus Aether is always open to trying something new occasionally. Never a dull moment except for that one lazy Sunday where you cuddle all day, but it's really wholesome

U nderstanding - How good do they know their partner? Are they empathetic?

Aether picks up on the little things that signal a behavior shift within you. With these notices he acts quickly to be sure your alright and accesses if he needs to shower you in more affection in order to make you happy >:0

He tries to sympathize with his partner, trying to understand the emotions they're going through. He understands grief and anger, as he had experienced it with the loss of his kin, and knows how to help alleviate his s/o

But he does try his best to help cheer you up regardless of the emotions you are feeling. Paimon is even there to cheer you with her own words

V alue - How important is the relationship to them? What is it’s worth in comparison to other things in their life?

Aether's relationship with you is something he holds close to his heart. It's incredibly important to him, and he is sure to voice how important you are to him.

His s/o is that last speck of hope and happiness in his life after being filled with pain for so long. He'd be devastated without you

Unfortunately, his sister is his first priority, his family comes close. Lumine is the only kin he has. But your also really important to him, and so he tries to shower you with affection daily

W ild Card - A random Fluff Headcanon.

Your Paimon's close friend, you get to hear her ramble about food- a lot. But she's also really supportive of your relationship, she's noticed how much happier Aether had become since then.

Aether likes it whenever you braid his hair. Finding it soothing as your fingers gently comb through his golden locks

X OXO - Are they very affectionate? Do they love to kiss and cuddle?

A shy boy wanting to shower his s/o in affection. He's not the most affectionate person out there but he does try to be romantic and such

He adores hugs more than kisses, he finds it further comforting to hold his partner close and reassured that there beside him. He wishes he could cuddle with you for hours however commissions among other tasks that always pull him back

He also likes kisses, there always gentle and soft and he mainly kisses you on the cheek, forehead, or lips.

So overall he is pretty affectionate and he tries his best to make you feel loved

Y earning - How will they cope when they’re missing their partner?

He can handle it for a few days, he has trust in you and your abilities. But he does think about you whenever you have to leave, wishing he could go with you. He's already missing your presence the moment you kissed him goodbye before venturing off to whatever.

Then he starts to become worried, his head is racing even though you're fine. He's trying to stay calm in the situation, which he does pretty well but it's clear something is troubling the traveler from another world. Nonetheless, he doesn't act out that worry

He starts to take up more commissions in hopes it will put his mind off It, overworking himself just a tad too much until he finds himself exhausted and turns in to rest for the night.

He refrains from any thoughts involving you being in a dangerous circumstance, he's trying to stay positive and counting down the days until your arrival back to Mondstadt or Liyue. But he has had that one thought or two, dreading over his shoulders

When you do return, the moment he spots your familiar figure; his mind is washed with relief as he makes his way towards you. He approaches with a soft, kind smile as he engulfs you into a hug. He asks you how the journey or task went and if you hit any roadblocks or difficulties.

He takes you to dinner that afternoon to talk some more, he misses you dearly :(

Z eal - Are they willing to go to great lenghts for the relationship? If so, what kind of?

As mentioned before Aether tries his best to make you happy, he'll try somethings out but he won't cross any unnecessary lines or ones that shouldn't be crossed

Listen- he's stolen a Gods Lyre, angered the cryo God, fought a Harbinger, and almost destroyed a nation- oh and he's a garden thief. He's willing to go to some extra lengths to make you happy-he just doesn't want to add on to the list of chaos that had occurred already

But as mentioned previously, his main goal is finding his sister and he tries not to stray from it too much. But yes, he does care about your relationship and he is sure to remind you that you always hold a special place in his heart :)

-

I'm done omg, yay

[stray-kids-react]

02 liner aussie girl joining the group

Masterlist

...

Bang Chan

° Sees you as a little sister, and will baby you nonstop for that reason alone. Expect very long hugs and him trying to beg you for some affection.

° Let Felix take charge in helping you around JYP, watching from afar like a proud father. Even if you aren't much younger than the members, he can't help but become a giddy mess when you literally do anything.

° Since he sees you as a little sister, that also means he is very protective over you. Not even Minho can tease you for too long without Chan becoming a bit tense. He just doesn't want you to ever feel uncomfortable.

° Does many vlives with you, chatting about your life and what parts of Australia you grew up in. Whenever he is introducing you or if you call him during a vlive, he'll call you little sissy.

° Many stays have made edits of Chan babying you or treating you like a literal angel, you both have watched edits like these and neither of you can deny that he doesn't do either of those things.

"My little sissy y/n did great today in our dance practice, isn't that right sissy?" he asked, sitting you on his lap.

"Yeah, Minho Oppa helped me learn quite a bit. But I couldn't have succeeded it without my personal cheerleader Chris." You replied.

Lee Know

° Doesn't make a huge deal out of it, is honestly just really happy to have a new member. He doesn't care that your a girl or a fellow aussie, just sees you as a member.

° If you are ever struggling with Korean he'll do his best to try and help you, even if it is only on small thing such as the way you pronounce words. He admits to finding your struggles pretty adorable.

° Even though he is a huge tease, he'll go easy on you for the first two months. Letting you get settled in and get use to the chaotic behavior of all of them. But after those months pass, he'll start to tease.

° Minho likes to challenge you to dance battles during practice, seeing if you will ever beat him on one. But luckily whenever Snsd comes on you are in your element, showing him the true Gee master.

° Minho has a soft spot fro you due toy your age, he won't tease you too harshly and won't get mad if you don't remember one of his cat's names. All of the members notice his new soft spot for you.

"So I know Soonie, Doongie... And?" you sighed, trying to remember the third cat of Minho's.

"Dori, it's okay. At least you remembered two of them." He reassured, Felix looking at him with shock from across the room.

Changbin

°When he heard that you would be joining the group, he hoped that you wouldn't make fun of him as much as the other members. And if you did, it wouldn't be too harsh.

° Appreciated that you weren't teasing him 24/7, and if you are shorter than him then he would be very smiley and giddy for days. Changbin likes your company and would often want to hang around you.

° Buys you coffee/tea every morning, and only you (occasionally Felix). And when the members ask, he explains that you earned your coffee/tea by not teasing him. Even if they haven't teased him for days.

° You are his favorite member, even if he won't admit it... Everyone knows it. You are his best friend and he doesn't want that relationship to change. Unlike the fan's pov, he sees you only as a best friend.

° Whenever he does a vlive with you, your ship name is all over the chat. Neither of you speak out about it, but both of you don't like each other in that way. And it makes situations awkward when they ship you two.

"I can't believe we're a ship, that is so weird to me." You chuckled, scrolling through Instagram on your phone.

"I know right! I don't get why a girl and a guy can't be friends without people shipping them." He sighed, clearly frustrated.

Hyunjin

° Becomes putty in your hands, he just finds everything about you adorable. It also doesn't help that you are Australian, which he happens to have an interest in.

° He wouldn't describe his feelings towards you as a crush, more as a little sister and der brother relationship. He would feel weird if you ever developed something for him, since he is too close to you to be a couple.

° Very clingy towards you, constantly draping himself across you. Or sitting you on his lap when you are worn out from practice, he often let's you take naps on him. He also treats you to sweets, even when on diets.

° Hyunjin once got frustrated over how JYP was treating you, giving you an extreme diet even though you were already working hard enough. So he'd reassure you that him and Chan would talk with JYP about it.

° Hyunjin can be seen copying your accent, whether it be for fun or just to tease you. He'll copy or pick up on your accent, many fan's hearts melting at his determination to be part of the aussie line.

"I shouldn't be having this cupcake." You sighed, placing the cupcake you've been eyeing for the past few minutes.

"Screw JYP, eat what you want. You are your own person and shouldn't listen to some old man." He defended, passing the cupcake.

Han

° Was the first member you met, even though it was by total accident. You both ran into each other when he was leaving the building and you were entering.

° You dropped the coffee all onto yourself in shock, making him chuckle as he tried to help you clean yourself up. He helped you into JYP, having no clue that you are going to be the new member joining.

° When Chan introduced you to the members the next day, Han was shocked. He was surprised to see a familiar face, but was also pleased knowing you seemed to be quite a sweet and charming person.

° You both are the stars whenever on reality shows together, many seeing you both as a chaotic duo. Doni and Coni once tried to correct you, telling you that women shouldn't be so hyper. Han got pissed.

° Not only did Han correct them on their manners, but also told them that a man shouldn't tell a woman what to do. Many fans and netizens applauded him for protecting his new and sweet Maknae.

"I swear those guys get on my nerves sometimes, don't listen to them." He sighed, patting your head softly.

"It's okay Hannie, I'm glad that I have some older brothers to stand up for me." You reassured, melting his heart.

Felix

° You are nervous to be around Felix, not because he's intimidating or harsh. But because he is so nice and angelic, and you don't want to develop a crush on a member.

° Even if you don't see him in that light at first, it will happen eventually because he has such an addicting energy that surround him. Felix is a sunshine, and it isn't hard to see why everyone loves him.

° Felix wants to make you feel as comfortable as possible, usually being the member picking up pads/tampons for you. He secretly develops a small crush on you, but he knows it would end up bad.

° You both would be worried about it ending bad due to the popularity of the band, Felix's popularity, your new career, and JYP's strict rules. So both of you don't truly progress that side of your relationship.

° It could blossom into something more serious in the future, but for right now it is just a mutual crush that both of you must hide. Your friendship is still very strong nonetheless, and you appreciate that.

"Okay here's a hard question, Back Door or All In?" you asked, as the managers watched you both from behind the camera.

"Neither because you aren't in them." He answered, trying to play it off as playful more so than flirtatious.

Seungmin

° Seungmin is your dorm mate, who always manages to make your nights more calm. He reassures you every night that you are doing great, even if you don't believe him.

° You both wrote down a schedule for dishes, laundry, cooking ect. The only exceptions to it is having a terrible day, birthday, or being sick. Either than that then you must follow the schedule stuck into the fridge.

° You both have derpy photos of each other as your wallpapers, both being taken when both of you just woke up. Seungmin can't help but giggle silently whenever he opens up his phone, looking at your bed head.

° Seungmin helps you out with waking up, letting you get use to the schedule of being an idol. Taking as many pillows to the face as he needs to for you to finally wake up, Once getting feathers in his hair due to it.

° Many think you both knew each other before you became a member, but you both explained that you just understand each other well and clicked when you met. Neither of you grew up together.

"Is today you dish day or mine?" he asked, bottle of soap already in his hand ready to begin cleaning.

"Mine, but I had a terrible day today. JYP critiqued everything about me." You huffed, getting a soft hug from Seungmin.

Jeongin

° Is glad he won't be babied as much since he isn't the maknae anymore, but will miss the benefits of being able to aegyo your way out of responsibilities.

° All of the members call you the babies or the baby line, even if either of you ar taller than some of them. Jeongin is also appreciative that he now has someone to relate to with being a babied quite often.

° He'll still call you noona just to get under your skin, but you honestly don't mind being called noona or unnie. Especially since some stays are younger than you, but you can become playfully annoyed at times.

° Jeongin will warm up to you very fast and treat you like a sister, he'll spoil you with stuffies and share his food with you every meal. Even though mama gets scold him for it, he doesn't care and continues to do it.

° Chan will cover both of your eyes when the members do something sexy, even if you kind of want to see it (mostly to tease them). But you understand why, since both fo you will get flustered by it easily.

"Y/n noona likes to steal my food sometimes." Jeongin admitted to fans, smiling at your playful glare.

"You share your food and insist I eat it Jeongin Oppa." You defend, watching the fans respond to the situation.

[minimoxha]

Batfam Valentines Day Special

 The batfamily takes Valentine’s Day very...very seriously.

Characters: Jason Todd, Tim Drake, Damian Wyane, Dick Grayson, Bruce Wyane, Y/n L/n(Batmom), Alfred Pennyworty

Warning(s): None

1,579 Words

Not edited.

(A/N I know Valentine’s Day passed but I got this idea after it so...deal with it.)

All throughout Wayne manor, everyone was preparing for the day known as Valentine’s Day. They were moving so fast it made it seem like they were competing. Probably because...they were. Why? Because today was Valentine’s Day and they all wanted to give you the best day but every one of them wanted to do different things. So when Jason first joined the family, it became a competition to see which one could give you the best time with them.

You woke up to the sweet smell of French toast, a smile Turing on your face. You knew what day it was, possibly one of your favorite days other than Christmas or your birthday of course. Damian was the first to come in your room, Laing down and cuddling with you. No matter how people saw him on the outside, he was a soft and cuddly bear on the inside. “Good morning Mother. You’ll spend time with me first, right? I am your favorite so it’s only natural I go first.” Damien Gloated, making you emit a small giggle. “Dami, I told you that it was dickies turn this year.” You said making the young boy groan in response and get ready to lift up but relaxed his body again once you started to run your hands through his hair. “Who’s cooking for me Dami?” Damien answered your question by counting to five on his fingers. Once he got to five, Jason came through the door holding a tray of food, Bruce with a card and flowers, dick holding cups and apppe juice, (Apple juice is better than orange.), and Tim holding coffee cups.

All four of the men walked into the room, Joining you and Damian on the bed, not before saying good morning to you. “Flowers? For me?” You teased, smelling the roses. “They were from me” Bruce admitted, a smirk crossing his face making Jason roll his eyes. “So who gets you first, ma?”  Jason asked. “Hm...Dickie.” You smiled at your oldest, making him mirror his expression and everyone else groan. It was sweet really, instead of spending time with their friends or significant other they wanted to give the day to you. All of you had busy schedules so these were one of the days they could spend a lot of fun time with their mommy. After everyone finished eating, dick gave you an outfit and waited outside your door for you to change. “So you know that musical you wanted to see? Well I Got tickets, the best seats!” He cheered. You squeezed from inside the room, quickly opening your door. “My outfit looks great on you.” He smiled. You were wearing High waisted black pants and a gray hoodie with no hood that was a little too big for you. 

Dick was right, they were amazing seats. The both of you were in Love with the musical and tried to keep yourselves from singing but failed, earn dirty looks from the people around you. (I didn’t make more because idk but if you want short tories on how the details went during everyones time with Y/n tell me))After you left the theater, the both of you got slushies and cinnamon rolls (Even though it was 11Am, your dentist is pissed rn) and then he returned you home and went to his brothers ti gloat and tell him how the defenitly won and had the best time with you. Next was Jason, right when you walked in he got you and took you back out. “What do you have planned fir me today, JayJay?” You asked following him after he grabbed a bag onto his motorcycle . “You can choose between a Monster Truck Rally and Paint balling Ma.” He said. “Paint-balling” Nodding, he drove off to a paint ball arena with you holding onto his back. He arrived at the place and signed in. The both of you were taken into the back where you got a run down and gear. “Dickies going to be pissed that his outfit is covered in paint.” You giggled, putting on your gear along with Jason and listening to the rules. You didn’t follow them though. The both of you DEMOLISHED every kid, adult, and teen, only getting a few paintballs on yourself. Then it came down to you and Jason. He stalked around you, trying to be be intimidating but failing with a smile. “Theres only room for one paintballer in this town” He said, faking a country accent.  

“Well then, It’ll have to be me!” You yelled, shooting three at him then ducking under a rock. He successfully dodged your attacks making the game go on for what felt like forever for the bystanders but just a couple minutes for you. It seemed like it was going to go on forever until Jason tripped on a rock and fell, giving you the chance to shoot him right in his butt. “Suck it, Jay!” You yelled, doing your victory dance in front of him. Jason smiled, he loved seeing you in this mood. With work, and watching from the batcomptr, you were either on edge or stressed out of your mind, And once you got competitive, you stayed competitive until you won. Constantly, challenging your family to games. “Ill beat you next Time, Ma’” Jason laughed, fist bumping you and standing up to sling his arm around your shoulder and walk to the changing rooms with you. (Not the same one) “Guess what we got the Replacement and Demon Spawn to do for ya.” “Hm I Don't know Jay, What.” 

“I got them to share your time and have a picnic with you.” You sighed then answered, “Jay, I’ll be surprised if there still is a picnic by the time we get there.” Jason laughed at your Joke, getting the both of you on his bike and driving to a beautiful forest. The sun was cutting through the trees who's leaves were falling off. There was an opening, where Damian had lanterns all around while the picnic blanket was in the middle of a flower bed. You got off of Jasons bike and saw through the trees, Damian and Tim arguing, on the verge of turning it into a full blown fist fight. Before things escalated, you stepped in and let Jason leave the three of you alone. “Boys, please don't fight today” With one last glare, they settled down. Damian opened the light brown basket and took your favorite dishes out. “We helped Alfred make all of your favorites, Mother. I hope you enjoy them” Tim opened the Saran Wrap. “Yeah Mom, I hope you like it.” Damian put a couple heart-shaped sandwiches on your plate and poured the drinks while Tim showed you this cool coding project he had been walking on. “So mother, isn’t this the best out of both of the trips they took you on?” Damian asked, smiling slightly after biting into a cupcake and clearly enjoying it.  “I had an Amazing Day with all of you, I won't pick favorites.” You smiled and ruffled both of the boys’ hair. They were amazing children no matter they're faults. The rest of the picnic was amazing, the both of you eating until you couldn’t eat anymore and Joking around. For the first time in a while, you saw a Huge smile on both of the boys’ face. After, Tim called Alfred and he picked the both of you and took you to get your hair done, nails done and a nice dress that they (surprisingly) agreed on. They showed up at the manor and rushed Batmom to the backyard where bruce was standing in a candlelit circle. Inside it , was a couple speakers and Bruce right in the middle. His hair was slicked back and he was wearing a nice suit that matched your dress. He raised his hand out toward you and you excitedly took it.

“May I have this dance?” He smiled, pulling you into his chest. His cologne, being all that you could smell. “you may” The both of you danced like nobody was watching, because nobody was. It wasn’t like the dances you would have at formal events, where you had to dance like professionals. No, it was your own little dance party with only the two of you. You didn’t have to worry about people watching or taking pictures. After about 5 songs, the dancing stopped and Bruce slid a ring on your finger. It was a crown with the tips and middles having diamonds inside of them. “Bruce...this is beautiful” you smiled as you looked at it. Bruce snuck his hands around your waist and put his chin on top of your head. Him being the tall man that he was, he had no problems with hugging or cuddling with you while standing. “Let’s be honest My love, I gave you the best day , yes?” He smirked. Bruce was always very cocky but you found yourself more attracted to him after each word he uttered to you. “You’ll never know, Dear” You teased making him playfully sigh. “I’m the worlds greatest detective, I already know.”

“God, I love all of you so Much” Like every year, Each one of your boys always found a way to surprise you or just make your life better. They meant the world to you and if you could keep life like this you would. This was perfect. Absolute perfection

[official-weasley]

The Extraordinary Dragon (Part 1/6)

After about a century of me being gone and not writing a new story, I am back with a mini-series! 💙

I didn't have a good idea for a new OC so I decided to write a cute and fluffy story about Charlie training a dragon with a sad and mysterious past.

I would like to thank @am-i-space @madelineorionswan & @the-al-chemist for giving me ideas for the names of the dragons mentioned in the story. You are the best 💙 Since some of the dragons are mentioned in the later chapters I will make sure to include which dragons you named in the Masterlist for the story 💙

If you'd like to be tagged in every part the dragon with your name is mentioned please tell me and I will gladly do so 🤗

Warnings: Charlie being excited and obsessed with dragons.

Word count: 2,869

A dragon's roar awakened me. It might sound terrifying to some, but it is a pure melody for my ears. I have been working in the Romanian Dragon Sanctuary for almost 10 years now. Come to think of it tomorrow's the anniversary.

My co-workers constantly tease me, telling me that I'm a workaholic. I always disagree with them. I just love dragons and working with them. Am I a bit obsessed with the creatures? Maybe. But who wouldn't be so excited about having their dream job?

There is something so soothing working with a beast that can swallow you whole, yet if you have the right energy and you treat them right they can be more obedient than a Crup.

When I first got the job I worked with a team of researchers. Since I have never seen a dragon in real life before starting working, my boss Matthew wanted me to learn about their behavior and study them to be better prepared to do other things.

They all thought I will be bored out of my mind – because I applied for the care of dragons position and not researching – but I loved every second of it. All I had to do was wake up every morning and go to the assigned habitat and observe the dragon there and take notes. It's like reading a book about the creatures – something I did almost every day of my 7 years at Hogwarts – but you get to be around them every single day.

My mother thinks I am insane for wanting to be around such dangerous creatures and I had to promise her before I left for Romania that I will write home every day otherwise she is coming to get me at once. I guess she needs to know daily that I wasn't eaten by a dragon. The thing is that being hurt by a dragon is less likely than falling off a broom, so I don't know what she is so worried about.

The only one of my family members that knows about all my injuries and all my scars is my big brother Bill. He understands that I don't mind getting hurt and he doesn't get a heart attack every time I end up in the infirmary. It's nice to talk to someone about these things outside my workspace. Even though being a Curse Breaker isn't the safest job in the world, Bill's number of scars can't even compare to mine.

We do have protective gear and gloves but sometimes the dragon's fire and teeth are just too strong. We are lucky that we have wonderful healers that take care of us and we have remedies that heal burns within minutes so it's mostly just an annoyance.

The year after my training I worked only with Common Welsh Greens. The year after that I tamed two Antipodean Opaleyes and it was the best feeling to see them get excited and welcome me with a friendly roar every morning. Even though they were both adults it felt like dealing with two kids and it was so much fun. The latter are such sweethearts and I even taught one how to roll over. They are like dogs but bigger, way bigger.

After that, I tried to convince my boss to let me work with a more dangerous breed. It's not that I didn't like what I did but I like a challenge. I needed 2 months to convince him to let me work with 2 Chinese Fireballs and by the smirk on his face I knew I was in for a treat. They were brought to our reserve so they could breed but no matter how much others tried nobody succeeded at mating them.

When Matthew finally gave in – not seeing any harm in letting me try before they send them back – I remember I danced around my hut for a solid half an hour being so excited to work with them the next day.

I was surprised that nobody thought of the strategy I choose. It was true that they brought the dragons to us together but they didn't know each other and since nobody thought of trying to acquaint them first, I gave it a go.

After 3 days they were best mates and I gave them 4 more days to fully feel comfortable with each other before taking them to the mating habitat. I am more than proud to say that since then they have been parents 2 times. I did some great things since I started working in the Sanctuary but you never forget your first big achievement.

Due to Matthew being absolutely in awe of me succeeding after a week he allowed me to work with a bunch of Swedish Short-Snouts even though usually only a dragonologist with 5+ years of experience can work with them alone.

I was amused when I saw the faces of some of my older co-workers when they found out – thinking they were going to get the job. I love working with them even though they are the ones responsible for most of my scars. Just after the first day, one burned my entire forearm and everyone thought I was going to back off because of it but it only made me want to work with them more.

Now, after almost 10 years I have worked with every single breed of dragon except my favorite – the Hebridean Black. They are one of the most dangerous and stubborn kind and only a dragonologist with a lot of experience gets to work with them.

I got the glimpse of one when I was working with the research team but no matter how sneaky I tried to be, Matthew wouldn't let me get anywhere close to them. I even got a chance to work with a team that took care of a sick Norwegian Ridgeback even though they are considered to be the most dangerous.

A year ago I got a chance to be part of an exchange program at the Swedish Dragon Reserve and I worked with a Peruvian Vipertooth and a Ukrainian Ironbelly. My boss wasn't happy about the latter one as he reckoned I was too inexperienced to be around and try to tame the largest breed of dragons but as you can probably tell from what I told you so far, I was over the roof about it!

The Ironbelly might be the largest but they are among the least vicious ones – none of my co-workers would agree with me as most of them are terrified of them but I think they are adorable thinking since they are the biggest they are also the scariest. It's the same as with dogs – sometimes the smaller ones are more dangerous.

I got out of bed with a grin on my face. Even though I don't like to admit it I like reminiscing on my biggest achievements.

I made myself some breakfast – eggs and bacon as usual – while blasting music on my wireless. Nothing like singing while cooking and reading the letters my family sent me.

Mum and dad were going to visit George and Ron for the weekend. Bill and Fleur decided to repaint their living room. Ginny invited me to one of her games next week and Percy got another promotion.

I walked to the wall where I had a calendar hanging to mark the date of Ginny's game. It was the perfect event to meet with most of my family members and I love supporting her. I am proud of all my siblings' achievements but Ginny being the only girl among 6 boys made us all have a soft spot for her - even Percy, even though he would probably deny it if someone asked him about it.

Since I was working with three different dragons at the moment – Peruvian Vipertooth named Hel and two Romanian Longhorns Lasair and Rocker – I double-checked my schedule to see which one I am supposed to visit today. As I thought, it was Lasair. I know my schedule by heart but always check it twice– I don't want any dragon to be jealous thinking one is getting more attention from me.

My routine with the dragons was simple. First, they get their breakfast which is usually a piece of their favorite meat, except if it's our Common Welsh Green Crystal – she is the only dragon I have ever met that is a vegetarian and she mostly doesn't want to eat anything else than apples. It took us the longest time to figure out why she doesn't want to eat – vomiting out all the meat we gave her – until we moved her to an habitant with a pumpkin patch and them mysteriously disappearing overnight.

After the feeding, I like to play with them. That usually includes large balls or levitating rocks after which they can jump and run. Then it's my favorite part of the day – the flying lessons. We transport them to the part of the reserve that is built like a large stadium in the middle of the forest surrounded by mountains and it has 10 obstacles that the dragons have to learn to overcome so they are cleared for free-flying sessions.

After flying it's time for a brief pause to get the dragon back to its habitat and calm it down before giving it dinner and tucking it in.

Flying is the most fun thing we can do at our job. When Matthew told me that I am finally allowed to fly with them, I had to excuse myself and go to the bathroom because I felt like crying my eyes out. I wanted to fly on a dragon ever since I was a kid and even though I heard rumors about training them in that way, I always thought it was too good to be true.

The first time I flew on a dragon was with a dragonologist named Jim. He showed me how to properly prepare the dragon to be in the mood to have a person on its back and how to lift off and then safely land. Vulcan the Opaleye was just the loveliest when I trained with him to trust me to the point that he would allow me to fly. Even though my dream is to one day fly on a Hebridean Black, I wouldn't change my first flight for anything in the world.

Vulcan was more than obedient and so careful to make me feel comfortable and constantly made sure I was still on his back. He flew in a straight line and at an even pace making me feel so safe that I let go of his shiny scales and lifted my hands in the air. I wanted to shout from all the adrenaline and excitement that ran through me but I didn't want to startle the dragon.

It's safe to say that I didn't sleep at all that night. The second I laid in my bed I felt as if I was still in the air with Vulcan and I couldn't help but wish to do that every day.

"Good morning, Lasair. What do you want to eat this morning? Boar, deer, moose perhaps?"Lasair lifted her head sleepily at me. I teased her with the options, knowing full well that moose was her favorite. If she could speak she would ask me if I can't remember her favorite meal.

"Don't worry, you'll get what you want." I winked at her and put on my gloves before taking out my wand and levitating the big chunk of meat to her.

Lasair was one of the rare dragons that ate her food slowly, so I loved to sit down next to her and watched her chew. If Matthew saw me, he would probably murder me for sitting so close to a dragon but he doesn't know that Lasair and I have an agreement of her keeping me alive and I give her some extra meat for dinner in return.

"So, Lassy, I have some bad news." I cleared my throat as the dragon stopped chewing and tilted her head toward me. "We have to sharpen your claws today."

Lasair groaned and went back to her breakfast.

"I know, I know. Not your favorite thing to do. Trust me if it was up to me, we would rather do something more fun like play with your favorite tire or play fetch with your ball. But the boss said it was time."

Lasair didn't react to my words but laid on the ground once she finished her meal and wrapped her tail around me.

"You know that cuddling and being cute won't work on me." I chuckled. "Not this time, at least."

The dragon's nostrils started to smoke and I knew she was trying to negotiate.

"Between you and me," I whispered, "I'll throw in another piece of meat if you'll be a good girl like last time. How about some boar for dessert, huh?"

Lasair let out a gentle roar, giving me a sign that she agrees with my terms.

"That's my girl. I knew we'll find a common ground." I grinned at her and got up so we could start our day.

"Okay, Lassy. I will need you to step on this mat and do the burying motion. As if you were burying the bones of a deer." I explained when Lasair looked at the mat in confusion.

I mimicked the gesture and she copied it and walked to the mat with grace as if she was a princess.

"There you go! I am so proud of you, Lasair. You really want that extra piece of meat, huh?" I laughed to myself.

"So that is how you get all dragons to behave as if they're Crups?" I turned toward the voice and saw Matthew's amused face, observing my work with the Romanian Longhorn.

"You were never meant to find out," I said in a dramatic voice.

"Oh, it's fine." Matthew swung his hand. "You'll need all the skills."

"What do you mean?" I furrowed my brows at him as I stepped to Lasair to show her to step a bit forward so she could sharpen the claws on her back paws as well.

"Do you know what tomorrow is?" Matthew asked, observing my every move.

"No." I lied. I knew that tomorrow will be 10 years since I work in the reserve but I didn't want to boast about it.

"Come on, Charles. I know that you out of everyone here you’re the one who counts how long you are working here for." He smirked at me.

I couldn't believe it. He remembered that it's my 10th anniversary? I couldn't help but grin.

"What about it?" I tried acting casually.

"Well, the team was thinking about what to get you as a present..."

"Matt, you don't have to get me anything. You know I am just happy being surrounded by dragons." I smiled appreciatively.

"Well, how about you get surrounded by a new dragon?" He winked at me.

"What are you on about?" I narrowed my eyes at him. I was getting impatient, the excitement in me growing.

"We are getting a one-year-old Hebridean Black in a week from the MacFusty’s." Matthew started to explain. "And since you are so good at taming and being best mates with the three you’re taming now, I was thinking of assigning it to you."

"Did...did you just say a Hebridean Black?" I said in a voice that was barely a whisper. I couldn't believe what just came out of his mouth. He was going to let me work with my favorite breed?

"You heard correctly, Charles." Matthew's smirk was growing larger.

"But...but I don't have enough experience, you said so yourself. You...you should give the job to someone worthy, to someone who will know how to handle the breed." I knew that I should've just shut up and thank him for the opportunity. Working with a Hebridean Black has been my goal ever since I can remember, but I have to keep my head clear and think of what's best for the dragon.

"Thinking like this is exactly why I am giving the job to you even though I told you the last time you begged me that you need at least 7 more years before you can work with them." Something in his eyes shifted. He had the exact expression on his face as he did when he assigned me to breed those two Fireballs.

"You are up to something. What's wrong with the dragon?" I pursed my lips at him.

"Oh, the dragon is just fine. Lovely, actually. I bet you two will have a lot of fun." The sarcastic tone in his voice told me that he was hiding something from me but I didn't dare to ask him about it.

He deemed me ready to work with a Hebridean Black. To work with my favorite breed. I am not about to jeopardize that if he thinks I am the one for the job. In a week my biggest dream will come true and there was nothing in the world that could ruin that.