#so they'll be more than glad with such a situation

[idkimnotreal]

so in democracy 4 i can’t get reelected in brazil if i don’t solve brazil’s criminality problem...

buddy. that’s not how brazil works.

[chaoswillcalmusdown]

ted lasso needs to wrap up 3 seasons worth of plots in the next 2(?) episodes. i don't know bc i thought this ep was the last but alas, it seems to not be ??

what are they doing? wasting time on edwin akufu causing problems for sam bc of ........ spite?? making dani "even my dirty socks deserve friends" rojas be mean to his friend and also behave shittily on a plaNE where the attendants had to clean up the mess he made......... ?? the uncle holiday ?????

like, at the end of the day i get it bc they've never had proper plans for 99% of the characters. we saw roy tackle a press conference last ep which is like character growth!! we've seen jamie grow continuosly. and none of the other players ever get depth, so what is there to wrap up in their storylines????????

but like. jeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeez.

[radiance1]

Tim, officially, does not have a new caretaker.

Tim, unofficially, does have a new caretaker.

A large, large man with long flaming purple hair that was capable of touching the floor if it didn't move like fire with sharp glowing green eyes and a neutral, if a bit of a resting bitch face, expression on his face.

Comparatively, he was not dressed oddly. Nothing but a white compression shirt, grey sweatpants and a pair of black sandals. The only thing odd about it was the sword constantly strapped to his waist, though Tim ignored it when he saw the man using it to chop ingredients.

Fright, he called himself, and Tim never asked if it was his actual name or not. He was just glad someone came over as constantly as he does.

He doesn't know where the man goes at night, after making sure he's tucked into bed and asleep, but he never pried. Mostly because he wasn't supposed to know that, and he doesn't want Fright to catch onto the fact that he was constantly sneaking out at night either.

So they'll both keep their secrets.

===

Fright Knight was at a loss with himself.

His master, Pariah Dark, had been once again released from the Sarcophagus of Forever Sleep and he wasted no time to return to his side. Even with his previous betrayl.

The events that followed were unexpected.

His master did not continue his eons long war with life. Though it had long since turned silent with his imprisonment, it was still brewing under the current of 'peace' that the Ghost Zone fell into.

Fright Knight knew that well.

So, what exactly was he supposed to do when his master returned to his time as naught but a humble farmer and started to rebuild the bridge he had long burnt with the Master of Time?

He felt... conflicted.

Of course, reconnecting with the Ghost of Time was a good thing, and he has been subject to witness just how much passion they had for each other during days long past.

But his master picking up a life that was not one honed through blood was always an odd thing for him to experience. Two peas in a pod, as some would say they were.

War and Fear.

Where War went, Fear followed. Rivers of flowing blood with storms of fear promised was something too tempting for him to resist.

Fear was a sword, and he was War's blade.

So it was not something easy for him to adjust to when War settled down into peace and sought prosperity instead of his namesake. Of course, he, as always, adjusted regardless of the situation and followed his master in his newest endeavor.

It was much harder to preserve a life, than it was to end it. They both came to realize. On his master's part, farming was something he pondered over and donned for a brief time eons ago, the new methods of today clashing wildly with what little he knew of the activity before War sung to him again. For Fright Knight, he had not a single nail's worth of experience in the act, never having had an interest like War did and as such, never learned.

It felt rather odd to use his blade to cut gifts from the land, but if he replaced them with images of enemies long since snuffed, it wasn't exactly hard.

He could not stay there for long; however, it was just too... different, from what he was used to. The Ghost King knew this and told him he was free to be left to his own devices so long as it did not affect the rules the Master of Time had set for them.

Or rather, War. But as Fear was in his service, he was not exactly exempt from said constraints, either.

So he wandered, keeping to his 'human' persona he was told to set for himself here. He was thankful that these beings called Meta's existed as no one gave him more than a second glance.

Though if that was more something to do with his height he did not know.

He came upon a city, one of shadows and filled with curses in numbers that even made him pause in slight bafflement. Lady Gotham, the city's spirit, brushed against him as soon as he stepped foot within her haunt, and it did not take long for them to reach and accord.

Fear was allowed to stay, so long as he did not do anything she did not permit. He was fine with said rules, after all, what was another constraint compared to those set by Time itself?

He had a favorable view of this city, just the ambient fear alone made it worth stepping inside. It was better than War's attempt at peace, though it was nothing due to the being itself he was just... used to being surrounded by fear.

Then he met a human child by the name of Timothy Drake. A meeting by chance and nothing else, but he did need something to do by Lady Gotham's suggestion.

So he became the boy's 'caretaker' though if he were a good one was something he could not comment on.

He did not need sleep, his new ward did, so when night fell, he always stepped out of the city to go back to his master and reappeared the next morning.

The thing about his new master's attempt at peace, was that he was quite willing to give away the gifts he received from the land. Which was helpful, considering he had no idea how to acquire money in this new age.

[14dayswithyou]

[REDACTED] NSFW Alphabet

🔞 18+ CONTENT! MINORS: DO NOT INTERACT! 🔞 Ren's version can be found here!!

A = Aftercare (what they're like after sex)

[REDACTED] will usually part with a kiss before cleaning you up with a damp cloth or towel — or, if they were a bit rougher than usual, they'll draw you a bath with all your favourite scents instead.

B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner's)

He will forever be a tummy and thigh guy until my dying breath. [REDACTED] loves the feeling of you in his arms, so they'll often find themselves absentmindedly running their fingers up and down your thighs or just pulling you closer by your stomach and giving a soft squeeze. [REDACTED] might also favour your hands too, since he's a really big hand-holder and palm kisser. I don't think he'd have a favourite body part on himself, though he does subconsciously enjoy it when you compliment his eyes. It boosts their self-esteem and makes them feel attractive for once. (In regards to their real self!!)

C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)

Similar to his Ren counterpart, [REDACTED]'s cum is very thick and tastes somewhat salty. They enjoy the thought of filling you up and watching it slowly ooze out, and if you can manage to pry it out of him, [REDACTED] might even tell you about how it's always been one of his fantasies to have his cum still inside you while you go about your day. They secretly enjoy knowing that a part of him still lingers on you — as nasty as it might sound.

D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

I already mentioned it in Ren's NSFW alphabet, but he has an entire 4TB harddrive full of photos of you. Most are innocent and harmless, but others are... not so much. [REDACTED] often likes to look at them and fantasise about what it'd be like to help you through those lonely and intimate moments you spend between your sheets.

E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they're doing?)

[REDACTED] had zero experience prior to sleeping with you, though he does have some idea of what to do. [REDACTED] is much more forward and honest about what he wants (compared to his "Ren"/Haruko persona), so you can expect him to be less timid and shy when he ruts into you for the first time. "Never done this before... 'M glad I get to experience this with you. Can I... put it in now? Or d'you need more time?"

F = Favorite position (this goes without saying)

Anything that involves facing you and entwining your hands. [REDACTED] is big on watching your reactions to see what you like and respond well to.

G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)

He's definitely a lot more casual in bed, but I wouldn't call it goofy or anything. He'll go along with any jokes you make, and will even respond with his own if it fits the situation. But other than that, [REDACTED] tends to keep the moment tender and intimate.

H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)

His happy trail is very faint and matches the dark, black hair on his head. [REDACTED] also keeps himself moderately groomed, but if you want him to shave down there, they're happy to oblige.

I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)

Extremely intimate. They are always holding your hand, maintaining eye contact, and constantly praising you for how good you feel and how much he adores you. [REDACTED] might not light candles or set the mood with music, but he makes up for it by showering you with love and affection.

J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon)

Likes to jack off whenever you do, just so he can time his strokes with your own hand. Otherwise, if the need ever arises, they'll simply seek you out and ask if you're in the mood to help him out.

K = Kink (one or more of their kinks)

They have a maaaaassive praise kink (giving, but also... he subconsciously enjoys receiving it as well), biting/marking kink, and breeding kink. I wouldn't say [REDACTED] has an exhibitionism kink or anything — but he is down for anything if you initiate it in public.

L = Location (favorite places to do the do)

The hood of Teo's car, Leon's bed, Jae's couch, Violet's gaming desk, Elanor's reception counter, Conan's favourite bookshelf, inside the changing rooms of Kiara's boutique, the staircase in Olivia's souvenir shop, during a phone call with Moth— oh, and on Angel's hardwood floor, I guess /silly

M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)

While they would never force themselves onto you, you could quite literally bat your eyelashes in [REDACTED]'s direction and he'll be rearing to go. Try pulling them in by their belt or sucking on their collarbone if you want to be (carefully) thrown on the nearest flat surface and be fucked within an inch of your life.

N = No (something they wouldn't do, turn offs)

Threesomes (or more), cuckolding, or anything that physically involves others outside of [REDACTED] and you. Anything that has to do with DDLG/LB or ageplay is also a massive turn-off for them.

O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)

He's a biiiiiiig fat service top/pleasure dom at his core, so you know [REDACTED] is all about giving you pleasure. They're more than happy to spend the rest of their days between your thighs, and [REDACTED] could honestly cum hands-free purely from watching you unravel on his tongue. Your pleasure is his pleasure as well.

P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)

Typically, it starts out gentle and intimate — but the more [REDACTED] slowly unravels over time, the harder and rougher he'll get. Things like throwing your legs over his shoulder, gently biting your neck, gripping your hips and using you like a personal fleshlight, bucking into you with reckless abandon, etc. Obviously, nothing that would cause noticeable pain — but it's certainly different from how Ren would usually treat you in the bedroom. 

Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)

They don't mind quickies, but [REDACTED] will always prefer to take their time with you and shower you with all the love and affection they have. He doesn't want to rush your pleasure (and he likes to give you more than one orgasm per tryst), which can prove challenging to do if it's just a quickie. With that being said, they're all for being dragged away to a storage closet for some... fun before work!

R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)

Please ask him to go down on you while you're manning the front desk :( He lives for the thrill of it. [REDACTED] is down for almost anything — so long as it doesn't put you at risk.

S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)

At the start of the relationship, they might only last one or two rounds due to their inexperience. But as time progresses, he'll slowly start to get better. But it's soooo hard for [REDACTED] to focus when you're right there in front of him; splayed out perfectly on his bed and letting him bury himself deep inside your warmth, all while you— Aaaaand... Yeah, he's already spent and snoozing.

T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)

Prior to sleeping with you for the first time, [REDACTED] owned a vibrator, butt plug and fleshlight, which he would use whenever you'd pleasure yourself on lonely nights. They'd prefer not to use any toys on you as it comes across like you're not satisfied with his own hands, fingers, mouth, and tongue — but you could honestly convince [REDACTED] otherwise if you play your cards right.

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

He is a complete tease compared to his "Ren"/Haruko counterpart. They will whisper absolute filth into your ear while slipping their hands between your bodies and playing with your sex — before pulling away and innocently asking what you need from him. "D'you want more? Y'gotta tell me, angel." / "That feel good? Tell me where." / "I don't think y'can take all of me, angel. You're practically stuffed full already." / "You're droolin'. Feels that good, huh? Right here?" / "If y'want me to go harder, y'gotta beg a little more. It's cute. You're s'fucking cute." / "Want my fingers too? Tell me where." / etc. you get the point lmao

V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)

[REDACTED] will babble incoherent words when they're lost in the sauce (lol), but other than that, you'll mainly get soft groans and harsh sighs most of the time. However, if [REDACTED] is bottoming/getting pegged; it turns into bratty moans instead. And if you squeeze his hand or bite his collarbones, you'll have them practically whining into your skin and begging you to do it again.

W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character)

Started crying when you said you loved him in bed for the first time. And sure, maybe he was getting his tears all over your shoulder — but he also gave you at least seven orgasms that night and a reason to take a day off from work.

X = X-ray (let's see what's going on under those clothes)

Packing an ~8 inch dick (~6 inches when soft), with a cute pink head to contrast the scary vibe of his Jacob's ladder piercings. Girthy enough that you can just barely wrap a hand around it, as well as pale enough to match the rest of his skin tone. Leaks a lot of precum and curves slightly when erect.

Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)

[REDACTED] has a high sex drive, but will only indulge in it when you want to. Sex is an afterthought to him, and he won't ever push you to do anything — plus, they're more than okay with rubbing one out in the bathroom to satisfy their urges. But if you're able (and willing) to match his sex drive, you can expect to do it at least two times a day.

Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

They will stay up and either play with your hair, trace their fingers across your skin, gently rub your back, or even indulge in pillow talk! It all depends on what you tend to do afterwards, which [REDACTED] will easily comply with. He might even stay up and just... lose himself in his thoughts because [REDACTED] finally has you in his arms, safe and sound — where you belong.

[iamespecter]

TADC OCs: "The Die Quartet"!

"Oh but Ziku, who are these very handsome die?"

Well I'm glad nobody asked, because that would ruin the joke!

The Die Quartet are OCs of mine that I created for TADC, and for what purpose? Well, they're the minds behind show's music!

Hidden just behind a corner or two, or four, These obliviously mischievous and enthusiastic quartet play whatever music they can, one that certainly matches the current "mood" of what the cast is going through. Meet Cuba, Dodeca, Tetra, and Octa, The Amazing Musical Performers, for The Amazing Digital Circus!

LORE AND BOUNDARIES UNDERNEATH THE CUT!

When the Circus was initially created, it was feeling too barren for a place that's meant to be "lively". And so, Caine went and copy-pasted himself four times, while replacing the heads with some die props he found on the floor, retexturing and adjusting their bodies, to fit their new roles.

A little bit of a code rewrite to make them able of producing any sounds all on their own to be musically intertwined, and the quartet was basically ready to go: but there's only one problem.

Caine completely forgot to remove the admin privileges from their code.

So once the four spawned, they immediately began floating around, dancing and creating the main theme for the circus, and did it all perfectly. So Caine decided that as long as they don't interfere with anything major in the circus and did their job as the musical minds behind the show/game's soundtracks, he doesn't really care about fixing this error and would rather let these four run rampant to create more songs.

Ever since then, the Die Quartet has been messing with every circus members, most of the time playing obnoxious music that fits the "current mood". You'll even see their canes dance to the tempo they've set, like some backup dancers.

Think of it like: You now have x4 Caines with dice heads, flying and snooping around, so that they can "improve the mood" with their music! Ain't that swell??

(But really, all they do is just annoy the Circus members just like Caine does, for the better or the worse. Probably the latter.)

Fun facts about the Die Quartet!

Even though they've all been created at the same time and share the features of a die, they do not consider themselves as "brothers", and only see one another as colleagues instead.

Their names are related to the type of their die: Tetra (yellow), Dodeca (purple), Cuba (red), and Octa (green).

Despite being reused assets of Caine himself, they have distinct personalities that separate them from each other: Tetra is more joyful and playful, Dodeca is a more dramatic/theatric and over the top, Cuba is the natural lead and more stern than anybody, and Octa is the more closed off of the gang but willing to provide his best.

Yet, they all still lack awareness of personal space and boundaries just like Caine, and WILL be intrusive towards anyone they set their sights on, with the intent of predicting their mood and setting the current situation perfectly in musical form. (ex. if a character is sneaking, all four will follow "cautiously" behind while one imitates/pulls out a tiny piano playing to the theme of "tip-toeing". You know, like a cartoon gag.)

Although they can perfectly imitate ANY sound or instrument imaginable, They'll still pull out a "physical" instrument if the gag calls for it.

BOUNDARIES!

You can pretty much draw fanart of them! In fact I would REALLY love to see it and I encourage it! Really, just don't claim them as your own, or steal their designs.

NSFW of them is accepted, but please keep in mind that I have an SFW blog. Which means THERE ARE MINORS. Show them to me privately instead, I'd still love to see it <3

While NSFW is accepted (privately), please make it a morally decent one, because I don't really wanna see some disgusting stuff. This pretty much includes: non-con, scat, etc.

Aside from that though, I hope you all enjoyed these four! I really love how they turned out, and would love to draw them more. I was initially hesitant on showing my TADC OCs because I don't think people would like 'em, but fuck it.

My boys, they deserve to be seen even if just by a few people on the internet.

[pshenyasstuff]

Headcanons for relationships with Billy Kid

This is my purely subjective opinion, you may disagree with me. I don't have enough content on this guy (i obsessed with him), so I decided to make it myself.

He's definitely the type of guy who is always ready to support his girlfriend like some kind of cheerleader like "THIS IS MY GIRLFRIEND!! TEAR THEM ALL UP, BEAUTY!"

Expect a lot of talk about his favorite show, he will show you absolutely every poster and figurine, tell you how he acquired it and the like

And of course he will call himself your Starlight Knight

His gifts are often like this.. random. You never expect what he can give. One time it's some kind of cute trinket, and the next time it's a weapon 😨 (of course so that his beloved can stand up for herself)

But he doesn't really mind if you're a pacifist or just don't want to hurt someone. He is always happy to protect you, while of course showing off in all sorts of ways. "Babe, are you watching? I did a great job on them, didn't I??"

He's as clingy as possible, I'm serious. He loves hugging so much that hugging at every meeting with him will be something ordinary for you. It's just one of his ways of expressing sympathy

I'm 100% sure he's styling his hair. Or they are always like that. In any case, they are as soft as possible.

I'm not sure if he feels the touch. Let's assume that he feels it quite a bit

Despite this, he always tries to count the power to touch you

Oh yes, he definitely likes to carry his beloved on his arms, back and shoulders. He especially likes to walk around the city like this or run away from enemies with you, because he is an cyborg, much faster than your human legs, just let him treat you like his lady :D

The poor guy is sometimes so upset because he doesn't have lips. I mean, how can he then give his beloved more love?? In any case, he finds a way out of the situation and just rests his faceplate on the place where he wants to kiss you. Too cute

He definitely giggles stupidly when you initiate all this romantic stuff. Did you kiss him yourself? I swear, he lifts one leg like a girl and can't stop giggling in love

His nicknames are so sweet to you, sometimes banal, but it's cute. (Lady, sweetheart, princess, love of my life, beloved)

Each of your mornings together will begin with his speech. He will absolutely always wake up earlier, if he is sleeping at all, of course. Let's say it goes into sleep mode for a set time. "Yo, yo, yo, wake up, sleepyhead!"

Cooking? No, and again no, bro does not know how to cook, he buys you ready-made food, because he does not need it himself

He always likes to make you laugh, he is infinitely glad to see you happy :)

He definitely likes the idea of paired things. Even the bracelet you gave him will always be worn (until he loses it)

You rarely quarrel, I think, but if it happens, he always apologizes first

Don't give him a plant or a pet, they'll just die 😭

He likes to sing for you, even if it's not quite perfect and the ears of others wither from his singing

He will immediately ask to exchange numbers or social networks. What for? To send you his photos and silly messages if you are not around, of course. He definitely uses a lot of emojis

He likes to arrange a movie night with you. Of course, you'll be watching mostly his favorite show. He watches it so often that at one point he will just say lines along with the characters

He likes to lie on your lap at such moments or just hold hands, because it's romantic in his understanding

Thanks for reading <3

[luceafarul-de-dimineata]

How the kings would react to the shipping of them and MC

Satan

He was hanging out with his nobles, just talking gossip like normal people

But Paimon was just staying on his phone through half the conversations

"Paimon! What's so important that you're not interested in seing Sitri's baby pictures?"

Sitri was dying in the corner while Zagan was rubbing his back

Paimon takes his eyes out of his phone and giggles.

"Oh, I was just arguing with some people onlineeee"

Satan puts down the pictures of baby Sitri on the table (which Astaroth swiftly takes for himself. This will make such great blackmail material) and sits next to Paimon curiously.

"What are these dumpass arguing about now? Don't tell me Leraye started sending death threats to Barbatos over the weather again."

"Noooooo, it's better than thaaaaat. People are arguing about who the child of Solomon would dateeeee"

Satan takes Paimon's phone and starts to scroll through the comversations.

"And I'm winning, right? I mean MC has a pact with me, I was the first to meet them, it's obvious that I'm the one they'll choose"

"I know, riiiiiight?"

Satan would become the most active person in the shipping forum, just spamming it with pictures of him and MC

It's a way to assert his dominance over the whole thing.

Gamigin almost started a war between Paradise Lost and Gehenna when he started insulting Satan under his photos of MC

Mod Jjok had to work overtime to stop the harassment everyone in Gehenna was throwing at Gamigin for that

Lucifer had to send a formal apologise on behalf of his son to stop the situation from escalating further.

Mammon

Recently Eligos asked him to try on different fashion styles

At some point Mammon asks Eligos what this is all about

"The child of Solomon mentioned that they are interested in gothic fashion, so I'm trying to see what clothing would fit you and abide by goth fashion rules."

Mammon chuckles and ruffles Eligos' hair before telling him that he is already to his master's liking

"But there are a lot of people that claim that MC would be more interested in the other kings. We can't have that! Just yesterday Amon was bragging that MC and Beelzebub went on a date!"

"I'm glad they had fun with Beelzebub, but Beelzebub is mine and I am MC's. They can have fun with anyone they please."

Eligos' jaw drops to the floor. He gets flashbacks of all the arguments he had online about this and how he bought bots to mass report any Mammon x Mc slander

Eligos constantly tries to convince Mammon that the shipping wars are a big but Mammon doesn't really care.

At most he sends pictures of him and MC cuddling to Satan to spite him like all good friends do with eachother.

Leviathan

Leviathan is a lurker through the forums

It's where he got most of his information about you before kidnapping you

Probably reports all posts that aren't for the ship with him and you for false information

He would constantly post pictures of you and him doing mundane things with captions like "Living life perfectly", "Greatest day of my life", "Me and my wonderful significant other"

Makes everyone in Hades like his post and floud it with compliments

He'll make an account for you where he roleplays as a version of you that's madly innlove with you

The most likely to start an actual war between Hades and whatever ship is trending that morning

He sometimes doesn't sleep and just scrolls through the forums, refreshing constantly to see if you're having fun with someone else

King of all doxxers

No VPN will protect you from Leviathan's wrath

Beelzebub

Beelzebub was tied to his office chair with Bael glaring at him

"Go on, look at the complaint. What does it say?"

"I should take a vacation. I'm already burned out. You know, overworking is very bad for your health."

Bael glares at him with not an ounce of amusement behind his eyes

When Beelzebub skims through the files, something catches his attention

"Threat of war from Hades? I don't remember going to Hades recently, what happened?"

"While you were away having fun with the child of Solomon, Amon posted pictures of you two going at it on a forum. Next thing I know, his majesty Leviathan declared war on Avisos. I had to talk him out of it, but we now have to write a report about what happened and send it to the other kingdoms to tell them that it was resolved without any casualties."

Beelzebub was laughing his ass off while Bael was question his life choices

Beelzebub asks Amon to show him the forum which the younger devil does happily.

He sometimes go through it often, but he uses it as a way to find out where you are.

He's chiller about the whole thing, finding it kind of funny that so many people are so invested in your love life

Lucifer

Gamigin won't shut up about it.

If Lucifer took a shot every time Gamigin complained about the shipping wars, he'll dethrone Beelzebub as the king of Gluttuny

Lucifer is a softer lover, only being intense in more private parts of your relationship

So even getting him to kiss you in public (or outside the bedroom) is very hard.

This makes Gamigin's job as a shipper very hard

Lucifer finds the shipping war situation absurd

Why would anyone do this? What is it accompleshing? Why does he suddently get embargos from Hades or Gehenna after he goes on a date with you?

He'll probably have to sit Gamigin down and tell him to stop calling the other kings rude names just because they hang out with you.

It really depends on your reaction to everything as well

If you like being in the spot light, than he'll try to be more open with his affection, giving Gamigin more oportunities to gush about you online

If you want to keep your relationship more private, than he'll make all cameras fracture when pointing at the two of you

[gale-force-storm]

He refuses to fall for the first person to show him kindness. He may be feeling sorry for himself, but that's a bridge too far.

Even if they are beautiful. And kind to everyone, not just him. And brave. And clever. And strong. And they love animals, and reading. And they have a wry sense of humour that he adores.

He won't. He can't. Besides all else, this is decidedly not the time. A bomb in his chest and a worm in his head and a weight on his shoulders and a shame in his stomach and a shattered heart he's still trying to gather the pieces of. Desperately clinging to the cloak of his past, wrapping himself in his former confidence, pretending it hasn't been worn threadbare with time in isolation and eaten ragged by the moths of doubt and fear and past mistakes.

He fell from grace so far so fast, but he cannot beg affection off the first hand to offer him help up, even if it is the first time he's touched another person in months. Even if that hand did send a sudden warmth through him and feel so right in his own he could almost cry from it.

...This is getting out of hand.

He can just be friendly with them, surely. How does one make friends, again? Shared interests? He mostly just has the one, so he'll share what he can. They pick it up quickly, and the warm magic that surrounds them is a balm on his soul. Right up until they imagine kissing him, and his heart skips a beat. It can't be. It can't be. They can't want him back. It's not possible. And how, after it all, after everything, is he meant to resist the overwhelming temptation of being wanted?

They don't let up, either. Lingering glances. Warm smiles. All but propositioning him at the tiefling party. If there is a single positive thing to be said about his year of orb-imposed abstinence, it's that the willpower he had to build up and the practice denying himself were the only things that enabled him to decline their advances.

Well, that and the risk of blowing up the both of them, along with everyone else in or near the camp.

The warm smiles and lingering gazes and casual touches still continue, though.

This is fine. He's fine. He can't remember the last time he felt like this, someone cared for him like this, and he can't do a damn thing about it, but he's fine. Everything is fine. As fine as it can be, anyways, given everything else about the situation.

He supposes he should probably be more upset about Mystra's orders. At this point, though, it's hard to feel like it's anything besides a way out. A relief that he can be good for something. One more miserable experience, and then he's done with it, and all their problems are solved. There are worse things.

Except.

They're so angry about it. Everyone is, but them especially. Arguing with both him and Elminster the entire time, insisting there's another option. That they'll find or make one. Whatever they have to do to keep him around.

Gods help him, but he does want to stay with them. Stay for them.

He sleeps that night, and awakens with a jolt, a groan, and a realization. He's glad that prestidigitation exists to clean himself up without leaving his tent and risking the others' notice. His body had, apparently, caught up with certain implications before his brain. Though from what snippets of his dream he remembers, maybe it was only his waking mind that had been lagging behind.

He wants them, and he can finally have them. Can give them as much of himself as he's able, in the time he has left.

He had refused, at first, the idea of falling for the first person to show him kindness. And he hasn't. He's fallen for someone who is so much more that that. And he will not, cannot, die without letting them know. If he has to leave them, and he fears he will, then he will not leave them feeling unappreciated, or uncherished, or unloved. Not when he can finally embrace the full depth and breadth of what he feels for them. Has felt for them for what can't have been more than a tenday or two, but feels like a lifetime and a moment all at once.

He will not leave without showing them the full scope of his admiration and appreciation and sheer joy at their presence. The full scope of how impossibly deeply he already loves them. Not while he has any say in it.

[themisplaceddemigod]

Hi! I loved your smut fica, so I'm here to request another, hope that's ok. Jason Grace first time with reader ( maybe his first time of all) and he thinks he's expect to be in charge so when reader traces over he's very confused. Sorry for my English!!!

hi! I'm so glad to hear that :D that sounds cute, i love the idea of Jason being confused and not used to not being in command! hope you like it, and sorry it came out so late!

who's in charge?

Jason Grace x F!Reader

summary - the ask :)

warnings - SMUT, sexual content, idk what more I can say to warn MINORS to DNI!!

a/n: i know Percy's colour is blue but i didn't know what else to make Jason's colour. they'll just have to share lol

It was the night after you had returned from a quest. Jason always worried, he couldn't help it, but he'd heard some of what your quest involved and his concern was even greater this time around. So when you got back, he decided he wanted to show you just how much he missed you, even though he had never attempted anything this intimate with anyone else.

Frantic kisses along your neck while the son of Jupiter held you up against the wall of his cabin was not how you expected to be greeted, but you weren't complaining. Actually you weren't doing any speaking, since his kisses quickly devolved into sucking and biting on spots that had you moaning loudly while fisting his shirt in your hand. His hands found their way under yours, groping the soft flesh of your bare waist and sending waves of arousal through your body.

It usually never went further than this, because he was always too shy and you didn't want to push him, but when he started sliding your shirt off you realised that you two were finally going to do it, and you had to stop him just to make sure this was what he really wanted.

"Jason, are you sure?" Your breathing was uneven, arousal already evident in your voice.

"I'm sure," he confirmed before carrying you over to his bunk and dropping you onto his bed.

He crawled on top, completely removing your shirt before kissing you with a fervor you hadn't felt from him before. He kissed you like he hadn't seen you in months, and it wasn't long before his tongue was invading your mouth and sending pleasurable shivers down your spine. You moaned into his mouth, hands coming up to grab the back of his neck and tangle in his hair as your body arched up against him, your hips moving on their own as they rocked against his. You were awarded with a low groan, before his hands travelled south and groped your ass, making you gasp and moan even louder.

But you were getting impatient now, so you took matters into your own hands and pushed him off you, switching so that you now straddled him on the bed while he was on his back. You hurriedly slipped his shirt off and tossed it aside, leaning down to kiss him again as you struggled with the zipper of his jeans. As your tongues wrestled for dominance, you grabbed his bulge with one hand and squeezed, causing him to elicit a loud moan that only turned you on more. Finally getting his pants off, you sat up to undo your own and left both of you in just your underwear, and Jason with a stunned look on his face.

"What?" You frowned. "Is something wrong?"

"No! No, it's just..." His cheeks turned pink, "I, uh, I thought I would have more control of this situation. But now I have no idea what to do, I know it's stupid."

"It's not stupid," you laughed, then smirked, "I think it's cute." Then you proceeded to remove his boxers, causing him to swallow thickly as you teasingly lowered your face towards his achingly hard - and big - dick, "I want to see submissive Jason Grace."

His face burned at your comment, and at the position of your face, but as he opened his mouth to say something you dove right in. Taking as much of his length into your mouth as you could, you didn't give him a chance to get used to the new sensation before your tongue was running all over, licking and sucking every inch you could reach. You moaned around his cock as you sucked him off, soaking your panties at how good he tasted and loving the pleasured moans and groans you were getting from him.

"Fuck!" He cursed, involuntarily bucking his hips and thrusting his large dick further down your throat.

Your gag only turned him on further, and soon he was rocking his hips against your face, fucking your mouth more roughly than you expected, but you loved it. Especially when his hands found your hair, and he started to pull - you went insane. He was losing it fast at how good it felt to have your mouth wrapped around his dick, your tongue working wonders and edging him towards his first ever orgasm. A few minutes later you felt he was about to cum, and pulled away from his dick, only to earn a whine - yes, a first ever whine from the son of Jupiter.

"You'll get to cum baby, don't worry," you cooed as you sat up and inched forward, aligning your entrance with his tip.

To describe his feelings would be almost impossible. Jason wasn't sure what he was feeling between the confusion and the ecstasy, but you were being so hot right now he didn't want to stop you. He wasn't used to this, having someone dominate him, but he figured if it was you dominating him during sex, then he liked it. A lot.

"You okay?" You giggled as you grabbed his saliva-coated dick and started pumping it, causing him to groan. "You look confused."

"How do I...you know...in this position?" He blushed, flustered and embarrassed by his own question. "I thought, well, I thought I would be on top."

"I'll show you."

Anything he was going to say died in his throat after you pushed his tip in and sunk down on his cock, inch by inch. The feeling of your warm, wet walls engulfing his throbbing member sent waves of pleasure through him and his jaw dropped as he let out the loudest moan you'd heard from him yet.

"Fuck!"

You were in heaven yourself, eyes fluttering as you took him in, mouth rounding to form an 'o' as he stretched you out. He was bigger than you'd expected, and much bigger than anyone you'd ever taken before. You moaned loudly when your hips finally met his, and his hands tightened on your waist as you both got used to the feeling of him being sheathed deep inside you.

"Feels so good..." He groaned, involuntarily bucking his hips and making you gasp and cry out at the movement.

You took that as a sign that he was ready and started to move up and down, going slowly at first since this was his first time. But as his moans got louder and his breathing got heavier and shakier, you moved faster, bouncing yourself on his cock at a speed that had both your eyes rolling to the back of your heads. Your hands found his shoulders to steady your body as you rode him, skin slapping against skin while you bit your lip hard from the sheer pleasure of having his thick length ramming into you with every hard slam of your hips. Jason's head rolled back, the feeling euphoric. His fingers dug into the skin of your waist, probably leaving behind marks but you didn't care.

"Faster," he moaned - almost choked - out. "Go faster, please..."

You obliged, rising up and slamming down on him quicker and rougher, the faster pace eliciting louder moans from both of you. You reached down to grab his hands and guided them up to your chest, making him grab and grope the fatty flesh of your breasts. Your head tilted back at the feeling, moans growing louder and lewder at the combination of pleasure from both areas. It wasn't long before Jason's hips were bucking up into yours on their own, making you cry out in ecstasy as his hands massaged and squeezed your tits.

"Fuck, fuck, fuck!" You cursed, riding him harder and picking the pace up even more as you felt your orgasm starting to build.

Jason was getting close too, unable to hold it off for much longer with the way your soft, gummy walls were clenching around his dick. His hips had already started acting on their own, rocking against yours so hard he feared he might bruise you, but you didn't seem to mind. In fact, it only spurred you on and the sound of your wet thrusts was driving the son of Jupiter insane, causing him to grip onto your breasts a little too tight. You gasped, then whined, and he swore the sound went straight to his dick because then he slamming up into you with the force of an ox, moving his hands further south to grip your ass again. As he squeezed, you whimpered and cursed, trying to bounce yourself on his dick faster but failing due to your legs getting tired. So Jason picked up from there, using his grip on your ass to move you up and down on his length. For a while, the only sounds were heavy pants and moans, and skin slapping against skin.

Then there was a loud groan, and Jason quickly - but gently - pushed you off just in time for his cum to spill out, all over your lower stomach. When he looked down, he noticed his dick was covered in yours, and the sight had him throwing his head back with a groan.

"That's so hot."

You smiled and laid yourself next to him, kissing his shoulder, "Mhm, I agree. You are hot."

"But I said-"

"Shhh, go sleep."

[endless-ineffabilities]

sapphire-hearted (part one)

Aemond Targaryen x f!reader

The start to an angst-ridden little story, wherein the reader, Aemond's dearest friend (and clandestine love) learns of his apparent new paramour, Alys.

themes/warnings: angst, jealousy, fwb type situation, Aemond is kind of a clueless twat

series masterlist ▪︎ main masterlist

edit(!): this oneshot seems to have taken a life of its own, like most of my fics, quite unexpectedly! I've changed the title from (sapphire) blue heart to sapphire-hearted, and part two will be out in a few hours! is out now!

"Why do you not look at me?" He gently pries your face towards him with his free hand, as you both lie naked on his sheets, his arm wrapped around you. "Have I done something wrong?" he asks.

"Nothing, Aem." You shake your head, letting his hand fall.

He takes one deep breath. He knows you like the back of his hand; he knows something isn't right.

"You're not fooling me, gevie." Beautiful, he calls you, as you sit up and bring your knees to your chest. You feel the cold air on your back, and then, his fingers tracing patterns on your bare skin.

Gevie. You wonder if he calls Alys the same. After their rumoured trysts. After she is seen leaving his bedchambers. Has she lain among these very sheets herself, where you are now?

You and Aemond were not together, no. You were not betrothed. Your House was too lowly to allow you to wed a Targaryen prince. But he had said he was yours. Just yours.

How has that changed so quickly?

"Speak to me," he pleads. He sits up behind you, kissing the back of your neck. "You know I have my methods of making you do so. Shall I employ them?" You can hear the amusement in his voice, the assuredness.

You thought you loved it more than anything, but now it feels like some cruel jest.

You turn to face him directly. "Is she better than me?"

He leans back, fully aware of who you mean. "Hmm," he purses his lips. "Jealousy does not become you, it seems."

"I'm glad you think me amusing." You bite back, looking away.

"This is amusing. How can you be jealous of her?"

You aren't sure what to make of that question. Is he mocking you, and the justification of your envy? Who are you to him anyway? Just a friend, no?

"Aemond. I thought... that we..."

"You know what we are. How we are. Isn't it enough?"

"Not if I have to share you with some witch!" you rise from his bed, and wrap your cloak around yourself. "I've turned down the finest suitors, simply because you wished me to. Simply because you were jealous. Don't you think you owe me the same courtesy?"

His voice is colder when he responds, "What do you think I am doing with Alys, hmm? Do you think I enjoy having her grace my bedchambers, and have her clawing at me?" He stands too, towering over your stature. "I have never wanted to bed anyone other than you. What I am doing with her... what I have to do with her... It is for the good of the Seven Kingdoms."

"Spare me, Aemond." You swat his hands away, when he reaches for your arms. "Don't..." He tries again, much quicker this time, and he holds your forearms tightly against his bare chest.

"She has magic." There is a wild look in his eye when he says this, and it makes you uneasy. "She sees things, Alys. She can predict what the enemy's next move is, where they'll be. What I am doing with her, lying with her, is but a small price to pay."

"What if you don't lie with her? You don't have to..."

"She asks me to."

"You don't have to. You're the prince! She answers to you, not the other way around."

"I refused, of course, in the beginning." He holds your face gently in his hands now, trying to make you understand. "That did no good. She gave me nothing. I could have her tortured. But this will only serve to distance her even more from our cause."

"So, to get what you want... to hear her incredible visions and benefit from her magical spells, you have to fuck her? Very astute of you, Aemond."

"Careful, my love." He tilts his head, trying to work through your anger.

You use your palms on his chest to push him away. He only stumbles a little, the faint sound of his low growl reaching your ears.

"You know what I'll do?" you threaten, your cloak falling back to the floor as you wave your arms dramatically. "The next dashing Lord that asks for my hand, I'll take. It could be Lord Manderly's son or... Lord Beesbury's eldest boy has made an offer, too. I'll wed him, whoever he is, why not? Even if I don't love him, it will only be a small price to pay," you sneer, mirroring his words from before. "It is what's expected of me, after all. It is for the good of my House."

Aemond's jaw clenches in his rage. "Then I shall have him captured and quartered to pieces in the dungeons before he can even get the chance to - "

"No," you shake your head at his nonsense. "No, you would not. You would not do something like that to me. How would that be fair? You and I, we'll never marry. As it stands, you'd sooner wed your witch than I."

"I would marry you in a heartbeat." He moves closer now, desperation creeping in his voice. His lips meet yours in a haste. Wet and demanding. When you turn your head, he only continues kissing the side of your face. Then he stops, pressing his forehead to your temple. "You know this, my love. You have to know this. Alys is nothing compared to you. Without her, I might lose the war. But without you... I lose myself."

You nearly cave in at that, as you always do when it comes to Aemond. But now, you remind yourself to stand your ground.

"Then prove it to me," you whisper, and a stray tear falls down your cheek. "Do as I ask. Stop being with her."

Seconds pass. Aemond's mind races at the possible outcomes. His heart aches at the sight of your sadness, but he feels compelled to think of other things too.

The war. Defeating the Blacks. Easily gaining the upper hand through dark magic.

At the end of it all - and if he does what he does, it should all end very soon - he will still have you. He's sure of it.

You will always come back to him. You will understand.

"I cannot," he says, his words striking through your heart.

You feel numb all over, but you force yourself to step away from him, and hurriedly put your dress back on.

"My love, please..." He watches helplessly as you tie the strings of your skirts, preparing to leave.

"My prince," you cursty, when you've managed to put yourself together. "I am not certain when, but you're invited to honour us with your presence at my coming marriage ceremony."

"I'd sooner command Vhagar to burn Westeros to ashes."

"You mean, you'd sooner bask in the pleasures that only your witch can offer?" you laugh mirthlessly. "Of course."

You start walking away, determinedly. Ice has flooded your veins and your heart, turning you cold and blue. But you press on. The pain will have to wait for later.

"You'll come back to me," he calls after you.

"Oh, I wouldn't hold my breath, if I were you."

You slam the door behind you.

Angst!!! We all need this sometimes. I swear it riles me up so good, I almost wonder if something's messed up with my romantic ideals ....

.... who are we kidding? Of course there is. Because I would marry our one-eyed Vhagar-riding war terrorist in a heartbeat.

taglist open for an upcoming part!

[weirdly-specific-but-ok]

pt XVI good omens season 2 (still not traumatic) episode 3 EDINBURGH

HELLO IT'S ME IT'S THE OFFICIAL GOOD OMENS MASCOT WHY DO I STILL KEEP INTRODUCING MYSELF IDK. If you don't know who I am, thank God and Satan for their mercy and flee. Also, the day after I post this, I'll be watching the last three episodes on livestream for the first time so. You know. I'm hyped on the energy of this being my last day not enveloped in tears. Take the summary:

Before the episode starts, someone asks why Crowley said in the last episode that Aziraphale couldn't fall because look at him, all angelic when Crowley looked the same as starmaker. I reply that "Crowley thinks he deserved it, he sees Azi as something beautiful and untouched while he probably sees himself as idk marked in some way so god kicked him down."

I am told that I am learning too fast to weaponise the narrative to induce angst. So then I say oh, I go too fast for you. Tears ensue.

The episode begins! Everyone shrieks about Edinburgh, David Tennant, how it is their favourite episode, and SCOTTISH CROWLEY.

We open with lesbians being gay, and then Muriel enters as Inspector Constable! They are very sweet and very determined to do their job right, and they are adopted by Crowley and Aziraphale just like Jim.

Crowley sits on Aziraphale's chair's arm. The maggots all swoon.

Fine, I also swooned.

Aziraphale gaslight-gatekeep-girlboss-mansplain-manipulate-manwhores his way into getting Crowley to give him the Bentley keys (BOUNDARIES. BOUNDARIES.).

WHAT PLENTY OF USE DO BOTH OF YOU GET OUT OF THE BOOKSHOP?

The really ineffable plan is whatever the fuck was happening in Aziraphale's brain when he somehow went from London to Edinburgh via Loch Ness (check the map) and then proceeded to disguise himself as a detective who pretends to be a journalist.

Crowley slays in sleeve garters and a cardigan keeping house in the bookshop meanwhile, does not sell books, instead cleans with Jimbriel and periodically yeets book stacks into corners when distracted.

Aziraphale reads his old diary entries about Crowley, a (6000+) 13 year old with a crush.

MINISODE MINISODE. They are in Edinburgh during the mid 1800s. Victorian outfits, check. Scottish Crowley, check. Capitalist Karen Aziraphale, che-wait what.

Huh. Well. There's a wee bit of body snatchin' going on, to sell to doctors for medical research because there aren't enough murderers, and to make enough money to survive.

Aziraphale channels his inner capitalist judgemental Karen and ruins that plan, come on Aziraphale you have religious trauma but you're better than this, and long story short, Wee Morag dies after Aziraphale realises his error, her friend Elspeth has to sell her corpse for pennies, and is about to commit suicide with laudanum. Azi, oh god. I'm glad you underwent character development at least.

NOW CROWLEY HERE SLAYS. I KNOW THIS IS AZIRAPHALE'S PERSPECTIVE AND IS BIASED. BUT WITH THIS POV, CROWLEY SLAYS.

He calmly educates Aziraphale about how his whole "the poor have more opportunities and you shouldn't give them money or they'll lose the virtue of poverty" is absolute bullshit, and he does this understanding Aziraphale's situation and not losing his temper.

The framing. The framing of the shot when they see Wee Morag and Elspeth sitting down on a step and explaining their situation. Aziraphale stands above, bustling with righteousness, and judges them. Crowley sits down. He sits down next to them, rather than taking the high ground. He meets them where they are and empathises. It is the fact that he is fallen and damned that makes him behave really divine and sorry I wrote a whole hymn on him have it I'll stop rambling just know I love him.

I think his amusement is a facade so hell won't think he's genuinely being good. I think he's morally grey and incredibly brave and kind.

When Elspeth is bouta kill herself with the laudanum, Crowley grabs it and drinks it himself, and grows tiny and then huge, absolutely high off his head. David Tennant takes the opportunity to travel Scotland from east to west in terms of accent variety.

He gives us the good message of NO DYIN'. NO MORE DYIN'. IT'S NOT ON. And then forces Aziraphale (who doesn't want to ruin her virtuous poverty) to give the girl all the guineas he has in his pocket, and tells her to go off and start a farm or something. BUT NOT JUST PRETENDY GOOD, BE PROPERLY GOOD.

He then gets pulled into hell. To be punished for this. Aziraphale is frightened and heartbroken for him, looking around desperately, and we find out that Crowley didn't meet him for a while after. And later he wanted holy water. To protect himself? He got punished by hell. For how long? The whole month in between the incident and the diary entry? There can't be anyone better at punishment and cruelty than hell.

Sorry I'm just screaming here.

Never mind fuck I started this summary really happy and bouncy and listening to a dance playlist. Dionysus by BTS and Italian pop is still playing and now I'm crying.

Is this the natural progression. Fuck I'm crying. Sorry guys something else happens with Aziraphale politely talking to a phone and Crowley smiling really beautifully while unsuccessfully trying to manipulate two lesbians into a relationship and something about a visit I don't care everyone's being morally dubious as usual and then lovely Scottish music outro I CAN'T FUCKING ELABORATE I'M SITTING HERE CRYING OVER CROWLEY.

right summary done, time to go sob, lmao i thought i wouldn't cry today over good omens HAHAHAHA still not traumatic eh HAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

[mcflymemes]

BULLET TRAIN (2022) PROMPTS *  assorted dialogue from the film, adjust as necessary

if you mention thomas the tank engine one more time, i'm gonna shoot you in the fucking face.

would you describe me as someone who lives in perpetual anxiety?

well, you also have a shoot-able face.

you never know what horrible fate your bad luck has saved you from.

thank you for taking the job on such short notice.

you are getting the new and improved me.

i'm less reactive to situations, i'm more accepting of people's shortcomings.

you put peace out in the world, you get peace back.

i'm not even trying to kill people and someone dies.

i could live here. i like the atmosphere, the people are considerate.

i know i'm being judgmental. i need to work on that.

this train is bound for kyoto.

i'm gonna assume you didn't take the gun?

you know, i'm thinking of starting my own agency.

what am i snatching and/or grabbing?

shit, i think i dropped my ticket.

you're bleeding.

who the fuck did i kill?

i think they'll notice the childish code names first.

when was the last time you ate a lemon meringue pie?

there's always a catch.

you idiots work for my father?

you ever watch thomas the tank engine? everything i learned about people i learned from thomas.

i want to strangle you now.

why do you always bring swords?

that wasn't our fault.

hey, listen, i'm just gonna get off at the next stop.

where's the briefcase?

he doesn't need a reason to kill people like you.

you're going to want to hear the whole story, or you'll be very, very sorry.

why do i even bother forwarding you the briefings?

no one really knows the truth.

we are... fucked.

find me the son of a bitch who did this.

can we just take a time out here? talk this out?

why does that sound so familiar?

the guy who stabbed me. i spilled wine on his suit.

one of them is walking towards me right now.

why are we whispering?

your orders were to stay on the train.

can i please do my job now?

shove that fucking hat up your fucking asshole.

there's a gun underneath this table pointed right at you.

i'm just fucking with you.

real quick... every day is a fucking headache with you, innit?

you're alive, i'm alive, everyone's happy.

i just want to get off this train, go see a zen garden and some shit, you know?

there's another body here.

this guy's like criss fucking angel. he pops up everywhere.

unlike you, i'm a professional.

you shoot first and come up with the answers later.

are you hiding in a bathroom?

i knew my luck would rub off on you.

you're really proud of yourself, aren't you?

for what it's worth, you seem like a right fucking asshole and i'm glad you're gonna fucking die with me.

you proved you're smarter than everyone.

am i dreaming?

i don't know how to use a gun.

i'm glad you enjoyed the performance.

i'm mansplaining. i'm mansplaining again.

you want a blanket? you want me to hold your hand?

you have been lying to me, my friend.

i never forget a face.

i'm so happy to see you. please help me.

make sure you do something that brings you peace, 'cause everything else is a pain in the ass.

fate for me is just another word for bad luck.

why are you motherfuckers using metaphors?

i'm gonna buy us some time.

i built myself up from the nothing you gave me.

i came here to kill you.

oh shit. something's happening.

i'm sorry i shot you twice.

we're almost there. you just need to get up.

what's happening to your face? are you crying?

[cloakedsparrow]

Bat Family 'Bruce is Tim's biological parent' AU Idea #1

Wherein Jack Drake: a) Regularly tags along on archaeological digs despite not being an archaeologist. b) Commonly smuggles home archaeological finds despite that not being legal. c) Does not believe in curses, hauntings, or any mythology despite the world that he lives in being populated with *gestures at comics* all that.

As a result, Jack is like a magnet for cursed objects and keeps smuggling the damned things home.

The first time little Timmy suspects this is happening, he knows his dad won't respond well to him suggesting the most recent package he sent home is haunted. He knows he'll respond even worse if he tries to get anyone else involved. So he sends his mom a private email explaining what's going on. Janet replies that he's right to be suspicious, that this has absolutely happened before, and that he was right to contact her. She tells him she's sending over a friend who can help and gives him a password that she'll tell the friend so he knows it's okay to let him in the house.

John Constantine shows up within the hour. Tim is certain he didn't drive there (the alert that someone passed through the gates never went off and no one put in a code to open them) but there is a cursed object in his house and John knew the password Janet gave him, so he's mostly just happy to have an adult there to handle the situation. Even if a somewhat bizarre adult.

John takes care of the cursed object and is impressed that Tim reacted to it much faster than most do. He gives Tim his card with instructions to call him if anything like what was happening starts to happen again or if anything else weird starts happening after his father has been to any digs or sent home any strange packages.

As Jack is the aforementioned cursed object magnet, Tim ends up calling John fairly often for someone who doesn't actively work with the occult and is, in fact, a child. John keeps praising him for catching on as quick as he does and giving him information to catch onto other types of mystical/magical wickedness. Tim gets really good at recognizing when magic/curses/spirits are at play.

Then, Janet dies and Jack goes into a coma. Tim is fostered by Bruce for a year and a half and doesn't have to worry about curses or haunted objects for all that time. When they do come across something of the occult, Bruce/Batman has his own contacts, so there was never a reason for Tim to bring any of it up.

Then, the events of Identity Crisis/Crisis of Conscience occur, and Bruce doesn't want to talk to Zatanna (his usual mystic go-to) if it can be helped. He doesn't want to call in anyone connected to most of the Justice League if it can be helped.

So when they come across a cursed object, Tim immediately identifies it and tells Bruce not to worry, he knows a guy who can handle it. The man knows his civilian identity, so they'll have to pretend Bruce bought the object as part of an action or estate sale lot.

John comes and handles it. Before he leaves he comments that he's glad Tim's biological father finally decided to step up and that Bruce better take good care of the boy.

When Tim explains that Bruce isn't his father, the look on John's face clearly shows that he's trying to figure out how to back-step, but not in the expected way. More in the 'I let on information i wasn't supposed to' way.

Which is how Bruce and Tim end up running a paternity test in the Cave at four am.

Alfred and Dick are delighted by the results.

[Alternative ending: John pulls Bruce aside to let him know that Janet told him Jack wasn't Tim's father and that both he and Bruce were on the short list and he hadn't known Jack died or he'd have contacted him already. They have to wait to find out which of them is the lucky one. Either Bruce turns out to be the father and John just lets Tim know he can still call him whenever needed or it turns out John is the father and they decide Tim should still stay with Bruce but John has visitations. Also, Tim might have been showing signs of his Homo Magi heritage when he recognized all these cursed objects. John insists on teaching him to use his magic despite Bruce's unease with it.]

[kichiyosh1]

I love you! as my (boy)friend!

kabukimono (scaramouche) x reader

fluff! fluff! fluff! and teasing, will also be giving him the nickname kuni

Our sweet kabukimono is having an identity crisis in which he's torn between what role he should play.

"Wah! Why can't I be your boyfriend?!"

and there it is.

Kabukimono was a curious one, so it came as to no surprise to you when he started asking such questions.

"Is there a reason why you think you're my boyfriend?"

"uhm.." he tightened his hold on the lavender melons gathered in his arms, face dusted a light pink, but determination swirling in his eyes when he answered.

"Well! From books i've read, it's mentioned that when people start developing this feeling called... love, they'll end up together becoming a couple, isn't that what we are?"

He knew you reciprocated his feelings, you've made it very clear when you first initiated a kiss, his first kiss, a few weeks back.

BUT THE SIGNALS YOU WERE GIVING OUT WEREN'T CLEAR AT ALL.

"I love you a lot, you know," his face formed a pout, while you only smiled in response.

"awhhh, I love you a lot too! but best friends are also allowed to love each other though." If he ever had a heart, just know it was being stabbed over and over again by your words.

"B But I like— love you more than just a friend!"

"So you're saying since you want to be my boyfriend now, you don't want to be friends anymore? Are you ending our friendship, kuni?" the more you spoke, the more life was being sucked right out of him.

He was not prepared for that. Nobody told him that upgrading stages in relationships would mean ending one?! He valued your friendship more than anything in the world! but he can't possibly just stay as your 'just friend' when he has these feelings for you, right?

"I didn't know I had to pick one over the other! what law of nature says I can't be both?!"

"love, the nature of love, my darling kabukimono" you were on the brink of losing your composure, you had to suck in your teeth in order to not let out a laugh at how silly this situation was, and how adorably confused and panicked kuni looked.

Kabukimono made his points, but you were able to counter them in ways that had kuni flapping his arms up and down at a rapid pace, his sleeves following in his movement.

"No fair! this is just unfair!" you decided to end your little prank here, seeing how tears of frustration were about to break out of the dam in kuni's eyes.

"There, there. Tell you what, why don't we break the rules just this one time, okay?" You then clasp his hands in yours, leaning in to give him a light peck on the lips as to not startle him.

Oh, how he'd break many more rules if it meant he could have you like this

"With this kiss, it's sealed that you're now officially my boyfriend, but you'll still be my number one best friend in the whole of teyvat."

His eyes widened for a few seconds, which was quickly replaced by him covering his face with his sleeves, but the red of his ears couldn't hide what he was actually feeling.

"In that case, I'm glad" you can see the tiny gap between his sleeves, and under it was a grinning kabukimono, the red on his face never fading if not only increasing more into a darker shade.

"So, what would it take for me to be called your husband?"

[wonton4rang]

hihi i love your post and i see your request are open so of you dont mind can you do a bonedo reaction of them getting jealous or smth along those lines, and its completely up to you whether its nsfw or sfw

thank you !!:)

hiiii~ tysm for giving me the chance, i'm glad you like it. and ofc I'd be more than happy to do thisssss. I'll do it nsfw because OH MY GOSH HEAR ME OUT ‼️‼️ this came out quicker than i thought 😭

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Stop it ¡!

pairing: bnd legal line x reader.

warnings: +18, jealousy (duh), toxic behaviour, some smut, usage of the boy's real names.

summary: bnd legal line getting jealous over things and how i think they'll act in those situations.

note: if you find any typos, feel free to let me know so i can correct them~

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sungho;

he would get jealous over things that you couldn't even imagine, he wouldn't get jealous a lot tho, i see him as a very mature and confident person so if you guys are as in love as it appears to be he wouldn't mind.

but when he sees you're laughing way too much with jaehyun, touching his arm and him touching your hands while you both share a space in the small sofa, it makes him feel kinda pressured, his chest feeling heavy and an uncomfortable expression landing on his face.

"sungho, baby, everything okay?"

"yeah, it's just... what were you talking about with jaehyun earlier?"

"we were just joking, why? did i say something that upset you?"

"no, i... i just didn't like to see you being so close with him" you just looked at him in silence and he shaked his head before adding "i guess i was jealous that he was making you laugh so much"

"baby, you make me laugh too"

"i didn't like the way he held your hands and you let him"

"i'm sorry, it won't happen again if it makes you uncomfortable. but... you do know that i only like you, right? that you are the only one for me, right?"

and he would just shyly smile and nod before giving you a candid kiss, laying you down in bed to make love to you and remind you who was the only one for you.

riwoo;

sanghyeok is such a shy boy but he is also very playful when he feels comfortable so i definitely see him playing around with you and the boys, probably at the field or in a pool, laughing and having the best time of his life until he sees sungho playing a little bit too close to you, holding your waist and dodging balls or stopping the boys from splashing water at your face.

he would stop laughing right away, remaining silent for the rest of the afternoon, you didn't even notice because you were soooo busy with the other boys.

you would approach him but he wouldn't even look at you when you called his name, mumbling a soft "go talk to the boys about it" you honestly laughed at how cute he looked being this jealous, you cupped his face and kissed his lips without asking for permission, his cheeks flushing at that very instant.

"what are you doing?"

"can't i kiss my boyfriend?"

"you were ignoring me all day"

"i was not... at least not intentionally, look, hyeok-ah, i'm sorry, okay? can you forgive me this time?" and he would simply nod, holding your hand to go back into the group, they already knew what happened and apologized too for the misunderstanding.

the afternoon went by as normal but you could catch him glancing at you and holding your hand every time he had the chance.

jaehyun;

i am soooo sorry but he wouldn't stfu and watch, he is definitely coming up to you and the boy flirting the shit out of you to get you away from him.

"who's this? you know him?" when you denied with your head and your hands gripped his shirt he understood what was going on, giving the dude a glance before saying "isn't it obvious this is your sign out? get the fuck away from my girlfriend, man"

and you just KNOW that he is NOT leaving your side for the rest of the night, not even for ONE second, for nothing. he even took you to the bathroom with him, excusing himself with a "it's nothing you haven't seen before" and that painfully hot grin of his.

"i don't even know how he thought he got a shot with you" he would say once y'all are back at home, laying between your legs while he softly traced lines in your skin. "he should see how down bad you are for me" and you just laughed because he was right, you didn't have eyes for anyone else.

taesan;

RUN. literally just run. taesan is not a jealous person i'm afraid, he could be picky, yes, he could want something you have (like a game or something), yes. he could play around and pout over little things but he would never really get mad or jealous.

but god forbids the day he does, his hair is covering most of his forehead and yet you can see his eyebrows frowned and his eyes staring at the hand that was resting in your thigh. he himself didn't understand why he was feeling that way, intimidated, threatened and full of rage, it was leehan after all, it was his friend who was laughing with you, touching your thighs with soft palms when he laughed and looking down the opening of your dress by instinct.

yeah, that was not going to work.

that's why taesan stood up and walked to you, his voice sounding lower than usual when he said "stand up, we are leaving" you did not know what was happening but you were not going to go against him either. "were you having fun? having his hands all over you like you don't have me, huh?"

"i don't-"

"don't talk back, i don't wanna hear it"

"but i-"

"i bet he is thinking about you tonight, about how pretty you look in this dress" his hand drawed the curve of your waist. "how soft your hair is" this time he got his other hand to softly touch your hair. "and how good you smell" his face got lost in your neck and he just fucked the shit out of you afterwards, constantly letting you know that you were his.

only to be soooo ashamed the morning after about everything he said and did, but oh well, at least he got off.

leehan;

he would be jealous of everything, everyone and anything, because he could, he wanted and yeah. but it was mostly joking, he would be "jokingly jealous" all the time.

so the day he actually got jealous you didn't even realize it until it was too late. he kept telling you that he didn't like the way riwoo talked to you, that you guys were dancing too close to each other and that he didn't feel comfortable with it.

but again, you thought he was joking, why would he be for real if you always danced with riwoo? well, today was the day he didn't like it, he hated the way riwoo touched you and he knew that riwoo had nothing for you, it was just the dance and he did it professionally, then why?

"are you seriously mad?" you finally asked after he ignored you since you got home, just sitting by his fishtank and chewing some gum. "leehan, i'm talking to you"

"then don't"

"can you talk to me, please?"

"are you going to listen this time?" you just nodded and left out a sign when he got close to you. "i really dislike that dance, i hope that you can change it because i don't want you to dance with someone else like that"

"it's been the same dance since two weeks ago, hannie, what are you saying?"

"you said you'll listen"

"and i am but that's just-"

"you would look so good with your mouth around my cock instead of talking back like a bitch" well damn.

the deal was sealed, the dance was changed, riwoo and you made a different choreography and your lips were sucking him off for the rest of the night, he fucking you in missionary later just so he could stare at your eyes and kiss your lips when he came inside, mumbling how good you were for him. just for him.

[asuyaka]

Hear me out on this,

HCS for Misa and L from Death Note(separately) with a detective s/o who's like Ranpo from Bougon Stray Dogs✋

★ - eeeee!!! Deathnote req!! (๑>ᴗ<๑)!!

☆ - Misa Amane & L Lawliet x Super Detective! Reader!

She loves you so much, but goodness (!!!) your smarts are going to be the death of her (literally and figuratively) 

It’s a miracle how you haven’t found out she’s the Second Kira (you have, but you’re conflicted if you should rat out your girlfriend for the sake of justice) but she’s glad!

She is so confused about your addiction to snacks because ???? why do you need that much?

She’s an idol, so she has money to back you up — not all the time, but most of the time she lets you run free. She always reminds you that too many snacks aren’t healthy, but you need snacks to function, so it goes from one ear and out the other.

She tries her best not to let you and Light meet, as much as Kira needs you dead for interefering with his plans, she can’t bring herself to give you —her boyfriend who she loves so much despite your weird snack obsession— to the man who savd her life, no matter how grateful she is for that.

"Misa....!" You groan, lying down on a couch as you watch someone put makeup on her for her next photoshoot. 

You've run out of cases that interest you, you're hungry, and you need something to do other than look at your perfect, amazing, charming, beautiful, pretty, stunning, breathtaking, gorgeous, captivating, alluring, attractive girlfriend.

You watch her in the mirror as the person places lipstick on her. Her light-brown eyes catch yours as she sends you a playful wink.

...Yeah, you lied, you could definitely keep staring at her more. 

Your thoughts wander to the Kira case. You've solved it already, despite the dead ends and plot twists Ligh— Kira kept throwing at you, but you can't find it in yourself to turn it in to the police.

You're smart (obviously). If you turn in Light, Misa will become a prime suspect for the Second Kira, they'll arrest her under suspicion, and she'll eventually break or Light will manipulate her situation in a way so that they'll free him and keep Misa. 

You still don't know how they kill, it's one of the few plot holes that bug you at night, but you're on the track to figure that out— you hope so at least.

Misa's face is above yours, a small smile on her face as she kisses your cheek. "I'll be done soon, then we can go out, okay?" 

Her smile is so warm. Even after dating for so long, it still brings butterflies in your stomach. "Yeah," you breathe out, hands squeezing Misa's slightly. "Have fun, okay? I love you."

Misa giggles—you love her laugh, it's airy and tugs a smile on your face every single damn time you hear it— squeezing your arm as she makes her way out of the room. "I love you too!"

Snack runs, snack runs, and did I already say snack runs?

The two top detectives are also lovers?? It sounds like the plot of a cheesy rom-com, but it is, in fact, the life of you and your beloved, sleep-deprived boyfriend!

You two work best when you're together. You don't even have to be touching (a lie) being in the same room working on cases is enough for the both of you.

Watari provides food (desserts and snacks, upon snacks, upon snacks) when you two are working on especially time-consuming cases.

Whenever you don't feel like working or the case you are working on doesn't interest you anymore, you cling to L's back, hide your face in the crook of his neck, and either sleep or give small feedback on the cases he works on.

The amount of money you two spend on food is not healthy, you're both very aware of that, but if you think you never gain weight so... who cares?

L has a hard time expressing his feelings, you're very aware of that, so you two have little signals whenever he wants something!

Pulling on your thumb whenever he wants a hug (he quickly discovered he adores physical touch), having Watari hand you cookies 'n creme pocky whenever he needed some form of intimate physical touch (kisses, hand holding [only when you two are alone], or particularly... engaging kisses.)

You were half-asleep, a chocolate wafer in your mouth as you lay on the floor, papers scattered around your body like faux snow.

You were bored, unbelievably so. Most of L's time was spent on the Kira case, in which he wouldn't let you participate for the sake of 'your safety' or something you didn't care enough to remember.

You think that was the first serious fight you and your boyfriend had in the three years you've been together. You didn't understand why he wouldn't let you do this, you two were great and reliable detectives. 

His argument of "keeping you safe" didn't make any sense either, because if he dies because of this god-awful and annoying case, you'll end up joining the investigation anyway— by force if you have to.

The sound of a door creaking open slightly catches your attention. The pattern of bare feet coming closer to your figure as a hand gently pulls your thumb.

"I'm mad at you, you know?" You huff, eating the wafer and turning your body away from the black-haired man.

A small noise of frustration comes from behind you as L pulls on your thumb harder. "Hug." 

"Go hug that Yagami boy since you like spending time with him so much." You're being petty, you know, but you can't help it.

You know L loves you, and you love him too but fuck if the Kira case situation didn't get under your skin, you'd be a liar. 

A very bad one too.

The tugs get harder and there's less pause between each one. L is very persistent, you don't know why you thought he'd leave you alone after denying him the first time.

"[Name]. Hug."

A beat of silence passed as your free hand pushed past the papers of evidence for a case you were working on, trying to find a snack.

You felt a tug in your heart when L's grip slightly faltered. With a sigh, you hastily rolled over. Encasing him in your arms and rolling back the other way, the two of you finally look at one another eye to eye.

"Happy now?" You ask in feigning annoyance as you watch your boyfriend's lips slowly curl into a smile, a small dust of red tinting his pale skin.

"Very."

Sighing dramatically, you let him stay in the crook of your neck, legs intertwined as the sleep slowly falls over your body.

You can be mad at him another time.