#some works really do not need to be expanded on. sometimes more content is worse

[iscratchdoors]

man. rw downpour makes me so sad. im one of those ppl that just didn't really enjoy what i played of it and now it's kinda ruined the game for me. i know i can just turn it off and play ol vanilla rw just fine but i feel like i'm missing out on smth the fandom is excited about and i just cannot. feel that excitement. i had fun playing gourmand then artificer totally soured me on the whole thing and now going back to the whole dlc feels more like a chore than an adventure

[ourflagmeansgayrights]

ok so i was actually kinda surprised to find that looking at the ao3 stats and adjusting for how long ofmd’s existed (a year and a half) vs how long the stucky fandom’s been around (coming up on a decade), not only is gentlebeard on par with stucky but it actually beats stucky for amount of fics written. but i’m making a prediction now just based on how i’ve observed fandoms to work: i do think the gentlebeard popularity will peter out faster than stucky did

i’m not saying bc i think gentlebeard is worse or the ofmd fandom is weak or anything, i’m saying this bc in fandom it seems like the white masc queerbait ships* have like, an absurd amount of longevity that goes way beyond the general fandom surrounding whatever media said white masc queerbait ship hails from. im thinking abt the protagonist/rival ship from the TERF wizard series that nobody decent talks about in public anymore. before we all cut jkr out of our lives, people were still churning out fics abt the main character and that racist blond kid pretty regularly. and another example, we have those scientists from pacific rim that are more popular than any of the main characters from that movie. it’s been years and the newt/hermann fandom is still going strong.

and i say “newt/hermann fandom” intentionally, bc that’s the thing that i think actually gives these ships their longevity: when there are fans who are primarily invested in a piece of media because of a noncanonical masc4masc queerbait ship, they’re not really fans of the media itself. i mean, some of them might be, but if they are then that’s in addition to being fans of this alternate queer interpretation of the media in question. they’re a fan of the fandom mass hallucination that the fans collectively and collaboratively invented of a romantic/sexual/homoerotic relationship between two guys who on-screen might hug like once or twice (or sometimes even never)

and i’m pretty sure the reason this sort of fandom phenomenon tends to have so much longevity is bc the fans have already created this whole extensive romantic storyline using what is often some pretty minimal canonical material to work with. so when the movie franchise or the tv show ends and the shippers no longer have any new canonical material to work with, they can keep going for years because really, they were already making shit up from the start.

so compared to that, gentlebeard is way different bc everything the fans might have invented on our own the show pretty much already did for us, and anything the show didn’t do yet is probably coming for us this season (or in s3, fingers crossed). i’ve mentioned before how a lot of fanfiction seems to fall on a spectrum between “fix” and “expand,” and by the end of ofmd i doubt there’s gonna be a whole lot that gentlebeard fans feel like they need to “fix.” versus stucky, where there’s so much that needs to be fixed that you might as well just throw the whole canon out.

i don't really mean any of this as a criticism or an attack on fans of queerbait ships like this, im just pointing out fandom trends that i've noticed. i myself have been deeply invested in stucky, newmann, and the gay wizard boys at different points in my life. like there is something very fun abt putting on slash goggles and making queer content out of nothing. personally though, now that we're in an age where we're getting canon queer content, im not so engaged in a lot of the ships i used to care so much about, but i don't think it's inherently wrong** for people to still enjoy some classic fandom queerbait ships. it's just a very different thing from enjoying canonical queer ships like gentlebeard

*im using “queerbait ships” loosely to include popular gay ships in media that was never in a million years going to make these characters gay.

**a clarifying point: i don't think it's inherently wrong, however there are a lot of problematic elements to this kind of fandom activity, namely the way a lot of these queerbait ships will dominate a fandom while other characters who are important in canon get completely sidelined (and yes, the sidelined characters are often women/poc). also, less importantly, when people's primary media consumption revolves around strip mining canon for shipping content, this absolutely destroys their media literacy and critical thinking. again, im not saying this to attack ppl who engage in fandom primarily through fic/art of noncanonical gay ships, i myself have done the same thing. but i think ppl who do should also make a conscious effort to also engage with fan content that centers women/poc, or at the very least need to be aware of the issues around this kind of fandom activity.

[anghraine]

Long, rambling, general post (with some detours into Austen + SW):

I find the academic obsession with novelty (at least in my field) rather irritating and in some ways actively harmful. But I've been thinking about it as I work on my dissertation, and there is an underlying concept I do find important.

Over here, I'm pretty content to scream my opinions at no one in particular, and have fun if people end up (courteously) answering back. But while there are commonalities between fandom meta practices and academia, a major difference (again, at least in my field) is that in academia, you essentially have to familiarize yourself with the wider community and discourse, and engage with it.

In literature, at least, it's important that you're not just reaching interpretations in a functional vacuum—interpretations that may well have been reached and argued thoroughly and well before. If you've got something fresh to contribute to the overall conversation, okay—maybe you basically agree with another interpretation but feel it could be expanded upon or there are some nuances that got missed. But the conversation doesn't particularly benefit from people just echoing the exact some interpretations over and over without adding or modifying them at all.

To put it another way, not everyone needs to (or should) cover every interpretation they agree with. This is not exactly literary criticism's reputation, but it's fundamentally social. Not everyone needs to do everything. Different people can and should cover different ground, and the general discussion benefits from this.

But this post isn't really about academia.

I think there's some real value in this idea that not everyone needs to be seen to repeat every correct take, or every take they agree with. Sometimes you're not really equipped to add anything. Sometimes you're not the best judge of a particular issue because it's not in your ballpark. Sometimes the ground has been so thoroughly covered in wider social discourse that you don't really need to add to it.

And I think this is especially important when it comes to the Internet firehose. People essentially repeating the same thing over and over and over without adding anything significant is a major way that ideas—including mistaken ideas—spread so quickly. Sometimes it's fairly inane jokes that become inescapable for an OP or within a fandom or whatever (book Isildur fans unite!). Sometimes it's mistaken or irrelevant corrections that someone/some people get bombarded with because no one bothers to check if the corrections have been made already. Sometimes it's the same reply ad nauseam, which quickly becomes intensely irritating while adding nothing. Sometimes it's worse than that—wrongheaded or exaggerated attacks on someone's character that get launched at the person incessantly, or active disinformation.

But basically, I think it's worth considering the shape of the overall discussion when you're considering what you specifically are going to contribute to it, if anything. Sometimes this is very serious. Sometimes it's a minimal consideration for others and for your impact on the general atmosphere in a fandom or some other social context.

For instance: back in 2005, when the Keira Knightley/Matthew Macfadyen Pride and Prejudice came out, my part of Austen fandom was having absolute conniptions over it. Some of this was over literally any adaptation of P&P ever being made after the 1995 mini-series (especially anyone else ever playing Darcy). Some of this was over claims that the 2005 P&P was generally more Brontë than Austen. Some of it had to do with particular contractions, or certain depictions of characters, jokes, aesthetics, dialogue, etc. I remember very serious articles about how it was a flash in the pan that would soon disappear from cultural consciousness (lol).

I actually share a number of the criticisms, as it happens! But I thought (and still think) that the collective outrage was ... excessive, at best. So I mostly didn't talk about my personal gripes because they already seemed to disproportionately dominate the conversation (to me, etc), and I didn't want to add to it. But it interests me that people have sometimes assumed that not personally adding to the griping about it means that I love it (and often, that I need to be corrected from doing so!). The same thing happens with particular ships or dynamics I don't like but don't want to add to discourse about.

I've definitely erred in the other direction. I used to talk quite a bit more about my criticisms of the Star Wars prequels, for instance, which I later regretted despite still having those criticisms. The fandom rage was just so over the top and everything covered so exhaustively and excessively by others that it (very belatedly) started to feel like adding to it was kind of like kicking a dog.

On the flipside, sometimes the firehose is pointed the opposite way from my personal opinion, and even if that opinion is just a mousy little cheep amidst the roar of approval/disapproval, voicing it seems more appropriate to me than joining a stampede of disproportionate hatred. Or sometimes the general discourse is pretty mixed and you just have to exercise judgment about your role in it (I've definitely gone for "I see a lot of debate on this point and hell with it, I get a place in the ring, too").

But in any case, I think that the pressure to be seen to have a take all the time and the assumptions made about people if they don't individually weigh in on ... basically everything is really misguided. We're social creatures! Sometimes ground has already been thoroughly covered. Sometimes it's been covered far too much. And I think stopping to think of what we're really adding, even when we're not plodding through reviews of the literature in academia, can be worth attempting.

[invested-in-your-future]

What are your thoughts on Ice Queendom?

Complicated.

You know how sometimes movies have tie-in comic merch where stuff happens that's not in the final product?

Sometimes, it has good art, while in other cases, it's just a lazy filter applied over movie screencaps. In some cases, the story is pretty good, but mostly - it's just inconsequential tie-in ideas to remind you that the movie exists and to get additional cash - a marketing opportunity.

That's, at the end of the day, what Ice Queendom ended up being.

Don't get me wrong, there are redeeming parts of it that shine - the parts that remake the content from early episodes are great. There's love and effort in depicting the V1 fights, and some genuine talent worked in animating them. It captures some of the charm that early RWBY had in those fights.

But beyond that? The worst thing about Ice Queendom is that it's largely inconsequential.

What does it add to the story, characterization, and worldbuilding?

The world still feels underbuilt, the WF are still the faceless mooks (arguably made even worse by the dream imagery used), Blake still makes no sense, and the under-used characters are still underused. The Faunus prejudice is not really expanded upon at all. It doesn't fix the issues with early Volumes or expand upon things that need expanding.

Weiss gets a few good moments, but nothing really that we haven't known before about her - and since it's inconsequential, it doesn't matter for the mainline product either. The show attempts to make us feel like Weiss's biases have a root in fear and the like, but there's not enough foundation to use that, so, in the end, we don't know more about her prejudice against Faunus either.

And since it's treated just like most of the side-media in RWBY ("hehe, it's canon if you were to headcanon it until we contradict something"), it's not built to SAY anything new, either. The parts that feel new, like the new kind of Grimm, also barely make any sense and FEEL the same way the "canon complimentary" comics or video-game tie-ins to movies do.

For a show titled after Weiss, it doesn't end up saying anything new about her or her family - most of it is just surface-level retelling of what's already there but with the use of visual representation now - a surface-level Kingdom Hearts kind of "evil representations" kind of deal that, in my opinion, only really work when it's all in someone's head and not there physically.

Ultimately, it's a show that doesn't bother committing to the concept it tries to execute - it is either afraid or uninterested (or not allowed to) delve deeper into the characters or do anything out of the ordinary. So, in the end, it's a show whose primary value lies in seeing the V1E1 and Nevermore fights. Once the "anime original" part starts, it quickly loses it's steam as it's not allowed to say or do anything with what it attempts depicting.

It does happen to have one of the worst opening credits ever - a literal clip show.

And it's also, coincidentally, the SECOND time Weiss gets a characterization arc in the media OUTSIDE the canon story. We shouldn't NEED to watch a spin-off airing in Japan or a weird Justice League crossover to get a sense of how Weiss feels about things.

Can we please stop stuffing the development and screentime of the story's ACTUAL PROTAGONISTS THAT THE SHOW IS NAMED AFTER into side media while dedicating all the screentime in the MAIN show to some guy named Jaune?

[persephoneflouwers]

Hello Angie!

I hope you don’t mind the novel but hey you wanted to share thoughts so here I am!

Rationalize is a big word but me thinks this is happening for various reasons, you tell me what you think about these options:

- Louis has this persona of “not wanting to grow up” so a younger girlfriend fits what everybody knows about him. She also seems to be tailored to the het audience who wants to “date him” and might identify with her. You know, sort of what El 1.0 was in 2012, the girl next door sort of thing but still “a fashion model” (who does no modeling, lol). But these pap pics feel precisely planned to make her look like a fan, so the message seems to be if she can date him, all fans can too! He’s a normal dude dating a normal girl who looks just like you! Buy tickets to his concerts and you might get lucky (because I can pretty much guess she’s gonna disappear real quickly and he’s going to be *available* and party boy during tour 🥲)

- There’s extra gayness in the documentary so having a son wasn’t enough. Seems unlikely but who knows? Rainbows can’t be erased from his tour shots, so I guess it’ll have to be addressed in some way.

- Also having a new romance in general helps with publicity, so for him to be talked about before the doc release. I still would have picked a higher profile, maybe another musician girl, if you really needed to sell a certain image AND benefit Louis and expand his audience, but again let’s be real I think his PR is incompetent. If I have to give them the benefit of the doubt, maybe the fan, down to earth girl angle is what they actually wanted to achieve with picking a good-looking nobody (back to point 1). It’s clearly benefitting her more than him (she went from 5K followers this morning to what, 35K now?)

- last wild though, maybe there was something with Eleanor wearing his clothes and still posting from his house that didn’t sit well with someone? So they needed to make a point? Wild but we’ve seen worse so keeping all options open.

I genuinely don’t know, but a mix options 1 and 3 seem the more rational. What do you think?

Last thought: I really hope she was ready and well informed before agreeing to this, but the whole shitshow with the Pinterest pins and Spotify playlists tells me there was a level of naivety on her end which is alarming. She was probably guided into this by a reckless agent with who knows what promises and it scares me. I don’t mind the age gap (my parents started dating when she was 18 and he was 29), but I do mind the fact that she’s likely too young to handle the hate she’s getting, regardless of the economic gains she’ll get from this it’s going to be traumatic if you don’t have the right support to handle it/maturity.

Hello, angel! Thank you for sharing <3 I will slowly go through your thoughts and explain what I think.

1. The forever young boy is interesting, bc Louis comes off as the loud hyperactive guy sometimes. Unfortunately I think they burned this option out when they gave him a fake kid lol

2. I think feeding such a dream to his fans is a huge underdevelopment, but it’s loyal to his fanbase origin. Still. It’s so cringe for me that a 31 yo man with a kid goes out with a young girl who pins tiktoks and random tattoos researches on Pinterest. It’s counterproductive, dumb and lazy. I don’t look at them as examples and I don’t expect them to do smart shit. we’re talking about rich people growing up as completely detouched from normal world since they were teenagers. Me and them, you and them? We’re not the same as them. I hoped he was smarter than this tho. Of course this can be useful as promo for the doc… will it tho, we know how his team and the media treat his content and projects, so I wouldn’t be surprised if they wouldn’t get any coverage not even with these pics. I don’t think that’s how you expand a fanbase or get more people curious in his work.

3. I think Eleanor simply wanted to be out for whatever reason. I think they replaced her with a new one bc E wasn’t going to engage with bg. She has never and she won’t (so far). I hope this new girl did her homework because fandom is hard to manage.

[itsallyscorner]

Bring Me Back

Pairing: Tom Holland x Reader

Summary: Filming “Cherry” had its ups and downs for Tom. When filming finally takes its toll on him, you’re there to instantly bring him back from the world of Cherry.

Warnings: Mentions of drug abuse, PTSD, murder. A smidge of smut.

A/n: In honor of the Cherry🍒 trailer dropping, I decided to write this!

(GIF creds: @atealiers )

Any kind of project was a blessing to Tom. He loved being an actor. He was fond of telling stories through the big screen and got a kick from portraying many different characters. Acting was something he felt passionate about, it was his craft and he was very dedicated when it came to becoming his roles. Cherry was quite different from the other movies he’s been in. It was dark and contained many subjects like drug addiction, PTSD, and crime. The world of Cherry was something Tom was not used to; it was twisted. He hasn’t been exposed to things like drugs or the events that Nico Walker had been through. Which was why he was hesitant to take on the role of Cherry.

When the Russo Brothers approached him with the idea, he was excited. He was getting the opportunity to tell another story and would explore the world of a new character. Though the more he looked into it, he realized that maybe he wasn’t up for the role. Was he really ready to dive into the dark and traumatizing life of Nico Walker? As an actor, he was willing to take the job, it would give him an opportunity to expand his career and would possibly be one of his best work. As Tom, he wasn’t sure if he could handle learning or re-enacting the events that occurred in Cherry. But Tom did like a challenge, which was why he ended up agreeing to become Cherry.

He prepared himself mentally and physically pre- production. For research, he interviewed army veterans and former drug addicts to get an idea of what it was like to be in those positions. To get the look of Cherry, he did a variety of things. For example, going on a diet and losing weight, then gaining said weight again once they had to shoot the army scenes. Another thing he did was shave off the gorgeous brown curls that adorned his head. At first you weren’t too happy with his change in hairstyle, but later on you found yourself running your hands along the short strands of hair, loving the fuzzy feeling it gave your palms.

After the interviews and hearing others’ experience, Tom felt a level of responsibility to tell the story of millions of people around the world. Not only was it telling the story of Nico, but of other army veterans who suffered from PTSD and people who’ve had drug addictions. He was fully on board now and there was no looking back. He was going to push himself to the limit and to places he’s never been before.

Filming was tough. There were scenes he had to do that were so unlike him, that felt wrong, and sometimes he just had to take a step back. They didn’t feel right, but it was nothing he couldn’t handle. This was his job, if he wanted this movie to be the best that it can, he was going to commit. Thankfully, he was working with the Russos, who he’s known for a while now. He was familiar with the two and they were patient with him, giving him the time to regain himself before shooting an intense scene. The cast and crew were very understanding as well, creating a safe space for him on set. Having Harry along with him helped as well, the familiarity of his brother kept him grounded and avoided him from falling into the void of Cherry. Though he had all these supportive people around him, there was only one person who could calm him down when things got suffocating on set. The only person he wanted to be in Cleveland with him but wasn’t. You. Since you had your own life and job, you were unable to fly out to Cleveland with him. Instead you stayed at your shared home with Tessa as company. All he needed was you when he felt the affects of Cherry caging in on him. Just the sound of your comforting voice over the phone could clear his head and make him breath again.

He had his bad days on set, where he would have to take a moment and hide in his trailer for a few minutes. During those few minutes he liked to be alone as he waited for you to answer your phone. The line would ring, it’d stop, then the sound of your sweet voice would be the only thing he’d hear. Sometimes you didn’t answer the first time, but nonetheless you answered eventually. It wasn’t the same as having you with him in person, you had your responsibilities, and he understood that. He just wished that one day you’d come to Cleveland. He wanted to be in your arms, stuff his face into your neck, breath in your familiar scent, he just wanted to feel you. You were his home. His safe haven. And it was all he wanted right now.

•

Glancing at your phone, you wondered why Tom hasn’t texted you yet. Not that you were itching for him to text you, but because around this time he would be blowing up your phone telling you things that happened during filming or how his day was going. You decided that filming probably went into overtime making him busy during his break. You shrug to yourself and continue working on your laptop.

You hear the sound of Tessa’s nails clicking against the floors as she enters the office of your home. You greet her with a smile as she settles herself beside your legs.

“Is it dinner time already, Tess?” You scratch her head as you glance at the time on your screen. It was currently nine at night, a bit late for dinner, but you haven’t noticed.

“Just give me five more minutes and I’ll get us dinner. How does that sound, love?” A somewhat sound of approval emits from Tessa. You get back to work, fingers typing away as you finish off the last of your work.

You finish in four minutes, finally satisfied with your work. You let out a content sigh and turn your laptop off. When you get up you stretch and let your bones crack after being in the same position for hours. Tessa joins you, stretching out her front paws then shaking her body out. You chuckle as you lead the way to the kitchen. Taking the scoop for Tessa’s kibble, you fill her bowl up, causing the dog to look up in curiosity. Once you placed the bowl down, her tail wagged wildly as she stuffed her face into her food.

You decided on going for something simple, ramen noodles. You were too tired too cook anything and ramen noodles were the quickest thing to cook in your pantry. While you waited for the noodles to heat up you checked your phone. You went through your notifications, but there were still no texts from Tom. Though you were concerned, you assumed that they had a long shooting day, making him too busy to text. 

Hi love! I hope you’re doing well in Cleveland. I know you’re probably busy, but hopefully filming isn’t tiring you out too much. Have an amazing day! Don’t forget to drink some water from time to time and eat :) Tess and I miss you and love you so much! Talk soon xxx

You send the text with a smile. He won’t read it till he was free or done with filming, but you knew he’d see the message while you were asleep.

The microwave beeps, letting you know that your food was done. You end your night catching up on episodes of New Girl and eating soup. When you were done you did your nightly routine and settled in bed. You turn the lights off and snuggled under the warm sheets.

“Night Tessa.” You whisper to her. A huff comes out of her as she makes herself comfortable on the foot of your bed. When the both of you were settled, you slowly drifted off to sleep.

Buzz

Buzz

The harsh vibrations of your phone shook you awake. Desperate for sleep, you blindly grab your phone and turn it off. Silence fills the room again as you turn around to stuff your face into Tom’s pillow. You were slowly drifting back to sleep when your phone began to vibrate again. With a groan you stretch back and snatch for phone off the night stand. You don’t bother looking at the caller id.

“Hello?” Your voice rasps out.

“Thank God you answered.” The person on the other line said. “I know you’re busy, but how soon can you visit Cleveland?” The deep voice was belonged to Harry.

“Uh—I’m not too sure, I’ll need to check in with my boss.” You reply. When you start feeling more awake you become curious as to why Harry can be calling you. “Why? Is everything ok? How’s Tom? I haven’t heard from him all day.”

The younger Holland sighs. He takes a moment to answer your questions making you suffer in silence, wondering what could have happened to your boyfriend. “Um, they’ve been shooting some intense scenes lately. Tom’s been trying his best but everyone’s noticed that he’s been a bit different.”

You sit up in bed feeling more awake. “What do you mean by different, Haz?”

“Well he’s snapped at the Russos quite a few times. There was this one scene, that they shot multiple times, and Tom would just break down after every one. (Y/n), I’m concerned for my brother, I don’t know what else to do. He’s locked himself in his room after every shoot. A—and I don’t know. I’ve tried to tell him that he can talk to me but he wouldn’t.” Harry explained, his voice croaked. You heart felt heavy for him. Harry was always there for his older brother, so to see him feel so helpless made you feel sorry.

“Haz, calm down, you know how your brother can get. How long has this been happening?”

Harry sniffed over the phone, “About a few weeks now. It’s only started becoming worse last week and now.”

The concern you felt for Tom grew. From what he’s been texting you, filming had been going great. He appeared happy on your FaceTime calls and sounded like his usual self. But maybe he actually wasn’t.

“Harry everything’s gonna be fine, alright?” You assure him. “I’ll call my boss first thing in the morning and when I get the ‘ok’ to leave I’ll get the first flight out to Cleveland. How’s that sound?”

“It sounds good. Can you tell me if you can make it? I’ll have someone come with me to pick you up at the airport.” His voice is quiet, almost muffled.

“Yeah I will, don’t worry.”

“Ok, thank you (y/n).” A small smile forms on your lips. You rub the sleep out your eyes as you glance at your closet. “Alright Haz, I’m gonna go now. But if there’s anything else, just text me or call.”

“I know, stay safe (y/n).” You bid him goodbye and place your phone on the empty space beside your side of the bed. Tom’s side of the bed. You bite your lip in thought as you worry about your boyfriend. You knew he was doing almost everything he can to make sure the movie came out perfect. If that meant shredding himself emotionally and physically, he was going to do it. Tom was dedicated to his work, but he’s never done anything close to Cherry, making you worried about the thoughts that could possibly be going through your lover’s head.

Tessa, who’s now woken up, waddles closer to you, sensing your uneasiness. You appreciate the dog’s gesture and pull her into your side, resting your chin on her head. You were basically sleepless the whole night. Although you haven’t emailed your boss yet, you already had a suitcase packed of your clothes. Your passport and other important belongings were already in a bag, ready to leave London.

The morning had been hectic. You’ve managed to get two hours of sleep, waking up at six in the morning. Still in bed, you sent your boss an email about a family emergency and how you needed to be out of the country for at least a week. As if the gods above knew of your situation, your boss willingly let you go, no questions asked and gave you well wishes. With that out the way, you scowered the Internet for flights to Cleveland. Luck was on your side that morning because you’ve booked a flight that took off in the afternoon. With your bags packed, you drove to Nikki and Dom’s to drop off Tessa.

Now all checked in, you were at Heathrow Airport waiting to be called for your flight. You were sat at your gate, with an iced coffee and a croissant from Starbucks, texting Harry. The two of you were discussing the time you’d arrive and how he’d pick you up. When you were both in agreement, you two decided to catch up. He had been in Tom’s trailer eating his breakfast. An hour passes and you were being called to board the plane.

You settle in your seat, but your leg bounced in anticipation. After the things Harry told you, you just wanted to have your boyfriend in your arms. You knew everything was probably getting to his head, all you wanted to do was hold him and tell him that he was going to be ok. As the plane began to take off, your lack of sleep caught up on you. Throughout the whole flight, you slept soundly, the worries of Tom subsiding for the time being.

~🛬~

The plane lands in Cleveland safely. It was night when you arrived. With your bags, you looked around the airport for a familiar curly haired boy. Harry waves wildly at you before running and pulling you into a tight hug. You laugh wrapping your arms around the slender boy.

“How’s your day been, Haz?” You ruffle his hair as he rolls your suitcase to the parking lot. He shrugs, “The usual. Was on set with Tom, ran around and got things for him, nothing much happened honestly. But you’re here now, so this is the highlight of my night.”

The two of you approach a black car with a driver inside, Harry motions for him to unlock the trunk. He lifts your case in before the two of you get into the backseat.

“How was your flight?” Harry asks you. The car began to move, exiting the airport and entering the highway.

“I slept through all of it, I don’t remember a thing about the flight besides getting on and off it.” You chuckle, leaning your head back against the headrest.

Harry nudges your shoulder, “Thanks for coming out with such short notice.” You wave him off. “It’s no worries, anything for my boys.”

The car is quiet, the only sounds that could be heard is the car’s wheels against the pavement. You turn to Harry, “How was he today?”

“He was pretty good in the morning.” Harry started. “Then filming started and he would grow frustrated after a few scenes. His temper’s been short. He snapped at me during lunch, which is normal, but I just asked him if he wanted some water. He broke down after a certain scene today, I tried talking to him but he still wouldn’t open up about it.” Tom wasn’t too open about his feelings sometimes. He struggled to voice them at times making all his frustrations and feelings bottled up in his head.

Half an hour later and you guys arrive at Tom’s rented home in Atlanta. As soon as you opened the door, you felt the heavy atmosphere. It was somber and tense, the chilliness of the weather also felt inside the house. Harry gestures up the stairs, “Don’t worry, go see him. His room is the first door on the left.”

You quietly thank him and climb up the stairs. You find his door, taking a deep breath before knocking. You hear some shuffling behind the door, “Harry I’m fine! Leave me alone!” His voice was deep, a bit scratchy. You frown at the door.

“Tom?” The room falls quiet. Suddenly you hear fumbling and the sound of heavy footsteps behind the door. The door opens and you finally see him. He was dressed in a large shirt with sweatpants. He looked tired, dark circles under his eyes, eyes glassy, and chapped lips.

“(Y/n)? You’re here?” He asks you in disbelief. A tight lipped grin forms on your lips.

“Yeah, Har—“ You were going to explain how you got there but he immediately threw himself at you. His arms wrap tightly around your figure, his head dipped into your neck, pulling your closer into him. One of your arms go around his neck while the other rubs his back soothingly. A whimper bubbles out of him, his shoulders beginning to shake. You managed to shuffle the both of you back into his room, closing the door behind you.

“You’re ok.” You whisper into his ear, pressing a kiss to the side of his neck. His grip around you never falters. Though he was much taller than you, he seemed so small at the moment. His body drowned in the shirt he wore, making him look thinner. You feel tears soaking into your shirt, making your heart clench in pain. You rest your forehead against his shoulder, holding and whispering sweet nothings into his ear until he was ready to speak.

A few minutes pass until his removes his head from your neck. You frown at his tear stained face, his eyes and cheeks red from quietly sobbing into your shoulder. Your hands cup his face, wiping the trails of tears on his cheeks. Tom leans closer to your touch, his eyes shut while his lips kiss your palm.

“I’m sorry, you’re probably tired from the flight.” He apologizes but you shake your head. You lead him to his bed and sit against the headboard. Tom follows in suit, desperately trying to get closer to you. His arms wrap around your torso, his head rests on your chest, while your legs tangle themselves together.

“I’ve had plenty of sleep on the flight, how are you?” Your lips are against his short hair from holding him so close. You nails scratch softly at his hair, calming him down.

“I don’t know if I could finish it.” He quietly admits. He shakes his head at himself.

“Why’s that, Tom?” Your boyfriend takes a deep breath as he sits up, removing himself from your touch. He sits across from you with legs crossed as he holds his head in his hands.

“I—I, it’s too much. There’s so much fucked up things he’s done. And all the things he’s seen. I just—sometimes I feel like it’s me who’s committed all of those things. When we shoot the scenes in the war and when I had to do drugs and rob banks, I felt like I lost myself—“ He cries interrupting himself to take a breath in. Compared to your fingers that ran gently through his hair, his clawed at his head. His palms rub harshly at his face, turning his skin a bright tint of red. To see Tom in such pain made you sad. You hated seeing him like this.

You gently remove his hands from scratching at his face and hold them in his lap. He stares down at your hands, clinging onto them as if his life depended on it. “I get lost in the character sometimes and I have to pull myself out of it to bring me back. But it keeps on happening over and over again. Then the Russos kept telling me to reshoot the scene more like Cherry, and I lost it and yelled at them.” You feel his tears fall to your your hands, making tears well up in your own eyes. You shuffle closer to him and kiss his forehead before pulling him into you. You stay quiet, letting him get whatever he wanted to get out.

Tom’s face is against your shoulder again. He sniffs before continuing, “It’s like everyday I find something he and I have in common. Then I think that maybe I’m turning into him. I don’t want him to be part of me. (Y/n), I don’t want to be him, I don’t want to do the things he’s done.” He sobs into your shoulder. Your heart breaks at how broken he sounded. His shoulders shook again, his back burning up with tension. A few tears made it’s way down your cheeks as you pulled his face away from you.

“Look at me.” You urged him. His jaw clenched, still looking down at his lap. He shook his head in response. “Tom, please. Look at me.” Your voice cracks. He slowly tilts his head up, your eyes connecting. He didn’t have that twinkle in his eyes, it’s like they’ve lost the light in them. Instead they were dark, like there was no life behind them. There was a mix of sadness, confusion, and even fear in his eyes.

You sadly smiled at him, cupping his face with your hands. “You’re not going to be him. You never will. You’re Tom. You are nothing close to Nico or Cherry. You are the sweetest man I have known in the world, you wouldn’t even hurt a damn fly. You’re not him. I know you aren’t. You wouldn’t do the things he’s ever done even if you were forced to. I know you Tom, I assure you, you’re nothing like him.” Tom hiccups, gripping onto your wrists.

“When this is all over and you’re done filming, we can forget about him. We won’t even mention him.” You assure him, stroking his cheeks.

“What if—,” You cut him off.

“No, there’s no what if’s. You’re going to be fine Tom. You’re surrounded by people who love you and will make you realize that you’re nothing even near him. You are the kindest man ever, you love your family, you care about your fans, and your brothers. You’re busy always taking care of everyone else, I think it’s time you take care of yourself, love.” You tell him. A small smile is on your face but it falters, “You don’t have to go through this alone, Tom.”

Tom takes a shaky breath in. “You’ll be there right?” He asks like a child making sure his mother will be there when he wakes up. “You’ll be there with me to bring me back?”

Your thumb smooths the crinkle between his brows, “I always will. I promise.” He nods and pulls you into him. You climb onto his lap and settle on his legs. He stares up at you, one of his his hands supporting your back, the other pressed against your cheek. “Thank you. I missed you so much. I’m sorry for not texting, everything’s just been so taxing mentally and physically.”

“No, don’t worry I get it.” You turn your face to press a light kiss on his palm. For the first time since you’ve seen him, Tom managed to crack a smile on his lips. He moves some strands of hair away from your face before resting his large hand on the back of your head. “I love you. I love you so much, (y/n).”

“I love you too, Tom.” You whisper against his lips. He takes that as a sign to finally crash your lips together. After months being apart, the feeling of his lips against yours felt like coming home. The kiss was desperate, like it was the air you both breathed. Tom had been longing for your touch, he craved you every second of the day, whether it be sexually or just missing you. The kiss grew rough, your teeth clashing, tongues poking and gliding against each other.

Tom lays you down on the bed, hovering over you. His hands grab and stroke at your body, trying to pull off your clothes to get close to your skin. He suddenly pulls away from your lips. “I need you. Please, I need you.” He almost begs you. Panting, you nod and push him to lay on his back. “Ok, let me take care of you, Tommy.”

He yanks his shirt off, throwing it to the side. You do the same, leaning down to meet his lips again. You kiss your way along his jaw and down to his neck. When you find that certain spot, he lets out a throaty groan, head falling back against the pillows. You run your nails along his chiseled abs and slightly roll your hips against his growing length. Tom grunts, hands instantly connecting to your ass and gripping onto your cheeks. He helps you roll your hips more, deeper with more friction against you two.

“Mm, Tom. I missed you.” You moan against his neck. You bite down and soothe the spot with your tongue after.

Tom looks down at you, lifting his hips to meet your clothes pussy. “Fucking miss you so much. You have no idea how much I’ve been dreaming of being buried in you again.” You kiss your way down his chest, but Tom stops you. His hands grab onto your leggings and slide them off.

“N-no foreplay. I need to feel you.” He stutters out, mouth agape. You nod in agreement and take his sweatpants off along with his boxers. You spit in your hand, running your hand along his dick to give it some wetness. Tom helps you lift yourself over him and guides your hips down his erected cock. You let out a combination of a sigh and moan as your walls envelop and stretch around him. Tom slightly sits up against the headboard, your tightness wrapping around him. He lets out a cry of relief, your walls around him feeding his cravings. You use his shoulders as leverage to pull yourself up but Tom stops you.

“What’s wrong?” You eye him cautiously. Tom shakes his head, “Nothing’s wrong. I just—can we stay like this for a while? I just want to feel you, please?”

“Yeah, we can do that.” You send him a reassuring smile as you settle back down on him. His hands make themselves comfortable around your waist. You maneuver your arms under his and wrap them around his back. Tom smiles at you, rubbing your back and guiding you into his chest. Before you can nuzzle your face into his neck, he presses a kiss to your temple and lets his fingers get tangled in your hair.

With his eyes closed in bliss, he whispers, “Thank you for bringing me back. I love you.”

You kiss his collarbone basking in the feeling him being so close to you. “I’ll always be here. I love you too.”

[cblgblog]

I know I’m probably beating a dead horse at this point but I feel like it isn’t talked about enough how the accord do not and will never affect Tony the same way they’ll affect those like Steve & Wanda. Tony can always just blow up all of his suits again & go back to a fully normal life if he wants to. He doesn’t have to wear a tracking bracelet, or submit dna samples, or fear getting shoved into a straight jacket or electroshock collar if he gets arrested. I’ll I just don’t think it’s addressed enough how blatantly privileged Tony & other normal humans like rhodey & nat would be under the accords compared to their other teammates. No wonder they were so supportive of them from the beginning.

Ah, but what is fandom for if not the beating of dead horses?

I agree with you. I generally prefer the film over the comic event (granted I haven’t read it in a few years now), but I do like that the Civil War comic had more time to discuss those civil liberties issues. Like, the damn thing, as with most comics events, is annoyingly massive. Not if you just read the core 6 books of the main CW storyline, but the tie-ins, oh my God the tie-ins. Comic events and their damn tie-ins…

For the sake of telling a fuller story though, I do like that the comics had so damn much. There was much more room for side content, for lesser characters who aren’t in the MCU, or weren’t, at the time. There’s a fuller picture of why various people are taking the sides they do. Some of those reasons make more sense than others, but yeah.

There’s a bit from the comics that I’ve posted before where Tony and Peter (mid 20’s, his own hero Peter, not Frankenstein, Tonky Jesus fanboy Peter) are arguing about the Registration Act—as it’s called in the comics—and talking about the civil liberties being violated. Being a 2006 book, it’s got a very post 9/ll, Guantanamo Bay theme going. The lack of trial, of legal representation, the prison that’s even worse than The Raft. There are several scenes like this as I recall, and yeah, the film is sorely missing them in places. You kind of see it with Team Cap in The Raft, but it’s very much a quick thing in the larger narrative of the film, and that’s annoying.

I’m not exactly advocating for this, because the film version with it’s smaller focus works a lot better in many respects, but I do sometimes think of the alternate reality where Disney Plus existed sooner, and Civil War was turned into a series instead of a film. Say six episodes, match the number of installments in the main comic event, eight eps if you wanted to push it. Then we could get something that delved deeper into what these documents actually say, what the public’s reaction to them is, how they would affect people besides our core Avengers group.

Show some kid like Peter who has abilities but doesn’t want to go out and fight bad guys, just wants to live a normal life. Show someone who can’t reveal their Enhanced nature to friends or family because it wouldn’t be safe for that person. Show the every day or every day-ish people (ala the Netflix shows) and where they stand on this. Wanda talks about people being scared of her after the Lagos incident and you kind of see that, but not really. Actually show that. Show the fears that people have of these Enhanced people, the legit and less legit ones, and show the other side too, the regular, every day people who still look at this and say hey, no, hang on, this is wrong.

Again, not necessarily saying I’d want this over the film, but if the Mouse overlords ever wanted to revisit that storyline and expand on it, I wouldn’t complain.

And yeah, people have talked about this too, but it kind of sucks the way the film handled everyone and their reasons for siding how they did. Steve is all about choice and keeping the government from abusing its citizens ala Hydra, Tony’s got his whole, we need to be kept in check thing, but very few of our other players land where they land because of the actual Accords. Nat doesn’t want her Avengers family to fall apart, and wants to maintain some control over the situation rather than none. Rhodey’s the career military man who (generally) follows orders and hey, if this is what most people want, we don’t get to just decide eh, no thanks. Panther doesn’t care about any of this, dude just picks the team that’s going after Bucky. Peter doesn’t know what the fuck he is actually fighting for, Tony didn’t tell him, Scott and Clint are there because Cap asked, and also, presumably, because of the danger the Accords would put their family in, but that second point is never explicitly stated.

And Sam…I feel like we really got fucking robbed with Sam, especially in light of what we’ve learned about his character in Falcon and WS. The film doesn’t much go into his reasoning, beyond the fact he believes in Cap, he’s Cap’s ride or die, etc. But given the history he has in Falcon and WS, again, we were robbed. Dude is all about making sure minorities aren’t oppressed, aren’t punished for existing. Dude is very much aware of the double-standards in this country. I know that stuff was written in later, but my God did we miss out on a Sam monologue about this in CW. Sam, who’s like Nat and Tony in that he can theoretically hang up the wings and be free of the Accords, but still takes the other side. Would’ve been hella interesting to see Sam and Rhodey’s little argument they have about it be an actual scene, an actual debate. Sam who knows of the US government and it’s unjust laws and abuse of power, knows it long before he hears of Isiah Bradley. Who has those nephews that will have to grow up in a post-Accords world. It just would’ve been super interesting to see Rhodey and Sam, both Black men who joined the military, one who left, one who didn’t, have an actual discussion on why they feel what they feel. Even discounting the finer details of the Sam stuff, the stuff that wasn’t written yet, it would’ve been cool.

And, of course it would’ve been awesome to see Tony and the non-powered on Team Iron Man (but mostly Tony) get called out on their privilege with this issue, but that of course couldn’t happen, because Tony has plot immunity. Let fire and lightning pour forth and destroy all who dare to question the wisdom of Tonky Jesus, praise be to Tonky and all he has given us.

[somanyerikas]

Nostalgia sells - or does it? About BBC’s rehiring of a previous showrunner for Doctor Who as a marketing strategy

All, right, this is the one where I deal with my issues about RTD’s rehiring from the standpoint of BBC’s business strategy . Brace for passive agression, swearwords, brief history of british television and numbers. So, so many numbers.

Allright, so I already wrote a post about my problem with RTD’s (re)hire from the creative standpoint (it’s here in case you’re interested), but hey, I can bitch about it all I want, but we all know what caused the BBC to make this decision, right? You’ve heard about it for sure. The Dropping Ratings. You’ve read about it on so many posts, lots of them probably oh-so-gladly conflating this fact with their own opinion about the deteriorating quality of the show. (Don’t worry, we’ll get to that.) So Obviously the execs at the Big BBC Quarters needed to do something about it, and what better way to go than rehire a guy who’s run at Doctor Who is a warm childhood memory for so many in it’s fanbase? After all, it’s what we’re seeing nowadays: from Star Wars return to wave of 80′s nostalgia to every old blockbuster star doing a comeback, there is but a single conclusion - nostalgia sells.

Or does it?

Part One: Moving with the change; or very much refusing to.

Let’s start this off with some facts about the ratings for Doctor Who. (Well, I warned you there’s gonna be numbers, didn’t I. Stick with me, I’m going somewhere with this I promise.) In it’s beginnings, in the sixties and seventies , the series flown high, averaging a viewership from 8 up to 10 million viewers per season. Collin Baker’s series 17 brought in a record of 11.21 milion viewer asses in front of a good ol’ TV screen, real champagne opener here. But, as it happens, things were downhill from here. During the eighties, the rating started dropping steadily, reaching an all-time low of 4.15 milion couch-warming bottoms in 1989, the last season of the classic era. 

Years passed, 16 of those years to be exact, and here comes our saviour RTD. Under his wings, the revived series premiered, bringing in over 10 milion viewers to the premiere episode of season 1, Rose. A viewership this high did not last for long, but still, RTD’s seasons averaged between 7 and 8 milion viewers per season, which seemed pretty respectable. But then, as the story likes to repeat itself, not unlike the bbc execs just did, along came the decline again. Ever since 2010, the ratings began steadily dropping again, from 7.95 in 2010 to 5.46 in 2017. Then DW experienced an unexpected peak in 2018 with the premiere of Jodie Whittaker’s first season, which averaged 7.96 viewing asses, but then continued the dropping trend on the next season, averaging 5.40 viewing butts.

So what went wrong?

You see, part of the reason that Doctor Who was bringing in such great viewership numbers in the 60′s and 70′s, was that, to put it simply, BBC did not have much competition. Or, to be exact, only had one competitor. ITV was literally founded in order to break BBC’s monopoly over British television. But in the 80′s, with the launch of Channel 4 and Sky, the british viewers had more and more options to choose from. So logically speaking, they no longer had to watch BBC’s programming just because there was nothing else on. There was more and more new programes to boredom-watch. And here’s something y’all need to know about the tv industry: the boredom-watchers, the casuals? That’s the most important demographic. As hard as it might be to swallow, us hardcore fans, forum dwellers and Ao3 gremlins, we’re not as big of a group as we’d like to think. Loving fans are important to the tv execs as providers of word-of-mouth advertisment, but the real numbers come from the casual, everyday viewer who will just put on the next episode cause the other one was kinda fun I guess. Or more fun than the other options, anyway.

And this is why, by the way, when someone is conflating low viewership with the show Dissapointing The Fans, they’re full of shit. I’m sorry, but we’re really not that much of a force here, definitely not enough to make such a big impact on the numbers. Another factor, that some of you probably noticed already, is that the numbers I’m quoting are from british tv only, while the online fandom is very much international, so our opinions matter even less to the british execs, I’m sorry again, hard pill to swallow I know, but true nonetheless.

But I digress. So, to sum up the previous paragraph, Doctor Who’s viewership decline in the 80′s was the effect of the changing landscape of the TV industry, with which the BBC struggled to come to terms with.

Sound familiar?

Let’s move on to the 2010′s, shall we?

2010 was is actually a good marker of a year to choose, because it marks one important thing that begun a big change in the industry. This was the year in which Netflix expanded their services overseas, from being a DVD rental company to providing VOD services. Over the next decade streaming services grew in importance, from being an add-on to your cable TV that you didn’t really want but they were throwing it in for cheap, to very much self-sustainable media services you might very well buy instead of buying the cable. And if you look at the numbers for Doctor Who viewership declining over the last 10 years, that’s precisely what’s been happening. It’s not that people don’t want to watch Doctor Who on tv, they don’t want to watch tv in general. Do you know what was the most popular channel in Britain this year? Can you guess? Fucking Netflix that’s what. It’s just slowly-yet-steadily ceasing to be the way we use home entertainment anymore. Again, not much to do with the audience approval, because for that matter, let’s see about the specific episodes that saw the spikes in viewership. 

Rose, which i mentioned at the start of it, was for the longest time the unquestionable queen when it comes to viewership, at 10.81 milion. The next episode, The End of the World, pulled in 7.97 - almost 3 millions worth of lost viewer-butts in one week? Is it because it was so much worse than it’s predecessor? No, it simply did not have the smell of Newness, the Event You Must See, and as such brought forth less of the casual viewers who were simply curious about The New Thing. The next season followed the similar formula, peaking at the premiere, when the marketing was at it’s strongest, going down during the season, sometimes rising slightly for the finale, sometimes not. The most popular episodes are, of course, the specials - yet again, the vibe of The Event To Be Seen worked here, but one more thing working to their advantage is they often aired in spaces between seasons, serving as both a long-waited Crumbs of Content for the fans, and the basically stand-alones for the casuals. Do you know what the single most watched episode of revived DW is? No, it’s not Tennant’s goodbye with the role (yeah I know, I thought it had to be that as well). It was Voyage of the Damned, between seasons 3 and 4. The perfect standalone for the casual watcher. And last but not least, you know one more special feature that brought, maybe not as much, but definitely more than expected? The 1996 movie Doctor Who, with 9.08 million. Again, a perfect standalone.

But the standalones aren’t the only way to grab the viewership. The currently-highest viewing non-special episode of DW? The Woman Who Fell to Earth, Jodie Whittaker’s introduction. In 2018 no less, in the year when the streaming was the ruler supreme, this episode brought a whooping 10.96 million buts to the good ol’ TV again. Let me reiterate: this episode brought in more viewers than Rose did in 2005, while having WAY more competition and way less favorable circumstances of release that RTD’s debiut did. Not only that, it managed to bring on some numbers for the entire season as well, not as good of course as the premiere (because again, the Event vibes faded), but still brought a better average than the last six seasons did. (Again, let me reiterate: more than the last SIX seasons. More viewership than any series since 2010, since the Streaming Wars.) So clearly, this must be the way, right? Catering to this Weird New Trend, that saw directors notice there do in fact exist other actors than white men, that surely brought in some profit, even Marvel does it now, right? Out with the old, in with the new!

Part 2 The Deceitful Charm of Nostalgia

Well, it turns out the whole Doing New Things deal didn’t work out that well after all, now did it? The second season penned by Chibbnal averaged 5.40 milion, that’s 2.5 million drop from the previous one! It must mean it didn’t work, right? Well, yes and no. As much as the refreshment of the formula as simple as Let’s Put A Woman In It absolutely worked for one season, it very visibly did not hold up for longer. An Event-Episode is something that can still happen on TV, Event-Series? That’s pretty much reserved for streaming now, if you think about it, and it’s honestly kind of a miracle that Series 11 did as well as it had. Two consecutive Event-Series on network tv? Flat out impossible. 

So how to make those ratings great again? How to get those butts in seats of the Good Ol’? Well, the execs of the BBC have a plan for that. They brought in a devouring beast, and it’s name is: Nostalgia.

Without a doubt, there is a number of people who feel nostalgic about RTD’s era of Doctor Who. It’s a lot of people’s fond childhood memory, or the series they started with, and judging by the numbers, there should be quite a lot of them. So the new plan, as it appears, is to get to those who maybe lost interest in the show and lure them with the promise of the thing That Is Totally Like The Thing You Used To Love, Remember? (This is why I don’t actually think that RTD will be allowed to do anything new and interesting, that’s not what they hired him for. And that’s why I think this is bad from the creative standpoint.) So there are two questions here: One, will the people be lured? And two, for how long?

Nostalgia as a marketing strategy is something that you’re probably sick of seeing already (I know I am). But it has very much been effective on many levels, especially the eighties-baiting, Stranger Things style, can bring a new IP up to relevance. But what about old IP’s that want to have a comeback? 

It’s kind of dificult to find another TV show that I could compare to Doctor Who. Most series that have been running for that long are mostly soap operas, that operate on slightly different rules, and are also targeted to a different audience. So as much as the movie series is still not exactly the best comparison, when I think about a big IP, campy sci-fi, family-oriented (at least in theory) on its path back to relevance, I think about Star Wars, obviously. The Force Awakens gambled on that nostalgic feeling and won big, but the next two movies, while still financially successful, were nowhere near the astounding success of the first one. And that’s because - you guessed it - it created the Event You Must See again, The Great Comeback, but merely two years later, the comeback became old news. So what we can gain from that is that nostalgia can create an Event as well as a new trend, if not better. But the question remains: how long will that last?

That is, after all, the main difference between a movie franchise and a TV series in the traditional, network TV sense of the word: movie franchise must bring in the viewership every year or two, and TV series must bring in viewers every week for at least two months. Is RTD’s Nostalgia Vibes enough to provide for that?

I’ll say this: I’m absolutely certain that the 60th anniversary will be very popular. I still don’t think it will break any records because, as I’ve been trying to explain for this whole post, it is not 2007 anymore no matter how much the tv execs would like it to be. But ironically, the almost-certain success of the special is the very thing that could undermine the effect of bringing their precious Nostagia Boi back onboard. Remember, the first Event Episode is The Big Oof. That’s the one that gets asses to the Good Ol’, if anything ever does. After the first big event one, that’s the point when things start going down. They’re wasting their Special Event Boi for something that already would be an event, dear fucking gods, I hate your plan and I would still execute it better. Either have RTD be the Anniversary Guy and then hire someone new, use that hype and keep it going, OR have RTD come in after the anniversary, then at least you get the Event Effect for the premiere of his first return season. Fukin’ amateurs.

But even if they did that, here’s the thing: do you think that the people who departed from the show years ago actually want to watch another three to five seasons of The RTD Show? I mean, I’m sure the thought warmed some hearts, for sure. A number of people will definitely gladly watch the anniversary, probably the first few episodes of the first return to the basics, but after that? In the world when, due to streaming, they have an easy way to revisit the actual thing they’re nostalgic towards? I honestly don’t think so. And you’re not really gonna get many new people by going back, if that nostalgia factor isn’t there. And then there’s casual viewers, the backbone, as we established. And here’s the thing: lots of those people don’t even know who the current showrunner is, cause they’re not Terminally Online like we are, and the second thing? Lots of those people ARE JUST NOT WATCHING NETWORK TV, IM SORRY GARRY. They’re just. They’re just not. I don’t know how to spell it out better. Even my mum has netflix now. Your biggest base is in another castle mate, gotta get moving and gotta get moving quick, cause here’s another thing: all the nostalgia in the world will not do SHIT for you if your target, people who were kids/teens when the RTD era was airing, PROBABLY DON’T EVEN HAVE A FUCKING TV ANYMORE CAUSE THEY MOVED OUT OF THEIR PARENTS FLAT AND LOTS OF YOUNG PEOPLE JUST DON’T BOTHER. Just. I’m sorry but you’re trying to resuscitate a decade-deceased corpse there buddy. It just won’t work. The times have changed and you gotta swim or drown, and it’s just not gonna be 2005 again, no matter how hard you pretend it is. It’s not your content it’s your business model. Just push more marketing for your iplayer or whatever, focus on streaming as your primary not your secondary cause that’s just what it is now, and maybe don’t rely on the viewer-counting systems of the yesteryear to evaluate your business. Or else you’re gonna get stuck sacrificing the creative growth of your show for a marketing strategy that probably won’t even fucking WORK.

There, I got it of my chest. Feel free to reblog, and also: you somehow got to the end of this, congrats! I’ll make numbers nerds out of y’all yet.

[ajaviary]

Shatter Me

Summary: One misstep and your carefully crafted world will shatter and reveal the truth you’ve worked so hard to hide. The ugly, shame filled void that you haven't been able to drag yourself out of. You never expect to be on his radar, a string of circumstances bring you two closer and unfortunately he’s drawn into your world.

Some Dark Content with mentions of physical & emotional abuse. Hints at self harm in later chapters.

Rating: M (Explicit) - 18+

Chapters: 1

Word count: 4168

A/N: Thanks for reading and feedback is appreciated. I decided to expand on my Vulnerable Piece, this is the first chapter of that expansion.

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You felt your phone vibrate in the pocket of your leather jacket, but you ignored it as you leapt back out of the way of a fist that smashed against the street. You frown, doing a quick glance at the civilians in the area, too many were still lingering at the intersection, all the cars stopped, but that wasn’t before some of them had swerved to avoid hitting you as you’d suddenly appeared in their way. Your litheal body tucked itself, the palm of your hand glowed for a moment before you were able to attach the small gemstone to the car in a form of a really strong molding and pulled yourself in a twist onto the hood effectively avoiding the prospect of being roadkill.

You were a little too pretty to wind up the bug on someone's windshield today.

The radio in your ear clicked on effectively telling you the eta of your team. Kamui Woods was on his way, he’d gotten held up about three blocks away and that was still long enough for the guy you were facing to cause problems if you didn’t hold his attention. You hoped down off the hood of the car, your boots walking over the torn up roadway. “Throwing a tantrum now, what are you two years old?” you wonder with a tease as you grin. You’re not just the Pro Hero Gemini for shits and giggles, no you had earned the name and it was rising in popularity and your recent joining of The Lurkers.

You were rising in popularity. It was through your hard work. Everything you did was because of your dream to help people, but you weren’t delusional in assuming it wasn’t going to be hard fought to claw your way to the top, you weren’t aiming to be number one, but you were going to do your best.

“All that effort to rob that bank and to think you almost got away with it too, if only it wasn't for that meddling little Gemini.” Your grin was wide as you watched the large man sneer at you, his body glowing a brilliant blue at the center of chest and the color expanded outward along hands and down his legs before he was suddenly rushing you.

So predictable, but then again this is hired muscle for you.

You darted to the left avoiding his swing as you cupped your hand along his ear with a hard slap of sound. The blow left him staggering to the side, but blood oozed out his ear down his cheek. You’d blown out his ear drum.

This sort of thing affects things like balance and depth perception. Not to mention regular things like one's perceptions of sound.

“Oh look at you, all weak in the knees.” Your laughter is enough that even if he can only hear it out of one ear, he’s raising his venomous gaze to you and throwing out a large hand to smack you down.

The crowd expected you dodge and weave out of the way, but their cheers erupt as the smoke clears and your standing there having taken the blow, unmovable as you’d anchored your feet, and your legs are reinforced with the gemstones that gave you your Pro Hero name, your arms raised to block the swing as you hold him back.

The crowd cheering for Gemini shouldn’t have been such a booster to your confidence, you shouldn’t be looking for recognition in the public, when you should get that in your private life too, but you didn’t. When you took off the mask, took off your hero costume you were left with a shattered, broken (Y/N). Your freedom fell away and with it your confidence.

You break in thought, in focus is what left you realizing too late that he’d only hit you as test, but he’d been charing his attack for something else as his wide mouth opened and blue energy swirled inside his mouth, your eyes widened and you knew you couldn’t block that move, couldn’t move out of the way either, not with the civilians clustered behind you.

Shinji Nishiya (Kamui Woods) showed up just in the nick of time, shouting out his special move. “Lacquered Chain Prison!” He throws out his arm as wood from his left arm and entangled the bad guy, his branches curling tightly over his mouth and noise and along his body forcing his hands to his sides and his body back away from you. The crowd was stunned for a moment in silence before their was the clicking of cameras and the sounds of cheers. You should have been upset by your mistake, you were and yet in that moment, as you had stared your death in the face, you were disappointed he hadn’t fired. It was that dark though that left you shaken to your core for more reasons than you wanted to look at right now. Instead you plaster a smile on your face and pull all the emotion you needed too into playing your role for just a little longer. Hoping Kamui hadn’t noticed anything that might give you away.

“I hope you have a good reason for being late,” you joke, poking him in the chest and he only stammers out an apology. He was a little too easy to tease.

“There was a- “ he paused, looking away. “There was a what?” You pressed, sly grin widening. “A cat, ” he mumbled, embarrassed. “that almost got run over in all the confusion,” he defended.

“I always knew you were a softy Kamui-Ichi,” You teased good-naturedly.

You squeeze his shoulder and the ribbing stops as the two of you were just discussing what you were going to do about the muscle head whose part of the crew in charge of a string of robberies lately.

The rest had slipped away in the chaos.

“We keep being a step behind, we have to do better,” your words are low and spoken so only he can hear you. It’s been no secret that this crew has been making a fool out of the heroes who wind up chasing them. They’ve been dubbed Resurgence, but it's their leader the mastermind behind each and every successful hit.

It didn't help that every time their scapegoat was caught he was effectively let go, with the team escorting him to Tartarus unable to provide any details on how it happened, their memories seemed to be altered and in some cases, completely wiped.

“Report Gemini, ” Edgeshot had arrived on the scene, you frown slightly surprised and yet not that your boss had shown up, it wasn't just your reputation on the line after all. He’d become increasingly frustrated that this group kept slipping through their fingers making quite the mockery of all involved.

You efficiently relayed everything that happened to the current moment. How you’d been patrolling and had stumbled upon them as they had fled. You gave chase, but in the confusion, you were left chasing Mr. Humanoid Godzilla over there. You should have been able to do more, you knew this was your fault, but if you were honest you couldn't be too upset. You were alive and that sentiment couldn't be shared with the others who faced them and were left in far worse shape than a scrap or two. You got lucky and you tighten your fist all, too conscious of that fact.

“Let’s double back to the bank,” Edgeshot advises and as a team you head that way it was only a few blocks and traffic wasn’t permitted to pass around the area. Mt. Lady was currently guarding Mr. Godzilla, you hadn’t bothered to remember his real name, it had been in the file this morning, but well you had paid more attention to his looks and his quirk than feeling it necessary to remember his name. It will come back to you eventually.

The bank doesn’t seem very special and you head for the door first as the others are talking a few paces behind you discussing possible scenarios. Your hand curls around the door and pulls it open just as the door opens fully there is a rush of heat and explosion as you’re thrown back.

Edgeshot had reacted by pulling you from the explosion, before you could get hurt by any of the buildings as it exploded outward. You react on instinct, even as you're pulled back into the air your body hardening, golden gemstones extruding from every visible area of your body, even as your fingers curl into the fabric of his shirt, as he pulls you closer. “Careful, you’re bleeding,” his voice was hard to hear around the ringing in your ears, but you nodded after a moment as he set you down in the middle of the street and the three of you were left to stare at the rubble of the bank as several other Heroes arrived on the scene to put out the fire, and help with clean up miraculously no one had been hurt.

Your phone buzzed again in your pocket and you swallowed as it vibrated again signifying a call coming in, your hands were clammy as you stepped away from your boss and put a little more distance between you. Your face grim as you were all too aware of the camera’s recording every second of your life. Your heart was pounding in your chest, he knew and he wasn’t happy.

--------

It was a few days later before you could convince Eizan to agree to let you go out with Nemuri at a bar she regularly frequented, you hadn’t been expecting any visitors, it was just supposed to be you and her and then you wouldn’t be lying. He always knew when you lied to him. Luck wasn’t on your side, not when two other Pro Heroes showed up, not when he'd shown up with Hizashi. The meeting hadn’t been planned, but they had been invited to join all the same, Nemuir didn’t realize the predicament she was putting you in, the danger. Nemuri knew so many heroes sometimes you were still left with your head spinning trying to keep up with them all.

Eraser overheard what you had said about your boyfriend, his most recent show up at your interview, how he’d been possessive, harboring a quiet anger over the fact that your interview had been a surprise appearance with you boss Edgeshot, you were there to dispel the rumors of any sort of romantic relationship, a picture that the was running had been of the two of you just a tad too close to each other, but there hadn’t been anything to it, but it hadn’t looked great either way, not when his arm had been around your waist as he’d used his quirk to swiftly curl around you and pull you out of harm's way, only to reform with his hand along your hip and your fingers carefully pressed against his chest, bleeding from a blow to the head. Shinya Kamihara had handled the situation well, and you had too, you knew what to do in these situations, but that didn’t mean the internet wasn’t blowing up either way.

After the interview you’d stepped off stage and Eizan had been there, chatting with your coworkers like it was the most casual thing in the world. Shinya had given him an accessing stare and looked to you, you gave a subtle shake of your head and he didn’t comment, but he wasn’t happy and you could have sworn you saw concern in his gaze when he’d left the station, but he hadn’t made a comment or a scene and instead let you handle it.

Aizawa had shared a quiet look with you before he left to get a drink at the bar before he and Hizashi would join you at the table. Leaving you to finish your conversation with Nemuri in private. She’d placed her hand gently over yours and softly told you that you needed to drop him, that he wasn’t safe for you to be around.

“He was just in the area, ” You grin widely as though to help ease her misgivings, hoped that your smile would be bright enough, convincing enough to hide the truth. You knew she had a right to be worried about you. It hadn’t been a secret that Nemuri wasn't his biggest fan when you guys had started dating. You had been too blinded by love to see him the truth and now you were in far too deep to get out.

You knew that, deep down you knew and the reason you hadn’t left yet was because you were in denial, and then deeper than that was the fear and then shame that you were in this situation in the first place.

It kept you up at night as you wondered what signs you had missed, this sort of thing happened to others, you saved people from abusive relationships and yet here you were in the exact same situation and it was suffocating. It felt like you were walking on a tightrope and it would snap at any moment if any more weight was put on your shoulders.

The conversation didn’t go much further into the subject once the boys came back. The night wore on and eventually you were the only one still sober, nursing a coke with some ice. Your limit was one drink, and that was it, you knew your limit and you had to protect the pretty glass house you had built. If you had a little too much, you would spill your guts to anyone who would listen. You dirty little secret exposed to the world.

Aizawa had stayed with you at the table and sipped his whiskey occasionally, his muscular arms exposed at the forearms as his dark grey long sleeved shirt was pulled up and he leaned his cheek against his fist. You hadn’t expected him to stay there once Nemuri and Hizashi went to play a game of darts as drunk as they were.

Instead you two had talked quietly about life, UA, the hero world and eventually movies and books. He’d warmed up to you after your animated telling of how Kamui had rescued a cat today and how you two had gone back and dripped the little guy off at a no-kill shelter after your patrol was over.

It was crazy for you to get along so well with anyone, most of all a guy who you’d just met, who didn't shut you up or seem like he wanted you to talk about something else. He listened to you, really listened.

You always had to be on, to say the right thing, to have your hero persona on.

This, this was just you, just (Y/N). No special title, just a young woman in way over her head.

“You should be respected and trusted,” the words were soft and you glanced at him, seeing the way he nursed his whisky, but wasn’t nearly as intoxicated as Nemuri and Hizashi as the two played darts in the back. “No man should own you.”

His words wouldn’t normally have caused tears to fill your eyes. You knew that, you knew that, but it was sort of like a wake up call. You blinked and a tear trailed down your cheek. You hastily reached up to wipe it away, an apology on your lips, but he beat you to it. His thumb brushed gently over your cheek as he wiped it away, you shouldn’t have leaned into his hand. It was just so nice, so warm. It wasn’t laced with possessive rage.

“Don’t apologize, ” he cut it, a soft smile curving up his lips.

You stare wondering if he can read your mind and he only slowly draws back and gives you a soft smile before taking a sip of his whisky.

The sounds from Nemuri as she lets out a screech of trumpet has you twisting on reflex toward the noise that he had ignored, but glanced toward once the laughter at Hizashi’s groan. You were just about to thank him for the advice; when fingers curl around your wrist and jerk you from your seat, you stumble in your strappy heels. Only barely managing to catch your feet.

Your mouth is shooting off before you can formulate or stop your words. “Who do you-” the words die in your throat as you take in the form of someone who has their fingers tight along your wrist and they only seem to tighten as he glares at the dark haired man with his hair pulled back into a low ponytail and tipped up, exposing his sharp features.

‘What is he doing here?’ You can’t help but wonder.

Aizawa who had set his glass down and was watching the scene with displeasure in his dark eyes and barely banked anger. He had been taught to respect women, he may have been brash, and inconsiderate sometimes, but he knew what not to do. He didn’t like what he saw, but he was giving you a chance to handle it. He didn’t want to step on your toes, but his hand tightened into a fist under the table, as the other was relaxed and curled carefully around the glass.

“Baby, I thought you said you were getting drinks with Nemuri, you didn’t mention anyone else would be there,” he pulled you closer to him, his grip bruising your slim wrist with the mark of his fingers. You wince, unable to help the movement...to hide it. This side of the abuse is what you desperately tried to hide from the world, you were (Y/N) (Y/LN)...the slightest negative news about Gemini could topple everything you’d been working so hard for. Everything you built and he knew that.

“These are friends of Nemuri, Eizan...her coworkers from UA High. Don’t embarrass me, please. People are starting to stare,” she dropped her voice at the last part, but it wasn’t low enough that Aizawa couldn’t hear every word. He’d also noticed that Nemuri and Hizashi were coming back to the table, Nemuri looked furious like she was ready to go to war for you.

“Embarrass you?!” he suddenly exclaimed loudly, as he jerked you closer forcing you on the tips of your toes, any higher and he’d have you off the ground as he stared with angry eyes down into your own. “Fucking seriously (Y/N)?” he sneers. “You’re embarrassing yourself out here dressed like that for all the men to see. Just trying to get a quick fuck, is my cock not good enough for you, now that you’ve gotten a taste of fame Gemini?”

For a moment you are stunned into silence, unable to formulate a set of words to go with what you had just heard and been accused of. You’d never cheat on him...that was then’t who you were. Guilt courses through you though anyway, as you wonder if you had done something wrong and then you were angry, angry because you hadn’t done anything!

‘You should be respected and trusted,’

Those words from earlier give you an unexpected rush of conviction in your next action, a rush of resolve. You dropped your weight and tried to gain back your footing. “Let go Eizan, just let me go! I’m out with my friends, you don’t get to act like an obsessive jerk!” Her gaze slid to the people who were starting to notice, and someone had their phone out. “Just go home, we’ll -” you fumble here, finally telling him completely what you wanted. “We’ll talk tomorrow.”

‘No man should own you.’

You can tell by the way his eyes widen he’d never expected you to attempt to turn this around on him, to make it out like he was the bad guy here, no he expected you to apologize like you always did. He was so hyper focused on you that he almost didn’t notice that Nemuri had come up on your left, her bare hand flush against his chest as she waited to shove him back or activate her quirk and put him to sleep and gladly watch him clumple to the ground. Hizashi was next to her, his hand on her shoulder, his eyes hard behind his glasses and Shota was on your right, his hand curling and tightening on his wrist, his grip was heavy, hard and held no remorse.

Eizan balled his hand and shot a nasty glare toward the man with long black hair. He was stronger than he looked, but now that he gave him another closer look, he recognized him. He was Eraserhead. Did everyone just think you were going to spread those pretty little thighs for them if they came to your rescue?

“You heard the lady, I suggest you take a walk before we get the authorities involved,” It wasn’t a threat exactly, there were plenty of other things he’d like to do, but Aizawa didn’t want to cause anymore of a scene, too many people were paying attention to them and some had heard your name dropped.

Eizan was livid and the look he shot Nemuri was murderous, it was clear who he blamed for this level of defiance. He smiled slowly and released your wrist and somehow that made your heart pound in your chest with a rapid cadence, so loudly it was all you could hear. It left you with such a stark fear, that you were sure something gave you away, because he slowly raised his hands, palms out in front of him. “We wouldn’t want any trouble, of course not,” he said passively, he gave up too easily but it was clear to you as he widened his smile in your direction for a moment before he turned and headed for the door he’d come in...this wasn't over.

“(Y/N)” Nemuri’s touch was gentle on her hand as she raised your wrist that had dropped to your side, the skin already darkening with a heavy bruise, one you knew you’d have to hide tomorrow. Her touch was so feather light you hadn’t felt it, still struggling to try and hear more than the pounding of your heart.

You didn’t wait to watch him leave, you were suddenly in a twist of limbs and legs as you blindly got some space as quickly as possible darting between your little group and shot for the restroom in the back, you didn’t run, but you moved with a stumble that was clear of the alcohol in your system. The shaking started the moment you shoved the door open, your arms curled around your shoulders as you shoved your fist against your mouth to silence the broken sob that tore from your lips.

No. No. No!!!

This isn’t over. You saw him, you saw him, you saw him!

Those were the only words your mind wanted to shout in your head as you flashed back to the look on his face, the dangerous glint in his eyes.

You were in trouble, you knew that, something bad was going to happen, something was going to happen, he was going to get even with you, he was going to hurt you.

“(Y/N)” the sound of your name spoken softly had you tensing, but you knew who it was, you knew the sound of her voice and somehow, somehow it made everything so much worse. You couldn't hide it now, everyone knew, everyone had seen.

It was another crack against your armor, another break in your chain, it exposed who you wanted so desperately to hide from the world.

Her arms were thrown around you as she drew you against her. “It’s going to be ok,” her words were soft and low in your ear.

Someone telling you everything was going to be ok, holding you with such care...it broke what tiny shred of your self control remained, your knees buckled and heavy soul wrenching sobs were expelled from your body as your fingers curled into the back of her shirt.

Nemuri sank to her knees when your legs gave out, she held you as you cried.

Outside Hizashi and Aizawa lingered outside the bathroom door, they had seen just a glimpse inside, but even the closed door couldn’t stop the sounds from escaping. Hizashi shoved his hands in the pocket of his jeans and looked up at the ceiling as he leaned his head against the wall. “What a night,” he muttered as he pressed his shoulder against his friends. Aizawa was silent for a long while, his gaze on the door, he was going over the night in his head looking for anything he might have missed. He knew leaving either of them alone wasn’t a good idea, not tonight...not for a while. Guys like that didn’t just give up. He sighed softly in the dimly light hallway. “Yeah,” he agreed as he let his gaze drift to the hand that he’d wiped your tears away with.

He knew he wouldn't be able to let this go.

[trashytummiez]

as for a specific idea for nightwing, the idea of doing a soda bloat or being stuffed right before going on patrol/going to go fight crime is very good uwu

"Unnngh, big belly burger before stakeouts...not your most strategic move, Dick..." Nightwing complained from rooftop patrolling the streets massaging his stomach gently. Even with that tight restrictive suit on his stomach was sticking and looking a little rounder than the usual rock hard abs Nightwing had. He exhaled a little puff and firmly rubbed into the sides of his aching belly while keeping an eye out.

It was so tight to the touch that it felt like a big rock in his tummy.

He was normally better about this but the special today was three jumbo belly burgers for the price of one. That wasn't a special he would ever pass up but was certainly starting to almost wish he did when his stomach churned painfully. One especially deep burble made him bring a fist to his mouth so he could hold in an incoming burp. It was a big one too because it was strong enough to puff out his cheeks and rumble pretty loudly in his mouth.

HuuUURRRRRRMMHP!!!!

Nightwing blew it off to the side and groaned miserably while gently patting his chest. "What I'd give for Tim to be free right about now..."

When no trouble arose Nightwing sprinted from the rooftops to other parts of the city making death-defying leaps from one rooftop to another. The acrobatics were second nature to him but right now such leaps were murder on his stomach.

"Unnngh, would it kill criminals to just take a vacation every once in a while? Jeez these guys work so hard at crime they might as well just work actual jobs...!" Nightwing complained.

His running and checking the streets was making his stomach cramp up even more and become noisier than ever. Nightwing was actually starting to worry if he did come across some criminals that his noisy tummy might give his position away before he could pounce.

But Nightwing persisted and kept his patrol going no matter how badly his tummy disagreed with him.

It was only going to get worse. Acrobatics were just part of the job for Nightwing so he never thought much of doing big jumps. They just came naturally before he could even think sometimes. And one rather big leap required him to jump even higher and land that much harder when he made it to the other side.

The impact shook his stomach up so much that he nearly puked on the spot. His face went green as Killer Croc's scales. One hand covered his mouth while his other grabbed his aching bloated belly firmly while it churned aggressively.

He saw a trash can near the rooftop stairway entrance and immediately rushed to it. When he opened the top he stuck his head in to throw up. Instead Nightwing burped so hard that it reverberated in the can enough to actually make it shake.

HuuuUUUUUURRRROOOOORRRRAAAAAAAAHP!!!!!!!

Nightwing gasped heavily enough that some drool dribbled out of his mouth. "Ooooooohhh god I needed that..." Nightwing huffed still looking green but at least not as bad as when he took that jump. "Hah good thing Jason isn't here. He'd get all competitive if he heard that one..."

His stomach was still swirling though making him feel awful. Nightwing hovered over the trash can again with his hand against his noisy distended stomach. Again he wasn't sure if he was about to puke or burp but got a relieving answer when a noisy grumbling burp erupted out of him. It was followed up with a smaller one that made Nightwing spit into the can and wipe his mouth clean of drool.

He had to take a break so he sat down on the rooftop resting his back against the side of the stairway entrance. Nightwing breathed in slowly which made his bloated middle expand and deflate a little in his hand. One hand rested against the floor for support while the other gently stroked the rounded curve of Nightwing's tight belly.

Nightwing looked up at the night sky letting the cool breeze waft over his tense body. The strain of his stomachache made him sweat bullets so the breeze felt even better. He was still breathing in slowly and trying to settle his stomach.

But any time his tummy churned really loudly Nightwing lurched like he was on the verge of losing his lunch. It would get so grumbly that Nightwing would try and force himself to burp so it would ease some of the pressure in his aching tummy. But every time Nightwing burped it would come out a little too strong and make him lurch like something was coming up with the gas. That would make his eyes go wide beneath his mask and cover his mouth while his face went green again.

Poor Nightwing was stuck in this loop of momentary relief followed by a wave of new nausea.

It was truly a vicious cycle and at this moment Nightwing was really wishing he settled for a late dinner instead.

Though he couldn't guarantee he'd do anything different the next time BBB had another great special going for it. Dick Grayson may have lived part of his young life as the ward of a billionaire but not even Bruce Wayne's guidance could ever steer his appetite or his inability to say no to a great deal.

But Nightwing knew he couldn't stay like this and knew that it wasn't going to get any better. So he bit the bullet. He rose back to his feet and approached the trash can again.

Only instead of waiting for his stomach to start churning anew he grabbed his belly with both hands and pushed into it. The feeling was absolute agony because of how tightly his stomach was cramped up. Nightwing burped aggressively into the can and kneaded his achingly full belly until another huge burp roared out of the can but was a bit wetter.

Nightwing huffed and drooled heavily. He gulped down some air like he would whenever trying to force up a burp and when he took in too much air he burped again only this time he burped so hard that halfway in a stream of vomit spewed out of his mouth and into the trash can. He spewed the contents of his stomach out into the can profusely and painfully for several seconds straight. When it ended he groaned breathlessly and miserably clutching onto the can with tears almost forming from the corners of his eyes. He grimaced and burped wetly into the can which only made more bile spew out. When he lurched again an even heavier stream of vomit expelled from his mouth disgustingly into the can for several seconds more.

He gasped heavily and spat several times into the can keeping his mouth open until nothing more came out. When he was sure the nausea had finally passed Nightwing curled up on the ground when it finally stopped. Nightwing wiped his mouth clean and groaned as miserably as his stomach did which was now looking a little less bloated.

His head was spinning but the relief was undeniable.

Nightwing just laid on the ground massaging his stomach and basking in the much welcomed breeze.

"Oooohhh god...next time I hit up Big Belly Burger I'm taking a night off," Nightwing mused. "Or bringing Tim and Barb with me..."

His tummy burbled softly in agreement.

[pyrefell]

Helllo!!! I’m loving your headcanons so far!!!

Do you have any general personalities descriptions for your boys yet?

a of all, bsdaifjkbfjkowp thank you!!! b of all, im sorry this took so long?? i rewrote it like 3 times & it still might change bc im indecisive. also it turned into a lil bit of a headcanon post. i hope its understandable?

once again i am struck with the fact that the boys need nicknames. hmm.

UNDERTALE:

Sans: Guy who is deliberately and unabashedly Cringe. Overall, fairly laid back. However, he still prefers to maintain distance between himself and most people. It was already a natural facet of his personality but it was exacerbated by the Timeline Jank. People tend to forget he’s as smart as he is, they don’t think he’s stupid, they just mostly know that funnyman side of him. If you're a dick to Papyrus, he's gonna be a dick to you.  

Papyrus: Things are so exciting and fascinating to him, even the most mundane things. Despite seeming completely oblivious to things that seem completely obvious, he's very smart and deceptively cunning. Even though he knows how people see him (a big loud child) and he doesn't get quite the reception his brother does, he knows he'll win them over one day! He tries to avoid thinking about how lonely he actually is. It’s fine. He knows Sans is dealing with something (he won’t tell him what) but he figures he doesn’t need much else on his plate.

UNDERSWAP:

Sans: In this post, I mentioned that he's kind of always naturally been the more outgoing brother and that he's taken on this much more outgoing and bubbly persona as a result of the impact the timelines have had on him. He's competitive in a more aggressive way (maybe not quite the right word to use but), by which I mean he's kind of a sore loser sometimes. Also? He's a huge flirt, he's pretty skilled in the art of flustering.

Papyrus: Also in this post, I said that he's pretty chill until the conversation turns to something he's passionate about, then he reaches True Papyrus Volume Levels (and Chaos Levels). He is fairly relaxed, yes, but part of it is compensating for how awkward he can be. He gets embarrassed really easy, even something as small as misunderstanding something that was said. However! He’s a pretty popular artist online! Though he uses a pseudonym, being recognized and talked to by a stranger in public is not something he would look forward to.

UNDERFELL:

Sans: He’s cruel and crude, that’s kind of his whole thing. He’s not really the best at keeping a hold on his temper (though there’s a few other factors at play there). Keeping up the whole tough guy persona is the number one priority thus he doesn’t deal much with his emotions or inner turmoil or any of that other crap. Like US!Sans, he’s a flirt, except his flirting is mostly crude comments and jokes. And yet, somehow it works? Guy who is a disaster. He’s oddly nostalgic, mostly about his relationship with Papyrus. He wishes he could have been a better brother, but it seems like their relationship is too far gone.

Papyrus: He also doesn’t have the best control of his temper but he has an image to keep, one of a cruel and cold Royal Guard Captain. He didn’t used to be like this, but it’s necessary for his survival. He’s still surprisingly empathetic, something that could never really be beat out of him. HUGE perfectionist nearly to the point of it being debilitating. He oscillates between hating how weak he is and desperately wanting to be able to be weak. While he acts prideful about his ‘work’ int the Royal Guard, he is genuinely prideful about things like his cooking. Often to the point of arrogance.

SWAPFELL:

Sans: He’s seen as very cold and calculating, well-spoken. But he also knows when and how to turn on the charm. That’s how he’s even made it this far in life, it’s vital to his survival. He can also be very prideful, particularly in his position as Queen Toriel’s right hand and in his ability to remain cool in high stress situations. He’s well aware of how overprotective he is with Papyrus, he’s terrified of how cruel the world is and terrified that he’s stunted him to the point of not being able to cope with it.

Papyrus: He’s deathly shy. If it were safe/a good idea to use his own brand of shortcuts to get out of situations, by god would he. He, like his non-Fell counterpart, thrives in the relative anonymity of being online. Past that barrier of shyness, he’s excitable and surprisingly jovial. He tries to find some reason to be at least content, he thinks it helps Sans worry less (even if it doesn’t really). He’s actually pretty mischievous, though only dares to pull pranks on his brother.

HORRORTALE:

Sans: Horribly cynical and jaded. He’s working on it, even if he doesn’t particularly want to sometimes. He’s not home, so to speak, most of the time. He’s easily frustrated by the gaps in his memory, then he forgets why he’s frustrated and gets even more upset. He’s naturally very wary of everyone else and again, very much prefers to keep distance between himself and most everyone he comes into contact with.

Papyrus: He definitely tries to hide everything behind a happy demeanor, he tries to fix everything for just about anyone (especially his brother) without any fuss and tries to make it seem like he’s totally fine. There’s also this sense of jadedness, he tries to curb it but sometimes it still slips out. He still tries to act like himself, like he’d been before the Famine, but it’s exhausting and he’ll eventually come to terms with the fact that he’s no longer the same.

HORRORSWAP:

Sans: His competitive nature has morphed more into him being more of an aggressive hothead (though not quite to the level of UF!Sans). He’s really self-conscious about his new stutter and bringing it up frustrates him the same way treating him like a child had before. He has terrible mood swings, he can ruin his own day over nothing and it kills him. He’s really trying to get better, but he still has a hard time being honest with people.

Papyrus: He’s gotten pretty cynical since the Famine, he puts part of the blame on himself (if only he'd just been brave for once), even though he knows there's not really a whole lot he could have done. He’s even quieter than he used to be, he’d prefer if he could just fade into the background. He hates how much he stands out in any crowd and tries to avoid going out at all costs. The only one who can get him out is Sans because at least they can ignore everyone else and concern themselves with each other.

HORRORFELL:

Sans: He’s...mean. Like. He tends to be a major jackass. He can’t help but think well, humans aren’t exactly gonna wanna know a monster, much less him. And hey! Might just help keep his newly expanded family safe! He ain’t complainin’! He’s really just bitter about how things have gone for him and his brother (and about how things will likely go in the future). For as many dark jokes he makes to Frisk and Aliza, he’d be the first one to come to their rescue, he’s just that kind of friend.

Papyrus: He’s fairly quiet these days, but don’t think he’s not going to find some way to give you some kind of attitude. He’s been putting a lot of work into taming his anger, which is no small task considering everything. He still has his moments, but he prides himself in being able to cool off and keep himself somewhat calm. He still hasn’t been able to do much about his perfectionism, in fact it’s gotten worse, but he’s trying. And he, like his brother, is extremely protective of his little family, and god help anyone who dares try anything.

A B-Bonus????

UF!Comic Papyrus: (he’s the only one with a nickname...lol) Reggie here struggles a lot with who he is as a person, is he more Sans? More Papyrus? An even 50/50? Or is he someone else entirely? He’s introspective and hyper aware of his mannerisms, particularity in the ones he deems too Sans-like or too Papyrus-like. He’s not exactly the nicest, partially as a mechanism to keep people away (it’s just...easier that way). Reggie keeps to himself most of the time. He’s not shy though, he’s more than willing to speak his mind, even if it comes out more crass than it was intended.

[mangaycompany]

do you have a favorite rare pair? if so, would you mind writing something that would induce me (and maybe others) to ship these? (I need more rare pairs content TT)

anybody who's ever talked to me at least once knows exactly what i'm going to say

i absolutely LOVE bantai / 万太

bantai isn't AWFULLY rare in the japanese fandom (it's kinda rare but i know worse, like jutai which i also really love), but it's INSANE how little people actually consider it in english :sob: i myself know exactly 4 people who are into it and it breaks my heart because i'm the only english speaking artist who contributes to the tag ever

before i start talking about it more, i'm going to link you to some things

the ao3 tag (in which 3 whole fics are by yours truly <3 they're bad though),

the pixiv tag (my favorite artist is hn, whose works i especially love because of their warm light-hearted stories, as well as their interpretations of the characters (i love how they tend to write 万>太 and 万>(<)太, you don't see banri be the one pining very often and i love it)),

my very self-indulgent spotify playlist (it might not be all that accurate but it's based on my own personal interpretation of characters, keep it in mind :'D)

anyway, time to talk to what just GETS me about this ship

initially i didn't think about it myself, because ANY banri ship will always be overshadowed by sehhyo/banju, but sometime in august last year i realized their dynamic is actually quite interesting

i love this rivalry air the two have developed, it's not quite like the rivalry banri and juza have going on, this one feels much more casual and like something best friends would have going on

there was something that touched my heart in act 3; when taichi confessed about his betrayal, banri was the first one ready to forgive him; he was the one who was willing to open up in order to make taichi feel more comfortable sharing his portrait with everyone

mankai stage

bestie behavior

and they kiß

headcanons

in canon, their bond might seem a little one-sided (we can't have everything :/ ), with taichi being always all over banri about how cool and popular he is, but trying to expand on that thought, i like to think banri's grown too used to taichi's compliments; the moment taichi switches to fawning over juza, something clicks in banri's brain that makes him annoyed with the whole world for the entire day

when they get together, it's something very new for both of them; taichi's never been in any relationship, he doesn't really know how to act around banri and fails to not make a huge deal out of it, due to his hopeless eagerness mixed with personal insecurities, it might keep their relationship stagnated and frustrasting for the first few weeks, he wants to do more and more couple things very badly but is worried about communicating it to banri (he doesn't know why, he can't name his fears really) / banri has been in relationships before, with people of all genders, so you'd think he wouldn't stress out about his new boyfriend all that much, but it's very much not true; he's been in so many relationships and yet this is the first one in which he genuinely fell in love with the other person. he's always found it difficult to be vulnerable and open up to anyone else, but it's something he'll have to overcome for his and taichi's sakes

each of them teaches the other important things; banri teaches taichi to be more confident and to not rely on strangers' opinions so muh, taichi teaches banri to be open and that it's okay to rely on your closest friends

you know banri gets Really jealous when taichi pays any attention to juza (and he obviously does because he looks up to him), but what you wouldn't think is that when taichi realizes it, he starts doing that on purpose just to get attention from his bf

you'd think it'd be hard for these two to keep their relationship a secret, but for the longest time, nobody even suspected a thing; for at least half a year, the only person who knew about them was omi, and it's only because he's taichi's roommate so Of Course He'd Find Out

i feel like they're a kind of couple in which they don't really Talk about their feelings (like love and insecurities) unless things truly require it (banri doesn't want to for obvious reasons, taichi doesn't want to pile it onto banri and make him feel like he HAS to also); for a long time they had a thing going on without even clarifying if they're really dating or not. they rely very strongly on their personal love language, which consists wholly of nonverbal love declarations such as small touches and meaningful glances

because of that, banri probably hadn't even said the word "love" long into their relationship (which must have made taichi cry like a baby when he finally did)

anyway

there's a Lot More on my mind but i'm very bad with words sorry

some other rare ships i love:

太九 [taikyu]: taichi/kumon (very soft and light-hearted :) high energy)

十太 [jutai]: juza/taichi (obvious for taichi's fixation on juza, very soft and delicate kind of ship)

十咲 [jusaku]: juza/sakuya (bond over shared love for acting, very warm and shoujo-esque kinda feel)

丞誉 [tasuhoma]: tasuku/homare (opposites attract, learning to understand each other, thriving off bonding over misunderstandings)

天十 [tenju]: tenma/juza (starting off with private acting tutoring, ending up with... developing a crush?! 😳 light-hearted and sweet, probably has the entirety of summer troupe trying to get tenma to make a move)

ships i'm not sure if they count as rare pairs and i dont feel like checking rn but i feel like i don't see them enough

万九 [bankyu]: banri/kumon

真円 [masumado]: masumi/madoka

東誉 [azuhoma]: azuma/homare

一臣 [kazuomi]: kazunari/omi

志九 [shifukyu]: shifuto/kumon

咲太 [sakutai]: sakuya/taichi

莇椋 [azamuku]: azami/muku

i hope you'll consider at least some of them :) thank you for your time reading this mess of a post

[gryffindorcls]

Plot Twist

Summary: Even though she still gets nervous around him, Marinette has been happily dating Adrien for several weeks. However, after agreeing to a mutual reveal with Chat Noir, Marinette postpones her date night with Adrien. Luckily, he also has plans with a friend that night.

Length: 7,178 words 

Hello, lovely readers!  This was written for the 2020 JV Art and Fic Trade on Discord. There is accompanying art for this fic by @supergirl9130.  Be on the look-out for it soon! Enjoy! 

(Shout out to my beta for this fic, @miss-congeniality-of-ml) 

— AO3

Fanfiction

Marinette snuggled further into Adrien’s embrace, relishing in his warmth. In response, he kissed the crown of her head and sighed.

If someone had told her six months ago that she would be in this position, she would have laughed, cried, and then laughed again. Never in a million years did she actually think that Adrien Agreste would ask her out on a date, let alone want to become her boyfriend.

“Are you still feeling cold?” Adrien whispered into her hair. “Do you want me to get you a blanket?”

She shook her head. “I’m okay.”

“You say that now, but you always get cold again when I let go.”

“Then don’t let go.”

“As you wish, my love.” He held her even tighter, sending her heart into a frenzy.

Much to her chagrin, six weeks of dating still hadn’t taken away all of the nervousness that she felt around him. She quickly discovered that Adrien’s love language was all of them; as a result, he constantly showered her with affection, gifts, and attention. While most of the time Marinette didn’t know how much more her heart could take before it exploded, she’d never been happier.

Ever the gentleman, Adrien never showed her anything less than boundless patience whenever she became a blushing, stuttering mess in his presence. If anything, he seemed to enjoy it, and that only made matters worse.

Whenever she had a “Marinette Moment” (as he affectionately called it from time to time), he would simply smile, pull her into an embrace, and whisper reassuring words into her ear. Sometimes, his soothing would work, but other times it sent her heart off to the races, leaving her to slowly melt into a hyperventilating puddle.

“Marinette, breathe.” Adrien’s hand was running up and down her back. “You’re turning redder than you usually do.”

She wanted to kick herself.

It had happened again.

She hadn’t even realized that she’d been holding her breath this time. Shaking herself back into reality, Marinette exhaled and buried her face against Adrien’s collarbone, relishing in the soft cotton of his designer t-shirt.

“Sorry,” she whispered, slowly feeling the embarrassment fade away.

“You know that you never have to apologize when this happens.” He kissed her cheek. “Like I would really complain about having another opportunity to hold you in my arms.”

“Yeah, but it happens all the time.” Marinette pulled away, bit her lip, and looked down at her lap. “Aren’t you getting tired of it?”

Adrien took her hands in his and ran his thumb over her knuckles. “Never. I love everything that makes you, you.”

Had it not been for the warmth that filled her chest upon hearing his declaration, she would have combusted again, but instead, she pulled her hands away and launched herself into Adrien’s arms. “You’re amazing. How did I get so lucky?”

He nuzzled his cheek against the crown of her head. “I ask myself the same question every single day. You are not only the best girlfriend I could have asked for, but you are also the greatest thing that’s ever happened to me. My only regret is that I didn’t ask you out sooner.”

Momentarily forgetting how to breathe, Marinette choked on her next intake of air. The coughing fit left her breathless and lightheaded.

So much for staying calm.

With sheer panic in his eyes, Adrien’s hands fluttered around her as she gasped for air. “Are you okay? Do you need water? What do I do? Please be okay!”

Taking a sharp intake of breath, Marinette managed to partially regain her composure. “I’m fine.”

The worry still hadn’t left his features. “You didn’t look fine. At least let me get you some water.”

Adrien hopped off of the couch and ran to the mini-fridge under his desk. Upon returning, he handed her a chilled water bottle and sat down next to her.

“Are you sure you’re okay?” He put his arm around her. “Did you choke on air again?”

She sighed. “No. It was your cuteness this time.”

“Oh, really?” The panic in his eyes melted away, leaving behind a dazzling smile. “Twice in one day. I’m on a roll!”

“You can’t just tell me that I’m the best girlfriend without warning me!”

“I can’t help myself. Complimenting you has become a hobby of mine.”

“Well, your hobby is going to kill me.”

“I highly doubt that.”

“I’m serious! You’ve watched me launch objects across the room and trip on air when I’m around you. One day you’re going to be so adorable that I’m going to get spooked and fall to my death or something.”

“You know I’ll never let anything like that happen to you, right?” Leaning in close, his breath ghosted her cheek. “I’ll always be there to catch you when you fall.”

The heat moved to her ears. “Adrien…”

Using his index finger, he tilted her chin upward and captured her lips under his. “Okay, I’ll stop.”

“Thank you.” Satisfied, she returned the gesture with an even deeper kiss, eliciting a contented hum from her boyfriend’s throat.

“For now.” His mouth curled into a Cheshire grin as he pulled away from the kiss.

With a pout, Marinette stood up and made her way to the opposite side of the couch. After crossing her arms and sitting down with a playful huff, she turned her head and stuck out her tongue.

“Marinette!” Adrien jutted out his bottom lip and pressed his hands together. “Please come back! The couch is getting cold.”

“Nice try, Agreste. Those kitten eyes won’t work on me!” Marinette looked away and pointed her chin in the air. “Have fun sitting by yourself.”

“NOOO! You have to come back!” Marinette choked back a laugh, and Adrien held his hands up in surrender. “Fine! You win, my love.”

“Good.” She crawled across the couch and resettled herself against his shoulder. “Now, hold still. I’m tired after almost dying.”

“Oh, so now I’m nothing more than a pillow to you? I see how it is.”

“Shhh! Pillows don’t talk.”

“GASP!”

Marinette snorted. “Oh my God...did you really just say the word ‘gasp’?”

“So what if I did?” Wrapping his arms around her waist, he pulled her back to his side.

“Who even does that?”

“I do!”

“You are such a dork.”

“And you’re surprised?”

No.

At least not anymore.

On their first date, Adrien had spent thirty solid minutes trying to balance a salt shaker on its edge while gushing over his new favorite movie. As she watched him hunch his body over the table, stick out his tongue, and maneuver the salt shaker into the perfect position, Marinette realized that the person who had been taped all over her walls was Adrien Agreste, the perfect model and son, not the boy who sat before her.

No, this was not the Adrien who went to photoshoots, took perfect pictures, and sat up straight during interviews. This was not the Adrien who smiled politely when approached and shook hands with powerful men and women. This was not the fabricated Adrien from the magazine quizzes whose personality was defined by his favorite color and the brand of shampoo he used to wash his hair.

This was the Adrien who had swallowed his pride and admitted that he didn’t know how to make friends. This was the Adrien who had seen a girl standing in the rain and sacrificed his comfort by giving her his umbrella. This was the Adrien who loved video games, whose eyes lit up when he saw a plate of cookies. This was the Adrien she’d fallen in love with, the Adrien she’d lost sight of when her mind had been clouded by infatuation.

That night, Marinette rediscovered what love meant. She’d silently cursed herself for getting lost in the glossy, ten-page spreads and towering advertisements that brandished his face, for jumping to conclusions without knowing the full story.

At that moment, she vowed to learn the full story, to truly get to know the Adrien behind the flashing lights and perfect etiquette. She’d dreamed of a life with Adrien, but in actuality, she’d only dreamed of a life with the idea of him.

Marinette didn’t know that she could love a person more than she already did, but at that dinner table under the soft light of a chandelier, her heart expanded to make way for all that she had to discover about her new boyfriend.

So yeah, he was a dork. A kind, selfless, sometimes clueless, wonderful, and amazing dork.

She smiled and tapped his nose. “No, and I wouldn’t change it for the world.”

He beamed. “Good! Because I’m not going anywhere.”

“And one day I’ll be able to handle your sweet nothings without turning into a puddle.” Marinette picked the water bottle off of the table and took several long sips.

“Once again, I will repeat this until the day I die. Your blushing is one of the cutest things on the planet. It rivals videos of kittens eating loudly and ducklings wearing hats. You’re absolutely purr-fect.”

Water nearly came shooting out of her nose. “Adrien Agreste, did you just make a cat pun?”

“Yup!” He looked so proud of himself.

All the nervousness from before disappeared, for if there was one thing she knew how to do, it was how to deal with a cat-pun slinging boy with a smug grin on his face.

“Is there a reason for the puns, or are you just trying something new?”

“I think you meant to ask if I was trying something mew.”

“Nope, that’s all you.” “Well, to answer your question from before, punning is a part of my purr-sonality. C’mon...just admit they’re claw-some.”

“Goodness gracious, just how many cat puns do you have in your arsenal?”

��I can go all night, Marinette.”

“And pray tell, where did you learn all of these puns?”

“I have a few cat pun websites bookmarked on my computer and my phone. I also have a cat pun translator app, and I bought a pun dictionary. But I put all of the best ones I find in my notes app.” He whipped out his phone, tapped the screen a few times, and held it out for her to see. “I’ve always liked puns, but the cat ones kind of took over.”

She bit back a laugh. “Who are you? Chat Noir?”

An indistinguishable emotion flickered behind his eyes before quickly being replaced by a mischievous glint. “Would that be the worst thing?”

No.

But something like that happening would be too good to be true.

Her partner was the best, and there was no doubt in her mind that whoever was behind the mask was brave, kind, loyal, and an all-around amazing human being, so it wasn’t completely out of the realm of possibility for the love of her life to be Chat Noir. However, Marinette knew that she wasn’t that lucky. At least the world had been blessed with two equally as amazing blond boys...who both apparently loved puns.

“Not at all.” She smiled and shook her head. “He’s a pretty cool guy.”

“R-really? You think so?” His voice uncharacteristically cracked on the last word of his question.

“Yeah, he’s my favorite hero.”

“Wait, really? It’s not Ladybug?”

“Nope. It’s Chat.”

And how could it not be? Her partner was incredible, and soon she would be able to tell him that not as Ladybug, but as Marinette.

Chat had been overjoyed when she’d suggested a mutual reveal. It was long overdue, and now that she was comfortable as the new Guardian, she was ready. It would make things safer for both of them to know. Not to mention she was excited at the prospect of being able to double down on their search for Hawkmoth.

Oh, how she dreamed of the day that Hawkmoth’s reign of terror came to an end! With her and Chat working together as both heroes and civilians, that dream might finally have the chance of becoming a reality.

If only Adrien could know about my life behind the mask, she mused, He’d probably be super helpful. Perhaps that’s something Chat and I could dis-

Her thoughts were interrupted by a piercing ring.

Adrien picked up his phone, turned off the blaring alarm, and sighed. “As much as I would love to stay here and cuddle, I have to go meet with my work friend now. Are you sure it’s okay that we’re skipping date night for this?”

Oh, right.

He was meeting with a friend today, as well.

She’d been worried about canceling her plans with Adrien, but he’d seemed relieved when she had brought it up earlier that week. When he revealed that he had also made dinner plans and needed to postpone their date, she couldn’t help but marvel at how in sync their lives were.

“Of course! It’s important for us to hang out with other people sometimes.” Marinette looked up at him through her eyelashes and smiled. “And we’re not canceling date night. We just moved it to tomorrow.”

“That’s right!” He grabbed her hand and laced his fingers through hers. “And to make it up to you, I will make sure that it is the most amazing date you’ve ever been on!”

“Even more amazing than the time you took me to Gabriel’s annual investor’s gala?”

Adrien nodded his head. “Most definitely.”

“Oh?” Marinette bit back a laugh. “And why is that?”

His face fell flat, matching the tone of his voice. “Because my father won’t be there.”

Giving in and falling into a fit of giggles, she held her stomach and doubled over. “Yeah, that would definitely do it! He made things so awkward when he demanded that you dance with that girl.”

“Sadly, it’s not the first time he’s done something like that. He’s always using me as a marketing tool with the investors. Let’s just say that having me spend time with a rich man’s daughter is one of my father’s many business tricks.”

“I’m sorry you have to deal with that.” She gave his hand a gentle squeeze. “At least he’s out of town for the next few weeks.”

“Yeah, thank goodness.” He leaned in and pecked her on the lips. “It means that I have you all to myself with no interruptions.”

The alarm on his phone went off a second time.

He took a deep breath and tapped the screen. “Except for right now. I really do have to get going soon.”

Marinette took her phone out of her purse and looked at the time. “Me, too. I told my friend to meet me at 6. If I don’t leave within the next five minutes, I’m definitely going to be late.”

“Same.” Adrien pocketed his phone, hopped off the couch, and grabbed his shoes. “So, where are you meeting up with your friend?”

“Oh, at some cafe I suggested. I went there with Kagami a few times.”

“Have we ever been there together?”

“No, but maybe we could go tomorrow! On our make-up date!” Marinette hopped off of the couch and slipped on her flats.

Adrien returned to her side and took both of her hands in his. “I’d like that.”

Marinette had picked the restaurant because she knew Chat would love it, and the more she thought about it, she knew that Adrien would probably love it, as well. “You know, you and my friend...you and he are really similar. I think the two of you would be really good friends.”

“And if we’re being honest, you and my work friend are so alike it’s insane. I guess there’s a reason why I used to be in love with her.” His eyes blew wide as he clasped his hands over his mouth. “I mean…”

Marinette took a step back. “The girl you’re meeting with today...she was the girl you-”

He frantically waved his hands in front of him. “No! It’s not like that anymore! I swear! I don’t love her...I mean, I do, but not like that. She’s like family? Also, she’s dating someone now. She only saw me as a friend, so it didn’t work out.”

“I always thought it was Kagami.” She collapsed back onto the couch, feeling her heart sink. “That means I wasn’t even your second choice. I was your third.”

Adrien scrambled onto the couch. “No, no! Please don’t start thinking like that.”

“But it’s true.” Feeling smaller than she’d ever felt, Marinette buried her head in her hands and pushed back tears that threatened to fall. “I’m sorry you didn’t wind up with either of the people you loved before me.”

“Marinette, I need you to look at me.” He carefully pulled her hands away from her face and held them in a steady grip. “You weren’t my third choice. You weren’t even my second choice. You were my always choice.”

“Your...always choice?” A tear slipped down her cheek and fell onto her lap. “I don’t understand.”

“You know what? Neither did I until the day I found out that you had a crush on me. Sure, I was in love with the girl I work with. It consumed me and didn’t let me think about anything else, but she didn’t want a relationship with me. I was heartbroken, and while I respected her wishes, I didn’t know how I could ever love another person the same way. Then Nino made his little slip-up, and I realized that I already did.” He leaned in and rested his forehead on hers. “I’ve been in love with you since the day we met.”

“But…”

“No buts. Please. I care about my work friend a lot, but I am in love with you. Yes, loving her was exciting, like fireworks, but loving you feels like…” His face softened, his gaze filled with adoration. “It feels like home.”

Her breath hitched. “Adrien…”

“Marinette.” The reverence in which he uttered her name set her entire being ablaze.

“You’re going to melt me into a puddle again.”

“Good.”

She wrapped her arms around the back of his neck and closed herself around him. Returning the gesture, he drew her into a tight embrace. With his chest flush against her own, Marinette could feel the pounding of his heart and the depth of his breaths.

When he pulled away, she immediately felt the absence of his warmth. She sniffled, and using his thumbs, he wiped away the wetness from her cheeks.

“Now go have fun with your friend.” He kissed the tip of her nose. “I want to hear all about it when I call you tonight.”

Marinette couldn’t stop the giggle that escaped. “Thanks, you, too.”

“And maybe the both of us could convince our friends to hang out as a group one day...you know, since we’re all so alike.”

“It’s funny. My friend used to have a crush on me, and I turned him down. It sounds like our friends wouldn’t just hit it off, but they might just be made for each other...like you and I are.” She couldn’t help but laugh as she pictured Chat and Adrien’s work partner meeting for the first time. “Too bad my friend is already dating someone.”

“My co-worker is dating someone as well.” Adrien chuckled and shook his head. “But for real, it sounds like they’d be a match made in heaven.”

“Wouldn’t it be funny if they were actually dating each other?” It was a ridiculous thought, but it felt good to laugh after crying.

Adrien nearly doubled over. “That would be the most insane plot twist. Their relationship would be like one of those romances from a movie or something.”

“Only if it’s a really cheesy movie!” She thought back to all of the times she’d dealt with Chat’s flirtations. “I know for a fact that my friend is the ultimate hopeless romantic.”

“You mean like me?”

“Well, I did say that the two of you were alike.”

“Then I must meet this classy gentleman friend of yours!” Adrien held a finger in the air as he spoke. “He and I shall be the best of friends.”

An infinitely more ridiculous idea popped into her head. “I just thought of an even bigger plot twist!”

“Let’s hear it.”

“What if you’re actually the friend I’m meeting today?”

“Well then, may I suggest the biggest plot twist of all? You and I are actually each other’s friends, and we didn’t know because until today, we’ve been dressing up in disguises every time we’ve met up.”

Marinette slapped her hands against her cheeks and feigned surprise. “Then that would mean that you fell in love with me twice!”

Yeah, it would! And it would also mean that you turned me down because you had a crush on me but didn’t know it.” Adrien flopped dramatically onto the couch. “My poor brain can’t handle the confusion.”

“Same. Can you even imagine trying to keep something like that straight?”

“Nope! As crazy and cool as something like that would be, I’m pretty relieved we don’t have to deal with that kind of mess in our love lives.”

“Yes! Agreed!” But you’re right. I do think that the four of us would have a lot of fun together! I’ll ask him about a possible group hang-out session. I’m sure he’d be down for something like that.” Marinette straightened her purse strap, bent down, and pecked Adrien on the lips. “I’ll talk to you later. Love you!”

As she walked towards the door and out of his room, she heard Adrien call out behind her. “I love you, too!”

Carrying his words with her, Marinette bounced with each step she took. She skipped down the steps of the mansion and basked in the warmth of the summer sun.

How could she have been so silly to think that Adrien loved her less than he did? Of course, he loved her! She could see it in his eyes every time they were together. She could hear it in the way he spoke to her. She could feel it in each kiss.

Adrien Agreste loves her just as much as she loves him, and there was nothing that could ruin the high that came with this knowledge.

Nope. Not a single thing could ruin her day.

She was in love.

Someone loved her back.

And she was about to reveal her identity to Chat Noir.

Marinette froze.

She was about to reveal her identity to Chat Noir.

What was she thinking?

She couldn’t do something like this. She and Chat were fine the way they were. Right?

Opening the clasp to her purse, she ducked into an alleyway and did her best to not hyperventilate. “Tikki!”

Her Kwami zipped into view. “What’s wrong? Is there an Akuma?”

“No...it’s just…”

“Yes?”

“Just…”

“Marinette, what is it?”

She clenched and unclenched her fists several times before finding the words to say. “I can’t do this. No, I shouldn’t do this. How could I have possibly thought that this was a good idea?”

“What?” Tikki squinted. “Are you talking about meeting Chat?”

“Yes! Didn’t you always say that we had our secret identities for a reason?”

“Yes, but that was before. You’re the Guardian now, and you’re supposed to know where every single Miraculous from the Miracle Box is at all times.”

“But what if-”

Tikki cut her off. “No what if’s! This is the right thing to do, and you know it!”

Is it? Worry still clouded her mind. Am I going to regret this?

“I don’t know.” Marinette fiddled with the strap on her purse, fighting the urge to turn around and run home. “What if everything goes wrong?”

“It won’t!” Tikki nuzzled Marinette’s cheek. “Also, I think you’ll be pleasantly surprised.”

“You think so?”

“I know so. Don’t forget...I already know who Chat Noir is.”

“That’s right! You do!” She cupped her Kwami in her hands. “Will you tell me a little bit about him? It’ll make me feel better about all of this. Please?” Tikki shook her head. “Marinette, you already know everything you need to know about him.”

“I do? But I thought the Miraculous magic was supposed to make that impossible.”

“The suit masks your features, not your heart, and trust me, you know Chat Noir’s heart inside and out. He’s never tried to hide who he was from you.”

“I guess you’re right.” She fixed her eyes on the pavement below. “But I’m still nervous.”

“And you think he’s not? He’s most likely freaking out as we speak, and it would probably make him feel a lot better if you actually showed up.” And once again, Marinette knew Tikki was right.

She had to do this.

If not for herself, for Chat. Her partner deserved the support that came with knowing her identity. She never wanted him to find himself in a position where he needed help from the Guardian and didn’t know where to find it. Chat needed her just as much as she needed him.

And now it was time to meet him.

Doing her best to shake off the sinking pit in her gut, Marinette smoothed out her skirt and straightened her back. “I can do this.”

“Yes, you can!” Tikki threw her tiny paws into the air. “This is so exciting!”

“Sure, if by exciting you mean that nauseous feeling in your stomach, but I can do this. I’m Ladybug.”

“And more importantly, you’re Marinette Dupain-Cheng. You’re the girl who’s an amazing designer, class president, and friend. You are kind, and you always stand up for what’s right.”

Marinette could feel her confidence grow. “That’s right...I am! I’m great in and out of the mask. Just like Chat is.”

“Just like Chat is.” Tikki smiled. “And I’m sure he would love to know your name.”

“And I would love to know his.”

“And all you need to do is walk into that cafe.”

“And find the boy wearing the black hoodie and the silver ring.” Marinette held up her purse for her Kwami. “C’mon, Tikki. Let’s go have dinner with the boys!”

“Boys?” Tikki cocked her head to the side. “As in more than one?”

“Are you telling me that you’re not excited to see Plagg without having to sneak around?” Marinette couldn’t hold back her laughter when she saw Tikki’s face light up before she enthusiastically dove into the bag.

With a renewed spring in her step, Marinette made her way to the cafe. Within minutes, she found herself standing outside the glass door, gripping the metal door handle. She took a deep breath, opened the door, and crossed the threshold.

A blast of warmth hit her face as she walked into the intimate dining space. She scanned the room and felt a rush when her eyes landed on a hunched figure clad in black.

Chat.

If it was indeed her partner, he was sitting at the far end of the cafe, facing the wall and scrolling through his phone. He had a hood pulled over his head, so she couldn’t see the color of the person’s hair. During their last patrol, Chat had divulged that his hair was actually blond so she would recognize him when she saw him. While this stranger wasn’t making it easy, there was almost no one else it could be.

And there was only one way to find out.

It’s now or never, Marinette. She psyched herself up as she walked over to the hooded stranger. Just walk up and ask…

“HEYISTHISSEATTAKEN?” Marinette slapped her hands over her mouth when she realized how loudly the garbled strand of words had come out. “I mean…”

The cafe had gone quiet, and she could feel all eyes on her.

This is a disaster. What am I doing? If this is Chat, he’s going to think I’m such a weird-

“Marinette?” A hand wrapped around hers, bringing her catastrophizing to an end.

Wait.

The hand was warm and familiar. “My sweet, beautiful Marinette. Come here.”

I know that voice.

The hand tugged her closer. “Come here, my love.”

Adrien.

A pair of green eyes filled with love and surprise locked with hers. “Fancy meeting you here.”

Her brain continued to short-circuit. “What are you doing here? And why are you hiding under that hoodie?”

“Ahhh, yes.” Using his free hand, he scratched the back of his head. “I’m meeting my friend here, and I really didn’t want anyone taking pictures of me meeting with a girl who wasn’t you and getting the wrong idea. Having another media presence conversation with my father is the last thing I need.”

“I totally get that. I remember you telling me about the last time your dad sat you down for one of those talks.” She smiled, but confusion continued to swirl around her mind.

She could have sworn it was Chat; however, she couldn’t have asked for a better outcome to her mistake.

“I know it hasn’t even been an hour, but I’m happy to see you.” A gentle kiss pressed against her knuckles. “So, what are you doing here? You’re not following me, are you?”

Marinette rolled her eyes and took a seat across from him. “No, my days of following you are far behind me, thank you very much, and I would appreciate it if you didn’t remind me of all my embarrassing pre-dating decisions.”

“They’re so cute though!” He rested his head in his hands. “I’ve never had someone care about me as much as you do before.”

“Adrien, stop!” Her cheeks started to burn. “My friend is going to be here any second, and I can’t look like a tomato when he shows up!”

“Ohhhh, so that’s what you’re doing here! Wow...what a crazy coincidence!”

“You want to know an even bigger coincidence? My friend said that he was going to be wearing a black hoodie when I met up with him. I thought he was you.”

Adrien leaned back in his chair. “Wait...really?”

“Yeah.” Marinette nodded her head. “He said that he would be wearing a black hoodie with a silver ring. He wanted me to be able to recognize him.”

“Hold on.” He opened and closed his mouth several times before continuing. “Have you never met your friend in person before?”

“Uhhh.” Panic started to settle in her gut, but luckily she knew how to keep a straight face. “Well, it’s complicated.”

“Is it?”

“Yeah, we've met in person, but our outfits were kind of weird.”

“Uh-huh, and what’s your friend’s name again? I don’t think you ever mentioned it.”

“Umm...you see, we’ve only been using nicknames, so I’m not totally sure.”

He held up a hand. “So let me get this straight. You two don’t know each other’s names, and there was a chance that you wouldn’t recognize him because you were dressed weird every time you saw each other before today.”

“Yes.” Marinette looked away. “That’s right.”

“And I’m guessing that means that you gave him something to look for to help him know that it’s you?”

“Yes.”

“What is it?”

She swallowed, sincerely hoping that she wasn’t giving too much away. “My black earrings.”

His eyes immediately locked on her ears, sending him into a near trance-like state. Several emotions passed over his features before his eyes grew wide.

“Oh my God.” His voice was barely a whisper. “Oh my God.”

Her cheeks grew hotter as his unrelenting stare continued. “I-is there something on my face?”

“It all makes sense now.”

“Why do you keep looking at me like that?”

He grabbed her hands from across the table. “I was close a few times but you always shook me off your scent. You’re so clever, but I guess you already knew that.”

“What are you talking about?” She pulled her hands away. “Adrien, I don’t understand.”

“You’re joking, right?” Without breaking his stare, he leaned in and curled his mouth into a smirk. “Oh wow, you’re not.”

The panic and confusion that clouded her thoughts began to melt away as her annoyance grew.

Why would Adrien freak her out like that and then...laugh?

He was laughing.

Why was he laughing?

“Would you care to share what’s so funny?” she asked with a huff.

He wiped a tear away from his eye as he attempted to compose himself with several deep breaths. “I just can’t believe it!”

“Can’t believe what?”

“Marinette.” He got up, walked around the table, and knelt in front of her. “Don’t you think it’s interesting that you’re waiting in this cafe for a boy in a black hoodie and you ran into me?”

“Yeah, it’s a funny coincidence. Great minds think alike, right? Wait...speaking of friends.” Her eyes scanned the cafe. “My friend still isn’t here.”

“I guess we’ll have to do this a different way then.” Adrien stood up and grabbed his phone off of the table. “Can you do me a favor?”

“If I do, will you finally tell me what’s going on?”

“Yes, but I think you’re going to figure it out soon enough.”

“Fine. What do you want me to do?”

He pulled her onto her feet. “I’m going to go call my friend because she’s not here yet either. While I’m gone, could you call your friend, as well?”

“What, no!” Marinette did another scan of the cafe before turning back to Adrien. “I have to stay here in case he shows up. If he gets here and I’m not here, he’ll think I stood him up.”

“He won’t. And don’t you want to see if he’s okay?”

She bit her lip and watched as a pair of giggling girls walked through the door. “Yeah, I do.”

Relief washed over his face. “Thank you! And then when our friends get here, maybe we could all eat together?”

“And you’ll tell me what’s going on?”

“Yes, I promise that if you haven’t figured it out by the time we both return, I will tell you everything, but you’re going to facepalm when I do.”

His sincerity calmed her agitation. “We’ll see about that!”

Adrien laughed again and disappeared into the men’s room. Following suit, Marinette pushed open the door to the ladies’ room, checked that she was alone, and transformed.

Before she had the chance to pull out her yo-yo and make the call, it started to ring.

She grabbed the device and held it up to her face. “Chat, where are you? Are you okay?”

“Can you meet me on the roof?” She could hear a hint of mischief in his voice.

"Right now?"

"Yes."

“Why?”

“Purr-lease, my lady? Do it for me?”

"Is this something I'm going to regret?"

"Nope! I purr-omise. Cat's honor!"

She rolled her eyes. “Fine.”

“Awesome! See you there!” Before she could respond, the line went dead.

Great.

Now she had two boys who were acting weird.

After finding a window that was big enough for her to squeeze through, she leaped through the opening and hooked her yo-yo around a chimney. With a tug of the wire, she flew into the air and landed on the edge of the roof.

“Hey, Ladybug!” She whipped around and was met face to face with the most excited-looking Chat she’d ever seen. “Fancy meeting you here.”

“You asked me to come up here, you silly cat!” She sheathed her yo-yo and rested her hands on her hips. “What are you up to?”

“Even after saying the same opening line? Really? Nothing?”

“Chat, what are you talking about? I swear, between you and my boyfriend…”

“Your boyfriend?”

“Oh, right.” She pressed her pointer fingers together. “So, my boyfriend is here, and he’s also waiting to meet with a friend, but he’s acting all weird right now...just like you are. But anyway, I know that today is a big deal for us and we have a lot to talk about, but since he’s already here and I don’t want to make it any weirder than it already is, do you think it would be okay if we ate dinner with my boyfriend and his friend?”

He took a step closer. “That sounds like a lot of fun. I would love to.”

“That’s a relief! I was worried you’d get mad and say no.” She paused for a moment before continuing. “But we may have to get our stories straight before we go back in there. I kind of told him that we only knew each other by nicknames until now, so unless we want to tell him that we’re the heroes of Paris, we should do the reveal here.”

“I couldn’t agree more.”

“Oh, and one more thing. My boyfriend is kind of famous? He’s Adrien Agreste.”

“The model whose face is plastered all over the city?” Chat’s expression was unreadable. “Does that mean you’re the girl from all his Instagram posts?”

Marinette hoped it wouldn’t be a problem. “Yeah, that’s me. He’s wearing a hoodie so no one recognizes him, so I hope that’s okay.”

“That's fine with me.” He took another step closer. “So, would you like to do it on the count of three?”

“Do what?” They were so close.

“Drop our transformations.”

“Right! We should do that!”

He was now inches away from her. “On the count of three?”

“Sounds good to me.” Her heart hammered against her chest.

This was it.

It was now or never.

She took a deep breath and counted with him.

“One.”

“Two.”

“Three.”

They spoke their detransformations at the same time, and Marinette’s brain ceased to work as the magical green light left her boyfriend in Chat’s place. Taking a step back, her foot slipped off the ledge, and everything went in slow motion as Adrien yelled, grabbed her hand, yanked her back onto the roof, and fell with her into a heap of tangled limbs.

Without letting go, Adrien sat up and pulled her into his lap. “Are you okay? Please tell me you’re alright!”

Still stunned speechless, all she could do was nod.

“See? I told you I’d always be there to catch you when you fall.” He gave her a once over before wrapping his arms around her and holding her against his chest. “Sorry, I thought it was a good idea. I should have moved us to the middle of the roof.”

Her brain began to sputter back to life.

Adrien was holding her.

And Adrien was Chat Noir.

Which meant Chat was holding her.

Which meant…

“I’m in love with Chat Noir.” Her voice was barely a whisper.

“Yes, you are.” He rested his mouth against the crown of her head. “And I fell in love with the same girl twice. Best. Plot twist. Ever.”

Marinette thought back to earlier that day, a time that now felt like a thousand years ago. “How did we not see this?”

“I don’t know, but now it all makes sense why you never agreed to go to the movies with me as Chat Noir. We were too busy living in our own movie.”

“We have so much to talk about.”

He held her even tighter. “Yes, we do, but we have a whole lifetime to talk. Let’s just enjoy dinner tonight.”

“Dinner sounds perfect.” She let all of her muscles relax and allowed herself to melt into his embrace. “I’m surprised you’re not freaking out right now.”

“Oh, trust me, I am, but I’m just going to focus on how amazing it is that my girlfriend and my lady are the same person and worry about the rest later. How are you holding up?”

“I’m still processing, but there’s a good chance that I will freak out and scream into a pillow later.”

“I’m looking forward to it.”

“What makes you think that you’ll be there to see it?”

“What makes you think that I’m going to leave you alone tonight?”

“And how do you plan on doing that after I go home after our date?”

“I was thinking that purr-haps a certain cat could come and visit you on your balcony? It sounds a lot more interesting than a boring phone call if you ask me.”

Of course, they were the same person.

It all made sense now.

This was Adrien. This was her Chaton. This was her best friend. This was the love of her life. This was her everything.

“Fine.” She pulled away and tapped his nose with her pointer finger. “But the cat has to bring hot chocolate if he wants to stay.”

“Deal!” He leaned in and rested his forehead against hers. “And may I just say that I am so excited for our next patrol.”

“Oh, no…”

“I wonder what the pictures on the Ladyblog will look like when Alya captures Ladybug turning into a blushing, stuttering mess after Chat Noir flirts with her!”

“Don’t think that I won’t end you just because you’re cute.”

“Awwwww!” He nuzzled her nose. “We can be cute together!”

“I said it before, and I'll say it again. You’re going to be the death of me, Adrien Agreste.” She buried her face against his hoodie and shivered.

“Nope! Not on my watch.” He got up and lifted her into his arms, prompting her to squeak. “Let’s get you warmed up inside.”

As he called for his transformation, Marinette found herself unable to look away. Here he was, holding her like she was his world, ready to do seemingly anything for her.

How did she get so lucky?

“Alright, hold on.” She braced herself against him as he leaped into the alleyway below.

He set her down on the ground and called off his transformation once again. After telling Plagg to join Tikki in Marinette’s purse, he took her hand and began walking towards the cafe.

Before they reached the door, Marinette stopped in her tracks. “Hey, Adrien?”

“What’s up?” He turned to look at her. “Did you want to go somewhere else to eat?”

She shook her head. “No, that’s not it. I’m just really happy that it’s you.”

“Oh, Marinette.” He pulled her back into his arms and dipped her into a kiss. “I don’t know what I did to deserve this, but knowing that it’s you is the greatest thing that’s ever happened to me.”

“I thought having me as your girlfriend was the greatest thing that’s ever happened to you.”

“Life would be boring if that stayed my favorite thing. Besides, if we’re going to be together forever, do you really want to stay just my girlfriend?”

“We’re only sixteen, Adrien.”

“And that means that we have many, many years to experience even more plot twists and greatest moments with each other.”

His declaration warmed her from her head to her toes, but to her surprise, she managed to keep herself composed and stutter-free.

“I guess that means we’re still in this together? Just you and me?” She snaked her arms around his neck.

“Always.” She couldn’t help but smile as he kissed her again.

[mashiraostail]

Hi! Can I please get, Hizashi, Aizawa, Midnight and Toshinori comforting an S/O who had a really REALLY bad day? Maybe S/O comes home the door closes and they just start sobbing? How would our babes comfort them (Gender Neutral S/O please!!)

yeah!! I hope ur day wasn’t bad when u sent this omg hopefully this is helpful! ): under the cut!

Hizashi- You were just exhausted, it was one stupid mishap after another, and you were so miserable it made you physically sore. All you wanted to do was go home and go to sleep, you knew you should shower, clean up a little, you assumed like you looked as awful as you felt. But you couldn’t, it was so much all at once and all you could think about was letting it fester in bed alone in the dark where nothing could annoy or bother you for the foreseeable future.  Though you forgot about one variable, and are reminded of it the moment you open your front door.  Hizashi.  He’s just lounging around the living room, it was probably a rather quiet Thursday night to everyone but you and he seemed to be enjoying the tranquility. He was sitting on the floor by the table, he had a little keyboard synth resting in his lap, and headphones haphazardly over his ears. He looked content and comfortable and so very in his element that you realized you’d been so upset all day that you’d forgotten about him.  Now all you wanted to do was lay in the dark with him. Listen to his voice, let him comfort you, be close to him. If anyone could make you feel better it was him. Honestly, you don’t know why you start crying. But you feel the tears welling up the minute he looks up at you.  “Hey hot-...stuff.” He’s standing up and bridging the space between you the second he realizes you’re crying. Of course he’d call you some stupid silly nickname, of course he’d just be normal Hizashi, of course he would.  “Babe, what’s up?” He’s standing nervously in front of you, jittery to the point of hilarity, he clearly wanted to touch you but didn’t want to upset you more, you could tell in his face that he didn’t know if it was him you were upset with, or something else entirely. You rub at your eyes, trying and failing to ebb the flow of tears down your cheeks and when you finally look at him you actually feel sort of guilty at how upset he looks on your behalf, like his whole heart just broke.  “Zashi, please, can I just have a hug?”  The pride that had been dwindling at his uncertainty of the cause of your tears seemed to instantly swell back up again. “Yeah! Yes! Come on! Get in here babe!” He pulls you in tight, pressing your wet face into his neck. The way you hold onto him, the tightness, the hand in the back of his hair, all of it makes him wobble with affection. But for you, it just made the dam crack. You felt safe, and warm, and surrounded by him, and that comfort turned what was previously a few exhausted tears turned into full-body wracking sobs.  “Jeeze baby did you miss me that much?” He’s squeezing you, tight, pressing scattered kisses to the side of your head, face, temple and ear, whatever he can reach, the arms around his neck, your hair, it didn’t matter as long as it was kissable and to him all of you was kissable. He can feel the big blobs of salty tears against his neck and shirt collar, he can feel them smear against him as you nod, wet exhausted laughter slipping out of you.  “I did.”  “You’ll blow up my ego babe.” He warns you as he presses his nose into your hair, “I hope you didn’t really miss me so much that it made you this upset...I’m always a phone call away babe.” He pulls you out of the crook of his neck and wipes off your face with his palm, “you looked like a kicked puppy.” His eyebrows twitch up desperately, “please babe you’re breaking my heart here. What’s wrong?”  You shake your head, “I’ve just had the most...awful day. I was so miserable, and it was just one thing after another, I couldn’t catch a break, even on my break something went wrong somehow.” He’s nodding along with you, ever intent. “All I could think about all day was coming home and just going to bed. I’d been so worthless all day that I didn’t even think about how nice it would be to see you, and when I finally did and you were just sitting there and you looked so comfortable and I just wanted to be with you. I wanted to be close to you and all at once it was like I went from wanting to lock myself up alone in bed to I just wanted to be near you.” You shake your head again, harder this time, “and then when you hugged me it was just so...I was so relieved. I’ve wanted to cry like this all day but I didn’t feel like I could and now-”  “You’re gonna make me cry please-” He’s squeezing your face, “you’re so sweet. You look exhausted.” He’s pulling your face up to his peppering a few kisses to your lips. You just sigh, relieved, it felt good. “What do you want me to do?” He holds your arms, “more hugs? Kisses? We could watch a movie?” His hand goes back up to your face, wiping away the tears again, “you shouldn’t cry so much you’ll get sick, and your eyes will be all puffy and sore tomorrow.” He’s squeezing your face again, “you look cute when you cry though. Like a sweet little baby-”  “Shut up.” You snort, shoving his chest. He looks so relieved to have just made you laugh a little. “Can you just go back to what you were doing?” You ask, hands landing on his chest.  “It wasn’t anything very interesting.” He insists, “we can shower and call it an early night if you want-”  “No it’s okay, I just wanna sit with you.” He looks like he’s gonna explode. “Of course..” He starts taking off your clothes though.  “Zashi I-”  “I know, I know.” He shushes you and keeps going until you’re standing in the middle of the living room in your underwear.  “Was that fun for you?” You cross your arms to cover yourself up. Though it doesn’t last long since he shucks his own teeshirt off and pulls it over your head, “isn’t this better? Come on let's go sit down.”  You spend about an hour sitting behind him, arms wrapped around his abdomen, cheek resting against his back as he tinkered with the synth before him. When you ask to go to bed he doesn’t protest, he just says of course, you go ahead he’ll be there in a minute. 

Aizawa- Nothing else could go wrong, honestly, the last thing that could get fucked up would just be you dropping dead right there. You were supposed to be home hours ago and you were sure your trashed phone had more than a few missed calls and texts from Shouta who’d probably waited up for you. The thought of seeing him now felt like the best thing in the world. He’d listen to you talk about your shitty day for hours and just agree with you he’d just hum and nod when you said you felt like the only person walking around with a brain sometimes. What you didn’t expect though is to feel so thoroughly relieved the moment you stepped foot inside, and finally caught sight of the man. It was like a thousand pound weight just dropped off your shoulders, like for the first time all day your lungs could expand and take in a good full breath. There was a pile of papers beside Shouta, and he was looking over them with minimal interest, long hair pulled away from his neck, a pencil sticking out of it, holding the dark mass in place miraculously. Even the way he sat was inviting to you, like every time he shifted or moved it just an invitation for you to curl up and get close. “Hey, welcome back.” He pulls the back of the pen away from his lips as he looks up at you, “You’re really late today is everything-” When he gets a good look at you though he doesn’t feel the need to finish his question.  “Yeah. I’m sorry I’m late.” You don’t know why you’re biting back tears, he wouldn’t care if you cried, he’s seen it before.  “It’s okay.” He waves you over and moves the pile of papers out of the way. “You look like you were really busy.” He could see the tears welling up in your eyes, he knew the helpful thing right now would probably be to get the dam to break, you look like you really needed to cry. “You’ve got a twig in your hair.” He reaches over and pulls it out.  “Thanks-” Your voice breaks and you take deep shaky breath. He can tell he’s just about there. He can practically see your foundation creaking. “You... don’t look like you feel very good.” He squeezes your shoulders, “talk to me. Tell me what’s wrong so I can fix it.” Yeah, that does it. There you go. Crying like a baby. He’s kind of proud of himself and how quickly he gets you to let down that wall. You practically tackle him but he accepts it, he sees it coming a mile away.  “Bad day?” His hand on the back of your head just makes you cry more. He honestly was expecting a little cry, the exhausted maybe a little petulant, ‘I just want today to be over’ sort of crying, but what he got instead was full-on bawling.  He was sort of taken aback. “Bad day feels like an understatement.” He amends and you just nod ferociously into him, the harsh scruff on his jaw was a grounding comfort whenever it scratched your skin. “I just had a really...terrible day.” You shake your head, arms coming tighter around him, “a really really terrible day. Everything just kept going wrong and it feels like it’s all always my fault like I should have known-”  “you shouldn’t blame yourself for the mistakes of other people.” He reminds you, a comforting hand between your shoulder blades, “mistakes are just mistakes anyways. There’s rarely a problem that can’t be fixed.” “I just want to be helpf-”  “I know you do. And you are.” He promises, feeling your hand fist in the back of his shirt, “you don’t give yourself enough credit, I’m sure without you around today would have been a lot worse for your colleagues. You always pick up so much slack. You work so hard just to turn a blind eye to all your effort.”  “I could have done more, I wasn’t even the last person to leave today I-”  “I bet you were the first person there.” You’re silent to that. “I’m proud of you for working so hard, you’re going to accomplish some really great things, even if you don’t feel that way right now. But you need to give yourself more credit if you beat yourself up so much all the time you’ll stop feeling passionate about your work.” You knew he was right, he was always so level headed, he always made perfect sense, he always knew what needed to be said.  “Either way though, it’s over now. The terrible day from hell can stay outside in the hall. It’s not allowed in here.” You laugh a little bit at that and the ebbing of tears is a bit of a reprieve to him. “What can I do to make you feel better?”  “I already feel a little better Sho, really.” You pull away and wipe your face off, he’s looking down at you sympathetically.  “You look miserable.” He leans down to your lips anyways, and it’s a nice kiss, relaxing, tender and soft, it’s the kind of kiss that makes you drowsy. “It’s pretty late already. To be honest I was worried when it started getting dark out and I still hadn’t heard from you. Why don’t we call it a night? I can grade this stuff later, it’s not like they’d be looking for it, and I’m pretty sure they wouldn’t notice if I never returned it.” You chuckle at that too, “I think you underestimate them sometimes.” He hums at that, “no not where it counts.” He takes your face in his hands, “how about a hot shower, some water, and a lot of sleep?” You nod at that, “that sounds good.”  “You look exhausted. He picks a leaf out of your hair, “jeez, what kind of trouble did you get yourself into today?”  “You don’t wanna know.” You groan and he replies to it with a breathy chuckle, “let’s just get you cleaned up, I bet just that alone will make you feel 100x better.”  And he was right. It did, it felt like all the shitty things from today swirled down into the shower drain with the soap and all the dirt it’d washed away. It felt like you were getting a new start. He seems pretty proud of how quickly he’d gotten you to bounce back. He sends you off to bed and promises to be there as soon as he finishes cleaning up his stuff in the living room, but by the time he gets into bed you’re already fast asleep. 

Nemuri- You had to be the only intelligent life on the planet. That’s what you were saying to yourself as you jammed your key into your front door. It was like no other being you’d crossed today even possess the capability for though and your workload practically quadrupled from it. You had no idea how you were meant to get all of this done and all you wanted to do was go home and never have to think about anyone you’d seen today again. Your inability to say no just preceded you and it felt like everyone had taken advantage like all people ever did was take advantage. It was equal parts infuriating and disheartening. You wanted to be good and helpful but people just took advantage, played dumb, and pawned all the work off to you. It was like no one on the whole planet even appreciated a single thing you did and-  “Well there you are angel, I was starting to worry you got kidnapped or something.” Nemuri is grinning at you, “you’re never this late, honestly I was starting to miss you. Are you okay? It’s not normal for you to be so late-” Nemuri did, Nemuri appreciated everything you did and she always missed you when you were apart and she sent you all sorts of funny texts and voicemails when you couldn’t see each other and Nemuri would never treat you like that. The relief of that makes your heart feel ten times lighter in your chest and all you can do is cry about it.  “You’re right..silly question.” She swings her legs off the couch and waves you over to her side, of course, you go wiping the tears as they stream down your face. “What’s wrong? Was it something I said?” She frowns at you and you just shake your head and wave her off. “No not you... it’s..” You whine into your hands and she hums at you sympathetically, putting a hand on either of your arms.  “You had a bad day then? Or something else?”  “A really...really bad day.” You hiccup and let her pull you forward, she wraps her arms securely around you. “That makes me sad.” She rests her cheek in your hair, “is it salvageable?” She rubs your back, “can we fix it?” She wonders, “would talking about it help?”  “it’s just so unfair, I want to be nice, I want to help but I always take on an unfair amount and everyone takes advantage of me. I’m terrible at saying no, but why can’t people be mindful of that? I’m so mindful of everyone else I don’t see why they can’t extend the courtesy to my weakness-” She hums along and nods every few words, you feel her shift against you.  “You can’t help being a big softie can you?” She squeezes you, “you’re so cute. I just adore you.” That shouldn’t make you cry any harder but it does. You felt sort of stupid, childish even, you knew Nemuri didn’t see you like that, she’d had her fair share of bad days since meeting you and she’s acted similarly, but still.  “Oh angel I think you just need to cry it out for a little don’t you?” You just nod into her shirt. “Okay then. I’ll stay right here while you do.” You feel her lips against your head and she leans back onto the cushions of the couch. “I could talk about something else?” She offers, “do you wanna hear about my day?” You nod again, “yeah..that might- help-” You’re hiccuping helplessly and normally she’d find it to be sort of cute, but in your current state, she found it a little distressing. Either way, she talked quietly into your hair about whatever came to mind from today, some of her students, the papers they’d handed in, one of her student’s continued inability to spell ‘democracy’. After a few minutes the tears prattled off, and all you were left with was a massive headache and a puffy red face. When you finally do pick yourself up Nemuri isn’t sure if she wants to scream, cry, kiss you, or do all three in an indiscriminate order.  “You're so cute.” She takes your face in her hands, “do you feel a little better now?” Her thumbs are wiping over the wet skin, “look at you, you even look good when you’re crying. It’s like in a movie or something-”  “I’m probably a ballon-” Your laugh is quiet and tired but it’s a laugh at least.  “A very cute ballon.” Nemuri clicks her tongue at you. “It’s late isn’t it?” She reaches behind you and procures a bottle of water, though it seems like she’s taken a few sips from it and it’s not freshly cold. “You should drink some water, it’ll help your headache.” You do as she suggests because she was right, and now all you wanted was for the dull throbbing behind your eyes to stop.  “Go get into bed.” Nemuri kisses you when you pull the bottle away from your lips and you hum into it appreciatively, “I’ll bring in some aspirin for you.” She pulls back and you nod, you didn’t have it in you to protest that it wasn’t actually that late, still hardly 11. “I’ll take extra good care of you tonight.” She assures you as she stands, she takes your wrists and pulls you up, “that way when you have to go back tomorrow you won’t feel so overwhelmed.” She squeezes your face in her hands, “there’s still a whole hour left of today, I bet I can salvage it for you.” 

Toshinori- Exhausted was the understatement of the millennia. You could drop dead where you stood if you stopped thinking about staying alive, you were sure of it. You even slipped out early because you couldn’t tolerate staying any longer.  You slump against the door as you close it, just being home alone was enough to make you feel a million times safer and you can already feel the tears welling up in your eyes. You were so focused on your shifting emotions you didn’t even notice Toshinori sitting on the couch until he spoke.  “Hey.” He’s sitting up straighter at the sight of you, you’re sure you look as terrible as you feel and Toshinori was always good at picking up on your feelings. He’s standing up, crossing the room to get to you.  “Toshi-” You’ve never been so happy to see someone, to have someone pull you into the chest, he encased you in his warmth, his presence wrapped around you just like his arms did. It takes a moment, the warmth and comfort of him accosted your icy emotions, but once the two touched you felt like you were melting away, It came out in your tears.  “What’s wrong?” His voice is so quiet, and soft, physically soft, it hits you like a pillowcase full of feathers. “You look so upset.”  The way you fist up the back of his teeshirt in your hands like you were desperate to just be closer, begging him to come as close as he could, to wrap you up and melt away all the ice, like warm spring sunshine hitting a frozen pond, you wanted him to surround you like sunlight did every time you stepped outside. And he could tell, he could feel it.  “I’m right here, hey, I’m right here with you. I’m here now.” He’s holding the back of your hand with one large hand and cupping the small of your back with the other. “Whatever it is is over now. It can’t bother you anymore. I’m here. Please don’t be upset. Tell me how I can help.”   “You’re perfect-” Your voice wobbles with your tears, “Toshi please-” You warble and can’t help rubbing your face into his shirt.  “Please what?” His thumb rubs the base of your skull affectionately, “whatever you want. What do you need?”  “Just stay-” You voice cracks and you feel him lean into you at that.  “Of course I’ll stay with you...let’s sit down okay?” He pulls you away and takes your jaw in his hands, tilting your head up to see you better. “I know you’re upset, but try not to cry so hard okay? You’ll get sick..” He leans down enough to press a kiss to your forehead, “and seeing you cry so hard makes me really upset, that’s probably selfish of me to say but I can’t help it. I just wanna help you feel better.”  He walks you to the couch and you’re more than happy to fall into his lap.  “I just had a really bad day.” You scrub your face, “terrible, long, awful day.” One of your hands absently curls a few blonde strands around your finger and Toshinori hums at your explanation.  “Well it’s over now.” He holds the base of your skull when he kisses your forehead, “it’s just me and you.” You were holding his free hands with yours and you nod.  “Do you wanna talk about it?” He offers, murmuring it into your forehead.  You shake your head, “it was just a bad day..”  “Why don’t you get comfy here and go to sleep for a little?” He pulls you into closer still and you wrap your arms around him, maybe you will. Exhaustion was seeping into your vision and the kiss he leans down into doesn’t do anything to help. It makes your stomach and chest buzz warm, all you want is to get closer and then even closer, to kiss and kiss and kiss until you couldn’t open your eyes in between them and you dozed off into a comfortable sleep against him. He was happy to oblige you. 

[fundielicious-simblr]

(This is going to act as an update post on Zoe and her family, I'm trying to be more proactive about talking about the other kids in the 'heir' families that aren't the main characters. This also makes it so that I can do smaller updates when I do the big holiday family updates, so that the post itself doesn't become a dissertation 😂)

(Zoe's POV)

How fast time flies! Life in Oasis Springs with little JJ has and is fun, over time he’s made leaps and bounds with all of his learning and potty training. Whilst I helped teach my siblings, it definitely feels different with your own child. Every spill and accident means we’re just that much closer to having him be fully potty trained, which will be a big win for the both of us! We’re working on fluency with colours and letters, and after those are down we can start with bible memory!

(rest is under the cut! - got too long 😂)

With Francisco going off to work during the day, it took awhile for me to get used to being alone when we first got married. After having JJ it made it easier because I could just dedicate all my time to him during the day, my sister Priscilla moved closeby, so we’d see each other whenever we had the time. Now she’s got a baby of her own, we’ve been having to coordinate schedules to see each other. Annette comes down to see Priscilla for some twin time, and while she’s in town she’ll drop in to see JJ and I. It’s great getting to hang out with my younger sisters and being able to invest in their lives and keep our sister bond strong. Annette isn’t married yet and has no one she’s interested in, so she keeps herself busy with babysitting for the mothers in our church as well as investing in the lives of others and volunteering at various church camps. When she isn’t doing that, she’s visiting the siblings that are spread out everywhere, soon she’s planning a trip to see Beckett and Mandy out in Selvadorada on a short missions trip.

It’s great getting to sit down with Francisco when he comes home and getting to hear all about his work day. Obviously there are loads of things I don’t understand about his work with the military, but he’ll tell me what he can whilst explaining the complicated jargon. Sometimes he’ll get sent on short training expeditions out into the desert which have me worried sometimes, as you never know what can happen out there, but he always reassures me that he’ll be back safe and sound.

I’m still working on my music, I play at our church on the weekends so I’m always looking for ways to arrange the hymnals. In the new year I’ll be teaching at a music camp hosted by my parents church, so I’m working on different pieces for that. I’m almost done arranging a piece for a new recording that I’m doing for a small hymnal EP, so when JJ is doing his extended play time, I’m practicing on the keyboard that is in his room. Sometimes he’ll come and watch me play and is captivated by the music, it’s such a blessing to see his little eyes light up at the sound of music, I can’t wait until he’s old enough to begin learning.

Francisco and I had talked about expanding our little family and were excited to see what the Lord had in store for us, there were 2 or 3 times that I hoped I was pregnant but received a negative pregnancy test. To be really honest, it was very hard to want something and get a negative test result. I’ve spent time calling my mother and having her comforting voice was such a blessing to me during my quite teary phonecalls where I’m sure she could barely understand a word. After seeing my mother have baby after baby every year, and now seeing my sister and sister-in-law have children quite easily, admittedly it was hard to be content in my struggle whilst also being happy for everyone else. There were many times I ran to the Lord in prayer for contentment, and for patience as I wait for what he has in store for me, and it helped calm my heart.

It’s been great seeing Francisco as a father, he’s in love with parenting JJ and being a good example for him. He takes initiative with both correcting JJ and having a good teaching moment, as well as being the fun dad who loves to play outside. He tries his hardest to make sure he can come home and read JJ a bedtime story, but if he can’t make it then I gladly read to JJ at bedtime. 

My sister Annette was over visiting when I felt like I should take a pregnancy test, and praise the Lord it was positive! I’ve prayed and prayed over again for this moment, and now that it’s here I feel overjoyed! Telling Francisco was the best part, he was so excited for us to grow our family. We took these pictures to announce to our friends and family about our new addition that will be joining us this winter.

With the joys of pregnancy come the trials, and by that I mean morning sickness. I’ve got it much worse this time round than I did with JJ’s pregnancy, meaning that on bad days Francisco has had to step up and do things that I would usually do. Good thing his mother made sure that both her boys knew how to cook and do their own laundry when they were teenagers or else this would be another trial for us to endure 😂

Another new thing I’ve had to get used to with this pregnancy is the size of my belly, with JJ I only really started showing in the 2nd trimester which is standard with your first baby. With this baby it seems that I started showing as soon as the pregnancy test came out positive, and since we know there’s only one baby in here, their positioning is more frontal that JJ was. 

This pregnancy came right on the tail end of our time here in Oasis Springs, Francisco got his new orders and he’s being stationed out at a base near Windenburg! He got promoted right before his time here was done, so we all got to dress up and head to the ceremony, I must say, I love seeing him in his uniform! Living by Windenburg means I’ll be close to my sister Amira who lives there with her husband, I love that being able to move around every 2 years means that I get a chance to see different friends and family more regularly as the years change. When we’re on our way to Windenburg we’ll be stopping by newcrest for Harvestfest with my family, it’ll be so good to see everyone again before we head out to our new home for the next 2 years!

                                                            💛

(AN) The accidental irony in this post being military themed wasn’t planned but is unfortunate considering the recent events. This post would’ve gone up on Saturday the 28th, but unfortunately time and circumstances meant I couldn't bring myself to do much for a bit as well as not having access to my laptop. Early on saturday morning I found out that a girl that I knew was one of the marines killed in the Kabul attacks. I’m not in the military, I’m not even American, but she was stationed at the base in the country where I live and were deployed to Afghanistan from here not too long ago. Being a civilian I wasn’t as close to her as some of her fellow soldiers but we saw each other when my friends and I would hang out with our military friends on the weekends, she was truly a kind soul and her death as well as the others have shattered everyone’s hearts. It’s so jarring having to deal with the fact that a person that you used to see almost weekly is now gone, I jumped back into tumblr as a form of distraction and am hoping this helps keep my mind busy. My condolences go out to all the families and friends of those who lost their lives this weekend, and to everyone affected by these losses, please reach out to get help if you need it. May they all rest in peace. 

[fanfoolishness]

Interview with a Fic Writer

Tagged by @novantinuum, thank you!

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How many works do you have on AO3?

242 works. The actual fuck??? Wow, me. Of course, this does span about 9 years, so I guess that's not that insane?

What’s your total word count on AO3

549,737! But that averages out to only 2271 words per story, haha. You got me! I think I have less than 10 fics that have more than 1 chapter. I love one-shots, what can I say?

How many fandoms have you written for and what are they?

Oh, you want to get into this? All right. We'll get into this:

The X-Files, proto-fandom, ur-fandom, first OTP ever... yeah, 15-year-old me went. WILD. Many horrible Mulder/Scully stories, and some Doggett/Scully and character study stories as well. Mostly not very good, but with occasional flashes of decent writing. Really had a difficult time writing romantic feelings between 30+ year-olds given a) I did not date in high school and b) was 17 and not an emotionally stunted FBI agent.

Buffy the Vampire Slayer - not a huge volume of stories, but definitely some very angsty Spuffy and Spike tales.

Harry Potter - just one published fic (Lupin grieving Sirius), and one with Snape and Harry having a heart to heart I could never quite get right.

Then came the dark times (vet school) where I was exhausted and hard at work for a few years and I thought, horribly, I might have outgrown fandom. Thank god for...

X-Men First Class and the undying love of Charles Xavier and Erik Lensherr! I'd never fallen for a slash ship before but my god I fell hard for this one and wrote my first fandom smut and my first real AU (mutants with zombies) that I never finished.

Then.... let's see...

Quantum Leap drabbles!

Two Avatar the Last Airbender fics!

Agents of SHIELD fics, mostly focused on Coulson and FitzSimmons, and super angsty.

Bioshock Infinite sads (god I love writing the sad bad dad)!

And then the juggernauts of Mass Effect (my longest fic to date with 30 chapters!) and Dragon Age, which were endlessly productive and are still productive given the variety of different protagonists you can create, different choices, and different relationships to canon characters. I'm still working on a Hawke/Varric fic in the back of my mind here.

There's one random Gravity Falls fic (wish I could have got a little more obsessed with it, or gotten into it while it aired) of Stan sads, and one tiny Avengers ficlet of a sad Tony and Peter.

There's one Wheel of Time fic! Dammit I wanted Rand and Tam to reunite so much sooner than they did.

40-odd Steven Universe fics! So many SU fics!

One random Schitt's Creek fic of David and Patrick!

And finally, The Mandalorian, with 47 fics. Phew!!!

What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

1. The Invitation, The Mandalorian. Din Djarin finds himself in dreams that seem realer than real, reminding him of his loss, but he begins to find a sense of hope again. A promise is kept.

2. The Outstretched Hand, The Mandalorian. Din Djarin is a man of action, but sometimes, the quiet finds its way in. Din reckons with the aftermath of the events of Chapter 14, the Tragedy. (My very first Mando fic!)

3. Not the Sentimental Type, Steven Universe. Priyanka Maheswaran has long prided herself on keeping her emotions in check. But a mother's love can only grow, and sometimes it expands to people she never anticipated. Like the Universe boy.

4. Translation, The Mandalorian. Din Djarin was a man of few words, but many languages. Some might have thought the Child had no language at all. Din Djarin and the Child grow to understand each other.

5. Full Disclosure, Steven Universe. Just as the world begins to recover from Spinel's attack, Steven starts having nightmares. The more he ignores his fears, the worse they become, until he's left with no other choice but to ask for help. (My thoughts on what would drive Steven Universe Future, and I wasn't far off.)

Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

I really try to! Even sometimes years later if I realize I've missed some. I appreciate each and every one, and have definitely made friendships through comments <3

What’s the fic you’ve written with the angstiest ending?

Oh, hell... I'm too lazy to link these but if anyone wants to read them let me know or find them on my AO3!

A Stopped Clock from Bioshock Infinite has Booker DeWitt ravaged by Korsakoff's amnesia from his long-standing alcoholism. Is Columbia real or imagined? Hard to say.

The Viscount's Way shows Varric Tethras having become his parent, and a cruel, hard viscount of Kirkwall.

Songs in the Key of Red shows how Cullen fared under the dark future in Redcliffe in DAI, and they write happy endings, don't they? shows what happened to Varric. Both horribly depressing in different ways!

Two by Two, Hands of Blue shows a not unexpected end to lyrium addiction :( Poor Cullen, he got a lot of angsty developments, didn't he?

Do you write crossovers? If so, what’s the craziest thing you’ve ever written?

Never really got into crossovers or AUs. Just... meh for me!

Have you ever received hate on a fic?

No, I don't think so.

Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

Charles/Erik, Shepard/Garrus, Shepard/Liara, Shepard/Tali, a mess of different f/f femShep drabbles, and most of my Dragon Age pairings have gotten sexytimes. On the other hand I helped start the NoRomo Mando tag for the Mandalorian to help find non-pairing Mandalorian content. Depends on the pairing and the fandom, for sure.

Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Nope, thank goodness!

Have you ever had a fic translated?

I think so! There used to be a Spanish-language wiki linking to some of my old X-Files stories XD

Have you ever co-written a fic before?

No, but friends and I definitely will beta each others' things to help with sticky points.

What’s your all-time favorite ship?

ALL-TIME? Just, why? So many ships I loved in years past turned out to have pretty damn problematic elements I didn't see at the time, so it's hard to say... Mulder/Scully actually has a ton of issues, Buffy/Spike obviously has issues... so maybe Hawke/Varric (except not canon!) or Garrus/Shepard or Brosca/Alistair.

What’s a WIP you want to finish but don’t think you ever will?

Still need to finish my Hawke/Varric fic for after Adamant! I have 3 chapters written that I haven't posted. Maybe posting them will help inspire me....

What are your writing strengths?

Dialogue and POV writing from different characters; I feel fantastic writing Steven and Greg, though totally at sea trying to write from Connie's POV, randomly. But I think my dialogue and emotional beats are what people tend to tune in for. When I do write romance, it's usually very sweet and silly and pulled from life. I also love writing nature scenes and settings to help establish mood. Mood and emotion and catharsis are my bread and butter, and I like my poetic prose.

What are your writing weaknesses?

What the hell is a long, well-thought-out plot? Like what even is that???? My longest fic with 30 chapters is basically "Shepard has PTSD and hangs out with her crew. They have some funerals." THAT'S IT. How the heck people actually come up with plot that ties into the lore of a fandom I genuinely have no idea and it's the biggest thing that's held me back from finishing original work. I can come up with a setting and characters and then trying to make them do stuff that's more than just talking to other characters and deepening their relationships with them... how the fuck???

I also definitely have 10-20 words that I am in constant danger of reusing like every other paragraph, LOL!

What are your thoughts on writing dialogue in other languages in a fic?

I don't speak any other languages so I always avoid it as much as possible. I've seen people describe sign differently in fics and picked one way to depict it that made sense to me for Grogu, but that's about it.

What was the first fandom you wrote for?

The X-Files, of course!

What’s your favorite fic you’ve ever written?

Towards Another Day, the tale of how Cullen went from being a templar in Kirkwall to commander of the Inquisition, is definitely up there.

Reverberations is one of my rare multi-chaptered fics and one of my favorite for the catharsis at the end. It makes me tear up every time. 5 times Din and Grogu encounter the Dark Side, and one time they find the Light.

Either a world for the birds (Steven develops a closer relationship with his Uncle Andy, learning birdwatching along the way) or on the subject of rocks (Steven and Jasper finally reach a peace) might take the prize for favorite SU fic.

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Tagging (if you’re super bored and would like a fun thing to do) fellow writers:

@lastwordbeforetheend, @runrundoyourstuff, @honestlyhufflepuff, @art3mys, and @fake-starwars-fan if you would like to play!