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#something we are diametrically opposed on
nemiza · 9 months
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podcast where its just interviews with people who have an ok/completely average relationship with their dads taking 30 minutes to an hour psychologically analyzing everything wrong with said dads
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petorahs · 1 month
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Aventurine and Sunday doomed soulmates in a yuri way... does no one else get the vision...
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enlitment · 4 months
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In honour of the EU Parliamentary Elections, let me briefly interrupt the staple frev/classics posting and tell you about the terrible, beautiful insanity that is the Czech political scene.
Okay, so we have three brothers who are all in politics, except each of them is in a party that is diametrically opposed to the other two.
The most famous one of them is a notorious right-wing populist who made his fame by running on the 'I hate foreigners and immigrants' platform (even though he's half Japanese)
The other one would almost be a decent guy, except he is a member of a Christian party that continues to push for 'traditional values'
The youngest one is a gay architect who aligns himself with what is arguably the most progressive party on the current Czech political scene
I know it sounds like something straight out of a sitcom, but I swear that I'm not making this up
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Randomly thinking about grrm’s deconstruction of knighthood in asoiaf and how ironic it is that the Night’s Watch - an organization known to be half full of murderers, rapists, thieves, and all sorts of criminals - is essentially in charge of defending all of humanity when shit hits the fan. Like westeros just scrambled ‘the lowest of the low’ together into a penal colony in the far north and is totally fine depending on them for their survival; though tbf, i guess part of it has to do with expecting these societal ‘others’ to give their not so valuable lives for the good of the realm, who really cares if they live or die because they’re out of sight and out of mind. And it’s kinda funny too when we factor in the kingsguard because it’s a far more respected institution than the NW presently, but it too has its fair share of monsters. Quite a few men of the kingsguard have been morally bankrupt individuals, and we even see how the men of the KG sometimes forget other people they should be responsible for because their one priority is the king (we see what happens when you put the people of the realm first and then are ostracized by it a la Jaime tho there’s more to it). Missing the forest for the tree is something both institutions share, making them quite similar. So it’s interesting how grrm flips the fantasy classic of the black knight vs the white knight. The black knight is often anti-heroic, if not straight up villainous, and is often made to be diametrically opposed to the valiant and ever good white knight. But asoiaf has white and black knights both be shown of great virtue and great vice. The white knights in this story really are no better than the black knights. I’d love to see how these two entities could intersect, i.e., what happens when a white knight eventually changes his cloak for a black one (*cough* Jaime *cough*) and how that falls into grrm’s deconstruction of the romance of chivalry, the extent of personal heroism, and perceived knightly virtue. Welp I don’t even know what point I’m trying to make anymore, I just wanted to talk about the KG and the NW because they’re really cool.
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seirindono · 2 months
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TMS - Author's note (Arc 1)
Today I'm stepping up to talk about TMS for a while. It's going to be a lot of blah blah, no TLDR, so hang in there or save it for later if you're brave enough, haha (¯▿¯)
So, another chapter of TMS draws to a close, with the difference that this time it's a whole saga that's coming to an end! That's a big relief for me, given that we recently celebrated the comic's 4th anniversary! That's almost the entire duration of my college life, and that's both an impressive and terrifying achievement lol.
The comic is divided into 3 arcs, each separated by an interlude. The first runs from part 1 to 8, with 201 pages total (wow!). In it, you are introduced to Mel, a young skeleton with a rather unclear past, who accidentally arrives in a a foreign timeline, along with other well known skeletons. Nowadays it's just an isekai haha. Throughout the arc, she proves to be a cautious Monster, quiet and somewhat withdrawn compared to the other skeletons we come across, notably Rus, Blue and Axe, who each got their own sequences.
Still, Mel in the last few scenes is starting to show more initiative, and the interlude will make this even more obvious, but we can expect her to open up a lot more during the next Arc, about her past, motives, goals and thoughts.
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I could go on at length about what's in store for us in the interlude, but given that it's due for release sometime in 2024, I'm going to talk about the general story line instead. Although we follow Mel who is foreign to what's going on in this universe prior to her arrival, the other characters and events suggest that strange phenomena are taking place in Ebott, leading many people to become embroiled in a highly unusual affair. Crossing timelines, earthquakes, mysterious apparitions in the forest, something is afoot and the situation seems to be at a turning point when Mellow gets here.
Everyone has their own way of dealing with the situation and what to do next. Some are serious and pragmatic, like Black, others optimistic, like Blue, and others, like Papyrus, find themselves completely backed into a corner, forced to do their best to fix whatever needs to be.
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A special case, however, is Axe, whom Mel meets in the forest as she investigates Mt. Ebott. The two have diametrically opposed views of their current condition. One wants to return to her world by any means necessary, regardless of the advantages of a peaceful world. The other, not so much. Both refuse to talk about their past and ignore the other's circumstances, but a sense of familiarity drives them to try to convince the other to stay or go. These are two stark positions to reconcile, and while we can expect Blue and the other skeletons to have their own views on the subject too, Mel and Axe are strangely "committed" in this interraction and resort to violence, spurred on by a unknown substance that causes Axe to momentarily lose control.
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Mel is wounded, Axe unconscious, and the status quo disrupted. Other consequences follow this confrontation, and several questions are raised: Can Blue really help Mel when Axe accuses him of having already given up on going home himself? What is this mysterious entity Axe came across a few days earlier? The vibrations? What was that substance that made him go berserk? And what made him stop? Can we trust Mel and what she tells us? And many others.
Because as I'm sure many of you have come to realize, Mel has proven to be a rather unreliable narrator (or at least character since you don't follow her actual POV). Blatantly lying or omitting facts to others and readers alike, it's hard to know her next move and whether she's genuinely forgotten important infos (for it's well established at this stage that she has hazy memories and that they continue to deteriorate. The same applies to her health).
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In the same way, each part of TMS so far has raised more questions than it has answered, but I can confidently say that the road is paved for Arc 2 to answer and put in perspective most of them, ahah.
Ah, this is also the moment when I can announce that ALL skeletons will be featured in the Interlude. Should be. Hopefully.
I'd also like to point out a few narrative changes for Act 2! The central characters, in particular. Original cast characters such as Undyne, Metatton and a veiled character will be more formally introduced, but we'll also meet up with characters we've already bumped into, but in a much more concrete way, such as Frisk and Alphys. I can't wait for you to get to know them! You can also expect more pov changes, more elipses and so on. Things are moving fast.
But that begs the question. When is it due? As said before, the first Arc lasted 4 years and I'm entering my last (and most crucial) year of college. I still don't know if I'll have time to get much of it done in 2025, but on the other hand, I'd like to strike while the iron's hot lest TMS be discontinued after a 1-year hiatus and my entry into the working world. Student loan, life and all. There are still plenty of things I'd like to bring to this project, and I now have the skills to actually carry them out, but on the other hand, the time involved has also increased exponentially.
Tbh with you, as an animation student, it's been one of my dreams since 2020 to do one of TMS's sequences in animatic or full anim, or even a trailer for the comic! But as a solo team, it's just unreasonable and I know it. But the parasite ----. Don't get me wrong, I could, but it would take me months and it's just not realistic when 80% of my time has to go into professionnal work that goes into my portefolio or adult stuff. I can't affort to invest time in solo-ing it or to recruit and lead a team over one side project of mine ( ´ ▿ ` ) So we'll most likely stick to classic pages.
But the same goes for collabs, community events, side stories, asks, edits, dubs, testing other platforms, regular animatics. Love all of that. Really. But I never have the time to because, man, I'd love to actually finish TMS someday ahah. It all comes back to the age-old problem of “lots of ideas, little time”, and it's so frustrating but, it's a choice I have to stick to, so bear with me as I vent my frustration. Just for tonight (´ ∀ `, *)
So, yes. Act 2. Next year? Probably? It's a long interlude, so you'll get smth in the meantime, but it's likely to decide the future of TMS and whether Act 2 sees the light of day as I imagine it or if...well, something else replaces it.
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bringing back this doodle cuz it seems fiting lol
Anyway, I also wanted to thank you for your engagement with Part 8!
I don't know how other comic artists experience it, but for me it's a very isolated work, and as much as I love working alone, I enjoy the interaction with readers most of all.
Seeing people losing their mind over a serious scene, or chuckling at a dumb gag, or just simping over the characters and art. It's just great, and very rewarding. Likewise, I have a blast answering questions about the TMS universe, reading tags and receiving memes, witnessing people go increasingly mad with messages full of indecipherable screams and hearts. Makes me giggle and kick my feet everytime and I can't wait to drop the next lore bomb or funny scene bwahahah
And while we're on the subject, I'd like to say a special word of thanks to the legions of rebloggers who make it their business to spread the word about TMS. You sweet, lovely, candy scented folks. And to my dear mutuals - with whom I interact objectively so little - who have no idea how a single message or note from them drives me bonkers. Thanks for dropping by. And of course to my super Patreons who support me despite the sparse updates, but to whom I'm more than grateful. Love you all.
Sounds like a farewell message. It's not lol. Just making sure they get the love they deserve.
The post is getting long and I'm kind of done pretending I know how to write organized notes so to wrap things up, here's an exhaustive list of what I'd like to get done this year and/or discuss in more detail another day. •Make a new masterpost (for Act 2) •Analyze/Comment certain sequences from Act 1 to clarify or give context •Redraw and rewrite part 1 and 2 •Make more bonus content again *ahahahahahaha*
•Re open or close the Discord (partially abandoned and it's all on me, but I'm still mulling it over).
•Finish the Interlude and enjoy and nice hiatus
And that's about it? Congratulation for reading this and making it this far! You were there!
Be well, and see you next time.
Seirin-
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Hi! Big fan :) You're an environmental lecturer, right? I recently got into a debate with someone about rewilding in the UK, and the clash with farmers and agriculture. To me, this is a no-brainer - I absolutely do feel for farmers losing their livelihoods, and I think there needs to be a system to help them transition to something else, but also, the planet is dying. But you explain things well, so I wondered if you have thoughts? Particularly on the Welsh side of things. Thank you in advance!
Hah. I literally have a lecture on this. Or, well, a chunk of a lecture, anyway; so yes! I have thoughts. I'll use those notes, and stick a big reference at the end in case you want to read more
I'll talk about this specifically from the Welsh perspective, okay so:
The rewilding project in Wales is the Cambrian Wildwood, launched in 2004ish by a guy who bought an abandoned farm in the northern end of Mid Wales with the express intention of rewilding it. The aim is to convert some 7000 acres, and the initial mission statement said they'd reintroduce wolves and lynx. That's the project I'm going to talk about, because it's a great case study for how to spectacularly fuck something up (and eventually realise you've spectacularly fucked up, and do something about it.)
These are the Cambrian Mountains:
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When looking at that, there are two competing viewpoints that are relevant here:
The Cambrians are ecologically depleted. Their biodiversity has crashed since the Second World War, when modern farming methods were introduced. Environmentally, there is a perception of emptiness and degradation.
The landscape is a glorious one that has been shaped by the human actions taken on it for generations, as we are a shepherding culture – culture and land are inextricably intertwined.
That's a big fundamental difference! Two people can look at that same photo, and see something diametrically opposed. But there's more lying on it, so you also need to understand the socio-political background.
Socio-Political Background
(I know! Headings! So professional)
A lot of rewilding – Cambrian Wildwood included – is taking place in areas where farming is declining for various political/socio-economic reasons, so this can be ENTIRELY FAIRLY seen as yet another threat. This goes hand in hand with rural migration and community decline, too.
In Wales, we’re mostly rural, and characterised by extensive upland livestock farming (sheep in particular). Most farms are small to medium family-run setups. ON TOP OF THAT, the vast majority of Welsh farmers are Welsh-speaking, and the right to operate a farm the ‘traditional’ way without UK government oversight is seen by Welsh Nationalists as an important post-colonial act.
Many of them didn’t even like the National Parks being set up, as they were seen as an English outsider imposition that ignored the working nature and cultural history of the land. Remember: the farmed uplands are often seen as a heartland of Welsh identity, and those have historically been intentionally destroyed by UK central government land management decisions (e.g. Tryweryn, Elan, Claerwen, etc)
“Over the past half century we have witnessed the arrival of countless environmental fundamentalists… seemingly oblivious to the fact that their new-found paradise is already occupied by people whose connection with the land is deep rooted, dates back thousands of years, and is embedded in their language and culture.” (Nick Fenwick [Farmers’ Union of Wales] 2013)
SO IT’S CULTURALLY DICEY
(And in my opinion an incredibly stupid idea to go and give it a primarily English name with a Welsh translation as an afterthought but that is Elanor’s Opinion and not Scientific Fact)
(But fr fr if you ever have to get involved in these sorts of projects you will go a long way if you have the basic respect of learning the Welsh names and pronouncing them right rather than lazily expecting everything to be in English sorry sorry I digress)
From the Cambrian Wildwood’s Mission Statement on their website, their objective is:
“To rewild or restore land to a wilder state to create a functioning ecosystem where natural processes dominate by carrying out habitat restoration, removing domestic livestock, and introducing missing native species as far as feasible.”
Can you see the controversial bit of the statement
Can you see the bit where they directly say they want to remove domestic livestock
Jesus Christ
Cultural Differences
AND THEN HERE'S THE BIGGER PROBLEM
‘Culture’ in Welsh is diwylliant – literally, a ‘lack of wildness’. There is no direct translation into Welsh for the term ‘rewilding’ – the closest you can get is anialwch or diffeithwch, which mean ‘wilderness’ in the sense of ‘desert’ or ‘wasteland’. So right off the bat, if you tell a Welsh-speaking farmer that you want to rewild the place, what they hear is "We want to make it dangerous and empty and degraded."
A related concept is cynefin - knowing one’s ‘patch’ and the feeling of belonging associated. The term has its roots as a description of the way grazing animals know their area of mountain land, but it is also used to describe how people come to form an intimate experiential knowledge of place - and specifically, a Welsh farmer's cultural attitude.
Basically, Welsh literature and oral traditions speak of a relationship with the land, not a separation and longing for an untouched wilderness. Farmers feel this especially keenly. Culturally, this is a big part of why they do it – they’re rooted to the land, and therefore to their identities.
“Interviewees conveyed this by referring to areas proposed for rewilding as being comprised of “a quilt of cynefinoedd: interwoven stories, the layered and collective place-making of families and individuals over-generations, co-constituted with the physical landscape” (Wynne-Jones, Holmes and Strouts, 2018)
So, to them, rewilding is erasing and disregarding these stories. To them, this is not just a land-use change, but the latest colonial attack. They've known the family who lived on that farm for generations - every birth, marriage, death, joy, triumph, loss, everything. You are saying that you are going to strip that family, all those stories, all those people out of that land, to be forgotten.
However. There is a counterpoint to this.
Many farmers taking this view have therefore identified themselves as the only “truly Welsh” people in the debate, accusing environmentalists as being outsiders. The problem with this being, most of the environmentalists involved with the project are also Welsh; so who the fuck are they to say who is or is not Truly Welsh? It's what we on the internet would recognise as gatekeeping, with a big side order of No True Scotsman fallacy.
Also this quote sums it up well:
“Sheep farming in this country goes back a few hundred years. I think if you go deep enough into our culture and ancestry, we have a really deep native relationship with wild forest areas and with the wild animals that are native to this country…I just don’t agree that sheep farming is really part of our traditional culture.” (WWLF Interview [15] 2016) (Wynne-Jones, Holmes and Strouts, 2018)
This is also a fair point. It is true that upland sheep farming, the way we now practice it, is only a few hundred years old, and at the current intensity only a few decades (since WW2).
On top of which, there has been plenty of exploration over the years of farmers as being a government-subsidised landed gentry, which I won't go into here, but it also contains some fair points.
In truth, all of it and none of it is true. It’s far more complex and nuanced than either side might want to believe.
Solutions So Far
This is an ongoing project and they're still learning and changing new things and stuff, but a big thing they did was get someone in to basically be a mediator and listen to both sides, because Jesus, those sides were not listening to each other.
But to date:
They actually worked with a first-language Welsh speaker (WHY DID THEY NOT DO THIS FIRST I'm sorry I'm fine). Originally the Welsh translation of the project was Tir Gwyllt – wild land. But given that Welsh connotations with gwyllt are something out of control or dangerous, Coetir Anian has been chosen – anian refers to a sense of natural order and creation, a sense of health and vitality. Similarly, ‘rewilding’ is being translated as ‘di-ddofi’ – ‘de-taming’. This acknowledges the labour and culture taken to tame it, and just suggests an avenue for discussing some relaxation of farming practice in appropriate locations rather than, you know, releasing packs of wolves directly into sheep pens
In online materials and in community engagement events where traditional storytellers and musicians have performed to celebrate the Wildwood, the trustees have drawn heavily from Welsh myth in the form of the Mabinogion. Enormous amounts of the Mab lovingly and respectfully feature wild woods and wild animals. The emphasis is therefore on how wilderness is also part of Welsh identity – and arguably a much older part, going back to the Celts. (This is clever, in my view, but something to approach with care - it's rarely a good idea to play the game of "What's the most Welsh". But so far it's been done sensitively)
Land purchased for the project has so far been wholly limited to that available in the public domain. The main site, Bwlch Corog, was empty and unfarmed for six years before purchase, which has been stressed in all media interviews and releases; this is important, because farmers do have a sense of "Productive land is being stolen by environmentalists".
Large predator reintroductions have largely been abandoned. Lynx and wolves are no longer on the agenda. It’s possible they’ll be included in the future, but it is acknowledged as currently impractical (both from clashes with farmers and lack of habitat).
Instead, they’ve supported smaller species reintroductions, such as the Vincent Wildlife Trust’s pine marten translocations, and some proposed red squirrel ones.
Bwlch Corog is to be managed as an experimental plot that farmers are encouraged to engage with.
Assessing the potential for new income streams (from improved tourism and educational activities) rather than just the ecological benefits – this has become central to the project, and the emphasis is on how this might benefit farming communities and keep them together. This has been huge, and has also been successful in rewilding schemes in Europe.
Tensions are a lot lower now than they were ten years ago, but ultimately the problem was a bunch of outsiders came in and decided they knew best without listening to anyone else's point of view, and that meant both sides really dug their heels in. Much better now.
Ultimately... yes, I am in favour of rewilding, in a general sense. But I think it needs to go hand in hand with supplying farmers with the necessary subsidies to transition back to more traditional and sustainable farming methods, and the two elements run side by side. You can't do one without the other, not if you want them to succeed. The Pontbren Project is a great case study for how a farmer-led scheme can successfully aid them economically while also improving environmental outcomes, and we need to learn and incorporate more lessons from it when discussing this kind of landscape-level management.
Also, with land management in general, I think you're a fucking idiot and dangerously arrogant if you think you can get anything done without all stakeholders being on board. And potentially wandering down the ecofascism path, circumstances dependent.
Anyway, those are my thoughts. Source:
Wynne-Jones, S, Holmes, G & Strouts, G (2018), 'Abandoning or Reimagining a Cultural Heartland? Understanding and Responding to Rewilding Conflicts in Wales - the case of the Cambrian Wildwood.' Environmental Values, vol. 27, no. 4.
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a-confused-spoon · 12 days
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Jinx's haircut: how Powder and Ekko's story comes full circle
Hi! So, it appears Jinx will be cutting her hair short in season 2 (which is cool as fuck), and I’ve been seeing a lot of discussion on it, so I wanted to share my two cents 😊
I might refer to Jinx and Powder as if they are different ideantities, but I'm aware that's not how that works; it's just an easier way to express myself. Also english isn't my first language, so apologies for any possible wiritng mistake (this is a bit of a mess 😅)
* deep breath in *
As it has already been pointed out, this choice must have a deeper reason other than esthetic (I've been seeing the phrase "hair holds memories" used a lot), and what's even more interesting is that her new look resembles a lot how she used to look like as a kid; a bit bizarre, given how the entirety of season 1 showed us how Powder and Jinx's coexistence only brings the girl pain. As a matter of fact, the finale makes it clear to us that even she sees these two sides of herself as mutually exclusive.
So why and how exactly would this happen now?
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What I keep going back to is the idea that maybe, just maybe, this has to do with her possibly "taking the lead" in Zaun; whether she actively becomes a leader or if she just "leads by example" (therefore passively), it doesn't change the fact that for better or worse she will be depicted as a leading revolutionary figure.
And fair enough: she singlehandedly killed half of the Council, the people who hold decisional power and have contributed to the misery on the other side of the river. After Vender's failed attempt on the bridge and Silco's focus on his own business dealings with Piltover among everything else he did, Jinx's attack on the city - something she does to ultimately solidify her identity as Jinx - opens a door that the Undercity was waiting to be opened for decades.
Here's the thing:
Being Jinx doesn't just mean acting on unbridled rage and being a menace to society; it means being feared by most, if not all, with the only possible exceptions being those who also accepted their inner monster. To put it in Singed's words, "If you take this path, they will despise you".
Being Jinx fundamentally implies loneliness.
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Silco was consistently reminding her this: "I am your family; everyone else betrays us" / "Everyone betrays us Jinx! Vander! Her! They will never understand, it's only us".
In the official clip 'Enemy of my enemy' we find out that he only saw her cry twice, the two scenes we also witness as an audience, meaning he didn't see her cry once during the timeskip, and I'm sure it's safe to say that she most definitely did cry a lot given how she goes from episode 3 Powder (scared, couldn't grasp the concept of killing someone, heartbroken by the nickname jinx) to episode 4 Powder (a beast, kills in cold blood, has taken Jinx as her actual name)... it must've been an ugly transition, and it definitely didn't happen overnight; if Silco, who was the closest person she had all that time, didn't see it, then I think it speaks a lot on how alone Jinx really was in her darkest times.
For all the love he had for her, he reinforced this idea of isolation as an unescapable consequence of the right path, and I think this is also reflected in the lair that (supposedly) he found for her, especially when you compare it to the Firelights’ one:
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The Firelights (this is important for later) are all about community and sharing joy as well as struggle and pain; they live in a place of healing, filled with life, without a roof so the sunlight can reach them during the day, and at nights living bugs that shine a light of their own fill up the hideout.
Jinx's place is diametrically opposed to this: it’s dark and looks cold, it's completely made of metal, the roof’s blocking any natural light and it hangs above an abyss with no bottom to be seen; the only company she consistently has are the puppets of her dead brothers and the only living thing that knows his way in is the only one that can understand, the only one she can rely on - aka Silco himself.
However, as Jinx herself knows, this may have worked for him, but it wasn't working for her for the longest time: she never stopped yearning for affection, love, friendship- that part of her never really went away; it was only being suppressed, suffocated, maybe unintentionally, and I strongly believe that it only worsen her trauma, and it's one of the things that made her spiral so bad into her depression, to the point of hallucinating.
I think that Silco's line in the baptism scene is particularly relevant here: "You need to let Powder die, so the fear of pain will no longer control you", where the fear of pain would refer to the fear of being on her own, of always failing and disappointing others, of being weak and never satisfying the desires, expectations, hopes that Powder carried within her to be “a valuable member of the team”.
If she lets Powder die (which again, she does in the final episode of season 1), this is no longer a problem: if she doesn't do teams, because teams don't want a jinx to begin with, that fear can't get to her; if she's a solo player, a self-sufficient loose cannon, she won't need to rely on anyone but herself because she's strong on her own and does not need the support of others.
If her power lays in the monster she is, the one everyone condemns her for being, then that childhood wish of hers just isn't a realistic option.
...but then this happens.
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We know from the teaser trailer that in the operation Caitlyn's leading, 'finding Jinx' and 'neutralize any agent still loyal to Silco' are separate objectives. Which makes sense, since as far as they know Silco was the leader of a group of people, and now that he's gone Jinx is an individual under her own agency and her own agency alone. If initially she fights by herself, for herself because she can and fuck Piltover, then it all falls in line with what I stated so far.
But then we hear Sevika, who has hated Jinx's guts and who Jinx has hated back since day one, telling her to get the people together, to unite the Undercity as one because she can do that. Mind you, the girl has lived in Zaun all her life, she knows damn well that the end of Piltover is something the entire Undercity has been waiting for (“Imagine what the whole of the Lances could do!” from episode 2); yet despite this she needs to be openly told what is going on, that she’s not sizing the opportunity she’s created. She isn't, cause... her? Leading? A group of people? No. Not after the last time she tried to help, and most importantly, not after everything she learned under Silco.
Jinx can't fathom the idea of herself as a part of a part of a team. How can she? She literally just came to terms with isolation as ever present- and now, for some reason, the people of the city, who always either ran away from her or wanted her gone, are dying their hair blue in her image, trusting her, following her, painting murals of her as the bringer of revolution.
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She isn't taking power forcibly like Silco did; she's just doing her thing, her Jinx thing, and Zaun, on its own, is choosing her as the leading figure.
Imagine how frustrating it must be for Jinx to look back and realize that Silco, her father- who has loved her, forgiven her, raised her, called her perfect, defended her, was there for her, saved her, guided her- was wrong, and put her in a condition of never ending existential pain when she could’ve had it differently the entire time; imagine how confusing it must be for her to look back and realize that it never mattered whether or not others understood her, 'cause she wasn't as unlovable or unforgivable as she thought herself to be in the first place, that Silco and Vi were never her only options.
Imagine how painful it must be for her to look back and realize that for all this time she could’ve had friends and be accepted and be trusted and rely on others because she never HAD to be alone.
...keeping this in mind, let's talk about Ekko and the missing flashback from episode 7 for a moment.
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Admittedly we don’t have a lot of information, other than it took place not too long after the events of episode 3 (then again, to be fair, we don’t know a lot about their relationship as enemies as well: it’s all between the lines; I surely have my own opinions of how they feel about each other being on the enemy side, but I don’t believe it’s super relevant here). What’s for sure about this flashback is that it was a defining moment in both Ekko and Powder’s journey, especially for the latter. Someone surely died, and it 100% was Powder’s fault. It could be both the result of her very first crisis or her first intentional murder; in both cases it results in her deciding for herself to align with Silco as opposed to her best friend.
The way I like to see it is that, since the trauma was still very fresh, she might have been too scared of the idea of fighting alongside others after what happened last time, and she pushed herself to kill someone on purpose just to push Ekko away and prove a point (Silco’s point). I love the idea of the tragic irony of Ekko being the one person Powder managed to really save, and Powder being the one person Ekko couldn’t.
Personal headcanons aside though, the last part is the most important one here: Ekko couldn’t save Powder from Silco, and by extension everything he represents.
I’d like to point out that one of the most tragic aspects of the two becoming enemies (to me) is that, throughout those years, they reciprocally were the only living person the other shared a past with (well, Vi too, but she was in prison the entire time).
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Silco not only takes over by force, he also marks as his all the places of said past: the Last Drop, Vi and Powder’s house… one line that always stuck with me from episode 7 is when Ekko tells Vi “All that’s left is Jinx, and she belongs to Silco”.
Not with Silco; to Silco. As if she too a piece of the past he turned into his property.
It’s like he understands that while yes, Powder made the decision by herself, that she wants to stay with Silco, he also knows that the man is the one to blame for... well, all of it; the kid was there when Silco showed up unprovoked at Benzo’s place, he knows things went downhill from there.
Ekko knows that he is the bigger problem and the bigger enemy. Even Vi, without knowing a thing about the past few years, can tell Silco put some shit into her sister’s head; Ekko can probably guess the same, difference being that Ekko has the responsibility of keeping other people safe, and he can’t risk it all for someone that, while possibly manipulated, ultimately isn’t collaborative. Ekko can’t jeopardize all he’s built and done for his former best friend, no matter how much it hurts him to be her enemy.
Back to season 2.
Like the entire fandom has already pointed out, there’s a 99.9% chance there will be an alliance between them and Jinx, especially when looking at Ekko’s new outfit.
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Of course, this will not be immediate: my guess is that while Jinx works alone at the very start Ekko will be with Heimerdinger and following the arrest of the Firelights we see in the trailer maybe there’s a split. And even after Jinx takes charge so to speak, and possibly frees them, among others, from Stillwater, it’s possible there will be (and there should be) stages in the alliance: initial distrust, potential fight within the community- like yeah, let’s not forget what Jinx did to these people.
Even if they do go ahead with it, it is probably out of necessity more than anything else, with not one but two military forces against the whole of the Underground. It’s not like they’d be the most ecstatic faction about it, and the same goes for Ekko, which is why the new look will probably come in later.
But exactly like he could see Powder for a brief second on the bridge clearly enough for him to stop himself from beating her, he will, most definitely, see her again through Jinx's inner turmoil... that, and she also can’t keep her shit together when it comes to what she's feeling, the girl really is an open book.
And yeah, the situation would be pretty emotionally disorienting: she's being as Jinx as ever, but people like her now, which is something she used to want as Powder, who is supposed to be dead, and they're willingly following her like they willingly followed Vander and there's murals of her with him, though she's pursuing what aligns more with Silco's dream, but also turns out Silco was wrong about Powder, who might still be alive deep down- the whole thing is a big big mess.
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Despite everything that I said about him, it’s not like Jinx would start to resent Silco. She could never, not after his last words to her. They mean the world to her, he means too much to her, and let’s not forget she probably hear his voice now too, along Mylo’s and Claggor’s; it might even be a calming voice to her, one she’s happy to hear even if she knows he’s not real… which makes it all worse and more painful to deal with.
In this scene from the trailer, it seems like Ekko’s talking to her (some have pointed out the blue hair out of focus). Since this is still the look in season, at this point in time Ekko (and the rest of the Firelights) are not truly committed to this alliance with Jinx, and vice versa, Jinx is still figuring out how to deal with all this unexpected appreciation.
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If there’s one thing we’ve learned about Jinx’s way of dealing with inner conflicts, especially ones that deal with the memories of the past, is that it often leads to disaster. This is a bit of a long shot, but what if the reason Ekko’s so beat up Is because she unintentionally sabotaged one of their own attacks on Piltover? Or perhaps they were caught up in a tough situation because of something she did or didn’t do? My point is that if he really is talking with her while in this condition, she probably is in a similar one.
Regardless, they are on the same side, and they are having a conversation. This is very likely the first time they reach out for each other since the day she chose to not go with him.
And I think it’s believable that of all the people she now has beside her, she’d talk to Ekko: he has this leader stuff already figured out. He has and still is taking care of people and keeping them safe better than she ever will, and on top of that, he still is the only one in Zaun (again, aside from Vi) who has known her since before she was Jinx, and he spared her on the bridge. He’s the perfect person to open up to.
And, get this, not only Ekko understands the pressure of taking the lead: he knows what it means to look back at someone you were fond of and feeling the pain of being wronged by them. He knows what it’s like to look back at old memories of someone you trusted and wonder if all those moments together really were what you thought they were, he knows what it’s like to wish it could all go back like it was, just so that candid version of them you have in your mind can still be true, present and untainted by the ugliness that now ruins all those precious moments.
He knows, 'cause he went through it with her... and now he can finally reach her.
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Ekko may have not been able to save her from Silco then, but he can save her from Silco now.
And since he has built a community that grieved together, went through pain and joy together, he simply does what he’s always done with the Firelights. Sharing.
He tells with her what has worked for him: “Sometimes, taking a leap forward means leaving a few things behind”- in the Franch dub he says “leaving a part of oneself behind”- meaning it doesn’t have to be all or nothing: she has the power to choose what to kiss goodbye and what can stay…
…and then she cuts her hair.
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I think it’s important to note how these two moments are very similar in setting. I kid you not, the first time I watched the trailer I was convinced this was a scene where Jinx was burning Silco’s body after she killed him- which frankly could still be the case. I’ve also seen discussions being made for the little girl we see in the trailer being burned here, or Sevika, but I don’t think it’s either. Jinx is completely desensitized to death, even when Silco died her makeup isn’t this ruined. My guess is that this is something much deeper:
Jinx never properly grieved the past. Ever. So, maybe, she’s burning the part of herself she’s leaving behind. The hair she cut.
The hair Silco used to braid for her.
These two scenes parallel each other because “nothing ever stays dead”, but Silco must stay dead, for her own sake. For her own happiness: she is leaving him behind for good.
Only after this moment we get the new look for Ekko: he can work with this new Jinx, the one that now knows she can work within a team, even to the point of committing to the outfit (lol).
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If in season 1 Jinx accepted her identity as it was defined by Silco, in season 2 she's re-inventing it under her own conditions: she gets to choose what "being Jinx" may or may not include. And it will always include a little bit of Powder.
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Thanks for reading! 💚💙
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angyo · 4 months
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HOT DAMN ik i already said a bit abt csm 167 but i keep thinking of more extremely interesting shit here and the sheer inner turmoil in the shared body of asa and yoru
I was wrong, it's not yoru masterminding this. Maybe she is, but we've already got so many hints that yoru and asa are starting to rub off on each other, w/ yoru feeling asa's emotions and asa getting more nonchalant about death and killing. Everything until now has been a relatively clean merge, something neither of them even notices too much.
But denji is a jagged edge. Asa and yoru have very different approaches to love and interpersonal relationships. Asa being a sex repulsed and desperately lonely romantic and yoru being the embodiment of war, uninterested in love, & intimacy only being violence (because war).
The merging can't go unnoticed anymore, it's not just massaging red play doh into blue play doh anymore. Their feelings regarding denji and chainsaw man are so different and entirely irreconcilable the merge is hacking off a hand and painstakingly sewing each individual nerve and vein to the end of a fraying rope.
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Here yoru is her usual uncaring self. Denji wants to lose his cock, so be it. Who cares, she's war, she's done worse and feelings never got in her way before.
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When denji knocks the knife away that's a very asa face and reaction despite the scars showing it's clearly yoru. Yoru isn't this clumsy. It's not like denji peeled her hand open, he knocked it away and yoru wouldn't have such a loose grip on a weapon.
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Yoru is shocked. This shouldn't feel too different from any other fight for her, why is she so shocked? I thought she was unaffected by emotion, so why would she feel even a second of confusion about hurting denji? It's like she's shocked at herself, and she reasserts herself by doubling down on the violence and gripping his balls. Doubt isn't like her, it must be a fluke. She'll finish it quick.
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Once again, that is an Asa face with the yoru scar, immediately followed by yoru attempting to regain herself
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And failing. This is yoru, why is she so confused? If she wanted to assault denji it wouldn't be unwarranted from War, but there's emotion in that kiss. She looks so shocked when she pulls back, this isn't yoru's idea nor is it asa's. Again it wouldn't be surprising if war decided to idk assert dominance by assaulting denji, but if that was her goal she'd be as confident and unphased as she usually is in fights. At worst she'd be angry if he didn't go along with it, but panicky? Confused? That's not like her
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She's too emotionally involved to be yoru, but too sexual to be asa. This is the ugly joint of fraying rope and nerve endings. A girl neither asa nor yoru recognize as themselves and one they can't control as individuals. They are merging, but they can't merge into 1 whole person, they're so diametrically opposed in their views of interpersonal relationships that they can't fuse cleanly together and instead their jagged edges get smushed together with such force it makes a 3rd person they mutually hate and are unable to control.
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Finally they split again and asa is so deeply fearful she takes over again. But despite losing the scar she keeps the horseman eyes, and the paneling splits her in half implying we are seeing both of their reactions here. And despite having seemingly been in control and making the decision to assault denji, asa and Yoru are equally terrified by what just happened.
This wasn't yoru raping denji then leaving asa to handle it. God that'd almost be better since at least then asa could blame her, but she can't. This was the ugly frankenstein joinery of yoru and asa acting here. Both individuals lost control of their shared body entirely while their desires were mangled and reshaped into something they find mutually disgusting but are forced to feel as enjoyment. Yoru experiences sensation and emotion she considers so far below her and is terrified by this loss of her devil nature. And asa is lost in indulgence of violent sexuality the likes of which she never could've previously imagined enjoying, let alone forcing onto the only person who ever gave a shit.
As a person she is so deeply concerned with morality and righteousness she won't even cross a red crosswalk with no cars around at night, but she's been forced to commit a crime so heinous as rape against the boy she likes and gain enjoyment from it.
It's so deeply violating not just of her agency but her existence as an individual it's hard to define in words, but i can only imagine asa scrambling away. Frantically she screams at yoru for fucking it all up so badly, only for yoru to be equally as scared and disgusted. This wasn't yoru's doing. This devil that has had such tight control of her for so long is completely clueless as to what the fuck even happened or why and points at asa because if it's not yoru it's asa yeah? But if they look deep inside themselves, they'll see that their reflection isn't them. Neither of them know who this is, and they can't talk to her or control her even as they get sucked into this singularity.
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thelesbododo · 5 months
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This is a headcanon circulating around a sensitive topic and one that you may not agree with so if you don't want to read it please scroll.
This headcanon revolves around the character Osamu Dazai and the concept of sexual assault
I believe that Dazai was sexually assaulted as a child
This has nothing to do with Mori and takes place long before they even meet
While it is true we know little to nothing of BSD Dazai's past, it is also true that it is highly likely the Irl author and his No Longer Human counterpart was SA'd
There are two specific pieces of writing are evidence of this
"My true nature, however, was one diametrically opposed to the role of the mischievous imp. Already by that time I had been taught a lamentable thing by the maids and manservants; I was being corrupted. I now think that to perpetrate such a thing on a small child is the ugliest, vilest, cruelest crime a human being can commit. But I endured it. I even felt as if it enabled me to see one more particular aspect of human beings. I smiled in my weakness. If I had formed the habit of telling the truth I might perhaps have been able to confide unabashedly to my father or mother about the crime, but I could not fully understand even my own parents. To appeal for help to any human being - I could expect nothing from that expedient. Supposing I complained to my father or my mother, or to the police, the government - I wondered if in the end I would not be argued into silence by someone in good graces with the world, by the excuses of which the world approved.It is only too obvious that favoritism inevitably exists: it would have been useless to complain to human beings. So I said nothing of the truth. I felt I had no choice but to endure whatever came my way and go on playing the clown"
- No Longer Human
"I ceased being a child soon after entering grade school. It was then that my younger brother’s nurse taught me something that took my breath away. It was a beautiful summer day, and the grass by the vacant house out back had grown tall and dense. I must have been about seven, and my brother’s nurse could not have been more than thirteen or fourteen. My brother was three years younger than I, and the nurse shooed him off. She said, ‘Go get some leaf grass’ - that’s our word for clover back home. Then she added, ‘And make sure it’s got four leaves too.’ After he left, she put her arms around me and we started rolling around in the tall grass. Thereafter we would play our secret little game in the storehouse or in one of the closets."
- Memories
Both No Longer Human and Memories are semi-autobiographies, meaning they're somewhat based in truth
I can't speak from experience but SA has a big effect on the lives of the survivors
Some of thes effects include;
Sleeping or Eating disorders
Dazai canoniclly has issues sleeping and there are scenes that imply he has issues with and/or doesn't see the point in eating, at one point saying that it is "so much trouble"
Nightmares
There is a specific scene within one kf the light novels where Kunikida asks if Dazai has nightmares.
(Unfortunately I can't find the exact moment so I can't quote it so if anyone can find it please let me know)
Self-hatred
It might not be clearly stated that he hates himself but ay the same time its rather clear that he does
Suicidal thoughts or self-harm
He is a suicidal maniac
Riskier sexual behaviors such as having many partners
He canoniclly has had quite a lot of lovers
Substance abuse
The one scene we see of his apartment we see that there is more alcohol than furniture (it's also a popular hc that Dazai smokes which makes sense considering his past with the pm and that irl author smoked)
Another moment to mention was when he seduced the nurse (which technically counted as SA too but that's not the point of this)
I'm probably gonna end it here because it's late and I'm tired but anyone willing to add or correct anything please go ahead and I hoped you enjoyed my hc
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tobylix-blog · 22 days
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Braid bickering — Legolas x Reader x Gimli
Content & Warnings: fluff
Word count: 0.5k
Summary: Legolas and Gimli get into a heated argument about braids that suit you the most. You have to intevene
A/N: I came to love them as a duo even more than separately
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"Fishtails!" Gimli stomped his foot in exasperation.
"Dragonscales," Legolas retorted equally as stubbornly.
They weren't even providing reasons anymore, just stating their options. The argument had been going on for a good hour, after all. The reason though was simple and in fact rather immature — they couldn't agree which type of braids suited you more.
Gimli was set on fishtails. In his opinion they did a great job of accentuating your features just right.
Legolas opposed him with his own personal favorite, dragonscales. He fancied their weaving ornament and the way you pulled your hair out into a pretty pattern.
When you returned to the camp, they were practically gritting teeth, unable to harm each other but frustrated to the depth of their hearts. Gimli huffed angrily, while Legolas explained the problem to you, not skipping a bit saying something along the lines of "though it saddens me to acknowledge that Dwarven culture does not bear recognition of the undoubted elegance of dragonscale plaits". It took you a few moments after the elf finished speaking to understand the issue in it's fullness.
And you doubled over from laughter. The sound rang loudly across the field and river, travelling for many dozen feet from your camp and clinging to grass. You went on for a good few minutes, tearing up from the suffocating fits of laughter. Catching breath in a brief pause between spasms, you began cracking up again and again. In the end you were barely alive, holding your aching stomach and forcefully inhaling and exhaling on count.
"Fishtails and dragonscales," you began chuckling erratically once more, but quickly bit down on your lip, "are the same. Different names of one braid."
You looked up at the shocked faces of your lovely companions and wheezed, losing balance and continuing your laughing on the ground. As different as they were, in the deepest beliefs they seemed to be on the same page. Even when they didn't expect to.
Their reaction was diametrically different, though. Legolas was wide-eyed and quiet, while Gimli started mumbling something undecypherable under his nose. Seeing that, you calmed down soon enough and gave the dwarf a hug from behind, washing away his grumpiness with the soft touch. You rested your chin on his head as a playful yet affectionate gesture.
"Oh, love, I wasn't laughing at you, but at the whole exchange. Just imagine how it sounded to me," you murmured. "I'm sorry."
"So am I," intervened Legolas. "I should have expected that our cultures attach different names to the same phenomena."
As he moved closer you motioned him to join in the hug. The elf readily stepped in and embraced both of you from the front, effectively sandwiching Gimli in between.
"I'm an adult dwarf! I don't need no consolations!" he protested. But neither of you paid that exclamation any mind.
"There's no reason for such arguments. You could always simply ask me. And I would settle the issue," you spoke, gently brushing your fingertips against dwarf's shoulders. "Besides, I prefer wheat braid anyway," you remarked casually, putting the end to the pointless discussion.
"Turns out we both were wrong, after all," Gimli sighed, pressing his forehead to Legolas' chest. The elf sighed in response. His mind was busy picturing you with the wheat braids and comparing that to his favorite dragonscales, until...
"Wait, sunshine, but are those not the same- Oh, you..!"
You couldn't help the giggles, pushing away from them both and running for dear life.
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do-you-ship-it-polls · 2 months
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Do you ship it?
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reason under the cut!
People say Kavetham is a good ship because they're roommates who bicker all the time and are basically a married couple already, but it goes so much deeper than that.
What if we met in grad school, where we were instantly drawn to one another because of our diametrically-opposed, perfectly-mirrored ideologies? What if we spent our days embroiled in intellectual debates with one another, fascinated by the way each other's minds worked, all while bonding over our similarly fucked-up family situations and the pervasive sense of loneliness we shared? What if you were a relentless altruist, and what if I was the kind of person who valued self-preservation above all; you, an artist and architect, and I, a linguist and historian; and what if we were so sure that our differences were the strength of our relationship that we decided to pursue a joint research project?
What if that all fell apart, because one day I could no longer bear to see you drive yourself into the ground for the sake of other people, and I said things to you that I could never take back, and it made you walk away from our friendship forever? What if, from that day on, we were no longer on speaking terms, and as we grew older and graduated and became successful researchers with jobs in completely different fields, our only form of communication was firing passive-aggressive shots at each other's worldviews through academic journals and tavern message boards?
And then what if, many years later, your self-sacrificial nature finally got the better of you, and you gave up everything to create your magnum opus? And, while everyone around you celebrated your victory, you were secretly at rock bottom, homeless and drinking yourself to death? What if that was when I found my way to you again? What if, in a moment of weakness, you confided in me about everything you had been through since we had parted ways, and I offered my home to you, then? As a temporary place to stay, maybe, while you got yourself back on your feet.
And just like that, what if we started living together, trying to work our way past the festering, unresolved bitterness between us, picking through the suffocating feelings of regret and yearning and the "I-hate-to-admit-it-but-I-still-care-about-you"s and the constant reminders that we once considered each other family in the absence of our biological families? What if we spent every single day since then trying to gather the shards of our old relationship and reassemble it into something on at least vaguely civil terms? What if that's not an easy task; what if, despite caring for each other so deeply, we have forgotten how to hold a conversation that doesn't devolve into an argument?
But what if, over the course of our story, we were each put into situations that make us realize that we are too precious to one another to keep wasting our relationship away on miscommunications? For example, what if you learned that all your mother wanted for you was to have a companion who would support you unconditionally (even when they didn't fully understand you), just as your parents supported each other -- and you realized that I am the one who fills such a role for you? What if, as we continued to face conflicts with stakes both big and small, we slowly got over our communication issues, and grew content with calling our shared house a "home"?
So, what I mean to ask is: what if we were roommates who bickered all the time and were basically a married couple already?
tag: @kanon-kun
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txttletale · 11 months
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Hi! I have a question to ask you, someone who seems well versed in Marxism and its philosophy, over something that personally confuses me: is there a meaningful difference between materialism and objectivity? The way I've seen the former explained usually just makes me go "Oh, so it's really just about being objective", so I don't really understand why we need another term for it.
i actually think that there is -- at least in the marxist sense of materialism -- a huge gap between being 'materialist' and being 'objective'. a big part of the historical materialist rejection of idealism is the rejection of the idea of timeless, objective truth independent of its observer and context: as engels puts it in socialism: utopian & scientific:
As each one’s special kind of absolute truth, reason, and justice is again conditioned by his subjective understanding, his conditions of existence, the measure of his knowledge and his intellectual training, there is no other ending possible in this conflict of absolute truths than that they shall be mutually exclusive of one another.
the marxist perspective is inherently suspicious of objectivity, because the marxist analysis of society is cognizant of class struggle. because the goals of the bourgeoisie and the proletariat (or the king and the peasant, or the slaveholder and the slave) are diametrically opposed, there is very little that can be said to be 'universal', because the system of values that benefits one class is to the detriment of the other. marx summarizes this thusly in the german ideology:
For each new class which puts itself in the place of one ruling before it, is compelled, merely in order to carry through its aim, to represent its interest as the common interest of all the members of society, that is, expressed in ideal form: it has to give its ideas the form of universality, and represent them as the only rational, universally valid ones.
so the basic premise of historical materialism is that ideas (i.e. 'truths') arise from the material conditions in which they are developed. there is no such thing as an objective perspective because every perspective is situated historically in a particular time and place and set of social relations. claims to 'objectivity', then, are at best suspect, staking a claim to universality that erases class divisions and historical context.
marxism is not an 'objective' framework--it is proletarian, built from the standpoint of the working class and imperialised peoples around the world, and built upon and adapted for dozens of different historical circumstances by different leaders and thinkers. materialism is in opposition to the notion of objectivity, then, because materialism recognizes that all ideas (even one's own conception of materialism!) are ideas that stem out of dialectical interplay between not only previous ideas but the material and social conditions of the people who have those ideas. ideas and thoughts cannot be 'objective', under the materialist view, because to separate them from the context in which they arose is to distort and falsify them in the pursuit of universality.
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irafuwas · 10 months
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Sebek and Silver - More alike than meets the eye
I know much has been said already on how Silver and Sebek diametrically oppose each other – from their handedness to their hobbies, and from their personalities to their poses in certain cards – but something I feel we also need to focus on is the one unifying point in their story arcs. Namely, their journeys to discover just who they are.
*This post contains light spoilers for cards and story content that have not been released on the EN server yet*
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Sebek is infamous for his one-track mind. He dedicates himself to his studies, his extracurricular activities, and his training, all for Malleus’s sake – partly to earn commendation from the men he so respects, and partly to bring honor to his liege’s name. His endeavors are admirable, in that he is diligent, persevering, and earnest, yet rarely does he divulge any of his genuine, private ambitions.
Consider, in fact, that the very reason he sought to enroll at NRC was only to serve as Malleus’s guard, rather than for his own academic aspirations.
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Though we’ve yet to learn just why he so fervently worships Malleus, perhaps we can trace this desire for his liege’s recognition back to a broader need to be affirmed of his worth. If you recall his despair at manifesting his magic so late, and how much it bothered him - hurt him, even - when Silver departed for NRC and left him behind, the great extent to which he values magical prowess is clear to see. And if we further consider how he so longs to separate himself from his human heritage – from his magicless heritage, could it be that, even more than the glory of knighthood, he simply yearns to find a part of himself that he – and all those around him – can be proud of, can find worth in?
For what is he without his magic? He, a mere half-blood, born amongst a peoples whose bodies thrum with a power more sacred, more ancient than the air within our lungs and the ground beneath our feet? I feel Sebek is so driven, so severe in his efforts to claim the right to stand by his liege’s side, just so that he one day might finally be able look himself in the mirror and say, “here, here is at least some part of me I don’t have to be ashamed of, that I don’t have to hate.”
And Silver, that sweet boy, how unerring, how remarkable is his selflessness, how his inexhaustible compassion belies the scant 17 years he’s spent awake on this earth! But when one pours out so much of oneself for others as he has done, when all that one does is for the sake of someone else, how often one loses sight of one’s own identity. Indeed, if I were to draw for you a map of the inside of Silver’s heart of hearts, if I were to plot for you his every dream, measure and record every aspect of his being, I scarcely doubt there’d be a single point you couldn’t trace back to his desire to make his father happy.
To that end, consider how we learned in Silver’s latest birthday vignette that Lilia began training him from an incredibly young age – when he had only just become conscious of his surroundings. A child that young cannot make such a monumental decision for himself - the decision must be made for the child. And so, we do not truly know if Silver’s dreams of knighthood are the result of his own personal meditations, or if his father, in his infinite folly, thrust them upon him, burdening the young child with an aspiration that would go on to consume nearly every facet of his life.
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With the both of them being so unsure in their own identities, it's why I find it so poignant - and so apropos – that Sebek is the one to rouse Silver from his moments of self-doubt, time and time again. When Silver questioned his capabilities as a leader, when he wished desperately that he could change, that he could be more like his classmates, and when he, in his darkest hour, doubted even the sanctity of his father’s love for him – each and every time it was Sebek who liberated him from his great desolation.
It has to be Sebek - for who better to accompany Silver on his journey towards self discovery than one who must walk down the same path as he? Who better than his best friend, his brother, his reflection – his veritable light in the darkness of his own heart?
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inchidentally · 4 months
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also like, as I always say I love the carland0 and dand0 content SO much like it got me into f1blr and I rewatch some of those every week to make me smile <3
but whenever Lando was with those guys - or tbh with any driver older than him - there's always this reverting to baby brother thing where he lets the older guy answer everything more seriously or in detail and then Lando just pipes in w something funny or cute or getting flustered and everyone being like oh that's classic Lando etc etc. and it's always great content lbr!
but him and Oscar being on that freakish wavelength together and automatically sharing responsibilities based on individual strength to do w knowledge/skill (and Lando's mood that day) means we actually get to see Lando's competence and knowledge way more than we used to. bc it's always been there as much as the other guys it's just the ~divergence~ brain making certain environments or certain pressures shutting parts of his brain (and literally do I relate to that).
and not to get too deep but it parallels the fact that when Oscar showed up and everyone was saying how he was Lando's rookie and his protégé etc it threw Lando for a while bc openly said he didn't feel comfortable being in that role to someone else/not having someone older and more experienced to lean on. which I think if Oscar had actually needed that himself it would've not worked at all well - fortunately Zak and Andrea both knew enough of Oscar to know that wouldn't be the case.
BUT !! Oscar knowing cough so much about Lando before joining McLaren meant that even though he rly never needed Lando to be in that guidance/leader role for him, he picked up on Lando genuinely wanting to try and like - that's where the wavelength was established. bc Oscar did put himself in the role of following what Lando chooses and learning Lando's preferences and behaviors which in turn ! fulfilled Lando wanting to do the team and himself proud and be there for Oscar as basically the existing face of McLaren and the popular driver who was able to win over fans and media to Oscar who were not only reluctant to like Oscar at the time, they were actively rooting for his downfall and reveling in McLaren's tough start to 2023. because Lando pushed for such solidarity and included Oscar so much in his social media back then, Oscar returned the favor by learning and copying from Lando how to engage w media and fans on the F1 level of scrutiny. and because Oscar went so unusually quiet and observant with Lando compared to Oscar with the guys in F3 and F2, Lando kept complimenting how "calm" Oscar was and how it was rubbing off on him.
like I know there's the rpf of it all but it's why I feel like we all latch on so hard with landoscar as it exists just in reality bc there's been the opposite of bromance and convenience for them that their dynamics w other drivers have had (similar personalities, interests, being invested in PR - or not, in Oscar's case) and they also didn't even have fans rooting for them to be friends or even be great teammates bc of Alpine drama and being bitter about Daniel AND add to the fact that Lando himself was resistant to the idea of being the older guy. yet despite having that uphill battle and their personalities in superficial/social ways being diametrically opposed, they're the teammates that are known for their freakish mind-reading/twinning and they naturally form to the same car requirements and preferences and after just one season together have the narrowest margins between them on track. and Lando was truly one foot out the door at points last season and while most of him being swayed was loyalty to McLaren, I think if Oscar had been just as competitive as he is BUT wasn't as perfectly matched for Lando as he is then... idk drivers have left teams that felt like 'home' for less reason than that !!
idk Lando twice catching himself referring to Oscar as if they've been teammates for years instead of barely even a season and a half and Oscar having this metamorphosis that's been visible on camera based on using Lando as his pole star for coping with the leap from F2 success->languishing at Alpine->F1 in a rollercoaster season for McLaren. to now watching them in all their content easily swapping duties with unspoken agreement and picking up the middle of each other's thoughts seamlessly (and Wired deciding to have both of them do it instead of just one like usual) and Lando looking to Oscar every time he forgets a word bc Oscar will have it for him immediately. they sit back together and enjoy watching every other team and driver go through chaos bc they've both committed to their team already and don't have to worry about all that for a good while.
sure a lot of us would prefer if they had the shared outside hobby to ensure hanging out even when they're one day no longer teammates but askgsajfglafg honestly for me that's a future concern that idc about !! there's something so we didn't just become teammates against the odds we became one of the best teammate pairings against the odds about them that's compelling in a sports/competition sense but also in the way they hold something fairly special between them as drivers - and undeniably at least in part as people - and them not choosing to advertise for fans when they travel together or hang out or have their own little debriefs and decompresses together - like them being so proud of their new privacy door to their drivers rooms and emphasizing how it's their own place to be private private and away from everyone (even Jon and Kim!) but it's so shared between them that Oscar still hears all of Lando's music
it's such a massive, conscious commitment to each other in a career that is basically most of their lives every year and it's just so !!!! all on it's own as it is for me <3<3
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bloodgulchblog · 4 months
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Nobody asked me, right, but I am gonna post about it anyway:
Romance with Chief is interesting to me because for it to happen would require a huge shift in the character's perspective.
It's easy to see why other characters could love him. John-117 is a big wonderful idiot who is constantly giving of himself to protect others. He's deeply unselfish. He's steady and calm and not aggressive or shouty. There is a lot to like about John.
The thing is that John would have to feel the same way about someone, and as he is right now he can't. He has too many problems going on, and most of all he has this foundational belief that his own personal wants mean nothing. I don't think he could genuinely tease out whether he feels something for someone because it's all just moot to him. John is a weapon used to defend humanity, and for him to want anything else for himself would be selfish in a way he is completely uninterested in exploring.
He also has a lot of rational barriers: Bringing someone into his life would be dangerous for them due to who and what he is, and it would be unfair to another person to make promises to them that he knows he cannot keep. We know how serious John is about his word when he gives it! If he did care about someone that much, he would be able to look at it clear-eyed and say "this person is better off with someone else who can be more to them than I can."
Therefore, looking at all of that, a situation where John does manage to feel something and act on it has to be a story where he's confronting all of the things that are fucked up about himself and his life. It would have to be a story about some kind of recovery for him, which is a huge (and interesting!) project. And romance itself isn't even the most critical part of John asserting any kind of desire to steer his own life, far from it, it's just... it's fun to have another character really really care about him when he's so very bad at caring about himself. It's messy and difficult. It would be easier and possibly better for him not to do that but complicated things are fun to play with.
A story where Chief does all of this is diametrically opposed to what the character needs to be to keep carrying FPS campaign stories. It can't be canonical. Given how incredibly poorly the TV show handled the idea of "Master Chief realized he's a person and wants things in life and what if he had a LOVE INTEREST" I absolutely do not trust Halo to do it.
But it's a big idea hole you can swim in if you want to. As a nerd with free time to burn.
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mysdrymmumbles · 1 year
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I like to think the boar scene went something like this:
Astarion: The pig's dead, my friend. Staring at it won't bring it back.
Tav: *leaning in to inspect it, wondering what fresh hell they've stumbled into*
Astarion: And? Is it dead enough for you?
Tav: These marks are strange. Do you recognize them?
Lae'zel: No.
Gale: That's it? No signs of illness or... Anything?
Tav: It's otherwise in perfect health.
Gale: *now also inspecting the boar more closely*
Lae'zel: *if she cared less, she'd be as dead as the boar*
Astarion: *getting nervous as the wizard and cleric murmur amongst themselves* I-- It's been drained of blood from the wounds in its neck. It's been killed by a vampire.
Tav/Gale:
Tav: A vampire.
Astarion: I didn't want to say anything because I didn't want to worry you.
Tav: You're saying a vampire did this.
Astarion: They are ferocious creatures. But don't wo--
Tav: I thought vampires went after people. Is this one defective?
Astarion:
Gale: Maybe it's one of the druids.
Tav: Wouldn't that be...impossible? For a druid to be a vampire? Aren't they diametrically opposed and all that?
Gale: It's no more impossible than what we currently carry in our heads, I'd imagine.
Tav: But wouldn't it be more inclined to not hurt animals if it were a druid?
Astarion: Yes, well. Muse as you like, but I doubt we will ever--
Lae'zel: Perhaps it is weak, and sought easy prey.
Tav: And it went after a wild boar?
Astarion: *growing agitated* What of it?
Tav: Do you know how much of a pain it is to fight a wild boar? Now there's a ferocious beast.
Astarion: *not arguing there, rubbing a bruise on his arm that was not there the day before*
Gale: I'm not so sure the boar's ferocity would matter much. From what I've read, vampires are more ambush predators, avoiding fights when they can and--
Lae'zel: We did not ask, wizard.
Gale: :/
Astarion: Yes, there certainly are more pressing matters to consider.
Tav: You still have to wonder--
Lae'zel: No, I do not. Whatever ended that boar's life is of no consequence to us, unless it crosses our path. Should it, we will cut it down the same as any other obstacle. We must not get distracted from the search for a creche and a cure.
Astarion: Now there is something we can agree on.
5 min later...
Tav: I'm just saying, if that was done by a vampire, then that vampire is just plain stupid.
Gale: I see we are not letting dead boars lie.
Tav: I just...was it challenging itself?
Astarion: What?
Tav: It'd be better off going after a person. I mean, the druids might put up a good fight, but the refugees? The children? Hells, it'd be easier to take me down than a wild boar.
Astarion: Noted.
Tav: What?
Astarion: Hmm?
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