#spider danno

[friendly-neighborhood-imbecille]

I haven’t drawn in months, maybe since April? Or maybe it was May.

Here’s a cursed sketchpage to apologize for my absence.

[probably-dead]

I have spotted yet another parallel

[moondwellerthatdwells]

I know i am a disney blog, but as someone who's been in multiple fandom including outside of disney i just have to okay???

Here is spider danno animated, happy dannypocalypse

[cinnademon]

I've been rooting through my Procreate files and find more Danny doodles! In true Spider-verse fashion, I design a few Dannos in different styles and physical characteristics for different fics and AUs 😆 This is what I interpret how Danny looks in If You Give A Bat A Burger by @noir-renard (go give their pic some love 💕). Also, here's an obligatory beat-up Danny, because I want the best and worst for our boy.

[papiliomame]

Ectoberweek 2023 Day 29: Masquerade

SPOILER FOR A GLITCH IN TIME!

I recently rewatched the endings of the anime "Durarara!!" and I was thinking that so many versions of Danny popped up throughout the years, it is time for a Danno-tower.

I limited myself to 15 versions and a few other AUs sprinkled here and there because 1) this artwork is already long enough and 2) there are so many AUs and different designs I would need much more time to draw them all.

Here is a list of what AUs are shown here in no particular order and if possible where I could manage to pinpoint the origin of the AU:

Human Danny(Canon)

Ghost Danny(Canon)

End of AGIT Dan Phantom ( A Glitch in Time graphic novel)

Ghost King Danny

DCxDP ( I just put Batman in there as a representative for the whole DC cast)

Crypid/Monster Danny

Spider Danno (dannypocalypse)

Full Hazmat Danny (Mask by @in-the-ghost-mode)

Disabled AU ( I think this post by @madametamma made this AU more known in the phandom on tumblr but I personally encountered this AU in Everything was White by @lexosaurus which the release of the first chapter predates the post)

Little Baby Man (@tourettesdog)

Clown Danny (@letswonderspirit)

Coffee Ghost Danny (@typo-art)

Winged Danny(@the-stove-is-on-fire)

Merman Danny (not sure about this one, but my guess it's from the "Mermay" art event which occur on several social media sites?)

Lab rat Danny

Team Halloween (@the-stove-is-on-fire and @healthysharkshealthyocean fic Ghost in the NYC and the comics)

Shared Cujostody AU(@duchi-nesten)

Wes and Kyle Weston(not sure where the origin is but @lexosaurus made a whole dossier about him here, there are also infos how Kyle Weston came to be)

Dani Masters( a variation of this is the Cheese Melt AU by @lilianade-comics)

I hope those are the correct, for everything else I couldn't really find where they originated from.

This idea was original for the "ten years" prompt but after some work I conclude this fits more the "masquerade" prompt, because AUs are kind of a masquerade to the canon.

[underforeversgrace]

purple and red

DannyMay 2023 Day 2 - Backpack

Title: purple and red

Words: 881

Complete

Jack knew that backpack. He knew that bag on sight, he’d seen it for so many years, slung over his son’s shoulders.

“Mom!” A sixth grade Danny whined. “It’s purple! That’s a girl color!”

“Now, Danny,” Maddie sighed. “Colors aren’t gendered. Gender is a social construct, understand?”

Danny grumbled, holding the new purple backpack in his hands, tags still attached. “And Fentons don’t follow what society says just because they say it.” He said, a mantra he’d heard his entire life.

Jack smiled, slapping his son so hard on the back he was flung forward. Mercifully, he was able to catch his small son before his head slammed against the wall. “Oops! Sorry, Danno!” He patted his shoulder with a more appropriate strength. “But that’s exactly right! Just because the majority is louder doesn’t mean they’re right. From gender to ghosts, it takes good people to be brave enough to challenge that.”

“I don’t wanna be brave, I just wanna be normal.” Danny said, though he no longer was acting like the backpack was a spider trying to bite him.

“Being normal is vastly overrated.” Jack said.

“And the bravest ones are those who come when called whether or not they want to, anyway, not the ones who parade in gold.” Maddie said, brushing back his long bangs and pressing her lips to his forehead.

Danny rolled his eyes, though he finally plucked off the tag, pulling it onto his back, where it was almost laughably too large for him. He’d grow into it, Jack knew. “That is the lamest thing you’ve ever said, mom.” Danny said, though his eyes lit up as he laughed.

He stepped closer to it. Even shredded and burnt, it was undeniably his son’s. What was it doing here, behind a dumpster in an alley?

“It just doesn’t make sense to me, Dad!” Danny, now in his final year of middle school, said. He jerked several papers from the backpack, crumpled as they were at the bottom. “I just can’t understand it! Quadratic equations are the single worst thing I’ve ever seen.”

Jack laughed, moving the backpack to the floor so he could take the seat it had been in. “Lemme see, Danno.”

Danny grumbled as he flattened it out, pushing it in front of his father. “It’s all a foreign language to me.”

“Then it’s a good thing I speak this language,” Jack said, ruffling his son’s hair.

Why was it in a pool of red? What was the red seeping out and growing larger from behind the dumpster, where Jack couldn’t see?

Jack studied the backpack on the floor by the door. It looked too full, nearly to bursting. What did Danny have in there? It certainly wasn’t his schoolwork, if his recent report card was any indication.

He’d still been considering looking through the bag when Danny hurried down the stairs from his room.

“There it is!” Danny said with a relieved sigh, lifting the backpack with ease, despite how heavy it seemed to be, if the way the bottom of the bag stretched was any indication.

A smile and a wave to his father and then he was gone, returned to his room.

Forcing his feet forward, he fought down the nausea creeping into his stomach, into his throat. He had to see. He had to know.

“I know the ghosts are a concern, Mr. Fenton.” Lancer said from behind the desk, the backpack resting between them. “But these are still weapons.”

Danny sat beside his father, staring firmly at his hands. “They can’t hurt humans.” He protested.

“Yet you were burned earlier when one of them accidentally got set off.” Lancer responded.

“I’ll make sure it doesn’t happen again, no more weapons.” Jack had said, trying to give his son an encouraging pat on the shoulder as he did.

Danny just pulled away from him.

A teenager sat there, black haired and clutching at the bleeding stump of his arm, severed at the elbow, crying and clutching it against himself as tightly as he could. The weapon Jack had just shot at the infamous ghost boy, that had sliced through him, clattered to the ground.

“Whatever, Dad.” Danny said as he pulled his backpack from the GAV, Jack having given him a ride to school.

“Son…” Jack said, grasping at straws as he tried to recover the conversation. All he’d done was make a joke about how much fun it would be to feed Phantom into the Ecto-Converted that powered the vehicle.

“What if you’re wrong about their ability to feel pain?” Danny had asked after, having been silent for too long, not laughing at the joke.

“Then they’re still just ghosts,” Jack had answered. “Still just imprints of humanity. Their pain isn’t real.”

“But it feels real to them?”

“They’re ghosts, son. No one cares.” Jack had said, pulling up along the curb.

"I thought we were supposed to stand up for people who society didn't care about? Be brave enough to challenge it?

"For people, son. We do that for people."

Danny had slammed the door and walked away before Jack could say anything, leaving the man confused and sad. What had he said wrong?

Danny’s head shot up at the noise, blue eyes filled with pained tears.

“Dad?”

[goneahead]

so **shuffles feet** @cowandcalf and @stephmcx tagged me way back when Tarquinus was still king. In my defense, it was summer and I was summering. (estivation really should be a hobby. just saying)

Five fic recs of my own personal fics (under the cut ‘cuz I got long-winded)

note 1: All of my fic is on Dreamwidth, some of it has been cross-posted to A03.

Click for lists-> Masterpost of A03 fics Masterpost of all my fic

note 2: My dreamwidth account is friend-locked, but you can drop me a DM if you need an invite.

note 3: fic titles are clickable links. The USDA recommends consuming a minimum three fanfics a day in order to stay properly hydrated.

O-Ate-Four

Addams Family and Avengers 530 words

pairing: none, gen

Why I wrote It: Because my muse is a seductive temptress. And also because I’m convinced the Addams family has to exist in the same world where **checks notes** people fight aliens with pointy sticks.

Why you should read it: Natasha, Wednesday, French cemetery. Come on, what else do you need for a perfect Halloween fic?

Talking about pointy sticks, I may have written an entire fic where Hawkeye renovates a cabin. My ability to write truly riveting plots is… questionable😜

Operation: Cupcakes 1,427 words

pairing: Steve McGarrett/Danny Williams but gen

Why I wrote it: Because the only thing better than writing about cupcakes is writing about red velvet cupcakes. No really, thats the plot. Did I mention my riveting plots?😆

Why you should read it: Because there is a serious dearth of McDanno baking fics. And because there are red velvet cupcakes.

Beam Me Up, Danno

Hawaii Five-0 42,995 (including sequel)

Why I wrote it: Either this was a whumptober fic that got out of hand—or my muse tied me up and threatened to put a Ceti eel in my ear if I didn’t write it. Take your pick.

Why you should read it: Because the world needs a Hawaii Five-0 Star Trek AU? Also, there is Cardassian poetry, diplomatic javelining, and aliens that love butter pecan ice cream.

Yes, this is my second ‘Hawaii Five-0 in space’ AU, and I’m totally done writing about aliens. **hides my Hawaii Five-0 MIB wip behind my back**

Care and Feeding of a Super Seal

Hawaii Five-0 59,934 words

pairing: Steve McGarrett/Danny Williams

Why I wrote it: This is my coda for the Hawaii Five 0 finale and all @cowandcalf’s fault. My muse agreed with all her points in this meta she wrote and… stuff happened. Also, I was obsessing thinking in a very normal fashion about how the ohana deserved better, too.

Why you should read it: I did my best to explain the ending, various plot holes the size of an spider crab, and a few other things that have bugged fans over the years. There’s also Steve!whump, some badass!Danny, and a generous sprinkling of ohana. Most importantly, the boys talk about diving, and get their happy ever after.

Beasts and Outlaws note: this fic is only on dreamwidth

Supernatural 145, 622 words

pairing: Dean Winchester/OMC

Why I wrote it: I’ve always wanted a paranormal fic that felt like it was set in the southwest, so I decided to write one cleverly disguised as a Supernatural AU.

Why you should read it: Where else are you going to get a fic with nagueles, rain gods, and the FBI? Also, Old Man Coyote makes a random appearance and Dean’s in love with a were-cougar.

And yes, I wrote a Hawaii Five-0 AU where I turned Chin into a were-leopard but its totally not the same thing😂

tagging: @itwoodbeprefect @simplyn2deep and @herveiwfromthefloor

[thewordjunkyard]

Phantasty Phest Day 1

Note: I thought I would try my hand at this since I’ve been watching a lot of fantasy shows recently. The prompt is Canon Rewrite. It short, but it basically a rewrite of the beginning scene of Mystery Meat before the intro plays, if it was fantasy. 

_

“GHOSTS!” a man in an orange jumpsuit boomed. His natural loud voice was amplified by the echo off the underground lab’s metal walls. He was speaking to a group of three teenagers sitting in fold-out chairs. “These monsters of post-human consciousness and Dark Magic have been the bane of Amity Park existence for over a hundred years! Ever since that vile Necromancer cursed this land!” Proclaimed the man, Jack Fenton, as he shook his fist at the ceiling.

“Umm Dad?” Danny Fenton, a young man with blue eyes and dark hair, spoke.

“Yes Danno?” Jack smiled.

“Are you sure it's “Dark” magic and not just natural ambient magic of the land?”  Sam Mansion spoke up and argued. She narrowed her violet eyes at the elder Fenton in defiance. Danny sunk in his seat.

Jack beamed. “Of course! Amity Park is located in the Kent Bones lands, which has the highest concentration of Dark ambient magic than other regions. And even though we are close to the edge of the region, we have the highest concentration of Dark magic in the region thanks to Pariah Dark, the tyrant Necromancer! Ghosts and the Undead are a leading problem here more than other places.” Jack explained. “So Ghosts are made of Dark Magic! So me and Mads built this!”

Jack pointed behind the group. A giant hexagonal hole marked off by black and yellow tape sat in the far wall. It glowed a soft green that lit up the room. It gave off a warmth that surrounded them and sunk deep into their bones.

“Its the Fenton Portal! We theorize that Magic, all Magic, has a point of origin beyond this plane of existence we know! So we built this portal to gain access to the Dark magical plane to study and remove Amity Park’s Dark Magic!... But so far it just produces Magical energy that we've been converting to power the house. A great source of clean energy! A lot of people have been interested in that but more details need to be studied before we can safely use it for other things.”

Jack turned around to go through a box of inventions. He continued on about theories of magical planes and its balance to the earth in his search for one of his inventions.

“Dude, you sure your parents aren’t Mages?” Tucker, a young man in a red beret, asked as he looked around the room. “They sure know how to incorporate it into technology.”

Danny put his head in his hands. “Yeah… they’re just inventors. Who freaking punched a hole in reality.”

Huffed Sam. “Well at least it’s a clean source of energy.” She leaned over and whispered to Danny. “Your Dad needs to have a lesson about Dark magic and Forbidden magic. Dark magic isn’t evil!”

“I know but me and Ja-“ A cold hiccup interrupted Danny. “Oh no.”

“Dan-MMM!!” Tucker was plucked off the floor by a large ghost octopus. Its green tentacles wrapped around his torso and head; pinning Tucker’s arms to his sides and blocking his nose and mouth.

Sam scrambled out of her chair to her spider shaped backpack and grabbed her Ward Stone, a stone imbued with Light magic to combat the Undead and Ghosts. As she turned back around to save her friend, she saw Tucker shaking like a leaf on the ground. He looked fine

Danny was standing close by with his hands glowing green as the ghost shot back through the ceiling. His hair was white and eyes were blazed the same color as his hands. They faded back to their natural colors as the magic disappeared from his fingertips.

Jack turned around with a silver and green thermos. “-and this is the Fenton Thermos! This bad boy can trap and spook! Just point and click this button, with the cap off of course, and Va-La!” Jack furrowed his brows. “Umm, did I miss something?”

The trio looked at him wide eyed. “…Dad, we need to re-Ward the house.” 

Jack blinked. “…Oh…”

[notmuchtoconceal]

( o ) goodimpressionofmyself

air currents

tracing the topography of his body

so unlike the heat and moisture he had known. a sense of stillness. serenity divorced from violence. motion separate from the matter of his muscle. silence. song. something there, inside, waking in the newly stirring still

i was…

teeth clenching. the air now sharp inside his throat

don’t… don’t…

posture upright, the ridges of his traps remain supported by the constriction of his base layer. the band of his jock holds firm at the foundation of his core

why am i…

through the membrane, he could see the machinery of his hand, pink and splotched with red. a sprawl of wrinkles sat spider vein where the leather had been. honeycombed with gashes from the cleats of rival cities, the rods swelled up through the skin with each clench of his finger

movement

there’s…

movement

the bulge stood out amongst the frost-flesh climbing his arm. the chafe, puckering and raw, crossed the valley of his elbow, eye-vein red in the mire of his armpit. coming worse now, a rupture was building in the recess where his straps had sat. indentations in the dermis cut nearly to the bone

is it… is it…

free…

the vacuum seal had broken. the air was going out. a hiss of oxide and corroded rubber, mingling with vapors of the biosphere. standing strong. the sting of the sea wind. mineral shrapnel tearing at his biceps

will…

my…

will…

and he was aware of pain again

it seemed so natural in the moment. sliding off the pads. slipping out of his jersey. motion tied to idle talk as he blanked out on the sideline and forgot for a moment the weight like the conchiolin of a snail’s shell. forgot the covenant into which he himself had signed. forgot that he was no longer a free man

no longer…

manatee

hue manatee

color of the sea sloth, grey lard of the shallows

the yellow fat speared on strips of pink flesh, swarmed with a flock of gulls, the laughter of children echoing with the roll of the waves

the oil in his pores congealed into mucus. down every downy hair along the girth of his arm, beads of pearl coalesce, drip and flow. the pads are a part of his body now. an outcropping of the structure of the shoulder girdle where hard plastic welts to bone. festooned with a network of polymer capillaries, fine enough to tear in the line of scrimmage, the shine of his game day jersey pinpricks deposits of his fat layer. he can no more remove his gear than he can peel off his own skin, or unclasp his skull from the notch of the atlas vertebrae

heart rate escalation detected

helix OS online 

regenerative function initiated

engaging hostform paralysis 

the cup adhered to his groin. the girdle to his quads. the lace of his uniform pants to the pockets of the girdle. herein lies a viable ecosystem thriving in primate mucin. colonies of microorganisms in the blisters of his thigh promote rapid increases in hypertrophy, vascularity, bone density and strength, centralized around the horselike distension of his massive glutes. if he could still move his arms, still dig his fingers into the lycra tight around his abs, his veins would bulge and his teeth would grit as he pulled the material up inch by inch to expose pink-grey tendrils of the substance welding him to completion

psychograph signal down

re-running start-up protocol

amorphous foam in the perimeter of his skull. the metallic sweetness of stale aspartame

the weight of a shadow. troops marching toward a river of tar in gasoline colored dawn. battered by the summer wind, bloody light rippled silken through the bars. green leaves fell in mortar bursts as spirits swelled with the anthem

i pochi che danno tutto

riceveranno tutto

warhawks streak across the steel sky. the prows of battleships standing obelisks in the end zone. hands heavenward through water welling in his eyes, veins bulge along the knuckle. the horizon. a divided circle. trident above, three harpoons below, bound by the bony faces of the sea snakes. rows of teeth bare in dominance displays. hand flat to the pins of his chest, an amphetamine rush hit him head rolled back with the roar of the crowd. throbbing out the black blood, needles of its maw broke off in the meddle of his heart

did he not aspire to join the league? 

for as long as he could remember, he knew other players in that distant before-period. the pre-brothers he kept back when he was a larva. they roared in the alleyways and whispered in derelict cellars about the highest level of the game known to man. played by not-men. organisms built like tanks. the pure algebraic efficiency of bodies which do not hesitate, which do not feel pain

a retinal scan. fingerprint on file. voice and facial plane recorded. muscular and skeletal systems pixels on a screen. the machinery of the cheek blurred by the bit rot of arterial webbing

the tile stretching out toward the pool. his new brothers sat encased in the amber resin as globules of liquid light washed over their eyes. sticky inside the hot. honey between their fingers, honeycombs against their spines. beckoning deeper. statements of absolute truth. reminders of the promises they made. helmets bolted. shoulders bolted. genital stimulation through the pouches of the jockstraps as the seepage of sweat and writhing cut reservoirs in their prisons by millimeters over the course of the hours it took to break them down

you are a candidate. you know what you must do. the purpose of a candidate is to endure the conversion process. there is no way out. no chance of ever going back. your life no longer belongs to you

an epilepsy of needles hovers nano-meters above the eye. chromatin within the film branching into roots like the veins through tunnels of the iris

this fear is a moment of weakness. the death spasm of the animal mind

we will make you strong. we will make you brave. embrace the liberation of confinement. the honor inherent in total abnegation before the law

you are not the thoughts you think. you are not the clothes you wear. you are not the seed that sired you. you are the void and cloudless sky ready to strike the earth with a bolt of thunder. you are the sea at once still and full of wrath. you are the levees which hold the outside at bay

embrace this transformation which has already begun; become what you know you have always needed to become

the draft seeping in, slack against the skin. the grip of this yellow jadeite in glucose no longer all consuming, and that narrow release, that minuscule taste of freedom, registering so bitterly on sensitized palates

you are strong now. you are brave now. you belong to a tradition stretching back countless generations. a lineage who have cast off the veil which obscures the sight of the grazing herds. you are more than you could have ever been alone

you are a candidate. you applied for candidacy status of your own volition. only a candidate would voluntarily submit to the conversion already in progress. you wouldn’t be here if you wanted to be manatee

breathing in the hothouse air, the bacterial stench of the aquarium, he lay himself down in the muck, and submitted to the terminal stage of his programming. the cold metal around his arm, strands of gastropod DNA shot into his cells. through fractals in which he saw coral, algae and the conch, filaments of a phosphorescent anemone ran through blood in ultraviolet light

he decided, with no threat of external coercion, that he was to live a life where he was to be nothing but football, only football. hallowed of the doubt, fatigue, and distraction which constituted his own individual will, and reconstituted with the serenity of absolute obedience which lies at the threshold of non-existence. for the good of the game. for the good of the nation. for the good of himself. converted, of his own volition, into a member of the warrior class. one of the privileged few. a non-autonomous football playing biodroid

credere, obbedire, combattere

un nuovo brobdingnag per mille anni

the stadium fish eyes. tinnitus hums in the roar of the crowd

there’s something about game day. something about the connections between people. fathers and sons. friends and brothers. the cuddle fish eyes of boys who want to be like him. who will one day make the commitment to be like him. boys who can this day leave the stadium and return to private rooms, full of private thoughts and private loves. the vista of a metal funnel. something creaking in the deadbolts. effigies in a TV antenna. rust to rust, blood to blood. old wounds ache in the soft and wet. pain tied to nothing. nothing tied to something. not the pain of a torn ligament, or the crack of a battered skull. not the strain of a body falling apart and held together with milky secretions. not the fatty cuts inside his skull pan-seared and crusted, but a melancholy void without words

i am

                 i am

                                  i am

i was

and when he felt the hand on his shoulder, he was aware of how the heat of his cheeks, the shame of his nakedness, had protected him from the chill of the wind

you shouldn’t have taken off that helmet, boy. how many times i gotta tell you. that visor’s your face now

you don’t have a name. you don’t have a family. you don’t have any thoughts or personality of your own. you gave that up when you joined the game

you can’t talk wearing your mouth-guard. nobody can see you locked up behind that grill. you’re barely even human-shaped under all that gear. far all practical considerations, you’re canned meat now

i don’t want any salt on my escargot. don’t go tryin to remember who you used to be anymore. you got that, #22?

matter in the muscle of a hand. weight in the tension of an eye

un nuovo brobdingnag

un. nuovo. brodbingnag

a magnetic current holds his body to this man. this was something intrinsic to all true patriots. the field of animal magnetism which held all participants of the game to the coach, to each other, and to the whole of the spectator class

separate, they were weak. droplets of water on hot concrete, always one moment from evaporation. together, they composed an unstoppable force. became a tide whose forward momentum could obliterate the cities of foreign shores

will was what bound him. will was what united him with his brothers. not his will, but the communal will they had been gifted. the greater whole. a united circle. another cog in the machinery of the game. another cog. another cog. another cog. another cog. another cog. another cog. another

#22 complies. it will return to the equipment shed to reconfigure

suit up, boy

[notizieoggi2023]

Fedez, è di Chiara Ferragni la voce nella sua stories? Cosa dice a Leone: il mistero s'infittisce Nostalgia o realtà? Molti fan dei Ferragnez tornano a sentire la voce di Chiara Ferragni nelle Instagram Stories di Fedez… ma si tratta davvero di lei? Il momento è stato estremamente strano ma potrebbe esserci una qualche spiegazione razionale. Anche perché l'imprenditrice digitale stava parlando con il figlio Leone. Insomma, non è poi così difficile che quella voce fosse davvero la sua. Tra un dubbio e l'altro rispetto all'intera situazione, tuttavia, non ci resta che andare a scoprire che cosa è successo. LEGGI ANCHE:-- Fedez, Miss Georgia pubblica la sua stessa foto: il mistero su quel post poi cancellato Chiara Ferragni: si sente la sua voce nelle stories di Fedez Andiamo con ordine e partiamo dal principio. Tutti danno per scontato che tra Fedez e Chiara Ferragni sia finita, ma nelle storie Instagram del rapper sembra che si senta espressamente la voce di lei. Nel dettaglio, sembra che la si senta pronunciare un "Bellissimoooooooo" poco dopo che Fedez dice alla figlia Vittoria "andiamo a vedere Leo…" per trovarlo intento a giocare con dei gadget di Spider-man, probabilmente usciti da qualche uovo di Pasqua… Il mistero a riguardo si infittisce, anche perché le ipotesi a questo punto sono due. La prima è che Chiara Ferragni fosse insieme a Fedez e Vittoria, la seconda - più probabile - è che fosse in videochiamata con i bambini e che abbia pronunciato quel "bellissimo" al vedere Leone che giocava. Possiamo solo dire che ci fa strano tornare a sentire la sua voce in una storia di Fedez… che possa essere un atto di pacificazione? La battuta pungente su Chiara a LOL 4, la reazione di Fedez potrebbe far arrabbiare l'ex moglie Nel frattempo, con l'uscita di LOL 4, Lucia Ocone nei panni di Veronika, ha citato proprio la celebre influencer: "Che rapporto avevo con Fedez? Capirai, con quel paravento ho avuto un flirt estivo. Ma prima eh, quando era libero, prima di sposarsi con la secca". Fedez era in control room e ha reagito alla battuta sorridendo insieme a Frank Matano… come reagirà Chiara Ferragni al vedere la puntata? Non lo sappiamo ma c'è un dettaglio da non trascurare: LOL 4 è stato registrato l'autunno scorso, quando la crisi dei Ferragnez non era ancora cominciata.

[lexosaurus]

Hey! Do you happen to know where that edit of Danny in a extreme squat pose, crawling forward like a cryptid is? I'm thinking about rehashing it in that Shia Labeouf video for dannypocalypse purposes

here you go!

and the still as well. i dont think an HD version exists. i've asked around, but i don't think anyone's made one yet. i would but im bad at art so that would look like shit

[mcdannowave]

Whenever Steve McGarrett meets someone with a military background.

[airalyswirls]

Just a kiss before going on patrol 💕

[diceriadelluntore]

Storia Di Musica #202 - Lou Reed, Transformer, 1972

Mick Rock, uno dei più grandi fotografi del rock (tra l’altro recentemente scomparso), quando sviluppò delle foto che fece ad uno dei suoi miti (già all’epoca), si accorse che spesso erano leggermente fuori fuoco. Il mito le vide e gli piacquero così tanto che decise di usarne una per il suo nuovo disco, quello della rinascita. Lou Reed era a Londra agli inizi degli anni ‘70, dopo la tempestosa uscita dei leggendari Velvet Underground di cui fu leader e cantante, per registrare due dischi con la RCA. Il primo, a nome Lou Reed, registrato nel 1971 ed uscito nel ‘72, nonostante la produzione di Richard Robinson e la partecipazione di star della musica come Steve Howe e Rick Wakeman degli Yes e Caleb Quaye, il fidato chitarrista di Elton John, fu un fiasco, che mostrava la svogliatezza di Reed, che in pratica pescò dei brani scarto del periodo Velvet. Si pensava al tramonto di una leggenda. Ma la RCA continuava a sperare, e decise di produrre un secondo disco londinese di Reed. Unica condizione, che a curarlo sarebbero stati David Bowie e Mick Ronson, reduci dal successo spaziale di Hunky Dory e che nel 1972 lavoravano nientemeno che a Ziggy Stardust. Per Bowie e Ronson è la realizzazione dello stesso sogno di Mick Rock: lavorare per un mito, e mettono in campo tutta la loro genialità e lucidità musicale per creare qualcosa di grandioso. Registrato in due mesi ai Trident Studios di Londra, Transformer esce nel novembre 1972: gli undici brani diventano leggendari, tra i più famosi in assoluto di Reed e alcuni, che scopriremo tra poco, icone della musica rock. Bowie e Ronson chiamano gli Spiders From Mars a suonare, tra cui spiccano i nomi di John Halsey (batteria), Trevor Bolder (che suonò il basso per anni con gli Uriah Heep e che qui suona la tromba) e soprattutto Klaus Voormann, mitico bassista e sessionista dei Beatles (per i quali disegnò la storica copertina di Revolver del 1966) e Herbie Flowers (basso, contrabbasso, tuba), uno dei più grandi musicisti di tutti i tempi, con partecipazioni in oltre 500 dischi e innumerevoli capolavori, che in questo disco avrà un ruolo decisivo. Bowie era il supervisore, Ronson il vero e proprio produttore, curando anche tutti gli assoli di chitarra, la produzione e gli arrangiamenti degli archi per numerosi brani. La chiave del successo fu l'accostare lo sguardo decadente e tagliente di Reed, i racconti della sua vita, con lo scintillante tocco musicale di Bowie e Ronson, in un disco che parla apertamente di travestitismo, prostituzione, hangover, droghe e altre cose sull’orlo del lato selvaggio. Si parte con Vicious, che in una famosa intervista Reed confermò essere ispirata ad un pensiero di Andy Warhol: «Mi disse "Perché non scrivi una canzone intitolata Vicious (=Vizioso)?", e io dissi "Che tipo di vizioso?", "Oh, sai, vizioso come se ti colpissi con un fiore", e l'ho scritto letteralmente», con le schitarrate di Ronson che sferzano come una sciabola di fiori; la vita della Factory è chiaramente l’ispirazione per Andy’s Chest, per arrivare al primo capolavoro: Perfect Day è una dolente ballata dal significato aperto a molte interpretazioni, basata sul rimpianto delle cose come sono e su come avrebbero potuto essere, probabilmente dedicata alla fidanzata di allora, e futura prima moglie Bettye Kronstad, anche se molti vedono nell’osservazione della tranquillità di un parco cittadino una metafora sul dolore di non essere più “una brava persona” per le dipendenze che si soffrono. Rimane uno dei brani simbolo di Reed, tra l’altro reinterpretata da centinaia di artisti nei decenni successivi. Hangin’ Around è uno dei classici ritratti di personaggi di matrice reediana, tra persone che sembrano interessanti ma non lo sono, quelli che fanno finta di nulla, quelli che vivono dissidi potentissimi personali ma non lo danno a vedere. Poi arriva un riff di contrabbasso, che diventerà mitico, che il fido Flowers improvvisò durante la registrazioni, e Reed, quasi narrandole, ci racconta di altri bizzarri personaggi: di Holly che da Miami in Florida ha fatto l’autostop fino a New York, e che per strada si è rasata le sopracciglia, fatto la ceretta alle gambe (si parla di Holly Woodlawn, una delle star della Factory di Warhol, definita da Truman Capote “uno dei volti degli anni ‘60); di Candy che veniva da Long Island ed era fissa al Max’s Kansas City, nei cui bagni offriva prestazioni orali ma non di tipo canoro (Candy Darling, altra star della Factory, a cui Reed già dedicò una fantastica canzone del periodo Velvet Underground, Candy Says); Little Joe invece è un prostituto (Joe Dallesandro, altra star della Factory, protagonista del discusso film Flesh del 1968, e probabilmente il modello che indossava il jeans in un’altra storica copertina del rock, Sticky Fingers dei Rolling Stones, che fu ideata da Warhol); Sugar Plum Fairy, che è uno slang per spacciatore, è riferito ai fornitori di sostanze che in quelle frenetiche settimane di metà anni ‘60 non andavano mai via dalla Factory;  Jackie vuole diventare un’attrice, o meglio, la James Dean donna, e Reed si chiede se davvero abbia voglia di schiantarsi (con riferimenti metaforici anche alla droga, dato che speeding e crash sono allusioni, Jackie è Jackie Curtis, altra attrice di quel fantasioso gruppo). E tutti questi bizzarri personaggi chiedono se si è pronti “a fare una passeggiata sul lato selvaggio”, rendendo Walk On The Wild Side una delle canzoni più famose della storia del rock, anche per l'assolo di tuba dello stesso instancabile Flowers, che leggenda vuole fu pagato due volte per lo stesso brano, una per il contrabasso e una volta per la suonata di tuba. Ma la meraviglia non finisce qui: dalla bellezza di Satellite Of Love, altra meravigliosa e dolente ballata, altro gioiello della costellazione di Reed; I’m So Free, una sorta di manifesto del suo pensiero, con memorabile riff, Make Up che diventerà un’icona della musica glam che con questo disco arriva ad uno dei suoi picchi, la filastrocca di New Telephone Conversation (ispirata anch’essa a Warhol, e alle strampalate telefonate notturne che faceva ai suoi amici), per finire con l’ennesimo gioiello: Goodnight Ladies è una delle numerose citazioni colte che Reed disseminerà nei suoi lavori (laureato cum laude in Inglese alla Syracuse University nel 1964): si rifà infatti al titolo di una delle poesie di The Waste Land di T.S. Eliot (che a sua volta riprendeva un verso dell’Amleto di Shakespeare, in Atto 4, Scena 5, pronunciato da Ofelia) ed è un brano jazz style che sa di crooner e di serata divertente (You said we could be friends, but that's not what's not what I want\And, anyway, my TV-dinner's almost done\It's a lonely Saturday night) e che chiude in maniera ironica e pungente, aria che pervade tutto l’album, uno dei capolavori della musica rock. Fu un successo anche insperato, con Reed impaurito che le evidenti allusioni delle canzoni venissero censurate. Non accadde ai brani, ma al retro della copertina, dove c’erano due immagini di Ernst Thormahlen, famoso designer e disegnatore: in una è una drag queen, nell’altra è con maglietta bianca, cappello da motociclista e jeans attillati a far risaltare un'erezione. L'edizione italiana fu censurata con un fascione dorato con la scritta "Produced by David Bowie and Mick Ronson" che attraversava la copertina coprendo entrambe le foto all'altezza dell'inguine. All’epoca i nostri censori non volevano saperne di camminare sul lato selvaggio.

[centrumlumina]

Welcome to the 2020 AO3 Ship Stats Top 100!

This list shows the 100 pairing tags with the most fanfics posted on Archive Of Our Own as of August 2 2020. There are 68 M/M pairings, 19 F/M, 3 F/F, 7 Gen and 3 Other. (Please note that on AO3, ‘Name & Name’ indicates platonic or familial ‘Gen’ relationships, while ‘Name/Name’ is used for romantic and sexual pairings.)

Of the 200 names on the list, 26 belong to women and 3 to characters of indeterminate gender, compared to 25 and 4 respectively in the 2019 list. There are 52 POC and 7 racially ambiguous characters, compared with 46 and 8 last year.

For more information on this project, please see the FAQ post. You might also want to check out the Top 100 pairings of 2020 or the Top 100 Femslash Pairings. This stats series is also available on AO3.

A text-only version of the list is below the cut.

Rank   Change   Pairing   Fandom   Works   Type   Race 1   0   Castiel/Dean Winchester   Supernatural   84563   M/M   White 2   0   Sherlock Holmes/John Watson   Sherlock (TV)   61544   M/M   White 3   0   Derek Hale/Stiles Stilinski   Teen Wolf (TV)   59286   M/M   White 4   0   James "Bucky" Barnes/Steve Rogers   Captain America (Movies)   49659   M/M   White 5   0   Draco Malfoy/Harry Potter   Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling   40312   M/M   White 6   1   Steve Rogers/Tony Stark   The Avengers (Marvel Movies)   36264   M/M   White 7   -1   Harry Styles/Louis Tomlinson   One Direction (Band)   33126   M/M   White 8   0   Keith/Lance (Voltron)   Voltron: Legendary Defender   30317   M/M   Amb/POC 9   50   Aziraphale/Crowley (Good Omens)   Good Omens (TV)   28208   M/M   White 10   -1   Dean Winchester/Sam Winchester   Supernatural   27696   M/M   White 11   0   Magnus Bane/Alec Lightwood   Shadowhunters (TV)   24787   M/M   Whi/POC 12   -2   Katsuki Yuuri/Victor Nikiforov   Yuri!!! on Ice (Anime)   24333   M/M   Whi/POC 13   0   Jeon Jungkook/Kim Taehyung | V   Bangtan Boys | BTS   23339   M/M   POC 14   15   Rey/Ben Solo | Kylo Ren   Star Wars Sequel Trilogy   21306   F/M   White 15   -1   Min Yoongi | Suga/Park Jimin   Bangtan Boys | BTS   19851   M/M   POC 16   4   Adrien Agreste | Chat Noir/Marinette Dupain-Cheng | Ladybug   Miraculous Ladybug   19631   F/M   Whi/POC 17   -5   Merlin/Arthur Pendragon (Merlin)   Merlin (TV)   18688   M/M   White 18   7   Jeon Jungkook/Park Jimin   Bangtan Boys | BTS   17867   M/M   POC 19   0   Sirius Black/Remus Lupin   Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling   17686   M/M   White 20   -5   Sherlock Holmes & John Watson   Sherlock (TV)   17417   Gen   White 21   0   Pepper Potts/Tony Stark   Marvel Cinematic Universe   17384   F/M   White 22   18   Peter Parker & Tony Stark   Marvel Cinematic Universe   17366   Gen   White 23   -7   Dan Howell/Phil Lester   Phandom/The Fantastic Foursome (YouTube RPF)   17316   M/M   White 24   -6   Will Graham/Hannibal Lecter   Hannibal (TV)   17257   M/M   White 25   21   Bakugou Katsuki/Midoriya Izuku   Boku no Hero Academia | My Hero Academia   16824   M/M   POC 26   -3   Kim Namjoon | RM/Kim Seokjin | Jin   Bangtan Boys | BTS   16682   M/M   POC 27   -10   Blaine Anderson/Kurt Hummel   Glee   16175   M/M   Whi/POC 28   24   Bakugou Katsuki/Kirishima Eijirou   Boku no Hero Academia | My Hero Academia   15375   M/M   POC 29   -5   Erik Lehnsherr/Charles Xavier   X-Men (Alternate Timeline Movies)   14736   M/M   White 30   -8   Levi/Eren Yeager   Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan   14304   M/M   White 31   22   Midoriya Izuku/Todoroki Shouto   Boku no Hero Academia | My Hero Academia   14073   M/M   POC 32   -2   Keith/Shiro (Voltron)   Voltron: Legendary Defender   13925   M/M   Amb/POC 33   -5   Armitage Hux/Ben Solo | Kylo Ren   Star Wars Sequel Trilogy   13475   M/M   White 34   -8   Gabriel/Sam Winchester   Supernatural   13166   M/M   White 35   N   Lán Zhàn | Lán Wàngjī/Wèi Yīng | Wèi Wúxiàn   魔道祖师 - 墨香铜臭 | Módào Zǔshī - Mòxiāng Tóngxiù   13132   M/M   POC 36   14   Kara Danvers/Lena Luthor   Supergirl (TV 2015)   13048   F/F   White 37   -10   Jensen Ackles/Jared Padalecki   Supernatural RPF   13046   M/M   White 38   -7   Loki/Thor (Marvel)   Thor (Movies)   12863   M/M   White 39   -6   Bellamy Blake/Clarke Griffin   The 100 (TV)   12750   F/M   Whi/POC 40   2   Jung Hoseok | J-Hope/Min Yoongi | Suga   Bangtan Boys | BTS   12668   M/M   POC 41   -6   Evil Queen | Regina Mills/Emma Swan   Once Upon a Time (TV)   12286   F/F   Whi/POC 42   N   Eddie Kaspbrak/Richie Tozier   IT (Movies – Muschietti)   12227   M/M   White 43   -6   James T. Kirk/Spock   Star Trek: Alternate Original Series (Movies)   12015   M/M   White 44   -10   Rodney McKay/John Sheppard   Stargate Atlantis   11951   M/M   White 45   -9   Steve McGarrett/Danny "Danno" Williams   Hawaii Five-0 (2010)   11750   M/M   White 46   2   Hermione Granger/Ron Weasley   Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling   11700   F/M   Whi/Amb 47   -9   Clarke Griffin/Lexa   The 100 (TV)   11651   F/F   White 48   -7   Harry Potter/Severus Snape   Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling   11582   M/M   White 49   -5   Ian Gallagher/Mickey Milkovich   Shameless (US)   11436   M/M   White 50   -11   Clint Barton/Natasha Romanov   The Avengers (Marvel Movies)   11340   F/M   White 51   6   Iwaizumi Hajime/Oikawa Tooru   Haikyuu!!   11155   M/M   POC 52   -20   Oliver Queen/Felicity Smoak   Arrow (TV 2012)   11147   F/M   White 53   -10   Clint Barton/Phil Coulson   The Avengers (Marvel Movies)   10642   M/M   White 54   -9   Enjolras/Grantaire (Les Misérables)   Les Misérables - All Media Types   10604   M/M   White 55   11   Hinata Shouyou/Kageyama Tobio   Haikyuu!!   10486   M/M   POC 56   -7   Mycroft Holmes/Lestrade   Sherlock (TV)   10450   M/M   White 57   -10   Captain Hook | Killian Jones/Emma Swan   Once Upon a Time (TV)   10301   F/M   White 58   11   Hermione Granger/Draco Malfoy   Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling   10190   F/M   Whi/Amb 59   6   James Potter/Lily Evans Potter   Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling   10125   F/M   White 60   13   Kim Taehyung | V/Park Jimin   Bangtan Boys | BTS   9891   M/M   POC 61   -10   Bilbo Baggins/Thorin Oakenshield   The Hobbit - All Media Types   9875   M/M   White 62   -2   Loki/Tony Stark   The Avengers (Marvel Movies)   9781   M/M   White 63   -5   Jack Harkness/Ianto Jones   Torchwood   9666   M/M   White 64   -9   Frank Iero/Gerard Way   My Chemical Romance   9574   M/M   White 65   -11   Tenth Doctor/Rose Tyler   Doctor Who (2005)   9568   F/M   White 66   5   Jeon Jungkook/Min Yoongi | Suga   Bangtan Boys | BTS   9498   M/M   POC 67   -3   James "Bucky" Barnes & Steve Rogers   Captain America (Movies)   9347   Gen   White 68   4   Harry Potter/Ginny Weasley   Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling   9269   F/M   White 69   -8   Castiel & Dean Winchester   Supernatural   9122   Gen   White 70   -14   Zayn Malik/Liam Payne   One Direction (Band)   8967   M/M   Whi/POC 71   -3   Fox Mulder/Dana Scully   The X-Files   8825   F/M   White 72   4   Dean Winchester & Sam Winchester   Supernatural   8791   Gen   White 73   N   Dazai Osamu/Nakahara Chuuya (Bungou Stray Dogs)   文豪ストレイドッグス | Bungou Stray Dogs   8768   M/M   POC 74   -12   Sherlock Holmes/Molly Hooper   Sherlock (TV)   8560   F/M   White 75   -8   Inquisitor/Cullen Rutherford   Dragon Age: Inquisition   8175   Other   Whi/Amb 76   N   Aziraphale & Crowley (Good Omens)   Good Omens (TV)   7928   Gen   White 77   -14   Belle/Rumplestiltskin | Mr. Gold   Once Upon a Time (TV)   7927   F/M   White 78   -3   James T. Kirk/Leonard "Bones" McCoy   Star Trek: Alternate Original Series (Movies)   7855   M/M   White 79   4   James "Bucky" Barnes/Reader   Marvel Cinematic Universe   7724   Other   Whi/Amb 80   6   Uchiha Sasuke/Uzumaki Naruto   Naruto   7705   M/M   POC 81   N   Akaashi Keiji/Bokuto Koutarou   Haikyuu!!   7629   M/M   POC 82   -8   Allison Argent/Scott McCall   Teen Wolf (TV)   7592   F/M   Whi/POC 83   N   Geralt z Rivii | Geralt of Rivia/Jaskier | Dandelion   The Witcher (TV)   7573   M/M   White 84   -14   Dean Winchester/You   Supernatural   7555   Other   Whi/Amb 85   4   James "Bucky" Barnes/Tony Stark   Marvel Cinematic Universe   7456   M/M   White 86   -7   Arthur/Eames (Inception)   Inception (2010)   7397   M/M   White 87   -10   Jim Ellison/Blair Sandburg   The Sentinel (TV)   7366   M/M   White 88   N   Aizawa Shouta | Eraserhead/Yamada Hizashi | Present Mic   Boku no Hero Academia | My Hero Academia   7325   M/M   POC 89   9   Poe Dameron/Finn   Star Wars Sequel Trilogy   7239   M/M   POC 90   -6   Peter Parker/Wade Wilson   Spider-Man - All Media Types   7206   M/M   White 91   4   Kim Taehyung | V/Min Yoongi | Suga   Bangtan Boys | BTS   7176   M/M   POC 92   -14   Josh Dun/Tyler Joseph   Twenty One Pilots   7082   M/M   Whi/POC 93   N   Jaime Lannister/Brienne of Tarth   Game of Thrones (TV)   7063   F/M   White 94   -9   Peter Hale/Stiles Stilinski   Teen Wolf (TV)   7047   M/M   White 95   -2   Jon Snow/Sansa Stark   Game of Thrones (TV)   6939   F/M   White 96   -15   James Bond/Q   James Bond (Craig movies)   6897   M/M   White 97   -17   Otabek Altin/Yuri Plisetsky   Yuri!!! on Ice (Anime)   6876   M/M   Whi/POC 98   -16   Leo Fitz/Jemma Simmons   Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. (TV)   6824   F/M   White 99   N   Byun Baekhyun/Park Chanyeol   EXO (Band)   6630   M/M   POC 100   N   Rey & Ben Solo | Kylo Ren   Star Wars Sequel Trilogy   6506   Gen   White

[flowerfan2]

Group Texts Are Ridiculous (Or, Five-0 Starts a Group Text)

McDanno, T, A03

Summary:  After Steve leaves Oahu to go find himself, Five-0 starts a group text to keep in touch while Steve’s away.  Picks up after the end of Season 10.

Notes:  This story is set in the present, following 10x22, but there’s no COVID in it.  I wanted it to be fun.  The story is complete and will be posted over the next few weeks.  Many thanks as always to my awesome beta, @perryavenue. And apologies in advance for any formatting errors on tumblr, I spent forever fixing it up for A03 and it probably won’t translate easily at this point!

Chapter 1

April 2, 2020

Group message:  Tani Rey, Junior Reigns, Lou Grover

TR:  You guys going over to Steve’s to say goodbye tomorrow?

 JR:  Yeah.  Still think we should have a party.

 LG:  The man’s had two parties and a lunch already – how many send offs does he need?

 JR:  I don’t know, he didn’t seem to like them very much.  Maybe he needs a better one.  With just us.

 TR:  He’ll be fine.  Plus, there’s not really any time left.

 JR:  What about tonight?  He’s not coming in today, right?

 TR:  He’s got plans, Junes.

 JR:  He does?  I thought he said he had work to do around the house?  We could bring pizza and beer, help him out.

 LG:  He’s got plans with Danny.

 JR:  Danny won’t mind the help – he’d be happier supervising, anyway.

 TR:  Lou, what are we going to do with him?

 LG:  No idea.  Nothing’s worked so far.

 JR:  Are you guys talking about me?  That’s not very cool.  At least fill me in.

 TR:  Sweet Junes, if you haven’t figured it out by now, I’m not sure we can help.

 LG:  But bring that beer over to my place tonight, and I’ll do my best.

 TR:  I’ll bring chips.

  April 3, 2020

 JR:  Okay now I feel really bummed out.  Why did Steve leave Danny down on the beach like that?  We should have had a party.

 TR:  Chill, Junes, he’ll be ok.  He’s just sad.

 JR:  Do you mean Danny or Steve?

 LG:  Yes.

 JR:  But Steve is the one who decided to leave, he shouldn’t be sad – I don’t get it.

 LG:  It’s not a straightforward situation.

 TR:  Good one, Lou.

 JR:  I feel like I’m still missing something.

 TR:  Wouldn’t be the first time.

 JR:  Hey, should we add Adam to the text?  Because he’s standing over there petting Eddie and it feels kind of awkward that we’re all texting.

 TR:  Sure, Adam is definitely sort of not really barely on Five 0 these days… why not add Jerry while you’re at it?

 JR:  Okay.

 LG:  I think Tani was joking.  But we should add Danny and Steve, it’ll give us an easy way to keep in touch while Steve’s away.

 TR:  You think it’ll work?

 LG:  Look at that sad boy down there on the beach.  It couldn’t hurt.

 TR:  Sounds good.

 JR: …so should I add Adam or not?

  April 5, 2020

 JR has changed the name of the group text to Keeping in Touch with Commander McGarrett

 JR:  How’s your trip so far, Commander?

 SM:  No need to be so formal, Junior.  And good, thanks.  Ran into an old friend.

 TR:  Wow, so we’re going to start with that, are we?  You know Danny’s in the chat, right?

 DW:  How do you think Chin knew Steve’s flight info?

 TR:  Wait, so the old friend was Chin?

 SM:  Yeah, Catherine was surprised, too.  She thought I was going to Tahoe with her.  Not sure where she got that idea.

 DW:  Careful what you say, there are kids present.

 SM:  I didn’t say anything bad.

 DW:  You were thinking it.

 LG:  Not to change the subject or anything, but how are Abby and Sara doing?

 SM:  They’re great.  Sara’s adorable.  Smart as a whip, too.  

 DW:  You gonna stay in San Fran a while?

 SM:  Yeah, a week or two.  See the sights.  I hear they have some great Italian restaurants.

 DW:  Now you’re just being mean.

 SM:  Nothing could rival your lasagna, Danny.

 DW:  Aw, you’re forgiven.

 SM:  Anyway, thanks for giving Chin the heads up that I was coming, Danny.

 DW:  No problem.  Had to make sure you weren’t going to immediately start free climbing rock faces or something.  Need to at least let the jet lag settle.

 LG:  Say hi to the Kelly clan for me, will you?

 SM:  Of course.  Gotta go, Abby and Sara want to take me to Alcatraz.

 DW:  By boat, right?

 SM:  Danno, people swim away from Alcatraz, not to it.

 DW:  Leave it to you to start a new trend.

  <b>April 24, 2020</b>

 <i>JR has changed the name of the group text to</i> <b>Keeping in Touch with Steve</b>

 SM:  Hey, just want to let you guys know that I’m going to be out of contact for a while.

 DW:  As opposed to the past few days, when you answered approximately 5% of my texts?

 LG:  You headed out into the woods?

 SM:  Desert, but yeah.  Gonna do some camping.

 DW:  Maybe you’ll see a bear.  Beat some sense into you.

 JR:  Are there bears in the desert?

 TR:  No, but there are snakes.  And spiders. Be careful, those things can be vicious.

 DW:  Yeah, careful is his middle name.

 JR:  What’s Danny so mad about?

 TR:  Not the time, Junes.

 DW:  I’m not mad, I just know how he is.  He’s probably hoping to see some snakes.  Maybe shoot a rattler, cook one over his campfire.

 SM:  I have no intention of shooting anything, I’m just going camping.

 DW:  Since when is going anywhere without shooting something fun for you?

 SM:  I’m not exactly here to have fun.

 TR:  Um, Steve, you okay?

 SM:  Signing off.  Talk to you guys later.  Give Eddie a hug for me, I miss that big guy.

  April 25, 2020

 TR:  Junes, you awake?

 JR:  Yes, are you?

 JR:  That was a joke, I know you’re awake, you texted me first.

 JR:  This is just a text between us, right?

 TR:  Yeah, it’s just us.  Lou and I are done with the stake-out, we handed it off to HPD.  Lou’s driving me home.

 JR:  Did you talk to him about Danny and Steve?  Danny seemed pissed in the group text.  What’s going on?  

 TR:  I tried, but if Lou knows what’s going on, he’s being unusually tight lipped.

 JR:  I wish Danny was back at work.  It’s weird with both him and McGarrett not there.

 TR:  He’s got at least another two weeks until his ribs heal enough to get cleared to return to active duty, at least that’s what he told me yesterday.

 JR:  Can’t he come back to headquarters, though?  I would have thought he’d want to come back, especially with him being in charge now.

 TR:  Temporarily in charge.

 JR:  Yeah, whatever.  Didn’t really sound like that when the governor stopped by, did it?

 TR:  I don’t know, Junior, I really don’t.  But Danny doesn’t really seem eager to get back to work.  Maybe he’s had it with us.

 JR:  With Five-0?  You think he’s gonna do the restaurant thing again?

 TR:  No, that was a disaster.

 JR:  Well, I hope Danny comes back to Five-0.  Otherwise Adam might think he’s got a permanent spot.

 TR:  You really don’t like Adam much, do you?

 JR:  I don’t know, he seems to have an explanation for everything.  But I don’t trust him.  Not like Steve and Danny.

 TR:  I miss them too.  But Danny’s around anytime you want to talk to him.  He whispered in my ear for two hours yesterday when I was questioning that record store owner who tried his hand at money laundering.

 JR:  But Steve’s been pretty out of touch.

 TR:  I think that was the idea of his trip.  It’s definitely going to be a long summer.

 JR:  You think Steve won’t be back until fall?

 TR:  That’s my bet.  September, refreshed and ready to go.  But I really don’t have a clue.  What do you think?

 JR:  Sooner than September, that’s ages, Tani.  Why does he need to be away so long?

 TR:  You’d have to ask him.

 JR:  Tani?

 TR:  Yeah?

 JR:  One more thing… I think we forgot to put Quinn in the text group.

 TR:  Shit.

 May 4, 2020

 LG:  Grace has got skills, Danny.  She’s beating Steve at his own game!

 TR:  Um, what are you talking about, Lou?

 LG:  Steve and Grace went surfing in L.A.  Big waves, too.  Didn’t you see the pics on Facebook?

 DW:  You’re showing your age, Lou.  Facebook is for old people.

 LG:  Grace posted on it, she’s not old.

 DW:  She only puts pics on there when she wants her parents and grandparents to see them.  They’re carefully curated.

 TR:  Why am I not Facebook friends with Grace?  I feel left out.

 JR:  Ditto.

 DW:  You should both feel free to friend her.  I’m sure she’d friend you back.

 TR:  I’ll look for her insta instead.  Probably get better stuff.

 LG:  Do you even know Grace?

 TR:  Rude.

 JR:  Ditto again.

 DW:  That’s the same thing.

 JR:  No, I’m actually saying ditto for the second time.

 LG:  This group text is more ridiculous than Grace’s sanitized Facebook page.  

 TR:  At least if Steve’s surfing we know he made it out of the desert.

 LG:  On a horse with no name.

 DW:  Now you really sound old.

 TR:  Dad joke alert.

 LG:  What’s wrong with dad jokes?  I am a dad, after all.  I’m quite proud of being a dad.  I deserve to make dad jokes.

 TR:  Try making better ones, at least.

 LG:  Danny, you’re a proud dad.  Back me up here.

 DW:  Proud, yes.  As uncool as you, no.  

 TR:  Settle down, you’re both old and uncool, no need to get worked up about it.

 DW:  Fine.  This old guy is staring at some very nice looking steaks, and was planning on lighting the grill soon.  Assuming you’re still willing to eat my food despite my advanced age.

 JR:  Tani and I are getting in the car now, we’ll stop for beer on the way. Jerry said he was coming, too, and bringing fruit salad with no pineapple, just for you.

 DW:  Yet another reason I like Jerry.  And did you guys talk to Quinn and apologize for not including her in the group text?

 TR:  I did, and she actually seemed relieved not to have to deal with us all outside of work.

 DW:  Seriously?

 TR:  No, of course not.  I already added her.  She’s on now.

 QL:  Hi guys.  Danny, thanks for inviting me.  I’m bringing margaritas and guac.

 DW:  See, already glad you’re in the chat.  Sorry Tani forgot you.

 TR:  I did not forget Quinn!  

 LG:  Tani has been suitably repentant, Danny, don’t worry.  And do put my name on two of those steaks - Renee made her special chocolate cake with mocha buttercream.  We’ll be there soon.

 DW:  Does your wife think I’m dying or something?  She only makes that cake when someone’s sick.

 TR has changed the name of the group text to Chocolate Cake For the Detective’s Soul

 TR:  Maybe she thinks it’ll make your ribs heal faster, so you can come back to work and make sure Lou doesn’t do anything stupid.

 DW:  Tani, not for nothing, but it’s not Lou I’m worried about.

 TR:  That building wasn’t that tall.  I landed in the pool, and apprehended the suspect on the way down.

 DW:  I rest my case.