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#surrender the night/gun -> the only hope for me is you
once again listening to conventional weapons my favorite part of the whole collection is being able to like. instantly tell what songs got reworked into which songs off danger days
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charliehoennam · 5 months
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birthday bliss
Summary: Will doesn't usually celebrate his birthday so you decide to do something special for him in your first year of dating
Pairing: Will Miller x F!Reader
Warnings: Fluffing smut | 18+ ONLY
SHARING IS CARING, SO PLEASE REBLOG
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The sun is still shyly rising when your eyes blink open.
The morning chill lingers, leaving the air cold beyond the warm covers that encapsulate you and Will's large frame.
As you turn to the other side to face him, you smile to yourself. He's facing, laying on his side facing you with his arm stretched out lazily under his - and your - pillows. His other hand is tucked closely to his face as he rests peacefully, although his fluttering eyelids indicate he's awake.
It's his birthday again and you really want to do something special for him. You know he's not a big fan of large gatherings, so a surprise party was definitely out of the question.
His birthdays used to be special for him as a child because his dad would always take him camping in the woods as a special father/son bonding moment, especially after Ben came along. Knowing that he doesn't feel like his birthday is special anymore, just because he's adult and his dad is so far away, kinda makes you feel sad.
Moving closer to his warmth, you pepper his face with tender kisses as the blond whiskers of his beard twitch into a smile with his eyes still closed.
"You're gonna make it harder to get out of bed like that" he mumbles in a gravelly morning voice.
"Well, maybe you don't have to get out of bed just yet. It is your birthday after all."
"Just another day is all, baby."
His arm lowers to drape over your side as he shifts to make room for you as he pulls you into his embrace. You settle, laying on your side as he rests his head against your chest and tangles his leg between yours, cocooning himself in your warmth. He can't remember the last time he felt so safe and cozy. The only present he could want right now is to spend hours with you just like this.
Instinctively, your arm wraps his head to mindlessly play with his soft short hair, unintentionally persuading him to surrender into staying in bed.
"I know you don't like to do much to celebrate, but do you have any plans?"
"Probably just gonna get a couple beers with the guys after work. Then come home."
His face is still resting against your chest, inhaling the combination of your sweet natural scent and the vanilla lotion you always wear.
"You should come with us" he continues lazily.
"Nah. Guys' night is your thing. Besides, it'll give me time to get your gift ready."
He smirks as he pulls his head back to look up at him. He told you not to spend any money on him, but the smile on his face only proves how he'd hoped you would.
"I thought I told you not to spend any money on that."
"You did, but why would I listen to that?" you smirk back at him.
"Do I get any clues?"
"Nope. You gotta wait and see."
"Aw, c'mon, baby. Don't be like that."
The way he rolls you onto your back and nestles his hips between your legs indicates he's thought of a way to get you to surrender, but you're sticking to your guns on this.
"It won't be a surprise if I tell you."
"You don't have to tell me. All I'm asking for a clue," he mumbles smirking against your skin as he begins kissing and nibbling your neck.
You shake your head as your legs mindlessly wrap around his waist to invite him close. You giggle as he pins your hands under your pillow, grinding his hardening cock against your panties and eliciting a man from your throat.
"i know what you're doing, Will. It's not gonna work."
"It may not work, but it gives me an excuse to try anyway."
His lips smile into the kiss as he presses them against yours with a tender touch. You welcome it open-heartedly, letting your tongues lazily battle for dominance as he savors your kiss.
All those days and nights spent far from you has taught him to be so much more appreciative of every moment.
Allowing your hands to escape from his grip, he allows them to latch onto him, threading your fingers through his golden hair and placing another hand on his back to pull him closer as he continues to tease your dampening panties.
The thin fabric of his boxers does nothing to omit the size of his dick. Just thinking about his thick girth makes you water, but feeling it press and grind against you leaves you drenched.
Will can feel your slick soaking through his garment, making him moan and crave you even more.
Using one arm to hold him up so he doesn't smother you with his heavy weight, he slides his hand down from underneath your pillow and cradles the side of your face with his large palm.
He wishes he could freeze the world, that the man-made concept didn't exist so he could spend the rest of eternity in this bed with you.
"I don't need a present, babe" he says softly with a heart-warming smile as he stands on his knees to take off his your shirt off.
The morning chill turns into hot, humid air as you watch his beautiful form glistening in the tropical glow of the autumnal sunrise casting from the window.
"I already have you. You're everything I could ever ask for."
Speechless from his confession, your arms greet him as he moves back down to continue your passionate kiss.
He takes his time to gradually move lower to your neck and then to your exposed breasts, leaving faint red burns from his beard scratching against your sensitive skin.
Your back arches into him as his hands cup and knead your breasts. Your hands cradle the back of Will's head while his mouth suckles on your nipple, one at a time, tongue swirling and flicking over the hardened nub.
Praises flood from your mouth, telling him how much you love him and how good his attention feels.
Sliding your panties off, he soon nestles himself lower and trail painstakingly slow kisses down your legs, making you giggle in the way he loves the most at how his beard tickles.
He chuckles but doesn't stop, nor speed up, until his mouth finally reaches your pussy. Your legs slide to hang over his strong shoulders as his large hands wrap around your thighs to pull you in closer.
He knows you're desperate for any sort of friction you can get, but he takes his times to kiss your mound and outer labia, making you laugh at his calculated torture.
"Will, c'mon. Don't be mean."
"I'm just showing my woman some 'preciation is all."
His sly smile and mischievous blue eyes make you melt from within. The first lick he gives your wet plushy lips has goosebumps running up your arms.
Will takes his time exploring your pussy with his tongue, extending his arms to wrap around your hips to use his fingers and hold your pussy open for him so he can savour every drop of your wetness.
His eyes close as he relishes your sweet and savory taste, moaning as his eager hips buck against the mattress.
He would tell you how good you taste, but he can't be bothered to part from you even for a minute. And you're thankful he doesn't because the way his nose nudges your clit has you squirming underneath him already.
He moans loudly as you tug on his hair, grinding yourself against his face as you beg for more. The tip of his cock is already leaking with arousal and excitement, forming a little wet spot on his boxers.
His tongue moves expertly as it trails over your pussy, slipping in and out of your entrance to tease your sensitive nub.
His long calloused finger slides into your hole, massaging the wet silky walls as his tongue continues to torment your throbbing clit.
The pleasure quickly becomes too much to handle when he slips another finger into you, making you clench around them desperately imagining his cock inside you.
The building pressure finally explodes in your core, rippling through you as your legs try to shut his head between them while you catch your breath.
Needless to say, you both arrive at work late after going at it for a couple hours.
Using a couple of the extra hours you had put in, you clock out early and race home to prepare Will's big surprise.
You and Will were avid 'woodspeople'. You liked a good hike together, exploring new trails and sites, and camping in the woods so you're not exactly an amateur when it comes to setting up a tent. Or at least you thought you weren't until you realize Will had usually been the one to take care of you and you just assisted as best as you could. You just couldn't understand why it was so damn hard.
It takes you a almost an hour to set it up in the backyard, but once it's done, you move on to starting a nice warm fire in the large iron fire pit bowl. Thankfully, that goes a lot easier than the previous task.
Laying a blanket out over the grass, you take a few of the living room cushion pillows to arrange them out on the blanket while, in the middle, a rustic wooden basket full of all Will's favorite snacks and treats sits propped in the middle.
You load the white cooler with plenty of ice, soda and beer and let it rest beside the blanket when he texts you that let you know he's on his way home.
It's not much and it's not the same as real camping, but you hope it's enough to make him smile at least.
Will has shared plenty of stories about his camping tradition with his father over the years and you could tell those moments were so special to him. You never missed the little gleam in his eyes when he'd told you he could point out all the constellations in the sky better than his old man or the different ways of stacking wood for a fire for different purposes.
He told you about how it's been a couple years since he's done anything other than going out with the guys for a couple beers and laughs. It seems like it became his new tradition and, although he was content with it, you just want him to know how much you care about him.
So, after setting a couple more folded up blankets out to shield you both from the cold night air later on, you race over to the door to wait anxiously for him.
The bar isn't too far from your shared home. Being only 15 minutes away, he'll be home in no time.
You see his truck driving up the road and your heart races at the sound of the gravel crunching under his tires. He climbs out, looking as handsome as he always does in his simple attire. Just a blue long-sleeved flannel, his favorite olive green jacket, a slightly torn blue cap that he's used too many times and refuses to part with and work boots that he usually wears to the construction work he takes up in between his motivational military speeches.
Will can't help but grin at you as he spots you in the window, walking up the driveway with a hand tucked into the pocket of his jacket as the other lifts his hat to take it off to greet you with a kiss.
"What are you all smiles about?" he questions as he set his cap back on.
"Your present!" you giggle excitedly. He laughs along with you, adoring your excitement. He knows you're up to something."Do you wanna see it?"
"Let's see it, babe. Lead the way."
"Alright, but you can't see yet."
You quickly move behind him to reach up and cover his eyes. He laughs at the silliness, but he goes along with it because in truth, he's pretty excited himself.
You try your best to guide him down the hall and through the living room to get to the sliding glass door.
"Watch your step. We're gonna step outside" you alert, so he holds out his hands to feel for the door's frame as he carefully steps out into the backyard porch.
"Ready? 3,2,1!"
You remove your hands to allow him to see your surprise.
At first, his silence fills you with worry as he takes in the camping tent you'd pitched and the picnic you'd set up in the comfort of your own yard.
"So? D-do you like it?"
"You did all this just for me?" his voice is lowered to a whisper as he looks at you in disbelief.
"Yeah... you told me you had a little tradition with your dad. And obviously I'm not your dad and it's not the same but-"
"No, it's not. It's so much better," he confirms with a sniffling grin as he wraps his long arms around you tightly. "I can't believe you went through all this trouble."
"It was no trouble. Well, the tent did almost give me a black eye, but it was worth it."
"This is the kindest thing anyone's ever done for me, babe..." he says as he looks back over at the picnic. Your heart breaks a bit to hear that something so simple has never been for him before, but you're just happy to watch him wipe his tears of joy away.
"Happy birthday, Will.
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musamora · 1 year
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𝖓𝖎𝖈𝖐𝖓𝖆𝖒𝖊𝖘 「𝔪𝔲𝔩𝔱𝔦」 ༉‧₊˚
characters. bungou stray dogs. osamu dazai, chuuya nakahara, fyodor dostoevsky, nikolai gogol, sigma.
content. f!reader. mentions of violence, mentions of suicide attempts (dazai), alcohol (chuuya), harassment (chuuya), cussing, general sappiness. not proofread.
author's note. this started as a writing exercise to get my writing inspo flowing again, and then i began working on it on and off for a week. so enjoy! this is also an attempt to nail some of their character's down, so hopefully it isn't too OOC.
would you like to see more? join the taglist or comment under this post!
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synopsis. what nicknames do the bungo stray dogs boys call their girlfriend?
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𝗢𝗦𝗔𝗠𝗨 𝗗𝗔𝗭𝗔𝗜 ⋆⁺₊ ⸺⸺⸺
𝗗𝗘𝗔𝗥 ⋆ 𝗕𝗘𝗟𝗟𝗔𝗗𝗢𝗡𝗡𝗔 ⋆ (𝗡𝗔𝗠𝗘)-𝗖𝗛𝗔𝗡
The darkened alleyway had become thick with the stench of gunpowder and smoke, streetlights barely illuminating your path in the hush of night. You patrolled the area with quick, swift feet, hovering your gun near your hip in case of an ambush. Each step made your heart pound, sweat mixing with humidity to drench your skin as you inched toward the corner.
However, to both your dismay and prediction, Dazai wasn't taking this mission seriously—though he rarely did. It both aggravated and appeased you, knowing that if the situation became dangerous, he'd straighten up in a heartbeat. That didn't mean that his blissed smile and the skip in his step as he went on about the euphoria of death and the many methods he could die from didn't unnerve you.
Knowing him, he wouldn't mind getting shot.
"You know, my dear," he smirked, leaning close to your shoulder to whisper into your ear. "You're very sexy when you're serious." "Dazai," you chided, face stilled into an unamused expression. He fell back dramatically, flailing his hands into the air in surrender. "Oh, belladonna! That stern stare — I hope that beautiful expression is the last sight I see in this cruel world!" he cried, but much to his disdain, you had already rounded the corner, completely done with his antics. "(Name)-channnn!~ Don't leave me hereeee!"
𝗦𝗪𝗘𝗘𝗧𝗜𝗘 ⋆ 𝗛𝗢𝗡𝗘𝗬 ⋆ 𝗪𝗜𝗙𝗘𝗬
It had been a strenuous day at the office for everyone, including you—a plethora of insane missions always followed by mountains of paperwork that never seemed to end. It was almost too much to bear. You huffed, leaning against your hand as you desperately tried to not fall asleep due to your exhaustion.
A pair of large, warm hands rested on your shoulders, massaging just the right spots in your taut muscles. You sighed, allowing yourself to lean back in your chair and enjoy the temporary reprieve. However, the owner of those hands had different plans, hot breath blowing against your ear as he bent down to rest his chin on your shoulder. Dazai chuckled to himself, enjoying your immediate reaction to straighten up, eyes pointed to the screen in an effort to avoid reacting.
You were just too cute.
He cooed out a plethora of sweet nothings in a low, hushed timbre as he tempted a flustered expression out of your face. And one thing that everyone should know about Osamu Dazai—he always gets what he wants when he puts his mind to it.
"Heyyy, sweetie. How's the paperwork going?" You continued to type. "Why won't you pay attention to me!" he wailed, wrapping his arms around your shoulders as he slumped against you. "Come onnn, honey. Don't you love me anymore?" You typed harder. He sniffled. "My little wifey doesn't love me anymore." You paused. "Whaat? Too forward?"
𝗕𝗘𝗔𝗨𝗧𝗜𝗙𝗨𝗟
Only strays wandered the streets at this time of night, but Dazai found himself itching to join them with each passing second. Sleep never easily came to the former demon prodigy. He found that each time he closed his eyes, he was only met with flashes of the past and disillusions of the future. His sharp mind would continue to turn like a machine, processing every granule of information as if he were inspecting an hourglass—a process that had become routine for him.
"Osamu..."
However, your intrusion into his nightfall rituals had soothed his instinctual aches. His eyes glazed over your drowsy figure, admiring the displacement of your hair and the heaviness of your eyes with an emotion he could only describe as awe.
Because in these moments, you didn't even have to be awake and looking at him to make him feel invigorated—feel alive. And with you, he didn't hate being alive anymore, didn't hate acknowledging his human flaws and issues. He just embraced it, even for only a second.
The rational part of his brain dissipated when he felt your warm, bare skin brush against his bandages, snuggling up to him. He knew his brain became useless in your presence, overcome with pure adulation for your mind, your body, and your very soul. So instead, he pulled you close, nuzzling his face in your neck and listening to the rhythmic pulse of your heart as it worked to soothe him to sleep.
"Good night, beautiful."
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𝗖𝗛𝗨𝗨𝗬𝗔 𝗡𝗔𝗞𝗔𝗛𝗔𝗥𝗔 ⋆⁺₊ ⸺⸺⸺
𝗕𝗔𝗕𝗘
The murmurs of the restaurant had been dampened by a luxurious and vast velvet curtain, enclosing the entire booth to separate you from the other patrons. Lights sparkled from a dazzling chandelier, creating ribbons of gold and white on the tablecloth. This was a special occasion since you rarely had dates outside of your apartment. Chuuya always wanted to take you out more often, to show you off and treat you to the finest, but there never was time. So even when you insisted you could stay inside for a date this evening, he had already planned on spoiling you rotten.
He watched your expression between folded hands, hiding his smirk as the waiter set down an extremely expensive bottle of red wine. You had insisted on getting the more recent and cheaper version, not wanting to splurge too much—which, of course, insulted him. How could he not provide the best for his partner whenever he got the chance?
"Stop gaping, babe," he tutted at your widened eyes, tone lighter than the biting edge it usually held. "Whaddya say we snap over the 1959 Chateau Latour, hm?"
𝗗𝗢𝗟𝗟 ⋆ 𝗕𝗔𝗕𝗬
You had been working the late shift at your office building, slaving the day away only to come out on the other side with an aching back and a small paycheck. Despite Chuuya's suggestion that you could quit your job and let him take care of you, you wanted to maintain your independence and some additional money, which he understood. So here you were, trudging home from the train station with heavy feet and tired eyes. Seeing the apartment complex in the distance made your heart soar, a pep in your step as you started to practically glide down the sidewalk.
"Heyyyy, baby. Lookin' good tonight. That outfit for me, huh?"
Grimacing, you ignored the disgusting cat-calls from the random stranger in favor of increasing your speed to reach the building. You could practically smell the woody cologne coming from Chuuya's jacket, but your blissful thoughts were interrupted by a set of hefty footsteps behind you. This would've been normal during the day, but no one else is out this late at night—except one person.
With tremoring fingers, you lifted your cell phone ever-so-slightly, finding that strange man walking at a brisk pace behind you in the reflection. It set off too many alarm bells in your head, and your walking turned into sprinting.
It just so happened that Chuuya was leaning on one of the pillars outside of your apartment complex. He never liked when you worked the late-shift, and he definitely didn't like when you walked home by yourself—however, you had insisted that you would be fine. He relented, enjoying the independent aspect of your personality, but he still had his precautions.
He straightened up with a passive expression when he saw your shadowed silhouette in the distance, but his eyes narrowed, and his shoulders tensed once he spotted the man who was running after you. Using his gravity manipulation, he pulled you closer to him and had the pervert sink into the ground, sizing him up with burning eyes.
His gloved hand went to your back, easing your trembling body. "Go inside, baby. You don't need'ta be involved in this shit." He watched carefully as you rushed inside the lobby, before slamming the man onto the hard concrete, a foot digging into his spine. "Listen, shithead. You ever look at my doll again, I fucking swear to God—" He never let you walk home alone after this, not like you were complaining much. And that man would never bother you again, if he was even still capable of walking.
𝗣𝗥𝗜𝗡𝗖𝗘𝗦𝗦
It had been an absolutely draining day for Chuuya. With his position as an executive, you would assume that he wouldn't have to deal with the low-life freeloaders that the Port Mafia was bound to have, but it was exactly the opposite. He had been stuck for hours finishing a bunch of incident reports due to the destruction of properties on the southwestern side of Yokohama—incidents he was somehow not involved in.
He groaned as he entered the apartment, shrugging off his jacket and hanging it with his hat before a hearty aroma hit him. He followed his nose to the stove, finding an intricately wrapped dish with a note taped on top.
Make sure you eat before you go to bed. You need to grow big and strong. Love you! ♥
If it were from anyone else, he would've ripped the note apart when he hit the jab at his height—and he definitely scowled a bit—but there was a hint of endearance in his expression. He lifted the tin foil covering the food, feasting on the sight of penne alla vodka.
A raspy sound took him out of his ogling, his eyes scanning the darkened living room to find the one person he had been dying to see—you. And what a sight you were, drool trailed down your chin, a half-empty dish of pasta lying limply in your arms, and hair tousled as your neck bent at an awkward angle to rest against the cushions.
He couldn't help a small laugh at the sight, placing your plate on the coffee table and wiping the baby hairs out of your face, leaving a fleeting kiss on your forehead. In moments like this, with the disarray and train wreck his life had been, he found himself grateful for such simple, domestic sights. It enveloped him in a sense of peace, feeling at home for the first time.
"Hey, princess," he whispered with another peck to your temple. "I'm home."
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𝗙𝗬𝗢𝗗𝗢𝗥 𝗗𝗢𝗦𝗧𝗢𝗘𝗩𝗦𝗞𝗬 ⋆⁺₊ ⸺⸺⸺
The pet names featured below are in Russian.
𝗗𝗘𝗔𝗥
Fyodor rarely, if ever, used nicknames of any kind in public. With his specific occupation, it would be detrimental to reveal any kind of attachment to anyone, regardless of whether you were capable of defending yourself. However, rarely does not mean never.
It was an unusual occasion; a completely public date at a local café—you knew that he loved his tea and suggested it in the off-chance that it would possibly sway him to join you. You assumed that he'd say no, but he always found himself having a hard time denying you when you proposed it so sweetly.
However, you knew that you needed to be efficient with your time. You enjoy each other's company in a secluded corner of the café while also multitasking on your own work. The room emitted a wonderful ambiance that made you feel productive and inspired, though it was simultaneously cozy enough to relax in—for you, that was. Most of Fyodor's work required him to be in seclusion, so instead he enjoyed the view—both of the skies outside and a couple of stray glimpses at you.
"Drink for (Name)," a barista called.
Fyodor looked toward you expectantly, but you were far too in your own little world to notice. He would've normally broken your workflow, but he found himself oddly compelled to let you continue—he was awfully fond of the way your brows narrowed as you concentrated. So instead, he retrieved your drink, settling it on the table with a small clink.
"Here you are, dear."
𝗠𝗜𝗟𝗔𝗬𝗔 (милая) ⋆ 𝗥𝗔𝗗𝗡𝗔𝗬𝗔 (радная) ⋆ 𝗟𝗨𝗕𝗜𝗠𝗔𝗬𝗔 (любимая)
It was in the privacy of your shared home that his native tongue came out, engrossing you with his rich Russian accent—he knew the effect it had on you, so sometimes he toyed around with you by slipping it into everyday interactions.
You walked into his computer room, careful to not trip on wires as you carried in a steaming thermal mug of fresh black tea. He was often far too engrossed in his work to eat or drink, so you found the least you could do was to make him some tea whenever you weren't busy.
You placed it next to him, leaning over to take a curious glance at the screen—not understanding a word of it—and you were about to silently exit when he placed a cold hand on top of yours. Your brow raised, watching the smile that appeared on his lips.
"Thank you, милая." You sputtered over your words at the praise, watching in anticipation as he took a sip. He hummed at the nectarous flavor, slouching as the tea worked to soothe his throat. The tea circled in the mug as he swirled it, watching carefully as he could feel your composure melt away. "Delicious as always, радная." You mumbled a quick thank you, turning like a gazelle on your heel to escape his predatory gaze, but his hand pulled you back. Completely captive in his hold, you looked back, a knowing smirk on his face. "Stay for a moment, любимая. I'd like to hear your thoughts on something."
𝗠𝗬𝗦𝗛𝗞𝗔 (мышка)
You honestly had no clue how you had gotten into this position.
One moment, you were cleaning around various rooms, making sure everything was dusted and organized. The next, you were sitting in Fyodor's lap—though you couldn't say you minded. An occasional hum vibrated against the top of your head as Fyodor concentrated on a book in one hand, the other fastened securely around your waist, rubbing circles into the clothed skin.
It took every ounce of self-control you had to limit your face to a neutral glance, staring at the words in his Russian novel as if you were trying to decipher them—you were; you didn't know a lick of the language. You leaned against his shoulder, listening to the faint thump of his heartbeat as it lured you into relaxation. His eyes began to drift from the page, finding your internal struggle incredibly amusing. He titled his face, holding back a smirk when you made a startled noise from a kiss to the temple.
Cute.
In these moments, he felt human again. Everywhere else in the world, he was either treated as a god or a demon—and that was the way he had orchestrated it. But here, in the home you both created, he felt that he had finally received his sanctuary. A place where he sat, welcomed and unjudged for his sins.
"You're quite warm, мышка," he teased. "Perhaps you are developing fever. Hm?"
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𝗡𝗜𝗞𝗢𝗟𝗔𝗜 𝗚𝗢𝗚𝗢𝗟 ⋆⁺₊ ⸺⸺⸺
The pet names featured below are in Ukrainian.
𝗟𝗔𝗦𝗧𝗜𝗩𝗞𝗔 (ластівка)
The fluorescent lights above burned your eyes as you scoured the aisles of the store aimlessly. You were on your weekly grocery run but had decided to make something different for dinner this week. There was only one problem—you didn't know where the ingredients were. You normally would've just asked one of the staff members, but you had unfortunately come into the store at a very late hour. Every time you looked at an employee, their eyes were glazed over as if wishing for the sweet release of death. So you decided to search on your own.
You scanned the shelves for a particular dressing, not finding it in its usual spot. It was only with a quick glance to the top shelf that you found it, teetering on the edge as if tempting you. Gritting your teeth, you outstretched your arm as you braced your other one on a lower shelf, only to shriek at the feeling of two hands supporting your hips. You whipped around to find the pervert who had touched you but found nothing. And then you looked down.
Damn him.
Two familiar gloves emerged from golden portals, and a mischievous chuckle accompanied their exit from down the aisle. You looked the white-haired jester up and down, crossing your arms with a pout.
"Did you have to startle me like that?" "Ohhh, sorry, ластівка," he cooed. "I only want to say hello!~"
𝗠𝗔𝗟𝗘𝗡𝗞𝗔 𝗠𝗢𝗬𝗔 (маленька моя) ⋆ 𝗠𝗢𝗬𝗔 𝗞𝗢𝗞𝗛𝗔𝗡𝗔 (моя кохана)
How did you manage to get into this mess?
Oh yeah, Nikolai suggested it.
The classic jester, in his hobby of wreaking havoc everywhere he goes, suggested a fun date-night idea—to light bin fires around the alleys of Yokohama until the police caught on. At first, you had been chasing after him in an attempt to stop him, but it had all been in vain. He would let you grab him, only to chuckle as he teleported away with his cape. So instead, you opted to stick by his side and make sure he didn't cause too much harm.
You stood a couple of feet away from the blazing fire, your body resting in the tranquil glow of the chaotic light. Despite the oddities that came with the situation—and every situation that involved Nikolai—there was something so welcoming about the discord. Perhaps you had finally become used to Nikolai's antics. The aforementioned jester had been gaping at you for some time, an unreadable expression on his face as he watched your features through the fire.
"You look breathtaking in the glow of a flame, маленька моя."You stilled at his serious tone, fumbling over a response, but a crescendoing wail of sirens broke the silence. Nikolai smirked, grabbing your arm with one hand as the other went into his overcoat. "Oops!~ Looks like the police caught on. Come on, моя кохана! This way!"
𝗗𝗨𝗦𝗛𝗔 𝗠𝗢𝗬𝗔 (душа моя)
A refreshing breeze rushed past your face as you settled, watching the sun make its descent below the horizon of the city's harbor. Your legs dangled dangerously over the edge of a steep cliffside, yet you found no fear remaining in your heart. Perhaps you have become accustomed to a life of chaos; find beauty in the entropy and contradictions of life.
Nikolai couldn't help but stare at your face as it was outlined by the shadows of the dying sunbeams, awe-struck by your beauty. You were ethereal to him, everything he ever wanted to be and wished to have—so grounded and yet freer than ever. He knew that the relationship between you two, something neither of you had dared to label, should've made him feel constricted. It tied him down to the ground, and he should've been fighting for the skies.
But he didn't.
He felt free. And he knew that it was most likely his heart tricking him, stringing him to a relationship that would disappear with the wind—that he had truly become the fool everyone thought of him as. But he didn't care. Not anymore. Not with you by his side.
He snapped out of his philosophical contemplation as a soft hand cupped his cheek, thumbing at the performative mask that he wore. And he folded it like a deck of cards, removing it before placing a chaste kiss on your palm.
"Somehow, I feel freer than ever before. And it's all thanks to you, душа моя."
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𝗦𝗜𝗚𝗠𝗔 ⋆⁺₊ ⸺⸺⸺
𝗗𝗘𝗔𝗥 ⋆ 𝗗𝗘𝗔𝗥𝗘𝗦𝗧
It was a known fact that the Casino's manager had a rigid schedule, packed with meetings and event dates that he had to prepare for. Everything had to run perfectly inside his casino, and he would be damned if it didn't. However, Sigma always made it a mission to purposefully bump into you throughout the day. He had memorized your schedule easily, finding that there was only so much you could do in a finite building in the sky.
He would often find you either in the library or viewing deck, either in your own world reading a book or watching the real world from the skies. Even he had to admit that he could never get tired of the sight of the Earth from down below, contemplating the lives of those who lived on the ground.
"Good morning, dear," he greeted you at the entrance of the viewing deck, noticing a stack of books in your arms. "I see your trip to the library went well." "It was. I'm going to thumb through the newest shipment of fiction novels this afternoon," you replied, your hand already tapping on one of the hardcovers in anticipation. Sigma always made sure to buy the best books for the casino, and you knew he was often swayed by your own favorites. "I'm glad you're so interested in them." He knowingly smiled before a memory came to mind. "Could you hold off your reading for one moment, dearest? I've received a new layout for our casino's fliers and was hoping you'd take a look."
𝗟𝗢𝗩𝗘 ⋆ 𝗟𝗢𝗩𝗘𝗟𝗬 ⋆ 𝗦𝗪𝗘𝗘𝗧𝗛𝗘𝗔𝗥𝗧
The anxious casino manager often forgot to eat because of his destructive work habits, often going hours without consuming anything in order to constantly maintain peace in his casino. It was a terrible habit that caused more stress for both of you, so you decided to enact a plan. Whenever you noticed his workload was becoming too much or he seemed too frazzled, you'd step in to make sure he was getting everything he needed.
A small (underlying word: large) part of him secretly reveled in this, both having the opportunity to be doted on—and be simultaneously scolded—while also relishing in a couple stress-free moments with you. And he also gets to enjoy your cooking, which he personally found better than the casino chefs'—but that's because he was biased.
On his worst days, you'd prance into his office after the casino lunch rush, carrying in tow a small bento packed with his favorite comfort foods and a cookie for dessert. He would look up from whatever paperwork he was slaving away on, a small smile on his tired face.
"Thank you, my love." "You really need to eat more, Sigma," you lectured, placing the bento on his desk to take his face into your hands, analyzing his eye-bags with a concerned expression. "You're gonna get sick." "I'm fine, lovely," he replied, cupping your hands with his own. "You don't need to worry about me." You struck him with a pointed glare, crossing your arms and tapping your foot as he began to work on paperwork again. The clock ticked by a couple of seconds, your maternal scowl deepening with each moment that passed where he didn't reach for the food. "Sweetheart," he sighed before relenting and reaching for the bento. "Fine. For you, I'll eat some. But only until C4276 finishes his blackjack game."
𝗟𝗢𝗩𝗘 𝗢𝗙 𝗠𝗬 𝗟𝗜𝗙𝗘
The casino had been blasting with the sounds of the band in full swing long into the night, people dancing and chatting amongst themselves as the casino reached the peak of its ability. This new gala had been an exhilarating success, drawing in new patrons as cash flowed out from dealers' hands. It had been perfect, but it was obviously a lot on Sigma.
That was the reason you insisted on co-hosting it with him. He watched in amazement as you worked the crowd tonight, acting in concert to keep the patrons happy and to maintain order. You had been his perfect match, which showed just how much you watched over the casino.
He found you later that night standing on your private balcony, pausing at the entry to fully take in how beautiful you looked in your formal ensemble. The stars seemed to drift to your body like a satellite, casting you in a distant heavenly glow. But everything was silent as if you two were the only ones left to watch over the world as the clouds wandered by.
The anxiety and fear he always felt had been pushed to the side, melting away with the utter sense of belonging that you had engrained into him. You had shown him that he wasn't a mediocre man but a capable and strong individual capable of loving and being loved. You turned as the balcony door shifted open, welcoming him into both your arms and heart.
And he fell for you even more.
"Ohh, love of my life," he mumbled, nuzzled into your shoulder. "What would I be without you?"
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милая = dear/darling радная = dear любимая = beloved мышка = mouse ластівка = swallow (bird) маленька моя = my little one моя кохана = my love душа моя = my soul
ᴛᴀɢʟɪꜱᴛ: @imhandicapableofmath @seisitive @solandiss @ruru-kiss @sillyspookycat @kotysluny
© 𝐆𝐔𝐀𝐂𝐀𝐌𝐎𝐋𝐄𝐑𝐎𝐋𝐋 2023 — do not repost or modify my works for any reason. do not steal graphics w/o explicit permission. reblogs are appreciated.
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Edit: All chapters up on tmblr & ao3 :p
Okay, so I got alot of hits on my last FoP:ANW ficlet. Which had me re-reading it frequently. So instead of healing, I desperately wanted to fix this situation. I think I am genuinely affected that Timmy isn’t the MC anymore.
My child hood = 💀
Anyway, I made a continuation kinda. I’m much better at introspection than writing out actions (I think). So if this piece is not of the same quality as the last. Lemme know, I really wanna do this concept justice. :p
On a Wing and A Wish 🪽
 I wish Timmy Turner got back all the memories of his fairies and could be apart of his family forever.
    “What is this?” Dev asks, “Whose Timmy Turner?”
  Peri harshly shushes him, hovering in close while darting his eyes around Dev’s room.
    Begrudgingly, the kid whispers, “What’s the deal? No one is here. What. Is. This?”
  This - was a note looped with periwinkle ink on what was balled up paper. Peri couldn’t believe what he was doing. Sneaking behind his parents’, and worse, the Fairy Council’s back, asking his own god-kid for a wish. He never thought to go through with it, even if he did frequently imagine the outcome. But it was the one thing he’d wanted since his brother left.
  No. Not left. He forgot. They made him forget. He never left us.
  Never left me.
  He sighs, resuming the usual distance. Dev can finally breathe in air that’s not Peri’s cologne and takes in his god-parent’s appearance. The fairy did not look good. Usually quaffed hair was flat and tussled, like he forgot to shower then tossed and turned all night. Which, ew, he probably hadn’t showered or poofed himself clean or whatever fairies do based on the pit stains. Sweat was also causing clammy hands that were attempting to wring themselves dry. His usual calming, lavender eyes were bloodshot from what he could tell. Well, when they weren’t searching for a haunted house jump scare.
    Dev waves his arms, “Hello? Earth to Peri!”
  The beat of wings is audible as Peri jumps a foot higher in the air.
    “Are you broken? Can fairies malfunction?” Dev gets a dimmadome idea, “Do I get a new one if you do?”
  This absurd question has Peri descending from the (literal) high level of anxiety to a level of annoyance. That level being eye to eye with his god-kid, where purple and blue begin a standoff. If there was a movie in the pinpricks of their eyes, it would reflect a tense western gun fight. Peri would have a wand at his holster and Dev would be there, arms crossed and smug as can be. His mouth loaded with the bullet 'I wish…' and Peri would be dead on the dusty road.
  A wing and a prayer is the saying. He had wings, he just needed the prayer.
  Or a wish.
  Peri surrenders, realizing picking a fight will not work in his favor.
    “Fairies can’t grant their own wishes.”
     The ginger scoffs, “That’s it?” He thought his fairy was dense, but he didn’t realize Peri was actually challenged. “Just, have another fairy grant your wish.”
  Rather than meeting with some Peri-fonted, copy-paste of Da Rules, Dev saw as his god-parent open and close his mouth. Pale lips pressing in a thin line. His small body seemed to curl in on itself, shielding not from Dev, but the irony of what he had said.
     Without looking at him, Peri said, “They can’t. It’s not how it works. Only a god-kid can make wishes.”
  The hitch and crack at the word 'can’t' did not go unnoticed by either. Peri flinches. He had spent all week wrestling with the notion. It was only last night that he had scribbled the note down. There was nothing in Da Rules about another kid wishing for someone to not lose their memories. His mom was right, there are a lot of loopholes.
   Peri had hoped and hyped himself up enough that being a godparent would fix him. If he could recreate it, he wouldn’t feel the dreams of his childhood each night turn to mourning. Deep nostalgia for a time that seemed imagined rather than the most impressionable years of his immortal life. Hijinks among his and his parents’ god-kids flooded him with memories. Waves of jealously crashed down as Dev and Hazel shared their youth, times they’ll have forever.
  Peri could not live eternity drowning.
  The human boy felt awkward, it never occurred when he wasn’t the most grieved one in the room. Dev knew, though not consciously, that grief was not just losing someone. It was being lost yourself. Each day happened, it was not unnoticed, but it wasn’t remembered.
    “Well….what would I even be wishing for? I was taught not to sign something before reading it, err wishing.”
 Peri’s wings flutter briefly. Was Dev considering it? What was he supposed to say? He gathers himself as much as he can to stop shaking from nerves.
    “Timmy Turner is someone really important to me. Like, he’s kinda the whole reason I exist.” He pauses, waiting for Dev’s reaction.
    “I thought the green fairy was your dad?”
    “No, not like that. Although, I guess he did wish for my dad to get pregnant.”
    “Your dad was WHAT?” Dev shouts but Peri is quickly on him again, hand pressed tight over the kid’s mouth. Dev only briefly struggles to push him off, dramatically gasping for breath.
    “It’s complicated okay? I just, it would mean everything to me, to my parents, if you could wish this.” Peri interjects before Dev can close curtain on his overreaction.
     Cutting a glare that isn’t so much as throwing the knife but threatening to, Dev straightens himself. “What’s in it for me?”
  Whatever miserable feelings Peri has disappear into steam when he reddens from frustration at the kid’s incredulousness.
     "'In it for you?!' You literally have anything you have ever wanted at your finger tips. You have ME! A fairy! With an endless amount of wishes. There is nothing I can’t give you if you want it!” Peri hisses. He might pass out, all the breath pushed from his lungs at this nightmare of a child. He takes a deep breath.
    “It’s a favor. I’m asking a favor Dev.”
  The kid did feel a little stupid saying that. It was such a habit. He’s never been in a situation that wasn’t an exchange. It’s not like Peri was going to stop granting him wishes if he said no. And besides being less annoying, there was nothing more the fairy could do if he said yes.
  Dev sighs, he knows he’s going to make the wish.
    “Do you know why kids get godparents to begin with?” Peri’s tone is drained of any animosity. It sounds hollow, like an echo instead of the real words.
  He isn’t sure if Peri is looking for an answer, but Dev is still feeling sheepish after his own selfishness.
     “No...”
  Fairy eyes are known to have a slight shimmer in their iris’, as if they held infinitesimal pieces of glitter. Dev hopes that it’s just the light magnifying the effect in Peri’s and not him on the verge of tears.
     “Because life isn’t fair. When life isn’t fair, kids get fairies. The fairies stay until life gets better or they grow up. But,” he falters then, a strained attempt at composure, “but they always forget.”
  He flutters down onto the side of Dev’s bed. Wings mirroring his melancholy as they droop. This is not a reserved sadness, it’s not something you can leave till nightfall, not anymore. Not now that he has to face it every day, worse that’s of his own volition. It’s a lonely feeling that twists and winds itself so tight he can’t stand it. Something had to be done.
      “I just can’t forget.” And there is a tear now, one he hopes his god-kid cant see with his head bowed.
  Hesitantly, Dev sits down. It’s rare for them to be on an even level when he’s not hovering. Peri is so small compared to the 10 year old, who feels like moving an inch might shatter his fairy.
      “Was he your first god-kid? Is that how, fairies like, reproduce or something? You run out of fairies for kids and when you need more you just…..your dad?” Dev can’t decide between disgust, curiosity, or confusion.
  Peri chuckles, plugging any leaks he has with a sniffle. He guesses he’ll get a few awkward questions on that later.
    “Eh, no. We grew up together. He’s kinda like - he’s my brother.” The statement is the only solid thing he can cling to. That one simple fact.
  He’s my brother.
    “I know it doesn’t make any sense, and it’s a lot to go over. But I promise if you do this for me, I will explain everything. Anything you want to know.”
  There is another thing that makes Dev feel like an idiot, and that’s his dad. Anytime there might be a sliver of a chance for him to pay attention or choose Dev over some money scheme, Dev falls for it every-time. A swell of hope and admiration fills his chest and then he’s getting the breath knocked out of him when, surprise, he’s never his dad’s choice. Peri was right about life not being fair. And it doesn’t just seem unfair for humans. But, if he got a fairy to even it out for him, maybe he could try too.
  Besides, he was going to-do it anyway.
    “Hey Peri?”
  He rubs his eyes with his sleeve for good measure and gives a mosaic smile of all the shattered hurt inside.
    “Yeah kid?” 
  Dev takes a breath.
    “I wish- “
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nymphaliia · 6 months
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𐙚 TOKYO REVENGERS SMUT
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୨୧ sanzu x police officer!reader
— you need to arrest sanzu, but you're alone and he thinks you'd be so much prettier beneath him, so he takes it upon himself to remind you of your place.
cw : noncon, gun play (not really), threats, public sex, blowjob, cum swallow, humiliation, slight spitting
my masterlist : ˚ʚ♡ɞ˚
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your job was tough. you knew that when you signed up so you didn't have any right to complain. but there were nights like this which were radically harder than others.
you were patrolling on your assigned neighborhood on your own. it wouldn't be effective to have you there without any help, but your police station was running short of workforce so it left you with no choice.
and you regretted deeply to have come here tonight when your boss had suggested you join another group in a less secluded area. but, you wanted to assure the safety of the inhabitants, as you've been warned repeatedly of the growing activity of various gangs here.
regardless, when you think about it, it was careless and stupid of you to think you could've managed any issues alone if one had to happen.
this overconfident thought process of yours is what led you to your current situation, a gun pointed at your head. your gun.
"what's wrong, weren't you about to arrest me?", you tried to think cleverly, hands raised in a surrender motion in hopes he wouldn't shoot just for fun.
"listen, I'm only doing my job. you need to surrender yourself to the police, my colleagues have been notified, they'll be there soon. it's in your interest to stop protesting" the man seemed insanely high, pupils dilated all the way and an eccentric speech you often found with drug addicts.
you had to gain time and act extra careful with him. the way he handled your gun showed you he wasn't a novice and knew what he was doing. shooting you would have been the least exciting highlight of his day.
"you talk a lot for a little bitch like you. your mouth doesn't need all those big words" you watched as he glared at you, getting annoyed at your 'bratty' act and thinking of a way to entertain himself.
"you're quite reckless even though I'm holding you at gunpoint" he stated lazily. you eyed him carefully, choosing not to say anything for fear of upsetting him further.
"do you value your life ? because I'm thinking of a few ways you could try and save your life" he laughed lightly, a playful expression finally making his way to his face.
you gulped as you watched him start to caress his member through his pants and you noticed with dread that the man was hard. a little wet spot had appeared and you could only pray he wouldn't make you do what you thought he would.
but of course, he was the one in charge. you had been dumb enough to let this drug addict stole it from you and now you were paying the price. you judged your options, not knowing what he would do to you and how far he was able to take it. you prepared yourself for any demand.
"get on your knees and show me how much you want to live. or would you like to test how long it'll take for your other friends to get there?", he agitated the gun in front of your head, clearly indicating what was about to become of you if you tried to play it smart.
you could resist, but he seemed way too determined at making you obey. you knew he'd force you physically if you didn't follow his words.
you shuddered at the thought of your coworkers stumbling upon you, watching with disgust and horror their sweetest colleague in such a shameful position.
so you went along, swallowing your pride and slowly sinking to your knees. you felt humiliated and wronged, knowing you'll get no mercy from the man in front of you. you were either gonna suck him off or die on the spot. your choice was done.
you grew more anxious as you watched him unzip his pants, taking his hard dick out and presenting it to you. the tip fell on your lips and you had a recoil, lucidity preventing you from remaining emotionless.
"come on princess, work for your life", he was mocking you and you had no choice but to stay silent, slowly parting your lips when he forced his dick inside.
watching you glaring up at him with a face cutely deformed by his length made him laugh at you, condescending eyes looking down at you.
"aah yes, you're definitely prettier when you shut the fuck up. acting all big and mighty just doesn't suit an airhead like you baby"
you wanted to cuss him out, regretting how stupid you had been for complying to his words in exchange for your life. at least you would've died properly during your shift like any proper cop.
but here you were, on your knees for the criminal you were supposed to arrest. you were such a failure, if your police station learned about that, you could bet your life was over for real this time.
"you better hurry up and make me cum, wouldn't want them to find out their colleague is just a dumb slut who opens her mouth wide for any criminal to cum into, right?" he presses the gun deeper into your forehead, eyes questioning if you have any fighting spirit left in you with a raised brow. he smirks when he finally feels you start to move, your movements are clumsy but it draws a few loud moans from him, obviously not caring at all about the possible passers-by.
"fuck, getting your dick sucked by a cute little cop is the best. you're doing great baby, taking it like a champ'", he mocks, tangling his hand in your head and watching you gag as he pushes you deeper and deeper on his cock. your choke are stimulating him and he finds no sympathy in himself to give you a moment to breathe.
you turn light-headed, slapping his thighs in an attempt to ask him for oxygen and he just laughs.
"poor princess, do you need someth- aah almost there, that's right keep sucking me like that" he swiftly puts your gun in his back pocket to allow him to use your head easier. that's how harmless you seem to him, he doesn't even need a gun to make you submit and it hurts your pride even more.
he now grabs two handful of your hair, scalp burning in his hands, before he slides you along his shaft quicker.
he throws his head back, enjoying the unholy sounds you make along with the sweet pleasure your abused throat offers him.
you find little relief in knowing you're alone there. at least your reputation won't be too dirtied... but of course, it wouldn't be funny if that's how things went?
"y/n ?! where are you, we've received your localisation" you freeze. you recognise that voice as your colleague, a nice guy with whom you spend most of your shift with. expect for tonight.
you look up at the man above you, fearing the glint of malice in his eyes.
"they came to look for you, how sweet. do you want me to call them over to tell them you're alright baby?" he roughly removes you from his dick, allowing you to pant for air. you would've crumbled at his feet if not for the way his hand was solidly attached to your hair. it hurt and you were scared to be discovered.
you hurriedly pleaded him with multiple shakes of your head, eyes wide and looking up at him with dread.
sanzu felt like he had won, smiling satisfyingly upon witnessing how undone you looked. just a bit of manhandling, threats and having your mouth fucked was enough to turn you into a submissive cum slut? what a treat.
he was glad he decided to go pay a visit to one of his client tonight.
"damn, her car is here but she's nowhere to be found. hope she's alright, there's a lot of gang stuff going on in this place" you listen as the voices come and go, internally praying for them to leave as soon as possible and search for you somewhere else.
you were too lost in your fear that you let out a loud chocking sound when he shoved his dick again in your warm mouth, growing tired of listening to the shouting of your name. and he stayed there again, unmoving, wearing your mouth like a socket.
you tried to throw a look behind you. you could hear them but couldn't see anything as he had your back turned on the road. even though you were hidden in a dark alley, you knew sanzu could see them clearly and you could only hate the way his smile widened at your distress.
"hey be careful, you don't want them to find you if your being too loud, do you?" and with that he started pounding into your head again.
he enjoyed the way your face looked a mess, with saliva dripping down your chin and chest, knees bruised at how long you've been on the ground and how your mascara was dirtying your cheeks. it felt so good to corrupt a cute little cop like you.
he felt your throat tightening upon hearing footsteps getting closer. he knew you were scared but it only pushed him to wreck you even more.
"oh- yes that's the spot. if you keep doing that I might just nut on the spot, are you sure you're doing the right job? might as well just become a whore..."
and he finally felt it, happy to do it in your pretty mouth.
he gripped your hair tighter, coming in your mouth with low grunts. you chocked around him, helping him finish quicker. you felt the warm liquid spurting inside and you had no choice but to swallow as he wouldn't let you go until he was sure you had tasted him fully.
"fuck, that felt so good princess. I love coming into an obedient slut's mouth, always the best" he patted the top of your hair dreamily, his lips stretched into a content smile while he kept his dick inside your mouth, waiting for the high to dissolve a little.
when he finally released you, he let his dick go in a pop, letting it rest on top of your panting head, the saliva and rest of cum coating his shaft fell on your head in drops but you were too exhausted and defeated to do anything.
sanzu felt satisfied with how things turned out today and chose to leave without any regrets. he promised himself he would pay you a little visit too when he felt like it and he jokingly kissed your cheek, thanking you for your hard work.
he cleaned his member by smearing it on your face before putting it back in his pants. he threw your gun back right in front of you "I think that's yours, you can keep it baby" and with a final spit on your face, which you received with no resistance, he finally left, unapologetic and a ting of mockery in his tone "I'm sure you'll be able to keep that secret between the two of us, right princess?"
what an asshole.
you took a moment to gather yourself, messily clearing your face up with your shirt, trying your best to look presentable.
you felt ashamed of yourself for having helped this asshole to cum. you spat all you could to try and get rid of the foul taste but to no avail.
you were at least glad he wasn't here to witness your little reunion with the people you worked with for years. you know he would've laughed at you.
you dusted your knees as you stood up, stumbling on your feet which had grown weak during the past minutes. you tried to think of a good excuse to justify your lack of response and finally made yourself known to your coworkers.
"y/n, here you are! we thought something bad happened to you- wait are you okay, you look really... tired?"
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sister-2-sleep · 10 months
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The Last Time (almost) Every MCR Song Was Played
I saw someone do this for tbp so I'm doing it for all the songs
Bullets
Romance: May 12, 2006
Honey : October 24, 2010
Vampires : March 26, 2023
Drowning lessons : October 17, 2004
Our lady of sorrows : March 25, 2023
Halos : October 11, 2022
Skylines and turnstiles: March 17, 2023
Monroeville : October 29, 2005
Best day ever : October 11, 2022
Cubicles : Never played live (from what i can find)
Demolition Lovers : October 11, 2022
Three cheers
Helena : March 26, 2023
Give em hell kid : March 26, 2023
To the end : May 12, 2006
Prison : March 26, 2023
I'm not ok: March 26, 2023
Ghost of you: March 26, 2023
Jetset life: May 4, 2008
Interlude: May 4, 2008
Venom: March 26, 2023
Hang em high: October 12, 2022
Fashion statement : March 26, 2023
Cemetery drive: March 14, 2023
Ntywidfal: October 12, 2022
Black parade
The end: October 7, 2007
Dead: August 27, 2011
How I disappear: March 26, 2023
Sharpest lives: May 9, 2008
Wttbp: March 26, 2023
I don't love you: October 17, 2022
House of wolves: March 20, 2023
Cancer: March 19, 2023
Mama: March 26, 2023
Sleep: March 26, 2023
Teenagers: March 26, 2023
Disenchanted: October 7, 2007
Last words: March 26, 2023
Blood: Never (only ever audio recordings)
Danger Days
Na na na: March 26, 2023
Bulletproof heart : September 8, 2022
Sing: October 17, 2022
Planetary: March 25, 2023
Only hope: October 15, 2022
Party poison: April 23, 2011
Save yourself: October 15, 2022
S/C/A/R/E/C/R/O/W: October 15, 2022
Summertime : March 20, 2023
Destroya: March 25, 2023
Kids from yesterday: March 25, 2023
Vampire money: March 19, 2023
Conventional Weapons
Boy division : March 26, 2023
Tomorrows money: August 30, 2022
Ambulance : Never been played
Gun: Never been played
World is ugly: March 26, 2023
Light behind your eyes: Never been played
Kiss the ring: August 8, 2009
Make room: September 24, 2022
Surrender the night: September 15, 2022
Burn bright: September 10, 2022
Mad Gear and Missile Kid
F.T.W.W.W. : Never been played
Ravenkroft: October 15, 2022
Black dragon: Never been played
Other
Foundations: March 26, 2023
Sister to sleep: October 17, 2022
all the angels : October 14, 2022
Heavan help us : October 17, 2022
Kill all your friends: March 25, 2023
My way home: May 9, 2008
Eagles : March 26, 2023
Fake your death: October 17, 2022
Desert song: October 12, 2022
Bury me in black: March 26, 2023
Desolation row: October 11, 2022 at
Song 2 (blur cover) : June 18, 2007
Under pressure (queen cover) : March 29, 2005
We will rock you (queen cover) : August 26, 2011
If I missed any lmk lol. And I will update this after WWWY next year.
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topoeiaz · 2 months
Text
Decrescendo (CoD) John Price x OC
18+ blog • minors dni
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content: fluff, hurt/comfort, smut
warning: military inaccuracies, human trafficking, implied sexual trauma
word count: 30.2k
summary: Her personal mission of infiltrating a human-trafficking ring had been a success and an opportunity to escape the leader presented itself when her colleagues raided their base. As she readjusted to her normal life, flames are kindled and tears are shed. She had found her way back home in the people she held dear and she awaits the day her sister would come home too.
a/n: so. I got lured into the cod fandom through good smut writing. fr truly changed the smut scene for me ngl. also, despite the title, there's nothing musical in this lol. and I realised while proofreading that the romance isn't as focussed on as I thought it was, woops. happy reading!!
cod masterlist • ao3
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It was a noisy night.
The assignment was straightforward; infiltrate the target organisation’s base, preferably capture the human-trafficking ringleader alive, and hack into their system to download their records. Nothing new, nothing surprising. So why was it, the boys wondered, that they had found themselves struck confused at the scene before them?
The mission flowed seamlessly, there was nothing of note as they took down the two-story hideout’s members guarding the boss in his office. They had lost a couple of their own – as inevitable as it was upsetting – but they had eventually managed to reach their destination at the top floor. Eyeing the team to gauge their preparedness to tackle the final room, Captain John Price gave a solid nod after his orders before he slammed the locked doorknob open. Immediately bullets came barrelling through the wood, as expected, and the boys waited for a moment of pause before rushing into the room and assuming positions to cut the corners and aim at those who had a gun pointed to them, save for the man in the back, middle of the room, in front of the of the office table.
A feminine voice shrieked fearfully as the organisation’s men collapsed one by one. Veterans in their skills, none of Price’s men had taken a fatal shot by the time the battle died down. That ended up with the ringleader coming into a faceoff with the British S.A.S. men, the rest of the Price’s team settling themselves outside the room to watch for any stray attacks. It was only then, that the boys had noticed the woman in the room, stood behind their target who had an arm out in front of her protectively as his other hand held a gun trained onto Price. Intel had told them that the leader had a woman, but they had also been briefed that he would be in a meeting during their attack. They had not expected for the unnamed lady to grace them with her presence that evening.
“Claudio Agustine. You’re outnumbered, I suggest you surrender this instance.”
Agustine scoffed with a manic grin etched onto his lips. “You’ve come here for my records, no? Unfortunately for you, I’ve reset the computers in this building so you can’t access the data here.”
The boys cursed under their breaths when they realised that they really do have to capture Agustine alive now so that they didn’t end this assignment empty-handed and for naught. One of them, Johnny “Soap” MacTavish, spoke into his radio to update the team on their situation and, understandably, received the new order to keep Agustine alive.
At Soap’s callout to Kate Laswell’s alias, the tearful woman cowering behind Agustine perked up her ears. The flag patched onto the unexpected attackers’ uniform and their overall familiar design had kindled hope in her at first glance, but now with the confirmation that the men operated under Laswell’s command, she was confident that she had been blessed by the Grace. Her thoughts remained locked in her though, and she easily let none of it slip past her frightened expression and trembling figure. Now, to find an opening to take her chance…
Thinking that he was in the superior standing to propose an exchange, Agustine continued, “you take me in, that I cannot escape, but you must also take Tara.” Tara, the woman whom he loves, made a sound of surprised confusion in the back of her throat, one that she did not have to fake, as she snapped her head up to look at her ‘protector’. “You treat her well – the best she deserves – and let me keep her beside me at all times.”
Ah, Tara realised, he really was head over heels for her – and selfish, of course. Once again, her disdain for the man went unknown as she batted her eyelash up at him like a lovesick fool. “Oh, Claude! How could I ever stay away from you even in these circumstances!”
Baffled at her breathless tone as she sobbed pathetically at the idea of parting with her lover, the men unanimously thought of her to be a bimbo, unknowingly playing into her success.
Price corresponded with Laswell this time, giving a slight instinctual nod at her response despite her inability to see it. “Alright, Agustine. You get your wish. Drop your weapons and hands up where I can see ‘em.”
Agustine, always a difficult person to work with due to his own faults, opted not to let go of his gun but instead, clicked the safety on and aimed it at the ceiling with his hand up in a ‘white-flag’ hold. His other hand went up to caress Tara’s cheek lovingly, his eyes gleaming with adoration – and specks of apprehension at his situation – as he gazed upon her eyes.
“Oh, sweetheart. I promise that everything will be just fine, yeah?”
He had loosened his grip on the gun; now was her chance. Just as the men took a step forward to begin apprehending Agustine, Tara moved. Speed unmatched and unexpected to everyone, her movements were a blur. One moment, the couple seemed like they were sinking down the Titanic together, helpless but in love, and the next, Tara had flipped Agustine onto the floor, body facing up, and she had his gun trained onto his head as she stood above him. Her face went blank, an expression she had befriended in the darkness of the nights for the past half a year; gone were the affections she had been faking for the man under her, who had his hands around his neck where she had struck earlier as he wheezed.
Hence, the stupefied looks on the boys’ face at the turn of events that the mission had taken.
“Swe- et- hea-” a sharp gasp, “-rt?”
Tara’s eyes narrowed. She flicked off the safety switch in the gun she held – hers, for now – and trailed its aim onto the floor beside his head before pulling the trigger and returning her aim onto him. The sudden single sound was blaring enough to cut off Agustine’s wheezes for a quick moment, disbelief clear in his eyes as he stilled in place.
“Call me that again and the next one goes into your eye.”
Managing to snap out into clarity for a moment, Price started, “we need him alive, lo- uh… Tara.”
Her eyes didn’t leave their sights on her ‘lover’ and a sardonic grin made its way to her lips. “Fret not, sir. I’ll make sure not to hit his brain.”
Understanding was beginning to cross Agustine’s features and Tara was undeterred by the hurt and anger flickering in his expression.
Remembering his concealed knife, Tara’s eyes flickered to his right hip and in a split moment, shot at where it was attached to his strap with easy precision. Ignoring his cries, she brought a foot out to kick away the sheath and its dagger towards the group of men who were still watching with a total loss of grip at the situation.
When Agustine went to clutch at his hip, Tara feigned sympathy and crooned at him. “Aww, did I somehow graze you, darling? Are you in pain?” Venom dripped from her mocking tone and Agustine gulped – with immense difficulty – at the unbridled disdain she now let loose in her façade. She huffed when she received no response and turned to the military men instead.
One of them, the big guy on the left sporting a skull mask, had his gun targeted on her and she silently respected his suspicion of her. Price stood slightly in front of the rest of the squad and so, she decided to address him. “Sergeant Levina Riven, previously under the direct orders of Captain Joshua Mavers. Likely presumed dead following my failed evac on the assignment to infiltrate Agustine’s West Manford base early this February.”
Their doubts were obviously etched onto their skins. Price relayed Tara’s – Levina’s – claimed identity to Laswell, along with his description of her appearance.
“Sounds like her. I’ll have Mavers confirm her identity when she’s here. Stay vigilant.”
The boys narrowed their eyes in suspicion to which she only responded with an innocent tilt of her head. Her gun remained unmoving as she kept Agustine in her peripherals.
“Right. We’ll have to keep you in custody until we get back to HQ. Same thing, drop your weapon and hands up.”
Levina frowned for a moment as she turned back to Agustine, who was now fuming at her deception, before clicking on the safety and tossing her gun towards the men. Now, not being held at gunpoint and under a false sense of security at the thought that he could overpower the woman, Agustine raised his torso and reached for Levina’s nearest leg. However quick his actions were, her senses were sharper and she clocked his incoming attack before he could touch her. She brought a leg up and slammed it down onto his thighs mercilessly, her stiletto heels digging into the flesh down to its hilt as blood splattered out. Agustine let out a pained scream, again when she lifted her foot up to expose his wound, and tears escaped him uncontrollably as he tentatively clutched at his leg.
Unwavering, Levina only clicked her tongue at the ruined state of her heels before giving the astounded men her full attention. She obediently offered her hands out towards them with a saccharine smile playing on her lips. “You’re free to arrest me now.”
In the discord of sobs and curses, bathed in the calm haze of the moon, Levina’s eyes gleamed devilishly.
The men wasted no time in apprehending both their targets after that. Upon the failure of salvaging anything from the computers in the building, the group made it back to the outskirts of the base where they were then picked up by their ride.
Levina spent the entire ride with her eyes locked onto the floor, deep in thought, as she tuned out Agustine’s whimpers – the medic had patched him up during the flight – and the whirring of the helicopter. No one had tried engaging her in a conversation, much to her relief, and exhaustion carried through the air.
The sun was peeking over in the horizon as they began to land. Soon enough, everyone was making their way out of the vehicle to greet the rest of the team holding the fort down. Levina stayed amongst the back of the group and watched as Laswell said something to Agustine before ordering her men to take him to his cell. She caught Laswell’s eyes when the latter skimmed her gaze over the team and she was ordered to come forward. Laswell hummed in acknowledgement when she stated her name and rank before looking off to the side to beckon Mavers forward. His eyes took Levina in with heightened suspicion, trailing over her features, before he nodded resolutely in confirmation.
“Sergeant Riven!” The aforementioned woman straightened up further. “Welcome back.”
“Thank you, Captain.”
The apprehension in Laswell only cleared up slightly as she regarded her returned subordinate. She then called for the higher-ups to join her for a debrief, which Levina was to follow along, and dismissed the others before leading the way to her office.
Once again, Laswell called Levina forward while the others settled themselves around the room.
“State your reason as to your role in Agustine’s ranks.”
Levina’s hands were still tied behind her as a precaution so she couldn’t give her salute and started explaining immediately. “Ma’am. My team had been tasked with the assignment to infiltrate Agustine’s base in West Manford early this February. We managed to retrieve only half the data when Agustine’s backup arrived. I was separated from my team during the evac following their ambush in the woods and managed to escape to the riverside with my radio busted. I came across a town after a few days and stayed there under the generosity of an old lady who had come across me. The town had little to no technology so there was no way of establishing comms with HQ.
“I met Agustine in the pub there one night and made the impulsive decision to settle for a long-con and flirt my way into his ranks to gain intel on his organisation. By the third month, I was allowed into his most confidential of meetings and I now have the locations of his operations, the identity of the big-name buyers, and the partners of his association to my knowledge. It was only recently that I began planning an escape but it seemed that I have been beaten to it with the arrival of your team.”
An eyebrow raised in respect for Levina’s efforts, Laswell nodded approvingly. “We’ll get someone to curate your intel in a moment. Meanwhile, it is odd that you have chosen to work alone just to take down Agustine. Why made you decide to avenge your loss?”
Hesitance shone in Levina with the way she kept silent for a moment. Knowing there was no way out of answering her superior, however, she eventually cleared the air.
“Sergeant Richard Shane had recognised the victims in the records as missing persons during the initial assignment. He was scrolling down the list of the victim’s pictures when I came across…” her breath caught in her throat as her memory of that moment before they got ambushed flickered in her mind, “my sister.”
Laswell’s eyes softened with sympathy and Levina didn’t have to look around to know that the others were looking at her similarly.
“My deepest condolences. We have started tracking down the buyers whose identities were included in the victim’s records but we have not come across another ‘Riven’ amongst the ones that we have managed to obtain.” Laswell offered her a reassuring smile, “rest assured, Sergeant. With the intel you will provide, we will track her down eventually.”
Levina willed her voice to not crack as she replied, “yes, Ma’am.”
Laswell had Price release the rope tying her hands together and she flexed them to get the blood rushing once again.
She stayed even as Laswell then began to debrief the current assignment, staying silent as she listened. Once they had been dismissed, Laswell led her to a transcriber who would take note of her 4 months’ worth of knowledge of Agustine’s meetings. The task ended up taking hours and before she knew it, she had missed breakfast. Coming to save her grumbling stomach, however, came in the form of Sergeant Ardour Crawley, her previous – was she still to be under Captain Mavers’ command? – teammate.
Word had spread of the return of a presumed killed-in-action colleague that morning and Mavers had confirmed Levina’s presence earlier. Crawley had noticed her absence in the canteen though and took it upon himself to save a sandwich for the woman. They ended up sitting on a bench overlooking the men in training as Crawley caught her up on the past over half a year’s updates and gossips while she munched on her food.
“… and that group of four became known as the team that were called upon whenever the military wanted to get. Shit. Done.” Crawley punctuated for dramatic emphasis which earned a hum of understanding from Levina. “I’m glad they were the ones who ended up rescuing you, they’re a capable lot after all.”
In his Grace, he didn’t confront her on her lack of words and wandering gaze. He was used to her noncommittal hums which told him that her attention was still on him, but he did get concerned when her only response thus far had been an “oh…” when he had told her of the demise of the rest of her original team over the past months – a few had died in that same assignment in West Manford while the rest met their ends in other missions.
To his dismay, Crawley had to leave soon enough to return to his duties. His worry placated slightly when Levina shot him a reassuring smile, but her sudden expressiveness had also brought upon more concern for her well-being. So, with a final sad smile – he would’ve patted her back if not for the way she had flinched when he hugged her in greeting earlier – he left her to her thoughts.
Levina had a few hours to spend before she had to meet with Laswell again after lunch. “To talk about your next steps,” the Station Chief had said, “I’ll let you think through it until then.”
Prior to her unexpected rescue from Agustine, Levina had only started to think about her  preliminary strategies as to how to escape Agustine’s clutches and relate her intel back to the military. She had not thought further onto what she would do if she managed to make it back to HQ. Now that she was here, in all her glory of trauma and weariness, she could only think of resting her psyche after seven months of acting like a bimbo; to go home and reassure her father of her ‘alive’ status, despite the news of her death that had arrived in a phone call all those months ago.
She didn’t doubt Laswell’s humanity – surely she’ll be willing to give her at least a few days off? In the off-chance that she wouldn’t be granted time off, however, Levina had no qualms in retraining into a skilful S.A.S. soldier as that was what she was good at. So, perhaps the question isn’t about what she would do now that she was safely away from Agustine; instead, she had to ask herself: will she ever feel back to herself again?
Somewhere during the seven months of operating as a different person, she had lost a part herself. The mental exhaustion that came with keeping up her pretence as an incapable-of-thought woman, whose personality was only being pretty, meant the occasional thought in her mind to revert back to that state of being. Moreover, she was tired of putting up animated expressions that had once charmed Agustine, and now it took a lot of effort to even put on an expression that was something other than ‘blank’. Long, had she numbed herself to listening to the heartless chatter of Agustine’s men as they talked about their business. She feared losing herself to the extent that she grew to stop caring – she felt palliated to know that her fear at least told her of the remaining humanity still left in her.
Then, there was also physical affection. Agustine had been a physical man; after all, it took only a couple of weeks before she became a regular in his bed.
When she first made up her mind to conduct the long-con against Agustine, one of the things that fought against the decision had been the idea of becoming a prostitute for the disgusting man. One factor had been the fact that she had been a virgin prior to Agustine, and that she had wanted to save it for a more respectable man – a hopeless romantic she had been, perhaps even now in the depths of her heart. There had never been someone in her life who she got to call her lover. As a result, all the romantic affections she had ever received would forever be associated with that sorry excuse of a man, at least until the next time she found someone she decided was worthy to love her. She wasn’t an active pursuer of love, though – despite her dream to fall in love one day – so it was uncertain just how long it would be until she could escape associating romantic and physical affections with Agustine. That is, if there was even someone out there who would want her, broken and lost as she feels.
Levina was snapped out of her thoughts when she felt a presence in the space next to her, on the bench. She turned to the figure and regarded the stranger with a questioning gaze – it seemed that for the meantime, as her expressions worked on themselves to start showing up again, her emotions have settled on communicating with her eyes – his face familiar amongst the men that had a showdown with Agustine earlier.
“Sergeant Kyle Garrick, or more commonly, ‘Gaz’.” Gaz extended a hand out and Levina offered her hand only after a beat of tentative silence.
Still mindful of her manners, she managed to speak in a quiet voice. “Sergeant Levina Riven.”
The reflection of her empty shell was a huge contrast to the adrenaline-filled woman Gaz had met earlier, but he only kept that thought in himself as sympathy washed over him. He had seen his fair share of soldiers with trauma, and he only dreaded to think what Levina had to go through to stay by Agustine’s side under an act.
Kind soul that he is, he offered an unopened bottle of water to her. “One of the hotter Autumn days, the forecast said. You’ve been out here for a while and I don’t see any sources of hydration around you.”
In the same low voice, she muttered a “thank you” and took the bottle, untwisting the cap before taking only a small sip of it despite the intense heat that she had not even registered. Gaz knew better than to force her to drink more, a small win is a win, nonetheless. He, too, had been watching the group of soldiers’ training from another angle, sleep escaping him despite having only returned from an assignment, and he had grown perturbed when he had noticed Levina’s unmoving form for the past hour or so. Thus, there he was, after battling with himself to decide whether to leave the woman alone or to come up and attempt befriending her.
And befriend her, he will, for he had decided to do so.
“Say, Riven,” a questioning hum came from the girl, “if the British Army were to engage in a battle with twenty thousand emus, who do you think would win?”
A pause.
Levina turned away from her stare into the air to lock eyes with Gaz, only to be met with utter seriousness in his face. She stared wordlessly for a moment, uncertainty ringing in her head at the topic of conversation, before facing forward once again with a simple mutter of “emu” leaving her lips.
“What?!” Incredulous at her opinion, genuine disbelief crossed his expression. “Surely we’ve learnt from the Australia’s Emu War! There’s no way they’d win again.”
She gave a shrug. “Who’s to say they didn’t learn from the war too?”
Gaz prided himself in managing to get Levina to speak out an entire sentence, at the expense of learning of her opposing opinion in their – almost meaningless – debate.
“Okay, that’s fair, didn’t think that way. But they don’t even have hands!”
Another shrug, “fast legs.”
Cue their light-hearted discourse over the feasibility of winning over emus in a hypothetical war setting. Levina mostly responded with short quips, a shrug, or a hum, which didn’t discourage Gaz at all, remaining as patient as ever as he led the conversation. The topic somehow switched from emus to other animals, to the comparison of a gun against a sword as a more reliable weapon, to the flaws of human evolution that has led to the current state of the world.
Needless to say, they were quick to arrive at that stage of their friendship where the questions got too real and they began considering the likelihood of human extinction within the next couple of generations.
Levina appreciated the breath of fresh air that Gaz had brought with him. For so long now, her only person of correspondence was Agustine and Agustine alone, that meant that she had forgotten what it was like to chat nonsense with someone. Keeping up with the conversation also meant less room for her mind to fumble into the deep ends of hopelessness in her heart, and this could be the start of her healing process. With that thought in mind, she tried to lengthen her answers by offering more of her thoughts or even by asking questions. Judging by the encouraging smile Gaz sent her whenever she spoke up, he must have clocked onto her efforts.
It was odd to have someone listen to her. Playing Agustine’s bimbo had been a role where no one had paid any attention to her deliberately thoughtless words and only looked at her like she was some doll whose only asset was her looks. She had to keep repeating in her mind that those days of being used for her body were over, and that Gaz was being genuinely friendly out of the kindness of his heart – something she had last seen in the form of the granny who had taken her in, in that town she had stumbled upon.
Lunch time came eventually, as signalled by the trainer’s dismissal of the group of soldiers a good distance away. Unfortunately for Levina, the men had to pass by her bench on their way to the dining hall and she was subjected to leering eyes and low whistles that, unbeknownst to her, had started ever since they had first noticed her nearby presence. Only now did she realise that she was still dressed in the same clothes that Agustine had picked for her night; a dark blue nightdress with a low sweetheart neckline and a thin cardigan thrown over her shoulders, with the same stiletto heels – because Agustine didn’t understand practicality and had her wearing heels 24/7 – that she had stabbed him with. Chills ran down her bones at the sense of déjà vu as familiar irrational thoughts attacked her mind. She felt like a newbie again, seventeen and out of her depths among the masculinity that reeked all over the base.
“-Riven? You alright?”
“Hm?”
She quickly, with concerning ease, wiped away the insecurity in her eyes and put on the same reassuring smile she had sent Crawley. It seemed that the only times she let her face contort expressively were only when she had to fake her emotions; and she knew that Gaz had caught onto that, if his sceptical look was anything to go by.
Deciding to let her go, however, he didn’t bring that up and instead, pointed to the direction of the dining hall with his thumb. “You heading to lunch?”
She hesitated. Sure, she could do with more food, but she wasn’t keen on attracting more unwelcomed attention with her getup. Though, she really was hungry… Perhaps she’ll just channel her Tara Darwin identity again and strut there in all her confidence.
Her stomach growled at that moment and a decision was made for her. Fake it ‘til you make it, they said, and fake it ‘til she made it, she will.
Gaz grinned knowingly at her and stood up just as Levina did. They kept to silence as they headed to their destination and upon their entrance to the hall, she was hit with momentary panic at not having a place to sit. That was quickly abated, thankfully, when she spotted Crawley waving at her in invitation from his seat. She gestured to the line queueing for food and he gave an ‘okay’ sign of understanding.
“I’ll sit with a friend of mine. Thank you for the… water.”
A breath of laughter left Gaz and he turned to regard her with an amused glint in his eyes. “Of course, Riven. Can’t have you passing out from the heat now, can I?”
He had understood her connotation, that she had appreciated his company for the past few hours. He felt a sense of accomplishment at having made friends with the respectable woman and inwardly hoped for her to feel better as time would pass.
They parted ways once they had their tray of lunch in hand and Gaz beelined for his usual table where Captain Price – as she had learned during the debrief – was already present while Levina started towards where Crawley had saved a seat for her beside him. She ignored the distinct tap, tap of her heels against the wooden floor and the looks it garnered as she walked to her table. Her periphery vision showed a couple of men nudging their friends as their eyes left a heavy trail as they skimmed down her body. Suppressing her shiver of discomfort as she made the final steps, she forced her lips up into a cordial smile to the people in Crawley’s table – his current team, she surmised. Right in her guess, they each introduced themselves to her once she had sat down.
“Levina Riven. Crawley’s previous teammate, presumed dead for months.”
One of them then asked her what it was like to operate a long-con mission, which earned him a slap up the back of his head from Crawley. Gossips spread quick in the army, because what else could soldiers do other than train when bored?
Giving a lopsided smile, she answered, “besides the care pack you receive that consists of trauma?”
That got her a few laughter and they got the hint to stay off the unpleasant topic for the meantime. Crawley steered the conversation away and Levina only barely tuned in into their chatter as she ate, offering her thoughts only when they were asked for. It wasn’t like she hated the group of friends, she was just finding it hard to get a footing while dressed vulnerably amongst the uniformed men.
It’s not Agustine anymore, she repeated, you don’t have to fake it anymore.
The urge to reclaim Tara Darwin’s personality sat within reach of her grasp, so that she didn’t have to deal with her insecurity weighing on her mind – not insecurity over her body, but over the idea that her only notable trait was her body. Currently, with her lack of expressions and words, perhaps she really was nothing but a doll.
Ridding herself of that thought, she looked to the clock and finished up her meal quickly. She shot the table an apologetic smile when she was done and stood up as she reasoned her early leave with the excuse that she had to meet Laswell soon, never mind the fact that the Station Chief had stated she was free to come by her office whenever she was done with her lunch.
Once again, pulling up Tara Darwin’s confidence in her steps, Levina went to return her tray before exiting the stuffy room without catching anybody’s eyes. She slowed her steps down as she made her way to Laswell’s office, before stopping in her tracks in front of her door. Taking a deep breath, she brought one fist up to knock her knuckles against the door and stated her name and purpose as per Laswell’s request. Only once she was given permission did she enter the room with steady steps.
“Sergeant Riven, do sit down.” Levina settled on the seat across the desk in front of Laswell and kept her back straight as her superior began, “did you managed to think it through?”
“Yes, Ma’am.”
“Do share, Sergeant.”
An explicit order to voice out her opinions by a figure of authority? How she had missed the humane way the S.A.S. Army ran compared to Agustine’s organisation.
Levina didn’t let her hesitance linger around. “If it is no trouble, I would like for a few days of leave to rest and catch up with my father. After that, I am willing to return and retrain with the others or under any specific arrangement you propose to get back on my feet sooner rather than later.”
Laswell gave a nod of agreement. “No different from what I had in mind. Three weeks of leave, and these do not count towards the agreed yearly number of PTOs you have, and then you are to come back to undergo training under a supervisor – training with the fresh recruits will only slow you down. You will be wired your pay for the past seven months by the end of this week for the work you have done in accumulating valuable intel. Any more to add, Sergeant?”
A longer leave than she had thought she might receive, no PTOs deducted, and seven months of salary? Oh, how she had really missed this place. “None, Ma’am.”
“Good. I have skimmed through your intel on Agustine and commencement of extracting information from him will begin tonight. I request that you stay here for the night in case you are needed for it. Any questions?”
“None, Ma’am.”
Another nod from Laswell as she wrapped up their talk. “You will stay in room 104 in the barracks for the night and after your leave. I trust that you know where it is?”
Room 104 had been her previous room, for it was one of the two double bunk-beds room that housed the women in the station.
“Yes, Ma’am.”
“Alright.” Expecting to be dismissed, Levina was confused at Laswell’s pause. The Station Chief had a pinched expression on her face as she thought her words over. “Did none of my men offer you a change of clothes at all? Not even a single jacket?”
Surprised at the turn of conversation, her “none, Ma’am” had lost the strength to its tone and came out slightly quirked as a question.
Laswell sighed, disappointment clear in the shake of her head. “Men.”
Perhaps it was the sense of camaraderie that she felt they had as two women in a cluster of masculinity, but whatever it was, Levina had felt secured enough to let a sincere grimace take over her expression. “Men, indeed.” And perhaps it was that same understanding as a woman Laswell felt that made her not reprimand Levina for speaking without prompt.
Laswell dismissed her soon after that and she now found herself sat on her assigned bed after showering and changing into a spare grey tee and cargo pants she had found in the locker that had come with the sleeping arrangements. The other occupants of the room weren’t in at the moment so she had time alone to sort through her thoughts.
Except, as if her thoughts had decided to pull up on a strike against her mind, none stayed around long enough before her mind dozed off into thoughtlessness. Deciding that it must be her exhaustion catching up to her after a restless night, she decided to lay under her covers to get a moment of shuteye in, seeing as she had no duties to commit to that day.
However, what she had intended to be a nap ended up becoming an entire sleep in, and she only woke up hours later in the quiet of the night.
Glancing at the alarm clock, she had over an hour before it would ring through the barracks simultaneously with the other room’s. Her body felt well-rested though, and sleep wouldn’t take her back in despite her pleas and so she opted to start preparing for her day.
A quick shower later left her even more refreshed, though she only had the same outfit to change into, and she put on her complimentary pair of sneakers before heading out of the barracks. The sun had yet to grace her with its presence so she settled on roaming around under the guide of the moonlight, something she hadn’t realised she had missed until now – freedom. She had been too busy assuring herself of her identity and worth that she had forgotten she now held full autonomy over herself. Months of feigning total submission under Agustine had really taken a toll on her to that extent.
Agustine this, Agustine that. She yearned for the day that man won’t appear in her mind even once, not the tiniest sliver of him.
Her mindless walk under the cloudy sky ended up bringing her back to the bench she had taken up the morning prior and she sat at the same exact spot as she awaited dawn. It seemed that the bench was one that determined fateful meetings for her, for it wasn’t long before she found herself in a similar situation as yesterday with Gaz.
Eyes trained forward and ears ringing with memories of her months spent in hell, she had not anticipated a figure to make their presence known by sitting down beside her. The waft of espresso scent brought her back into reality and she glanced at the man beside her.
Because mum and dad had not raised an unrespectful lady, she straightened up and greeted her superior with a quiet but steady voice. “Captain Price.”
“At ease, Sergeant.”
From what she had gathered from his interactions that she had seen until now – and the gossip that Crawley had filled her in on previously – Price was not a stuck-up captain who bullied their subordinates. That as a consideration, she relaxed her shoulders and back only after a moment of hesitation and brought her hands onto her lap to fiddle with her fingers subconsciously.
“Laswell wants to see you after breakfast, in her office.”
“Understood, Captain.”
Her reply was immediate and had cut through the thick air in between them with precision. Upon learning of his intention at approaching her, she eased up further, though, confused when he remained by her side even at the first glimpse of orange in the horizon.
Entranced by the view she had not witnessed in a long while, for Agustine had always kept her in his arms until he woke up hours past dawn, she spared the man beside her no thoughts and kept her gaze locked onto the palettes of shades that the sun created against the blue sky. Distantly, she hoped against all odds that she could one day rise over the constant haunting of Agustine as the sun had peaked over the skyline. A slow process, perhaps, but she would eventually get there.
Moments after the sun had made its full appearance in all its glory, the pair heard multiple alarms go off at intervals of seconds from the barracks, signalling them of the time and availability of breakfast in the dining hall.
“And that’s my cue.”
Price got up, careful so as to not spill over his cup of strong-smelling coffee, and offered her a resolute nod of greeting. As if he knew the plagues of her mind, he continued, “you’ve fought well against him thus far. He can’t break you now, more than ever. Not anymore.”
Without giving her a chance to respond, not that she had any idea what to say, he left her staring after his back as he walked away. Mulling over his words, she silently thanked him for his acknowledgement that, indeed, the past seven months had been a fight. Her fight for justice for all the trafficked victims of Agustine’s operations, and for her sister and mother who she had to mourn over when she had only been twelve. A fight that had yet to cease now, and a fight that she would emerge victorious one day. However muted it was, action-wise, it had been a fight; she hadn’t thought of it that way.
She stayed outside for a little while longer before making her way back in to the hall to grab breakfast. Price was absent from the table she had seen him and Gaz took yesterday, but there was someone else already there amongst the few people who was early to breakfast. He sported no skull mask which meant that, by the process of elimination as she went through the mental list of Task Force 141’s names that Crawley had shared with her, the person was Soap.
She took her eyes off of him before anyone had even noticed her stare and minded her business as she got herself another sandwich for the morning. Choosing to eat her meal on the same table Crawley had invited her to previously instead of bringing it outside or to her room – or, Grace forbids, the bathroom like some high school loser in the movies – she took slow bites as her mind wandered off to theorise what Laswell needed her for later on. It was likely to do with Agustine, as Laswell had shared her purpose for staying the night in the barracks was for that, and she only hoped that she didn’t have to meet her tormentor again.
Much to her dismay, her hopes went unanswered as, moments later, she found herself walking alongside Laswell towards Agustine’s cell. Apparently, the man had kept silent all throughout his questioning, and he had asked after her one too many times for it not to be a silent request to see his former lover once again. Honest to Grace, Levina wasn’t sure why they still needed Agustine alive with the intel that she had provided, but she supposed a confirmation of her perspective was preferable to the Army. Though, she doubted that Agustine would really sell out his organisation that easily. She had lived with him for months, for fuck’s sake, she had taken the brunt of his angers and had listened to his darkest confessions with attentive ears. She knew better than anyone just how much he prided himself in having built his organisation from the ground up ever since his youths when he was still a part of a Mafia group – he had done it under wraps and had massacred the high-ranks of that Mafia once he was powerful enough, thus dismantling that one Mafia group but creating a human-trafficking organisation in its stead.
When one realised just how formidable Agustine was as an enemy, it really was almost incomprehensible and laughable how Levina had managed to wriggle her way into his ranks with a bat of her eyelash and a sway of her hips. Her impulsive disguise as a bimbo really might just spell the end of Agustine’s reign, she realised belatedly. Oh, the flaws of stupid men who think with their cocks.
As the pair of women neared their destination, Levina tried reasoning with her mind that this could be the final time she had to come face to face with Agustine. A closure, if she would. She wasn’t sure what went through the higher-up’s mind to decide that her presence might coax him into exposing his organisation but she’d amuse them for now. If her visit ended up producing no results, that was no fault of her own.
The guards let them into the station’s prison and they entered a room to see Agustine handcuffed to the table of the questioning cell on the opposite side of the one-way mirror. A few other associates were there to greet their arrival and judging by their expressions, they still had not made any progress with getting Agustine to speak.
“The only topic he would skirt around was you, Sergeant Riven. Won’t stop expressing his anger at ‘Tara’, which Price had explained was your alias.”
The more Agustine stayed within her vision, the more uncertain Levina was of her role. “Why would my presence affect his resolve to stay silent?”
“We are holding onto any possible thread at this point. You might be the key, you might not be; there is only one way to find out, Sergeant.”
“Right…”
“Ready when you are,” they had said. She swallowed her words that had wanted to shoot back that she would never be ready, not in the near future at least, along with her nerves as she willed her soul, body, and mind to remain strong in his presence. With a final deep breath, she turned the doorknob to the holding cell and entered with a blank face.
“Ah, Tara, darling. At last, you’ve shown yourself!”
His familiar condescending tone scratched at her brain harshly. “What do you want.”
A mocking grin made its way to his lips as he languidly leaned back in his chair. “Not even a “hello, how are you, Claude?” or an apology for betraying my trust? My love?”
Disgust crawled under her skin at the reminder of his rather physical show of love and of the idea that she had spent uncountable nights under his ogling and wandering hands. Not wanting to show just how much Agustine affected her, she forced herself to take a seat across him.
“I’ll consider it if you start talking.”
His eyes flashed with anger and she applauded herself for not flinching.
“About what, sweetheart? About the tricks and the lengths you’ve gone through to bewitch me? You want me to confess my love for you that you have trampled on without so much as a care? How about describing all the shameless things you’ve done in bed just to keep me satisfied? Hmm?”
Tara Darwin may have shed her sense of embarrassment for a while now, but Levina Riven had not. The two identities battled each other to shoot back her response and the winner was clear when her eyebrow sarcastically went up in feigned confidence. “What, do you want me to strip down to my socks and masturbate in front of them while we’re at it?”
The bimbo-ness of Tara Darwin’s personality in her may have been absent but holy Mother, she had not expected her candidness. Evidence of her time spent around the crass language that Agustine’s men had used, perhaps.
Annoyed at Levina’s avoidance of his bait, he dropped that tactic. “You know I won’t say shit to you guys. You’re just wasting time here.”
Grappling to grab a hold of Levina Riven’s identity, she schooled her expression once more. “Do you want me to put you out of your misery, then? If we have no use of you, I’m not against disposing you.”
Agustine let out a bark of laughter. “And then what? My people will continue even without me, you can’t do anything about that.”
So, the others have kept silence over Levina’s gathered intel on him… She wasn’t trained to question suspects so she had no idea what strategy that was but she would respect it. Knowing that this was going nowhere, she rolled her neck side to side to ease the joints, creating a series of cracks that echoed in the room. “Right, well. If you won’t speak then I’m done here, really.”
She stood up and an idea struck her on how she could begin closing this chapter in her life. Leaning over the table, she brought one hand up to take his chin and lift his face up towards her. With a single word, she cleared the apprehension in his face and his eyes stared back lifelessly as he was subjected to the memories of his past trauma that the word had brought up.
“Marcire.”
The rest of the team, which had expanded with the addition of Captain Price and Gaz, looked at her with varying degrees of oddness etched onto their features when she emerged from the holding cell. She looked questioningly at them and glanced at Agustine’s shell-shocked state when Laswell pointed towards him. “What did you say to him at the end?”
“Marcire; Italian for ‘rot’. He associates that word with a couple of past traumas from his time in the Mafia.” It was probably a really low, bitch move on her part to pull up his trauma, but he is a human-trafficker. He had been served at a level that he himself served.
“Just how much did he confide in you…”
Levina gave a noncommittal shrug. “I did find a wedding ring in his drawer one day. I was spending 24 hours a day by his side then, so there could have been no one else he was seeing.”
Her confession brought surprise to the room as each of them realised that they had underestimated just how flawlessly Levina had single-handedly tricked Agustine. Acting hadn’t even been one of the skills listed in her file – that needed updating, quick.
Another one of her associates cleared his throat. “Right. We’ll try questioning him again once he’s snapped out of his… current state. Thank you for your time, Sergeant Riven.”
“Of course, sir.”
Laswell then turned to address her and she stiffened her back and shoulders slightly. “I have approved your leave for the next three weeks. You are free to leave any time after noon today.”
“Thank you, Ma’am.”
Upon having nothing more to add from either side of the party, Laswell then dismissed her and she left the prison with Gaz following after her. It was only after they made it outside that Gaz struck up a conversation with her.
“Heard you were leaving today and wanted to catch you before that. I only realised earlier that I haven’t gotten your number and that was unacceptable!”
Levina didn’t stop in her tracks as she aimlessly walked around the HQ once again, but it was a near thing. “I don’t know where they kept my phone.” At Gaz’s confusion, she clarified, “from back when I was first presumed dead. I tend not to bring it with me during missions.”
In agreement that her then-captain would likely be the person who would know the whereabouts of her personal cell, they decided to head up to Mavers’ office. There, they found him alone and busy with paperwork but he, nevertheless, invited them in. As it turns out, the Captain had sent all of Levina’s personal belongings back home, to her father, as per the guidelines, so, high possibility she’d find the device amongst them there. With a grateful nod to him, the pair left the office just as quickly as they had entered and recommenced their walk around the vicinity; not before Gaz had asked to borrow a slip of paper and a pen, though.
“There. So that you can text me whenever you’ve found your phone.”
She pocketed the paper with Gaz’s phone number written on it with a touch of appreciation. Prior to Gaz, her only friends had been her team and her roommates in Room 104, and so far, that entire team had been wiped out, save for Crawley, and she had yet to reconcile with the ladies as she had been dead-asleep when they had returned to the barracks the evening before.
A fresh chapter in her life, indeed.
Words escaped her when she tried to voice out her gratitude to him. No matter, there was still a lifetime ahead of her – however short it may be due to her line of work – to express herself.
The weather was cooler than it had been yesterday and there were no hints of grey clouds in sight. Deciding that it was a good day to bask in the sun, they ended up sitting on the same bench from the day before – and that morning, for her. As Levina was to leave and return to civilian life in a few hours, they ended up talking about the pre-military life that seemed so far away now; from childhood dreams to subjects they had enjoyed in school, even insignificant crushes in elementary because, who hasn’t had them?
Gaz was sharing an anecdote of the time he had pissed his pants due to stage fright when they were interrupted by the approach of another man. They spotted Soap closing his distance to the pair with purposeful strides and Levina didn’t miss the way Gaz lit up in understanding.
“He probably needs me for something- we’ll have to cut our time short, unfortunately.”
He gave her a frown and she was saved from having to respond when Soap arrived in front of them. The newcomer extended a hand to Levina as he introduced himself. “Sergeant Johnny MacTavish, better known as ‘Soap’. Gaz’s teammate and the best-looking lad in the station.”
She felt rude, meeting his cheeky and playful grin with a blank expression, so she strained an upward curl of her lips into a harmless smile. Hoping that her moment of hesitation to take his hand went unnoticed, she stated her name and rank in exchange.
His brightness unwavering even at her muted response, his grin remained in place as he snapped his hand onto his waist, casting his extended shadow onto the pair sat on the bench.
“I see that Gaz was quicker than me! Would like to say that I’m a big fan of yours; shame, what he did to your heels, but that was a badass move if I’ve ever seen one.”
“Oh.” Levina blinked in pleasant surprise, “thank you?”
It was a calculated but rash decision, to stab Agustine’s thigh with her pointed heels. She had no weapons on her back then, when she had realised that he was planning to catch her off-guard, and he would, no doubt, overpower her with sheer strength if she had not used everything she had to her advantage. She hadn’t even been sure if the stiletto would be sharp enough to cut into his flesh but surprised, she was, when it did without so much of an obstruction. And that action had given her a fan… the Grace up above could not tell her if that was a good thing or not.
“Anyways, I’d love to chat more with you but alas, duty has called for me and my mate, here.” Gaz stood up with a sigh and Soap wasted no time in throwing an arm around his shoulder. “I’ll see you around, yeah? Don’t be a stranger.”
Gaz offered her a smile. “Text me when you’re free, a’ight? Enjoy your well-deserved leave and stay safe, Riven.”
“Will do.”
The pair of men left her with a lasting grin and Levina let her eyes linger after them as they got further away. A sigh escaped her at her lonely circumstance and she opted to remain in her seat for a while longer. Her clothes blended in amongst her colleagues so she felt better in her skin compared to when she had been in a nightdress. Thus, she didn’t mind her current spot near the soldiers undergoing outdoor training.
It was a mindset she had trained to achieve, and so did every woman in the field, to find her place within the dense fog of masculinity and testosterone, and to hold it strong against the judgmental looks and condescending tones sent her way. That feminine force in her had weakened over the months as Tara Darwin’s submissiveness to men vigorously fought against her true psyche, but she knew it was still within her – she just had to patch herself back up.
When it was a few minutes to noon, she headed back to her room to double-check if she had left anything behind – never mind the fact that she had arrived empty handed. She felt silly, debating over whether she wanted to keep the white pair of Louboutin heels gifted by Agustine, for it was, after all, so bloody expensive (pardon the pun) and worth it to put in the effort to clean off the blood. Quick in her decision, however, she decided against it to save herself the headache of having a parting gift from the despicable man; the mental lasting touches of his were enough of a burden, she didn’t need physical ones too.
Disposing Agustine’s money’s worth of outfit, she washed her hands clean of the unseen contamination afterwards, scrubbing the soap harshly against her skin like she did her entire body in her first shower back here.
In a spur of the moment – her decision-making skills really were as impulsive as they come, she realised – she decided to leave after having her lunch here so that she didn’t have to stop by somewhere on her way back home. She met Gaz’s and Soap’s waves with a nod, giving another one to Price when he had turned to see who the pair was greeting in curiosity, and took her tray to Crawley’s table once again. With an almost-minute friendly smile plastered onto her lips, she greeted the occupants of the table and settled into silence as she ate her meal, speaking up only when prompted. She finished up in no time, more than eager to see her father again, and set her destination to home as she walked out of the compounds.
The Army had issued her a temporary spare card to take the public transport back home seeing as: one, her personal card was sent home following her ‘death’; and two, her car was also sent home and was, more than likely, sold by her father as he had no use of it – as he got older, he decided not to risk driving with a flawed eyesight and opted to take the public transport instead.
It was a two-hours ride back home and she had only her mind to keep her company. Two hours of boredom felt almost quick in comparison to seven months of hell though, and before long, she found herself standing in the doorway of the humble flat she had made into a home with her dad – the initial house for her entire family had been too big – too painful – to maintain.
Levina felt her heart beat out of her chest and shook her hands to get rid of some nerves. With a shaking hand, she pressed the button for her apartment number on the intercom and waited for a response. It was a Saturday which meant that her dad wouldn’t be out for work, and Laswell had mentioned previously that they would give him a heads up regarding her not-dead state of wellbeing. Only two seconds had passed when she heard the audio crackle over the speaker and then a voice calling out.
“Vina?”
She felt tears prick her eyes at the familiar cadence she had missed dearly and her voice came out shaky when she responded, “dad?”
“Bless my heart- it’s you!”
The door to the building buzzed open and she wasted no time in tracing her steps to the elevator. She wrung her hands to settle the urge to spam the elevator door close and tapped her foot as she was brought higher and higher into the building. She sped her way to the right unit and anxiously knocked on the door the moment it was within reach. The door swung open and she only got a glimpse of her dad’s face before she was brought into a tight hug.
“Oh Vina, you’ve come home! You’re alive! You’re alive-”
He cut himself off with a sob that wracked through his entire body and she was immediately crying with him, didn’t even bother holding her tears back.
“Dad-” Levina sobbed as she tightened her hold around her dad, “I’m sorry- I’m so sorry-”
“Not your fault, darling,” she felt him shake his head, their hairs ruffling against each other, “not at all…” And oh, how she had missed the soothing affection that came with being called terms of endearments.
He pulled back and kept Levina near with a grasp on her shoulders, then brought a hand up to gently brush away the hairs that had stuck onto her face. “Let me look at you- oh, sweetheart… you’ve gotten even more lovely since!”
In the comfort of her father, she felt her mind ease enough that expressing herself didn’t feel like a chore.
Fondness pulled the corner of her trembling lips upwards as she let out another sob. “I’m home, dad- I’m home.”
They eventually made their way inside the unit and locked the door behind them. Settling on the couch, their hands remained clasped as they tried to make up for the seven months that had forced them apart.
Her wellbeing always a priority in his heart, his eyes shone with worry as he asked, “have you eaten? I can whip out something quick if you need. Was there anything in particular that you’ve missed eating? Mom’s special carbonara? Roast chicken? Or-”
“Slow down, dad! I’m alright!” A watery laugh escaped her, “I had lunch before I left the compounds so I’m good.”
Placated slightly, her dad quietened down as he raked his eyes over her face, taking in the features he had missed. She did the same, trailing her eyes as she matched their similar features in his nose and eyes. Her lips mirrored her mom’s but her sister had gotten dad’s. Speaking of…
Levina felt another round of tears threaten to slip out but managed to reign it in for the sake of not worrying her dad. Laswell had specified the need to keep Agustine’s records confidential within the military for the meantime so Levina didn’t have the greenlight to let her dad know of his youngest daughter’s fate. She silently strengthened her promise to do everything she could to bring her sister back if she was still alive.
The reunited pair of family ended up talking the afternoon away as they caught each other up on their lives. Levina had confided in him, tears streaming down her face, of her fear of losing her identity and of her grief over her mental exhaustion at expressing herself. He held her in his arms and she felt like a child all over again, with the way he caressed her hair as he listened attentively to her worries.
“Oh, Vina. Despite everything, you are still you. My daughter whom I cherish so much, the girl who gave the ‘monster under the bed’ a teddy because she hadn’t wanted it to be lonely, the woman you have grown to be whose parents are so, so proud of.”
That had rightfully earned him another wave of cries from Levina.
“We’ll take it one step at a time, yeah? No need to rush, there’s all the time in the world to give you the space you need to heal. And don’t you think for one second that you’re alone in all of this, I’m here for you whenever you need me, love.”
Always so patient, her dad was. She did, after all, inherit that trait from somewhere – and how validated she felt when she acknowledged that no, her only trait wasn’t her pretty looks, there was much more to her than that.
They ended up ordering in for dinner, their crying session having seeped away their energy. After a shower, she didn’t stay up long before turning in for the night, her dad following not too far behind. He had kept her room clean despite her months of absence and she found the belongings that the Army had sent home all packed in an unopened box.
She rummaged through it in search for her phone and its charger, then plugged it up to let it charge overnight as she slept. Exhaustion pulled her into sleep quickly and left her dreamless that night. The sun was only beginning to peak over the skyline when she woke up and her room lit up in the faintest of light. The cool tile under her feet grounding her, she headed to the kitchen to prepare a cup of black tea for herself and her dad, knowing that her family was full of early birds and that he’ll be seeking his own shot of pick-me-up in a moment. True to their persisting routine, her dad shuffled out of his room not long after and beelined for his own cup after giving her an affectionate hug.
A comforting silence blanketed over them in the chilly autumn air. Levina scooted closer to her dad when he sat beside her on the couch and leaned her head against his shoulder, his arm coming up to keep her close. They spent the early morning gazing out the big living room window that looked over the other buildings, as they simply basked in each other’s missed presence.
As if no time had been lost between them, they settled into their previous patterns whenever Levina would stay over in between deployments. Except, the solemn air fleeting past them told of the hardship that they have suffered from to get to this dear moment in time.
The reminders of love that she received from her dad were able to wipe away some associations of love that she had with Agustine. Her dad’s companionship over the days had also helped her fully accept the fact that she was now out of reach from Agustine. He could no longer worsen her state and ruin things for her any further; or in Price’s words, he couldn’t break her now. That realisation gradually, bit by bit, eased the weariness that had locked up her expressions. There was no more Agustine, hence, no longer a need to keep her psyche fortified against the fear of being unloved. Trips to the movies, restaurants, and shops with her dad were opportunities to test out her expressiveness and by the end of her third week, she could at least manage genuine grateful smiles to strangers. Her confidence in her ability to heal took its time to rise but rise, it did.
The day she had to return to her duties had been a teary day but both of them had strengthened their resolve to not cry because they will meet again, as they have always promised. She decided against purchasing a car and opted to take the public transport instead as she didn’t tend to venture elsewhere besides the compound and her home. Levina was to arrive at her compound by noon so, with the two hours ride to consider, she left early in the morning after bidding her father farewell.
When she made it to the compound, it was a while before lunch time would start so there were soldiers roaming around the station. With foresight, she was dressed in the same grey tee and cargo pants that blended into the surroundings so she didn’t capture a significant amount of attention as she headed to the barracks. Once she had deposited her belongings, she walked straight to Laswell’s office to report her presence. Upon Laswell’s permission, she walked in, feeling more herself than the last time she had been here.
“Sergeant Riven. It’s good to see you well.”
Laswell launched into business immediately, sharing that Agustine was now in the custody of the state prison after the never-ending failures to pry information out of the man. The next assignment to tackle one of his bases of operations would happen in the coming weeks in hopes of attacking his men in the middle of their chaos of their missing ringleader. If that assignment went well, they would be looking at finally having the complete records in the organisation’s system.
“We now have options to discuss in terms of locations and who to watch out for during these missions all thanks to you, Sergeant. Your efforts are greatly appreciated.”
They then talked about Levina’s current position in the station; Lieutenant Mitch Mordell had been tasked with supervising her training and she was to obey his direction in the meantime. Officially, Levina had not been appointed a team to work with but Mordell had promised good progress within two months so her file would be updated then for the team captains to consider her as an asset. Training would start the next day, but Mordell had requested to pass along his message asking Levina to meet with him after lunch that day.
“Any more to add, Sergeant?”
“None, Ma’am.”
“Dismissed. Welcome back, Sergeant.”
Now with minutes to spare before lunch time opens, Levina decided she might as well wait in the dining hall which, upon entering it, it seemed that a few others had decided to do the same. She spotted Gaz and Soap chatting at their table just as Soap looked up reflexively upon her entrance.
“Riven!”
Now that had attracted the room’s attention.
Her hand paused in the air mid-wave and she blinked in series, caught off-guard by the loudness of Soap’s voice. Pointedly ignoring the others in the room, she walked over to the pair with the intention to say hi. They were friends after all – Gaz and her had corresponded over texts and, a week into it, he had passed along Soap’s request to have her number. They were pleasant people to talk with, she had decided, and they didn’t judge her preference of using emoticons over emojis.
Once she was stood at the head of the table, Gaz on her left and Soap on her right, the former made a sound of wonder as his eyes darted to run their gaze over her hair.
“New hairstyle? It suits you, Riv.”
“Hell yeah, you look good with it!”
As per the cardinal rule to a lady’s guide on how to get over a breakup – though, it wasn’t exactly the ‘breakup’ part that she was trying to get over – Levina had gone to the salon to get her hair cut. Inexperienced with hairstyles for she had always stuck to a simple long style that she could braid for practical purposes, she simply allowed the hairstylist to find the best fit for her. Thus, she ended up with a slightly-past shoulder-length wolf cut and a perm to keep the curls consistent – seeing as she wouldn’t be able to style it manually every morning – that she could still gather into a braid if needed. Needless to say, the mirror gave her a boost of self-confidence and she was happy with her new something that made up her identity as Levina Riven.
“Thanks, guys.” Here, she could manage the slight smile to her lips to convey her gratitude. That seemed to brighten Gaz up and he could see that she had been truthful in her responses of ‘doing great’ wellbeing whenever he had asked her over text. “Just thought I might switch it up for a change. Giving credit where credit’s due, the hairstylists did a great job.”
“Well, credit where credit’s due, I think you did a great job pulling it off.” Soap gave his classic cheeky grin. “And also, in sitting still long enough because- let me tell you, my ass cannot do that.”
A breath of amusement left her in an exhale that didn’t go unnoticed by the pair, much to their delight at having tugged on her sense of humour.
“Anyways, why’re you still standing?! Here- sit, sit.”
“Oh.” Levina eyed the empty spot that Gaz had scooted further along the bench to create. Uncertainty washed over her and she glanced at the clock, then Crawley’s empty table, before deciding to take the boys up on their offer. “Well, if you don’t mind…”
“Not at all,” Gaz waved away her concerns with ease.
“So, how have you both been?”
At Levina’s question, they took turns sharing snippets of interesting stories that they had not shared previously. They ranged from the latest gossip in the compound, to their personal accounts of the different ways they got their ass beaten by each other during hand-to-hand combat training.
By the end of it all, the hall had already opened for lunch. Levina stood up to join the two in grabbing her own share of food but she paused when Soap narrowed his eyes at her. She subconsciously tilted her head in question.
“You’ll come back here once you grab your food, won’t you? You haven’t told us how you’ve been!”
Turning to Gaz for help had been useless because she caught him nodding earnestly instead, in complete agreement with Soap. “Can’t just leave us hanging like that.”
Her lips parted in genuine surprise. “I’ve got someone wai-” but her words got lodged in her throat when she realised that Crawley hadn’t even shown up yet. A different approach then. “I wouldn’t want to intrude the others you normally sit with.”
At that moment, Soap seemed to have spotted something – or rather, someone – behind Levina and he brightly cheered out, “you wouldn’t be! Isn’t that right, Cap?”
Price rounded the table from where he had appeared from behind Levina to take his seat on the free space beside Soap, diagonally across her. An eyebrow quirked up at the scene in front of him, his eyes lingered slightly on Levina’s instinctively stiffened figure before addressing the men. “At ease, Sergeant Riven. And why are you all stood in place like a pack of flamingos?”
Soap preoccupied with feigning mock offense at Price’s comment, Gaz explained in his stead. “Say, Cap, you wouldn’t mind if we invite Riven here to our table for lunch, would you?”
“What is this, elementary school?” Price turned to her once again. “Sit wherever you want, Sergeant. Though, keep in mind, the boys hold grudges.”
“Right…” Bewildered at the situation, she hadn’t even noticed that her eyes had opened slightly wider.
“Great! You stay here, Riven, and I’ll go grab you a tray.”
Nope, she decided, that was too much for her to handle.
The boys had immediately left the table after Soap had stated his offer and she quickly exited the bench to catch up after them. “I can do that myself, thank you very much!”
It spoke volumes just how needed her leave was to heal herself with the way she was able to exclaim and hold her voice steady when just three weeks ago, she could only manage low mutters and a stoic face when she didn’t have to answer to a figure of authority. Besides her dad, she had Gaz and Soap to thank for to have made this much progress; and perhaps even Price for his brief words of encouragement that had acknowledged her strength and perseverance.
“I’m glad you have good people with you there,” her dad had said when she told him of the new people she had met, “you don’t have to be alone to heal from your wounds.”
Lunch, overall, had been an enjoyable affair. She got to speak of her outings with her dad and, though she had not voiced it out, the others knew that the most significant part of her three-weeks leave had been the steady growth she’s made in healing herself.
Time passed by in a blur and they soon had to part ways. She headed straight for Lieutenant Mordell’s office and knocked on the door upon her arrival.
“Name and purpose!”
“Sergeant Riven! You asked to see me, Sir!”
He announced for her to enter and she did so with a bated breath.
She took her respectful stance across his desk in front of him and noticed the way the burly man stood taller than her and had a stony expression on his face. He hummed in thought for a moment as he took her figure in methodically, then nodded to himself as if she had somehow already passed his first test.
“Sergeant Riven!” His voice boomed slightly in the compact room and she didn’t allow herself to waver even the slightest.
“Yes, Sir!”
Pleased with her effort in matching his tone, he eased down his volume. “As Laswell has likely told you, I will be in charge of your personal training until you’ve gotten back on your feet. I’ve given my word that two months will be enough time to manage that and I do not go back on my words, do you understand?”
“Understood, Sir.”
“I’ve read your file and have heard good things about you from Captain Mavers, Sergeant, I suggest you live up to your potential and make us proud, you hear me?”
“Yes, Sir.”
He gave another nod and then took his seat behind his desk. “Sit down, Sergeant. I’ll run you through the strategies I’ve planned.”
Intensive training, he had called it, and she could see why. Her muscles almost ached at the thought of all the physical exertion she’d have to undergo for the next two months and she already dreaded the weeks when she’d be on her period. She couldn’t complain though, it was for her benefit after all. He gave her a copy so that she wouldn’t go into everyday blindly and for that, she thanked him. All in all, Lieutenant Mordell was a stern but not an unreasonable man, suitable to be the one to push her to her limits for the coming months. She just hoped he’ll do so kindly.
That night, she was able to reconnect with her roommates. There wasn’t much that had happened over the past eight months that she could share freely with the girls so she spent most of their chatter actively listening to the others talk, quipping on occasions.
With how good her day had gone, it seemed that the world had wanted to rectify the balance because she found herself waking up groggy the next morning as memories of her time as Agustine’s woman had plagued her all night. For what felt like an entire minute, she then stood under the flow of steaming water as if she could wash away the lingering feel of his touches that continued to haunt her. Nightmares weren’t uncommon to her; years of serving in the army had inevitably compiled tons of horrific materials for her brain to choose from to suffice as great content to reminisce during her sleep. Though, Agustine would undoubtedly reign supreme as the ‘content of the year’ that would show up to fight against the peaceful moonlight in her mind, much to her dismay.
Her schedule would start at a much more appropriate time in the morning so she was free to do anything until then. Not one to break habits, she settled onto the fateful bench and stared forward into the empty sky, awaiting the first glimmer of sunlight. Also a creature of mornings, it seemed, Price had joined her moments later with his steaming cup of coffee in his hands.
He had spotted her fixing her posture when she had first caught sight of him and, before she could even greet him in respect, he had knowingly huffed out an “at ease, Sergeant”, voice rough from unuse but warm against the chilly air.
They settled into companionable silence as the sun began to rise. When her thoughts of Agustine had crescendo-ed into fortissimo, she began to unknowingly scratch at her inner wrist where he had, more often than not, held her down against the bed as he played her body in tune with his sick fantasies. Her mind had been replaying her pain and distress when it abruptly went static when her ears had picked up on a sound in the real world.
She turned towards the source of her well-timed rescue and the blue taking over her sight grounded her more than the sky had ever done in the past three weeks – which said a lot seeing as the sky had provided sanctuary for her when the nights had been particularly bad. Unlike the clear blue that submissively made way for the sun to take its place, this new blue had stormy greys woven into it to emphasise the strength behind it. Blue had always been her favourite colour, but it was only now that she had decided on a favourite shade.
Blinking slowly as she regained her bearings, the specks of concern in Price’s eyes grew with every second that passed in silence. She rewound the past minute in her head and relistened closely to the sound that had brought her back to reality.
“Oh.”
Price had called out to her and she had unintentionally responded with an intense staring contest. Way to go, Lev, she grimaced inwardly, such a perfectly functional human being you are.
“Sorry, Captain- head in the clouds.”
Searching her eyes and finding none of the toxic haze that had been prominent in them prior to her snapping out of her daze, he passed off his sigh of relief as an exhale and glanced up. “It’s a clear sky this morning, Sergeant.” Her lips quirked up and he found himself mirroring it.
Taking his words for it – she had no idea where that sense of trust came from – her eyes never casted themselves upwards even as she responded assuredly, “so it is, Captain.”
The cacophony of alarm clocks ringing started at that moment and she turned back to face forwards at his previously-proclaimed ‘cue’ to leave. It seemed that she was right when he stood up, but she faced him again when he addressed her.
“You drink coffee, Sergeant?”
She had a speculation as to where this was going and found herself willingly playing along to his proposition. “More of a tea person, Captain.”
“Black?”
“And no sugar.”
He had unquestionably been caught but he didn’t let that faze him the slightest. “I’ll make a note of that, Sergeant.”
“Thank you, Captain.”
Her gratitude had escaped her in a low voice but he easily picked up on it anyway. With a final nod to her, he left her bubble of safety without popping it in his stride.
A thoughtful man, Price was. His calm patience at letting her return to her senses in her own time was an admirable attribute of his and she had felt respected upon being subjected to it earlier. She was uncertain as to why his eyes had become the most impactful grounding material for her thus far and she didn’t even know if she wanted to further investigate the matter – not that she would know how to do that in the first place. For singlehandedly pulling her out of the depths of her mind’s torment, she appreciated him. And if her hypothesis regarding the reasoning behind his question on how she preferred her drink was right, he must’ve at least also liked her company enough. She felt a comforting fuzziness in her chest and quickly waved it away.
She wasn’t born yesterday; she recognised the kindling flame in her heart. Fear prevented her from tending to it though, but hope bared its fangs and warded off any attempts in extinguishing it. So, she’ll sit back at watch it nurture on its own for now.
Not wanting to risk being late for her schedule, she only stayed outside for a moment longer before heading back in for breakfast. Always a person who got easily anxious about being late, she ended up in the gym early. Mordell arrived while she was in the midst of stretching and she swiftly stood up straight to salute her lieutenant.
Cue the commencement of her intensive training.
Mordell’s curated plans had not allowed for an easy beginning, immediately kicking off into pushing Levina past her ‘pathetic limits’, as he had dubbed. She had visited the local gym during her leave and had, too, been appalled at her maximum capability – it had dropped so low that it was almost as if it was her first day in cadet training. She could only imagine the pinched expression Mordell would have if he knew about that.
Getting her stamina back up was her priority in the past three weeks, and she applauded herself for that decision because it proved beneficial when Mordell gave her only small windows of breaks throughout the day. Her lunchtime now had a time limit and she could only stuff her face of her meal ceaselessly, much to the bemusement of Crawley and his team.
She didn’t hold back from putting in all her efforts which resulted in the lack of beratement from Mordell at the end of the day. There was no escaping his harsh words entirely though, and all she could do, other than try harder, was to fortify her mind against the – almost – degradation. Mordell was at least a more respectful person than the trainer during her cadet training; those times were bad enough that they had shown up as nightmares a handful of times even years later.
Finally, the final half an hour of dinner had come, which signalled the end of the day’s schedule. Her arms were limp by her side, sore from overexertion, as she trekked her way to the canteen. She tended to be amongst the early-comers of mealtimes and had expected less people towards the end of them, thus, rendering her slightly surprised when she entered the canteen only to see that it was rather packed.
As if he had been waiting for her arrival, Gaz was already waving to catch her attention when she walked into the hall. Upon meeting her eyes, he patted the empty seat next to her and she was about to give a nod when her eyes fell upon the rest of the table’s occupants who had reflexively turned towards her at Gaz’s actions.
Oh, she realised, the whole gang was here.
Lieutenant Simon “Ghost” Riley was an easily distinguishable person; built tall and broad, with the unmistakeable face covering in the form of an iconic skull mask on-field or a balaclava off-field. The lower half of his face covered, Levina couldn’t get a read of his expression at Gaz’s invitation to her.
Sporting a lopsided smile that was half genuine, she gestured to the empty queue for food which Gaz understood. She wasn’t sure how her presence would be taken by the lieutenant but seeing as he had remained in place even as she approached with her tray in hand, she surmised that he at least didn’t already dislike her.
A round of greetings came from the three men she was already familiar with when she reached the table, countering with her own “hey, guys”. Whatever had happened that morning with Price, it established a strong enough connection between the two that he didn’t even bat an eyelash when she didn’t immediately salute him; if anything, he seemed pleased at the lack of her gesture of respect.
Her eyes naturally landed on the only person she had not greeted and she offered him a warm smile. “Sergeant Levina Riven. Under the direct orders of Lieutenant Mordell.”
“Lieutenant Ghost. Task Force 141.”
Despite being obstructed, his voice was as sharp as the greeting nod he gave.
Having cleared the introductions, she took her seat next to Gaz and noticed that the area of the table in front of both Price and Ghost were clean, while Gaz and Soap had an empty tray. She couldn’t help but wonder if they usually stayed for dinner even after they had finished their meals or if they had done so this time because of her…
“Told you she wouldn’t run.” Pride was clear in Soap’s tone as he addressed Ghost, who gave a gruff of acknowledgment in response.
Just like that, dots connect in her head and she regarded Soap with an eyebrow raised, lips curled into a sliver of an amused smile. “You taking bets on me now? That’s hurtful, Soap.”
The aforementioned man stammered a defence, taken aback by her accurate judgement and the rare expressiveness to her words. Perhaps his playfulness had infected her.
Gaz shook his head in mock disappointment at the way his friend had easily exposed them. “Dumbass.”
Just before she started digging into her food, she added, “and for the record, why would I?”
She missed the glint of approval that flickered in the men’s eyes, though, she caught only a glimpse of a pleased smile on them before she looked to Ghost who had spoken up.
“These men like you too much so I thought I’d see for myself why.”
Surprised at the implication that she was a common topic of conversation amongst the men, she hadn’t even realised that her smile had gone a tad shy.
“Well, I’ve no idea what they’ve been telling you but I’m flattered, nonetheless.”
“Only the good things, Riv, only the good things.”
They asked her about her first day of training, how it was like to be under Mordell’s supervision. Their conversation then turned to reminiscing their cadet years, bonding over each other’s complaints of the harsh words they had to endure and unanimously agreeing that Price’s experiences were the worse with how military the way things had ran in his time.
Levina also got to see the 141’s dynamic and she commended Price for his choice of men to take under his wings. They were all honourable men, as far as she could see, each with their own set of characters and beliefs that individually distinguished them. It struck her as odd that they’ve decided she was worthy of their time, and she let their implicit validation of her character solidify the cultivating idea that she was more than just a pretty face and body. They treated her well, she liked them.
Her fatigue caught up to her in her sleep that night and her mind took a day off from picking on her in her dreams. She woke up with her entire body sore and languid, and her remedy came in the form of a hot shower and a cup of black tea.
Correct in her speculation, Price had brought two cups of drinks that morning, handing her one that had been made to her preference.
“You are a saint, Captain.”
He had given her a mirthful smile as he made to sit beside her.
“You don’t always have to keep up formalities with me, Sergeant.”
“I mean, you do call me ‘Sergeant’ a lot, Captain.”
“Touché, Sergeant. Touché.”
A delightful breath of air left her in an exhale. “Can I call you ‘Price’, then?”
“You’re more than welcomed to, Riven.”
A beat.
The flames crackled stronger.
The morning chill stood no chance against the combined warmth of her heart and the tea, both of which were prepared lovingly by the man beside her. Oh, how he had made a home out of her.
As the weeks passed, dinnertimes and mornings became her favourite parts of the day.
The group of men had, without her knowledge, agreed to occupy Levina’s dinners whenever they could. Their schedules didn’t always match but that didn’t stop them from insisting that she joined whoever was available when she was. Most of the time it was Ghost – she had learned over many conversations that he was a man who valued consistency – and at least one other person. But, by the time there came an evening where it was only him, they had already grown closer to the point where he had not minded eating in her presence.
The boys provided her a relief from a full day of hard work. They engaged her in affable chatter that opened more doors between them to grow closer, or, in the days where training had been too harsh, they still left the door open but didn’t impinge on her bubble. Their consideration only made her want to treat them equally, asking about their days with sincere interest or understandingly laying off of them when they seek quiet tranquillity after an awful day.
They had each other’s backs, the boys and her. Their friendship had been built on compassion and respect ever since they first met with weapons in each of their hands – guns in theirs, and deception in hers – though, they were never pointed at each other – except Ghost did but she held nothing against his initial apprehensions.
And then there were mornings. Those were when she got to watch her psyche’s fire develop, inching closer and closer to it as her hope gradually began to subdue her fear. She had gotten to the point where she could feel the first wave of heat wash over her, enticing her to approach nearer – to take her shelter behind it. It wasn’t like Price had done anything different, no. It was simply the fact that he allowed her to take her place beside him every morning without fail, putting effort into brewing her tea correctly, and letting her take over the reigns of their budding relationship – giving her the control that she needed, unlike Agustine who had dominated over her at every second.
She couldn’t say for sure that Price felt similarly towards her. He never gave any inclinations that he did, but neither had he rebuffed her in any way, whatsoever. Months of operating under an entirely different identity meant that she didn’t want to shut in her feelings anymore. That resulted in a new quirk of hers: unless she had to – that is, in front of anyone else other than her dear ones – she didn’t stand in the way of her eyes’ tell-all. ‘The eyes are the window to the soul’, indeed. That, paired with Price’s undeniably sharp intuition, hinted at the idea that he knew of her sprouting crush on him.
Levina could only imagine what she looked like in his eyes. Did her eyes gleam in adoration? Did her gaze linger on him at dinnertimes shared with the boys? Grace knows, the others might have also picked up on her emotions if she did.
The station didn’t have books to turn to that could help her; there were no ‘An Idiot’s Way to Know If He Has a Crush on You’ or ‘Dating 101: How to Manage Your Crush’. She could technically talk to her roommates about it, initiate a classic boy-talk sleepover, but that would only create rumours and gossips – Grace forbids, what if she got caught wanting to fraternise and more with her superior? So, yeah, not the best idea to risk that.
That left her with one more material that she could turn to for aid: memories of Agustine.
Needless to say, that was immediately out of question. Though, perhaps she could refer to them as a guide on how to spot red flags in a man.
All that is to say, she might not know the nature of his feelings for her – and every day, hers only grew stronger – nevertheless, she was content with their current stage of relationship. If more would happen, that would be to her joy; but she wasn’t selfish, she would take what she can get.
Blessed by the Grace, however, it turned out that all her worrying about the reciprocity of her feelings would come to a halt one day. And that had come with news.
The first two weeks of her training had come and gone, and it was now the third week. Sometime before she had reached her window for lunch, Mordell had actually wrapped up the day’s schedule rather abruptly.
“Laswell wants to see you. Go freshen up and see her. You can have your lunch after that and then you’ve got the rest of the day free.”
Levina did just as he ordered and visited Laswell’s office once she had showered. Lunch had already started so the quietness of her path on the way there felt oddly eerie to her. The uncanniness to her day so far only foretold the news that would be shared to her, however, where she would then be stood in front of Laswell as the earth-shattering words flowed out of the Station Chief’s mouth.
Her ears rang with screams and cries that sounded familiar to her, accompanied by a blaring siren as words of condolences and apologies began filling her head. Her eyes were locked onto the screen of the computer that Laswell had swivelled so that she could see two pictures of a girl, at different ages, and her listed details beside it.
Name: Aurora Riven (006)
Acquisition: March 27th, 2007 (8 years old)
Sold: October 16th, 2015 (16 years old)
Bid Price: $3,000,000
Bidder: Jake Griffon
The top picture had been exactly how Levina remembered her sister. Wide-eyed and innocent, she was just a child- she was eight, for fuck’s sake! Her pigtails were dishevelled, bangs unkempt, and her face was streaked with uncountable tear stains and swipes of blood. Her frightened expression here would forever haunt her.
The picture below it was the one she had seen back in February. Presumably when she was sixteen – a commemorative picture taken for the day she had been sold. Her appearance was tidy, the absence of a hair out of place and bloodstains were a sharp contrast to the first picture. Her smile here reminded Levina of Tara Darwin but whereas both Tara and Aurora seemed to be genuinely smiling, despite the years of absence, Levina knew her sister enough to tell that the latter was faked. How much had her sister gone through to have learnt how to pass off her expressions as sincere – Grace, she didn’t want to think about it.
But she had to, because reality was that and they were both living in it.
Bile made its way up her throat and she had to quickly swallow it down with great effort. Tears prickled at the corner of her eyes and this, she unfortunately couldn’t keep at bay. Laswell understood though, and she didn’t bring it up nor condemn Levina for it, sympathy clear in her eyes and her tone as she addressed the only other person in the room.
“As I’ve said, the mission was a success and we now have their system’s data on our side.”
Levina couldn’t even feel the relief if she wanted to. She only barely registered Laswell’s words in her chaotic mind.
“We’ve recognised that the name ‘Jake Griffon’ was one of the big-name buyers in your intel and we’ve ran the numbers on the records. He has bought over eight people from Agustine; it seems that she was the first.”
She took a sharp inhale.
The first. The insinuation was heavy; Griffon would’ve treated the first one he bought as an experiment before he had decided that he wanted more.
The first. Aurora had no one to relate to and she would have been all alone to fend for herself.
The first.
A pause.
Memories began invading her mind of all the times Griffon had come up as a topic in Agustine’s meetings.
“Another one?! We all know he’s loyal to that first bitch he bought- why’d he come back?!”
“They say that the beau he first took in was an easy sell. Wish I was buying then; would’ve snatched her right up from all those disgusting men!”
“What was the feedback he gave when he first came back to buy a second one? “Need me another one of those pliable bitches that you sell”, wasn’t it?”
Oh.
And that wasn’t even the end of the list.
Oblivious to the severity of Levina’s mind fracture, Laswell continued. “As someone who holds a high number of victims with him, he is now amongst the top target to prioritise. As of now, I am unable to tell you when an attack on him will be launched, but I will let you know once I can.”
Taking Levina’s silence as her shortage of things to add, Laswell dismissed her soon after.
Levina had one hand up on the wall as she walked away from the room. She was terrified that if she let go, there wouldn’t be anything to ground her into the real-world. But her suppressed bile had decided to come back and she couldn’t hold it in this time.
Disoriented as she ran towards the direction she was sure was to the nearest bathroom, she collided against something in full force and only stayed upright because a pair of hands held her shoulders firmly.
“Riven?”
She couldn’t even feel relieved at seeing the balaclava-clad man through her tears and weakly slapped at his arms to indicate that she wanted to be released. She’d voice it out but her lips were preoccupied with keeping shut so that the bile wouldn’t shoot up her throat, a task helped only by one hand covering her mouth securely.
Ghost did as she signalled and she wasted no time in dashing off, apologies and guilt in the back of her mind, leaving him staring after her disappearing figure in confused concern. He had seen the panic and grief crystal clear on her quivering figure which had immediately alarmed him. Never the person who others would seek out for consolation, however, he could only obey her silent request and before he knew it, she was gone. At a loss, he switched his target destination and walked back where he had come from, back into the dining hall again where his team was looking up at him in surprise.
“’Sup, Lt., you forgot sum’n?”
Shaking his head, he pointed his thumb towards the door.
“Riven- she uh… she was crying?”
Instantly, he had all of their full attention.
“What?!”
“Who-”
“Fuck, she must’ve talked to Laswell-” Now, that got his – and the others’ – attention. “where’d she-”
“The nearest bathroom from Laswell’s.”
A breeze, and the man was gone.
The three of them watched, stunned, as Price rushed out of the hall in record time. He hadn’t even bothered returning his tray, his primary concern set on Levina and all other thoughts pushed behind her.
“Should we…”
Gaz shook his head, regret crossing his features. “Price seemed to know what’s going on – we don’t. Might just make things worse if we show up.”
“Right.”
Sure, they’d seen Price move with agility – because despite his older age, he was a trained soldier – but those times were in the field and with his life on stake. Never, did they think, they’d ever see him move with such urgency for some girl unless it was an emergency. Except, it wasn’t just some girl in this case, was it?
Levina Riven had grown into their hearts, one way or another, and they genuinely loved the woman. A tribute to her name, she had struck Agustine out of the blue and torn down his empire from the top of his ranks – or at least, she was the reason for its current fall. The suddenness of her arrival in the form of her abrupt takeover of Agustine in his office that fateful day had gained her all their respects, which only continued to grow as they got to learn her character; her warmth, strength, and genuineness, among others. They couldn’t even begin to imagine what she had to go through in those seven months, dangling herself at the mercy – or lack thereof – of a heinous man. Yet, here she was, standing tall in the faces of her ghosts and conquering them one by one. It pinched at their hearts to know that she was currently suffering, but Gaz was right. If anything, they were glad that she had at least Price to confide in her troubles at the moment; he was a good man.
A good man who was presently clutching at his patience outside the ladies’ bathroom.
If he listened closely – mind you, his ears had years of training to pick up even the tiniest of sounds – he could hear heart-wrenching sobs echo from the door in front of him. Uncontrollable cries and sharp gasps continuously rained down from her and he could do nothing but listen as his heart shattered bit by bit. Fuck, he thought, she’ll come out when she’s ready.
But what if she wants someone right now?
She had no idea he was there so even if she did seek a comforting presence, she wouldn’t know that she had one right outside two sets of doors. That in mind, he brought a fist out and tapped it against the door hard enough for her to hear.
“Riven?!”
A pause in her weeping, only sniffles sounded. That meant that she had heard him.
“It’s John! I’m here if you need anything! Or- tell me to leave if you’d prefer that!”
He had missed the sound of her cubicle opening but he perked up at the sound of a tap running. Taking a step back so that he wouldn’t overwhelm Levina with his figure, her footsteps against the floor soon approached and the door opened slowly.
“John?”
The crack in her voice took his heart down with it.
“Oh, lov’ie- c’mere.”
His invitation brought around a fresh set of tears and he easily caught her when she rammed into his chest, her arms looping around his torso in seek of something to ground her.
Upon feeling one hand softly caressing her back and another gently running down her hair, the comfort that he brought had tugged on her vulnerability and she allowed herself to wail, unrestrained, in the safety of his arms. His scent, smoky and woody, hazed over her mind soothingly, quelling the horrific thoughts that had taken advantage of her solitude and had ambushed her.
“I’m sorry, Aurora- ‘m so sorry-”
“Shh, not your fault, love. She knows it’s not your fault.”
Levina shook her head, her memories haunting her relentlessly. “I’m a monster- Grace, I let him touch me!”
“Hey- hey, now. Look at me, lov’ie.”
She pulled back only enough so that she could face him. “There you are – not a monster, no.”
“But-”
He shook his head resolutely. His hand moved from her hair to cradle her cheek delicately, thumb wiping away her tears as they fell.
“All I see is a strong woman, heart full of love and so, so beautiful. A force to be reckoned with; someone who has gone through so much because she was determined to save her sister.”
The tenderness in his tone was reflected in his eyes. She could feel his conviction that was entwined into the blue, his secure belief in his soft words.
“A devoted daughter whose parents are beyond proud of. A person whom we all love and care for because she deserves it – deserves to be loved and appreciated for all the good that she’s done selflessly.”
And she’s crying again, now for a different reason.
Her hands clutched the back of his shirt tightly as she searched his face of any hint of lies – of wavering confidence – and finding not even one speck of it in his entire being. She buried her face into his shoulder, heart full of love – true to his words – and gratitude for the man.
“Grace, John. You can’t just say that so- so confidently like that!”
His shoulders shook when he let out a light laugh. “I only say it because it’s true, love. Wouldn’t have said it if I wasn’t sure even a tad.”
She felt him drop a kiss on top of her head and she tightened her arms around him. His confession of what he thought of her had taken her breath away, rendering her speechless as thoughts of him filled her with endless affirmations that she was a good person – someone deserving of love because she loved.
She loved her sister and she had done what she could to bring her home. There was nothing she could do to rectify the entire ordeal, their fates had been sealed that day of the home invasion, but she could try now – and try, she would, to the best of her ability. Aurora would come home, she would make sure of it.
Unbothered by her lack of words, John simply held her right then, right there. His hands never stopped their reassuring caress as he patiently waited for her sniffles to die down to a steady breath. Grace, she loved this man.
Unkeen to show up in the dining hall in her state, John led her to his office instead. His hand fixed itself onto the small of her back, not forceful but steadying. The plan had been to let her rest in his office while he went and grabbed her something from lunch – anything more filling than the energy bar he had in his desk – but that flew out the window when they spotted three figures stood outside his door with two sets of wrapped sandwiches in the hands of one of them.
“Guys?”
Upon hearing Levina’s voice, their kicked-puppy expressions lit up as their heads turned to regard the approaching pair.
“Riv! And Cap.”
John huffed at the too-serious-to-be-sincere tone of disappointment Soap had used when addressing him. Though, with the way that had earned a giggle from the woman beside him, he’d let Soap off any day.
“Sorry I ran off on you earlier, Ghost. In my defence, I really did have to puke.”
“No harm, glad you’re a’ight now.”
She didn’t miss the worry that crossed their expressions and gave them what she hoped was a reassuring smile.
Everyone entered the office once John had unlocked it, spreading around on the two couches facing each other that were separated by a wooden coffee table. She ended up in between Gaz and John, the latter on her right, and opposite Ghost and Soap, sandwich in hand. Figuring Ghost must have told the others of her earlier state, and hence, how John had known where she was, she decided to clear the air to ease them of their anxieties.
They listened attentively as she shared her sister’s current situation, how that had been her drive behind her long-con, and her belief that she was still alive based on what she had heard in Agustine’s meetings, however passing the remarks about her sister were. The boys shared their sympathies, cursing Agustine out and assuring her that her sister would come home. Their support touched her and John’s words repeated in her head.
A person whom we all love and care for because she deserves it.
They let the pair eat – because John had unceremoniously left lunch mid-way – while they began conversing about anything and everything. Recognising that she had had a rough day though, the trio left the pair to unwind. Unbeknownst to them, Soap had been about to naively question as to why Levina was staying at John’s but a quick pinch to his side from Ghost had shut him up quick.
It was a new venture, their flourishing relationship, and they silently agreed to keep matters private for the meantime as they endeavoured to see where it would take them. So, it was only when the door had shut after the boys that she allowed herself to inch closer to John, his arm instantly going around her back to hold her by her waist as she leaned against his side, head falling onto his shoulder. Her arms went to loop around him in a side-hug and she felt him tug her closer to plant his lips on her head, before resting his head on hers.
“She would’ve liked to meet you and the others. My mum, I mean.”
Her voice was low to match the serenity between them, fondness discernible in her words. Inevitably, her thoughts had fallen onto her mother whose life had been taken away too early – unfairly – by the hands of the home invaders who had taken away Aurora.
“Yeah? Would’ve loved to meet her too. Thank her for having raised an absolute dear.”
She hummed a pleased sigh, confession at the tip of her tongue. “We bonded over our love for love, growing up. H’ve always dreamt of falling in love, but mum made it hard because she’d always say, “they won’t deserve you, not until they’ve built you a fire that doesn’t consume, but gives”. Never knew what she meant until I’ve found one that gave me peace; gave me safety, comfort.”
His hand tightened its hold on her waist. “Someone’s built you one?”
She hummed, affirmative, lifting her head up to meet his eyes – the blue that had intensified under the utter adoration written over them.
“He’s been tending to it every morning.”
Fondness brought his lips up into a tender smile. He leaned in, slowly to give her time to react, and placed his lips onto hers in a soft touch. Their eyes fell shut for that brief moment. She felt his hand brush away her hair before cradling her face to hold her head steady when he pressed forward, pouring his affections into the kiss, before pulling away.
“I’d build you a home with a massive hearth to go with it too.”
She was certain that her eyes were shining with unbridled love, but she didn’t mind it for there was reciprocity in his eyes. “’m no good with architecture, but I’d at least give you a hand somehow.”
“So long as you’re there, love. I’d make sure the place is big enough to host the boys too. ‘nd your dad and sister.”
Grace, he knew her heart so well. “Family nights with everyone.”
“Mhm. Then there’re nights for the both of us.”
“I’d love that. W’d love everything about it; the hearth, the size… you.”
“Yeah?”
“Mhm.”
The quietness – the peace. The domesticity of it all had been gradually lulling her to sleep. Her enervation fogged her brain, but she still had enough clarity to express her psyche truthfully. A content hum vibrated from her throat, like a cat purring under the affection it received, successfully tempting John to pet her head gingerly and further pulling her into unconsciousness. She blinked her eyes open, unsure when she had even closed them in the first place, and laid her feelings bare for John to see.
“Love you.”
His eyes glinted. He detected no inkling of deception in her words nor soul, and he could feel her emotions flow out of her to envelop him comfortably. His answer was clear – inherent in his mind, soul, and body – and nothing could stop him from conveying it to the one who had struck him with so, so much yearning. Levina was a once-in-a-lifetime wonder and he would hold onto her for as long as she allowed him to.
“I love you, too.”
She fell asleep not long after that, the warmth of her partner cozying her to dreamland. Blurry images of an unfamiliar interior accompanied by the distinct figures of her loved ones brought her an abundant of joy and she swore to turn it into a real-life memory one day.
A gentle stroke of her hair and a call of her name stirred her out of sleep. The dream-induced happiness was still present and when her bleary gaze fell onto John, she realised that that artificial happiness would never measure up to the genuine one that he sparked in her.
“Dinnertime, lov’ie. You up for that?”
She gave an affirmative hum and sat up – John must have laid her on the couch while she was asleep – stretching out her limbs to further bring herself awake. The admiration in John’s eyes, as he looked up at her from where he was crouched in front of the couch, knocked the breath out of her lungs and she could just feel the love, love, love swirling giddily in her.
Unable to resist her desires, she reached out to hold him by the juncture of his neck and head and leaned in to press a chaste kiss on his lips. He grabbed onto one of her hands and held it securely in his. Their hands remained clasped even as they made their way out of his office, only separating at the first sight of someone else. It was a mutual decision to do so, and she didn’t mind it – too much – because she valued her privacy for now.
The others were already in the dining hall by the time the couple got there. Relief washed over them at her well-rested appearance and the little smile playing on her lips, no doubt an effect of being with their captain. The pair seemed to almost glow in the presence of each other and the boys were glad that they had found each other.
After leaving Levina with John earlier, in the privacy of Ghost’s office, they were unconstrained in talking about the pair of lovebirds – all in good heart. They hadn’t missed the lovelorn eyes they would send each other when one wasn’t looking and, after realising just how bad her break down must have been upon learning the reason behind it, knowing that John had managed to bring her back to safety had confirmed their hypothesis.
Dinner that evening felt even more homely to Levina. Constant validation from John had turned on a new light to view herself and her boys – her additional family. She was loved and she deserved it, John’s words looped around her head, she was a good person and she loved with all her heart. She was more than her beauty – it was her heart’s beauty that made her who she was. No more pretences needed, she was safe and sound. Not broken.
With her newfound strength, the days seemed to pass by indistinctively. Most of her time was, of course, spent training under Lieutenant Mordell. She had her moments of rest from dinner until breakfast, finding refuge in the boys. It was soon the last day of her training where Mordell would have her run through every drill under his close watch. The day had started with waking up from a dreamless sleep, a warm shower to ease her nerves, and John.
They had met with a kiss as he handed over her cup of tea, before settling themselves into their usual position where Levina had her legs up and folded to the side with one arm looping round John’s back as she leaned into his side, his arm also rounding her back to hold her close by the waist. It was winter now but that didn’t stop them from putting on layers to battle against the cold.
“How’re you feeling today?”
She gave a hum, thinking over her words as she picked through her nerves. “Nervous- very. But I’ve also seen more approving nods from Lieutenant Mordell in the past week than ever, so I think I’ll do fine.”
“Mhm, ‘course you will. Ghost also has high hopes for you and you know he doesn’t give them out easily. You’ll do wonderful, love.”
Snuggling further into him, she breathed in his woody scent, feeling it soothe over her skin. His words tickled her heart and she allowed her flames to travel through her body to alleviate her burdens.
His confidence in her didn’t end there, however, and she found herself flushing lightly during breakfast as she stared at the unfamiliar soldier who had entered the dining hall with a bouquet in his arms.
“Delivery for one ‘Levina Riven’ from-” he squinted his eyes at the tag connected to the wrappings “-‘your Firestarter’?!”
So that was why John had decided to stay for breakfast.
The room had quietened down at the man’s exclamation and she could feel multiple eyes on her. Her blush clear on her cheeks, she avoided meeting anyone’s eyes as she got up from her seat to beeline straight to the man stood in front of the door. Hushed whispers gradually grew louder to a normal volume. Though, she could tell that some of the topics of conversations were centred around her. Exchanging a word of thanks with the deliverer, she carefully took hold of the bouquet and rushed back to her seat with the boys. She cleared her throat as she sat back down, trying to regain her composure but to no avail when she locked eyes with John.
The sweet smile playing on his lips were enough to still the world around them. She barely registered Gaz leaning over to catch a glimpse of the bouquet with a question directed at her. The outer corner of John’s eyes crinkled as he watched her every reaction, harsh lines softening his features that she wanted to trace with her fingertips – or lips – so badly. His eyes gleamed with pride at having caught her off-guard, gratified to see the warmth to her cheeks matching the pink Astilbes that stood tall amongst the Siberian Squills and yellow Peonies in her bouquet.
He nudged his head in the direction of her left, amusement radiating off of him. Levina turned, only to be met with Gaz’s teasing grin. It was then that she remembered that he had asked her something and she had yet to reply. A sheepish smile made its way to her lips, “sorry, what was that?”
“He asked if you’ve gone deaf.”
Soap proceeded to yelp when Ghost ruthlessly slapped him at the back of his head.
Gaz shook his head and nodded to the bouquet in her arms. “What’d he get you?”
“Oh,” her eyes flickered around the pastel palette, “uhh… I think these ones’re peonies?”
Helpless at identifying the flowers, she looked to John whose smile had not faltered the slightest. He gave an airy chuckle at her lost expression and fought the urge to lean over for a kiss when she pouted at him. One by one, he named the flowers and gave a short explanation for each of their meanings.
Patience, “I will be waiting for you”. Hope and perseverance. Good luck.
The boys’ crooning filled her ears but her mind was fully entranced by her sight and John’s echoed voice.
The Siberian Squills encouraged her to stay strong – that it would all go well in time, so long as she kept her spirits. The best wishes he conveyed through the yellow Peonies were charming. It reminded her of the breathtaking kiss that he had given her earlier this morning – a ‘good luck’ kiss, he had said. The pink Astilbes; they’ve long revealed their thoughts on one another, so what could he be waiting for? They’ve yet to unclothe each other so, perhaps it could be about that? But, no; she understood him enough to know that he wouldn’t display that patience out of the blue – he would never risk an impression that would pressure her to bare her body like that, not after what she had gone through.
The other two flower types had something to do with their jobs; that she’d get her sister back in due time and that she’ll manage today’s intensive training’s final inspection well. And then what? Once she had passed that, she’ll be given assignments to complete, and she can’t do that if she didn’t have a team. The decision as to where she would end up all depended on who wanted her, which captain-
Oh?
Captain John Price.
John was a captain.
She had long forgone calling him ‘Captain’ unless someone else, bar her boys, was present that she’d forgotten he was one. Stories of Captain Price were commonly regulated around the compound; tales regaling his competence, his unfailing capability, the long list of his accomplishments. She had heard others share their desires to operate under his orders – that he was a famously sought-after man in the Army. The Captain Price who led TF141 with dignity.
The John Price who loved her, and she, him.
Her John.
Surely he hadn’t meant-
Her hands paused in its subconscious brushing of the petals as she lifted her head. His eyes were already on her – Grace, did he even look away once? – and he raised an eyebrow in question when he registered the uncertain surprise on her face. Right, she thought, he can’t read minds.
Shaking her head to get rid of her theories – because she’ll know the outcome of her team appointment in the coming days anyway – she gave him an appreciative smile that she hoped had passed along the emotions from the bottom of her heart. Her mind began to wander as to where she might find a vase in the station as she laid her eyes on the blooming buds again, her fingers moving from petals to petals to feel the smooth texture as the non-imposing fragrance wafted over her nose.
The final inspection went great. Though, she had been surprised by the existence of an audience at every station of the drills. Apparently, the newbies’ trainer had given the men some time off that day and had told them of the occurrence of her drills.
“Told ‘em I’d be testing a returning veteran on her foundations,” Mordell had told her when she had first spotted the fresh faces surveying her, “guess they wanted to see an example of what they could be by the end of their newbie training.”
Oh, the subtle but heavy pressure he had placed on her shoulders.
But that went alright!
The boys had given her a round of congratulations when they met again at dinnertime. Finally the end of eight continuous weeks of maximum effort, the boys had promised to treat her to a night of drinks that weekend. John had then walked her back to her room and had left her breathing heavily in front of her closed door with a heated kiss.
Thank Grace, he had left before she entered her room because the other girls had been in and, judging by their knowing grins, they had a fairly good idea what had caused her face to flush. They didn’t pry though, only voicing out their light-hearted envy at the vase of flowers that she had decided would suit the room – the girls had agreed too.
Then, she had woken up to snowfall.
Standing at the doorway to the barracks, she reached a hand out to catch the snow with her ungloved palm. Mesmerised by the glittering flakes, and assured with the belief that the only other person who would see her then would be John, she hadn’t heard his footsteps approach behind her and startled slightly when she heard his gruff voice and felt a pair of hands reaching for her waist.
“You’ll catch a cold, love.”
Pivoting on the spot, her face lit up and John was quick to give her a peck on her lips. She took her cup from him and let the warmth fuel her blood when she took a sip.
“Mm, it’s pretty though.”
Upon her revelation that she wanted to watch the snowing sky, he turned her back around and stepped in so that she had her back flush against his chest and wrapped his arms around her midriff, thereupon she could enjoy the sight while still having him pressed up against her.
She felt dizzy knowing that John would satisfy her requests without question.
They shared their plans for the day. Due to the weather showing no signs of stoppage, schedules had been halted and plans were limited to indoor activities. Coincidentally, the times they had set aside for the gym had intersected and oh, how torturous of a time it had been for the both of them.
The immense size of the gym had not – could not – stop their eyes from wandering.
They worked on themselves separately and there was a considerable amount of distance between them even as they moved from one machinery to the other. Once they had a set going on, their focus rendered them oblivious to the world and it just so happened that when one of them were deep into their workout, the other would be resting. Hence, they had not even noticed each other eyeing them up with need burning in the other’s gaze.
Each had their own ardent tension plaguing their minds that evening, and it all came to a head the next day, where they had shared a fervid moment that morning that only teased them with what was to come that night.
It was a Saturday morning – the weekend night out with the boys was to happen that night. The couple had found themselves in the same position as the morning prior, except it wasn’t snowing. The dawn air was chilly enough to avoid though, so they stayed indoors and only gazed out the window.
Or, at least, Levina was doing that while John had his face buried into the juncture of her neck.
Their individual tensions, brought over from the other day, had coalesced into a palpable haze dancing around them. Unwilling to let it cloud his mind, John allowed himself to only pepper her skin with lingering kisses, unaware of the effect he was making on her. When he had unknowingly nudged on a sensitive area near her pulse point, she accidentally let a whimper escape her throat and it was only then that he paused. Having mistaken the noise as a sound of protest in his panic, a string of apologies immediately left his lips as he lifted his head up, only to stop abruptly when his breath got caught in his throat upon seeing her face.
Levina had been worrying her lower lip with her teeth in an attempt to suppress the noises she had been wanting to make ever since John had started his ministration on her neck. That had given her a naturally pouty lip that only brought upon chaos in John’s mind. Her cheeks were tinted pink from the cool air and the heat of his touch, his scent – him. And then, there were her eyes that had rendered his brain static; his thoughts only on her and her alone.
Having to look up at him due to their heights, her eyes opened rather widely and he could nearly see his reflection if he tried hard enough. Her eyelash batted at him innocently, a far cry from the thoughts running uncontrollably in her mind; the thoughts that she was sure he could get a read on by the look in her eyes. They were almost teary, shining in the dim lights of the barracks and the subtle glow of the waking sun. Her desire was clearly written on them, with a hint of plead for him to cease his teasing kisses and to do something-
And who was he to deny her needs?
It was a miracle that his coffee didn’t spill over with how fast he had been in swooping down and capturing her lips. Surprised by his fervour but beyond pleased with it, a reflexive moan echoed from her throat which he eagerly swallowed down. She adjusted herself to face her body towards him and brought her unoccupied hand up to tangle itself in his hair. His arms around her waist tightened their hold and pulled her closer towards him – he had to rapidly calm himself down once he felt her clothed breasts press up against him.
Their tongues met in a messy dance. Breaths were exchanged with a rush of hot air, the occasional sighs adding into the mix. His hand roamed her back, up her spine to her nape, where he held her head steady as he pulled back slightly. Her whine at the loss of his lips promptly turned into a gasp when he attacked her neck instead. But unlike the earlier pecks he planted throughout her skin, he went straight to the spot that had elicited a whimper out of her and bit into it lightly. To allay the – pleasurable – pain, he proceeded to lick and suckle at her skin, drawing out mewls after mewls from her. He tasked himself to locate as many of her sweet spots as he could, up her neck and down to her shoulders.
“Oh, John…”
The breathy tone of her voice calling out to his name earned her a groan out of the man. As if that wasn’t enough to heat her up, his assault on her skin had ramped up a notch and she found herself putty in his arms. Grace, she would just have to change her underwear later with how damp she could feel herself get. He had also given her enough material to reminisce tonight when she would have to relieve herself of her lust; from the way his eyes had darkened when he had noticed just how desperate he had made her, to the stiffness she could feel prodding into her thigh.
Honing into the area that she seemed the most responsive to yet, he nipped at it mercilessly.
“Ah- h-”
He soothed the reddened patch with kitten licks, giving a final wet kiss onto it before he lifted his head up to plant a chaste kiss on her lips. His eyes strayed to the ruined state of her neck and collarbones, appreciating the cherry marks scattering the expanse of her exposed skin, then to her debauched face – watery eyes, flushed cheeks, kiss-bitten lips, and lust all over her expression.
“Fuck, love. Y’look so pretty all ruined like this.”
Her lips curled up at his compliment, a personification of seductive in her smile and breathless voice. “Yeah? Wanna look pretty for you.”
“Shit-” she was going to be the death of him. He returned to his lips onto hers and muttered in between kisses, “ always so pretty for me, love. So good f’me.”
She hummed, content and in bliss.
They both knew that they had a time limit – and despised it. That in mind, they forcefully slowed down to innocent – not really – kisses accompanied by praises shared under their breaths. They had to excuse themselves to their bathrooms before the barracks came alive lest someone walked in on their dishevelled state; John, to alleviate himself of the pressure in his pants, and Levina, to conceal the marks that remained exposed despite her jacket – except, she had missed one and had to enlist her bunk-mate’s help when the latter had pointed it out with a teasing grin. Bless her heart, her roommate had not asked any questions.
The rest of the day went as planned. The boys and Levina had lunch at the compound before they all left with permissions from the signed short-leave form for the day. The five of them occupied John’s car as he had volunteered to be the driver for the day, who then gave everyone a ride to their respective places to spend the rest of the day before they would reconvene in the evening. Levina’s place had been the second nearest so she alighted the car once it stopped in front of her apartment.
“Text me when you’re leaving, hm?”
John had rolled down his window and she turned to him, momentarily stupefied by the sight of him with one hand on the steering wheel and a casual arm draped over the window. She gave an affirmative hum as she flicked her eyes back from the muscles enhancing his arm to his eyes, which twinkled upon having caught her gawking at him.
She gave him a sheepish smile, “drive safe, love.”
“Will do.”
Ignoring the two other men in the car – they already knew of their relationship even without having to tell them – she leaned down and gave John a peck on his lips.
“See you tonight.”
Leaving him with her whisper chiming in his head, she walked up the path to the building and accessed the front door with her key card. She gave her dad a hug once she made it to her unit and leaned against the kitchen counter as she waited for the kettle to boil.
“He drove you here then, your John?”
“Mhm. Dropped Soap off first, then, it was me. Ghost and Gaz are next.”
“Driving you back later? After the pub?”
“Yep! He won’t be drinking, so you can relax, dad.”
She grinned knowingly when he gave an approving nod as he considered her words, muttering something about John being a responsible man.
Never one to judge her love life, she had no qualms in telling her dad over the phone about John the day after the couple had gotten together. Her sister’s circumstances still confidential, she could only cite that previous day as a ‘particularly hard time’ to her dad and shared with him how John had managed to get her back on her feet. How he had chosen to comfort her over finishing his lunch, the way he had not held back from confessing his true thoughts of her – unlike the boys in high school who avoided doing that in fear of their broken masculinity – and the safety and love that his fire gave her, just like her mother had always said.
Her dad had consoled her when tears had threatened to escape as she remembered that day, and he had voiced out his gratitude for John after all that she had told him. But dad would, of course, always be dad, and he was undoubtedly protective of his daughter. Though, knowing how happy John made her, her dad’s worries were at least somewhat assuaged.
They spent the afternoon talking in the living room until she had to prepare for the night out. This being the first time she could have an extended rest since her intensive training had started, she was determined to pamper herself.
One long shower later, she had her hair up in a towel-twist and she was sat in her vanity, delicately putting on her makeup. Having spent most of her teenage and adult years in the military meant that makeups were a rare treat so she stuck to the style that she knew and only accentuated her features with cosmetics – and to cover the marks on her neck. Then, it was her hair’s turn to focus on and she dedicated enough time to style the wolf cut properly instead of leaving it up to the permed waves to do its job. By the end of it all, she applauded herself on a job well done as she stared at herself in the mirror.
The Evil Queen could never, she thought.
After mulling it over for a while – more time than she should, really – she picked out a black semi-sweetheart tube top to go with a pair of jeans, and a black jacket over it to shelter her from the cold. Spraying her perfume once she managed to zip the curve-defining top up, she grabbed her purse to pack the things she might need. Aside from the necessities, she brought her travel-sized makeup products in case she wanted to touch up her face and then a thought crossed her mind. Glancing at her mirror, she surveyed her collarbone area where she knew John’s marks laid. She would rather keep it hidden from her dad when she had to see him later, but John?
…so pretty all ruined like this.
Her cheeks flushed lightly at the low voice echoing in her mind. Right, she thought, that was a decision made for her. She fitted a small bottle of makeup remover and a couple of cotton pads to go with it into her purse and searched for her phone for the time. Not late, plenty of time. Though, as she scrolled through her notifications, some of the boys were beginning to leave so she might as well. Giving herself a final once over in the mirror, she grabbed her selected heels for the night and exited her room.
“Look at you! You look gorgeous, sweetheart!”
She grinned at her dad and pecked his cheeks in thanks. Ordering herself a ride, she bid her father goodnight and went downstairs to wait for its arrival. Once she was on her way, she sent a quick message to the others and shared her location upon Ghost’s demand. It was a silent ride and she gave her thanks to the driver when they made it to their location.
She aimed straight for the semi-circular booth at the far left-hand corner where John had saved a table for them and spotted him and Soap already there. Their senses sharp, they had noticed her approaching and Soap sent her a wave.
“Lev!”
“Hey Soap! John,” she gave the latter a greeting kiss after she had entered the booth to take her place next to him. His arm immediately slithered past her back to hold her waist securely.
“You look stunning, love.”
“Yeah? So do you, John,” she glanced down to his chest where she could see his shirt hugging his muscles and involuntarily bit her lip. “You look good.”
His hand gripped her waist tighter and she knew her gawping had been caught red-handed. She feigned innocence and returned his heavy gaze with a sweet smile before turning to look at the other occupant at the table, trying to ignore the heat in her gut that had been ignited.
Ghost and Gaz arrived soon after and the first round of drinks went by in a flash. Conversations were had, laughs were shared, and playful debates were brought up. When Gaz had gone to the bar to get them more drinks, Levina excused herself to ‘touch up her makeup’.
In the bathroom, she wiped the stretch of her neck clean of products and reapplied her lipstick, taking her jacket off too seeing as it was rather warm indoors. Once she was satisfied, she re-entered the pub just as Soap walked past her towards the men’s bathroom. He gave a low whistle when he caught sight of the marks and she shot him a proud grin.
“Look at you! Poor lass got herself mauled by a beast!”
He then assured her that he would give them more time alone than the bathroom needs him – Ghost had gone ahead to help Gaz with bringing the drinks over – giving her a high-five for the fun of it. His positive reaction had fuelled her confidence even more and she let herself saunter up to the booth. It was only when she was close enough could John make out the marks littering her skin in the glow of the lights.
“Fuck.”
John already had trouble keeping his eyes away from her exposed skin ever since she had first walked into the pub, only for her to expose more and reveal the evidence of his claim on her.
Grace, the tease.
His eyes dipped to her neckline and spanned across her bare collar, tracing each fading mark up her shoulders to her neck. He readily reached an arm out to pull her closer by her hips when she made to sit next to him, his other hand going up to trail his fingers over the pink skin. The marks that he had made on her – his marks.
His Levina.
He finally looked up to meet her eyes and nearly groaned upon seeing the pride and confidence in them. “Shit, love. D’you like ‘em that much?”
She rested her arms on his shoulders and linked her hands behind him, keeping him from straying away – not that he ever would. She hummed, the sound tantalising to his ears.
“Very. Do you not like them?”
The obvious pouty tone to her words allured him and his lips were on hers before he knew it. The muffled whimper she made went straight to his lap and he had to resist the need to have her on top of him at that moment. Pulling away slightly, distantly aware that they were very much in public, he managed to make out his words in a gruff.
“Course I do, lov’ie. So much so, I’m tempted to give you more now.”
She giggled when his lips slipped downwards and began kissing her chin, down to the neck. “Can’t do, John. The others’ll be here soon.”
This time, he did groan into her neck, frustrated at the cockblock.
She pulled his head out of the juncture below her ears and gazed deeply into his eyes, her next word full of promises and yearning.
“Later.”
There was no hint of hesitancy in her tone nor expression. She had only had a mocktail thus far and had another glass of juice coming up so they both knew she was clear-headed. The heavy desire running through her bones showed in her eyes and John knew he was fucked.
The boys then came in to break their staring contest, teases at the tip of their tongues. John only grunted in response though, brain too frazzled to think of a comeback when Levina had her hand resting on his thigh dangerously.
They nursed themselves to two more rounds of drinks before they had to call it a night when Soap wouldn’t stop singing into their ears and the topics of their talks gradually became sadder and sadder. They also had to suddenly pull Ghost back – all hands on deck – when he almost walked straight into the glass door without any indication of opening it.
The car was blanketed in a comfortable silence during the ride back to base. Three of them had alcohol buzzing in their blood, enough to render them serene and, in Gaz’s case, knocked out. The fully-conscious pair helped them into the barracks where they then insisted that they would be fine alone.
“We’re not gon’ leave you blue-balled no more. ‘ve a safe sex, lass, Cap’n.” Soap had whispered, or at least tried to. It came out more like a series of hushed gibberish.
That had pulled out a shy grin from Levina and a sigh from John. Only when the boys had turned around the corner did the couple look to each other.
He closed the distance between them and brushed her hair away from her face, taking in her patient smile with one of his own. “You sure about this?” She hummed affirmatively and was about to nod when his hold on her chin stopped her. “Words, darling.”
His assertive tone had her biting her lip as she shyly blinked up at him. “Yes, John. Want you to have me,” Her hand trailed up to hold his cheek, feeling the rough scratch of his beard on her palm, “as much ‘s I want to have you.”
“You have me, love. Always have.”
He surged in to plant a short, but heavy, kiss on her lips. “Shall we?”
She hummed again but paused when she remembered his words, “yes, please.”
With an arm wrapped around her back, he led her towards his room.
His room was quaint. It was evident that John tended to spend more time in his office than his bedroom when her eyes fell on the neat stacks of papers decorating his desk. Otherwise, the place lacked any notable decorations and was simply very John.
How charming, she thought fondly.
His eyes were already on hers when she turned back to him. As if he could guess her thoughts, his eyes softened and he tugged her to his chest, her arms going around his neck to stabilise herself. He dipped his head low to meet her lips softly and she couldn’t help but smile into the kiss at his tenderness.
She pressed forward and tilted her head to deepen the kiss and he followed suit. His hands wandered upwards to her shoulders where he grabbed hold of her jacket. Receiving his hint, she shrugged off the garb and let him toss it aside in the vague direction of his chair – it ended up on the floor and she breathed out a laugh when the thump sounded. A shiver coursed through her at the feel of his wandering hands before his lips parted from hers to start leaving kisses down to her shoulders instead. He paved a path of light kisses connecting the old marks, then, up to her ears where he whispered for her to, “jump.”
Her trust in him unwavering, she obeyed his request straight away and wrapped her legs around his hips just as his hands caught her by her thighs without as much as a grunt. Their lips met again, more heated this time, as he brought them to the edge of his bed to lay her gently onto the sheets. Her breaths hitched when his lips began to nip onto the uncharted territory, that was her sternum, while his hands moved up and back to feel out for her zipper. His movements as he unzipped her top was slow, always giving her the silent opportunity to stop him in case she changed her mind. His consideration struck her heart with more affection and she lifted his head up to give him a short giggly kiss of gratitude. That brought a fond smile out of the man, his endearment for her growing upon seeing her joy.
Finally, the zipper unlatched and he pulled the top off of her body, adding it onto the growing pile without taking his eyes away from her. The darkening of his gaze as he studied her body with the intention of etching it onto his brain only added fuel to the fire in her gut and she couldn’t help but let out a whine when he made no move to touch her.
“Hm?” Understanding her wordless cue, his hands moved up from her clothed hips to map out her bare skin. Up her waist, in towards her stomach, up again to catch her breasts in both hands. A gasp left her when he thumbed her nipples gingerly and the first moan of the night, in a series of many. escaped her when he pinched them harshly, just a touch away from pain. “’s this what you wanted, sweetheart?”
“Yes, please…”
The breathy tone of her voice aroused him further and he leaned in to place a kiss on her chest. “Y’don’t need to worry, sweetheart. ‘m gonna take care of you.”
Another kiss onto her breast, “my pretty girl.”
One more, nearer to her bundle of nerves, “so beautiful.”
She could feel his beard tickle her bud this time, “fuck, the things you do to me.” And then he took one nub in his mouth.
A broken moan sounded from her as he swirled, flicked, and pressed his tongue against her nipple, his hand coming up to mimic the actions on her other breast. She keened when he sucked on it lightly and she subconsciously pushed his head closer to her chest.
“Jo-hn-”
He hummed in acknowledgement without pausing in his movements. Switching to latch onto the other breast, the cool air hitting her wet bud as his fingers toyed with it alongside his mouth playing with the other sent a rough wave of pleasure to her cunt and she felt herself gush before she knew it, her eyes crossing involuntarily. “Fuck!”
With the way her legs twitched around his hips in the aftershock of her mini-orgasm, it was unavoidable that he realised what had just occurred. He let go of her nub with a wet pop and grinned at her in wonder. “Did you just cum, sweetheart?”
A flush made its way to her cheeks and she smiled sheepishly. “I think so? ‘s never happened before.”
“Fuck, love. That’s hot.”
He recaptured her lips with speed while his hands drifted to her hips to undo her jeans, hooking his fingers into her bottom garments to tug it down her legs. She lifted her hips up to aid in his task and let him discard her pants and underwear at once, leaving her completely nude under his touch.
Separating himself from her, he got down on his knees and brought her legs up onto his shoulder to plant kisses up her calf to her thigh. He then pushed her thighs open wider which prompted her to lift her legs up to plant her feet on the edge of the bed comfortably, thus, exposing her glistening cunt to his hungry eyes.
He traced a finger up her slit, gathering her dampness up to her clit which he pressed gently before rubbing it in tight circles. Listening to her trembling breaths for any indication of her pleasure, he stopped his ministrations and, instead, prodded her entrance with his middle finger. Considering her state, it slipped in with ease and he added in another finger after a few thrusts. Feeling the stretch, little slips of moans left her throat which quickly turned into a mewl when he curled his fingers upwards. Once he had found her sweet spot, he massaged it gently to pull out more noises from her. Only the best for his lover, doubtlessly, he leaned in to flick his tongue against her swollen clit. Taken by surprise for her eyes were currently closed, an unrestrained moan echoed in the room when his lips engulfed her clit to administer similar movements as he had done to her nipples earlier.
The lewd sounds as he lapped and sucked on her only fogged their minds in more lust. With the desperate and earnest attention he gave her clit while his fingers pumped in and out and curled against her sweet spot, it didn’t take long for her to feel another orgasm approach.
“John! ‘m gonna cum- ha-”
She didn’t even know that his actions could get any more intense but he managed it somehow. The coil in her guts tightened harshly before, all at once, it loosened up and unravelled, sending waves upon waves of pleasure through her body. His name left the tip of her tongue as her eyes rolled back reflexively, her hands clenching the bedsheet underneath her tightly and her legs stiffening in place as he guided her in riding out her orgasm. The pleasure eventually became too much and her hands flew to his head to push it away from her sensitive nerves. His fingers slowed down its thrusts into an eventual stop and he pulled them out as he rose from his knees to level his head above hers.
He allowed a moment to admire the sight of her post-orgasmic state; eyes gleaming with unshed tears and lips parted as she panted for air. Giving her space to catch her breath, he kissed her down her neck appreciatively, only returning to her lips once her breaths had evened out slightly.
“Mm, you did so good for me, love. My good girl, hm?”
“Yours…” She gave a satisfied hum, tasting her sweet tang on his tongue.
Her hands went under his shirt to get a feel for his muscles and he pulled away briefly to take off the clothing. She tracked her fingers all around his torso, pressing into his flesh lightly as she memorised each section of stiff muscles and soft fats that formed his body that she loved so much. The awe in her expression as she eyed his body gave him more confidence than he knew what to do with, choosing to take this opportunity to shed off the rest of his clothes instead. She zealously drank in the sight of him in all his glory, her eyes falling onto his hand stroking his length languidly.
He pulled her closer to the edge of the bed and she lifted her upper body up, resting on her propped-up elbow behind her. Reaching in between them, she wrapped a hand around his girth, biting her lips upon feeling the angry veins running across his skin as she caressed him up and down. The sound of his breath hitching brought her eyes back to his and she was shameless in conveying her need through her stare. Unable to resist her allure, he rested an arm on the bed and caught her lips in a feverish kiss, leaving them breathless when he asked, “condom?”
She shook her head. “IUD. And clean. You?”
“Clean.”
The teasing grin on her lips was as bewitching as any and her eyes seemed to gleam under the lights. As she swiped her thumb over the tip of his cock, she invited, “have me, John. ‘m yours.”
“Yeah? You’ve got me, too, lov’ie- fuck,” he grunted when she squeezed her hand around the head as she pumped him shallowly, drawing out a bead of precum which she proceeded to smear over him. Decidedly not enough lubricant, she angled him down to rub the head against her slit, gasping when it caught onto her clit. He aligned his hips with hers for ease and moved it so that he was rubbing his length against her cunt, covering himself in her slick and priding himself in the little breathless moans she made. Once he paused in his movements, she took the chance to line up his cock against her cunt, meeting his eyes with so much certainty that he didn’t hesitate in pushing in slightly.
She whimpered when the head slipped in without resistance and watched the concern flicker in his eyes the more he filled her. He paused when she took a sharp inhale halfway in and opted instead to pull back slightly before thrusting forward in slow shallow thrusts. That helped her adjust to his size and he had her moaning softly soon enough. With every thrust, he slipped further in, bit by bit, as her sweet noises grew in volume along with his low grunts.
“Please…”
“Hm? What d’you need, sweetheart?”
Her voice was desirous, a reflection of her expression, as she whimpered out, “more, please.” At the last bit of length yet to enter her, he did as she pleaded and pushed forwards with force so that her hips were flush against his. “Oh, fu- hah-”
He gave her a moment of recess before starting out his thrusts at a faster rate, groaning at her tightness clenching down on him. Her hands searched for purchase in the sheets below her and he gave her right hand his left to hold onto instead, intertwining their fingers and letting her grip onto it as hard as she wanted.
The obscene squelch every time he drove into her had him looking down where their bodies met and he nearly moaned at the filthy sight of the white rings and streaks of fluid decorating his cock as her juices spilled onto the floor excessively. “Shit, love. You’re dripping. Creaming all over me, too.” She gave a whine, as if embarrassed, but he knew better. “So fucking wet for me, hm?”
Nodding, she glanced down to see his length covered in white liquid – her juices – and fuck, wasn’t that such an arousing sight? “Mm- ha… ‘s all yours, John. ‘m all wet f’you.”
Seeing her try to speak in between moans and pants to declare that she was his turned him on even more than he thought could be possible. Wanting nothing but bliss for her, he slanted his hips to aim his thrusts upwards and-
“John! Fuck! Ha… I- oh my…”
He delighted himself in hearing her nonsensical blabber as pleasure overtook her senses. Gone, were her rational thoughts, and all she wanted was to let him know just how good he made her feel.
“So good… fucking- ha- h- y’feel s’good…”
“Yeah? Fuck- y’feel so good too, lov’ie. So tight, so warm for me.”
At his praise, a little grin made its way to her lips, so innocent – so sweet – that it looked utterly erotic.
That triggered another wave of arousal over him and he could feel his edge approach in the far distance. He wouldn’t finish without her, however, and he trailed one hand down her body to circle her clit firmly. Her arms gave out below her and she fell back with a cry.
“Oh, my Grace. Oh, Grace- oh, fuck!” Her hand clutched his tighter as her pitch went higher and higher. Her other hand left the mattress and grasped onto his shoulder instead, digging her nails into him with every movement that brought her closer to the edge. “’m gonna cum- oh, fuck! ‘m c’mming!”
He tightened the circular motion of his thumb on her clit and pressed harder. “Yeah, sweetheart? Cum for me, darling- fuck!”
Arching her back off the bed, she came with a cry of his name and subconsciously clenched her walls around his cock. The added pressure added more pleasure and his speed faltered as he was brought nearer towards his own orgasm. He held it back and maintained his thrusts as best he could to help her ride out her orgasm and only gave in once she started cursing in oversensitivity. “Fuckfuckfuckfuck- fuck! ‘s too much-”
“Shit- Vina!”
He groaned lowly at his final thrust and kept his hips glued against hers as he unloaded himself in her. The feeling of warm liquid spurting out of him drew a long moan out of her and she eased her grip on him. He gave two more short thrusts to milk himself fully before pulling out of her with a grunt, watching as the mixture of their cum dribbled out of her spent cunt and joining the pool of her liquid underneath.
Leaning forwards to connect their lips in a lazy kiss, he brushed her hair away from her face and surveyed her expression worriedly. “You feeling alright, lov’ie?”
“Mhm…”
She pulled his head nearer for another kiss and he smiled into it when she wouldn’t let go. “H’v to clean you up, lov’ie.”
“’Kay…”
A laugh rumbled through him when she frowned and he gave her another short kiss to appease her. “I’ll be back in a bit, yeah?”
She gave another affirmative hum and he withdrew off of her to head to the – thankfully – en suite to grab a washcloth after running it through warm water. He returned to wipe her skin clean before doing the same to the bed and floor. Rummaging through his clean clothes, he put on his boxers and passed an extra pair to her, who had regained enough will to sit up and watch as he tidied up the pile of their discarded clothes.
Once he was done with everything, she extended her arms for a hug, only to yelp in gleeful surprise when he lifted her up instead. He settled her under the duvet, switched off the lights, and slipped right beside her, her limbs instantly reaching out for him to cuddle against. They made themselves as comfortable as they could in his cot and settled down tiredly, his left arm under her head and the other thrown over her while both her arms wrapped themselves around him securely. She gave a content hum and nuzzled into his chest, finding solace in his presence.
“It wasn’t too much?”
John’s voice was quiet in the dark, seeking for an answer to nip his anxiety in the bud. He felt Levina shake her head, her matching tone weaving into the moonlight peeking through his curtains.
“It was good- better than good. ‘t was wonderful.” She pressed a kiss onto his pec reassuringly. “Thank you.”
An understanding smile crossed his lips and he similarly placed a kiss on top of her head. “Don’t have to thank me, lov’ie. I’ll always take care of you, give you all the loving that you need. I’m yours.”
He glanced down when she lifted her head. They could barely see each other but the love they shared would always glow even in the darkest of days.
“I’m yours, too, John. Always.” Her hands caressed his back in slow brushes while he brought his hand up to stroke her hair gently. “I love you.”
His lips could only reach her forehead in their position but that didn’t stop him from pouring out his affections for her with his kiss. “I love you, too, Lev.”
She hummed and returned her head to snuggle into his chest. “G’night, John.”
“Night, sweetheart.”
Their minds were quiet that night. The phantoms of their terrors steered clear of them, unable to approach the protective shield erected by their mutual love, entwined while in the presence of one another.
When they woke up the next morning, they indulged in spending a moment of domesticity in bed, kisses here and there as they merely relished in each other’s warmth. When they felt ready to start the day, Levina left, wrapped in John’s clothes, with last night’s outfit in her arms to deposit them in her laundry. Once she took a shower in the women’s common bathroom and ensured that she had covered all of John’s lovingly-placed marks splattering her skin, she left for the common room where John had been waiting with two filled cups in hand. Cuddled up together on the couch, they spent most of their available moments together in content silence, mind, soul, and body still fulfilled from last night’s act of intimacy. The flame of the barracks hearth couldn’t compare to the blazing passion crackling in their hearts for each other.
Breakfast was filled with grumblings from the hangover men, much to Levina’s amusement. John had gone ahead to settle some paperwork and had found her again in the shooting range before lunch with a message from Laswell.
“Meeting in five, you’re needed.”
“Understood, Captain.”
They were good at keeping the affections in their tone at a respectable level. Though, it was obvious that they were at least slightly fond of each other with the way John lacked a certain sharpness to his eyes that presented itself around others, and the way Levina didn’t completely stiffen up like she does with other superiors.
A friendly distance between them, they made their way to Laswell’s office. Levina narrowed her eyes in suspicion when the door opened to show Gaz, Soap, and Ghost also present; she had a feeling where this was going but quietened her thoughts to not get her hopes up. Laswell didn’t dawdle any further and opened up the meeting after Levina had paid her respects.
“Sergeant Riven, you have completed your intensive training under Lieutenant Mordell three days ago and your file has been updated with the necessary changes since then. The captains have given their consideration over your file and,” Laswell pinned Levina with a raised eyebrow, “you are fairly popular, I must say.”
Thankfully, Levina was saved from having to form a reply when Laswell continued. “I’m sure you have caught onto the reason as to why you’re here so I won’t delay any further. Sergeant Riven, meet your new team.”
Levina inwardly buzzed with exultation, careful not to let her emotions slip out too much in her small smile. She spared the team – her team – a glance and was met with a grinning Soap and a smiling Gaz while Ghost and John sent her a nod. Her heart felt heavy with the pride reflecting in their eyes and she swore to herself to never let them down even a smidge. She then turned back to Laswell who had a satisfied look on her face. “I’d say ‘I hope you get along well’ but I trust that you already do.”
Laswell went through the administrative matters for the rest of the meeting and ended on the note that they had an assignment coming up in a couple of weeks and that more would be said about it in a meeting later that week. Afterwards, as they were walking towards John’s office to discuss team norms and culture, with Soap’s arm thrown over Levina’s shoulder and Gaz on her other side as Ghost and John followed closely behind, elation and chatter high in the air, she knew she belonged.
When their assignment rolled in two months later, their immense success only proved her right. No casualties nor fatal wounds on their side, their task goal achieved, and no surprise ambushes; needless to say, they had celebrated it with a few rounds of drinks.
They had grown closer, the boys and Levina. They had come to the point that she had not hesitated to take off her top, leaving her in her modest sports bra, when it got too hot in their private sparring room. The first time that had happened, the boys had simply cheered her on with rather polite catcalls and whistles, teasing the captain when they saw that the love bites didn’t stop at her collar. John had taken all of their remarks in a stride with a proud look on his face, eyes grazing her skin all over as she laughed at the others’ comments. She had done the same when the teasing comments were aimed at her instead, that time when she had left her own marks on John and he, too, had discarded his shirt.
“You wish you had hickeys on you too,” she had retaliated, “imagine being lonely, couldn’t be me.”
The boys had not held back in sparring against her that day. Though, really, they had never limited themselves, so perhaps it was more of them going extra harsh on her. She could still feel the phantom pain of the bruise she had gotten when Gaz had flipped her over his shoulder. Ow.
Then, there was her and John. Grace, how she loved her man. They had spent more nights together following their first, mostly when the day had been particularly harsh on either one of them and they had sought the other’s comfort. Every day only pulled Levina and John deeper into their love for each other but they were still careful not to let it cloud their mind when responsibilities were heavy on their shoulders. They could switch to ‘work’ mode when they were in a professional setting, and the threat of death on-field helped prevent their affections from interfering with making rational decisions fit for a sergeant and captain respectively. It was only after their mission that they allowed themselves to express their worries and fears of losing each other as lovers, rather than soldiers.
“I won’t ask you to not make those kinds of decisions again because I know it’s your duty as a captain. So, be careful,” they had their foreheads pressed together as tears glimmered in her eyes upon remembering the close call John had experienced in the field. “Know that I’m with you, always.”
“And neither will I ever order you to stay back where it’s safe for my selfish reasons. You are a capable soldier that I, as your captain, am proud of. Keep me in your heart, always, and stay alert.”
Their unfailing understanding for each other only strengthened their love; they were confident that nothing could break it and – Grace forbids – if something tried, they would defend it to their last breaths.
As with any teams that had at least one member of each opposite sex in it, rumours circulated the compound of a possible couple within TF141. Currently, Gaz and Soap were the top contenders in being Levina’s rumoured partner with Ghost trailing not far behind. John was barely in the ranking, much to their relief, and he was only there because there were gossips of how she had slept her way into the team. Typical sexist behaviour, she had learned to ignore them the first time she had been assigned a team.
Nothing of significance occurred as months passed. They had been assigned a few missions, conquered them without major losses, and took weeks in between deployments to rest and recuperate. It was one of the latter times towards the end of the year when a momentous event rocked Levina’s world.
The team had just gotten back from their few nights long of an assignment, had been debriefed and dismissed, when Laswell called her into her office. Nervous anticipation coursed through her. The last time they had another one of these meetings, Laswell had told her that the mission to raid Griffon’s manor was to happen sometime this month. Details were understandably kept vague as the task had been assigned under the watch of another military branch more suited to the mission objectives.
Laswell had a sliver of a smile on her lips when Levina walked in. The small spark of hope in her intensified and singed her nerves. Once the salutations were given, Laswell seemed to soften and her the roughness to her voice were notably absent. “Good job on the recent assignment, Sergeant. I expect you know why I’ve called you here?”
Levina gulped, keeping her voice steady as she suggested, “to update regarding my sister’s circumstances, Ma’am.”
Laswell nodded as she rounded her desk to stand in front of Levina unobstructed. “The mission to retrieve Agustine’s victims from Jake Griffon’s manor occurred a few days ago.”
A beat.
“They have succeeded in meeting all the task objectives.”
Levina let out a heavy breath she didn’t even know she was holding. Blood thrummed in her ears and she could feel as if her guts had contracted to make space for her violently-beating heart. She bit her tongue so that her barrage of questions wouldn’t escape and gave Laswell a nod to green-light her readiness to hear more.
“They’ve had all the victims go through a mandatory checkup and Aurora has been reported to be physically well. For the healthy ones, they are now searching for any living relatives to reunite with them and bring them home.” Levina’s eyes went wide and her throat clogged up with unmistaken relief. She willed her tears to stop its production as her heart nearly burst with Laswell’s next words, “I wish you and your family a happy life, Sergeant Riven.”
Levina took a trembling breath in. “Thank you, Ma’am.”
Laswell didn’t admonish the shakiness to her tone and continued with more good news. “They’ve sent a ride to bring you to pick your sister up in their base. They’re waiting in the front gates but do take your time to prepare. I’ve signed off the two months leave that we have agreed on as preparatory measures and I’ll see you after New Year’s, Sergeant. Take care.”
Levina took one shake breath once she had left Laswell’s office.
In… Out…
And then she was rushing off to her barracks to collect her belongings. She had, thankfully, already showered and changed off into a casual training outfit so, with a quick word to her present roommates, she was out of her room in a fly. With no idea where her team were to bid goodbye, she headed straight to John’s office in hopes that he was at least there. His voice echoed through the door upon her knock and she stated her business, her smile clear in her tone. “Sergeant Riven! I have news from the chief, Captain!”
“What news do you have…” John’s words trailed off when Levina sped towards him after closing the door, forgoing any hint of propriety which told him she had come for personal business. “Love?”
She rounded his desk and he stood up to meet her concernedly, catching him in bemused surprise when she reached out to pull his head towards her in a kiss. Always a welcomed action, his hands fell on her hips as he instinctively tilted his head to press forward and she followed suit but pulled back only after a brief moment. Her words were rushed as she told him that her sister was back and that she was here to say her farewells as she’d be leaving right after. A grin had formed on his lips as she shared her elation and he cradled her cheek softly with one hand.
“Let me know once everything has calmed down, yeah? I’ll let the boys know too so don’t worry about that.”
“I will, thank you,” her voice was breathless as she caught her breath after her rushed explanation. “Need to leave now, I’ll see you soon, love.”
He gave her another quick kiss and brushed away her hair from her face. “See you soon, lov’ie. I love you.”
“I love you, too.”
The ride to the other base took about an hour. Now that the confidentiality of it all had been lifted, she spent the entire ride in a call with her dad. Tears were shed and hearts were filled as she told him everything, from how she had first founded out Aurora’s fate to the reunion happening soon that they thought they could never have in their entire lifetimes. She ended up pulling her dad away from work but he insisted that his boss would understand – and, well, if they didn’t, Levina would have a couple of words to offer to his superior.
Finally, they had reached their destination. Levina followed the driver as he led her to the medical bay in the compound and left her standing in front of a private unit with a knowing sympathetic smile. Her heart was pounding like never before and she lifted a shaking fist up to rap it against the door.
“It’s unlocked!”
Oh, Grace- her voice.
It was different, yet reminiscent of the high-pitched voice she had last heard almost two decades ago. Gone, were the cheeriness and innocence of a child and in place, it was lethargic and dull, haunted by the horrors she had been forced to endure. Her heart broke at the familiar tone that resembled her own back when she had just escaped Agustine, but she was hopeful that her sister could heal – that she would heal.
Twisting the doorknob, she pushed the door open slowly and her eyes immediately fell onto the girl – the woman – sitting up on the bed, hooked onto an IV bag.
“Rory?”
The name came out trembling and airy but the woman had heard Levina, nonetheless. Levina could see the moment recognition washed over the still figure and her name left the woman’s lips in, just as, a vulnerable voice.
“Vina?”
“Oh, Rory.”
Levina barely registered herself closing the door behind her before she was beside the bed in a heartbeat. Aurora had an arm reaching out to her and she didn’t hesitate to lean down and bring her sister into a tight hug, her tears falling unrestrained.
“Vina,” Aurora was also sobbing into her shoulder, body quivering as she croaked out her name in choppy breaths. “You’re here, Oh my Grace- it’s actually you.”
“I’m here, ‘m here. You’re safe with me, it’s alright now- you’re here.”
Disbelief and reassurances were exchanged in endless watery gasps, arms remaining locked around each other for some sort of material to hold onto for support. Levina had adjusted to sit on the bed to bring Aurora closer without having to break her back and it was only when Aurora pulled away slightly did she allow herself to do so too, keeping each other in their arms.
Levina gently caressed Aurora’s cheek, eyes scouring her face to remind herself that Auora’s here, her sister was coming home. A proud smile on her face, albeit with a hint of bitterness for all the time lost, Levina’s voice was soft and loving, “you’ve grown so much, love, y’ve been so strong all this time, yeah? My sweet Aurora…”
The younger shook her head, expression pained as more tears fell. “Had to be- didn’t wanna be but had to, otherwise he’ll- I- it’s-”
Levina shushed her sister lovingly and pulled her head to her chest so that she could hold the latter in a protective hug. “It’s alright, s’alright. A lot has happened but not anymore, yeah? You don’t have to be strong alone anymore- I’m here, dad’s here. We’ll move forward together with mom watching us up above, hm?.”
She felt Aurora nod her head as her arms wrapped themselves tighter around her torso.
The staffs must’ve known of Levina’s arrival because the sisters found themselves alone long enough to calm down the best they could. Levina was now sat beside Aurora so that she could hold her sister to her chest better as she patted her head – much like how their dad had held her when she first came home after her supposed-death. They were mostly silent, save the sniffling and hitched breaths, simply revelling in each other’s missed presence after all those years of separation.
The nurse came in well over an hour later and checked Aurora off for discharge, taking off the IV still hooked onto her and giving a couple of pointers to note of to take care of the bruises littering her body. No major injuries or harm had fallen upon Aurora, physically, and Levina only felt sick when she remembered Agustine’s men’s words on how her sister had been Griffon’s favourite.
They ordered a ride back home, which meant about another hour until they finally reached home. Their dad was in when they entered their flat, having taken time off from work earlier, and they had another round of a tearful reunion in the living room.
Dinner had to be delivered when evening came and they had forgotten about it. Aurora had gone for a shower afterwards and resumed her position in her dad’s arms on the couch while Levina sat beside the pair, bringing her legs up so that she could face them and lean her side against the back of the couch comfortably. They made small talks, updating each other on what they had missed. When Levina told of her current job in the military, Aurora brought up how a soldier from her rescue team had been the first one to tell her that she had a family still.
“Said my sister was the reason why they knew where I – and the others – were in the first place. Owed it all to you, apparently? They were borderline fanboying, I’m pretty sure.”
That had led to a conversation on how Levina had gotten the knowledge of Aurora’s whereabouts in the first place. Aurora was empathetic as she listened and both women shared a mutual understanding of their past horrible circumstances.
Aurora ended up falling asleep in her dad’s embrace and they moved her to Levina’s bed carefully. They shared a brief talk on sleeping arrangements and Levina was happy to take the couch for the meantime – and ever, if she was to stay over during her leaves from the compound – but they’d see what Aurora thought about it too. Levina sent a quick text to her team to ease their worries before she headed off to sleep.
The day had felt unreal – everything had felt unreal ever since she had found out her sister was still alive. Aurora hadn’t talked much about her time in captivity, understandably so, and they would all give her the needed time and space to open up if she ever wanted to. They had set an appointment with the appropriate psychologist to help guide her healing process, however slow it may be. They were a patient bunch, a prominent trait in their lineage, and no one was going to rush Aurora and pester her with unwelcomed pressure. They’d figure things out one by one, baby steps. What mattered most was that Aurora was home and she would heal.
It was a quiet night.
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ao3 🌱 topaz 🌱 masterlist
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giannan04 · 30 days
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straykidsnerd255 said
Hello there! I was wondering if I could possibly get a fluff and angst one-shot with S.Coups x female reader mafia au? The reader is just a regular girl who happens to find an injured S.Coups and she manages to get him back to her house so she can help with the wounds from a fight he had been in? Thank you in advance if you are able to do this!!!
Thank you so much @straykidsnerd255 for sending in my first request 🥹🫶🏻💕I hope you like it!
Pairing: Mafia Boss! S.Coups X Afab! Reader
Genre:Mafia au, Angst, Fluff
Warnings:None, just some angst and fluff!
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It was a chilly night, and the moon hung low, casting an eerie glow over the deserted streets. You shivered slightly, tugging your jacket tighter around your body as you made your way back home from the corner store. The bag of snacks and drinks in your hand was a comfort on nights like these when insomnia hit and you needed something to distract yourself.
You were only a block away from your apartment when something caught your eye—a figure slumped against the brick wall of an alleyway. The faint glint of metal, maybe a knife or gun, reflected briefly in the dim light. You almost kept walking, but something about the figure made you stop in your tracks. Against your better judgment, you slowly approached.
The man looked like he’d been through hell—bruised knuckles, blood smeared across his cheek, and a nasty gash across his side that darkened the fabric of his shirt. Despite his tough, intimidating appearance, you could see the exhaustion and pain in his eyes.
“Hey, are you okay?” you asked, voice trembling just slightly.
His eyes snapped to yours, sharp and alert, like a cornered animal ready to fight. He didn’t say anything at first, but you could tell he was trying to assess whether you were a threat.
“I’m not here to hurt you,” you said, holding up your hands in surrender. “You need help.”
The man scoffed, clearly not used to strangers offering him kindness. “I’ll be fine. You should leave.”
But you couldn’t just walk away. “You’re not fine. You’re bleeding out. My place is just around the corner—I can help you.”
There was a long pause before he nodded ever so slightly, as if admitting defeat. “Fine. Just... don’t ask questions.”
You nodded, understanding there was more to this man than met the eye, but now wasn’t the time to pry. Carefully, you helped him to his feet, slinging one of his arms over your shoulder as you led him back to your apartment. He winced with every step, but he stubbornly kept moving.
When you finally got him inside, you laid him down on the couch, your heart racing. You grabbed a first-aid kit from the bathroom, feeling a little out of your depth. Cleaning up scraped knees was one thing; stitching up a guy who’d clearly been in a gang fight was another.
“Why are you doing this?” he asked quietly, breaking the silence as you started cleaning his wound.
You paused, looking at him. “I couldn’t just leave you there. Everyone deserves a little help, right?”
He looked at you like he couldn’t quite figure you out. “You’re a strange one,” he muttered.
You couldn’t help but laugh softly. “I’ll take that as a compliment. What’s your name?”
He hesitated for a moment. “S.Coups,” he finally said, though you figured that was probably just an alias.
“Well, S.Coups, you’re lucky I found you. You could’ve bled out.”
“Yeah, lucky,” he repeated, though there was something bitter in his tone.
You worked quietly after that, focusing on tending to his injuries. He watched you with a guarded expression, as if he couldn’t decide whether to trust you. The tension in the air was thick, but it slowly started to fade as you patched him up.
Once you finished, you sat back, letting out a breath you didn’t realize you were holding. “There. You’re all set. You should rest.”
“Resting isn’t an option for me,” he replied, pushing himself up despite the pain. “But… thanks.”
“You don’t owe me anything,” you said quickly. “Just… stay out of trouble, okay?”
S.Coups gave a faint smile, one that didn’t quite reach his eyes. “Trouble finds me whether I like it or not.” He paused by the door, turning back to look at you. His expression softened as if he was struggling with something.
“There’s something you should know,” he said quietly, his voice tinged with guilt. “I’m involved in… illegal things. Gangs, fighting, debts. But… I don’t want this life anymore. I want out. But leaving isn’t easy. Once you’re in, it’s nearly impossible to get out.”
You could hear the pain and exhaustion in his words—the kind of hopelessness that comes from being trapped in a life you never wanted. Your heart clenched, but instead of judging him or pulling away, you moved closer, wrapping your arms around him in a comforting hug.
“Stay with me,” you whispered against his shoulder. “You don’t have to do this alone. I won’t judge you for your past.”
For a moment, he stiffened, unused to such gentle kindness, but slowly, he relaxed into your embrace. He buried his face in the crook of your neck, the tension melting from his body as he let out a shaky breath.
“You’re really something else,” he murmured, his voice thick with emotion. “I don’t deserve this.”
“Everyone deserves a fresh start,” you said softly, pulling back just enough to look into his eyes. “Stay with me tonight, and we’ll figure the rest out together.”
He gazed at you for a long moment before nodding, his walls crumbling just a bit more. “Okay… I’ll stay.”
You led him to your bedroom, offering him a spot next to you. It felt a little crazy, inviting someone you’d just met into your bed, but something about him made you trust that he wasn’t a danger to you. As he lay down beside you, he hesitated for a moment before slipping his arms around your waist, pulling you close.
The warmth of his embrace felt unexpectedly right, as if you’d known each other longer than just a few hours. His breath was soft against your neck as he nestled closer, finally allowing himself to rest.
Despite the whirlwind of events that had brought you together, everything felt strangely peaceful as you lay in his arms. His presence was comforting, like you were the safe haven he’d been searching for without even knowing it.
“Thank you,” he whispered one last time before sleep began to claim him.
You smiled, snuggling closer as you closed your eyes. “I’m just glad you’re here.”
And as you drifted off, his arms still securely around you, you knew that despite the odds, maybe this was the beginning of something good—something you both desperately needed.
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a1307s · 9 months
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Take Me From You #3
(Jason Todd)
[Art is not mine! Credit to Naijarski]
Requested by: ynight14  and RavenMoore7799
Keys:
Y/N: Your Name
Word Count: 2,814
Warnings and/or Pre-notes:
Gets a little heated at the end
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     I can hear the blood beating against the veins in my ears, drowning out the sound of Y/N and Bruce yelling at each other. The scene is almost funny. A hysterical Batman screams at Y/N to not kill as Y/N yells at him for being a murderer. A poor drug dealer sitting between the two screaming adults, confusion and fear on his face. I can feel the laughter brewing in my throat from the scene in front of me.
     Even with the mask covering a good chunk of her face, Y/N is as beautiful as she was the last time I saw her. Though she's more filled out than she was when we were fifteen, that only makes her prettier and is expected. She's not going to look the same as she did four years ago. Honestly, she could be in a flour bag, and I would still think she's the most perfect person in the room.
     Despite the funny scene in front of me, my heart races. I haven't seen her in years. I didn't even know if she was still in Gotham, let alone still in contact with Bruce. Given, it doesn't seem like good or willing contact, but it's still contact.
     Y/N's hair bounces around as she yells, making my fingers ache with the want to run them through it. The want to touch her, hold her, and hear her voice is overwhelming. Well, hear her talk to me in a normal tone at least, but I'm happy to hear her in any way, even if she is yelling. At Bruce, of all people.
     "I'm done. I'm done with you, you're helpless!" Bruce yells, throwing his hands up as he parades himself in a little circle. Y/N must have been a big hell-raiser over the years to get a response like that. The bat grabs the drug dealer, dragging him away as he mumbles to himself.
     I watch as Y/N turns on her heels, tilting her head back and forth as she uses her hand as a puppet, mimicking Bruce's meltdown as she walks away. It's good to see that she still has her humor. Good to see that Bruce hasn't managed to get her killed yet either.
     I follow after her, staying hidden as she walks away. I should talk to her, tell her I'm back. Maybe she knows though. I mean Bruce and Dick know so I would assume Y/N and Alfred know too. Though, if Bruce and her are fighting like this all the time I wouldn't be surprised if Bruce 'forgot' to mention my revival. It's a petty move that would be right up his way.
     Y/N turns down an alley, so I wait a second, just in case. The sound of metal scratching concert fills the night. It's quickly replaced by soft clicks of boots against metal. I poke my head around the corner, watching as she climbs up the fire escape. I slide forward, grabbing a hold of the latter before it slides back into place.
     I don't know why I feel the need to stay hidden as I watch her slide open a window and crawl in. Well, I kind of know. I don't know if it's best for me to just pop back into her life. Maybe she has a boyfriend or a husband. Maybe she has a whole family. If she has settled in life, what gives me the right to tear that up?
     I know it's selfish of me to hope her life ended when I died. What kind of shitty person hopes that? Me. I hope for that. Given, I also hope she's had a fulfilling life since my passing, I just hope it wasn't with another man.
     As I climb up the fire exit, ideas of how to kill Y/N's imaginary boyfriend circle my head. Maybe Bruce is right, maybe I am crazy. I try my best to be silent as I follow Y/N's path. Once I'm on her floor level, I push myself against the brick wall, not wanting to startle her. Well, I'm doing it mostly to catch a breather and prepare for the worst.
     It takes a second, but once my courage is built up, I move, looking into her window, only to be met with a gun barrel in my face. "What the fuck Y/N?!" I yell, raising my hands in a sign of surrender. It would be pretty shitty to come back to life just for my girlfriend - ex-girlfriend? - to blow my head off.
     My eyes scan over her maskless face, taking in her bright eyes, her cheekbones, and her lips. God her lips. It might just be the horn-dog in me, but I've missed her kissing me the most. Well... I can think of other parts of her I missed more. Off-topic, very off-topic thoughts. My... Y/N is holding a gun to my face and my identity is still very much hidden in my helmet. I need to stay on topic.
     "Who the fuck are you?" She yells, her finger featherily light on the trigger. Her body shifts some, causing a small clinking sound.
     My eyes drop down to her neck, the direction the sound came from. Wrapped around her neck and resting on her chest is a black chain with two rings strung on it. One is a basic black ring, with a red band through it. Even from here, I can make out the words on it. Curved on the inner side of the band are the words 'Come home to me' with Y/N's name next to it.
     The other band is a copy of the first but with a small ruby held in the middle. 'Be safe for me' is curved into this one, my name next to the wording. It's the first thing I ever bought Y/N. I bought it when we were thirteen, the cheesy words curved into them being enough to back that up. It took three weeks of pickpocketing to afford, but it was worth every penny.
     "Who. The fuck. Are you?" Y/N repeats, empathizing her words more.
     "Um... Jason... Todd..."
     Y/N's face shifts to confusion and then anger. "Last time I checked, Jason Todd is buried in a box in the Gotham Graveyard. So, try again asshole."
     "Bruce buried me in the fucking public graveyard? Didn't even cross his mind to bury me in the Wayne Graveyard? What the fuck?" I say before I can stop myself.
     "What is going on?" Y/N murmurs, shaking her head some as her eyes widen. "Go... go away murderer," she says, pointing the gun down before slamming the window shut.
     Murderer? Like she wasn't just fighting with Bruce over her wanting to murder someone. I stand still, hands still in the air as I watch Y/N march around her apartment, panic-cleaning as she talks to herself. Her head keeps shifting around like she's trying to erase what just happened. Hopefully, this isn't how she would react if a different murderer appeared outside her window.
     Once my head is on straight again, I push the window open, the wood of it yelling in discomfort as it moves. Y/N keeps pacing around, muttering to herself about crazy people and leaving Gotham. I carefully crawl in, making sure not to knock into anything.
     I let myself rest against the windowsill, watching her pace around the small apartment. How has she lived this long if this is her response to a stalker? Maybe I caused her a mental breakdown.
     A small smile rests on my face as I tug off my helmet and set it on the side table placed next to the window. It's littered with loose change and bullets. Good to see she still has a careless air to her. I always found it cute when we were younger. It made me feel needed, knowing she wouldn't pay attention to the small details even if it would make her life easier. I liked doing those things for her, I like her needing me to do those small things, even if it's not things that need to be done.
     I snap my mask off as well, placing it next to my helmet. Y/N continues to mutter and pace, occasionally throwing a phrase or two at me as she works her thoughts out. I look around her space. There's not much of it, which I'm not surprised about. It is an apartment in Gotham after all. Her living space is filled with bookcases, all of them filled to the seams with books and movies. There's a big, overstuffed couch across from a pricey television, probably an apology gift from Bruce. He's good at replacing emotions with money, which is easy to do when you have enough for ten lifetimes.
     Y/N's kitchen is littered with recipe books, loose papers, random dishes, and spices all over the counters. Her fridge is littered with pictures and more papers. Her bathroom and bedroom doors are swung open, unsurprisingly. She sucks at closing doors.
     Just like Y/N's kitchen, her bathroom counters are littered with makeup. Her bedspread is a mess, but besides that, her room is pretty straight and tidy. Even the nightstand by her bed is item less besides a lone alarm clock. That's not usual for her, maybe Y/N does have a boyfriend. A boyfriend who doesn't mind taking care of the small details for her, just like I used to do.
     From here, I can see the edge of a small table, a deep green cloth drooping off of it, that's tucked into a corner of her room. I let my curiosity get the better of me and push myself off the windowsill, making sure to close it behind me or else it'll be left open for the next two to three weeks.
     I walk into the room, expecting a hidden mess, but there's none to be found. I let my gaze settle on the mystery table that's not so much a mystery anymore.
     In the middle of the table is a picture of me. Well, a picture of us. It's from our first date night at the manor. I'm stretched out on the couch, my head in Y/N's lap and her hands tangled in my hair as we both smile at the camera.
     On either side of the picture is a candle; A white one for peace and a pink one for love. Each is held in a gold candle holder. In front of the picture is a few things. One is a bowl of Skittles, my favorite candy. To the left is a small, blue, empty bowl, and to the right is a full, red bowl.
     In the full bowl is the jewelry I use to wear; my dog tags Bruce gave me, the pocket watch I got from Alfred, the matching Robin bracelet from Dick, and my family cross I got from my mother.
     "So... you are alive," Y/N says, pulling my attention from the altar to her, standing in the doorway. She keeps shifting her weight and her fingers tap against the wood. It would only be more obvious that she's nervous if the word was stamped onto her forehead.
     "So, you made me an altar," I tease, trying to help Y/N calm down and loosen up some.
     "Of course, I made you an altar, Jay. You're Hispanic, it's part of your culture. Just because Bruce won't respect it doesn't mean I won't," Her words come out hot and fast, like she's embarrassed that I saw her memorial of me.  "Dumb, stupid, ginger ass, Hispanic boy," she mumbles, walking into the room.
     "Not my fault a Hispanic woman fell in love with an Irish man," I shoot back, watching as she slides onto her bed, her eyes looking everywhere but me.
     "I know," she mutters, lying back on her bed. "So... you must have one hell of a story to tell me."
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     Ever since my lap around the Lazarus pit, it's been weird waking up. Mostly because my body doesn't remember it's alive yet, and partly because my subconscious has the same feeling, which means it takes a second to remember to breathe in the morning.
     Just like every morning, it takes me a second to remember how to breathe along with taking some time to remember I'm not in a box in the ground. I can feel pressure on my chest. It isn't dirt, it's just my mind playing tricks on me. Just a PTSD attack. It'll clear up any second now.
     Except, it doesn't clear up. I debate on whether I should open my eyes or not. Sometimes opening my eyes makes the attack worse. I don't want to take that chance. There's nothing on my chest, I'm fine. I repeat the thought as I slide my head over my chest. Instead of coming in contact with myself, my fingers slide into a bundle of hair. Well, that's not dirt but the sure as shit is something or someone on top of me.
     I slowly open my eyes, being met with the sight of Y/N curled up on top of me. I can feel the smile crossing my face as I look down at her. She looks so peaceful, fast asleep, softy breathing as she clings to me. I've missed these peaceful moments with Y/N. Most days memories like these were the only thing keeping me going.
     I shift a bit, peaking at the alarm clock on her nightstand; Five sixteen. I didn't plan on spending the night, but there was a lot to talk about, and a lot of time to make up for. Most of the time was spent with me explaining everything from the past four years, my death, the Lazarus pit, my service in the League of Assassins, my reappearance in Gotham, and the newly forming hatred between Bruce and me.
     I guess we ended up falling asleep on accident, especially since my boots are still on. That, and Y/N is still in her spandex suit.
     I shift again, flexing my arm and fingers to try and shake the static feeling out of the arm Y/N's head is on. Despite my efforts to not wake her, Y/N stirs, shifting around on top of me. She whines a bit, her body scooting down my body as she moves. It feels nice having her weight on me, feeling her body heat crashing into me. "Good morning," I whisper, rubbing my hand through her hair.
     "Good morning," She whispers back, pressing a sloppy kiss into my chest. It's sweet, but I wish my shirt was off, I wish I could feel her lips against my bare skin. "You're alive," she adds, sleep still very evident in her voice.
     "I'm alive," I repeat, wrapping my free hand around her back. I pull her up my body, her legs squeezing my sides as her head tucks into my neck. I struggle with being alive again, a lot. It's hard dealing with Bruce. It was hard being in debt to Ra's Al Ghul. Despite that all, in this very moment, it's so worth being alive.
     I flip us over, Y/N's hold still strong on me as I do so. I prop myself up with my knee, not wanting to crush her under me. "I missed you so much," I murmur, sliding my hands under her shirt, the spandex clinging to both of us now.
     "I missed you too," Y/N answers, sliding her hands into my hair, her fingers twirling the strands around themselves. I push her shirt up, laying kisses across the newly exposed skin. It's been so long since I've seen her, smelt her, touched her. After four long years of nothing but my thoughts of her, I can finally play out all my fantasies. I mean, there's no better way to start the day than with a bang.
     Soft mewls fall from her, only encouraging me more. If I had my way, I would keep her locked away in this apartment. Just her and me, and my longing for her. Nothing but her begging for me and me answering her every beck and call.
     "Y/N?" I hum against the skin of her stomach. She tugs softly on my hair, letting me know she's listening. "We're going to stay right here, all week. Maybe even two weeks."
     "I... I can't. I have work."
     "Not anymore. You're not leaving this apartment until we play out every last thought I've had of you. All four years' worth." Her legs tighten around me, an easy sign of her getting needy, an easy sign of me getting my way. I smirk to myself, dipping my hands down to her thighs. "After all, making you feel good is the least I could do after letting Bruce take me from you." Y/N lets out a breathy moan, letting me know I won.
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inamindfarfaraway · 1 year
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Double Standard
[Batman and the Red Hood are confronting Two-Face, who is robbing the Second National Bank at the climax of a bloody crime spree. Two-Face points one pistol at Red Hood, who has two of his own, and the other at Batman, who holds a Batarang.]
Batman: You know how this goes, and tonight you're outnumbered. Why not just surrender?
Two-Face: Actually, I was hoping the two of you would show up. Maybe now I can finally get some answers. Tell me, Batman: how is the Red Hood killing people in the name of justice any different from me doing it?
Batman: What?
Red Hood: Ooh. This is interesting.
Two-Face: You heard me. When he does it, he’s a vigilante. When I do it, I’m just another criminal. He even started out as a crime lord! (to Red Hood) You sold drugs, you sold guns, you decapitated eight people and used their heads in a bag to intimidate their bosses -
Red Hood: (chuckles) Yeah, that was a good night.
Two-Face: And you still get to wear that Bat on your chest! You just showed up with it one day. Why? How? What the hell happened? I guess the Bat rules are much more negotiable than they’ve always been made out to be. In that case, I’m trying to clean up the city too. (to Batman, gesturing to Red Hood) Surely you either have to lock up both or neither of us. I can flip for it if you can’t choose.
Batman: The difference is that Red Hood has earned my trust. He only kills as a last resort, and only people who are dangerous, powerful and unrepentantly malicious enough that it’s the most utilitarian solution. He doesn’t hurt or rob the innocent. And he has control of his mental faculties, rather than taking lives randomly and unpredictably based on the flip of a coin.
Red Hood: Well, doesn’t Two-Face often target corrupt politicians and crime lords too?
Batman: Don't escalate this.
Red Hood: I'm just stating facts.
Two-Face: (to Red Hood) Exactly! Thank you. (to be Batman) Okay, fine, I’ve got the coin thing and a lot less restraint, but you’ve also stopped me killing absolute bastards who it would have been extremely difficult, if not impossible, to take down legally. You let Hood do that. Why not me? Or are you simply a hypocrite?
Red Hood: I slaughtered the leaders of a human trafficking ring last month. It was so satisfying.
Batman: Stop. (to Two-Face) It’s… it’s complicated. Look, let’s put this aside for now. You must concede that you still need to serve time for your many crimes against undeserving civilians.
Two-Face: We are not putting this aside! I'm serious! I have lost sleep over this! What does Red Hood have when it comes to killing scumbags has that I don't?
Red Hood: ...A face-protecting helmet?
Two-Face:
Batman:
Harvey, distantly listening in the system's inner world: He's right.
[Cut to the Batcave. Jason is lying in the infirmary as Alfred stitches up a bullet wound in his abdomen that could have very easily been fatal.]
Alfred: And then he shot you?
Jason: And then he shot me.
Alfred: And what do you take away from this?
Jason: That Bruce is an even bigger hypocrite than I’d thought, I’m hilarious and I have no regrets.
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Title: '23 Bonnie & Clyde {One Shot}***
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Title: 23 Bonnie & Clyde ***
Den Of Thieves Ray Merrimen x OFC Aria
Warnings: Action, Blood, Violence, Heavy Cursing, 18+ Mature Content, Gun Violence, Crime, Angst, Smut, Rough Sexual Activity, Glove Free Lovin, Plenty of Words
Words: 15,575k
Summary: Picks up with Ray being pinned down by Nick and his team after the heist. With his team dead and 2 bullets making it hard to go on, Ray believes his ticket’s been punched. Unexpectedly, an angel swoops in to save the day. However, is she an angel of mercy or heartbreak?
Note: @waterfallsandsunsets As my first accepted commissioned fic, I hope you enjoy this, and I hope it meets your expectations. I want to thank you for requesting this and even more for wanting to pay for a story from me. From the bottom of my heart, thank you!
Note II: Ray Merrimen and Pablo girlies I hope you enjoy this.
***Very Loosely Edited***
~~~~~~~~~~
-Ray-
Around him, he could hear the echoing of the heavy gunfire he was currently in the middle of. It sounded like he was in a hollowed tunnel making it easy to hear every sound. The crunching of footsteps that were attempting to stealthily creep toward him, failing miserably by his military training standards, the zing, and whizz of every missed bullet, the painful beat of his heart that was slowing with every minute.
A strong pang of pain gripped him making him curse out. He clapped his hand over his chest and grimaced. He didn't know how he would make it out of this one. All his life he'd lived by the gun and knew he'd die by it too but somehow he didn't expect it now. He thought he'd be old and grey before that bullet with his name on it punched his ticket.
He slid his hand lower just underneath his heart and felt wetness there. When he raised his fingers to his face the crimson liquid that coated his fingers confirmed it. A heavy sigh escaped his lips as he dropped his head back to look into the sky. It was yet another beautiful California day. He knew it was a hot one but couldn’t quite feel the warmth of the sun anymore. A shiver rushed through him then he heard his name.
“Merrimen, it doesn’t have to be like this. You’ve got nowhere to go. Come out with your hands up!”
He scoffed. That son of a bitch, he thought. If he really expected him to come out and surrender he hadn’t read his file properly.
“Never surrender,” he mumbled feeling the drowsiness trying to overtake him.
Shaking it off, he wiped his hands dry then gripped his weapon. Checking the chamber, he realized his clip was empty. With slow, painful movement he dug into his vest searching for his ammo but found none.
“Sh—shit!”
He was truly fucked. Either he was going to be cuffed and saved at the hospital then sent back or he would die a free man, right here, right now. It only took him a few moments to make his mind up. He meant every word he’d said a week ago. He was never going back to prison. He took several breaths trying to psych himself up for the next round of pain he would feel. No man wanted to face death but he’d long prepared for his death. He didn’t fear it.
Suddenly, her face popped into his mind making him freeze. He’d often thought of her. Every night her face somehow wandered in through the slips of his mental blocks, the ones he’d purposely put up in heavy efforts to not think about her. In those wee hours of the morning, while he laid in his bunk surrounded by other men in their 9 by 5 cells doing the same, he’d think about her. Since his release from prison, he’d thought of her more and more as people, places and things often brought back memories, good and bad.
He heard the thud of footsteps creeping up on his right and they brought him back to reality. Pretty soon he’d stop thinking about her completely. Maybe in death, he could finally get peace.
“Nut up!”
He rose to his feet then turned to where he knew that Detective Nick was waiting. He came face to face with the man aiming his weapon right at him.
“Don’t do it Merrimen!”
He waited.
“We can end this peacefully. It doesn’t have to end this way.”
His vision blurred and his heartbeat slowed. “I told you—I’m not going back.”
The man across the way clenched his jaw and he almost saw a look of disappointment across his features, but he didn’t wait. He raised his empty gun knowing he’d take the shot, truly ending this.
“Don’t!”
Suddenly, rapid gunfire rained around him sending the man jumping to seek cover while he dropped back. Chaos reigned around him in the form of three white vans rolling up creating a “U” shape shield around him. His mind recognized it as an operational defensive tactic, one he’d done in his years of service. Again, his eyes went blurry as his heart slowed. Gripping his chest, he focused on the sky trying to get himself in control so he could make sense of the situation and defend himself if needed.
“Secure the perimeter. We’re out of here in one minute!”
The voice was garbled like he was underwater, and they were above it. He grabbed his gun and pointed it forward making contact with a chest. The figure above him was masked with only their eyes revealed.
“I got you. ‘Till the end imma ride wit’ you.”
Recognition flamed in his head. He’d heard those words before. He’d said those words before. Only one other person in the world would ever utter them. He froze but before he could move again, he lost consciousness with those eyes being the last thing he saw.
~~~~~~~~
-Aria-
“What a fucking mess!”
Milla was pissed. One thing she hated was a sloppy op and what Ray had found himself in the middle of was a sloppy op.
“From the stories about this guy never thought he’d be part of something like this.”
“Shit went sideways,” Jada replied.
“Hey! Fucking focus on getting us the fuck out of LA and to the fucking jet!”
If Milla was pissed, you were downright seething. She was right, it was a sloppy op and shit had gone sideways. Fuck they went way past sideways. You made a mental note that you’d find Donnie’s ass and put two bullets through his skull for this bullshit.
“Apply more pressure!”
You, Uki, Keturah, and Lyn were each pressing on each bullet wound in an attempt to slow the bleeding. Your efforts seemed pointless as his blood poured out of him like a calcified showerhead.
It was a good thing you got there when you had. As you pushed harder on his chest, you stared into his face. You didn’t know how it was possible, but he looked the same given some wrinkles here and there. His face was the same but weathered, aged to that of a grown man. Your heart beat painfully thinking of how serious his condition currently was.
“Aria, I don’t know if he’ll make it,” Uki announced.
Your eyes snapped to her and in the same second that they made contact, she looked down.
“I’m just saying. His vitals are not good,” you mumbled not wanting to be the bearer of bad news.
“He’ll make it!”
The entire van went quiet. You hadn’t meant to scream at her, so you took a breath and looked back to Ray, and repeated your words in a calmer voice.
“He’ll make it. He’s lived through worse.”
The remainder of the drive passed in near silence. Except for updates from the other vans and checking in to confirm perfect execution of your plan and distraction no one else said anything that wasn’t mission specific. You split your focus between the next steps of the plan and keeping Ray alive. You’d estimated that the drive to the airfield would take 40 minutes and in those 40 minutes, he’d flatlined twice. You were glad that you were the type of person to bet on things going wrong. It was that foresight that found a mini hospital in every van.
With Uki’s help, you managed to bring Ray back every time he flat-lined with the aid of adrenaline and a defibrillator. Each time took longer but you refused to give up. It wasn’t his time; you’d make damn sure of it.
“Offload,” Keturah shouted as the van rolled to a stop.
Everyone sprang into action, tackling their tasks. Milla and Keturah handled stripping the van, and Lyn took care of erasing every bit of artillery so there would be not even a serial number left on anything left behind. You, Jada, and Uki lifted Ray to the waiting jet.
“Fuck he’s heavy!”
He sure was and from the looks of him, it was pure muscle. Prison had changed him. The two men in the jet hurried to help load him in.
“Let’s go. 40 seconds!”
Just then, the van went up in flames. As if that was the signal, all your femme fetales assembled and boarded the jet. Within a minute you were taking off. As the jet gained altitude the van on the ground exploded leaving flames, shards, and nothing else in your wake.
~~~~~~~
-That Night-
All was quiet, which was what you expected. This was your compound in Mexico, and it was heavily guarded. Only those who needed to know knew about it. You watched as the doctor finished his examination of your hurried work in the van and the jet. You’d had more than enough experience patching yourself and others up to know your work was sufficient, but you wanted to make sure you got all the shards out. You didn’t go through all this to have a bullet fragment sneak to his heart.
You sat on the window seat then continued tapping your combat boot-clad feet. The sound echoed in the room as dull thuds for several minutes before you sprang to your feet again to pace the room some more.
“You’ve never been anxious like this with anyone else,” Manolo said his voice filled with certainty. “Losing faith in my skill?”
“No. He’s just--not—anyone.”
He looked back at you and studied your face for a few moments then turned back to a still unconscious Ray. Manolo nodded then stood.
“Well, I think you turned a pretty horrible situation into a bad one, which is an improvement and impressive.”
“Will he make it?”
Manolo sighed and took his time before he spoke. The seconds that stretched only made you more anxious. You were milliseconds away from snapping at the man, but his voice stopped your outburst.
“It’s hard to say. His injuries are extensive. From what I can see you’ve got all the bullets and I don’t see any fragments so that’s good news, but I’ve seen men die from injuries less severe than these. It’s a miracle he is still alive.”
“What—what does that mean Manolo?!”
Your frustrations were getting the better of you now.
“I know you want a guarantee, but I can’t give one. If he—if he can make it the next 72 hours then I say his chances are very good but--.”
He took off his glasses and pinched the bridge of his nose. His grey-speckled hair was coiffed in an effortless style that framed his face and showcased the wrinkles he'd acquired from years of work and little sleep. He and your father were good friends and one on the very short list of people he trusted, which meant you trusted him too.
“The next 72 hours I expect to be touch and go.”
You sighed and then looked at Ray. It wasn’t a death sentence, but it wasn’t a glowing bill of health. There was hope at least.
“Thank you, Manolo,”
He nodded then looked back to Ray. “I will stay close tonight in case you need me again.”
You nodded and watched him pack his things up to then exit the room. For the first time since you'd laid eyes on him, you were alone together. Half of you was relieved he was unconscious so you didn't have to talk but the other half wanted more than anything for him to wake up even if it spelled trouble for you.
You stood across the room for so long that the bottoms of your feet burned. It had been a long day and even longer 48 hours in prep for his extraction. Your body was exhausted, but sleep wasn’t an option. There was no way you could sleep now. Slowly you walked to his bedside never taking your eyes off of his face. you trailed over every detail of his face. Every wrinkle, every mole, every hair, everything that you’d missed out on. Your body buzzed to get closer, palms itched to touch him. The urges were so powerful that the exhaustion in your body was so strong that you gave in.
Sitting at the edge of the bed you slowly reached your hand to his full beard however when you were centimeters from touching him your hand stopped. Fear stilled your actions dousing whatever urges you had moments before. Looking lower at his torso, you decided to clean him instead of putting yourself in a position where things would quickly escalate.
As you wiped away the dried blood and sweat from his body your mind drifted to admiring what you now confirmed without a doubt was heaviness from muscle. For the love of everything holy, he was built like all he did in prison for those 10 years was pump iron. You tried not to think of the pictures you’d gotten over the last week of him disappearing into the blonde dancer’s house time and time again. You tried not to think of the things that happened behind that door that your cameras couldn’t get into.
Though you tried to keep the thoughts at bay, when you got to his “Peckerwood” tattoo you couldn’t help but drift to how she touched him, how he found solace after 10 years without in her body.
“Fuck!”
You threw the rag down into the water ignoring how it cascaded over the rim and onto the wooden floors. You stood, wiped your hands, and took a safer seat, across the room where your view of his body wasn’t clear.
Knock-knock
“Come.”
In walked a cleaned-up Uki with a tray. She placed it on the table near your chair then stood there watching Ray just as you were.
“Manolo told us.”
You nodded.
“I can take first watch so you can get cleaned up,” she offered.
You didn’t answer. In truth, you barely heard her.
Knock-knock.
“Come.”
Jada and Lyn came in next and stood to your left adding their two pairs of eyes to Ray.
“Found you some clothes,” Jada breached.
“Team 2 and 3 made it home without any problems after initiating endgame. Right about now they should have an ID on the body from the fire and that ID will be a one hundred percent match for 1 Mr. Ray Merrimen,” Lyn informed.
You released a slow breath as the final piece of your plan seamlessly synced with the others laid before it. That was it then.
“Come in Keturah,” you called before the knock you knew was coming sounded.
They all snorted as Keturah walked in and approached the bed getting a good look at Ray.
“Still can’t believe this famous Ray turned out to be a white man oh.”
That was just what everyone needed to hear before they busted out laughing. It went on for so long that you felt the stress that your body had harvested slowly leave you. You looked around at your girls. They’d been with you through thick and thin and you trusted them with your life. They were always there for you, and you were more than grateful.
“He might be a well-seasoned white man,” Lyn added which made them holler with laughter.
You’d expected their teasing once they saw him in person. You’d prepared yourself for all of this. In fact, you were enjoying their teasing. You’d been tense for so long it felt good to breathe for a change. You rotated your head trying to ease your sore muscles.
“You should eat, then shower. I know you’ll hate it if he sees you for the first time looking like you spent 3 nights in a hot hut.”
You pressed the back of your hand to your cheek. “I don’t look that bad.”
“Ya’ look worse,” they all collectively said.
Your jaw dropped but they only laughed more. The six of you sat around the room and chatted as you ate the meal Uki brought in. With each passing minute, you felt more and more like yourself. In the back of your mind, your fears and anxieties were still raging but they were quieted enough that you could celebrate small victories. After, Uki stayed by Ray’s side as you showered and made yourself less of a mess.
With your mind calm that Uki was around, and Manolo was in the house you took the time to pamper yourself a little. The hot water did the job of a pair of well-trained hands and melted away the knots in your shoulders and back while the scents from the diffuser worked on your mood and stress. You’d jumped over one hurdle and there were two more waiting for you, the final one was waiting for you at home.
When you went back into the room Ray was still unconscious and Uki was there on her phone.
“Ah, you look and smell a lot better.”
“Girl shut up!”
“Seriously, you look better.”
You nodded then sighed. “I’m holding up.”
“I just got word from Junu, and he is livid.”
You nodded. It was expected. You knew this whole operation would upset him especially since he’d vehemently forbade it.
“I’ll take the blame and whatever punishment he dishes out. You guys will be safe.”
“While your father terrifies me, I won’t let you be punished alone.”
“You all were just following my orders. I will take the heat.”
Uki studied you then looked back to Ray. “Is he worth it?”
She didn’t just mean the punishment you’d take but the risk and danger. You looked at Ray and slowly approached him. You knew the answer without a shadow of a doubt.
“Till the end!”
Seconds later you heard the click of the door as it closed. You were again alone with him. This time you dragged the chair closer and sat back down hunkering down for a sleepless night.
~~~~~~~~
You awoke to heavy shuddering and grunting. You’d only closed your eyes for a moment, or so you thought. However now, Ray was seizing in the bed, body riddled with violent thrashing.
“Shit, Ray!”
You moved to the edge of the bed and noted the way his body was drenched with sweat. Once you touched him you pulled back, he was burning up.
“Shit!”
You leaped up, grabbed the bowl beside the bed, and sprinted to the bathroom to fill it with cold water. When you returned you wasted no time applying the cold wet cloth to his forehead. When his seizing intensified you hollered for help as you turned him onto his side. With one hand you took up another cloth, dipped it into the water, and placed it in his mouth so he wouldn’t bite down on his tongue. It was then the girls ran into the room in a panic.
“Get Manolo. He’s seizing and has a fever.”
“On it,” Jada shouted before she disappeared.
The others approached the bed and tried to help you keep him on the bed and wipe him down. In what felt like a lifetime Jada returned with Manolo who sprang into action. He took your spot and administered an injection into the IV he’d placed when he first got here.
“This will help the seizure.”
Within minutes Ray’s convulsions slowed until they stopped altogether. Manolo then injected another needle into the IV.
“This will bring down the fever. He’s more than likely fighting off an infection. I already gave him something for that.”
“What do we do?”
“Nothing. We wait. I know you hate that answer, but I don’t have a better one. He has to do the work now.”
After thirty minutes of monitoring, Manolo left again satisfied that the seizure did not return. After that, you didn’t dare fall asleep again. Every thirty minutes you wiped his body with cold cloths and bundled him tighter, so he felt some warmth. By the time the sun rose the next day, he hadn’t gotten any better and your stress returned tenfold. He couldn’t be moved in this state, so your flight home was delayed until he made it through the other end of this.
The day passed with each of you sitting with him making sure his fever was kept in check and his seizures were managed. He fared well during the day but when the sun disappeared his seizures returned and persisted for much of the night. By the 2nd night there he’d begun spitting up blood. Manolo was hours away from making the choice to take him to a hospital when the sun rose on the third day and with that new day came calm.
“I think he’s passed the worst of it,” Manolo said as he took his glasses off after his very thorough examination.
“Are you sure?”
“His vitals are much better. Heartrate is not quite normal yet but considering he was close to losing a lung he is doing well.”
“Why hasn’t he woken up yet?”
“Well, I induced a temporary coma to help him heal. I’ve started to wean him off so the medication I put him on should leave his system within the day. Perhaps tomorrow he’ll come to.”
“Will he live Manolo?”
“If this continues and he comes out of this tomorrow I feel good about his chances.”
You rubbed your face pressing just a bit so the tension would go.
“Thank goodness.”
“If all progresses, you should be good to fly the day after tomorrow.”
“Thank you, Manolo.”
“Aria, you’re like family. I’d do anything for you,” he said placing his hand on your shoulder. “You should rest.”
You nodded knowing those were doctor’s orders you wouldn’t be following. Not yet.
~~~~~~~
-The Next Day-
You were sitting by Ray's bedside once again after another sleepless night. Uki's question had been playing over and over in your mind like an annoying one-hit wonder that you couldn't forget. The longer you sat with the question the more it warped. No, your answer hadn't changed but you began to wonder if he would also say the same.
The last 10 years or so couldn't have been easy. No one thrived in prison. The environment wasn't conducive to that. The system needed a change if it was tasked with reforming wrongdoers. You knew being inside chipped away pieces of who you were before going in so you knew he was hardened. What you worried about was; how hardened was he. Was there any bit of the person you'd known? Or was this man laying at death's door a stranger with a monster lurking within
Knock-Knock
“Come.”
You tried to make yourself look like you hadn't been hyper-fixated on watching the man before you all night, tried to look detached and nonchalant.
“You look like shit.”
“For fuck's sake Uki!”
“What? If I looked as bad as you, one of you better keep it real and tell me the same,” she replied as she put down another tray.
“Guess you're expecting a thank you for telling me I look like shit?”
Uki shrugged and crossed her arms as she took her place beside you.
“Fuck thank you.  Just tell me you know and I'm right. That's my love language,” she joked.
However, it wasn't a joke. She did love being right. She got off on it. She constantly wore a smug look across her beautiful flawless features. It was as if she always walked with an air about her that she was higher than those around her. To tell the truth, it was one of the reasons you gravitated to one another and formed a quick friendship when you were children.
As The Viper's only daughter and heir, you knew you were above them in rank and status, and while most would relish the fact it always suffocated you. Being at the top of the food chain put you on a whole different playing field and on that field, you always had a target on your back.
“We may have trouble.”
Your head snapped to her waiting for her to continue. Of course you did, it had been way too calm and quiet.
“Razu,” Uki muttered.
Her one-word response didn't need to be followed up with anything else. You sighed so heavily that it almost sounded like the danger declaring hiss of the creature your father got his name from. Everyone knew you didn't disturb vipers; it was a “duh” rule in the animal kingdom. Do not disturb the vipers and never disturb the den. Razu was the one who never quite understood the unspoken rule.
“Where is he?”
“Downstairs with an entitled look on his face. He demands to see you.”
That almost hiss came out and filled the room this time.
“He heard whispers of you going to America and wants to talk about why.”
“Why? Ha, do I answer to him now oh?!”
Uki sighed and shrugged. “Seeing how he is…”
“Finish that sentence and we will have a serious discussion on how much of my coming punishment you will be taking.”
Uki zipped her lips with her fingers and allowed the silence to stretch.
“If he heard whispers then he probably suspects something. Our people in Los Angeles probably tipped him off.”
Your eyes slipped back to Ray. Shit, you thought.
Another near hiss escaped you.
“Yep. Either he is here to confirm his suspicions and try to use it as his proof you are not fit to take over on your own or--.”
“Ipenija is iku,”{challenge to the death},” you finished.
“Yep.”
“Fuck! There is no way Ray can do a challenge right now.”
“No. This white meat would be dead meat,” Uki teased.
“Really Uki? Right now?”
She smiled then shrugged again. She was right though. You had to make sure Razu found nothing. You reached into the bedside drawer and took out your 3 guns then checked the chambers. Locked, loaded, and ready for action. You tucked one in the front waistband of your jeans and the other in the back. You then took up your thigh holster from where it hung on one of the posts of the bed. Rather than bringing along the third gun you left it on the bedside table and patted your arsenal of knives loaded on the contraption. It was time to remind Razu who you were and who he was not.
Before you walked out of the room you looked back at Ray once more then hardened your features and resolve. Once you walked into the large living room of the opulent hacienda-style property you found Razu sitting in the largest seat in the room which was made from a slew of precious materials. One leg was crossed over the other with his ankle resting atop his knee and in his hands he played with a machete.
Your femme fetales assembled behind you in an arrowhead formation, the five of them flanking each other’s left and right. With his tamed beard, dark and smooth skin, and dangerous eyes Razu slowly broke out into a toothy smile.
“Come on Aria. I am not the enemy no need for the famous formation.”
His voice was smooth and silky like a goading predator slinking its way around to find an opening.
“I don't know Razu. You come unannounced--.”
“And unwelcomed,” Keturah added.
Razu's eyes turned to slits as he glared at Keturah.
“I suggest you keep your femmes in line or something fatal will happen to one of the pretty bitches,” Razu said.
You pulled your guns with quickness and closed the space between you to then press one gun to his temple and the other under his chin.
“Say one more fucking word about or to my femmes and the only fatal thing happening is your death by fatality. One hair on any of their heads is worth so much more than your entire existence. So, tread very, very carefully.”
The fire is Razu's eyes blazed uncontrollably. You saw how badly he wanted to speak again and retaliate but the facts were simple. You were your father's daughter. His empire would be yours soon and no matter how badly Razu wanted it he would never get it. Not by challenge, not by infiltration, and definitely not by arranged marriage.
The fire in his eyes faded and a smile spread across his face.
“Easy Aria, I simply came to make sure you were all right. The dens in LA heard you were in town. They said a lot was shaken up and the dens had to close up ranks to stay off the radar.”
You pulled back and walked back to your girls who hadn't moved an inch. They knew you were more than capable of taking care of Razu. Once in place, you spoke.
“Did your spies actually see me in LA or are they spreading false rumors?”
“Rumors? So, you weren't in LA?”
“Are you questioning me Razu? It sounds like you are but I am sure I am wrong because in order to be remotely qualified to do that, you have to be someone higher than me. Right girls?”
They each replied with confirmation. Razu's jaw clenched tightly and you knew just how badly he wanted to lash out. Smiling you watched him struggle. This was fun. It had been a while since you had fun and you realized how much you missed this.
“Why is it always rank with you?”
“Because you forget your fucking place! You are merely a sergeant in this den. One of many. You do not question me, you do not threaten me, and you definitely do not demand of me.”
“Your safety is important,” Razu carefully added.
“My safety? Do I look unsafe?”
You turned to your friends so they could inspect.
“You look safe to me,” Lyn said.
“Sure do,” Jada added
“Picture of health,” Milla chimed in.
You turned back to Razu. “I feel safe so I say you have nothing to worry about.”
Razu stared you down clearly upset this wasn't turning out the way he wanted. When you cocked your head to the side and then nudged it toward the exit Razu grumbled but stood.
“I'll head home and tell The Viper that baby Viper is doing well in Mexico.”
Your father didn't know where you were right now and you knew that Razu still suspected you had gone to the States which meant his reporting your current whereabouts would imply you had in fact been in the States. You kept your face unreadable.
“You do that. You'd just be giving him news he already knew, but whatever.”
You shrugged then examined your nails playing up how unbothered you were. As Razu walked toward the front door he chuckled.
“I'll see you at home, little Viper.”
No one moved until you heard the door close. Before they spoke you walked out of the room across the estate.
“Have them scour that room for bugs. I don't trust Razu.”
Milla nodded and walked off to get it done.
“He has definitely overstepped his bounds,” Lyn said.
“He sure has but he just revealed he has spies within our dens. I am sure my father would love to know that.”
The only great threat to queens were peasants thinking they were smarter. Your father ran a tight ship and usually got rid of those who had the balls to have big ideas. Razu's days were numbered.
“If he is going home now then he will be sure to paint a horrible picture before you arrive. We should leave tonight,” Uki proposed.
She made sense and it was probably the best move. Only 2 things were wrong. Ray was still not out of the woods yet and if you went back in a hurry Razu would know you were afraid of something. 
“Have someone watch Razu until he leaves. I want to know if he so much as pisses and it's not yellow.”
You walked away up the stairs while putting the safety back on your guns and repositioning them in the waistband of your jeans. Halfway back to the bedroom where Ray was—your bedroom you had a thought that if you took Razu out here and now When you walked inside he was still lying on the bed which was a relief and disappointment all at once. You were glad Razu hadn't tried to lure you downstairs to have his men search the house, but more worried Ray was still unconscious. You knew the longer he remained so the worse his prognosis.
You pressed your back to the door and took some deep breaths and tried to push the annoyance of Razu out of your head. Every day your list of problems increased. You felt the stinging prickle of tears behind your eyes. They were tears you’d held in for so long, tears you didn’t dare shed, tears you knew would find their way down your cheeks one way or another.
You walked across the room to the side of the bed and peered down at Ray. His bandaged wounds were speckled with bright red blood reminding you how close he’d come to dying. The even rise and fall of his chest said his breathing was evened out and he was probably not in too much danger. You sat at the edge of the bed as the urge to touch him became stronger than ever. You brought your hand closer and closer to the tattoo swooped across his chest. Your eyes locked on the ‘A’ within the ‘KingHarbor’ tattoo and within seconds you could make something else written there.
You leaned closer and closer bringing your face right over his chest and it was then you saw it. Hidden within the ‘A’ was your name. Aria.
“No fucking way,” you whispered.
You turned to the nightstand ready to switch on the lamp for more light but an empty tabletop caught your eye. The cock of the gun and the warm press to your forehead said you’d caught it too late.
“Back—the fuck—up!”
You huffed a breath out half relief half annoyance. Slowly you moved back.
“Who the fuck are you?”
You turned to face him and saw the moment recognition hit him. The stone-cold set of his face turned to wide-eyed disbelief.
“A—Aria?”
“It’s me, Ray.”
Your voice was small. You hadn’t meant for it to be at all, but it was, small and timid. Ray’s expression went from disbelief to blazing fury. You brought your eyes to the gun still pressed to your forehead.
“You’re gonna shoot me with my own gun huh.”
“I can think of a reason or two why I should,” Ray gritted out through clenched jaws.
You could hear the pain in his voice. Sighing, you shook your head. You weren’t afraid of him.
“Put the gun down, Ray.”
“Like hell I will.”
You glared at each other for long moments. You got lost in the amount of hatred you saw in his eyes. He’d never looked at you like this before, never pressed a gun to your head either. You sighed again then used the move he taught you to unarm him. However, he did not let you have your way instead, he grabbed your wrist pulled you to him, and attempted to swivel you so he could put you in a chokehold. Evading the move, you in turn swung your legs over him and sat on his thighs.
“Stop! You’re going to bust your stitches!”
Ray didn’t listen. He still fought you as if he didn’t have three bullet holes in his body.
“Ray!”
He reached for the knives in your thigh holster but you grabbed his arm instead. When he tried to use his other hand to reach for your gun you stopped him. That was when the door banged open and your Femmes rushed in guns and chosen weapons drawn to see you straddling him and holding his wrists. It looked kinky.
“Uh—didn’t waste any time huh,” Milla teased.
Ray yanked his arm away then rammed the heel of his palm into your gut. He hadn’t used all his force, but he’d used enough to send you to the foot of the bed. The action took you by surprise and stole the wind from your lungs. Your femmes cocked and raised their guns and weapons.
“Stand down,” you choked out.
Ray laid there looking at the six of you as if he didn’t trust any of you and was expecting one or all of you to make a move any second.
“Are you okay?”
You raised to your feet then rested your hands over your knee while you tried to catch your breath.
“Fine.”
“You let him catch you off guard?”
You glared at Uki.
“Didn’t expect him to—pull my own gun on me.”
“Where the fuck am I and what the fuck is going on?”
“Thu, what a way to speak to the people who you owe your life to,” Lyn spat.
“What’re you talking about?”
Your eyes fell to the bandages that were speckled red before. Now they were soaked with his blood.
“Shit, you busted the stitches,” you said making a move to him.
Ray lurched back. “Stay away from me!”
“If I do that you’ll bleed out and after everything we did to keep you alive, I’ll be pretty pissed about it.”
He surveilled you then the other five women in the room trying to gauge the level of trust he could muster in this moment.
“If we wanted to kill you, we would have stayed in our country while your so-called heist went all the way to shit,” Jada said.
“What the fuck does that mean?”
You looked at Jada slightly annoyed she brought it up already.
“Later.”
“No, now!”
“The heist went south. Enson, Bosco, they’re all dead,” you carefully broke.
“Wh—what!?”
“Donnie ran a play in your heist. He knew all the players set it up with them and used you guys as the muscle. He set you up to take the heat and fall so he could take the money. Nick knew everything from him. Your life is burned. They shot the others and Nick would have got you too if we hadn’t gotten there in time,” you explained ripping off the rest of the band-aide.
His face was blank as he processed your words then the rage returned.
“Donnie that motherfucker!”
“That he is.”
Silence filled the room and slowly you got closer and closer to him. Once close enough you sat on the edge of the bed.
“Your only option now is to disappear and by disappear I mean dead man disappear,” you finished.
“Why the fuck should I trust you?”
It was a fair question.
“She risked her fucking life to save yours. She did all this for you!”
You looked back to your girls and shook your head hoping to disengage the situation.
“It’s okay guys, wait outside.”
“So he can try something? Like hell,” Jada voiced.
“He has three bullet holes in him. I’m sure I can take him.”
They nodded knowing you could then one by one exit the room. When it was just the two of you, you opened your mouth to speak but Ray beat you to it.
“You should leave too.”
“You’re bleeding. Let me redress those then I’ll go.”
He took a few moments to contemplate your words then nodded. You kept your actions slow and careful as you got closer then took off the soaked bandages. When you wiped at the wounds he barely flinched or made a sound. You could feel his eyes boring into you keeping an eye on every move you made. You knew he didn’t trust you and you understood completely.
With needle and thread in hand, you began stitching him again. Still, Ray remained quiet the whole time he watched you. Whenever you reached for something you felt him tense underneath you even more than when you worked. Was he really that leery of you?
“Where am I?”
“Mexico.”
He scoffed. “Mexico. Is this where you’ve been living it up in a Mexican hacienda?”
“Living it--,” you began but trailed off. Before you spoke again, you scoffed. “No.”
“Right. Is this your place?”
“It—belongs to my father.”
You peeped up and met his eyes and instantly regretted it. His eyes were cold, dead, and filled with anger.
“And those women? Who are they?”
You tied off the thread then reached for the alcohol bottle on the side table.
“This is going to hurt.”
In your other hand, you took up the tequila there and held it out to him.
“No. Go ahead,” Ray said not even trying to hide the distrust in his eyes.
You shrugged and took a chug from the tequila bottle then poured the alcohol. You watched Ray stiffen as the burn rushed through him. The veins in his neck and forehead pulsated just beneath his skin, his face got redder and the muscles all across his torso flexed and bulged giving you a show for the first time how much he'd changed. Before you right now was a very grown man, a very gorgeous grown man, a man you probably didn't know anymore. His groan cane out agonized and tight. Wanting to help you leaned forward and blew onto the freshly stitched and taut skin hoping to provide some relief for him.
You kept your eyes level with his chest and focused on blowing in a way that kept the air coming from you cool. You took up the cloth and dabbed the excess antiseptic from his bruised flesh taking care to be gentle the closer you got to his wounds. You happened to glance up and found his eyes on you. The anger in his eyes was gone as was the right clench of his jaw. He looked as if he were in some sort of trance. You didn't stop blowing but moved for the wound salve waiting to be applied on the table. Slowly, you spread some across each bullet wound. With every touch, Ray sucked in a breath like a startled gasp. You didn't know if it was entirely from the pain he had to have been on or something else.
By the time you taped down a few thick squares of gauze, the door banged open.
“Ah, you're awake. Good,” Manolo exclaimed. “How is he, Aria?”
“He busted open his stitches so I did the whole song and dance and voila,” you explained.
“It looks good. How do you feel amigo?”
“Who are you?”
“The doctor who helped save your life,” Manolo dryly said.
“This is Manolo. I've known him most of my life. He's a good doctor and an even better man,” you informed as you moved from his side to rinse your hands in the bowl of water beside the bed.
“How do you feel?”
“Like I've been shot.”
“Oh, my friend you have been…3 times. One of them was centimeters from your lung, another a hair from puncturing your heart. Jeez, I don't know which angel you have looking out for you but I need her.”
Manolo approached him and began taking his vitals, you sifted to the back of the room to watch on. Ray's eyes slipped from you to Manolo then back to you as if he expected either of you to make a move against him. Was this because of you or had prison made him this way? Milla slipped inside and came to stand beside you. She now had Ray's full attention. With her voice low, she spoke.
“Razu has men watching the hacienda from all directions. If we plan on leaving without him knowing there is only one option.”
You nodded and locked eyes with Ray.
“Is he ready to move Manolo?”
“He’s a walking miracle. I think he's good to fly.”
“I'm not going anywhere with you people.”
All eyes moved to him each with different emotions radiating from them. You sighed.
“Do you think you have a choice?”
Ray narrowed his eyes at Milla's question.
“Yeah, I do. I don't know you from Adam.”
“What else do you need to know besides I--.”
The door opened and the rest of your Femmes walked in and flanked your side assuming formation without even realizing it.
“We saved your life,” Milla continued.
“Enough. This is Milla, Lyn, Jada, and Uki. These are my Femme Fetales, you explained.
“Femme Fetales? What's with the name?”
“Let's hope you never have to find out,” Keturah slid in.
“If you don't come with us, what's your plan? Go back to LA? Wander around alone? Get into some more shit with some more untrustworthy fucks?”
“Those were my brothers! And now they're fucking gone!”
“I know and I know what a deep cut that is. I know you're angry but being angry doesn't mean you have to be stupid. I don't think you get it. Right now your only option is to disappear. No, returning to LA, no lone wolf shit.”
He studied you and you could see the storm of emotions swirling inside of him. He was rightfully angry. His world shifted yet again. When he didn't speak for a few minutes you sighed again.
“Well stay one more night, give you some time to think it over. If tomorrow you decide you still don't want to go with us then fine. You be on your way and we'll be on ours no questions no debates.���
“Aria,” Uki began but you held your hand up to stop her.
“Everyone out.”
“Would you like something for the pain?”
Ray shook his head and watched everyone pour out of the room one by one. When it was just you, he raised a brow.
“You too.”
You scoffed having half expected it. As you walked to the door he watched you. Before leaving you looked back at him.
“The windows have sensory alarms so they’re sensitive to touch and movement, you’re also three stories up. Patrol outside might miss you if you jump but the perimeter patrol won’t. You’re free to leave but use the front door. It’s safest. Say goodbye first.”
“Like you did?”
For the second time, you felt as if you’d been kicked in the gut and gotten the wind knocked out of you. Low blow, you thought as you nodded and left him. Pressing your back to the door you took several calming breaths and then walked down the hall to the kitchen. You needed a drink—bad!
~~~~~~~
-The Next Day-
“Did you sleep at all?”
You scoffed as you filled your coffee cup with freshly brewed Pu-erh tea. With the sleep you hadn’t been getting and the day ahead that you foresaw, you desperately needed it.
“Sleep? Don’t know her.”
Keturah snorted and shook her head. “I don’t know how you do it.”
You took a lengthy sip from the cup and moaned. “God that’s good.”
“Morning workout?”
“Just a little meet-up with the punching bag.”
“Ah, is this aggression release or sexual tension release?”
You snorted and shook your head before you took another sip from your mug.
“He is ripped, Aria.”
“That he is.”
“He is also a distrustful ingrate,” she added.
You laughed.
“The only reason he is getting a pass is because his friends are gone and he almost died.”
“He doesn’t trust me,” you solemnly said.
You could wallow in it, matter of fact you had already. The entire night you wallowed and sulked because his distrust of you was so evident, so strong that it tore you apart. You’d wallowed until you were at dirt level. Now, in the light of morning, you couldn’t afford to anymore.
“You sure he’s still up there?”
“If he can plan to break into the reserve and steal millions of dollars I am sure he can manage to sneak out of somewhere without raising alarms,” you said.
“Legend,” Keturah muttered.
He sure was. If Donnie hadn’t been a little asshole this heist would have gone down as an incredible legend. It was practically flawless. As Keturah filled you in on any new developments you flitted around the kitchen to put together some breakfast for him. The others rolled into the kitchen and brought you up to date with the new developments but then the conversation shifted to plans and prep to leave. When you gave the go-ahead to get ready to take off in an hour, you walked out with a tray full of food on your way to Ray’s room.
As you stood outside you contemplated if you should just try the door or knock first. You reached for the handle, turned, and cocked your head to the side when you realized it was open. With caution, you walked inside and found Ray walking out of the bathroom, shirtless with a towel hung low around his waist. What was air? You no longer knew because it ceased to enter your lungs. Your jaw hung open and eyes roamed all the skin on display. You remembered Keturah’s words from minutes ago and though you’d agreed then, those words were now your gospel. He was ripped like no one’s business.
“Holy shit,” you mumbled.
“No knock?’
You met his eyes then realized what you were doing. “Ehm. Sorry. I uh—I honestly didn’t expect you to still be in here.”
“You and me both,” Ray answered.
“Well, I brought you poison-free breakfast. Freshly made and still hot.”
You placed the tray on the bed then backed up when you felt him walking toward the food. He looked over the tray then at you then back at the food. You watched him ease down onto the bed then dig into the double stacks of pancakes, eggs, sausage, and tater tots. When he dipped a matter tot into the grape jelly you smiled, comforted that at least that was the same. The man loved his sweets.
You didn't know how long you stood there watching him eat but in no time at all the plate was empty and he was gulping down the tea you'd given him.
“Tea is not my thing.”
“I know but you were just shot and still recovering caffeine is on the list of no foods for a while longer.”
Ray stared at you with squinted eyes and underneath the scrutiny of his eyes you has to look away but your eyes went back to his body. God he looked good, you thought. Again your eyes went to the “A” part of his chest tat and stared.  He'd tattooed your name on him. If he'd done that he couldn’t hate you could he?
“What game are you playing? Whatever it is I don't want any parts of it this time,” Ray said, draining the hot tea.
“I'm not playing any game, never have.”
“Right.”
You'd had enough. “Look say what you gotta say, I've had enough with the passive-aggressive you. Speak your heart, because we gotta move. I don't like being away from home after a job for too long.”
“Home? Funny I thought LA was your home, that I was…”
He trailed off leaving the words unspoken but still felt.
“Guess things change.  You had no problem leaving LA and staying gone for 10 years. Had no problem letting me take the fall, the time, and all that came with it! No problem using me!”
“Okay, you wanna do this now? Fine!”
You pulled up a chair and sat in front of him. “I never used you. I also never asked you to take the fall for me. That was you, Ray!”
“Bullshit! You made a fucking choice and it wasn't me.”
“You told me to run. I ran.”
“Without hesitation you sure did.”
“Oh come on Ray! You don't know how hard that was for me. You have no idea what the fuck I've been through because of that night,” you spat.
“You!? I went to fucking prison Aria. Me! You disappeared. You never visited, never wrote, never called. Nothing! It was me doing the time alone. Me dealing with all that shit for 10 years. You abandoned me!”
His words hurt like 10 thousand blades slicing at your heart. He really had no idea and was just fine looking to the worst as the explanation.  The fury rolling off of him doused your anger. In a way, you guessed it was true. You had disappeared. You didn't call, write or visit. You did run when he told you to. Everything he said was true at surface level.
“I didn't want to leave you, Ray. I wanted to stay and take my chances, serve the time with you.”
“Bullshit! Don't fucking lie to me Aria. I've had 10 years to sit with your lies. 10 years to comb through every lie you said, every lie you weaved into your movements, every lie spoken with your touch. The ledger is in the red, Aria. You can never pay it!”
He was right. You couldn't make up for what happened. It was too late too much had happened. You'd been stupid to think that if you just showed up again things would work themselves out. Even if he knew the whole story nothing would change. You clenched your jaw trying to stop yourself from crying.
“I'm sorry.”
Ray scoffed harshly.
“Fuck your sorries. They mean jack shit.”
This one wasn't a blade. It was a bullet and it made dead center impact. Unable to control yourself you stood and stalked to the door keeping your face turned from him. Before you walked out you stopped and took a breath.
“We're wheels up in an hour. The choice is yours on what to do.”
You grabbed the doorknob and half walked out but stopped again. “Every word I've ever said to you, every action, every touch, every single moment was never a lie. I got you. ‘Till the end imma ride wit’ you. I meant that on everything.”
You rushed from the room knowing you were seconds from exploding with every emotion you'd caged in the last 10 years. You zipped past your girls who'd no doubt heard the shouting and hightailed it to the shooting range under the house where you fired round after round at nearly every target there hitting dead center every time. As you released bullet after bullet tear after tear fell filling the endless well you now knew you'd carry the rest of your life.
An hour later you'd pulled yourself together and were clean, dressed, and strapped up ready to face your shit like the grown-ass woman you were and the queen you were set to become.
“Everything good?
“Yep. Is everyone here?”
No one answered which told me Ray wasn't here. You nodded and took a slow breath in.
“Did you give him the heist money and some gear?”
“An hour ago,” Uki replied.
“All right then. Let's go home.”
You pressed the elevator button and the doors opened.
“Where is home?”
Ray's deep baritone washed over you stunning you still.
“Why?”
“I would like to know where I'm going before I get there,” he answered.
Your head snapped back to him and your eyes locked. Hope swirled within you and it was stronger than any other emotion. It truly was dangerous.
“Nigeria.”
His brow crooked. “Hm, I've always liked the heat.”
“Let's see if you can take it, white boy,” Jada teased.
They all giggled and you caught a ghost of a smile on Ray's lips and your stomach flipped. Shit, you thought. You didn't need this right now.
“You have your money. Why not just take it and go?”
“I still might but right now I have nowhere I need to be.”
You nodded, hearing the words between his words.
“Let's move.”
You got in the elevator and everyone else piled in after you. Once under the compound you took to the escape tunnel and followed the 2 miles until you climbed back to ground level where the truck waited. After loading the bags, you sped away knowing Razu would have never seen this move coming.
It didn't take long to get to the jet and when you were securely in the air and exiting Mexican airspace you began to breathe more freely. For the first hour or so Ray kept to himself. He didn't speak or interact he just watched everything. It was a strength of his and soothing he'd honed in the services. By the time hour 4 came around Milla, Lyn, and Keturah had pulled him into a card game where they grossly took advantage until he got the hang of it. Then the tides turned in his favor.
Slowly he looked like he was beginning to fit in, and it made you relax a little more. Four and a half hours after takeoff, you were landing toward the coast where you would take a boat to the compound. Being the serviceman he was, Ray constantly checked the perimeter with one hand on his gun and the other hooked in the bulletproof vest he wore. He looked like a fish out of water amongst the backdrop of dessert colored dirt, rocky mountains, and free-roaming elephants, Zebras, and Antelope but at the same time, he looked like he belonged. Perhaps that was wishful thinking.
“Home, oh!”
You looked out to the palatial compound that rivaled the vastness of The Alamo and smiled. While you felt like a caged bird at times you loved being home.
“That is home?”
“Home sweet home,” Lyn added.
“Jesus, who are you people?”
They giggled while you focused on your return. You could already see movement and knew everyone around was gathering. Once the boat docked you unloaded and made your way to the walls. The men on patrol there were starting at Ray like he had three heads.
“Ehm!”
The guards shook out of their stupor and then opened the gate allowing you to enter. As you walked through, they saluted you with the respect you deserved. However, before you made it to the house you heard the murmurs of the arrival of the man you knew you'd have to answer to sooner or later. Everyone around except for you and Ray dropped to one knee while bending one arm at the elbow and clenching a tight fist. Your father's salute. You looked to Ray he was clearly confused but not intimidated.
The 6-and-a-half-foot man approached you with a stern look on his face and dressed like the world's best businessman. When he stood in front of you, Ray still didn't drop to his knee. You didn't know if it was ignorance of who was before him or indifference. If it was indifference, you were highly turned on. As your father eyed you trying to intimidate you into submitting you stood there head high, eyes locked on his not wavering. Your father's eyes shifted to Ray and you took a sidestep to stand in front of him.
“I'm home baba.”
Your father’s eyebrow crooked. “Baba? You still recognize me as your baba? You still recognize me as the leader of this organization?!”
Everyone continued to murmur as they felt the air shift from his anger.
“Of course.”
He scoffed. “I explicitly told you to stay out of the States. I told you that you can't break him out. I told you so many things and they were all ignored by you. All disobeyed!”
“Baba, I couldn't just sit here anymore. I had to.”
He stared at you, eyes still blazing with anger but slowly his features cooled. “You accomplished it too, I am impressed.”
You smiled.
“But what if I would have lost you? What then? Did you plan that far in your elaborate schemes?”
“You raised me and I had my Femme Fetales, how could you lose me?”
He sighed, shook his head then cupped your cheek. “You are of my blood, I don't know why I was surprised. I'm surprised it took you this long.”
You smirked.
“Fine.”
Your Father's eyes shifted back to Ray who was still standing.
“Still standing I see.”
“I bow to no one,” Ray defiantly exclaimed in that nonchalant voice of his.
Your father cocked his brow then laughed heartily. “Is that so?”
“Viper, it's been settled,” one of the men informed bowing his has to your father.
Ray's eyes went wide. “Viper? As in The Viper? The most feared and respected man in the game? The man who is at the top of everyone's wanted list and who has a hand and foot in every country and every market? That viper?”
Your father looked impressed. “And if I was that Viper?”
Ray looked at you then back to your father. “Then you'd have a lot more of my respect.”
He laughed again. “Interesting. Still standing?”
“I told you; I bow to no one.”
Your father smirked. “If you stay here when she takes over I can't wait to see you eat those words.”
He and Ray squared off both stating the other down as if sizing each other up. You knew your father was trying to gauge what kind of a man he was and get a feel of what value he posed. Usually, he was a great judge of character, but you wondered if he’d be biased because of the past, because of what Ray was to you.
“Everyone back to work.”
All the soldiers began walking away clearing the center but when you began to move he spoke again. “Everyone except Ray. We have plenty to talk about.”
You once again leaped in front of Ray shielding him. “No way.”
His eyes dipped down to yours and he mischievously smirked. “Why?”
“Because I know you. To punish me and prove a point you would kill him.”
Your father put his hand over his chest. “You wound me, princess. I promise I won’t kill him much less lay a hand on him. However, if he can’t so little as take a beating then maybe he’s not an asset here.”
“Baba he’s already taken 3 bullets, 2 came close to his heart and lung.”
“And I’ve taken a bullet right in the head and I lived to talk about it and run this empire. Near a lung and heart is child’s play.”
You opened your mouth to counter, but your father’s voice boomed over yours. “Either I talk to him alone now or I will see if he can take a bullet to the head and live. What’s 4 bullets?”
You knew better than to push him. He was your father, and he was soft on you, but he was still in charge. You hated it when he threw his weight around like this. Gritting your teeth, you sidestepped.
“Go and make sure everything is okay with the mission for tomorrow night.”
With one more glance at Ray, then your father you walked off. If Ray was going to survive here he had to learn how to fend for himself. What better opponent to start with than the king himself?
-Ray-
The fucking viper. He’d heard countless stories of this man’s empire. In LA there were plenty of his viper dens, plenty of his people dealing in so much shit. His gambling den was always packed and usually, the place everyone went for information, and that was just one of his businesses. He’d had no idea his reach came this far. Africa. Holy shit, he thought. They’d walked to a more secluded part of the compound, a part that looked like a luxury desert oasis.
He watched Viper sit, pull out something wrapped in brown paper then light it. With one puff came another and another until he was surrounded by white fragrant smoke. He took a deep breath in. It had been a long time since he’d had one of these. With parole checks and shit like that, he had to stay clean of everything.
“Here. Live a little.”
He held a similar one to him. He took it and mirrored his actions until he’d taken one long puff of his own. He groaned long and loud which brought a laugh from the giant’s mouth across from him.
“10 long years without one huh.”
He took in this man in a designer suit, diamonds, and gold. He had no idea you knew The Viper. It dawned on him then that he probably didn’t know anything about you anymore.
“I will give you one piece of advice and a warning all wrapped in one. Never have daughters because they will cripple you worse than any bullet ever could.”
Once he’d said the words it didn’t take him long to piece it together. Daughter.
“Aria is your daughter.”
He nodded. “She didn’t tell you.”
He sighed and took another lengthy puff. “One of many things I’m sure. I’m not surprised anymore.”
“Sounds a lot like animosity.”
He sighed but remained silent. He was bitter—very bitter.
“I’m sorry about your brothers. I know a loss like that—is a serious blow especially not being able to say goodbye.”
He balled his free hand. he’d hit the nail right on the head.
“If I know Aria and I do, she’s already found your snitch and he’ll be gift-wrapped to you by tonight.”
He snapped his eyes to the viper. “What’re you talking about?”
He sighed and blew out a puff of smoke. “I suppose it’s time to come clean.”
A few moments passed in silence, and he waited as patiently as he could.
“12 years ago I knew the moment you met, and I knew from that moment every move either of you made. I knew every secret rendezvous, every phone call, text message, every mini heist, every small job, every crazy scheme, and plan. Aria had no clue I knew and though I was leery about you, hell any man who wanted my daughter’s attention. She’s my only child and the future of this empire. But I like to give her small freedoms, so I let her live, I let her think she was living this secret life and I kept watch as the two of you fell in love—to my complete dislike. Of all people, a white boy oh.”
He kissed his teeth, then sighed. “I thought—hoped it would be young love, a fling, but I knew the night she shielded you from that vato, we’d move way past that.”
His interest was piqued but his gut rolled as if he knew he wouldn’t like what came next.
“The night of that lift off the PerriP crew I had my most trusted guys watching her. I knew the deeper in she got with you the more risk she would take. So when the shit hit the fan and you guys figured out there was a snitch you got cornered. They reported it to me, and I relayed my orders. Get her out at all costs.”
He paused again to take another drag from the substance lit between his fingers.
“When you told her to run, and you decided to burn yourself to save her I knew she would have stayed right there with you no matter what. You got separated it wasn’t because she actually ran. my men came in and sedated her to get her out.”
Everything felt like it collapsed then, his vision went tunnel, heart pounded painfully and loudly.
“What!?”
“My men followed my orders and when she came to, she killed several good men in an effort to get back to you. Of course, I couldn’t allow that. Within 2 hours, she was on the jet back here.”
As his heart thudded more painfully he pressed his hand over it. All this time, he thought.
“For the last 10 years, she’s been forbidden from making contact, forbidden from stepping foot in the States, forbidden from doing anything that he didn’t approve of. She hated my order and rebelled like hell. For years she hated me. I’m sure she still hates me for it, but I knew without a doubt that she would have served that stint with you. As her father, I couldn’t allow that.”
In the span of five minutes, his entire world had shifted. Everything he believed was flipped.
“You may resent me for it but, even knights are meant to be sacrificed for the queen.”
He met your father’s eyes and saw aloofness. He didn’t look remorseful, but he could see something that he thought was close. He wasn’t sorry nor did he regret his decisions, but he felt badly.
“Since the day she landed here, she’s been keeping tabs on you. She knew about your life on the inside and kept her ears to the ground so she knew when to step in if she had to. She was the reason you only served 10 instead of the 20 they wanted to give you. She wanted to break you out, but I wouldn’t allow it because that move would jeopardize my empire because of all the moving parts and people in law enforcement and government it would have taken. I don’t like to cash in debts.”
As your father spoke he sat there thinking about the last 10 to 12 years of his life. The happy years with you then the darkness of the last 10.
“She knew about your heist plan, knew about Donnie but she let it play out because she had a bigger plan. She managed to be one step ahead of everything and executed her plans seamlessly. She went against me and my orders and put the entire den in jeopardy just to step in and save you. She did all this for one man.”
He sounded as if he were in disbelief.
“Were you worth it?”
He scoffed. Was he?
“I see a lot of myself in you. Your ferocity, brains, drive, creativity, and foresight, I see so much potential for you here. I’m impressed with what you can offer the den. I always have been. Now that she’s gone through all this effort it is clear to me that how she felt then never died, it lives still. The proof has always been clear to me though I was reluctant to accept it. She is my princess, and no one is worthy of her. However, it’s become time for me to step aside and let her choose who stands beside her. I’ll offer you a spot in my empire, a place in the Den of Vipers, but the role is up Aria.”
He couldn’t believe his ears. All these years, all this time. Everything he’d thought was real wasn’t, everything was wrong. Your father stood then patted him on his shoulders.
“Take some time to think about it. Let me know when you’ve decided.”
With that, he walked off leaving him sitting there in this oasis with a head full of thoughts and a heart aching in more ways than one.
-Aria-
It had been nearly 2 hours now. What the fuck could they be talking about for so long? Being home you were supposed to be at ease but during your soak in the tub, you hadn't felt any ease. You were as tense and worried as ever. Not even half a bottle of rum had helped. You paced your room in your mid-thigh length robe as you thought about your options. Your father was pissed with you but you knew he wouldn't be too harsh. If you interrupted whatever they were doing he wouldn't punish you for it.
With your mind made up you flung your door open the gasped seeing Ray standing on the other side. Immediately he took your breath away. Mere hours ago, his eyes still held anger and mistrust in them. Now they were softer. What in the world had happened?
“Uh…what’re you doing here?”
“We need to talk.”
You crooked your brow. Now he wanted to talk? Without waiting for your reply, Ray walked into your bedroom leaving you stunned. He couldn’t wait to get away from you before, now he was barging into the viper's den. After closing the door, you cautiously walked in. Ray was at the window scanning the perimeter. When he turned his eyes roamed over you taking in your attire. When he realized how little you had on, he turned his head then breathed out heavily.
“How did you find me?”
“I asked.”
“And everyone was so willing to give you, an outsider, the location of--.”
“The next Viper in line to rule?”
You took him in. Your father had told him.
“Your father must have given me the green light around here,” he said.
“What? After 1 conversation? What in the hell did you talk about? Did he pull a gun on you?”
“Nope. He gave me some weed.”
You gaped then shook your head because it sounded like something your father would do. “So, he gave you weed then approved your access, and bam here you are.”
“10 years of secrets. Don’t you think it’s time to come clean?”
You studied him for a few moments then sat at the foot of your bed.
“What’re you talking about?”
“I did 10 years for you. The least you could do is be honest.”
“You keep saying that like I made you take the fall, like--.”
“Like you didn’t leave me?”
“Ray you told me to run. I did!”
“Yeah, you did. You ran never looked back then disappeared.”
You pinched your nose bridge then pressed across your forehead. He had no idea.
“If I looked back I knew I wouldn’t be able to leave. I knew that we’d both get caught and then we’d both be fucked. I wanted to go back so bad Ray. I knew I could convince my father to plan a jailbreak for you before any sentencing even happened but then some of my father’s men grabbed me and the next thing I knew I was on a plane halfway across the ocean. I tried to get back. I swear I did but--.”
“Even knights are meant to be sacrificed for the queen,” Ray said in such a way that an eerie feeling washed over you.
He’d talked to your father. Those were his exact words to you when you tried to plead your case to go back for Ray or even plan a jailbreak. He’d told him everything.
“He told you.”
“Yeah, he told me.”
“And you’re still angry with me? Why?”
“There is nothing and no one that could keep me away from you. All it took was daddy’s words for you to give up on me.”
You sprang to your feet then, anger bubbling in your gut. “You don’t know my father. He would have killed you just so you weren’t a distraction for me anymore. I stayed away to keep you alive. I didn’t give up on shit. All these years I’ve been watching. All these years I’ve been trying to keep you safe. Do you have any fucking idea how exhausted I am?!”
“I don’t need your fucking protection Aria! I didn’t then and I don’t now! I—I fucking needed you!”
Your eyes were locked on his, jaw tight as a slew of emotions swirled within you. Ray was the kind of man who was quiet but expressive. When you were together those 2 years he wasn’t overtly expressive about his feelings. What he didn’t say in words, he said in plenty of other ways. However, when he used words he always took your breath away. Now, today was no different.
Slowly you watched his eyes fill with something else other than anger. Something—heart-wrenching.
“I needed you on visiting days. I needed you at nights. I needed you in the depressing darkness of the hole. I needed you in every fight, every attempt someone made to prove I was weak. I needed to know I still had you.”
Ray turned from you and looked out of the window again. Your tears fell from your eyes, and it hit you then. Yes, he was angry with you, but he was angrier at the situation you found yourselves in. Where you’d had 10 years to accept the shit, he’d just had it all flung at him. Ray’s shoulders were slouched, hanging low as if he now had all the world’s weight on them.
You wanted to touch him, but you were scared he’d shrug you off. So, you kept your distance but after a few minutes the urge became too strong, and you slowly crossed the room until you stood right behind him. Raising your hand, it took forever to close the space to his shoulder. When you laid your hand on his skin, he didn’t move or lash out.
“I felt like such a fucking fool to have burned myself for you. I took you disappearing as you proving how untrue you were that you didn’t mean anything you said. I hated you so much. I wished such horrible things on you but with every horrible wish, I felt worse and worse. I hated myself and--.”
You dipped under one of his arms that were pressed on the windowpane and came face to face with him. Holding his face in your hands you found the last of your courage.
“I’m sorry,” you whispered.
Ray raised his eyes and peered into your tear-filled ones. You repeated the words you’d wanted to say for years. You said them again and again and with each apology Ray melted. The tension in his shoulders crumbled.
“I’m sorry,” Ray croaked out.
It was your turn to melt. Within seconds of those words escaping his lips, you both crashed into one another, lips colliding for the first time in a decade. You’d often wondered if this was possible after everything, and if it were, how would it happen. Would it be slow and tender, teasing, and hesitant? It was neither. Ray kissed you with a hardness that wasn’t there 10 years ago. He kissed you as if he loved you and hated you all at once like he wanted to suck the very air from your lungs to have a piece of you with him always or to kill you so no one could ever have you. His kiss was delightful and torture, familiar but foreign.
Your lips and tongues wrestled never remaining still for long. He swirled his around yours, and you sucked his until he groaned. When Ray pressed your back against the window the hardness of his body made you whimper. This was the body of a fully grown man, not some young adult. You wrapped your arms around his neck and pulled him closer. In response, Ray dipped down and lifted you into the air so you could wrap your legs around his waist.
All of this was muscle memory. Your body never forgot him. How could it? He’d been your first in so many things. You bit down on his bottom lip dragging a fierce groan from him. Ray pressed into you giving you the first feel of his hardness.
“Fuck!”
Like a command received, Ray quickly yanked open your robe then cupped your breasts. His hands were rough, calloused, and larger than you remember. Using his thumbs he flicked your hardened nipples sending jolts of pleasure through you that settled in your core and turned to molten lava.
“Now! I can’t wait anymore,” you rushed out in between kisses.
Ray must have felt the same urgency because he released your breasts then lowered his hands to fumble with his pants. As he freed himself then kicked the pants off they went across the room and banged into one of the lamps bringing it clattering to the floor. With the room in half darkness, Ray locked eyes with you and a second later he split you in half sending his large, thick cock to the hilt.
“Aah! Fuck!”
Ray shuddered as he pressed his forehead to your collar. When he pulled back he rammed himself inside of you again making you throw your head back into the window.
“Ugh!”
His thrusts started slow and punishing. Each quick flick of his hips sent a powerful message that both your brain and body received. You held on to him afraid he’d disappear and you’d realize this was yet another dream. His hands tightened around your hips then he moved you against him, so he was directing his hardness into you the way he wanted, the speed he wanted. Every time he sank into you, your body shook, and goosebumps peppered your skin.
Soon, you both were panting, grunting, and groaning as you fucked right in front of the window not caring who could see. He turned, leaning his back on the wall as he locked eyes with where your bodies were joined.
“Fuck, fuck, fuck! Uuuugh!”
“Fuck me, Ray. Fuck me!”
That was just what he did. His thrusts were unrelenting, his power all-encompassing and with every minute your pleasure became so intense you knew you would break in half once you came. Ray tightened his grip then moved you more forcefully against him losing all control. The veins in his neck protruded as he lost himself to the pleasure you were sure he could only find with you.
You felt him walking across the room then your positioning changed as he sat you on top of him.
“Take all this dick, Aria!”
He slapped your ass, and it was all the encouragement you needed. You planted your hands on his shoulder then slowly lifted your body up only to slide back down. He felt so good. Ray dropped his head back and closed his eyes. Every time he almost slipped from your heat he bit down on his bottom lip. Then when you sank down on him his nose scrunched. Soon you were bouncing on him using the power and skill of your hips and ass.
Ray gripped your derriere, spread your cheeks then thrust up.
“Mmm!”
That one thrust unlocked something inside of you, something rabid and primal. Raising onto your feet you bounced on him increasing your speed until sweat rolled down your bodies. You pressed your lips to his and kissed him with as much heat as you felt within. It was heat he returned.
“Mm, I’ve missed your tight little pussy.”
Locking eyes with him you bit his bottom lip. “Show me.”
Ray stood, pulled you off him then pushed you over the chair so your ass was propped up like a gift for him. Without warning he slammed into you making you fling your head back. Ray’s hand wrapped around your throat as he held you in the position you were in. With your back arched creating a ‘u’ shape along your spine he lowered his lips to your upside-down ones and kissed you senseless. When he pulled his lips from yours he fucked into you with reckless abandon. Every stroke make you shout his name and every time you did he only fucked you harder and harder.
In no time at all you were seeing stars and your body was begging for mercy. You didn’t dare listen though. When you felt his teeth sinking into your shoulder you screamed from the pain but your body convulsed from the pleasure.
“Still like a little pain with your pleasure huh.”
Ray pulled from your body. You turned to him on shaky legs and peered at him through lust-clouded eyes. He hoisted you into the air again then slid you down on his length. Again you kissed him as he began his torturous pleasure all over again. When you tasted copper, you pulled back to realize you’d bitten his lip and drawn blood. Ray smirked then slammed you into a wall and jackhammered into you.
“Yes!”
“Is this still my pussy, Aria?”
“Yes.”
“Do I still own it?”
“Yes!”
“Ah, ah, ah!”
With each thrust, you could feel his body shaking. He was close and you wanted everything from him. You were tired of the last 10 years of longing. You wanted everything now.
“I love you, Ray.”
His brow quirked then his face scrunched and that was when you felt him release deep inside of you. It was a release that triggered yet another orgasm from you and brought darkness with it as your body exploded.
When you opened your eyes you were in your bed naked and sore.
“What the--.”
“Welcome back.”
Beside the bed, Ray sat just as naked as you. It all came back then, and you couldn’t hide the smile that spread across your face.
“Was I too rough?”
You glanced at his chest and saw the blood soaking the bandages. You jerked up. “What happened?”
“I’m fine. Some of the stitches popped.”
You slowly looked around the room and saw everything was in disarray. Lamps were broken on the floor, sheets and clothes littered everywhere, broken glass and furniture were here and there, and blood was smeared on some of the walls and your body.
You snorted, “Just like old times I see.”
Ray smirked.
“I’m sorry,” Ray began.
“Don’t. Let’s stop with the apologies here and now. No more. We missed so much time, so much was missed out on. I don’t want to miss it anymore. I don’t want to keep going like this Ray. I can’t. I miss you so fucking much I can’t breathe. I’ve loved you for 12 years and I don’t see it ever changing.”
Ray walked over to you, his hard cock bobbing in the air. Once beside the bed, he took your hands and raised you to your knees so you were in front of him. When his hand cupped your cheek you melted.
“This is the second time I’ve lost everything. Now I have nothing else, and I don’t want to lose you again. I can’t.”
His hand slid to the back of your neck to cup your skull. “I have loved you since I was 20 years old. A decade later not a damn thing has changed. I will love you for the rest of my life.”
Your tear slipped from your eye and Ray’s thumb swiped it away.
“Do you mean that? Do you forgive me?”
“I mean it.”
Rau brought your face closer and gazed deeper into your eyes.
“‘Till the end Imma ride wit’ you. There’s nothing to forgive.”
You scrunched your face and tried to contain yourself. “Ray,” you whispered, voice full of emotion.
“Tell me again,” he pleased.
You pressed your forehead to his. “I love you Ray Merrimen. “I got you. ‘Till the end Imma ride wit’ you.”
He smiled and then pulled you into a searing kiss, a kiss that revived your very heart and set your soul on fire. This man was all you wanted and all you would ever need.
“Your father offered me a spot here. He said the role is up to you though.
You held your breath waiting for him to finish.
“I want it. So tell me what role you want me to have?”
“You cupped his bearded jaw.
“I want you next to me.”
He smiled then slowly nodded.
“As your knight?”
You pulled him closer.
“As the king in my den because every queen needs a king.”
Ray laid you down then climbed on top of you ready to make you blackout again but a knock on your door stopped him.
“What?”
“It’s here,” Uki’s voice sounded.
You smiled. “I got you a present.”
“What present?”
“Come.”
The two of you dressed, you in your robe and Ray only in his pants. He didn’t even bother cleaning up the blood off his skin. you like it, he looked fierce. Once you made it outside to the center of the compound, the men had gathered. You glanced at Uki who smirked and nodded at you clearly knowing what had gone down and that Ray would now be a permanent face around here.
“What’s going on?”
“Consider this your welcome present. A token of my undying love.”
The men parted to reveal someone kneeling in the center with a burlap bag over their head. Ray looked at you with confusion.
“Open your present, my king.”
Ray approached the body then yanked off the burlap and came face to face with Donnie. When Donnie looked up at him the terror in his eyes faded.
“Ray—Ray help me. What the fuck is going on?”
Ray looked back at you, and you smiled wider nodding at him. You approached and stood beside him.
“Who’s this?”
“The Viper.”
Donnie’s eyes widened. You loved when your family’s reputation preceded you.
“Fuck, wha—wha—.”
“Shh. I’m not going to hurt you.”
“You’re not?”
“No. I have no quarrel with you. It’s him you have to worry about.”
Donnie looked at Ray again. You leaned forward to Donnie’s ear.
“He knows what you did. He knows everything you did,” you whispered.
Donnie now looked horrified. You smiled when you stood upright again then laughed.
“Ray look man don’t listen to her. She’s lying. I didn’t have anything to do with any of that. Shit just went south. I don’t know how Nick knew about the heist. I don’t know how the money went missing.”
“How did you know the money went missing if everyone who knew that is dead?”
Donnie stuttered at Ray’s question. He’d given himself away.
“Fuck. I’m sorry man. I just--.”
“Shhh,” you repeated. “What was it that you like to say—oh right. You’re in complete control of your environment?”
He looked like he was ready to piss himself. You smirked deviously. “Guess what. You’re in my environment. You always have been in my environment. My den sees and hears everything.”
Ray stared at Donnie with so much anger that you wondered how he’d handle this. Donnie was the reason his brothers were dead. He looked at you.
“Whatever you want,” you said.
Ray nodded then kissed you sloppily making you moan. He then pressed his forehead to yours.
“Gun.”
You repeated the order and took the gun that was given to you to hand to Ray. Donnie then began pleading using every slick word he could find to plead with Ray not to do it.
“I’ll get you the money back.”
“How can you give something you don’t have? I took the money back already.”
Donnie dropped to the ground realizing he had nothing left.
“You got my brothers killed. Do you know what happens to those dropped in a viper’s den?”
“Ray man please.”
“They get bit!”
You watched as Ray released bullet after bullet into Donnie. He didn’t stop until the bullets stopped and the gun clicked over and over and over, and Donnie lay dead on the ground. He dropped his head back and stared into the night sky.
“It’s done. Rest up brothers,” Ray said into the night.
You looked up and saw Razu standing across the way. his eyes wide and jaw clenched tight. You smiled then wrapped yourself around Ray who wrapped his arm possessively around you.
“Thank you.”
“Don’t mention it.”
“I mean it Aria. You’ve done so much. Thank you.”
You touched his cheek and then kissed him. “I told you. I got you. ‘Till the end Imma ride wit’ you.”
Ray pressed his lips to your forehead then the two of you turned to go back inside.
“Aria! I challenge you and that white abomination!”
You smirked and took the gun Uki handed to you, ever prepared for the shit that could rise. You turned, took aim, and shot quicker than he could realize what had happened. Your shot rang true sending the bullet dead center in Razu’s head.
“Spies and traitors don’t have the right to challenge. Uki will show you all the man Razu was.
She pressed a button on her wrist and the screens around played Razu’s dirty dealings within the den. Everyone whispered words of admonishment as they spat at and on Razu’s dead body.
“Let it be known that as of today I am his, and he is mine. If anyone objects speak now.”
Not a soul spoke and from the corner of your eye, you saw your father standing high above it all watching the events unfold. You held his gaze for a few moments and caught the smile on his lips. He nodded then pressed a kiss to his fingertips and sent it your way. His approval. It was 12 years later but better late than never.
Once you’d returned to your bedroom and ravaged each other thoroughly, you both laid there staring at each other both afraid to sleep for fear it was all a dream. Ray reached out and caressed your cheek.
“I promise to be loyal to you, to love you, and always come back for you.”
You smiled. “I promise to be loyal to you, love you and always come back for you.”
He rolled onto you and captured your lips.
“This is forever, Aria.”
“Forever.”
~End~
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
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petertingle-yipyip · 1 month
Text
WORLD CLASS SINNER - FRANK CASTLE
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six - i feel like a god
five // seven // masterlist // bear with me guys, we’re almost done //
Pairing: frank x reader (exodus) , billy x reader
Word Count: 7,228
Summary: One attack after another, Exodus finds herself wearing down. What seems like an entire shift of world hits, how can she and Frank handle the potential disaster?
Frank pulled up just as you were leaving the building. Your brain was still hazy from your interactions with Matt. You wanted to curse him for still having such an effect on you, but it was your own heart betraying you.
You cursed that instead.
As you landed in the passenger seat, Frank shoved your vest into your lap. He gave you a quick rundown as he drove while you changed.
Amy had left in hopes of getting help from her friend, but that friend was more concerned with the five million dollar payout.
When you pulled up to the new building, you hesitated. If you went in without your mask but your vest, someone could figure you out. Hell, someone probably would. If you went in without protection, you’d probably die. As if sensing your dilemma, Frank popped the trunk.
Looking in, you saw your duffel. You thanked him quickly and found the mask. You fit it into place quickly and Frank put a rifle in your hands. Wordlessly, you followed him inside and a small smile crept across your lips at the familiarity of it all.
The only thing lacking was comms. If you and Frank got separated, you’d be one your own. So you decided you wouldn’t get separated.
Frank fired the first shots after insisting he go in first. His reasoning was that he had his bulletproof vest on so he was safer than you, but you could feel the undertone of his words. He wanted to keep you safe, yes, but he wanted to be the one to get to Amy.
When Frank paused to shoot through the bottom of the next flight of stairs, you took the chance to get around him. You jumped over the fallen bodies and began a sprint up the stairs. You discarded the rifle when it began to annoy you and drew the knife instead.
“You come up here and she’s dead!” The man yelled.
You froze for a second, shifting the knife in your tight grip. You spared a glance to Frank and he nodded. You dropped to a crouch and began carefully moving closer.
Frank yelled a response, though you weren’t fully
listening. You were stuck in a tunnel-like focus, one foot in front of the other to get to Amy.
Once you reached the floor, you saw the man blocking Amy. You sucked in a breath and pulled your arm back. You sent the knife flying and it buried into the back of the man’s knee. He fell with a loud scream and you pushed into a run.
Amy was able to disarm him and pointed his own gun back at him. You drew yours as you got closer and Amy pulled the trigger. Your feet faltered for less than a second and she looked to you in a panic.
You put your hands up in surrender as you got closer and she lowered the gun. You held your arms out to her and she fell against your chest. Her arms wrapped around your waist in a tight embrace and you held her close. You rocked her gently and spun slightly so you could see Frank coming down the hall.
You signaled with your eyes to the man on the ground and you watched the determination set in his shoulders. You pried Amy’s arms apart and gently took the gun from her hands. You ushered her down the hallway with instructions to get her stuff and come back to you. She was muttering that she had killed him and it brought you back to that night you killed Wesley, when Karen believed it was her.
“You only shot him.” You said gently as you walked by her side for a few steps. “You didn’t kill him, I promise you. We’ll take care of it but you need to get your stuff so we can leave. Okay, kiddo?”
She nodded wordlessly and disappeared toward whatever apartment her stuff was hidden in.
“She okay?” Frank asked with his foot on the man’s chest. You glanced down and watched the bullet wound bubble with new blood.
“She’s alive, that’s enough for now.” You knelt down and yanked your knife, causing a scream of pain and a spurt of blood to cover your hand. “Just a little shaken up. First time you shoot someone can do that, I guess.” You shrugged. “I’ll talk to her later.”
You flipped your blade over your hand and shoved it into the side of the man’s neck. His scream was a gurgled sound as the warm fluid coated your hand again. You held it there, twisted for good measure, then freed the blade. You put it away, feeling the dripping fluid stain your clothes, and exchanged it for your gun.
You grabbed Frank’s arm and pulled him to follow Amy.
She stormed into her friend’s apartment and you felt a small swell of pride. When her friend tried to talk to her, you put your clean hand at the back of her neck and pushed her head down while you led her away from Amy. The friend tried to apologize but Amy ignored her, only giving her attention to kick her. You chuckled slightly and let go just in time for her to fall to the ground.
Together, the three of you left unharmed.
You received two messages on the drive. One was from Dinah, to your actual phone number. The second was from an old contact from your mercenary days. You didn’t remember the man’s name, just knew there were only a few people in New York for that but you completely cut ties with most when you started Columbia. You only maintained the other for information or just in case it didn’t work out.
dinah madani - dumont called me over. she might know something. come with me?
The message from your contact was an address and a time. You vaguely knew the location. It was a bar or a club, and it was asking you to go later on that night. It was a risk, considering it probably had something to do with that five million dollars in your head. You decided you’d go alone instead of with Dinah, after a quick trip to your apartment to change and arm yourself.
“I don’t know you guys do it.” Amy finally spoke as you were all walking towards the trailer. “I literally just shot somebody and the way that I feel right now, I don’t think I’ll ever do it again. I- I mean, I just keep seeing how scared he was, you know? Like…”
“He wasn’t scared of you or the gun you pointed at him.” You explained calmly. “He was scared that Frank and I were coming. He knew how it would end.”
“He got what he needed.” Frank added and you elbowed him in the ribs.
“Listen.” You stepped around to stand in front of her. Her eyes dropped, unable to meet yours. You gently lifted her chin till she gave in and looked at you. “I know you hated to have to pull that trigger, but you did it. It kept you alive.”
“Is that all there is now?” She moved your hand off her face. “Alive or dead? Them or us?”
“Yeah.” Frank answered quietly.
“For now.” You nodded sadly.
“I’m gonna do whatever I can to make that different for you.” He promised her. “I gotta deal with Bill and I’m gonna finish those Schultzes.”
“You’re gonna be able to go and do whatever it is you wanna do.” You added your own promise, carefully putting a hand on her shoulder. You waited a second for her to push you away but she didn’t. “If I can get out and go to law school, you can do whatever you want.”
“What if Billy kills you?” Amy asked Frank and you could see tears in her eyes.
“Nah.” Frank sighed. “I’m not the one that dies, kid. I’m the one that does the killing.”
“What about you?” Her voice cracked as she turned to you.
“He won’t.” You shook your head, fighting the burn of unshed tears building in your eyes. Something about that panicked, desperate look she gave you made all your strength melt away and you were that scared little girl on her way back to the Red Room, begging your ‘Aunt Melina’ to save you. “Everytime we try to be someone different, that’s when the wrong people get hurt. I nearly lost the first person I loved because I tried to be someone else… I’m not letting you get hurt.”
She nodded quickly and took a deep, wavering breath. You grabbed the sleeve of her jacket and pulled her into a hug. Her arms came around you quickly and grabbed Frank with the other hand. He followed your demand easily enough and put one arm around your shoulders and the other around Amy. The girl seemed to burrow deeper into the embrace and you felt some of the fear and uncertainty leave her.
After a few moments, you stepped away. She smiled in thanks before you motioned her inside. She mumbled something that made Frank laugh and you gave a small smile, glad to hear that he still knew how.
You lingered in the walkway for a moment. You knew you could pick the lock for the trunk if you needed, but asking for the keys would be easier. As if sensing your deliberation, Frank faced you.
“What’s with you, huh?” He vaguely pointed towards you. “You got that look.”
“I need my gear.” You admitted.
“Something I should know?”
“Not yet.”
He offered a pointed look but pressed the button to pop the trunk.
“I have an old contact, haven’t spoken in years, but five million is enough to try anything I guess.” You shrugged. “It’s probably nothing, but if he’s desperate enough to reach out-“
“Maybe you can get the jump on the guy.” He nodded. “You sure it’s smart to go alone?”
“No.” You laughed slightly. “But I won’t drag Matt into this and I need you alive to protect her.” You gestured to the trailer. “At least if I die doing this, I can take the bastard with me and you can get rid of Billy.”
“What happened with him at Red’s place?” He asked, motioning for you to walk and he’d follow.
“He wanted the truth about what happened. I gave it to him but he didn’t believe it.” You said honestly. “Also reminded him I was Exodus.”
Frank snorted a laugh. “So much for secret identity.”
“He’ll die soon anyway. Besides, not like anyone’ll believe the fully cocked rants of an escaped psych patient.”
“Ain’t the expression half-cocked?” Frank raised a brow.
You cracked a small smile. “Sorry, a friend of mine always said it wrong. He said ‘no one asks for half a cock.’ But yeah, I’m not really worried about him telling anyone.”
“Don’t tell me you trust him still, Y/N.” He groaned.
“I don’t.” You promised as you grabbed your bag. “But he’s a lower priority… What’s your plan for tonight?”
“Stake out Bill’s Valhalla bullshit, find a way in.” He shrugged.
“Alone?” Your brows raised.
“I was gonna ask you but I didn’t know you had plans.” He joked with a small shrug. “Don’t worry about me, alright? I’ll call Curtis.”
“I may have my own way.” You said with a tilt of your head.
“Yeah? What’s that?”
“A platinum wig and a tight little skirt.” You shrugged.
“Shit, Y/N/N.” He sighed. “You serious? You can fight in a skirt like that?” He laughed and you glared at him.
“I don’t need pants to put a bullet in his head or a knife in his chest.” You said sharply.
“Alright.” He still laughed but put his hands up in surrender. “Before you start showin’ off those legs, let me see what I can find. Good?”
“Yeah, alright. Be careful.”
“You too.”
By the time you had gotten back to your apartment and changed, it had begun raining. You changed into your suit with a fully loaded belt and threw an old zip-up on. You tugged the hood up as you climbed to your fire escape, slipping your mask over your eyes.
You made your way through the wet alleyways, stepping over soggy trash bags and puddles on your way to the club. You refused to go in blind so your mask was alive the whole way. The tech was constantly scanning and working to alert you of every change. By the time you reached the club, you could see two dead bodies and a brawl still in progress.
Once you got under the awning, you discarded the soaked jacket and it landed with a wet thump on the sidewalk. You slipped a blade into your hand and took a deep breath, slamming down the mental walls that blocked out the world, before you stepped inside.
As the door shut behind you, you watched a man have his stomach sliced open. For a moment, you and the man from Ohio locked eyes. His brows furrowed with confusion but you gave no reaction, other than a smirk. You broke eye contact for a second to scan the room but your contact was nowhere to be seen, not even one of the fallen bodies.
However, that second was enough.
The man slammed into you quickly and tackled you to the floor. You landed hard, air knocked out and your head collided with the ground. You were thankful for the slight padding under the cheap carpeting when your head bounced with a thud rather than a smack but the gratitude quickly faded when you realized your hands were empty.
The impact had caused you to drop your blade.
His hands were around your throat almost immediately and you clawed at his wrists and forearms for a second. You tried to throw him off but he leaned more of his weight into you and you coughed, feeling the suffocation grow worse. Your eyes darted in a panic, landing on a growing red stain on his side. You quickly woke a Bite and pressed your fist against him. He looked down at the contact, not releasing his grip, and you fired the weapon.
Once, twice, three times.
He fell off in a convulsing heap, jerking and kicking while you crawled away. You collected your knife and rubbed gently at the raw skin of your throat before focusing back on the fight. You used one of the tables to haul yourself up and one of the other men took over the fight.
You blew a short breath of relief and then forced the burning pain away. You pulled back your arm, adjusting your sightline as the fight moved, and flung the blade as soon as you had a line. The man saw it coming and managed to pull his opponent in front of him for a shield so your blade buried into someone else’s chest.
A growl rumbled your throat and you ran forward. He pushed the human shield toward you but turned into another man’s grip. You caught the stumbling body and gripped the blade, pulling it down and out so it tore through the cartilage of the man’s chest. He sputtered and coughed blood, spitting the warm liquid across your chest and neck. Your hand came away coated the same way and you let the body fall in a crumpled mess at your feet. You nudged the bloody mess away with your foot and found your original target.
You pulled back and flung the same knife, watching it bury into the Ohio Man’s shoulder blade. You moved in immediately following the blade and grabbed him by his collar. You prepped another blade in your hand and spun him to face you. You pressed the blade to the underside of his chin but he grabbed your weapon by the blade.
He gripped tighter and you saw his palm begin to bleed. You withdrew your weapon quickly and he hissed as a sharp line cut through his palm. You stepped back to slam a foot against his chest and you heard the crack of his sternum on contact. He fell back against the table behind him, clutching his chest and gasping for breath.
The last of the other men that fought against him got to his feet. Out of the corner of your eye, you saw him looking between you and the Ohio Man as if trying to figure out who the greater threat would be. Before he could make a decision, you made it for him.
In a swift motion, your Bite was raised and you let a hefty charge go. It landed right on its mark, the center of his forehead, and he rigidly fell to the ground. As he tensed, his trigger finger went off and you ducked slightly, throwing arms up to protect your head and the blade fell. 
Your only opposition now was the Ohio Man.
You climbed into the table and let your knee sit on the loose bone at the center of his chest. One of his hands came under your leg and tried to force you off. The other foot went flat against the table to steady yourself. You took a fistful of his shirt and slammed your other hand down.
Once, twice, three times. You could feel the split of your knuckles under your gloves and your hands were dripping with blood that wasn’t yours. You saw the split of skin at his cheek and the steady stream flowing out his nose. You reached behind you for your last blade and lifted it high, plotting a quick course for his eye socket.
As your blade was crashing down, he ducked his head and the tip landed deep within the table. You looked back at him with a fire in your eyes just as his free hand landed against your stomach.
The hit caused your knee to slip and instead of pinning him, you were straddling him. You tried to adjust your position but his hands gripped your belt and he was pushing off the table. He tackled you into a table on the other side of the room and your spine hit hard into the edge.
He let you fall to the floor and you rolled in mild pain. As you were getting to your feet, he kicked at your ribs and you collapsed.
One. Two. Three. Four. Five kicks before he stepped away.
Your rib was burning, back aching. Your hand was sticky with the other man’s blood and your throat still burned. You were in pain, but not enough to stop you. Your mind raced as you got to your hands and knees again, using your peripherals to watch for him. You inventoried your weapons and understood your knives were scattered. Other than your Bites, you had your gun and a few shock disks. You tilted your head to yourself in resignation.
It would have to do.
You righted yourself and looked around, finding the Ohio Man sliding something into his fingers.
“You said-“ He panted heavy, a slight sway in his stance. You quirked a brow at the realization that he was more worn out than you were but said nothing. “-you didn’t… Have religion.”
You said nothing, only gave a sharp nod, one quick dip of your chin that someone may have missed if they weren’t paying attention.
“But I see it.” He insisted. “The Devil is in your eyes.”
“Может быть, я дьявол.” You taunted. (Maybe I am the Devil.)
He came at you and threw a sloppy punch. Something hard hit the edge of your mask with a crack and you felt the scar break open. You managed to duck the next swing and spun, kicking out one of his knees. He turned towards you after he fell and threw the entirety of his weight into a hit to the side of your knee. To your surprise, your kneecap stayed in place but you buckled regardless.
You leaned a palm to the ground and kicked out, your heel hitting his mouth and you could’ve sworn you saw a piece of a tooth fly. You hurried forward and leaned into both hands to stabilize you as you spun your legs to hook around his neck. You threw your hips hard to the side and you both went tumbling.
You had enough force in the movement that he continued rolling once you had stopped. He was on his face, pushing up when you moved again. You ran the few feet before you slid on one knee, driving the other forward to slam into the side of his head. You flattened that foot and kicked off to spin yourself the other way. You grabbed a fistful of his hair and pulled your gun, pushing the barrel into his mouth.
He grabbed at your wrist and began pushing your hand away. When your finger released your safety, he jolted forward and slammed you to your back. He forced your elbow to bend and he aimed your gun back at you. You let your eyes go wide for a second and he offered a solemn expression, false sympathy.
You sneered slightly and angled the gun towards one of the plates of your top. You offered a silent plea that they would hold. You had seen Matt get shot in the head at about the same range and live so you should be fine. The materials were the same, or close enough at least.
Right?
You closed your eyes and waited for the gunshot. It went off like an explosion in your ear as the battering ram of force hit your chest. A gunshot had never felt that way, never as loud or as painful. You didn’t know or really care what the reason was but your protection held and you thanked Matt’s God for that. You coughed raggedly and your lungs spasmed as one tried to regulate with the other. You didn’t think it would feel so rough but you figured the close range did you no favors. The Ohio Man’s head cocked when he didn’t see blood so he fired again and the pain started all over again.
He dropped the gun and pressed his fingers to one of the protective pieces. He frowned slightly and looked down at his hands. You looked too and saw the brass knuckles. He met your eyes for a second before lifting his fist. You reacted first and fired your Bite. He groaned loudly but fought through the shock.
So you fired again.
And again. And once more for good measure.
He fell to the side and you pushed him the rest of the way off. You hurried to recollect your weaponry, checking it off in your head as you did. Your gun. The knife from the table. Two bloodied knives, one beside the table and one a few feet away. You checked over your shoulder and the Ohio Man was just getting his bearings as your contact came back into the room.
“Это была настройка!” You sneered, making your way across the room. “Я должен убить тебя там, где ты стоишь.” (This was a setup! I ought to kill you where you stand.)
He tried to explain it away but his words were cut short when a bullet went through his neck. You turned quickly and saw the Ohio Man pulling his arm back. He threw the empty gun at you and your arms went up instinctively.
He hadn’t thrown it hard so it bounced off your arms and fell to the ground with a sad clatter. You looked back and saw he was gone. You cursed yourself and the room before heading out the way you came in.
Your adrenaline died out by the time you got home. You almost fell through your apartment window. You ditched your mask, belt, and protective top, threw them to your couch. You kicked your boots down the hall and peeled your suit off when you got into the bathroom. You had to let your hands sit under the tap before the blood encrusted materials would be separated from your skin so you left those in a wet heap in the sink.
You dragged your gaze to the mirror and stared at the new damage. The reopened scar on your cheekbone, just the edge was fresh. You could live with that healing itself. Red patches were appearing at your throat, purple and blue undertones threatening. Your chest, just to the right of your sternum, was a deep purple. It spread out down towards your stomach and seeped to the left side as well and hooked around your rib cage to disappear under your arm. The deepest spots were two circular blotches, seemingly stacked on top of one another. They were what was supposed to be bullet holes.
“Maybe there is a God.” You muttered to yourself.
You turned in the mirror and saw that cursed break in your ribs. It was a deeper shade of purple, dark blue veins cutting through it like a lightning strike. There was a small lump at the center and when you pressed it, you winced and discovered it was relatively dense. You frowned slightly. It couldn’t have been the rib itself, that would’ve hurt so much more. You chalked it up as just swelling and hoped it would dissipate overnight.
You ran a hand over your tired eyes and dragged it down your face. One last glance in the mirror showed you how tired you were. Darkening circles under your eyes, the light seemingly extinguished. You pursed your lips slightly and wondered if you could get back to who you were.
You took a quick yet careful shower and changed into something comfortable. You were about to climb into bed when you saw a small book on top of your covers. You carefully lifted it, a paperback copy of The Outsiders. You had read the book in college and loved it, but hadn’t talked much about it since.
You flipped the pages and saw a hastily scribbled message. Foggy’s handwriting but Matt’s words.
‘stay gold y/n/n. youll be back with us soon :) love matt and fogster’
About an inch below it, delicate handwriting added on.
‘and karen! <3’
You smiled slightly and gently placed the book on your nightstand.
Maybe they were your way back.
The next night, with your platinum wig and tight skirt, you headed to Valhalla. All the girls were picked up from the same place and you blended in seamlessly. Excited giggles and swaying hips served as you cover as you arrived at the scene. You were given a few uncertain looks but a flirty bat of your lashes and a small hike of your skirt had them on your side.
“And who are you?” One of the men asked, shamelessly dragging his eyes across your body. Following the curve of your waist and shape of your breasts then hips.
“Alexa Nazyalensky.” You answered with a smile and a hint of your accent, flicking the short white bangs out of your vision. “For tonight, at least.”
“For tonight?” He repeated skeptically.
You shrugged innocently and dropped the accent. “Or I can be Isabelle Brekker. Cecily Riors. Whoever you want me to be.”
He grinned and reached a hand for your hip. You let him pull you in but you put a hand up when he leaned in to kiss you. He looked at you in shock before laughing, squeezing your waist in promise, then walked away. You waited till he looked away to roll your eyes.
It was easy for you to slip away. An untouched drink in your hand as you stumbled to the nearest wall, pretending to use it as support as you moved down to the hallway. You didn’t have a full layout of the place so you were focusing on your abilities, opening yourself and hooking on to Frank like you were drowning and he was the lifeline to get you out.
You two met in a dimly lit room and you tossed the wig aside the first chance you had. Your only indications were the exchange of the sharp two note whistle. You walked with a hand out and he grabbed your wrist. He pulled you in and shoved something into your hand. Your hands wandered the object and realized it was a belt and thigh holster.
You smiled and gave quiet thanks while you clipped into place. A gun sat at your hip and a knife at your thigh. You felt Frank pressing gently on your stomach, likely searching for your bulletproof.
“I’ll be okay.” You answered quietly.
“Don’t die.” He said instead.
As the words left him, a bright light flashed in the room and rock music blasted through unseen speakers. You drew the knife on instinct and threw the other arm up to block the lights. Frank grabbed your arm and put you behind him. You turned so your back hit his and you could watch one end of the room while he watched the other.
Another flash, another barrage of sounds. Frank shot into the darkness and began to move in a circle. He pushed into you so your feet crossed over each other as you moved with him.
You felt your anger growing in the pit of your stomach. It was an ambush. You recognized that too late. You gripped the knife tighter, no doubt turning your knuckles white. But what Billy didn’t know was that you could fight without your eyes.
You let yourself fall into your abilities, feeling out the room. Your own anger began simmering hotter under your skin and you wished you would get a chance to utilize your hot touch and claw Billy’s eyes out. You could feel someone on the other side of the room, the side Frank was facing.
Anticipation was buzzing through the entire facility that it was hard to pinpoint. There were some spots it seemed to collect and that was where you assumed the people were. You just needed them to move a bit closer.
Another flash, but instead of aggressive music, you heard gunshots.
Frank fell into you and you quickly moved to catch him. He got back to his feet almost immediately, pushing you down in the process. You knew better than to argue so you stayed low, knife ready and willing to slice someone open.
Frank fired back and you wondered for a second if your gun would’ve been better. Before you could switch then, you felt something hit your shoulder as the lights shone again. The small projectile slammed into the meat of your shoulder with enough force to throw you backwards. You stumbled in your crouch and ultimately fell to your side.
A puff of smoke erupted from the contact and you looked down to see no blood. They were using non-lethals, which meant Billy wanted you both alive, which meant it was personal for Billy. You weren’t exactly sure if it was good for you two or not.
Frank was beside you the next time the lights went out and he helped you to kneel low. You tried to lift your arm but felt only tingles shoot through the limb. The shot was well-aimed, hitting a pressure point that left the arm useless for a few minutes.
Lights on again, another shot at Frank’s back.
You regretted coming at that point. You were only serving to distract Frank and if Billy got him because of it, you’d never forgive yourself.
The lights came quicker this time and you saw a dark clothes figure coming towards you two, blade drawn. You slammed your numb shoulder into Frank’s chest to knock him down and swiped your own blade first, cutting a long line up the side of the assailant’s leg. You heard him fall but the darkness came before you could get to him. You didn’t miss the dragging sound of someone pulling away. 
Lights came, another blade from behind. It cut across your shoulder and you yelped.
Angrily, you pushed to your feet and Frank got up beside you.
The lights were coming every other second now and someone slashed a blade at you two everytime. There was no discernible pattern to their attacks so you had to only react. They were going more heavily after Frank and you weren’t sure if that was their plan or if the man was simply putting himself in front of you.
You decided to test the idea when the light shone again. You were blinded so you had to trust your powers. When you were able to catch the man, you flung the knife over Frank’s shoulder and it buried itself in the assailant’s lung. You admired the aim for a second when a blade cut across your back. You held in your exclamation this time.
“You think I wouldn’t know you were coming?” Billy’s voice echoed.
Another assault, another cut. This time your upper thigh.
“I can get him.” You whispered to Frank.
“You do not move.” He said tightly. “I’m not gonna let hi-“
A knife across the front of your chest, the back of Frank’s leg.
“Not gonna let him take you from me.” He finished.
“He’ll take you if this keeps up.” You argued quietly.
Frank began yelling back and you took cautious steps away. When the lights came on again, you were face to face with one of Billy’s masked men.
You reacted instantly.
You grabbed the man’s shirt front and yanked him to the ground. You balled your hand in his shirt and threw angry, burning punches. Your hand hurt as it collided with the plastic, but every hard hit started to break it. With a decisive blow, your fist smashed through the plastic and its jagged edges carved your knuckles. The man’s face was a bloodied mess by the time the light came on again. Scraps of the mask were embedded in his skin and he was limp underneath your weight.
A hard object hit one of the bruises on your chest and you cried out. You collapsed to the side and then the object hit again, this time against your shoulder. You threw your arms up to cover your head and could see Frank receiving the same assault. You took a few quick breaths, steadied your pounding heart, and did what you did best.
You fought back.
You kicked out the closest leg and the man fell on top of you. You shoved him off as you turned and you pulled your gun. You fired once and it hit the man’s knee. He clutched the bloody joint and another pair of hands landed on your wrist. You leaned and lifted one leg, hooking it around his neck.
You threw your hips hard to flip the man to his back. You landed behind him so you shifted down and looped an arm around his neck, locking your grip with your other hand. He fumbled for something to break the hold but you shoved the heel of your foot against his hands hard enough that you heard a crunch.
The man went limp and you shoved the body aside. Whether he was dead or unconscious wasn’t your problem. As you got to your feet, a pair of arms locked around your chest from behind and pinned your arms to your side. Without a knife or a gun, you were stuck. You glanced around, a small panic beginning to pulse in your chest, and saw Frank receiving his own beat down. Tears began to brim when you realized you couldn’t help him. A beat down he was taking so you didn’t have to.
Your face was pulled in another direction and Billy stared back at you.
“Stop this.” You said simply. It was intended to be angry, a warning, but it came out scared and pathetic. Exactly how Billy wanted you. “Stop this!”
“Why should I?” He sneered. “You know what he did to me.”
“I did it too.” You argued. It was a desperate plea, as if to convince him to put you in Frank’s place, but he didn’t budge. Instead, he slammed a fist against your cheek and it knocked your head to the side, splitting the skin.
“I know.”
You were shoved to your knees as the men began to beat on Frank while he was down. One man held an arm and another held the other, both keeping a hand firmly planted on your shoulder. You jerked and screamed, promising you'd kill Billy for what he’d done that night, but you understood that you weren’t getting out of it anytime soon. Your hard movements threatened to dislocate your shoulders so you collapsed, tears falling down your cheeks.
Billy smiled at you and you felt a new wave of anger coursing through you. The men holding you made sounds of discomfort and their grips shifted.
“Break him.” Billy commanded and you glared in his direction. “Break him and then finish him.”
“What about her?” A man holding you spoke, trying to hide the burn of his hands.
“Let her watch.”
“Вы все умрете за это.” You said lowly and let your head hang. “Я убью каждого из вас. Медленно. Болезненно.” (You’ll all die for this. I’ll kill each and every one of you. Slowly. Painfully.)
Once Billy was out of the room, Frank acted first. He kicked out the foot of the closest man and you smiled as he slammed his face into the floor. You grabbed both of the men’s sleeves and kicked yourself to slide backwards. The action pulled both men to the floor and freed your arms.
You quickly got to your feet and found one of the discarded weapons. A length of lead pipe. You picked it up and spun it in your hands, getting a feel for the weight quickly before a man came charging in. You sidestepped at the last second and bashed the pipe into his spine. You slammed it against him again and again, his body jerking from the impact.
Once you were satisfied with the bloodied scene, you turned to see a man staring at you in fear. He tried to shake it before he ran at you and you kicked out at his chest. When he fell, you pressed the pipe to the base of his throat and continued to put pressure till it broke skin.
The familiar whistle took your attention for a second and Frank tossed you a small blade. You caught it easily and pulled the pipe away, replacing it with the short knife. A spurt of blood splattered across your outfit when you pulled the knife free.
You were tackled to the ground and were glad for it. Gunshots sounded once your bodies hit and you coughed as the air left your lungs for a moment. He tried to pin your hands but one hand feigned positioning the knife while the other clawed at his face. He couldn’t catch both hands so when he grabbed the wrist of your empty one, you jabbed the knife into his abdomen and his grip fell away. You added the other to the knife and ripped it through his stomach, blood spilling onto you as the dead man fell to the side.
You got to your knees and looked around, seeing only dead bodies. You sniffled and rubbed the heel of your hand across your cheek, smearing your blood around. Frank limped over to you and helped you up. You frowned slightly but accepted his help.
You took one more look and saw the furthest man climbing to his feet. You stepped around Frank and threw the knife. It spun over itself till the blade buried into the man’s forehead. You picked up one of the discarded rifles, checked the clip, and followed Frank to the next room.
Immediate gunfire when you entered the room. Frank kept you behind him but you managed to get your shots off, whether it be over his shoulder or from around his side. You ducked behind a metal crate and saw someone laying on their back, blood bubbling from various wounds. You snatched the knife from their belt and dragged it across their throat.
You peaked over the crate and saw Billy ducking behind one of his men. You cocked your head and saw a chance, when he turned his back. You threw the knife and it traveled quickly to dig into the back of his leg. You smiled slightly until a bullet skimmed the top of your shoulder.
You dropped again and thanked the man for having shitty aim. You rolled the joint and felt the blood sliding down your arm but ignored it. You found the rifle again and fired a few quick shots while Frank blew out the glass of the upstairs office.
Together you two ran up the stairs after Billy but the sight made you both pause.
The other women that had been at the party, their bodies were strewn across the office. They were all riddled with bullet holes across their abdomens, shirts soaked in their own blood. The rifle fell from your hand and you felt your heart drop to your feet.
Frank stumbled through the room but you couldn’t
move.
It wasn’t right. They shouldn’t be dead. If they had just gotten shot, they should still be alive, struggling to breathe and fighting to live. Right?
You had to move. You swallowed everything you were feeling, shoved it so far down you didn’t have to acknowledge it, and forced your feet to move. You tore your eyes away from the women and went to Frank.
“Frank.” You tried and reached for his arm. He shoved you off. “Frank, we need to go now!”
You could hear the sirens, see the flashing police lights.
“Get away from me, Y/N/N.” He muttered.
“I’m not-“ You tried but he pointed his rifle at you. “What are you doing?” Your voice dropped.
“Get out of here.”
“No.” You dared another step but he jerked the gun at you, freezing you in place. “What are you gonna do, shoot me? Go ahead.”
“Look at this. I did this!”
“I don’t believe it.” You shook your head. “But if you really wanna do it, fine. I don’t care. I’d rather you kill me than Billy.”
Frank muttered something to himself and shook his head, but the rifle aimed at your chest didn’t falter.
You swallowed hard and tried again. “The cops are outside and they’re gonna-“
“Drop the gun!” One of the officers yelled, bright lights shining into the room.
You squinted into the beam and your hands went up in surrender. You wondered what they thought, two people covered in blood but only one had a weapon, the other an empty holster. You knew they’d assume Frank was going to kill you. Hell, that was probably what Frank wanted them to think. But you knew. You knew he’d never be able to do that. Even if you pushed and dared and threatened, he’d never pull the trigger on you.
But you had to admit… The scene was rather convincing.
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vermillionsails · 4 months
Text
THE WANDERER part 1
Cooper Howard/ The Ghoul x Reader
synopsis: The reader aka Bullseye gets run out of her family settlement to find an old friend. what will happen when they finally see each other after 6 years?
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WARNINGS ⚠️: Cooper Howard/ The ghoul x female reader afab reader, DNI IF YOU ARE UNDER 18 GO ON GIT. eventual smut, adult language, fallout show, and game cannon violence. age gap reader is 22 if you're not, pretend.
I try to keep the description of the reader neutral only things that are talked about are the reader's age, teeth, smaller hands, and eventually intimate parts. I do not own the rights to Lucy or Cooper Howard or the fallout setting. the plot and town characters are the only things I made up. Time skips are in this at least this first part anyway. dream sequence as well it will be in bold so you can tell and see the difference.
A/N: I've only seen the first episode and clips, and interviews of the characters cause Freevee only has the first episode but, the brain worms are still activated for this man! 😩
Update A/N ive managed to see the rest of the show. i also wanna give thanks to my bff @oppositeoflove-isindifference for helping me edit this brain rot and make it make sense. i love you bitch, i aint never gonna stop loveing you bitch!
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I know it's not from the actual Fallout soundtrack but this song fits Cooper's vibe. A couple of 'I don't know how but they found me' songs do honestly but enjoy!!
The only thing you can do is hope. you've been hoping for two days now. All you have now is your pack, everything you've scavenged in the past two days, and Shroud. Your grandma said, before the bombs dropped, Shroud would’ve been called a rottweiler. To you though, he was your best friend. You were lucky to find armor for him, so you didn’t have to worry so much about him tagging along. You were thankful for it honestly, you wouldn't doubt that Reggie would shoot him.  So here you are in the wastes, with Shroud lying across your lap. You had set up camp against an old rusted-out van. You move Shroud, deciding to sleep in the van hidden away, instead of outside in the open. You put out the campfire and unroll the bed roll from your pack and lay down. Shroud splayed out next to you as your eyes start to drift closed. It couldn't have been more than a couple of hours before Shroud was lying on top of you, trying to nudge you awake, as gunfire and a creature roared outside. Grabbing the handle on his armor, you tapped his nose with your finger to signal to play dead. You listen as the gunfire continues. The sound of shouting rises above the gunfire. You could make out at least two voices, plus the creature. It lasts for about another 20 minutes before the noise dies down, and voices come down to a normal level. You can hear two people arguing as footsteps get closer to the van. Very slowly, you reach for the pistol strapped to your leathers. As your hand reaches the handle, you hear a gun cock and a man whistle. 
“Figured you were following us. Smart hiding.” You look up to the voice’s owner, standing in front of the van door with him pistol aimed at Shroud's back. You recognize the voice, his drawl and cowboy hat knocking the memory of Mr. Howard forward.  “Mr. Howard, it's me, Bullseye!” you shout, holding both your hands up in surrender. You silently pray that Shroud doesn't leap or make any sudden movements.  He cocks his head as he looks at you, lowering his gun somewhat.  “Bullseye, huh? That really you?”  You swallow and nod, replying, “Yes sir, it's me. Grandma sent me out to look for you. We’re in big trouble.”  He tuts, putting his gun away, seemingly disappointed he didn't get to shoot anything.  “Considering you're the only person who calls me ‘Mr. Howard’, I suppose that is you, Bullseye,” he chuckled.  He waits for a beat and scowls. He growls, “Well come on now, girly! We got some catching up to do, and I ain't got all night.” You give Shroud two pats, he gets off of you and sits at the van entrance, waiting. “Yes sir Mr. Howard,” you agree, scrambling to pick up your pack and bedroll. You make your way over to Howard and…a Vaultie?  You've never seen one before. The blue and gold suit hurt your eyes, even in the moonlight. She smiles and waves,“Hi, I'm Lucy! Nice to meet you.”  Giving an awkward wave back, you nod to her. “my actual name is y/n, but everyone calls me Bullseye” She smiles genuinely at you, a rare occurrence out here in the wastes.  “That's a nice name…why do they call you Bull-” 
Cooper cuts her off, “I only needed you to help me kill that fuckin’ thing. Don't make me tie you back up.” You give her a sorry half smile and turn to Cooper. “I'll make it as fast as I can Mr. Howard,” you say, ”Ray and Reggie have built up a coup against Grandma; they've already killed 5 people, and some of our Brahmin. I escaped about two days ago, and Grandma told me to come find you. I have a package she wanted me to give you, in case you needed incentive.”  The ghoul sits down next to you, sharpening a knife, and purses his lips. “Smart woman, what did she send with you?”  You turn to unzip your pack, spotting Lucy in the corner of your eye, She seems astonished that he’s being somewhat civil to you.  You pull out the package, a small foot locker-like box. The metal dings from the objects inside rattling as you hand it to him. “Ten different chems, two large Brahmin steaks, ammo, a couple of stimpacks, and all the caps she had left,” you list, recounting everything your grandma told you. He stares down into the box, taking a long look at the top of the lid. Finally, he closes it.  “I'll do it. This is a nice incentive, y'all must be in some real bad trouble darlin’.”  The fluttering feeling when he calls you darlin’ quickly dissipates, as you feel your worry set in. You feel your chest tighten as you look down at the dirt and sand.  “Yeah, it's bad Mr. Howard. Grandma might not….might not be alive when we go back.”  He hums as he goes back to sharpening his knife. “So what are you gonna do if we go back and she isn't?”  You look at him for a moment as you think. “Kill them, have someone else be mayor, and let Doe and Jericho be the new snipers,” you reply. He strikes the knife against the sharpening stone, sending sparks off to the ground. It makes the mix of sand and dirt pop and sizzle at your feet.  “You don’t wanna be mayor?”  You can feel the sadness wrap around your chest and squeeze again. “N-no I'm not- not as skilled as grandma. She could barter for a years worth of supplies then turn around and stop a fight in two seconds.”  He chuckles, finally looking at you with a smile tugging at the right side of his lips. “Yeah, Sue was always good at calming people down,” he muses. You chuckle at his sentiment. He points at you with him knife, saying, “Now that I know the situation, think you can help me dress that deathclaw over there?” You see it splayed out in the dirt, lifeless, the horns digging into the ground. It’s at least 6ft smaller than the adults you've seen.  “Is it a bounty?” 
Cooper grunts and nods, “Yup, it's the last a group a nearby farmer wanted gone.” He grabs the bounty paper from his duster pocket and hands it to you. “Fuckin’ things kept eating everything, including his wife.” You look over the bounty. 500 caps rewarded for the head. You nod, “That's a pretty good bounty.”  Lucy clears her throat and raises her hand, the pipboy light shining directly into your eyes. “I helped, do I get some of the caps?”  Cooper raises an eyebrow ridge at her and gripes, “Put your damn arm down, your’re blinding Bullseye! And I already told you, you're getting 20 and then you’re on your own. If I see you again, it’ll be too soon and I'll shoot you.”  You keep quiet, watching them argue with each other.  “I used ten lock-joint syringes on that thing.”  Cooper laughs, “Yeah those are cheap to make, trust me I know. You're getting 20 and I won't kill you, that's it.”  You see Lucy huff and sink back down in her spot.  After a couple of minutes, the ghoul looks back at you and asks, “Can you help me dress it?” You nod and grab the knife from your boot. “Yeah, I can help.” He gets up and walks over to it, his duster flowing in the breeze like in his old movies that your grandma used to tell you about. “Atta girl let's get to it.” You get up and join him. The bottom of your boots goes from crunching the dirt to thudding and squelching from the blood-soaked dirt pooling around its body.  You adjust the green baker's cap on your head and kneel next to its torso.  “Do you want me to start at the back of the neck or the tail?” you ask. Cooper grunts ,working to saw off the head, “Start at the tail, less tension while I do this.”  Nodding, you move further down. After a few minutes of making a deep enough incision, you get the muscle and start cutting towards the head. Its skin splits into two halves as you try to keep yourself steady. It smells like dust and blood.  Part of you wonders if the deathclaws think that you humans smell as strange as you think they do. Pulled from your thoughts, you hear Cooper clear his throat. You stop and look over at him. “You tune out too easily, could get you killed.”  You feel your cheeks heat up in embarrassment and stammer, “Sorry Mr. Howard, I'll be better in the morning. D-Did you say something?” His eyes scan you for a moment before he speaks again. “Yeah, I did, stop when you get to it’s sides. Need to cut off its hands.” You feel his gaze on you and your cheeks burn again.“Y-yes sir.”  He makes a low sound that you think may be a chuckle.  It's a couple of hours after you started dressing the deathclaw together. Lucy, Shroud, and the dog that Cooper has let follow him around have all fallen asleep. You wrap up the last piece of meat when a thought occurs to you. “So Mr. Howard, where is this bounty at?” 
He shoves most of the meat into his saddle bags, looking at you. “About a three days walk from here, you gonna tag along? Could use that eye of yours.”  Tossing him the last piece of meat, you nod. “Yeah, it'll give me time to think of a plan.”  He makes a heh sound, a smirk playing on his lips. “A plan, huh?”  You raise an eyebrow, more curious than anything. “Yeah I mean, plans are good right?” He nods and stuffs the last of the meat into his saddle bag. “They're good but…have you ever made one before sweetheart?”  Part of you knows the nickname is being used in a derogatory way, maybe even a bit patronizing, but it still makes your stomach flip. “Once,” you say, "we had to make a run to a Superduper Mart for supplies. I got us in and out.” You sit cross-legged on the dirt, adjusting your hat. Pulling out a cloth, you begin cleaning the gore off your knife.   Cooper moves closer to start sawing off the hands. “Well,” he starts,” this is different than a Superduper Mart. How many men are on their side?” You wipe the blade as you think. “About twenty… No one else is joining them, but they’re all trained by Ray,” you say quietly, knowing he’s gonna scoff at you. On cue, he stops and laughs, “Oh, sugar, you ain't gonna make it!” You feel your cheeks and ears heat up once again and stammer out, “I–I'm not going in guns blazing if that's what you think, I-I…”  He cuts you off, putting his hand up to you. You can see how the radiation burns swirl and carve into his skin, making a pattern. “The only possible way,” he says,” of you getting back in there and saving Sue is by sneaking in or…” He smiles. Your stomach flips. You can't tell if it's a good flip or not, but you have a feeling you know what he’s thinking.  “Or?” Your voice is small as you ask.  “I take you as hostage and barter to get you back in there. They want y'all for something, they'll come looking.”  You swallow, looking at him a bit apprehensive. “You're gonna take me as a bounty aren't you?”  He points his knife at you. “Bingo! Don't worry, I won't tie you up quite yet.” He shoots you a wink and goes back to sawing off the hand. You're not quite sure what to do with yourself after that. Your heart begins to beat a little faster, not sure if you like that or not. “O-okay, so we'll pretend I'm bounty and sneak in.”  He whistles, finally getting the hand off. “Yup, I'll bring you in and we’ll take it from there. But first we gotta wait till they come for you. When they do, I gotta be a little rough to sell it. You understand don’t ya?” 
You nod, feeling your core beating a bit as you imagine how rough he'll have to be. “Y-yeah I understand, Mr. Howard.”  He hums at you answer, “Good girl. Now go get some sleep like the others. We got a long walk, starting tomorrow.”  You finish wiping the knife off and put it back in its strap. “Yes, sir.” The ghoul waves you off towards the small fire Lucy had made earlier. “Night, Bullseye,” he says lowly in a gruff voice. You give him a slight smile. “Night Mr. Howard.” Reaching the fire, you unroll your bedroll again and get in. The two-day trek to find Cooper began setting into your bones as your eyes flutter shut.   A dream starts to play in your mind as you drift off.  Strange music plays to the beat of hooves against the ground. You see the figure of a man on a horse, riding into the red and orange of the sky as you try to move towards him. It's like you’re  moving in slow motion as you try to reach out to the figure. A cloud of raised dust swirls into the sky as it begins to storm around you and the rider.  His figure and the beast he's on get closer as they rush to you. Their features never clear up, staying smoke and shadow-like as they skid to a stop in front of you. His hand unfurls from the reigns and reaches out towards you. Like a switch going off, the orange and red becomes blue and purple as your stomach flips and you start to sink into the sand beneath your feet. Scrambling, you reach out to the figure's hand but it passes through him. The hand drifted and parted like fog on water after summer rain. As you sink, darkness falls over you and you feel murky and dusty blue water ripple around your waist.  You watch for a moment as the water starts to ripple faster, turning into wake waves that crash into your chest, the coldness washing over you. You look up as a roar shakes the world and a mirelurk queen rises out of the deepest part of the water. You try to run, but your eyelids start to flutter open as the dream fades.  Your eyesight is blurry as you sit up, kicking the blanket off of you. Shroud groans when he feels your legs move. He must have moved over to you during the night. He gives you a look over his shoulder and huffs, before laying his big head back on his paws.  “Sorry buddy, morning,” you say softly, give his head a scratch. You sit up, stretching and yawning. It's quiet for a moment, before you hear Cooper's voice out of nowhere, making you jump. “Morning sleeping beauty, ‘bout time you woke up.” 
You whirl to look at his smirking face, amusement in his eyes from seeing you jump. Putting a hand on your chest to soothe yourself, you mutter to yourself, a bit louder than you mean to,“God you scared me.” He chuckles, “Didn't think I could do that to you anymore darlin’, good to know.” Your heart starts to beat a little faster, no longer because of your fear. You laugh softly, trying to play it off, you look up seeing the sun just about to come up as orange and lavender painting the sky. “H-How long did I sleep for?”  He kisses his teeth and purses his lips as he thinks. “About six hours, give or take, but we gotta get goin’ before it gets too damn hot. So up and at 'em.”   Giving a nod, you get up and roll your bedroll back up and stuff it into your pack. You give Shroud some water and crack open a can of dog food, letting him chow down as you check and strap his armor on. You helped Lucy wake up  pack up as Cooper grumbled at her.  After a few more minutes,everyone is on the road. Both dogs and the 3 of you. It's hot and dry and the continuous crunch of sand and dirt under your boots quickly becomes repetetive. You can see heat waves ooze towards the sky and winds throw the sand around, dusting you and getting into your eyes.  Its monotony for hours on end, sending you into a haze that almost lulls you into a walking sleep. You’ll never know how the creatures here don’t die of heat exhaustion alone. Another hour goes by as Cooper stops, raising his fist in the air to stop you and Lucy.  His head cocks to the side as he listens. You stay still, waiting, trying to listen as well. You can't pick anything up, his senses are much more sensitive than yours. It takes only a few seconds before you hear something scrambling up a dune toward the three of you. The top of its head peeks up above the dune. Cooper's head snaps in its direction and he mutters, “You gotta be fuckin’ kidding me!” 
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bestmcrsongpolls · 6 months
Text
How This Will Work (Pt.2)
link to the first time
All the songs are introduced in the first round, and the pairing are randomized. There are a total of 64 songs; mcr has 58 album songs (including CW) so i added 6 more for the sake of numbers. If you're curious why i choose the specific six and not others send me an ask.
Unlike last time i'll be adding the poll links directly to this post. The (#) is the number of polls that will be posted that week. (The dates are the intended postings if all goes well and for personal reference).
First (10) April 5
Planetary (GO!) vs. I never Told You What I Do For a Living  Sing vs. Vampire Money  Vampires Will Never Hurt You vs. Heaven Help Us  Give 'em Hell Kid vs. Welcome to the Black Parade  S/C/A/R/E/C/R/O/W vs. Early Sunsets Over Monroeville  NA NA NA vs. Desert Song  Sleep  vs. The Ghost of You House of Wolves vs. Hang 'em High  Party Poison  vs. The Sharpest Lives  The Only Hope For Me is You vs. To The End 
Second (10) April 12
Skylines and Turnstiles vs. Famous Last Words Disenchanted  vs. Our Lady of Sorrows Save Yourself I'll Hold Them Back  vs. Honey This Mirror isn't Big Enough For the Two of Us  Thank You for The Venom  vs. The World is Ugly  Teenagers vs. Helena AMBULANCE  vs. Drowning Lessons  Fake Your Death  vs. Cancer  Mama vs. Cemetery Drive  DESTROYA  vs. Make Room!!!
Third (12) April 19
The End vs. This is How I Disappear  I don’t Love You vs. Dead! Kill All Your Friends vs. This is the Best Day Ever You Know What They Do to Guys like Us In Prison vs. The Foundations of Decay  I'm not ok (I Promise) vs. Boy Division  Summertime vs. Surrender the Night  It's not a Fashion Statement, It’s a Deathwish vs. The Jetset Life is Gonna Kill You Gun. vs. Blood  The Light Behind Your Eyes  vs. Burn Bright  Headfirst for Halos vs. Cubicles  Tomorrow Money vs. Demolition Lovers Kiss the Ring  vs. The Kids From Yesterday  Bulletproof Heart vs. My Way Home is Through You
Week Four (8) April 26
DESTROYA vs. Mama Early Sunsets Over Monroeville vs. Give 'em Hell Kid  Vampire Money vs. Thank You For The Venom Disenchanted vs. Helena I never Told You.. vs. House Of Wolves  Drowning Lessons  vs. The Sharpest Lives  ...Prison vs. Famous Last Words Cancer  vs. To The End 
Week five (8) May 3
Sleep  vs. This is How I Disappear NA NA NA  vs. The Light Behind Your Eyes Honey this Mirror... vs. The Kids From Yesterday Vampires Will Never Hurt You vs. Blood  Summertime  vs. Demolition Lovers Bulletproof Heart vs. Dead! Kill All Your Friends vs. Headfirst for Halos Boy division  vs. It's not a Fashion Statement, It’s a Deathwish
Week Six (8) May 10
Mama vs. Bulletproof Heart It's not a Fashion Statement, It’s a Deathwish vs. Vampires Will Never Hurt You This is How I Disappear  vs. Demolition Lovers Kill All Your Friends vs. Honey this Mirror… NA NA NA vs. Dead! I never Told You What I Do For a Living vs. To The End  Helena vs. The Sharpest Lives  Early Sunsets Over Monroeville vs. Thank You For The Venom
Week Seven (4) May 17
Kill All Your Friends vs. Helena Thank You For The Venom vs. Demolition Lovers I never Told You What I Do For a Living vs. Mama Dead! vs. Vampires Will Never Hurt You
Week Eight (2) May 24
Mama vs. Vampires Will Never Hurt You Thank You For the Venom vs. Helena
Week Nine (dif 2) May 31
We all know how this is gonna end but here anyways
Mama vs. Thank You For the Venom
Vampires Will Never Hurt You vs. Helena
(this is a second account btw, main mcr)
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buddiefix · 8 months
Text
Angst (Tsunami/Lawsuit Era) Fic's
The following are some of my favourite buddie fanfictions that involve angst, focusing on S3's tsunami/lawsuit.
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(Any new fic's I find that fall under this category will be added to this post, so feel free to check back for edits!)
To Find Solid Ground by comebacknow
9-1-1 (TV)  
Time heals. At least that's what they say. So that's what Buck repeats to himself.
Language: English Words: 6,718 Chapters: 1/1
a (not so) stary night by an_amalgamation_of_things
9-1-1 (TV)  
One day, after the lawsuit, and before everyone has explicitly made up, Buck goes and watches the ducks. Eddie finds him and eventually they talk
Language: English Words: 5,822 Chapters: 1/1
Healing Through Love by 1_MadHat_1
9-1-1 (TV)  
Because of the lawsuit Buck has been struggling in every possible way, but when he is at his worst he gets a call from Chris' school and it changes everything. OR What if during the lawsuit Buck got a call from Christopher's school because he's listed as an emergency contact and they can't get a hold of Eddie?
Language: English Words: 9,831 Chapters: 1/1
Not Alone by datleggy
9-1-1 (TV)  
Prompt: after the drama with the lawsuit Buck is back but the team are cold and distant or even hostile. Buck tries not to let it get to him but he misses them, especially Eddie who just glares at him. This treatment slowly starts to ware down Buck’s hope that they would all reconcile eventually. It leads to Buck either asking for a transfer or doing something worse. Either way the team, especially Bobby and Eddie realize they let things fester to long. Put as much angst into this as you can!
Language: English Words: 6,924 Chapters: 1/1
Fall On Me by FandomLife54
9-1-1 (TV)  
“Excuse me, sir? Are you Mr. Kishimoto?” The man doesn’t so much as blink. “Right. I was afraid you’d say that.” In one short huff and the very distant gasps of the crowd below, Buck stretches a leg over his own balcony, balancing himself on the edge. That gets the man’s attention.
OR
With things no longer the same after the lawsuit, Buck decides that he needs to leave LA. Before he does, though, the team answers a call to rescue a jumper. Buck's heart-to-heart with the man sets off a mess of reactions that just might convince him he still has a home at the 118.
Language: English Words: 8,344 Chapters: 1/1
what if i surrender (and give in) by chthonicheart
9-1-1 (TV)  
“'Hey, man'?” Eddie repeats, and the weight of disbelief in his tone is the only thing that drowns out the latent anger. “Really? Why the hell are you even here, Buck?”
Language: English Words: 9,965 Chapters: 1/1
a leaf falls on loneliness by iimpossible_things
9-1-1 (TV)  
Buck doesn’t think that if he were to say, “I’m in a bad place”, that anyone would turn him away. Really, he doesn’t. The 118 has too many good, kind people for that.
But every time he wants to open his mouth, to say something, to reach out to Eddie or Bobby or Hen or Chim, he hears Eddie yelling, “you’re exhausting.”
—you’re exhausting, you’re exhausting, you’re exhausting—
So each day he does his job and he laughs and he jokes and he pretends he’s the care-free goofball he’s always been. And each day he packs away his bruises and his worries, takes them home to his empty loft with its quiet rooms, and licks his wounds in silence.
Language: English Words: 11,163 Chapters: 1/1
I would mind by MyArtificialFlowers
9-1-1 (TV)  
He should be scared.
The thought passes through Buck’s mind and it’s true but he doesn’t feel a thing. There is a gun pressed against his head and Bobby looks terrified even if he’s hiding it well. Hen and Chimney look scared as well, looking up at him, frozen, from where they’re kneeled beside the kid. And Eddie, well, he doesn’t look scared exactly, but he looks angry and at least that is a feeling. It’s more than the numbness that is wrapping itself around every inch of Buck.
or
Buck is depressed and when his life is threatened during a call, things sort of slip out in the aftermath
Language: English Words: 3,299 Chapters: 1/1
Tread Lightly by an_alternate_world
9-1-1 (TV)  
Healing after a truck bombing, breakup, pulmonary embolism, tsunami and lawsuit is a slow process when you're afraid to talk to your team when it feels like the world is crumbling in on you. Finding your way out of the crippling darkness is a lonely process when you're afraid you'll get benched again for something beyond your control. Learning to love again is a terrifying process when you're not sure your best friend will ever truly forgive you.
Language: English Words: 151,278 Chapters: 36/36
(Friendly reminder I do not own any of the works listed in this post, and all can be located on archiveofoureown.org)
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laalaaliaa · 2 years
Note
Hi, I got Dick Grayson request
He and the girlfriend!reader are both detectives, working on the same case making a bet who will crack it faster. One day, when the batfamily is on patrol (mission, whatev. - she knows about their secret identities) she sneaks into batcave to use the Wayne technology to get ahead. Of course, she gets caught by Dick, who teases her and maybe kisses or tickles her up to the point when she confesses to being a cheater (you know - no holds barred, take any liberty you want on that since Dick can be pretty persuasive :D )
TY :)
Lovers Quarrel
in which you try to one up dick grayson
dick grayson x fem!girlfriend!reader
warnings: reader being a big fat cheater, terrible depiction of detective work, Dick being sooo cocky
proofread: no
hi thank you for the request, i do hope you enjoy!
_________ ׂׂૢ་༘࿐
You were stubborn without a doubt. Whether it be a bad trait, Dick found it adorable. Whenever the two of you got into disagreements, which was often, you'd give him the silent treatment. It wouldn't last long though, Dick Grayson was a smooth talker. Like right now, the two of you were in the Blüdhaven police department, heads buried deep in paperwork. A few days ago, two to be exact, the two of you were assigned the same case. A faceless murderer terrorizing the streets at night. The killer already claimed multiple victims, all in the span of three nights. You insisted on taking charge on the case, being one the youngest in the department, and the most consistent when it came to homicide cases.
Dick also felt the need to take charge as well. Maybe it was in his nature, often leading cases in the department, causing a bet to arise. You were stubborn, so in your nature you accepted. As of right now, you regret ever accepting his stupid bet, but you'd never admit that. You let out a frustrated sigh, throwing down the file you've read over millions of times. There wasn't much for you to work with, blurry CCTV footage, and a vague description of what the killer possibly looked like. You were lost.
You were brooding, and it seemed to be obvious the minute Dick placed a hot cup of coffee on your desk, "What's with the frowny face?" He teased, setting himself on the corner of your desk as he pressed his thumb against the crease between your brows, rubbing it playfully. You slapped his hand away, a faint quirk to your lips as you lifted the cup to your lips. "No idea what you're talking about Detective Grayson." You sighed out, the taste of burnt coffee left on your tongue. "If it makes you feel better, I have a lead." He chimed victoriously, a smirk on his lips as he took in your annoyed expression.
"Get out." You groaned out, standing to your feet as you tiredly dragged him towards the door leading out of your office. He held his hands up in surrender, turning to face you once more. "I just wanted to let you know I'm heading out early, Bruce needs me." That was all you needed to hear, nodding your head in understanding as you smiled genuinely. "Be safe, and don't be upset if I solve this case before you." You teased, letting a small laugh out as he rolled his eyes. He pressed a long kiss to your lips, pulling back with a smile as he mouthed a 'bye'.
An hour passed, and with nothing to work with you left the department. You decided to return back to crime scene, in hopes you'd find more clues to get you further. The alleyway looked horrific, and you couldn't help but keep a close hand on the gun in your holster. What could you have missed? That was the question at hand. You retraced your steps from the first time you arrived, you sought everything. With a harsh sigh you closed the blank notepad in hand, only to flinch when something landed on your head. Your head tilted up, catching sight of a ladder. You knew it was there the first time you showed up to the crime scene, yet this time the ladder was pulled down, making where ever it led, accessible.
Was your idea possibly stupid? Yes, but the urge to progress further than your cocky boyfriend was gnawing at your brain. So you did it, climbing up the wet ladder and reaching the top, slightly out of breath. What you found was shocking, none of the detectives at the scene thought it'd be useful to raid the abandoned buildings nearby, assuming it was another killer without motive, yet once you stepped inside the tiny storage room nestled on top of the abandoned bakery, your mouth fell open. Walls filled with pictures of people, those deceased and those still among the living. Papers filled with information on all sorts of people. There were places marked throughout Blüdhaven, some in Gotham as well, leading you to believe that the case was much more than a homicide.
_________
Bruce had a lovely home. It was large, hidden, and had a homey vibe to it. You knew it was a bad idea to show up to his home, however, there was no way he'd know you were there. You knew he'd be busy till the early morning, giving you enough time to use the advanced technology his bat computer contained. With a brisk knock to large oak double doors, you shifted on your feet impatiently, eyes settled the large 'W' on the door. You stood straight once the door opened, coming eye to eye with Alfred who had a welcoming smile on his face. "Miss Y/N, to what do I owe the pleasure?" You smiled back, clearing your throat as you replied meekly, "Alfred, I was wondering if I could use Bruce's computer for a quick moment." He seemed a little confused, but welcomed you in nonetheless.
The moment you stepped inside the home, the harsh aroma of food hit your nostrils, making you hold your stomach weakly. Bruce was a lucky man, home cooked meals everyday, you were jealous. Your attention shifted once Alfred bid you to follow, prompting you to rid of those annoying thoughts as you followed behind him. He led you down to the cave, the gloomy mood of the cave making you shiver slightly. With what you assumed was Alfred mumbling about food in the kitchen, he left you, allowing you access to everything and anything on the computer. You wasted no time, sitting down in the large chair settled in front of the large monitor. Bruce sure did have a knack for large things.
You didn't know how long you were in the cave for, but you knew for a fact that you were progressing further than Dick ever could, making your ego inflate slightly. You couldn't wait to throw your newfound discoveries in his face, without him ever knowing you cheated. From what you found; the murders were connected to people who seemed to owe money to someone, that part you haven't found out yet, however you were able to connect the writing of some papers you found in the storage room to a no-good thug. You had your murderer, but no motive, it was a start though. You leaned into the chair with a pleased sigh, arms crossed as you relaxed your tensed muscles.
"I'm highly disappointed Y/N."
You let out a loud squeak, a hand on your chest as the chair was turned to face the perpetrator. Dick stood above you, his eyes covered by his domino mask, but his smirk was bigger than ever. You slapped his arm harshly, your heart beating out of your chest as you scowled. "Richard John Grayson, never do that again." You chided, his smirk never once fading as he took off his mask, his dark blue eyes shining with mirth. He directed his gaze towards the monitor, the screen filled with images of the man you assumed was terrorizing the city you were sworn to protect.
He leaned down, arms on both sides of the chair as he leaned close. You shifted at the proximity, arms still crossed as you held his gaze. He licked his lips, voice filled with rasp as he crooned out, "I didn't think you were a cheater baby." You rolled your eyes, cheeks going red, whether it be from embarrassment or from the pet name. "I'm not a cheater" You whispered weakly, taking the liberty to brush a stray hair from his forehead. He hummed appreciatively, licking his lips. "You're a sore loser y'know?" You hummed in acknowledgment.
He tsked' softly, a hand held towards you, prompting you to stand. You took his hand to stand, a faux embarrassed look casted upon your face as you sighed, "I know I cheated," You started solemnly, gaze downcast as you frowned. Once you looked back up, you had a cocky smile on your face, "But I'm beating you." You laughed out, your ego on full blast. Dick rolled his eyes, wrapping an arm around your waist as he smiled down at you. " Cheaters gotta face the consequences." He pointed out, his half smirk making you weak in the knees.
He pulled you close, tilting your head slightly as his thumb traced your jaw gently. He leaned close, pressing a kiss to your lips. Then another one, and another one, until you couldn't breathe. You pulled away, his lips trailing down your jaw, to the side of your neck. As much as you appreciated his kisses you had to pull away. The PDA becoming too intense, and the side eye Bruce was giving was terrifying. "Okay, you're right I cheated." He sighed dramatically, head thrown back as he stared at the ceiling. "Once we get home, you owe me." He pestered, a suggestive look on his face once he stared back at you.
"Oh yeah?"
"Yeah, I have an idea of how this'll play out..."
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