#team fortress two guide

[madamepestilence]

TF2: HOW TO FIGHT AGAINST THE BOTS

For those of you interested in TF2 and sick of the bots, I spent literally 8 1/2 hours last night typing up this guide on how to fight back against them

[meiliarotten]

Team Fortress 2 Kinktober Time Three: Return of the Kink

Day 15: A Tactile Experience (Blindfolds)

🔞MINORS DNI🔞

Pairings: Pyro x Fem!Reader

Summary: Pyro doesn’t like to take their mask off in front of others, so you come up with a clever little work around

Tags: Blindfolds, nonverbal Pyro, they/them Pyro, nonverbal communication, oral, praise

Word Count: 2.2k

The Masterlist

Pyro’s room was the warmest area in the base. During the day it was insufferable, nearly sweltering. Only Pyro themselves could stand it. However, at night when the desert grew cold, there was nowhere you would rather be. Tonight you were especially grateful for the warmth. You would certainly be shivering otherwise, having stripped off all of your clothing. The only scrap of fabric left on your body was the one that was currently being tied over your eyes.

The blindfold was soft and silky. You couldn’t help but wonder where exactly Pyro had managed to acquire one of such high quality. There was a gentle tug at the back of your head as the blindfold was secured in place. A gloved hand came to rest on your shoulder. Here was where the difficult part would begin. Sign language was how the two of you would usually communicate, but it would prove useless without your ability to see, so you would need to rely on touch alone, as well as the occasional murmur from Pyro. You were never one to back down from a challenge, though.

“Go on,” you whispered. You placed your own hand atop Pyro’s squeezing gently, letting them know that you were alright, and ready- eager, even- to proceed.

Pyro kept at least one hand on you at all times as they moved, letting you know where they were. Eventually they had made their way in front of you, taking your hands in theirs and guiding them forward until you felt rubber and metal. You ran your fingers along the zipper of Pyro’s suit, following the seam upwards until you reached the top.

“May I?” You asked, caressing the side of Pyro’s mask with your free hand while giving the zipper a gentle tug. You heard a soft murmur and felt them lean into your touch with a nod.

You pulled the zipper down, stopping once you reached the bottom. For the first time since starting, you felt lost without your sight, unsure how to proceed. Hesitantly, you ran your hands up Pyro’s body, and muscle memory soon kicked in. You lingered on the edges where the familiar texture of burn scars gave way to smooth, untouched skin. While the scarred flesh itself didn’t have much sensation at all due to the damage, the edges were surprisingly sensitive. With a gentle touch, it could be quite pleasurable.

This process was your favorite part. The sex itself was nice, amazing even, but warming each other up like this was something else- nothing but slow, soft touches, steady and relaxed, pure tactile sensation with no expectations. It was like a ritual, both of you finding comfort in the routine, going through the motions in near-silence save for soft gasps and sighs.

You weren’t sure when Pyro removed their gloves, only noticing when they rested their hands on your shoulders, calloused and rough from handling heavy equipment day after day. You reached up to guide them down to your chest, a soft smile on your lips. You felt them jolt slightly, unused to such a brazen display from you. Pyro always started at your shoulders, and usually you would glance downwards with heavy lidded eyes, a silent request that gave them permission to venture lower. With the blindfold, you needed to be a bit more bold.

“Sorry,” you whispered. “I didn’t mean to startle you.” You leaned into Pyro’s touch as they began to caress your chest. They made a sound akin to a hum before squeezing your breasts suddenly. You yelped, hearing muffled laughter that you couldn’t help but join in on once you had regained your composure. “Well, I guess we’re even now!”

You could tell from the heat rising in your cheeks that you were already going red, a bit embarrassed that simply having your tits squeezed could catch you off guard. Then again, everything seemed so much more intense when you were deprived of your sight. It was like all your other senses were trying to fill in the blanks, compensating for the loss with heightened sensitivity.

Pyro continued to play with your chest for a while, drawing soft moans from you. “I want-” you cut yourself off with a gasp when Pyro let their nails graze your skin, just enough to leave goosebumps in their wake and send a shiver down your spine. “I want to kiss you,” you said, the slightest hint of desperation in your voice. “Please.”

They stopped short. You held your breath for a moment, wondering if you were moving too fast. You felt Pyro’s hands brushing against the fabric of the blindfold. “Don’t worry. It’s on nice and tight,” you reassured them.

Pyro took your hands in theirs again, and you were surprised when they guided you up towards their neck until you were touching the smooth rubber-like material of a gas mask. The message was clear enough. You carefully slipped your fingers beneath the edge of the mask, pulling it upward, letting Pyro adjust your grip every so often until you felt the mask come away, hanging loosely in your hands. Pyro took it from you, presumably laying it aside.

Their breathing came hard and heavy, much like it did beneath the mask, but the sound was clearer. That would take some getting used to. Pyro didn’t exactly speak, at least not in any conventional way, but even so, their unmuffled murmurs and laughter may be jarring. Yet the thought of hearing it, and even moreso, that they trusted you enough to let you hear it, brought a smile to your face.

You draped your arms over their shoulders, leaning forward until you were chest to chest with them. Pyro cupped the back of your head in one hand, letting the other wrap around your waist to pull you even closer. The first kiss grazed your cheek before they moved quickly towards your lips. Those first pecks were shy, chaste, and tentative. You felt them shudder when you let your lips part, taking the first step to deepen the kiss, but they didn’t pull away.

You pressed on, flicking your tongue gently against theirs while they cradled the back of your head so delicately, as if afraid you would break. After letting you take the lead for a bit, Pyro began to kiss back. They were uncoordinated, but what they lacked in grace they made up for with pure enthusiasm. It wasn’t long before you had to part for breath, the fervor leaving you panting. You brushed the back of your hand against Pyro’s cheek, finding that the scars even extended up to their face. They leaned into your touch, humming softly. The sound reminded you of a cat’s purr.

That thought alone made you wonder, just how touch starved was Pyro after spending most of their days clad head to toe in thick, flame resistant material? Slowly, you moved your hand up to weave through a mop of tangled hair. You couldn’t tell for sure, but if you had to guess, the texture was slightly curly. That gesture caused Pyro to pull you against them, pressing you against their chest. Their grip was so tight, you could barely squirm. That alone answered your question- they were very touch starved indeed.

Hell, even on prior occasions when the two of you had been intimate, that mask had never come off. Feeling you kiss and caress their face must have been overwhelming. You stayed like that for a while, running your fingers through Pyro’s hair, being careful not to accidentally pull at the tangles and knots. They hummed louder, and you could feel the vibrations in their chest which only strengthened your earlier comparison to a purring cat.

You weren’t sure how long the two of you stayed like that before Pyro began to push you back, slowly laying you down on the bed. The pillow was cool against your cheek. You rubbed your hands along the bedsheets, trying to reorient yourself. “Pyro?” you said, voice barely above a whisper. You had lost track of where your partner was until you felt their hand on your thigh.

They squeezed gently, as if to reassure you that they were still here. After that Pyro made an effort to stay in contact with you, whether it be a hand brushing against your leg or a soft murmur that could indicate where they had moved. They were moving lower, you realized, descending down your body until you felt the subtle brush of an exhale against your inner thigh.

“Fuck,” you sighed, feeling a shudder of anticipation run through you. You hadn’t even realized just how aroused you were. When did you become so wet? Probably when the two of you were making out. To be honest, finally being able to kiss Pyro was quite exhilarating, and what was about to happen would be even more so, if they would only get on with it. “Please,” you whimpered, trying your best not to squirm too much.

That was all the encouragement they needed. Pyro didn’t hesitate, diving in with unmatched enthusiasm. You nearly bucked forward and the sensation of their tongue, their hands latching onto your hips and holding you still at the last minute. While they certainly lacked experience, they were a quick learner and quite attentive when it came to taking directions.

“Just a little higher- yes, yes, right there!” you whined, clutching the sheets in tight fists as they began to caress your clit with their tongue in a gentle, pulsing rhythm. “Fuck, you’re doing so good.”

Pyro moaned against you, those subtle vibrations sending shockwaves of pleasure through you. Oh, they were weak when it came to praise. Even on the battlefield, when you or one of the other mercenaries complimented their work, they would puff out their chest, practically beaming with pride through the mask they wore. It only made sense that such a trait would translate into the bedroom as well.

“So good, you’re so good to me,” you began to ramble, chasing more of those sweet moans that felt heavenly against your clit. You had never gotten this close so fast before. You were panting, pleading, right on the edge of bliss, and despite all your attempts to hold back, to make it last just the slightest bit longer, your body eventually gave in.

You trembled, your voice surprisingly soft as it seemed you had suddenly remembered that there were in fact other people living in the base. You pressed a hand to your mouth to stifle the few louder moans that did manage to escape as you rode out the aftershocks. You weren’t sure how long you stayed like that before your muscles went slack and practically sank into the plush mattress. Absentmindedly, you reached up to touch the blindfold, feeling the soft material beneath your fingertips. To think such a little strip of fabric could make everything feel so intense. You could certainly get used to it.

Pyro stayed where they were for a moment, holding your thighs, squeezing them as they trembled in their grasp. So soft and plush. They loved all the nice, squishable, soft parts of you, from your chest to your stomach to your thighs. From the moment they first laid hands on you, they had wanted to kiss all over those parts, and now, they realized that they could.

You giggled as Pyro pressed soft kisses against your inner thighs, trailing their way back up your body at a leisurely pace. “That tickles!” you said as they reached your jaw, only to be silenced when they finally reached your lips again. “Pyro,” you sighed between kisses, dazed and high on the afterglow. “That was really fucking good.”

Suddenly you realized something, and a pang of guilt hit you. You sat up suddenly, almost toppling off the bed from the wave vertigo it caused. “What about you?” you said. “It’s only fair that I help you out too.” You rested your hand on Pyro’s chest, feeling the gradual rise and fall of their breath, descending downward towards their crotch until-

Pyro whined, quickly pulling your hand away with a shudder of discomfort. You tilted your head, confused. Pyro hated being overstimulated, and you were familiar with the signs that indicated they were in such a state. But how could that be when you hadn’t even…

“Did you already…?” You tailed off, unsure if your suspicions were correct. Pyro mumbled something, and while you couldn’t make out any concrete words, you could tell their tone was bashful. If you could see their face right now, they would probably be going red. “Just from eating me out?” you chuckled. “That’s kind of hot, actually.”

Pyro pulled you into their embrace suddenly enough to send you both falling back against the bed with a yelp. You didn’t mind a bit though. You could easily fall asleep right here, the afterglow beginning to fade and exhaustion taking its place.

“You know, this blindfold is really soft. I could wear it to bed, so you don’t have to put your mask back on.” You didn’t receive a response, but after a moment Pyro pressed their lips to your forehead, and you could feel the corners of their mouth turned upward in a smile. That was all the confirmation you needed. With a sleepy smile of your own, you settled in for the night, letting sleep take over.

[bowletta]

SRMTHFG Watch Guide

Hi everyone! I made a list for newcomers who are interested in watching SRMT but don't know where to start! : ]

'Super Robot Monkey Team Hyperforce Go!' (Yes, that's really the title, 'SRMTHFG' for short) was a cartoon that aired from 2004-2006 on Jetix/Disney Channel.

It's about a boy and his team of cybernetic monkeys saving the universe from the evil Skeleton King. It sounds ridiculous... but it is so unironically good. There is plot. There is trauma. There are wacky antics. You can watch the entire series on YouTube, in HD, for free lol.

There's two versions of the show:

1080p HD, widescreen, censored (YouTube Link)

480-720p, cropped, uncensored (YouTube Link)

Personally I would recommend the HD cut. I am working on compiling every censored scene, nearly all of which are under 3 seconds (graphic violence, blood, etc.).

Under the read more is a guide to what episodes to watch, avoid, etc.

Symbol Guide:

Regular Text: Fine episode, but not required

*: Plot relevant

Bold Text: Good episode

Red: REALLY good episode

Strikethrough: Bad. Skip.

Season 1:

Chiro's Girl*

Depths of Fear

Planetoid Q

Magnetic Menace

The Sun Riders

Secret of the Sixth Monkey*

Pit of Doom*

Thingy

Flytor

A Man Called Krinkle

Ape New World

Circus of Ooze

Hidden Fortress*

Season 2:

Skeleton King*

World of Giants

The Lords of Soturix 7

In the Grip of Evil*

Versus Chiro*

Shadow Over Shuggazoom

The Sun Riders Return

Hunt for the Citadel of Bone*

Snowbound*

Wonder Fun Meat World

The Skeleton King Threat

Antauri's Masters*

I, Chiro*

Season 3:

The Savage Lands: Part I*

The Savage Lands: Part II*

Season of the Skull

A Ghost in the Machinder*

The Stranded Seven

Girl Trouble

Brothers in Arms

Monster Battle Club Now!

Meet the Wigglenog

Big Lug

Prototype*

Wormhole*

Belly of the Beast*

Season 4:

Galactic Smash: Space Attack

Galactic Smash: Game Over

Incident on Ranger 7

Ghosts of Shuggazoom*

Invasion of the Vreen

Evil Ages

Night of Fear*

The Hills Have Five

Demon of the Deep

Secret Society*

Golden Age*

Object of Hate*

Soul of Evil*

TLDR; Here's a condensed list of good/plot episodes you should watch if you don't want to watch all 52 episodes VVV

Season 1:

EP 1 - Chiro's Girl*

EP 6 - Secret of the Sixth Monkey*

EP 7 - Pit of Doom*

EP 8 - Thingy

EP 13 - Hidden Fortress*

Season 2:

EP 1 - Skeleton King*

EP 4 - In the Grip of Evil*

EP 5 - Versus Chiro*

EP 8 - Hunt for the Citadel of Bone*

EP 9 - Snowbound*

EP 12 - Antauri's Masters*

EP 13 - I, Chiro* (Best EP of the series in my opinion)

Season 3:

EP 1 - The Savage Lands Part I*

EP 2 - The Savage Lands Part II*

EP 4 - A Ghost in the Machinder*

EP 5 - The Stranded Seven

EP 7 - Brothers in Arms

EP 10 - Big Lug (SO many good reaction faces)

EP 11 - Prototype*

EP 12 - Wormhole*

EP 13 - Belly of the Beast* (Tied with I, Chiro for best EP)

Season 4:

EP 4 - Ghosts of Shuggazoom*

EP 5 - Invasion of the Vreen

EP 7 - Night of Fear*

EP 9 - Demon of the Deep

EP 10 - Secret Society*

EP 11 - Golden Age*

EP 12 - Object of Hate*

EP 13 - Soul of Evil*

Thank you all for coming to my TED Talk on these silly monkeys lol, I hope you all have fun watching!

(Gif by @/sweetcircuits)

[cynicalrosebud]

Echoes of Duty (COD Sentinel AU) - Chp 4

Echoes of Duty Masterlist

Warnings: Canon-typical violence; You are responsible for your own media consumption

The mission had been straightforward on paper—a simple reconnaissance run. In and out, minimal contact, Price had said. But even the most routine operations had a way of turning chaotic. It all fell apart within minutes, and Y/n felt the shift deep within the bond before she even heard the crackle of gunfire over the comms.

With each of her Sentinels scattered across different positions, Y/n found herself stretched far too thin. Price led the team from the front, Soap flanked their position, Ghost moved unseen in the shadows, and Gaz was monitoring their surroundings from high ground. It should have been manageable. But when the ambush hit, everything changed.

The sudden surge of adrenaline from all four of them hit her like a freight train, crashing through her mind, making it nearly impossible to focus. The bond—so fresh and new—flared to life, blazing with intensity she hadn’t expected so soon. Each of her Sentinels needed her, pulling on the connection, relying on her to ground them in the chaos. But the strain was too much, too fast.

Her chest tightened, and her breath came in short, ragged gasps as she tried to stay tethered to all four of them. Her vision blurred, and her head pounded with the force of their combined sensory overload. She could feel their disorientation, their need for her, flooding through the bond. And she was barely holding on.

I can’t… I can’t do this.

“Y/n, report.” Price’s voice came through the comm, calm and steady, but she could feel the urgency beneath it. He was relying on her to keep the team together, to guide them through the storm.

She gritted her teeth, forcing herself to focus, pushing past the searing pain in her head. "I’m with you, Johnny," she whispered, reaching out to Soap first. His senses were spinning out of control, the sharp crack of gunfire and the overwhelming stench of smoke disorienting him. "Just breathe, focus on my voice. Hold the line, you’ve got this."

She felt his mind latch onto hers, the chaotic swirl of his thoughts starting to calm. One down.

"Kyle," she gasped, reaching out to Gaz next. He was struggling with the overwhelming flood of visual data, scanning the skies for threats. His fear of missing something, of failing the team, hit her hard. "Stay steady. I’m with you. Don’t panic. You’re doing great."

His tension eased slightly, the frantic edge of his emotions softening as she soothed him. Two down.

"Simon." Ghost’s mind was like a fortress, normally so impenetrable, but even he wasn’t immune to the strain. His hearing was overwhelmed, every sound too sharp, too loud, distorting his focus. "You’ve got this, Simon. Stay in the shadows. Trust yourself."

She felt him ground himself through the bond, his overwhelming sensory input fading into control. Three down.

And then there was Price. Steady as ever, but she could feel the weight he carried—responsibility, leadership, fear for his team. He didn’t speak, but she could feel him reaching for her, needing her presence to steady him as he led the charge.

"John..." she whispered, her voice strained. "Stay with me."

He didn’t respond with words, but she felt the connection strengthen, his mind settling as he focused. Four down. For now.

But the strain on her was unbearable. Her head felt like it was being split open, the pressure of maintaining the bond with all four Sentinels at once pushing her past her limits. Her knees buckled, and her vision tunneled. She forced herself to stay upright, to keep them grounded. But something inside her snapped.

A sharp pain shot through her skull, and her mind fractured under the pressure. The bond stretched too thin, too far, and then everything went black.

When Y/n woke, she was surrounded. The familiar weight of their presence pressed in on her from all sides, comforting but heavy with concern. Her head throbbed, the remnants of the strain still lingering, and her body felt like it had been wrung out and left to dry.

She blinked slowly, her vision swimming before it settled on the figures around her.

Price sat by her bedside, his eyes sharp but softened by worry. He didn’t say anything, but she could feel the weight of his relief through the bond. Ghost stood in the corner, arms crossed, his silent vigilance reassuring in its own way. Soap was the closest, perched on the edge of her bed with his usual teasing grin, though the tension in his shoulders betrayed his worry. And Gaz stood by the door, pacing back and forth, his brow furrowed deeply.

"You scared the hell outta us," Gaz muttered, his voice thick with emotion as he stopped pacing long enough to meet her gaze. "Don’t do that again."

Y/n smiled weakly, though it took more effort than she wanted to admit. "I’m fine. You’re all fine."

"Thanks to you," Price said softly, his voice a low rumble. He reached out, brushing a strand of hair away from her face with surprising tenderness. "You keep us grounded, love. We couldn’t have made it through without you."

Soap scoffed lightly, though his grin didn’t reach his eyes. "Yer a right mess, lass. Nearly gave us all a bloody heart attack."

"I’m sorry," she whispered, her voice barely audible. She hated that she had worried them, hated that she hadn’t been strong enough to hold the bond without breaking.

But Price shook his head. "No apologies, Y/n. You did your job. More than that."

Ghost’s voice, low and steady, cut through the air. "You pushed yourself too far. Tha' was our fault, not yours."

Y/n felt the emotion swelling in her chest, the weight of their concern pressing down on her. She had never felt this close to them before—not even after the bond bites. This was different. They weren’t just her Sentinels. They were her family.

"I thought…" she hesitated, her voice cracking slightly as the vulnerability crept in. "I thought I wasn’t strong enough to protect you."

Price’s hand found hers, and he squeezed it gently. "You’re strong enough, Y/n. More than you know."

Soap leaned in, his usual bravado softened by the sincerity in his voice. "Aye, lass. Ye’ve got us all wrapped around yer finger, whether ye know it or not."

Y/n’s throat tightened with emotion. She had pushed herself beyond her limits because she was afraid of letting them down—afraid of failing her Sentinels. But looking at them now, she realized that she wasn’t the only one holding the bond. They held her too.

Gaz finally stepped forward, his usual calm demeanor cracked by the worry still evident in his eyes. "You’re not alone in this, Y/n. We’re in this together. You don’t have to carry it all on your own."

She nodded, swallowing the lump in her throat. "I know. I just... I didn’t want to fail you."

Price squeezed her hand again, his voice low and comforting. "You’ll never fail us, love. Not as long as we’re together."

For the first time since the mission started, Y/n let herself relax. The bond between them, though strained, held strong. They were connected, not just by duty, but by something deeper—trust, loyalty, and an unbreakable bond that no ambush or chaos could tear apart.

As she lay there, surrounded by the people who had become her world, Y/n realized that she wasn’t just a Guide anymore. She was their Guide. And together, they were stronger than any one of them could ever be alone.

A quiet chuckle broke the silence, and Y/n blinked up at Soap, whose teasing grin had returned full force.

"Seriously, lass, ye've gotta stop with the dramatics. I’ve aged about ten years from this whole mess."

"Speak for yourself," Gaz muttered, though his lips twitched in a small smile. "Think I’ve gone completely gray."

"Gray?" Soap snorted, glancing at him. "Mate, you’re not that old."

"Not yet, but give it time." Gaz shot back, crossing his arms.

Y/n groaned softly, smiling despite the exhaustion weighing her down. "I’m supposed to be the one keeping you grounded, remember?"

Price leaned back in his chair, a rare smile tugging at his lips. "Seems like we’ll be keepin' each other grounded from now on."

"Good luck with tha'," Ghost rumbled from the corner, his voice laced with dry humor. "This lot’s a handful."

"Oi, speak fer yourself," Soap quipped. "You’re part o' the mess."

"Unfortunately," Ghost deadpanned, but his eyes were warm beneath the mask.

Y/n’s heart swelled with affection, a quiet laugh escaping her. "Guess we’re all stuck with each other then."

"And we wouldn’t have it any other way," Price added softly, his hand still resting on hers, the bond between them all humming with quiet strength.

[dorenarox]

Guys I need a guide on how Steam trading (specifically for Team Fortress 2 items, if that makes a difference) works. I need several specific situations like :

How does it work without two factor auth?

How does it work when someone does a gift trade with someone without two factor auth?

How does it work when someone without two factor auth does a gift trade with someone who has it?

How does it work if someone without two factor auth trades to someone else without two factor auth?

Is it different the older the account and/or the longer you are befriended?

Any additional information also welcome.

I don't have two factor auth.

[wyllzel]

A Brief Honor Mode Reflection 🎆

Hello!! Now that I've beaten BG3's HM (on Patch 6, Hotfix 19), I am here to share my builds (and a mini retrospective). 🥳👋

My team relied on stealth, a few instances of barrelmancy, and some amoral choices... 😔 But we did not use any illithid powers!

I did not have a main party and instead swapped characters out depending on the situation. I did my best to remember how combat encounters played out, and prepared accordingly! If I was really worried about an encounter, I tried to follow these awesome guide videos from YouTuber neek. 😁

(Possible spoilers ahead!)

Party Builds

The party that I brought to the final battle against the Netherbrain! A lot of white hair, lol.

Unfortunately, I don't remember my party's exact stats and I can't go into an old save to find them (haha) so I'll do my best to remember their key traits/items here.

All of my party members took the Alert Feat at Level 8! I consider this feat key, if not necessary, to winning Honor Mode.

Tav (Asa): 12 Monk, Way of the Open Hand (Drow)

20 STR / 14 DEX / 23 CON / 8 INT / 16 WIS / 10 CHA

Tavern Brawler Feat

Helldusk Armor

Gloves of Soul Catching

Amulet of Greater Health

Haste Helm

Boots of Uninhibited Kushigo

I got Asa to 20 STR by starting her off with 17 STR, using her Level 4 feat to take Tavern Brawler (+1), then pressuring Astarion for Araj Oblodra's potion (+2). (😭)

A Way of the Open Hand Monk is a superb DPR hitter that can also apply handy conditions to bosses, such as Stunned or Prone. It's a popular class with powergamers, and for good reason!! Personally, I really like it because I can pretend to be a wuxia heroine, haha.

Gale: 12 Wizard, Abjuration School

I don't remember his exact stats unfortunately, but I prioritized INT (20), DEX, and CON.

Robe of the Weave

Markoheshkir

Viconia's Walking Fortress

Gloves of Belligerent Skies

Boots of Stormy Clamor

Psychic Spark

Abjuration Wizard can hugely increase your chances at survival with Arcane Ward. My party was basically invincible by the time we reached Level 10, thanks to Gale's Arcane Ward and Shadowheart's Warding Flare!

I had Gale carry the Spellsparkler staff for basically all of Acts 1 and 2. I'm a huge fan, especially when combo-ing it with Magic Missile. 😁

Astarion (Vampire Ascendant): 4 Rogue (Thief) / 6 Ranger (Gloom Stalker) / 2 Fighter

See my build guide for Ascended Astarion! I followed that, but took his last two levels in Fighter rather than sticking with Ranger. Fighter's Action Surge came in handy a few times.

I forewent the Alert Feat on Astarion in favor of an ASI (+2 to DEX). His Initiative was already very high due to Gloom Stalker Ranger's Dread Ambusher.

Alongside my Tav (Asa), Astarion was easily doing the most DPR.

Shadowheart: 12 Cleric, Light Domain

I have a proper build guide in the works 😁 but I highly recommend prioritizing WIS, CON, and DEX if you can!

Amulet of the Devout

Luminous Armor

Luminous Gloves

Boots of Striding

Selûne's Spear of Night

Ketheric's Shield

Callous Glow Ring

Coruscation Ring

This build does highly rely on Radiant Damage, and there are a few enemies who punish you for using Radiant Damage (ie. the Undead Justiciars, Raphael, Viconia) - so be careful about where you're using her and how!

In most cases (especially with Invisible enemies), I had Shadowheart start by dropping a Radiance of the Dawn among clustered enemies. Thanks to her gear, this delivered a mass output of Radiant Damage and Radiating Orbs.

EDIT: Guide completed and posted on March 2, 2024!

Wyll: 12 Warlock, The Fiend, Pact of the Blade

See my build guide for Fiend Bladelock Wyll!

Unfortunately, the gear in the above guide ended up overlapping with other characters :') So instead of being a frontliner in this run, he was largely Eldritch Blasting and acting as the Party Face. As such, I had him in the following:

Potent Robe

Hat of the Sharp Caster

Daredevil Gloves

Envoy's Amulet

Band of the Mystic Scoundrel

Ring of Arcane Synergy

Lae'zel: 12 Paladin, Oath of Vengeance

Lae'zel was sadly kidnapped and killed by Orin. 😞 So her build isn't as complete, but I had her in the following for most of Acts 1 and 2:

Adamantine Splint Armor

Sussur Greatsword ➡️ Soulbreaker Greatsword

Crusher's Ring

Gloves of the Growling Underdog

Like my Tav (Asa) and Astarion, I would bring in Lae'zel when I needed an extra heavy DPR hitter! Paladins are a very powerful class if you don't mind Long Resting often, especially in the early game before you get Extra Attack on martials at Level 5.

Retrospective

To be honest, I'd already beaten the game five times (oops! 🥲) before completing my Honor Run. 😆 So I had a huge leg up just by virtue of remembering which encounters were where, and what was the best way to beat them! IMO, Foreknowledge, Initiative, and Stealth/Surprise are king in Honor Mode.

I also followed some tips that I normally find overly tedious:

Donate gold to traders to get better prices when buying + more gold when selling.

Meticulously collect camp supplies and barrels, especially smokepowder barrels.

Stock up on Invisibility Potions in case you need to Flee a combat.

Stock up on Strength Potions (Hill Giant, Cloud Giant) for your Strength-based builds, so you can prioritize other Ability Scores - particularly in the early game.

Always try to initiate combat with Surprise if you can.

Make good use of Shadowheart's buff spells!! I don't know why I never used Enhance Ability and Calm Emotions before this, haha!

Get two Hirelings through Withers: one Transmutation Wizard and one Cleric. The wizard was our camp alchemist, and the cleric was our camp buffer (Heroes' Feast, Freedom of Movement, upcasted Aid).

I even cut a deal with Philomeen for her Runepowder Vial then entered turn-based mode to kill her before she could flee the scene, thus securing the Runepowder Barrel as well. 😭

Sadly, I very much set aside my moral code for this run. :') Astarion got the extremely, extremely short end of the stick 😞 - and unfortunately, so did Wyll. 😭 I broke his pact with Mizora, but instead of rescuing his father and properly closing out Wyll's companion quest, I skipped the Iron Throne and Wyrmway quests... (I did not like my chances against the Steelwatch and Ansur...)

So, after fully building my party, we ended up briefly allying with Gortash (IYKYK haha) and heading straight for the Brain. Orpheus was our team's Mind Flayer.

The items I brought with me to the final Brain fight include:

4 Elixirs of Psychic Resistance

8 Potions of Flying (though I only ended up using 4)

10 Potions of Invisibility (though I only ended up using 5)

5 scrolls of Globe of Invulnerability (I only used 1, LOL)

10 Potions of Speed (I only used 2)

8 scrolls of Disintegrate ⭐

I will let you figure out what I did with those. 😁 (Unless you'd like to see my full strat, in which case I may post that later!)

Hope this helped anyone who's planning to attempt Honor Mode!! YOU'VE GOT THIS! 👏 Panic is the mindkiller in this version of the game, so just keep a level head, check your inventory before ending your turn, and read the BG3 Wiki (especially when facing bosses), haha - and you'll be a-okay 🥳🎆 !

Best of luck! 🍀✨

[hot-take-tournament]

HOT TAKE TOURNAMENT

PRE-PRELIMINARIES #31

Submission 309

Performative anger at any mention of Homestuck is obnoxious.

Yes. Discovering that something similar happened in a story is not valid grounds to start screeching. "WHAT THE FUCK IS HOMESTUCK," you shriek? It's a webcomic. It's free. Either read it and find out or move on. Also, it's not like weird or absurd shit doesn't happen in other things. Team Fortress 2 is about two stupid and virtually immortal brothers trying to steal each other's completely worthless land. Abraham Lincoln was hired by one of them as a mercenary. Warframe has a precognitive tower made of meat. The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy series reveals that the galaxy is secretly ruled by a man with no concept of object permanence that lives in a cabin with a cat.

this feels like a shot because i also didn't believe homestuck was real for the longest time

Pre-preliminaries will be used to determine what qualifies as a hot take. Propaganda is encouraged!

Also, remember to reblog your favourite polls for exposure! (exposure like when your exposed to the fact that the KISS Scooby Doo crossover does actually exist, scarring you for life)

[thenamesblurrito]

another set of Aventuri mecha! populating this planet slowly but surely

Trionic is utterly unremarkable at first glance. he has no inclusions, scoured from forging. he has no outlier ability, and is in fact completely dull, being susceptible to heat and cold and weakness like very few Aventuri are. for anyone else, this would earn pity or scorn. for Trionic, it earns respect. he is one of the oldest citizens of Divinex, a member of Exosphere's original crew and a survivor of the crash. nowadays he's considered wise, gracious, and a voice of reason among some of the more complicated dynamics of the Divinexi High Court, despite not holding a seat himself. in reality, he was a simple cabin bot before the crash and scrambled to fake it til he makes it as a mentor to a newborn civilization. without anyone older and wiser around, he resorted to trying to imitate what he remembered of Alpha Trion. clearly something paid off, for he's been a good--if secretly frazzled--influence on Divinexi society for generations

Alpenglow has been trying to ignore her discontent with her peers among Valian high society for decades now. it started with a raid, scores of alien ships targeting eastern Nova Spectra. all her life, Alpenglow had been taught Valian ideals of protection, duty, and glory in war. she expected her city-state to act in defense of their neighbors, for the raid was well within reach of Valian's militia, and yet the Prefecture did nothing. as a travel guide and manager of border routes, she saw firsthand what the Spectral refugees suffered as they fled to Valian territory, and as a noblemech she saw firsthand the pity and apathy of her peers. her powerful pyrokinetic ability and important role keeping the airways clear as a flightframe means her social status is all but guaranteed, and her polite but distant attitude combined with her pretty colors and colorchanging alexandrite inclusions makes her alluringly mysterious. and yet, her discontent grows, slowly but surely...

Longlight is a right tough old chap. he's sturdy, clever, quick on his feet, and has a mean right hook. he's also a perfect gentlemech, charming and upright, with many stories of his escapades in the wilds of the Crucible Crests in eastern Valius. right now he's a member of the militia of Fortress Vitus. he has a more relaxed attitude towards the concept of chain of command than the local guard would like, but no one can deny that when he goes haring off after a criminal or a threat, he certainly gets the job done. he is most effective when working with his partner Scopeseeker. the two of them make a deadly sniper team, with Longlight using his blindingly bright outlier power of blazing biolights to pinpoint targets for her with laser precision, or light up the eternal night with more lumens than the sun. even his clear gypsum inclusions refract light in sheets, and everybody can see his roadster alt mode driving down the street from miles away

Scopeseeker is the moon to Longlight's sun. she's quiet, focused, and deliberate, easily fading into the background while he steals attention. she's durable but has no other outlier ability, even though the terrifying precision of her shooting is sometimes considered a power. she used to be a tracker before the militia recruited her, and the isolation of the icy wilds has always suited her better. Longlight is really the only other person in Fortress Vitus she gets along with, despite their differences. her subtle, solid brown diamond inclusions suit her subtle, solid personality quite well. in root mode, she makes a fantastic sniper, especially with her partner's help, but in tankette mode she's nearly unstoppable. it isn't often she has to put her skills to use, but the Valian militia are always reminded of her value when she does

[tgrailwar-zero]

Since going to the Nameless City, which apparently is at the center of the map we're going to be fighting in, is out of the question, we can try to help by finding either Alter Ego or data for the seventh servant.

Can Mooncancer show us a map so we can start deciding which place to scout after the checkup?

"We can discuss that later. I don't want to overwhelm you with information. Foreigner, Pretender, let's get some rest and regather for proper planning. I'll see if I can help Avenger."

MOONCANCER replied, before taking AVENGER by the hand and gently leading him out of the room. He found himself being pulled along, not putting up much resistance, and the other two Servants didn't seem to have an issue with that command.

They stepped away as MOONCANCER led you both down a quaint, yet fortified hallway. It seemed to be well-protected, but not at the expense of making it seem like a prison or a war-torn fortress.

"The Azure Citadel is one of the two major strongholds during this Grail War. The Red Team has their own base of operations, and the Nameless City serves as an intermittent point between them, surrounded by other zones and territories. We can get into that later, however."

She happily explained, before eventually, leading AVENGER to a room.

The room was dark and dour, a lone piano resting within it. She looked around, before glancing back over her shoulder to AVENGER.

"Our chambers are partially influenced by our desires. It seems as if this is the one your heart calls out for. How interesting."

She mused, guiding AVENGER down to the one cushioned seat in the room, next to a window where light seeped in.

"Close your eyes, please. Take a deep breath, and exhale."

There was a moment of hesitation, but no real reason not to comply.

Even without looking, AVENGER could tell she was close, the sound of her breathing, the way her mana stayed at a controlled rhythm, and then eventually the way the palm of her hand rested on the forehead of his armor.

"Now, if you would relax."

[somnolent-scout]

I think TF2CC has run it's course.

Today I received the fourth rejection letter from one of the major conventions we've been attending for the past two years. First it was PAX West, then it was Rose City Comic Con, followed by the Seattle Parks thing, and now finally we were rejected by Salt Lake City FanX.

There's just not enough interest in Team Fortress 2 at conventions. Regardless of what we promote or show to investors and convention managers, they simply don't care for a video game from 2007.

Perhaps the future of TF2CC will just be an online community to allow people to share their ideas, their cosplays, prop making skills, and more. Maybe one day I'll release a guide on how to organize cosplay meetups like I used to do.

But for now? I think I'm done. I'm going to be focusing my efforts on my small business Beebo's. The convention scene just isn't really welcoming me back anymore. Maybe I'll come back to ECCC and the Washington State Cons. I'll probably go back to Phoenix for Fan Fusion again. But for now.. I think the TF2CC has reached the end of it's time in the spotlight.

Thank you guys for the fun we've had.

Goodnight.

[red-rose-corner]

Sonic Delta: Origins

Opal the Cat was born to Alex and Pearl in Floral Forest Village. As the Rabbit family resided there, she knew Cream and Cheese. A Chao Garden was in her old home, so she was raised around them. This is where her fondness for Chao came from.

Being homeschooled, she didn't have too many friends growing up. She knew Cream but met Perci and Zooey by chance one day. They became her first friends in the village. Charlie and Belinda were also kind to her. Dave had a one-sided crush on her.

One day, Cream received an invitation to Sonic's birthday party. The invitation went to Opal by accident. She got the invitation to Cream but was persuaded to join her in the festivities. With some persuading, Opal came along and was introduced to many of Sonic's friends. One of the Chao that attended the party took a shine to Opal.

No one knew why she got sucked in by the Time Eater that day. It may have been because he foretold her becoming a friend of Sonic. She ended up in Shadow's White Space instead of where Sonic and his friends were. The Chao that was smitten with her was also there.

Opal becomes a guide of sorts to Shadow during their time together. Eventually, she and Shadow make it to where Sonic is and cheer him on during the final battle. At the end of the party, the Chao accompanies Opal permanently. She names her Flora.

Opal returns home and resumes her quiet days with her new friend. Alex and Pearl realize it's time for her to leave the nest, for she is sixteen. Those days come tumbling down when Eggman launches a full-scale attack on her home.

Opal, Flora, and her Mom were able to get to safety. Alex died protecting civilians from Eggman's robot troops. Opal was slightly closer to her father than her mother. The news nearly broke her psyche. Combined with her friends reported missing, it left her struggling to function. Flora became a Service Chao to help her.

She signs up for the Freedom Fighters, but her self-doubt starts to get to her, and she considers quitting. On her first run, she proved vital in taking down an air fortress Emperor Robotnik had launched. From there, she starts working up the ranks to become second-in-command. This was critical because Knuckles led the Freedom Fighters at the time.

Through a chance encounter with Sonic, she turned the tide of the War to Take Back Mobius along with him. It came at the cost of Sonic overexerting himself during the final battle, and he fell comatose. The Freedom Fighters disbanded, and the younger Sonic returned to his time.

When robot raids occurred during clean-up, the initial Freedom Fighter group was reformed into two teams. Team Freedom defended Sunset City while Team Fighters worked to locate the source of the raids and inspire the people of Mobius to protect themselves. Neo Metal Sonic was ultimately stopped and Eggman was revealed to be alive and up to no good.

Thanks to Opal, Clove and Cassia defected from the Eggman Empire. At the same time, Sonic awoke from his coma and managed to fully recover. The Restoration was formed. Tekno was hired as part of R&D. Opal moved to Spiral Hill Village to live closer to her new friends, Tangle and Whisper.

During Dr. Eggman's rebuilding of his Empire, she met Mina Mongoose, who was going through some turmoil with her boyfriend, Ash. Opal fell for her, but they didn't enter a relationship until Surge and Kitsunami went on the loose.

After Dr. Starline was fired for going off script too many times, the platypus attempted to attack a concert Mina held with the Lemniscate band. Opal was assigned as a bodyguard by Xavier. She was given Nicole to help her out. At the time, Mina and Ash were no longer an item. Opal was able to drive off Surge and Kit but got injured in the process. While recovering, Mina confessed to Opal and they met Honey.

These days, Opal leads the Diamond Cutters. She shares a close friendship with Cosmo and a romantic relationship with Mina. Opal has gained more confidence and a positive outlook. Opal also works with Blaze and Silver as part of Team Crystal.

[meiliarotten]

Team Fortress 2 Kinktober Time Two: Electric Boogaloo

Day 21: Improvise, Adapt, Overcome (Frottage)

🔞MINORS DNI🔞

Pairings: Heavy x Male!Reader

Summary: Sometimes a difference in size requires one to get creative.

Tags: Frottage, outercourse, oral, size difference, grinding, aftercare

Word Count: 3.1k

The Masterlist

“You would not be able to handle it.”

You stood perfectly still, taken aback by Heavy’s response. You had prepared yourself for a whole myriad of reactions when you finally worked up the courage to invite him back to your room. However, the blunt statement that you ‘couldn’t handle him,’ was not one of them. It was just so deadpan, so matter-of-fact, and he said it with such confidence that you almost wondered if he had said this to other potential lovers in the past. Technically, it wasn’t an outright rejection, and the implications of what he had said only intrigued you more.

“If you don’t want this you can just come out and say it. You don’t have to try to scare me off with some cryptic warning,” you said, finally regaining some composure and trying your best not to sound too wounded.

“Нет, I am being honest.” He gave a nervous chuckle, a noise that sounded entirely foreign coming from the confident and clamorous man you imagined him to be based on what you had seen on the battlefield. “I want this,” he motioned towards you. “But you would break.”

“What, do you have a bit of a sadistic side?” you asked. Honestly, it wouldn’t surprise you, let alone deter you. However, the large man shook his head, immediately dashing the multitude of fantasies birthed from that possibility.

Heavy laughed again, as if it was his default reaction to nervousness. “It is simpler than that.” He looked you over with a sigh. “You are very small.”

“So? Everything is small to you, you’re fucking massive-” You stopped in your tracks, eyes going wide. What he was trying to imply finally dawned on you. Whether it was embarrassment, a language barrier, or even just an attempt to be delicate that kept Heavy from outright saying that he thought his dick was too large for you, you didn’t know.

When you finally worked up the nerve to look him in the eyes, he simply gave a solemn nod, confirming that you had indeed connected the dots accurately. Still, a little voice in the back of your head reminded you that you still hadn’t been rejected. In fact, you were emboldened by the fact that Heavy had outright admitted that he did want you. So, with a smirk, you continued, albeit a bit more cautiously.

“I’m not a weak willed man, Heavy.” Your words earned yet another laugh, and you knew the heat in your cheeks was turning your skin a bright shade of red. “I mean it! I want to try, and I think you do too.”

Heavy took a deep breath, his face going serious. For a moment, you thought you were finally going to be dismissed, but what you got proved to be the exact opposite. “You will say if it hurts.” His tone made it clear that this wasn’t a request, but a necessity. You nodded, taking a few steps closer to him. “You will say if you need to stop.” He was guiding you to the bed now, an arm wrapped around your back. It seemed you would be staying in his quarters, his bed being larger and more comfortable. “You understand?”

You were giddy with anticipation, but that didn’t mean you hadn’t clung into every word. You were in the bed now, looking up at him from where you were seated on the mattress. “I understand, Heavy,” you said. It was only then that he joined you, climbing onto the bed next to you and pulling you into his lap with ease. Your heart raced and it took you a few moments to do the obvious, leaning forward to close the distance between the two of you. That first kiss was quick, almost chaste as you parted moments later with a sigh and a sultry whisper. “I want you.”

One hand came up to cradle the back of your head as you pressed your lips against him again, trying to trail down further along his jaw and neck. Heavy seemed to have other plans however, taking your chin and tilting you back up to his mouth, encouraging you to slow down, to savor this. Going slow would become not only a luxury, but a necessity if he really was as large as he claimed. That said, you still couldn’t resist the urge to squirm in his lap to take the edge off, which eventually turned into outright grinding against each other while still clothed. You moaned, letting Heavy deepen the kiss as he took the opportunity to slip his tongue into your mouth.

Your confidence began to waver when Heavy suddenly bucked up against you. His cock was straining against the fabric of his pants, and even while still in its confines you could tell that you may have underestimated the challenge you had undertaken. You tried to take solace in the slow pace, in the way Heavy worked his lips against yours, letting yourself believe that your nerves were simply getting the better of you, but a nagging little voice told you that you had to be sure.

You pulled away with a gasp, not realizing how long you had gone without parting for air. You ran your hands down his chest, feeling it rise and fall beneath your palms before you were tugging at his belt, unfastening it with far less finesse than you were going for. Every movement felt clumsy and awkward, making your face burn as you tossed the belt aside, unbuttoned his trousers and finally freed his cock.

Oh fuck.

You had promised yourself that you wouldn’t stare, that you would maintain some semblance of dignity at the very least. Still, you couldn’t help but be captivated by the sight. “Oh, wow. That’s…” you trailed off, floundering with your words until Heavy mercifully finished your sentence for you.

“Large?” he said. You managed to tear your gaze away to look up at him, being met with a smug expression that could only be translated as ‘I told you so.’ The worst part was, he was right.

You knew Heavy would be big. Even if he hadn’t warned you, the man was essentially a giant, especially compared to you, so you could have inferred as much. Yet the reality of seeing him hard and flushed for you was beyond anything you had imagined. Shaking your head, you pushed your concerns aside, at least for now. After all, there were other ways to pleasure someone.

“I was going to say impressive!” You lied through your teeth, reaching forward to grasp Heavy’s cock. Once again your confidence wavered as you noticed that your hand could barely wrap around him. Still, you continued, stroking Heavy firmly, listening to the soft groan he tried to choke back. “Very impressive,” you whispered again, mostly to yourself.

After eliciting a few more groans your confidence began to renew itself. You let yourself go faster, and even get a bit rough at times. Then again, for Heavy, what you considered rough probably wasn’t much more bothersome than a fly. On the other hand, you got plenty of time to get up close and personal with what you would be dealing with later, and it quickly became apparent that he wasn’t yet completely hard when you first unfastened his belt.

“You are shaking,” Heavy said, distracting you from your musings. There was a hint of concern in his voice. At first you were confused, but a quick glance at your hand showed it to be true. You hadn’t even noticed until Heavy pointed it out, but your hands were trembling and a perpetual shiver had overtaken your body, leaving goosebumps over your skin and a nervous chill running up your spine.

“It’s probably just anticipation,” you said, only to find that even your voice was beginning to shake. It wasn’t entirely a lie, there was definitely some anticipation in what you were feeling, but anxiety was certainly the more dominant emotion. You stroked him faster, quickly distracting Heavy from any further concerns he may have had. The low groan and the way his length throbbed under your touch was quite rewarding, and you managed to regain some confidence. “That feels good, doesn’t it? I’m good with more than just my hands.”

You were quick to demonstrate just that, leaning down to take Heavy into your mouth as deep as you could, stopping just short of gagging. Using your hands to stroke whatever you couldn’t take in, you set to work, bobbing your head while Heavy moaned and gripped the sheets hard, relishing the feeling of your hot mouth on his cock. He was exercising a remarkable amount of self control, not daring to buck up into your throat. You were especially thankful for that. While you may have been able to eventually work Heavy past your gag reflex with enough time and patience, you knew that if he were to outright facefuck you, it would probably be a far less pleasant experience.

You probably wouldn't be able to get Heavy to treat you that roughly even if you asked though. He had been shockingly gentle with you throughout this. Considering he had tried to scare you away at first, you would have expected something a bit more intense. Perhaps you wouldn’t have minded that, as you realized that Heavy could probably manhandle you with ease if he wanted to.

The very thought made you moan around him, feeling yourself grow achingly hard at the thought of that even as you tried to focus on your current task. You licked up the shaft, teasing the larger man before plunging him into your mouth once again, not letting the taste of precum on your tongue bother you one bit. You were so focused that you may have just sucked Heavy to completion then and there if he hadn’t taken you by the hair, gently tugging until you had been pulled off of his cock with a soft whine.

“Your turn,” Heavy said, moving to undress you. His fingers tugging at the waistband of your pants. He was still so gentle, as if worried that the smallest wrong move would hurt you. When he finally managed to unfasten the buttons and zipper, you knew you had to admit defeat.

“Heavy, I…” you stammered. Heavy immediately stopped, looking up at you, waiting patiently for you to continue. You gave him an apologetic look. “I don’t know if I can take it.”

You knew your skin was flushed. You could feel the heat in your cheeks and you avoided looking him in the eye, embarrassed at how in over your head you were. You opened your mouth to apologize when you felt Heavy’s hand on your cheek, caressing softly as he turned your gaze back to him.

“There are other ways,” Heavy said. “If you still want this.”

“I do,” you said, leaning into his touch.

“Come, sit here.” You were pulled into Heavy’s lap again, one arm hooked around your back. Before you could ask what the plan was you were cut off with a gasp, feeling Heavy take hold of your cock and begin to stroke. His hands were so large, practically engulfing you. You cursed softly, instinctively trying to thrust up into his fist only to be held still. “Нет, do not move yet. Let Heavy take care of you.”

You tilted your head, a little confused. Then again, you certainly weren’t opposed to the idea of being taken care of. So you let yourself be pampered, resting your head on Heavy’s chest as he began to pump your cock faster. You moaned, grasping his shirt in your fists, bracing yourself against him. For now, he was your rock to cling to.

“Heavy! Oh god, Mikhail!” You felt him shudder slightly at the use of his real name, and for a moment you were worried you had crossed a line. However, a quick glance up at his face proved otherwise. For the first time, you had managed to make Heavy blush. Still, he met your gaze with a calm smile.

“You make pretty sounds.” It was a simple statement, one that made your heart skip a beat. You hadn’t even realized how shameless you had become with your moans. Either you had stopped caring the moment Heavy started touching you or you had lost the ability to even try to stifle yourself. Whatever the reason for your lack of volume control, you could at least take pride in the fact that Heavy enjoyed your reactions. Still, you couldn’t help but feel that you were being far too passive.

“Wait, it’s not fair that you- fuck!” You stammered between moans, trying futilely to string your words together coherently. You placed your hand on Heavy’s, making him pause and allowing you to finally speak. “I want you to feel good too.”

Heavy opened his mouth as if to speak, and if he was about to protest, you didn’t give him the chance to, catching him off guard with a heated kiss. You managed to take control for a time, feeling him release your cock. You nearly melted at the feeling of his arms wrapping around your waist, holding you firmly against him, but you couldn’t let yourself lose focus yet.

You could feel him against you, the need he was denying. He was still slick with spit from earlier. With a soft sigh, you began to move your hips against him like before, feeling your own cock press against his as you bucked forward, sliding against his length.

Heavy gasped and you leaned back, clutching onto his shoulders for some sort of leverage as your hips canted, grinding against him and relishing the moments when you were able to get some soft noise of pleasure from the surprisingly reserved man. Given how he was in battle, you would have expected Heavy to be louder, but so far he had managed to truly defy all your expectations.

He let you buck against him for a while before pushing back, and for a moment you were afraid you had done something wrong. Those thoughts were quickly put to bed when he proceeded to wrap his massive hand around both your cock and his own. A harsh gasp escaped you as Heavy pumped the two of you in unison, his breaths growing ragged and uneven. It was even more evident when he spoke, his voice low and gravelly. “Feels good, да?”

After a few moments of trying and failing to respond with any coherent words, you gave up and simply nodded with a dazed moan. You barely saw the satisfied smile Heavy gave you, enjoying the sight of you shuddering in delight, resisting the urge to buck into his fist. It was clear that you had completely forgotten about the slight hiccup in your original plans. So what if you couldn’t take him? This unique sensation was even better than what you had originally hoped for, so new and deliciously pleasurable for the both of you.

You threw your head back when Heavy picked up the pace, letting out breathy, pant-like moans as precum began to bead at the tip of your cock. “Whole base will hear you,” Heavy warned, although by the way his breath hitched, you had a feeling he didn’t really care. You didn’t care either. You were far too close to give a shit about who heard you screaming in ecstasy. It felt like you could come undone at any moment, muscles spasming and trembling as you frantically chased that high until the sensation of Heavy’s thumb running over the sensitive head of your cock finally brought you over the edge.

Heavy stroked you in long, languid motions as you rode out your climax, letting your release spill over his knuckles, slickening his touch. You were bucking against him now, having fully lost the will to keep from moving, and the feeling of you thrusting against him coupled with the ministrations of his own hand was what made him come undone not long after you. He was surprisingly reserved, his climax signaled with only a low moan, his hand going still only after you began to whimper from overstimulation.

Almost immediately you collapsed, landing on the plush pillows with a thud and a groan. You were spent, and you couldn’t even bring yourself to be embarrassed about it, the afterglow leaving you in an unwavering state of euphoria. Your eyes shut and you were immobile, boneless in a way that would usually leave you feeling vulnerable, but you knew there was nothing to fear. You weren’t sure how long the silence had stretched for when you finally spoke.

“Fuck, that was really good,” you muttered, not even caring about how cliché it sounded. You didn’t get a response, and you opened your eyes to find that Heavy had left the bed, cleaning himself up and retrieving one of the water bottles that were distributed among the mercs. When he was back at your side he lifted you upright, pressing the cool bottle into your still shaky hands.

You barely managed to get the cap off as Heavy gently encouraged you to drink. You smiled to yourself, enjoying the feeling of being cared for. “Thank you, Misha,” you said after taking a long drink from the bottle, nearly downing half of it once you realized how thirsty you were. He made a soft sound of acknowledgement as he began to clean you up to the best of his ability, letting you relax comfortably once you placed the bottle on the nightstand and collapsed back onto the bed.

It didn’t occur to you in the moment that with you splayed out on the mattress, Heavy couldn’t exactly fit next to you. However that problem was solved with little effort when he simply maneuvered your aching body for himself, making you gasp as you were essentially placed on top of him, draped over his immense body.

“Is this comfortable for you?” you asked, raising your head as much as your energy sapped body would allow you to. “I mean, I’m literally about to fall asleep on top of you.”

“This is fine,” he said with a smirk, seeming to find the very idea that you could make him uncomfortable to be humorous. “You are like a…” he thought for a while, searching for the right term, before his eyes lit up. “Weighted blanket! Very comfortable.” He draped an arm over your back, keeping you securely pressed against him as if to emphasize his point.

You chuckled softly, finding yourself at peace with that explanation and letting yourself relax, feeling the gentle rise and fall of Heavy’s breathing under your head. If you listened closely enough you could probably make out the steady beat of the ubercharge heart, a staccato rhythm that lulled you to sleep within moments.

[buildacatboy]

all of these pussy destroying tf2 fanart ur rbing is tempting us to join this fandom... should i?

um um ^_^ a lot of the art i rb'd last night was from a fan made film using TF2 characters called Emesis Blue!

if you guys wanna get into team fortress two, then PLEASE JOIN! But if it's just Emesis Blue, here's your guide:

First and foremost, watch their trailer first. I would recommend watching all of this at night, in the dark, just to scare the shit out of yourself.

https://youtu.be/Qzqa527mVx8

Not the best, but it gives you information on what ends up being really important in the film? Its not analog horror, only this trailer is, so don't worry about that.

Onto the movie.

https://youtu.be/V0ODG8bFme0

Great stuff. No further comment.

I'm going to immediately follow it up with the review I watched, because it explains a LOT OF SHIT that even I didn't catch because a lot of it has to do with media as old as my PARENTS, if not older, since it almost seems like it's trying to be historically accurate sometimes with how it lines shit up:

https://youtu.be/DDlstyGd9kg

That should help you get into it if you wanted to try it out my brother . Godspeed

[oneeyedcharactercompetition]

Prelim Updates & Character List!

First, competing as a team won for all four prelim polls! Everybody's in, together! (For some reason I had a feeling the Naruto poll was a wild question, and with my practically non-existent knowledge figured Kakashi would win, but glad it's funnier this way lol)

Second, I have still neglected to organize the Portal prelims. Whoops. I'll probably figure that out today and post that tomorrow evening (5/1). Relatedly, I also realized I missed one more non-Portal prelim poll, so that'll go up at the same time (it's for Percy Jackson).

Third, uhh you guys probably want the character list huh. Don't know why I didn't do that in my original form is closed update. Here you go!

(One asterisk means they'll be on a team, two for the prelim I missed. Portal/etc will be at the bottom.)

Allison Ruth (Kill Six Billion Demons)

Annie (Skullgirls)

Asuka Langley Soryu (Neon Genesis Evangelion)

B.O.B (Monster Vs. Aliens)

Bazooka Joe (Bazooka Joe)

Breakdown (Transformers)

Brightheart (Warrior Cats)

Buck the Weasel (Ice Age)

Captain Hook (Peter Pan)

Captain Typho (Star Wars)

Catherine Foundling (A Practical Guide to Evil)

Celia (Monsters Inc)*

Chevalier (Worm)

Dark Choco Cookie (Cookie Run)

Demoman (Team Fortress 2)

Dimitri Alexandre Blaiddyd (Fire Emblem: Three Houses)

Docm77 (Hermitcraft)

Dusclops (Pokemon)*

Dusknoir (Pokemon)*

Duskull (Pokemon)*

Ethan Nakamura (Percy Jackson & The Olympians)**

Every Dalek (Doctor Who)

Fuyuhiko Kuzuryuu (Danganronpa)

Garrett (Thief)

Glenn Close (Dungeons & Daddies)

Hero's Shade (Legend of Zelda: Twilight Princess)

Himeno (Chainsaw Man)

Hua Cheng (Tian Guan Ci Fu)

Hudson (Gargoyles)

Hyakunosuke Ogata (Golden Kamuy)

Iris Clops (Monster High)

Iron Bull (Dragon Age: Inquisition)

Jack (Minecraft story mode)

John Silver (Treasure Planet)

Juno Steel (The Penumbra Podcast)

Kakashi Hatake (Naruto)*

Kaname Date (AI: The Somnuim Files)*

Kubo (Kubo & the Two Strings)

Kuruto Ryuki (AI: The Somnium Files)*

Laura Kearney (The Quarry)

Lila Bard (Shades of Magic trilogy)

Magnus Hammersmith I (Metalocalypse)

Man-at Arms (Darkest Dungeon)

Marie Mjolner (Soul Eater)

Merle Highchurch (The Adventure Zone - Balance)

Mike Wazowski (Monsters Inc)*

Midari Ikishima (Kakegurui)

Mizuki Date (AI: The Somnium Files)

Mr. Fischoeder (Bob's Burgers)

Nick Fury (Marvel)

Nifty (Hazbin Hotel)

Obito Uchiha (Naruto Shippuden)*

Odin (Norse mythology)

Pibby (Pibby)

Plankton (SpongeBob SquarePants)

Prismo (Adventure Time)

Qifrey (Witch Hat Atelier)

Rachel Duncan (Orphan Black)

Rae Morningstar (Fable SMP)

Red Beard (Asterix)

Redcloak (Order of the Stick)*

Rem (Death Note)

Right-Eye (Order of the Stick)*

Rose Copen (Y: The Last Man)

Rose Wilson (DC Comics)

Roy Mustang (Fullmetal Alchemist)

Sigma Klim (Zero Escape)

Spike Spiegel (Cowboy Bebop)

Tengen Uzui (Demon Slayer/Kimestu no Yaiba)

The One-Eyed, One-Horned, Flying Purple People Eater (song by Sheb Wooley)

The Virtual Reality Assistance & Education Core (SteamVR opening tutorial)

Tyson (Percy Jackson & The Olympians)**

Viktor Vasko (Lackadaisy)

Violet (The Walking Dead (S4 Game))

Vriska Serket (Homestuck)

Wolf O'Donnell (Star Fox)

Xander Harris (Buffy the Vampire Slayer)

Zuko (Avatar The Last Airbender)

Portal/Portal adjacent:

Alan (Aperture Hand Labs)

Anger Core

Atlas

Bill (Aperture Hand Labs)

Cake Core

Curiosity Core

Deceptive Devin (Aperture Hand Labs)

Defective Turret

Fact Core

Friendly Frank (Aperture Hand Labs)

GLaDOS

Grady (Aperture Desk Job)

Morality Core

P-body

Party Escort Bot (Portal/Lab Rat)

Rick the Adventure Core

Space Core

Turret

Wheatley

[geraniumbonbon]

Shitty guide to engineer tf2 copypasta stolen by iju (formally xeddd)

I'm gon cry. Dell Conagher is the human embodiment of beauty. i don’t care if he’s real or not. he’s gorgeous just the way he is. i mean, just look at that smile of his. they’re so adorable, oh so adorable. this shit is not okay. he is literally the most gorgeous man alive. he is cute and adorable, but at the same time hot and sexy that it makes everyone want to simultaneously want to nut. he is always glowing. like you won’t be able to be in a dark room with this guy cause he is just going to blow up and shine bright like a damn sun. he is that precious.

everytime i see him, my crops start flourishing, my grades get better, my skin is healed, my room is cleaned, and humanity and world peace is solved. he is cute as fuck and deserves the entire universe. look at this piece of shit. it makes me want to kill him i hate him so much because he is that beautiful.

have you ever been so in love with a man like engineer team fortress two because i have and i have no regrets. there are no words to describe how perfect he is. words can’t do his cute and fluffy justice. he is an actual work of art. he should work and belong in the world famous museum of art. ya boi actually thinks this man is just fake because there is literally no more perfection than this piece of shit here.

my baby boy. what did we do to deserve this beautiful and gorgeous son. just look at him, oh valve what shall we do? bless valve and this work of art right here. you won’t even be able to put his by a sun because he will just shine brighter than anything in the whole galaxy and universe. i could just go on all day and write a 99-page essay on how beautiful this man is. i really think

Source: (Start at 2:03)

[rito-flips]

A short introduction to balisongs

Balisongs. You might know them as butterfly knives. Kickass, The Punisher, Team Fortress 2—there's a chance you've seen them in some form of media.

An entire community exists around this type of knife, but with its illegality in many parts of the world, some people without a functioning brain might try to convince you that this community is filled with hoodlums preying on unsuspecting people with these knives.

But nothing could be farther from the truth. In fact, most of this community sees the balisong not as a weapon, but as a skill toy and flow art somewhat similar to yoyo and kendama.

I'm a part of this community, and I want to introduce you to the basics of balisongs and the community around them. There's so much to unpack that it isn't even funny, so how about the parts of the balisong and how to get started?

Let's start with the clip above. I'm clearly using an actual knife, so how am I avoiding getting cut? The answer is that I have an understanding of the different parts of the knife.

As shown above, the balisong can be broken up into three different parts: - The blade - The bite handle - The safe handle

The blade is, well... the blade. I don't know what else to say about it. Generally speaking, every balisong trick under the sun exists under the understanding that there's one side that will cut you, or the bite side, and one side that won't, or the safe side. The handle on the bite side is called the bite handle, and the handle on the safe side is called the safe handle.

Balisongs themselves can be broken down into two categories: trainers and live blades. - A trainer has a fake "blade" that lets you practice flipping as much as you want without having to risk injuring yourself. Generally accessible in most parts of the world, and much less likely to get confiscated by customs. - A live blade is the real thing with a real blade, through and through. Flipping a live blade has an inherent risk of injury since it can Stab™, but unless you're stupid any cuts you do get from it won't be that bad. Live blades aren't exactly legal everywhere, so remember to check your local knife laws if you're thinking about buying a live blade.

Although I recommend you start on a trainer, whether you buy a trainer or live blade first is entirely up to you. Just remember that if you buy a live blade, you'll have to take extra precautions to avoid any serious injury.

Okay, so with all that out of the way...

Where you do buy a balisong? And who even makes them?

If you're 100% serious about wanting to get into this hobby, it's best not to waste your time with most of the trainers you can find on Amazon, with one exception: the Nabalis Vulp, which is a good enough flipper and will have everything you need to get started flipping.

I know the price seems a bit steep for what it is at $65 USD, but bear with me because this hobby can get very expensive for reasons too technical for a post like this. Once you feel like you want to upgrade from the Vulp, here are some knives and trainers I can recommend at varying price points: - LDY Orion ($75 USD/$85 USD for the live blade) - Machinewise Prysma Pro ($185 USD) - Squid Industries Krake Raken ($250 USD)

Some big(ger) makers on the scene right now are Squid Industries, Machinewise, Glidr, Nabalis, BRS, Fellowship Blades, Zippy Balisong, and Jerry Hom. And as for content creators, my personal favorites are Will Hirsch, Blade Bias, and Disuko, with Big Flips providing all of the tutorials you need to get started. This is a very niche hobby, so a lot of major figures in the community are approachable and open to questions you may have on things like Reddit and Instagram, but as with any other person you meet, do remember to treat them with some level of respect.

If you wanna see just short of everything that's on the market right now, I recommend checking out BuffaloDIngus's guide on balisongs, which also goes a lot more in-depth than I can with this style of content.

I hope you give my hobby a try, and happy flipping!