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#that's the only reason I can get away with this shit and also have opinions on how magic works lol
medicinemane · 5 months
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#I get tired of people trying to explain what lens I should view the world through; what way I could think that would make everything better#forgive me but I don't care; I do what I do and I do what I can and you don't see the work I do under the hood#I don't want advice on self validation or whatever; I want... I want someone to hold a mirror up so I can actually see myself#by which I mean I want input on how I'm doing; if it's good enough; if it's worth anything; if anything I make is good#everyone things I'm nice; everyone has always thought I'm nice#but given nice leaves me profoundly isolated I don't think I care#not to mention in my opinion what nice in this instance means is that I'm capable of listening#it's mostly that I have manners rather than some quality about me#I'm well behaved and polite and can listen; and that's perceived as nice or even sweet#and it's not like I'm offended by people seeing me that way; but maybe you can get why... I can't do anything with that information#but if I'm doing enough... if I provide any value to the world... I might have heard that less times in my life than years I've lived#that's where I'm totally blind#people don't tend to offer any input; and also people don't tend to let me know what they're thinking#and I in fact am not a mind reader; I can often accurately infer things; but no of that means a thing till it's confirmed#and... well... hopefully no one reads the stupid shit I say and especially not the tags so this is safe and hidden#but truthfully people just like to hear that stuff they're doing is wanted and matters#and I do not#I don't know... gotta go do more cleaning cause I need to#and I have no idea if... I've got a reason for fighting so hard to clean; but I get very little input so... I expect... well...#and thankfully I don't think they read my tags so I can say this#but I really expect they won't take me up on my offer to come out here and get away from their parents; so there will be no pay off#not that I blame them in the slightest... it's just the only possible pay off for this cleaning would be helping someone I like out#and a scrap of company#but then again... in many ways anyone coming out to live with me is the worst thing they could probably do#sorry... I have a rather bleak outlook on many things surrounding myself purely cause of what I infer from the past#there is never pay off; only more shit I need to get done#I will never be loved; I will never be wanted; I will always just kinda be an afterthought that's occasionally worth venting to#no one will ever be particularly interested in anything I'm interested while I'll chase their interests or at least try to#certainly let them talk about them when they want#...though I take that over my normal total isolation... better to at least be permitted to follow in someone's shadow than have nothing
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narutomaki · 1 year
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I always get self conscious when people talk about the amount of thought the goes/went into their art because there is.
there is no upper processing happening when I'm designing a character or background. my hand starts moving and my brain shuts off. I recognize there was probably a point in my life where this WASN'T the case but. like. it's why my art is like. mostly flat and lifeless. my art is never intended to tell a story because when I intend to I get angry/frustrated to the point of wanting to break shit because it's not going right. and I've tried to tell stories with my art both comics and stand alone pieces and it all feels fake or flat or.
idk.
I've TRIED to start and finish a piece where I've made conscious choices beyond "does this look good/right" and "am I being offensive in ways I'm aware of with anything here" but it just. makes me want to scream.
I learned people told stories with their art and I tried to and I stopped drawing for 5 years despite having. before that point been doing art studies for 8 to 10 hours a day for. 2 years.
I mostly just think it's because I have nothing to. say.
I can't add anymore tags to this post??? homophobia.
any way this post is useless idk I'm just sad because people do this thing so easily and enjoy it when it makes me break down crying. I don't get it. every person I've known regardless of neurodivergency has been able to do this consciously to some degree and enjoy it and meanwhile my stupid ass is asked how/why i chose something and I just. shrug. idk
looked nice?
#idk i probably say a lot UNintentionally#but like.#idk i feel like im just being. like. whining. for no reason. like boo hoo no one cares grow up if art makes you thay mad just stop drawing#like. man i WANT to think i WANT to tell stories i intend to tell along with the things i dont pick up on but.#i also mean like. if someone looked at a piece they could pick it apart comprehensively. like#but its like. idk. im like. i think im just to stupid for it.#im the same way with media analysis to be fair. which isnt like great but like.#why did someone choose this lighting? i dont know they thought it looked good ?#i have gotten 90-100% on every single analysis and opinion piece i ever submitted in HS for English#the only time i DIDNT get over 89% on an opinipn piece is when i tried to articulate my actual feelings on a topic to go along w researc#THAT got me pulled aside and told what i had written about was inappropriate and that i should think twice#before submitting a paper with that kond of content in the future#ao i did :^) and went back to bullshitting every single thing!#the curtains were blue in this scene to indicate not sadness but instead her deep love for uhhh fuck. flips through reading material and#lands on a random page. her dog buddy who is depcited in chapter (x) seeing as buddy is usually a male dogs name we can extrapolate and say#she chose these curtain colours after his death to remind her of the dog she had lost ÷#end sentence end oaragraph submit paper withoit a secondary proof reading and lie and say i left the roigh draft at home. walk away#how did i get high grades. dude. like everyone says teachers know when a kids bullshitting but like#the teachers ATE MY SHIT UP 😑 i got used as an example of comprehensive stucture and analysis on more than one occasion#this is not me bragging this is me saying i never actually learned how to domthis stuff because i was supported in faking it#some people can do analysis like yhis on their first read through like. and remember it. how? how??? what???#whay do you mean its because you read mote than thee sparknotes and random chapters because the book didnt interest you.#'we know when you dont actually read the book?' why did you compliment me on my comprehensive opinons of the parts i didnt readm#'We know when you write it the night before?' why did you laude me as an example of dedication put into an essay when i fucked around every#single in class wotk session past the first one and frantically typed and printed that in the computer lab before class 20 minutes ago?#why!! like DUDE#its like when they say they can tell when you use wikipedia to soirce things and then lie about it#and then compliment ur sources when youbl just used wikipedias sources. witout reading them urself.#which i also did#and when they tell you not to just use google translate because they can tell. when i did and then edited a LITTLE to catch names.
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mistergreatbones · 5 months
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I am graduating in two weeks I will not engage in discourse. I am graduating in two week I need to focus on finals. My degrees will worth more than being right online. I will not engage in discourse. I will not engage. I will not.
But I want to 😟
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wilcze-kudly · 2 months
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People will go on about how "Katara's story is a tragedy" because she... ended up marrying the guy she loves, having children and grandchildren which she was always excited about and literally becoming a master waterbender and rising to the top of her field as a healer.
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Yes, Katara's story has tragic aspects to it. And there are certainly flaws in how she is written in tlok (Though I will argue that there are actually more issues with how Toph and Zuko are just plopped in there for no reason in later seasons). And her storylines aren't perfect, for example her resolving her trauma around the murder of her mother being more used to prop up Zuko than her own internal turmoil. (Most of TSR is from Zuko's perspective and I hate that actually)
"Katara's story is a tragedy" Why do you have such a hard on for this woman's misery? Let her be happy, man.
You know what gaang girlie's life is an actual onscreen tragedy?
Toph's!
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People will fucking downplay Toph's childhood abuse because she wasn't physically hurt, but her childhood was a never ending carousel of abelism, misogyny, neglect and isolation. The way Toph describes her parent's treatment of her as "pressure and pain" is heartbreaking.
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Toph's only escape was Earth Rumble and earthbending, but despite her skills, she remained the perfect little lady her parents always wanted her to be. She's never known a different life, and she was only able to be her real self in secret.
And when Toph finally opens up to her parents, when she finally lays her real self bare in front of the people who are supposed to love and care for her?
She is met with what may be, in my opinion, the cruellest rejection in the show.
Despite this, even when Toph runs away, she still cares for her parents' approval. Hell, she's even lured into a trap due to her getting a forged letter from her mom and getting excited because it looked like her mom was finally accepting her.
It's also important to note how determined to be self sufficient and to prove herself Toph is. We can especially see this right after she joins the Gaang, where she refuses to participate in splitting with the rest of the group, insisting on "pulling her own weight". This isn't Toph being a brat, or spoilt, this is her wanting to prove that she can handle herself because people have handled and understimated her her entire life.
Eventually, Toph starts to learn to trust the members of the Gaang and this is a step in the right direction. She's literally making friends for the first time in her life I'm so proud of her.
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However, I was genuinely upset when Toph's life changing field trip with Zuko didn't work out. When Toph was trying to connect with Zuko and he blew her off (I'm not blaming him tho they had shit to do), I couldn't help but remember the rejection Toph suffered from Lao.
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Post canon, Toph continues to try and prove herself, starting a metalbending school and training new metalbenders.
She also reconciles with her father. Not before Lao disowns he rmultiple times and calls her a rude, ungrateful thing. And while he eventually comes to understand Toph and cherish her, that type of trauma sticks with you.
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So it's no wonder really that Toph, someone who went her entire childhood seemingly without even speaking to someone her age, would have trouble forming connections. She has children with two different men, neither of which seem to stick around.
Toph tries to do right by her daughters and gives them the freedom she never got. Sadly, the pendulum swung too far to the other side, since it seems that she started to neglect her daughters, which led to them developing a sleugh of issues of their own.
Toph becomes the cheif of police, which kind of makes sense. Republic City was only slowly emerging as an actual metropolis. Toph took on a role as a protector, and probably as a way to prove herself. But as Republic City grew, Toph probably realised that she became something she hated. A cog in the machine, and started to despise her job.
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Searching for a semblance of the freedom and happiness her travels afforded her in her childhood, Toph leaves the city and takes up the life of a hermit in a swamp. She managed to fix her relationship with Suyin to some extent, but still seems reluctant or simply unable to connect with her daughter or grandchildren. Since she apparently hasn't seen Opal, a grown 20 year old woman since she was a little girl.
On the surface old Toph doesn't seem terribly dissimilar to young Toph, still tough and spunky. But she is more jaded, depressed and pessimistic. She comes out to save Suyin from immediate harm and manages to somewhat reconcile with Lin, but then she fucks right back off to the swamp where she seems to literally hide until Wu and Korra straight up force her to come with them.
Toph's story began with her alone and it seems to end with her alone as well. It's a story of a girl who grew up isolated and handled by others, and was woefully unprepared for the real world, which only jaded her further. She lives with the guilt of fucking up her daughters' lives and a belief in the pointlessness of life.
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Toph started off longing to experience the world and ended up willingly isolating herself from it.
If that isn't a tragedy, I'm not sure what is.
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Mind you, this is not the trauma olympics. I'm not saying that Toph has suffered more than Katara or that Katara's trauma is not as valid as Toph's. Katara and Toph's experiences are completely different, Katara being a victim of genocide and war, Toph being a victim of child abuse. I'm just saying that, objectively, Katara had a happier 'ending' than Toph.
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daistea · 4 months
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marriage hcs with mithrun and kabru? im a huge sucker for domestic stuff lol
Ya!!
2,500 words
Dungeon Meshi Spoilers ‼️❗️
no tw I don’t think
ₓ˚. ୭ ˚○◦˚.˚◦○˚ ୧ .˚ₓ
♡︎ Mithrun ♡︎
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Mithrun’s proposal isn’t big. He just slips the ring on your finger and tells you it’s happening.
He wouldn’t care what the wedding is like, just tell him where to be and when. Though if you insist on his opinion he’ll tell you that something simple would be most comfortable.
I wonder if there’s like a formal outfit for the Canaries… Or elven wedding garbs. Idk!
If you have a reception and you force him to dance, then you get to see Mithrun’s nobility training in effect! He can waltz!
He ends up throwing the bouquet because reasons but he just straight up launches it into Pattadol’s face.
Anyway, onto home life. Mithrun actually cleans a lot, just out of habit. So you don’t have a messy husband, yay!
But he doesn’t care much about decorating his surroundings. You’re the one who fixes up the house how you like it.
He teleports around the house but he’s very careful to always know where you are. He often sneaks up on you, not on purpose at first. After a while he starts sneaking up on you because your reactions are funny.
Every good couple finds ways to torment each other. It keeps the romance alive.
Mithrun puts his cold fingers and feet on you in bed. He does it with a straight face but you see the evil intent in his eye…
You reorganize on a regular basis, and sometimes move all the furniture two inches to the left. You do this when he’s gone and honestly he doesn’t notice until he starts running into things without explanation.
Mithrun is a very touchy person with you. And only with you. Nobody else.
He wraps his arms around you from behind a lot. He kisses your neck. He buries his face in your hair. And he’ll do it anywhere, this man does not care who sees.
People new to Melini hear about the fearsome, dangerous, cold Captain of the Canaries. And when they hear he has a spouse they’re like ??oh??
Then they see him cuddling you. His face is blank but he’s holding you tight, closing his eyes as he rests his head on yours. And they wonder if this is the fearsome guy they heard about.
Marriage looks good on Mithrun. He never thought he’d get married, ever. But he craves your company, he wants you around all the time, he wants every inch of your attention. Your affectionate smiles should be only for him. And he has no problem telling you that you’re his and your attention should be on him.
I mean, you’re one of the few desires he has. He’s going to soak up every bit of you, inject you in his bloodstream, graft you into the fabric of his soul. He’s not going to say that, but it’s true.
My guilty pleasure is making Mithrun into an obsessive partner, but that’s honestly just my headcanon/preference and not something I would insist is canon to his character.
Obsessive as in following you around like a lost puppy, always finding some way to touch you, overwhelming attraction, getting a bit irritable when you’re away, being very possessive, etc. But then again, that’s just my preference talking.
At night, he holds you like he thinks you’re about to disappear.
You cast sleep spells to help him rest at night or else he’ll be awake for hours and hours until his body gives out.
Mithrun likes being the little spoon, even if you’re smaller than him. But he also likes being the big spoon sometimes. #switch
You think cooking together will be sweet and fun, right? Wrong. It’s horrible. The first time you try to cook together you just keep bumping into each other, getting in the way, picking up things and setting them down somewhere and forgetting where that was. It gets a bit tense.
You don’t cook together again.
Mithrun actually likes cooking and will probably want to take turns making the food. Except his food is crap at first. Total shit. He’ll learn.
When Mithrun is irritated or mad at you gives you the silent treatment. He’s grumpy. He’ll mutter under his breath a little. Just love on him until he softens up. Wrap your arms around him from behind and harass him a bit.
Speaking of harassment, Mithrun does that all the time. You’ve got some paperwork or whatever that you’re working on? Well he wants your attention. Right now. And he’s going to get it.
You just see him walk into the room with that look in his eye, his pupils focused, his mouth set in a line. And you groan because you know he’s about to do everything in his power to distract you.
That means flopping down like a rag doll in your lap. Or kissing your neck, biting a bit. His hands are going places. He won’t outright say he wants attention, but it’s clear he wants it.
Then the moment you actually give him attention, he gets up and wanders away.
He steals the blankets at night, but fortunately does not spread out much.
I feel like Mithrun would have a bunch of weird hobbies. He’s just throwing stuff at the wall and seeing what sticks. There’s pottery, of course. But that’s kind of messy. He makes really dumb bowls too. Idk, they’re just dumb looking bowls.
He takes up gardening. But one time he didn’t realize he was getting too hot and he kinda collapsed face first into the squash patch. He tasted dirt that day. It was fine.
He tried knitting! He makes a horrible little stuffed pig and sends it to Milsiril. She doesn’t respond with a thank you letter or anything. She hides it in a box in her attic so she doesn’t have to look at it.
Mithrun isn’t concerned with being good at these things, he’s just doing them to do them. King behavior
I think you’d both eventually adopt a pet. And by adopt I mean Mithrun found this dog digging through the trash and brought it home.
You share each other’s clothes a lot. It doesn’t matter how small or big you are, Mithrun is pulling on your sweater and drowning in the scent of you. He also likes seeing you in his clothes! I imagine he wears tall-man clothes half the time tbh, idk I just like Mithrun in baggy flowy tunics that are rolled up at the arms… But elf clothes physically fit him better because he’s so smol.
Generally, your life is peaceful. You might go with him on monster surveys, or help at the noodle shop. You’re a team, you move in sync with each other, able to tell what the other is thinking just from a look.
Often around other people, you and Mithrun silently communicate through passing glances.
He never takes his ring off. Never. He gets grumpy if you take yours off.
Mithrun’s brother likes to visit. I headcanon that his brother has a family by now (UNCLE MITHRUN!!!) and they all love you. (One night he’s putting his niece or nephew to bed and they’re like ‘uncle Mithrun, the hat man doesn’t like you’ and he’s like ..okay. Thank you for letting me know.)
You two have a routine! Mithrun lives by routine anyway, so you quickly follow and do your daily things. It’s not boring though because you’re happy to be doing them together.
Life is calm and he’s content. It’s so much more than he ever thought he’d get. He’s going to savor every second.
♡︎ Kabru ♡︎
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Kabru’s proposal is simple and intimate, but he makes sure to do things right. He tells you to meet him at a certain spot and that you’re ’going shopping’ for something. But lol no he’s proposing
Except of course something goes terribly wrong and Kabru is left a stressed out mess and wants to redo the whole thing. But tough luck buddy, you’ve already accepted. He sighs and furrows his brows and smiles, giving you that look that tells the world just how he feels. It’s soft and adoring and so in love.
Kabru is involved in the wedding planning for every step of the way. He’s almost a bit controlling with it.
He knows so many people that the guest list quickly reaches the hundreds.
Eventually Kabru gives up and you two plan to have something small and private instead. Which is a relief, because with something private he won’t feel the need to mask himself the entire time, to play the part.
He’s so! Excited! To see you in your wedding clothes!
He’s actually a bit gushy about it. Like he’s trying to hide his excitement. He puts his hand over his mouth to hide his smile, but his eyes are wide and he’s all riled up.
At the reception you honestly just sit in the corner together and whisper all night. For once he doesn’t intend on using this opportunity to gain information or insight.
Onto home life! Maybe for a tiny bit, you two live in his little room? Just until you get a house.
His landlord teases constantly.
Once you do get a place to stay, he actually doesn’t care about decorating all that much. He’s got stuff though, books and notebooks and random things he’s gathered over the years.
Kabru is a mess. He isn’t gross, but he’s unorganized and kinda just tosses his clothes on the floor. He leaves drawers open, and cabinets open.
He sleeps spread out, limbs everywhere. He drools sometimes. He makes you promise to not tell anyone that ever.
Kabru doesn’t cook. He’ll attempt it for you, though. He’ll try a lot of new things for you. He tries to eat more, to sleep more, and actually take care of himself. He knows you’d like that.
Kabru is pretty social. He keeps you up to date on every little endeavor he has going on. You have a routine of going to this restaurant or tavern frequently and he’ll lean in close to you and whisper about the people.
That guy over there? He’s got some information on this. Kabru’s going to buy him a drink.
This isn’t as effective as it was before Melini became a nation, though, when he was just an adventurer on the island. Because now Kabru is the King’s advisor and people are a little intimidated by him.
This frustrates him. When you get home and sit on the couch, he’ll lay his head in your lap or wrap his arms around your waist and complain. He likes being the advisor, but he doesn’t like how people think he’s intimidating and royal or important.
You visit Kabru at the castle often! Hell, maybe you even live in the castle with him! Idk how that works.
He has a lot of stuffy meetings with diplomats and important people, and you’ll often be on his arm. Galas, parties, dinners. It’s kind of exhausting. But Kabru loves every minute of it. He’s got you next to him, and he’s got the Kahka Brud diplomat tipsy enough to openly discuss the Queen’s affair with a servant. It’s so great.
You also share a lot of knowing looks with Kabru. When Laois does something Laois-y, you just look at each other.
Kabru isn’t much for PDA, he cares about who’s watching and what they think. He’s actually a little paranoid that people might find a way to use you against him. So he’s constantly planting these little ideas in people’s heads, about what might happen if anyone messed with you… It’s more subtle than I’m able to exemplify but you get the point.
Your husband has a room dedicated to his thoughts. His sherlock holmes mind palace.
It’s actually just a dark room where he puts pictures of people on the walls and connects them all with red yarn. You walk in with a lamp and he just flinches and squints at the light. Little freak.
He will talk your ear off, explaining each and every thought he has in his little web. Actually, doing that helps him sort things out and come to realizations!
He likes sitting on the floor with you in his lap, his arms around your waist. Idk he’s just the kind of guy to sit on the floor and stare at the wall in deep thought.
Kabru doesn’t really get mad at you. He gets very concerned if you do something reckless and might look a bit frustrated on the outside, but he generally keeps his cool and speaks respectfully.
He can be a bit snarky though.
Different from most couples, you don’t terrorize each other that much. You might terrorize him, but he doesn’t do that. Kabru doesn’t do pranks or cute little revenge things. Kabru’s idea of terrorizing someone is slowly gaslighting them into insanity over the years. He won’t do that to you, obviously.
He never takes his ring off! He’s hurt if you take yours off.
He dances a lot with you when you’re alone. He’ll come up behind you and wrap his arms around your waist and sway a little. He’ll grab your hand and your hip and spin you around the kitchen. There’s no music, he doesn’t need it. He just wants to see you laugh.
If you make horrible crappy food he’ll still eat it. He hesitates to tell you it’s bad. It’s only when you insist on his opinion that he’ll admit it’s shit. (But he does so nicely)
Wear his clothes. Please. Please wear his clothes, it drives him crazy. You’ll be the death of him.
Y’all are weird, you match each others freaks. He adores your quirks and hobbies and is genuinely interested in learning about everything.
Seriously. He wants to know everything. Every thought that passes through your pretty head, every inch of you, every beat of your heart. He explores your body a lot. He worships you.
Kabru never thought he’d get married, actually. Not that he was opposed to the idea, he just wasn’t considering it until he met you. He’s extremely loyal, though, and you’re stuck with him forever. He reminds you of that often.
He keeps a mental list of people who have flirted with you or checked you out. He has his eye on them.
Kabru likes being the little spoon!
He likes bathing with you, washing your hair. It’s just intimate for him.
Your evenings are spent talking about everything and nothing. And he’s not digging for info, he’s just enjoying himself.
He likes to watch you sleep sometimes. Don’t ask why, just let him do his thing.
Milsiril visits often. She’s a relatively chill mother in law, if not a bit clingy. But she won’t just cling to Kabru, she’ll cling to you too (after you prove your worth)
Milsiril unfortunately shows up without warning sometimes, and her timing is horrible. It’s usually when you and Kabru are kissing and your hands are everywhere and you’re being gently laid on the bed and—
Oh there’s elf mom.
He gets embarrassed with her. She tells a lot of stories she thinks are cute. Kabru does not think they’re cute.
Once she leaves there’s a huge sigh of relief.
Kabru speaks other languages to you sometimes, but he refuses to tell you what he’s said.
Life with Kabru is interesting! You’re always busy. You’ve always got something going on. But it’s those moments when you’re in bed together, when your limbs are tangled in the dark, that he treasures the most.
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doberbutts · 9 months
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Curious about something you mentioned in your post last week, you said that in your opinion all drugs should be legal and I’m curious about how that would be a positive at all? Like I get weed bc it’s pretty harmless but when I think of drugs I think of cocaine and heroin, which have destroyed so many lives. If it was widely available wouldn’t that end up hurting more people than helping? That’s just my opinion but I’m curious on the other side
I do think all drugs should be legal. This is said knowing that addiction runs in my family and that the only reason my older sister is my *sister* is due to drug use and addiction. Otherwise she'd be my cousin.
Making drugs illegal does not stop people from getting high. It does not stop drug related crime. And it certainly does not stop drugs from tearing families apart.
Addiction is a symptom of a larger problem. Solve the problem and the addict problem goes away. Solve the addict problem and drugs stop ruining lives and destroying families and creating massive amounts of drug related violence. Places that have roled out decriminalization strategies effectively have seen an overall reduction in crime rates across the board, a reduction in recreational drug use, and a reduction in bloodborne illness like HIV. Creating safe needle exchanges as well as safe places to get high with medical staff onhand has also created a locale where very few people die from overdose.
Most people hear "decriminalize all drugs" and think I mean a free-for-all. I don't. I think the drug market should be regulated. I don't think you should be able to get ketamine or heroin over the counter at a walmart like you can get asprin. But I think it's time to stop putting people in jail for getting high.
My aunt tore her life and her family and her health apart for years while she was addicted to heroin. My sister, her daughter, needed to be removed from her care due to the amazingly bad choices she made as a mother due to her addiction and her prioritizing drugs over the health and safety of her daughter. My aunt has had multiple heart attacks from the damage the constant drug use did to her body.
My aunt is more than a decade sober and do you know why? It's not because she got a wakeup call when her daughter was taken away, because at the time she willingly and freely signed her over to my parents because that got her "out of [her] hair". It's not because she had a heart attack, because she went right back to it the moment she was out of the hospital. It's not even because she spent time in rehab and prison, because the moment she was out she was using again.
No, my aunt got sober because her life changed. She was put on a better pain management plan. She got out of her shitty marriage to her shitty husband. She completed some education to make her more hireable so she didn't have to rely on less than safe means of paying her bills. She reconnected with my sister and reforged their relationship once she was 18. She bought her own house. She found love with someone who didn't give a shit about her past and brought out the best in her.
My aunt was a deeply unhappy person. Heroin made life more tolerable for her. Until she couldn't tolerate life without it. Until she'd do anything, anything, to get her next high.
A lot of addicts are addicts because they are self-medicating for something else and their drug of choice has chemical properties that makes their brains crave it more. If you fix the "deeply unhappy" part, you create a healthier environment for that addict to take control over their life again. Without it, they are far more likely to continue to relapse.
Knowing this, why would I then want to add the threat of prison and jailtime- life-ruining things themselves- to an addict's list of concerns?
Look up rat park sometime. In the rat paradise, drugged water was freely offered, and occasional a rat here or there would take a hit or two, but rarely enough to even get high and almost never habitually. Addiction literally didn't exist even though the rats were taking addictive substances. But the rats in cages, seperated from each other, with no enrichment, crammed into small spaces and stressed to hell? Those rats took hit after hit after hit until they overdosed and died. The addict rats were deeply unhappy. The drugs were their only escape. The paradise rats had to be lured in with sweetened drugs to even consider and even then they rejected them. The caged rats did not need sweetner, even though the drugs made the water bitter.
If we can see such a stark difference in rats having their needs met vs rats experiencing isolation and stress, what would happen if we showed human addicts the same consideration?
I think a lot better results than continuing to jail deeply unhappy and desperate people for doing the only thing they can think of to cope.
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norrisjpg · 28 days
Text
no surprises - ʟɴ⁴
based on this request from @jxnellat - thankyou lovely!!
in which, lando's bias opinion regarding the open red bull seat proves to stop a new friendship blossoming - until he proves himself wrong.
contains: unconscious bias, smallest bit of angst, shit-talking, carlos not to red bull (NOO), justice for logan because i give him an extra year in f2, mentions of christian horner (AH), social media, fluff, lando admitting he's wrong, mentions of struggles with mental health, williams not being shit.
platonic lando norris x named female character (senna hamilton)
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carlos sainz jr's first choice was always going to be red bull. why wouldn't it be? the team was dominating the formula 1 world, and he was sure they wouldn't fuck him over like ferrari had many, many times.
but, tough luck for him.
before he could even think about getting into talks with christian and helmut - the world was rocked with the news of formula one's first female driver, moving to her dad's previous rival team.
senna hamilton might as well have broken the media. she was currently racing for williams alongside alex albon, but had no word from her superiors as to whether they were going to extend her contract with williams or whether there was any interest from mercedes.
so, she looked elsewhere.
and honestly, it came as a shock when her manager explained that christian horner wanted to arrange a meeting to discuss her seat for 2025 - due to sergio perez's less-than-admirable performance in the first half of the 2024 season.
either way, it was safe to say, that the hamilton family had given the world yet another reason to look forward to the 2025 season, and also given them all aneurysms in the process.
lando norris wasn't one for commenting on other driver's situations, but when it came to carlos sainz jr, he didn't hesistate as much as he usually would.
"so, lando, as we know you're good friends with carlos, and well, there's now one less team for him to go to - with senna going to red bull next year - can we just get your thoughts on that?" the blonde woman asked him, steadily holding the microphone out in front of him.
"well, obviously i think carlos deserves the best available seat possible, and that would have most likely been the red bull seat - so i think he should be in the red bull - but, i do think it will be interesting to see what senna can do in the red bull alongside max, but i'm just hoping that carlos can also get a good seat for next year." lando nodded, slightly stumbling over his words as his PR manager side-eyed him.
"okay, so you think that carlos deserves to be in the red bull?"
"yeah, i do - not that senna doesn't deserve the red bull seat, i'm sure she does, but i'm just going off how well i know each of them. obviously carlos and i have known each other since 2019, i've only known senna since 2022 and well, we don't really talk much." lando shrugged, pursing his lips.
"okay, thankyou lando." the woman nodded, before he and his PR manager headed back toward the mclaren hospitality.
his PR manager looked at the interviewer as the two walked away, she had a bad feeling about this.
meanwhile, the joyful tune of 'taste' by sabrina carpenter blasted out of senna's driver room in the mercedes garage, as the british girl bounced around her room, dancing to the song - when her PR manager, cameron, walked in.
"i've got some interesting news, sen."
...
well, as hard as lando tried not to give them that headline they so badly wanted - he somehow still did.
'senna doesn't deserve the red bull seat claims star formula 1 driver, lando norris.'
now, senna wasn't usually a confrontational person, but this was bang out of order, and she definitely didn't expect it from someone she didn't know that well. therefore, she requested a meeting with lando and his PR manager.
"so, would you like to explain this headline please?" senna asked as she slid a piece of paper over to him, the headline printed along with the article - she felt like she was interrogating someone in a james bond movie.
"what about it?" lando said gruffly, not entirely sure how to react to this situation.
"this is the equivalent of me saying you didn't deserve your win in miami, and then everyone agreeing with me, lando." she pursed her lips, earning a side-eye from her own manager.
"i don't really know what you want me to say?" the mclaren driver furrowed his eyebrows. "i never explicitly said that."
"i know, i watched the interview, but you might as well have." a soft scoff left her lips. "i don't actually care if you think i deserve the seat or not, i would just like you to undo this. i face enough prejudice and discrimination as it is, but i certainly didn't expect it from a fellow competitor, i'm disappointed quite frankly, lando."
her words hit like a tonne of fucking bricks - how could he be so fucking blind? lando thought that she'd asked for this meeting to have a go at him and tell him how wrong he was, but once again, he was wrong.
suddenly, he felt almost... sympathetic for her? yes, he also experienced a lot of hate online and he knew how much it affected his mental health - but if one of his competitors had said something like he had? he'd be a fucking wreck on the inside.
"oh, um, okay, yeah." he said, a little quieter as the realisations hit him. "yeah, i'm sorry, senna."
"i don't want an apology, lando." she shrugged, a small smile on her lips. "i just want this to go away."
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INSTAGRAM
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liked by georgerussell, charlesleclerc, maxverstappen33, and 421,294 others. sennahamilton ... strong weekend in belgium, another good haul of points with alex in P8 and myself in P7. time for a much needed break after a great first half of the season, see you all in zandvoort!!
view comments ...
alex_albon ... williams are washed who???
user1 ... double points!!!
user2 ... she better not get P7 in a red bull next year
↳ landonorris ... i'd like to see you try and finish a race?
↳ liked by sennahamilton
mercedesamgf1 ... things we love to see - roscoeee!!
user3 ... red bull are seriously desperate after the first half of the season, aren't they?
↳ sennahamilton ... why wouldn't you be desperate for me?
↳ liked by landonorris
landonorris has started following you!
sennahamilton has started following you!
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"good morning miss hamilton." a recently familiar voice chimed in her ears, and then the unmistakable bright papaya hoodie appeared in her peripheral vision.
"good morning lando." she smiled, sounding a little tired of his recent apology antics.
"i have an urgent question for you." he said, falling into step with her as they walked past the haas hospitality.
"go on." she nodded, walking straight past the williams garage.
"would you be so kind as to accompany me back to monaco this evening after the race?"
"what?" she furrowed her eyebrows, stopping in her tracks.
"you live in monaco, correct?" lando stood in front of her, maybe a foot or so away from her.
"yes." senna nodded, wetting her lips briefly with her tongue.
"and i also live in monaco, i've got a few extra spaces on my jet, and was wondering if you'd like to join me." he explained. "it'd be me, you, max, daniel, charles, and carlos."
"ah, okay, i see." she nodded. "what's brought this on?"
"well, since we're friends now, i thought- well i don't really know i just wanted to know if you wanted to come with us or not."
"uhm... yeah, okay." senna knew she was a little unsure at this sudden gesture, but she went along with it regardless. "i'll let my dad know, but yeah, thanks."
"cool!" lando smiled, trying to sound as nonchalant about it as possible - he failed miserably. "uh, we're meeting at the airport at eight in the evening, and there'll be food on the plane."
"right, okay." she responded as they began to walk again. "not to sound fussy or anything, but the food... there won't be any fish, will there?"
"ew, of course not, i hate fish." he almost grimaced at the thought, but then his brain immediately clocked onto the fact that she sounded as equally as disgusted as him at the idea. "i'm assuming you don't like fish either?"
"i'd rather skin myself alive than eat fish, lando."
why hadn't he ever bothered to talk to her before?
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INSTAGRAM
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liked by landonorris, danielricciardo, maxverstappen33, and 513,482 others.
sennahamilton ... the whole point of this post is so i can show everyone how weirdly adorable lando and daniel are together - that's all.
view comments ...
landonorris ... i fly you home and you call me weird? last time bitch
↳ sennahamilton ... woah i also called you adorable so shut up
↳ user1 ... lando and senna are friends??
maxverstappen33 ... how come you always say no to me when i ask you to fly with me??
↳ sennahamilton ... i don't want to be friends with you :)
↳ landonorris ... this means you want to be friends with me??
danielricciardo ... i have no recollection of taking those photos
user4 ... i feel as if we might see a group-grid holiday this summer
liked by sennahamilton and carlossainz55
...
"miss hamilton!" lando exclaimed loudly as he skipped up to her in the quiet airport - making her cheeks grow pink in embarrassment.
"lando, shut up." senna groaned, internally praying people around her hadn't noticed that it was, in fact, her and lando.
"sorry, where is your positive attitude?" he teased, a sharp edge of sarcasm to his voice.
"in the plane." she mumbled, dragging her pink suitcase behind her as they walked toward their gate together.
"come on, sen, we're going to disneyland!" the brit cheered, making an amused smile creep onto senna's lips, mostly the mclaren driver's child-like excitement. "actually, i have something to admit to you."
"oh god, go ahead."
"i never thought you didn't deserve the red bull seat, sen." he shrugged, his tone changing but a smile still on his face. "and if anything, i knew you deserved it - maybe more than carlos."
she laughed with a small wink, "i won't tell him you said that."
,,,
ah i actually really enjoyed writing this!! the social media parts especially, so maybe i'll start doing more social media fics??
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andy-wm · 1 month
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The Tarot of VMINKOOK
Their dynamic as I see it, and the absolute validation that Jimin and JK are together.
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I really enjoyed the 3rd episode of Are You Sure, partly because I love the VMin dynamic, and partly becuse I was relieved to see that JK and Tae got along.
I also enjoyed watching just the three of them together without the rest of the members because I could really focus on the way they interacted.
This post is entirely my own opinion, and based on my observations. Feel free to politely disagree.
What we had was:
The Siblings - JK & KTH
The Cousins - JM & KTH
The Lovers - JM &JK
The Siblings
JK and Tae have peak adolescent sibling energy Pre-adolescent maybe....
It's typical of the petty rivalry of siblings close in age where the younger is the dominant personality and the older is slightly mistified by the audacity of their little brother.
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Tae's eye-roll here 🤣
They will argue over nothing, but they will also readily unite when they have a common goal or foe. In this episode, they ganged up on Jimin for the sake of amusing the viewers (I get that they had a mandate to be entertaining but seriously, poor Jimin 🤣.)
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At least it gave JK and Tae a reason to cooperate, because we know JK wasn't thrilled about him joining them. And who can blame him... how often do the two of them get away together?
Tae and JK probably have that "I can talk shit about my brother but nobody else can" thing going on, and I am 100% sure either of them would jump to defend the other if someone outside Bangtan gave them reason to.
I'm sure JK sees Tae as a genuine brother, but that doesn't mean Tae doesn't irritate the hell out of him sometimes. We've seen Tae take liberties, and we've seen JK snipe at him.
What is clear to me, seeing the three of them together, is that competitive-natured JK has to curb his desire to compete with Tae for Jimin's attention - to steal Jimin from Tae - and we've seen him do it, so it's not unheard of. The bottom line is, JK doesn't love sharing Jimin. And that being true, having to totally relinquish Jimin must have been... challenging let's say.
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Even giving him a Harley to ride wasn't enough compensation for JK's FOMO when VMin were having fun in the car without him. And that grimace he wore when he was enjoying his solo gokart ride was absolutely hilarious too.
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The other thing that comes between them, based on what I've seen, is JK's impatience with Tae's quirkiness. JK does not seem to have the gentle fondness or the endless patience Jimin does with Tae, which brings me to...
The Cousins
Tae and Jimin are like those cousins. You know the ones I mean? The cousins who have that magical bond. They connect on some ultraviolet wavelength nobody else can see, and it's both delightful and annoying for everyone around them (especially for the ultra-competitive boyfriend of one of the cousins, who feels like he's the third wheel when the those two get together).
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Jimin and Tae are 친구 - same age friends - and this automatically puts them together - they are peers. It creates an instant friendship bond. But their connection seems like more than that, because Jimin and Tae seem to be so at ease together that neither of them has to mask, and that means they trust one another. That type of deep connection between two people can only come from unconditional acceptance.
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Tae doesnt know how to use a drive-thru, and Jimin patiently helps him.
I believe that even if they grow apart, their unique connection will always remain... Because you never forget your first, right?
I'm talking about the first person who really sees you.
Maybe they're the first person you come out to and who comforts you when you're afraid of what that might mean for you. Maybe they're the person who never teases you when you miss social cues, and who will quietly explain the joke you didn't get. Whatever your situation, that person is the one who you trust with your real self. You know you're safe with them.
Both Tae and Jimin have characteristics that set them apart. I'm not in the habit of diagnosing people but Tae does make me wonder, the way he lacks social awareness and sometimes goes off on bizzare tangents, and his very individual fashion sense... not to mention his hatred of shoes. Jimin's gender and sexual identity would have been equally challenging for him, trying as he was to fit in and be a strong man.
They would both have felt like outsiders and struggled with connection and belonging, and I think their genuine support of each other is what makes their friendship so special.
I think that's what the soulmates thing is all about.
And who could possibly compete with a soulmate? Only one person...
In this social game of cards, JK holds the trump.
The Lovers
There's only one reason JK would rank higher in Jimin's books than Tae, when Tae automatically has higher standing on both a personal level with Jimin, and a broader social level.
Jimin and Tae are 친구 - they have a bond unique to people born in their year. That bond means younger or older friends are always going to be more distant, because even with close friendships across age groups, honorifics will still apply. Only with chingus can the honorifics completely fall away.
In addition, Tae is older than JK, so automatically holds a higher social standing. Even though Tae and JK are friends, JK should still defer to him, especially where his chingu is concerned. But JK does not.
This can only mean one thing:
Jimin and JK are in a relationship.
JK's status as Jimin's partner outweighs any other relationships Jimin has. Therefore JK stands as an equal next to Jimin, and that shuffles everyone else down a notch.
That's why we see JK squeezing in next to Jimin (sometimes pushing the older members out) so he can get where he needs wants to be.
That's also why, in episode 3, JK could take the bed next to Jimin and leave Tae to sleep on the floor.
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Aside from JK's position as Jimin's equal, we can clearly see that he takes care of Jimin in ways he wouldn't if they were not together. He may not defer to Jimin, but he is visibly devoted to him.
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I have never had any doubt that Jimin and JK were lovers, and I never for a moment thought they broke up. It's no surprise to me that this is confirned when we see them on this trip.
But I'm still dying to see the next episode with Tae.
Bring on Thursday!!
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Solo Leveling Brainrots
Fellow Jinwoo Simps I need your thoughts and opinion!! Also MASSIVE brainrot warning!!!
QUESTION: How do you think Jinwoo would react to his partner questioning his taste in lovers? (ie. Being interested in Reader themselves)
How id imagine the confession would go: Jinwoo, pre-awakening: I like you *holds bouquet of flowers Reader, confused: um! *looks around to see if he's talking to someone behind them before pointing at themselves confused*... me? Jinwoo: Yes, You. Reader, Shocked: oh! Um... I like you too... but *hesitates* are you sure? About me??
The feeling is mutual!!! It's just his lover doesn't have alot of confidence in themselves. Or any confidence into getting a romance with anyone, let alone Jinwoo!! Reader feels like they have ZERO RIZZ (reader has enough rizz to woo Jinwoo so...).
Like would he hype them up???? Mayhaps but in subtle ways though I'd imagine🤔🤔. You think he'd be extra affectionate when reader gets shy??? Would this differ pre and post awakening?? (I imagine Jinwoo and reader wouldn't want the relationship public due to safety since hes a hunter and all)
AND WHAT ABOUT HIS POST AWAKENING GLOWUP AND THE FANS!!! READERS ALREADY SHY BUT THE TABLOID EVENTUALLY CHIPS AT THE SLOWLY BUILT CONFIDENCE JINWOO HELPED BUILD.
OHMYGOSH WHAT ABOUT THE TABLOIDS WITH CHA HAE-IN???? WOULD HE GET WORRIED SINCE READER MIGHT GET INSECURE OR JUST KINDA SAD???
WHAT IF READER TELLS HIM THAT HE DESERVES BETTER, BELIVJNG THAT READWR DOESNT DESERVE HIS LOVE?? AAAA OUCHHHH.. I GUESS HE HAS TO STAY WITH READER AND REMIND THEM OF HIS UNWAVERING LOVE WITH CUDDLES AND QUALITY TIME DJBDBFIDN
(reader is Jinwoo's ride-or-die, the monarch of his heart and soul, the love reader gives him is like comfort of warm soup at the end of the day, the kind that soothes even the deepest of wounds. Reader's love is also a drug, one that he cant get enough of. If he loses reader, Jinwoo would go insane.)
AUDBUDBDIBD HOLY!!!! WOULD HE GET PISSED ABOUT IT AND ENDS UP GETTING CLINGY IF CRAZY SHIPPERS TRYING TO PUT READER IN DANGER IE. SENDING A MONSTER READER'S WAY BECAUSE OF THEM BEING A "THREAT" TO THEIR SHIP (HIM AND CHA HAE-IN)??? I MEAN LIKE GUIDE THE MONSTER SPECIFICALLY AWAY FROM THE DUNGEON TO READERS LOCATION TOO. (TO THE EXTENT THAT ITS CLEARLY FOUL PLAY)
LIKE THANK THE MONARCHS THAT READER HAD SHADOWS ASSIGNED AND MAYBE WAS DECENTLY RANKED AFTER AWAKENING BUT IT COULD HAVE ENDED AWFUL IF THE FATES WERENT ON READERS SIDE!!
WOULD HIS ARMY GET PROTECTIVE TOO?? IGRIS??? BERU??? LIKE HOW DARE THESE FOOLS HARM THEIR MONARCHS BELOVED?!?!?!? 😡😡EVEN WORSE IS IF READER WORMED THEIR WAY INTI THEIR HEARTS BY GENUINELY GETTING TO KNOW THEM SO ITS PERSONAL NOW TOO!!
Reader has to calm down not only a PISSED jinwoo but his Shadows too (mainly Jinwoo though)!! And maybe being the only reason Jinwoo hadn't gone on a rampage after everything setted. Was he bribed with a heated makout session and plenty of cuddles afterwards to temper his rage and soothe his anxiety, yes. Did it work??? Probably. If it did??That's none of our buisness.
Id imagie Cha Hae-in would feel bad™ if they found out about Jinwoo and reader (just assuming the two being best friends)?? Being like "oh shit someone, a civilian no less, almost died because of her fans" Even worse if later on she learns that they're together aaaaa
But like seriously, what a messed up reminder of the power S-Rank Hunter have on the media. Yes, they know about their celebrity status affecting what they can or can't do but like this??? A whole different level, because yes, people targeting other?? Awful? Yes, but its fine. Using a MONSTER FROM A DUNGEON to target a CIVILIAN?? This is a whole new level of messed up.
Would the other S-ranks and National-ranked hunters feel like kinda bad too once they hear about it??
what the fuck??? For the following reasons:
No one deserves that
Its a civilian going against fans that are most likely hunters, the very individuals hunters are ment to protect from monsters ever since the dungeons appeared
THE HUNTERS USED A HIGH RANKED MONSTER TO TARGET A CIVILIAN (the mutual enemy internationally)
this was all done because PEOPLE BEING ENTITLMENT OF THE RELATIONSHIPS OF THE S-RANK HUNTERS.
This is furthur solidified and makes the WHOLE DEBACHLE worse because only EXPERIENCED hunters would have the knowledge and experince to be able to lure a monster from a dungeon break to a specific location, especially if reader wasn't even near the dungeon in the first place.
(For anyone who's read this all the way, thanks for reading my silly thoughts!)
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crucialplayer · 1 year
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Thoughts on mercury placements
!! everything is based purely on my experiences with signs, written with no other purpose than to share my observations and be unserious.
Gemini mercury. Throw shit at the wall and see what sticks mercury. When they talk be sure ur not the only one hearing this thought for the first time - they are too. They think as they speak. Cannot hold info inside of them longer than 5 minutes so no secrets kept, no embarrassing opinions left unspoken.
Sagittarius mercury. This one doesn’t really stir the pot, usually just blows it up. They are bold with words for no reason. What they are saying is almost always what they truly think. Will give a random lecture that no one asked for on a topic they barely know anything about.
Aries mercury. Сan either be supeeeer fun or suuuuuper insane and nothing in between. Very expressive and usually swear a lot, but they have the best sense of timing with it. No filter of course, so often get themselves in trouble with that whirlwind of a mouth.
Scorpio mercury. They kinda have a talent for talking shit in the most cutting way. It’s like a perfect combo of clairvoyance and knowing where to strike with that deadly sting using words. Sometimes don’t recognize when they’ve overdone it tho so they can come across as edgy.
Virgo mercury. Meticulous mercury, very observant. They talk even faster than Gemini mercuries but they actually manage to get their point across. Can be blunt but typically when it’s much needed. There’s a reason why this is ultimately the best mercury placement.
Capricorn mercury. Dry as fuck. Also I’ve noticed they like to complain a lot but not on abstract themes. More like being precise about why this thing sucks. Can be very adamant and stubborn with their opinions. Can sound so confident you forget to analyze what they are saying.
Pisces mercury. So whimsical and romantic but at what cost. Literally can never tell what they are trying to convey, pretty sure they have no idea too. Get carried away with their associations and metaphors that make sense only to them. If they’re nerdy it’s even worse.
Cancer mercury. Awkward with words but in a cute way. Hate to be misconstrued and taken out of context. Therefore tend to over-explain themselves and things in general but in a way that makes the point slip away further. Also very sentimental.
Aquarius mercury. Usually like to argue on social justice issues… with people who are removed from politics as much as possible. Don't care to be understood by people they consider irrelevant to them. It's like the fewer people actually do get them the better they feel but that’s just my theory. Also artistic.
Libra mercury. More concise than Pisces but ur still kinda left with a «what...» feeling. Also poetic and romantic. They usually have 1 or 2 topics they can talk about hours on end but can lose interest once the convo shifts onto something else. Like to giggle a lot too.
Leo mercury. I call this one bimbo mercury in the best way possible. Very entertaining and charismatic, but don’t give much thought to what they’re saying. Like to be the authority in every convo and if they are not they just kinda… leave. Loud (if they don't have a water sun).
Taurus mercury. Time ceases to exist, nature slows its rhythm. Some might call it relaxing I call it torture. If surrounded by their friends they tend to speed up and show more of a goofy side. Nice voices, yes yes.
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st6rrrs · 7 months
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TRAITOR || rafe cameron x fem reader
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summary: the pogues find out yn's secret
warnings: cursing, arguing, soft rafe!!!, fluff?
a/n: idk if i should keep this into to a one shot or make a story!!!!
Part 2
˗ˋ ୨୧ ˊ˗ —— ˗ˋ ୨୧ ˊ˗ —— ˗ˋ ୨୧ ˊ˗ —— ˗ˋ ୨୧ ˊ˗ —— ˗ˋ ୨୧ ˊ˗ —— ˗ˋ ୨୧ ˊ˗
you and rafe were in his bed talking when you realized what time it was, 5:29pm
"Shit rafe i gotta go" you said
you jumped off of the bed and quickly put your clothes on
"where are you going?" he asked getting off the bed also
"i gotta go to the chateau to meet up with the pogues"
he groaned.
you grab your backpack and head to the door but before you could open it rafe got in front of you.
"do you have to leave" rafe whines
"yes rafe, i'll be back in a couple of hours" you say
"fine" he groans again but louder this time, he walks back to the bed laying on it getting his phone out, you roll your eyes and exit the room.
˗ˋ ୨୧ ˊ˗ —— ˗ˋ ୨୧ ˊ˗ —— ˗ˋ ୨୧ ˊ˗ —— ˗ˋ ୨୧ ˊ˗ —— ˗ˋ ୨୧ ˊ˗ —— ˗ˋ ୨୧ ˊ˗
you get on your bike and start pedaling towards the cut.
you and rafe have been dating for a couple of months now but you guys haven't told anyone yet. if the pogues find out that you and rafe have been dating they would be PISSED
thats one of the reasons you dont wanna go public, rafe honestly doesn't give a shit if anyone finds out because he will still love you and you would still love him.
you arrive at the chateau and you see the pogues on the front porch, Sarah was sitting next to john b? why was Sarah here?
kie disliked Sarah for as long as you can remember. When kie and Sarah were friends Sarah threw this party without inviting kie and kie got mad and called the cops.
"you know we were all extremely comfortable until you brought her."
you hear kie say as you approach them
"stop talking about me like im not here" Sarah says
"then leave."
"umm whats happening?" you mouth to pope and jj passing kie, Sarah, and john b them to busy arguing to notice you. You walk over to sit in between jj and pope.
"john b is banging Sarah" jj says while laughing
"WHAT" you almost yell
"oh look y/n is here, why dont we ask her opinion is on this" kie says
"please don't" you whine "but if im being honest i dont think its a good idea"
Sarah's scoffs
"oh you can talk" she says looking at you
"what?" you laugh
"like you aren't fucking my brother" she says rolling her eyes and looking away
you immediately go pale.
"is that true y/n?" kie ask you in disbelief
you don't answer her
jj gets up from beside you and just looks at you in disbelief. you look over at pope his hand on his forehead and he's shaking his head disappointed.
"you cant be fucking serious!" jj yells at you "he beat up pope with a golf club and then jumped us with topper and kelce"
jj has had a crush on you ever since you guys were 14 but you didn't feel the same way. Everyone always shipped you guys together but you wouldn't force yourself to date someone you didn't like You only liked jj as a friend but he never really listened to you.
"i-i-im sorry!! but he's different with me" you try to explain to them
"hes just gonna use you like he does every other girl on this island" Sarah says
"no he-" but before you could finish your sentence pope interrupted you
"just leave y/n." he said annoyed not looking at you
"g-guys please!"
"JUST FUCKING LEAVE JEEZ!" jj yells at you, you have never seen him this angry in the whole 7 years you knew him.
tears rolled down your cheeks as you looked at him. He had no remorse for what he said he was very angry and you could understand why but none of them even gave you a chance to explain yourself. You quickly grabbed your bag pack and left without looking back.
"AND DONT BOTHER COMING BACK EITHER! HAVE FUN WITH YOUR KOOKY BOYFRIEND" jj yelled before you could leave
˗ˋ ୨୧ ˊ˗ —— ˗ˋ ୨୧ ˊ˗ —— ˗ˋ ୨୧ ˊ˗ —— ˗ˋ ୨୧ ˊ˗ —— ˗ˋ ୨୧ ˊ˗ —— ˗ˋ ୨୧ ' -
you open the front door to the camerons household, rafe gave you the key when you guys started dating. the house was so quite and cold, you walk up the stairs to rafe room still sobbing.
you open his room door and hes sleep on his bed, it was sometime pass 7 you didn't want to wake him and you were exhausted yourself so you just laid next to him and got under the covers still sobbing quietly. you couldn't believe that jj would ever say that too you, it wasn't like him
you hear rafe groan awake
"y/n is that you" he says in his sleepy voice
"yea"
"are you crying?"
"im fine go back to sleep rafe."
"no.,whats wrong come here" he gestured so you could lay on his chest
you gave in and sobbed in his chest for a while until you fell asleep.
part 2?
this might be bad but i tried 😪 👍🏻
taglist:
@bbsxsaa @xxbutdaddyilovehimxx @drewstarkeyslut @stvrkey. @blondbrat @sevenwivesofrafecameron @tracymbcm
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very-straight-blog · 4 months
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It really tires me how some fans try to make Aegon look like an asshole who doesn't give a shit about anything. This is a fundamental misunderstanding of his character as such. Of course he cares, that's literally the essence of his personality. He cares. He and Aemond both feel too much emotion, but if Aemond sublimates into self–improvement, trying to be strong, cold and detached, then Aegon is literally an open wound. I want to talk about this, also using Tom's interviews (yes, I think the actor's opinion is valid in this matter) and the few scenes that we have in the first season.
We know that Aegon didn't want the throne and wasn't ready to rule. The scene with Alicent, who explains to him the prospects for the future of their family, seems very traumatic to me. Imagine what it's like to know from your childhood that the lives of people close to you depend on you, on how strong you'll be. Such a burden can destroy anyone. You can't just ignore it.
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Next, we're shown how Aegon drinks on Driftmark. And that's a pretty sad sight - several cups in a row, wincing, as if taking a medicine that will help him to feel better.
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Actually, I like the theory that he gets drunk after Aemond says that Helaena is his future queen. Another reminder that he'll have to marry his own sister, for whom he has no feelings. And he drinks because he tries to numb his pain.
The same goes for his obviously unhealthy attitude towards sex - he uses it to numb his loneliness. I believe that Aegon literally didn't have the opportunity to feel what love is in any form. His father disliked him and showed it openly. His mother loved him, but she never knew how to express it the way he needed to. He was married to his sister (the tragedy for both of them) and it was a matter of duty, not feelings. At the time of the first season, Aegon is deeply unhappy and this is obvious. I have every reason to believe that his need for physical intimacy is based on the fact that this is the only form of love he can receive. Considering that Aegon is quite smart, I even think that he himself understands how ugly this form is, but there's nothing he can do. During the act, I guess in some unhealthy way it really saves him from loneliness, longing and the need to be loved, but in the end it makes him even more unhappy.
Then it's impossible not to remember the eighth episode and the famous:
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It's still clear that family is important to him. Yes, he feels like a stranger among his relatives, but it hurts him just because he cares. He cries and says "it will never be enough for you or father" because he wants it to be enough. He still loves them and wants them to love him back.
"What Aegon wants more than anything is to be told by his dad ‘I have faith in your capabilities as a young man. I see you bringing prosperity to King’s Landing.’ But he hasn’t said any of those things. His dad has completely ignored him, in fact, throughout his entire youth." (с) Tom Glynn-Carney for Esquire
Next, we can move on to episode nine and the fact that Aegon ran away. I've seen a lot of opinions that this is an indicator of selfishness and like...what? He was scared. This follows from the script:
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He was scared, he'd never leave his family, much less Sunfyre. It was a decision made in a panic when he realized that his father had died and the moment he had feared all his life had come - he needed to accept the crown to protect his family.
During the conversation in the carriage, we see that Aegon was really hurt that his father didn't love him:
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He even said "because he didn't like me" when talking about his father's attitude towards him. He didn't use the word "love" because it was obvious to him that his father didn't love him. He used the word "like", unknowingly emphasizing that he couldn't count on even simple sympathy.
He's also well aware that Viserys could have named him the heir, but didn't do so simply because he didn't want to and because of this, he - the eldest son, feels unworthy of the throne, and also completely lost.
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When Alicent tells him that Viserys wanted to make him the heir before his death, an emotional dam breaks inside him, it's literally written in the script:
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And at this moment, looking at the dagger, he's not even listening to Alicent, he's completely in his thoughts - maybe, at least for a second, his father cared about him. And when he asks his mother if she loves him, we see how much he craves love, how broken he really is, how important his family is to him.
I know this post is insanely long and I haven't even analyzed the various microexpressions in Tom's acting, but I'm really tired of people wanting to make Aegon something pure evil.
"I also see Aegon as being incredibly complex. He's not an out-and-out psychopath. I see a multilayered character that just has endless potential of pits of vulnerability and empathy and things that we don't see. I think it's his vulnerability that breeds the darkness. It's the way he copes, it's his security, it's his safety blanket, it's an addictive coping mechanism for him to shut things out and to be cold." (с) Tom Glynn-Carney for Entertainment Weekly
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space-blue · 3 months
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A Radical Messmer Theory
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OKAY so hear me out.
I think we're all on top of things regarding how much Marika used to care for Messmer despite the embivalence of their relationship.
On one hand you have the OP healing vials she created for him and him only. You have his love and dedication to her. You have her taking his eye and giving her a seal that both locks the serpent but also hides the fact that he is GRACELESS.
Then you'll have things like how he hates his flame and tried to be rid of it, yet was clearly made to fight with it, in her name. How he wishes for hate and resentment to come to him and not her, yet she seems to have abandoned him.
BUT CONSIDER THIS!!
What if Marika sealed him away to keep him safe?
Because... If you are of the opinion that Marika has orchestrated the entire thing. That she exiled Godfrey and his people asking them to come back stronger because she was laying out a plan... That she hooked Ranni up with numen warriors to engineer Godwyn's death, then broke the Elden Ring purposefully...
And then took her punishment and set out to *wait* for the Tarnished to return and free her from the control of the Elden Beast...
Then it's possible that she veiled Messmer and exiled him to protect him FROM US. From the Shattering War.
After all, we can completely skip the DLC. Killing Mogh is completely optional. And the only reason we enter the shadow realm is because Miquella has discovered something of the gate of divinity and has been cooking up a plan for ages as well.
Miquella got thwarted and has been forced to wait in stasis until someone killed Radahn AND Mogh for ages. The moment he does, we have the opportunity to enter and follow, and because of that we have to kill Messmer.
But Marika's grace leads the way! you argue. Not until a certain point though, and most importantly: once Miquella is on his way to become a god (partially through your actions freeing the tower from shadows) then he becomes someone you need to kill because he's threatening the old order.
Marika is gambling on us, and when Miquella rises, she leads the way towards us defeating him and his consort, and then back to the main purpose.
But there's no reason to go kill Messmer. And if we don't, we can easily stipulate that Miquella's happy go lucky band of misfits also wouldn't have managed to bring him down, trapping Miquella's soul in the of shadows, once more in stasis waiting for a hurdle to be overcome for him.
It makes sense then, that the land of shadows, all considered, is the safest place for one of Marika's children to be. Out of the way. Without a great rune. He protects something she wants to keep secret, but maybe the secret itself protects him.
She sent him on that crusade around the time she married Radagon. Everyone theorises she wanted him out of the way to either have his true nature hidden out of shame or to protect him from backlash at the time, but imo she sent him to seal him away because :
1- she knows he's endlessly loyal and devoted
2- it gets her revenge underway and keeps her secrets
3- it gets Messmer out of the public eye in the moment
4- it keeps Messmer SAFE from the dark shit she's got planned that will wreck the lands between.
The Messmer most beloved son theory! The good Tarnished doesn't play the DLC, or does just long enough to run around but leaves Messmer alive and Miquella forever blue balled.
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jinzkss · 1 month
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Stray kids a-z nsfw
Bangchan
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A - Aftercare
He’s really good with aftercare .You want a sandwich it’s there towels there water There KING OF AFTERCARE
B - Body Part (their favourite body part of theirs and also their partner)
On himself, he loves his hands, specifically his fingers, they’re nice and long and can always get you in all the right places. On his partner he loves their ass
C - Cum
Likes to cum on you, literally anywhere, the messier the better. He’ll just kinda let it go anywhere. He’ll always just kinda sit back and admire his masterpiece for a minute before getting you a towel lol
D - Dirty Secret (a dirty secret of theirs)
Now, it’s not really a secret to you, but he loves to film or photograph the two of you whenever you’re going at it, the more explicit the better. He’ll keep them for his spank bank that he uses whenever he’s away from you for too long lol. It’s the reason why he’s so protective over his phone.
E - Experience
He’s probably way to experienced soo be readyyy
F - Favourite Position
Definitely doggy. He can be free to set the pace as rough as he wants and he gets to watch your ass jiggle as he pounds into you lmao. If not that then he’s always a fan of having you up against the wall.
G - Goofy (are they more serious in the moment, or are they humorous etc)
He’s really not all that goofy in the moment, all his focus is on getting you both off, he’ll kinda just zone out for a little bit, like, all the blood is in his dick not his brain lol. It’s afterwards that he gets all giggly and mushy
H - Hair (how well groomed are they)
I think he’s pretty tidy but there’s still hair there
I - Intimacy (how are they during the moment, romantic aspect)
He is bangchan so he’s gonna be super intimate, even when he’s being pretty rough lmao. Whilst he can be intimate, it’s almost a dark kinda intimacy, like, the atmosphere is very heavy lol he takes this shit seriously. Sex is the best way for him to express his emotions.(also hugs)
J - Jack Off (Masturbation)
I lowkey feel like he’s the type of person to do it every 3-4 days. Even if he’s not particularly in The Mood, it’s pretty much just become a point of his daily routine at this point. Usually he’ll just do it in bed so that he can fall asleep fully relaxed
K - Kinks (one of more of their kinks)
DADDY KINK(disapprove=wrong)
L - Location (Favourite places to do the do)
Just bc of how…intense, he likes to get, he much prefers to keep in in the bedroom. That way you’re both free to do whatever you want and be as loud as your heart desires.
M - Motivation (What turns them on)
I feel like he’s suuuper easy to rile up lmao. Literally anything even vaguely sexual just makes his imagination go wild. He’s one of those people where something so simple as watching you eat anything even vaguely phallic will set him off. You really wouldn’t have to try very hard to get him in the mood lol
N - NO (something they won’t do, turn offs)
Tbh, I dont picture bangchan as being someone with any hard limits, he’s super open to trying anything and will give anything a go once. I feel like maybe he’d be a little insecure about bringing other people into the bedroom, but that’s about it.
O - Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc)
One of the best in skz have you seen those lips
🫦🫦🫦🫦🫦
P - Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc)
He’ll start off a bit slow, but he’ll get much faster as he finds his rhythm. Maybe a little bit on the rougher side, not so much that you wont be able to walk or anything, but you’ll for sure still be feeling it afterwards.
Q - Quickies (Their opinions on quickies rather than proper sex, how often, etc)
He wasn’t always a fan, purely bc they don’t give him the time he needs to be able to go all out. But sometimes they’re the only option. Over time he’s really come to enjoy them, he really finds the kinda frantic needy energy so fun
R - Risk (are they down to experiment, do they take risks?)
He’s TOTALLY down, the riskier the better. As long as there’s no danger of like, lasting injury or anything…illegal, he’s always down to do anything and everything.
S - Stamina (how many rounds can they go, how long do they last? etc)
You’ll for sure be getting more than one round out of bangchan lmao, just bc i feel like he doesn’t really last all that long. It also doesn’t take too long for him to bounce back and be ready to go again lol
T - Toy (do they own toys do they use them on a partner or on themselves?)
He likes them but doesn’t use them very often
U - Unfair (how much they like to tease)
HE. IS. SUCH. A. TEASE. He lives for making you squirm. He’ll whisper the most sinful things to you, or have his and a little too high on your leg in public and watch your face go bright red, just to innocently ask “you okay y/n? you look a little flustered” He’s evil.But if it’s love and not rough sex he will be the most romantic men in bed whispering words like”princess “”baby girl””my queen”(AHAHJSGSJSNHS)
V - Volume (how loud are they, what type of sounds they make)
He’s really not all that loud. Maybe gets a little bit whiny as he gets close to finishing but aside from some drawn out sighs here and there, he’s pretty quiet.
W - Wild Card (a random headcannon)
Whilst he can be super rough and a lil bit on the dominant side, I feel like bangchan has a SUPER hidden submissive side that he keeps firmly locked away. It’s when he’s super tired and worn out that this side of him comes out. He won’t ever be super submissive however, but he’ll get whiny and almost a little bit bratty. He just wants to be taken care of and treated like a prince lmao
X - X-ray (what’s going on inside those pants)
He’s big maybe like 7 or 7.5
Y - Yearning (How high is their sex drive)
Pretty high, he’s always ready to do something; whether thats full on sex or just fooling around, anything. You just have to say the word and he’ll have his trousers down in 0.2 seconds flat.
Z - Zzz… (How quickly they fall asleep afterwards)
Tbh, I feel like he wont be sleeping for quite a while afterwards. He just gets all chatty and giggly, he’ll just wanna stay up and talk about everything.
HELP I DONT LIKE DIS
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very-normal-abt-this · 10 months
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I want talk about how much love was nonverbally expressed *after* their last conversation in S2 Finale.
Yes, you heard right. AFTER.
Sure, they ended the conversation completely pissed at each other. Broken hearted. But, like in any solid relationship, they don't hold grudges. Only a few short moments later, all the anger is gone from Aziraphale's face, and the only emotions left are: love, longing, fear, regret. He can barely pay attention to Metatron, because he keeps looking out the window at Crowley. I think I counted 7 times of him turning his head to look. And of course, he is close to changing his mind several times. (BTW, I would *kill* to know what thoughts were going through his mind right before he committed to leaving, right before he said "nothing at all" with that fake smile)
And Crowley. Most humans, when they feel they've been rejected and/or abandoned - they slam the door and they leave in a huff! They don't look back, they get in their car, and drive away as fast they can, possibly with a middle finger pointed in the direction of the offending party. (Unless they're the type of person who would stand by the door, cry and beg them to stay, but obviously that behavior could never be exhibited by Crowley).
But Crowley does not leave. He does not even try to hide in his car. He stands there, intentionally on display, waiting and watching. Why? Because either A) He is not viewing this as a rejection and abandonment, but as a [huge] difference of opinion, so he is not reacting like someone who has just been rejected. Or B) he IS viewing it as rejection, but he loves Aziraphale so much that his main priority is still to make sure that the Angel is safe, regardless of their current relationship status. His love for Aziraphale is literally unconditional. Crowley wants to watch him walk into that elevator with his own eyes, and make sure that he's not doing so under duress. Or there is option C) He is standing there defiantly, to communicate his disapproval and disbelief at what Aziraphale is doing, like "I can't believe you're actually doing this, I have to see this shit with my own eyes to believe it." Or option D) He is hoping to influence Aziraphale to change his mind, because he knows that its incredibly hard for Aziraphale to leave him. Standing there to send a message of "I'm still here. Are you really sure you are okay with being separated?" Or maybe even E) A small part of him wondered if he (Crowley) might change his own mind about going, once he saw Aziraphale actually walking toward the elevator, once he saw that it's actually happening.
I don't think it's option C because of Crowley's facial expression and body language after Aziraphale gets in the elevator. I don't see any anger, frustration, disgust, or judgment there. All I see is...utter despondency, numbness, melancholy, hopelessness. So, I'm thinking its a combination of reasons A, B, and D. Maybe a little E.
And, I wondered the same about Aziraphale. As he is walking to the elevator, he is not acting as someone who is angry at their significant other. I imagine that a lot of people who feel angry after a fight, and feel their partner is completely in the wrong - they would walk into that elevator without looking back at the offending party. They might put on the happiest face and try to hide all traces of negative emotions, just to "stick it to them." But Aziraphale does look back at Crowley. And, this last nonverbal communication with his partner is also very intentional; he wants Crowley to know that he is looking at him on purpose (just as Crowley's behavior of standing by the Bentley and watching him leave is very intentional). Aziraphale stops and makes eye contact with Crowley, right before he walks into the elevator. Just as Crowley, he is trying to send a message with that pause and look. What message? A) "I can't believe you're not coming with me, I'm hurt and disappointed in you." B) "I want you to know that it's very hard for me to do this, I'm torn about it, and I'm thinking about you." C) "I just found out very bad news and you're in danger." Or option D) "I just found out very bad news and I'm definitely going to need your help. I'll be back."
My opinion is that its a combo of B, C, and D. I do not think its A, based on Aziraphale's behavior and emotions right after Crowley walked out.
So, to summarize the point I am making - despite their deficits in communicating with words, Aziraphale and Crowley continue communicating their feelings nonverbally. They remain committed to each other, even in the face of the biggest rift they've ever experienced in their relationship. Their behavior shows that their first priority in the relationship is not "to be right" or "to win the argument." Their priorities are - taking care of each other. Letting each other know that, "no matter what happens, I am here, and I'm thinking about you."
Thanks for reading! please leave a comment.
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i. don’t really know what to think about the whole forever situation. because i have seen people say “he’s addressed this a long time ago so why are we bringing it up” but i haven’t seen WHERE he’s addressed it in the past. nary a tweet or clip of anywhere he may have talked about it, but i would love to see an older clip of him talking about this if possible
I’ve seen people say “his tweets and messages were translated in bad faith to give english speakers a bad perception” which. ok yeah understandable but if that’s the case i still don’t know what exactly the situation is or how serious it is
“she was 13” “she was 15” OK WHICH IS IT!!! both are bad but one is still significantly grosser than the other and i don’t know which is true!! or are there multiple girls!!! i don’t know!!!
“he met a fan for flirtatious/sexual reasons” “he met a fan for normal content creator reasons” WHICH IS IT!!!! I DON’T KNOW!!! i guess only he and the fan would know what the intent was when they met, and even then i don’t know if they met alone or if it was a normal ass fan meetup with multiple other people there
“it’s been 7-8 years, he’s changed” ok. now we are making some sense. he has not exhibited this kind of behaviour in years it seems and he appears to be the kind of person who would not say or do these things now. no one is irredeemable and no one is beyond change. still, it is important for some people to know. many fans would rather know this and make the educated choice on whether to support him or not than continue to support him in blind blissful ignorance. even though it’s stressing me out and i’m still clueless about a lot of it, i’m glad i know anyway.
“what about the past transphobia and the ableism and the and the and the-” That Is Not Relevant To This Conversation. this is a different situation. he has apologized for his past opinions and everyone has had ample time to come to terms with them and make peace with supporting him despite his past beliefs.
“he’s deleting past tweets” i mean if someone was digging around my account for things i’ve said that i no longer stand by, i would delete shit too. sure as hell doesn’t make him look innocent but i would do the same. i HAVE done the same, albeit for much more minor and trivial reasons for posts i made when i was like 15, but still
“he apologized and said he’s getting a lawyer!! no guilty person would do that!!” your content creator is not an angel. guilty people take their accusers to court all the time and get away with it. also, it is up to everyone individually to decide whether to believe him or not. you cannot push others to believe your side but you can give context to some things
there’s nuance to this like there is with everything, and people are jumping to conclusions saying either “he’s an innocent little lamb how dare you!” or “he should be deplatformed and we should never speak of him again!” i will never fault anyone for supporting the alleged victim. if your decision is to stop watching him immediately or even stop supporting the qsmp itself, no one should ever fault you for that. it is ultimately up to you to make that decision. the situation is not clear enough for me to make a decision, so i will withhold judgement for now. i will not doompost about it, and i will not call out people for defending or dropping him.
but for the love of god, just. everybody keep your cool. especially english speakers, we may not have full proper translations for the messages and tweets. take a deep breath. if you want to find more info to form an opinion now and spread information that people don’t already have, go ahead. if you want to step back and not think about it for now, go ahead. there is no shame in taking a step back and thinking about other things. you are not morally obligated to be invested in this situation. you are not morally obligated to drop him immediately and you are also not morally obligated to keep supporting him just because he’s friends with your favs. stick to your gut and do what you feel is right. you will be okay. this is not the end of the world.
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