#the feeling of something being Deeply Wrong

[astrologiayadumu]

Part two a)

As someone who went to a girl's high school, I’ve learned a lot about the personalities of different astrological signs/aspects so these are some of my observations :

1. 3H Mars - Riot grrlsss - I mean the people who are always ready to start a riot ( or strike as we call it in my country) at any minor inconvenience by the school. The rebellious types who never followed school rules. Also you can't do anything secretly, every action you take or anything you do is talked about.

2. 12H moons - always in some drama.Always has all the tea about everything and everyone in school.

3. 8H moons - Know a lot of secret things that go on that nobody knows about. They rarely tell tho, you have to be tight.

4. 10H/ 1H Mercury - known for their words/what they say. Good luck spilling secrets or being a gossiper with this one. Everyone will know what you said.

5. Jupiter in the 9H - deeply religious. Will always be involved in religious activities in school. Very strict and serious about their beliefs.

6. Scorpio risings tend to be really short.

7. Lilith in the 1H- Hottest in the room. makes other girls uncomfortable once they express their sexual side. Like twerking when music is being played( other people do the same but they don't receive the same reaction). The silent stares and judgment are extreme. It’s probably jealousy but people do a lot to shame them. Since its a girl's school, a lot of girls want to try you out. ( this needs its own post there is so much to say)

8. Taurus suns -least likely to like school food.

9.Aquarius Mars- social media influencers. Always up to date with trends. Also those people who everyone I the school knows and follows their socials.

10. Venus in the 5H - generous with their items more than most.

11. Leo suns carry themselves like royalty. It's funny sometimes when no one takes them seriously💀 Very big personalities can be too much sometimes. They’re very regal tho in their demeanor. Most likely to join the school pageant (and win)

12. Moon in the 2H - make having money their entire personality. Will tend to respect people according to how rich their family is like a religion. Never broke tho.

13. Lilith in the 10H/6H - everyone wants you but can't have you unless you want them first.

14. Lots of Leo energy, like being a. Leo rising, Leo degrees, - extreme attention seeking. Oh you will not have peace until you give them your attentions.

15. Pisces suns are too scared to live without any form of religion or spiritual belief. They are very indifferent to irreligious people. They pray before doing anything.

16. Best dancers- Gemini mars and Sagittarius mars.

17. Capricorn moons are so focused on their life goals. Will never waste time on something that’s not beneficial to them. Like if everyone is doing something just to pass the time or out of idleness they'd rather read or do something constructive. Their parents are so strict about their grades.

18. Sun conjunct Lilith- I’m sorry you just can't do anything shady and get away with it. Everybody talks and points out your sins. They never let them slide. Tends to be the outcasts in their classes. (not social class) You also can't participate in drama or beef like everyone else when it blows over you're the only one who will be crucified. Very rebellious energy tho, rubs teachers the wrong way. People fell its easiest to pick on you the most because everyone naturally doesn't like you. ( I'm not trying to be mean, sorry)

19. Mars in the 5H - like to fight. Not someone people like to provoke always 2 seconds from throwing a punch.

20. Mars in the 2H - eat a lot. We used to share food communally and you guys were a problem to your table members.

21. Lilith in the 2H - people feel like they deserve your possessions. Like someone would borrow money from you and feel offended if you ask for it back. Or if they want something instead of getting it themselves would feel obliged to take yours instead. On the bright side, people give you things easily, and people who don't have the same luck as you may try to make you feel guilty.

22. Mars in the 7H/Libra Mars- love coming in between two people who get along and causing disharmony. It stems from jealousy tho because they can't seem to get along with anyone without constant conflict. The literal definition of ‘I hate peace I want problems always’

23. Mars in the 12H- you're secretly the bad guy in people subconscious. I don't mean to be harsh but you secretly piss people off. Also you're constantly thinking of hurting others( i won't generalize tho) Sign and degree matters. I think it is some sort of karma.

24. Lilith in the 4H - have a bad relationship to their boobs but they're still very sexualized and considered attractive by others.

[storygremlin]

Okay, for very real I need everyone acting like Colin didn’t “suffer enough” or whatever to take a breath and like…I dunno, rethink how u treat ur friends or something.

Like, Penelope’s feelings being hurt about the comment he made at the end of S2 is so real, but also her forgiving him as soon as he genuinely apologizes and follows through on being a solid friend is what friendship is??? Have none of you ever been accused by random people you only kinda know about being into ur close friends just bc ur opposite genders and then doing that panicky defense thing where you laugh really loud and go “what r u even saying dude? Hahaha that’s ridiculous they’re my bestie we are The Most Platonic (tm)” just to get them to leave u alone?

Does Colin overcompensate? Yes. Is it understandable, especially given the information we have about Penelope’s feelings, that she feels hurt and made fun of? Also yes. But very obviously, he wasn’t trying to make fun of her because he didn’t know how she felt. Very obviously, he loves talking to her and spending time with her. Very obviously, he values her opinion of him. He just didn’t want other people implying things about their friendship, specifically because it’s so important to him. If it wasn’t important to him, he wouldn’t have kept writing her even when she wasn’t writing him back. He wouldn’t have followed her out of that ball and tried to figure out what was wrong. He wouldn’t have sought her out in her garden, listened to her explanation, and offered his help despite the risk to their reputations. And he wouldn’t have quickly forgiven her snooping in his private journal and smiled so bashfully when she complimented his writing.

And when he realizes he’s in love with her he gives her the choice. He risks being so deeply vulnerable, kneels in front of her, and says, “I need you, I crave you, this is torture but I want it cause it’s you, do you want me?” And he’s fully ready to back off when he thinks she’s rejecting him. That’s respect.

Friends to lovers isn’t friends to lovers if they’re punishing each other over mistakes or lack of communication.

Friends to lovers is only good when there’s inherent love and trust and a desire to understand, support, and forgive each other pulling people together. Not despite themselves. If you want love despite themselves watch S2. Friends to lovers is love because. Because they’ll talk things out. Because they’ll try to encourage and forgive. Because they’ll do whatever is necessary to keep it good. Its love because of themselves. Because they value and love each other enough to keep trying.

That’s friendship bitch. And I love theirs.

[absolutehomosexuals]

Astarion's ascension is extremely popular, despite it clearly being the designed bad ending for him.

So many fans of this version want to argue that it's a "valid" path to choose if you enjoy his character, or that it's equally good as his Spawn ending. The "it's what he wants" argument is the hegemonic justification in question.

But is wanting something better than needing another thing? Yes, he talks about ascension ever since he finds out about the ritual.

Yes, when push comes to shove he's still committed to ascend. But is this enough? Should we support his choice, even when everything but his words tell us not to? Should we trust the judgment of a deeply traumatized man about the best way for him to feel better?

This may sound harsh, but the answer is no.

Because in many circumstances, we see Astarion behaving unhealthily as a result of his trauma: he's hypersexual at the beginning of the game, using sex as a survival mechanism. He's yet to learn what his boundaries should be, what it means not to be an object, to see himself as a person that deserves respect and has so much more to offer than just his body. His trauma is still fresh. And he's so scared of losing his freedom, being trapped under slavery again.

We can't blame him being so desperate to feel safe that he will trade everything he is for it.

Because that's what the ritual means, Cazador says so himself: despite gaining the ritual's power, Astarion is still part of the bargain for said power. He still loses his soul in the process, and that is clear once we see how he acts post-ascension.

Of course, someone that is still suffering from the consequences of 200 years of abuse wouldn't care if he became less of himself, in the process of becoming untouchable ever again. Astarion's behaviour towards himself highlights that he doesn't care for the person he is because that person is, sadly, the product of those centuries of abuse.

He doesn't want to be that person anymore: even better, he doesn't want to be a person anymore: people suffer, people get taken advantage of, people are submitted by more powerful beings. He is willing to give this up not despite losing everything he is, but because of it. And that's what happens after his ascension: he retains his body, which becomes an empty shell of who he once was, with someone else inside of it to fill the void left by his soul.

This situation is a perfect, brutal metaphor of an abused person that later in life becomes the abuser himself, a thing that often happens to male victims of SA.

This is what is fundamentally wrong with Astarion's ascension: he's choosing power, his abuser's tool, over healing. Instead of learning to feel like a person again, to deal with his trauma to life after having endured it, he chooses to not feel anymore, while letting thousands of spawns (like he was) be consumed to get what he wants.

This terribly selfish act is the first instance of Astarion behaving like Cazador, considering the spawns as lesser beings, as nothing but his tools, like all vampire lords do. In this process he also sees himself, the person he gives up being, as a tool. He isn't healing. He's losing all of himself entirely.

Why would someone see this sacrifice as not only necessary to leave his trauma behind, but also preferable to healing from it?

The fan-favourite characteristic of Ascended Astarion is his behaviour towards Tav: in this version of "himself", he clearly is even more sexual than he was in his first days with the tadpole. And this expression of his sexuality is drastically different from the one we got to know prior to this point.

He is dominant, prevaricating, demanding in his avances: he enjoys being in a position of power even in his relationship.

This isn't the Astarion that slowly learns to trust his partner, to build a real loving relationship with someone who sees him as equal and truly cares for him.

Everything that he learns during his romance and his plot gets nullified by his ascension; and yet, this gets overlooked in favour of this more sexually appealing version of him. For people that claim to love his character because of his complexity, Ascended Astarion fans seem to only truly love him when he's less of himself than ever.

When all that's left of him is his body, and he behaves more like the toxic love interest from a young adult romance book, a great number of his fans get wild. Is this all that they want from him? The husk of the funny, sarcastic, dramatic and complex character, filled with this more traditionally masculine attitude, replacing what he used to be? An Astarion that never heals from his trauma, choosing to leave behind everything he was instead? Who resembles his abuser more than ever?

Do his fans who like his ascended version so much to genuinely think this is the best outcome for him, or do they just enjoy being able to project this "macho" fantasy on a physically attractive male character, that otherwise isn't anything like this prototype of man?

We can't help but think that appreciating Ascended Astarion is the same as believing in, if not loving, his hypersexual facade: it's overlooking his humanity in favour of sexualising him.

Which is the biggest disservice one could ever do to his character.

[livyjh]

The Incident

Joel Miller x AFAB!Reader (non-specific size/shape/skin color/gender terms)

Rating: EXPLICIT 18+

Word count: 1.7k

Summary: you live with Joel and Ellie in Jackson. Ellie has been spending a lot of time outside the house lately, leaving you and Joel alone. One day he walks in on you naked and things couldn’t be the same after. Smut ensues.

Warnings: smut (duh), embarrassing situation, unprotected p-in-v (wrap it!), awkwardness with Joel, making out, strip tease.

A/N: I’M BACK, BABY!! I know it’s been forever since I posted a fic. Life has been actually fucking insane and I was just unmotivated for a long time. This isn’t my best work, as I’m just getting back on the bandwagon, but I hope to be creating, writing, and posting more often from now on! I miss you guys. Please send me messages of encouragement or anon notes or whatever if you feel like it! I could use it!

Joel Miller Masterlist

****************************************************

Joel didn’t know why, but he couldn’t stop thinking about you.

Actually… that wasn’t true. He knew exactly why.

The other day he’d walked in on you coming out of the shower. He could’ve sworn he heard you walk to your bedroom. He was wrong.

So there you were, one foot in the tub, the other on the little rug outside the bath. Completely naked. Dripping wet. Skin, hot.

The first thing he looked at was your chest. He’d never been oblivious to your body, but out of respect he’s always just tried not to look too much.

Then he looked right back up into your horrified eyes and slammed the door shut, him on one side, you on the other.

“Joel!” You scolded nervously.

“I’m sorry, darlin’. Thought you’d gone to your room already. I just need to piss. I- uh- I’ll go downstairs.” Joel cleared his throat and shook his head before leaving you alone with your racing thoughts and rapid heartbeat.

You finished stepping out of the tub before grabbing your towel and throwing it over your head. You scrunched your hair with it before throwing your hands over your face. You groaned loudly into the towel, embarrassed.

You’d always had this fleeting, tiny crush on Joel. Nothing serious, but there were some times when he’d smile, or the light would hit his eyes just right, or when he stretched his back and groaned softly before letting out a soft exhale… those were the times you cherished being around him.

He was attractive. No question about it.

You were attractive. Also no question there.

You were a confident person, someone who tried to not care what other people thought. You were almost thankful for the apocalypse because now there weren’t any magazines or programs forcing you to look a certain way for society.

Society doesn’t really exist anymore, so, fuck it.

***

The day and a half following the incident was awkward. You and Joel barely talked to each other, much less looked each other in the eyes.

Finally though, Joel said something when it was just you and him sitting at the dining room table, eating.

“I’m really sorry about-“

You cut him off, knowing exactly what he was going to say. “No, you’re fine.” You laugh, a little nervous. “Just trying to remember the last time someone even saw me naked.” You snort.

“Oh.” Joel half smiles, almost sympathetic.

There’s a long pause while Joel hypes himself up to flirt with you.

“It’s been awhile since I’ve seen someone naked… so, uh-“ his nerves are getting the better of him.

“Did you like what you saw, at least?” You help him out.

He gulps, nodding slowly. He gives a smile with a hint of cockiness. “Yeah.”

“I think it’s only fair I get to see you naked now.” You wink.

Joel blushes deeply, looking down at his nearly empty plate.

“Come on. Tit for tat, as they say.” You giggle.

Joel chuckles too and it makes your heart beat a little faster. “Let’s go upstairs.”

You bite your lip and nod, Joel surprising you by grabbing your hand. He leads you upstairs and to his room before closing the door.

You’re eager, walking to the bed before sitting down and putting your hands in your lap. “Alright, get on with it.” You laugh quietly.

Joel walks over to the bed, standing in front of you with soft eyes. He keeps eye contact as he slowly reaches up to the top button on his flannel. He pops it open and suddenly you feel a warmth wash over you.

This was happening. Joel fucking Miller is basically giving you a strip tease show.

You bite your lip as you watch him, your focus switching between his hands and his face.

He keeps going with the buttons, one at a time, slower than you wanted, but you could handle it.

Once the last button was undone, he opened his shirt and shrugged it off. You took in the sight of his bare torso. You studied the small scars on his body, eyes tracing the slightly toned lines of his chest and stomach.

“Not bad at all.” You grinned.

“May I continue?” He raised a brow and licked his lips.

“By all means.” You breathe the words, squeezing your thighs together.

He started to pay attention to your body now, too. His eyes roamed down to your chest, not missing the sight of your thighs rubbing against each other.

“Getting wet already?” He teased.

You let out a small moan before meeting his eyes and nodding.

“Good.” He reached down to the button on his jeans, letting it loose before unzipping his fly. You were paying close attention to his hands, noticing he was quickly hardening in his pants.

Your mouth was almost watering as you watched. His thumbs stuck into the top of his jeans before he pushed them down his legs and stepped out of them.

His boxer briefs were a dark blue, with a gray waistband. His cock was straining the fabric, a little wet spot beginning to form.

“Fuck.” You cursed, reaching down between your legs to relieve some pressure.

“Not gonna let me do that for you?” Joel hummed.

“Please, y- yes.” You sighed and laid back on the bed.

Joel got between your legs, looming over you. You could feel the heat coming off his body as he finally leant down to kiss you for the first time.

You sighed happily against his lips, reaching up to put both your hands in the hair on the back of his head.

He relaxed himself a little, his hips meeting yours. He was only wearing underwear and you were unfortunately still dressed, but when he rolled his hips-

“Joel-!” You gasped, wrapping your legs around him, feeling riled up beyond belief.

“What do you need, honey?” He cooed.

“Need… need you to fuck me.”

“What do you say?”

“Please.” You whispered.

“S’right.” He nodded and kissed you again before sitting back on his knees. He reached forward and hooked his fingers in your shorts and your underwear, pulling them both off in one swift movement.

“Take off your shirt, baby.” Joel smiled.

You nodded and grabbed the hem of your shirt, pulling it off to reveal your bare chest.

“No bra today?” He asked with a smirk.

“No bra most days.” You shrugged.

He smiled in response, leaning down to press his lips to your neck.

You shivered and dug your heels into his ass to try and get him to grind against you. It didn’t take much convincing.

He started to roll his hips down against yours as he kissed up and down your neck, trailing his kisses down to your chest. He covered your left nipple with his warm mouth and began to suck softly.

You let out a whine and tangled your fingers in his hair, pulling as your body transcended to another plane of being.

You hadn’t felt this good in so long. You could hardly remember the last time you had sex. Probably because it didn’t feel anything like this. You were breathing heavy, pussy dripping with wetness, surely making a wet spot on Joel’s underwear.

It felt amazing but you couldn’t wait much longer for the main event. “Joel, I- please. Please, baby.”

“I know… need it so bad, huh?” He looked up at you, moving to take off his boxers quickly.

“Yeah.” You breathed, heart racing with anticipation.

You looked down at his bare cock, jaw almost dropping at the sight. He was long and thick, the head a beautiful shade of reddish pink, leaking.

He stroked himself a couple of times as he got into a comfortable position between your legs, which were now wrapped around his waist.

“Ready?” Joel asked kindly.

“As ever.” You nodded and kissed him.

He lined up easily before starting to push himself into your core.

Joel’s cock was definitely made for you. It felt so good as it slid between your pussy lips, your juices coating him and making it easier for him to enter you.

“Fuck…” you moaned when he had pushed in all the way. It didn’t hurt, but you were gonna need a minute to adjust.

“Start slow.” You smiled against his lips.

“Whatever you want.” He hummed and kissed you again, starting to slowly pull out until your labia was only wrapped around the head of his cock.

He thrusted slowly like this a few times before he felt you relax around him. “Feel good?”

“So fucking good, Joel.” You nodded and dug your nails into his shoulders as he sped up.

He pressed his face into your neck, lips against your collarbone when you said something.

“Harder.” You pleaded.

“Harder?” He asked, clarifying.

“Harder.” You whined, body tingling.

“I gotcha, baby.” Joel moved his hands under your back, pressing himself into you for more leverage.

He started pounding into you at a fast pace, grunting with each thrust.

“Yes yes yes!” You yelled out, toes curling.

“You gonna cum for me, sweetie?” He growled.

“Yeah! Ohhh…” your breathing stuttered as you felt your orgasm quickly approaching.

His cock was hitting your g-spot with every movement and it was almost enough to drive you crazy. But in the best way.

“I’m cumming. Oh, fuck. I’m cumming!” You gasped and then let out multiple whimpers as the waves of your orgasm washed over you.

You squeezed around Joel and he couldn’t hold back any longer, shooting hot ropes of cum against your cervix.

“Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.” He cursed with each breath as you both melted into each other completely.

His hips began to hurt and he finally slowed down, pulling out of you. He sat back and put his hands on your knees, keeping your legs spread.

Joel watched his cum leak out of you and onto his mattress as you caught your breath.

“Come here.” You reached for him with both arms.

He moved up the bed and pulled you into his chest, kissing your forehead.

“That felt so good, Joel.” You smiled up at him. “I feel good with you.”

He nodded, “I feel the same.”

You looked into his eyes for a moment before leaning up to kiss him sweetly. “Ready for round two?”

[jiarkives]

you’ll be safe here

⋆.˚ ᡣ𐭩 .𖥔˚ summary — with you, he can just be himself. not the strongest jujutsu sorcerer, not the honored one, not anyone the world expected him to be.

⋆.˚ ᡣ𐭩 .𖥔˚ content — hurt/comfort

⋆.˚ ᡣ𐭩 .𖥔˚ notes — ending was kinda wack but it is what it is 🫣 also, the title is from an opm song

~

From the moment he walked through the front door of your shared home, you knew something was wrong. The heavy sigh he let out as soon as he was inside was enough to tell you that, but there was more. So much more.

His blindfold was hanging loosely around his neck. His hair was unkempt and messy like he had run his fingers through them more times than he can count on both hands. His usually bright, blue eyes are dull, lacking the sparkle in them. And if you looked closely, you could see how his hands trembled.

“I’m home,” he greeted, his voice quiet and almost bland as he practically collapsed on the couch.

You did not speak, opting to sit beside him on the couch wordlessly, close enough for him to reach for you, but not close enough to touch him. You did not want to overwhelm him more than he already was. You wanted to go at his own pace.

After a few minutes of silence, you finally spoke, your voice still quiet, “Do you want to talk about it?”

He did not respond, the silence stretching out even longer, but you let him. You let him lay on the couch, almost unmoving when he finally spoke, “Can you hold me?”

It wasn’t the answer to your question, but it was an answer you were hoping for, so just as silently as you were since he got home, you moved closer to him slowly. You reached out tentatively, your fingers ghosting over his shoulder clad in his usual long sleeves before you finally, finally touched him. You rubbed his shoulders shortly before your arms snakes around his shoulders, pulling him closer to you.

His head immediately found its way to the crook of your neck, inhaling your scent before exhaling shakily, causing you to shiver slightly. Only when his face was burrowed deeply into your neck and he was hidden away from the world did he break.

His tears started falling silently at first, wetting your skin and your shirt. Then, his sobs followed almost immediately and soon enough, he was crying into your neck like the child he failed to be, while your arms wrapped around him tighter as you whispered assurances into his ear, like how a mother would to her child.

You let him cry everything out, biting your own tears back.

You did nothing but soothe him as he cried his heart out and you can only hope that his burdens were somehow eased with every tear that fell from his eyes.

And even when his tears had stopped and his cries were reduced to mere hiccups, you still held him tightly. You held him as you led him to your shared bedroom, into your bed. You held him as you laid on the bed, wide awake as he slept his worries away. You held him when the nightmares plagued his dreams, waking him up and sending him into tears yet again. You held him throughout the night until the sun rose above the horizon.

And when the new day arrived, only then did you let go. When the new day arrived, he never apologized for being vulnerable in front of you. He never did anymore. He never felt guilty for not being able to keep up with his usual façade around you anymore and you have never felt happier to know that he can truly feel safe around you.

[domreader-headcannon-scenarios]

If you’re willing could you maybe write a little thing (idk the word for it sorry 😭) about replaced God MC getting annoyed with Gabriel and choosing to get energy from Michellel instead??

Yes! I love this, I was thinking of cucking em with lower demons but it would get their heads turning if you chose one of them!

(I really hope you like it I feel like I messed it up!)

Wrong Move (Gabriel)

Cw: technically c*cking?, pining, one sided relationship, angel energy exchange, slight edge play,

-

Gabriel knew you wouldn’t forgive him easily for…branding you…liking your best friend and charging a war against Hell, then kidnapping you…

Gabriel sighs as he watches you tremble as Michael Carrie’s you to your room for some…angel energy….he wished you’d give him a chance! He’s gotta be better! No angel has done…such activities until you came around so they all have the same experience level…

It hurt since it wasn’t just once…this is the with time…it irked him to know you chose the cry baby to him…he could hear his whimpers and moans…it made his heart ache…

He thought about the brand marking he left on you, it hurt to know…he scared your perfect vessel. But…you gave him no chance to make it up, he could heal it! But…you ordered him to deal with and live with the scars there…

He whimpers as he hears Michael moaning loudly, enjoying himself with you…Gabriel had gotten so upset he even tried peeking in in you two a few times.

Each time Michael just…was so obedient, only doing as you say…even letting you edge him.

“A-aah! M-my Lord…I’m close! Please have mercy!”

Gabriel paused, he’s never heard Michael sound like that, he’s never seen him look like that…

Gabriel’s own body heated up at the thought often of you doing this to him…he can feel his cock throbbing in its cage and as he glances towards the other angels groin, he notices…the lack of a chastity cage….

His eyes widen realizing you took off Michael’s cage.

He sobs in frustration quietly, leaving, trembling in a mix of embarrassment and frustration. He needs to make this up to you…

~

The next day you wake up to Gabriel having made you breakfast. He has your clothes laid out and is smiling to you. “My Lord, I’m sorry…I’ve been very…dare I say inappropriate.”

Gabriel sighs and looks away trying to think of what to say.

“Have I said before? That I love you, I deeply value you and will do all I can to protect my Lord…” Gabriel leans forwards and rest his forehead on yours. “Please, please Master…let me heal the wound I have you, I’m sorry…I regret it.”

You barely seem bothered, making him feel wounded, his smile falters but he gets his hopes up when you brush his hair to the side so you can look in his eyes.

“Gabriel. I knew you were watching.”

Gabriel freezes and lowers his gaze. “I-I’m sorr-“

You interrupt him. “Don’t be a brat, I’m not going to chose you next time because your pride wants it…”

You grab his halo and yank it so he flops on the bed, landing beside you. Gabriel looks to you in surprise but since you don’t key go of his halo he decides to behave and stay down. He looks up to you nervously.

“Maybe next time I’ll let you sit in the room, gagged and tied up so you can sit back and enjoy the sight without bothering us.” You coldly tease, leaning over you pluck a feather from Gabriel’s wings. “Get Michael. I need some more energy.”

Gabriel whimpered as you let go of his halo.

“M-Master please give me a chance! I will prove myself to you! I’ll do anything you want! My entire being is just for your pleasure!” He pleaded…you hated his desperate tantrums whenever you decline him something like this. “Once chance is all I’m asking for please…”

As you sit up on the bed he gets on the ground on your side of the bed and gets on his knees and bow, his head on the ground as he bows to you. You know it’s a sign of respect but you grin and place a foot on his head, pushing his face against the ground.

“What a whiny bitch you are…now get Michael and I’ll let you watch.”

Gabriel held back a whimper and hurried away, trying to hid the tears in his eyes from your rejection…he’s sure he can make it up later…just not now…

[painted-bees]

Since I've been rotating Raf's mental illness in my mind this month as a way of smoothing my own brain, I've been thinking a lot about the ways his PPD and CPTSD symptoms interact, and how it affects his behaviors.

Firstly, Raf's paranoia isn't commonly accompanied by narcissistic traits. That is to say--he's not especially prone to believing that people have him on their mind all the time. If he walks past two people laughing, it's not his gut instinct to think that they are laughing at him. However, it is certainly his gut instinct to assume that they are laughing at someone.

But, unless they deliberately pause to regard him in an off putting way, his brain isn't gonna jump to the conclusion that he's the topic of their little chortle.

In fact, Raf rarely feels like he is being deliberately belittled by honest remarks when they are simply worded poorly. In some ways, he greatly prefers being called a jackass, to his face, in flat tones--than to receiving sweet, placating platitudes in a kindly tone. No matter how genuine the kindness may be behind the latter, Raf generally tends to interpret it...poorly. It gives him a really bad gut feeling, like they're buttering him up, mincing their words in a shallow attempt to gain his good opinion...all so that he won't suspect them later. Suspect them of what? Who knows. Something bad, something exploitative, something abusive. To him.

Raf doesn't suspect that everyone is out to use or exploit him. He fully believes that most people are capable of not thinking about him at all--even if he is physically present around them, such as in a busy train station. However, he does suspect that everyone who goes out of their way to interact with him, and especially everyone who wants to get to know him only do so in order to use or exploit him. And his basal understanding of human behavior is, generally, that kindness and good manner are most frequently used as tools of manipulation for personal gain rather than as an expression of genuine love and care. And he recognizes that this is only possible as a successful tool of manipulation because, just like him, everyone else wants to be genuinely loved and cared for.

Even his uncle, whom Raf does genuinely loves and trust, is suspected of being as kind and accommodating as he is to Raf only because doing so soothes his uncle's guilt and gives him a moral leg up over the rest of Raf's family. And part of Raf's initial willingness to trust his uncle is that his uncle never really...denies that this is, at the very least, a part of it. And--if that's all Uncle Bill really wanted outta Raf, then that was a perfectly livable arrangement.

Raf's CPTSD, on the other hand, generates the shame that serves as the crux for a lot of his self-critical introspection. Even before his diagnosis, he was harboring a sense that something was really, deeply wrong with him--like he wasn't a real person. And so, it felt radically audacious to assert that he deserved to behave as a real person; which included the right to feel and act upon anger and sadness--and to have those emotions received and treated with any level of respect by those around him. Until his final year at Juilliard, he was kind of in a placid(listless) state of learned helplessness. He'd do what ever he had to do to meet the expectations of his peers and instructors (namely, amphetamines. So much amphetamines.) It was just baaarely enough to get him his degree, and it ran him ragged and beyond resentful. He fully left Juilliard with the mindset of "I'm entering my villain era, I'm fully committed to being a Bad Guy, I am ok with everyone hating me now". And the "bad guy" behavior was just...saying no to stuff he didn't want to do, self-isolating, and outwardly expressing/lashing out when something viscerally upset him.

Which...thanks to the personality disorder, meant he became prone to yelling at people and accusing them of hurting or betraying him when they, in fact, did not. Especially...almost specifically the people closest to him, who cared the most about him and whom he cared the most for. And that's quickly what lead to his diagnosis, which kinda put an end to his 'villain arch'. So now he's back to reckoning with that sense of "something is really, deeply wrong with me", but at least now he has a growing understanding of what that is. And also the notion of "I have the 'bad person' disease--I am a Bad Person if I act on my core suspicions and beliefs, I cannot fucking trust myself, I can't trust my own perception of people or events." And now he's gotta balance that with whole "I deserve to feel safe, comfortable, and respected" alongside the critical notion of "but so does everyone else".

He hates it when people try to get to know him, he is fundamentally mistrustful of people. But at the same time, he has a lot of difficulty balancing his boundaries against the infringement of other people's boundaries--and the root understanding of "Something is wrong with me, I'm the problem, the fact that I think other people are the problem--is part of the problem that is me." is what motivates him to delay acting upon his negative impulses as much as is is able to, and to exercise kindness even when it feels like he's walking directly into a fire.

So, his overall kinda...thing is "I don't trust any of these guys, they clearly want something from me, and if I let them get close enough, they won't care if they have to hurt me to get it[PPD] but I'm a fundamentally busted person with a fucked up perspective and thus it is actually safer if I prioritize their comfort over my own[CPTSD] within certain parameters[therapy]"

and, idk...the big flashing red "ISOLATE, ISOLATE, ISOLATE" sign shows up in there on a frequent enough occasion that he just...has no real friends, despite a billion "good" acquaintances.

Despite all his mistrust and suspicions, the feelings of being fundamentally unlovable for willfully/protectively limiting the range of his 'usefulness', his terminally pessimistic outlook on the nature of human beings--he craves so tremendously to be loved and cared for and held and reassured in such a way and to such an extent that could never be fully sated, I am sure. But he couldn't stand to receive it from someone he can't believe in.

Margie accidentally hack speedran his CPTSD coping mechanisms so hard that she clipped through his paranoia until the collision error launched her into Trusted Person status. And he's just mostly confused and a bit anxious over how it all happened so fast.

[that's a joke...kinda]

[berrygoodjob]

PLEASE I NEED MORE TOKYO DEBUNKER PERVERT HC I’M GONNA GO CRAZY THE FANDOM IS SO NEW THERE’S PRACTICALLY NOTHING 😞😞😞😞

Mdni 18+

Pervert!TD hcs

Ft: Yuri, Haru, Rui, Ritsu, Romeo

Yuri Isami

—pervert!Yuri who is a MASSIVE tsundere, but accidentally mutter how badly he’d like to strap you to his medical table

—pervert!Yuri definitely thinks you’re using some sort of psychological mind games to make him want you as desperately as he does

—pervert!Yuri who will sneak peaks during his exams and scold you for being careless. He gets very embarrassed if you catch him and might leave the rest of the exam to Jiro

—pervert!Yuri who definitely insists that the hand restraints are necessary during your check ups, just in case….. and will be fucking his fist so desperately the second he’s home

—pervert!Yuri who is so tired, and your body looks so soft and nice, like the ideal stress ball for him to just hold or squeeze

Haru Sagara

—pervert!Haru who checks out your ass every time you see him, and might even brush a hand past it “by accident”

—pervert!Haru who brings you around semi-dangerous anomalies just keep an arm around you and have an excuse to pull you close to him. He will be smelling your hair though.

—pervert!Haru who remembers the smell of your hair, the feeling of your waist and the little gasp you let out when he pulled you closer at the most inconvenient times (middle of class, trying to advertise for the park, and when he’s running away from Taiga). Very poor times for him to get rock hard,,,

—pervert!Haru whose feelings and odd behaviors are noticed by Towa. So next time you head to Jabberwok, it just happens to start pouring rain all over your white t-shirt. Towa smiles and shrugs at you, but gives Haru a wink and a knowing smile.

—pervert!Haru who insists stretching is a must before going out and about around Javberwok (he’s not wrong, but he won’t be stretching as much as he’ll be watching you stretch and imagining all the positions he’d like to have you in) He will jokingly offer to help you stretch, but if you take him up on it, he’ll get too nervous

Rui Mizuki

—pervert!Rui who gets very frustrated knowing that he can’t touch you for real

—pervert!Rui who keeps his distance but will watch you, not intending to be creepy, but then he sees you bend over to pick up something you dropped. He will be undressing you with his eyes in that moment

—pervert!Rui who went to go find you at the cathedral once, but you weren’t home. Although a pair of your dirty underwear was right on top in your laundry pile. He looks at it and sighs deeply. He swears he’s better than that and walks past……. but he goes back and stuffs it in his pocket. After all, it is the closest he’ll be able to get without fear of killing you..

—pervert!Rui who plays with his dick keeping your underwear pressed to his face. He knows it’s a violation of your privacy, but he so desperately wants you, and this is the only way he can even get close

—pervert!Rui who would love nothing more than to be inside of you, but understands how unlikely it is due to both of you being cursed. he still holds hope nonetheless.

Ritsu Shinjo

—pervert!Ritsu who had no idea how deeply his desire for you would hit him and was fully unprepared it.

—pervert!Ritsu who finds himself listening to every recording of your voice, and whose mind starts wander to how you’d sound calling his name. And from there it gets very perverted very quickly,,,, he is shocked at himself, but he knows fantasizing in itself isn’t a crime… so what’s the harm…

—pervert!Ritsu who will want to fuck you and record the audio

—pervert!Ritsu who knows better than to cross physical boundaries, but will picture what’s under your clothes often…. Very often….

—pervert!Ritsu who you accidentally touched one time, so he sat you down and gave you a lecture on harassment….. (he doesn’t want you unknowingly causing problems for yourself or touching anyone else, but he struggles to convey that he’s not actually mad at you for it. He just emotionally shit himself and didn’t know how else to handle it). He will think of this moment in bed at night and get ridiculously turned on by how nice it felt.

Romeo Lucci

—pervert!Romeo who thinks it’s cute how desperately in love with him you are (he’s a little delulu, you barely know him), but then again how could you not be?

—pervert!Romeo who convinces himself that you’re the one obsessed with him, and definitely not the other way around…. He even asks you if you’d like to be kept in one of his cages so he can give you more attention

—pervert!Romeo who almost tries to convince you to go gamble away all your money so you have to be indebted to him (he decides not to at the final moment when he sees you smile at him)

���pervert!Romeo who still imagines how’d you look stripped to your undies locked in a cage, begging him for mercy…. He cums every other night to the thought

—pervert!Romeo who still has half a mind to forgive all of Kaitos debts if you offer yourself to him and obey his wishes. He has come very close to suggesting it, but he thinks it’d make him look desperate. And desperate is ugly on anyone. So someone as good looking as himself should never stoop so low (he fucks up into his hand so desperately wishing it was you he was cumming into).

[gatorbites-imagines]

hi !! could i maybe get some rex splode x gnc trans male reader stuff, if you’re cool with that !! maybe smth abt the reader getting misgendered for wearing clothes they feel more comfortable with and rex stepping in to defend them :o thank you sm !!

Rex Sloan/Rex splode x ftm reader

Headcanons

Rex wasn’t the best guy up until getting shot in the second season, but that wouldn’t matter if you guys were dating, except for the fact that he would apologize to you and try his hardest to be a better boyfriend.

He might have misgendered you on accident the very first time you guys met, but when you corrected him that didn’t happen again. He might have been a dick sometimes, but he isn’t a bigot.

I like to think Rex is secretly into fashion at a low level, since he’s into stuff like decorating. So, he would be excited to help you plan your outfits.

Since he is a government experiment, he wouldn’t have that deeply ingrained image of gender either, so he wouldn’t care too much about you, your gender, or your way of expressing yourself.

In the beginning he wouldn’t be into wearing anything feminine himself though, since he’s quite insecure and unsure about himself and the image he puts off. But that doesn’t mean he wouldn’t support you.

His insecurity would have crossed over to how people treat you though. Since disrespecting you is also disrespecting him, but also because he loves you and doesn’t want you getting mistreated.

This leads to him getting into fights, both verbal and physical, since how dare they treat you like that? Who the fuck do they think they are? They can taste his damn explosions if they’re gonna keep that shit up.

In the beginning his acts of defending you can be quite a lot, since he takes peoples comments more personal that you do. To the point where he might even get snippy with people who do it on accident even if they correct themselves immediately after being informed.

But after getting shot in the head and rethinking a lot about himself, Rex would become better at dealing with himself, his emotions and his reactions.

This not only leads to him being a better boyfriend in general, but also not reacting so quick to violence and anger if somebody says the wrong thing or looks at you wrong. He still keeps a sharp eye on people though, especially when you are dressing the ways you prefer.

Where in the past Rex would make a loud scene, after the bullet he would be more lowkey. And by that, I mean, pull the person to the side or just quietly tell them that if they don’t stop nobody would be able to find the pieces of their body after he blew them up.

Of course he doesn’t always end up using threats of death, but that’s mainly because he knows you wouldn’t like it. to Rex, being transphobic on purpose deserves it, but since it wouldn’t be what you and others wanted, he would keep it as a last defense. Or at least wait for no one else to be around.

He makes sure to check up on you afterwards too. Rex would try to be subtle, but he isn’t really the most subtle guy. So, when he’s trying to see if your okay and affirm your gender, he says something like “you know you’re the most handsome guy I know, right?”

After understanding himself better, he might even get the interest in trying to wear different things. At this point I can’t imagine him wearing it in public, but when he’s alone or together with you, he might put on a few different things to see how he feels.

Rex always gets embarrassed about it though, especially if you comment about it, even if it’s telling him it looks good. So your best bet is to not mention it until he brings it up himself.

[motziedapul]

I had a thought about Wish and why it didn't work that I don't know if others have mentioned.

It was made clear to me after I saw this concept art for Star Boy what this film lacked. It lacked a throughline of DESIRE AND RELATIONSHIPS; not just romantic desire, though the scrapped possibility of "romance" is what made me think about it.

Also, just wanted to say how ironic it is that Star Boy is so reminiscent of Jack Frost from Rise Of The Guardians while Chris Pine, who voiced Jack Frost in ROTG, was the villain (and best part) of this disappointing film.

Despite being ABOUT people's desires and wishes, both Asha and her grandfather's desires are nebulous. "I want to inspire people", "I want more". More what? Inspire them how? Their motivations are pretty unclear, as are their desires. The King even points this out, and he's right to do so.

It wouldn't be so bad for Asha to want her grandfather's wish to be fulfilled if the film could make you feel emotionally invested in him and his motivations. Love for her grandfather and a grave injustice against him and others is a FANTASTIC motivation, which is undermined by the fact that everyone's pretty darn happy in Rosas, and there's no sign to indicate that there's something deeply wrong underneath the surface.

The problem with presenting a society that needs change in a film is that you need to show why it's not working, and yet by all accounts Rosas is a wonderful place to live. SHOW US, DON'T TELL US, WHY THIS IS A GRAVE INJUSTICE. You have to show who's being hurt by showing them being hurt.

It's unfortunate that a movie in the same month dealt with wishes on stars 10000 times better than Wish did, but Puss In Boots The Last Wish did pretty much everything better than Wish did. That being said, they had a blueprint for how to make Wish work, and they didn't even follow it:

Encanto.

I love Encanto. It's not Disney's strongest film, especially plotwise, but what it lacks in plot it makes up for in getting you emotionally invested. The music, the tragedy, the character relationships, they all work. And even Encanto didn't have a romance, but it had suffering, desire, and something was wrong that needed to be fixed, and most importantly, it convinced the audience of that.

In comparison, you have a king taking people's Wishes away because he saw the destructive potential of unfettered desire and greed, all in exchange for peace and happiness - and yet we do not see people suffering from this decision. We see Asha get angry about it before we ever see why she should be angry.

People have already mentioned that Wish lacks camp, so I'm not gonna go into that, but it lacks camp and any Disney animated film that lacks camp is one not worth watching.

In terms of relationships, the only one in the film that has any sort of chemistry or emotional complexity is that of Asha and Magnifico. They literally sing a love song to each other in the movie, which baffles me because it gives you the idea of a budding romance/non romantic but loving relationship between the protagonist and antagonist of this film, only to be followed by a heartwrenching betrayal that justifies Magnifico's descent into darkness. And that would have been a fantastic story (after removing the weird age gap, obviously, though Disney's no stranger to that).

There is no other relationship in Asha's life that seems to mean anything to her, not even her relationship with her grandfather, because the only interactions we see her have with him before deciding what's best for him is 1 single scene where she actively avoids spending time with him and her mother to sneak off.

In Coco, we understand how important Hector as a great grandfather is, because of this scene.

In Encanto, we immediately see how and why Mirabelle loves her family and is proud of them, and yet also how she suffers from their exclusion and isolation of her.

The character who is *described* as caring for others but never shown caring for anybody only ever has a moment with the villainous king, who himself only ever has chemistry with her and his wife.

What's infuriating is that there's a deleted scene that, if combined with another scene showing Asha's childhood and why her grandfather means so much to her, would've made her motivation clear.

There's a deleted scene where her grandfather sings a beautiful song, and her and her mother sit there in emotional silence.

Would've been nice to have it in the film.

The most interesting character in the film is King Magnifico, which is why they had to scrape all the nuance out of him in the second act. Asha is described as selfless but is deeply selfish and self-centred. Her desires are nebulous. Her motivations aren't convincing. The character they try to sell you is one we never see.

A romance may not have been entirely necessary, but Asha having a real relationship and therefore emotional stakes with someone absolutely would have. It would have clarified and justified her desires, her motivations.

What a waste.

-

P.S. The Animation in Wish is gorgeous, lively, and well-done, but the rendering, lighting and watercolour effects were badly executed. Please make the proper distinction - the characters move beautifully.

P.P.S. Yeah the music's bad. Say what you want about Lin Manuel Miranda but he's at least talented enough and Broadway enough to know how music can synergize with story and character. None of my criticisms about him as a person extends to his musical ability - Moana is my favourite movie, and he did a fantastic job there and on Encanto.

Apologies for the long post, but after seeing so many rants about this film I realized there's still something to touch upon that people haven't fully addressed.

[brujamala-aka-gigi]

a tarot card for the week

(made on monday 27th of may)

take your time or go by impulse, pick a pile, and scroll down to maybe find out what you can meditate about this week based on short messages from these tarot cards.

pile 1 pile 2 pile 3

pile 4 pile 5 pile 6.

pile 7 pile 8 pile 9

alright besties, lets get to it. keep in mind these messages are meant to be taken as prompts for reflection during the week. these are general messages, so please take what's relevant to you and don't overthink too much.

⋆ ˚｡⋆୨♡୧⋆ ˚｡⋆⋆ ˚｡⋆୨♡୧⋆ ˚｡⋆⋆ ˚｡⋆୨♡୧⋆ ˚｡⋆

•☽────✧˖°˖ PILE 1 ˖°˖✧────☾•

zodiac energy: fire signs, specially leo.

pick your fights wisely and think when it is precise to channel a more combative energy. don't pick a fight just because.

know when to confront those who question your achievements, not because of a need to prove them wrong, but because you have to make sure everyone is on the same page about the effort you put into getting to where you are.

don't panic when adversities are coming your way. you might not realize how many advantages you already have when standing for yourself.

passion and inspiration will take you far, but persistence and determination will take you even further.

take great care of the spaces and the people around you, defend them whenever possible.

•☽────✧˖°˖ PILE 2 ˖°˖✧────☾•

zodiac energy: pay attention to your mars placement.

pay attention to impulses. you have the power to act on them, but this is not a moment of your life where you can become reckless.

responsibility might become boring. this might be due to stability being achieved only by means of control. being in charge is demanding, allow yourself to delegate tasks and to get help from others.

if you are planning on switching things up a little bit or a lot, keep in mind that some level of structure is usually necessary, but don't feel pressured to fit into any convictions that are not entirely yours.

think deeply about the presence of empathy in your life. in regards to how you treat others and yourself. you might be kind to others, but if you are not kind and compassionate with yourself you will be faced with plenty of issues.

focus on nurturing your own personal power, on the virtues you already have, on your talents and abilities, before trying to dominate new skills.

•☽────✧˖°˖ PILE 3˖°˖✧────☾•

zodiac energy: tune into aries placements or your first house.

reflect on how to keep up the energy from brief moments of inspiration, make it last. look for new ways of exploring your creativity.

open-mindness is key when facing periods of existential burden. don't loose too much time overthinking, know when to stop reflecting and when to take action.

protect and nurture your ability to focus and to remain constant in anything you pursue. sometimes "new" doesn't mean "better".

nourish deep personal connections as these will make you stronger and hold you accountable for your mistakes.

don't allow such a normal and expectable part of life: failure, to get you stuck and unmotivated. take a few steps back, evaluate, move, think when your head is clear. there will be times when the opportunities will come to you, but it's important you are also well prepared to take them.

•☽────✧˖°˖ PILE 4˖°˖✧────☾•

zodiac energy: stay away from pisces men THEY ARE the devil !!! jk just tune into your neptune placement.

even if you feel or know you deserve to be a little self indulgent, a little reckless and to enjoy a phase of hedonism, remember that if you are loosing consciousness about yourself and others, you are stunting your personal growth.

that being said, if you're overwhelmed by your impulsive actions, think of them as a sign of something deeper that you can't quite formulate verbally or comprehend emotionally.

look for help and answers even if you might subconsciously fear getting them. many times the most useful knowledge is hidden in darkness, or hidden in plain sight when we are too distracted.

it is possible that many perceived limitations do not come from outside, they might come from your own inner thought patterns. it's about time you begin trusting your intuition, specially when it comes to questioning old beliefs.

•☽────✧˖°˖ PILE 5 ˖°˖✧────☾•

zodiac energy: pay close attention to any water signs in your chart.

move away from the past, but take your time and patiently reflect on what exactly made you walk away from anything causing you distress.

be prepared to face things that are far behind you already, it's a great moment to reevaluate what you left behind, not because you should bring them back, but because some things might need deeper closure.

as much as you wish to put your mind into less material related knowledge, remember to take care of those so you can safely embark on emotional or spiritual journeys.

unconsciously not feeling worthy of your achievements and not valuing them enough might get you to walk away from further success. be mindful of your ambitions manifesting in toxic ways.

when fulfilment seems like something utopic and far from your reality, think twice about it. you might not be aware of how far you've come already.

•☽────✧˖°˖ PILE 6 ˖°˖✧────☾•

zodiac energy: any 11th house placements.

be mindful on how you communicate with others. deep conversations are just as valuable as efficient ones, even if they don't get you the answers you need.

it's fine to keep moving, but taking time to reflect and be mindful of where you are going is just as necessary. you might feel like moments of calm and inactivity are stunting progress, but take these opportunities to rest. energy is not infinite.

bursts of conviction and inspiration are always useful, make sure you can create solids foundations for your ideals to become stronger and easy to manifest on your daily life.

embracing rational thinking during this week will be useful whenever you feel like brutal honesty can be achieved thru it. always keep in mind that too much logic is just as bad or even worse than too much emotion.

learn when to be patient, specially if you are used to rapid success.

•☽────✧˖°˖ PILE 7 ˖°˖✧────☾•

zodiac energy: any cancer placements in your chart.

learn how to recognize what parts of success are due to your own effort and which ones are thanks to casualties, context, and the help of others. this will give you a more mindful way to approach and channel your ambition.

celebrate even the smallest victories and share the joy whenever possible.

nurture your closest relationships and make sure that whoever joins you in any journey is someone who wants to grow alongside you. keep an eye open for manifestations of jealousy from others.

abundance is not only something that you can have materially, take a few steps back and think of what enriches your life yet hasn't been valued properly or taken for granted.

this is a moment to celebrate how you have been able to work alongside what the universe has put on there for you reach, gather strength and confidence from success and keep your head high when facing adversities.

•☽────✧˖°˖ PILE 8 ˖°˖✧────☾•

zodiac energy: any fifth house placements and fire signs.

recognition and pride shouldn't be ignored, but it's also key to remain humble. don't make yourself smaller but don't allow your ego to overstep your own boundaries.

take a deep look into what makes you confident and what doesn't. don't expect to tackle down all insecurities, focus on dissecting which ones are truly a problem and which ones are a product of deceit.

facing challenging situations and feeling victorious is not the final destiny or any journey, most times it's a milestone in a series of achievements necessary for greater and more fulfilling ways of living.

be careful with people who are overly enthusiastic about your success. you never know who is sweet talking their way into stealing your energy.

even if the spotlight is nice, public recognition shouldn't be your main motivation.

•☽────✧˖°˖ PILE 9 ˖°˖✧────☾•

zodiac energy: aquarius placements, and your rising placements.

learn how to differentiate between the people who are warning you against committing a mistake and people trying to scare you off taking necessary risks.

idealism can get anything started, but discipline has better chances of keeping it going.

a sense of optimism will be helpful as long as it's healthy and realistic. it is quite strange to come across someone who want's to pursue the search of a constant sense of joy and brightness nowadays, so don't allow that energy to get contaminated by other's opinions.

try to seek company, specially from people who value passion, creativity and unconventional ways of living.

take care of yourself and the universe will take an equal amount of care of you.

⋆ ˚｡⋆୨♡୧⋆ ˚｡⋆⋆ ˚｡⋆୨♡୧⋆ ˚｡⋆⋆ ˚｡⋆୨♡୧⋆ ˚｡⋆

ayy hello there im gigi, the one who did this. hii.

hope this week goes well for everyone, and that whatever card you got, you got something useful from it.

im not sure on what else to post other than P.A.C readings and my one card, one ramble thing. so idk for those who follow me i just want to let you know i'll be posting some polls on what to do with this blog.

thanks for all the support on my other posts!!!! omg i got so many notes wtffff. it makes me happy to know that some people vibe with my tarot content on here.

see you around, stay bad. <3 love gigi.

[maledistributionsystem]

He's older than you, stronger than you, farther in his transition than you. You think of him as an older brother, and he treats you like a little brother he's showing the ropes.

He check in to make sure you aint got symptoms of too high T, he be showin you how to size your clothes all proper like, he even brought you to a new shop to get your hair done at. You dont wanna ruin nothin, but you swear up and down this nigga got you in love.

You so far up in your own head though, you don't even notice. You don't notice how intentional it is, you don't notice that of all the locations to do a sub-q shot he without fail chooses to put it in your ass. You didnt notice how long his eyes lingered over your chest the first time you was able to take your top surgery bandages off, and your dense ass sure as hell aint notice how he manages to always find an excuse to sleep with you in your room.

What you did notice though, is that this time when he laid down behind you, and hugged you, this nigga hard as a rock.

You decided to be cool though, and let him settle down. Maybe it was just his wallet, or his phone. Sure the angle was wrong but grasping at straws is buying you time to not say anything out loud so you dont look dumb. You still drawing blanks. You haven't learned much about bottom surgeries yet, you know the two major types but you've been busy and the wait lists are long, no matter what its gone be awhile before you so much as get a consult. He got his done years before you'd met him. You just aint really looked too deeply into it yet.

So you dont get it, how is he hard?

Slowly you turn to face him, your face is burning but you're tryna play it cool, its not like he can see anything anyways. His eyes feel different right now, half-lidded but not like he's sleepy, you cant tell what this fuckers game plan is. You got lost looking in his eyes again and he smiles at you.

"What?"

You slowly rip the question outta your throat, syllable by syllable, askin him if he's actually hard right now. When he asks you if it bothers you, you dont really know how to respond. Doesn't he think of you as a little brother? he said as much right? Is he forreal into you? Is he just playin?

You're wearing the bewilderment on your face, and he starts snickering at you.

"C'mon lil man, you bothered or not?" You slowly shake your head. You wanna see it, actually, you wanna know how he's hard and what that means. He's grinning at you like he's gonna eat you, and turns you around to face him.

"Whatchu lookin so confused for?" He gently laughs the question at you, you can hear he tired but you get the feeling you're sorta being toyed with. your hand settles on his hip and you finally whisper, "Man lemme see it. Like how is you hard bro?".

You're not even looking at him anymore, you're looking at the bulge in his shorts. You knew he was a slut but you swear his dick just twitched. He answers you by pulling down the front of his shorts and letting his cock bounce out, and you're stunned.

You didn't know what to expect, but it looks like any other dick out there. You go to touch it but your hand falters before touching it. He lets out a breath and finally says something.

"There's a rod in the center, I can bend it into place so its like I'm hard. You wanna hold it?"

"Y-...?" You lose your question when you lock eyes with him again, he serious as hell. "...You really into me like that? Thought I was like yo little brother or somethin." You whisper.

"Still are." He breathes. Now your cock is throbbing, you ain't even realize you was hard before now. You have no idea what expression you're making, only that you're completely lost in his eyes. He's physically bigger than you too, and since he's laying higher on the bed than you he feels more imposing than he otherwise would.

"You sensitive? Like..." you don't know how to phrase what you want to say but he knows.

"C'mere scary ass." He chides gently as he takes your hand and wraps it around himself. You both let out a heavy breath and airily laugh in tandem about it.

You internally remark how warm it feels as you hold him firmly. You even swear you can feel his heartbeat, you wouldn't know if he hadn't already told you about how good his surgical team was and how you should go to them too.

You move further down on the bed, so you're face to face with it. You're equally amazed and deafeningly horny, now you wanna tease him, clearly he's into this, you want in on the fun too. You look up at him through your eye lashes and lick your lips.

"ayo big bro, lemme put it in my mouth, lemme see ho-" You can't even finish as he presses himself against your mouth and you eagerly breathe and swallow him down, groaning around his cock.

He groans and rolls his hips into your face, choking you on it till you reflexively pull back. "damn nigga you warm." pours out his mouth on the breath he let out, now your whole body is burning.

When you pull off, he sighs as you grip him again to stroke him languidly. "'m I gonna get set up like this?" you ask, just staring in awe.

"If you want. I can cum too."

Playfully you respond "Bro stop playin.", and he suddenly holds your wrist, hips stuttering.

"Lil ass talk too much." Suddenly his shin is against your shoulder and pushing you on your back as he keeps his knees to either side of you and hovers his hips above your face. The view of his balls has you panting like a dog, giving him the opportunity to press into your mouth.

He starts slow, finding a good angle so you dont choke so easily. As he thrusts faster he's panting louder, and you got your knees apart like you got somethin to grind on.

You got your hands on his hips, rubbing everywhere around his ass and the backs of his thighs, encouraging him to keep going. You're throbbing so hard you swear youre gonna cum from this somehow.

You hold his balls and in what little of your mind you got left you're marvelling them. You love the way they feel, and the way hes moaning make you think he likes the way you're massaging them.

When he cums you realized you missed the warning, him groaning your name and tensing up, you aint think much because he finally slowed down a bit right before he yelled. You suck as much as you can while you taste his cum, not thinkin about how he's right. He's got a hand on your head, not wanting to pull your durag off but clearly wanting to grip it.

he pulls outta your mouth and settles next to you while you stare at the ceiling. "You look zoned the fuck out." he laughs at you, and you roll your eyes even though he cant see you.

"Whatever you say daddy."

"Hush. Wanna see sumn?" he's got a hand on your cheek and you wanna drown in his post-nut voice, still you nod and look up at him like a good boy.

"Here," He shakes his cock a bit, and you hold the base. "This is how i be movin it." he shows you how to reshape the rod so he's soft again, or atleast looks soft. You're still amazed, amazed that one day this'll be you too, amazed that you'll get to fuck him too.

After you move to settle into his shoulder, he pulls his shorts back up and pulls up the blanket, you didn't know you was gonna do all that but you're fine with it. He better hope he knows he just unlocked a little monster thats gonna wanna see his dick all the time now.

[shmolish]

Finished Beast Yeast ep 3 last night..... I was not happy with the results, so now I'm forming a picture in my head of y/n cookie running to Shadow Milk Cookie and hiding behind him, fearful of Mystic Flour Cookie, shaking like a chihuahua with tears in their eyes.

If it's possible, can you expand on this, please? If you can't, then it's fine 👍🏻😁

AN: Takes place before the beasts were sealed but after they became corrupted- Uh if you want one in the present I can make one of those as well..! Also, I usually try to avoid using Y/N in my stories, but it just felt natural here-

Shadow Milk x Reader

Oneshot

Warnings: Swears, not proof read

-Fearful-

"And see? My little Y/N here is absolutely perfect in every single way." Shadow Milk was often one to brag about his significant other, the significant other in question being you, of course. It has long since become of a habit of his.

You've become somewhat used to it by this point. He bragged to anyone who would listen, so this happened quite a lot.

Though, something was different about this person.

Her apathetic presence, those uncaring eyes, the way she carried herself... it was all so nerve-wracking.

Shadow Milk had mentioned her a few times before. She was one of his friends. Mystic Flour.

She seemed uninterested in the conversation, yet listened anyway.

The very much one-sided conversation seemed to go on and on, and throughout it all, Mystic Flour continued to stare at you. Something about that gaze made you feel deeply uncomfortable, and you subconsciously held onto Shadow Milk's hand and shifted behind him.

He quickly noticed this and seemed to quiet down a bit. He saw how you began to shake a little, and how you tightend your grasp around his hand.

"Is something wrong?" He asked you, tilting his head to the side a bit.

You didn't want to say it out loud, for fear of potentially offending Mystic Flour.

It didn't take long for Shadow Milk to connect the dots. He covered his mouth with his hand, snickering a bit. "Doll, you're not afraid, are you?"

There was nothing you wanted more than to wipe that annoying grin off of his face. "Hey, fuck you!"

He sighed. "Oh come on. Are you seriously afraid of Mystic Flour?' The grin never left his face.

"I will be taking my leave now," Mystic Flour said before walking someplace else.

You crossed your arms and glared at Shadow Milk, obviously not amused.

He let out another sigh before placing a hand on your head, messying your hair up. "Doll, I assure you, there is nothing to be scared of. That emotionless dustball that somehow gets worshipped will never lay a finger on you because you're mine. And she's smart enough to not mess with my stuff, 'kay?"

You nodded your head and Shadow Milk whisked away a stray tear that you hadn't realized was forming.

He gave you a soft smile. "Next time I see her, I'll have to remind her to appear more friendly towards guests..."

[temis-de-leon]

Day 24 - Mistletoe kiss

Characters: Diavolo x gn!MC

25 kisses challenge Masterlist

Main Masterlist

CW: based on my Christmas experience with my christian family, Diavolo is kind of drunk, cultural misunderstanding, pre-established relationship

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Celebrating Christmas brought a stabbing sense of betrayal to their heart. It felt wrong, spending this specific holiday surrounded by the most powerful demons in Hell, and although Simeon and Luke saw no problem with it, MC still found trouble sleeping at night from the guilt and uncertainty.

Their human family had ceramic miniatures for the nativity scene and they dutifully recreated it with care and caution every year, shooting star and everything. Once, when they were a child and their family spent more time than usual to prepare it, they gave the farmers baskets with eggs, as well as hay stacks for the horses and fishes for the fisherman; moss and rocks, trees made of branches from the garden and wrapping paper simulating a starry night.

It was a tradition where they used their creativity for bonding and MC cherished the memories very much.

Now, however, Lucifer wanted them to help him hide presents for his brothers, one of them being Satan and another one being the Lord of Flies.

The whole situation made them feel a little nauseous, so they tried to ignore it to an extent.

Fortunately, the demons seemed to prefer celebrating Santa Claus over the Three Wise Men, and MC was deeply thankful for that, even when they were so unfamiliar with the fat bearded man dressed in red.

In the end, spending time with loved ones was the core of Christmas, right? MC was happy with that conclusion. Plus, wearing costumes and pretty clothes was fun and Diavolo's parties always ended up being a great time.

And there they were, at the late hours of Christmas Eve, half of them already passed out and the others drinking their way to sleep. Lucifer and Mammon resting against each other, mumbling nonsense that only they could understand; Belphie completely unconscious over Beel's lap, who was perfectly content being the garbage disposal at the table; and Levi and Satan playing some crime solving game on one of the sofas. Asmo was the only one who left for a party downtown and Luke was sent to bed hours ago. Barbatos and Simeon were stopping Solomon from doing something in the kitchen.

And Diavolo? Diavolo was staring right at MC. 

He'd been discreet for who knows how long, but the Demonus made him careless and obvious and MC managed to catch him more than a couple of times over the last half hour.

“Is everything okay?” they finally asked in a hushed voice, not wanting the others to pay them any attention.

Being completely alone with the prince wasn't the easiest of tasks and their growing feelings for each other begged them to put more effort in it.

Clearly tipsy, the redhead slowly blinked and looked at them in surprise, not expecting the question. He cleared his throat and passed a hand through his hair before laboriously getting up and offering a hand.

“I have something to show you” he said with slurred speech, eyes halfway closed and cheeks tainted in deep red.

MC tried to ignore the knot in their stomach with no avail, accepting the gesture and walking beside him to a nearby corridor,. They observed as he closed the door and trapped them both in dense silence.

There were multicolored tinsel in the walls and an overly decorated wreath in the wooden door, but, for some reason, Diavolo was timidly looking at the ceiling. 

They followed his gaze, staring at the berries wrapped in ribbon. Although it felt familiar, MC couldn't identify it. When they looked at Diavolo again, he was blushing even more.

“So…, do we…?”

“Do we…?”

“Kiss”

His voice was soft and deep, like caramel, and it made MC's heart flutter, but it was his words what made them gasp.

“Only if you want to” he quickly clarified with worry. Doubt crossed his features and MC forced their words out of their mouth.

“I do want to kiss you” they basked in his relief, even when they were stammering “But I didn't expect for you to just… say it!”

“You didn't? But I brought you to the mistletoe! Doesn't it work like that?”

Diavolo's face twisted in embarrassment, like a child who got their homework wrong.

“Oh Dia…” they sighed in pity, grabbing his hands with care “We don't do that in my country”

He stayed silent for just a second before letting out a chuckle and placing their hands on his chest. He was smiling, not bothering to hide his interest in their lips anymore.

“Let's try again, then. Would you allow me to kiss you, MC?”

They immediately stood on their tiptoes, earning a loving smile. He bent down to close the distance, stopping only to lift them before kissing them again at the right angle.

Christmas in the Devildom wasn't so bad, after all.

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Taglist: @ourfinalisation  @owlisbuffering  @chizukimp4  @ravenredwine @darkflowerav  @craftysclown @mehkers

[theoriginaluzisimp]

Dabi with an S/O that has a bad scar

(that he gave them)

Uh...Dabi with gn!reader and stuff.

Warnings: burns ig, stalking and kidnapping, Dabi is a little bitch, swearing and choking.

Also pls don't reblog my stuff! Or repost shit like that. Anyways enjoy :D

Dabi was never good with showing his emotions.

He tried to avoid talking about anything of the sorts as much as he could.

So when he felt a strange feeling in his chest when he saw you, a hero, he didn't recognize the love he felt. He thought of it as hatred. Which ended up in him attacking you.

At first, you dodged all his attacks and hit him with your quirk at least once. You were doing pretty good for yourself. Until your colleague got attacked by Toga, distracting you.

Dabi took this as an invitation to strike. With a flick of his wrist, he sent a wave of fire towards you, and you weren't able to dodge in time. The fire struck your neck, leaving you with a third degree burn.

Your colleague managed to get away from Toga, and get you to safety.

Dabi felt wrong. He felt a sinking feeling in his chest, like he made a mistake. He didn't know why. After all, when did he ever do anything wrong? He had this deep urge to see you. Maybe it was to finish the job. To burn you alive. Maybe it was to play with you a bit. But eventually, he gave into the urge and tracked your agency down.

You were sitting in you office, unfortunately finishing some paperwork. Rubbing your tired eyes, you lean back in your office chair. Being a hero was a great job, but you hated the paperwork. Especially when Hawks dumped all his baggage on you, ditching you do go do something stupid.

You heard a tap at your window, interrupting your thoughts. Looking up, you see a dark shadow perched on the window seal. You squint to try and see it better, and you'd be lying if you said you weren't scared. You hesitantly step forward, reaching out to open the window.

Dabi gets tired of waiting for you to open the window, so naturally, he breaks it and climbs in. You can see him clearly, and you feel your heart beat faster. Your mind was racing. There was a villain in your hero agency. You ready your quirk, ready to strike first and ask questions later. You raise your hand, when he suddenly grabs it.

The villain tilts his head, looking at your fist in his hand. He feels the strange feeling in his chest again. This annoys him. Deeply. So he breaks your wrist, causing you to yell out in pain. Your secretary hears this, and runs in. She freezes in place, scared out of her mind. You quickly stand up, ready to fight back.

Only to find out the villain has fled.

Weeks pass. No sign of Dabi. Well, to you that is. He keeps getting this...feeling..in his chest. He hates it. And the worst part? It happens any time he thinks about you. So he decides to stalk you.

Watching you in battle from afar, watching you in your agency, he even managed to find your house. Unfortunately for him, you're not an idiot. You close your curtains at night and lock your doors and windows. Damn.

Dabi eventually gets tired of this feeling. One day, he's on a misson with Toga. Toga is rambling about some random girl from U.A, the one that looks like Kirby. The thing that catches his attention, is the way she describes her feelings for the girl.

And everything she says, is how Dabi feels about you.

Toga suddenly mentions that she once considered kidnapping the girl. Dabi stops in his tracks. Thats it. Thats how he can face this fucking feeling in his chest. So he breaks into your house when your asleep, burns it down, waits for you to fall unconscious due to the smoke, and takes you back to the League of Villains hideout.

Only, he keeps you to himself. The others don't even know you're there. Dabi ties you to the bed, and waits. Then he gets tired of waiting after ten minutes. So he pinches your cheek, hard.

You jolt awake, your eyes wide. Dabi looms over you. "Morning." He finally says. You growl at him, and trash in your bonds. Dabi rolls his eyes, leaning against the wall. "Thats not going to work." He says, very unamused by your antics. You continue to ignore him. Dabi walks over to the bed, and grabs your jaw. His grip is firm, and almost hurts.

"Easy, creep." You spit back, trying to squirm away from his grip. Dabi tightens his grip on your jaw, but you won't let him win by wincing. "What the hell do you want?" You growl, narrowing your eyes. Dabi ignores your question, and lets his hand travel down to your neck.

You're wearing a turtleneck that successfully hides your scar. Annoyed by this, he rips your shirt off. Dabi ignores your discomfort.

His fingers lightly trace around the scar, making you squirm, wanting nothing more but to be away from him. Dabi grips your shoulders, making you hold still. He smirks. "Cute scar." He murmurs. "You really shouldn't keep it covered. It makes you look better." His statement makes you glare at him.

"You think I want people to see that? Its ugly." You bite back.

"Ugly? What makes you think that?" Dabi lightly squeezes your throat, making your breath hitch.

"Because you made it." You growl, trying not to let the fear show.

Dabi squeezes again, a bit harder. He leans down to your ear. "Well, personally..." He whispers. "I quite like it." He chuckles, pulling away.

Dabi runs a few fingers down your chest, now sitting on the edge of the bed.

"You're cute." He grins devilishly. "I think I'll keep you."

[liz-thinks-too-much]

The thing about being a trans person who doesn't want to transition and looks like what people would expect based on ther AGAB is that:

You think you're a fraud because you're not "as trans as other people" (bullshit)

You feel like you're being trans the wrong way (bullshit)

You say you'll never come out to your parents because "oh, well, I'm not gonna transition so I'll just keep them from knowing something deeply important about myself forever."

You invalidate your dysphoria because "it's not that bad" (bullshit).

You start feeling ashamed of wearing things related to you AGAB because you feel like you have to fit into expectations every time you get dressed so people will take your identity seriously.

You know people will rarely see you as your actual gender.

And you constantly wonder if you lie to yourself about not wanting to transition because you're just scared of admitting what you really want out loud and the changes you'll have to face after it.