#the lobotomy made you awful

[drawbauchery]

I thought this was Gonta for a minute

(nobutforrealthough)

no, gonta's interesting and well-written

[mediumgayitalian]

“Death Breath! Hey! Wait up!”

Nico bolts. He makes it about ten feet away from his cabin door before Will and his stupid long legs catch up with him, throwing an arm over his shoulder and then immediately tripping over his own foot and sending them both sprawling.

“I hate you,” Nico groans, curling up on the grass.

It’s too early for any of this. He was just trying to get back at Cecil for covering everything he owned in aluminum foil last week — and then he was going to go right the hell back to bed.

He knew he should have fucking shadow travelled.

“Aw, c’mon. You love me.”

Nico pretends to gag. The only thing he gets is Will’s crossed arms and raised eyebrow, so he doubles down and really starts to retch. Whatever. It’s eight thirty in the morning. He fell asleep at five. Rational thinking is a distant, distant memory.

“Whenever you’re done.”

“I will be sick at the thought for the next eight weeks,” Nico informs him. For dramatic effect, he looks up at Will’s face — which he cant even see, since the sun’s in his eyes — and shudders.

“You know, you have a genuine, beautiful talent for the dramatic arts, the likes of which I have never seen. Are you sure you’re not secretly an Apollo kid?”

I better not be, ‘cause then all the staring I do at your calves would be real weird, he thinks to himself, then considers whether he can convince Kayla to give him a lobotomy. He thinks she might like the opportunity.

“Piss off,” he says instead of that, artfully schooling his face into the aristocratic mask he’s perfected from his father, squaring his shoulders and looking at Will like he’s a pebble lodged in the flesh of his heel.

Will rolls his eyes. “Get up, Sharpay Evans. You’re gonna stain your shirt worse than you already have.”

Nico sniffs haughtily. “My shirt is perfectly fine, thank you very much. I order them in black for a reason.”

He notices a giant grass stain on the side when he stands. He ignores it. Will does not.

“Yeah, ‘cause you’re the Goth King.”

“Ghost King.”

“Right, right. That helps your case.”

Nico shoves him, fighting back a grin. “Whatever, Solace. What are you bothering me for?”

“Oh, yeah!”

Nico is a deeply cheesy person. Down to the core of him, past all the sarcasm and prickliness and trauma, or whatever, he’s made of fucking mozzarella, because what business does he have comparing Will’s eyes to the morning winter sky? Huh? That’s embarrassing. It isn’t even original. If Nico caught anyone saying shit like that out loud in real life, he’s collapse into the shadows from embarrassment. He needs electroshock therapy.

“I was thinking —”

“Rare,” Nico quips, just to watch Will’s eyebrow twitch. It does. Nico smiles.

“I was thinking,” he repeats, mocking glare in Nico’s direction, “that you and me go to the city this afternoon.”

“You chased me across camp for that?”

“Oh, please, Zombie Face. I chased you maybe twenty yards.”

“I think all that time sniffing rubbing alcohol has deteriorated your brain.”

“I think I’m going to shove you in the lake.”

“Feel free to try. You will not wake up the next morning.”

“Nah.” Will shoots him a smug smile. Nico trips over air. “I can be as annoying as I want and you still won’t kill me. I have impunity.”

Nico rolls his eyes, refusing to dignify that with an answer. The less he acknowledges his own shame, the more likely it will go away on its own. Probably.

“Anyways. Guess what Cecil told me today.”

“His last will and testament?” Nico guesses, suddenly remembering his reason for being up this early.

“No, no, not that.” Will pauses. “Well, I mean, he did. I passed it on to Chiron. He has requested that when you maul him, you avoid his face, because he wants to be a sexy corpse and he can’t do that if you destroy his prettiest features.”

“Noted. Please inform him I will come for him within a window of the next fifteen hours.”

Theres a very particular face Will makes when he finds something genuinely funny. A smile a little more crooked than his regular one, teeth working at his bottom lip to hold it back, left dimple appearing in his cheek. It makes Nico want to do stupid things like press his thumb into said divot. He instead shoves his hands deeply into his pockets.

“I’ll let him know.” He clears his throat. “Anyways. You know what day it is today?”

Nico squints. “Tues…day? No, Wednesday.” He glances at Will. It’s been maybe….three days since their weekly sleepover? No, fuck, four. He thinks. “Thursday. Final answer.”

“Monday,” Will corrects, “and, gods, you need to sleep more. And a calendar. But no, that’s not my point.”

“Feel free to get to it.”

“It’s Valentine’s Day,” Will finally explains. He tries for exasperated, but it doesn’t work — he’s clearly excited, bouncing on the balls of his feet and waving his hands. “And The Five Seasons is doing half off for couples, so you and I need to go!”

He waves his hands, as if tying off some grand reveal. His (blue blue blue blue) eyes are squeezed nearly shut by the force of his beam, which lessons slightly with every second Nico does not respond.

“William,” he says finally. He opens his mouth, then closes it again. “William.”

Will pouts. “What?”

“Explain how this is relevant to me, William.”

“Aw, c’mon, Nico! Don’t be difficult!”

“William,” stresses Nico again. “We are not a couple. Did you hit your head again?”

“Well, duh, Neeks, it’s about the scam!” He flaps his hand in a way Nico assumes is meant to convey something. “We’re gonna — eat! Cheap! By pretending to be a couple!” Now both hands are flopping, paired with wide, imploring eyes. “Obviously!”

“Obviously,” Nico repeats, slowly. He instructs one half of his brain to keep its focus on not melting into a puddle of blushing embarrassed goo, and the other to exercise restraint and not strangle the boy in front of him. A headache begins to press behind his eyes. “Will, what the shit.”

“You of all people!” Will throws his hands up. “You love scamming people! You hate corporate holidays! You frequently throw pebbles at people who look, and I quote, too obnoxiously happy! You’re the best hater I know! You should be on board!”

He makes a compelling point. Not that Nico is going to make that easy for him.

“You seem very invested in this,” Nico points out. He manages to keep his voice tastefully judgmental, which he’s very proud of.

“Of course I am! I want cheap Five Seasons food, godsdammit!” He pauses, switching tactics. “Nico,” he says softly. He puts a gently hand on Nico’s forearm, making him freeze. He is suddenly very, very close, and wow, did his hair always frame his face in gentle waves? Has that always been a thing? “I really, really want to scam a restaurant with you.” He smiles, small and crooked and gods, Will doesn’t look dangerous very often, but holy Hades when he does — “Will you make my Valentines, and scam a restaurant with me?”

His fingers begin to trace little circles in the inside of Nico’s wrist.

“Yes,” he squeaks, voice cracking.

“Yes!” Will cheers, pulling his fist. “Yes, hell yes, Nico! We are going to scam the shit out of this restaurant! Half off for couples? How about half off for heathens! Free money, baby! Fuck yeah!”

He turns back towards Nico, smile still wide and radiant, blinking eyes pools of sparkling excitement. Nico’s knees go a little weak. “I’ll come get you at 2! Thank you, Neeks!”

He runs off back to his cabin, only tripping twice. Nico watches him go, feeling a little like he’s tripping, too, with all the swooping his stomach is doing.

“Dude,” he mumbles to himself, shaking his head. “Be normal. Christo.”

It takes him ten straight minutes to get back to his cabin, even though he’s standing at the porch.

———

The obsidian handle of the Hades’ cabin door rattles.

“Neeks!” calls a voice behind the door, “you ready to go?”

“Shit, shit, shit, shit, shit.” Nico scrambles over to the mirror and stares at himself. He turns a little to the left. He scowls. “Shit!” Tugging the shirt off, he turns back to his closet, tossing the piece of clothing to join the rest of its brethren on the floor. “Shitfuck. Fuckshit. Shit.”

“Nico!”

“Coming!”

Tapping his foot rapidly, he looks harder, as if that will magically make the right shirt pop into existence, perfectly pressed, on a hanger. “Shit.”

“What could possibly be taking so long? You’ve had two hours!”

“I care about my appearance, Mr Flip Flops and Scrubs!”

“Bleh bleh! Hurry up!”

Nico bites his lip. It shouldn’t matter. It doesn’t, really. Five Seasons is not actually a fancy restaurant. He and Will just like to joke that it is, because it has tablecloths. They’ve gone there dozens of times before; they stop every time they’re in the city for supply runs or visits to Olympus or to harass their summer-only friends at school. There is literally no reason for Nico to be stressing about what stupid shirt he should wear. Gods know Will is wearing cargo shorts.

“Nico!”

“I’m coming!“

Scowling, he digs through the pile of discarded clothes until he finds the first shirt he’d put on — a dark green button up that was given to him, along with a bunch of other fancy clothes he never wears, by the Aphrodite cabin. He hastily shoves their buttons through their holes, cursing when he mixes them up and has to start over, and sprints over to the mirror to inspect himself.

The shirt looks good. It’s a little tight on the arms, which he suspects was on purpose, and the colour compliments his skin nicely. The buttons are a dark, shiny brown that match his eyes. They pair nice with his simple jeans and black vans, casual enough that he doesn’t look like he’s going to Prom, or anything stupid like that, but dressy enough that it looks like he put effort in. He runs his fingers through his hair, trying to make the staticky strands sit right, but gives up pretty quickly. It’s okay if one thing is a little messy, right?

“Finally,” huffs Will as the door swings open. He glances Nico up and down, then grins. “You look great.”

Nico was right. He is indeed wearing cargo shorts, although to his credit they are his one pair without various Head Medic stains. His sweater, too, is a pretty blue, V-necked, long-sleeved, and a completely different style than his shorts. It clashes horribly. His shoes are, for some reason, bright solid pink. Nico suspects Hecate magic. His hair is braided in two French braids, his favourite way to wear it. Nico believes he is also wearing a touch of sparkly eyeshadow.

“You look dorky.”

Will grins wider. “Thank you! I wouldn’t let anyone help me choose something.”

“You should have.”

“I wanted it to be authentic, Nico. Also, got something for you.” From behind his back, he pulls out a handful of daisies, black dirt clinging to their roots, like he plucked them straight from the ground. Nico is inexplicably endeared by the image, and prays the smile on his face is less soft than he knows it is.

“You got me flowers?”

“Well, duh, Avril Lavigne. We gotta sell the scam.”

Nico brings them close to his face and inhales deeply. They smell fresh and earthy and sweet.

“That’s a stupid reason to bring someone flowers.”

“Give them back, then.”

“No. Fuck off. They’re mine.”

Will’s eyes twinkle. “Okay.” He holds out his arm. “Ready to go?”

The jump is close enough that Nico can convince him to shadow travel, and not just because he sadistically looks forward to the shade of green Will’s face will get after. As dangerous as he knows it can be, he misses it, sometimes. There’s something comforting about it, something soothing and familiar. Shadow travelling to the restaurant eases any lingering nerves.

“If you’re gonna throw up, do it somewhere I can’t hear you,” he says as they materialize in an alley.

Will’s cheeks puff out. “I’m gonna do it on your fuckin’ shoes.”

“I will leave your ass here, Solace, I swear to the gods.” Despite his grumbling, he rests a cool hand on the back of Will’s neck until he’s recovered. “Good?”

“Yeah.” He straightens, dusting off his sweater. “Let’s go.”

Nico follows him down the alley and onto the street, elbowing past the crowd of pedestrians until they approach the familiar glass doors. He rolls his eyes fondly every time Will apologizes to someone.

“You need to be meaner.”

Will sticks his tongue out and tries to trip him. Unfortunately, he only manages to throw himself off balance, nearly crashing to the floor of Nico hadn’t caught him.

“Good gods, Solace.”

“That was your fault!”

“Yeah, yeah.”

The doors of the restaurant are absolutely plastered in cheesy red hearts and bows and cartoon kisses. And, as promised, a giant sign promising couples a fifty percent discount on their meals.

“My love,” says Will dramatically, holding out a hand, “shall we?”

Nico sighs, resting his hand delicately in Will’s. It sparks with electricity, like it always does. “I suppose.”

“Party pooper.”

“I’m not hearing oh, Nico, thank you so much for doing this incredibly stupid thing with me, you are my dearest friend and I owe you one. Or three, for some reason.”

Will’s mouth twitches. “Oh, Nico, thank you so much for —”

Nico shoves him, laughing. “Shut up.”

They’re seated pretty quickly, server smiling when they take notice of their clasped hands. Will orders chicken tenders, like he does every single time without fail, and water. Nico orders from the adult menu and absolutely does not make any kind of show about it.

“There is nothing babyish about chicken tendies.”

“Oh, of course not.”

“Is this about you having a credit card? That does not make you more adult than me. It makes you a nepo baby.”

“Mhm. Sure thing.”

“Nobody likes a nepo baby, Nico.”

“Look, I think your drink comes with a complimentary sippy cup.”

Teasing and joking with Will is so easy that Nico forgets the core of their mission. The pink garlands hanging from the ceiling fade into the background — he’s too busy crying with laughter when Will nearly chokes to death on a french fry, too busy flicking a forkful of food at his shoulder just to make him shriek, too busy kicking his shin under the table. He catches Nico’s foot between his the fourth time he tries it, keeping it trapped for the rest of the meal. Nico finds he doesn’t mind.

“And your bill,” says their server when they’re done, setting down a slip of paper. “Forgive me if I’m being presumptuous, but do you two qualify for today’s discount?”

Will smirks widely. “We do,” he says, with no small amount of pleasure. He shoots Nico the least subtle wink of all time. Nico rolls his eyes, cheeks going a little pink.

“Great! You guys have a wonderful Valentine’s day.”

“You, too.”

The server hurries away, turning to their other tables. Will’s smile is wide and smug.

“I knew it would work.”

“Duh. Easiest scam in the world, Solace.”

He sticks his tongue out. “And thus the best payout. You’re welcome.”

“Blah, blah. Gimme the bill.”

“Um, no way, di Angelo. I’m paying.”

He opens his wallet before Nico can stop him, mouthing as he counts the bills.

“What? No! I’m paying.”

“Are not.”

“Am too!”

“Are not.” He sets down a couple twenties. Nico snatches them right back up. “You we’re just complaining about my credit card!”

“Exactly. Thus my need to continue to pretend you don’t have one, so we can continue our friendship.”

“Solace, I swear to the gods.”

“di Angelo, I swear to the gods.”

Nico stares him down. Will stares back. He doesn’t even try to hide his lazy grin, his laughing eyes.

“You’re not paying for this by yourself,” Nico says firmly. “You don’t have a job. My father invented being rich.”

“Sure, but I made you come with me.”

“Ugh!” Nico throws his hands up, imagining how satisfying it would be to wrap his hands around that long neck (followed by his teeth and his tongue and his —). “Why are you impossible? I would’ve gone with you no matter what, stupid!”

As soon as he says it he wants to stick his head in wet cement. For a brief second, something like surprise flits across Will’s face, before he schools it back into his teasing smirk.

“Well, obviously, Death Breath. I’m excellent company.”

“You’re literally the most annoying person I know.”

“And yet here you are, hanging out with me, of your own volition.”

“…I’m paying next time.”

Will grins. “Whatever you say.”

They walk around the city for a while before heading back to camp. Will says it’s because he needs the air, Nico knows it’s because he wants him to rest a little longer before trying to shadow travel again. He tries not to let himself get all melty inside.

(Nobody willingly hangs out around the city for the ‘air’. He’s a shit liar. Nico should be offended.)

It’s nearing curfew by the time they melt back out from behind Thalia’s tree, extra shadows of early evening making the trip easier.

“Those fries are going to make a reappearance,” Will grimaces.

“Not if you don’t want me to kick you in the face.”

“You’d never.”

He would indeed never. But he would rather pass away than admit it, so.

“C’mon, dot face. It’s getting late. You have a cabin to run.”

“Oh, Nico,” Will says in a breathy falsetto, “are you walkin’ me to my cabin? How chivalrous!”

“Nevermind.”

“No no no no no I’m kidding, I’m kidding!” Nico allows himself to be tugged, weak to Will’s giggles. “Walk me to my cabin. C’mon.”

Sighing, as if he’s so put out, Nico does. Some point in between Thalia’s tree and the amphitheater, Will’s hand slides down from around his wrist to tangled in between his fingers. Coincidentally, his mouth goes dry.

As they approach the Apollo cabin, Will slows to a stop.

“Hey.” He squeezes their fingers together, smile soft in the dying light of dawn. “I had fun today. Thank you for coming with me.”

Nico swallows. One day, those words will be said in a different context, if everything goes well for Nico, and he’s not sure how the hell he’s going to handle it without bursting into flame. “Yeah, well. Anything to scam a restaurant.”

“Right.”

They walk the last few steps to the cabin, rickety porch steps creaking under their feet as they approach the open door. Will doesn’t let go.

“Hey, Nico.”

“…Yeah?”

Quick as a flash, Will leans in and presses the softest of kisses to his mouth. The noise Nico makes is practically punched out of his lungs, spine going rigid in surprise.

“You can pay for our next date, okay?”

He’s gone before Nico can respond, ducking into his cabin with a small smile and closing the door behind him. Nico stands there, like an idiot, for three solid minutes at the very least, distantly aware of the giggles coming through the open window.

His hand comes up, fingers brushing his bottom lip.

“The little fucker set me up.”

Valentine’s day scam. Please. The only scam today was the scam of Will’s sneaky asking.

Nico smiles.

“You’re a mess, Solace!” he shouts, knowing damn well Will is listening.

He’s right. “Goodnight, Nico!”

Shaking his head, Nico runs back to his cabin, entire body tingling and cheeks aching with his grin.

[ohtobeleah]

California Fornication //

One — ‘That was Jake’

Summary: When the man you’d been seeing turned out to have a wife, your world came crashing down around you. While you tried your best to move onwards and upwards, the very reason for all your recent relationship problems comes strolling into the bar.

Warnings: Mentions of cheating. Love Triangle x2. Bradley Bradshaw x F!reader. Jake Seresin xF!reader. Question ing Morality. Angst.

Word Count: 1.9k

Author Note: Based off the first scene Mark Sloan is in. Greys Anatomy.

Series Masterlist | Main Masterlist

It always plays on repeat in your mind like a slow motion picture, like a scene in one of those old timey movies where everyone and everything slows down so that the main protagonist can understand the situation unfolding around them. 

That moment where your boyfriend of only a few months— Bradley ‘Rooster’ Bradshaw, told you that he was technically married, haunted you day in and day out. Married to the woman who’d come up to the pair of you in the locker room on base after she’d been transferred to North Island. She’d come waltzing over with a confident smile and a pretty face. She knew she was about to turn your life on its axis. 

For better or worse. 

“Y/n.” It wasn’t often people actually said your name, majority of the same it was your callsign—but the way the colour drained from Bradleys face as he turned to you with a gut wrenching look smeared across his usually perfect face, had your stomach churning. “I’m so sorry—“ 

“Hi, I’m Katie Bradshaw—“ The woman, who mind you, was stunning to say the very least, stuck her hand out to shake yours. You took it gracefully, with enough conviction in your grip to not have it show you were completely blindsided by that all too familiar last name. 

“Bradshaw?” You smiled softly as you sent Rooster a confusing look. He’d never mentioned a sister or a cousin before in the few months you’d been seeing and sleeping together. 

“I’m Rooster's wife—“ Those three words would forever haunt you. “And you must be the woman who’s been screwing my husband?” 

“Hey! Siren!” It was Phoenix’s voice that broke you out of the trance you’d fallen into as you showed. Her fist slamming against the shower door three quick and consecutive times made you jump a little as the warm water encapsulated you entirely. “You coming to the Hard Deck?” 

“Yeah yeah, just give me a few minutes!” You replied as you washed your face. “I’ll meet you guys over there.” It had only been three weeks since you called it quits with the mustache having aviator who had stolen your heart. The entire situation made you feel dirty. Even if you weren’t the one in the wrong. No amount of showering could wash away the dirty feeling you’d been left with. 

What could be worse than being branded the dirty mistress? That no one told you about the cheating scandal that had rocked the Bradshaws' happy marriage about a year ago. That was worse. 

Bradley swore black and blue he was going to tell you. He’d sworn the rest of the squad to secrecy about the details too. He wanted to be the one to tell you. To tell you that you were the first woman he’d been with since he’d walked in on his wife, Katie, and his best friend, Jake ‘Hangman’ Seresin, in bed together. 

Still, the ultimatum was given. You’d asked Bradley to pick you, choose you, love you. But when the time came to decide he chose his wife. His reasonings were none of your business nor concern. 

And so you walked away. Labelled the mistress and the interim love affair. Even against the Chester you didn’t compare—and that crushed you completely. 

“You’ve been doing that an awful lot lately.” Pennys voice broke through the haze you’d fallen into at the bar. The drink you’d ordered, Gin Sour, sat in front of you on a Hard Deck coaster. “What’s on your mind daydreamer?” 

“More like a never ending nightmare Pen.” You sighed before reaching for your drink. “This whole situation makes me feel like I need a lobotomy.” 

“Rooster still trying to force a friendship?” In truth Bradley thought he owed his marriage just one more shot. But right after you walked away he immediately started to regret his decision to choose his wife. He couldn’t stop thinking about you and all that was you. He’d made the wrong decision, but was too proud to admit it. Especially to his wife. 

He stood across the Hard Deck with a beer in his hand and his arm slung around her hip, looking at you like a puppy you’d left out in the rain. He missed you, oh so much. And that fact you hardly spoke to him these days made his heart hurt inside his chest. 

“Yeah—and I don’t think I can handle it anymore.” You admitted before taking a sip of your drink. “I’ve asked for a transfer, just to make it easier. I can’t focus, can’t sleep, because he’s just—always around.” 

“Sounds to me like you’re just running away from your problems.” Penny held her tongue as she watched the tall sandy blonde appear next to you at the bar. “That, or you know that you’re still in love with the guy and no matter what you do he’ll still manage to wiggle his way in because you’ll always allow him to.” It took you a few moments to register what the stranger beside you said as you eyed him up and down. 

“Sensitivity—“ You rolled your eyes. “I like that in a stranger.” The alcohol coursed through your body like a mild painkiller. “Are you new in town?” The civvies were an excellent camouflage against the sea of tans that flooded the Hard Deck—and Penny wasn’t about to be the one who told you the stranger you were talking to was the reason for your current situation. 

“Just visiting—“ He made sure to lie, a little white lie never hurt anyone. Or so they said. But the man beside you with the perfect smile and emerald green eyes definitely wanted to see how far he could get this conversation. “I’m confounded by all the patches and it’s only my first day in town.” He sighed softly as he sat beside you. “Budweiser please Barkeep.” Penny nodded without another word. 

“You get used to it, North Island is a Naval Base after all.” It felt like a needed explanation. The stranger beside you nodded softly as he fished his wallet out of his back pocket. 

“So I’ve heard.” A comfortable silence fell between you and the handsome stranger as he waited for his beer. “Kinda wish I’d stayed in bed, if I had known this place would be crawling with Naval Officers I wouldn’t have bothered.” Oh he knew, he knew all right. 

He knew that the Hard Deck would be packed to the rafters with the Dagger Squad and he certainly knew North Island was a Naval Base. Why? Because he was a part of that designated team. You’d just been the one who replaced him while he was tasked to special ops. Now? He was back to cause chaos. 

“Hey Rooster—“ Fanboy grabbed Bradley’s attention away from Bob. “You see who’s at the bar with Siren?” As Bradley turned his attention back to where he’d known you to be sitting for the better half of the evening, he immediately saw red. A jealousy that rivaled nothing he’d ever felt before consumed him fully, even if his wife was tucked in at his side. 

“We just met and already you’re talking about bed.” You chuckled softly as you took another sip of your drink. Penny had since passed Jake his Budweiser and before you knew it, he was laughing softly beside you. “Not very subtle.” 

“Being subtle was never really my strong suit.” The man beside you replied with a look of all knowing. He knew something you didn’t. If you didn’t know any better you would have asked what that may have been. But you chose to take another sip of your gin. Settletting once again into the comfortable silence that surrounded you and the stranger to your right. 

“So, you ever go out with co-workers?” It stunned you for a second, the forwardness of such a question, but then again—you still didn’t know this guy's name and he was making the heat in your cheeks reach new uncharted heights. 

“I um—“ You tucked some of your hair behind your ear and turned to give the golden skinned, white T wearing man beside you your full attention. Crossing your legs as you did so, so that his knees were on either side of yours. “I make it a rule not to.” His answer sent a shiver down your spin. A good shiver. A shiver that made your core flutter. 

“Then I am so glad that I don’t work here.” Maybe it was the gin talking or maybe it was your recent breakup, but this guy was the very definition of a piece of art. He was gorgeous, an Adonis that surely would have come straight out of accent metrology. 

“Are you hitting on me?” You tried to hide the keen grin that threatened to creep across your slightly heated face, but the sudden attention was giving you an ego boost you desperately needed after being rejected in favour of the cheating wife. 

“Would that be so wrong?” Oh this guy was good. Too good. His infectious smile captivated you in every way it could have. His eyes held a story that was dying to be told. His confidence made you want to lean in and taste it, like hard candy it probably tastes just as sweet as his scent smelled. With notes of Vanilla and warm Bourbon lingering from his neck. 

So you stuck your hand out for him to accept ever so politely. His eyes never left your as you smiled and bit your bottom lip bashfully. 

“I’m Y/n—“ “Lieutenant Y/n Siren Y/l/n.”  “And you are?” Nothing could have prepared you for what happened next. Remember that slow motion we were talking about earlier? Well, the seconds it took Bradley Bradshaw's fist to collide against your handsome mystery man’s cheek, it felt like a century as it played out in painfully slow motion before you. 

His head hit the bar with a thud as beer spilled into your lap. 

“Rooster! Jesus—!” You gasped as you stood and pushed against Bradley’s chest to back him up and away from the man you’d just been talking to. “Fuck! what the hell was that!?” 

Bradley didn’t answer right away as you turned to watch the blond stand with blood dripping down and out of his nose. The two stood there in silence, eyeing each other off as Penny fished out the bar's basic first aid kit. 

“That—“ Bradley huffed as he shook his throbbing hand. His jaw had never been so clenched before. He was furious and full of a rage that burned so deep it could have raised his core temperature by a few degrees. 

His wife stood off to the side looking all kinds of guilty. As did the rest of the Daggers. They knew this was about to get messy. They knew if he was back and already had his target set on you then there was going to be an all out war between the two men who stood ready to run at each other like angry bulls. 

And you, well—you were more concerned about the blood gushing from the nose of your stranger than you were about your ex’s possibly broken hand. But Bradley turned back to you, for a mere second to explain. 

And when he did—you forgot what morals were.

“That was Jake.”

***~***~***~***~***~***~***~***~***~***~***~***~*

[vvickydisc]

Please, I need fun facts about the Abandonware cast here. Like, how Jax's personality changed, Ragatha's, Gangle's, etc.

Gangle looks so fucking cool. Jester, too. Why did the others gain names but the Jester just stayed as "Jester"?

This is such good AU, we need more info about it.

let me try to break down your questions! How Jax's personality changed? I mentioned how the cast wasn't originally like this when they got stuck in the circus! Meaning Jax was pretty awful to everyone, I hate to tell and have no way to properly show it (Hopefully one day as a comic but for now heres a dumb doodle) but, Gangle (After receiving her mask) & Kinger had a idea to change Jax's behaviour! With lobotomy! The two really ganged up on him and just stirred his brain. Theres the question of how thats even possible if nothing in the digital world affects your mind. The short answer is in this AU the digital aspects do affect them. How Ragatha's personality changed? With Ragatha here is a little different, its hard to be positive after witnessing violent glitched out NPCs and abstraction in general. So you think a doctor would help you out how to regulate these feelings/cope better. Kinger had other plans! (I actually wanna tryyy to keep this lowkey but) Ragatha faced isolation and the whole situation just made her alot more desensitized and apathetic. Hows Gangle's personality changed? Well, one day Jax really broke her mask pretty badly, left her ribbons in tatters. Ragatha didn't seem to notice how much damage Jax did, weakly giving small encouragement to pick herself back up and walked passed her (I should note this is before Kinger 'helped' Ragatha) Zooble was in a bad state of mind, intentionally ignoring her. Kafumo was confined. (It'll be explained in the future) So Kinger was the only one to really help her. Giving her a stronger mask! The mask isn't like mind control or anything, I feel like Gangle got confident with it on and was already pushed to her limit of being the victim. Why did the others gain names but the Jester just stayed as "Jester"? That's easy! Caine was the one to give Pomni a name and since he wasn't there, Jester doesn't have a proper name. I'm assuming Ragatha, Zooble, Kinger and Jax are self given names since the "Name Machine" only has five letters on it. Gangle's name was of course given by Jax. I'll have to give some fun facts one day! Since this post is already kinda long, sorry for that!

[mossy-green-aka-ferrythem]

Realizing that people when they are following things and can realize or notice imperfections in it and what not can have a really strange attitude of absolution.

Like. The idea of being absolute.

I am pertaining to the messes Project Moon have gotten themselves into, and how people seem to frame leaving, or going full scorched earth as a moral decision when it's. Kind of not really.

I mean I have already made up my mind in terms of interacting with Project Moon. I adore the stuff this studio creates, while still, I don't spend any money on Limbus Company because I don't want to support that practice, the practice of Gacha, and just. Kim Ji Hoon's generally irresponsibility.

I'd say the big reason why this mess has come about in the way it has is because just. Kim Ji Hoon is irresponsible, not evil, just. Extremely irresponsible. He's not so much an "evil CEO", more like one who is deeply, deeply irresponsible, if what I have seen doesn't befool me.

He's just awful at communication. The harm caused by him in relation to the artists is just. Miscommunication after miscommunication, from what I have seen, and miscommunication can become very harmful, thus them being in hot water.

However, the miscommunication is just being continued. Posting screenshots on OFFICIAL company social media, venting on livestream, and the entire "we MIIIIIGHT go bankrupt..." is just. Please. Do not conflate the themes of faith and shit present in Library of Ruina to this because like. There is no grand story here, this is a real world case of a CEO who is not fit for a leader ship position acting in an extremely foolish way. Do not kneel to a fool.

You can still love what the studio has created, yes, I mean hell, I love Lobotomy Corporation and Library of Ruina with all my heart, and I hold the Limbus Company sinners in quite the warm regard. However, do not pledge parasocial fealty to a fool. To harbor interest or to like something is not to be absolute. It's a state with many levels of critical thinking, critical thinking I would like to see more of.

[beenbaanbuun]

waterparks songs w/ ateez

i had to do this for teenage me! also i’ve seen parx more than any other band so like… i had to!!

also awsten writes a lot about exes so there weren’t many songs to choose from (from a non-angst standpoint point). the entirety of greatest hits is also not on here bc that man just wrote an entire banger of an album about having shitty mental health… he’s so real for that 🙂‍↕️

yes the colours of the lyrics match the colours of the era… sue me

is this proofread??? uhhhhhhh🧍🏻‍♀️

park seonghwa - sleep alone

‘i feel dead and a half, but you’re making me laugh’

miserable; that’s the only word to describe how you feel. with a stuffed up nose and a tickle in your throat that just won’t seem to leave, you’ve found yourself wanting nothing more than to stay in bed with a hot bowl of broth. you know it would help you more than the cold tablets have done, the wretched things keeping you drowsy and dull. it only serves to make you feel that much more awful.

but the clatter you hear from downstairs brings a weak smile to your face. the sound of a metal ladle against a ceramic dish makes your heart pitter-patter in a strange mix of excitement and adoration. you’re not sure which you’re hungrier for; the soup, or seeing your boyfriend poke his head into the room. it’s not difficult for you to admit how much you’ve missed him this past week, able to hear his soft snores coming from the guest room, but unable to see his tired face next to yours.

until of course, this morning.

he’s been avoiding you like the plague until roughly 7:34 am when you were rudely awoken by a pair of arms snaking themselves around your waist. you’d mumbled something incoherent about not wanting him to get sick, but he silenced you with a quick peck to your lips. “i don’t mind getting sick for you, darling,” he whispered against your lips, “i don’t like sleeping alone; you’ll never have to do it again.”

it brings a soft smile to your face to remember how difficult it had been for him to unravel himself from you to grab a portion of the soup he’d made just a few days prior. he’d whined into your neck like a puppy, telling you all sorts of pretty things about how hard it is to abandon you while you’re in such a state. you’d giggled at him, the sound quickly devolving into a coughing fit that finally convinced him to get up and grab you that soup. if you knew that would be all it took, you’d have faked a coughing fit much sooner.

kim hongjoong - peach (lobotomy)

‘you found me, and finders keep’

“i wrote a song for you,” hongjoong’s voice fills your ears the second you pick up the phone. it’s eager and bubbly, clearly full of enthusiasm for whatever it is that he’s made. you nod, despite his inability to see you, before you remember exactly what it was that you wanted to do.

“isn’t it like 3am where you are?” you scold him gently, taking a glance at your clock just to make sure you’d got it right. it takes a moment of two to do the maths in your head, but sure enough, you’re right. it’s 3am and your boyfriend sounds more awake than you do. “what are you still doing up, hongjoong?”

he chuckles nervously, clearly understanding the direction of the conversation. perhaps he should have called you as a more believable time of day, but then again, if he did that then there wouldn’t be much point to what he’s done. he stayed synced up to your time zone for a reason; so he’d never have to be awake without you.

“it’s not late over there, though,” is his justification. he says it like it explains everything to you, yet it only serves to leave you more confused than you were at the beginning of the conversation. you don’t argue, not having nearly as much energy as hongjoong seems to, despite the time difference. “besides, i’ve been busy! sleep could wait until after i’d finished my latest creation.”

you sigh, “hongjoong—”

“nope!” he cuts you off, a smile evident in his voice, “you’re the reason that i spent so long hunched over my computer making this; you have to be the first person to hear it.”

jeong yunho - i’ll always be around

‘i’m dying to be your everything… everything’

“if i died tomorrow,” it’s an odd start to a question, but as you lay on the roof of your apartment, hand in hand with your boyfriend, it just seemed right. it’s moments like this where you feel you can get all those silly thoughts out there; would you love me if i was a worm? do you think snails are sentient? and of course, if i died tomorrow— “what would you do?”

there’s a deep chuckle from yunho, grabbing your attention from the stars and stealing it all for himself. your turn your head, choosing instead to look at the man you believe holds the universe in the palm of his hands. although the stars are pretty, the twinkle that lies in his eyes when he casts them upon your face is much better to gaze upon. why would you want to stare at the far away stars when you have a much brighter one so much closer.

“i’d learn necromancy,” he smiles in a manner that is so infectious that you can’t help but join him, “and if that doesn’t work, then i’d just have to hope you’d haunt me.”

“haunt you?” you ask incredulously, “wouldn’t you be scared if things started going bump in the night?” he shakes his head, and honestly you believe him. there’s not much yunho would admit to being scared of, especially not the concept of ghosts. “well, how would you know it’s me and not just some other random dead person who’s taken up residence in our apartment?”

“oh, i’d know,” he turns into his side to get a better look at you, “in the same way i know you’re not going to die tomorrow, idiot.”

you can’t help but laugh a little at that.

“you’re right,” there’s a knowing grin on his face when you agree with him, “i’ll always be around.”

kang yeosang - sneaking out of heaven

‘if i’m not brainwashed then i’m trying to be’

he must be an angel given to you from above. with the way he treats you so gently, soft words and even softer touches, it’s not hard to believe. his beauty even matches that of a heavenly being, leaving you breathless and in awe each and every time your gaze falls upon him. he must’ve snuck out from beneath his master’s gaze to come down and visit you; it’s the only explanation as to why he’s sat beside you in your car, carefully crafting a driving playlist for your enjoyment.

“what song next?” he asks, deep voice sending shivers up and down your spine. it takes everything you have to keep your eyes on the road, although you’re sure that death by staring at your boyfriend would be an excellent way to go. “i was thinking something of a similar genre but maybe a bit more… exciting. i think i’ve let the mood drop a little with my last few choices.”

you don’t mind, although you very rarely do when it comes to yeosang. he knows best, is what you tell yourself when you hopelessly agree to everything he says. honestly, if he told you to go swimming with a group of blood thirsty piranhas, you’d probably do it without a second thought. how could you say no to someone like him?

“put whatever you want on, sangie,” you say, “whatever you choose will be good, i’m sure of it.”

he hums in uncertainty, “but you’re the one driving!” oh, so considerate… he’s perfect, “surely you should get to choose, right?”

“i am choosing,” you argue, “i’m choosing whatever it is that you want on, my angel.”

choi san - telephone

‘i’m living on a target and you shot it with an arrow’

as far as first dates go, this might be the strangest you’ve ever been on. call it love at first sight, or just pure, simple infatuation, you don’t care. all you know is that you need to know everything about this man. what can you say, you’re invested?

“what do your parents do?” you ask, trying to keep your voice from wavering too much and giving up your true feelings. sure, you might be in far too deep to go back, but you can still appreciate this for what it is; a first meeting between two strangers. the last thing you’d want to do is scare san away by being overly excitable by something as simple as his presence.

play it cool, maybe then you’ll get somewhere.

“oh, you know,” he shrugs, clearly not too excited by the question you’ve posed. perhaps it is a little surface level. maybe you were too focussed on making yourself seem normal that you’ve made yourself seem uninterested instead! it’s fine, you tell yourself, you can recover from this. “they just do a bit of everything really. we lived in the country my whole childhood so there weren’t exactly many fancy office jobs going…”

“oh, you’re from the country?” you light up with interest, happy with the tiny piece of information that you can definitely use to your advantage. “why’d you move here? any big plans, or just a change of scenery?”

he seems to light up at that question, smiling as you give him a gateway to talk about his future dreams for a few minutes. as the words tumble from his lips, passion oozes from them. every single word is full of excitement and glee, and as he rambles on and on about his future, you realise that you’re more than happy to just sit and listen and imagine yourself as a part of it all.

song mingi - funeral gray

‘i know your dying wish is to be baptised in my spit’

“i didn’t take you for much of a smoker,” a deep voice calls from your left, the tall guy you’d shared a quick conversation with earlier taking a step closer to you. he’d looked pretty under the flashing lights of the club but right now, lit by nothing but the moonlight and the dim flickering of the smoking area sign, he looks even better. his sharp features are illuminated in such a way that you’re sure they might cut you if you get too close. maybe you’re just attracted to danger, you think to yourself as you take a step closer. “that’ll kill you, y’know.”

it’s a snarky remark, meant to be taken as tongue and cheek if the annoyingly handsome grin on his lips is anything to go by. maybe if you had another drink in you, you might have leant forwards to kiss it right off of his lips. for now, although the temptation to press your lips to his is very much there, you settle for blowing a stream of smoke at him.

he waves his hand, clearing the grey cloud in mere seconds. there’s a look of mirth on his features, which only serves to make you giggle. “now you’re going to die too!” you jest, moving your hand up to take another drag. the man mutters something about you being annoying, to which you have to agree; there’s just something so fun about getting under the skin of a man you’ve never met before. it just makes it that much more satisfying when by the end of the night, you have them wrapped around your pinkie.

“what’s your name anyway?” he purrs, pushing his back against the same brick wall you’d found yourself leaning against. you shoot him a cocky look.

“you’ve got to work much harder to get that information out of me, pretty boy.”

jung wooyoung - dream boy

‘cause i was born to be your favourite’

it was a fairly easy question that had been posed to you, one that you would’ve answered within seconds on any other day, yet right now you seem to be struggling. the answer is right there at the forefront of your mind, sitting on the very tip of your tongue. realistically, it shouldn’t be that hard to come out with it, yet as wooyoung stares you down, you find yourself swallowing the answer and shrugging instead.

“oh, come on!” he whines, leaning forward to poke at your shoulder with a strangely sharp finger. you wince, yet your friend seems to have other things to care about that your pain right now. “you have to have a type! just… build him from the ground up! pick his pieces.”

any other time you would’ve answered with a smile. long black hair and sharp brown eyes, a tongue that could rival the sharpest of wits and a laugh that any self-respecting witch would be jealous of. you know exactly what you want and he’s sitting right in front of you.

“i really don’t care what my future boyfriend looks like!” you insist, giving your friend a fake laugh when he rolls his eyes and scoffs. perhaps if you’d have been paying more attention you would’ve noticed the slight smirk that he wears.

“oh, please,” he purrs, shifting until he’s sitting on his haunches, towering above you. things move quickly and suddenly his arms are either side of you, caging you between him and the arm of the sofa. “i’ve seen the way you stare at me; i know i’m your dream boy.”

choi jongho - brainwashed

‘everything’s clean except for my thoughts’

you don’t do relationships. you never have and you told yourself that you never would. it’s just not you, being tied down to one person while there’s a whole world of other people outside your door. why kiss just one person when you could kiss anyone you meet? it’s just so freeing to not box yourself in like that.

so what the fuck are you doing here? with jongho’s arms wrapped around your waist like he never wants to let you go, your fingers laced in his hair like you feel exactly the same. it was just meant to be a one night stand, and yet you’re still here! you’re still at his house a week later. what the fuck is wrong with you?

“you have work, right?” jongho groans into your shoulder, pressing his soft lips to your skin just below your earlobe. it sets something alight within your, your heartbeat quickening and your stomach stirring. something so domestic would never have had that affect on you before, so why now? why with him? you push the question out of your mind and simply nod.

you do have work today, and maybe today will be the day that you go home to your own apartment, not jongho’s.

“do you want me to fetch you lunch?” he whispers, grazing his teeth against your earlobe in a way that sends shivers down your spine. you scrunch your eyes closed, trying your rid your mind of all the filthy thoughts that are suddenly racing through your brain. “is that a no?” he chuckles lowly in your ear, “or have you just got something else on your mind?”

something else entirely. a carnal need to stay home and let him take care of you like he has done every other day this week. what’s another sick day added to the list? you’re sure your boss must think you’re dying or something with the amount you’ve had off since that first night with jongho, yet you don’t seem to care.

and as he pressed another lengthy kiss to your neck, you find yourself not caring about the no relationship rule too. you can make an exception for the man that seems to have you brainwashed.

[mayasaura]

sorry if this has been answered before or if there's a post about this, but I've been seeing a lot of posts labeling harrow as schizophrenic and/or having trouble recognizing reality, including the one you just made about crux as harrow's caretaker and reality-indicator.

I realize that these interpretations come from htn, but I'm curious as why people feel that it's always been a trait of harrow's instead of a side effect of the lobotomy?

I was under the impression that she created the reality problems as an excuse to cover the blocks in her memory, especially since we know that wake/the sleeper didn't possess her until after gtn and most of her confusion happens in the river bubble.

even the "hallucinations" of the body don't really impact her perception of reality, and it's actually alecto's soul not a real hallucination. the only questionable moment I can remember is when she sees cytheria under the bed and ianthe says there's nothing there, but we know ianthe is a duplicitous legend so I read it as ianthe lying to harrow lol

long story short, I was wondering if there was scenes in gtn, ntn, or post-realization htn that indicate harrow has had these reality problems pre-lobotomy? or if you know of a post analyzing it further? sorry to throw this at you, I just haven't seen any analysis of it but I saw your post so I was hoping you would have more info :) I really adore all of your tlt analysis posts!

Hi! Yeah, if you go into my '#harrow's schizophrenia' tag, I've made several posts about it, and other people have added on to a few of them with further elaboration.

But I don't think I've ever laid it out fully like a thesis. And I have several stressful things I should be doing right now, so I can't think of a better time to get into it.

When Harrow's brain is editing Gideon out, there's an effect a little like a record skip. Her memory snags on something, very briefly, and then quickly moves on. Or she'll make an assumption or say something that doesn't actually make sense without Gideon in the picture, but she won't notice. The most prominent example is the details in chapter 3 surrounding her opening of the Tomb:

Just ellipsis "found out" ellipsis to skim over the very large part Gideon had to play in those events. If she were to interrogate the memory, it would be strange that she doesn't remember how her parents found out, but doing so would make her brain bleed. She would black out, and most likely forget what she was trying to remember.

And an example from the same chapter of a statement that doesn't make sense, unless you know about Gideon:

Two things are important about these examples, the first being that they don't upset Harrow. She doesn't think they're strange, because she barely thinks about them, which was sort of the point of the lobotomy in the first place. The second is that they can be immediately explained by plugging Gideon into the Gideon-shaped hole in Harrow's memory. If you know about Gideon, and what Harrow's done, there's no mystery remaining.

In contrast, there are other details in chapter 3 about Harrow's childhood that Harrow did, and does, find strange and upsetting.

Gideon didn't attend services, and she most definitely didn't participate in chants. Putting Gideon back in the picture does nothing to explain the "weird, thuddering beat" Harrow finds disruptive. But it does sound an awful lot like an auditory hallucination, as does hearing doors open and close where no doors were opening and closing.

Maybe we could try to explain the doors by supposing she was hearing Gideon coming and going without remembering the source, but that doesn't really track with how we know her mind processes the missing pieces. If Harrow were papering Gideon over in her memory, it wouldn't be important who was or wasn't opening doors and where. The focus of her memory would quickly shift, just like it did when trying to remember how her parents found out about the Tomb, in order to avoid looking at what she's hidden from herself.

Then there's the next paragraph:

Again, plugging Gideon into this memory does nothing to explain it. Even if Gideon had been in the habit of sneaking up behind Harrow and attempting to choke her out—which, yikes—Harrow has already seamlessly blocked out the memory of one attempted strangulation. Then there are the phantom ropes she sees, her parents' method of suicide haunting her.

The forgetting where she was, losing time, and false memories do seem at first glance like they could be explained by the lobotomy, seeing as that is sort of the whole purpose and effect. But I'm pretty sure even these are real memories. Again, because of the focus of her attention. She's remembering having forgotten, while the lobotomy make her forget to remember.

Then there's Harrow's overall behavior. Her reactions to her hallucinations, especially in the River bubble, which imply that not all of this is new to her. She isn't shocked, or caught off-guard. She has coping mechanisms. She's figured out what evidence she can probably rely on to rule out hallucinations, and what's more likely to be suspect. A lobotomy, even a necromantic lobotomy, doesn't come with built-in tools for coping with its effects. Her memory of her past without Gideon in it is fractured and incomplete, not an entirely new life story with new life lessons.

Finally, from Nona the Ninth, some evidence that Harrow's problems with reality definitely predate the lobotomy:

Crux remembers them.

[pricescancerstickk]

Platonic! Simon Ghost Riley x Young! Child reader

(Took a tiny break, this idea is a bit tw) *edited*

**[TW AND WARNINGS : MENTIONS OF CHILD SEXUAL ASSAULT, ABUSE, PHYSICAL AND VERBAL ABUSE, READER IS 7 YEARS OLD]

Your parents were never available or present ever since you were as young as a baby, it was very cruel and unfair and you were forced to grow up too fast for someone your size, Screaming yelling, bottles breaking and things falling over piercing and deafening your ears, the shouts from your father when you didn’t bring beer fast enough. The sound of the slap and your moms hand connecting to your little cheek after you didn’t clean the dishes. It was a dark world and you knew it all. It didn’t matter where you went Via school or home there was never a safe place for you except for Your Neighbors Home. Simon knew your parents as the three were childhood friends. Seperating in high school, Your dad was simons best friend. Your father was a hunter when he was in his youth and it was why he had a shotgun on display in his home, Simon was a lieutenant. Serving in military. A remarkable soldier of the SAS. Why was simons home a possible safe home? Sure he had only seen you once when you were 3 years old. A delicate cute baby. He missed rubbing your chubby red cheeks, he missed you secretly. Still having those pictures of you and him. Simon holding you in his arms, a Polaroid picture.

But when going back to the thought of school and your parents was unfair. They never bought you toys, never provided any comfort whatsoever and doing as much as looking or acknowledging you in their presence. Looking at you like a bystander examining a bug. The way they beat you after you made one little mistake…Awful. Your other relatives weren’t any better. You tried telling any staff or calling the police on how you got harassed and groped even by your older relatives. Nobody believe a word from you? Why? They just assumed you were spoiled or lying to get something that you wanted..You really weren’t, but alas. They couldn’t see that. Despite your little body all battered and bruised, coming into school in a weak state and all bandaged. Nobody batted one singular eye!

Eyes fluttering open as the alarm clock rang. Waking you out of your dazed and sleepy state, you rubbed your eyes and slipped your feet into the slippers. Walking to the bathroom, Grumbling softly. “I don’t wanna go to school today…” your hand rested atop the sink. Turning on the water. Washing your face, spreading toothpaste onto the tooth brush before brushing your teeth. Tilting your head making sure to clean thoroughly. Spitting out afterwards and washing up. You changed into your clothes and brushed your hair. Taking the pink flowery school bag with you. It was cheap. Small. But enough for you and it fit your school books and all that was necessary and important for you to bring to school. You tried to ignore your parents arguing, as always. Both drunk and hung over. Sparing you a glare as you walked to the school.

(A little of the pictures I found to describe what it’s like for little reader to be playing alone)

You opened up your locker and set some of your stuff inside. Taking a book but a foot connected to your back and you fell to the floor wincing. But catching a flash of your reflection on the metal handle of the lockers. Red puffy eyes, you’d been crying the entire night, forced to suck it up and bear with it while you can. You couldn’t understand why life was so cruel. You were only in the first grade. You heard laughing. But didn’t realize it’d been going on for a while as you zoned out. They chanted cry baby as witnessing the sight of those round eyes filling up the brim like a river with all those big round clear, Tears. “It’s not funny! Stop it!” They kept kicking you over and over as you cried. They couldn’t get anymore childish than hanging that ‘kick me’ sign onto your back. Snagging it off and grunting. Crying softly wanting the day to end already but hearing the bell ring after so many hours your eyes widened in relief. You left the class as fast as you could. Snatching the bag onto your back and rushing outside. Shaking in fear knowing coming back home wouldn’t be good either..What could you really do though? You couldn’t run away. You didn’t know where to go.

“Sweetheart?’ A voice called out shaking you and snapping you back to reality, turning around and seeing it was Simon. What was he doing here? “Daddy will be mad at me I-if he saw you with me si” you gently spoke up, voice shaky. Eyes about to tear up, His blue eyes filled with concern. His hair blonde and short. He gently took a knee. Kneeling infront of you and taking that flowery bag of your back and hoisting it over his shoulder. Taking you into his arm. Careful not to trigger anything, “How do you carry that bag darling? It’s a bit heavy ain’t it” Gently he murmured as you clung onto him like your entire life depend solely on Simon. “Can we go to your home?..” whispering caught him off guard but he recently found out what had been happening at home, he loved you too much to let it happen longer. He nodded along and his long legs moved around the floor. Walking you to his home. Hand in hand, seeing your outfit. It was childlike and innocent, matching your personality exactly, Blue hoodie with those pink like suspender pants it seemed, (idk how to describe but it’s gonna be similar to the picture idk???)

Setting you down gently on his couch as he sat beside you and wrapped you in a warm blanket easing all of your worries. Slowly wrapping you in a blanket burrito before putting you on his lap. Watching your eyes look into his pale-like ones, They softened further he looked at you. Long finger tracing your cheek, touching the scar on it with a gentle touch like a baby’s caress. A light graze “they’re monsters. You’re never going back to them, your staying with me. Sweetie” he reassured as you couldn’t hold back tears anymore and your tears stained his shirt. Hands clutching on the dark shirt. Eyes wide and sad. “T-thank you” crying sweetly and heart easing as his hand went to the back of your small head. Pushing it into his broad chest and stroking your hair back. Pushing the bangs away from your eyes. The height difference was massive. You couldn’t grow up fast. Never eating well and being starved and at the age of 7 you were really short, about 4 foot something. But Simon was one of those blokes. His British accent gruff. Phlegmy like but soft and stern. He was on the phone as he ordered the pizza later after letting you decide what you wanted to eat. He took it and set the box on the table. Offering a slice to you, you took it and gently stuffed it to your mouth. His finger wiping off the cheese that sprinkled onto your face. A light giggle emitting from you. “It tickles..” you murmured softly and ate. As you watched the cartoons on tv in pure bliss it wouldn’t be long before those shitty parents came to haunt you

Ring

Simon placed down the slice of pizza. Standing up and pulling his phone out his pocket. Seeing it was your dad calling and his heart sank tiny his stomach as he answered it he argued with your father on the phone violently. There was no way in hell Simon was giving you to those so-called ‘parents’. He hung up and sat next to you again, seeing you already finished eating surprised him. You were sitting there a second ago. You must’ve been really hungry. He panicked, as he didn’t see you? “Y/N sweetheart? Where did you go?” His voice raised lightly, startling you,

“I’m over here si!” You answered back softly. But he found you on the floor next to the table with the colorful plates and toy kitchen. Sitting on the floor. Eyes looking into his, and that he forgot to mention he bought you toys before you came here. He had thought this through and planned thsi without knowing. He kneeled next to you on the floor “Don’t scare me like that again Y/N” he ruffled your hair a bit, Simon’s blue eyes were sincere. His face was chiseled and you always called the jawline ‘lines on his face’ because you didn’t know the word ‘chiseled’, you yawned soflty after a while of playing, tired. He was on his phone checking the time, he looked up and saw you laying on your side. Asleep, throughout the day after he picked you up from school. “Will mommy be mad at me?” Those words echoed in his head. Reading him of mid day when he gave you a little bubble bath to wash the wounds and dirt off your body. You were really skinny and he took note to feed you more than you need to at times. In a good, healthy way. He hated how you shied away from his touch, how your eyes filled with fear if he almost walked to you too fast. He didn’t want to hurt you in any way. He’d feel like a monster. The way you flinched or shied away broke his heart and shattered it like no other. Despite his entire family dead and haunting Simon, he could cope with you. He had a terrible past aswell. And you were a ball of sunshine in his life. The ray of light and the little angel that saved him after his heart was too dark to let anyone in to love. He shed tears for you. A sign how much he cared for you. Your tiny peck on his cheek and your hands wiping away the tears and your compliments to him were sweet gestures showed how you were comfortable and safe with him melted his heart like no other. He was a giant teddy bear to you,

Not a while after you fell asleep in his arms. His chin resting atop your head and listening to the soft snores and head buried in his chest. Wrapped in the blanket. On his lap. Resting like a baby, finding the empty pizza box you both ate together laying on the floor. The tv playing cartoons you were watching earlier. He carried you to his bed. Laying you next to him, snuggling you and planting a kiss on your head before shutting his eyes. Falling asleep with you, making sure you were safe before he slept next to you, both nuzzled up.

[t0ast-ghost]

Season four of the boys is hitting my brain like a crowbar so I’ve got a couple more thoughts about the new episode

There’s gonna be spoilers for the episode, a bit of talk about the comics, and some only slightly bloody images, so be wary, be warned!

These are my thoughts during the first watch:

- When Butcher hit his head I actively gasped. My poor babygirl.

- I do like how they’ve made Becca meaner but essentially still her

- Frenchie. Break up with him.

- I’m glad Annie has more plot and scenes this season. I’m also glad that Firecracker is actually fucking with her. Their foundation is messy but the actual rivalry is coming together quite nicely

- “I had nightmares about that exact moment, and you can’t even remember it. It’s funny, isn’t it, how people can have such different memory of the exact same thing.” Oh my god this is such a good line. Like obviously not to the extremes of Homelander but kids can and will retain things that their parents won’t even remember. They make some parts of his character easy to understand because you can see that his actions are always impulsive and unhealthy and created by the ways he was raised and the environment he’s been surrounded by

- Okay that death was so so well done. It’s so emotional for Homelander because he’s seeing how people aren’t honest or caring until he’s threatening them. I can’t even try and decipher the “I forgive you” line because it’s so full of apathy

- Hughie and Kimiko teaming up is so special to me. I need more of them.

- HUGHIE GETTING V FOR HIS DAD??? CONFRONTING A TRAIN??? Discuss??? (There’s more thoughts later)

- Hughie saying that him and A-Train would be “good” if A-Train got the v for him is so heavy. It felt like Hughie trading Robin’s life for his dads. Or for his future? Like in order to move on he has to let go of Robin and that feels so awful

- I wanna state how easily and quickly they made me uncomfortable with Firecracker and The Deep singing. How is that so unreasonably uncomfortable?

- So uh. Yeah I’m not sure I wanna touch that scene…

- THEY PUT HUGHIE IN A SCREAM CHASE SCENE

- I literally screamed when Hughie killed him omg. This is what I’m here for omg omg my babygirl

(Here’s a behind the scenes stunt video on insta)

- Tala is so fair for that but when is she gonna become apart of the boys family?

- I think Annie is going to blow up. Like I think she will do something really bad.

- YEA BEAT HER UP ANNIE… okay maybe not the best decision but…

- WHAT THE FUCK

- Fun fact Homelander’s birth that Barbara describes is how Becca dies in the comics

- UM UM UM UM UM so uhhhhhh I suspected that Sage needed to give herself lobotomies for that reason (wish I said smt goddamnit) but I was not ready for a scene depicting a lobotomy that also implied it was like sex to her?

- Kimiko and Annie hug <333

- Hughie forgave him… now kiss

- “I don’t want to spend the rest of my life hating anybody” YESS that’s what this is about!!! How fucking contrasting Hughie and Butchers views are on the subject of revenge and superheroes. Their situations are so very different from the comics and I like that both of them are (somewhat) healing. Hughie’s forgiven A-Train and Butcher is just trying to get Ryan safe. It’s less about killing for both of them in the show which I love

- I paused to write that before the “there’s enough here to save you too” OH MY GOD NO. No no. Nonononono. No.

- Hughie’s face when getting coffee? Mwah! Give him little kiss

- HIS MOM. KNOWS. ABOUT. V!!?? I mean. They couldn’t kill off Simon Pegg. He’s Simon Pegg! Just kidding I totally thought he was going to die. I wonder if they’ll give him the same kind of quandary Hughie originally got in the comics when Butcher forcefully injected him with V

- Perfect ending for Homelander’s visit home.

Interlude:

So I haven’t started the rewatch yet but two things about some characters of the last three episodes that actually didn’t make an appearance in this one.

First off I don’t think I mentioned this in my last post but I really like what they’ve done with Noir. It’s an interesting and corporate way to bring back the character that makes a lot of sense in universe

Secondly there’s a theory I wanted to bring to people’s attention. This video on instagram has the theory that Kessler is like Becca and isn’t actually real. Which I think is really neat. I’ll take it either way but it would make a lot of sense if he wasn’t since he seems to hold a lot of negative traits that Butcher used to have and is trying to grow from

Okay I lied, third thing cause it just got brought to my attention again; everyone who is making fun of Laz Alonso shut the fuck up. Thank you. I won’t be taking criticism on this.

Onto the rewatch:

- The first shot is of different variations of Homelander’s costume. Pretty cool!

- Second shot has two pictures of Frank and Martin working in the lab with Frank’s picture framed by a newspaper thats article makes no sense but has a lot of key words and phrases (could just be gibberish idk) the title on a separate article from the same newspaper can be read as “Drama class wins award” other than that there’s also some kind of document that’s the same kind of gibberish but it caught my eye cause it says “-orthward gay” … not sure what this means…

Camera then pans down to reveal a memo and news clipping. The memo is from Barbara to the staff and talks about how anyone who breaks the confidentiality of Project Odessa will be terminated and prosecuted. The news clipping is more gibberish with the heading “Nervous system mystery revealed” by Greg Gilmore (by gibberish I mean the first couple sentences are “Had men rose from down lady able. Its son him ferrars proceed six parlors.” And then continues on like that)

- I actually love the horror movie situation they find themselves in. It’s a creepy basement lab. The security cams go out. Communication to the outside world has been cut off. Then the devil arrives in the elevator. It’s done so well, things are set up perfectly. There’s even a sign that says “All activities monitored by video camera” and a box with the words “fire safety plan” (could be foreshadowing or I’m just connecting non existent dots)

- The picture of young Homelander with the scientists. It’s so horribly terrible and amazing

- Fudgie the whale is their last meal :(

- titties ahem I didn’t really pay any attention to the shower scene last time. That’s a terrible shower head in my opinion, I don’t like the way it sprays water- OH WAIT THE WIRM IS IN HIS SPINE????? He’s also got a bullet wound in his back. He’s also got a lot of nice freckles on his back. Oh the way Becca sits on the edge and offers her hand and he reaches to take it but grasps the edge of the bathtub instead

- Hughie’s mom seems so fucking casual in the scene where they’re deciding whether to pull his dad’s feeding tubes. She’s too relaxed and almost smiling? At least with her eyes. A lot.

- OH YEAH Gen V mentioned!

- ANNIE I LOVE YOU!!! Look at her face after she burned the president!

- Seriously though such a good Annie moment. She’s so confident with this and marches into the presidents’ office with a plan but by the end of this it’s all backfired and taken away from her. It shows just how fucking much Firecracker ends up affecting her

- I’m not going to be nit picky and go on about how Colin should’ve noticed Frenchie’s ankle because obviously he’d be checking and Frenchie wouldn’t’ve known to hide it before. But I am going to say that’s a Count Olaf ass ankle shot.

- Oh I love how it seems like almost a sweet moment between Sage and Firecracker when she says “we gotta look out for each other” but now you know Sage fully intends for Firecracker to get beat up by Starlight

- I was trying to figure out why Sage got the Deep to do her lobotomy. It’s not that Sage trusts the Deep or even likes him but I think it really is just kind of transactional for her. Like she knows what he wants and what will keep him happy, he’s the only one she’s really made a connection with other than Homelander and Firecracker, and he is not likely to want anything else from her or blab about it. Somehow he is logically the best one to do it?

- It’s great how much Annie really really doesn’t want Butcher there. And neither does Frenchie. Or M. M. Damn, my babygirl has pissed off a lot of people

- Homelander’s theme is so so good. The lone violin does something to my brain. It highlights his isolation and intimidation and fear so nicely.

- I do not know how some people didn’t know Frenchie was queer? I thought it was actually very obvious that in cannon he is bi/pan and polyamorous. Maybe that was just me…

- Just realized how this episode we have both Hughie and Homelander forgiving people. Dots connected! 😃👍 (I’m not dissecting this right now, what do you think I’m an English major?)

- I love all the Hughie and A-Train moments. There’s so much history between them and it’s so present in those moments so it’s interesting to see them have to let it go to help each other because I think they both realize that they’re both fucked up people who are trying to be good and they ultimately relate to each other in a way I don’t think either of them realizes

- Kimiko telling Hughie to let his dad die, to not use the V, is so so strangely powerful coming from her. She understands what it’s like to have V forced upon you, and to be saved by it time and time again. And although she’s now choosing it, she sees how Hughie’s dad probably won’t end up like her and will find it to be a curse

- Hughie tripping is such a loser move (lovingly) like I thought he got shot in the leg or smt but no he just trips. Like the little fail boy he is.

- I love Kimiko showing Hughie how to fight someone and protect himself and then later helping him walk away (it’s a little funny just because Jack Quaid is really fucking tall). She also gives him the motivation of ‘it’s not just about your survival, it’s about your dads as well’ she wants him getting through this and I cannot handle when the boys show care to each other especially when it’s Hughie and Kimiko

- Homelander’s need to be loved is really really really well set up in previous seasons. It’s the only thing that could control him and he doesn’t know it’s even happening for most of his life because he doesn’t know how to ask for it. The environment he grew up in wouldn’t teach him that and the environment he’s put in pushes away and punishes emotion and care. He started off wanting a family from work because it’s similar enough to the lab but no one there has hurt him yet or appears afraid of him. But as he realizes he can’t gain their care, that he can’t make a family, he leans on the fact he can take most of what he wants. But not love. Not true care.

I think eventually he begins to think there’s something wrong with him, but rather than facing that idea (the idea that he’s unlovable) he pushes harder on the idea he is perfect. He is better. Furthering his decent and pushing everyone even further away.

- Butcher and M.M’s ‘time to fill the audience in’ lines caused me to look up what an enema is. And then left the rest to my imagination. First, fuck you! Second that’s a very good device to use because sometimes not showing and leaving it to the audiences imaginations is the most horrifying (it’s their own private horror show)

- I’m looking at the scene where A-Train and Ashley catch each other and I have a feeling it’s going to play out as either Ashley betrays A-Train to win Homelander’s favour, A-Train betrays Ashley, or they betray each other. I’m fairly certain Sage knows A-Train is switching sides so I wonder if she’ll have a plan for when he gets caught.

I also have a feeling that by the end of this season A-Train is either going to die in some horrible way (maybe by Hughie, maybe Homelander, maybe Butcher even) or he’s going to betray the Boys.

If A-Train does die (pls please do not kill him please) I’m wondering how they’ll do it because his death in the comics wouldn’t make sense here and I feel like SuperSonic’s death was already an homage to that

- I wonder if Ashley’s floater will have any consequences. Like they took the time to set it up. Will Homelander comment on it later?

- The way he says “you called me squirt silly” is so so aughhh. This is probably another moment that Homelander remembers that seems so inconsequential to Marty. He was watched and humiliated all of his childhood and then he gets this one thing to himself and when someone discovers it they laugh, adding so much more humiliation. Anyway I’m um skipping the rest of this scene until Barbara shows up.

- Can we take a second to appreciate how fucking well Nancy Lenehan plays the character of Barbara. There is still so much fear to her character but there is no bullshit, there’s a lot of control in a situation where so little is available. She’s cold while still giving a kind of stern mothering vibe. She explains the situation, all the gory details as facts. Starting with “put him out of his misery” to “they were scared”, you could have left, and you were killing from the moment you were born. She knows begging will get her nowhere but she’s still very very afraid.

- Babygirl moment I will never get over. He fought for his life, he kicked and shoved and he won. How this man is alive is a mystery to me but I’m so glad :)

- Tala finally got to say what she wanted to Kimiko but the look on her face as Kimiko leaves is so.. unsatisfied. It’s not over between them, and maybe it hurts that Tala now sees her being kind and caring because that’s not what she got when she first met Kimiko. Maybe she still wants to get that ice cream. Probably not. Just theorizing about her character. Lemme know what you think

- The worm looks like it’s struggling. Maybe Butcher’s life is connected to its life?

- This episode is kind of like one gory scene to the next. You get Hughie and Kimiko killing, then Annie beating the shit out of Firecracker, then Butcher blowing up Ezekiel, and then you’re back to Homelander’s whole fucking slaughter, then it’s Colin beating up Frenchie, THEN it’s a LOBOTOMY, then it’s a nice little hug awwwe

- Barbara’s monologue. I can’t even touch on that. It’s too much for my brain but I’ve been seeing a lot of good posts about it.

- My heart is full after the Hughie and Annie scene. It is so full of love. Fuck OFF Dakota Bob.

- Hughie and A-Train sittin’ in a tree! K-I-S-S-I-N-

- “You fucking dog wanker” actually Butcher its dog welder and I wouldn’t compare anyone, let alone Hughie, to him

- Hughie getting told by Butcher not to cure his dad is also really fucking sad. Karl Urban don’t kill Simon Pegg! Instead join the USS Enterprise-

- Daphne tries to get close to Hughie and he rejects her cause he doesn’t feel comfortable crying in front of his mom. Hughie stop being relatable.

- He’s really cute when he smiles. I get it. But he’s also committed atrocities. You cannot fix him. (Which man am I talking about? You’ll never know…)

Here’s a link to the first one because if you got this far I guess you enjoy me talking about this

I’ll probably continue talking about this so if there’s more you will find a link to the post here

[hobiinobs]

In the hallowed pages of Harrow the Ninth, there are 3 soups. I didn't feel like giving myself a lobotomy so functionally 2 soups. This was the information we were working with as today @alt-menu and I set out on a quest to make awful awful soup.

Ianthe's soup recipe goethe thusly:

"You cut up an onion, burn it at the bottom of the pot, put in a few vegetables, and then some meat. It won’t taste like anything, so put in a few teaspoons of salt, and then it’ll taste like a few teaspoons of salt."

Indeed a terrible recipe for soup.

The second of course was the famous Harrow marrow soup. Now we aren't given a direct recipe for Harrow's concoction but it is described so I made notes:

No salt

Translucent gold-white colour

White onions (unburnt) in wedges

Carrots

No vegetables that will dissolve over a long cook time

Too much water (added at the end in a panic after it thickened too much)

Root vegetables

Mostly vegetables Gideon the First doesn't like (I bet celery is in there)

Harrow's bone marrow

And so we set out upon our quest. Long story short, they had no bone marrow. So our quest to make both soups was dashed upon the rocks, but we decided to continue our quest to make Ianthe's horrible horrible soup.

(unrelated they had ostrich meat, so we got that for lunch)

Making the soup:

Cut veg shitily. Burnt onion.

Put in a few vegetables, then some meat.

Added water despite Ianthe not mentioning it because soup need liquid yknoe

Put in a few teaspoons of salt.

And then let it cook for a while, whilst we cooked the ostrich.

And so the time came to taste the "soup"

Twas bad, Ianthe was wrong it did not taste like a few teaspoons of salt, it tasted like burnt onion and meat water, pretty obvious in hindsight but it had to be done. Needless to say don't follow Ianthe's soup recipe.

However ostrich meat, very tasty, it's like a mix of pork and duck, honestly went hard.

Thank you and good morrow

[sleepyfan-blog]

Rotten Hope (1)

Author’s note: Part one of the Typhus x Reader fics. I blame you all for the botflies that have spawned because of this.  Next

Tagged: @ms--lobotomy @egrets-not-regrets @the-pure-angel @whorety-k @gallifreyianrosearkytiorsusan

Warnings: fictional illness, quarantine, bodily fluids, body horror, vomiting, please ask me to tag anything that makes you uncomfortable that I missed

Summary: Illness ravages the sector you’ve been quarantined in. Desperate for help as supplies dwindle, you psychically reach out to a nearby Astartes Librarian, who promises to bring aid.

word count: 2, 677 words

In your centuries of life, you’d seen many things. Glorious heights and dizzying lows…  But this creeping, miserable sickness that weakened the bodies and minds of the non-perpetual humans around you was a whole new kind of awful that you’d have been happy to have never seen ever. You’d established yourself on this world as a mid-level rogue trader before the quarantine had gone in place. You were wealthy, yes, but not Very Well Known, as your perpetual nature might attract the attention of the Inquisition, and you’d spent long enough dodging their knives and gang-pressing into their service last century, thank you very much. 

You’d funded the research project into trying to combat and cure the horrible illness that started as excessive lethargy and the inability to focus on any one task for more then a handful of minutes. After a week or two of low energy, the person afflicted with this disease would suddenly get a strong burst of energy and the desire to go out and interact with as many people as possible, alongside a minor cough and the occasional but regular sneeze. After a week of increased energy, a terrible fever would strike, alongside a bright red rash that appeared across an afflicted person’s back, neck and shoulders.

The rash was incredibly itchy and, if scratched, oozed puss that was highly contaminated and spread the illness just as quickly as sneezing or coughing directly on another person did. It took another week for the rash to spread fully across an afflicted person’s body, with pustules appearing wherever a person scratched that often burst painfully, before regrowing. Within a month over half of the total population of the world you’d been visiting had caught the illness and were suffering through one of the first three stages of the illness. That was when the planetary governor instated the quarantine, even as the rash spread across her cheeks and faces, enforced by the arbites and the astra militarum in hazmat gear.

The governor had also sent out a shelter in place order, with rations being delivered to the shelters of the living at regular intervals, to further discourage anyone from breaking the stay in place order. Those who did not have permanent housing of their own were put up in hotel rooms for no cost. The medical and medical research staff on world who had not fallen to the illness were working frantically to come up with either a cure or at least a treatment that would delay the onset of further symptoms…

Especially as after the pustules on an afflicted person’s body had burst and reformed over half of their skin, they had to be put in full-body restraints, as otherwise the altered mental state that the sickness-afflicted person went into was both violent and difficult to stop with anything less than using lasgun rounds to each of their joints and melta-flames to prevent the gushing spurts of puss that sprayed from those wounds from covering everything in a ten foot radius in grey, highly infectious bodily fluids that stunk so badly of rot and death that made anyone improperly attired vomit. While in this violent state, if the infected person or people weren’t properly restrained, they tried to infect as many people as they could by forcibly trying to smear the puss into the eyes, mouth, or nose of any uninfected they could reach.

You’d used your contacts made as a Rogue Trader to desperately call for aid in combatting this illness… There was also the fact that, should things continue as they were, within about six months, all of the emergency stores of rations would be depleted, as the ill still needed to be fed, no matter how violent they became. Not that the sick seemed to be able to die of the infection itself - the only fatalities that had happened were due to the arbites having to kill the infected who broke free of their restraints and tried to infect the healthy.

You… You weren’t sure the fact that the sick weren’t able to die of the illness that ravaged their bodies and minds was a good thing, especially as both medical supplies and rations began to run low. You’d contacted your friends and allies you’d made as a rogue trader and found out that the fucking Inquisition had declared the entire system a no-go zone. Oh, the callous bastards were watching as the healthy of this and the other five living worlds scrambled and tried to keep themselves from succumbing to the illness they were trying to research a cure or at least treatments to ease the worst of the symptoms… But they refused to send so much as an unmanned ship of medical or standard rations, much less anything that would truly help the situation.

Bastards!

You did have ways of sending encoded messages to others that the Inquisitors who were heartlessly watching the people of this system suffer and break under the onslaught of this illness couldn’t intercept and stop. While you were still wary of the genetically altered creations of Neoth’s, you were keenly aware that many of the Adeptus Astartes who roamed the stars did try to protect humanity to the best of their abilities and many of them despised the Inquisition and would come to help in order to spite whichever Ordo of the inquisition was withholding aid to this system… Doing so, however, required that you use some of the psychic gifts that you used as sparingly as possible, in order to avoid detection as the powerful psyker you were.

Dodging curious Astartes Librarians was a small price to pay for aid for the mortals suffering in utter agony all around you… Which was why you settled down into a meditative pose, sitting comfortably on your ship, the murmurs of your frightened crew and anxieties a background hum that you needed to ignore in order to reach out psychically. You had been on semi-friendly terms with Neoth before he’d been interred onto the Golden Throne and did your best to guide humanity towards a better future in whatever ways you could… You also had the verifiable command codes that would prove you were a high ranking - if secret - member of the Imperial Hierarchy when you came into contact with an Astartes Librarian. 

You began your psychic search for an astartes librarian with caution - aware that the Inquisition had their own psykers and you had no desire to reveal yourself to them if at all possible. Time passed as you searched for the particular blend of determination, training and psycho-indoctrination that marked an Astartes Librarian, your mind wandering further and further from your body. 

You could not say how long it took you to find him, but he was a powerful psyker, and held the strict discipline of an Astartes. You lightly tapped on his walls - a silent request to speak, making sure that your pressure against his mind was just enough to be felt, while just as clearly also not being an attack of some kind. 

Less than a second passed before his mind focused on you. You could feel the way his mental presence shifted and stretched, grabbing a rough hold on your consciousness, turning you this way and that, buzzing with confusion and curiosity - and a little bit of indignance that a stranger would dare touch his mind in such a way.  {WHO ARE YOU? WHY ARE YOU REACHING OUT TO ME?} He eventually sent coherently.

You explain who you are, giving the psychic imperial codes that would prove who you were as well, before explaining {The inquisition refuses to allow any aid to come to the system I am in. A terrible illness has infected over ninety percent of the populations of the system I am in. The remaining healthy people are doing their best to try and find a cure or at least treatments for this disease. I am immune, but that’s because I am a perpetual. The immunity I enjoy is not something I can share with others.}

The Astartes Librarian’s mind surged back and forth, thoughts and emotions swirling together in a chaotic hurricane that you could only catch bits and pieces of, though you were trying not to peer too deeply into his mind - it was rude to do that without permission after all - and tried not to get overwhelmed by the intensity of his presence. {And so you sought me out because?}

{Most Astartes and the Inquisition do not get along for… Many reasons. I sought to call for help from an astartes whose mind I could communicate with. Please… the mortals are suffering terribly, though the illness does not seem to let them die…} You plead, offering up the memories you have of the terrible illness ravaging through the near half-dozen worlds.

The screams of the deeply afflicted as they throw themselves bodily at the healthy. Teeth and puss smearing against glass and plastic face plates. The awful coughing and sneezing. The low medical supplies and even fewer rations and food that was edible. The fact that the disease had mutated and afflicted the livestock and domestic animals, causing further vectors of infection and misery. 

{You are a perpetual Rogue Trader, mm? Caught between this illness and the Inquisition, unable to help, unable to flee. Very well. You’re in luck. I am in command of many brothers, and our… Specialty allows us a unique perspective into the nature of illness. We can bring all the aid these mortals needs. But in exchange, you will come with me, without fuss, without fighting. I have never met a perpetual before, except for the Emperor Himself, and I am… Curious.} Teh Atartes rumbles, his mind still wrapped tight around yours. 

You sense he has a number of motives he is hiding from you… But you’re also quite certain that he believes that he is telling the truth when he says that he can help the mortals suffering and agonizing in rotting, miserable stasis all around you. {Yes, I promise to go with you and your brothers without fuss after the people here are healed and well taken care of.}

The pleased rumble he makes and the way his mind caresses yours before letting you go back to your own mind makes you shiver and warmth suffuse through you {I look forward to our meeting, perpetual. You will know when I arrive with my brothers. If my younger brothers give you trouble, tell them that Typhus asked you, little Isha, to come to him.}

You’re not sure why his name - and the name Isha - bother you.  Warning bells ring faintly in the back of your mind, but you can’t quite place why. That and the desperation to get actual help fuels your relief {I understand. About when do you anticipate on arriving?}

{Again, you’re in luck, lovely flower. I and my brothers should arrive within the next month. Two on the outside, if the Inquisitors at the edges of the system you are in actually prove troublesome.} The astartes promises. Something buzzes beneath the surface of his mind, but you do not press, grateful beyond words for his aid. His mind squeezes around your tightly. His rifling through your memories is a little rough, and catches you off, as he gets from you where you are in the galaxy. {Yes, I will be there soon. The mortals’ torments will soon be at an end. You should return to your body, I can sense your exhaustion.}

You grumble a little to yourself, but he’s not wrong. This kind of extended mental contact with another person over such long distances in space is wearing on you. You withdraw from his mind and tumble back into your own body before exhaustion drags you into sleep.

“My lady! My lady, Lord Angels have arrived, and have been distributing food and medical aid to the sick and injured. They… Their armor is rather terrifying, I’ll admit, but their aid has been nothing but true and good. Their first captain has asked to speak with you, as soon as you are able.” Your second in command called out, between knocking rapidly on the door to your personal quarters, waking you out of the troubled dream that had been tormenting you.

Gilded flames had lapped at your feet, threatening to consume your body as creeping green rot choked your lungs and turned the mortals you’d been working alongside to agonized piles of mush and misery. You mentally shook yourself as you respond “I’ll be out to meet him as soon as I get dressed properly! Tell him I’ll be ready in about fifteen minutes.”

You’re already stumbling out of bed and over to your extensive clothes’ closet. Considering the direness of the situation, you hope that the lord angel would forgive the fact that you’re going to be wearing simple clothes beneath the hazmat suit that while you do not need, you wear anyways when going outside, so as to not bring the disease back and potentially infect the mortal crew around you. You pick out a simple shirt and pants combo, along with sensible lslhoes that will fit inside the boots of the hazmat suit, not bothering with any make-up or jewelry, dressed well enough in under five minutes.

It takes three minutes for your to sprint your way through the ship, everyone else clearing way for you to get to the cargo hold, slugging back a small shot of recaff and breakfast rations handed to you by your SIC just before you get suited up into the hazmat suit (Which takes most of the remaining time you told the first captain you’d need to be ready to see him). Just as you step out of your ship, you ask your loyal and stalwart second in command “Which chapter are they from?” Depending on which chapter they were from, you could have a guess as to what the first captain might want of you.

“They say that they are part of the Death Guard legion, ma’am.” Your second in command revealed, oblivious to the bone-deep panic and horror washing through you. “I don’t recognize their markings or heraldry, but they’ve been an enormous boon so far.”

No! No no no… “Have any of you taken anything that he Death Guard has offered you? No matter how small?” You ask, terror and failure acrid tastes in your mouth. How had you not noticed the taint of chaos in his mind at the time? 

“Not yet, as our stores have been fine. Is something wrong, ma’am?” He asks, a worried frown appearing on his face. He can see the fear in your face.

Damn, need to work on your mask, which you quickly put on, radiating confidence “OH… I just… don’t accept anything they give you,  if possible. As soon as I start talking to the first captain, take off and activate the warp drive and get as far away from this system as possible. I can… I can guess what they want with me, and as of now, I am resigning my duties as a Rogue Trader. Everything I own, all of my titles, rights and responsibilities I bequeath to you. FLy far, and fly well.”

“W.. What? My lady? I won’t just leave you-” He splutters. 

You shake your head angrily and hiss “I was the one who contacted them, believing them to be angels! But they are not! They are demons! They feed on  illness and misery, delighting in strive and causing Chaos wherever they go. I have gotten their foul attention and cannot escape, but you and our crew have a chance to escape. Please, take it. I will endure.” 

“I… As you command, my lady. I’ll begin preparations to leave now.” Your former second in command acknowledges, bowing his head forward, trembling a little in the fear that you can’t allow yourself to feel as you leave your ship, walking toward your grim fate with your head held high, despite your trembling hands.

[darkwitchingflower]

Things my friends have said as percy jackson characters pt. 5/6 idk I've lost count again

Apollo/Lester: I have an idea for you: thank you Apollo for blessing my life with your godly presence. Your meat wand is a blessing this summer as its size will provide shade for us all 😍 (friend not on tumblr)

Leo?: EVEN IF I HAVE TO DRAG PIPER(?) OUT THE HOUSE BY HER UNICORN HAIR (friend not on tumblr)

Leo: It's yeasting time!

Percy: Nico I am both amazed by you and concerned (@wraith--2)

Nico: What'd I do now? I'm really confused (me)

Percy: The whole dissolving your hand and drinking it (@wraith--2)

Nico: Oh ye I forgot about that (me)

Apollo: Why is a femboy stronger than me? (Friend not on tumblr)

Piper: Ladies and gent, let's pierce our flaps! (Friend not on tumblr)

Thalia: Why am I asexual? Well I decided to f*ck with depression and it f*cked back (@wraith--2)

Annabeth: I full support pettiness when it's due. It's like sass with emotional damage

Leo: My honka wonka bandonkas are just supreme in size what can I say? (Friend not on tumblr)

Piper: 😘 (me to @wraith--2 )

Annabeth: Piper, behave yourself around the asexual (best friend not on tumblr)

Nico: Corpses can't forgive. Silly bi*ch (@wraith--2)

Leo: Grab the robotomy it's time for a lobotomy (me)

Percy: Their all gonna pay for messing with my shrekie poo (friend not on tumblr)

Percy: Leonardo cappachrio (best friend not on tumblr)

Will: It's a bit too straight in here I gotta take my socks off.... you're allowed to make love to the homies as long as you have socks on (best friend not on tumblr)

Grover: Thank you for the balls (I meant maulteasers, this is also said by me)

Piper: If they (men) can have their penises out why can't we (women) (me)

Piper shivers*

Jason going to hug her: aw you cold? (Me)

Piper: ye my nipples are hard (best friend not on tumblr)

Leo: Simba, the sacrifice (best friend not on tumblr)

Playing human fall flat:

Piper: Let's kiss! (Best friend not on tumblr, she's piper in all of this interaction)

Our characters head butt*

Annabeth: how much do I owe you? (Me)

Piper: sssshhh pain will be over soon!

Annabeth: oh ok

This interaction is the same people as above with same characters

Piper: I'll get it out for you, baby girl

Annabeth: Is it in?

Leo: Don't grab my butt that costs money (best friend not on tumblr)

Dionysus, idk who else to put lol: God of wine and insanity... otherwise known as me last weekend (best friend not on tumblr)

Annabeth: The f*cking duck that asked the same f*cking man every f*cking day for some f*cking grapes when all he f*cking sold was some f*cking lemonade and then when the f*cking man brought the f*cking duck to a f*cking store to buy some f*cking grapes the f*cking duck asked DOES THIS STORE SELL F*CKING LEMONADE (Best friend not on tumblr)

Percy: Yeup, that's the duck (me)

Annabeth: AND YOU THINK HES EDUCATED?! (Best friend not on tumblr)

Percy mahbe in the labyrinth?: BE WAREY! I hear a worm... (@carpcranium)

Annabeth explaining the difference between a horse and pegasus: ...but they're not allowed to fly because horse* racism (@indecisivenb )

*the actual quote is bird racism but saying horse made it fit better

Nico: Don't worry, if the ghosts don't ghost you I will 🫡 (@wraith--2)

Leo: Tf2 heavy weapons guy is kinda hot (friend not on tumblr)

Percys dyslexia getting in the way of wording something*: He's rubbing off against me (@duckbakery)

Piper: I'm being blackmailed with my biggest weakness; gay people (@indecisivenb)

Jason: We are not getting yeast infections in my house, Leo (friend not on tumblr)

[controversial-blorbo-bracket]

Controversial Character Tournament Round 2: Kromer from Limbus Company vs Anders from Dragon Age 2

(remember that these characters are fictional and your fellow tumblr users are real. please be normal in the notes, i will not hesitate to block if you harass people)

Propaganda under the cut:

Kromer:

HATE: - "Nasty, scrungly, murders people for having advanced prosthetics, but yet the fandom still loves her, I will never understand that"

Anders:

LOVE: - "So Anders blew up a chantry as a symbol of mage rights. He's wild. Completely feral. I love him so much. He's canonically Bipolar (like me) but it's written in the worst possible way. He is possessed by a demon, technically. He's so unhinged. So many people hate him. He is technically a terrorist. The later game literally changed it so even if you agreed with him, no you didn't" - "hes SOOOOOO." - "He has a controversy page on wikipedia (It is not about that time he blew up a church). He likes cats. He gives poor people free magic healthcare. There is so much discourse about him all the time. His writer hated him. He escaped a cult. He's canon bipolar AND bisexual. He's possessed by a spirit of Justice (who rocks so hard.) He hates the Catholic Church. He lives in a sewer. He's really mean and petty. He was put in solitary for a solid year. He's one of two openly queer (i.e. mentioning it outside player romance) companions (the other being Isabela Dragonage) in his main game. Anders isn't even his birthname, it's a nickname given because he didn't speak for months when he got taken to the Catholic cult prison at 12. He drank long-lasting poison to fight an evil corrupting force because he wanted to not be murdered or have all his emotions lobotomied from him by the Catholic church prison guards (This is almost completely unrelated to the possession.)" - "Anders! He's a medic for those too poor to afford healthcare! He loves cats! He has a cat named Ser Pounce-a-Lot because he's a perfect man. Anders absolutely says ACAB, except in DA2 it's ATAB: All Templars Are Bastards. He's canonically bi! He runs an underground railroad-type deal for mages to escape from abusive institutions! He blew up the in-universe Catholic church for opressing his people (mages)! Some say this makes him a terrorist. I say this makes him a babe ❤️❤️❤️ He is unreasonably mean to Fenris, but imo that's just Bad Writing we can handwave away ok? ok. cool." - "there is a controversy section on his wiki page bc his bisexual ass made the straight male gamers angry by flirting with their characters. ppl in the fandom have also been arguing nonstop for 12 years abt his actions at the end of da2. do u want to go to anders discourse? too bad we're going to anders discourse."

BOTH: - "I really liked Anders in Dragon Age Awakening, I thought he was fun and funny, but he's insufferable in da2 and his fans and apologists are so annoying. He's a terrible person in that game and they have to make stuff up and ignore all the awful stuff he says and does. He's so awful I always kill him at the end of the game because I hate what he became."

[34saveme34]

I don't exactly- have answers as we speak

but they way 4 had been acting is really interesting to me

I might rewatch stuff but I really feel like there's so much brewing in SMG4

ALSO??? NEW ATTRACTION??????? WHAT NEW ATTRACTION?????? W H E R E IS THE 2ND FLOOR??? THE SECRET ROOM????

also it's probably not just me but 4 has been making that like, type of face with a very specific vibe

each time he does I feel so uncomfortable- like there's something wrong with him

as I'm looking at it right now, it could do with so much

it could do with his lobotomy which would honestly make for a good miniarc! Almost like yknow, reinserting his meme lobe wrong made his brain do some funky shit or something and inducing him to Create Perfection or something

then again we didn't see Puzzles in a bit

not to say I'm like, impatient, I'm not one of those fans, I just wonder if PV episodes have a schedule or not

also if they're the reason we don't get wednesday episodes

which. ngl would make me really sad

I'd rather get wednesday eps than PV eps I'll be real

besides he came back early, should've made us believe he actually died for longer but they had no self control about it

anyways another possibility, which might be taking tiny lines but

considering Puzzles saying he could make SMG4 the show his own, the removal of "SMG4:" from titles could. easily coincide

I'm saying it's not 100% but it WOULD make sense and if they like, wait more before dropping shit on us about it too fast, it could make for a really good 2nd phase of the Puzzle saga and maybe he could actually prove to us face to face this time that he isn't just the bumbling idiot we've seen him as lately

like now THAT would be interesting!

although the whole tease of "it's gotta be perfect" look, guys,... fellow bloggers.... I hate to say it but they could be playing w us

like right now I don't see how a Perfect thing could be fitted into what we have right now

you're like "what? but he has been obsessing with his videos!!" yeah but there's a specific way about it

especially in this he was less "it's gotta be perfect" and more "It's gotta be all mine" like he was crazed, catching memes

this is like, entirely new of him and I don't think it's a Perfect thing, genuinely

for one, if it is, redditors would come out with the "we keep having repeats of the same character development"

but also like- Idk- if you wanna disagree with me, sure, it's not like I fully dismiss the idea wholly anyways

but it IS pretty stupid to have the SAME character development twice

especially from such a great movie as Perfect

however, gay crack ass idea of 4 going crazy over stuff to try and help 3 get enough traction that his café can take off again

I mean we saw that again, the episode was basically just Leggy, 4 being fucking off the shits and 3 stuff

the whole acting thing and also the café still doing damn awful

and I do think the idea of 4 going crazy over helping 3 would be so so comical and would be really hard to give a heterosexual explanation for! Which makes it pretty Perfect :3

[mossy-green-aka-ferrythem]

The new W Corp Event definitely has caused me to think a lot more deeply about W Corp...

...and how its stagnation shows something of a bit of hope in the city. That absolute cruelty cannot be absolutely sustained.

I think the big thing is how while Lobotomy Corporation's dissolution and the plan Ayin carried out was meant to be the thing that changed everything, really Angela's choices made it so it wouldn't go through.

But here's the thing. Angela may very well be the strongest of all of them.

She withstood eternity.

She saw those who couldn't withstand it in the WARP, and was disgusted.

I think what makes the eternity in the WARP Trains so just, awful is that the residents of The City sort of live without hope.

They won't connect with one another, if they do it is in a broken and warped way. The connection is either made with violence, or through desperation, like they truly don't like the idea of connection, or have such a conservative idea of it that you end up with scenarios like "Love Town".

Even in the recent event, you see that one of the only way someone can take pleasure in this sort of eternity, is to treat it as a banquet. A kingdom. Cannibalism. I believe that W Corp can be linked to a thematic cannibalism. The metaphor here doesn't have any warmth though, it's a cannibalism of the human spirit.

We see this in the Sinners W Corp IDs.

Notice how the light has so clearly left their eyes?

Hong Lu's demeanor rings incredibly hollow, his smile having the most false appearance out of all his IDs. Don Quixote's joyful spirit has been crushed. Faust in this world feels like a very sorrowful being, sort of making one think about Faust as a more sorrowful character. That Fausts like W Faust exist, existing in such a jaded, hopeless state. Meursault does what he must do for the Wing, but I would imagine he is totally lost because of that. Ryoshu seems to delight in the halls of gore, but I don't think this is a good thing, if anything it shows her totally going off the deep end, and Outis seems like she's become completely lost in her Odyssey...

All of which have been sort of devoured by the cruelty of it all. That they cut apart and put back together pieces of their fellow humans in such a way. It feels different than the death that follows the war-like environment of the general city, because most of these people were normal. Most of these people could have been parents, with children. They could have been truly upstanding individuals, they could have been many things...

However, since the people of the City lack hope, lack warmth, lack pleasure, they cannot withstand eternity. They cannot withstand impossibly slowed time. They cannot do any of it, and will only be consumed.

However... this cruelty... all the time of all the people sent off on the WARP Trains...

It seems like a fairly recent invention all things considered...

Even if the time by now is enough to wrap around the entire history of life on Earth by now, spent in the WARP...

There is something about the idea that. It can end. People don't take pleasure in this. It brings out the worst of The City in such a drastic way, that surely it cannot be sustained...

That and the collapse of Lobotomy Corporation has just been a net positive for. Everyone.

Just look at how the Sephiriah are in Ruina! Look at how Angela found herself! Look at how they still stand, looking at the city, representing a new beginning, a new hope!

The eternity in those trains may be awful, but there is a way through it all... it will end one day... just like how the eternity in those trains end...

Just like how they have found entire WARP Trains full of people holding hands... there is a way through it all, there is still humanity in the wake of all this madness...

Hell just. Look at how Don Quixote knew how the Bloodfiend would have these people fade away, never to return. She would rather face eternity than to accept a scenario where these people never come back, and that is quite powerful.

Really it is all so interesting. Horrific beyond belief, but so interesting...

[thottyimagines]

a second top five fucked up Naruto things?

ooo a 6-10, if you will. Here's the top 5.

More supremely fucked up things in Naruto:

The whole Hyuuga thing is terrible, awful, wretched. The vast majority of the clan are enslaved to the main branch. On top of that, they can be made to experience extreme pain whenever a main branch member wills it. Everyone finds out about it and nothing happens.

ROOT, as a whole, was once sanctioned by the powers that be. No one made any real moves to stop it once Hiruzen vaguely decided it shouldn't be a thing anymore. Having children kidnapped, branded, and then made to carry out the most heinous of missions is...terrible, at the least.

Everything about Jiraiya, frankly. We are introduced to him as a huge and powerful pervert (so what are the people he pervs on supposed to do?), he steals money from Naruto after failing to provide him with any sort of love and support despite apparently being his godfather, then he goes on to...perv over women and, uh, kind of contain the nine-tails for a few years. Then we're supposed to feel terrible, just terrible, about his death.

The whole Gaara thing in Suna is pretty fucked up. He was sealed before he was even born, and the seal sucked. He was blamed for the seal sucking, he was viewed as a total monster instead of a conduit of a chakra demon doing its thing, then he got a lobotomy from Naruto. His ending is a little too tidy, and I fear that things will continue to suck.

Kind of revisiting, but...Everything to do with the Uchiha massacre is horrendous. These people are driven to the edges of the village because the rest of the villagers fear the power that none of them can harness to take over the Kyuubi. They deal with years of being shunned. They decide that this doesn't sit right. An extremely young boy, Itachi, finds this out, and his cousin who also knows this information ends up dying in extremely suspicious circumstances. The indoctrinated teen decides to go to the village, and the village tells him what to do. I covered this in the other post, but the lead-up deserves a separate breakdown here.