#the team has been on tumblr for over 9 years

[bearotonin-international]

First, I love bears and I'm glad to have found this account

Second, I hope you notice my username has "bear" in it

Thanks friend! And yes, we did notice. But we can’t help but also notice that’s a.. uh… very strange looking…. bear? you got in your avatar

[charmedreincarnation]

Ya bitch got into the void state

Champagne anon here and your mf girlll got in the mf void state and manifested her dream life. This happened a week ago, and I’ve been chilling but I do wanna share my story to help others. Gotta give Thanks to Maya, and so many other bloggers and even anon. Y’all hoes will forever be in my heart, and I’m forever grateful 🥹 also Maya girl you told me when I succeed to get into detail and I got nothing to do for the next two hours so imaaa just share it all here in detail.

I also wanna especially thank all the black creators on tumblr!! I didn’t know there were so many of us using the law. It always seems the world is so against us, and there’s nothing we can do abt it but nahhhh!! we can all live our best melanated lives regardless. Periodt, as we should it’s about goddamned time after everything we’ve been though 😂

Anyways!!!! after reading this: https://www.tumblr.com/charmedreincarnation/717864613626134528/im-your-bubble-anon-but-i-made-this-burner-to success story yesterday I got hella motivated. I read that shit and I thought I posted it on accident because it was everything I had been through, and had been thinking anyways. That anon ate your tumblr habits btw. If y’all haven’t seen my good sis’s sucess post go check that shut out rn, On god it will help.

At the end that anon (my mf dawg 🙏) included that they manifested for everyone. Now ion know if that shit actually work tbh. I’ve seen people say you can and can’t, but tbh the vibes were too high for me to doubt. I was like ight, okay fuck it, ima leave my dream life. Whether it me, that anon, or the devil himself ion give a fuck.

So that’s whatssss a bitch did!!! I just affirmed all day it was very fulfilling. People who hate on affirming are mad corny. I can’t lie that shit works hella fast even if you don’t believe it. Idk if that anon’s void manifesting helped or what but I didn’t do much and after 3 months of trying I entered the damn void state. I’m mad I thought I had to be on some ghandi shit to do this (no hate to him hes da man) but you rlly don’t y’all. BUT LEMME TALK MY SHIT ALL YOU NEED IS AFFIRMING AND PERSISTENCE.

Anyways I went go bed excited asl!! I wrote my script that was like 10 pages long I can’t lie I did the most… but it’s whateva. I woke up in the void state after waking up at 4 am or sum, and i was like oh shityyyt lemme manifest rq and skrttt out this hoe. So that’s what a mf did 😂😂

Anyways the part y’all’s is waiting for. This is what ya girl manifested

Desired face and body. I was in shock how all the details came to life. Y’all im a solid 100/10 it’s giving natural bbl and Aliyah. I swear to gahhh everywhere I go people be trying to peep. I’m not used to being treated like a fucking celeb everywhere I go, whole time it’s just my fat gyattttt

Being the hottest 16 yr old IT GIRL at my school, and having lucky girl syndrome. People call me a mini jayda wayda, but tbh I’m better than her now. No hoe is ever gonna cheat on meee like they did her…bye. She’s still gorgeous as fuck tho

Perfect school life. Your girl is set to be the Valedictorian when I graduate (my school has 4!) I’m also sophomore year President, captain of the basketball team, apart of some volunteer programs through my school, and so much more. My resume and college application is abt to be so fuckin fire in 2 years. As I should Columbia is a competitive ass school 😤😤 that aside everyone always tryna link, I got 3 guys fighting over me (whole damn love square), so many people tryna be my friends, teachers love me, and I excel in everything I do.

My Family being rich assss fuck. My dad got a Wikipedia now and his net worth is 22 million dollars. He owns a hedge fund company now, we love a man in finance 😍😍 AS HE FUCKING SHOULD. He got a material gurlll daughter. Two in fact now.

Fire ass crib. Bro it’s a 9 million dollar penthouse, perfect for ragers. I woke up here and my room is decorated to my personality, pintrest clothes all in my closet, I got an exotic pitbull and frenchie, and the house is just mad clean and fire, I’m obsessed with it. Rarely ever wanna leave now.

My mom not being strict. That bald headed ass hoe use to be mad annoying. Y’all know how Haitians are. Mad annoying as fuck and strict for no reason. Now I go out everyday and come home at midnight and no one gives a fuck. Everyone minds their own business as they should.

Having an older brother and younger sister. I was an only child, because I was a miracle baby bc my mom was infertile. Now she got 3 of us, so she can stop being only in my buisness. I’m just playin I love my mom regardless she’s just hella clingy. Anyways my brother is mad protective but also be wrestling mad aggressive for no damn reason. He gave me a bruise but it’s whateva Ima get my lick back. I also always wanted to be an older sister, bc I’d love to be a role model! My sister is 10 and adores me soo much it’s so adorable 🥹 lmfaooo, she’s mad spoiled by me and my mom but it is what it is.

Successful lip gloss business and being a successful drop shipper. Now you didn’t think a sista wasn’t gonna give herself a career just because I’m young right 🤨🤨 we’ll ya wrong. Ya girl is making 200k-400k a year. I barely even use my money cause I got an allowance from my parents… but still, financial literacy and wealth is so important to me especially as a black woman.

A pookie bae. Y’all know I wasn’t gonna deal with finding a loyal cute and funny guy in nyc. It’s like finding a needle in a haystack. Anyways I got me a fine ass boo. I just wrote down all the features I wanted in him like for exampleS finically secure so he can spoil me, handsome as fuck, tall, funny asl, kind, little clingy, deep raspy voice, nice hand, good hygiene and style,yanno yanooo !!! Plus some other shit and whewww the void did me so good. Nowww my boo bear is a lil cracker and I’ve never dated a white boy befuh but my am I surprised. I wake up everyday with some long ass appreciation texts and plans already made ! Y’all know I love me a dominant man who knows what he wants. He’s got some nice ass clothes, nice car and crib, made me a passenger princess and spoils me way too much. He doesn’t complain abt my mood swings and simps in the best way possible. Not to mention he’s fine afkkk he’s giving vinnie hacker. He’s also 6’1 and I’m 5’1 so that height difference is soooo hot I can’t lie I feel so so safe with him 🫣 I could go on all day but in short he’s more than perfect

+ so much more but this is what shocked me the most. Anyways I’ve been living like this for the past week and it just feel so natural. I keep forgetting I got into the void but whateva I’m the only who knows anyways. Anyways live yo best life and neva give upppp. I gotta go but I’ll probably eventually make a blog. My names angela so look out for it. I’m just mad lazy soo idk tho !!!

Angela out 🫡✌️

Girl this was so fun to read, I’m just as excited for you lmfao. I love seeing black women win, and thank you for sharing your methods! Enjoy your best life and come back if it resonates with your life bae !!!

[dropthedemiurge]

Love for Love's Sake | Things You Didn't Notice #9

(okay it's not an episode number this time i just still have many details to point out oops pls let me go)

I swear. I thought I'd stop mentioning small details because I already wrote like 10 posts on Tumblr translating and explaining all the cultural stuff regarding this show and the obsession is already becoming embarrassing, but I rewatched the last episodes again and I've got tiny. Little. Details. That I can't help but point people to once again. Because damn, the amount of thought put into this show!

(trigger warning: first part talks about suicide and depression, next ones are linguistic and cultural)

The Black Suit & The Sea

I would've asked Koreans I know about the significance of such symbolism but they are celebrating Seollal (New Year) today and I don't wanna ruin the festive mood asking about "how would people dress for suicide" x)

But after watching this scene, I recognized some strong parallels in Korean media depicting depression, suicide and one's decision to end their life. One of it is bridges and jumping (if you don't know what Bridge of Life is, ask me and I'll share, so this post wouldn't become too long) but another one is sea.

My interpretation - Koreans wear black suits to funerals, so if someone is headed to the sea in a black suit, it might mean this is the character's attempt to "have" their own funeral before finally ending their life. Why do I think this combination is somehow significant?

Because I remembered a music video one of K-pop artists I like (Kim Hanbin) made, after he experienced the downfall of career, extreme hate and rejection from the public, and severe depression. His whole album Waterfall tells Hanbin's personal story, dark thoughts and his battle to survive during the time when he was gone for 2 years, but in the music video for this album (illa illa) he is seen emerging from the sea in a black suit – metaphorically regaining his music and, most importantly, desire to live. Watch with lyrics!

If we think, this is how you depict suicidal thoughts/attempt in Korean media (of course, Love for Love's Sake was even more blunt in telling us the meaning), then Myungha wearing black suit wasn't just for the pretty or dramatic picture. More than that, we see him wearing the black suit for the whole last evening – especially when he goes to finally meet his mother.

Which tells us Myungha has already decided to disappear from this world, and was determined to do it on that day, and his mother rejecting him and pretending she doesn't know her son might not have been just the last straw... but it definitely could've been Myungha's last attempt to find anything in his life worth staying for, worth not going through with his plan.

Anyway, what a scary but beautiful symbolism.

Let's talk about something happier! More heartwarming!

Do you remember when we talked about the carefully placed movie posters in previous episodes? I payed more attention to the background this time when in Episode 8 Yeowoon ran to the cinema searching for Myungha in his world. And what an amazing discovery! When Myungha starts existing again and calls Yeowoon, the movie poster behind Yeowoon says "Guardian" (보호자).

And I already said in another post that Myungha in previous episodes admitted himself being Yeowoon's "guardian, protector" in the exact same word. But now this word is shown next to Yeowoon! As Yeowoon is the one who changed the main mission and has now declared himself Myungha's guardian and protector and will do his best to make him (his favourite pereson/bias/blorbo) happy. They have now both become guardians for each other. This. Goddamn. Show.

And I also want to shout out the VFX & Production team for this show – all the visual effects are very down to earth, gentle and not over the top but enhancing the series to the max. Like, maybe you wondered where on the screen does it say "Monday, August 14" and "Saturday, August 12"? Well, as expected, you see it on four monitor screens above the box office – the date, the ongoing movies (yep, still our favourite two fake movies) and available dates etc.

But when Yeowoon and Myungha agree to meet each other in the exact system time, they are facing each other without a barrier, and the screens are now counting down the time until the Game End. Instead of normally showing movies, like in the previous shot, it says "Time remaining: 3 hours, 23 minutes, 15 seconds". It was either done with VFX or practically, but still, the thought of incorporating system messages into the actual background is insane and I'm always happy to discover such details.

I don't know how many of you have motivational stairs at your schools, we definitely didn't have this but it's quite a popular thing in Korea. They put popular and uplifting sayings for students on each stair, sometimes they even quote motivational phrases from idols, like this:

And it's interesting that when system gets broken and Myungha is about to disappear, we see the deep cracks coming through the stairs, we see ruined school BUT at the same time the quotes in the show are so obviously in our focus. And they are already written (see screenshots above) in Korean and English, but I'll still write down: one is saying "Stay hungry, stay foolish" and "If you dream it, you can do it, you will succeed". So, perhaps... motivational quotes from sunbae?

And the last moment isn't heavy on translation but I still want to talk about it because cool Korean culture!xD You see the gang grilling meat on the roof (it's called samgyeopsal and it's very popular to have for gatherings), and then Myungha makes a "ssam" and feeds it to Yeowoon – but Sangwon steals it.

Ssam is a wrap, you grill meat then put it on the salad leaf, add other ingredients (like mushrooms, sauces, garlic, green onions etc, there are many side dishes) and then you wrap it in this sort of salad sack and eat it. It's very tasty and unusual combination. But the thing is! There is no way to make it for someone else and leave it on their plate so if you make a ssam wrap for someone and want to give it to a person, you literally have to feed them (like Myungha does with a very fond smile). This is why it's often seen as a romantic gesture (aka feeding someone from your fork etc) and why it's hilarious that Sangwon steals this ssam from Yeowoon (because he wants and he gets Myungha's affection and he's not above being a brat about it!)

I'm sure you can already sense it anyway without me telling you about romantic/close-friend implications, but I thought you guys might wonder why are the guys fighting over the salad leaf.

Another funny thing – Sangwon mentions "There's a saying, 'Don't scold dogs while they eat'". This is a Korean proverb "밥 먹을 때는 개도 안 때린다" ("You don't hit even a dog when it eats") which means that, no matter how annoying you find someone, no matter how angry you are, you can't scold this person while they are eating. Eating is a very important cultural thing in Asia, of course, so do not have arguments at the dinner :D But it's funny how Sangwon uses old proverbs to be mischievous and steal Myungha's love without consequences xD I adore him

I swear, this gotta be my last post about all the details in Love for Love's Sake. There is one more scene with the mirror and a caption, and I'm very curious if it means something because it was seen twice, during system breaking down scene as well, but it's either in Chinese or Japanese and I can't read it.

Anyway! Hope you enjoyed your everyday magazine, I love reading all your tags and thoughts and comments, and if you want to read all my previous translations and pointed out cultural details in Love for Love's Sake, go read this tag!=)

[foolondahill17]

Annual Favorite Supernatural Fic Rec List of 2023:

I bookmarked 66 fics in 2023 (and read…a lot more than that), but only 9 were written/updated in this year of our lord. SMH we gotta pump out more content, friends. Seriously though, I’ve got several more 2023 fic reads in my Marked for Later, but some are still WIPs or I just haven’t gotten around to picking them up yet. I’m sure some (like the much-hyped Lighthouse Keeper AU where there is darkness by the talented quiettewandering [@wanderingcas on tumblr]) will end up on my Bookmarked favs…but, alas, they’ll just have to wait for the 2024 recap.

The list below is in no particular order, barring the first, which has joined the ranks of one-of-my-favorite-fics-ever:

A Cliff That Knew Too Many Tides by luulapants (@luulapants)

E, early series Dean/others, 94,508 words

Partial Summary:

A canon rewrite AU diverging from the events of Some Cruel Tide, in which a shifter disguised as his father used Dean's blind obedience to molest him. By the start of S1, Dean's relationship with his father is more strained, his devotion more intense, and his life consumed by the need to hide the parts of himself he is most ashamed of.

My words:

If you’ve been looking for a gay!Dean manifesto, you’ve found it. Obviously, the subject matter is dark: warnings for past childhood sexual abuse, internal and external homophobia, past suicide attempt, and traumatic outing. It is also beautiful and heart-wrenching and scratches the swollen, itchy, weeping rash on my heart in a way that only the balm of good Dean angst can.  

Favorite part:

“I wasn’t acting out,” he blurted.

“What?”

“When I – I wasn’t trying to act out or anything.” Deacon’s presence hovered behind him like an aura, and Dean reminded himself, Don’t rock the boat. Don’t rock the boat.

Dad sighed. The line crackled, and Dean pictured him standing in a phone booth somewhere, probably huddled up against the cold. “Then what the hell would you call it?”

Dean tried out a few words in his head, imagining how they’d sound to Deacon. He ended up with, “I misunderstood. I thought I was supposed to.”

Asterism of an F-Series Ford Pick Up by disabled_dean (@disabled-dean)

M, Destiel, 17,408 words

Partial Summary:

When you've been to hell, desire is isolating and ugly.

Or: Cas drives his truck for a case and Dean is exceptionally horny about it

My words:

The way Dean’s PTSD is described in this fic, like a slow, oozing poison that awakens the longer he and Cas travel together, is tantalizing and masterful. Ostensibly, this fic is about Dean and Cas road-tripping to a case. It’s actually about how you, a monster-hunter, can come to terms (or not) with your body and soul when you think you’ve become the very thing you’re spent your whole life hunting.

 Favorite part:

"Like everything will be going fine and then all of a sudden I just. Can’t. I can't stand it. And the more fine everything is, the worse it gets and I feel-" he breaks off, eyes on his hands like they aren't his hands, thumb rubbing over and over the ring on his index finger, "It's like everyone else is living this normal fucking life and I'm still back in the pit."

Personal Space: The Final Frontier by botley

M, Destiel, Star Trek AU, WIP, 63,570 words

Partial summary

"Captain's Log, Stardate 10918.8. Captain Ellen Harvelle reporting, First Officer… Castiel… attending. After a month of bargaining with the Gehennian government, efforts to permit a search party within the Rack facilities still proved unsuccessful. Although Starfleet’s orders dictated we tuck tail and leave, I elected to disregard this decision and beam a rescue operations team down for the recovery of Lieutenant Commander Dean Winchester.”

My words:

This fic has been on my rec lists before. It’s still a WIP, but it very unexpectedly posted an update after a 3(?) year hiatus, so I’ll cling to hope until my fingernails leave a bloody, mauled mess.  This is basically a Star Trek AU where our favorite Supernatural gang are fucking around in Starfleet instead of the Midwest. Fantastic stuff – worth the read even if it does remain unfinished.

Favorite line:

"Dean made a face. Castiel decided the man was hideous."

Receding by minkmix

T, early season gen, 38,729 words

Summary:

After a visit to an old, abandoned theme park in the desert, Sam begins to notice strange lapses in Dean's memory. As his brother starts to disappear before his eyes, Sam must rush to find an answer before there isn't anything left to save... My words: A Lucky Charms fic if I’ve ever read one. Delicious, crunchy marshmallow goodness of some fantastic Dean!whump and panicked caretaker!Sam with the solid undercurrent of slightly sweetened amalgamized oat and corn cereal of a solid case fic. Yum.

 Favorite part:

“Sammy?” Dean cut him off.

“W-What is it?”

“What’s Dad’s name?”

Sam’s chest heaved as he fought himself from sounding as stunned as he felt.

“John.”

Swan Upon Leda by kelsstiel (@kelstiel)

E, Destiel real-world AU, 174,096 words

Summary:

Pediatric Surgery Fellow Dean Winchester meets baby Jack Kline and neuropsychologist Castiel Novak his first week on the job. Dean’s been accused a time or two of caring a little too much in the past and it’s hard not to care about the neurotic adoptive father and his medically needy preemie. After a series of run-ins between the pair, Dean and Cas develop a friendship that everyone else around them suspect more from immediately, though it takes them a little longer to get the memo. When Dean struggles with a particularly devastating patient loss, their mutual understanding of loss and love bring them closer in a way that neither of them could have expected.

My words: A solid, old-fashioned romantic AU. It’s unpretentious, fluffy, heart-warming, authentic and the kind of could-have-been-a-novel goodness that makes up the heart and breadth of fanfiction. Warning for infant illness and death (not Jack).

Favorite part:

"I know they say there’s a chance, but I’ve just got this feeling .” She shook her head and looked down for a moment. She looked up again and took a deep breath as if steadying herself. “I wish I could see you grow up.”

five minutes to six by saintedcastiel  (@saintedcastiel)

M, Destiel real-world AU, 23,383 words

Summary:

Castiel Novak has been the co-host of Good Morning, Lawrence! for a little over ten years when he stumbles across the story of a lifetime. But after a producer pulls the segment and tells him to forget it, Castiel begins to wonder who's really pulling the strings. Can he bring the truth to light while somehow managing to keep his co-host, and the man he loves, in the dark?

 My words: Another Goddamn quality AU. This one is a little quippier and fast paced than the Hospital AU above, but it’s full of fantastic characterization and even a last-minute breaking and entering romp. Fun that’s perfect for the whole family!

Favorite part:

“Been asking you out all week.” Dean tells him, and Castiel realizes all at once he’s right.

“Oh my god.” Castiel laughs. “You have.”

This Is Not My Beautiful Wife by luckshiptoshore (@luckshiptoshore)

T, Destiel, one-shot, 4,755 words

Summary:

“Dean,” says the man again. “This isn’t real. You need to come with me, now.”

Dean’s been zoning out again. But he can’t escape the feeling that something’s very, very wrong … and wherever he goes, a strange man in a trench coat follows.

My words: You gotta love the Djinn dream trope. This one has everything you want in a caught-in-a-fake-reality-while-your-lover-pleads-for-you-to-return-to-the-waking-world story, plus an extra dash of on-point characterization and some truly imaginative scenarios for Dean’s alternate realities.  

 Favorite part:

“We could look into adoption,” says Cas. “If you’d like. Of course we could also simply take a child, but I think that’s frowned on."

we really shouldn't be doing this by LoversAntiquities (@tragidean)

E, Destiel, 17,138 words

Summary:

After Castiel goes missing for a week, Dean finds him in an abandoned cemetery in the middle of nowhere Kansas, suffering from a mysterious welt. Only, as the hours go on, the deeper the curse grows—and Dean finds more than he bargained for, namely on every surface he and Castiel can find.

My words: This is more straight-up (not straight) porn than I usual rec, but this is a fantastic take on the from-sex-to-love fic where everyone was already in love to begin with. There’s a hefty sprinkle of idiots-to-lovers and sex-curse. Also angst, which is my bread and butter.

Favorite line:

Castiel stares up at him, his eyes gone soft, hooded. Dean thumbs over his eyelid, just to watch it flutter shut. “I’m not solely interested in you for your hands, or your mouth. They are wonderful attributes, but I don’t long for them so much as I long for you.” He leans into Dean’s palm and kisses the center. “I don’t know when I fell in love with you, but it would take the death of the universe to get me to stop.”

Postpartum Prometheus by babbyspanch, saltslimes (@dragqueenpentheus @nifedick)

E, Destiel, technically mpreg, WIP, 18,959 words

Summary

Welcome to the Supernatural renaissance. Welcome to Castiel and the terrible naissance.

My words: warning for the fact that this is technically an mpreg fic even though Castiel is an angel and not really a man. Warning, also, because this is another WIP that hasn’t been updated since the beginning of the year, so I don’t know if it’ll be finished. Basically, Dean and Cas bump uglies to unexpected results. Cas kinda freaks without telling Dean he’s his baby daddy. He also yanks out his intestines so said baby can be nice and comfortable in there. Funny and angsty.

Favorite part:

“Are those—?”

“Yeah.” He waves his hand at the door again, starting to feel like one of those used car lot inflatable men, limbs akimbo. “A total murderer looking guy just bolted that way. And not like— the regular murderer-looking people who come in.”

“And he left his organs.” Dennis thinks a moment, and then shrugs, as if this isn’t the weirdest thing he’s ever seen. He’s been working here longer than anyone Henry knows, maybe it isn’t. He opens his mouth and Henry can’t help hoping some miracle plan of action is going to fall out of it. “Can I ask you a personal question?”

“Um. What?”

“I don’t want to offend you.” He pauses, brows furrowed. He rolls Henry’s cup over in his hand. “What is a ‘FABINISTA’?”

Add your favorite written-in-2023 fics in the tags or a reblog!

[devskindawritingblog]

I remembered to send the ask to your writing blog this time!

Okay, here’s my idea for Shauna: she and reader aren’t dating yet, just best friends (sorry Jackie) and reader doesn’t know what to get her for Christmas. Then Shauna accidentally leaves her journal at their house, and they read it to try to get an idea for her gift. But instead they find all her entries about how she’s in love with reader. Shauna finds out and gets really mad, but she’s actually just embarrassed and scared that she ruined their friendship. But then reader kisses her and tells her they love her too. Turns out the perfect Christmas gift for Shauna was a girlfriend

Christmas Confessions

Shauna shipman x reader

AN: My last Yellowjackets Christmas fic! And of course my lovely tumblr wife requested it😘. I made the reader and Shauna besties and didn’t want to try and include Jackie somehow so I just don’t mention her. Shauna’s text is in green. And I put like the journal flashback things are in italics And the word count is I think the biggest at almost 1.8k. Also now that my Christmas things are done I’ll totally take requests. I’ll take requests about anyone that I have written for so far.

You and Shauna have been best friends since kindergarten. You have always been inseparable. Always having sleepovers together even joining the soccer team in grade 9. Everyone at school knows about you too and how much you care for one another.

One time in grade 2 a few of the boys were making fun of you and pushed you and that was the first time Shauna punched someone for you. That was when you first realized how much you would do for each other. Sure, Shauna got in trouble but it was grade 2 so she didn’t catch that much slack.

After that point no one messed with either of you. People were scared of Shauna and they were scared of what Shauna would do if they hurt you. And it was like that even in highschool.

————————————————————————

December 12, 1996

You and Shauna are both in your senior year now. She came over for her weekly sleepover. The two of you were hanging out like you normally do. Watching a movie, listening to music, and sometimes just laying there together.

That was the thing you loved about Shauna; the silences were never awkward. You could lay there and talk or just sit. Sometimes Shauna would write in her journal while you did homework.

 You start to think she loves that journal more than you. She always had it around. You learned early that she is very private about it. So you don’t ask to read it anymore. She’s your best friends but she can keep her thoughts and feelings private if she truly wants to.

Shauna had already left after having dinner with your family. Her mom had been in a rush to go somewhere. You go back into your room and that’s when you notice Shauna's journal sitting right on your bed. She must have forgotten it because she was rushing. 

You move it off your bed and place it on your nightstand. You will give it to her at school on Monday you think to yourself as you lay down on your bed. An hour passes every so often you glance over at the journal. 

You realize you still need ideas for what to get Shauna for Christmas. You look over at the journal and grab it. You get a good idea. You might as well take a little look to find possible gift ideas. It couldn't possibly hurt, right?

The cover has her name printed neatly with a pen. For a second you hesitate hoping nothing too personal is in her journal. It will only be for a few minutes you say to yourself. That reassures you and you flip open the first page.

————————————————————————

June 28 1996. You knew Shauna got a new journal at the end of grade 11, because you two found it at the mall together. You picked it up and showed it to her.

“Look Shaunie, it's green. Don’t you need a new one?” You said to her. Shauna ended up buying it. What you didn't notice back then was how Shauna looked at you that day or any day really.

The entry is pretty normal. It talks about your guys mall trip. And how you guys got ice cream. You smile to yourself as you remember how much fun you had with her. It talks about how you got ice cream all over your face and Shauna had to get a napkin and wipe it off.You finally notice how she talks about you. Sure you're close and give each other compliments but this feels different. You shrug it off and keep searching.

The next few entries are all in the summer. Mostly talking about the family vacation she went on .You flip to another entry.

————————————————————————

August 5 1996. You and Shauna were at her house. It explains what you guys did that day. Shauna had gotten a new lip gloss for her birthday and you both were trying it out. Shauna put it on first, rubbing her lips together. She writes about how you put it on as well. You remember how much you liked the lipgloss. The lovely pink shine looked great on your lips. And Shauna definitely thought so too. In fact she goes into great detail about how much she did like it.

You pause a confused look on your face. The sudden realization hits you hard. How did you not notice? You keep reading trying to confirm if you're not going crazy. You blush as you read the last sentence. 

“I wanted to kiss them so badly.” Shauna writes with a few pink hearts around your name. You suddenly feel really guilty but also relieved. You have known you like Shauna for a while. But you have been too scared to confess. How could you ruin your relationship with her like that?

You have so many conflicting feelings. You're happy she likes you back, but nervous as to how she would respond about you snooping around in her private journal.

At this point you can't stop reading them. Each one is a different day. Each entry delves into just how big of a crush Shauna truly has. 

————————————————————————

September 25 1996.

This one was around your first few weeks of grade 12. You and Shauna were in the same English Lit class. You went over to study with her. It was a fun night. but clearly Shauna saw it differently. She spent a good paragraph talking about your silly jokes and describing just how much she loves your laugh.

————————————————————————

October 31 1996

The two of you went to Lottie's annual halloween party. Of course dressed in matching costumes. You spent a long time finding a cute costume that would match with one another. The entry sounds pretty normal except for Shauna’s clear jealousy to you playing spin the bottle with the other girls. You ended up having to kiss Natalie. It was all for fun and games but clearly Shauna didn’t think so. You read it over and Shauna sounds angry.

“It should have been me kissing them.” She finishes off the entry with that angrily scribbled in pen.

The next few entries are about the same. You feel bad for reading all her personal thoughts and feelings. But you can’t seem to stop yourself from reading. You spend 2 hours reading all of the entries. You lay in your bed contemplating what you should do?

Give it back to her?

Confront her?

Keep her in the dark?

You run through all the ideas and scenarios in your head. Your anxiety builds and builds. You decide to sleep on it, you're exhausted from all the thoughts of what could happen.

You wake up on Sunday morning rubbing your eyes as you look over and see her journal staring back at you. You get up and get dressed, determined to tell her.

Your mom went out to do some Christmas shopping and you left her journal open on your bed.

You hear a shape knock on your door. You walk over to the front door and open it to a slightly flushed Shauna. She’s dressed in her iconic flannel .

“Uh,hi, sorry for showing up unannounced but I-uh left my  journal here last night.” She is clearly nervous that you might have read it .

“Oh! Right, come in , it’s uh in my room.” You say ushering her in, your face heating up as your heart pounds.

You bring her into your room forgetting that you left her journal open on your bed. She walks in after you as you quickly grab it, closing it and passing it to her.

“Did you read it?” She says half nervous half accusatory. You stumble over your words as all your thoughts slip from your mind.

“You did read it ! You know it’s private!” She yells pacing around your bedroom. You try to jump into it to try and defend yourself but she’s not having any of it.

Shauna never yells at you and this version of her scares you. 

“Shauna plea-“ You try to say but she cuts you off to mad to listen. “You know how I feel about you don’t you? You know how I feel about you ?” She says her voice quiets a bit. 

“I can’t believe you would do this!” She starts yelling again. She sounds almost disappointed and it makes you feel worse. But you have to tell her.

You start tuning her out as you work up the courage She goes on about how mad she is. But you're not listening anymore. You step closer to her. She stops noticing the look on your face.

“What?” She starts to say before you quickly cut her off. You lean forward cupping her face and pulling her into a passionate kiss.

Her breath hitches and she gasps in shock. You pull back a little, noses touching. “Is this ok?” You say a hushed whisper. Shauna nods and smiles wrapping her arms around your waist, pulling you into another kiss this time.

You both end up on your bed, Shauna's journal discarded on the floor. As you too enjoy your first kiss together. Shauna’s hands behind your neck as you both make out. 

Shauna lays down with you and you smile . “I love you too. You know ?” You say as Shauna blushes remembering that you read all the things she said about you.

“Did you actually read like everything?” Shauna says quietly as she plays with the hem of your pants. You blush too a little embarrassed. “Yeah uh I did , funny enough I was trying to find an idea for a Christmas present.” You say as Shauna’s embarrassment slowly disappears.

“That stuff I wrote was a little uh well you know.” Shauna says turning shy again. “It was really cute Shaunie.” You say with a little smirk. She groans and covers her face. “Especially when you said that you wanted to fight Natalie during halloween.” You say giggling a little at Shauna’s flustered face. 

“I also heard all about how you love when I wear this shirt.” You say sitting up a little to give her a full look. Her eyes widen a little and she somehow blushes more red. 

“That's mean.” She whines but you both know now that she is loving this. She eyes you up and down and pulls you in for another kiss. “I bought you that shirt for your birthday.” 

“I know silly you went on and on about it.” You tease as you pull her down with you and pull her into another long kiss.

“You know what? It turns out I got you what you wanted for Christmas.”

“Really what was it?”

“Me.” 

[autisticlancemcclain]

thank u @zenstrike for the tag <333333333 i see ur mic and i'm elated about it

1. how many works do you have on ao3?

185! but i haven't updated in like a week and a half so we're probably closer to 190

2. what’s your total ao3 word count?

556,104. i am very excited to watch it jump up when i finally finish my longfic teehee

3. what fandoms do you write for?

literally just voltron lol. well not counting baby me's wattpad lol. i started writing almost two years ago and just went ham basically. i've been intentionally avoiding things that i know i will get hyperfixated on bc i don't want to stop my writing obsession lol

4. what are your top five fics by kudos?

ooooou i'm excited to check. i know it's changed quite a bit over time. i usually sort them by hits!

i will grind you to sand (beneath my louboutin heels) [voltron, 2573 words]: bamf lance fic where i give him a revolver and let him go ham basically

mr. snuggles [voltron, 1656 words]: one of my very earliest fics! lance, lover of weirdo animals, finds a demonic cat-sized spider and adopts it despite his friend's freakouts

he might not look like he gets bitches (but honey that dick was eleven inches) [voltron, 1136 words]: this one is so dorky lol but it's just secret relationship klance coming to light in the most embarrassing possible way

does anyone know where the love of god goes (when the waves turn the minutes to hours) [voltron, 4283]: a canon divergence au where lance is a seer and convinces the skeptics on his team of his abilities by ending the war

this is the part of me that you're never gonna ever get away) [voltron, 3262 words]: a lance & shiro hurt/comfort with a small autistic lance character study! i'm very proud of this one

5. do you respond to comments?

i definitely do on tumblr! it's one of the first things i do when i wake up actually. on ao3, though...i'm pretty sure i have about eight hundred unanswered comments sitting in my inbox 💀 it's an ongoing issue

6. what’s the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

i'm almost sure it's this post-game show lance leaving fic, because i got comments and asks for weeks begging me to write a happy ending lol. but this fic from the hana universe, from when keith is little and shiro is fighting for custody and they haven't figured things out yet. that one is sad. this dream pov adashi fic is also sad and has no happy ending bc, you know. shiro is in space and adam thinks he's dead and everything. my loneliest series is also still in progress and as such there is no happy ending. and this is my earliest angsty-ending fic with MCD

7. what’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

oh god pretty much everything i write has a happy ending?? if i’m being serious?? frankly i don’t do a lot of linear plot. i just write Scenes that are vaguely connected. BUT my h2o fic had a plot that ended happily, as did my cowboy fic, but truly i’m more of a slice of life kinda gal. all my active wips are plot-driven, though, and i plan for all of them to end happily.

8. do you get hate on fics?

oh god yeah. i get it on brown eyed lance, autistic lance, adhd keith, allura just in general (are you sensing a pattern), my refusal to use readmores, and lately just some demands for me to write differently/more?? most of it is just funny so i post it to goof on it lol, but some of it i just delete and pout about until i forget about it 💀

9. do you write smut? if so, what kind?

yes and it’s nasty and i will literally never ever post it. although i guess i’ve written some softer stuff that’s more allusion than anything, like in my loneliest series.

10. do you write crossovers? what’s the craziest one you’ve written?

not anymore, but i did when i was a kid?? i think i wrote a pjo/hoo/divergent/the mortal instruments/homestuck/a bunch of other shit fic when i was 13. i’ve successfully blocked that era out of my mind tho so i’m not sure. i do a lot of insane aus, tho. i wrote a fic based off a country song written in the sixties. so.

11. have you ever had a fic stolen?

i’ve had people write continuations of my wips?? which i didn’t rly like. i just ignored it.

12. have you ever had a fic translated?

someone has asked me about translating a fic before! haven’t heard anything since tho.

13. have you ever co-written a fic before?

i have tried. i’m not very good at it. i have very Specific ideas about things and can be very controlling, so it’s honestly better that i don’t lol.

14. what’s your all-time favorite ship?

klance, easy. been in the trenches of this goddamn fandom since i was 13 years of age. it’s been a Journey.

15. what’s a WIP you want to finish, but doubt you ever will?

god, the butterfly effect. i get people asking me to update all the time and i genuinely feel bad, because i have absolutely no ideas or plans for it. i might try to come up with an ending of some kind?? but i wrote that like two years ago, so i have changed a LOT about my writing since then.

16. what are your writing strengths?

dialogue and humour, i think. and sometimes writing lack of emotional communication (if that makes sense — i like to try and write around an emotion).

17. what are your writing weaknesses?

i over explain a lot. and i overuse dialog ur tags sometimes. i have a Very Specific scene playing out in my head and i want everyone else to see it like i’m seeing it, which is my downfall a lot. i’ve been trying to work on implicit stage directions.

18. thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic?

i think sometimes it’s necessary? it can be a good tool for humour, like with cussing that can’t be achieved in english. but while i understand and read several languages i have always always struggled to speak or write in them. it’s very frustrating so i often avoid the subject entirely lol.

19. first fandom you wrote for?

i’ve been writing fanfic in my head since before i knew what it was, but i started typing things at around 11 when i used to homestuck roleplay with my friends lol. messy messy times.

20. favorite fic you’ve ever written?

oh i am my own target audience. i have several.

i need a man (who’s patient and kind): keith-centric post canon (divergence) fic where lance takes him to his family and keith is good with kids and just keith being loved is the whole point. always.

what if i lose it all: an alternate universe where lance, as a baby, loses both his parents, and then is raised by his oldest siblings. in luis’ pov.

when does a ripple become a tidal wave (when does the reason become the flame): brogane fight & angst canon divergence post season 6; covering shiro’s guilt complex and keith’s unwavering loyalty

he’s into superstitions (black cats and voodoo dolls): halloween verse with witch lance and vampire keith! i have barely spoken about this au on here but rest assured i’m thinking about it all the fucking time

the applebee’s universe: modern au with young keith and lance learning how to love each other

ceilings (plaster): non-linear dream-like fic that’s just so trippy and strange i’m obsessed with it

if the sky comes falling down (for you) there’s nothing in this world i wouldn’t do: a keith character study about how the biggest bleeding heart in the universe loves

the hana universe: brogane-centric universe as their family starts rocky and grows

thank u again for the tag zen <33 open offer for anyone else who would like to hop on!!

[jaylienpotter]

*~Masterlist~*

¦ Jaylienpotter on Ao3 ¦

¦ Intro on alt: @boyswillbebugs ¦

¦ Bellatrix RP: @bestblacksister ¦

Ao3 multichapter: Shedded Snake

(TW: r*pe/non-con; read tags and notes!)

Regulus Black's life changed when he was raped by his best friend and roommate Barty Crouch Jr. Not wanting to ruin the environment of their shared friend group, he kept the traumatic event to himself. The only one who knew about it was, surprisingly, his brother's best friend, James Potter, after a confrontation in the hallway. Follow Reg as he tries to overcome and heal from the trauma, while falling for the one helping him in this journey.

Ao3 multichapter: For you, anything

James Potter's life turns upside down when Lily - his wife and mother of their two year old son - asked for a divorce. Will he lose himself in the midst of a failed marriage and joined custody? Sirius Black has been in love with his best friend for over a decade. After offering for James and his son Harry - Sirius's godson - to move in, will he manage to keep his feelings a secret?

Prompt tumblr blogs

A list of tagged tumblr blogs that give you prompts! Both Marauders-based (general or specific ships) and unspecified/general prompts. Hope it's helpful!

Prongsfoot Bingo

A challenge to complete a set of 16 prompts about James x Sirius

The bingo card

Raising Harry snippet

Mutual Coming Out (Ao3)

Wolfstar Bingo

A challenge to complete a set of 16 prompts about Remus x Sirius

The bingo card

Let them be

A small collection of 9 chapters/parts, each one about a character and their relationship with gender, sexuality, feminism, or love.

Let boys wear trousers

Let boys wear skirts

Let people want both

Let people want none

Standalones

Prompts or something random that I remembered turned into microfics (sometimes not so micro), not connected to each other. Not including those short chats.

Jegulus proposal

James gets trans Reg a dick (light NSFW, fluff)

Lily and Sirius sibling problems solidarity

Jegulus "don't go" prompt

Rosekiller brews amortentia

Sirius finds out about Jegulus

Jegulus raise Harry

Coffee shop AU Jegulus

Drunk Regulus confesses

Trans Regulus runs away

Jegulus breakup

Trans Regulus and intimacy (fluff, implied sex)

Regulus is taken in by the Potters

Prongsfoot (romantic) meet through pottery

James can't stop thinking about stranger Sirius Black (prongsfoot)

Muggle AU James crushing on artist Sirius

Prongsfoot (romantic) bonding over text

James meets Sirius's friends at his birthday (prongsfoot)

Sirius approves of Jegulus

James gives Lily a sweet bday gift (Jily)

Regulus defends James to Lily

Harry Oblivious Potter (Golden Trio Era)

Snippets of WIP Rock 'N' Roll Suicide

The fic (not published yet) is Wolfstar, mostly canon-compliant, focuses on Sirius as a person and his character growth.

Very heavy but most of the posts on tumblr will be of more casual parts of the fic.

Quidditch teams debate

James finds out Sirius bottoms (light NSFW)

Wolfstar coming out to James

Eclipse WIP

James is a single dad and Harry has advanced cancer. He wishes to meet his favourite author before he dies (R.A.B). Regulus agrees to it and falls in love with James.

E-mail to the author

Headcanons

My personal headcanons/theories about the characters :)

My personal ships

Blind Regulus

Peter Pettigrew headcanons

Different ships in cottages

Marauders Era dancing AU/headcanons ft. reggiecantswimm (a thread)

Marauders Era health headcanons

Lesbian Wolfstar

Alcoholic Remus Lupin (TW: addiction)

Prongstail (James x Peter) hcs

Regulus and Lily friendship

Marauders and the Holidays

Ideas I won't write

Feel free to use them as long as you credit me and tag me (I wanna read!)

Remus goes back in time

Two dimensions cross

Formation of Jegulily [might write]

Toxic mix of Wolfstar, Starchaser and one-sided Prongsfoot

Smut (NSFW)

Small scenes/one-shots with explicit sex (check the TW/CW)

Wolfstar chastity cage (Ao3)

Jegulus kitchen sex (Ao3)

Wolfstar x James threesome (Ao3)

Dead Dove

Fics/scenes/one-shots with themes considered dark, problematic and/or taboo. Mind the tags. DL;DR

Knife play Rosekiller (Ao3) (smut)

Regulus tells James he was SA (Ao3) (read the TWs)

One-sided Regulus/Sirius (Ao3) (TW: MCD)

Sirius finds Jegulus sex tapes (Ao3) (smut)

Veritaserum Jegulus x Sirius (Ao3) (smut)

[penname-artist]

Howdy! I'm not really in the Cars fandom anymore but this stupid person has been spamming me with these stupid messages and I just wanted to let you know all of her blogs that I've seen so far.

1. Joyfulprincessfun

2. Alwayscrispyprincess

3. Perfectlygeneralconnoisseur

4. Supertidalwavebouquet

5. Babylightcowboy

6. Scrumptiousladykitty

7. Clearblazestrawberry

8. Steadyphilosopherpeach

9. Almostbriefdragon

10. Greatparadisebear

11. Tenaciouschilddefendor

Those are all Chloe's alts that I've seen, I'm just curious if she's going after Team Fortress 2 blogs now or if she's doing this because I was in the Cars fandom... Over 3 years ago. (That's right, she's held a grudge against me because 3 years ago I didn't want to do a RP with her.)

Thank you so much for the info and update, I really appreciate it.

Yeah, I've been seeing Chloe popping up across multiple fandoms and social medias, since about August of this year. Several individuals in the fandom have also reported these appearances, from Ao3, to Tumblr, to Reddit and Wattpad.

The unfortunate thing is that because of the nature of this person and their insistence on attacking any and all people that even remotely connect to the World of Cars fandom, and their constant changing of accounts, the only thing we can all really do if they show up at our doorstep is to continuously block, report, and cease any and all direct interactions.

Just a reminder too to any folks that are/were at any point in the fandom, if you are getting messages, asks, comments, or other materials saying things like these, you're not alone and it's definitely not personal. This troll of a user has been attempting to target and harass various people for I shit you not literal *years*. Many people have been attempting to curb this issue, but unfortunately as of right now, the only things we can do is to keep doing what we've been doing: block on sight, and do not interact.

Y'all stay safe out there still, and don't let the Chloe bastard here win. You go post all the WoC content you want to, and you hold your heads up high. There's community here that won't tell you to off yourself for something that you didn't do. In times like this, I absolutely urge you to reach out to other content creators and make connections with people. Good things can come out of bad situations, and a lot of the trolling that Chloe has done so far unintentionally brought a lot of WoC people closer together as a result.

Best of luck to all of you, and thank you again for this information my friend!

[silverstarfics]

Since tumblr ate your asks (most scary thing, very evil)

REVERSE TRICK OR TREAT!!!

*stuffs treats, tricks and candy into your mail box *

Extra bonus part of my fic that even grew extra long, because I just had to write this scene!!

----

(9- bonus!) Virgil took his brand-shiny-new firefighters uniform from Chief McCready’s hands, grinning face splitting wide. His own uniform, because for the next few weeks he was a proper part of Blue Watch, and a firefighter! 

It had even been modified to incorporate his IR tech and most importantly his green baldric over the top because couldn't imagine feeling properly prepared for rescues without it. 

He tugged the new jacket on right away over his flannel, feeling like a kid on halloween. He gave it a spin, the coat flaring out around him. Heh, if little Virgie could see him now, a proper firefighter.

“Whatcha laughing at, Tracy?” Cass clapped him on the shoulder. 

As soon as Virgil explained what had been his halloween costume for every year of his childhood, he was surrounded by Blue Watch, good naturedly demanding that they had ‘got to see photographic evidence.’

Virgil rolled his eyes, but called up John, the keeper of all the family photos on Five’s massive storage banks.

John obliged, and firefighters crowded around the holos projected from his wrist comm.

“Aww, you were an adorable kid, Tracy!” 

“Cuuute!” 

“You sure did grow up, but I don’t think the expression has changed at all!”

Then a snickering John decided to chime in with the whole practicing fighting fires with the garden house incident, and the consequences to hanging laundry and open windows.

Cass, serious, no nonsense Chief McCready was giggling, tears streaming down her face, hanging onto his shoulder to stay upright. 

Virgil snorted, then couldn’t help but burst out laughing too.

He was proud of his achievements to become a firefighter, they were all laughing with him, not at him, they were his team. He threw his arms around them, grinning along. 

AHHH THANK YOU <333

Love love loveee this!!

[random-mailbox]

Random-Mailbox's Favorite Sailor Moon Fics - Week 22 - Friends to Lovers

I think this may have been the post I have been looking forward to the most, so thank you tophat for picking it as this week’s theme (see end of last week's post for the story behind it). Friends to Lovers is more manga than anime characterization in most cases, which is a nice change to the constant arguing we get with the OG anime compliant stories.

As always, my apologies in advance for spoiling some of these for you (Fic Titles are linked to either FFN or AO3 entries).

It's You (I Fell Into) - @idesofnovember

Usagi literally trips over air and falls onto Mamoru on his first day of being the new engineer at the company she works for. As they start to spend more time together both in and out of the office, they get into a pattern that will require clearing up of misunderstandings before someone gets hurt. Also this art piece titled "Before you go in" by @iamcharlotte88 totally fits into the end of chapter 3 / start of chapter 4 of this story.

It's Always Been You - Beej88

In this non-senshi AU, little Usagi finds Mamoru in his hospital room and declares that since he is her best friend he will never be alone again. As he moves through foster care, Tsukinos always keep an eye on him, with him becoming an integral part of the family. Except that to him, Usagi means so much more than that, and she herself doesn’t realise yet what Mamoru means to her.

The Ghosts Of Lake Yokai - @floraone

This is the lemoniest story of the bunch. It is an aged up retelling of the original anime episode, BUT if the Starlight Tower stand-off turned out completely differently, with Mamoru joining the senshi team as the result. This one also features magical healing 🍆, which is always welcome in my books 😏

Not Him, Please? - @uglygreenjacket

Mamoru has long ago realized that he was in love with Usagi but chosen to keep himself in check best he can to stay in her life as one of her best friends. But when mixing alcohol, jealousy and a birthday party, even best intentions can go astray.

Finally Mine - @reispinkoveralls

Having woken up after defeating Chaos at the Cauldron, Usagi rushes to Mamoru's place to make sure he is back as well. In this AU, they have been fighting together as a team, and Usagi chose to not worry him overseas when a new enemy appeared. This one is also a 🍋🍋

Miraculous Musings: Vignettes of a Miracle Romance - Chapter 25: Fairy - @goddessalthena

This one-shot gives us a glimpse of an AU that us readers will hopefully get to see in full one day. The set-up is that our favorite duo has known each other since childhood and Mamoru gets something incredibly thoughtful as a gift for Usagi.

---

Next week's post will cover Valentine's Day themed fics and is our next Holiday post of the series.

Here are the links to the previous Tumblr posts in these series to explore more amazing works based on different themes - make sure to check them out if you haven't had a chance! (Click on title name to go to the post) - I will keep updating the list every week as new posts come up:

Week 1 - Groundhog Day

Week 2 - Established Relationships

Week 3 - Sex Positivity

Week 4 - Unfinished Stories

Week 5 - Darker Stories

Week 6 - Potions 🧪

Week 7 - Reveals

Week 8 - 👻Halloween🎃

Week 9 - Wrong Perceptions

Week 10 - Non-Senshi AU

Week 11 - In-Progress Fics

Week 12 - Mutual Pining

Week 13 - Enemies to Lovers

Week 14 - Slow Burn

Week 15 - Christmas Part 1 - Ugly Christmas Sweaters and Santa!

Week 16 - Christmas Part 2

Week 17 - New Years

Week 18 - High School AU

Week 19 - Slice of Life

Week 20 - Coffee shop AU

Week 21 - Huddle for Warmth

[alessandrxs]

HSHQTASK059

when did you join ? what made you join ? what do you remember from the plotlines that were current at the time ? where were you in life when you joined and where are you now ?

i joined back in 2018 , which is crazy to even think about because it's now six years later ! i remember having seen the group a few times in the tags but didn't apply until a few months later ... but when i DID pluck up the courage to join , it was just before the olimpiel wedding which was so fun to be a part of ! i think i was literally just starting a new job too around the time i joined , so it was changes all around , which was really refreshing !!

2. which characters have you written over the years ?

too many ... starting with prycilla , aurora , danilo , amon , kris , ale , renee , aalayna , omari , pretty sure i had a kelsey merrit at one point , eloa , the madelyn cline and drew starkey i had for seconds , i think there was a sofia carson in there somewhere too ...

3. what is your favourite plotline that you've been part of ?

being a part of the italy plotline was so fun ! i'm not good at politics by any means but being around people who had so many good ideas which would always boggle my brain bc i'm dumb as shit was so fun to be a part of ! but also , the egypt plotline will always have a place in my heart ...

4. what about other people's plotlines ?

so so SO many !! the english plotline , the french ..... i was always on the edge of my seat whenever they were written out on the dash waiting for the next person to reply so the tea could be dished out ! but honestly every single plotline was just so interesting and amazing to read that i was always in awe

5. who is your favourite character from the ones you've played ? why ? what made you love them ? what made them so fun to write ?

considering how many times i've brought him back after thinking his time was done , without a doubt my favourite would have to be ale ... i just feel like he became such a comfort character for me , especially since when i've been going through things he's always been the character i've reached out for to write ! but kris was also so much fun to write and then my fool of omari , he really was my comedic relief character !

6. if you could relive a plotline, which would it be ?

kris realising just how much of a prick his dad is and becoming firmly team silje <3 it was a defining moment for him , and now silje has a job and is in college !! she's doing so good !!!

7. is there a plotline that you'd edit now if you could ?

literally not a single one ! i loved all the twists and turns , seeing how things unfolded , it was fun to just be able to write them out and see where they led and go from there

8. what's a plotline you wish you would have been able to finish before closing or just write more of ?

definitely the egypt plotline ... it happened at a time where i really didn't have time to be fully involved in and i think it's just been so unresolved , if only life didn't happen 😔

9. what is your favourite ooc memory ?

the panic in the ooc chat when evy fucked up the counting bot when we were at like 300+ ..... AKJDNFKJDF there are so many moments that i'll cherish forever but this one is the first that came to mind !

10. where can others find you if they want to get in touch ?

i have a tumblr for indie / 1x1 purposes which is @gcdlybehaviour ( currently under co ) and a discord that's with the same name ! honestly feel free to contact me at either of them at any time !

11. what else would you like to say ?

thank u all so , so much for all the memories and making hshq such a special place <3 i joined at a time where joining groups had become such an anxiety inducing experience for me but everyone was so , so welcoming and it soon became a place of comfort and to just get away from everything ! i've genuinely loved writing out every single thread , plotting out every single plot and just being able to be in an environment where everyone has been like a family ! i'm going to miss everyone so much <3

[ladylooch]

Letters in Your Last Name- Chapter 1

Visit the Series page here.

A/N: She's here! On Tumblr! The AU that brought me back to fan fic 🥰 I am going to post one chapter a day until it's all over here. I originally posted this on mibba, but Tumblr has been kind to me and I want to share these two with you! Note, I did change Alex's kids names because it felt like the right thing to do. K, enjoy!

Word Count: 4.1k

Warnings: swearing.

“Alex Stalock!” I screech at my older brother as he tries to grab the mini stick out of my hands. “Your son needs to learn how to lose.” I insist, reaching out my hand for him to give it back to me.

“Sam, he’s 5. Let the kid get at least one shot in.” Alex laughs, giving me a light shove.

Alex and I are playing mini sticks with his oldest child, Sawyer, in the living room of my brother’s sprawling home in the outer suburbs of St. Paul, Minnesota. I’m determined to score on him just like I was when we were kids playing in our parents unfinished basement, 10 minutes from where we are now. Alex is my youngest, older brother and currently plays for the Minnesota Wild as a goalie.

“What time is Kevin going to be here?” Felicia, Alex’s wife of almost ten years, asks after taking a sip of her red wine. They were high school sweethearts and she’s been a part of our family for as long as I can remember.

“6:30.” Alex answers as he sets himself up in the net again.

“Who is Kevin?” I wonder as I reach for the ball on Sawyer’s stick in a lame attempt to take it from him.

“New guy. Just got traded here from Nashville.” Alex says as he exaggerates a dive. Sawyer shoots and the white ball sails into the netting. He lifts his stick and cheers, pumping his fists in the air and yelling.

“Daddy, I’m Eric!” He exclaims, mimicking Eric Staal who is known for his excited, goal scoring celebrations on the team.

“You’re definitely quieter than that guy.” Alex snorts. “Kevin is your age.” Alex finishes to me, grabbing a sip of water from his glass on the coffee table.

I’m the youngest of my two siblings, but I’m actually considerably younger than both my brothers. Nick, the oldest, is 12 years older than me while Alex is 9 years older. It goes without saying, but yes, I was a complete surprise to my parents, who thought they were done after having two boys. My older brothers were smitten with me from day one, but Alex and I have always been the closest. He taught me how to skate, tie my shoes and throw a punch. Mom wasn’t too thrilled about the last one. The teenage years were a struggle, especially considering Alex liked to scare all the hockey boys away from me in high school. Overall though, we have been thick as thieves and rarely notice the age difference.

“Honey, can you help me put the salad together? Serena needs me to help her go potty.” Felicia reaches for their daughter and scoops her up into her arms. Serena is the youngest of the two kids, turning three in a few short months.

“Yep!” Alex agrees, swiftly leaving our game.

“Alright, little man. You’re toast now that dad’s gone.” I grin mischievously at Sawyer.

“Doubt it.” Sawyer replies. I laugh loudly and glance at Alex who gives me a wicked grin.

“That’s my boy. Get her.”

Sawyer and I duke it out while dinner is being prepared. He allows a couple soft goals and I let in a few just to keep the fun going. He’s winning by two goals when the doorbell chimes throughout the house.

“Got it!” Alex yells from the kitchen, jogging out to the front door. “Hey man!” I hear Alex greet our guest. “Come on in.”

I stare Sawyer down in the net, looking at the gaping hole he left to the right and instead, shooting directly into his stomach. I let out a groan as Sawyer giggles excitedly.

“Nice save bud! Time to be done though. Please go wash up for dinner.” Alex says as he walks back into the living room with Kevin Fiala in toe.

“No! I’m about to beat Auntie.” Sawyer insists.

“Lies,” I shake my head at him, giving him a joking snarl. “Nobody beats me in mini sticks.”

“Well, if you rage slash everyone when you lose, it’s in everyone’s best interest if you win.” Alex grins wildly at me. “Sawyer, that wasn’t me asking. Go.”

“That was one time.” I pout at him. I glance to his left and take in the newest member of the Minnesota Wild. What I see is as good of eye candy as you can get. Strong jaw, deep brown eyes, a smile that invites you in for one drink and the next thing you know you’re screaming his name in pleasure. Yikes. I shake my head, putting on a pleasant smile and forcing my eyes back to my brother.

“Kevin, this is my little sister, Sam. Sam, Kevin.”

“Nice to meet you.” I wave at him, grabbing the sticks and goals to move them out of the way. Kevin walks towards me, grabbing the goals out of my hand.

“I can help.” He offers.

“Oh, thanks.” I say to him, smiling. “They go in the playroom down the hall.” I tell him. We enter the playroom and I step over stuffed animals, cars, and legos to get to the back corner where the knee hockey stuff lives. As he places the goals down, I take an opportunity to look at him. Damn, this guy is gorgeous. Not even in the trying too hard kind of gorgeous; It’s all clearly natural. A combination of his bone structure, 5 o’clock shadow and brown hair flipping out slightly from his hat makes me weak in the knees. He’s wearing dark jeans and a white Adidas sweatshirt that showcases his broad shoulders. He glances at me and when our eyes meet, I can feel my body tingle in response. Our gazes hold for a breath, but it’s enough for my heart to beat faster in response.

“Alex says you live here?” He asks me when our hands are empty.

“Um, yeah. Alex is gone a lot during the season, so I help out with the kids when he is out of town. At first, it was just for long road trips, but it works to always have adults outnumbering the kids.”

“That makes sense.” He nods in response, hands going into his pockets. “So you’re the mini sticks champion in this house?” He tilts his head as he looks at me through shining, bright eyes. I laugh and give my eyes a quick roll.

“Alex likes to talk shit, but yes, I was always the champion growing up between my siblings. Being the only girl has it’s perks sometimes.” I shrug. “As for this house, I’ve been known to let Sawyer win a time or two.”

He leans his head back and genuinely laughs. I bite my lip, taking in the sight of his relaxed posture, his easy smile, and his tongue as it licks over his bottom lip. My stomach dips in response. I swallow hard, looking away from him.

Sam, you’re going into dangerous territory.

“Um, I think Felicia said dinner was almost ready.” I say, considering he is between me and the door. I know we need to move along, otherwise Alex or one of the kids will get curious.

“Sure. Well, maybe some other time you and I can play together. I’d love to challenge you for your title.”

“Oh really? Even after the rage slashing story?”

“What can I say.” He says with a shrug. He turns towards door, but pauses and looks back at me. “I like a girl with some fire in her.” He distinctly looks me up and down, pausing briefly at my lips, then grins like wild and walks out.

Uh oh.

- - -

Dinner is filled with carbs, wine, and plenty of light, Midwestern conversation. Kevin tells us that he is originally from Switzerland, but stays in Sweden during the off season. He played there before he was drafted into the NHL and fell in love with the country. He visits for multiple weeks in Switzerland before and after the season where his family still lives. He was drafted by Nashville in 2014 and had a rough journey through his NHL career so far.

“I appreciate the support I’ve gotten from the Predators over the years, but I can’t say that I’m sad to not be there anymore.” Kevin tells us after taking a drink of water. “Towards the end it became clear that I was never going to find my place in the organization.”

“I get that.” Alex tells him, “I’ve been with three different teams in my career and each one offers a different atmosphere. Some you can thrive in and others seem to hold you back.”

“Yeah, and being a European far from home adds another level of frustration when things aren’t going great.”

“I bet. I feel grateful I can play in the place where I am from and have my family at every game.” Alex nods. As he finishes, Serena lets out a large yawn. “Well, kids, it’s about that time.”

“But I’m not tired.” Sawyer tells his dad. He’s been fascinated with Kevin’s stories of his time in the NHL and abroad.

“I’ve seen a few yawns out of you too.” Felicia insisted, “Plus it’s bath night so we need to get moving.”

“If I’m holding you all up, I can head home.” Kevin says, moving to rise from his chair.

“No! Stay as long as you want.” Felicia insists, putting her hands up to stop him. “Al, why don’t you help me with the kiddos and Sam can stay with Kevin.”

“I can clean up.” I tell her. The kids are gathered up by their parents, leaving Kevin and I alone with a table full of leftovers and dishes. “You can just relax. I’ve got this.” I insist as he starts clearing plates.

“The least I can do is help clean up. The food was amazing.”

“Yeah, Felicia is an awesome cook. You’ll have to come back when she makes biscuits and gravy. Although, you should plan a nap into your day right after.” I laugh, grabbing a few glasses and walking over to the sink.

“That sounds like an off-day kind of meal.” He jokes as he hands me the plates. Our fingers brush and electricity slips up my arm and down my spine. Our eyes meet over the plates and I find myself unable to look away.

“Yeah, but it’s well worth the discomfort.” I say to him, trying to not sound as breathless as I feel.

“Some things in life are like that.” He gives me a small smirk before heading back to the table to grab more dishes. I force out a slow breath as I rinse the dishes before putting them into the empty dish washer. I don’t know what it is about him, but there is this undeniable force between us that feels like it’s pulling me to him. We work steadily in comfortable silence, him grabbing dishes and me putting them into the dishwasher. I take great care with each interaction to focus on the dishes in his hand and not let our fingers touch.

“So tell me about you.” He says as I’m putting the last few dishes away. I glance up at him, shrugging.

“What do you want to know?”

“Anything you’ll give me.” He leans back against the counter, arms crossed, waiting. My skin tingles beneath his gaze and I feel my cheeks grow pink at the awareness of his eyes on me.

“Born and raised here in Minnesota. I’ve never been to Sweden or Switzerland, or even Nashville. My favorite things are hockey, my family, and pasta. Coffee is my drink of choice and ice cream is my weakness.”

“Yeah, I’m a sucker for sweet things like ice cream and pretty women.” He mentions casually. There is a suggestion in his voice and the look on his face. I smile in response, sliding my gaze back to the dishes.

“FiFi, “I say using his nickname from Nashville that he told us about earlier in the evening. “Are you flirting with me in my brother’s kitchen?” I shut the dishwasher door, very aware that was the only barrier between us.

“Well, you having to ask is a bit embarrassing.” He bites his bottom lip and folds his arms tighter across his chest. “But I hope it’s still working.” I hold his gaze and breathe out a laugh.

“Maybe. But I’m not sure this is a good idea.” I say, pressing the start button. The machine clicks to life and I turn to grab containers for the leftovers.

“Ah. I get it. Your boyfriend isn’t interested in sharing?” He moves closer to where I am standing, grabbing a container and filling it with the leftover bread. He snaps the lid shut. As his arms move in this motion, I can feel the heat from his body through my sweatshirt.

“Smooth.” I acknowledge, scooping the pasta into two separate containers. “But, no, I don’t have a boyfriend. Is your girlfriend still in Nashville?” I wonder.

“I’m not the kind of guy who flirts with women when he has a girlfriend.” He says seriously. “So, what’s holding you back? I haven’t been charming enough?” He bats his long lashes jokingly.

“My brother would not be okay with any semblance of us.” I shrug. “Al and I are really close and he pays my bills, so I’m not super interested in messing that up.”

“I get it. I’m close with my sister too.” He tells me. “It’s too bad though. I’ve never met someone I’ve wanted to know every part of before.”

I let that sit in the silence as I walk to the fridge and place the leftovers in there. When I turn, I meet his gaze. There is this look in his eyes that is difficult to place. Wonder? Desire? Need? In normal circumstances, attention like this would be something I would laugh off. Those lines he’s using? Cheesy with a side of fluff. And yet, it’s working. There is something about him that makes me want to know him too. There is this chemistry between us and even though this is my life, it’s hard to believe that we just met for the first time mere hours ago. He feels familiar and comfortable. Someone I could fall right into and never bother getting up from.

Kevin pushes himself from the counter and walks across the kitchen to me with a container of leftover salad. He pauses in front of me, looking down into my face and I feel like I can barely breathe. His brown eyes search my face and whatever he is looking for, he finds because his lips pull apart into an easy smile again.

“Kids are down.” Alex’s voice carries to us. I can’t stop my body from jumping in response. I slide two steps back from Kevin and attempt to keep my face neutral. Judging by my brother’s squinty eyes, I look just as guilty as I feel. “Kev, want to play some chel before you go?”

“Yeah, hope you don’t mind getting your ass kicked though.” Kevin says as he brushes passed me, our arms touching briefly. I blow out the breath I was holding as they disappear to the basement where Alex’s gaming consoles are. I glance to the living room where Felicia is tiding up from the day now that the kids are asleep.

“Be careful with that.” She tells me as she folds the blanket and drapes it on the back of the couch. She gives me a knowing smile and I find myself fidgeting under her gaze. “He does look like fun though.” She winks.

“Yeah, something tells me he wouldn’t be boring.” I giggle, grabbing a can of blackberry Bubly out of the fridge.

“Well, what Alex doesn’t know won’t hurt him.”

I help Felicia clean up the rest of the living room before deciding to call it a night. I have to be up early tomorrow to drop Sawyer at pre-school. Serena has a doctor appointment and with Alex leaving town in the morning, she can’t be two places at once. I wander down the stairs which lead into the family room where Alex and Kevin are playing the latest NHL game on Xbox. Kevin groans as Alex scores in the top right hand corner.

“Top titty!” Alex laughs, taking a swig of beer as the game resets for the next face off. Kevin’s eyes meet mine and he give this head a shake.

“Your brother cheats.” He insists

“Cheating does run in the family.” I shrug before continuing on down the hallway, passed the bathroom and into my room. As much as I’d love to linger in the room and watch, I know Alex would be suspicious of my presence.

I choose the basement for my room as it gives us all some privacy from each other. Sometimes, it feels a little weird to be living with my brother’s family. I’ve been with them for two years now, but it didn’t start to feel weird until after I graduated from college. I attended the University of Minnesota, Go Gophers, and earned a B.S. in Business Administration with an emphasis in Leadership. After college, I struggled with knowing exactly what I wanted to do. I loved the interworking of businesses, but the corporate world just doesn’t feel like a fit to me. When Alex asked for me to come nanny for them almost a year ago, it felt like a welcome chance to delay entering the professional world. Now, seeing my peers with their entry level positions, I worry that maybe I’m behind. With everything Alex has given to me, I feel guilty leaving them to pursue just anything.

I walk to my desk and sit at my laptop. I spend a few minutes flipping through various social media sites before I pull up Netflix. As I’m plugging my headphones into my ears, I hear footsteps down the hall, entering the bathroom next to my room. I know it’s either Kevin or Alex. My heart beats harder in my chest hoping it’s the Swiss native. A minute passes before I hear the click of the door. I click open an episode of One Tree Hill to not look like I was waiting for whoever was in there.

“This your room?”Kevin pokes his head into the doorway with a soft knock.

“For now.” I say as I pull my headphones out of my ears.

“I see you like the color purple.” He notes the lavender walls and my dark purple bed spread.

“I do. Our family was big Vikings fans growing up.” I notice the confusion on his face. “Our professional football team.. American Football.”

“Ah.” He nods his head in understanding. “They any good? I went to a few Titans games in Nashville.”

“Mmmm depends on the year.” I tell him honestly. He walks a little further in and looks at the picture I have on my wall next to the door of Alex, Nick, and I at Alex’s first game for the Wild. Kevin smiles at the picture then looks at me.

“Nice room. Maybe I can see more of it sometime.”

“I’m sure you’d like that.” I tell him with a smirk.

“Bed looks comfortable.” He gives me a playful smile that hints at sinister things.

“Oh my god.” I laugh, hiding my pink face. “Don’t you have video games to play? You better get back before Alex really starts to cheat.”

“I probably should.., and yet I’m much more interested in what you’re doing in here.” He shrugs, leaning back against the wall next to the door.

“Pretty boring stuff. Just Netflix without the chill.” I motion for him to exit the door and he laughs, nodding his head.

“Hint taken. Hopefully I’ll see you around.. Sam Stalock.”

“There’s a high chance you will. My brother is your teammate.” I remind him, sticking an ear bud back in. I’m trying to play it cool like I could take him or leave him, but my insides are all squishy at his presence.

“Hey Sam?” Kevin calls to me as I’m about to turn back to my computer.

“Yeah?”

“Thanks for the fun night. I don’t get to hang out with many people my age when I’m in America. So, it was nice joking around with you. But, I really do hope I’ll see you soon.”

“Me too, FiFi.” I respond. His nickname comes out playfully and I watch as he licks his lips suggestively. He hovers in the doorway for another moment before lifting his hand in a brief wave. I wave back and watch the doorway long after he leaves. I hope this isn’t the last I’ll see of him.

Later that night, after Kevin leaves and I’m winding down for bed, there is a small knock at my bedroom door.

“Come in!” I yell and Alex opens the door slowly.

“Hey, just checking if you need anything before I head out of town tomorrow.” The Wild are gone in Canada for the next five days visiting the Calgary Flames and the Winnipeg Jets. This should give me a few days to cool off and forget about the team’s newest member.

“Just a couple of wins.” I answer him, smiling at my own cheekiness.

“I’ll do my best.” He laughs. “Can you take some video of Sawyer’s practice on Thursday? He wants me to show Suter, so he can get some pointers on his stride. Kid is a hoot.”

“My goodness. What happened to being a goalie?” I laugh. Alex shrugs.

“I think his mom has been the influencer behind that shift. She thinks he should be a defensemen.”

“Well, it is less stress for a hockey mom.”

“Yeah that’s probably true. Sometimes I still think mom is going to have a panic attack when I’m starting.”

“To be fair, you like to rush out to play the puck at the blue line a little too much.”

“Hey, it works.” He insists. “Alright, I’m going to go finish packing.”

“Safe travels, Al.” I tell him, turning to pull my comforter back and slide into my flannel sheets.

“Night, Sam.” Alex begins to pull the door shut but stops and pops his head back in. I look at him expectantly and watch as his face twists into a frown. His blue eyes meet mine and he pushes out a sigh. “Look, there seemed to be something between you and Kevin at dinner tonight. I’d appreciate it if you could avoid getting entangled with him. Kid has potential to be a stud and he’s a good looking dude. But things are going well in the locker room right now and we don’t need any distractions as we head down the playoff stretch.”

“Okay.” I roll my eyes at him, resisting the urge to call him a few choice words. Why do men always think women are distractions?

“Sam.” Alex’s voice has gone low and serious.

“Alex.” I say back, mimicking his voice.

“Stay away from Fiala.” He doesn’t give me an opportunity to respond before he is out the door, leaving me with the sense that this topic isn’t up for further discussion. I stare at the door, his words echoing in my head.

There seemed to be something between you and Kevin at dinner tonight.

A few hours ago, I would have told Alex no problem. But now, I’m not so sure. How do you avoid someone that you inexplicably feel drawn towards? I glance at the picture of Alex, Nick and I from last summer. It was my 21st birthday and we are all wide eyed, cheeky smiles, and a bit sunburnt from spending the day on the boat. I smile softly, remembering. Alex has been my best friend, biggest supporter, and protector since we were kids. My thoughts turn to Kevin and the connection we were both feeling tonight. To find someone that you have instant chemistry with is rare. I know this. But I also love my brother and know I should tread cautiously from here.

I turn off the lamp next to my bed and slide further down into my sheets. I pull the comforter up close to my chin and sigh. No matter what is potentially brewing between Kevin and I, mine and Alex’s relationship is more important. I owe it to him to put aside my other feelings and stand with my brother as the team pushes for the playoffs. This should be no problem. All I need to do is avoid the Swiss native all together. If I don’t see him, I won’t feel any of the connection and can easily honor Alex’s wishes.

Yeah. That is what I’ll do. Avoiding Kevin Fiala should be no problem.

I close my eyes, trying to ignore the sadness that has settled into my chest. Sleep comes easy, but relief from reality doesn’t. Within a few minutes, I’m dreaming of brown eyes and a Swiss accent.

[thotsforvillainrights]

Hi!!! I have a tumblr blog But I'm nervous to ask without anon-

May I request shin nemoto x trans male reader Where it kinda is rivals to lovers headcannons?

Take your time!! ^^

Btw I'm a huge fan of your work!!

( I love Shin and I miss him dearly)

~Rivals To Lovers~

headcanon|scenario|imagine|match-up

-I can only imagine what he'd do if he felt threatened in anyway when it came to his boss and his job. He's already delusional enough about Chronostasis being so close to Chisaki. It's borderline obsession that can be taken from him being 'saved' by his boss. That's why when you enter the inner circle of the Hassaikai, he's immediately threatened by your presence. Who are you to join the great ranks of the 8 Precepts? It's the 8 Precepts for a reason, not the 9 precepts. What made you so special as a lower level grunt to have worked your way up like this? Shin has seen others struggle for years that have been here way longer than you and still not be moved up as quickly as you did.

-He sat for a long time contemplating this and what your quirk might be. Perhaps it was something extremely beneficial to the boss's plan...more beneficial than him? No of course not, that would be foolish...but still???

-He was even more displeased when he found out Overhaul would be putting you on team with him and Deidoro. Why couldn't you be with the others? There were plenty of suitable teams you could be on so why should he have to deal with you? What if you weren't good enough? What if you only ended up dragging him down and setting the group back? He already had his hands full with one idiot (*ahem* Deidoro), so why should he potentially have to deal with another? To his surprise, you weren't an idiot but instead much worse...cocky.

-You always made sure to smirk at him whenever a mission was completed and Overhaul complimented his work over Shin's own. Nemoto refused to be in your shadow yet that's where he seemed to find himself more and more these days. There was an imaginary ranking within each little team. It didn't take a rocket scientist to know he was above Deidoro. So now that he's behind you of all people, it really makes his blood boil. This causes him to complain to you and about you on a daily basis. He was a harass and you could only roll your eyes and smile. The two of you probably spat out more witty comebacks than Chrono and Mimic combined. You both worked well together when you weren't silently arguing or picking apart everything each other did. Neither of you would admit to the shift in tension after a particular mission that left you confused.

-One mission that landed you in hot water for the first time and ended with him having saved your ass. A mission than landed you in a hotel room with (yes I know...) only one bed. A mission in which you found yourself sitting on the bathroom floor while he tended to your wounds. Insults about how you need to be more careful shift to softer words, opening up to one another that happened so suddenly you were both confused as to what happened. Sleeping apart but waking up too close for comfort due to the heat going out in the middle of the night and the two of you seeking each others warmth for comfort unconsciously. Not a word exchanged for a day or two when you returned to the base.

-Suddenly Nemoto realized he was looking at you in a different light these days. He finds himself wondering where you are when you're not at work, texting to see if you were alright but following up with a snide remark to hide his relief in knowing you'd be back tomorrow. Buying lunches for each other and using the excuse that you didn't want to deal with a sluggish teammate...oh and not to mention Deidoro picking up on the energy lately and teasing the hell out of you two. Even your insults had become more like two partners playfully teasing each other rather than cut-throat insults. "How unfortunate..." Nemoto mumbles when he realized why he was taking so much care into his appearance this morning before work. "How unfortunate indeed."

-Yes it doesn't take a rocket scientist to realize when someone has fallen in love.

[aceofwhump]

Howdy, Ace! I hope you're well. Do you have any fic recs for panic attacks? I'm not fussed about the fandom really. Thank you so much!

Oh my god I love panic attack fics so much. I've read sooooo many of them. Okay here are some of my favorites:

(9-1-1 Fox) you never said i wouldn't go through it (just that i wouldn't be alone) by jcp_sob_rjl_lmep Summary: Buck woke up abruptly, staring at the ceiling, hands already clutching his chest. His heart pounded and his lungs heaved for air. What was it that Coma Hen had told him? That maybe his panic attack hadn’t been a panic attack at all, but his real body going through something? Buck was pretty sure this one was a real panic attack. aka, Buck wakes up from a nightmare and needs to know Bobby is alive.

(Ted Lasso) Bird by Bird by ExuberantOcean Summary: The stress of Nate's betrayal and the press over his mental health causes Ted to have a panic attack while with the Diamond Dogs. They help him through it.

(Cursed) Scents and Sensibility by SuperLizard Summary: Chapter one: panic attack, vomiting

(9-1-1 Lone Star) Backfire by annaslibrary Summary: Tumblr prompt: Hey could you maybe write something where T.K. has a panic attack at the station and no one can calm him down but Carlos and his dad please.

(Graceland) Panic by petersnotkingyet Summary: Bates wakes up in the middle of the night and finds Mike having a panic attack. Bromance ensues

(Hawaii Five-0) hold me tight (or not at all) by icoulddothisallday Summary: Danny has panic attacks. Steve finds out

(MCU Tony Stark) Hydrophobia by Majinie Summary: Tony is fine with water. Really, truly, honestly. He can drink, bathe, shower, everything. There is no problem. He's fine. Tony is fine and Clint is an asshole. Or, how Clint triggers a panic attack in front of the whole team and tries to pick up the pieces afterwards.

(Lucifer) Deal by hearmerory Summary: Chloe didn't spend five years being best friends with the Devil just to let him go back to Hell. But recovery? Relationships? These are not things Lucifer has ever found easy. In the weeks after Lucifer's return from Hell, he and the humans, angels and demons who surround him find out how long, hard and traumatic those roads can be.

(Lucifer) Se Permaneço ou Me Desfaço by RushAndTomatoJuice Summary: When she'd suggested a trip to her mom's cabin for Christmas, Chloe hadn't expected the snow to undo the Devil.

(Lucifer) Take Me To Church by SilverWolf7 Sumary: Lucifer finds out the meaning of the word 'trigger' when on a short errand with Dan. He does not like it, or his reactions, at all.

(Lucifer) now i wake up by your side by JuliaRose12 Summary: “Sweetheart,” Chloe continues as she slowly drops to her knees in front of him. “Lucifer, you’re hyperventilating.” She reaches forward and lays a hand over his thigh. It takes everything in Lucifer not to push her away. Maybe the conversations they seem to keep having, about how Chloe feels safer with him than with anyone she’s ever known, about how she isn’t afraid to face danger if it means keeping her family safe, are starting to sink in. Lucifer looks up at the exact moment that Trixie steps towards him, and it’s like waking from the nightmare all over again. or, Lucifer has a nightmare that triggers his fear that Chloe and Trixie aren't safe around him. Like always, Chloe brings him back.

(9-1-1 Fox) The Future is Brighter than any Flashback by SilvertonguedClotpole Summary: "No dramatics" Bobby had made them promise- this would be a perfectly happy and fun BBQ that the entire crew was in desperate need of- and so, of course, something had to go and happen, right?! How could a simple handmade 'gift from the heart' from Chris end with Buck spiraling in Bobby's arms in the middle of Athena's back yard? With memories and insecurities that he had hidden away drowning him like the tsunami had tried to and the weight of losing Chris, and nearly Maddie, and Eddie finally taking its toll.

(9-1-1 Fox) Swimming Against the Tide by Scribbles97 Summary: The 118 get a call to a water park. Everything is fine until someone turns on the wave pool. The wave pool that Buck is still in.

(Downton Abbey) Same Sad You by angryessays Summary: "Thomas discovers that leaving service and moving to sunny California doesn’t cure his latent depression. He feels increasingly worse, thinking he’s letting Guy down or that he misled Guy. Guy is super patient and helps Thomas get back on his feet." (angryessays)

(Leverage) but don't you shake alone by tragicallynerdy Summary: Trapped in a collapsed building, an injured Eliot and panicking Hardison do what they can to keep each other alive, safe, and whole.

(Bridgerton) Don't let it show by LemonSquash Summary: The moment after Anthony Bridgerton heroically carries Kate back to the manor after her accident falling off the horse. Where Anthony Bridgerton runs out of the room, but this time Benedict follows him.

(MCU Loki) did you see the fear in my heart? by unintentionallyangsty Summary: During their first winter on Midgard, Thor drags Loki into a nearby town to, following Bruce's suggestion, see how the Midgardians decorate for the holidays.  Loki is less than thrilled by the development (and by the idea of celebrating a Midgardian holiday, in the first place), and things reach a breaking point when he finds himself in an unfamiliar place, surrounded by strangers.  All but one, that is. 

(MCU Loki) looking in their eyes (when they're down); by unintentionallyangsty Summary: Mobius makes a small error in judgement, and Loki encounters an unanticipated trigger as a result. (Or; Loki needs more comfort than he is willing to admit, following a particularly difficult field mission, and Mobius is more than willing to assist).

(Lucifer) F Is For Falling by SK_Kasai Summary: "Never fear asking a question, urchin." He said after a while of uncomfortable silence, awkwardly clasping her hand in his ridiculously larger one, "Never to me, especially." "But what if I make you sad?" She asked, brow furrowing, "I really don't want you to get sad, Lucifer. You're already sad enough." "Sad?!!" He repeated, scoffing, "The devil doesn't get sad, urchin. Really, now, where do you even get these outlandish ideas?" She regarded him, unamused, still trying to decide if she should ask that question of hers. "I won't be sad." He sighed, curiousity burning, urging him to know what the bloody question had to be, "I give you my word." She sighed again, before closing her eyes and nodding. "Did it hurt when you fell from heaven?" Lucifer went for a laugh, the horrible pick-up line version of her question flashing in the back of his mind. But he failed. Tremendously.

(Shazam Billy Batson) little and broken (but still good) by MashpotatoeQueen Summary: Billy Batson finds himself alone in a crowd after losing Rosa in the quickly moving bustle, and everything is fine, really, really. It's fine. Except that it's not. It's not, because there's a little voice in his brain that goes, 'Oh no, not again,' even though that's perfectly irrational and obviously not the case here. Obviously. (He maybe sort of panics. Just a little.)

(The Witcher) an incessant burning 1derspark Summary: “Jaskier,” Geralt prompted after a while. “Can you look at me?” He shook his head and hoped that his mumbled "no" would be heard. Geralt sighed but didn’t try to move him. His hand was running a comforting trail up and down Jaskier’s back. Eventually, he spoke again. “Yen, she told me some things, but I didn’t realize…” He trailed off, and Jaskier could hear him swallow. A click of guilt in the throat. He reached over to Jaskier’s arm. When he didn’t startle or protest Geralt took his arm. He rubbed a gentle finger over the wax burn. It was a barely-there thing, nothing to get all riled up about. But even having his arm exposed made Jaskier want to crawl into a hole. (Or Jaskier’s newfound aversion to fire, and the comfort he deserves.)

(Downton Abbey) And suddenly there was a new door… MemberOfTheFates Summary: Post movie: A series of fortunate unfortunate events leads to Mr. Bates’ early retirement and Lord Grantham being in dire need of a new valet, at the same time at which Richard has to quit his job in London. Thomas really needs help realizing that he is and ever will be an important part of Downton Abbey. Fortunately, there are many people who want to see him happy and who will go to great lengths to achieve that. Will the Downton staff and family accept who he really is, when it is right in front of their eyes? And will the constant risk, his relationship brings endanger everything he fought for? OR the one where each and every person in Downton Abbey learns how much it takes to care about Thomas Barrow.

[emeritus-fuckers]

hello i was wondering if i could participate in the match up event?

I am afab and nb, I use any pronouns :) I'm cool with being any gender or being with any gender neither matters much to me

I lov the ghouls and their silly little shenanigans :)

I'm pretty feminine looking, I'm 5'1 and I'm built like a comic book male superhero like broad chest and shoulders but a straight line from the ribs down like a upside down dorito w legs

I'm asian so my eyes and hair are dark, my hair's like a shoulder-length wolf cut ish thing... idk I just hack at it. sometimes I wear glasses, but sometimes I just feel like being blind. When I get dressed I pretend like im dressing up in a fun little costume so my day is more whimsical and silly my go-to is like sailor uranus prince-type girl crush but a wizard or a wizard who is going on an epic expedition to recover lost artifacts but no matter the outfit the key is that I look like I'm secretly a merlin-style cartoonishly evil wizard. So i guess maybe like goth grunge academia something something pinterest buzzword Oh and I have major rbf, and it makes ppl scared of me

I'm an introverted person and I tend to be very logical but. I think different from a lot of ppl apparently. I've been described, to paraphrase, as "sort of ominous and mysterious but actually funny", "uncanny and unsettling in a good way", and "awkward and weird but its endearing" which just sound like insults. I like to live in my head and make silly stories and things to play with. Like every tumblr user I've got fucked up mental health and bad parents so I am kind of like one of those freaky ass chihuahuas that is always scared and shakes and bites people and has digestive issues. I tend to be hard to read or sort of deadpan so I like fucking w people since they can't tell if I'm joking bc i love mischeif and japes. I want to be a silly not-quite-supervillain like Dr doofinshmirtz or like a trickster archetype sort yk

I was a pretty intense synchronized swimmer for like 9 years I competed at like opens and nationals and all that when I was in school but my university doesn't have :( I'm on the rowing team now but I would rather do synchro esp since being my main thing was being flexible and it has no advantages in rowing lmaooo I've been a huge vocaloid fan since elementary school so I've been around in that community for a while (I am so well-adjusted). I like to make vocal synth covers and draw, especially when I'm able to work with producers to provide art for their vids it's so cool hehehehhe I mostly listen to vocaloid music but I like a lot of metal stuff as well that's how I found out abt gonst. I also like 2 play video gamez, I'm so fucking bad at them but I think it's rly funny so I just spend hours giggling and watching myself get mauled over and over.

I love horror a lot but I'm less a slasher girlie and more of a supernatural psychological tormet girlie esp if its got mythology or religions shit involved. Im majoring in history bc all good history ppl like silly metal and I wrote this instead of my abstract that's due in like an hour bc I have no idea what to do for the topic 🥲🥲

- the fuckin wizard

This post is part of the 1000 followers match up event. Entries for the event are now closed.

Your match is... Zephyr

They like listening to you talk about your major and interests. He's a very good listener.

While they might not be the best swimmer, they enjoy the activity and if you want to show off, they'll absolutely let you and be super proud.

He doesn't mind how unique your style is. He probably wouldn't really try to match clothes with you, but they'd try their best to buy you stuff you'd enjoy.

Since he doesn't really walk much, they picked up drawing and started doing it with you. They're surprisingly good at it for someone who just randomly said "I'm bored, maybe I should start drawing".

Also, horror movie date nights! They're also much more of a psychological horror person, but his favorite is of course the paranormal (he finds it hilarious) so you two take turns picking the movies.

Video game dates included, too. He's got a PS3 and the first three Uncharted games, as well as some others. Their favorite is Uncharted 3.

He'll insist you wear your glasses. He knows the consequences of ignoring his health. It's not fun.

~

Written by Nosferatu with the help of the wonderful and of @ask-zephyr-ghoul (ilysm pookie).

[bvtbxtch]

About Me

Carly - she/her. 26

Libra Sun Libra Moon Libra Rising 

Canadian 

Bisexual but am in a loving relationship with my husband! We have been married for just over a year and dating for 10! 

I went to university for Drama and Teaching. I was teaching grade 7-9 french and drama but have taken some time off for my physical health. I really love teaching but am hoping I can find a new job in a different school or outside of a traditional classroom! 

In my spare time, I love acting and singing. I just performed as the highschool lead Ellie in Freaky Friday the Musical and was going to Nationals for the World Karaoke Competition (I was actually going to make a battle of the bands fic and record reader’s band’s cover myself hehe). I had to back out of the karaoke competition unfortunately because I had a pretty big health scare and almost died. 

I live with a lot of chronic illnesses. When I was young I was diagnosed with Celiac disease. In highschool I was diagnosed with psoriasis. I eventually was having issues with my joints in my early 20s (my hands were locking and I was tired all the time). Lo and behold, I got diagnosed with psoriatic arthritis as well. Last year, I struggled even more with my health and my arthritis seemed to be getting worse. I ended up having to go on special medication, which stopped working and I was then diagnosed with fibromyalgia in June. Because of a lot of medical trauma, I have also been diagnosed with GAD and chronic depression. It has been a really hard couple of years and I have been struggling a lot but I am really happy that I have a great medical team behind me.

I started this tumblr in the midst of my lowest point both mentally and physically. I fell in love with ST4 and Eddie Munson (like most of us hehe). I was so inspired by the fanfics that I had written and I wanted to give my own go at it, Hence Angry Heart. Y’all ate it up and here we are and I am so thankful for you! 

My favourite foods are poutine, ramen noodles and cookies.

I love playing video games and my favourites right now are Dead By Daylight, Slime Rancher and Overwatch 

I also really enjoy reading. My favourite author is Stephen King and I am currently reading It. My favourite books of all time are The Shining and The Duff. 

I have a shihtzhu named Boss and he’s the love of my life! See a picture of him below. 

I just want to thank you all one more time, I have loved being on this journey of self-discovery and reigniting passions for writing and creating. I am really thankful for all of you!! I have met such amazing friends and supportive people. If you feel like you ever want to talk, my requests or inbox is always open!! Thank you for sharing your space with me.