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starsofang · 2 days

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Change of Heart

hitman!simon x f!reader / part 8

previous part

tw: alcohol use, angst, mentions of death

When life has completely and utterly failed you, you hire a hitman to take you out, too afraid to do it yourself. Instead of killing you like you had planned, he strikes up a deal with you, and you're too stubborn to bail out.

Waking up the next morning was the biggest slap in the face. It singed your skin with a burning sting, leaving you disoriented and lost. It was as if the brutal force of realization had hit you so hard, it knocked any form of thought right out of your mind except for pain. Irrepressible pain that caused you to feel numb.

Simon had left. All of your worried texts proved futile. What once showed as blue was now a sickening green that glared back at you. Your number was blocked, your messages unable to go through, and you were left an even shattered version than before. You were glass shards left to lay on the floor, you were a broken wind chime that could no longer provide a charming ambience.

You were broken and useless, tossed to the side like a damaged piece of scrap.

Simon had lived up to his name, and disappeared like a ghost. Drifting off into shadows of darkness, seeping into them and becoming one, never to be seen again.

You were hurt. Scratch that, that was a nice way of putting it – you were devastated. The walls you had so graciously taken down for him were now jagged pieces of debris with no mortar to glue them back together one by one. They were unrepairable, crumbling far too much to be saved.

Everything you ever learned about Simon felt like a lie, because that’s what he did – he lied. The glass was too foggy to tell the difference between what was a lie, and what wasn’t. If there were any parts of Simon that were truthful, you didn’t believe it. There was no grace of god to be there to lend a guiding hand to point you in the right direction. All you had was your gut, telling you deranged criticisms.

He lied to you, this was all a game, and you fell for it.

You should’ve known, really. A man like Simon was not one to love and be loved, not when he had an apparition named Ghost to steer him away from any attachment. After all, spirits could not grow devoted to a mere mortal woman who had nothing left to offer. You were stupid to think otherwise.

Graves was a bad enough person. He hurt you, tormented you, claimed you in order to assure your life was a living hell, with or without him. Now, the smallest part of you didn’t think he could be as cruel as Simon at this moment. It was a brainless thought, one you knew was far from true.

Simon never hurt you, nor did he treat you as bad as Graves.

But at least Graves didn’t have the gall to abandon you like an unwanted dog on the street.

Your mind was ping-ponging back and forth between truth and deception. You didn’t know what was real. It hazed over you, muting out every bit of you that was left inside and replacing it with nothing but cracked foundation.

Nothing was real. Nothing was worth it.

You didn’t leave the house for the entirety of the day, nor the next. You stayed in the confinement of your own home, feeling like a caged animal with no way out. You were slowly decaying away, losing the truest part of yourself, no longer able to see her in the reflection. She stared back at you with a ghostly image, whispering about how disappointed she was in you, how hateful she felt towards you.

She whispered about Simon, burdening you with reminders of what could’ve been if you were simply a little less broken. Bringing him up just to dig the knife in more, twisting it under your skin and basking in the bloodshed.

You were spiraling, just like you always did, because it was all you were good for. Simon was another excuse to crumble back into a deeply rooted self hatred. He was just a chess piece, a single card in a stack of dozens, while you picked it up and returned to your old game of reckless entertainment.

Day fourteen came before you know it. And you spent it completely by yourself, pondering why you ever made a deal with the devil in the first place.

It was easy to fall back into old habits when there was nothing there to offer recovery. Relapsing was what you did best, even when Simon was around, and you’d be damned if you didn’t do it again with him gone. It was a part of you, this endless cycle of self abuse, and it wasn’t going anywhere. It was simply on a temporary pause, now returning with more fiery persistence than before.

Alcohol was the only home you ever knew. It warmed you to the bone, engulfing you in a buzzing fervor. It welcomed you back with open arms, holding on to you with no intent of letting go. You were its lovely hostage, and you had grown Stockholm Syndrome.

Weeks passed by of tireless nights filled with the bitter taste that burned in your throat on repeat. Weeks were spent holed up in your apartment, nursing the only friend you had. This time around, you weren’t picky. You took whatever you could get, uncaring of the repercussions

And even in those weeks, Simon never left your mind. It was like a punishment for being good enough to fuck, but not good enough to stick around. It tortured your mind to the point of insanity.

The more alcohol you had, the more the memory of him became cloudy. It was exactly why you drowned yourself in it. You didn’t want to picture Simon’s face. Didn’t want to picture the way his eyes lit up when he saw you, or the way his smile was a bit crooked and off center. You didn’t want to picture him, and the future you grew too eager for, one that consisted of the two of you. Two puzzle pieces fitting together, only to be wretched apart and pressed down in separate corners.

You were completely losing yourself. All over a man who had broken you.

The cycle repeats. And repeats. You let it repeat, until hopefully one day, the alcohol would prove to be enough to give you the death you so greedily wanted.

It wasn’t until nearly four weeks in utter disarray that the cycle began to morph, railing off of the tracks that you worked so hard to have control over.

Deep into your daily routine of excessive drinking and wallowing in your own self-pity, the door knocked. You nearly missed it, brushing it off as your imagination. You didn’t have visitors, and the only one who cared to take that spot until leaving you was Simon.

Glancing around your apartment, you visibly winced at the disheveled sight of it. Bottles were thrown around carelessly, littering the kitchen counters and living room floor, where you were currently residing with a nameless show playing on the television. Hell had flown through your apartment, and it was your fault it had gotten this way again.

Old habits die hard. And you were always its unfortunate victim when those habits needed a host to leech on to once more.

Clambering up from where you sat on the floor, you somehow made your way to the door by the grace of god. It was late, and if you read right from the clock on the stove, it was past midnight. Anybody could be outside – a killer, an intruder, a thief. It was a mix between not caring about dying, and having enough logical sense to know nobody dangerous would knock first, that had you opening the door.

An unfamiliar man stood tall in the frame, bushy facial hair, sunken eyes that barely held a spark, almost as broad and stiff as Simon. But it wasn’t Simon, and this man was a mere stranger.

“Jesus,” the man muttered under his breath at the state of you. You frowned, feeling small and weak in comparison. After a moment, he cleared his throat, speaking again. “Need to talk to you. Can I come in?”

“I don’t even know who you are,” you muttered, narrowing your eyes.

“M’a friend of Simon’s,” he explained woefully. The sound of Simon’s name coming from somebody else’s lips and not yours had your heart clenching with a dull ache. It sent ice cold chills running through your veins. “The name’s John Price.”

You stared at him with a look of disdain. You never heard Simon mention him before. The more you thought about it, you never heard Simon mention anybody. He was an enigma that you fell into too easily without even knowing a lick of who he was outside of your temporary protector.

“If you’re looking for him, I don’t know where he is,” you replied dryly, gripping a hand on the door and beginning to close it. Before the hinge could click into place, John’s boot stopped it, wedging itself between the door and its frame. He gave you a tight smile, one that had you tensing.

“I know where he is, dove. I said that I need to talk to you.”

The two of you became trapped in a staredown, one that you were too exhausted to fight to be the champion of. Begrudgingly, you opened the door wide enough to allow him to slip in, shutting it behind him. You watched as he took in your apartment, surely judging the whirlwind of it. He wasn’t exactly the type to hide away his distaste, if his mockingly amused expression was any type of indication.

“What do you want?” you asked him, disregarding your own mess and instead focusing on him. He turned to look at you, flashing you another smile. It seemed trusting enough, kind even, but by this time, you knew better.

“Came to offer you a deal, of sorts,” he vocalized. “Might I sit?”

You glanced over at the living room, shame bubbling in you at the sight of the bottle you’d been indulging in before he came around. “Sure.”

You trailed behind him when he took his seat on the couch, letting out an exaggerated sigh, leaning back into it. His display of comfort made you feel uneasy. You made no effort to join him, opting to stand in the middle of the room.

“You were rather close with Simon, weren’t you?” he asked, causing you to scoff to yourself.

“Sure. What’s that got to do with anything?” you asked grimly.

Price hummed to himself, tapping his fingers against his knee. It caused a faint, muted sound of rough, calloused fingertips to chafe against the material of his pants. “Figured so. Allow me to ask you somethin’. You know of Simon’s occupation, right?”

“Yes.”

“Right. Silly me, that’s how you met, isn’t it?” He chuckled to himself. You weren’t sure what was so amusing. “Well, here’s the thing – his performance has been a bit… hindered as of late. I have a strong inkling that it’s because of you.”

The air in the room was tense, nearly suffocating you. Price had such a soft aura that was hiding menacing intentions. You could see through it.

“I need a favor from you, doll.”

“And that is?” you asked carefully.

He smiled at you, cocking his head. “I need you to reject him. Tell him you’re better off, that you don’t need him, whatever you can say to make him get his head back in the fuckin’ game. This job of ours isn’t a joke, you see. I can’t have him slackin’ off. That’s how he’ll end up caught and thrown in jail. Once it reaches that point, I can’t help him out of it. That’s why I need you to help me before that happens.”

Your eyes widened in bewilderment at the sheer nerve of Price. Asking you to tell Simon off, to lie and say you were happy without him? Fuck, the proof was in the pudding – you weren’t, and you could almost guarantee that Simon would know you were lying from one single word. Sure, you were mad at him – pissed – but you also wanted no part in this game Price was playing.

The more you sat on it, the more it became twisted. You were thrown in a tangled web of deception and betrayal, stuck to it like glue, fighting for your way out.

But how much of it was betrayal? How much of it was trickery?

Price’s words echoed in your mind on repeat. They formed together, creating a clear picture.

Price had been the one to have Simon toss you out. He was the reason for your harrowing spiral. He was why Simon had left you, treating you as if you didn’t exist. Just a pawn in his game, and you were too stupid to realize it all sooner.

“You did this?” you snapped. Price raised an eyebrow at you, but said nothing. “You… you’re the reason for all of this, and now you’re asking me for help to lie to him? Are you insane?”

His expression twitched into a flash of annoyance before returning back to a mask. Alarms rang in your head. “I’m doin’ this for Simon. You’re a little bird he fell into when he shouldn’t have, and now I’m tryin’ to fix it before it’s too late.”

“Bullshit. You’re doing this to save your own ass.”

“I’d highly advise watchin’ yourself, doll,” Price muttered in warning, eyes narrowed and expression darkened. “You don’t know anythin’ about what we do. Don’t know how dangerous it is for you to be involved with Simon, and for Simon to be involved with you. I’m savin’ Simon’s ass from fuckin’ up one too many times.”

The atmosphere was even thicker than before. It was hard to breathe. It made you queasy, as if poisoned with a heavy gas that may just kill you if you inhaled it for too long.

Price and you stared at one another, both stubborn and pulled taut. His anger simmered to a low boil once the two of you took that silence to gather your thoughts, but it didn’t entirely vanish. You could still see a flicker of a flame in his eyes.

He was dangerous. Not somebody you wanted to get tangled up in, but you had no choice. You were too deep into this webbed mess, and it was only a matter of time before it came to bite back at you.

“What’s wrong with him?” you finally asked, voice quiet and solemn. You crossed your arms over your chest, turning your gaze away from him so you didn’t have to see his display of weak sympathy and mock judgment.

“He fell in love with you, that’s what’s wrong,” Price bit back, sneering. “Now he’s weak. Can’t do his job correctly, got his head in the fuckin’ clouds, snaps at everybody who tries to talk to him. He’s riskin’ himself, riskin’ us, and I can’t afford losin’ a brother over some girl.”

Price’s words were bitter and cruel. It only irritated you, pricking at your skin until it drove you mad. All calmness that had festered in your brief silence washed away, replaced with the old flame of your anger.

“Losing him?” You laughed bitterly, throwing your head back in disbelief. “Sounds to me like it’s your fault and not mine. Have you ever thought that maybe you’re the reason he’s all fucked up?”

Price stood from where he sat on the couch. There were no longer kind features adorning his face. It was replaced with twisted anger, morphing into something unrecognizable. When he stepped closer to you until you were nearly nose to nose, it was like looking into the eyes of a feral wolf, ready to tear you apart at any given second.

“Wise words comin’ from an alcoholic,” he muttered lowly. It was a hard pill to swallow. “I was tryin’ to be nice, doll. I was givin’ you an option. A choice. You’re just as fucked up as Simon. The difference is that you’re goin’ down a path nobody can save you from. I can save Simon.”

The words slapped you harsh in the face. It was brutal and cruel, and he showed no remorse for the damage he was doing. This was a man who got what he wanted, hurting everybody in the process so long as he achieved it. His goal was to save Simon from his impending doom, and he was willing to take you down to make it happen.

“If you really cared about Simon, you would’ve never let him get to this state in the first place,” you retorted back just as cruelly. “It’s not my fault, and I’m not going to sit here and let you blame me for it. Take a look in the mirror and you’ll get your answer on why he’s being this way.”

Silence. Aching, deafening silence. It tinged the air with a sour smell. The two of you were making no moves of backing down, and it was simply a recipe for disaster.

You didn’t know why you were defending Simon. After what he did, he didn’t deserve your care. He didn’t deserve to have you bandage over his name from the countless wounds he’d inflicted on it by leaving you behind after taking all of you in this very apartment.

However, with a missing puzzle piece being added to the pile, that being Price, you couldn’t help but offer your support from afar. It was clear he had no hand in this game. He was a pawn, just as much as you.

“I’m not helping you toy with his feelings,” you whispered. This time, you sounded defeated rather than angry. Broken, sad, dejected. “He doesn’t deserve that.”

Price sucked in a sharp breath, stepping away but keeping his gaze pointed to you. He said nothing for the first few moments, eyes flickering over the worn out lines on your face. Empty eyes, ones that were surely full of life at some point in your life. Perhaps even lit up with Simon around.

He had taken that away from you, and it was only then he was realizing how cruel he was being. All of it, for the sake of protecting his own, of protecting Simon. He was so consumed by the thought of keeping Simon out of trouble, that he only sought to create more for you. A civilian, one who simply got wrapped up in the wrong crowd.

No outsider had ever cared for Simon like Price, Gaz, and Soap did. They were all each other had, bound together by an unfortunate calling. Nobody was allowed in, or out.

Then you came along, and Ghost had quickly become Simon again.

“You’re not goin’ to make this easy for me, are you?” Price sighed, shoulders deflating, releasing its built up tension.

“No. I’m not,” you agreed grimly.

“Stubborn one, you are,” he hummed, and dare you say it, he sounded amused. “Can see why Simon likes you.”

You glanced up at him, noting the faintest of smiles on his face. It was barely visible, a ghost on his lips, but even through your hazed exhaustion, you could see it.

“Tell you what,” he began, crossing his arms to match your stance. “I’ll talk to him. See what I can do. M’not promisin’ anythin’. This isn’t the type of life I want you wrapped up in, but I can see that you’re only goin’ to wallow here until you drop dead. I don’t want that blood on my hands.”

“What are you saying?” you asked suspiciously.

“I’m sayin’, that I’ll try to see if it could work. Again, m’not promisin’ you anythin’, doll. But if you’re the reason Simon can get his head out of his ass and stop doin’ sloppy work, then I’ll see what I can do.”

It was no guarantee, but Price was trying. One moment, he was begging you to hurt Simon to the point he’d never think of crawling back to you. Now, the story had changed, and he was making a peace offering.

You weren’t sure whether or not to trust him. You shouldn’t. It was a bad idea.

But the thought of seeing Simon again, to mend the broken bond you had formed, caused you to agree.

Simon was fucked. He’d drowned himself in a world of pure guilt ever since he’d blocked your number and called it quits. He was miserable, more than he’d ever been.

He didn’t feel guilt. In fact, he wasn’t supposed to feel anything at all. He was Ghost, after all, and ghosts didn’t feel. Yet with you, the narrative had switched. It was as if the gates of heaven had opened up, offering him a chance at redemption. He felt everything all at once – love, care, affection, longing, heartache.

Everything felt right with you. It was like he had finally found his home, only to have it torn away from the grasp of his hands. No matter how much he tried holding on to it, it proved a fruitless effort. It was gone before he even resided.

Simon’s mind became a jumbled mess. He returned to the empty shell he was before when nothing mattered and he only saw the world through a red-colored lens. It was straining, it was harsh. It hurt to wake up everyday and see a colorless world waiting for him.

His shattered, frail mind affected everything he’d ever known. Work became a chore. He was messy, careless, and the darkest part of him wished he would be caught so he could force himself into punishment for hurting an angel sent from above that was placed in his life to nurture him.

It was what he deserved. Simon was a man who fell in love, and Ghost was the devil that reminded him that he was undeserving. Unworthy.

You deserved better than him. You deserved the world, and Simon was the one who would take from it with greedy hands caked in the blood of God’s creations.

Everyday burned with an itch to see you, to send you a text. He missed you, but he hated himself more. It stopped him from reaching out, caused him to pull back on the reins and pace himself. Nothing could scratch the burning itch except for the brutal reminder that you deserved better.

The weeks were hell without you. He’d grown agitated at everything around him, going as far as to snap at Gaz and Johnny when they attempted to console him, to snap at Price out of unfiltered rage at what he made him do. He was too far gone, and the only foundation he had left was beginning to crumble, all because of him.

Damn Price for taking you away, and damn you for making him fall in love.

Simon didn’t know how much more he could take. It was eating away at him, like a parasite feeding off of its host, draining him of all soul. Even now, as he sat in his own apartment, hidden on his balcony and smoking all of his worries away with hopes of succumbing to the nasty tar that threatened to rise in his throat every time, he was decaying. Withering away, like a fragile flower.

The night was dark. The stars didn’t shine as brightly as they did on your balcony. The air didn’t feel as pure without you to share it with him. The smoke didn’t wisp up into silly, little shapes, and instead, tainted the air with polluted illness.

It was positively suffocating.

As Simon nursed the cigarette to the very end, stubbing it out with his boot and carelessly leaving it littered with the rest of them on his balcony, he heard the faint knock on his door. He silently prayed it was death, here to take him away and rid him of his pain for good.

It wasn’t death, but it was damn near close.

“Price,” he grumbled at the sight of the older man. It was too late for him to make an appearance, so he wasn’t sure why he did. Maybe Price had truly given up on him and was here to offer mercy.

Price didn’t care for greetings, stepping past Simon and into his apartment. Simon followed after him with his gaze, mentally preparing himself for another lecture. It was bound to happen at this point, seeing as Price was fed up.

Simon knew he was putting their lives on the line by being reckless. He just didn’t have it in him to care.

Closing the door behind him, Simon kept his distance, not uttering a word until Price spoke first. The man in question lingered around his apartment, seeming to stall with time, too choked up for words.

“You need somethin’, sir?” Simon finally asked. Price lifted his eyes to look at Simon. For a moment, they were unreadable. Masking away his thoughts, tucking them far in the back of his mind.

Price let out a deep exhale through his nostrils. He stood there in silence for what felt like eternity. Simon could see the gears shifting in his mind, working overtime.

“Go and get your bird back, Simon,” Price sighed, but to Simon, it sounded like church bells ringing on a Sunday morning, beckoning him home.

so many of y'all thought the last part was the end, but i'm not that cruel ;( i promise

#call of duty #cod #simon ghost riley #cod x reader #john price #simon riley x reader #simon ghost riley x reader #ghost simon riley #simon riley #ghost cod #hitman!simon #hitman au #cod mw3 #ghost x reader #cod fanfic #cod mw2

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ghouljams · 2 days

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The Price of Fire(Prologue) Rating: M Tags: John Price x oc, 3rd person POV, fae au, witch oc, fae!Price, first meeting, slow burn Summary: Lio is a young witch. Young, not stupid. She's made it this long without being eaten, and she intends to make it longer. Until she meets a man deep in a cold, silent, forest. He's handsome, and all the more dangerous for it.

Lio marks nearly two decades of life without meeting a witch-eater. She’s heard stories from her mother, has seen the fae all her life, but to actually meet one? No. Precautions are taken and kept: faerie circles are avoided, the path is followed, and wards are drawn on her skin in charcoal ink. Lio knows better than anyone where the forest meets the fae wild and she skirts that invisible barrier with each step. Every trip into the forest is a risk, so every interaction with the fae must be closely monitored. Too many witches meet their end to hunters with honey on their tongues.

But the forest must be braved, witch-eaters or no, and Lio finds herself forced deeper and deeper into it as the winter creeps along. Winter is a time of sickness. A busy time for witches. Ingredients for spells and potions grow in the dark recesses of the wood, and no amount of hoping will coax them closer to the forest edge.

There are no birds or bugs to guide Lio as she weaves her way through the trees. Silence the best marker for how deep into the forest she’s traveled. It’s snowed recently and the branches of the trees hang heavy with their winter burden. Red curls frizz out from under the witch’s hat breaking up with stark whiteness, a spot of fire in the winter chill. Lio’s feet crunch through the thick snow, she follows deer trails, keeping track of broken branches and tracks. The deer know where it’s safe to travel, even if they can’t tell her why. She trusts that she’s on the right path.

There’s a crispness in the air that almost chokes her lungs when she tries to draw too deep a breath, ice ruling even the oxygen that fills her lungs. It’s the warmest part of the day, and still Lio cups her fingers over her mouth to warm them. Her gloves do just enough to keep the wintery chill at bay as she breaks branches off of trees and tucks them under her arm. She stops occasionally, following her mental path, tracking the deer, winding through the tree trunks, stopping when she pleases, and collecting wood as she goes. Her hatchet weighs heavy on her belt, hardly touched.

As she walks the forest grows darker, the trees crowd closer together. She murmurs a quiet spell, the charms in her boots heating up to keep the cold from chewing through her toes. Lio stops to check her trail, her head turning this way and that, watching her tracks weave through the forest. The line of steps is straight, the forest hasn’t turned her around yet. Still, it’s getting quieter. The leaves don’t rustle the same here, the breeze dying among the trees as easily as the animals do.

Lio walks past a man leaned against one of the tree trunks. She ignores him, and continues her walk forward. In her periphery she sees him side step around the wood only to reappear ahead. He raises a brow questioningly when she stops short. Lio glances around the forest, blinking once, twice, and a third, before settling her eyes back on him.

It takes a moment to adjust her sight to the fae. Her magic draws the veil back from her eyes as they take in the man before her. The heavy black wings, feathers dragging through snow and the protruding horns from his forehead speak to what he is. Though even if she couldn’t see him, she’d know he wasn’t human. There’s something in his eyes, a golden ring around the blue that speaks to magic. His beard is too neatly kept, his smile too generous, he’s handsome in a way that she’s never seen. Dark and dangerously alluring.

He takes a step towards her and her fingers tighten on her bundle. The young witch takes a step back. Witch-eater, her mother’s voice whispers in her mind. Charming fae whose only goal is to increase their magic, eager to eat up any witches foolish enough to fall for their honeyed words. Despite the chill that runs through her blood at meeting him, Lio smiles, polite in the face of a danger. There are rules for these sorts of things. Rules that have been pounded into her head until she knew them in her dreams.

“You’re far from the trail,” The fae man says bluntly, inviting conversation. Lio hums, she knows, she can see the lights of the willowwisp starting to drift between the trees. She’s taken a step too far into the wild, her home forest bleeding into the faerie’s realm. She’d noticed the trees growing bigger, but hoped she still had some time before running into anything.

“I am?” Lio feigns ignorance, “I hadn’t noticed.”

The man turns to look away from her, smiles to himself at her lie. She can see the way his tongue moves over his teeth while he thinks, even with the wire of his beard in the way. His eyes are as icy as the winter snow when he looks at her again.

“It’s dangerous this deep in the forest,” He tells her. As if she doesn’t know. As if he doesn’t know she knows.

“I’m quite alright,” Lio responds, starting on her trail again. She intends to pass him, but he catches her arm, and hauls her to a stop.

“If you’re smart,” He warns, “you’ll run home, little witch.”

Lio stares at the hand gripping her arm, the black soot that sticks around his nails, she wonders if he was tending a fire nearby. Tipping her head Lio meets his gaze, she’s young, but not stupid. At least, not quite so stupid as this man thinks.

“I’m being careful.”

“You’re being foolish.”

The man’s grip on her tightens, and he turns her to follow the trail back. The trees straighten Lio’s winding path, the forest bending not to her will, but to his. She looks at the man again, there’s a tightness in his jaw that makes her think he’s holding something back. His eyes burn as they stare into hers. He smells like blood. She raises a brow at him, ever too eager to poke sleeping bears. The rumble in his voice is worth it when he tells her:

“If you’re fool enough to wander this far into the forest, you’re fool enough to be eaten.” A harsh squeeze to her arm as she glares at him is followed by his deep, “Run along.”

“If I’m foolish enough to be eaten, you’re a fool to turn me around,” She turns back, takes her first step back down the path and feels his hold on her loosen. Something unwinds in her chest as his fingers drop from her arm, some tension she’d been ignoring slipping free. Lio takes her first full breath in as many minutes and feels the sting of ice in her lungs.

“Maybe.”

His low rumble makes her pause, the hair on her arms standing on end at the chill in his voice. He wouldn’t eat her now would he? Lio raises a gloved hand to her chest, her fingers feeling for any threads between the two of them. Nothing. She hasn’t misspoken, hasn’t fallen into any traps, she wonders why he’s letting her go. There’s nothing stopping him from eating her, from tearing apart her flesh like an animal.

“Thank you, for the advice” Lio tosses it over her shoulder, baiting the man, “I’ll try to remember it for next time.”

Again her arm is caught, and she’s dragged back. Her back bumps against the fae’s sturdy chest, she softens her breathing, pushes down panic. There are wards sewn into her clothes, written over her skin, she’s protected. At least from magic. She can only hope that his teeth, his fingers, are less willing to do the dirty work. The strength of him- she can’t compare to it. If she tried to run, would the path twist under her feet? She doesn’t hold the forest’s reins like he does, can’t direct it as expertly as the fae. She’s barely come into her magic and now she’s going to be eaten.

The man leans over her, drags his hand down her arm to hold her wrist. He raises it, his fingers pressing to her pulse as he inspects the seal on her gloves. Small magic, she tells herself. Nothing that would interest the fae, certainly nothing that would interest one like this.

“And if I decide to cash in your thanks?” The man asks. His voice is too low, too quiet, it splits through the silence of the forest, the chill of his breath skirting her cheek. Lio steels herself for the pain as she speaks, unsure if he means it as a threat or something else.

“You won’t.”

“I might.” There’s a smile in his voice, one that makes her smile in turn. Relief slips down her spine.

“Any fae that would make a witch turn around isn’t one that would cash in a favor so small.” Still, Lio feels the soft sting of her thanks tethering them to each other, a debt to be repaid. Small but present.

“I could say I saved your life.”

“But you won’t.”

“No,” The fae agrees, “I won’t.”

His release is soft. His hands relax and drop their hold on her, letting Lio take a few steps forwards. She wastes no time looking back, following her footprints back through the forest towards home. It’s a lucky thing to meet the fae and come away without a scratch. Luck she isn’t going to waste on something silly like ‘goodbye.’

Price watches the witch pick her way back through the forest. There’s no fear, no hesitation, in her steps. There hadn’t been any on her skin either, and no fluttering pulse or short breaths. What an interesting woman. Her eyes were so clear, staring right through him. A seer, he thinks to himself, so she must be used to these sorts of sights. He feels a pang of interest, ill-advised curiosity, bubbling in his chest. There was something about her.

She was warm.

For the first time Price shivers against the cold of the winter forest. The heat which had been pressed into his chest disappears with the witch. The season wraps its tendrils around him, bringing him back into the familiar chill. The trees shake off their snowy burdens, filling in the holes left by the witch’s feet, holes which seemed to melt all the way to the dark leaf strewn dirt. Price can’t help smiling to himself. He supposes winter isn’t for everyone.

divider by @/saradika

#x oc #cod x oc #1fae1 #fae au #oc: witch #captain price mw2 #captain john price #captain price #john price #captain price x oc #john price cod #john price x oc #female oc #nobody can come for me because the pov character reads like an oc #I'm leaning into the oc-ness #you're all forced to deal with Lio now

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1nthedarknessofthenight · 1 day

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﴾ i drink your blood and i eat your skin, part eight.

pairing: hwang hyunjin x f!reader

genre: vampire au

word count: 12,4k

warnings: blood, only a mention of an animal but not described in any way!

author’s note: im so sorry for not writing again sooner, I still have some exams before me to do. though i can’t wait for my summer break, because I will finally have the time to write again and you can look forward to some other stories of mine that are almost rotting in the drafts. and btw thank you again for the amazing support <3

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If only the things you done in the past could be erased the moment you realized you were in the wrong. You wished that after realizing your mistake, it all could be left behind. Why are you so stupid sometimes? Why did you speak before thinking first? Maybe you do deserve the pain he inflicted on you. You were asking for it but you only wanted to know the truth, you didn’t expect that it would somehow affect him so much. It was like he also learned the truth that night. Your head perhaps is just a hole filled with insecurities which you just can’t overcome because you simply won’t expect the fact that someone might actually like you. Like you, to get to know you better, see and hear about your biggest fears and dreams, helping you get pass them, overcome them and accomplish them. It feels like forever since you thought about your feelings this much. You were so used to blocking them away.

You want so badly to just let go and enjoy all of this but you have been alone for so long that you don’t even know if you want to be loved anymore. It is such a crazy idea to you, a reality now…maybe. You dream about being loved that is all you do and maybe it is the only right thing for you. You are a lover girl, not a loved girl…that’s how it is supposed to be in your head. Are you sabotaging yourself?

A man such as himself falling in love with you? Tall, handsome, so charming and yet so dark and broken, wanting only you to be his forever. You want so badly to do the same but it is all just so scary. For quite some time your world started to become dull, everyday was the same. You realized, you were always alone after all and suddenly someone came in to your life, wanting to change that? What if this is the same for him? He has seen the world grow, the circle of life, people dying and being born again. It must be so lonely for him in some way, no one stick around long enough. Like he said — if you were like him, maybe you would understand but you don’t want to say that you somehow do understand…feel something. How could you not really? Even after what happened, because of that you want to get to know him better even more. And you’re so crazy in the head that you almost liked how he touched you…

You are awake now, still however feeling yourself slip into unconsciousness every once in a while. Your body is dripping in sweat, nightgown clinging on to your skin. Though you don’t remember any dream that could possibly make your body react in that way and it is always so cold in your room. A sigh leaves you as you roll onto your back. You hate how much you enjoy the silk sheets pooling over you, caressing you. The blissful state of almost falling asleep again is abruptly interrupt as something drip down on to your skin. You wipe it off but as you do, it only happenes again.

As your hand wiped off the substance which you thought was your sweat, your coated fingers graze your nose. The awful coppery smell hits you instantly, making your face scrunch up in confusion laced with panic. As you open your eyes, they fall onto your hand. You breathe out in shock at the crimson blood as another bead drips into your open palm, making your eyes tilt up to the direction it came from.

…You have never seen such a horrifying sight. Your mind is completely wiped out of any thoughts because you couldn’t simply make out what you are seeing right now. However this gruesome picture stares right at you, almost like presented in a way, so it gives the most gut wrenching feeling out of you. Your whole body stiffened but soon began shaking wildly in panic and fright and every passing second you look at it more, it becomes more real to you. The red color covers your field of vision, you couldn’t see nothing more than that. The once beautiful eyes of the animal are now dull, life completely vanished and you could see the pain in them. The once vibrant white color of its skin now painted red, dripping down on your bed. Your breathing becomes heavy but you couldn’t get any air into your lungs, every intake punches you into your chest and soon your lips open to release a blood curdling scream.

Eyes blocked with your hot tears, made you fall onto the ground as you so desperately try to scramble away as far as your stiff muscles would allow you to. You feel like throwing up, swallowing your spit and trying to fight the awful feeling in your stomach. Your hands curl up to your chest as you sat on the floor, you could feel how much your heart was pounding. You must be dreaming…yes, you must be. This is just another nightmare. Just a nightmare. This is not real. This is not real. This is not real—

You jump harshly as the door to your bedroom swings open, so fast that it flew onto the wall heavily and with such a force that the door almost fell off its hinges. Your hands fly to your ears at the loud sound, still not being able to catch your breath as every intake burned inside your chest. Your bloodshot eyes fall to your nightgown, seeing how much it is stained with that godawful substance and you wish for the floor to swallow you whole.

Your cries are so loud that you don’t even hear someone rushing in to your room, accompanied with another pairs of footsteps. The first person to come in to the room, immediately rushes to your trembling figure, momentarily stopping to look at the sight that now is permanently imprinted in your mind. You feel cold hands touching yours, flinching instantly away from them. You already know who it is, you don’t know how but you just do. Maybe because you feel such a weird sense of calmness wash over you but you are in such a state of shock that you couldn’t do anything other than jump away from the touch.

Hyunjin thought that by being one of the most powerful creatures on earth meant that there was simply nothing to be afraid of…till now — when he heard that sound. Till he heard that horrible sound of your scream…the way it sounded — so in pain, so scared, he immediately felt it too. He didn’t think twice, rushing to your room, so blinded by his own fear that he didn’t even see his family being right behind him, following him. When his eyes fell onto your curled up body, shaking like a leaf, he almost fell down on his own knees in despair. However the well known smell, made him for a second stumble upon the cause of all of this. His heart broke at the sight and also for you. He tried to calm you down but how? You don’t even want to look at him, scared that you will catch a glimpse of it again.

“No—no, I can’t, I can’t–“ Comes out of your lips as soon as his hands leave you. Your shaking hands press onto your eyes, slowly falling down to your knees, crunching up the fabric of your nightgown tightly but you could still see the blood.

Hyunjin glances back for a second at the bed, catching eyes with his equally horrified best friend who stood next to your bed before he also looks down at your body. Only by touching your hands, his own were completely covered in it and for the first time in a while he feels repulsed by the crimson. It gives you pain then why should it give him pleasure?

Your eyes flicker back to the canopy, only feeling more shocked and disgusted at the sight, you just have to be sure you’re not imagining all of this. This is so sick, who did this…why?

Hyunjin looks down again at his hands coated in blood and for a minute he wonders if any of it is yours but he would already know if yes because your blood simply smells different from any other. You aren’t injured physically but this imagine is grater and even more painful than any other. Someone must have done this with a purpose…hurt you. His eyes flash with anger, his priority was only you at this moment, every day, every night. Revenge can wait.

“Search the grounds.” Says Chan. Hyunjin didn’t acknowledge his presence at all till now and looking at him he realized, he wasn’t the only one in great anger. “Even the woods.” He adds, the men who followed their master in to your room nod before scrambling away.

A sob broke the silence, making Hyunjin look back at you. “It’s okay, love-“ He shushes you softly, putting his arms around your body, caging you but still not touching you, only hovering because you didn’t give him your permission.

Your cries die down a little, still hiccuping slightly as the panic slowly goes away. Shaking your head at his words, your eyes close as you tilt your head up. You go to take a breath through your nose but it is only clogged up because of your crying, making you breathe in with your lips. Your eyes open, finally looking at him. Your puffy and red eyes meet his azure and piercing ones. In a sense they calmed you a little as you thought of the ocean every time you would look into them.

Hyunjin’s heart broke even more at your gaze. He could see the pain, panic, sadness while also laced with sleepiness at the corners. How could someone do this to you…

His arms fall a little to his sides and you finally seem to register how close he is to you but you don’t pull away. You are safe now. “Let me help you clean up.”

You don’t give him a response and like he could read your mind, he knew that you weren’t against it. You don’t even know if you can stand up on your own. Your hands press onto the floor, trying to stand up on your shaking legs and before you could stumble even a little, he is already there. Like every time since the night you two met. His hands flew to grip your upper arms. His touch feels different from the past, still strong but now also gentle, like he is holding a piece of glass. You are not sure if it is because of the situation but it almost feels like his cold touch, could set your body on fire. You feel empty, traumatized and completely uselessness. The vampire helped you up, but it is more like he is standing and walking for you both. You have never felt so light in your life and it wasn’t just because of his strong arms, you felt — tired.

He leads you to the bathroom, closing the door slightly while walking you to the bathtub. You let out a small hiccup at his gentle touch, so careful, feeling completely undeserving of his attention at the moment. “I’m sorry, I’m so so sorry…” He doesn’t response, letting him push you on to the bath, making you sit down at the corner as he hold you in his arms a little longer. Your brain almost forgot about whatever happened outside this door as he rubs small circles on your skin. Your eyes were too scared to look into his, breath hitching as his thumb trails over the naked skin of your shoulder. Hyunjin also got a little lost in the moment before he looks down at your blood covered nightgown. That sight makes him snap back to his senses, hands leaving your body.

When he stepped out from your line of sight, your eyes fell to the mirror. Blood covered your neck, face, even your hair line and basically your whole upper body. You become sick to your stomach, remembering that this is the blood of an innocent animal. Looking at your hands you reminisced the way its soft skin felt on your skin, just a few hours ago. Now they only made you see the crimson that stained them.

As you look upon them, your view is blocked by a hand, traveling over your skin of your fingertips till it comes to softly hold yours. Hyunjin kneels down before you, holding your hand out for him to wipe off the blood from your skin. He was so soft, it almost felt like your skin was being kissed by a whiff of cold wind. His cold touch calms down your racing heart and you almost want to grumble in protest as he keeps his touch at minimum. It felt so nice and jokingly cooling. However in some way you are thankful that he respects your boundaries.

“I can do it myself—“ You whispered, watching the towel slowly turning red while your skin is finally being able to breathe again.

“No.” He said, stubbornly, almost as he was mocking you but on his face was no smile whatsoever.

You watch him wash your hands with the towel, the water in the bucket where he dipped it in progressively getting darker. You are slightly mesmerized by how much bigger his hand is compared to yours. Yes, you do look at them quite often but seeing his long fingers wrapping around your wrist like that is a first. You become aware that you were still dressed in the same, a little see through nightgown and it makes you self conscious. Your other, now clean hand, comes to tug at the fabric so it isn’t so tight on your body. Watching the man before you, you let his hand linger on your wrist, fingers pressing into your pulse.

He could feel how much your heart is racing, but it is not like he couldn’t hear it with his own ears as well as the pulsing blood underneath your skin. Hyunjin went to wring out the towel, turning back to you with his back now straight. Your breath hitched slightly, timidly lowering your gaze. Even if he was the one kneeling he has the power here. How wrong you were…

Fingers, like a feather touching your chin made you look back at the man. The hand on your nightgown formed into fist for a moment as he now washes away the pain from your features. He still holds your chin between his fingers as he wipes the blood, sweat and tears. The embarrassing noise you almost let out, gets stuck in your throat as you look up at him. How can someone look so good from this angle? His concentrated gaze made you feel timid, so many thoughts suddenly running through your head and ones that made you lower your gaze.

Your lips release a choke breath. At the same moment you look away from him, reality hits you yet again. You can still remember the horrible sight you saw just moments ago. “I don’t understand what happened…why would someone do this —“

He sighed at your confused, saddened tone, lifting your chin higher slightly to meet your eyes and suddenly you forgot you were even angry at him yesterday’s night. Whatever happened yesterday was so silly and so stupid, you really don’t understand yourself sometimes. He was so kind to you, even with his nature, he would never hurt you or wouldn’t even want to see you get hurt...Why are your eyes suddenly wide open? You feel horrible that this — what happened made you realize how stupid and ungrateful you were. You just don’t now what to do…so you rather do nothing or just push further and further away.

Your eyes unwillingly welled up with tears, falling down your cheeks freely and poolling in to his hand. “Poor animal, oh my god was it yours — the horse.” The words fall out of your mouth, sniffling at your own words. When you looked at him, he didn’t quite meet your eye and for the first time you could see how much heartbroken he truly was. “I’m so sorry…”

He suddenly looks back at you, his other hand still tracing the towel your tear stained face. “There is nothing for you to be sorry for…I should be the one apologizing.” Hyunjin whispers the last words, his hands falling to his side before going to grip the bathtub you are sitting on.

You immediately understood what he is implying, it is not like you weren’t thinking about it earlier. “No.” You whisper back, trying to meet his eyes but his are set on the marble floor. “I am sorry.” For everything…you wanted to say. You wanted to say sorry for being so detached.

He shakes his head at your words, a short dry laugh falling from his lips. His hands on each side of you caged you under his glare but it wasn’t an unwelcome one, he looked saddened just as you were about all of this. “Someone did this to you — without me knowing even a single thing…” He sneers but his voice becomes little as he looks at your leg briefly where your mark, bruise, he left on you would be. It burned under his gaze. “No one knows a thing and they could have hurt you. I would never forgive myself for that…” His voice almost cracks at the end, recalling what he did yesterday, feeling like he is no better than the person who did this.

His broken tone rings in the air but only a single move it took to change the whole atmosphere of the room. As Hyunjin looked up at you, his hands gripped the edge of the bath so tightly, you could hear the stone cracking under his palms. You corner almost at the wild look in his azure eyes that are now just a flicker more red than usual. “I will find whoever did this and I promise you, I’ll kill them for you.” He says, lip curling up, giving you a small glimpse of his sharp teeth.

Your heart starts to beat even faster with his words and before you could stop yourself, your hand flew to his. Your hand grabbed his, scared that he would break the bathtub with his unhuman strength. His eyes cleared the moment your warm skin touches his freezing one. Both of you glance at each other in shock and just as quickly as you touched him, you pull away.

Your eyes look at your own hands in disbelief as he look at his in amazement. How are you so warm? Hand so smooth and warm that he wondered how it would feel like to have it back on his skin. What you did, in some way feels different from any other touches you have shared before. It felt intimate, just the split of second giving away such a raw emotion in which he now wants to drown in. He tried to say something but words some times are not enough nor necessary. At least your said precious skin isn’t covered in blood anymore but the big stain on your nightgown is still a big give away of what happened.

Hyunjin then stands up without a word, throwing the towel away before stopping to look through the slightly open door. His heart sank as he gazed back into the bedroom, just as his friend was being removed from the canopy of your bed. How come someone was able to sneak in and do this without anyone hearing even a thing? He knows better. This doesn’t feel like an attempt to kill you — his dead heart seems to skip a beat under this awful thought. This was a sign of a warning.

“From now on, you will be with me. I want you by my side.”

You said nothing, because there is no point in arguing and also you liked his idea better than being in here alone. You can’t stand the thought of ever sleeping in that bed ever again and the once beautiful, comfy sheets made your stomach flip. You again turn to look at yourself in the mirror opposite to you, grimacing at the image. Your messy bed hair was sticking to your skin, eyes and lips puffy with your nose runny from the crying, you can’t understand for a moment, how his appeal could be even possible.

Standing up, you again unstick the material of your nightgown from your skin. It felt uncomfortable, not to mention you felt dirty and the way he could probably see the outline of your body didn’t make you pleased. You go around the tub, just where he stood but before he could let you walk pass him, he stops you.

You stumble slightly when he suddenly turn around, blocking your way with his towering body. You look up at him, shakily breathing through your nose as he glared into your eyes. “Don’t look.” He probably meant whatever was happening inside the room right now and you would definitely feel better of not knowing. It wasn’t like you would want to look anywhere else beside his alluring eyes.

You both take the time to look at each other’s features. You marvel over his perfect pale skin that almost seemed translucent as you could see the veins under the thin layer of skin. It felt like you were seeing him in a completely different light. You also wondered if he was enchanted with you as much as you were with him but that didn’t seem right in your head. Maybe if you were clean and would be wearing something nicer…you suddenly want him to see you in the best version of yourself. He literally has only seen the bad and the worse. Where did this come from?

You listen to the noises just outside the room, they however felt like miles away as he grazed his hand over your left shoulder. Hyunjin was experimenting, trying to see if you would feel repulsed by his touch but you didn’t even flinch. Your heart skipped a beat slightly and from what he could hear it wasn’t in a bad way. His hand, completely now on your shoulder, fingers extending that his index finger almost reached your collarbone, trailed down the length of your arm. His hand awakened goosebumps all over your body, the simple touch made you feel so embarrassed as it was so exciting to your untouched skin. His hand stopped at your wrist, short familiarity spiking through you as he left it there.

Who was more nervous? You or Hyunjin? He would like to say that it was him. His hand tightened its hold, still careful not to hurt you…like he did before. Hyunjin throws the thoughts away, trying to enjoy the fact that you are willingly letting him touch you. He has a hard time to look into your big curious eyes, his own glancing at your hand that clunched the fabric of your nightgown closer to your chest.

He quickly looks away, turning around still holding you and finally walking out of the bathroom together. Your eyes were deadly set onto the floor but you couldn’t miss the fact that he purposely blocked the sight of the bed with his body. Though you are still looking at his hand around your wrist. What if he would be holding your hand instead? Maybe interlock your fingers together? That was probably too much and so early for either of you to handle.

When you step outside the bedroom, you feel like, you can finally breathe. Your eyes flicker to the man who is still holding you to the other people passing by you. They walk by you with heavy, fast steps and as you turned around, some of them would stop at your bedroom or continue their path further. So many people, men and women of all ages. It looked unnatural as because you were so used to being alone in this place. Or maybe they already did walk passed you like this, maybe your eyes just weren’t opened till now.

You jump slightly every time your feet would land on the freezing floor, missing the carpets. You glance down, grimacing because you see blood seeping through the carpet, there was no way you could miss it, even on the dark colors of the material. Hyunjin seems to feel your shift, even if if your emotions were all over the place. He could read people just by the smallest difference in the beat of their heart. Well, sometimes when it comes to you. He looked back at you, eyes traveling to the direction you were looking. Such an attention to detail, even he didn’t notice it. His head was just too occupied at this moment.

Confused you glance at him as he took few steps before you, finding his back turned to you but that wasn’t the thing that made you so confused. It was his irregular steps. He looked like he was dancing and soon you realized what he was doing. He was making a path for you to follow so you wouldn’t step in any of the dirty spots on the carpet. You wanted to thank him but words were not necessary at the moment. However, you, nervously, squeezed his finger that was resting inside your palm and he in responded squeezed your wrist back. How can he know you so well when you speak so little?

He lead you further into the house, the furtherest you have ever been so far. You both passed by the big staircase, going right into the direction where you haven’t been before. The hallway at this side of the house wasn’t almost lit at all, some candles though keep you from stumbling in the dark. The air also was colder but not too uncomfortable, maybe because you’re getting used to it. Hyunjin stops almost at the end of the corridor. Right before slightly open door, turning to you to let you in the room first.

Before you step inside, you glance into the room where the welcoming soft hue of orange was coming from. As you took small step inside, Hyunjin for some reason thought that your small uncertainty in your steps meant you’re suddenly uncomfortable with the hold he has you in. He released you at that, fingers twitching as he could still feel the small electricity at his fingertips. When your hand falls unexpectedly to your side, you turn in confusion at your company who without even a glance walks past you into the room. You don’t want to question his behavior anymore, it seems like these mood swings of his are a normal occurrence, so you just follow him inside.

This room was even bigger than yours. Ceilings even higher, decor even more dramatic and everything just so more monumental. You two however weren’t alone in the room as some maids kept running all over the place and are thankful for their presence at the moment. Your eyes flicker to the bookshelfs, lining the walls, to the small table rounded by a couch and some chairs, to another door, probably leading to a bathroom, till they stop at the big bed. Because of the candles that the maids are trying so hard to light up, you could at least get a glimpse of the room like this. Your eyes travel over to him, standing before you, watching you, before you had to again avert your gaze somewhere else, right back to the bed where you can tell how the sheets were unmade.

“Is this your bedroom?” You wondered out loud but you already knew the answer as you glance timidly back to him.

“Yes.” He said.

You hate this when you realized this is the first time you have been in man’s bedroom like this. You simply nod at his agreement, trying to ignore your own thoughts by looking more around his room, finding even more new things to marvel about because of the lit candles. You could see the small streeks of light, coming from the top of the heavy curtains as well as some papers on one of the tables in the room. You again remembered what happened just moments ago. It was so quick, all of this. From the sight to his kind words, touch and now this. He must’ve just woken up as you turn to look at his clothes. They were still the same clothes that he wore last night, another reminder that all of this happened so quickly. You don’t know, if it’s the fact that you don’t have a life to begin with but everything that happened made you so tired but you can’t even think of sleeping again.

Two women passed by you, watching them put something on the bed. The sparkling fabric winked at you and you immediately realize that those are the dresses that were given to you. You look away, however he is already watching your every move, noticing the small look of wonder on your face.

“I haven’t seen you wearing any of the dresses I gave you.” Hyunjin said, turning his back to you slightly as he leans over his bed to pick at the fabric of one of those dresses. “You don’t like them?” He almost sounded hurt.

You knew that he was just playing with you. “I didn’t know they were for me.” You respond, cringing how stupid it sounded. Who did you play dumb for?

He however wasn’t offended by your lie at all. “I wish to see you in them, but of course only if you want yourself.” The vampire added quickly, not to sound too controlling. “It is not wrong to enjoy these gifts I give you.”

To be fair, you can’t lie that there wasn’t a single moment when you almost picked out one of them, to maybe even just feel the fabric between your fingers but dressing up was the last thing on your mind right now. You are still shaken, confused and traumatized, you kind of wished that all of this was just a dream. He knew that even if it didn’t seem like it. He completely understands how you are feeling right now, he is only trying to keep your mind off it.

Hyunjin panics a little as your heart didn’t calm down, still fast, your lips sat into a thin line. “Would you like a bath?” He asked, more like himself as you finally glance back at him at his words. “You would want to yes…” He thought, almost frantically.

Your eyes flicker down at your nightgown again and at the big stain on the front of it. “Yes…but you can clean up first.” You say, looking at his bloodied shirt, he following your statement by also looking at himself, like he only now realized.

“Don’t worry about me, blood has never bothered me.” He waved you off. Till, he saw it being the cause of your pain.

You frown. “Pobably but it is still from your—“ You stopped yourself before even thinking to continue. His face turns into sorrow for a second at the mention of his beloved, now deceased animal. “I’m sorry.”

You look around the room again, trying to escape the conversation. The beautiful decorations kept your mind occupied, eyes traveling to the little angels at each corner of the room. Under the dim light they almost looked haunting. His canopy looked even more magnificent and monumental than yours, if that was even possible and definitely less bloody...The colors of the bed however were still the same as yours, the sheets unmade, duvet almost on the floor.

“Aren’t you tired?” You spoke up again, eyes plastered on the bed. When you were met with silence you glance back, him expressing a small confusion on his features. “Like it’s morning.”

“Vampires don’t get tired but yes, sometimes we need sleep to regain our strength but I don’t think I can sleep, knowing you are now in danger.”

“It is alright, you can-“

“No, it’s not!” He raised his voice, the sheer loudness making you tremble as well as the other people in the room who momentarily stopped everything they were doing just to look at him. It was like he himself got shocked by his own reaction but to him it was the only right one. He doesn’t understand how you are somehow so unaffected about this. Yes, you are still slightly shaking but it seem like this is taking a bigger role on him than you. “Someone was in your room, someone got inside without anyone knowing and left a message that for sure wasn’t a felicitation of me courting you.”

You ignore the fact that he basically said you two were to be wed or something like that, because you only realize by his words that he is right. You’re in danger and without even a single clue who the enemy is, but you know that it must be someone powerful as they got away with this so easily. “But I don’t understand why anyone would want to hurt me — I’m no one.” You mean it. You’re a human with one friend, no enemies that you know of and you have a normal, quiet life — till now.

Hyunjin can’t help the small anger rising in his chest from your words, shaking his head in disbelief that you would even think something like that. “You’re not no one, not only for me but also for others.” That made your heart skip a beat and from the way his voice was radiating sincerity. “Someone knows who you are and that leaves you in a dangerous situation…In my long life, I have never feared the enemies, I made along the way, till now.”

You go silent, only sighing deeply from his confession. He really does now how to use his words to make you go insane in the head. You can’t help but feel slightly giddy inside because of the way he always speaks to you, so kindly and passionately, in way that you have only read in books and wondered — just wondered if anyone like this truly exist. You do not know him that well but you can’t imagine him having any enemies at all...maybe his charms didn’t work all the time.

Yawning, you quickly put your hand over your mouth, silencing that embarrassing sound but it only made Hyunjin’s frown deeper. “You can go to sleep…you’re safe now.” He doesn’t think that there will be even a second of not him listening to your beating heart. The possibility of there being a scenario where he wouldn’t be able to, made him scared…he is scared.

You do feel how your eyes are getting droopy, your legs becoming soft but the thought of sleeping after all of these events really wasn’t possible. “I don’t think I can–“ You sigh in small exhaustion. However your body is telling you a whole different story and he could see it. The thing that happened just moments ago, made you truly awake, it made your eyes wide open, for the first time since you got here. Or maybe since you met him?

You started to see different colors, ones that finally made you feel alive. Like you were born again, in some sense. But was it really necessary for a sweet, innocent animal to get hurt for this? It also could have been you... The thought of some stranger creeping up on you while sleeping, you completely unaware and the person choosing to give a message like this instead of not simply killing you, made you fear even more. “—I’m still sorry for your horse…” You say again, you just can’t help but feel a little bit responsible for this.

Hyunjin has to keep calm, emotions too much for his cold heart to bear. “Like I said, it wasn’t your fault…the most important thing is that you are alright.”

Yes, of course. That was the most important thing…

But you do not in fact feel alright. You have just seen the most gruesome image, you have ever seen. It is all your fault. You do not want to be alone. You want to stay with him — he now makes you feel safe. How could you be so heartless and cold towards him? Was it just your defense mechanism with everything that brings you happiness? Finally being seen, made you frightened as there was also someone or something that saw you. It was in your room, the only goal in their mind to scare you…away?

Set of footsteps echo behind you, stopping just at the threshold of the room. You had to focus your eyes on this new face you haven’t seen before. The young man’s skin, shined in the dimly lit room, eyes reflecting like the eyes of a wild animal. He looked so young, hair longer blonde and eyes striking you with their intensity. He momentarily looked at your figure but his full attention was however on the vampire behind you. They stared at each other, the blonde giving a look which you couldn’t quite understand but Hyunjin certainly did.

You feel him right at your back, cold from his skin so close to yours. Turning around, you glance between him and the young man. His close proximity didn’t startle you that much as he with a deep inhale, backs away from you himself. “I have to go now…” He looks down at you with his blue eyes, searching for forgiveness. You don’t want to be alone…for the first time, you really need his company in some way and even if he didn’t like his nonpresence as much as himself, he needs to do at least something about this situation you’re now in. He could see your small frown, you are trying to hide but there is a hint of understanding which he is thankful for.

He takes a step closer to you but stops midway with his lips parted. Whatever there was that he wanted to say, was replaced by other words, you could see the true words reflecting in his eyes. “If you need anything, just go down to the end of the of the corridor, I will be there.”

The tension could be cut with knife, aware of the audience you two still have, you simply nod in understanding, wrapping your arms around yourself as to form some sort of barrier between you and him. Why does he have to look at you like that? Like he could see right through you or maybe trying to, flickering his vibrant eyes all over you.

Your lips also parted but you close them again as he walks past you in a sense of hurry and you didn’t even know it was because he almost decided to stay here with you…

────

And in fact, sleep didn’t find you after all. Every time you would close your eyes, you would see the gruesome picture, the sad and grey eyes staring right at you, the blood…The bed you are laying in is still cold, the heavy duvet couldn’t give you the warmth you were searching for. You desperately need someone, just to comfort you. You have never felt so scared and paranoid. Your eyes would travel all around the room, till you memorized every detail in the dimly lighted room. You didn’t let anybody blow even a single candle off because the thought of being in the dark, made your skin crawl.

The only thing which weirdly seem to comfort you were the sheets. The spicy, sweet scent lingering in them filling your nose till it helped your body to relax. You tried to ignore the fact that the sheets smelled like him. It is only because he is powerful enough to protect you, his scent wrapped around you like an embrace you still desperately need. Protect you? He even said himself that he failed to do that…Someone really tried to — or maybe at least considered to kill you. You…such a bizarre, scary, yet now true and realistic thing. And it is because of him, the man who still scares you.

You can’t really choose sides because you can see who the real enemy is. You can’t keep telling yourself that he is the one who is going to hurt you. You have to believe that he wouldn’t do that, turn into his instincts and just sucking you dry of your life. Maybe he is just a normal man trapped in his own body…

There is probably no way of going out of this now, you fear you don’t have any other choice. You just want to close your eyes and wake up. Wake up from this nightmare. You hate how you have no idea what do to. You, till now had all the control over your life as it was simple and you were basically the only person in it. You, now have to rely on him, trust him to protect you. Trust him that he will not change his mind with you.

You can’t stand a second alone anymore. The creaks of the old wood made you jump every time, your skin around your nails was already raw from your picking and you could feel the lump in your throat slowly suffocating you. You don’t want to be alone anymore, even if it means that he would be the one to safe you from this prison. You just need a small walk and not think about anything. Maybe find something to eat, since you still haven’t eaten anything, even if the thought of food made you sick to your stomach.

You clinched onto the silky skirt of your nightgown, not even caring about the cold floor under your feet. Your skin was clean but the memory still lingered as well as also the metallic smell under your nose. The black fabric trailed behind you as you make your way out of the bedroom. You simply picked the silky, long, black nightgown because it didn’t remind of that one stained in sin.

This side of the mansion was unusually cold. You wondered if it is because of the death living in these walls. Everything however other than the cold, seemed more used and alive. There were roses at every piece of furniture, the carpet which you were standing on, had in some places its color faded and even the wooden floors were scratched, probably from shoes. It all shined with such light, you haven’t seen before.

You walked further and further, till you had to turn around to look at the end of the hallway to a door. It seemed to call to you, maybe that is were he was hiding but as you reached the railing of the big staircase, you were proven otherwise.

Your hand wrapped around the polished wood of the staircase when you felt it. Him, his presence stabbing you into your back. “Where are you going?” You gasp, turning swiftly, with your eyes wide.

Maybe he should stop doing that. Maybe his quiet movements and talent to always creep up on you, just comes with his nature but you probably will never get used to it. His sudden appearance made goosebumps rise all over your body, looking at him with your lips parted. He looked in some way different...His hair was tussled, eyes piercing and weirdly wide as he stared down at your body clad in the black nightgown with an unnatural expression who think you have seen before — but you just can’t place it. His lips were red and plump, almost like just bit into a cherry. He looked…yes, different that is the word. “Nowhere…” Is your simply answer as you tighten your grip on the railing, not being able to meet his eyes. Why don’t you say the truth? You are not sneaking out or anything but just this sudden difference in his appearance, made you quiver and lost don’t words.

He looks disappointed at your lack of answer. He licks his lips when he took a step closer to you and you couldn’t help but to follow that movement. Was it the smell of him from the sheets still lingering on you or was it coming from him? It burns your nose in an awfully pleasant way, your head almost starts to hurt from it. It wrapped around you, just the way you need, but he didn’t seem to notice your disorientation that much as he himself seems to be quite lost.

“I told you to stay in my bedroom.”

You frown at that. There’s no reason for you to be in his room the whole time, seeing that you are still being watched and he only just proved your point by showing up. Like he said, you’re safe now, at least from the person who did that horrible thing. In fact, you'd rather be doing something other than lying in bed, just wondering. Sometimes being alone with your thoughts is a lot. Finally you want to do something in this still unfamiliar place. For once, you want to do something to keep your mind occupied, so you wouldn’t again drown in your own thoughts and secondly you just don’t think it is that big of a deal that you’re outside his bedroom. There are probably many people looking after you and you’re thankful for that but he seems like he doesn’t trust them, you — to take care of yourself. Maybe you’re a human but you still have free will in this house.

“Till what?” You say, back leaning on the staircase. “I just want something to eat.” You trail off, almost like a little kind after being scolded.

“And I told you to call me if you need something–“

“I can still walk and do things myself…I’m fine.” You, so badly wanted to roll your eyes and maybe not really in annoyance. He came again closer to you and you almost shiver at the smell radiating from him. Why is it so addicting? What is he doing to you?

His stops right in front of you, making you look up into his glaring eyes. Even if his build was quite thin, he radiated power that made you want to curl up into a ball. “You’re taking all of this too lightly.” Hyunjin leans over you, your eyes completely captivated by his and the red hue they held.

“And you too…” You don’t want to say that you got lost in his eyes. Also you don’t know how to feel about someone like him being so concerned about your well being but you think he is just a little exaggerating. It happened to you, not him. You really should feel more scared and you think you even do but all of your fright seem to vanish when he is present. Again, is it only because you know him well enough now that you know, he won’t hurt you or is it only because there is someone showing you who the real danger is? Do you really trust him? Maybe but you do not trust these feelings you are starting to feel when you are with him. When he is away, you always think of him differently than when he is with you…you’re totally screwed.

Hyunjin looks you over, listening closely to your heart. It was steady, you were too calm for his liking. Just few hours ago, you were shaking and now you’re almost completely calm. “You are telling me that this doesn’t concern you?” He questioned you, trying to search in your eyes for answers as they were completely unmoving from his. “Well, it certainly does concern me.”

“That’s good for you.” Comes out of your mouth, wishing silently to not be having this conversation any longer. You suddenly feel embarrassed as you realize how you are acting. The sweet smell turned sorrow the more his frown deepened and also your own expression. Why are you acting like this? You’re a grown woman and you shouldn’t be acting like this. You don’t know if he truly noticed what you were doing but you wished for the ground to swallow you whole.

With a shaky inhale you turn your body to possibly go around him but he saw your move of getting away from him miles away. His arm blocked your way, hand grabbing the railing so close to yours, you again almost shivered as his other also caged you in. You can’t look at him now. You knew you would only embarrassed yourself further. Could he sense your desperation? Maybe this thing — the smell was playing with your head or made you do feel this way about him but you were certain that if you would look at him, you would lost the silent battle between you two.

“Just let me go.” You say, voice soft and quiet but he could hear you clearly as well as your pounding heart.

Your head is leveled with his upper chest but your eyes are set on his hand next you, gripping the railing so tightly, like he is holding the last bit of his sanity left in him. It is only to ignore his breath fanning over you but you just become more aware of his close presence. You could feel his cold breath moving your hair as he leans over your frozen body. “No.”

Your eyes look into his direction, stopping at his chest softly raising and falling and his alabaster skin, peaking out of his slightly unbuttoned shirt. “Let me go, Hyunjin.” You are now pleading because you really do feel like fainting from this rollercoaster of emotions, you’re now experiencing.

Your words may have meant a little more than either of you would like to admit. He looks down at you with such softness that he is only confident in when you are not fully seeing it. “How can you? How can you be so calm? Are you not scared that somebody tried to hurt you?” He says, hair around your forehead being swept away from his breath.

You finally look at him, pointedly. “It is not like it would be the the first time…”

Were you only this mean to see what he would do? See how much it would take for him to see that maybe you’re not the right person for him. Everything that happened was only because of someone else. And he in fact finally sees you, even more than you thought he would as he steps away from you with his eyes flashing with anger. Or maybe he is just seeing what you've been trying to achieve all along. Trying to throw away any responsibility as your form of self protection. Because your life gave you everyday the same things and when finally something new happens to you, you are too scared to do anything about it.

Maybe you were being too harsh with your words as you look upon him. As soon as he backed away from you, he comes even closer. Way closer. You become wide eyed from how fast, he pinned you up against the railing. “Listen to me, you will stay in your room till I say otherwise, I can’t compel you but I sure will convince you.” The stairs digged painfully into your back and not from you trying to get away from him, he is actually the one pressing you into it.

You breathe out as you can feel your chests up against each other and you flush at the feeling more as you realized there weren’t that many layers separating you. “You c-can’t…” You can’t talk properly as he is basically suffocating you.

He tilts his head a little at your words. “Can’t what?” Hyunjin repeats, tilting his head down at your level to maybe catch your eye fully. “You’re really testing my patience, love. I don’t want to be like this…I don’t want to make you fear me but you’re so…insufferable.”

Please, stop saying that. You do know how you are acting and that it is bad. No person deserves this and you do know what it feels like. You are becoming the very person you hate. “Hyunjin….I am so sorry — I am just so scared.” You’re scared of everything. Manly from these feelings bubbling inside your chest, not even the person that wants to hurt you, scares you more. You promise yourself to not feel this emotions again, it just never works out in your favor. You glance at him, eyes filled with sorrow that his own seemed to completely mimic. “I just don’t want to think about all of this. Everything is still so new and now this?” You look around, hating yourself for the burning in your eyes. “I don’t know what to do anymore…what to feel anymore —”

His hand travels from the railing closer to your own, tips of his fingers touching your burning skin. You look down at his hand, lingering again so close to yours before looking up at him with big eyes. “Then let me…let me be you, I will protect you but you just have to let me in….” He says, whispering those words to you.

Your heart flutters at his words. Does he really mean it? If yes, would you even be able to give in fully? You can’t say that you don’t want to. His eyes look into yours with such softness, you wondered if those are really the same eyes you saw the first night you two met. You could see him, through those red irises you saw someone. His true self. He also could see the small girl peaking from behind the beautiful color of your eyes, a small girl who searched her whole life for a purpose and love. He wants to think he is what you have been searching for. He enjoys these moments of complete silence. Your voice is so warm and soothing but sometimes these silent moments gave more than words. Hyunjin could look at you freely. From your eyebrows to your eyes that showed him wrinkles of smiles and tears they have been through, to your nose that you sometimes like to stick somewhere you shouldn’t and then your lips. You do notice that.

You let him, as you are also letting your own eyes fall onto his own but the usual admiration you had for them vanished. From the conversation you had before you didn’t notice the small smudge of red at the corner of his mouth. You knew what it was, you knew what he was, so this should be normal, even for you but you today find yourself absolutely dispising this color. You turn your head away from him and he at the loosen his grip on the railing.

You don’t want to think about what happened, you don’t meet his lingering stare. You knew it would only give away your feelings for him, you wouldn’t be able to hide them. He steps away from you, still however keeping close to you but you could atleast breathe now. You look up at him then after few moments of just trying to calm yourself down, eyes falling immediately on the same spot as before, at his lips.

“What do you want to eat?”

“Huh?” You let out dumbly, momentarily looking at his eyes which held a teasing flicker. “–something?”

His lips curl up at one corner, exactly the one where the smear is. “Well, you will have to tell me more if you want something, angel.”

Can he stop with these nicknames already? Nobody called you that before and it made an unfamiliar feeling rise in your chest. You could feel your face burning and you knew he could tell. You frown at that, embarrassed. “Stop it” You mumbled to yourself but it was in some way mainly meant for him and you don’t immediately realize he could still hear you.

“Stop what?” He asks, confused but you knew with the look on his face that he is teasing you.

You sigh. “Nothing…” Playing along and to safe yourself from further embarrassment, you start to play with the skirt of your nightgown. “…whatever there is available.”

You starts again fidgeting in his presence but this was totally normal now it seams. You really do become aware of how much you can’t speak freely to new people, so used to the small circle you had. Oh, how you missed them but you do think that if Mia knew at least with who you’re spending your time with, she would be absolutely delighted for you. You dream about having at least enough confidence to speak without any fear of how the others would perceive you but on the other hand, you really didn’t think twice before talking. Like now.

His lips which had your full attention parted to maybe again say something teasing in his sultry voice of his but your thoughts were already flying from your mouth before he could even get a sound out. “Why is there blood on your mouth?”

There is silence after that, watching how the warmness in his eyes slightly dimmed. You’re always asking such questions — you do know why. It was just a small thought that you should have kept to yourself. He looked at you with a small pointed look, not knowing how to answer because it was so obvious. Yes, it truly was. However your mind sometimes likes to blur the fact that he really feeds from blood and blood only. Such a fairytale — perhaps nightmare he is, you still can’t wrap your head around it.

His eyes linger on yours while he swipes the blood from his lips with his thumb, his movements little too slow to not be intentional. The fact he then wraps his plump lips around the digit is definitely on purpose. Your own parted into a silent gasp, feeling your heart, hammering against your chest from his actions.

You think that maybe he was a going to say something again or take a challenging step closer to you but your little moment was interrupted by a set of quick footsteps with heavy breathing. You both turn to your left to see a young woman, coming from the hallway, stopping for a second as she jumps at your appearance. Your eyes travel from her scared eyes to her clothes, giving you a clue that she is one of the maids in this home but you definitely couldn’t look away from the blood coating her hand which was pressed into her neck.

Your heart broke a little as you connected the dots, flickering your gaze to Hyunjin. The woman thankfully didn’t stay for too long as she quickly disappeared from your sight. You do still look into her direction because you can’t look at him again. Maybe you are just exaggerating but to you this is a big deal. You don’t know if feeding from someone means anything to them — him but to you it does. Piercing someone’s skin with your teeth to drink blood which was your source of pleasure…It is no one of your business if he is with other women — or is it?

You could feel your face unwillingly scrunch up into a frown, you can’t hide that you are upset and somehow disgusted by this anymore. Hyunjin stiffened, the thick silence even for him too much to bare, tilting his head to meet your eyes and maybe make you see how sorry he truly is for you to see him like this, again. However you simply turn away more from him. Somehow he understands your reaction but he is not so sure why you would take it so deeply. It is a normal thing for him. He needs to feed after all, just under these different circumstances.

He calls out to you but you ignore him, pressing your lips into a thin line to appear, somewhat not too affected. Your lack of reaction makes him feel small — thinking carefully about the right words, so as not to make you even more upset or scare you more away from him. If you’re taking this so seriously so shall he. He didn’t even think twice about such thing but he has to keep in mind that you’re still new to this. “You must understand that I have to feed.” He says, sighing at your frown that you are trying to make as little as possible. “It means nothing—“

You look up, puzzled little with yourself. One side is telling you that this is alright and nothing is wrong with it but your other side is telling you the complete opposite. He wishes to be with you but does something like this? Something so intimate? You feel your own skin tingling at the thought of his teeth piercing your own very skin. Jealousy strikes you in the back of your head, showing you exactly why you so despised this. You don’t know for sure, if you want to be the one to give him blood but you for sure don’t like anyone else doing it. Is it so normalized to bite someone into their most sensitive places and drink from them? He looks unsure of what to do next as you only look at his face with emotionless expression but like he said — your eyes always gave you away.

“If you want this to work…I want you to stop feeding — atleast like this.” Maybe you don’t mind him feeding from someone but just not there…that only should be for you only. “It maybe doesn’t mean anything to you but it does to me. I know, I shouldn’t be asking you this, how to feed but to me it feels…intimate.” And erotic, you wanted to say but even this simply word, was somehow hard enough to get out of your mouth under his watchful eyes. Hyunjin stays silent a little more and not like you, he seems to think over his words.

“Alright…” He answered you, before his face falls so quickly into a frown that you almost missed it, but it wasn’t from your disagreement with his diet. It was simply because of the way you sounded out the words. “–are you saying, you want me to feed off you only?”

You should’ve known better, of course he just asked you that as it wasn’t already so obvious from your confession. Your hand flies to your chest, pressing your palm slightly where your heart starts to beat a little faster, your eyes big and eyebrows furrowed. “I-I…don’t know.” It really is quite a unique question to be asked, but you do ignore the fact that you already know the answer.

He blinks at your weak tone, a small smile tugging at his lips. “You say that a lot, but I know, you do know, Y/N…” He said, waiting a little before continuing, maybe to see if you would say something more, but you only look at him through your pretty lashes. He sighs at your expression, before tilting his head down. “I will stop feeding in the sense of biting.” You meant that you don’t want him to bite someone in their neck, but you are pleasantly surprised by his answer, so you stay quiet. “Now, I’ll bring you something to eat, it will be waiting for on the table outside of our room.” You shutter embarrassingly at that one specific word, coughing, to mask your shocked reaction. He didn’t make a move that indicated that he just heard your embarrassing noise of shock, but in his head he was smiling big. You thought that this conversation would still go on but you’re happy with how it ended. At least you’re not fully at each other’s throats. Huh, funny…

You are now the one with your lips left apart, words swirling in your head as he passed by you, his hand grazing so close to yours which was placed on the corner of the railing when he started to ascend down the stairs. Your nose is yet again, hit with his smell, wrapping around you like a duvet of the embrace you so needed. Watching him walk away from you, though didn’t feel like the other times and only after he disappeared from your line of sight, you walked back to yours and his bedroom.

────

It is been a long day, such a long day for you to just again drown in your thoughts. You didn’t leave the room for the rest of the day, simply spending your time on one of the couches, reading. The words however as the day slowly turned into night started to blur. From your exhaustion and also from the realization of the situation that will soon have to be dealt with. You look at the bed with a blank expression, because there couldn’t be a face for you to express with all the emotions you were experiencing.

As the sun set, you finally decided to open the heavy curtains, blocking, till now, your view of the outside. You could have opened them sooner, but you didn't want to risk him getting caught in the sunlight — however, he didn’t come. You looked out the window, till you saw the sun disappear and the moon appear. Every day that passed by was so slow to you, but by that time the nature had time to bloom into its beauty. Everything started to get greener, more vivid — was the earth always this colorful? The warm, orange light tickle your skin that you almost felt like one of those creatures as because you got so used to the darkness. But you did start to see its own beauty — Hyunjin came late that night as expected and sleep didn’t creep up on you, till he arrived. Perhaps you were concern, but you don’t want to say that…

You were already in bed, body tucked under the heavy duvet and eyes closed, but you could tell that he knew, you were awake. He just simply chose to not say anything, maybe not to disturb you in your peaceful state, but inside you were shaking. He went to the bathroom and at that you were again thinking about how you two will share the same bed…

You have never shared a bed with a man before, even like this — you haven’t even been to a man’s bedroom till now! Was it fright that made your heart beat so fast? You know, he wouldn’t do anything to you, but still….or maybe you were just nervous. And not in a bad way it seemed. Your fingers gripped onto the bed as the every passing second, he spend more in the bedroom, became even more unbearable for you.

You waited for him to come back. A long time at that and you didn’t have a single clue that his long stay in the bathroom, was simply because he was nervous too. He, spend his time simply looking at himself in the mirror, thinking about how to calm himself down. Who would have thought that he could even feel such an emotion? To him, the time that he spend inside the bathroom wasn’t long enough for him to find the right courage to come back into the room, but it was long enough for him to think back to the moment you two shared.

Drinking blood from someone, became for him a daily thing, a normal thing, like for you to drink and eat. Till you said that — was he always this blind? He never thought of drinking from someone this way, but he knew of course that for humans it was different. He did feel the pleasure, but for humans it was out of this world almost, but you didn’t know that…You only said that it seemed intimate and he is thankful that you don’t know the whole truth about how a vampire bite feels for a human…What were you doing to him? It is been a long time since he second guessed himself like that. He became more careful with his moves, since you arrived, but he can’t lie that he still is a little reckless sometimes and just does what his heart desires and acts on his instincts.

Time flew past quickly, yet so slowly, but you couldn’t fight the hazy state you are falling into any longer. Your eyes closed a long time ago, but now the deep frown on your face started to soften. You felt your body falling, melting almost into the sheets and your mind became so quiet and peaceful that you didn’t have the power to acknowledge the silent creek of the bathroom door.

His slow footsteps blend in with your heartbeat in your ear. The old floor creaking under his weight, was the only thing giving him away. You hear the last creak stop next to the bed, hair on the back of your neck standing up at that. You could feel his stare on the back of your head that peaked out of the soft duvet. Being so sleepy, you didn’t feel your heart pounding that much, but you do wait anxiously for his next move, eyes wide set on his silhouette dancing in the candle light on the wall,

You feel cold air of the room piercing your back as the duvet is slightly lifted off you. You realize at that you basically stole almost all of it and in some way, it made you embarrassed simply because it were his own sheets — and also your nose unconsciously kept digging into them, filling your lungs with his smell. You don’t feel much bad because you knew he didn’t need anything to cover himself with. You wanted to give him more of it, but you only found yourself completely frozen as your whole senses heightened when you feel a dip in the bed.

The bed was big, but soft enough to feel how his whole body fell into it. When the only source of light is then blown away, you became highly aware of the body laying behind you. Was he watching you? Probably, like he always did. Your heart jumped a little as he rolled his body over and you just knew that he was facing your back.

His blue eyes watched your body and other than the small rising of your body when taking a breath, you were completely unmoving. He played with the edge of the duvet, that didn’t even cover a little of him. Pulling up the duvet, was a request for you to at least give him some, but as you didn’t even move an inch, he chose to sacrifice a night without it.

Few moments passed by and again you became sleepy, snuggling into the bed and missing another subtle shift of the body behind you. You don’t even feel him, leaning his upper body over yours. You don’t even feel the cold breath on your cheeks nor the cold radiating so close behind you.

He leaned over you, left hand keeping his upper body from falling onto yours. His other twitched in the air, just hovering over the length of your waist. He for a second couldn’t help but stare at your blissful state. From your red cheeks bitten by the cold, smushing almost together from your face being so snuggled into the pillow to your eyelashes fanning over your cheekbones, to your ruffled hair, creating a halo around you, till again his eyes fell onto your lips. They were puckered slightly, flushed just as your cheeks. You looked absolutely ethereal. He must say, he has seen you sleep before, but not from this angle nor this close. It was like seeing you from a complete different perspective — view of a lover, he wished to say.

But then, your so called blissful state was interrupted when you felt it — when you felt the weight of his arm around you, tugging you into him. Your eyes shoot open, heart almost jumping out of your chest, but you don’t immediately move away. You savor the feeling of him hugging you, the feeling of his body flush against yours. But as the coldness of his skin started to seep through the layers of clothes, duvet and then piercing through the warmth into you, you move away from him.

He didn’t hold you tightly nor forcefully as you jump to the edge of the bed quite easily. “I am sorry, I can’t…” You croaked, quietly into the darkness.

His head hanged low, already hating himself more from doing that, making you uncomfortable and just doing something without your permission. His nails teared through the material of the sheets as his eyes fell onto your still not turned body. “I understand.” He whispered back. He really does, but he thought that maybe, you could at least let him touch you like this, to just hold you. “I will sleep somewhere else.”

You only nod a little, eyes still looking into the darkness before you. As he got out of the bed, the coldness left with him and you realize that it truly was completely different from the one in the room. You listen closely to his footsteps, before you hear a muffled huff as he fell probably onto the couch. You feel bad for him to be the one to leave his own bed, but there probably wouldn’t be even a room for you to talk otherwise. You lay back down fully after a minute, his presence still known to you and at that sense of calmness washedover you.

His eyes reflected in the dark as he watched you again from afar. He saw how your breaths after a moment became even, body completely sinking into his bed. Closing his own eyes, the soft thuds of your heart, filled his ears. And that melody accompanied by the pictures of every moment today with you kept his mind occupied, till he felt his own need of sleep come over him. At least he has something to dream about now.

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amara-among-the-stars · 2 days

Text

Messing around with some Swiss/Mountain thoughts and re wrote a little fic blurb I had written ages ago (and deleted). Enjoy I guess?

Swiss was growing upset with himself. He had been trying to make Mountain a gift for the past two hours and nothing was going the way he wanted it to go. Sighing he picked up the silly drawing and letter along with a bracelet and was about to toss em in the bin when he smelt patchouli and sage and felt arms wrap around him. He jumped and quickly covered the drawing, and the letter and the bracelet Dew helped him make.

“Whatya doin’ Starfire?” Mountain whispered, pressing a chaste kiss to Swiss’ temple.

“Mmm nothin’. T-Thought you were in the greenhouse with Rora and Rainy.” Swiss stuttered out, leaning back against Mountain. Said ghoul let out a small rumble as Mountain pressed a kiss to Swiss’ cheek before speaking.

“Was. But we finished what we were doin’ and I wanted to see my Honeybee.” Mountain drawled, nuzzling and nipping at Swiss’ neck.

Sathanas. His southern accent was thicker than usual. Squirming he let out a small upset whine, causing Mountain to stop what he was doing, thinking he had somehow hurt the multi ghoul.

“Alright there Sugar?” Mountain asked, pulling away. Swiss took a deep breath in, slowly letting it out, tears threatening to fall down his face.

“I.. I um..” He whispered. Mountain let out a confused trill, moving Swiss’ chair so he could kneel by Swiss’ legs.

“What’s goin on in that pretty lil head of yours Darlin’?” Mountain questioned. Swiss let out a choked sob and pushed the gifts he was working on off his desk and onto Mountain’s lap.

“M’ sorry if they’re bad. Just.. wanted to earn your affection.” Swiss muttered, looking down at his hands. Mountain looked at the drawing, it was of Mountain laying on his back amongst flowers, dressed in some old western styled clothing with a piece of straw in his mouth and a bunch of different little animals like squirrels, bunnies and coyotes laying beside him and what seemed to be a silver dapple pinto horse. Mountain grinned, before moving onto the letter to read it. The letter consisted of Swiss naming off all the things he loved about Mountain, now purring, he picked up the bracelet, eyeing it. It was gold. The charm was a cowboy hat with sunflowers and on the back engraved was the name Honeybee.

“Oh my darlin Honeybee. You don’t need to earn my affection. Not now. Not ever.” Mountain started to say. Swiss let out a pained whine and started crying.

“Please.. let me.. Let me try to be good. I can be good. I promise.” Swiss crackled out. Mountain shushed him gently.

“I wasn’t finished Sugar. You dont ever have to earn it, because it will always be yours to have.

I love you Honeybee.” Mountain stated, grabbing Swiss and pulling him off the chair and onto the lap.

“Come. Stop those tears Bee. I don’t like seein’ ya cry.” Mountain cooed, pressing soft small kisses to Swiss’ face before pulling him into a gentle kiss.

“T-Thank you Mo. I.. I love you too.” Swiss stumbled out, purring and burying his head in Mountain’s chest. The pair sat like that for what seemed like an hour before Mountain got up, carrying his partner to their bed and laying them down.

Mountain went on to describing what he loves about Swiss. Just to make sure the Multi ghoul knew just how much Mountain loves him.

"I love your cheesy smile. The way your eyes crinkle as you laugh loudly. I love your singing. I love your hugs. I love the way you scrunch your nose when you smell something you're not used to smelling. I love how you love our entire pack. And most of all. I'll love you forever." Mountain whispered as he peppered kisses all over Swiss’ face, smiling as the multi ghoul went lax in his arms and returned the favor.

“I'll love you forever as well.” Swiss replied, nuzzling against Mountain’s chest. As the night settled they nestled together in a tangle of limbs. The moonlight filtered through the curtains, casting a silvery glow over the room. Mountain, with Swiss cradled in his arms, closed his eyes and felt a sense of contentment wash over him. Both could feel the thrum of feeling safe and sheltered within the embrace of each other’s arms and within their shared bond.

#amara writes #the band ghost #swiss ghoul #mountain ghoul #swissalps #the nameless ghouls #the band ghost fanfiction #nameless ghouls

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fairymagicandendlesswonder · 2 days

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Good manners are very important to me, so as a rule I'd be disinclined to like someone like Beorn at first. He has a very blunt, abrupt manner. Tolkien said he was "never very polite," and Gandalf said, "He can be appalling when he is angry, though he is kind enough when humoured."

But several things would have changed my opinion very quickly, the main one being the way his animals love him. As far as I'm concerned, you can tell a LOT about a person by how they treat animals. It's said in the book that he loves his animals as his children, and you can see how much they trust him. That outweighs any abruptness of manner.

Additionally, I appreciate his honesty in speaking his mind; his selectiveness of company; his independence; and the way he's a friend to decent people and a fierce enemy to evil ones.

"What did you do with the goblin and the Warg?" asked Bilbo suddenly.

"Come and see!" said Beorn, and they followed round the house. A goblin's head was stuck outside the gate and a warg-skin was nailed to a tree just beyond. Beorn was a fierce enemy. But now he was their friend, and Gandalf thought it wise to tell him their whole story and the reason of their journey, so that they could get the most help he could offer."

Once Beorn found out that Gandalf's story was true and that they killed the Great Goblin, he was very friendly and hospitable to their company and did all he could for them, even letting them ride his ponies hundreds of miles away to the edge of Mirkwood; which was no small thing, considering how much he loves his animals.

"You do not guess what kindness he has shown you in letting dwarves ride them so far and so fast." -Gandalf

Every time I read through The Hobbit or LOTR again, I'm inspired and reminded of all that is beautiful, true and important. Being noble doesn't always equate with having perfectly polished manners or sweetness of tone, and it's important not overlook goodness in favor of more superficial charms. "All that is gold does not glitter," after all.

I'd be honored to have a friend like Beorn.

#the hobbit #the hobbit bilbo #bilbo baggins #lotr #lotr quotes #lotr books #beorn #thorin oakenshield #fili and kili #tolkien dwarves #tolkien elves #tolkien #tolkien books #lord of the rings #middle earth #mirkwood #thranduil

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some-pers0n · 3 days

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Memoir of an Albatross

Chapter 4 - Have Mercy on a Wounded Bird

[1] [2] [3] [4]

(Art by Loquatic)

Chapter Description: Queen Lagoon is throwing a party, much to Albatross's displeasure. However, it is only then when it is revealed that Lagoon has certain plans for his brother's future.

Five years had since passed Queen Lagoon's rise to power, and yet Albatross still had not felt any more respected the day since he hatched. If anything, he felt as though this newer attention was more fabricated and soulless.

These days, he would receive praise and admiration for his magic. Any dragons who stopped by for the queen would bow their heads to him. They'd call him "Albatross the Animus Prince", as though him having these powers and being of royal blood was something other than a curse he begrudgingly accepted. They talked about how powerful he was. They spoke of him as this glorious dragon.

He knew what they thought though. He knew that they thought he was just as deplorable and horrific as when he was a hatchling. They just now had to be nice since he's capable of harm. They know what animus dragons can do, even without being aware of what he's done to Sapphire and Queen Gannet. In some ways, it felt no different than being politely ignored and glossed over; just that now he had to stand around with dragons.

Yet, life could be worse. Could be better though. For as many edits and changes as Lagoon's reign had brought with it, Albatross's internal life remained the same. For one, Sapphire had not returned. Lagoon had visited with her several times, all of which she came back with the same news: Sapphire had not forgiven him. She hated him with all of her fragmented mind. She did not want to return as long as he was still alive.

He couldn't blame her. Who would forgive a dragon like him? A dragon who had been so easily influenced by his darker thoughts and gave way to the temptation of violence and destruction. He was but an animal compared to the rest of them.

At least that's what Lagoon implied from her lectures. She would go on and on these days about how she needed his magic. That his magic was a dangerous force bestowed onto him by the moons themselves or whatever spiritual belief she held. He only saw them as a sick joke, one that only Lagoon found funny.

He had been her glorified circus freak for her to parade around at parties. There had been many since her uprising, and while they did certainly bring more diplomatic leaders and open trade routes and better relations with the surrounding kingdoms, Albatross found them a waste of time. Had he been able to skip them, he would have found some joy.

Yet, his home, the Island Palace, was used as her party area. It was the one thing he wanted, his own place away from Lagoon, and even then she abused it as her party palace. His emotions became secondary, as she would drop by and announce to him that she was hosting some new event between her and whatever queen this time. How wonderful. Even better with her parading him around like an object to ogle at.

He felt more alone and isolated at those parties than ever before. He had to put up a charming, nice exterior, even if all he wanted to do was just retreat into his quarters and wait until all the guests were gone. Play nice. He didn't hate the dragons he saw, not at all, but rather felt as though they were never genuine. Playing up a nice, friendly facade like he was.

He was tired of it all. He wanted to be alone, forever.

"Albatross?" a voice called for him.

"Hm? Yes?"

"You've been standing near the fruit and juice area for a while. Are you alright?" The dragon tilted his head to the side.

It was Humpback, Lagoon's husband and King of the SeaWings. Better yet, a brother-in-law. He was nice enough; certainly a lot better than Lagoon, that's for sure. He was an upper-class noble, one that Lagoon took an interest in. He tended to ramble about his life back then, but anything he said was infinitely more preferable to being around Lagoon. He at the very least cared about him a little.

"Yeah, I'm just a little tuckered from the chit-chat," he laughed. "Standing by here, sipping this...juice." He took a sniff from his chalice. "Mango and pineapple blend, right? Though, I'm also getting a hint of lime too."

"Couldn't tell you, honestly. All I know is that the guests love it." He grinned, checking Albatross in the side playfully. "Why don't you come on out later? When you've mentally recovered a bit. It's not like this is some big diplomatic meeting anyway. Just a bunch of dragons."

He looked around. They were in the central room, one that was connected to the rest of the halls and areas. Water flowed through river-like paths on the floor, just barely deep enough to go up to his talons. Tables were set up along the sides, carrying rows upon rows of meat, fruit, and drink. SeaWings of all shapes and colours were dotted all around, chatting with one another. Some on the floor, some on the balcony. All of them nobles from various houses, coming together for some grand reason that only Lagoon seemed to know.

In the center-most part of the palace was Lagoon herself, her voice somewhat audible to Albatross even amongst the deafening sounds of dragons laughing and talking. She was with some SeaWing noble he had never seen before, showing them the statue. She blabbed about its marbling and how beautiful it was. The same inane mumblings he had heard a dozen times over.

Then, Lagoon looked at Albatross. Even across the room, her eyes were piercing. He knew she wanted him over. To have him there as some symbol of the power she has. For him to be this performing animal.

"Oh, that's her." Humpback clicked his tongue. "Might wanna get over there before she starts nagging in your ear about it." He snickered. "Geez, I can't blame you for sticking your distance if you had to grow up with her."

"That's an...odd thing to say about your wife," he said.

"What? Joking about her being a bit of a you-know-what? I mean, it's just pointing out the obvious."

"Well, you would be right. She can be a real pain in the tail..." He grumbled. "I don't know though." He shook his head. "I find it somewhat strange to sort of make fun of her."

"Oh c'mon! She yells at you all the time, and you're defending her from a lil' comment. Besides, you'll understand once you're married." Humpback nudged him. "Speaking of which, any plans for that?"

Albatross bit his tongue. Admittedly, no, he had not been thinking about getting married. The thought didn't even cross his mind. He knew it had to happen sometime, all dragons in this family eventually have to settle with somebody, but he didn't feel anything. No real pull or desire to rest with another. Whenever he imagined his future, he saw himself happily alone.

"Honestly? I've got nothing for plans." He shrugged. "I don't really think I'll settle for a while."

"Ahh, wanna stick with the bachelor life? Trust me, it was great. But, y'know, the time comes. Plus it's somewhat hard to pass up becoming royalty when the SeaWing Queen herself comes and drags you along to be her husband. Drags you away from that great ol' life, but, hey, this gig ain't that bad either. Just miss the freedom of doing whatever I wanted without coming back to see somebody scream about how reckless it was. Constantly on your case about the smallest things. Annoying, really."

Albatross blinked. "Is that really how you feel about Lagoon?" he asked, barely masking his disbelief. Is that really how a dragon is supposed to feel about their partner?

Humpback paused to sip his drink. He laughed. "Like I said, Albatross, you'll understand one day."

Albatross awkwardly laughed. "Haha, yeah..." He swirled the drink in his talons. What felt more uncomfortable than Humpback's comments was still the idea of settling with another. It was strange more so the fact he couldn't place a claw on why he felt that way. Maybe it was from him being young, but even so, he was eleven years old. Somewhat exiting his young adult years.

Maybe it was time for him to find somebody to spend the rest of his life with. Yet, the very thought of that made his scales itch. Why?

"Hey!" Another voice squawked in his ear. It was sharp and made him jump.

"Moons above– Lagoon?"

"Yes, it's Lagoon. I was trying to call you over for ages, and you just ignored me." Her scales were lit ever so slightly and her ears were pink from embarrassment. "Come. You're better off entertaining some lovely guests instead of standing there."

"Why should I?"

"They're bored and want to have a little chat with you. They think I'm an idiot.They think I can't even get my stubborn brother to do what I say."

"I doubt that somehow."

"Just come over. Stop being a grouch. Loosen up a little!" she said. From behind, Albatross could make out the faint sound of Humpback snorting.

She grabbed him by the talons. "Get over here." She began dragging him along. "You're like a hatchling. Can't you listen to me for once in your life?"

He pulled his talons away. "You don't have to treat me like that," he said, a little harsher than he'd like. "I can walk on my own." He glanced back at Humpback. "Nice getting to talk with you."

"No problem! Besides, now I can eat all the scavenger sashimi I want." He grabbed one of the delicacies in question, plopping it into his mouth. "Good idea sticking around here. Maybe I'll stay and eat all the snacks too."

"No, dear, you'll have to be with me soon enough. King business."

"Aw..." He looked at her with the eyes of a baby turtle. Sad, vaguely pathetic, yet somewhat cute.

Albatross let out a small, bemused chuckle. He then turned back to Lagoon, trailing behind her. "What do you want with me To have me explain how I made that statue of you again?"

"No, actually. Besides, I only made you do that twice."

"Twice more than I should have."

"You just can't help yourself but complain about everything, huh?" she asked. "I try and make light conversation and include you and all you do is whine and pout." She shook her head. "At least smile this time."

"I always smile. That's what I'm supposed to do at these parties, no?"

"Well, yes, but not that way. The way that shows all of your weird teeth. Fewer teeth, a little less wide. You look like a serial killer that way."

"Thanks Lagoon. You're always the best with compliments."

"Tone down the sarcasm as well. You're always like this at parties. This time it's slightly important. You need to make a nice impression."

Lagoon's face lifted as they approached the SeaWings she had been chatting with earlier. A complete shift in character. "Apologizes for the wait, Prince Albatross simply was helping himself to the buffet. Have you tried any? The best chefs in Pyrrhia have prepared the most delicious platter of seafood a dragon could ask for. Be a shame if it went to waste."

Two SeaWings stood before them. Behind was an imposing marble fountain of Lagoon. Sculpted from marble, it displayed the queen holding a spear above her head. Water flowed from the spouts below her talons, pooling in the basin.

That statue was one of the things Lagoon had asked Albatross to enchant for her. Her old sculptor had fallen ill and Lagoon didn't want to wait until they had gotten better. Instead, she had given him the diagrams and asked him to create it with the bonus of being a fountain as well. He tried to argue back, but she insisted. He complied.

Oddly enough, since that enchantment and many others before, he grew more irritated and sensitive to Lagoon's chatter. Most voices and noises in general were harsher on the ears, but Lagoon's voice in particular stood out as being shrill, especially when she raised her voice. He had chalked it up to getting older, and yet, something didn't feel right about it. Looking at that statue only reminded him of that.

"Oh, thank you, your majesty. We'll be sure to see." One SeaWing, one with sandy yellow scales and cloudy grey eyes, spoke before her husband could get a chance to. "And thank you for bringing Albatross!"

Guests had a habit of crowding and even demanding for Albatross whenever these parties happened. By all means, he is the first-ever SeaWing animus. They'd come and ask him basic questions like how he discovered his magic, to which he gave a fake story about reading a scroll that described it and jokingly tried to see if he had it. Perfectly mundane.

"Yes, yes, Albatross, the grand SeaWing animus," he playfully began. "A little birdie here told me that you two wanted a chance to meet me. Well, today is your lucky day!" He tipped his head lightly. "Whereabouts are you two from?"

The blue-white SeaWing tried to speak once again, only to be cut off by his wife. "We're from the Shifting Sands Grotto. That whole general region."

"Oh? Really?" He tried to mask his mild surprise. The Shifting Sands Grotto wasn't typically a place where Lagoon would invite guests. They were mainly a neglected area on a small island near Maelstrom's Eye. A common area mainly for trade. Not seedy or dangerous by any means, but nothing of note.

Lagoon didn't typically care for commoners. She would make passing remarks about their whininess whenever an advisor would tell her things. Strange that she would act this way to dragons who are, at best, minor nobility. Albatross would've figured she'd laugh in their face. What was she up to?

"I recall visiting there once," Albatross continued. "Very wonderful place. Is it true that the typhoons are as bad as they say?"

"Well, yes, of course. My dragonets always love going out during those storms though." She shook her head. "Reckless. However, our eldest always listened to my pleas. Oh! I'm Perch, and this is my husband, Swordfish. Terribly sorry, I forgot to introduce ourselves."

"Pleased to make your acquaintance." He smiled. Fewer teeth, less wide.

Perch turned towards Lagoon. "So, will you announce it now?"

"Hm, why not? I figure it's about time. We're only putting it off if we wait any longer." Lagoon looked at the wine chalice in her talons.

"What announcement?"

"What announcement?" Perch echoed. She snickered. "Prince Albatross, you're so funny. Modest and humble too."

Before he could get another word out, Lagoon's voice boomed. "Attention guests!" She spoke like a clap of thunder. "Thank you all for coming here on this fine evening! I ask of you to gather around for a very important announcement."

"I'm so happy for you, Prince Albatross." Perch crooned. "But, where is she? Marlin should be here as well. Swordfish, do you know where she is?"

"Dunno. She wandered off. Said she was getting some food." He shrugged.

"Well, she'll hear the news. Oh, she'll be overjoyed."

"I'm sorry, did I miss a memo or something?" Albatross awkwardly laughed. "What is going on?"

Once more, the only answer he received was the voice of his sister. Despite being several paces from her, it was like she was talking directly into his ear. "Thank you, thank you." She thanked the crowd as they all turned to her, shushing themselves. "Tonight is a very special night where we will honour two dragons in this very room right now. This arrangement will lead to prosperity in our kingdom, as we will have further generations with gifts bestowed onto us by the moons themselves."

She glanced back at Albatross. A coy, wicked smirk was painted on her face. "Tonight, I am pleased to announce the engagement between Marlin, daughter of Perch and Swordfish, and Prince Albatross, royal animus my very own brother."

It was as though a tsunami had crashed down on him. Within an instant, his stomach dropped. His eyes widened, becoming little more than dark circles of shock, fear, and horror. A lump formed in his throat. He struggled to find the words. What words could he even say?

Why was she doing this? An arranged marriage?! No. No, no, no. This wasn't right. This wasn't fair. She could order him around and scold him, but to do this? Was she out of her mind? She knew he was hesitant to marry. Why? How?

Between the mass clapping and clamouring, he saw a lone dragon on the other side of the room. Standing next to some boiled snails was a dragon, the same silent horror painted on her face. Her overscales were a deep, rich navy blue. Her webbed spines were long and her barbels dangled. She had yellow streaks and hints in combination with her golden bioluminescent scales. Her eyes, the hue the same as a golden hour over the sea, were still. Trapped in this expression of shock.

That had to be Marlin. His fiancé.

He couldn't hear what Lagoon was blabbing about. It sounded like rogue waves crashing against him, dragging him under the waters. He stared at the dragon in disbelief. She looked just as scared and confused as he was.

He did this. Because of his inability to find a partner of some kind, Lagoon decided to drag things into her own talons. Now he's doomed this dragon to stay with him. That's what he always does anyway. Hurts dragons.

"Pardon me, please." He mumbled. He pushed passed dragons, quelling their remarks by saying that he just needed a moment. He began to shut down, feeling as though he was acting wholly on instinct rather than conscious choices. Back in this dissociative state.

He walked aimlessly through the halls of the Island Palace. His talons clicked against the cold floor. What was he supposed to do? There was no way he could convince Lagoon to call it off. She was stubborn as an orca. His stomach felt more like a bottomless pit. His limbs were heavy. He couldn't think straight. Thoughts crashed into one another. Rigorous self-critique, parroting everything Lagoon ever said. It was a storm of self-hatred and anger.

He managed to find his room. He took a sharp breath the second he entered, gritting his teeth. He could feel tears attempting to form in his eyes. Why was he having such a violent reaction? It was an arranged marriage entirely without his consent or knowledge, but this cut deep in him. A nerve he never knew existed that had been sliced.

He kept pacing back and forth, picking at his webbing. Same old nervous tick, but never to this degree. Why was this happening to him? What had he done for the moons to curse him like this?

Then, from behind him, felt a new presence. He turned, choking back a small sob.

The SeaWing. Marlin. She was in the doorway, her expression more sympathetic and gentle.

"Hey, are you okay?" she asked. The question sounded so absurd (obviously he was not okay), but the way she framed it made him feel slightly more relaxed.

Albatross bit his tongue. "If I'll be perfectly honest: no, not exactly."

"Yeah..." she sighed. "I can't believe any of this is happening. I'm sorry."

There was an odd way in which she spoke. She sounded so genuine. Not in a way like Lagoon being bluntly rude, but like she was trying to talk with him.

"I can leave if you want. It's a lot. For both of us, but you seem to be...well, not too great."

The corners of Albatross's mouth perked up. "Yeah, hah. I'm just..." He placed his talons on his head. "Moons above, what's gotten into me?"

"If it helps, I'd try to focus on something. I get like this sometimes, but one of my younger brothers has it a lot more. Maybe you could focus on the waves."

The only real thing of comfort to him was the thoughts about her. Trying to figure her out. Why was she like this? Why did she talk to him like this? She only just met him. He never knew she existed until a few minutes ago. How could a dragon be so kind despite everything he is? Isn't he the royal animus, harbinger of a new era to the Kingdom of the Sea with his magic?

Why was she normal about him?

"Again, it's okay if I can leave–"

"Please, no," he blurted out. "No, wait. No, you can leave if you want. I don't want to force you to stay if you don't. You've already been more than helpful." He mustered up every ounce of strength to say those words.

Marlin's gaze softened. She took a step forward. "If it makes you feel a little better, I can be here to talk to."

"...why would you want to do that?" he asked.

"Why wouldn't I?"

"Am I not Albatross? You must have heard about what they've said. I mean, look at me." He gestured to himself. "My eyes, my snout, my weird tail, even the way I talk, it's all off. It's different. Most dragons can't stand to be around me that long. Get weirded out."

"Why would they? You seem nice."

"Why would you stay then?"

"Because you seem nice."

He paused. "How could you know that?"

She tapped her talons on the floor. "I've definitely heard about you. I guess even then I thought it was sorta weird how they'd point at you like you're some deity or some blemish on the family. I thought they were overblowing things. That isn't to say I wasn't shocked when I heard I was being shipped off to marry you; and, moons above, it still feels so surreal to me."

She looked at him. "Then I saw you. You had this look that undid every sort of belief I had about you." She shook her head in disbelief. "I don't think I've ever seen a dragon look like that. You weren't some regal, intimidating, fancy-schmancy royal animus. You were just some normal dragon."

She chuckled. "Sounds weird, but I dunno. That's how I felt. I saw you run away and I wanted to help. I don't even really know if this is helping you or not either."

"It's...helping," he muttered. His heart began to slow. He could breathe easier now. "Thank you, Marlin."

"No problem. Helping you actually made me a little calmer. Thank you, uh... Albatross? Are you fine with that?"

"More than fine. Just call me Albatross." He smiled. He didn't care if he showed his teeth and was a bit too wide.

Maybe, out of all of the dragons that Lagoon could have paired him up with, she had picked the one that could perhaps be his friend.

#sp-writing #wof #wings of fire #albatross wof #wings of fire fanfic #wof fanfic #MARLIN MARLIN I LOVE MARLIN MARLINNNNNNNN!!!!

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