#they just feel so. stiff and structured

[altruistic-meme]

do i dare write the post looking at and trying to explain Queen Kristina's behavior? probably. i swear im trying to be less annoying about it but also like. i do what I want.

[fishyfishyfishtimes]

While researching for upcoming fish facts I ended up going down a rabbit hole on parrotfish teeth, and I need to share this information in another form than just a fish fact. This stuff is unbelievable. You know the beak of the parrotfish, right? It's formed from the fused teeth of the parrotfish, as an adaptation to have ample biting surface to scrape off and chew on coral, their main food source.

A close-up of the beak of a parrotfish. It has this honeycomb pattern which I find very cool.

Well. To constantly chew on coral, they must have some pretty hard teeth, right? And they indeed do: the teeth of the parrotfish are made up of a mineral called fluorapatite, which forms intricate, chainmail-like woven structures on a microscopic level. Fluorapatite just so happens to be the second hardest biomineral found. This stuff, the parrotfish's teeth? A square inch of the parrotfish's teeth can withstand a whopping 530 TONS OF PRESSURE!!! That's the weight of 88 ELEPHANTS on top of a single square inch!!!! That's crazy, right!!?? The only biomineral that is tougher is the teeth of chitons, that is the single tougher biological thing in the whole world!!! Not only that, but the stiffness and hardness of the teeth increases the more we get closer to the tip (as the mineral fibers get closer and closer to one another), the very tips of the teeth even surpass the chiton teeth in stiffness!!!

Here are pictures produced through a process called PIC mapping, which shows the size and orientation of crystal fibers at the tip of the teeth.

That feels like it shouldn't be right, no? You'd think that the toughest biominerals in the world would belong to, like, the skull of an animal that rams into rocks or maybe the shell of some animal, not the teeth! The teeth of chitons and parrotfish out of all animals no less! Who would've guessed that the diet of "rock animal" would make the parrotfish require some of the toughest dentition the world has ever seen, huh? That right there is one super good reason why you should never stick your finger in the mouth of one.

Every day I am blown away by how amazing fishes are....

[hybbart]

Day 2506: The world almost ends...

Short story below

The last thing Tango could recall was laying on the ground in a warm pool of his own blood, staring up at a sea of faces gnashing their teeth and claws into his limbs.

And thinking, none of you are Jimmy.

Then everything burned away into darkness.

Yet the world did not end.

It reformed itself a pool of indiscernible reds, an incomplete, deafening whisper, and a biting stench.

A barrier draped itself out over it all. The first shape to ever form, outstretched to block out the colours and sounds and smells. The first feeling accompanied it, something soft and structured, dragging the whole world back down.

And Tango thought for the first time, and he thought, that is Jimmy.

The world was swallowed once more, in its infancy before anything could take form. So, it tried again.

This time it created more than just red. Blacks, blues, greens. Yellow. Tango reached out for it, but had no body with which to do so. Trapped by nothing. There were sounds but they were somewhere else where he wasn’t. Skin he did not have itched and burned. If he could only exist enough to reach, but what little there was soon slipped away. The first, last, and only thing this Tango knew was despair.

So, it tried again.

In this one Tango had a body, he knew, but it was a cage. Cold, stiff, unyielding to him rattling it, begging for freedom. He still couldn’t reach Jimmy, only a shadow in the pool. He screamed, but it made no sound, and he went unseen.

So, it tried again.

Everything burned. Not an inch of his cage went unbitten. If he could he would tear it all off. This time Jimmy heard him, but it did Tango little good. There were too many sounds, too many smells, and they all ripped him apart until there was nothing left.

So, it tried again.

And again, and again, and again.

Until finally the world began to settle into place.

Tango peeled open his eyes, staring up at the clouds, body numb and heavy from the pain. It was like his muscles had turned into snakes biting each other every time he moved, but he could move. He could feel, and think, and hear the nearby sound of bird song.

He tried calling out for Jimmy, voice like shards of glass to his throat and ears. It was good enough. There Jimmy was, leaned over him, blocking out the sun. Though it still burned to do so Tango could feel the weight of a hand on his own. He wished he could assure Jimmy that he was fine.

Jimmy watched him silently. Tango reached out for him again, tears in his eyes. “Jimmy.” He croaked, trying to beckon the avian forward. But he would not move. Tango began to sob. “You’re here. You’re here.”

He opened his mouth. It was as though the whole world went silent to listen. No voice came. Nothing but a sickening crunch. Tango’s vision swam, consumed by Jimmy. Old blood poured from his mouth, drenching Tango below, around the mangled remains of beating flesh. No light filled his eyes, not the bright light of the sun or his own inner sunshine he always carried, or even the black flames consuming his wings. They were as lifeless as the dried mould clinging to his jaw bone and the grey of his cheek.

Tango couldn’t scream.

His own heart wrenched him awake. The rest of him delayed, eyes darting and muscles cramping. Something was squeezing his left arm to death until it was numb. His eyes began to sting from the light piercing right into them. A muffled voice filled the air, and a shadow cast over to block the sun.

“Are you okay?” It asked.

Tango was in too much pain to reply. The shadow stretched out far to canopy the whole sky from view. Wings. They were wings. Tango gasped, trying desperately to call out. “J-”

But his eyes adjusted soon enough, and before him was not feathers made of fall wheat and butter. These were a dusty brown, only golden in the light of the afternoon sun. The eyes that stared down upon him were a piercing sky blue and the shoulders were far too broad. New panic settled within Tango’s bones. Too much of his body hurt to run away.

“Oh, good, you’re awake this time.” He said, voice most certainly not Jimmy’s. His grin was too sharp. “I was starting to think you were just gonna kick the bucket.” The stranger shifted, grabbing something far beyond Tango’s view. “Which would be quite a shame given how much of my supplies you’ve used up.”

Some brightly coloured cylinder was held up towards his face. A water bottle, Tango’s brain finally provided after several seconds. Tango managed to move his mouth enough to accept, its straw preventing him from spilling too horridly over himself. Even still, he quickly found himself choking, sputtering up much of what made it into his mouth. The stranger hummed to himself, waiting for Tango to cease his coughing before trying again, this time one gloved hand cradling the back of Tango’s head to hold him up just slightly. The water went down much easier. Only after it was taken away did it occur to Tango it may not be the best to trust the liquid. He was already a soft breeze away from death, what did it matter?

Because you still have to find Jimmy.

The stranger yelped, but Tango ignored him as he tried to push himself up. “Hey, there!” Hands found their way to the back and front of his torso, the only thing keeping him from collapsing back down as the brief pulse of energy abandoned him. “You took at least fifteen chomps, there, buddy, you’re in no condition to be on your feet.”

Tango tried to explain himself, tried to yell at the man. But all he could get out when he said Jimmy’s name was a squeak that tore up his throat. Insufficient. Though he tried to fight back, the stranger laid him back down. Tango tried not to sob. Everything hurt, everything was going horridly wrong, and his rancher was probably dead in a ditch somewhere. He’d follow soon enough at this rate. It was all so pointless-

Warmth wafted through the air. Sweet and achingly familiar. Tango’s head lulled to watch the stranger as he held up a fork towards him, the fluffy pasty dotted with berries and dripping syrup. “I hope you don’t mind, but I kinda live off instant pancake mix at the moment. If you can eat.”

Tango wasn’t sure he could, but he accepted the offer anyways. Even just the smell would have brought tears to Tango’s eyes if he could cry. The bites kept coming until Tango hadn’t the strength to eat anything more. His body screamed at him to both stop and eat, desperate for the food Tango had been denying it and lacking the strength to continue, stomach rolling in that fashion that he knew meant it would all come back up if he tried.

Silence returned while the stranger finished the rest, most of it still there. Anything else might have made Tango throw up from the smell anyways. All he could think of instead was breezy summer mornings, sat at an uneven oak table covered in blemishes that they never got around to replacing, throwing plastic tablecloths over instead. Coffee that became tea that became increasingly questionable flower water that became tea once more. The distant sounds of mooing and much closer sounds of barking, and, somewhere in between, a bird song matching whatever was on the stereo.

Why had they left? They should have stayed on the ranch. He should have tried harder to convince Jimmy not to go, should have put his foot down. When that bridge came into view he should have immediately turned them back around. They saw the ocean, and what good did it do them? Jimmy died, lost and far away from home, and Tango would soon join him...

The next time Tango woke up it was early morning. Something loud had ripped him from his slumber, but he could not for the life of him recall what it was. As best he could he looked around, and found the stranger shutting a cabinet set against a far wall. Tango must have made some sort of noise, because his head immediately swivelled towards him. “You’re awake again.” He said, matter of factly. There was too much energy in his hops to a kitchen. Did all avians wake up at the crack of dawn?

It was almost hard to watch the man, actually. Tango had seen it with Grian, but it hadn’t registered. Because he was a puffball and it only seemed natural, or because he’d never had reason to note it. This strangers talons similarly rarely touched the ground, taking leaps and bounds to reach for anything. Wings casually unfurled themselves to glide him across the room. It was so different to Jimmy, who stumbled his way everywhere, only used his wings for balance.

More food was set in front of him, this time a small bowl of mixed berries. “I already ate.” Explained the stranger while he held out a spoonful. “If it’s too hard to chew I can blitz it into a smoothie.”

“No.” Tango croaked. Easier than last time, but his throat still felt like it was splintering.

The stranger quietly fed him. The sun was quickly rising, but the avian didn’t seem to have anywhere to be. At some point Tango thought he heard the bark of a dog, but no one else came into the sky-lit room. The stranger’s clothes were not the sort one wore when they knew zombies were nearby. His sweater was sleeveless and his gloves were for sport, to keep frog scratching his hands and keeping a good grip, rather than the heavy leather work gloves Jimmy wore. The sort of thing they’d wear on peaceful days at the ranch, not the city Tango thought he was last in.

“So,” The man rocked his head slightly as he put the half-empty bowl aside. “You got a name, stranger? If you’re up for talkin’ of course.”

“Tango.” His voice scratched worse than it usually did, almost incoherent to his own ears. No long sentences, then. “You?”

“Wels, at your service.” He did a small bow, smile widening. “There’s not a lot of survivors out here these days, Tango. You musta come quite a ways?”

He nodded, wincing at the sting in his neck. Had he been bitten there? “We came from the mountains.”

Wels’ eyebrow rose. His hands began moving just outside Tango’s vision, fiddling with something. “’We’, huh? Run into some bad luck?”

“I’m looking.” Tango quickly snapped. “We got separated. He’s here.”

“You don’t sound like you believe that.”

Of course he didn’t. Tango had never been the optimistic sort. It was Jimmy who comforted them when things went wrong, calmed Tango down when he lost his temper. Thought there’d be an adventure to have exploring uncharted territory. If it was Jimmy here and now instead, he’d be just as determined as day one. Tango couldn’t do that, could barely hope to even find a body. But... “If I stop looking, I don’t know what I’ll do.”

The room fell quiet. A rough hand lifted the stump of Tango’s left arm, peeling something off it. It stung, but not as much as the air did seconds later. Tango grit his teeth. It last too long, but eventually it subsided into a dull ache. Even without looking he knew it was swollen and ugly, raw from wearing his arm for too long. It would take too much time to pull on and off without help. Why was he so stupid as to design it that way? Like he’d never be alone?

The dog outside continued to bark.

“Well, then,” Wels sighed. “Guess if you gotta keep looking then I’ll have to keep my eyes open, too.”

Tango strained to shake his head, “You don’t have to-

“Hey, it’s my city. Who better to keep an eye out? Besides,” He stood up, spreading his wings wide enough to block out the skylight, “You aren’t really getting out of bed any time soon, and you can’t exactly get back down without my help anyways.”

“Down?” Tango murmured to himself, turning towards the sunlight.

His vision was still a mess, but he could see it. Behind stacks of supplies and reorganized furniture was a wall-wide glass balcony, doors wedged wide open. Peeking over the rail was the very top of a half-dozen skyscrapers he recognized from the ground.

Wels hopped over towards the open doors, grabbing various items from a table. A bag, rope, a sword- was that metal gauntlets? By the time he’d kitted out he looked like he’d raided a museum exhibit. When he noticed Tango’s staring he gave him a grin and a thumbs up. “Gotta go for a water and medicine run. Be back before the sun sets.” He jumped up onto the railing, but paused. “Say, uh, what’d your buddy look like? In case I run into him.”

“Blond.” Tango rasped. “Lanky, bit taller than you. Long yellow wings. Should be with a big black dog with no eyes. Hopefully...”

Something in the man’s wings tensed, smile falling away. “A canary avian?” He asked.

“Yeah.”

“And you- how did you say you got separated.”

“He was gone when I woke up. He kept-”

“Wandering off?”

The blazeborn’s eyes narrowed. “Yeah... What-”

But Wels unfurled his wings once more, waving his hand dismissively. “We’ll talk later, when I get back. You should rest up, get back on your feet.”

With that he was gone.

Tango could feel his heart hammering in his chest, wounds pulsing down his limbs. He turned his gaze up to the ceiling. How on earth was he supposed to rest after that?

[heli-writes]

A dragon's heart, part 2.

Pairing: Barbarian!Bakugou Katsuki x female!reader

Summary: The dragonblood tribe is known for being cruel, barbarian warriors that slaughter, loot and rape all places they pass through. They are feared among the villagers and even bigger cities. Having lost most of their women to a plague, they're trying to ensure their tribe's survival by kidnapping women from other places. However, they're not the only monsters in human form out there. When y/n experiences this first hand, she has no choice but to ask for help from no other but the barbarian leader Katsuki Bakugou himself.

Disclaimer: mentions of injuries

[Please don't read if you are sensible to or triggered by the topics mentioned above.]

Part 1, Part 2, Part 3

Series Masterlist

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Y/n feels like a wagon drove her over. There's a drumming pain in her head and her shoulder. She groans and massages her forehead. Slowly, she opens her eyes, not wanting the light to sting her eyes too much. To her surprise, the light is dimmed by a red fabric that is stretched above her. "A tent?", she thinks to herself and stretches her hand upwards to touch the fabric. It feels like leather and... is warm? Suddenly the fabric moves and is jerked away. When a bony structure comes into vision, y/n realizes it's a wing, not a tent.

"Oh gods, it wasn't a bad dream", she realizes and tries to sit up carefully. Her joints are stiff and her muscles hurt with every move. "I really pushed myself to my limit", y/n thinks and massages her injured arm. She hears a raspy breath beside her and she remembers that she is sitting next to a very real and very alive dragon. She turns to her side and is met with a giant, red lizard eye. Fear pulses through her veins and her heart rate immediately picks up. She tries to scramble away from the dragon but her aching legs and arms barely have the strength to move her. The dragon shows no attention to follow or attack her.

The smell of smoke and roasted meat fills her nose. Only then y/n manages to take in her surroundings. The dead men on the other side of the clearing have disappeared and y/n wonders for a second if they were ever there. Right behind her is the fire she's smelling. The strange man is standing in front of it and roasts a piece of meat over the open flame. His back is turned to her and he shows no intentions to turn around to her. "I guess he doesn't consider me a threat.", she thinks. Y/n watches as the stranger pours some oil on the meat and turns it over again. Y/n swallows thickly. Her throat feels dry and itchy. She wonders why she's still alive. When she turns her head to her shoulder she notices the bandages that are wrapped around it. There's no arrow. "Did he pull it out?", y/n ponders. "Must be this way. It probably wasn't the dragon", she thinks to herself and gives the dragon a side-eye. The dragon has placed its head back onto its front paws and closed its eyes. Y/n relaxes a bit. Seems like neither the dragon nor the stranger is a threat to her right now.

Y/n tries to get up. Her legs are wobbly and she barely manages to get up. She tries to support her with her arms and a sharp pain shoots down her arm. She really should not use that arm for a while. Y/n staggers over to the stranger. "Uhm, I'm sorry?", she says timidly. Her voice sounds hoarse and deep. The man barely takes notice of her. Y/n stops in her step, scared to get closer. The man gives her a glance and sits down on a tree trunk behind him. He still doesn't acknowledge her presence. Y/n slowly walks up to him and sits down next to him on the trunk. She leaves some space just to be sure.

"So, uhm, did you treat my wound?", she asks carefully. Her voice still sounds awful. The man grunts and reaches to the ground. Without looking at her, he hands her over a bottle. "Uhm, thanks.", y/n says and takes the bottle. She takes a sniff and decides that it's water. She quickly takes some chugs of it. The water feels like heaven to her abused throat. When she's done, she hands back the bottle of water. For a while, the two of them sit in silence. After a while, y/n relaxes a bit. The man gets up from time to time to turn around the meat. Eventually, he takes the meat down and puts it on a plate. Y/n eyes how he cuts it in two. He takes a piece with his bare hands and hands the plate to y/n. Y/n stares up at him. "Am I allowed to eat this?", she wonders as she stares at the meat in her lap.

Finally, the man turns to her with his mouth full of meat. He says something unintelligible and points at the meat and then at her angrily. "I guess that answers my question.", she thinks and carefully picks up the meat. It's still hot and y/n almost burns her fingers. Quietly, she starts eating. The meat is good. The man must've put some spices on it. Only after the first bite, y/n notices how starved she is. When she's done, she hands the plate back to the stranger. The stranger starts tidying up around the campsite and y/n watches him. When he's done, he turns around and faces her.

Stinging red eyes pierce hers and y/n almost jumps from the intensity that lies behind them. Y/n suddenly feels very small under their burning gaze. Again the man says something y/n doesn't understand and points towards her. Y/n thinks he sounds angry but maybe it's just the language he speaks that makes him sound like that. When y/n doesn't move or say anything, the stranger stomps over to her and grabs her uninjured shoulder roughly. He turns her around and starts undoing the bandages on her shoulder. Y/n doesn't turn her head to see what he's doing. She's not too keen on looking at the wound. If it looks as terrible as it feels, she'd rather not look at it. She feels how the man peels something away from the wound and how the air hits the wound. It feels kind of cool. She hears the man scramble through some things. Suddenly a burning liquid is poured over the injury and the man wipes at the wound ferociously. It hurts and y/n flinches.

The man barks something at her and grabs her other shoulder roughly. "He probably wants me to sit still.", she thinks and tries her best to sit still as stone as the man continues to probe at her wound. Eventually, he wraps her shoulder up again and y/n watches how he puts the bandaging materials back into a bag. Carefully, y/n touches the bandages the stranger put on her. "I guess he is kind of nice after all.", she thinks to herself, "Although I really don't want to get on his bad side." She shudders at the memory of how the man sliced open the villager yesterday.

Y/n clears her throat and she notices how the stranger gives her a side-eye. "Thank you for treating my wound.", she tells him. The man sits back on the trunk again and pulls out a knife. He starts sharpening the end of a branch into a spear. "So, what's your name?", she asks him. The man gives her an angry glance and scoffs. Y/n scoots a bit closer. "He probably doesn't understand me either.", she concludes.

Softly, she touches his arm. And the man immediately jerks it away from her, looking at her as if he's about to spit out a string of curse words. Y/n points towards herself. "I'm Y/n.", she says. Then she points at him. "And you?", she asks. The man doesn't answer her. If he didn't look so angry, he probably would look confused. Y/n points at her again. "Y/n.", she says and then points at him again, looking at him expectantly. The man turns away from her and continues to sharpen his branch. Just when y/n gives up trying to find out his name, the man says without looking at her: "Katsuki".

"Katsuki.", y/n repeats and tries out how the name feels like rolling off her tongue. When she turns to the stranger, or Katsuki, she gives him a soft smile. Katsuki stares at her intensely with his red eyes and y/n wonders for a moment if she pronounced it wrongly. Then, he turns away almost looking embarrassed.

*~*~*

Actually, that's exactly how Katsuki feels like. When he told y/n his name, he did not expect her to say it this sweetly. He's been annoyed with y/n since she showed up at his camp. Even more annoyed with the men behind her. He's not sure why he helped you. In his world, nothing else matters besides his own tribe, his own people. The only time other people matter is when his people can gain something from them. May it be coin, intel or ... heirs. Maybe that's why he saved her. She's a woman after all. His people painfully learned how important it is to keep their women safe. There's not much of a future without them.

He sighs and runs a hand through his uneven hair and gives y/n a glance. Y/n stares at her hands, unsure what to say or do next. He's not sure either. In the past few years, it has become a custom that men from his tribe take women home from their raids. Since most of the fertile women of his tribe succumbed to sickness, it's their only option to ensure their future. So far, it's not very successful. These women weren't like them. They don't understand his tribe's culture. Hell, most of them don't even speak their language. Like the woman sitting next to him. They're just frail little things, taken from their homes, living in fear of their new home and their new mates. Y/n doesn't look any different from them.

Katsuki gets up angrily and shakes his head. Why is he even thinking about this? He's not taking this woman home. It has never been in the cards. There are different plans for his future. This pathetic female should be thankful that he took the time out of his day to kill those bastards for her. She should just run along, going back to her sad little life. He scoffs and starts gathering his weapons. He has come here to hunt. To bring back a victory for his people. To show them that they can rely on him. Whether to lead them into battle or to feed them. He doesn't look back at the woman sitting by the fire.

*~*~*

Y/n watches as Katsuki gathers his gear. She's not sure what she's supposed to do. Does he want her to leave? Does he want her to stay? Even if she can't understand him, at least he could say something. Katsuki fastens the satchel on his dragon. "Is he leaving?", y/n asks herself. Without sparing her another glance, the man mounts the enormous beast and with three mighty swings of its wings, the dragon is in the air. Y/n throws her head back and watches as the warrior becomes smaller and smaller. Dumbfoundedly, she spins in a circle. Y/n notices that the man left most of his supplies. Cooking utensils, the medicine bag and some other things are neatly tucked away beside the fireplace. Y/n furrows her brow. Was she supposed to look after this stuff? Or does he simply not care if his stuff gets stolen?

For the next twenty minutes or so, y/n walks the clearing up and down playing her limited interaction with Katsuki over and over in her mind. Did she miss something? Lowkey, she hopes he just needs to get something quickly and that he returns to the clearing in no time. When it's clear that he won't return anytime soon, y/n decides to leave as well. She feels stupid lingering around waiting for a man who will maybe never come back, or worse, who gets back and is angry that she's still around. Considering what happened yesterday, she really doesn't want to become the focus of his wrath. Or the one of his dragon.

Y/n stomps through the forest, figuring out her next move. Though stomping would be the wrong word. Her legs hurt so badly, she must look like a scarecrow that has come to live and not stagers around on its wooden legs. After a short while, she already needs a break. The pain in her shoulder has gotten worse again. She leans against a tree and watches the treetops move in the soft summer breeze. Suddenly, a deep feeling of despair hits her and she sinks down the tree trunk. Tears burn in her eyes and before she can stop them, they overflow.

All of a sudden, it hits her in what kind of situation she is in. She is all alone in the middle of nowhere. Everything she needed to survive got either stolen or destroyed. There is no place she can return to. She could try her luck at the capital. However, her brother probably departed to another place in the kingdom and she has no way to contact him. Hell, she probably wouldn't make it to the capital without supplies or coins. Moreover, who knows if her brother would even take her in. They never had a bad relationship but it also wasn't strong enough for him to stick around.

Y/n weeps and sorrowful sobbs fill the quiet forest air. She doesn't realize it but she hasn't cried since her parents died. It's like everything that she's bottled up over the years suddenly burst out of her. She cries until her head hurts and her sleeves are soaked with tears and snot. Only when she physically can't cry any longer, she stops to catch her breath.

Slowly, but steadily, she calms down again. She stares up at the sky for a while until she finds the strength to sort her thoughts. "It's no use", she tells herself, "I need a game plan. Otherwise, I won't survive". She gets up with newfound determination. "I need to ensure that basic needs are fulfilled first before I can think of things like getting to the capital.", she figures.

Firstly, y/n inspects what little she has in her bag that is slung around her uninjured shoulder. A small carving knife, some yarn, bee wax for her lips and cheeks, an empty glass jar, a pair of fingerless leather gloves, a notebook and a pencil. It's not much but in her head, y/n is already figuring out what it can be used for. The knife will be useful for sure. The yarn could be used for building a shelter. She can carry water in the jar. The bag itself leaves some room for provisions.

Food, water, shelter. That is her new focus. Y/n puts her things back into her bag and decides she should look for water and food first before finding a shelter for the night. Y/n puts her bag over her shoulder and starts walking. Wandering from place to place and walking for long distances between settlements, her people taught her how to find water in the wilderness and what plants are edible. Her father even taught her how to shoot squirrels with a bow for meat but since she has no bow, she will have to settle for something vegetarian.

After gathering food and water, y/n needs to take a break. Her shoulder and injured ankle hurt badly and she can only limp by now. The shadows on the forest floor get longer as the sun disappears behind the tree crowns. Y/n shivers as she tries to figure out what to do about shelter. Her thoughts are interrupted by a loud detonation somewhere North of her location. She sits in silence as she hears screeching birds fly away. It's distant enough for her not to worry about it but close enough for her to wonder what the sound was. "Didn't sound like a tree falling over. Maybe a landslide?", she wonders. However, she's sure it sounded more like lightning striking something. Considering that there's no cloud in the sky, that's unlikely.

Y/n decides not to test her luck and to look for shelter in the opposite direction. She makes only slow progress. She hopes to find a cave or a hollow tree to sleep in. She's sure that she won't be able to build a sturdy shelter with her injured shoulder. Suddenly, there's a whooshing sound above her and when she looks up, she sees the tip of a red tail disappearing out of her sight. That damn dragon. She shouldn't be surprised that she's not out of its range considering the slow pace she had to settle into due to her injuries.

Y/n hesitates for a second. She was moving in the direction that the dragon had just flown into. She's not really keen on meeting that thing again. Then again, that strange noise came from the other direction. Y/n decides that the dragon might be responsible for the sound earlier. Still, turning back is not really an option considering that she did not find any place for shelter earlier. Taking a deep breath, she continues her way through the undergrowth. She just hopes the dragon covers more ground than her or returns to Katsuki's camp eventually.

*~*~*

Katsuki's pissed off when he returns to his campsite. He's been following a flock of deer for a couple of days now. He has his eye on a mighty stag. It sure will be a trophy to bring back home. However, so far his luck is not good. Yesterday's encounter and the noises of the bastards he killed must've startled the flock. They must've fled the area and it took most of the day to track them down. When he finally found them, he missed the stag by an inch. Which of course startled the whole group and tomorrow he can start tracking them down all over again.

Almost, he forgot the strange woman he left at the clearing. Upon his arrival, he didn't even notice her absence at first. When he does notice, he only scoffs angrily. "Good", he thinks, "She got the hint". However, while he prepares dinner, his thoughts drift off. He wonders how far y/n could've gotten on her injured foot. He wonders if the woman knows how to clean and dress a wound. If the wound on her shoulder gets infected, that will be a death sentence for sure. Especially out here in the wilderness. Unless her tribe is close and can take care of her. Then again if those bastards from yesterday were from her tribe, it's probably better if she doesn't return. Actually, if there are more of these bastards out there, her cards are bad anyway.

Frustratedly, Katsuki groans and throws his cooking utensils on the ground. His dragon looks over at him curiously. "What'cha looking at?", he mumbles and ruffles his hair. Katsuki stares into the flames of his bonfire pondering on what to do. Eventually, he jumps up and whistles at his dragon. Within seconds, they are in the air.

Katsuki steers his dragon to fly low above the treelines. He keeps his eyes on the ground, looking out for y/n. They patrol the area for a while until it gets too dark to see and Katsuki is sure he wouldn't be able to see the woman even if she was directly beneath them. He turns his dragon around and sets course towards his camp when he sees the flickering light of a fire in a short distance. "Gotcha.", Katsuki smirks and steers the beast towards the light.

With a rumble, the dragon's feet touch the ground. Y/n is kneeling in front of a small fire. Clearly, the woman has not been paying attention as she pushes herself back from the giant monster in front of her. Katsuki slides off its back and stomps towards her. "What the fuck are you doing?", he yells at her. "The whole forest can see you here! Can't believe you managed to stay alive on your own for a whole day.", he continues to scold her. Y/n only looks up at him with a dumbfounded expression. Actually, she might look a little scared.

Katsuki regains composure. He's yelling at a woman who doesn't understand shit. Of course, she's scared. He scoffs. Y/n's campsite is pitiful. Katsuki is surprised that she managed to light a fire on her own. Still, that light could lure in all kinds of nasty stuff. Unsure what to do, Katsuki hovers over her for a moment. Eventually, he tries to grab her. Clearly, the woman has been expecting him to make a move and struggles against him. Katsuki manages to get a hold of her nevertheless, considering he's taller and stronger than her and y/n's mobility is restricted due to her injuries. Katsuki throws her over his shoulder and saunters over to his dragon. He places the woman onto the saddle and climbs up behind her. With a click of his tongue, the dragon rises into the air.

*~*~*

Y/n clings onto the handle of the saddle for dear life and pushes her back into Katsuki's chest. In her lifetime, y/n had little experience with heights. Turns out, she's deadly afraid of them. Maybe it's also due to the gigantic lizard between her legs or the wild, barbarian man who just kidnapped her. However, right now, that man is the only person holding her into place and keeping her from falling to her death.

When they land at Katsuki's campsite, y/n is as pale as a ghost and when Katsuki pulls her off the dragon, her legs give out under her. The man lets out a string of sentences that sound like complaints and drags her over to the fireplace. Y/n tries to regain her composure as she watches Katsuki light up a fire and skin a rabbit. When he starts gutting the animal, y/n turns away in disgust. It's not like she finds the act itself gross. That's something she herself has done multiple times before. It's just that her stomach still feels queasy from the involuntary flight earlier and it's not the most appetizing process in the world.

A headache starts to form when she listens to Katsuki piercing the rabbit with a long stick and roasting it above the open fire. "Why am I here again?", she thinks to herself. It didn't strike her as if Katsuki wanted her around. After all, he left her here earlier today without sparing her a single glance. If he'd wanted her to stay around, he could've made that clear even without saying a word.

Suddenly she feels a nudge in her side. When she opens her eyes, Katsuki holds out a piece of meat to her without looking at her. Y/n is not really hungry but takes the meat anyway. They eat in silence. When they're done, they sit in front of the fire for a little while. Eventually, Katsuki breaks the silence. In a low, calm voice he talks to her. Of course, y/n doesn't understand him but she finds his voice soothing. She wonders how a person can sound so diverse. She finds it a lot nicer when Katsuki talks like that than how he did when he found her earlier. Despite her best efforts, she finds herself getting drowsy. Her eyes start to fall close and her whole body starts swaying. She doesn't notice how Katsuki slides closer to her or how her head hits his shoulder when she falls asleep.

*~*~*

Katsuki's not sure why he moved to catch her head. Also, he's not sure why he went after her in the first place. He runs his hand through his hair. "How annoying", he thinks. He stays at the fire for a little while longer letting y/n rest on his shoulder.

Eventually, he prepares to get up. Slowly, he pulls y/n onto his lap and gets up lifting y/n up with him. He already noticed yesterday how light she was. He wonders if this woman gets enough to eat. Carefully he carries her over to his bedroll. There's not really enough space for two people, so he lets y/n rest on it. He puts his red coat over the woman. Almost gently, he pushes some strands of hair out of y/n's face.

He puts out the bonfire and settles next to his dragon. Leaning against it, he crosses his arms over his chest and stares at the dark forest surrounding them.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Tag list: @graviewaviee @cosmicbreathe @tsukikoxo @nnubee @witchbishsblog @elajede @bsallergy @frxcless @berryvioo @eyesforbkg @shamelesjaroflaffytaffy @pastelbaby1111 @iamlizardgod @plvt0fvtvre @hello-peanutdoodle-blog @guccirosegold @kookiemyfeelsposts @sweetblueworm @54fangirl @sakurarr1122 @rv19 @leeliyah @king-dynamight @confused-smol-fan @xmaudx @waterstarz @pinkwhiskerglitter @adeline96 @zoom1374 @fingui @giuli-in-earth @colouringfrogssittinginleaves @futuristicallykawaiiturtle @tragedyofabrokensoul @dynakats @rebel-loves-anime @cloudxluv @itsssyagurll

[Please comment if you'd like to be tagged in future chapters]

[marysdigdiaries101]

NEW INTERESTS

summary: as business woman barbie, you had to be quite serious and uptight about your field of work. so when you couldn't make it sleepover night, which wasn't unexpected of course ꒰but nevertheless꒱ , stereotypical barbie comes to check up on you.

warning/s: top! barbie, bottom! reader, no smut, but it's implied, fluff/comfort, tired reader, talk of depression, swearing, not proofread, pretend they have genitals btw.

word count: forgot to check lmao

authors note: hi hi hii ! first post omg? i just watched the new barbie movie and..im fucking obsessed, i swear i missed half the movies dialogue tho cause i was admiring margot's gorgeous face. anyway i thought what if we had a super stressed, borderline depressed barbie who just needed a break from her thoughts ? enjoy pookies ! ୨♡୧

+ btw men dni.

navigation ! | ୨♡୧

the wheels of your pastel pink car came to a stop in your driveway as you sluggishly dragged yourself out of the drivers seat. another long day, another girls night you couldn't deal with. bright lights illuminated the moving bodies on the vast dance floor, pointed stilettos tapping and turning swiftly as stiff hands clapped and clicked to the music.

clutching your purse, you moved across the dance floor, avoiding flapping arms and desperate kens in need of a dance partner. as you got to the last section of your mission, you felt a pair of eyes on you, a pair of eyes that were too familiar for you to shake off. looking over to your far left you found a set ocean blue eyes staring right back at you. the one and only stereotypical barbie. the perfect one, the main bitch of barbieland acknowledging your presence.

conversations between the two of you were very scarce. with you having a very busy work life and her having none at all, you never crossed paths that much. but living right across from her was a given, so conversations at times were necessary.

brushing off the nervous feeling that had crept up on you, you silently scolded yourself for the rosy blush that had quickly painted your cheeks. once again, clutching your purse tighter, you resumed your journey to your apartment in the lively dreamhouse.

the scratched door creaked open as you released your grip on the plastic doorknob. in any other room you can pretty much expect bright pinks and yellows and lovely colors..but not yours. in fact it wasn't the case at all.

black scribble lines all over formerly hot pink walls, torn up grey bed sheets, deflated pillows, a bedside rug that was once a lovely shade of baby blue now a murky lake green, and scratches, whoever was messing with this room had a no sense for care, as this room, this room was desecrated with scratches and marks.

sighing, you flopped unto the creaky mattress, the back of your knees hitting the plastic bed structure. reaching over to your achy feet, you pulled off the black heels that had been causing you anguish the whole day.

dropping your heels, you unzipped your pale pink silk dress, one of the very rare bright pieces of clothing you had left. flinging it over to the other side of the room, you tapped over to your closet, the once shiny, luxurious white structure, scribbled on and vandalised; stripped of its pride. you looked through the distressed drawer that had been left open from the mornings' rush. music flooded into the silence of your room as picked out navy blue pyjama bottoms and a tight fitted white tank top.

as if by magic (no pun intended) , your desired clothing adorned your slim body as you strolled over to your bed, plopping yourself on it and sinking into the mattress.

thoughts clouded your mind like a raging storm, keeping you a prisoner of your own mind. weird barbie said this would happen a lot more so it shouldn't have been unexpected. but it still hit you like a brick every time the thought of stereotypical barbie flooded your head. her plump lips, the crystal blue eyes that locked you in a trance at the slightest glance and her hair, oh god her hair. you just wanted to run your fingers through the golden curls. you wanted to tangle your fingers in it, you wanted to ruin it, you hated how perfect it was.

you hated her. you hated how ken adored her, how everyone was so goddamn drawn to her, it was like the town revolved around her jobless ass. you wanted her. you needed her. you needed her to need you. but you had your ken and she had hers, and that was that.

the last person who uttered a word about a barbie and a barbie or a ken and a ken was weird barbie and look how she turned out. it's not like you weren't weird yourself, with your heels dropping, thoughts about death, uncanny interests in barbie , your burnt waffles and messed up room and messed up clothes, you were borderline line outcast. you just hadn't been sent to the weird house yet.

'it's only a matter of time though'. you thought shutting your eyes. the late nights and early mornings catching up to you.

it only seemed like a few minutes before you felt the opposite side of your bed sink and a warm hand on your icy shoulder. shrieking, you leaped into an upright position, very nearly hitting your head on your heart shaped headboard.

"jesus! what the hell.." you came to an abrupt stop as you looked over to your side meeting a very dear set of eyes. "look, i'm sorry for barging in so randomly, i know you were sleeping and you're a very busy woman and-" the words mushed together in your head as you focused on her pouty lips. you would let her talk for hours on end if it meant seeing those lips move.

"it's okay." you stated, the corners of your lips turning up. "really? i mean i could leave honestly! it's no biggie..i mean if you want me stay i could?" the icy blonde rambled meeting your gaze softly. "i promise your fine." you assured her shuffling a bit, suddenly feeling very naked.

"so why are you here?" you questioned, sinking back into the comfort of your duvet. dropping your gaze, she fiddled with her velvet night gown, undoing the strings and redoing them. "..well i don't know, you looked more down than usual and you at least make it to the nail painting sessions in my room, but today you missed the whole night altogether." barbie confessed, searching your y/e/c eyes for reasons.

"i know, but-" "you promised." she stated, cutting your flimsy excuse short. "i'm sorry. i've just- i've had some things on my mind as of recent." you explained, your eyes looking at barbies' room across from yours.

“ what type of thoughts?” you raised your eyebrow at her answering her question silently. “right. too far… sorry.” she blushed, tucking her blonde hair behind her ears. an uncomfortable silence filled the room as barbie crossed her legs, moving dangerously close to you.

clearing your throat, you glanced at her figure, letting the image cloud your senses. the curve of her hips to the sharp cut of her jawline, she really was the perfect barbie.

“i have thoughts about death too.” barbie whispered. you didn’t reply so she continued “all the time actually. they’re more frequent than they used to be. i thought maybe someone felt the same way as me so i shared it during the dance party downstairs, but, they just looked at me like i was.. weird.”

your heart rate tripled as you gazed up at her. she looked so.. vulnerable. all this time you had thought you were alone in this paradise. you thought of yourself as the elephant in the room. but there was a chance that the one person you thought was perfect, was just as fucked up as you.

“i’m so sorry, i’m gonna leave now-” “stay.” you muttered connecting your eyes with hers. “what?” the blonde asked, a bewildered look on her face. “i think about death too. maybe we have more in common than we thought.” you explained, running your fingers through your y/h/c haphazardly layered hair.

grinning immediately barbie sat back down, babbling instantly. and you did what anyone would do if they were in that same situation, you stared at her with hearts in your eyes, smiling broadly.

only mattel knew how you ended up sprawled across your bed with barbie straddling your lap, braiding chunks of your hair. who knew depressive thoughts could bond two dolls like this?

“your eyes are so pretty.” you murmured gazing up into her ocean blues. blushing she retorted : “oh shut up.” , but you could tell from her scarlet cheeks and darting eyes that she appreciated the compliment.

“can i kiss you?” you blurted, not being able to hold yourself back. barbie stared at you, her eyes glistening. preparing yourself for rejection you opened your mouth only to have it shut by pillowy lips.

stars behind your eyelids, in fact a whole constellation. gliding your fingers up the small of her back, you reciprocated the kiss as she cupped your face softly. biting your bottom lip, she explored your mouth slowly. sucking on your tongue, she extracted a well deserved moan out of you.

“fuck y/n” she groaned, grinding on you. moaning desperately, you fervently moved your hands around her body as she pulled away. breathing heavily you both stared at each other lovingly. “the others will hear..” she commented, returning to fiddling with your hair. agreeing, you smirked as she looked at your lips.

“i better go then. i don’t want you tired tomorrow, busy work life and all.” the blonde remarked as she slowly stood up. “mhm” you retorted, as you let your eyes wander all over her body.

“i’ll see you tomorrow, sleep well okay?” she stated, looking over at you as she got to the door. “i will.” you grinned, snuggling into your comforter. and at that she giggled as she closed your door, the echo of her voice promising you of better days. ˗ˏˋ ꒰ 🩰 ꒱ ˎˊ˗

[perpetualcosmos]

Astrology insights on Health & More! Pt. 2

*Please Note these are all my personal observations and research, not yet from a professional opinion!*

---> Body part ruled by Taurus is... Neck, shoulders, ears and throat! Now, What it means is that these natives usually have wide, elegant necks, shoulders and even jawlines depending on where they have their Taurus placements. Ex: Personally seen that natives which have Taurus in either 3rd house, in mercury or Venus conjunct mercury in, 2nd house placements, 3rd house placement and basically mercury placements indicating that these natives have a deep voice.

---> Taurus placements (Specially in conjunction, sextile or trine) always carry an energy of elegance. These natives always have a way with their voice, their body and their posture that draws people in. A pull, sensual and hypnotizing.

---> Prone to be interested in Art, Design, Photography, cinematography, music, dancing, etc., in it's most Venusian form, Taurus natives are hard working... when they want to be, otherwise you cannot pull them for anything to do. They have their priorities straight and keep clear of what doesn't suit them. But the tendency to overindulgence in things like food, sex, drugs, money, etc. Is highly prominent.

---> Really, Financial freedom isn't everything, and so isn't pleasure. A thing I have always noticed with Taurus natives is that they might be inclined to aroma and massages, a good way for these natives to decompress is maybe having a self care day with going to the spa, taking care of your hair, going for aromatherapy, going for shopping and indulging in things which make them feel safe.

---> Security & stability is extremely important to Taurus placements/2nd House placements/Taurus degrees holders (2°,14°,26°). But because of their nature, these natives tend to only focus on financial stability, often forgetting emotional investment is just as important. Signs in the body could be stiff shoulders, a blocked throat, always being told they don't "listen", not being able to take a proper break, mood swings, etc. Extremely prominent when these placements in a person's chart are underdeveloped.

---> Taurus placement carry similarities with their sister sign, Scropio, such as:

• Control - a major theme for both signs in opposite sectors, for Taurus natives, it's mostly money and finance. On the other hand, emotional and sensual control is for Scorpio natives.

• Obsession - as mentioned above, in the sectors.

• Pleasure - Both appreciate Pleasure, for Scorpio placements it's intimate, powerful, a connection and always transformative -- it's in the emotional. For Taurus placements, it's imagination, realistic and 3D focused -- it's in the material.

Ex: Adele with a Taurus Sun in 11th house at 15° (cancer degree)! Should I be even shocked that she is a singer, known for her voice and beauty everywhere? Absolutely not lol. Supporting this, is her Mercury in Gemini in the 12th house at 0° (I can't make this up). She is someone who is known for her music all over the world, carrying so much of her emotions and her ability to reach high notes. She definitely has a beautiful neck and shoulders, with her being very expressive about what she wants through art (which in her case, is music!). Another example is of Keira Knightley with a Taurus moon. Definitely something who carries a strong Jaw and bone structure, along with again wide shoulders and great posture. Her energy also draws in people on the stage, you can't help falling in love with how dedicatedly she carries her with her Moon conjunct Mars in Taurus. No wonder she is so dedicated to her Art (here it's acting). A beautiful thing about Taurus moons is when they find something that they are extremely passionate about, no one can stop them from achieving their goals and giving their best. Especially when they love their work, it shows Everywhere.

Other examples are Zendaya, Nick Jonas, Lindsay Lohan, Donald Grover, Channing Tatum, Miley Cyrus, Gigi Hadid, Robert Pattinson and more.

Source: Pinterest

____________________________

A/N: Thank you for checking this post out and omg thank you for the likes and follows 🥹🫶

*I am so grateful for all of you, thank you for your support. I wasn't sure if I should do this but because of you... I am here. Thank you. And I just want to say if no one has told you lately... I am proud of you, you are trying so hard, even if it's just you being alive. Thank you, I am grateful you are here to read this.*

With love & grace 🥹✨

[blaithnne]

Local big sister experiences emotions, more at 6

Been wanting to do one of these with Lauren for AGES, but I never got round to it. Then I saw the Lydia and Phinium expression sheets on @littledigits’ website and I felt inspiration like never before.

The funniest struggle I have with Lauren’s design right now is that she nose too big for she got damn face. Literally, Hilda characters noses take up a fairly small portion of their faces, and her’s took up WAY too much, leaving little room for her to make facial expressions. But I struggled to find a fix because when I made the nose smaller it just didn’t look like Lauren anymore, so I took this as an opportunity to work on that!

She still has a larger nose than most characters, starting higher up (like her grandad!) and ending lower down (but not quite as low as before). I also made her eyes a little smaller and with a shape similar to Lydia’s (though you can see in some of these I hadn’t quite landed on that yet and her eyes are a bit too big), which works both as a nod to her parentage and because I think it makes the nose look bigger. This still doesn’t leave as much room for the mouth as most other characters, but that’s okay — Lauren is a very private person who keeps her feelings close to her chest, I think it works for her to have subtler expressions, adds to how guarded she is! Oh and I also updated the shape of her hair slightly, just to make it a bit more style accurate.

These changes are pretty small on their own, but I think combined they work well to make Lauren feel a lot more…alive? Far less stiff, anyway. I think she also has a more unique facial structure now, instead of just “what if Johanna was 90% nose”. She’s still got a big old nose and I love it but now she can emote, yay!

This is really all just concept stuff, I’m hoping to get a new fullbody style-ref for Lauren out soon! Now that I’ve improved the main issues I had with her face in the last ref, now it’s onto the silhouette! I want her to read as more of a strong character (though it comes across decently in her current ref, I wanna push it more without being as exaggerated as Ahlberg, which is. A challenge for me lol), streamline her silhouette, and finally make her taller than Johanna like she’s always meant to have been <3 I made her shorter for so long because I thought it would help her read better as her daughter but you know what? That’s dumb actually, she’s tall.

ANYWAYS, thank you for listening in on the annual Lauren redesign, and to the artists behind the show for posting so much amazing inspiring show stopping concept work for free because it makes my autism worse /pos

[tarotenchantress]

Astro observations ptV Aye-Aye and the swan edition🦢🏹

DO NOT PLAGIARISE MY WORK🚫

All these observations are based on my personal experience.

By- tarotenchantress🧚🏻‍♀️

The following observations are based on my understanding of what placement may make one think that they are ugly, dont fit the "ideal" box, are always noticed for their looks, are criticised for their looks, have their worth attached to their looks, have people compare them/ rate them for their looks, feel that nothing they do makes them feel pretty, are treated differently for their appearance, are considered stupid because of their appearance, bear the brunt of others envy and projection because of their appearance and those who become vain in their beauty .

Aye-aye is a lemur that is associated with ugliness due to its appearance and swan, as we all know, is associated with beauty because of its appearance, hence the title🏹🤍

🦢 venus in hard aspects with saturn, saturn in venusian degrees of libra (7°,19°)and taurus(2°,14°,26°), venus in capricorn or aquarius.

[This placement may make you very critical of your appearance, it can also mean that to an extent you may nitpick on your features alot, feel like your face is not "balanced" enough or "proportionate enough", call yourself names and idk why the word gross came inmy my mind so maybe some of you are also doing that or do that. This placement is also extremely prone to hating on their body too specifically the hip areas may feel as if their ass is too flat or it are not "pretty". This placement also indicates growing into your features later in life. Some mught even hate their voice or feel uncomfortable listening to their voice. People with this placement may also have suppressed anger issues esp when people comment on their body as neither of these signs and planets are extremely vocal about their pain. Youmay also feel as if no one understands your pain or people tend to be extremelycold or uncaring towards your body issues. Some people may also force you to believe that you have "masculine" features and they maypick on it. You may feel as if people around you judge you alot for appearance and tend to withhold opportunities just cause of your appearance. This placement also indicates that you either got into makeup very early on orrr you got introduced to it way later. This placement to be honest also indicates that one might hate their nose or its bone structure and feel as if it has "ruined" their face and the proportionality. Cynicism may also arise when it comes to appearance. You guys remember that tiktok audio which went like "how old are you?" "Im 19" "you look older" "its not a compliment" yeahh it mught be some scene like that too. Ans i also feel that people may pick on your ass or hips or nose or ears or your throat or voice in general or you may do it. And you may also look into workouts specifically of glutes and to increase the lower hip area and may also hate singing or feel extremely insecure about it. They may get a lot hate from feminine energies or may feel as if women were far more critical of them. Stiff lower back too]

🦢 ascendant in hard aspects with saturn, venus, mars, ascendant in capricorn or capricorn degrees, aspecting 10th house.

[People with

Venus in hard aspect with ascendant may not even see their own beauty. Its almost as if they become so vain with idealising others and other body types esp hourglass figures that they forget about their own appearance and feel dejected. They may also feel extremely jealous if other women looking the way they idealise or may get upset. Venus also demands perfectionism and this placement indicates never being happy with you appearance. Almost as if there's always something to pick on, something out of place something to hate on. Especially the ass area, it may be a point of insecuriry for some.

Mars in hard aspects may always feel as if their body is not "soft" enough or on the contrary not "healthy" enough. They may also have a sensitive ir "red" skin. The undertone of their skin may be reddish too. They may feel as if they "look too boxy" may often idealise a body with abs and muscles or a more feminine body [not gender specific] and mayworkout just to get that look or on the contrary may hate their "manly look" and try to hide it and hate it being the focus of attention. They may also have a love hate relationship with the feminine side of themselves as they may try to show up as more aggressive or dominating or masculine. They may be very hard on their body. One may also be impatient. This placement is also an indicator that masculine energies or men may not have been the kindest towards you may have passed absurd comments on your bosy. Also indicates that youmay be someone who might get into physical fights which may scar your appearance in some way. Dw this doesnt have to be the case for all.

Ascendant in hard aspects with saturn may hate their skeletal system.may feel as if their bones are not strong enough. May feel insecure about their bones as they may be "sticking out" or "weirdly shaped" may also be on the skinnier end may have been picked on for being like that. Adults may be harsh on you since childhood for you appearance. This placement struggles to see beauty in everyday life, in themselves. Very prone to melancholic phases. May want to get surgery done but too scared of its process and effects and failures. Also idk how to say this, like, its not for everyone but you may have a "boney" ass or you may feel like you have a "boney" ass.. Im so sorry omg. Stretching js a muat with this placement as you may feel your back getting stiff. Lower back esp. You may also fear sex and have it later in life and intimacy too and you may feel robotic in sexual acts. May mean tgst you like to dress up more conservatively or your dressing sense may be on the formal mature end.

[Similar effects seen for the remaining. Cap rising, rising in cap degrees, aspecting 10th house]

I have ascendant □ saturn and i tell you what. i used have alot of acne on my forehead and i also had a very oily skin cause i was 13 and i ended up using a pumice stone on my forehead cause pain was the only way for it to go away🤡]

[Capricorn or aqua here may do the same, 10th house placements too]

🦢neptune aspecting ascendant and sun esp harsher aspects in 1st house.

You may not even understand how you look like. Like genuinely having no sense of how your body looks like. I have nept conj sun and i for the longest time had no concept of my own body type even today idk what it is. This placement indicate that you may fantasise alot about an ideal body type and may feel dejected if you dont achieve them or if someone tells you it is impossible, you cant handle it and will refuse to accept it. Delulu is the word yeah. Also sense of self may be weak here. Also very prone to falling for others words esp when they are related to their appearance. Blind to their own beauty.

🦢 pluto aspecting ascendant, venus, in libra, in taurus, in 7th house, in libra degrees of 7°,14°, taurus degrees of 2°,14°,26°, in 2nd house, aspecting 7th house, in 2nd house, in 1st house, in 8th house.

[ anything pluto touches becomes a point of obsession. Here pluto creates an intense need to transform. May make the native a bit obsessed with their appearance, become critical or simply wanting to keep working on it. May also make the native work on their appearance for sexual reasons and may fear being rejected sexually because of their body. May also have intimacy issues. People may be obsessed with your appearance and they may hate on you. People may view you in a sexual manner. Women may be more prone to picking on you. But the thing is,,,, this obsession is not always outright, it can be very secretive as pluto and 8th house also govern secrets. You may feel like covering up your body more and not wanting to be in the spotlight. Early knowledge of being sexualised and also introduced to sexual aspects very early on too. May bring out insecurities in others. You may be far more critical of your appearance . You may also be more critical of your ass and genitilia. They may be darker than the rest of your body which may make you insecure.

I have venus square pluto and i had already mentioned it my prev. Observation but i had people i didnt know sexualise me and i had a "friend" who told me that she was scared ill "take" her 🤡married crush🤡 away because of appearance. Yes. Married crush who i never spoke to or knew about before she started🤡 talking to me about him.

I also had another "friend" mock me for wearing makeup who i very quickly shut down by sharing some youtube makeup tutorials on her number and telling her to learn from them.]

🦢uranus aspecting ascendant harshly.

[You may love your appearance one day and hate it the next day. You may have features that stand out alot and " ruin the balance" in your face which is not true. You may also prioritise your mind over your body for most parts.]

🦢venus in aqua, cap, pisces, scorpio

[May make you critical, delulu and obsessive about your appearance.

I have pisces venus and i hate feet. Im sorry. Im not trying to kink shame but i hate my feet and others too. And i know another pisces venus who feels insecure when she looks at other people's feet. Esp women's feet. ]

🦢chiron aspecting venus, asc, 1st house, 7th house, 2nd house, in libra degrees, in taurus degrees, in libra, taurus, in aspecting 1st house, 2nd house, 7th house, 8th house.

[These placements may give pain in lower back areas, relationships that teach you a lesson, become more critical of your aptearance, biggest pain could come from appearance or romantic partners. Also your crushes may reject you or you may feel rejected by them. One of those placements where their crush goes "ewwww" when shipped with them. (Same can happen in saturn aspects too.)] Also back archs may be a pain in the ass for you. Idk why i said that. Intimacy may also be a huge pain for you you. You may fear intimacy and acts like sex.

🦢beauty asteroids in harsh aspects like aphrodite etc

May make a person insecure about their appearance and not see their beauty at all.

🦢nessus aspecting venus, 7th house 2nd house, in those houses, in libra degrees, in taurus degrees

Like i had said in previous obs, nessus is where tou are abused and where you abuse. It is where you get picked on. Your romantic partners may pick on you. They may also sexually pick on you.

🦢saturn in 4th house, in cancer, aspects to moon, in cancerian degres, libra degrees, taurus degres

May make a person fear "losing" their boobs, may make you critical of your boobs, also make you have issues with feelings and intimacy romantic and sexual moments. Love hate relationship with your boobs. May also create issues with femininity.

Like i have moon conj my saturn and i fear losing my boobs as i admire them the most but i also fear losing them if i lose weight and i also hate them sometimes cause i cant wear some tops without feeling like a young medieval woman with a needy baby who's husband has eloped with another woman and now she has to seduce an old man to get by. Omg.

🦢Venus in 6th house, 12th house, virgo venus, virgo rising

May make the native feel as if theyre not that pretty, or eye catching. It may make the person feel like people overlook them and ignore them or they are not remembered alot. May also make the native dress up more modestly or connservatively. May make the native feel bland. May make them seek perfectionism. May also feel the best when OTHERS compliment them and may dress up for public acceptance and approval.

I have it and there are days when i feel like a medieval maid. I also feel like i dont have features that make me unique or stand out. I feel bland. Like wheat.

Alsooo bonus obv i feel like 2nd house stellium or taurus stellium tends to make a person resemble a bull. Its their nose idk why.

[makeitmingi]

Empty Promises

Genre: Romance, Angst, Violence, Sad, Forbidden love (?)

Pairing: Mingi x Reader (y/n)

Characters: Doctor!Reader, Gangster!Mingi. Mentions of Gangster!Ateez

Summary: Mingi has resigned to his fate that he brings misery and misfortune to those around him. So he isolates himself and lives his life, playing with the possibility of not waking up tomorrow. Until he meets a doctor that is determined to heal all his wounds. But all Mingi wants to do is spare her of his ill fate.

Word count: 3.9K

Story warning(s): Mentions of su*cide, character death, depression, waiting/ longing for death, gang activity, hallucinations, smoking and other potentially triggering topics. This is heavy story which can be triggering for some readers. Please exercise your own discretion before and when reading.

With a small jolt, Mingi woke up. He let out a groan at the stiffness in his neck. This was the new normal for him, to wake up and feel like his body had been through the wringer. Swinging his legs over the side of the bed, he closed his eyes, swallowing and feeling how dry his throat was.

"Damn..." He leaned forward on his hand. As much as he wanted to stay in bed for the rest of the day, he forced himself to stand up. He grabbed his cardigan and pulled it over his shoulders.

"Mingi, you're not in any condition to go out." The oldest of the gang, Seonghwa, stopped him in his tracks. Mingi grimaced and chewed on his bottom lip.

"I won't be back for dinner." Was all Mingi said before he left the mansion.

As Mingi sat in his car, he made no move to start the engine. He felt the dull ache in his sinuses and leaned against the steering wheel.

There it was, the throbbing in his head.

Finally, he broke out of his thoughts just to start the engine. He pulled out of the driveway and drove. There was no need for any navigation, Mingi knew where he was going.

He drove past all the skyscrapers and office buildings of Seoul until they disappeared behind him and soon, all the Mingi could see out his window were tall fields of grass and wheat. Due to the drier winter air, they were a light brown instead of their usual lush green.

Mingi rolled down his window to let the cold winter air in. It was crisp but the speed of the car made it feel like it was cutting his skin.

"Do you have to open the window? It's freezing!" He turned to the passenger seat, seeing the tall male smile back at him.

"It's not that cold." Mingi rolled his eyes.

"Because you're wearing a cardigan." The male scoff in reply but made no further protest to make Mingi roll up his window. He was usually the 'kinder' one, giving into what Mingi wants.

"You don't have to be so self sacrificial all that time, Yun." Mingi grumbled, bringing his window up halfway.

"I'm fine giving in to you." He chuckled with a shrug.

Mingi let out a small scoff but continued to drive until he reached his destination. From the gap in his window, he could hear the gravel crunching under his tires.

"What are you waiting for?"

"I... don't know..." Mingi replied, leaning back into the driver's seat with a slump, a soft sigh escaping his lips. What was there to be afraid of? But honestly, Mingi didn't know if what he was feeling was fear or something else.

But his stomach sank, his chest tightened and he felt like there were nails in his throat. If that wasn't fear, what was it?

Taking a deep breath, Mingi opened the door and stepped out. The gravel and debris crunched loudly under his feet as he approached the structure before him.

"The weather is nice, isn't it?" Mingi turned his head, seeing the taller male stretch his arms out, taking a deep breath.

"No. It isn't." Mingi replied with his jaw clenched.

"Then why did you come out, silly? Should have just stayed indoors." The male smiled, staring at the wood cabin in front of him. His smile was always so infectious and kind.

"Because of you, Yun. I'm here because of you." Mingi frowned slightly, feeling a familiar anger stew within him.

"Me? Why me?"

"Because you died here, Yun. You died here and left me. But everyday, I come back here to you." Mingi finally found it in him to say it out loud.

It wasn't perfect. The picture Mingi saw before him was only a snippet from his memory. The wood cabin wasn't comforting and warm, it was unrecognisable, half of it charred and burnt. There was no one beside him, his best friend wasn't there. And Mingi knew it because he saw his best friend get engulfed by the flames.

'In loving memory of Jeong Yunho'

A plaque had been erected by the front of the house. Mingi hated it, he hated the smiling photo Hongjoong chose of Yunho. It was like the photo was mocking him.

"Why did you have to die?" Mingi clenched his fists, asking what was left of the wood cabin.

This used to be their escape, long before they joined Ateez together. When they were teenagers, they used to hide here after school.

But now, the charred remains of it stands as a bitter memory. Every time he closed his eyes, he sees it on fire with Yunho standing in the middle of it all, a soft smile on his face as he bids Mingi goodbye.

Were their lives perfect? No, far from. But they made a pact, a promise, to stay by each other, to suffer together.

"I'll never believe you again." He glared up at the cabin.

Mingi wanted to hate Yunho, he really did, but he couldn't. If Yunho could abandon Mingi, Mingi could do that too, right? Wrong. Each time Mingi swore he would forget and get over Yunho, he would still wake up, get in his car and come back here.

With a soft sigh, he moved to sit on the front steps of the house. Or rather, what was left of it. The moment he placed his hand down to steady himself, he recoiled, feeling the ash stick to his palm.

"After a year, it's still as it was." Mingi sighed, wiping his palm against his thigh.

"Well, you could clean it up if you're so bothered."

"And then what? You'll suddenly come back to life?" Mingi snapped back at his hallucination of Yunho, who smiled back tauntingly at him. Mingi closed his eyes with a sigh.

God, he hated that smile now. That smile that could light up a room or make Mingi's day feel brighter. Yunho's signature, warm smile.

Ever since they were younger, Yunho was always the 'cheery' one while Mingi was seen as the 'broody' one, the black sheep. Mingi didn't really care about that. He'll be the broody, bad influence. He takes pride in the fact that he taught Yunho to let loose and have fun. And in return, Yunho's the one that bails Mingi out of trouble.

"I'm crazy, I'm talking to myself or worse, a hallucination." Mingi slapped his cheeks.

He was right, it was a hallucination. Because this cheery, happy Yunho was the 'old' Yunho. It wasn't the same Yunho that Mingi saw before he died.

Because when was the last time Mingi saw Yunho genuinely smile?

Ever since Yunho learnt about his brother's tragic death, he was never the same. His smile no longer reached his eyes.

Mingi witnessed Yunho's spark diminish into smoke. But did he do anything about it? No. Mingi chose to live in denial that his best friend's will to live was being etched away.

Maybe that's why his punishment was witnessing Yunho get engulfed by the flames.

The image mocked him, reminding him that he wasn't enough to save Yunho, that happiness didn't belong to him.

"It's all my fault, isn't it? And now I have to live with the punishment of it all." Mingi sighed, pressing his arms onto his knees as his head dropped. Life was cruel.

"Why is it your fault?"

"You were sick, Yun. And I didn't do anything about it. I still depended on you when you should have been depending on me... You always saved me and the one time you needed me to save you, I couldn't. I was selfish and drove you to your death." Mingi breathed out.

Maybe that's why Mingi keeps coming back. To remind himself that this was all his fault, that he drove his best friend to his death.

All he does it bring misery and hurt those around him.

"Bye, Yun." Mingi looked back at the house before getting back into his car. Looking up, he saw Yunho standing there, waving at him. Yunho would always go with him but Mingi will always leave alone.

"I'll see you soon, Mingi ah."

Those words were Yunho's last words to Mingi before he died. Mingi could barely hear it, the sound of his own yelling and heartbeat was too strong then, it echoed painfully in his ears.

"Get out of there! Jeong Yunho!" Mingi screamed, trying to run into the burning house but was held back by the other gang members.

"Come back here! Please!" He yelled until his screams were silent.

Mingi shut his eyes and slammed his fists against the steering wheel. A tear trailed down his cheek, which he harshly wiped away. Taking a shaky breath, Mingi started the car and quickly peeled out of the makeshift drive way with an empty promise that he's never going back there again.

However, deep down, Mingi knew this was part of his routine now. He won't move on, he can't.

And honestly, Mingi knew that his behaviour and disrespect would get him kicked out of Ateez sooner and later. He was waiting for them to kick him to the curb.

But their leader, Hongjoong, seemed to be able to put Mingi's life resignation to good use.

All the jobs that Mingi has been assigned to were the most violent and least merciful. Because he was numb; he didn't feel remose, regret and wouldn't complain if he got beaten up.

Because everytime Mingi got into a fight, he silently hoped that the enemies' hit would be the one that takes him out. But it never came.

Fate just hated him too much to give him an easy way out. And a part of Mingi was too prideful to take his own life.

"Work time." Mingi stopped outside of the warehouse for his first job of the day. He took a deep breath, brushing aside his wallowing feelings from mourning over Yunho's death. Reaching into the glove compartment, he took a cigarette out to smoke.

Mingi watched as the thin trails of smoke fade into the air. Was Yunho looking at the smoke wisp away when he died? Did the heat bring him comfort like a hug would?

When was the last time Mingi hugged Yunho?

Yunho always did the hugging because Mingi didn't think something like a hug could express how much Yunho meant to him.

"Tch." Mingi stepped out of the car, his cigarette hanging from the corner of his lips. Tucking his hands into his pockets, he walked into the warehouse.

-

"Good work today. And good luck." You and your team exchanged fist bumps with the team that was taking over the Emergency Department for the rest of the night.

"Hi, Nurse Kim. Can you help me check on the status of that grandpa that came in earlier? Lee Yuwon?" You asked the head nurse.

"Oh, Dr (y/l/n), I guess we've been so busy that you didn't see the update... I'm sorry but Mr Lee didn't make it off the table." The nurse informed with a sad look, pulling up the patient's records on a tablet and passing it over to you. You nodded and patted her on the shoulder before going to the lounge.

"Hey, you good?" Your colleague asked.

"Yeah, just one of my patients earlier. He was stable when I sent him up but I guess he didn't make it off the table." You frowned, reading the report.

"I'm sorry to hear that. But you know, it happens..." He wrapped an arm around your shoulders to hug you.

"Yeah. He was just different... He was so nice and compassionate." You sighed.

"I get it." He nodded. You both put your coats in your lockers and you returned the tablet to the nurses' station as you were heading out for the night. Standing at the hospital entrance, you took a deep breath.

The exhaustion of being a doctor is never easy. You can train physically but the mental and emotional stress never goes away. And it's true, you could save a thousand lives but the one that you didn't save will always get you.

But at the Emergency Department, you didn't have time to stop and mourn. It was constantly going, someone always needed you somewhere.

"Triple shot over ice, please." You ordered at the 24 hour cafe.

"Long night, doc?" The familiar barista asked. You nodded your head with a tired smile.

Usually, you had your coffee in the cafe, spending 2 hours to catch up on reports and paperwork. Something about doing all that home irked you. But tonight, something told you not to.

"Sorry, can I have my order to go instead?" You called out. The barista gave you a thumbs up and poured your coffee into a to go cup.

"Have a nice day." She smiled and handed you your cup.

"You too." With your cold, bitter coffee in hand, you made your way home. For some reason, as your apartment came to view, you felt your heart rate begin to pick up. Suddenly, it was like you couldn't breathe. You didn't know what this feeling was, some sort of twisted anticipation of sorts.

"Work is done. It's time to rest." You told yourself with a slow exhale, taking a sip of the coffee. The bitterness and suddenly intake of caffeine was felt in your bones.

It was a long day.

Trudging up the stairs, you headed to the third floor where your apartment was. You stopped in the hallway, a sigh leaving your lips.

Once you got your front door opened, you dropped your bag on the arm chair and went to put your coffee on the counter, along with the stack of folders you were carrying in your arms.

"Do you need help coming in?" You asked, realising your front door was still open.

"No..." The deep, gruff voice groaned from the hallway outside.

You moved to your office to get your usual equipment as you heard the front door close. No matter his condition, he always would close the door and lock it behind him, you never knew why. Then he'll sit on the couch and wait for you.

When you came out of the room, you saw his lanky figure laid out on the couch. You pulled your medicine cart with you, something you got with how many times this has happened.

"Let me clean these first." You spoke softly. His eyes were still closed, not acknowledging or replying you.

The first thing you did was clean his superficial face wounds. He didn't look like he was bleeding anywhere else so the rest could wait.

There was a gash on his cheek and a bruise by his mouth. You were gentle, carefully watching for any reactions of discomfort on his face. Any eyebrow crease or nose wrinkle.

"Sorry." You whispered when you saw his eyebrows press together.

But once again, he didn't say anything. He didn't even suck in a breath of pain, nothing.

"Could you... your shirt..." You still never knew how to ask him to lift his shirt. But he grunted, pushing himself to sit up slightly to raise his shirt. There was some bruising on his ribs, that was normal. You began to percuse and listen with your stethescope. Then you gently felt around his ribs.

"I... I need to tape your ribs... They're broken... After that, eat these painkillers." He never understood why you bothered to explain to him these medical things.

He heard you put two pills into the small cup then you rummaged around your little medical cart to find the tape. You gently applied it on.

He was used to this. You just did your doctor thing and he never moved, questioned or doubted what you did. He appreciated that you never tried to make small talk.

Until he heard you sniffle.

Mingi opened his eyes to see tears lining your eyes, a small frown on your face as you tried to focus on finishing taping up his ribs.

He has never seen you cry before. For some reason, you looked so beautiful and precious. But at the same time, Mingi's chest tighten seeing you cry.

"I'm so-" Your voice was shaky, you were really trying your best to hold it together. You moved to wipe your face but he grasped your wrist in his hand, stopping your movements.

When you looked up at him with such sad eyes, he couldn't help it and caved into his desires. His other hand came up to hold your cheek, wiping away as many tears as he could with his thumb. You leaned into his touch as you wept softly.

Mingi didn't say anything as his eyes searched yours. Then he guided your head to his shoulder.

As you cried into your shoulder, his hand came to rest on the back of your head. Even if he didn't say anything, he brought you such comfort and warmth.

You didn't understand why. You didn't understand him.

You spent every single day, trying to help people escape death. Whereas it seems like he seeks death out on purpose.

Maybe you should yell at him, scold him, hate him, for being so reckless. But you couldn't. He just shows up at your door, beaten up and each time, you let him in, trying your best to heal his wounds.

Only for him to show up again, after days, weeks or even months, to repeat the whole ordeal again.

You asked yourself what's the point in fixing something that'll always come back broken?

But at some point where you found yourself missing him, even if you barely interact because Mingi never spoke unless it was necessary. The two of you never made an attempt to get to know each other more. However, with how Mingi shows up at your place, maybe it was best you didn't know.

Time seemed to stop as you leaned into Mingi's embrace. He held you for as long as you needed. He didn't push you away, he didn't tighten his hold.

You didn't realise how time had past until you fell asleep in Mingi's hold. If he wasn't injured, Mingi would have carried you to bed.

Although, Mingi didn't mind this. Yes, you smelt like antiseptic but he didn't mind.

A part of him wanted to stay like this forever. But he knew he couldn't, he wouldn't do that to you. So for now, Mingi would just indulge, be selfish and live this delusion.

He pressed his head against yours and closed his eyes. And for the first time in a long time, Mingi was able to peacefully fall asleep.

Mingi was irresponsible and reckless with his own life. However, he wouldn't be that way with you. When it came to you, he was more careful and cautious. Of course, he knows that he shouldn't here, possibly putting you in danger. He couldn't help it.

Why does he lock the door after he comes in?

In case he wasn't in the condition to protect you if there was a home invasion. You would always be so quick to try and fix his wounds, you won't even think to lock the door behind him.

An enemy could have followed him to your place and you wouldn't be the wiser. He won't risk that.

Deep down, he knew you were so different from him, you didn't belong in his world.

And Mingi was constantly reminded of it. The awards, certificates and other accolades that lined your walls. That was your world, the high achieving world where you had dreams and goals.

He was the opposite. He never sought to achieve anything in life. There was no dream, no end goal.

You flew high while Mingi stayed low.

The last time Mingi saw someone so full of life, it was Yunho. The Yunho that Mingi grew up with. Maybe that's why Mingi was so drawn to you, you were the reminder of what Yunho was like with a kind heart and warm smile. Right before he found out his beloved brother died. Then it all came crashing down.

The day Yunho's brother died, many things died along with him. Yunho's strive died, his will to live died and his friendship with Mingi died too.

Mingi saw his best friend's spirit wither away, leaving just a shell of the person he once was.

And one day, he just went missing. But Mingi always knew where Yunho disappeared to.

His car pulled up to their beloved hiding spot, a smile on his face at the thought of finding and greeting his best friend after a whole day of them being apart from one another.

Until Mingi saw the sparks and he was pushed back by the roar of the flames, the heat prickling his cheeks.

And that was the last time Mingi genuinely smiled.

He still wishes the rest of Ateez didn't tag along with him that day. Then there would be no one to stop him from rushing into the fire. To tie his fate to Yunho's.

Because if Yunho came out of the fire alive, Mingi would follow him. If Yunho perished, Mingi would gladly perish alongside him.

But then again, the universe put you in front of Mingi. Or maybe it was Yunho that sent you to him. And if this was a second chance, Mingi doesn't want to take it. He wants to distance himself from it, knowing that he can never have happiness.

After watching Yunho's spirit die, he didn't want to stick around and witness the same thing happen to you.

He knows it'll happen. He knows that all he'll do is bring you down with him because that's all he does. He'll destroy himself but he won't destroy you.

So, when Mingi woke up because of the sunrise, he looked down at your still sleeping form. He carefully moved his body away and laid you down on the couch, draping the throw blanket over your body.

For a few seconds, he stood over your sleeping form, admiring you.

Seeing you sleep so peacefully brought Mingi some sort of peace too.

Reaching over, he downed the painkillers you prepared. He knew that you'll probably worry if you saw them uneaten because you usually fret about whether his wounds were healing properly.

But he didn't want you to worry about him or even think about him. You shouldn't be occupying yourself with him.

Because Mingi knows that his wounds will never heal, no matter how hard you try.

Maybe even before Yunho's death, Mingi was already broken. He just lived in denial with his best friend that was so full of life. Then, Yunho's death broke the fever dream waking Mingi up to the reality that he was destined to be alone. There was nothing for him, no hope, no future.

And he was fine with that, that's the life he was meant to lead until something eventually kills him.

So, against his own heart, he forced himself to tear away from you and leave to head back to his own home. And once again, with the sun rising, the daily cycle repeats itself.

And as Mingi walked away from your apartment, he made yet another empty promise that he'll never come back again.

~

Masterlist

[fictionalmenxyn]

Ok so this is totally stupid and silly but can I get head cannons for 141, Alejandro, Rudy and Konig if you write for them with a reader insisting they can pick them (the character) up and you can chose if they fail at it or succeed, thank you if you do this btw :3

This isn’t stupid or silly it’s good! Never feel embarrassed or awkward of anything you’d like to see me write I love cool and quirky concepts it makes it more fun to write! And of course I can do this for you and others to read. Have a good day/night

Ghost

Feeling like he’d do it for a workout or something

Like he’s about to do sit ups and your sat either watching him and counting or your on your phone

And he randomly told you to get on his back and obviously with his huge muscular structure you wouldn’t say no

You sat on his back as he did push ups

Or he’d tell you to bear hug his back and wrap your legs around his hips so he can do weighted pull ups

He definitely can pick you up with ease

If you have your utility vest on and your almost about to get into a fight or your arguing with Soap as he finds it funny when you angry

He just grabs both of the shoulder parts and pick you up like your a 5kg dumbbell

Soap

Does it probably as a joke

He would make sure your by a sofa and he’d sling you over his shoulder and drop you onto the sofa (my brother did that when I was younger does anyone else’s do it too?😂😂)

Yeah he’d drop you them probably get straight into play fighting

Or he’d pick you up in a hug type of way

He’d bear hug you and pick you up and at the same time squeeze you

Sometimes it’s like going to a chiropractor when he squeezes it makes your back crack not to hard though

He definitely does the sofa thing when your about to watch a movie like when your about to watch something and your going to sit down he just does that. Hopefully you don’t have popcorn or any drink in your hand

Or when your about to sit down as he tend to wind you up

Gaz

Definitely a wind up!!

If your just standing and talking to someone he’d just pick you up from behind and and tickle your sides

Or he’d do it to move your out of the way

He knows that if your into him putting his hands on your hips he’ll do it in any way shape or form

He’ll need something or wants to get past he places his hand on your sides and pick you up a little

It makes your head rush and cheeks flushed

Sometimes like soap he’ll throw you onto the sofa for a laugh and wind up

But he fails at holding you for a long period of time not because of weight but his grip isn’t the best as he uses your belt loops to pick you up usually

Price

Like soap he’ll do it as a hug

But other times he’d do it cause you ask him to maybe grab something or you just enjoy it. Possibly so you could give him a kiss or something whatever you want to think of it as

When he hugs he’ll pick you up maybe sometimes to place you on a table or counter so your almost the same height or at the same eye level

When he can he’ll give you a hug and pick you up

If something is good that caused him to have a good day and mood he’d hug you and spin you a little as if you like a kid or you’ve both just met up after a year long holiday

Although you enjoy when he picks you up he actually loves it to but doesn’t say it

But deep down you both know he enjoys it as much as you

He knows that you love it so it makes him happy cause he knows you are

Alejandro

Feel like he’ll poke your sides as a tickle then picks you up as like a greeting or like smile fun

He can be like Ghost when it comes to gym

If your gym is shut or you both can’t go out as something has popped up or whatever and you both have to make a gym in your garage/garden/spare room

Then he’ll use you instead of weights if you don’t have any but he does it on purpose most times as you find it attractive

Lifts you up easy but it’s not like Ghost where he can lift you above his shoulders or head

Feel like as a human isn’t physically capable of staying as stiff as a board and easy to hold it’s a bit difficult for him to hold you above his shoulder and head

He loves it though he likes how it’s helping him stay fit yet keeping you entertained the whole time

But yes he is able to lift you just to a certain extent

Rudy

He probably could lift you but chooses not to

He feels like it isn’t the best way to show his love and he feels like it wouldn’t be that comfortable

He loves hugging and such just not licking you up

He most likely could but he appreciates if both of your feet are on the ground

He does this because before when he was younger his friends were doing it to see how strong they are and when they lifted him

He wasn’t a fan and he felt uncomfortable so he knows what it’s like and doesn’t feel fondly of picking you or anyone up

The only way he’ll pick you up is with cheesy pick up lines or jokes

Like said before he can but won’t he likes to hug and kiss you not picking you up

König

With ease!!

This man is a strong giant of course he can

He’ll ask if your comfortable with it if he did it without telling you so like a surprise attack and he tickled you after

If you like it he’ll do it more often as he knows you like it

One time you were both on a walk and this dog wouldn’t leave you alone and kept sniffing you and you weren’t liking it (weighed your allergic or don’t like dogs)

So with ease he picked you up and placed you on his back like a piggy back ride

But if it’s a big dog and can still reach he’d put you on his shoulders

He loves to pick you up cause you can be eye level with him so you two can kiss or stare into each others eyes. He likes it also because he can watch as your smile grew knowing you knew who was picking you up as it was a thing just between you two

[meanbossart]

Hey! I was thinking of trying to write something for you about DU Drow but after a trying to gather stuff about him via your page I’m struggling to get something substantial for his personality- like I get it mostly (I think?) but it’s hard to put into words (which makes it easier for me) so if it’s not too much to ask; how would you explain DU Drows personality and maybe some of his values? - if you don’t mind! I love your art BTW!

Man, this is a tough ask and I MADE the guy. The fic is definitely the best place to see his personality in action, but it is also 20 chapters long so far - and I'm a fairly reasonable man.

Before I get to any descriptions, there's two important things to note: A) Overwhelmingly, his looks do not match his demeanor. and B) DU drow is extremely hedonistic in practice. He might claim to have certain beliefs or standards but hardly ever practices them.

Anyways, I present to you: The guy, more-or-less summarized to the best of my abilities.

BEHAVIOR: Purposefully standoffish. He wants to be noticed, but he does not want to be bothered. He's a little bit stiff with his body language and mostly makes use of head/neck gestures to assert his sentences and signal his level of interest. On that note, me makes it extremely obvious for the socially-versed individual to tell what he thinks of them - he hardly ever tries to hide if he's disinterested, annoyed, or having a laugh at your expense. He expresses emotion through his face a normal amount, but his default look is eerily bland, and subtle emotions might go unnoticed because of his eye-color and thin brows.

As it is with most people, the more uncomfortable he is with a situation the more stiff and inexpressive he becomes, and vice versa.

SPEECH: DU drow is very much well spoken, and simultaneously very blunt. He abides by most conversational formalities (definitely more formal than you would assume him to be) and basic etiquette. He will greet you and he will say please and thank you even if clearly not meaning it or feeling like you're unworthy of the gesture. Sometimes, he does it just to be patronizing.

With all of that in mind, he has a tendency to use violent turns of phrase and analogies to express himself, this applies to both negative and positive feelings. That being said he's aware of social norma and knows full well when things are or aren't appropriate, even if sometimes he chooses to ignore that and be weird anyway - usually with the purpose of intimidation.

He is the most earnest and sincere with very close friends (quite literally only Astarion and Shadowheart) and rather curt with everyone else unless you catch him in a particularly good mood. He's a little chummier with dwarves and duergar (he finds them amusing and fun to hang out with) and reserves a slight bit more tenderness and kindness for children and mothers, especially if they're elves. He's also fond of animals. He is dismissive of gnomes, goblins, bugbears, half/full orcs and hobgoblins. He despises githyanki and drow. He treats humans fairly respectfully but thinks they are a far lesser race than pretty much all others.

He has a very dark/offensive sense of humor and a tendency to make well crafted, but cruel jokes or quips about sensitive topics. This goes for everybody, including people he's on good terms with.

VALUES: Here's where things get tricky. DU drow is both a hypocrite and a unreliable narrator of his own story, not to mention deeply unfamiliar with his own inner-workings and feelings. Politically, he would be the guy who doesn't vote, doesn't want to pay taxes and dreams of living off the grid, who thinks everybody should pull themselves up by the bootstraps and that it's a dog-eats-dog world. He hates systems of government, authority figures, hierarchical structures and archaic customs. He believes it would a chaotic but functional world if people governed themselves.

In practice, he doesn't stand for anything and gladly overlooks injustices and things that don't align with his supposed values as long as they favor him, or just don't get in his way, and easily makes exceptions for things on a whim. He's indifferent to slavery; unless it's Astarion's. - He thinks humans are a worthless pet-race, except for his dearest and nearest friend, the half-elf Shadowheart. He thinks Half-orcs are intellectually inferior, but he will gladly be chummy with them if they amuse him and make for good-company during a night-out.

INNER WORLD AND INTIMACY: DU drow is extremely unfamiliar with his own emotions and very often comes up empty when he has to justify or explain anything that is based on feeling, while simultaneously operating on impulse and instinct for the vast majority of the time. He is subject to fear, resentment, and insecurity as much as anyone else, but carries a deep shame in acknowledging his own vulnerability at all. He is very intense when it comes to love, however, and shows no reluctance in expressing it through his words and actions towards the people he cares about. He does care for the levels of comfort of those dearest to him though, and doesn't bombard them with it unless the moment is right, or if overwhelmed into doing so. The same applies to physical affection - he's extremely comfortable with it, but cares deeply for respecting the boundaries of his loved ones. When it comes to strangers, he only touches them outside of combat if there is some kind of power-game at play.

A couple of other things that might be of note:

-He likes creature comforts, but is also fine with going without them and won't ever complain about having to live, sleep, or survive in less-than-ideal circumstances as long as he feels in control of the situation. -He can be enticed by valuables and gold because they make the immediate future easier, but he doesn't seek a life of vast riches. -He is not an alcoholic but probably has a binge-drinking problem. -While he is fond and respectful of animals, he has no issues killing them if the situation calls for it. -He pretty much always believes himself to be the most impressive person in the room. -He is not a vain man, but very much likes the way that he looks and to have it be acknowledged by his partner. -He believes faith, religion, and gods to be a waste of time.

[lothcat-lothcat-lothwolf-run]

something about Kallus (born on Coruscant, currently living in a glorified hallway) seeing lothal for the first time. there’s grass! And mountains! And a lot of big empty space! The sky is so big! How? Is this possible??

but he’s not allowed to go near it. The local wildlife (there’s wildlife!! And it’s cute!!) are considered too much of a hassle. He doesn’t even get to feel the landscape rush by him when he’s in a speeder. No, he’s always inside, a sort of cage of his own making.

when he’s on the ice moon, it’s one of the first times he really feels the pull, the call that nature holds out to him. It’s cold and freezing and miserable, but it’s still something real. And zeb almost seems to embody it, a wild that cannot, will not be contained. He wants to push it away almost as much as he wants to embrace it. Embrace him.

when he gets back, the artificial lights hurt more than before. The walls seem to echo every footstep with a metallic clang. Every moment someone makes feels robotic, even the air feels stiff and rigid. He lays the meteorite down on the plasteel shelf, and the contrast between the two feels as loud as war. It somehow reminds him of himself.

When he turns off the lights, he could almost imagine the grass under him, the midnight breeze and the smell of flowers. As if that rock of unknown properties is a star, as seen from on a planet, not a ship. The mountains in his mind hold him close, and he whispers a name for the lone star. “Garazeb”

Kallus often wonders what atollon is like. Seeing it, being there would be selfish of him. How could he continue to serve from afar if he is close by? When he does get glimpses, it makes him long for the things he never knew. When the wind blows into you, does the sand travel with it and scrape your skin? What does the ground feel like when the sun warms it? The animals there, do they cry out when they fall asleep as he so often does? It’s perhaps one of the cruelest tortures that Thrawn inflicts on him. How he wants to be down there, alongside everyone and everything he’s never gotten the chance to hold.

The first thing he noticed about Yavin 4 was how the vines seem to snake up the side of whatever desolate structure the rebels are using as a base. They infiltrate the lines between the stone tiles that make up much of the landing zone. He asks zeb if he could touch one, just for a moment and is surprised when the lasat laughs. The plants feel warm to the touch, as if they were secretly a type of lizard who basks in the sun. There’s a corse grain underneath it all, a pattern and a rhythm, different than the strictness of the Empire. It flows, similar to a wave. It extends and encompasses the base, but still pulls back to shore. It reflects them all.

on lothal, he once again sees the grass ripple in the wind as the ship he spent years chasing returned home. he steps out of the ghost and into the infinite field, transported back to the moment he saw this place for the first time. And he loves it no less.

[charcoaldustonmyfingers]

Kinda oddly embarrassed to send this but oh my god your art is so pleasing to look at for some reason

I think it's just the soft shapes you use and how amazingly 3D everything tends to look?? Like the angles and proportions are just so perfect that I find it easy to imagine most of what you draw as a 3D model or something

And like I don't think I could nail it like you (maybe with time!!) But I am definitely taking inspiration from it because it DOES get me thinking about how you use shapes and angles and wonder if I could practice that because oh my god I wish I could absorb your art

Do you have methods or techniques to make it look so 3D? if you know what I mean? I tend to use grids to try and map out the shapes in a vaguely 3D plane, so I was wondering if you had tips kinda like that to share with the class? or if you're just winging it and it's a lot of practice?

Thank you so much!!! It really means a lot to me when others take inspiration from my art, it reminds me of all the artists I used to look up to and emulate when I was first starting out on MSPaint with a broken trackpad for a pen, you don’t have to be embarrassed! You’ll definitely be able to harness 3D space and create fantastic work, you’re already well on your way! Having passion and a desire to learn will take you far :)

My biggest focus whenever I draw is to make the characters feel real, as though you could reach out and enter the space they’re in to sit next to them on the couch. I’m so glad that I’m able to pull it off! Thanks for the rose, I’ll be sure to cherish it :)

As for my methods and techniques…

Drawing on a 3D grid plane is definitely something I do! Its perfect for comic panels or storyboards, to set the scene and ground characters or props to their environment.

I did a lot of classical study, that is life drawing and still life drawing, but simply using reference for buildings and anatomy also helps a lot and is a lot easier to find. I’d also sketch my hands, plastic animals, and my surroundings, as well as people watch for inspiration for character mannerisms or fashion. It’s useful to know a little bit about the inner workings of anatomy, as there are places were bone makes a person inflexible, while places with more muscle or fat are affected by things like gravity or pressure that change their shape. Drawing a flour sac to act out different emotions is a great way to practice weight and character acting!

Having studied animation, I did a lot of turnarounds to get characters consistent and able to be rotated in 3D space. It can be pretty tedious for some people, but it really does help solidify the characters’ shapes and design, and serves as great reference to look back on if you need it! If you don’t want to do something so stiff as a turnaround, simply drawing expressions and poses from dynamic angles helps too. I’ve found that breaking a character down into basic shapes that are easy to draw in a 3D plane also can help my anatomy and foreshortening be more accurate.

Most importantly, find something that brings you joy to draw! Every “traditional” method of study can be applied to things you like, so don’t feel the need to burn out thinking you can only draw the Mona Lisa or whatever. I’ve done anatomy studies on the Rise turtles to figure out their skeletal structure, and friends of mine have painted some mind blowing concept art inspired by Sonic and D&D!

I hope this helps some? Best of luck, and have fun! :D

Below are a couple of examples of some of my studies:

[teslacoils-and-hubris]

I think the longer a vampire has been alive, the less easily human affection should come to them.

Really play into them being a different species, you know? Vampires should show affection to other vampires in a way that alienates them from humanity. It's not uncommon for humans and vampires to catch feelings, it's how most new vampires are made of course. But the difference in affection can cause problems between the two, which is another driving force in vampires turning human partners.

Vampires mimicking human affection can set off a deeply ingrained fear response in humans. Handshakes that go on too long and too strong. Hugs that feel like being trapped. Kissing a vampire should feel like they're trying to bite you. They have to be so careful with humans, constantly reminding themselves that humans require a tender hand.

Vampires tend to be more... rough with each other. They're hardy creatures. They fight, roughhousing and biting, showing off their strength. It's good bonding and in a group helps keep the social structure sound. They can still be quite tender and sweet with each other, of course, but there's just no reason not to dig your claws into your friend when you can both heal super fast and can't die you know?

Feeding is also very important to vampire bonding. You see it with vampires biting their human partners, a huge show of trust on both sides, but sharing a victim is very intimate. Vampires are territorial, after all. Feeding from the same human is a big deal- vampires so rarely form groups or packs or covens.

So you'll forgive them if their hugs are a bit stiff and make you feel like a cornered animal. They're trying very hard not to playfully sink teeth into you in greeting because they're pretty sure that's rude in human society??

[kentopedia]

it's been decades since you've last seen dazai; your lover & your maker. now that you're finally happy, he's haunting you again with a thousand buried memories.

overall contents. fem!reader, nsfw minors dni, exes to lover, gothic romance, blood drinking, vampire!reader, vampire!dazai, smut, cheating reader, complicated relationships, blood, gore, jealousy, manipulation, religious symbolism, betrayal, reunions — currently at 21k words

PART I ♰ MASTERLIST

As another careful conversation progressed, you poured the tasteless champagne down your throat, the liquid far too much like sandy water.

It was the same, over, and over. The sentence structures were unchanged, never deviating from saying too much without saying anything at all. A practiced smile would follow, where lips perfectly curled upwards. Copied faces plastered onto the next, making it difficult to determine where one individual personality ended and the next began.

These were repeated games, you knew, and you maintained the politeness required of you, even as each curtsy felt stiff and robotic, each refined handshake felt dishonest and meaningless.

Still, you’d grown used to the monotony of this dull life. You tolerated it gladly, ignoring the continuous throb in the back of your mind that grated at you, reminding you that things hadn’t always been this way.

Quietly, you shoved that small voice away. If all of the pomp and circumstance meant you’d feel normal, you’d gladly put on a show and pretend you belonged there.

The woman that stood before you continued her monologue, her dark eyes bright enough to match her elated smile. Her lips were a red, distracting and perfectly lined with the kind of makeup you were certain was far outside her budget. Though her cheeks were powdered and bright, you noticed the beginnings of lines on her young skin, the signs of a life more taxing than she let on.

You’d forgotten her name already. Too many people had introduced themselves to you this evening, and you hadn’t had the patience or interest to remember them. It was unlikely you’d see most of the guests again, after all.

“Congratulations,” the woman said, squeezing your wrist like you’d once played together on the playground. You cringed, wondering if she’d say anything about the iciness of your skin, though it was almost indiscernible with your satin glove as a cover. “I had a feeling you two were going to get engaged soon, but I had no idea when he would pop the question.”

You traded her an indulgent smile, nodding along as you tried not to let all of the conversation float right over your head. Somewhere in the past few decades, you’d lost interest in the faux interactions that events of this grandeur yielded. Everyone was merely putting on their best act, fitting in with those that they deemed superior to them in every way.

In truth, your engagement party was never supposed to reach this scale. Somewhere in between a few close friends, half the city had been invited. It was alarming to see so many unfamiliar faces in a celebration that was supposed to be entirely for you and your new fiancée.

“Thank you,” you said smoothly as Atsushi nudged you gracefully, probably wondering if you’d been ignoring all his friends that evening.

You had… but you felt bad telling him that and would never admit to it. The engagement ball had been his idea, and while you were vehemently against it, you’d indulged him in his innocent excitement. After a life that you’d lived to the fullest, Atsushi seemed to think he had something to prove when it came to loving you.

You just wanted to be with him, plain and simple. There was no need for all the theatrics.

“I’m surprised you invited so many people, Atsushi,” the woman continued, and you’d wished you’d paid attention when she told you her name. She was one of Atsushi’s co-workers, after all. He’d be upset with you if you forgot everyone that he introduced you to. “You’re not usually that type of person.”

Atsushi flushed, and he darted his eyes away bashfully. “It wasn’t my intention for so many guests to be here. Someone got a bit carried away with the invitations.” His thought trailed off, and he diverted to the story of how the elaborate affair had been conceived. Atsushi was the friend of a wealthy agency president’s son, who had offered to organize the event for you. Predictably, he went completely overboard, and now appeared to be having more fun than either you or Atsushi.

Atsushi spun that particular tale with passionate amusement, and you let your eyes wander, hoping to spot a singular face that you were familiar with. If you stood by your fiancée with nothing to say any longer, you weren’t sure you’d make it to the end of the night.

Across the room, a couple of your neighbors huddled in a circle of gossip. You considered speaking to them, if only to entertain yourself, but their husbands were horrendously awful, you didn’t think you could stomach it.

The rest of Atsushi’s co-workers shared hors d'oeuvres and a polite conversation away from the societal elites. On the left side of the floor, the woman who tailored your clothes spoke with another young girl you’d never seen before. A baker from down the street drowned himself in a glass of champagne, looking so dreadfully lonely that you weren’t sure how he’d gotten into the party at all.

You frowned inwards, realizing that while you recognized many of these people, they were more Atsushi’s friends than your own. These were people who greeted him every night on the street, passing their eyes over you like you were just another midnight fling, not the woman he’d been with for nearly two years.

There were too many strangers here to celebrate a marriage they felt nothing about. The superficiality of the situation left a bitter taste in your mouth, and you, very quickly, felt like an outcast at your own party.

You played with the chain around your neck, glancing from person to person. Atsushi, beside you, carried on his conversation, every so often throwing in a word about his work. You were listening half-heartedly, still trying to decide if this was worth all the trouble, or if you should give up on the niceties and head home early.

Someone behind you laughed.

The noise caught your notice because of how achingly familiar it was, how eerie, even. It was cynical and sharp, almost a snort of air that had been released on an accidental exhale. Still, you could hear the genuine amusement in it, a gratitude that came with being able to have something to laugh about.

You shuddered, your body unwillingly reacting as you turned to see who had been loud enough to draw your attention, to stand out amongst a sea of disinteresting people and intolerable voices.

In the corner, the man stood with an aligned spine, every muscle taut to hold himself up. His dark hair was grown out, but every strand remained smooth and healthy, falling over his forehead in loose waves that were glossy in the candlelight. He was caught in a conversation with another, twirling a glass of wine between his fingers, disgustingly captivated by the individual before him.

There was something too recognizable about him for comfort. The shadowed outline of his silhouette was the ghost of a memory, and you were left gawking at a person that you might not even recognize once he turned.

Swallowing, you tried to avert your gaze more subtly as he began to shift his position. He’d noticed you watching him, and he peered over his shoulder, in the fraction of a moment, to catch your eye.

His features were unmistakable.

Your glass slipped from your hands, shattering into a hundred tiny shards on the marble floor. It shushed the room as you maneuvered clumsily to hide away behind Atsushi. From head to foot, you had gone stiff, your body colder than it ever had been, even when you were on the brink of death, before the bliss of sweet blood had ventured down your throat, a memory you’d tucked far away.

You’d long since given up on praying, but you thought about it, just this once, in the hopes he hadn’t recognized you.

Which was a ridiculous concept, really. The memory of him was as fresh in your mind as every bit of yesterday was. He was as likely to forget the image of you as he was his own name, even if you did your makeup differently, if your clothes had changed from how they’d once been.

He’d come here with a purpose—that was the only thing that made sense—and it certainly would have something to do with you. The undeniable acknowledgement sent another wave of nausea through your gut, and you tried to remember what it was like to breathe.  

“Honey?” Atsushi asked, concerned, his voice bringing you back to the present. His hand was on your lower back, wide eyes full of an anxiety you often saw reflected back at you. “Is everything alright?”

“I’m fine,” you said, clutching your hands to your sides to calm yourself. If you didn’t turn around, maybe he’d go away. Maybe he was just an illusion. One way or another, you needed to be free of him. “I just need to get some fresh air. I’ll be alright.”

It was then that you realized that almost everyone’s eyes were on you, and while some stared back at you with pity, some began snickering under their breaths at the darkened stains on the bottom of your gown. You ignored them, trying not to feel the burning observation against your back, trapping you.

If you left, he was certain to follow.

You stepped away from Atsushi, and his hand reached out to you, before retracting, falling. “Are you sure?” He followed your every movement. “You seem—”

“Yes.” You smiled at him placatingly, hoping no one else could hear you. You didn’t want them to be concerned—least of all, Atsushi. It had nothing to do with your engagement, and you were afraid it appeared that way. “I’ll be right back.”

Atsushi seemed to understand after that, shifting his attention to his friends warmly, as he attempted to diffuse the tension. If anything, he knew that you had no desire to cause a scene and relented to your wishes, drawing everyone’s focus off of you. “Alright. I’ll wait here.”

He’d always been steadfast in his understanding. It was one of the reasons that you had fallen for him in the first place.

You nodded and said goodbye to the dark-haired woman before escaping from the ballroom, hoping you could find a room to hide in. Once your feet started moving, they didn’t stop, carrying you throughout the manor in a desperate search for the closest escape route. There were too many doors in the house, a multitude of bedrooms that weren’t needed at all.

As you weaved your way through the halls, you ran into a few couples caught in a salacious embrace, blocking each of the rooms that had once been private. They shouted at you, and you slammed the door uncomfortably, having no desire to intrude on their secretive affairs.

You couldn’t remember what it was like to be sick, to expel every last fluid from your stomach, but you were certain it resembled whatever you were feeling now. Foreboding dread had come to cripple you in every sense of the word, gripping you tightly in the vice of panic.

Finally, you reached an empty bedroom, one with a balcony that overlooked nothing but the gardens. It was a beautiful night, and the dark sky calmed you, bringing you back to the present, pulling you away from memories that you had shoved deep into the pits of your soul, burying them under lock and key.

There was a dreamy hue over the garden, illuminated by the candles and lamps outside. For just a moment, you basked in the serene lighting, the calmness of the evening away from all the guests. The music inside was but a faint whisper, the orchestra stumbling their way back into a tune after you’d escaped the ball less than dramatically.

Inhaling through your nose, you stilled your mind, and waited for the peace to end.

You felt his presence behind you before you heard him, those sharp eyes on you like daggers along your back. He moved silently, gracefully, like he was floating above the floor and not even there at all.

You curled your hands into a fist, staring hard into the horizon as your nails broke the skin of your palm. He’d be the first one to speak, as he always had been, and you’d get sucked into his alluring features, letting yourself indulge as you knew you shouldn’t.

Closing your eyes, you waited for him to break the silence. To come up behind you and hover his touch over your skin. The fragrance of his skin got closer and closer, and you squeezed your eyes tighter, hating how much you’d missed him. That even when you despised him, a part of you still belonged in his possession.

“I’ve missed you, my angel.”

Five words were all it took. Your knees buckled under you, the voice you hadn’t heard in decades like a soothing lullaby from your childhood, a hymn you’d used to worship a god that had left you behind. Your knuckles turned pale as you squeezed the stone of the balcony barrier, just enough force to keep you on your feet.

His voice was never gentle, but for you, he plated his steely knife in rose-colored foil, softening the edges until it couldn’t cut too deep. The sound was exactly as it had always been; nostalgia had its teeth deep in you, before that cool wave of horror crashed over you, remembering who it was, exactly, that you were dealing with.

“Don’t call me that.” You grew stiff as you felt him drawing closer, pulling to you with every word. Within seconds, he was near enough to ghost a breath along your neck, merely a phantom sensation.

“Hm.” His fingers dipped along your shoulders, the blades between them, and you tilted your head away, refusing to gaze into those eyes. “You always did hate that, didn’t you?”

Against your better judgement, a part of you had lit on fire. You longed for him, even when it sickened you.

“Perhaps my lovely devil will suffice instead. You never could accept that you were the very killer I made you out to be.”

“I don’t care what you call me.” You stepped away until you were digging your flesh into the balcony guard, the stone cold as it pressed into your stomach. “I’m not yours anymore.”

“Can you say that while meeting my eyes?" Dazai laughed, and though the sound of it was acerbic and mocking, he stayed where he was. "Maybe I’ll believe you, then. You’ve always been so horrible at lying to me.”

You snarled, ready to slice your nails across his cheek and watch with satisfaction as the blood dripped to his chin.

The anger steeled you, made you think you’d be prepared to face him once more; surely the hatred for him outweighed your lasting weakness.

You turned, eyes narrowed, and though you continued to exhibit your antagonism, the sight of him was poison to your resolve.

Dazai was still as hauntingly beautiful as always, those deep eyes gleaming in the moonlight, watching you with a hint of amusement. His hair was styled as it had been a century ago, transcending lifetimes while he remained eternally twenty-two. He smiled, lips curling into a grim expression, all too delighted with the loose hold he still had over you.

You averted your gaze but stood your ground. “I hate you, Dazai.” You curled your arms around your chest, keeping the distance between you. “I always will.”

For all his confidence, Dazai’s expression momentarily fell, like he’d expected you to welcome him back with loving arms, grovel at his feet with apologies you didn’t mean. Then, the insincere smile was back, drawing you in with revolting sweetness. “I’ve searched for you for decades. I thought you were dead—”

“I don’t care.”

“—Only to find out you’d been running from me this entire time.” Dazai invaded your circle once more, and his fingers pinched your jaw, studying you raptly. There was just a foot of air between you, the cool heat exchanged in your breaths. You ignored every muscle in your body that was relying on memory, wishing to do all the things that it had once done. “Did those years together mean nothing? Were you not to be my everlasting companion?”

You swatted his hand away, a million little fires starting along every point where your skin met. But no matter how beautiful he was, how calm those saccharine words of his made you feel, you knew the mercilessness that he was capable of. “I never made that choice of my own volition. You took it away from me.”

His eyes flashed before he retracted, complacent. “I gave you what you asked for. A life more than the one you had. And then I gave you everything I had left to give.”

“Your apology means nothing to me. Get the hell out of here.” Your words lacked the bite that you’d wished for, not sure you had the courage to push him into a fight. His strength outweighed yours by centuries; you had enough sense not to challenge that.  

Dazai blinked, and then laughed, jeering, without any sense of real humor. “You misunderstand. I’m not apologizing.” He tucked a hand back into his coat, regarding you with serious disdain as he sunk back, the outline of his dark clothes blending with the evening. “I never regretted the decision I made that night.”

You stared at him, blinking, before retracting and matching his heartless laugh with one of your own.

It was as if you’d never been parted at all. The unpleasant decades thinned into one small period, an insignificant point in time that, now, seemed nothing more than a development to your character. “Fine. I’ve got nothing to say to you, Dazai. I wanted to be rid of you, and I was. Your insincere words don’t matter to me anymore.”

His jaw tightened, and you stared each other down, searching for any glimpse of the familiar figure you’d used to love. Undeniably, he was there. Those eyes of his were just the same. The soft words he used for you and only you had never changed.

Yet, just as those sweet parts of him were as comforting as ever, the ugly parts of him were there as well. You remembered his cruelty, his gift of manipulation, and you pushed him away, never again wanting to be strung in that web.

Dazai did nothing but blink as you withdrew, standing straight, pulled taut by a marionette cord. “Is this the life you intend to live now? This half-hearted existence where you befriend mortals that will wither without you, to be engaged to a man you will never spend eternity with? Pitiful, really.”

For just a moment, you’d been so caught up in Dazai that the man who’d loved you with all of his heart had vanished into the atmosphere. It was as if, somehow, you’d forgotten that Atsushi was there at all.

Guilt overwhelmed you.

That man, the sweet, kind man who had become your saving grace, was at risk because of your carelessness. Dazai was too smart not to have taken cautious measures, and you knew he’d learned everything there was to know about your life before intervening.

It made sense why he’d appeared now of all times. It was the perfect opportunity to ruin everything you’d loved for good, reducing you to the whimpering mess that had accepted him in the first place.

He'd made you; he’d known you; he’d loved you for decades. If anyone knew how to break you, it was Dazai Osamu, and that was the thing that scared you the most.  

“I fully intend to turn him,” you said, hating the way your voice broke on a singular syllable, making you seem uncertain of the decision you’d made nearly a year ago. “Though I appreciate your concern. I’ll be perfectly happy this way.”

The comment didn’t faze Dazai, who grinned, his eyes burning with a fire you’d never forget, a sort of glee that only transpired from evil. “I should kill him before that happens, shouldn’t I?” His teeth gleamed in the candlelight, two long fangs slipping over his lips with threatening causality. The points were even more severe in the lighting. “I’ll be sure to savor in the taste as I rip his throat out.”

The image was sickening, a gruesome thought that made your old panic reignite. You schooled your lips into nothing but a line, knowing that Dazai could detect even the smallest change in your features.

“Honestly, I’m surprised you’ve managed to control yourself so well.” He went on, mocking you with every second that passed. “After three years, did I hear? I admit, I was having trouble listening over the band.” He tilted his head, studying you, searching deep into your consciousness for an answer that would satiate him. “You’ve never been able to resist your hunger before. What changed?”

You knew better than to underestimate him and stood taller.

“I’m not the same person I was when I was with you, and I never want to be her again.” You closed your eyes, looking away.

“This isn’t the life I envisioned for you a century ago.”

“My life is not yours to craft. I’m not some doll you can bend to your will.” Finally, you reached out to him, wrapping your hands around his own. His skin was cold, dead, void of any blush from the stolen blood in his veins. You were one word away from begging, pleading with him, even as you stood your ground. “Just don't kill him, Osamu. I’d never forgive you, and that’s what you want, isn’t it? You want me to come back to you.”

The scowl twitched ever-so-slightly as something in his eyes flashed. His name on your lips had always been his greatest weakness, and you could see him thinking hard. “For once, my love, you’re wrong. That’s not what I came here for.”

You stared, puzzled, before dropping his hand and frowning. “Then what are you here for?”

“I was looking for you, yes,” he admitted with a one-shoulder shrug. “I’ve been looking for you for years, and it is by mere coincidence that I found you here.” A cheer sounded inside the house from a toast. You wished that you were in there, warm, where all of this was but a nightmare. “As happy as I am to see that you’re alive and well, I refuse to compete with someone who turns you into everything you are not. If you’re so much happier without me, then who am I to stand in the way?”

“I’m supposed to believe that?” you scoffed.

You’d be a fool to believe that was any more than an obvious lie, that Dazai’s motives were pure of heart. He had never been loud about his jealousy, but he’d killed every lover you’d ever dared to take, leaving you alone with no one but him for comfort.

Dazai had always refused you even one outlet of happiness, even when he’d had other lovers of his own, had brought his one-night affairs to your shared home. The place where you slept in the same bed, fucked on most every surface imaginable had been tarnished with decisions that he’d never be able to undo.

Your gaze hardened. It didn’t matter anymore. With lives that never ended, vampires weren’t known for their monogamy. You were naïve to think that a man like Dazai would give that to you.  

“I mean it, Dazai.” You shoved away the vile memories from the forefront of your mind, wanting them to stay just that – memories. They would not become a repetition of the past. “If you kill him, I’ll burn you to ashes. Then, I’ll step into the flames myself.”

“Ah, but wouldn’t that be such a lovely way to go? Tossed into the flame by the very woman I care for most dearly, reunited only moments later in death.” He seemed too fascinated by the idea, his gaze faraway as if wondering what could possibly push you to that breaking point.

“Hell has a special place for you, Dazai,” you said, disgusted. “Somewhere far, far away from me.”

He laughed darkly. “Oh, how wrong you are. If I am the devil himself, as so many say that I am, then I’ll ensure we spend every moment in the flames together.”

Your lip curled, and you pushed him back in abhorrence, ignoring the tug in your heart that wanted to do everything but. You hated him, you loved him, you never wanted to see him again, you wished he’d stay by your side forever.

Nothing was more dangerous than the allure of fond memories. It seemed even those could lead you to turn a blind eye to the horrors that had been unleashed in the very city you inhabited.

You exhaled. There had to be a line in the sand, a point that you could never pass.

“Please, Dazai. Let me go.” His very presence had already put a kink in your future plans, and if he stayed any longer, you weren’t sure how much damage he’d cause. “Things can never go back to the way they were. I don’t want them to.”

“I don’t either,” he promised, nodding sincerely. “You’ll be rid of me once I make sure that this is what you really want. Who would I be if I watched you lock yourself into a marriage with a man you can never love more than you loved me? To watch you live a life reduced to hiding in the shadows, pretending you were never there at all?”

The arrogant bastard.

“I do love Atsushi more than I ever loved you,” you said with as much conviction as you could muster, your eyes full of flames, unrelenting. That man was waiting for you downstairs, probably worried out of his mind. You refused to play any more games. “Loving you was the biggest mistake I ever made. It was a mistake to let you turn me. I regret all of it.”

Dazai’s lips curled, his gums exposed as he snarled. “Ah, but mistakes are your specialty, aren’t they? You’ve made even more in my absence.”

You said nothing, tired of already falling into the same routine with him. The same old song and dance, taking you back to a time when all you had was him, a time you never wanted to go back to again. The exchange of cruel words was more familiar than your own last name.

“I should be on my way to my room. Sunrise is fast approaching, and I won’t be taking any risks, now that I know what I have to look forward to.” He bowed his head, though you could see his careless smirk, filling you with an irrepressible anger. “I’ll be around.”

With that, you watched him turn and walk out the door, ruining the rest of your evening.

Dazai’s chin was covered in blood, clots drying together around his lips as he pulled away from the lifeless doll between you, the woman that had once been on her way to becoming a well-known actress. Now, she’d be found in a pile of her own blood, the liquid creating a sticky pool beneath her.

It was a sight you’d never tire of; Dazai the very product of his own misdeeds, looking forever the gruesome killer that he made himself out to be. He was most alluring this way, his fangs protruding over his lips, teeth-stained ruby red from the drink of eternal life.

Your adoration for him was most intense in moments like these, when blood became the one thing that bound you together.

“You are beautiful,” he said, shoving aside the corpse, her deadweight toppling onto the floor. “Everyone pales in comparison to you, my darling.” His fingers were soft around your jaw, bringing you closer, reducing the space between his own lips and yours. “I am eternally yours.”

You woke in the bed that you’d chosen to share with another, the one with a squeaky spring, so unlike the coffins you’d previously spent your days in. The room was completely dark, sun-proofed to save you from your fatal weakness. It could have been the middle of the day, and you wouldn’t have known.  

Atsushi was beside you, a flickering candle creating shadows on his features as he read through his reports. It’d become routine for him to be by your side as you slept, now that you didn’t fear the sun slipping through cracks on the boards.

It wasn’t as much time as you would’ve liked together, being on such different schedules, but you made it work as best you could. Atsushi often went into work with puffy eyes from sleepless nights, or you fumbled around the house, bored while the whole city slept.

“Are you alright?” he asked, eyes full of concern. His hand inched across the bed to hold your own. “You haven’t been yourself since yesterday evening.”

You hated that he’d noticed, even though it was his job to do so. It was wrong to keep secrets from the man you loved, even more when you were to be married in just a few months.

Still, you were reluctant to say anything on the matter, certain that you could deal with Dazai on your own. You’d mentioned him to Atsushi only once, and it was through vague details that gave the impression you were in too much pain to talk about it. Like the sweet man he was, Atsushi had accepted it, and he had never once forced the words from your mouth.

You owed him nothing, but it felt wrong to keep your history with Dazai a secret from him. Especially now. Especially when Dazai, who was a loose cannon on his own, had never been very rational when you were around.

“I’m fine.” You sat up in the bed, maneuvering closer to the side where Atsushi was, his legs spread out in front of him. He was wearing casual clothes and seemed scrubbed clean from a bath. It must have been later than you thought. “Just a weird dream is all.”

“I didn’t know vampires had dreams.” Atsushi went back to his reports.

That was because you’d never told him. You rarely had dreams, and when you did, they were more like memories. Or some prophetic, horrible vision that you’d learn to ignore. Nothing pleasant, like when you were human.

“What time is it?”

“About eight. Sun should be down by now, I haven’t checked. I’ve been working—there seems to be an increased amount of crime this week. I don’t know who came into town, but they’ve got an itch for trouble.”

“It’s not a vampire, is it?” you asked, instantly feeling nauseous. Dazai had no qualms about making a spectacle of killing humans. He’d leave a string of bodies like a signature, knowing you’d recognize his mark.

Atsushi snorted. “No, I think I’d see the signs. Just some regular guy.”

You weren’t convinced. Dazai knew how to hide his tracks and make it seem like anything but a vampire, but you convinced yourself to keep quiet. If Atsushi had even a suspicion about Dazai, he’d go after him, and you didn’t want to see what would happen if he did.

For both your sake and Atsushi’s, you hoped that he was right about this.  

“Okay.” You threw the covers off the bed, putting yourself together with the clothes you’d strewn across the room. Atsushi’s eyes remained on the paper, ever the savior of the city he lived in. It was admirable, really, even if his work took some fraction of your time with him away. “I’m going to go out, Atsushi. I’m starving.”

“Want me to come?” he asked, finally looking up, much too eager. He was always so willing to stand by as you clamped your jaws into rodents, feeding off the unwanted pests that lingered the streets.

It was disgusting. You knew that your diet to him, and to all the other humans, was noble. It was repentance for all the horrid sins you’d committed at your lowest point.

To vampires, it meant you were rejecting your nature, trading your gift for a chance to thinly grasp at the cord of humanity you’d never truly held at all. It was abhorrent and shameful.

“No,” you said, certain that if anyone saw you feed on a rat that evening, you wouldn’t be able to recover. How Atsushi could stand to be with you after that display of events was beyond your comprehension. “I need to clear my head.”

“Okay.” Sometimes, you wondered if he’d ever doubted you at all. He was always understanding of each rejection, each carefully chosen word, no matter how harsh they were. “Will you be back quickly?”

“Of course.” With that you smiled, never wanting to waste the precious hours you had with your fiancée before the sun rose. “I love you.”

“I love you too.” Atsushi kissed you before blowing out the candle and laying his head down. “I’m going to take a nap. I’ve been working on this all afternoon.”

“See you later.” You watched as he tucked himself into the bed you’d just left, waving at you lazily from the covers.

You swallowed down the sharp pang in your chest, looking away from him as you left the room, into another that was bathed in moonlight.

Really, you were content with your, but the arrangement between you and Atsushi was growing dismal. While you made it work, you always had, you couldn’t help but feel guilty that you’d never be able to accompany him on daylight ventures, confined to your midnight prison.

You lost your head as you traveled through the dark streets, the city busy with nightlife now that the sun was far beyond the horizon. As usual, there were all kind of people out and about, the rich and poor, the young and old, the good and the bad. And you, the worst of all, the one pretending to fit right in with the rest of them.

After a young couple, not much older than Atsushi, crossed the road, you slunk down into an abandoned alley, bending yourselves into the shadows like the nightly creature you were. You heard the rats scurrying about before you could even spot them, your supernatural hearing so much more attuned to subtle sounds.

With a face, you walked to the hub of rats, your speed much quicker than any of their tiny legs. One particular animal looked back at you, intrigued against its very nature, holding a piece of garbage between its small human-like hands.

You took the rat by the neck, staring into its beady eyes as you plucked it from the ground like a dandelion. The creature looked back at you so helplessly that you almost felt guilty for freeing it from its meaningless existence. Without thinking, you bit into its flesh, draining the rodent dry. The fur was rough against your tongue, disgusting as always as the strands got caught in your teeth.

It wasn’t enough. What little blood you had gained from the animal was never enough to sustain the bloodlust that had increased tenfold since Dazai stepped back into your life.

With a sideways glimpse down the alley, you plucked another rat from the gutter, remembering why you were destroying your own dignity in such a way.

“You’ve made some concerning decisions lately, but this certainly takes the cake.”

With the rat still thrashing around your lips, you glanced up at the man lingering down the alley, his tone cruel and mocking. You continued to suck the last bit of blood from the rodent before tossing the body aside, meeting Dazai’s eyes.

“Why do you care?” you asked, and though you were still starved and lightheaded, you would draw your hunt to a conclusion. You would only embarrass yourself further with Dazai’s keen stare watching your every move.

“I’d wondered why you seemed so weak.” He tossed a disgusted look towards the rats scurrying through the trash, their plump bodies dragging thick tails behind them. “I see, now.”

“Spare me the lecture. I swore I’d never feed from another human, and I’ve never broken my vow.” A rat ran past you, unafraid, even after you’d just killed another member of its clan. The long tail hit your ankle, and you cringed, to Dazai’s satisfaction.

“You’ll get yourself killed. For a vampire of your age, you should be much stronger than this.” He took a step towards you, cornering you in the alley. “Now, you’re a threat to no one.”

“Then, I will die. Something I’m surprised you haven’t done already.”

Dazai was silent, his eyes hard. For all of his promises of the threats that lie out there, you couldn’t spot another but him. There were dangerous vampires in the world, you knew that better than anyone, but he’d always be the one you feared the most.

“Will you continue to torment me for another night?” you sighed wearily, wiping the blood from your chin with a handkerchief. “Your very presence exhausts me.”

Dazai, irritatingly, lit a fire deep in your gut, increasing your hunger to lengths you hadn’t felt in years. You could smell his blood from where you stood, the ambrosia that you’d never tire of. It was a dessert so unlike anything you’d tasted as a human, and you hated that he was tempting you with it now.

Your vision flashed with images of you sinking your fangs into his shoulder, draining him of every last drop as you lost yourself into the man that was Dazai Osamu.

Dazai eyed you carefully, dragging his gaze down to your chest, across your body, back to the blood-stained mouth that remembered too fondly what it was like to taste him. “You still wear the ring I gave you, hovering delicately over your heart.”

You’d forgotten; or you just thought he’d never notice. You’d hidden it under layers of clothing, but still, it had broken free. “A reminder of my past mistakes. It has nothing to do with sentimental value.”

He hummed, considering twirling it around his index finger before he thought better of it. “If that’s the case, why haven’t you turned another companion? Is it not for the hope that we might return to another one day?”

You hadn’t noticed when he’d gotten so close, close enough to touch you. It became hard to focus, even as he kept a respectable distance, letting you retain a semblance of control.

“Atsushi clings to his human life as I did. I will never turn him against his will.” You stood taller, even as you refused to look into his brown irises, to see the mockery that was pushed back at you. “When the moment is right, only then will I do so. That’s something you’d never understand.”

He laughed. “You’ll continue with this narrative, will you?”

You said nothing, staring at the bodies of dead rats that would soon begin to decay. Let him find amusement in the choices you’ve made.

“Sweetheart,” Dazai said, his voice softening with the tone you’d never been able to resist. Your heart twisted, your forehead wrinkling as you kept your eyes firmly on the ground. “Don’t hurt yourself in this way. These vermin will not sustain you.”

“I won’t hunt with you, Dazai. I won’t kill anyone. Don’t try to deceive me into coming back to you.”

“That’s not what I was suggesting.” Before you could discern his actions, Dazai had bit into his wrist, opening a vein as blood poured down his forearm.

You froze.

Fangs had dropped over your bottom lip without a thought, your pupils dilating with the desire of blood. The scent was hard to resist, a sweetness that had been placed on this Earth only for you, handed over from the Devil in an attempt to bring you furthest from God. Though, that might have been all wrong... maybe your god was standing right before you.

Your eyes glued to the fountain of life, and you began to doubt your restraint. It’d been so long.

“Dazai—” you tried to step away, but your feet were cemented, buried under the cobblestones of the dimly lit street. You were a stronger woman than this, and certainly a vampire of your age would not collapse at the sight of blood in the way you were. “Stop it.”

“I’m trying to help you.”

“I don’t want your help. This isn’t what I want at all.”

You finally tore your gaze away, taking a few more steps back into the alley as you regained control of yourself, sick with a yearning for him. Dazai was playing a torturous game, and you refused to be the victim.

The vein closed, and Dazai watched you curiously, but he made no move to reopen the wound. Your irrational thoughts began to calm, and though you could still smell the blood that circled through his body, warm from a recent kill, your resolve was now stronger.

“I can’t stand to see you like this.” His words were hard, disappointed. “I won’t leave until I know you’re safe from harm. Even a mortal could end you with the weakened state you’re in.”

“Safe from harm?” you asked, crossing your arms over your chest protectively. “I’m in no danger here. I’ve been fine without you for fifty years, and I will continue to be fine without you for the rest of eternity.”

His voice deepened, eyes narrowing into a glare as he watched you retreat. “Don’t pretend to be a fool. Your very position with me put you at risk. You betrayed vampires even older than me, and they won’t stop until you’re dead.”

You exhaled, looking up at the stars before dropping your attention back to Dazai. “I don’t think you actually care. You told me that you loved me, and time and time again, you failed me. You left me there, Dazai. I had no choice but to betray them; they were going to kill me.”

“I thought they already had.” He reached out to you, curling his hands around your chin, desperate and wanting and so many things that you had never seen him. “Don’t you understand? I thought you were already dead. I never would have left if I’d known the truth. I’d never think of escaping without you.”

Your breath caught, and while you couldn’t stand to believe him, you felt yourself giving in a little more, succumbing to Dazai each time you crossed his path. Still, you removed his hands from your face, forcing yourself to be a little stronger, to put up those steely walls until he left your life once and for all. “I don’t trust you, Osamu, and you don’t trust anyone but yourself. There’s no reason for us to be speaking at all.”

His jaw tightened, but he let you go, straightening with a frustration he didn’t deserve.

“I’m going home to my fiancée—the man who has never put conditions on his affection. Please, stay as far away from me as you can.”

You shoved past him, shaking with nerves. Though he was stronger, he stumbled back, watching you go with an emotion you couldn’t discern.

PART II

tag list: @cerberels @thateldribitch @hauntedsol @hannzai @cha0thicpisces @kissesmellow21 @sukiischaotic @hinata7346

[moodymisty]

I mean you got anything sweet for Blood Angels...

Though my brain keeps jumping to Flesh Tearers but I feel like that's just me trying to get myself to write for Flesh Tearers (and Lamenters)

(Rambling idea below)

I mean lets be honest Blood Angels are ultimate predators for humans... being so handsome I mean Sanguinius was often called ethereal and other worldly with his beauty. So of course his sons are handsome and all so well bred for the arts... easy to lure in many humans to just listen to their prose or see their paintings.

Just don't show up during your period because suddenly a lot of the poetry is about blood or blood adjacent... they can't seem to find the right red paint... and why do so many of them look at you like they are dying of thirst?

[ 𝕸𝖔𝖔𝖉𝖞𝕸𝖎𝖘𝖙𝖞'𝖘 𝕸𝖆𝖘𝖙𝖊𝖗𝖑𝖎𝖘𝖙 | 𝕬𝖔3 ]

Author’s note: Do I have something for Blood Angels- BOY DO I! Enjoy! I didn't exactly do your idea but I've had this plot in my head for weeks and wanted to use it and you're ask was the only one that let me /sob Not my best work by far, but I hope you enjoy.

Relationships: Unnamed Blood Angel/Fem!Reader

Warnings: NSFW, Oral, Period blood kink/menstrual kink that type of stuff, Is this too weird? maybe I dunno you guys all seem like freaks so hopefully this will go over well? If not I can just return to my dungeon

"Why are we going this way?"

This is a long way around, though some of the Red Tear's maintenance areas. He doesn't answer you however, and with disgruntlement you let the question lie as you return to more civilized parts of the Red Tear.

This whole interaction has been odd, since he had picked you up to escort you back from your duties. Normally he doesn’t act like this; He's stoic and lacks a good bit of emotion yes, but you almost feel as if now he’s taking you to your execution.

"I thought you were missing,"

You had jokingly said, walking closer to him. This planet had been pleasant enough after the Blood Angels brought it under the Imperium, but you're quite eager to return to Terra. Or at least the Red Tear.

He ignored your little comment and stepped closer, but you noticed his face change when he got close enough to touch you. His body became more rigid, and you furrowed your brow as you looked up at him.

"Are you ok?" You say as he clears his throat and nods stiffly. "Yes. We should return to the Red Tear. Our work here is done."

You look up at him again try and get any sort of hint as to how he's feeling, but he only has that same, stiff expression; Though slightly more irritated than usual.

You round yet another corner to see a group of freshly armored Blood Angels leaving one of the armoring rooms. They all perk up at the sight of you, staring at you like something fierce. You get more than a bit uncomfortable under their gaze, until your supposed guardian grabs your arm and swiftly pulls you down the hall past them. He glares at them to keep their distance, and you grab at his gauntlet to try and relieve some of the pressure. You're arm is in pain from how tight he's pulling you along, until you stop in front of a room he opens.

It's not your own, so you presume it's his. He shoves you inside.

"Stay here."

As a diplomat you technically reside outside the command structure of the Blood Angels, but no one in their right mind would disobey an astartes. Especially one that is looking at you with such fire in his eyes. He turns to leave, but your sudden question makes him turn towards you again.

"What is all this? Why are you-" He grabs you tight at the shoulder, and you gasp in pain as the force of it pins you to the wall.

"Why do you smell like blood?"

You pull at his hand and grimace in pain, and at his oddly specific question.

"What? It's just normal, It's that time of the-" He lightly shakes your shoulder and despite speaking relatively quiet, his voice still hits you in the chest with out seething it sounds.

"Every one of my brothers on this ship can smell you. You're lucky I got to you before one of them did."

Even if they did, why does he speak of it like something would happen? Like he avoided it for a reason? He's talking as if you would be in danger if they found you, for something seemingly so simple.

“What would happen if they did?”

You quietly question, watching the expression on his face instantly change. He looks conflicted, like he’s nearly lost in thought. For awhile you think you may not even get an answer from him, until you finally see his lips shift.

“I, assume you’ve heard mutterings of a curse in your time here.”

You have vaguely- even he had cursed it once. At the time you'd assumed it some sort of unfamiliar swear or perhaps just an odd phase adopted by Blood Angels, and so you'd paid it little mind other than the initial confusion. When you hesitantly nod, he continues.

“The curse is real. It has changed our legion. And,” You figure he’s about to speak a secret he shouldn’t to someone like you, so you stay quiet.

“It makes the smell of blood, tempting.” He continues. “It sates a hunger only we Blood Angels possess, and keeps us from going raving mad.”

He quiets, and you feels his gauntlets shift on your shoulders. He changes the subject to something adjacent; You assume he probably feels guilt for confessing a chapter secret to you.

“You’re not hurt?” He says confusedly. You aren’t particularly surprised he knows little about such things, though explaining it to him in this state would take far too long and be far too unfruitful.

“No. I'm fine.” He hums. You think you hear him mumble about hearing such a thing from somewhere, a woman's illness, and the comment would make you laugh if he wasn't looming down on you so intensely.

“Very well.” He shifts his jaw a bit, the scars along it shifting. He seems to have run out of things to say, though it also seems like he can't pull himself away from you. His throat and jaw are tightly wound, like he's holding something back.

“You want some… Don’t you?”

He seems surprised oddly enough; Perhaps by your bluntness and stupidity. Many legions would not take kindly to you assuming things about them, but Blood Angels are remarkably kinder. He is remarkably kinder.

“I," He grimaces. "I would owe you a great deal. Our superiors look at those with the Red Thirst as little more than a danger.”

The Blood Angels have been nothing but kind to you, in their own way. To even just be on the Red Tear is a safety and security you couldn’t repay.

It helps that it's him; You haven't ventured far around the Blood Angels ship alone, and you shamefully feel yourself beginning to get attached. If this curse can be sated by something so seemingly menial to you, then you have no reason to refuse.

“Ok.”

You move to take off your pants hands shaking just barely in nervousness, as he drops to his knee with one heavy thud. The sound startles you, just as your pants fall to the floor.

Once they’re off, and just your underwear remains, you hesitate for a moment. His stare is so intense, and you don't know how to describe it other than hungry. Given what he's told you, it makes perfect sense.

After what feels like and eternity of you being frozen, you finally manage to regain enough control to peel your underwear away. He viscerally reacts to the presumably iron filled scent, and the sight of blood against your now bare skin.

You see the way the knot in his throat bobs just above the black skinsuit beneath his armor.

With a speed that has you almost letting out a scream he grips your hips pulls them forward enough that the angle feels precarious, but he has a solid enough grip that leaves no chance of you falling. He throws your right leg over his shoulder next to open your thighs, your foot pressing against the front of his jetpack.

He hesitates for a moment, and you look away from the sheer intensity of his expression before you feel his hot breath on your skin.

You feel the moment he finally takes a taste and you can barely hold in a whimper, it coming out a tiny squeak as you feel the way his hands shift and tighten against your hips. Any hesitation he had is gone near instantly, as he presses his mouth against your cunt.

His armored hands grip at your hips with a strength that makes you ache and fear bruises, easily keeping your legs spread with minimal effort as his tongue laps at your folds. You can see the blood smear across his face, though he pays no mind. He acts as if this is the first meal he's had in ages, or the last he'll ever have.

But while perhaps your pleasure might not be at the forefront of his mind in his quite literal bloodlust, the way his tongue slips between your folds and teases you still makes shivers go up your spine. Your hands grip his hair and attempt to steady yourself, as his strength pushes you around. It's impossible to stop the way your hips push forward trying to get closer to him, gasping as he briefly brushes around your clit.

Suddenly however he pulls himself away, mouth stained much the same as your cunt and upper thighs are. You can see his eyes are glassy his throat bobs.

"I should stop."

He mumbles something to himself about loosing himself further to the Thirst, as if he's treading a line between sating his hunger or falling victim to it. You, perhaps stupidly, encourage him to do the exact opposite.

"No, no just, just a bit more,"

You breathlessly whisper and attempt to pull him closer. He silently resists for a moment, before the knot in his throat bobs and he returns his mouth to between your legs. You can't stop the loud moan you let out into the barren room, damning the consequences of anyone hearing you.

You're so close to that peak you only need a bit more, and the way his teeth scrape against your skin and nose presses against your clit gets you there. Your hands tighter in his hair and you inhale, trying not to cry out. But even after you start to come down he continues, his mouth overstimulating so many little nerves you feel on the edge of tears. Your face is hot as your fingers grip at his armor, desperately whining for him to simultaneously stop, and never stop.

He pulls away again, and gently emoves your leg from his shoulder to let you stand and wobbly attempt to yourself. Your knees feel weak and so many of your muscles are sore, even though he was exceedingly gentle with you.

Realizing his face is a mess, he uses the fabric of his cape to wipe it; How fortuitous the fabric is red.

"You should still keep clear of my brothers until this, passes. You never know how close one of them is to loosing themselves and hurting you." You'll heed the warning. If they're anything more than what gusto he already displayed, you wouldn't be surprised angels more lost to the thirst would be dangerous to you. He displayed a remarkable degree of restraint, you could tell.

Though, a curious part of your mind wonders what he'd be like if he hadn't.

"Do you at least feel better? I don't know how the Thirst works but," He nods.

"Yes. It is nice to not have my head so clouded. I... Thank you."

You smile, before accidentally letting more words tumble out of your lips that you should've allowed. It seems his presence always seems to makes you accidentally forget how to not act a fool.

"Always happy to help." He takes your phase at face value, though you suppose you wouldn't refuse him if he asked again. It wasn't as if this ended badly for you.

"You are kind, offering yourself to a Blood Angel. Not many would."

Beyond their sophisticated veneer they are still dangerous predators more than capable of killing you with the slightest motion, you understand why any few who learn about their supposed defect would fear them.

Maybe something is clouding your judgement, but you don't fear him; At least not yet.

Adjusting your clothing you watch as he rises to his full height, his cape flowing behind him. You grip your own fingers nervously and look around.

"But, would you mind bringing my back to my own quarters? I'll admit I have no idea where on the ship you brought me, and I'm still a bit woozy." He offers a gentle but stoic smile.

"Of course."