#they need support and i’m willing to give it but they won’t admit it even at cost

[transmechanicus]

Brb crying on this friday night

[ladykailitha]

Sir Steve, Knight Protectorate Part 2

I am absolutely thrilled with how well the first chapter did. Thank you everyone for your support. If you requested to be on the tag list and aren't that means I ran out of room and so so sorry.

You can follow me or the tag #knight protectorate au, as that is the tag I will be using for the series I do with this verse. I hope that helps!

Here we get Steve to the rescue and Eddie instantly heart-eyes. Poor Jeff.

Part 1

~

Steve was getting more push back then he thought he would, but at the same time it was from the people he was expecting.

“Admit it,” Carol said, “you know I’m right. The only reason Tammy is involved in any thing music related is because Mummy Dearest is paying for it all. Her singing is horrible.”

Steve tried to hide his smile, but he really couldn’t.

“See?” she shrieked in glee. “I just don’t know why you won’t let me tell her. Someone needs to before she gets into her head she’s going to be famous or some shit.”

“Because it wouldn’t do anything but make her mad,” he reasoned. “Then she’d tell her mom, and her mom would tell your mom and your mom would ground your ass because they are in the same golfing club or some shit.”

Carol blinked at him for a moment or two and then shrugged. “Yeah, all right. You have a point. But I can still mock her behind her back, right?”

Steve threw back his head and laughed.

“Just keep it between us, yeah?”

She tilted her head to the side and then shrugged. “I guess I could do that.”

He heaved a sigh of relief and was just grateful for the smallest concession she was willing to make.

Everyone knew Carol was still saying shit, but at least she was only saying it to Steve.

“God, Abby,” Nicole whined, “where did you get that dress the trash bin behind Melvand’s?” She laughed as Abby tugged on her the hem of her denim dress. It was wrinkled in that way denim will some times get when it’s put into shapes it wasn’t meant for.

“Fuck off, Nicole,” Steve barked. “You have a dress just like it, it’s just Levi instead of some off brand.”

Nicole’s jaw dropped and whirled on Steve. “Is this the thanks I get for finding that little creep for you?”

Steve raised his eyebrow in disdain. “Helping a guy out doesn’t mean you get to shit on everyone else. She isn’t hurting you. She’s just walking in the hall. And for fuck’s sake, she’s a freshman. We’re all gross at that age. Give it up.”

Nicole’s jaw clicked shut and she turned on her heel, running away. The gathered crowd laughed at her retreating form.

“It’s not funny, assholes,” he huffed. “Laughing at Abby being bullied is the same as laughing at Nicole getting told off for it. It’s still rude.”

The hall went deathly quiet.

Tommy came bounding up to Steve and Carol. “Larry Wiggins just got laid out by Munson trying to hassle him out of some dope.”

Steve grimaced. “Everyone knows that Munson doesn’t sell anything hard on school property. He likes avoiding felony charges.”

Tommy grinned, bouncing on the pads of his toes. “That’s what makes it so hilarious. Munson doesn’t even deal on Tuesdays so he didn’t even have weed to offer him to back off.”

“So Larry takes a swing at Munson and gets flattened for it?” Steve guessed with a heavy sigh.

“Yup!”

Carol giggled as Steve sighed again.

“One of these days a football player is going to knock that guy’s pearly whites out,” he said, shaking his head.

“Oohhh...” Tommy said wincing, pulling his arms up to his chest. “That would be ug-lee!”

Steve hummed his agreement.

~

Look, despite what Eddie’s teachers thought, he wasn’t stupid. After the incident with Wiggins on the basketball team, he had refused to do deals alone.

But then meathead jocks barely used their brains to drool, like alone think.

Eddie was on his way to his picnic table where Doug had been waiting for him when this football player came out of literal nowhere to slam him against a tree.

Eddie’s head swam as he tried to squeeze away his sudden double vision. “What the fuck, man?”

When he could see the captain of the football team, Bobby Vincent, was grabbing him by the collar and shoving him up against the tree.

Bobby pulled out a nearly empty baggie of weed. “You shorted me, asshole. You call this a gram?”

“It was when I sold it to you,” Eddie insisted, hands coming up to grab Bobby’s hand at his throat. “I don’t short. It’s bad for business.” He certainly didn’t short people who throw him around like a rag doll for crying out loud. He didn’t have a death wish.

“You’re going to give me a replacement for free,” Bobby sneered, “aren’t you, pretty boy?”

Eddie tried to yank on the football player’s hand to get him to release him, but the white knuckle grip refused to budge. “I can’t give you shit, man. My supplier would kill me. I’ve got more to think about then just one customer.”

He could see the punch coming and knew there was nothing he could do to stop it. He closed his eyes against the pain he knew was coming.

But the pain never came. He peeked out of one eye and was shocked to see Steve Harrington holding meathead’s wrist. They were both stock still. Which Eddie couldn’t figure it out, he had to open his other eye to see the full tableau in front of him.

Steve had a grip on Bobby’s wrist, that was certainly true, but that wasn’t what had the football player by the short and curlies. Oh no. In Steve’s other hand was a small but very deadly pocket knife. A knife that was current pressed to the ribs on the side of the raised arm. Suddenly Eddie was feeling weak in the knees for a very different reason.

“Hey, Bobby,” Steve said cheerfully, “you weren’t going to hit someone because you’re too shit poor to buy your own weed, were you?”

Bobby looked down at the knife in Steve’s hands and then back up at his face. Bobby snarled and moved to wrench his hand out of Steve’s grasp, but the blade dug deeper. He stopped again and looked over at Eddie who was just as shocked he was at the whole thing.

Like where the fuck did Steve get that knife and why was he carrying it in the first place?

“You going to stick up for this trash, Harrington?” Bobby hissed. “Wheeler made you soft.”

Eddie and Steve both look down at the knife in Steve’s hand and then back up at the football player.

“Just because I’ve been putting my foot down more on the bullying lately,” Steve said, pressing the knife a little further causing Bobby to wince, “doesn’t mean that this is new. I’ve always called you assholes out on it, but now I’m doing something about it. So why don’t you run along and tell all your friends that the king has returned.”

Bobby’s eyes went wide and he nodded. Steve released the wrist first and then stepped back. He waved the knife, indicating Bobby should get a move on and he did. He ran like hell.

“Marry me!” Eddie squeaked as his knees buckled in relief.

Steve dropped the knife and surged forward to catch him before he hit the ground. Just then Jeff showed up and stared at them for a moment.

“Uhh...” he muttered. “Did I miss something?” His tongue worried one of the brackets on his braces as both Eddie and Steve turned to him.

Steve turned a bright shade of red when he realized how this might look to someone else. He helped Eddie get his feet under him and then took a step back. He ran his fingers through his hair and side-eyed Eddie.

“Maybe ask a guy on a date first, yeah?” he murmured before taking off, scooping up the knife up on his way out. Leaving behind two very confused metalheads in his wake.

Well, one confused metalhead and one confused and horny metalhead.

Jeff turned to Eddie. “You want to tell me what the fuck that was about?” He jutted his thumb at the space in the trees that Steve had vanished into.

So Eddie told him.

“And um... I didn’t get my ass beat so...our King is some flavor of queer?” He meant that as a statement, but it came out as more of a question, because holy fuck that was crazy to think about.

Jeff looked at him for a long moment. “I understand you are currently having a gay panic right now, but um...shouldn’t you be more concerned with the fact that he had that knife on him in the first place? Because seriously, does Steve Harrington seem the type to be carrying around any kind of weapon?”

Eddie blinked a couple of times before he turned to look down the path both jocks had taken with a tinge more fear then he had before.

“That is a fair question, Sir Jeffrey,” he agreed. “But as it has saved this lowly jester’s ass, let’s give our king a pass, shall we?”

Jeff licked his lips slowly and then nodded. Because whatever happened to Steve that frightened him enough to start carrying a knife to school with him, he would much rather not know.

~

News spread fast. Steve Harrington was not to be trifled with and if you were caught bullying, he would make it his problem.

The faculty noticed, because how could they not. When someone makes it their one man mission to make the school safe for everyone, it wasn’t hard to see the changes wrought.

Only soon it wasn’t just Steve. The group that had included Nicole, Tina, Carol, and Tommy H. who were once the worst of the worst would patrol the halls between classes.

Eddie and his band of Freaks and Nerds were more than a little shocked when they were included in the protection. Because let’s face it, even other marginalized groups tended to push him and his friends around.

Well they tried. A couple of well aimed punches and threats of not selling to them or their friends usually got them to back off. But this was real protection, not just a cat puffing up his fur to look bigger and meaner than he was.

Hawkins High had an honest to Satan knight protectorate. Fuck.

Eddie thought those were only existed in fantasy novels and D&D campaigns. And if there was a gang of knights errant in Eddie’s next campaign with the names, Thom, Stephan, Nicolette, Caroline, and Christina, that was between him and the members of the Hellfire Club and no one else.

He thought he was going to catch shit for that from his friends, but apparently Sir Steve had won over their hearts as well.

However it was only a matter of time before the bullies got creative. Because some people just like to torture they find inferior.

They would hip check their targets into the lockers, always with a “Whoops!” and a sneer. They would knock their shoulders into them with a “Watch it!” and a smirk. They would whack books and lunch trays out their hands with a “Sorry...” and a grin.

Steve’s merry band would always check on the victim, but they really couldn’t say shit, because it could have been an accident. Though really, they weren’t fooling anyone but the teachers.

Eddie could see it coming to a head sooner rather than later and god, he hoped he got to witness it first hand.

~

Part 3

Tag List: CLOSED

1-@mira-jadeamethyst @rozzieroos @itsall-taken @redfreckledwolf @zerokrox-blog

2- @gregre369 ​@a-little-unsteddie @chaosgremlinmunson @messrs-weasley @cryptid-system

3- @maya-custodios-dionach @goodolefashionedloverboi @val-from-lawrence @carlyv @wonderland-girl143-blog

4- @justforthedead89 @irregular-child @bookbinderbitch @bookworm0690 @forgottenkanji

5- @anne-bennett-cosplayer @yikes-a-bee @awkwardgravity1 @littlewildflowerkitten @genderless-spoon

6- @dragonmama76 @ellietheasexylibrarian @thedragonsaunt @useless-nb-bisexual @disrespectedgoatman

7- @counting-dollars-counting-stars @tinyplanet95 @ravenfrog @swimmingbirdrunningrock @lingeringmirth

8- @gutterflower77 @a-lovely-craziness @just-a-tiny-void @w1ll0wtr33 @beelze-the-bubkiss

9- @gringa-rae-jepsen @bluelightsinthevoid @mamafaithful @allmyworldsendwithtears @xxbottlecapx

10- @sadisticaltarts @yeahhhh-suga @ohimamarigold @imamixofeverthing @samsoble

[pjoxreader]

could i get jason, percy, and leo looking after an overly affectionate drunk reader (fem pls)

Drunk Reader (Fem)

Jason Grace

-The second he realizes you’re a bit too drunk he decides it’s time to go home. You were clinging to his neck making Jason hold your waist to ensure you wouldn’t fall.

-”But Jason I don’t want to go yetttt.” you complain to him slurring your words. Jason huffs a little fondly at that as he sweeps you off your feet carrying you bridal style. 

-”Not even if we binge your favorite show and I cook you some breakfast?” he suggests. That was all the convincing you needed as you grumbled something into his chest, pressing yourself as close to him as you could get.

-Jason gives a goodbye to the rest of the group as he gets you home, carrying you the entire way. When you get home he works on making breakfast, but he has to work around having you right in front of him, since you could still be close and cuddle up with him.

-Even with that challenge he manages to get breakfast done, thanks to some cooking classes from Leo of course. You had been really thankful for that because Jason’s cooking was awful before…

-He gets you over to the sofa getting on your favorite show, while making sure you get plenty of water and eat a hearty breakfast of eggs, bacon, and plenty of toast to help with your eventual hangover.

Percy Jackson

-Everyone knew that you were clingy while drunk, it worked out sense Percy was just as clingy if not more. He’ll cling to you like a koala bear while the two of you take turns telling each other how much you love each other.

-The two of you were just having the time of your life dancing to Poker Face, which made you nearly cry laugh since Percy had told you about the whole Lotus Casino incident. 

-You had plenty to drink and we’re busy drunkenly arguing over who loved the other more. “I love you to… To the bottom of the ocean!~” you huff unhappily at that crossing your arms as you were competitive. “Well… I love you to the moon and back!” That went on longer than you’re willing to admit.

-You both enjoy the night until the end of the night partying, drinking and eating plenty of food. You have to use each other for support and thankfully have Grover drive you both home. Though it was a bit of a struggle to get you away from Percy long enough to get you buckled up.

-When you get home you both crash into bed, knowing well that you were going to suffer a horrible hangover the next day. Which you did.

-Thankfully Percy was nice enough to make you pancakes in the morning. You were too hung over to care that they were radioactive blue.

Leo Valdez

-Ever had someone explain to you how a mechanical dragon works in less than an hour? Well you sure had now. Leo would go on longgg rants about things he was working on and different things that annoy him during his project.

-Not that you mind you were just contently snuggled up into his arm, enjoying your buzz as you listen to Leo rant. You decide you want to cuddle more and shift into his lap to cuddle up into his chest. 

-He nearly catches you on fire but he quickly pats himself out, putting his arm on the top of the chair. “you uh, come here often?” he says, trying to play it off. You can’t help but laugh at that as you snuggle into his chest.

-He smiles lovingly and softly as he wraps his arms around you “I’m so lucky…” he mumbles as he presses a kiss to your head. “So damn lucky… Promise you won’t leave…” his voice was soft as if this was a secret between the two of you.

-”I promise…” you muttered softly as you were starting to nod off into the warmth of Leo’s arms. And just like that you were out like a light. It didn’t take long before Leo fell asleep soundly too, holding you close as if you’d leave him in his sleep.

-The other seven had to work on carrying you both out, since you both were out cold no matter how hard they tried to wake you up.

~Masterlist & Rules~

Like my writing? Please consider sending me a Ko-fi! ☕

[moonstruckme]

hello! I hope you are well and Christmas is treating you nicely so far! I was wondering if I could potentially request something based around reader not knowing how to swim with perhaps poly!marauders or any other character of your liking? Obviously do not feel any inclination to do so if this is unappealing! thank you!

Thanks sweetheart, hope the holiday season is treating you nicely as well!

cw: reader has a mild fear of water/drowning

Steve Harrington x fem!reader ♡ 1.1k words

Steve’s hands rove your calves, cajoling. “C’mon, you know I won’t let anything happen to you.” 

“I don’t understand why you care so much.” 

“And I don’t understand why you would wear a swimsuit,” he laughs, “if you’re not going to swim.”

You look down at the smallest bikini you own, then raise a brow at him. “Well, it wasn’t for me.”

Steve’s grin turns smug but he doesn’t let up, wrapping his fingers around your ankle and giving a little tug. Not enough to drag you into the pool by a long shot, but enough that you brace your hands on the wet concrete by your butt. 

You give him a warning look. “Steve, quit.” 

He does, going back to soothing his palms up and down your calves. You’ve got your feet in the water, and that’s as far as you’re willing to go. You can watch Steve swim from right here.

“Look, I’m not saying you don’t look great up there. I mean, you do, you really—” he gives you a meaningful look that makes your already sun-warmed skin heat a touch further, seemingly mindless of the swarms of people around you “—really do, but I’m just thinking you’d look even better if you were in here with me, you know?” 

You tap your fingers on the edge of the pool, casting a look towards the shallow end. It’s chock-full of screaming kids and toddlers bobbing around with arm floaties, but it looks infinitely more inviting than where Steve is in front of you, barely touching the ground. 

“Can we go over there?” you ask, jutting your chin in that direction.

He turns to look at that side of the pool reproachfully. “Babe, the shallow end is like two-thirds piss. Just hop in right here. I won’t let you drown, okay?” 

You chew your lip. “That’s a low bar.” 

Steve grins, sensing victory. “I will make sure you flourish, honey, alright? Just trust me.” 

You take in a breath and hold it, nodding hesitantly. “Okay,” you say. 

Steve’s smile widens. His wet hands slide up your legs and grip you under your thighs. You think he’s going to support you as you ease in, but in the next second he’s lifted you off the concrete, spilling you into the water with him. 

You gasp in surprise at the action and the cold and skitter up him, wrapping your legs around his torso and clutching at his shoulders. 

“Steve!” you squeak, heart in your throat. The absence of any surface beneath your feet, the sheer jeopardy of it, makes your blood icy with terror. 

“You’re okay, you’re—jeez, you really are freaked, huh? Think you could retract your claws?” Steve keeps one hand on your back while the other pries at your fingers on his shoulders. After a second, you loosen your grip slightly. Just slightly. “Thanks, babe. No need to cut into me, I wasn’t going to drop you.” 

“I wasn’t expecting it!” you say, voice still pitched high. “You scared me.” 

Steve softens. His hand splays out on your back, keeping you more securely in place. “Sorry. I’m sorry, I just thought it’d be better to get it over with. But you’re okay, see? It’s all good.” 

You shiver a bit from the cold, hugging him tighter. Your boyfriend’s skin is warm despite the frigid water, his shoulders under your hands dry and freckling from the sun. And you can admit, it’s not the hugest downer in the world to be pressed so close to his shirtless abdomen. 

He senses your train of thought, that smarmy grin spreading across his face again. “Glad you could join me in here, honey.” He slides a hand up to your jaw, angling your face for a kiss. You feel a bit better.

“I don’t know what’s so great about in here,” you say. “We could’ve done this just as easily on solid ground.” 

“Mmm, but it’s so much cooler in here. Anyway, we’re teaching you to swim.” 

You raise your eyebrows, a spidery dread starting up in your gut. “We are?” 

“We are,” he confirms happily, palm moving up your spine and back down again once. “It’s an essential life skill, babe. But don’t worry, you’ve got the best teacher on this side of the Mississippi.” 

“Ah, well.” You roll your eyes. “So long as I have him.” 

“Yeah, you’re lucky,” Steve ignores your sarcasm completely, adjusting his grip so he’s got a hand on either side of your waist and holding you out slightly in front of him. Your eyes go wide, and you start to dig your nails into his shoulders again, but he goes on casually, “Okay, just kick your feet.” 

You do, tentatively, feeling silly. Your legs feel awkward underneath you, disorganized and somewhat frantic compared to the other swimmers around you with their placid movements. But Steve smiles at you, proud, and you keep going. 

“Good, not bad, babe. Just keep doing that. Feel how I’m not having to hold you up as much anymore?” 

 “Mhm.” You give him a wary look. “You still can’t let go, though.” 

“I won’t,” he promises easily. “Okay, now try to move your arms around a little.”

“How?” 

“Like, uh…” Steve looks around, nodding to a girl treading water a few feet from you. “Like her.” 

You try, moving your arms from side to side with your palms facing down. 

Steve’s smile widens. It’s contagious, and you grin too, feeling like an idiot. “There you go, you’ve got it! The whole point is to just keep pushing the water down, you know?”

“Yeah.” You’re a bit mystified, struck by the odd feeling of the water moving around you. How surprisingly easy it is to control. You look down at your legs, kicking in weighty nothingness. “I think I get what you mean.” 

“Good, good. Okay, I’m gonna let you do it by yourself for a second.” 

“What?” Your head snaps up. “Steve, please.” 

“You’ve got it,” he reassures you, and slips his hands from around your waist. 

You start kicking double-time. Your hands move faster until they’re just splashing, useless. Suddenly, you can’t remember the motions they’re supposed to be making at all. Your chin touches the water, and you lunge for Steve, wrapping your arms around his neck. 

“That wasn’t bad,” he says, sounding far cheerier than you feel. Your heart pitters against your rib cage. “You did good, honey. You’re learning quick.”

“Can we take a break?” you ask, tightening your grip on him. “I think I like it here better.” 

Steve’s arm bands securely around your back and he presses his lips firmly to your forehead. “Sure,” he promises. His voice is heavy with a quiet contentedness. “Yeah, we can stay here for a while.”

[rafedaddy01]

Warnings: not really any, maybe some angst? Rafe admits feelings for reader in the end but he’s kinda an asshole in the beginning..

A/n: hey lovely’s 🥰 I just wanted to say thank you for all the support. It’s been a journey and I’m so happy to be able to be back and writing, I know you guys have some ideas so I’m asking if anyone is willing to share to help me get out of my writing rut. (Comments, reblogs, likes are appreciated but not mandated.) Thank you!!

-

The music blared as the flashing lights blinded you, but you were too caught up in the moment. Drunk off a couple drinks and shots you downed with your friends, your hips swaying to the beat of the loud music. “Look whose here!” Your friend shouted over the music and nodded her head in the direction of the boys that just walked in.

“Shit” you groaned as you felt your high slip at merely the sight of him. Rafe Cameron. Kook King. Fuck boy of the island, you name it, that’s him. Overall he was a royal douchebag and also happened to be your ex boyfriend who lived to torment you. “Funny seeing you here” Rafes eyes lingered on your body a beat too long as a small smirk rose his lips.

“Fuck off rafe” you snapped at him as you pushed past his boy toys, topper and kelce, and made your way to the drinks table. “Rawr, baby’s got claws” he teased back and you heard the boys snicker at Rafes childish remark. As you pour yourself another drink that familiar smell of sandalwood invaded your nostrils, a smell you used to adore and now only fills your insides with disgust. His hands come on either sides of the table, caging your body against his. He leans down to whisper in your ear, “wanna dance baby?” You turn your body around and nudge at his shoulder to get him to move but he doesn’t budge. “Come on, y/n, once dance? For old times sake?” You know Rafe well enough to know he won’t take no for an answer and you know him well to know this is all part of his game. It’s a power move he likes to play, reminding you that you’ll never get rid of him, even if you’re not in a relationship anymore.

“Fine. I guess one dance with the devil won’t hurt” you take a chug of your drink as Rafes smile grows wider, his hand outstretched for yours. He leads the two of you onto the dance floor, turning you around and placing his hands on your hips as you start grinding onto him, feeling his erection start slowly rising. He leans his lips down to your ear, his hot breath fanning your neck and making you hotter than you already are. “Let me have you tonight, y/n” he whispers softly in your ear and your head lols to the side as you give into the moment.

Rafe abruptly takes you hand and pulls you off the dance floor and up the stairs, you follow him like a lost puppy, wagging your tail and waiting to be rewarded for being good. You know in the back of your mind you shouldn’t do this. Rekindling your past with Rafe would be a mistake, once you fall into this trap you won’t be getting out again. But your so horny and your so wet already, truthfully you were wet from the moment he walked through the door with his mischievous grin and rings decorating his fingers, but still, you knew you shouldn’t do this yet you wanted to so bad.

To be fair you were also a few drinks and shots in and your mind was a little hazy. Rafe opened the door to a spare bedroom and tossed you onto the bed after shutting the door and locking it. “Are you sure-“ he started to ask only to be interrupted by you “shut up, rafe” you knew that if he spoke you’d change your mind. “Y/n, I need you to know something before we do this” he made his way over to you and took a seat on the bed, cupping your face, he kissed you. A deep, soft, gentle, tender kiss that was unlike anything Rafe ever gave you. “I need you to know that I miss you. You were my everything, the love of my life and I was stupid for letting you go. I was an asshole and I can admit that now. Y/n y/l/n, I love you.

Your in utter shock. Not knowing what to do or say. Rafe has never been this vulnerable with you. Usually he would deflect his feelings with anger, but this, this was something new. Something you’ve always wanted Rafe to be and you weren’t sure if it was all an act.

The music blaring from the party downstairs flooded the awkward silence as you and Rafe stared at each other. He awaited an answer from you but truthfully you didn’t know what to say. “Y/n” Rafe softly spoke. “Say something..” he pleaded as he searched your eyes for any sign of forgiveness or understanding.

“D-did you hear me?” Rafe cleared his throat as he suddenly got self-conscious. Being vulnerable wasnt his thing but yet when it comes to you he finds himself doing a lot of shit he wouldn’t normally do. “Rafe. I-I don’t know what to say. I mean, what do you expect me to say” you scoffed a laugh as you tucked your hair behind your ears, scooting a bit back from rafe and you saw his face drop in hurt. “I-I don’t know what I expect. But I wanted- I needed you to know” Rafe ran a nervous hand through his hair, his eyes now avoiding yours from embarrassment. “I’m not saying no, rafe. I just- you can’t expect me to forgive all the things you did to me because you finally discovered what you wanted. I need time to heal and recover from my trauma before I can give you an answer, I need time” you placed a hand over his on the bed for reassurance. His eyes shot up to meet yours and you noticed the small tears gathering at his waterline. It broke your heart, you wanted to give him the answer he was expecting but you just couldn’t, not yet at least.

Taglist

@f4ll-for-you @v21sstuff @rafeysworldim19 @baby19sthings @sevenwivesofrafecameron @rxfecameronsslut @findapenny @r1vrsefx @spencerreidsrealgf @rafescokenostril @thievin-stealing @hoesindifferentshows @rafemotherfuckingcameron @dilvcv

[carmen-is-away]

angsty elliott headcanons.

content warnings: self harm, toxic relationships, mental illness, violence?, mentions of abuse

He gets attached very quickly to people he’s interested in romantically and will ignore red flags and/or try extremely hard to make them fit them into the idealized narrative he’s created of them in his head

He tends to isolate himself from others once he’s in a romantic relationship and hardly ever spends time with people besides his partner

He worships his partner, I’m talking devoting his whole life to making them happy and ignoring his own wants most times

Loves his partner wholeheartedly and is willing to do almost anything for them, even if they’re not always the best to him

He very desperately wants to be loved

He begrudgingly disowned his parents, they were terrible towards him and never supported him along with being horribly neglectful and abusive albeit having more than enough time and money to do so

He gets violently angry and destructive when his writer’s block is at its peak.

I’m talking throwing his journal across the room and shoving everything off of his desk. He’s pulling his hair and yelling and destroying his surroundings and probably hurting himself

He makes sure to not let his partner or anyone see this though. He hates when people worry about him.

It’s usually followed up by a long and sob and horrible depression episode that lasts somewhere from a few weeks to months.

What can I say? He feels his work very strongly

That also goes for the opposite

He’s running to read you his latest poem because he’s fallen in love with it and he expects you to as well

He may have even brought himself to tears

He will be all over you and ready to jump over the moon if you love it as much as he does

If you aren’t as tender as enthused as he hopes you’ll be or you judge his work harshly with less than constructive criticism, it will be a large blow to his ego and it will break his heart a little

He will understand if you’re busy or tired or not able to put your full focus on it, but if you can and you aren’t, or you're being an asshole, he’s super hurt and he may not always admit or display that in front of you

He craves validation, please give it to him, he might actually go insane without it

He also needs affection. He’s very insecure and will begin to wonder if you’re not attracted to him if you haven’t been affectionate with him in a while. He’s been quite touch starved for a long time

Elliott’s a very broken man and he requires a lot of patience and attention

He needs security and stability and someone who won’t take advantage of him

Please give him the space to make decisions and be accepting of him and give him your attention

Despite his terrible mental health, he’s a wonderful partner and father. Even when he’s doing terribly, he’s all ears and open arms for his family

[maveras-posts]

Being Arts ✨Significant Other✨

The Poll showed an overwhelming support for Art Headcanons so come get your juice ya simps. I never see much on our boi so…LETS CHANGE THAT—

The lovely Tags: @michaelmyers-isdaddy @slasherholic @slasherfxcker @arttheclown-coveredinblood @slasherhaven @strange-and-unappealing @uhh-hi03 @kber2424 @local-caffeine @dem0nic-symph0ny-19 @midnightwritersblock

🤡Art the Clown Relationship Headcanons🖤:

FIRST— ATTITUDE 🙄🤌

Art is Pan and honestly could give two F’s about how you look

You intrigued him in some way

Most likely loved his act or giggled at him…

He is a slut for a strong willed person

At the end of the day he gets his way but breaking down a hard headed person gets him ✨OFF✨ (He is not afraid of the Goth Baddies)

Very protective and possessive (Smothering energy)

Won’t admit it but he needs reassurance you love him and won’t leave him

I mean if you tired he would mostly have you and anyone he blames ✨ReMovEd✨

Art mostly loves to make you laugh, even without speaking🤡

This man is mostly, if not ALWAYS in your personal space

What’s yours is ✨MINES✨

Touch is his major love language

Art is also one to pick someone smaller than him (Lil shit loves it because it makes him “useful”)

For the love of all HUMANITY—WATCH.HIM.AROUND.ANYTHING FLAMMABLE. Trust me…

Also don’t let him around duct tape he makes really cool stuff don’t get me wrong but he abuses the power of the tape😭

He shares all of his trash bag candy with you (YOU GOTTA BE VERY SPECIAL)

You will also be put before him or anyone else

GIFTS are also a must, cheap or expensive he’ll get it for you ✨BorrOWED✨ if ykyk

When he misses you sometimes he honks his horn😭

He’s gonna hurt or k!ll ANYONE who even inconveniences you, he is like oh so they cut you off let me cut them off (ART MY GOD NO—)

Contrary to belief he is actually very gentle with you, you’re like glass to him (He’s not this way with anything or anyone)

In the rankings he is definitely one of the top slashers to be s/o YES he can be toxic but once he loves you (in a sick way) he is not gonna leave your side and will try to make you happy😭✋

Hey Yall I hope you’re all well! I have begun my headcanons for our clown of the hour ART. As always suggestions and requests are open! I’m thinking of getting more into the smutty and NSFW Headcanons for the slashers, input would be most appreciated for this as always thanks for reading and I’ll spook ya later!

-Mavera

[atinylittlepain]

June - Part One

joel miller x f!OC

series masterlist

warnings | 18+ dark themes surrounding suicidal ideation and attempt, eventual smut, angst

a/n | well, I'm a bit nervous to share this one. as I mentioned before, this is going to be quite different than anything I have put out before. Each part is going to be much shorter than my usual fare - anywhere from 2K to 2.5K. Again, please take care reading this, I am touching on very tender topics. I also need to thank @wannab-urs and @jksprincess10 and @beskarandblasters for supporting me through writing this, so much gratitude for you both.

....................................

Cheer up, honey, I hope you can

There is something wrong with me

My mind is filled with silvery stars

Honey, kisses, clouds of fog

"Radio Cure" by Wilco

....................................

She’s a difficult woman. When she wants to be. And he supposes she does. He supposes she’s angry at him. She had made that clear enough. He had taken something from her, a choice, an escape, a way out. But she had taken it from him too. They hold each other’s lives between their teeth, waiting for the other to bite down, to show mercy, to bleed out.

They won’t let her go outside the gates anymore, no patrol shifts. And they have her staying with one of the doctors in town, a watchful eye. From what he’s heard, it isn’t going well. From what he sees, it isn’t going well. Joel isn’t sleeping these days because she isn’t either. He follows her, a shadow, not daring to get too close lest she decides to snap at his presence. 

Most nights, she circles her cage like a despondent animal, fingertips running along the wall that keeps her from doing it again. And he follows after her, willing her to turn over her shoulder, to look at him, to offer him anything. He would take anything she’s willing to give. 

And then he does something to upset her even more. It comes up between him and his brother on patrol. The doctor she’s staying with is at her wit’s end with her. Coming and going at strange hours, silent and snarling. So he offers up the spare room in his house and suddenly she’s stomping up his porch with a backpack and a scowl.

“What exactly are you trying to do?” He has to admit, it’s a good question. One he’s not sure of the answer to.

“You need somewhere to stay, and I have the space.”

“Because your kid doesn’t want to live here anymore?” 

“She ain’t my kid.” 

“Yeah right.”  He’s just content to have her looking at him again, even if she is trying to dig her claws in. But her eyes flicker away fast.

“It’s only for a month. Then they’re gonna let me have my apartment back.” “Whatever you say, June. Your room is upstairs, second door on the–” 

“It’s not fair, you know.” “What’s that?”

“The only difference between you and I is that I got caught. And now I’m stuck in a fucking cage. You may have played hero, but I know why you were out there.” She doesn’t give him a chance to respond, shouldering past him into the house and trudging upstairs. 

For the first time since Ellie left, he starts cooking. Mostly because she’s not eating. Or at least he never sees her eating, no trips to the dining hall, and she only passes through the kitchen to get upstairs. So he starts cooking, albeit simply, leaving plates outside her closed door, happy to see them cleared in the morning. His pants start fitting better again, belt not done on the tightest notch anymore. And he’d like to think she starts looking different too, a little brighter after a few weeks of square meals. 

She doesn’t wander at night anymore. He’s always waiting on the porch to see her come home. She’s even started to mutter a low goodnight when she passes him to go inside, something beating and flickering inside his ribs when she does. 

He knows from Maria that she’s started working at the garden, and one night she comes home with a basket, a few ears of corn, pale and silky in their husks, and strawberries bright enough to make his mouth water. She sets the basket down at his feet, her eyes not meeting his, though she gives him a curt nod before going inside, the light click of the screen door shaking him out of his stupor. 

Sliced into bleeding slivers, how Sarah liked them, with a drizzle of honey where he would have sprinkled sugar, how Sarah liked them. But instead of setting the bowl down outside her door, he decides to knock, and she decides to let him in. 

They sit on the edge of the bed, close enough to hold the bowl between them, their fingers staining sticky from the sweet syrup of the treat, saccharine singing down their throats. And when all the berries are gone, they pass the bowl back and forth, lapping up any remaining sweetness, mouths smacking with want. Her lips are red, swollen from the way she licks at them to chase up what’s left of the taste, and his eyes dart from them to her temple, a much darker red, still healing, still raised and scabbed. 

“Stop looking at it.” 

“I’m not.” “Yes, you are. Everyone does.”

“You wanna look at mine?” Her eyes widen, and he’s already turning his head, running a finger along the sliver on his temple.

“You–”

“I missed, just like you.”

“But you weren’t gonna miss this time, were you?” 

“No, I wasn’t. I’m glad you did though.” It’s the exact wrong thing to say, and he can see the way she shuts down, furling back in on herself, turning away from him, covering the side of her face with her palm.

“Goodnight, Joel.” A long sigh, slipping through his fingers.

“Goodnight, June.” 

…

At the end of the month, she doesn’t leave. There is no conversation about it. She simply doesn’t leave. And Joel has to swallow down his elation at that. 

Soon, her baskets laid at his feet turn into her helping him in the kitchen. They settle into silent rhythms, hips bumping as fat sizzles in the pan, the dull chop of vegetables and the savory sear of meat cooking. They eat together on the back porch, sitting side by side, taking in the lingering light of summer as they fill their bellies. An act that promises permanence. Her scar is quickening, new skin, new, new, new. And when he reaches out for her, his fingers skating over that arced line, she lets him. 

“Can I see yours again?” A nod, a tilt of his head, and a shiver when her fingers press over his scar. 

“I’m glad you missed, Joel.” She kisses angry, her fingers curling in his hair, swallowing up his groan when she tugs too hard. All teeth, nipping, clicking against his, and he wants more, more, more. He goes greedy with it, hands pulling at clothes, pressing her closer, as close as he can, pulling her into his lap and she’s warm, sharp, softening her snarl only slightly when he licks into her mouth. But she’s gone in a flash, pulling away with a gasp, stumbling down the porch steps, all but falling onto her ass as she wipes at her mouth with the back of her hand, eyes wild and wide. And Joel aches because he had her, he had her, and it felt so good and she’s already snapping back and away. 

“I– I’m sorry, June.” She doesn’t offer him anything else, darting past him and back inside. He sits there, slack, long after the sun dips down below the mountains, a shiver setting on him in the chill of the night. 

But she stays. She gets quiet again, cagey, no longer eating with him, only clipped greetings when they pass each other. But she stays. 

He’d like to say something, anything, but in the fleeting moments he sees her, he finds himself choking on words, his throat constricting and she’s already gone. So it’s a surprise when one day, she comes home and wordlessly sits down next to him on the porch. He doesn’t move, barely even breathes, a hummingbird beat away from her disappearing.

“Why doesn’t your kid live with you anymore?” 

“She ain’t my–”

“Fine, why doesn’t not your kid live with you anymore?” An inhale and an exhale, he has to clear his throat before he answers.

“I lied to her. And did a lot of things she didn’t agree with.”

“Why’d you do that?”

“I was trying to protect her.” 

“Did you?”

“Did I what?” “Protect her?” 

“I suppose I did. Reckon if this is the price I have to pay– for her to be safe– I’m fine with that.”

“Is that why you were out there that night?” 

“Yes.” She hums at that, the both of them still looking straight ahead. He can feel the warmth of her from where her thigh rests so close to his.

“Why haven’t you tried again?” He finally breaks, turning his head to squint at her, her eyes finding his.

“What do you mean?” 

“They don’t think you’re crazy. Not like me. Nobody would blink twice if you went back out there. So why haven’t you tried again?” It’s pure curiosity, no emotion behind her question, an honest and open desire to know.

“Because I’ve been busy keeping you from trying again.” It’s not the truth, at least not the whole of it, and he can tell she knows it, her lips curling into a smile. She’s just as good at this game as he is.

“Can I see yours?” Her hair has grown out more from where they had to shave it, and she has to tuck some of it back to show him the full line of her scar, still dark and jagged. He’s not sure if she’ll flinch, jerk away if he reaches out, but it’s a relief when she doesn’t, pressing her temple into the cup of his palm.

“I’m sorry, Joel.”

“Nothing to be sorry for, June.” He hopes that if he moves slower this time, only taking what she gives, that she won’t pull away. And she doesn’t, letting his lips brush against hers, a fluttering little thing. He swears he can hear it, something cracking in his chest, ribs breaking to make room for this new swell of warmth as she presses her lips to his again, a little more certain, a little more insistent. Her hand comes to rest at the collar of his shirt, fingers curling into the fabric when he sweeps his tongue along her bottom lip, a question that she responds to in kind, opening up to him with a sweet sigh. 

Sweet, sweet, sweet. No snap, no snarl, just a simple slip of her mouth pressed to his. He’s going to have to ration it, this sweetness, willing himself to pull away before she spooks. His hand is on hers, and her hand is on his, thumbs sweeping, back and forth, back and forth, tracing the secret they share. 

“You hungry?”

“Not really.” 

“Do you want to make dinner?”

“Okay.” 

She’s always not really hungry. He knows by now that it means nothing. And sure enough, he has to hide a smile when she pockets a perfect cherry tomato in her cheek as they start on dinner. 

“There's extra blankets in that closet if you need them. Since it’s getting colder at night and all.” Dinner had been a silent volley of glances, punctuated by long sighs. And now, standing in the hallway, somewhere between his own room and where she’s standing in front of hers, Joel feels completely adrift. 

“Okay, thank you. I think there’s a draft in my window actually. It’s been cold in there these last few nights.”

“I’ll trade for some caulk tomorrow. Get that fixed for you.” Something passes over her face, a quick fall that he finds his mind hurrying to figure out. Oh, oh.

“Would you– my room is plenty warm. I can take the couch.” 

“I don’t want you to take the couch.”

“Okay.” 

He’s already under the covers when she pads into his room, wearing a large sweater and a pair of leggings.

“Are you really that cold?” “I run cold.” He has to bite back a laugh at that, simply nodding, keeping his hands clasped over his chest as she slips into bed on the other side. She’s quick about it, rolling onto her side, facing away from him and tugging the sheets up to her chin.

He tries, he really does, his hands itching in resistance. It feels like a leap, a moment of freefall when he reaches across the mattress, settling his hand on her shoulder. But she catches him, bringing her palm to rest over his, fingers furling in a gentle tug. Come closer, I will not bite, I will not run, not this time. 

The gap is closed with a simple curl of his arm over her waist, his chest slipping snug against her back, rising and falling in time with her thrumming ribs.

“Your feet are really cold.”

“I’m sorry, I told you.”

“That’s okay, June. I don’t mind.” 

[noosayog]

[IT'S ALWAYS BEEN YOU] - ft. knight! iwaizumi hajime

warnings/content: princess! reader x knight/personal guard! iwa. a bit of angst, a little segue into the final chapter. no reader in this part, just a bit of groundwork for the final chapter

wc: 700

part 4.5. directory here.

--

The next course of action is not ideal for Iwaizumi. He has no choice but to return to Aoba Johsai by himself per your orders. And upon his return, he gathers Toru, Hanamaki, and Matsukawa to debrief them on the situation.

Hanamaki and Matsukawa are quick to disparage the foreign prince, calling him a sleazy womanizer and threatening to turn him into fried chicken (a slight to his unruly hair), but Toru remains uncharacteristically quiet.

“Well,” Toru says. “It is not uncommon for royal marriages. And my sister’s marriage is exactly that. Just a union of families and a show of good faith for foreign relations.”

“The Princess deserves to be happy!” Iwaizumi fires back, genuinely shocked at your brother’s clinic response.

Toru tilts his head in confusion. “You couldn’t have not known that this was a possibility with the years you’ve spent with my father.”

Iwaizumi freezes.

“To be honest, Iwa, I’m not sure I can support whatever you’re planning. You had years to act on my sister’s feelings but you always prioritized following father’s orders. How is this any different?” 
“How can you even say that,” he yells. “This is not about me. This is about your sister’s happiness. They aren’t even married yet and the Nekoma prince already has no intentions to make her happy!”

“You could have made her happy. But you chose not to. I fail to see how this is different. Why is okay for you to hurt her but not someone else?”

“I-“

“And,” Toru barrels on. “You don’t know that she won’t be happy. This might actually be a nice arrangement for her. She might finally get the freedom she has always wanted.”

Iwaizumi falls silent at this, all his flimsy excuses sliced cleanly through.

Toru lays a heavy hand on Iwaizumi’s shoulder. “I won’t help you if you’re not willing to admit why you’re really doing all this.” he says with finality, before getting up and leaving the group behind.

—

Iwaizumi drags Hanamaki to the training grounds to clear his head later that evening. The frustration growing a tangled knot in his ribcage shows no signs of loosening as he swings his wooden sword, Toru’s words still echoing.

What more does he need to admit than the shameful acknowledgement that he, your knight, has fallen in love with you and yearns for something above his station?

“- thinking about?” He hears Hanamaki ask.

Iwaizumi grunts, swinging again.

Hanamaki parries the weak blow. “Are you still thinking about what Oikawa said?”

Iwaizumi doesn’t respond, bringing his sword down again. Hanamaki swings easily, knocking Iwaizuimi’s weapon out of his hands.

“I’ll give you a hint. You should think about what happens after. Even if you are able to stop the wedding, what happens to the princess after? She comes back home and His Majesty finds another match for her? Would that make her happy?”

With a hard clap to Iwaizumi’s shoulder, Makki takes off for the night. 

Frustrated, Iwaizumi throws a fist to the ground. Don’t you think he’d entertained the thought of whisking you away the second he realized he loved you? Risk treason to be with you? 

What would make you happy? 

He’s sure now that being able to be together would make you happy. But how could that happen without you abandoning your family, your friends, your beloved home? And he, himself. He didn’t want to leave the knights and Toru behind either. Is it even possible to  find a solution where he could be with you and you both could be with the people you love? 

“You could talk to him, you know?” 

Iwaizumi snaps around at Toru’s voice. 

“My father,” the prince clarifies. “You can convince him of most anything. Can’t you tell by now that he values your opinion more than any of us?” Toru grins ruefully. “Guess your years of being obedient to him have paid off for this moment.” 

Iwaizumi realizes then that while he was hurt from having his value tied to Toru since youth, the King’s words impact Toru equally. His own father, constantly comparing. 

“Let’s do it,” Iwaizumi says, finding courage in the newfound camaraderie with the prince. “I want to make the princess happy.” 

Toru grins, offering his hand. 

Iwaziumi takes it.

[bisexualfemalemess]

BRIDGERTON SEASON THREE PART TWO SPOILERS

I’m actually not ready for this because it’s the last episode of the season and still so angsty but of course it has to be.

Already can’t do this. WHAT DO YOU MEAN THE OPENING SHOT IS COLIN BROODING ON THE SOFA WHILE DRINKING HIS TEA FUCK OFF???? 😭😭😭 Communicate please??? Or at least look at her, colin. I actually can’t handle this. WORST MINUTE OF MY FUCKING LIFE, NOW HE’S FUCKING OFF TO BRIDGERTON HOUSE BECAUSE HE WISHES TO LEAVE????? MAKE UP OR I WILL KILL MYSELF!!!

Fuck off, cressida, not her knowing about lw and black-mailing her??? So much for her redemption arc. Not her telling portia??? Like that’s not your place???? Someone needs to give our baby a break. Aww, portia’s character arc is actually so important to me like not her thinking penelope just always left because her social battery died and she just let her be, that’s actually so cute. I swear if portia turns on her now too i’ll kill myself again, at least we got peneloise back though so maybe i won’t actually. WHY ARE PEOPLE SO PETTY TOWARDS HER ONCE THEY FIND OUT ABOUT WHISTLEDOWN??? LIKE THAT IS STILL THE SAME GIRL YOU KNEW MINUTES BEFOREHAND YOU JUST KNOW MORE ABOUT HER NOW???? At least penelope immediately tells colin this time so he cannot be petty about it.

DOES DANBURY KNOW??? Is this how we get agatha x penelope friendship next season??? Agatha bridgerton coming home????

Ooh a finch x dankworth ball??? Interesting. Oh? Francesca and john moving to scotland?

STOP BROODING COLIN AND TALK TO YOUR WIFE JFC! I love how eloise isn’t choosing sides, our baby girl has truly grown. AH! ELOISE SO TRUE “do not let your marriage be the scar.” Queen behavior, peneloise and polin soulmate-ism. Aww Poor baby pen sounds so tired of all the shit that’s happening to her. I love how they’re trying to figure out how to get penelope out of this situation and i love how colin ‘my wife’ bridgerton made an appearance even though he’s angry with her, 🗣️ He will not stand for anyone blackmailing his wife 🗣️ they’re all so shocked that baby girl’s filthy rich. ALSO LET HER FUCKING SPEAK. this is her mess, she was not looking for help just support and all of a sudden her opinions don’t matter anymore :( Y’all need to let go of your anger towards lw and try to support pen instead of trying to fight her battles for her. She’s just standing in the corner watching as they’re talking about her and what to do :( at least involve her, don’t ignore her and cut her off. Jesusss.

And Benedict’s having a threesome again, interesting but unnecessary.

Protective Colin bridgerton but he’s still angry with her :( “to hear word from home. From penelope, in fact.” STFUUUU STFUUU STFUUU JUST MAKE UP ALREADY WE DON’T NEED ALL THIS YEARNING AND ANGST AND PINING WE GOT ENOUGH OF IT IN PART ONE :((( Aside from that I’m actually so fucking happy that he essentially just called penelope his home, I’m actually gonna combust. I hate how he’s still trying to separate penelope from whistledown “penelope’s no villain” and then he goes on to say that he gets her hate for whistledown???? Did we not just learn that they were the same person, colin? CRESSIDA I STILL FEEL INDIFFERENT TOWARDS YOU BUT BLESS YOU FOR CLOCKING HIS TEA!!!!! “You do not sound as if you hate whistledown. You sound as if you are jealous of her.” PREACH IT! He shut that shit down to fast, like the moment he’s gonna admit that to himself he’s gonna be able to forgive her. THAT FUCK ASS WIG I HATE IT SO MUCH. PLEASE THE RESHOOT WIG MAKES HIM LOOK LIKE A KEN DOLL LIKE ITS SO PLASTIC 😭😭😭😭

PENELOISE SCENE I LOVE THAT THEY’RE BACK. “tell me what you are reading?”With eloise grabbing her hand? 🥹🥹🥹🥹🥹 WAR IS SO TRULY OVER. Colin literally fucked up so bad, not cressida asking for double 🙄🙄🙄 Also penelope’s dress in this scene is so gorgeous. Aww, he’s willing to lie to Benedict for his wife so that the cressida drama can stop. PLEASE JUST MAKE UP YOU IDIOTS. Awwww eloise grabbing her hand in support. I just know peneloise and polin will mirror the christina x meredith x derek dynamic from grey’s with Eloise just bursting into their home unannounced and colin will understand but still be so tired of it.

STOP CUTTING TO BENEDICT THREESOMES THEY HAVE NOTHING TO ADD TO THE STORY IN THIS EPISODE 😭😭😭😭😭

Honestly the lady danbury and violet friendship is so special to me like violet did not care that she was running around with her dad and Agatha loves her more than her brother, that’s so cute.

STOP IT RIGHT NOW THE POLIN SCENE LIKE HE WANTED HER AND HE LOVES HER BUT HE CANT BE WITH HER UNTIL EVERYTHINGS FULLY OKAY BETWEEN THEN BECAUSE HE’S A DEMI SEXUAL KING. THEY NEED TO MAKE UP SO BAD SO THAT THEY CAN MAKE UP FOR THEIR WEDDING NIGHT.

STOP IT HE LOOKS SO DISTRAUGHT SLEEPING ON THE COUCH AND PENELOPE FIDDLING AROUND WITH HER BRACELET AS SHE SAYS SHES GONNA SPARE HIM THE CONFIDES OF A SHARED CARRIAGE ACTUALLY SHUT UO THE ANGST IS TOO MUCH :(

AWW PENELOPE’S LETTERS MADE A COMEBACK. THE FACT THAT HE KEPT ALL OF HER LETTERS WHERE IS MY COLIN BRIDGERTON????

PENELOPE MY QUEEN GETTING TO SEE SOME OF HER MOMS WORST SIDES AND POPPING OFF ON HER. Mother-daughter bitch off! “Oh and from whom?” Well, her family actually. Portia crediting penelope and apologizing for overlooking her, the development is so cute. “We must do better.” So true actually and the fact that it’s coming from portia just shows her development.

Francesca’s wedding was actually so beautiful and her heart to heart with violet beforehand was so cute. Polin sharing a look during francesca’s and john’s wedding and penelope subtly touching him with her shoulder, i’m gonna throw up. STOP THE ANGST.

the bridgerton siblings being chaotic and teasing each other is something so dear to my heart actually.

Penelope’s outfits this episode are all actually so gorgeous, she looks so ethereal in this season in general but especially in this episode. No not her seeing a genuine smile on colin’s face during their wedding party and her smile slowly fading. The angst is angsting.

Aww penelope loves his family so much. The study scene is actually so… “then how am i meant to help you?” “By loving me!” Pop off, pen. Might need to bash his head into a wall a couple times though because our baby boy is very stubborn right now. Like it’s so special to me, her speech is sooo dear to my heart. HANDS, HANDS, HANDS! 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺

Oh? Penelope writing to the queen AND Violet? What is going to happen?

Lmaooo Benedict got one taste of men and he could not stop. I’m actually crying, my favorite pansexual, (i love you but please stop taking screen-time from polin during their own damn season the irony of people complaining polin got too much screen time last season and now during their own season they barely get as much scenes as the previous leads) IM CRYING BENEDICT DOES NOT GIVE A FUCK ABOUT THAT WOMAN LMAOOO.

Aww a benedict and eloise swing scene, so on brand. Real el back not giving a fuck about fitting in anymore because she got pen back. ELOISE IS A LESBIAN I CANNOT STRESS THIS ENOUGH AND I WISH BENEDICT SHARED WHAT HE FOUND OUT WITH ELOISE SO THAT SHE WOULD KNOW THAT IT’S OKAY 😭😭😭

Penelope’s ball dress looks so gorgeous. AWW SHE PAID FOR THE BALL 😭😭😭😭 SHE’S SUCH AN AMAZING SISTER DESPITE ALL THE SHIT THEY’VE SAID AND DONE TO HER OVER THE YEARS. Not my poor baby standing on the sidelines again 😭😭😭 Where’s colin when you need him???

Oh, the queen showed up. SHE’S PISSED???? PENELOPE WHAT HAVE YOU DONE??? AWWW. Penelope revealing herself to the ton, girl boss. Her entire speech is her admitting her flaws and defending herself in the same breath. She’s one of the best, if not, the best written character on the show and it is about time the haters realize that. The fact that she keeps eye contact with El and Colin while defending herself but also assuring them about their own insecurities while doing so 😭😭😭 I’m crying, Colin actually smiled at her, he looks so proud of his wife 😭😭😭 Stfuuuu. Are we getting that make-up? PENELOPE MY QUEEN INTO THE LIGHT INDEED! AWW THE QUEEN ACTUALLY PARDONED HER OH MY GOD.

The ton needs to stop whispering if you have anything to say, say it to her face, The Featheringtons showing support and phillipa demanding that varley releases the bugs to save her sister from embarrassment 😭😭😭

Colin i’m so serious when i say go to your wife and ask her to dance. AWW THE DANBURY-PENELOPE SCENE. I have hopes for a friendship in season 4. She knew all along and kept the secret 🥹🥹🥹 “who loves the Bridgertons more than I” Especially her soulmates colin and eloise 🥺🥺🥺🥺 Aww penelope and her mother are actually so important to me “my girl” OH MY GOD THAT SCENE FROM THE TRAILER WHERE SHE LOOKS SO FONDLY AT SOMEONE AND THEN TURNS TO SEE COLIN WAS WITH PORTIA. SHUT UP THATS SO CUTE.

She looks so worried, please make-up i swear to god. “That i would not object to an annulment if you requested one.” COLIN WE HAVE 14 MINUTES LEFT IF YOU DO NOT SHUT THAT SHIT DOWN AFTER EVERYTHING SHE’S DONE TO SHOW YOU SHE CARES I AM PERSONALLY GONNA BASH YOUR HEAD INTO A WALL REPEATEDLY.

Oh never mind, the shock on his face, like that was never even a thought to him. He was always gonna stay married to her. FINALLY “you are her.” It took him a while to get there but he finally accepted that part of her and it’s so cute. His speech is actually so…he’s such a healthy male character, the only man ever actually, like you will not be able to find a man that is so in touch with their feelings that he can admit he was jealous and that you’re actually a braver, better person than he is. COLIN BRIDGERTON THE MAN THAT YOU ARE🗣️🗣️🗣️🗣️ this speech is so dear to me.

STFUU THE PARALLEL TO EPISODE ONE

Episode 1: “Goodbye, Mr.Bridgerton”

“Pen, i….”

Episode 8:

“You are a very good man, mr. Bridgerton.”

“Now, will you please do me the honor of joining me on the dance floor, Mrs. Bridgerton.”

STFUUU HE ACTUALLY CALLED HER MRS BRIDGERTON THAT IS A WIN FOR ME. Them dancing together will always have a special place in my heart, especially since everything’s resolved and they’re all giggly.

Oh, Eloise moving to scotland with francesca, oh my god. OH??? Francesca bridgerton, i know what you are and Michaela stirling i did not realize your game. Welcome to the sapphic club, fran.

OH????? Penelope riding colin!!!! Yay! I wish they kept in the longer version of the scene since this was apparently originally part of a montage but i’m so glad they finally got their shit together and consummated their marriage. Penelope loves colin’s chest hair so much.

OOOOH? Masquerade ball. Ben’s season next?

Pen’s and eloise goodbye hug was so long actually, they’re the cutest. Penelope’s little wave to her, my peneloise heart 🥹🥹🥹

“Goodbye.” SHUT UP

Oh my gosh, the epilogue. Polin had the heir so fucking cute. THEIR MARITAL BLISS IN THE EPILOGUE THEY’RE SO SICKENING ACTUALLY. Aww phillipa wants her daughter to be a writer so cute. POLIN WRITER COUPLE AND PENELOPE SUPPORTING HER HUSBAND IN WRITING AND PUBLISHING SO TRUE . NO STOP THE TRANSITION FROM JULIE ANDREWS TO PENELOPE’S VOICE WAS ACTUALLY GENIUS I’M GONNA THROW UP.

ALSO THE SYMBOLISM OF PENELOPE AND COLIN HAVING THEIR FINAL KISS BASKED IN SUNLIGHT IN FRONT OF THE WINDOW WHERE SHE USED TO SPENT HOURS TRYING TO SPY INTO HIS ROOM IM GONNA CHAIN MYSELF TO A TRAIN TRACK ACTUALLY.

Yours truly, Penelope Bridgerton

That’s it, i’m checking myself into a mental hospital now. What the actual fuck.

Wow. Awww guys all i want is playing during the credits that’s so cute 🥰

I actually don’t know what to do with myself for another two years until we learn what these characters are up to again. Like this season was actually so special to me i am dying for more especially more polin since they cut that short for some benedict awakenings and setting up for his season but i am glad for the bits that we did get.

Overall i do not have too much criticism for this season so i give it a solid 9.5/10

[officialleehadan]

Thirty-Nine

Hello darlings! Today's story was brought to you by Hel! Darling, thank you so much for all your support!

Prompt: Looping Souls

+++

Thirty-nine loops in, Tiago finally managed to track down the attackers who would hit the tower. A call, arranged three loops ago, made sure another team was on hand to intercept them, and hit the headquarters to find out what they knew.

The nice thing about being in a time loop was that if they failed, Tiago would know for the next loop, and could adjust.

The worst thing about being in a time loop was that none of the people involved would remember any of it for the next one.

At least he was getting faster at getting everyone in place when he needed them to be.

After several conversations with Eyes-High, a powerful and well-connected technopath who specialize in information-gathering, he had more answers than before. Unfortunately, he didn’t have enough answers.

So today they were meeting in person, and she was going to try and help him find Conatus.

“You sure you want to do this?” Eyes-High asked warily. She was, for a large number of very reasonable reasons, not thrilled to be reaching out to the notorious villain. Conatus wasn’t known to be unstable or insane, but he also didn’t tent to play with his food. If she, or Tiago, annoyed him, he could and would kill them. “He’s very, very dangerous, and he doesn’t pull his punches.”

“You say that like you have experience,” Tiago noted and caught her coffee cub before she could knock it off the table. Eyes-High twitched at his preemptive movement. She was also unhappy about the time loop business, but she was willing to play her part as best she could to make sure that they all got out of the loop alive. “You know him?”

“We’ve worked together a time or two,” Eyes-High admitted uncomfortably. Not surprising. She was supposed to be on the hero’s side of things.  Working with a known villain was not the best way to stay in the shiny public eye. Not that she bothered with that much anyway. Eyes-High was specifically a support Power by her own insistence, and almost never saw combat. “Last time was when Hurracules called down that cat-five power-amped blizz-hurricane on the eastern seaboard.”

Tiago remembered that. The storm would have wiped out nearly everything it hit. Every Power who wasn’t directly involved in creating it joined up to try and prevent it, or at least save lives as they could. Tiago suspected one of the villains got ahold of Hurracules, who was a high-test weather-control Power, since no one heard of him since that storm. It might even have been Conatus. Maybe Tiago would ask if he met the man.

“That was all-hands-on-deck,” he told Eyes-High, who nodded, visibly relieved that he wasn’t going to make problems for her just because she worked with a villain once in a while during an emergency. “If Horizon didn’t bust you for it, I’m not gonna. You know my history.”

“I do,” she admitted, more knowing than he liked, but she handled information. There was no way she let something that important slip her net. “Anyway, Conatus. He’s easy to work with, but don’t cross him. He’s mostly polite about staying out of people’s heads, but he won’t hesitate if you give him a reason to kill you. He can cause brain hemorrhage as long as he’s close enough to sense you. Don’t ask me how far that is. I don’t know his max range.”

“What’s his known range?”

“I’ve personally seen him tag someone from more than a thousand feet, but I don’t know if that’s his max, or if he needs sightline for it. I wouldn’t count on either, especially if he’s angry.”

Not further than Tiago’s own kill-range, but more than most Powers on the field, and almost impossible to block. It was valuable knowledge. He would have to be very careful not to give Conatus a reason to take him as a threat.

“How do I find him?” Tiago asked, since that was the most important thing. “I don’t have time for a message drop.”

“That’s the problem,” Eyes-High said with a wince. “I don’t know. He’s in the city. I think he lives somewhere downtown, but he knows my mind, and I’m not interested in having my brain crushed like a grape. I stay away from him.”

Right. Well, that was… reasonable but unhelpful. “How likely is he to be able to help me?”

“Very, I’m sorry to say. He’s better than me. Bigger setup. Much richer. More contacts on both sides of the field.”

That might be an option.

“Who does he associate with?” Tiago said, again resentfully grateful for the large part of his forcibly-trained mind that knew how to plan a mission. This was no different than hunting a difficult assassination target, except he wasn’t planning a murder at the end. “Anyone he might take a call from?”

“He might take a call from Aloe. I know they’re friends,” Eyes-High named one of the more powerful healers on the villain side who was, Tiago knew, in the service of the city’s more powerful villain alliance. The healer himself was not aligned with either side, but he was notoriously hard to find, due to his position with the villains. He knew too much about them for them to let him be brought in to testify against them. Not that Tiago thought Aloe would do any such thing. Healers took their business seriously, and if Aloe wanted to turn on his villains, he would have done it already. “But you’ll have to find him to try for it.”

“Every part of this is a mission to find someone who doesn’t want to be found,” Tiago muttered, but he took a hit off his cold coffee, grabbed Eyes-High before she could fall when her chair broke under her unexpectedly, and reached for the nearest tabled. “Right. Let’s see if we can find Aloe in a hurry. I have it on good authority that we all die at three PM.”

+++

Looping Souls: (FULL COLLECTION)

Fifty-Seven (Subscriber Only!)

Fifty-One

Three

Twelve

Thirty 

Thirty-Nine

Fifty-Two

Fifty (New!)

+++

MASTERLIST

[gothamstreetcat]

Hi everyone, I know everyone is going through some pretty severe times right now, but recently I’ve found myself in a rough predicament. A week ago I suffered a pretty severe fall, where I fell 20ft off an overpass. It was really dark, raining pretty hard, and there were no traffic lights where I was at. I could barley see in front of me and I didn’t have on my glasses because they were useless at the time. I was walking home.

Because of the fall I hurt my back and chest pretty bad and I wasn’t able to move myself much when I was first admitted. I also broke my heel which resulted in surgery. Between the EMT’s finding me, the ambulance ride to the hospital, and being admitted it was extremely disorienting, scary, and frustrating.

Due to the surgery I will be out of work for a minimum of three months but probably more. I am unable to put weight on my foot for those three months and even after that it will be very hard - if you’ve ever broken a bone before you know it’s no joke. And if you live in the US, you also know what a rip-off our healthcare system is. I had not even reached my own outrageous deductible before this occurred and I’m not even sure what my insurance is even going to cover after that. I will also have to pay for physical therapy and on top of everything, I just got a notice for my rent going above 1k - which is extremely outrageous where I live.

I am also being moved into a psychiatric facility under the false assumptions that a jumped off the overpass. Despite that there was no evidence before or after the incident that supports this assumption. I have tried time and time again to prove how unfair this is to me to no avail. While being in the hospital on suicide watch, they confiscated all my belongings (despite that I could barley move in the bed due to how much pain I was in) and have since lost my wallet, keys, shoes during this time.

I have some money saved up in an account and enough paid time off to late me a month but I know it’s not going to be enough to sustain me being out of work.

I have spent so much of my life doing for others. Helping them, making things for them and doing for them all because I care about them and like to make them happy. I don’t regret any of it - it is truly one of the few things that bring me joy in this world, but now I need to ask for some help.

I’ve been on this site for a long time making gifs. I also do lots of crafts, like modifying jackets, making buttons, and painting. I write fanfiction and have made some fan videos over on YouTube. I plan to do some jackets and painting to try and cultivate a source of income while I am not working, but I am worried it won’t be enough.

I am willing to do commissions for stories and videos if anyone in interested. (But please keep it literally within my capabilities, I know it’s so limited but I’d be willing to go to the depths of hell if someone would pay me for it). I am also open to gifset requests. And I would be open to selling some of my art on here.

I have also set up a ko-fi for small donations and here is a link to my PayPal.

I know everyone hates these kinds of posts and there are A LOT of people in A LOT worse situations than my own. But I would literally be so appreciative of any support anyone is willing to give.

If you have any questions, comments or concerns/want to know more about my fall - please feel free to ask me. Thank you all for listening and those who have been supportive thus far.

Here is some of the work I’ve done:

[itstheoneshot]

Kinktober Day 31

Breeding - Suho

!dom Suho

It isn’t often that Junmyeon gets pent up, you are usually so interested, so willing, that he never has to wait, but it has been almost three weeks now since your last encounter and you are seeing a side of him that you so rarely see.

First, you had an exceptionally bad period, in pain for days beforehand, you then bled for a week, and just when it started to cease, you had a two week long business trip with your company, separating you and Junmyeon even further.

You were antsy too, desperate and pining as soon as you saw him, both of you could not stop touching one another, stripping you both of your clothes within minutes, and Junmyeon so quickly carried you to the bedroom, wanting and needing to make up for lost time.

“Don’t ever leave me for that long again,” Junmyeon orders as he places you down onto the bed, “I can’t be without you ever.”

He spreads your legs to fit between them as you shuffle backwards, begging him to follow. His cock is already fully hard, in fact you had teased him about it when you first started kissing as you arrived home, but now you are ready too, with his fingers at your hole, warming you up to take him is a breeze.

“I won’t,” You shake your head, “Hurts too much, miss you too much when I’m away.”

You arch your back as he curls two fingers inside you, as you simultaneously reach forward to wrap a hand around his cock. You understand that he needs to prepare you, but right now all you can think about is having more.

“Baby,” He warns you, his eyes closing for a moment as you begin to stroke, “I’m not going to be able to hold back if you keep doing that.”

You smirk at him when he looks at you again, well aware of what he is like, having years and years of relationship with him under your belt, you know exactly what you are doing to him.

“Oh, really?” You ask, gripping a little tighter, “That would be a shame.”

His eyes darken, your unspoken permission lighting a fire in him that is unstoppable. You have him where you want him, and he has you there too.

“Don’t go again,” He repeats, “You’re mine, and mine only.”

You nod as his fingers work a little faster, and your breath catches in your throat as he suddenly stops, to then wrap his hand around yours and guide his cock to your now ready entrance. You nod again, agreeing with him, happily admitting he is and will always be the only one for you.

“I’m gonna knock you up this time, baby,” He murmurs, “Get you pregnant so you can never leave.”

The moan that you exert is loud and broken as he thrusts into you, hard and fast for the first movement, and the tempo stays the same. You lift a leg up over his hip quickly to give him deeper access, and you wrap your hands around his neck to keep you steady.

“Please, Myeon,” You gasp, “Want it, want everyone to know that I’m yours.”

The sounds that Junmyeon makes range from groans, sighs, to downright growls as he fucks you, taking and taking with a purpose, to both make you feel good and to fill his own desires.

“Gonna get you all pretty and swollen,” He continues, massaging your breasts with one hand as the other supports his weight, “Leaking milk, hyper-emotional, needing me more than ever.”

You cry out as he hits your cervix with a particularly hard thrust, your body jolting with the force as he then hits the sensitive nerves inside you with the next. He fills you so well, and he fucks you even better, the dirty talk satiating his biggest kink is only an added bonus.

“Daddy,” You whimper, “Fuck a baby into me, daddy, want you to knock me up over and over again.”

Junmyeon’s eyes roll back with his moan, he loves it so much when you indulge him, and so do you. He takes his hand to your cheek to admire you for a minute as he continues to bring you closer to peak, and then he moves his hand away, now settling at your clit to give you the extra pleasure that you need.

“You want it, don’t you?” He teases you, “You just want to be used to make Daddy’s beautiful babies?”

You moan at the thought, fuelling his desires as he fulfills yours too. Your body begins to clench as his thrusts start to stagger, his release coming much quicker than he has planned. It is not surprising after such a stint of waiting, that both of you want to finish so that you can rest and start again as soon as you can.

“Yes!” You cry as your high washes over you, “Get me pregnant, Daddy!”

———

Kinktober Masterlist!

[lurkingshan]

Love Mate

When @bengiyo informed me that the creative team behind Our Dating Sim had released another show, I knew immediately I would have to check it out (attn: @troubled-mind). And I’m happy to report that I really loved Love Mate!

The basic premise: Yi Jun doesn’t believe in love and is determined to be single forever. Ha Ram is his new junior at work who has a crush on him and is determined to prove him wrong. Shenanigans ensue!

This is a really classic romance story and the show heavily deploys all your favorite tropes from romance, bl, and kdramas, but in a knowing way that lets you in on the fun. The leads are great and have really solid chemistry. And importantly, like ODS, this show has managed to calibrate its pacing and story ambitions appropriately to fit its short length. The narrative is complete and satisfying and it was a really delightful few hours of a binge.

Getting into spoiler territory here so only read on if you don’t mind!

I’ve seen a bit of chatter in the tags about whether Ha Ram went too far in his aggressive pursuit of Yi Jun and transgressed his boundaries inappropriately. I get why that conversation is happening but I didn’t feel that way and wanted to dig into why.

First, like I mentioned above, this is a really classic romance set up that is using very recognizable tropes, and the character types and dynamic between them is no exception. Yi Jun is claiming not to believe in love, but you can see almost immediately - and the show confirms over time - that he is actually a wounded baby bird who desperately wants love but is trying to protect himself from getting hurt again. Ha Ram is the love interest who sees through him - we find out later why he is so confident this isn’t really who Yi Jun is and why he is so determined about him - and takes it upon himself to give Yi Jun the attention and care he clearly needs. These archetypes are rooted in tradition and if you’re familiar with the genre you know the basic sketch of how this is going to go before the first episode ends.

Second, it was apparent right away that Yi Jun 1) liked Ha Ram; 2) wanted his attention; 3) was enjoying being pursued despite his protestations. In the first few episodes we saw him getting flustered, looking at and thinking about Ha Ram constantly, and intentionally putting himself in Ha Ram’s path even as he verbally claimed he wasn’t into it. Yi Jun even admits all of this explicitly once they’re dating, but to me it was clear just from his body language and reactions. After asking for some time to think before he decides if he wants to date him, Yi Jun cracks after literally one (1) day without Ha Ram’s attention. Once they start being “date mates” Yi Jun blooms right in front of our eyes. He is happy again, finding joy in life, relaxing quite naturally into this relationship even if he won’t call it that yet. And when his ex comes back and sends him back into a spiral and he starts avoiding Ha Ram, we see his spirit dim and the light go out of his eyes. Ha Ram is good for Yi Jun and the show makes it super clear. And it makes perfect sense, because for someone who was harshly dumped the way Yi Jun was in the past, someone pursuing him that relentlessly, and still wanting him even when he makes it difficult, would be a much needed balm for his ego, a boost to his confidence, and the assurance he would need before he’d be willing to risk getting hurt again.

Third, Ha Ram is an emotionally intelligent character that can tell the difference between Yi Jun “playing hard to get” while still seeking his attention, and Yi Jun actually being very upset and wanting time away from him. And when Ha Ram is faced with the latter, he backs off. He knows something is going on with the ex and he is upset about Yi Jun pushing him away, but ultimately he gives him space to wallow and only intervenes when he is being hurt. And in the end, he offers his support and care to bolster Yi Jun, and again gives Yi Jun the space to get the closure he needs on his own.

I could probably ramble on about this show and these characters all day (which is telling given when a short watch it is!) but I would rather just tell you to go watch it. It’s not perfect, but it’s truly a lovely story and worth your time.

[elisysd]

48. Knew we would crash at the speed that we were going

Masterlist - Previously - Next

Chapter soundtrack: Dangerously - Charlie Puth

The following weeks after the boat discussion had been a mix between trying to mend her broken heart and her new journey to recovery. She had spent a lot of time with her family, enjoying their presence without trying to talk about work, and long conversations on the phone with her best friend. She was slowly feeling her old self coming back and it felt nice. She was still sometimes thinking about Ethan and it would have been a lie to say that she had never tried to gather information on his whereabouts through Romy but the German driver had not once answered her unspoken questions. She was also sometimes finding herself scrolling through her gallery photo to look at some of the pictures of her and Ethan and often she was scolding herself to stop. She still had to make the transfer but she was dreading it. It was the only link she still had with Ethan and the idea to cut it was something she had a hard time coming to terms with.

An unexpected friendship had also been formed between her and Martin, something she had never thought would have taken such a place in her life. He was there anytime she needed someone to talk to about her deepest fears or when she needed to talk about Ethan. He was there. Never judging her, trying to understand the best he could and giving her advice she was not willing to follow even though she knew it would be best for her. He was a comforting presence in her life. The fact that he was always there while she had her session with his physiotherapist had also brought them closer. She was making progress really fast and even if it was painful and tough, she was doing her best and she was proud of herself. It was something that was happening a lot more these past few weeks. She was trying to find something she could be proud of on a daily basis, whether it was that she managed to get out of the bed in the morning at a decent hour or that she was able to hold a pen and write despite her stiff wrist. It was probably the only advice from Martin she was willingly following. He had told her it had helped him a lot after Cecile’s death, to find joy in the most mundane things. It seemed futile at first but she had to admit it had been a good idea.

And today she would need all the positive things she could find. She was finally getting rid of her crutches, and it was time for her to learn how to find her balance without them. It was stressing her out, she felt like she was not ready. It was too soon, what if she fell and was breaking her leg again.  It was with thousands of questions that she left the house to find Martin’s Ferrari in the driveway. As usual, he helped her get in the car and put on her favorite playlist on the speakers before finally driving to the gym.

“How do you feel about walking all by yourself again?” he asked, seeing her tense.

“Anxious as hell. I’m scared to fall, I’m scared of hurting myself, I’m scared of not knowing how to walk and I feel stupid.”

“Enrico asked me to help you. I’ll be there to support you. Physically and mentally.”

“I don’t want you to miss your training because of me. I don’t want to be…”

“If you say, burden, I’m dropping you here and there and you walk alone to the gym.” he cut her and she sighed.

“I was not about to say burden.”

“Sure, you weren’t. Remind me the three things I asked you to tell yourself every day?”

“Martin…” she moaned in annoyance.

“Julia…” he replied in the same tone.

“Fine. I’m worthy. I’m important. I’m loved.” she said, rolling her eyes.

“Good. Now, a little bit more convinced, please.”

“You won’t give up, right?”

“I’m doing that for you. Go on. Speak, Leclerc.”

She breathed in and out, closed her eyes and repeated a few times her new mantra  until Martin finally stopped annoying her. She wouldn’t admit it out loud, but it felt nice to say it. Maybe he was right, if she was repeating it enough she would start to believe it. They parked in front of the gym and Julia felt a little frightened when a few people approached Martin to ask for pictures which he gladly took. She didn’t dare to get out of the car, trying to hide herself from them. The last thing she wanted was to spark dating rumors with Martin. When the little group left, Martin rushed to the car to help her get out and guided her inside. Enrico was finishing preparing everything and smiled when he saw Julia.

“Martin, I wrote you a list of exercises today, mainly cardio and neck training . It's in the room next door. Julia, today is the day, can I have these? You won’t need them after today.” Enrico explained as Martin nodded and kissed Julia’s cheek, wishing her good luck before leaving.

Julia handed him her crutches and sat down on the bench as he left her so she could change and put her shorts on. When he came back she was laying on the medical table. He talked to her, trying to understand how she was feeling as he was massaging her leg and stretching it. She clenched her jaw, trying to not complain and to not focus on the pain. It lasted a good hour and half before Enrico deemed it okay to take the next step.

“Time to walk, little miss.”

She sat on the edge of the table and gulped. It was time. She felt the panic rising in her and her head throbbing as she contemplated the ground.

“It’s just a few steps.”

“I’m not sure I’m ready.” she said.

“You are. I wouldn’t make you walk if I didn’t think you were not able to do it.”

“But I don’t feel ready. My leg is not strong enough, I will just fall and…”

“Your leg isn’t strong enough because you don’t use it. All the stretching and massages of the past weeks were meant to prepare this moment. So stand up, Julia.”

She hated the way he was talking to her, as if she was a spoiled kid. She closed her eyes and slowly stood on her leg, hanging to the table as if it was her lifebuoy. And, when she tried to move, she felt herself being paralyzed by fear. She couldn’t. It was a bad idea. She shook her head and sat back on the table. She heard Enrico sighing and leaving the room and she felt guilty to disappoint him. He came back a moment later with Martin who was sweaty and out of breath from having spent almost an hour and half training non-stop.

“Martin will help you. I’ll leave you with him.  I’m giving you an hour and when I come back I want you to have done one hundred steps. Do it the way you want to but that is the result I want to have by the end of our session. Are we clear?”

She nodded, fighting back tears of frustration.

“I didn’t hear you. I expect an answer when I’m asking a question, Julia. I said, are we clear?”

“Very, Enrico.” she replied.

“Good.”

When he left, the room was silent. Only both of their respiration could be heard until she felt Marin taking a chair and sitting in front of her.

“I’m right by your side. We are going to do it. Together. I won’t let you fall, Juls.”

“Why is it so hard? It shouldn’t be this hard! It’s just walking!” she was getting angry at herself.

“It’s not supposed to be easy either. But I’ll help you. I promise. So, let’s go?”

She gulped but took his hand, standing once again. She straightened herself, trying to ignore the pain she could feel in her leg. She took a deep breath and opened her eyes to meet Martin’s.

“It’s great Julia, see you are standing. Now we are going to take a step forward. I’m not letting go of your hand, I promise, not until you tell me I can.”

And slowly she did. One step after the other, trying to find her balance. She almost fell a few times but Martin was always there to catch her. Soon they arrived on the other side of the room. It had only been twenty steps but she felt as if she had run a marathon. She was exhausted.

“Now I’m going to take a few steps back without holding your hands, okay? I’m not far.”

It took her a few minutes to stop touching the wall to keep her steady and slowly, focusing on Martin’s voice and on her breathing she managed to make her way to him. The more she was walking, the more confident she was feeling to the point she asked Martin to stand to the opposite side of the room. It was a lot of steps to take but she could do it. She was strong enough. She kept her eyes on him and slowly moved. It was hard, it was hurting but she felt so damn proud of herself, she was walking, she was doing it and she could see how Martin was equally proud of her. He opened his arms to her and as she was about to rush in, she could feel her ankle twist and soon she felt the cold floor underneath her. She didn’t move, trying to register what had happened. The pain was not there anymore, replaced by the anger and frustration against herself. She wasn’t even able to stand on her own. She was feeling pathetic. And she only had herself to blame. If only she hadn’t been such a coward with Ethan, if only she wasn’t so attached to please everyone so no one would get hurt because of her, if only she hadn’t been such a control freak when it came to feelings, if only she had been more open with him, if only she hadn’t been selfish, she wouldn’t be in this position. The accident wouldn’t have happened and she would be happy with Ethan.

She felt a warm hand on her cheek and when she opened her eyes it was the two green orbs instead of the ice blue one she had pictured in her mind that were in front of her.

“Julia! Are you hurt?”

“Not physically.” she mumbled.

“Come on, I’ll help you get up.”

“No. I don’t want to. I’m useless, I’m pathetic, you’re wasting your time with me, leave me alone.”

“Self pity won’t lead you anywhere.”

“It’s not self-pity, it’s called being realistic.” she said, looking away and she felt Martin’s other hand on her other cheek, forcing her to focus on him.

“I won’t let you go back to whatever dark place your mind is crawling to.” he whispered.

She couldn’t help the few tears to roll down her cheeks, quickly caught by Martin.

“I’m sick of crying.” she confessed.

“I prefer to see you cry in front of me than for you to do it all alone.”

She looked at him sadly, her eyes boring into his. He was so close she could see the different nuances of green in his eyes. They were looking at her with calm, peacefulness when she knew she was looking at him tormented. His breathing was slow when hers was erratic. His body felt warm when hers was cold. She put a shaking hand on his chest, feeling his heart beat fast. She slowly fumbled with the thin material as his hands were still slowly caressing her cheeks, unconsciously. She didn’t know if she was the one who got closer or if it was him or it was both of them but she could now feel his breath on her lips and when she inclined her face, bumping his nose with hers she was sure she felt his heart missing a beat. She leaned in a bit, unsure of what she was doing. She just knew he made her feel safe, good about herself. And finally her lips found his. He didn’t move at first, too stunned to react. And as he was about to pull away, Julia tried to hold onto him, throwing her arms around his neck. It felt wrong, so wrong she knew that but she couldn’t stop herself.

“Julia…” he breathed against her lips. “We can’t. You’re not in the right stand of mind… you’re hurting and Ethan…”

“Please… I just want to forget. Forget the pain and forget him.” she whispered, a lump in her throat.

“You’re not fair.”

“I know.” she admitted.

She felt him trying to pull back, trying to resist but it didn’t last long as soon she felt his hands around her waist and his lips back on hers, making her gasp. He let his hands wander along her body, as light as a feather, trying to be careful, attentive to each one of her moves and sounds. She let him explore her mouth, letting him take what he wanted to take from her. She felt his mouth on her jaw, moving up her cheek to her nose to her forehead before coming back to her lips. He was so delicate as if she was about to break. And right when she thought she was ready to abandon herself to his embrace, blond hair and piercing blue eyes came to her mind and made her choke. Suddenly the kisses were not as feverish as Ethan’s, Martin’s hands were not as rough as him, the warmth of his body was not making her feel as safe as Ethan’s. She pulled away and crawled to the other side of the room. Martin was about to say something when Enrico came back, oblivious to what had just happened and Julia had never been this happy to see him.

The ride back home felt awkward. She had been ready to take the bus but she knew Martin wouldn’t have let her, instead she sat back in the car and focused on the outside. She could see, from the corner of her eyes, his knuckles clinging to the steering wheel and she swore he had been about to say something a few times before stopping himself. When he parked in front of her house, he didn’t unlock the door straight away.

“Julia, we should talk about what happened back then.”

“It shouldn’t have happened. That was stupid and in the heat of the moment. I’m sorry.”

“I don’t think I can do that, Julia…” he said, looking straight in front of him.

“Do what?”

“Be your friend. I thought I could, and I genuinely wanted to be that for you. But I can’t. Because when you look at me the way you looked at me in this freaking gym, the feelings and thoughts I had were everything but friendly. And I don’t want to mess with you. You still love Ethan and…”

“Then help me to unlove him.” she almost begged him.

“I don’t want to be a pawn in whatever game you are playing, Julia.”

“It’s just…I want to forget him.I want to stop being hurt and when I’m with you I…I feel nice. I don’t know what it means, I just know that I don’t want to lose what you make me feel.”

“I feel weak because when you look at me like that I can’t say no to you. That’s how down bad I am for you.”

“Is it a bad thing?” she slowly asked.

“I don’t know. It depends on you.”

“Can we take it slow? If we decide to explore this, I want to take it slow. And I want Ethan to know first. I don’t want him to learn it from someone or through social media.”

“Your pace is mine.”

She nodded, fidgeting with her red bracelet. She didn’t know if it was a good idea but the only thing she was sure about was that she was willing to do anything to move on and try to forget Ethan.

“We have to go to Maranello tomorrow to work on the sim… do you still want us to go together?”

“Yeah, of course.” she replied.

“Okay, then I’ll come here tomorrow to get you and maybe we can have dinner at my place after the session? Like… a first date? Officially.” he told her, unsure of how she would react.

She simply nodded before finally getting out of the car, his time without his help. Her mom quickly picked up that something must have happened as she barely ate and spoke at the table, and as soon as he stood up to go to her room, her mom was quick to follow her.

“What is wrong with you?” Lyanna asked as her daughter was throwing her crutches away and fell on her bed, face against her pillow.

Julia looked at her mom, her face emotionless and Lyanna knew straight away that her daughter was falling into past unhealthy habits that she thought were far behind her. When Lyanna was faced with a deafening silence, she felt powerless. She sat next to her daughter who slowly turned around to crawl to her mother’s arms.

“I hate myself, mom.” she simply answered.

“Talk to me, sweetheart… please, I don’t like to see you like that.”

“I just want the pain to go away. I don’t want to feel anything, anymore.”

Lyanna didn’t know what else to do but to hug her even more.

“Can I ask you something?”

“Everything you want, Ju’.”

“I need to see Ethan. I need to tell him something important.”

She was in such emotional distress that Lyanna feared it would make things even worse. But Julia looked at her, almost begging her and she couldn’t refuse it. It seemed like an urgent matter. So in silence, she drove her to Ethan’s place. She could see the light coming from his flat and she swore she had seen a silhouette at the window. She took the elevator and knocked. He almost immediately opened with a huge smile on his face that fell the moment he saw her. He was wearing a nice white shirt and his hair was not as messy as usual.

“Julia?” he said, confused about her presence.

“I needed to talk to you. It’s important.”

“Is it about Louis? Did something happen?”

She shook her head and as she was looking at him she saw he wasn’t alone. A young blond woman that she had never seen before was sitting at the table. She quickly noticed the two plates and the bottle of red wine opened as well as the softly lit atmosphere of the room. He was on a date, he was moving on. Ethan saw her turning pale and quickly guided her to the living-room to make her sit.

“I’m sorry to interrupt your date.” she told him, trying to not show how it hurt her and when she didn’t hear him deny it she thought she was about to break down. And she felt awful to have these thoughts when she was about to tell him she was going to do the same as him. “I needed to tell you something because I feel like I owe it to you and I don’t want you to learn it from anyone else but me…”

“You don’t owe me shit, Julia.”

“I… don’t want to hurt you and I know I will and I know you will have every right to get mad at me.”

“Okay, now you’re scaring me.”

“I kissed Martin.”

He didn’t say anything and that was what scared her the most. He turned his head to the elegantly dressed woman and asked her if she could wait for him in his bedroom and when she was out of sight he slowly turned to Julia.

“What do you want me to say? Congrats? I would love to say that I’m shocked by the news, that it was the last thing I would expect but that would be lying. I’m only surprised it took so much time. It’s been two weeks since that boat dinner, four weeks since I confessed to you and you already moved on. Some might wonder if you ever felt just an ounce of what I feel for you, Julia.”

“You know I did. I still do.”

“Sure… you never said it.” he replied, a little harshly.

“What good would it make anyway! What would it change?”

“Everything!” he screamed.

“Fine! I loved you! I really did! And it hurts so freaking bad to love you, you have no idea! Because now it feels like I’m perpetually stuck in one place, watching the world move on when I can’t! Because you’re everywhere. Everything’s reminding me of you!”

“Apparently not Martin’s sheets.” he laughed, getting a hold of his glass and emptying it in one gulp.

“That’s not fair.”

“That’s not fair? Do you know what is not fair? Seeing the one girl I’ve ever loved telling me she kissed the guy who was supposedly not a threat to me! So don’t say you love me. You don’t. I’m not sure you even know what love is.”

“That’s rich coming from the guy who's getting girls after girls in his bed after our break up!”

She jumped when she saw him throwing the glass on the floor. Pure rage could be seen in his eyes and for the first time since a long time, she was scared of him.

“At least I’m true to myself. I can’t say the same about you. You’re a liar. And you don’t even lie to me, you lie to yourself. You’re a coward. And I still fell for you when all I got in return was a broken heart. But at least I can look at myself in the mirror in the morning and know who I am. You can’t say the same. So go away, be happy with fucking Martin. You both deserve each other. I’m out.”

When he finally closed the door behind her, Ethan fell on the floor right when Sofia came out of the bedroom. It was supposed to be an eventful evening, just a dinner to talk about her contract as his new mental coach. He didn’t plan for Julia to come and he knew she had jumped to conclusions. He should have taken the opportunity to introduce Sofia, to clear the air. But he didn’t owe her anything, especially not now that she had made her choice and that Martin had won.

“So, this is a famous Julia.” she said, sitting on the floor next to him.

“The one and only.”

“She has a new boyfriend from what I heard. It was hard to not listen, I have to admit. You were both pretty loud.”

“Yeah… I would have been okay with it if it hadn't been the guy I tried to kill.”

“Oh gosh… I think we have a lot to unpack there.” Sofia sighed.

“Yep. And you’re in for a ride, doc.”

Author's note: And now, I'm going to hide... What do you think will happen next? Let me know your theories, I love to read them.

Don't hesitate to leave a comment or an ask, as well as reblogging and leaving a like. Besides the fact that I absolutely love to read you, it helps a lot for the story to find its audience. I also have a taglist for this story, so if you want to be added so you never miss a chapter, let me know.

Taglist:

@herondalism @aundercover @musingsbyshreya @karmabyfernando @reengard @mycenterfold @smoooothoperator

[skye-huntress]

More thoughts about The Witch From Mercury, Ep 17

Now that I’ve had some time to collect my thoughts and seen some of the reactions from others online, I wanted to share some extra observations on this latest development. I especially wanted to address some things I see people saying.

First thing I wanted to bring up is that Miorine does know that Prospera is manipulating her. All subtlety went out the airlock during the previous episode. Prospera made it clear what she wanted and what would be at stake if Miorine didn’t go along with her plans. Miorine obviously doesn’t trust her, but unfortunately Prospera holds all of the cards. It was without a doubt a deal with the devil with Suletta’s life and soul as the bargaining chip.

Weren’t there other options? Last episode, Suletta stated that she would abandon her dreams and even her own morals if her mother told her to. If Suletta is incapable of standing up for her own values against her mother’s word, why would Miorine risk testing the strength of her relationship against it? It was also critical for Suletta’s safety that she gave up Aerial who is at the heart of all of Prospera’s plans. Miorine flat out asked her if she would if she asked and Suletta stated with no uncertainty that she wouldn’t. Miorine had to take Aerial away from her by force.

Did Miorine have to be that cruel? Since she will play a key role in the very plot she wants to keep Suletta out of, Miorine had to cut all ties with her. Unfortunately, Suletta’s entire self-worth is based on her being needed by others, and in that regard she has become very codependent on Miorine, perhaps even more so than her mother. Even after Miorine admitted she set her up and sabotaged Aerial, Suletta was still begging for another chance, to prove she could still be useful, that she is worthy of Miorine’s love.

Does this not drive Suletta closer to relying on her mother? This is the one of the most interesting points I think needs closer examination. Now that Suletta has lost Miorine and Aerial, it does stand to reason she would turn to her mother for support. For the time being, Prospera needs Miorine’s continued cooperation more than she needs Suletta. By the sounds of it, she has already served her role as pilot and is now far more useful as a hostage than anything else. It will be interesting to see how Prospera will play this off. She still needs to maintain some control over Suletta and we don’t know if she won’t still need her for something later down the line.

Is this not similar to what Miorine’s father did to her? Isn’t she making decisions on Suletta’s behalf without her consent? This is true, and I wouldn’t discount the possibility that Miorine sees the irony and hypocrisy. Unfortunately, we wouldn’t have gotten into this situation if Suletta was capable of making her own decisions and standing by them. She’d rather be told what to do so she can be useful than be independent. That’s something she has to work out for herself though, Miorine can’t do that for her. All she can do is try to give Suletta as much freedom as possible so she can have a chance to do so. Suletta can only truly find happiness if she is willing to carve out her own way towards it. If Suletta wants to be in a proper, healthy relationship with Miorine, she needs to learn to push back a little and maintain her own agency.

I’m sure there is a lot more to this we can cover so please feel free to add your own thoughts or send me an ask. We’ve apparently got two weeks to obsess over it after all.