#this is me trying to explain what being aroace feels like to me

[queerstudiesnatural]

i just love love. i love to feel love. sometimes i find myself overflowing with love. it's purifying and intoxicating at the same time. i love love.

[themthistles]

i think that while micro labels can seem useful and affirming ultimately they're isolating and kind of an obstacle to your understanding of self. that's because you can never find a word specific enough. there will never be a label or two labels or even ten, twenty of them to perfectly capture and describe all of your thoughts, feelings, experiences, preferences, needs, interests, identities, etc. because you learn more and more about yourself every day and then you change and your wants and needs change with you. having to hop between labels, fearing that you don't 'fit' into a label anymore (both in your own and others eyes), worrying how soon your current label will wear out, questioning if you'll ever fully fit a single one. all that causes a lot of uncertainty and anxiety which could be avoided by just picking a more general thing and molding it according to what it means to YOU. because words will always mean different things to different people, you will never be understood immediately and maybe never completely by anyone but yourself and that's fine

[schattenhonig]

The A in LGBTQIA+ doesn't stand for aspec because they're not repressed!

(please read the disclaimer at the end of this post)

Ummm, excuse me? Would you mind telling me what your definition of repression is, then?

Because I feel repressed when a doctor asks me about my sex life, and if I say I have none, it gets marked down as a symptom without being asked if I suffer from it.

I feel repressed when my gyn tells me I can't get a hysterectomy yet despite losing so much blood on every period that I need to take iron supplements all the time, because I could change my mind about not wanting children (which is a whole other post, I know, but it's most likely linked to sex).

I feel repressed if I can't use dating apps or platforms because my sexuality doesn't even exist there, and the one time I tried, I got called names because I didn't want to meet for because it was clear where this date would go, despite my explicit "what I'm looking for".

I feel repressed when I think about how recently a paragraph was finally abolished in my country that considered sex a vital part of a marriage, basically entitling the spouses to having sex with their partner (both gender neutral, because entitling people to having sex with somebody else by law is wrong. It's basically a rape permission).

I feel repressed when I can't watch any film or show without it being about love and/or sex, no matter if it fits the narrative and furthers the plot.

I feel repressed when I plot my own stories and automatically put a romantic couple in there as main characters, even though I have no idea why this would be important for the plot. Not even my own stories, my own thoughts are mine.

I felt repressed when I was asked accusingly in a relationship if I wasn't missing something before I even knew asexuality as a spectrum was a thing, and having to lie about this being a side effect of my medication instead of genuinely not feeling attracted to someone in this way.

I feel repressed when I can't tell people I'm not sexually attracted to them because they will take this personally no matter how well I explain myself.

I feel repressed when everywhere I look there's advertising relying on naked skin, suggestive posing and objectification. Why are expensive cars still presented by women considered beautiful and tempting? It's not like that's necessary to convince people of spending so much money on a thing that gets you from A to B. Couches with women in smart dresses and high heels. That's not what a normal person looks like on a couch. But the worst is a truck in the town where I live: it's from a small fruit and vegetable stand, so whenever I see it, it comes from the warehouse, delivering groceries. On it is a woman clad in very little, presenting fruit. I'm sorry, but why? Does a misogynistic picture convince you of the necessity to avoid scurvy?

I feel repressed when I tell people and get the answer "you just haven't found the right person yet", because there are two possible assumptions from that point: I'm either not trying hard enough (so it's basically my own fault) or something about me is not right, appalling even (which circles back to I'm not trying hard enough or frames me as a victim of my genetics, upbringing or circumstances to be pitied).

Do not tell me how I feel. Do not try to tell me everything is fine and I shouldn't complain or ask for acknowledgement if everywhere I look, I'm reminded of how odd, how weird and how not normal I am. How much it inconveniences you to even acknowledge my existence, let alone respect any of my traits, views and choices.

And while I can only write from my own asexual point of view, I wrote this with all kinds of flavours of aspec in mind, so I'm explicitly including aromantics, aroace people and every shade of the spectrum in this. Not all my examples may apply to you, but I hope you can find something to relate to.

ETA: please feel free to add your own experiences of repression!

[penguinsfly]

I unfortunately saw something I didn't want to see and that was my last straw. I'm fucking doing this.

Let's establish this first. Alastor is stated in the show to be asexual that is not up to discussion. He is also very heavily implied in the same conversation to be aromatic. 'An Ace in the hole' being used in context of him being with Charlie is also implying his aromanticism.

VIDEO

If that's not enough then here is Viv speaking about his romantic orientation. It's pretty clear despite the fact that afterwards she said it's okay to headcanon whatever (it's not but I will get o that later) that he is written purely as an aro ace character.

On top of that going by Alastor's interaction with Angel from the pilot and the first episode it is clear that he is sex repulsed. Not only that but on the fandom website he is stated to be touch averse with two sources which you can check out on the website.

Hazbin hotel wiki, Alastor page

Now we established that Alastor is canonically Asexual, Aromantic, Sex Repulsed and Touch Averse

As I also am all of the above I'll try to explain everything to the best of my ability as simply as I can.

Aromanticism and Asexuality.

I'm probably targeting the audience that knows those terms but regardless I will explain it anyway.

Aromantic - people that experience little to no romantic attraction towards any gender

Asexual - people that experience little to no sexual attraction towards any gender.

Little to no

Asexuality and aromanticism are spectrums in which people can feel certain attractions towards people but those attractions are less occurring or are defined by personal connection.

Diagram from AVEN website

However some people are at the end of the spectrum, they never felt attraction and that's valid. Alastor was stated to be aroace he wasn't written as demi or as gray he was written as aroace as in the end of the spectrum. His repulsion and not giving shit about romance or sex speaks for itself.

Representation

I do understand that everyone wants to be represented but it's so important to understand that aroace people are one of the most underrepresented queer groups in the media.

And I'm not here to scream about how I want my fav character to be just like me I don't care for it I'm way too confident in my orientation to rely on that however I'm tired of explaining to people what asexuality and aromanticism is just to receive 'are you sure' or 'you'll change your mind' or 'its not real' or the community favourite 'you'll find the right person' no I won't I'm not looking thank you very much (I just smile and nod to be polite and I'm sick of it).

'Harmless' buts like: 'He might be on the spectrum', 'AroAce people can still feel attraction' hurt the final outcome for all the people on the spectrum not only strictly aroaces because it allows people to write one shots with 'Demi Alastor' that falls in love in 2000 words because he is 'demi' (spoiler alert: they don't understand what that label means). It's just a cover, an opening, sneaky way to disregard his orientation, feel good about themselves and move on. Newsflash there is no moving on for aroace people it's our life.

Shipping

Shipping is just harmless fun right? Usually yes but not in this case. In the same way its not okay to ship gay characters with genders they are not attracted to.

It's erasure and since there is much less people identifying on aro/ace spectrums then there is gay or bi people our voices are being silenced. Not to mention that gay people received support from entire LGBTQIA+ community over the years in contrast to aro/ace specs who to this day are told that we are 'not queer enough' or 'not oppressed enough' often by other queer people.

And finally... FINALLY we get cannon Aro/Ace character that is clearly not interested in romance and sex. Character that beats stereotypes of boring and timid aro/ace people and what's the first people do? They ship him. Alastor's storyline provides so many points to be explored like 'what is his backstory', ' what's about his deal', ' how does he fit in in the found family trope' , 'does he care about hotel guests' yet people choose to write about the only thing that he is not interested in. As a heavily repulsed person that used to be horrified about the fact that I'll have to fall in love with somebody at some point before I found out what aro/ace is I find it repulsive and trust me he would too.

But Viv said it's okay!

Its the same point once again. What if Viv said that it's okay to ship gay Angel with woman. She doesn't have authority to say shit like that.

Queerplatonic relationships

I can't tell you not to do it I don't think he would be necessary interested in it but for fuck sake do your research and try to understand what queerplatonic means before you use it as a cover to shamelessly ship him. Respect the fact that he is sex repulsed and touch averse and you're fine.

Why can't you just avoid it?

First of all I shouldn't have to. Alastor's orientation should be respected in the fandom like any other orientation is. Second of all I've tried. I tried to only look up AroAce Alastor tag I've blocked over 80 people on tumblr alone (I just counted) to avoid to see anything that could trigger me and I'm not talking about slightly shippy posts or fanarts I'm talking about full blown disregard towards his orientation. Guess what it didn't work!

Archive of our own where do I start. I've used this website for over a decade and I could probably count days I didn't go there on my fingers. I'm fluent in AO3 I know which tags I should block. I know how to skim thorough the summary and tags to see if I'm interested. I've seen shit I'm a shipper I've been on ao3 for ten years but never had to mentally prepare myself to face queerphobia as I click on the tab.

Just use aro/ace Alastor tag.

I do and let me tell you people can't tag for shit or they just pretend to be clueless at this point. Besides see this?

there is more ff with Alastor/reader (disgusting) than there is Alastor with his canon orientation and to play the devils advocate for arophobic people there is more Angel/Alastor then his stated in the show sexuality. I understand that fandom goes back before the show was aired but Viv confirmed his orientation back then too.

Summary

I could go on and on bout different issues and maybe I will in the future but I'm not wasting anymore of this weekend on it. I'm ready to answer any questions as long as they are respectful.

I'm aware that he is a fictional character, it doesn't affect him in any way whatsoever but it does affect aromantic and asexual people keep it in mind.

If there are any mistakes grammar related I'm not sorry I'm fluent in English (not my first language) but I took 3h nap in between and I'm sleep deprived.

Have a nice day.

[fanby-fckry]

You know what, I’m just gonna say it. I think that Alastor being aroace is part of the reason he’s so shippable to me.

Before you come at me, check the flag in my pfp; I’m aroace-spec.

Maybe it’s me projecting, maybe it’s because I love exploring relationships through an aroace lens, but goddamn. I ship him more than any other character and every time I do, his aroaceness is a major component in the ship.

Examples below the cut because it’s gonna get long:

📻🍎 || RadioApple:

There are so many versions of this dynamic and I am here for all of them.

We have the pre-canon kinky QPR that I show in UH3. I could talk about that all day, but to summarize:

Aroace x genuinely respectful allo is a dynamic that heals my soul.

Lucifer is less tied down by human constructs like amatonormativity, having never been human himself.

The Devil values consent.

Kinky cannibalism, kinky cannibalism, kinky cannibalism, kinky ca- *I am removed from the stage with a comically large hook*

Then we have the Evil and fucked up QPR dynamic:

And of course, trying to get along for Charlie’s sake and eventually bonding over their shared love of dad jokes and musical theatre, both being violinists (yup, Alastor plays violin too, check the wiki) with niche hobbies/interests (ducks, furby organ) and accidentally winding up in a loving, healthy QPR.

📻🕸️ || RadioDust:

There’s something about an aroace and a sex worker who very rarely falls in love.

Angel would know that Alastor isn’t with him for sex, would know that he values Angel beyond his body.

With greyro Alastor, Angel and Alastor would both be inexperienced with romance, but in wildly different ways. Angel has never had a healthy romantic relationship and therefor tries not to fall in love. Greyro Alastor has probably experienced romantic attraction like less than three times in his 100+ years of existence.

And if Alastor never gains romantic attraction for Angel, that’s a whole other level to the dynamic.

It’s got some great angst potential with Angel wondering if he’s not good enough to love romantically or Alastor feeling guilty or confused as to Why It Hasn’t Happened Yet when he cares for Angel so deeply, and eventually it gets resolved with the two of them accepting that their attractions don’t have to match up for them to love/appreciate/care for each other and they smash the amatonormative relationship hierarchy as queer platonic partners.

Or, Angel’s just totally cool with it from the start because he’s spent decades in the kink scene and has potentially been exposed to more relationship anarchy than Alastor.

Kink and queerness have a great deal of historical and cultural overlap, and that includes aroace queerness. Because Angel’s had way more canon exposure to both, it’s possible he knows more about Alastor’s orientation than Alastor does, and I love the idea of Angel introducing him to terms or just being super chill about not labeling things.

📻♥️ || RadioHusk:

Drawing like 90% from pilot dynamic and headcanon on this. They’re just two old men. They get drunk and cuddle. Alastor is one of the few people who knows Husk can purr and takes advantage of this fact. Alastor considers Husk a friend in a fucked up, possessive way. Husk considers Alastor a pain in the ass, but does care about him on some level.

It’s Fucked Up and Evil QPR: Remix Edition.

And the versions where the author puts them through fanfic couple’s therapy and actually gets them into a healthy point in their relationship? One where Alastor no longer owns Husk’s Soul? *chef’s kiss*

📻🌹 || RadioRose:

For me, personally, this is an exclusively nonsexual, non-romantic ship. They’re besties; they’re QPPs. They’re married for the tax benefits and so that they cannot be forced to testify against each other in court.

Rosie knew Alastor was aroace before he did and rather than sit down and explain it to him, she decided to make ace puns.

📻🖤 || RadioSiren: [edit, context here] RadioFemme

Ok, so this is entirely based on non-canon-compliant Lilith. Or, I guess, non-series-compliant Lilith. More of the old WOG stuff from the pilot era, with a healthy dose of headcanon for flavor.

I love the idea of Lilith and Lucifer having an open marriage; I love the UH3 style polycule dynamic.

Lilith being the original seductress and Alastor being aesthetically but not sexually or romantically attracted to her is very near and dear to my heart.

I’m an aroace with a voice kink who is aesthetically attracted to Lilith and I think Alastor is an aroace with a voice kink who would be aesthetically attracted to Lilith, ok?

📻📺 || RadioStatic:

I’m gonna be real with you, 90% of my interest in RadioStatic is in the one-sided version where Vox is a pathetic little incel simp and Alastor is either oblivious, mildly annoyed, or finds the whole thing hilarious.

Whenever there’s any reciprocation on Alastor’s part, I always imagine it being in a very aroace, very Alastor-esque way. He needs to be get something out of it completely unrelated to sex/romance. And he needs to be manipulative and sadistic in the process.

Whether that something is kink-related, a business transaction, or simply the quality entertainment provided by Vox being a cringefail TV-headed little bitch, I love to see it.

[twigs-sprigs]

i hate the way this fandom treats the aroace lloyd hc

let me explain!

i personally hc lloyd as demiace so im not too far off! and its obviously not like i hate the aroace hc, ive actually had it for a while before i came to mine

anyway, it feels to me that some people have no idea what being aroace is like.

some people think "oh, he's aroace, so obviously he can't be in any relationship!" which is just stupid? like, no, that's not how that works. either that or whenever someone *does* mention aroace lloyd being in a relationship, its qpr! (which isnt bad, but again, it feels quite restricted in this context)

if aroace people feel like they want to be in any sort of relationship, romantic or not, they can. its not like now that ur aroace, ur just gonna be like "oh!! i cant feel love any longer!!" no. and it sucks because ive genuienly seen lloyd interps where thats the case..

obviously everybody builds their characters as they want, im not trying to dictate anything, if your lloyd is in a qpr, cool! if your lloyd doesnt feel like dating (which i know is the majority), also cool! if you understand the things ive mentioned in this post and agree, more to ya!

this post is about the people who for some reason look at lloydships are like like "gasp!! you cant do that!! lloyd is aroace!", completely denying that part of being aroace, that you can indeed if you want, date.

not to mention the fact that some people hc lloyd as aroace JUST because of the tomorrows tea situation. which. guys... cmon... what kind of reason is that?

anyway..! have these silies for listening to my ramble

[chaoticace2005]

Thinking about one sided Vox/Alastor has also made me think about Huskerdust, and it’s kind of interesting the way they mirror each other.

Both Vox and Angel (both people who have some kind of relationship with Valentino) push the boundaries of the guy they’re interested in. Both guys turn them down. Both times they react poorly to being turned down. The difference is how the stories begin and ended.

Husk was forced after Angel, jumped in to protect him and made the first step. He started a dialogue that Angel reciprocated in, not because Angel thought Husk would finally return his feelings, but because he was happy to finally have someone who understands him. Their relationship is then created where they care about each other. Whether or not romantic feelings are reciprocated isn’t the point, they formed genuine connection.

Then we have Alastor and Vox, where they were friends BEFORE the confession happened. Alastor must have been willing to be vulnerable to some degree to form attachments with the man, and for a while it was reciprocated, until Vox confessed and pushed. This caused Alastor to leave and then we see the fall out later with Alastor and Vox’s battles.

Huskerdust and radiostatic have the same pieces of the story, just told in very different orders:

Huskerdust: Push boundaries- needle each other- fight- one reaches out- they bond- friendship

Radiostatic: One reaches out- they bond- friendship- push boundaries- fight- needle each other

The difference between the two is not just the order but also the fact with Huskerdust they recognize they needed to stop. Husk was in no way obligated to take the first step because Angel kept pushing him, but he did, because he recognized something in him. Then with Angel’s treatment of Husk later Angel recognized he needed to stop. What Angel was doing was a persona and self-defense mechanism, yes, but that explains why he did it, not excusing it. And to change he must be able to recognize that.

With Vox though, he doesn’t recognize it. We don’t know exactly where Vox’s feelings from Alastor stem, they may not be a persona like Angel’s but they’re certainly unhealthy, and he refuses to recognize it. Focusing only on his own comfort and hurt, which Angel similarly did until he was pulled out of the loop.

I want to again reiterate the reciprocity of these feelings isn’t my point of discussion. Radiostatic isn’t “more toxic” than Huskerdust because Alastor is aroace and doesn’t reciprocate Vox’s feelings, while Husk potentially grows to have feelings for Angel. Alastor isn’t in the wrong solely because he denied Vox. That’s not the point. The point is their similar reactions to rejection and how their relationships changed from it.

In Huskerdust we have the creation of trust and forming of a bond.

In radiostatic we have the loss of trust and fracture of one.

(Literally just exponential growth vs decay)

(Also im just comparing the relationships. I am in no way saying Angel and Vox are the same person or Husk and Alastor are. Everyone has their own separate fucked up shit going on and different degrees of fucked uppedness. Husk and Angel don’t seem near as sadistic as Vox and Alastor are, I’m not equating them to “villains” in that sense. The whole point of this is the fact that their relationships have such different end results BECAUSE Husk and Angel are able to recognize their faults to a degree and WANT to change. With the other two we don’t really have that.

Angel could have continued down the whole “incel” route and told Husk to fuck off every time he tried reaching out. Too snubbed by the fact that he rejected him. Husk could have decided to leave Angel out to try and not help him at the bar. Hell, he could have watched the whole thing happen and fucking enjoyed it. But he didn’t.)

[artsymeeshee]

Hello,

I was wondering if maybe you could help me by explaining something?

So i hear about aromantic and asexual and aroace. I thought aromantic means like no romantic feelings and asexual is no interest in s**. But is aroace just a short ning of the word or does that mean something else?

Also how did you know? Im in my begin twenties and i dont feel any interests for either, but i dont know if i just havent met the right person or if those feelings are just not there at all.

I do think in tv shows its cute (romance like toh or some ships from the gf fandom) but in the real world.. i couldnt really be bother with it.

Aroace is a combination of Aromantic and Asexual. It's what's used when people identify as being Aromantic and Asexual. Aro's and Ace's are usually clumped together because they share having none or a lack of attraction but there are people who solely identify as being Aromantic or only identify as Asexual.

It's been an ongoing thing for me personally. I knew I was Asexual before knowing I was Demiromantic (Though I identified as Demisexual before realizing the demi part was for the romance side.) It was around 2017 when I came across the terms Asexual and Aromantic and things slowly started to click in and make sense. Meeting the right person idea was always on my mind back then and it kind of ate me up because there was a pressure behind it to try and find someone but I've slowly began to appreciate being in my own company.

And a lot of Aroaces do like shipping in fandoms. For some, it's just the practice in real life that just doesn't interest them at all. It's perfectly fine to identify as being Aroace and then something else down the road. I would look up microlabels for Asexuality and Aromanticism because there might be something that you feel strongly about that fits you. And like I said, don't feel bad if one label doesn't fit after a certain amount of time. You'll always find something that works.

[thatnerdyqueer]

People get so confused when I try to explain the type/s of attraction I feel. But let me put it like this: I "fall in love" with someone's character. I don't want their body - I want their presence. I don't lust after them - I admire them. I don't want a romantic relationship - I find them fascinating. Interesting. Fun. They challenge and compliment me. They're loyal. They're funny. They're not two-dimensional, they're a well rounded character. I fall in love with someone as a character, as an arc, as a person. As a friend. People seem to read this one of two ways - it's romantic, or it's just platonic and I haven't found the right person yet. *sigh* the definition of platonic is 'deeply affectionate but not romantic in nature'. So yeah, it's platonic. It's deep. It's affectionate. It's not romantic. It's just as good though, so can we stop saying 'just'?

Like, you know when people have gay panics? I want that, and frequently experience it, but in a platonic way. As in, wow what you did was really impressive/intersting I want to get to know you and spend time with you kind of way. Not in a wow I want to kiss you way. Someday I want to meet someone in a bookshop and 'flirt' with them or whatever allos seem to think it is, and get their phone number. And then, instead of asking them to see a movie as a date, I'll ask them to come and eat pop corn with my friends and watch a movie because I think they'll find it interesting.

Make no mistake - I'm aroace, but I still want my meet cute. I want a platonic meet cute where I find someone, who's character is so full and interesting and bursting with life that I get their number and send them memes and geek out with them, and get to know them and admire them until we feel comfortable around each other. I just want to live with someone. To read together, watch tv shows together, listen to music together, go to the theatre together, without them being considered 'dates'. Because I don't want them because I want their body. I want them in my life because I like their character.

And if you think about it, I'm very lucky in this way. Because, while not everyone has a super-model body, the vast majority of individuals are so bursting with life that I am very, very, likely to find people, many people, whose character I love. To be honest, I've already found plenty. But, ever the "optimist", I hope I find more :)

[obsidianstrawberrymilk]

A short list of things I would have changed in HoO

It takes place ten ish years after the end of PJO. Percy and Annabeth aren’t a part of the seven but instead appear as cool older mentors to help out the Lost Hero trio. They both have careers and live in New York and go to Sally’s house for dinner every weekend.

Caleo isn’t a thing. In fact, let’s not even mention Calypso. At most we mention she was freed after the last war as idk proof demigods have some power or something.

More than 1 Asian character. Give this one ADHD and dyslexia bc shocker Asian kids can be disabled as well.

For that matter a properly disabled character. I have a deaf OC I would use if I rewrote the series.

Leo is aroace. His arc is about learning that his self worth doesn’t have to be tied to the people around him and his friends love and care about him and he doesn’t need romance to be complete. His flirting is overcompensation bc he doesn’t feel romantic or sexual attraction and is afraid he’ll be alone forever.

Drew and Piper become friends. Drew’s mean girl bullshit is outdated and boring and it would have been a lot cooler to see her icy exterior thaw and her help Piper with her charmspeck (explaining how Piper learned how to use it to begin with) and take on an older sister role

Neither Leo nor Piper become head councilors to their cabins because that’s dumb

Keep the chapter title style from PJO. It was so fun and one of the highlights of the series for me. The relatable nature of PJO in general was kinda lost in HoO and it’s a shame bc there was such a variety of characters for people to identify with there.

Give Reyna a girlfriend or at least a homoerotic friendship that can become an actual relationship in the next series or something

Frank is 14 and he and Hazel aren’t dating, they just have mutual baby crushes on one another.

For that matter what the fuck was ‘Frank is magically not fat due to Mars’s blessing’ bullshit? Frank is a fat character who stays fat but learns to be confident in himself and his body type.

Stop The Adultification of Hazel 2k23. Hazel is 13, she’s the youngest member of the seven and despite her trauma I think that should be obvious. I think emphasizing her relationship with Nico could be fun here - he’s in his 20s so him taking a more ‘that older sibling who toes the line between parent and sibling’ role here could be fun.

Also, I don’t want Hazel to have Hecate’s blessing or whatever. Between her being a magical horsegirl and the daughter of Pluto there’s already a lot of room to expand on her powers that was never used - I think doing more with her cursed jewels and metals powers and her learning the other aspects of her powers, like Shadow Travel, would be fun.

Instead I think having a daughter of Hecate as a part of the Seven would be cool, because we could still have a witchy character with mist manipulation and magic powers.

Give Jason an actual personality, please. Bro’s been a child solider practically since age 2 and has spent his whole life with the weight of other teenagers’ lives on his shoulders as praetor - give him perfectionism issues and anxiety. We’re told that he’s spent his whole life helping others compromise instead of being his own person - show that. Let his arc end with him deciding to try and live a mortal life and find out who he is beyond being a war general.

Show us that Octavian’s a piece of shit, don’t just tell us.

Leo and Piper are the ones who fall into Tartarus. Nothing romantic ever happens but we get heavy emphasis on their friendship and we get to see their grief over Leo’s mom and Piper’s grandfather respectively

Piper’s grandfather has died a few months ago and she cut her hair herself when her dad didn’t want to let her due to that (correct me if I’m wrong but it’s a tradition in Cherokee culture to cut your hair when a loved one dies, correct?), which is why it’s all uneven. A lot of her insecurities stem from going from growing up in rural Oklaholma (not in a reservation bc there aren’t any there) without much money to suddenly being catapulted into a millionaire Hollywood lifestyle and having everyone criticize everything about her and be really racist, all while her Dad drew farther away from both her and her grandfather. Her arc would be reconnecting with both her culture and Dad and learning to find who she is and her self worth again.

They defeat Gaea in a way that isn’t so anticlimactic and fucking stupid

[mary-laib]

OKAY WRITING ABOUT JWCT SHIPS TIME:

Sammy x Yasmina

10/10

I love their relationship and how they have come so far throughout cc and ct. Also less to do with the ship but I especially loved how Yasmina was shown in ct to have worked towards facing her fears and has gotten so much further than Sammy, who has been ignoring her problems. There's like nothing to hate about this ship. Everyone agrees they're perfect.

Kenji x Brooklyn

3/10

I've been waiting for them to break up since they got together. She was great for him in the beginning of their relationship, helping him become his own person and becoming less egotistical, but she has refused to change with him, which has made their relationship stagnant. I thing their relationship was good for Kenji and I'm glad they got together if only so that she could help him figure out how to be his own man, but past that, their relationship was pointless and I hope it never gets rejuvenated.

Ben x Darius

8/10

I love them as bros and honestly, despite their obvious closeness and the fact that I would like to see more of their interactions, I see them as more platonic, especially with what Darius said about his crush on Brooklyn. Not because of him liking Brooklyn or girls in general and you'll see why in a minute. But I also wouldn't be mad to see them get together. They're both nerds and I love them.

Darius x Brooklyn

2/10

Honestly, I feel like the same things that caused a rift in Brooklyn's relationship with Kenji would also tear apart her relationship with Darius. And it's stated in the show that it's unrequited. They're good friends, but while he'd probably rate her as his top friend and vice versa, I feel like we can collectively agree that there are other friendships he has that are less toxic. Also the love triangle thing feels so weird when the girl cares less about both the guys combined than either one feels about her.

Darius x Nobody

9/10 The dots have been connected

Now hear me out: I don't feel like his crush has ruined things between him and Ben or Kenji, but some things about what he said regarding his crush and his reactions have made me feel like he is very aroace coded. Which has put a lot of things in perspective for me. Since the beginning of cc, he's been a "power of friendship" guy and rewatching his interactions with everyone, they seem a lot stronger and meaningful as just platonic, rather than romantic. And while everyone around him has been dealing with romance, he's just kind of indifferent to it all until Brooklyn. And his reaction to his crush on Brooklyn just screams repressed aroace with him saying that he never thought he could feel like that (has he never had a crush on anybody before) and how he has completely panicked regarding their relationship. Idk to me, it's giving aroace with a "fake" crush or demi aroace person who has taken way too long to fall for a girl that anybody else would have fallen for after the original bout of mortal danger. He had to be friends with her for YEARS before he could catch a semblance of a crush on her. And it also sounds to me like she was pretty absent in his life before popping in to stay with him for a week, which could also explain why he might he having a "fake" crush (if that is what it is). ALSO: when I say "fake" crush, I'm not trying to downplay his feelings, I'm just referring to something a lot of aroace people experience where you get really close to someone and mistake those feelings for love. And when it happens, these feelings are very intense(speaking from experience). Like how if he's suddenly frequently interacting with Brooklyn again and it's just them, I feel like that kind of situation could lead to an aroace crush. It's all just giving aroace person experiencing their first crush in the most traumatic way possible.

Brooklyn x Nobody

10/10 We love to see a gal feeling herself

I feel like at this point in the story, she has nothing to gain or give by being in a relationship with anybody in the show. Her and Kenji had a decent run while they had it, but it's time to let go at this point. If she does end up with someone, it has to be someone outside the main cast and personally, I'd like to see her with a gal pal. She has bi energy, especially with the new haircut.

Kenji x Darius

7/10

Honestly, I definitely shipped them mid-cc, but at the beginning of ct, I decided I did not want to see them get together. But by the end, I kind of changed my mind. I still think their relationship would be best platonic, but I also wouldn't be mad if they got together. It'd probably be a bit stranger than if Darius was with Ben, but they've also got a strong connection.

Ben x Kenji

0/10

I feel like they've hardly gotten any relationship building in either cc or ct and it needs to happen pronto. There has to be something they can bond over

Sammy x Yasmina and Ben

10/10

I'd like to see the lesbians in a qpr with their hypeman. Ben is just so cute with them and he loves them so much (platonically) and vice versa. It doesn't need to be anything official, but just more of Ben being their third wheel/adopted son would make the show more perfect than it already is.

Ben x His European GF

2/10

I think she's fake, either that he's lying about her so he doesn't lose street cred or that she is lying to him and is a catfish. Maybe we'll see a plot twist relating to the gf, but I'm not holding out hope. She could be redeemed if she was a real girl who was a total kickass and saved the whole group (maybe they meet her at the end of their stowaway boat mission) but otherwise I don't really care about her. Also don't lose hope, people who hc him as gay or aro, there's always the chance that he's bi, lying, or having a "fake" crush like Darius. I know I, as an aroace person have had more online than irl relationships and I'm p sure that's a sign of not being allo, especially when the person you're dating is far away and you have no plans of ever seeing them irl.

Anyways thanks for coming to my Ted Talk.

[furst1ded]

Thoughts on Shipping Alastor from an AroAce person

(this entire thing is copy and pasted excerpts from a Discord rant so if the grammar is funky, that's why, I just felt like giving my 2 cents on the topic)

Aroace people can still participate in romantic and sexual interactions. All being aro/ace/aroace means is you don't feel romantic/sexual attraction upon seeing other people. You can feel it later on or in waves or could never feel that attraction but still can participate and love others in a fulfilling way. Some aroace people are fine performing intimacy onto others but dislike reciprocation, others are the opposite where they're fine receiving but not giving. It's a spectrum.

The nuances of asexuality and aromanticism aside, you can be in a relationship without being in a relationship. Platonic relationships beyond friendship are a thing (QPRs for example). But like, I get it. Not everyone who ships Alastor keeps it confined to a QPR. And his character seems pretty sex-repulsed and romance-averse. But here's the other thing. He's fictional. As long as his character remains aroace in canon, fans taking the silly radio man and making him kiss the devil isn't taking away from aroace representation.

This next bit is coming from me as an AroAce person myself. I ship Alastor. I write/read him kissing people and fucking and acting romantic. And guess what? It's related to expressing my sexuality. Alastor is one of my favorite characters in anything ever and I love that there's a character that represents a facet of myself in a popular media. I relate to him so goddamn much and that's why I ship him. He's a fictional character I like that I project onto, so I use him as a way to navigate and explore romantic/sexual relationships that I'm never going to participate in myself. He's not real so I just puppet him around to live through vicariously in the scenarios I don't want to be a part of myself but find super interesting. It's not anything new, I do the same with my own characters in the stories I write them in, it's part of storytelling, I just use him for a specific type of story for a specfic part of myself.

It's not like we're hurting anybody by shipping him. We're not drastically effecting canon and making him an alloromantic. I've seen plenty of fics that ship him that either make it a QPR or they thoroughly explore the nuances of his asexuality and what subtype of sexuality he is and how he navigates it and I love those fics because they speak to me on a spiritual level. Grayromantic Alastor, demisexual alastor, sex-repulsed but romance-favorable Alastor, sex-repulsed and romance-averse Alastor in a one-sided ship fic, etc they're all so important to me because it helps me live out my own sexuality and romantic orientation and explore myself.

I get it. Not everyone is respectful. Not everyone feels the way I do and use characters in this way. It can suck seeing people just ignore his sexuality when asexuals and aromantics don't get much in terms of screen-time. But you can't control everybody and what work they put out. And trying to censor stuff like that does more harm than good. I just explained why fics involving Alastor are so important to me. They normalize QPRs and aroaces being in relationships. That's probably what pisses me off the fucking most. If we're not allowed to write about aroaces being in relationships or romantic/sexual situations, you put aroaces into a box. A box where every aroace is perceived as sexless and loveless, which just isn't true. A box where aroaces are prudes or infants who can't handle hearing the word "sex". It's just so frustrating. You can be mad at fics that expressly rewrite or stomp on his sexuality, sure. You can't stop them, but you can disapprove of them. But let the rest of us have our fun making the literal devil and TV head man have the hots for a man whose teeth are yellower than the sun, Jesus Christ.

TL;DR: asexuality is a spectrum, I'm aroace and use shipping as a way to explore and express myself and I know I'm not the only one, trying to suppress works where an Aroace character is seen participating in romance or sex can actually be harmful in that it promotes only one idea of what being aroace is, and at the end of the day the character I'm talking about doesn't even exist.

[chubs-deuce]

Something that I hate that ppl do when it comes to hating on Chalastor is saying “Alastor is aroace and Charlie is in a relationship with Vaggie! You’re being disrespectful to both of them!” Even when you explain that’s it’s merely a harmless AU, they still get soooo upset.

Which first off, Alastor is actually ace, not aroace, Amir literally said that himself, and second, just cuz Charlie is with Vaggie doesn’t mean other people are going to ship them, cuz Charlie is bisexual! And thirdly, being ace or aro or both is a spectrum. It’s a wide range of things, not everyone is going to be repulsed. Yeah canon show Alastor maybe repulsed by sex and romance but that’s what AUs are for! They are there for others to expand and change things as they see fit.

Like I think Chaggie is a cute canon ship, but I find Charlie and Alastor and even RadioRose far more appealing and adorable, and especially when it comes to the fanart. Like the fanart! Every piece of Chalastor and RadioRose fanart I have seen is just *chef kiss* ✨perfection✨ seriously your art of Chalastor has got to be my favorite fanart I’ve seen of them, everything is just so beautiful 😭🥹 also I’m a huge sucker for Dad!Alastor

Before I dig into this response any further I'd like to thank you for the high praise of my art, but I'd also like to point out that I don't exactly appreciate the negative tone you're bringing into my inbox here and would like to kindly remind you that my asks are not a confession booth for fandom salt... ^^"

I understand that it can be really frustrating to deal with that kind of stuff, but I feel like a lot of this belongs more in dms than in an ask box that gets responded to publicly...

Fuck knows I have my own not-so-nice opinions about some things certain people in fandoms do, especially considering the nigh constant harrassment some ships are under by other sub-groups of the fanbase, but I vent that shit privately with friends where it won't kick any beehives into a tizzy along the way... It also imo just reflects on the rest of the ship community a bit better to not make big public stinks over some faceless douchebags on the internet with too much time to waste ^^".

(Yes this is an open invitation to just dm me with fandom salt like this if you need to unload some, I'll happily indulge you there! But I really would prefer keeping fandom salt out of my asks and in turn out of my public posts lmao)

Ultimately I'm a strong believer of ship and let ship and I am also of the opinion that if you need to put down another ship to enjoy your own you're not doing the shipping thing right.

Indulging in romantic and/or sexual fantasies about fictional characters is meant to be fun! We're all just sitting in our own little corner making our dolls kiss after all.

Unfortunately, I think a lot of people in this modern era of fandom spaces keep forgetting that. For many, shipping is a competition for bragging rights (i.e. canonicity), a form of activism or for yet again others it can be an excuse to mask bully urges and habits as exerting moral superiority (hence the constant, hypocrisy-filled barbs at people not "respecting" their canon sexualities)

Depending on which one you're dealing with, you may get genuine confusion at your shipping preferences since they approach shipping with a completely different mindset (i.e. shipping for canoncity and/or aesthetics over the narrative potential and/or writing quality) or people intentionally trying to bait you into a defensive response.

Sometimes you can argue someone out of their frustration about your lack of "respect" for canon by explaining that what you do doesn't affect canon in the slightest, nor do you even want or need it to - maybe even giving your reasons for shipping something! But that only works on people that are already receptive to your arguments, so you have to know who and what you're up against and if they're even worth wasting that sort of time and energy on.

I can assure you that 90% of the time the easiest option is to just block antis without giving them the grace of a response. It's usually the quickest way to get out of those types of situations lol (ignore them if they start claiming that they "won" and consider you weak or cowardly for blocking them - they just want to guilt you into unblocking so they have more free reign to keep harrassing you)

[going-to-ikea-for-the-fries]

[Just corrupted anon again]

Johnny has a thing for Stoic!Reader because of the mystery behind them, always keeping a poker face even in dire situation and the strong, powerful aura that reader has but it's also reassuring. A mix between Price and Ghost the stern yet comforting from Gaz.

Johnny knocking on stoic!reader's door because Price had asked him to get the paperworks that were needed but ends up just stammering towards reader because the way reader speaks is so emotionless and stern, it sends him into a horny frenzy-

Finally telling stoic!reader what Price wanted, reader dismisses him but he doesn't leave and just stands there like a sweet, lost puppy and who is totally not horny or anything because reader is only in a black tank top and their cargo pants while reader does paperwork.

Stoic!Reader casually staring at Johnny because he hasn't left and asks if there is anything else.

Johnny stutters as he tries to explain that Price, Ghost and Gaz were getting ready for a mission, clenching onto the documents, trying to ask a certain question because poor pup was going to be alone for quite awhile but ends up silencing himself and leaving. 'Cause why would reader do that for him if reader was aroace? (again, sue me).

Not even 2 weeks in when the other three were gone. Johnny pathetically asks Stoic!Reader if they could fuck him.

Stoic!reader who wanted to say 'no' till they saw the twitching outline of Johnny's bulge and felt a twinge of pity for Johnny boy and sighs.

Stoic!reader who says 'yes' but only on one condition which makes Johnny happy, though the next day Johnny was now on his hands and knees with stoic!reader prepping his rim to take in the strap-on they bought online together (Johnny totally didn't get the overnight shipping).

Johnny is already a squirming mess as he came twice already from being prepped by reader. Reader obviously not done with Johnny, had already put the big, girthy, bumpy strap-on, on already and grabs him roughly by his mohawk. Rubbing the plastic-rubber against his weeping cock gathering the cum and proceeds to rub coated strap-on onto his ass, slicking it up before pushing it to the hilt.

Pathetic whining moans leaves Johnny's lips as he's drilled onto Stoic!Reader's bed like reader hates him, shocking Johnny at the full force that comes from reader's frame, he never would've guessed reader would have it in them to be this way. Letting him orgasm in this position twice before doing it once missionary.

Johnny already an overstimulated little pup on stoic!reader's bed, crying from too much pleasure and was ready to give out, to fucked out to even help reader orgasm. But don't worry, reader already had a plan for that.

Stoic!Reader pushing Johnny's legs up, stroking the tip of his cock before guiding it into reader's hole making poor Johnny weep from overstimulation, pain and pleasure. Knees behind Johnny's ass while holding his legs up as reader fucks down onto him, closing in on their own orgasm and Johnny building up his, what? 5th? 7th orgasm? He doesn't know.

Neither of the two hearing the sound of multiple boots hitting the floor nearing reader's barracks. The door opening as both Johnny and Reader orgasms at the same time.

Johnny looks weakly at the other three with a smile, who stared at Stoic!Reader in shock, Reader's expression remains stoice but as their eyes trailing down the three men's body already seeing their growing bulge, stoic!reader gives a small smirk and removes themselves from Johnny (who totally didn't pass out).

Well shit. Price, Ghost and Gaz later on couldn't remember that reader smirked at them, nor did the four remember that reader pecked their foreheads as they all lay together, asleep, after being fucked and looked after by reader.

Stoic!reader who finishes changing, closes the door quietly letting their four boys sleep. Till next time.

I-

NOW HOLD ON JUST A MINUTE-

THAT MADE ME FEEL THINGS

ANON, I DON'T KNOW WHO YOU ARE BUT YOU JUST WROTE SOMETHING SO GLORIOUS AND I-

YOU'RE NOT RECENTLY CORRUPTED, YOU'VE **BEEN** CORRUPTED AND I, FOR ONE, AM ABSOLUTELY EATING IT UP

[prettyboykatsuki]

fang i used to never understand queerplatonic relationships (never judged!! just couldnt quite grasp the concept) until i read over your feelings/situation and i think i finally get it now and i realize i was in some sort of queerplatonic (borderline) situationship back in high school 😭😭 i never knew how to explain the relationship me and this dude had but i think that best describes it 🧍🏻🧍🏻🧍🏻crazy

the reason i always defend queer platonic relationships is because they are Not the same as friendship and i dont think its easy to understand why that is unless you have firsthand experience with the feeling.

(and this ask is not to u anon!!! but to other people in general. im so so glad that the term queerplatonic is helping u define ur emotions towards someone!!! )

like. i get it. i get why people equate these things. i get why people see the notion of deep platonic intimacy and associate with the idea with friendship. i get why the instinctual reaction to an unfamiliar relationship dynamic is seeing it as an annoying gen z semantics thing and choosing to invalidate it

but qprs are so very different from friendship and romance - both semantically and logistically no matter what anyone says. they are probably closer to something in the middle.

i think the reason people want these things to be the same so badly is because society at large is obsessed with defining relationships through hierarchy. and in that hierarchy - romance is always at the top of the totem pole so anything outside of that must be either Serious Platonic Friendship or Familial Love. our social view of love is very binary and rigid and a lot of this is proved in fandom culture itself.

on top of that it is also a matter of access. often, when people hear the term queer platonic they assume immediately that it's another - more inaccessible kind of friendship and that it's intentionally trying to put hierarchy on what is actually just best friendship which is not true. the label was never intended for that. it was coined by aroaces looking for life partnership and commitment most similar to romantic relationships but not.

in the first place, invalidating the harmless labeling of a relationship bc you find it annoying is asshole behavior lmao. but refusing to acknowledge that there are people who experience something that you dont and then overall insisting whatever their lived experience may be is false is insane asshole behavior shskjdfjs.

qprs are their own separate Thing. but they are relationships informed by commitment that is simply not normal in our society for friendship no matter how much people insist on it. the only time that kind of friendships is acceptable is usually between cis women which by definition makes that version of intimate platonic friendship inaccessible to everyone else.

and they are like every other relationship in our society in which the nitty gritty details can only be defined by the people within them. they are platonic committed relationships defined as being Queer in how they exist because the behavior and aspects in them would generally be considered unconventional to other, not queer people. and tbh!!!!! even to queer people sometimes fuck!!!!!

i get really defensive about this because its my lived experience several times over. in fact discussing it now just gave me a huge OHHH SHIT moment about my current situation

[enihk-writes]

[rotbb headcanons_001]

anon asked: How would Chung myung react if someone declared love to him? Like someone he doesn’t have feelings for or barely knows, would he just be like “get away from me” while being considerate, or “get away from me” while openly hating that person

character: pbss!chung myung (AND) mhdd!chung myung

summary: chung myung rejection headcanons

author's note: honest to god i didn't see this ask until like today,,,

═══════════════

CHUNG MYUNG would probably respond to the confession differently based on the person who's confessing to him. like his attitude will range from disconnect to hostility depending on which of the categories the person would fall into.

STRANGERS

CHUNG MYUNG would try to get this over with as soon as possible. honestly, he might not even look at that other person in the eyes as he's turning them down.

oh. uh... sorry? i don't feel that way about you?

CHUNG MYUNG would feel really awkward at that moment and after he's done saying his part he would get out of that place quickly before the other person can respond. his philosophy is — the fewer headaches you have the better.

ONE OF THE OTHER MT HUA DISCIPLES

PBSS!CHUNG MYUNG would find it funny. this is probably someone he's grown up with since childhood so no matter what, he just can't see that person in a romantic light. for the shits and giggles though, he would remember this and proceed to tease that person for years and years until they are sick of this guy.

MHDD!CHUNG MYUNG would be appalled. what do you mean you liked him? before he rejects them he might ask if that person has brain damage from the training he's put them through. when he sees that there really isn't anything wrong with them, he would turn them down, it's not harsh but it is direct and blunt.

MHDD!CHUNG MYUNG can't see that person as anything other than one of his kids, if only they knew he wasn't as young as he looked. he can't really fault them for feeling this way, he knows he is easy on the eyes in his second life and at their age, it was common to have crushes or fall for a good-looking face easily.

ONE OF HIS ALLIES

CHUNG MYUNG would give it a few seconds to pretend he was considering his options before he rejected the person. human emotions were so fickle, that he couldn't be certain his ally today wouldn't stab him in the back tomorrow ��� all because of a broken heart. though, if that person handled his rejection with grace, he would view them a little more favorability than before. even if he was doing his best to avoid crossing paths with that person.

ONE OF HIS ENEMIES

CHUNG MYUNG has to be held back from pouncing ahead and trying to rip off the other person's face. what the hell? wipe that look off your face! he would let loose a string of curses, he wouldn't hide his utter disgust with the person. he thinks that this is most certainly some sick, sick, joke getting played on him at that moment. and he swears up and down that he just saw a smug look so let go of him and let him clean up that person's attitude!

CHUNG MYUNG is not a kind man to his enemies, so the moment he gets a chance to get rid of them — best bet that that's his first order of business.

═══════════════

end thoughts: personally, i think that chung myung might lean deep into the aroace spectrum and i do think he is the type to love his friends and family so deeply that there just isn't room for anything else. on that note, i believe he loves tang bo — just not in the romantic or sexual way that allo relationships are... i don't know how to explain it tbh but i just know? i mean it takes one aroace bitch (me) to recognise another like we're pokemon in the wild.