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I’ve been re-reading this Psychonauts fic by @magicalmilly and my GOD this scene never fails to make me laugh. Anyway this is my petition to PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE continue this fic it’s been unfinished since 2022 and it was JUST REACHING THE CLIMAX OF PSYCHONAUTS 1-
Anyway the basic plot of the fic is that Milla and Sasha are very concerned about Raz because of what he shares about his family life. High key recommend, Raz gets to apologize for intruding on Milla’s nightmares.
#anon’s art#psychonauts razputin#psychonauts#psychonauts fanart#psychonauts fanfiction#milla vodello#sasha nein#fanart#bright colors#bright colours cw#eye strain tw#eye strain#child abuse mention#child abuse ment cw#idk how obvious it is but Mills and Sasha are speaking via telepathy rn
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I hate how they demonized attention-seeking behavior, as if it somehow makes you bad to need attention, especially as a child.
I’ve had fantasies of bad things happening to me and those closest to me, and getting attention, pity, and love because of it, for most of my life. Is this normal? No. Does it mean I am a bad person who actually wants bad things to happen to the people I love? No. Does it make me self-absorbed to crave attention that badly? No.
There’s always a reason that people do things “just for attention”. And it is rarely what people think it is.
I grew up feeling so guilty for doing things for attention, and ended up not getting the attention and help I needed because of that guilt.
Self harm is a good example of something that is often said to be done “just for attention”. And you know what? Yes, I have hurt myself for attention. And nobody understood why I would do something like that to myself.
But when you are so desperate for someone to see you, to hear you, to help you, that you would literally die to get someone to show they care, it makes a lot more sense.
Let’s try to be more understanding about attention-seeking behavior. Let’s see it for what it is: a legitimate call for help. Not a sign of self-centeredness.
#actually cptsd#childhood trauma#emotional neglect#child abuse#attention seeking#trauma#osddid#sh ment tw
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I've been noticing a lot of people in the radqueer community hiding behind vague harmful identities. Here is a short dictionary of what they really mean, with sources:
Xenosatanism
abolition of age of consent
pro bestiality
pro 'real cp'
believes in "non-consensual but harmless sexual interaction" and its legalization
also, this paragraph: "Destigmatization and desacralization to some extent of rape, molestation, sexual abuse (bcs of a priori and retrospective harm induced by internalized social norms. Tho, we don’t want harmful rape to be fully legal)"
Basedqueer
pro nonconsensual abuse
pro "cisharmfuls who arent seeking recovery / want to get worse"
pro real cults, harassment, self harm and eating disorder encouragement
pro contact
pro "minor made porn / minor sexual material"
Lacedqueer
pro rape and noncon abuse
meant to be a combination between basedqueer and LSDqueer
Noxiaqueer
pro bestiality
pro CP
pro xenosatanism and basedqueer
"neutral" and "flexible" about stalking, harassment, suicide baiting, cults, rape, and non consensual activities
LSDqueer
pro rape
pro CP
Alternatefreak
pro harassment, abuse, cults, and murder
see also: "Pro abuse terminology on Tumblr", and my screenshot of what "MSM/MMP" means (minor sexual material / minor made pornography) (edit: hyperlinks broke in this paragraph, edited to fix)
#radqueer#rqc🌈🍓#pro rq 🌈🍓#rq community#rq 🌈🍓#xenosatanism#basedqueer#lacedqueer#lsdqueer#alternatefreak#discourse#anti abuse#rape tw#abuse tw#harassment tw#noncon tw#rape mention#rape ment#harassment ment#harassment mention#abuse mention#abuse ment#noncon mention#noncon ment#tw rape#tw abuse#cp mention#anti xenosatanist#anti basedqueer#anti lacedqueer
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This is your reminder that abusive people can do good things, but they are still abusive!
They can help you
They can save your life
They can be nice to you
But this doesn’t excuse their abuse, and it doesn’t make your experience any less valid
#tw abuse#tw abuse mention#abuse tw#abuse mention#abuse ment tw#did#system#osdd#did system#mental illness#ptsd#cpstd#abuse survivor#abuse victim
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I just wanna throw my two cents out there as someone who is on the bigger end of the CDD community (I think? We have 100+ followers)
I'm punk. I'm a system. So why am I afraid to use the syspunk tags?
Our old host was pretty active and vocal in cpunk spaces because qi was tired of feeling silenced by doctors for having arthritis at a young age. Qi felt empowered and supported by a community that understood qis struggles. But with the way that things are going now, I cannot see myself active in syspunk spaces (or at least on tumblr. If there was a discord server, I might consider it.)
Punk is anti establishment. Punk is against the grain. Punk is being angry and fighting the system and taking no shit and advocating for the oppressed. But if there's going to be endos claiming refuge in the community that was SPECIFICALLY MADE TO COMBAT THEIR IDEOLOGY, I will not join. I do not want to subject me OR my system to harassment from endos and their supporters.
If you're somehow an endo that I don't have blocked, here's the thing:
You make me feel unsafe. Actively.
I have suffered immesurable trauma and abuse of all kinds. I feel as though endos are appropriating my struggles to seem quirky or relatable. Being abused since infancy is not a quirky personality trait. It robbed us of our formative developmental years, and now I have a disorder that makes the average mentally healthy person shudder.
There is a very large overlap between cpunk and syspunk I think. Fighting for our voices to be heard and understood by medical professionals unites our causes. Endogenics are the antithesis of this movement, because, BY DEFINITION, they are NOT medical systems.
I have a medical disorder. Yes, I also see my alters as separate people and treat them as such, but that does not change the fact that we would not exist if it weren't for our trauma. Our trauma is intristictly woven into our very being. There is no Horror Crew without trauma. There is no ME without trauma. You cannot peel back that layer to find anything hiding underneath. It runs so deep that I'm not even sure what healing would even look like for us.
DID is an ugly disorder. It comes hand in hand with some of the most demonized symptoms in the entire DSM. Syspunk is beautiful because it allows us a space to openly talk about these symptoms and struggles without being silenced.
Or at least it would be in theory! Jesus fucking Christ. We're just as traumatized as fucking war veterans. Would you go to a veteran support group and ask for resources if you weren't one? No. You'd be turned down and told to fuck off. So do it. Fuck off.
#actually did#actuallydid#osddid#syspunk#system punk#cpunk#cripplepunk#actuallytraumagenic#actually traumagenic#sysblr#endos dni#endos fuck off#anti endo#abuse mention#abuse ment tw#abuse tw#phil
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if you have any more thoughts on the Joker Junior extending the family take I'd love to hear them!! Would J be interested in having Nightwing with them? Or Alfred? I'm not sure how well either of them would take to the venom, but if they have Batman anything's possible
Less ideas and more of an actual fic, oopsie!
---
Three weeks. Three long, agonizing weeks without Tim. Three weeks of hoping beyond all hope that he was somehow fine. That they'd all look back on this and laugh.
But, no. Eventually, Bruce was able to get word that The Joker and Harley had holed themselves up in the abandoned Arkham Asylum, and something in his gut that made him sick knew there was some correlation.
Part of him hadn't wanted Barbara to come along, but he also knew he wouldn't be able to stop her even if he tried. So, the two of them traversed through the crumbling asylum together and followed the echoing sound of Harley's voice singing a lullaby.
“Hush, little baby, don't say a word,
Mama's gonna buy you a mockingbird,
And if that mockingbird don't sing,
Mama's gonna buy you a diamond ring….”
Closer, closer. It took both of them every bit of will they had not to sprint through the halls as fast as their legs could carry them. As Harley’s voice grew even louder, Barbara split up to find another way in while Bruce took the lead. His heart nearly leapt from his chest with anticipation as he closed in on her location.
“And if that diamond ring is brass,
Mama's gonna buy you a looking glass,
And if that looking glass gets broke-”
The moment Harley saw him burst through the double doors, she perked up, greeting Bruce with a smile. She was cradling a flower vase in her arms, which she set down onto a covered table. Craning her neck, she shouted over her shoulder. “Puddin’, Hubby's home!”
Bruce’s eyes followed Harley’s gaze, spotting Joker on the second floor where he rested on a recliner. With a flourish, The Clown rose to his feet, turning away from his rabbit-eared television set and popping a pipe from his mouth, tossing it aside.
“Well, hello, dear!” Joker strolled down the stairs, stopping just shy of Batman. He wrapped an arm around Harley, the two of them smiling sweetly at their bat. “Welcome home.”
Bruce all but snarled in their faces, leaning close and baring his teeth. “Where's Robin?”
Both clowns shared a quizzical look.
“Robin?” Joker repeated with a quirk of his head. “There's no Robin here!”
“Maybe he means our little J,” Harley offered.
The Clown Prince of Crime snapped his fingers. “Of course! That's it.”
Meeting the Bat's eyes, smiling back at his scowl, Joker gestured to the other side of the room. To whatever was being concealed behind the large blue curtain. And Bruce couldn't help his rage, shoving the couple aside roughly as he moved to cross the room.
The Joker stumbled back, recovering with the shake of his head and click of his tongue. “He must be so stressed out from work.”
“I hate it when he gets like this. He never knows when ta relax,” Harley shook her head and reached underneath the table, pulling out a bazooka from beneath the tablecloth. She fired, and a band of ribbons erupted from the muzzle, knocking Batman to the floor with a hard thud and wrapping him up like a gift - bow and all.
“Good thing he has us. Hmm, now what say we bring this little gift of ours back to the bedroom to unwrap?”
Joker's grin stretched just a little wider as he noticed the movement of Batman's hand - holding it up just so as if to signal someone, just out of eyesight, to stand down. Joker's eyes crinkled. Perfect. He wondered, was it the eldest birdboy? Or maybe they'd be getting two bats with one stone?
“Y'know, Bat's, we've been doing this little run around for years,” Joker spoke again, approaching his prone enemy. “It's been loads of laughs! But the sad fact is - none of us are getting any younger.”
Harley joined his side, patting her stomach. “That ol’ clock's a tickin’!”
“Quite right, Pooh! So, Harley and I were thinking it's about time the three of us finally settled down together.”
“But rather than experiencing the joys of pregnancy, we decided the best way would be to just marry into the family.”
Hand-in-hand, the clowns walked over their Bat's prone form to each rest a hand on the curtain in front of them.
“But no matter how happy we are to join you, we were a bit disappointed that we didn't really have the chance to nurture them, too,” Joker lamented. “And after all, what better way to officially join the family than to impart a little bit of our personalities to the kiddos? He needed a bit of molding, of course, but-”
The couple yanked on each side of the curtain, the blue cloth sliding and billowing out as it parted - revealing a child strapped to a medical examination table.
“... What kid doesn't?” Joker finished with a grin, drinking in the Dark Knight's reaction.
Bruce couldn't help the exhale of ‘no’ that left him. Couldn't even blink, too horrified to look away from what had been done to Tim. The horror set in all at once, like freezing water flooding through every nerve in his system.
Joker brought Tim forward with the click of a button, the table rolling forward and bringing the boy into the light.
Tim...
His face an acid-washed white. His hair an unearthly green. His Robin costume now replaced with an exact recreation of Joker's own suit. And his face… Contorted in a pained smile and his eyes wide and afraid, unblinking.
“Say hello to Dada, JJ,” Joker cooed.
Tim's eyes, seeming to glow red in the light, shifted from Joker to Batman. He leaned further into the light, locking eyes with Bruce, and laughed. He laughed in a way Bruce had never, ever heard before. He unbound himself from the table, leaping to the floor on scrawny legs - God, how much weight had he lost in such a short amount of time. What had they done to his boy?
All at once, the cold shock and dawning horror inside Bruce shifted - and his whole body was alight with rage, like a fire inside threatening to escape through every orifice as he ripped through his bonds. The shout he made was near inhuman, launching a batarang he had cut the ribbons with directly at Joker's head, only for the Clown to dodge it with ease.
Harsh giggles flooded from Joker's throat, wiggling a finger in a ‘come hither’ motion before jumping onto the now vacant medical table, rocketing off with the click of a button, causing Bruce to almost stumble and reorient himself to take off after him - and leaving Barbara to deal with Harley.
—
Giggles bubbled from Tim JJ's throat as he stared unblinkingly down at his father, body crumpled on the floor, cape draped almost protectively over his prone body. And with giddy glee, The Joker Papa J hopped down from the giant building blocks he was perched upon, where he had sliced at Batman and sent him tumbling down only seconds ago.
It was all a blur for Bruce. The chase. The horrific videos of Tim… Tim's torture. Three weeks. Three weeks of that Hell. Electrocution. Beatings. Torment. Starvation. And it was all his fault. He'd failed him. The rage that had filled him nearly completely, made him seen red, had all been snuffed out.
First Jason. Now Tim. And Bruce still couldn't bring him to end this. His vision swam, and he could barely even focus. Not on Tim. Not on the man who tortured him. But… Wait. Where was-?
With a final hop, Joker landed in front of Batman in a crouch, hovering over him with a sly grin.
“You've lost, Bruce,” He rasped, and just hearing the name on the clown's lips made JJ seize up, his forever-smile momentarily twitching and a flood of nervous giggles escaping him. The clown continued, voice low. “Robin is mine… And now, so are you.”
And with a hearty heft, Joker lifted Bruce up by the scruff of his cowl and cape, as if presenting him. The grin of his face, the look in his eyes, as he looked down on his enemy. So proud of himself, so smug.
And Bruce. He looked in a daze, lost and beaten. Blood dripped from his lips.
This isn't what Papa promised. He said everything would be okay now. That he'd see Dad and Dick and Babs and Alfred again and he wouldn't be mean or hurt him again, because Papa knew he would be good now…
But when Joker met his eyes, something in them changed - his smile warping to somehow become comforting, happier. The darkness in his eyes dissipated, replaced with an excited shine. And with a free hand, The Clown grabbed for a large gun that looked more like a toy than anything.
“Here ya go, sonny-boy!” He said, tossing the weapon.
JJ scrambled forward to catch it. He couldn't help but notice how light the gun felt as he cradled it in his shaking, gloved hands. For a moment, he couldn't look away.
“Make him one of us,” The Joker urged, voice like a hiss.
It wasn't a conscious decision to aim the gun. It just happened. Like one minute, JJ was there and gone and back again. His hands shook so hard that he could hardly keep the weapon straight. Could barely even look at him. At the mask. At the man behind it.
“Tim…” Batman breathed. JJ had never heard his voice sound so small.
JJ would swear he couldn't breathe if it weren't for the rapid rise and fall of his chest and the wheezing, giggling exhales that escaped him as he struggled to calm down. Tears threatened to pool from his eyes.
This wasn't right. But, Papa knows best. He said everything would be okay afterward. He said he wouldn't be punished again. But, he couldn't. But, he couldn't run, either - too scared. Too weak. He wanted to be home. He wanted his family. He wanted to stop crying, to be able to breathe, to run into his fathers’ arms-
“It's alright now, JJ,” The Joker soothed, recapturing the boy's attention. “Just pull the trigger, and everything will be okay.”
JJ wanted his Papa to be telling the truth. He just wanted everything to be okay. He just wanted it all to stop. Bruce, please forgive him.
His finger squeezed around the trigger-
Joker's laugh filled the room, just as a green mist began flooding from the gun’s opening. It spread through the air and quickly covered both men. Joker laughed long and loud as he clung to Batman. He pulled his Bat into an embrace, a smile so bright and wide it made the corners of his mouth rip, as Bruce began to choke and hack.
The man seized up and shook in Joker's arms. Slow at first, but soon trembling and writhing in agony, barely restrained and pained chuckles escaping him. So much hurt flooding through every nerve and system that almost faculties left him. His lungs burned, his face ached, he couldn't feel his extremities and wouldn't have been able to hold himself up without Joker's hold on him. Bruce wasn't sure if he could speak or even breathe anymore, but somehow his body found it in itself to betray him, forcing laughter from gritted teeth.
Joker took a knee, gently laying Batman to the ground. The bat spasmed and jerked. Tears began to fall from behind his mask, shining on his cheeks in the light. Gloved hands caressed the sides of Bruce's face. Green eyes glinted in the light as they watched each movement of the other man - every sputter, every gasp, every choked out laugh, every pained, slowly blooming smile that wobbled onto his face.
“You must be so scared, aren't you, sweetheart?” Joker cooed. “You've been scared this whole time, haven't you? Ever since that night in the alleyway...”
Batman didn't reply - couldn't. His eyes crinkled as his smile grew involuntarily. All he could do was return the man's gaze with a manic smile that wasn't his own.
Joker stroked the top of his cowl lovingly. “But it's okay now, Bruce. You don't have to be scared anymore. You don't have to be strong. Don't have to hold yourself back. Me and Harl will build you back up to what you were meant to be. We'll be brave for you now. And do you know why?”
Bruce couldn't respond. For one, the agony of whatever this was, whatever Joker had planned for him, blotted out almost all thoughts in his mind completely. Could only tremble and writhe and cry and laugh. Laugh. Laugh. The laughing made it hurt just a little less. But he could still barely even register what the other man was saying. What he could register, though, was the image of Joker slowly leaning down to press his lips to Bruce's cloaked forehead.
“Because we love you.” Joker finished.
—
“Ohhhh, Harley!” Joker's voice rang through the cavernous halls of the abandoned asylum. “Barbie's turn!”
Barbara's stomach sunk to her feet and her heart skipped a beat. Barbie? No. No, there was no way, he could have known her name. Oh God, what happened to Bruce-?
In the middle of her ruminations, Harley caught her by surprise. A jab to the face, the pull of her leg to trip her up leaving her scrambling to correct her fall- only for her to feel hand grasp tightly at the nape of her neck, coiling painfully at the root of her hair. She was shoved onto her stomach, face-to-face with the dirty, cracked tiles of the former asylum’s floor.
“You know what that means! C'mon, Barbie,” Harley grunted, fingers twisting in the roots of her hair. She lunged forward, slamming her face to the floor with a sick crunch. “Let's go party!”
And everything went dark.
… Barbara awoke with a groan. The smell of pennies flooded her nostrils. Her vision was bleary and swam as she struggled to open her eyes.
A dark figure entered her vision from her periphery, and it loomed over a figure clad in purple. And for a moment, just one moment, she allowed herself to hope.
But, that hope crumbled just as quickly as Joker's voice entered her ears.
“You're okay, Bruce, you're okay, sweetie. You're gonna play nice now, right?”
Barbara couldn't help but shudder at the sound of Bruce's laugh in reply.
Hands found their way to Barbara's hair again, this time much softer. Not grabbing, just brushing and stroking almost soothingly.
“Wakey, wakey, eggs ‘n bakey,” Harley sang as she carded her hands through the younger woman's hair. “Y'know, I've always wanted a daughter. A little girl of my own. You think you'd ever want Mama to braid your hair for you? It's so pretty!”
“Ah, welcome back to the land of the living, Barbie,” Joker greeted. “Your Dad and I were just talking about you. A real chip off the ol’ block. Now all we need is to make it official.”
Barbara watched as Tim approached Bruce, pushing a gun of some kind into his hands. The Batman held it in his hands, smiling down at the weapon - but seemed almost hesitant. Unsure. Like he knew this was wrong. Like the weapon would somehow come alive and bite him.
“Batman, listen to me,” Batgirl pleaded. “Don't do this. Whatever they've done to you, this isn't you.”
“Oh, but it is! And soon it'll be you, too,” Harley corrected, walking back to give herself some distance.
“I know you're torn, Batsy, but I promise this is for the best,” Joker rubbed circles into the other man's back. “We'll all finally be together. Once we get Barbie here, then we'll get Dick and Al. And we'll be a family! They'll never be hurt again. You'll never be hurt again, sweetheart. I won't let anything bad happen anymore. You'll get your happily ever after. You won't be afraid ever again, I promise.���
Tears stung at Barbara's cheeks as she begged. “Batman, please!”
And for a moment, she thought she somehow got through to him. They locked eyes and Bruce smiled at her with a smile that isn't his own. But, she thought she could see understanding or recognition or something in his eyes, and was sure he'd toss the gun away and start kicking Joker's ass.
But, she was wrong.
With a hiss, green toxin flooded all around her. Even over her screams, the sounds of Joker, Tim, Harley, and Bruce's laughter smothered her completely. And soon after, so did her own.
#yandere x character#poly Yandere#familial yandere#platonic yandere#batjokes#batjarley#batjoquinn#torture mention#torture tw#torture cw#child abuse mention#child abuse tw#child abuse cw#child abuse ment cw#yandere x character x yandere#joker junior#joker jr#batman beyond: return of the joker#yandere#yandere joker#yandere Harley Quinn#yandere Harleen Quinzel#jokerized#blood
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romulus roy (succession) x mindless koЯn indulgence's - here to stay (remix) — brainrot presents:
𓆩♡𓆪 photoset
#sh ment tw#whew ! (ノω<。)ノ))☆.。#succession#dog motif#roman roy#song association#mecore tbh#character analysis#kenrome#ig??#cycles of abuse#connor roy#dysfunctional perspective#logan roy#succession meta#like father like son#song lyrics#romulus roy#kendall logan roy#dog moodboard#hbo succession#this has been plaguing me for days#original post
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God I’m begging. On all hands and knees. If you are going to write Miguel in a fic. Read his comics. Go to his wiki page. Do RESEARCH. Because I am sick and tired of people mischaracterizing Miguel ESPECIALLY here on Tumblr. It’s ridiculous.
Like my guy is not flirtatious. He’s a pathetic sad little nerd (Affectionate) who alienates himself from everyone and doesn’t know how to express his feelings so he just becomes overtly sarcastic. That’s Miguel.
Also y’all. REMEMBER THAT GABRIEL EXISTS. HE HAS A FAMILY.
Lastly Miguel was abused as a child. Hes tried unaliving himself. Miguel has trauma that isn’t just his daughter dying.
So yeah. Miguel is a complex character. I get it. But again, it is not hard to do research on him and his character. I beg. I’m tired of the blatant Mischaracterization of him. Please please PLEASE read his comics or at least read his wiki page. Anything. I’m done with him being written as a completely different character.
#miguel ohara#spiderman 2099#marvel comics#across the spiderverse#atsv#Snorlax rambles#abuse ment tw#child abuse ment cw#suicide ment tw#you can also ask me or other Miguel comic experts for advice and recs too#like I don’t mind#just please try to do research on this man before writing him because he’s a extremely complex character
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"Ford doesn't see Stan as a person and fics where he's made to feel guilty and realize he's not the only one who's ever suffered are good actually!"
SHUT UP!!!! God, the fact that you all actually believe that is so ridiculous. You guys are literally engaging with a version of this series that only exists in your head.
Just admit you hate autistic-coded abuse victims and go.
#ford haters are the most insufferable people in this fandom#yes. ford hurt stan.#but stan also hurt ford#also ford knows he's not the only one who's ever suffered#also ford absolutely sees stan as a person.#THEY WERE FIGHTING. THAT'S WHY THEY DIDN'T GET ALONG.#NEITHER STAN NOR FORD ACTED PERFECTLY!#also those fics are terrible and only exist to villify ford#and are lowkey ableist#since they're usually demonizing ford for not having good social skills or being emotionally intelligent#and definitely villify him for having low empathy#gravity falls#fandumb#fandom ableism#stan pines#stanley pines#grunkle stan#ford pines#stanford pines#grunkle ford#filthy ford apologist squad#ford defense squad#ford protection squad#stan twins#vagueblogging#abuse ment tw
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i literally read the book of bill days ago but its only now kinda hitting me how fucked ford and bills whole thing was though cause ford literally talks about being so unable to sleep (to try to keep bill away), and when sleep inevitably caught up to him, he would wake up to his body abused and things messed with and he just couldnt seem to find an escape (and he literally didnt get to truly escape until 30 years later)
(also keeping people awake for unhealthily long periods of time is another tactic used to mess with and control people because of how it impairs brain function)
listing off the things we see in those few pages in the book of bill:
i mean, punching and scratching at a steel door for hours would be so damaging to your hands and probably hurt like hell for at least 2 days after. then bill says he was hitting fords head against a wall, though its said in a post-it as if its a joke, but he also isnt exactly above doing that, and honestly he says most things like its a joke.
i also dont need to say 'bill really doesnt know how to take no for an answer' because he makes that very clear in literally any interaction we see with him.
bill literally puts a venomous snake near ford while fords asleep, which could have killed him if he wasnt lucky+skilled enough to deal with it.
he nearly gives ford hypothermia, and in the same action actively threatens ford with the idea of making him jump off of a high spot, and like ford says, doesnt do it just so he can send a message to ford about how hes the one in control.
he gets ford in trouble with not only the law, but also with other people that are probably not very happy with him after. he mutilates fords body in several ways, and i dont think i need to go into detail on them because theyre... so ew. and he even exposes part of fords body to the world. like, its just taking his shirt off, but thats still showing off his body in a way that he didnt agree to or want
and then he attempts to (or purposefully fails to) call stan, using fords voice to threaten suicide and tell stan that ford never loved him.
and he punctuates it with a final power move, in a hallucination that he creates, hes messing with stans memories and making him feel like his body was basically about to implode
and like. okay, we all joke about toxic old man yaoi, and its a good joke and toxic old man yaoi is great and its an interesting ship, but holy fuck.
like. to say the absolute least, that had to be so, so deeply violating. its no wonder that when we see ford in the past, when he finally contacts stan, he looks like hes on the verge of shattering into a million pieces. he just went through, and still wasnt yet out of, some deeply abusive shit.
like... everything coming out lately both in this book and what ive heard is on the website, mixed with what we already knew from the show itself... the stans are both so, so fucking tragic dude. their whole lives were thrown away over things that really didnt even need to be the way they were, and then they both get into situations that are pretty damn screwed, and those situations follow them for the rest of their lives. its basically a miracle that things worked out in the end for them.
i dont really have a point, i just had to talk about all that. i read almost all of the book of bill in one sitting, and while i was really enjoying it, i was also getting kind of tired of sitting in one spot only doing this one thing for several hours straight. i still felt a lot of the emotional bits of it of course, but man this part specifically just really didnt hit me until now.
i mean, to say the absolute least, i know what its like to feel violated in a similar way, though not anywhere near to the extent of what he went through at all. someone get that man some therapy got damn
#my post#gravity falls#billford#// abuse ment#abuse tw#<- i dont really know the tags to use so if anyone sees this and feels that i didnt do enough. i can add more#long post#BY THE WAY THIS IS NOT A BILL HATE POST IF THAT EVEN MAKES SENSE#like fuck that dude for being so fucked up but also hes still such a fascinating and honestly fun character.#hes not a real person so its not like im being like 'oh but hes so charming so idc that he did all that'#like i very much care that he did all that but hes also. still just a fictional character#and yet again i repeat the sentiment: holy fuck i cant believe disney approved this book#they really said. 'this is one of our most beloved non-movie franchises#the creator wants to write another book in the series but this time its for mature audiences#and hes going to write out how the beloved villain of the show and one of the most important and beloved characters are in a deeply abusive#relationship. this is now an approved part of the disney brand!'#again i dont disapprove. i think this is a great addition.#but im so shocked that this was approved by 'the owl house doesnt fit our brand' disney.#i still refuse to stop believing that disney was just being homophobic about the owl house btw idc what anyone says#also no i wont go into detail on how i relate. but the connections are there and its.. wow.
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fundamentally disinterested in the recurring discourse about kevin's drinking that aims to a) make it his Specific Problem To Focus On And Overcome when it is a crutch and coping mechanism to get him through a Much Bigger Problem (emotional fallout he can't square with by himself, culture shock, trauma, loss of his extremely wildly co-dependent relationship w riko, losing the structure of the nest, mourning a future he was meant to have, processing a grave injustice, anger and fear and desperate grief, all of which is his Actual Specific Fox Problem) while he builds himself back up, and b) thinks that even if it is a problem (more on that later), it's the foxes' problem to deal with.
like. it's just not.
yeah, he doesn't drink until he meets them. they gave him that habit, and in traditional terms, they're (the monsters specifically) a 'bad influence'. but these are the foxes. this is kevin day, son of exy, whose meteor is crashing spectacularly through no fault of his own. there are no traditional terms to be found here. the framework for it literally doesn't exist. neil comes into the foxes with more conventional expectations—appalled at the athletes' substance use, his horror at matt's trip to columbia, his steadfast and early repeated stance that none of the foxes should let andrew treat them the way he does, and certainly not nicky—and tends to engage with them less as the series goes on and he folds himself into the foxes. the thing about the foxes is that they've all been in pits deeper than they are tall. and some of them got a helping hand on the way—erik, andrew's extreme intervention methods, stephanie walker—and wymack was always waiting for them on the other side, ready to throw down a rope, but all the foxes dragged themselves out of their own holes. often not alone, often not without assistance, but at the end of the day, they have to do it.
there's that line neil has about aaron in that scene that got deleted when the timeline shifted around, when he thinks about how aaron got this far in life on his own, surviving on willpower and sheer desperation. that applies to aaron in a way that's a little more acute than some of the rest of them—boy who doesn't let the foxes in bc of andrew, boy who doesn't let nicky in bc he doesn't know how, boy made of flinching and seeking an escape and grieving the one who hurt him—but is broadly true for the foxes en masse.
this isn't to say the foxes can't help each other, but it's not their job. it just isn't. they'll keep kevin alive, keep him safe, keep him flanked and contained within their ranks. they'll fight tooth and nail in this battle with him, fight to get him to that championship game, fight to get that trophy in his hands. but that's all they've agreed to. that's all they're responsible for, in this covenant they've made with him. he says they can make this happen, and they're going to get him to that final game, but it's up to him what state he's in when he gets there.
like. they're foxes. they've been triaging their whole lives. they hate each other and they hate everyone else more. they're the kids with their backs up against the wall. half of them are addicts. i don't think kevin is comparable, personally; he's getting through a horrific situation with a coping mechanism. that's not the same thing as battling yourself to stop using. but that's not really the point of this. what i'm getting at here is that to the foxes, it's easy math: kevin who can lean on vodka and andrew and wymack and the foxes to stay upright when he's not ready to stand on his own two feet is still a kevin who is standing. a kevin with one less piece of scaffolding to lean on is a kevin who falls over, a kevin at risk of complete collapse, a kevin one phone call away from running back to the master, a kevin one crucial loss away from not ever making it back to himself at all. they're triaging. this is low on the totem pole of things they have the room to care about. they very much have bigger problems, both individually and even just kevin-related. if alcohol makes seeing the boy he knew best in the world and moved in tandem with his whole life and who destroyed their entire legacy and his entire life in one move — if alcohol makes facing that boy easier to stomach, then, fuck, why would they take that away? they're foxes. they've all got their demons. this is what kevin needs this year and a half to let him face his, that's all. they can understand that. it doesn't have to be pretty, as long as it keeps him in the fight. that's the priority.
i think there's absolutely space to explore this in fic and art and fandom in a way that maybe does explore it as a Problem, both that it's an active problem for kevin & that it's something to explore other foxes helping him with (there's a t&n fic that i've been gnawing at the bit to read for months that seems poised to explore this premise, and that's super up my alley)! i just think we're in different territory when we're talking about the series—and its characters and dynamics—in a conversational rather than transformational way, and end up talking about this like the foxes are responsible for kevin's choices. i love kevin day. i read these back at the start of 2015 & he's so dear to me that loving him was the blueprint for how i feel abt kageyama. but it's been pretty weird to see how the conversation has been translating Loving Kevin Day into... thinking the foxes are doing wrong by him with respect to this in actual canon. like that's just not how it operates there
#kevin day#aftg#aftg is a sports anime story that's mostly about survival. it's no surprise they're all aiming to Get Through This Year‚ first and foremost#personally i don't think kevin is an alcoholic. that's a specific term that means something that i don't think means kevin.#i understand why people apply it to him with the way it's used colloquially a lot but like. that doesn't make it true#but i'm also not particularly interested in hashing that out and litigating it#i've seen people with more specific and relevant Personal experience than me try that and it fell on deaf ears#so i don't particularly care to waste my breath there. that's not the main point of this anyway#i am saying that i don't think kevin's drinking is the Capital P Problem but mostly i'm saying even if it is. that's not the foxes' issue#like in the most basic truth sense. it just isn't. you can wish they did or think friends should or whatever but like.#you have to remember who they are. they're not the trojans. they're not the gangsey. they're foxes.#they wanted to mutiny against kevin within twelve hours of him opening his mouth but they still voted to keep him. ykwim.#they're not here to hold his hand but they will keep him intact.#like. they're gonna get him to the championship game. he promises them that and they promise in turn to show up and get there.#but they're only in charge of making it there. it's entirely up to him what state he's in when he gets there.#this isn't to say that they wouldn't care; it's that the foxes have been triaging their entire fucking lives.#kevin with alcohol in his hand is a kevin who can stand up on the court and face riko instead of giving up. it's a shield.#absolutely there's an argument that it's not healthy but like. Cs get degrees. if this gets him through‚ then it gets him through.#alcohol tw#alcoholism ment //#substance abuse ment //
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every time i stumble on some vocal incest shipper in unrelated tags i become more and more convinced 90% of people don’t actually understand what incest is. like, at all
#incest ment#also none of these people ever trigger tag their shit!#i have to filter the word incest bc if i filtered like Hashtag Incest TW nothing would ever get filtered#also the irony to me of these people trying to do like Social Justice Education about other shit but neverrrr like#so much as reblogging a link to RAINN or whatever#i am going to start making spn fans read that abused boys book before they’re allowed to post online#the self help one i had to read back in the day#I WASNT EVEN IN YHE SPN TAG. LIKE. HELP
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hmm. i'm usually not one to post about these topics but i think i've gathered enough thoughts on wilbur's abysmal apology towards shelby to form a cohesive message.
WARNING: the rest of the post will discuss abuse and also a lot of my personal experiences as someone who has hurt other people in the past. obviously not to the extent that wilbur has, but please move on it you don’t want to see it. thank you and stay safe.
being stuck in a hard place, whether it be living conditions, mental conditions, or any other factor, will naturally hurt the person going through those tough times. and hurt people hurt people. but i think there's a pretty Big Fucking Difference between doing bad things in the past and actually owning up to your actions after regretting it VS doing bad things in the past and turning a blind eye against those you've hurt to wallow in your own ego and misery.
i’ve experienced my fair share of abusive friendships, but when i was fifteen, i WAS the toxic friend. (yes, i’m aroace. friendships aren’t the same as a romantic relationship but they can be just as strong. i value my platonic bonds as much as allos value their marriages or date partners.) i was going through a huge depressive episode. it was tough for me, but during that time, i made fun of my friends' interests to their faces because i couldn't personally understand it, and i also vagueposted about the little things they did that ticked me off right where they could see it. it got to the point where they had to make a separate group chat to talk about their interests where i wouldn’t see it. i hurt all of them, and it ended in them confronting me about my actions. they put me in my place and called me out for my horrible attitude.
after seeing my friends' perspectives, i realized just how awful i was to them and sincerely apologized to each of them. i recognized their feelings towards my actions and didn't make excuses. even though i was going through a hard time myself, my abuse towards them was absolutely NOT justified. as i recovered, i made sure not to hurt them any more, and years later, our friendships are still going strong.
my experiences aren't nearly as extreme as what wilbur has done to shelby, but i think it's pretty fucking clear that his apology was flaming dog shit served on a trash dump. like, i was a fifteen year old. he's a Grown Ass Man with a big platform. he dug his own grave by talking about himself first instead of actually addressing his mistreatment of shelby first and foremost. he didn't even MENTION shelby by name. talking about his "strides to betterment" without even directing his apology towards the person he actually hurt is just pathetic. that whole spiel about how he "thought" the whole exchange was consensual is fucking wild. he didn't even apologize for that; he moved on right afterwards.
we can infer that wilbur has been struggling with being a person who has done bad things through his songs and lovejoy's music. he might have been going through a hard time and maybe even regretted it (though his apology really makes it seem like he's just doing it for damage control), that STILL doesn't validate any hurt he might have caused. the least he could’ve done is to sincerely apologize to shelby, even if she didn’t accept it. but he couldn’t even do that.
it's just disappointing that, as someone who has a platform of millions of followers, he displayed an act of shallowness. in the end, his attempt at sincerity fell flat and benefited no one, especially not the people he abused. if he had properly apologized, even if his apology wasn't accepted, it would've shown people in a similar situation how to apologize to the people they hurt in the past in a mature and sincere way.
so, yeah. FUCK wilbur soot. focus not on the fact that he has done bad, but that the one he abused didn’t get a proper apology. support shelby and other victims of abuse. listen to their experiences and spread awareness of these cautions. uplift their voices, not his.
for those who have connected to his and lovejoy's music that have gone through a similar dark time in their lives, i also extend my heart out to you. it must also be hard to see someone who reflected your struggles of betterment reveal himself to be someone who really hasn't gotten better at all.
but you don’t have to be like him. you don’t need to follow in his steps as long as you own up to your mistakes, even if you can’t talk to those you hurt anymore. in the end, what matters most is that you apologize in a sincere way and make sure you don’t repeat those mistakes going forward.
you CAN get better. if anything just so spite that british boy’s ass
thank you. kiwi out ✌️
#ask to tag#discourse#am i yapping? maybe#but i just really wanted to say something about it because. ugh#actually not sure how i feel about tagging him any more but i do want to spread the word and trigger tag#shubble#wilbur soot#tw abuse#abuse ment#also after all this i still can’t hate lovejoy. their songs portray the aromantic struggle in ways not many other bands have#but that doesn’t mean i won’t replace their songs in my playlist with a local file upload get fucked lmaooo no money for you until#you get your shit together#kiwi’s calls
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hello everyone! normally we’d wait longer in between server ads, but there have been some pretty major staffing changes lately. so:
are you transmasc? (or an ally. ppl of any gender can join ☝️)
are you 14-19?
are you looking for a discord server?
then i’ve got the perfect place for you >:]
dad’s server for transmasc teens is an inclusive, transmasc focused server with an age range of 14-19! (although people who age out of this range after joining the server can stay)
it’s owned by @lesgay-loser and me, and our other lovely staff members are @cringefail-loser @starrysidereus and @incohorace !!
we offer:
-an active mod team
-an active but not overwhelming community of around 250 members
-tons of useful bots, including pk for systems and a couple game bots!
-channels centered around queer identity
-channels for sharing art, writing, etc
-and more !! look if i listed all the server’s perks we’d be here all day ok. it’s a pretty neat little place
aaand here’s the link !! ik this ad is simpler than usual but like it hasn’t been that long since the last one so. yk
you can also check out our two sibling servers, the haven (13-19) and mlm hideout (14-19).
#rambling#discord server#discord#transmasc#trans#t slur#t slur tw#t slur cw#abuse mention#abuse ment tw#< feels weird just spamming tw tags like that but this is gonna be seen by ppl other than my followers idk what all ppl have blocked
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Putting Libber through the horrors in my brain rn
#giving her substance abuse problems#she was married to a celebrity she probably did heroin or somethin#ninjago#ninjago libber#libber page#libber gordon#drug ment tw
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Purple
A free verse poem of sorts I wrote from Zach’s perspective a while back. It felt right to post it now. Mentions/implications of abuse contained within.
Lilac nails, paint chipped that I help erase.
Purple eyeshadow, hiding the truth that lies underneath.
Violet tear stain that line her face.
Blue violet eyes that shine up at me through the tears.
Purple bruises hidden.
Trailing down her thighs,
Violet ring on her finger,
Hand held in mine.
If he lays so much as one finger on her again he’ll be see violet stars.
Image
#wild kratts#wild kratts au#zach varmitech#wild kratts zach#violet varmitech#ziolet#wild violet au#love zach varmitech#self ship#selfship#f/o x s/i#zach v. posting#poem#original poem#free verse#JIG32 writes#abuse mention#abuse ment tw#tw abuse#tw abuse mention
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