#unreality .

[amtrak-official]

We are proud to announce 2 new amtrak initiatives for Pride Month

Firstly

We will begin tracking down billionaires, tying them to the Northeast Corridor and selling tickets for people to watch the executionfor cheap

And Second,

We will start running Trans Trains

[acquirer-of-the-sire]

went to the kitchen to go get some triscuits and, uh

so much for the triscuits I guess

@realpokemon

[splatoonpolls]

Pufuu cooked (btw this is fake)

[realpokemon]

how tall are you

roughly the size of one blastoise

[inbarfink]

Congrats, you are now a Dragon!

[randomitemdrop]

Oh heck you've got a Bargain Bin of items? I'd like to buy whatever this gets me- $1.89 USD

Item: two-liter bottle of Mtn Dew Bananarama, a banana-flavored limited edition Dew that was cancelled after it turned out there was already a band called that and they couldn't think of another name

[thatsbelievable]

[strangestcase]

bugs need their own Tumblr i think

0 notes

🐝​ sillywasp Follow

This humans house smells like flowers!! 🌸​🌼​🌷 yum!

🐝​ sillywasp Follow

Update: there are no flowers 😭​ I feel so robbed

🐝 sillywasp Follow

Update: they put me in a plastic cup ☹️​

43 tiny notes

🦗​ crashopper Follow

HELP NEEDED

my wife is mad at me :(

​🕷️ tinymeal Follow

Damn that's crazy. Have you tried talking to her.

🪰​​ d1ptteraaaaa Follow

Dude youre a black widow spider I dont think you're qualified to give love advice

🕷️ tinymeal Follow

Actually black widow females only eat the males in extremely stressful situations such as being kept in captivity, my wife and I live in a beautiful meadow and we're fine

🪲​ shiny-turd Follow

Then why is your blog full of vore

🕷️ tinymeal Follow

Can't a man have a fetish

94k tiny notes

🐜​ cottagecore-gate Follow

Milking my beloved aphids! 💖​💓​💖​💓​💖​💓​

🐞​ godslittlecow Follow

:3c

🐜​ cottagecore-gate Follow

dont you FUCKIGN dare

182 tiny notes

🕸️​ sneakyspidey Follow

*sees a mantis crawling overhead* Tsk... such a fool... *into the intercom* attack, mine simps

🦋​ bread-and-butter-fly Follow

Knowing OP is an ant mimic spider makes this a thousant times funnier

🦂​ pseudoabdomen Follow

why do you know so much about ants

🦋​ bread-and-butter-fly Follow

I tricked ants into raising me

🦟 bzz-bzz Follow

Isnt that a little exploitative?

🪳 thecrawlerrrrrr Follow

Ants love being exploited dont listen to the haters

🦟 bzz-bzz Follow

Youre a termite of course youd say that

🪳 thecrawlerrrrrr Follow

That's so fucking racist???

🐛 fluffyfellow Follow

lmao .You are both racist 🙄​

🦂​ pseudoabdomen Follow

IS THAT A LARVA??? ON BUGBLR???

🦋​ bread-and-butter-fly Follow

Relax it's my little brother. who's currently tricking ants into raising him

🕸️​ sneakyspidey Follow

​ What have you MANIACS done to my post

[pmpknsoup]

isat fake-posting but its just

🌌 melancholy-method-actor Follow

AITA for trapping myself in a prison of my own making?

I, (27, N-B) recently trapped myself and my family (25, M), (21, F) (45, F??) (10, N-B) in a seemingly endless timeloop brought on because i selfishly didnt want our time together to end. i had to die countless times to figure out what was trapping me in time, it sort of drove me insane, and i ended up seriously hurting my family's feelings. theyve all forgiven me, and all agree that while i was out of line, i was apparently "traumatized" and that it wasnt my fault that i lashed out at them.

i think theyre being too lenient with me, but i cant convince them!!

#aita #i mean im pretty sure i am #i just ... want an outside perspective #sorry for any bad grammar vaugardian isnt my first language

🎑 poterian-photography 🔁 from melancholy-method-actor

is it insensitive to say vaugardians are just. Like That?? LMAO

#sorry that happened op #i mean if this is real #im assuming it is because #after what happened to vaugarde #anythings possible

📝 daily-pierre-jauques-ernest 🔁 from poterian-photography

As someone who's half-Vaugardian, can confirm we're just Like That. I wouldn't be surprised if they managed to blame themselves, somehow

#not pierre #sorry for so many not pierre posts in a row but this unfreezing business is crazy and my dash is flooded #aita #nta #su speaks

🌫️ blacksmithingbaddie 🔁 from poterian-photography

Digging Vaugardians on what's clearly a vent post is crazy work actually!!!

#rb #tw self hatred talk #← (from ops post)

🖼️ the-meat-slicing-addict 🔁 from poterian-photography

yall isnt op one of the crabbing saviors

#WHY IS NO ONE COMMENTING ON THIS #I THINK THEYRE THE BLIND ONE

🌅 chronicallyfrozen 🔁 from the-meat-slicing-addict

"the blind one" ableism isnt cute...

#change its always tbmfiha series fans #get a personality your series sucks

🌌 melancholy-method-actor 🔁 from chronicallyfrozen

hwat

#i forgot abt this post #its been weeks can people stop reblogging this,

[shirecorn]

Many fish species make excellent pets, given proper enrichment and attention to water parameters. Acquire a sounding vessel from your local alchemist to see if there are any demons or angels haunting your water. You can add demons to angelic water to balance it back out and vise versa. Each species has an ideal water alignment, and after letting the entities fight it out and settle, you can safely add inhabitants to your pond or tank. I recommend a small school of neon tetras, with plenty of plants in which they can hide. You will enjoy watching this species school around, as they do quite well in captivity with the proper care.

There is no proper care for mermaids.

There is no proper tank size, or water parameters, or enrichment or plants or anything.

Mermaids cannot be kept as pets. But some people do keep them confined, and traded like livestock. This, of course, is slavery. Just as we are descended from apes and mermaids are descended from fish; we are both still people.

Of course there are those who disagree with this categorization; and there are those who do believe, but do not care.

The black market is a lucrative and deadly operation, crawling in the underbelly of most major human cities. They trade in mundane humans on occasion, but usually it is creatures and artifacts with some magical component: mermaids, fairies, even magic-touched humans such as werewolves, selkies, and ogres. The latter being very difficult to contain as a live specimen, so often their pelts are sold instead. These are marketed alongside unicorn horns, kelpie manes, basilisk fangs, and all else forbidden from trade by anyone with a heart.

Apologies.

These topics often distract me from the professionalism of my calling. Suffice it to say, if this series has inspired you to fantasize about pet mermaids, do not. Consider a mundane fish, and seek friendship with mermaids at your local outreach dock.

Mermaids rescued from market and the homes of decadent aristocrats have a long journey of healing ahead of them. Many cannot speak their own species' language, but pick up the language of their captors instead. For this reason, rehabilitation is a joint effort between humans and mermaids, before returning them fully to seas and waterways.

Success is difficult, but rewarding. Much moreso than any value they could possibly hold as "pets." Please be careful, and respectful of your fellow sentient creature.

Remember, you don't have to be human to be a person. And no person wants to be be a pet.

[ai-dream]

[reachartwork]

BREAKING: Donald Trump has been sighted on trailcam, fleeing on foot into the New Jersey Pine Barrens, last quoted as saying "Fuck you guys, I'm outta here.". Stay tuned for updates.

[joja-co-official]

Fun Fact!

Blue eyed people are just a massive advertising campaign created by Joja Co.

Share this with your blue eyed friend to let them know😅💙

[lolcatsaestheticdump]

[realpokemon]

My lucario laid an egg I'm naming the riolu after you

i am an equally bad role model to humans AND to pokémon. the good news is that your riolu is destined for a good handful of tumblr followers. the bad news is a much longer endeavor

[facts-i-just-made-up]

Any ao3 related facts?

Depends on which ao3 you mean. It can refer to-

Alfred Onemeppipipier III, inventor of the safety dagger

The Aspen to Ontario train by way of Oregon and Ozark City

The Apple Of Ornithological Orgasms, key to our understanding of frugivorous diets on bird orgasms, cloacabation and birdjaculation

Alfonse du OogleOrgleOogenmajer, inventor of the safety noose

AxExIxOxUxY3, a child of Elon Musk and Juliette (yes, the one from the play, don't ask)

Arturo Giorgio O.O.O. Martinez, author of the famous "Game of of of Scrabble" series.

An Archive of Our Own, a fanfiction site which should really be called a2o3 given the use of the "of" but not the "an" but this can't be used because a2o3 refers to antimony trioxide, coincidentally the same chemical used to vulcanize the rubber that most fanfic writers bounce their ideas off of

Anita Albertina Annaannafofannabananafannafofanna-memimomannaanna, inventor of the safety guillotine