#ur a crazy self hating bitch is what you are.

[snekdood]

its funny how the ppl who always imprinted the blonde girly pink rich girl bully stereotype on to me were... exactly that with different hair colors :/

[eijirousbestie]

since ur one of the realistic bakugou writers (just like what that anonie said) what do u think about: 1.him being jealous over his s/o. we always see those possessive or jelly bakugou writings, but i think it's kinda over exaggeration sometimes. 2.with affectionate s/o? like, i know things may be very awkward at the start of their relationship but what if his s/o suddenly has the urge to pepper kisses all over his face & hug him so tight? srry if it's stupid😭

Jealousy + Affection

Jealousy

——————————————-

He’d unsuspectingly pull them into his room when they aren’t looking, closing the door behind the two and standing tall with a displeased frown on his face. Jealousy is one of the feelings Katsuki rarely ever feels. And when he does, he absolutely hates it. It doesn’t make sense to him. He has everything he could ever need. An incredible power, insane strength, intellect like no other and a tongue as sharp as a knife. What the hell would he ever be jealous about? Or at least that’s what he would’ve thought before he got close enough to someone to call his own.

“We needa talk,” he’d grumble, brows knit together. “That ‘new friend’ of yours is pissing me off. I swear they only ever need you when I finally have you to myself.”

He’s realistic. He knows they’re not just gonna drop someone for him just because he doesn’t like them for unproved reasons, but that still doesn’t mean he won’t stop wishing they will. Until then, he’ll keep taking extra measures to make sure they can make up for lost time spent together. He’d spend extra time giving TLC he usually wouldn’t, feeling like he’d need to remind his partner where home really is.

In no way is he being overtly possessive or trying to tie his partner down. That’s just crazy as hell. He’s just worried about the third party’s intentions with his person, untrusting of what their motives may be or what their influence is on his partner. He knows they can handle their own but still it’s just a normal concern.

Then again, this is Katsuki we’re talking about so when he has his mind set on something it’s hard to change his mind about it, but he tried to be flexible for them. He tries. Jealousy is a bitch.

————————————————————

Affection

Having an affectionate partner isn’t always the easiest for Katsuki to deal with but that doesn’t mean he won’t try. Most likely this person would be one of the very few relationships he’s had throughout his life. Being career and goal focused for years on end left him with no time to think about all that lovey dovey bullshit other people his age would drown in. But everybody wants somebody, even if it’s just a friend.

And that’s how the two had started. Being friends with Katsuki is no easy feat. Having to put up with constant yelling, bickering and outrageously childish arguments, it wasn’t a cake walk. But it sure as hell was still fun just like any other friendship. The two had gotten along unsuspectingly well even though their personalities were near opposite. Him being reserved and self righteous; them being outwardly friendly and super connected to people.

In most cases Katsuki wouldn’t give someone like them the time of day, but of course they’re a rare case. His rare case. Katsuki could find solace in them knowing that whatever stupid shit he might spew could easily be returned with matched energy. The sense of mutual respect would then blossom them into a budding relationship, one where he could feel safe enough to fall with them completely.

At the beginning, yes it was a bit awkward. He wasn’t the skinship type at all and didn’t really understand why someone had to be glued to another person’s skin damn near 24/7. But after being slowly acclimated to hand holding, he starts to warm up to mutual touch. Having gotten used to being hugged up by them since the earlier stages in their friendship, of course he knows all their tells months into their new relationship.

Occasionally coming in for a hug, he’d accept, letting them do so as long as it wasn’t overly performative. There’s a happy balance in everything so he’d gotten to learn how to take it with stride after a while. Well, only if they hadn’t pestered him with too much physical contact in one day. One too many hugs? He’d put a palm to their face and lightly shove them away, not using any real strength to hurt them. Only enough to send the message that he’s all hugged out.

Of course, if he noticed he’d been neglecting their love language of touch, he’d concede, but in his own way. Loungin on the couch with them, he may glance down and notice their hands resting in their lap as they focus on the television. His gaze would drift up to the side of their face, watching their expression closely before taking their hand in his and putting it in his lap instead, lightly stroking the back of their hand with his thumb.

Katsuki can be a hardass sometimes. Most of the time. But he’s incredibly perceptive of people, especially those he holds close to his heart. So of course he’d do what he can to make them feel comfortable around him all while keeping himself comfortable and preserving his own boundaries.

————————————————————

[lotusmi]

SUCCESS STORY!!🤎🧸

tw//mental problems, abusive family, bullying, suicide attempt, manifest/void obsession

first of all i want to thank lotus because it helped me even when i was thinking about suicide❤️‍🩹

it's been years since I learned loa and I was having problems with the manifest. althought I have known loa for 2-3 years, i constantly reacted to 3D and for such reasons I could not manifest anything for 2-3 years. and when i first learned loa i was obsessed with void. I was hurting myself to enter void. like if you don't enter void today I will kill you. i was crazy because of void. at the same time, I was staying in the family environment that dragged me to death, and I was bullied at school . i was hated by people even though i did nothing. i tried to commit suicide many times, my family wouldn't let me go to the therapist. also, no one said anything to the bullying I saw. thats why I bullied myself for years in the same way. if I told anyone I was being bullied and asked for help, they would say it was probably my problem to my face💀💀 and towards the end of 2022, i seriously couldn't stand it anymore. i was constantly reading blogs [i think there is no blog i haven't read, lmao] and the last time i couldn't stand it, i tried suicide again, but i failed. later i wrote to lotus and she gave me a lot of advice (baby ily😩❤️) and i cried more than i have ever cried that night. the problem is that while people were already ruining me, the real problem was that i was ruining myself too. after that day, in the first week, i had so many problems in my manifest journey. but until 2023, i said to myself, "i don't want to live like this anymore. i deserve the life I want.” i made a promise. and every time I felt like quitting, i remembered my promise to myself. and now i have revised my whole life, i live in dubai🤭. if you're going to ask how i did this, i started to listen to my inner voice, i almost stopped entering tumblr. i stopped affirming and wrote down the things that i was gonna revise one by one, and added them to the notes app on my phone. i made a note at the bottom that I already have these in my life. when “what if I can't manifest the life I want?” if such thoughts came to my mind, i told myself that the creation was already finished. in this process, i focused only on myself and was developing my self concept. before I went to bed at night, i was constantly imagining the life I wanted and I was staying in that state and saying I already had the life I wanted, I didn't affirm anything extra. and even those who made life difficult for me started to apologize to me. (i manifested their karma life lol) anyway I don't want to talk more about those bitches but I want to mention this. please take a break. relax. stay away from things like void, loa for a few days. I noticed that some of you are obsessed with void on this blog. but i must say void is just a method. if i manifested the life i wanted when i was only 12-13 years old, you can do it too. take a break and do what feels good to you. love yourself. loa blogs can help you up to a point. they can't spare all their days for you. start taking responsibility. find manifest methods that work well for you. love yourself. meditate. i’ve talked a lot but I would like to add that, if someone tells you that you are the cause of the circumstances you are experiencing right now, that you created the conditions in which you live, please tell them to shut their fucking mouths. no such thing. i was blaming myself again, thinking what a disgusting monster i am just because this “you create ur reality” thingy. but the truth is that creation is already over. good luck!

MY FAV SUCCESS STORY TO EXIST!!!! 😭

I literally cried when this girl texted me saying she is living her dream life, I was so pround, I am pround 💗

Backstory, she first texted me 12/15/2022

She told me everything about her circumstances, they were really bad ones, and she was 12 at time and this made my heart so broken (she revised her age) since her parents were really toxic and disgusting ( I am not going to say much about her old story).

So I told her all about the toxic home I lived and how I manifested it away too (my success, my failures).

So, time passed and 01/feb I got this text!

I literally cried because I was so happy for herrrr 💗😭😭

"How she did it?"

She focused in her inner Self being the only reality and ignored all circumstances!

"and i would love to you to add those youtubers and blogs" insta: - kriston jackson youtube: - lana blakely tumblr: - @becomingthatgirl111 — other sources abt loa: - joe dispenza, edward art"

I literally cried so much and I am so happy for you my angel, look how you did it! You were 12 and revised your whole life! 💗💗💗

And that are people out there who don't believe that it is possible to manifest things. Look at this girl 💓

You did it amazing love, I am so pround of you. You are deserving of all the best things in the world. I wish you all the fun in life. Thank you sm for sending me this, I feel so appreciated that I had helped you, but who did all of this was YOU! 💗💗💗

✉️You all, everything is possible!

[newtkive]

pixels [newt x reader - modern text au]

ch. 4 - agoraphobia and burger king on 5th street

summary: a personal experience provides a way for newt to connect to y/n.

warnings: strong language, mental health talk, depression, medication (its my literal prescription i mention oops this is like a self insert fr), mutual pining, none really.

➥ m.list

--

THE GLADE

[ 10:52 am ]

y/n: it’s official yall

drugs saved my life

tommy: huh??

minho: same

newt: wow, i’ve never seen your name on my screen before 12 pm

y/n: shut the hell up bitch

newt: ouch, touchy

minho: woah

touchy 👀

are yallll..?

y/n: you’re sick

tommy: are we going to ignore the drugs statement??

like hello are u ok ??

newt: you’re annoying minho

minho: yea <3 😊

notice how they didn’t say no

y/n: you guys just don’t understand how a girl like me needs beauty sleep..

and no we aren’t

gally: all that beauty sleep and ur still walking around with that mug.. yikes.

y/n: 😑

i hate you i haete you i dhateoyifu

minho: great she’s having a fit

y/n: no one cares about me

and you think i’m ugly

this is so sick

and you don’t even care that i’m on drugs

☹️😭😭😭😭 done.

newt: no one said that love

gally that was rude

minho: BRUHHHHH

here she goes

tommy: I CAREE????????

DO I NEED TO COMEGET YOU????

y/n: yes 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

before i do something crazy 😭😭💣

minho: THE BOMB IS WILD

tommy: stay where you are

i have your location

newt: uhhh

y/n: pause what

minho: tommy why would you admit to that

tommy: im On my way! what’s the issue

sorry autocorrect

y/n: WHY DO YOU HAVE MY LOCATION????

gally: can you guys shut the fuck up

minho: the drama queen is here 😍

gally: stop

alby: I have it on Life360, I imagine Thomas does as well. In fact I have all of your locations.

y/n: oh

i forgot about that app..

minho: i didn’t. i get a notif that newt’s phone is at 5% all the goddamn time

even tho he said he deleted it

newt: just turn it off then

i redownloaded it don't track my app intake

minho: no it makes me feel less lonely

y/n: awwwww

idk how you do that newt

newt: do what?

y/n: not charge your phone

if my phone gets below like 15% then the monsters will get me

tommy: omg me tooo 🥹

newt: i was about to say you sound like tommy.

tommy: don’t say that!

she’s on drugs i don’t want to sound like an addict 😔

newt: she isn’t on drugs thomas

tommy: she literally said she is newt :/

5 mins and i’m there y/n

y/n: are you actually fr

thomas..

we live very far away sweetie

newt: i mean

if you were in trouble you don’t think we’d come get you?

tommy: ^^

but life360 says you’re at the burger king on 5th

minho: no that’s me LOOOL

y/n: NEWTTT ☹️☹️☹️☹️☹️

tommy: wtf

i’m the one who’s coming to get u

why does he get the credit

minho: no tommy you’re coming to get me

tommy: oh yippee i get to see my friend 🤗

newt: ewwwwww

y/n: EWWWWW

tommy: OH STOP IT

y/n: why burger king of all places min

minho: why drugs of all things y/n

gally: she’s not doing drugs are you guys fuckin insane

y/n: yes i am

it’s 10 mg of fluoxetine 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

ONCE A DAY!!!!!!

IM ADDICTED

newt: no you aren’t, 10 mg is the smallest dose

minho: told y’all she was on drugs

y/n: ???????

minho: over the year

you’re too hyper to not be on some crack shit

tommy: oh stop that’s not nice.

newt: it’s not drugs like that minho stop.

tommy: uhoh he brought out the . at the end

y/n: it’s just for anxiety cuz i can’t leave the house without going into a breakdown

minho: she got acrophobia

told y’all she was mental

newt: what the fuck are you talking about

tommy: oh i know that word

fear of spiders 🕷️

minho: wtf no

fear of outside

y/n: i’m not afraid of outside

newt: that’s agoraphobia you fucking dumbass

y/n: 😍

i did NOT mean to send that lol oops

newt: ??

oh, okay

minho: when he’s a know it all 😍

when she’s agoraphobic 😍

y/n: when he’s at burger king on 5th because he has no food in his fridge and can only afford a $1.99 whopper with the coupons from the newspaper 😍😍😍😍

minho: 😒😑

newt: LMFAOOOO

GOOD THAT

minho: british people be so annoying

saying shit like gormless minger and good that be sooo real rn

newt: i have never said gormless minger in my whole 26 years of life.

y/n: you just did bro

newt: call me bro again

y/n: bro

brosive

brother

stepbro

minho: laughed until i saw the last msg :/

newt: 😑

y/n: ok youre the perverts

minho: cant you take your prozac and turn back to normal now

y/n: so you DO know what it is..

gally: wym 'back to normal' like there was smth before this??

y/n: real i been like this for life

tommy: i got whopper and two large fries and mozzarella sticks

newt: wow

y/n: wow just call him a fatass newt.

newt: i would never, stop

y/n: 2 large fries is kinda crazy tho

tommy: i have to get enough to share with my friend

minho

gally: surprised you have friends

tommy: yeah you are not one.

gally: RUDE?

y/n: WELL LMFAO

minho: i literally already ate also gally ur not my friend either

newt: same

alby: same

gally: well why tf am i in here

y/n: well you're my friend!

gally: great.

y/n: not with that attitude..

tommy: y/n you're ok though right??

y/n: yes tommy im fine sweetie

go eat your food

tommy: okay i wish you could share these fries with me

y/n: me too :(

minho: i don't

big back would eat em all

y/n: i actually hate you

__

newt

[ 11:45 am ]

newt: hey

y/n: hiii :D whats up??

newt: idk why but this feels like secretly texting you across the room at a party

y/n: actually tho

picture me giving u a look from across the room

newt: you would blow our cover immediately

i just wanted to let you know if you needed any like,, advice or something with your new medicine i'm here for you. i take the same stuff on top of lexapro

y/n: oh really?

newt: yeah i do

y/n: newt :( thank you

i am a bit nervous to start it tbh

newt: i understand, i was too

but hopefully it'll change things for the better

y/n: i hope so

i didn't realize you dealt with anxiety n stuff

newt: more than you know

you aren't the only one and you aren't alone w it

y/n: you're sweet newt, thank you

newt: don't mention it :))

sorry the smiley was creepy

y/n: lmao no i like it

if you need to talk or anything too i’m always here

newt: yeah?

y/n: of course ): you’re my pookie

newt: one day you gotta let go of that word lmao

y/n: but you love it tho

newt: you tell yourself that

actually are you free rn?

y/n: yeah! i’m just about home what’s up?

newt: i’m bored so pick up the phone

y/n: NEWT LMAO

ok fine 😒

[lightvixxen]

Eddie munson x insecure!bestfriend!reader

A/n:This is purely self-indulgent bc I needed some comfort lolz, also major vent post and its kinda personal bc this is actual stuff from my own vents lol, but I just needed to write Eddie comfort and ik there’s some plus sized ppl who feel the same<3

Warnings: degrading language(not the fun kind), insecurity, reader calls themselves names in their diary, negative self-talk,reader willing gets into a toxic arrangement, fluff…so much fluff, best friends to lovers, small angst but its hurt/comfort, small mentions of violence, Eddie just wants to harm the ppl that hurt you.

Summary: Eddie reads ur diary and need to show just how fucking wrong u are abt yourself.

Eddie had been in your room countless times, though this time, he was on a fucking mission. He had managed to convince you to go downstairs alone to grab some drinks, and he prayed it kept you occupied long enough for him to snoop.

You had been down the past few days and he needed to know why, unfortunately for him, you kept your mouth shut on your feelings, opting to change the subject every time he asked. Luckily for him though, you wrote down everything in a small blue notebook. Eddie grabbed the notebook out of its hiding place, flipping through its pages, he knew this was an invasion of privacy but damn it he was worried, sue him.

He stopped, finally coming to the most recent page, which had everything he needed to know.

September 19, 1987.

So, I went back to him…and I know what your thinking “why would you go back to someone who uses you?!”

Eddie already knew who and what you were talking about, had spent countless nights staying up with you as you sobbed into his shoulder about the boy who would never return your feelings and played you consistently. And spent countless nights fighting the urge to grab a fucking bat to go kill the son of a bitch. But he reads on.

Well, I’ll tell you, it’s because its what I think I deserve. I’ve kinda accepted my fate to the “fuckable but not datable” Role of my life. After all no one wants a fat ugly whore hanging off their arm.

God- Eddie wanted to both punch and hug you, you were absolutely perfect and beautiful, words couldn’t describe how much he wanted you. How much he wanted you hanging off his arm, contrary to your belief- you weren’t ugly, sure you were bigger than all the other girls, but that just meant more to love! He wanted to worship every part of your body. To show you off, show all the fuckers who said those nasty things to you what they were missing. And for fucks sake, you saw yourself as a whore?! You barely slept with anyone, and the people you did sleep with you had known for years!

I just- I just want someone to actually care, want someone to tell me they love me and mean it.

Eddie loved you, He loved you so fucking much even he, himself couldn’t believe it. He looked at you with so much adoration and love it was unbelievable how oblivious you were to him.

Nobody wants a nerd, no one wants a plus sized- or well fat, Plus size is only for the pretty ones, that of which I am not. Also no one wants baggage, or someone who’s clingy if they say they do they’re lying. Or i would have someone, pretty sure no one in this school would touch me with a 10ft pole. Lol jealous of the people who are wanted.

The entry ends and Eddie wants to cry, he hated the fact you talked about yourself like that. He wanted everything about you, he was fucking crazy over you. He wished he could make you see yourself the way he saw you. Because fuck- you were a goddess to him. He worships the fucking ground you walk on. He wanted to take you out on sappy dates, and treat you the way you deserve to be treated. Not the way you’ve been treated by your exes, he hated how they treated you like a fucking toy.

Eddie heard your heavy footsteps bounding up the stairs, he didn’t bother putting your diary away. He was going to shoot his fucking shot because damn it if that’s how you’ve been feeling he wanted to show you how fucking wrong you were.

“Okay I finally got- Eds…what the fuck?!” You almost dropped the two cans, seeing your best friend with your diary. It’s obvious he had read it, so fucking obvious in the way he was staring at you.

Eddie didn’t say anything as he gently closed the notebook. Didn’t say anything as he slowly got up from your bed. You thought he was going to run out, tell you everything you had thought was true, that this was the end to your friendship with Eddie. Instead, he crossed the room, walking towards you and before you knew it he was pulling you into a bone crushing hug.

“E-Eddie?!” You squeaked, arms hanging loosely at your sides. “God- your so fucking stupid you know that?! You talk so fucking negatively about yourself, while your oblivious to the way I look at you!” You were stunned, you couldn’t tell if he was comforting you or not.

But he continued, “you’re so fucking beautiful, and pretty and so fucking amazing, I want you to be the one hanging off my arm. Fuck- sweetheart I want everything about you.” Your face fell, more than it already could. You had heard that phrase so many times, and it only landed you being stranded in your sheets.

“Eddie- c’mon don’t play like that.” You murmured, even with the way he was hugging you, you couldn’t believe someone could ever want you outside of sex. “I’m not fucking playing!” He pulled back from you, a firm grip on your shoulders, he wanted to shake you until you realized he was telling the truth. “Sweetheart, I love you genuinely, every time- every single fucking time, you mention someone hurt you, or someone used you. I’ve had to fight the urge to kill a motherfucker for making you think like that.”

Tears slowly well up in your eyes. You knew Eddie, he didn’t joke about that kind of shit. Not after what happened last year. “Sweetheart-“ Eddie wiped your tears, “you don’t know how much I love you, I worship the fucking ground you walk on, I’ve written stupid love songs about how much I want you.” His eyes are locked on yours, letting you know just how serious he is about this. “You literally consume my every thought, all I think about is what your doing, what you feel, The way you laugh, the way you smile-“ Eddie hugged you once again. “God if I knew that’s what you were feeling I would’ve told you this ages ago, but…I’m absolutely crazy about you.”

And with that he kissed you, it was slow, passionate, letting you know just how much he meant every word. Every-time you tried to make it heated, tried to deepen the kiss he would pull away. He wasn’t gonna let your stupid insecurities and thoughts ruin the image you have of him.

[stupd000]

My typed reaction of Vegas BA bc everyone’s asleep

I love the guy who checks us in

Oh um don’t call me pet

Ermmmmm

Okay don’t like it so far

aw shucks i missed you too boo

no i will not come closer

ew no go away

oh nvm ig we are

wait so are we the dog or is he

okay this is getting boring

can we fuck now

oh wait nvm this is hot

oh WE’RE the puppy

that’s um

okay

is he calling me special

no i’m not ready to play VEGA.

i have a feeling we’re not alone

or we are

idk

okay we got some vouyers

that’s erm

okay

don’t call me pet

weirdo

excitement? no honey i’m scared

yes fear

ok can we fuck now

damn he talks a lot

stop echoing

oh don’t call me pup

oh this is some like

kinky kinky shit

how big is Vega

just in general cuz i thought he was like

6,1 and scrawny

um no my breath is oxygen not yours

this is definitely um

yeah

correct circumstances?

wardrobe?? bitch what is this Narnia

DONT CALL ME A PUPPY THATS WEIRD

i’m kink shaming

I am not getting on all fours what the fuck

oh nvm ig we are

this is uncomfortable

TAIL????

this is some furry shit

UM ..!

NO I WILL NOT CRAWL

WHATTTTTT

ASS?

SLUT???

this would be hot if i wasn’t a fucking dog

don’t shush me bitch

are we still on all fours

that’s mad embarrassing

i am not yours

weirdo

I’d rather you not take care of me

this is very um

interesting!!

Do we have dignity

STOP CALLING ME PUPPY YOU FURRY

do we have any pride at all like oh my god

GRINDING???

Don’t slut shame me bitch

arching????????

oh my god.

CUM HUNGRY LITTLE BITCH????

if he says puppy one more time i’m killing myself

if he puts a fucking collar on me i’ll jump

stop

STOPPP

Dog tag is crazy

“property of vega” NO.

Stop vega this is not a joke

DO WE HAVE NO SENSE OF DIGNITY

OH MY GODDDD

PROUD??? I AM NOT PROUD

OWNER???

I’m jumping off a ledge

MY HOLE?? WHICH ONE I HAVE LIKE 3

Okay stop slut shaming me Vega

ROLL OVER???

i’m insanely uncomfortable

by the way guys i made chicken alfredo today

Anyway

i hate his fucking tone

don’t take that attitude w me bitch

DO NAWTTT CALL ME A WHORE EVER AGAIN.

oh wait he called me pretty nvm

this is insane

it’s 2:30 am i cannot handle this

okay so we archin

PUT WHAT IN

WHAT IS GOING IN

this is strange

CALLING UR DICK A TREAT IS WILDDD

oh my god no

stop.

A TAIL???

NO

NO NO NO NO

NO

NO

no wait cuz there was this one kid who wore a butt plug tail to school it was crazy bc a guy pulled it out

anyway

This is some furry shit

not that there’s anything wrong w that live ur truth

STRETCHING???

the plug is insane

stop

i’m actually sobbing this is NOT OKAY.

what position are they in im so confused

SHAKE WHAT ASS

UMMMMMMMMM

this is peculiar

Vega is a furry

i hate this

i hate this sm

I STILL HAVE 10 MINS LEFT

LORD SAVE ME

okay no need to take that tone Vega😒

bitch we can’t breathe wtf

no i wont whine around that tootsie roll u call a dick

AHHH THE NOISESSS

okay can u not choke me

don’t call me a slut you cunt

oh my god hurry up vega

ew

I don’t love anything about this

this is insane

NOT A PERSON????

RUDEEEEEEEE

okay adjective king

ew don’t call me that

i am not licking the floor sir

i am not licking your boot either

lick your own fucking boot

this is actually pissing me off he’s annoying

are we almost done

Do we have no sense of shame

like at all

second hand embarrassment

okay are we done

no? okay

ew don’t call ur self master

that’s not..

okay

um

the growling is insane

damn right i’m divine

ew don’t call the that

not the baby voice

stop this madness

what do you want from me WHAT DO U WANNTTTT

okay are we done

TWITCHING?????? INSANE.

That was horrible

[thedarkonesposts]

Obligatory omega Kylar posting…. We r also talking abt the other school love interests in abo terms cause… I neglect anyone who isn’t Kylar 😐

Kywar (omega)

Everyone can tell he’s an omega. He gets made fun of for it because of course the grimy weird kid also has to be an omega

Kylar might be an omega but he has the violent possessiveness of an alpha. He’s also mad delusional and thinks he’s secretly an alpha despite being quite breedable and tiny. Obviously he isn’t and instantly gets submissive the second an alpha is actually around.

He’s unintentionally slutty, he has no ability to control his impulses- which leads to being starry eyed and needy around every single alpha before he’s mated. He’s just a little desperate to have a mate honestly.

Cute, he’s cute.

Even more of a hopeless romantic than usual, someone needs to claim and knot him before he whimpers at the wrong person. He’s incredibly shy but his urge for romance weighs out enough that he’ll stalk alphas and stare up at them w his heavy breathing the second they’re close.

Obsessed w having pups. Does not shut up abt it, thinks he’d have the cutest babies despite hating how he looks.

Being forcefully claimed wouldn’t phase him, he’d be happy someone wants him that much tbh.

Biter. Like regular Kylar he shows love in weirdly violent ways- biting excessively is definitely one of them. Once he gets a mate it’s over, they’re going to be covered head to thigh in bite marks and hickeys so everyone knows.

Gets separation anxiety from his mate, even if it’s just for a few hours he can barely handle being away.

The master of nest making and nesting. Dude makes the coziest nests and has the best naps there. Shits built with care and love.

Runt

His omega scent works hard against his lack of showers. He smells cinnamony. Christmassy almost. Just a nice mix of spice.

Sydney (beta)

Alluring to literally anyone, alphas, betas, omegas. Everyone wants him and thinks he’s a gorgeous and perfect mate

People argue abt what he is. They think he’s too pretty and kind to be a beta or alpha but too headstrong and self assured to be an omega. He’s also strong enough people doubt it. They’d probably be shocked to find out he’s just a beta

Doesn’t understand alpha or omega instincts and has a giggle abt how desperate and crazy they seem,,,But still wants a mate and hopes being a beta won’t ruin his chances

Grew up with an omega best friend so he’s kind of picked up on cozy omega activities like nesting and scenting. He’d definitely do them with a partner whenever he got one.

Prefers omegas, despite his masochistic tendencies he doesn’t like how alphas act, it annoys him.

Literally so pretty.

Whitney (alpha)

Annoying about it, everyone knows he’s an alpha because he’s the most stereotypical asshole alpha possible.

Claims he doesn’t want a mate and doesn’t care about having one yet absolutely does.

Has tried forcefully mating several ppl just for it to reject and him to have a bitch fit over it

Would be weirdly possessive once mated, definitely also a biter. He wouldn’t let his mate go out without being bitten and scratched to hell.

Smells nice, pine maybe.

Doesn’t want pups even once mated

Robin (omega? Beta?)

Could either go omega or beta, he’d still be smaller and submissive regardless but I think he’d suit being a beta more. His submissiveness is more earned than being inherent.

He isn’t like… pathetically needy. He’s dependent and loves to cuddle but it isn’t excessive.

No matter what he is he’s getting bullied for being an omega so he might as well just be one.

Neutral on pups, he feels like he’s too young to worry about that stuff.

Bonus Eden (alpha obviously)

Did you guys know Eden and Kylar would be the perfect couple? Yeah I’m making a section for eden just to shove this down ur throats again :)!!!!

Undoubtedly an alpha, just look at him. He’s aggressive, primal, big. The mate literally any omega would want. (ESP Kylar, Kylar would be on his knees begging for a chance if they met)

Violently possessive but also very protective and loving as a mate.

Not above forcefully mating someone, and doing it over and over until it doesn’t reject

He wants pups. Badly. The satisfaction of breeding his mate would be the best feeling in the world. He’d also be more than happy to trap them at home to keep them safe during pregnancy. He’d do literally everything for them- but still ask to be bathed and fed if they could manage it.

Smells like a campfire, cozy.

If only there was some desperate, loyal, needy omega who also desperately wanted pups. That would be crazy. If only someone else could match the same level of possessiveness and delusion it takes to kidnap someone and forcefully mate them….

[nightcolorz]

🌍 and 🔍 obviously for Armand

Fuck yes tysm anon looooove this animal!!!! "Obviously for Armand" is killing me like yes so true he is my brand

🔎: something about the modern era not referenced in the books that you think [insert character] would find upsetting or confusing + why?

This almost feels too obvious but the invasion of Ukraine I imagine would be pretty triggering and upsetting for Armand. For pretty self explanatory grew up in Kiev under invasion slash power of Ghengis Khan subsequent kidnapping and selling trauma.

On a less serious note I think Armand would find combat video games rlly confusing lmao. Ik this is probably a hot take but I have reasoning ! In devil's minion Armand describes to Daniel how he doesn't understand war or violence between men cuz violence to him isn't something he would ever choose, it's not exciting to him and it doesnt like call to him the way he imagines it does to other ppl, he is only so violent because he was born into violence raised to become used to pain and as a vampire violence is inherent + necessary.

So like I imagine if he found out about first person shooters killing games etc he wouldn't understand why they exist 😭 I think he'd really enjoy the technological and mechanic aspects that go into a game and find them really appealing for that reason (I could def see Armand having a gamer phase) but conceptually killing games would confuse him. I imagine while crushing Daniel in call of duty Armand's questioning him the whole time over why it is so overwhelmingly common for mortals to design experiences were they can fantsize about taking life while Daniel is just like oh my god Armand its not that deep ur distracting me 😭

🌍: if [insert character] were human and so was everyone else, what would their life be like? for example: what would their career be? where would they live? what about their relationship to [insert character]?

Oooo don't u dare activate human au brain (excitement). I love human aus cuz it strips away any supernatural justification for the characters being so fucked up and instantly reduces them to guys who r just like that it's so funny.

I could see Armand as an interior designer, smth sort of formulaic but still artistic. Interior design calls to me for him cuz of his passion for designing his loved ones elaborately lavish living spaces as a form of love language (trinity gate, night island). Obvs I have a human au and my Armand live's in New York, so I'm gonna go with that. Interior designer living in New York Lmao whose in the worst ever pseudo polycule with his old friend (derogatory) Lestat, Lestat's husband Armands ex husband (non literal) slash current boyfriend Louis and his bitch he keeps on a leash and does kink with in non consenting public spaces Daniel.

It feels so silly saying this cuz my fic is literally a social media au but I think that in a general human au Armand would not use social media like he'd have accounts and use the Internet but I can not see him blogging tweeting tiktoking etc. having a social media presence requires a certain level of gratification and enjoyment with sharing urself with others and being a public figure that army doesnt have lmao he hates to be perceived + consumed and thats what being online is all about ❤️

Anyways relationship wise I think Daniel is the most interesting to talk about in a human au cuz there relationship is so centrally vampiric like the whole conflict and crazy devotion comes from that, and in my heart and soul a human devil's minion has the same insanity that is justified by Daniel just being very mentally ill and Armand just being very into bdsm and blood play role play shit, love wins. Kidding they r both very mentally ill, I imagine the vampire conflict would translate into daniel being crazy obsessed with Armand and desperately longing for a deeper emotional intimacy and commitment, maybe even marriage, and armand keeps pushing him away cuz for trauma reasons he likes to keep ppl at arms length, so they r just doing bdsm shit but they r in love and army doesn't know what to do with that cuz the vulnerability of being emotionally intimate is scarier then physical esp when u have the power in the sexual dynamic. also Daniel alcoholism plus Armand every disorder and trauma is a formula for big blow out arguments all the time. Maybe they get healthy one day and adopt some fuck ass kid or two (Benji and sybelle wink wink)

Human au Marius wise makes me shudder cuz the most canon accurate stand in would be Marius adopts Armand when he's a kid or takes him in, fosters him, etc which is pretty hashtag disturbing 😭 but if I were to write a human au that's not millennia gate (my fic) that's what I'd do 😊

Armands history with Lestat and Louis I imagine would be pretty similar to canon just to a smaller less vampiric scale cuz queer ppl r just like that they r all exes they r all dating and having casual sex and marrying. I would elaborate more on this but I would just be semi spoiling my plans for my fic Lmao so ig stay tuned

Anyways love u for this anon I love Armand love that animal he is my fav ever shrieks and explodes

[comebackali]

my biggest beef with ahsoka (the character, not the hideouso show) is that her mere existence asks me to retcon something i have internalized as fundamental gospel truth, that is: the jedi apprentice series, padawans being 12 & younger, the preexisting canon that younglings get shipped off to the agricorps if they don't get chosen as a padawan by age 13 (which is CRAZY, but okay).

and in The Gospel According to Allie it goes JEDI APPRENTICE >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> LITERALLY EVERYTHING ELSE. including all the movies put together. like there is something SO UNIQUE and special about the book series you are obsessed with when you are still in the single digits. moreso than any movie you may watch on repeat (tpm). because unlike a movie, even if you watch it everyday, a book goes with you EVERYWHERE. this bitch your CONSTANT COMPANION. it's what you're reading on the playground and in the lunch line and secretly under the desk when ur supposed to be doing math worksheets and to and from the walk to school. so ahsoka showing up with her 14 year ass self being like, "maybe i am (too young to be a padawan), but master YODA thinks i'm not." gurl WHAT??? i simply cannot. you're asking me to choose between That Which Createth Me and someone who what?? some random girl?? who by virtue of merely existing retcons That Which Is Most Dear. of course i hate her. i hate her and she's done nothing. it's been 15+ years and i've NEVER been able to get over this.

[litcrazh]

mlb if there was tiktok would basically be:

*MY AU OBVI*

the usernames

@ chatnoirfanpage- chat

@ ladybugoffical- lb

@ adrienagreste- adriens main acc

@ dj.nino- ninos main acc

@ theladyblog- lasyblog acx

@ alyalb- alya main acc

@ maridc- mari main account

@ lbmarryme- adrien secret

@ childishgamnino- nino secret acc- guys i’m really proud of that one

@ lbmarryme2- alya secret

@ maribread- marinette

there’s more but pretty self explanatory

this is post reveal pre relationship

*edit of chat being hot*

1.4 mil likes

102k comments

@ chatnoirfanpage : omg wow he’s so hot @ ladybugoffical you should definitely see this and marry him and have his kids

|—- @ ladybugoffical : omg chat get off your phone your late for patrol

@ maridc: GAWD DAYUM

|— @ maridc: shit wrong acc

|— @ maribae129: SHE HAS ANOTHER ONE

@ maribread: GAWDDDD DAYYUMM

|- @ marrymelb: offer still stands

|- @ maribread: who are you🤨

|- @ marrymelb: ur future bf ;)

|- @ marrymelb2: GUYS NOT IN A PUBLIC COMMENT SECTION😭😭

*adrien posts a thirst trap*

1.2 mil likes

204k comments

@ maridc: hi agresty zesty😉😉😉😉

|_@ adrienagreste: hi marbar 😏😏😏😏

|-@ adrienettelover: PROOF

@ childishgamnino: hot sexy hmu bbg😍

|- @ marrymelb: made it just for u bbg 😘

@ alyalb: cringe

|- @ adrienagreste: i do not like you.

@ maribread : BAIDKFOAMWIDOCMG

|-@ maribread: sorry my keys slipped

|-@ maribread: HANDS DIPPED

|-@ maribread: FUCK HANDS SLIPPED

|—- @ lbmarryme2: girl…

|—-@ childishgamnino: girl…

|- @ lbmarryme: dipped to where😏😏😏

|- @ lbmarryme2: dawg…

|- @ childishgamnino: dawg…

*mari posts a thirst trap*

883k likes

102k comments

@ adrienagreste: oh

|- @ adrienagreste: im

|- @lbmarryme: wait

|- @ lbmarryme: holy

|- @childishgamnino: DAWG HAD TO GRAB A WHOLE NEW ACCOUNT😭😭

@ chatnoirfanpage: hi marinette dupain cheng im a superhero

|- @ adrienagreste: hi marinette dupain cheng IM a famous model

|- @ chatnoirfanpage: shut up ur ugly and ur hair is fake

|- @ alyalb: BAHA

@ lukacouffine: you look pretty marinette!!

|- @ chatnoirfanpage: shut up blueberry

|- @ adrienagreste: #ihatelukacouffine

|- @lbmarryme: shut up i bring a guitar to a party, sound pretty farty, your hair is fake blue, looks like poo, fake earring in one ear, puke whenever i’m near

|- @ childishgamnino: DUDE WAS SO MAD HE STARTED RHYMING 😭😭

|- @ marrymelb2: SUNNY WAS DROPPING BARS 🔥🔥

|- @ lukacouffine: 1) I HAVE A FUCKING GIRLFRIEND 2)AT LEAST I SAID SOMETHING PUSSY 3) chat noir ur fr a bitch🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄

|-@ chatnoirfanpage: who’s chat noir 🤨🤨

@ alyalb: HOTTIE WOW THATS MY BEST FRIEND

@ alyalb: @dj.nino im leaving u for mari❤️

|- @ dj.nino: not if i leave first babe❤️❤️

|- @ alyalb: u love me too much to leave me ❤️

|- @ dj.nino: ugh u caught me 👐

|- @ adrienagreste: @ maridc how do they make everything into flirting

|- @ maridc: couldnt tell ya!

quick little switch to twitter

#ihatelukacouffine is trending on twitter

@ adrienagreste: guys i don’t hate @lukacouffine and yes my father did make me say this and yes me and luka are now married

|- @lukacouffine: it’s ok babe 😘

|- @ adrienagreste: thanks blue blue bear 💙💙

|- @ dj.nino: did i just become the other women?????

|- @ alyalb: @ maridc @ kagamifence HELLO???

|- @ kagamifence: I do not comprehend nor understand this joke of “bromance”. Luka is still my boyfriend, yes?

|- @ lukacouffine: yes my muse

@ maridc: adrien babe what is this

|— @ adrienagreste: public statement bug🫡

|—- @ lukacouffine: u hate me cause u ain’t me 🤘

|- @ maridc: LUKA BAHAHA

ok back to tik tok

*lila posts a sad attempt of a thirst trap but it doesn’t work bc she’s ugly and she tags adrien* 204k likes

102k comments

@ marrymelb: no chance adrien wanted to be tagged

|—- @ xoxolilarossi: your literally a private acc with 8 followers. you’re just jealous of me and adriens relationship

|— @ marrymelb2: BHAHAH IM PISSING MYSELF

|- @ marrymelb: nah wtf is this shit

@ alyalb: love thé confidence girly!!

|- @ marrymelb: confidence nah that’s crazy😭

|- @ xoxolilarossi: thanks als💕💕🥹🥹 you know ever since i got both my eyes removed and plugged back in i’ve been so insecure about my face

|—@ tomfoolery: why did u get ur eyes out

|- @ lbmarryme2: if i looked like u i would be insecure too babe

🐞🐈🦊🐢

sunny: ALYA

als: BAHHA

sunny: SHE FUCKING BLOCKED ME

als: NO WAY

jay z: wait what happened?? i was in the studio

sunny: look at l***a’s post

jay z: EW

als: WE ARE SO MEAN I LOVE IT

sunny: we aren’t mean we are just mean to l***a!! 😁

sunny: can mari respond

sunny: my lady

sunny: tikki spots on

als: did u think that would summon her💀

sunny: …

sunny: no

jay z: he def did

bugapoo: hi wtf did l***a post

sunny: her ugly ass

als: ADRIEN AGRESTE

bugapoo: HOW DID U GET BLOCKED

sunny: *ss of the comments from his priv acc*

bugapoo: NAHHN😭😭

sunny: mari come over

bugapoo: ok

jay z: no booty calls in the group chat❌❌

sunny: NO I MEAN COME OVER TO MAKE A TIKTOK OF US BEING TOGETHER TO MAKE HER LOOK LIKE A DUMBASS

als: adrien shut up that’s so funny

sunny: I KNOW

jay z: marinette can u send hw answers btw

jay z: mari

jay z: I DONT WANT TO HEAR ANY LB EXCUSES EITHER THERE WAS NOTHING THIS WEEK

jay z: marriiii PLS HELP A BROTHA OUT

sunny: i left it at home

als: adrien what??

sunny: *photo of mari and adrien in his room, both sporting goofy lovesick burns and thumbs up*

jay z: 😭😭

als: BAHAH

[yuukei-yikes]

Okay okay okay I have a very specific itch to hear about Mekakushi Dan sensory needs and bc you're the first person I can think of who has drawn them stimming I thought your askbox was the perfect place to launch myself. If you have thoughts here pls feed me. Bonus points for Takane's sensory needs + challenges before becoming a computer program and post str bc I do think her needs would be different than they were before?? I think not having a body for 2 years would do that to you

HI ok i dont have a lot of headcanons in general its mostly haruka and takane and mostly takane. i think haruka is the one ive drawn stimming the most Like i just think that guy would flap his little hands around yknow.

so im sorry i dont have hcs for the whole mekadan. IF UR INTERESTED IN A PARTICULAR MEKADAN GUY u can ask me and I'll come up with something >:3 it just feels overwhelming to think of it all at once. and also u said takane and you know damn well im abt to talk for 1 million hours

ok. takane❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️ sorry this isn't sensory needs but girl.. takanes Gamer Secret being found out... idk man it's like. this bitch had been MASKING‼️‼️‼️

even in hs days i think takane feels weird about Touching with her hands. she doesn't have the cartoonishly large sleeves she has as ene, but i think she pulls down her sleeves over her hands like in this specific manga panel i indeed have in speed dial

i wish it appeared more often bc its a cute shoutout to ene later on and also WOOO THIS BITCH HAS SENSORY ISSUES!!! i made a comic abt it once but haruka designing actor with the bigass sleeves because he observed that takane pulls down her sleeves. *bite bite bite bite bite* also this panel has always been a fave of mine bc of autism creature takane and also bc the desk is like. at haruka's chest and he looks like he's sitting on the ground

i also think its very funny to imagine takane kicking ass in games while holding the controller with her sleeves over it and everyone's like ?????girl what. ofc she probably has specific textures she hates and all that, takane doesnt feel weird about touching as a whole.

in several instances of yuukei yesterday haruka and takane casually touch each other and while thats obviously cuz they're close friends, a lot of close friends dont act that way or arent comfortable with touch yknow!! in fact takanes the one to start most physical interactions with him. i could be crazy enough to go and check but im gonna trust my memory. and bc i love art where ene is jumping on shintaro and stuff i like to think takane is Actually touchy with ppl she trusts. also she doesnt register personal space sometimes, and ends up standing too close without noticing until someone points it out. i guess this is a bit contrary to a typical takane interpretation (UR STANDING TOO CLOSE DUMBASS🙄🙄🙄🙄 tsundere moment) but i think it's a fun spin to it. i think kenjirou is the one to most point it out like Girl step BACK ur all in my zone and she's like UGH WHATEVER and haruka also notices but never rly says anything. he probably loves it lol haruka's so overdue physical connection he loves that takane doesn't mind touching him or being close to him. also since they have a big height difference its not like she's all up on his face. i think takane starts letting go more once her ene secret's out and stops caring so much but it sorta comes back when ayano and shintaro join the group. i think shintaro especially would point out UGH WHY ARE YOU STANDING SO CLOSE TO ME or even question why she's so close to haruka or ayano. haruka and ayano are all like NOOO DONT WORRY I DONT MIND but takanes already mortified and is more self aware

another one. takane with her big old headphones. yeah yeah uses them disconnected to get haruka's attention Whatever she also uses them bc she prefers hearing stuff muffled instead of hearing it directly 👍 when she gets overwhelmed she puts those things on with the music to the max and just logs out for a min

OH also this is a canon one😼😼😼 her leg bouncy thing. shintaro points it out in the seventh novel that takane is bouncing her leg and says it's a nervous habit he never noticed on her but TO ME. SHE DOES THAT❤️ takane has huge leg bouncer energy i bet she makes the whole table shake and everyone asks her to quit it and she says Damn ok sorry and stops it for a total of 50 seconds before starting again

anyways in summary hs takane is like. tends not to notice personal space, hates touching stuff with her hands, likes having control over what or how she hears, and has a tough time staying still. POST STR... its all to the max. takane is overly aware of everything. all 5 senses are as much of a nightmare as they are a relief and it's all mixed together!!!!

ok her sensory needs that she already had pre ene are still there but completely amped up, except the personal space one. now everyone is always too close and literally just opening her eyes (HEH!! OPENING EYES!!!!) is super overwhelming bc WHOA EVERYTHING IS SO CLOSE AND HUGE AND HD. i could imagine comparing it to like, wearing contacts for the first time for any fellow glasses wearing people. like u know this, youve seen all this. but suddenly youre watching it differently without a frame around ur eyes and it just feels weird. for takane the frame was a screen instead of the glasses yknow. and to her its A LOT

i think post str takane keeps using her powers and having meltdowns because on top of all the existentialism she has to deal with being alive and everything, suddenly She Cannot Control Anything And It Is A Nightmare. she can't handle the lack of control she has over her needs and body temperature. just feeling hungry or sweating after walking for a little in summer makes her upset. bc she gets her body back during summer so GOOD LUCK WITH THAT GIRL. the clothes she wears feel all insane and irritated and nauseous!!! awful!!! even showers feel strange bc AUGGHHH so much is touching her at once!!! she also hates eating soooo yeah also a thing. i think she's always been a picky eater but post str its like she will only eat like 2 things or something

ON THE OTHER HAND.... it suddenly goes on the opposite end. like for a few days she's nightmare overstim city and then she's SUPER understim and COMPLETELYYYYY over eager about having a body and horribly indulges in like. overeating and running around <- overeating (especially when u usually avoid eating), awful for ur tummy. running a lot when u have chronic pains, also awful for ur pains later. sooo nothing she wont pay the price for later. it needs to get pointed out to her she needs to find a balance and cant have all or nothing (by haruka probably)

the personal space thing comes back here like she gets So touchy and needs hug or death. i think she can be all happy hugging haruka and all of a sudden pushes him away and is like WHOA I NEED TO GET OUT OF MY BODY RIGHT NOW MAYBE RIP MY SKIN OFF TOO MAYBE so it's rly like a light switch all of a sudden she can get overwhelmed with it and revert. like jumping back and forth between seeking and avoiding sensation.

i drew this once but haruka with his arms inside of takane's sleeves LOLLL i think skin to skin rly helps her when she's feeling like she needs sensation. a big part of the sudden overindulgence is OUGH IM REAL!!!! bc like i said takane isnt just dealing with having a body again she's dealing with having her Life again. being alive again. and she LOVES being alive. and the avoidance of all these sensations sometimes piles up and ends on the opposite like I NEED TO EAT���💥💥I NEED TO SCREAM💥💥💥💥I NEED TO RUN AND HUG AND KISS AND DANCE AND SWIM💥💥💥 yknow. so yeah haruka helps her a lot with it when she needs touching and hugging 🙏🙏🙏 cuz he also wont get offended if she's suddenly like Ok get away from me before i explode🙏

also post str takane To Me also has mobility issues like haruka does bc all her muscles are atrophied from yknow Not moving for 2 years so it's like, even more that she has to deal with. physical therapy is incredibly invasive to her too so it's extra difficult. i think haruka and her do it together and that's why haruka is so on top of what's going on with her, he's the closest and sees her whenever she's the most vulnerable. also their situations are So similar they cant help just gravitating to each other for support. i also think haruka's the one to always point out to her when she's overindulging like Hey i love that ur rly enjoying that bigmac but i can already see you wanting to rip out ur organs later tonight so maybe dont eat a third one.

anyways ermmm takane's biggest challenge is Stop resorting to opening eyes whenever it gets too bad. like i also got sensory issues and assuming whoever is reading also does imagine having the option to just Jump out of ur body when its feeling Awful. ofc ur gonna take it when ur feeling like that. but it doesn't help takane to do it. while it helps her to calm down, it's not good in the long run. she actively wants a PHYSICAL life and work on all this. takane never wanted to die and is super motivated to get better but it's not quick or easy!!! eventually she finds a good balance i think. she's still a rly touchy person who hates grabbing her phone directly without the sleeves in the middle and will only eat like 3 things❤️ but also a hug lover❤️

[adhbabey]

hope its ok im responding to ur post abt paych critical! it is so relatable! there are lots of things i appreciate abt the psych critical/antipsych community & movement but i also like. dont understand why in the world so many ppl are like overwhelmingly against therapy. obv it doesnt work for everyone! ik its not available or accessible for everyone! but its such a vast & varied field and such an adaptable thing that like. i don’t think i’ll ever get why ppl direct their anger towards those of us who *do* benefit from therapy or find it a useful tool for recovery. yknow. what good does infighting do!!! who does that serve!! this has turned into shouting into the void a little bit, sorry about that

Yeah it's fine. Honestly I'm pretty anti psych about a lot of things, like the fact that people are abused or mistreated in medical situations and that people are forced to take medication, have their rights stripped away, etc.

And I, too, hate that people call their partners by words taken from disorders. Like, you shouldn't call people "narcissistic" or "psychotic" as an insult. Pathologicizing abusers is just really fucking harmful and stupid. The whole thing is misunderstanding why those words exist in the first place and just scapegoating mentally ill people.

But this doesn't mean words like dissociation, triggers, panic attack, depression, manipulation, gaslighting, etc. don't have their purpose and it doesn't mean everyone is misusing them. And it is just stupid to assume everyone is, and that's the problem with some people who are anti-psych.

Some people view professional help and medical terms and diagnoses as bad, and it just makes them sound like the people they disagree with. I'm psych critical, not against helpful tools and professional treatment. They should be used with consent and with autonomy. Removing and gatekeeping information and resources is what's bad.

I'm extremely pro-self diagnosis. Partly because I am psych critical and partly because I think we have the intelligence to figure things out for ourselves. That crazy people aren't too crazy to know that they are "crazy". That we have the ability to recognize the fact that something is wrong.

Self diagnosing people aren't stupid for taking medical knowledge and applying it to themselves, they're not pathologicizing all human experiences, and I think that people who argue that are dumb.

So like. There is a middle ground that people aren't noticing, because they lean too heavily to one side. I can't function without medication, but I'm terrified of being institutionalized and my family is somewhat ableist, so I struggle to find an option to get help. I think most people on the internet have found themselves in similar situations.

So like, the whole "stop pathologizing human experience" and that people say "the tiktokification of the internet is bad", like bitch, we all loved Vine. The whole thing is just missing the understanding that people are striving for accessibility and education, not whoever the fuck that takes it too far.

So yeah, thanks for sending an ask to let me talk about this more. Therapy does not solve all your problems, especially if your therapist is not the right one. But it's something people should still try and seek. Maybe it's helpful, maybe it's not.

But the fact of the matter is, is that people are literally just using terms to understand their experiences. Sometimes they'll take it too far, but there is a middle ground. There will always be normal and reasonable opinions within it, we should listen.

[kissgoodknight]

💕 pls and thank u. choose ur fighter. hahaha.

aw yissss 💖💖💖 i'm ofc gonna choose sir griffin bbcmerlin bc i have probably the most lore for them call that loredred

so griffin (born gruffudd) was born to two mages, though they did not meet either for a very long time and they show no signs of having magic. it's revealed later that their father is taliesin (who i revamped in my universe to make more sense and be better for the show so he's a lot younger). their parents left them as a baby with gaius, promising to be back for them later - but their parents never returned.

growing up, griffin was always kind of a weird child, but good and kind and playful and so loving. they always had a love of music and was gifted a lute by gaius at a fairly young age. they never really understood why they were so drawn to music their whole life, but it was undeniable. they're honestly about as close as you can get to being a bard without actually being one lmao. also fun fact they befriend all the stray cats that wonder around camelot!!

so at the start of season 1 when merlin comes to live with them griffin is.. honestly a bit standoffish. gaius is confused bc they're usually a lot nicer and a little jokester and he's like wth is going on. but it becomes clear they've got issues with abandonment bc of their parents and they're afraid that with merlin around gaius won't want them there anymore - which he works tireless to prove is not the case!!!! griffin does warm up to merlin (who tries very hard to be friendly with them) and they get rly close. he's like a big brother to them pretty much. they're a little appalled when he starts working for arthur bc "that guy was always a JERK to me, you should smother him in his sleep!" as gaius quickly reminds them SH, the king will NOT take that lightly, even from someone your age (uther does not like griffin bc they have red hair and make potions out of grass and mud and have been smarter than him since they were like 7)

shit goes crazy when mordred comes to camelot for the first time!!!! griffin insists on helping keep him safe and brings him gifts like frogs and sticks and demands to sit with him on morgana's bed, wooden training sword in hand, to protect him. also griffin has such a like.. little kid crush on morgana tbh like she's too old for them but they're baby and they can dream

as they grow up they grow closer with their family (which now includes the knights) and even with arthur, who is slowly changing over time and no longer a huge dick to them all the time and even promises to make them a knight one day, something that their younger and uneducated self had dreamt of for years. they're knighted as of the ending of season 3 when they're old enough and are proud to serve him !! they would've rather died than server uther. bitch

so at the beginning of season 5 it gets even WILDER bc mordred is reunited with this sleepy lil goofball when they're adults and he's like oh. oh i'm in love with them. and the feeling is MUTUAL and merlin fucking hates it. he is not happy about it one bit but he just has to deal. this is the first time in a long time there's genuine tension between him and griffin bc he confides in them about most things and they can't stand the way he treats mordred.

some time in season 5 griffin's powers finally come into play. they work in a very particular way but the gist that they figure out is that their abilities stem from giving hope and inspiration and breathing light and life into the world, generally in the form of song because they're literally a dnd bard what can i say and while afraid for them, mordred and their family are so proud

in my universe, which is the right and better and not poorly written rushed ending one, mordred still joins morgana because griffin gets seriously hurt and he uses magic to save them. he knows it will bring consequences but he'd rather that than lose his source of light. by camlann, griffin is heartbroken beyond belief - this call back to their fear of abandonment after all - and does not want to fight. they do come face to face with him on the battlefield but all they can do is find a place to hide together before griffin reveals that they were wounded, and passes out. the sight of him carrying their unconscious body is what makes arthur and morgana both pause their confrontation and think - this is two people they care deeply about, forced to be enemies, still finding a way to be lovers, just wanting to be safe and sound together. while things are still incredibly tense, they get griffin to safety to be healed and decide that maybe it's worth talking things out.

[phoenix-knight]

TW: SELF-HATE

I have so much self-hate on a daily basis. it makes me so disgusted with myself. I hate myself for hating myself. every time I make the slightest mistake that anyone as a human being does, I trample on myself as if I was supposed to be some god who should have lived up to some higher standards.

"you dumb bitch, you cannot even study for a couple of hours the day before the exam. how incompetent can you be? could you not even read through the basic stuff so that you don't stare at the answer sheet blankly tomorrow like a mannequin? i hate you. i hate the way you look, your body keeps changing, some of the pants don't fit as well, you have probably gained weight. how could you not maintain urself now that ur finally doing better than you ever were since you were diagnosed. you rarely bathe, u don't do better skincare, you don't study, you don't get enough exercise, you have not washed ur hair in a week. you are a fucking nervous wreck who procrastinates till 9 PM and studies half-assedly the next day on the subway train to college. you can't even fucking press the pause button when the deadline is literally the next day for an important exam. dumbass motherfucker, ur just never enough"

there, i spewed all the venom out. i spat it out like a mouth filled with blood and beat up face. this is what goes on in my brain again and again, poisoning my thoughts.

i am so tired all the damn time. but I cannot seem to give myself a fucking break, because as seen from the poisonous monologue above, shaming myself for not being enough is my M.O.

you know what else is funny? those words are something my parents would say, something my mom still says sometimes. its mom's words in my voice when i fucking hate how unproductive I am.

no wonder i am not comfortable in my skin, and muscles are always tense as if I am about lose my shit and breakdown. i am always judging myself, seeing my actions and weighing them in comparison to my unbelievably unrealistic crazy ass standards for myself. the conventional epitome of all things perfection is as told by society.

living in the moment? i suck at it. see, one more thing I half-ass.

BUT BITCH, LISTEN TO ME:

burnout is real and ur spiralling, stop blaming urself

fat shaming urself again? nah uh. please keep the internalized misogyny aside, and look at urself. u have been running full throttle to keep up with life. and oh my god, fucking law school. the fluctuating periods of extreme exertion, exhaustion and stagnation not to mention the sleep deprivation is probably giving ur body whiplash. weight gain is natural, and no you don't look any different, you don't need to examine urself in the mirror.

bloating is a thing, beach bikini bodies are a myth, so value ur gut and treasure that satisfied burp after eating a good meal. foodgasms >>> washboard abs

acne are not single handedly caused by ur lack of skincare, remember the pollution? the stress hormones? ur diet? ur psych meds? calm the fuck down, u did not bring this upon urself.

slut shaming? no, sloth shaming! yes, I made this up rn.

sloth shaming: noun, verb, the practice of shaming a person for being unproductive by unrealistic standards with absolutely no context. god, I do this a lot. why do you expect urself to be working 24/7? when its not even humanly possible? ur not a fucking robot. hell, even robots can malfunction when they're overworked.

what is being "unproductive" anyway? resting, chilling, doing nothing, doing all the fun things u love? scrolling Instagram, shitposting on tumblr, pinning all ur fav kpop fanart? aren't all these things that you fucking love doing? then why blame urself for being "unproductive" when the term itself has such a negative connotation? ur not unproductive, ur slothing. enjoy the me time, chew on leaves and take a nap.

bathing is overrated. bath when you have the energy to, otherwise stick to washing ur face, hands and privates. fuck it, do the bare minimum. pamper urself on a washday instead.

of course ur a nervous procrastinating wreck for the exam season, how could you not be when ur a gen z gifted burnt out kid with anxiety, depression and bpd whose whole sense of self worth is hinged on academic validation? but its fine to just pass ur exams, not pass with flying colors.

you don't have to ace everything, you don't have to be the best, smartest person in the room. you don't have to want to be the ace at everything too. ur here to feel ur own presence and be true to it. ur here to do what you want by putting in the amount of effort you currently have the capacity for. do what you can, start small, you're OK. :)

[phagvision]

what do you think about gay people who like to joke about being homophobic or just about homophobia. Or gays who are being homophobic to gay "problematic" celebrities and saying that doing that is okay because they’re also gay

#phgvision_confessions: i used to do that when i was younger too sjdhdj kill me. the thing 4 me is..

just like them, i hated being gay and that's the reason why i feel people even do that.. self-hate disguised as a joke.. you get used to all these homophobic comments irl and that's how some people try to go about it.. they start acting like they themselves don't care, edgy type of shit, you are nawt only hurting yourself but hurting other ppl.. and that isn't fair, irl you just know they cry by themselves when they hear shit like that.. #been there #done that.. jojo siwa never lied when she said karma is a BIATCH!!!!

on da gay off topic.. all these gays who spread homophobia to other gays have that as their usual clapback answer every fawking time someone question them aajshwksjd but what can we really do about it ?@ they won't be laughing when that happens to them tho, ZAAAMN awareness is also a biatch..

yknw i've saw all these disgusting comments on twt and i just realized how glad i am that i'm nawt on there anymore.. cause now i can see these people are rly miserable.. as i was once, i dont regret it tho cause i learn from it. social media does that to you, it just makes it easier to think ur cooool by doing whatver you see others do, whole time you're just.. nothing. bitch you are NOTHING ! ! literally.

that's all the explanation you need..humans will go after and try to emulate anything they see that's how we work, online isn't that different.

i'm not even trying to be da "gay police" here cause who TF am i.. but they don't even get how that affects them on the long run.. u think the internet is one thing that it's completely seperate from itself, but it just isn't.

every comment.. every thing you say, it's energy, i knw i sound crazy and spiritual as hell rn but it's truee...your brain is always active, always, you internalize all these words... all these million of posts.. all that influence.. it affects your body mind and self, it is difficult.

i always say let people make mistakes and learn from them, we only got one life anyways..we are all a bunch of fucked up kuntz..more learning and less worring #alwayz

it takes like 1 second to realize gay people only have other gay people.. and as they do that kind of shit, it's the perfect way to give straight people a "pass".

like congratz..you spread homophobia around and now you have multiple straight h0es giggling at us TOO. LIKEE they really think they're on the teammm and now its justified WJJDEKWN HELP ME SOMEBODY HEEEEEEEEEEEELP

the fact most people don't realize that is beyond me. just wake da hell up okay..straight people should NEVER LAUGH 🔊 period.

[the-un-slash-emotionals]

they missed my hearttt (or did i?)

Hey!! no i didn't just abandon everyone, ok i kinda did i've been thinking about abandonment after entering a chapter in our lives,, abandonment of ur previous life, maybe previous friends, well not all of them but def some... the dynamics just dont stay the same :/ thats what i'll talk about here , new chapters in lives , and where things change, some for the better, some not so. the issue has been bugging my human for a while now, on how much their life changed when they entered this page in their life book. so naturally, i took an interest in it too, because they're one of the few people i actually care for a lot :>

been really obsessed w this song lately " Downriver from the Moundsville Prison graveyard" its crazy how much you humans need to change temperaments when going away from your homes for the first time. especially for the highly agreeable types, the real world can be *hell*. at some point or the other, and to be real, probably very soon, you'll be..exploited. for your state of being. for your mind. for your efforts. for everything which should be celebrated in a utopic society, you'll be used, till you cant anymore, whats the point, what the fuck are ethics in this dystopia? so you adapt. your tender being hardens, being taken over by one of the few possible scenarios - the type to never open up again, not have an outer persona at all, just a shell, the well intent siren that has now lost its voice in this surface market. OR you'll bury it deep within you, and very carefully craft an outer persona - one that sets boundaries, knows how to be a functioning member of society (to varying extents), and takes part in the great facade themselves - they become what they swore to destroy. Selfishness takes over, and can you even blame them? isn't it the world that *forced* them to be as such? and yet they yearn...for the home that cant be anymore. OR you'll become cold. you hold the world at an arm's length, you dont let anyone close, you're too smart for that to happen. you dont trust these puny humans, what have they ever done good for you anyway? you start neglecting the realm of emotions,,,both others' and yours. and in my personal opinion, thats the worst person to be. OR you'll be good at this shit. you can be cold, but present as a chill person with little on their mind. your general attitude towards people is "decent till observed otherwise" - you take things less personally, you do well in your work, you have a fantastic outer aura,,,and inside you're dying. you need a home. someone who values your empathy instead of using it, someone who heals the healer, listens to the listener, comforts the comforter,, and often times when such a person is found, the human spills themselves too quick. all their deepest parts, all conversed upon in a matter of weeks. it then depends on the people and the situations where this leads them.. my human falls in the last one :/ at this point you debate what to do. you have two choices - either be you. the core you. the giver, who thinks of others before themselves, the conscientious, who believes in self competency, the agreeable, with no ill motives, and at the same time, the exploited, who just keeps getting used. the alternative can be a scary step. you start to notice the bad in people - back bitching, genuine words of hate, ill intent being practised in real time (including selective inclusion/exclusion, topics being discussed only with some people, money matters, bigotry in religious/queer realms etc etc). and you start choosing some of these too. the start is always slow. you begin with preferential treatment - not treating everyone the same, being kind to some while cold to others, the whole package. it eventually leads to fake laughs and small talk, and (the most significant part, imo) building "work friend" connections. these are people you only know to use them, to gain something from them, and they most probably treat you the same way. and yk whats the worst part ? this loveless bond is sometimes more fulfilling than the love ones .. " Sometimes it's easier to be fake than it is to be not. " and that, is a *bad* fact of reality but we all live in the same world. so no point whining,, or is that whole thought process just wrong?

^^ Joe Goldeberg, from the show "You", is a pretty good example of a kind soul turned dark by the world and life. so i leave this for you guys to decide - do you take the spear of manipulation for your own use? or do you bind to your own ethics and forever bask in the comfort that you were stronger, because you never lost yourself ? thats x8c signing off. until next time, humans （︶^︶）